#Bartholomew Fair

[detroitlib]

From our stacks: Illustration "The Unicorn Ram [from a loose print to be had at the Show]," from Memoirs of Bartholomew Fair. By Henry Morley. With Facsimile Drawings, Engraved Upon Wood, by the Brothers Dalziel. London: Chapman and Hall, 1859.

"This is the famous Unicorn Ram, shown at Bartholomew Fair, in the year 1790."

[vox-anglosphere]

Cloth Fair was the heart of the busy textile trade in mediaeval London

An authentic English pub and London's oldest house are on the same street. 41-43 Cloth Fair is the last Tudor style building left in the city.

[travsd]

Happy St. Bartholomew's Day

Happy St. Bartholomew’s Day

After our last post, you may think it impossible for us to get any more Anglophile on Travalanche today. Challenge accepted! For August 24 is traditionally St. Bartholomew’s Day, the traditional opening day for one of London’s great annual festivals, Bartholomew Fair, which was held from 1133 to 1855. Readers of this blog and my book No Applause know of my love for traditional European fairs,…

[oh-dear-so-queer]

In 1719, Catherine Jones appeared before the criminal court of the Old Bailey in London charged with bigamy for making a second marriage when her husband of six years, John Rowland, was abroad. Her defence was that her marriage to Constantine Boone was no real marriage as Boone was a hermaphrodite.

According to the less-than-reliable record of the Newgate Calendar, a witness told the court that Constantine Boone had been raised as a girl and taught needlework until she ran away to sea as a 12-year-old boy. Catherine Jones said in her defence that Constantine Boone had been exhibited as a hermaphrodite at Bartholomew Fair and other places. Constantine Boone confirmed that this was true, and other witnesses said that Constantine Boone tended to be more female than male. The jury accepted the defence – that there was no marriage since Constantine Boone was a hermaphrodite, and released Catherine Jones from the charge of bigamy.

"Normal Women: 900 Years of Making History" - Philippa Gregory

[badsalmonella]

Things are looking rough for the basic bitch Bartlett Sher defenders on this night

[monster-noises]

not to be basic but 1 and 2 from that meta ask meme?

all the question are on the list for a reason Anon! no need to put yourself down for it v-v 1&2 are Excellent questions I"m happy to answer! now. I Imagine you intended this for Lazarus, But! you were not specific so you will now get a Very long post about Everyone >:3c (and by everyone I mean the main 3 characters I consider 'Bartholomew's Nasty Little Bastards')

First up, of course, we will do Lazarus! 1. What inspired you to create your oc?

The really obvious answer here is Re8, my instant consuming love for it and for Karl, the overwhelming need to like... Participate, somehow, in that world, but not being able to cross the Full self-insert hurdle.. He's basically a very Warped-beyond-recognition version of a self-insert, a guy all his own but in somewhere still very Connected to the Me. But the more like.. in depth stuff, like what inspired Lazarus to Be Who He Is is like.. I love like.. weird Art Gore, Body-As-Art kinda shit, Meaningful and disturbing.. somehow Comforting and he's kinda the perfect vessel for that. I've had the Human Taxidermy Artist thing floating around the back of my mind for a decade or so just Waiting for a place to land and Laz was a golden opportunity v-v.

2.Why does your oc look the way they do? What are your reasons for their appearance? When I was settling Lazarus's design I wanted him to have this appearance of like, a very refined and elegant individual; beautiful in a sort of Severe way, but twist it up ever so slightly so he registers as Uncanny and Gross. Beauty Hiding Filth and all that. (just think about how many Fluids get into that Velvet Ensemble on the daily, it's Not Good.) Like the way his pants cut him and the vertical lines make him just All Leg. And his pallid bloodstained skin which makes him look like a Walking Corpse, hair slicked back with its own grease.. a figure that's bewitching and unsettling to witness also yes, the hair is Both a Me thing and a Bride of Frankenstein thing.

Virgil always feels right coming Second on these things.. 1. Inspiration Virgil is ooooooooooold, he's so Old, virgil is Ancient Virgil is possibly my oldest still-in-use OC, I created him a Looooooong ass time ago. like 2010 Long Ass Time. That is to say I do not know Why she exists.

Okay, Not entirely true. I made her for a comic I was writing with my friend at the time. She was my part of the main villain pair, but I do Not remember how I ended up on Toxicologist prodigy but make it Cowboy (which was always a bit of a misnomer for the vibe but nowadays Especially he's less Johnny Cash more Nickleback) I Think, I Think, what I wanted was to have a character that contrasted the Hardest against my friends main villain? who was very Orderly and Serious and Efficient?? beats me though that was So long ago.. I was also just listening to a Lot of Nickleback-esk music at the time, which may have been an influencing factor lmao

2. Appearance Virgil's appearance is pretty simple to explain, all told! He's a Country Boy/Girl, rowdy and ostentatious, and very secure in her understanding of that part of herself. It's where she comes from, and despite his rocky relationship with home it's who he is, y'know? The brightest (and most dangerous) mind in Toxicology doesn't Have to look exactly how you'd Expect her to look now does she? (Virgil pictured here on the Right)

Now our wonderful little Ulysses vwv)/ 1. Inspiration oh this is an Interesting one!! Ulysses (and Charlie, for that matter) came from 2 distinct places to land where they are now.. From time to time I like to entertain the idea of starting a band and having a musical career of some kind, something that blends my love of folk/bluegrass, prog-rock, and power metal into a loud villainous and exhilarating sound. and a few years back, as I was getting into Bluegrass for the first time, I was struck by a Concept for a Concept Album. It was called The Book of Brother UIysses; the story of a sniveling little priest in the frontier days and his Cursed Book, following him around as he fed townsfolk to whatever entity lived in its pages until he was finally Consumed himself. I toyed with it for a bit and eventually put it back on the shelf until the Musical Fancy struck me once more, untiiiiil I was listening to friends at the table: sangfielle and had both a deep desire to do a Horror-Fantasy Western ttrpg And satisfy my ever-present desire to weasel my way into playing two characters at once.. and I pulled ol' Ulysses off the shelf again and made some.. Additions. This has evolved now into them being just like.. free floating OC's? I don't plan on making a comic out of them, I would Still love an opportunity to play them in a TTRPG setting, but I'm not Banking on it, and hey, who knows, maybe I Will make that album someday, but for now they just kinda amorphously Exist within Something resembling a Narrative in my head after a long and complicated journey...

2. Appearance Similar to Lazarus, I wanted Ulysses to be unsettling, but in a Slightly different way. He's too clean- his all black outfit is never grimy, he is clean shaven his hair perfectly quaffed, with that plastered on grin, under eyes obscured by reflective glasses the vibes are just Immediately Off. To the flip side of that I always wanted him to look kinda.. pathetic. When we see him outside of his Persona as The Keeper of the Book, as just a man that is still Human in many ways; he's just.. small, waifish, behind the glasses his eyes are big and jittery, like a pray animal caught in a snare and still trying to fight its way out..

[bartholomew-the-frog]

Barthy went to a fair!

He had a lovely time riding rides, eating snacks, and playing games!

This lovely art is by @ghostly-bugs ! Thank you so much for it! It's adorable!

[dippityart]

trust leo to remember ANYTHING

[1900scartoons]

Labor Day, Indeed

September 2, 1907

In the first panel, a man goes fishing, in the next, he carries an umbrella in a parade, and then takes his children to a picnic and the State Fair. He clearly becomes more tired as the day goes on.

The caption reads "He goes fishing early in the day, but is sure to get back to parade. Then takes the kids to a picnic and to the State Fair in the afternoon."

