#I also wanted to see if chronic pain can be labeled as a disability cause... If I need income thats something.

[foxgirlmoth]

Aw lads not again

[cripple-culture-is]

i have a genuine question.

i'm very sure i'm physically disabled on some sort of level(?), and doing research, i have seen other disabled folk say that my experiences are valid. i have seen people say that unnamed/unknown/undiagnosed disabilities are still such, and should be included in the discussion. i know how limited i am in terms of all the things i can't really do, such as stay outside or even stand for very long, and i often get many headaches just for doing minor things like that. i'm also prone to chronic pain/illness, albeit quite mild, but i feel like any of it's not enough to earn me a voice. there's some sort of guilt i have when i want to claim a community label or discuss my experiences, as i wonder if i'm speaking over people who have it worse than me and definitely do know everything about themselves with the confidence to justify their place.

do you think someone like me belongs in disabled safe spaces? would i get harassed and booed out for using my privilege to fake and deceive my way in? am i not really disabled and/or should i seek a much lighter, open to questioning, unprioritized, etc. version of the wider community so that i can get what i need without intruding on those who need it more? i'm just afraid of offending people who are actually, clearly disabled. i assume it's possible for someone's life to be physically difficult to navigate due to complications without necessarily being classified as disabled. y'know?

Thank you so much for the question! I am very happy to answer it 😁

I'm going to preface this by saying there is no such thing as being "not disabled enough". There are disabled people with higher and lower support needs (I have low support needs, my wheelchair using relative has high support needs), but no one is inherently "not disabled enough".

People tend to think of disability as being linear. They see the disability spectrum as ranging from being "less disabled" to "more disabled". That's not true. Not everyone with the same condition will manifest the same way.

Not everyone with my medical condition is disabled. While I seem "less disabled" than my relative, I am still equally disabled under U.S. law.

There are always people who will have something worse than you. But the more you think about them, the more you begin to ignore your own struggles. It can fall into the realm of "toxic positivity". By thinking "Oh, I don't have it that bad, someone else has it worse", you kind of gaslight yourself into thinking you're completely fine when you're not.

I read actually a lot of internalized ableism in your comment. Happens to all of us. It honestly makes me cringe, but it's definitely not your fault.

From my own experiences, you belong here. People think that only visible disabilities are VALID disability. Those with "actual clear" disabilities. But most disabled people actually have invisible disabilities.

I am NOT visibly disabled. I don't use a wheelchair, cane, or any other type of mobility aid. I have an autoimmune disease that causes chronic pain, inflammation, and joint damage. I have been physically disabled my entire life.

Trust me when I say that you not being visibly physically disabled DOESN'T MEAN you aren't physically disabled.

July is Disability Pride Month, yes, it's the 31st, so the last day of July. But the point still stands. There's a banner on the Disability Pride Month pride flag for people like us. The white banner stands for invisible and undiagnosed disabilities. There is definitely a space here for you.

You aren't "faking" or "deceiving" your way into the disabled community. Will you be harassed? Maybe. There is some ableism within even the disability community. I've been harassed in real life for using things I have a legal right to, merely because I'm not "clearly disabled".

I can guarantee that if you saw me, you would just see a "standard", "normal", non-disabled 20 year old girl. 100%. I know because that's how most people see me. But I'm physically disabled under American law.

There is space for you here. You are welcome here. And I do not tolerate ableism of any kind on this blog, therefore, you're safe here, and your experiences are just as valid as any of the other physically disabled people here ❤️

Most non-disabled people don't run into barriers in society when it comes to what they can do physically. Chronic pain is ALWAYS considered a disability under U.S. law, and if (and hopefully when) you get a chronic illness/chronic pain diagnosis, you are automatically protected under the ADA. If you run into issues standing for long periods of time, you are likely disabled. I struggle with the same exact thing.

And I know most people DON'T struggle with that. Earlier this year, I saw 20+ people stand up for the entirety of a junior hockey game, including intermissions, and that was about 1 and a half to 2 hours long. I can only stand in one spot for about 2-5 minutes without my knees and feet hurting, to the point where I will always shift my weight from foot to foot when standing.

And I'm also going to be 100% honest with you. People will say "those who need it more". There actually AREN'T many accommodations for disabled people, and there's actually no shortage of accommodations for disabled people. They are just HIGHLY HIGHLY gatekept by the non-disabled government and withheld, sometimes even from those who need it.

You belong in this community, and you are welcome here ☺️

[figs-and-cigs]

So I started talking to this guy, we hit things off pretty well, went on a couple dates. It became very clear that he was pretty infatuated with me. He began asking about a relationship, labels, a kink dynamic. I mostly shrugged on the red flags: "sure I'd like and am interested in those things - we'll see how it goes!"

So my entire household got sick, kiddo, spouse, myself. My chronic fatigue kicked in and I wasn't interacting with anyone. I'm very honest about my health issues whenever I start taking to people. I go through phases of intense self care/isolation. I have mental and physical health issues, but I manage them. I get sick or have chronic pain/fatigue flares often. "If you don't hear from me, I'm usually fine, busy, sleeping."

But, very often, when people (who don't know me very well) don't hear from me for a bit they seem to jump to 2 conclusions.

I'm dying or at least suffering greatly!

OMG I must hate you and don't want anything to do with you!

Neither of which are ever really true - and if they are I'll say something (I know how to ask for help, and I know how to communicate if our relationship isn't working.)

So this guy I'd been talking to didn't hear from me for a day - because I was sick and slept all day. He sent tons of messages (1. accurately assuming I was "suffering".) I responded as I could and moved on with my life (parenting, being sick with a sick spouse).

Eventually we were feeling better and I went to a Polyam friends' for game night. Well Mr. Guy called, I didn't answer (because I was kicking butt at Quelf), and he sent messages about how worried he was because he hadn't heard from me, for a day...

Anyways after another 2 weeks of me literally just living my life (parenting, self care, my support groups, therapy, cfs day, projects, time with spouse, social engagements) and being bombarded by texts about how worried he was about my being sick all the time (1), or how worried he was that I lost interest in him (2). (Note: I wasn't ignoring him, just not able to have hour long conversations with him every damn day!)

I finally spoke up, eventually ending in this message:

"I really wanted to explore this, but it seems really apparent to me that while a lot of our interests are aligned you're wanting and hoping for a lot more than I can offer - and the timeframe of things aren't aligning well, and my health issues and inability to be more involved in your life is causing you immense distress. It doesn't feel right for me to continue this."

He offered to change (yikes!) insisted he wanted to understand and "navigate this with me" (I don't come with a manual!) There were other red flags I didn't mention, but I'm glad I kept my boundaries and handled this pretty gracefully.

Did I mention I'd only talked to this guy for 2 months, went on 2 dates, didn't establish any type of dynamic? He's also married and been Polyam for 10 years? Also during those 2 months he had 3 other partners breaks up with him... (my understanding is these relationships weren't very long either...)

I hope he talks to his therapist and sorts his stuff out. Trying not to be judgey mcjudgerson but damn dude....

Meanwhile, this isn't my first rodeo and I'm kind of frustratingly wondering -

Do I need to find a better way to clarify my disabilities, my schedules, the way I communicate to new people? It hasn't seemed to be an issue for most of my relationships - but their communication style seem to align with mine (i.e. we don't need to talk every day.) My conclusion is NO, I can't control when people take it personally or become worried about me - and I can only use so many spoons to continually validate and reassure them that 1. I'm ok. I manage my health issues. 2. It's not about them.

WTF is it about "Polam" Cishet MEN wanting to jump into a relationship/dynamic within the first month of talking!?!? This isn't the first time, and I'm sure I won't be the last. (I'm reminded of the man, who on our first date, tried to link our Google calendars together! Ughhh. NO!) I've not had this problem with non Cishet Men - (and not with the Cishet Men I currently have relationships with lol). But even monogamous people date for a while before starting a relationship, right? RIGHT?

[f1zz-k1d]

writing, drawing, and talking about cane users

A guide by me, a disabled person tired of the shitty content i keep seeing.

SO, a lot of people have been drawing character Philza using a cane.

Great!

There are just a few things i want to point out.

(i am a young disabled person with chronic pain in my legs and back and low blood pressure that causes me to faint and collapse. i am waiting on a cane right now, but for now I use a short collapsible walking stick made for hiking :)

Writing

The big issue I see a lot with people writing Phil as a cane user is a loss of autonomy, which is a very common trope in writing when writing disabled people. Here's how to avoid it!

Let's say, for example, in your fic, Phil is having a hard time walking on, like, sand. (side note, sand and gravel and all loose and unstable grounds are very hard for those of us using a cane or a walking stick.) His friend Techno helps him walk over this ground, by supporting or carrying him. A good way to write this would be, for example:

Phil: This ground is hard for me to walk on, could you help me out, Techno?

Techno: Of course.

Or:

Phil is visibly struggling to walk on the uneven ground.

Techno: Would you like help walking here?

Phil: Yes, thank you!

What happened in both of this situations was that the disabled person was given a choice in getting assistance from an abled friend. Now let's see how not to write this:

Phil is having trouble walking on the uneven ground. Techno, his abled friend, picks him up and puts his cane in his pack without asking.

Techno: Obviously you need help. It's terrible you need a cane, Phil. I hope you get better.

Phil swoons like a silent film star.

Obviously this is a little exaggerated! But it encompasses a lot of the bad tropes we see often with a disabled character.

1. A loss of autonomy/Not asking! Our mobility aids are an extension of ourselves. Don't touch 'em without permission, Badly Written Techno! And don't write a character "helping" a disabled person without asking first. We can ask!

2. Treating disability as a bad thing/"Hopefully you get better." Obviously, if most of us had a choice, we would like to not be in pain all the time. But that isn't a choice! A lot of disabilities are chronic, so we won't get better. And the biggest thing: "It's horrible you have to use that mobility aid." Nope! Our existence is not terrible. It's who we are.

Another small note: "Disabled" isn't a bad word!

Here's something I see a lot, once again written with our friends Phil and Techno.

Phil: I know you must hate travelling with someone so... disabled...I must... slow you down so much...

Techno: Phil... to me, you aren't disabled... you're strong... just...differently abled...

Phil bursts into tears at the show of support.

So. That was a lot. First of all, a lot of disabled people, for one reason or another, struggle with this sort of self hate. The idea that we "slow people down," that we're "just weak," or that we're "not disabled enough for xyz." It's fine, and realistic, to write disabled characters thinking like this! But the idea that disabled people are strong despite their disability, not disabled, and strong is just silly! Also, just call us disabled. We don't have "special abilities" and we're not "handi-capable." We're disabled, and that's okay.

(Side note. If you want to write the "Don'ts" into a story, feel free, but be aware of the fine line this can walk between realistic depiction of people's attitudes toward disabilities, and plain ol' ableism. In general, just try not to reward this behavior/make it look good and righteous when characters do it in your stories!)

Drawing

This is mostly because I feel so bad for all these characters with improperly drawn canes!! A cane that's too tall will force a user to work extra hard, often straining muscles in the arm, to move it in sync with steps. One that's too short will throw off someone's balance and gait, often causing more harm than good. A good way to test how tall a cane should be is the wrist test:

[Image ID: A simple drawing of a man in side profile. He stands tall and relaxed. In front of him is a curved-top cane with a line leading from the top of the cane's handle to his wrist joint, showing how tall the cane should be. Below is a line from the bottom of the cane to his shoes, labelled "Street shoes." End Image ID.]

In general, the cane should go on the opposite side of the leg/joint that hurts. This is so the natural opposite leg-to-arm walk cycle isn't interrupted by the use of the cane. I use my stick in this way, and then switch hands when I need to!

If you need references for drawing or animating a person with a cane, just look up videos and photos of people with canes! For animating a walk cycle with a cane, try to find videos made by medical professionals. They know what they're doing!

Talking About Us! There's really only two things here, that I am TIRED OF.

1. "Old man!" jokes. Obviously we all call Phil an old man, he is in his thirties after all! But making jokes like this in direct reference to a character using a cane is harmful. Young people also use canes and mobility aids! Another thing, some of us are part timer cane users who only need them on long or strenuous walks, or particularly bad illness days in our lives. Same as how most wheelchair users are ambulatory.

2. Language like "bound to [mobility aid in question.]" Generally, we prefer language like "cane user" or "person with a cane."

If you have questions, google 'em, or ask a disabled person. Feel free to put questions in the replies or shove them in my inbox

Now go and create! I know I love seeing content of people with disabilities, especially very cool and truly brave men like Philza Minecraft!

Please reblog this post! You recieve: a kiss on the cheek and eternal gratitude from your local disabled artist and writer ❤️

[bondsmagii]

I’m rereading Vicious and after knowing everything about Vengeful everything that Eli did on vicious makes so much sense.

The first time I read Vicuous I always wondered what exactly went through Eli’s head, what was he thinking? When he looked for Victor when Victor was about to replicate his experiment? Was Eli concerned about Victor or was Eli was acting for selfish reasons? What was he thinking and feeling after he got his powers? What was he thinking when Victor attacked him and why was he so quick to think Victor was a devil in disguise? What was his last thought when he was about to become an Eo and how does it relate to healing? What was his thought process when he was trying to give up his life to god and when he decided that killing EOS was the “right” thing to do?

