#DELAYED GRIEF

[cancatsdraw]

my fun new game show called is it delayed grief, seasonal affective, or am i just suddenly insane

[red-enby]

you know the real fun part about having a dead sibling? realizing they were the better child who had their life somewhat together but you, the one who is alive for some fucking reason, are the one who is basically useless and the family disappointment 👍😅

[divinesayer]

i've been thinking about my grandfather a lot as i have gotten older; this piece explores a bit of the delayed grief i've been experiencing. it's currently up on my ko-fi for moon tier members. it'll be up for everyone on new years day!

[dialectical-material-gworl]

Why is it that I don't cry at a funeral? Why don't I breakdown when she told me she doesn't want us anymore? Why is it that every grief hits me on a random Tuesday after five months? Why am I crying about my ex from 2020? Why am I still grieving a friendship breakup from when I was 18? How do I justify all this sadness after all this time?

[terezicaptor]

does anyone else miss qtubbo really really bad

[byierficrecs]

❝ beneath these boughs, my devotion blooms ❞ author: @perexcri

link: archiveofourown.org/works/46500775

personal blog || submit a story || support me on ko-fi 🍂

[10underoot2]

I was really detached in the last 20 mins so I didn't register too many things but I think I'll cry when I watch the end again. I don't understand this delayed response too much lol.

Also like that baby is so smoll and the two of them are going to be incredibly sweet adorable parents. I have so many head canons of them being the most adorable, power couple parents I can't. Seeing the BTS of that scene also has me in the feel.

Edit: I think one of the reasons some of the scenes didn't impact me as deeply was because of the constant switch between comical to sad/profound. I think that messed me up a little. Will defo need to rewatch!

[topnotchquark]

No way your thesis is not now kitten daddy is a shell of his former self

Except it literally is lol.

I've expounded on it a bit earlier too. But life was. Not. Kind. To Vale post his final title.

See the nature of power is that it is a potent drug and even the ones most deft at handling it definitely take psychic damage. When you're someone like Vale who was given a free reign since young adulthood to do whatever you want, you get used to it. He basically got Jeremy Burgess as his mechanic on a whim, and even though Yamaha had their strict Japanese ethos he was able to drive design decisions (colors, gimmicks, cartoons, the works) as he wanted. He was allowed these things because he won.

When he came to Yamaha from Honda, he managed to turn a midfield team around to deliver instant wins. He was able to shut everyone up who thought his wins with Honda were due to the bike.

I guess that's what he wanted when he made the switch to Ducati. A continuation of the magic. Flip a backmarker around, deliver even more on top of the existing 9 championships. Solidify in the minds of the people that Valentino Rossi is the sport and he will win irrespective of circumstances and competition.

Anyway none of that happened. And listen, there are healthy ways to process something like this but whatever that healthy thing is, is not embedded in the mind of a man doing 300kmph on a death machine while also entertaining crowds. (Btw if we compare to similar motorsports champions, Schumi quit after losing in 2005 and 2006 because who wants to have that after basically conquering the world. Lewis' 2021 loss was something that clearly affected him and he's doing what he can to reclaim some of that lost pride and power)

So eventually what we're left with is a man who after 9 championships has to contend with the fact that new and aggressive opponents exist that he can't win out against as easily. And that he's older, and that the world's eyes are on him as usual and now he doesn't have the form and power to dictate how people see him.

Now imagine amidst all this shit show, comes the most gifted rider of generations. Who makes heart eyes at you while you have to contemplate your own mortality. I'd chew at the bars of my own enclosure too.

[void-tiger]

Shiro and Allura should’ve been 27-32. No I won’t be taking criticism on this.

[elitadream]

I can't rememeber if you have been asked this before, but what kind of story would you want a Mario Movie sequel to have? Or what kind of themes or message would you want the film to convey?

First of all, it would depend whether the first film would have to be taken into full consideration for that or not; because if so, that would admittedly limit my ideas quite a bit. I have my own interpretation and imaginings regarding how I would have pictured the main story to go, you see! 🤓📝

But either way, if I had to start at a point that would initiate its own new adventure as a follow-up to the first one (regardless of what it was), I would make it so that the story revolves once again around something that we are closely accustomed to as gamers, and transpose it in a way that would give this universe a new sense of emotional depth and complexity.