Labor Day is a federal holiday, so most people had it off from work.

From Hennepin County Library

Original available at: https://digitalcollections.hclib.org/digital/collection/Bart/id/5889/rec/237

[detroitlib]

From our stacks: Illustration "The Bartholomew Fair Musician: W. Phillips [from a loose print, of another series]," from Memoirs of Bartholomew Fair. By Henry Morley. With Facsimile Drawings, Engraved Upon Wood, by the Brothers Dalziel. London: Chapman and Hall, 1859.

[vox-anglosphere]

Though much of London did not survive the Blitz, the oldest house in the city remains standing. Shortened over the years, Cloth Fair was once a market place teeming with textile merchants and vendors.

[maypoleman1]

24th August

St Bartholomew’s Day

Drawing of Eustace the Monk. Source: Pinterest and Historycollection.com

Today is St Bartholomew’s Day and when in 1217, the saint intervened to thwart the magical attack of a French pirate fleet on Sandwich, led by the flamboyant English traitor and magician, Eustace the Monk. The enchanter had made the French vessels invisible to the English defenders, but he was undone by his former pupil, Stephen Crabbe. This literal magician’s apprentice, used his own spells to reveal the French ships and then stole aboard Eustace’s vessel and decapitated the monk. The English fleet then attacked the revealed enemy and routed them, helped by the presence of St Bartholomew himself, who appeared clothed in a red robe, to summon up a storm to scatter the French. Poor Crabbe did not live to see the victory: he was hacked to death by enemy sailors after killing Eustace. The people of Sandwich later built a chapel dedicated to St Bartholomew in thanks for his intervention.

In recognition of the shortening days, today marked the beginning of the first of the Autumn Fairs, held at Smithfield in London. A rowdy event that attracted all manner of dodgy characters in its time, it died out in 1855, but has since been revived in much more respectable guise as a fund raising event for St Bart’s Hospital in London. It is also worth noting that today marks the fortieth day since St Swithun’s Day. It is therefore a day to hope for better weather if the British summer has so far been a wash out.

[pearlzier]

“why the fuck did this shit just squirt on me,” matt's gaze narrowed at the four year old in front of him, brows raising for a moment before he yelped as he felt your hand hit him upside the head. he glared at you, “what was that for?”

“you can't swear in front of my niece!” you gawk, ruffling his hair gently to apologise for whacking him.

“okay, but, what is this,” he lifted the LOL doll, staring the shit out of it as it makes him severely uncomfortable. the little girl, however, seems positively thrilled by it spewing water whenever you filled it up and squeezed it. she giggled and clapped her hands, and matt merely huffed, proceeding to fill the doll back up with water.

“it's uh,” you grab the piece of paper with names scribbled on them, trying to find where your niece had named her dolls, and soon landing on the name, “chrissy?” matt practically burst out laughing, causing your niece to also laugh too even if she didn't actually know what was happening.

“s'this chrissy, kid? yeah?” he waved the doll around, gently holding it for her and watching as it spewed water from its mouth and made her giggle again. “like uncle chrissy? yeah, that's my girl.”

your heart practically melts, as you watch your boyfriend and your niece play together. he lifts his gaze to yours and he smiles, humming under his breath, “you look a lot like her,” your niece looks a lot like your sister, sure, but matt thinks you two look similar. both incredibly pretty, and adorable. “you two smile exactly the same.”

he looks between the both of you and that only corroborates his claims, and he nods his head again, watching as the little girl handed him a stuffed toy from her toy box. he held it gently in his hands, and he giggles softly. “come sit with us, pretty sure me and the kid are scared of you bein’ up so high.”

you were only sat on the bed, but fair enough, the kid didn't have a great sense of scale from her tiny height. conceding almost instantly, you find yourself sat beside matt, arm to arm, as your niece hands you two various things to play with. “fluffy,” she mumbles at the toy that matt's holding, and he nods gently.

“fluffy toy? or are they called fluffy?” matt looks at you for answers, blue eyes wide and soft. he's so at ease right now, it makes you feel at ease. “wait, look at the uh..” he snaps his fingers, “the list.”

you grab the list once more and your niece stabs a chubby finger at a name on the list, one that says ‘bartholomew’. you and matt both stare at it for a moment, then look up at the baby, then at eachother, and matt says exactly what you're thinking in the first place—“can she even pronounce that..?”

no, she can't, clearly, since the slurry of siunds that slipped from her wet lips were not nearly anything close to the word, ‘bartholomew’. the two of you burst into little giggles and lean against eachother. it's adorable, it's wholesome. even the kid can see it. “uncle matt?”

“yeah, kid?” he speaks up, not looking at the girl but still putting his full attention into talking to her despite the fact he's trying to set up her barbie car.

“do you like auntie?” she bats her lashes idly, chewing idly on her bottom lip as her chubby fingers tug at matt's shirt. he lifts his gaze to hers, his head leant against your shoulder. the question makes both of your brows furrow, and he nods, answering after a second.

“‘course i like auntie, she's my girl,” he says naturally, which too makes your heart warm. matt looks over at you and he interlaces your fingers together, holding your hand for a moment before he looks back at the kid with a little tilt of his head. “why you askin’, hun?”

his gaze searches hers as he sits cross-legged, and he nods his head for her to continue, tone gentle. “uhm.. are you gonna marry auntie?” matt's eyes widen and he swiftly lets go of your hand out of pure instinct.

your gaze flits to his, and when he sees that, he soon clasps your hand into his again, squeezing it. “if she wants to, sure. one day,” god fucking god, he's perfect, you say to yourself. you knew it already however this solidifed it. his blue eyes meet his and he smiles, leaning into your shoulder. “one day, kid.”

your niece seems very happy to hear this, and she continues playing with her toys like literally nothing had happened. like she really hadn't just given you two something to talk about when your sister came and picked the kid up. “you really mean that?” you spoke up after a little moment, eyes searching his as you shifted yourself a little closer.

“mean it, baby,” matt admits, leaning over to press a kiss to your shoulder with an arm around you before your niece decides conveniently that she wants something to eat. not from you, but from matt. “uncle matt? wan’ sumthin’ to eat..”

“you hungry? aight, c'mon,” he releases you gently and holds out his hand for the little girl so the two of them can head over to kitchen, before matt holds his hand out for you too. he offers a gentle smile, “i'll make somethin’ for you too.”

hey, who can say no to that? you push up off of the floor and you grasp his hand, the three of you making your way down to the kitchen. your niece bounces happily, just happy to be accompanied by her auntie and her uncle.

you realise, a little surprised with yourself that it's taken so long, that matt would make a perfect father. and that maybe that conversation you have is gonna change your lives a little more than you thought.

tags ┆.ᐟ ᰍ ︵ @junnniiieee07 , @st7rnioioss ۫ .

a/n ┆i am so full of ideas to write oh my god ୭ ✧ ˚. ᵎᵎ ✶

[mochinomnoms]

The Private (not) Thoughts of a Moray Chapter 3: They say it’s gotten out of hand, and I’m obsessed with you

Gender Neutral Reader x Jade Leech

Chapter 3 preview:

Hmm…maybe they’ll need tutoring? We can be alone then…perhaps in musicology, you’re not a very good singer, are you my pearl? …bitch. You huffed, turning your head to strictly face Riddle and Yev, blatantly ignoring Jade, who seemed confused, but still cooed.  Jade filled your head with an image of you pouting up at him, cutely rather than annoyed Are you pouting? What for? Oh, you’re so cute~  Stupid eel, it’s cause of you! Stupidstupidstupidstupidstupidstupidstupid—

[wc} - 8,471

[notes] - *dabs* enjoy and let me know if you can guess which characters the freshman are based on

back to chapter list

Chapter 3: I’m tired of this grandpa (that’s too damn bad)

You gazed into your cup as your coffee gradually lightened to a soft cream color from the oat milk, rubbing the tiredness from your eyes, despite the 9-hour sleep from last night, and stared at the young man that sat across from you in the cafeteria.

