#Coercive Recovery

[unwelcome-ozian]

[therealmumlife]

I gotta start using this tumblr as a way to vent, I need to let all these thoughts and feelings out somewhere.

I'm so tired of holding it all inside, tired of feeling invisible and insignificant. Tired of being quietened when I want to scream, tired of building up the courage to speak out, only to be dismissed or have it all minimised.

I'm so tired. In my heart, in my soul, in my very being. And I don't mean tired physically, I mean I am hurting badly, drained mentally and emotionally.

I mean my mind has been battling to think clearly, to feel like a functioning human being who's worthy of the most basic human decency. I mean I've used up most of my brainspace and energy to get through the day, trying to remember reality in minute detail, because I know I'll be told with 100% certainty that the day went differently than I'd experienced it, it'll be twisted up and I'll be told my reality is wrong. I'm tired of fighting to keep my sanity, tired of begging to be treated with some semblance of common courtesy, to be considered, to be seen, to be heard.

I mean my heart and mind are both drained from battling with the disbelief, disappointment and degradation they've been suffering. Trying to accept what feels so, so unacceptable. Trying to make the best out of it, for my children and myself. Trying to act like everything's alright when it's not, and hasn't been for years... it's exhausting.

I thought it would all stop when we separated and I asked him to leave. It got worse.

The emotional abuse, the financial abuse, the coercive control and constant manipulation is easier to spot now, but not easier to deal with. I need to heal and I need to break the cycle. I need strength.

[maaarine]

Why Does He Do That? Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men (Lundy Bancroft, 2002)

“If abusiveness were the product of childhood emotional injury, abusers could overcome their problem through psychotherapy. 

But it is virtually unheard of for an abusive man to make substantial and lasting changes in his pattern of abusiveness as a result of therapy. 

He may work through other emotional difficulties, he may gain insight into himself, but his behavior continues. 

In fact it typically gets worse, as he uses therapy to develop new excuses for his behavior, more sophisticated arguments to prove that his partner is mentally unstable, and more creative ways to make her feel responsible for his emotional distress. 

Abusive men are sometimes masters of the hard-luck story, and may find that accounts of childhood abuse are one of the best ways to pull heartstrings. 

For some abusive men, the blame-the-childhood approach has an additional reason for being appealing: By focusing on what his mother did wrong, he gets to blame a woman for his mistreatment of women. 

This explanation can also appeal to the abused woman herself, since it makes sense out of his behavior and gives her someone safe to be angry at—since getting angry at him always seems to blow up in her face. 

The wider society, and the field of psychology in particular, has often jumped on this bandwagon instead of confronting the hard questions that partner abuse raises. 

Abuse of women by men is so rampant that, unless people can somehow make it women’s own fault, they are forced to take on a number of uncomfortable questions about men and about much of male thinking. 

So it may seem easier to just lay the problem at the feet of the man’s mother? 

My clients who have participated extensively in therapy or substance-abuse recovery programs sometimes sound like therapists themselves—and a few actually have been—as they adopt the terms of popular psychology or textbook theory. 

One client used to try to lure me into intellectual debates with comments such as, “Well, your group follows a cognitive-behavioral model, which has been shown to have limitations for addressing a problem as deep as this one.” 

An abusive man who is adept in the language of feelings can make his partner feel crazy by turning each argument into a therapy session in which he puts her reactions under a microscope and assigns himself the role of “helping” her. 

He may, for example, “explain” to her the emotional issues she needs to work through, or analyze her reasons for “mistakenly” believing that he is mistreating her. 

An abusive man may embellish his childhood suffering once he discovers that it helps him escape responsibility. (…)

Therapy focuses on the man’s feelings and gives him empathy and support, no matter how unreasonable the attitudes that are giving rise to those feelings.

An abuser program, on the other hand, focuses on his thinking.

The feelings that the abuser program discusses are primarily his partner’s and his children’s, not his. (…)

Therapy typically will not address any of the central causes of abusiveness, including entitlement, coercive control, disrespect, superiority, selfishness, or victim blaming.

An abuser program is expected to cover all of these issues and in fact to make them its primary focus.”

[hyperlexichypatia]

Four Models

 A rough overview and gross oversimplification of four paradigms of mental difference, written as a handy summary since I get asked about it a lot.

One is the strict behavioral/moral model paradigm. This view completely disregards brains and mental inner states in general, and is focused solely on socially normative behavior. In this view, every individual has a moral obligation to obey authority and to adhere to normative social standards of behavior -- in a family, in mainstream, top-down schools, and in a workplace as a successful seller of labor. Being constitutionally ill-suited for these structures is no excuse not to conform to them. People should be punished for failing to obey authority or conform to normative social standards, regardless of their brains or mental states.

The second is the mainstream medical model. This is the view that most influences public policy decisions in the U.S. In this view, there is such a thing as a normal, healthy type of brain. People with this type of brain are able to conform to social norms and authorities with minimal difficulty. There is some disagreement about what exactly a "healthy" brain is, but essentially, it is a brain possessing of qualities that proponents of this paradigm consider desirable -- so as is generally understood, a "healthy" brain is one conforming to American upper-middle-class, politically centrist attitudes, behaviors, ways of communicating, and ways of learning. According to this paradigm, deviations from this healthy, normal way of being are caused by physical illnesses or chemical imbalances in the structure of the brain. The solution is either medication to "correct" the "chemical imbalance," or behavioral therapy to train the brain to operate in more normative ways, or a combination of the two. Using these methods to achieve as close as possible to a normative brain is considered the morally correct and socially responsible course of action. And because this paradigm conceptualizes some brains as objectively defective, some people with such brains are unable to make reasoned, logical, correct decisions about their own brains, and should therefore be legally coerced into treatment against their will. This practice is considered both humane (because it is correcting an objective defect, the subject cannot possibly be unhappy with the result -- or rather, any unhappiness with the result can be attributed to the uncorrected defect, and is evidence that further coercive correction is needed) and necessary for public safety, since this paradigm also often equates violence and abuse with brain defects.

A third paradigm is the recovery model. This is similar to the mainstream medical model in its conception of what constitutes a normal, healthy mind, but differs from the mainstream medical model in that the recovery view adamantly rejects the premise that mental differences are caused by structural or chemical differences of the brain. Instead, this paradigm holds that deviations from the "normal, healthy mind" are caused by traumatic experiences, and that the solution is some form of trauma-informed therapy. Once the traumatic experiences are therapeutically processed and healed, the mentally deviant individual will "recover" to what this model posits is the default state of a normal, healthy mind. Like the behavioral/moral model and the mainstream medical model, the recovery model holds that a mentally deviant individual has a social responsibility to correct their deviance. But while proponents of the behavioral/moral model tend to emphasize obedience and conformity as virtues in their own right, and proponents of the mainstream medical model tend to emphasize the premise that mental deviants are incompetent to make their own decisions, proponents of recovery tend to emphasize "healthy relationships." The obligation to seek treatment is justified from the premise that exposure to people's mental differences (or, in the framework of this paradigm, "symptoms of unresolved trauma") cause emotional burdens to those around them, and that excising these mental traits is necessary to have "healthy," non-burdensome relationships.

