#I didn't screenshot anything for my own sanity

[blubun0309]

(TW: disscusion of tc*st/s*x implied in tags I'm literally so sorry 😭)

I used to think the internet was safe. I had heard stories, but nothing had happened to me and I thought I was safe...

So I just ran into 2 Leo and Donnie ship accounts on X previously Twitter and I want to die 😭😭😭

[khunyuki]

"I've lived my life with blade and you always in my mind"

ʀᴇqᴜᴇꜱᴛ: 𝚈𝚘𝚞 𝚠𝚊𝚗𝚝 𝚝𝚘 𝚋𝚎 𝚖𝚢 𝚠𝚒𝚏𝚎 𝚝𝚑𝚊𝚝 𝚋𝚊𝚍𝚕𝚢?

Synopsis: Kafka was so used to calling Kagami as Platoon Leader Hoshina that he was confused when she ran away after mentioning that in front of his Vice Captain. Part 2 of this post.

Pairing/s: Hoshina Soshiro x Fiancee!OC

Note/s: I was undecided if I should choose detailed or not but for now i'm writing it in the way I knew how to write. Shorter but better i guess hahahah

Warning/s: Minors below 18+ is NOT ALLOWED

Genre: NSFW

Masterlist: TOC

↓↓↓ PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK AS THIS CONTAINS EXPLICIT CONTENT ↓↓↓

"My wife, why are you hiding here all by yourself?"

As if her body took a screenshot, Kagami was so startled by the sudden voice whispering in her ears that she jumped and lost her balance only to bump into the person she's hiding from.

"S-Soshiro! H-how did you get here?! Since when??"

Kagami wanted to run away but the sheer strength of his grip overpowers her easily. She didn't know how he got behind her undetected or how he found her but she knew... She's already screwed...

"I-i'm not hiding I swear! I just have work to do!"

Kagami made an excuse with whatever comes to her mind first. Her brain already in a mush despite him not doing anything and just holding her in his arms. Her face turning red by the second as she remember her crimes.

"Is that so~ I wonder what kind of work does Platoon Leader Hoshina have to do in the storage room?"

Hoshina Soshiro licked his lips as his fiancee gulped at having been caught. He lifted her body to sit her down on the empty table, then pressing close enough between her legs to meet her private parts with his own. Her legs unconsciously wrapping around his hips and her arms on his neck.

"That's... Ummm... Well..."

Kagami couldn't move nor could she think. Especially when he was grinding his hips in a sensual way, making her aroused while he's just looking at her with his usual foxy face like he isn't doing anything to her at all.

"Tell me... Do you really want to take my last name that badly, my dear wife?"

Soshiro took his left hand from her hips to the base of her cheeks and jaw, cupping and supporting it. His thumb rubbing her plump lips, playing with it. He urged her to open her mouth and made her suck on it. He couldn't help but bit his own lips in delight as she easily gave him access to her mouth, her tongue playing with it as she sucked it like a baby. He could feel her sanity leaving out of her body as he removed his hand away from her face.

"Yes. I do"

As if possessed, Kagami gave her answer as if she's out of breath. Staring at him with those bedroom eyes full of need, she pulled him down so their lips could meet with each other.

.

.

.

.

↓↓↓ PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK AS THIS CONTAINS EXPLICIT CONTENT ↓↓↓

↓↓↓ PLEASE READ AT YOUR OWN RISK AS THIS CONTAINS EXPLICIT CONTENT ↓↓↓

.

.

.

.

Soshiro ripped her tights and moved her panties aside, pushing her uniform's skirt upwards. He inserted his digits on her needy cunt while he kissed her hungrily, drowning out the moans she's letting out.

"Be quiet. You wouldn't want anyone to hear you, right?"

He whispered in her ear while pumping in and out of her. His free right hand brushing her hair back, moving her braids to the back. She placed her hands on her mouth in an attempt to drown out her moans.

"Remove your buttons but don't take your clothes off"

She did as she was told, undoing the buttons of her uniform clumsily. The standard formal uniform for women is made like a dress with a belt so despite what she's doing, the uniform still clings to her with only her chest exposed. He licked his lips at the show.

"That's right. Good girl"

He removed his right hand from her head to slipped it inside her bra. Cupping her left breast and squeezing it in the confines of restrictive clothing. He pushed it upwards while he played with her erect nipples and bit her neck.

"Soshi--"

His actions left her breathless that she almost forgot to keep quiet. Just the mere thought of doing such vulgar act at work made her wet and tight, even more so if someone hears her loud noises during it.

"Shhhh~"

The soft shushing he let out brought shivers down her spine, making her bite her bottom lip in ecstasy. Never in her life did she thought of something like this happening to her yet it gives her with so much delight because she's doing it with her lover.

She was close, so so close with the way her pussy became even tighter and how her silent moans became more erratic. Then he stopped all of his work, removing his fingers from her cunt and breast making her feel so empty and whine as he interrupted her high.

"Tell me what do you want me to do?"

He knew just how much she wants him but he can't let her get what she wants so easily. Even if she stares at him with those eyes, begging him to make her cum and put it inside.

"I-"

She knew he was teasing her with that twisted smile on his face. He wants her to beg him but she's too embarrassed to do so. She couldn't even close her legs and squirm as he's standing in between them.

"What does my dearest wife want me to do?"

He asked her as he removed his own member from its own confines, stroking it with his hands then slapping it against her pussy. She tried so hard to contain her moans but the way he rubs it upside down her folds, pressing on her hole yet not entering it fully, she was going crazy.

"Please! Put it in plea-Ahhh"

She begged him in a whisper shout as she couldn't handle it any longer. He didn't even let her finish before he pushed himself all the way inside producing a smack of their skins meeting each other. He was pounding on her so roughly and fast, she couldn't even produce a sound as her mouth hangs open.

"Who am I?"

He asked her, not once stopping his fast pace. His hands now on her bottom bringing her closer to him as their hips met.

"Soshiro~"

She could only call his name in response at the pure ecstasy she's feeling.

"Not that, the other one"

This confused Kagami as she suddenly looked at him for clarification. Only the smile on his face was his answer. Then she thought back to what he keeps on calling her the entire time, not that she could thinking properly with him rearranging her guts at the moment.

"H-husband?"

She guessed having recalled him calling her wife over and over again, and how she got into this situation in the first place.

"That's right"

His pace became even rougher, constantly hitting her g-spot as reward for her correct answer.

"My husband~"

"My wife~"

They called out to each other with their newfound endearments feeling even more vigorous as they feel their climaxes coming. He could feel his member getting harder at her every mention.

"I'm the only one who can make you and see you like this hmm"

"Yes! You're the only one!"

They momentarily forgot to be silent as they released at the same time. As always, he rode her still releasing all of his semen inside her womb then finally removes it with a satisfying pop. They pant heavily at the sudden workout as they he held her in his arms.

"How about a second round?"

He gave her an expecting grin before he got slapped on the shoulder.

"We're still at work..."

Not as exhausted as before, the fog on her mind instantly cleared as soon as she came, remembering where they are.

"Hmmm... What a shame. I wanted to show you more how this husband of yours will treat you"

He helped her stand up, fixing her bra and buttoning her uniform. He purposely didn't wipe up their juices but instead pushed something inside instead, earning a gasp from her. The liquid dripping on her ruined panties was forcefully pushed back by an object.

"What did you do??"

Confused, Kagami wanted to know what he did. Sure she trusts him but this was the first time he's done something weird to her like this.

"You can't remove it"

She could feel that thing vibrating inside making her really uncomfortable. She's also so full yet this object was shaking on her insides. She once again looked at his face to ask if he's sure about this but was only greeted by a smirk.

"If you make it until you get home then I'll give you a reward"

<- Table of Contents

[lord-westley]

Shattered Hearts

Pairings: Kili x Reader, Ori x Reader, Dwalin x Reader, Nori x Reader, Fili x Reader

Warnings: Angst, suffering, heartbreak, depression, blood(dwalin), (drinking, death,(Nori)) unedited and crappy lmao

A/N: I can barely bring myself to write these days. But I stumbled upon old screenshots from my Tolkien discord server. Been crying none stop from missing these memories so uh... here you go @erosofthepen @midearthwritings @messiambrandybuck @wishingtobeinadifferentuniverse and ofc Hart who has since left tumblr... love you guys

It was sharp and painful; like a dagger straight through his Heart. Days felt dragged on, as if the sun was mocking him- forcing him to remember how you once shined as bright as the sun.

Despite the suns heat on his skin, Kili's shattered heart felt as ice cold as ever. Like a stormy, winter night seeping through the cracks, threatening to cave in his sanity.

