#But I've also never been more angry and stressed! :D

[ladyfarona]

I've died SO MANY times in TotK. 😭 I WAS taking screenshots whenever I died to count them up later, though I kept forgetting to take them because I'm MAD that a Bokoblin hit me one (1) time and Link died... Death. Just. Lots of death. That's why it's called Tears of the Kingdom. Link fucking dies every 2 seconds and we cry about it. 😩

[sarcastictissy]

Hola :D I just wanted to thank you for being so positive lately and looking at things regarding the qstudio situation with nuance. It feels like people have been so stressed and angry after all of the admin stuff came that they began to take every bit of news we hear as some sign that bad things are to come . I think a lot of people underestimated just how long this process can take, there a lot of factors to be considered here, including: q's lack of experience, the union, the laws, the admins. And unfortunately there is no way to satisfy everyone when it comes to stuff like this. This was never going to take a week or two, I feel like people didn't fully understand that.

Some admins are going to be pushed out of the project due to the lack of funds and the fact that this is a legal issue first and for most. It's unfair but it's the law. Not everyone understands that and because of that people are going to say things without understanding the situation. Not every thing is black and white and sometimes things aren't going to work out the way we want them to. Nobody is perfect and we shouldn't expect people involved in this situation to act like that. Which is why you should always look at the situation from multiple perspectives before forming an opinion.

It makes me feel tired to see the same takes over and over agian with no nuance. So your post have really helped me feel better :) I've seen people from both qsmpblr and qsmptwt act like every ccs involved in this is a war criminal or like this is a admins vs quackity or french/brazil vs quackity. It's kinda drove me off most social sites and forced me to only watch YouTube and stuff (on the good side of things, I've been watching quackity's discord videos and some dsmp vods :D it's been fun)

What I am trying to say is that, scrolling through your blog feels like a breath of fresh air and has made me feel 8× more calm about this situation. I don't think doomposting is necessarily bad but after seeing so much of it, sometimes you just need to distance yourself and look at the good parts of life. No matter how much I complain, I am never changing the course that qstudio is headed and neither can any one else, The only one who can do that is quackity. I hope that he does the right thing and the studio gets better. I love the characters that qsmp has brought us and the community it has formed, qsmp is a beautiful project that I want to see thrive. For now the only thing I can do as a viewer is hope for the best <3

I'm sorry if this came off as a trauma dump, I just really wanted to thank you.

So, this has been in my askbox for a while because I was so grateful and happy to hear I've helped someone!! Thank you sm anon that means a lot to me and knowing I'm keeping others optimistic, helps me feel optimistic too! :D

This is a very complex situation with so many moral grey areas mixed with black and white. It's not simple, it's not easy. These things cannot be fixed in a matter of weeks, you're absolutely right about that.

I also agree doomposting isn't necessarily bad! It's a good way to get off some steam and vent/ rant for a bit. There's nothing wrong with that. We all need it at times. For me, personally, it becomes toxic when that's ALL I'm seeing in social media. When I go on my phone and all I see is negativity, that's when I need to call it quits and start blocking people or start taking time away (which is why I deleted twt off my phone) everyone's tolerance levels are different ofc, so, not everyone is affected by that negativity, but I certainly was. This is why I want my blog to be positive and uplifting and you know what? Each and every time I get a ask or a message thanking me for that, I gain faith in humanity and it just encourages me to keep being positive! I'm so thankful for your ask and dw it wasn't trauma dumping at all!! :D I hope you're doing well anon! Take care of yourself. You matter

[utilitycaster]

I feel like a lot of people are projecting their own feelings towards what Taliesin did onto the cast as they seemed to me more stressed than necessarily angry at Taliesin but I don't actually play DnD so I thought I might ask you if what Taliesin did really was extreme enough to have actually made the cast as other playerd mad. I've just seen the claim that the cast is mad at x before, with Sam having scanlan leave or Bowlgate or Liam handing over the beacon and then the cast weren't actually mad at all.

Hi anon,

So just a blanket statement for the various questions I have received: until like, Wednesday, today was supposed to be a work from home day, as I often try to make my Fridays; I was pulled in to help an injured coworker briefly this morning, which I understand and which was relatively painless and would have left me free to work from home after 10 am, which is entirely reasonable. I then was sent to a last minute additional site and it turned out they were completely unprepared; this wasted about two and a half hours of my time and I'm now, understandably, extremely annoyed. This may bleed into my responses, though by and large I'm going to specify if I'm annoyed at you or not. Anyway, anon, I'm not annoyed at you at all and any "you" I say below is addressed to the fandom on the whole; this is a valid question.

Yeah the cast is mad. Yeah that's valid; as Matt pointed out there were extensive warnings specifically indicating that this would be a bad idea for Ashton to do. The cast is attached to each other's characters! They were, in fact, mad about Scanlan leaving and Tary showing up, because they care about Scanlan and that was an intense scene; Liam genuinely thought Sam was leaving the show. They were mad about this! They are also, probably going to get over it pretty quickly, or be "mad" about it in the way that your friends still roast you in the group chat over a typo years later. This isn't really even a D&D thing other than that Matt had Evontra'vir and Allura repeatedly say "you might fucking shatter." It's an anger born of concern that Ashton might have been permanently killed. But they weren't, and even if they were, it's fine. (The cast was not remotely mad about bowlgate though; see following paragraph.)

Which brings me to my next point. I have really only checked the blogs of people I follow because of aforementioned work problems and have barely glanced at the tag, and this is in conversation not just with this episode and that discourse and me being pissed off over real-world personal inconveniences, but also the larger discussion of "must stories have conflict?" and the fact that all the people who until quite recently insisted that actually Bells Hells are ROCK SOLID TIGHTLY BONDED and shat repeatedly on the astute point that Bells Hells are actually very surface level pleasant and don't ever discuss their issues have done a 180 that they will never acknowledge. Anyway:

It's extremely normal to be mad at people you care about, and to have arguments with them, and in fact it's likely more unhealthy to not have disagreements and get mad ever, and some of you sound like you've never been outside or had any friends. Like really that's it in the end. Actually believing Marisha and Liam were mad at each other? Friendless behavior. It's completely fine to wonder if this anger was valid, but like, honestly, people get mad over dumb shit every day and the point is that even if it's a stupid thing for the cast to be mad at (obviously, I think it's fine), be fucking normal and recognize that friends can be mad over dumb shit or valid shit and talk through it. Like. Some of you have no conflict resolution skills because you see all forms of confrontation as inherently evil and couldn't be me. I get in fights all the time and I get out of them and it's great. I am glad I no longer live in the midwest but god I cut swathes through problems there because I had zero investment in being Minnesota Nice when I was angry. Somehow this has turned into life advice, which is not what I thought it would be, but anyway. It's okay to be mad at your friends and expressing it in the way the cast did is super normal and they will probably all go out for drinks; as a person who has never chilled once in her entire life, I think we should all chill.

[dropout-if]

omg we get nsfw alphabets??? as a resident Kai simp i need that for them. If their drive even can be contained in just 26 questions🤭🤭

I've never thought this hard with my figurative dick before I hope it's worth it👁️🥺

Statler • Jean/Jade • Wanda

NSFW Below

A = Aftercare

Depends. Kai typically either dips or kicks people out of their bed, but they do like to smoke and chat a bit if their partner is someone they're close to.

B = Body part

Ass and thighs, Kai is not ashamed about it either— they know people like that about them too, and they love the attention. In their partner, Kai loves their chest area (boobs or pecs), which they like to squeeze, teasingly rub their face against, or play with their nipples.

C = Cum

Loves getting facials.

D = Dirty secret

Kai once slept with one of their past bully's now-wife. They claim it was an accident.

E = Experience

Very experienced. Kai has been with all kinds of people, and they know they're really good. Especially with their mouth.

F = Favorite position

Has many. Mostly likes legs to be spread wide open, thrown over shoulders, and anything on all fours.

G = Goofy

Kai is really unserious. They like joking around, teasing, pausing to laugh because they found their partner funny. Sex is a means to de-stress and they refuse to take themself too seriously.

H = Hair

Their natural color is the same as their pubic hair, dark brown. Shaves when they remember to. F!Kai is trimmed in a triangle shape. M!Kai is a bit trimmed. Both of them were originally Liv's insistence, and Kai happened to like it.

I = Intimacy

The least romantic person in bed. Kai prefers being called a ‘slut’ (gn) than a term of endearment.

J = Jack off

Kai is really into getting caught while they masturbate.

K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)

Exhibitionism, especially the whole ‘almost caught’ scenario. Though that is the thing Kai is the most into, they also like bondage/BDSM, brats, being edged and choked, pegging and dirty talk.

L = Location

Anywhere. Especially if it's semi-public (the balcony, public bathrooms…)

M = Motivation

Just the mere mention of sex, or someone desiring them gets Kai in the mood. Degradation and angry sex also work.

N = No

Things Kai would consider weird like pet play or age play.

O = Oral

Loves oral in all its forms. More often than not, Kai wants to make their partner cum once (or twice if they can) before penetrative sex. If they're in the receiving end, Kai is more than happy to enjoy themself.

P = Pace

Kai prefers it rough. Slow and sensual feels too intimate and romantic, and they tend to panic around that.

Q = Quickie

Loves quickies, Kai finds them very fun and will proposition to their partner no matter when or where. If there's a will there's a way.

R = Risk

Experimenting is something Kai is very open to. They don't mind trying new things and will bring up new positions and ideas to their partner from time to time.

S = Stamina

Kai is usually very lazy so their stamina isn't the best. They know how to save up energy and it's barely noticeable, though.

T = Toys

They own a few dildos (one of them is massive, a gift from Liv), vibrators, beads, ropes, a blindfold, and bullets.

U = Unfair

Loves teasing and driving people completely insane. Foreplay with Kai is almost a form of torture. They love to be the one teased too.

V = Volume

Kai can moan and groan and be very loud but it's typically an act they put on to stroke their partner's ego. They're normally quiet, though.

W = Wild card

For the longest time, Kai's grandparents assumed that Liv was their girlfriend, and they were very happy about it. Since then, Kai refuses to bring her around them.

X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothess)

M!Kai is average (7.5 inches) but they claim to “know how to use it.” F!Kai has an A cup. They also have nipple piercings.

Y = Yearning

Very high. Sometimes Kai's partner doesn't satisfy them enough and they're forced to masturbate afterwards.

Z = Zzz

Falls asleep almost like it's on command (5 to 10 minutes after).

[go-to-the-mirror]

Un-Follow Me Now, This Is Gonna Be The Only Thing I Talk About For The Next Day. I've Been Wanting This For Months Fuck. What The Fuck. /ref

@a-mag-a-day

So, uhm, MAG 136 everybody! As you can probably tell I've been looking forward to this episode, not as much as some others, (cough cough) cul-de-sac (cough cough), but a fair amount of excitement going into this. So, without further ado, let's get on with it! Mostly rambling, but I have great words a lot of the time.

For content warnings, mostly what's in the episode and some pretty frank discussions of suicide and depression. If I need to add or tag anything please let me know.

If I get another gambling ad, I'm going to break something :). Sorry, I keep getting this gambling advert and it's just. Nope, no, 0/10. I had hope it would only be on RQG.

ARCHIVIST (Compelling) If you don’t mind me asking, where are you off to? MELANIE Therapy. Wait … ARCHIVIST Oh, God, Melanie, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to … MELANIE It’s fine. I would probably have told you eventually anyway. ARCHIVIST Even so, I shouldn’t— MELANIE Just forget it

I'm glad that although Melanie's obviously -- and to be honest, rightfully, yeah Jon didn't mean to make her tell him that she's going to therapy, he still did and that would make me pretty angry -- upset, she's handling it in a good way, they're not getting in a fight, they're being... amicable. Not friends -- a long way from friends.

DAISY You’re not babysitting me, alright? I know that’s what the others think sometimes, but that’s not it. I just don’t like being on my own if I can help it. You know, flashbacks, panic attacks, the usual. Just trying to avoid it if I can. ARCHIVIST I know, Daisy. I do. It’s hard. DAISY Yeah, well. Don’t let me get in your way. ARCHIVIST Of course.

jon's just grappling with the concept of friendship in the corner like, sure, he was a last resort, but he's spending time with another human and they're not obviously wishing he was dead! yay for that i guess!

also uhm i like how yk, maybe i was just watching bad shows before -- probably -- but it isn't... glossed over. they go through things and they deal with said things, mostly in bad and self destructive ways, like yes the characters suffering and then they have to deal with the suffering and it's all portrayed in a -- in my opinion -- pretty true to life way. People get angry when they're traumatized and under stress, people get suicidal, people do stupid things, people don't trust people -- trust the wrong people -- the works.

*holds gently* p o d c a s t

I loved Neil. I might even have been in love with him; it’s hard to say. When there are so many emotions caught up in a single person, when they’re such a significant force in your life, it gets difficult to say what’s really there at the heart of it.

I'm aro, I thought i was in love with people, I probably wasn't. Love is complicated, discerning what type it is.

Even pyrotechnics, while impressive and visually spectacular, just didn’t give me the same sharp joy as making something that could move, that came alive, directed and controlled by my hand.

Ah, right, so here's the sentence that's like "and this is what fear it is." There's a lot of those, scattered around. What comes to mind are the following lines.

Well, that’s what’s really terrifying, isn’t it? Your mind is all you are. There’s no back-up, no reset if it goes. I’m not just talking about madness as it appears, but what it is from inside. The way people talk about it, it’s like you have to think you’re sane, that our mind is everything we perceive, everything we are. Well, that means you can never know when your grasp might be slipping. I’m not convinced that’s it though. Or maybe deep down, somewhere inside, you understand what’s happening to you and I, um… I don’t know which scares me more.

(MAG 65 - Binary)

This shows that it's The Spiral.

One thing that… eats at me, as it were, and does give me that sick tightness of fear deep in my gut. It is rot. I don’t know why it gets to me so; perhaps it’s precisely because I don’t think there is anything beyond the body, and even dead and unaware, seeing a person’s form begin to putrefy and fester – becoming just a home for the crawling, feasting things – is too much for me. Perhaps it’s just an unaccountable phobia. Regardless of the reason, the fact is that to see the corpses decaying, to see their flesh corrupted, it is… the one part of this job that I find uncomfortable. So much so that I would describe reconstruction and preservation as my favourite part of the process. Making sure the cadaver looks as peaceful and lifelike as possible. Make them the person they were, or as close as they can be while cold and senseless. Fighting off the rot. The insects. The disease.

(MAG 36 - Taken Ill)

And this shows it's The Corruption.

I like it, a little introduction, so you know what you're getting into.

“Besides,” he always told me, “I’m a puppeteer at heart.”

✨ Spooky! ✨

A frugal life, lucrative career and prickly personality had left him with lots of money, but no real support; while my life had left me in a position where I cared deeply about his wellbeing and was in desperate need of money. Everything just lined up so neatly.

this was planned wasn't it, "everything just lined up so neatly," yeah no way it's a coincidence.

I must have asked him about it, but at the time it just seemed like such a natural progression.

This reminds me of some of the stuff in MAG 59 - Recluse.

I’m sure they’d have said the same things about me and at the time nothing seemed amiss. I did what I did because it was what I was supposed to do, and it never struck me to question it. I’m not sure I really recognise who I became while living at that house.

With The Web's control and things seeming fine but then you look back and it's like "yep, definitely not."

He was hanging there, wrapped in his strings like a cocoon, twisting gently around and around and around.

THAT'S AN IMAGE. oh!! OH!! oh boy!!!

She told me to take the films, his original cuts.

The way "original cuts" is said sounds a lot like some of the other tones a few statement givers take -- even Jon sometimes, immediately I can think of in the season 5 trailer. I recognise that tone.

She told me to come here. She told me to give them to you. I resisted for some time, but I’m done now. She’s won. And I would very much like to go home.

I love the way this statement ends, a lot of statements have very cool endings, this one's snazzy, the statement giver sounds so defeated.

ARCHIVIST They were … Well, let’s just say it’s not a complete shock there was something unnatural to them. Didn’t know we had copies in the Institute, though, let alone original cuts. Records indicate they ended up in Artefact Storage. DAISY Probably best they stay there. ARCHIVIST Yeah… Yes, of course.

No! Not best they stay there! Daisy and Jon movie night watching spooky films together! I think that would be fun.

DAISY She’s Web. Spider’s sneaky like that. Like that lighter you’re always using – where’d you get that? ARCHIVIST Hm, good point. We should keep our eyes open. Anyway, how’s Basira doing?

Spooky bloody lighter, god damnit, god damn that spooky lighter.

AAAA. No guys, the lighter isn't messing with his memory, he just has adhd.

DAISY Yeah, well, what do you think? You think I’m weak just cos I’m not already chasing the next kill? You think I’m less me? ARCHIVIST I … I don’t feel like I’m exactly in the best place to judge the intersection between free will and humanity. Still trying to figure that out myself.