And after reading Vengeful everything becomes so much clearer, his last thought was probably about how he wanted to be “healed and saved” he internalized so some much religious trauma that it affected the way he acted and his thogught porcess, he witnessed his mother suicide on a bathtub and that’s probably why he chose that method both times before and after becoming an EO, his father used to beat him as a kid because he supposedly “had the devil in him” and he does feels like one through his life, doing his best to act as “normal” as possible.

His mother death also explains why he was so worried about Victor and even in the first book Eli talks very fondly of him even referring to him as his best friend and he explains to Serena he thinks Victor died and something sinister replaced him after becoming an EO and this conclusion although rash, it make sense he would try to rationalize and in a way justify the awful things that Victor did after turning into an EO.

And even in vengeful he started imagining Victor to kept him company when he was going through hell, he admits to himself that Victor was the only person who ever truly “saw” him and understood him, pretty much confirming that the “rivalry” Victor and Eli had was mostly one-sided and Eli really did loved him and consider him his best friend.

This also explains his weird behavior towards Victor when Vic himself was trying to turn himself into an EO, Eli witnessed his mother death and probably didn’t wanted the same to happen to Victor after Eli himself almost died trying to recreate it.

The first book also explains that he tried to take his life a second time after Victor got arrested begging for God to take away his power if it had been a mistake, he seemed to externalize all of this negative experience and feelings through his purpose of exterminating the EOS because he sincerely believed that was the right thing to do, his faith although horribly used and mishandled seemed to be genuine based on how we was him literally begging to god to take his life back if everything had been a mistake.

Everyone one of his actions seem to be driven by his childhood and religious trauma and it’s incredible sad to me, he wan’t a sociopath or a psychopath he was just very broken and delusional individual.

And his experience with Serena who forced herself into him also didn’t helped the whole “EOS are devils in disguise” perspective , even since I read the first book (when I didn’t knew anything about Eli yet) I was very repulsed by what Serena was doing to him, to the point that even though I greatly disliked Eli at first I kind of hated Serena more for what she was doing to him. I am also a little disappointed in how the fandom barely acknowledges that what Serena did to Eli was incredibly wrong and messed up.

I have already said this, but the fandom seems to treat Eli very unkindly, they brush over all of his story and just label him as a “sociopath” or “psychopath” barely understanding and completely missing the point of why he behaved the way that he did.

I don’t mind if people hate his character, I did so at first, but the way everyone brush over all of his trauma and the way people completely misinterpreted his character and actions don’t set up right with me.

It’s a little surprising how people can praise Serena, Victor and Marcella despite their awful actions while they hate on Eli for the same reason, overall Eli seems to have been the one to receive the shorter end of the stick by the fandom.

honestly I've read this so many times because you're so right and it's such a relief to know that somebody else out there is capable of critical thinking skills lmao. I think the problem with people's response to Eli is that they think his backstory is an excuse, when in actual fact it's an explanation. go figure, kids who grow up in abusive households will turn into adults with a boatload of issues, and some of those issues are more likely than not going to cause harm of their own. it's totally possible to be both a victim and someone who causes harm; yes, Eli thinks he's in the right, but his actions are still wrong. it's possible to understand both of these things and it's possible to still like his character and sympathise with him, while still understanding that damn, he maybe needs to chill on the serial killing.

it wouldn't bother me as much if people didn't think that Victor was absolutely innocent. people seem to revere him, and it's because in the narrative he's set up as Eli's opposite. the whole point of the story is that there's no good men in the game, but because Victor wants to stop Eli, people see him as the good guy and overlook how cruel he was to Eli throughout their entire friendship, and also how cruel he is to the others. (Mitch is probably the only one there of his own free will. Sydney was an injured 12-year-old child when Victor picked her up, and he did so only because she had information that he wanted -- his first thought was to torture it out of her, but when she gave it willingly and kind of hero-worshipped him in the way a neglected child would hero-worship their saviour, he decided she could stay. Dominic is there by force, because he's a disabled man in constant chronic agony that Victor fixes with his EO abilities, and if he does something to displease Victor or leaves him, Victor has threatened to bring the pain back even worse.) people rewrite both Eli and Victor's personalities to fit this, with Eli being cast as this unfeeling psychopath and Victor the person standing up to his evil, and in actual fact Eli is absolutely not a psychopath -- he's a traumatised adult recovering from a highly abusive childhood -- and Victor is not standing up to evil; he's settling a score. a score he kind of started in the first place, by being a jealous asshole towards Eli's thesis, trying to dominate it because his own sucked, seeking glory off the back of Eli's hard work, and then when he succeeded in his goals and became an EO, immediately murdering Eli's girlfriend and torturing Eli because he was jealous Eli's idea was correct. like, Victor Vale is a little bitch, on god. the reason it ended like this was because he was a god-awful friend to Eli, who was literally Victor's only true friend because he was the only person who would put up with him. go figure that the only person who could deal with Victor's behaviour was a grown abused child. nobody who hadn't been indoctrinated into believing that behaviour was acceptable would ever voluntarily deal with Victor.

literally every decision and action Eli takes can be traced back to his trauma, but go figure that nobody on this website can treat trauma with the nuance it deserves. people on this site seem to think that if you're traumatised you're always innocent and vulnerable; if anyone acts outside of this idea, they're written off. I take Eli's treatment very personally because I've seen people quite literally do this to real life people, myself included. because I wasn't a quiet, easy-to-deal-with traumatised person, I got all kinds of shit. it's the exact same with Eli. because he acts badly, because he does bad things, people seek to dehumanise him and set him aside because he apparently makes abuse survivors look bad or whatever -- when in actual fact acting badly is a very common response among abuse survivors, because we were brought up in an environment where that was normal and we don't know otherwise. not to mention the fact that the kind of mental illness Eli shows -- PTSD, mainly -- has many symptoms that make for unpleasant actions. it's not a crime to show the impact these things have, but people take it so personally. I've even seen people say it's ableist to portray characters like Eli because it gives people with trauma or mental illness a bad name, but no. that's literally not how it works. people with trauma and people with mental illness act badly, they fuck up, they can abuse people, sometimes they do harm or even kill people. ignoring this isn't going to get us anywhere, and if anything's ableist, it's looking at a clearly traumatised, mentally ill person and saying that he's a psychopath and evil and irredeemable. like, come on.

Eli didn't catch a single break for his whole life. everyone he's ever met has abused him horribly. you don't have to like him, but the people who can look at this and see nothing sympathetic about him? genuinely I don't trust them.

[matildaisautisticandproud]

April 8th - 30 Days of Autism Acceptance

April 8: What are some misconceptions/stereotypes about autism that you hate?

1. People with autism don’t want friends. Albeit this might be true to some, this isn’t true to all. Most autistics, I’ve found, want to have more friends, but either don’t know how to go about befriending people and/or people don’t want to spend time with them. Personally, for years, I always longed to have a friend who got me and that I could be open with. (I struggled to actually be myself around people my whole life and still do.) My roommate, Missy, is that friend now, but you don’t know how lonely it is going through grade school without a best friend.

Lots of other girls had besties and many of my friends had friends that they shared their most darkest secrets with; they were super close to each other. Since I didn’t know how to go about forming that connection and I am generally a reserved person, I never had that friend and it was painful. I wanted a best friend, but I didn’t know how to establish a strong connection, maintain it, and most people thought I was “weird” and didn’t really want to be my friend.

I don’t mean to throw my own pity party by saying this, but I was the person who others would one day make me feel on top of the world by including me, but then, would distance themselves once they were done with me and make me feel terrible. This constant cycle of inclusion and exclusion, interest and disinterest, was really damaging to younger me. It frustrated me and made me think the reason I couldn’t have a close, good friend was because there was something wrong with me. (There’s never something wrong with you (unless you’re a murderer or that of the like). It’s society who is in the wrong for tossing aside such a beautiful human being.)

2. People with autism can’t feel or express emotion. This statement is 100% false. By saying this, people are invalidating the emotions of autistics, which is never okay. It is true that many on the spectrum have the inability to recognize their own emotions and/or don’t express their emotions as “normal” people do, but we still have feelings. Just recently, I have gotten better at identifying what I’m feeling, but I’m still not adroit with it. Also, I think that I feel a lot more deeply that those not on the spectrum, as do many autistics. Because I don’t really express my emotions, I’ve had people say that I seem “emotionless” and “robotic” all throughout my life. I never did and still don’t think much of it; it’s just how I am.

I get scared, sad, furious, elated, and more. Just because I don’t express my emotions in a way you can understand doesn’t mean I don’t have them. My body language is just different. (Also, I’ve learned to internalize all my emotions and grievances so, no body really knows what’s going on in my head.)

3. All autistics are just like [insert name here]. As I’ve stated numerous times before, the nature of ASD is that no two manifestations of it are exactly the same. Two autistic people may share similar experiences and struggles, but autism still affects them at least slightly differently.

4. Autistics can’t understand the emotions of others and are apathetic. Many autistics actually experience “too” much empathy. Some are apathetic, but as are some people who aren’t on the spectrum. Everyone is susceptible to being apathetic.

5. An autistic person has only struggles; they’re just their autism. Yes, autism is a key part of every autistic’s life, but it is not the only aspect of who we are. I think people should focus more on what a child can do than what they can’t, overall. Sure, Mark may not be able to handle going to the mall due to overstimulation, but he is especially skilled in painting. People should focus less on faults and flaws. Just focusing on such things will make life drab and miserable; plus, people as a whole are more than just their struggles.

6. People can grow out of autism, and it is only present in children. I, along with many others, are proof that this is false. I dislike how the struggles of adults (with and without autism, ADHD, and other disorders) are ignored in society. Not all problems go away with adulthood; it isn’t some cure all.

7. “There wasn’t all this autism/ADHD/etc. stuff back in my day so, it can’t be real.” These disorders are very much real. Perhaps the numbers have been increasing, but maybe there has just been a decrease in ignorance and an increase in compassion and acceptance. Also, diagnosing has gotten much easier, and since there is more knowledge available (i.e. the Internet) than ever before, people can self-screen and then determine whether or not to be tested. The only reason I am diagnosed is because I took the time to research different disorders via the Internet and decided to get professionally evaluated.

8. “Autism is caused by one thing.” Whether this “thing” be vaccines, a gene mutation, bad parenting, trauma, etc., this statement has been proven false by science. When studying the cause of autism, scientists have found that in one person, one gene could be the contributor to the person’s autism while in another, it’s a combination of several genes. The cause is unknown, but bad parenting has been debunked. However, there is evidence to suggest that the presence of heavy metals within a person’s system may be a possible cause. (Numerous children with autism have been found to have high levels of heavy metals within their body.)

As for the vaccine statement, it is unknown whether or not they do or don’t cause autism. There was a study carried out with the goal of proving or disproving the claim, but since the data was skewed, the results are invalid. I don’t necessarily support the claim, but there is not enough evidence for either side of the argument for me to take a side. I am a neutral in this debate. Though, I don’t believe that one should risk the death of their child just because they’d rather not have an autistic child. We’re not that bad; several parents love having an autistic child.

9. Autism only affects the brain. Again, I and many others are living proof that this claim is false. Many people with autism have co-occurring conditions like allergies, food sensitivities, gastrointestinal disorders, and epilepsy. Personally, I have numerous food sensitivities and gastrointestinal issues. I haven’t gotten a name as to what is wrong with my digestive system, but I do know there is a problem given what I experience on a daily basis.

10. All autistics are intellectually disabled. All statements that start with “all autistics” are automatically false. Even if the claim doesn’t pertain to autism itself (i.e. a political belief), autistics, like other people, have their own sets of beliefs and their own lifestyles. We’re human just like you; all that’s different is how our brains are wired and the struggles we endure.

To combat this claim, many autistics have a normal to high IQ level and can excel in school. There are those who have lower IQs, but they still can excel. One’s potential to be great isn’t dictated by IQ or a disability (or an ability and/or advantage for that matter).

11. Autistic people are great at STEM (Science Technology Engineering Math) classes. No. Although I especially excel with math and loved Algebra and Calculus, not everyone does. Some of us are great when it comes to STEM courses, but others of us struggle. Not all of us are even remotely interested in STEM, as well. Some of us prefer the arts, labor-intensive activities (i.e. construction), et cetera. We all have our different strong suits.

12. All autistics are savants. Some are, some aren’t. Although we all have special interests, most aren’t savants, actually. I don’t know where I fall when it comes to being a savant or not, but I’m not some super-genius. I didn’t invent some new scientific thing when I was 12 nor did I make a groundbreaking discovery. I do want to do something great with my future career, but I don’t know if I’ll ever be worthy of stardom and fame or be labeled as a savant.

The one thing I dislike is how people dismiss the existence of savants because they hate the stereotype. Autistic savants do exist, as do non-autistic savants, and saying that they don’t is harmful. Stereotypes come from somewhere, right? Savants exist and they deserve representation and appreciation too.

13. Autistic people don’t have relationships and moments of intimacy. Yes, they do. I personally don’t want a relationship right now nor do I want to engage in such intimate acts, but others do.

14. Autism kills marriages. This myth was made widespread by the infamous organization Autism $peaks. Sure, it may end some marriages, but why marry someone who is autistic then? If you truly loved the person then, you would accept them, autism and all.

