#GOTTA GET THEM GAY RAINBOWS IN YA KNOW

[unfunnyaceartist]

funny elementary stories with Ace

Me: *drawing a rainbow* ”Friend”: *hands me a black marker* Here you go Me: oh I don’t need that I’m making a rainbow “Friend”: THATS RACIST AND IM TELLINGGGG Me: 🤯😱 ———————————— Me: *name* Lueza? More like *name* the PIZZA HAHA Him: don’t call me that *sniffle* that’s really mean Me: OHIMSOSORRYYYY Him: That’s gay (<— back when it was just thrown around as an insult and we didn’t know the meaning) Me, very much female: NO ITS NOT —————————— Me: HAHA I GOT JUMBO (name of a friends squishmallow) Friend: *TACKLES THE SHIT OUT OF ME* —————————— Me: well I mean, you did say a really mean thing so I get why she’s sad Friend: *Stabs my hand with a pencil (hard)* shut up Me: *gasp* OW IM TELLINGGGGG Friend: WAIT NO IM SORRY I DIDNT MEAN TO- ——————————— Me: *being actually harassed because I didn’t like a guy back and so he and his friends were trying to force me to date him by chasing me around* Boys: *not listening to when I asked them to stop* Me: *hides behind a wall* Boy: Where the heck did she go? Is she Spider-Man or somethin- oh there she is ———————— Friend and me singing songs on the radio Her: SHUT UP AND DANCE WITH ME Me: NO THATS A BAD WORD YOU HAVE TO SAY BE QUIET AND DANCE WITH ME Her: OH NO REALLY? Me: MHMMMMM ———————— Me and a friend talking to a friend a year younger than us Me: you gotta cover your ears okay Friend my age: mhm we are gonna sing something and you’re too young it has a bad part Tiny friend: Okay *covers ears* me and friend: CLOSE YOUR EYES AHUT YOUR MOUTH DREAM A DREAM AND GET US OUT DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM HIT THE HAY FAST ASLEEP DREAM A DREAM YA LITTLE BLEEP DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM DREAM tiny friend, smirking smugly: I heard that me and friend: no those are the words tiny friend, looking disappointed: oh… ————————

YES THESE WERE ALL ACTUAL REAL STORIES I REMEMBER

[serendertothesquad]

Seren's Studies: Wordsville's Official Release -- Is It Really an Odd Squad Clone? (Part 1)

You can bet your fine ass I am, because, to put it nicely, the fuck is this?

All right. Anyway. So part of what I used to weaponize my YouTube channel for was doing Seren Reacts videos on new PBS Kids shows. Basically, I'd take the first episode they'd upload and react to it. Since I don't have the capacity to actually do that for this show, and since I did tell you all I'd do a Seren's Study on Wordsville when it came out and I had a chance to see it...here ya go. I watched the first episodes of this thing so you don't have to!

...Uh...well...if you don't want to, anyway.

In this essay, I'm going to put the final nail in the coffin as to the issue of whether Wordsville is truly an Odd Squad ripoff or not. I'll also be picking apart the first episode screencap by screencap, just like I used to do in the good old days of Odd News.

(At the very least, the America's Funniest Home Videos animation I'm not a fan of. At least with Tom Bergeron it was funny.)

Below the break we go!

(Just as a side note: this will be split into multiple parts because Tumblr apparently has a photo limit now. That's...gonna make these followup Seren's Studies just a bit trickier.)

Ohhhh they're really trying, bless their little hearts.

Look at that, they even threw in a goddamn university degree like these kids up and went to Harvard. Because Odd Squad agents didn't go to university and aw God man you gotta be shitting me.

Man, the theme even follows the same schtick of Odd Squad agents explaining who they are and what they do! I guess that's one for the Half-Ass list...

(And on a related note, because I don't think I brought this up: Gabby's actress sounds like she was on Odd Squad at one point, but hell if I know where. Guess I'll know when the credits come up.)

Hm. Hah. Just like, y'know, Olive and Otto, Orla and Omar at one point in ti- really, do I have to keep going?

You could tell me this was an Odd Squad sequel spinoff in disguise and I'd 100% believe you.

(Also is that...is that a rainbow bead design in the upper right there? Does Sly is gay or am I just going nuts because this episode was uploaded in Pride Month and Sinking Ship already has some LGBTQ+ rep under their belt?)

I will say that, unlike with Odd Squad, I appreciate them not making this out to be some stupidly thinly-veiled Zoom or Skype parody. It looks like a new fresh platform that isn't supposed to reference anything. I like that!

...Nah, not even I'm desperate enough to pry an Odd Squad jab out of this title.

I am, however, getting flashbacks to Wonderful Precure and people speculating about the colors in the title. If this were one of those seasons we'd have a group of five with a blue-green Cure as the leader, which would melt the Internet. Definitely. Maybe.

Also, unless they're working on Odd Squad UK and we don't know it yet, Christin Simms is not an Odd Squad name I recognize. Seems they've worked on pretty much every modern Sinking Ship series but Odd Squad, which I choose to take as intentional just due to the similarities between the two series alone. I mean let's be honest...if it were an Odd Squad writer, it would really only reinforce a few of my points.

So I've chosen to watch "The Case of the Disappearing Donuts", mainly because I believe that's the episode that was featured in the sample script I talked about in the previous Seren's Study. Just...y'know, as a heads-up. I tried to go for the first episode.

And needless to say...I'm not sure if this is it (TVO released five episodes in a bundle and your guess is as good as mine as to which one is the series premiere) but I can already see a striking difference with Odd Squad, in that yes, Wordsville does indeed launch us clear into the plot without any warning. Yeah yeah they explained it in the intro but I do not care. Let me get to know your characters first!

Once again, I will reiterate for you all: this show being purely digital instead of live-action completely hinders it. It is 2024. The pandemic is not an excuse anymore. I'd get more enjoyment out of this if it weren't two people communicating through mock Apple laptops.

And if you aren't getting what I'm picking at, imagine if, for the nearly ten years it's been on, Odd Squad was a purely-digital show. Would we get the worldbuilding? The lore? The character development? The funny interactions? No, no, no, and no. It's like the difference between talking to someone in video chat and talking to someone in real life. One boosts your health. The other one, not so much.

Clearly they didn't really try for this bit in the audio department, because this cookie is all about that bass with absolutely no fuckin' treble.

(To be fair, though, Odd Squad has soundbytes like this from time to time too. So I can't really complain all that much.)

Something I was shocked to find out about Wordsville: each episode is all of 8 minutes long. Which...doesn't really help the series' case because the pacing is utterly atrocious. For Odd Squad, which has mostly 11-minute episodes, the pacing is smoother for a lot of them. I can take my time, understand what's going on, and enjoy what I'm seeing. Hell, even Tiny Time Travel's pacing isn't awful for the short time it has, and I wasn't gonna even touch that show for this Seren's Study because it's not made by the same people outside of Tim...until people brought up similarities, and I felt at least obligated to mention it once.

This falls squarely into the category of "if I go on an acid trip, can I drag out this episode three times longer than it actually is?"

We.

Are 55 seconds in.

And we are already getting to the conflict.

...Hand me the bong. The BIG bong. If you see dogs in my front yard, just tell 'em to get inside and glow upstairs because I'm goin' hard.

BIG BONG.

...I'm not touching the timing of this call because convenience is in literally every piece of media with video chatting ever. It's not just a Wordsville thing.

The Town Baker walked so Baker Graham could work his hand at a whip.

No but seriously, I can't look at this character and not think of Chef O from Odd Squad UK. The brainrot set in once I viewed the trailer. It hasn't left.

Hey, it's a good marketing tactic.

And it makes a great gift for your SO if they happen to have a name that starts with any of the letters. Hell, get the U, the T and the I and you'd have a winner!

...

Waaaaaaait a second-

In this era of super-powerful processors and AI seeping into anything and everything, there is no scientifically possible way Gabby can pull up a computer dictionary within milliseconds.

And when Odd Squad, the show that has ironic low-tech stuff, is more realistic than your high-tech show, you got a problem.

Minute and a half into this thing and this is the only bit that got me close to smiling thus far.

But something I wanna point out is that I've gotten cookies from bakeries that look a lot better than that. Hell, the cookies at my local supermarket look better than that! Just as big, and far yummier!

I see they switched around the personalities for Sly and Gabby, and I can see why.

Gabby emotes the most.

So does Olive.

Gabby is Olive with a braid and a fedora.

Gabby is the serious o- guys, really, must I go on?

Something something substituting bagels like in "Soundcheck" for donuts instead.

This is what happens when you let your co-CEO binge-watch all the Shrek movies, Sly.

Careful, Gabby...please don't drop the title.

Odd Squad doesn't drop the title all that much, but the fact that the episodes are referred to as cases in-universe sells the comparison. Wordsville's cases are just...different. Copyright infringement and all that. When Oprah sues, she sues hard.

Thank you. I hate it. Off you will fuck from my lawn.

...Look, I know what the "Sly-mation" is and y'all are not being slick. You don't get to wave a fucking stylus in my face and say what you're doing is animation but with a fancy name. Animation is hard. Animating stuff halfway and slapping your client's head on their animated body instead of drawing a face resembling your client is a disservice and I will abso-fucking-lutely take that personally as a fan of animation.

I mean, hey, if I were an animator, I'd fully commit. You people remember that the studio who made this worked on a Spongebob movie. Lemme repeat: a Spongebob movie. And yet this is what they decide to do for animation.

When Odd Squad does animation, it's good in most instances. (I choose to forget "Olive and Otto in Shmumberland", TYVM.) Not anything stellar, but it certainly is passable. Here? Lol. Lmao, even. God no. This feels like a way to insert animation into the show but without employing the CGI that other shows, Odd Squad included, have. Like a "lol I'm so quirky" thing.

Get out.

This is like if Disney had Disneymation. Dreamworksation. Laikation. Netflixation. Huluation. So on and so forth.

Point being, it's dumb. Just say it's animation and stop plopping flowers onto it. When you get more of a time limit, then you can be quirky all you want.

We are now 2 minutes into an 8-minute episode. I know what's happening. Kids know what's happening. Unless you're banking on the research that kids' attention spans are the size of a pea, we do not need a recap.

...Is this really the same person who wrote for Endlings? Because apparently they can't handle something in an 8-minute timeframe.

You either get the Chad Blender/Flash/ToonBoom, or you get the Virgin Mock Scratch.

I just feel cheated. Disappointed. Like when your mom and dad drove by McDonald's when you were a kid after they promised you they would get you some. I've seen good animation. They had the chance to do better, and didn't. That's what pisses me off the most. It's that complete utter wasted potential.

I know Vet Wilder is a reference to some celebrity (the name is at least somewhat familiar), but I'm at a complete loss as to if they did the same thing for Athlete Glory or if they just confined a girl named Glory to one destiny in life.

So she'll become...a Faded Glory.

(I'm sorry, I had to.)

Okay, they're reiterating this for the young children, and I- guys, this hurts. It's like they're trying to differentiate themselves from Odd Squad but tripping over their own feet in the process.

Ten cookies Gene Vet Wilder gave it to an animal named Yummy and that this series will go down another Odd Squad route and defy biology.

Either that, or "Yummy" is his pet name for Not-So-Faded Glory, which I am banking absolutely nothing on because romance.

...No, not Baker Graham's cookies. I'm sure dude's good at what he does, but I know of a better bakery, thank you very much.

*aggressively takes out the ibuprofen for the headache this shit is giving me*

This reads like TVOkids font, and I'm not even mad.

I'm only sad I didn't get the "I know so much about fonts" autism.

(Also, this is really just called The Bakery? They have one bakery? That's it? Even Toronto has more than one!)

-----------------------------

Onward to Part 2!

[rei-does-stuff]

MAKE YOUR MARK CHAPTER 6 LIVE BLOG BABYYYYYYYY

EPISODE 1!!!!!!

-FIRSTLY I’ve been so fucking excited for this that I dreamt about it THATS RIGHT I DREAMT ABT IT

-This is gonna be the last mym chapter….:(((((

-OKOK LETS STARTT

-NO MORE SPARKY TRANSFORMING THE NETFLIX LOGO :((((

-MANESTREAM!!!

-SIBLING BONDING I LOVE THEM

-“Hold onto your cutie marks!” IN MORE WAYS THAN ONE SUNNY

-AAAA THE INTRO ITS THE LAST TIME WELL HERE THE INTRO!!!

-PIPPP YA GOTTA STOPPP

-I love you izzyyyyy

-HOW THE HELL DID SHE BLOW THOSE SO FAST, strong fuckin lungs

-BLAIZE!!!!

-All the dragons have the same model yes, but they all still look unique and pretty good IN MOTION

-OH SUNNY IS TERRIFIED

-Aww trying to put on her tough voice this is why ur my favorite sunny!!!

-AWW IZZYYYY

-I LOVE LUXXE

-Leaf is cuteee

-Tumble and him are def gay

-FOUNTAIN IS A LITTLE CREATURE….Well big creature but yk

-PIPPS FACEEE

-OH SO THEY HAVE THE SAME SHIT AS SPARKY

-OPALINEEEEE

-OOO SONG

-HER VOICE IM IN LOVE

-God that was sooo goodddd

-Love sunny rushing in to defend alicorns

-Also her putting her hoof around zipp GAYYYY

-MISTY I LOVE YOUU

-Hitch and your dad jokes I love youu

-Sunny trying to make friends with Blaize, IS THAT A PERSONALITY I SEE?

-Also her and Blaize? Rlly gay

-Love this green dragon (already forgot his name im a little dumb)

-SPIKEEE

-OH HIS VOICE WILL TAKE A WHILE TO GET USED TO BUT ITS NOT BAD, he finally has the deep voice he’s always wanted, good on you for the transition, plus he is total nonbinary goals

-AWW SAME HUMOR!!

-Also Sunny fangirling a bit

-AWW HE DOESNT REMEMBER :(

-TWILIGHT MENTION

-AW HIS LIL ‘Twi?’ OUGHHH

-okok so we were all pretty right on the real story!

-“You lost magic??” LMAO EVEN SPIKE IS LIKE ‘rlly???? After everything you rlly lost magic yall are wild mannn”

-When sunny gets excited her alicorn-ness starts to show, I’m not saying its a stim but it’s totally a stim

-AWW SUNNY REMINDS HIM OF TWILIGHT AAAA

-Love his speech but I wish they referenced how he thought the same but realized his true family were with other ponies

-GAYYY i need to see ship art of sunny and Blaize NOW

-ALSO WHY ARE YOU ON HER BACK SUNNY YOU CAN FLY, MORE REASON WHY SHES GAY

-YOU TWO PIPP AND ZIPP YOU CAN FLY!!!

-OUFHHHH THAT WAS SOOO GOOD!!!!

OKOK NEXT EP

EP 2

-TWO PARTER BABYY

-NO NOT THE TOGETHERNESS TREE

-The townsponies still freak just the same as g4, some things never change

-SPROUT

-‘And Pipp’s hair is still fabulous!’ I LOVE YOU ROCKY

-YEA MISTY WOULD KNOW

-LOVE THIS SPEECH UGHHH

-“That is…An option!” SUNNY DONT BE MEAN

-AWWW IM GONNA CRY

-PRINCESS SUNNY AAA

-FILLY MISTY

-‘SHE DOESNT KNOW HOW TO CHECK HER MESSAGES’ HAHAH

-NOOOO NOT THE DRAGONS

-SPARKY YOU ARE ON YOUR OWN

-OHH SHE KNEW SHE FUCKING KNEW MISTY BETRAYED HER

-GET HER ASS ANIMAL FRIENDS

-OOO YAY THE DRAGONS ARE BACK

-OOP NEVERMIND

-YES HITCH GET HER ASS

-OUGH SUNNY UNDERSTANDING HOW AFRAID MISTY MUST BE TO SEE HER ABUSER AGAIN AAAAA

-AAAAAA THAT WAS SOO GOOD

NEXT EP NEXT EP

EP 3!!!