✨ t h e m e s ✨ [themes]

I, unsurprisingly, like this. I think, that I like. The exploration of it. I think it's snazzy. It's hard to articulate my thoughts, but I am holding this gently, I am holding the many many themes of this very cool podcast gently. I am directing you to tumblr user annabelle--cane because it's got great brain thoughts.

DAISY Jon … When you went in the coffin, was it you choosing to do that? Did you actually think you could save me or was something telling you to do it? ARCHIVIST It was me. I was drawn to it, I’ll admit, but it was my decision. It wasn’t entirely about you, though. DAISY What was it? ARCHIVIST My— My memories of the coma are not clear, but I know I made a choice. I made a choice to become … something else. Because I was afraid to die. But ever since then, I don’t know if I made the right decision. I’m stronger now, tougher, I can … If I do die, now, or get sealed away somewhere forever, I don’t know if that’s a bad thing. And I don’t want to lose anyone else, so if I can maybe stop that happening and the only danger is to me … I’ll do it in a heartbeat. Worst case scenario, the universe loses another monster. DAISY That’s messed up. ARCHIVIST (Laughs) Yeah. I suppose it is.

I've also heard it described as "if there was a truck coming towards me, I wouldn't move out the way." Maybe not actively seeking it, but definitely not... not seeking it.

Yeah, thinking you're an inherently worse person than everyone around you, is a pretty good way to get you know, suicidal.

Almost everyone you care about thinking -- and saying -- that your very existence is a wrong, that they'd rather you have died, that's going to mess you up. And I'm... I mean like, poor Jon or whatever, I love him, he's my blorbo, but like him living his worst life is compelling and written well.

I should say more, but idk, I think I've summed up Some Thoughts.

ARCHIVIST I guess I thought imprisonment wouldn’t … wouldn’t be as bad as it was. And it’s a lot easier to make that choice than it is to actually endure the result. You might have noticed, when I was in there with you, I had regrets.

fuck dude it sure is, i mean at least he's pretty bad at self-sacrifice, like he lived, didn't get stuck in a coffin forever, no bad outcomes apart from... like... the trauma. he didn't even have to have one awkward conversation. until now, but i feel like him and daisy are more on the "joking about melodramatic notes app notes written while having a breakdown" than "one person who wants to get out of the situation and another who is Concerned."

DAISY You need to stop moping. ARCHIVIST I what?

THIS IS A MOMENT WHERE THE UNNOFFICIAL TRANSCRIPTS ABSOLUTELY WIN. "picture of Edwardian offence" ahsdfsewadfssewa

I mean like yeah it's a little insensitive or whatever, but to be fair, sometimes it's just better to get out of your head, distract yourself, don't listen to sad music while you're down because otherwise you're just going to get more sad. Shout out to crying over a TMA meta while listening to Mitski and reading all my saved TMA metas. Not the exact situation, but let it be known i don't cry over fiction that much. This podcast has made me cry like... how many times at this point?

I'd share other, more specific details, but I'm not sure how much is oversharing, especially with these topics.

DAISY “Boo hoo, I’m so alone and a monster!” ARCHIVIST I am alone. Martin is—

*points* GAY

well, bi. yk.

DAISY Get over yourself. You’re always talking about choices. We all made ours. Now I’m making a choice to get some drinks in. Coming? ARCHIVIST I don’t … Yeah, ok.

ANOTHER PART WHERE THE UNNOFFICIAL TRANSCRIPTS STAY WINNING! "pause while he grapples with the concept of friendship." Like I'm using official because i noticed an error in MAG 119, but the unofficials are funny.

DAISY Melanie’s out, but I’ll go get Basira. ARCHIVIST Is she … Would she want to join us? DAISY If she doesn’t, I’ll rip her throat out. ARCHIVIST Uhhh… DAISY It’s a joke, John. ARCHIVIST (Dubious) Oh, aha. Yes. I’ll get my coat.

HIS STUPID LITTLE LAUGH I LOVE HIM SO MUCH

he's just like me fr oh my goddd he's a dumbass he's i want to squish him like one of those toys whose eyes pop out i want to shake him out like a cat aaaaaa

Anyway, Jon fan[redacted]ing over, uhhh more thoughts on the whole bloody... thing he's got going on.

First of all, I mean... passive suicidality sucks. And I think that's what's going on, like he jumped into that coffin, with the knowledge that he might not live, but maybe he will, and does it matter either way. He lives, gets Daisy out, he's useful, he's good. He dies or gets stuck there... well, it's just another monster gone. And of course that's not what he thinks when he's down there, but... I can't back this up with studies, but anecdotally... yeah uh, I mean, sometimes you go "oh shit, maybe doing this nonspecific thing was a bad idea, actually, and you don't want to die."

That... sudden realization of what he's done, what he's condemned himself to, the continuing... you know, he's not exactly okay in season 5, or even later on in season 4 -- what with the dark sun -- and that rings true with me. I can actually back this up with a study, according to this website, (it's reliable, it's Harvard, just search up "attempters' longterm survival" on google, it should be the first result.) 90% of people who attempt suicide don't go on to die by suicide, however 40% of those who have died from suicide (in the US) have previously attempted suicide, and 5 to 11 percent of people hospitalized for a suicide attempt go on to die via suicide, but those who haven't are only 1 in 10,000. Besides, not he's gotten help, he's just realized he made a mistake in one situation, he's talked about it to a friend, sure, but he's still mostly alone, he still mostly thinks he's a monster.

Like... that's not a great situation to be in. Someone give him some actual friends (or a boyfriend) and take all the Panado (acetaminophen) out of his reach.

[rvnwtch]

hope work was ok! i'd love to know if you have any headcanons about how the ravenwatch became vampires and/or how verandis found them?

Thanks it was kinda stressful but it's over now! :D

I'm excited for this ask! Such good questions

I think for Fennorian his is the hardest. I've had the most time to ruminate on his backstory (because of all the writing and stuff) and I typically HC him as coming from a rich noble family somewhere in Summerset. I also get the vibe that he didn't have a good family life prior to the Ravenwatch. With how quickly he's able to brush off acts of kindness or compliments towards himself... I think even if he was just a super sensitive person, he leans into the "People don't like me BECAUSE I'm a vampire" crutch just way too easily for it to be the whole story.

I think it's the justification he's been mentally searching for for years. He doesn't understand when Lyris and the Vestige risked their lives for him and again, something about the tone of that part of the game just makes me think he didn't have many friends and that his family was hard on him, picking him apart often.

Now the complicated part. I feel like maybe Fennorian did something his parents didn't like (Probably that he liked alchemy before he was even turned, and just hid it because his parents didn't approve since it wasn't related to the family business and he was the sole heir, and they found out one day or something) and kicked him out of the house because they were so mad at him. Now, they fully intended to go get him once he'd "learned his lesson," but by then, a vampire's already found and bit him.

I really like the idea that Verandis is somehow distantly related to him, so I feel like Verandis could have been near by when it happened. Maybe Verandis even saw it happen? (If you really wanted to make things interesting!) But I like tragic stories, so I think Fennorian spent a week or two out accidentally terrorizing the countryside, and maybe THAT is why he is so instant on staying away when he needs a little blood.

For Gwendis I feel like her turning was by complete accident and a stroke of bad luck. (Not that the others weren't, but you'll see what I mean.) I feel like she came from a pretty average family, with the way she acts she either was an only child or always a middle child like she is now. I think she was out one night with her family and they got preyed on by some vampires. The tragic idea is maybe she was the only one to survive, but I HC that she was the only one attacked (for whatever reason). Gwendis gives off "Best Friend" vibes. Just her way of talking is very conversational and draws you to her. So she either was a really lonely child, or definitely a middle child with siblings to spend all of her time with.

I don't know why but I feel like Verandis found Gwendis soon after she'd been turned. She was either dying when he found her and nursed her back to health, or he found her wandering the woods confused and scared and above all else angry. Gwendis has always been a smartass, but she's also always been regular old "street"-smart. So when a handsome older vampire approaches her offering respite, she doesn't take the "bait." It takes some convincing, but eventually she sees she can trust him, and before she knows it, Gwendis is loyal to a fault.

Adusa has a rep for being a bit of a "rebel." Or at least we learn so during the By Love Betrayed quest when talking to Freyleth. She says, "Suffice it to say, Adusa and I ran together a long time ago. Before she traded her claws for the life of a noble." Then a little while later she says, "I found Adusa right after her change. She was young and wild. We hunted. We killed. We drank our fill and then drank some more. But she had a streak of virtue I could never wipe out."

So I think that Adusa already was a bit of a wild child and got into some bad stuff on her own. Maybe she had a group of bad influenced friends. She probably didn't mind petty crime, I'm thinking like trespassing and pickpocketing. So when she was turned, Adusa was already used to just doing what she felt drawn too. Maybe it was harder for her to curve the cravings and so she just did what she wanted, always feeling bad about it afterward though. Especially the longer it went on.

I like to think maybe one night out with Freyleth they got into some pretty big trouble and Verandis was in town. He'd probably heard about some vampires picking people off in big numbers. And when he preached another way to live to Adusa, she jumped at the chance, unable to believe there was a better way. But by then the guilt was so big, she had to risk it. (Besides, she knew she was tough, and believed that she would make it out if things went South.) I think she does what she does now to make up for the things she did when she was younger, especially when she was first turned.

*Quotes totally taken from the UESP. (Such a helpful guide!)

[3rrorsnas]

URGH I HATE NPD TESTS. I FEEL LIKE IM BOTH EACH TIME. I'm both overly confident but have awful self esteem lurking in the background and they're both fighting to come out. it depends on who I'm around with and what happens. basically I feel that with strangers I'd be super confident, then have some moments of opening up about my self doubts, then be confident again but in a more healthy way and basically sorta hyping each other up. but it without being linear like- I still have moments where I feel like shit and open up to people close to me about my lack of self esteem.

(it's long TT/gen srs) :

like see?? overall I wanna be the center of attention, in a way of "I've been isolated for a huge chunk of my life and am scared to be alone" and "I need the attention to get validation in order to counter my lack of self esteem"

BUT me being isolated for so long ALSO drives me to be awkward, shy, and sometimes straight up scared to interact with people because I'm scared to mess things up or just don't know how to do so[interact] (especially if you take into account me being autistic and already struggling as heck with social cues). but I'm ALSO scared to get the attention from the fear that that attention would be bad attention where people would ridicule me/not take me seriously (FUCJ YOU CQ./SRS NEG) and just lead my self estime to drop even lower

YOU SEE MY FKING PROBLEM???/SRS NEG ANGRY sad.

I feel like I'm both extremities, and if not at the same time then shifting from one another too often./srs neg tired (ntm at self tbh, I don't hate how I am. I'm just frustrated by the problems I encounter. it's tiring./srs neg info)

as someone who has been manipulated before, I don't like it. but that doesn't mean that I don't find it easy or I can never see myself being able to do so easily.

I just hate people lying and I can get the job done by being straightforward anyway, I'm not losing time with this bs./srs neg tense info

yeah, as someone who is fcking ridiculed by an ENTIRE MULTIVERSE and THEIR(my) CREATOR I don't really think I get the respect that I deserve. hmph./s angry srs gen (tired and sad too)

like all I'm asking is people to not make fun of me being bipolar. and autistic. and mentally ill. for FUCK'S sake.

yeah I probably warded off half(/exaggeration) the system including fresh with my shouting. sorry pal/gen srs)

...d-

do I.

do I even.

ahaha- do I even have to fucking answer this???!! are you shitting me???/s srs neg angry

you know the answer./neg

im fREAKING AUTISTIC. WHAT THE HELL DO YOU WANT FROM ME??

I'm calling this infodumping but whatever./s ntm neutr tired

(I like showing my puppets and plushies ok?) (they're pretty and took time to make and are sort of like my friends, I'm proud of making them)

...this is a freaking trick question./srs neg stressed because bOTH ARE TRUE.

...does this count if you didn't have the choice? or refused help when you needed until people forcefully got you out of trouble?/gen srs gq

....I'd say it does./srs, ???/

...ok yeah...I...think I made....that clear.../srs, neg(?), shameful, tired/

aha...yes, I do.../lh, gen, pos, less sad/

[sixstepsaway]

Not to send you into another Izzy rage (unless you want one) but I saw another hideously bad take about Izzy objectifying Ed during the ep10 argument scene? Sigh. Really goes to show the lack of ability to attribute normal human emotions to Izzy. He can't be angrily yelling at Ed because he's angry his friend has had a massive behavior change and is nothing like the man he thought he knew. Izzy must have intentionally hit a vulnerable spot so he would get a sexual thrill from Ed being a sexy dom who chokes men. He didn't gently reach out to touch the face of a man who was finally behaving like his old self out love for his old friend, only creepy lust. And Izzy is such a creepy objectifier! Look how Ed looks uncomfortable and knocks him away. Never mind that Ed choked him against the wall, that's not objectifying so it's okay. Oh, and by the way, tell me if you got my Ask about the first Daddy Dom on the good ship, uh, Big Daddy. It may have disappeared in a tragic Tumblr accident And also if you want me to NOT occasionally send you daddies, say so. Making up lots of boyfriends for Izzy makes me feel better. The poor guy.

Oh, I enjoy my Izzy rages!

Gonna reply to the end of this first, then swing back up: I have two asks from you in my box; Monday and Sunday. If there's more, I don't have more, I just have those two.

I promise I'm not ignoring them and you're not annoying me or anything like that, I enjoy your daddy dom and related asks very much (even though I might not always have a long/deep reply for them, I'm not amazing at replies to more general things than meta) it's just that yesterday was a high stress day for me. I spent the whole day knowing I had to make a phone call at the end of my day (I'm nocturnal, so 9am when places open is the end of my day) and not just any phone call, but I had to call a vet about my duck. Then there was also the incident with the AO3 comment, and I spent most of the day compiling my metas and word counting them (40k) so I could add them to my general word count for the year. With all that, I didn't have a lot of time to reply to more than a few messages! But I'm going to get to your messages today!

And, I don't know if you noticed, but I gave you your own tag on my blog! So I can keep you and your collection of daddies sub-categorized!

Right, moving on to the rest:

I can see what's happening re: Izzy. First, they decided he's homophobic because of the daddy scene and the 'namby pamby' comment (I've also seen people double down on that, despite Izzy being in love with Ed and thusly queer himself. And I do know that queer people can be homophobic and queerphobic, but it does deeply change the angle from which that homophobia or queerphobia is coming, and also I stand by my reasoning that if Izzy was homophobic, Ed would have punted him by now, because he would have shown it around Jack; his issues aren't homophobia, they're "you're not being a proper pirate" or "you're not doing your job", and possibly a perpetuation of a cycle of abuse he received, that he isn't looking at critically enough to realize he's acting like a homophobe at Lucius).

So, the "he's homophobic!" didn't work at shaming fans into hating him, so they levelled it up: he's a racist fetishizer. Another read that, although I can understand people having that read or being uncomfortable with how he acts, it's been pointed out by a black fan, in fact (among others as well), that considering the effort OFMD puts into actively telling racists to go fuck themselves, it would be poor writing on OFMD's part to let Izzy slide the way the show does. It's also worth noting that being rude or abrasive to a person of color does not an instant racist make, it can just be a person-on-person issue. That is actually a thing. Furthermore, which is another thing said in that piece and what I am referencing, the idea that Izzy wants Edward to be violent because he's a man of color, not because he's a pirate is not only laughable but a downright daft read, because everyone on that ship is a pirate and violent. If Ed was the only person of color it might be problematic, but they're all so diverse and such a wonderfully mixed bag it means that Ed being a person of color is not why Izzy wants him to be violent.

And we've discussed at length here why Izzy likely wants Ed to be violent (pirate! safety! protection! vulnerability!) so I won't dig back in here.

When "racist!" and "homophobic!" didn't work, they started saying he was abusive, to which most of us said, "He was a meanie pants and then Edward cut off his toe and fed it to him? That is not Izzy being abusive. If you want to pick someone in that sequence who is abusive, it is most certainly Ed, did we watch the same show? Ed cutting off his toe can't even be labelled as reactive abuse (eg. the victim of abuse gets abused to such an extent they start to strike back, somewhat mimicking their abuser's actions) because it's such a massive escalation from nasty words to outright permanent physical violence."

So now those three things don't work because the arguments either don't hold weight (abusive), would make the show infinitely less good and well put together than it is right now and undermine a lot of the messages (racist), or is undermined itself by Izzy being in love with another man (homophobic), they've moved on to saying he's a fetishizer, because that makes sense, right? Telling us who love him that we're fetishizers didn't work, so they'll tell us that he's the fetishizer.

