#But anyway I'm scared and I just needed to vent a bit so yeah

[moonchild-in-blue]

Oh.

[amberhum]

on this year i tried my best to change my ways and to keep working on myself but as the time goes i cannot stop to notice the fact that i may be repeating another cycle in which i must learn to embrace my solitude at the expense of not showing my authentic self to the world and at the same time i also experience a deep feeling of not belonging anywhere

and if i hear one more time "oh i thought you were intimidating/mean" or "i was scared to approach you/you look unaproachable" i'm going to scream from the top of my lungs :i'm trying so hard!!! no matter how warm i make myself to be it doesn't come off as much as i would like to so i get labeled as cold and bitchy and is literally not the case most of the time oh my god

[allthehumanflaws]

The Umbrella Academy S4

If you haven't completed season 4 please don't read any further

This is my complete rant- I just ughhh ohkay

So the ending huh I don't even know what to say. I don't know what that was. Was it just me or did someone else also presume that Viktor would be the one dying?? Why did all of them die? It seems so rushed. Just 5 minutes between Five realizing what's gonna happen and what they need to do and then just bam it's over i'm sorry what the fuck- I had so much hope and thrill and passion going into this season all doomed.

Don't even get me started on the Five and Lila thing. hey stevie when some of the people said they'd like to see a number five romantic subplot...... THIS IS NOT WHAT THE MEANT!?!? You're tryna tell me Five "survived 45 years in an apocalypse killed hundreds and thousands of people and the board of directors of a deadly commission just to get back to his family and keep them safe" Hargreeves the Five Hargreeves who had many a year and opportunity to find himself a woman after joining the commission but stayed loyal to a fucking mannequin fell in love with his brother's wife after 7 years of being stuck with her? SPECIALLY after he specially told Diego that Lila wouldn't throw all that away he fell in love with her and was heartbroken when she didn't throw that away????? What of the frenemy dynamic? What of the 'you killed my parents in cold blood' part of that equation? All gone cause of what? I see no point or use of that in the already fucked storyline? I don't even know what to say.

Luther had NO character this season. He's just a big soft bag of fluff I mean i don't hate that not at all but like... and his powers were just reduced to what... accidentally breaking an alarm clock and jumping of a stage into a crowd of women? yay i guess. And WHERE WAS SLOANE? WHAT HAPPENED TO HER?

Klaus oh my poor heart- a germaphobe. Really a germaphobe? Of all the things he could've been. When the grave scene happened where they were shooting outside and he covered his ears I got so excited like yes yes Vietnam Klaus... I mean yeah he's traumatized but I thought they'd work with that even just a little bit but no. None of that just terrified of ghosts druggie Klaus.

Allison Hargreeves - I have a vent about her already posted. And there it seems I hate her and maybe a little yeah but that means there was like a pacific load of area they could've worked with but no? none of that. She is just back to normal a little scared but that's all. "Since Ray walked out!" THAT"S ALL WE GET FROM RAYMOND CHESTNUT!? What why how when under what conditions??????????? Nothing?? Huff man. I know this is too much for one season and I know they couldn't have included everything in one season but they had such a great show. Such a brilliant show. Season 3 was a very apt ending. It was perfect to be very honest, this is just uncalled for. All the characters are so not who we as viewers were shown for 3 seasons which is why I feel it feels more like a disappointment. Yeah without their powers they'd be different, but they're just not them anymore.... Anyway I should probably sleep.

Tell me what you think of all this :)

[joanvisitsrome]

stars between us - ch.7 - h.c

I am actually so sorry for the wait. I've had some serious writer's block writing this, and then also have been so busy these past few days. I have decided to write an epilogue for this, since I'm literally having so many problems with parting with this series. I promise though, only 2 more chapters. Next chapter is the smut chapter btw 🤭 As usual, comment to be on the taglist, and feel free to send in requests!

Summary: You and Hazel embark on your first real date.

Contains: Fluff, light teasing, slight angst, hazel venting a bit, justin beiber reference, romeo and juliet reference, tybalt reference

I am genuinely so sorry for the amount of outside references in this. I think we can tell I genuinely had a lot of fun writing this. Yes, I know about french tybalt. And yes, i googled how many times they say Baby in the song baby.

You and Hazel agree to go out to dinner Friday night, and then hang out at her house after. Still fairly in shock from the day’s events, you make sure that Hazel wants this. After all, she had voiced how concerned she was to start something more than friendship.

“We’ll never know if we try,” she had said, head laying on your chest. “I kissed you because I realized that I was playing it too safe.” You nod, showing that you’re listening to Hazel while stroking her hair. She snuggles into your chest as you scratch her scalp.

“This is quite nice,” Hazel admits, “I haven’t felt this attended to in so long. It started about a year before my parents’ divorce. When they started fighting. And then they split up, and both were too hurt to help me. And now, my mom’s fucking Jeff, even though, that’s like, fucking illegal.”

“Well I’m gonna stay and take care of you whenever you need it. Okay, Haze?” you give her a soft kiss on the forehead before seeing the clock.

“I’ve got to go, but I’ll see you tomorrow, okay Haze?” you sit up on the bed and hold her hand.

“Yeah. I’ll walk you out.” Hazel walks you to your car, and makes sure you exit her driveway safely, waving as you exit her driveway.

The next few days at school go quite well. You sit with Hazel at lunch, discussing everything under the sun. Of course, you both had to endure a number of teasing exchanges from the rest of the fight club, from knowing smirks shot across the lunchroom, to kissing noises whenever the two of you walked by anyone in the fight club. They all knew that you and Hazel had the hots for each other, even though neither of you had said a word to anyone. You both agreed that it would be better for the both of you, and the sake of your relationship, whether that meant you got together or stayed friends, that your friends had no say in it. Which meant not talking about anything that had happened recently. They already knew enough from the camping trip anyway.

On Thursday night, Hazel comes over your house to study for a quiz the two of you had in Mr. G’s class the next day. After ‘studying,’ and totally not just saying a bunch of bullshit to each other, since Mr. G’s class was a joke, and the two of you didn’t want to study, the two of you got entangled in another make-out session. You straddled Hazel’s hips again, pulling her closer to you by her chains, as she held your waist, rubbing it with her thumbs. You didn’t realize it, but you were moaning in between kisses, but Hazel took large notice. She began to slip a few of her fingers under your shirt, testing the waters. To be honest, Hazel didn’t know how to respond to this, and was too scared to point it out, worried you may find her inexperienced.

“Hey, is this okay?” she says, out of breath. You don’t even realize that Hazel has begun to slip a few fingers under your shirt.

“Maybe not today, if that’s okay? I’d rather us be in a relationship before we started doing this.” you motion to Hazel’s hands, still holding on to your waist under your shirt. She quickly removed her hands and put her hands on your thighs, running them up and down slowly.

“I think that’ll be good. I’m glad you said that, since I was feeling that way too.” You give Hazel another kiss before getting off of her.

“Do you mind if I sleep here tonight? I think I saw my mom picking up Jeff after school today.”