15. Nonverbal autistics are all intellectually disabled. Although some are, not all are. A handful are highly intelligent. Autism isn’t a one size fits all thing.

16. Autistic people can’t do anything on their own/will never be independent. Some autistics won’t be able to be independent, but not all. Others don’t need any support while some, like me, need minimal support. People with all sorts of aid requirements exist on the autism spectrum. Each of us needs differing levels of support; also, especially so if one also has a chronic illness, some days I will be able to be completely independent, but the next day I may need lots of external support.

17. Having an autistic child is a tragedy. Yes, autism does make things more challenging, but there’s a silver lining in it. Like every other child, autistics are capable of great things and have talents. If people would just look past the struggles, label, and faults then, they’ll see an amazing person who isn’t just a diagnosis, but a fully fledged human being.

18. Autistic people are just rude. On honesty, we are not trying to be rude when saying the truth. In our brains, it is something that is acceptable to say. Many of us thrive on being honest as our brains tend to rely on logic more than anything else. By pointing out the size of your nose, we’re not trying to be rude. Personally, I don’t really struggle with being too honest, but sometimes I do say things aloud that shouldn’t be said. I just think of it as uttering an observation; I have no rude intents. When I am trying to be rude, you will know XD.

On conversational difficulties, it’s not that we don’t want to talk to you, it’s that we don’t know how to continue and/or initiate conversations. Not all autistics struggle a lot when it comes to social communication, but some do. Those who do, we just don’t know how to go about conversing “as normal”. We can’t help it. We’re not being rude. I struggle to continue and start conversations, which has led to many people thinking that I don’t like them. If you want to have a proper, lengthy conversation with me then, you have to start it and be able to keep it going.

On eye contact, we don’t mean to seem rude by not looking you in the eye when talking. For me, maintaining eye contact is distracting, which means that my focus is being directed away from what you’re saying, making me not able to adequately listen to you. Some autistics have little to no problems with eye contact.

19. “You don’t have to stim. Therefore, you’re just doing it to annoy me.” For me, it takes a lot of courage for me to feel comfortable with stimming around you. So, by ridiculing me for doing something that soothes me, you’re furthering my insecurity about it and hurting me. People who stim do it to self-soothe and to regulate themselves. Would you rather I shutdown (go nonverbal), experience sensory overload, or even have a meltdown? I don’t think so. Let people stim. Some of us don’t stim, but it is a lifeline for some of us.

20. “You don’t look autistic.” Well, riddle me this: What does autism look like to you? Apparently, we have completely different views on what an autistic person looks like. For me, an autistic person is anyone (a friend, neighbor, family member, student, teacher etc.) from any walk of life of any religion, lifestyle, culture, etc. The “autism look” is the generic person to me. Is there a specific way we should look, though? Please tell me more about your vision of how an autistic person outwardly appears.

I could go on about this subject for hours, but I’ll stop myself here. If you want me to debunk more myths and/or react to certain common sayings/stereotypes then, please leave a message in my ask box. I really, really, really! want to write more about this topic.

[nerdygaymormon]

I'm... scared... of your blog. It goes against a whole lot of what I was taught to believe and follow growing up. But, at the same time, I've been hurt deeply by that... doctrine... and I've only just begun to see and understand the extent of that damage. So... what if this is what my wounded and weeping soul has been searching for... since I can't pick up any "official text" without having a violent physical reaction that is drowning in pain and fear? 1/?

I can't even get near a chapel or temple without reacting. And I can't bring myself to confide in any of my local bishopric or ward members. As a result, I've been suffering alone. I know I need therapy because this is some deep, messed up shit, but I have not been able to find a compassionate professional and I'm not want to continue the search. I've neither the funds nor the energy. 2/?

I'm 34yo born and raised in the Church. Three years ago I experienced something that made me question heavily whether Gd still loved me because I for sure felt damned. And that event caused the floodgates to open, I suppose. I've not been active for years due to chronic illness and being treated like some sort of sub-human because of my disability. I used to maintain a current temple recommend but not anymore. 3/?

I think I'm asexual. And the more and more I think about this, the more and more it explains some aspects of me that I thought were broken. (No desire to date as a teen, no feelings of sexual attraction to anyone, confusion about terms like "infatuation" and "crush", confused and disgusted by sex and the world's obsession with it.) But, at the same time, the more and more I grew to like this term, the worse my feeling of being Rejected by Gd became. 4/? 

But, even before I adopted the term, I began to feel unwanted and damned because of a history of attempted molestation at 5 years old and being taught that I was 'chewed gum' amongst other doctrines that insisted that my every decision and move was responsible for the sexual purity of the male mind. I felt violated in almost everything that I wore that I felt "pretty" in because I was under the belief I was a walking sin. 5/?

I say I'm scared of your blog... yet I read through several posts last night, body shaking and nauseous with fear and guilt. And here I am, unloading in your askbox because I'm so desperate for someone to talk to who won't judge me like I've been judged all my life. The last time I went to church, I ran out of Sacrament in tears, hyperventilating in my car for several minutes. I have not been back since. 6/?

I want to believe that I'm still loved. I want to believe that I'm still wanted. There is a vicious war going in within me, complicated by chronic and mental illness, that I've lost my sensitivity concerning Gd. I can't tell if or when He's talking to me because the constant anxiety, fear and pain drown out the more 'subtle' emotions. And the maladaptive coping mechanisms I've developed likely don't help either... 7/?

Thank you for listening... if you have anything insightful that you think might help, I'd like to read it. (I hope all these messages stayed anonymous...) 8/8

———————————————————————

Wow, the feels. You said so much. I recognize you’re in a hard place. 

—————————  

Don’t worry, you managed to stay anonymous. I know when sending multiple asks it’s to forget to push the anon option.

—————————  

Congrats on figuring out you are asexual (ace). 

I think discovering a lack of something is difficult. There’s all these hints along the way but then once you figure it out, it all makes sense, everything fits.  

Don’t be afraid to change your labels. We use words to describe how we understand ourselves. If the way you understand yourself changes, it’s fine to change your labels. 

—————————  

Having a chronic illness can be difficult, it can take over a life as you organize things around it. Having a disability also can be challenging, especially if it’s one that is visible to others because they often view you as your disability. 

The thing is, you have a personality that wants to be displayed, I can tell that just from these messages you sent me. As people spend time with you and get to know you, they will start seeing you and not your disability. 

—————————  

Things that you described about your feelings and reactions make me believe therapy would help. I’m no mental health professional, but I wonder if you have have the symptoms of PTSD (church caused you trauma) and an anxiety disorder. 

If you have insurance that will cover some sessions, look for a provider that takes your insurance. If you don’t, I know that therapy can be expensive. 

About 2 years ago I needed to see a therapist and I checked at my local university. They had a psychological services clinic where Ph.D. students could gain experience, so the price was reduced, and my therapy was overseen by professors who are up-to-date in their field.  

If you can’t get to therapy now, and if you want to go to church, it helps a lot to have someone you know that can go with you, like a security blanket. It makes it less scary to enter that space. 

If you don’t have someone like that, try contacting the missionaries, explain you haven’t been to church in a while but want to come back. They will be so happy to greet you in the lobby and have you sit with them. And if you want, they will introduce you around to others. 

—————————  

Tbh, I was very surprised at how you describe my blog. I didn’t realize someone would view it the way you did. 

It’s true that I think our church is wrong on LGBTQIA+ topics. This is because of a few things:

1) I feel the spirit let me know that God loves me as I am, a gay man, and that I’m not broken. This is how I’m meant to be. 

2) What we learn about our Heavenly Parents and how they love us and are fair and just, and they treat us the same and view humankind as alike. I can’t believe they would set up a whole group of their children to fail and not have a path to return to them.

3) Jesus stood with those who were on the margins, He spent time lifting others and taught us that real religion is helping others, especially those who are downtrodden and on the margins. 

4) The Church doesn’t show LGBTQIA+ people as a part God’s Plan. The Church doesn’t know what to do with us. And it’s not a good space for queer people so most LGBTQIA+ members leave. This is not good fruit and it’s not what I think God would want, for whole groups of people to not feel welcomed.

I don’t reject the principles of the gospel, I want them to apply to all of us, even me, a gay man, and even you, an asexual woman. We are beautiful, we have a purpose, we deserve to be accepted and have joy. 

I guess that is rebellious and dangerous because it challenges the Church’s narrative about people like you and me. 

I let people in church tell me terrible things and for so long I believed them. I don’t anymore. 

Refusing the shame that church gives us as queer people, that’s radical. Church is supposed to help us be better, not wear us down. 

You can love yourself and be happy as ace. This is part of how God made you, you don’t have to deny this is how you experience life. 

—————————

What are your goals? What kind of person do you want to be? What do you want your life to be like? 

My psychologist used to have me write what I would like my life to be like, and then we made goals to start doing those. 

You are capable of change. 

This is your life. 

God has given you talents. We’re not supposed to hide them under a bushel. Work on developing them and developing yourself. 

You are your own longest investment. Investing in yourself is a gift to the world, it’s how we develop ourselves and increases our capacity to help others.

—————————

I hope you feel I understood what you were trying to say to me. 

I also hope I gave you some things to think about, to ponder, and figure out what feels right to you.

[euphoriacrossing]

The closer we get the more my anxiety plays up...

What if I can't keep up with my journal that I worked so hard on?

What if I mess up something I can't change on my island? (I don't WANT to have to reset, but if it's the first day i will... i don't want to have to reset two or three days in because i change my mind about something...)

And the bigger ones.... I've been so tired I can barely stay awake two or three hours at a time. I can't do a whole lot of recreational things because I'm asleep. Right now I'm attributing it to depression, but I am going to ask my oncologist if maybe the meds could cause it (the meds I DID stop, but thay messed with my hormones anyway) or if the slight bit of anemia I have could cause it maybe? What if I am not awake enough to fully enjoy the game?

I go to the oral surgeon I think for a consultation to get some teeth pulled, what if he wants to do it anytime soon after the game is out? Will it mess with my enjoybility to have that kind of procedure? (Last time I had teeth out... my wisdom teeth I did very poorly, I got two dry sockets and was in some of the worst pain... I was LUCKY to be able to sleep as much as I did, because the pain was awful. And I followed instructions, so I don't know if I am more prone to those kinds of things or if it was the fact he didn't tell me to stop my birth control or what... but it was bad. And now I have a much higher tolerance to pain meds and will have to use the ones I'm ON so they'll be less effective probably. I'll die if I get a dry socket. Pain tolerance, mine is high until you get to my mouth and then I'm an absolute crybaby.) So say he wants to do it the Monday after... will I be out of commission to play for two weeks or more while I recover? I know this sounds more important, but to me the game is important, too. I want to be able to put in at least some work daily for quite a while so I can create a beautiful island at the same time others who start on the 20th are. So it may not seem like a huge deal, but it is to me okay? Enough of a huge deal for my anxiety to use it against me.

Those are just examples though. I have an anxiety disorder which in past years has become more generalized and entwined with my bipolar symptoms. So I am in no short supply of things related to the 20th to be anxious about.

I wish I could just be happy. And I mean, I am. We have less than a week and I'll be playing a game that is 7 years in the making for those of us that play Animal Crossing. I've been waiting with baited breath probably more than a year, to the point where when Pokemon Sw/Shld came out it was just a distraction instead of the main event, at that point I was already craving New Horizons desperately. And here we are nearly at the end of our waiting, I am happy, don't get me wrong.

But my mind never just let's me be happy.

What if I am too late to make friends in the first few days like I've planned? Everyone else seems to already have their friendships, but I knew I couldn't keep up with a friendship that long. So here is the week to make friends, and I don't feel I know how, or I feel like most people already have their friends. I have maybe two people besides my sister to play with. And I'm excited for that. But I'd love to be included in a larger group of friends or something, you know, that sort of thing is nice. If I only have a few close friends though, that'd be nice too. And i think the first few days it seems people might just be playing on their own, i don't always NEED someone to play with, I'll probably prefer to play alone, or maybe with my sister mostly, or just my close friend when I play. But it's just i guess i expected to use this opportunity to make more friends and now i feel i am wasting it. I don't often have such an "easy way" to make friends because I am disinterested in most things and just don't have a lot to talk about. This common interest is an amazing thing to talk about and should make things easier, but it doesn't as much as I hoped I guess.

What if I don't finish my journal? I worked so hard on it, but i need my dad's help with the label maker and need to finalize the decisions about what I'm going to record in it before I do make the labels. It can still be changed later because I am using labels on plastic tabs and a discbound journal but what if I don't have time once i'm playing?

Ugh. Just all the "what ifs". And I know some people will think "why'd she bother making this post?" Well random person, it does help to get them out in the open. Since most everything I have been thinking has been AC related lately, this has turned into a bit of a personal blog. Sorry for that. I do plan to make it a New Horizons blog and post as much original content as I can once ACNH is out.

Oh another one. What if posting original content is too hard?

