#God this is tmi. Probably

[iamthetruestrepairman]

my problem is my favourite thing to do is to act more unaware and unsure of things than I am so I have the upper hand in interactions but my least favourite thing is having people think I’m stupid

[honeypleasejustkillme]

i miss the rage (being hypersexual)

[jascurka]

Idk where to ask but does anyone ever feel like they're gonna faint from a memory or a deja vu or you had or a dream you remembered suddenly and then your heart rate picks up and you're heaving something like a panic attack that the reality you live in isn't consistent with this memory you have and you feel kinda crazy and dizzy and then you have to lay down quickly or you faint? 🥹

[dreamerdrop]

look, on a very person level: i have disability related urinary incontinence. i have to wear a pad for this 24/7. it is something i have felt consistently ashamed of most of my life. i spent several years believing that any potential for someone to find me sexually attractive as an adult would be killed off the instant they realised that i have to wear an equivalent to a fucking diaper constantly.

i am not into abdl. i don’t kink on diapers myself. personally, these are both sort of squicks for me.

but hooooooly motherfuck. there are people who do this thing that i am deeply ashamed of *on purpose*. this thing that i thought made me so repugnant that nobody could ever find me sexually viable ever, and they do it *because* they find it sexy. am i supposed to be offended by that? should i be mad that there are people who take something i hate about myself and are having fun with it? because that is very much not the emotion it evokes in me.

it makes me feel *hopeful*. if there are people who do this *deliberately* because they find it *sexy*, then surely, *surely*, it is perfectly reasonable that there are people who will just… view it as entirely neutral too, right? since, clearly, it is not a given that people will find it disgusting and gross as i had spent so much of my life thinking!

and would it really, really be so bad if i had a partner who *did* find it sexy? if they treat me as a human being and respect that i prefer not to have attention drawn to it, is it really the end of the world if they’re quietly turned on by it anyway? does it matter if they find it appealing? having a kink for it isn’t gonna turn an otherwise decent person into a boundary treading monster!

and maybe, maaaaaaybe, maybe i would be happy to know that the thing i find most disgusting about myself is not only *not* an issue for someone, but might even be a free perk of loving me as a whole human beyond that.

[slayerdurge]

Update to whomever it may concern: After a lot of consideration, I decided to delete the chapters I had up so far of my post-ending Durgetash fic. I was in a really bad place mentally when I wrote it (to be entirely honest, I'm two months away from turning 30 and I think I've finally started to realize that my parents were legitimately abusive even though they don't look like the stereotype you learn to expect from television and movies) and I just felt like I did it wrong and I didn't feel like I was going to be able to move forward from that point, so I've decided to scrap it and start over. I'll repost it when I feel like it's actually ready. Sorry to the audience and everyone who bookmarked it and such, I know it's not ideal, but I just felt like it was the best way to deal with it.

I doubt anyone ever remembers my post-ending Cyberpunk fic at this point because I only posted one chapter a year ago and never updated it, but I also deleted it for similar reasons.

[simpingforcys]

Have you ever had the same kind of insane crush on another character like the one you have for KC? If so, what character was the latest to be like that?

So I was actually thinking about this yesterday. The way I fell for King Candy, genuinely I believe borderlines on devotion. Not an obsession or addiction, or a high to get off on. But I think I genuinely, fell in love, with King Candy. Not in a "I need to protect him" or "he's my top favorite, my blorbo, my hyperfixation!" way. More in a kinda, "I would let the world burn for you" kind of way. It's probably not healthy, IDK, but I know when to differ from fictional and real life, but just by glancing at him, hearing his voice, his laugh, even the jingles when he moves, my heart just melts.

As I was telling my friend last night. I've struggle with romantic relationships irl. I've dated but never truly knew if I was able to actually love someone else like a partner should. I came to accept I was incapable of loving someone else romantically. Of course, like anyone else, I had fictional 'crushes' over the years, two were more of a "My son!/My boy!" type of favorite, the most recent being Scarab from Fionna and Cake.

Just something about his voice, his determination, relentless pursuit captivated me so much, I was melting at the sound of his hot voice just 😩 (Doesn't help he's also a bug/turns into a big bug at the end, I swear that wasn't even PLANNED).

Then when I was younger, I had developed such a huge crush on Baxter Stockman from TMNT 2012, and not even his human form, more specifically, his Stockman-Fly form.