“Of course Haze.” The two of you cuddle in your bed the whole night, tangled in the sheets. You have to admit, sleeping in Hazel’s arms sober feels amazing. You feel cared for and safe, causing you to fall asleep very quickly.

That Friday, the next day, school goes agonizingly slow. Minutes feel like hours, and hours feel like days. All you want is to go on your date with Hazel, and have a good time. That’s it. You daydream all day about your date, thinking out every single possible scenario. In case you two decide to be friends at the dinner? Check. In case you two make out in the back of her car? Check. In case you guys run into PJ stalking you two with binoculars? Check.

 You practically run to your car when the last bell finally rings. You take your time getting ready for Hazel, making sure every strand of your hair was in place, that your outfit looked good, and that you looked absolutely perfect. Hazel notified you earlier in the day that she would text you when she made it to your house. Until then, you paced in your room, thinking up your possible situations again. 

You receive a text from Hazel. i’m outside

You quickly grab your bag, take one last look in the mirror, and head outside, to see Hazel leaned up against her car. She’s wearing a white button-down shirt with small brown stripes going vertically, along with her signature bowler’s jacket, and black jeans. She straightens up seeing you, eyes widening at your beauty.

You truly were the most beautiful thing she had ever seen.

“You look… really nice,” she says while running around her car to open the door for you.

“You don’t look so bad yourself,” you reply wittingly as you get into the passenger’s seat.

“Do you like pasta?” Hazel asks, adjusting her seatbelt. You nod, already taking a huge breath of relief. This was already feeling a lot more natural than you thought it would. You begin to feel a lot more comfortable in mere minutes of the car ride. Hazel lets you know that she made a reservation at Olive Garden, to which you tell her was a great choice.

The whole car ride, you and Hazel spend your time talking about music, since Hazel had her playlist going. The two of you argue over who has the more superior music taste, spatting a few playful insults back and forth, and acting dramatically offended when the insult is pointed at each other.

“Would someone who has a superior music taste have Baby by Justin Beiber on their playlist?” you ask Hazel playfully.

“Yes! I believe that it’s a classic for our generation!”

“It says BABY fifty-six times! That’s not a classic!”

“Nuh uh!”

“Just admit it Hazel, you’ve got Beiber fever.” Hazel rolls her eyes, swatting her hand, as she pulls into the Olive Garden. She stops the car and runs around to open the door for you. You get out and hold Hazel’s hand after she clips her keys onto her carabiner.

The two of you are seated at a table for two, next to a wall. Hazel pulls out the chair for you, pushing you in before seating herself. The two of you order, and begin talking again. Much to your surprise, this is going quite normally. You expected things to be awkward, but it was almost like you two were meant to be together. Each thing you said to each other complimented the other perfectly, like two voices in harmony.

“You know, we’ve talked about me a lot tonight,” Hazel mentioned, “I want to learn more about you.” You nod, still chewing on your food.

“Ask away, Haze.”

“So other than reading and astronomy, are you into anything else?”

“Not really. I tend to just do things centered on that most of the time.”

“Well, what’s your favorite book?” Hazel asked, taking a sip of her water.

“I really enjoy Shakespeare’s Romeo and Juliet. I know it’s pretty basic, and maybe a bit weird, but I really like re-reading it.”

“Romeo and Juliet? Please tell me your favorite character is Tybalt, at least.”

“Of course it’s Tybalt! He’s literally so underrated!” you exclaim.

“Have you heard,” Hazel asks, her voice low, “of French drag Tybalt?”

“It’s like you’re reading my mind.” you say, laughing. You genuinely feel like Hazel just gets you in a way that no one really understands. Matching your energy, not laughing at you for your niche interests, but instead, supporting them. This date had gone a lot better than you had expected, that’s for sure.

“Hey, can I ask you something?” Hazel asks, during the car ride back to her house.

“Yeah, Hazel. What’s up?”

“Will you be my girlfriend? I know I said before that dating would ruin our friendship, but honestly, I haven’t been this happy in a long time. This date helped me realize that we really should be together. That, well, I truly want you to be my girlfriend, and that it’s not going to ruin anything.”

“I really want to be your girlfriend too, Haze.”

“So will you be my girlfriend?”

“Of course.” You say this while pulling into her house.

taglist: @at1nyzen@slaughtercarrie@sophia2414@canmargesimpson @sam-cooperrr @rubycruzin4abruzin

[kyojurismo]

Can I have an emergency request? I don't want to seem like I'm venting, but recently I feel like somethings wrong with my family. My mom works midnights by herself to support all of us, my dad has a breathing condition and cant work and lately they've been fighting so much more than they used to and bringing me and my brothers into it. They've been cursing each other out and my parents have always or at least for a long time been very Cristian so hearing them do that scares me. On top of that my mom is verbally abusive to me and my dad loves to guilt trip me and my brothers and they except me to pick sides and honestly I just can't wait till I've saved a enough and learned the language to move to another country. Today I was trying to catch up on some things and my parents where fighting and my mom stormed out of the house and drove off which she has never done and im just really scared and stressed now and I just want some comfort maybe with Giyuu, Sanemi, or Hantengus' clones (platonic or romantic) who get home and reader / S/O is just crying and struggling to breath because they're parents are constantly trying to bring reader into they're own problems and reader feels like everything is always their responsibility and they just break down

# sanemi shinazugawa & hantengu clones (sekido & aizetsu)

tags : gn!reader, soft sanemi, i’ve never written for the hantengu clones so if they seem ooc just ignore it lmao, angst, comfort, not proofread.

a/n : alright since the clones are a lot i decided to write for only two of them 😭 i hope that’s fine anyway… i’m sending you a big hug and i hope everything gets better <3

SANEMI SHINAZUGAWA

sanemi would help you calm down and invite you to breathe with him

that way you would feel a tiny bit better

then he would wipe your cheeks and fill you with sweet words, trying his best to get you to relax

then he would hold you close to his chest and ask you if you want to talk about it

he won’t judge you, just be there to comfort you the best he can

sanemi would caress your hair, your back, your face, peppering your face with kisses

“it’s gonna be okay, i promise,” he would whisper into your ear, holding you to his chest

SEKIDO

man would see red (lol) the moment he notices you crying

would get close to you and help you calm down

“yeah, breathe in and out like this.”

once you’re calm enough he would try his best to comfort you

reluctant but would hug you and caress your head slowly

“wanna talk about it?” his tone would be gentle even if he’s annoyed that someone or something made you cry

once you open up, he would lowkey think about murdering your parents ngl

he would hold you until you’re completely calmed and feel a bit better

AIZETSU

would probably cry with you while holding you into his arms

of course he would help you calm your breathing, as he doesn’t want to make you feel suffocated

he needs to make sure you’re comfortable with him holding you

“i’m so sorry darling, so sorry,” his voice is soft but full of sorrow (well)

i hc him to be super touchy so he would surely hold you close and keep his head close to yours

sometimes he would kiss your cheeks and look at you with tears in his eyes as you open up to him

“oh darling . . . i pity you,” he genuinely feels bad for your situation, “but i promise you it will be okay.”

reblogs & comments are super appreciated! thank you for taking your time reading it, i hope you enjoyed it. have a good day / night <3

[coolbeesbro]

Sometimes you work insanely hard on a project, and it doesn't pay off at all, and you just gotta learn to be ok with that. But I might have to halt doing artwork and writing for a bit while because I have a lot on my plate.