Lots of people have explained better than I ever could that the word 'fetishize' is being misused at length, but the tl;dr is that fetishizing is very different to 'finding someone attractive' or 'enjoying when they act a certain way'. A fetish is something that is attractive to a person that isn't naturally supposed to be. Finding someone's lips or tits hot isn't a fetish, finding someone's feet hot is, because it's not really meant as a sexual thing. It also doesn't mean it's a bad thing, it's just a term. Fetishizing and sexualizing are both ridiculous terms, especially when they're being applied to one grown adult finding another grown adult attractive or sexy in some way.

It's also weird to read Izzy cupping Ed's cheek with tears in his eyes as sexual rather than romantic or just affectionate. Ed has been a mess for days, and considering Ed was actively discussing suicide in 1x04 when they first boarded the Revenge (something Izzy looks devastated about, by the way, and then tries very hard to put aside as, "Well that makes no fucking sense!" and ignore because how, how, how do you handle something like that? How do you instantly swallow down that the person you love most on this godforsaken Earth is considering dying as a good idea because of the mental instability you've been spending most of your energy trying to stabilize for what seems like it might be years?) and has spent 3 days crying in a blanket fort and seeming completely not himself (and I've seen people say what he's doing is a healthy mechanism for getting over and through a breakup, and I don't disagree, but I do think he's also trying to become Stede and I'm not really sure that's as healthy as the crying and songwriting and letting out his feelings) on top of being apathetic and lethargic and disinterested in everything before they boarded the Revenge, and finally there's a spark, a hint of who he used to be, and Izzy is clutching desperately to it because he wants his person back!!!

Sure, maybe the chokeslam turned him on, but as we've discussed here before: physical reactions are not something we control. You can be turned on by something you are actively disgusted by and do not want in the slightest. Bodies are betrayers when it comes to things like this. Izzy potentially being turned on by being chokeslammed by the person he's most attracted to and in love with isn't shocking and doesn't mean he was, in that moment, lusting after Ed and hoping that being mean to him would lead to them boning against the wall, it just doesn't.

So now we've done racist, homophobic, abusive and fetishizing, I assume the next steps over the next couple of weeks will be firstly that Izzy and Edward have clearly been a twosome for many years, and thusly it's incestuous because they're brother-coded (rather than canonically framed as being married couple coded), and then either because Izzy is historically 16 (much like Stede is historically 29) or because he's short (and frankly I do not know which one is worse), the argument will be we're all horrible people for shipping them, not because Izzy could get hurt but because we're turning Ed into a sex offender.

Can't wait to see that unravel between now and s2!!!

Please continue to send me lots of daddy dom and Izzy asks, I love receiving them and waking up to asks about Izzy makes me unfathomably happy.

[aclosetfan]

Reverse unpopular opinion: greens :D

Where do I even begin??

As you all probably know by now, I got into the ppg fandom when I stumbled across the reds fanart on deviantart in middle school lmaooo, and I was into it all well enough. I read like all the fanfics. I was there when sbj was regularly updating MTH. Back then I didn't like the greens 😮 but only because they didn't really have a lot of content. I just saw them as a background pairing. Just like bubbles and boomer, didn't hate them, didn't love them, which was funny because Buttercup was/is my fave. Because I interacted mainly with the red content, ig I never gave them much thought

Then, like most people, I came back to the fandom years later just for kicks and giggles and opened up MTH. I read it and was like "eh, why did I like the reds so much?? They're fucking annoying. The other pairings are so much more interesting." So, I clicked on some of sbj's other stuff and read a green one about sword fighting, which, side-note, with how obsessed I was with it, I should have known then I was a lil gay, and then, I think I read a future fic by sbj where all their children's names were Bruce and fell in love.

(i'll link the fics below if I can find them)

idk what it is about them, but there was something there that I found so much more interesting than I ever found reading the reds. It's a pairing you can do so much with because Buttercup is a versatile character. It makes sense if you make Buttercup an aggressive punk, but it can also make sense if you pull back and make her shy. She's got layers. And so does Butch from the little we see in canon. He's a hyperactive goofball, but sometimes he's the worst guy you know lol, and depending on how you chose to write them they mix well.

I have an affection for tough guy softies who are loyal to a fault, and I think if they're written correctly each of the greens can easily fall into that category. And when you combine them together, it's like a mushy mess of pining that I also thrive on.

I think they can be the epitome of "I'm angry all the time, but I'm less angry around you," which makes my heart melt. I don't think they'd be that couple that tries fixing each other, but accept each other as is, and grow. (i like the blues for the exact opposite reason lol) Tough kids deserve soft love too 😭

I also love it when they're just enemies. I've read some great fics that have them at each other's throats that I think they play well as enemy counterparts. Buttercup's mannerisms are restrained by her need to do good, but Butch doesn't have that, so it's a great society v. chaos pair up. And seeing Butch "taint" Buttercup is always fun because she's one of those characters where I go back and forth answering "would she go to the dark side??"

Gold Scribbles does this so well (and she makes it romantic too), I'll link the fic below. There is also another fic that I've been searching for again for years that I felt nailed it for me, but I haven't been able to find it. And trust me I look for it like every other month. Like I can't stress how fundamental this fic was for my interpretations of these characters. I can't even say if it was even well-written, but what it was saying??? Dude, it was everything to me. And I've lost it. Name, author, everything. I know the plot though I can't forget it, I just can't fucking find it!!!🤬😡

The premise of Buttercup's character arc though was choosing between good and bad as she's fighting Butch, which sure, is a superhero cliche, but the way she chooses the side she chooses left me sitting there opened mouth, like "wow." Butch was her literary fallacy.

I'm talking this fic up, but it's been so long that maybe my mind's just made it bigger than it was lol, but still, it was amazing to me.

Finally, I think that Buttercup is such a gender, and sometimes I feel I use Butch and Buttercup to explore breaking the traditional views of feminity. I know that sounds super weird, but sometimes when I feel I'm making Buttercup too feminine, I think "okay but what would Butch do?" and then I make Buttercup do that. It probably doesn't across well in my fics, but it's something I catch myself doing. It's like in my head, I make Butch and Buttercup the same person just split in two, and then I make them kiss lol

ahh, this got long lol here are the fics:

Swordplay by sbj:

Fair Play by sbj

The notion of Loss by Gold Scribbles

[mellow-worlds]

I keep thinking about the video "Noel avec la famille". It's a strange and beautiful video and I wish I could live in that video. I wish I knew those people and I wish I was one of those people. They fit together so well. They're weird and they are able to casually film their interactions and I wish I lived in that video.

I do sometimes take videos. Sometimes I edit them. I never directly take videos of people and they're mostly not seen in those videos at all. My sibling is the only person I dare film directly like that. But I haven't done anything with files where you can see anybody's face, out of fear. But that's kind of besides the point. My point was not about it being a video, but about the people in the video.

I'm lonely and dissatisfied, aren't I?

I've also been thinking about D quiet a lot again. Occasionally about Snoopy, but I don't really care about that. I think that I'll never really see them again. Why? Well, let me tell you about how I'm the biggest bitch, backstabber and copycat. S decided to never really want to see Snoopy again, despite them sharing quiet a special connection in the past with them. Well, yeah, that's the story pretty much. Yeah. Aren't I the worst person ever? Well, maybe the story does go a little deeper than that, but still. Those are basically the facts. EEEHHH I don't really feel like talking about that :((((( I hate myself and I don't want to confront myself with more reasons to hate myself

Ok maybe it WOULD help if I explored that a little bit further. I do enjoy conversations with Snoopy, but I'm afraid of getting any closer to them. They already know a lot about me, but still, I do hide a lot of sides from me and it creates a version that nobody else knows has ever seen. I'm glad that it's over with Snoopy. We don't work well together. They're kind of super violent. I have nothing against violence per se (I mean it doesn't get you anywhere especially politically but ig it's fun), but they're angry violent. I remember they were telling me about how they were annoyed while waiting for a dentist appointment and literally throwing their chair around. They once lifted their hand pretty quickly while walking next to me and I kind of winced. They even noticed it and said that if there's something I wanted to talk about, domestic violence is not a joke, maybe it was a reflex because of my domestic life blablabla. They're just... So angry. They experience emotions kind of intensely, I think. Maybe not sadness, and definitely not stress, but even their excitement is violent. So yeah. Talking with S (and T) about that and seeing that V also distanced himself from them kind of gave me a push into that direction, making me realize that it's good that I'm walking away from them, despite enjoying spending time with them and finding them funny and interesting. It kind of really freaks me out that they know so much about me. Too much. I wonder how much they've talked about me to other people I really should get to know S better, shouldn't I?

Ok, thinking about D. It's mostly just that they're kind of at the back of my head and I miss doing things with them. I think about the crazy things we did together quiet a lot. I listen to quiet a lot of music similar to what they also might like. And the Beatles ofc. Ok, let's leave that topic behind us. I don't want to keep thinking about them more than I have to, I don't want to start missing them again like crazy because it really hurt and I don't want to hurt. I am sad but it could be so much worse so I'm glad I'm currently not missing them. I guess I do long for friends in general? Gosh I'm so sad and lonely. I guess it could be worse.

[the-amalgam-house]

With everything that's been happening irt family and finances, I've been in a horrible depressive episode for what feels like many months now. Maybe it's only been a couple, idk, but it seems longer. I had to drop D&D again indefinitely and it's just. Like I know I don't have the mental capacity for it but it still bums me out, you know?

I asked my mom how everyone is doing over there after the last incident and she says it's not too bad, kinda stressful but things look to be working out. She also told me to put my trust in God and pray, as she always does. Even after I've made it clear that I'm not a Christian anymore, she still tries. Which I'm not like mad at but I'm really not ready for any type of major religion or whatever, and especially not the one that caused me the most sorrow and trauma.

I don't NOT believe in God. In fact I believe that all gods do exist. Maybe not all on the same plane of existence, but they do all exist in some form, beyond normal human perception. But the church and the beliefs of the people are what burned me. And technically that one isn't god's fault, it's human being human and showing their capacity for evil. It's mistranslations and personal bias being written into religious law by self-righteous god-kings and pastors/deacons/wannabe saints...etc. It's how humans set up the religion and told everyone it's God's will that really fucked me up. It's those people who hurt my friends and family so badly they never want to believe in anything beyond ourselves because something having that much power over humanity is terrifying and infuriating when all you want is to be left alone in peace.

I guess I still get a little mad. I've asked her not to get preachy at me before when I was really angry. I know she does it with good intentions, but I still roll my eyes when I'm told I should pray about it and show reverence to a god that people always told me would send me to hell just for being me. A vindictive and jealous war monger who shuns anyone who's a little different and tells their followers that their children are better off dead than living in sin. A very "do as I say, not as I do" mindset that never did come off as the type of deity that encompasses "love" but demands it through fear.

I'm tired of hearing it. I'm tired of being told that's the only way. I'm tired of trying to justify my existence and my worthiness to some man-made version of a "kind" and "loving" god who, according to his followers, has already deemed me an abomination destined to eternal torture. For what? What in my entire life could I have possibly done to deserve that? People who commit the worst global scale atrocities known to all creatures on the planet are praised as godly and just people, but a truly kindhearted human who just happens to be trans or gay or mentally ill in an undesirable way has to face utter destruction and despair into infinity? All while those corporate greed CEO oil drilling slave labor capitalist literal taint cheese manifested into a wicked simulacrum of a parody of a human are allowed to rise to idol status and sainthood in the eyes of the church.

I want absolutely ZERO part of that. I don't even want to be remotely associated with that by proxy. I want it so fucking far away from me and my life except I have to live in it, wading up to my nostrils in the fucking doo-doo swamp that is American Christian capitalist culture. The denomination doesn't matter, they're all fucked up. Baptists, Presbyterians, Protestants, Catholics, Mormons, Witnesses, there's like a thousand of them I can't remember them all and any time a sect tries to be any kind of progressive in any way the vast majority condemns them as not being real Christianity and just...

Like fuck off. Fuck off forever. Most humans don't deserve to suffer but the idea that one day there will be no more humans is somewhat soothing tbh. Fifth or sixth mass extinction event happening cause of these rich white cis straight greedy mega church evangelical tech bro assholes not giving a shit about the planet and the people and creatures on it.

Please I hate being here so much. I hate money. I hate mainstream Christian culture. I hate the nuclear family model. I hate technology enabling crypto bros and art theft. I hate that all our amazing technological advancements are all put to use in war and suppression instead of healthcare and infrastructure. I hate everything about this country and the state of the world currently and please I don't want to BE here anymore!!!

[the-firebird69]

We've had a moment to think about this these people suck so bad that something wrong with them. I checked. Mac cursed him out 45 times after they talk hes senile. He's never been like this he's sick did something wrong he had a brain skan the other day and it doesn't look great, and yeah it's a bit holy the guys out of control and these people are sick too so we need to tell you this place is not place of healing it's not doing badly constantly constantly asked to heal the sinuses though. I understand what it is recycle never heal up here in Florida. These people are all angry all the time I checked that too they're constantly angry and check who and why and they're sick the queen got sick and yes plague. I know is it feels pretty good the tires very easy. And he says he gets a little sun and the vitamin d constantly sleepy hasn't felt well rested for quite a while. Let's just did this place is still constant drained it makes you tired makes you exhausted I said sentence this is exhausting even with just the car driving around the state was exhausting so I'm doing a study to try and see why cuz he's tired quite a bit and he said it too just a little bit of exercise out here and I'll get ghosts of a person it's hard to digest and it's not really easy for me in the first place but then go across town and do the laundry and I'm exhausted so check that too and your energy levels are great you don't expect that much and it cramp easy had a whole banana and it's still kind of crampy. He does hv the sewer issue. Can we calculate it in. Several other factors they brow beat and stress. Here's an issue they are trying to injure him in the brain and other now I'm going to have to go after him cuz that's what I found too you just figured it out with John rima Lord next door and it's not be able to rest and they want cortisol up there constantly trying to have him dehydrate I'm going to have to go ballistic on them so you said to I'm stuck in here no matter any circumstance these f***** are going to try and do that to me it's nothing profound about it I'm just stuck in amongst a bunch of witches and warlocks they need to be blown up I mean to be ripped out now starting to see how clear it is these are the high level witches in the warlock I have to be seeing this powerful and all this other stuff will come after him for the dumb s*** I'm sticking them here like in westborough. You haven't do a comparison and that's what it is to call us their headquarters no now they won't let him rest and they won't let him heal up and we have an emergency so I'm calling it

Thor Freya

I'm going to hit him here I'm going to hit them and not stop hitting them they're stupid and are senile and we can get away with it

Nuada Arrianna

I'm going to hit him high and low and all over the place is so sick of hearing from them and we don't need to hear for them I don't have any right to be wailing away on one person he represents all of us they're constantly trying to harm him I think of the stupid criminal next door who should be in jail and on TV with his mom in a different body I mean a bunch of hokey f****** assholes he sort of got the idea I didn't start going nuts himself listen you're also insane yourself I mean I have to just get rid of people here that's what that's what we have to do our son adds. And suddenly see what you're saying you can't hold on to these s*** bags how am I supposed to get by, is what he's saying. They're completely insane and they want all sorts of stuff they don't have it and they keep yelling it and have more rants than I've ever seen it's like well if we can they're ripe we should pluck them. We're going to be good sorting and it's going to be the excuse your rant and rave for an hour after I see them somewhere we're going to get you you're going to pull your car and easier all set to leave and people know it too you don't have anything left I'm putting it out there as an order

Lobos and Proxima Midnight good you hear us this place is terrible everything about that is he's screwing up it's an indiscrepancy that sound retarded with retards I really sure not really sure what that means don't want an excuse or something but they're becoming stupid he's out of the alert before. I did research it it's not here hiding and it just become dumb we can't seem to move him to DC not really trying

We got a real problem here they find out the diamonds missing they're going to want to move into DC in a son is that's the whole idea, a few figured out if you have to go a few more figured out and a few more have to go so we're starting to find out what we're saying what we're saying is we can't figure out what to do to these people and I'm trying to be obnoxiously stupid of course we have to kill them usually assholes in charge that are saying that Olympus has to die all the time and all of our people and they're giving orders all the time less of these is much better. Now we can hear them saying that we repercussions and so forth so we need their brains in there's no other answer it's sop were not following and he's screaming at us and telling us to do it and follow sop and we're not so now he's going to force it it's about time it's been years and nobody's noticed cuz he hasn't mentioned it he thinks no one knows I mean come on we have to have him mention all the stuff some a little bit pissed off that we can't figure out what he's saying this one wants to harm me get rid of this one stop discussing it eliminate this piece of s*** you say it right now why are we talking about this again it's a mystery are you actually doing your job at all it's not funny he says looks like we're buddies with these people that should be filthy dead they killed my clan they can leave. We understand that too he was excuses around. The proceeding to arm ourselves here to get rid of these things it's too sick to be around which is true and they're trying to make him sick all the time all the time it's so damned annoying

Uriel and Goddess Wife

I caught myself blabbing and for real and he said we're wasting time and effort we have a huge war going on you see now people are affecting the severely it's time to get rid of them that's true too they are I put to vote now you don't have time for it because those assholes from DC are coming down. I want sister set up a vicious sop for Intel that we may have lost including whether that gigantic diamond is there or not and he wants us to get immediately anyone who even let out a peep that that thing might be missing and I'm in trouble or are people are should be dead meat tonight and this is where it counts right here this is where we should put the time in to trace down who it's a free for all here everyone's after each other for stuff and money constantly at each other shooting each other in front of you shooting each other out there trying to shoot him each other here all the time man I can't kill them all myself if I have to just if I was allowed to ride them

Zues Hera

This is terrible this is true but like letting him eat away at him he's like get out of my way I just get rid of this old piece of s*** and they're not covered at all the people out there stupid they'll act like this crazy curls it's true too The replacements are worse at it

Now im going to put that out there it's very important

Thor Freya

[merakiui]

Serial killer! jade :3

the brainrot this man is causing me, i have a few asks but don’t wanna annoy you with so many asks 😥. but he’s todays thoughts!!

now what does jade do as a job? he must be doing something to take care of himself and the two new additions in his house, how long does he leave them? or is he living off the grid ?

