#He might also have autism because there's a lot of overlap there

[descendant-of-truth]

Honestly? So much of Sonic Prime happens the way it does because Sonic is unabashedly, wholeheartedly neurodivergent, and I wanna talk about that in detail for several reasons

I think most people assume he has ADHD, and while I agree, I think they tend to leave it at "he's hyperactive and impulsive" when there's actually a lot more going on there.

For example, he lacks a filter. He says exactly what he's thinking, all the time, regardless of who's listening. I wouldn't be surprised if he does it as a type of vocal stim, considering that he talks to himself as much as he does to other people. Maybe he dislikes the way silence feels on his ears, too?

Something I noticed was that when Thorn gets on his case for this, asking if he ever stops talking, the way he says "eh, not really" sounds... almost resigned?

He could have easily said it in a more jokey way, but his tone (and the wide camera shot) gives me the impression that this isn't a trait of his that he feels especially positive about.

It's not cool or funny to him, at least not in this instance; it's just something he does, which further proves to me that it's more of an unconscious stim than anything else.

On the topic of the jungle world though, it also shows us a couple instances of him not being able to read others' intentions very well. Prim lies to him about knowing what the Prism shard is, and Thorn uses him to get to said shard - and despite how hostile they are, he takes both of them at their word.

He only realizes Thorn's intentions after she hits him across the clearing - not for the first time that day, mind you - and Sonic berates himself a little for not seeing this coming.

But it's not like this is the only time he has difficulty understanding intent; just look at his interactions with Shadow.

This is not the behavior of someone who understands why Shadow's picking a fight with him. He doesn't understand the implications of "you literally shook the world" because he doesn't know about the Weirder aspects of the explosion. In his mind, he just messed up a mountain.

Though I think his attitude implies another thing about his dynamic with Shadow that might explain why he was so quick to dismiss what he was talking about, which is. I don't think Sonic usually understands why they fight??

Shadow is a person of few words and Sonic has a hard time picking up on subtleties, that's a recipe for miscommunication already. And if Sonic's already predisposed to thinking that Shadow fights him Just Because, then of course he didn't take this particular instance seriously.

Though going back to "he only registered the physical effect of the explosion," Sonic is actually pretty consistent with understanding things that are tangible a lot better than anything else. Case in point: that One Palm Tree

His first reaction to seeing it presented as a gift is that it must be a trick. because he doesn't see the tangible point of the tree, and isn't enough of a symbolism guy to see the sentimental point of it, either.

Don't get me wrong, he is being insensitive here, but I don't think it's on purpose in any way. Look at his body language and expressions:

Even as he's getting on their case for being too sentimental, he's not unhappy or uncomfortable with them. He's just completely failing to recognize that this was supposed to be a big deal for them, so he's treating it way more casually than is appropriate.

Which is like. a classic social flub for neurodivergent folks

(Quick side note - this specific "huh" that he makes as Tails is flying away before Sonic realizes he's upset is a whole mood. I don't know how to explain it but this is Exactly what it feels like when you can sorta tell something's not clicking but you don't know what yet)

(Look at him. brain static)

I could go on with the detailed explanations but some of that would just be me repeating past posts I've made, so I'll leave it at "he is clearly not handling change well either" and link back to an example.

So anyway, this is what I meant when I said that so much of the show is impacted by Sonic being neurodivergent. It affects how we hear his thoughts as viewers, it affects his ability to understand and connect with his friends, it's why he dismisses Shadow, it's why he impulsively smashes the Paradox Prism, the list goes on.

And he's not stupid because of any of these traits, either. None of what I've described has to do with intelligence, but I've seen "Sonic is too dumb" as a reason to criticize the show, and that's just not what's happening here.

If anything, I'm actually really impressed with how well the writers have managed to portray a more nuanced take on what a character with ADHD would look like. Because he's not just being hyperactive and chatty, you can tell it affects how he perceives things too.

Which is a much bigger part of the overall experience, and it's really cool to see in a cartoon like this - and in the lovable main character, to boot! Who cherishes his friends despite his struggles to understand them! Why is it so good!

In conclusion Sonic is the ADHD king we both needed and deserved, thanks for coming to my TED talk

[sciderman]

I swear I have read your big post regarding Peter Parker's neurodivergence and why it is best to avoid labelling him, but he definitely has a weird brain

Can't find it and feel kinda sad about it cuz I deeply related to it

i know exactly which post you're talking about and i can't find it either! i've raked through my archive, and it's just - nowhere to be seen. i think tumblr eated it (it happens.)

really, tumblr's search functionality is so so useless, i don't know what to tell you. there are plenty of keywords i can search to find it that post, but the search functionality actually just does not work!

undiagnosed audhd-addled peter parker, my darling, my light, my life, my everything.

i think peter parker's such an interesting creature to write, because a lot of people will point to a certain behaviour about him and say "this is an autistic thing, right?" but a lot of those behaviours are actually, in my head, tied to certain traumas in peter's life too.

people say "oh, the food thing, peter's a picky eater because he's autistic" and yes, absolutely. but also it's tied to his trauma with his parents.

peter gets overstimulated, and yes, it's an autism thing, but also he was bitten by a radioactive spider and his senses are dialled to 11.

it's a similar case i've found for myself, too – where a lot of friends i have kind of diagnose me because i have autistic traits, but actually - i'm hesitant to claim the label or pursue diagnosis because, actually, i know where these certain behaviours come from, and they come from certain traumas. there are events i can pinpoint in my life and say "yep. that's where this behaviour comes from."

so - i think there's a lot of overlap between trauma and autistic traits. the brain is very complex! i think the reason for that overlap is maybe as simple as the fact that people with autism and people with trauma are both doing the same thing - developing behaviours to protect themselves or soothe themselves. so - i think it's nice to be able to see a character like peter parker, who may or may not be autistic, but recognise behaviours in him and see yourself in him.

people who go undiagnosed for whatever reason - people who are really good at masking - so good, in fact, that they have no idea they might be on the spectrum - everyone and anyone at all can look at peter parker and recognise themselves. because i think we discredit the thought that every single brain does the same thing! develops certain behaviours in order to survive. every brain has that same software - we've just all been faced with different hardships that we need to overcome, and that's were all the differences come in.

autism is a spectrum, i guess - everyone falls into it to some degree. and i think events in your life probably push you along on it. but i don't know, i didn't study brain science. probably what i'm saying is very stupid and uninformed. of course there's brain chemistry involved. but i know people in my life living with autism and certain events in their life have exacerbated certain behaviours or made coping with it a lot more difficult. so maybe trauma is a catalyst.

[nottapossum]

do you think Lucifer has autism or adhd or both? I know that man isn’t neurotypical….

Def ADHD coded.

I think he got the ADHD.

The DAVE /Ref

(Gawd fucking damn it dave.)

And I for one plan on writing him as such. Lol

Love writing Neurodivergent kiddos! ✍️

There are a lot of symptoms that overlap when it comes to autism and ADHD, specifically the ones the king has:

-Rejection sensitivity

- Social challenges

-impulsivity

I personally think Lucifer has ADHD and Social anxiety.

He wants to be social and loves being around people! But he constantly worries about being judged by doing and saying the wrong things, that it becomes very stressful to do so...

And then he avoids social interaction because of it.

He needs a hug! And a fidget spinner.

And these pop-its

And this really cool duck game!

And and and! These!

He's the Ducky king! 🐤

Heheh.

I collect ducktales figurines! I relate a lot to Lucifer!

...I might be ADHD too...idk.

Oh! I Also I have another post about this! >Here<

@todayimfour @trophyxtissues2 @ask-dusty-boy @dex-dawn @abby5577

[skylarsblue]

billy loomis / stu macher x reader with autism? tysm! and if you can’t do it no worries ^^

(Autism gang, let's go! Also, I added Danny for my own enjoyment, forgive me.)

✦Ghostfaces With a S/O That's Autistic✦

✦Content; No warnings that I can think of, fluff, GN!Reader with nothing specified physically✦ ✦Stu; He/Him, Billy; He/Him, Danny; He/They✦

✧Stu Macher✧

I'm fairly certain Stu is neurodivergent, ADHD specifically. You look at this man and tell me he has a neurotypical brain, I dare you. Yeah, no, you can't.

Now given this is 1995-1996, the concept of people having ADHD & Autism wasn't super accepted. Honestly, people treated it like a devastating blow most of the time. (Sadly, not a whole lot has changed) I imagine Stu doesn't really understand what being neurodivergent really means. Like, he knows what autism is, but he's got a bit of a warped view of what it means for you. You can blame media for the majority of it, but don't worry! He's not gonna go Anti-Vax Mom™ on yo ass.

He'll actually listen to you, even if he doesn't fully understand. You'll have to break it to him that Autism isn't a life-destroying thing. It just means you process things a bit differently, have sensitivities, etc. He'll grab the concept pretty quickly.

When you explain stuff like sensory processing issues, he'll actually relate really hard. Stu's lived his whole life thinking he was just weird for his reactions to certain stimuli, but when you describe your own experiences, it makes him question.

