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cryptwrites · 2 years

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Poisons

Hello! I'm gonna share how I go about writing poisons and the things I think are helpful to keep in mind. Now, I have never actually poisoned someone - shocker - but I have done extensive research on the topic, so I would say I know a decent amount about how to effectively poison someone. Disclaimer: This is for writing purposes only, don't poison people. Thanks.

Keep In Mind:

Poisoners need little to no physical strength although they do need a strong sense of self control & nerves of steel. Shooting or stabbing someone takes a mere moment of consideration and is frequently the result of a split second decision, while position requires dedication. Many poisons require a certain amount of time to work and the poisoner usually must administer several doses of poison in order to work. The poisoner also usually must be within close proximity to their victim and often will have to look them in the eye and engage with the person while the person slowly dies.

Exotic poisons can be more trouble than they’re worth. Importing exotic poisons leaves a trail for authorities to follow, and they require more research to correctly use.

Smart poisoners work with what they’ve got. The clever killer looks for drugs that are already in the victim’s medicine cabinet and that could be deadly. Read medical warning labels to get an idea of how to use them.

Poison can be used in ways that aren’t deadly. If the goal isn’t death, you can render someone dizzy or dopey, making a character vulnerable to a bad influence.

Common Poisons

Hemlock: Poison hemlock comes from a large fern-like plant that bears a dangerous resemblance to the carrot plant. It was readily available for treating muscle spasms, ulcers, and swelling, but in large doses will cause paralysis and ultimately respiratory failure.

Mandrake: It was used as a sedative, hallucinogen and aphrodisiac. Superstition mediaeval denizens believes when the vaguely human-shaped root was pulled out that plant gave a piercing shriek that would drive anyone to madness or death - hence the harry potter scene.

Arsenic: Arsenic comes from a metalloid and not a plant, unlike the others but it’s easily the most famous and is still used today. instead of being distilled from a plant, chunks of arsenic and dug up or mined. It was once used as a treatment for STDs , and also for pest control and blacksmiths, which was how many poisoners got access to it. It was popular in the Renaissance since it looked similar to malaria death, due to acute symptoms including stomach cramps, confusion, convulsions, vomiting and death. Slow poisoning looked more like a heart attack.

Nightshade: A single leaf or a few berries could cause hallucinations - a few more was a lethal dose. Mediaeval women used the juice of the berries to colour their cheeks, they would even put a few drops on their eyes to cause the pupils to dilate for a lovestruck look which is why Nightshade is also called ‘Belladonna’ or “Beautiful woman.” The symptoms include dilated pupils, sensitivity to light, blurred vision, tachycardia, loss of balance, staggering, headache, rash, flushing, severely dry mouth and throat, slurred speech, urinary retention, constipation, confusion, hallucinations, delirium and convulsions.

Aconite: This toxic plant, also called Monkshood or Wolfsbane, was used by indigenous tribes around the world as arrow poison. The root is the most potent for distillation. Marked symptoms may appear almost immediately, usually not later than one hour, and with large doses death is near instantaneous. The initial signs are gastrointestinal including nausea, and vomiting. This is followed by a sensation of burning, tingling, and numbness in the mouth and face, and of burning in the abdomen. In severe poisonings pronounced motor weakness occurs and sensations of tingling and numbness spread to the limbs. The plant should be handled with gloves, as the poison can seep into the skin.

If someones poisoning another:

The character should analyse the daily life of the target well before attempting to poison them. Note what sort of medicines they take, at what moments they are most vulnerable, how attentive they are to their surroundings, and so on.

Choose a poison that suits your needs. You need to be as discreet as possible and not arouse suspicion. Too dramatic and people will know something is up. Choose poisons that are easy to slip into meals/don't have to be administered constantly, or you could simply frame it as an overdose by using the target's own medicines.

Think of how you want to administer the poison. Some take effect through touch while some require being swallowed. Based on that, come up with a plan to poison your target.

Make sure everything corresponds with the plot and characters, and nothing becomes a plot hole. Don't have a typically nervous character be perfectly calm when thinking of poisoning. Don't poison someone just for the sake of it. Have everything tie back to the plot, your characters rarely should be poisonings someone just for the "cool" effect. Trust me, it doesn't actually have that effect and just comes off like lazy writing. Have your characters act in accordance with their personalities.

Research time periods and history when choosing poisons. Not all poisons were popular during the same time periods, and not all of them are native to the same geographical areas.

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covid-safer-hotties · 11 days

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Black Americans Are More Likely to Get Long COVID. These Clinical Trials Can Find a Cure - Published Sept 12, 2024

Millions of people worldwide, especially Black Americans, are experiencing long-term health effects after recovering from COVID-19, a condition known as Long COVID. While the initial stages of the pandemic saw significant progress in diagnosing and managing the virus itself, Long COVID remains a major public health challenge.

To address this growing concern, the National Institutes of Health (NIH) launched the Researching COVID to Enhance Recovery (RECOVER) Initiative. This initiative aims to understand, prevent, and ultimately treat Long COVID.

What is Long COVID? Long COVID, also known as post-acute sequelae of SARS-CoV-2 infection (PASC), is a condition that can develop in individuals who have recovered from COVID-19. It is characterized by a range of symptoms that persist for weeks or months after the initial infection. These symptoms can vary widely from person to person but commonly include fatigue, brain fog, shortness of breath, joint pain, chest pain, heart palpitations, and digestive problems.

The exact cause of Long COVID is still being investigated, but it is believed to be related to the body’s immune response to the virus. Some experts suggest the virus may damage organs or tissues, leading to long-term health problems. Others believe that the immune system may continue to attack the body even after the virus has been cleared, causing ongoing symptoms.

The severity and duration of Long COVID can vary greatly. Some people experience mild symptoms that resolve within a few weeks, while others suffer from severe symptoms that can significantly impact their daily lives.

Why are clinical trials for Long COVID important? There are currently no established treatments for Long COVID. Clinical trials are crucial for developing effective therapies. The RECOVER Initiative includes a program called RECOVER-CT, which is the largest national clinical trial network specifically designed to investigate treatments for Long COVID.

Why should Black Americans consider participating in Long COVID clinical trials? Studies suggest that Black Americans are disproportionately affected by Long COVID, experiencing a higher prevalence of symptoms compared to other races. Participating in clinical trials allows Black Americans to play a vital role in the development of treatments tailored to their specific needs.

What are RECOVER-CT trials studying? The RECOVER-CT program is exploring a wide range of interventions for Long COVID, including medications, rehabilitation strategies, and alternative therapies. These interventions target various Long COVID symptoms, such as fatigue, muscle aches, cognitive dysfunction, and sleep problems.

Early success and looking forward The RECOVER-CT program has already achieved significant milestones. It has initiated five clinical trial platforms, encompassing eight trials and testing thirteen interventions across more than 100 sites nationwide. The program’s success is further exemplified by the rapid enrollment of the first trial within nine months and low participant drop-out rates.

Trial's official website: www.rti.org/impact/long-covid-clinical-trials

#mask up #pandemic #covid #covid 19 #wear a mask #coronavirus #public health #sars cov 2 #still coviding #wear a respirator #long covid #covid is not over #covid conscious #covid is airborne

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f1letters · 2 years

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sweet nothing | sv5

"all that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothing"

summary: after years of battling infertility, seb was still by her side. he didn't need anything else but her... but maybe their lives were about to get a little more crowded

warning: a little bit sad at times but overall fluff, mentions of endometriosis, infertility, inability to conceive, fertility treatments and pregnancy, mentions of a person attacking the reader for not continuing with treatments to have children, mentions of anxiety and insecurity

pairing: sebastian vettel x reader

word count: 3.0k

note: everything in bold are song references and in italic are thoughts, which includes memories from the past. I would also like to point out that I am not a doctor nor do I have professional knowledge on the subject, having relied on personal experience and the additional research I did on the subject. I tried my best not to be too focused on the medicinal terms so I wouldn't give the wrong information.

german words used: liebling = darling; engel = angel; schatz = sweetheart

no better week to post this story than the week we say goodbye to Seb. nobody talk to me during race weekend, because I'll be busy crying my heart out. 😭 it's so sad to see Seb leave but above all, I hope he is the happiest person in the world with his family and that he knows that he is forever a legend of this sport. danke Seb, you will forever be my number 1 💘

masterlist

I spy with my little tired eye

Tiny as a firefly

A pebble that we picked up last July

Down deep inside your pocket

We almost forgot it

Does it ever miss Wicklow sometimes?

"You are 18 weeks pregnant, Mrs Vettel." The obstetrician told her.

"That's not possible," Y/N replied, not being able to believe the words she was hearing. The only sound she could hear at that moment was her own heart pounding loudly in her ears like heavy rain hitting the window glass during a storm. "Please check again. There must be an error in the ultrasound machine, it has to be."

The doctor turned the screen so the woman could see the image displayed. Y/N found herself completely paralyzed by the shock it caused her. It can't be, she still didn't believe it.

But it is true, she understood that when she read her information at the top of the monitor. It was there: 'Y/N Vettel', along with her age, her gender and the correct date of that miraculous day.

"Are you sure you didn't notice any symptoms?" The professional asked, curious. "Your pregnancy is already a little over four months. You've certainly felt something, or noticed something different in your body."

The truth is that she had noticed a thousand differences in herself over the last few years, but, convinced by the doctors that she was not capable of having a baby and already resigned that it was not a part of her plans, she chose to ignore them until she had no choice but to come to the doctor to confirm.

