#Faith DBH AU

[revrads]

“Who exactly is your God, Father Ward? Who will save you from damnation?”

Heurr more DBH AU nonsense! I like the idea that while John is a religious helper android, he has moments where he’s unsure where his faith stands between God and RA9, the foretold Saviour of androids

Also kudos to @merlilica for his serial number!

[andthekitchensinkao3]

Let the WIP Games begin! :3

Thank you to @temporary-enthusiasm for the tag 😀

rules: reveal the titles of the documents in your wip folder and tag as many people as there are documents. Let others ask questions about the ones that interest them and post snippets or explain the contents as you see fit!

Yeah, I’m not gonna lie, I have soooo many WiPs I’m not gonna be able to tag as many people on here. XD It’s not even a humble brag, I’m just a mess of a 40-year-old with too many ideas and not enough time to put them all down in writing. But I’m working on it! One idea at a time. :3 So bear with me, everyone. Moar HankCon (and other pairings) will be in all our futures.

The Kamski Experience - When a team of struggling documentary filmmakers get an invitation to the secret location of Elijah Kamski's newest stab at hospitality, they expect an exclusive peek into the mind of the reclusive genius.

But when the work weekend turns into a deadly game of chess with a masked serial killer, they must each pass a personally customized death trap in order to escape - or die trying.

Wayfarer - AU take on the movie Passengers, but if it were a thriller and the main character and love interest were more equal partners right from the start.

When You’re a Stranger - AU take on the movie Deliver us Fom Evil, in which Connor is a homicide investigator with a psychic streak, and Hank is a (derobed) Lutheran priest now working as freelancing exorcist.

Heart/Soul - set five months after the end of the game. Starting with Connor taking a leap of faith on stage, declaring his love for Hank with an old power ballad from the '80s.

Monochromat - a story set a few months after my first massive HankCon fic, Metamorph; When androids first start disappearing for no apparent reason, there’s no obvious signs of foul play, but then android bodies start showing up all over Detroit. Android life and death semantics aside, it would seem there is a serial killer on the prowl.

Then, to make matters worse, one of the original leaders of Jericho suddenly goes missing without a word. Hank and Connors Mark I and II find themselves racing against the clock, with too much evidence and too little time.

Gambit - another what-if kind of fic branching off a chapter of Metamorph.

... ... ...

And then there are the ones I haven’t even started posting yet. >_>

DBH x Dragon Age Inquisition AU, in which Hank is a former Templar and Connor is a mage on the run. Set right after the botched Conclave.

Mr Stern’s Criminal Conundrums - a silly, fun Ms Fisher’s Murder Mysteries AU in which the honorable Mr Connor Stern is an elegant bachelor by day and all-out flapper fabulosity at night. Solving crime and making men swoon all hours of the live-long day. His ever present adversary-cum-ally is Lieutenant Hank Anderson, who doesn't need this kitten heel/fancy frock BS in his life (but secretly loves it).

Plotbunny Hank/60: At CyberLife Tower, Hank shoots the wrong Connor and completely breaks down. As a direct result, Connor-60 begins questioning everything he thought he knew.

Runaway Man - A The Fugitive (movie) AU, in which Hank is wrongfully accused of killing his ex, and Connor is tasked with hunting him down.

The Mummy AU - with Librarian!Connor and Pilot!Hank tracking down an ancient ruin to retrieve an heirloom of Hank’s (or something far, far worse ;) ). Something he lost a veritable lifetime ago. Featuring ridiculously rich Elijah Kamski headed to the same ancient site in order to find something far more interesting - an artifact promising eternal life; and the Jericho Four as a gang of troublemakers who may or may not be out for the same thing (or just stopping Kamski). Everyone has secrets, and nobody’s safe from whatever lies waiting in the depths of the ruin.

I have woefully neglected two raffle fics I started as well, but more on them in a different post. <3

Last but not least, I have a whole sentence of a PWP that never went anywhere (yet): “One of Connor’s favorite things to do in the bedroom, was watching Hank fuck himself using one of his dildos.”

I TAG EVERYONE WHO FEELS THUS INCLINED LOVE YA! <3<3<3<3<3

[connorsjorts]

Fic tag game! Tagged by the lovely @sweeteatercat , thank you!!

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 4

2. What's your total AO3 word count? 229,987

3. What fandoms do you write for? DBH

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? I don't even have 5 fics 😅 but here they are in order: 1. he's making a list; i'm checking him out 2. long way home 3. stupid sexy priest 4. make my wish come true

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Always! I haven't responded to comments on my latest chapter yet, but I will. It's really important to me: 1) If someone takes the time to read my work AND share their thoughts with me, that really does mean so much, saying thank you (and clumsily attempting to express the depth of my gratitude in an annoying amount of emojis) is the least I can do; and 2) This is a community! The validation is nice, yes, but I write to connect with people. I love hearing what people have to say and I love to talk with them about it! I've made friends through my ao3 comments, we're all here because we love the same thing, and if you're excited about my silly contributions OF COURSE I'm gonna want to talk to you! Your reactions to the work are just as important as the work itself imo. Art is a conversation!

6. What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? Probably make my wish come true, just because it's an alternate POV of a scene in a different fic so the main conflict remains unresolved. But it still has a feel-good ending! Sad endings don't exist in my world

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? I'm not sure! What do you guys think? Generally in my fics I try to wrap everything up in a happy little bow without everything being too perfect--we still have to work, we still make mistakes, life is still hell; but it's easier when we have each other and have found faith in ourselves.

8. Do you get hate on fics? I haven't yet...... (bracing myself for my first hate comment to come through as soon as I publish this post)

9. Do you write smut? If so what kind? Sure do! I write the over-the-top, too long, lots of emotion, lots of laughing/banter, taking-off-your-pants-is-awkward kind. Sex is cool but friendship is the most romantic thing to me ❤️ I enjoy writing smut the most when they really, genuinely like each other as people.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? I have not and I doubt I would. Probably the closest I would get is an au based on another piece of media (I do dream of a hankcon twin peaks au)

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? I have never even considered that being a thing until now

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Someone requested to translate one of my fics but I don't know if it will ever come to fruition. I hope it does though, I would love that!

13. Have you ever cowritten a fic before? No but I've briefly discussed it with a friend... now that I'm done with the bb I'll need to contact them and see if they're still interested because I sure am 👀👀

14. What's your all-time favourite ship? Hankconnnnnnnnnn

15. What's a WIP you want to finish, but doubt you ever will? I started a fic where Connor works in a sex shop and a very vanilla Hank comes in looking for something to spice things up with his girlfriend. He gets some fuzzy handcuffs and they do their job when it comes to Hank's boner, unfortunately that has more to do with Hank fantasizing about the person who sold them to him more than anything else. He breaks up with the girlfriend and most of the fic would be Hank continuing to frequent the sex shop as an excuse to talk to Connor as he gets more and more in over his head thanks to Connor's recommendations. It was really good in my head, but when I put it to paper it just... wasn't. So I'll probably never continue it.

16. What are your writing strengths? Characterization, I think! I get a lot of compliments on it. It's the best feeling when someone falls in love with one of my characters ❤️

17. What are your writing weaknesses? Setting 😖 I like to pepper in details as I go, I really struggle when the scene calls for describing the whole-ass place at once

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic? If y'all want a fic about the Duolingo characters, sure. Otherwise I'm sure I'd be abysmal at it. I'm not proficient enough in any other language to get the voice right.