Bringing up that he might have ADHD won't make him want to get tested, he doesn't see a need, it won't change anything about him and he's not huge on the idea of medications. But, he will ask you more questions. Autism & ADHD are different but they do have a decent amount of overlap and you know more than he does so he trusts your judgment.

"Wait is that why I feel like I wanna tear my skin off when I feel velvet?! ...YOU MEAN NOT EVERYONE HEARS ELECTRICITY? IT'S JUST US?!"

Mans has an epiphany every five seconds while you're talking.

When it comes to him helping you, he tries his best, but he's spacey and forgets certain things. Still, he does his best to keep it all in mind. If he knows there's one food you absolutely can't stand, he'll keep it off your plate. Even if it means scraping it all onto his own and making a mess.

Is there a sound that makes it feel like your head's about to explode? He'll cover your ears, put his head on your head/shoulder and hum something.

Sometimes, if you two share a sensitivity, he'll loudly express his hatred for it and insist you both leave/get rid of whatever's causing it.

Has probably broken something that was making a noise you both hated. "Ugh, finally. Look, see? Problem solved! Aren't I a genius, babe?"

Stu absolutely understands the consumption of hyperfixations and he supports you completely. If it's something he can't get into, sometimes he comes across a bit aloof to it, because it doesn't give his brain the dopamine rush it does for you. Still, he's glad you have something you enjoy and he'll still listen to your rants. As long as you do the same for him.

If you both are hyperfixating on the same thing at the same thing? Bro, y'all annoy the shit out of everyone and he does not give a single fuck.

If anyone makes you feel like shit for talking about it, he's gonna rip them a new one. He makes fun of their biggest insecurities if he feels they deserve it. Is it cruel? Yes, but he, doesn't, care. If you don't wanna feel his wrath, you sit there and listen intently to his baby's ramblings, damnit.

Stu's a pretty intense dude and he likes a lot of stimulation. But he understands if you get overwhelmed sometimes. His tolerance for lots of stuff going on is a lot higher than most people. Again, he'll cover your ears if it's a lot of noise. He'll cover your eyes if it's too much visual stimuli, keep you close to his body in a crowd. This also helps if you're shorter than him because he can surround you completely, helps feel like you're disconnected from the stressors around you.

He's hella rich, he'll get you all the fidget toys you want. All the shit you want for a hyperfixation. Best believe you get the best headphones and music player the market has to offer for those times you need to drown shit out.

He's a touchy-feely person and he's likely to forget your physical boundaries sometimes if touch is a problem for you. But he'll always apologize when you correct him. If touch isn't a problem, he's super cuddly. And if you're the type to be only okay with touch from specific people, he gets a huge ego boost from being that person.

He's a bit boney & fidgety but makes a decent human blanket.

An overall 10/10 for a Neurodivergent Partner.

✧Billy Loomis✧

I'm gonna be real with you, chief. He's not the best. He's not terrible! But not the best. I'm not saying he's gonna bully you for the things you do, no, he's an overall sweet partner in all honesty. He's patient and understanding.

Still, if he doesn't understand a thing you're doing, he might come across a bit annoyed. Like if you have an audible stim that you keep repeating, his tone comes across a bit snappy when he asks why you do it. He's not trying to upset you, his temper's just a bit shaky.

Sitting him down and explaining that you're autistic might get you a few annoying questions. He's not an asshole, he means well, but the questions come across rude. Ex; "But you don't act autistic.", "But you do (insert stereotypical thing).", etc. If you tell him that most of the stuff he knows is basically all poor representation and rumors, he'll give you a pretty basic apology and he'll stop. Billy will also ask what else is a result of shitty ideas of autism so he knows better. (You'll need to tell him that the R-word is a slur. He doesn't really use it but it's good for him to be aware.)

I personally see Billy as neurotypical, but he's been friends with Stu for a long time. If you have behaviors that overlap with Stu's, he'll handle it perfectly. He's a veteran at it.

Sometimes he'll think you're being a bit too sensitive about sensory stimuli, but when you explain it's not just that you dislike something, he'll be more willing to understand.

"It's just a bit of corn, it's not that bad." "Billy, when I bite into a single kernel, it triggers my fight or flight response, my body goes into panic mode, and I wanna tear my hair out and throw up. It is that bad." "...oh. Aight, here, trade me."

When it comes to overstimulation caused by stuff like noise and people, he actually understands. He's an introvert and large crowds exhaust him, which makes him irritable. If he sees you starting to get antsy and uncomfortable in a loud environment, he'll give you his walkman headphones and find a reason for you both to leave. He's excellent at manipulation, he'll find a way.

If you have skin sensitivity, he'll start keeping things on him that help alleviates it. Scissors to cut tags out of your clothes, a spare shirt(that's his because he totally has a kink for that), hand sanitizer, etc.

Best believe he's ready to throw hands with anyone who gives you shit. He will whoop ass, no hesitation. Billy's a very possessive & protective partner most of the time, he's ready to defend your honor at the drop of a hat.

He's got his hobbies and likes, but he doesn't have anything he'd consider a hyperfixation. Still, he'll be perfectly happy for you that you've found one. Sometimes he has to ask you to stop talking when you're rambling about it, but he learned after the first two times to specify it wasn't personal. He just needs quiet every now and then and he knows you'll get sad if he isn't actually listening to you.

Like Stu, he'll be very happy if your hyperfixation has anything to do with his own interests. Billy will actually be impressed if you know more niche facts and nuances than he is, this is often the easiest way to hold his attention when you're in a long info-dump.

He's not as rich as Stu, but he's got some decent money, plus a part-time job. His spare money will definitely be spent on your interests, no matter what it is. It could be a hyper-specific brand of toys and he'll buy the most expensive one they offer. He wants you to be happy! (And the terrible part of him wants to have the leverage to keep you loyal to him, no matter how terrible his actions get)

Despite his struggle to understand sensory processing disorder, he actually offers some pretty decent suggestions to get around it. Using myself as an example, I often struggle to brush my teeth because it'll feel like bugs are in my teeth. If you had something like this, he'd come up with a potential solution on the spot. "What if you brushed them in the shower? That way you can focus more on the water than the brushing."

Again, similarities between you and Stu will catch his attention and he'll make a mental note of it. One, he'll see if he can use his experience with Stu to handle your symptoms better. Two, he'll definitely consider asking you if Stu's neurodivergent.

Not the best, but he's trying his best. Solid 7/10.

✧Danny Johnson✧

ANOTHER NEURODIVERGENT.

I headcanon that Danny has AuDHD, which is both Autism & ADHD. Once he was diagnosed (well into his twenties), it was like they had opened pandora's box. Researching it made them go "OHH THAT'S WHY" every five seconds.

He grew up in rural Utah with a shitty dad who would definitely not treat Danny well if he knew about his son's neurodivergence. But that doesn't matter cause the bastard's dead. Letting Danny have the freedom to research the topic to his heart's content, which he does. It helped them immensely in terms of lifestyle.

When you come into his life and explain that you're autistic, he's completely accepting right off the bat. That's also assuming he wasn't stalking you for months prior to your relationship and that he didn't already know to begin with.

He's probably the most equipped to handle things like sensory overload & sensitivities, given he has so many himself. He's also, ironically enough, got the most patience for things like stims & info-dumping. Danny's a tempermental hypocrite but on this list he's the most chill with these things, funny eh?

They absolutely pick up on some of your stims and you pick up on his. It makes them so much worse, but it's cute. His main stims involve his hands and little sounds with his mouth, like whistling or humming.

Your food sensitivities don't need to be explained to him, he's got a million. It's aggravating because he wants to be a foodie so bad but then they have all these damn sensory problems. If a single piece of broccoli will ruin your entire meal, broccoli will be essentially banned from the house. He's a romantic like that.

Pre-cuts tags from your clothes, picks out things from pre-made meals that you hate before he even gives it to you, has a plethora of scented candles you like to cover up troublesome smells, and he's got a million versions of headphones/earbuds. They all work he just loses them constantly, buys more, then finds the originals again. Honestly, they have a whole drawer dedicated to music players.

Your ability to stick to a schedule helps out with his ADHD experience. He's got a pretty decent routine himself, but sometimes he'll fuck it up and find it hard to get back on track. For example, they've misplaced their meds and it's fucking up their whole morning? There you are with the correction and they're back on track. He'll jokingly call you a saint for it.

Sometimes his temper gets touchy and he'll get snappy at something you do. (This is more a general thing and less an Autistic thing) He gets real guilty when you look at him with sadness and quickly apologizes. Which is baffling, given they were pretty sure they were incapable of guilt for a long time.

"I'm sorry, sorry, it's not you. Not mad at you. Mad at this other thing, it's not personal, doll, sorry."

If you're overstimulated, Danny's got you covered, rest assured. He's got earbuds, at least three fidget toys, and he's always ready to give you comforting pressure. Whether it's by acting like a weighted blanket or a tight hug. They also really appreciate when you return the favor when they've had a bad day at work.

They get a huge ego boost if you consider him your main comfort, or if your comfort object is something of his. Like a gift they gave you or some article of their clothing.

Actively researches your hyperfixation so he can engage in conversation with you about it. They like seeing you get all excited when they bring it up. Most of the time, he ends up having a hyperfixation on it as well. If you do the same for him? You're asking for a cuddly bitch of a man.