He was quite taller than many of your classmates, about Sebek’s height if you had to guess, though Sebek had grown a few inches over the summer. He was also fair, but still sported a warm complexion, which complemented his poofy, brown ponytail and dark brown eyes. In his hands, he fiddled with a small, golden necklace with a compass attached to it. 

Said man met your eyes and gave an awkward smile and wave, which you (equally awkwardly) returned before turning back to your cup of coffee to gulp it down in one go.

Fuck, fuck that’s hot. Why’d I chug thaaaaaat?

“Ah, are you okay Housewarden Y/N?” He gave you a concerned look. “That coffee was quite hot, wasn’t it?” 

You nodded quietly, clearing your throat, “I’m fine y-you don’t have to call me that, just my name or Prefect is fine James.”

Dammit, they told me that earlier! I’m sorry Housewarden Y/N! I don’t mean to disrespect!!

You sighed, I really wasn’t physically or emotionally prepared to have first-years in Ramshackle, damn you Crowley.

The student before you was James Bartholomew, Class A-12, and he was an eager, if a bit anxious man. He bore the rose-red vest and arm ribbon of Heartslabyul well, even if he wasn’t currently residing in their dorm. 

It seemed that, even with the chaos of last year, Night Raven College was practically bursting at the seems from the large influx of freshmen this year. Nearly 100 more students than average were accepted by the Dark Mirror, with no housing to accommodate. 

While Scarabia and Diasomnia were just bursting at the seams with their new students, Heartslabyul, Octavinelle, and Pomefiore were well over capacity. Luckily, Savanaclaw and Ignihyde were still rather spacious, as they had been the last few years, and students were placed in their spare rooms while the others were renovated. Crowley, ever soooo generous, offered your dorm up to the remaining students without consulting you.

James, as well as about 20 others, were said students.

“Good morning!” chipper, crisp voices piped up from behind you, interrupting the poor freshman’s internal panic attack.

Three more young students, triplets each sporting the deep midnight violet of Pomefiore, smiled cheerfully and waved synchronously. Despite being triplets, they looked remarkably different. 

“It’s us!” the one on the left began, “Wynfred!” He was average height, with short curly red hair that held two small braids with a golden moon holding emeralds, which framed his face. He was the palest of the three, covered in freckles and had sharp green eyes. Wynfred gestured to the sibling on his left. 

“Marion!” A short, maybe even more so than Riddle, man spread his arms up in joy as he shouted his name. Marion was more tanned than his sibling, and had softer, rounder features which included his droopy brown eyes. His hair was held up in a high ponytail braid, where the end held the same charm as Wynfred, replacing the stone with jaspers. 

“Silas!” The last shouted, jumping in front of their siblings, ignorant of their hands smacking into their faces. Silas was the tallest, fair, and had wide, light blue eyes. His hair was long, held in a half up-down do, with his hair band holding his matching moon charm decorated with an amethyst. 

Once the former two composed themselves, all three spread their arms out in theatrical fashion, before answering in synchrony, “The Salson Brothers!”

 …Why the fuck are they introducing themselves like that?

Stifling a laugh at James’s face, who seemed equal parts intrigued and disturbed at the triplet’s dazzling entrance, you instead cleared your throat and faced all four students. 

“Hello Y/N!” the triplets answered all at once. “Hello James!”

Oh, they are so fucking weird. 

“Hi everyone, how’s lunch treating you?” you stifled a laugh at James, and looked at the clock. “We have about an hour and a half! So we have some time to eat, and you can ask me anything you want regarding your classes.”

Clapping your hands together, you gestured for the triplets to sit at the table. While they did, you offered Grim part of your sandwich, who happily scarfed it down. 

Mmmmmhhh! Soooo yummyyy~

Marion and Silas sat next to both sides of you, while Wynfield had taken the seat next to James, who still looked mildly uncomfortable. Taking another bite of your sandwich, you clasped your hands together before speaking. 

“I’ll get it out of the way, I know Ramshackle isn’t the most glamorous of all the dorms—” you paused, sighing, “—it’s barely been a fully equipped dorm for a few months…”

It’s not too bad! We all get our own rules since there’s no one else! Silas seemed the most chipper of the tree, if his thoughts were anything to go by. I like the ghosties, they’re funny!

“As the…housewarden,” saying the words felt foreign. “I will do my best to make sure you’re all comfortable.” 

You shifted your eyes to stare at your hands, which were wringing nervously.

“I am a sophomore, a year your senior, and I am one half of a student with Grim, who you all met last night.” You looked up and smiled apologetically, as your familiar dozed off in a food coma.

“I’m afraid he’s rather food motivated, but I promise that he’s quite fun to be around.”

Gesturing your hand to the first freshman, you asked, “What’s your name, since we’ve yet to hear yours?”

EEK!

Jumping in his seat, said young man straightened nervously and took a deep breath. 

“I’m James Bartholemew! I’m from Neversea Harbor, on the western edge of the Queendom of Roses!” 

He took a bow, stopping midway and instead sitting back down out of embarrassment. 

“Sorry, force of habit…”

Wynfred stood up, and fluffed his hair before continuing, “I am Wynfred Salson, from Shalem, a nation out west across the sea, as are my siblings.” 

Gesturing to the two across the table, two brightened and giggled. 

“I’m Marion Salson—” his sibling interrupted

“—and I’m Silas Salson! Hehe!”

Smiling at the trio, you nodded, noticing a second pair of students join your table. These two were Octavinelle students. However, You weren’t sure if they were human. Apparently, it was rare for fae and merfolk to leave their homelands for a place like NRC. Azul once told you that merfolk, while fond of the stories like the mermaid princess, were at their core homebodies that were deeply attached to their homeland and wary of the surface. You remembered asking him why he and the twins had been three of only 5 merfolk at the school at the time.

“Human and merfolk relations have significantly improved in the last few centuries, but most still aren’t fond of needing transformation potions to consistently upkeep their legs. A visit once in a while is fine, but the paperwork required to simply receive a potion permit for non-magic users can take months. For those that stay longer, like the twins and I, it’s akin to a medication, lest you want to see us grow webbing and gills?”

You wouldn’t have been aware that the two were mermen if they hadn’t mentioned it. The smaller one of the pair was a tan young man just over 5 foot, sporting a slicked back black and gray undercut. Despite his height, the young mer was quite muscular and intimidating, sharp, and dark brown eyes that seemed to stare right into your soul. 

They probably would seem so if the following words didn’t tumble out of his razor-sharp toothed mouth.

“Your buddy's lookin' sharp today, Prefect! ou ain't gonna slip in a good word for me, are ya? Cross my heart, I know how to treat a dame proper!” he drawled, sliding himself in between you and Silas while draping an arm over your shoulders. 

“Mmph! T'ony, y'ur elbow's i' my face!" Silas whined, attempting to push against an unmovable object. 

Dame? Who—oh.

“Do…you mean… Epel?” you gestured at your friend who was currently sitting next to your usual group as he carved an apple into a spade for Deuce (who was delighted). 