He was such a dork and I remember cheering as a kid whenever a character said "Get me Baxter Stockman." And... yes, also a bug. Again, NOT PLANNED. It's a complete coincidence they all share.

I guess my short answer is, no. This was suppose to be short but I ended up rambling. But to be honest, I really don't think I mind. It feels weird, but I don't think I mind feeling like I'll never love another person the same way I love King Candy. I fantasize about him, fawn over him, want to appreciate every aspect and detail and trait of him. I just adore him. In every aspect of the word.

[ohithankyou]

lesbian sex lesbiab sex les

[3416]

as a chronically depressed person, i know saying i'm going to kill myself in reaction to minor things that shouldn't affect my life as much as they do is like. not a helpful thing at all and yet. sometimes it's the only–––

[evil-jennifer-hamilton-wb]

Excessive amounts of fiber (eating the daily recommended calorie allotment in nothing but carrots)

Pretty awful constipation from the iron i need to take for the anemia

And my very normal and very healthy 8 liters of water a day

All coming together to create actually tolerable GI movement! Unusual behavior for my body for sure.

(It won't last though, I'm only on the carrot and canned vegetable diet because I'm out of money and out of food at my apartment. Once I get paid I'll finally get to experience protein again what a wonderful day that will be)

[risingshards]

Sting's final match was so so SO perfect. For the guy who'd always lose when asked and got booked to be such a goober over his career and got such a shitshow wwe run...to see that guy get such a triumphant good defeats evil close to his career, to see him get an undefeated streak in aew....ugh. It's wondeful.

Sting is a wrestler that's really important to me. I didn't watch in like peak 90s wrestling times, but I remember when my brother made a CAW of Sting in HCTP that my 10 year old self was like "that is the coolest wrestler ever." and it took until TNA in january 2006 when he debuted on final resolution, the first wrestling ppv I ever convinced my family to order teaming with my all time #1 wrestler Christian Cage (ty to christian for being genuinely such a nice person to me) for me to be like "oh my god stings fucking awesome?!?!"

In 2014 I had a really shitty life situation. and it fucked me up and I was rocked completely and lost. And I retreated to my partner's house at the time and wrapped myself up in blankets and put on survivor series and sting showed up in wwe. and in all the maelstrom of my life i got to escape for a second and be like. "ok. sting is here. things will be okay. justice will be served." and that was incredibly comforting to me. sting's wwe run endied up being fucking terrible and like my thirtieth "oh god wwe sucks and is horrific for my mental wellbeing" thing. but that debut pulled me away from the bad times.

flash forward to 2020. and the shitty life situation repeated itself like shot for shot. i was lost again. and wouldn't you know it, sting debuts in aew like a day after it happened. and i got to escape again. justice would be served. the good guys win in the end. thankfully, sting's aew run would be so much better than the wwe one and was so so perfect.

so today's very emotional for me. a maybe childish (?) part of me is like "if that thing happens again what do we do if sting doesnt show up and make it feel alright?" but the way sting got to defeat the bad guys one more time, to fight against evil (against the young bucks who were deliciously perfect villains for sting and darby) and to WIN, to not go out like old yeller like every other wrestler retirement angle, is so important to me. sting go to be a fucking real life superhero fighting against evil in the wacky unreal world of wrestling, and helped me through the bullshit, and makes me want to keep fighting in spite of everything. wrestling is silly and weird and seen as fucking stupid bullshit to many who don't watch, but fucking hell I dunno if i'd be here without it, and without people like sting being those kinds of heroes who make the fight worth it. so thank you sting, for everything.

[submissivekillers]

billy and/or stu for 17 period sex?

day 17: period sex - billy loomis + stu macher

on it 🅱️oss 🫡

[foliverfalls]

I LOVE TECH.

I LOVE BENNY SOUTHSTREET.

I LOVE THE ACTOR OF BENNY.

I LOVE HER.

[tvsoftboi]

Packaged, instant hot cocoa mix is the work of dark magics and/or Satan. I had one and I keep fucking pissing

[alienatedpixels]

I ATE CHEESE IM LACTOSE INTOLERANT

THIS IS THE END 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

[bearjam]

There’s nothing more masculine than having to figure out how to wear a pad and a packer at the same time

[lestcat-de-lioncourt]

The greatest thing about having the same haircolour as Reid, bbygurl and I even got matching muffs. And considering how much Lestat throws his clothes off, I'm gonna need it. IM SORRY. I BURST OUT LAUGHING like snap, wild. Also, REPRESENT.