#I don’t have the energy to cry right now but best believe when I do I’ll be bawling my fucking eyes out

[eatyourdamnpears]

I was supposed to go out for margaritas with my high school friends for the first time tonight, and instead I woke up from a well-needed nap in so much pain and feverish. I hate chronic illness. I just want to be able to do things that normal people my age can do

[adviceformefromme]

YOUR RE-SET

So your life isn’t looking and feeling how you envisioned. You see the TikTok and IG girlies living that life. You dream about luxury travel, pilates on a Saturday morning, drinking overpriced green smoothies, driving a sexy car, and living your fullest most authentic life…But in comparison, you’ve grown to mostly hate spending time with your friends, you’ve out grown them and notice how much they complain about life and generally are low vibes, you’ve spent all of this months wages already, and still have 2 weeks left until payday so your bank balance is no way supporting the life you dream of, to add, your dating life is a mess not consisting of your dream guy that provides for you. No, instead it seems too much effort for him to message back, let alone take you to that sexy spa you’re dying to visit. So in short your life is a far cry from what you want. The life you’ve created right now is absolutely not what you would want for yourself for the next year, or even five years. So in order to completely shift from where you are to where you want to be. You need a fucking RE-SET. 

The re-set is basically your metamorphosis. Think of being the caterpillar, heavy, slow sluggish (currently you right now). In order to become a beautiful butterfly you need to completely transform, undo, take time to reorganise so you can re-emerge as nature intended. 

The Re-set might look slightly different for everyone so take what you need from this: 

2-3 months stepping back from the people around you. 

THE CORE ESSENTIALS FOR YOUR RESET - A DAILY PRACTISE  

Meditating daily to clear you mind so you can hear yourself, your own voice and drown out any external noise. (I recommend insight timer app, or mind app both for meditations)

A journal, to document your feelings and emotions, empty your thoughts, and a space where you can become your own best friend and create a connection with yourself. 

Movement. - you need to move your body this is KEY, you might pick up running, stretching at home, pilates, yoga, HIT, whatever it is just fucking do it. Your body needs the movement to replenish its energy and move you out of stagnation. 

Healthy diet. Less alcohol more greens. If it’s processed, if its fizzy, if its sugar, if its cake, if its chocolate, if its ice cream (you get the picture), cut that shit OUT. You need food that supports you, cleanses you, energises you in order to thrive and clear your energy. 

FAITH in something bigger than yourself. If you’re religious, great lean into your faith with prayer, scripture, faith music. If you’re not religious maybe you believe in the universe, the love all around you, faith in something unknown, something guiding you, protecting you, even if you believe this is part of your own psyche - lean into this. Your faith is your support system. Your faith is the unseen that will guide and protect you on this journey. 

The above might seem overwhelming, and it will be if you don’t already incorporate those things into your day already. The worst thing you want to do is try and do everything at once and feel disappointed when you don’t succeed. So start with one thing if that’s all you can manage and focus on doing that one thing consistently and then add from that. 

The purpose of the first 2-3 months is the cleansing. You want to start slowly removing what doesn’t serve you, and start creating space for yourself, your thoughts and visions so you have space to start planting new seeds of the life you want to live. 

What your first steps in your journey might look like: 

Saying no to going out for drinks with friends, instead you go for a long walks in nature listening to an empowering podcast, go home journal and meditate. 

Weekends might look like not seeing friends, maybe even family. Doing exercise, making healthy food, researching recipes, creating a vision board on Pinterest and doing a guiding meditation, affirmations and mirror work. 

Having a prayer practise, reading books/ passages that support you in your journey 

Deleting your social medias or even doing a detox day / weekend so you have a break 

PART 2 - COMING NEXT….(Here)

[elllisaaa]

how seventeen would confess to you - hhu vers.

-> pairing : svt hhu × gn!reader

-> words count : 2.9k words

-> genre : svt members crushing on you, fluff

-> warnings : while make you giggle and kick your feet

-> sorry if I made any mistakes, english is not my first language.

-> reblogs and feedbacks are appreciated !

-> masterlist | svt masterlist

hhu vers. | vu vers. | pu vers.

CHOI SEUNGCHEOL - INTIMATE

cuddles, cuddles, cuddles !

once he tackled you on the couch or bed and you’re in his arms, you’re not getting up for at least an hour. 

watching long shows together, and you’re forbidden from watching even one episode without him, or he’ll get so pouty. 

big golden retriever energy, he’s always so smiley around you.

but also big on protecting you.

he’s the type to say “dress how you want, i can fight��, and he will definitely fight if needed.

always has an arm around you, making you feel safe in every situation

since both of you are friends since as far as you can remember, he’s like another member of your family.

i can literally picture your aunts asking you when you’re gonna marry him at every gathering lmao

with all of that, the line between friendly and romantic feelings is blurred, but cheol wished he had the courage to fully cross it. 

however, everyone and their mothers knew about his big crush on you, and about yours on him. 

his confession would be so domestic crying because i’m lonely. 