Finally, there is the neurodiversity model, which is why this page exists. Under this paradigm, there is no such thing as a "healthy" or "normal" mind, and no such thing as an "ill" or "disordered" mind. There are just... minds. That differ from one another. That have different strengths and weaknesses, but that are not inherently better or worse than any other. If a person is ill-suited to a school, or a workplace, or a social institution, the solution is to change the social institution to be more welcoming and accommodating to all ways of being. Furthermore, since all minds are equally valid, all minds are equally competent to make decisions about their own host bodies. No one is better equipped to make a decision about an individual's body's or mind's best interests than that individual themself -- therefore, practices like forced drugging, involuntary hospitalization, and other forms of overriding individuals' bodily autonomy for their alleged "own good" are inherently unjustifiable.. In this view, neurodivergent people are not burdens; rather, the expectations of neuro-normative society are the burdens on neurodivergent people. It's important to note that this paradigm does not preclude the voluntary use of brain-altering medication or therapies. Rather, it reconceptualizes them as tools an individual may find useful for enhancing their quality of life, not as "treatments" for any kind of illness or disorder. It's also important to note that, under this paradigm, brains and emotional states are distinct from planned, chosen beliefs and behaviors (whether those beliefs and behaviors are good, bad, or neutral). No one's brain "causes" them to be a murderer or an abuser or a Nazi (or a kind and honorable person).

Because the neurodiversity model is the least popular and least well known of these, people who encounter it for the first time often mistake it for an offshoot of one of the other three. There are points of overlap -- like proponents of the behavioral/moral model, we acknowledge that humans have the capacity to make moral choices, and that no one's brain "causes" them to be a murderer or a Nazi. Like proponents of the mainstream medical model, we accept that physical, structural brain differences exist, corresponding with different ways of thinking, feeling, and learning, and that people cannot change their brain structure by force of will alone. Like proponents of the recovery model, we believe that forced drugging is abhorrent, and that material and social conditions are a much bigger factor in people's happiness or unhappiness than brain chemistry. But despite these superficial overlaps, the neurodiversity paradigm is fundamentally distinct from, and incompatible with, these other three. The neurodiversity paradigm is fundamentally radical, in the literal sense of "from the root." We challenge the root premise that mental difference needs to be changed or fixed, and switch the focus to providing tools that individuals can choose to use to connect their brains to their goals.

[unwelcome-ozian]

[howwelldoyouknowyourmoon]

Walking Free from the Trauma of Coercive, Cultic and Spiritual Abuse

A Workbook for Recovery and Growth

By Gillie Jenkinson

This book is being published by Routledge on May 23, 2023

https://www.routledge.com/Walking-Free-from-the-Trauma-of-Coercive-Cultic-and-Spiritual-Abuse-A/Jenkinson/p/book/9781032305875

Gillie Jenkinson, PhD, is an accredited psychotherapist, international speaker and a director of Hope Valley Counselling. For over 25 years she has specialised, as therapist, researcher and trainer, in the challenges faced by those who have experienced coercive, cultic and spiritual abuse.

Description

This is an interactive self-help workbook and psychological road map to enable survivors of coercive, cultic and spiritual abuse to find healing, recovery and growth. This book provides a comprehensive guide to recovery, based on a tested model of post-cult counselling, and years of research and clinical experience. It is designed to help survivors of diverse abusive settings, including religious and spiritual, political, gangs, business, therapy and wellness and one-on-one relationships. The reader follows a beautifully illustrated journey through four Phases of recovery and growth, one Milestone at a time, to make sense of what has happened to them, learn how to walk free from psychological control and find resources for healing. The author includes stories from her own experience, detailing her path towards recovery and how she learned to come to terms with and overcome what happened to her. Written in accessible language, this workbook serves as both a self-help book for survivors and former members, and a guide for therapists working with them.

Table of Contents

Part One: Setting the scene Part Two: Who am I? Part Three: Preparing for the journey Part Four: The Walking Free journey

Region 1: Leave physically so you can begin to recover psychologically Milestone 1: Leaving physically Region 2: Leaving psychologically Milestone 2: Face your doubts Milestone 3: Diagnose your group or relationship Milestone 4: How confluent were you? Milestone 5: Introjects, critical thinking and phobias Milestone 6: Who are YOU? Milestone 7: Understanding traumatic stress Milestone 8: Boundary-setting assertive anger – and rage Milestone 9: Healthy self-love Milestone 10: Thought reform [Lifton] Milestone 11: Recognising other controlling dynamics Milestone 12: Unmasking the leader Region 3: Heal emotionally Milestone 13: Emotional healing Region 4: Walking Free Milestone 14: Reflections Milestone 15: Moving on and Walking Free! Part Five: Seeking therapy Part Six: Advice for therapists

Critics Reviews

‘The world today is experiencing a massive proliferation of destructive cultic groups - religious, political, terrorist, commercial, self-help, healing, recovery, and many other kinds of groups that use deceptive recruitment tactics and coercive control of members. To the very few books meant to help those leaving cults, Dr. Jenkinson adds this comprehensive and essential volume. Having herself traversed the daunting path from traumatic abuse in a cult to freedom and recovery, Dr. Jenkinson offers the reader decades of wisdom gleaned from her therapeutic work with survivors, distilled into this eminently readable and usable volume. Both survivors and therapists alike will welcome and treasure this essential and urgently needed addition to the cult recovery literature.’ Daniel Shaw, psychoanalyst and author of Traumatic Narcissism: Relational Systems of Subjugation and Traumatic Narcissism and Recovery: Leaving the Prison of Shame and Fear

‘Gillie Jenkinson has provided former members and those who counsel them with a unique gift, which will profoundly impact the recovery field. After leaving cult life's cognitive and emotional confusion, Dr. Jenkinson uses the perfect grounding metaphor of a physical journey (with illustrations) to give former cult members a step-by-step ‘psychological roadmap’. Like the best kind of guide, she offers wisdom gained from her own cult experience and her years as a therapist in the cult recovery field. With each step forward, as the ‘fog’ of cult life begins to clear, former members can finally arrive at a place where they gain their authentic identity with a wide range of feelings and a clearer sense of reality. This workbook is a remarkable achievement.’ Lorna Goldberg, LCSW, PsyA, Past President, International Cultic Studies Association and Director, Institute for Psychoanalytic Studies

‘Dr. Gillie Jenkinson is one of the most thoughtful and insightful clinicians in the cultic studies field. In this book, she applies her personal experience and many years of research and clinical work to construct a practical workbook for people leaving cultic groups. This is not simply an explanation of why people join and leave cults. The book provides what would be called ‘homework’ in some counseling approaches. It is interactive and asks ‘participants’ (they are much more than readers) to think and write, to complete forms, to wrestle with their memories, thoughts, and goals for the future. ‘Participating’ in this handbook could be worth thousands of dollars in consultation time. The book is a wonderful resource, especially for those former members who do not have the resources to travel and pay for professional consultation. I recommend it highly.’ Michael D. Langone, PhD, Executive Director, International Cultic Studies Association

‘This is a unique book and should be essential reading. It was forged in the fire of painful experience and refined by a keen mind. Gillie offers a clear pathway enabling others to make their own choices and find their own freedom. It is a remarkable story of personal transformation and hope.’ Alistair Ross, Associate Professor, Psychotherapy, Oxford University

‘Dr. Gillie Jenkinson is a professional I know and trust. Her work has helped in the education, awareness and healing of countless people.’ Steven Hassan, PhD, MA, MEd, LMHC, NCC, Freedom of Mind Resource Center, Inc.