-GRAB HITCHS CUTIE MARK MISTYY

-YESSS GO MISTY

-GET HER ASS

-GO AFTER YOUR GIRLFRIEND SUNNY

-OO PIPP YOU SMART

-WELL IT WORKED FOR A SEC

-UGHH I LOVE THIS INTERACTION BETWEEN MISTY AND OPALINE

-HEY YOU GOT TO DO YOUR PLAN IZZY

-SHE IS SO SMARTTT

-DAMN IT NOO

-‘We could just call’ I LOVE THEMMM

-THE NECKLACE

-NOT OPALINE PLAYING THE “you and I were not so different” CARD

-BUT ALSO SUNNY YA CANT REDEEM HER SORRY

-SPARKY YOU GOTTA BRING IT ALL BACK HOME

-SONGG

-DONT CRY REI AAAA

-NECKLACE TIME RAINBOW POWERR

-THEYRE RLLY PULLING OUT EVERY STOP

-ELEMENT OF HARMONY???

-HA GET YOUR CUTIE MARK WIPED

-AWWW

-CRYSTAL PONY TIMEEEE??

-AWWW THAT WAS AMAZING

LAST EP LAST EP

-40 MINS AND NEW NETFLIX PRESENTS LOGO

-THE MUSIC????

-THEYRE SO PRETTY

-ZIPP BEING WORRIED ABT HER GIRLFRIEND

-THEY DID ALL THE STOPS WITH THE VISUALS ITS SO PRETTY

-CRYSTAL TOWN CRYSTAL TOWN

-New threats maybe?

-MISTY I LOVE YOUU

-CRYSTAL PONIES

-SONG

-TRANCE???

-Auroricorns! New name for Crystal ponies?

-STARSHINE TIME

-AWW THEYRE ALL DOING CUTE EYES AT HITCH

-This is def giving me comfort special vibes!!!!

-Trip-Skating!

-STIMMING SO MUCH RN

-THEY DONT KNOW ABT EQUESTRIA

-Never allowed to leave? Ooooo

-SNOW PONIES

-GIRLFRIENDS AGREE WITH EACH OTHER

-If this keeps going this well this might be my fave ep

-WTFFF

-This is some freaky shit

-WTF ARE THISE????

-GRIFFINS??

-ANGEL BUNNY 2.0

-HER VOICEE

-So she’s like Opaline, but probably less fun? Interesting….

-Messed up tbh

-Maybe Allura will get a redemption arc?

-SUNIZZY CRUMBS

-SONG

-WOW she is stupid I love it

-DAMN THIS IS SOME OUR TOWN SHIT

-SNOWBALL FIGHTT

-YEA MISTY

-SONG

-So she might be back!

-VIOLET FROST

-AWWWW

-NEW FRIEND

-LETS GO COMET

-THEY EACH GETTING THEIR OWN FORM OF ELEMENTS OF HARMONY

-WHO IS THAT VOICE???

-BROTHER???

-THIS IS GETTING INTERESTING

-MANE 7 MAYBE??

-NEW GUY TOO

AAAAA I LOVED THAT, even tho there’s no more mym I’m sure tyt will be just as good once the episodes get longer!!

[ericsonclan]

Babe, Wake Up, It’s Pride Month

Summary: Clementine gets a friendly call from Duck kicking off Pride Month.

Word Count: 924

Read on AO3:

Clementine yawned as she started to make her way towards the bed. She was ready to get under the covers and watch the latest episode of Rupaul’s Drag Race with Louis. Her husband was currently completely absorbed in whatever was on his phone. He kept typing away while Clementine got into bed and kissed him on the cheek.

“Whatcha up to?”

“Getting the text ready for midnight.” Louis mumbled and before Clementine could say anything he spoke again. “It’s time! Send!” He whacked his thumb against his phone then went back to frantically typing. “Aasim, you’re next!”

Clementine’s lips parted, ready to ask what was on his mind when suddenly her phone started to ring. With a quick glance she saw who it was.

“Hey, Duck,”

“Happy Pride! How’s my favorite bi doing? Feeling gay? Because I sure do!” His voice blew up her phone, making Clementine hold it back from her ear.

“Hell yeah I’m feeling gay! And happy pride to you too,” She glanced over and saw the mountain of a text her husband was preparing. That’s why he was so glued to his phone. “So, you just calling to say ‘gay rights’ or are you wanting to party?”

“Seriously?!?! Hell yeah! Yo, Knox, wanna party at Clem and Louis’?”

Clementine could hear Duck’s partner say something but it was too quiet to tell what.

“Tell Oakley we won’t be too loud,” Clementine added.

“Okay, they said yes anyway but I’ll let them know! I gotta call one more person and then the pan squad will be there!”

Duck hung up without another word and Clementine shook her head. Oh yeah - maybe she should make a few more calls.

Violet grumbled as she kept hearing her phone ding with texts. She tried her best to ignore it and instead burrowed her face further into the crook of Prisha’s neck. She knew what those texts were gonna be. Pride celebrations could wait; all she wanted to do right now was be with her wife. Fate didn’t seem to agree with those plans though as there was a knock on their front door. Violet sighed but ignored it until it kept going and going.

“Mmm, what’s that sound?” Prisha mumbled as she tried to blink the sleep out of her eyes.

“It doesn’t matter. Whoever’s there is gonna go away,” But Violet was proven wrong when the knocking continued.

“I’ll go check who it is,” Prisha slipped out of bed before Violet could say otherwise and blindly wandered through the apartment. She double checked to make sure her pepper spray was within reach if worst came to worst. Unlocking the door, she opened it and was immediately surprised when colorful confetti of pinks, oranges and white hit her directly in the face.

“Happy Pride, ya gay!” Renata beamed at Prisha who looked completely exhausted and confused. Her feelings only deepened as Sophie popped her head into view.

“Whoa! Congrats on being gay!” Sophie blew into a rainbow party horn causing it to shoot out and whack Prisha in the forehead.

“Why are you two here at three in the morning?”

“Because it’s Pride Month! Now we gotta hurry - to the Everett household!’ Renata declared then was off like a shot with Sophie right behind. Prisha stood there for a moment then silently closed the door. It was too early in the morning to deal with this.

“Minnie, Min!”

Minnie heard her wife’s voice as she was shaken awake.

“Babe, wake up, it’s Pride month!”

Minnie groggily opened her eyes and saw Renata’s bright smile.

“Yay! You’re finally awake!’ Renata started to kiss all over Minnie’s face while the ginger started to wake up.”

“Ren, what time is it?” Minnie looked over at the clock and saw that it was five AM. Way earlier than Renata usually got up but not so much for her.

“Come on, we gotta go!” Renata pulled at Minnie who was still waking up.

“What? Where?”

“To the first of many celebrations!” Renata wiggled her eyebrows playfully then kept pulling her wife along. It took Minnie a while before she realized they were heading to her old family house. When she arrived she was met with a flurry of confetti to her face.

“WOOO! You’re gay!” Sophie grinned then disappeared back into the kitchen. Minnie followed behind Renata who was busy helping Tenn make colorful pride pancakes.

“Hey there, Firefly,” Walter walked over and gave his daughter a hug. “Happy pride,”

“Thanks,” Minnie was still a bit groggy. “Oh yeah, happy pride,” She watched as her dad let go of the hug and wandered back into the kitchen.

“Matthew, we’re gonna need some more coffee,”

“You got it!”

Minnie watched her family for a minute before she felt her phone buzz in her pocket. Glancing down she saw that she had a ton of texts with the most recent being from James. As she opened it she finally registered what it said.

Happy Pride 🏳️‍🌈 I hope you have a great start to the month. Also I was wondering if you wanted to join me on a walk later today. I found a great new hiking spot

Minnie smiled down at the message then sent one back.

Happy Pride 🏳️‍🌈 and yeah sounds good

She clicked through all the messages and worked to reply to some when she heard her wife’s voice again.

“Minipie, come on, you gotta celebrate too!”

“Okay, okay,” Minnie smiled then put her phone away. She could tell this was gonna be a great Pride month.

[jen-iii]

I finished coloring this for the Honor of Grayskull and also for canon gays ;A;

[alwaysgold03]

Rainbow capitalism, the exploitation of gays in media, and All for the Game: An Essay

TW: talk of regular aftg tws

THIS WILL GET TO AFTG I PROMISE YOU JUST GOTTA READ THE BACKGROUND FIRST.

The other day I was watching a new video by one of my favourite YouTubers (@/aretheygay) called “the end of rainbow capitalism”, where he was explaining from a sociological and capitalistic standpoint why a lot of queer people feel disillusioned from the queer media we’re given… and it got me thinking.

While yes, there are more queer characters in media these days, and there are more queer centred stories being told, 8.5/10 times (random number I made up don’t ask for sources) these pieces of media portray a VERY specific type of queer person, something that can be easily squeezed into a box and sold at the highest price, because, of course, everything comes down to capitalism in our world.

So, these movie/tv producers (most of the time, but this can also be seen in books) want to make queer characters that are gay enough for the gays, but can also cater to their straight viewers. Why?? To Maximize Profit.

So, This YouTuber gives us an explanation as to why we feel disillusioned: because these pieces of media were not made for queer people, they were made for queer CONSUMERS. They were made for money and, most of the time, nothing else. (CW: This is not for all pieces of queer media, this is a generalization).

This means that a very large portion of queer media is based around a white, cis guy who goes through the throes of coming out and homophobia in their community (normally high school) but oh my gosh they don’t deserve it!!… and then it eventually ends with unanimous acceptance or death.

Therefore, even though we are *technically* getting the queer media we all so desire and crave as most lgbt+ people do (because let’s be real, everyone wants to see themselves represented in media to feel more accepted), we are also being told we can’t complain about what we are given. We hear “oh my god, the gays whine so much, we literally gave them what they want”. But really, we weren’t. Not at all.

We are given these tiny crumbs of representation that only represent a chosen few that are easy to advertise to the masses, and also perpetuate a queer stereotype in a cishet society. Selling a “homosexual box” all tied up with a nice bow when, really, you cannot possibly fit all queer people into one category. That’s why so many queer people do not see themselves in the characters on tv.

Now you may ask, what does this homosexual box include?

- extremely washed out queer characters (diluting them like gingerale when you have the flu, of all controversies and “bad” qualities. The gays can be gay but not if they have sex or commit crimes like the cishets!)

- Mostly white, cis characters played by white, cis, het actors

- One single narrative of the “queer experience” being homophobia and exclusion.

What does this mean? Well, it means that these producers in the media are making millions of dollars catering to consumers, and by doing so, trying their hardest to make the queer characters the most unproblematic, “good” people they can, pushing a new stereotype in media. The “gay hero”.

I kinda came up with this term on my own (once again pls don’t source me) but it’s something I’ve always had a problem with. It’s the YA novels and teen tv shows/movies that star a cis white gay guy that never does wrong and gets praise for coming out and “telling his truth” and then THE END! (ex. Love Simon, which isn’t technically bad,,,, but. You know…) and really, for most queer viewers, this story is overused and boring. We end up reading the same characters over and over, craving some sort of representation we can see ourselves in, but just receive the same person with a new name that we end up forgetting everything about and never want to read or watch again.

I’m not saying stories about cis, white, strictly gay guys shouldn’t be told, because of course they deserve a place in media too, but come on. We need more than this box. We deserve more.

Because of this, in a lot of queer books, tv shows and movies, the queer character never does anything wrong, and perpetuates the ideology that queer people are different, something OTHER than human. Because it’s just a fact that humans make mistakes and do bad things. That’s what makes us HUMAN. That’s what makes us interesting and gives us DEPTH.

So here is where I start to think to myself. I am constantly looking for queer media to consume, as a queer person does, but I am also highly critical of it, and will not hesitate to shit on a badly written lgbt piece of media (to my friends only, because I don’t believe in open hate that the creators could see when my opinion could be subjective).

Of course, as my main genre to consume, I want these books and movies to be good, but more often than not, I am disappointed and give the book to thrift stores without a second thought. These books most often portray characters that have no depth, no individuality, no tension, and honestly, overall, are simply boring! This is mostly because they never did anything WRONG. They weren’t, in any way, bad people. They weren’t realistic! They were blank slates.

And so, I look at the lgbt media I like the most! Aristotle and Dante, Cemetery Boys, Banana Fish, Song of Achilles, Red White and Royal Blue, Carry On, (Nico Di Angelo and Piper McLean specifically from Percy Jackson), One Last Stop, Radio Silence, Portrait of a Lady on Fire, But I’m a Cheerleader, Doukyusei, Tamen de Gushi. These portray characters with complex background stories and embedded personal and generational traumas that influence their actions, be it good or bad. Some do things that are morally wrong or grey, they do what they have to for their own wellbeing, they have motivations and goals that go beyond “oh gosh my whole life revolves around coming out”. Because that is just not accurate.

All of the characters we know and love as our favourite queer characters (for me at least) make mistakes. They do bad things.

This is where All for the game comes in, aka my all time favourite series and hyper-fixation. I’ve been obsessed for YEARS and was unable to understand why I loved it so much. It has its faults, but it has held me hostage for this long, without any sign I’ll be let go in the near or far future.

As I was watching this video on YouTube, I had a “holy shit” moment. Because even in all those queer pieces of media I mentioned, all the characters are considered the heroes by the end of the books, they end up being the “good guys” all along, even if they might not always be the greatest or most morally sound.

But what, you may ask, ISN’T like that???

ALL FOR THE GAME.

I read All for the game a while ago. I have analyzed so much of the series you would think I’d be bored by now, but for some odd reason, I never am.

All for the game is probably the only series I have ever consumed where every leading character (the foxes) is so morally fucked up that there are MANY instances throughout the series where I thought to myself, “damn, I really should not condone this!” And that makes it the most interesting cast of all time.

And yes, I do fault Nora for many things she has done. In all honesty, she was terrible at researching with accuracy for everything concerning the mafia, sports, mental illness, the use of medication, and basically all of the series’ main themes and subjects, BUT. That woman truly produced the most realistic set of character flaws ever in the history of anything I have ever read or watched. Every fox is completely different, completely their own, represents a different type of person, and interesting in their own ways. That, and Nora completely DE-STERILIZED the gays. She de-sterilized them so hard she basically dipped them in the Thames!

This, in my very uneducated opinion, is why we all love all for the game with such an intense ferocity.

Nora Sakavic created characters with so much depth, that were so fucking realistic, that we can see them as real people, with real problems and traumas, with realistic reactions to those traumas. Truly, I have not met a queer or mentally ill person who hasn’t related to at LEAST one of the foxes.

Because, to reiterate, this series isn’t a series where the queer characters “come out” and it’s a massive plot point and they are praised for it. It’s a series with its own plot with queer characters existing within it. They are queer characters being queer and living their (dramatic) lives. Queers in the wild! That in itself is realistic representation. This, along with the fact that the queer characters in the series aren’t, in any definition, good people. They have killed people for fucks sake, and otherwise done, morally, VERY BAD THINGS. But that’s what makes them so interesting! That’s why we can analyze them over and over and find new things to delve into constantly.

Nora gave us exceptionally interesting characters, and queer characters on top of that! Even the characters that never became canon (cough Renison the best wlw couple to exist cough), most everyone in the fandom agrees that they are together! It is communal knowledge that that series is full of traumatized queer characters because of how they were written with in between the lines context, canon or not. And, even though this is how we interpret the media, it is not a “gay story”. It’s a thriller, a sports novel, a mystery in some ways, and, of course, a romance. This is where the difference between “a gay story” and “a story with queer characters” comes into play.

And, yes, maybe the series is horribly unrealistic, and over the top, and dramatic, and badly researched, but the queer representation is REAL. It showcases everything, canon or not (it’s canon to us Nora, piss off)!

We have Neil, the main character, who is canonically Demisexual, and could easily be interpreted as a trans guy due to his backstory. We have Andrew, who is gay, with a very realistic backstory of sexual assault from men in foster care. We have Renee, a born again Christian who CLEARLY a lesbian (rainbow hair? Come on.), Allison the comp-het bisexual, Matt and Dan the poc bisexual power couple, Nicky the conversion therapy survivor gay poc who found a better life in a different country with a found family (we support fanon Nicky not Nora’s Nicky where she pushed obvious stereotypes onto him), and Kevin Gay- I MEAN DAY- who is so obviously bisexual that he publicly drools over Jeremy and then tells Neil that it’s easier to be straight. How would you know Mr Day??