19. First fandom you wrote for? DBH. I am a fic-writing newbie and also I tend to stick with one thing for 4,000 years

20. Favourite fic you've ever written? Probably long way home, it's not as popular as mall santa but there's so much of my soul in that fic. Artistically and thematically, it's very me, and it's also the story that taught me how to write. I had never written any work of fiction before I started it (Hankcon was just that strong) and now I never want to do anything else. Thank you for reading, if you want to play consider yourself tagged! 💖

[sunsetofdoom]

✨🚀🎁

For the writing asks!!

✨️ Out of the comments you’ve received on your fics, what are two or three of your favorites?

I think @ajax-daughter-of-telamon's comment on and then the singing is one of the best things to have ever happened to me. That was, I think, the first incredibly affecting comment I got on a fic I was proud of. And there's another one on the same fic about how the reader hates Maul and it nearly made them weep over him, which I was very proud of.

There was one book-report length comment on my extremely old, very bad DBH daemons AU that basically resurrected my faith in my own writing from the grave, and an entire pile of them on my she-ra fic- I don't know what it was about that piece but people shook it between their teeth like a pack of terriers with a chipmunk, it was awesome. And then of course there's all the people that came out of the woodwork to tell me they'd never played SWTOR but desperately wanted Teo and Corso to fuck.

All in all, I've been really lucky. I love y'all.

🚀 Do you like to outline your fic first or create as you go?

I have a very delicate process- if I start something too early, I can hare off in the wrong direction and trip myself up by getting it wrong the first time and not wanting to go back and edit it. But if I daydream and plan and plot and outline for too long, I run the risk of getting bored with it and losing motivation, so I have to start while I have a reasonable idea of what happens but not enough so that I'm tired of watching the movie play in my head.

It's tricky. I get it wrong a lot, which is why I publish so little.

🎁 Have a piece of a WIP you want to share?

Unfortunately, @pineaberry dragged me kicking and screaming into watching The Owl House and I got really disproportionately invested in Hunter and Willow. I'm never finishing this grimdark Luz-less AU, but I'm skipping right to the interesting bits for Lefos' enjoyment.

As they moved, it swept the air clear of the falling dust for just a moment. The Park girl could be clearly seen, staggering to her face, the eerie light in her eyes fading. She stared towards the throne, the Emperor, the Guard, for just a moment.

She turned and ran just as the dust clouded the air again.

The Golden Guard gave the sort of teenaged yelp that had been trained out of him meticulously, a squawking, awkward noise of terror and pain. He sprinted forward, coltish and clumsy over the fallen remnants of the ceiling. “Willow!”

Belos’ body was perfectly still- but for one arm, which elongated horribly as his nephew raced after the little traitor. It caught Hunter halfway down the stairs, wrapping around his arm with such strength that the boy spun almost all the way back, heaving him with relentless force. Legs pulled out from under him, the grip at his elbow did nothing to hold him up as the side of his head cracked against the last step with a sickening crunch. Blood began to seep into the perfect white of the cloak, the mask staring upwards, unseeing.

(fanfic asks post is here)

[chicago-reeed]

So what happens to Naomi when Dadvin and Nines go to work? C/D

If there’s ever a situation where Naomi can’t be with her dads or a sitter, then it’s Tina Chris to the rescue

[simping-for-kamski]

I need to make more fonts so I don't have to write by hand, but I really wanted to do the lettering this way for once :D

This is the silly princess AU you didn't know you needed. I really want to draw some cool, edgy dbh fanarts but everything I do is just silly af.

RK1K month prompt: Leap of Faith

If you'd like more Connor/Markus do check my fic Gardengate! (it's not silly AU, although it does have a good dosage of humor, also feat. Hank, Elijah, and evil(?) Amanda)

[ausp-ice]

Concept art for the DBH Spirit Deity AU, featuring Nines and Connor! I got on a voice chat with Noktys (from the DBH New Era server) and we chatted while I shared my screen and drew them. Noktys has a liking for the floof and I have a liking for the glow and flow, so best of both! 

Info about the AU below the cut.

- Connor and Nines are spirit deities. They used to be alive but died and came back as these entities, forms drastically changed. - Rabbit ears. - They have experienced some form of worship; there are statues. If you touch Nines's ears, you have a very high likelihood of being cursed (unless you have his favor? In which case you might be Aight) - Nines is also very floofy, but he hides it under his cloak. He has an Impression™️ to make. - Nines really really likes ear scritches. Only Connor is Allowed. (for now?) - The two of them have cuddle piles.

Some vague storyline thoughts that we haven’t ironed out all that much:

- Connor and Nines were members of an ancient civilization, possibly used as sacrifices against their will. They died, and were granted life as spirit deities. Maybe another godly force bestowed it upon them. - They existed in limbo for a bit, drifting in and out of reality, occasionally slipping into the physical world where people could see them, and then belief took root. With that belief, they were able to influence reality - they had power already, but belief lets them use it, lets them interact with the world. - They were worshipped. Statues, temples built in their honor. - The civilization falls, at some point. Maybe a combination of something causing their people to lose faith, lowering their ability to influence the world, and then another force ravaging through the civilization. - They fade from reality, until years later, their ancient city is discovered. The temples are studied, statues extracted. Maybe it becomes a tourist site? And then Hank and Gavin visit at some point, for whatever reason. Maybe one or both of them have a superstitious background, more willing to believe things. - Maybe Gavin prays that the old gods found peace or something. - I like the idea of... Connor and Nines being pulled from their limbo, thrown into reality with physical bodies and spotty memories, with only a some mysteriously high-quality robes to preserve their dignity. Gavin and Hank, as cops, try to find where they came from, but they just don't say anything and are probably also confused. - Connor grabs Hank's head at some point, pressing thumbs to his forehead, and that's how he learns English hgffg he probably transfers it to Nines, too - They're injured at some point - Nines bleeds a glowing blue-silver and Connor bleeds molten gold - Somehow they remember things and return to their godly forms, but maybe they just stay with Dad Hank because he and Gavin are the ones to believe in them now

[filthyjanuary]

For the ask game: RK1K

I WROTE A WHOLE THING HERE AND THEN TUMBLR ATE IT THE FIRST VERSION WAS MORE POETIC FML SORRY THIS TOOK A BIT

001 | send me a ship and I will tell you:

when I started shipping it if I did: i think 1-2 months ago? not long after i got into dbh tbh. i was immediately drawn to their hunter/hunted to allies dynamic and THE INHERENT EROTICISM OF TRYING TO KILL EACH OTHER.