Feels their cold heart melt when you do something to help their AuDHD. Remembering his safe foods, his fidgets, etc. If he wasn't obsessed before, he is now.

Anyone who gives you shit for being autistic is dead by morning, that's a basic rule. If you defend him against bullshit? He's fucking the shit out of you.(/hj)

Considers you a hyperfixation, honestly.

100/10, you caught a winner with Danny. If you don't mind obsessive behavior, possessiveness, and murder. But c'mon. You're here. Of course, you don't mind.

[katboykirby]

As someone with autism, Satan with an autistic MC would be so wholesome and perfect...

Satan who makes sure a MC always has a jacket and a spare pair of plastic gloves handy to help them with their sensory issues.

Satan who takes over some of autistic MC’s chores, cleaning the dirty dishes and dealing with leftovers so that MC doesn’t freak out when they have to touch it.

Satan who never leaves MC’s side at large gatherings lest they get overstimulated and run off again. The last time that happened it took everyone so long to find them. Luckily, MC was alright. They were tucked away in a small room in the castle to hide.

Satan who is perfectly alright with sitting silently in your room while the two of you work on your own things. Maayyybeee he wouldn’t mind it if you wanted to scoot closer to him.

DOESN’T LET DIFFERENT FOODS TOUCH ON YOUR PLATE!! WILL START A RIOT IF HE FINDS THAT ANYONE HAS LET FOODS TOUCH ON YOUR PLATE!!

…ahem

Satan who doesn’t find MC’s tendency to disappear without a trace frustrating. He knows they like to go ‘exploring’ alone, wandering off for a short while before returning to his side per usual. Maybe when you grow close enough you’ll take him on a little journey.

Satan who admires you and your love for certain things. No matter how trivial they may seem, he knows that those are the things that make up the world for you. He’ll gladly listen to you talk about your interests for hours.

Satan who takes your relationship as slow as you may need. Sexual intimacy doesn’t equal love to him. He’s okay with you touching him and not the other way around if that’s what you feel comfortable with.

Satan who seems to be the only one who understands MC’s reluctance to physical touch. He avoids touching MC whenever possible. He shows his affection for MC in other ways.

Taking them to a quiet cat café.

Taking them to a new pop up event for their favorite anime.

Hell, he even downloaded Mononoke Land so that when they went on walks together he could catch spirits alongside them. (He’s their only added friend on the game so he makes sure to send them gifts daily.)

When MC shyly hugs him for the first time he thinks he might combust on the spot— it’s such a special occasion for him!

You think you’re a burden and nuisance because you’re so different, yet to Satan, that’s what makes you so perfect. It’s what makes him love you so much.

(p.s,,, if it wouldn’t bother you I could be 💚anon or bitchass autistic anon! I don’t know if you label your anons or not. :) )

((also don’t feel pressured to respond or look at this ask! I just thought you might like it.))

This is so, so lovely and I really enjoyed reading all of your thoughts. And nobody has asked to be a tagged Anon before! Of course you can be 💚 Anon!

I feel like I don't have very much to say in response, because you've already put everything into words so wonderfully. I'm not autistic myself, but I know that there's some overlap with ADHD (my own diagnosis) when it comes to certain habits or behaviours, and I do some of the things that you've described so I feel like I can relate to a certain extent.

I do think that all of the OM boys would be supportive of an autistic partner (or any of the personal struggles that their partner might have, be they mental or physical) but I do also believe that Satan would be one of the best at intuitively knowing exactly what his partner wants and needs without having to ask for anything to be explained or spelled out for him.

Whether you HC Satan as autistic or not, he does have a lot of his own habits and behaviours that are somewhat similar, and he's good at figuring things out on his own even from very small or subtle hints.

If he sees you carefully separating the different foods on your plate (something many of his brothers would be too loud or rowdy during mealtimes to notice right away) he would make sure to keep your food clearly separated the next time it was his turn to make dinner, and would make sure to separate your food every time in the future as well.

If he notices the way you gently (or not-so-gently) pull away from physical contact, he will always be sure to refrain from touching you without your explicit permission; something that his other brothers (like Mammon, Asmo, or Beel, for example) might take longer to figure out, since they're just so used to hugging you or putting an arm around you without even thinking about it. Satan isn't the biggest fan of all the touchy-feely stuff either (we often see him yelling at his brothers not to touch him in the games) so he knows how you feel, and he doesn't want to intrude on your personal space.

He loves that you always listen to him whenever he has something to say, especially when he starts gushing at length about the current book he's reading or about the cat he saw on his way from from RAD that day. Nobody else really bothers to pay him any attention when he starts rambling like that - Levi is really the only one who can relate, but Levi also has trouble keeping himself from interrupting and going into his own long spiels. And Satan loves listening to you when you tell him all about your own hyperfixations in turn. It doesn't matter what you're rambling about, Satan is hanging on to every word.

Satan is a very meticulous person who would take his time to deeply and carefully consider all of the best ways he could support you and make you feel comfortable, without making you feel patronised or condescend to. He'd never want to make you feel like a child he was taking care of, because you are both perfectly equal in his eyes. He knows what it feels like to be seen as less than, thanks to many years of hinself only ever being seen as his rage. He never wants you to feel like just a diagnosis or just a disability. Like his Wrath, your autism is a part of you, but it is not all of you. It is not your entire identity or all that you are.

He loves you so, so much ♡

[mrmallard]

So with my James Somerton post yesterday, I expressed how miserable it all made me feel. The constant plagiarism and the weaponization of his fanbase is such a fucked up thing, especially now we know that he was covering for his own wrongdoing by harassing people who came across it. HBomberGuy seemed pretty miserable by the end; he made a pertinent point about how many people were overshadowed by Somerton's actions, and the lengths he took to steal their hard work and pass it off as his own. For a man who claimed to care so much about the erasure of queer men through history, he did a lot of fucking erasure of his own, including against gay men and their contributions to culture. It's a really fucked up and depressing thing. I don't have the heart to meme about it.

That's not me going "memeing about James Somerton is bad, think of the victims!" - that's just me describing my own perspective. I already feel like I have the weight of the world on my shoulders. I don't need to steep myself in all that right now - but anyone else can meme away.

The main concern I have after seeing that video and hearing about everything that's happened is how to rebuild. There's been a great wrong committed. How do we try to fix that and make it right? I think it was good for HBomberGuy to not only split his ad revenue proportionally between the victims of everyone's plagiarism, but to highlight other queer youtubers - some of them victims of Somerton's theft, others not. Personally, I'd like to do that too, because I really like their work and it's something I can do to try and make a tangible difference.

For my money, I want to highlight Alexander Avila, Lola Sebastian and Kat Blaque. Much like what I saw of Somerton's output, I saw them mostly through third-party apps with pop-up windows on touchscreen devices (Pi Music Player, and then NewPipe).

---

I think the first Alex Avila video I saw was "Why Can't Celebrities Queerbait?". To my recollection, it was a video that began with some recent news about a young actor who was criticized for playing a gay character in a TV show, to the point of being bullied into coming out as bisexual before he was ready. Another example was the woman who wrote the novel that "Love, Simon" was based on, which has an unfortunate overlap with James Somerton's wrongdoings.

The core of the video is about the misuse of "queerbaiting" to refer to a celebrity "appropriating" queerness, when queerbaiting is a media term for when a queer ship is dangled in front of a receptive audience only to be yanked back to keep the audience hungry for more. And Alex gives examples of this, the largest example being Teen Wolf. It's an extremely well-made video, and I thought Alex made a great point about how you really don't know a person's sexuality until they spell it out themselves. It's been a while and I might be misremembering this, so take this with a grain of salt, but I also remember a point about how bullying people out of the closet isn't the diversity win that some people think it is.

He also has an incredible video about how he was a transgender child, growing up into a transgender man. idk if this is a weird thing to say, but it's an absolute must-watch video. The video he released after that is another really good one, it's the one that HBomberGuy pointed out - it's called "TikTok Gave Me Autism: the Politics of Self-Diagnosis", and it's an incredible, poignant video that taught me a lot about the continuing stigma towards neurodivergency and the backlash against both neurodivergency and self-diagnosis through a proxy backlash towards modern social media.

Apparently, becoming a New Zealand citizen is next to impossible if you have an autism diagnosis - I had no idea. My plan was always to try and move to NZ if Australia goes to shit; given my own suspicions about my neurological state, pursuing that could end up turning all my plans to shit.

Another great video essay YouTuber is Lola Sebastian. The first video I saw of hers was a video called "The Absurd Horror of Marge Simpson". I didn't really like it, it's got a lot of like avant-garde bits, but it was good background noise for playing Runescape and it led to me finding a much bigger body of work which I really enjoyed.

She had a video called Problematic Fans which is unlisted now, it's been too long since I've seen it but I remember liking it. I've seen her video about Call Me By Your Name multiple times, it's an incredible breakdown of that movie as well as the stuff about Armie Hammer. More recently, I really enjoyed her video about Bones and All, juxtaposed by the backlash to Twilight's "softening of vampires for the sake of trite romanticism" in its heyday. It does break down Twilight, including its exploitation of the Quileute people, while also discussing a recent movie called Bones and All - a movie that's been review-bombed for, allegedly, being "Twilight but with cannibals". This video is probably the only video I've seen in years that's made me actually want to seek out and watch a movie.

