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#I am in fact physically in capable of talking about one without talking about the other
myriadeyed · 1 month
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“It’s obviously valid to be bugkin but you also can’t just expect people to get over it when they have a genuine fear!”
I’m afraid of dogs.
Dogs put me extremely on edge. I avoid them while outside and if one’s in a room with me I’ll try to leave or else start to panic. Especially medium-sized and larger breeds. Mere images of dogs may not give me a panic attack, I will admit that, it's not a phobia. But if you want to talk hypocrisy, if you're opening up that discussion:
Hey dog therians, dog otherhearted folks and clinical cynanthropes, what if everywhere you went, the unspoken attitude of the alterhuman community was—
Don’t post dog photos or talk about being a dog in the main alterhuman tags. Don’t talk about your shifts, your instincts, or your kind in the main tags. If you’re a CZ, don’t talk so openly about your biological reality. It’s extremely triggering for people with cynophobia. The idea of physically being or becoming a dog grosses them out to briefly think about, so try not to discuss your literal existence. If you must, at least trigger tag yourself with #tw dogs or #tw dog mention so people can stay safe by censoring things that will hurt their mental health. It’s okay if you’re dogkin but in my DNI I'm going to write something like, don’t follow me if your blog hosts too many graphic close-up images of dogs doing dog things, even if you censor them. Don’t add dog photos to open posts in the alterhuman tags, you have no idea who might be sent into a panic attack by images of yourself so you should play it safe and only put them on your own posts. And stop being so offended by people who comment on posts about pet dogs or dog facts saying they want to bleach their eyes or kill it with fire, they can’t help having a phobia.
Not great, is it? Fortunately, and I do genuinely mean that, this is a sentiment you will only see once, on this post, completely satirically. Except it’s just a real sentiment for bug therians/hearted and other invertebrate alterhumans. Of course what I said was satire. But if it pissed you off when you thought it might not be, please, contemplate on that reaction, really spend some time on it.
Also, if you're wondering what I mean by "other invertebrate alterhumans", (and I'm sorry for how heated I got when I was writing this part last night even after editing it down)
You know I’m a bug zoanthrope too, not just a bird? And see above if you're wondering why I never said shit about it, just said I was a centipede therian and even then said I was just questioning and didn't really talk much about it. Am I allowed to talk about it without tagging it #tw body horror, even though I obviously don’t fucking find my own body to be horror? Can I talk about it without tagging it #tw bugs like just the very thing that I am needs to be censored for people's well-being? I'm sorry if I come across judgmental. Offline I constantly interact with people saying they’re a nature lover but centipedes are the only thing on Earth that they still hate. And I have to come online knowing that any of those people could be bloggers in the alterhuman tags and it’s my responsibility to tiptoe around them. “Because centipedes are scary and disgusting.” Because I’m scary and disgusting. My brain is not capable of hearing a difference and I can’t change that. It is so much my reality that it's the same emotional mix of anger and anxiety and hurt that would be (has been, lol) triggered by someone ranting about how much they hate Jews or trans people to me.
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dearladynightmare · 1 year
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Good day my friends! Today I want to share with you my very well-considered theory about Hordaks “defect”. This idea really makes sense to me which is why I use it canonically for my comics (especially the next one). So, if you are interested in how I spent my nights, not able to sleep because of this head-canon, GO AHEAD! ;)
While watching the show I noticed some inconsistencies according to what Hordak said about his defect and how Horde Prime (HP) dealt with it. But what exactly do we know about his defect? Well, he told Entrapta that he was a clone of Horde Prime, that he had been his “top general” but he a had a defect in his cloning. So Prime declared him worthless and sent him to die to the front lines.
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When I rewatched that episode I was confused. Horde Prime had a top general? Horde Prime himself chose a “worthless” clone to be his top general??? A clone who’s not even worth to have a name?? Later we found out that Prime does not distinguish between his clones. None of them was special in any way. Their only reason for existence was to serve HP. The clones also don't have fixed positions or tasks. You can follow this thesis well following Hordak. One time he stands at Prime's side, one time he is a guard in the corridors, one time he is a sentry on Etheria, ... It doesn’t matter to Prime - They doesn’t matter.
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My first explanation was that Hordak just made the “top general” story up. A story he was telling himself to feel less worthless. An attempt to ascribe value to himself and in the eyes of Prime. And to give meaning to what he was doing on Etheria. It seemed simple – to simple. So, I thought what was if Hordak told the truth? And now hold on my friends!
Hordak wasn’t like the other clones. He had something which made him special – his defect. And I am not talking about his physical health problems which we were able to see in the show (I`ll come back to this later). I am talking about Hordaks ability of independent thinking and slight resilience against HPs mind control. Sounds weird but pls hear me out!
After Hordak returned to HP, his story could have ended. Prime wiped his mind and Hordak should have been like all the other clones. He should have been unable to remember who he was and his complete past on Etheria. But his story wasn’t over. From that time Hordak showed us that Primes mind control does not really work on him. And I have proof!
1. Prime is barely able to see Hordaks thoughts
Primes wasn’t able to see his thoughts right after their reunion. He seemed to wonder and came closer to touch Hordaks face. Then it worked. Later Hordak started to question everything, he was thinking about Entrapta, the first ones writing, She-Ra, the rebellion and was able to keep all those thoughts from the all knowing- all seeing Horde Prime, even if he was standing right next to him. Even if Hordak shouldn’t been able to remember any of those things in the first place.
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2. Hordak remembers things without even trying
Before Hordak noticed that he had forgotten something he already remembered things without trying. For example when he met Catra on the corridor and called her by her actual name and not little sister like all the others.
3. Only Hordak was able to fight the mindcontrol
In the show we see various characters being controlled by Prime. But no one was able to resist as much as Hordak did (and he sometimes didn’t even try). Catra was the first to fall victim to the control. she could only defend herself when the chip in her neck got damaged, and even after that she was barely able to. Later, many other protagonists became victims, without the capability to defend themselves. In the end, even Micah was under the control and would have killed his own daughter if Glimmer wasn’t stronger than him. The mind control was stronger than his fatherly love and the fact that he was a mighty sorcerer!
Fact is, even if the controlled characters stood in front of the person they loved the most, they weren’t able to fight the control BUT Hordak (who only exists to obey Primes orders) found the lil first ones writing and went all like “ENTRAPTA! MY TINY WIFE!” ... Well kind ofxD
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He also refused Primes orders when he met Entrapta back on Etheria again. He recognized her and wouldn't hurt her. He let her run off! And don't forget when Prime wanted him to get disposed of her. Prime ordered him personally to get rid of her, and he refused! BETTER he turned against him.
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And tbh I don’t think theres a difference between a clone under mind control or an controlled Etherian. After all, the clones also had their own personalities, as we were able to see from Wrong Hordak.
And if all that is true, it is possible that Hordak really was a top general of Prime. Maybe HP recognized that Hordak is “smarter” than the others. Maybe he has used Hordaks feature at the beginning and gave him the post as top general. Maybe in form of a consultant? But we know Prime and we know that he wanted to control everything. And maybe he started to question whether he really wanted to grant Hordak this worth. He created a very own “security gap” and so he got rid of Hordak. Of course he didn't tell Hordak about the real reason why he wanted to get rid of him. He just told him that he was a defect! Hordak wasn't aware of what his actual defect was (that he was special) until he started to experience his body betraying him.
Which leads us to his obvious health problems! But what are they if they are not the original defect? Hordaks body turned out to be very weak. He made himself an amour to hold himself together (btw I think that’s very impressive since he’s „just“ a clone, it shows how smart he was!) because his body was betraying him. Well I noticed sth Wrong Hordak said and showed us. THE NUTRIENT-RICH AMNIOTIC FLUID. Remember? When he cooked together with Glimmer he said “True nourishment comes from the favor of Horde Prime, also from nutrient-rich amniotic fluid.“ After that, he showed off an ampoule of this green liquid stuff that we've seen often in the show. Soooo since I´m sure that HP has better things to do than share his rare food with his clones I think they also ate things like ration bars BUT this green liquid seems to be most important to Horde Primes species… He himself is treated with it and even a “simple and worthless clone” like Wrong Hordak is equipped with it. It´s a property he carries with him, so it must be important. Maybe important for their state of health??
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If that’s true… and I think it is… Hordak has had a massive lack of an indispensable substance his species requires! And that over years since he has been parted from Prime! No wonder he was doing that horrible! This would explain why his state of health got worse over time and why he no longer had green eyes. His own technologies helped him for a long time but soon failed. If Entrapta had not been there, to make him a new suit he probably would have died or sth.
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But even Entrapta's technologies could not entirely help him. At least not enough. Not until he returned to Prime, because Prime had no trouble healing Hordak. It was Prime's technologies that Hordak needed, so why did he throw Hordak out when his defect was only a thing that HP could easily cure? So the physical defect was just a concomitant symptom of years of neglect.
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In the end there’s one question left: Why did Prime accept Hordak into his ranks again if my theory is right? Why would he take Hordak back if he was able to resist the mind control. Easy. Horde Prime is an arrogant and selfish dumbass. He was sure that after all that happened he must be the one Hordak loved the most. He decided to watch and test Hordak and his faith (when he asked him to kill Entrapta). He wanted to see him suffer. And he knew if Hordak wasn’t faithful he could easily get rid of him. But he decided to play that sick game… and he lost because Hordak chose to break the chain of abuse.
So that’s it. My theory about Hordak! Thank you so much for reading! I really hope you enjoy!💜
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electricbathsalt · 2 months
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(from kainagant) psst what are your extensive headcanons/thoughts on hero!overhaul au? i'd love to hear what you think he'd be like as a hero.
I AM SO GLAD YOU ASKED!! Idk why I didn’t talk about this sooner—it’s like I have to be prompted on a topic before I remember “oh yeah, I actually have thoughts on this matter, that I can speak out loud!!” 💀 also, I apologize in advance for how long this is. I’m basically summarizing the entirety of this AU in my mind, and it’s like. The longest-standing AU for Chisaki I have.
Anyway, first things first—he got taken away from the Hassaikai when he was young (like, maybe eleven or twelve?) and gets plopped in a Youth Recovery & Rehabilitation Center, which he was extremely pissed about at first, but his eyes kinda opened over the years as he learned more and more about how families and such are actually supposed to function, and how abnormal his entire life actually was up to that point.
Basically; he gets a stable, safe environment and therapy!! Yay!
By the time he reaches fifteen-sixteen, him going into hero school kinda just. Happened. He initially just wanted to shadow Recovery Girl, but they ended up making him take the entrance exam, and well… he passed with flying colors and all of a sudden he was a 1-A student. Luckily, that means instead of simply shadowing Recovery Girl, he gets to work as her official assistant! Cool, right.
And oh boy, does he learn a lot under her tutelage. Namely bedside manner. I imagine Chisaki who got away from the yakuza and had therapy wouldn’t be as blatant an asshole (obviously), but he would still be a bit lost on social norms and also honest/blunt to a fault. He doesn’t understand “putting things gently”, or “softening the blow”, and so Recovery Girl works to teach him when, where, and how he can be “nicer” to people/which situations require delicacy. She grows unexpectedly fond of him and actually finds his unwavering honesty refreshing because she knows he isn’t malicious and is simply stating exactly what he thinks. You just have to get used to his straightforwardness and he becomes rather endearing.