Like, I want this blog to have original content and all that, but if you have to remove your memory card and get on a computer to do it, that's a lot of trouble and extra energy I don't have these days. And you had to do that for New Leaf and everyone did including myself, but I had more energy and it seemed easier. And it seems like it was less effort those days because people DID THINGS on the computer including myself. Now I use my phone and ipad as computers, you can do almost all the same things on them, and my laptop sits idle which might be the reason it doesn't run as well these days. Or it may just be that it's old as crap for a laptop. I mean, I guess it's moderately old for what it is, it's a very nice laptop, but I think it's the same one I had for New Leaf so it's been with me a while. Anyway, it SEEMED like less trouble because you were on the computer doing stuff anyway, so just pop your memory card in there and go while you're checking your stuff. It's not that easy on a phone, BUT I am hoping you can post photos and screenshots to SOMETHING through the Nooklink app. We don't know everything about the app yet as it isnt out yet, and I doubt you can post straight to tumblr (though that'd make things easy, huh?) because this is not the most used platform anymore, but if I can post them to anywhere (like facebook or twitter... I'd probably post them privately to facebook because I am less versed in twitter stuff, but then I did recently become an AC twitter on my personal twitter because I never used my personal twitter anyway, so... yeah...) I can grab them on my phone once they are uploaded and reupload them here. But I also plan to make my "diary like" text posts here. I am not recording a diary in my journal having to do with NH, I only want like... data and information I can use, etc. But that doesn't mean I won't want to write diary like entries, and I am less likely to lose my blog that a physical journal anyway it feels. (I say less likely... I lost my New Leaf blog for a few years there, but with effort I did recently find it.) So it could be very easy to post original content here, or if the app doesn't do things it really totally should, then it might be a bit more effort and I don't know if I have that to give right now, so I'm nervous about that. Everything I post here about my game experience is going to be more for me to look back on than anything, so I WANT to be able to post about that stuff here. But I guess we'll have to wait to see, along with waiting for the game.

And everyone knows how well waiting and anxiety get along. They are two peas in a pod, they play off each other like it's no one's business.

But I hope everything in the end will just be okay. I am "lucky" in a way. Since I'm chronically ill, disabled, and have cancer, I don't have work or school to worry about and while being sick is a big bummer, that does take a lot of stress off of me. I don't know how I would handle a job or school even just mentally these days, I don't see how it could go well and I guess that is because I am so sick, even just mentally... but I know a lot of disabled people DO still do those things anyway, sometimes because they HAVE to, so I am glad I am in a position at my age where I am still largely take care of. My disability money doesn't cover a fraction of my necessities, so I feel blessed everyday for my parents, even though my mom and I fight like cats and dogs. Annnndddd now I am getting to be anxious about what happens to me when my parents are gone and that's a WHOLE different type of anxiety... yikes... I need to stop letting my anxiety run rampant now I guess, it's gone too far.

But I am very "lucky" to be in a position where once the game comes out it can be my main focus for a while. Partially because i don't have the energy to focus on many different things, so it's good Animal Crossing can take up that main spot in my life for now.

Come on now, back to AC anxieties. Ya stupid general anxiety...

And I guess I am anxious about the typical things people are anxious about... what fruit will I get, will I like my first Islanders, etc. but to me those things arent as major. All the fruits are so pretty I could really get on with any of them I think, and hopefully my first villagers will be great, but I'll make myself a net if they're not, and I do have amiibo cards for moving in some of my favorite villagers later on, so I can deal with a dud or two.

I'm a little anxious about map layouts too, just picking the right one seems a little difficult to me since there are some things you cannot change. But I think I can make a good choice, I'm more worried if I'll be able to draw it in for my journal or not. I should draw the general layout for the map, but I don't even know if I can do that right.

Oh I also have a package to finish working on and get in the mail before Friday, BUT I finished the hardest parts (writing a bunch of postcards, basically a latter's worth of text but on postcards) last night, so I just have to do finishing touches and get it out. I maybe want to type another letter to send out, too, but if I don't get it done I'll try not to beat myself up. I got really burnt out on mail stuff lately and as much as I still get, which is about one or two things in the mail daily, I can't reply to all the things I should. I'm stressed about it, but I won't let that ruin my New Horizons time. Especially since mail was supposed to be a fun hobby for me and just... stopped. But that's a whole different thing, that has less to do with New Horizons than the other stuff.

Now I genuinely do feel less stressed since I rambled on for a while. Thanks for reading this, if you read any of it. I don't expect anyone to read all this anxiety inducing, depressing junk.

But anyway, now I am going to try and think about the Nooklink app and what kind of features I think it should have. Like I said, it really should have a way to post screenshots/pictures to social media, and I bet it's got something like that since we have the camera in game. I bet we maybe even can post pictures to social media from the switch. I mean, well, I know we can technically, but I mean I bet we can without having to leave the game. Because you can do that in New Leaf now. Gosh would that have been handy YEARS ago. I guess it came with the "welcome amiibo" update?

But at least we know we can scan in QR codes. I dunno if you've noticed but I have been collecting some and tagging them (you can find them under the "QR" tag on my blog, or by type of QR code, likes dresses I just tagged "dress") so I have them once we are able to use them in game. I am going to check my @playtimewithmadi blog to see if I have QR codes saved that I used in New Leaf, too, so I can reblog any good ones here. All of that gives me something to do, I suppose.

I could also work on my journal, or my mail. Both need to get done before Friday and need work.

But honestly, I am probably gonna play Happy Home Designer right now. I'll design at least one house, and then maybe I'll work on my mail and journal stuff. We'll see.

Anyway, thanks again for sticking with me, I love everyone who stays subbed to this blog even though the BS posts like this. Sorry for rambling on, but I needed this, so thank you for letting me have it.

Off to more distraction then...

[spoonie-living]

[Image: A clipboard with pain scale and other forms, with pen hovered over. Credit: Rawpixel]

Find The Right Scale For Your Symptoms Pain & Symptom Scales Masterpost

Folks, describing your symptoms can be an everloving nightmare—especially when most doctors have nothing but a 1-10 pain scale for you to rate them with.

Instead of (or in addition to!) carrying around a calculator and a thesaurus, try these scales on for size. They aren’t just numbers; they are concepts and words meant to make your experience easier to explain. We’ll also list some great additions to the scales that will help you describe your symptoms way better.

We’ll continue to update this post as more scales show up on our radar, so click here for the latest.

Core Scales

Lots of these can be used for different symptoms than they were intended, so don’t let the name of the scale put you off!

Functional Pain Scale - Talks about how the pain impacts your ability to function; discusses levels of disability.

Stanford Pain Scale (CN: suicide mention) - Includes descriptions of severity,  some examples of conditions causing similar pain levels, and impact on life and life experience in chronic cases.

Mankoski Pain Scale - Short and sweet descriptions, based on whether or not the pain can be ignored, how it affects concentration and activities, and what level of medication are needed to manage it.

Global Pain Scale - A short survey on pain levels (current, worst, best, etc.), feelings around the pain, ability to do self care, and activity levels. Produces a number on a scale of 0-100.

McGill Pain Index - A scale from 0-50 that lets you compare the pain you’re experiencing to other conditions (childbirth is in the 30s, while CRPS/RSD is around 47). Link goes to a Google image search, as there’s a lot of different interpretations you can check out.

McGill Pain Questionnaire - Has you select words that best represent and categorize your pain. This questionnaire covers the type of pain, how it moves through your body, and how it makes you feel, among other things. Abbreviated and long version available.

Wong-Baker FACES Pain Rating Scale - That one. Usually considered to be unhelpful, particularly with autistic folks who have trouble recognizing facial expressions---but can be useful if you’re having cognitive trouble.

Hyperbole And A Half Pain Scale (CN: bleeding/body horror) - A parody of the FACES scale that’s both funny and remarkably effective. Has facial expressions with text descriptions (10 is “actively being mauled by a bear”).

Visual Analogue Scale - Rather than numbers, this scale is just a line that lets you visually select where you are on a spectrum. There may be labels and additional ticks/benchmarks along the line to help. This is useful if numbers aren’t really your thing.

Color Scale - Another alternative to numbers, this scale has you select a color from a spectrum ranging from blue (0) to red (10).

Impact of Chronic Pain Scale - Scored assessment based on ways and frequency your chronic pain has impacted you. Click the [View] button at the top to see the assessment after reading instructions.

Make your own! - Making your own scale is always an option, and especially useful if you’ll be tracking your symptoms. Just make sure to write it down so it’s easy to check your work and share with others. Need something to work with? The Randall pain scale has prompts for a DIY scale here, and @ShadyQuotesForHealthFitness lays out their really great system for different symptom types and experiences here.

Simple Mental Health Pain Scale - A very necessary scale created by a patient, with in-depth descriptions of each level. (via @AutismSerenity)

Fatigue Scale - Simple patient-made scale. Scroll to last item in article for image.

Functional Ability Scale - Made for ME/CFS patients, but good for most chronic fatigue.

Companion Scales

Use these to add another dimension to the information you’re trying to communicate.

Distress level - How much distress is your pain causing? Original post with more thoughts here.

Coping ability - How well are you able to cope with your symptoms? Suggested by @ramblingandpie​ in response to Distress post.

Discomfort - In response to our Distress post, @mcpeaceteach​ mentioned that discomfort ought to get its own scale, since it can really, really drive you off the deep end (consider what nausea does to you).

How someone else would rate it - You might consider your pain a 4, but someone else who hasn’t gotten used to its annoying thrumming might rate it a 7. Try phrasing as “for someone else it would be x, but since I’m used to it it’s x.”

NOTE: If your doctor can’t cope with two variables, you might consider doing what @queendeepsigh does and averaging them to come up with a more effective response to the pain scale question.

Add-ons

Try these in addition to a single number on a scale!

What you want to do to deal - @someriverinidaho​ says “I say what I want to be doing to deal with the pain. Like: ‘it’s a three and I wanna go home,’ or ‘it’s a five I want to be unconscious.’”

How many years you’d trade - Hank Green suggests expressing your pain by how many years you’d trade off of your life to make it stop (via @jenack-jarpad).

Pain subtypes - this patient-authored list includes a few extra-creative ones like industrial pain, “gotta/wanna do that” pain, and “back off” pain.

OLD CARTS, SOCRATES, and PQRST - old mneumonics for describing aspects of pain, but elements may also be used to describe other symptoms.

Caution

From @gods-and-punks:

Remember, at least for my experience in American Emergency Care, always rate your emergency’s pain 7 or higher or you won’t be prioritized.  My sister’s concussion almost didn’t get seen because she was so out of it that she said “3″ for pain, even though she was severely concussed.

Related

Words Matter When Talking About Pain With Your Doctor (NPR Shots)

Pain Scale tag

Chronic Pain tag

Dealing with Doctors tag

Sources

15 Pain Scales (And How To Find The Best Pain Scale For You) (PainDoctor)

Responses to Add Distress To Your Pain Scale (Spoonie Living)

[ohhippiehavoc-blog]

Home Cleaning With Alkaline Water

This may be something I'd like to get eventually. The health sector just like any other industry too can benefit greatly from this amazing tech tool. As an industry we want and need to take part in finding long-term solutions to ensure that the problem is stopped. To use the GFR calculator, you need to enter weight, age, gender, race and serum creatinine values. Thank God you don't think I need them. So I have a fondness for crocheting but I am still no rocket scientist but your piece has bought back to mind the years of my mother's majesty and I can not think of it without thinking of her. Have fun crocheting some of the patterns. You have a nice friend that she gave you that. The pharmaceutical drug industry argues that would also have opened up a “Pandora’s box” of problems—particularly safety issues—as tons of new and cheaper drugs flooded the market from Europe and Canada. In Canada you can buy refills at many local drug stores or grocery stores. Wouldn't that prevent the gasket/seals to go bad after two refills. If you have internet facility then you can get online help. Hi, I have tried several ways to get the liquid soap dispensed, Right now, soap leaked to the bottom, on the counter but not thru the dispenser, like it should. The person may feel very giddy when attempting to sit up, may have an intense headache around the forehead, and his or her scalp may feel sensitive to the touch. As the Lysol Healthy Touch product line already includes an instant hand sanitizer product, we will probably see the development of a high-quality instant had sanitizer refill for the Lysol No-Touch. In standard usage, one refill will perform about 166 dispenses. Unsure whether anyone else is on the line yet, the female caller throws out the first question: "You got gang stalking or V2K?" she asks no one in particular. She had to go for 4 hours dialysis process at the hospital every alternate day, for toxic waste and water to be extracted out from her body system due to the chronic failures of her kidneys. You avoid these foods to avoid gout attacks, but your body cannot function properly without protein - meats and seafood are common sources of protein! Being liquid, wheat grass nutrition is rapidly assimilated by the body. Dec 12, 2016. A new study finds a link between regular use of the common NSAID ibuprofen and reduced risk of lung cancer death for current and former. Mortenson LE. The off-label debate: a threat to the future of cancer care. What problems are caused by off-label drug use? The bill also includes tougher penalties for drug companies that commit fraud and bans the practice of brand name drugmakers paying competitors to keep lower-priced generic substitutes off the market. The FDA requires stringent rules prior to approving a medication, this in turn costs the drug companies millions of dollars, who then pass the cost on to the consumer. Therefore, the FDA has crafted an entire suite of web pages that help manufacturers of unapproved drugs navigate the regulatory landscape, canada drugs online Unapproved Drugs: Drugs Marketed in the United States That Do Not Have Required FDA Approval. Be sure to analyze for yourself the information we have gathered and presented in recent days. Exceptions are if you have reached age 65 or withdraw due to death or disability. Over The Counter (OTC) Analgesics or pain killers are drugs that act at different levels of the pain transmission pathway. Prescription drugs can be legal and prescribed by a family physician. Arizona residents, snowbirds from the states and Canada flock to Los Algodones, Mexico for low cost dental work, prescription eyeglasses and prescription drugs. For Storing Treasure: Dogs who like bones often bury them for safekeeping and to dig up later. Typically, individuals who are faking mental illness go for the typical Hollywood presentation. In this article published in September 2008 issue of “Alternative Medicine Review,” the authors found that vitamins A and C are useful for preventing urinary tract infections, while potassium salts help reduce painful urination associated with urinary tract infections. Finding a medicine that gives fulfilling rest without genuine symptoms can be testing. When it comes to food items, savings on generic brands vs. Your HSA must be maintained by a qualified third party, such as a bank, credit union, or savings and loan. 10 with Lysol coupons. Is it the right amount?