It all started when her period missed its usual date, something she quickly attributed to the stress, the work, and the constant travels she had to make to support her husband around the world.

This was followed by the sudden tiredness and fatigue she felt and her abrupt mood swings (immediately noticed by Sebastian, who was the one suffering the most because of them). But once again, work and travel became the explanations constantly given.

When she was in Japan about two months prior, that's when nausea started but, I mean, it was Japan and the woman didn't deprive herself at all from eating and enjoying all the exotic foods of that magical country, which logically had caused some sort of food poisoning, she thought.

All of these alterations had plausible answers, and none of them sounded out of the ordinary until Y/N started noticing a small bump in her stomach, though still nothing major.

At first, she wondered if it was due to her sloppiness in her exercise routine. But when she found herself looking at her reflection in the mirror and starting to create expectations about a hypothetical baby, the driver's wife decided that the best thing would be to step back from dreamland and go to the doctor.

Not because she expected to hear that her biggest dream had finally come true, but rather to keep her from imagining a life that would never be possible, or so she thought.

When looking at her baby for the first time, tears began to form in her eyes. He was so small, tiny as a firefly, but so real. His little feet, his delicate hands, his loving face. She couldn't believe that love of such a dimension could instantly consume her, warm her soul, and fill her with hope and dreams long forgotten.

"It's a boy, isn't it?" she asked, sure the answer would be yes. Inexplicably perhaps, as soon as she looked at him, all she could see was Sebastian.

Oh my god, how could I, she panicked. Y/N was so confident that this trip to the doctor would be nothing and now all she could think about was how she had taken away her husband's experience of being able to find out about the pregnancy on her side.

"Yes, it's a little boy." The obstetrics confirmed after a few minutes, smiling at the pregnant woman lying on the bed. "How did you know?"

"I don't know, it was just a feeling." Y/N replied. "And... And is everything alright with him?"

"Don't worry, my dear." The doctor placed her hand over the other woman's. "He is perfect and seems to be completely out of harm's way. Now you just have to take care of yourselves and enjoy the process."

They said the end is comin'

Everyone’s up to somethin'

I find myself runnin' home to your sweet nothings

Outside, they’re push and shovin'

You're in the kitchen hummin'

All that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothin'

After tucking two copies of the ultrasound carefully into the bottom of her suitcase, the woman left the clinic on a mission: running home to her lover's sweet nothings.

A few meters ahead, she managed to signal for a taxi to stop and thus began her journey home. The happiness she felt radiated everywhere as she leaned the top of her head against the car window and recalled all the stormy moments that had brought her here, to the happiest day of her life.

"Seb, I can't see. You do it." The young woman told her husband, covering her eyes, afraid to know the test result in front of them.

"Okay, liebling. Relax." He said, placing his hands on her shoulders in an attempt to control his wife's stress. "Regardless of the outcome, we'll deal with it, together." He placed a soft kiss on the top of her hair.

They had been trying to have a baby for a few months now, without success, and she especially was starting to feel the pressure. Seb, the more peaceful and patient of the two, did what he could to reassure her that they would be okay, come what may, but Y/N was starting to think something was wrong with her.

The driver took the white stick and turned it over, immediately noticing the two pink stripes. "Engel..." His voice whispered, barely audible. "You- We- We are having a baby."

In disbelief, she took his hand to confirm it with her own eyes. "Oh my god, we made it. We're having a baby." The two embraced and the world around them disappeared as the newlyweds wept with happiness.

The couple immediately called their parents and close family, excited to share the good news with everyone. Everyone knew how much this child was wanted and how much they tried to make it a reality.

They were so happy for a few days.

Two days later, the two went to the clinic to confirm that all was well with their future son or daughter. The process was very normal at first. They filled out the proper paperwork and answered the typical necessary questions. She then lay in bed while the doctor put the gel on her stomach and pressed the ultrasound probe into her belly, expecting to see their baby on the monitor.

They were fairly calm, until the obstetrician left the room without warning, returning minutes later with an older man, clearly a more experienced doctor, to help with the consultation.

Y/N and Seb looked at each other, both fearing the worst. But neither of them expected the words the doctor said to them as they all sat around his secretary.

"I'm afraid the positive test Mrs Vettel took a few days ago was a false positive." The man revealed.

On the way home

I wrote a poem

You say, "What a mind"

This happens all the time

Ooh, ooh

On her way home, the anticipation of telling her husband about their miracle grew as Y/N approached her destination.

As she got out of the taxi after paying the nice gentleman who drove her, the woman stopped to look around the neighbourhood. God, how perfect it was to raise a child there, she thought, as soon as her eyes fell on the image of a father and his little son playing football.

She could picture Seb and their baby boy a few years from then right there, kicking the ball around, and that would more than compensate for all the hardships they'd been through.

Since the day she was confronted with her endometriosis and for the next three years, Sebastian and his wife spent days on end with doctors and specialists, testing natural methods and different medications, and reading books on the subject.

A thousand different diagnoses, a thousand treatment options, and a thousand advice guides from people who had gone through the same thing.

All this led to discouragement and exhaustion for both of them.

"Sebastian, I don't think this will work..." She admitted, afraid of upsetting him. "We've tried everything."

"Liebling..." The driver called out to her, pain notable in his voice. "If it doesn't work out, we can always build our family in another way. We have fostering, surrogacy, adoption..."

"I'm tired of this, Seb." She confessed, for the first time, exhausted from the whole process and with tears forming in the corners of her eyes. "I'm tired of trying."

'Cause they said the end is comin'

Everyone's up to somethin’

I find myself runnin’ home to your sweet nothings

Outside, they're push and shovin’

You're in the kitchen hummin'

All that you ever wanted from me was nothin'

Y/N put her key in the lock and turned it, opening the door to the cosy blue house where they lived.

As soon as she entered her home, the young woman immediately smelled the magnificent scent of her favourite dish in the air, following it to the kitchen.

And there he was.

In the kitchen humming, swaying his hips gently to the music that played softly beside him as he prepared dinner.

She couldn't pass up that moment to stop and appreciate the love of her life.

Although he was a star of the Formula 1 world, had four world championships under his belt and was an idol to thousands of people around the world, Sebastian was his best version like this: at home, with his small acts of love, so simple and humble.

Without realizing it, Y/N let out a sob, just as she started to cry. She wept with joy, with gratitude, with love. He was without a doubt her best friend and she couldn't have chosen anyone better to be by her side than the German.

"Engel, what's the matter?" Seb asked, turning quickly to her and approaching her, as soon as he heard her cry. "What happened? Is something wrong?"

Industry disruptors and soul deconstructors

And smooth-talking hucksters out glad-handing each other

And the voices that implore, "You should be doing more"

To you, I can admit that I’m just too soft for all of it

"What do you mean you're going to stop treatments?" Y/N's mother questioned, with a scorned face. "You should be doing more, not giving up, for God's sake."

In fact, the relationship between Y/N and her mother had never been easy or healthy, but still, it hurt her to hear such judgment coming from someone who was supposed to love and support her unconditionally.

"Mum, that was our decision. It doesn't matter what you think is right or what you think is best." Y/N declared, trying to keep herself calm.

"That's what you say now." The older lady spoke up, her muscles tense with anger and not caring in the least about her daughter's feelings. "Not only are you depriving me of having grandchildren, but you are also preventing your own husband from having his own children. By choice. It won't take long to find someone else to give them to him. You'll see."

It won't take long to find someone else to give them to him.

You'll see.

Those terrible words were chanting in the poor girl's head, like a scratched record stuck in the same song.

It was safe to say that that conversation between mother and daughter had more consequences than expected from a simple breakfast. Y/N's mood was ruined for the rest of her day.

After returning home to her husband, the woman occasionally excused herself to the bathroom during the day in an attempt to hide the tears that threatened to fall.

However, Seb knew her better than the back of his hand. As soon as he looked at her walking through the door, he knew something was wrong, but he tried to give her space so she felt comfortable opening up to him about what was going on.

When the driver realized that he had no other option but to intervene, he entered the bathroom without warning, coming face to face with the image of his wife sitting on the toilet, crying as she hid in between her hands.

"Schatz, please talk to me." Seb pleaded, running his hand carefully over her hair as he lowered himself to her level.

"You're going to leave me, that's what's wrong." She confessed, letting her voice rise in volume. "All because I'm a complete failure as a woman and as a wife. I've tried, I've tried everything. But I can't give you the family you want, or the children you deserve."

"What are you talking about?" He asked, more confused than ever by his wife's sudden insecurity.

"You deserve so much better than me, Seb..." Y/N looked right into his eyes, trying to apologize for something she had no control over. "To you I can admit that I'm just too soft for all this. I can't live with the guilt of ruining your dreams anymore."

"Liebling, stop. Look at me." He took her hands and placed them on top of his own cheeks, making her maintain eye contact between them. "You are more than enough. I would give up everything for you. I don't need children, championships, money or fame." He continued, leaning his head against her thighs.

"All that I ever wanted from you was nothing. You are literally the only thing I need in this world to be happy."

They said the end is comin'

Everyone's up to somethin'

I find myself runnin' home to your sweet nothings

Outside, they're push and shovin'

You're in the kitchen hummin'

All that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothin'

Y/N grabbed the collar of the army green shirt her husband was wearing and pulled him to her, letting her lips cover his.