I haven't seen a lot of Kat Blaque's videos lately. I did recently see her breaking down that SunnyV2 video basically shaming MrBeast's transgender friend and saying that MrBeast is gonna fail unless Chris quits the YouTube channel. What I remember the most about her is that she's got a few storytime videos about her dating life, and looking at her channel she does a lot of topical videos about media, the internet and queer issues.

I remember liking Kat Blaque's storytime videos for being personal and open, and she talks about stuff like misogynoir and her experiences as a black trans woman. This isn't a perspective I see often, not as a white Australian guy in my real life or in a broader community of video essayists. Her videos seem to be about half an hour on average, at least her more recent videos - definitely check out her videos and see if you like them, they're a good length and I think she has a lot to say. I'm just sorry I can't go into more detail.

---

My mental health is pretty bad rn. I was running on fumes yesterday and watching over four hours of video content about YouTube plagiarism and James Somerton specifically really fried my brain in a way that I really didn't need. Me saying "I can't deal with the drama behind James Somerton" and all that isn't like a Moral Stance against what's happening - I'm just at my wit's end with everything in the world right now, I don't need to immerse myself in all that right now.

But I've seen what happened, and all that is a part of me now. Probably a very unhealthy way to feel, but I've dipped my toe into it all and this is the conclusion I took away from it.

I don't want to be a part of the cancelling or the tearing down. Does James Somerton deserve backlash, to the point of losing his following? Based on what we've seen, and what I personally believe about the situation, yes. But that side of things isn't my scene. I want to help repair the damage and rebuild what's been lost in the wake of everything that's happened.

And I want to express that while James Somerton, his rampant theft and the negative effects of his actions are trending right now, I think that people who are currently focusing on tearing James Somerton down for what he did should consider joining the effort of building up a base for his victims and for other queer YouTubers - if they haven't already.

Do you have to follow Alex Avila because James Somerton ripped him off, no. Is it recompense for what happened with Somerton, probably not. But I'm recommending Alex Avila because his YouTube videos are really fucking good. I'm recommending the youtubers I recommended because I really like their videos. For any tearing down that's happening right now, I want to rebuild something more positive in its place.

I want people to watch videos like Alexander Avila's video about the politics of self-diagnosis, I want them to see Lola Sebastian's video about Bones and All. I want them to enjoy Kat Blaque's storytime content and - like myself after I finish this post - watch her most recent videos and see how they like them. If you enjoy video essay content, these three channels make really good videos, as do the other YouTubers who HBomberGuy recommended at the end of the video. I want any of my own input in this ugliness, at least past the point that I've already commented, to go towards building people up.

So consider checking out Alexander Avila, Lola Sebastian and Kat Blaque. Also consider checking out Princess Weekes, apologies for the late entry but she does some great videos about media and fandom. Their videos are a great way to fill in the time, and after the dust has settled, I hope they get a bit of a boost in attention if nothing else.

[zebulontheplanet]

Hi i just found your blog n i have a question.. im suspecting im intellectual disabled. Explains a lot of my life n how my brain works.. was also in some sort of special ed program when younger from kindergarten up until 4th grade n struggled with school after that. My bf believes it as well due to how he has to explain lots of things n id still not understand and he needs to walk w me in public so i dont hurt myself by running into the road when its not a good time yet. Could i say how im intellectually disabled when done lots of research n understand? Im 18 n have adhd (was diagnosed) if that helps. I dont know when i can take an iq test too

ty for ur time :]

Hi anon! This is a really good question.

Generally the ID community agrees that people shouldnt self diagnose an intellectual disability.

This is because ID overlaps with a LOT of disorders and can look like a lot of things. Like autism, learning disabilities, brain damage, etc etc.

ID is a complicated disorder. It isn’t something that anyone really wants to have, and because of how complicated it is to have, it generally isn’t something that is self diagnosable.

Because there are different levels of intellectual disability, it’s really hard to self diagnose what exactly you have too and what your IQ is at. For example there is borderline ID, mild ID, moderate ID, severe ID, and profound ID.

If you don’t know what your IQ is, then how are you supposed to know which one you have? You can’t just pick and choose what looks the best for you. They all have unique characteristics of how they affect you. This is figured out through testing.

My say is to not self diagnose and ask for a referral to a neuropsych from your PCP when possible. You could also go through Vocational rehabilitation if you’re in the US. They test for free usually! If you’re genuinely concerned about you having an intellectual disability then that’s ok, you can have that in the back of your mind. However, self diagnosing it isn’t something you should do.

Intellectual disability looks different on everyone. Not one person with an intellectual disability is affected the same or looks the same. So it’s even more impossible to pinpoint if you have an intellectual disability by yourself.

It’s also worth mentioning that if you can, look into your past test records from when you were in special education. Usually testing is done to determine where you are and if you have any disorders, so you might be able to find something there.

I hope this helps, I’m sorry if this isn’t what you wanted to hear but it is true. I hope this clears some things up and if you have anymore questions then let me know!

[pokemenlovingmen]

I've come on my hands and knees begging for some reader loving on some autistic submas, just a reader that loves these boys with all the quirks and hyper fixations included. A reader who understands the need to shake of that excess energy with some good hand flapping and loves to listen to hour long rants about the boys special interests (especially Ingo, that man WILL go on for hours if you let him, bb pls breath)

- 🐗 anon

PLEASE??? I need more positivity loving autism for autism, the good, the bad and the ugly. Sorry if these are a little short, I feel like a lot of headcanons here can overlap so I tried to find the specifics that I could.

Submas with male reader who loves their autistic traits!

Emmet

⚪ - He's happy you never force him to talk! Emmet goes nonverbal pretty frequently, not to say he doesn't want to talk. He wishes he was as verbose as his brother, because he does have a lot to say, but oh well. You always make him feel heard even if he isn't actually making any noise!

⚪ - If you live with him, things might be a little disorganized. He's more of a tactile stimmer and he'll do it with anything. If it isn't nailed down, he'll probably pick it up and start fiddling with it. Don't leave tools out. Usually he'll put those things down himself, though, shaking his head and saying "I am Emmet. And you need to keep this hammer away from me."

⚪ - You're all ears on the rare occasion he does talk a lot, which in a way only excites him more. He talks more and more the progressively more excited he gets and only gets more excited when he glances your way and sees you actually paying attention to him!

⚪ - If you are also an autistic or just generally stimmy person, you'll stim together! If he sees you stimming he'll start too. You're excited, why shouldn't he be, too?

⚪ - The number one most sympathetic person if you also go nv on him. He affords you every ounce of the kindness and respect you give him.

⚪ - He also just appreciates that you like him. Fact of the matter is, you really have to look a certain way, have certain interests, to be an autistic person afforded any respect and kindness. Emmet, and his brother too, neither of them are what people consider "cute" autistic people. He's a white-haired grown man in an elaborate costume with a cheshire smile and bizarre speech patterns. He expects not to be liked, expects not to be taken seriously, but you treat him as an equal and that matters. A lot.

⚪ - You never infantilize him and he's so grateful. Sometimes you need to slow things down in certain areas for him, or ask him to slow down in other spots, and you're always polite about it. You never speak for him, always ask first, and most importantly to Emmet, you never assume he doesn't understand things. He couldn't be happier with a man like you.

Ingo

⚫- You listen to him? You listen to him!! He talks so much, people often check out. But you listen! He's over the moon when you ask him questions about the subways or his favorite Pokemon he's been talking about, because that not only means you're listening, but that you're interested! Questions are his love language, strange as it is, but those tell him what he's saying to you matters.

⚫- He's more prone to external meltdowns than his brother. And you have his constant gratitude for never being embarrassed about him, you swiftly escort him out of places of high stress and are there as he decompresses.

⚫- Ingo is really thankful you don't have any expectations on him to react or even just emote certain ways. Pretty much all of the autistic flat effect got heaped on him and he's spent a lot of time, and I mean a lot of time, stressing about reacting the right way or feeling self conscious about how he's always frowning and people can't tell what he's thinking. But you know Ingo enough to know when he's happy even if his face doesn't say it.

⚫- I think generally he worries he embarrasses you, maybe with his behavior, or his looks, or the way he talks. That being said he always lights up when you reassure him of the contrary. Especially for someone who interacts with so many people on a day-to-day basis, he gets anxious that he looks unapproachable or even a bit ugly, so it means the world to him when you tell him you love his quirky little catlike frown, or the ways his eyes just shine when he's excited even if not much else changes facially.

⚫- Between him and his brother, I think Ingo concerned himself a lot more with masking. Both of them did it, of course, but Emmet is both more confident and he also has the image of "the happy one", so Ingo feels particularly self conscious about his stims. He doesn't do it often, even if you encourage him to relax a bit and not stress himself out about masking. He's masked for so long and so often he's almost ironed out stims from his life completely. That being said he does still stim occasionally, usually hand flapping, and he's glad you don't make a big deal out of it or draw attention to it. Ingo isn't sure he'll ever feel comfortable stimming like his brother can, but around you, it feels normal. And it's nice to feel normal.

