#But this is the length of most of the posts...

[lotsofluvz]

࿔‧ ֶָ֢˚˖𐦍˖˚ֶָ֢ ‧࿔ slut him out .ᐟ.ᐟ

synopsis zayne came home exhausted and frustrated. all he can think of is you blowing him off to forget all this stress.

zayne x fem!reader ☆ SMUT ☆ whiny!zayne (MDNI!)

tags blowjob, overstim, cowgirl, teasing, creampie

note it's my first time to post smut and hoping to improve in the future. i wanted to write about my man zayne aka the father of my children so i hope u enjoy reading n luv ya! <3

Zayne has one thing on his mind. He wants your mouth on his cock as you suck the stress away.

He had a long day in the hospital, and it was even more hectic today. He usually can handle this workload, but he can't seem to forget the other night. You, on top of him as you ride him to his third orgasm that night. He needs you.

He hurriedly finished his work and came home rather earlier than usual. As you heard the door open, you greeted him.

"Hey baby, how's work? Is it hectic?" you asked as you placed a kiss on his cheeks.

"It was more hectic today, but it's okay," he replied rather sullenly. You noticed the difference in his voice and asked if he was okay.

"If I'm being completely honest with you, I'm not, but the entire time, I've been thinking about you," he said while looking at you.

"What were you thinking about, baby?" you hummed as you waited for his answer.

"I've been thinking about you giving me a blowjob, having those lips of yours on my cock," he replied.

"Oh, is that why you're acting like this? It's rather rude to say that without asking me about my day," you teased him while making small touches on his neck.

"How's your day, love?" he whined and seemed to be more occupied with your touches.

"Not like that, baby, but I will forgive you today," you hummed as you guided him towards the sofa.

"I'm sorry, love. I'm just so desperate for your mouth. Please suck me off," he pleaded as you situated yourself between his legs.

"I love when you are like this, so desperate for me. C'mon baby, keep telling me what you want," you encouraged him.

"I want you to… ughh," he whined as you started kissing his thighs. "I want you to suck me… please, pull my pants," he begged as you slowly pulled down his pants, revealing his hard cock.

You shower his cock with light kisses as you tease his length slowly. Making him lose his composure as the minutes go by. "Stop teasing me... please, baby," he whined as you continued stroking him.

Without wasting another minute, your mouth met his throbbing cock. As you slowly bob your head up and down while maintaining eye contact with him. His mouth spewed out the most beautiful moan, and you want to keep hearing those moans.

"Don't stop moaning, baby. I want to hear it all, don't you dare cover your mouth," you demanded as you started to fasten your pace. "Uhhhh, miss… don't stop. Please go deeper," he begged as his moans started getting louder.

Your mouth had reached the base of his cock while your hands played with his balls. You can sense that he was reaching his climax by the way his legs are shaking. This signaled you to even hasten your pace; it rewarded you with a slur of incoherent words and fucks from his pretty mouth.

"Fuck—don't stop, miss. I'm close. I'm gonna cum—" and before you knew it, a spurt of cum rushed down your throat. His moans echoed in your shared living room.

"I'm sorry, miss. I couldn't keep it anymore," he said as he tried to calm down. You pulled your mouth off his cock and asked him to lie on the sofa. "I'm still sensitive, miss. Just give me a minute," he pleaded.

His words didn't matter as you quickly sank down his cock. earning you a loud whine from his mouth as he tries to calm himself, or else he will cum on the spot.

"Fuck—don't move too fast or else—" Before he can finish his sentence, you ride him faster as you try to reach your own climax. As the sound of your skin hitting against each other filled the room. After a few minutes, you finally felt your climax reaching.

"Shit, I'm close, baby," you moaned as you thrust into him.

"Fuck, my legs are shaking, miss. I'm gonna cum too," he whined.

After a few more thrusts, both of you reached your climax. He pressed his lips into yours as you felt his cum slowly filling up your pussy.

You slowly pull out of him and lay on his chest as the two of you try to catch your breath.

"Thank you, love. I will make it up to you, I promise. I love you," as he placed a kiss on your forehead.

"I love you too, baby," as you pulled him closer towards your body.

[gav-san]

Who's your Daddy? (Beckman Is)

Main Masterlist Here

One Piece Masterlist

Who's Your Daddy Masterlist

Who's your Daddy: Benn Beckman Length: 500 Words You are not good with words.

Aboard the Red Force, somewhere between nowhere and trouble…

The sun spilled across the deck in lazy sheets of gold. The ocean stretched out in every direction, glittering like a drunk god had scattered diamonds across it. The crew lounged in their usual post-job glory, half-drunk and wholly obnoxious. Meat sizzled on a spit. Ale sloshed over the rims of wooden mugs. Shanks was already barefoot and grinning, daring someone to arm wrestle him using only their toes.

You had your boots up on a crate, pretending to read a logbook while quietly timing how long it would take before someone started a drinking contest, a shouting match, or a spontaneous musical number involving a barrel and a mop.

It began, as most disasters did on this ship, with Lucky Roux.

He sat cross-legged beside the fire pit, chewing on something suspiciously shiny and waving a turkey leg like a gavel.

“Alright. Serious question. No lying. No thinking. Just gut reaction.”

Yasopp groaned. “That’s never once ended well.”

Roux grinned, looking around at the crew. “Who’s your daddy?”

Someone shouted, “The sea!” Another offered, “Shanks!”

Laughter rippled across the deck.

And without hesitation, without thought, without any self-preservation whatsoever, you replied aloud.

“Beckman.”

The world stopped moving.

Silence dropped like an anchor. A fork clattered to the floor. A barrel stopped mid-roll. Even the gull circling overhead gave up and flew away.

You blinked. Your mouth was still slightly open. Your soul tried to climb out through your spine.

Across the deck, Benn Beckman looked up from cleaning his rifle. His expression didn’t change, but the raise of his brow was slow and deliberate. It was the kind of expression that caused earthquakes in bureaucracies. He was watching you now.

Shanks nearly fell over.

“Beckman?!” he coughed. “Seriously? What the hell!”

You scrambled for cover. “I didn’t mean it like that. I meant authority. Like… command structure. You know. Leadership.”

Yasopp lost it completely. “Oh no. Don’t even try to walk that back.”

“You said it like it was burned into your DNA,” Roux cackled.

Shanks pointed accusingly. “I’m literally your captain. What does he even have that I don’t?”

“Dignity,” someone muttered from the rigging.

You covered your face. “I hate this ship. I hate all of you.”

Beckman stood. It wasn’t dramatic. He moved the way he always did, with the weight of quiet inevitability. The crew parted as he walked, still snickering. You were considering diving overboard.

He stopped in front of you.

“You know,” he said, voice low and maddeningly calm, “if I actually were your daddy, you wouldn’t be allowed to talk to me the way you do.”

Your soul left your body.

Somewhere behind you, Shanks screamed.

Beckman’s smirk widened just slightly as he turned and walked away, the sea breeze tugging at the edge of his coat like it was proud to know him.

The crew erupted. The teasing was immediate and merciless. Yasopp dubbed you “Little Miss Beckman” on the spot. Shanks protested so loudly that the figurehead vibrated.

You didn’t live it down for the rest of the month.

[loganwritesprobably]

Bed, without sleeping

Synopsis: Law is laying in bed, alone as usual, but he can’t help imagining what it’d be like to have you sleep beside him. Some good old yearning, but it’s a little horny too Tags/Warnings: Law/GN!Reader, black!Reader, nsfw, pre-relationship, Law masturbates while thinking about reader, but he’s mostly thinking about fluffy things Word count: 765 Notes: I’ve never written for an explicitly black reader before, though I make a conscious effort to make my other fics inclusive of black readers having seen posts about certain things. Which is to say - if there’s any advice/tips/constructive criticism you’d like to offer so I could do better in future, I’d super appreciate it! I’m whiter than milk so this is very much not my area of expertise

Law had met you six months ago, on an island he barely remembered and certainly couldn’t name. None of that information was important compared to you. He’d been fascinated by you from the moment he first lay eyes on you, though he managed to treat you the same as anyone else. He was good at pushing people away, keeping them at arm’s length for the sake of self preservation. Unfortunately, it was getting harder and harder to do that when it came to you. 

It was already late, he should already be asleep, and yet there he was staring at the ceiling. It wasn’t that he hadn’t tried, but every time he closed his eyes, images of you flooded his mind. Visions of your melanated skin glistening as you mop the deck, the physical exertion forcing you to unzip your boiler suit and tie it around your waist to avoid overheating; visions of you groaning at the mirror in the shared bathroom as you braided your own hair, harms sore and beginning to feel heavy, but refusing to give up on your task before it was finished; visions of your hands wrapped around a glass of whatever cool drink you’d chosen, making him imagine how good your hands would look wrapped around something else.

It was inappropriate and he knew it, but he just couldn’t help it. He thought you were gorgeous, he always had, and laying alone in his bed at night only seemed to amplify his newfound habit of letting his mind wander. Law turned to lay on his side and pulled one of his pillows to his chest, long ways, as if he was holding someone close. This was a new low, even for him. He buried his face in the pillow, breathing in deeply as he imagined your distinctive scent - one of these days he should really ask what perfume or cologne you wear because it was addictive - as if you’d previously slept beside him and now his pillow was retaining the smell of you. 

Images of your body flooded into his mind, how you’d look wrapped up in his arms, beside him, beneath him. Absently, he began rutting his hips against the pillow, holding it just that little bit tighter to give himself more friction. Even as his body moved, as if with a mind of its own, more innocent images flitted through his mind. You laughing with Ikkaku, arm wrestling Shachi, on Jean Bart’s back to adjust the flag when you weren’t beneath the water’s surface, arms wrapped around Clione as he leaned over the edge of the ship to look at something he was sure he’d seen amongst the waves, standing in the kitchen with Bepo, cooking something for everyone to share. You’d introduced Shachi’s white ass to spicy food, and told Penguin about dry brushing, you’d insisted on adding coconut oil to the regular grocery list, and you’d even slapped Law once. He remembered that moment fondly. 

Though he certainly craved you and your body, it was your mind and heart that he cared for most. He wanted to protect your heart with his blade, and sharpen your mind with shared wit. He maybe also wanted to pin you beneath him and slam into you from behind, but that was neither here nor there. Above all, he wanted the chance to call you his.  To have you lay beside him each night, in your underwear, bonnet on to protect your hair, in the state you insisted was your ugliest so he could press kisses over every inch of your dark skin and whisper to you just how wrong you were. He thought you were stunning no matter how you looked - he’d think you were perfect in a trash bag, covered in shit. 

As Law came over his pillow, shame mixed with post-orgasmic bliss churning in his stomach, the image of your eyes rolled back as you came along with him overtook his senses, and he could only wish that it was real. Law tossed aside his soiled pillow, making a mental note to wash it in the morning.

Finally, after that, he was able to fall asleep. But, you followed him into slumber, and his dreams were filled with domestic bliss with you at his side and he knew deep in his bones that he didn’t care what came next in his life because he’d be strong enough to face it if only he could keep you close, to be sure you were safe and well, and he could make sure that nobody would hurt you again.

Tag list: @claryeverlarkf @uselessboots @cainnoable @hyperfixationthingss @fanaticsnail @mermaniaa

If you'd like to tip me you can head over to my Kofi

[thesilly-goose]

:0

YIPPEE!!! THIS IS MOST JOYOUS!!! HUZZAH!!!

ahem ok let’s see i love all of u so bigggg sorry if i forget but i’m gonna give it a shot (under a cut for length)

@andromedicasphyxiate <-ur a queen and my tumblr bestie and ily ily ily ily ily ur so so so so so awesome never stop you-ing i love u so much i just akdjaljdlsks ur so aesthetic and [sobs]

@real-hawkguy <-haven’t really spoken to u much but u were one of my very first moots and ur all over my dash and i love everything u post so hi :DDDDD

@nonbinaryandroid <-STAR TREK FRENNNNN ilysm ur so cool and we do like parallel play with the star trek stuff lmao ur awesome ily <3

@101-android-luvr-010 <-ANOTHER STAR TREK MOOT!!!! ilysm ur so so so cool and awesome and i love seeing u on my dash and in my notifs ilysm

@ilovebeesandallthat <-i love the stuff u reblog and u were also one of my earlier moots and i will love u forever and ever and ever <33333

@bluejay-in-flight <-u interact with my stuff so much and i appreciate it so so so so so much!!!!! it makes me so happy when ppl play with my posts so tytytytyty :D

@robygoonn2 <-TSP FREN FUN CANADA LADY U ROCK UR SO COOL I GIFT U WITH BATTERY ACID AND HUGS AHHHHHHHHSJDJAKHDLEKS

@s0lk <-another tsp fren!!!!! huzzah!!!!! i like your art and your characters and ur fun to talk to and also quite funny and u characterize the narrator’s inner angsty boi very well ilysm ur cool <33333

and ofc @captain0fcrows, tysm for tagging me, u are possible one (some?) of the coolest people i have ever had the pleasure of interacting with in my life. ur awesome and u rock and ty again rhajskshflsjsksjlskdksks :D

favirote moots?