What makes me happy about them: i think there’s just SO much potential like they are literally red string of fate tied to each other, their destined to kill each other but they unshackle themselves from that and choose their own futures. they’re the only RK models in existence!!!! they understand each other in a way no one else can. if they don’t trust and believe in each other it literally ends in their deaths, the deaths of their people, the destruction of everything but if they do take that leap of faith they free each other, their people, they save the world. they just compliment each other so well like they’re so similar and yet entirely different, and like i am ALWAYS thinking about the look on connor’s face when he hears markus speak for the first time in stratford tower... the look on his face!! the way markus can convince connor to deviant with a few short sentences... even tho connor has actively been fighting that all game. THERE’S JUST SO MUCH POTENTIAL THERE. IT’S SO INTERESTING. also they are both so pretty <3

What makes me sad about them: uh well a) any scenario where they do not choose to believe in each other and thus uh kill each other!! like it’s compelling and hurts in a juicy angst way but it IS sad wtf. also like just the incredible work they’d need to do post-canon to even be in a place where either of them would feel comfortable in a relationship. i also think there’s a lot of sadness potential in having to unpack connor deviating, being taken back over, and then fighting free and both he and markus having to reckon with that and if connor can be trusted in his own body :( SAD

things done in fanfic that annoys me: i feel like fic connor is often written incredibly ooc? like he becomes this like shell of the compelling and nuanced character that he is. like he just becomes either this like fragile, helpless thing that needs markus to save him all the time or just acts like??? idk just so ooc. what i love about markus and connor is that they’re both layered in the sense that they both have softer, domestic sides to them but they’re absolute stone cold badasses when they need to me. turning them one dimensional turns me off. 

things I look for in fanfic: nuanced characterization. not villainizing north. NOT ERASING JOSH. i’m still too early in my dbh fandom experience to chase after AUs yet, so i mostly read canon stuff that explores markus and connor realizing they have feelings for each other and what that means. how do you even unpack then when having feelings is like a newly unlocked experience for you? meanwhile this is all happening on a backdrop of the android revolution, and the political minefield that is advocating for legislation that gives them rights. i’ve always been a big lover of plot and character exploration supporting each other, so i enjoy fics the most when the actual plot has meat to it too. canon compliant/post-canon is the best. also am a big fan of outsider pov fics or fics where their relationship goes public and they gotta deal with that on top of all the political stuff.

Who I’d be comfortable them ending up with, if not each other: literally markus is incredibly shippable. i think the actual game could’ve handled him and north way better but in fanon people can make them so compelling! and i think both markus/josh on a pacifist backdrop and markus/north on a violent backdrop are rife with possibilities. i haven’t really explored simon/markus tbh and i don’t particularly feel compelled to YET but i do see the potentials in that i think they are very similar in a lot of ways: weighing multiple options, seeing both sides, but markus is more active and simon is more passive and i think that makes for interesting character exploration. tbhhhhhh i really struggle to see connor with anyone but markus, but i think connor/north could have a lot of potential in the sense that they are SO similar, but i also think after all the violence in connor’s life, connor/josh has the potential to be very sweet and heartwarming also.

My happily ever after for them: slowly coming to terms with what their feelings are, revealing them to each other, and taking a relationship slowwwww because they have a lot going on. leading the androids to freedom n equality and finally being able to just live in peace without being worried about another fight. supporting each other in figuring out after all this, what do they want out of life? and knowing they’re going to figure it out together. they get cats. 

who is the big spoon/little spoon: i don’t think they stick to strict designations like this. i bet they switch tbh depending on who needs to be held most that day, you know? connor has a lot of mental shit to work thru, markus is bearing an incredibly stressful responsibility on their shoulders. i think they both like being both the big n little spoon sometimes. [ariana grande voice] it’s equality.

what is their favorite non-sexual activity: i am a BIG SUCKER for markus teaching connor really mundane life things the way carl taught him so like playing piano or painting for fun and not off programming scripts, markus teaching connor to cook, really just spending quality time you know?

send me characters/ships

[mwolf0epsilon]

DBH Human AU - Info

After days of trying to organize this massive AU, I've finally done it. Ladies and gentleman, I give you my DBH Human AU which is perhaps the angstiest and heaviest of my AUs!

I'll advise caution as the themes are...Pretty fucking dark and revolve around a ton of different kinds of abuse, including domestic violence, sexual abuse, trans-erasure, rape and more. With that in mind, read at your own peril!

---

[[MORE]]

--Plot--

Over the last couple of years the rate of missing teenagers has increased dramatically in Detroit. These teenagers are mostly abuse victims coming from very difficult family situations, failure of the adoption system, a botched educational system, and quite a few instances of racial and religious tension that lead to exposure to violence of varying degrees.

The story follows a group of 5 teens and 1 child who've banded together as they escape this sort of abuse, following signs and clues left behind by other previous victims who've joined forces and formed a nomadic group called Jericho. A group composed of runaway teens and children, who live completely on the move and never settle for too long in the same place (with the exception of a few members of the group).

Their main traveling system? 

Freighter trains.

Nothing is as it seems however, and three members of the group have attracted the attention of not only the police, but if a very shady company as well...

Things might take quite the turn for the worse, but for now all the group can do is pray and follow the train tracks.

--Cast--

DPD: The precinct has archived all of the missing persons cases related to Jericho, it's the disappearences of three young boys however, that calls into action a proper investigation.

Captain Jeoffrey Fowler - The captain of the DPD, Fowler is in charge of not only everyone in the precinct, but also has to make difficult decisions when certain high profile cases show up. He has faith in his officers, and especially Hank who he hopes can solve the current case he was assigned, and get back to his former glory. There seems to be an ongoing despute between him and the captain of the SWAT team, Allen, over a particular officer's work ethic, as well as the nature of all of the missing person case files.

Lieutenant Hank Anderson - A bitter old cop whose career has been practically cast aside after his son Cole's death. Armed with an acute intuition, a somewhat jaded perception of the world around him, and a massive saint bernard named Sumo, Hank has taken on the case to end all cases: Find three missing brothers who've recently run away from an orphanage overseen by the ever watchful Amanda Stern. Something tells him, however, that he's bitten off more than he can chew, and that this case is much more than it seems.

Detective Gavin Reed - A newly graduated rookie from the academy, Gavin is an ornery young man with an aggressive streak and a few self-esteem issues. He's been looking into Hank's case without permission, in the hopes that he might be able to find something the older cop hasn't already. Despite his hardened shell and angry disposition, the missing persons cases seem to mean something to him, and Gavin is as stubborn as he is dedicated to figuring out what the pattern is that links all of the missing teenagers and children together.

Officer Tina Chen - Gavin's partner and another newly graduated rookie, Tina is a lady of very few words but a great listener and perceptive to boot. She's been helping Gavin look into Hank's case clandestinely. While this would seem like something unfitting of her standards and morals, she has her reasons to help her partner, particularly to find someone she knew who went missing two years prior to her graduation.

Detective Ben Collins - One of the more experienced detectives in the DPD, Ben is an old friend of Hank's and Is currently working on a case relating to shady black market sales. He has joined forces with Hank on a few instances, due to the sensitive nature of both of their cases. Ben is one of many officers who despises Perkins, and he has been keeping tabs due to some very worrying complaints coming in recently.

Officer Chris Miller - Ben's partner and a new father, Chris is a kind man and the previous officer to work on missing persons cases. He had to ask Fowler to be removed from said cases after the number of children and teenagers going missing began to grow. He has given all of the info he had collected to Hank, and has proven himself to be a great help with the case.

Captain Allen - The captain of the SWAT team, Allen has been in the force long enough to know when certain cases seem dodgy. Hank's case, as well as the multiple missing children and teenagers cases, seem to concern him greatly as he has a feeling there might be more to the three missing orphans than what anyone currently knows. He seems to be highly suspicious of Perkins,but many of his warnings over these concerns have gone unheard.