She poured all of her feelings into that kiss, quickly reciprocated with the same intensity by Seb as soon as he got over the shock of her unexpected movement.

Her tears continued to stream down her face, and although the German could taste them in his mouth, he knew that, no matter what was going on with Y/N, that demonstration of love between them was exactly what she needed at that time.

As soon as their now swollen lips parted ways, Sebastian broke the silence. "As much as I love every time you kiss me like that, I'm getting worried, engel. Did something happen? Where were you?"

"Oh sweetheart, something happened, yes, and you'll never believe what I have to tell you." Her smile appeared on her face again, so bright and cheerful, that her partner felt the corners of his mouth mirror the movement of her lips.

They said the end is comin'

Everyone's up to somethin'

I find myself runnin' home to your sweet nothings

Outside, they're push and shovin'

You're in the kitchen hummin'

"I'm honestly so lost, schatz." The man laughed, shaking his head. "But I can assume by your face that it's a good thing, I think?"

She laughed along with him, placing a sweet kiss on his cheek as she turned to her purse. Her hand reached for the rectangular image hidden at the bottom of the bag.

Seb held out his hand, expecting her to put the mysterious object on top of it.

His eyes were deceiving him. It can't be, his thoughts racing.

"Are- Are you- Is this yours?" He stuttered nervously.

Y/N nodded her head and wrapped the blond man around the waist. "We're going to have a baby, my love. It finally happened."

"But you- We- The treatments stopped-" He couldn't even form a complete sentence, which made his partner giggle like a little kid.

"Looks like he was just waiting for the right moment to show up." She leaned her cheek against her best friend's chest as he placed his chin on the top of her head.

"He? Is it a boy?" His voice faltered for a moment, unable to contain his emotion.

"Oops, surprise?" He felt her chest rise and fall against his as Y/N chuckled softly.

"I couldn't be happier, liebling." Sebastian looked at her, full on crying, with his hands over his wife's cheeks. "Just having you by my side makes me the happiest man in the world."

"I can't wait to meet our baby. I bet he's going to be your twin." She laughed, returning to her soulmate's warm embrace. "Thank you, Seb."

"Thanks for what?"

"Thank you for wanting nothing from me except for me."

"I love you more than anything, you and our little one." He placed his hand on her stomach for the first time, feeling the small bump, much to his shock.

"And I love you, Vettel." She replied, feeling a single tear run down her face.

"Michael won't believe me when I tell him this."

All that you ever wanted from me was sweet nothin'

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(taglist continues in the comments)

thank you to everyone that asked to be tagged! please let me know if you want to be added to the next stories! 💌

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woso-fan13 · 1 year

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Sicktember 2023: 15 (USWNT)

Sick in an Inconvenient Place

Your career was at an all time high. You would say it was peaking, but it seemed to get better everyday. You had millions of followers on social media, you were a brand ambassador for countless companies, you were constantly starting for the national team, you were on a freaking Wheaties box. To top all of that off, you weren’t old enough to legally drink or rent a car.

Your days were stressful, to say the least, but that was to be expected. You would wake up before the sun rose to have time to run and get a few hours of unofficial practice before you had to go to the stadium for actual practice. You would then train with the team, recover, and then do assorted media/brand commitments in the late afternoon. After that, it was time for a quick dinner before a final run for the night. Then a shower, pajamas on, and into bed where you would update social media and respond to any messages. A few hours of sleep and you were up the next morning to do it again.

It was exhausting, but it was necessary. If you wanted to be the best, it was necessary. At this place in your career, there’s no time to take a break.

So you continued. Days turned into weeks, weeks turned into months, and your sacrifices became worth it as you could see your career growing. You were unstoppable.

—-

You were not unstoppable, you soon found out. You didn’t wake up at your usual time, you must have been exhausted the night before and forgot to set an alarm. Despite the extra hours of sleep, you felt a bone-deep tiredness unlike anything you had felt before.

Every muscle in your body hurts. As you moved to grab your phone off your nightstand, you were barely able to lift it. Your arm was shaking with the effort it took.

You tried to power through these changes, forcing yourself out of bed and into the bathroom. You ignored the fact that your pee could have easily passed as tea, but the feeling in your chest made you stop. It felt like your heart was fluttering.

You knew not to take any problems with your heart lightly, so you called your doctor’s office to try and schedule an appointment for that day. The very lovely nurse on the phone had informed you that there were no appointments available until the week after next before she asked you what your current symptoms were. As you listed them off, you heard the line go quiet for a few moments.

Then, she was telling you to get to the emergency room.

—-

As soon as you mentioned the problem with your heart, you were immediately seen. Once they ruled out a heart attack, they calmed down, but continued to leave you hooked up to a monitor as they completed various tests. You allowed your eyes to close as you waited for results.

You awoke to someone standing in front of your face with a packet of papers and a pen. You listened as she rushed through an explanation of your condition- rhabdomyolysis, something you would have to research later. You weren’t fully paying attention until you saw her pass over a stack of consent forms.

She walked through them with you, explaining everything. With each new form, you could feel panic rising. The first form was for admission to the hospital- not ideal, but okay. The second form was for admission to the intensive care unit. At this, your eyes shot up.

You listened to an explanation on how your electrolyte levels were so unstable that you were at extremely high risk for cardiac irregularities and cardiac arrest, so you needed to be closely monitored. You were so focused on this that you didn’t notice as she continued talking about liver and kidney damage.

The next few hours passed in a blur as you were transported to a private room in the ICU. Seemingly, your career successes caused you to get labeled as a vip, meaning you bypassed some of the rules. Normally, you would protest any special treatment, but you felt like you deserved nicer blankets if you would be staying in the hospital.

You called your parents, sure that they would be made aware of it soon enough. They were concerned, but you reassured them that you were okay. You made it a point not to tell any of your teammates, knowing that they would freak out.

By the time the sun went down, you were so exhausted that you fell asleep. You slept through the night, unaware of the constant medication adjustments and lab tests.

—-

You woke up the next morning to the entire united states’s women’s national team crowded into the room. Several people were crammed into couches, asleep. Others had pulled chairs up around your bed, some of whom remained awake. They noticed your eyes opening.

It was silent as you woke up, a competition to see who would speak first. Eventually, you broke, speaking a quiet,

“Sorry.”

You were quickly stopped from apologizing and reassured that nobody was mad at you. What followed was an hour-long lecture about setting limits and not pushing yourself too far.

Thankfully, the lecture was stopped when the door opened. A familiar head peaks in, a look of relief crossing their face. She pushes fully into the room, walking over to wrap you in a hug.

“Oh, Y/N/N, I’m so glad you’re okay.”

“Me too, Mally. Are you doing alright?”

“Me?” she responds, sounding shocked, “you’re in an intensive care unit of a hospital. And you’re asking about me?”

You just shrug, a small smile on your face, “I really missed you.”

She leans down to pull you into another hug, squeezing tightly. You returned the hug similarly.

She pulls back, looking around the room. As you do the same, you realize that there are no empty chairs left. Painfully, you scoot to one half of the bed, motioning for her to join you.

“I don’t think that’s allowed,” she says, shaking her head.

“It’s fine, what are they going to do?” you respond, “they’re not going to kick me out to die on the street.”

Mal rolls her eyes before climbing in next to you. She wraps her arm around you, pulling you to rest against her. Your body relaxes, slumping against her.

It’s silent in the room for a few minutes before Mal leans over to grab the bag she left on the side table. She rummages through it for just a second before pulling out a worn book. Looking at it, you recognize it as the one she had read last camp and had been begging you to read.

She allows you to settle again, as you had been slightly displaced by her movement. Once both of you are comfortable, she opens to the first chapter. She begins reading- loud enough for the people in the room to hear, but quiet enough to be soothing.

You allow yourself to be transported out of the hospital bed and into the fictional world, joining the characters as Mal describes them.

#womens soccer #uswnt woso #uswnt x reader #uswnt players #woso imagines #reader insert #woso x reader #uswnt imagine #woso imagine #woso #uswnt fanfic #uswnt imagines #uswntsoccer #uswnt reader

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babyjakes · 11 months

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forever and a day | 54. you didn't.

〈 disclaimer: this blog posts content not suitable for individuals under the age of 18. minors are strictly prohibited from viewing, sharing, or interacting with this blog. for more information on this blog's commitment to protecting minors, read our full statement here. 〉

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summary | a story in which america’s favorite captain gives a new life and family to a five-year-old girl who has suffered well beyond her years at the hands of hydra.

characters | dad!steve rogers, girl/willa rogers (original character)

warnings | AU similar enough to OU to include spoilers to many Marvel movies (Age of Ultron and beyond). action and fight scenes with violence and killing. injuries/mild gore. mature themes related to and semi-graphic depictions of child abuse/neglect, past CSA and CSM, and their aftermath (emaciation, wounds, scarring, etc). medical abuse (including sterilization) and experimentation. ptsd/trauma symptoms in a child (developmental discrepancies, de-humanized behavior, detachment, extreme fears). medical treatment of CSM and other aftermath of abuse.trauma-informed therapeutic treatment of ECT. minor mentions of disordered eating. themes relating to abuse of power/authority and immoral interrogation tactics including SA (with brief depictions.) evil!Tony Stark.

[Steve]

If the night at Bucky's had been an isolated incident, I wouldn't have thought much about it. Unfortunately, in the days that have followed, things have only seemed to get more and more difficult for Willa.