Right now I'm very much struggling to get by and have to worry about coming up with enough money to get much needed surgery done for my sibling's cat who's in my care due to personal circumstances. So while I'm stuck with that huge stressor over my head I really can't focus on much else besides penny pinching and thinking of literally anything I can do to get there at the moment.

Since none of my posts about commissions and sales seems to get likes or shares, when my other fan art related stuff gets decent traction (up until the last big project unfortunately) I can only assume Tumblr's algorithm stops the spread of any posts regarding sales and commissions. I'm honestly at the point I might do a 50% off all merch just to get something, but I know I probably still won't because Tumblr seems to hate people posting any form of advertising, so this post will also probably get lost as well.

Sorry for being a bit of a bummer, my head just isn't on right and I'm scared shitless I won't be able to get Kiwi the dental surgery she needs; and if I have to keep postponing it, it's gonna get infected, and where she's so old it could be fatal fast. She's started throwing up her food again last night (I feed her wet food that's watered down so she can sip it and not chew, which has been working for a bit), I can tell she's in pain, and there's nothing I can do about it but try and make things as comfortable for her as I can at this point.

I know this post will probably be seen by 1 person at best anyways, but at least I could vent a little. But yeah, all this to say I might go on hiatus for the next couple of weeks while I try and scrape up the remainder of the money needed for it; and if not I'll just be focusing on making her comfortable and hope if I have to push it off another month it won't become infected.

[1-ask-madoka-kaname-1]

Please do keep in mind that this blog is only for fun and should not be taken as canon!

Hello! I'm Kaname Madoka, you can just call me Madoka tho! :3

Welcome to my blog, hope you enjoy it here! ^_^

Before you go asking me stuff please do keep in mind I may be unable to answer some your questions, not because I don't want to but it might be too personal or I just don't have time or it's just a bit weird, so please be careful with what you say! >_<

Other then that don't be scared to ask me anything, I'd be more than happy to answer! ≧◡≦

{Ooc; Just a reminder that, Madoka is 14 so none of that weird shit, there will be headcanons so if some headcanons don't match yours then don't be upset cuz a real person is behind this blog, I also don't have a lot of experience running rp/askblogs so y'know

Anyway yeah headcanons will be below

-Madoka uses She/They

-Madoka loves cats and plan's on getting one

-Madoka's favorite pastry to bake and eat is cupcakes, she loves to decorate them

-Madoka really loves getting her friends gifts

-Madoka's favorite type of songs are: Upbeat music, depressing lyrics

-Madoka loves using emoticon's (e.g, :3 :D >_<)

{Ooc; Just some extra stuff, please don't vent in the askbox, if you really feel like you need too go to another blog that allows that, basically do the bare minimum and have some kind of decency if I feel forced too I will add a dni list and/or turn off anon, also no godmod like don't write her for me or whatever y'know

Also when ooc you can call me Blue or Silver idc which one, I go by He/They thumbs up emoji

I hope you enjoy your stay! (^▽^)

That is all for now, more will be added later as time progress's!

{Ooc; I wanted to put these images with the main stuff but I couldn't find a good place to put them so uh

{Ooc; Also if you don't know who Madoka is uh first off why are you here second watch Puella Magi Madoka☆Magica

[katsudondom]

I need to vent, sorry

long post incoming :)

↓

Yeah, I feel that I was born in the wrong generation

And no, I don't think I'm special or anything for saying that.

Like, do people think I want to feel like an outcast whenever I'm around a group of people that are the same age as me? Because I'd trade my interests and niches any day if it meant I could finally feel what it's like to have a group of friends by my side, or a partner holding my hand.

And yes, I do have many criticisms about certain aspects of modern technology and social media, but I don't downright hate it or dismiss the good that came from modern technology/the Internet entirely. If anything, I'd love to be born when the Internet was just starting to walk, when it wasn't as popular yet and when you were considered a nerd for even owning a computer. That'd be an amazing time to be alive, until "normies" (cant find a better word sorry I know it's cringe) started making the Internet more mainstream and later on it being the #1 reason why Americans are more stupid and self-centered then ever (in my personal opinion).

I'm more so disconnected with my generation because of the culture, not modern technology.. A generation where we believe in anything without doing any research or seeing different perspectives first, a generation that's easily brainwashed into believing anything, a generation that's so sure that their opinion is right that they'll even ruin someone else's life or ridicule them into oblivion just because the other person thinks differently. That's the reason why I feel like I don't belong with my generation, not because "ew social media".

Actually, that's not the whole reason why-

I also really just love the grunge/rock culture of the 90's, and the scene/emo culture of the early 2000's. It all felt like a community back then, like wherever you were at there'd be people accepting you with open arms, no matter who you were or what you looked like, ready to have you join their clique people that just liked the same shit as you do.

Nowadays, there doesn't even feel like a community anymore, even within your own culture. Everyone's divided, everyone's prejudice, and everyone can't put their differences aside and at least co-exist with each other. This "you're with me or against me" mentality is getting old real fast. Instead, let's have thoughtful and provoking conversations with each other, instead of being quick to go on social media and wishing ill to the white kid in your History class just because he wore a red hat that you happened to disagree with.

Idk, it's all just really silly.

I was just scrolling down watching YouTube when I saw a video calling people like me who think they're in the wrong generation "annoying" and I had to vent since it actually triggered me a bit, ngl, because just by looking at the thumbnail where they put a bunch of modern technologies and had "modern" in bold letters with the word being crossed out, I knew what points they were going to make, and I just needed to vent about how not everyone who feels like an outcast is trying so hard to be different.... It's 99% the complete opposite and I just always hated that stereotype from people who obviously have it way better in life, from people who clearly don't understand what it's like to be almost invisible even when you try so hard to be liked/seen to the point where you fantasize about a time you weren't even born in because "what if?".

Shit, I'm done, needed to get that off my chest and the only way I'd feel good about it is by posting it online. Scared to put tags on this because half of the criticisms about Gen Z that I wrote about relate to about 99% of Tumblr users, so I might piss someone off but fuck it, I want my voice to be heard and no one will probably care to read this anyway.

And yes, I know there's other teens/young adults out there like me, who has the same mindset as I do. I don't think that I'm the only special snowflake that feels this way, but it's so fucking hard finding someone who sees the world the same way as I do, that it does make me feel a bit like I am the only one.