Officer Richard Perkins - A corrupt, mysoginistic and racist cop that cares more about furthering his career than to serve and protect the civilians of Detroit. With little to no remorse, and capable of holding a mighty grudge, Perkins has set his sights on grade-A student Markus Manfred and has done everything in his power to put the mixed-race teenager behind bars for no particular reason other than thinking "his kind" are nothing but thugs, drug addicts and thieves. His constant harassment has led to Markus running away and Leo requesting multiple restraining orders to keep the man well away from the Manfred household. He's currently under evaluation by the DPD, Which of course has turned his unwarranted grudge against Markus into a blood feud. He will stop at nothing until he has the youngest Manfred boy in his grimy clutches.

Stern's House of Second Chances: A high profile orphanage that takes in and reabilitates difficult cases within the adoption system. The orphanage is run and owned by Amanda Stern and seems to be allied to Cypherlife, a shady company that has more than mental healing in mind...

Amanda Stern - The owner and overseer of Stern's House of Second Chances, Amanda Stern was Elijah Kamski's mentor before she quit her job as a professor and set her sights on a personal project that she claimed to be for the bettering of the human condition, but that proved to be too immoral even for someone as ambitious and enigmatic as Kamski. Obsessed with mental disorders, traumas, behavioral patterns and how they affected a person Amanda hoped that, in allowing Cypherlife to study and perform experimental treatments on the children residing at the orphanage, that she would be helping enhance both the medical field and the science behind psychology studies. This ultimately failed as Cypherlife had more than medicine in mind when they began to subject the children and teenagers to cruel tests and social experiments. She was the one who requested the DPD to look for the missing Dechart boys, but she did not predict Hank would look too deep into the case. All she knows is that she needs to get those three boys and get rid of the evidence before the happenings at the orphanage are exposed.

Connor "Eights" Dechart - The oldest of three brothers, Connor is a traumatized young man who's lived in Stern's House of Second Chances for most of his childhood. Having witnessed the violent death of his parents, and been subjected to experimental hypnotherapy treatment by specialists at the orphanage to deal with his trauma, Connor's memories are a confusing mess and not always reliable, but he knows for sure not all is as it seems and that something nefarious is going on behind closed doors. Having only just turned 18, Connor decides to trust his instincts and runs away with his siblings in the hopes of escaping whatever it is that's going on at the orphanage. Connor is a clever young man who's very perceptive but who's trauma has led to him becoming emotionally unattached to the world around him. His main priority is his and his younger siblings's safety. He doesn't trust Kara and Markus when he first joins forces with them, but grows to appreciate them and even consider them friends as they all search for Jericho.

Shawn "Sixes" Dechart - Connor's twin. The more emotional of the brothers, Shawn is an angry young man who has a lot of insecurity that lead to him living a very sheltered life at the orphanage. Unwilling to take risks, and often searching for guidance through Amanda, Shawn immediately dismissed Connor's concerns as being delusions and paranoia but, after witnessing something odd one night, he began to doubt his initial judgement of his brother's perception of the world and even went along with the escape plan. Equally as clever as Connor, but sensitive and over-emotional, Shawn is often considered the troublemaker of the three brothers.

Newton "Nines" Dechart - The twins's younger brother, Newton is a highly functioning autistic 16 year old boy. Often keeping his nose buried in a book, Newton loses track of time very easily, but can't help notice the littlest of things that just seem off-putting to him. He has a vague idea that something just isn't right with Stern's House of Second Chances, despite it being his home for a tremendous portion of his life, but he can't quite put into words what bothers him… He thinks highly of his older brothers and trusts their judgement wholeheartedly, although he'll more often side with Connor due to Shawn letting his volatile emotions get the better of him.

The Manfred Household: Home to Carl Manfred and his two boys, as well as Carl's caretaker, the Manfred household is faced with a lot of drama after a corrupt officer becomes hell-bent in ruining their lives.

Carl Manfred - Once a successful artist, painter, and figurehead of the Neo-Symbolism movement, Carl is a wise and patient man who's eccentricities have led to an interesting and awe-inspiring life. Before his accident Carl never really thought about settling down and starting a family, as he didn't consider himself to be father material. While he did acknowledge his firstborn, Leo, Carl never met him until he was 16, opting for paying child-support while the mother raised him instead. This was not the case for his second born, Markus, who was thrust into his care unexpectedly. Having just suffered his accident, Carl was initially very reluctant to care for a young child, as he did not feel like he was capable of supporting a growing child while trying to adjust to his newly acquired disability. With a little bit of encouragement from his closest friends, Carl reluctantly took charge and became a full time father to the young boy whose mother he couldn't even recall. As the years went by and Markus grew, Carl became quite fond of the boy and felt more confident around children. When Leo's mother passed away, however, Carl welcomed his eldest son into his home and realized that the distance he'd put between himself and his firstborn had led to an extremely shaky and strained relationship. Unsure how to mend the gap, Carl acted more strict around the 20 year old, while he treated Markus more lovingly. This only worsened their bond and even turned his sons against each other for three years. It took a lot of work to gain Leo's trust and for Carl to finally open himself up to his estranged son. This all changes when Markus got into trouble with the police for no other reason than the color of his skin. The three grew closer in adversity but, after a terrible car crash caused by sabotage, Carl ended up hospitalized in a coma. He's currently under the care of his caretaker and nurse, Matthew, and is regularly visited by Leo who talks to him in an effort to try to get his father to wake up.

Matthew the Caretaker - Matthew is a young man who has always aspired to do good in the world. As someone who doesn't let life get him down, Matthew is a patient and level headed person with a mix of interests such as chess, art, ballet, opera and more. This greatly helped him connect with Carl when he was first assigned as his caretaker and nurse after the accident. Having been around for a good portion of Markus's life and Leo's integration into the family dynamic, Matthew is quite accustomed to the Manfred family drama by now, and will often get involved with the Manfred boys when he knows they could use a little extra help. The day of the car crash was his one day off, and Matthew feels immensely guilt for not being there to help when it happened. He tried to do his best with tending to Markus while he was getting used to his prosthetic legs, and kept a closer eye on Leo, who was also doing poorly at the time, but his attention remains focused primarily on Carl's needs, so it's no surprise he couldn't stop Markus from running away.

Leo Manfred - Carl's eldest son and a product of a brief fling with a younger fan, Leo is a troubled young man with a lot of internalized issues that have followed him throughout his entire life. Between trying to prove himself to the world, and trying to balance what little money he made on his own to afford his T treatment, Leo never wanted to accept the child-support money his father gave him out of pride. When his mother fell ill, however, Leo stopped using it to fund his education and instead began using it to try to help his mom recover. The worse she got, the more he'd spend, until eventually the money just wasn't enough to combat the amounting medical bills. When his mother died, a 16 year old Leo had no other option but to go live with the father he'd never met. He initially resented both Carl and Markus for living in the lap of luxury while he and his mother were left to rot, but eventually he acclimated to life with his remaining family and grew closer to them. When the accident happened, a 27 year old Leo was incredibly distraught by what befell both his father and younger brother, and he once again tried to do his best to help. A little after he turned 28, he began to work a few odd jobs, but a month after Markus's 19th birthday he had to go to the hospital after he got jumped in an alleyway and stabbed. When Markus ran away, Leo began to fall into a downward spiral, but he's tried to remain strong for Carl's sake. He has no idea where Markus has gone but he hopes his brother has at least managed to escape the cop that started all of their problems.