Recovery Girl also discovers that he’s actually capable of extreme kindness. Turns out when you coax him into telling you what’s on his mind, sometimes he’ll really surprise you with how much he cares, even if he himself doesn’t realize it, either (Without Pops and with therapy, Chisaki slowly grew back into caring about others. It took a lot of work, but without anyone weaponizing kindness against him, he felt he could allow himself to slowly feel it again (this is because doesn’t canon slightly imply Chisaki used to be kind like Eri with how he’s sort of like her if she never got saved? What if the way he escaped AFO’s facility was because he finally threw away caring about others and that was the difference between her and him? The fact Eri never got pushed to that point because she was rescued?))
Now, about his hero training. With his quirk-training, there’s not a lot to say/do. I’d say his quirk-training would involve a lot of “make this into this, as quickly as possible”. Basically, training him to be as precise and fast with his quirk usage as they can get him. I’d like to imagine that with training, they push him into being able to manipulate matter in all sorts of different ways, on the fly. He’s trained a lot in using environment to his advantage and whatnot. And maybe also one day, he ends up gaining the ability to use his quirk in areas other than his hands. Dunno.
For physical-training, I think they would heavily concentrate on making him extremely agile. Because hear me out—imagine Toga’s quirk awakening fight scene where she turns into Uraraka and sprints through all those people and takes them out. Imagine if Chisaki was able to move like that. He’d be fucking terrifying. They’d probably also want him to be extremely agile just on the front of being able to hit his hands against surfaces from as many positions as possible.
He absolutely would carry around things like painkillers and anesthesia like you said. Also hear me out, he’d carry around small bags of scraps that he’d then Overhaul to seal people’s wounds, since if the wound is big enough, he’d need some sort of substitute material to close it without sacrificing other parts of the person’s body.
He’d also sometimes work with the support course. He knows a lot about the human body and how quirks function, not to mention his quirk itself would be very useful in creating support items.
He’d get dragged into a lot of search-and-rescue missions because he’s literally perfect for those.
Pops eventually manages to get back into contact with Chisaki—to ask him to take a look at the girl he’s recently in possession of since her quirk is a dangerous mutation, and he’s such a fancy-pants doctor/support hero and quirk expert nowadays. Chisaki goes (he’s panicking internally from the moment he hears Pops’ voice over the phone to the moment he’s standing in front of the girl herself). He asks to take Eri for a couple days to run some tests. He never brings her back. He obtained full-custody of her via spilling every damn thing he’d ever learned and been through under the Shie Hassaikai.
(Seeing her sitting so lifelessly at that table, waiting to be prodded at like some sort of science experiment, reminded him of himself so much that it had been physically painful. The decision to ask to take her for only a while and then go back on his word was a rash one. It’s also one he doesn’t regret even slightly)
Huge advocate for quirkless people, and brings lots of awareness to quirk experimentation, since he’d been a victim of it himself.
And yes, becomes one of UA’s now multiple official on-site medical professionals. (They switch out as necessary)
So basically, he’s an extremely busy guy who never gets a moment’s rest thanks to the many… energetic people in his life (all the UA students give him migraines galore. Don’t even get him started on his coworkers), he’s slightly (very) terrifying, and SURPRISE! It’s good parent!chisaki AU as well, because I’m not leaving Eri to rot in Pops’ care.
I also play around with the idea of him never getting separated from his bio parents and becoming a hero from there, which mostly impacts his personality versus the actual stream of events that happen.
If there’s any further questions or if you wanted to know about anything specific, ask me and I’ll be happy to answer!! (Goes for anyone who may or may not be reading this)
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wen-kexing-apologist · 10 months
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Thoughts on Last Twilight Ep. 5
Okay so a tell tale sign of a really good show for me is when I am rendered incapable of talking about it, which is why you’ve never seen a single analysis of I Told Sunset About You or I Promised You the Moon out of me, because if I think about that show too hard the bees return to my brain. And I’m having that problem with Last Twilight too where my chest feels absolutely bursting with feelings but I do not know that I am capable of writing anything about this show that is structured or coherent without prompting. So, here’s some incoherent ramblings I guess. 
First off, Aof is fucking brilliant and I am really desperately in love with the way that Mhok and Day just so beautifully complement each other/round each other out. I love that they have two completely disparate backgrounds and yet they can relate to one another so well. 
Mhok was literally imprisoned, and with the ankle monitor and very likely under some form of house arrest or curfew. Mhok walked through the world after his release from prison completely branded as a criminal, and unable to maintain his career because people always took him at face value. Day lost his career because of his blindness, and then willfully imprisoned himself in his own room because of how heavily he was grieving. 
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Mhok knows what it is like to be looked at and judged, and I really loved earlier on in the show how confused he was at why Day would be bothered by that, presumably because he got used to being stared at himself. And I love that Mhok learned his lesson about that by trying to understand Day in a way no one has really taken the time to do for Mhok himself. I love that Mhok is able to take his own experiences of being stared at as a comparison for what it is like to not know if you are being looked at and judged. 
Rung lost her life, and that has fundamentally impacted Mhok and Mhok’s relationship to his sister. Similarly, Day lost (or at least thought he lost) the life he had which has fundamentally impacted himself and his relationship to Night. I don’t know that I have enough information yet to definitively declare how Rung’s death has impacted Mhok’s behavior and approach to life, but I do like to think that Mhok’s experience around Rung’s death, the fact he wasn’t there for her, the fact that he had to go through his first year of life without her imprisoned, may have been a contributing factor to how and why Mhok is so determined to get Day to live his life again. 
I don’t know, I was just thinking about Mhok’s suggestion that Day does his normal thing and goes to Gee’s game immediately following a conversation about Rung’s death and how he thought he would be able to make her False Rice again some day, just felt so clarifying to me as to how and why Mhok approaches Day the way he does. Because Day and Mhok both understand the meaning of “I thought I had more time” so well, for such fundamentally different reasons. 
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gif by @casualavocados
I love that Mhok is starting to open up more to Day. Which, when you think about it, Mhok has been pretty private about his life despite knowing so much about Day’s life right out of the gate. I personally read this as a strong indicator for Mhok’s feelings for Day and how he is making a concerted effort to move from caretaker to lover. And there are so many fun layers to that relationship because their current relationship is not balanced. There is a bidirectional imbalance in the caretaker and client relationship. Mhok has power over Day’s daily life and if he wanted to he could have radically more control over Day’s autonomy. As Day’s caregiver, Mhok inherently has access to much more personal information about Day than Day would have for Mhok. Yet Day is still his employer, still his boss, working for Day is still what pays Mhok’s bills. So in order to sort of bridge that divide, Mhok needs to start working to shift their balance. Mhok already balances the physical caretaking elements of his relationship to Day rather well, and has let Day determine what he can do on his own and what he needs help with, so he isn’t stripping Day of his autonomy. 
If Mhok really wants a chance with Day, then the needs to reciprocate the personal information, and I love how smoothly everyone handled the scene. I think Sea did a phenomenal job with how he had Day react to Mhok’s story, as if some things started clicking in to place for him. Day and Mhok have never talked about Mhok’s background, at most Day has brushed aside the information about Mhok having assault charges. I don’t know yet that Day understands just how much Mhok is capable of relating to Day’s feelings and experiences, because he’s been so busy in the past few episodes focusing on how much Mhok is incapable of relating to Day’s feelings and experiences. 
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I am not the first, nor will I be the last person to say that I loved the allusions to Day and Mhok’s relationships to their siblings. Once again there is some commonality between them there, in that their relationships are complex. We currently have a very limited view of Rung. As far as we know she was ambitious and hopeful, and then she hit a really bad low after her nail salon failed and ultimately completed suicide. We haven’t seen any indication from flashbacks or the like of Rung’s flaws, we haven’t actually seen her fail Mhok, or be heartless to Mhok. Yet Mhok agrees with Day’s initial comment that the hydrangeas means heartless. Because Mhok is still mad at Rung for leaving him, he is still stuck in his grief. We haven’t seen him put in any time or effort to process his own pain, instead Mhok is doing what grieving people do, and helping someone else instead. 
I am sure Rung was not a perfect person, I am hoping we get more flashbacks of her and get to see more of her flaws, more of the relationship she and Mhok actually had. I am hoping we get a change for Day to help Mhok navigate his own pain, just like Mhok has been helping Day. But it was certainly interesting to see the parallels between Day saying that Mhok has fallen for Night’s act, thinking him nice while Mhok has associated his sister with heartlessness. 
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gif by @casualavocados
And I don’t know that I have the energy to get in to it right now in any further detail (hey look at me, trying to keep things short), but I do just want to acknowledge the fact that Mhok has really committed to giving Day as much of a sensory experience as he can. When Mhok took Day out on the practice date, he wore perfume so Day could smell him (and as an aside I love that Mhok puts effort in to making himself look good even though Day can’t see him). When Mhok took Day out on the walk to cheer him up, he brought him to a bridge on a public road, where there are sounds, and there is a fence that Day can feel; he brought him to a flower shop where Day can smell and feel the flowers and where there are bright colors that might register within Day’s limited vision. 
Mhok was constantly touching Day in so many different ways. Casual/platonic touch when he’s performing his duties as caregiver; quickly and playfully when he’s trying to get Day to chase him; heavily and intentionally when he’s both comforting Day and when he’s turning up the charm. One of my favorites is honestly the moment that Day lets his fingers curl around Mhok’s hand when Day switches to using August as a guide. 
Anyway, I love this show so much, it is quickly climbing the ranks to become one of my favorites of 2023.
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gabessquishytum · 8 months
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For all the trans headcanons and au's I've seen, I don't think I've ever seen anyone talking about trans!Hob getting bottom surgery, so here I am to fix this
Hob was rather lucky in that it wasn't too difficult for him to pass, he was rather tall for when he was born (in the modern age he'd be considered average leaning short though). He was strong and made sure that no one ever questioned his gender, if they did, Hob would make sure that they'd regret it.
Hob was one of the first trans men to start T, obviously since he was immortal he was just like "what's the worst that can happen" maybe there was some trial and error involved in getting to a decent level of T, but eventually he manages to get his body to a point where he's happier with it than he had ever been.
Now he has wanted bottom surgery for a while, but he also did not want to go through with having to stay at a hospital. Just the odds of his immortality being discovered was just too high for him to take the risk. He had already been drowned once, and he's certain that the result of his secret being found out would only be worse in the modern age.
But then Morpheus escapes. He comes back and admits he's Hob's friend. He introduces himself to Hob as Morpheus and agrees to meet with Hob on a more regular basis. The more they meet up, the more Hob is falling for Morpheus. Eventually Hob decides to come out to Morpheus as trans, to which Morpheus blinks at him and is like "I know?"
Hob: You knew? Since when? How?
Morpheus: I thought it was well established that I know most things about most people
Hob: Okay... fair. So you see me as a man?
Morpheus: You have always been a man in your dreams
Hob, almost crying now because most of his life he's had to hide this fact about himself for his own safety and even when he doesn't have to hide, it always felt like that most people would question his identity: So you've always known? And you've never once questioned that I'm a man?