(People you tag have to reblog and say their favorite moots)

Okay wait

@ibrokeurheartbcuzubrokemine @foliverfalls @allyeilishh @addisonraesbaby @emiliesblohsh @bilsslut @noodleswashere @bilsbabyy @bitchesbrokenpromises @billsdollie

[suprababka]

Hiii! If it’s not a problem can I request a headcanon of waking OPM characters with head? :)

Hiii!👋 Of course it's not a problem, thank you for the request! :) Thirsty, aren't we?😉 (me too🤝) If something is not right, please let me know, and I'll fix it. Have fun!💕

Waking them up with giving them a head

T/W: NSWF content! Minors, do NOT interact!!!🔞🔞🔞 (also me: *writes for Metal Bat*... but he's at least 17... right?)

A/N: that's my 100th post, wow!🤩 (remember me saying in the previous post that I'd be free from now on? Well, I guess I underestimated the upcoming wave of deadlines and the exhaustion as a consequence, sorry as always😅 BUT NOW I ACTUALLY WILL BE MORE FREE SINCE I'M ON SUMMER HOLIDAYS, YAAAAY😎) (even Murata managed to upload new chapter meantime, lol)

Thanks for all the likes, comments, reblogs and following me! I really appreciate your feedback and support, guys!🥰🫶

You can check my masterlist to see more of my other works.

Prepare for possible OOC!

Also be aware of implied fem!reader!

(Sorry if there are any mistakes!)

And, most importantly, enjoy!!!

You wake up only to see your boyfriend sleeping with his mouth agape and sprawled out on the bed/mattress (as always)

And as you lift yourself up from his chest, you feel a bump against your butt

Yes, it's Saitama's morning wood

A mischievous smile appears on your face as you lick your lower lip

Maybe there is something in the air today or feeling your man's hard cock between your ass cheeks made you horny immediately

In any case, your playful mood rises

And in the next moment, your hands swiftly slip off Saitama's pants and underwear, making his dick spring out freely

Finding yourself starting to drool, you decide not to waste time and begin kissing and licking the tip

You glance at your man who is still sleeping like nothing is going on

You continue your ministrations, gradually taking in more and more his length

Meanwhile, Saitama is sleeping soundly, rarely twitching his fingers and moving his head

So there is a reaction after all...

But not enough

Your moves get more intense

Soon, your boyfriend unconsciously starts buckling his hips, his tip goes deeper in your throat

And you can feel it pulsing, meaning the upcoming release

Just a little bit more, and you will send Saitama over the edge

But suddenly, he sits up, screaming "AHHHH! GET AWAY FROM ME, I WON'T LICK YOUR POPSICLE!!!"

You stop, staring at your boyfriend with a surprised look

He is perplexed, both trying to come back to reality and to process what is happening

"What the hell are you doing?" he asks after watching you with the half of his dick inside your mouth for some time

His voice doesn't sound irritated, it's filled with genuine confusion

You sit up, chuckling and wiping away your saliva

"I'm waking you up, hun."

Saitama silently hisses, feeling his tip exposed to coldness, and immediately wraps his fingers around it

Even though he furrows his brows because of this, his eyes are full of desperate need to finish what you started

Smirking, you return attention to your man's dick and proceed to suck him off

This makes him ejaculate in no time

Swallowing the sperm, you innocently smile at your boyfriend

"Good morning, 'Tama! Hope you slept well."

Saying that last night was intense is an understatement

You can already feel soreness in your body as you begin to wake up

Opening your eyes, you see your boyfriend sleeping next to you

This surprises you as Genos is always the last one to fall asleep and the first one to wake up

Or maybe you got up too early?

The sun, shining through the curtains, tells you otherwise

Anyway, the S-class hero deserves the rest

You start getting up from the bed, trying to be as quiet as possible not to wake him up

And as you do that, you notice that Genos didn't take his cock off

He has never forgotten about it before

Poor thing, he must have been really worn out then

You suddenly remember his words that Dr. Kuseno made his dick more sensitive and almost the same as human organ

Almost...

You realize that your man doesn't have morning wood

It's not like it's a bad thing or something else

But it makes you wonder how does your boyfriend gets hard

Does he do it telepathically? Or there are some buttons? Or..?

You decide to conduct a small experiment: tease Genos and see if his erection will appear

Your fingers playfully caress his abdomen, getting closer to his length and running along it

The cock gradually rises

Aha, so S-class hero doesn't control it

Feeling enthusiastic, you start kissing and licking the dick

You get so engaged in this that you basically start sucking your man off and don't notice him waking up

"Y/n?" a calm voice which you love so much is heard

You come back to reality and realize what you're doing now

Embarrassed, you move away from him and don't dare to look into his eyes, feeling how they already scan you

Silence

You want to explain yourself, but don't know how

As you're about to say something, Genos speaks first

"Princess, did I not satisfy you the other night? I apologize as I thought you had more than enough due to falling asleep rather quickly after multiple lovemaking sessions. Please, let me fix my mistake."

Embarrassed, you chuckle and explain everything

After that, cyborg calmly tells you that his strap-on is connected to his nervous system, meaning that it functions like an organ

But there is a nuance: it's connected to anything related to the sexual arousal

...Well, it's what you understand from the long speech, full of different terms that you heard of for the first time in your life

After you thank S-class hero, a silence between you falls again

You can't help but still feel embarrassed

Especially when your boyfriend is still hard, despite him looking unfazed

He follows your gaze down to... his cock

"I'm sorry, Y/n. I will remove my strap-on now since it makes you uncomfortable."

Huh?

You stop Genos before he could pull it off and ask him if you can continue what you started

He is a bit surprised at your request, but lets you do your thing

After all, your wish is his command

Even though he'd prefer to pleasure you instead

Your tongue and lips do wonders to him

They feel like heaven on hid cock

And some time later, he fills your mouth with his cum

You swallow it and want to get up to start the day

But strong arms pin you against the bed

"Thank you for the blowjob, princess. Now, let me return the favor, please."

You wake up, feeling like something is practically glued to you

Of course, it's your boyfriend who is snuggling against you like a koala

And meanwhile he cutely snuffles into your ears, his morning hardness perfectly brushes between your legs

What a contrast

As much as you’d like to keep laying in bed, you can't ignore the appearing wetness in your panties

What a sleeping teaser Sonic is

Two can play the game

You carefully untangle from the strong grip and replace yourself with a pillow

Your hands move down to his cock and softly stroke him, making your man jolt

But he doesn't wake up

...Yet

It's time to bring out the big guns

Your mouth, namely

Your lips wrap around ninja's dick and start sliding down it

Sonic starts slightly moaning and sulking while tossing around

You continue doing your thing

And soon, he opens his eyes and looks at you confused

"Y/nnie? What are you doi– Ah-h..."

Poor baby can't even finish the question as he tilts his head back, moaning and rolling his eyes

Grinning you let go of him, standing up

Your boyfriend looks at you like a kid whose favourite candy was taken away from him

"Hey there, hedgehog. I was just checking your ninja skills. It could be anyone else instead of me, you know. You should be more careful."

"Wha... wha... what..?"

You chuckle and decide to tease Sonic further

"Since I woke you up, I'll go to the kitchen now to start making breakfast now. See you there!"

Your man blinks for a few times

Then he looks at his hard member and returns his gaze to your retreating silhouette

"Wait! Don't leave me alone like this! Hey! Please, mommy! I need your help! Please, Y/nniiiiieeeeee!!!"

Aw, how can you say no to such a cute face?

For some reason, the view of your boyfriend's hard dick tightening his pants always makes you feel things

Oh, and how do you love stroking it...

And today's morning is no exception

The first thing you see is a huge bulge in Garou's boxers

You instantly smirk, knowing what to do

There is no chance in hell you will skip the opportunity to tease him

You wrap your fingers around the hardness and start stroking it, watching the man's reaction

But he continues sleeping

Seriously?

Maybe getting rid of the underwear will make the cock more sensitive?

You take off Garou's boxers and proceed to masturbate his now exposed dick

And again, no result

It looks like you gotta put your mouth into use

Not that you mind it though

You start sucking your boyfriend off, regularly stealing glances at him

As you could have already guessed, the view before you doesn't change

Feeling frustrated, you begin to move your head more actively, taking the cock deep in your throat

You start enjoying this so much that you forget about your man and your desperate attempt to tease him

You concentrate on the way his tip reaches your throat and how your tongue and lips brush against the flesh

Soon, your mouth gets filled with sperm, and you swallow it

Satisfied, you lift your head up... and meet a pair of pleased golden eyes

Garou looks at you with a rather smug smirk on his face

His hands are crossed behind his head as if he is enjoying some show on TV

...

This bastard was pretending to be asleep the whole time

"Good morning, sweetheart. Well, I don't know about you, but I had a wonderful start of the day... I could get used to waking up like that, you know."

Just don't be surprised to get up feeling how long fingers stretch out your pussy the next morning

A smile spreads across your face before you even open your eyes

It's because you can feel your man's arms wrapped around you and his hot breath against your neck

S-class hero finally gets a rest that he deserves so much after an exhausting week

Zenko is on her mini school trip, so it's just you and your boyfriend

Feeling a sudden wave of affection towards Badd, you face him and caress his cheek, peppering his face with kisses and simply admiring his beauty

In return, he hums in his sleep, pressing you closer against him... and his morning wood

A thought crosses your mind

It's late morning, so why not to give Metal Bat a pleasant awakening?

Grinning, you carefully escape from his grip and remove his pants and boxers

You spit on your fingers and grind his cock

Your boyfriend moans softly, but still doesn't wake up

You leave a trail of kisses along his length and peck his tip, making Badd slightly move and grab the sheets

Proceeding to the next step, you gradually take your man's dick in your mouth and start moving your head up and down

Young hero starts openly moaning, tightly gripping the sheets and tossing and turning

Soon, his tip starts pulsing and his moans get deeper

Metal Bat unconsciously buckles his hip, shoving his cock deep down your throat

Your movements become more intense, and your boyfriend cums not long after

He loudly moans and sits up, opening his eyes, while you get filled with his sperm

And stares at you confused as you turn your head to look at him, grinning after consuming his release

His eyes widen, a pure terror appears on his face

"Zenko!.. She didn't hear us, did she?!"

You chuckle and remind him that his sister is away

Badd exhales relieved

He processes what just happened and listens to you, saying that you wanted to give him a pleasant surprise

Unexpectedly, he covers your lips with his and leaves a trail of kisses down your wet pussy

Now it's time for him to show you his gratitude

Your sex life with Amai is full of different experiments and filled with passion

Mostly, it's Mask who thinks of something new or spices things up

Don't worry, you also take part in diversifying your fun in bed

And as for now, you're pulling your boyfriend's pajama and underwear off him meanwhile he sleeps soundly

Why?

Well... why not? ;)

You know how much Beaut loves it when you give him a head

So having you sucking off his dick must be a rather great start of the day for him, right?

Especially considering that both of you have a free day ahead

You start stroking your man's cock only to get no reaction from him

And even when you start pecking his tip, he continues to sleep

Without wasting time, your lips wrap around hardness and proceed to push it into your mouth with your tongue sliding along the flesh

You decided to have it little by little

And as you're about to move your head up, a hand stops you

"Come on, darling, we both know you can take much more than that."

Amai starts moving your head up and down with his hand

His dick goes deep down your throat as tears form in your eyes

Yeah, pop idol likes to be rough with you in bed

And you like it

Slurping, you continue sucking off your man

(or should I say getting your throat fucked?)

Some time later, he starts buckling his hips, making him go even deeper than before into you and practically stuffing your mouth with his balls

It means he's close now

A few more hard thrusts, and Sweet Mask fills your throat with his cum

You swallow it and receive a head pat as you get praised for performing a fantastic blowjob

And then Amai suddenly grabs you, pinning you on bed beneath him

You subconsciously press your wet pussy against his knee, which is already between your legs, wanting for more

Your boyfriend lowers his head and leaves a trail of kisses along your neck

As you arch your back to get closer to him, you feel him moving away and standing up from bed

"Let's brush our teeth first, and after that we can... return to our business."