‘This valuable book is a sensitively written, practical guide to cult recovery. Based on her own experiences, first as a former member, and then as a therapist specializing in cult recovery, Dr. Jenkinson shares her knowledge and offers guidance for the difficult process of integrating into the non-cult world in a healthy way.’ Alexandra Stein, PhD, visiting research fellow, London South Bank University

‘There is a new tool to help former cult members and other survivors of abusive groups and relationships, and I will be recommending it to every former cult member who consults with me. In this ground-breaking book, Gillie Jenkinson literally takes her readers on a step-by-step journey to recovery. She doesn’t use jargon and she doesn’t list aspirational goals and leave the ‘how’ to the reader’s imagination. Instead, she offers clear exercises and examples that untangle the process of recovery. The whimsical illustrations help the reader to visualize the recommended steps and invite the reader to participate. I recommend this workbook without reservation.’ Bill Goldberg, clinical social worker and psychoanalyst, formerly Program Supervisor for Rehabilitative Services for Rockland County, New York (retired)

[argentconflagration]

Wishlist!

My surgery is the 19th (a week from tomorrow)! I don't expect anything from anyone, but I definitely would be really happy to get well-wishes on my recovery! And for anyone who wants to get me something, I have put together this wishlist for your convenience. I will reiterate again that I am not expecting anything from anyone! That said, the remainder of this post will be incredibly self-indulgent on my part. You have been warned.

Physical things:

A puzzle. Preferably pretty! You know the things I like: bright colors, math, cats, space, red, plants, etc.

Earphones, if you can find the kind that aren't the little buds in the ear that for some godforsaken reason make up 99% of earphones these days.

Sweets. Here are some things I like: chocolate, cheesecake, ice cream, fruit. However, I am easily overwhelmed by large quantities of sweets so absolutely no need to go overboard on quantity. Also, I probably won't want to eat until ~5 days after the surgery.

Fic:

Homestuck:

My shipping wall is here.

I would love fic focusing on a pale couple, particularly one of the ones below. In general I like fics that put the romance in pale romance, with longing and fluttery feelings and worrying over small gestures--just no makeouts or sex.

Sollux<>Terezi!! The OTP!! I'm love them. Things I like about this ship include: They each have such high expectations of themself, and find it hard to let go of their perceived responsibilities to relax and attend to their own needs. Sollux in particular I see as really awful at taking care of himself (regularly eating, sleeping, showering), but we've seen that Terezi is capable of self-destructive spiraling as well. They each tend to see themselves as responsible for things that aren't their fault, and I think they'd each find it much easier to take care of the other than themself. Conversely, they have a lot of trust in each other's competence--when the chips are down, there's no one they trust more to have their back. I also really enjoy the childhood-friends-to-moirails aspect of the ship, how deeply they know each other, and watching them be incredibly inept at addressing their feelings despite their competence in other areas. They banter a lot, which is fun in its own right, and I also love watching them banter to avoid addressing their feelings for each other (which they inevitably end up having to face).

John|June<>Vriska - Things I like about this ship include: John being able to talk Vriska through her problems in a way that the other people in her life can't, because he has some distance from them. I think it was already a sign of Vriska's character growth that she was able to admit to John both that she killed Tavros and that she was having mixed feelings about it, and I am more interested in seeing Vriska get to make a fresh start through bonding with someone who wasn't involved in her previous history than trying to seek forgiveness from people she's personally hurt. I want to see her be able to grow as a person. And on John's side, I just think it would absolutely rule for him to have a badass who is 8000% ride-or-die, "my moirail deserves the best", in his corner. And, I'm not normally one for post-canon content (frankly even the back half of act 6 is on thin ice), but I loved this post and would be interested to see something building off it. Specifically going with the angle that trolls don't have much of a concept of coercive gender assignment, compared to us, and Vriska being totally comfortable with her transness and able to help June through her process of discovery, while still being super traumatized by stuff that June is able to help her through from her own perspective.

Kanaya<>Karkat - Things I like about this ship include: Them relying on each other / retreating to each other in times of great distress. Kanaya being attracted to dangerous situations, and Karkat grounding her and being her voice of reason. Them being dorks over their trashy romance novels together, and having long, involved discussions about why the characters are perfect for each other. Kanaya feeding from Karkat, and the trust that demonstrates.

Folykl<>Kuprum - I have a headcanon post for them here. Things I like about this ship include: The fact that they are gross and awful people who genuinely love each other. They're crass, they're mutually (and consensually) assholes to each other, they really do love each other.

The Locked Tomb:

Camilla<>Palamedes (as a crossover, or as some variety of queerplatonic relationship) - I like their utter devotion to each other and utter trust in each other's competence. I will have read Nona the Ninth and will be interested in stuff that builds off the Calamedes relationship development from that book.

Gideon/Harrow/Alecto - Harrow has two hands! Obviously there are a lot of different ways you could take the Alecto characterization, but I guess my headcanon for now is that she finds things like kissing and sex totally incomprehensible, is probably neurodivergent in the extreme, but she absolutely does love Harrow enough to haunt her and protect her however she can. And maybe that's something Gideon can come to respect or even love. Mostly I just want to see them all together in any way.

Locked Tomb / Homestuck crossover:

There is currently ONE crossover between TLT and HS on AO3, and I think that's a tragedy. Here are some things I'd like to see:

Locked Tomb characters as trolls so that they can have quadrants: Gideon♠️ Harrow, Camilla♦️Palamedes, Augustine♠️ Mercymorn (edited bc tumblr stole my quadrant symbols D:<)

Homestuck characters going through the Lyctoral trials at Canaan House. I just think it'd be a fun concept. Pair them up. Traumatize them in new and exciting ways. Fuck, I just thought of Terezi and Sollux as necro and cav, and now my heart is doing things.

Art:

I have this image in my head of Tavros, still paralyzed, on a climbing wall, able to make it to the top with just his arms. Maybe he has one hand on the top of the wall and the other hand in a fist pump, and he's just so genuinely happy.

Thank you again for reading all this!

[heavyweightheart]

It’s wild that in the eating disorders field we use the language of “disorder” w its implication of abnormality when we know damn well that disorder around food and body image is the norm—not only the norm in that most people experience it but the norm in a coercive sense... a dictate that’s enforced institutionally, in the family, in school, in medicine, in media, literally everywhere. It’s recovery from or resistance to diet cultural norms that’s abnormal, countercultural, contrary to overwhelming public messaging and demands re: health and bodies.

[ex-cogtfi]

Have you ever been in a toxic relationship or environment where you were fed the narrative that someone significant (an ex, outsiders, professionals, relatives, others...) was evil, twisted, and not to be trusted? When you're in that environment it's very easy to believe what you're told about others because the information usually comes from someone in a position of control over you and you usually have an emotional attachment.

When you're immersed in a coercive control environment like a cult or an abusive relationship it's hard to think straight as you're rarely allowed to question... When your caregivers and all those you love say the same thing you believe it. After all they can't all be wrong can they? And besides why would they lie... You trust them don't you?

Starting to question the basic things you've always been told and doubt what you've always been taught is scary! It can feel like a betrayal of everything you've ever known and the emotional toll it takes can be overwhelming! Starting to question however is an essential part of recovery from these environments and, although it's emotionally tough, it can be so rewarding!

This post 'My Grandparents' by an anonymous survivor from 'The Family International' cult shares her experience of that first moment that she questioned the narrative she was raised with and discovered that there was kindness in the world where she least expected it.