“You see, a looker like her deserves a tough guy like me!” And, well, I can't do a pretty thing like you any favors. “Mama always raised a gentleman, so—”

You raised your hand up, interrupting him mid-sentence. Can’t do me any favors? What? 

“You do know that Epel is a guy, right?” you paused, giving you both a moment to look at Epel, who noticed and gave a happy wave. 

Waving back, you continued in a quieter voice, “He’s not fond of being mistaken for a girl, or being called cute, so mind your volume.”

Oh, she a he…

Tony paused for a bit in contemplation, before he made a sound of dismissal. “So, that a 'no' on introducin' me to him, or what?”

You snorted back a cackle, covering your mouth as giggles managed to escape you. You nodded at Tony, patting the surrounding arm in affirmation. 

“I’ll introduce you, no worries.”

Tony faced the rest of the freshman and began to introduce himself, “What's the word? Tony Lombardi 's the name, but you can just call me Jaws.”

Like the movie? That’s a bit spot on for a shark-mer.

Grinning, Tony barred his rows of pointy teeth that could rival the Leeches and snapped his jaw at James, who blanched at the sight. 

“That's how the crew back home knows me.”

Ridiculous, idiots the lot of you! 

You turned your head to look at the other Octavinelle freshman, who was as exasperated as his thoughts sounded. He was taller than average, built like a beanpole with how skinny he was. While he didn’t have any outwardly remarkable features that clocked him as another other than human, his light, wavy coral pink hair and light green eyes weren’t exactly common for even the most colorful humans in Twisted Wonderland. He also sported a beauty mark under his lip on the right side of his face, along with several soft freckles spread throughout his face. 

Meeting your eyes, the man scowled and raised his brow at you. 

What are you looking at? Stupid human. 

You quickly looked away from him, though you could hear his growing complaints.

Stupid humans with their stupid faces, I had to hear everyone talk about you all summer. You can barely do magic, what are you even doing here? The headmage should’ve thrown you out to sea to drown if he had any brain in him. 

Seemingly sharing a sixth sense for his friend’s animosity, Tony reached over to yank the unnamed fellow down to settle between you and Marion. 

“Hey, don't be a jerk, be a stand-up guy and say hello and introduce yourself proper.” Letting out a nasally laugh, Tony moved to whisper into his peer’s ear, just loud enough for you to hear, 

“Unless you're itchin' for me to spill the beans to your big bro—”

Tony was shoved off as the young man cleared his throat and straightened his uniform, “My name is Aspen Albamar, I’m a freshman in Octavinelle.”

Curt and to the point, can I go now?

Wynfred made a face as he eyed Aspen up and down, as said freshman followed in kind. 

“I saw that you had a transformation potion,” he started, ignoring Aspen’s sputtering noise. “You sure don’t look like an obvious merperson, what kind are you—”

“T-that was in my nightstand! W-why are you looking through my personal items?!” Aspen angrily hissed, his cool facade fading rather quickly. 

What is wrong with you???

“That’s not important, answer my question—”

“I will not! It’s none of your business!”

Wynfred rolled his eyes as he was interrupted again. So hostile! I was only asking a question!

Interrupted by an intentionally loud cough, you sighed in relief at the sight of your five friends. 

Jack was looking between Aspen and Wynfred as their small spat was paused mid-exchange, before opening his mouth, “Hey, Y/N, how’d being a housewarden treating you? These freshmen giving you any trouble?”

Gasp! A dog! Silas perked at the sight of Jack, visibly in awe, to which the wolf beastman was oblivious to. James, on the other hand, stiffened in front of Ace and Deuce, who you remembered were technically his upperclassman.

You found the idea of your two boys being a “shining example” of Heartslaybul morals laughable. 

“Hi guys, no it’s fine Jack, we’re just getting to know each other,” you gestured to each of the boys as you introduced them, “This is James, Wynfred, Marion, Silas—dear please don’t touch Jack’s tail—Tony, and Aspen.”

I still have like 15 other students’ names to memorize, geez. 

“Guys, these are my friends, Ace, Deuce, Jack, Epel, and Sebek!” You beamed at them as they all greeted the freshman with various ‘hellos’ and ‘what’s ups’. “Jack and Sebek are actually vice-housewardens for Savanaclaw and Diasomnia, too!”

E-eh? Vices??

James looked close to puking while Silas still attempted to swat at Jack’s moving tail, their brothers looking amused. Tony, on the other hand, was quick to throw his arm over Epel’s shoulders, who looked visibly confused. 

“Hey there, doll. Names Tony, but you can just call me the dreamboat you've been waitin' for~” he cooed, either oblivious to, or blatantly ignoring Epel’s souring mood.

Jack, Deuce, and Sebek all made noises of confusion, while Ace snorted in amusement.

Eh? What's this feller reckon he's doin'? If he don’ mosey on outta my space, I'll just have to give him a good ol' nose-thumpin'...

Epel looked ready to snap at the other man, while Ace made eye contact with you and thought, I bet you that the frosh’s gonna get launched out the window in 30 seconds. 

Before that could, thankfully, occur, Tony yelped as Aspen reached over to pull at his ear, dragging him away from the now amused Epel. 

Aspen bowed his head politely and smiled at his upperclassmen. “I apologize for this brute’s behavior.”

He sided-eyed Tony, who was now whining about his ear, still currently pinched between his fingers, hurting. 

“I’m afraid he skipped his land training camp, so he’s not aware of the differences of courting culture for surface dwellers”

Ace let out a cackle before covering his mouth after Jack harshly elbowed him in his stomach. Deuce shared a look with Sebek as Epel turned pink in a flustered anger. You could hear Deuce mutter something to Sebek about short people getting ‘angry real quick, huh?’

“Well, here’s a lesson then,” Epel grumbled shaking a finger at Tony like a mother chastising her children, “Humans don’t tend to enjoy people who invade their personal space and call them names. So unless you want to get beat up, I suggest you respect that.”

Aspen and Tony both perked up, sharing a look before smirking and looking back. 

“Ah, well, some of the more predacious merfolk do enjoy a good bit of roughhousing with their mates.” Aspen chuckled as Tony continued. 

“Yeah! So fighting one of us for flirtin’ probably wouldn’ help.” The two giggled as Epel sputtered and grabbed onto your arm. 

“Ain’t chu their housewarden?” Epel hissed under his breath, “Tell them to quit with the teasin’! I’m their upperclassman, they should respect me!”

You patted Epel’s hand as you murmured some words of comfort to your friend. 

I should probably send Tony off to his next class, if just for your mental state. 

Giving your freshmen a smile, you asked, “Say, I believe some of you have your history class next? Why don’t the others take you, so you can find the best seats?”

Meh? When did everyone get here? Grim yawned, awoken from his post-lunch nap as he climbed Deuce’s shoulder. 

“Oh good timing, Grim!” The familiar perked up, still waking up from his early afternoon food nap. “I think we split up for this next class, why don’t you take James, Aspen, and Tony with you, Ace, and Deuce to Trein’s class?”

Why do I have to watch over a bunch of newbies? The Great Grim’s too great for something so little!

Ace and Grim groaned as you continued, “I’m pretty sure it’s on the way to your guys' duel class?”

You batted your eyelashes at the ginger, who rolled his eyes and gestured for the three to follow him. Yeah, yeah. I’m coming over tonight to eat your snacks though.  

Jack nodded, catching on to your plan. “We can take the other three over to Professor Kallpa’s botany class!”