...

What a teasing bastard

You wake up and notice that your man still sleeping

Now that's a rare sight since he almost always wakes up first

Usually, you either let him sleep... or mess with him

For example, draw him a mustache with toothpaste, wake him up by squeezing a lemon into his mouth or braid his hair

Or.... give him a head

Yes, that's what you're doing right now

Well, trying to do

Because as soon as your hands get on the waistband of his underwear, the ninja immediately opens his eyes and stops you

"What the hell are you trying to do?"

...Oops

How to explain this?

You try to reassure him that your intentions weren't bad and get a skeptical look from Flashy Flash

"Your so-called pranks usually leave me in disgust or you in disappointment. So stop whatever you were about to start."

He listens to your yapping about noble plans for god knows how long

(around five minutes)

Finally, he signs and reluctantly lets go of your hands

S-class hero can't help but feel intrigued by your bold advance on his morning wood

Usually, he is the one performing oral because, again, he feels uncomfortable at the thought of you having something shoved in your throat

So the blond is confused at your eagerness to suck him off and decides to enjoy the show

As you take him step by step, a huge wave of pleasure spreads across his body

He lets out a soft groan, tilting his head back and closing his eyes

His hand subconsciously moves to the back of your head and supports it, gently helping you

The deeper his dick goes down your throat, the closer he gets to his release

Ah, it feels so good

As for you, it's safe to stay you're fully engrossed in the process... and feel aroused as well

And your fingers that desperately rub your wet pussy don't help much

You increase your pace and start feeling your man's tip pulsing

(and the way your cunt throbs too)

Soon enough, Flashy Flash cums in your mouth, and you swallow everything without wasting a single drop

You both stare at each other with a heat in your eyes

This is not enough

Not even saying a word to each other, you both begin to move

Your ass faces the man as he lowers his head and lovingly flicks his tongue between your folds

The show must go on

Zombieman's groans mix with your slurping and muffed moans, filling the room

Your mouth gets ravished by your boyfriend's dick as he slams his balls against your lips with a loud smack

His tip harshly reaches your throat, brushing against your tonsils

A few drops of saliva run along your neck and splatter on your bare chest, joining the other ones

The man's moves quicken, signaling his upcoming release

Just a few more thrusts, and, and!..

You open your eyes

It was just a dream

What the hell

Thanks to such vivid vision in your head that you probably won't forget about for the day, you find yourself feeling thirsty

But not for the water

You look at your sleeping man who nuzzles against you

... and whose morning wood perfectly slides along your needy pussy

Being in a daze, you slightly grind your folds against his hardness

Ah, shouldn't have done that

Because your horny mood only rose

What to do?

You don't want to wake Zombieman up

Nor you want to help yourself in the bathroom

Because what you're really craving is filling your mouth with the hero's cock

Without realizing it, you move your hands to his boxers and slip them off, freeing his dick

In the heat of the moment, you start covering it with kisses and caressing it

Soon, you take it in your mouth, moaning in pleasure

Loud enough to wake your boyfriend up

He blinks, staring at you and trying to come to his senses

Maybe it's still a dream?

But it feels too real though

S-class hero pinches himself

Turns out, this is actually happening

You're sucking his cock

And when your tongue goes over that special spot, he lets out a deep groan, tilting his head back and closing eyes

He continues enjoying your mouth worshiping his length, telling how good it feels and brushing away strands of your hair (if there are any)

And do you know what can make this even better?

A morning cigarette

He reaches over to the nightstand and places a cigarette between his lips, igniting it

Zombieman takes a big drag and slowly exhales

Perfect, just perfect

(if you're uncomfortable with the smoke and smell, then he doesn't do it)

You begin gulping down more and more of his dick, feeling how your man unconsciously buckles his hips and how his tip pulses

And soon enough, he lets go

You swallow the sperm as he puts out a cigarette

"Dear, you're going to be the death of me one day, you know."

You just give him a mischievous smirk which makes him to grin in return

In the next moment, you're pushed to your back and your legs are spread open as two fingers enter your pussy

"Now, let me please you as well."

You and King sometimes like to watch porn and hentai together

Why?

Firstly, to get aroused (not that you both have problems with that, but it helps to settle the mood)

Secondly, you do it just for fun (there even were cases where you got into plot and watched only for it)

And thirdly, to get new ideas for sex or to understand how to do some poses

And one day, you get a glimpse of a video title where a girl wakes her boyfriend up with a blowjob

King doesn't notice it, but you decide to try out this when the opportunity arrives

Meaning, the next morning

When you free your boyfriend's cock, you start smoothly stroking it

King instantly moves his head, whimpering

But still doesn't wake up

You take the next step: pepper his hardness with kisses and lick it there and there

S-class hero starts moaning

And now it's time for the main "event"

You gradually take his dick and start sucking him

Man's moans get louder as you pick up the pace

His cock starts twitching rather quickly, signaling the building release

And as King is about to cum, he opens his eyes and sees your head between his legs

He doesn't even question what is going on because his mind is focused on reaching the peak

Just a little bit more, and some more, and–

"I'm coming!"

But he doesn't

You let go of him and look at his desperate face

Blue eyes are filled with pleading to finish what was started

But you don't give in so easily

"Mm? Why are you looking at me like this, baby?"

"I need... to cum..."

"And what does this have to do with me?"

"Please... finish..."

"Huh? I don't really understand. Speak louder."

"I... I... Please, finish what you started!"

"Eh? What exactly I started?"

"Giving me a head..."

"So you want me to suck you off?"

"Y-yes!"

"And what is the magic word?"

"Please! I'm begging!"

You chuckle

"Alright, since you ask so nicely."

You lower your head and proceed giving him a head

King is already tense and about to ejaculate

So one playful bite on his tip makes him go over the edge

He pants, looking at you swallowing his cum and then smirking

"Good morning, King! I hope you don't mind that I took an idea on how to wake you up from one adult vid."

"What... what the hell just happened?"

[a-host-of-dancing-daffodils]

HOKAI so I have been wanting to do a post about this for a while so in order to distract myself from The Horrors here we go!!

What's Up With the Countess??

I'd like to start by pointing out that this analysis is almost entirely based on Episode 3.7 of the show (The Double Clue) because I haven't read any of the books that she's in / mentioned in. SO. Feel free to Take All of This with a Grain of Salt. But. as far as the show is concerned. I believe I am. Onto Something Here.

While I do think that the Countess if she's even really a Russian Countess...we'll get there DEFINITELY has the hots for Poirot (I mean. Who could blame her? He is Very Sexy), I do NOT think Poirot wants her carnally at all. He does seem compelled by her. And he does seem to both Respect Her Methods and Want to Study Her Like a Bug. And he seems to relate to her as a refugee a great deal and, from this, seems to feel a bit protective of her in some ways. But let's take a look at how he actually interacts with her, and it'll become clear: the attraction seems to be VERY one-sided, and it seems to on the part of the countess, not on the part of Poirot. This is especially clear if we contrast their interactions with the way Poirot acts around Hastings (with whom. we all know that Poirot is actually in love. and I will Die on that Hill Thank You Very Much).

Anyroad! I will put most of this post under a readmore because it got superduper long. like. it is now legitly essay-length and yes there are citations LOL

Итак. Начнем. [So. Let's begin] The way Poirot acts when he first sees the Countess, I can get why Hastings thinks he was "taken" with her. But.

If you ask me, I think it's quite the opposite: she was quite taken with him right away, and I think he picked up on this...and immediately thought "Oh. Oh, I can use this".

Case in point: We see him use another person's attraction to him to probe into their involvement in a case in other episodes, too, such as in 10.3 After The Funeral:

And that's what his interactions with the Countess feel like to me especially since, as he talks to her, she seems to be bent on giving herself away to him?? at nearly every opportunity??

But his interactions with the Countess differ from the other cases of him doing this in two ways. For one, they have the added aspects of him understanding what she's gone through as a refugee and relating to her in this way. In some ways, he seems to understand why she would turn to a life of crime, and it seems like he very much respects her, but (for two) because of this, he wants to warn her away from trying to live this lifestyle in HIS territory. During their interactions, he is CONSTANTLY implying that he IS onto her and he WILL Get Her if she's not careful. Which. only seems to make her want him more? and. I mean. Fair I guess. He's So Sexy when he's Dangerous.

First, during their initial little promenade together, he tells her that he's the most famous detective in all of England - this is a bit of a downplay from his usual "greatest detective who ever lived" shtick, which I always found to be a bit odd...but when you really sit down and think about it, it almost feels like he's firing a warning shot across her bow...Like he's trying to warn her that he's on her trail, and England specifically isn't big enough for the both of them.

and don't even get me STARTED ON THE IMAGERY HERE of the stone ornament in the foreground LITERALLY SEPARATING THEM FROM EACH OTHER as they talk about this???? LIKE!!??? HELLO???

Then. After this, SHE'S the one who brings up that he's investigating the jewel thefts (plural), and he smiles as he says, "It seems a simple matter, Madame." Like. 'Oh yes. And I already know who did it.'

And when she ASKS HIM IF HE SUSPECTS HER, he turns it right back on her by asking "Should I?" And she admits "I was there". IMPLYING SHE WAS ON THE SCENE OF EVERY. SINGLE. ONE. OF THE JEWEL THEFTS. NOT JUST THE LATEST ONE. LIKE??? JUST CONFESS TO HIM OUTRIGHT THAT YOUDONEIT, WHY DONT'CHA???

And then, when they're at the museum, she brings up a specific one of the jewel thefts, implying that it is 'the perfect crime', and he fires another few warning shots, implying that he knows it was her:

"It is strange that you should choose to relate this to me, Countess, I also have read of it. Oh yes, the Atherton Diamonds? And it is true that the police, they were confounded, but it is because they look with the eye that is too, uh...English"

He then MENTIONS that the police failed to think of who the lowest common denominator was - who was present for all of the thefts?

and then he all but points the finger at her when he says "Because the culprit, he is not English enough".

And Look at their expressions here! She seems to be very exited by the danger he poses to her. She is leaning in. She is INTO this. But Poirot's little smile? That isn't an I'm Into This smile. That looks like his I'm Onto You smile. It doesn't even really reach his eyes.

^^^^That^^^^? is NOT the smile of a smitten man.

Now THIS? THIS is the smile of a smitten man:

Like. When Poirot meets Hastings again at Styles? When he smiles that fond little smile at Hastings in so many different episodes?? His WHOLE FACE smiles. His eyes. His nose. His cheeks. His lips. He positively Glows with it. You look at that smile and you can FEEL the fondness radiating off of him.

He smiles at the Countess? and there's nothing in his eyes but a warning. In fact, sometimes when he's smiling "at" her, he's ACTIVELY LOOKING AWAY from her.

Which leads us to some other points about Poirot's behaviour and body language when he's around the Countess: Poirot seems to be very Pointedly Keeping the Countess at Arm's Length, which. He kinda does that to everyone, sure (in some ways, he even keeps Hastings at arm's length, too). But. I feel like many of his particular behaviours towards the countess wouldn't make sense if he was actually interested in her:

Firstly. Taking Poirot's own understanding of Love as our definition, when someone is in love with someone else, they smile at them and can't take their eyes off them (see episode 11.3 The Third Girl). and if you take another look at those pictures above, you'll see: Poirot's behaviour towards HASTINGS fits this definition quite well, actually.

And sure, Poirot smiles at the Countess sometimes. But, as I mention above, HE BARELY LOOKS AT HER WHEN THEY'RE TOGETHER. And half the time, he's looking off into space and he seems to be deep in thought.

During their first little promenade scene, he glances at her all of three times, and each time, it is for less than 2 seconds. He's not gazing at her like a man infatuated.

He gazes at Hastings, though. (Oh my, does he GAZE at Hastings. And Hastings gazes right back.)

Secondly, the Countess calls Poirot 'Hercule' twice in this episode, and each time, he doesn't seem to like it very much.

When the Countess calls Poirot 'Hercule' for the first time, it's at the museum. In response, he simply says "I do not think that there is anyone of my acquaintance who calls me by that name" (I would read that as a clear reminder that, она - знакомая, а не друг, и для русскоговрящего, это - очень важное различение [she's an acquaintance not a friend, and that is a very important distinction for a Russian speaker]). And when she apologises, he doesn't reassure her that it's alright. He doesn't say something to the effect of "Oh, it is alright for you to call me Hercule, I was simply surprised". No. He says "Madame." and goes DEAD SILENT. Almost as if to say "Yeah. Don't call me that." It's like he's saying "You're not allowed to get close to me. Don't Even Try."

