#Funny New Year Jokes 2019

[freckliedan]

if they're both out, then why bother hiding their relationship / stuff like sharing a room and going on couple holidays? surely all of their fans know that they're together so i don't get the point of buying a home with 2 bedrooms and having a fake apartments? sorry very confused very casual fan here

hi!!! i am always so happy to share information, so ty for asking me about it! i'm going to take these questions piece by piece ^_^

if they're out why bother hiding: most of the examples of them taking serious steps to hide their relationship are from before they came out! they have been together since 2009, but dan wasn't even out to his family until 2019, shortly before he came out publicly.

why not come out sooner than that? i'll try to be brief and avoid rehashing dan's entire coming out video (which is worth watching). several reasons: he was severely bullied from early childhood onward for being gay—from before he even had the chance to consider if he was actually gay. his dad was homophobic to the point dan seems to have removed him from his life completely, & he was raised by religious grandparents so unsure of the reception there.

and significantly: he and phil were outed by a youtube glitch that leaked an extremely personal video in 2011 that leaked again on a broader scale about a year later. being outed was a part of the bullying dan had experienced so this was retraumatizing but on a bigger scale.

they had had SOME level of plausable deniability regarding their relationship before the leak, but hadn't been very actively closeting themselves before that point? and then the leak happened around when they were blowing up in popularity/around when youtube was becoming a viable career, so they were already grappling with sudden fame & a lot of other things happening in their lives at the time.

dan was 20 and phil was 24 the first time that video leaked; they were 21 and 25 and living in an apartment they couldn't afford on their own hoping the bbc would hire them (they did) the second time it did. it makes sense that they came down hard & firmly closeted themselves, especially dan, especially with what he's shared of his personal experiences.

2012-13 was the peak closet, but by 2015 they were already being more open—that's the first couple's trip they went on again after active closeting started. they've just become more and more open from there, but the peak closet era was so definitive that the public perception of them as not a couple WILL NOT SHIFT until they directly express that they are a couple.

they ARE out to fans as a couple, and imo have been since before they came out individually. they've said things along the lines of "we know you know" multiple times.

why not be definitive about their relationship status when they came out? it would've overshadowed them coming out as individuals and they didn't want that. it will be MASSIVE news when they hard launch their relationship. they went ambiguous with it on purpose in 2019 and succeeded.

so. to circle back to your questions.

why bother hiding their relationship? they haven't really since coming out. they've been living freely and being open about that in whatever ways are comfortable to them. they took some time out of the public eye for a while and i'm glad they got to have that so they could explore what happiness looks like without feeling the need to perform. but it was also something that was intentionally temporary!

at this point in time when they call each other friends or roommates etc they're fully doing a bit. like. it's funny! and it's funny at our expense which makes it even funnier—it's their turn to put us through some shit, you know? & the joke is more on people who AREN'T familiar with them than anyone else at this point. it's nice being in on things with them.

why hide sharing a bedroom? they haven't really since moving into their forever home! they have a bedroom and a guest room and there's a murphy bed in phil's filming space/personal office.

phil at some point made a comment that the murphy bed is for if they have two guests over at the same time—something that will only really read as "they share a bedroom" to people keeping track of rooms in their house.

i don't think that they share a bed they sleep in 100% of the time. which is like, normal and healthy? being able to sleep in a different bed when you want/need is NICE i've known so many people who keep seperate rooms in committed relationships and if i was rich enough i'd love having two bedrooms with beds in them in my relationship. even if we'd mostly sleep in the same place.

i also think having multiple beds means dan and phil can have freak sex in one and be lazy about clean up bc they have other beds so that's. a plus for them too.

but like. yeah. i think it's less that they're hiding that they share a bedroom and more that they share a bedroom but have better boundaries with their audience at this point—there stopped being video liveshows after they came out and they'd stopped doing liveshows from their actual bedroom when they moved in to the separate apartment situation.

+ the separate apartment situation was ONLY ever meant to be short term, & was a solution to the situation before that, when every room was in videos and it permanently felt like they were living in sets.

why hide couple holidays? they haven't since before coming out! they also go on a lot of double dates.

no sorries on the confusion and thank you for the chance to infodump!

[struwberrii]

haikyuu!! at an american high school ദ്ദി ˉ͈̀꒳ˉ͈́ )✧

here are my silly headcanons on how i think the karasuno first years would act if they were american high school students teehee

pt.2 pt.3

ヽ(^◇^*)/

hinata

probably runs to lunch

one of those dorky try hards in gym

wears matching neon nike shorts and tops

literally cries if he ever gets in trouble in class

water bottle flips randomly (he never lands it)

his mom drops him off at school every morning

jumps to touch the top of every doorframe

everyone judges him and thinks hes weird but hes gen the sweetest guy if you ever talk to him

he has a phone he just cant bring it to school guys

offers to do stuff first when the teacher asks (like brings attendance to the office or asks other teachers for dry erase markers)

middle school humor (hes kinda funny sometimes tho lol)

kageyama

lets you copy his homework because he knows its all wrong (or gives you wrong answers on purpose)

wears hoodies everyday even during summer

scared to put lip balm on in public because someone once asked if he was gay because of how he applied it

friends with hinata but is kind of embarrassed of him

girls actually like him but dont talk to him because hes so quiet

probably talks to girls from different schools

plays roblox with the others when they have breaks during practice (he hasnt updated his avatar since 2016)

still reads strictly picture books

also a try hard in gym

still does streaks on snapchat

tsukishima

refuses to acknowledge hinata and kageyama outside of volleyball club (he thinks theyre embarrassing)

constantly gets in trouble for having airbuds in or being on his phone

tries putting girls onto his niche music taste then its just cigarettes after sex

if you arent one of his friends or a pretty person hes probably gonna be rlly mean to you im sorry

has hot topic pins on his bag (yamaguchi forces him to shop there with him and tsuki always ends up walking out with a new pin)

dresses very basic but still nice

bros a bully

tries to correct teachers and make the teacher look dumb

if he can tell he actually hurt your feelings he'll say it was just a joke and gaslight you

him and yamaguchi just talk shit all lunch and study period

walks to like mcdonalds for lunch sometimes

yamaguchi

bully on the DL

the only reason people know hes mean is because tsuki is his best friend

always has fruit for lunch

probably in band and plays literally the biggest instrument in the world

he always smells weirdly minty

has the silliest stickers on everything, his notebooks, laptop, headphones

bought sonny angels for him and tsuki

everyone thinks hes gay

him and yachi are art class buddies

brings his switch to school sometimes

rides his bike to school

lowkey stuck in his 2020 indie phase

yachi

has the cutest stationary

takes all her notes on her ipad and has that paper texture screen protector

ali express warrior

shes the sweetest girl in school

probably a closeted lebanese

already has her drivers permit (probably gonna be the first person in her grade with a license)

packs her own lunches everyday in bento boxes

has a private instagram account with like 20 followers and declines everyone she doesnt know personally

always has lotion, gum, perfume, medicine, chargers, everything. she is not taking any chaces

shes like if the 2019 soft girl pinterest aethetic became a person

reminds teachers about the homework

secretly watches youtube during class

she does NOT play about her art projects

her and yamaguchi trade stickers

probably still uses that 2019 kanken vsco bookbag

⋆｡‧˚ʚɞ˚‧｡⋆

sorry guys half of this list is just me being an extreme hater and projecting

[cheriladycl01]

Sidewomen - Twitch Quartet x Youtuber/Streamer! Reader

Plot: Y/N started a youtube group with 5 friends from school, and they all got famous. They had one video with the Sidemen, which led to them jokingly being called the Sidewomen. What happens when she comes onto one of the F1 boys stream.

Back when you were younger you and your friends would make funny videos, it was a group of 5 of you. You guys always joked about how you were the off brand spice girls, all having majorly different looks and personalities but somehow made it work.

As you guys got older, and content wasn't just silly kid like videos your subscribers grew, as did your names in the community. You ended up getting lots of attention and ended up making a video with the Sidemen. It was one of their $200 dollar v $20,000 dollar holidays. Josh and one of your girls, y/f/n, were the people out of the challenge and prepared it for you.

On one team, it was you, y/bf/n, Tobi, Simon and Harry and on the other team it was your your other two friends with JJ, Ethan and Vik all on the other team.

You guys lucked out in the video and ended up getting the $20,000 holiday being sent to The Sands Hotel in Barbados. You guys spent the week there doing watersports, art, sightseeing and relaxing. After this video, people jokingly started referring to you as the Sidewomen. You guys did similar challenge videos on the joint account you all had, but on your individual accounts you all had different passions.

One of you big ones was gaming, as well as travel. One year in 2019, you'd done a Budget Travel with me around the world. Where you'd followed the F1 Grand Prix around the world, attending each race with the cheapest ticket you could get, and the cheapest flights and standard accommodation. You camped at Silverstone, which was difficult considering you had at this point 10 million subscribers and people had noticed you.

This got you a lot of traction and in Abu Dhabi the last race of the season you were given a paddock pass upgrade. You filmed around and showed what was offered at the different hospitalities and you met some of the pit crew, but out of respect you didn't haggle any of the drivers.

They noticed this. Of course they did.

There was a buzz when you'd come into the paddock. One majorly different from when different celebrities came in. You knew the sport and you knew the sport on a technical level. If you wanted to in a different life you'd be a commentator or an engineer.

The drivers were shocked that every time they saw you to try and say hello, you were busy talking to a mechanic from Aston Martin, or a Social Media Member from Red Bull, or the coffee girl in Ferrari hospitality... you were seemingly walking around and talking to everyone but the drivers.

Once the pandemic hit, in early 2020 and it was said that the Australian GP had been cancelled and the rest of the season seemingly had as well.

But this was fantastic for content creators, you were now pretty much what everyone was watching. So when you saw Lando, George, Alex and Charles all streaming on twitch sim racing against each other you took the opportunity to be a menace.

You subbed to each of them, tier 3 of course before gifting out a load of subs.

"Thank you so much y/t/h (your twitch handle) for the 50 gifted subs, that's insane" Charles said seeing the notification pop up. Everyone in chat started to go wild, realizing it was you.

"Thanks for the 50 gifted y/t/h, really appreciate it!" George had said before proceeding to crash into a wall and look at the camera in defeat before reversing his car and driving towards the pit lane.

"Ah thank you, how do you say that name... y/t/h? Thank you for the 50 gifted, I'm still new to this so I'm sorry if there was a message with that and it didn't pop up for whatever reason, mods ... let me know" he says, as sweet as ever making your heart warm.

"y/t/h ... what the hell is up!" Lando exclaims being the only one to actually recognize your twitch name and know who you were.

"Lando who are you talking too?" George asks hearing the boy not muted.

"Wait you guys know Y/N Y/L/N right?" Lando asks having made you a VIP in his chat so he could see your messages easier and seen that all of them didn't have the realization that it was you.

"Yeah, her videos have saved me in quarantine!" Alex exclaimed remembering that him and his girlfriend Lily often binge watched her videos, calling her their shared wife as a joke.

"Oh, yes she's the one that did the 'Not a rich man's sport series' right? Where she did every single GP but on an minimum wage workers affordable budget to show you can still do it! I love that series!" Charles exclaimed.

"Dude, who doesn't know Y/N, I grew up watching her because she was only like 3 years younger than me and she was incredibly relatable. I watch her whole groups videos" Alex admits before Lando bursts out laughing.

"Okay, so how haven't you realized she's in your guy's chat and is gifting subs to you!" Lando laughs, he starts DMing you on Instagram asking for you discord.

"SHE'S WHAT" Charles exclaims, before looking over into chat to see them spamming your name.

"No way" George says quietly.

"OMG Lily! Come here, our wife is in my twitch chat" Alex shouts out before everyone goes quite.

"Huh?" Lando asks with a little bit of a choke.

"Lily and I agreed we can have one genuine celebrity crush, but its gotta be mutual and its Y/N so she's our shared wife now" he explains making the rest of them all laugh.

"Hello everyone!" you say as you joined the discord call before all hell breaks loose.

"I cant believe this right now" George mutters to himself, Alex was yelling to trying to get Lily to come join him and to come on camera to say hi to you.

You launched up your own stream so the boys could also say hello to you properly.

"Hey stream! What's going on, yes you guys will be meeting some very cool people today. We have Williams Racing Driver George Russell, Red Bull Racing Driver Alexander Albon, Ferrari Racing Driver Charles Leclerc and lastly Mclaren Racing Driver Lando Norris joining us today" you introduce before they all say hello on discord. Your chat was half and half, either spamming that you were streaming with the zoom zoom car men, and the other half asking who the hell these people were.

"Holy shit, there's 30k people watching us online right now" Lando says looking at your view count going up.

"So, Lando suggested that you guys interview me, or like give me a quick fire quiz about 2019 considering i was there for all races!"

"Ohhh okay sounds interesting! I'm first!" Alex offers and you smile at the camera.

"Where was my first race with Red Bull?" Alex asks and you smile.

"Spa right?"

"Ding Ding" Lando shouts loudly making you flinch and laugh at the sound.

"Okay my turn! How many podiums did i have in 2019, and where were they" Charles asks.

"Oh come on, he wins in Spa, he wins in Monza ... you had two" you recite the quote of the year to him and see a big cheesy grin on his face.

"My turn how many points did i get in my rookie season of 2019" George asks and you sigh.

"Such potential there George but unfortunately you came out with 0 points!" you shake your head sadly.

"Okay me next hmmmm, my rookie season was wasn't great either... I don't know what to ask. Oooo what was my highest position?" he asks and you look stumped for a second.

"P6?" you ask more than answer him.

"Actually fella's i may have to check that myself" Lando pauses not quite sure.

"Why on earth would you ask a question you don't know the answer too..." you exclaim in outrage, looking to the camera with a 'wtf' look.

"Look, last year was ... well I don't even know how to describe last year!" Lando exclaims before he cheers.

"You were right it was in fact P6 i got that in Bahrain and Austria" he explains.

"Look, even though i had a weird and wacky year from staying in a hostel in Belgium to a Love Hotel in Japan ... I remembered everything from that year!" you say backing yourself up.

"Okay back to me, where was my highest place drive in Torro Rosso?" Alex asks.

"Oh fuck, in Torro Rosso, mmmmmm. Oh my gosh my mind has gone blank for any races higher than P8 for you. P8?" you ask sheepishly knowing its not but its the only race you could think off.

"Nope it was P6 in Germany!" he laughs and you sigh with an 'oh damn it' and a light smack on your desk.

"Fuck"

"Okay me me! Who did i race for before i moved to Ferrari?" Charles questions and you role your eyes before looking over to chat who are spamming Tifosi.

"Alfa Romeo Sauber and lets be for real you slayed that rookie season pookie" you say, and everyone laughs.

"God what is this pandemic turning us into... slay ... what even is that?" Lando ask like one of those old middle aged mums who squint when you show her something on your phone.

"SLAYYYYY" you scream and chat start to spam the emote you made for it.

"Okay, well what was my lowest race finish?" George asks.

"Erm including DNF'S?" you ask and see him shake his head before saying no on his stream.

"P19, you avoiding that 20 like I avoid my ex-man boi" you chide making everyone laugh.

"France is not you friend" you admit, looking up to double check you were right, showing chat George's statistics from the 2019 races.

"Okay, and me what is the name of the new esports gaming org that I am going to launch soon"

"Quadrant, which chat... he wants me to leave to leave fnatic for them. Chat what do i do?" you ask and chat spams you with yes or no's and its funny to see the split and the argument. Twitter would have a field day over this later.

"Oh god Y/N why do you have to create chaos everywhere you go!" Alex laughs before he makes a weird noise.

You change tabs to check his screen, and see Lily. You gasp loudly making sure everyone can hear.

"What?" George asks.

"Alex who is that beautiful woman on your screen and is she single" you ask, knowing full well its Lily his girlfriend since last year. You'd seen their posts on instagram.

"No way, she didn't just say that. Your lying" you hear Lily mumble before looking unsurely at the camera and chat to see if they would tell her it was all a joke.

"Y/N this is Lily, she's my ..."

"Yeah i don't care about that lemme talk to her, cos she's gorgeous" you say and Alex hands Lily the headphones.

"Hey darling" you try and say in a seductive voice and you see Lily fold on stream, banging the desk lightly and biting her lip.

"Your hand in marriage please Y/N?" she asks and you nod enthusiastically to chat.

"Lily, we spoke about this... she's are shared wife" Alex admits making you stifle a laugh before returning serious.

"Alex, get away. You aren't involved here!" you say before everyone laughs, joking how they feel like they are interrupting your's and Lily's first date.

Afterwards you spent a lot of time streaming with them, you couldn't travel as much as you used to for your YouTube channel so you ventured out of your usual stuff, going as far as to start a podcast and join a gaming org.

It was even sadder, not streaming with Charles, George and Alex anymore. Sometimes Lando continued to stream, but after the pandemic you didn't get to see that silly and chilled out side of them as much.

You'd gained... and managed to save a lot of money in the pandemic. So come the 2022 season, you were offered a 'small' and 'unprofessional' job by Formula One, you were basically your own social media for them. You were given a paddock pass to every race, you were given podcast privileges with pretty much whoever you wanted and they paid you all to give them more traction.

You created the opposite of your first video where you went on the best flights and the snazziest hotels, even going on Max's private jet for one event.