It wasn’t uncommon for you to cross paths with Seungcheol late at night. Just like you, he often got thirsty and you always ended up staying in the kitchen until the early hours of morning, and being sleepy at the family gathering. And this time was not different. Well, it was, in fact, a bit different. You had been aboard for the past year and only got back to Korea a few weeks before, so both of you hadn’t really seen each other and you had a lot to catch up on about your lives. 

“- And after that, this bitch didn’t even dare to look me in the eyes for the rest of the year ! Can you believe this ?

- I don’t like to judge people I don’t know, but she’s indeed a bitch.”

Both of you bursted out in laughter, and your heart felt warmer again. It was as if you were finally complete again. Being away from Seungcheol when he had been by your side for the majority of your life was the most difficult thing you ever had to do, and feeling him slip through your fingers as he started to respond less was horrible. He apologized so many times about how busy he was, and you knew it was not his fault, but still, you just wanted to be back home, back in his arms. 

“- Yeah, she definitely is.”

You landed your head on his shoulder with a smile, and Seungcheol feared that you would hear how fast his heart was beating. He was happy for you when you announced to him that you had the opportunity to go aboard for your studies, and he was immensely proud of you. But at the same time, all he wanted to do was convince you to not go and keep you forever with him. But he was only your best friend, and he couldn’t ask you to give up on your dreams for him. But he wished he could be your boyfriend instead. 

“- I have something to confess…”

You lifted your head from his shoulder, looking at him as you waited for his next words. Seungcheol eyes’ dived into yours, and he just knew. He knew that this was the right time, that the particular atmosphere surrounding the two of you would certainly never arise again. He had to do it now.

“- The day you left, I came to say goodbye at the airport, remember ?”

You nobbed. How could you not ? He had engulfed you in a big hug  that made you want to stay, and left you with teary eyes as you got on your flight.

“- I never told you what I did after. I drove off to the park we always played at when we were kids, and I cried on the swings for maybe two hours because all I could think about was that you were not with me. And it felt so wrong.”

Your right hand found purchase on his cheek, forcing him to look down at you as he consciously avoided your eyes since he started to tell you his little story. But your soft smile was the only reassurance he needed.

“- It felt wrong being away from you too. I missed you so much Cheol…

- Me too…”

And just like that, you both leaned in at the same time, your lips meeting in between and suddenly, everything felt right again, as if it was where you were supposed to be - in each other arms. 

“next time i’m squeezing myself in your luggage, i don’t want to spend another night without you in my arms.”

JEON WONWOO - SIMPLE

i don’t know how to explain it, but I’m sure you’ll get it when I say that this man is the definition of soft. 

he’s so cozy, every one of his hugs feels like a warm cocoon (that’s why you always find an excuse to get a hug).

very good at giving advice, and a good listener, he’s always there when you need a shoulder to cry on. 

you were friends with the other members at first, but slowly, you started to grow closer when he discovered how sweet and lovely you were. 

the more he talked with you, the more he found himself hooked.

literally has heart eyes for you (everyone and their mothers know about his crush on you) and would drop everything if you need him.

of course, he’ll be more than happy if you agreed to play video games with him, it doesn’t matter if you’re good at it or not 

it’s even better if you never played, he’ll have an excuse to make you sit on his lap while he teaches you how to use the controller. 

but in the end, he’s a simple guy, and he doesn’t see the point of hiding his crush for too long, but he also wants his confession to be meaningful. 

The boys had organized a big party for your birthday this year, and surprisingly, they succeeded at keeping it a secret until tonight. And the past months spent trying to perfect every little detail was worth it when they saw the big smile on your face and your teary eyes when you recognized your friends and family as you walked through the room. 

And even if Wonwoo couldn’t be more happy than seeing you wander around, laughing and smiling non-stop, he felt a weight on his heart. He wanted to steal you away from all these people, have you all for himself and finally tell you how he felt about you, finally tell you how glad he was to have you in his life. But he couldn’t, and he would never do that. He was just waiting patiently for your eyes to meet in the crowd, and for you to smile brightly at him. Every time you did that, his heart beat faster. 

“- Finally ! I’m so happy that everyone came, but I’m exhausted !

- I can imagine, you’ve been running around the whole night.”