Every day was the same; wake up with your side empty, eating breakfast by himself, training by himself.

Kili felt old and slow. His head has been so foggy these last two years without you. Mother is scared, Uncle is worried and Fili... hasnt been seen in weeks.

He can't go back. He refuses to enter Erebor again... how could he? There's nothing left of his heart, so what's the point?

Fili lost everything that day. There was nothing he could have done except watch. Watch you writhe in pain, crying and begging for it to stop.

All he could do was hold you tight, his own tears painting his cheeks as you slowly and painfully passed.

How did it end up like this? Everything was perfect. Erebor was taken back, his family was back together, and the love of his life was by his side. The constant laughter in the halls were gone, nothing left but silence and whispers about the dwarf prince.

No, he can't go back... he'll continue down this gravel path, planting his shattered heart within the forests you loved so much.

Blood. Everyday he comes home from the wilds, covered in new injuries and blood. Each time, carrying a new baby animal.

He hopes that, if he saved them- perhaps he could save you. Perhaps the Valar would stop the punishment if he fixed his past wrongs.

A punishment. That's how he views it. They took you away from him because of his rough past. You're alive. You have to be alive. And he'll do whatever it takes to bring you back home.

His heart is shattered, but by mahal, he'll do what it takes to bring you back even if it means laying down his life.

He's gone...

When the love of his life was ripped away from him, he took to drinking. Hoping that perhaps, If he disappeared, he'd see you again.

It didn't take long...

A week, a week of drinking everyday, multiple ales in one sitting. A week is all it took for his body to give up.

He was unrecognizable...

His hair unkempt and tangled, beads holding on for dear life has his hair thinned from health issues. Clothes stained with ale and spit, clinging to his skin as he sweated.

There was no hope...

No hope for him, no hope for you. There was nothing left for him. He was alone. Alone with his shattered heart till his last breath.

The day you disappeared, was the day you took his entire being with you.

He didn't cry. He didn't yell and throw things. He... did nothing but stare.

There was nothing left of him. A mere shell of a once sweet dwarf.

Ori couldn't bring himself to eat, sleep or anything to keep him alive. He never moved from his armchair except for a twitch. A twitch as though he was listening to an angelic voice.

But there were no voices...

Just him... alone with a shattered heart, and voices in his head.

[call-me-copycat]

The Weight of Regret

So... It seems I can't save requests to drafts without them disappearing... なぜこうなるのか…( ꐦ•᷄ὤ•᷅)و

I deeply apologize if I've never received your ask! I have many requests waiting right now, but now that I know about this I'll make sure to try my best to keep them from disappearing (_๑óωò)_

*I FORGOT TO SCREENSHOT IT!! NOO ｡°꒰ ՞ ´ ᗣ`°꒱°｡

➤ Welcome: Links to all my masterlists, rules for requests, and some info about me (⁠๑⁠¯⁠◡⁠¯⁠๑⁠)

▶ [CHARACTERS]: Dadzawa x Daughter Reader (platonic)

▶ [GENRE]: Hurt/Comfort + angst

▶ [SUMMARY]: You've always struggled with smoking, and it tears away at you until you're caught. Will you get into trouble, or will you be spared and helped?

▶ [WORD COUNT]: 6,868

▶ [WARNINGS]:

- This one is rather angsty all throughout

- Mental breakdowns

- Smoking (obviously)

- Mentions of addiction

A deep inhale. The smoke filling your lungs gave off a comforting feeling that temporarily masked the guilt that ate away at you. A heavy exhale. The remnants of your action shamelessly filling the air in a heavy cloud of smoke.

It was a tiresome night, and stress was breaking apart your mind as exams rode closer and closer to the present day. Too many things had to be done at that moment, and even more things were left undone or unfinished, waiting for you to come back and complete them. You didn't know when that time would come though.

It all seemed so heavy. You'd push yourself to complete the burdensome amount of classwork you were assigned and then will yourself to train on your quirk. You'd repeat this cycle day after day, but you never seemed to gain any benefits from doing all this. It seemed as though all your efforts were in vain. You weren't much of a suck-up, but there were still small expectations that at least someone would notice how hard you were pushing yourself. Alas, that day never came.

No one else seemed to be struggling this much. It caused your mind to wander where you didn't want it to. You began to think... Were you falling? Was there something wrong with you? Were you not cut out for the Hero Course? Troubling thoughts such as these began to slowly litter your mind. Beginning like a small weed, they festered and grew to unimaginable proportions.

They began to tear apart your sanity, and it felt as though you were having an argument with your own brain every single day. It was exhausting, and horribly painful to endure. But you didn't let anyone know. You couldn't. They'd think you were insane. Or they'd baby you, seeing you as too unstable to be a hero one day. All the work and effort you put in would all be wasted without anything to show for it.

Endure. That's all that rang about your head. All you had to do was to keep yourself moving. To endure it, that's what made a hero after all, right?

Too bad no one told you how pointless it all felt. It seemed as though you were spiralling, into an endless pit of misery that welcomed lost and pained souls into its gaping mouth. It was times like these that sparked the flame of your habit.

Twisting the white stick around your fingers, you thought back to how it started while staring into the flickering yellow flame at the end.

It was all too much that day. It was too much everyday, really, but that day in particular had hit you hard and knocked everything out of you without any preparation time. A misaligned testing schedule, a broken phone, a dropped dinner. Everything seemed to go wrong for no apparent reason. You wanted to burst into tears, but as a last resort you willed it away.

Your mind had been running a marathon, and you were exhausted beyond belief from the work your class had been put through. You had originally walked into your father's room to ask him if you could have some help on an assignment you had been struggling with, but it quickly changed.

Looking around Aizawa's room, you didn't see him anywhere in sight. You saw some of his things littered about the room, not particularly messy but in an organized chaos kind of way. Realizing he must've been busy with something or called by someone, you sighed and went to exit back to your own room not too far away. However, something caught your eye.

A white box was partially sticking out from under his work bag, and although you knew what it was you still lifted the bag to see anyways. A clean, already opened box of cigarettes met your drained and exhausted gaze. It was no secret Aizawa was a smoker, in fact a good chunk of the teachers smoked every now and then. However, unlike the others, you noticed your father never really talked about it openly. He'd answer questions briefly before moving the topic of discussion, and that was about as much as you got out of him.

Memories of him scooting you back inside the house when you were younger flashed across your eyes, as he always wanted you to be somewhere else when he was submitting to his slight addiction. It was almost like an unspoken rule, but it always infuriated you how he never outright told you anything.

You didn't have time to read in between the lines. Pushing yourself to simply get out of bed was a struggle, so that's probably why you weren't thinking clearly that night. All the tests, assignments, criticizing, and sleepless nights bursted throughout your mind, burning your thoughts on the rising anger.

You hadn't had time to think. What were you so angry about that night? You don't remember. Possibly the work without reward. Or the unspoken sayings. Or the fiery thoughts that charred your mind everyday and night. Who knows.

But what you did caused a chain. A chain that you wished never existed. Looking at the open box was tempting. But you were a good kid, right? You got good grades, you treated everyone decently, you did as you were expected. But what about you? You hadn't thought about that. And the rage filled your consciousness once again, fueling your shaky fingers to nab a single stick from the box before running out of there.

Only, you didn't know what to do when you got back to your room. You had clutched it to your chest, panting from the run. You had never even held a cigarette before, so you took the time to examine it. You didn't think it looked like much, but you heard it caused nasty effects and addiction that was overall very hard to cope with. There wasn't much you heard spoken about it, except for maybe a passing stranger on the streets.

It was seen as a taboo. To smoke was to throw yourself into being delinquent. You'd be seen as one of those bad kids that got tattoos and wore spiky clothing. Only... That's what you were taught, but seeing average people like your father, or even Nezu smoke every now and then debated that thought.

You wished you threw it away. Burned it without putting it in your mouth. Anything but smoking it.

A "cancer stick", a "coffin nail", you had heard it go by many names. It all worried you, but the thrill of doing something so wrong, of doing something just for you... It excited you for once. You didn't care that it was bad, nor did you care that you'd come to regret your actions. Life was heavy and cold, quiet and unforgiving. You needed something to pick you back up, to distract you from the swirling winds of reality that screeched outside the flames of the smoke that shielded you.

You lit it, watching the flame flicker. That was your last chance to throw it away. Too bad you listened to impulse instead. You certainly learned your lesson. Putting it to your lips was foreign, and it felt so dirty. The first inhale was the worst, leaving you in a coughing fit and a state of confusion and irritation on the lack of soothing that was supposed to come from it.