And these are just. Facts in the fandom. And it’s all normal. There is no “holy shit, you’re gay?” *homophobia arc* moment when Andrew and Neil are sort of confirmed to be together. There is really no coming out moment for ANYONE, because it doesn’t matter! They just are!

And they aren’t made out to be these heroes who can’t do wrong! Because they are all royally messed up individuals who have made mistakes and went through shit and came out alive!

MORAL OF THE ESSAY: queer people can be morally skewed and still deserve love! Bad people can be bad and also be gay and still get the happy ending! YOU CAN BE A “BAD PERSON” AND STILL MAKE/FIND A FAMILY WHO LOVES YOU. YOU CAN GET A HAPPY ENDING DESPITE YOUR WRONG DOINGS OR TRAUMAS!!!!!

(I am not equating having trauma to being a bad person btw, I’m just saying that separately, most of the foxes have trauma, but they have also done bad things, and either way, with both, either or none, they deserve love.)

That, I think, is the key to why I love All for the game so much, as someone who is severely mentally ill and severely queer. We were given a story where the main characters are queer and mentally ill and traumatized and do bad things, but still get a good ending. We’re shown that what you do in your past, or what happened to you in your past, doesn’t define you. We’re shown REALISTIC, MESSY, IMMORAL QUEERS THAT DON’T FIT THE RAINBOW CAPITALIST BOX. We are given something we can see ourselves in. No matter her wrongdoings, I will always love Nora for that.

Anyways. I love all for the game. I think I always will. I hope you guys agree :)

[thefoxholestuff]

Ok ok ok so. Idea (may or may not be based off recent events go check out my main @mknevershutsup if you‘re curious).

Y‘all know that Queer Person Thing where you see someone wearing pride merch in public and you’re like !!! fellow gay??? O shit they’re kinda cute I should let them know somehow that I am also a Fellow Gay!! But how?? I shall compliment the pride thing!!!

…but how?

Ya know that feeling?

I present to you: Neil works at a coffee shop. Andrew is a regular. Neil is just figuring out his identity and wears a lot of rainbow stuff to work (pins, beanies, etc) because his friends gave him stuff after he came out (he doesn’t quite know what he is yet but he sure as hell ain’t straight) and he likes it, it makes him feel like he belongs somewhere. Cue Andrew awkwardly trying to communicate to Neil that he’s into men and specifically into Neil by aggressively complimenting whatever rainbow thing he’s wearing that day.

Neil just. Cannot figure out what the hell is going on. He figures at first that Andrew is just a really overenthusiastic ally and kinda goes ‘well he’s a little confused but he’s got the spirit, good for him I guess?’ But the compliments get steadily more persistent and obvious and accompanied by ever more furious flushing on the tips of Andrew’s ears (because Neil’s coworker and best friend Matt pulls Andrew aside when he starts getting worried about whether he’s made Neil uncomfortable and goes ‘look buddy idk if he’s into you or not. He doesn’t know either. He hasn’t considered it because he is not picking up what you are putting down. You gotta be more obvious). And Neil kind of starts to think Andrew is making fun of him and starts getting kinda snappy back, which backfires because we all know how Andrew feels about Neil’s smart mouth.

Renee, Dan, and Allison have to hold an intervention before the situation can escalate. Neil needs it explained to his face, with exasperated testimonials from Aaron and Nicky. Kevin frogmarches Andrew into the coffee shop the next day and sends him up to the counter (this is only allowed because Andrew doesn’t actually know yet about the intervention and hey, he doesn’t really want Kevin interrupting his attempts to talk to Neil anyway).

Neil smirks at him, nods towards the rainbow sticker Renee snuck onto his sleeve (because y’all know Renee is the only one who can sneak up on Andrew), and says “I like your sticker. Wanna go out sometime?”

Andrew stands there blinking for a full 3 seconds.

When he says yes, half the coffee shop shouts at him that he would have saved them all a lot of trouble if he had said the exact same thing a month and a half ago.

[dazaisfavoritewife]

Bnha as siblings

They figure out your crush pt.2

Heyooo so uhm, same deal againnn homophobia is being blocked✨

Female

Ochaco Uraraka sister

“Deku?” You whispered, causing him to jump out of his skin. “You scared me Uraraka-San..” he mumbled, trying to calm his racing heart. “Sorry.. I just need to talk to you.” You said, rubbing the back of your head. “What’s up?” He asked, coming completely around the corner. “I came to ask some questions about Todoroki-kun.” You said, crossing your arms and flushing slightly. “Okay.. What do you want to know?” He asked, as you leaned on the wall. “What’s his favorite place to go..? Y’know, for soba..? Cold..?” You asked, fidgeting slightly. “I don’t really think he cares, he just likes Soba in general.” He replied, then began rambling. “Midoriya, Iida is still waiting for us to meet him for- oh, hello Uraraka.” He said, smiling slightly at you. You blushed, hiding your face. “Hi Todoroki! Bye Todoroki!” You said, leaving quickly. Todoroki frowned. “Does she not like me..?” He muttered to Deku, looking quite disheartened. Deku looked like he just found out the meaning of life, nodding. “Oh..” Todoroki whispered, making Midoriya start to panic. “No! That’s not what I mean, I just- uh- no, she likes you!” He sputtered, waving his arms around.

“Jeez, I messed up..” you whispered to yourself, walking up to Ochaco. “Hey Y/n! What’s wrong..?” She asked, noticing how flustered you looked. “I’m just gonna tell it to ya straight.. I like Todoroki..” you said, crossing your arms. “I know.” She said, walking with you out of the gate. “You made it pretty obvious.” She said, causing you to nod. “You’re pretty obvious about liking Deku.” You said, uncrossing your arms. “I-I’ve got no idea what you’re talking about..” she stuttered, flushing. “Yeah, everyone knows, even Eri knows, Deku’s oblivious.” You said, smiling slightly.

Mina Ashido brother

“Ice cream!” “Ice cream!” You and your sister chanted, following Bakugou around the dorm. “OH MY GOD SHUT UP!” Bakugou yelled, creating explosions in his hands and turning around to glare at you two. Glancing at each other, you both deadpanned. “No” You said at the same time. “NO!? THE HELL YOU MEAN NO!!” He yelled, before Jirou and Uraraka walked into the room. “The class wanted to know if you guys wanted to play truth or dare with us!” Uraraka excitedly cheered, causing Mina to gasp, clapping her hands and grabbing Jirou and Uraraka’s. “Why didn’t you tell me in the first place!” She whined, their voices fading as they walked away. “So uhm..” you mumbled, shuffling nervously. “You wanna play?” You asked, turning towards him. He shrugged, dragging you by your collar towards the common room. “I’ll take that as a yes-!” You got cut off by him jerking your collar, causing you to whine slightly.

After a few lame truths and dares, it was your turn. “Y/n! Truth or dare?” Mina asked, which made you smirk and sigh in relief. “Finally! Alright, dare!” You said, excitement beyond belief from the boring dares everyone else had to do. “I dare you to…” she started, pausing to think. “Kiss your crush!” She finished, pointing at you. “What are we in, kindergarten?!” Bakugou shouted, growing a tick mark. You shrugged. “Dare’s a dare” you said, tugging Bakugou into a kiss. Everyone gasped, as you felt Bakugou’s racing heart under your hand. You pulled away, panting slightly. “God damn!” Mina exclaimed, throwing her hands in the air. “Who would’ve thot!!” She exclaimed again, the rest of the class looking just as shocked. You sat back down, as Bakugou looked awestruck. “Is it m-“ Bakugou snatched you into another kiss, looking slightly irritated. The kiss was hungry, like this wasn’t a ‘game’ anymore. “You can’t just slip that past me, dumbass..” he growled, as you chuckled nervously. “I’m in danger!” You said, Bakugou swinging you over his shoulder. “Get it bro! Use protection!” Your sister said, waving, as did everyone else while laughing hysterically.

Tsuyu Asui sister

“Tsu!” You exclaimed, opening your bedroom door. She’d just come home from the training camp, and you, along with your brother and sister, were ecstatic. “C’mon Satsuki, you’re too slow..!” You complained, dragging both of them with you. She whined, going faster than before. You dragged them down the stairs and to the living room where your dad was prodding at her, mostly on why she was hurt. You all ambushed her with hugs, saying how much you missed her. “I missed you too! Kero” she snickered, smiling brightly. (She already knows your crush so have this🐥)

Kyoka Jirou brother

You were taking a walk while listening to the after school E.P, currently on test me…

👀 anyways, you weren’t paying attention since you were too into humming the tune instead of what the goal at hand was, which was keeping your feet moving in a safe manner and avoiding obstacles. “So I beg to be tested by goddesses resting their heads upon pillows..” you quietly sang, bobbing your head slightly. “Of all they have learned ‘Cause I’m mortal..” you finished, a skip in your step. “I like that song..” you heard faintly, before jolting, turning around to deck them square in the face. “Oh! Shit- sorry Midoriya..!” You exclaimed, as he held his nose. “It’s okay..” he hissed, you taking his hand away, causing him to flinch. “Sorry.. Sorry..” you repeated, wiping his nose on your sleeve. He chuckled nervously. “It’s fine, I shouldn’t have spoken so randomly.” He said, grinning at you. “You’re right.. I should’ve went for the pepper spray.” You mumbled, nodding. “P-pepper spray..?” He stuttered, as you shrugged. “Dad wants me to be protected since he says there weirdos out here, also the attacks on 1-A.” You explained, opening your bag with all of your protective gear. “I see…” he mumbled, jumping when you abruptly slammed it shut. “Can I buy you some Katsudon? Courtesy for fuckin up your nose.” You offered, already beginning to walk again. “I-I can’t let you pay-“ He started, before you cut him off. “I said I would, so I am. You said, as he sighed, walking behind you.

“You owe me” Denki whispered. Jirou scoffed, handing him 2,213 Yen(basically 20 dollars). “Thank youuu..” he muttered, smirking triumphantly. “Just c’mon, we gotta keep up if we’re gonna spy” Kyoka said, sneaking behind you two.

Momo Yaoyorozu brother

Katsuki Bakugou🕺 gotta love this man bro, he already knew your sexuality cause he’s gay asf, so, gay + gay = you’re dating bae😚 Mk , you aren’t necessarily dating.. But you love each other, and the girls know it so.. Yeah. That.

Nemuri Kayama brother

“Hey! Kayama!” Akari called, grabbing your hand. “What’s up, Tsukumo-senpai?” You asked, turning around to greet him. “Meet my friend, Asui Samidare.” He introduced, gesturing to a shy boy with dark green hair. “Hi Asui-San! It’s nice to meet you, I’m Y/N Kayama.” You said, reaching your hand out for a handshake. He shook your hand. “Nice to meet you too.. Kero” he mumbled, causing you to smile at him reassuringly. “Are you the nice girl’s little brother?” You asked, beginning to walk. “Tsu?” He asked, glancing at you. “Yeah-huh. She’s my sisters student.” You replied, nodding. You guys began talking about kindergarten ‘drama’. After a few minutes, the bell rang, which startled you slightly. You giggled, getting up, and walking back to your classrooms to get ready to go home. “Hey, Kayama, my dad wanted me to ask if I can come over after school.” Akari said, walking over to you. You flushed, hiding your face in your backpack, grabbing your stuffy. “I-I don’t think Nemuri would m-mind..” you stuttered, as he smiled brightly at you. “Thanks, Y/n! I think I should still ask your sister though.” He said, grabbing his own backpack. “C’mon Asui-San, let’s go..” you muttered, walking out the door behind Akari. Once you got outside, Asui and his sisters immediately advanced towards their older sister who was waiting outside of the school. He waved at you two, before disappearing behind the corner. “Y/n!” Your sister called, and beckoned you over. You grabbed Akari’s hand, walking towards your sister. “Nemuri-nee, Akari’s dad was wondering if he could come home with me after school.” You said, grabbing her hand. “I don’t mind, ‘long as he doesn’t make a mess.” She said, shrugging. “I told you” you said, as he stuck his tongue out at you. You returned the gesture, your sister snickering, as you finally got to the car.

Himiko Toga brother

“Himikooo~! Let’s go get you some more blood!” You cheered, as she popped from behind the wall. “God damn it.. Two crazies today of all days..?” Dabi groaned, gulping down his whiskey. “Sorry honey, you’re gonna have to sit this one out.” You said, sitting on the counter next to him. “Can I have a hug?” You asked, as he sighed. He opened his arms, you going in for the hug. You stuck your needle in his arm to take some blood. “God dammit!” He hissed, as you began laughing hysterically along with your sister. “I still love you!” You exclaimed, rushing out the door with your sister. (These are kinda shorter since they already know your crush soo..)

Rumi Usagiyama brother

“Rumi-nee?” You called, creaking the door open slightly. “Hm?” She hummed, peaking out of her closet. “Wait what are you doing?” You asked, running towards her. “Hey! No running in the house, you know the rules..” she said, fading as she went back into her closet. “I’m taking the stuff I think my girlfriend would like.” She said, throwing a few shirts and dresses on the bed. “Can I help?” You asked, jumping onto her bed.. Quite literally. “Sure. What do you think would look better on me?” She asked, sitting next to you. “I don’t know, you’re always pretty.” “Awww~ cotton tail!” “Except for when you’re waking up in the morning. You’re scary” you mumbled, as she deadpanned. “Just.. Tell me what I should wear..” she grumbled, walking to the bathroom. You dug through the things she threw on the bed, and found a white dress. “I found it Rumi!” You exclaimed, running into the bathroom. “Ooo that’s nice, cotton tail!” She complimented, taking the dress and hanging it up on the door. “Full makeup or no?” She asked, obviously grabbing mascara. “Nuh uh, you’re already pretty.” You said, jumping onto the counter and swinging your legs. “Thanks buddy.. Alright, hair straight or curled?” She asked, grabbing a curling iron. You shook your head, and she nodded, taking a quick shower and doing her makeup. “Oki doki, hawks is gonna be here soon, so behave, Kay?” She said, finishing her lipstick. You nodded, hopping off the counter, and heading to your room. “Hey, fancy pants! Get all spruced up for me?” You heard hawks faintly down the hall. “AH SHIT- why didn’t you just knock on the door!” She asked, as you heard hawks hiss, whimpering slightly. “Owww ow ow..” he whined, as you heard them walking closer to your room. “Y/n is in there, sorry for punching you..” she muttered. “It’s okay, I should’ve knocked..” he mumbled, sounding slightly nasally. You assumed she was pinching his nose like when you got nose bleeds. You silently hopped off the bed, opening your door. “Are you okay?” You asked, hawks screeching slightly as some feathers flew off. “He’s okay, Y/n. He’s just got a nose bleed” she said, going into the bathroom to get some toilet paper. “Pinch your nose until it stops bleeding, now I gotta go, bye, love you!” She rushed, grabbing a jacket and her keys. “Bye, love you!” You yelled back, rushing down the stairs to give her a quick hug. “Bye Hawks!” She said, closing the door. You stared at it for a while, before hopping onto the couch. “Excuse me, do you want to watch My Little Pony with me? You asked, as hawks came down the stares. He nodded, you clicking on YouTube. He tilted his head since he knew you had Netflix, but shrugged, sitting down next to you. “Can you type in pinkie pie cupcakes?” You asked, smiling innocently at him. He nodded, grinning at you, before grabbing the remote and typing it in. You clicked the first video you saw, waiting for it to start. “Why does it sound so ominous..?” He asked, looking slightly unnerved. “Don’t worry, it’s funny.” You said, smiling reassuringly at him.