You sighed dramatically as you seated yourself on the couch next to Wonwoo, resting your head on his shoulder. Like a habit, he put his arms around you, bringing you closer to him, just because you were so comfortable around each other that everyone else thought you were already dating. 

“- It’s the best surprise of my life. You guys are my favorites. Thank you for doing this for me.

- You deserved it, that and all the presents we prepared for you.”

You lifted your head from his shoulder, looking at him with a sparkle of curiosity in your eyes. 

“- And what’s yours Wonwoo ?”

He had planned to do it later, when everyone would have left, when he’ll have a moment alone with you. But if this wasn’t a sign that he had to do it now, he didn’t know what it was.

“- It’s not something material. It’s more… Spiritual I’ll say.

- It’s intriguing, tell me what it is.

- My heart. I’m offering you my heart, because you already have it, you did for a long time now, and I wanted to let you know, just in case you were feeling the same about me.”

Wonwoo knew how emotional you could get, but he didn’t expect you to cry from his confession. Still, he wiped your tears away, waiting for you to calm down with a soft smile on his face.

“- I feel the same, I’ve been feeling the same for so long. You have my heart too.”

“I’ll take care of it, I promise. I’ll always protect you.”

KIM MINGYU - JOYFUL

100% golden retriever energy

you would often tease him along with the members (because we all know that seventeen ultimate goal is to make fun of mingyu)

partner privilege : would not get as pouty as with his members, all it takes is a smile from you and you’re forgiven.

however, when you tease him about how being so muscular but so afraid of everything is a shame, he’ll be like a child throwing a tantrum. 

pouting until you compliment him (and cannot stop blushing once you do, he’s so cute someone help me).

tries to impress you all the time by flexing his muscles, showing how strong he is. 

he’s so obvious please, this boy cannot hide his love for you.

follows you everywhere like a lost puppy, just in case you need him (he’s adorable).

he feels so comfortable around you because beyond all the teasing, you’re very understanding and kind. 

you’re always here to remind him how amazing he is every time he doubts himself. 

and because he feels so comfortable around you, his confession would slip like it was the most natural thing ever. 

Mingyu always had a tendency to show off his skills whenever you were in the same room as him. Yes, he felt an incredible ego boost when you complimented him about his muscles, but what he took real pride in was how much he was able to make you laugh. He always feared that his jokes were lame, or just not your type of humor, but every time he cracked one, you bursted into giggles. And by the way you were beaming, there was no way that you were faking it. 

And he always managed to make you laugh in all types of situations, chuckling and resisting the urge of kicking his feet like a teenager everytime you hitted his shoulder playfully as you tried to contain your own giggles. Mingyu was addicted to the way your eyes were glowing with joy everytime you just smiled. However, he discovered that the easiest way to get you to laugh was to tell you all the stupid things his members did. Like now, as you were crying from how funny you found the story of Seungkwan volley ball. 

“- He really only discovered it when he saw that video ?

- Yeah, really ! You should’ve seen the betrayal in his eyes, it was priceless !”

And you were laughing again, your head thrown back, tears almost spilling out of your eyes. But Mingyu wasn’t laughing anymore, too lost in his contemplation, because you were literally a work of art to him. Every single detail about you was perfect, the more he discovered, the more he wanted to be yours.

“- Your smile is so beautiful, gosh… I love you so much…”

The melody of your giggles died as soon as you registered the meaning of his words. Silence enveloped the both of you as you stared at him as if you were trying to enter his mind and find all the answers to your questions. And Mingyu was forcing himself to keep his mouth shut, and not embarrass himself further, already cursing himself in his head for being so careless.

“- Wha- What did you say ?”

Mingyu was too focused on his overthinking to notice the little grin spreading on your lips. Of course, you already knew that he had a crush on you. Of course, you had a crush on him too because who doesn’t ? And of course, it was very cute to watch him stumble over his words with red cheeks. 

“- I-I said that you have a beautiful smile…

- And after that ?

- Don’t want to tell you.”

You giggled as you leaned in to peck his warm cheeks, restraining yourself from going in for his pouty lips too.

“- Well, just know that I love you so much too Gyu.”

“see, you heard it perfectly ! but i’ll tell you a hundred times if you want me to.”

CHWE HANSOL - BRIGHT

he’s so random, like one minute he could joke along with you and the other he’s asking you the most existential question possible, fully serious about it. 

like we say vernon is just vernoning in the most vernon way possible. 

he's very chill about pretty much everything so it's really soothing to be around him.

he's your go-to person when you want to isolate yourself from the rest of the world because you could spend evenings just watching tv and not saying a word to each other

there's also times where both of you end up talking about your lives until the early hours of the morning. 

your relationship feels like it's all natural, there has never been an awkward state, only comfort. 

it's like hansol had known you for years because he felt so at ease every time you were with him. 

you made him feel like he was special and normal at the same time, and even if he doesn't show it often, he really appreciates it. 

you two liked to stay inside so it was rare for you to go out somewhere, but it was always unexpected and when it happened. 

hansol knew that you liked to be surprised, and often showed up on his days off to take you somewhere without telling you.

that's why you weren't shocked when he picked you up at 5 in the morning, on a random Sunday. 