Everyone loved it, and you still did your normal videos on the side, like day in the life, and those aesthetic travel videos that everyone secretly loves, lifestyle and beauty videos etc.

Apart from the fact that the pandemic was awful and harmed many and really created a rift between some of you friendships and family and had, at one point got you nervous about your income, had actually paid of and turned out to have one of the best outcomes for your future in content creation.

A/N: My heart really goes out to anyone and their families who were affected by the pandemic, it was an insane time for all of us and is shocking that it genuinely happened in our life time. But it taught everyone so much, and we all learned a lot while this was occuring!

Taglist:

@littlesatanicassholebitch @hockey-racing-fubol @laura-naruto-fan1998 @22yuki @simxican @sinofwriting @lewisroscoelove @cmleitora @stupidandunnecessary @clayra-g @daemyratwst @honey-belden @moonypixel @lauralarsen @vader-is-hot @ironcowboycopnickel @itsjustkhaos @the-untamed-soul @beebo86 @happylittlereader @ziejustme @lou-larcher5 @thewulf @purplephantomwolf @chasing-liberosis @chillyleclerc @chanthereader @annoyingmoonballoon @summissss @evieepepi08 @havaneseoger08 @celesteblack08 @gulphulp @fandom1ruined2me @celebstories @starfusionsworld @jspitwall @sierruhh @georgeparisole @dakotatankbig @youcannotcancelquidditch @zzonsbeek @tallbrownhairsarcastic @mellowarcadefun @ourteenagetragedy @otako5811 @countingstacksandpanicattacks @peachiicherries @formulas-bitch @cherry-piee @hopexcroc @mirrorball-6 @spilled-coffee-cup @mehrmonga @bigsimperika @blueberry64857959 @eiraethh @lilypadlover @curseofhecate @alliwantisadonut @the-fem1n1ne-urge @21stcenturytaegi @dark-night-sky-99 @spideybv28 @i-wish-this-was-me @tallrock35 @butterfly-lover @barnestatic @landossainz @darleneslane @barcelonaloverf1life @r0nnsblog @ilove-tswizzle @kapsylia @laneyspaulding19

[zombvic]

TINDER IRL PART one (harry lewis x reader)

summary : in which y/n gets invited to the sidemen tinder irl (usa edition) and meets a certain brit and their instant friendship slowly progresses into something bigger

face claim : no one right now (kendall jenner later)

notes : reader is like a 2019 ICON like disstracks against the paul brothers, ricegum etc.. now STILL doing youtube but on a much more lowkey basis. also im sorry but i had to add that the reader is an f1 fan IM SORRY (im locked in as an f1 girlie) 😵 yall im not american or even close to a native english speaker (#slavicstruggles) but i tried making the readeramerican cause i tried to do the american la gf x british bloke bf xx god bless 'merica RAAAAAH. also i used lines from like all the videos and made my own cause the lines from this video were insane.. last also, don't be a ghost reader 🧟‍♂️🧟‍♂️

pairings : harry lewis x reader , sidemen x platonic!reader , all the other youtuber in the videos x platonic!reader

warnings : drugs (ketamine joke)

You got invited to the SIDEMEN Tinder In Real Life youtube video. You are acutely aware to what the Sidemen are and you've seen their videos before. Now to be fair, the genres between your channel and their channels were pretty different. The Sidemen were known for football challenges, those 100$ vs 100,000$ challenges and other things with a similar vibe. You on the other hand, you did vlogs, lifestyle hack and tips, in your time you've achieved some disstracks and occasionally broke down some formula 1 grand prix weekend.

The moment you saw the instagram dm from the Sidemen official account you weren't sure how to react. Should you be excited? scared? worried? yeah.. all. It was the Sidemen, Logan Paul, Mike and George (idk who Mike and George but who cares).

Eventually you accepted the offer and waited till the day you had to be "picked up" by kinda random men for 5 minutes straight. The day came, you got dressed for the video shoot, they made you wait with the other girls until they called your name and then you walked in.

"Hi, I'm (your name). I'm 24 and i'm from Newark, New Jersey" (go devs go) You've practiced that line like 50 times before you left, not because you wanted to come out of this video with a new man but because you didn't want to embarrass yourself lmao.

"Hi, I'm Vikk. I'm 26 and are you from Tennessee, because you're the only ten i see"

"Would've been funny if i hadn't just said im from New Jersey dude, no sorry"

"Hello, I'm Logan-"

"No. Complicated history" you said as you swiped left.

"One chance please"

"Alright, BUT u gotta watch it tho"

"Okay. SO. If i were a pizza delivery guy, i'd be giving YOU the tip"

"Ew no sorry lmfao.. that was weak as fuck"

"Alright wow, Hello, I'm Tobi. I'm 31 and they say that kissing is a language of love, so would you mind starting a conversation with me?"

"Sure go on.. yes. I love that"

Hello, My name is Ethan and let only latex stand between our love.

"Yeah thats funny.. alright, go on"

"Yo, I'm KSI. I'm 30 and you know how they say skin is the largest organ on the human body? Well.. Not in my case."

"Lmao, yes go on"

“Hello, I'm Mike. I'm 37 and girl, you don't need no vibrator when you got this Pickled Dick.”

"Jesus Christ. No, get out"

"Hi, My name is Simon and.. Simon says you want to swipe right"

"Lmao. I love that, Yes"

"Sup, I'm George and I’m peanut butter. You’re jelly. Let’s have sex"

"Jeeesus, that’s crazy bro... no"

"Hello, My name is Josh and I find your lack of nudity disturbing"

"No, I'm so sorry" (guys i love freya sm i couldnt do this)

"Uhm, Hello. I'm Harry. I'm 26 years old and what do ketamine and your underpants have in common?"

"I don't know" you said looking at the blonde-ish man confused.

"I'd like to sniff them both."

The whole room fell into a laughter, you included. "Yes"

"BUT I GET A NO?" Logan exclaims. "What a scam"

WHY DID YOU SAY NO?

(NO : Logan, Josh, Mike, Vikk and George)

"For Logan i think we left this in 2019 and rightfully so. For Josh i dont really know tbh, i just thought his line couldve been better. Mike, i think you know why i said no. Vikk.. Im gonna be honest i dont even remember what youve said but im sure i had my reasons and George, you couldve been waaaaaay smoother mate.. tough luck"

YALL. this is part one because i cant be arsed and put it all right here right now 😁😁😁

[totaly-obsessed]

Could you write the oldest request with Aitana Bonmati and maybe make more parts of it with flashbacks if important moments (First Meeting, first kiss, first time pregnant, first daughters birth, first birthday, meeting Aitanas parents) there are many more moments you could write. If you don't write requests at the moment, I understand and don't put pressure on your self, if you don't like it don't do it.

Always keep the fun at writingand if you are not having fun stop it, because if you don't like it the you will never write as good as a story you really had fun writing

Thanks for sharing these incredible story's with us

Linda

Aitana Bonmatí x reader request

-> Aitana hides a wife and eventually a child from her teammates

-> also requested by this anon - I hope you like it

-> Talk of IVF - Information from Google, 'Y/N' once, a lot longer than expected

➳ Masterlist

•─────⋅☾ ☽⋅─────•

Doing something for the first time was always scary, most people knew that – and so did your wife. Well, now she was your wife, a couple of years ago she was just ‘Aitana Bonmatí’ the next person on your list of people you would need to photograph. That was your job after all, being Barcelona Femenís new team photographer after the last one was let go after facing harassment claims made by the players. 

The first friend you made on the team was Caroline, who spoke English so that you could communicate, and it didn’t take long until Lieke warmed up to you as well. They made it a lot easier to communicate – you didn’t speak Spanish and most of the Spaniards, didn’t speak English, but you still managed to talk to each other – it was a mix of both languages, as everybody tried to learn. 

Meeting Aitana back in 2019 was quite funny, the young Midfielder was next in line to get her photos for the season taken and she was nervous. A new photographer, who didn’t speak Spanish? How was this going to work?  

But as soon as she saw you, she knew that you had already stolen her heart, ready to keep it forever. Aitana was a blushing and stuttering mess, while you tried to get through the shoot as fast as possible, thinking that the Catalan hated you. It was a lot of awkward back and forth until she finally asked you out on a date.

It would be the first of many, and because you had taken such a long time to even get to this point, both of you were now mediocre at the other's respective language, making conversation much easier and a lot more fun-er.

---

---

The first kiss came with the third date when the Spaniard couldn’t wait any longer, and what better place than her bed? The footballer had invited you to her apartment and you had cooked together, joking around the entire evening until she could see your eyes droop.

“Let’s go to bed linda, hmm?” It was no secret that you loved when she called you beautiful, so with blushing cheeks and shy smiles you stumbled to the brunette’s bedroom, who excitedly pulled you after her by your hand. 

Soft giggles filled the room when Aitana just pushed you on the bed, claiming that you ‘need to relax more’ before she started massaging your shoulders. A certain tension filled the room and ultimately the Spaniard couldn’t handle it – she grasped your ching gently, turning your head towards her. 

She was stunning.

Soft brown eyes stared deep into yours, seeing you for who you really were before she gently closed the gap between your faces. It had been the best first kiss there could be (at least when asking you or Aitana), and the first time followed shortly later, she really couldn’t wait any longer.

Safe to say, that neither of you would ever forget that date.

---

---

Meeting your girlfriend's Parents was quite scary for you, after all, your Spanish still wasn’t that good – but Aitana made sure to praise every new word you learned with a gentle kiss to your forehead, proud of you, that you wanted to learn her language and culture. 

But when you met them, all your worries went out the window – they were so nice and very much interested in learning English as both of them were teachers of the Catalonian language and literature.

The evening was nice as Rosa taught you how to make Aitana’s favorite dish from home – she even gave you all of the recipe cards she had originally written for her daughter. While the footballer loved food, she tried to stay far away from the kitchen – luckily for both of you, you enjoyed it.

During that time Vicent stood in the garden with his daughter, giving her ‘the speech’ he had planned for you – but just like his wife and daughter, you had quickly wormed your way into his heart, making him turn on his daughter. But she could tell that the threats held no real weight to them, the sly smirk on his face giving everything away.

Rosa gave you all the credit for dinner when you really had just peeled potatoes and observed – but Aitana, none the wiser complimented you the whole night through, pressing appreciative kisses to your cheeks, forehead, and even your hair, while her parents watched. 

They were in awe, wondering how you had gotten their daughter's attention when she had never been in anybody else. Football had been the only thing on her mind until she met you. Vicent and Rosa were so incredibly happy for their daughter – sure seeing her successful and fighting for equality was amazing, but seeing her so utterly in love? That was just something else.

On that very night, Vicent had given your girlfriend a little box with two rings inside of it.

---

--- 

A year of dating had passed and you were living together in a new apartment when Aitana popped the big question. When you started dating she had told you, that it wasn’t a question of ‘if’ you were getting married, but rather a question of ‘when’. You had only blushed, her certainty made you feel giddy. There was just something about it.

The proposal wasn’t some big gesture but rather a cozy evening together, where she pulled the box out and got on her knees when you were getting more wine.

There had been tears, and obviously, you had said yes after sinking to your knees and embracing Aitana in a tear-stained kiss.

The rings were beautiful, one of them was a little thicker than the second one, but both had beautiful vines with leaves engraved in them – multiple little diamonds were embedded in the bands. 

“They belonged to mi abuela y abuelo.” Aitana was also crying, while she knew that you would say yes, she was still overrun with emotions. “We can get new ones if you want… I just thought th-“

You didn’t let her finish rambling, cooing a little at how nervous she was. “No – I love them, Tana. I’ll have to thank your abuela y abuelo the next time that I see them, huh?”

 After meeting her parents for the first time Aitana took you to her grandparent's grave – family was important to her. 

The actual wedding was held in a small circle of the closest friends and family members – the Spaniard loved keeping you to herself even with her huge family. The team obviously knew you as their photographer but Laia Codina was the only one invited from the team – sworn to secrecy.

It had been a dream.

---

---

During your honeymoon, the conversation about having kids came up again and again. You had obviously talked about it before, but now as a married couple, everything seemed much more plausible. You had everything you needed for the perfect family life you had always dreamed of – except a kid, obviously. 

After carefully considering your options you landed on co-IVF. Thanks to two well-paying jobs, you had the necessary funds, and both of you wanted to be actively, emotionally as well as physically involved.

The decision on who would carry out the pregnancy and who would be the provider of the genetic load came quite easily – Aitana was just at the start of her big career, important seasons would surely come, so you would be the one to get pregnant.

While it was typically the younger person who would be the genetic mother, Aitana was only a year older than you and had just turned 22 – she had a good ovarian reserve and the genetic screening showed no problems, so you could go through with the process. Your uterus had also been deemed fit to carry the baby, as was your overall health.

The process was long and tedious – Aitana had to inject herself with hormones for twelve days, to stimulate egg growth, before the final injection which would trigger ovulation. After that, the eggs are retrieved and the mature ones are fertilized by the sperm of an anonymous donor you had carefully picked out together. One of the embryos gets placed in your uterus after up to six days of growing, while you have prepared your body with progesterone and estrogen in order to make sure that your uterus lining is at the correct thickness. 

But the hardest part came after the embryo transfer – A two-week wait before you could take a pregnancy test. It was pure torture, the only good thing was that you saw your wife every day, making the hormones much more manageable.

How the team didn’t find out was truly a miracle, they must have thought that there was something seriously wrong with their teammate when Aitana started to be more careful – not knowing that she was growing a load of eggs.

After the dreaded two weeks you finally took the test together – no matter how much you protested Aitana joined you in the bathroom, she really wanted to be here for this. In solidarity the Spaniard had sipped water alongside you – so now you both needed to pee. 

After taking the first ‘First Response Early Result wand test’ test you waited anxiously on the couch. This was the best test kit for at home, your wife had made sure of that. The five minutes felt even longer than the two weeks – it was painful. When the timer was up, your eyes met. Together you turned the small device over.

No. It couldn’t be…

Out of shock, you took a second test, and after that showed the same result, you took a third one. Tears brimmed in your eyes, hands shaking so much that Aitana took the test out of them, turning it around – it was the same result.

Positive.

It had worked on the first try.

---

---

As happy as you were to be pregnant, it really was a bitch. The first trimester was the worst, you had morning sickness all day long. Why do they even call it that? Morning sickness?

You still went to work with an upset stomach, extreme tiredness, and hurting breasts. Aitana tried to look out for you, as subtle as she could. Whenever at a match she brought you a chair, just carrying it after you so that you could sit down. She also took over the cooking so that you could rest as much as possible. But with all the problems the meals got smaller and more frequent.

As hard as it was, you loved it – so did Aitana.

The second trimester came with back pain, stretch marks, and patches of darker skin over the cheeks, forehead, nose, and upper lip – the ‘mask of pregnancy’. But it also came with a slightly showing belly in the beginning until you could fully see it in your work clothes.

In week 23 of pregnancy, Aitana had the scare of her life. As usual, you were cuddled up on the couch, your back to her stomach as you tried to edit a couple of pictures in this position. Your wife's wandering hands were just making their way down to your pants, trying to tease you when she suddenly felt a nudge. “¿Qué fue eso?” You had felt it before, a gentle fluttering in your tummy, or like a tumbling sensation. “Linda? What was that?” 

The baby had started to move, and Aitana fell in love all over again. She obviously knew that it could happen any day now, but actually feeling it? That was something else. 

With your protruding belly, the other girls started to notice as well – it was Ana who discovered it first. You had come to her with the Club's Social Media phone, needing her to record a quick video for Instagram.

“Oie! Did I miss something?”

At first, you didn’t really know what she was talking about – completely forgetting that you had given up looking for baggy shirts and just worn one that was a bit tighter.

“Whoopsie?”

On that very day, Aitana decided to tell the team. She didn’t want to hide anymore. While having you to herself was incredible, she wanted to brag about you and the unborn child she already loved so much. 

When you entered the gym room at the time you were told, everybody looked at you. “¿Cómo estás mi amor?” Alexia was the first at your side, and even if she saw your belly, she didn’t say anything when she kissed both of your cheeks.

“I know you already know her, but I wanted to re-introduce you. So… Meet the love of my life, and my wife – Y/N.”

The silence was swallowing you whole, Aitana’s hand in yours as she gently squeezed it, trying to calm your nerves. Just seconds later the gym erupted in cheers and you were pulled into hug after hug by the girls who knew that there was something going on between Aitana and you – but they never would have guessed just how close you were.

“Is it Aitana’s baby then?” – and just like that Ana made the team erupt in screams again, as if they were just looking at you for the first time. 

---

---

For the third trimester, you were sent home by Jonatan, Aitana’s training plan was heavily adjusted and her game time dwindled down. While she would have hated that at any different time – she was happy to be with you every single day of your pregnancy. 

She helped you wherever she could, showering, making dinner, putting shoes on, and going on walks. When you started to nest, she never complained, just offering her hands whenever something didn’t work the way you wanted it to.

The Barca girls were a big help to their fellow teammate – listening to her rambling on and on about you and the little one, affectionally called ‘pequeño’ by everyone. No one knew the sex yet, you didn’t want to know until the baby was there. There were organized bets going on, organized by Mapi and Jenni – team boy currently held more money.

Your due date was calculated for the 23rd of May, with the Champions League final falling on the 21st. It took a lot of convincing on your side to make Aitana go with the team. “Tana this could be the most important game in your life!”