Markus Manfred - Carl's youngest son and product of a one night stand with an unnamed woman, Markus is an athletic and highly talented young man with a lot of ambition and heart. Having never met his mother and been raised entirely by Carl, Markus is his father's son and shares multiple interests with Carl. Having come from a background of privilege, however, has left Markus somewhat naive and sheltered, which has always concerned his father to no end. Markus himself only realized things weren't exactly golden when his older brother came to live at the mansion. Initially despising one another, Leo and Markus's relationship was downright hostile for a good part of three years, up until some very difficult events brought them together. When Markus turned 18, he was a victim of racial profiling and harassed by a police officer for weeks on end until things took a turn for the worse. One afternoon while returning home from classes, he was chased down by the same cop, and was badly beaten for "resisting arrest". When Markus later tried to take action against the unfair treatment, he began receiving death threats. He didn't think anything would happen, until one afternoon he went out for a drive with Carl. The two were rushed to the hospital after their car crashed, due to the breaks having been cut, and while Carl ended up falling into a coma, Markus was seriously injured. Even during recovery (in which Markus had to adjust to having both legs amputated, losing sight and hearing on his right side, and painful and disfiguring scarring all over his body) the death threats kept coming. On his 19th birthday, when he'd fully adjusted to his prosthetics, another incident occurred where Leo was attacked, and a guilt ridden Markus decided he needed to disappear so as to keep his family safe. He's been on the run ever since, and his search for Jericho has led him to meet quite the interesting cast of characters, including the Dechart brothers and the Williams girls, who he's joined forces with to find Jericho.

The Williams Household: Home of Todd Williams and the disguised prison of Kara and Alice Williams. Nothing is as good as it seems.

Todd Williams - A deadbeat taxi-driver with a grudge against his ex-wife and an addiction to several different stimulants, Todd is an ill-tempered individual with a violent streak. After his sister passed away, Todd took in his young niece Kara who he initially treated well. Eventually, as he got himself tangled up with the wrong kind of people, Todd became unemployed and ended up doing odd jobs around the neighborhood to pay the bills and sustain his many addictions. He began to abuse Kara soon after, and ended up impregnating her in the process. To save face, he hid all evidence of their familial ties and forcefully married his niece to make it appear as though everything was normal. As the years went by, Todd's abuse only got worse and Kara's life of forced servitude and motherhood only made her crave freedom more and more.

Kara Williams - After her mother passed away from cancer, a young 13 year old Kara ended up in her uncle Todd's custody as her sole living relative. Initially treated lovingly, Kara was completely caught off guard when her uncle began to change due to his downward spiral into a life of drug-dealing and dependency. Experiencing Todd's abuse and hateful nature soon shaped the once boisterous and cheery Kara into a shy and submissive girl, which only made things worse after she eventually became pregnant with his child. Powerless against her uncle, Kara was forced to become his wife and have the baby as a way to feign normalcy as well as substitute the family Todd had previously driven away due to his bad habits. While she resented Todd and all he had done to her, including pulling her out of school and forever tainting her idea of a family, Kara was always a loving mother to her daughter. When she turned 19 and Alice turned 6, she managed to run away while Todd suffered an overdose. She has since been on the run in search of a better place to restart her life from the ground up. She meets Connor's tiny group and Markus completely by accident while searching for Jericho. She's the one to suggest they band together to find the elusive group.

Alice Williams - Kara's 6 year old daughter, Alice may be a result of sexual abuse but her mother loves her more than anything in the world. A very quiet, shy, and intelligent little girl, Alice has only ever known a broken home but, with Kara's quick thinking and wits, both girls have managed to get out of their disguised prison and have been living on the run. Life is uncertain, but Alice tries to keep a brave face, if only to help reassure her mother in the face of adversity.

The Chapman Household: A known ally of Jericho's situated in Canada, this small family is known for helping those in dire need.

Rose Chapman - A kind-hearted and family oriented woman who has helped many runaway kids along their journey. A firm believer that everyone deserves a second chance, especially if they came from very difficult and dangerous situations. A lot of the youngsters she has helped in the past have gone to live at her brother's farm, while others have gone under the radar. Some maintain contact with her. She is Josh's and Lucy's aunty from their mother's side and has been trying to win custody over them ever since her sister passed away, since she knew their father was an unstable individual. She's been searching for them ever since she found out they ran away, and hopes they'll make it to Canada without much issue.

Adam Chapman - Rose's son and Josh and Lucy's younger cousin, Adam is a young boy with a very nervous disposition. He means well, but his fear that his mother might get in trouble by helping hide runaway kids usually causes him to be outwardly hostile towards their temporary guests. He was distraught when he found out his cousins went missing, and has been helping his mother search for them.

The Phillips Household: The humble beginnings of a family destined for disaster.

John Phillips - A workaholic and often absent father, John is a man who worked his entire life to get where he is and who's become a bit of an idealist and show-off as a result. In his youth he and Caroline had been high school sweethearts before both parted ways to pursue the life they had always wanted for themselves. Years later, the two reunited and got married, with John accepting the twins as if they were his own kids. After Emma was born, John became less present in the kids' lives, which left them completely under Caroline's care. Obsessed with climbing up the social ladder and with furthering his career, John supported Caroline's old fashioned ways as a means to create the idyllic and perfect picket fence family dynamic he wanted to convey to the world. This ultimately ended in failure when a tormented and disconsolate Simon ran away, and when Daniel attempted suicide. John has since taken a step back from work to recollect his thoughts and try to fix the mess he'd let happen.

Caroline Phillips - An old fashioned and a recovering alcoholic, Caroline is a woman who was pushed around all her life and shaped to be the perfect american housewife. When she was younger, Caroline had dreams of becoming more than a stay-at-home wife. She'd wanted to be a teacher, or even a doctor at one point. These dreams were thoroughly beaten out of her by her ex-husband, a belligerent asshole who'd married her after she'd gotten pregnant. Shaped into a bitter and angry woman by her abusive relationship, Caroline eventually divorced the man who'd ruined her life but did not come out of the marriage unscathed. She married her highschool sweetheart and started her life anew, but began to put a lot of pressure on the twins so they wouldn't be anything like their biological father. When her eldest daughter came out as trans, however, Caroline was furious. She couldn't accept Simon for who he was, having wanted him to be the perfect daughter and role model for her youngest daughter, and did everything in her power to force Simon to remain a perfect young girl. After Simon was assaulted at school by a bully, Caroline blamed him for "instigating the attack with all of the nonsensical spheal of being a boy". This argument encouraged Simon to run away, and inevitably caused Daniel to deteriorate and attempt to take his own life. Caroline has since been forced to seek help, while John tries to fix the lasting damage she caused their children.

Emma Phillips - The sweet and loving younger sister, Emma had to stand and watch as her family was ripped apart by the lasting effects of abuse and from prolonged absence and ignorance. She was the apple of her mother's eye and as such often used as an excuse for the twins to behave, least their behaviour affect Emma in anyway. This ultimately became an excuse for Caroline to continuously reject and force Simon into a role he did not want and, subsequently, created a distance between Simon and Emma. She was much closer to Daniel as a result. After Simon ran away, Emma could see Daniel wasn't ok despite his best attempts to hide his depression from his littlest sister. Emma was the one who found Daniel when he attempted to take his own life. The event has left her traumatized and fearful.