“- Can I at least choose the music ?

- Go on.”

Hansol handed you his phone which was connected to the speakers of his car, letting you put on whatever song you wanted. He owed you this with how early he forced you to get out of bed on one of your days off. But he really wanted to take you to this spot he loved. He played it off as one of his random wishes, but he planned this in his mind for a long time, not all the details, but he knew he wanted to bring you there to tell you how he felt. 

He watched with a small smile on his lips as you opened the window, one of your favorite songs playing as you let the wind hit your face and make your hair fly all over your face. Hansol quickly focused on the road again, seeing that he was near your destination, he asked you to close your eyes.

“- Are we there ?

- Almost.”

The rest of the way was quiet, a comfortable silence settling between the two of you. When you finally felt that Hansol had stopped the car, you heard him go out of the driver seat to get to your side and help you get out too, ordering you to keep your eyes closed. He pushed you to take some steps forward before he finally authorized you to see what was in front of you.

“- You took me to the ocean ?”

You didn’t even turn around to look at him, too entranced by the sight in front of you. And all Hansol could do was smile when he saw how parkly your eyes were. 

“- I guess that I wanted you to see the sunset.”

You were rather speechless as Hansol got a blanket out of his car, leading you to the beach for you two to watch the sunrise on the horizon. He contemplated you as you ran around, touching the water to see if it was cold or not before finally sitting down beside him, your head finding his place on his shoulder, and his arms around yours.

“- Thank you for bringing me there… It’s beautiful…

- I wanted to make it special.”

Before you could even ask him what he was talking about, Hansol leaned in, his eyes fixed on your lips, and yours on his. Basking in the warm light of the sunset, he kissed you for the first time but certainly not the last, a smile spreading on his face as he rested his forehead against yours. 

“i think i could get used to this.”

-> i don't allow any copies, reposts or translations of my works.

svt taglist (fill in this to be added) :

@lil-kpopstan @hann1bee @iraisswiftie

[chrollohearttags]

oh nufffinnnn just thinking bout eren telling reader to “stop running” and to “move her hand”

why? Whyyyy would y’all do this to meeeee? 😫 knees just buckled and everything (and not just because one of them is out of place)

content warning/themes: bsf eren bc im obsessed now, black fem reader (plus size descriptors) missionary, mentions of nudes, back scratching, hair pulling, daddy’s used, pet names (pretty girl, mama) creaming, full nelson

“ ‘Ren!—Eren, okaaayy! Ooh, you win!”

crying out in a fussy huff as your once best friend turned lover hovered the entirety of his six foot three slender frame towered over yours. A firm grip from both hands keeping your feet pent back near your head and your legs wide open..perfect for him to fuck you as he saw fit. How exactly had you landed yourself in such a position? Well..

“I know. I always do, baby. So I don’t know why you play like I can’t handle your fine ass..talking about ‘you don’t even know what to do with me’…out ‘your fucking mind. And I told you to stop tryna’ run because you’re not going anywhere. Take this fucking dick like a good girl. You can do that, can’t you?”

once again, silly banter ensued between you two and he yet again, had to prove you wrong. It wasn’t long after he had exited basketball practice and an intense workout; still pent up with energy and plenty of arousal..especially after you sent him some rather salacious messages. The two of you weren’t certain if you were ready to put a label on things but you were damn sure having a ball engaging in activities that couples would. Like calling one another pet names, even around other people. This time, he just so happened to be changing in front of his two closest homeboys when you FaceTimed…fresh out the shower, wrapped in a towel and looking good as fuck! The thoughts that ran through his head were not ones that he should have around other people. He had to all but restrain himself from getting hard right there in that locker room. And you didn’t make matters worse when he got to his car and you had sent him nudes. “I’m at practice right now, mama, I gotta call you back.” Videos of you playing with that pretty pussy, telling him to come stretch you out instead. Taunting him with mentions of being too tired to handle you. Watching cream drip all down those fingers..and the sound of wetness while that sexy voice moaned his name and called him daddy? You had to pay for that! So he cleared up any confusion when he stopped by your apartment, keys still in hand when you strutted out in nothing more than an anklet, white painted toes and a bonnet. Dropping to your knees to devour his dick where he stood. Spitting, slurping and sucking him off as if you lacked a gag reflex. He couldn’t believe how nasty you got for him..it was treatment he could get used to! Which in turn, swiftly got you hoisted up in the air and fucked into oblivion, right there in that living room. Only now, he was getting his lick back for your earlier commentary.