The triplets stood to follow Jack, Silas still focused on the swishing tail, though he stopped trying to grab it. Wynfred and Marion started to excitedly ask Epel about Vil and “what was it like having THE Vil Schoenheit as your housewarden?” Epel deflated. 

You sighed as both groups left the cafeteria, looking up at Sebek who met your eyes with a firm look. 

Now, now. No time for resting! You’re a housewarden now!

Before he could open his mouth to reiterate this into words, you interrupted with a stretch. You could feel a satisfying pop from your spine. 

“Hey, Sebek, you wanna walk with me to the third-years’ halls? I gotta meet Riddle there, we share the advanced potionology class.”

Wonderful! I’d expect nothing less from the Young Master’s human! I should’ve never doubted his choice in friends!

“Of course! I can tell you all about the Young Master’s time back in Briar Valley! You know, you missed quite a lot after your visit! For example, did you know…” 

You smiled and nodded along to Sebek as he rambled about Malleus’s time back home. Particularly about the amount of times he simply disappeared from the castle, causing a massive ruckus until Silver found him admiring a new gargoyle added to the north tower. 

A few minutes in, you saw Riddle walking into your path from the adjacent hall. He perked up upon seeing you and smiled, nodding politely at Sebek. 

“Hello Prefect, glad to see you coming over early for class,” Riddle turned to address Sebek, “Sebek, I have three more freshmen that have shown interest in the equestrian club, could you please add these names and numbers to the list?”

The half-fae brightened at the prospect of new club members and nodded, taking the sheet of paper from Riddle’s hands and placing it in his folder. 

“Wonderful! I will be sure to send those reminders out tonight! I’m sure any self-respecting student would jump at the chance to join our club!”  

Beaming, Sebek noticed the clock on the wall and bowed his head goodbye to you and Riddle. “I must be heading off to my next class, I will be sure to send out the reminders for the first meeting, Riddle—Oh!”

“Prefect!” Gave you a stern look as he continued, “I will be coming over this weekend to start our weekly call with the Young Master. I expect you to put everything else on hold for him! I will see you after class.” 

 Riddle gestured in the direction of your shared potionology class, which was right down the hall. 

“Shall we? Now that you are a housewarden, I expect you to set yourself as an example for our freshmen as well.” he asserted.  

I’d expect nothing less of my favorite junior. Perhaps I should give you your own special seat at the unbirthday parties?

You chuckled out, “Of course, Riddle. Your freshmen have been particularly nice, I imagine you gave them a veeeery stern talking to before they came to me?”

He huffed, holding the classroom door open before he followed you in. 

“I simply told them that, unless they wanted to lose their heads, then they’d do best to treat your word as doctrine.” 

Ah, that explains James’s behavior, maybe I should tell him to take it back down a notch—

My pearl! Please wait right there for me, I must find a seat right next to you! 

You looked up from your peripheral vision and made eye contact with the 6-foot bane of your existence. Jade gave you a small smile. 

Darling!

Immediately grasping Riddle’s arm in a crushing grip, you yanked him to follow you to a pair of seats in the middle row, a student already in the spot next to your right, leaving Riddle to sit in the only available spot next to you. 

Yelping as he tripped over his feet and the desk chair, Riddle gave you a glare as you looked at him “innocently” in your newly, self-designated spot. 

“Look Riddle, seats right smack dab in the middle of the middle row! Isn’t this nice? We can see the board at, like, the optimum view now!” you gave the less than amused Riddle a nervous smile, looking at Jade as he entered the room rather coolly 

He was wailing in grief.

Noooooooooooooooooooooo, darling… why didn’t you wait just a bit longer…

“I believe,” interrupting your focus, Riddle crossed his arms as we softly muttered, “the middle of the row would be better for our academics, as—”

“Nope!” You interrupted, looking at the doorway which was now missing the shorter Leech. “Right here is fine, yessiry, take a seat. Take a seat. Right next to me.”

Riddle blinked. Huh. 

“Right there.”

Are you alright, Prefect?

“Sit. Now. Please?”

Okay…

Riddle took his seat next to you, looking more confused than annoyed now, as you sighed a sigh of relief. 

Listen to you sigh. You sound so tired, what’s exhausting you my love?

You stiffened, trying to pinpoint from where Jade’s thoughts were coming from. 

You do look oh so delightful in your uniform! Those are new slacks, I did like the skirt, but they fit you very well. Ah! And your cute little dorm ribbon, it’s wonderful—oh, I should say something about it, then I can have your attention. 

“Hello Prefect, how—”

“SAY RIDDLE!” You shouted, drawing your companion’s attention, as well as everyone else in and entering the classroom in an attempt to avoid any manner of interaction with Jade

What a weirdo…

I wonder what’s with the Prefect? 

Quiet the fuck down. 

“U-um, say, Riddle,” you said softer, cheeks turning pink as you smiled at him sheepishly.

I do cherish you so, but what is wrong with you my friend?

“Do you want to make some sort of schedule with me to—uh—make sure your students come and do their dorm duties and stuff?”

Yes! Good excuse! Sorry-not-sorry, Jade! I gotta do housewarden stuff with Riddle, no time to talky-talk! Nope, nope, nope!

“Ah! Great idea Y/N, I couldn’t have suggested a better one myself” Riddle brought out his phone and started scrolling through a folder labeled ‘Freshman Schedules,’ showing it to you. 

“I was considering reworking the dorm duties shifts to make it so that the Ramshackle students would work less during the school week, but make up for it by working extra during the weekends.”

Riddle continued to explain his new shift system as you nodded along, attention flitting between him and Jade, who you noticed out of the corner of your eye was sitting in the spot right in front of you. 

Aaaaaaaah! I’m sitting in front of Y/N! I just wanna turn around and stare. You do have three of our students, yes? Perhaps I can use that excuse to speak with you! I can even ask you to meet me in private to discuss the details, oh~ It’ll work so perfectly! 

An image of you and Jade alone in what you thought was one of the private rooms in Mostro Lounge, lip locked and heavy petting each other flashed through your mind. 

“Jade, we’ll get caught here if we—Aaaah~” Jade was down on his knees, licking soothingly on the bite he’d left on your thigh while you ran your fingers in his hair. “Mmh, and? Everyone will know you’re mine then~” In response, you yanked Jade up to crash your lips against his, falling backwards so that you both fell on the couch with him on top. The two of you giggled against each other’s lips as you unbuttoned Jade’s shirt, hand gliding down his chest and reaching—

You covered your cheeks in your palms, shaking the scene away as if it was a bee hovering over your face. You rested your head in your hands, trying to pay attention to what Riddle was saying. Something about making two students head of the freshman, one for Ramshackle specifically. 

I’ll ask you now! Yes, then I can whisk you away. Riddle seems just about done talking anyway. 

The devil may speak in tongues, but he also speaks cruel truths, as Riddle ended his explanation. “Yes, I have a few students staying with you in mind to be the Heartslaybul leader at Ramshackle, let us meet tomorrow for the unbirthday party to work out schedules and choose one of those students.” 

You nodded, bracing yourself for the inevitable. However, it never came. Voice or thoughts, all was silent in front of you, though you didn’t dare move your gaze in front of you and test the sand. 

…Ah my heart is racing at the thought…are my palm’s sweaty? Is it just me or did they look scared seeing me earlier?

You took out your notebook and magipen, adored with a mauve gem that matched the one on Grim’s collar, and started to write the date and class subject on the first page. 

What should I say? Humans aren’t fond of spontaneous love confessions, so I have to work into that… It would be strange if I spoke to them too casually. Oh dear, this is a dilemma.