Anyway,

Goodnight 🖤

[izzy-b-hands]

Rambling abt the half dream half nightmare that woke me up today below the cut. feel free to ignore, just need to vent it out somewhere. Probably going to include me talking abt Current Family Issues and Feelings so. yeah. TW for mentions of someone in hospital, death, religion, and overall family dysfunction lmao

I know that ultimately, right now, if something big and/or terrible happened medically to anyone in my family back in ND, I wouldn't be able to go see them. The money just isn't there (part of why I'm not going out there this summer nor are they coming out here at all.) I've accepted it, and I try not to think abt it.

That said, LOVE (read: HATE) my brain deciding a hyper realistic yet weird dream abt my mum winding up in hospital is the way to go this morning. Complete with:

-her bf refusing to speak to me abt it, and telling me not to bother going to visit her in the weird, somehow existing in both CT and ND simultaneously, hospital with a 'haven't you already been enough of a burden to her?'

-me staying in my grandparent's old house in ND, and for some reason that meant being wildly unable to get ready to go to the hospital. Finding my clothes was nearly impossible, but. all their old decorations were back up on the wall so even as I was searching for them I like. Didn't want to leave? As if the house would revert back to being sold like it has been irl, if i left it. Finally I wound up just stealing clothes from my grandfather's side of their closet (specifically his old 80s styled 'eagle on a tree branch' print sweater that he got forced to toss a few years ago bc it was becoming more holes than sweater, and one of his old, big leather jackets. somehow i found jeans that fit me, idk how considering i can't seem to do that irl rn but i digress)

-me showing up to the hospital FINALLY only for Noel Fielding?? to be sitting outside it with a friend dressed in what i can only describe as absolutely gorgeous future techno witch clothing. Unfortunately they were fucking dicks in this dream and scared the shit out of me by joking that 'it was so nice I'd shown up still despite the worst' and implying my mum had already passed. Noel did shout apologies as i stomped off inside and that as far as he knew she was still okay, but his friend is the one who handed me a wrapped in plastic, small, metal stool with a weird cartoon face on the seat so i could 'sit with her body, like sitting shiva, right?' (not like that at all to my knowledge, but then again my family has rarely to never fully followed any of the various religious rituals around death, we just. take the bits the dead person liked from them and ignore the rest, for better or for worse. Maybe that's just what happens when a family is a mishmash of various christian sorts from Catholic to Protestant with the hidden knowledge that actually, prior to ppl moving to the States, ppl in the family were Jewish but inter-marrying into Catholic families for safety-sake, and so any Jewish traditions used now are done wrongly and weirdly and in odd bits and pieces. At least that's as much as I've been told/have found out abt it, anyway)

-I proceed into this stupidly fancy and open concept hospital, to immediately find a hugr crowd mucking up the elevators (crowding the elevator bank and refusing to let others on.) That's where Con showed up, and helped me make it up the ridiculously wide, roundish staircases (think like. wide rounded stage steps, but for each level of this hospital), while also trying soothe me by telling me Housemate was already here and waiting for me, so were my grandparents and even Mum's bf (he promised to keep him away from me lol, it was v sweet in an otherwise filled with anxiety dream.)

-however, as we were struggling up the steps (also full of crowds, pushing each other around, so we literally had to hold hands and hold onto the railings and walls to avoid being shoved down the stairs), he kept hesitating on saying more abt mum. He tried to distract me by mentioning that, since I was here, the docs might want me to address some of my own health issues but that he wouldn't let them force me into any treatment i didn't want. Then he finally alluded to mum being in worse straits than I'd been told abt and said something to the effect of 'doing only what you can, not what she or others would expect of you' and 'not to set yourself on fire to keep someone else alive' plus admitting he was deeply worried my family was abt to force me into a big decision that absolutely wasn't the ONLY treatment option that would help mum, but it was implied to be the one mum's bf and my grandparents were pushing for.

-still dunno exactly what that option was, but just before i woke up i started hearing the latter part of the song Gethsemane from JCS (Housemate and I have been watching various versions irl this weekend lol), specifically the bit where Jesus dares/begs/etc God to see how he dies. This was accompanied by me finally reaching my mum's hospital room, and a stupid bright light emanating from it and like. Not to critique my own brain and the dream it created, but that was far too on the nose for me personally lmao.

-and I woke up thinking abt the call with my grandparents that I had on Thursday (didn't go super poorly but went. kind of weird and uncomfortable and confirmed again that like. they're happy for me being out here in CT, yet at the same time hold it and my happiness against me to some unconscious degree as originally outright confirmed by Mum in an earlier call her and I had like. Tail end of last year lmao. the main crux seeming to be 'why couldn't i find happiness in ND/what's wrong with all of them/why wasn't i willing to keep trying to make my life work in ND regardless of my happiness/don't i know how hard it is without my being there to help everyone whenever they ask/etc family bullshit')

And now I'm laying here thinking. If the Worst would happen for any of them, they would fully expect me to empty my bank accounts and do whatever else i had to, to get to ND not just to see them, but to help. to take care of as much as possible for them (mum and grandma get decision paralysed by sad/scary life events, my aunt is so uncomfortable with sickness and death she won't do hospital visits or funerals at all anymore for anyone, my cousins...are young enough they won't know how to handle it/won't want to, my grandpa tends to just shut down and isolate when things go to shit, and that's not to say that they all don't still get done things that need doing in these situations, but that they DO all usually need prodding and help and have leaned on me for that since i was a kid.)

And i would of course want to see them/help however i could, but. not to that extent. not to the point that I'd have nothing for myself, no money or help (bc they're not in a position to return that help or money to me, and they'd be so emotional as to likely be extremely offended and upset if i mentioned needing help myself.)

That said, I'm sick of silently daring them to watch me die just for their sakes, even tho i do still love them all dearly. and of course, that's entirely too dramatic but at the same time, Mum and I have had convos abt 'what if there's a shooting somewhere that we're at, how do we handle it, how are we attempting to protect each other' and Mum always says she would take a bullet for me, but she didn't protest when i say that I'd take one for her or anyone else in the family first. Last time she just nodded like. yeah. of course you would. so. Feelings, abt all of this.

If u actually read this full thing that was A. very sweet of u and i appreciate that u care abt my silly lil fucked up brain enough to do that (genuinely, I'm v grateful) and b. here is a pic of Nisha as what little compensation i can give for u reading this long ass ramble lol

[sucktacular]

Cw health scare, passing out, food mention, weed + being high, mention of blood work/needles

Had a yucky time last night that was very scary and wanna vent about it

and honestly kinda hope maybe someone that has low blood sugar moments or panic attacks or whatever the fuck could give me some insight if you're comfy doing so!!

Other wise just ignore this post :3 I'm okay now! But obv will get it looked at, prommy.

Also cw disordered eating... I don't mean to do it for any particular reasons I'm just very bad at remembering to eat, eating enough, and having too low energy to make anything lately. I got fresh groceries yesterday night tho so I'll be back to eating right for a bit.

So I uh nearly passed out at 3am alone in my kitchen trying to make a sandwich and I'm kinda pissed that my body is shitting out on me and now I gotta go to the human mechanic and get my stuff looked over cuz uh... Not normal happenings

I got up after laying down in bed for a while trying to sleep but got hungry and I was a little zooted too to be fair. Collected myself. Got all dressed to leave my room and was totally fine. If it was from standing up too fast it should have definitely hit me by that point but I was fine.