“But what if pequeño comes early?”

The Spaniard insisted on staying home until the day of departure came. You had reassured her countless times, that you would be perfectly fine – after all the baby wasn’t supposed to come yet, and what baby would actually be punctual? Definitely not yours. After all it haf your wife’s DNA, and Aitana was always late.

In the end, it was Rosa who convinced her daughter to travel to Italy with the team.

The loss of 3 – 1 hit hard, especially against Lyon but an excited hum filled the plane back that was originally supposed to take off the next evening – but when Aitana had gotten the call that your contractions started every existing plan got thrown overboard and just two hours later they were on their way to Barcelona.

It was safe to say that little Mira Linda Bonmatí made the memory of losing the Champions League finale the day before just that much better.

Now an entire year later you could barely believe it – your little girl was already turning one and her Mamí was getting ready for another final – this time with you and her little mascot by her side – making it a hundred times better already.

While standing in the crowd you couldn’t help but laugh, thinking back on how you had managed to hide your relationship, marriage, and pregnancy from the Barca Femení squad for such a long time. Now you couldn’t imagine life without them – 22 very eager Tia’s who would gladly look after Mia any chance they got.

[bengiyo]

An Apology to Ossan's Love and The Novelist

I'm writing this post today as a formal apology to both Ossan's Love and The Novelist for avoiding them in 2018-2019 due to general negative fandom takes about them. Both shows are great, and I should have watched them six years ago.

I recently watched the Pornographer series thanks to @lurkingshan burning some of her coupons to make me properly engage with the series. In that series I found one of the most compelling expressions of internalized homophobia I’ve ever seen. Rio was not only cut off from being sexual with other people, but he felt like he couldn’t even be a proper man.

Later, in Mood Indigo, we got to see the messed-up way Rio became an erotic novelist but also finally seemed to connect with an important part of himself. He also found a mentor who, despite his proclivities, became an important paternal figure to Rio.

Finally, in Playback, Rio finally faced his own insecurities and accepted that Haruhiko loves him and reciprocated it. At every stage of this story, they are able to communicate so much of their story through the sex that’s happening. We’re applauding depictions of sex happening in the genre now that this series was doing half a decade ago.

I decided to give Ossan’s Love a second try when I saw @isaksbestpillow getting so excited about the second season and providing context for the original show. With Ossan’s Love, I understand why people might have bounced off this series right away. A lot of folks don’t enjoy the way the Japanese do comedy, Haruta is intentionally unlikeable at the beginning, and I’ve seen concerns about the boss either being a predator or that his feelings would be treated as a joke.

Thankfully, I tend to enjoy Japanese comedy and found the show hilarious! I was laughing out loud almost every single episode because of multiple characters, but most especially Yoshida Kotaro as the boss. This show generated so much of its comedy from the core characterization of each character, so every joke landed so smoothly for me.

Something I really liked about this show was that it never said we were wrong for disliking Haruta for being a mess and a slob. He cannot take care of himself, and he barely gets better at it before the end of the show. I like that Maki breaking up with him didn’t make him suddenly straighten up his ways about this and become a fully-functioning housekeeper, but he did get better about doing some chores even as the chief started taking care of him. Haruta isn’t the easiest character to like on the domestic front, but he is good at his job and he is a kind character. I like that you have to figure out why these guys like the mess that is Haruta, because I like the audience has to think about what in men that gay people find attractive. Is that a rosy-eyed read? Yes. I don’t are.

As for the boss, he never uses his position over Haruta, and they’re also in sales. It’s not as egregious to me as it would feel in other positions. I also like that his attraction to Haruta isn’t a joke, but the fact that he’s older and maybe isn’t speaking the language of the youth is very funny. He’s an extremely endearing character and I love Kurosawa Musashi.

So, this is my apology to both of these shows for letting negative fan opinions stop me from facing these shows properly. Both of them were great. I’m currently working through the Ossan’s Love: In the Sky season to get to the movie and new show.

[thebroccolination]

People Think Krist Is Homophobic (but He Isn’t)

[TW: discussions of homophobia, death threats, "the rape filter joke", etc.]

Last September, I made a thread about The Whole Krist Thing, and I'd like to make a version here on Tumblr as well.

NOTE: My being a queer fan of Krist doesn’t override the feelings or opinions of other queer people. I fully understand that time on this planet is limited and you don't need to exert precious energy into researching an actor. The reason I'm making this is to provide context for people who are new to the fandom or just wondering why Krist is known as homophobic.

- Why I Made the Twitter Thread -

As a queer international fan living abroad, my understanding of Thailand, Thai culture, and Thai language is extremely limited. Like most of us, I rely entirely on translations, both official and fan-made.

After watching SOTUS for the first time in 2020, I saw English-speaking fans claiming that Krist Perawat, the actor who played Arthit, was homophobic. And it wasn't just one or two people saying it. It was dozens. Hundreds. That called for some research. I loved Arthit, and Krist's empathetic portrayal of him didn't mesh with the angry guy in the Instagram photo I was seeing passed around.

I'd made a number of queer Peraya fans on Twitter, so I went to them individually and asked, "What's this about Krist being homophobic?" As queer fans who were knowledgable and openly fond of Krist, I wanted to hear their side of things.

They sent me links and photos and videos and translations that thoroughly explained how Krist's reputation for being homophobic had gotten so out of control. The problem: those things weren't compiled in one place, and they were all on Twitter where the Asian Peraya fandom is most active. Interfans, meanwhile, took the worst of everything they could find and compiled it into contextless videos for Instagram, YouTube, TikTok, etc. Since the vast majority of Krist's fanbase is spread across Asia and many of them don't engage with the international fandom, it's no wonder to me that the homophobia thing has become so ubiquitous over the years.

It's a paradox where, in order to see the evidence of Krist's allyship, you kind of have to be a fan already. Or you have to know which keywords to use to navigate Twitter's nightmare of a search function (I know, Tumblr is worse). While I made that thread, I was regularly texting Peraya I knew things like, "Do you know where that one interview from 2019 is?" or, "Did you take a screenshot of the marriage equality post he made last month?"

The thread was difficult to make, and I'm a fan! What I know of Krist, I know because I've been a fan for three years and I have access to information that fans who have been here much longer can find.

I also procrastinated on making it for ages. I knew the amount of vitriol people hold against him, and I just wanted to enjoy my time in fandom quietly without calling waves of anger and hate to my carefully curated little corner of sunshine.

Then Krist was in a car accident.

And even though he was reportedly driving safely and slowly, Thailand is notorious for its poorly maintained roads and a high number of traffic accidents. Only months after receiving his first driver's license, Krist's car flipped upside down, and he had to reassure fans from the hospital that he was physically all right, just shaken.

Meanwhile, some international fans thought it was funny.

And that's when I started making the thread.

So, with all that said, let's start with Krist's allyship, because I know most of us agree that that's the bare minimum for an actor working in the BL industry and profiting off the queer community.

- Acts of Allyship -

In the early days of their SOTUS fame, Krist and Singto were interviewed about the LGBTQ+ community.

Acceptance and equality is something that the LGBTQ community still struggles to achieve up to this day. But both Singto and Krist believe that this should not be the case. “They are just humans. They are like me, and they are like everyone,” Krist claims. Furthermore, he mentions that we should all be given the freedom to love anyone we want to love. “It’s just natural,” he says.

“They don’t have to understand now,” Singto says, referring to those who can’t grasp same-sex relationships. “One day, when they find their true love, they will realize that love is the same no matter the gender.” Krist adds, “Gender is not relevant when it comes to love. But in case some people still don’t understand this in time, what’s important is that we all give due respect to each other at the end of the day.”

He's also educated himself in colors representative of the LGBTQ+ community.

When Krist and Singto attended an award ceremony for their photoshoot in the gay magazine Attitude, Krist shared a sentiment that he gave to a queer friend of his. "If no one accepts you, you can stay with me, because I accept you for who you are." [Paraphrased]

Despite Thailand's current government leaning on BL series as a new soft power, it's still very conservative, and its people are to this day fighting to see equal marriage recognized.

Krist often adds his voice to this fight on Instagram, specifically as someone who works in the BL industry. These were in 2021 and 2022:

And, like many young people in Thailand, Krist also seems to support the Move Forward party. Earlier this week, he used an orange heart in a tweet to encourage people to go out and vote in the most recent election. One of the many things the Move Forward party is pushing for is the legalization of same-sex marriage "with the same rights and responsibilities as their heterosexual peers", which the current military government actively does not.

- His Circle -

When I was making my Twitter thread, I hesitated before including mention of his queer friends and coworkers. I knew how that would sound, but in the same way I felt it was important to mention my own queerness, I also think it's important to highlight not just the presence of queer people in his life, but how comfortable they are with him.

As I said in my Twitter thread, having queer friends isn’t indicative of anything substantial, but I do think it’s important to look at how those queer friends interact with him. If you’re queer, you know firsthand which friends you’d be physically affectionate with. The entertainment industry is its own world, of course, and the weight and meaning of relationships and connections can be different, but for all Krist's fame and popularity, he's not so famous or remotely powerful that faking a friendship with him is going to get them very far.

Among his queer friends, you've got Jennie who babies him, Godji who treats him like her son, and Oat who still adores him years after SOTUS. All of them queer, all of them visibly affectionate in a way that feels authentic, at least to me.

On the professional side of things, I think the best example of someone who wouldn't bother with him if he were homophobic is Golf Tanwarin Sukkhapisit. In 2022, Krist worked on The War of Flowers with Golf, a nonbinary queer activist, former MP, and director of The Eclipse. Since they're not just a queer person in the industry but a vocal queer activist who's made incredible progress for the community in their country, I value their judgment of his character.

Again, the reason I bring up these people isn't to say, "Look! Queer people! He knows some!"

It's to point out that he's close to them, and it disrespects their judgment to casually assume that they’d cosy up to a homophobe.

It's a small point, yes, but it was important to me when I first became a fan to see that queer people who know him personally had "vetted" him.

- Growth -

For this next section, I'll address three things I see brought up most often: the rape filter joke, the rumor that Krist said he doesn't like watching men kiss, and the claim that he's only doing BL because rent is due.

1) The Rape Filter Joke

In 2017, Krist and Singto were on a live with (I think) two other friends. They were testing out different filters, and when they got to a blur effect, one of them (one of the friends, I think) said it looked like the filter they put over victims of sexual assault on the news. They all laughed, including Krist and Singto.

I can't find a video of the original event, but we do have a translation of the apology he gave in 2018, and the public apology he made in 2020 when the video resurfaced again.

While this is unfortunate, and it would be nice if he hadn’t done it, I’m more interested in how he responds to criticism and his growth afterward. The incident was in 2017, but even speaking on it in 2020, he didn't make excuses for himself.

He apologized, accepted culpability, educated himself, and has never repeated it.

2) Krist "Doesn't Like to Watch Men Kiss"

There's also a claim that goes around that Krist said he doesn't like to watch men kiss. But that isn't what he said.

The subtitled interview that this claim was taken from has been split into two parts, and I think a lot of people have only seen the first half, if they've seen either.

(Also, my deepest apologies, but I'm linking you to Twitter for the video clips.)

In the first clip, the hosts tease Krist about Singto's sex scene with another actor in Close Friends. I can't speak to the nuances of what Krist is saying in Thai, but in the subtitles, he's basically saying that as a guy, he doesn't want to watch stuff like that and just skips past Singto and his partner to one of the other couples, like the male-female pairs. With just this clip, I agree that it doesn't sound great.

But in the second clip, the hosts tease Krist until he admits that the "stuff" he doesn't want to watch is Singto specifically kissing people who aren't him. Krist's jealousy, especially when it comes to Singto, is a well-trod fanservice joke.

3) He's Doing BL Only for the Money

I mean, I have no idea, but it'd be very weird if this was true, because he hasn't been in a BL since 2018 (if you count Our Skyy), and he's doing very well for himself financially.

Listen, this is probably the least serious people get when they criticize him, but I'm including it because why not, this is already a thesis.

From what I understand based on actors' comments, BL roles don't make a lot of money for the actors. (Boun even quoted a surprisingly low daily salary recently, and I'll share it here if I find it again.) Of course, I imagine Krist has enough fame and clout that he gets paid more than most actors, but to be frank, he absolutely makes more from all his other work.

Apart from the acting work he's done, he hosts two music shows, he starred in a musical recently, GMM just flew him to Japan for the first leg of his Asia concert tour, he runs a restaurant with Wave, and he has a bunch of sponsorships. And that's off the top of my head. The car from his accident in 2021 was a luxury model, and he replaced it with another pretty soon afterward. I'm not bragging for him or anything, but the "he's just doing BL for the money" is an odd thing to say when he probably already earns more than most without doing it.

It would have been a better argument back in 2016 when Krist's family was deep in debt. Krist's said that his main motivation to join the entertainment industry back then was to pay off that debt for his family, and he did so with the money he made from SOTUS.

Krist has spoken in the past about wanting to do more BL roles, but GMM preferred that he work with Singto. Now that Singto's left GMM (likely to start his own agency), Krist is in Be My Favorite, so I think his explanation tracks.

It's also worth mentioning that you can do something for the money and also love what you do. In the case of SOTUS, Arthit wasn't just a role that made him money, he's the character who changed Krist's life. He honors Arthit to this day by always wearing the bracelet he wore to his audition and by naming his music studio "SUN St." after Arthit.

(This is a very minor point, but I don't think a homophobe would cherish a queer role to quite that extent even if it was their kick-off point. If anything, they'd probably try to bury the role and pretend their real success started later.)

- Perception of Sexuality -

I think the reason the IG story hits people so hard is because Krist's reaction makes it seem like he's horrified that people could even think he's gay. My understanding is that he was tired of people interrogating him about his sexuality.

Krist is very openly affectionate with the people he loves, regardless of gender, which is clear in the photos with his friends above. Thus, he's always been like that with Singto. They hug before every show, they sleep on each other, cuddle, what have you. All the stuff of people who have developed a tight bond over the years.

When Krist was asked if he was afraid that that would put off potential partners in the future (which, good god, the questions they're asked) Krist said he doesn't care how people perceive his sexuality.

This was in 2018, the year Our Skyy aired, and he's said similar things in passing before and since.

- Conclusion -

All of what I've posted here is just a slice of what's out there. This is just the stuff I could find with reliable English translations because I'm making this for an English-speaking audience. Krist's fans already know all of this, which is why he has queer fans in the first place, and a lot of them are just too tired by hate fatigue to keep correcting misinformation.

I'm not trying to get every person in the world to like Krist, I promise. He's not perfect. He's a loud mess, and while he has four cats who love him, they're also exhausted by him. I just happen to like loud, obnoxious people, especially when they're as kind as he is.

There are plenty of Thai actors I don't vibe with for any number of reasons ranging from serious to petty. You have my written permission to dislike some people.

The Instagram story he posted was a bad move, we're all agreed. He agrees. He's apologized multiple times over the years. Whether one accepts his apologies is each person’s right, and I understand if this is enough to turn people away.

I just hope it's clear that he's been a staunch ally of the queer community and remains so to this day.

Personally, I'm more upset about the question.

This isn't a question you ask anyone.

And this wasn't the first fan to ask him.

According to people who have been fans from the SOTUS era, Krist and Singto were both relentlessly dogged by fans about 1) their sexualities and 2) details about their relationship with each other. We've all likely seen it happen to actors today, but back in 2016, there weren't hundreds of BL actors vying for the spotlight, so the spotlight hit Krist and Singto in a way that we can't imagine today. Most of us, myself included, arrived in this fandom long after SOTUS's meteoric rise to popularity that ended up saving GMMTV from bankruptcy, but given how many fans still behave like they're entitled to know an actor's sexuality, I think it's safe to trust that it was relentless. Fans accusing Kit Connor of "queerbaiting" as recently as 2022 is proof of that.

At the end of the day, there are plenty of reasons to dislike Krist, just like there are to dislike any person on this planet. He's hyperactive, he's whiny, etc. He's not flawless, but I think he's more than shown through his actions that he isn't homophobic, either.

He's not some actor playing queer roles for clout. He's vocally supportive of queer rights, and he backed that up this week in the polls by voting for the most progressive party in his country who are actively pushing for marriage equality.

But like I said, you don't have to like him, so I'll end this post with a quote from a friend who doesn't like Krist for the funniest reason I've ever heard:

"I don't think Krist is homophobic. I just don't like him because he reminds me of every kindergartener who demanded my attention at the exact moment when I was carrying something that could spill – and then it did spill, and they laughed about it for five minutes."

[its-not-that-weird-blog]

"Seriously?!"

Paul Aron x Driver!Reader

Summary: Prema wanted their drivers to have a nice and relaxing weekend before the season starts, but they paired the roomates for the vacation...who's rooming with Paul?!

Warnings: A little bit of angst, fluff, and google translate Italian

The 2023 season is coming up and Prema has a completely new driver lineup for both Formula 2 and Formula 3.

René being René, decided that taking their drivers for a little get away before the season starts was a great idea, so they went to Amalfi Coast, a little chilly but still beautiful during the winter.

Angelina was the one encharged to make the rooming situation, considering who needs more bonding than others, but seeing that Dino decided to take his girlfriend to bond with his friends as well, the decision was made:

Room 1: Ollie and Fred

Room 2: Dino and Elvira

Room 3: Paul and Y/N

Angelina knows that Paul and Y/N have always had a strained relationship, having been rivals since karting, so that was her masterplan, not only that, but she had shipped those two since they first stepped in the Prema factory back when they started single-seaters. 