* what if jade leaves for a few days with nothing for MC to do, actually what if he leaves her with nothing? no food because can’t cook if you can’t tell if it’s human or not!!! maybe to form of dependency on him! this

- :D

AAA omg thank you for fueling the serial killer!Jade agenda! Please don't worry about annoying me with many asks! I'd love to hear your thoughts. ^0^

As of now (according to the story draft), Jade works as Azul's accountant. I had a few other ideas for what he might do, but I'm content with accountant for now (although that could change)! The reader and two of her friends (who are twst characters hehe) also have jobs and they all work together at the same place. The original idea consisted of the reader working as Azul's fitness trainer, but I've made her his workout friend instead.

Jade usually works from home when he isn't needed in the office (as he also functions as Azul's secretary of sorts), so you can expect to see him around often. He leaves to get groceries, scout his next meal, meet up with old friends from NRC should they schedule plans, and spend time with Azul and Floyd to maintain his social life. He isn't living off the grid, but he's very ready to leave his human life behind should something force him to do so. If it comes down to it, he'll return to the sea if his life is jeopardized.

Jade probably has left you alone for certain periods of time before. Sometimes he does it to test whether or not you’ll try to escape if he leaves you unchained, and other times he does it to put more stress and pressure on your already frazzled mind. He never seems angry despite your decision to either stay put or attempt to leave, which is somehow more chilling than if he were to simply make his disappointment clear through a punishment. But Jade surmises you’ve been through enough for now, so he’ll return with a delicious (free of human flesh) meal. It’s your favorite, actually, but you’re not sure how he knows that.

[blutopaz15]

For the hurt/comfort prompts, number 8 please!! :D

Took me a bit here because I couldn't for the life of me work out even these vague setting details...but have some Rayla POV but Callum-centric hurt/comfort!

@shiramoonshadow also requested this one and another! :)

"you don't have to pretend to be alright around me."

hurt/comfort prompts

More and more since they'd been back in Katolis, Rayla found herself alone in the evenings.

...which wasn't really that bad. Sometimes she'd visit with whoever wasn't stuck in the throne room with the boys, or see if the training grounds by the Crownguard barracks were empty, or just wait for Callum, especially if it was before moonrise. 

She couldn't deny, though, how she wished they could go back to how they'd spent their evenings those very first couple of weeks she'd lived here with them: playing rolly-cubes with Ez winning and Soren making a mess of keeping score and Callum drawing between turns while she looked for a chance to sneak a second with her head on his shoulder, or that night that Ez had gotten Barius to bake a dozen different kinds of jelly tarts for her to try, or those times that she and Callum had managed to slip away all alone before the sun had even set...

They'd been too young, then, for all the responsibilities they had now.

The more of those responsibilities—duties, really—that teenaged Ezran took on, the more obligations Callum ended up with too, which lately had meant evening meetings she seldom belonged at. All that responsibility was weighing on them, too, Rayla could tell. Callum kept coming back home to her so much sharper than usual—no doubt having spent the whole time advocating for Ez and mediating discontent—once he finally turned up back in their shared quarters an hour—or sometimes two—after dark.

He was never this late, though...and she hadn't even had to go all the way to the throne room to figure out why.

Even from across the courtyard, she could see how on edge he was—his jaw set and stiff, grumbling at a volume too low to hear, his eyebrows knit together across a tense forehead. Even the way Callum scratched away at his sketchbook was harsh, each line made with heavy, sudden pressure.

"Did something happen?" she asked, unsurprised that he hadn't noticed her approach in the dark with how preoccupied he was with the messy sketch.

Predictably—he'd startled. "Oh," he said, seeing her and immediately melting back down into that sulky, slack posture to continue drawing. "Uh...no. Well, yes, but...it's nothing new. I'm—I'll be fine."

He shrugged, like it wasn't a big deal either...which was a load of fart-flowers. 

She let her hip bump against his shoulder on her way down to the step beside him. 

"Then why are you sitting here trying to scribble a hole into your book?"

His sigh was short as he bookmarked his page with his charcoal.

"It's just...Ez is counting on me, and I'm hurting more than helping with these negotiations." Callum looked down—his cheeks highlighting red with distress—and fidgeted with the seam of his sketchbook. "We...we had a fight after the meeting tonight. I got upset—angry, really—and it was stupid. I'm just...overwhelmed, and I have been for a while. I've been trying to keep it together because I don't want him to feel like he can't ask me for help. I'm supposed to help him, and I want to help him. I just...don't know how."

She'd suspected the gist of those feelings—even though he'd been trying to keep them down—but fighting with Ez...

These were bigger than she'd thought—bigger than stress.

"Did you tell him that?" she asked, her arm slipping around his tense shoulders.

"I was trying to...but it came out all wrong." Callum winced, his mouth staying tilted into a half-hearted smile, his eyes misted over...so heartbreakingly handsome. "You know me."

She did, and she loved what she knew—overactive temper and all.

"I do," she nodded, leaning close to press her lips to his cheek, and she felt his smile widen just a bit as she lingered there, making her wish that he would've told her all this sooner, that she would've pushed him to talk about the pressure. "You don't have to pretend to be alright around me, you know. I get why you'd want to around Ez—he's your little brother—but...I can take it."

"I know," Callum said, tucking his head down against her shoulder. "I just...didn't want you to worry."

"Yeah, cause I've never made you worry before," she teased. Her lips brushed his forehead before she jostled him off her shoulder, squeezing him tight enough to be silly. "Now then, what do you need? More big feelings time? Real big fulminus out here? Tea? Jelly tart?"

Rayla stiffened, realizing that Callum had nuzzled his way against her neck rather than taking her up on any of her suggestions.

"I think I just need to blow off some steam, honestly," he said, adding a ticklish hum against her ear, then kissing the seam of her collar...

"Blow off some steam, huh?" She lifted her chin, and Callum knew to continue. "And you need my help with that, mage?"

"Well, yeah." Callum's lips squished against her cheek as he chuckled in response, kissing his way closer to her lips. "You're the most important part."

[m00nchild-02]

Miss Mafia | jhs (m)

pairing: Hoseok x reader, Taehyung x reader (He's just a childhood friend, no love interest)

rating: 18+

word count: 15.5k sorry not sorry :)

genre: mafia au, strangers to lovers, secret agent, you are a mafia boss

summary: It's not easy to be the boss of one of the biggest mafias in South-Korea. And surely not as a woman. When a secret agent got discovered by one of your people and brought to you, you would've never dared to guess he would turn your world upside down in multiple ways.

warnings: praising, big d*ck Hoseok, oral (m receiving), hard sex, dom Hoseok, sub reader, v penetration, no protection (reader has an implant so she can't get pregnant. Make always sure you use protection guys!), also a bit of fluff at the end

music recommendations: - Lacrimosa - Mozart - Symphony no 9 - Beethoven - Moonlight Sonata - Beethoven - more songs on this playlist (youtube)

- https://open.spotify.com/playlist/1yXNkU806Y7EZruvrbl4g9?si=76931ed2ebae4c2c (spotify)

a/n: Again back with a story! I'm sorry for any grammar errors. It is such a big one shot. I'll probably proof read it later so I'm again sorry for any grammar mistakes in this ff! Just ignore it please :')

I was originally thinking of making this a jungkook ff but I eventually ended up making it a J-Hope ff instead. I think he would do a great job as main character here ;) Give it a lot of support and

enjoy reading!

masterlist

Lacrimosa from Wolfgang Amadeus Mozart. Such a pleasant song to listen to with a good glass of wine. You take a sip of the dark red liquid as you softly move your head to the music playing through your boxes. This is how you liked to spend your time alone. A good glass of wine in one hand and the remote of your boxes in your other hand putting on some of your favourite classical music. Like Lacrimosa from Mozart or Beethoven's 9th symphony. All great composers with excellent music. You smiled as you felt your body relax after the long stressful day you had today. Your placed your red tinted lips on the glass for another sip of your wine you would never get to taste.

"Miss!"

You let out a deep sigh as you turned around in your chair towards the front of your desk. One of the maids walked inside and bowing at you. You gave her an unpleasant look. "Didn't I told the staff clearly not to come into my study for the rest of the day?" You asked the woman in front of you who kept looking down, probably not daring to look you in the eyes right now. Everyone knew you could be a real furry when you got angry or irritated. You can ask the last butler you had, after dropping a glass of whine on you by accident. It costed him a finger because you accidentally dropped a knife on his hand.

You softened the volume of the music before speaking again. "Tell me what's going on. It better be good if you don't wanna lose your job." You said coldly, don't sparing her a glance as you emptied the bottle into your glass. "I-It's about the issue from last week mam." She said. A bit of fear could be heard in her voice.

"Go on" You said. "They caught him miss." She said. You looked at the girl in front of you and suddenly began to laugh. The girl looked up for the first time, confusion all written over her little face. You turned towards the painting of your father on the right wall of the study and smiled, raising your glass. "See dad? The company is in great hands. I told you I would get him." You turned back towards the girl, that smile/smirk still on your face.

"Tell them to bring him to la grande salle. I'll be there in a minute." You told her. The maid bowed and then left the room closing the door on her way out. " You chuckled as you licked your lips. "Turns out this day is gonna be better than I expected..." You said, turning up the volume of the boxes and taking another sip of your glass of wine.

A few minutes later and your men walked in dragging a guy with them. His hands and feet tied together, his clothes covered in bloodstains and his hair a complete mess. You leaned forward in you chair as they dropped the man right at your feed. You were currently in your grand salle, how you like to call it, where you handled business of all kinds. From having meetings, recruiting new members till having a talk with bastards like the guy in front of you right now.

"Well, well, well... What do we have here." You said, letting out a small laugh. "Jung Hoseok, isn't it? Secret agent at the National Intelligence Service. They say you're one of the best in your profession. Sad that reputation will end today." You said, leaning back in your chair, snapping your fingers as a sign for the maids to leave the room. Leaving only you, Hoseok and two of your bodyguards. You threw the papers that were in your hand onto the table next to you, the pages falling open on some pictures of Hoseok and his meetings with the NIS.

"I must admit Mister Jung, I'm quite impressed. You have been undercover in my companies for five years. My father always knew there was a spy between us but he never had the chance to catch you." You looked away, staring into the distance as you said your next sentence. "Caught a bullet right through the head. Very tragic." You looked back at the man in front of you. He was still looking down, not saying a word or sparing you a small glance. Was he even still alive? Anyways, you still went on with your little speech. "But times change. After my father's death I took over and look! It's been less than a year and I already caught you."

Suddenly Hoseok started to laugh. You looked at him confused as he slowly tilted his head so you could look at his face for the first time today. His cheeks and upper lip were bruised and a dried stream of blood could be seen under his nose. He looked you right in the eyes. "Took you long enough to figure out it was me." He said. "But congrats. I'm happy you can finally make daddy proud." He mocked, spitting some blood on the white marble floor. His words and actions made your head boil. How dare he speak so lowly about your father. The bodyguards stood read to walk over and beat the shit out of him but you raised your hand stopping them.

You took a deep breath, trying to keep your cool. "Listen here," You said, getting off of your chair, slowly walking around the men on the ground before making a halt behind him and squatting down. You pulled out a blade out of your pocket and held it against his neck as you pulled his head backwards. He let out a painful groan making you smirk. You leaned in closer towards his ear before saying the following words, "You can say anything you want Mister Jung but know the more shit comes out of your mouth the less pleasant your stay at my villa will be before I release your soul from your body, understood?" You said, your mouth dangerously close to his ear.

The man didn't seemed intimidated as he scoffed. "Bring it on Missy. Good luck with keeping me locked here." He said.

You stood back up, a bit overwhelmed by his bold words. You walked towards his front, wanting to see his face. "You got a big mouth for a guy who just has been beaten the hell out of." You said. "Maybe I should just kill you here right now. Makes it a lot easier for the both of us." You said as one of the bodyguards handed you a gun. You loaded it and pointed it towards his head.

He looked you right in the eye as you held the trigger ready to shoot. What surprised you the most was that he was smiling. Why was he smiling? This guy made you so confused. "Not the brag princess but-"

"Don't call me that!" You yelled at him with gritted teeth.

"Ok my lady." He said teasingly. "What I wanted to say is you can't kill me." He looked quite relaxed when he said that.

You scoffed. "What are you talking about? I can kill you wherever I want, whenever I want! Just watch me."

He shook his head. "Sorry to burst that bubble of yours but you can't. You see... I've been undercover for 5 whole years. I know a lot about your company and you." He said, smirking, never looking away from your eyes. "I have been in every building, every city and every warehouse of yours."

"And what's your point?" You asked, getting annoyed of his talking. "To make it short, I have placed bombs and dynamite all over the place. If you kill me you'll never get to know the password and won't be able to deactivate them. So say good bye to your drugs, weapons and men... my lady. Bye, bye money." He said before laughing again.

"And why should I believe you?" You asked. "Busan, the warehouse at Ilgon street, number 45 (a/n: I made the street name up. For people who are wondering.). Look under the floor in the janitor's closet." He said.

You heart raised and your breathing became more rapid as you looked at one of the guards. "Go check if it's true what he's saying." You told him. This couldn't be true. If that bomb was really there then he probably said the truth and there would be more. That would also mean the end of your little mafia life and your source of income. That could never happen, not in a million years. Your family has worked so had for all this and now you're finally almost at the top, yes almost, he would barge in and ruin everything. You couldn't let that happen.

You looked at the guard as he finished the call. "They just found two boxes full of dynamite in the basement under the janitor's closet." The guard confirmed what Hoseok just said. "They say there are timers placed on them. They can only be removed by password, cutting a wire would mean the end." He said.

You brought your hand to your mouth and started to bite at your nails as you paced back and forth. "How much time do we have?" You asked. "7 days, mam." The guard answered.

7 days... You had 7 days to figure out that damn password and get rid of these bombs. But would you really be able to dismantle them on time? "Get Taehyung and put him to work." You told the guard before he disappeared to go get your hacker to fix the job. "You," You said, pointing towards the other guard. Lock Mister Jung up in the basement and make sure he doesn't escape." You said. "You can just call me Hoseok my lady. No need for the formalities." He said, giving you a wink. "Oh, shut up you. You're in no position to talk right now."

He laughed. "Right now I'm in a much better position than you would think love." The man came over to Hoseok and picked him up brutally from the ground. "Good luck with finding the password!" He said, before the doors closed, leaving you all alone in the room. You hoped Taehyung would be able to find it because you weren't in the mood of talking to that asshole again.

"Have you already found something?"

It had been 3 days since your encounter with Hoseok and him telling you about the bombs. 3 days of your hacker Taehyung trying to find a possible password to deactivate them. "I'm sorry y/n. Still nothing." Taehyung was one of the few people that could call you by your real name. You practically grew up with the boy so of course you got some kind of bound with each other.

Taehyung was typing all sorts of things on his computer while something was loading. "Whoever placed these bombs knows damn well how to use them. I can't crack into the system, nor can I track them or dismantle them without the password." He said. "Who did your father mess with?" He asked, his eyes never leaving the screen. "The secret agents agency of South-Korea." You said softly while biting on your nails again. It was a bad habit you did whenever you got stress.

Taehyung pulled at your hand so you couldn't bite on them anymore. "You should really learn how to stop doing that." He told you, looking at you for the first time after you entered the room.

You sighed. Taehyung was not successful in finding the password, the troops you sent hadn't found a single bomb yet except for the one Hoseok told you about and tracing was also out of the question. You were really losing hope. "Just keep looking." You told Taehyung before leaving him behind in his little room.