Went down and took all the things out of the fridge I needed for a sandwich. Slow and meticulous , not too fast cuz I was stoned and like to take my time to be quiet. Opened the bread, got a plate, opened the mayo, mayo'd my bread, then I went to open the deli chicken and started greying out and getting really light headed and weak and shakey and cold. So I waited a moment and it kept getting worse so I sat down and propped myself in the corner of my cabinets to try and help. Drank my chocolate milk and tried to wait it out. I've had low blood sugar act like that before- cold, shakey, grey vision, weak, etc - cuz I've kind of always been really bad at making sure I eat meals and last night i had just been eating chips, crackers, and chocolate pretzels all night. Snjcjsbjdks. I've been snackless for a few days so I NEEDED snack overload.

Anyway it kept getting worse over the minute or two to the point my vision was like white and black tv static with tunnel vision. my head felt super pressurized and I couldn't hear? I've had tinnitus since I was a tiny child but it really felt like those movies when everything is muffled and all you can hear is a very tiny faint high pitch ring. I could barely hear my tinnitus which was ... Deafeningly silent and that's WEIRD. I've never heard... Nothing? So that was scary. My whole body felt sweaty and hot and I just didn't know really what to do.

I think it was low blood sugar but + weed made me have a panic attack? Maybe? Or really bad low blood sugar. Because I HAVE been having light headed episodes and feeling weak lately... Which I chocked up to vitamin deficiencies (B12, D, or iron are problems of the past so I started taking those every day for the past week or so.)

Kind of super mad doctor I saw last week insisted I don't need blood work and to just take my new meds, cuz there's definitely something going on here and while blood work probably wouldn't have stopped last night's episode from happening, at the very least I could be a step closer today than i am. :(

Uhm... Yeah anyway it was really scary and I was on the floor in the kitchen with just Frankie watching me for a hot maybe 2-5minutes... Hard to tell how long. Not a super long time but more than just like 1-2 minutes. Felt better. Tried to get up and finish sandwich making. Got grey and weak again. Sat down some more. EVENTUALLY my vision and hearing went back to normal. Finished my sandwich weakly and packed the stuff away sloppily and had to turn the hallway light on cuz I couldn't see in the dark at all. Went to my bed and ate my sandwich and still felt fucked but eventually went right back to normal.

I do still feel airy headed and not totally alert but that's been kinda how it's been this past few weeks.

So uh... Mmm. Don't like that at all. Phone on me all the time now. Doctor visit again soon for this issue specifically. Partner suggested it sounded like a panic attack or when they get a vasovagal response to needles and nearly pass out. I definitely got scared and panicked cuz it was awful and scary and felt like I was dying. I did some 5seconds in 5 seconds out breathing exercises and it helped quite a bit to calm and focus me in the moment. Which was neat! They ain't lying about those exercises even if you don't know what you're doing. Focus on the counting and the breathing in and out softly.

Uhm.... So yeah if anyone actually genuinely has a comment or experience with that I'd love to hear. Otherwise I'm okay so far today and keeping an eye on it...

Problem also is I don't... Well, I have agoraphobia basically and it's very hard for me to go to a doctor without help from a friend or my partner and I can't figure out any online telehealth things in Ontario that don't cost money or aren't just for prescription renewals so uh not sure what to really do. I know I need to get it looked into but my GOD you know how fear will make you not care for yourself? Gestures. I'm trying so hard not to jump to the conclusion that it might be pre diabetes because my family has no history thankfully but the signs arent looking good..

[dollking081]

Tired and scared

bit of a vent, but I just want to put this out there because I don't have many other places where I won't be seen as a freak and I needed to post anyway

I've been wondering if maybe I'm not dollkin, or otherkin at all, and maybe I'm just faking and doing this all for my own ego and the feeling of being special, or maybe it's just my brain misinterpreting gender dysphoria and my general hatred of humanity as something that it's not

I know it' not - or rather, I hope it's not - but I can't get over how guilty and doubtful I feel whenever I say "oh, yeah, I'm a dollkin" and it's tearing me apart because I can't just speak about it to my friend group because they won't understand because they've not been through anything similar - and those who have have a habit of just going "ohhhhh I had it SO bad it was WAY worse than that"

It's not much of a help that, even while writing this, I can't help but think that it's none of y'alls business and it's not your problem and I shouldn't be putting this out there for all of y'all to read because you probably don't want to but if I don't say it then it'll only get worse - or maybe it'll get worse anyway and none of this matters and I'm typing all of this out for no reason ...

Thanks for reading. If anyone has any ideas how I can get out of this rough patch, that's be greatly appreciated

Stay safe, superstars

[oppositegenderscantbefriends]

This debate is lame.

*

Still surprised a ex of mine got i.g maybe exposed on reddit? Not sure if she okay-ed it or what I don't speak to them so not my problem but still weird an a Lil gross to see.

*

I want to fuk around or get into a relationship but at the same time I know I'm not mentally ready nor emotionally available right now for that. I also just don't want to spend money. I really have been selfish with myself and it's nice. But uh yeah I kinda wanna fuk around but that could cost my time away from making money and that doesn't seem worth it or productive. I did a lot to be who I am today an locked away the man wh0re b.s I used to do and idk if I'd wanna let that back out again because I started thinking what if I had a daughter or what about my sister's? If they saw or could see how I am with women would they see that as okay if I wasn't being genuine or honest or loyal? Would they accept a lesser man instead of somebody good in nature? So I stopped an changed my ways. Just didn't want them to grow up valuing something horrible and If I had a daughter I wouldn't want her to let men use her or think that what they do is okay or normal or right because they got something from it. That's just not healthy or okay in anyway.

*

Mental health isn't good again. Just not okay but at the same time I will be. Only because I said and promised I wouldn't do anything permanent. Although the urge is strong. I just know now that it'll pass and that it's just temporary pain. It's not gonna be like this forever. Even though I challenge that idea, I have come to accept it and started hoping it does. Really wish I didn't see and go through and have things done to me in life, seen things i didnt ever think i would, heard things from people i never expected to hear, and experienced stuff I shouldn't have ever felt. I know life isn't easy for many and everyone has a story. I get that, not asking or looking for empathy or sympathy because in my eyes. I still believe it's my fault even though I'm told differently. I still don't see it that way.

*

I wish I had somebody that would show me love thru making me amazing food recipes from insta, Facebook or wherever to just try out. Such a food wh0re. That and having somebody make you something from scratch or just overall homemade always means a lot to me because it doesn't need to be expensive or fancy or any of that. It's the effort and thought of that person taking that much time and thinking that hard about me that makes me happy. The littlest things in life truly mean the most because in my experience, they're always overlooked.