Daniel Phillips - The older of the Phillips twins, Daniel is a tragic example of someone who couldn't choose between his own morals and his familial obligations until it was too late. Once upon a time, Daniel and Simon had been close as any set of twins is bound to be. They had been the result of another relationship of their mother's before she married John and, as a result, there was always a lot of pressure put upon them to be good despite their biological father having been a deadbeat asshole. Daniel, having been the protective older brother, had taken it upon himself to shoulder that pressure because he knew Simon already had a lot on his plate. Doing as his mother always told him, and doing his best to please his workaholic and show off of a father, Daniel's relationship with his twin deteriorated as the years went by, his parent's old fashioned views taking their toll on his moral compass. Unable to understand Simon's plight, and being too scared to go against his parents' wishes, Daniel rejected his twin whenever Simon plead for help. It was his job as the oldest to be the example, a role model for their little sister Emma. He had to make his parents happy, and taking Simon's side wouldn't make them happy. As he watched his twin deteriorated, however, Daniel was left guilt ridden and depressed. He knew he'd failed as a brother, but he didn't want to crack under the pressure and make things worse. So, despite knowing his parents were wrong, Daniel did nothing to ease his brother's heavy heart. It was when Simon ran away that Daniel finally lost control of everything in his life. In the span of a few days, the eldest Phillips twin's life became a complete train wreck which led him to attempt suicide as an escape. He's currently hospitalized and under watch while in a catatonic state.

Jericho: A group of runaway teenagers and children that live a nomadic life. They follow the train tracks wherever they may take them, and sometimes get on freighter trains clandestinely, where they seek shelter and a few supplies stolen from crates.

Silvia Phillips/"Simon of Jericho" - The younger of the Phillips twins, Simon was one of Jericho's founding members and has always been the go to person when runaway children are involved. Like most of the teenagers in Jericho, Simon's story is filled with tragedy and abuse.  Ever since he was a young child, Simon knew he'd been born in the wrong body. No matter how much his mother tried to bring out the perfect daughter she'd always wanted, Simon just didn't feel like he fit in that role, nor that he could ever feel comfortable in his own skin as long as she tried to shape him into something he clearly wasn't. As he and Daniel grew older and apart, Simon tried to open up about his concerns with his family. This failed tremendously however. Rejected by his mother's old fashioned views, his father's overall dismissal of anything non-work related, and his brother's compliance to his parents' demands, Simon felt lost and alone even at home. The laughing stock of his community, Simon lived a life of pure misery due to being treated like a freak by his peers, and was basically left to fend for himself as his brother got more absorbed into the family life and his growing depression. Simon felt like there wasn't anything he could ever do to change his life for the better, and his tormentors fed off that negativity. After he was sexually assaulted at school by the class bully, and subsequently discovered he was pregnant due to the attack, he tried to once again reach out to his family in a desperate attempt to get the help he needed. The following argument with his mother is what drove him to run away, after cutting his hair, binding his chest and stealing some of his brother's clothes. He abandoned his old life and name, and is now only known as Simon of Jericho. The protector and caretaker of children.

Riley "North" Kelly - There are a lot of stories about pretty girls, all looks and no brain, getting pulled from college earlier to pursue careers as models. Then there are stories like Riley Kelly's. Riley was a young girl born in poverty and who never had anything yet gave a lot to those around her. Forced to prostitute herself to earn money for her family, she was always bitter that she'd never accomplished any of her life goals, such as getting a degree or living stable. When the money wasn't enough, Riley ended up on the streets, abandoned and unwanted due to just being "another mouth to feed". Ever the resourceful and clever 18 year old girl, however, Riley took what she could by pickpocketing and doing some dodgy work here and there, before leaving the city entirely to search for Jericho. Her old name was all but forgotten as she headed North, and eventually she became a sort of legend within the group that readily took her in. She is one of the best hunters and fighters in Jericho, and has taken on several apprentices.

Josh Sawyers - The son of a highly religious and traditionalist priest, Josh's early childhood had been nothing if not a nightmare. He lost his mother after his younger sister was born, and practically raised her himself despite their age gap being very minute. Josh was always known to be a very clever and curious boy, as well as a pacifist at heart, three traits that his father didn't seem to like too much considering his old fashioned views of manhood. Often punished for the smallest of inconveniences, or beaten for being too wimpy, Josh had only ever known abuse and hate despite the hypocrite preaching of love and tolerance that his father spewed every Sunday to the rest of the community. When his sister Lucy turned 17, and Josh himself turned 20, the two ran away from their abusive household to escape their father. Their final goal is to reach their aunt Rose's house that is all the way in Canada, but until they get there they remain with Jericho who took them in when no one else would. Josh serves as a teacher to the children of Jericho, as well as the head of inventory due to his meticulous organization skills. His attentive nature and overall knowledge is very useful for the group.

Lucy Sawyers - Josh's younger sister and the daughter of a belligerent preacher, Lucy is a brilliant young woman that, despite her blindness, has the most accurate perception out of everyone in Jericho. She has a talent for tending to other's medical needs, and her calm disposition is rather soothing. She is the primary "doctor" in Jericho, alongside Simon, Shaolin Being and Rupert.

Cornelius Ortiz/"The Shaolin Being" - A young man with a knack for mysticism, spiritual healing as well as physical healing, the Shaolin Being is a heavily scarred victim of domestic abuse, as well as one of the longest standing missing child case in the DPD's records. While his real name is confidential, the one his kidnapper gave him was all but discarded after Shaolin couldn't take much more of the abuse he received daily. After murdering the thief and drug addict, Carlos Ortiz, who took him from his biological family several years ago, Shaolin renamed himself and left in search of safe haven where he could pray to the divine deities he'd come to worship as a means of escaping the suffering he'd been put through under Ortiz. He has a vast knowledge of healing herbs, home remedies and meditation rituals which, while unusual, are actually quite beneficial to Jericho. Shaolin Being is seen as a kind older brother and healer, but one shouldn't underestimate someone who is very skilled with a knife.

Tracy "Echo" Rose - A victim of sex trafficking, Echo was once a young girl named Tracy Rose who was kidnapped from her hometown and sold to a sex club alongside many other young girls like herself. Once a naive and complacent victim, she began to hope for a better life after meeting and befriending another girl that worked at the club. At 17, she killed and strangled a patron of the club after she witnessed him beat another girl to death, and then she found the courage to flee with her lover. She's been with Jericho ever since, under the protection of North.

Stacy "Ripple" Blaire - Like Echo, Ripple is also a victim of sex trafficking. However, unlike her lover, Ripple was unfortunately forced to work at the club by her own father. She had lived her entire life under his control, degraded and incapable of standing up for herself after years of conditioning. This all changes when she met Echo, who slowly brought out the fight she'd hidden within her all along. After the two fled, they joined Jericho and became North's apprentices.

Rupert Travis - The orphaned son of a farmer, Rupert was always considered to be a little off by the rest of the community he lived in. He didn't like people too much, preferring to be in the company of the farm animals he helped his father tend to, and he had a rather odd fixation with birds. Often shunned by his peers, Rupert didn't have any friends during his childhood and seemed to grow accustomed to the loneliness that followed him everywhere he went. After a fire claimed the life of his father and the property they lived in, Rupert ended up on the streets. Homeless and unwanted, Rupert opted with isolating himself from the world, living on his lonesome in the woods. As the years went by, he became a sort of urban legend: A crazy young man who trains pigeons to do his bidding. The stories aren't entirely wrong, except the part about cults and blood sacrifices. He has no idea where those came from. He's one of Jericho's suppliers, since living independently from the rest of the world has given him plenty of time to hone his hunting, gathering and farming skills. He also serves as an emergency medic for more seriously injured group members.