After trying again, it got easier for you. And easier. A little too easy. You sat there, enjoying the vague calmness that washed over you as the hot nicotine filled your lungs, pushing away everything that once hurt. It was refreshing, and you wanted more. You wanted a stronger escape, one where you were nothing but a floating blob in your head. Unfortunately for you, the cigarette ran down too far, the slight burn ripping you away from your temporary euphoria.

You watched the little flame burning the paper down in present day, eyes empty and brain too numb to cope properly. The memories haunted you, but in a way it had become routine. Although you knew it was bad, and although you knew the effects, you couldn't tear yourself away from it.

Addiction had long since clung to your head, taking control of your thoughts and behaviors. You soon found yourself doing things you wouldn't have before, your limbs being puppeteered by a broken mind. It spread, until there wasn't a single part of you that wasn't succumbed to this "infection", as you called it.

You never stole at least, you had already succumbed to one of the drops in life, and you certainly wouldn't let yourself fall even further. You couldn't. Knowing the look in your father's eyes if he were to find out... It was haunting. But it was the only form of restraint that kept you sane in a way.

You worked small jobs when you could, such as helping yardwork or cleaning. Being a student left no time for a side job, and even if it did you knew you definitely wouldn't have enough energy for one. So you had to make do with what you had.

You'd always buy from smaller stores, or ones that were in lower quality, trying to diminish the risk that they'd ask for your age. You only got asked once, but you panicked and said you were buying it for a family member. You never went back, but of course you were still new to the way things were at that time.

It'd long since grown into something that seemed ever so permanent, and you were only counting down the days until you knew you wouldn't be able to go a day without a huff.

A soul contaminated and controlled far too young by a never-ending, all-controlling force that seemed so powerless at the time. You couldn't brush the disgust from your mind each time you reached into the box. It was an obsession you couldn't bear to be a part of any longer.

That one event led to others, creating an even worse cycle for you to be a part of. The chain of events leading all throughout your life until it reached to where you were now.

Looking at the pale paper tube lit aflame in your hands, the memories only served to cause more self-loathing and repulsiveness. Sighing, you brought it back to your mouth once more.

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

The morning after was one that mirrored every other awakening that had happened before it. You threw on your uniform, ate a quick breakfast, and went off to UA with your father.

As you walked through the halls in the early morning, thoughts of the previous night's memories flashed through your mind once more. Peeking over at Aizawa from the side of your eye, you wondered if he could possibly have known how to erase this addiction. With all his added years of experience with things of all sorts, he always had an answer to everything you asked of him. But this was different.

Lately you had been thinking of different ways on how you could force yourself to quit. The constant fear of discovery and disappointment continually unraveled your tattered mind, making it only so much worse to suffer at the hands of your own mind.

Too lost in thought, your attention was torn away from the delicate and intricate rays of sunlight shining through the tall glass windows of UA, coating the world in a filter of pink and orange as the sun began to wake up with its people of Japan. The wind swayed the leaves of the trees, causing a small flock of birds to rise up into flight. The world still spun around you in its elegant symphony of everyday life, and it would've calmed you if you had bothered to look up.

You stayed looking at the ground.

The day went by as normal as possible, a reminder of the continued cycle that constantly swallowed you without decision. General classes, lunch, more general classes, hero training, home. It was all the same, with only a few diminutive details that made that day slightly different from the others, just as they always do.

Except, to your annoyance you got hit with a craving right at the end of the day. It wasn't uncommon as the cravings had a habit of hitting you at random times, and if anything you considered yourself lucky since it happened to be the end of the day. Nothing a quick break out at the back of the school couldn't fix.

The back of the school was mainly empty everytime you saw it, and it was a sort of unspoken unwind-place for people to relax when they struggled being under the constant pressure of the expectations of perfection that came with being a part of UA. It was also the only spot without cameras as well, and there was only a miniscule risk of someone walking in on you. The only people that went to the back were tired teachers or students, or Lunch Rush every now and then who empties the waste contents of his equipment into the large ground drain that sits by the only door back inside.

The ground was covered in smudges and bits of debris, most uncommon to see from the elite UA high, but in a way it added to the charm since all other areas of the school were constantly squeaky clean. The bell had rung, and your father wasn't leaving until he finished his grading and daily training with Shinso, so you had a good amount of time to get what you needed done (you hated what you had become).

Opening a hidden side pocket from your school bag and bringing out the box, you promised to yourself you'd make it quick. You lit a stick. A deep inhale. A heavy, hatred-filled exhale. You watched with weary eyes as the cloud of smoke fluttered around in the wind, growing lighter and diminishing completely from the edges in. It was peaceful in a way, seeing something so terrible eventually disappear before your very eyes like you hoped. If only you could will it away from your head.

Taking another breath in, your little moment of calm was broken away from you as the back door creaked open, causing you to sputter and cough in surprise as your heart practically ripped itself from your chest.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa! Didn't mean to catch you off guard, Pocket Rocket!" A familiar voice reassured, the familiarity failing to do anything other than cause more panic and self-loathing.

You looked up to see none other than Present Mic turning around from where he had his back turned, his work bag in one hand and the other trying not to let the back door slam.

"Just trying to escape a little early, y'know?-..."

Too late to run away. There was no time to hide your wrong-doings as you saw your father's best friend turn around and watched as his casual smile faltered as it fell upon the white stick that was currently lit and in between your fingers and your eyes that were wide open in surprise.

A million thoughts ran across your head. Disgust with the fact that you let your addiction get this bad. Rage at the world for pushing you so far. Fear of getting a disappointed look and an even more heavy discussion. Too many things to focus on, much too small a window of time.

The air was thick and heavy, the awkwardness you felt in the moment ate away at your very soul bit-by-bit as you waited for the silence to be cut through somehow. To be cut loose no matter the cost was what you so desperately wished for. But he stood there, an unreadable expression on his face.

Eventually Mic sighed a bit, and even though it was small it ripped a hole like none-other across your state of mind as the weight of the situation finally bore down on you.

He took off his glasses and quietly cleaned them with a small cloth from his pocket, lengthening the stretch of painful silence further as you waited in terrible anticipation. Placing the glasses on his head rather than back across his eyes, he turned and looked at you with a tired expression, dragging his hand down his face and sighing once again.

"Geez, kid. You're really killing me here..." He muttered, loud enough for you to hear. "How long?..."

Such a simple question, just two words. Two words too much. Two words you never hoped to hear, nor to ever have to answer.

"I, um.. Awhile..." That was all you could get out, voice slightly raspy from the hot smoke that went down your throat not too long ago. The shame was unbearable to endure.

"Man... What'm I gonna do?.." Mic looked exasperated, and truth be told he was. Although he was confused and worried, you were caught off guard with how calm he was. You expected shouting, scolding, immediate action, something. The fact that he wasn't showing much made you stuck on as to worry about if he was hiding his actual anger, or if he actually didn't care that great a deal. You doubted it was the latter.

He shook his head, folding his arms and leaning back against the wall. "Your dad know ..?" He asked it with a shallow tone, almost as if it was redundant and the answer was already known. You could only meekly shake your head no in response.

"Look, I'm gonna be honest with you - 'cause I'm your uncle. I'm not going to ask any questions or anything, I just... want to know if you're doing ok?" His green eyes shone with concern, and you felt another hole being torn in your heart as guilt gnawed at you.

You didn't initially answer, opting to bring your knees up to your chest and stare at the ground as you tried to conjure an appropriate response. You breathed out of your nose as you decided that there was no point in hiding anything anymore. It was already uncovered, why bother with more layers of nonsense?

"No... Sometimes I feel ok. But, then I feel like this other times..." You vaguely gestured to your surroundings, signaling that you weren't feeling mentally well currently, causing your habit.

"Geez, I'm so sorry [name]... " His expression was heavy, but still displayed an air of lightheartedness in an odd kind of comforting way.

"Look, here's what's going to happen ok? First I want you to tell- no wait.." He cut himself off, thinking for a second before beginning again. "No, first things first; hand over the box", Mic reached out a hand in your direction, signaling to you with a quiet air of kind authority.

Your eyes widened in initial surprise, but you supposed it had to have happened at some point when you got caught. It was harder than you liked to admit, grasping the box a little tighter until you clenched your eyes shut and swiftly dropped it in his hand before your mind could further disagree and get you into more trouble.

Mic let out a little breath as he looked at the box, and once again he caught you off guard as he opened it and handed you a single cigarette.

"Here. I'm not sayin' it's ok or anything... But I know from experience that the urges are tough to handle. Just don't want to throw you straight into the pool without a little help, y'know?"

Tears welled up in your eyes as you pitifully took it from his hands, wishing you could just never have to look at it again. Sensing your disdain, he lightly sighed and patted you on your head. Your attention stayed fixated on the ground, avoiding his gaze.