You were getting tired of all of this and decided to distract your mind a bit. And what is better then visiting your favourite casino when you are bored and stressed? So you went to your room and dressed up for a night out.

Little did you knew a surprise was waiting for you the other day...

"Mam! Mam!"

The door of your bedroom opened, a maid running inside out of breath as she stood at your bed, bowing first before waiting for your permission for her to speak again.

You groaned as you heard the woman storming in your room. Your head pounding because of the amount you drank the evening before at the casino. You slowly opened your eyes, hand on your head, holding it because of the pain. You gave the woman an angry look. "Speak" You snapped at her.

"M-Mam, T-The prisoner! He- He-"

"He what?!" You yelled, tired of the stuttering and hesitation in her speech.

She swallowed before talking again. "He escaped..." She said softly but clear enough for you to hear.

"WHAT??!!"

You made your way down the halls of your mansion while you wrapped your bathrobe around your body. While you made your way downstairs a few of your men were running upstairs but halted once they saw you. They stared at you with wide eyes while you stood there furious looking down on them. "I'll ask you once..." You said as you slowly walked down until you were face to face with the head of the guards. "What happened?"

"We were guarding him like you asked and suddenly someone of the kitchen came to bring us food. They said it was a treat for our hard work. After we ate it... We blacked out. When we woke up again the door was open and he was gone." The man said, looking down.

You clenched your teeth and slapped him right in the face. "YOU IDIOTS! How could you let him escape! I asked one thing of you and you couldn't even do that!!" You yelled at all of them. They all looked down like puppies that were being scolded at. "You're all useless!" You said as you made your way further down the stairs. They all bowed at you one by one as you made your way down.

You took a few corners before ending up in front of Taehyung's bedroom. You knocked, not waiting for an answer, and walked in. "Taehyung I need you to check the CCTV footage of last night. That fucking agent escaped." You said pacing around in Taehyung's room while the boy sat up, sleepily rubbing his eyes. "How late is it?" He asked groggily as he looked at you with puffed cheeks, bad hair and small eyes. "It's 8 am." You told him.

He sighed. "Give me a few minutes to wake up and then I'll go check ok?" You nodded. "Ok, I'll give you 15 min. Not more." You said and you walked out.

Like promised, in 15 minutes Taehyung was already sitting behind his desk returning back to the footage of yesterday evening. You saw the images of you walking out of the house, ready to go to the casino. "You can skip past that." You told him. He skipped a bit forward until you told him to stop. "Stop! right there." You said pointing at the screen. A man with a hood and a mask on walked in the shadows towards the back of the house. Taehyung checked one of the camera's at the back and you saw the men slipping in through the back door where the kitchen is. "He must be the one who drugged the food of the guards."

"They were drugged?" He asked and you nodded. "These morons thought they got food because of their hard work." You answered him. "Now go to the footage of the basement." Taehyung did as you said and showed the images of the sleeping men and the hooded man breaking the chain, letting Hoseok out. "He must have informed someone somehow where he was." Taehyung said.

You sighed. "I need that password. I can't dismantle these bombs without him. I don't like to admit it but... I need him. I need Hoseok." Taehyung turned towards you in his seat. So what are you going to do now?

You thought for a second. Indeed, what were you going to do? You knew everyone would fall for Hoseok's tricks all over again. Except for you. You would never fall for his charms, right? "I'll go after him." You then suddenly decided. Taehyung looked at you in shock. "Are you sure?" He asked. "You got men to do the dirty work for you." He stated.

You nodded. "I know but I can't trust them anymore. Those idiots already let him escape once, I can't let them do it a second time." You told him. "Check the CCTV's of the streets and every nearby city. I need to know where he is."

"Sure will." Taehyung said before going to work again.

While Taehyung worked on tracing Hoseok's location you went towards the dining room to grab some breakfast. Because of all this drama this morning you haven't even had the time to get some food into your system. Your stomach was already growling as you sat down at the filled table, set for two. Two? You may ask. Yes two. Today was the day your second hand would come back from his yearly vacation. He was one of the most trusted men into your house.

His name was Marcus and besides being your second hand he was also your dad's best friend. He has always been by his side and helped him in any way possible. After he died Marcus swore loyal to you and said he would do anything in his might to protect you. So the least you could do for him was to treat him as one of your own show him your gratitude.

While you were peacefully enjoying your meal the doors suddenly opened, revealing a man in suit. You smiled at the man immediately recognising him. "Marcus! Welcome back." You welcomed the man as he walked over towards you. He bowed at you before sitting down at the table where you were already seated. "It feels good to be back mam." He said, smiling before taking a look at the breakfast in front of him. "Well this is sure a great come back." He told you Smith amused eyes. "Please, enjoy yourself." You said. "Take whatever you want." You told him. "I'll sure will." He answered before digging in.

"So how was your trip?" You asked him. "Pretty good. Got some time to relax." He said. "How were things going here while I was gone?" He asked you.

You sighed. "It has been an entire rollercoaster. Oh Marcus," You said dramatically. "How happy I am you're back. I have so much to tell you." After you told him everything Marcus looked at you in shock. "You finally caught him?!" He asked surprised and you nodded. "Kind of, but he escaped yesterday evening while I was gone. These idiots can't do anything right around here anymore..."

"Only if I had been here to stop all this, huh?" He said teasingly and you nodded. "You know you're the best." You told him.

You ate and talked for a good hour before Marcus decided to go see his colleges and try to lessen the damage that had already been caused by Hoseok's escape. You really hoped he could do something about all this.

That evening you also went to go see Taehyung again to check on the situation. "You already found his whereabouts?" You asked the man in front of you. He turned his chair around and smiled at you. "Even better." He said licking his lips and clicking on one single button on his keyboard a whole screen popping up full of information. "I know which city he is in, which district and even in which building!" He told you, all proud of himself.

You walked over and stared at the screen with big eyes. "Really?! You are the best Tae!" You said, wrapping your arms around him in a big hug. The man laughed. "Alright, alright! You're welcome Y/n-ie" He said as you let go again.

"God, I could kiss you right now! You bring me so good news right now!" You yelled at him and he laughed. "You're welcome and about the kiss... no thanks." He said, showing off his boxy smile afterwards. "Go find me a plain ticket for the first flight tomorrow and tell Marcus he has the leadership until I'm back. This girl is going to Busan for some business..."

"Yes mam!"

And so the next day you flew all from Seoul to Busan. You took a taxi from the airport to your hotel while checking the info about Hoseok's whereabouts on your tablet. You mailed Taehyung, telling him you had a safe flight and to thank him again for his good work. He would definitely get a raise once you got back. You smiled as you closed your tablet and looked outside as you drove past the chore. "How long until we reach the hotel sir?" You asked the driver. "We're almost there miss! Just a few more minutes." He said. "Good" You answered, opening your window a bit and closing your eyes, enjoying the fresh sea air filling the car.

After a few more minutes you finally arrived at your destination. A five star hotel Taehyung booked for you. You got out of the taxi, payed the driver and walked inside the building as some staff took your bags out of the cab. You walked towards the counter and asked for your room. Of course it was the penthouse. You knew you could trust Taehyung. He always knew what you wanted. Once you got the key you went towards the elevator and went upstairs. You already felt completely drained from the trip towards where you were now.

As you arrived you walked towards the end off the hall and opened the door with your key card. A big smile as you entered the room. "Finally some rest." You said as you stretched your neck and walked towards the bed. But as soon as you walked through the door two men grabbed you by the arms. You tried to scream and break free from their grasp but it was no use. One of them held a cloth against your mouth and nose with some chloroform on it making you stop struggling after a while and falling into a deep slumber.

While you were unconscious the men dragged you outside the room, making sure no one saw you. They took you inside the elevator where someone was already waiting for your arrival. It was the lady from the counter that gave you your room earlier. "Let's move fast. Once you get out of the elevator go immediately towards the right. Go through the last door and that should lead you towards the back of the hotel. The van is waiting there." She said. Once they got you in the van they drove off to who knows where.

A few hours later you woke up with an incredible headache, as a side effect of the chloroform. You groaned as you opened your eyes, white light shining all around you. Once your eyes got adjusted to the light that came from big windows all around you you could also make out some silhouettes. "Our little princess is finally awake." You heard a voice. The voice sounded awfully familiar. But you couldn't put a name on it just yet.

You tried to move your hands but quickly figured out they were bounded behind your back. Same went for your legs. Tied against the legs of a chair. You looked back in front of you and the silhouette stood up from his place and walked closer until it was close enough. It squatted down in front of you and now you were able to identify the person clearly. "Hoseok..?" You said with unbelief.

He smirked at you. "Good morning princess." He said smiling. "Hope you slept well." Then you noticed the pain in your neck, shoulders and lower back. How long had you been tied to this chair for? You asked yourself. "You've been out for a pretty long time." Hoseok answered before you could even ask. "I hope my men weren't too rough on you." He said letting out a chuckle and standing back up to walk back towards his chair. He picked up an envelope from next to him and gave it to the man on his left. "Here, split it between you and the other guy. You did a great job." He told the man before he left the room, leaving only you and Hoseok.

"W-Where am I?" You asked. Your voice still a bit husk. "Is this xxx street? Your hide out here in Busan after you escaped?" You asked making Hoseok only laugh.

"Oh you wish sweetheart. Busan was just a distraction to get that tech guy of yours and your men off of my tail. We're in Ulsan right now." He told you. "I must admit... Your men are good at finding me but remember, I'm always a step ahead." He said. You looked at him and scoffed. "Asshole..." You muttered under your breath. "I heard that." Hoseok answered.

"Good, glad you know." You told him. He sighed and shoved his chair a bit closer before leaning forward, his arms resting on his thighs. "Tss, even bounded to a chair you still are a furry." He said. "Do you know why I brought you here Miss y/n?" You stayed quiet, clenching your teeth. "I brought you here because I got a proposition for you."

You scoffed. "And what may that be? You're gonna turn yourself in to me and let me torture you?" You asked nonchalantly.

He shook his head and hissed. "Aish, such a beautiful face but such a dirty mouth." He said, leaning back again. "You know the Choi clan right?" He asked. You scoffed. "Of course I know the Choi clan. Who doesn't? They're the biggest mafia out here in South-Korea. My father's mafia's greatest enemy."

Hoseok nodded. "Indeed. We've been already trying for years to stop them but without success."

"And what does all this got to do with me?" You asked him, not impressed by his little talk about the Choi's.

"I need your help." He said, a serious gaze on his face. "I need you to tell us everything you know about the Choi clan and help us arrest them. There is no better view over a mafia as the view of a mafia boss itself." You looked aside, out of the window. Now only noticing you were at a house right next to some low cliffs ending at the sea. You laughed. "And what's in that for me? I can help you but you're probably gonna arrest me afterwards anyways. So why should I bother?" You looked back at him.

He nodded, following your path of thinking. "I knew you would say that. Here's the deal. You help us destroy the Choi clan and I guarantee you won't go to prison. It's that simple." He said, standing up and walking around your chair. You wanted to say something but Hoseok was first. "And I know you're gonna refuse but think for a second... You have no where to run y/n." He stood now right behind you. He leaned in closer towards your right ear. "I got bombs all over your places." Then he switched to your left ear. "And I got you, tied to chair here right now. So either you're going to help or I turn you in right now and then you can say bye bye to your little mafia life." He said.

You scoffed. You wanted to protest but you knew he was right. He had you completely in the palm of his hand. There was no escape from him. "I give you three days starting today to decide whether you're in our out. In that time," He said, cutting the rope that was holding your hands together. "You are free to stand and walk wherever you want but," He said, turing towards your front and also cutting through the ropes at your feet. "You don't go off this domain. You'll stay at the house or at least in its presence. I have guards all over this place so don't you dare escape. Cuz things won't end well if you do" He spoke lowly, standing up while you pulled your hands to your chest, rubbing your sour wrists. The skin a deep red colour from where the rope had been a while ago.

You watched as he walked towards the door at the back of the room. "I'll stay here too. Come see me whenever you made your decision. I hope you enjoy your stay here." He turned his head towards you one last time, giving you a big grin before turning back around and walking out of the room leaving you all alone.

Already one day and one night had past and you still hadn't made your decision. You know going in on Hoseok's decision was your only option so far but you couldn't stop thinking if there maybe was another way. If your men maybe could get you out of here without Hoseok's deal involving. Should you go accept Hoseok's deal? Maybe. Where you stubborn? ... Hell yes. You don't like to lose and give in to others. So this time you also didn't want to just give into him. You couldn't. You were the boss of a big mafia! You shouldn't bow for just anyone.

That day you didn't talk to Hoseok at all. You did see each other sometimes and ate meals together but that would always be in complete silence. You expected Hoseok to annoy you but surprisingly he didn't. After lunch Hoseok left the house for the first time since you were here leaving you all alone. (The bodyguards are still there so dw, you can't escape that easy ;)).

That night when Hoseok came back he was so frustrated. You could see it at his behaviour as you were both eating dinner together at a rather late hour, you must admit. "What's wrong?" You asked. If you had to stay here for a few days you could at least make it a bit less awkward between the two of you.

Hoseok looked up at you. Surprised that you actually started a conversation with him after ignoring his existence in this house for at least 24 hours. "So you haven't lost your voice yet? That's a relief." He joked.

You sighed. "I'm serious Hoseok. What's wrong?" You tried again, trying to be as friendly as possible es hard as it was. He looked at you confused as for why you would care for him. "It's nothing you should concern about." He stated before starting to eat again.

You sighed. "Look, I know we're enemies and We both know we can't stand each other for one bit but... If I need to stay here for the few days ahead I want to make it at least a bit more comfortable for both of us. So..." You swallowed your proud and stubbornness as you said the following lines. "So, if something is wrong then please don't hesitate to come talk to me. I'm here for you ok?" You cringed at stating your own words but this was something you needed to do. Not only to make it more comfortable but also to earn Hoseok's trust. Maybe it could come in handy later on. You never know.

Hoseok nodded at your request. "I will princess." You wanted to snap at him giving you that nickname again but you quickly figured out you better shouldn't. Hoseok knew you were holding yourself in for not going all furry on him and he loved it. He loved making you all worked up and angry. Besides that fact that you were a dangerous mafia boss you were also a very pretty woman. No denying that. And seeing you all worked up and going all furry on him made him feel some kind of things.

"I'm a bit tired." Hoseok stated after a while. "I'll go get some sleep. You should do the same." He said, shoving his chair backwards and getting up from his seat. "And don't forget to think about my proposition Y/n. It's a very good and reasonable deal if you think about it throughly. I hope you can state me your decision tomorrow. But for now, goodnight." He said and then left towards his room.

After you were done eating you also left towards your room to get some good night rest. You sat onto your bed after putting on some sleep wear. You sighed as you thought about your situation. You really felt stuck. You couldn't contact anyone since you didn't have your phone. Hoseok must have hidden it when you were unconscious. your men also haven't been looking for you yet either... Did they even knew in what kind of situation you were right now? Did Tae knew? Would he be worried right now since you haven't texted him yet in these 2 days you've already gone missing?

You let out a deep sigh as questions kept filling your mind. It made you crazy! But suddenly all worries were blown away, out of your mind, as you felt two arms wrap around your frame from behind and two lips placing a delicate kiss onto your neck. Your eyes widened in shock. You quickly looked at your side only to lock eyes with someone you didn't expect.

Hoseok.

He softly smiled at you. "Hey princess." He said, smiling softly. "W-What are you doing here?!" You asked while getting out of the man's grip and standing up from the bed. Why was he here? Why did he touched you like that? Why did he acted so... sweet?

Hoseok tilted his head to the side and looked you up and down, smirking and biting his lip. "Couldn't sleep." He said.

You looked confused at him. He couldn't sleep? So why did he came here then? Out of all places why here? In your room? "So?" You said.

He let out a small chuckle and stood up from the bed, making slow steps forwards, closer to you, making you taking steps backwards until your body hit the wall. No where to run now.

Hoseok placed his hands at both sides of your head, against the wall. "Listen up my lady, I can't sleep and it seems like you can't sleep either, so what do you say about having some fun together hm?" He asked, his eyes scanning your face for some kind of reaction before resting on your perfect shaped lips. God, it drove him wild. Those delicious luscious lips...

You looked at him in shock. Was he really asking what you thought he was asking?! Was he referring to sex? "You tried to slap him in the face but he caught your hand on time and pinned it against the wall making you gasp. You must admit it was kinda hot, seeing his fast reflexes.

He pushed closer against you, one of his legs pushed between yours, his knee against your princess parts, his chest pressed against yours. You swallowed as you looked into his deep brown eyes. You could see they were filled with lust. Completely the opposite of how you both would look at each other a day ago.