“Hey Cottontail! How was your day?” Rumi asked, walking through the door, to you playing with pinkie pie. “It was good! Hawks watched My Little Pony with me.” You said, as Hawks peaked from upstairs. “Thank GOD you’re home! This kid is terrifying..!” He cried, trying to avoid you in every way possible. “Uh- I didn’t pay you yet..?” “I don’t care! Bye!!” He yelled, slamming the door. “What happened?” She asked, turning to you. You shrugged, picking up your rainbow dash pony up the stairs. “Hawks got scared of the dragon I think.” You lied, throwing rainbow dash down the stairs. She shrugged, going to sit on the stairs with you. “I like Hawks, he’s cool.” You said, flushing slightly. “Gosh darn it.. Are you adding to your husband’s list..?” She whined, sighing soon after, and kicking off her heels. She groaned in relief. “Jesus those things are death traps..!” She complained, as you shrugged. “I like playing with heels.” You said, getting up to put your toys away. “Well, be careful next time you do, they’re slippery sometimes.” She said, getting up and grabbing her heels, taking them to her room and kicking the door closed.

Nejire Hado brother

I mean.. You said who you liked when you came out so.. Don’t know what to do🤷🏾‍♀️

Emi Fukukado brother

“I mean.. Why Erasure? He’s mine!” Emi whined, hanging upside down off the bed. “Because he has a fat ass.” You shrugged, flicking her feet off the bed. “That’s true.. But that hurt!” She whined, rubbing her head. “Get out of my room, Emi” you scoffed, as she shot up. “I don’t wannaaa! I’m not done ranting!” She whined, jumping back on your bed. “Go rant over text..” you mumbled. “But you’re my only brother! And aren’t you supposed to be doing homework anyways?” She accused, leaning on her hand. “Y’know, from a teacher’s standpoint, homework is honestly pointless.” She shrugged, as you nodded. “Right, we already did it at school, lay us some slack..” you mumbled, her finally standing up fully. “Alrighty, I’m off to rant over text as you told me. See ya!” She exclaimed, slamming your door. You shrugged, laying back down to text Shindo.

[nerdygaymormon]

Where do you see the church in like, ten years ish? Just for funsies, don’t have to answer

I gotta tell ya, 10 years in the church isn’t that long, it moves pretty slow. I think it’d be easier to say predictions for 50 years or 100 years because that’s a long enough time frame that real change can occur, 

But sticking with the 10-year timeline, I have some ideas

At least one more apostle from Latin America and one from Africa will be called

The move to include women will continue. This might be done in having the Relief Society presidency attend bishopric meetings or sit on the stand during Sacrament Mtg. Letting young women pass the Sacrament. Sister Training Leaders having more authority and the Mission President’s Wife getting an official title to show she is called to work alongside her husband. But the church will stop short of saying women can hold the priesthood.

I think the pandemic has proved how ineffective the old style of missionary work was. They’ll continue to mostly reach out to others online, and their other time will be spent doing community service.

Music will be loosened up. We’ll have new hymnals & songbooks that include a more diverse collection of songs. Instruments beyond the organ & piano will be welcomed, more than just a violin or flute.

I think those are the easy ones, but there’s several serious issues the church needs to tackle. I imagine we’ll make some slow progress on them.

1) I think we’ll see rainbow flags outside temple square for General Conferences and general membership embracing queer people, and the leadership having to address queer topics whenever they allow questions to be asked at meetings/firesides. This pressure will continue the gradual, though grudging, progress forward.       a) It’ll be okay for trans people to “socially transition” by wearing whatever clothes they want at church, using their chosen name & their pronouns with no penalty.       b) No prohibition of queer people showing affection like holding hands      c) There’ll be some sort of guidebook for bishops to help them know how to talk to a youth who has come out      d) Whenever BYU teams travel to play other universities, there’ll be vocal support of queer rights and shaming of the church’s refusal to fully welcome & embrace queer people      e) A queer club on BYU campuses will be allowed, but under strict supervision      f) Some gay dating will be done openly at the BYU schools. BYU doesn’t enforce rules against it but expects bishops to do so, and some bishops will try to stamp it out and others will be relaxed about it, thus making an ambiguous climate      g) The temple recommend questions will change again because too many people are disqualified by their support for LGBTQ+ people  

2) I think the support of church members for Donald Trump surprised and worries leaders. They’ll speak more forcefully about reliable sources of information, against conspiracy theories, and Republican positions will be less privileged than they have been and more positions that are more comfortable to Democrats will be mentioned by leaders as an attempt to pull us out of the morass of the right-wing conspiracy world  

3) Maybe within the next 10 years we might get a General Conference talk from someone who has some doubts, who has gone through a faith crisis. People who haven’t gone through those things, or at least can’t openly speak of such, they have a hard time speaking in a way that connects with people experiencing doubt and a shift in their faith. 

4) Sadly I don’t see race being addressed over the next 10 years. The church seems to feel there’s nothing more it needs to do for Black members. I predict the partnership with the NAACP will occasionally be spoken of by our leaders while the NAACP leaders will say it’s over and are surprised we still talk about it, that they found us an unwilling partner  

5) More home-study type programs will be created, and this will serve to create 2 tiers of members. Those who regularly do Come, Follow Me and other home study will be privileged, those who don’t will increasingly miss the insider references and won’t feel so connected to the community

Derek Knox likes to say that the things which are right about the church can fix the things that are wrong with it. I believe that, but will we let that happen?

On sensitive topics, our church doesn’t lead, instead it waits until the pain of not changing exceeds the pain involved in making change. 

[writethelifeyouwant]

Dive Bar Ch. 7/ ?

Pairing: Dean x Sam (eventually, he he he) 

Rating: 18+

Prompt/Summary: After a one night stand with a random college chick turns into a threesome that also featured his little brother, Dean- well, frankly, he panics. What’s even worse than gay panicking? Gay incest panicking. Luckily, Sam winds up being a little more cool about the whole thing than Dean ever would have imagined. 

WC: 2,276

Tags: gay panic, allusions to brother/brother incest, angst, Dean having graphic naughty thoughts 

Beta:  @daydream3r-xo - thank you for reading lovely 😘

A/N: To keep things realistic, as this chapter takes place one month on from the previous one, I figured I better make you guys wait that long too! JK, 🙃 I just suck spectacularly. So sorry for the unplanned hiatus, but I’m getting back into the swing of things, and promise the next chapter is already in progress and will be out next week 😊

Chapter 6

*

One month later

They’re out west working a vengeful spirit case and pretending, pretty effectively Dean thinks, that the events of nearly two months ago now have been forgotten. Sam doesn’t bring it up, he doesn’t bring it up, that should be the end of that. Except it’s not. Inside, Dean’s head is a mass of tangled emotions and twisted thoughts and dark crevices broadcasting a siren’s song - like the allure of hearing a snippet of “Cherry Pie” seeping out into the dusty blackness of a desert parking lot illuminated by the warm neon outlines of poles and women - except the images hidden in those crevices aren’t mostly-naked women with too much makeup and not enough self respect. Hidden in the recesses of Dean’s mind are the images of Sam’s cock thrusting into a tight throat, and an echo of the words, “hey, if you ever need help figuring it out…”

Those words have haunted Dean more thoroughly than any ghost they’ve hunted, than any spectre they’ve burned. And Dean couldn’t manage to burn those words out of his memory. 

A knock on his shoulder draws Dean out of himself and back to the present, where the object of his fantasies sits blissfully unaware on the sticky black leather next to him. The desert is hot. 

“Are you listening to me man? Thought you said we were gonna pull over for the night, find some A/C?”

“Yeah, of -” Dean cleared his throat, dropping from the embarrassingly high octave his voice had come out in. “Of course, just uh, point me to the next exit I guess. There’s gotta be something coming up.” 

“Yeah, it looks like there’s a little resort town coming up just a coupl’a miles from here. If it’s a tourist spot they should at least have functioning air conditioning, maybe even a shower that isn’t broken,” Sam huffed. 

“Yeah, sounds good Sammy.”

*

To Sam’s relief they had a cool room and a clean shower about half an hour later, and he relished in the chance to stretch his legs and rinse off the dust that clung to him from driving with the windows down most of their way there. Towelling off his hair with a rough shake he lobbed the towel onto the bed and grabbed for a fresh t-shirt. 

“I’m going to grab some grub. You want to come or you gonna stay and read that nerd book you picked up in the last town?” 

“You mean Mythology of the Spirit in the American West?” Sam corrected Dean exasperatedly. 

“Yeah, like I said, nerd book. You coming with or not?” 

Sam huffed and considered his options. He was looking forward to sitting down with that book, but he’d also been cooped up in the impala for innumerable hours not too long ago, and it would feel good to walk around for a bit, even if his brother was being an ass. 

“Yeah, sure. I’m coming.” 

*

Dean picked out the first joint they walked by with bright lights and loud music. This was definitely a tourist town, because even on a weekday this place was packed, but Dean liked the noise and the buzz. It made a welcome change from the monotony of his thoughts broadcasting over a tinny radio all day. 

The place didn’t have much in the way of decor beyond the theme of ‘bar’. It was crowded with mostly guys - dressed a little more loudly than Dean would have expected but, hey, they were probably on vacation, cutting a little loose - and the occasional group of girlfriends had tables dotted around as well. It looked like your typical food and drink establishment. 

Sam slapped him on the arm and gestured to a free table on the other side of the room. Dean gave him a thumbs up and pointed to the bar, to indicate he’d grab the first round of drinks and hopefully find a menu while he was at it, he was starving. 

The bartender gave him a friendly smile when he asked for two draughts and pointed out the menus when Dean asked. Dean grabbed the first beer that was passed over to him and hung around at the bar while he looked through the menu and waited for Sam’s drink. That turned out to be a poor tactical decision, because standing alone at a bar and being as attractive as Dean is a combination that invited attention. 

“Hey, how’s it going?” 

Dean looked up, startled, into the face of the tanned, polo-shirt-wearing guy that had just spoken to him. He was giving Dean what was supposed to be an open, disarming smile, but which really just looked weirdly nervous. 

“Uh, hey,” Dean responded, leaving it open for the newcomer to pick up the conversation, but not really knowing what to say to him. 

“Nice night, huh?” 

“Um, yeah, sure-”

“Here’s your other drink, man,” the bartender cut across the exchange and dropped the second glass next to Dean’s first. 

“Thanks,” Dean grabbed quickly for the second drink and tucked the menu under his arm before grabbing his own. “Uh, nice to meet ‘ya,” he nodded awkwardly to polo-guy and hurried past to get back to Sam, who was playing on his phone at the table, leaving any thought of how weird that was back at the bar with the now deflated looking tourist. 

An hour later, suitably fed and two beers down, Sam suggested a game of pool. 

“You know I’m always up for beating your ass, Sammy.” 

Dean grinned and racked up the strangely coloured billiard balls in a bright pink frame. He’d never seen rainbow-coloured pool before but, whatever, people were weird. He gave Sam the break, and tried very hard to look anywhere but his baby brother’s ass as he bent stoically over the felt top and crashed the cue into the white ball, grinning smugly when he straightened up and rounded the table to pound a brightly striped ball into a corner pocket. Dean breathed a sigh of relief that he no longer had to avoid looking at Sam with his perv-o-vision on, but realised too late that the front-on view of Sam wasn’t any less enticing. 

The way his chestnut bangs curled over his brow and caught on his insanely long eyelashes - seriously was he wearing mascara or something? Dean yanked himself from his thoughts, only to be confronted with Sam’s eyes glancing up at him from behind those lashes and curls, like he wanted to check Dean was watching him while he took his shot. He holed another ball, and the clack and thunk of ball against porcelain and then wood shuddered through Dean and settled in his bones. The cocky smirk on Sam’s face took it one step further, and sent a shock of arousal through his chest and down. 

“I’m gonna go get us some refills,” Dean grunted and motioned to their mostly empty glasses. Sam shrugged and eyed his next shot, smirking to himself, under the assumption that Dean was bailing because he didn’t want to watch Sam slaughter him right out of the gate. He was partially right. At the rate he was going, Dean was going to be on the floor soon; and it had nothing to do with the pool or the alcohol, and everything to do with the thoughts Sam was stirring inside him. 

Up at the bar, Dean called for two more beers, and a double shot of something strong. The amber liquid was dropped in front of him quickly while the bartender waited for the taps to clear. Dean took a healthy gulp and let the burn in his throat ground him, reminding him of what he could control in this world. And maybe he couldn’t control his thoughts about Sammy, but he could control how mind-numbingly drunk he got to forget them. Taking the second and last gulp of the liquor, he nearly choked when he felt a tap on his shoulder. And he knew it wasn’t Sam, because he was watching Sam still bent over the pool table from across the room. 

“You drank that pretty damn quick,” the stranger chuckled deeply. “Good stuff?” 

“Strong stuff,” Dean grunted, and flagged the bartender for another, which was quickly poured out for him. 

“I know something else pretty strong that would feel good sliding down your throat.” This time Dean did choke on his liquor, prompting the stranger to thump him on the back, which Dean flinched away from violently. “Sorry hombre, didn’t mean to scare you like that,” the stranger had the decency to look slightly abashed, “it’s just… you got the best damn blowjob lips I’ve ever seen.” Dean almost swallowed wrong again. 

“I, uh…” Dean cleared his throat, grasping at straws for words that made any sense, and tried again. “That’s, um, that’s very flattering of you but I’m not… uh, ‘on your team’ amigo, sorry.” In a bid to hide his awkwardness, Dean went to down the rest of his drink. It stung on the way down, where the flesh of his throat was raw from choking. 

“Oh, sorry man, I thought uh- with your friend over there you two must be… well, among friends here.” He gestured vaguely around the room and Dean followed his motion, paying closer attention now than he had all night. And that’s when he noticed that a lot of the guys were sitting just a little closer than friends do, the groups of girlfriends dotted around all had pairs amongst them… His eyes darted back to Sam and the rainbow coloured billiard balls he hadn’t thought too hard about before. 

Dean’s stare hardened when he noticed that Sam, who had pocketed all his balls, effectively finishing the game while Dean was at the bar (and Dean did not let his heart strings tug proudly at that), was leaning casually against the side of the table, arms resting on his pool cue in a way that made him look carelessly sexy, eyes raking over a guy slightly shorter than him with spiky hair and a tight henley. His brain echoed with the sounds of shattering glass as he turned, wide-eyed, back to the incredibly forward man who had been hitting on him. 

“This is a gay bar?” Dean hoped he didn’t sound offensive, he was just confused. 

“Wow,” the stranger laughed, tucking a hand into his pocket, “you really are straight aren’t you?” 

He shook his head bemusedly and slapped a bill on the counter, gesturing for two of what Dean had just been downing. When they arrived, he clicked his drink against the glass he pushed in front of Dean. “Hope you forget whoever it is you’re drinking to forget about, and if you want some help with that, I don’t mind working with beginners.” The stranger left with a wink and made his way back to his group of buddies across the room, laughing off their sympathies at his strike out. 

Dean was left at the bar, puzzled, embarrassed, but vaguely flattered. Except then he remembered Sam was talking to someone, some jag-off who didn’t know how to buy clothes that fit him properly, and a feeling he wasn’t sure how to name writhed and burned in his chest. Eyeing his little brother over the drink he’d just been bought, Dean tried to do a little introspection for once. If he didn’t have a name for what he was feeling, then it was probably something new, right? It wasn’t his protective instincts kicking in, Sam could take this guy easily; could probably split him in half, Dean thought to himself ruefully. But then that thought conjured up an image Dean wasn’t mentally prepared for. 

Like he was watching it through the flickering of a candle, shadows jumping across the figures he was trying to focus on, Dean saw Sam grab the man’s hair and slam him over the pool table with his arm twisted behind his back, saw Sam pull down his too-skinny jeans and bury his face between the guy’s ass cheeks, saw Sam naked, slamming into him, splitting him in half, the muscles in his back flexing and glistening with sweat in the weird half light Dean was watching through. 

In a blink, Sam and his boy-toy had disappeared. Not just from Dean’s lecherous imaginings but also from Dean’s actual view. Panicked, he searched for Sam in the crowd, breath easing when he saw him further down the bar ordering drinks, but every muscle in his body clenched when he saw Sam’s hand land on his companion’s shoulder and squeeze. 