Going all the way back to 2018, where the real rivalry started, Paul and Y/N were competing in the CIK-FIA championship, throughout the whole season, it was a constant battle between both kids, in the end, Paul ended up winning the championship.

When 2019 rolled around, both kids were surprised to see that Prema had signed a contract with the two of them, even though it was well known that they were rivals, not only on track, but off track too. This took their rivalry to the next level, fighting for the F4 championship, especially the rookie championship…Paul ended up winning, like always.

2020 rolled around, surprisingly, the one that had a seat in Formula Regional was Y/N, not Paul. He sadly didn’t find any seats available for Frec, so he went to formula renault.

This little battle continued. 2021 for FRECA, both were teammates again, though that year, Y/N ended up winning the championship and went to be teammates with Arthur and Ollie in F3 and Paul repeated FRECA alongside Dino. Now in the present, Dino, Paul and Y/N are back being in the same team.

The tension grew so much that Angelina wanted it to end, because they needed a good year for the Formula 3 team. So she put her plan in action. She passed this idea through René first and of course he was beaming with glee. He needed those two to get along.

When everyone got to the hotel, the roommates were announced. Everyone was trying to hold in their giggles when they saw Paul and Y/N’s faces.

“Angelina, this has to be a joke, right?” Y/N said, “I thought you said that , well besides Dino, the ones that shared an academy were going to share!” 

“Yeah! Angelina, it should be me and Fred and Ollie with Y/N” Paul said while aggravatedly running his fingers through his hair.

“Guys, we need you to get along, please!” René pleaded, “I know teammates don’t have to be best friends, but at least be civil with each other” He finishes 

Y/N and Paul sighed and followed everyone to the elevator. They were glaring at each other, Y/N was thinking of ways to be apart throughout the whole trip, she was planning on doing everything with Ollie, who was her best friend, and just go back to the room to sleep. Paul on the other hand was thinking of spending time with both Fred and Dino, mostly with Fred though, because he didn’t want to interrupt the time Dino and his girlfriend would have together.

Funny thing is that underneath all that hatred between Paul and Y/N, everyone knows that they actually have a thing for each other. Except the two idiots in question.

Y/N is a completely hopeless romantic, but never gives love a try because she is terrified that no one will get used to her hectic schedule and just overall, to her hectic life. She started to feel something for Paul when she saw all her friends starting to get into relationships, not because of the FOMO, but because she spent most of her time with him, and even though they would bicker most of the time, Y/N would imagine what it would be like dating Paul.

For Paul, it is a whole different story. He never lacked the attention of girls, he had plenty, but he felt a weird connection with Y/N ever since they met. As a dumb kid, he started to annoy Y/N to get her attention, but it backfired on him when, during karting years, he accidentally took Y/N out of the track, getting p1. After the race, he went up to Y/N to make a lighthearted joke, but for very obvious reasons, Y/N was absolutely mad and upset at Paul, and everything went downhill for their relationship.

Both, being the stubborn teens they are, refused to acknowledge their feeling for eachother, so they decided to cover it up with “hatred”. It was easier that way, but not when they have to spend so much time together. Being teammates sometimes sucked. 

Once they arrived at their respective rooms, Paul and Y/N were stunned when they saw just one bed in the room.

“You’ve got to be kidding me” Both said at the same time. 

“I could always sleep on the floor, Y/N” Paul sighed and looked at Y/N, “Take the bed” He said with a soft tone.

Paul was fed up with the fights between him and Y/N, so he will take the opportunity of fixing his relationship with her. No matter how much it costs, he will fix it.

“We can share” Y/N mumbled, “Choose your side of the bed, I will go out to explore with Ollie for a while” She finished, leaving her luggage close to the closet and left the room.

Paul felt almost defeated. Key word being almost. He was sometimes jealous about Y/N’s friendship with Ollie. He had nothing against that nice british kid, but seeing them hang out almost everyday was upsetting. He knew that those two were close due to them being in the same academy, and being teammates last year.

Y/N on the other hand, couldn’t stand the thought of Paul hating her, so that’s why she mostly hung out with Ollie, Arthur and Dino. But mainly Ollie, they bonded over being to young kids in Formula 3, trying to meet everyone’s expectations. For Y/N, Ollie has been the only person to actually know about her true feelings towards Paul, he always gave her advice about what she could do with Paul, but funny enough, she was terrified. Y/N was more scared to show her true feelings than driving a car at 100 mph. 

The whole team wanted Y/N and Paul to notice that both are just overthinking everything, and just start kind of fresh, for them to be friends or even something more.

••••••••••••••• •••••••••••••••

It was around 7pm, everyone was supposed to meet at the lobby at 8 so they could go and have dinner. 

Paul was trying to ignore the presence of Y/N until he could really know what he wanted to do about their relationship, but it was hard to ignore it when all he could hear was the angelic (at least that’s what he thought) voice of Y/N. She was softly singing Vienna by Billy Joel. Paul knew that Y/N loves that song.

Paul, in small worlds, was delighted. He was delighted by every single little thing about his new teammate. He was in too deep, he knew, and was okay with it. 

Y/N could feel Paul’s eyes staring at her and it was making her feel happy and confused. Was it that she was ugly? Is that why he is staring? She was trying not to overthink it more than she already does. 

When Y/N finished her makeup, she left the bathroom and went to the bed to put on her shoes, and once again, she felt Paul’s gaze in her.

“Hey, are you okay? Do I have something in my face for you to be staring at?” Y/N finally asked with a slight humor in her voice.

“No, not at all. You just look beautiful” Paul said truthfully, looking into Y/N eyes.

“Oh, um, thanks” She said blushing and staring back into Paul’s beautiful eyes, “You don’t look too bad yourself” She finished, focusing on her heels to pretend that it wasn’t a big deal.

Paul smiled at Y/N, even though she couldn’t see it. He was beaming with joy at the thought that they were kind of fixing things, but he still had a long way to go with their funny dynamic. 

“We should start heading down, everyone might be there already” Paul voiced to Y/N. She just nodded and grabbed her bag.

Both made their way to the elevator, Paul behind Y/N like a bodyguard. Once they got to the lobby, they didn’t see anyone on the team, so they just decided to go to the restaurant.

“The reservation is under René’s name, right?” Y/N asked and Paul nodded in agreement.

“Ciao, posso aiutarti?” A nice lady asked (Hello, may I help you)

“Ciao, si” Y/N said in a slight broken italian, “Abbiamo una prenotazione a nome René Rosin” She confidently said (Hi, yes. We have a reservation under the name René Rosin)

“Ok, seguimi per favore” The lady said. Both kids followed her and came to a halt when they saw that the table was for two, “Ecco il tuo tavolo, torna subito con i menu” And she left. (Okay, follow me please. Here is your table, be right back with the menus).

Both kids looked at each other in confusion. They sat down and Y/N texted Angelina.

“Angelina just told me that we have to stay here and talk everything out” Y/N huffed out, “I think everyone wants us to fix our relationship” She softly spoked.

Y/N hesitated before gazing up at Paul. He had a shy smile on and waited for a little before starting to talk.

“You know, I never hated you” Paul said with confidence but at the same time, in a hushed voice, “I’ve always liked you, as a person and as a driver. I always find ways to annoy you so I could get your attention” He said with truth gleaming on his eyes, “I never wanted you to hate me, but in my dumb kid head, I thought that it was the only way you could actually notice me” He stopped for a brief moment, “I really like you, as more than just a person and a driver. I’ve always wanted you by my side, when I had a good or a bad race, the only thing going on in my mind was you” He finished.

Y/N was shocked. She never thought that Paul could be slightly interested in her, never. She always saw the attention he got from other girls and was terrified to compete against them. 

“Y/N? Are you okay?” Paul asked, “I shouldn’t have said any of that, goddammit, I scared you, didn’t I?” He frantically let out.

Y/N looked at him, and saw that his eyes were telling nothing but the truth. She was just speechless because of how happy she felt.

Paul stood up from the table and was about to leave, but Y/N stopped him immediately by his wrist.

“Paul, sit down” He looked puzzled at Y/N, “Please” She said softly. He obliged and eventually sat down with his head hanging low, “I really like you too. More than a person and a driver, my eyes have always been just for you” She quietly stated.

“Seriously?!” Paul asked, raising his head up to see Y/N smiling sweetly at him and nodding.

“Yup, I just followed your game because I literally thought you hated me” She giggled at Paul’s face.

“Well, now you know that I feel everything but hatred for you” Paul laughed and couldn’t resist to press a kiss to Y/N’s lips, “That was just the beginning sweetheart” He goofily smiled at the girl he had heart eyes since he was a pre teen.

“Yeah…I guess we have to thank everyone for setting this up” Y/N pecked Paul on his lips and thought that it was the beginning to a very long story.

••••••••••••••• •••••••••••••••

Thank you all for the support on the last one shot, hope you enjoyed this one just as much <3

[thatonecrookedsmile]

I would say that, considering his history, he's not that wrong, but even I have doubts as to whether that would be right. But at the end of the day, this is just a joke that's been in my head for a while, sooooo…eh.

Oh hey, an attempt at a comic? Made by me? That I didn't give up during the process or lost all motivation? What was my only attempt at this, 2019? Damn, it's been a long time.

I thought about leaving this here without editing or any colors, just the natural ones from the paper and pencil. But something in my head said "HAHAHA, no" so I went back to work. I had to put this idea down on paper this time (literally). If another year passes without me being able to execute this idea, I would lose my mind.

This scenario was inspired by this video by Jehtt, inspired by the original meme by Windii. Credits to both of them.

For a long time I wanted to joke - especially on the anniversary - that I wanted Sammy to only have less than 5 seconds in the next game (or in other words, take his screen time in DR, and shorten it even more). You know, just for the funnies (unless..?) But,thanks to the news released at the beginning of January this year about The Cage, I legally can't do this joke anymore…this year. Don't worry, after that comes out (and finally gives Sam the screen time he wants,hopefully) and we start to crawl into the Bendy 3 production era, I'll make this joke when I can.

Anyway, happy birthday Sammy Lawrence. You may not be my favorite character in this franchise, but there are some things I can actually appreciate about you. Plus, you made me laugh a few moments before (you know what I'm talking about) so there's that.

And happy 7 years to Chapter 2, and by extension, Susie, Norman, Alice, the Searchers, (Johnny????), and Beta Ink Bendy. (I would mention Jack too, but he was only introduced with the release of CH4, so technically it's not his birthday yet, but I'll consider him here).

And now? May I be able to do something for CH4's anniversary. Wish me luck,cus I'll need it.

(it might be really late now, but it's still the 18th where I live, so it's still his birthday, so I still won)

[bellewintersroe]

Fernando Alonso x ex! OC smut.

Fernando and Lila have been separated for a year. After a breakup neither of the pair wanted, emotions boil over during a brief meeting in her new home country of Australia. Unlucky for the pair, famous actress and model, Lila only has one night to spend with Alonso, the two make the most of the time they have together. Set in 2019, may not be accurate but it’s just my depiction.

warnings: smut, descriptions of sex, oral, if you’re uncomfortable don’t read. Both characters are heartbroken- some mentions of previous child loss, really want to write a series based off this, comment if it’s something you guys would like to read? This is LONG btw just a warning.

Alonso’s eyes were fixated, his breath didn’t move for a solid 10 seconds when he saw a familiar figure walking in the room. It wasn’t a coincidence that his tie suddenly felt too tight like it was choking him, and she was here. Lila Lillian, the name and face of an angel, his ex-fiancée. The woman who still had his heart a year later. Fernando felt his jaw then fall slack, eyebrows pulling together slightly as his heart began thumping furiously against his chest. There came that funny feeling that he only felt when thinking about her. A longing, a desperation, sadness, shortly followed by a contrasting excitement and happiness to see her here.

Fernando didn’t know why he was shocked. He purposefully came to watch this Grand Prix in Australia knowing she’d possibly be around. The reason their almost-three-year relationship had ended was because of this scheduled move to Australia. They’d experienced so much together before the move, the loss of their unborn baby, an engagement, a bond neither of them shared with any other individual. Fernando swallowed, finally taking a deep breath. Lila had not seen him yet, but Daniel Ricciardo, her close friend who introduced Fernando to her.

His eyes were still focused on her, breathing a little laboured as he moved his head forwards to follow her when she got lost behind a few, taller figures. The petite woman had a radiance like no other, smile bright and wide, encapsulated by her glossy, plump lips. Fernando felt he was in a trance, a dream. He’d been picturing their reunion for days, weeks, even months. When the two figures continuing contact was too difficult, they hadn’t spoke in over three months.

Lila’s gaze was focused on Daniel, laughing at the joke he’d just made, she was aware her ex fiancé may or may not have been at that particular table, but part of her was too afraid to check.

“Fernando is here.” Daniel muttered quietly when they shared a quick hug. “Okay.” Her breath felt sharp, chest pinching. Unknown to either of them, they were experiencing the exact same level of nerves and anticipation as the other.

Fernando only snapped his eyes away when Sebastian slapped him on the back. A supportive kind of action. “You should go say hi before we all get in there.” There wasn’t many of the drivers at the bar, a couple who’d come along with their partners. Fernando wasn’t racing that season, desperate for a change from his not so successful McLaren days. The men there had labelled Lila as his distraction, the reason why he wasn’t performing to the best of his ability, forgetting all about the weakness of their own car. That was something that still made Fernando angry, even a year later.

“Ok.” The Spaniard seemed to move in slow motion. He stared at the table for a moment, earning a few strange looks, swigging his expensive liquor dramatically. It wasn’t how Fernando had pictured, he thought it would be more private, just the two of them. But all the excitement and bustle of the club somehow made their reunion less awkward, less scary. As he approached around the back of the chairs, he was cut short when Lewis’ chair scraped back, accidentally cutting him off to say hello first.

Suddenly Fernando felt transported back to their competitive days, when their respect for one another was yet to greatly form. Fernando thought Lila hadn’t looked at him once, and he felt borderline like he was dying to just speak to her before everybody else got in the way.

“Lewis, hi!” The English girl giggled, arms wrapping around an old friend as the two shared a friendly hug. “Hello you. It’s been ages, how are you? How’s Australia?!”

Fernando borderline felt like he was going into a sulk, tormented by what felt like the longest conversation in the whole of Australia. Finally Lewis sat back down and all of a sudden she was just there. Lila had more of a shock, she hadn’t turned her head to see where Fernando was sat, so now he was stood in front of her, she felt like she was staring at a ghost.

“Fernando.” Her voice was light and airy, heart jumped heavily causing her fingers to touch at the bare skin of her chest. A smile broke on his face and he moved closer, engaging in what both of them wanted to be a tighter hug. Lila inhaled the oh-so familiar scent that sent a wave of nostalgia through her, a comfort like no other. Fernando didn’t fail to recognise the gentle swipe of her thumb over his clothed back, her touch grazing over his waist when they broke apart, something that Fernando shuddered at.

“Hello.” He gently spoke, her brows furrowing a little, the bitter sweet recognition of his voice being borderline overwhelming. His hand still rested on the small of her clothed back, the tiny gesture being enough to make her stomach knot.

I miss you. Fernando thought, “hi.” She giggled nervously, scanning over his face. “How are you?” She spoke after a second or so. Fernando released the tightness of his jaw swiftly. Lila unconsciously held the finger of one hand in her other, her ring finger, now bare without the ring she once wore.

“I’m ok. How are you? You look beautiful.” Fernando’s genuine compliment touched her heart more so than anybody else’s. He saw the way her lips stretched out, the way her eyes still carried a saddened glaze. Angelic, Fernando couldn’t believe how beautiful she looked, the bounce of her hair, the softness of her features. The freckles that dotted over her face- every single detail he once traced he was viewing all over again.

“Thank you…” Lila was so nervous her voice had cracked and faded, so much so Fernando wouldn’t have heard her previous words unless he was watching her so attentively. “So do-”

“Hello, mrs Lillian, I missed you!!!” A little too drunken Sebastian had stumbled over, causing both their heads to turn. Fernando felt a little startled, hand pressing a little firmer against her back. “-you.” She barely finished, clawing at Fernando’s heart as she began grinning again, moving from his hands to Sebastian’s bare hug.

“Take my seat.” Sebastian mouthed to Fernando, winking with a smirk. It was probably Hannahs plan, Sebastian’s wife, to allow the estranged couple to sit next to one another. A drunken ploy to bring the two of them together. Fernando cleared his throat, shuffling back to Sebastian’s seat.

Lila had made her way around the table, being ushered into a seat, not too subtly, next to Fernando. His blazer still rested on the back of the seat, warm against her back which he’d worn previously. The fancy award show which took place prior wasn’t necessarily something Fernando liked, Lila too, but she always did like seeing him a suit…

“Are you staying for a few?” Daniel questioned from across the table, she leaned forwards, smile stretching. “I shouldn’t, all my friends have left, I only really came to say hi. My flights at like 9 tomorrow.”

She was met with a range of objections, pleads and exclamations. From everybody apart from Fernando who felt like he’d been punched in the gut. She was flying out? Away from where he would be for the next week? How was this fair, it couldn’t have been.