It started the following morning, when I woke up around 5:00am to find the little girl in the bed next to me, bawling her eyes out. I had quickly switched on the bedside lamp, checking her over to see what was the matter, and I found her to be in the grips of a seemingly hellish night terror. She had no mind channel open, no crimson glow, so there was no way for me to know what she was dreaming of. Immediately, I had gathered her in my arms, rocking and soothing her as best I could while simultaneously hoping to rouse her from her torturous sleep. But it was no use; she was far too deep in the nightmare to break free. She flailed and sobbed and sputtered incoherently for hours, and all I could do was hold her and watch. By the time 7:00am rolled around, she finally woke up, and at that point she was inconsolable.

I couldn't get anything out of her that entire morning. She had fought her way out of my arms and crawled deep under my blankets, and I simply had no heart to remove her. I tried coaxing her out with the promise of cuddles, breakfast, and even her favorite movie, but nothing worked. Eventually, I decided to leave her alone and let her determine when she felt safe to come out, but she ended up staying there for most of the day. When she did finally emerge, she was a puddle of tears, her eyes begging for comfort and reassurance. But at the same time, she wouldn't let me come anywhere near her. When bedtime came around again, I offered to let her sleep with me in my room for another night, and she surprised me greatly by agreeing to it.

Through the night, she had another horrific nightmare, one so terrifying that it sent her jumping out of the bed in fear when she awoke. As soon as she saw me waiting for her with the lamp on, a deeply concerned expression drawn on my face, she grew so afraid of being punished that she began hyperventilating, eventually passing out from her compromised airflow. In the agonizing process of her panic attack, she wet herself again, and it was at that point that I decided I needed to speak with Jenny.

"Did anything happen in the days leading up to her shift in behavior that might've been cause for such a regression?" the mild young lady asks as she sits across from me in the living room. Resting back against the soft cushions of the sofa, I pick apart the past week in my mind, ultimately unable to identify anything.

"No," I sigh with a shake of my head. "There were small incidents here and there, but that's always the way it's been with her. Nothing major happened, at least, not that I can think of." It's now later in the morning, and Jenny and I are wrapping up a last-minute session I requested while Willa plays in her room. The doctor started off speaking with the child herself, but after half an hour or so of not getting much response at all, she decided to come out and work with me instead.

"I see," Jenny notes, scribbling something down on her legal pad. Closing up her pen, she brings her eyes up to meet mine, a familiar sense of warmth and patience lingering in her gaze. "Steve, with everything that Willa's gone through, her road to recovery isn't going to be as smooth as any of us would like it to be." I nod, not sure where the doctor could be going with a statement like that. "And even though things seem like they're getting worse with her, this is actually a pattern that's seen quite frequently with survivors of abuse and trauma who've recently escaped. Willa's body and mind were suppressing a lot of emotions, a lot of fear during her captivity, and even at the tower due to the things Tony did; her system couldn't handle addressing these feelings, so it shut them out. Now that she's in a truly safe place, with a safe person who only loves her and takes care of her, those things are beginning to show themselves because it's safe for them to." A wave of relief washes over me as the woman finishes her explanation, and I let out a deep hum.

"So this... is normal?" I ask. She nods.

"It's a difficult part of the process, since it might seem to both of you like things are getting worse when they should be getting better, but it's really just a sign that her body and mind are ready to start doing some deeper repair."

"I see. That's..." my voice trails off as I bring a hand up to brush through my hair. "That's so good to hear," I finish honestly. "I was really worried that I had done something wrong, or was messing up in some way."

"I don't think you need to worry about that, Steve, not at all. You're doing a phenomenal job with Willa. She just adores you." A faint smile crosses my face as I think of the little girl, and how much love and care I hold for her in my heart as well. "As far as dealing with her new or returning behavior, I'd recommend allowing her to get it out, as much as you possibly can. A big part of her might just need to respond in the way her body originally wanted to. She might need to go through the act of being scared or crying or getting sick, since those were all responses that were made impossible for her up until now. In regards to the increased accidents, it's a very common indicator of sexual trauma in children. I know it's frustrating, but try to be as patient with her about it as you can."

"No, no- it's not even frustrating," I assure her quickly, meaning the words with all my heart. "Really, it's not. It's not a hassle when it happens, not at all; it just makes me so worried."

"I know it's alarming to see her regressing in that sense, but it's totally normal and shouldn't pose an issue permanently as long as she remains in a safe environment where she isn't violated sexually. We're just meeting her where she's at, if that makes sense, and where she's at might go forward or backward for a while before we really start making linear progress. I know you know this already, but Willa is in many ways somewhat younger than five still, at least internally. And that's okay. We just have to let her exist at whatever developmental age she's at."

"And you think- you're sure it's okay? That I'm kind of, well- I don't know, kind of 'babying' her, as Tony would say?" I ask, wanting to be sure the doctor still approves of my controversial approach. Jenny smiles, allowing me to relax even more with relief.

"Yes, that's completely acceptable. Actually, it's probably very therapeutic for her system to be allowed to have those critical early childhood experiences that she was deprived of for so long. Whatever helps her feel safe and secure, even if it's meant for younger kids, is completely fine."

"Good," I nod, feeling slightly more sure about myself as a parent from all of Jenny's encouragement. "I'm sorry she wasn't up to working with you today," I apologize again, "I told her you were coming and asked her to do her best to be open and honest, but... I don't know. At the same time, I don't have much heart to push her."

"It's completely fine," Jenny reassures me once more, shaking her head at my persistent apologizing. "Therapy isn't ever something that should be forced upon a child. She'll talk when she's ready." Glancing down at her notepad, she offers, "I was wondering, though, if maybe the three of us could wrap up the session together? I believe Willa's still playing by herself in her room, and a lot of times children can be demonstrative of what they're thinking or feeling through the ways that they play. Maybe we could sit in with her for a little bit, if you don't mind?"

"I don't mind at all," I tell her, earning a smile as she rises to her feet.

"Alright, then," she says with a nod. "I'll let you lead the way."

Leading the woman back through the house, I stop just outside the child's half-open door, knocking a few times against the sturdy wood before pulling it the rest of the way open. Willa sits on the floor beside her bed, a few toys scattered around her as she holds a small wooden doll in her hands. Her big green eyes meet mine warily, and my heart sinks as she begins to tremble. "Hey sweetheart," I greet gently. For a moment, I remember that just a few days ago, she would beam every time I entered the room. Realizing that we're back to such a state of fear and uncertainty, a tinge of disappointment builds up inside of me. But then, I remember the doctor's words, and I'm able to remind myself that Willa's behavior is actually probably a good sign, in some weird way. "Things are starting to show themselves because it's safe for them to."

"Your daddy and I were wondering if we could sit and play with you for a little bit," the young lady's soothing voice overlaps her previous words running through my head. A look of skepticism forms on the little girl's face as she glances between the two of us, but thankfully after a few more moments, she nods. "Wonderful," Jenny says with a smile, and we enter in, both sitting a few feet back to give the child some space.

"What're you playing, Willa-bug?" I ask in a gentle tone, now able to get a better look at the toys she's taken out of her boxes. She has a bathtub and a sandbox from a dollhouse set, as well as Captain America and Ironman figurines, and the little brown-haired doll she's holding in her hand. The clothes are half torn off the doll, the hair messed and tangled. Big, frightened eyes look from the doll to me, and then back. "Who've you got there?"

"Willa," she says simply, holding up the doll that seems to represent herself. I nod.

"Is Willa getting dressed?" Jenny asks politely.

Swallowing hard, Willa shakes her head. "Off," she mumbles, removing the toy's purple dress and placing it on the floor. She then removes the doll's underwear as well, leaving it completely naked. Next, she reaches over and picks up the sandbox, opening up the cover. Almost urgently, she begins to dig, not stopping until she's created a little hole in the center. Then, she takes the Willa doll, placing it in the center of the hole. A lump forms in my throat as she buries the tiny pair of underpants with it, not paying any mind to the dress.

"Oh, you're... is Willa playing in the sand?" I ask, trying to understand the child's actions. Not giving a response, Willa simply continues with her scene, picking up the Ironman action figure and extending its arm. Clumsily, she begins using the plastic hand of the figurine to begin shuffling sand back over the doll that represents herself. "Willa, sweetie, what- what is Ironman doing?" I question carefully.

Once the wooden doll and her underwear have disappeared completely beneath the sand, Willa extends the other arm of the superhero's body, making them now both stick out straight. With a concerning amount of force, she begins jabbing the hands into the sand, uncomfortable sounds of plastic and wood colliding as the man apparently attacks the girl. Glancing over at Jenny, I see that her brow is furrowed in concentration. All I can hope is that she's understanding what Willa's actions mean, because to be completely honest, I have no idea what to make of any of it.

After several more moments of the violent motions, Willa finally stops, putting Ironman's arms back down and dropping him to the floor. Sifting through the sand, Willa pulls out the wooden doll, shaking her off slightly before finding her purple dress and redressing her. Turning back to the sandbox for a moment, she uses a single finger to re-bury the underpants, causing my brain to ache with questions and concerns. When satisfied with the way the piece of clothing is hidden, Willa picks up the bathtub, once again removing the doll's dress before placing her in the tub, coming to what seems to be a stopping point.

"Sweetheart?" I ask quietly, unable to even form my thoughts into a question.