⚫- He prefers it if you let him initiate touch, but also appreciates it when you lean into it and reciprocate. He just prefers to initiate, which he's glad you respect, because his touch-positive and touch-averse days come and go sort of at random.

⚫- Even better connections with him will form if some of your special interests overlap! He can indulge and rant for hours and hours and hours if you are there to enjoy his interests with him.

[somekindofsentience]

OCD in Hello Charlotte 3, or why Charles Eyler doesn't (necessarily) have Dissociative Identity Disorder

MAJOR SPOILERS FOR HELLO CHARLOTTE 3

CONTENT WARNING: Discussions of severe mental illness, including intrusive thoughts and psychosis. Please be warned if this may cause you to spiral out of control, and take care of yourself.

DISCLAIMER: A lot of this is coming from my personal experience and understanding of OCD. While I do not experience DID, I don't really focus much on it in this, more reframing Scarlett Eyler as a character. You can take Charles' experiences however you feel is accurate.

I feel like the fandom gets tripped up when Charles calls Scarlett Eyler a tulpa.

I've seen a lot of people state that this quote directly implies Charles has DID, and that's therefore canon. But I'd actually like to propose a different take, that Scarlett is a physical manifestation of Charles' intrusive thoughts.

First of all, a tulpa implies a sense of desire - it is willingly created through spiritual meditation. Scarlett is, in no way, a desired existence that haunts Charles. There is some debate as to whether or not the game was originally in Russian or English, but regardless, tulpa just may be what Charles refers to the phenomenon as. It's not as if this directly confirms anything, as we know in-game Charles is only diagnosed with autism, and takes medication for psychosis.

Charles experiences many symptoms of OCD, contamination OCD in particular. He is intensely preoccupied with purity and disease, insisting that the majority of the population has a "parasite", aside from a select few people (Vincent being one of them, and by the end, the only one).

OCD and psychosis have several unique overlaps when acting as comorbid conditions. It has a relatively high comorbidity, due to both conditions often suffering with heightened paranoia. I couldn't find any research which suggests it can cause the hallucination of intrusive thoughts, but OCD does make people more susceptible to hallucinatory disorders, and vice versa.

Many people with OCD, especially those who have experienced symptoms since being a child, start to conceptualise these thoughts as a being - appearing as imaginary friends which act and react negatively. It definitely happened to me - I genuinely thought I had DID for a year or so of my life, because I had this voice in my head that hated me, and it didn't feel like myself. As a child, it just felt like my own mind was trying to bully me, and I didn't understand why.

We know that Scarlett Eyler is the instigator of "punishment" for Charles' actions...

This sort of "punishing" is very reminiscent of OCD. The rule-breaking itself is confusing to an outsiders, and the punishments even more so. However, I find this rule-and-punishment system very relatable, and I'd argue that some people with OCD might have even more confusing rules and punishments - for example, I can't watch very specific youtube videos, I can't explain what the rules I have surrounding them are, and I have strange punishments for this (that which I will not disclose).

Scarlett also doesn't exhibit typical alter behaviour. She never takes over, Charles doesn't seem to lose time, she does little more than act as a harsh observer, and also physically threaten Charles. She seems very real to him, aside from the fact that he knows taking pills will make her "disappear".

For Charles, Scarlett is simply a being who threatens and instigates intrusive thoughts, but in a particular way. Charles still experiences other intrusive thoughts - Scarlett never discusses the parasites, even though that's a very prevalent fear of Charles'.

Scarlett is the manifestation of intrusive thought that Charles is a failure, rather than being a separate existence to Charles.

my little rat analysis lmaoooo. this was my first hello charlotte one, i've always loved charles, he's just peak gender in so many ways, incredibly relatable.

hope your little polycule goes well salutes

[billboard-hotties-tourney]

I just wanted to reassure people about the stress around moral superiority around autism, cos it seemed like some people were feeling genuinely bad

the only propaganda that was submitted in the OP for that individual was literally the word autism so i think ppl prolly felt like they were playing into a joke that op made?

like, obvi the submission for the other person was more passionate and included more details - and this is out of your hands as the person who's taking submissions, putting them in a randomizer and doing hard work compiling, tracking and posting everything - but the contrast between the two becomes funny

referring to this individual as a funky autistic man is a pretty common meme in the autism and new wave communities (and the considerable ven diagram overlap therein), and it's likely the submission was made by an autistic person - but at the same time part of what makes that individual attractive is the way he's so unapologetically himself, and the way that manifests is in how he dances, moves, talks and sings - in a way that people call weird but in a way that a lot of autistic people have done in the privacy of our own spaces - even been shamed for if we do it publically. some of the ways he sings is really reminiscent of a lot of vocal stimming for a lot of folks, for example, and his more jittery movements are very relatable so the autism is both a bit of a meme, but also a way that we feel seen - and that individual being (almost certainly) autistic and mainsteam people knowing about it and valuing him and finding him attractive and talented is a source of pride/hope in a lot of ways. There's many musicians, especially in alternate scenes like postpunk/new wave who seem pretty autistic to a practiced eye, but this individual has actually discussed the way he relates to that experience. i understand how, without that context, one could be genuinely worried that people believed that if you didn't vote for him you're abelist - but i really think that it's more of a lack of communication/understanding about how this is joked about in the relevant community, if that makes sense like, no-ones genuinally tracking down who voted for what and taking u to task for it. it's fundamentally a contest about who's hotter, and for some people this particular individual being [likely] autistic is relevant and makes him hotter - in the same way one might find an individual hotter if you enjoy or relate to their music, even if the person they're versed up against is objectively more attractive (if attraction can even be measured objectively, free of social practices/norms!) - and the fact that the only piece of propaganda was the word autism means that if you don't vote for him it must be because you hate the only thing that was mentioned about him is funny because it's so ott, but also cathartic for autistic people to joke about because so many of us have experienced hatred due to having autism. it's nice for that to be something funny and relevant in a real but also absurdist sort of way its very liberating, honestly, for an autistic person to be considered hot (being so often infantilised), so its this sense of pride in it too i guess - it can be okay to move in the world in a way that doesnt hurt and isnt tiring and brings you joy, and not only okay and normal but even desirable i hope this makes sense, i just wanted to reassure people that no-ones actually making a moral judgement, it is a meme but there's also something serious there too and it just seems like a joke that's not translating between communities i appreciate all the work that you've put into this tourney!!!! it's been very fun and i'm excited to keep on voting!

I was so worried when I saw such a long ask, but honestly, very well-put. Glad you're excited to participate!

[lilflowerpot]

i just saw your reply saying you wrote keith with your experience with autism in mind without realizing it! i just want to say that i love how personal this fic is for you, whether you intended it or not! like, looking back and realizing you connect even more with your character (bc you’ve developed keith so well he’s practically yours) is so cool!! and the autistic-coded-ness fits with the character so well, it fits with his foundations from the show and also the world you’ve built

anyways yeah just came to say i love that for you, as a huge fan of your work!

anonymous(2): Hello!! I recently read your little blade fanfic and I'm about to re read it as well, I love it sm! I saw that another person had said they related to Keith in relation to their autism and I'm so happy they did because I do as well!! I love seeing representation like that even if it's unintentional lol, and I was wondering if you had any autistic headcanons for Keith and or Lotor and if being galra effects that? If not that's totally chill! I hope you have an awesome day or night!

-

Thank you both! I'm honestly so happy to see so much love for autistic-coded Keith, he deserves it ♡

I don't explicitly have any autistic headcanons for either Keith or Lotor, because (as anon 1 said) it wasn't entirely intentional on my part. When writing Keith, I knew from the start that I wanted to explore his galra side and how that element of himself impacts his experiences, and obviously because he looks human this was always going to manifest in his instincts/behaviour; what with the galra being aliens, I wanted them to feel more nuanced than simply "tall purple humans" which lead to me playing around with the differences in how they might express themselves and the ways in which this might have caused Keith difficulties in the past.

Autism itself manifests in different ways to different degrees in different people, but broadly speaking it's a variation in how the brain works as opposed to the majority. According to the NHS, the key traits include:

difficulty communicating with / understanding the thoughts and feelings of others, unintentionally coming across as blunt / rude / uninterested, and misreading tone / intent in others

struggling with anxiety in unfamiliar situations / social settings, often preferring a set routine with clearly defined "rules", and difficulty making friends (and/or preferring solitude)

heightened pattern recognition, attention to detail, and senses

over-stimulation from things neurotypicals might consider mundane, such as bright lights / loud noises / strong smells / eye contact / physical proximity and/or touch

self-stimulating behaviours (stimming) often repetitive movements / sounds that can serve a variety of purposes

a keen or intense interest in a particular subject area / activity

These, obviously, are only the very broadest of strokes (and I comped together many of the bullet points for brevity's sake) but as you can see a lot of them are applicable to Keith—not only in LB, but in VLD too! As such, I don't think it's especially surprising that in dissecting his character so as to better understand and therefore write for him, I ended up creating a lot of overlap between autism and the galra, with the latter becoming a metaphor for how the former sees people (like Keith!) being "othered". With regard to Lotor, it's actually quite interesting because his galra/autistic traits are considered "normal" in Imperial society, whereas it's everything altean about him that has been met with reproach.