[bigbluebarns-blog]

ABLEISM REDUX

Well… There are so many different dimensions of disability that people can be ableist toward those with different disabilities than their own. …And it’s only in the last couple of generations (within my lifetime, at least) that Disability Rights groups have banded together in a common cause (Rather than, say: Rights groups for the blind working only for the blind, Rights groups for Cerebral Palsy working only for Cerebral Palsy, etc.).  Matter of fact, based on my own recollections, I think working together for universal access rights only really got any steam in the 1970s – when I was already a teenager.

Confession time: until relatively recently (like, the last 10 years, or so), as a physically disabled person, I was biased against those with intellectual disabilities, and would get quite insulted if anyone mistakenly thought I was “R

—–ed.”

@theborkplanet IDK HOW TO SEPARATE MY COMMENTS FROM YOURS AND COMMENTS FROM YOURS. HENCE THE CAPS. 

I WAS ALSO BIASED AND PROBABLY STILL AM SOMEWHAT, TOWARD PPL WITH INTELLECTUAL DISABILITIES(ID). I TOO USED THE R WORD. GROWING UP MY EXP WITH PPL W/ ID WERE NEGATIVE OR GROSS, AND NO ONE EVER BOTHERED TO EXPLAIN SOMEONE’S ID TO ME, SO ALL I KNEW WAS NEGATIVE BEHAVIORS EG JO GRABS STUFF AND SCREAMS; NO ONE EVER EXPLAINED HER AUTISM. MOE HAS DOWNS SYNDROME, IS OBSESSED WITH SAYING “BOOBIES” LOVES THE EFFING BEACH BOYS AND FARTS A LOT AND NEVER SHUTS UP; HOW ANNOYING; NO ONE EVER TOLD ME ABOUT PERSEVERATING, OR THAT DS CAN CAUSE GI PROBS SOMETIMES. AL MUTTERS, HE STINKS, AND HE KNOCKED OUT HIS AIDE SO I’M AFRAID THAT AL WILL GET ANGRY WITH ME AND KNOCK ME OUT; NO ONE EVER EXPLAINS HIS CONDITION, SO I GLEAN MY INFO FROM EAVESDROPPING and RUMORS. THE ABLE-BODIED ADULTS DIDN’T BOTHER TO PROMOTE UNDERSTANDING EVEN THO WE WERE ALL TRAPPED ON THE SAME SPECIAL ED BUS, SO THE PASSENGERS WITHOUT ID TALK SMACK ABOUT THE ONES WITH ID. THE ONE TIME I ASK, “WHAT’S AL HAVE?” ABLEBODIED ADULT SHAMES ME FOR ASKING AND BLATHERS ABOUT CONFIDENTIALITY. NOT TRYING TO JUSTIFY MY PREJUDICE; JUST RELATING EXP. I’M ALSO WORKING THRU IT BUT U R RIGHT; NEVER 100% DONE. 

I’m working through it, and like to think I’m getting better (and one huge part of that is learning just how deep and intertwined institutionalized ableism really is, in our societies). But as with being a White woman dealing with racism, I have to remember that it’s a case of continuing recovery, and not something I will ever be 100% over and done with.

Thanks for sharing, @aegipan-omnicorn. You’re lovely.

@bigbluebarns, I don’t personally know anything about suffering racism, being a white american myself. However, I do know a thing or two about suffering ableism, both at the hands of able-bodied people, and disabled people.

People are incredibly social animals and will band together in groups with other similar people. This is natural, and it is good. It can be healing and cathartic to hang out with people who “get it.” But this tendency can also have an extremely dark side, as we see with “isms.” This is going to get long, so I’m going to break it here in consideration of people’s dashboards. Again, I can only speak to ableism and sexism so please keep that in mind.

OMG, I LOVE THESE NAMES AND TRADEMARKS. DID U INVENT THEM?

Ableisms I have suffered at the hands of disabled people:

The Cripple Police™: These are the people who, in an overzealous bid for limited access available, arbitrarily decide who is disabled enough to use a mobility aid, bathroom stall, parking spot, and even sometimes the label of “disabled.” If you are not Crippled Enough, you can be subject to any form of social punishment they deem to be necessary.

I HATE THE CP AND I’M CONSTANTLY REMINDING PPL THAT U DO NOT HAVE TO APPEAR DISABLED IN ORDER TO USE HANDICAP PARKING. IT’S LIKE THEY WANT U TO WEAR A TAG STATING U R DISABLED SO THEN THEY CAN ASSESS IF U MEET THEIR RANDOM CRITERIA.

Example: I used to be able to walk longer distances with a service dog, but was still a high fall risk. My doctor (a licensed neurologist) prescribed me a parking placard so that none of us had to worry (as much) about me passing out in a parking lot where no one could see me, and getting run over. A lovely woman in a wheelchair, who just happened to park in the accessible spot next to me, proceeded to scream at me and my service dog all the way into the store. A manager rescued me by going along with my ruse of knowing him, and invited me into the back were I fucking hid away until they told me she had left the store. It. Was. Scary.

EGAD SOUNDS HORRIBLE. BUT YEAH THERE IS A DISABILITY HIERARCHY

The Born This Ways™ : The experience between people who were born disabled, and who acquired disability later in life, vary a great deal from one another. BTW ableist types actively minimize the experiences of other disabled people, simply because they hadn’t been baptized since birth by xyz. In other words, the suffering was not identical to their own, thus must be invalid.

Example: I became disabled after adulthood, and tried to find solace after being subjected to ableist responses from friends and family members who were unable to cope with the “broken me.” I found lots of great disabled people who helped me, but I also found people who routinely scoffed at my experiences, again informing me that I was not “disabled enough,” and suggested I was being deliberately weak, or histrionic. Sometimes it was almost eerily word for word what my ableist friends/family said. How strange…

I’VE SEEN THE ACQUIRED DISABILITY IS BETTER. TM ADIBS MIGHT IMPLY, “WELL I’M A QUAD, BUT AT LEAST I GOT TO EXP BEING ABLEBODIED; I’LL HAVE EXP U SADSACK LOSER BTWS WILL NEVER HAVE. I GOT TO BE NORMAL FOR A WHILE” MOST OFTEN I SAW IT COME FROM PARALYZED PPL WHO WISHED THEY COULD WALK AGAIN. I WAS BORN WITH CP AND AB PPL ACTUALLY ASKED ME “WOULD U RATHER BE BTW OR AD?” BEFORE I THOUGHT ABOUT IT, I SAID “BTW, CUZ THATS ALL I KNOW AND I’VE HAD IT FROM DAY1 FALSE EQUIVALENCY WHEREAS ADIBS HAVE TO ADJUST” NOW THO I KNOW THAT EVEN I AS BTW HAVE HAD TO ADJUST TO CHANGING SYMPTOMS. DO U WANT 2 BE A TREE OR A MOUSE...UHHH...FALSE EQUIVALENCY ALERT, CAN’T COMPAPARE APPLE N ORANGE.

The Faker Police™: I think anyone with an invisible illness has experience with this one. This is when people who “look disabled” refuse to believe someone who “does not look disabled,” and proceed to treat them as hysterical attention seekers instead of…well, anyone else. These people often practice double ableisms–I have noticed that many also tend to judge Disabled Enough based on mobility aids. Then, they try to chase the “fakers” out of the community, because everyone knows “fakers” are why we have additional burdens added (like further hurdles to access, government aid, etc).

ALSO IF U HAVE AN INVISIBLE DISABILITY LIKE YOURS AND ME ALSO, I SEE THE “WELL EVERYONE GETS DEPRESSED/SAD/TIRED.” I END UP FEELING LIKE I HAVE JUSTIFY THE DISABLING NATURE OF MY DEPRESSION/ANXIETY TO A WEG. 

Example: Before my condition had progressed to me needing a mobility aid, I was already facing discrimination in the workplace. I requested an accommodation to have the crappy fluorescent lights removed from above my desk, as they provoke bad neurological symptoms. You’d think it was a little thing, but when I asked for advice on dealing with skeptical and belligerent management, I met the same reactions in some disabled people, followed immediately by “Fakers like you are why we see knee-jerk reactions like the word ‘no!’ Come complain when you’re actually disabled and need to have a ramp installed! Until then suck it up!”

The Totally Qualified Disability Judges™: This one seems to arise from the natural tendency of people to compare their situations to the situations of others. If they arbitrarily judge another person’s situation to be better or more favorable, then that person is not As Disabled, or Disabled Enough, or Disabled At All. Then, based on that judgment, they try to socially punish the condemned, or to excommunicate them.

Example: Some conditions are really straightforward and don’t vary widely. People with the condition all seem to have similar limitations. My condition is the exact opposite of that. I have the chronic form of migraine disease. Lots of people get migraines, but not all of them have more than 15 a month, and migraines can last anywhere from a few hours to three days. To some people, pain is the most disabling feature of a migraine, to others, the accompanying neurological weirdness is. (Migraines are often proceeded by cortical spreading depression, a phenomenon also exhibited in epilepsy. Just for an example).

So, when people hear what my condition is, they remember that one lady they used to know who had to lay in the dark for a couple days each month, and wonder why the hell I’m in a wheelchair. It doesn’t make sense to them (who cares that migraines don’t make sense to the most brilliant neurologists in the world), so they decide that I just must not be disabled. Or, if I am, it’s hypochondria. 

 I’VE SEEN: YEAH HAVE U TRIED XYZ CURE? IT REALLY HELPED THAT 1 LADY. IF U DON’T TRY XYZ WELL THEN UR LAZY N ALSO PROBABLY FAKING THE EXTENT OF UR DISABILITY?

Fun fact: Internalizing ableism from medical doctors, and from some close friends and family, and THEN the disabled people I came into contact with later, and from whom I seeked guidance, prompted so much self doubt that I had a licensed psychologist work me up for hypochondria and other related psychological conditions. It…turns out that I am not a hypochondriac. I could not find relief from all of these experiences until I encountered a neurologist familiar with my condition, and fellow disabled people who have been around the block, and who are not so embittered by their experiences that they deigned to expose others to the same.

For that reason, I will always be vocally critical of ableism within our community. I will not sugar coat it, nor will I flatter ableist disableds by giving them another name. That goes for my own ableism, too. Now that I have worked through a lot of my own, I can use my aids with confidence and obtain a freedom that is at least emotionally similar to the one I had when I first formed my adult identity (which was as an abled person).

AH YES, IN MY CASE, INTERNALIZED ABLEISM=ANXIETY N DEPRESSION. STILL NOT SURE IF DISABLED PPL CAN BE TECHNICALLY DISABLED BUT THAT’S JUST LINGUISTIC SEMANTICS.

CLEAERLY WE BOTH KNOW DISABLED PPL ARE CAPABLE OF ASSHOLERY.

CAN SOMEONE TELL ME HOW TO BOLD TEXT IN POSTS? #TUMBLR NOOB

For an example of sexism from women, see my post Never Underestimate Old Women, in which an old lady cashier schools us for self-righteous activism.

Thanks for the discussion!

[actuallyadhd]

Have you heard of the seven types of adhd? And what do you think of it?

Hello friend!

Personally, I think the seven types is not useful. It doesn’t specify all, there are way more ‘types’. It doesn’t work well becuase there may be a mix of the types. It just sets out types that personally feels pressuring that we have to fit under a label. Nobody has the same exact issues as another, may be similar, but not the same. That is my take on it. - B

I agree with B. My reading of the seven types is that they really describe different types of things. Because I am procrastinating on going to bed, I’ll break it down for you. (The information about the seven types is coming directly from Dr Amen’s web site. Note that the only thing I find helpful about Amen is the ideas in his book Healing ADHD. Aside from that, I think his seven types of ADHD are bogus and SPECT scans are really not a good way to diagnose ADHD.)

This is really long, so I’m putting in a cut.

All types include these “core symptoms”: A short attention span for regular, routine, everyday tasks (homework, chores, etc.); Distractibility; Organization problems (like having a disorganized room and/or always running late); Procrastination; Problems with follow-through; Poor impulse control (saying or doing something before thinking it through).

1. “Classic ADD”---Symptoms include: Inattentive; Easily distracted; Disorganized; Impulsive; Poor follow through; Trouble listening when others talk to them; Making careless mistakes/poor attention to detail; Forgetfulness; Restlessness; Being fidgety; Difficulty awaiting their turn; Act as though driven by a motor; Being noisy; Talking excessively; Interrupting others. The description says that babies are colicky, active, and wiggly; children are restless, talkative, noisy, and demanding.