“Okay, I’ll stay. Only for a couple though, Daniel I know you’re gonna try get me drunk!” She warned, speaking confidently, laughing at her own comment as Fernando’s lips twitched. She always was funny, a little quirky but her sense of humour was something he found so attractive. “Gonna make me miss my flight.” She commented, laughing gently as Fernando’s eyebrows perked realising she was speaking to him. She’d stolen a glance, desperate to not make their interaction awkward.

“Where are you flying to?” His accent was thicker than she remembered, he leant back in his chair, looking as cool as ever. She smiled gently, fingers still playing with one another.

“New York. I’ve got a shoot there.” Lila laughed a little at how prestigious the words sounded. “Ah.” Fernando nodded, feeling a little loss for words. His disappointment was maybe a little too evident, so he was quick to down the rest of his drink. “Would you like a drink?”

“Oh, yeah..” so much for ‘I wasn’t drinking’ Lila felt the nerves rattling through her bones, something that could only be softened by the flow of alcohol. “I’ll come.”

“No, no, it’s fine. I have it.” He nodded, standing up before she could. Her head tilted up, “oh, Fernando you don’t have to.”

“It’s okay.” He firmed. “Rose?”

“Yeah.” Lila inhaled. “Please…” The more conversation flowed, the more alcohol was consumed. Lila felt consumed by the back Fernando was right there, and as the clock was striking 12, she knew she should’ve been leaving, but the urgency to just do something, do more, with him was overwhelming.

She was two-and-a-half glasses in and being a lightweight, the buzz of the alcohol was already clouding her mind. When she’d taken a break from the conversation Lila felt herself lean back into her chair, instinctively tilting her head towards her left to where Fernando was. His veiny hands were spread over his thighs, finger cladded by the ring she bought him.

When he’d noticed where she was looking, Fernando tensed up a little, lifting his hand to look at the ring himself. “It’s a nice ring.” He shrugged, smirking to himself.

“I know.” She shrugged, border line teasing him. “I picked it out.” Lila chuckled down to her wine, sipping more of the drink she was enjoying a little too much.

“Oh, I didn’t know that.” He fired back playfully. Lila fully looked to him now, smiling properly. “You didn’t remind me once a week.” Fernando felt his heart flutter when she giggled at his words.

“I was proud!” She defended. “And I have good taste.” Lila shrugged, sipping on her drink. Fernando smirked towards her, eyes falling to the slit in her long, black dress. “I know.” He responded, quickly turning up to where she was already looking back to him. Throughout their conversation with one another and the others, the two were moving closer and closer together.

“There’s so many spiders here though, I knew there would be- but I was shocked they’re literal tarantulas.” She dramatically exclaimed. “I was right the whole time. Moving to Australia was a bad idea.” He was joking, of course, but there was an element of truth that lingered. When the two would occasionally dispute when being together, it was about her move to Australia.

“Yeah, yeah, course you were.” She playfully knocked his arm which he rested on the back of his chair. Their chairs were almost touching, every now and then their feet would touch under the table, her heel grazing against his shin. Fernando had no idea if it was intentional or not, but there was something ignited deep inside him at the fact they were reunited again.

“I mean, I should’ve listened to you about the snakes.” She turned her body to face his, knees touching his thigh. Fernando instinctively spread his legs a little further so they pressed firmer against her legs.

“Oh yeah?” He laughed, eyeing her up quickly, arm resting over the back of the chair she sat on subtly. “Yeah, they’re terrifying.” She admitted.

“Are they big?”

“Huge, Nando, you’d be terrified.”

“I don’t like the sound of that.” “Yeah? Good job you didn’t come to Australia with me then.” Although he could hear the sarcasm and joking oozing off her tone, his smile faltered, scanning over Lila’s expression. Her smile fell harder than when it had started. It was something she never could understand- well she could, but she always hoped Fernando would come to Australia with her at some point.

“Im only kidding.” She pointed out, aware the joke didn’t fall as it had intended to. His arm had fallen off the back of his chair. He offered her a gentle smile, a reassuring one. “You know-” as she finished her third glass of wine, she felt her filter becoming non existent.

“It is nice to see you, I wondered if… if you’d be here, you know cos you’re not racing and all this season?” Fernando’s heart melted as he automatically reached out, placing a hand on her thigh, not too far up. He could see the blush that grew on her face, the physical hitch in her throat.

“I missed you-” she dropped casually, touching his warm hand lightly, before removing it seconds later. “Sorry…” Lila frowned, wondering if she’d gone a little too far. The words simply stabbed at Fernando’s heart further. His fingers squeezed over her bare flesh. “I miss you.” He was quick to reply, voice low and head dipped slightly. The two of them looked at one another through their eyelashes.

“How are you doing? You know, taking some time off?” Terrible, heartbroken. Fernando wanted to be open with her.

“Keeping busy.”

“Not burning yourself out, I hope?” A kind hand laid on his arm supportively. “No.” He responded. “Just… I just needed some time off after last season.” And after the break up.

“McLaren.” She awkward smiled, exhaling the word out. She knew the things they thought of her, a distraction, a pretty girl that at 22 knew nothing when she was dating a man 12 years her senior. They probably rejoiced and laughed when they split. For Fernando that wasn’t home, he couldn’t accept anybody in his life who didn’t accept her, still, to this day. She was his home, and now she’d gone he felt clueless.

“Yeah…” he knowingly spoke. A moment of silence took over the pair. She glanced down to the time, 12:45. “Oh god. I need to go to bed.” Lila felt Fernando’s hand slip a little further up her leg when he looked to also check the time. “Do you have to leave, already?” His words tugged at her heart, a contrast to the way her core was burning at his hand flattened over her bare thigh.

“I’m flying out tomorrow, I have at be at the airport by 6:30.” She sighed, chest heavy with sadness. She’d been so caught up with catching up with Fernando she had somewhat forgotten that the night would have to come to an end.

“One more drink won’t kill you.” He attempted to lighten the mood by nudging her shoulder. In return Lila could only offer him a saddened smile. “Sorry, Nando…” the nickname made his chest ache painfully. “Then I will walk you back.” He offered as she reached over to catch his fingers against her own. Fernando hated that he didn’t feel the cold of her ring on against his hand. It should’ve been there… “Okay.” Her voice was reduced to a whisper as he helped her up, “we are heading off.” Fernando cleared his throat to the few people still gathered around the table. People eyed up the pair, some smirking, some shocked.

“It’s been nice to see you all, hopefully I’ll see you guys soon… bye Danny.. see you Seb.” After a few moments of goodbye’s the two left side-by-side. For Lila it felt just like old times, except there was a sadness that lingered.

“I’m getting a ride back.” Lila had already texted her driver, who was waiting outside. She halted, looking up to Fernando whom she had paused so they were face to face. Her words made his heart drop, feelings reminiscent of that early morning in the airport when they said goodbye for good.

“I just wanted to say bye to you away from the table.” Lila slowly explained, seeing Fernando scanning over her face with sadenned, puppy eyes. “Don’t look at me like that, Nando.” She felt as though she could cry, reaching out and taking his hand.

Fernando swallowed, stealing a glimpse out to the car readily parked outside. When he turned back to her he felt like he’d been punched in the gut to see her eyes becoming glassy.

“No, no, no.” He hushed, pulling her closer. Her arms wrapped over his shoulders, feeling his hand on her waist, the other on the back of her head. “Come with me, Nando…” she’d pulled back only slightly, gazing up to the taller man. Tears had yet to spill, she was just awaiting his response.

“Pl-” “Yes.” Fernando simply spoke, placing her hand back into his. “Let’s go, bebé.”

The car ride home was comfortable, neither of them spoke too much, but Fernando had purposefully sat next to her in the middle seat, their hands still intertwined. Both of them felt the need for one another, the deep desire that burnt in each of their hearts. It went beyond lust, it was a need. Lila would brush her hand against Fernando’s inner thigh every now and then and he would struggle with the urge to control his mind leading elsewhere.

“Where are you staying?” Lila gently asked when they were stood outside her hotel room. Living in Sydney, she was pretty far from home. “Not too far from here. I will walk.” Fernando nodded. “W- no. You can- you can get a taxi.” She stammered, purposefully delaying the goodbye. What she really wanted to say was ‘you can stay’ but somehow, despite the Dutch courage, she was nervous.

Fernando smiled tightly, running a hand down her arm before glancing back down the hall, where the lifts were. Lila’s heart jumped in a desperation that screamed at her to not let him leave.

“Fernando-”

“Lila-” he began, taking hold of her hand. “Yeah?” She felt lost for breath, as did Fernando. He picked up her hand, pulling it up to his lips intimately. She let out a closed mouth sigh, one that was audible to his ears, hurting his heart.

“Come here.” He whispered, pulling her right into his front where they shared a tight embrace. “I miss you, Nando. I meant to say it earlier, not that I missed you. I still do.” The clarification was something Fernando honestly had not picked up on, but it was still enough to make him feel like he wanted to cry.

“I know.” He whispered feeling her pull back to gaze over his face. The two shared no more words, just a look that they both recognised. With a gentle caress of her cheek, Fernando moved forwards, pressing his lips to hers gently. That kiss sealed their fate. It gave them both butterflies just like it was the first time, and when the kiss deepened she found herself pulling him into her room, key card clumsily waving against the door to unlock it.

When they were inside she grappled hold of his blazer desperately, beginning to push it off as he simultaneously began pulling off his tie. Their tongues danced against one another’s, lipstick smearing over his lips as they frantically made out with one another.

When they fell back into the bathroom door the two of them shared a giggle, meeting eyes for the first time. Lila’s smile remained as her fingers fell to the buckle on his belt. Fernando glanced down with a slack jaw before moving in for another kiss, breathing becoming heavier as she began unbuckling his belt, unzipping his trousers and leaving them open. Her hand was going to reach down into his underwear but she had to steady herself, holding onto his shoulders. Fernando closed the gap between them, hard cock pressing against her inner hip as she moaned against his lips.

His hands travelled down, pulling her dress down with it, tits exposing as he began leaving open mouthed kisses over her skin, her sensitive nipples. He was holding her up by the waist, crotch pressed into his by a hand on her ass. If he wasn’t holding onto her, Lila swore she’d fall over from the dizzy feeling. Fernando knew her body better than anybody, she had never been with anybody better, now she was desperate to have him again, all of him.

“Nando.” When she moaned, he swore he was being visited by the angels. He’d fully pushed her dress down and off, leaving her in a black pair of thongs and her heels. “Fernando, please, I can’t wait.” She choked out at the swipe of his hand over her aching pussy. She was throbbing for him, Fernando was positive he could feel it. He felt his cock painfully hard in his boxers, so much so it hurt.

When he felt the grab of her hand on him he thought he’d cum there and then. Something snapped and he was leading her towards the bed, nudging her down and pulling his cock free. He licked his hand, pushing her thongs to the side and swiping the wetness across her already dripping pussy. He groaned in pleasure at the sensation. The familiarity drove Fernando crazy, her chest was heaving and falling as they made eye contact, it was all so full of anticipation.

Usually Nando would go down on her for what felt like hours before, he’d made her finish endless amounts of times and he found nothing more erotic than seeing her in that position, writhing, pulling his hair, grinding her hips against his mouth. Lola’s lower stomach was burning, her hands holding around Fernando’s muscular arms, the tip of his unprotected cock nudging against her pussy.

More preparation was ideal, but neither of them could wait, he was gentle with his movement, watching her attentively for any sign of pain. Fernando reached out, stroking her cheek before falling on top of her, hands at either side of her as he eased his length into her.

Lola’s breath hitched, feeling him pull a pillow under her neck for comfort, his Adam’s apple bobbing as he took a deep breath, cock buried deep inside of her. “Nando.” She breathed, hand stroking down the back of his scalp and neck.

“Is that ok?” He quickly spoke as soon as he heard the delicate whisper of his name. “Yeah, you feel so good.” Lila swallowed, he sunk down, lips pressing to her forehead as he began moving slowly.

Fernando always enjoyed missionary with Lila, especially now, he could see every inch of her pleasure, kiss her, squeeze here, anything she wanted. Her heels still remained on her feet, spread wide. Fernando couldn’t resist running a hand up the inside of her soft flesh. He exhaled, his temple pressed to hers as he began moving slowly, sensually. His hips rolled slowly, her own bouncing up slightly to meet his as they engaged in a deep, messy kiss.

“I missed you… so much.” Fernando shakily sighed, “I missed you.” With every touch, every stroke, Fernando felt himself becoming unravelled in her hold, everything felt so intimate, their eye contact, their kisses, they were making love like it was the last time. Maybe it was, Fernando shook the thought from his mind. The slide of his cock in and out of her perfect pussy drove him into a trance, pulling her up onto his lap.

His movements were strong, she found it so erotic that as soon as she sat in his lap she began rocking her hips back and fourth against his. Their pants and gasps filled the room, foreheads pressed to one another as Fernando began to sweat in his shirt. His pants had been discarded but he couldn’t find the chance to possibly stop what was going on to undress fully.

When her movements became a little faster, her head dropped back, a louder moan escaping her lips, one that drove Alonso crazy. He was staring at her, watching her intensely as she rode him, fingers digging deeper into the flesh of his shoulders. He wanted her to leave marks for days to come so even if they weren’t near, he’d still have something technically of hers.

“Fernando, fuck… fuck.” Her moans developed into whines, his hips beginning to snap into hers. With more confidence, he felt his gasps slowly turn into grunts that escaped through his teeth. He pulled her back into his body, hugging her through the love making as she bounced up and down on his aching member.

“Please…” she babbled, a little unknown as to what she was pleading for. More of him, all of him, him to come back. “Shit.” Fernando cursed, eyes squeezing shut when she rolled herself deep against his cock. He wasn’t sure how long he’d last, she was already working towards an orgasm. Only Fernando could make her feel so good.

“Tan bueno. Eres tan buena.” He muttered out, an open mouthed groan escaping his lips. She responded to his words with an open mouthed cry, back arching and falling back again. “Please, Nando, please, fuck me.” She was being wicked, so very cruel, tits bouncing as she threw her head back, hair also bouncing with each movement.

Fernando was breathing out loud now, taking a handful of her breast, squeezing at the nipple as he watched her like he was seeing stars. Lila felt herself going into overdrive, there was something so erotic and intimate about being back with the man she still loved so much. When his hand travelled down to her clit, rubbing in the perfect way she liked, she knew she was a sucker.

“Fuck, I’m- Fernando, I’m gonna cum.” She slurred, choking out moans between each word. Her stomach was building as her movements turned frantic, he sped up to hit her g-spot, the bed squeaking under his movements. Lila felt bad for the people downstairs…

Her orgasm crept up painfully fast, she was gasping out loud, eyebrows scrunched as she stared back to his glistening eyes. “Cum for me, fuck. You can do it.” He encouraged, his fingers digging deeper into her hip bone. Lila’s voice cracked as she hit her peak, momentarily losing the ability to think as she experienced the most overwhelming orgasm ever.

The best part of it? She fell back into Fernando’s arms after, chest heaving and falling as she panted, coming down from her pure bliss. “Tan buena.” He told her, fingers stroking up her back.

“Mmmmh.” She hummed, brows still furrowed, lips pouted as they shared another kiss. Nando was gentle and careful to start his movements again, knowing she’d be sensitive from her prior orgasm.

“You feel so tight, oh my-” Fernando’s eyes rolled back as he bit down on her shoulder, hips slowly fucking into her. It wasn’t enough, he needed her faster, harder, all of her. He wanted to fill her with his seed, make her his again. “-God.” He finished his sentence, shuddering as he lifted her slightly, nudging her to go on all fours.

Lila loved when Fernando wanted to go in doggy. He was always so passionate, so good, most of all he fucked her like no other man could, so with a kiss to her pussy, and another to her bum cheek, he slid back in, groaning and grunting at the sensation.

“Lila.” He moaned, head dropping back in reaction to her back arching. She whined against the mattress, clawing at the sheets as she fell back onto his cock. His hands steadied her, overwhelmed with how beautiful this angle was. His thumbs pressed into the dimples at the bottom of her back, massaging slightly.

“Please, Fernando… fuck me how you used to.” Her words somehow got him almost choked up, but riled up to say the least. With the snatch of a hip each, he fucked into her, using all his stamina to continue the sex until they were both experiencing an immeasurable amount of pleasure. “Mierda. Ángel mío, te sientes tan jodidamente bien.” Fernando’s dirty words weren't something she could properly translate, but she loved it, with each fuck of his cock inside of her he was growing hungrier, more desperate. “Please!” She wept, feeling her stomach constantly tighten from the pleasure.

“Please, Nando.” Lila let out a pornographic moan, one that Fernando followed with, the sound of her moans and begs becoming filthy driving him too close to the edge. His hips moved harshly, body curling over hers as his groans began long before his orgasm even began.

With one last whimper, of her asking him to finish inside her, Fernando felt he was driven crazy. His head was spinning as he felt the shoot of his seed filling her up, pussy clenched around him as he let out the hottest sound she’d ever heard. His body slumped, quickly resting a hand on the bed to support him through his orgasm, cheek rested on her back.

Fernando was in love, so deeply in love, still. “I love you.” He shuddered out as Lila felt the jump of her heart, her eyes pricking at the words. “I love you.” Her voice caught in her throat, but she didn’t hesitate to say it back. Fernando let out one final moan, milking the last of his orgasm before pulling out and smoothing down her back when she laid on her front.