[narrativelysignificantturtleduck]

not the same anon but i also hc sokka as autistic (specifically audhd), bc there was always certain ways he behaved that i found i related to a lot. a lot of them are just reasons you mentioned: he can be very blunt, and one thing about sokka is that he is a tendency to put his foot in his mouth sometimes, just saying things as they are without realising it might be insensitive or that it might not be the best thing to say. and i know that him overlooking certain important details, such as toph being blind at times, can be attributed to adhd but i think that forgetfulness in regards to other people is something that can be attributed to autism, in that he doesn't really think about the fact she's blind despite obviously knowing. on the contrast though, whilst at times he seems unaware, i think sokka can be very hyperaware of very small things that hes insecure of that other people don't really notice, or that other people have pointed out that he might not have thought much about before which is also smt ik some ppl with autism struggle with. and even though he is a social person, like i mentioned before that at times he seems slightly unaware of certain things, but a lot of his social behaviours can be read as masking, like his insistence he is the "meat, sarcasm and planning" guy, trying to pin his personality on these key things, and whilst his attempts to be like hakoda are Daddy Issues it can also be read as the fact he knows his dad is a well respected, well liked man, and that by mimicking his behaviour he will be perceived as more socially acceptable.

the most obvious thing is the scheduling, we know he loves his plans and he's the self proclaimed "plan guy" but he gets quite grumpy when people don't abide by them and happy when people do. sokka is a very routine person, when we first see the swt he gets frustrated when the kids don't want to train, another thing that could be read as them throwing off his schedule. there's also the thing with the fortune teller- sokka is very insistent on his science, something he's very passionate about, and gets really easily frustrated when people won't listen to him when he's trying to explain something, and can't understand why people would believe that instead of what he believes, which also kind of leans into the whole social unawareness thing. nowadays i write him more as having audhd just because i think it fits more- a lot of autism traits and adhd do overlap, and it's very common for ppl with autism to have a lot of adhd traits, vice versa. that's all i can personally think of tho, but yeah all nd hcs are neat. need more in the world

you're so right actually. i've been fully convinced. i think because i'm audhd it's hard to separate out whether it's the adhd or autism that makes me relate to a character. it could be both! also i think that the way sokka is widely perceived as dumb and silly when he's actually very intelligent is very similar to adhd stereotypes and less similar to autism stereotypes, so it was easy for me to just kinda pick that one.

his insistence he is the "meat, sarcasm and planning" guy, trying to pin his personality on these key things

i have a whole post in my drafts about how his various different "[x] guy" titles throughout the show are evidence of adhd because you feel like you can't focus on one thing and you feel like a fuck-up (bc you may forget things/be disorganized) and you're desperately trying to find the one thing that will make up for you being an unfocused fuck-up. but it actually makes so much sense as autism too, as a social script that makes it easier to define himself to other people. also defining yourself by your interests and only wanting to interact with people through them is very autistic. i think it's a question on the raads-r. also it's why i'm on tumblr.

anyways, the fun thing is that both can be true simultaneously. it's a product of insecurities about adhd and also an autistic social script.

and whilst his attempts to be like hakoda are Daddy Issues it can also be read as the fact he knows his dad is a well respected, well liked man, and that by mimicking his behaviour he will be perceived as more socially acceptable.

i think this might've also been why i initially read him as only adhd. i fell for his mask! what we know of hakoda reads as only adhd, so i made the mistake of assuming that was it. and i'm a huge proponent of "hakoda and sokka are actually different people"! shame on me.

like, generally the way he's trying to play this warrior role that doesn't fit him because he thinks that's what he's supposed to be can be read as autistic masking. he imitates how he thinks strong men are and it comes off as comical and fake bc attempting to mask sometimes means the fact that it's a mask is really obvious.

yeah i'm into this. audhd sokka!!!!!

[applechip118]

anyways what i’ve tried (but failed ^^’) to talk about on here is how ptsd relates to me being otherkin/questioning. i’m really just hoping to hear maybe advice or solidarity from anyone else who has similar experiences? idk and also talk about this stuff to people who actually get it yk.

*this is more just a ramble and i’m not exactly going anywhere with it lmao*

tw for cptsd stuff like dissociation, as well as fnaf-typical violence/gore/rot etc. i won’t talk about my trauma itself though

basically the main way my dissociation/depersonalization has manifested, for at least a year (and coinciding when i got into fnaf) has been feeling like a springtrap-esque robot. it was really shocking to me how similar he was to how i felt, because like. it was EXACTLY the same yk. i felt myself physically rotting and feeling as though my limbs were machinery, being springlocked etc even to this day, and i know it’s dissociation but it’s not incomparable to how i experience phantom limbs.

since i quite literally am a machine, i suppose i’m technically robotkin? i’m not really sure if i should start identifying that way though, which is what i’ve been trying to get at. to me it’s like how i identify as genderfluid because it’s what i like best, even though i could also technically call myself transmasc, bigender, a cis girl etc because i fit those definitions (but if it doesn’t work that way for otherkin please let me know!). it is a personal goal of mine to “become human” again someday and not have to fall back into this kind of dissociation to cope. maybe then i could come back and consider this again? that’s probably gonna be the main takeaway from this but i just kinda need to ramble about it LMAO

i don’t get kin dysphoria for it though because uh. it’s kind of the default operating assumption for me yk? i only really get euphoria for it thinking about my place in the fnaf canon etc. outside of that i don’t really get euphoria from feeling physically like a corpse or robot 😂 (therianism doesn’t count)

i will say my cptsd is very likely the reason i’m a therian now, because it really rewired my brain and now i have much stronger tendencies to act like my theriotype than i would have a few years ago. i’ve also noticed i tend to exhibit a lot more “childish” behaviors and noticeable stims, and if you gave me an autism or adhd test now vs a year ago i would score much higher now even though i’m not autistic. it’s possible i might have had mild adhd or something before ptsd, but i can’t be sure. emotional dysregulation due to ptsd has caused some shift-like behaviors, i’ve noticed, probably more like hyperactivity, which can lead to shifts for me. obviously that’s something i’m trying to work on and i’m not saying it’s exactly good!

obviously it’s really not good for my health, and i didn’t choose to cope this way so it’s not copinglink. my place in fnaf could be called a coping thing as well but it’s also not voluntary. idk i feel like identifying as robotkin could be validating but i’m also really scared it’s going to encourage more dissociation and mess with my health yk? so then i should probably just Not lmao

i’m really trying to be objective and not be spiritual(tm) about things that are genuinely unhealthy. obviously i know dissociation is dissociation and it’s different (like how there’s so much misinformation about hallucinations and “messages” from what i’ve heard), i just think it’s interesting how there’s an overlap at least for me, especially considering how little is known about otherkinity/therianism

anyways rant over! there wasn’t really anywhere i was trying to go with it lmao. thank you guys and uh. genuinely i’m sorry for how much i’ve messed up with terminology etc so far, i really appreciate your patience and kindness

[sherlock-is-ace]

ok y'all i got to the episode She of The Good Doctor, the episode lots of you warned me it was transphobic, and I have some thoughts...

I appreciate your warning, it is an episode full of missgendering and discussions of difficult decisions made mostly by cis people, about the life of a trans girl. But I really really liked the ep.

For a bit of context. The patient is a 15 year old trans girl, Quinn (played by a trans actress btw), with testicular cancer. There's a discussion of stopping puberty blockers and then discussion of surgically removing both testicles (one of which is medically necessary). Because Quinn is a minor, the medical decisions are made by her parents, who support her and love her very much. Quinn's grandmother, is not so supportive, a lot of "he's confused" and "what if he wants children in the future". She even acuses the parents of abuse. When they're discussing what to do, there's a medical emergency and Quinn need to go into surgery immediately, so there's not a lot of time for making a decision. The parents consent only to the medically necessary surgery, so they take out the cancer affected testicle, leaving the other one intact. Quinn is sad at first, but she had already made up her mind about getting gender reaffirming surgery as soon as she turns 18, and her parents were on board with it (not that it was necessary, but it's nice).

Now, another big part of that episode, is Shaun's "sience says he's a boy" and all the missgendering. Which I'm not defending, I'll never defend transphobia, but I do understand. All the other neurotypical doctors were accepting of the trans patient, so I see how it looks. And as someone pointed out, there's quite the overlap between autistic people and trans people, so it would have been nice to not have all this. But, I also know that Shaun wasn't in a very supportive household, he left home when he was a child and was homeless for a while. His only firend was his even younger brother (so far there hasn't been mention of any friend in med school either). So I get how a guy like that, regardless of his autism, could be very ignorant about trans issues, you know?

Yes, I would have loved to have better writing in this ep, more support from that front. But in the canon of the show, in the world, from the point of view of the characters, it does make sense, and it is in fact very nice. Shaun asks lots of questions, some quite stupid, some quite personal and Quinn answers them, to quote her "I'd rather people ask questions instead of pointing and staring". He ties, he hears her, and he goes out of his way in the end, to really understand what she meant. I also feel like he might relate a bit, it is actually quite lovely.