"Can you tell us what you're doing, Willa?" Jenny fills in for me. "Willa's taking a bath now?" The little girl nods. "What about Daddy? He's with you when you take baths, right?" she continues, picking up Captain America off the floor and offering it to the child. To my surprise, Willa shakes her head, pushing the doll away. Jenny lets her. "No help from Daddy? Okay, that's okay, hun," the doctor says quickly, wanting to avoid upsetting the chidl.

"What was... what happened in the sandbox, honey?" I ask, not sure if I should be asking so many questions but ultimately too worried to refrain from doing so. Willa flinches slightly at my question, her bottom lip quivering as she gives me nothing but silence in return. "Okay, it's okay, sweetheart," I coo soothingly, not wanting to push the subject too hard, "that's okay, you don't have to tell us."

"How about you keep playing, sweetie," Jenny suggests, "it's okay. You said Willa was in the bath?" The small girl nods, looking back down at her toys before pulling the doll out of the tub, redressing her in her purple gown. Then, the child surprises both me and the doctor by repeating the same exact process all over again, starting with digging out the underpants in the sandbox, putting them back on the doll, and then completely undressing it.

My brow creases in perplexion as I watch Willa 'play,' her motions almost seeming like a routine or ritual that her body knows by heart. She repeats the entire scene once, then twice, and by the point in which she's buried herself a third time with her underwear, preparing the Ironman doll to perform his assault, I finally speak again, causing the child to pause. "Willa," I breathe, my heart pounding faintly in my ears. "What are you doing?"

Her wary gaze rises to meet mine and she blinks, her arm beginning to tremble as she clutches the action figure tightly.

"Could you explain it to us?" Jenny adds, her voice laced with concern. "What is Ironman doing to Willa?"

"Why is she buried with her underwear?" I ask, earning a glance of warning from the doctor. Sighing, I take a moment to breathe, not wanting to say anything I might regret. "What is- sweetheart," I murmur as I notice the poor thing's eyes filling with tears. "What is Tony doing to you?"

"Hurting me," she concedes, her voice barely loud enough to hear. Her big green eyes peer up at mine and beg for what she's too afraid to out loud: to not hurt her, myself, to not be angry with her for expressing her feelings with her toys.

"Okay, Willa-bug," I nod, not completely understanding but deciding that at the moment, I don't really need to. My biggest priority for now has to be showing Willa that she's safe and that she's not in trouble for what she's admitted. "What if- how about Daddy comes and helps you?" I offer hopefully, taking the Captain America figure from Jenny carefully and holding it up for the little girl to see. "How about Daddy comes and protects you?"

"N-no," Willa refuses, picking up her sandbox and holding it slightly closer to herself, almost in a protective manner.

"Why not, sweetheart? How about Daddy comes and- comes and makes Tony stop, stops him from hurting you," I try, reaching out with the figure and trying to place it in the sandbox with the other two characters. Unexpectedly, Willa jerks it away, bits of sand spilling out from the sides as a look of anger forms on the child's face, a look I've never seen before. "Willa, please-" I insist, extending a hand to take hold of the sandbox.

But to my complete surprise, instead of pulling back again or allowing me, Willa throws the entire thing at me, sand dumping all over my clothes as she snaps, "No. You don't. You didn't."

As the dust settles into my lap and I blink away the sand from my eyes, I'm met with the sight of Willa staring back at me, any indication of anger or frustration completely drained from her face. Her eyes are as wide as saucers as she gawks at me, as if she, herself, can't believe what she's done. And before I can say anything, before I can reassure her or even try to calm her fears, she's jolted up onto her feet, running right out of her bedroom door.

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tavyliasin · 3 months

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Disability Pride Essays - Karlach and Terminal Illness

So to start the Disability Pride Month essays, I’m going to open with one of the heaviest topics of all - terminal illness. So, please be warned this discussion will include topics around euthanasia and will to live, such as they are reflected in Karlach’s story. I will also be mentioning a few terminal illnesses and their treatments by name. There is additionally some NSFW content in the discussion of how Karlach’s early game romance can relate to sex and intimacy for those with chronic conditions. So with this in mind, if you’re not in the right place to read this right now, please do feel free to skip it entirely. These topics are heavy and may be a lot to read for someone who has a connection to them. It is also not suitable for those under 18.

What Is Karlach’s Disability?

Karlach is one of the clearest examples of a disability parallel to me, and also one of the most complex. Of course there are choices in her story that affect the outcome, but those are strikingly similar to the choices people often make with real chronic, degenerative, and terminal illness. On the surface level, Karlach has a heart problem. Although it might not prevent her from performing a lot of day to day tasks (she can walk, run, and even fight just fine for the most part) the condition can still flare up causing her short periods of intense physical and psychological distress. We can also interpret some of this as being similar to mental health symptoms in which emotions are felt to a greater intensity and most people might experience them.

The other issue Karlach has in day-to-day life is around intimacy. Of course there aren’t really people who catch fire just for being close to someone they like, or who are literally too hot to touch, but there are those who find touch too painful. Those who, much as they might like to, can’t enjoy an intimate physical relationship due to pain.

How Do We See The Disability In The Game?

We see a longer progression with Karlach, and this reflects a lot of what we have in the real world with these situations. First she experiences the symptoms, then learns about them from Dammon who offers a temporary treatment to relieve some of it. Which is similar to a medical treatment, one that helps some of the symptoms but isn’t a cure. It buys time, but we know that her heart isn’t fully fixed, that she still can’t do everything she wants to. There are moments we see her emotions take over, or the physical aspects of the condition “flare up” as she struggles with it. Moving in to Act 2, we see another treatment, another sliver of hope, but it’s one that comes at a cost. We know that it will help her for now, the short term hope and joy that Karlach can actually enjoy intimacy and touch, but…it arrives with the knowledge that long term, there is no guaranteed cure. By Act 3, she is learning to live with it, finding more control over some of the outbursts (for example, she will hold off from attacking Gortash at the first meeting even though she’s clearly feeling a lot of intense emotions in that moment, compared to not holding back in the fight with the false paladins in Act 1.

How Does This Reflect Real Life

Really what we are seeing here is similar to a terminal illness like cancer, and other degenerative conditions that have a variable outcome. Treatments like chemotherapy or radiotherapy for some can offer hope at first, a test to see if it can treat the illness, often even with some initial positive results. At the very least, these can slow down the progression and buy time - much like the initial heart upgrades buy more time for Karlach.

Karlach, Sex, and Intimacy

We can take a closer look just at the intimacy side for a moment too, and how it’s handled within the game. Karlach’s early romance scene, it’s not safe for her to be intimate with a partner, much as she might want to, it would hurt them. One more direct real world parallel for this could be a condition called vaginismus, which can make vaginal penetration too painful for a sufferer to endure, and mean they are unable to enjoy a lot of sex acts. Similar to Karlach’s scene, some might look to different forms of intimacy with a partner like talking about fantasies, or other lighter and different types of partnered sexual pleasure. There are treatments for it, but they take time and patience, and might not be suitable for everyone. There are also, of course, conditions that can make sex acts painful or impossible for those with penises too - so again looking at these other forms of intimacy like sharing fantasies in conversation can be validating to see for people who aren’t able to (or even who simply don’t wish to) engage in a physical sexual relationship with a partner (or partners). There are plenty of disabilities that change how we approach sex and sexual intimacy, which in my opinion can make these scenes more impactful to those who might relate or may not have thought about this as an option in the past.

The Hardest Choices

The ending of Karlach’s storyline really is the most heartbreaking turning point. It’s a crossroads that many reach - a difficult decision between keeping on fighting a much harder battle like Karlach does if she goes to Avernus, not knowing if she will win, or choosing to stop fighting on their own terms. Karlach’s speech on the docks, and even several times she talks before that, really echoes some of the intense feelings and experiences of terminal illness. It’s a constant fight, and choosing to keep going - to keep hoping for a cure that might never come, to buy time - is to lose a lot of quality of life too. Because you can’t just take a day off from intensive treatments (or in her case, from fighting for her life in the hells), and although there are good things worth fighting for, and still some positives within it like the friends or partner who might travel with her to Avernus, sometimes…sometimes for people they don’t feel it’s worth it. They would rather choose a peaceful end, to lay down their sword and stop fighting, instead of continuing to struggle against the tide. Just like for the other characters - and for us as the players - this can be really hard for loved ones to accept. But at the end of the day it is the choice of the sufferer as to what they’re willing to endure. We can’t - and shouldn’t - force anyone to go through more than they genuinely want to. Of course they often want to live, and it is never an easy choice for a patient or for their family to know their time is coming to an end sooner than we would like, but the best we can do is to be there for them. To accept that living isn't quite so easy, that there is a balance to be struck and a toll to be paid. To listen, to make sure they aren’t there alone “on the docks” even if it’s hard.

What We Can Learn From Karlach’s Story

The main takeaway here is that terminal illness is going to affect people in all kinds of ways that might be unpredictable. They might act in ways that seem irrational to us, they might fall to despair or they might continue to hope and be an upbeat influence trying to support their loved ones. Often, it’s a mix of things. Our role as people who love them is to give them the space to talk, to be heard, and to respect their decisions even if it’s hard on us.

There will often be a choice to be made between quality of life and quantity of life, and much as everyone’s usual instinct is to live as long and as much as they can, it isn’t fair to expect someone to endure an endless battle that might have nothing at the end other than an even less kind passing. We can also be more aware of different kinds of intimacy with partners who have difficulty with physical sex acts, and find the things that might be enjoyable instead. So perhaps next time you’re playing through the game, take a moment to listen closer to the lines between the lines, hear the echoes of real world voices from the heartfelt and impassioned speeches we hear from this complex and beloved character.