"You know what you have to do next, right?"

Staying silent, you nodded.

•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•°•

Staring up into the night sky from the apartment balcony, you relished the quiet peacefulness you felt when you gazed up at the sparkling stars ahead.

The little town of Musutafu was always lit up at night. The distant sounds of cars and people's chatter filled your ears. There was a slight breeze that caused you to rub your uncovered arms despite it not being that discomforting. Windows were randomly lit up different shades of yellow or white from the surrounding buildings, and you distracted yourself by looking around to see if you could spot anyone walking around. You saw none, but you heard people all around.

You let out a heavy breath, wondering how you would be able to approach your father on the subject. You knew you had no choice, because if you didn't then Mic would definitely tell Aizawa himself, and that would make your situation worse and your reputation would go down. There was no escape and no more hiding.

At this point you'd accept any punishment that came your way - after all you were stuck at such a deep point in this hole you made that you couldn't even see a way out anymore. You'd get scolded, punished, people would think badly of you. You accepted it because what else could you do?

What hope was there really, when life pushed you to take such measures at your lowest only to punish you for falling into its trap? As much as you wanted to grow cold and bitter, you couldn't find it in yourself. You felt like a small child again, awaiting a cosmic trial that was about to be given to you by the mighty hands of the universe itself. A silly way of thinking, but at this point in your life you felt you needed it.

The breeze stilled, and the weight of the unmoving air settled on you. Looking up at the twinkling stars again, you tried to steel your mind as hard as you could so you could get the hard part over with. To have to come out all by yourself and to out yourself on a bad habit you gained from the lowest moments of your life made you feel like putty being pulled and twisted.

"Bit of a breeze out... Where's your jacket?"

You startled at the feeling of Aizawa's hand that suddenly placed itself on your shoulder without warning. You jumped a bit more than you would've under normal circumstances, much more tense than usual.

Blinking, you registered his question before answering with a feeble shrug of your shoulders, not bothering to look behind you to see where he was.

You heard the chair next to you creak before he spoke up again. "Bring your jacket next time you want to go outside. It's getting colder and I don't want you to get sick."

Sliding your eyes to the side, you glanced over at your father sitting casually in the soft chair that matched the one you were in, his hands in his pockets and his hair tied up. He was looking up at the sky just as you were, only with a more empty glaze as he scanned over it in exhaustion.

The sounds of the town didn't help the slightest in deterring the wave of stuffy silence that laid itself down over the both of you. It seemed you were the only one slightly bothered by it, which made sense since it took quite a bit to bother Aizawa.

You turned away and looked solemnly at the ground, eyes filled with the weight of all the dignity you knew were about to lose. The chilled breeze slightly numbed your fingers, it not being able to do much since the warmth of your hands clasped together kept it away.

"I heard from Ectoplasm that you were struggling with certain aspects of math, that right?"

Sighing, you clenched your hands tighter to the point where your fingernails were digging crevices into the soft skin of your palms. You weren't in the mood for small talk, especially about things you needed help on or were struggling with, so you just nodded stiffly.

He leaned back further into his chair. "I'm going to put you in Vlad's Hero Financing, that after-school program, until I see improvement."

Ah, the place where the bad or stupid kids go, you thought to yourself. There were many after school programs, but the hero financing class was (unsurprisingly) the least popular, so teachers had to send in disobedient or struggling students just to keep its attendance record up. You were sure Vlad got forcefully assigned to teach it since he never seemed to want to be there every time you saw him.

You didn't need this extra weight being thrown on top of you, only serving as an unnecessary reminder of your struggles and failures that turned you into the person you were today. It already gnawed at your skull every morning as soon as you opened your eyes and up until the last second before they closed again at night. To hear further criticism being tossed onto the already overflowing pile was only helping to force the bottle closer to bursting.

Warm tears began to fill your eyes once again as the thoughts and memories began rapidly assaulting and battering your bruised mind that had already endured so much. At that moment you felt nothing but rage. If asked, you couldn't explain what it was that you were angry at. Possibly too many things built up to pinpoint one single reason.

You were trapped and pressured, and what else could you do when you hit rock bottom besides digging deeper and letting loose? You were going to be seen in a worse light, to be met with angry and disappointed glances and glares, so why bother trying to fix a plate that was broken so far to the point where it was just dust?

What was the point of trying to push yourself further if it was all going to be blown away before your eyes? Your mind was a spinning cycle of pain and color, memories of both hatred and loathing helping to boost the deep-seated rage that burned the edges of your thoughts with red fury. You couldn't see clearly, couldn't think clearly, not a single logical thought breaching contact to help restrain the broken reigns that tore after giving their all for much too long.

"Because that's all I am to you, right? A bad kid? One that can't even comprehend something everyone else can?"

You spat with a venom that wasn't intended, the fiery rage burning your logic to ash. Looking over, you saw Aizawa turn your way in his chair, eyes scrunched in either worry or irritation, now on full alert at your angered outburst.

"Now look, I never said anything about your behavior, but since we're on the topic I think you could certainly use an adjustment-"

"Let me guess, it's once again good enough for you? Not happy with me again?" You interrupted, heart racing in your chest as you finally spoke without a forced filter. You were in the moment, and the adrenaline rush felt exhilarating. "Because too bad! I guess I'll never be the perfect student or daughter you want! You raised a delinquent, a failure! "

It was too much. You clawed at your face, eyes squeezed shut and jaw clenched tight as laborious breaths rushed out of you. The fear of being seen as a bad kid because of your habit ate away at you ever since that first smoke years ago.

Too overwhelmingly angry to think of anything further, you barely registered the gentle hands that urged your grip to loosen. Despite being detached from your surrounding environment, you still felt the soft pads of fingers wiping under your eyes and down your cheeks, and to your surprise you came to the realization that you had started crying at some point.

Trembling, you tried pushing away from your father's touch, still loopy on the rath you felt. Refusing to look up at him and avoiding his reaching hands, you hastily dug around your pocket, only for Aizawa to successfully grip onto your shaking hands and bring them into his comforting hold. He tenderly rubbed his thumbs over the soft skin on your hands, before letting one hand go to try to bring and bring your face to look at him.

"[Name]..." He breathed heavily out of his nose upon your blatant refusal to look at him once more despite his efforts. "Sweetie, what's going on? Talk to me, please."

The hurt tone in his voice caused another sting of guilt to burn its way into your heart. The concern, patience, and worry all made it so much harder to open up what needed to be let out.

You clutched his hand tighter in yours, earning an affectionate squeeze in response from your father before you pulled your hands out of his grip. Confused, Aizawa went to reach for you again, only to pause as he felt an unknown object in his hand that wasn't there before.

Opening his hand, he was met with a single, lightly crinkled cigarette sitting on the center of his palm, and his heart dropped upon the realization. This was a silent confession.

The silence was deafening, pounding into your eardrums with a heavy weight. Your heart was hammering so rapidly it caused concern as to whether or not it'd burst itself right out of your skin. In a way, you would've preferred that to sitting in that insufferable silence any day of the week.

Aizawa could only look at the object in his hand, cold and still. Memories of his own childhood and addiction haunted him everyday, but it had gotten to the point where he learned how to numb it out. So to see you, his one and only daughter, suffering from the same fate he had dealt with as a teen... It frightened him to an abysmal extent.

He felt in that moment that he had failed you as a father. After all, one wouldn't smoke without reason, and that reason normally wasn't something good. He knew you were pushing yourself, but that was something he had grown to expect. To be the daughter of Shota Aizawa meant that some burdens and expectations had to be carried, that was a fact. He never knew it'd get taken that far, though.

Oh, how he cursed himself. He cursed himself as much as he could mentally. Aizawa couldn't stand the thought of you hurting, of you struggling alone and in silence. He was your father, for goodness sake! And wasn't a father's job to care for their children, to keep them safe and happy? To be a shoulder for them to cry on? And yet, here he was, doing none of that, and his dear daughter suffering right in front of his eyes.

He looked up, only to see you staring at the ground, face hidden and hands clamped shut. There was no doubt in his head you were clenching your jaw as well.

Quietly, tenderly, Aizawa pushed your head up to face him, and this time you didn't object. Upon meeting eyes, he saw yours were watery and red, and you could only look at him, feeling pathetic as you let out a sniffle.

You were only able to wait. To wait for the disappointed speech you were given each time you messed up, to receive a harsh glare, or stern punishments.

But you received none. What caught you off guard was the gentle way Aizawa held your face in his hands, and the soft worried look that sat in his eyes. The complete opposite of what you expected.