You relaxed, as mean as it might be, you were relieved that Jade seemed to be too anxious now to really have a conversation with you. 

“Hello Prefect, since you were discussing it with Riddle, may we speak about managing the few Octavinelle students you have in your care?”

DAMMIT! GOD-FUCKING-DAMNIT!!!

You looked up, still cursing Jade in your head, and gave him a small, but polite smile. “Sure, Jade, but it’d probably be better for Azul to be involved, about I come over later this week to meet with him? Could you see if he’s available?”

Jade, nonchalantly as ever, gave a polite smile and nod.

“Of course, I’ll be sure to speak with Azul tonight and have him reach out with a scheduled time.”

Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

“I’ll send him a text, but based on the schedule I have, how does Thursday evening sound?”

Why don’t we discuss it! Alone! Just me and you, my pearl. I’ll even show you the makeshift greenhouse I built, you’ll just love it!

“Sounds good, I’ll only stay for a bit though! Gargoyle studies club is then and someone has to keep Hornton’s club up and running you know!” 

You thought you could see Jade’s eyebrow twitch at the mention of Malleus, but before he could speak, the sound of Crewel’s wand whipping in his hand echoed in the room. Everyone drew at attention at the professor, 

“Good afternoon pups, welcome to Advanced Potionology and Magical Pharmaceuticals. Today we will start by reviewing the syllabus and my expectations for this class.”

Crewel handed out small stacks of papers, you assumed the syllabus, to the students at the front rows to be passed out behind them as he continued. 

“Seeing that you all needed extraordinary marks in your previous potions class and final exams in order to place in this class, I expect nothing but the best from you pups.” 

As Crewel continued to explain his expectations, you saw Jade turning to hand you his stack. Pursing your lips, you reached over to take the papers, the tips of his fingers ghosting over yours ever so slightly. 

You recoiled, papers in hand, like you’d been shocked and nodded at him. Jade on the other hand was absolutely elated as his hands ever so slightly shook in excitement, hardly noticeable, turning back around to face the board. 

AAAAAAAAAAAA! CUTECUTECUTECUTECUTECUTECUTECUTECUTECUTECUTE—

You took a deep breath as you handed the stack back, trying to ignore the flood of infatuated thoughts from in front of you. You also decided to ignore the sudden images of you in maid lingerie.

Seriously?

“Each of you should have received a syllabus by now. For the structure of this class, we will be splitting you into groups of four, let’s see here…”

Crewel began naming off groups of four, waving his wand to rearrange the seats and tables for the groups, cauldrons, tubes, and similar items floating from the nearby closet and setting on. It kinda looks like a chemistry classroom now.

The first few groups set themselves up at their new tables, while you perked up hearing your name. 

“Riddle Rosehearts and Y/N L/N” you and Riddle shared a happy look, sharing a smile. “With Jade Leech and Yev Quispe.”

YES!

Your smile dropped, a nervous look replacing it, much to Riddle’s concern. 

“Are you alright Y/N? You look a bit nervous?” Riddle placed a hand at the small of your back as he guided you to your new seating lay out. 

“It’s just Jade and Yev, you've met Jade before and Yev is very polite, if a bit full of himself.” Riddle whispered the last bit to you, making you giggle your nerves out. 

Crewel smacked his wand-whip for your attention again. “Once you’ve settled into your groups, start with a class introduction, become familiar with your group mates, as they’ll remain the same for the year.”

Clearing his throat, your red-headed friend took the lead. 

“My name is Riddle Rosehearts, Heartslaybul’s housewarden.” He gestured to the student next to him, which happened to be Jade. 

“You both already know me, but for our new friend here-” Jade politely nodded at Yev, who returned the gesture. “I am Jade Leech, vice housewarden for Octavinelle.”

Yev puffed his chest out, gracefully gesturing his hand to his chest. 

“I’m Yev Quispe, I was recently placed as Pomefiore’s housewarden, I do believe we had few interactions the last two years, so it’s a pleasure to met you.” 

Yev locked eyes with you, smirking as he eyed you up and down. 

And then there’s you.

“And I’ve yet to be properly introduced to you, the infamous Prefect. How about you introduce yourself?”

It’s you! My little pearl! You chose to not glance at Jade. 

You nodded politely, responding a bit shyly, “Hi, we met at the check in, but I’m Y/N L/N, I-uh-skipped a year aaaand I guess I’m Ramshackle’s housewarden? Hehe…” 

Despite the proximity between Riddle and Yev to you, Jade’s thoughts overpowered them, 

Y/N’s class introduction…their voice was… really cute. Their moans are probably really cute too. 

“Aaah~ R-right there Jade! Your mouth feels—mmf~”

You shut your eyes tightly, rubbing your temples and eyes harsh enough that you could see spots spattering across your vision. 

God I wish I could turn this off.

“Uh, Prefect?”

“Yes, Riddle?” you sighed, dragging your hands down your cheeks. 

“Are you alright?”

You held an ‘okay’ symbol with your hand. “Yep, what were we talking about?”

Riddle explained the class schedule for the semester, pointing out when certain papers and projects were due and working out a meeting time for your group. 

As the class continued, everyone’s thoughts mellowed out a bit, even Jade’s own. For the most part, your peers were focused on figuring out their plan for their groups and work. Surprisingly, there were very few thoughts about things like ‘what’s for dinner?’ or ‘I wanna take a nap after class today.’ or even ‘this class is boring as hell.’

Maaaan, I’ve been hanging around A-Deuce and Grim for too long, I forget everyone in this class are a bunch of high-strung overachievers. 

You looked at Jade who was currently taking notes down as Riddle and Yev discussed (argued more like) about whose schedule should take priority. 

“Our meetings must be after 5:00pm! Rule number 345: Croquet must never be played after 5:00pm-”

“I’m sorry, but I’m not privy to follow the ridiculous rules of your dorm.” Yev sneered at Riddle’s angry flush. “I am not available after 5, I have a very strict self-care routine that must not be interrupted-”

The two continued bickering, cursing each other out in their heads. 

You pompous fool! Ridiculous? What’s ridiculous is you and the “secret” lab that everyone knows about! How is it secret when everyone knows about it!?

Who gives a damn about your 810 rules? One of them is contingent of a hedgehog sneezing, and I’m being ridiculous?

Your eyes kept darting between the two, slightly amused. It was like watching a game of tennis, where one thought the ball was hit just enough out of reach for him to win the match, just for the other to jump over and continue their fight. 

As they continued, you decided to daydream a bit and listen in to the other students and your professor. It seemed that Crewel was thinking about stopping at Sam’s at the end of the day for some treats for one of his dogs. 

Genghis has been a bit lethargic lately, maybe she’d appreciate a new snack…something heart healthy for her though so nothing processed.

A few of the students were thinking about what they’d have for dinner, one of the Scarabia students was lamenting about being put on chopping duty by Jamil. 

He’s gonna make me chop everything again I just know it! He always says I do it wrong, why does he keep making me do it then?

You hid your amused smile behind your palm as you rested your head against it. You decided to look at Jade, whose thoughts were rather quiet at the moment.  

Jade was still dutifully writing down notes, of what at this point, you didn’t know. He also was amused at the two housewardens still bickering, albeit less heated now. 

“May I suggest we meet during study hall?” Jade asked, drawing the other two’s attention. “I do believe they overlap for us, do they not?”

Yev shook his head and gestured towards you. “Not for the sophomores, don’t you have a morning study hall, Prefect?”

“Oh, yeah and I kinda need study hall anyways to catch up on all the practical magic stuff.” You replied sheepishly. 