Morpheus: What was there to question? Dreams are just as real as the waking world, often they are more truthful than the waking world. You are a man in your dreams, why should I, who am all dreams. question that
Hob stares at Morpheus in a stunned silence for a few moments before he gives into the temptation to give him the biggest hug he's capable of.
Morpheus was not expecting that reaction, but it wasn't unwelcome, so he returns the hug as best he can, it's a bit awkward because Morpheus isn't used to physical contact, but he's doing his best to comfort his friend.
Morpheus: Did... did I say something wrong?
Hob with tears in his eyes: I love you
Maybe Morpheus freaks out after that, but somehow they get their shit together and start dating.
At some point Hob mentions that he really wants bottom surgery, but that he really doesn't want his immortality to be discovered and hospitals always make him really nervous. So Morpheus, probably after a dream in which Hob experiences all the joys of having a dick and gets to top without using a strap, promises that if Hob wants to go through with bottom surgery, that he'll be there every step of the way and make sure that his immortality is not discovered.
So immediately upon waking, Hob schedules an appointment with a doctor.
As promised, Morpheus is there with him through every tedious doctors appointment and through his boring and painful stay at the hospital after his operation is over. Luckily for Hob, since he's immortal, he heals much quicker than would be average, but he still needs help with lots of things in the weeks after his surgery. So Morpheus is there to make sure he eats and to help him with everything (Dream's siblings are watching in shock as Morpheus is happily waiting on Hob hand and foot and helping him in every way he can in his own quiet way, they've never seen him like this)(Desire has bets on how long this relationship will last, Death has cast her bet that this relationship will last much longer than any of his previous ones.)
Eventually they get to have sex in the waking world again. Morpheus gets to help Hob figure out what he likes again now that he has a dick. Hob is immensely pleased with the fact that he can now top without having to use a strap. Morpheus just loves watching Hob rediscover what he likes now that his body more accurately reflects himself.
Anyway, I just want to see more trans people who want bottom surgery in fics, I almost never see that and it's really a shame
is 🪐taken?
This is such a lovely little ficlet, thank you 🪐!! I always love it when Hob comes out the Dream in fics, and Dream always responds with such kindness. I firmly believe that Dream would always see Hob as a man from the very beginning, and would just innately be able to view him as he dreams/imagines/fantasises himself to be. In a way its more natural for Dream to look at Hob like that, than it is to see his physical "real" form.
I also love Hob’s phobia of hospitals here. It's natural for him to fear them as an immortal, but I think there's also subtext here about being queer (trans in particular) and dealing with medical situations. There's a really sweet allegory within Hob being initially too fearful to go and have the procedure but then being able to do it with Dream’s support. It's not just that Dream can keep the secret of his immortality safe, he will also protect and advocate for Hob while he's vulnerable. I'm very soft about that.
And of course Hob getting to have a dick is wonderful and delicious and it's so perfect that Dream is the one who gets to teach him how to use it. It's Hob’s favourite step in their journey together so far, and although he plans to be with Dream for thousands of years, he's sure that he'll always remember the moment in which he got to sheath himself in his lover for the first time. He can't wait to practise every day until he knows exactly what they both like best, and exactly how to make Dream come apart on his cock.
It's just the best thing in the world to wake up from a dream and know that his dick is still there - and he'll never stop thanking Dream, for making it all real.
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docholligay · 1 month
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A relevant question was asked by @tallangrycockatiel about my love of Interview With the Vampire: "Um, why are you into something that is all about dudes, all the time? Is this us not being a bitch's bitch?" Only, she is English so she said it in a more polite, suggested sort of way.
A very fair question! It is extremely true that, by and large, a thing with men only is less interesting to me by far and it takes a lot more for me to get into it. But she was not put off by this, for she had developed a theory:
My two initial theories are that either it hit you early enough that that hadn't become such a strong preference, or that it has something to do with the fact that despite being 95% men the entire cast seems to be having what I can only describe as dyke drama the entire time.
She both knows me and is smart, so there we are. The answer is basically: YES.
I started reading the Vampire Chronicles when I was something around 13, and so I didn't really have an idea that it was kind of fucked up that men we treated as the only default interesting people on earth. I pretty much took it as an implicit truth, where I never would have SAID that, but, I was very much in what can only be described as a 'masculinity k-hole' where of course I wanted to be a 'tomboy' and the only way for a girl to be tough and cool was if she was 'just like a boy' and this whole idea that men and masculinity were superior vomit vomit vomit whatever I am perfectly capable of beating someone's ass in red lipstick but that line of thinking did not occur to me at the time.
So I had NO sensitivity to the idea that stories whose ENTIRE UNIVERSES centered around men might be even, annoying. Anne Rice straight up does not care about or like women, and it is absolutely reflected in the way she writes her female characters. I cannot IMAGINE someone reading these as a fully grown adult who thinks women are neat, actually, and not coming away going, "My god, what is happening in these books?" But when you grow up with something, it changes with you, and the ways you think of it aren't COMING from adult you, they are, at least in part, coming from YOUNG you. And, in much the same way A Song of Ice and Fire, which I read at a similar time, gave me what I wanted from fantasy and wasn't getting, this did as well. I did not know that it would have been what is now called urban fantasy, and I didn't know that was a thing I liked (I very much know that now) all I knew was, I liked it. It was batshit and felt dangerous and it was unhinged and very gothic, though, again, not a way I could have expressed it.
So I'm carrying all that --I'll say baggage even though that has a negative connotation--when I come to the work. I already pre-like it.
This can of course backfire, but it didn't, so, I'm not gonna get into that.
NUMBER TWO: The 'all dudes' thing is not insurmountable. It's a quality issue. I love Dan Simmons' work and his women are basically nonexistent. There are plenty of things I like that don't center women. But, the bar to entry is MUCH higher. I would never in my life willingly watch something like "sailor moon but boys though."
What Interview has, that I love, is a very rare thing: Well written, EXPLICITLY gay, and everyone is fucking terrible. It is an adult show for grown-ass adults where people fuck and murder and abuse each other. Armand is the physical manifestation of gaslight gatekeep girlboss. Louis rewrites an entire personal history to make himself look better and emotionally manipulates everyone he comes into contact with. Lestat is a hot tempered, vain dilettante who does shit without thinking and then has the audacity to go, "Oh no, the quencies!" Everyone sucks, everyone is abusive in one way or another, all the fucking exes overlap, and I LOVE IT. Anyone looking for a hero or victim is watching the wrong fucking show and I am SO HAPPY ABOUT IT.
I'll close with my response when we were talking about how fucking great Sarah Waters is, in relation to the above:
it took me forever to realize that I didn't actually want recommendations for lesbian fic, what I was actually asking is: So who is doing it like Sarah Waters? Which unfortunately is no one. The woman is my own personal oasis in the desert.
And God, it has taken me YEARS to convince people that I care so much less about whether or not something is gay than if it is GOOD. Does it say something TRUE, you know? Is it messy? Is it sometimes uncomfortable? I would fucking LOVE if it could be gay on top of these things, but I'll real here:
l'll read a good straight thing versus a bad and especially a fluffy gay thing
I LOVE that shit like REd, White and Royal Blue or coffee shop Aus or whatever exist for people who want them, but I am out for blood ahaha
I have a happy, boring, domestic gay life, i do not need to imagine what a life where your biggest argument is about the quantity and variety of fucking breakfast cereal (We have EIGHT. BOXES.)
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fanonimus · 6 months
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My brother is obsessed with TTG, and I am baffled. We binged it, and I looked around in the... Fandom? I know the show is lighthearted, but I'm a psychology nerd.
Tw: Abuse, neglect, shitty people in general, mind conzrol and trauma. Progress with caution.
Not many people talk about the abuse Robin faces. I don't understand why is there basicaly no angsty content.
I also want to scoop that boy up and hug him and take him away from those people that surround him.
This boy has no positive influence in his life. Get him a therapyst.
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He's neglected. I was sick watching this.
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WHAT THE HELL DUDE this was genuinely hard to watch, and even the colour coded idiots aknowledge how badly he was treated.
Oh but they don't get away scott free. The little idiots.
They constantly hurt him (which I noticed is a reocurring joke, but it happens to him so constantly that it's not even humour. It's just... painful.)
What the fuck was that prank?
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Considering I know his backstory pretty well (look, I watch enough dc), this prank just makes me want to cry. He smiles. His smile broke my heart. I genuinely started crying, alonside Robin. It was not a nice experience.
So they clearly don't have a problem with triggering traumatic responses.
Robin is also almost always the butt of the joke, even tough he is the leader nobody respects him.
Which would be understandable if he didn't try his damn hardest. He's resourceful and can make the best of a situation.
Like the time he got dance powers (which is just amazing, holy shit I want dance powers).
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He found great use of an othervise "useless" pover.
Speaking of useless, his "friends" look down on him because he has no powers. Even though he is capable of beating all of them without it.
Yknow, like in the movie.
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Oh yeah, nice recall to the movie the one where they competed with the Super Hero Girls team (love that show).
Y'know, where it started like this
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And ended like this in like, five seconds.
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Abandonment issues go brrr:
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He's my angsty boy.
Also, the fact that he answered mind control on the last question, and it wasn't even on the board, broke something in me.
Him being a "control freak" is also played up for jokes, which I personally hate, but you can also go with the route of the Titans just not listening, ever, and Robin, still raised by the batman even if differently than in canon, in a city where if you are not on top you are dead, it's obvious that he developed an instictive need for control. He had gotten used to being on top of every situation, so when he felt that control slip, he grasped it and held on. This behaviour is not good, but he can't help it, and without proper consuling, he won't be able to stop this behaviour. He could, if he just let go of the illusion of control he clings to, a safety net, and we all know one can not simply just do that.
(I was someone people called a "control freak". I worked on myself, and I changed, but it took years after I noticed. Letting go is the hardest thing people like me and him can do because letting go means losing control, and that can be the scariest thing in the world. So I have experience, yes.)
(Yes, I also have experience. No, I am not going to talk about it, but it wasn't physical, don't worry)
For the hitting... Wild hot take and shit: Since Batsy was not a stellar dad, he kept robin in line by means not so family-friendly. (He hit his kids in canon, it's really OOC for him, but we have proof that happened) And it was really effective. Children of abusive parents go a lot of ways, but repeating the parents' mistakes is one of them. So maybe Robin decided that violence might be the thing to keep his teammates in line. (We are circleing back yeah.) But it clearly didn't work.
Edit: Holy shit I just realized that this Robin is all of the worst qualities of the other Robins. Obsessive, Controlling, full of himself, violent, and then throw their insecurities into there too (Abandonment issues, parental issues, anxiety, paranoia). Holy lady.
Edit2: Thank you, Yurki-posts, for pointing out some things my little rant was missing. I shall update it now.