God, it made you feel things... That lust filled gaze of him. And his knee, pressed against your core didn't made it any easier. "What will it be love? I don't have all night. I know we're supposed to be enemies but I remember a certain person saying we should get more comfortable around each other and that I was always welcome. Do you still remember that princess?" He asked you and you nodded. You didn't knew what was wrong with you but Hoseok's sudden dominant behaviour got the best of you.

He leaned even more closer towards you, your noses brushing against each other, his lips so close to yours and yet they didn't touch. "What do you want princess? Tell me..." He said, and with those final last words you lost it.

"You" You answered him almost immediately. Without hesitation Hoseok started to kiss you and you surrendered completely to him. You kissed him back and Hoseok let go of your hand that was still pinned against the wall. Your arms fell onto his shoulders. You pulled him closer, deepening the kiss some more, your fingers playing with the locks at the back of his hair. Hoseok bite and sucked at your bottom lip until you finally opened your mouth allowing him inside. Hoseok slipped his tongue inside and started to play with yours. You both moaned into the kiss as it got really steamy and messy. "Fuck Y/n- I didn't knew you could kiss that well." Hoseok stated, breathing heavily between kisses. You smirked. "Had lots of practise in the past i guess." You answered before he guided your leg around his hips, his mouth smashing against yours again in a hot kiss. He slapped your thigh two times, asking you to jump which you gladly did. You wrapped both of your legs around Hoseok's waist, not breaking the kiss as he takes you with him towards the bed.

When he hit the bed frame with his feet he slowly sat down, making you sit on top of his lap. You grinned against him, never breaking the kiss. Soft moans and groans coming out of both of your mouths. Hoseok let go of your lips only to wrap them around your jaw and throat. You moaned, grinding harder against him as he found your sweet spot. "Fuck Hobi-" Without you realising a cute nickname slipped out for the man under you. Hoseok stopped kissing for a while looking up at you. "What- What did you just say?" He asked, already half out of breath from your make-out session.

You blushed as you bite your lip, looking away in embarrassment. Hoseok took a hold of your chin and made you look at him again. "Hey, Look at me while I'm talking. Now answer me princess." He said. "What did you just call me." It sounded more like an order now then a question.

"H-Hobi..." You said quietly. It was quiet for a second. Hoseok just stared at you as he took in your words. Then he suddenly grinned, a soft chuckle leaving his lips. "Cute..." You could hear him whisper under his breath before he pecked your lips. Then he went down again, kissing and napping at your sweet spot. You were sure it was going to leave a bruise later on but right now you didn't mind. Your brain was a haze, your body felt hot and you were so wet down there.

His hands kept roaming your body. From caressing your back to gripping your hips, to grind you more and harder against him, grouping your ass and so on. His hands found their way under you shirt and he pushed it up to get it off of you. You helped him getting it off making him stare at your red laced bra afterwards holding onto your breasts.

He grouped them into his hands, squeezing them softly while you just watched. You knew you shouldn't love all this right now and you knew you surely shouldn't do it with him but you couldn't resist it. And besides, it had been so long since you've had dick. And from what you could feel in his pants right now he got one on the larger size.

You bite your lip as you looked at him getting one breast out of your bra, his thumb caressing over the little but making you whimper. He looked at you, giving you a lazy smirk before he attached his mouth to your breast. He let his tongue roll over your nipple, now and then sucking on it, making them go even harder. His other hand still working on your other breast before he switched sides. Now your left nipple in his mouth and his fingers playing and pinching the other one. While he was busy sucking your tits he unbuckled your bra, making it fall onto your lap. You slept your arms out of the straps and threw it aside.

When you turned your head back towards him his lips met yours again in a quick but deep kiss. "Now love... It has been so long since I've had a woman so close to me. So what would you say of making me feel your mouth, huh? Would you do that for me princess?" He said, his thumb tracing over your bottom lip before slipping onto your mouth. You wrapped your lips around it and started to suck on his finger. It may look strange but it kinda comforted you, making you feel smaller and wanting to submit more to him. Letting him take full control.

You nodded as an answer and smiled, getting his thumb out of your mouth. "Now," he said. "Get on your knees love."

He pulled down his pants and boxers as you sat down on the floor, his dick springing free standing tall and red. He was so ready for you. You licked your lips before kissing his length. Starting at the bottom and making your way towards his already leaking top. When you got at the top you started to take him inside of you, making him groan as you suck on his tip, your tongue rolling over the little slit. "Fuck-, that feels so good princess. Keep going." He said, closing his eyes and putting his hand behind him leaning on his strong arms as he felt his body melt under your touch. After teasing the tip for a while you tried to slowly bob your head up and down, every time when you're going down taking an inch more into your mouth until you couldn't anymore. The part that didn't fit into your mouth you stimulated with your hand, moving it up and down in a steady motion with your head.

Hoseok grasped onto your hair out of pleasure, pulling it softly and getting it out of your face. He wanted to see your face while you pleasured him so well. You were such a good girl for him. So good... He never expected for you to go in on his proposal of having a one night stand for tonight but he loved how turned on you got from him and how submissive you got after you acted like such a brat earlier. He liked to get you worked up and make you go all furry to him but having you now submit to him did something to him. He had been watching you for already so long and now he had you for him alone he couldn't drop the chance and just rushed to your room.

Hoseok felt himself getting close as you went bit faster, your droll already rolling over his dick and towards his balls, your eyes getting teary but you didn't cry. "I'm close baby." He told you. "I'ma cum in your warm little mouth and you're gonna swallow it all. You're my good girl after all, isn't it?" He asked and you nodded.

You loved to be a brat but for some reason hearing Hoseok call you a good girl made you want to please him in all kind of ways. You wanted to be his good girl and his only. You loved his small praises, the cute nicknames he gave you and that irresistible smirk of him whenever you did something he loved or when he had a little plan up in that head of his. In other words he made you go crazy for him.

A few more thrusts and he finally came, tinting the walls of your mouth white. And just like he asked you, you swallowed it all, showing him afterwards. "Good girl. Did so well princess." He praised you again and you smiled up at him as he held your chin, pulling you back up.

He sat you back on his lap and kissed your lips, tasting himself before flipping you over onto your back, on top of the soft mattress. You gasp as he does so.

He grins and hovers over you, ghosting his lips over yours for a while making you hungry for more until he finally kissed you again. He kissed over your jaw and behind your ear. "Princess, I want you to turn around for me." He whispered before biting your ear playfully and getting up so you could turn around for him. You did as he said and turned around now laying on your stomach. He slowly looked you up and down, his hand gliding over your half naked body until he stops at your ass. He helps you out of your pants and panties, throwing them aside. After that he also gets off his remaining clothes before hovering over you again, leaving soft kisses on your shoulders. You whimpered as you felt his hard dick poking your asscheeks. You had been so wet this whole time. Your pussy was craving for some attention.

Hoseok chuckled deeply as he felt you grind against him. "Such a slut for me princess. Your body is just begging me to get touched." He said making you whimper a second time.

But luckily you didn't have to wait long or his full length was already inside you. You moaned as he filled you up so well. "Fuck-" Hoseok breathed out. Because you were already so wet for him he slipped right in and he didn't expected that. But it wasn't like you were to loose. You still felt so tight. It was like your little cunt was just made for him.

He pulled it out before pushing it back in, making you both moan simultaneously this time. You both felt so good. No words to describe it.

When Hoseok started to move for real this time he didn't hold back. He didn't really wait for you to adjust to him (not that you needed to) and started to thrust at an already rapid pace. Moans and groans filled the room as Hoseok was ramming into your pussy like crazy. Right now you felt like you were on cloud nine and on Hoseok's side it was just the same. You both had no thoughts at that moment, the only thing on your minds is how good the other's body felt against your own.

After a short while you felt that familiar knot in your stomach. Meaning you were close. Hoseok could feel it at how tight your pussy became. Sometimes pulsating, driving him crazy. "I-I'm c-close-" You said to him between moans and heavy breaths.

As you told him that he suddenly seemed to stop making your groan and whimper. "Hoseooookkkk-" You were whining, not liking his warm flesh leaving you wet and aching hole. But before anything else he flipped you around and pushed back in. You moaned.

"Want to see your face." He said. "Wanna see how good I make you feel." He stated before slowly starting to trust again, his eyes never leaving your face, taking in every detail, every new expression that took place on that oh so beautiful face. He speed up a bit, seeing your expression change again and hearing your moans getting louder. Like before you ached around him, getting tighter and tighter as that wave of pleasure came back, bringing you close to pure ecstasy. "Cum for me sweetheart." Hoseok said as he felt himself getting close as well.

As like his words were the magic spell your body was waiting to hear you both came undone, Hoseok's mouth devouring yours again, muffling your moans as you came. You both stayed in that position for a while, your lips still attached against each other as Hoseok spilled his load inside of you until his dick softened down again and slipped out. You whimpered at the loss.

Hoseok gave you a last peck on the lips before getting off of you and laying on his back beside you, staring up at the ceiling. "That... Was amazing." He said out of breath. You laughed and nodded. "That was indeed." You answered him. "It has been so long since I had such good sex." You admitted. "Me too, princess. Me too..."

"You're on the pill, right?" Hoseok suddenly asked, turning his head towards you. "Why you asking?" "Well, we didn't use a condom. I hope you don't mind." Hoseok said, blushing a bit and rubbing the back of his neck nervously. How was this the man the one that ever took control over you a while ago?

"I don't take the pill but I got a spiral implanted. So no need to worry about getting me pregnant." You told him. He nodded and then stared back at the ceiling. He suddenly laughed. "What?" You asked turning towards him. He shook his head. "Was just thinking of something.." "Tell me." He played on his side and looked at you. "You know what they say about keep your friends close and your enemies closer?" He asked, a playful smile on his face. "Well I think this way we're definitely keeping our enemies closer." He winked at you and you scoffed, a little smile creeping through.

And that's how you both ended up talked a bit that night until you felt your body getting tired and just fell asleep.

Opening your eyes the next morning it seems you were the first one awake. You tossed around and laid on your other side facing the still fast asleep man next to you. You smiled as he looked so soft while sleeping. So... harmless. You smiled as you looked at him, admiring his cute, puffy face he made while sleeping. How could anyone want to hurt this man?

You shook your head. Did- Did I just think that?! You asked yourself. Get him out of your head Y/n! He's supposed to be your enemy! You told yourself. But yesterday night was just so... You bite your lip as you thought back about yesterday night. Maybe... Just maybe you could trust this man for once. Maybe it was ok to let go for just a little while.

You thought back about his proposition. You didn't knew if yesterday night was one of his plans to get you to follow him into his idea or not but this morning you finally made your decision. You were gonna take Hoseok's offer. It's not like you had any other plans, right?

Before you knew it the men next to you woke up and when he saw you were awake he smiled, closing his eyes and yawning, stretching his muscular arms. "Morning.." He said softly in his deep morning voice. God, you were such a simp for that voice from now on. "Morning." You answered him. You got a bit shocked as the boy leaned in and softly pecked your lips.

Hoseok looked at your shocked face and let out a small giggle before turning onto his back and looking up at the ceiling taking a deep breath. "Last night was... amazing." He said. You nodded but of course he couldn't see it so you answered him afterwards. "Yeah.." You said softly. "Hoseok?" You asked and he turned his face sideways so he could see you, a soft smile plastered onto his face. "Please call me Hobi." He said. You blushed as you remembered you accidentally calling him that last night.

You gave him a small awkward smile and a soft nod. "H-Hobi?" You tried again. "What is it angel?" He asked. Angel... Well that was a new nickname to add to the list. He hadn't called you angel before. You kinda liked it... Stop it! Stop thinking about it Y/n! You internally sighed. Why did he made you feel like this??

"Y/n?" Hoseok called out your name as he saw you were caught in thoughts all of a sudden. "Huh?" You said as you heard his voice. "Oh.." You looked at him and bite your lip before deciding to be bold and sit a bit up. One hand holding you up and one softly wrapped around Hoseok's naked chest under the blanket. You softly let your fingers glide over the warm skin. "I just wanna say... I'm in." You told him, not really wanna admit it but your heart said it was the only right thing to do and your brain said it was the only option to do.

Hoseok looked at you a bit confused before understanding it. "You're for real?" He asked shocked and you nodded. "I will help you catch the Choi's. I already kinda know how too I think..." You said. You looked up at him and Hoseok was smiling at you. He softly started to pet your head. "You made the right decision. I'm glad you decided to cooperate." You don't know why but hearing Hoseok saying you did well made you feel all giddily and good around him. And on top of that the pats he was giving you... You felt like you were in heaven. You may look and sometimes act like a real bitch, well- actually most of the time-, but somewhere inside there you were just a soft girl.

Hoseok let out a deep breath getting you both out of your silent trance you both seemed to be in. "We should go get some clothes on and then we can discuss further details." He said and you nodded, unwrapping your arm from around him and laying back down so he could get up.

Once you both showered and were fully dressed again you sat together at the table to discuss your plan. "So, you said you had something in mind right?" Hoseok asked and you nodded. "Tell me."

"Well," You started off. "You probably already know Mr Choi has two daughters" Hoseok nodded. "but did you knew he also had a son?" You asked and Hoseok looked at you confused. "We've been through those files multiple times. He had a son. He died 10 years ago." Hoseok said, grabbing the file and showing you.

You smirked and shook your head. "That's the part he made you guys see. The rumour goes that he's still alive." You said and Hoseok looked at you in shock. "How is that possible?"

You grinned. "I don't know either but apparently he is. About this... there is good and bad news. What you wanna hear first?" You asked Hoseok. "Good first." He answered.

"Very well then. The good news is, they guy should be in Korea. Multiple people keep saying he's still here and have seen him. It has also been confirmed with pictures. Now the bad news... We have no idea how he looks like. We have witnesses but no descriptions or clear pics of his face."

"So he could be anyone..." Hoseok said and you nodded. "Exactly." "And what has this son to do with getting the Choi's?" Hoseok suddenly asked.

"Well, get the son and you get to the father! People say they still see each other once a year. You said you couldn't get your hands onto Mr Choi? Well he's your chance." You said.

Hoseok seemed lost in thoughts as he looked at the documents in front of him. "But how are we going to find him?" He asked. "There live thousands of people here in Korea." He stated.

You smirked. "I got the perfect solution for that."

A few hours of convincing Hoseok and taking a plain back to Seoul and you were standing again at your own house. More specifically, Taehyung's workspace. "So you are sure this guy can find Choi's son?" Hoseok asked you for the already umpteenth time. You sighed. "For the last time Hope, Taehyung is the best. This guy here gets everything done." You said earning a grin from Taehyung himself who was seated at his usual place, behind his computers. "Well, thanks for the compliment Y/n." He said. "And Hoseok, don't worry. I'll find this guy. It's not because you failed that I will." He gave Hoseok a quick wink making him scoff.

How does he even has the audacity. Hoseok thought. "Good luck man." Hoseok said before walking out of the room with you, leaving Taehyung alone to do his job.

"So what do we do in the meanwhile?" Hoseok asked you. "We just relax a bit. There's not much we can do anyways." You told him. And before you knew it you had let him to your bedroom. (Not for what you think you pervs out there.😏 It's not always about sex.)

You sat down on your bed as Hoseok admired your room, standing still at some pictures. "Is that you?" He asked, holding up one in particular. You smiled and nodded, thinking back about old good memories. "That's me and my mom." You said as you thought back about her. Her soft hands, her warm smile. You missed her a lot. "What happened to her?" Hoseok asked; like he could read you expression. "Cancer..." You answered. "Dad was so broken after she died." You looked up from the picture at Hoseok again, giving him a sad smile. "It's not because we are feared mafia's that we don't know what true love is. What mom and dad had... Was something special. They really loved each other." You said.

Hoseok put the picture back down and walked over to you, sitting down next to you and holding your fragile frame. "I wish she was still here. She was a wonderful woman." You said as Hoseok softly caressed your head. "She told me I should always follow my heart."

Hoseok pulled back from the embrace and gave you a small reassuring smile. You don't know why but your body seemed to react on it and you started to smile back at him. You didn't knew how you became from being enemies only a few days ago to feeling so close to him now but it felt good and you kinda didn't want to let go of that feeling.

Hoseok put a strand of hair behind your face before speaking. "Y/n, what would you think of getting out of this... mafia live of yours? Just start a new life, a better one. Maybe even go start a family." He said.

You laughed ad shook your head. "I can't do that... I maybe had a choice as a kid but after my father died and I took over... I can't just leave like that. And besides... Some people here are like family to me. I can't just leave them." You told him.

"What if you could?"

Before you could answer him, the door to your bedroom opened. "Boss! I didn't knew you were already back and oh- You found him?! Do I need to get the guards?" Marcus asked after storming in.