This reads like Hyperactive/Impulsive ADHD to me.

2. “Inattentive ADD”---Symptoms include: Trouble focusing; Easily distracted; Disorganized; Poor follow through; Trouble listening when others talk to them; Problems with time management; Tendency to lose things; Making careless mistakes; poor attention to detail; Forgetfulness; Excessive daydreaming; Complaints of being bored; Appearing unmotivated or apathetic; Being tired, sluggish or slow moving; Appearing “spacey” or preoccupied. This is the type that is why they refuse to use “ADHD” as the name for the disorder, because not all people who have ADHD are hyperactive. It gets missed because these people don’t cause the problems those with “Classic ADD” cause.

This is definitely Inattentive ADHD. I want to note that technically there is supposed to be a / in the middle, so it’s actually AD/HD, indicating that hyperactivity may or may not be present. But anyway. Pedant and all that.

3. “Over-focused ADD”---Symptoms include: Core symptoms of ADD; Excessive or senseless worrying; Getting stuck in loops of negative thoughts; Oppositional and argumentative; Tendency toward compulsive behaviors; Difficulty seeing options; Excessive worrying; Tendency to hold grudges; Difficulty shifting attention from subject to subject; Tendency to hold onto own opinion and not listen to others; Needing to have things done a certain way or they get upset; May or may not be hyperactive. Apparently the hallmark of this one is hyperfocus. And people who are related to addicts or alcoholics are more likely to have this type.

Considering the fact that most ADHDers hyperfocus, this must be the most common type, right? Not according to Amen. WTF, dude, this is like a hallmark of ADHD. It’s not a necessary thing, but almost all of us hypefocus.

4. “Temporal Lobe ADD”---Symptoms include: Core symptoms of ADD; Memory problems; Auditory processing issues; Irritability; Episodes of quick temper; Periods of spaciness or confusion; Periods of panic and/or fear for no reason; Visual changes such as seeing shadows or objects changing shape; Episodes of déjà vu; Sensitivity or mild paranoia; Headaches or abdominal pain of uncertain origin; History of head injury; Dark thoughts (may involve suicidal or homicidal thoughts); Possible learning disabilities; May or may not be hyperactive. As you see in the list of symptoms, this is the type found in people with brain injury.

I’m going to leave aside the stuff about brain injury, because it’s a known fact that brain injury can cause a lot of ADHD symptoms, and in some cases stimulant medication can be really helpful. Instead, let’s look at the fact that the list of emotion-related symptoms are incredibly common among all ADHDers. I’m also not sure how having a learning disorder can be a symptom of ADHD. Comorbid, definitely. But a symptom? Nah, that’s weird.

5. “Limbic ADD”---Symptoms include: Core symptoms of ADD; Moodiness; Negativity; Low energy; Frequent irritability; Tendency for social isolation; Feelings of hopelessness; Perceived helplessness; Feelings of guilt; Loss of interest in things; Sleep changes (too much or too little); Chronic low self-esteem; May or may not be hyperactive. The SPECT scans show subtle differences between this and depression, so that plus developmental history helps to diagnose.

Sorry not sorry, this sounds like depression and the differences in the SPECT scans (which, as I said at the beginning, are suspect) are probably due to the fact that the person also has ADHD.

6. “Ring of Fire ADD”---Symptoms include: Core symptoms of ADD; Sensitive to noise, light, clothes or touch; Cyclic mood changes (highs and lows); Inflexible rigid thinking; Oppositional; Demanding to have their way; Periods of mean, nasty or insensitive behavior; Periods of increased talkativeness; Unpredictable behavior; Periods of increased impulsivity; Grandiose or “larger than life” thinking; Talks fast; Racing thoughts; Appears anxious or fearful; Irritability; May or may not be hyperactive. This is the one that can be confused with bipolar disorder, but apparently with this type of ADHD you have the behaviour issues all the time. Also, more subtle differences in the SPECT scans.

This sounds like ADHD with comorbid bipolar disorder and sensory processing disorder. The clarifying paragraph talks about “bipolar kids” and to my knowledge, it is incredibly rare for children to have bipolar disorder. It states that adults with bipolar will have mania while those who just have this type of ADHD will not. Given that a lot of these symptoms are pretty common ADHD symptoms regardless of type, I call bull.

7. “Anxious ADD”---Symptoms include: Core symptoms of ADD; Frequently anxious or nervous; Physical stress symptoms such as headaches; Tendency to freeze in social situations; Dislikes or gets excessively nervous speaking in public; Predicts the worse; Conflict avoidant; Fear of being judged. There’s not much else here beyond SPECT scan information.

Anyone else recognize signs of rejection sensitive dysphoria here? RSD is practically universal. Aside from that, you can actually have ADHD plus an anxiety disorder.

So here’s the main problem with this whole idea: while it’s certainly possible (and likely) that the current three types in the DSM-5 are not an accurate sorting method, neither are these seven types. He’s conflating ADHD plus comorbid disorders AND confusing comorbid disorders (and common symptoms of ADHD in general) with symptoms of these specific types.

He says that it’s important to know which type you are so that you can tailor treatment to your type. The whole basis for all of this is the SPECT scans, which show differences in blood flow during concentration. The thing is, we know that the ADHD brain actually develops differently from the non-ADHD brain. Some structures are simply not the same. So I’m not sure if blood flow is even relevant, since it could be related to which brain structures have developed in which ways.

He also says multiple times that since ADHD is different for everyone, there’s not really a one-size-fits-all treatment. While I agree with that, I’m confused about why that means we need more boxes to squeeze us into. I mean, reading the symptoms lists I fit into at least three different types on his list of seven... probably because I have Combined ADHD.

So anyway, that’s the breakdown. I’m sure someone out there has more science about why this is bunk, and I’d love to share if you want to submit the information.

-J

[mistyeyedpea]

I've been feeling so stuck lately.

I ran a fever today, which honestly isn't unusual for me since I get low grade fevers from time to time. My body likes to freak out on me. Because I dont have a ln actual diagnosis for what I go through I feel like it drives me a bit nuts. I tell doctors what I can remember, but honestly I've lived.my whole life thinking most of the things I felt and experienced were normal and doctors are so uninterested, unmotivated and unwilling it makes the mundane task seem so painful. Its even more painful when you tell them for years you have these symptoms and they only write down what they think is necessary enough to explore. The rest is dismissed as being anxious, paranoid, dramatic... its ironic isn't it? How you go to get help and these very people continue to perpetuate the pain and suffering you go through. I wouldn't go down such spirals if I had answers.

The craziest part is when you have been doing research all your life, and having lived experience with chronic physical and mental conditions... but because I appear fine on the outside, to someone who doesn't know a this about me.... to deny me is absurd. I wouldn't designate a label that isn't meant for me, but this ableism in the medic field... it needs to stop. The stigmas need to stop. Doctors need to understand that its okay to not have all the answers. Whats not okay is harming them further by gaslighting, invalidating peoples lived experiences. Where is the compassion?

We as patients, as people, can be highly aware of our issues where as some arent. I happen to be someone who's highly self aware. I observe everything from sensations to what and how I feel... I monitor my own person. I once saw a post that said "having anxiety is being hyperspace of your own existence" and they really hit the nail on the head there. I feel my anxiety stems from be being highly sensitive to what I feel and my surroundings.. I feel anxiety is just a symptom of other conditions...

It drives me crazy that I am only realizing how many signs were missed. How did people not notice? I had to learn to adapt all my life on my own... immersed in it day by day I learned to survive. It hurts me almost everyday. Im learning to let go of this feeling. This feeling that I was a victim of the system that couldn't understand me, rejected me. It made it harder to understand myself throughout the years. But now I understand..

I know that as the years go by and im alive i learn more, and I know that doctors do too.

Despite all I have been through, and still continue to go though, I push through this painful existence hoping one day, ill actually be seen. And that ill be in the hands of a doctor who won't judge me when I tell them my concerns... cause I have many.

I literally stayed up all night the other night cause I couldn't sleep.. trying to remember to document articles of research I find trying to keep them saved on favorites. I often forget how to find the favorites page so I started a notes with the links.

I started doing this in the event a doctor tries to get smart with me... I truly don't have the patience or bandwidth for it anymore. They dont do it in a nice way. They do it in a condescending way. At least the people ive dealt with..

I am a person who was born female so naturally... this is fucking oppressive as is.

I tried talking to my mom about me being Autistic and having adhd, and how im finally accepting it because for years I had "episodes" which i now know, were fucking meltdowns.

I could go on about it, but I dont want to get off topic.

My mother asked me "wow so you finally got diagnosed?"

The last time I went to an Evaluation the man I met with was a total douche who told me I was a hypochondriac had conversion disorder and my anxiety was what was causing everything... He also went off my previous diagnosis and asked me very broad questions about their symptoms to which I replied yes or no... I met with this man for less than 20 minutes and he literally went off my old diagnosis.

He knew nothing about me other than what we talked about and my previous medical records. He made stigmatizing statements when I told him about my body pains and how its possible fibromyalgia, he said he doesnt diagnose women til their thirties.

When I mentioned that I suspect im autistic he basically laughed in my face and told me im not autistic and if I want to see "the autism room" so I can "see" what "autism looks like"

I didn't contact these people back for a long time after that because it took so long to process.... medical gaslighting is real. And gaslighting in itself is insidious as it makes our imposter syndrome so much worse. We question our own existence and realities which attributes to even more mental and physical anguish... psychologically so damaging and these people have no idea.

I think I may have a case with them.. but anyways...

I learned to live in this mind. In this body. In this life to the best of my knowledge and abilities. I have to remind myself its not my fault im chronically overwhelmed or feeling behind. Im coming to terms to the fact that I am disabled. I hate to limit myself, but I have to acknowledge this in order to accept myself and release the internalized abelism.

I have to accept that I never was and never will be like other people and that's okay.

I also need reminder that being diagnosed doesn't make you (autistic). Being (autistic) makes you (autistic).

I put autistic in parentheses because you can literally change it out and tweak it to fit almost any medical condition and it holds true.

Anyways im signing off. I think I've done enough ranting for the night.

Perhaps I'll rant again and plunge deeper. I try to not give to many details but as a neurodivergent person I can't help but go on tangents at times. I'll forget what I thought if I dont write them down, so letting my brain puke words is the best mental exercise I can give myself.

If I do end up seeing a therapist, it makes it alot easier to sort myself.

I have also been trying to orient my mind with art. I try to think of the art I can make .. but when the time comes, im blank. All these ideas for my mind to run into a wall...

Sometimes I wish I had a therapist as a friend.. or a psychiatrist.

It would be good to have someone invested in you the way a friend would ... signing off

[trisduhh]

You’ll Get Better Soon

I don’t Really know how to use Tumblr. But Taylor has inspired me to share my story. So this is an open letter to @taylorswift and I hope that this helps anyone else going through this same situation. 

Dear Taylor,

First and foremost, congrats on your new album! As expected, Lover is astounding in its entirety. I am so proud of you! I know that I don’t really know you, but I feel like I’ve grown up with you and your music. Fair warning this is going to be a long letter. I’ve never written a “fan letter” before, so I apologize for the poor formatting and general awkwardness that will follow in advance.

           I just picked up Lover at Target today, and I can already tell how much happier you are to be creating the music you want and actually owning it for once. How your previous label handled things is gross. I am elated that you have such a strong voice on the album- standing up for what you believe in and speaking out for the marginalized. This means so much to so many. I am so looking forward to seeing how much love and acceptance your music will spread and I hope more people embrace it.

Specifically, I want to talk about track 12 “Soon You’ll Get Better.”I cried my fucking eyes out in the car. I read about how you almost didn’t include this song, because of how personal it is. I’m aware of your mother and her diagnosis with cancer, for that I truly am sorry. I’m sure you hear that often, and it usually never carries much weight, but I really do mean it. Like you, I don’t talk much (or at all) about my own mother’s illness. I usually am very vague when the topic comes up. I want to tell you though. I want to make you feel like you’re not alone in a world of 7 billion people- because that’s how your song made me feel.