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crazyintheeast · 2 years
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Why I believe that the Halo is powered by love
From the start we have seen that the Halo responds to strong emotions. Beatrice said it herself”The Halo is responding to your emotions” but the Halo’s greatest feats have always been connected to one thing. Love. We first saw it when Ava saved Beatrice. Ava didn’t just do her usual blast, she blew up the whole all while specifically targeting the shotgun pellets and letting them fall to the ground. I don’t know much about physics but I am pretty sure that any kinetic forces that can deflect bullets would turn every squishy humans into a Picasso painting so Ava unconsciously launched two pulses. One general around room and one hyper powerful micro burst aimed solely at the shotgun pellets.
And we saw how much this drained the Halo. Ava was actually paralyzed for a few minutes. Next we have a the iconic wall scene. They talked about Ava breaking through her pain but lets face it what made Ava capable was Beatrice love and assurance that she would always be there for her
This became even more noticeable in season 2. When a Wraith Demon went after Beatrice Ava used the Halo to outright destroy it. (all without so much as messing Beatrice’s hair). We have never seen a wraith demon destroyed in such a way. Then came of course the church fight where Ava launched one of the most powerful Halo pulses ever which once again didn’t touch Ava(unlike Michael who was launched in the air like a beautiful folding chair) and yet despite this the Halo still gave Ava enough power to fly Beatrice out of there
But the biggest proof came at the finale. Why you ask? Simple. Tarasks. Obviously Adriel knew about Tarask’s and had prepared for them. As we saw in the Church when Michael threw that trident thingy Adriel’s technology worked on Tarask’s and we can safely assume the same field that interfered with the Halo also interfered with the Tarask’s ability to teleport into our world. Why else would the Tarask’s do nothing while Adriel attacks their leader Reya? And despite the fact that Ava was heavily using the Halo and we know how this attracts them they still couldn’t brake through. Until Beatrice came to Ava’s side and then Halo actually managed to break through Adriel’s defensive measures(which again are power by who knows how many millions of prayers) and it brought not one but more then half a dozens Tarasks. Why because Ava’s love for Beatrice empowered the Halo to break through, they needed to protect Beatrice so they did what should have been impossible I firmly believe that the Halo is sentient and that like all sentient thing it craves love and the more love the Halo bearer the more power the Halo gives them and the harder it fights to keep them alive
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ro-botany · 1 year
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On the Characteristics of the Risen, and the Character of their King
The Risen King... Finally, a concept which once only existed in whispers and a single cipher 0 card, has made it into a Fire Emblem video game! Just the mobile game, sure, but it counts. And the Fell Exalt Chrom unit is so fascinating to me that I have not only this, but at least two other meta posts in the pipeline about it. I am so normal about him.
To kick things off... let’s talk about exactly what Risen King Chrom is, and also how he’s doing mentally. (Badly. He’s doing very badly.)
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Real quick, we have to get one snag out of the way: the mechanism by which a Risen is made.
Shadows of Valentia introduced us to a prototypical version of the Risen created by Forneus, known as Death Masks. They’re made by fitting a dead body with a mask containing insects known as thanatophages. The thanatophages prevent the body’s decay and assert physical control over them in a manner not unlike certain real world parasites that control the muscular movements of their hosts.
I’ve seen a handful of my colleagues (lol) assume there are modern Risen made the same way. BUT. The Risen which exist during the events of Awakening are explicitly NOT Death Masks. During the xenologue Death’s Embrace, Brady states that “In the future, our wounded often turned to Risen just as we were tryin' to heal 'em.” This has to mean that Grima is transforming the dead and dying remotely, using some kind of magic; and at the height of their power, they may be either passively creating or deliberately casting an area of effect that turns dead bodies automatically. There’s nothing to suggest any Risen are manually created with thanatophages, or that Grima is manifesting thanatophages for that purpose.
Alas, we cannot do insect body horror with RK Chrom while also staying true to canon. But moving on...
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Fell Chrom is, to make an understatement, very unique among the Risen. And to discuss why he’s unique, we first have to define what’s typical.
Behaviourally, typical Risen don’t appear to have sentience outside of their competency in wielding weapons and their tendency to form loose hierarchies based on individual strength. They’re incredibly aggressive by nature; it’s like their only innate drive is to fight and kill humans. Most of them are not capable of speech, though the stronger Risen Chiefs can grind out single words or even short phrases, which are usually just related to wanting to kill things. When being actively controlled through dark magic, they appear capable of basic tactics, though whether that comes from them or the person controlling them is unclear.
There’s no doubt that Fell Chrom is a Risen. He’s certainly got the appearance, the purple miasma, and the vocal distortion for it. Not to mention the giant glowing fatal wound in his side. Man certainly isn't alive.
He’s evidently still subject to control via dark magic too, if the fact that he was forced to war against his own country is anything to go by.
Fell Chrom also has the strong aggressive drive typical of Risen. Nearly all of his dialogue in battle situations suggests this. In order of increasing intensity: There’s the turn action quote “Find me an enemy”, which depending on your mood can read as either resignation or as chomping at the bit. There’s hostile level up quotes like “You shall count yourself...among the dead” and “You would...block my path”. His special trigger quotes are yet worse. He yells “This is your fate”, “No resistance”, and “Useless effort” with a fury you don’t expect from Chrom—and for the fourth one, he just shouts “DEATH”. And his voice clips for attacking aren’t words or even anywhere in the realm of a regular human noise, they're just distorted, monstrous growling.
But unlike with typical Risen, aggression is not all RK Chrom is. He can walk around the Askran castle and be around others without constantly trying to attack people. And in fact, he’s aware of and bothered by how violent being Risen makes him. One of his status page quotes is begging someone to “back away!” in a panic, as though he’s afraid of hurting them. It’s possible the violent instincts Risen have mainly only come into play for him in battle situations, or possibly when he’s in a state of heightened emotion.
And while RK Chrom displays the kind of difficulty with speech you would expect of a Risen, with his slow halting pace and gravelly tone, he speaks in complete, coherent sentences and displays remarkable clarity about who he is and what’s happening around him. He’s no husk. Chrom's mind is intact.
That is massive. That is completely unique among Risen, and deeply, deeply horrifying. Because even though he can think, he is by no means in control.
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If the Forging Bonds supports are anything to go by, Chrom did try to resist Grima, at least in the beginning. From C through to A he moves from disbelief to outright despair at the very prospect of warring against Ylisse. But by the S support—which necessarily takes place years after the others due to how far Grima’s campaign has progressed—he’s given up. So much of his dialogue is mourning the past, or repeating Grima's belief that everyone is doomed and nothing can change. He’s not fighting it anymore. He's resigned to his fate as Grima’s executioner.
And why wouldn’t he be? After the initial confusion from being resurrected passed, he was lucid. He was fully mentally present when he was murdering his allies and slaughtering his own people. And between the deep, fundamental drive to kill and the direct influence of Grima on his actions... There wasn’t a damn thing he could do to stop himself. He couldn’t protect a thing.
Even now that he’s free of Grima’s influence in Askr, he doesn’t exactly do anything to avoid being an instrument of violence. Otherwise he wouldn’t be a playable unit. Everyone he’s ever cared about is dead, and he’s been nothing more than a monster and an instrument of violence for years. Why not fight. It’s the only thing he has left.
This Chrom is a deeply broken man. Angry and utterly hopeless. It’s no wonder after all he’s been through.
And yet... there’s still a spark there. For all his rigid insistence that Grima’s bleak outlook is the truth, his ally growth quote speaks volumes: “If this power were mine...back then...”
If fate is so immutable and hope is so pointless, why deal in what-ifs? Why wonder about what could have changed? And he’s still trying to protect people he cares about from himself; why else would he yell for others to “back away” when he feels he might attack them?
Through all the years of horror and the terrible curse of undeath... he’s still Chrom.
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chicagosfinest2021 · 2 years
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Analysis about Wakanda Forever and the ShurixNamor ship (kinda long but worth it)
So we all know that a lot of the anti ShurixNamor folks are screaming “Y’ALL ARE DISGUSTING!! HE KILLED HER MOTHER! Y’ALL SHOULD BE ASHAMED!!”
And I can just really tell that most of the folks in that camp really didn’t pay attention to the details of the movie and the series of events that happened before the unfortunate demise of Queen Ramonda.
First off I personally didn’t even ship Shuri and Namor together after seeing the movie because nothing pisses me off like writers who insist that every time two people of the opposite sex share a vibe, have chemistry, etc, that that automatically means that those two people need to have an intimate/sexual/romantic relationship. I believe that it is 100% possible for two people to have chemistry and still keep their relationship platonic and that was what I originally felt about Namor and Shuri after the end of the movie.
At this point, I defend their ship as much as I defend the writer’s decision to NOT force them into a physically intimate relationship.
I don’t know how the other shippers feel but I for one am not trying to say that at the end of the Wakanda Forever, that I wanted to see Shuri and Namor fall madly in love and trip off into the sunset together, have little brown mer-babies, etc. In fact I would definitely disown the entire Black Panther franchise if they did that. No one is saying that Shuri should just completely ignore the legacy of her mother in favor of being “booed up” to the person who was involved with her demise. However here’s a couple of things I feel like a lot of folks missed in the movie (which is why you have to watch it more than just once):
-First of all, let’s pretend like events played out differently. Let’s say that Namor still introduces Shuri to his nation, explains his origin story to her, the vibes are still vibing, etc. I think 90% of us can agree that after having a dress made for her ( ie, showing respect to her royal status) and presenting her with his deceased mother’s jewelry that that was lowkey a proposal. Namor did not *want* smoke with Wakanda, he wanted an alliance, and he made that clear with how he treated Shuri before everything popped off. He didn't WANT chaos, but at the same time he TOLD THEM what he was capable of and what he was willing to do to protect his people.  I want the folks who are against them as a couple because of the death of Ramonda to consider the possibility that if Shuri had agreed to an alliance/political marriage/whatever at that point, he probably never would have showed up to Wakanda with his super soakers and extreme water balloons a-blazin’, and multiple lives could’ve been spared.
-Secondly (and stay with me on this one!), do not forget the fact that a lot of sh*t kicked off in the first place because Namor originally wanted Riri Williams because it was her thing-a-ma-bob that allowed the Americans to be able to detect the vibranium at the bottom of the ocean in the first place. During the fight scene in Boston after Okoye and Shuri picked up Riri, the Talokan army showed up to take *Riri* back. It was Shuri who demanded to be taken to Namor to talk him down/negotiate. Now remember that later on Shuri had told Namor to spare Riri and to keep *her* instead. Now at THAT juncture, the implication was that the two of them were going to try to compromise and meet somewhere in the middle so that Namor could ensure the continued safety and secrecy of his people without having to kill Riri or spill blood in general.
Now let’s cut back to what was going on in Wakanda. Ramonda gave Okoye ONE job before she took Shuri to Boston: bring my kid back with you. Unfortunately the General did not bring the princess back with her, so not only did Queen Ramonda basically have to fire her, but she had to go all the way to Ha-EE-Ti, to hit up Nakia like, “Girl, I just had to let the General go. I need you to do me a solid and find my kid or Imma knock all this sh*t over.”