I was sort of expecting to feel as horribly angry as I felt when watching that one really acephobic episode of House M.D. (you know, both being David Shore's creations), but it was much more enjoyable. Although to be honest with you, I do hold on so tight to Wilson trying to learn about asexuality in that ep, even tho the conclusion of the case was "syptom" and "faking" for both characters presented as ace. I do try to focus on the tiny glimpse of light lol

ok long ass post just to say, althoug there's a lot of missgendering in "She", I felt that it was a really lovely episode. Thank you so so much to the people who warned me about it, that's always welcomed, and this is in no way a diss on anyone who felt really uncomfortable by the ep, you're feelings are valid <3 but I don't think it was as bad as I thought.

[eldrai]

Please do!

Bless you, anon, for asking about it. Apologies in advance for wonky tumblr formatting. My response is uploaded on my ao3 here and is probably easier to read there.

This Is Calm And He’s A Doctor

Fandom Ableism in Criminal Minds

So this is a response to my post here which is talking about ableism in fandom spaces. The most major trend in the CM fandom (not the show – the show treats anything that isn’t depression or anxiety as Horrifying Serial Killer disorder because it’s 2000s copaganda) is the infantilisation of Reid.

As an autistic person myself, to be honest, I find it really uncomfortable.

Disclaimer: this is a trend I’ve noticed and is not about any one person in particular. Just want to make that very clear. Also yes, I know this is fanfiction, people do this for fun, they owe me nothing. And this isn’t me telling people not to write Reid or that they should only do it one way. This is me explaining my discomfort. That is all.

Reid is incredibly smart, not only in achieving his PhDs at his age but the outside knowledge he has of just about everything due to his eidetic memory. He’s also good at making connections between items of evidence and picking up on patterns in the geographical profiles. Since the start of the series he’s gained more confidence in social interactions and he’s shown to be able to fend for himself in interactions with unsubs both in interviews and out. He carries a gun after he passed the qualifications for it early on in the series. He often gives clear lectures on topics he’s an expert on in front of full auditoriums (and OK, his jokes might not always land but that’s hardly a professional impairment). He is at minimum competent and most of the time far more than that. And he’s autistic.

Though it’s never confirmed technically, it’s a popular interpretation followed by a lot of people, and a lot of those people write autistic!Reid as a dedicated tag. Due to CM being, again, an early 2000s TV programme, he is never allowed more clear identifiers but it’s generally agreed he is autistic, whether that’s the main plot point of a fic or not.

Yet there is a trend in fanfic where Reid is treated like a child. An adult autistic FBI agent with multiple PhDs treated like the baby of the team because he is autistic (or displays autistic traits) and as an autistic person, it’s uncomfortable to see happen. Even on a less personal level, the portrayal of Reid as relying on the team as opposed to being supported by them, like the rest of the characters are, is just out of character. This is the same man who had to take care of his schizophrenic mother after his father left. Beyond his addiction, he is never shown to be unable to take care of himself. I don’t doubt part of the infantilisation comes from the addiction but that’s not a topic I know enough about to have much of a take on, which is why I’m focusing on the autism instead.

I want to make it clear that this treatment of Reid is not automatically the same as fics with him being more ‘openly’ autistic or having higher support needs. It’s a venn diagram with some overlap but it’s not a given thing. There are plenty of really good fanfic out there that doesn’t infantilise him. Nor am I saying the people who do infantilise him do it out of malice or on purpose.

The difference is in the approach and intent.

An adult with high support needs is still an adult. You wouldn’t treat them like a child because they are an adult. If someone had trouble with auditory processing or following instructions and required clearer and simpler phrasing, you might talk to them differently but you would still not talk to them like a child – an adult with specific needs. You wouldn’t be talking down because you are aware you’re talking to an adult. To automatically talk to the adult as you would a child is ableist. To view them as less capable of understanding is ableist. The entire concept of ‘mental age’ is bad, though other people have written far more about that in disabled circles, because it often leads people to treat disabled adults as children.

There is nothing inherently childish about disabled adults or anyone with higher support needs. And autistic people are autistic but we are not only autistic.

And this is where I think people can go wrong – even and especially people with good intentions! In not erasing Reid’s autistic traits it’s easy to get caught up on focusing on him being autistic. And that isn’t inherently bad.

But when the writing or narrative starts to treat him like a child, that’s when it becomes uncomfortable. Because it strips away his agency and erases who he is as a character. It suggests that autistic people and/or their needs are childish just for being autistic. Infantilisation is a very real thing for many, many autistic people so to see it in fic over and over again, especially for Reid whose character epitomises intelligence, can get incredibly wearing.

For example, this ask highlights that the language used can be condescending:

I think the other thing I’ve seen (as an autistic adult very close in age to S1 Reid) is that the other characters (particularly Hotch) will call Reid “buddy”

In canon, the only person Hotch ever calls buddy is Jack, and Jack is four-five in most of his appearances. In his last appearance, he’s about ten. So that is just something that kind of infuriates me. In a lot of interactions people write between the team and autistic Reid, it sounds more like the interaction should happen with Henry or Jack, when Reid is a fully grown adult.

When the interaction between an autistic adult and his colleagues who have the same job as him can be imagined between a child instead, it comes across as incredibly infantilising. We do see Morgan call him ‘kid’ in the show but that comes across as light teasing, more because Reid’s the youngest and (at the start) newest member of the team, sort of like siblings.

Another example of the wider treatment of Reid in the fandom, not just limited to fic, is the way other characters are often demonised for interrupting him when on the job. I love Reid’s infodumping and it is genuinely endearing. I’ve also been in similar situations where I either do realise I need to stop or someone gives me some cue to. But Reid has a job to do – generally a pretty urgent one. Yes, the others can be more polite in cutting him off, especially in the earlier seasons. No, I don’t think it is as rude as some people do. They do need to move on from topic to topic, especially at a crime scene with a lot of evidence and clues to process, and Reid would know that the job involves that. Sometimes it is necessary to move on and the team often does this with just his name – which is not a particularly negative cue in itself.

This often ties in with the belief that he’s unable to stick up for himself if he did see it as rude. As Reid mentions: he was in LA public schools at nine and he is an adult during the series, albeit a young one. I doubt he completely lacks the ability to ask someone not to interrupt him – the same colleagues he’s comfortable enough with to mess around with physics tricks. If it is shown they address him as Dr. Reid deliberately so local police know how to address him, I believe the show might have shown if he was uncomfortable with being interrupted.

As the show goes on we also see this become more casual and more easily intuited by Reid, which suggests it’s not something he is opposed to. This interaction between him and Hotch in 7x07

    Reid: I’m rambling again, aren’t I?

Hotch: Yes.

is presented naturally in the show, and Reid himself being the one to ask Hotch shows that he does not mind being told when he is rambling. (Also, I firmly believe this is one of the most autistic interactions in the entire show from both sides but that’s neither here nor there). A few episodes later in 7x11 Reid calls out someone faking their cousin being the unsub for attention in front of many people and news cameras so I think it’s fair to say by this time in canon he’d be confident enough to speak to the team about his infodumping.

In 7x21 this is even more casual, where Hotch lightly taps Reid on the arm again implying that it is a relatively common occurrence. Even in an early season (2x13) Hotch does it with the dialogue “Reid. Stop, please.” and it’s worth noting that beforehand, Prentiss was engaging with his infodumping, not discouraging. In another episode it is “Reid. Reid. How do we find them?” which arguably redirects him to explain how his observation is linked to the case rather than cutting it off completely.

Therefore I find that the impact of the team interrupting or redirecting Reid is often not as large as many people insinuate or, to phrase it better, the intent and execution of it by the team as less mean. Again, autistic people are not children: Reid is more than capable of (a) dealing with hurt feelings and (b) speaking up about hurt feelings and is never shown to dislike the team for it. While this can be a painful experience for autistic people in real life it is not presented as such in the show and implying it must automatically be for Reid erases his agency and ability to handle such situations and/or emotions on his own.

As an aside, the belief that Hotch is mean/cold/unemotional is often evidenced by his lack of expression and affect. I have no problem with that belief based on canon evidence. What I am not a fan of is this idea that if you don’t perform emotions correctly – i.e. the way society at large decides people should – that you lack them entirely.

Reid’s canon snippier or badass moments, such as 3x14, going into the train to talk to the psychotic unsub, talking down numerous other unsubs and more I haven’t even seen yet (as of early Season 9)  – many of them except the iconic “This is calm and it’s Doctor.” – are often overlooked to feed into this narrative. Reid is highly capable and it’s proven many times throughout the show. His performance only really suffers during/after the Maeve ordeal, his dilaudid addiction and the migraine arc, which are all reasonable circumstances that any person would find it hard to work well through.

And this idea of Reid being more fragile than he really is in canon has a tendency to extend to fic via his hurt feelings being used as a plot device for members of the team to have to help or ‘save’ him as if he couldn’t do those things if they weren’t there to remind him. Full disclosure here: this includes a couple of my own fics too. When the plot hinges around Reid, who is more than competent, being unable to deal with a few mean words and relies on the allistic (non-autistic) people rescuing him… it can feel demeaning.