Like you said, “I hate to make this all about me.” I don’t want to do that. It’s hard. It’s confusing. It’s much worse for the person going through it, but I still feel scared. I guess I’ll start with a little back story, my life was always hectic from the start. It was just my mother and I. She worked so very hard to support us. We moved quite often, bouncing from house to house chasing happiness. We once drove from Illinois to Arizona in one day with no stops! Needless to say, I am very close to my mother. We even shared a bed until I was 11! Eventually, she met my stepdad and we moved to Texas. I was so happy that she finally found love and acceptance. She could slow down and enjoy life. Unfortunately, that was not the case. She frequently went to the E.R. because of a mysterious stomach pain. The doctors scoffed at her, without even touching her or doing any tests. They wrote it off as “gas.” She was humiliated. So, she suffered for a couple more years with the pain, not wanting to “waste” anyone’s time with “gas.” Then one night after she went to dinner with my step-father she suddenly felt more pain than ever before. She rushed to the E.R. and finally a doctor did a sonogram. She had to have emergency gallbladder surgery because it was about to rupture. We thought this would solve the problem and life would “go back to normal.”  As the doctor pulled her gallbladder out it burst in hundreds of little pieces. He fished the pieces out and hit her pancreas, causing her to now have chronic pancreatitis. Not only that, the gallbladder had been enlarged for so long that it had rested on her liver and killed many liver cells.  Resulting in liver failure. We were unaware of this at the time. She was sent home after surgery and she felt worse than before. She literally turned green. We rushed her back to the E.R. and it turns out she was hemorrhaging. The doctors refused to treat her because they deemed it the original surgeon’s fault- he would have to fix the issue. We called him many times and he ignored us! He was afraid of malpractice, I guess. But we wouldn’t do that, we just wanted her to get better and fast! We had no choice but to go home. She was in so much pain she said to me “just let me die.” I was 14 at the time. Just about to start high school. I had recently moved to this new house in a new town. I didn’t know anyone. I didn’t know how to handle this. The only person I’ve known and loved my whole life is falling apart in front of me and I can’t stop it. I would go to school every day prepared to get the call that my mother had died. She would say to me “I just have to make it until you’re 18.” I had never felt so helpless. She almost died; doctors still have no reason medically why she is still alive today. She bled internally for two years because no one would help. All the while my dad was working two jobs, if he wasn’t working, he was at the hospital with my mom. I was all alone. To make matters worse my parents still owned our previous home. My dad had to make two house payments along with all of the medical bills. I was aware of this, so I tried my hardest not to ask for much. Now, I would pray that both of my parents would get the rest and comfort they deserved. This went on for 5 more years. We relied on the kindness of our neighbors who were nice enough to see if I had dinner for the night or mow the lawn for my dad. They were truly angels.

Much like your situation, I am constantly nervous about my mom’s health. She often forgoes critical medication, doctor visits, and procedures simply because we can’t afford it. To this day, she still doesn’t seek the help she actually needs because we can’t afford to go to the doctor. Because of her complicated case most doctors refuse to even see her… they are afraid they will be sued if something goes wrong. Her doctor currently withholds insulin refills until she comes in monthly for a visit! To me this is disgusting. You can’t just not give a diabetic insulin! It costs her $500+ a visit, how is anyone supposed to afford that?! I plead with my mom to please take care of her health and get the help she needs; it’s been 10 years and she still refuses to apply for disability… I know it’s her pride. I also know it’s because she feels if she states she’s disabled there will be no hope of recovery, that it means no “normalcy” again. I think I’m going to apply secretly for her, I don’t know what else to do. It’s gotten to the point where her legs and feet are so swollen, she can’t wear shoes. I try to do her hair and makeup, so she feels human, but even this makes her upset. She cries and says she doesn’t recognize herself anymore.

I don’t want her to see me cry. I want to be strong for her, but I also don’t have anyone else to talk to. She cries to me and says sometimes she wishes she would die so the pain would end. I don’t know what to do. I’m 25 now, and I work hard so I can help my parents out financially. I feel so guilty wanting to move out on my own. I’m scared to move out. Who will take care of my mother? Will she just let herself go? Will she be even lonelier?

I’m sorry I’m probably boring you with all of this, especially since you don’t even know me. I just wanted you to know I am so glad you released “you’ll get better soon.” I don’t feel so alone. I am praying for your parents to both stay healthy and find the care they need. They have raised a beautiful human being! Thank you for taking time to read all of this. It is so cathartic to write it all out and finally tell someone. Even if you never read this. I want to wish you the best of luck! You’re doing amazing things. You are truly an inspiration. Most of all, I want you to know whole heartedly your music makes a huge impact on millions of people, never stop being you…always stick to what your gut says. Keep fighting the good fight!

#Lover #anopenlettertotaylorswift #taylorswift #heros #LGBTQI #disability #youllgetbettersoon #staystrong #ihopethishelps #Ifinallysaidit #guilt #freedom #love #fuckbigmachinerecords #thankyou #getthistotaylor #girlpwr #girlpower #dixiechicks #loveralbum #swifty #loverera #fuckyeah @taylorswift @taylornation @taylorswiftsdaily

[eds-zebra-warrior]

Ehlers Danlos Society Awareness Month (Day 31 Community)

Not all health conditions have what they call a community or a group of others with the same condition coming together as a group to be with, support and help one another. Let's be honest, most conditions don't need a community. There's a lot of conditions that are very cut and dry and easy to understand. There's a group on Facebook for everything but I can tell you right now there's not going to be a ton of people in a Hemorrhoid support group. The EDS group is a very close knit group with much value and importance to those who are part of it and I'll be explaining some of those reasons.

Of course one of the most obvious with having a rare disease is to be able to meet someone like you. To know others exist and to share similar experiences with. You know you can always find someone there that truly understands what you're going through having a condition so disabling you tend to lose most, if not all of your friends, some even lose family. Rather it be due to lack of understanding, lack of belief, fear, or any other list of reasons it seems to happen to all of us. So this is a way to make friends just like us. Friends that won't resent us for the physical abilities we have lost or the lifestyle changes placed on us by this syndrome.

Another reason is well because it's rare. It's surprisingly difficult to find any good information about EDS on the internet when you first get diagnosed unless you know where to look. In addition to this being a condition that lacks studies and research it's also extremely complex. In fact before being diagnosed, even with going to nursing school, I had no idea something this complex existed. If you are ever trying to find reliable information about a specific aspect of EDS it may be really hard to find, especially if the topic you're looking for is very specific. You can go into groups. A lot of individuals have certain documents bookmarked or saved in a word document or spreadsheet and can lead you in the right direction. If we can't find a study done in something we can also use support groups to do our own informal studies. Just simply create a pole and let everyone chime in. Before you know it, if posted in a larger group you'll go check out your pole and may have two or three hundred answers to your question.

Next, with EDS pretty much any body structure is a free game which means lots and lots of comorbidities. A good number of comorbidities are common amongst us which means we always have someone to relate to and ask questions to. In addition to this you can expand your groups to include groups for people with those comorbidities further extending your knowledge and possibility of friends. Most doctors don't know anything about these conditions so that leaves it to us to learn everything there is to know about it. When you finally think you have read everything there is on the web, others read thousands of sites or journals you haven't come across and ones you have read they didn't know existed so it's all about learning together and having people who understand.

Being a condition that is so very painful and severely affects sleep as well as causing many of us great depression and guilt for what we've lost and the deterioration our body has been through as well as the feeling of loss. We feel guilty for everything we put out families through, for needing help, for canceling plans and letting people down. Not only as if what we once were has already passed away but also the loss of friends, many times every single one we had before this illness and sometimes family members. We grieve the loss and are angry to learn that people we thought were our best friends and would never leave disappointed in us like a used paper plate. This is also the time it dawns on us how many of these people used us when we were healthy to provide them with things we need. Most of us have OCD or are on the high functioning side of the Autism Spectrum so tend to take responsibility and do things right, including not letting down our friends and family very seriously. Most of us thrive on routine and rules and chronic illness often gets to a point that a lot of this is no longer possible forcing us to make decisions last minute, change them or cancel them last minute, not be able to complete things by a time we have set for ourselves etc and that's really hard. It's helpful to know others who are or have been going through the same thing and to know you're not alone, not the one letting yourself and others down and to be told it's okay and it's not our fault.

The majority of us also have Medical Trauma Induced Complex Post Traumatic Stress Disorder. We spent years of our lives rather you're lucky and got diagnosis in two years or ate 70 and have spent the last 55 years actively seeking a diagnosis we all have to fight for one, to see doctor after doctor and oftentimes the worst part of it all, be miss diagnosed with psychiatric disorders such as anxiety and Conversion Disorders. These are extremely dangerous and life threatening diagnosis for us because it essentially closes the door on even looking for a cause of what is going wrong with us. Conversion Disorder is a Diagnosis given after all other conditions have been ruled out the problem is, doctors use it as a crutch to not have to deal with us. We are also superstars, especially in the beginning at having beautiful results when it comes to basic blood tests such as a CBC. The problem is, again, doctors are known to cut corners because they like the majority of mankind are lazy creatures who tend to want to just get the job done. It doesn't matter if it's thoroughly done and done with utmost care to put as much effort into it as they can, it's just done and to them done is good enough so they do the common tests and call it done, close the book and slap a label of conversion disorder on us that follows us around for life for every other doctor to use as an excuse to say they are done too. It takes years to find a doctor who is in it for the better of the patient; one who is up for a challenge; one who is willing to do more testing and testing that is more advanced and most importantly, a doctor who believes us and is willing to go the extra mile. It's when these less common tests like a Tilt Table Study, Gastric Emptying Study, Urodynamics Testing, Upright MRIs instead of doing them in the prone position, Sweat Testing, a Sitzmark Colon Transit Time Study, a 24 hour urine test to measure histamine levels, skin biopsies and ultimately EDS Testing via either the Brighton score system along with a through study of the body and some questions used to determine a positive or negative diagnosis or Genetic Testing to determine a type of EDS that has a genetic mutation that has been discovered. Not all forms of EDS have had their genetic mutation discovered yet which is why the other study is so important. There are more tests that can be utalkzss than the ones mentioned but as you can see, none of these are tests that are done on a routine basis and a lot of doctors don't want to deal with them slapping the psychological, "all in our head" diagnosis on us prematurely.

This results in us without a diagnosis for what we have going on with our body. When this happens we aren't receiving treatment for the symptoms we are experiencing allowing them to escalate. To make things worse we are often given the wrong treatments, handed antipsychotic medications that cause even more adverse symptoms and don't work. When they don't work the doses are increased higher and higher resulting in more to go wrong with our bodies. This also closes the door to treatment causing doctors and hospitals to dismiss life threatening issues, sending us home when we are actually so sick we should be in the ICU. I myself was declared clinically dead at least 10 times before my diagnosis, four because my heart stopped and I went into cardiac arrest and the rest because my blood pressure would drop below 60/20 which in the medical field is a pressure that is considered legally dead. With all but one of these I was sent home within an hour to a few hours of it happening simply told that was weird and sent home on paperwork for Conversion Disorder, Hypochondriasis, or some other psychosomatic disorder and is I was lucky this would sent me discharging me with a diagnosis of low blood pressure and that was that. One of my codes my mom was in the room, thank God for her. When I code no one came. My mom went running down the hall begging for help pleading for a nurse to help because no one was running to my room. The nurse told her I'm probably faking it and just pulled my leads off and told my mom just to ignore me because people like me feed on attention. My mom ran back to the room and thank God had some medical training as a girl scout leader because she had to take first aid and CPR. My mom brought me back. The nurse walked in right after and checked my wires. They are still in place. My state as well as several others protect their medical personnel against malpractice suits so there was nothing we could do. I've been sent home with gastric ischemia which is a life threatening condition where the blood pressure increases to dangerous levels in the intestines. It can cause the pressures to get so high it bursts and dissects blood vessels in the intestines causing a person to bleed to death. I was sent home with a diagnosis of General Psychosis and Anorexia as well as treated for anemia and vitamin deficiency. They blamed it on anorexia, not the fact I physically couldn't eat and was having bowel movements that were nothing but pure blood that everyone. Refused to look at. I had an allergic reaction so bad it almost killed me and was sent home diagnosed with conversion disorder and sent to my doctor who wanted me in ICU but upon refusal from the hospital to see me again even with my vitals so poor my doctor had to take care of me basically sending me home with what I called a take home hospital and working with my mom over the phone to take care of me available all hours of the night. I had a nurse try to give me 50 times the dose of this same medication that caused this. Been sent home with intestinal blockages, hernias, extreme dehydration, a UTI after they said the results came back negative only to get them in the mail a week later to see they were positive and by that time my UTI was so severe I had a kidney infection and was in kidney failure. I've sat there days and nights in a hospital bed where nurses refuse to answer my call light saying I have a conversion. Disorder, don't need to be there and I'm wasting their time and resources taking up a bed for someone who is really sick and that they won't be coming anymore the rest of the night not knowing I was one of the sickest ones on the ward and just misdiagnosed. I've had nurses rip IVs out of my arm, ya know how they push you to your car when you're released? There are a lot of times they pull my IV, tell me I'm not sick anyway and can do it myself having to take multiple trips to get my personal belongings out of my room. When I lost the ability to walk I had multiple doctors tell me I could and would pick me up, put my feet on the ground and the. Let go of

dropping me on the floor. This happened a lot at OSU with their doctors. Again and again dropping me and seeing I didn't have that natural response to catch myself and went straight into the hard tile floor with my fragile and damaged connective tissue would they say hmm. You really can't walk then send another doctor in who would do the exact same thing. I got picked up and dropped four times by four different neurologists just in the first week of being paralyzed and it's happened time and time again after that at other neurology appointments. I could go on and on. This is the stuff a lot of us go through. It's extremely common with EDS, most of us have complex PTSD.