*We’re almost at the end, hang on. . .*
So Nakia accepts this assignment, does what she does best, and figures out where Shuri is. The problem is that she doesn’t know what is actually going on between Shuri and Namor; the assumption is that Shuri is in danger, so her mind set is "Find Shuri and take no prisoners". Now while all this is happening and Namor is (probably) thinking that he and Shuri can work something out, Ramonda draws him back to the surface as a semi-distraction. Now while THAT is going on, Nakia shows up and in her efforts to save Shuri and Riri, she actually kills 2 Talokanil women in the process, snatches up the two geniuses, and disappears.
Now imagine you’re Namor in this situation: you just showed this princess the upmost respect, had a dress made for her, gave her the grand tour, told her about where you came from, what you’ve been through, you realized that you both have a lot in common, and you’ve basically offered to take over the world with her (more or less). And just when you think you have earned each other’s trust and respect, THIS happens. Two of your people are dead, both the princess and your original target are gone, and a line has been hella crossed for sure.
Are y’all really gonna tell me that he was just supposed to run back to his room, turn on some music, cry and write in his journal about it?? He already told the queen and the princess that he was about the smoke, did folks really think he was bluffing? And don’t forget, it was T’Challa who had basically revealed to the world about vibranium in the first place, and thereby opening Wakanda and the ocean floor to anyone seeking to pillage this priceless resource. (So yes, Wakanda is partially responsible for the predicament Namor found himself in in the first place.) So when he flooded/attacked Wakanda, we may not have liked it but he did not do anything that Wakanda would not have done if *they* had been in his situation.
And finally (and this is the one that’s really going to piss people off).
Yes, Ramonda drowned because of Namor's exploding water balloons, but. . .she probably would not have perished had she not sacrificed herself trying to save Riri (again, the person who Namor originally wanted in the first place).
Now again, to the people who say Namor x Shuri is an abomination because he caused her mother’s death. . .would you have felt any better if Ramonda had offered Riri to him in the first place? If she had said “You know what? I hate to do it, but I’m willing to sacrifice this girl in order to keep the crazy fishman off our back and to protect my daughter and my country”, would y’all have backed her play? Or condemned her? Because the same way Ramonda was somebody's mother, Riri is somebody's child.
Or if she had just let Riri drown in order to save herself, you’re telling me that would’ve sat well with you all? What if she *had* let Riri drown and was the only one who knew the truth (because no one else was there), how long do you think it would’ve taken before she told her daughter the truth? How do you think Shuri would have reacted?
My point is there are a couple of ways that scenario could’ve gone. Personally, I wish the writers hadn’t gone down that route at all, but at the end of the day, Ramonda died a noble death trying to save Riri, whom herself was unintentionally responsible for a lot of the sh*t that popped off. And even Riri admitted it after the fact, but I don’t see anyone coming for *her* though.
The bottomline is I think a lot of us can/do agree that Queen Ramonda should not have been written out the way she was at all, but folks are a long way away from trying to make Namor out to just be this ruthless, two-faced, cold-blooded killer. If you handed a “Congrats on doing the wrong things for the right reasons” award to Killmonger in the first BP movie, I don’t see how you wouldn't do the same for Namor. This isn’t even a “Because he looks sexy in his hoochie-daddy shorts and that makes him immune to criticism” argument, this is a “There is a 90% chance that his argument would hold up in a court of law and he would have to do community service and probation at best” situation. No one is saying we forgot how Queen Ramonda lost her life, we’re saying look at the broader picture.
And since I’m on a roll, I’m not saying Shuri and Namor *have* to get together in the future films, but based off his speech and actions (and scenes that were cut from the movie) Namor already felt something for Shuri, I wouldn’t even call it physical or romantic attraction even, but he saw something familiar in her, and from my experience that’s not something men will shake right away. Not to mention typically in both reality and mythology, when a powerful man is defeated/out-smarted by a woman. . .it doesn’t take long for the infatuation to set in LOL
Plus Shuri is literally the princess (or queen depending on your perspective)/Black Panther/head scientist of the most powerful nation in the world and now she’s seen HIS world. She may not be a demi-god but in Namor’s mind, she’s probably the closest thing he has to an equal. He caused chaos because he had been betrayed and did what he felt he had to do. He was called “the boy without love” but the love he had for his mother and for his people moved him to do whatever it took to keep them from having to surrender themselves and their vibranium to the colonizers. I’m not saying that his goals don’t need some fine tuning but he is the antagonist in the movie, not the villain.  Even *Shuri* finally figured it out in the end; she could've killed Namor but even while still grieving for her mother, she understood the bigger picture; killing him would've risked eternal war and cost more innocent lives. And I guarantee you by the time Namor went back to his lil cave to paint his fanart of his fight with Shuri, he realized the bigger picture too.
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atenea14 · 1 month
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Chapter 1: A New Path
In the Wake of Heroes
Soulmates AU
Pairing: Katsuki x Eijiro x Shoto x Izuku x OC (not physically described though)
Warnings: Season 7 spoilers, events of the anime not represented accurately, soulmates AU, slow burn, not beta read, nothing else for now.
Word count: 5.4k
Previous chapter Masterlist
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This is Amemiya Noa, in a dramatic turn of events, the combined forces of our top heroes have successfully subdued the notorious villains All For One and Shigaraki Tomura. The battle, which raged across the country, saw intense clashes that pushed both heroes and villains to their limits. While the victory marks a significant triumph for justice, it comes at
Someone turns off the TV, while everybody is glad the nightmare is coming to and end nobody feels like celebrating while waiting in the waiting room of the hospital reserved for heroes. 
Saya’s POV: 
My muscles feel like they weigh nothing yet all my body feels heavy and I cannot move, I’m not sure how that even makes sense. I want to open my eyes but I’m too stunned to react, someone comes and goes because I hear voices although I can’t understand what they’re saying. It’s too much and I fall back into my slumber without even noticing. 
The next time I recover consciousness I’m able to open my eyes and slowly take in my surroundings, it looks like I’m in a hospital room. Someone speaks and it takes me a while to realise that is my father who’s calling for a doctor. It is not until that night that I fully recover control and I’m able to sit up in bed, dad fills me in, we’ve won, well for now. Their villain network needs to be fully dismantled and I’m already itching to be a part of the investigation team, it was the deal I made with the national agency in exchange for my intervention. I also get notified that some heroes have been severely injured and some have had their limbs torn off. A couple of doctors approach me to know if I’d be willing to try and completely regenerate the limbs with my dual quirk and I find myself as excited to do that as I am to help intel services. The next couple of days pass quickly, luckily my injuries could be healed thanks to Recovery Girl and I could focus on experimenting with the doctors on limb regeneration. 
Some days later an announcement was made to the heroes involved.
Thanks to Saya's quirk, we can now fully regenerate human limbs. The procedure will involve her healing abilities to precisely repair and reconstruct damaged tissues and bones, complemented by advanced regenerative technology that supports cellular integration and function. This approach will restore not only the physical structure but also the functional capabilities of the limb. We anticipate that patients will achieve full recovery and regain complete limb functionality within 4 to 8 months, depending on the injury's severity and individual healing response. 
I frown upon hearing the cheerful voices of the doctors.
- It sounds amazing but… it’s still completely experimental, we’re going to experiment with living persons, what if I end up creating an amorphic mass of human tissue? -
- The heroes will be warned and their participation in the program is voluntary. Actually we already have the first candidate. - I change my weight from one foot to the other and slightly tilt my head. 
- Who?- The doctor gives me a soft smile. 
- Curiously enough, your favourite hero who now claims she’s your number one fan, Mirko - My heart starts to race thinking I’ll be able to really talk to her and by the expressions of the doctors I haven’t concealed my excitement at all. 
- Come on let’s go see her. - 
I follow them to her hospital room, there’s a lot of people in the hallway and I can see a bunch of famous heroes roaming around but I don’t care a lot about them at the moment, the fact that my first patient will be her makes me have crippling anxiety. 
It has to go well. But she’s really injured, it is a difficult case for starters, what were they thinking? Someone with a minor injury like a lost finger would be more appropriate. Oh my god what am I going to do? 
- Hey kid, don’t tell me I scare you more than Shigaraki? You looked fearless back then but now you’re as white as my hair.- What? I focus my gaze again and realise Mirko is in a bed in front of me and everybody is looking at me. 
- Uhm… No I…- The head doctor lightly pats me on the back and smiles. 
- She’s a great fan of yours so she must be nervous. - I somehow manage to regain my composure and interrupt the small talk they are all making. 
- That’s not true. - A dead silence follows my statement and I realise how it must have sounded. - I mean, I am your fan and I am excited to meet you but I’m worried about the procedure. I’m aware you’ve given your informed consent but the extent of your injuries is one of the most severe so starting with your case is probably not the best idea. - 
- That’s fine I don’t have much to lose and if you can heal me you’ll surely be ready to care for the rest of the injured ones so you’ll learn a lot with me. - Mirko gives me a big smile while she points a finger at herself. 
- But…- 
- Well, Saya’s concern is valid. That's why we will start with your hands, move to other heroes and once the procedure succeed has been confirmed we’ll try with your leg. Does that sound good to everybody?.- Mirko agrees and the medical staff leaves to start preparing the room. 
- Come, sit with me.- Mirko points to the bed with her head and I do what she wants. - Come on, don't be so stiff, I… You don’t know how much you mean to me right now. Your presence on the battlefield has been crucial. I'm sure there would have been irreparable damage if it weren’t for you. And now I have the hope of a second chance because you have a crazy quirk. If this ends in disaster I’ll still be eternally glad, so just do your best and don’t worry about anything else, yes?.- Once she stops speaking I look at her and she starts laughing, if I was blushing before now I’m cosplaying a tomato. I exhale, chuckle a little and nod.
- Okay. It will go well. - 
- Of course it will! You’re really cute I promise to give you a bone crushing hug as soon as I can. - I smile to myself. 
- Or we could fight.- She gets confused and I point at myself, then at her - You, me and a training ring.- I smile and nod while she bursts laughing. 
- It’s a promise. - A nurse enters the room and says that the room is ready. 
This first session has been exhausting, a lot of hours have passed and we’ve managed to reconstruct one of her hands, the doctors say it looks good so I’m thriving but I’m so tired… my eyes can’t seem to focus and while I lose my balance I feel a sharp pain. 
- Hello! Good evening sleeping beauty. - What? I center my gaze and realise that the white blurr is Mirko who’s sitting by my bed. 
- What are you doing here? You should be resting.- 
- And I am resting! I just happen to do so by your side. You fainted after the operation was finished, it seems your body is still too weak to endure a prolonged use of your quirk without consequences so the rest of your interventions have been postponed. -
- I see. And how are you feeling? - 
- It’s really weird, I’ll still need some sessions with the surgeons for my hand to be ready and then I’ll need physiotherapy but I’ve been told that the evolution is favourable so far so I’m really happy! - I smile at her.