The exact theme? Life. Or should I say: "additional" lives. 🎇

Their sheer significance and all-changing capacity. How we often take those for granted as gamers, until we can no longer afford to. What we would do if we had just one more. How we would have played the level differently if we had known. How it impacts our gaming experience as a whole and what it means if we stop to look at it from the hero's point of view. What would happen if they were given a choice. Etc. I've always felt drawn to the idea that these characters could actually die, and have thus made the 1-Up mushroom a massively important element of the lore that I have compiled for my version. Its origin and very existence completely shrouded in mystery. Endlessly sought-after by all. A power-up largely rumored to be real, although nobody can be sure of it nor even claim to have ever seen one.

My aim would be for this story to take a more somber and more mature route while retaining some of the levity that makes this franchise so charming and appealing. Have its narrative acknowlege the seriousness of the addressed theme and embrace its solemn tone. For it to be handled with care and respect; to allow for the characters to express a level of humanity never seen before, and its message to strike a chord with everyone. 💙

[spamgyu]

Bestie. You are very close to committing war crimes. (Regarding Jihoon one shot) Also what the fuck was that?😭😭😭😭😭😭 Where do you get these ideas from? 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 You got me ugly crying on a Sunday afternoon when I'm not PMSing. And the ending? The delayed onset of angst? And the weight of it? You took me back to places I never wanted to go!!!!! 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

I'm would have certified you as a sadist if I had the authority 😔

-🐭

I would like you to take this moment to thank all the men who have hurt me in the past. Without them I wouldn't have this wonderful opportunity to hurt my friends through my work.

I will continue to be the best spamgyu for you all to cheer on this year.

Thank you so much.

Say the name—(gunshot)

[trekkiedean]

today has been the kind of weirdly shitty day where nothing especially terrible happens but I just feel so brittle by the end of it and I’m crying over the silliest things like not being able to find one of my favorite nose rings. (I can order another one and it won’t even be very expensive, it just won’t get here before I go to the con this weekend. like I said! silly!)

[divinesayer]

grandfather clock

my grandfather passed away when i was 11, and i never said goodbye. this poem is that goodbye; it took me over a decade to figure out what to say. support me on ko-fi!

you built a home and a life from an empty shell decades before i was born. 

your laughter seeps into the furniture of that room, and i am pulled towards it.

but the house is silent. and this room has been empty for a lifetime.

my makeshift nightstand, a stool you bought me. i will pass it on to my first born.

a coat of yours hanging in my closet, given to me by your son. it will never fit.

a small taxi sits on a bookshelf. i know you are in the driver's seat.

[batwynn]

I’m re-reading my own 87k word fanfic so I can write a summery/ending for it because it hasn’t been updated in like 10 years, and trying to stop myself from completely editing some truly shitty parts because that’s not what I’m doing—that’s not what I’m doing.

[gontagokuhara]

me just trying to get through this week while the universe keeps launching airstrikes directly into my crumbling mental health causing critical infrastructure damage

[remembertheplunge]

self employed, self unemployed. it's all play

“Western morality tends to put all better things up high and worse things down low.”  From the book "The Soul’s Code”

Monday 2/4/2008 1:15pm

Arturo died 14 years ago today. I’m alone with it. So.sigh.ety won’t hear. Tough cold. A good thing— It’s mine to cherish!

6:30pm

Well, interesting day. Kinda slow, lazy. Arturo’s day Just couldn’t “motion”. (Motion to with draw a plea for a client) Just didn’t feel like it. Oh well! Self Employed. Self Un-employed. It’s all play! I think for Arturo day that I did enough.

“And, when Is there time to remember, to sift, to weigh, to estimate, to total?”

Tillie Olsen:  quoted in the book “Women Who Do Too Much” on the February 3 page

End of entry

Notes. 4/19/2024

Arturo was my Stanislaus County Aids Project (SCAP) match who died February 4, 1994 from Aids. As a SCAP volunteer, I helped Arturo through his illness and was with him at his death. 

I was a deputy public defender for Stanislaus county in 1994 and was preparing to write2 a motion to withdraw a plea for a client in the above entry.