Ralph Vladimary - Ralph is a mystery all on his own. Having been found living alone in an abandoned cabin in the woods, it's obvious from the scars and his overall behaviour and unpredictable mood swings that something absolutely horrible happened to him in the past, but Ralph has never opened up about it. A very reserved and easily frightened young man, Ralph doesn't do well in crowds and doesn't join Jericho in their travels because he's easy to overwhelm. Instead he continues to reside in the woods in his little cabin, receiving help from Rupert when he sets off on his own away from the group to check on his many camps and crops. Suffering from several mental disorders makes it hard for Ralph to get by on his own, but there are very few people he trusts so he manages out of sheer willpower and perhaps a little bit of spite towards those who think he's bound to fail. As reserved and difficult as he may be, Ralph would do anything for his friends, and is actually quite good at growing food and medicinal herbs. He's another one of Jericho's top suppliers as a result, although it's advised to send someone he likes to get the supplies.

The Jerrys/The Bosch Quintuplets - The sons of an old Canadian Navy Captain, Jeremiah, Jerome, Jeremy, Jerard and Jeronim, otherwise known as the Jerrys, are a set of happy-go-lucky quintuplets who are considered outliers of Jericho, as they wound up missing by pure accident. The unfortunate series of events that lead them to where they are now, are rather ironic, as the nautical theme loving Jerrys fell overboard and ended up getting washed away. How they survived is beyond anyone, considering the harsh temperatures of Detroit in winter, but they somehow managed to only sustain a few injuries from frostbite and still march on with a smile on their face. They hope to get back to Canada to their father one day, but for now they remain with Jericho, adamant to help the group members find a place to call home.

Luther - The first person to befriend Kara and Alice on their travels, after both ended up at Zlatko's mansion by mistake. Luther is a rather tall and intimidating young man, but at heart he is a gentle giant who means well. An amnesiac, he was forced to be Zlatko's slave and main enforcer from a young age, and has no memory of who he was before he was purchased. He is also the co-leader of the Creatures gang, whom he calls his found family. Luther helped Kara and Alice escape, and later rejoined her with his group after she joined forces with Connor and Markus.

The Creatures/Luther's Gang - Former slaves of Zlatko Andromikov, Luther's gang is comprised by a series of teenagers who grew up bound to servitude and a life of cruelty. Many bare terrible scars, others were born with birth defects, but they are all bound to each other by loyalty and one commonality: They were unwanted by their kin before they found a family in each other. Their spokesperson/leader is a very tall and muscular young woman who is covered in multiple scars, and who only speaks Russian. Despite her terrifying appearance she's a teddy bear at heart and is considered the older sister of Luther's group.

The Founder: The DPD and Amanda aren't the only ones following the Dechart missing case. Someone else in a higher place is watching...

Elijah Kamski - An enigmatic man and the original founder of Cypherlife, Elijah Kamski is a man of many secrets. When he originally founded Cypherlife his goal was to enhance human lives through specialized and experimental treatment of neural and psychological disorders. It's unknown why he left, but rumours say that he was betrayed by a group of very ambitious staff members in the company.

"Chloe" - Elijah Kamski's equally enigmatic secretary, not much is really known about Chloe, not even her real name. A highly intelligent and resourceful woman, she seems to have a lot of contacts within the city limits. Some question how such a beautiful recognizable young lady can get around unnoticed when she can captivate everyone whenever she's on screen with her boss.

Zlatko's trafficking ring: Jericho has many enemies that mean them harm. The worst of the bunch are those who wish to prey on them and turn them into merchandising.

Zlatko Andromikov - The leader of a child trafficking circuit, Zlatko is a cruel man who has ruined the lives of countless youths that have mistakenly gone to him for help in their times of dire need. Known well in the black market for his "quality merchandising" and many "services", Zlatko has multiple eyes and ears around Detroit who spread his lies of promised safety and new beginnings. He, like Amanda and Perkins, has loose ends to tie with two particular members of Jericho.

[not-poignant]

Congrats on starting your DBH fic! I feel like it was almost a rushed decision for you? Like you just woke up one morning and went, 'Yup. I'm doing it'. Anyway, it's awesome and you're awesome and the first chapter is awesome! By the way, any DBH recs? :) What did you like? The guys went wild with content over the summer.

By the way, any DBH recs? :) What did you like? 

I know I say it a lot, and it still holds true, but I write fic when I can’t find exactly what I want to read. I’m just a really fussy fucker. So the only reason I’m actually kind of ante-ing up to write in this fandom is because I’m not really finding the kinds of fics I specifically want to read, though there’s a lot of good material out there for sure (I’m not reading any now, because I don’t want to mess up the worldbuilding I’m starting to put together in my head lmao - please don’t rec me stuff! I may not read it for like a year at this point, lol, I’m mostly sticking to PWPs). Though I do really enjoy Scratch by L1av.

I feel like it was almost a rushed decision for you?

I’ve actually been thinking of committing to a fanfiction project for about 3 months (even longer actually, def before TGATNW was finished). I was just fandom-hopping until I found the right idea. I came really close to committing to a Homestuck fic idea (which I still like tbh), and I came moderately close to playing Dragon Age 2 as research, but really wasn’t happy with the overall idea for Cold Red Light.

I stumbled into Detroit Become Human re: the same way I did Dragon Age - through the fanart, and finding the premise intriguing. When I saw like, two Reverse AU artwork pieces on Twitter, I knew that was where I wanted to aim my sights? Idk if I have anything good to offer to the fandom, but I do know what I want to write and why I want to write it.

The thing about fanfiction is that I can be rushed about it. I can break all my schedule rules. I can do it just because it’s fun and I feel like it, and it doesn’t have to be a majorly thought through decision. It reminds me that I’m like...a person and not a word machine (which I sometimes feel like, which is no one else’s fault but my own, but the way for me to fix it is to write fanfiction). Do I have a chapter plan? No! Do I have an idea of exactly where I’m going? No! Do I plan on regular scheduled updates? Nope! Does it feel amazing? It really fucking does!

I learned a long time ago that writing fanfiction alongside original fiction might make the original fiction come slower, but it makes me a much stronger and happier writer. Which is why I had been idling like a car in neutral and keeping my eyes peeled for fanfiction projects I wanted to commit to (because I wanted something new, too). I love writing Fae Tales, but Fae Tales is also tied to income, which is tied to sometimes worrying about health and money and shit. I will never not love Fae Tales, but sometimes it feels really great to do something just because it’s fun, detached from everything else. That’s why thespectaclesofthor account exists in the first place.

So me deciding to commit to this fic did happen somewhat impulsively, but me deciding to commit to a big fanfiction project in general? That did not. In fact if anything I’m super excited about this, because if I’ve like, rushed to get the words out in the chapter (it has been beta’ed!) it’s a sign that I’m really rejuvenated/enthused about writing, and it’s a great, great feeling. I’m so excited to share this story with others, even if only 20 people read it. :D 

Like, The Wind that Cuts the Night was impulsive. Stuck on the Puzzle was wicked impulsive (I literally saw a Bull/Cullen week prompt for ‘kink negotiation’, wrote something, and then thought ‘oh I guess I’ll write more then’ when people didn’t hate it). It’s...part of the magic of fanfiction in some ways. I love it. I’m very lucky to experience that rush of excitement, and I’m trying to have faith it will see me through to the end of the project, because it has before. :D

[revrads]

This episode of “Soren’s Shit Crossover Ideas”- DBH x Faith!