"[Name]... Oh [Name]... " His voice resonated with remorse, as if he, in a way, felt more at fault for your bad habit than you were. You never wanted him to feel bad, you had only expected yourself to get dragged down because of this problem, and you fully accepted the thought too. So to see your father in so much pain... Stricken with grief and guilt over the habit you got yourself into... The hole already in your heart ripped further, and a heavy block of heartache settled upon you.

Choking back a sob, you were only able to get out a strangled "I'm sorry...". Aizawa shook his head no at your apology, eyes rimmed red now as well. "No, it's not your fault, kid." Gently pressing a tender kiss to your forehead in reassurance, he continued.

"... How long?" In a way, his question mirrored Mic's, although his voice held more distress, coming out in a slightly strangled manner due to his conflicting thoughts that jumped about his head.

"A few years..." You looked away, not being able to bring yourself to look at him in the eyes. You felt as though you should be completely honest in that moment, because after all lying would only bring about unnecessary complications, right?

You could see Aizawa visibly tense up a bit, obviously surprised upon receiving a solid answer so easily. He let out another sigh, continuing to look at you with a mix of bittersweet fondness and concern. Aizawa was never really an affectionate man, nor was he really one to show much emotion on the daily. But this time was different. His hands never left you, and his eyes gleamed with deep, thoughtful emotions that carried the weight of his thoughts.

"You aren't... You just-" He let out a heavy breath, struggling to get his words out. Normally he'd have an answer for everything. For some reason, at this moment his mind was failing him, possibly due to the fact that he had never expected to be visited by this day.

He opened his hand once again to take another look at the cigarette. He blankly stared at it before it evolved into a glare, angry at how both of your minds were bound to such a small, feeble item. Upset with how easily it took ahold of both of your lives, and how it preyed on the both of your vulnerable moments.

"I'm sorry... I don't want to be a bad kid... A delinquent..." Your shaky voice broke the silver of silence as you struggled to contain all the years of built up guilt and self loathing that were ready to burst from your mind, threatening to snap the reigns and break free.

Aizawa let out a soft sigh, his expression delving further from a look of anger into a more somber one.

"Don't be so hard on yourself, kid-"

His casualness and calm tone caught you by surprise, especially after you had steeled your mind in preparation for a lengthy scolding and disappointment. It seemed that wherever you went nobody gave it much thought, and although it was supposed to be relieving it gave off the opposite effect: as though no one cared.

"B-but I... I smoked! I'm no good, a delinquent, right? I-I..." Your thoughts began swallowing you, mocking you in its thick putty-like memories. The days when it was too much and you'd cry after. The anxiety that always came with the fear of getting caught. The forever fading hope that this would be over.

You weren't thinking properly, too many things you had imagined not coming true upon discovery. Your world was turned upside down, and it was a mess in your head.

You just wanted this to be over. You couldn't forgive yourself as easily as those around you had.

The flying thoughts and panicked irrationality of your mind was suddenly stalled as Aizawa abruptly placed a firm, solid hand on your shoulder - most likely to snap you out of it.

Looking up you were met with stern yet caring eyes, a swirling mixture of knowledge and pain behind the deep brown color they wore.

"I can tell you regret what you did, that's why I'm telling you to not be so hard on yourself. It'll only break your self-image if you expect perfection. Look..."

He signaled for you to sit, slowly pushing you back down into the chair you once were in before dragging his chair over so it was sitting directly in front of yours. His expression became serious, his features knotting into one of deep focus and thought. Hunching over and leaning his chin against his hands you suddenly realized just how close he was. Remembering him only acting like this once or twice, it was noticed that he only became like this for serious, close moments.

The first time he had sat you down such as this was after the USJ attack. He had held you in his arms after the bandages were removed, silent and... Different.

"We all make mistakes... " Aizawa spoke slowly, suddenly seemingly aware of life around him as you noticed his glazed look was no longer there.

"... We all tend to fall down at some point in our lives... But what matters is that we get back up. Even if you know you'll fall down again." He opened his hand and dropped the cigarette plainly on the small table that sat to the side of you both.

"What matters is that you learn from where you failed. That's why we mess up, to learn. And just because you've fallen certainly doesn't make you a delinquent."

He sighed, rubbing a hand down his face. "You've made a mistake, you regret it, and you've learned your lesson. That's doesn't make you a bad kid, that makes you human."

You started tearing up, the weight of his words finally managing to sink in. Human. You were only human after all... Weren't you?

"Besides... It's not like you've committed some deadly crime. I was standing in your spot myself when I was your age, only..." He looked away and towards the stars littering the sky. "I didn't have anyone to go to. And look where that's got me" Letting out a humorless dry chuckle, he took a deep breath before letting some silence fall in between the two of you.

"I... I want this to end. I want it to all be over..." Voice meek and raw from all the crying, you didn't even know if you were speaking to Aizawa directly or if you were just letting thoughts fall out of your mind without restraint.

"Is that really what you want to do?" Years of teaching had given Aizawa a large handful of experiences, allowing him to meet students of all types who each suffered from something of their own. Of course he had known many who had fallen for this addiction, smoking without care. There were only a few, however, that actually wanted to drop it. "I'd be more than happy to guide you through it... I know it's redundant seeing as I'm still hooked myself, but I know I'm not ready yet..."

He looked up at you, surprised to see you looking right at him instead of the ground. "I've helped more than a few folks quit their habits, so I know a few things... If you want my help that is-"

Accidentally cutting Aizawa off by throwing yourself at him, you wrapped your arms around him in a tight hug of affection and regrown hope. He only chuckled, not the slightest upset, before hugging you back and patting you on the back a few times.

He had on the first soft smile of the night. "You sure you can handle it?" His voice was filled with concern, worried for how you'd handle the dark claws of addiction gnawing at you. He knew it was tough, because just as he said he himself had been in your very spot years before. He failed, but at least he knew he was content with where he stood.

"It's a difficult thing to give up, but if you really have your heart set on it, then I believe you. I'll help you through it as long as you're willing. And if you ever feel like giving up..." He paused for a second to get up and head back inside, helping to hoist you up as well.

After the back door to the balcony was open, he turned and smiled with a lighthearted wink.

"... Just remember why you wanted to quit in the first place."

A/N:

Again, I'm so sorry about the disappearance! I do hope this reaches out to the person that requested it... =͟͟͞͞(๑º ﾛ º๑)！！

Notes:

• Tags are okay with me! Just ask if you'd like to be tagged for something specific (like a specific genre, character, etc. Especially if you want to be tagged for either my art or my writing!). Once you do then I'll do my best to tag you appropriately! ✌️(˶｀‪‎‎ࠔ´˵)🙏( •∀< )👍

° Requests are open! Request rules are in my pinned post (I'm not that strict)! You can request and I'll do my best to write it, I just might take some time to do so. I promise I haven't deleted or forgotten anyone! (๑•̀ㅂ•́)و✧

♡That's all I have to say, other than that I hope everyone here has a lovely day/night! ( ⑉¯ ꇴ ¯⑉ )

[submissive-humiliation-slut]

The Exquisite Torment of Waiting...

What if I asked to use your computer to catch up on some work emails? And then used it to log into my tumblr to feed my obsession with needing to edge to degrading porn... But then forgot to log out as you walked in on me.

What if you later saw everything I had on my tumblr? My blog. My likes. My posts. My drafts.... everything. What if you took screenshots of all the degrading porn I wrote and then waited until were were all together at the dinner table before sending me one screenshot via an anonymous email under the moniker of iknow@gmail? No demand. No follow up. Just the screenshot!

Would you get off just quietly watching the colour drain from my face? Would you feel aroused as I excuse myself to rush to the bathroom and eventually come back with teary, red eyes? Would you ask me if I was alright? Would you delight in how breathless and afraid I would sound?

What if you didn't send me anything at all? What if you just left me to sweat and squirm and fear and loathe myself in every possible way with absolutely no contact? I would not know if you had sent this to someone I know? To everyone I know? I would not know what you might want... or even if you will give me a chance to beg you not to ruin my life. Would I write back to the email address and beg and plead? Or would I hope that you would go away?

What if a week passed? Two weeks? Would I become bold enough to think that I got away? Would the fear in the pit of my stomach turn into arousal that I would edge to? A month. Two months. Would I eventually forget about it? What if you sent me another screenshot six months later - this time asking me to come to a secluded address? What choice would I have? I would go there.

But then what if you didn't come there at all? You just let me wait... in fear, shame, anger, disgust and undeniable arousal... you just let me wait in my own cesspool of lust. What if you didn't show up at all? How long would I wait? At what stage would I leave? And then what if you did not send me any more communication for another few months? And would I go home and edge myself to the utter humiliation of being treated like this?