*

I had a bad health scare recently. Blood pressure wasn't lookin right, heart rate was a bit high but all good. Just almost maybe nearly went on a ambulance ride. Couldn't catch my breath, talking was nearly impossible. Heart felt funny a couple days but we good. It's normal feeling now. If it happens again I'll probably be in the e.r or possibly dead if it's as serious as it could be but I don't think it will be. I got really good genetics sooooo yeah. Just sucked feeling my chest that tight, not able to speak an when I did it felt like my chest on the left side was gonna pop or burst an the next day it hurting right in the same area like Lil sharp pains an also slightly unable to catch my breath along with my heart thumpin crazy fast while I barely moved(i.e. walked or picked something up or w.e)

*

Fingers crossed that some broad gives me the green light to truly give a real hard-core experience. I just would like to vent a lot of stress and hate out into some intimacy.

*

Lost weight 188 to 152-155 now. I'm gonna get back to bulking and hitting the gym again since I have a nice solid foundation to work with since I didn't lose too much muscle mass. Gonna have a insane physique and strength when I go back to 160-165. Probably take a couple months since I'm gonna be slowly bulking since I want a bit more muscle than fat this time. Although I might eventually get back to 170ish to just be a solid unit. But yea, the main goal is weight gain with strength training.

*

Might be it? Idk. I can't decide anything anymore. Just feel desolate. Goodnight, gonna hit my cart an fuk off for a while. Maybe re share post on here still but my post will slow or stop. Same across the board of other socials.

P.s. stand up an get help if needed. Be safe in what you do in your day to day. Take care of the only body you have. Don't be weak with people who don't care about or use you. Cut em off and lock in on yourself. Nobody will give you a life worth living, you have to make one yourself.

[polly-isok]

super overwhelmed and stressed rn so im probably going to do something stupid. im probably just going to ramble on and on so yeah, tap/click on the cut thing to see my vent

tw: mentions of attempted sewerslide

i keep seeing videos on youtube complaining about inconsistencies in others stories and other critics of others characters and im afraid of that happening with my stories and characters. it is like trying to balance on a board in a rapid river without knowing how to swim. I cant decide on if i want Craigory (the "chinchilla" thingy) to be a representation of me or just his own character. I think I might just say the world Craigory is in is an au (alternative universe) from the one where I use him to represent me. Sounds stupid when I actually read it alouuuudd pgst (probably gonna scrap it). Fuck my head hurtts. Probably cause im trying to listen to music as I type this. idk about actually giving my characters lore, I might just scrap the whole idea of demon psych ward. I haven't even been sent to one despite my parents knowing i attempted suicide. (It was a shit attempt, I tried eating a fuckton of melatonin but only ate 7 cause I was scared. This was October 24th, 2023 for a bit more context) and while I do really struggle mentally I don't think I could properly show a mental hospital (or even just a normal hospital) when I have yet to go to either. Alright I think I might be overestimated but I'm probably just faking that shit or something. Also my shorts are way to short like this is really uncomfortable, it's the femboy shorts tho so lmao. I need to buy more guy stuff and actually be a guy instead of some unempathetic bastard like my dad.

anyways sorry for that hard to read ramble. my head hurts, everything's itchy, and all sounds are way to annoying to help. good morning or good night.

[chubbyheadquarters]

Getting with Macaque

Genre: Romantic, slight Angst

Pronouns: Gender-Neutral

TW/CW: None

Character(s): 6-Eared Macaque-Liu Er Mihou

It'd be interesting, to say the least.

As we all know, Macaque's not one to trust easily. He's gotta ease his way into trusting you, so you'll have to be patient. He'll be a little coy and purposely confusing, but if you stick around, then his opinion on you will change a little bit.

When you met him and act all nice, he'll see it as a trick. He's been betrayed before and people have gone a great distance to fool him. He's not about to let that happen again. But he'll lower his guard just a little when he realizes that, yeah, you're just a nice person.

If you know Wukong, he's gonna use that to his advantage and use you as secret intel. If you don't, he can still use you to get to know Mk, which he proposes as meeting a new friend.

You, totally unaware of his secret plans, continue supporting him and cheering him on, giving him advice and are always willing to be there if he ever wants to vent or rant. He slowly starts to feel a bit bad. Here you are, being used by him, and you don't even notice.

He appreciates how patient you are with him, especially when it comes to him not talking about his past or motives. It's a sensitive topic, and though he won't say now, he knows he'll be able to tell you one day. Talking about his revenge on Wukong gets you curious, but you let him do his thing.

If you're into art and/or theatre, he's honestly really happy about it, though he tries not to show it. He's got a bad boy reputation to keep. Although, if you offer to help in any way, bad boy energy is gone and you two are planning and making stuff for his next play.

He's gonna train you. Part of the package deal. He says it's for safety reasons, and y'know what, he's partially telling the truth. He might need your help in battle afterall. Even if you're not strong, you can still act as a distraction. But part of him truly doesn't want you to get hurt, so he's gonna teach you how to kick some ass. He'll be a tease, but he'll always praise you when you do well.

Don't push yourself. He'd rather you take your time with training and get it as perfect as you can. After training with him, you would unconsciously look to him when you did well, waiting for his praise. It makes him feel warm inside, knowing how much you treasure his words.

When you talk to him about weight, maybe even wanting to lose it, he'll help you out if that's what you really want-But he's-So confused? Why? You're so soft and plush and everytime he holds you it's like he's in heaven. I'd like to think that he's open to every body type, but he tends to prefer a fuller/chubby partner.

If anyone messes with you, especially if it's because of your weight, they'll get what's coming to them. He'll embarrass them, scare them for a bit, make sure they learn their lesson. He'll comfort you, telling you that you're fine just the way you are. "Those idiots don't seem to know perfection...""Huh?"" Those guys are just a bunch of idiots." Cue blushing monkey.

At one point, he starts questioning if he really wants to keep doing this. He realizes he doesn't want to hurt you, but he had been planning his revenge for so long. He can't lose this chance. It was...REALLY conflicting for him. But he went through with it and it crushed you when everything came to light.

When you do find out, your conflicted and hurt expression makes him realize HOW MUCH he fucked up. He kept telling himself that his revenge was what mattered the most. He didn't need you. You'd leave him anyways. Everyone always does. But your words hurt him so much more than he thought they would.

"Everything we went through...was all a lie? I didn't mean anything to you? Was I just going to be another puppet? Y'know, I'm so used to being used by others, but... I never expected it from YOU..."

When you leave and don't come back, he's devastated. He tries to get over it with his bad old coping habits, but he just can't. Nothing's the same without you. He wants you back, but he knows it's not that simple, and it's not gonna be easy. He broke your trust, and you told him that was the most important thing in y'all's friendship.

He quickly notices how you linger at the entrance of the building when passing by during a walk or if you're heading somewhere else, as if you're pondering on going in, but you never do, always leaving with a look of sadness and betrayal. It takes a little while, but he finds a way to get you to come back, and he makes a play of the events that happened that day. It felt like a cruel joke, like he wanted you to relive that that day. It made you want to leave, but the ending was different.

"The warrior, heartbroken by the loss of his one true friend, decided to change for the better. And after time had passed, he went to them, and apologized with the hope of gaining their trust again."