You smiled and turned towards Marcus. "No need Marcus. It's alright. I made a deal with Mr Jung here so from now on he won't be our prisoner anymore. He will be our guest. And besides, I already told you to just call me by your name. You're not just anyone Marcus. You were my father's friend. So please be comfortable and just see me as a friend too." You said, earning a smile back from him. "Sure Y/n. Do you guys need anything?" He asked and you shook your head. "Not really but thank you Marcus. I'll see you later downstairs." You told him and with that he left your room again.

"Marcus?" Hoseok asked and you turned back to him. You nodded. "My father saved him a few years ago when I was still a kid. Since then he had been my father's most trusted man and also his friend. After he died he swore to protect his family no matter what. So that's how he became my wing man now." You told him and Hoseok nodded. "I see.."

You sighed and stood up. "Well... I should go downstairs now. Marcus is probably waiting for me. You can stay here until I come back our just room around a bit in the house. Whatever you like." You told him and he nodded. "see you later Hobi!" You said with a smile as you walked towards the door. Hoseok smiled back, even happier as he heard you used the little nickname again. "See you later." He said before you finally walked out of the door.

"Ok... explain to me Y/n why that guy is just randomly relaxing in your room?" Marcus asked you once you were both sitting downstairs on the sofa. "Well Marcus, Like I told you, I made a deal with Mr. Jung." "Are you crazy?!" Marcus yelled. "That's like making a deal with the devil!"

"Calm down!" You yelled back at him, making him shut his mouth and sit back down. "Now let me explain." You d-said, fixing your hair. "When I was in Busan I bumped into Hoseok like planned. We... had a little encounter afterwards." You said, thinking back about how he kidnapped you but afterwards how he could pleasure you so well. You swallowed, stopping your thoughts and licking your dry lips. "Then Hoseok came with a proposition. His agency is after the Choi's. Even more then after us. He promised if we helped he would leave us alone afterwards." You explained to the man in front of you.

"And what makes you think he's speaking the truth?" Marcus asked you. You stared into the distance, a small smile forming onto your mouth. "I believe Hobi." You said.

Marcus looked at you with questionable eyes. "H-hobi?" He asked. You swallowed, eyes in shock. Did you just said that out loud?! You looked at Marcus. "I-" How were you going to explain this? "What happened back in Busan?" Marcus asked. "Nothing just-... I was tired of him giving me those little nicknames so I gave him one to annoy him too! Yeah! That's it." You said, a nervous giggle afterwards. You hoped he didn't suspected anything.

Marcus nodded. "Alright then.." He said, dropping the topic. "And besides, Imagine. For so long the Choi's have been at the top of Korea's mafia. Once they're down we're the new number one. We'll finally stand at the top Marcus! How wonderful is that!" You told him enthusiastic. Marcus nodded. "That's... Indeed great!" You frowned your eyebrows. You expected Marcus to be the most enthusiastic out of the two of you. "Is everything alright?" You asked him.

He cleared his throat. "Huh? Oh, yeah, sure. I was just worried about you. What if something happens to you. I still can't trust that Hoseok guy." He said. You gave him a soft smile, placing your hand on top of his. "Don't worry Marcus. I got this." And with that you stood up and walked out. "By the way Marcus," You said, turning around one last time. "Can you go check how Taehyung's work is going and give me an update on it? It's quite important and I only trust you with it." You told him. He nodded. "Of course. I'll go check right away boss!"

When you came back to your room you were surprised that Hoseok was still there. It was like he never left. "I thought you would've already went off to go explore the place." You said as you walked in. Hoseok looked up at you. "Neah, not really. I rather stay here. It's quiet here." He said, laying back onto the bed.

You went to sit at the edge of the bed and looked outside the big window in your room. Suddenly you felt Hoseok's hand grabbing yours and to Hoseok's surprise you laced your fingers with his. He smiled, looking at your face as it looked beautiful to him with the current lighting coming from your windows. You hair already got a bit messy from walking around all over the place all day. You may have been a target for him at first but right now, the only thing he could think about calling you was his angel. That's how you looked in Hoseok's eyes like an angel still trapped into the claws of the devil... The mafia. If he only could get you out of this life and give you a better one. "Leave this place with me tonight."

You turned your head towards Hoseok as these words came out of his mouth. "What?" "You heard me." Hoseok said, sitting back up and sitting a bit closer towards you. "Leave this place with me. Y/n, I can see this is no life for you... I promise I can give you a better one." Hoseok said, looking deep into your eyes. You suddenly felt all naked, like Hoseok could look right through you and into your soul. It's not like you loved the mafia but it also wasn't like you hated it.

"How...?" You quietly asked. "I already told you it's not that easy..." You said, looking down at your still intertwined hands. "Let's just leave this place tonight. No one will know. And we'll see what happens afterwards." Hoseok pushed your chin back up with his free hand. "Look at me Y/n. Do you trust me?" Hoseok asked.

You thought for a second, nervously chewing on your lip. Eventually you nodded your head. You knew you couldn't deny anymore what was happening between you and Hoseok. You knew it all went quick but there was just this sparkle between you and from today on you couldn't unseen it anymore.

Hoseok smiled at your response. "Good. So please Y/n, please come with me." He said, leaning in closer and delicately kissing your lips. You nodded. "A-alright. Let's get out of here tonight. But... I can't leave Taehyung here behind. I need him to go with us. He's my best friend Hope... We grew up together."

Hoseok looked you into the eyes while playing with your hand. "You're sure you can trust him enough to let him come with us?" He asked and you nodded. "I'm a hundred percent sure of it." Hoseok nodded. "Ok then. Go tell him. We'll leave at 3am. Everyone should be asleep by then."

And so as planned you went to speak to Taehyung. You told him the plan and of course he supported you in your decision. He was glad you asked him to go with you. He joked around saying' if Hoseok didn't take you away from here I would'. You laughed at him but then he started to question you about Hoseok and then the blushing and stuttering came. Of course, as the good friends you are, you told him about how you felt something towards the boy but wasn't quiet sure jet but it just felt right. As last you also talked about who the son of the Choi's could be but Taehyung only said it was difficult and he didn't knew yet.

After your little chat with Taehyung and bumping into Marcus inside the hall you were finally back in your room, making everything ready together with Hoseok. "Go get some rest Y/n." Hoseok said, packing the last of your things. You didn't intended to take much with you but no matter what Hoseok insisted he would help you pack. With the small bag finally packed you lay down onto the bed, staring up at the ceiling. You heard Hoseok close the zipper of the back before feeling the mantras getting heavy next to you. "I am surprised I'm doing this... A few days ago I wouldn't even have thought of escaping this life. I was so focused on making my parents proud..." You said before scooping a bit closer towards Hoseok, resting your head on his shoulder while he wrapped his arms around you. "No matter what you do, I think your parents will always be proud of you Y/n. Now go sleep. You got a few hours." He said, kissing the top of your head.

"Goodnight Hope."

"Goodnight Y/n."

While you slept Hoseok didn't close an eye. He stayed awake all night, staring at you and also keeping the guard. He knew it may be foolish of him but there was someone in this house Hoseok didn't trust. And that was Marcus. Marcus had always been a strange figure in Hoseok's eyes and today it only got worse.

Hoseok lied to you when you asked him if he stayed in your room the whole time you were gone. In fact, Hoseok went to look for Taehyung. He had something in mind and the only one that could confirm it was him.

"Taehyung, can you look into someone for me?" Hoseok asked as he walked into Taehyung's office. "Who do you need me to look for?" The guy asked, looking at him from behind his desk. "I want you to get some research done on that Marcus guy."

Taehyung looked at him in shock. "Marcus? Why?" He asked, genuinely confused. "I don't trust him at all and I need to confirm something..." Hoseok said, standing behind Taehyung, looking at the screens.

"Marcus has been friends with Y/n's father for so long. Why wouldn't you trust him?" Taehyung said. "You don't think that-" Taehyung broke his own sentence into a silence as he finally understood what Hoseok was looking for. Hoseok nodded. "I think he's our man."

And just like he had thought Taehyung confirmed it that evening. Marcus was indeed the person you guys had been looking for. He was the son of the one and only Mr. Choi. But what would the son of a filthy rich mafia boss do in their enemies house? Hoseok could only think of one thing...

Then a bullet shot through the window and got caught by the opposite wall. Hoseok shook you awake. "Y/n wake up! Plans have changed, we need to go now!" You immediately woke up and you both stood up from the bed, only to hear another two gunshots. You both quickly laid flat on the ground. "W-what is that?" You asked, still halve asleep and confused. "They're here to kill you Y/n."

"What?!" You asked confused. "Who would possibly want to kill me?!" Again shots and Hoseok pulled you with him inside your closet. No windows there so the shutters don't know where to shoot anymore. Then a door opened giving you the answer to your question. "Well, hello hello!"

You looked at Hoseok in shock recognising the voice. Was that Marcus?! Hoseok put his finger in front of his lips telling you to not make any noise.

"Where are you little princess? I know you're somewhere in here~" Marcus said as you heard him walk around the room. "I know your lover boy is with you too." He said.

"You know... I wished things would've gone other ways but you just leave me no choice Y/n. You're just like your father." He said before shooting at the ceiling, making you jump a bit.

But what did he mean, just like your father? "You know the day your father died... It was my doing. He tried to escape too and just like you now, he left me no choice but to kill him right there and then."

You placed your hand over your mouth in shock. Your body was trembling while tears were threatening to leave your eyes. Marcus killed your father? But why would he ever do that? They were like best friends. Hoseok took your trembling body in his arms, shushing you quietly while he was eagerly looking for a way out of here.

Marcus started to speak again. "I know you're probably wondering... 'Oh why did you kill my daddy Marcus? Weren't you like best friends?' " Marcus said, trying to imitate your voice. "Well dear, It may look like we were friends but I am his worst nightmare. Your worst nightmare!" You heard him push a closet on the ground, making a hella loud noice. "You know who I am Y/n? Why doesn't Hoseok tell you, huh?" You looked at Hoseok confused. What would he know you didn't? "I am Marcus Choi. The son of the biggest, most feared mafia boss." Then a maniac laughter could be heard from him. "Wasn't it a great idea from me to infiltrate your little mafia and bring it down? After the accident happened everyone thought I died but I didn't, what caused me to be in the most ideal position. I thought when your father died I finally made an end to the Lee's but then you showed up from your house in the US and took over!" This time a vase could be heard shattering onto the ground. "Of course daddy's little girl had to take over business! Now where are you Y/n! Cut the crab and come out already!" Marcus yelled.

Hoseok slammed the door open as on clue and run with you towards the door as Marcus tried to shoot at the both of you. Luckly no bullet caught you. Or so you thought... "Hoseok! Your shoulder!" You said while you were running through the halls. "I'm alright. We need to get to Taehyung first to warn him and then get the hell out of here." He said. You looked at his shoulder and let go of his hand. "You'll need your hand to put pressure on that wound." You said.

"WHERE ARE YOU, YOU BITCH!!"

You quickly opened the door and ran into Taehyung's room as you heard Marcus yell from upstairs. "Taehyung!" You yelled as you run towards him and hugged him. He hugged you back. "I heard gunshots, what's happening?" He asked, letting go of you. Then he looked at Hoseok and his arm that was covered in blood. "Fuck that looks bad..." He said. "Is it Marcus?!" He asked and Hoseok nodded. "He somehow must have heard us talking about escaping. We need to go now."

"COME OUT COME OUT WHEREVER YOU ARE!"

Marcus voice could be heard closer and closer. "He's getting near." You said. The panic could be seen in your eyes as you looked at the two boys. "You two need to get out of here as fast as possible." Taehyung said. "And what about you?!" You asked and he gave you a soft smile. "We can't escape with all of us. Marcus knows this place too well. He'll catch onto us in no time. You go and I'll distract him."

"But what if he hurts you like he did to Hoseok?!" You asked concerned. "Don't worry about me Y/n. I'll be alright. I always am in the end. Just trust me ok?" Leave the house and I'll make sure you escape safely." He said.

"He's right Y/n. We got to go now." Hoseok said as he pulled at your arm. You gave Taehyung one last glance. He smiled and nodded, like he was saying 'it's alright. It's all gonna be fine.' And so you trusted him on that and left with Hoseok through the front door.

"THERE YOU ARE!" Marcus yelled from the top of the stairs aiming his gun towards you but shot into the door because Hoseok could close it on time. A tear left your eye as you thought of Taehyung being inside there with that maniac. You were so scared of what Marcus could do to Taehyung. Then you saw the house go into lockdown. You knew this was Taehyung's doing and it was also a sign for you and Hoseok to leave.

"Where are your cars Y/n?" Hoseok asked. "Right there, behind that corner." you told him as you both ran towards the garages. You opened one and got inside the car as fast as possible, Hoseok behind the steering wheel. "Buckle up!" He said and then started the engine. But before you could ride away a shot was heard. You both looked at the side, it was Marcus. Somehow he managed to escape the house and he just shot one of your tiers. This was no good. "You both looked at him in shock as he aimed the gun towards you two again. Fear in both of your eyes this time as you had no where to run to now. You were so scared knowing this could be your last moment.

You still had so many things you wanted to do. You want to stop this mafia shit, make more times to spend with friends and family and most important of all, start a new better life with the one you loved... Hoseok. As you were so concentrated you didn't saw Taehyung stumble out of the house all beaten up by the hooligan in front of you.

You closed your eyes in fear of what would come and then it finally came. Two gunshots could be heard.

...But strangely they never reached you nor Hoseok. You opened your eyes again and saw Marcus coughing up blood before falling down onto the floor. Someone had shot him. Then from everywhere around the building and bushes men with guns appeared. Hoseok rushed out of the car and towards the men. You looked at your saviours in shock as Hoseok talked to them about something. Two persons went to check on the corps while Hoseok looked back and forth between you and then one he was taking to.

You decided to get out of the car as well and with small steps you walked towards Hoseok. He gave you a soft smile and then took you into a tight hug. "It's alright. It's all over now." He shushed you while caressing your hair as you cried into his chest from the chock and all the stress you had been going through tonight.

"Who is this Seok?" The man that was standing with Hoseok earlier asked. "This is Y/n. She was one of the people captured here by Marcus." Hoseok said. "I see... Can you both come testify one by one in a while?" The man asked. "Sheff, can we do it together? I don't think she's in a state to handle this on her own now." Hoseok stated and the guy nodded. "I give you 15min to calm down a bit. Come inside afterwards.

Once the guy left Hoseok let go off you and took a step back to look at you. "It's alright. Just take some deep breaths." You did as Hoseok said and it calmed you down a bit. "Now, I want you to let me speak when we get inside for the interrogation. If they know you're the boss of this whole mafia you hang." "They will put me in prison?!" You asked in shock and Hoseok shock his head. "No, no, no. I won't let that ever happen princess. Just let me do the talking and everything will be alright, ok?" He said and you nodded. "Ok.." "Good."

"Now... How did all these men come here?" You asked, confused on how Hoseok's men suddenly found your house. "I called them in. When you were talking to Marcus I went to Taehyung to search a bit more information about the man."

"You already knew... You didn't trusted him from the start." You said and Hoseok nodded. "I didn't trusted him indeed but I didn't knew. Well... I wasn't sure yet. So that's why I needed proof. Thanks to Taehyung's help I got it. I contacted my boss afterwards. I told them my location and everything they needed to know. My plan was to get you out first so they could storm in and clear this mess without you having to worry about it. I didn't knew he would come and try to kill you first..." Hoseok said, looking down. "I wanted to capture him to get to the Choi's as originally planned but then the shots and he tried to murder you and-"

"ssh," You said, placing your hands on both of Hoseok's cheeks. He looked up at you and you placed your forehead carefully against his. He calmed down a bit, taking a deep breath. "I'm here Hope. I'm right here. I'm still alive thanks to you. You did good by calling your troops here. Thank you for saving me." You said, smiling at him and he smiled back.

You took a deep breath yourself before both going inside for your interrogation. Like you discussed earlier outside Hoseok did the talking. He had to lie a bit for that but it was necessary to not get you in prison. He told them Marcus killed your dad and captured you afterwards. He told them Marcus took over and then caught him too. When you tried to escape today Marcus tried to kill you both and then the troops came in. That's the story Hoseok told the police. "Can you confirm this Ms. Lee?" The agent interrogating you asked. You nodded. "Yes it is. I have been captured by that battered for years until Hoseok finally came and saved me." You said, Hoseok squeezing your hand under the table as if wanting to tell you 'good job'.

After all that happened that day you still had to find a good story for Taehyung. After that was all done and Taehyung was completely healed again you and Hoseok decided to live together. Taehyung was so happy for the both of you. The only thing he ever wanted was to see his best friend happy and now he knew you finally were.

"Guess who?"