Ten months have passed and I am on edge. Confused, afraid, angry, ashamed... constantly worrying about what might become of me. That existential fear has translated to daily edging to keep my sanity. And I am distracted. Afraid. And continually ashamed. And then one night when we are all at your place for dinner - and I am helping bring food from the kitchen to the table, you lean into me and bring your lips right to my ear - inhaling my scent - you whisper, "I know..."

Then you walk away joining everyone at the dining table leaving me shaking, even more confused, angry, embarrassed, ashamed... Through the fog of all of this all I can think of is what will happen to me and why have you waited so long to tell me...

Fuckkkkkkkkkk... the very thought of that fear is making me literally moan.

[sheep-sorbet]

crawling out of the woodwork, covered in dust hewwo

sorry to anyone who has wondered where i've been, if that's been anyone at all

i fell out of making art for kingdom hearts, and i was tempted to make this huge post with receipts to explain why, but instead i think it will be easier to just say this: fandom zines suck, and a mod that ran the ienzo/zexion zine i was in harassed me into basically just giving up and not making any art of him or posting about him.

the experience i had in that zine was bad enough that i had to make this decision: from now on, i will not participate in fandom zines run by other people. i love making and helping with zines so this really upsets me, and i hope to get back into the zine scene soon. maybe self-published is the way to go for me, im not sure. i am not even sure i can return to the zine scene at all because the deadline stress is too much for me, personally.

i've also become hesitant to participate in fandom events at all anymore. the exception has been the TWEWY secret santa that's happened the last 2 decembers, and that's because i am comfortable enough with the mod and people involved that i know im not going to be like. Harassed. lol

i lost my drive to create KH stuff at all because interacting with it, and especially making stuff about ienzo, who is my favorite, would have opened me up to furthered harassment, and i just didn't want to deal with it. due to the nature of working on the zine and being sent a copy of it, it's very possible the person who harassed me could make a lot of trouble for me if i say anything at all, which is why i just Haven't until now. they have my name and previous address, which i gave to them before the harassment started. i was required to give it to them to be compensated even slightly for my work. so this being potentially used against me, for what amounts to expressing my own opinions on my own blog, made me hesitant to say anything or involve myself further in the fandom.

all i did was say the very normal and lukewarm opinion of "it makes me uncomfortable when people want to see someone fuck their adoptive parent figures, and i don't want people like that following me", and said mod ended up DMing me to chastise me about it. im not going to name that mod or share the screenshots openly, because that would be taken by them as 'harassment', ironically, and i just would like to move on.

that, combined with a lot of things going on IRL, has made posting difficult for me. tbh, i've barely drawn anything since june of last year. Thank u to everyone who has still enjoyed my art that is already up, and to all the other ienzo/zexion enjoyers who like my art and are understanding. i miss kh and i hope i'll find the drive to be into it again soon. until then, the main things i've been into lately have been (N)TWEWY, omori, and hunter x hunter, so you might see stuff about that if and when i ever get my shit set back up.

i debated just not posting this and acting like it didn't happen. but not saying anything at all would be dishonest, and more importantly, i think people should be aware of the fact that fandom zines are not always a fun experience, and can actually be very stressful and exhausting for very little reward. i want to caution people before joining fandom events to vet the people running it a little bit if possible. you can't control who gets accepted to the zine, but you can control the people whose zines you sign up for. and if it sucks hit the bricks, which i did not do and should have lol

sometimes, you join a zine and put a lot of love and work into it, all you get out of it is being overworked and harassed. and then not all the finished pieces you made for the zine even ends up in it 🙃 did i mention you have to pay to get copies of the merch you yourself designed?

for the sake of my own sanity and to avoid certain people's ire im not gonna tag this in the main tags, and im also going to turn reblogs off. this is just an informational post about where i've been, what's been happening with me, and why it's hard for me to make stuff about ienzo right now. please just take it as such and don't be mean to anyone, regardless of what happened. if anyone is really burning for details i might be open to answering in DMs, but more than anything, i just want to get this out of my system (˚ ; - ; )👍

i hope i can go back to being the "funny ienzo guy" soon. until then i will continue to be the "funny emo boys in general" guy

[madchild-dennis]

So, I'm going to start this with the fact that I know it's going to look like an obsession. However those who know, KNOW, this is NOT me and I have moved on. I barely even utter his name, whether it's the mean name I gave him or his real one. I have MOVED ON, currently texting the NEW option.

Now let's go into 1st what I did, then what God did.

So valentines day I posted this:

Actually before that I was on a sort of desperation for a husband. It was out of frustration with my parent's FUCKERY. I was SERIOUS. Once a guy with the ability to help, liked me and helped me and I saw a future, I would have started with him. BUT NO ONE CAME.

So then I got a lawyer myself, instead of with a guy's help, and was back to my old NOT DESPERATE FOR A MAN self. Caring less about anyone specific. Even a crush I had from someone I worked with that I still remembered. The last time I was that desperate I was in grade 8/9 praying and crying for a boyfriend.

Anyway, I was living my life to then see the same account I had a conversation with on Sept 4 2021 about the fucking man-child in question followed my instagram account on my birthday. I made these post about it:

So I thought she'd get over it and unfollow or I just ignore it. However God said NO. Then I posted this:

PLEASE REMEMBER THE ACCOUNT I TOLD YOU FOLLOWED MY TUMBLR.

Funny story. After I posted this Saturday early morning. God woke me like 4 am to post it:

They unfollowed:

Then the Saturday night I saw this:

Anyway, those following often KNOW I am focused on how FREE I feel as that boy choose the path he kept choosing publicly and my posts about OTHER people. Mainly on whoever the potential future bae will be, reminiscing on an ex and my 4 beauties:

So I have been focused on my new life. a Moved on life.

In fact right before I got the information that is the reason behind this post, I was moving on. I gave me a number to a guy I am currently texting. Technically he's difficult. But I was excited about that journey even if it leads nowhere.

I mean I post it EXCITEDLY post it READY.

To then hear the person come with same bullshit GOD is back with. This time showing me that HE can do whatever without me.

What I am talking about?

In this, I said I know Ms. Samantha's Grandmother (or such) Obeah me and that she tied him:

How I came to that was a spiritual thing God revealed to me over time the Obeah attempts. The knowledge of her tying him, came straight to me last week Friday when the owner of the Nursing home brought me back to the nursing home from her house (hiding us from the Ministry Of Health). Someone was saying loudly that she know someone got TIED, very loudly to someone else as I pass.

God to me right as I heard it: THAT Me to God: What, Raheem got tied. God: YES Me: 😂 him damn lucky.

I left it be because he made his bed and so he has to lie in it. Hence, the post on Saturday morning. Then I refocus back on my life. (I have to mention that, from about Saturday night God has been waking me up to tell me that the guy loves me, but that's not new and I do NOT CARE. He can't be wanting others in the day and crying for me at night and I am to CARE about that shit at ANY POINT.)

Anyways, I did NOT KNOW is God already had the tying dealt with by the same person who I overheard talking about they know someone got tied.

Do you know what that person told me yesterday?

That on that same Friday, before I arrived and heard the tied attempt, she told me that she was lead by the Holy Spirit and started to speak in tongues. Directing her, who in a similar relational problem as me, to release someone who is TIED. She wasn't sure who. Then after she finished speaking in tongues and breaking the demonic bonds being made. She told me a name came to her.

She said the person the Holy Spirit led her to say is doing it is SAMANTHA.

She said she asked others if they know of a Samantha and didn't mentioned or asked me about it until yesterday. And I did not tell her that name until yesterday, after she said the name.

You don't even KNOOOOOOOOOOOOOWWWW how broken I was when I heard. Not because she did whatever, but because God wont FUCKING LET UP. The fucking dude made his bed, he chose his path. Even if she is the reason. I warned him and I am sure so many others. NO.

HIS FATHER AND MOTHER WARNED HIM FOR YEARS.

Because of his and his mother stubborn personality and he was raised hella spoilt. He has to have shit his way, comfortable and EASY. So, he chose his FUCKING PATH AND HE MADE HIS FUCKING BED, so he LAY IN THAT SHIT.

Now God using someone else to break him out of it and I know God is NOT going to leave it there.

I am FUCKING TIRED OF THIS SHIT.

Plus this person who told me all this told me how God uses her FOR YEARS spiritually breaking and doing strong spiritual battles. I think she was who broke the obeah attempt on my life the night I came here. Plus God keep putting a special approval on her. I ALWAYS wondered why. What God is going to use her to do in my life. So when she told me I KNEW....SIGH

I am NOT HAPPY because that weak bitch-ass could be free RIGHT NOW and he'd run right back to that bitch, just because of his bruised ego, pride or for ease.