- Your energy is contagious, I already feel better. Thanks for making me company. - 
- Don’t thank me, is the least I could do. By the way your father has been here all day but about an hour ago he had to leave for work. He's an agent of some kind, isn't he? - 
- Yes, he is. He works in national security. - 
- Oh, that explains why his colleagues were borderline harassing him for coming in to work. They are overwhelmed with work right now. Well, don’t worry I won’t go anywhere. -
An hour later Mirko has fallen asleep in the wheelchair it doesn’t look comfortable so I ask a nurse to get her to her room. Taking advantage of the fact that I'm alone, I go to the hospital food machine, I'm a bit hungry and it will be good to stretch my legs. I move slowly because my whole body still hurts, the corridors are still as lively as yesterday and today I do pay attention to the stares I'm attracting yet I ignore them all. Luckily the food machine is in a much quieter corner so I can stand up, lean against the wall and sigh deeply as I bring a hand to my chest. The walk is proving to be more strenuous than I thought. Once my heart rate has slowed down I just walk over to the machine and stare at it, trying to decide what I want to eat. Someone clears his throat behind me and I'm startled out of my wits. I haven't heard anyone approaching so I turn around abruptly and because of that the stabbing pain runs through me again and I lose my balance. 
Someone clears his throat behind me and I'm startled out of my wits. I haven't heard anyone approaching so I turn around abruptly and because of that the stabbing pain runs through me again and I lose my balance. Immediately I feel many hands grabbing me so that I don't fall, at that moment I feel a torrent of energy enveloping us and a blinding light appears in our midst. The hands grip me tighter and after a few seconds I come to my senses. I look around me and see four guys just as confused as I am, I recognise two from the battlefield. They are all very close to me, still holding me. I lean on the arm of one of them to regain my stability. 
- Ahm... thanks I guess? Have you used your quirk?-  They all look at me completely confused and slowly let go of me. 
- I thought it was you. - A boy with red hair looks at me very intensely. 
- I didn't activate my quirk. -They also deny having used their powers. 
- So what was that? - This time the boy with heterochromia speaks. 
- Are you all idiots or what? - That's the guy I fought Shigaraki with, the one with a knack for explosions. I stare at him in confusion, why is he being so rude?
- Kacchan... - The other guy I fought with tries to calm him down. 
- You've noticed it too, haven't you? How can they be so slow? - Oh... oh no, no no no no no. It's not possible. This wasn’t a soulmate activation moment was it? Is this a bad thing? Is this a good thing? But it's very unexpected and which one of them is my soul mate? Are all four of them? What's supposed to happen now? Oh, my anxiety is getting out of control again. Too many emotions in such a short time, I need some fresh air. 
- Oh stop it Katsuki. - 
- Ah? You don’t tell me what to do shit hair. - 
- Are you alright? - The green haired boy and the one with heterochromia look at me concerned while the red hair smacks ‘Katsuki’ on the back of his head.
- Look at her you dumbass. - The moment is getting more chaotic by the second and we had attracted a small crowd. I turn around so I can get out of there but again I get a pinch and my knees give out, I feel them grabbing me again but this time it's only the people who weren't arguing who help me. 
- Are you OK, can you hear us? - The boy I fought with is the one who asks me. 
- Yeah just... I just need some fresh air. I want to go outside. - I finally manage to speak and in a moment I'm being pulled up in some arms princess style. 
- Kacchan be careful! - 
- I have it but she said she wants to get out of here and clearly she can't walk. I'm just going to carry her. - He stops talking for a second and stares at me very intently. - Is it okay if I carry you?- I stare dumbfounded for a few seconds until I nod. 
After that everyone starts to walk and we get closer to the small crowd, I don't know where to put myself, I'm ashamed to call attention this way, without noticing I grab the boy's t-shirt, I clench my fist and I hook as much as I can to him. In response he pulls me tighter to him and looks at me as he keeps walking. 
- Look at me. The others are just extras. - It's incredibly self-centered, but it's still comforting. 
- Shoto - 
- Not now father. - 
Before I know it we’re all in the back garden of the hospital. The area is suspiciously empty but I don’t pay much attention to it. He gently sets me down on a bench and I take the moment to bask in the soft rays of the afternoon sun. I’m completely calmed now. 
- I’m sorry I… - The green haired boy frantically moves his hands in a negative moment. 
- No no no it’s okay… It’s been a shock for us as well. - We all fall into a weird silence before the guy with heterochromia breaks it. 
- So… That was really…? - He clears his throat. - I mean… We’re soulmates right? 
- Yes - Katsuki speaks in a more softer voice. - Are you feeling any better? - 
- Yes, I am thank you. - I give him a soft smile and he just nods and averts his eyes. 
- What do we do now? - The red haired boy asks but nobody answers straight away. My voice makes them all look back at me again making my nervousness increase. 
- Uhm… I don’t know what we should do but I’d like to know your names. - I fidget with my hands while talking. The smiles that the red and green haired guys give me ease my nerves. 
- Of course! I’m Midoriya Izuku, my hero name is Deku and I study at the UA, well we all do. - Before I can answer he starts rumbling a lot of information but luckily the other bubbly guy puts a hand in his shoulder and interrupts him. 
- That’s fine Izuku. My name is Kirishima Eijiro also known as Red Riot but I’d like you to call me by my given name, not but my hero one. - I gently smile at him but my attention is quickly diverted. 
- I’m Todoroki Shoto, my hero name is also Shoto so you don’t have much choice. - That makes me chuckle. 
- Really? You weren’t inspired at all? - He gives me a soft smile.
- I couldn’t imagine myself being called something else than my name. - 
- Well I like it, it’s a pretty name. - Shoto blushes while Eijiro points at himself. 
- What do you think about my name? - 
- It’s pretty too and your hero name really matches your style. - He grins even more. 
- Right? Is so man…- The one who carried me interrupts him by putting one hand in his face. 
- I’m Bakugo Katsuki also called Great Explosion Murder God Dynamight. - That surprises me and I chuckle while answering.
- That’s surprisingly long. - 
- And literally nobody calls him that, his hero name is just Dynamight. - Katsuki frowns at this and clenches his fist.
- Ah? Do you want to pick a fight shit hair? - Eijiro doesn’t seems to mind the moniker and starts bickering with him. The situation is so transcendental in our lives yet the moment is being so stupid I cannot help it and I burst out laughing out loud, they all stare at me and they chuckle a little while Katsuki seems to pout. 
- I’m sorry I… My name is Yukine Saya and I don’t have a hero name because I don’t want to be one. - They all look at me as if I had grown another head.
- Too late for you then. - I tilt my head at Katsuki not understanding. - You should have thought of that before throwing yourself in the middle of the battle of the century. - 
- Well but that doesn’t make me a hero. I was just doing what I was asked to do. - 
- But you put yourself in danger to help other people! That’s what heroes do, you don’t need anything else to be one. - Izuku seems really agitated for some reason, his statement confuses me but I don’t pay much attention to it.
- Anyway I’m not planning on making any public appearances so people won’t know me. - They all look at me with somber faces. 
- And would that be a bad thing? For people to know you? - Shoto quietly asks. 
- Yes, it would interfere with my life goals. - 
- And what are those? - This time it is Izuku who asks. 
- I’d like to enter the interpol, as an agent and center my career pursuing serial killers and organised crime so I need an anonymous identity. - Their stern hardens more. - What? Is there a problem? - They look at each other not knowing what to say until Izuku speaks.
- Well… you’ll see your achievements and your face are all over the internet. People love you… - 
- What? For real? Has a lot of people seen it? - 
- It’s gone completely viral. I’m sorry. - Although Katsuki speaks in a gentle voice his attempt fails at making this better for me. The anxiety that had dissipated suddenly comes back only that is worse this time and I cover my face with my hands while I bend down to rest my head between my knees. 
- It’s alright… we are with you now. - Someone rubs my back and after some time I raise my head and I wipe some tears with my hands. 
- I’m fine, don’t worry. - I realise that Eijiro has sat down by my side and he’s the one caressing me.
- Don’t lie, you are shaking. You aren’t fine. - I haven’t realised I was shaking until Katsuki pointed it out. 
- It’s just… this weeks have been crazy and I just have a lot of emotions to process. It’s alright. - Katsuki frowns at me. 
- No it’s not, your dream has been jeopardised, that's not ok and you can be sincere about it. I know I'd be losing it. - 
- I’m… - I find myself dumbfounded and start shaking more. Katsuki sits on my other side and he an Eijiro hug me tightly. I didn’t realise how much I needed a hug until that moment and I start sobbing, my breathing becomes more ragged by the moment. Izuku kneels down before me and gently places a hand on one knee an rubs it while Shoto approaches me and caresses the top of my head while he keeps standing. He softly rearranges my hair so it’s not in my face and caresses my cheek. I feel overwhelmed with all the sudden attention but I also feel a weird sense of calmness. Nobody says anything until my anxiety attack calms down and now I’m just whimpering. 
- Oh my what a great first impression I’m giving. - All of them squeeze me tighter upon hearing me. 
- Well you did give us a hell of a first impression kicking Shigaraki’s ass. - I look at Katsuki and he brushes a lock of hair behind my ear. 
- That’s true! So don’t worry about today, we understand. - Know my focus is on Izuku, he has such a gentle gaze. He looks like a puppy. 
- I know it’s a lot to process but I think you can still achieve your dreams but maybe not in the way you expected. - I look at Shoto.
- What do you mean? - I lightly tilt my head to the side and accidentally head bump Eijiro. - Ouch, I’m sorry.- I rub my head while apologising, he just laughs. 
- That’s fine! I’m unbreakable, a meak bump won’t do me anything! - Izuku is not the only one with golden retriever energy. I gently smile at him while he grins at me. 
- I think Icy Hot is right. - 
- Yes! Heroes save people so you can still work in that field, plus that’s teamwork and there are a lot of positions needed to be filled so there’s more than the anonymous agent one. - My heart beat starts to calm down, what they are saying makes sense. 
- And you still can go undercover missions, if needed you’ll find a way. There’s a lot of technology and some people have quirks that alter appearances. In a big agency there is probably someone who has an ability like that. - Of course, how silly of me. 
- So I just need to readapt my plans to find a new path to achieve it…- They all grin at me and Katsuki pats my head. 
- Yes! And now we are here to help you too. - Katsuki keeps cheering me up. 
- You know you can learn a lot by being a hero so it would be really beneficial for you! - Izuku starts rumbling again about training and the UA. - Oh by the way I don’t understand how your quirk works. It’s a combined one isn’t it? It seems amazing! - He keeps looking at me with hopeful eyes and I’m aware that all of them are extremely curious about my answer but I just look down and fidget with my hands. 
- Uhm… I’m not supposed to talk about it. I’m… a lot of people close to me have close relationships with security agencies and so some things happened and my quirk is now confidential… I’m sorry… I’ll… I’ll ask if I can tell you. - I don’t dare to look back up. 
- We understand, it’s okay. We’ve just met after all, let’s not rush anything. - Shoto gently reassures me. 
Before we can keep talking a nurse with a wheelchair comes to find me and asks me to go with her for a general check-up. This time it is Eijiro the one who helps me move and sit in the chair. While the nurse is dragging me away I look back at them and realise they're all staring at me so I blush and quickly avert my eyes while the nurse chuckles.
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evolutionsvoid · 9 months
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Yes, yes we all know what this species does! Its method of warding off predators is quite infamous, but there is more to this creature than that! The whole entry can't be about it, so lets try to keep it together!