Please read, share, and comment about some of your 'firsts' and anything you may find relatable...

[religion-is-a-mental-illness]

I actually agreed with many of your points in the past and appreciate your perspective on religion, but I draw the line on your most recent post about trigger warnings being supposedly "unhelpful" for trauma survivors. This simply isn't true- if it weren't for trigger warnings in things like fanfiction or Tumblr posts, I, as a sexual assault survivor, would end up reading content that would aggravate my PTSD on days where I couldn't handle it. Trigger warnings are just as important for victims of religious trauma, as well. I'm not just speaking from a personal perspective- I know so many people who need tags for certain content and deliberately not tagging things for them because of a study like this is inherently wrong.

Sorry to put this in two asks instead of just one and cluttering your inbox, but I forgot to mention- I have severe PTSD and trigger warnings actually help me. They way you phrased your comment on the post about trigger warnings was beyond insensitive, and while religion deserves your insensitivity, trauma survivors don't.

What you're asking is for me to stick to the reality of imaginary gods, while denying the reality of how human psychology works. You want me to cater to your preferred reality denial, but not that of a believer.

I don't care if you find the reality of trigger warnings "insensitive." Xians find my criticism of their religion "insensitive" and it doesn't bother you that I proceed anyway.

Your objection is inconsistent.

https://yourlogicalfallacyis.com/special-pleading

More importantly, your objection is harmful to people who have experienced trauma.

deliberately not tagging things for them because of a study like this is inherently wrong.

No, it's uncomfortable, not wrong. There’s a difference. You framing your issues and your mental wellbeing as everyone else's moral and ethical obligation is actually wrong. “Saying something that upsets me is inherently wrong,” is functionally the same logic as blasphemy laws. It’s the exact reason we’re told we’re not allowed to draw pictures of Muhammad.

It's manipulative and coercive. I would even go so far as to say abusive. Because it's eerily similar to someone tiptoeing around their own house because saying the wrong thing, eating too loudly, wearing the wrong color clothes could trigger their partner into flying off the handle. "You know how I get; why do you make me do this to you?”

If you’re not well enough to handle the arbitrary randomness of the internet, then why are you even here? “Well, I’m allowed to be.” So am I. But your position is that I need to regard you as the lowest common denominator.

I say this completely without judgement: your issues are a flaw with your own mental processes, with emotional resilience, with inaccurate perceptions of threat and safety. And this is not without a good reason, because of what happened to you, what you went through. But they’re not a flaw in reality. So altering the reality around you does not address where the problem lies. It simply deflects it onto others.

If your mental health is beholden to other people, then you are setting yourself up for failure. And I suspect you're doing that intentionally, because to take responsibility for your recovery is difficult and scary.

And I get that it is. I get that it means re-opening old wounds, revisiting what happened. Making it heart-stabbingly real by having it spoken aloud.

But I will not relieve you of the work you need to do to recover. I will not take responsibility for your ability to cope. It is unfair of you to demand so of me, just as it's unfair of you to demand it of others.

while religion deserves your insensitivity, trauma survivors don't.

Here's the thing: this is the nicest thing I can do for you. To not treat you like the fragile creature you imagine yourself to be. I can have empathy for you and still tell you to go to see someone and sort things out.

Honestly. Fearlessly. To, assisted by the right kind of help, confront the feelings and the problem head-on, to learn new skills and tools that actually are healthy (e.g. Cognitive Behavioral Therapy), and emerge on the other side victorious.

"Think of resilience like a muscle. It’s *meant* to be used. If instead of using & strengthening your muscles you were very carefully carried around all the time- they will atrophy. The good news is: like, your muscles, resilience can be developed."

-- @seerutkchawla

The same way I tell Xians to sort out their issues rather than medicating themselves with nonsense about gods to alleviate their fear of death.

My humanity tells me that I want you to get better, to work hard, to overcome, rather than having your issues reinforced and affirmed.

I will not reinforce helplessness. I will not pat you on the head and whisper in your ear that we will tiptoe around you. I will tell you that you went through something, that it was painful, and I'm sorry for that.

Now, what are you going to do to move forward? What is your plan to get better? If your plan is that everybody will speak in hushed tones, avoid using valid language and terms, and there are things that will just eternally be off limits around you, then you've given up on life.

I will not endorse that. I will not endorse surrender and capitulation to the dictatorship of fear.

"Coddling is not love. It’s incapacitation- the psychological form of foot binding. It’s subliminally communicating: ‘you are incapable, fragile, weak but very special’. This is not love, it is the devouring mother."

-- @seerutkchawla

You may be pissed off with me, but I'm fine with that. i will tell you what you need to hear, not what you want to hear. You may find it insensitive, but I don't care. I will not treat you as an incapable, fragile victim. Because that's what trigger warnings do.

The work and studies on psychology, PTSD, trauma and trigger warnings are clear. Trigger warnings do not work. They are the opposite approach to delivering improved mental health, and originate from the self-diagnosis trend. The mistaken belief that you can know yourself as a biological and neurological organism better than a trained professional who has studied the subject objectively.

==

Here is a post where I reference a half dozen articles and studies relating to to the subject:

https://religion-is-a-mental-illness.tumblr.com/post/633326334042669056

I'm going to quote some of the most important points here:

==

The original “The Coddling of the American Mind” article goes into the actual psychology of trigger warnings:

[..] there is a deeper problem with trigger warnings. According to the most-basic tenets of psychology, the very idea of helping people with anxiety disorders avoid the things they fear is misguided. A person who is trapped in an elevator during a power outage may panic and think she is going to die. That frightening experience can change neural connections in her amygdala, leading to an elevator phobia. If you want this woman to retain her fear for life, you should help her avoid elevators.

But if you want to help her return to normalcy, you should take your cues from Ivan Pavlov and guide her through a process known as exposure therapy. You might start by asking the woman to merely look at an elevator from a distance—standing in a building lobby, perhaps—until her apprehension begins to subside. If nothing bad happens while she’s standing in the lobby—if the fear is not “reinforced”—then she will begin to learn a new association: elevators are not dangerous. (This reduction in fear during exposure is called habituation.) Then, on subsequent days, you might ask her to get closer, and on later days to push the call button, and eventually to step in and go up one floor. This is how the amygdala can get rewired again to associate a previously feared situation with safety or normalcy.

==

From https://pubmed.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov/30843709/:

We meta-analyzed the results of 5 experiments (N = 1,600) conducted online, and found that trigger warnings did not cause participants to interpret the photos in a more negative manner than participants who were unwarned. However, warned participants experienced a negative anticipatory period prior to photo viewing that did little to mitigate subsequent negative reactions.

==

From: https://www.usnews.com/news/health-news/articles/2020-06-16/trigger-warnings-may-do-more-harm-than-good-study-finds

“We found that trigger warnings did not help trauma survivors brace themselves to face potentially upsetting content,” said lead researcher Payton Jones, a doctoral candidate in clinical psychology at Harvard University. “In some cases, they made things worse.”

Trigger warnings seem to increase the extent to which people see trauma as central to their identity, which can exacerbate cases of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) in the long run, Jones and his colleagues found.

“We found evidence that trigger warnings increased the extent to which trauma survivors saw their worst event as central to their life story,” Jones said. “Seeing trauma as central to one’s life is not a good thing.”