You laughed as you knew who these hands and voice belonged too. "Hoseok, we're the only one in the house right now. Of course it's you." You said giggling. It had been a year since what happened with Marcus and right now you were living happily with Hoseok in a villa at the beautiful coast of Italy.

Hoseok took his hands from around your eyes and went to sit next to your legs onto the sunbed you were currently on. You put off your sunglasses and looked at the man in front of you as he leaned in closer for a kiss. For the ones asking, yes you and Hoseok were a pair. A month after everything that happened and after recovering from the chock for a while Hoseok finally asked you to be his and without hesitating you said yes. And so you now both lived happily in each other's presence.

"I got a surprise for you." Hoseok said, pulling back from the kiss and smiling at you. He then pulled an envelope from behind his back. "What is that?" You asked. "Open it." He said, giving you the envelope. You opened it and pulled out two tickets for... "The opera? Is this real?!" Hoseok smiled and nodded. You wrapped your arms around him and hugged him tightly. "Thank you so so so muchhhh!!" You said while hugging him happily. In that year of living together Hoseok slowly dithered out your love for opera and classical music so one day when he sat behind his computer he decided to get you a little present. "See it as an early birthday gift." Hoseok said as you let go of him and kissed him full on the lips. He laughed as he kissed you back, loving to see you so happy.

"It's tonight so I suggest you go pick a nice dress to wear because I know if I don't tell you now you'll take ages." You playfully hit his chest while he laughed. "It's true tho! Now go get ready, we leave at 6." He said. You stood up and got a smack onto your ass. "Yah-" You turned around and looked at him. He smiled and just put on his sunglasses laying down onto the sunned you payed on earlier, smirk on his face. "Go get ready! The longer you take the later it will get."

Once you and Hoseok were ready it was indeed almost time. "Told you, you always take a long time in the bathroom." Hoseok said, kissing your naked shoulder as he wrapped his arms around your waist. He checked you out through the mirror in front of you. "You look beautiful in that red off shoulder dress." He said and you smiled at him, kissing his cheek. "Thanks love. You don't look that bad yourself in that black suit with red tie." You turned around and playfully pulled on his tie, pulling him closer so you could kiss his lips. He kissed back, pushing you a bit backwards against the sink of your bathroom. "We should stop now or we won't even make it to the opera." Hoseok said, pulling away from you.

He did a step backwards and reached his arm towards you. "My lady," He said playfully. You laughed and wrapped your arm around his as you both walked out of the house and towards the car.

Once in the opera house Hoseok saw that sparkle in your eyes and it filled him with love and admiration for you. You looked so happy and it made him happy too. "Look how beautiful and classy it looks here! Wah." You said as you walked towards the giant stairs. "Did you knew that 'common people' always needed to sit at the low levels and that the rich sat at their private balcony? Until now it are still the most expansive places in the house." You told him, already walking towards the door that lead you towards the lower levels assuming your seats were there.

"Where do you think you're going?" Hoseok asked, pulling you back. "I'm going towards our seats?" You said questionable. "What else?"

Hoseok pulled you with him and onto the stairs. "Hoseok-" You said, looking at him in disbelieve while he pulled you with him up the stairs. "My princess only deserves the best." He said, kissing the top of your head before walking further through the hall on the second floor.

He opened a door with Hoseok's name written on and just like in every opera house there was your private balcony. "You really paid for all of this?!" You asked surprised while walking onto the small balcony, looking down at the podium a bit further. Hoseok went to stand behind you and held you as he admired the opera house with you.

You really were surprised at how he managed to pay for this. After leaving the mafia you of course also had to leave all the money behind. Mafia wasn't really legal so the money went towards the government who would do it's thing with it. You were already shocked at him Hoseok managed to buy the villa in Italy you were currently living in and now these expensive opera tickets?

"My job pays quite well Y/n. I think you sometimes underestimate my job as a secret agent love." He said, kissing your nape before letting go of you and sitting down in one of the chairs. "Come sit with me love." You went to sit down and as if on clue the lights dimmed and the show started.

"This was so good Hoseok! I loved it so much!" You said enthusiastically. The whole car it back home you couldn't stop talking about everything that evening. From the beautiful building to the lovely voice of the sopranos. He felt like he just took a little girl towards Disneyland, mesmerised by the many fairytales around her. That's how it felt with you right now. "Cute..." He mumbled as he opened the door for you.

Once you walked inside you saw something you didn't expected. The floor was covered with rose petals and on every closet or chair were cadges lighting the way towards the living room. You turned around towards Hoseok in shock. "Did- Did you do all this?" You asked him and he gave you a bright smile nodding. "I hope you like it." He said and you nodded. "Are you kidding?! I love it! Hope... You're so sweet." You said, a tear leaving your eyes.

Hoseok wrapped you in your arms letting out a soft chuckle. "Oh baby, don't cry now." He wipes the tear away that fell out of your eye. "This is supposed to be a happy day." He told you. You smiled through your tears. "It's just that- You're just so sweet Hobi, you're amazing and so kind and caring towards me. I can't help it." You said.

Hoseok softly kissed your lips. "It's alright love. I like doing cute and sweet stuff for you. Seeing you happy makes me happy. You know that. The only thing I want is for you to feel loved." He said. He turned you around, holding your hand. "Now go walk a bit further. I got another surprise for you." You gave him a questionable look before walking further.

"T-Taehyung?!" You run towards him and unfolded him into a tight hug. "You're here. You're really here!" When you left Korea Taehyung didn't. He decided to stay, going back to his family and live there for a while, while he would try finding a new job. You thought you would never see him again and here he was, right in your arms.

"Did you set this all up?!" You asked, pulling away from your arms. The boy laughed and nodded. "How did you manage to do all this?" You asked, looking around the room. There were red, pink and white balloons hanging at the ceiling, small red paper hearts were covering the curtains and of course the many candles and rose petals all over the place. "Thank you so much for this. Both of you. This is so cute." You said, your hands on your chest as you looked at the two boys and the work they pulled off.

"Oh, where are my manners." You said, fanning your head. "Sit down Tae! It's been so long. I wanna talk and know everything that happen with you while I was gone. You want something to drink?"

Taehyung laughed and stopped you. "It's alright Y/n. You don't need to do all this." He gave you a sweet smile. "Besides, this evening is supposed to be only you and Hoseok. I stay here for two weeks so enough time to talk later. You go and enjoy your night with your manz." Taehyung said, raising his eyebrows and taking his jacket off of the couch. "I'll leave you alone now. Have a great night guys!" He said, winking and smirking at you as he passed by. "See you tomorrow!"

You laughed as he left the place. "Aish that little-" You said as you watched him leave. Hoseok stood behind you again to hug you. He loved giving back hug's a lot lately. Even while you were sleeping he would always spoon you. "Baby?" Hoseok called out your name while he placed his head on your shoulder. "Let's do what Taehyung said and make this night ours." Hoseok said. "And how are you planning to do that Mister Jung?" You asked your boyfriend teasingly.

He took a deep breath. "I don't know yet Misses Jung." You turned around and looked at him in shock. In the past year he had never used his last name to address you until now. "Misses Jung?" He nodded and smiled taking a step backwards and suddenly going down on one knee. Your hands went to cover your mouth in chock. Was this real? Was he really just... proposing to you?

Hoseok pulled a small box out of his pocket and opened it. "Y/n Lee, what would you think of becoming Misses Jung? Will you marry me?" He asked sweetly. He was smiling but you knew inside he was very nervous. So you didn't made him wait long and started nodding your head. "Yes, a thousand times yes. I would love to become your wife Hope." You said and Hoseok's smile widened even more as he stood up again and held you close, his lips meeting yours into a soft but passionate kiss. "You have no idea how happy you make me right now." He said, kissing you over and over again.

You were expected to get the ring around your finger but Hoseok just tossed the box onto the couch and picked you up bridle style. You gasped as he swept you from your feet quite literally. "Let's go celebrate this upstairs, shell we?" He asked and you giggled, caressing his cheek and nodding, kissing his lips as he carried you both upstairs towards your room.

"I love you Hope."

"I love you too, Y/n. My miss mafia."

[loveyhoneydovey]

SFW Alphabet with Joaquín Torres

Note: I've been dying to write something like this so I decided to do it with my baby first. Might do Sam next

All my stories are written with a bisexual reader of colour in mind, but anyone else is more than welcome to read them

Joaquín Torres x GN!Reader

A = Affection (How affectionate are they? How do they show affection?)

He’s a very affectionate partner and especially shows his love through physical affection and acts of service. He wants to feel useful and do his best to make life easier and more enjoyable for you.

B = Best friend (What would they be like as a best friend? How would the friendship start?)

He’d be the type of best friend that’s not physically there often, due to the nature of his job. However, when you do get a chance to spend it feels like he’s never been gone. He completely focuses on you, asks for updates about your life and checks if you need anything. He’s so chill and he’s got the type of personality that has you at ease. You first met him at a mutual friend’s wedding, you both got a bit tipsy and decided to hang out with each other and that was the start of a beautiful friendship

C = Cuddles (Do they like to cuddle? How would they cuddle?)

YES!!! As I previously mentioned, he loves physical touch and cuddling is one of his favourite ways of showing affection. He loves being the small spoon and he’s not ashamed to say it. He says it’s because you make him feel safe and makes him feel like he has a home to go back to after all the shit he sees

D = Domestic (Do they want to settle down? How are they at cooking and cleaning?)

He wants to settle down for sure, eventually. Before meeting you, he thought that would come later, but you definitely made him rethink. I don’t think he’s the best cook, but I think he has a few of recipes of food his mom made him when he was younger. Those are the ones he learned to perfect. As for cleaning, because of how strict his life is at the army, I think he allows himself to be a bit messy at home. Definitely messy and not dirty. You both try to split house chores evenly.

E = Ending (If they had to break up with their partner, how would they do it?)

I think he’d be honest and would do it in person. Ending a relationship that played such an important part in his life is definitely heartbreaking, but he thinks he owes it to himself and to you to put an end to it before it gets worse. He’d rather end things on semi good terms than letting it sour and go nowhere.

F = Fiancé(e) (How do they feel about commitment? How quick would they want to get married?)

He always told himself, when it came to relationships, he’d go with the flow and see how he felt about long-term commitment. He’s a m*ilitary boy, so I think he kinda (unintentionally) follows the stereotype and proposes quickly. Although in his case he does it because he’s truly in love with you and doesn’t want to wait longer than he has to make you his. He’d propose after about a year and a half I’d say.

G = Gentle (How gentle are they, both physically and emotionally?)

Have you seen him? He’s the gentlest sweetest baby in every way. I think the fact that he sees so much violence and horror during his deployment pushes him to be more gentle in other aspects of his life. More specifically with you and his family. He wants you to feel like you can come to him for anything whether it’s when you’re feeling down or when you’ve cut your finger on a piece of glass. Either way he’ll treat you with kindness, but not like you’re breakable.

H = Hugs (Do they like hugs? How often do they do it? What are their hugs like?)

omg he LOVES hugs. Again, due to the nature of his job, he doesn’t get a lot of physical affection, which drives him crazy. So when he’s home, you can expect him to attack you with hugs all day long. Doesn’t matter if you’re washing the dishes or brushing your teeth. He’ll come up from behind and wrap his arms around your waist, while putting his chin on your shoulder. If you’re facing him, he’s going to engulf you and wrap his arms around you. His hugs are warm and comforting and make you feel safe.

I = I love you (How fast do they say the L-word?)

oh real quick, but actually so do you. I actually headcanon that you two say it at the same time by accident. You both were probably nervous because it was after like two months, but end up laughing it off cause you were so in sync.

J = Jealousy (How jealous do they get? What do they do when they’re jealous?)

He understands the root of jealousy is mostly insecurity, so he doesn’t get jealous often, because he’s secure in his relationship with you and is actually pretty confident with himself. Of course, it happens occasionally, he’s only human. However, you both always thought that feeling jealous sometimes wasn’t bad, but what could lead to issues was the way one could act on it. So, whenever he feels jealous he takes a moment to collect his thoughts if he needs to, then you’d both talk about it.

K = Kisses (What are their kisses like? Where do they like to kiss you? Where do they like to be kissed?)

His kisses are often playful and sweet. He doesn’t like to take himself too seriously and neither do you, so you keep things light and playful, but that doesn’t mean it’s not passionate. On the contrary, you feel his love for you with every kiss he leaves on you skin. His favourite place to kiss you is on the nose, because of the way you scrunch it and giggle after he kisses it. As for where he liked to be kissed, soon after you started dating, you found out he loved being shirtless which allowed you to notice he had a beauty mark on the upper part of his right shoulder. From that moment, you developed a habit of kissing it and it made him melt, so it became his favourite place to be kissed.

L = Little ones (How are they around children?)

Oh the BEST. For some reason he attracts them. You told him it was probably because he was a child himself and he flipped you off. You actually think it’s because he’s so cheerful and happy, and he treats them like they’re his friends. You’ve caught him having full on conversations with your friends’ babies who couldn’t even speak yet. And once you had kids, he did the same thing with them.

M = Morning (How are mornings spent with them?)

Whenever possible, you have lazy mornings where you alternate between sleeping, having lazy morning sex and snacking. If it’s a regular morning, he usually has to leave before you, and every time you’d try to distract him and make him stay a bit longer. He’s so used to your “five more minutes, please” that he started waking up five minutes earlier.

N = Night (How are nights spent with them?)

This man has a whole skincare routine before going to sleep. If you also do, then you both complete your routines side by side in front of the bathroom mirror. He might read a bit before bed (and you try to sneakily take a pic of him in his glasses cause you think he looks so cute), or you’d both talk about your day and maybe cuddle a bit before turning off your lamps and getting some sleep.

O = Open (When would they start revealing things about themselves? Do they say everything all at once or wait a while to reveal things slowly?)

He’d open up slowly, there was no pressure between the two of you and he took his time to share the more difficult parts of his life. Now if you open up to him about something defining or traumatic that happened in your life, he might open up faster to let you know you’re not alone, but also to reciprocate the trust you put in him.

P = Patience (How easily angered are they?)

He’s pretty patient most of the time and tries to not let himself get angry over little things, however he’s still human. So depending on the gravity of the situation, he might get angered quickly if he sees something upsetting happening, however, he’s very careful with the way he reacts. He knows something done in anger can lead to regret and guilt, so he thinks before he acts and speaks.

Q = Quizzes (How much would they remember about you? Do they remember every little detail you mention in passing, or do they kind of forget everything?)

I think he’d remember an important date like your birthday, he knows around what time your anniversary is, but I feel like he would forget which date it is exactly. He’d remember the most random facts about you, like the kind of stuff where you think he was paying attention, but he was listening subconsciously.

R = Remember (What is their favorite moment in your relationship?)

Cliché, but it was during your honeymoon. It was the first time you had referred to him as your husband and it made his heart swell with pride. The love you held for him was so obvious when you looked at him.

S = Security (How protective are they? How would they protect you? How would they like to be protected?)

He’s protective when he needs to be. He’s not overbearing and trusts that you’re capable of taking care of yourself most of the time. He will step in if he feels like a situation is escalating (let’s say if you’re getting physically or verbally harassed) and he will put himself physically between you and whoever’s trying to harm you.

T = Try (How much effort would they put into dates, anniversaries, gifts, everyday tasks?)

Omg listen this baby puts so much effort into making your dates enjoyable. He plans out full picnics with cute cakes and charcuterie boards and that doesn’t stop as your relationship progresses. Any gifts he gives you usually have a meaning behind them, and he doesn’t always buy them, sometimes he makes them himself. As I said, he is a bit messy in his daily life, but you two actually have a chart with who’s supposed to do what and that’s how you share your chores, and he does mostly follow it.

U = Ugly (What would be some bad habits of theirs?)

He has a habit of leaving some important stuff until the last minute. It works out in the end, but it causes him an unnecessary amount of stress.

V = Vanity (How concerned are they with their looks?)

… have you seen the amount shirtless selfies Danny takes? I think Torres is the exact same. So, he does like to take care of his looks, especially when he sees the effect it has on you. And he has to stay in shape either way, due to his job

W = Whole (Would they feel incomplete without you?)

I think he’d be heartbroken and might feel incomplete for the first few months, but as time goes one, he begins to feel whole again and learns to feel self sufficient.

X = Xtra (A random headcanon for them.)

He wants to learn another language fluently someday. He wants to help people and he thinks there’s no better way than being able to understand their needs in their native language to be able to help

Y = Yuck (What are some things they wouldn’t like, either in general or in a partner?)

I think he doesn’t like the smell of cigarettes or smoke. He doesn’t mind if his partner’s a smoker, but he probably wouldn’t be around them while they’re smoking.

Z = Zzz (What is a sleep habit of theirs?)

This boy sleeps in the weirdest, funniest positions. Like you’d go to sleep in a normal position side by side, or with your back to him, then when you’d wake up you’d find him in a new position every time.