What the hell did Sam think he was doing? Picking some random guy up in a bar? That wasn’t like him at all, that was Dean’s thing. Except, when was the last time he’d gone home with someone? A few weeks? A month? With a gut-wrenching feeling, Dean realised that he hadn’t taken anyone home with him since Dani and Sam. So maybe picking people up in bars wasn’t his thing, if he hadn’t done it in so long. Maybe now it was Sam’s thing. 

But then what’s my thing? 

Dean scrambled in his head for a new identity, a new label. Something like ‘big brother’ that he could use to define himself, ground himself in the haze of confusion he felt himself slipping away in. Hunter? High-school dropout? Badass? Border-line alcoholic? He looked up from his empty glass and cast around his surroundings, frustrated and dazed and searching for an answer - and he locked eyes with Sam. 

You’re the guy who’s hopelessly in love with his little brother. 

Fuck.

***

Tags: @hawkerz12 @negans-lucille-tblr @dylansbabygirl24 @mineshinamary @popsensationnicole23 @spn-problems @donthateme454 @doyouknowsamw @peridottea91 @delightfulbakeryaliendeputy @fictionallemons @petitgateau911 @natastic @marvelfansworld @delightfullykrispypeach @half-closeted-bi-girl @akshi8278 @lyarr24 @crashlyrose @kiss-my-peachy-arse @tftumblin @j-ai-adore-dean @deandreamernp @miufel @alice101macwil @caitlinvd @disneysloot @itsthedoctah10 @devilsbby @leftlokiofpuppy @jackandthesoulmates​

[lavenderek]

this is gonna be "queer discourse" feel free to skip

look as a disclaimer, i don't usually participate in this conversation because it's exhausting and it literally never goes anywhere? all that happens is one side writes feature length symposia on queer history and the other side feels talked down to and attacked and refuses to read it and both sides just start ignoring each other's arguments and they get further entrenched in their own perspective and nobody learns anything or bridges any gaps. im just becoming an old crone like that was too loud, i share characteristics with the hag

but we keep having power outages over here and it's disrupting my work and making me cranky so buckle up because betps coming to town

it's just that i didn't really enjoy this persons argument* because the entire point of an umbrella term is not having to give detailed disclosures of your identity lmao. like the whole purpose is for everyone to be included without having to prove themselves. including and especially you! op says they know they're gatekeeping so like at least they're self aware lmao

but i don't actually have to show you my fukken gay diagnosis papers to prove to you i'm not just a "cishet who's a little quirky" lmfao what're you a cop? mind your business shgdikfs

nobody is claiming queer has never been a slur. where has anyone ever claimed that. if you manage to muscle your way through those long ass speeches pro queer people write they all pretty explicitly lay out the history of the term. over and over again. from different users. because they're all pretty convinced y'all don't know about it. i assumed you did and they were preaching to the choir.

long story short it's been used to refer to the community for generations, it's also been used as a slur for just as long, and it's your personal choice whether or not you identify with it but you can't take it away from me.

also hey you know what while we're here on my blog i might as well put my shit out there, i don't actually care that queer studies are called queer studies in academia and i don't care if straight people refer to the queer community. once they start saying "queers" or using it as an insult they're over the line. homophobes who make fun of lgbtq for being too long can leave but it is unwieldy to say verbally and no i don't care if you think that's a shitty comment to make. i think the only reason lgbtq hasn't become a slur people have yelled at them is because it's so unnatural to say out loud lmfao okay wait actually that's actually kind of a power move. like when prince started identifying as a symbol and a ton of places had to install new software to be able to write about him

also it's my opinion that microlabels are actively detrimental to identity and community. it starts being about specifically designating an identity that includes an extremely small amount of people so that you can shrink the definition to remove people you don't agree with 🤖 the rainbow flag was never intended to be specific to gay men, it was always supposed to be for the entire community. i think finding pride and acceptance in your own identity is gold and diamonds but i don't think it's helpful to designate yourself a myers briggs score of what type of queer you are and why bi people are different at the expense of connecting with the community as a whole.

like what's the barrier here, is it the terfs? do you not want to be queer because there's terfs? terfs are no more welcome in the queer community than racists are, like help us clean up our community we all live here. sorry! we're family! maybe you don't want to be family with me but you gotta! as soon as i decided to be gay it stopped being optional please grieve and move on

idk i think you should extend your f*g argument to the other side of the conversation. im sensing some strawman bias over there. seems like you're super frustrated and that's heavily informing your perspective on the topic. but nobody asked me! probably because i'm just a fake queer who's actually just a quirky cishet. oh fuck that's why you don't want to be under an umbrella with me. welp 🤷‍♀️

tldr i'm queer and bisexual, sorry to disappoint anyone who is just now finding this out about me! if you unfollow please don't let me know about it! please also don't reblog this!

smell ya later!

*please don't contact this person if you disagree with them lmfao leave them tf alone they're allowed to say what they want on their own blog

[residentlesbrarian]

The Second Book I Read In the Dark: Another YA superhero novel for me to squeal over forever...YES, Please! Gimme Gimme!

Dreadnought by April Daniels

So Day 1 in the dark continues onward and I have already finished 1 of my 3 library books with still so much day left so what else to do but soldier forward and continue without pause. Well there was a short pause for delicious chicken soup cooked on a blessedly gas powered range (never gonna live in a house with an electric range; I swear this thing has saved our butts in so many power outages), but I digress; I was ready! This time I was taking a break from the whimsical and witchy and diving head first into all things super with an extra heroic twist. 

I had heard so many good things about this book for so long but again it had fallen to the wayside of other distractions (a rainbow montage of movie and TV show gays runs back and forth through my head like the migrating fandom flamingoes). What finally made me make the decision to buckle down and do the thing was a video review done by one of my favorite YouTubers, Dominic Noble (Video Linked below). I love his series Lost in Adaptation, because as an avid reader I too find myself appalled by what Hollywood often does to my favorite books. Hearing him talk about Dreadnought was just the push my flighty brain needed to say, “Fine! Alright! We haven’t utterly obsessed over a teenage superhero book in like 6 months since we near bludgeoned our girlfriend with Not Your Sidekick! Fine! Let’s do it!” So...yeah if this intro is anything to go by this should be a fun one! Let’s dive right in shall we!

Unicorn Rating:

Blurb: She just wanted to paint her toenails in peace but then a superhero had to go and die and give Danny the one thing she never thought she’d have...her proper body. Now if only everyone else felt that way too. Life just got awesome and really really complicated all at once! Oh yeah and she can fly now. Bonus!

Disclaimer: I will try my best to not spoil anything from the book, but my book loving rambles may give more away than a traditional review. Here we go! Ramble time!

Review: 

Holy crap! After the last book this was exactly what I needed! This book was just...so good! The plot...the characters...the world...everything about it just pulls you in and doesn’t let you go. Now I may have felt that way because I didn’t have anything trying to pull me away from this book but I don’t think I would have been easily pulled away if there had been distractions. And so many facets of this story were things I didn’t expect because I had never seen them portrayed before. Like the fact Danny having to deal with the rampant day to day sexism of being a woman now that her appearance matches who she really is. I’ve never seen that in a book before and I absolutely loved it! I was so dedicated to Danny’s story from page 1 it’s ridiculous, and look at that, a perfect segue into the phenomenal characters of this book...look what I did there switching it up going out of order on ya...gotta keep ya on your toes.

Our protagonist Danny is such a phenomenal example of a genuine kind caring person who is also deeply scarred and angry. It was so amazing to read a character that was flawed and struggling and doesn’t see how much a hero she really is and the small moments when others take that double take and go, “You’re the real deal, huh?” But those moments just confuse the living hell outta Danny cause she’s just Danny, she got super powers as a fluke. She is also hilarious and courageous and smart but knows she isn’t perfect and has weaknesses. She may be the strongest person on earth physically now but she acknowledges that that isn’t everything someone needs. Danny is such a good bean, but she has issues and that isn’t glossed over which is so rare. Now the next thing I want to touch on is a very tough subject but is very prevalent in the book so I wouldn’t be a very prudent reviewer if I didn’t bring it up. Danny is, without question, an abused child. This isn’t even really a spoiler, it alludes pretty heavily to it in the blurb, but what I’m gonna touch on next does dip into that territory so I’m gonna break it into a new LONG paragraph so just scroll on by if you don’t want to read this bit.

So at one point in the book Danny mentions a health screening at school that revealed she had hearing damage in her right ear that has now been healed by the mantle of Dreadnought. At the time of the screening she didn’t realize why until her dad had another Mount Vesuvius day and she assumed her usual position of curling in on herself and turning her head to the left so he would yell into only her right ear. Now how loud and how often do you have to yell into someone’s ear to cause permanent hearing damage? I don’t know and honestly I don’t want to know. Why am I highlighting an overall tiny moment...because for me this moment jumped out and gut punched me. Brought literal tears to my eyes. Tears of pain. Tears of rage. Tears of hate. I’m a weepy bitch when I get emotional. I’ve read a lot of books that try and portray abuse and how Daniels wrote Danny’s abuse from her father took my breath away because it felt so real. There weren’t really any good days, there were bad days, there were really bad days, but most days were just anxiously waiting for the next bad day, because Danny knew there would always be a next bad day. Something that did surprise me was my feelings about Danny’s mother. I knew going in I would hate her father, before even meeting him I hated him, but her mother, that was a hate that lay dormant until it exploded onto the scene and froze me to my core. I’m not gonna get into my own demons here but there is one thing I cannot abide by and that is people turning a blind eye while someone abuses another. Danny’s mother is the textbook definition of someone who “goes along to get along”, she will do just about anything to keep the peace, but at what cost? Instead of protecting her child from someone who literally screamed so long and so loud at her child that it damaged her hearing she just sat back and let them. That’s not the worst though, no, after Danny’s transition her mom seems to be understanding of the fact she is happy being a girl and is buying her things she needs like bras and undeniably feminine shoes, only to reveal it was all to keep Danny docile so she wouldn’t cause more fights with her dad. That to me is unforgivable. Not worse than the abuse of the father, but still undeniably selfish. She never cared about Danny or listened to her and what she was really saying. She just didn’t want there to be anymore fighting. Well I’m sorry, but sometimes, as a mother, you should fight to protect your goddamn child when someone is hurting them. The last thing I’ll say before going back to the more spoiler free and fun part of the review is that the fact Danny can never make herself say she is being abused hits so close to home for me. As a reader looking in from outside, there was a scene with a member of the Legion that I felt like, as an abuse survivor myself, I was standing there begging Danny to accept her invitation. To get out of that house. To get away from her father. To see what he was doing for what it was. But I knew she wouldn’t, she wasn’t ready, and it broke my heart to watch her fly away.

Anyway moving on from all that heavy stuff lets talk about other things like some freaking superheroes and one particular vigilante. We have the Legion members: Doc Impossible, Valkyrja, Magma, Graywytch, Chlorophyll, and Carapice. Now How do I want to talk about these characters...in what order...hmmm...how about from best to worst. Okay? Okay. Great! 

I freaking love Doc Impossible! She is a character that from the moment I met her she gave me ‘kookie grandma’ character vibes and I get DOWN with kookie grandma characters. Now I know she isn’t a grandma character nor is she particularly crazy in the way she acts; it's just a vibe I get from her that I love. Now one thing I do want to say without spoiling anything is how Doc is one of the few characters that never tries to take away Danny’s agency in everything that happens around her in all this superhero craziness. Danny can always be her own person and most importantly a kid around Doc, and I feel Danny really needed that. I will stop myself now because I could go on for hours about Doc and how much I LOVE HER!

Next up we get a two for one, Valkyrja and Magma. We don’t see much of them but what we do get is pretty good. They are adult superheroes who have their own priorities surrounding what is going on with Danny, but aren’t mean or cruel and seem to genuinely care about Danny. Valkyrja is funny and surprisingly down to earth even though she is basically a scandinavian goddess of sorts. Also the hilarity of her being Danny’s long time celebrity crush never gets old. Oh Danny, you useless little lesbian. Magma is a precious big hot boy that seems like he’d give good hugs. Yeah, that's about all I got to say about him that won’t spoil anything. 

Now we have another two for one with Chlorophyll and Carapice. These two I'm between dislike and indifferent on.  They weren’t outright mean to Danny but they treated her more like a means to an end or down right refused to acknowledge she was the new Dreadnought whether they liked it or not, but we didn’t really get to see them enough to really learn more about their motivations. 

Finally to round out the Legion we have Graywytch. Excuse me while I get this out. *Exaggerated throat clear.* First of all, Imma slap that stupid robe of ya stupid head. Then Imma stab you with your stupid fancy atheme you like to wave around all the time. And don’t even start on your “Typical male, always resorting to violence” shtick, cause guess what, I’m a ciswoman and I still wanna stomp a mudhole in your ass. And for that...Imma slap your dumb bird too. *Deep breath in. Looooooong exhale.* Sorry about that. Mama had to express some rage. I have never had a hate-sink character that made me feel the fiery flames of rage quite like Graywytch...obviously. Her treatment of Danny had me gripping the book tightly and growling about slapping birds and “shanking bitches” more than I should probably admit. She is one of those characters that I love how much I hate her. She served the exact purpose she was meant to and it was never cast in a light that she may be right in her treatment of Danny, we are always aware that her mindset is ridiculous. Like the fact outside of her parents Graywytch is the only character to blatantly deadname and misgender Danny. To go off on a small tangent here I may relate too much here because I have a younger brother who is trans (don’t worry he is fine with me discussing it in reviews and such) and I went to a graduation party when my best friend graduated medical school and he was out to the family but not extended friends yet. After only referring to him by the proper pronouns for so long at home hearing the wrong ones caused legitimate eye blinking record scratch cognitive dissonance for me. I had the same feeling anytime Graywytch opened her stupid mouth and blatantly misgendered Danny. Because the way this is written Danny is Danny, she is exactly who she is meant to be. Suck it Graywytch!

Okay, I know you probably want to hear about the plot I know, but we have one more character we have to talk about and that is Calamity, the rootin’-ist tootin’-ist vigilante that ever did come through these here parts. Sorry, I have to talk like this now, it’s part of the persona, you have to commit to the persona. But real talk, I absolutely love Calamity as a look into “graycapes” and the real dive into the world of superheroes beyond the big heroes. We get to see how someone who doesn’t have the backing of the Legion goes about helping people, the little people, those that maybe the Legion way up in their tower can’t see from so high up in the clouds. And y’all know me, I love a morally gray vigilante with a heart of gold.  She had me at “You wanna go capin’?”

Now obviously I couldn’t get enough of the characters but the plot was pretty darn good too. It was so intricately woven in with Danny and her inheriting the mantle from the previous Dreadnought that she had no choice but to be an integral part of it. Now I obviously don’t have as much to say about the plot as I did the characters but know if you come for the plot you won’t be disappointed. It kept me guessing and threw me for an absolute curve ball at the end that I did not see coming! You won’t be disappointed.

So final thoughts...there isn’t much more I can say without going on an hours long squeal fest about how much I freaking loved this book and the characters and the intricacies of how Danny’s powers work and how she was written and how she interacts with different characters and just everything that would mean massive untakebackable spoilers! So I will end on this note; Danny is a character that it would have been easy to lean into the superhero aspect and let the reader forget that she was trans, but April Daniels didn’t want that. Danny was gifted the easiest transition in the history of the world. What takes most people years of HRT and surgeries and therapy Danny did in the passing of a mantle, but it never took away the fact she is and always will be trans. It was a unique reading experience that I have only been blessed with once before but that’s a story for a different review on a different day.

Queer Wrap-up: I would give my left kidney (that’s my good one btw) to give this book five unicorns, but alas I cannot, a one off conversation in an elevator hinting that a certain improbable doctor may have a one sided thing for a particular sadly straight scandinanvian god being is just not enough to count as additional rep. As much as I love this book, and I love it A LOT! We only have Danny as our queer rep and she is fantastic rep and our protagonist so a 4 unicorn rating was a no brainer on this one. Danny is the kind of trans rep I want to see more of in the world of books, YA and otherwise. Being a trans lesbian is a huge part of her character but she gets to do so much more than that in the breath of the story and that’s what I look for in great representation, so Danny easily earned these 4 unicorns on her own merit just being her amazing self.