“Of course,” Riddle chimed in agreement. “It’s to be expected since you didn’t grow up in Twisted Wonderland.”

Yev rolled his eyes, while Jade’s focus was shifted to you once more.

Hmm…maybe they’ll need tutoring? We can be alone then…perhaps in musicology, you’re not a very good singer, are you my pearl?

…bitch.

You huffed, turning your head to strictly face Riddle and Yev, blatantly ignoring Jade, who seemed confused, but still cooed. 

Jade filled your head with an image of you pouting up at him, cutely rather than annoyed

Are you pouting? What for? Oh, you’re so cute~ 

Stupid eel, it’s cause of you! Stupidstupidstupidstupidstupidstupidstupid—

“Prefect!” Riddle called for you, startling you out of your inner rant. “Pay attention! I asked if you had another suggestion for a meeting time?”

“Oh, um,” you cleared your throat. “Maybe during lunchtime? It’s the same for everyone, and we’ll be heading over here anyway soooo?”

Riddle nodded in agreement while Yev shrugged and replied, “I suppose that could work, I do have a private ‘lab’ of sort we could use-”

“Is it really private if everyone knows about it?” Jade asked, looking amused at a now visibly annoyed Yev. 

“Do you want the room or not?!” 

“We’ll take it!” You and the other two exclaimed together, right as the bell rung for the next class. 

“Alright pups!” Crewel spoke up over the bell as you and the other students began to pack up. “I do hope you and your group had a productive discussion, tomorrow we will review the class schedule and start our first module! Have a good day pups.”

You could here the internal groans and whines of some of your classmates. Quite a few spent the class time straight up arguing with their group, not unlike Riddle and Yev. 

Damn it, why’d I have to sit next to these dumbasses???

Crap, we just talked about our partners and dates, maybe I shouldn’t’ve grouped with friends? 

A shiver down your spine alerted you to Jade’s voice before you even heard it, like you were developing a sense for danger, much like an arachnid superhero from your world. 

Perhaps I should ask my pearl on a date? Yes, ease into it with a study session first, then we can follow up with a dinner at the lounge, I’ll make Floyd cook it. 

You froze in panic, images of the two of you transitioning from a normal, admittedly nice dinner to the both of you wrapped up in each other’s naked bodies in his bedroom.

Yes, I’ll lock him out of his room if he doesn’t agree. 

Contemplating the best escape plan, you clumsily stacked your notebooks and pen in your arms, locking on Riddle as your savior. 

“Riddle—”

“Ah, apologies Prefect,” Riddle started to walk away as he looked at the time. “Could you message me at the end of the day? My next class is in the wing across the castle, and I must leave now if I’m to make it on time. Goodbye!” 

Ah, good then perhaps I could escort them to class in his stead? Out of the corner of your eye, you could see Jade approaching you. 

Fuckfuckfuckfuck, what’s that other asshole’s name? Yev!

You turned to ask Yev if he would walk with you to the next class. “Um, Yev could I—”

Ugh, what do you want? Yev smiled at you and gave a “sympathetic” look. 

“I’m sorry, could this wait until tomorrow? I must be getting to my next class.” He waved you off as he walked away and called over his shoulder, “I’m sure whatever it is, you can handle it, after all you’re the ‘Ramshackle Prefect’, ta-ta now!”

Shit! No, please! I don’t care if you’re an asshole, come back!

“Oh my Prefect, did you want someone to walk with you to your next class?” 

Startled, you looked up at the teal-haired man, who loomed over you with a glint in his eyes and his usual smile. You could tell he was holding back from just giving you a gleeful grin.

“Ah, no! It’s fine,” You started to stutter as you waved your hands around, “I have to go to alllll way to the botanical gardens, l walk by myself—”

Jade interrupted you as he placed a hand on the small of your back to guide you out of the classroom. “It’s no trouble at all, I’m heading to the fields for flight class, so it won’t be out of my way at all.”

Aaaaah! Cute! My cute little Y/N! So small, so soft, you’d look smaller even if you were on top of me…

No touchy! Nope! I’m not encouraging this at all!

You slightly sped up your pace, placing a small distance between him and you as Jade daydreamed about your thighs spread across his lap, arms wrapped around his neck as he shoved his face into your neck. 

“If you say so…” You quietly replied, moving so that you were walking side by side instead. 

Jade seemed disappointed at the lost of contact, but content to be by your side. 

We do seem like a couple right now, don’t we? After all what gentleman wouldn’t escort his beloved to their destination?

You stayed silent, hoping that the lack of conversation would deter him. The crowd of students in the hallways dispersed as you exited the castle onto Main Street, leaving you two alone minus a on or two other students. 

Ah, just the two of us, this is the perfect time to ask them out! 

Taking in a sharp breath, you braced for the words you dreaded to come out of Jade’s mouth.

Yes…

You waited. 

…Any moment now. I’ll ask.

Sam’s shop was in view, thus the spot where you two would spit was coming up. 

Hmm…my chest…hurts? Why is it hard to breathe?

The gymnasium was in view now. You peered at Jade from the corner of your eye. He still looked as nonchalant as you’d come to expect. 

This is fine. It’s not as if they’ll say no…probably. Ha…it’s very hard to breath now. Is this what drowning feels like? Why am I dreading this? I want to ask them out! …Right?

You cleared your throat as you walked away and into the direction of the gardens. “I’ll be heading over here, uh, see you tomorrow?”

Jade nodded and gave you a pleasant smile as the sounds of screams and sobs echoed in your mind. 

“Of course, I look forward to working with you Prefect, have a good day.”

CURSES! DAMMIT, DAMMIT, DAMMIT! WHYYYY—

You quickened your pace, almost jogging, as you heaved a sigh of relief. 

Finally, god I can’t wait to lay down and just pretend I never heard any of that!

“Aw, come on! Spill it!” Ace pouted as he lay across your bed, throwing one of your pillows in the air to catch. 

He must have some freaky thoughts! Tell me, I wanna blackmail him!

“No???” You looked at him in disgust, trying your best to not throw your history book at him. “Especially not for blackmail, what do you think he’s gonna do to you if you try and blackmail him?”

Deuce, tiredly eyes boring into his mathematics homework, replied in agreement, “Yeah, what do you think he’s gonna do? Laugh and say ‘you got me’?”

Uuuuuuuuugh you two are boring!

Ace threw the pillow at Deuce. “I don’t know man, I just want a leg up on him, I’m still not over the anemone thing, you know.”

You sighed, watching Grim through the window as he tried to show his prowess on the broom to one of the Scarabia freshmen in your care. Wincing as the broom zoomed out of his grasp and he splat face down into the ground, you slid down your armchair and crossed your arms over your head. 

“I’m tired of this already.” You whined, opting to ignore your homework, rather walking over and flopping ontop of Ace on your bed. The ginger softly shrieked, turning into a starfish underneath you. 

 Of homework? Cause mood. Deuce nodded sympathetically, daring to look back at the question he’d been stuck on for the last 10 minutes. 

“Mmpht! Th’t’s w’at y’ get—mmft git opp!” Ace shove you off him as he continued, “That’s what you get for being nerds, hehe!”

Kicking your friend, you made yourself comfortable as you took a pillow and rested your head, arms crossed underneath it. 

“Not about school, dipshit, I mean the telepathy.” You murmured, eyes closed. “I don’t want it anymore. I’m tired of it, it lost its appeal. Can you take it?”

Ace snorted as he rested next to you and started scrolling on his phone. “Nah, I’m good, Deucey?”