And here's him looking away from her right after it happens. Again, I feel like he'd at least be looking at her if he was actually happy to be called that again

The second time she calls him Hercule, it's when she's about to leave on the train:

"Oh, I won't forget you, Hercule." "Nor I you... countess."

When he answers her, HE ANSWERS WITH HER TITLE, NOT HER NAME, and he doesn't even lean into her kiss look at how far out the window she's leaning, like. c'mon.

Which brings us to my third point: he doesn't seem to want to touch her. And when she touches him, he doesn't seem to know how to Handle It.

Like. To provide contrast for this, we know he touches Hastings every chance he can get, because whenever he gets an excuse, it's clear that he wants to touch him so bad. Just for one in-episode example, in the wound-care scene, he's feeling guilty for putting Hastings in danger, so he leaves his hand on Hastings' shoulder for a good. like. 20-30 seconds. He wants Hastings to feel his remorse, and so he lets his hand linger. and watch closely the next time you watch this episode, because when it's time for him to leave, he doesn't just take his hand away, he lets it slowly slip off Hastings' back like he doesn't want to let go.

And don't even get me STARTED on Hastings' Biting little Jealous "Where are you taking her?" Comment BABY IT'S OKAY HE'S NOT ACTUALLY INTO HER YOU ARE HIS ONE AND ONLY LOVE

He does touch the countess at the Picnic, but it's only for a moment, and, the way the shot is framed so that we never see his expression as he reacts to the touch? it really seems to be more for her benefit than it is for his own.

And when the countess takes his arm at the museum, he doesn't smile, he doesn't blush or look flustered. No. He was smiling to himself right before that, and the second she takes his arm, he looks surprised and he actually STOPS SMILING. Look at the set of his eyebrows...pointing down towards the bridge of his nose instead of up. He almost looks annoyed.

^^I don't feel like this is the behaviour of a man who is happy to be receiving attention from someone he's attracted to. I feel like this is the behaviour of a man who is NOT into this at all, but he's gotta keep stringing her along if he wants to distract her from stealing more jewels^^

Which brings us to my next point: Yes, he's 'taking her out on dates' or 'letting HER take HIM out on dates' or whatever. But when you think about why he's doing this? He seems to be trying to Keep Her Occupied. No more jewel thefts? No more threats to Japp's career.

and again. DON'T EVEN GET ME STARTED ON THE IMAGERY HERE. She's reclining on the blanket and he's not even reclining next to her!! He's frikken SITTING IN A CHAIR ABOVE HER. That's not "I'm into this person" behaviour!!!

Perhaps he's doing this as an experiment - if there is a robbery while they are together, he can eliminate her as a suspect, but if not...

Of Course. He Can't eliminate her as a suspect. Because He Knows She Totally Did It. But he kinda feels sorry for her. Because in some ways? He can relate to losing everything. In some ways, he respects her. And in some ways, he thinks of what she does as a necessary evil.

He tells us as much at their picnic together when he implies to her that it's criminals (like her) that give him job security. Perhaps he respects how smart she is and how well she was able to commit the crime he was brought in to investigate (even though he obviously saw right through her from the very beginning). And perhaps he also respects that, despite her chosen occupation, she chooses to be a Refined and Proper Lady who Doesn't Kill People and Only Robs Rich People. And that she's clearly someone with a method. All things Poirot can respect/appreciate.

THEN. TO KEEP HER OCCUPIED WHEN HE CAN'T DO IT HIMSELF, he gets two other private detectives to keep an eye on her, implying that they're there to make sure she leaves the country without doing any more crime: "during your time here in England, there have been four very clever robberies. I do not wish for you to be involved in a fifth."

SO. Poirot basically spends the entire episode trying to give the Countess time to run away and continue her...somewhat necessary work Somewhere Else Please And Thank You and to sneakily tell her 'England isn't big enough for the both of Us. Don't You Dare Let Me Catch You Being a Thief in My Town Ever Again Or I Will Not Be Able To Give You A Second Chance And It Will Greatly Sadden Me.'

And he says it right out loud when he says: "You must continue your work and I must continue mine. But not in the same country."

AND FINALLY, and perhaps most importantly, let's get to the whole reason I started writing this post in the first place: What's UP with the Countess??

Well. I don't think she's the Countess Vera Rossakoff at all. I don't even think she's actually Russian.

What? Yes. Listen.

So She's supposed to be this countess-turned-refugee from Petrograd (which is known today as St. Petersburg)? Okay. You know what? Fair. I would absolutely buy that she's a refugee given that she seems to understand what it's like to lose everything. And it is clear that she is familiar enough with Russia to understand something about Russian impressionist artists and to know that an educated Russian person at the time would absolutely know how to speak French.

And she does make a compelling statement when she calls the city she is supposedly from Petrograd (even though by the time when the episode is set, it would have already been renamed to Leningrad); By calling the city Petrograd and not Leningrad, she's invoking a time period during The Great War when anti-german sentiments were enough to take the german-root words Sankt and Burg out of the city's name, but of course, in her case, right up until the Bolsheviks rose to power, which would supposedly be a clue as to when she left Russia.

So Why don't I think she's Actually Russian if she does all these things """correctly"""?

Well. I'm a Linguist. So my impression is mostly based on how she speaks.

First of all, we never actually hear her speaking Russian (only French and English), and the way she speaks English doesn't follow some of the more frequent patterns of Russian phonotactics and grammatical constructions that often find their way into Russian speakers' English. For example, she uses the sound [ð] (the "th" sound in words like "this" and "the"), which is a notoriously difficult sound for Russian speakers to learn because it's not a sound that's found in Russian, and even her education in French wouldn't be able to help her master that sound, because it's not a sound Parisian French speakers typically use either. Moreover, she uses definite and indefinite articles (the words "the" and "a" respectively), which are notoriously difficult for native Russian speakers to learn because Russian does not have these articles. Her education in French should help her with these, but even if it did, she would probably use more of them than a native English-speaker would expect (kind of like Poirot does) because articles are used in more places in French -- and she doesn't.

Second of all, she doesn't use Russian intonational patterns in the places I would expect to hear it. For example: she asks 'Do you suspect me?' with a rising intonation at the end of the phrase. Based on the Russian intonational patterns most commonly used with questions, I would expect a Russian speaker to say 'Do you suspect me?', emphasising the focal word instead and ending the phrase with a falling intonation.

(Obviously, in reality, these little quirks of her speech are probably just due to writing choices and the actress not knowing much about speaking Russian / probably not having an accent coach, but. It's fun to come up with little in-universe explanations for these things!!)

SO. Let's be real, lads. A jewel thief could absolutely assume the identity of a dead Russian countess if she said all the right things & had enough money from hocking her wares to buy a really nice wardrobe and some good luggage / manage to look and act the part.

But the simplest--and, if you ask me, most damning--piece of Evidence-That-She's-Not-Russian of all?

That would be her saying that she has no use for the cigarette case Poirot tries to give her because she read the initials engraved there as the English letters 'B' and 'P'.

AND POIROT IS THE ONE WHO HAS TO EXPLAIN TO HER that those symbols also stand for the 'V' and 'R' sounds in Russian!!!!

AND WHEN HE DOES, she only looks dumbfounded and says "You've been studying!"

If she was really a Russian Speaker? She would have taken one look at the BP on that cigarette case and read it as a 'V' sound & an 'R' sound just as easily as reading it as English "B" & "P".

Source? As a bilingual English-Russian Speaker myself, what happened in my head immediately upon seeing that cigarette case at the beginning of the episode. Was that my brain unhelpfully lol supplied both the English Phrase "Blood Pressure" and the Russian Word "время" (time), which starts with those two letters.

I would argue that. If the Countess was really a Russian speaker, a similar kind of thought process should have happened in her brain, too. And given that Russian is supposedly her first language (or at least one of the ones she would have had the most exposure to), she should have read those letters as 'V' & 'R' first. But this so-called Vera Rossakoff? Reads these letters as the English 'B' & 'P'? Come ON.

Now. I guess you could argue that, since she was in England and speaking English with Poirot at the time, that she would have been ""In English Mode"" and that she could have "Not Been Thinking" that BP also makes the 'V' & 'R' sounds in Russian.

But. There is a lot of literature out there in the psycholinguistics world to suggest that multilinguals cannot suppress one of their languages to that extent (especially not a language one has supposedly known since birth) - and most recent scholarship on competition between a multilinguals' languages agrees on one thing: words and sounds in all the languages known to the multilingal are activated in the brain during linguistic processing.

There are many psycholinguistics studies which delve into these mental processes. In case you're interested in the scholarship on this particular topic, here's some links: Here's one that talks about between-language competition during reading in multilinguals who speak languages with different scripts (English vs. Korean): Moon & Jiang (2011) Here's one that talks about between-language competition between words with a similar orthography (spelling) during reading in Dutch-English Bilinguals: van Heuven, W. J. B., Dijkstra, T., & Grainger, J. (1998) And here's a couple of studies by the same people that focus on a similar kind of between-language competition in Russian-English bilinguals specifically (although it's about spoken language instead of reading, but the mechanisms in the brain are probably very similar): Marian & Spivey (1999); Marian & Spivey (2003)

All of the above scholarship basically suggests that, when someone is processing words or sounds, even if the sounds/words of one of their languages do eventually get less activation than those of another, there is always some activation of all languages known to the multilingual at any given time during processing, and that competition between languages for activation differs depending on how familiar a speaker is with a given language (in other words, the more familiar the person is with a specific language, the more likely its words/sounds/etc. are to get activated in the brain during perception or production).

ANYWAY. I'M SORRY I KNOW SOME OF THAT WAS WORD SOUP. BUT LADS?? ALL I'M REALLY FUCKEN SAYING. IS SHE DAMN WELL SHOULD HAVE RECOGNISED HER OWN FUCKING INITIALS.

THEREFORE. TLDR??? I DON'T THINK SHE'S REALLY A RUSSIAN SPEAKER. BECAUSE ANY RUSSIAN SPEAKER WOULD SEE THE LETTERS ON THAT CIGARETTE CASE AND READ 'V' & 'R' FIRST. AND IF SHE DIDN'T RECOGNISE SOMETHING SHE SHOULD HAVE BEEN GETTING FAMILIAR WITH FROM THE TIME SINCE SHE STARTED LEARNING HOW TO READ, I DON'T THINK THOSE ARE REALLY HER INITIALS.

AND I BROUGHT A BIBLIOGRAPHY TO PROVE IT.

ALSO. TO RECAP MY POINTS FROM EARLIER. POIROT WAS NEVER INTO HER, EVEN THOUGH EVERYONE--INCLUDING HASTINGS--THOUGHT HE WAS.

NO. HE WANTED TO STUDY HER LIKE A BUG BECAUSE SHE'S A JEWELLERY THIEF WHO IS GOOD ENOUGH AT HER 'CHOSEN OCCUPATION' TO IMPERSONATE A RUSSIAN COUNTESS AND BASICALLY GET AWAY WITH IT, DESPITE ALL THE STUPID MISTAKES SHE'S BEEN MAKING. AND, LIKE A BUG, POIROT CAN APPRECIATE HER PLACE IN THE ECOSYSTEM, AS LONG AS IT DOES NOT INCLUDE HIS HOUSE.

IN THIS EPISODE, HE BASICALLY PUTS HER IN A GLASS JAR FOR A FEW DAYS TO OBSERVE HER SO SHE WILL STOP WREAKING HAVOC AND THEN HE PUTS HER OUTSIDE AND TELLS HER NEVER TO COME BACK INTO THE HOUSE AGAIN, OR ELSE.

AND!!! LET ME REITERATE!! THAT!!! HERCULE POIROT!!! IS IN LOVE!! WITH ONE PERSON!! AND ONE PERSON ONLY!! AND THAT PERSON'S NAME IS CAPTAIN ARTHUR J.M. HASTINGS!!!

I REST MY CASE YOUR HONOUR.

Anyway!!!! TLDR-TLDR: If you ask me, Poirot's behaviour towards the countess isn't that of a Man in Love. It's the calculating behaviour of someone who knows a good adversary when he sees one (even if her attraction to him made her transparent from the start) and a man who would feel a little like he was vandalising an exquisite forgery of a Rembrandt if he had to go and get her arrested - like. Sure, she may not be the real thing, but damn, is she good at playing her part.

AANYWAAY Now that I have shouted my opinions at the subway walls. I will stop here. because this post has already gotten entIRELY too long.

If you made it this far in this post, thank you very much for reading my ramblings to completion!! I hope you enjoyed them!! Спасибо за ваше внимание!!