“You so deep in this fucking pussy, daddy…I—I’m sorrryyy.”

attempting to tap at his abs and push him away.. to which he’d only laugh, slapping it out of the way with minimal force because you were so depleted. He’d slow down his thrusts just a tad because maybe he had been fucking your shit up. But you weren’t done yet, he was sure and neither was he. You were going to eat your words. Slowly circling that clit with his thumb pad, he’d coo to you with the other palm on your cheek, finally releasing the grip on your legs..

“Yeah? You’re sorry? Afraid I can’t accept that, pretty girl…imma need you to come for me at least two more times before I can forgive you..”

it was in that moment that you realized what type of demon you were truly messing with! Leaning down, he’d spit into your slippery folds and keep pumping that cock in and out. “Oh my God, I can’t stand youuuu..shit!” Laughing as you glared up at one another, laughing and enjoying the moment. But you weren’t getting let off of the hook so easily!

“And move that hand, you’re not slick..you’re getting all this dick. Show me you can handle it.”

[damiansgoodgirll]

Hiii I love Ur judgment day x readers they are so adorable

Could you please write a JD (Platonic) x Reader where Y/n gets in a bad fight with their partner and they comfort them

the judgment day x reader (platonic)

‼️cheating and gaslighting, your bf name in this is alexander bc my ex name is alexander and now i hate alexanders

(i love this pic btw)

i don’t wanna love

“you’re overacting!” your boyfriend alexander kept screaming at you.

overreacting?

“so you’re telling me there’s nothing between the two of you? that i’ve been hallucinating for the past month?” you screamed back, tired of trying talking with him.

“there’s nothing between me and her” he said, lying. because of course you had the proofs that he was cheating, that he was seeing someone else while you were out touring.

“how can i fucking believe you when i have proofs!”

“what proofs?” he asked, not caring about the whole cheating part.

“the pictures of you two together? the messages? the-…”

“you went over my phone without even asking me?” he was angrier that before.

“i did! because you wouldn’t tell me the truth! you can’t deny what i just found!”

“okay, fine! i cheated, is that what you wanted me to say? i did it, and i wasn’t proud of it but you were always gone and i was here alone waiting for you every week to come home, i got tired and i wanted to have some fun and one night i went to this club where i met her, and she was always there for me, it wasn’t just sex, there was a connection…she understood me, she was there when you were out wrestling with your friends!” he said, not feeling guilty at all.

you couldn’t believe he was blaming him cheating on you on the fact that you were away from home because of your job.

“i can’t believe it that you are blaming your fucking childish behaviour on me being away because of my job!”

“i needed you and you weren’t there!” he kept screaming.

“so the best solution was fucking some bitch you met at the bar uh?” you were done with it “you have ten minutes to pack your things and get out of my house!”

“what are you talking about? where am i supposed to go?” he asked you.

“i don’t know, ask my replacement if you can stay at her’s, i don’t care, now, move before i call the police. this is my house, do you remember?” you said locking yourself in the guest bedroom and waiting for him to be over with packing.

you were sure you heard him closing the door once he was done packing and leaving your house. you were too tired to even go back into the master bedroom that you cried yourself to sleep right where you were.

the morning after you were supposed to go at rhea’s as you guys needed to prepare your upcoming match but you were drained and had no energy. you felt like shit and all you wanted to do was staying in bed and cry.

the team immediately knew something was up when you didn’t show up at her place. so instead of calling your or texting, you found them in front of your door.

“what are you doing here?” you asked them.

“we were worried. you didn’t show up, you didn’t call or text, we thought you were sick or that something happened…wait, were you crying?” rhea stopped when she saw your red eyes.

“no” you lied.

“whats going on love?” finn soft voice almost made you want to cry again. he always had a soft spot for you, treating you like a daughter.

“i just…i wanna be alone today…now, can you please go?” you almost begged them but they got it as an invitation to come inside so now you found yourself with your friends sitting on your couch, waiting for an explanation from you.

“what is going on uh?” damian asked you again.

“alexander and i broke up…” you whispered and waited for them to talk but they let you continue “he was cheating on me and i found out…instead of apologising he blamed it on me, saying that it was my fault because i was away touring and he needed me here…i just…what did i do wrong?” you cried again and now rhea was sitting next to you, holding you in her arms.

“you didn’t do anything wrong y/n…” she whispered.