Links: 

Goodreads

Dominc Noble’s Review

Alright so...this one got long. Ah hell, I ain't gonna apologize for it! This is a damn good book and I wanted to get my fangirl squeal on y’all. 

Oh no, I think I’ve been thinking about Calamity too much I slipped into the persona without meaning to! This book was just far too much fun to read to the point I started reading it out loud with a full cast of voices (hint: the Calamity parts were my favorite) because it flowed so well and was genuinely so funny at parts and heart wrenchingly sad in others and so action packed the next moment. I finished this book in less than a day and if I had been more present and not under a pile of blankets and wearing a headlamp I might have thought to keep a timer to tell you the exact number of hours it took me, but alas know it didn’t take me many. 

So the adventures reading in the dark continue on to the next review after this one but as always if you want to read this but don’t want to spend the money without knowing for sure you are going to like it, go to your local library. You’d be surprised what they have on their shelves just waiting to be discovered. Trust me, I’m a lesbrarian.

[artzychic27]

Painbow

 The artwork was made by @lizzey-13, who asked if I could write this. Thanks again for asking me to write this! :)

—

“And so, the British...”

Nathaniel was trying not to fall asleep from the boring lecture. He usually stays up by sketching, but he’s already gone through three sketchbooks in just one month, now there was nothing keeping him from dozing off in the middle of class. He did have another sketchbook with him, but that was for the Ladybug comic.

He looked up at the clock sitting above the door... Just seven minutes left, he could do this. Why couldn’t his bangs have been even? Then he could fall asleep without anyone noticing

“And the war brought...”

Gotta stay up... Five more minutes... Nathaniel turned his head slightly and looked out the window. It had just stopped raining, little droplets were running down the glass window pane, and the sky looked a little grey. The only thing that stood out from the dreariness was the bright rainbow in the sky... It reminded him of Marc. The boy’s name was literally ‘Rainbow’! If you took out the M.

Now that was keeping him awake. How could he sleep when Marc was on his mind? His smile, his gentle voice, the graceful way his pencil moves whenever he was writing. The mere through of the boy brought a faint smile to Nathaniel’s usually stoic face.

RIIIIING!

At the sound of the bell, Nathaniel snapped out of his thoughts. Class was over

“Class dismissed. Have a good day, everyone.”

Nathaniel gathered his belongings and made his way down the stairs where Alix was waiting for him, “You goin’ to art club?” She asked, but the smirk on her face meant she already knew the answer

“Yeah I’m going.”

Once they left the classroom, Alix, with a smirk still on her face, turned around and mimicked kissing someone. Her hands went up and down her back, “Oh, Marc. I love you so much.” She said in a low voice, mimicking Nathaniel “I love you so much, babe.”

Nathaniel rolled his eyes at his shorter friend’s antics and playfully slapped her arms, making her stop

“Okay! Okay! I’ll stop!” She said through her giggles, then she turned around and saw the familiar bright red hoodie coming down the hallway. “Go get him, Romeo.” She sends the redhead a wink before running off to the art classroom

Nathaniel fixed up his hair, straightened his blazer, and approached the writer. The closer he got, the more he noticed something off about Marc. His hair was a little more messier than usual, and he had a tired look in his eyes

“Marc?” The taller boy flinched, Nathaniel became worried, “Rainbow, are you okay?” Marc seemed less tense after hearing his nickname

“Y-yeah. I’m fine.” His eyes shifted as if he were looking for someone, “Let’s just go-”

“Marc, please tell me what’s wrong.” He took Marc’s hand in his, “You flinched when I said your name. What happened?”

“... Just the usual stuff.” He admitted, “They threw notes at me,” He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out said notes, “telling me to die, calling me some stuff, something about conversion therapy, I look like a girl...”, He sounded so bored, like he’d done this a hundred times, “They’re not even being original anymore.” He crumpled up the notes and put them in a nearby trash can “Come on, let’s get to art club.”

Nathaniel’s mouth hung open slightly. He stayed like that for a moment until he finally found his words “Rainbow, how can you just let this go?”, he asked, “This isn’t right.”

“Nath, I’m used to it.” He admitted, “I-It’s fine. Don’t worry about it.”

“But-”

“Please? For me?”

Nathaniel wanted to argue, but that smile made him give in, “Fine.” He grumbled, “But if this gets physical, I am getting involved.” Marc nodded sadly. Nathaniel leaned in and kissed Marc on the cheek, making his lips curl into a smile, “Love you.”

“Love you, too.”

—

The next week at school went pretty smoothly. The new Ladybug comic was published, paperback and online, and everyone really seemed to enjoy it. Nathaniel wanted to be happy right now, but he just couldn’t stop thinking about what happened to Marc. No one should have to endure that kind of treatment, and just be used to it... But, he promised that he wouldn’t do anything unless Marc showed up covered in bruises.

So far it’s been nothing but cruel notes in his locker and unoriginal insults. Marc just let it go and threw the notes away, but Nathaniel was pissed and close to being akumatized many times. Fortunately, Marc always managed to calm him down before any akumas could appear

“Nath!” Alix called out as she ran over to him with the latest issue of the comic in her hand, “I am loving this comic, man!” She wraps an arm around him and winks, “And don’t think I didn’t see those background gay couples.”

Nathaniel rolled his eyes, “Of course you would notice them.”

“Cuz I got gay-dar!” She exclaimed with a laugh, but that look soon faded when she saw the aggravated look in Nathaniel’s eye, “Are you okay? You’re looking a little ticked off.”

Nathaniel let out a sigh, “It’s Marc. Some guys have been messing with him, and he won’t let me do anything.”

Alix frowned, “What have they been doing?”

“What do you think?”

Alix kicked a wall in frustration, “God, that’s still happening?” Nathaniel nodded, “Well, we have to teach those asses a lesson! Make sure it doesn’t happen again!”

He shook his head, “No, I promised Marc that I wouldn’t do anything unless it got physical. So far it’s just been shitty notes and name-calling.”

He started walking to the classroom, Alix followed

“I-I don’t get it.” Nathaniel said, “He doesn’t even care. Or he does, but he doesn’t wanna admit it!”

“Well, why don’t you take it to Damocles?”

“I tried, but he won’t do anything unless I bring him evidence, and Marc keeps throwing the notes away!”, he exasperated, “And, I’m trying, I really am. But I can’t just sit back and watch-” Alix put a finger to his lips, “Alix?”

“Thought I heard something.”

‘Where’s your boyfriend, Anciel?’

‘Looks like he didn’t even want you.’

Nathaniel ran to the source of the cruel voices and found himself standing outside the locker room. He put his ear to the door and listened.

‘Stop it!’

That sounded like Marc

‘What are you gonna do, ya queer?’

Having heard enough, Nathaniel barged into the room and saw the scene before him. Marc was being pinned to the wall by Louis, the school bully. Nothing like Chloe though. She had the common decency to insult people out in the open while he cornered people and threatened them in private. Victor and Clement, his lackeys watched with amused looks as they vandalized Marc’s journal

“HEY!” The bullies were startled by the loud voice, but calmed down when they realized it was only Nathaniel

Louis sneered, “Look, guys. The queer’s boy toy came to save him.” he taunted

Ignoring him, Nathaniel stormed over to Louis and pushed him off of Marc, making him land on the floor. Nathaniel stormed over to Victor and Clement, and snatched Marc’s journal out of their hands. He took Marc’s hand and started pulling him out of the locker room, but he stopped on his tracks when he heard Louis mutter...

“Damn f*gs.”

“... Nath?”

Nathaniel scowled, but did nothing and proceeded to walk Marc out of the locker room while not saying a word. It was quiet up until Alix and Marinette approached them, both looking concerned

“Guys, what happened?!” Marinette asked

Neither of them said a word until...

“Nothing. I-it’s fine.” Marc said

Nathaniel sighed, handed Marc his defaced journal and walked away, leaving Marinette and Alix confused

—

“A boy who only wants to protect the one he loves, yet his lover chooses to suffer in silence.”

Hawkmoth held out his hand and beckoned for a butterfly to land in his palm. Once it perched itself, Hawkmoth covered it with his other hand and the power of the Miraculous filled the butterfly with dark magic, turning it into an Akuma

The Akuma flew out through the window

“Fly away my little Akuma! And evilize him!”

—

Nathaniel stormed down the hallway. He didn’t know where he was going, he just needed to think. He didn’t understand. Why wouldn’t Marc let him help? Why didn’t he care?... Why didn’t he knock out Louis? He knew Marc endured this kind of treatment constantly, but he wanted to help him... Protect him...

He was too wrapped up in his thoughts to hear the flapping of an Akuma’s wings. And he definitely didn’t notice the Akuma flying into his bisexual flag bracelet. The purple Akuma symbol appeared over his face. Hawkmoth spoke,

“Painbow, I am Hawkmoth. I understand the feeling of wanting to protect the one you love. Let me give you some assistant. All I ask in return is that you bring me Ladybug and Chat Noir’s Miraculous.”

“I’ll protect you, Marc.” His whispered as dark purple magic bubbled up from the bracelet and surrounded him. Students standing in the hallway fled, not wanting to face the wrath of the newest Akuma. Some stayed, too paralyzed to move, which was a horrible mistake. Shooting from the Akuma’s hand was a multicolored energy ball. When hit, they felt something seize them, and they were suddenly puppeted by a strange force. Their irises took of the appearance of the color wheel, and they had wide smiles plastered on their faces

“Find my Rainbow, and Louis. NOW!”

—

Alix looked around the classroom, but Nathaniel was nowhere in sight. ‘He must’ve been really upset.’ She thought, and then turned her attention to Mme. Bustier

“Now, please open your books to-”

A flash of multicolored light beamed through the window, making the students shield their eyes

‘What is that?’

‘What’s going on?’

‘They got me!’

‘Sound the Akuma Alarm!’

‘Where are you my sweet Rainbow?!’

The class looked out the window but kept low so the Akuma wouldn’t see them. They watched in horror as the red-haired villain shot rainbow energy balls at random students. Each time he missed, the energy balls would cause a massive explosion. When he did hit a student, their eyes would become multicolored and they’d have alarmingly wide smiles.

“Rainbow, sweetie?!” He called out, “Come on out! We’re going to find you!”

“Rainbow?” Alix whispered to herself. Only Marc was called ‘Rainbow’. She then came to the conclusion, “That’s Nath!”

Nathaniel, now Painbow’s bangs were swooped to the side and dyed the colors of the rainbow, his eyes were blue with no iris or pupil, and they looked like crystals. He has on a white floor-length sleeveless trench coat with a rainbow sash going across the waist, a magenta tank top with blue pants, a purple belt, and black boots. He also has on white gloves, and a rainbow cuff bracelet on his left wrist

“Marc!~” He sang, “I can’t keep you safe if you’re not by my side!” With no response, he shrugged, “I’ll just destroy the whole school until I find you, or Louis!” With that, he fired another rainbow energy ball that created a hole in the wall

Mme. Bustier turned to the class, “While Nathaniel is distracted, you all need to run out of here.” Her students nodded, “And if you find Marc or Louis, make sure they get out.” She looked out the window and sees Painbow hurling lockers at panicked students who weren’t under his control

“NO ONE LEAVES UNTIL I HAVE MY RAINBOW!”

“Run!” Bustier ordered, and the class did not hesitate to run for the door, but when opened, they backed away when they saw the Akuma. The inhumanly wide smile plastered on his face was not easing their nerves

“I clearly said, no one leaves until I have my Rainbow.”

Alix cautiously approached her Akumatized friend, “Nath, whatever’s wrong, just-”

Before she could say another word, Painbow summoned several rainbow energy balls that he shot at the class. Marinette, Adrien, Alya, Nino, Mylene, and Alix managed to avoid them and run out the room, but the rest were now under his control

“Fine me Marc Anciel and Louis Kress! And if you see Ladybug and Chat Noir, take their Miraculous!”, he ordered, and the smiling multicolored eyed students ran out in search for the two

—

Looking through the window in Mme. Mendeleiev’s classroom, Marc watched in fear as the controlled students caused havoc in the school looking for him, while his akumatized boyfriend shouted his nickname and blasted rainbow energy balls from his hands

He sighed, “This is my fault.” He hid his face in his gloved hands

Aurore frowned and placed a hand on his shoulder, “Marc, don’t say that! You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“B-but he’s mad because I was getting bullied by Louis,” He explained “and I told him not to do anything.”

“It’s Louis’ fault, not yours.” Aurore said, then smirked, “And Nath’s probably only after you so he can kiss that cute face of yours.”, she joked, causing Marc’s lips to curl into a smile “Ladybug and Chat Noir will handle this. Nathaniel will be fine, and you two can talk it out, okay?” At Marc’s nod, she gives him a side hug

“Rainbow...” Painbow’s eerie voice called out

Mme. Mendeleiev signals for the students to get down so Painbow won’t see them. They crouch under the window as Painbow walks by the classroom

Marc let out a small whimper, making Mireille cover his mouth. They hear the Akuma’s footsteps fade away and let out sighs of relief

Mme. Mendeleiev stood, “Okay, he’s gone.”

Right as she said this, the door to the classroom exploded outwards in a cloud of splinters and rainbow dust, causing everyone to duck and cover. Looking up, Marc saw his villain boyfriend. His smile somehow became even more unnerving when his eyes landed on Marc

“Hello, My Rainbow.” He cooed as he approached him. Before he could get any closer, Mme. Mendeleiev stood in front of him, putting on a brave face in front of the Akuma

“You will not lay a finger on one of my students!” She said in a commanding tone

Painbow didn’t look threatened, and instead let out a laugh. Then with a flick of his wrist, an energy balls shot from his hand, hitting Mendeleiev, and putting her under his control. She stepped to the side, no longer blocking him. He looked around the classroom before honing in on Marc, who was backing into a corner with Aurore and Mireille

He gave a chilling smile, “Rainbow, please come here.” Seeing that Aurore and Mireille had no intentions of letting his love go, Painbow summoned two more energy balls that when thrown at the two weather girls, their eyes become multicolored. “Bring me my Rainbow.”, he commanded.

Aurore and Mireille complied as they dragged a struggling Marc over to the Akuma, and into his waiting arms, “I missed you!”

Marc tried to pry the Akuma’s arms off of him, but to no avail, “Nath! Stop this!” Painbow’s smile strained, “I told you, I don’t care about Louis, just-” Painbow put a finger to his lip, silencing him

“Sweetie, I don’t like your tone very much.” Instead of summoning an energy ball, Painbow kissed Marc’s forehead and the green of the writer’s irises faded and became multicolored. And instead of the creepily wide smiles the other students had, he had a look of bliss. He threw his arms around Painbow and kissed his cheeks affectionately

Seeing a crowd forming around them, Painbow summoned multiple energy balls that flew around the room, hitting each student and putting them under his control

—

Once Ladybug and Chat Noir ran out of their hiding spots after transforming, they found themselves in the courtyard being assaulted by their mind controlled school mates. The ones who weren’t under the Akuma’s control managed to evacuate with the heroes’ help. They spared a glance at Painbow, who had Marc settled in his arms before leaping out of the open roof of the school

“That’s gotta be Nathaniel!” Ladybug rounded up ten students with her yoyo before hurling, then locking them in a storage closet

“Can’t we deal with these guys later?!” Chat asked as he whacked two students away, “There’s too many of them!”

“Alright, let’s go!” Ladybug flung another student away before using her yoyo to zip out of the school, Chat followed, vaulting after her using his staff

As they leapt from roof to roof, Ladybug and Chat came across Alix, Nino, Mylene, Alya, and a few other students who have taken cover above ground. “Are you all okay?” Ladybug asked and received nods along with scattered ‘yes’ and ‘we’re okay’.

“Ladybug,” Alix said as she approached the two heroes, “Chat Noir! Nathaniel is looking for Louis Kress. I saw him running from our classmates! They’re probably still looking for him!”

Ladybug nodded before she opened up the phone setting on her yoyo and pulled up a live-stream, showing Nadja, also under Painbow’s control

“Don’t bemused! It’s just the news!” Nadja said in a cheery tone, “Louis Kress, our second in command’s offender, was recently spotted in the Louvre! Painbow’s loyal followers are doing everything in their power to find him keep him from escaping.”