[blocksruinedme]

Update: Skizzleman's youtube subs used to be public and included lots of far right assholes. And he's mentioned listening to Joe Rogan's podcast.

[That's the summary there, you can stop reading if that's all you need to know, the rest of this is just some details and me expressing my feelings. At length.]

So after I made my last reblog I went back to #skizz situation and, well, turns out in 2021 Skizz's youtube subs were public? And he subscribed to far right assholes? YEAH IT'S GREAT.

Like Joe Rogan and Ben Shapiro and Prageru (and oann, zeducation, steven crowder, timcast, and anthony brian logan).

Ha ha ha ha ha ha! What a fool am I, what assumptions I made. I assumed Skizz was at least left of center, but grew up in the 90s and learned including *everyone* is a virtue. (Like I did!)

This isn't that. This isn't "being friends with people you disagree with", it's not even "putting people who hate them in positions of power over your fans". It's not being willing to tell us the truth about how we don't matter, it's accepting the support and profiting from and living off people he wouldn't stand up for in the most minor way. Of course he thinks "trans rights!" is political, because he thinks it's politics, not human rights. As he reportedly said on his podcast this week, he doesn't care what anyone thinks.

Skizzleman does not care what you think.

Skizzleman does not care if his friends might want you dead.

He's deep in red america and he's not your friend.

Skizz does not care about you.

[edit: after i wrote the rest of this post i searched "joe rogan skizz" on tumblr and found a post from 2024 saying Skizz has admitted to listening to the Joe Rogan podcast! I'm particularly sensitive to that one. (I am upset with my brother every day of my life for playing that for my niblings. My 10yo nephew randomly said we should kill Biden at a family party. Joe Rogan is not okay.) ]

Anyway, I found the links to 2021 posts about Skizz's *many* far right youtube subs in an ask on this blog. I was going to screenshot them all but I don't want to do that to personal posts that had very few notes, one of which asked for no reblogs, so I'm doing summary and screenshotting a big hc blog.

From what I can gather, in 2021, someone noticed what channels he was subscribed to and found a lot of far right bullshit. People talked about it on tumblr, shared some of the channels in posts and replies, and said "go look for yourself"[1]. He privated his youtube subs and made no statement[2] disavowing those views or anything to say that isn't part of who he is.

Skizz never disavowed the far right and he is still platforming publicly MAGA people.

(As someone who was an angry adult long before 2021, I want it to be clear that wasn't before the far right went mainstream and very bad. We knew those people were dangerous at least back in 2016. It wasn't subtle.)

The biggest post I could find about this was from the @hermitcraftheadcanons blog, which takes submissions about, well, hermitcraft head canons and has multiple mods, two of who were quoted in the 2021 post. The blog announced they were no longer accepting non-hermits, for multiple reasons but specifically for Skizz.

This is (part of) what they posted in 2021:

That's what I've got.

I'm not telling anyone what to do besides "don't harass people on tumblr for posts four years ago". Don't do that!

If you don't care if people hang out with and platform MAGA people, who are likely less extreme than what they watch on youtube, I literally do not have the energy to care. Do with this information what you will. (If this hurts you, I'm truly sorry. Caring about non-fictional people is dangerous, I can't imagine how I would feel if this was one of my blorbos. Be kind to yourself.)

But me? I'm fucking disgusted. I daydream about telling off my MAGA family members, I am not giving a pass to someone who isn't my friend and who made sure to emphasize this week, weeks after this all went down, how much he doesn't care about anyone's opinion or "being told what to do".

I know some people see not caring about other people's opinions as a virtue. I do not. Especially men in positions of power in any community, especially especially if the community is based around them!

The people in power are the ones who should care the most about what other people think.

I would be shocked if there was any hope of Skizz doing anything because some [whatever he would call us] told him to.

Finally: I have more to say that is about how terrible people find each other through "just a joke" but it's not about Skizz, so I'm tossing it under a cut, along with the footnotes:

So we found out about Skizz's mods, and I looked through some twitter screenshots until I felt uncomfortable. I hoped, but I really really worried, cause who people's friends are, the people they choose to be with not just friendly coworkers, says a lot about them. Because here's the thing about people hanging out with shitty people, often turns out... gestures heads toward any friends groups of abusers you know. I'm only talking about politics with Skizz, not anything else, but it is the same social process.

I was reblogging about "just a joke" last night. It's how people test the waters, to see who laughs at jokes about bigotry and terrible things I won't name here. And someone like me says "ugh wtf" and their friends defend them and I distance myself, and everybody who stood with the shithead has a fun little bond, whether they are aware of it or not. "Just a joke" is how nasty people find each other, to hang out and support each other's bigotry and abuse, support each other in building up power structures to abuse, things like that. In some cases, start bringing them to your favorite bar and see if they want to be a white supremacist too. It 's NOT a coincidence when abusers and bigots hang out. It's never every single person they know, don't immediately cancel every abuser/bigot's friends, but be fucking wary.

Footnotes about skizz in 2021

[1] I have found no screenshots but a mod investigated it and said no more Skizz, and enough people treated this as public information that it would a wild conspiracy theory to say everyone made it up.

[2] someone claimed to have talked to him in twitter dms but wouldn't even screenshot it. ""I talked to him in DMs on Twitter. He wants to keep all this as private as possible so I won't be posting screenshots, but he confirmed he didn't realize how extreme their views were, that he's not a bigot, and that he just likes to follow news sources on all sides.""

Sure, screenshots can be faked, but you're not even giving us that? If this conversation happened, I don't care! Meaningless!

[ceaseless-exhauster]

I was scrolling way back on my own blog to look for an old specific post, and I could see the progression of my unending joy and fervor for Judaism morph into fear and anger and defensiveness as things have gotten worse and harder, and, crucially, as I have become a more solidified and educated member of the community. This makes me deeply sad, so I’m going to fight it actively.

All that to say: Torah study last night was delightful. It was a small group this week, just four of us, but not only did we laugh much and do a lot of Hebrew decoding exploration (which is my 🎶faaaaaavoriiiiite🎵), but we ended up talking at great length about the relationship between HaShem and Moses.

We did this in the context of HaShem getting super into wrath and retribution, as they are wont to do, and Moses’s reaction is to basically say “okay, but like, if you kill your own people, everyone else is gonna think you’re a loser who couldn’t defend this people you promised to protect.” And it WORKS!!

So we were talking about how interesting it is that not only is Moses of course the only prophet in the Torah to whom G-d appears in person, but how much more of an equal footing they appear to be on, more of a partnership than anything else. Look at Avraham when he bargained for Sodom and Gomorrah: “yes HaShem you are great and powerful but I also believe you are merciful please let me search for one righteous person there.” Yaakov literally wrestled an angel. Joseph received dreams and had very earthly concerns about them.

Meanwhile, we have Moses - this man who, despite being raised as a prince of Egypt, is by all accounts a pretty terrible social leader whose little brother has to do most of the logistical stuff. And yet, he perhaps has the deepest relationship with HaShem. He has the kind of relationship where G-d can appear right in the Tent for the sole purpose of looking Moses in the eye to proclaim “I am deeply hurt and angry!!” and Moses has the standing to say “I understand that, but you have a bad plan about it.” Isn’t that wild??

I’m glad this week was Sh’lach L’cha, there was so much in there to talk about and explore and it did so much to remind me of the simple fact that I LOVE Judaism!!! I’m gonna do my best to continue to embrace that more often even in the face of everything. I hope everyone is having a restful Shabbos 💙

[redsugarx]

宋抹胸 Song Moxiong Sewing Construction

(not really a tutorial bc I don't go over how to hem/seam stuff together but close enough)

Yesterday @dragonaeve asked about the pattern for the triangle pleat moxiong in the server so I thought I'd just post it in here too lol, it's dead easy to make (coming from the clothing designer who can barely actually sew)

Some data from 花山墓 for your viewing pleasure:

Here, off Twitter but data has been corroborated with at least 3 other sources, shown is 菱形朵花紋絹抹胸, the last one in the table. This one doesn't have a chest band but a lot of people prefer having it these days bc of friction and also wear & tear purposes so I added it

onto the making

Step One: Make Some Wrecked Angles

Cut out 4 rectangles:

1x MAIN BODY: H = however long you want the garment to be (usually 30-60cm), W = your chest circumference * 1.5

1x CHEST BAND: H = chest band width (usually 3-5cm) * 2, L = (chest * 1.5) - (d¹ * 2)

2x RIBBONS: H = ribbon width (2-4cm) * 2, L = ribbon length (usually like 50-150cm, kinda whatever)

¹ d is half the difference value in the top/bottom lengths. You can either do a triangle pleat, inverse box pleat, or no pleat. The bigger the d value is the more pronounced the curvature. See next step for d value.

ALSO ADD SEAM ALLOWANCE AND STUFF

Step Two: Choose Your Fighter

Choice 1: No Pleat

d = 0. You don't have to do anything queen sit back n relax

-

Choice 2: 三角褶 Triangle Pleat (aka dart)

d = 5cm if you're mimicking the Huashan artifact but most people like to go smaller than that so u can adjust if u want

Fold that shit in half (wrong side out)

2. Sew this line to make this triangle in the corner (w = d, h = 2*d)

3. Unfold it (still wrong side out)

4. Either press the triangle thing to one side or squish it flat.

Tada

-

Choice 3: 工字褶 Inverse Box Pleat

d = ~2-5cm ish up to you

Fold that shit in half (wrong side out)

2. Make a W that's d/2 tall

3. Flip it and reverse it

4. Open the book and smush the ears flat

-

Step Three: Make A Sandwich

(You can add interfacing to the chest band first if u want it makes it easier. The ribbons are just tubes)

Obviously hem stuff and sew things together like normal lol otherwise that's it

Optional Toppings:

Make a vertical slit in the chest band at the 1/3 point for the ribbon to pass through when u tie it

If you don't got them Tang Dynasty sized titties, add loops for straps and/or sew straps directly onto the band

Add a lining (literally just another big rectangle that u sew to the main body and then proceed as usual)

Use different fabrics for the band and the body for funsies

Add trim between the band & body for decor

No chest band, sew ribbons directly to main body (more accurate to Huashan moxiong)

Fabric not wide enough for the main body? Sew a bunch of smaller rectangles together to make One Big Wrecked Angle. Make them out of different fabrics if you're feeling adventurous

Use already-made hair ribbons or satin ribbons for ribbons if u don't wanna sew tubes

[vvividlyy]

When you get this, reply with your favorite five fics that you've written, then pass on to at least five other writers. Let's spread the self-love 💞

aww thank you for asking !! I've only written 9 fics total hahah so this is gonna be most of them BUT!!

Better Than the Movies - Cherik, Explicit - I love when they're toxic and I love when they make each other cry and I love when they end up together at the end of it anyway <3 I should make a follow-up fic exploring some of the insecurities and issues that linger after Charles put Erik through the wringer, that sounds tasty. I tell ya what, if I get to 200 kudos on the fic I'll do that :D

Paper Rings - Cherik, Explicit - Hmmm another fic where they're toxic and madly in love... how about that. Actually this was meant to be very horny and toxic and then by the time I finished writing it, it was unbelievably gooey and sweet :') I reread this one sometimes bc I love it so much!

a late night craving - Cherik, Explicit (seeing a theme yet?) - my first foray into mpreg!! So fun, I love trying new things and I found myself surprisingly inspired by mpreg and the concept of Cherik starting a family together <3 I have two follow-up fics coming to this series and I'm so excited to share them eventually!!

Inevitably Yours - Cherik, Explicit - The first fic I've ever finished writing (outside of a oneshot or two along the way) and more importantly, the one that gave me the courage to post it!! I can't believe this was started just last Christmas. Everyone has been so unbelievably nice in the comments and it gave me the courage and confidence to keep writing, and now I write every day, I'm part of my first zine, and I've met so many wonderful people in the fandom!!! Ahhhhhh, sorry this was hardly about the actual fic itself LOL I love that too!!! I definitely reread it and see some perceived flaws but I also am always pleasantly surprised by little details I forgot about and also happy to see the ways in which I've grown as a writer.

The Lesson of You - Cherik, Explicit - MY BABYYYYY, it's my current novel-length wip about sad divorced DILF Erik, his family, and his kids' super hot super young tutor Charles ;) this fic is so comfy and cozy to write, it feels like a big hug :D and while Cherik aren't as toxic as they are in some of my other fics, that's because there's more than enough working against them already LOL. I have big plans for this fic and every chapter I write has something that I've been excited about getting to for a long time ^_^ Please give this a shot if you haven't already, the kudos and comments sustain me as I keep writing :D

THANK YOU FOR ASKING! I need very little prompting to talk about my fics, as it turns out... hahah I love the Cherik community so much and I love sharing my work with y'all. Thank you for having me <3

[mooncello]

Niall Appreciation Post

Niall Connelly is the best. Yes, I adore Dev. I talk about Dev a lot. But there's a million reasons why Dev loves Niall. He's the best.