You stayed behind when the show ended, conflicted about the play. You knew it was his message to you. An apology in the Macaque way. But this wasn't something he could simply apologize for- "Got room for one more?"

The two of you talk it out, him letting you vent about your feelings and how trust was a hard thing to earn back when it was broken. He apologized and admited that he had truly begun to see you as a friend. Someone he started to, in a sense, cherish.

Seeing him so vulnerable and open made you think about everything, and with a conflicted heart, you decided to give him one last chance, and that if he we're to blow it, he'd never see you again. And goodness he's so willing to make it up to you.

Slowly but surely, he starts gaining your trust back. He became a bit more open, emotional wise, but past wise still guarded. He took your feelings way more into consideration. In due time, you began to laugh with him, joke with him, even smile at him. Yeah, he's not going to lose your trust again. He doesn't ever want to let go of this warm feeling.

He'll see the confliction on your face when you happen to hear him talking about Wukong. You never butt in or try to stop him, knowing it's not your fight, but it still reminds you of that day.... He tries his best not to bring it up around you.

Before you're together, he'll flirt and say it's a joke, but he's testing the waters to see how you'll react. If it's positive, he'll continue. If it makes you uncomfortable, then he'll stop.

His tail will unconsciously move towards you, wrapping around you. When you mention it, he denies it with all sorts of excuses. You find it cute, but you usually keep it to yourself. Last time you called him cute, he went on a small rant on why he wasn't cute. Okay whatever Macaque ┐(￣ー￣)┌

When he's tired or just wants to be closer to you, he'll lean on you, just wanting to feel your warmth and comfort to get him through the rest of the day. Head on your shoulder, eyes closed and muscles relaxed.

This bitch fucking cuddles you to oblivion. He's not letting go. Once he's got you in his grasp, you better hope you won't have to be anywhere important anytime soon. And that you have snacks. You're his personal pillow now. I don't make the rules.

👏🏽Pet👏🏽the👏🏽monkey👏🏽Please do so. Brush his hair and hum a little song. That'll put him at peace. But better yet, simply run your hands through his hair, massage his head, and he's in heaven. He'll never get tired of your touch. It's so soft and he knows he's safe with you.

At one point, he will turn his glamour off around you. He's fucking scared of what you'll think, scared that you'll run off and hate him all over again-But when he feels your hands softly cup his cheeks and you give him a soft smile-He knows that you're the one. You two will cuddle that day, not leaving the room and enjoying each other's presence.

When you do get together, not much changes other than the fact that he's a bit more open with his affections. You guys we're already cuddling it up before. Still not super into PDA, but he'll show off every once in a while. Arm and tail around you more often and nicknames thrown out there. If anyone even dares to flirt with you, they'll get a harsh glare as a warning.

His nicknames for you are so sweet. "Moonlight", "Sweetheart ", "Sugar", " Beautiful/Handsome." Take your pick. Your nicknames for him consist of "Plum", "Honey", "Dear"-Maquack. God he was so surprised that you actually called him that. But that's usually reserved for when he's spacing out or angry. Snaps him back into reality.

Sorry if there's any spelling errors or if I missed something, I just wanted or make sure there was good enough context/flow to reading it and not randomly thrown out there. I hope the writings alright and that y'all enjoy. Wukong's up next!

[yanderes-galore]

Hello if it's not too much could you do yandere Ballora from FNAF sister location?

I hope you have a wonderful day

Yeah! At this point I'm gonna end up writing all of Sister Location 😄 Which is fine, as it is one of my fav FNAF games. Animatronic or android, does not matter (Not much changes anyways? Lol). It took me a bit because her wiki doesn't show much personality-

Let me know if I have to tweak my view on Ballora-

Yandere! Ballora Concept

Pairing: Platonic/Romantic

Possible Trigger Warnings: Gender-Neutral Darling, Obsession, Stalking(ish), One sided affection, Implied attempted murder, Implied kidnapping.

- Ballora is much different than the other bots in Sister Location.

- She's not as sadistic as Funtime Freddy.

- She's not loud and boisterous like Funtime Foxy.

- She also isn't childish like Circus Baby.

- Ballora prefers to dance and sing in her gallery and is much more mature than the others.

- Although she's also sadistic and fearless of what others think of her.

- Ballora doesn't fall for you easily, either.

- She hears your voice often in her gallery but doesn't pay much mind.

- Some days you're speaking with a coworker, some other days you're speaking with guests in her room.

- She isn't blind, no, she just keeps her eyes closed during her performances.

- The more often you're in her room (most likely because you oversee that area), she starts to find comfort in your voice.

- You're a familiar voice in a sea of strangers.

- She even catches you speaking about her sometimes.

- When you're not looking she probably snuck a peek at what you look like by opening her eyes.

- She utilizes her hearing mostly, however.

- Ballora knows how your footsteps sound and your voice.

- By that it's easy for her to identify you.

- Once she's attached she most likely uses the Minireenas to follow you.

- It scares you when you think you hear something behind you and turn to look.

- Only to see one of the small dancers scampering off like some creature.

- Using them is useful if Ballora wants to keep tabs on you.

- Soon the dancer even invites you closer to her stage.

- "Why don't you come closer? There's no need to dance alone."

- The sudden favoritism the bot exhibits throws you off guard but you assume it's because she's grown used to you.

- You do work in her room the most.

- While during the day the most she can do is beckon you over or send Minireenas to watch you, at night she's delighted you return to her room.

- You're sent at night for maintenance with another guard.

- Something supposedly happened to the previous one, an accident you guessed.

- So you decided to fill in.

- Ballora's gallery needed to be checked over and Funtime Auditorium also needed to be looked at.

- Sighing, you crawl through the vent before arriving Ballora's Gallery while your coworker goes to the auditorium.

- Things look shut down.

- "Is that you? You're never here this late, dear."

- You stop moving, hearing Ballora's music come closer.

- "I know you're there. Did you come for a late night dance?"

- There's a laugh coming from the dancer.

- "I tease... I know why you're here. Although, don't we have time to get more acquainted with each other beforehand?"

- You sense smaller figures shuffling about the room.

- It's so dark but you can sense the dancer in front of you.

- The usually closed eyelids then shoot open, small glowing eyes staring at you.

- "There's a reason that accident happened."

- Small bodies grab your legs, you try to shake them off but to no avail.

- You try to scream, but another one latches onto your face to muffle you.

- "But you needen't worry about them. They aren't important."

- The dancer comes closer, tilting your restrained head back.

- "Shall we dance, dear?"

[caffeine-and-melatonin]

✨Bad Batch E14 Spoilers✨

Sooooo I'm about to say a whole lot of not very polite words......