“he was saying how much he wanted to marry me, to have a family with me just to find out that he was fucking someone else behind my back…it fucking hurts because i was ready to be with him for the rest of my life…i really loved him” you cried harder and rhea swore that alexander was a dead man.

“hey…” finn, the parental figure inside the whole group sweet talked to you “it’s not worth it…crying for him? it’s not worth it, he’s not worth it…i know you’re hurting right now and it will hurt for a while but eventually it’ll pass…it’ll get better, trust me…”

“thank you…” you whispered.

still crying in rhea’s arms as she let you. you never experienced such heartbreak and the pain you were feeling was too much.

“i just don’t understand how it went so downhill…everything was going perfectly…i would have noticed if something was wrong but i swear, everything looked normal” you cried.

“it’s not your fault love” finn said.

“finn’s right, you couldn’t have noticed…if he was acting normal, you couldn’t have noticed the sudden changes in his persona…i’m so sorry it happened to you, you don’t deserve it…” dominik said while sitting on the carpet, in front of you.

“i swear… i don’t wanna fall in love anymore” hearing such words coming from you hurt the group. you’ve always been the sweet and romantic one, you’ve always dreamed of a fairytale life and now you believed everything was a lie.

rhea looked sad “don’t say that love, it’s just a phase but you will feel better, i promise you”

of course. you were complaining about your disastrous love life with dom, who just got married, rhea, who’s gonna get married soon, finn, who’s been married for years and damian, someone that wasn’t looking for love and couldn’t understand anything about love.

“it’s easy coming from you…you’re all happy and in a healthy relationship, you all trust each other and i’m pretty sure you’ve never been cheated on” you regretted immediately saying that but you were hurting.

“we had our painful break ups too honey…” rhea said. she knew you were hurting so she didn’t mind it.

“did they cheat on you?” you asked them.

“no but…”

“exactly” you said, drowning your head in your pillows.

“what rhea was trying to say is that break ups are always hurtful, whether you get cheat on or not…and this pain you’re feeling, will get better, in a month or two you’ll be feeling better…” damian spoke softly to you. knowing that you were already in pain and that he didn’t want to upset you more.

“we will leave you alone if you want to…” rhea said, not wanting to leave you alone but she knew you probably needed time for yourself.

“no please…” you said shocking everyone.

“okay…then we’ll stay here…we can watch a movie if you want to” finn suggested and you all agreed.

“no rom com please” you said making them laugh.

rhea’s idea was to watch a horror movie but while they were all watching the movie you ended up falling asleep, too tired for all the tears you’ve been crying.

[targaryenluvs]

SHADOW / EVAN BUCKLEY

PAIRINGS: Evan Buckley x Girlfriend!Reader

SUMMARY: Evan would go to great lengths to make sure his girlfriend never leaves.

WARNINGS: Stalking, baby trapping, sexual depictions, obsessive behaviour, invasion of privacy, babying, isolation

WORDCOUNT: 3.3K Words

A/N: Uhm, let’s not talk about this…

Evan was in love.

For the first time in his life he was truly, head over heels for someone. Even he himself couldn’t believe it. His friends all noticed the change in demeanour. The excessive happiness that he seemed to radiate at all time. They couldn’t find it in themselves to be anything but happy for him.

He’d had his fair share of relationships, but of course they didn’t last. Whether it was off on travels, untrustworthiness or a bad connection. They didn’t last. But with you, he knew you were the one. From the way you looked up at him, the way you smiled when he held your hand. You never judged him, dealt with his family issues as well as his own recklessness.

You were perfect, in every way. And Buck knew it. It’s why when he found out you were think about breaking up with him that he found himself spiralling.

He’d been using your phone to text Bobby, to tell him he wasn’t coming in the next day. You’d both planned to have a beach day, since the both of you had been busy lately. After texting Bobby, a text from your friend has caught his eye.

Just break up with him!

Evan could feel his heart racing, what the hell?

So he pressed on the conversation and found his worst nightmare. You’d been talking to her about how you found yourself with less time alone, almost always being dragged out to a restaurant or some other place by Buck. You felt smothered, but didn’t have the heart to tell him. If you’d told him he was being clingy he would’ve tried to dial it back. But speaking about him behind his back? To your bitch of a friend?

It wasn’t right of you. And it wasn’t right of her to encourage these thoughts. She’d met Evan before, multiple times. She always talked about how perfect the two of you were for each other. And here she was, trying to get you to leave him, your soulmate.

So he texted her, on your behalf.

I’m not breaking up with him, don’t text me. I don’t want to see you anymore.

Then he blocked her number.