With Thanks

I’m going to round this one off with my deepest gratitude to Larian Studios for the wonderful writing and production in the game, and to Sam too for their absolutely unforgettable performance as Karlach. I have seen several people in my life go through stages of terminal illnesses, as well as others fighting their "battles through Avernus" with hope in their hearts. Whether it was intentional or not, I feel like Karlach’s story is a truly beautiful and heartfelt mirror to these experiences, as we see her struggle with everything it means and all the decisions to be made along the way.

My love, as always, goes out to all of you who have been affected by chronic and terminal illness, whether in yourselves or in those around you.

#baldurs gate 3 #karlach #disability #terminal illness #chronic illness #essayposting #bg3 essay

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macgyvermedical · 7 months

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Okay so I have a really specific question. Baseline stats? Except my character is already pretty sick, he's got room to get much much worse but right now he ain't great. He's in a fair amount of pain because he keeps having adverse reactions to painkillers from previous drug abuse and yeah. So what would normal baseline be? And then what would a normal baseline for him bc since he's got this illness. It's idk what you call it but one of the illness that get worse with time... degenerative. Except in this world he can be fixed with enough treatment but he keeps refusing said treatment. Yeah I don't really understand vitals and things so I didn't wanna botch it but based on the info what would you assume would be good? Also what's like the worse someone's vitals could be with them still awake and alive although the mental state can be real messed up. (: thanks hon

So our understanding of normal adult vitals include:

BP: 100/60- 140/90 mmHg (a measurement of pressure)

Pulse: 60-100 beats per minute

Respirations: 12-20 breaths per minute

Temperature: 96-100.4F or 36-38C

SpO2: 95-100%

Level of Consciousness: Alert and Oriented times 4 (can answer 4 specific questions about themselves and their environment)

Now, all these "normals" pretty much assume a healthy, white, 20-something male who has a BMI of 18-25 and who has been sitting quietly for at least 5 minutes. So basically very few real humans.

It's very normal to vary from these somewhat if you are exerting yourself, in pain, sick, or otherwise different from the above demographic. So if we're taking vitals, we want to control what we can (generally asking the person to sit relatively quietly for 5 minutes). If we do this and you're out of range, but we have no other data to work with, we will try to get you back into this range. Because again, it's assumed that to get out of these ranges, you must have something going on medically that needs addressed.

For example, if your blood pressure is 160/90 with a heart rate of 110 because you're in a lot of pain, we can correct that by treating whatever is causing the pain.

Now, there's not always an identifiable (or fixable) reason why someone might be out of range, and sometimes we just correct the vitals themselves because chronically high or low vitals may cause problems. For example, as far as we know right now, living for a long time with a blood pressure in the 180s/100s will eventually cause heart failure, stroke, or heart attack, regardless of the reason. So if we can't get that person back into range by fixing something else, we'll give medications that directly lower blood pressure.

But let's say someone's heart rate is in the 40s because they're a runner. That's normal for them. It doesn't cause them any problems, it's not caused by a disease process, as far as we know won't cause them problems in the future, and their other vital signs are in normal range. They are said to have a "baseline heart rate of 40bpm". That tells other medical providers who are working with them that there's nothing to correct there- ignore that weird reading and just fix anything else that needs fixed.

Baseline can also be used if someone has a chronic illness that is as controlled as it can be, but it still has an impact on their vital signs. Say someone has a heart rhythm called atrial fibrillation with RVR and their heart rate without medications is in the 190s or 200s. This may cause symptoms, but if we medicate to control that rate to between 60-100, it may also cause symptoms.

So we might give enough medication to control the rate to 110s, which minimizes the symptoms they experience but still puts them technically out of range. Their baseline, then, is in the 110s. Again, nothing to correct there, it's just normal for them to be out of range on that vital.

Or, someone might have dementia and be unable to answer all the questions that would make them A+Ox4, but maybe can only consistently answer 2 of them. We wouldn't necessarily be worried about that because we know that it's normal for them to be A+Ox2- their baseline, but we would be worried if suddenly they were A+Ox0.

You can also have other measurements besides vitals that are considered baseline stats. Like pain, or blood sugar, BMI, electrolyte levels, or pretty much any other lab value.

As far as what you are describing I don't know that I can give you specific baselines, as I don't know what his symptoms are or how they relate to vital signs. With chronic pain generally vitals eventually go back to normal (say someone rates their pain at a 5/10 consistently, over time their body normalizes around that pain level and other vitals may only go out of range if they have an acute spike in pain).

What I can give you is a few of the following:

Pain: All vital signs go up

Dehydration/blood loss/shock: BP and LOC goes down, everything else goes up

Kidney problems: BP and HR can change but in what direction is due to the specific problem.

Opioid overdose: RR goes down.

Heart problems: Change in HR and BP but directions can change depending on specific problem.

Lung problems: Usually RR and HR go up

Throwing up: everything goes up

Drug abuse and withdrawal: depends on the drug

#whump reference #writing reference #treatment #vital signs #baseline

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mariacallous · 7 months

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In many areas of health, women receive worse care, and suffer worse outcomes, than men. Women experience higher rates of adverse drug reactions. Across hundreds of diseases, they are diagnosed later than men. Women are more likely to suffer from common mental health conditions. In moments of acute pain, women are less likely to be given painkillers.

One small positive is that this gender health gap is finally getting the attention it deserves. “We’re much more aware of these issues now than we were previously,” says Angela Saini, a journalist and the author of Inferior: How Science Got Women Wrong. “It’s become a huge topic right across academia, medical research, health institutions, everywhere. Even everyday people see it in the press all the time.”

Seeing this health gap is one thing. Knowing what causes it is another—as only then can it be fixed. Ahead of speaking at WIRED Health in London on March 19, Saini sat down with WIRED to talk about how the gender health gap is misperceived and what needs to change for it to be closed. This interview has been edited for clarity and length.

How is the gender health gap being misunderstood?

We make assumptions about sex and gender which may not explain the gaps that we’re seeing. It’s very common for people to make very bold assertions about men’s and women’s bodies being completely different, and needing a completely different system of health care, needing different regimes of research, when in fact, sex only really matters in certain contexts when it comes to health.

Very often what we’re seeing in terms of gender health gaps are failures to do with sexism, and misdiagnosis because of assumptions based on history and myths in health research.

Take heart attacks. Women are very likely to have them. But society associates heart attacks with men. When a man has typical heart attack symptoms, people—and I mean everyone, men, women, health professionals—are much quicker to identify that as a heart attack than when a woman has exactly the same symptoms. We don’t think of women as having heart attacks in the same way as men. That’s not a sex difference—it’s about the gender assumptions that we have that we associate with certain conditions.

Where we’re at now, there’s public awareness and academic awareness about gender health gaps. But work needs to be done at a much deeper level, from condition to condition, to understand what the actual reasons are underlying the differences we’re seeing. Is it a sex difference? Or is it sexism?

Where are these things being confused?

Consider the sleep drug zolpidem. Here’s a medicine the US Food and Drug Administration approved years ago, with guidance to doctors on different dosages for men and women. There are very few drugs like this. If you look at drug labeling, it’s very unusual to have different doses for men and women.

The reason given was that researchers noticed women were processing the drug more slowly than men. So in the morning, if they had taken this as an insomnia treatment the night before, women would still be feeling sleepy, which would be a problem if they had to drive a car or operate heavy machinery. So they said women should take half the dose.

But what later research revealed was that the difference doctors were seeing was less due to some innate sex difference and more to do with weight. The size of your body also impacts how quickly or how slowly you process a drug.

Well, if weight here is being used as a proxy for sex or gender, a larger woman would need the higher dose; a smaller man a lower dose. So why would you just not use weight as the measure for what dose a person should get? That would be a much more effective way of deciding. But because we collect data along certain lines and not others, then guidelines get written along certain lines and not others.

To give another example, sometimes women’s pain is not fully appreciated when they come forward. Women are statistically more likely to go to a doctor when in pain compared to a man. But then common myths and assumptions start to emerge: “It’s not that serious.” “She’s being hysterical.”

So there are lots of things to pick apart here. It’s the picking apart that we often don’t bother with. We just see a difference, and then that gets ascribed to something without us really knowing what the root cause is.

So how can we get better at picking apart sex differences and sexism to reduce the gender health gap?

For me, it’s about taking medicine to the next level of investigation, which is at the level of the social determinants of health. Many of the things that kill most of us have a huge social or environmental component. Things like diet, stress, the way that we are treated in society.

It’s only relatively recently that research started to be done into the impact of sexism and racism on health, and the impact of other social factors. The job that you do, your status as a married person or not, these can also have health outcomes.

So there’s all these little pieces where research is needed, and it’s an ongoing project. It's not as though you’ll only do a study once into the effects of being married or being a stay-at-home wife on your health. Because those social factors are always changing.

Sex and gender is an aspect of this social story. But it’s important to understand where it can be appropriately invoked. Sometimes gender is relevant, sometimes it’s not. Sometimes sex matters, sometimes it doesn’t.

What’s standing in the way of things getting better?

Well, research funding agencies are much more interested in looking inside our bodies for explanations for why things are as they are. The outside world is much more difficult to study, because social circumstances are always changing. They can be very different between households, even within households. It’s much harder to collect data on social circumstances.