I DO NOT FEEL SORRY FOR HIM

Nor do I care. Why should I? He's a scared little bitch that will just try some other thing to hurt me, prove some point or fill his fucking pride.

I have HAD ENOUGH OF HIM AND ALL OF THIS with him and HIS MOTHER. I am FUCKING TIRED OF HIS SHIT!!!!

You don't even know how much I cried last night.

[k0ra-kumori]

Killer Frost, Caitlin Snow (DC Super Hero Girls 2019)

#PolarDemons

It was an ordinary day at the Metropolis school, I was getting ready to go to class, and maybe my mind was still a little tormented by what happened to Casey Krinsky, I was thinking about it too much in the last few days, and I don't know why , maybe it was because every time I met her at school I felt a sense of guilt and wanted to apologize to her? No ... I already tried that, and it didn't work.

- Zee! Are you okay? You're already standing there for about 5 minutes! Let's be late, and mr.Chapin promise that if we were late again he would kick us out! (Babs)

- Sorry Babs, I'm coming after you.

I was startled when Barbara called me, but I needed to get out of that trance, maybe the class distracted me a little about Casey.

(Time Skip)

It was time to go, and studying only made my mind worse, I needed a break, Mr. Chapin was unbearable today.

"Where are my friends?" I thought, we usually all leave the class together, I went looking for them and while I was walking down the main hall I saw a crowd, and my friends were there too! I went to them as soon as possible.

- Girls! What are you doing? I looked for you everywhere.

- Hey, duh! We told you in the class that we were going to come here, but it looks like you were too distracted to pay attention to us. (Kara)

- i-I'm sorry is that I ... What are you looking at?

- The new girl, her name is Caitlin Snow, she makes magnificent ice sculptures, it looks like she was transferred

from the old school because her parents moved to metropolis.(Karen)

- I heard she was the most popular girl in the school she came from, it looks like you're going to have competition Zee haha. (Kara)

Kara slaps my arm as part of the joke and I have a very weak laugh, I was happy to have another student at school, and it looks like I wouldn't be the only popular girl here now, you might think it's envy or something, but something about this girl tells me that she’s not welcome here, there’s something wrong with her ...

- Aren't you Zee zatara? I heard a lot about you. (Caitlin)

I didn't notice Caitlin approaching, I was distracted again.

- A-ah hi, yes it is me, very pleased.

I reach out to her for a friendly handshake, but she doesn't fight back ...

- My name is Caitlin Snow, you don't feel threatened by me or anything, do you (Caitlin)

- T-threatened ?! excuse me?

- It's just that I was the most popular girl in my school before I left, and you are the most popular girl here, so ... (Caitlin)

- Oh, of course, I’m very calm about it.

- If that's what you say ... (Caitlin)

Caitlin walks towards the exit of the school door, but in the middle of the way she stops in front of the photographs of all the proms that the Metropolis school has had, and by chance, I was the queen of all these proms, she looks calmly all the pictures one by one, when Caitlin then takes one of my prom queen pictures in her hand and suddenly ... she throws it in the trash.

- I was the most popular girl in my school, and believe me Zee zatara, I don't like to share anything with anyone, especially titles, and in fact, you should feel threatened by me. This school is already mine, bye bye. (Caitlin)

I couldn't believe it, she threatened me?! I didn't feel threatened by her in any way, but now ... I felt very threatened, and it wasn't because of my title.

- You saw that-- GIRLS!

- Ah it was bad zee, we were seeing the ice statue, it moves can you believe it ?! This is very cool! (Kara)

- Were you going to say something, Zee? (Jess)

- No, I don't think so. Let's go home?

(Time skip)

After a long and tiring trip home I had time to relax a little, I was thinking more clearly now.

- Caitlin Snow is not it? Let's see what you do for a living.

I search for Caitlin's name on instagram, and luckily I found her profile, she was in first place in searches.

- but what is so impressive about you ...

I keep looking for something suspicious in Caitlin's profile, I know you think I'm jealous, but believe me, it's not jealous, I'm suspicious of this girl. Well, I look around for a while and I can't find anything, all I found out was that Caitlin makes a video of make-up, ice sculptures, and that her family has their own business, she and her mother give presentations on magical ice sculptures. and skating in a theater ... familiar isn't it? Maybe I would even be jealous of her? After all, she was beautiful, intelligent and had her own business. I was already accepting that I was getting jealous of the girl with white hair, when I decide to click on any video on her Instagram just to end it all, the video was starting, Caitlin talked about makeup, how to make a perfect contour and these things, I watched the video for about 2 minutes, until something caught my attention... I realized that every time the mirror appeared, the image would lock up, looking like those films from the 1950s, you know? I thought it was strange, but I didn't want to watch the rest of the video with the image of a film from my father's time! so I used my magic to make the video stop locking... it was a mistake, because as soon as I cast the spell on the video, I looked in the mirror, and believe me, it was the scariest thing I've ever seen in my life, there was something with ... horns in the mirror! This confirmed my suspicions, there was something wrong with that girl and I intended to find out what.

- Zee, it's time to sleep.

- Okay daddy, good night.

I turn off the light and fall asleep, but I still thinking about it for a bit before falling asleep.

(Time skip)

I was already at school, and last night I decided that in addition to discovering what is strange about this girl, I was going to keep everyone away from her, if there was something more sinister behind it, it was better to let everyone away so that no one would get hurt, so I decided to give a magic show at school today, so no one would be around Caitlin.

- Ladies and gentlemen, witness the unique, incredible and fabulous, Zee zatara!

I was waiting for people's cheers, but nobody said anything, maybe everyone was on a different side of the school? Well, I take my bench and my special effects and look for a place with a lot of people at school, and walking through the halls I saw her... it was too late, everyone was surrounding Caitlin and watching her ice skating show, there was always an ice rink here? How come I never noticed ?!

- Sister! You arrived at the right time, we watching the new girl skating on the ice, join us! (Diana)

Diana pulls my arm to take me to Caitlin's show, but I release my arm from Diana's grip.

- Everything is fine? Don't you want to see the show? (Diana)

- I-i want, but ...

I sigh.

- Diana, there is something wrong with this girl, I don't know what it is but, there is something wrong with her.

- Something wrong? What you mean? (Diana)

- Yesterday I was watching a video about her on instagram, and in the reflection of the mirror something with horns appeared, look!

I had taken a screenshot of the video if it was useful, so I showed it to Diana.

- something with horns? where? (Diana)

- Right there in the mirror!

- Zee, has nothing there. (Diana)

- b-but, you don't see it?

- ... Look zee, you must be feeling threatened by Caitlin's presence I know, but remember what I said to Barbara Minerva when she said she was the cheetah? I said "One person’s success doesn’t exclude another person’s success" you don’t have to be jealous of her, Zee.(Diana)

- No, no, no, Diana please believe me I’m not jealous of her, don’t you see the horned creature in the mirror ?!

- Sorry zee, you will need more than a blank mirror to prove that Caitlin is a monster. (Diana)

Diana is gone, she went to see the show like everyone else...

- Diana... the monster... I don't believe it, am I going crazy?

I was questioning my sanity now, she is not here at school for 3 days and is already driving me crazy, is it me who is to blame? Was my magic playing with my mind? I didn't know anything else at this point, if the diana who was born in a home full of magic and monsters didn't believe me, who else would believe it? Maybe Casey Krinsky was messing with my mind right now, I better go wash my face to ease the tension.

(In the bathroom)

- control yourself Zee, you're going crazy, keep calm! My god what is happening to me...

My makeup was totally messy now, maybe redoing it would help me, so as soon as I look in the mirror I see the horned demon's reflection, from the chest down he was just bones, his outside ribs gave him a touch ghastly.

- Do you talk to yourself? (Caitlin)

- C-ca...Caitlin ?!

I look in the mirror again, and the reflection was normal now, it was just Caitlin's reflection.

- Weren't you at your skating show?

- I was, but I had to come here to touch up my makeup, by the way, today is crazy day and nobody told me? Hahahaha (Caitlin)

She snorts out of the bathroom. In just 2 days she dropped my food, made me stumble, and ruined my school work, I was sick of her being mean to me.

- Why you hate me?

- I do not hate you Zatara, you are cool, the only problem I have with you is that you are in this school with me, I remember saying that I do not like to share, and that the title of popular girl was mine, 80% of this title already belongs to me, but if you don’t leave the game I’ll never have the rest. (Caitlin)

- I'm not leaving this school, especially since I know you're hiding something scary from the rest of the people.

- Girl, you're crazy. (Caitlin)

- I'm not crazy, what is it then?!