“Evan?” His head rose from the pillow, looking down at you as you walked into the apartment. “Yeah babe? Everything okay?” He heard you jogging up the stairs, “Maya blocked me, I think. I tried to talk to her on Insta and she told me to screw myself. I don’t know what I did wrong.” Bucks heart hurt at the sight of you crying.

“Oh baby, you didn’t do anything. You shouldn’t be thinking about a friend who can be so rude with no explanation. C’mere.” He held his arms out for you as you settled into his arms, tears dampening his shirt. “I’ve got you, you’re okay.” He cradled your head against his chest. “I— I just don’t know what I did.”

“Shh, don’t waste your energy on her. Okay?” Your head lifted, “Okay…” He could sense your uncertainty, you’d been friends with Maya for a while, almost a year. He knew it’d be hard for you to get over it, but it was for the best. Evan knew what was best for you.

Your boyfriend was acting strangely, to say the least.

He’d been much more involved with your friends now. Always asking after them, what you guys were doing, whether or not Maya came back in touch. It felt as if you couldn’t breathe in their presence without a million texts from him.

Evan ❤️

Where are you right now?

Who’s with you?

When are you coming home?

Home. He always assumed you were coming to his place. As if you were already living together when you’d only been together for five months. Even when you brought it up to him, he’d brush his actions off.

“I mean we’re practically living together already no? What’s the point in you having your things somewhere else when you can have it here. Saves you a trip in the morning baby.” Evan murmured into your neck as you stood in the bathroom. “I… I have my own place Evan. I like having my own place. It’s not just my things that are there. It’s my place.” His arms briefly tightened around you at the sound of your protest.

“I know, but don’t you want to live with me? Be with me?” Buck retracted his face from your neck, his arms circling around your neck as your hands held on to his arms. “I do! I do want to be with you. I am with you baby.” His frown disappeared in a second, replaced with an unsettling smile. “That’s what I thought.” He kissed your cheek before walking out the door.

You stared into the mirror. What the hell does that mean? That’s what I thought? You shook your head in an attempt to collect your thoughts. Did you want to be in this relationship? Where you felt like you were being babysat? As if Buck was your parent, always asking where you were and who with. As if you couldn’t handle yourself, needing supervision.

It took you another month to realise this isn’t what you wanted in a relationship. You wanted to be equals, to rely on eachother and trust each other. The ability to go out and not give your exact location every ten minutes. To not feel as if you have an overwhelming pressure behind you, always looming. Like a shadow.

But it was a month too long. You’d given Evan even more access into your life. He’d sweet talked you into sharing your live location with you. Even your bank account was accessible to him, being able to overlook your transactions. He had keys to your apartment and even his face ID on your phone (not that you knew he had access to your phone).

You’d confided in your best friend. And she’d encouraged you the whole time. She herself hadn’t noticed Evan’s overbearing behaviour, he always handled himself properly in public. Not a single person would suspect him of being so controlling. He was to sweet for that. And even if they noticed his clinginess, they viewed it as a sweet trait.

He loves you so much he can’t breathe without you. Half of his personality had become you. His wallpaper was a photo of the two of you, his password was now your birthday. His pantry and fridge were filled with your favourite foods, even when you weren’t staying over.

It was all you. Evan finally had someone to love, to spoil and to hold with all his might. He’d be damned if someone tried to take you from him. So when he used your phone to call an Uber since you’d both walked to the restaurant, imagine his surprise and anger in finding another friend of yours against him.

Y/n: I think I’ll tell him tonight, at his place. Somewhere he feels comfortable and won’t be embarrassed.

Rebekah: Good idea, I hope he takes it well. I don’t think he means to cling in all honesty. Might just be a subconscious decision since he hasn’t had many long term relationships. Hopefully he finds someone for him.

Y/n: I know, me too. I just feel so bad, he’s had like two or three girlfriends before me and none of them worked out :(

Rebekah: I know babe, but don’t stay with him out of pity. That’s even worse for him.

Y/n: It’s not pity, I’m not still with him out of pity. I really do love him, but I can’t help feeling as if I have no space. He’s always asking for where I am, and with whom. It’s overbearing. And he seemingly can’t handle me being independent, as if I need him to do everything for me. I’m not a child.

Rebekah: You aren’t, no where near it. I get that you love him, but this isn’t healthy. You both deserve better. Some girls love a guy who cares so much. Wishing you all the best, I have a wine bottle waiting for us x

Y/n: Maybe I can wait to do it another night? I’m having a good time, reminds me why I love him :(

Rebekah: No!! If you keep going you’ll never get away.

Y/n: Pleaseeee??

Rebekah: Breakup sex isn’t a horrible idea. Might soften the blow lmao 🤣

Y/n: That’s not what I meant! I’m gonna go, and am NOT leaving to have sex.

