#HOW AM I JUST HEARING THIS

[burnt-toast-life]

Everyone leave me alone right now

[aueua]

people with siblings: how do you feel about them?

[giantkillerjack]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

[arsenicflame]

Bonus round! Do you use a queue tag?

[dizzybizz]

"this is regrettably the best kiss of your life, you understand?"

[butchjesus]

ok but for real now. since tiktok has so throughly disappointed on this trend. who is your strangest hear me out / most bizarre crush? freaks and headscratchers only edition

[maddymoreau]

Thinking about how Diavolo’s feelings transcend time and how in the Nightbringer UR+ card Demon Lord’s Castle Tour this conversation happens.

When asked, “Do you wish to see your father?”

Diavolo responds:

“I suppose I do . . .” isn’t the typical reaction to how a child would feel about wanting to see their parent. Especially when said parent has essentially been in a coma for a year.

Along with how Diavolo describe his father.

It makes more sense why when you learn in Lesson 56 how Diavolo was treated by him growing up.

Diavolo can tell when others are lying but is unable to understand his father’s intentions.

Diavolo mentions that he lived a very sheltered life growing up. That from a young age his father never allowed him a chance to talk to anyone outside the castle.

His childhood friend was Mephistopheles. A demon literally RAISED to be his friend. Putting a barrier between the two because Mephistopheles would put Diavolo on a pedestal.

The isolating childhood he experienced riddled with his strict father constantly scolding him.

Despite everything MC is so important to him he wants to see his father again so we can meet.

[beanghostprincess]

I want to be poetic and say something about fate and religious imagery and Zolu being soulmates but right now I can't stop thinking about how homoerotic this whole scene feels and how bad they wanted to make out sloppy style from the second they met

[blue-mood-blue]

I can pinpoint the moment that destroyed my life today:

It’s been a handful of weeks since Murderbot came within inches of having a new, organic governor module implanted in its head via infection - do you think, maybe, that’s also been hiding behind the redacted? Not the way everything else is, just as a deep-seated reminder of what it can’t afford to lose?

What a way to be told “I love you” - to be told “I will not lose you, I will not let go, I will do the hard part of holding on even if you don’t want me to”

[laurents-secret-diary]

oh damen we're really in it now.mp4

[corseque]

I made a voice comparison to the new line in the new Instagram short.

[dangoulains-devotion]

you mustn't blame yourself

[fireladybuckley]

I can’t believe a boyfriend made a silly sex joke to lighten the mood after both partners had a moment of vulnerability. The audacity. The horror. The normalcy! Unbelievable. How dare a conversation about feelings turn to levity. How dare a couple have a light chat about trauma-related things over dinner that doesn’t turn into an incredibly deep heart to heart instead of a joke and moving on. Unbelievable. I’m never watching this show again! 👎🏻

[kinstein-art]

sanji's weird

[theladyyavilee]

after thinking about it all day now I am insane enough to make it into an actual post, sorry for just copypasting my own tags, but alas xD

this was in response to this post about how buck probably didn't even realize at first how close tommy and he were standing, because him and eddie always stand this close which SO FUCKING TRUE, I just spiralled a little frome there

#but do you also think that NOW the next time he DOES stand this close to eddie he will notice?#DO YOU THINK NOW THAT HE KNOWS HOW CLOSE CLOSE IS AND HOW EASY IT IS TO BRIDGE THAT DISTANCE#HE WILL ALWAYS ALWAYS ALWAYS BE AWARE OF EDDIE BEING THIS CLOSE TOO AND HAVE A TINY PART OF HIMSELF WAITING FOR EDDIE TO REACH IN THE SAME#WAY TOMMY DID BECAUSE REALLY ISN'T THAT THE LOGICAL CONCLUSION TO EASY CLOSENESS LIKE THIS#and like *screams into hands some more* WE KNOW that eddie steps in super close next episode#we know he touches buck#and it isn't the chin it is his shoulder and hip#but really that only makes it more insane#and maybe eddie isn't thinking anything of it because they HAVE always done this THIS IS WHAT THEY DO#they have always stepped close and sought out each other's bodies and touched and just generally had a pull towards each other#but on god I cannot see a world where now buck isn't aware of it in a totally new way#do you think eddie steps close and reaches out to touch him and buck flashes back to tommy stepping close#do you think the feeling of fingers on his chin and fingers on his neck start to blur?#do you think he feels eddie's grip on his hip and for just a second he wonders if there is gonna be a pull that pulls him in unexpectedly#the way that tommy gently pulled his chin towards him? how it was both unexpected and something that he had secretly deep down been hoping#for and been TRYING to provoke by stepping closer himself by swaying closer by stepping in#do you think that for just a moment all of these things blur for buck?#and that has never happened before but HOW are you supposed to ever forget now that you have these new associations#and you have to realize that oh maybe they are not so different from what I have always had#how do you deal with that? with how suddenly suddenly something you have always had has this new meaning and you can't unsee it#but you also can't have it and you have to lock that down because with tommy it already felt like risking everything but in an exhilarting#way#but like this? oh like this the risk is TERRIFYING

the more I am thinking about this the more insane I am feeling? because then I remembered that in the stills from 7x5 we know Eddie has his hand on Buck's side from the way the fabric pulls and EDDIE NEVER TOUCHES BUCK LIKE THAT, he usually only does the shoulder grab! which by itself is insane enough

BUT

BUT THEN

we know from the 7x4 stills that even though we did not quite see it in the episode because of the use of close-ups, tommy too had his hand on Buck's side during the kiss/in the aftermath of the kiss, THE SAME HAND ON THE SAME SIDE VERY LIKELY IN THE SAME SPOT

like? WHAT AM I SUPPOSED TO DO WITH THIS KNOWLEDGE OTHER THAN SCREAM?

the fact that they have eddie touch him like this specifically after tommy touched him like this, when he normally doesn't do that? making Eddie mirror Tommy's touch? FUCKING INSANITY

OF COURSE it'll blurr in buck's mind for just a second, there really is no way it doesn't, sensory memory is SO INSANELY STRONG, oh I am going fully insane over this

[turtleblogatlast]

[ cw: dismemberment / ]

I think a lot about how Leo’s rescue could have easily ended in him losing a leg as the portal snaps shut on the Krang still clutching the limb, or, alternatively, only having Leo’s right arm make it out, still held dearly in his brother’s hand as the rest of Leo is left behind. (The latter hits even harder, as it directly parallels his future self in the worst of ways.)

I think a lot about how so many things could have gone wrong during the course of the movie with even a little bit of a change, but it really is harrowing how much of a coin-flip the entirety of the Prison Dimension rescue was.