AHHHHHHHHHH HOLY SHIT Y'ALL AHHHHHHHHHH

Let's have a look at my brain melting during this episode (there's a lot oops):

- Commando armor? Slicked back hair? HOLY FUCK GREGOR OMG THE BOY!!!!! WE ACTUALLY GET TO SEE THE BOY!!!!!! (wait hold up does this mean we might see Wolffe too? Not asking for a friend I'm asking for me)

- Eek this is giving me very much "Ahsoka being hunted by Trandoshans" vibes

- Hunter doing knife tricks....that's...well....AHHHHH

- Omg Omega trying to copy the little knife spins is so cute

- REX!!! HIM!!! MY FIRST LOVE!!! HE'S BACK AGAIN!!! YAY!!! Sweetheart that poncho is fantastic!

- Is he ok? IS REX OK??? WHY IS HE RUNNING???

- Here's the thing I love Gregor but like they were a bit too quick to go after him and they still haven't talked about Cross soooooo hmmm

- Ok I have a feeling we are gonna get some Echo character development in this episode. The way Echo looked at Hunter was what got him to cave in and agree to go rescue Gregor. He knows it's the right thing to do and it's so interesting to me that Echo seems to have the strongest sense of moral obligation (aside from Omega). I have a feeling like this might clash with Hunter being the leader and honestly I wanna see how they handle that as a team.

- Nothing would bring me more joy than to absolutely DECK Rampart on behalf of Cross, Howzer, and Eleni Syndulla

- speaking of cross....CROSS!!! YOU'RE HERE!!!

- Wait hold up are they leaving Kamino?

- Also what happens to all the cadets? Like they're little kids...I'm scared

- Ok imma have to go on a whole rant/info dump about Kaminoan history and society later so y'all have that to look forward to in the morning

- Awwww Echo talking about Rex makes me want to cry. He looks up to his older brother so much and it's honestly so sweet

- Hunter using his special abilities? Hunter using his special abilities!

- Omg its just gonna be Hunter, Tech, and Echo?! TECH AND ECHO CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT???

- Look at those boys go! Climbing up a whole ass mountain while I look at a flight of stairs and go "ewww why"

-Ok is it just me or does the whole bottomless pit style base with a lot of red accents gives off Empire but make it First Order Aesthetic...? Just me?

- Tech's eyes are just so ✨p r e t t y✨. That's all.

- STORMTROOPERS? ALREADY?

- OMG ECHO BRINGING UP SKAKO MINOR! AND THEN TALKING ABOUT HOW IF SOMEONE IS BEING HELD AGAINST THEIR WILL THEY HAVE TO GET THEM OUT! DID YOU SEE HUNTER'S REACTION???? EVEN WITHOUT SEEING HIS FACE YOU KNOW HE'S GOTTA BE THINKING ABOUT CROSS!!! LOOK AT HIS BODY LANGUAGE!!! AHHHHHHH

- "i'm thinkin'." whispers Wrecker mindfully.

- I don't know what it is, but i just love this shot:

- Concept: into the spiderverse but it's just clones jumping off elevators and somehow gracefully free climbing on the walls

- Commando armor is just soooooo cool!!!! Like seriously! Also the TK trooper armor is....interesting

- AHHHHHH GREGOR'S LITTLE VOICE CRACKS!!! HE'S ADORABLE!!!

- "That's CAPTAIN traitor."

- Gregor really do be out here holding up the standard that you have to be a special kind of pretty to be a Captain in the GAR

- Also can we talk about how absolutely jacked Gregor's arms are? Like sir no wonder you aren't wearing any armor on your arms! How would fit! Damn dude

- I miss 99 so much

- Boys using stun rounds. No (intentional) unalives. Good for them.

- Echo and Tech working together and having each other's backs makes me beyond happy

- SASSY TECH AND SASSY GREGOR

- Tech really does yell in all lower case doesn't he?

- NO GREGOR! DAMMIT DAVE STOP SHOOTING THE BOY!

-When I tell you I thought Tech was gonna get shot too.... my god I don't think I would be able to handle that in any capacity

- SPOILER WARNING FOR REBELS: Gregor talking about surviving getting shot hurts me. This hurts my feelings. It hurts my feelings a lot.

- Ok but Tech casually blowing up that air vent grate thing was hot. No I will not elaborate.

- also...ECHO FUCKING YEETED ALL THREE OF THEM AND THEN HIMSELF LIKE AT LEAST 10 FT IN THE AIR!

- Echo carrying Gregor through the air ducts reminds me so much of Rex carrying him on Sako Minor

- WAIT HOLY SHIT OMEGA IS FLYING THE SHIP BY HERSELF!!! LOOK AT HER GO!!! Tech has to be so proud of her. I just know he is.

- Gonky helping + increased theme music = ahhhhhhh yay!

- TECH BACK AT IT AGAIN WITH THE FUCKING SEXY FLIGHT MANEUVERS!!!!!!! My stars I love that man. I'm speechless. It's like almost 4am and I legitimately screeched

- Tech: *flying like a badass* Gregor: bitch what are you doing this is not the time nor place for this shit

- FUCK NOOOOOOO HUNTER!!!!!!! NOOOOOOO!!!!!!

- GONKY!!! AHHHHH

- How tf is Hunter still alive??? Like I'm not complaining but still

- HOLY FUCKING SHIT NOOOOO THIS IS NOT OK!!!!! OMEGA'S VOICE AND SHEER PANIC BREAKS MY HEART!!! TECH'S LOOK OF HOPELESSNESS!!!! AND HUNTER SOUNDING ABSOLUTELY DEFEATED!!!! FUCK I CAN'T HANDLE THIS RIGHT NOW!!!!

- Yo on top of all that Lama Su just got straight up unalived

-hunter in a jail cell......................CROSSHAIR

- Ok but until the very last second, that was the least scrunched up face I have ever seen Cross make. Like you too have lovely eyes it's a shame you're so grouchy all the time. ANYWAY thoughts on that face because my brain is very full rn

FINAL THOUGHTS

- I just love clones more than life itself. Look at the boys go. I love them. I wanna give them all hugs (in regards to Tech…I will not kiss and tell).

- Gregor has and always will be so precious. Love that quirky boy so much.

- WTF IS GOING ON WITH REX??????? I NEED ANSWERS!!!!!!!

- Echo played such a major role in this episode and honestly I'm so glad. I still think there is so much more room to grow his character, but at least it's something.

- Gonky being that bitch this episode 👑

- Not sure if you've noticed, but my soul is no longer attached to my physical form. Tech has it. Tech owns my soul. I am more than ok with this.

- The last 5 minutes really just did that didn't it? Like jeez bro that was a lot

- Cross? Breaks? Hunter? Out? And? They? Both? Escape? After? Having? An? Emotional? Reconciling? PLEASE???????????

Overall, while I did really like the Ryloth episodes, I honestly think this might be my new favorite episode.

The episode itself was well paced

The stakes felt rather high

Fantastic action

Echo played a main part in the storyline

Contributed to not only the plot of the show but added context for how Gregor and Rex meet up

Tech flying and looking hot while doing it...that's very important to the overall ranking

It was engaging and intense with one hell of a cliffhanger at the end

So yeah I really liked this episode! I'm super excited to see what happens next (omg there's only two episodes left oh no scary)!