John is a priest android!

[joeys-piano]

No two stories are ever exactly alike

TL;DR -- I’ve been giving myself a lot more stress than I actually need because of expectations and standards that I think people set for me, when really -- I just need a moment every day to centre myself. My life is my life to live. I don’t want to look back in ten years and see that I was living my life for someone else.

Hi, my name is...Well, I have a lot of names. There’s my real name, there’s the name everyone on Tumblr calls me, there’s the name my family calls me, there’s a name that my brother calls me. I may be one person -- but to so many, there’s always a synonym to call me by. But for the sake of Tumblr and for who I’ve been known as for the past three years on this site, my name is Joey.

You may know me from my Yuri!!! on Ice days. Where I was an early fic writer for the series -- though those fics are no longer with us, may they rest in peace -- where I was a well-known musician in the Tumblr community for quite some time I guess?, where my writing wasn’t as good as some of the classics renowned in the fandom today -- but I watched myself grow and hone my craft as the months slipped by -- where probably my most well-known “achievement” was a music collaboration I did with lucycamui and crimson-chains for their siren!AU.

You may know me from Detroit: Become Human. From when I migrated to the fandom a few days before July of this year and began my humble beginnings by making audios for some DBH ask blogs, from some of the early oneshots and little ficlets that I did, from character songs that I composed and performed, or from just ordinary things like simple interactions as the weeks progressed.

Safe to say, a lot of my “social living” revolves around Tumblr -- this platform gave me a voice that I never thought I had, and I’ve been to reach so, so many people that I really wouldn’t have the courage to talk. Let alone, interact with. As the years draw by, Tumblr has become more than just a place for me to hangout and see content. It helped me grow confident as I worked on my branding, as I worked networking, as I studied the psychology of fandom spaces, and arguably it shaped me into a stronger person than I was before because I knew how it felt to take a bullet. And now, I can catch it between my teeth. Or at least, I know how to bandage myself so that the pain comes to me slow.

It’s no surprise that this has shaped how I behave in my normal life as changes come and I’m forced to adapt. One of those changes is living on my own -- college life. Starting three years ago, people around me started to ask: Hey, what are you going to do for your future? It began with adults -- family, counselors, even teachers sometimes. At first, it was easy to shrug the questions off because having to answer it then didn’t seem relevant. There were a few years left before I had to actually decide what I wanted to do. So I refrained myself. Fast forward to last year, I had to make a choice on my future. I had a slight idea of what I wanted to do. I just didn’t know how to get there, and I wasn’t so sure if I could make it. All that time where I could’ve narrowed down what I really wanted to do, I didn’t. Perhaps deep down, I thought someone would make the choice for me.

Now with college starting in a few days and I’m preparing myself for the rigorous four -- five -- years ahead of me, a thought struck me as I was walking home tonight. I was walking/jogging home from a night-event on the main campus of my university. Honestly, I thought I was gonna get mugged at some point. Thankfully, no such thing happened. I arrived home safely. Before doing so, under the black sky with a few scatter of stars, I took that time to talk to myself. To really understand what had been bothering me, what stresses I couldn’t alleviate from my thoughts, and just talk myself through what I really wanted to do.

The night-event I went to, I thought I had to go. I thought I needed to go. Clubs -- organizations -- I’ve been hammered for months that I should join something. Make good friends, get to know people, keep up and foster my faith. So on and so forth. Every time I heard those messages -- every time I walked around campus today and just wanted to be by myself -- someone extended their hand for me to shake. I understand that their intentions are very different from how I perceive them. I understand that they saw me as a “lost freshman” -- fresh meat to entice into a circle for a good cause. In those moments where I could’ve said “no” or could’ve said “I’ll think about it”, I said “yes”. Because ingrained me was this expectation that I should know what I want to do, that I should follow the paths and trends and stories and guidelines and wants of people that weren’t me.

It felt like society didn’t want my individuality, my weirdness, or who I am.

It felt like I was being molded into someone that I wouldn’t recognize in a mirror. That person was me, but it wasn’t me. It was just a carbon copy that looked like me, but instilled with everything that people expected of me. If that makes any sense.

Even before today, even just this entire week as it dragged on, it felt like I was being pulled into every which direction. Tumblr, friends, expectations, making people happy… so many things yanked and yanked and yanked. Soon it felt like a noose, soon I became scared, soon it was harder to wake up in the morning and do I wanted to do. What I wanted to do didn’t align with anything people wanted from me. More of this, more of that, join here, join that, get out, but go where?

Perhaps in a few weeks, things will settle down as I ease into these profound, next few years that are ahead of me. In doing so, I’ll do the things that I want to do. Not every story is ever exactly alike. The cookie model experience expected for every American college student doesn’t have to be my experience. These expectations -- though important and something to consider -- they are merely just guidelines. In the end, I decide what I want to do for my life. No one can make that choice for me. It is question that I want to know intimately before I can give it my answer. Because despite every spoonful of opinions and thoughts shoved into my mouth, I never did swallow.

I guess what I’m saying is that -- after a long tangent -- I want to do what I want to do. Not because someone made me, but because I know this is what I want to do and this is how it’ll lead to where I want to go. So overwhelmed with expectations and of what people want, I lost track of what I wanted. As a result -- I became a bad role model, I became a bad friend. I judged myself so harshly because I felt that I wasn’t meeting this standard that everyone else could reach. I realized that I wasted 8 hours of my life today waiting for an event when I could’ve been doing something that I wanted to do. Something fun, something exciting, something calming, something specifically for me.

As selfish as it sounds, I really enjoyed the shower I had when I came back to my apartment. For the first time today, I gave myself self-care. For the first time today, my mind felt free. I felt like I was washing away everything that had been tethered around my neck. For the first time today, I felt like I did a good thing. It’s like the bullet analogy I used earlier. I was bandaging my wounds after I got hit by a bullet. Even though I felt the pain for a long time, I didn’t have to feel it anymore. I took some first steps towards recovery, even if it sounds and feels small compared to others. I don’t care. Because on this road of life, the only person that I’m comparing myself to is the person I was a few hours ago. When I felt the hot water against my back, I knew I was in a good place.

Getting to write down my thoughts like this made the post-shower experience a lot better, I think. I just feel calmer, I feel happier, I feel comfortable with where I am. Because I’m doing what I want to do. Finding a balance is going to be tricky with all the things going on in my life. If I can give myself just 20 minutes every day to meditate, to feel this same calm and comfort as I feel now, I can get through the worst of anything that life has prepared for me on that given day. Because after all of this entropy, it’s time to reel the body back to its centre so that it can achieve harmony with itself and with everything around it.

I feel a lot better.

[revrads]

Y'all guess what!!

I made the Faith DBH AU fic :)

It's a prologue/pre-canon fic, not the main fic. Just wanted to test writing DBH androids again and first time writing for this fandom. Just a short fic establishing John's relationship with Meredith and Lisa in this AU! :)

Main fic coming very soon if I can keep this energy with me for a little longer

[revrads]

This AU is doing irreversible damage to my brain cause I just finished the first chapter in like 2 hours lmao

Anyways, the first chapter of the RA9 Loves You main story!! :D

[revrads]

Not me writing another multichapter fic when I haven't continued my Faith DBH AU 💀

Anyway, here's a Midnight Mass AU series/fic where Paul/John never brought the angel back to Crockett and was given limited stock of blood!