==

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BwMeZLh1C8E

“A response that the Atlantic got that absolutely nearly brought me to tears, that I just thought was so beautiful was someone talking about the fact that she lost her sister, she committed suicide by jumping off of a building. And she relayed the story of that being covered in class and in a fictional work in which that’s the way a character kills himself. And there was no trigger warning, there was no preparation for it, and it was the first time she had felt normal in years. And that that meant the world to her, to actually just be treated like everybody else.”

-- Greg Lukianoff

==

"Celebrating victimhood is a great way to incentivise not wanting to overcome it. Empathy & support, yes. Celebration, no."

-- @seerutkchawla

The empathy I have for you and your situation, one that nobody should have to go through, is best served by me cheering you on as you do the work, the actual, hard-to-do, challenging, confronting work to overcome what has happened to you. To do what is right, not that which is on the path of least resistance.

That it bothers me more that you would give up and accept defeat than that you might be mad at me.

To tell you that I believe in you, that you can do this.

That you can, and deserve to, live a happy life without the constant fear of emotional annihilation.

==

More:

https://religion-is-a-mental-illness.tumblr.com/tagged/trigger-warnings

https://religion-is-a-mental-illness.tumblr.com/tagged/PTSD

https://religion-is-a-mental-illness.tumblr.com/tagged/Cognitive-Behavioral-Therapy

https://religion-is-a-mental-illness.tumblr.com/tagged/religious-trauma-syndrome

https://religion-is-a-mental-illness.tumblr.com/tagged/human-psychology

https://religion-is-a-mental-illness.tumblr.com/tagged/Seerut-Chawla

[outofangband]

Hello!! About how long do you hc it took for Maedhros to recover after Angband? And do you hc that he spent all his recovery time with Fingolfin's camp, or do you think he moved back to the Fëanorian one after a while?

(for more information feel free to look through my Post Angband tag)

Hi anon! It depends on what you mean by recover! There were many different stages to his healing over a period of many years.

I’m actually writing some fics and posts that deal with more clinical and medical information now about the physical recovery so I’m excited for that too <3

There was a period of about a week in the very beginning where he had next to no lucidity or awareness of his surroundings, was delirious and moved between sleep and dream in a state of near constant distress. He switched between fighting the healers and periods of catatonia. 

His awareness of his surroundings grows but he has not abandoned any of the habits he has learned in Angband, or his strategies of survival. 

At some point his survival strategies, probably stop becoming mainly the habits that he learned within the fortress, and more of those that he used in the beginning to survive in an unfamiliar and hostile place, even though he is around familiar people 

It was probably about two weeks before he was able to leave bed without help and several more before he could walk with a cane for any distance. I talked a lot before about the extensive damage that enforced immobility caused, the healing from that was likely some of the most grueling.

It was over a year before he regained significant motor skills in his limbs and took extensive physical and occupational therapy that he would have to practice for many years after to maintain strength. 

More detail work, agility training, and fine motor skills he would start focusing on after perhaps six months though he made several attempts before. 

Maedhros spends a few months in Fingolfin’s camp before returning to his family’s.  At this point he is able to walk short distances without a cane or other mobility device but finds it both easier and more comfortable to use them. He has braces on his legs still and has not yet regained full strength but is not quite as gaunt as he had been. Most of the worst of the non scarred wounds he arrived with have been addressed and no longer require much maintenance. 

And of course this doesn't get into psychological and emotional recovery. It's harder to give a timeline for that unless it was from the point of view of others which obviously wouldn't paint a full or even very detailed picture of Maedhros's actual condition, only how he presents it.

For the first month especially he has significant doubts about his reality. These do not fully disappear for a long time and until the end of his life he will occasionally have moments of unreality or derealization where he has a dizzying spell of uncertainty. 

He does a lot of masking. Angband requires adaptation to a brutal environment (information about here) and as I have quoted “the personality formed in an environment of coercive control is not suited to adult life”. Maedhros learns that the skills he acquired in Angband are met with anything from pity and concern to anger, disdain, and suspicion outside of the fortress. He forces down and hides what he can, despite the at times physical panic he feels to act upon certain instincts that are ingrained in him (my fics Fealty and Appeasement go into some more blatant examples of this but there are a wide variety of subtler behaviors and habits too)

Let me know if you have more questions! This is obviously a favorite topic of mine

[katrinapavela]

If you feel like answering re your last post - what would you say the main difference is between Olivia saying "I'm the problem" at the end of s3 and her saying "I'm the problem" in the series finale? (If you think it's different) It's something that I've been struggling to find meaning in since the series ended, and your take on it is making me think of it differently

Hi 👋🏾. Sure, I’ll answer this because the difference between Olivia’s ‘I am the problem’ speeches of 3x18 and 7x18 is simple but profound: accountability. The final episode has it; S3’s finale does not. If we think about the ongoing theme of addiction in the series and view ‘power’ as a drug (S7 intervention anyone?!), the first rule of any 12 step recovery programme is admitting there’s a problem and one’s powerlessness over the addiction (or words to that effect).

I shall explain:

3X18 seems sacrificial (I’m at the centre! I’m the eye of the storm, everyone’s suffered because of me). But Olivia immediately pivots to ultimate fixer mode: “I’m doing what I do best. I’m fixing it.” Her solution is to flee. This is not taking accountability for her actions. This is Olivia using herself as the ultimate power broker of a crisis by taking herself as a chess piece off the board. In effect this act of hers is just denial’s good friend: escapism.

All of this makes sense if you consider the audience of the speeches in both episodes. 3x18 sees Olivia expressing all of this to Jake, who is not there by invitation. I’ve written many times before w/r/t Jake being symbolic of Olivia’s need to escape various forms of denial in her life. In 3x18, he offers himself as a travel companion, and an alternative love (“you’re leaving everything else behind, leave [your love for Fitz] behind, too). What we glimpsed in 4x01 supports this as Olivia was literally living out an escapist fantasy where she was a different person:Julia.

By contrast, 7X18 comes after several episodes in which Olivia has tried making amends, tempted but pulling back on addiction triggers and trying to do the right thing. Her recognition in the finale is about the fact that she can’t really ‘fix’ things and that she’s had a coercive power over other people’s lives, people she cares about. That’s about taking responsibility and reckoning with how the impact of one’s actions can have a concentric effect. And who is her audience for this: Fitzgerald Grant. Just as I have written of Jake, I have also written of Fitz being symbolic of something truthful Olivia needed to embrace —for the sake of herself. What we see Olivia do after that scene supports my argument. By denying Mellie’s request to come back to the WH, Olivia puts her wellness first and let’s other people figure out their own challenges (which Mellie BEEN needed to do😒). And from there she meets up with her main support system: Fitz.

Hope that clarifies and answers your question.

[unwelcome-ozian]

can mind control be done outside of strictly tbmc? being lied to and manipulated was a big part of my abuse and how the perpetrator was able to harm me so extensively. it was an intentional effort to hurt me, control me, and get me to behave the way they wanted. i've been told by other systems that this would count as mind control, but i don't want to overstep and claim to be part of a group when i'm really not...

Hello.  I can understand how the application of the term “mind control” can be confusing.  Abusers usually abuse with intent, and they will manipulate and control their victims because they want to abuse and not get caught.  In this sense, all victims of abuse have been controlled by the abuser; however, all abuse is not typically labeled with the term “mind control”. 