I show the mirror photo to Caitlin, and she smiles arrogantly.

- it's good to know that you have magic.

- W-what are you talking about?

- Find out for yourself, Zatanna.

Caitlin comes out of the bathroom, leaving me with doubts and alone there.

(Time skip)

It's been 5 days, and Caitlin is officially the most popular girl in school, my friends just talked about her and about the ice skating shows, that didn't help at all, so I decided to stay a few days alone.

- Should we go over there and talk to Zee? I'm already getting worried. (Jess)

- I tried to talk to her a couple of days ago, but she insists that Caitlin is a villain, I think we better let her have some time. (Diana)

I watched my friends from afar, I was missing them so much, but I couldn't go back without discovering the horrible thing that Caitlin was, I couldn't solve this case on an empty stomach, so I went to get a snack in the cafeteria, I got one a little bit of spaghetti and I went towards my table, but suddenly Caitlin puts her foot in front of me and I fall to the floo ... face to face with the spaghetti, the whole school laughed at me.

- I do not believe that! (Kara)

- G-guys, calm down, it could have been an accident. (Karen)

- Accident will be my fist landing on the face of that pale white girl! (Kara)

I get up, I had noodles all over my hair and face, I was already irritated by all that and I wanted to hit Caitlin, but I couldn't, Jess taught me that anger is not always the way. I was annoyed, but I tried to stay calm.

- Caitlin, can I talk to you outside for a minute?

- Of course my dear, I'll be back girls.

(Out of school)

- about what you want to talk?

- "About what you want to talk?" Really?! What was that?!

- It was an accident.

- Accident ... ACCIDENT ?! ARGH.

I got annoyed, Jess would be disappointed in me, but I couldn't take any more teasing, I ended up not even caring if she was going to know that I have magic, so I hit her with a spell of magic, and of course, I regret doing that.

- Oh my god, I'm so sorry Caitlin, I'm really sorry!

Caitlin didn't move, I was worried, and as soon as I was going to call the ambulance she started to move... But it wasn't just that, I don't know if I hit my head too hard on the food tray a few minutes ago or something like that, but, I was watching Caitlin increase in size, that's right, she was growing and her shape and clothes were changing, the sky was getting cloudy and for some reason it started to snow ... it was summer! Why was it snowing?!

- I'm already tired of you Zee zatara ... (Killer Frost)

- C-Caitlin?

I was getting farther and farther away, it was getting really weird, as Caitlin moved her shape seemed bigger, she leaned on some bricks of the destroyed wall in order to get up, and as soon as she stands, I get scared, Caitlin was super tall! She had to bend down to go through the door, she are so big.

- I will kill you, Zee zatara! (Killer Frost)

I had no more doubts, Caitlin had super powers and was ready to transform into one of her ice sculptures, I wasted no time and soon changed too, and as soon as I was going to run away, she took me by the cape.

- You're in so much trouble. (Killer Frost)

- I don't want to fight with you, please let's talk!

- I have nothing to talk to you about! (Killer Frost)

Caitlin threw me so far and so high, that I ended up on the 7th floor wall of a building. My body was hurting a lot, but I had to defeat it, but as soon as I got up, Caitlin landed on my body and tried to hang me.

- By the way, you can call me Killer Frost instead of Caitlin in the next life, Zee Zatara! (Killer Frost)

- I'm not afraid of snow!

I teleport to the opposite side of Killer Frost, I needed to defeat it somehow, so I create a loop to be able to hold it, I throw the loop at Frost, but it freezes it and turns the shards into sharp pieces of ice, then throw them at me, I teleport again and try to hit her with my magic, but she creates an ice shield to protect herself from my attacks.

- Frost, let's talk! I do not want to hurt you!

- BUT I WANT TO HURT YOU! I JUST WANTED ATTENTION, YOU ALREADY HAVE TOO MUCH ATTENTION! (Killer Frost)

The earth begins to tremble, and in the midst of so much snow a giant snake made of ice chases me, I run, but the snake captures me.

- You always had everything you wanted Zatanna, attention, love, friends, and now it's my turn to have it all!

I wanted to say something, but then I start to feel my body getting cold, I look at my legs and see that I'm starting to freeze, would this be the end of me? No ... I couldn't die like that, I needed help, and luckily, I see a shiny golden lasso looping the tail of the giant snake that held me, the snake melted, and behind it revealed five super heroines, Wonder Woman, Batgirl, Supergirl, Green Lantern and Bumblebee.

- Are you okay? (Wonder Woman)

Wonder woman said, she took my hand and saw that I had a low body temperature.

- stay out of this fight, you could end up hurting yourself even more. (Wonder Woman)

[madchild-dennis]

Valentine's day talk

Because I have to fight for my freedom, my sanity and so much more ALL ON MY OWN. My desperation for a husband has left and I'm back to the STRICT, RIGID, HARD CORE, I DO NOT SETTLE FOR LESS, version of me especially when it comes to dating or MEN or a husband.

So, as much as I was daydreaming days/weeks ago of a crush I had years ago on man I worked with once. I now do not care. ANYONE who doesn't benefit me is not beneficial especially in spaces or relationships like those. Sounds harsh, I know. When you're a giver and give abundantly. I am NOT putting people in positions where I falsely believe they are for me. When in reality they are leeches.

I HAVE NO SPACE FOR PARASITES IN ANY PART OF MY LIFE ANYMORE.

I've had enough.

With that I say "unlike valentines day last year, and the year before or some of years I was with the ex I was on and off in a long distance situationship for 5 years. I take this valentines day without feeling hurt/pain (emotionally), feeling left out, desire to be showered with red/hearts/chocolate/valentines day things from someone. As much as I do not have the capacity to shower it to myself like I would and have done, if I felt for it. I am good this Valentines day. So.

Happy Valentines Day ya'll.

______________________________________________________________

Before I go. it's NOT necessary but if you want to read it.

Let me talk about this:

Well let's talk about who I REFUSE to mention but I brought up in that video.

LET'S BE CLEAR. I HAVE NO INTEREST IN HIM. I HAVE NO DESIRE TO BE WITH HIM. That is FINAL

Why?

Let's recap:

It's a LONG thread. I'm NOT going to screenshot it here.

AND

The summary

What he has done to me:

Played with my emotions and did NOT take accountability nor care (2020)

NEVER chose me (2020 & onward)

Lied or refuse to be honest with me (2020-NOW)

Use me and string me along when it benefited him (2019-2021)

Gaslighted me

Manipulated me or attempted to with his mother and my parents

hurt me physically

hurt me emoyionally

Watch his mother and allow (if not encourage) her to stir up lies and plot & plan foolishness.

spitefully be around me to cause heartache or problems.

Ignore my needs or problems when she cause, stir up or heard it.

Act like he's a treasure and irreplaceable in all of this. While acting like I was lying and he didn't want me.

BE THOROUGHLY UNAPOLOGETIC & ENTITLED.

AND MUCH MORE...

NO CARE, NO LOVE, NO APOLOGY, NO CHANGED BEHAVIOUR; Just an ASSHOLE

What his mother has done to me:

I am friend/best friend with her when it benefited her or I was shiny/someone she could brag about. (2020-2021)

called me her daughter-in-law publicly, yes secretly when I was shiny/bragable (2020)

disrespected me

lied

attack me with my parents

stir up lies with as many people as she can about me

plot with others more lies

Ignore my needs or problems when she cause, stir up or heard it.

stalk and gossip about me when I started dating

manipulated her church family to judge and ridicule me instead of helping

plot and plan narratives to paint her son as unbothered when I needed compassion, care or more. Made sure it was brought back to me.

BE THOROUGHLY UNAPOLOGETIC.

AND MUCH MORE...

NO CARE, NO LOVE, NO APOLOGY, NO CHANGED BEHAVIOUR; Just an ASSHOLE

Remember:

NONE OF THAT IS LOVE. Neither is it 1 Corinthian 13 kind of love or ANY kind of love. Plus the most important part: I LOVE MYSELF, SO I WILL NOT GIVE MYSELF ANYTHING LESS. NO MATTER WHO. Make it worst he did most of that when God called him my HUSBAND. So definitely NOT an Ephesians 5 husband material; NOT ONE BIT.

I CAN'T BE SO FUCKING PICKY AND HOLDING OFF SEX FOR ALL THAT FUCKERY. THE FUCK NOT!!!

Hence why I said, IF he says publicly, privately or both/whatever else (I do not check and will NOT be CHECKING) he wants me/be the husband God says. Then GOD FORCES ME/DEMAND I be with him. I AM NOT CHANGING MY STANCE ON WHAT I'LL DO IF HE FUCKS UP ONCE.