That isn’t to say he can’t ever be fragile or hurt. That’s not to say those things can’t ever bother him because of course they can, and the team should be there for him. But like the rest of the team, he is fully capable of holding his own. If nothing else, to say he isn’t is out of character.

Another area in which the infantilisation becomes quite clear is in shipping.

Again, I’m going to add a disclaimer that no ships, tropes and/or dynamics themselves are inherently the problem. That just isn’t how it works and to claim otherwise would be wrong and also erasing all the works using those things which do portray Reid well in character.

Most Reid ships using D/S or omegaverse dynamics place him into the traditionally submissive role as the smaller, more ‘innocent’ character. Admittedly this will have a lot to do with the stereotypes of masculine behaviour and appearance and there are people who can articulate that far better than I can. However, the choice frequently made to have the autistic character fill this role is worth questioning as I believe his autism plays a significant role in the decision.

There is a common stereotype of autistic characters being asexual and inexperienced with sex, or overly ‘innocent’ and pure despite being adults. It’s worth saying that there is nothing wrong with asexual autistic characters, especially when they are made or headcanoned by autistic and/or autistic asexuals, and asexual autistic people’s existence is not fulfilling stereotypes. The innocent perception comes from the idea autistic adults are unable of comprehending or enjoying sex, a blanket stereotype which can be harmful to real life autistic people.

In Reid’s case, he’s an adult who works for the BAU. He has seen incredibly graphic crime scenes which often involve sexual components and he is not shy about discussing the significance of the sexual elements. I would not say this makes him new to the subject even if he has not had or does not have sex. And though his awkwardness is often used as something of a joke, he’s shown at multiple points throughout the series to display romantic interest and have people be interested in him (Reid getting phone numbers and being propositioned, for starters, as well as Maeve) including Lila.

Yet many fics like to portray him as immature and completely new to the idea of sex to contrast him with someone more dominant and experienced who can show him the ropes, pun not intended. He’s hardly Derek Morgan but he is not completely unused to the idea of romantic and/or sexual relationships and the automatic assumption he would be – that his lack of major interest is an inherent quality in him rather than a choice, like with any other adult – reinforces the idea of autistic adults as innocent and childish.

(Note: it’s the idea of innocence vs the role of submissive that I’m questioning here. There is absolutely nothing wrong with autistic adults, real and fictional, taking on submissive roles. It’s just about being a constant pattern in fanfic.)

This is overwhelmingly present in Hotchreid fanfiction, though definitely not all: a tendency for Reid to be stripped of his wit, his immense knowledge and his confidence to fit neatly into the mold of almost helpless, ‘pure’ man relying on Hotch. Because it is almost always Reid forced into this role.

Why can’t Reid be dominant? Why can’t Reid enjoy sex just as much as other characters? Because he doesn’t have to talk about it all the time to do that. Why is it so often Reid being lead, Reid being new, Reid in that submissive role? I believe sometimes it is a good thing to question why we write what we write.

Of course, I see the appeal of Hotchreid and I see why people ship it. I’ve got nothing against it as a ship – the whole younger/older man thing? Yeah. It’s a big draw. And I’m not saying Reid is only ever put into that more submissive role because he’s autistic, because he isn’t, but I do believe it is a factor.

(A quick mostly unrelated tangent: Hotch married his childhood sweetheart. For most of the series he has only ever had two partners – if either of them are going to know the intricacies of BDSM, I’d put my money on the single avid reader. But that’s the fun of fiction, playing around with stuff!)

Even in fics without such dynamics (and I stress again the use of dynamics itself has nothing to do with my qualms here) the perception of Reid as the inexperienced partner who needs taking care of tends to bleed through. Having the autistic character seen as such where there is no reason he should be is again infantilising him, presenting him as less of an equal in maturity in the relationship.

This is my biggest reason to believe his autism can lead to the infantilisation. There is no need for someone to be so submissive out of a relationship with defined dynamics so the fact so many fics do still push elements of those tropes onto Reid is very telling. Like there’s something about Reid which makes people view him as more inexperienced and needy.

Hell, fanart often depicts Reid as much smaller in proportion to the team where canonically, there is only about an inch difference in height between Hotch (1.87m) – the tallest – and Reid and Morgan, who are both around 6’1” (1.85m) and this is in pieces which are not overly stylised. Reid might be a pipe cleaner with eyes (my favourite insult) but he’s not a short one. To be clear I’m not criticizing the quality of the art, because fanartists are incredibly talented, but the decision to make Reid so much smaller.

In particular, there is often a larger difference in size between Reid and Morgan than canonically exists with Reid being smaller and Morgan larger than canon. Black fans in other spaces have pointed out trends in fandom with racist overtones, e.g:

    Black/brown characters written or drawn as significantly larger (height and muscle-wise) than their canon self and/or a white character or a light-skinned character of color [Source]

It’s not my place to speak about this, so I’ll leave you with their thoughts and just add that Reid’s autistic traits go hand-in-hand with babying him.

It extends to platonic interactions with the team, at times treating him little better than an actual child. See: calling him ‘buddy’ which is the term literally used about Jack. Reid may be the youngest but he is a functioning part of the team, not a responsibility, not an obligation, yet so many fics work with the framework that he is simply unable to recognise his own needs. A trained FBI agent, may I remind you. And that’s not to say that he never struggles or he should never have his friends caring for him, but that it shouldn’t be any different to any of the rest of the team being comforted.

These things aren’t necessarily a problem but when they happen over and over again, all the time, when they start to become a pattern, it does raise the question: what about this character suggests he should be treated with kid gloves?

It isn’t intentional. I will say that now and I do believe it: people aren’t looking at Reid, going ‘oh, he’s autistic,’ and immediately deciding to put him in those roles. We are rarely so straightforward and most biases like that are completely unconscious. That’s what makes them tricky to talk about and to understand. Furthermore, having Reid be treated that way reads as out of character at times – this is the same Reid who has jokes made about his age, who the team go out of their way to introduce as Dr. specifically so that people know and respect him. Would they really turn around and treat him like he’s incapable of independence? Would Reid want or tolerate that?

And I’m not saying nobody should write the topics I’ve mentioned. These things existing is not a problem: sub Reid, omega Reid, the team taking care of. It’s when they become the only things Reid’s story is about, when the need for Reid to be infantilised is central to the story and his real character is erased, that we should question why.

Because from where I stand it looks an awful lot like his autistic traits.

[conanssummerchild]

okay so id initially put this in the tags of your ask but i thought id put it in your askbox so you don't feel obligated to answer it or you wanna answer privately instead cause it's very rambly and kinda personal

#also im curious. what do you do after you get an autism dx?#because like back when my psychiatrist evaluated me for a bunch of things. i was curious if i was somewhere on the autism spectrum too#cause i did check a lot of boxes#and she essentially told me i have a lot of the overlapping stuff because of other conditions and i could do the autism evaluation#but it would be a waste of time for me because it wasnt my main dx and doesn't make my life unbearable#because im already taking meds and shit for other stuff but you dont take meds or really do anything about having autism#so she basically told me you might be on the spectrum but there's no point in getting a dx cause it doesnt change anything#but also cuz for me it's probably mild and doesnt affect my every day life that much#so yeah i guess i was curious. im so sorry if this comes off as rude btw#because i know getting dxed changed my life and its so much better now. and im so proud of you for that finally happening#and my situation is very different from yours like even if i am on the spectrum it probably doesn't affect me to an extent where it fucks#with my every day life to an unbearable degree yk#but im definitely curious about how you go forward once you get an autism diagnosis when it does significantly affect your life. like do you do anything about it?#i do know it's validating as hell and your parents will finally take you seriously. cause you've obviously known for a while#and again i know its gonna get so much better hereon. getting dxed literally changes your life and im so so happy for you#how did your family and everyone take it?#like i had the worst relationship with my parents i was gonna cut them off after school but it got so much better after my dx#like they became so much more understanding and like put in the effort to change and be better and its still a long road but yeah#it's kind of fucking awesome and life changing and i really hope it is for you too#im so so so happy for you

well i guess i dont really know yet, i had an appointment yesterday at school hours and i went alone and then i went straight back to school and now im at my friends house so i havent seen my parents yet. i have my last appointment with my psycologist in 2 weeks and that one is with my parents so its basically when shes going to tell them, i dont plan on telling my dad about it before then bcs he can go fuck himself but i am going to tell my mum as soon as she gets home from barcelona. so i cant really say anything parents-wise yet. as for like outside that at the moment theres really nothing at all i can do until my parents are in on it, since im a minor my parents are the ones who choose if the school knows and i can get accomodations but if they choose not to tell them theres really not much i can do, so for me a diagnosis doesnt change much (apart from FINALLY after more than EIGHT years knowing whats different abt me) unless my parents let it change stuff, and at the moment i font know if they will :/, so to answer "what do you do after a diagnosis?" i really dont know. if u want to get diagnosed though and u think you could i would probably go for it, you can keep it to urself since ur over 18 so u dont have to tell anyone else if u dont want to and idk it might come in handy even if it doesnt it is nice to feel validated but anyway its up to you <3

ps: you can literally ask me anything u want to know i dont mind and dont worry abt coming off as rude i dont think u r <33 love u