Huh? What? Deuce perked up, blinking in confusion. “What? Sorry, I wasn’t paying attention.”

“Take the mind reading! I’m sick of it! Someone else can deal with y’alls thoughts.”

Deuce made a sound of understanding, getting up to stretch his arms and legs before walking over and patting your back. 

“Uh, I think I’m good, if Jade is any indicator of the people in this school, I don’t think I could be mentally well hearing all that.”

You opened an eye to glare at Deuce. “… And you think I can?”

Deuce held his arms up in surrender, awkwardly thinning his lips in response.

“I just mean that, it came naturally to you, you know?” Deuce decided to sit on the ground and lean against the bed, tilting his head to look up at you.

“You got magic, then the mind reading? Maybe you’re meant to have it.”

“Oh yes,” you drawled sarcastically, “I’m meant to listen to each whine, complaint, mindless thought that everyone has, oh and don’t forget every horny man’s dirty thoughts! That’s especially important!”

You huffed, turning on your back and crossing your arms.

Aw, Y/N I didn’t mean it like that, don’t be mad. Deuce turned and rested his chin on the edge, giving you a puppy-eyed look. 

“I just mean that, there’s probably something great you’re meant to do?” Deuce grunted as you smacked a hand on his head before ruffling his hair. “I don’t know, just looking at the bright side.”

You hummed in response shrugging. “Maybe, who knows, not me, not Crowley. It’s just super fucked man, how ‘m I suppose to react?”

Blackmail, duh?

“Ace! Shut the fuck up about the blackmail, man!” 

Ace kicked your leg, to which you responded in kind. The two of you began exchanging kicks until you both of your feet were planted against each other. Pushing against each other’s foots for some weird form of dominance, the three of you started giggling. 

What the fuck? Deuce took his phone out to record as he laughed, “You two are so weird.”

The laughter grew as your left foot gave out, allowing Ace’s right leg to kick you off the bed. You gave a short scream as you fell on Deuce, still giggling. 

“HA! I win! I claim this bed as my prize!” Ace crawled over to look over you two before letting out a panicked yelp as you and Deuce yanked him down to join the floor. 

The three of you calmed down, sprawled out on the floor. Ace asked, “Does he actually say anything to you? Jade, I mean.”

Humming, you looked at Ace and scrunched up your face. “Eeeeeh?”

“‘Eeeeeh? What does that mean?” Deuce asked. 

“I mean, he acts and speaks the way he did before…he was gonna try and ask me out, but…”

But? Ace and Deuce’s synchronized thoughts created an echo in your brain, which seemed ironically empty after studying. 

“I think he’s…scared? To ask, I mean.” You made a sound of pity, pursing your lips. “It was…kinda sad actually? Now that I think about it.”

“Huh.” Ace hummed while Deuce mimicked your pitying sound. “He is just some guy, I guess. A scary, monster looking guy, but still just a guy.”

That does sound kinda sad, actually. He always seems so self-assured. Deuce clicked his tongue and spoke out loud. 

“Maybe he’s scared of rejection? He kinda seems like the type of guy that was never told no, growing up.”

“Ha,” Ace snorted, “probably because everyone was scared he’d eat them if they did.” 

“Yeah.” You replied in faux sympathy. “Just like how your girlfriend broke up with you ‘cause she was scared of the kids you’d produce with your ugly ass face.” 

You and Deuce started laughing at your offended friend. The laughter grew as he flipped you off. 

“You know what, I’ve decided I no longer sympathize, I hope he literally thinks about every single weird kink in existence with you, you fuck face.” Ace pouted as you two continued to laugh. 

Your laughter died down as you heard a knock on the door. Clearing your throat you called out, “It’s open, come in!” 

The Scarabia student from earlier, poked their head in and smiled nervously. 

“Hi, uh, Prefect? Grim got knocked out…he ran into the tree trying to show us a Spelldrive trick.”

The student entered, true to their word, cradling the now limp familiar as they placed him in your outstretched arms. 

“Also, one of the other Scarabia students, Yakub, finished making the dinner you suggested! They wanted me to call you down to dinner too.”

You smiled and nodded, grunting as you and the other two got up from the floor. 

“Thank you, I’ll be down shortly, you two,” You pursed your lips at Ace and Deuce. “Should he back to Heartslaybul, Riddle will probably be back from his club soon, don’t want to get in trouble so soon.”

Ace snorted as he grabbed his backpack from the nightstand. “Look whose talking! Dear ‘I broke an ancient chandelier on the first day of class’ Prefect.”

“That was also you, though??” Deuce gave Ace an incredulous look as he packed his stuff. 

Gods up above, why is he like this?

You chuckled, following the two as they walked out to the front door. 

“Ah, what would’ve I done if that never happened? I’m actually pretty grateful that turned out the way it did.” You smiled fondly. 

I never would’ve met you two if I didn’t. 

The two looked at you, needing no powers to know what you were thinking.

“Aww, is this where you confess your love to me?” Ace grabbed your shoulder and looked at you with a serious face. 

“Just so you know, I’m only into hot people.”

“Okay, goodbye!” You shoved Ace out of the door, waving as he and Deuce walked towards the Hall of Mirrors.

You sighed, still cradling Grim in your arms as you cooed down at him, “Let’s get you some food, I’m sure you’ll wake up once you smell some yummy din din!”

Locking the front door, you greeted the 20 freshman in your dorm. Silas, who decided to help with the cooking, noticed you and handed you a glass of what you presumed to be the apple juice Epel left you. 

“Here Y/N.” Gentle pushed you to the front of the dining table. “Give a toast!”

You chucked nervously as you obliged. “Alright guys, let’s christen our first evening at Night Raven College with a meal!” You smiled and raised your glass. 

“Ramshackle students or not, I am happy to be your housewarden this year. For however long you stay, may this old dorm bring you nothing but luck and cheer in your first year! Let’s dig in!”

The group shouted in merry agreement as you took a slip of your drink, unaware of the glower coming from the coral-haired man in the corner. 

Forgoing dinner and leaving the room in a huff, Aspen stomped into the room designated to him and three others. Muttering to himself, Aspen dressed down into his pajamas, before taking out a journal from his nightstand. 

“I’m going to prove to everyone what a sham you are,” He snarled, furiously writing something down. “Then, no one will have any reason to admire you, let alone like you!”

[cod-dump]

I had a silly thought about Moose

I feel like he would own fish as a pet

Not anything fancy either

Just some silly goldfish with eyes looking different ways

And he'd name them really generic names like Bob or Sam, but there would be one. One with the most long ass name ever. Something like Gerald Bartholomew Augustine the third.

:D

He 1000% has fish.

___

Moose is a very good fish owner and hates hearing how people talk after their fish dying after a couple of days or so of having them. He’s had two gold fish for seven years. Stan is a black and gold goldfish and Countess Esmeralda Angelina (the Shadows call her Countess EA for short and there’s someone always asking about EA Sports and how she’s doing) is a reddish orange goldfish.

He got them both at a fair and has had them ever since. Out of all the animals that has come and gone throughout his life, he will say those fish were his most beloved. He’s constantly getting tank decorations from the Shadows to decorate their tank with so Moose makes a habit to redecorate their tank whenever he cleans it. Shadows are constantly coming into his room to check on the fish and just watch them swim happily in their tank.

For his next birthday, Graves and ten Shadows (these Shadows considering themselves Moose’s closest friends) are planning on getting him another fish to join Stan and Countess EA. They’re very excited but also are very nervous about finding a good reputable breeder than will give them a healthy fish that won’t die and break Moose’s heart.