The way we use the term “mind control” on this blog or what would be considered “mind control” in many groups of RAMCOA survivors would fall under trauma based mind control that is perpetrated by cults, the government,  organizations, occult groups, or other high-control groups.  More information regarding RAMCOA definitions can be found here.

Narcissistic abuse (information here) or coercive control (information here )describe types of abuse that are often experienced by both survivors of RAMCOA and survivors of single perpetrator abuse or abuse by perpetrators who were not connected to a group or organization. In a sense the emotional abuse that takes place with narcissistic abuse has effects similar to brainwashing or indoctrinations that would take place in a more organized way when the perpetration is tied to abuse within a group. (More information here. How we use the term "mind control" to describe abuse that is more organized and is usually perpetrated by groups of people does not minimize the impact of abuse that does not fall under this umbrella.

Broader terms that describe controlling abuse may include  abuse, emotional abuse, child abuse, sexual abuse, child sexual abuse.  All people who have lived through abuse are survivors of abuse.  If you are wanting to actually participate in a group specific to survivors of “mind control”, it might be good to ask how they are using the term to see if it covers your experience.    

All this being said, we are not here to police how other people use terms to describe their abuse.  This tumblr is not a group, so anyone is welcome to follow and use the information to their benefit.   Often people are in the process of understanding their abuse.  You will notice that we post regarding a variety of different aspects of abuse, and much of our posts describe trauma responses and trauma effects that are common to all survivors.  Even though the tumblr is intended to help survivors of TBMC, Cults, Occult practices, and other abusive organizations (and those who support survivors), anyone is welcome to use any information here that may be helpful in their healing journey.  

~Josha

[if-you-fan-a-fire]

“Winnipeg’s Canadian War Disability Pensioners’ Association (CWDPA) formed in December 1932 in the wake of the relief cut. With 7,446 pensioners in Manitoba and 1,169 in the provincial capital, by May 1933 the CWDPA boasted 800 Winnipeg members. The CWDPA facilitated the creation of and affiliated with pensioner bodies in other urban centres—by 1937, their combined membership totalled 22,000 out of approximately 80,000 Canadian pensioners. Whereas the Legion’s motto, coined by Canadian Corps Commander, Lieutenant-General Arthur Currie, stressed the honour of continued service—“They served till deat —why not we?”—Canada’s pensioner associations adopted the Three Musketeers’ slogan of solidarity—“all for one, and one for all.” As Craig Heron has suggested, it was “comradeship,” the common cause of protecting their rights, and “a belief in collectivist social responsibility and a challenge to any vested interests that threatened the common good,” that brought veterans, like those within the CWDPA, together.

The CWDPA’s political activity revolved around Deer Lodge Hospital. Military hospitals are the “locus classicus of the disabled veteran’s identity,” according to international historian David A. Gerber. It was within these rehabilitative institutions that disabled veterans “developed intense interpersonal relationships,” and formed “self-conscious groups” and “formal organizations.” The “disparity between rehabilitation propaganda and the reality of disability,” provided the backdrop for individual acts of resistance in US institutions, reveals Ana Carden-Coyne; “neither grateful nor compliant,” many US and Canadian disabled veterans rejected the coercive, authoritarian, and infantilizing aspects of military hospitals. Beneath the dominant portrayal of harmony between medical staff and disabled veterans there seethed an animosity and rebuke of the efficacy and promise of rehabilitation.

One of eight Canadian veterans’ hospitals, Deer Lodge was also the DPNH’s administrative centre in Manitoba. Formerly a hotel, the lodge was managed by Major John Payson Oliver, a civil engineer and military officer. Located in Silver Heights, St. James municipality, six kilometres west of downtown Winnipeg on Portage Avenue, the three-storey, Tudor-revival lodge resembled a bucolic English inn, with latticed windows, exposed beams, and a wraparound verandah. The building was surrounded by landscaped gardens, stately oaks and maples, and overlooked the Assiniboine River. During the 1930s the Lodge typically housed up to 150 veterans and admitted an average of 1,074 patients a year. Pensioners convalesced, sought medical aid, collected their pensions and relief, and died at Deer Lodge. The CWDPA recruited patients to the association and regularly gathered in lodge halls. As in the US, the CWDPA’s emergence within Deer Lodge was a collective manifestation of disabled veterans’ indictment on the limits of the modern science of rehabilitation and its welfare apparatus; government interventions had not helped all war survivors to “move on.”

Samuel Sykes, CWDPA president from 1933 to 1937, was no stranger to Deer Lodge. A carpenter by trade, Sykes enlisted in February 1916. At Vimy Ridge, a piece of shrapnel entered behind Sykes left ear, broke his upper jaw and exited below his right eye. For 17 months, Sykes ate food through a straw. During his recovery at Deer Lodge, Sykes survived influenza; his wife and two-year-old daughter did not. Radicalized by his hospitalization, family tragedy, and the postwar depression, Sykes emerged as a One Big Union (OBU) radical. As a labour activist, Sykes organized barbers, retail clerks, and meat packers, and represented streetcar employees Sykes’s antiwar and socialist leanings coloured CWDPA initiatives. At a 1925 Armistice gathering, Sykes “drew a vivid picture of conditions … on the battlefields.” And for what?, Sykes asked. A country full of “half-starved widows and children?” Cenotaphs, charged Sykes, only “cover up the treachery of the capitalist system.” That same year, representing Winnipeg’s unemployed at city hall, Sykes blamed poverty on the exploitation of the “master class.” “Why don’t you go to Russia where you haven’t got capitalism?,” interrupted a city councillor. In a socialist subversion of Anglo-Canadian nationalism, Sykes retorted, “Because I speak English and don’t come from Russia.” Sykes jumped ship from the OBU to the CWDPA after the union became embroiled in controversy for promoting an illegal newspaper sweepstakes. Within the CWDPA, socialist “Commandant” Sykes found that a violated moral economy offered a gateway to veteran radicalism. Sykes belongs in the ever-widening pantheon of interwar leftists who do not fit neatly into the Communist Party of Canada (CPC) versus Co-operative Commonwealth Federation (CCF) paradigm.

Although more militant than the Legion or the right-leaning Army and Navy Veterans, pensioner associations competed with the Communist Workers’ Ex-Servicemen’s League (WESL). WESL’s as many as 40,000 members nationwide acted as a bulwark against Legionnaire anti-Red and anti-labour vigilantism and insisted on the indivisibility of all workers, regardless of war service. With WESL’s first chapter, and eventually its national headquarters in Winnipeg, Manitoba’s capital was a hotbed of radical veterans’ politics. Where WESL’s leadership raised “a radical awareness of capitalist exploitation and a commitment to revolutionary transformation” among working-class veterans, the CWDPA also nudged war survivors to spurn “bourgeois leadership” and move beyond the “quiescent loyalty” demanded by the Legion and the Canadian state.

Invading their turf, Sykes and the CWDPA faced Communist scorn as the CPC fitfully emerged from its sectarian “Third Period,” wherein it lambasted other leftists as enemies of the revolutionary movement. Some CWDPA members, like Captain William Talbot, returned arrows in anti-Red harangues despite sharing many of WESL’s immediate objectives. In 1933, as the CPC tempered its isolationism with tepid calls for a “united front,” the CWDPA and WESL formed an alliance in the short-lived United Council of Veterans. 