But we’re at the stage where we can learn so much from people’s mobile phones tracking their activity. Data is being collected on what people are eating, their movements, how active they are. Eventually we’ll be able to build personalized pictures of people, and stop generalizing about people in groups and assuming that they’re typical of that group, and then understand them as a complex individual.

Who is making progress on understanding and closing the gender health gap?

Sarah Richardson’s team at Harvard University—she runs the GenderSci Lab—has done incredible work breaking down the causes of gender health disparities. They’re getting medical researchers to think very carefully about the context of the conditions that they're investigating.

The team did brilliant work during the pandemic. At the beginning there were all these very wild claims about gender differences with the virus—for instance, that women were protected because on average they have a stronger immune system. They showed that if you looked at the data this didn’t really hold up. They helped dispel this very pseudoscientific assumption that the virus was hitting all populations uniformly, and helped end the neglect of demographic patterns as a factor in Covid, the kind of jobs that people were doing, who were frontline workers, and so on.

This work around sex contextualism, as Richardson calls it, is a really compelling model for how to think about sex and gender in research.

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onlinedietarysupplement · 1 month

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How do CoQ10 Supplements Help Improve Heart Health?

A healthy heart is a primary requirement for healthy living, and your diet has a crucial role in doing so. A nutritious diet containing a balance of vitamins, proteins, and carbohydrates is all you need to take regularly. A balanced diet is not enough as you also need to perform exercise in your daily routine. For some people, following a balanced diet with regular exercising is not possible due to their health condition or any other reason.

What those people can do is look for alternative ways. And, when we talk about alternative ways, taking natural supplements to lower cholesterol is one of the best ways to keep your heart healthy. Supplements such as Coenzyme Q10 (CoQ10) have proven beneficial, especially among people with cardiovascular disease (CVD). Thus, the risk of experiencing repeat heart attacks will be minimal, and its use will also lower blood pressure. Before going any further, let’s know about CoQ10.

What is Coenzyme Q10 (CoQ10)?

CoQ10 is a natural substance present in every cell of the human body. Its role is to convert food into energy, and it does so by making the antioxidant adenosine triphosphate (ATP), which is primarily responsible for the transfer of energy and also protects cells from oxidative stress. Even CoQ10 is in the body itself; however, there are foods that speed up its production, and those foods include vegetables, such as cauliflower, broccoli, and asparagus, and organ meats, such as liver or kidneys, and fish, such as mackerel and sardines.

Role of CoQ10 in Heart Health

It has been proven in many researches that CoQ10 is beneficial for many health conditions, especially heart conditions. Let’s shed light on the heart conditions this supplement is helpful for.

Cardiovascular Disease (CVD):

CoQ10 supplements will raise High-Density Lipoprotein Cholesterol or HDL-C and Apolipoprotein ApoA1 levels and keep cardiovascular disease at bay. CoQ10 supplements also lower inflammatory biomarkers, such as high-sensitivity C-reactive protein, a risk factor for CVD. For your information, a lower CoQ10 level may cause greater tissue damage to the heart, especially during a heart attack and brain stroke.

Heart Failure:

A heart failure is another heart condition that CoQ10 is quite effective, and its continued use improves mortality rate. A research study by a multi-center on 420 patients found that deaths have reduced to almost half. The study has been carried over a period of two years, which is enough time to get to this conclusion.

Statin-Related Muscle Symptoms

Statin therapy is quite effective in minimizing heart attacks and strokes; however, about 25 percent of people quit this treatment within six months because of new health problems, such as body aches and weakness. When those people with statin-related muscle symptoms started taking CoQ10 supplements twice a day, they reported reduced pain.

After Heart Attacks

Patients who started taking CoQ10 supplements found a reduction in subsequent cardiac events in the future. It is like a blessing in disguise for those people. A CoQ10 supplement is the best natural supplement for cholesterol.

High Blood Pressure

CoQ10 is quite effective in lowering systolic blood pressure. When we talk about the exact number, the systolic pressure reading lowers up to 17mm Hg, and the diastolic pressure reading up to 10mm Hg. All this happens without any significant side effects.

In conclusion, CoQ10 supplements are effective in several health conditions, particularly cardiovascular conditions. Whether it is about reducing the risk of heart attacks, improving survival rates in heart failure patients, alleviating statin-related muscle symptoms, or lowering blood pressure, CoQ10 offers a natural and effective solution. Incorporating CoQ10 supplements into your routine, alongside a balanced diet and regular exercise, you can support your heart and overall well-being.

#healthy heart tips #naturachol #Improve Heart Health #What is Coenzyme Q10 #Role of CoQ10 in Heart Health #Cardiovascular Disease #heart care tips #CoQ10 supplements #best natural supplement for cholesterol

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scotianostra · 2 months

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July 18th 1792 saw the death of John Paul Jones in Paris.

I covered the life of "The Father of the US Navy" in my post on his birth date a little over a fortnight ago so wont cover old ground, instead will go through his final days and his death, which many deemed to be mysterious, in Paris France.

As far as we know, John Paul Jones was in good health until 1770, when a severe fever sent him to bed for 16 days and left him ‘much reduced’. Nothing more is known of the character of this illness or its treatment. He was 23, serving in the West Indies and recovered. Except for two other unnamed illnesses and recurrent psychological highs and lows bordering on manic-depressive disorder, he seems to have been well for the next seven years.

In 1780, after many months at sea, he complained his eyes were so sore that he was almost blind, and for a time was so incapacitated that he gave up visiting friends on shore. His behaviour then was ‘Qweeg-like, suspicious and slightly dotty’, and though only 33, he felt like an old man. Three years later, during further service in the West Indies, a severe attack of ‘tropical fever’ caused him to travel to a Moravian sanatorium in Bethlehem, Palestine, for hydrotherapy, after which he recovered.

At the age of 41, Jones became ill during an overland trip in an open carriage from Hamburg to Copenhagen. From Copenhagen, he travelled to St. Petersburg through ice floes in a small open boat to take command of a Russian fleet, arriving exhausted, sick and depressed. The illness lingered on for months. Although its specific characteristics are unknown, it is believed to have involved the lungs; afterwards, he had a persistent hacking cough and ‘Grey visage

Shortly before his 45th birthday, Jones’ health declined rapidly. The nature of his final illness is described vividly in a letter written by a close friend, Col. Samuel Blackden, to Jones’ sister shortly after the naval hero’s death. In it, Blackden says of Jones:

" But for two months past he began to lose his appetite, grew yellow, and showed symptoms of jaundice. For this he took medical treatment and for a short time seemed to grow better. A few days before his death his legs began to swell, which proceeded upward to his body, so that for two days before his decease he could not button his waistcoat and had great difficulty in breathing ... [He] put off the making of his will until the afternoon of July 18, when he was prevailed upon to send for a notary and made his will. M. Beaupoil and myself witnessed it and left him sitting in a chair in his parlor. A few minutes after we retired he walked into his chamber and laid himself upon his face on the bedside, with his feet on the floor. The Queen’s physician, who was attending him, came soon after, and on entering the apartment found him in that position, and on trying to lift him up found that he had expired. His disorder had terminated in dropsy of the heart. His body was put into a leaden coffin [and submerged in alcohol] on the 20th, that, in case the United States, which he had so essentially served and with so much honor, should claim his remains they might be more easily removed "

One hundred and thirteen years later (in 1905), the remains of John Paul Jones were recovered and autopsied. According to L. Capitan and Victor Cornil, who performed the autopsy:

"The only organs which were injured were the kidneys As far as can be judged, by examination of the badly preserved viscera(which included the heart, aorta, liver, gallbladder and spleen but not the brain), we believe that the case in point is interstitial nephritis, with fibrous degeneracy of the glomeruli of Malpighi, which quite agrees with the symptoms observed during life. "

The autopsy goes on in some detail, I wont bore you with it but at the end of the day, the kidney failure/disease killed him, but there is no explanation of how it came about.

Jone's liver was normal, he wasn't the cliched stereotypical Scot, he abstained from spirits, his tipple was wine and it is said he drunk no more than three glasses,so alcohol was ruled out, as was lead poisoning, which would have come from the wine of the era. Cardiac arrhythmia or some other complication of uremia has been the conclusions. The first is a group of conditions that cause the heart to beat irregular, too slowly, or too quickly, the second occurs when your kidneys become damaged. The toxins, or bodily waste, that your kidneys normally send out in your urine end up in your bloodstream instead.

With regard to the question of the true ‘father’ of the United States Navy, no one person emerged as singularly worthy of the title in the aftermath of the American Revolution. Following the war, Jones left America embittered by a lack of recognition and served briefly as an officer in Catherine the Great’s imperial fleet before fleeing Russia over an apparently trumped up rape charge. Hopeful of securing another naval commission, he travelled to Paris where he died in 1792, lonely and forgotten. Because the American minister, Gouverneur Morris, refused to claim his body, a French official paid to have the corpse packed in straw and alcohol and sealed in a lead coffin for possible future transport to the United States.

If it wasn't for the foresight of this unknown French official the fate of John Paul Jones would have been unknown.

#scotland #scottish #history #sdailor #naval figure #USA

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x22817 · 3 months

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Today's endocrinologist appointment was not what I was expecting (in a good way)

Apparently, my cardiologist and my endocrinologist have been talking about me. They are good friends who have published several papers together and have taken an interest in me.