Ladybug smiled then turned to the students, “Stay safe. We’ll handle this.”

--

“I’LL FIND YOU, KRESS! EVEN IF I HAVE TO TEAR DOWN THIS ENTIRE PLACE TO DO IT!”, Painbow yelled as he lifted a sarcophagus before throwing it away

Wake up!

He’s controlling you!

Your eyes are supposed to be green, stupid!

“Is something wrong, my Rainbow?”

Marc blinked his multicolored eyes as he looked at the Akuma punching a column. He smiled and shook his head, “I’m fine.”

Painbow gave a warm smile as he cupped Marc’s face in his hands, “Are you sure?” Marc nodded, “That’s good. You should be thrilled. Louis and everyone just like him will be out of our lives forever.”

What did he mean by the last part?!

Wake up, Anciel!

Your boyfriend is an Akuma!

He’s gonna kill Louis!

“I can’t wait.”

Painbow leaned in to give him a kiss, but then the glowing purple Akuma symbol appeared over his eyes and he clutched his head in pain.

“What is it?! What’s wrong?!”, Marc asked frantically

Hawkmoth spoke, “Don’t get distracted, Painbow! You had your chance to take the Miraculous, but didn’t seize your moment! Mess this up, or I’ll take away your powers!”

“Alright, just stop it!”, Painbow begged. The searing pain stopped, and he saw Marc looking at him with concern, “I’m fine. Someone is just a little impatient.”

Aurore ran up to the couple, “Painbow, we found him!”, she cheered

Painbow beamed at the news before gathering Marc in his arms, “Finally!”, Aurore lead them into the paintings gallery where they found Louis surrounded by a mob of controlled citizens and being restrained by Kim and Juleka, “Louis, what a pleasure.” He set Marc down and moved toward his victim, looking at him like a jungle cat that had caught its prey

“L-look man! I’ll leave Anciel alone! I swear!”, he pleaded, “I won’t bother you, o-or mess with that goth chick and her girlfriend!”

Painbow’s blue eyes widened at that last sentence, “Excuse me?”, he looked up at Juleka, “Jules, is this true?”

The goth girl nodded, the unnatural smile never leaving her face. Painbow grinded his teeth as he summoned another energy ball, only the colors were darker shades, “I’ve been DYING to use this one!” Louis closed his eye and turned away, knowing very well that this was the end for him. Suddenly, a familiar whizzing sound hit everyone’s ears as Ladybug’s yoyo wrapped around Painbow’s wrist. He lost his focus, and the energy ball bounced around the room before hitting a portrait, burning a hole in the center

Chat winced, “That would’ve been bad.”

“Nathaniel! Do you really want to do this?”, Ladybug asked, trying to reason with him, “What would Marc say?!”

Painbow folded his arms across his chest, “He doesn’t mind.”, he turns to Marc, “Do you, Rainbow?”

Yes! You just tried to murder him!

“Do whatever you think is best.”

“See? He’s fine with it.”

“LUCKY CHARM!”

What dropped in her hands was...

“A roll of tape?”

Using Marc, lead Painbow out of the museum, the others will follow

Have Chat Noir Cataclysm the security system, the bars will drop, trapping Painbow’s followers. He’ll be alone and defenseless

Deflect any of his blasts, then cause a distraction so he’s vulnerable. While vulnerable, wrap the tape around Painbow’s hands, he won’t be able to use his powers

Break his bracelet and free the Akuma

“Chat, go to the security system, and wait for my signal!” With a salute, Chat Noir made his way over to the security system. Using her yoyo, Ladybug wrapped it around Marc’s waist. With a yelp, he was pulled into her arms. “Come and get him, Painbow!”

Terror shone through his voice as he screamed, “SAVE HIM! SAVE MY RAINBOW! We’ll deal with Kress later!”

Ladybug hoisted Marc over her shoulder and ran as Painbow and his followers chased her. She was a few feet away from the gallery entrance when she yelled, “CHAT, NOW!”

“CATACLYSM!”

Chat touched the security system, making it short circuit before turning black and disintegrating into dust. Ladybug and Painbow managed to slide under the metal bars before they hit the floor. The rest were stuck in the gallery with no way out

“GIVE HIM BACK!”, Painbow yelled as he tried to blast the heroes, only to fail as they deflected each attack

“Chat! Cover me!”

“On it, M’Lady!” Chat got in front of Ladybug and blocked Painbow’s attacks by spinning his staff. While Painbow is focused on the leather-clad hero, Ladybug used the opportunity to wrap her yoyo around Painbow’s ankle, and yanked it so he’d trip

Painbow quickly got back up, but before he could attack again, he found his hands bound together by red duct-tape with black spots. He looked up and saw Ladybug reaching for his bracelet. “NO!”, she smashed the bracelet, releasing the Akuma

Catching it with her yoyo, Ladybug said, “No more evildoing for you, little Akuma. Time to de-evilize! Gotcha!” From the yoyo emerged a newly purified white butterfly, “Bye bye little butterfly.” She then tossed the tape roll into the air, “MIRACULOUS LADYBUG!”

Thousands of ladybugs burst from the tape and spread out all over the town, repairing all of the damages. The afflicted citizens returned to their normal selves, confused as to what they’re doing. The magic swept over the students who took shelter on the rooftop, and they were back at Dupont. The Akuma’s dark magic bubbled away, leaving Nathaniel Kurtzberg, confused as to what’s happening

The two heroes fist-bumped, “Pound it!”, while Nathaniel held his head, still very confused

“Nath?”

The redhead looked up as Marc ran over and threw his arms around him, whispering about how he was glad that he was okay, “... Marc, I-I’m so sorry!”

“It wasn’t your fault,” Marc murmured, “it’s okay.”

“No! I should’ve listened to you, but when I saw what Louis did, I-I just-”

Marc cupped Nathaniel’s face in his hands, then kissed his forehead, “You only wanted to protect me, Nath.”

Ladybug smiled, “Marc’s right, Nathaniel. This was Hawkmoth’s doing, not yours.” She wanted to say more, but hers’ and Chat’s Miraculous beeped. They only had three minutes left, “We gotta go now. Bug out!” She and Chat Noir ran out of the museum to find a place to detransform

—

“Well, if it isn’t Painbow.”

Don’t do anything. Don’t pay any attention to him. Nathaniel thought to himself, trying to stay calm, not wanting to become Akumatized again, “Is that supposed to upset me or something? Not the first time I’ve been Akumatized.”

“Well, look at you.” Louis said mockingly, “I guess without your precious Rainbow, you finally grew a spine.”

Don’t do anything. Don’t do anything.

“Screw off, Kress!” A familiar voice shouted. Nathaniel looked at saw Marc, standing behind Louis with his arms crossed, “Need I remind you that you’re part of the reason he got Akumatized?” He walked passed Louis, making sure to bump him with his shoulder, then he took Nathaniel’s hand in his and the two walked to art club

“Yeah, that’s right! Run away, ya pussies!”

“What do you think we’re doing?!”, Marc yelled back

“I’ll be waiting for you outside, Anciel! Your boy toy can’t protect you forever!”, he raised an eyebrow as someone tapped him on the shoulder

Ahem

He turned around, and was met with Alix’s fist nailing him in the face. He fell to the floor with a thud and held his hands over his face in pain as Alix and Marinette stood over him

Marinette glared down at him, “Next time you think about insulting someone for their preferences, remember this.”

“Totally worth the detention I’m getting.” Alix said with a smirk

[trashyswitch]

Virgil's Post-Halloween Adventure With Roman

Virgil has been really down since Halloween came and went. So, Roman creates a full Halloween city so Virgil and some of the other sides can bring their Halloween fantasies to life.

This was requested by @puppysparkles03. You wanted drastic measures, so: HAVE AN ENTIRE HALLOWEEN TOWN! XD Hope you like it!

Virgil had been in a sad mood since November started. Virgil got his chance to dress up and be his scary self for halloween but...now that Halloween was over, Virgil had grown sad. He loved halloween. Why couldn’t it be Halloween for longer than an evening? The only things that have made Virgil somewhat satisfied was his Halloween candy. Virgil’s been eating tons of halloween candy as of late. From sweets to mini bags of chips, to juice boxes and candy corns, even a rice crispy square ended up in his halloween bag. That was a nostalgic moment for him. It was nice to eat a rainbow (gay) rice crispy square.

One day, Roman managed to get Virgil out of his room for a little adventure in the mind palace. Despite enjoying being out of the room, Virgil did grow annoyed by all the walking. “Can’t you conjure up a train or a car? Or, maybe even a horse and buggy?” Virgil asked.

Roman giggled. “Come on, Virgil! It’s such a pretty day for a walk. Wouldn’t you agree?” Roman asked. Virgil only let out a grunt as a reply. Roman turned to face him. “Come on, Hallo-whiner. I think you’re gonna like the special place that I conjured up, just for you:” Roman told him, grabbing his hand.

Virgil looked up at Roman with the smallest glimmer of hope in his eyes. Roman summoned some black eyeshadow, and help Virgil touch it up. “There ya go. And some blood…” Roman started drawing liquid red face paint dribbles that ran down the corners of Virgil’s mouth to the sides of his chin. “There! Maybe some red lipstick-”

“No red lipstick.” Virgil told him.

“Oooor no red lipstick.” Roman changed up his wording before putting the lid on his lipstick. “Okay! Looking all halloweeny!” Roman declared.

“I thought Halloween was over?” Virgil told him.

“Not unless you want it to be over. And something tells me you don’t want Halloween to be over just yet.” Roman admitted.

Roman picked up Virgil and walked up a hill. Soon, the luscious green grass disappeared from his vision and dark purples, oranges and blacks filled his vision. Virgil’s eyes widened when he realized what it was: It was an entire halloween city!

“What do you think?” Roman asked.

“Are you kidding?!” Virgil reacted. “I LOVE IT!” Virgil yelled, grabbing his shoulders with a big smile on his face. Roman giggled and looked over at the halloween city. “Now: I have given you the ability to snap into the halloween costume of your dreams!” Roman explained to him. “For example:” Roman snapped and watched as a bunch of material surrounded him before disappearing with his costume on himself.

“Oooooh! A roman emperor?” Virgil specified.

“Indeed! A Roman emperor who must rule with an iron fist!” Roman explained. His clothing consisted of a white robe with a brown rope tied around his middle, and a long red sash that was wrapped around his left arm and flowed down the rest of his lower body. To top it off, Roman had a golden laurel wreath on his head! He looked amazing, to be honest!

“Do you have a costume preference of your own, Virgil?” Roman asked.

Virgil nodded and snapped his fingers. A whole bunch of material surrounded Virgil, and soon flew away and disappeared to reveal Virgil’s brand new costume.

Roman gasped and dropped his jaw. “OH MY GOSH- SWEENEY TODD! YESSS!” Roman reacted, covering his mouth.

Virgil was dressed up as Johnny Depp’s version of Sweeney Todd. He had his brown hair spray dyed black and gelled back, with a white big streak in the middle left of the hairline. He had the slightly tattered vest tuxedo with a belt on a pair of striped pants, male ankle boots and a pair of fingerless gloves on his hands. In his vest pocket were some plastic traditional barber knives, and in his pants pocket was a vintage pocket watch.

“HELL YEAH! I LOVE Sweeney Todd! Classic musical!” Roman declared.

Virgil looked at his own costume and started acting a little like a fanboy. “I’ve always wanted to dress up as this character, but it’s a really hard costume to pull off.” Virgil admitted.

“Oh! You forgot something!” Roman told him. Roman summoned a long black coat and put it on Virgil’s shoulders. Virgil smiled and put it on. “It’s gonna be a little cold in there.” Roman let him know.

Virgil blushed a little. “Thank you.” Virgil replied.

“Now come, my killer barber! We shall visit Halloween City!” Roman declared, pointing to the city. Suddenly, a big horse and buggy came rolling up right beside them. Virgil and Roman hopped into the horse and buggy before the horse was signalled to start clop-clopping to the city.

The city itself was FILLED to the brim with stereotypical halloween stuff. There were stores for buying and trying on halloween costumes of large variety, big towers with witches and cauldrons so you could make your own spells, a big library filled with horror, thriller and grotesque-themed books and movies in them, a cemetery filled with floating ghosts, skeletons and zombies, and there were even caves surrounded by dead forest that housed the cats, snakes, bats and vampires. The more that Virgil saw out the sides of the horse and buggy windows, the more excited Virgil got!

“You made all this?!” Virgil reacted.

“Yes, I did!” Roman replied.

Virgil gasped and looked around more as the horse and buggy dropped them off in the middle of the city. The middle of the city has a simple, run down fountain in the middle with vines circulating the brick water pit. In the middle of the water fountain, was a few skulls lined up like a square with an infinite waterfall running through their eyes, nose holes and mouths, that fell into the water pit below. It was kinda creepy, but...strangely beautiful to look at.

Virgil almost immediately ran up to the big victorian library. “COME ON, ROMAN!” Virgil yelled to him.

“I’M COMING!” Roman yelled, quickly catching up to him.

Virgil walked up the stairs and quickly opened up the library door. The Victorian library was just as vintage-looking as it was on the outside. Only change being the place looked like a clean kind of vintage. The metal looked polished, the huge shelves looked old but not dirty or super run down, the ladder was wooden but stable and well made, and the middle aisles of shelves had movies and VHS tapes that you could borrow! This wasn’t just a victorian era library...this was a super old building that had been well kept and updated throughout the centuries!

Virgil happily looked around. “Logan would be over the moon about this.” Virgil told Roman.

“I know! He already IS!” Roman told him, before pointing to the ancient kids stories sections. There, hidden within the aisles, was Logan reading a Brothers Grimm fairytales from the 1800’s!

Logan looked up and smiled. “Hello, Virgil. I love the costume.” he greeted, giving Virgil an excited smile.

Logan was dressed up as Charlie ‘The Tramp’ Chaplin. He had the large bowl hat, the mustache, the large shoes, the suit and everything in between! He even had a bamboo cane perched up against the library shelf while he read.

“Hi Logan. Charlie Chaplin, huh?” Virgil reacted.

“Indeed. One of the most well known actors of the silent era.” Logan replied.

Virgil smiled and decided to ignore the bad things about Chaplin...for now. “Enjoying the book?” Virgil asked.

“Yes, I am! This is simply a collection of the Brothers Grimm stories compressed into one novel. It’s very interesting understanding just how much grim topics they could handle back in the day.” Logan told him.

Virgil nodded and started to look around himself. He found an aisle filled with classic novels like Little Woman, The Pride and The Prejudice, the Nancy Drew series, the Frankenstein novel and the original Dracula, an aisle filled with Shakespeare books, an aisle filled with outdated nonfiction books on multiple subjects, an entire aisle dedicated to the decades of encyclopedias, and even an entire aisle dedicated to the Marvel comic books throughout the decades! Virgil practically LOST it when he found Edgar Allen Poe novels, and quickly bought them. To make things even cooler, Roman summoned some 1800’s original bills and coins so he could pay for them! Virgil owed him a huge hug for that one.

After visiting the library, Virgil was brought to the cemetery to take a walk with Roman. “You are gonna LOVE this!” Roman told him. They only got a few minutes to walk around the cemetery before the huge clock tower struck 12.

Suddenly, a bunch of skeletons came digging out from under the graves and started dancing! The skeletons were very cartoon-like, similarly to Disney’s skeleton animation! And the best part? They were listening to ‘Spooky Scary Skeletons’ on a big radio as they danced around!

Virgil was smiling through the whole thing. “This is awesome!” Virgil reacted.

“I’ll say!” someone said, walking up to him from behind. Virgil turned around and widened his eyes. “Oh my…Are you Ed Gein?” Virgil asked.

Remus chuckled. “You bet I am!” Remus replied.

Virgil rubbed his nose, but chuckled a little. “You couldn’t go for leather face? Or Norman Bates?” Virgil asked.

“Nope! Gotta go all out!” Remus declared. “And what better than a guy who does more grave-digging than murdering?” Remus joked.