He shifted to the right of her, laying on his side to meet her half way for gentle kisses. “Stay tonight.” Her hand rested against his forearm which still trembled from the pleasure he’d just experienced.

“Okay.” Fernando kissed her deeply once again. Apart from excusing herself to the bathroom for a few moments, the two were inseparable, naked bodies intertwine throughout the night. Neither of them wanted to sleep, they both had so much to say, yet so little time. Fernando worried if he’d closed his eyes then morning would arouse him and they’re separation would follow.

Of course, morning did come. The bustle of her attempting to prepare for the airport was only something Nando could soothe her with. Except this time, she thought she’d burst into tears at any moment knowing they’d have to say goodbye. He rode with her to the airport, carried her bags. Their connection from the night before had drew then irreversibly close once again.

As soon as the airport came into Lila’s vision, her stomach dropped. “We’re here.” She whispered, fingers sliding over Fernando’s thigh. He was still in the same clothes from last night, not that he really cared, he just wanted to be there with her. Something washed over Fernando, he borderline snatched her hand, preventing her from pulling it back.

“Come home with me.” “Fernando-” she sighed, hearing this conversation many times over. “Please. We can start another life together, put your ring back on.” She could feel the sickly feeling arise in her chest when their car pulled up.

“Nando.” Her heart became heavy and the tears in her eyes only grew further at his words. He kissed her, deeply, quickly. “I miss you.” That broke the flood gates. Her eyes began streaming as he held her tightly. The only person that could reduce him to tears was her.

“I miss you so much.” She repeated. “But I can’t, not after we lost- I just… for now. I can’t.” She almost spiralled, but a deep inhale and reminder that the driver was waiting outside the car with her bags pulled her back together. Fernando’s jaw was clenched to prevent him becoming choked up. “I’m sorry.” He stared blankly at the space between them, he’d become overwhelmed with a desperation for him back in her life. One that killed him. He began to worry they’d never be together again.

“Te esperaré...” “I will wait for you too, Nando…”

[chaotic-goodsir]

Thinking about Spankoffski-Cross family headcanons again, the implications of Wilbur being 10 years younger than Annie and only 9 years older than Ted, and the story behind the 'Uncle Wiley' character...

(It's gonna be sad I'm sorry)

*

In 1992, 17-year-old Wilbur Cross graduates high school early with a place on a college physics course. It doesn't start until September, but he seizes the opportunity to escape his parents as soon as possible.

That summer, Wilbur moves in with his sister Annie and her family in Hatchetfield, and agrees to help out by babysitting his 8-year-old nephew Teddy. He even brings a bunch of his old superhero comics in the hope of winning the kid's approval.

Teddy knows he has an uncle - his mom sometimes mentions her brother (she always calls him Wiley), but he's never met or spoken to him before. His grandparents down in Georgia, who he's also never met, made sure of that. He's always assumed his uncle must be a grown-up like his parents, so he's surprised when 'Uncle Wiley' turns out to be a teenager.

Naturally, the first thing Teddy asks Wilbur when he meets him is: 'Why aren't you old?'

Wilbur is slightly terrified by the prospect of looking after an 8-year-old. But after a few months helping Teddy learn how to ride a bike and listening to his nephew ramble about random kid nonsense (he ends up learning a lot about Transformers that summer) he decides it isn't so bad.

Getting to spend time with his sister and her husband isn't too bad either. Annie teaches him how to make chilli so he won't starve at college, and Ed tries to convince him to cut his hair (he doesn't).

As the summer goes on, the 'why aren't you old?' thing turns into an in-joke between Wilbur and Teddy - each adding more to the Uncle Wiley character until he becomes a pipe-smoking sailor with a beard and a silly voice (since Teddy loves doing impressions so much). Before Wilbur leaves, Teddy draws him a picture of Uncle Wiley. It's far from a work of art, but it ends up on the wall in Wilbur's room at college - much to the amusement of his roommate.

*

Thirteen years later, Ted Spankoffski is halfway through his own college course, depressed and disillusioned after losing Jenny to Andy Kilgore. He's hungover (or maybe still half-drunk) on a Saturday morning when his mom calls, almost in tears, to tell him his uncle has been declared missing in action.

That sobers him up pretty quickly.

The last time he saw his uncle alive was at Pete's christening. Wilbur asked how his first year of college was going, and seemed genuinely interested, though he was surprised Teddy chose to study IT and not theatre. They joked about the old sailor character and the impressions Teddy used to do.

(Ted never learned exactly what Wilbur did for a living, something to do with science and the military, but he was always vague about the details.)

The drawing - paper now yellowed and crumpled at the edges - returns to the Spankoffskis (along with a box of old science fiction novels and a few other things of Wilbur's that John felt ought to be sent back to his family). Ted keeps it. Sometimes, when he's not sure how to be a good big brother to Pete, he takes it out and thinks about that summer in 1992, and the teenage uncle who helped him finally learn how to ride a bike.

*

In 2019, the homeless man who currently sleeps outside Hatchetfield Mall starts to notice posters going up for some new children's toy. At first it's not the toy that interests him, but the mascot character holding it - and the toy company's name.

It's strange. He's sure he had an Uncle Wiley once - his uncle might even have been a sailor, like the one on the posters, with a pipe and a beard and a funny voice...

The homeless man decides he's going to buy one of the Wiggly dolls. It will make Petey happy. It will prove he's a good big brother, despite the mess his life and mind have become. And if it really is his Uncle Wiley selling the toys, then he should support a family business, shouldn't he? His dad always used to say the Spankoffskis were entrepreneurs.

He might even get a discount. That would be nice.

With a determined smile, the homeless man counts up all the money he has to his name, tucks it into his pocket, and joins the queue outside Toyzone on Black Friday.

[leclerqueensainz]

A Family of Three (C.L 16)

Part. III - Heroes, Princess and Fewawi.

⚠️ Warnings: Distress (Charles is very sad talking about losing someone he loves), mention of maternal abandonment, issues with parents, and postpartum depression, among other triggers. However, there is also a cute interaction with Vincenzo for the first time, so that's a step forward.

Enjoy the reading!

P.S.: This is entirely based on Charles's point of view.

Word Count: 4,332.

🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨

April 19, 2019 - Monte Carlo, Monaco.

When my father died a few years ago, I thought I would be prepared for any loss I would have endure later on. I anticipated losing other people, of which I had no doubt, but I swore that nothing could shake me as much as losing my hero.

When I lied to him about securing the Ferrari contract because it was his dream, and I wanted him to rest in peace, knowing that we had achieved it, that all the effort he had put into my future had been worthwhile, I thought nothing else could hurt as much as knowing he would never have the opportunity to see me don a red racing suit and drive a Scuderia car.

When I was given permission to drive the car carrying his casket, and I drove through the city so my father could bid a final farewell to the place he lived and loved for so long before taking him to the cemetery, I thought nothing could destroy my heart and burn every cell of my body as much as that did.

I was wrong.

But I should have known better. I should have understood that no pain would be enough to call someone's soul.

The news reached me two days ago on Monday when I was still in Shanghai after a race. Marie, my ex-girlfriend, called me in the middle of the night, and I couldn't fathom why she was calling me when we hadn't spoken in six months since the breakup.

My heart had raced before answering the phone, and a thousand thoughts crossed my mind—whether she was drunk and missing me or if she dialed accidentally. If she just wanted to talk because she had a bad day and Jules didn't answer when she called. I could expect anything and think of any possibility, but never these words. "Jules is dead." That's what she said right after my hello. There were no tears, no pauses. Just a broken and lifeless voice. A dead and cold voice.

Marie hadn't called because she was drunk or had a bad day and had no one else to talk to. It wasn't nostalgia for the six months we had been apart. It wasn't to tell me she loved me, as I had dreamed so many times before.

Marie called because our best friend, my godfather, was dead. No tears, no pauses. Just shock. It was direct. It was terrifying.

I wanted to know what she was talking about because Jules had left after the race, and he was fine. He was happy with the position and wanted to return to Nice to celebrate with the family. She didn't answer me. And I wondered if she had a baby or if it was a playful way to start a conversation with an ex-boyfriend. But she didn't laugh like I knew she would if she were joking. Then I felt it. The silence that told the truth. I had lost Jules, too.

So I shouted into the phone, said it wasn't funny, I was late, and I didn't want to participate in that cruel game. Denial. "Come to Monaco, Charles." She said and hung up.

I never wanted to have answered. I never wanted to pack hastily, wake up Pierre, and tell him we had lost him. I didn't want to arrive in Monaco and see the faces of my brothers and my mother painted with grief again. "I'm so sorry, my love." That's what my mother said when I fell to my knees and allowed myself to cry in front of my family as she hugged me. "It will be okay." That's what Lorenzo said. But we both knew it wouldn't.

I thought I wouldn't feel the sense of helplessness and bitterness when putting on a black suit again. I thought grief would be something I could handle. But it wasn't.

I begged anything that existed not to take anything else from me. I couldn't bear to make the same journey to that church because of another funeral. And I didn't want the experience of that shadow that left me shattered again.

I didn't want to overcome another loss; I didn't want to wonder why the pain didn't pass and didn't seem enough. I didn't want to try to understand or hear people saying that he would be in a better place and everything was God's purpose.

God. Why did he seem so angry with me? Wasn't losing my father enough? Why did he need Jules, too?

knowing that the only certainty of life is death, why didn't God bring an easier way for those who remain to overcome it?

There was no more my father; there was no more Jules. My heroes were gone, and I was left here. Why was I left?

I was being selfish and wise. Nevertheless, it was what allowed me to feel at the moment. I was alone, without those who once helped me become who I am. There was no one else to advise or guide me. And even though I still had Lorenzo or Arthur, I felt lost, like a drifting boat.

When the car parked in front of that church, I asked my family to proceed. I need a few minutes. I gathered the courage and strength to enter that place once again and face what I already knew would be the cause of my nightmares in the coming days. "Confront your demons," everyone says. But whoever coined that phrase never understood the complexity of the dark and bitterness-filled hole that grief brings.

I stared at the church from behind the car window. The same car in which I had once smiled with my best friend for having won it and carrying the Ferrari brand on its bodywork. The same car where I cried when I thought about how my father would have reacted to seeing me come home with it, and Jules hugged me and said it didn't matter where he would be; he would be selling and proud of my achievements.

And now I'm here inside. I'm inside this car, once again, in front of this church. However, without the consolation of someone I love this time. I'm inside this machine, summoning the courage to enter the funeral of someone who once comforted me for a loss.

I'm here summoning the courage to say goodbye to another of my heroes.

🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷🇫🇷

January 20, 2023 - Nice, France.

I park the car in front of an old, low-rise building. Beside me, Marie watches closely as Cecilia steps out of the car in front of us. I can feel her nervousness and notice her hands tightly gripping the cuffs.

I know exactly what she's feeling, and a part of me is proud that I still manage to understand her body language even after all these years, but I try my best to downplay it since it's a delicate moment for both her and me.

After the meeting, Cecilia made a request that we expected but still caught us somewhat off guard. She wanted us to meet Vincenzo that afternoon. And that's where we are now—parked in front of the building, which I assume is where Cecilia lives with Vincenzo.

"What if he doesn't like us?" Marie asks softly. And I think she's posing the question more to herself than me.

"Hey! He's going to adore us!" I say, and she looks at me. Her eyes are wide with fear and anxiety. "Marie, it won't be easy initially, but we've discussed this before. Let's take it one step at a time. Don't think of Vincenzo as our future responsibility for now; think of him as a piece of Jules we will meet, okay?" Her eyes fill with tears, but she nods and smiles.

I take her hand, still clenched into a fist, and slowly bring it to my lips, gently touching it. Her hand opened, and I saw the half-moon red marks in her palm. She sighs in surprise, and I smile, trying to convey reassurance, even though I'm as terrified as she is deep down.

"We'll make it, my dear. Trust me," I say, and she agrees.

She subtly motions for me to release her wrist, but before I can feel my stomach sink with her rejection, her hand grabs mine and squeezes—a firm grip with a lot of meaning. My eyes go from our joined hands to her face, and this time, she has a small, reassuring smile on her lips.

"Let's go, Leclerc! Let's meet the legacy of our best friend."

(…)

"Sorry for the number of stairs! Our elevator hardly ever works," Cecilia says when we finally reach her apartment door after climbing about eight flights of stairs.

I lean against the wall next to the door and pull the air firmly into my lungs. On the other hand, in the last step, Marie depends on the railing, trying to laugh her heart out and normalize her breathing.

"Jesus! How do you manage to do this every day?" She asks Cecilia, who laughs and shrugs.

"Try doing it with a child in your arms; you'll guarantee it's much worse," she says, and Marie laughs lightly.

"So, good for you that you'll soon be free from going through this, right?" I speak, and the smile once painted on her lips fades.

Marie clears her throat, making me take my eyes off Cecilia and look at her. She is giving me a reproachful look, and I muster all of myself not to roll my eyes.

"Cecilia, do you want to go in first and talk to Vincenzo for a bit?" She asks, and Cecilia agrees.

"Good idea! Be back in a minute," she says, searching for the key inside her bag until she finds it and inserts it into the door lock. Before she turned the doorknob to open it, she waited for me for a full minute.

"I'm not asking you to like me, Charles," her tone is profound, and I stare at her with the same intensity. "But know that while we are in my house and front of Vincenzo, you won't talk to me like that, and you won't disrespect my pain in front of my son. I know I can't expect much from you because you're a man, and you'll never understand the situation with any view other than a man's." She turns entirely to me. "None of this is a walk in the park. Not for any of us. And this is the saddest thing I've had to do since I spent 12 hours in labor alone in a hospital while still mourning the father of my child." Tears overflow in her eyes, and I swallow hard.

"I messed up, and I messed up a lot. But I pay my penance every day for it. While you could feel the pain of mourning at your doorstep, I had to get up every day to feed and change a child who depended on me, and for a long time, I considered him to blame for everything." She lowers her gaze, shame and regret in her words reflecting her being. "They said it was postpartum depression, but I always knew better. I always loved Vincenzo, but I will never be able to look at him without seeing the reflection of my mistakes." She wipes the tears streaming down her face with the backs of her hands. "I will live eternally with these ghosts haunting me, but I won't let my son go through this." She says and turns, opening the door and entering right after.

The door closes with a soft thud, and I look at her. I don't know how I should react or even what I feel in the face of Cecilia's declaration. But even without knowing, shame points at the pit of my stomach. It's a shame because I wonder what Jules would say if he could see me now. And I think about my father for the first time in a long time.

"She didn't say that for you to feel bad, Charles," I'm drawn by Marie's voice. Her expression is serious, but her tone is gentle. "But she's not entirely wrong. You'll never understand her, not just because you're a man, but because this situation is far beyond any understanding and empathy you and I can have." She says, and her gaze shifts momentarily before returning to me. "I think the only one who could understand her is no longer here." She whispers the last part, and I continue observing her and digesting her words.

I also wonder if Marie has ever felt like Cecilia, not for the same reasons; that's obvious. But for different reasons, has she ever felt so alone with no one to understand her motives?

And then, I remember when I found out she had left a few days after Jules' funeral. I went to her apartment in the center of Monaco, and when I arrived, the landlord told me she had moved two days ago. I remember the emptiness that filled me: the pain, the loneliness, the mourning.

I had questioned many times why she left and abandoned me, even though she had nothing left with me and no obligation to try to restore what was broken inside me. But at no point did I wonder what she felt.

Jules died, and Marie and I no longer had a relationship. Her parents were never real parents. She had no one else but me, and even though I felt lonely and abandoned, I still had family who felt my pain.

So, is that it? Is that why she left? Because she thought she had no one else? Did she go through all of this alone?

"Please, Charles. Don't do this," she says, and I stare at her.

"Do what?" I ask, confused.

"Don't try to decipher if there's more to what I said than what I said," her gaze is as intense as Cecilia's a bit ago. "This is not about me and certainly not about you." And with these words, she ended the subject.

I wish I could retort and ask her, but that wasn't the moment, and I had already messed up enough for today. So, I nod in understanding, and she relaxes her shoulders and clears her throat.

Marie walks towards me in small steps, my trained eyes on her movements. She stops by my side, leaning against the same wall as me. Her face turned to the stairs where she was before.

"I'm sorry," is what I say because that's what I feel. Marie looks at me, and a faint smile adorns her lips.

"It's not your fault," she looks back at the stairs, and I follow.

We spend a few more minutes facing the cold steps, both immersed in our thoughts until I hear a slight maneuver coming from inside Cecilia's apartment. The door opened, but there was no one there.

"Hi!" A childish voice says, and I look down, seeing a tiny being with dimples and chubby cheeks staring at us. "I'm Vitiendo."

I feel my body freeze, and everything around me seems blurry. The little one looks at me with big brown eyes, just like Jules'. My heart races inside my chest, but still, I try to pull the air as deep as I can.

I crouch down, getting as close as I can to Vincenzo's height, and he keeps looking at me with big and curious eyes.

"Are you a friend of Daddy?" He asks, and I nod.

"Your father was my best friend," I say, his eyes light up. "I'm Charles. Nice to meet you, Vincenzo," I add, extending my hand for him to take.

"Will you be my best friend too, Shal?" he asks, looking from my hand back to my face.