With Sykes as the chair, the United Council demanded the restoration of the 1932 pension rates, an overhaul of pension administration, free medical attention, 100% pension rate allowances for “burnt-out” veterans and those over 50 years old, and federal relief for all unemployed ex-soldiers. The United Council moved that all relief and pensions be paid from “government military appropriations and the interest on war debts.” Leo Carson, one-time CWDPA vice president, was one of the association’s more outspoken Communist supporters. Seeing “no reason why one who has served his country should come back to Canada the land of plenty and starve,” Carson, a Great War conscript, was among the leftists injured during the June 1934 battle in Winnipeg’s market square against local fascists

On the eve of the Deer Lodge siege, the CWDPA extended their “moral and sympathetic” support to the communist-led On-to-Ottawa trek. In turn, Vancouver’s WESL branches sent letters of solidarity to the Deer Lodge occupiers. This was hardly a surprise as they frequently targeted the Vancouver Shaughnessy Veterans’ Hospital as a site of protest. Communism, in the minds of many interlopers, was much more about tactics than a revolutionary endgame. Deer Lodge camper and ex-corporal Frank Skidmore, a victim of shell shock and a gunshot wound to his face, wrote to the Winnipeg Tribune to declare that it was high time veterans became “communistic” and stage “a mass protest from coast to coast.” Although clearly not run by Communists, on the ground and in the matter of immediate aims and strategy, the CWDPA shared much with Red-inclined Great War survivors

The CWDPA also aligned with the labour movement. Several directors were prominent union leaders. The association critiqued capitalists for excluding disabled veterans from the workforce, employing only able-bodied labourers to “satisfy … their struggle for markets and cash surpluses.” They also protested the misuse of pensioners’ labour by the state. In 1933, the association grieved the “exploitation” of unpaid convalescents who worked part time at Deer Lodge Hospital. These pensioners feared their relief would be cut off should they refuse. In other remonstrations, the association called for the dismissal of Deer Lodge administrators and for the Lodge to be placed under veterans’ democratic control.

The CWDPA’s progressive and inclusive mandate really shone in its interventions on public health and poverty. Throughout the 1930s, the CWDPA grieved the DPNH’s jurisdictional refusal to provide pensioners’ families with health care. Winnipeg granted free medical provisions for its relief recipients in 1934, but pensioners’ families were denied treatment. Ottawa refused to offer the same to veterans on relief. A CWDPA march to the Manitoba legislature in September 1934 calling for family medical treatment won sympathy from the province. The Winnipeg Free Press accused Ottawa of either “callous indifference or the inexcusable entanglements of red tape.” 

In December 1934, tragedy struck. H. D. Brittain, former vice president of the CWDPA, lost his five-year-old son Billie to pneumonia. Ex-private Brittain, thrice wounded before a gas attack ended his four years of war service, had postponed a call to the doctor to seek treatment for Billie until he had received his $26 monthly pension. “Why should a war veteran have to ask for charity?” asked the unemployed calendar salesman. In an antiwar and anti-capitalist rebuke, the CWDPA, in its newspaper, The Pensioner, noted the government’s wartime ability to spend “millions of dollars for instruments of death and destruction” and on hospitals to “patch” them up to send them “back to the slaughter,” but it now “refuses to spend a nickel” for medical care for veterans’ children. If “resurrection were possible,” the dead in France would “cry aloud for vengeance at this betrayal of the things for which they fought and died.” Canada keeps its promises to the bondholders, but not, wrote the organization, to its veterans.”

- David Thompson, “Convalescent Comrades: The 1935 Siege of Winnipeg’s Deer Lodge Hospital,” Histoire sociale / Social History, Volume 54, Numéro/Number 110, Mai/May 2021. p. 79-84.

Image is from article. CWDPA 1934 March to Manitoba Legislature. Talbot is the wreath bearer. Source: “Pensioners Remember Those ‘Over There,’” Winnipeg Tribune, September 10, 1934, p. 8.

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

I am struggling with my new life after abuse. I would love some advice from those who have succeeded to guide or give me hope I can actually do this. 13 years of marriage, I was a housewife under abusive coercive control. It turned me into a weak and broken down person. Three special needs kids are in my hands and I have to support us all. We're in a safe home for a limited time, till I finish school.

We're all in therapy and we're all in school. 3rd grade, 5th grade, 10th grade, and I'm working and doing online school so I can get a good job. I have CPTSD. I have memory loss, lost time, and reduced short term memory retention on top of the expected panic, anxiety, depression, disassociation, and hoplessness. I have to learn. When I sit down to read and study I can't remember anything. None of the multiple choice answers include "you'll never make it, you're a fool, he may have been mean but he had a good job"... But that's the only answer that I've got in my head. I have to restart a life when I don't believe I can.

How do I make the new information stick in my head instead of his voice that always kept me down?

Dillerd

Hey Dillerd,

It makes sense that you're struggling. Please be kind and compassionate toward yourself. None of this is easy, what you're going through. Recognize how hard it is to restart your life and support your family.

It takes time to rework your thoughts and beliefs about yourself and your self-esteem. After years of abuse, your brain has learned how to behave. Be patient, but persistent with yourself. Remind yourself that you are not a fool. You don't need him. You're going to be a successful, happy, and healthy woman without him.

Write some affirmations that resonate with you and paste them where you'll see them everyday. Each day, look at yourself in the mirror and give yourself 5 compliments, both physical and mental. Remind yourself of who you are. You are a strong, capable, worthy person. Here are some affirmations for people who have left abuse.

Work on your support network. Reach out to friends, make plans, and talk to them. Having someone to talk to in a time like this can make a big impact.

Focus on yourself and your self care. Eat, drink, and exercise enough. Write in a journal and allow yourself to vent, let all of your thoughts and emotions out, without judgement. Surround yourself with positive messages regarding boundaries and relationships, such as Love is Respect. Follow accounts that encourage self-compassion, high self-esteem, and self-respect.

Before you study, make sure you're feeling calm and regulated. It's incredibly hard to learn when scared or elevated. Make sure you have a good study area, and everything (that you can control) is optimal. The more you recovery, process, and heal, the easier it will be to concentrate. Sometimes when we leave an abusive situation, we are able to express everything we had previously been forced to suppress. It's a lot to process, and you may be overwhelmed now that you're able to think about it all. Please go easy on yourself and give yourself patience. I know you want to get everything together and undergo changes for a positive future, but rushing it will make it more difficult.

Wishing you well.

- Misa

[livethinking]

Toni Morrison: «Memory meant recollecting the told story», II part

Magic as cultural device for the construction of collective memory

The recollection of West African tradition and the addition of elements inside the narration are another way to build the collective memory, where the African culture becomes a common ground in which sharing meanings, and also an instrument of resistance against dehumanisation. As the slave-owning people tried to deny the humanity of Black people, the latter communicated, resisted and strengthened each others maintaining the practice of their culture. This recovery, as orality in Toni Morrison’s works, is translated also as the addition of magical or supernatural elements of African cultures; «Morrison seeks to address this insecurity by creating an African American cultural memory with her readership through mutual acts of the imagination. In order to achieve this her writing encourages the imaginative participation of the reader in the text through oral storytelling techniques and, despite Morrison's disclaimer, through magic realist devices»[8]. The magic element is connected to the oral tradition to which Morrison referred, because both orality and the supernatural element represent modalities of transmission of her tradition; indeed, «Morrison's two most notable novels, Beloved (1987) and Song of Solomon (1977), both contain magic realist elements which can be traced to African American myth and both novels focus on the importance of the role of memory in oral tradition to perpetuate African American culture»[9].