The new theory is that I could not have any form of adrenal insufficiency, rather some form of autonomic disorder. I do have Addison's because I tested positive for the antibodies, but we're still thinking of different causes. I was diagnosed with vasodepressive syncopal disorder at 17, but no one could figure out the cause. Apparently, it has been bothering the crap out of my cardiologist.

They now think that I could have a form of POTS that is exacerbated by lots of inflammation. My adrenals could, in fact, be working (if only a little bit). They just aren't getting the signal to produce anything.

POTS makes sense for all my signs and symptoms pre treatment. My new cardiologist wanted to diagnose me with it, but he said that the treatment was working well enough he just wanted to put the less specific vasodepressive disorder as the diagnosis. By finding and treating the primary adrenal insufficiency, we have (more or less) solved almost all of my issues.

The prednisone is treating all the inflammation (not just in my joints). I had so much inflammation that when I coughed, I would put pressure on my vagus nerve enough to send me into cardiac arrest. This happened two times in less than a month. The second time, I was dead for several minutes. I'm on a higher than normal adrenal support dose (7.5mg), which supports my cardiologist's theory and priority of keeping me from having a third heart attack.

The only way to find out if any of this is true is to go off all the drugs and run lots of tests. This would likely kill me very quickly, so we aren't doing that.

The fludrocortisone is keeping my blood pressure from bottoming out seemingly randomly. I was so hypovolemic and dehydrated I would go into cardiogenic shock. It wouldn't only be when I changed positions (sitting to standing). I would faint on the couch, in bed, sitting in the bath. Any time I wasn't in the shock position, it was always a possibility.

I also don't have to consume roughly five times the normal person's daily salt intake anymore (I'm down to twice as much as the average joe) which isn't a huge deal but it's nice to not have to put salt on/in everything just to stay hydrated.

We decided not to change anything. Just have the routine six month bloodwork done. Keep doing what I'm doing.

All in all, I'd say it was a good appointment!

#beans beans the magickal fruit #service dog #spoonie #chronic illness #disability #dogblr #dogs of tumblr #autoimmune #pots

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htbrpblog · 4 months

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(OOC: Trigger/content warning for gore descriptions. It's basically just infodumping about wounds and treatments because, come on, he'd do this if he had a blog. Plus, it's an excuse for me to infodump). There are so many things that can go wrong from a cut, so I'm going to tell you some of them.

(OOC: Badeline sprite by Amora Bettany. Sprite edit by me. These are meant to be visualizations).

The first layer of skin is called the epidermis. The epidermis is very thin, and if you get cut only to that layer, it will not bleed. The epidermis does not contain any type of blood vessel. The very outer layers are often dead, so sometimes you will not feel anything if it is damaged, just like hair and fingernails. These won't cause too much damage, but you must wash them with soap and water anyway because they can still get infected. The next layer of skin is called the dermis. The dermis has arterioles, and capillaries. You might see veins and nerves there by proxy if you get to the reticular layer, but they are a little deeper. If you are bleeding, wash the cut, or it will likely get infected by something. Most of the time it won't be something deadly, but there are many deadly infections you could catch, so that is why it is important. If the blood squirts at this layer, you likely got an arteriole, and you should put pressure on the wound to stop the bleeding. If you have healing medicine to put on the cut, use it. If a cut gapes, you must use medical tape or steri-strips to hold it closed. If you don't have either of those, use anything that can hold the cut closed for weeks. The best thing to do would be to go to the doctor and let them treat you, or at least go to the store and get the proper materials. If your cut is yellow on the inside and looks bumpy, that's the hypodermis, and you need to go to the hospital because that can turn very deadly, and you'll need stiches. Here is where the veins and nerves are, and if a nerve got cut, it's going to be extremely painful, and nerves don't always heal. There are arteries as well. If an artery is damaged, it will squirt blood, and it is very dangerous to leave untreated. This is how people can die of blood loss. I have hardly even mentioned the deadly diseases that could kill you from just a small untreated wound. The first one is gangrene. Gangrene is when your cells die because there is no blood flow. It can actually be caused by an infection, and some people have gotten gangrene and died from it after only having a minor cut. There are a few types of gangrene. Dry gangrene is the specific type I was informing you about a few sentences ago. Wet gangrene is when you get an infection on top of your gangrene, which makes it deadly. Gas gangrene is when there is gas under your skin, causing it to create bubbles. It is deadly as well. The last type is internal gangrene. It can happen if your organs are slipping through a hole in your body, also called a hernia. It is also deadly. Sepsis is when your body tries to treat an infection but gets confused and attacks itself instead. This is why it's so important not to let any wound get infected. When it progresses, it will turn into septic shock. You will feel like you are dying because you will be dying. Some symptoms are being very confused, flu symptoms, difficulty breathing, fast heart rate, low blood pressure, pain, or being unable to stand up or stay awake. If a wound goes septic, you have to go to the hospital immediately, or you will probably die. Back to the main topic, if you manage to get a cut to the fascia, which covers the muscle tissue and can look white, grey, or blue, you must go to the hospital. You can also get necrosis from an injury like this, which is like gangrene, but it's not from a lack of blood supply. It will damage whatever cells it affects permanently, and it usually will affect the deeper tissues. If you manage to get an injury that goes all the way to your muscle or bone, like if you aren't careful with an electric saw, you need to go to the hospital. That could sever tendons or ligaments, so you won't be able to move that area as much anymore. You should always clean your wounds with soap and water. Water does nothing by itself. Do not use hydrogen peroxide, it'll kill your cells as well as the bacteria. Cover your cuts with bandages. Go to the hospital of you must. Do not wait to treat you injuries.

#hail true body #htb #roleplay #roleplay blog #rp #rp blog #tw #cw #trigger warning #content warning #tw gore #trigger warning gore #cw gore #content warning gore

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givehimthemedicine · 1 year

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where does El's NINA blood keep going?

so I was talking about how the nosebleeds El gets inside NINA match her nosebleeds in the "memories" she's experiencing right then. I'm telling you those aren't just memories, but that's not the point of this post.

em just like you said about how that weird Henward closeup would be way too apparent if they had put the shots side by side, if they didn't keep cutting away to other stories in the middle of El's NINA scenes this would have been glaringly noticeable.

4x5

El has her bloody-hands-light-circle-game flashback in which she's bleeding from one nostril. this causes her such distress that she goes into cardiac arrest inside the NINA tank, where we see her also bleeding from the same nostril.

we cut away to other stories awhile and the next thing we see of El is this: getting shocked awake on the table outside the NINA tank. then she hits Brenner and makes a run for it.

what happened to her nose blood?

4x6

El has her post-bullying flashback, in which she sort of "catches" bloodstains from the vision of her little self in the mirror. and then she wakes up like this - clean - and says "I killed them didn't I?"

we aren't shown an in-tank view on this occasion, which I really wish we were.

4x7 - 4x8

One tries to kill El but she breaks out of it sporting a two-nostril bleed, which also appears in the tank:

once again we cut away, this time til a whole other episode, and the next time we see her she's being shocked on the table looking like this:

where 👏 is 👏 the 👏 blood?

occam's razor says the doctors merely cleaned up her blood in between the shots we're shown. but why?

aside from the fact that there's no reason for doing that besides cosmetic - having a little blood on her upper lip doesn't interfere with the seal of the oxygen mask or anything like that -

why would they take the time to do something so trivial BEFORE administering life saving measures? remember, the literal fate of humanity is riding on this girl's success. you can clean her nose to your heart's content, AFTER you make sure she's not dying.

and even if they did wipe her nose, they did it so well that there's zero residue. not even IN her nostril. it looks like she never bled at all.

where 👏 is 👏 the 👏 water?

something else that's bothering me now that I'm all up in these screenshots:

in some of these NINA wakeups El seems remarkably dry for someone who was just floating in water seconds earlier. I know, her hair is dry because she was wearing a cap, that doesn't count. but her suit would still be wet.

look in 4x5 look how wet the table around El is, and the puddle she leaves when she gets up.

compared to 4x6 and 4x8 where things seem pretty dry. granted her neck/chest skin looks a little wet, varyingly, but she could be sweating a lot which is a heart attack symptom.

look, you cannot lie on a table in a wet wetsuit without leaving a wet spot on the table when you get up. you also cannot haul a dripping wet person out of a tub of water and plop them down on a table without leaving some drips along the floor from point A to point B.

either more time elapses than we think - enough for her to dry - between the onset and treatment of El's heart attacks (which makes no sense)

or maybe it's straitjacket time: that's not the same girl.

we never do actually see them fish her out of the tank in any of these scenes. what if the El on the table isn't necessarily the same El as the one in the tank?

idk but there's something is weird about this part where Owens sees El having a heart attack in the tank and is yelling at Brenner to pull her out, and not only is Brenner not in a hurry, but he doesn't seem to want to at all. he never agrees. the scene just ends like this.

if they indeed just have this one chance to save the world, this one girl, why isn't Brenner in a hurry to preserve her life?

Brenner: "if you are lost, so are we all" also Brenner: sees Humanity's Only Chance having a heart attack and orders no action to save her

I'm back in my twingate era yall. except there might be like 4 of her.

#what if all this time I've been chasing after some other kid.wav or however it goes #I know the conclusions I make in this post are not wholly consistent I'm just saying It's Strange #also smth smth Will being wet/dry in the ud #givehimthemedicine analysis #analysis #mine #also smth weird about the way el wakes up with a vendetta against the water tank itself #like first thing she does is sit up and look at it like that bitch nina just said something about her mom #what if Other El is still in there all sloshing around lol

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