I feel my eyes welling up, and a smile grows on my face.

"Yes, Vincenzo. You'll be my best friend," I reply, and he throws himself into my arms. I was startled and remained still momentarily, feeling his little arms tightly wrapped around my neck.

I instinctively hugged him back when I finally realized he was hugging me.

Tears I tried to hold back streamed down my face. It's Jules' son who is in my arms now. And it's him to whom I will give my word and my life to protect, no matter what happens. Just as Jules once did for me.

I lose myself in the feeling of that hug. I lost the sense of familiarity I felt at that moment. It's as if I've been transported back a few years, and the person in my arms is my best friend. I close my eyes tightly and suppress the urge to say everything. I never had the opportunity to speak to Jules one last time.

I love you. I miss you. I'm sorry. Thank you for being my hero. Stay.

I don't know how long we've stayed in this position, but I've returned to reality, or at least part of it when I hear a sniffle and a half sob behind Vincenzo. He must have heard it, too, as he squirms slightly in my arms, urging me to let go. He then turns to his mother and Marie, who are watching us, tears in their eyes.

Many things are happening on Marie's face, but for the first time since we learned of Vincenzo's existence, fear is not a part of any of them.

I watch her eyes shine with inspiration as she looks at the little boy in front of her, who looks back at her with sparkling eyes. They stand there, staring at each other for a few seconds, until Vincenzo tilts his head in confusion.

"Hi!" he greets with a shy smile. "Are you a princess?" I let out a low laugh, and Cecilia joined me. Marie bends down to his level. Her right hand slowly traces Vincenzo's face as if she wants to capture every feature.

"You look just like your dad," her voice falters with emotion, and Vincenzo extends a hand, mimicking her movements.

"Were you also a friend of Daddy, Princess?" He smiles openly, and Marie quickly nods with closed eyes, savoring the affection Vincenzo is showing.

"Yes, my love. I was excellent friends with your daddy," she says in a soft voice, and just as he did with me, Vincenzo throws himself into Marie's arms, who holds him instantly and presses him tightly against her.

I approach the two and give Marie a sideways hug, running my hands through Vincenzo's small curls.

(...)

"And this here is my Lawi Hamilton car," Vincenzo shows me another one of his toy cars when we reach the small room he shares with his mother. "It's my favorite," he says, and Marie laughs beside me when I can't hide my grimace.

"And a Ferrari? Don't you like Ferrari?" I ask him, and he leaves me confused for a few seconds.

"Fewawi? Is that the red car that breaks?" He innocently asks, and this time Marie bursts into laughter. I nod and give her a dirty look. "Fewawi is cool, Shal. But I like Cedes," he says, his eyes sparkling with the name of Mercedes, and I can't help but smile.

"Alright, I'll make you change that over time. At least it's not Redbull," I say, and Marie shakes her head, the huge smile still on her face.

"Edbull is the best! I like Edbull!" He says, and I choke on the air.

"But that's not possible!" I am incredulous, and Marie already has tears in her eyes from laughing so much.

"Don't be mad, Shal! I'll like Fewawi too, I promise!" Vincenzo extends his pinky finger towards me, and I catch it with mine, crossing them in a promise.

"I think that's great because you're going to spend a lot of time in the Ferrari box with me, little man," I say, picking him up, and he laughs.

"And are we going to meet Lawi Hamilton?" He asks excitedly, and I nod with a smile.

"Well, he won't be in the Ferrari box, but we can go to the Mercedes one; how about that?" I ask, and Vincenzo lets out a scream of happiness and hugs me tightly.

"Thank you, Shal! Are you coming too, Princess?" He turns to Marie, who looks at me awkwardly, unsure what to answer.

It has been a long time since Marie walked through the Paddock; the last time was months before Jules' death when we both ended our relationship. And I understand that for her, it might be a bit challenging.

"The Princess will go when she's ready," I say, looking at Marie. "And when she's ready, we'll both be there to hold her hands and ensure she doesn't feel scared, right?" I ask, shifting my gaze from Marie to Vincenzo, and the little boy in my arms jumps, making me hold him tighter to prevent him from falling.

"Yes! And can we take mommy too, Shal?" I feel a shiver down my spine when he asks me. I look at Marie, who stares back at me with wide, sad eyes.

I don't know what to answer. I still need to understand my position here. Vincenzo will live with us, but I don't know who or how we would break this news to him. Even though I don't like Cecilia and disagree with her parenting methods, I still don't feel that this conversation should come from me but rather from Cecilia, who is still the boy's mother.

No child is ready to leave their mother, especially one so young. Cecilia is Vincenzo's world. The only absolute truth he knows, and I don't want him to lose that, even if it's something enforced.

"How about we check if Mommy has finished making dinner, Little One?" Marie asks, lifting the rug where Vincenzo is sitting. "Will you help me find the kitchen? This house is still a maze for me, and princesses can't wander in mazes without royal guards and knights in armor to watch over them, right?" Marie gestures and puts her hands on her chest, pretending to be a distressed damsel. Despite wanting to laugh at her horrible acting, I feel grateful she thought of something so quickly to distract the boy from his question.

"Yes, Princess! I'll protect you from monsters and bad guys!" Vincenzo says, striking a pose as a brave hero, making us laugh. "Shal, floor!" I understand what he means and bend down to safely put him on the floor.

Vincenzo takes Marie's hand, pulling her towards the door. She follows him briskly, and I stay in the room for a few more minutes, looking at the toys Vincenzo had left on the floor.

His question still echoes in my head. The feeling of wanting to shield him from any pain overwhelms me, but I know it's impossible for him not to suffer from Cecilia's future absence. I wonder if she is not going through the same, for I've known him for less than an hour, and I can't imagine being away from the boy for too long. Then I remember what she said earlier, her bitter words against herself, and how she doesn't want Vincenzo to be haunted by the ghosts of her mistakes.

And remembering the feeling I had earlier with him in my arms, this may be the universe's way of telling me that even though I no longer have my heroes around me, I still have the opportunity to be someone's hero.

And there, sitting on Spider-Man's play mat, holding the toy cars in my hands, I begin to understand, or at least I think I do. If I already love him, having just met him, it's clear that this is a nightmare for Cecilia. She has to leave her son, her only companion because guilt and the consequences of her mistakes always haunt her. Sacrificing her right as a mother rather than offering her son's happiness and future might not make her a terrible mother. Perhaps it's the only thing she has done right in her entire life.

"Come on, Shal! Many monsters want to take the Princess!" Vincenzo appears at the door, and I quickly get up, running towards him. After all, I can't let such a tiny being fight against so many monsters alone.

🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨🇲🇨

Hello! After months, I brought another part translated into English! I apologize for the delay, but it's truly challenging to translate into another language. This weekend, I will translate the other parts :) See You!

Tag list:

@woofgocows

@livinglifethroughfanfic @allthisfortommy

@kyomihann

@numafarawayglxy

@ushygushybaby

@lara03

@alwaysclassyeagle

@ru-kru @pjofics

[jesncin]

hello! i've been following you for a little while and have recently started trying to get into DC comics. i was wondering if you have any recommendations of good starting points? there's so much out there that it's a little overwhelming lol

Hi there! Thanks for checking out my stuff :) it can definitely be overwhelming getting into cape comics, but the flip side of that is that you can start just about anywhere and there's a weird freedom to that. Some comic runs will be more accessible than others (and I certainly prefer those!) but if you ever find yourself not vibing with a run or not getting it, then you can drop it and hop onto something else (cough me and All Star Superman cough).

Lots of the stand alone graphic novels are self contained and designed to get new readers into the world of DC, so even if they're their own AUs, they can help you bounce into the other comics. Some very accessible to new reader comics off the top of my head (sorry my biases will be obvious):

Superman Smashes the Klan

All New Superman

Martian Manhunter 2019 Identity (polarizing, but very accessible)

Superman American Alien (the writer's a creep but story's pretty good)

The One Bad Day Series Anthology covering Gotham rogues is fun (I recommend the Clayface one, but I also enjoyed Two Face's!)

Haven't read it yet but I'm always recommended Wonder Woman Historia

Alan Scott Green Lantern (I read the first issue, and it's really accessible)

Girl Taking Over: A Lois Lane Story

The Mystery of the Meanest Teacher: A Johnny Constantine Graphic Novel (I KNOW MIDDLE GRADE CONSTANTINE SOUNDS WRONG BUT THIS IS REALLY FUNNY AND ENJOYABLE)

og Vertigo Hellblazer (I'm currently trying to read through it all and I haven't needed much context coming in)

Supersons (any, I found all to be understandable even when wacky things happen)

Batgirl: Future's End #1 (this is a one-shot from the new 52 but it's cute and holds a special place in my heart)

The Killing Joke (controversial but DC's perennial best seller for a reason. I recommend it so that you can read:) and The Batman Chronicles 1995 #5 (for a palate cleanser co-written by Kim Yale who was battling cancer and wrote that personal experience into Babs)

Batgirl / Robin Year One (much like American Alien, the writer sucks but ugh I really like these stories)

So yeah! I think that's plenty, but there's many more comics that I just jumped into and was able to understand and get really invested in. The world's yer oyster

[cheriladycl01]

Goodbye NewYork - Grid and Daniel Ricciardo x Sunshine Driver! Reader

Plot: Y/N constantly jokes about the fact that she would take a bullet for any of the guys on the grid... however in 2026 when the FIA decide to make a New York track, with it not being policed as well as they have in the past Y/N turns those jokes into a reality.

A/N: Yes i know its dramatic ... but that's why you all are here! You love the fluff and the angst and the drama.

Warnings: Violence w/ Guns

2017 Rookie season Interview Age 22:

Interviewer - So, how has it been driving for Mclaren Honda alongside a world champion like Fernando Alonso.

Y/N - Oh wow its been a fever dream. He's taught me so much, and excited not only to be racing with him next year but with Renault as our engine manufacturer!

Interviewer - And who would you say have you become friends with this year?

Y/N - I think obviously i would consider Nando and I very close, you know we've travelled together and he even invited me back to Spain with him in the summer break. Other than that I've found myself close to Pierre, Daniel and Carlos, I've known Pierre for a long time back since karting days, same with Max and Charles who will be joining us next year in Sauber.

Interviewer - Thank you Y/N we really loved watching you drive this year and we can wait for next year!

2018 First Full Season Interview Age 23:

Interviewer - Hello again Y/N how are you!

Y/N - I am good and yourself?

Interviewer - Yes, obviously you've had a great year in Mclaren but they've decided against continuing with you and Fernando next year. This leaves you moving to Toro Rosso alongside Rookie Alex Albon. You said at the end of last year you'd made fast friends with him, Carlos and Daniel. Do they still stand where Carlos is taking over the Mclaren seat.

Y/N - Of course I'm really happy for Carlos, I performed well in Mclaren this year, but i think Lando Norris is a promising rookie and Carlos is an excellent driver. It didn't shock me when the Red Bull Junior team reached out to me as I was a junior driver for Red Bull. Obviously I'm gutted I wont be racing with Pierre this year but I've met Alex and we get on well!

Interviewer - Any new friends?

Y/N - Erm not really new no. Charles joined us this year and has driven fantastically and is going to Ferrari next year. I cannot wait to see what he can bring in a competitive car

Interviewer - Still friends with Daniel?

Y/N - Of course, the honey badger and i are closer than ever, he had some big decisions to make going in 2019 and he needed someone to support him. He's just a ball of sunshine and I'm not being dramatic when i say i would die for that man

Interviewer - Ah your so funny Y/N its always a pleasure to talk to you. Well i wish you all the best for this year to come and hopefully 2019 we can see a P1 finish!

2019 Season Interview Age 24:

Interviewer - Ah and here we have my absolute fave to interview at the end of the year it is Y/N Y/L/N!

Y/N - Hello!

Interviewer - Woah may i say what a year its been for you, this time last year and we will roll the clip here, you said you were gutted to not be racing alongside Pierre but here we are at the end of the 2019 season and you've raced the last half of the season with him when Red Bull switched out drivers

Y/N - Alex is a very promising driver, you know he proved that he was a good driver in Toro Rosso and i think he is proving that in Red Bull, its a shame that Pierre had to go because i think he was just getting used to a car that is clearly built for Max's driving technique which is very different from the rest of ours. The pressure isn't easy to be the second driver in Red Bull

Interviewer - Is that why you turned down Christians offer to take Pierre's place and they went with Alex?

Y/N - Not completely no, I think I've pushed my car to the limit this year and we've learnt a lot as a team so we will come back bigger and better next year with some major changes to the team. I think I would do well in Red Bull but I want to prove myself first

Interviewer - Incredible, really and your friends how's that going?

Y/N - It's amazing, each year i get closer and closer to these guys and i genuinely can call most of them my friends, I've enjoyed getting to know the rookies over this year I'm really close to Alex, Lando and George. You know me and Lewis have shared some really funny moments this year, me and Seb went fishing in March... its been a fantastic year both on and off track.

Interviewer - How important are these boys to you.

Y/N - Oh they are most important to me, my whole heart goes out to them.

2020 Season Interview Age 25:

Interviewer - What a year its been with this pandemic, but we are finally here back in Abu Dhabi, and weve just completed the last race of the 2020 season and there's some exciting changes for you next year!

Y/N - Yes it was sooner than i was hoping for, but I was told that my seat was being taken by Yuki Tsunoda who will be a rookie on the 2021 Season. Where it was so late in the year, i wouldnt have had a seat and I think as a woman i would have struggled to get that seat back. So i grabbed at the Red Bull offer.

Interviewer - That's amazing news for you, has it however affected any of your friendships?

Y/N - Everyone, even Alex told me i would be stupid not to go for it so i did. I'm very thankful to Christian for this opportunity. I know there were other people who were thinking it would be there seat, but I'm in F1 to win.

Interview - There's also been some... rumors about you and a certain Australian going around the paddock.

Y/N - Yes Daniel and i started dating this year, it was actually really funny. I joke to him how I'm only dating him due to my Stockholm Syndrome of being in lockdown with him.

Interviewer - You were with Daniel throughout lockdown?

Y/N - Yes we were at the Australian GP when we heard about it, my flight got cancelled and then they shut down all air control and i was basically stuck in Australia, with the risk as well it wasn't worth it so i got tested and then Daniel offered me to stay with him. Obviously was longer than expected but yeah we came out as a couple.

Interviewer - Amazing honestly, who do you see having a good come back next year?

Y/N - Oh i think Mercedes will be strong, same with AlphaTauri, I think Ferrari also have a fantastic line up with Carlos Sainz moving there. Obviously my boyfriend is going to Mclaren and i couldn't be happier that he's keeping his seat and working with someone as great a driver as Lando

Interviewer - And how does that work, tension wise with him being ex Red Bull and you now being a driver in what was his seat only 3 seasons prior

Y/N - Obviously i know that with Max Verstappen being as good a driver as he is the pressure is insane in that second Red Bull seat and you are very much that ... a second. So I've talked to the team and said that you know, if I'm the stronger car and the better driver that I don't want Golden Boy to be prioritized. He really helped me make my decision in the end.

Interviewer - Amazing thank you for your time Y/N.

2021 Interview Age 26:

Y/N - Hello lovely people its so nice to see you without masks on!

Interviewer - Yes we agree! Congrats on some fantastic driving this year it really showed how quickly you can learn a car. You really rivalled Max Verstappen and Hamilton this year. 2022 will be your year. It's amazing how you helped steal that Constructors title from Mercedes. I bet Christian is very happy with your performance i mean we can tell he is from that long 2024 contract extension...

Y/N - Yeah its been a really amazing year of racing. Max has been an amazing team mate, you know he's really supported by move to Red Bull and we've had an amazing year with a really good lineup, a really good car and i cant wait for next year.

Interviewer - So, to the questions we really have to ask, obviously you and Daniel have been dating for 2 years now, and someone found a clip from when you were friends jokingly saying you'd die for him. Is that still the case now that he's progressed to boyfriend.

Y/N - Honestly i wasn't joking I would lay my life down on the tarmac and let someone run we over at 300mph if it meant anyone on the current grid was happy. They have each given me something so special and so close to my heart, whether that be a gift, or a life lesson, or a hug, or advise... they honestly most of them have saved me on my darkest days when i considered leaving the sport.

Interviewer - And how do you feel about Albon's return as he joins Williams Racing in 2022

Y/N - I mean i kept in contact with Alex for the whole season, I invited him to some of the races with my passes and yeah we've hung out with Lily his girlfriend who i get on with really well. So I'm extremely happy to be racing against him again.

2022 Season Interview Age 27:

Y/N - I'm really sorry but I'm gonna have to make this quick, because my plane will leave soon and I have to grab my things from the hotel.

Interviewer - Of course no problem. It's been a fabulous year with you coming Third in the Drivers Championship, just a few points behind Charles Leclerc... and having the second win for Constructors... how do you feel.

Y/N - Yeah there was some really close moments where it could have been me, Max or Charles. We started of the season a little rocky and some miscommunication but then Ferrari's strategy got worse while ours improved which meant Max and I were getting those crucial points.

Interviewer - Leaning away from the racing ... how are you and Danny Ricciardo now that he wont be in the 2023 season...

Y/N - We've come to an agreement with Red Bull that he will come to every race with me to be my race engineer ...

Y/N - I'm kidding but he will still be attending with me as he's gonna be a reserve driver so he'll be a quick standby option.