Y'know how you wish certain characters could be real people? I wish that about Niall Connelly. Everyone should have a Niall in their life.

In advance of posting chapter 9 of more than a footnote (this Friday!), I want to nerd out a bit about my favorite nerd. 

But first: here is Niall's study playlist. Enjoy. 🩵

Niall Appreciation continues under the cut for length. Most of this is character stuff, not spoilers. But if you haven't read the fic yet, note there are some excerpts below.

Niall is such a nerd. footnote opens with Niall working on a trigonometry problem, an elective he takes because he loves math and angles. About halfway thru the fic, I had Dev call Niall "nerd" in an affectionate nickname kind of way, and it stuck.

“Hey,” I say, “stop stressing. You’ll be fine.” “Easy for you to say, nerd.” “You should give your brain a break,” Baz interjects. He caps his pen with a smooth click and slips the essay into his bag. “Cramming will only increase anxiety at this point. Decrease memory recall.” Dev’s face goes slack. “For real?” “You’ll be fine,” I repeat. “You’ve got this.” I smile at him, wide and drowsy, and flick my pencil on the tip of his nose. 

Niall loves architecture and wants to study it at university. He's a spatial thinker and loves geometry and design thinking and patterns.

The World of Mages is built upon words. I like building things with numbers. With tactile, solid materials. Patterns, angles, geometries. Where other students see opportunity in pop lyrics or Shakespeare, I see potential in space and shapes. I like that about me, despite sometimes feeling out of place at a school where you’re supposed to be obsessed with wands and words.

Niall is aspec. This has been an incredibly important part of his character from the very beginning. He's demi/gray ace, and I think he'd call himself demiromantic, too. He doesn't subscribe to relationship hierarchies or escalators. He loves Baz just as fiercely as Dev. Both those relationships are important to Niall. 

He's so pretty. And bony. All angles. I'll let Dev tell you:

His bony, gangly body makes me lose my fucking mind. I wanna bite every nub of bone, from his collarbones to his ankles and everything in between, and then suck kisses in those same places.

The half-moons of his eyelashes look dark against his pale milky skin, and his hair fluffs out around his head like a copper cloud.

Niall is flipping his pencil through his fingers, and I’m momentarily distracted by the knob of bone in his wrist. And the delicate webbing of his veins against pale skin. 

His coppery hair falls over his eyes as he bends over his notes, the cuffs of his Watford jumper pulled over his knuckles. The low lamplight along the study tables reflects a pale gold against his skin. He looks like one of those ancient scribes toiling away on the Book of Kells or some shit. Focused, illuminated, serious. Perfect.

And yet, despite being the very best friend in the world with a big beautiful brain and the biggest brownest eyes, he's got garbage self-esteem. He doesn't see himself as anything special.

So I'm very glad he has Dev to remind him that he's extraordinary.

Niall is pragmatic and rational. He keeps Dev grounded. (And Dev takes Niall on much-needed side quests.)

He's the king of sweatshirts. Dev likes to wear them. 

I stand and remove my jacket, dress shirt and trousers, and toss them on the ground by my dresser. Joggers go on. Then my favourite sweatshirt—soft and stretched out, with TOUCH GRASS printed across the chest. It used to be Niall’s. A charity shop find in Camden last summer. I kept stealing it to sleep in, and he eventually gave it to me so long as I promised to stop complaining about his morning alarm. The only downside to this exchange is that the sweatshirt no longer smells like him. And, y’know, the alarm thing still sucks, but, yeah, worth it.

Niall also likes oversized shirts, denim, soft sweaters, cozy joggers, and his sherpa-collar corduroy jacket. Natural fibers and lots of earth tones. He looks amazing in green, devastating in indigo blue.

His magic smells of forest and rain. 

Niall loves to read horror. Mysteries, too. (He likes to see if he can solve them before they're revealed.) In footnote, Dev enjoys manga, and Baz reads poetry. I like each of them having their own favorite genre. They're cute.

(For any superfans, footnote Niall and lost boys Niall have some points of connection. Both love video games, horror, and electronica.)

Niall may be rational, but he has a mischievous streak and doesn't have a problem with breaking certain rules. He's the one that started the trio's tradition of smuggling dessert onto the roof of Mummers, for example. He's also besties with a chaos demon. You just know the two of them got into so much mischief when they were 11. And 12. And—

One of my favorite Nialls is high Niall.

Niall is still looking at me. A soft smile takes possession of his mouth. “Your eyes are pretty.” My heart slams against my chest.  I know he doesn’t mean it like that. He’s hella high and just saying whatever comes to mind. He says it like any other kind of neutral observation. It rained last week. This hospital blanket is green. He won’t remember any of this in the morning.  I don’t have a chance to respond to his comment—or even breathe—before Niall follows up with, “And your hair is, like, those volcano rocks. The shiny dark kind. Ig…Ignatius.” “Igneous.” I’m not sure how I know that. His smile stretches wider. “Yeah, that.” His gaze returns to my hair. “Like obsidian. Volcanic glass.” He says the word again, stretching it out. “Glaaasss.”

But perhaps my favorite thing about Niall is that he sees to the heart of a person. He sees the heart of Dev, beneath the chaos and anger and irreverence.

Underneath all his swagger, he’s deeply good. And sincere. Annoyingly, he’s one of the most brilliant people I know; he just never applies himself. Says he’s already a disappointment to his family, and it’s easier to keep disappointing them than, I dunno, trying, I guess, which is utter bollocks. He’s so much better than the mould they cast for him. I wish he could see that.

And he sees Baz, as a best friend and a teenager:

Baz giggles at this, and he’s suddenly eighteen. Not the 40-year-old he holds himself to be so much of the time, stuffed with familial duty and self-loathing and enough existential angst to fill a philosophy textbook. Just a teenage boy who studies hard, loves poetry, and has a secret sweet tooth. “C’mon, let’s dance.” I stand and tug at his elbow. “No,” Baz whines. The song shifts, and the bright melancholy of The Cure fills the hall. My grip on his arm tightens. “Oh, come on. You love this shit.” He heaves a large sigh but he’s smiling again. “I do,” Baz says as he stands. Then he’s twisting his hips and lifting his arms above his head, eyes closed as he dissolves into the music. I grin and follow him to the dance floor. He’s such a dork.

He even sees Simon. Not as some heroic Chosen One or tragic story, but as the guy who just maybe loves his best friend.

To be loved is to be known. And Niall knows how to love. He does it selflessly. He does it with his whole heart.

I fucking adore him.

If you're still reading, you're a legend. And you probably adore Niall, too. Thanks for loving him. He deserves it.

technically this isn't a wipsday but I'm tagging y'all anyway:

@whatevertheweather @artsyunderstudy @cutestkilla @valeffelees @bookish-bogwitch

@drowninginships @rimeswithpurple @iamamythologicalcreature @leithillustration @alexalexinii

@fatalfangirl @larkral @orange-peony @hushed-chorus @run-for-chamo-miles

@brilla-brilla-estrellita @theimpossibledemon @fiend-for-culture @emeryhall @j-trow-95

@you-remind-me-of-the-babe @ileadacharmedlife @best--dress @confused-bi-queer @messofthejess

@roomwithanopenfire @shrekgogurt @stitchyqueer @monbons @youarenevertooold

@blackberrysummerblog @thewholelemon @skeedelvee

[valentineispunk]

Where the Light Gathers

Pairing: Jackson!Joel Miller x esoteric!Reader

Summary: You’re the preacher’s daughter. Joel’s the man with too much past and no patience for softness. He never meant to notice you. But you’re light. And he’s been in the dark too long.

Warnings/tags: not many for this chapter! Religious guilt, Joel feels bad for what he did in Salt Lake City, reader is OBSESSED with Joel (me 2 girl), reader is basically imprisoned?

A/N: Finally writing this story that’s been in my head for MONTHS. This is a very short and rushed chapter which I prefer because of my short attention span, BUT if you guys want longer chapters tell me pls!! Also any pictures of the reader throughout this short series do not depict how she is intended to look. The reader is of course YOU!

Word count: 1.5k

Your fingers danced across the peeling white paint of the chapel banister, flaking like rotten petals. The wood beneath was soft, weary from seasons of steam and sun and hymnals. You liked the feel of it — something that used to be new, now turned gentle by time.

Below, the congregation shifted in their pews — men in patched flannel, women with braid-wrapped buns, children with quiet, wide eyes. The air buzzed with breath and reverence, all of it threaded with the faintest scent of candle wax. From up here, it felt like watching a play. A strange, tender imitation of the old world.

The gallery smelled of dust and song. You’d always thought it was the best place in Jackson.

You were careful not to even breathe too loudly. Papa didn’t know you were here. He thought you were still tending to Atticus’s sore hoof — a lie so small it might’ve blown away in the wind, if it hadn’t been weighed down by purpose.

You had fed Atticus, yes. Brushed the straw from his mane. Whispered to him about the weeds in the garden — how they stretched toward the sky, reaching for something they didn’t even have a name for. You wondered if that’s what you were doing, too.

Your boots had carried you here without much thought. Past the edge of the pasture. Past the silent disapproval in your father's eyes when he spoke about the town — “too much sin in the soft places,” he’d said once, though you weren’t sure what that meant.

So here you were, yet again, hidden in the high rafters, looking down on all that noise and stillness. You liked to watch people. The way their faces turned toward the pulpit, the way they held their silence like water in their hands.

You thought that might be what brings you here most Sundays. You imagined what they might be thinking. If they believed what papa said. If the words comforted them, or just kept their hands busy while grief curled in their chests like smoke.

You caught your thoughts before they could wander further — decided they were probably sinful — and forced yourself to move on.

Your eyes flickered across the slur of old button-ups and knee-length gowns until they landed near the back, on the two people you always watched most.

A tan man with dark curls and freckled skin. He sat beside the same woman he always did — dark-skinned, with braided hair and full lips that didn’t smile often but looked like they used to.

You’d decided, quietly and without needing proof, that they were your favorite people in Jackson. Within the first few weeks of moving here, you’d chosen them — because something in their posture seemed both nurturing and unshakable, and because everyone else seemed to listen when they spoke.

Beside them, though, was someone new. A man you didn’t recognize.

Rough-looking. Sun-seamed. His shoulders were broad like the fence posts out by the pasture, and just as worn. His face was set — not angry, not calm — just… braced, like someone waiting for a blow. Wide brown eyes, the color of dead leaves you picked from the animals’ fur in the fall.

He stood out, the way the horses did when they wandered their way into the sheepfold. Restless. Wounded. Wild and out of place.

Your heart did something strange then.

Not fear, and certainty not joy. Just… something that wanted to reach.

It was too much. Too sharp, too sudden, and growing. You could feel the weight of it settling in your bones, and without another thought, you decided to leave.

It was best to sneak away before the service ended anyway, being seen was a wildfire you couldn’t afford.

You were halfway to the stairs when you heard it — a voice, low and Southern, rising just below the gallery’s arch.

This voice was gravel and warmth, pulled tight with worry.

“I don’t know, Tommy. Don’t feel right, sitting in there pretendin’ like this makes up for it.”

You froze. Not on purpose — your body just stilled, like a doe catching wind of smoke.

Another voice answered — lighter, faster. One you’d heard before. The freckled man with curls.

“Ain’t nobody asking you to pretend. Just figured it might help. Some quiet. Some forgiveness.”

A pause.

“Ain’t that simple,” the first man said. “Ain’t never been.”

You crept toward the edge of the stairwell, where the wood slats curved down just far enough to catch a glimpse. Two men stood near the back of the sanctuary, talking low.

The freckled one — Tommy, now — had one hand on the other man’s shoulder.

And that man—

That was him.

The stranger.

His face was set, unreadable. But there was grief in his stance, like it hung from his shoulders heavier than any coat.

“I know she’s safe,” he said. “But that don’t mean I’m at peace with what I did.”

Tommy sighed. Rubbed the back of his neck.

“Joel—”

That was the name.

Joel.

You tasted it like a secret.

His name settled in your mind like the first slow burn of dawn, when the sun presses against the edge of the earth, neither fully revealing nor hiding the night’s wounds.

୨♡୧

You made it back to the farm before the last “amen” ever left the chapel.