Virgil nodded, but awkwardly looked away. He wasn’t sure how he felt about Remus’s costume.

“WHY HELLO THERE!” someone yelled behind him. Virgil yelped and turned around. It was one of the dancing, singing skeletons!

“O-oh...You talk?” Virgil reacted.

“You BET I do! Call me Skelly!” the skeleton introduced, holding out their bone hand.

Virgil raised an eyebrow and chuckled at the name. “Virgil.” He replied, shaking the bone hand.

“What’s so funny? Is my name rib-ticklin’ to ya?” Skelly asked, showing off his ribcage.

Virgil stifled a laugh and pushed their shoulder. “Knock off the puns. You’re not as humerus as you think.” Virgil told him.

Skelly frowned at first, but quickly caught on. Skelly pointed to his own shoulder and smiled widely, before laughing. “Not bad, ol’ chum!” Skelly reacted. “Now tell me: Are you a skeleton too?” Skelly asked.

Virgil thought for a moment. “Well, not exactly. I do have a skeleton in me, but it’s filled and covered with flesh and organs.” Virgil explained.

“Wow! So, you have muscles?” Skelly asked. Virgil nodded. “A heart?” Skelly asked, pointing to the left side of his own chest. VIrgil giggled and nodded. “Oh! What about a skull?” Skelly asked before knocking on the top of Virgil’s head.

Virgil yipped at first and flapped his hands above his head. “Oi! My noggin’s not for knockin’!” Virgil warned.

Skelly chuckled at that. “What about ribs? Do you have a ribcage too?” Skelly asked, poking the left side of his ribcage.

Virgil jumped and stepped back, throwing his hands up in defense. “Okay buddy...No poking.” Virgil warned.

“Why not? Ticklish ribs?” Skelly asked, poking his ribcage again. Virgil wheezed somewhat and flapped his hands at him. “Dohon’t you dare…” Virgil warned.

Roman walked up to Virgil and picked the man up before throwing him at Skelly. “Have fun!” Roman told him.

Virgil squeaked and reached his arm out. “NO!” before landing into Skelly’s arms.

Skelly caught him perfectly and held him like a baby. “What a cute little fleshy skeleton I have! I could tickle you here,” Skelly started poking and prodding his ribs. “Here, here,” Skelly poked his front ribs. “Here, Aaaand HERE!” Skelly placed its claw tips onto Virgil’s belly and started skittering his fingers on his belly.

“What thehehehe- HAHAhahahaha! Whyhyhyhy thihihihis?!” Virgil asked, falling into a fit of giggles.

“Oh! It’s quite simple, really. I remember hearing from a certain someone, that your black makeup turns a dark purple when you’re all flustered! Isn’t that right, Emperor Romulus?” Skelly explained.

Roman giggled and shook his head. “It’s Roman, Skelly.” Roman corrected.

“Oh yeah…” Skelly muttered as he moved his fingers to Virgil’s sides.

“WAIT! NAHAhahahat myhyhyhy sihihihides! Lahahay ohohoff, mahahahan!” Virgil ordered.

“Lay? Okay.” Skelly laid Virgil down onto the dirt ground and resumed squeezing his sides.

“ThAHAHAt’s nahahahat whahat Ihihi meheheant, ya doohohohofus!” Virgil reacted.

“Really? When you said ‘lay off’, you didn’t mean ‘put me onto the ground and continue tickling me’? I could’ve sworn that was what you meant.” Skelly teased.

“Thahahat’s NAHAHAT whahahat I meheheant, ahahand YOHOHOHOU knohohow ihihihihit!” Virgil shot back.

“I don’t understand why you’re being so harsh on me. Looking at my point of view, you’d be confused too.” Skelly lightly argued.

Then, Skelly decided to pull a move that would drive anyone mad: Skelly started quickly spidering his fingers up and down Virgil’s ribs and sides. “NOOO! NO, NONONO- SKEHEHELLYHYHYHY! STAHAHAHAHAP!” Virgil laughed. Virgil’s eyeshadow color started to change the longer that he was tickled. And the higher up that Skelly’s fingers went, the more hysterical that Virgil’s laughter became. “WAHAHAITWAIT! DON’TGOAHAHANY- AAAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! CUHUHUHUT IHIHIHIT OHOHOUHUHUT!” Virgil pleaded through his laughter.

“But why? You seem to be having so much fun! I can see it in your eyes!” Skelly proclaimed. “Well...below them, anyway.” Skelly followed up. Virgil’s eyeshadow had turned a pretty hue of purple rather quickly. Roman’s mouth widened excitedly as he gazed upon Virgil’s flustered face. “Roman was right! His eyeshadow CAN turn purple when flustered and happy!” Skelly reacted.

Roman smiled. “So Virgil Sanders enjoys being tickled?” He asked.

“IHIHIHI DOHOHOHO NOHOHOHOT!” Virgil tried to protest.

Roman just giggled at this. “Your eyes and eyeshadow marks give you away. Not only are you flustered by tickling, you seem to love the affection!” Roman explained out loud.

“Well! Rattle my bones and call me Skelly!” Skelly declared in surprise. “This Sweeney Todd is kinda cute!” Skelly declared.

“AHAHAHAM NOHOHOHOHOT!” Virgil protested.

“You really are, Virgil.” Roman replied. “Right, Skelly?” Roman asked.

“You are indeed, right!” Skelly replied.

As much as Skelly wanted to keep tickling him, Roman soon gave him the signal to stop. Skelly followed what he said and retreated his bony fingers. Stepping aside, Skelly let Roman walk up to him and help Virgil up.

“You okay?” Roman asked. Virgil nodded and took Roman’s hand, allowing him to help him up. Virgil’s eyeshadow was still quite purpley after all that. Roman giggled at this and rubbed his cheek. “Still flustery purple.” Roman told him happily.

Virgil giggled and shook his head as he pushed Roman’s hands away. “Stahap that.” Virgil told him, still quite flustered. Roman, Remus and Skelly all laughed at this.

Soon enough, Virgil and Roman moved on, to explore the rest of the city. As they left, Virgil and Roman gave Skelly a goodbye wave. “Bye Skelly! Have fun singing!” Roman yelled to him.

“Will do!” Skelly replied.

“Thank you for the fun time, Skelly!” Virgil said to him.

“Not a problem at all!” Skelly yelled back.

Virgil, Roman and Remus went to a special costume shop next, where he happily got himself a pair of bat wings and a vampire cloak!

By the time the clan got back, Virgil and the sides were feeling as happy as could be. They quickly started showing off their stuff to each other.

Remus got a fake skeleton from the prop shop, a witch potion bottle filled with thick blood, and a big black victorian portrait from the vintage market! He was non stop talking about having his room all halloween-y, till Remembrance day comes around.

Logan got himself a dozen books, a vintage writing book, a fountain pen and multiple ink reloading viles! He was all set for some journaling.

Roman got himself a classic king crown, an empty treasure chest to fill with items, and some vintage, expensive-looking jewellery for himself! He looked super excited to look like he was covered in riches.

Besides the bat wings and the cloak, Virgil also got himself some ruby red lipstick, a pretty black vampire choker, and a pair of black formal shoes.

With how the day went, Roman could proudly proclaim that Halloween City was a big success! Roman placed the entire imagined place into a pretty notebook and carved the words ‘Halloween City’ and ‘open on November 1, 2021’ into the front before placing it onto his book shelf...

[sirloozelite]

Galaxy-8: Anakin and Padmé attend a parade

(Galaxy-8 is full of insanity and craziness in every single corner. Nothing makes sense, characters ages are all flippy flopped, and everything should be taken with a grain of salt. Enjoy the madness)

Scene: The streets of Naboo’s capital city. Jedi Padawan Anakin Skywalker and Quuen Padmé Amidala walk the streets to join a crowd of people watching a parade of some kind.

Anakin: So... what exactly is this parade again?

Padmé: Oh... right, I didn’t tell you did I? My bad. Anyways, it’s Naboo’s annual Pride Parade.

Anakin: Pride Parade? I didn’t know the Naboo did those!

Padmé: Yeah... we believe in all forms of love, gender regardless. Screw what the naysayers think. So, we like to have a parade once a year. I always come to them.

Anakin: Oh... you do? (suddenly worried that Padmé won’t be interested in him) Does that mean that you are...

Padmé: Ha.. no no... not me. But two of my handmaidens are girlfriends, and another one is open about her sexuality. They march in the parade, so I come to support them. Look... there they are! Hi guys!

Padmé waves at two people marching in the parade, who wave back at her.

Anakin: Well, there’s those two... but where’s the other one... Sabé is it?

Padmé: Dunno. She’ll be around somewhere though. Pretty cool huh? Anyone you recognize?

Anakin: Yeah it’s pretty cool. And no... no one I know. I mean... what are the chances of someone I recognize being a part of...

Suddenly, a new voice calls out as someone comes charging over to Anakin with a wide smile on her face. It is Anakin’s Jedi Master, Ahsoka Tano.

Ahsoka: Hey Skyguy! Fancy seeing you here!!

Anakin: this parade??? What the hell are you doing here Master?!?

Ahsoka: Celebrating and marching with my pride buddies!

Anakin’s eyes nearly pop out of his sockets. Ahsoka is dressed in a rainbow colored Jedi robes, and her lekku and montral stripes, usually blue and white, have been painted in rainbow colors as well.

Anakin: 0_0

Padmé: Master Tano! Wonderful to see you here! I wasn’t expecting a Jedi Master of your esteem to march in this parade! You do us a great honor! I didn’t even know you were gay!

Ahsoka: Honor is all my Queen Amidala. And I mean... how could I resist in partaking! I feel right at home with all these pretty ladies around me!!!

Anakin: Oh god no.... you are so embarrassing Master!!!

Ahsoka: Ha! That’s my job as your Jedi Master Skyguy! Anyways, gotta go before I get left behind! Woo... pride for life! Love is love! (charges off to rejoin the march)

Padmé: XD

Anakin: Sigh... why is she like this?! Stupid crazy Bisexual Togruta Jedi Master!!!!

Padmé: I think it’s cute. More Jedi could stand to be like her and open with their emotions.

Anakin: No they really could not!!! At least not as open minded as my Master!!!!

Padmé: ... I don’t follow?

Anakin: Best you don’t know.

Padmé: Ok???

An hour passes as the pride march continues. Eventually it begins to move onto another sector of the city.

Anakin: Well... that was an insightful experience. What’s next?

Padmé: Figured we could go and get some food. I know a great little cafe nearby. You up for it?

Anakin: Yes! Ahem.... I mean... yeah sure why not.

Padmé: ... ok then. Let’s go. I know a shortcut down an alleyway nearby. Follow me.

Padmé begins to lead the way, Anakin walking alongside her.

Anakin: Hey... did you end up spotting your other handmaiden in the parade?

Padmé: ... now that you mention it no. I wonder where Sabé got to? She doesn’t usually miss this. Maybe she’s ill.

Anakin: Possibly.

The duo turn a corner and are about to enter the alleyway when they spot something in it... or more like spot two people. One has the other pushed up against the wall whilst they get ‘touchy-feely’ with each other.

Realizing they have been caught, the couple break their kiss and turn to look at the mortified teenagers. Anakin instantly recognizes one of them... and honestly... he wasn’t surprised!

Anakin: OH YOU’VE GOT TO BE KIDDING ME!!!

Ahsoka: Oh... hi Skyguy! Do ya mind? I’m kinda in the middle of something here!

Anakin: 0_0  MASTER!!! WHAT THE HELL?!?!? AT LEAST TAKE IT SOMEWHERE PRIVATE!! AND WHO THE HELL IS THIS?!?!? (gestures to the woman in Ahsoka’s arms)

Ahsoka: Oh right... where are my manners. This is...

Padmé then interrupts, having recognized the other woman.

Padmé: Sabé?!?

Sabé: Heh heh... hey Padmé. Fancy seeing you here. Don’t mind us! Just having some fun! There’s something really awesome about kissing a Jedi Master! I feel like a naughty schoolgirl breaking the rules!

Ahsoka: Ooohhh.. I like that image!

Anakin: 0_0

Padmé: 0_0

Sabé: XD

Ahsoka: XD

Anakin: WHY ME?!?! WHY DID I GET HER AS MY MASTER?!?!?

Padmé: I’m starting to wonder the same thing! God help us all!!

[the-reaper-of-maidens]

Her Last Letter to Her Birth Family

((HERE BE THE ANGST~ TW: mentions of homophobia, abuse, and LOTS of swearing. This is basically the last thing the Reaper says to her birth family when she fucks off to who knows where, before ending up in Romania. This is before she got turned, of course, so still human, still the Blogger.))

To my Shitty Family,

So… I hope you’re all happy to know that… I’m out of your hair for good. No, I’m not dead, because I won’t give you the satisfaction of having a dead gay daughter. I’m just gone, that’s all, and I finally have the guts to say all that I wanted to say in this letter. I hope that when you say my name, your tongues burn a thousand lashes, burning the same way you scared me into thinking I would when I die.

To my grandparents, all four of them… I hope when y’all die, ya fucking rot. I wasn’t surprised when ya tried to get me into “therapy” when ya found out I’m a lesbian… well, that didn’t fucking work, ya asshole boomers. I’ll remember your shock and horror when you saw my new piercings, and I’ll relish it. I laugh when y’all (and Ma and Pop, too) thought Satan took over my life when I got into metal. Nothing left to say there, because you���ll croak soon.

To Ma, I don’t know where the fuck to start. You gaslighting, slap-happy bitch. You hurt me, physically and emotionally. You tried to slice me when you saw my first tattoo and tried to rip out my piercings plenty of times. YOU made me feel like I was nothing but a B E A S T because I didn’t want to be a prissy little southern belle like you claimed to be. You said you wanted what’s best for me and that this is all my fault. I am who I am, Ma, and no silly book is gonna tell me that you’re right. You said God made everyone in His image, and that He loves everyone… but then you turn around and spit venom at me for my choices and how I was “too young to know” when I was 17. You gossiped to your little brunch friends about how I’ll be destined for failure because of the way I am. You tried to take away the rainbows and my blog and my money a lotta times, but I’m David in this battle, and you, Goliath, and I won… I won, and there’s nothing you can do about it, because I’ll be way out there by the time you find this letter.

To Pop… FUCK. YOU. You’re a useless sack of shit who did nothing but hit me and Ma, and spoiled Matt rotten. Sure, Ma’s just as shitty, but… wow, smacking anyone around is a fucked up thing to do, man. I always knew ya hated me, because I was a tomboyish girl who didn’t want to submit to your stupid outdated morals. Actually, I think ya just hated me because I was a girl. Would explain why even when Matt fucked up all the time, ya still supported him. Never laid a fucking finger on him, because “he’s a boy, boys are supposed to be like that” and you’d belt me for even saying that people should treat each other nicely. I wonder how long it’s gonna take for you to try to track me down and drag me back to hell… if you do, I won’t go down without a fight, and I’ll drag you down with me. I fucking dare you.

To Matt… Tch, what a worthless lil’ baby brother. I was hoping you’d learn better… But no, you’ve been brainwashed into this shitty life. Ya outed me to our entire family. Ya loved calling me a dyke and a “dirty fucking whore” because of… well, my entire being. I never got that other one… seriously, you’d think Ma would let me go out at night with anyone? Let alone a girl? Come on, ya gotta have at least one brain cell in there to know I don’t sleep around. You’re 23, dude. Not to mention you’d rat me out to Ma and Pop every time I called ya out on your bullshit or every time you treated your female classmates like shit. Yeah, I bet ya liked seeing me take the goddamn fall, knowing ya got off scot-free. I let ya walk all over me like a doormat for too long, so… I hope me leaving this hellhole will finally force ya to wake the fuck up.

Like… fuck. If y’all get infected with the t-Virus or some shit, and home ends up becoming another Raccoon City, I wouldn’t feel bad… hell, even if another Las Plagas incident happened, I still wouldn’t feel bad, and parasites are even worse than viruses, in my opinion.

With all the fiery hate,

The daughter who is dead to y’all now