Interviewer - Amazing thank you for your time

2023 Season Interview Age 28:

Interviewer - Another win from Max Y/N, he's a three time World Champ now and you were close coming in second again. How are you feeling confident for 2024, or worried you loose your seat.

Y/N - Holy shit, you sound so cryptic and me and Christian have already been talking about a contract extension. I'm happy in Red Bull and he believes I'm driving on par with Max and I'd like to see a lengthy future with them.

Interview - So are we hearing 2024 will be your year?

Y/N - Yes i think working with Max has led me to learn the way he drives very well, I'm able to anticipate what he's going to do, and I can out maneuver him easier than most. I'm excited to see what 2024 will bring us.

Interviewer - And of course, I have to ask now that you've been with Mr Ricciardo for 4 years now, going strong and you have some amazing bonds with your fellow drivers on the grid are we going to see and F1 wedding anytime soon?

Y/N - Oooo i mean Y/N Ricciardo does sound nice, I think where he is coming back onto the grid this year, the timing wouldn't make sense but ... you know I think anything can happen.

Interviewer - Oh she's so cheeky with that wink ... Hello Charles how are you feeling.

2024 Season Interview Age 29:

Interviewer - Oh Y/N what an awful year this has been, i bet you and Max cant wait to say goodbye to this car. P4 in the constructers... what happened.

Y/N - I think Max and I struggled driving this car, which was both a skill issue on our half and a team issue of Red Bull's half, we had lost of changes of team members throughout the year, lots of miscommunication but I promise 2025 we will come back bigger and better. I'm so happy for Charles getting his World Championship finally and I'm incredibly proud of two of my sons getting their Maiden race wins... Lando and Oscar congrats. And on my other son, for getting his first Maiden podium and proving everyone wrong and having an amazing second season in Williams, well done Logan. Well done to Ferrari, Mclaren and Mercedes for Constructors Top 3, but watch out for us next year.

Interviewer - Amazing, its so nice to see how proud and close you are too the other drivers.

Y/N - Yes, i would change none of that.

2025 Season Interview Age 30:

Interviewer - And here we are with the first ever Female World Champion of Formula One, Y/N you've hit some amazing achievements this year. You've become a WDC, you got engaged to you soulmate, you hit 30 years old, you had such a great car and great races. How are you feeling.

Y/N - I have no words for this year, you know I was starting to think maybe my time is up. But my contract in Red Bull lasts till 2028 to match Max contract and you know I'm happy, still driving well clearly and yeah I've loved every moment of this year.

Interviewer - And do you think 2028 would be your retirement year?

Y/N - Oh i don't know about that ... I love racing and you know, Daniel and I are happy and obviously the F1 wedding will be soon. We've said we are happy to wait a while for kids, so we'll see how it goes...

Halfway through the 2026 Season.

BBC News:

And we bring some shocking news to you tonight. F1 Driver Y/N Ricciardo is in critical condition after being shot on race weekend here in New York City. It was reported that the drivers were all celebrating her recent wedding to fellow F1 Driver Daniel Riccardo last month in Australia. The race according to the FIA and surrounding authorities wasn't well protected and put a lot of the drivers in danger. Y/N celebrated a first place podium the same day she was shot, with fellow drivers Charles Leclerc and Oscar Piastri. More Updates will be shared at 10 tonight.

F1 Instagram:

Y/N Ricciardo, in critical condition after altercation at New York Grand Prix.

We are sending our thoughts to her family and the people affected at this time...

Comments -

landorizlover02 - omg this is so scary, the videos on twitter of them all celebrating in the paddock and then the screams

f149 - sources say Y/N actually saw the person before anyone else and pushed Daniel, Lando and Oscar out the way before stepping closer to the man so he would aim for her and not the others. Talk about fight or flight!

kimiisfoine - she is literally a hero ... I'm in shock.

carloschili - I've seen the video, and her face when she realizes something isn't right and then she literally pulls Lando behind her and pushes Daniel and Oscar away.

The drivers tweets -

@PierreGASLY - I'm deeply upset by the lack of protection at the New York GP, I hope that this teaches, the FIA when we are on street circuits like this extra security measures are needed. I wish Y/N a full recovery <3

@Charles_Leclerc - Y/N saved my life tonight and I will never forget that. Alex and I are sat here shaking in shock, i wish for her full recovery and send my prayers to Daniel and her family.

@RGrosjean - Y/N was one of the best people I've ever met on the grid, having scary crashes is part of the job. Never did i think that this would ever be possible. Wishing Y/N to get better!

@KevinMagnuessen - I wasn't there, but hearing the panic and lockdown annoucement is never something I want to experience again. #dobetterf1

@Carlossainz55 - Y/N is one of my best friends and the fact that his has happened to such a happy and bright individual is so sad. I hope to see Y/N soon and am staying in New York until i no longer can in hopes to see her.

@LandoNorris - I never thought I'd be standing behind someone who has acted like my older sister in this sport, who has become a true friend as she takes a bullet to save me from an evil individual. I am in the hospital with Daniel now, awaiting news on her.

@LewisHamilton - Y/N has been an exceptional individual both on and off track, I hope the FIA do better in the future to protect us as drivers.

@OscarPiastri - I have no words for what occurred tonight... no words.

.... more loading

"Y/N baby please" Daniel says as he looks at you, you'd just got out of surgery to remove the bullets. The doctors said that you were lucky that Max and the Mclaren pitstop worker had acted as quickly as possible to get the gun away from the man. Daniel held you as you fell to the ground from the pian holding the wound that was bleeding out.

"How is she?" Lando asks coming into the room with two coffees. Handing one over to Daniel.

"There was a lots of strain on her body, so they don't know if she'll wake up..." Daniel breathes slowly.

"When she wakes up, man... When. She's the strongest person I know" Lando sighs tears in his eyes.

"I fucking froze, I watched a she pulled me behind her after she pushed you and Osc away..." Lando cries a little.

"And I do it again Lan" a course and strained voice breathes out.

"Y/N! Hunny oh my god" Daniel cries smiling at you.

"Hey darling" you smile a little strained.

"I'll go get the doctor!" Lando says rushing out to grab a nurse.

"I love you so much, you are without a doubt the strongest woman I know!" he says kissing your forehead and cheek.

"I love you to baby"

"When do you recon i can race again" you ask after a silent moment making him cry out a laugh tears still falling from his eyes wondering how you can be thinking about that already.

"My little racer, huh" he sighs looking over at you.

"I love you, never ever do that again!" he says.

"I'd do it a million times over if it means you are sat where you are right now..."

A/N: This feels borderline social media au... and i kinda want to get into it... but I love writing out the angst and tumblr still confuses me with picture sizing and stuff so I'm not sure...

Taglist:

@littlesatanicassholebitch @hockey-racing-fubol @laura-naruto-fan1998 @22yuki @simxican @sinofwriting @lewisroscoelove @cmleitora @stupidandunnecessary @clayra-g @daemyratwst @honey-belden @moonypixel @lauralarsen @vader-is-hot @ironcowboycopnickel @itsjustkhaos @the-untamed-soul @beebo86 @happylittlereader @ziejustme @lou-larcher5 @thewulf @purplephantomwolf @chasing-liberosis @chillyleclerc @chanthereader @annoyingmoonballoon @summissss @evieepepi08 @havaneseoger08 @celesteblack08 @gulphulp @fandom1ruined2me @celebstories @starfusionsworld @jspitwall @sierruhh @georgeparisole @dakotatankbig @youcannotcancelquidditch @zzonsbeek @tallbrownhairsarcastic @mellowarcadefun @ourteenagetragedy @otako5811 @countingstacksandpanicattacks @peachiicherries @formulas-bitch @cherry-piee @hopexcroc @mirrorball-6 @spilled-coffee-cup @mehrmonga @bigsimperika @blueberry64857959 @eiraethh @lilypadlover @curseofhecate @alliwantisadonut @the-fem1n1ne-urge @21stcenturytaegi @dark-night-sky-99 @spideybv28 @i-wish-this-was-me @tallrock35 @butterfly-lover @barnestatic @landossainz @darleneslane @barcelonaloverf1life @r0nnsblog @ilove-tswizzle

[dustbunnylair]

Shubble/Shelby's Situation: People Defending The Abuser and Shaming The Victim (!TW: Mentions of abuse/abusive relationship!)

7 months ago, on February 21st, 2024, a Twitch streamer with around 468K followers spoke out about being abused by another Twitch streamer and artist, who is now her ex on a stream titled, “Talking About Something More Serious”. The Twitch streamer who spoke out goes by Shubble or Shelby, she described the at the time unnamed Twitch streamer as (mainly) British, popular, and also in the music industry, fans quickly connected the dots to the popular Twitch streamer and lead singer in the band, Lovejoy, Wilbur Soot. 

I won’t go into full detail about what Shubble said, as I would prefer for people to listen to her say it, rather than someone else. But, the main things were that Wilbur did not follow a safe word that they set in place, and would bite her to the point of her screaming out in pain. He was also slobbish and dirty in his living situation. Unfortunately, Shubble has not provided any proof of bruises, markings, etc. but that doesn’t mean she’s lying, not every abuse victim documents their injuries, and honestly in my opinion, maybe she’s uncomfortable with sharing those injuries, those injuries are really none of our business to see.

A few days later, Wilbur Soot, made a response, which if you would like to read it you can find it here, I’ll sum it up to what I had processed within the response:

First off, he says it’s a response rather than an apology. Second, he didn’t even mention Shubble’s name, he only referred to her as “ex-girlfriend” or “this person” he never said her name. I want that to be emphasized because that’s quite common in abusers, they literally will not say their victim’s name(s) as a form of dissociation or just not taking accountability.

Many people including famous people such as Ranboo, Tommyinnit, Sneegsnag, Lil Tay, Billzo, Aimsey, Dream even, to fully call out Wilbur, as they should. Let’s also emphasize how absolutely batshit insane it is that Lil Tay and Billzo said shit about him, Lil Tay does not know this man and Billzo is literally never active on social media, no hate to them though obviously, shoutout to them for calling him out. Dream responding to Wilbur is so diabolical, you know an apology/response sucked ass when DREAM of all people responds to you and REWRITES the response. 

I have found many people on social media, more specifically TikTok and Pinterest, borderline defending Wilbur Soot. From getting mad at Shubble for telling her viewers to stream her stream instead of Wilbur's newest song, which yeah is a bit immature coming from a 30 y/o woman, but remember this is literally her abuser and she’s probably just joking around and coping. Not to mention the person who “called out” Shubble for not being able to “move on” can’t move on from Shubble nor Wilbur themselves.

Hypocrite alert…Honestly, Wilbur defenders are either stuck in 2019-2021 or are just insanely parasocial. Wilbur does not know you, you do not know him, he is a content creator and singer. I *was* a Wilbur fan before “Your New Boyfriend” came out, and look, I’ve moved on from him, 5 years of my life went to waste but at least I’m not supporting an abuser. It’s so funny seeing Wilbur dick riders getting mad at people for calling him niblur soot or saying he has rabies and needs a muzzle. 

It’s always “always believe the victim” until the abuser is someone you like or is conventionally attractive. I’ve seen multiple people ask why Shubble hasn’t sued Wilbur but has sued a car company. It’s so obvious that these people do not know shit about abusive relationships. Almost like if you were to take it to court and sue him, it wouldn’t change anything for Shubble other than some money or some shit, it doesn’t change the fact that she has trauma from the abuse, and it certainly isn’t gonna make him take accountability. Plus abuse in women or literally any gender, is invalidated most of the time.

People say that Wilbur is getting therapy just from his word. But me and other people are clearly seeing he isn’t showing change whatsoever, in fact, he literally looks like he’s on drugs, like coke. I remember someone made a TikTok talking about how skinny Wilbur looks and saying he’s probably starving himself. He’s 6’5 and has always been fucking lanky, and starving yourself isn’t the only thing that makes you lose weight, it’s also drugs!

I’m honestly just so sick and tired of seeing people say “Shubble admitted to lying” and then when you ask for proof of that they don’t respond, because she’s never admitted to that. Even other creators, not just Shubble, have come out and said Wilbur’s abusive behavior, like Tommyinnit. I mean, James Marriott hasn’t spoken out about this, and he doesn’t have to, that’s not something that’s required from him, but in one of James Marriott’s videos from 3 years ago, he and Wilbur did like this drunk video and it was called “If We Laugh, The Video Ends…(ft. Wilbur Soot)”, but throughout the video Wilbur just sometimes gets violent, and it doesn’t seem like a bit because most of the time James reacts genuinely concerned.

And before anyone uses the “Oh but he was drunk” excuse, I don’t want to hear it, the more drunk you are, the more of the real you comes out, he was drunk as fuck and his real self was coming out. 

Yeah, honestly that’s all I have to say about this topic for right now. Don’t go harass Wilbur or any Wilbur supporters, just try to educate them or block them, both are valid. If I have more to add I’ll make a follow-up post. But yeah, always believe the victim, don’t defend abusers. Keep yourself safe.

[sarcasticscribbles]

Artschool Dropout

I made a thread about how and why I became an artschool dropout, and want to share it here too. Storytime! It's mainly a highlight of parts I despite in the art worlds; capitalism and superiority. My experience was affected by the environment, and hell was a bad environment

Back in the distance year of 2019 I went to an(community) art college in like the *fancy* part of my area. I lived across the lake on the countryside, so I was not prepared for this environment. Rich people cosplaying poor is the best description. Fancy clothing made to look dirty and no-one wore shoes. It was very networking-vibe, with "omg we HAVE to talk more later" but never doing so. Like nurses energy. To be fair I became more and more non-approachable as time went on.

A good note is that Swedish education is normally free, even uni degrees, but this one cost money. It was that was never addressed or mentioned when I applied; that's on me maybe, but the few friends I had didn't know either. A lot was beaten around the bush when it came to expenses. A big draw for the school was a trip they made to Berlin during a film festival. Once the time came around they mentioned the cost for the trip (which was not mentioned before, I thought it was included) and kinda of shamed people if they wouldn't pay and go. Saying how its a highlight of the education and the few staying behind just watch movies for a week. In addition, the film festival wasn't included in the price, and we would have to pay extra to go. It was supposed to be a week, but two days was for travelling by train.

The price was something I would rather use for a private Berlin trip. It wasn't a lot, but I refused to do it, mainly for how indirect they were with everything. A friend and I said we wouldn't go and a staff complained how they would have to keep the school open just for us.

My classmates weren't an issue, it was the teachers and system, which all just felt like a money laundering scheme. One day we travelled to Stockholm, and we were tasked to go four hours alone, sit and stare at an object and think what it made is feel. Those were the instructions.

Four hours. Alone. Then home.

I and one other instead went to grab a coffee and trash talk. Once the time was up, I just made up on the spot "what it made me feel" and he gave me a job well done. I understand the assignment, but the execution from the teacher was all wrong.

It wasn't my crowd tho, I came from a gaming development High school while these people were like, social studies. I'm used to a nerdy crowd, is what I'm trying to say.

I have two funny examples:

I was talking to some guy during a break the ice get together with the whole school (very small school) and I explained I studied video game development before, and he said "omg that's so cool!!" And I answered, "yeah! Do you play?" And he said "yes, the piano :)"

And other time we were talking about painters, and when they asked me who my favourite was, I thought I would joke and said "oh, donatello :) because I love purple" and NO ONE got my tmnt ref and instead thought some Italian Renaissance was my favourite artist.

But back to the main issue, it was the school: First day our teacher handed us supplies from a closet and I was like "wow! Thank you! When these run out (BECAUSE WE'RE FKN ARTISTS) can we grab new ones in the closet?" And she said "no :) this is for the two years you are here" Like eight different hardness pens and a block of paper.

My worse experience was that every Tuesday was lecture day (although we didn't have grades nor exams) and all students gathered in a dark room to look at a PowerPoint about culture and people.

Fun in theory, but again executed so badly. My last lecture one teacher said "oh, and we gotten complaint not everyone can take notes during the presentation, so we thought one from each class could take notes and share with everyone else later :)! Any volunteer?"

Like ??? What? I raised my hand and said "you have a PowerPoint there? Why can't just share the presentation with everyone if they want to go back later?" AND SHE ANSWERED "that is a great idea, but unfortunately that would take weeks. So this is a better alternative:)"

TO THIS DAY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT SHE MEANT BY THAT

Smaller details ; expensive lunch, creepy teacher keeping images of women's privates on screen (and I'm an artist I don't mind nudity) pointless activities and little progression. I can't give it a fair judgement, I only lasted three weeks but jumped in the opportunity to leave.

Cherry on top was I had communicated in private with my mentor about quitting and the day it was decided I had to go back to get my stuff and have one last day and the teacher (not my mentor) exclaimed in the shadiest way "Sophie? I thought you quit" I hadn't told my friends yet.

Last day I replaced all my supplies with new from the fancy closet, and me and my friends stole coffee from the cafeteria during lunch (it was only included if you bought food) to celebrate my time. We all hated the system of the school, but all of us loved art.

My experience is mainly the environment the school was located in; upper-class pretending not to be. The people were alright and i got a few friends before quitting. It was also traditional, general art when I prefer digital art. The school, system, and teacher were hell, which is a shame because it took something I loved and turned it into all the things I hate. i don't regret going and I don't regret quitting when I did. Best thing to come out of it was my literal label Artschool Dropout