The pasture buzzed with cicadas, green and gold in the late morning hush. Dew still clung to the grass in the shadowed places, and Atticus snorted from behind the fence rail, stomping one heavy hoof against the dirt like he knew you'd left him too long.

You rubbed his nose for a long while in apology, forehead to muzzle.

“I saw someone,” you whispered, though you weren’t sure why. “I think he’s been scorched by something.”

The horse blinked at you, lashes thick with dust. You didn’t expect an answer, yet you spoke to him like always — slow, careful, like maybe the words could reach the part of him that remembered being something else. You spoke because maybe the horses had words inside them too, just locked up behind his teeth, long and yellowed like old piano keys.

Inside the house, the kettle was already set to boil, the day’s bread rising on the stove.

Your father sat by the window, Bible in hand, thumb pressed firm into the margin like he could hold the weight of it still. His beard had grayed more this past winter, and the lines around his mouth were carved deeper, like the edge of a carving knife had dragged across his face in sleep.

“Where’ve you been?”

His voice was even, but heavy — a stone dropped in still water. You took care not to flinch.

“Atticus was favoring that left hoof again,” you answered, peeling off your coat, “so I gave it a soak.”

He didn’t look up. Just nodded once, slow.

“Mm. You give him the cider poultice?”

You hesitated, not long, but just enough.

“Yes, sir.”

A lie, again. Small, but growing.

There were only a few sacred rules in your house, but they were carved deep: Obey. Pray. Keep close. The world was a thicket of sin and ruin, your papa always said — and a man couldn’t protect what he couldn’t see.

You didn’t argue. You just grew around those rules like a vine around a fencepost — twisting quietly, reaching skyward anyway.

The days here were always the same. Breakfast and scripture. Tending to the animals. Chores portioned out like penance. You swept the porch until your palms blistered. You washed linens until the skin on your knuckles cracked.

But there were moments — thin little slits in the curtains — where light came in.

When you read, for instance. You’d found a box of old books in the attic two winters ago, hidden behind a stack of broken candlesticks. Tattered spines and yellowed pages. As you read, you became familiar with the authors. There were a few names you knew by heart — Lee, Dickinson, and someone named Sylvia who made your chest hurt when she wrote about the color of the sky.

They felt like spells, those words. Like ways of seeing the world your father would never understand. You read them by oil lamp when the night pressed in too tight, the stories smudging your fingers like inked sin.

You started naming things you weren’t supposed to. Gave the animals names you found in your books that felt like blooming flowers in winter. And called the wind “her.”

You even sang, sometimes, out by the creek where the sound couldn’t carry. Not hymns — other things. Strange little songs you made up from dreams and verses and the memory of your mother’s voice, soft and half-remembered.

None of it was rebellion, not really.

It was just… living. Quietly. Softly. Like moss pushing up through stone.

But something had shifted.

Today, the world had shown you a man with eyes like dying leaves and a name like the first warm syllable of spring.

Joel.

You didn’t know what that meant yet, only that you’d remember the way he stood like a scar still learning how to heal.

And tonight, you would dream of fence posts, and firelight, and the deep, slow turning of the earth toward the sun.

secondary A/N: PLEASE someone tell me how to tag the other parts of this series on this post once they’re published!! I can’t seem to figure it out.

Dividers by: @uzmacchiato

[realchickenmanny]

Exactly a year ago on the 22nd of June, 2024 I thought "wow I should start asking people what their favorite word is", so I did!

Here's some data I've compiled after collecting 10465 favorite words!

If you don't know me, please tell me *your* favorite word before checking the data. that'd be cool (:

Before we begin, credits to @thespyglassofvision for doing literally all the work on actually compiling the data!

If your seeing this post in the future, here's a current up to date spreadsheet of the favorite words!

Of the 10465 favorite words I've gotten, 5991 (or 57.25%) are unique!

The average length of the favorite words are 26.67. If we exclude the longest favorite word, titin, whose full length word is 189,819 letters, the average length would be 8.54

The 25 most popular favorite words, with how many times they've been submitted:

Fuck 181

Defenestration 109

Petrichor 98

Defenestrate 76

Onomatopoeia 57

Serendipity 48

Shenanigans 43

Antidisestablishmentarianism 39

Effervescent 39

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious 39

Ethereal 37

Love 37

Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcanoconiosis 37

Perchance 34

Cunt 33

Melancholy 32

Meow 31

Indubitably 30

Silly 30

Yippee 30

The 20 longest words (excluding titin), with how many letters are in each word:

Taumata­whakatangihanga­koauau­o­tamatea­turi­pukaka­piki­maunga­horo­nuku­pokai­whenua­ki­tana­tahu 100

Hottentottenstottertrottelmutterattentäterlattengitterwetterkotterbeutelratte 77

Llanfairpwllgwyngyllgogerychwyrndrobwllllantysiliogogogoch 58

Pneumonoultramicroscopicsilicovolcaniconiosis 45

Verfowaldachro'Iley'Akwe'Ichrodekefowalchro 43

Hingusbokfusblumguscitruskongerbleeffairba 42

Квазиантихороводоводоведофилофобофагоманы 41

Kraftfahrzeug-Haftpflichtversicherung 37

Hippopotomonstrosesquippedaliophobia 36

Donaudampfschiffahrtskapitänskajüte 35

Hippopotomonstrosesquipedaliophobia 35

4893201383475939201870000999182395 34 (not sure if this really counts as a word?)

Supercalifragilisticexpialidocious 34

Konstantynopolitańczykowianeczka 32

MethylpropylphenylpropanoicAcid 31

Eellogofusciouhipoppokunurious 30

Floccinaucinihilipilification 29

Satanarchäolügenialkohöllisch 29

Antidisestablishmentarianism 28

Najneobhospodárovavateľnejší 28

Ordered list of the first letter in each word:

S 1277 P 915 C 902 A 717 D 637 F 623 B 563 E 552 M 549 L 392 T 387 G 340 H 325 I 325 R 299 O 266 W 256 V 218 N 190 K 165 Y 115 Q 93 U 90 J 74 Z 44 X 10 É 7 К 7 П 6 : 5 Б 4 Р 4 ب 4 Ż 3 Д 3 З 3 変 3 ️ 3 0 2 Н 2 С 2 Я 2 ا 2 ح 2 क 2 と 2 に 2 1 1 2 1 4 1 u 1 Æ 1 Č 1 Š 1 Ε 1 Μ 1 Ν 1 Χ 1 Ї 1 И 1 М 1 О 1 Ц 1 א 1 ח 1 ש 1 ش 1 م 1 ي 1 ब 1 व 1 श 1 แ 1 Ἀ 1 █ 1 か 1 ぎ 1 し 1 じ 1 ち 1 び 1 も 1 カ 1 ク 1 パ 1 モ 1 ヤ 1 作 1 刻 1 又 1 夢 1 大 1 好 1 心 1 恋 1 早 1 曖 1 木 1 松 1 林 1 炎 1 狐 1 猫 1 白 1 眩 1 着 1 米 1 花 1 雨 1 霞 1 귤 1 복 1 사 1 시 1 식 1 씨 1 흐 1

[astoldbyaja]

Unbowed - 1 (Sinners 2025)

Nysa Carrington and her husband, living in the Jim Crow south, move to a piece of land close to the Choctaw Indian Reservation In the Mississippi Delta and grow a familial bond with the Choctaw chief Chayton Black Elk and his people. When tragedy strikes Nysa's world, she must come to rely on the community around her for survival. Chayton, knowing the true evils that lie in the darkness of the world, takes on the responsibility of caring for her through these dark times. However through grief grows a passionate love and bond between them that cannot be broken by hateful nor supernatural forces.

Readers discretion: Since this is the Jim Crow south... there will be racism and racial slurs... and there will also be heavy sexual themes.

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Author's Notes

This is the first chapter of the next Sinners fic i'll be working on, but I am not posting more until The Shade Between Us is over. But i wanted to get this out in the universe XD Enjoy!

1932 – Mississippi Delta

Miles Carrington always had a bad heart. Sometimes coughs would have him a bit weak in the legs and other days they’d knock him off his feet and keep him in bed for days. But he was my husband, my lover, my friend. Our home was settled in Clarksdale, Mississippi. Miles is a carpenter. He builds many things and sells them to the colored people in town. We had moved from Arkansas to start a new life. Of course, hardly anyone would sell to coloreds, but we managed to find a small piece of land with a lake in the back. I’d say the only thing that unnerved me was that it was very close to the Choctaw Indian reservation. I’ve heard so many things about the reservation, that the tribes weren’t friendly to strangers.

It's bad enough people don’t like coloreds as it is. I was worried they’d try and run us from our home. Whenever I was sweeping the porch, I’d see some of them walking down the road, sometimes driving. They never said anything so that made me feel a bit better. When they looked our way, I never made eye contact. Miles was always the more positive one. Most of the stores we visited were owned by the natives. When we’d go to the small market areas, he’d happily introduce us and even make small talk with the folks. I was the shy one, never wanting to talk to anyone.

Through time, we managed to make a good impression on our neighbors. They would invite us to get togethers, and Miles would even make things for them like some dressers or shelves. In return they’d bring us vegetables and fruits that they grew on their land.

It was actually very nice getting to see them and talk to them.

One morning I was bringing a load of laundry to the lake bent on washing our clothes. As I drew near the lake, I could see a figure further down, more so the back of a man. He has shoulder length black hair, that’s all I could make out. He was obviously bathing in the water, singing or chanting. I didn’t want to bother him, but I couldn’t help but be curious of this man’s voice. I sat down on my knees and started my task at hand using my soap to wash the clothes. Many of the Choctaw use the lake. Miles figures it is their land and they could fish and swim in it as much as they pleased.

“Good morning, ma’am!” I jump a bit as I hear the deep voice of the man from the other end. He was facing me now. He had a rugged and firm appearance from what I could see along with a broad chest with some muscles on his arms.

“Good morning, sir.” I replied lightly.

“I’m Chayton Black Elk… you’re my neighbor’s wife.” he said. I wasn’t expecting him to want to converse with me. I nodded.

“Yes, I’m Nysa Carrington.” I replied politely as I washed the clothes.

“Nysa… never heard such a name.” he said. I only nodded.

“Yes, it means new beginning.” I said as I brought my focus back to my clothes. I see ripples in the water, and I gasped as he’s now standing closer, waist deep, in the water. He wasn’t too close, but it definitely made the air tighten in my lungs.

“That’s a beautiful name.” he said with a nod, hair slick back. His voice is calmer, more collected. I only nodded avoiding eye contact and keeping my eyes on my own clothes. It’s not really good manners to be all open and exposed in the chest next to a married man’s wife. People could start talking. Chayton catches my uneasiness and slowly backs away. “I’m sorry for bathing here unannounced. I was just finishing up.”

“It’s alright.” I said gently glancing at him.

“I’m the chief of the reservation your husband and you have visited. My people have really appreciated your husband’s furniture. The whites don’t do business with us when it comes to such things. Your husband is good at making them.” he said. I was a bit stunned at the man’s position.

“You’re the chief?” I asked. He gave a firm nod.

“Does that surprise you?” he asked. I glanced up at him and then back at the clothes.

“I thought chiefs were older men.” I said. He cracks a small smile.

“I’m thirty-six… some would say that’s pretty old.” he said. I kept washing my clothes and nodded.

“Yes, I guess so.” I replied glancing up at him then back at my clothes. He gives a nod and steps back in the water.

“Well Mrs. Carrington, it was nice to meet you. You enjoy your morning ma’am.” he said. I smiled politely and nodded.

“You as well Mr. Black Elk.” I said, and we both went about our business. I keep a mild watch of him to ensure he doesn’t quietly come back over like he did before. He then begins to get out of the water, and I catch a glimpse of his backside, and I immediately look away.

“Jesus.” I mutter.

Months passed and the heat rose in the daytime. Miles and I had decided to invite the Choctaws over for a little get together of music and food and swimming. I honestly didn’t expect many to come over, but they did. Miles’ always had a way about him, that just makes people trusting of him, liking his character. I had made what food I could. I had baked ham and turkey and numerous sides. Some of the Choctaw women came with food of their own sharing their culture with us. The elders spoke and smoked long pipes, and the young played with long sticks with a ball on the floor. I spoke with the men and women, and we talked about our hair and how we managed it in the heat. I had my curls flowing down my back in a long braid.

Everyone was having a good time. Miles was talking with Chayton and a few others. Most of the other black folks didn’t come around often even if I invited their wives for tear and biscuits. I wasn’t sure if they liked the Choctaw or were just wary of them. But it felt nice talking to the women here. I was coming out of the house with a tray of biscuits when Miles approached me, his brow sweating some.