The Bonnacon is a species of bovine that inhabits plains, grasslands and some savannas. They are about the same size as your domesticated cow, though a few physical features cause them to stand out (and I am not talking about that one). First off is their reddish brown fur, which is made even more striking with the fiery coloration of their skin and dewlap. These bright oranges are hard to miss, as this is not a species that cares about blending in! Another feature is the mane of brown hair that runs down their neck, almost similar to that of a horse's. And while we are looking at its head, the next thing to note is their horns. Compared to other bovines, these horns can seem a bit small. On top of that, they are curled so that no sharp points are exposed, and are positioned upon the head in such a way that they wouldn't do much when it comes to charging and ramming. Even if they were larger, the materials that makes up these horns is noticeably weaker than other bovine horns, making these horns bend under pressure. In truth, if a Bonnacon charged you, the real pain would be coming from this massive ungulate ramming into you, and not so much the pitiful horns. Yes, there are worse things they can do to you, but we aren't on that subject yet! 
Bonnacon travel in small herds, and spend a large portion of their days grazing. They feed upon a wide variety of vegetation, with very few plants exempt from their menu. One of the major notes of their diet is that they graze upon plants that are typically poisonous to most other herbivores. Other plant eaters avoid these particular shrubs or growths like the plague, while the Bonnacon munches upon them without a care in the world. From what we understand, their digestive system is capable of handling a variety of toxins, and uses particular chemicals found in nasty plants as fuel for something else (no, we aren't talking about that part yet). This gives this bovine a wider selection of plants to choose from when feeding, and it also means a food source free from competition. For the ecosystem, they play an important part in keeping these poisonous and noxious plants in check, preventing them from growing out of control due to zero grazing.
When mating season kicks in, the male Bonnacon's look to round up as many females as possible, though the competition between them is not as violent as other bovines. While you may expect them battering each other with their horns and resorting to violence, such fights rarely break out. I will remind you that their horns are pretty poor for battle, though they do have a purpose here. Apparently, these horns are good indicators of health and virility, so simply showing them off is enough to woo the ladies. When it comes to keeping away competing males, they raise their tails and show off the colorful markings on their rumps (Just the rumps! Nothing else yet). These too are representative of their health and strength, and other males can easily gauge if this is a fight they can win. Most of the time, these displays are enough to defuse the situation, with the lesser Bonnacon accepting that they could never win this battle. If it comes to fighting, it is done through awkward body battering and tail whips, more akin to a drunken shoving match than any legitimate brawl. This species isn't exactly known for the most dignified ways of warding off foes. 
And now that I have gone over the Bonnacon facts that everyone will skip over, it is time for the part all the readers came for. Lets all ask the question that will get us there: "Hey Chlora, how do Bonnacon ward off predators?" Good question, children! Well, the Bonnacon has a super secret weapon up its sleeve whenever a big mean carnivore comes to eat it! When the big bad wolf comes creeping up, the poor little Bonnacon lifts its tail up and fires off a wet blast of caustic fecal matter that will douse the land and predator in a brown burning shower of shit that would make any public outhouse blowout after a dinner of bad fish tacos look like a lazy day of beach reading! THERE! WE'RE AT THE POOP PART! ARE YOU HAPPY!? Now we get to talk about how the Bonnacon fights its battles with fiery turd farts! YIPPEE!
Now that I got that out of my system, indeed the Bonnacon weaponizes its own fecal matter. It seems that there is a combination of chemicals brought in from its diet mixed in with its own special intestinal secretions that create this effect. All this is infused into its waste, and it appears that the act of ejecting it from its bowels starts the reaction. When the feces is sprayed from its body, a reaction within kicks off which creates the rise in temperature and creation of caustic fluids. While this waste does not actually catch on fire, the high heat of it combined with its acidic coating certainly gives the feeling of being set aflame while it burns through your skin. Their "ejection" system is specially designed to release this waste with long distance and wide range. It is meant to either catch the predator within the burning cone of filth, or create a hazard so foul that any meat eater would think twice before pursuing. Typically this butt blast is fired off just before the Bonnacon flees, which some humorous folk have interpreted into this species launching itself to safety by the propulsion of its own fiery flatulence. Oh what a lark.
Obviously, ammunition for this kind of firepower is limited, and thus the Bonnacon must use it sparingly between meals. This is why they bear the bright orange and dark markings upon their rump, as they serve as a warning sign to potential predators. When threatened, they will raise their tails to fully show off these colors, as a "last chance" for their foe before they open fire. You may also notice that these behinds lack hair, and that is because they don't want their own feces getting caught in their fur. Would be quite the mess to get out! 
Outside of the endless crude jokes and comments one can mine from the Bonnacon's existence, they do actually have a place in the local culture. Due to their diet of nasty plants, they can be used to clear land that has been overgrown by noxious and dangerous weeds. Their hide has been found to make resilient leather, the kind that is resistant to caustic agents and damaging fluids. Their meat....well, most people avoid it. Due to their diet, it can contain some nasty stuff unless it is thoroughly cooked to a crisp. Even then, you won't find a lot of folk willing to have a taste once they learn what beast it comes from. I, for one, gave it a try when I found a reputable chef that was known for preparing it. It was...fine. Nothing to write home about, but it certainly didn't have the flavors most people would expect when coming from a Bonnacon. And of course, we can't ignore their feces, as that even has a use! It turns out, Bonnacon waste is actually a really good fertilizer, once you let it cool down and its fluids grow inert. But sometimes, that burning pile of poo has its uses! If you want to prepare a field or flower bed, and know it is loaded with wild seeds of weeds you don't want, then lay down a layer of fresh Bonnacon poop. The heat and acidity of it will bake out all the seeds and roots that are waiting down below, and then add nutrients once it has burned itself out. In fact, some species of plant have designed their seeds to only be spread and germinated by Bonnacon waste! So we've taken a note from these plants and use it to clear out our flower beds! Now your garden is ready for planting! It is a pretty clever way to do it, but just be ready to get a lot of complaints from your neighbors.        
Chlora Myron
Dryad Natural Historian
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"Bonnacon"
Ah the infamous Bonnacon! The ol' mammalian bombardier beetle! Had to show up sooner or later.
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rayssyscourse · 2 months
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I sent this ask to someone else but I'd like to ask more systems - may I ask what your opinion is on subjective reality within systems? Systems that don't have consistency in the headspace, or a consistent timeline, consistent memories...that sort of thing. I'm struggling a bit with that now and it's really freaking me out :( so I'd love to hear your take, if you'd be willing!
i love this topic!! before I start yapping I'll add the disclaimer that I'm gonna try not to get all science-y on you, but I am That Guy who reads about quantum physics for fun (dear god I need hobbies) so somebody feel free to poke me if this gets rambley, lol.
so, the first things I want to make clear are as follows: a) subjective reality is not necessarily less real than objective reality, and b) it's not specific to systems/plurals, although it can be more influential to us than to singlets.
subjective reality is super important to everyone, plural or not. without it, we would have no opinions, we wouldn't be able to observe the world as a narrative, and we would basically just be vessels for regurgitating information about what we see. since our subjective perceptions and assumptions about reality are what make up the way we see the world and interact with it, they are as real to us as objective reality is, the only difference being that they are specific/unique to us.
with systems, for the most part each headmate is capable of observing their own subjective reality. in the same way you and I might see the same flower and form different opinions about it, it's basically the same thing within systems, with the exception of the fact that systems are sharing a brain. I think what you might be talking about is the cognitive dissonance that can happen when your brain is perceiving multiple different versions of subjective reality at once. if you and another headmate are perceiving two conflicting things simultaneously, it can create a cognitive dissonance thing where your brain doesn't know how to handle two conflicting perceptions, and can make stuff like brain fog, derealization, and just general confusion way worse.
it's not the exact same thing, but I think it's similar to people who suffer from delusions or hallucinations, where their brain is perceiving/trying to perceive something new or different that does not line up with the person's non-delusional interpretation of reality. again, not the exact same thing, but my amateur theory is that it might be a similar conflict.
also, since things like memories and headspace are primarily mental constructs, they're more susceptible to cognitive errors. it's possible for our brains to actually alter our memories unconsciously if the altered version makes more sense for our narrative of reality, so it only makes sense for that to potentially be especially prominent within systems, where there is more opportunities for conflicting perceptions to come up.
if we want to get technical, it's entirely possible (and common) for things to exist in multiple conflicting states simultaneously, but our brains REALLY don't like that and that's where we enter the field of quantum physics, so I'm gonna cut myself off here, lol. (if you're interested I can point you to some fascinating articles, but that's physics not psychology lmao).
aaaanyways, hope this helps or was at least interesting to read!! the most important thing to remember is that just because you and a headmate have conflicting perceptions doesn't necessarily mean one is right and one is wrong; also remember that the brain can be wrong about things and it's okay to be confused and need some time/space to work things out. even singlets can get confused about this stuff too, it's just part of being fallible sentient humans in a very strange world!
thanks for the ask, and have a lovely day!!! <3
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windfalljng · 3 months
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was thinking really really hard the other night about the windfalls. promise and volo are opposites in so many different ways it's sucking the normal juice out of me and i have to talk about this to someone other than my 4 twitter followers who don't give a fuck about voidpet characters. i get way too nervous to type paragraphs in the discord so instead of that i think i will spread it here... lots of words warning. i haven't gone over this for editing because i am tired. schade
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there are a lot of little design pieces i want to talk about but to start off with some obvious comparisons... we have simple stuff like their personalities (volo being more closed off while promise lives on attention. introvert extrovert difference). but the first thing i thought of has to do with volo excelling physically versus promise with his immense mental strength... particularly on promise's capabilities, in the windfall family slideshow posted by linda on tiktok she actually does go over promise's lack of physical strength with points like. "will lose to a regular human in a fistfight" (hilarious) and "fights sitting down with his eyes closed" (less proving. maybe just there because it's fucking silly but i'm adding it here as reason anyways) promise is mentally powerful but weaker physically while on the contrary volo is noted to be physically powerful. they're like on opposite sides of the damage type thing. coin
this one is especially prominent in the stage descriptions but there's the way they push promise's villainy theme and emphasize his questionable morals far more than they do for any of the siblings while volo is like the only one out of the four windfall children who's doing something that's good for the world such as running a charity or becoming a surgeon... building off of this there's also the fact that it was specifically stated in the broadway video that volo is his favourite child while he is PERPETUALLY DISAPPOINTED IN HIS SON PROMISE!!! as broadway is a philanthropist i feel like he is probably quite proud of volo for helping society. similarly the whole villain thing promise has going on conflicts with broadway's superhero thing so yeah. "doubles down on greedy villain aesthetic to spite dad" congratulations it worked
then there's small shit like promise's eyes being Unbelievably Fucking Bright, even brighter than both pecunia and pandora's, in comparison to volo's which are the darkest throughout all of the siblings' stages, even without counting for the later changes in eye colour which literally turn the sclera black. truthfully this one was a bit of a stretch and i think arguments concerning eye colour fit a lot better in a different group of thoughts but i want to include it anyways because why are promise's eyes so fucking bright oh my god
more seriously though there's also how volo's passion lies with studying voidpets and a lot of what he does generally concerns helping other people while promise's focus thing is his own quest for power which is objectively way more selfish. amd then if u compare their stage 5 descriptions from garden you can look at promise and see how it's implied especially at that point that promise wanting to focus on self care and taking it easy, combined with the fact that he's always online, shows that by stage 5 he honestly isn't very productive anymore because he's already found his successes and feels like there's kind of nothing more he needs to do. so he doesn't do more. he's living comfortably with minimal further involvement in working... like it doesn't even tell us which branch of windfall inc. he leads when all the other siblings have one mentioned in their stage 5 description (volo nonprofit, pecunia finances, pandora is chair)
and speaking of the other windfall children if we go back to volo guess what the fuck he's doing in stage 5. he continues to be successful in fundraising! he runs the nonprofit of windfall inc.! and in his spare time what the fuck does he do? does he take time off like a normal person? relax like his brother promise? no he's a FUCKING SURGEON WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH HIM this guy does NOT take breaks. which is completely opposite promise who by the end of his stages seems like he's kind of doing Nothing. genuinely promise takes enough time off for the two of them combined
i feel like the most interesting comparison between the two has to do with their own kind of recovery... in one of linda's tiktoks she explains that in voidpet the heroes (freshmen) represent trauma and the villains (windfalls) represent healing. volo's healing is basically him not giving a fuck about what other people think of him and promise's healing is loving himself / taking care ofhimself. however promise doesn't have volo's in the way that he does give a fuck about what kind of attention he gets from other people he may actually give too much of a fuck... volo ends up learning not to care what other people think while his brother promise actually does care a lot about attention and the way he is perceived. unexpectedly i was thinking about this several days before any of the other points and i think it's really cool how promise's recovery, his intense love of himself, might end up fuelling an egotistical desire for attention... not cool in the way that it's necessarily a good thing for him but it. gives me thoughts. many thoufhts
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(real tweet by me. i'm still in a crisis)
don't think i'll get far into it in this post because it's a bit much to write about and my initial thread was rather personal and i really really do not want to get into the raskolnikov complex at 4 in the morning because that will absolutely set me off into space. i may have been projecting and i am not Quite ready to post it on public internet. there are too many words for me to write i don't know if i can do this. oh my fucking god these characters make me so??? i have to keep talking about them or i will explode. it's so over
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lumine-no-hikari · 2 months
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Dear Sephiroth: (a letter to a fictional character, because why not) #231
I was hoping to rest today, but today was filled with lots of stuff.