Most of us have an extreme fear of going to the hospital because that's when we are at our worst and at the same time, a time we get treated worse than anywhere else about our chronic illness. We go in knowing it's a game of Russian Roulette with a really high chance we will be sent home sicker than I came in. Worst of all, there's no way to treat our PTSD because it had to be treated by a doctor, the people we have the least trust in. Not only that but the cruel mistreatment never ends. Every hospital visit. I have had good nurses before but I have never gone to the hospital once where I can say everyone was good. I hear a lot of healthy individuals say endless good things about the hospital staff they had or they have some reason they have to go. When you have a rare invisible illness like EDS we aren't given that same care. The appalling lack of medical care never ends therefore it's impossible to even treat our PTSD. It's not like someone in the military who is in a war and when the war is over, it's done, they never have it go back and can get treatment and start to heal. It's like having to live the rest of their lives in that war as a POW who has been captured and imprisoned by the enemy and every time they get out they are found and imprisoned by another enemy and another enemy and then going to see a psychologist who happens for this only to find out the psychologist is one of those enemies from the other side who captures and holds others line you as POWs yet wants to try to help you get over everything that has happened to you even though you're still occasionally been tending by someone else and beat up before getting away again. Seeing a psychologist for us just doesn't work. We have no trust in the medical field and the gross mistreatment and lack of care is never ending. The EDS community can relate to this when one else can. While the healthy people we know, the people we grew up with, who became nurses and doctors themselves get mad telling us those doctors and nurses are heroes, they can do no wrong. That stuff doesn't happen, they are made up of the most caring and compassionate individuals. Those in our community and other rare or invisible disease communities know that degree of mistreatment all too well. We know the truth about the medical field.

We know they are no different than any other company. Identical to the people making minimum wage in a more trivial position such as a greater at a retail store. There are the good ones who take their job very seriously and want to do their job to the best of their ability truly valuing hard work and are highly motivated individuals but most people at a job are just working because they have to. They have bills but if they were multimillionaires there's no way they would be there now. They want to get the job done and go home. It doesn't matter how they get it done, it's just got to be done. These are quantity over quality people. They take working smarter not harder totally wrong, defining it in their mind as taking any short cut necessary to get it done. Ya know how at most jobs they would have, for example, 50 people but there are three of them that seem to pull all the weight. The three everyone thinks takes things too seriously because they hardly leave their desk or station. They don't take the time to walk around socializing and joking around with their peers. When things get behind they are the ones who stress and work really hard to get things caught up where others say I'm not getting paid any more, I'm not going to bend over backwards and stress about if they aren't paying me more. The three people first to volunteer for overtime and the least to grumble of the boss asks them to stay over another 15 minutes to finish something while on the other days a boss May say that if you get your work done you can go hike and everyone rushed to gst the job done to get out the door while those three are left sitting there at their desks to get the job done right whole also correcting others work that was hastily submitted so they could go home or start the weekend early. Just because someone is in the medical field doesn't make them any different from those who hold other jobs. If most of them won five million dollars they would be out of there. Forget the two weeks notice, heck they don't have to work anymore. Someone else can take their patients. If they're told its slow and they can go home when all the patients are out then one more comes walking in the door as they are packing up their stuff there are a lot if doctors will look to the people who are still working and say hey, I'm about to head out of here, do you mind taking this last Patient? It's human nature.

As generations have gone on more and more people are lazy and the medical field is no exception. When you're chronically ill and have spent a lot of time in the hospital it gets really easy to spot those three people. The ones who if they were multimillionaires may cut back their hours but would never dream of leaving their job because their job means more than money to them. They take great pride in making people better, getting them diagnosed, saving lives and they can't see life another way. Those are the good ones. The good ones line any other job. They are far and few, they pull all of the weight, are walked on by other staff members, their managers usually fail to see their accomplishments as they don't spend a lot of time just hanging out with workers at a patient's expense. They are the ones who will advocate and fight for their patients to all ends but like any other job, maybe five percent or one percent or any other single digit percentage of the employees are these people so EDS patients my get one person on their care team that is amazing, maybe two but will never get a whole care team and it seems like the good ones get more far and few the higher the position. I've had more caring and compassionate house cleaning staff. STNA's, more good STNA's than LPN's, more LPN's seen to be there for the patient then RN's and more RN's. Doctors.

I don't think I've ever had a bad Volunteer at a hospital. The volunteers just love to be there for the patients, to put a smile on their faces and to know they made a difference in our lives. Rather it be to bring us a coloring book and crayons, their Emotional Support Dog around to visit us (which is my favorite) bring us a warm blanket or fill up our water containers. I've had one bring me a card and a flower in a small tube of water. The volunteers are there because they want to be there, not because they have to be there. It seems like the higher the person is on the pay scale the more people are in it for the money. Money talks even if it's at the patient's expense and usually if you have a complicated or invisible illness like EDS you are the expenditure. A community is important to know we aren't alone, to share their experiences, some in the group have become medical advocates and will fight for others in their area who can't get the help they need. These advocates, especially the ones with lots of training are invaluable to the EDS community. They may not be able to fix our problems but it's nice to know there is someone out there who tried. When you're at your worst advocating for yourself is extremely difficult and sometimes impossible and oftentimes our families don't do a lot of research on their own so aren't able to advocate for us so having someone who can is more beneficial than words.

As you can see there are so many different reasons community is important and vital to all of us. Some use it simply as a way to relate or a way to make friends like them after losing the friends they had before their health declined to the extent their healthier friends no longer could relate to them and left. Many are involved in the community to gather information and gain knowledge about their conditions. Support groups are also there to talk, especially with so many who have PTSD. We can't trust a psychologist, psychiatrist or therapist as they are medical professionals and talking to a live person is more fulfilling than writing a journal that no one reads. Sometimes it's as if these individuals, having gone through this themselves, know just want to say and how to help us. Some are there as a medical advocate in their area. Someone who can be there for them in medical situations or even just to give them advice as to what to say to make doctors listen, direct them who to contact if they aren't receiving appropriate care and what to do or ask for from our medical personnel. Some even use these groups to find names of doctors that work with EDS patients or places to go where they may be able to get help or even ideas of what treatments work for others with similar comorbidities. There's even a few groups out there run by people who were medical workers before EDS ravaged their body to an extent that they had to leave the field. It consists of disabled nurses, doctors, radiologists and various specialists. This group works to tell us if we need a second opinion. We can post test results or imaging onto the page and since legally they can't have a diagnosis since they aren't currently working they give what's called a "non expert opinion, telling us what they see or would suspect and if we need to see someone else. I find all of these viral and that's why I see the EDS community as not an invaluable and essential part of my life and wellbeing as an individual with Ehlers Danlos Syndrome.

[lostinafairytaleofchaos]

Disabilities & Mental Health Introduction

IT IS NOT ALL IN BLACK AND WHITE – SHEDDING THE LIGHT

Disabilities and mental health awareness are very touchy subjects with me, as is for many of the social media groups I follow. Disabilities and mental illnesses come in many forms. Unfortunately, when writing a blog/ article, the content may become lengthly, therefore, in this blog/ article, I am going to shed light on a few disabilities and mental health issues.

As I continue to post blogs/ articles. l will begin to define and number them. This should help you know where we are on each topic. Are you ready for the overview?

WHAT DEFINES A DISABILITY?

“The ADA defines a person with a disability as a person who has a physical or mental impairment that substantially limits one or more major life activities. This includes people who have a record of such an impairment, even if they do not currently have a disability. It is unlawful to discriminate against such persons. Persons with disabilities are also entitled to reasonable accommodations in the workplace.”

  Various Types of Disabilities

Hearing Disabilities: Hearing impairments may result from problems in any part of the ear or the hearing center of the brain.

Learning/Cognitive Disabilities: Auditory Processing Disorder (ADP), Dyscalculia, Dysgraphia, Dyslexia, Language Processing Disorder, Non-Verbal Learning Disabilities, Visual Perceptual/ Visual Motor Deficit, ADHD, ADD, Dyspraxia, Executive Functioning, and memory.

Motor Disabilities: This is the loss or partial loss of function of a limb, body part, that may result in muscle control and weakness. Motor disabilities include paralysis. The types of motor disabilities are associated with neurological conditions, to include multiple sclerosis, Parkinson’s disease, stroke, cerebral palsy. Additional motor impairment may come from other parts of the body. A stroke can cause an extreme form of motor impairment called “locked-in syndrome”, which the use of the limbs, eyes, and all other cognitive functions that would normally be voluntary, are lost. This is due to the lower brain or brainstem being damaged. Paraplegics (Tetraplegia), is another form of motor disability. In many cases of paraplegia, neutral interfaces are explored in efforts to restore some functionality of the motor skills. This can include implanting a device in the brain motor cortex.

Mental Health Conditions: This is bi-far one of the most controversial, misunderstood, under-diagnosed, less-treated, monitored and mocked of disabilities in my opinion. Mental health conditions and disabilities can range from manageable to unmanageable. They require the correct diagnoses, treatment plans, and ongoing treatments. The list includes anxiety disorder, mood disorders (depression, bipolar, cyclothymic disorder), psychotic disorders (hallucinations, schizophrenia, delusions), eating disorders (binge eating, bulimia, Nervosa, anorexia. Impulse control issues are considered a mental condition, kleptomania, pyromania, alcoholics, drug abusers, compulsive gambling. Personality disorders are a wide range of mental health conditions and disorders. Personality disorders, dissociative identity disorder (I really want to deep dive into this disorder in the next blog), antisocial personality disorder, obsessive-compulsive personality disorder, paranoid personality disorder. These specific personality disorders mentioned cause the person to be extremely inflexible, they cannot deal with change well, they experience different thought patterns, these disorders often interfere with work, school, and relationships. The obsessive-compulsive disorder causes a person to possess repetitive thoughts or fears, they are prone to retain rituals such as counting how many times they do something, triple-checking locking the door, catastrophic thoughts if a task is not completed in a specific way. They may constantly wash their hands, follow the same routines, and be overwhelmed by unreasonable thoughts and fears. PTSD is topping the list of mental health conditions/ disorders currently. It is a condition that is generally developed after a terrifying and/ or traumatic event. It can encompass a wide variety of life-altering events, from war, sexual abuse, physical abuse, an unexpected or sudden death. The long-lasting effects of PTSD include constant memories and thoughts of the events. Emotionally it can cause the person to shut down. Stress response syndrome ordinarily occurs due to sudden occurrences. Examples are the loss of a job, a death, failed relationship or divorce, natural disasters. The stressors begin to resolve typically within 6 months after the event has taken place. Besides, there is a Factitious disorder, sexual/ gender disorders, somatic symptom disorders, Tourette’s syndrome. Diseases such as dementia, Alzheimer’s, sleep problems or any other conditions that involve the brain, fall into the mental health condition/ disorder category. Psychosis, borderline personality disorder, and what I found most interesting on another site, was the fact that ADHD and Autism are classified as mental health conditions/ disorders.

Autism Spectrum Disorder:  This includes Asperger’s syndrome. Autism spectrum disorder can be low functioning to high functioning. There is also atypical autism. The three main functionating areas include, but are not limited to behavioral, communitive, and social interactions. Each level holds different tendencies and quite frankly, these individuals are highly intelligent, though they often cannot understand communication such as listening and talking. They appear to zone off into their own world. Sensitivity issues are involved, difficulty with touch can occur, noises, autistic individuals are known to be very eccentric.

Visual Disabilities: Include partial/ complete blindness.

Physical Disabilities: Includes limited, temporary, or permanent mobility, motility, stamina, dexterity. There are many types of physical disabilities. Stemming from other diseases as mentioned above, or autoimmune illnesses, brain trauma, neurological, birth, accidental, etc.

In Conclusion

As you can clearly see based on the above lists of disabilities, it would be very difficult to judge someone or assume which condition they may suffer from. Unless you are a medical professional and you have personally conducted many tests on specific individuals, please STOP the labeling. Please STOP the stereotyping. I have yet to even give a more in-depth view or definitive breakdown of the mental health conditions/ disorders. Trust me, they will shock you!

The next time you call someone retarded, bi-polar, say that they have multiple personalities, assume they are autistic or have ADHD, make sure you know what you are talking about. EVERY single person deals with EVERY single one of these disorders/ disabilities differently. Some friends or family members may be dealing with them now and you do not even recognize it.

Disabilities are NOT always visible, and disabilities are NOT always a death sentence. Disabilities/ disorders do NOT stop individuals from having feelings or wanting to live a normal life. Very few people bring these disabilities upon themselves.

Help break the stereotypes and help stop the labeling of mental health disorders/ disabilities and ALL disabilities. Be kind, you do not know to the extent someone has gone through to get where they are at this moment nor do you know how your words will affect them.

Suicide rates are very high amongst individuals with disabilities, especially chronic pain patients and patients in the mental health realm.

Show compassion and be on the lookout for more information on each of these disorders/ disabilities as I jump into a series of research and share information, to better assist you in understanding each condition.

  If you know someone that is suffering from a disability or disorder and can no longer work or needs assistance taking care of themselves, there may be resources available for them, such as short term/ long term disability (if they are still employed).

Additional information can be obtained by following the link below and the application is also online to apply for SSI/ SSDI via https://www.ssa.gov/disability/.

  As always, thank you for reading, please share, subscribe, and feedback is always encouraged.

 Let us hear your story (we all have one)!

  References used for research purposes:

(https://adata.org/faq/what-definition-disability-under-ada)

(https://namica.org/resources/mental-illness/types-mental-illness/)

(https://www.webmd.com/mental-health/mental-health-types-illness#2)

(https://services.anu.edu.au/human-resources/respect-inclusion/different-types-of-disabilities)

(https://ldaamerica.org/types-of-learning-disabilities/)

(https://www.neuromodulation.com/motor-impairment)

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