“Honey, I’m gonna join some of the others in the lake for a swim, you know cool off a bit from this heat.” he said. I looked him over warily touching his chest.

“Miles are you sure, your heart?” I asked and he smiled warmly and placed his hand over my chest.

“I’ll be alright.” he said and kissed my lips. I smiled at the warmth of them and nodded.

“Okay.” I replied, and he smiled and took the plate of biscuits over to the table before moving to follow some of the other men to run toward the lake removing his shirt on the way. Our celebration was in the back so everyone could watch over everyone.

“Mrs. Carrington.” I turn to see Chayton approaching with a warm smile. I smile back and nod.

“Hello Mr. Black Elk.” I replied. He smiled and nodded.

“This is a lovely party you and your husband threw. Thank you for inviting us.” he said. I smiled and nodded.

“Well thank you for coming… to be honest, I didn’t think anyone would show.” I said. He tilted his head quizzically.

“Why do you say this?” he asked. I shrugged some.

“I don’t know, I guess I didn’t think anyone cared enough about us to stop by.” I said. He nodded slowly looking around at everyone having a good time. I did the same looking out to the water seeing people swimming and laughing and having a good time. I saw Miles swimming and he waves at me. I smile and wave back.

“Even though everyone sticks to their own kind most of the time, you and your husband have really been nice to talk to. Your husband talks to downright anyone he can when he’s on the reservation. At first many thought he was strange, but he’s just a genuine human being and you don’t see that around here.” he said I nodded I agreement.

“Not in the south.” I agreed gently. After a moment I noticed many different faces came from the water. Miles must have still be swimming, so I didn’t worry about it.

“Well just know you and your husband are always welcome on our reservation no invite needed.” Chayton said and I looked up at him with a smile.

“Well thank you Mr. Black Elk. That’s mighty nice of you.” I replied, and he his rugged smile still on his features.

“Please call me Chayton.” he said. I nodded.

“Only if you’ll call my Nysa.” I replied. He dipped his head some and nodded.

“Deal.” he said. I smiled and looked out toward the lake again noticing it looked very empty, except for something floating out on the surface. It was a black back just floating there. My heart sank and my eyes widened.

“Miles?” I asked, and Chayton looked out at the water seeing what I saw. “MILES!” I start to run toward the water. Chayton calls for some men and now many began to look toward the water. I hold up my dress as I get into the water.

“MILES!” I scream as I feel the weight of the water dragging me down. Some men who were near the water already, are commanded by Chayton in their language. Many men jump into the water toward the floating body. Oh no! Oh god no! My heart is pounding so hard in my chest as the men get to the body. I cried out in pain and panic as they swim back over. Many women are pulling their children back as the elders began to move toward the edge ready to help if possible. Chayton and many other young men are pulling my husband from the water, and they finally get him on land.

“Give him some room!” Someone yells. Chayton lies him on his back, and I see his eyes are closed.

“Miles, baby please!” I cry out touching his face as Chayton presses on his chest trying to get the water out. I place my mouth over his breathing into him trying to get him to open his eyes. “Miles, come on baby open your eyes!”

Chayton continues to press on him, and I continue to breathe into him but nothing works. Chayton with deep and saddened eyes, looks at me.

“He’s gone Nysa.” he said. I lean back shaking my head quickly.

“No no no… Miles!” I screamed and leaned back screaming louder in sheer shock. “NO!” I grabbed his shoulders screaming as I touched all on his shoulders.

“Oh, my love! Miles oh GOD NO!” I scream touching his face as his eyes do not open to look at me. “Oh my god! Oh my god! Please!” I bawled heavily as strong arms grab me and bring me into Chayton’s chest as I cry out hard, hitting at his back to let me go. But they were weak attempts as I bawl into his chest. His hand gently fists into the back of my head to cradle and whisper to me.

“No! AAAHH!” I screamed into him as my vision blurs heavily from my tears. I had never felt such happiness and joy snatched away from in a matter of minutes. Why God… why would you take my husband from me?

Author’s Notes

Definitely don’t listen to Eclipse from Avatar 2 because you will cry like I did as I wrote this chapter.

[non-binary-lil-star]

Okay motherfuckers LETS DO THIS bare with me

Notes: I tried to put fanfic length, a small summary and some trigger warnings, but there are still some things missing. I have other fics to add (i just scrolled through more than a year of ao3 history to find these mind you) so I'll be updating this. Unfortunately, I didnt find the fic i mentioned :( i swear i looked all over for it i don't know if I missed it or if it was deleted, if I find it I'll let you know

Anyway, this is a lot, I gathered all i could find so you could look over things and find what you like!

General trigger warnings: Most fics have some mention of neglect (especially the Tim drake joins de batfamily early ones) the fics that take place in recent Canon all shown some kind of canon typical violence. You should also watch out for mentions of verbal and physical abuse, torture and suicidal ideation

Have a good read! :D

Tim Drake kid fics - one shots

Buttheads don't get cuddles by There_lies_my_sanity

Really cute, mostly Jason centered, but Tim is just the tiniest cutest thing here. Jay deals with his complicated feelings due to Childhood Trauma at 10 but at least he had a little brother to hug.

Tim isn't a baby (6 is actually really old!) By loreoftheforgotten

Tims parents aren't home, but he really wants a hug!!! Sooo he goes to ask one for the one and only Dick Grayson!

This one is really really cute (I've re read it Gotham knows how many times) and it inspired many other fics such as Timmy the Explorer and a chapter in What Kids Can Be.

TW: Neglect

Timmy the Explorer by quotation_void

Really really cute, reads almost like a comic to me. I actually made some fanart for this one! Lmk if you like it and I'll send u the post! In this one Tim is going to Wayne manor in the rain because he wants a hug.

TW: Neglect

Holy security breach Batman! by destiny919

Kid Tim tries to find the Batcave

Tim Drake Joins the family early - multichapters

I'd place the world at your feet by Plantea

Tim loses his camera but finds a brother

TW: neglect

What kids can be by BallOfDepressedMoonlight

Civilian (no capes) au in which Tim meets Jason at a gala, they become friends, but Dick starts to notice there's something weird about this kid's living situation.

TW: Canon typical violence, physical and verbal abuse, neglect, abandonment, stabbing

Settle our Bones by motleyfam

Probably one of the most famous Tim Drake joins the batfamily early stories! This one is a collection starting with "5 Times Tim spends the night at Wayne Manor + 1 time he Comes Home". It's really good and i love the follow up one shots.

Temporary Arrangement... Until It's not by Undercover_fangirl

5 + 1 things but for Tim staying at Wayne manor.

One smart magpie by Marbles_and_sweetpeas _ 41k

Timmy detective! (Tries to solve mysteries and ends up finding a family)

TW: Neglect

General current canon Batfamily shenanigans

Is it ethical to give yourself an allergic reaction? By PhantomOfTheArchive

Kind of angsty not gonna lie, but the follow up story is really cute. Features all the batfamily plus Tim 'I have not thought this through' Drake. In which everyone is arguing and Tim has an Idea to get the family to cooperate. He never said it was a good idea.

TW: Yelling, allergic reaction

Blankets by PhantomOfTheArchive

Teeth rooting fluff with sleep deprived Tim, Jason, Dick and Bruce. Tim makes a blanket fort!

How to fix a stalemate by PhantomOfTheArchive

Hurt/comfort and Jason centered, this one kind of gets to me. Really good.

TW: poisoning, self depreciation

Suffocating on Dry Land by PhanthomOfTheArchive

Hurt/comfort with Tim angst sprinkles. Featuring mother hen Jason Todd, Tim 'You know what this is fine' Drake and Dick 'Bud you should NOT be this comfortable with someone who tried to kill you' Grayson. In this one Jason finds wet cat Tim soaked after a free dive on a Gotham river (yucky) and gets him to one of his safe houses.

Fledgling Wings Soar Under Red-Stained Skies by RiverOverHere

Really really cute! Jason had a plan to take over Gothams underworld, to reveal himself slowly and carefully. But when the joker kinapts the next Robin. Well, plan in the trash.

TW: Verbal and physical abuse, torture

Ya Dun Fucked Up by quotidian_void

Some dumbasses decide it's a good idea to kinap and torture the third Robin. Nightwing finds them. It was, in fact, not a good idea to kipnap and torture the third Robin

TW: Canon typical violence, torture, verbal and physical abuse and being stripped down which I count as sa

Working Alone Looks Different by MooseMink

The JLA meets the batkids. This one is sooo funny i really recommend it.

The Worst Kind of Crush by TimDrakeisMyPatronus

Probably one of the most angsty here. The concept is interesting, the writing is great and I think about it all the time but for the sake of my sanity I really don't plan on ever re reading it lol. In which Tim gets trapped under a building and activates his emergency beacon hoping someone _ anyone _ comes. No one does. He's alone for hours.

TW: Canon typical violence, multiple internal and external injuries, self depreciation

Unseen Kindness (It's Buried a Little Deep) By x_Idk_Man17_x

Damian centered fic

Truth by byrambles

Tim doesn't think he is loved 👍🏼 (he is)

One-shot- 2k

Sunday Morning by milkimae

Tim has a rough night and seeks solace in Wayne Manor.

2 chapters - 6k

TW: Verbal and physical abuse, neglect, choking

Puff The Magic Robin by alchemistsarego

Tim tries to save people without his armor. It goes wrong.

One-shot- 6k

TW: injury, near death experiences, past suicidal ideation and attempt, past depression, hospitalisation and anxiety, past child neglect

Truth Hurts by TimDrakeIsMyPatronus

Tim gets dosed with truth serum... He's not doing very okay.

2 chapters - 4k

TW: Depression, discussion of suicide, passive suicidal ideation

Looking for batfam fic recs

okay, so I'm not really massive in DC content HOWEVER I've always loved the Batfam content I come across along with edits of Dick n Jason.

I've also read the WFA webtoon.

any, I've been mindlessly reading batfam one shots and now craving some longer written stuff.

it can be here or ao3.

I'll take anything that's batfam focused. not bothered about ships.

I will say I do want more ShifterAu ( it doesn't have to be wolves) or Incbus!Jason Todd long fics cause I read a few of those as One shots and really enjoyed them.

I will take any one shot/short fic recs too if I haven't read em because I'm just CRAVING batfam stuff atm. idk why.

i don't think I have any squicks. it just gotta be batfam based. mainly with Dick, Jason, or Tim focused (this is what ive mainly read atm), maybe, but I'll take any of the rest too, honestly.

thank you in advance. :>

[kimmiessimmies]

Rainbow (1/31)

My dear Sadie,

Thank you for all your patience with me and understanding that phone calls are difficult for me right now. But I told you I’d write, so here I am.

My days here are very calm. I’ve discovered that I’m currently one of seven or eight people staying at this house. Not that I’ve spoken to any of them, because I need to be with my own thoughts and socialising is not what I need right now. But the house is a rather quiet place usually.

I have a therapy session every day. I really like my therapist. Her name is Sasha, and she’s great. I asked her if I could replace my actual mother with her. She said no. ;) But yeah, she’s incredible. We’ve been talking a lot about my past, and she is very good at making all those complicated things in my mind seem simpler. It’s like, I throw this big, knotted lump on the table, and she unties it. Or rather, shows me how to untie it. I really feel like she gets it.

She gave me a book to read, it’s called “Movielove is a Myth” and it’s great. It’s a fictional story about a girl who’s a lot like me. She’s always believed that being in love is the greatest thing and what we all should strive to be, but she finds out she doesn’t experience it that way. She does fall in love, but rarely and when she does, she has a lot of trouble facing it because with love comes the risk of pain, too. I recognise a lot of this and that helps me. Maybe you should read it. It really is very good. Did you know the Rainbow Alliance actually publishes books like these? I think it’s really awesome that they do.  

Aside from therapy and reading I spend my days making music, writing songs (and failing…), and going on walks. Appaloosa sparks happy childhood memories of when I stayed with my grandmother as a child. It’s a shame you have never gotten to know her.

I walked by her house the other day. It feels so empty right now and that made me sad. I thought of my grandmother and how she would have felt about all this, about me… I don’t know if I would ever have had the courage to tell her, though, and it’s all a moot point anyway because I can’t anymore…

But I digress. What I was trying to do is paint a bit of a picture of how my days here are spend, and that’s really about it: therapy, music, walks and eating by myself. Which I swear, is not as sad as it may sound. It’s actually quite peaceful. :)

I hope you’re doing well, my girl. I miss you tremendously and look forward to being allowed to have visitors so I can give you a hug.

Yours,

James.