I went to therapy first thing, and talked a lot about the events of Otakon, about you, and about what I tried to do. I told my therapist a lot more about the event than I wrote in my letters; I'm somewhat afraid of writing them down, getting my hopes up, and ending up disappointed.
They seemed proud of me, though. My therapist, I mean. It's not normal for me to so boldly take up space even with ordinary people, let alone with people powerful enough to weave your fate. If it's for you, though, I can probably rise up to any challenge, no matter how scary it is.
It's in their hands. We'll see what happens in a few years, I suppose.
I saw the dandelion-floof-haired man today, who gave me a pin that he made himself because he liked my Eevee hat; I wrote about him some time ago. Maybe you remember, or maybe not. Either way, he invited me to eat lunch together and to talk about various things at a nearby diner. He seems nice enough; I doubt he'd want to do anything weird to me, and even if he did, I am more than capable of defending myself if I have to. We ate; I got stuffed mushrooms, but I was a bit too soup-brained to think to take any pictures of them for you; I'm sorry. Still, they were some of the best ones I've ever had. They were filled with a kind of seafood stuffing; I wonder if you would have liked them.
He asked me what I've been up to. Lately, I had been elbows deep in preparing myself for the convention and the thing I am trying to do for you, so I spoke about that, along with my rationale. He seemed to understand, and he related to me with similar experiences and thoughts of his own, and it was very good!
By the time that was done with, I had to go to physical therapy. Because my day of the week changed from Wednesday to Tuesday due to now having a bakery job, I am seeing a new person named K. Because K is unfamiliar with me, he began with an evaluation. And for this evaluation, he checked out my ribcage. I had not yet had an evaluation of the integrity of my ribcage done (which is weird, considering I have a RIB injury…), but it was done today, and it was discovered that, while the left side of my ribcage is springy and bouncy in all the ways that it's supposed to be, the whole right side of my ribcage is, for whatever reason, not doing ANY of what it's supposed to do.
If you push on the right side, it doesn't spring back to its original position on its own; it just kind of stays deflated. In fact, it's not expanding properly when I breathe, either, which means that instead of my intercostal muscles and diaphragm doing the work of breathing on the right side of my body, my neck and shoulder is trying to do that work instead, and the result, naturally, is strain in those muscles, which is why they are perpetually tight. My pelvis is also apparently rotated relative to my ribcage, as my body's way of trying to compensate for the fact that the right side of my ribcage is refusing to move or do anything.
Hopefully this might mean that we're one step closer to figuring out what exactly the problem is, and fixing it. Suppose we'll see. It'll be nice to be able to use my right arm again, to laugh, to sing, to yawn, to sneeze, and to breathe deeply and to turn my head without pain. I'm hesitant to get my hopes up, but still… maybe it could work out. Maybe. I'm in a lot of pain all the time, and I'm not able to do any of the things I used to love to do with any kind of consistency, and putting on that bra and that corset belt for the costume (in service to looking the part of someone who is capable of trying to help you) left me messed up for a couple days, and while I tried to put on a brave face so nobody at the convention would know and think I'm weak for it… still… I'm tired and I want this injury, whatever it is, to go away and never come back.
…Sephiroth, I want so badly to return to the water and resume my mermaid training. I'd say you have no idea, but I imagine you might miss eating a nice big bowl of pasta pescatore, or feeling the breeze and the sun and the rain on your skin, and being able to look at trees and mountains and valleys and plains and sky with just as much, if not even more fervor. Hopefully, you'll be able to do all those things again, and more, relatively soon. What I wouldn't give to see you smile and dance, and to hear you laugh and sing. I want that even more than I want the pain in my ribs to stop. If I had the choice between your safety and my own body's healing, then that's an easy one; I'd choose your safety every time, without question.
Well anyway. The ribcage evaluation left me in quite a lot of pain after the fact. I had intended to get some pizza, and maybe some frozen yogurt, and then go home and do the dishes piled up in the sink (it was expected; I was gone from home for a bunch of consecutive days, trying to help you…), but in the end, I was in enough pain that I couldn't do any of those. So instead, I went home and did some leisure writing.
It's J's birthday today. And J isn't really much of a birthday celebration kind of person, but still, he and M and I went out for ice cream, and it was good. I got a soft-serve ice cream flavored with cookie butter (never seen that before!!!), and it was good. M got a pretty standard chocolate ice cream, and that was also good. And J, amongst other things, got a "Northern Lights Sherbet", which was apparently sour apple, blue raspberry, and grape flavored all at once???
Sephiroth. I can tell you from personal experience today that if someone offers you a "Northern Lights Sherbet", it is a TRAP. It tasted as confused, scatterbrained, and incoherent as a poor-quality children's cartoon - if this flavor was a plot, then it was ALL over the place, like its writer could not maintain an attention span for more than 5 consecutive seconds. If the phrase "what the fuck" was a flavor, this would be it.
But apparently, some people like it enough that it's viable to keep its place on the menu???? I can't make pretend like I understand. But I can respect it if other people like it. It's just not for me. I'll count on the people who like it to save me from it if someone decides to torture me by foisting it upon me.
Hey, Sephiroth? I know I've asked you about ice cream flavors you might like. But are there any ice cream flavors that you hate? I'm curious…
Anyhoot. It's getting pretty late, so I think I'll stop writing now and go to bed.
I love you. Please take nice care of yourself, okay? And stay safe out there, too. I'll write again soon…
Your friend, Lumine
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justabeewithapen · 6 months
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:0 if you have ideas for a maskless hero drawing then i want to see it! but if not then what would the others reactions be if they see him without the mask(considering TLQ didnt know that it was a mask i think the others would have the same idea except for contrarian)?
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I AM SO SORRY THIS TOOK SO LONG!! I had these grand visions of drawing all of them, then that task was so daunting I kept pushing this back. I didn't draw everyone, but I did draw the most important one. Firstly, the list of people who knew Hero's helmet wasn't his face: Smitten - While a peaceful creature himself (unless righteous justice is needed) Smitten has seen the after-math of other employees from less kindly monsters. His first and only concern when seeing Hero was fixing that man's horrible haircut. No one knows how he learned to cut hair considering his head is a skull, but I don't think anyone is brave enough to ask. Cold - One of the less peaceful monsters, he's blown a few heads off employees before and has picked up on helmets because of how they shatter. He thinks they're more like some sort of artificial shell employees wear for protection like they do the nutcracker body, and they're not far off! Cold would mock Hero for willingly leaving his protective casing and then would be tackled by TLQ as he loads his shotgun Contrarian - Being a masked they obviously know how people work. If he ran into Hero without his helmet he wouldn't be too different. Assuming Hero lets them, they would be far more touchy-feely and grabby, and more of that 'blood' substance might leak from their face on instinct. They wouldn't convert him, but it would be more obvious the urge is there. Skeptic - While he can't see he has pieced together from the way Hero talks that he wears something over his face. Skeptic envisions it more like a carapace situation like bugs, physically apart of Hero and hiding the squishy undersides. If Hero allowed (he would but he would be very anxious) I think Skeptic would want to sniff and feel Hero's face with his own to get an idea of it. He would also probably suggest Hero get his hair preened by Cheated because he is very good at it. Stubborn - Stubborn has eaten a lot more employees than Hero would be comfortable knowing about. It doesn't make any difference to Stubborn, but he would make fun of Hero's "baby face" because he doesn't have any scars. Secondly, people who did not know the helmet came off: Broken - Broken is always very touchy-feely when interacting with Hero. Because his acid is so light Hero's suit is perfectly capable of resisting it for pretty long periods of time. The same does not apply to skin however. Broken would probably try and climb up Hero like it normally does, only to be startled out when Hero freaks out because their goop burns on skin. They would """"run"""" off to mope until Hero finds them to promise there aren't any hard feelings. Cheated - Like Stubborn he immediately comments on Hero's lack of scars. While startled to find out the helmet wasn't Hero's face, Cheated is pretty quick to accept that fact and move on. He would offer to preen Hero's hair and would actually be more comfortable around Hero. Having a face to read emotions off of makes him more comfortable, even though Hero normally has a very expressive voice. Hunted - Hunted already has fairly bad eyesight, so the only thing this changes for him is that it is slightly easier to separate Hero's head from the background of facilities. Normally Hunted stares at Hero's chest when they talk because his bright green suit is a good spot to focus on. The thought Hero also has an exoskeleton is easy to understand, but Hunted would be freaked out at the idea Hero is putting back on his old 'molts' instead of moving to new ones!! Do you want to be less protected squishy friend???? Opportunist - Similar to Hunted it is not hard for him to accept that Hero has an exoskeleton. He is less caught up on the removable aspect, but he is suddenly very interested in the helmet itself. There is no way he didn't try and steal it at least once... or twice. Paranoid - Very much freaked out and bothered that the helmet isn't his face. The first time Hero takes it off Paranoid has a breakdown trying to figure out why Hero is
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