In particular, ghost stories and the image of the revenant, both present in oral African tradition and recovered by the Afroamerican one, are more relevant in Morrison’s works and these elements are the ones that collect that sense of connection with the past, the relations between being here and now and memory, a process that creates the collective identity from that history shared by the individuals, by the personal experiences to the common destiny of a collectivity. This happens in her most notable novel, Beloved, where the young girl murdered by her mother comes back as a ghost, as a revenant, a spectre from the past and recollection of memory, of traumas, the personal and shared ones. The tragedy of death, of negation of the self, the horror of slavery and of dehumanisation. «The use of a revenant for this story set during the specific historical period of the end of slavery and the reconstruction era is especially poignant. Eugene Genovese notes that during slavery ghost stories were prevalent on plantations and was one way in which elements of African tradition were retained»[10]. The magic element, and in particular ghost stories, has got a double role in the recovery of cultural issues, i.e. the reversal of coercive elements and the reappropriation of cultural images that were confiscated by owning-slave individuals to culturally oppress slaves. «As Fry explains, one means of control over slaves was for the master to create and spread a ghost story set in an area that was difficult to patrol […]. Through this method the master attempted to increase his control over the slaves by appropriating the transmutable force of a ghostly presence»[11]. Also in Toni Morrison, memory becomes a way to resiste culturally and to affirms the personal identity, as well as liberation from the hegemony perpetrated by white people and from oppression, using the alternative cultural reference and recollect those which were transformed into an instrument of control. Indeed, «the use of a ghost in Beloved – whose ultimate effect in the novel is to draw a community together for self-healing and protection - can be seen as a creative act of resistance to such attempts at control in slave history whilst appropriating the very power associated with ghosts for subversive purposes»[12]. But not only this. The use of ghosts in Beloved has also a negative quality, and so not just this of recovery. The ghost can be defined also as a threatening and negative figure, able to bring chaos, fear and division in the community; it’s the image of a dead that is back, the trauma that comes back to haunt. «Morrison establishes Beloved as a ghost in specifically African American terms and in doing so she brings the symbolism associated with the Ku Klux Klan into a familiar realm where it may be controlled»[13]. The reference to Ku Klux Klan means also the return of a violent past, of oppression, of discrimination. The history of slavery coming back to haunt, to scare and the racism of a certain political wing, racist declarations and action return. And recollect certain images, make them inoffensive, is a way to resist, an example of social response, whose purpose is to heal the trauma of an entire community, which is still dealing with the ghosts of the past. In Beloved, the ghost is «the past, and that part of the past which she represents is the internalised selfhatred by African Americans due to persistent racism against them. Sethe's coming to terms with her past is in part a coming to terms with her own self-hatred which she insists that Denver avoids»[14].

From the piece to the wholeness: memory as a creative process

«Memory, then, no matter how small the piece remembered, demands my respect, my attention, and my trust. I depend heavily on the rude of memory […] because it ignites me some process of invention»[15].

Toni Morrison, Memory, Creation and Writing

We’re almost at the conclusion, with another aspect of memory in Toni Morrison’s work, as it was unveiled by her in the magnificent essay Memory, Creation and Writing, about the memory as a creative process. It’s the memory itself, a fragment of reality showing up in the consciousness, a drop of reality, a revived moment, the perception of something that had been which trigger the creative language of Toni Morrison, that creates narrations, stories, characters she tells about in her books. A fragment to create the wholeness, one memory, or better, what this memory brings in mind emotionally. «The pieces (and only the pieces) are what begin the creative process. And the process by which the recollections of these pieces coalesce into a part (and knowing the difference between a piece and a part) is creation»[16]. This makes clear how much permeated is memory in her works, because this one is the origin of creation, but also what gives meaning to the story, what confers a common sense, signifies and orders the world. It means give a sense. A sense to life, to the past, to the horror, to trauma. It means order the present. And giving a meaning is to connect, as Toni Morrison connects pieces, memories, to create the wholeness, a picture that has a sign, that creates a pairing of figured to make it a different, unique one, transformed in it wholeness. It’s the narration that «is one of the ways in which knowledge is organized […] the most important way to transmit and receive knowledge»[17]. Memory is transmission, is the recovery of identities, is to call ourselves, recognising the Other, what has never been, because last is a lesson, is the path that lead us here and it’s the events that shaped us, and only remembering we can give a meaning to what we will remember. Thus, memory means to tell, is an epiphanic process, of realisation, that provokes the creation of a image. And it’s from this that Toni Morrison creates, because «memory meant recollecting the told story»[18].

First part here

Viviana Rizzo @livethinking

Reference

1. DAVIS, Christina, “Interview with Toni Morrison”, in Présence Africaine, 1er trimestre 1988, no. 145, p. 143

2. MORRISON, Toni, “The Site of Memory”, in Inventing the Truth: The Art and Craft of Memoir, Boston, Ed. William Zinsser, 1995 (2nd edition), p. 92

3. DAVIS, Christina, “Interview with Toni Morrison”, p. 143

4. NISHIKAWA, Kinohi, “Morrison’s Things: Between History and Memory”, in Arcade. Literature, the Humanities & the World, web, arcade.stanford.edu, 2021 (https://arcade.stanford.edu/content/morrison’s-things-between-history-and-memory)

5. LANIER, Adrienne & TALLY, Justine “Toni Morrison, Memory and Meaning”, in miscelánea: a journal of English and American studies, 52 (2015), p. 155

6. ONG, J. Walter, Orality and Literacy. The Technologizing of the Word, New York, Routledge, 2002, pp. 133-134

7. BOWERS, Maggie A., “Acknowledging ambivalence: The creation of communal memory in the writing of Toni Morrison”, in Wasafiri 13:27(1998), p. 21

8. Ivi, p. 19

9. Ibidem

10. Ivi, p. 21

11. Ivi, p. 22

12. Ibidem

13. Ibidem

14. Ibidem

15. MORRISON, Toni, “Memory, Creation, and Writing”, in Thoughts, vol. 59, no. 235 (December 1984), p. 386

16. Ibidem

17. Ivi, p. 388

18. Ivi, p. 389

Sources

1. BOWERS, Maggie Ann, “Acknowledging ambivalence: The creation of communal memory in the writing of Toni Morrison”, in Wasafiri, 13:17 (1998), pp. 19-23

2. DAVIS, Christina, “Interview with Toni Morrison”, in Présence Africaine, n. 145 (1st trimester 1988), pp. 141-150

3. MORRISON, Toni

“Memory, Creation and Writing”, in Thought, 59/235 (December 1984), pp. 385-390

“The Site of Memory”, in Inventing the Truth: The Art and Craft of Memoir, Boston, ed. William Zinsser, 1995 (2ª edition), pp. 83-102

4. NISHIKAWA, Kinohi, “Morrison’s Things: Between History and Memory”, in Arcade. Literature, the Humanities & the World, arcade.stanford.edu, web, 2021 (https://arcade.stanford.edu/content/morrison’s-things-between-history-and-memory)

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6. SEWARD Adrienne Lanier & TALLY Justine, “Toni Morrison, Memory and Meaning”, in miscelánea: a journal of English and American studies, 52 (2015), pp. 155-158