Rebekah: Whatever you say, happy break up day xx 💋

Happy break up day? What a bitch.

If there was one aspect of your relationship that never suffered, it was in the bedroom. And Evan couldn’t help but notice when he was closing your open apps, your cycle tracking app. His thumb hovered over it, he looked around to make sure you weren’t returning from the bathroom. Only a few words stuck out for Evan.

High chance of getting pregnant.

You soaked in the ride back to Evans place. One more night with him, that’s all you were giving him. The idea of breaking up with sounded alright over text, but actually facing it? Your hands were sweating, heart racing. You didn’t want to let go, but you knew you had to.

Now or never.

Your eyes darted around Evans apartment, soaking it all up for your last time, when his hands came around your waist as he kissed your neck. “A bit eager aren’t we?” You joked as his hold tightened, “Mhm.” He grabbed you by the hips before turning you to face him, “You look amazing, and you smell so good.” You couldn’t help but blush at the compliments, Evan always knew how to make a girl blush.

“I do?” His hands cradled your face, kissing you on the forehead, “You do baby.” Evan’s hands travelled down to your butt, “Up.” He only needed one word, and so did you. He carried you up the stairs, then softly laying you down on the bed.

Evan was swift in taking your dress off, then his own outfit. “I love you.” He spoke as he thrust into you, your hands held on tightly to his hair, “Oh god Evan!” He couldn’t contain his smirk, he loved you like this. An absolute mess, all for him.

“Say it back.” His fingers dug into your hips.

“Ow! What?” Your brain was foggy, Evans words went in and out your ears.

“Say. It. Back.” His voice held no sweetness, it was purely demanding. His pace was brutal, and again it felt as if you couldn’t breathe. The pleasure was overwhelming, you felt so good. “I…” Your heart was racing again, it felt wrong to tell him you loved him.

His teeth bit down on your collarbone, “I love you!”

You shouldn’t have said it back. It was all that you could think about as his demeanour changed again, a lovesick grin on his face as he kissed you passionately. His hands felt heavy on your skin, burning into you. All you could feel was Evan. Your head was hazy as he carried you, bridal style. The water was warm, and so was he.

Evan slid in behind you in the bath, his arms were strong around you. He took his time in cleaning you off, savouring the moment. “You hungry?” He sounded so casual, as if he hadn’t literally bruised you moments before. “A little.” Your voice was quiet for some reason, you didn’t know why. “We’ll have anything you want.”

That night you spent with him was one of the weirdest of your life. You felt safe with him, more so than you felt with anyone else. But you couldn’t shake the memories of prior times. Him literally crashing a birthday party to make sure you were where you said you were. Evan dragging you back into bed when you needed to work. Him telling you to not reach for the top shelf, saying it was ‘too much for you’. Or him cutting up your food.

Everytime he looked at you, you felt conflicted.

Was this what love was? Uncertainty? Through the night you found yourself tired. Your brain was constantly filing through a million thoughts, about Evan, about yourself and your life. You loved him, but would it be wrong to stay with someone who seemingly infiltrated every aspect of your life? You didn’t know, all you knew was that the pizza was amazing and he was snuggly.

So you stayed the night. You’d fallen asleep in his arms halfway through ‘Me Before You’. You’d spent majority of the movie arguing over whether she should’ve stayed with him or left. And whether he should’ve lived to be with her. “It’s not right! He’s miserable! She should be understanding of him wanting to leave! Which she is in the end.” Evan shook his head as he tossed his slice into the box. “You’re so wrong.” You gasped.

“He should stayed for her. He knew she loved him and it was selfish of him to leave.”

“He was miserable Evan!”

“Would you leave me if I lost my ability to walk?”

Well that sentence shut you up quickly. “I—, I wouldn’t. I’d stay with you. But the movie is different, she meets him afterwards. He’s already miserable, and she makes it better, yes. But he knows he can’t give her the life she deserves. So he’s selfless in letting her go. And also, if you wanted to go, I’d support you. I’d be sad, yes, but you’re not happy. And I’d want you to be happy.”

“I’d never tell you to leave me. You’re too good to let go. Having you by my side is all I need.” You remained staring at the screen, unable to move. “Thank you.” Evan raised his eyebrows at your dismissal of his words.

“I love you Y/n.”

You turned to him with a small smile, “Love you too.” And within ten minutes, you were sleeping in his arms. Evan glanced down at you with a smile before pulling out his phone. He typed out the date of yesterday. It seemed like a date he’d need to remember. And it was lucky, in about nine months, he’d be holding a mini you in his arms.

You woke up with Evans arm draped over you, locking you in place. You slipped out slowly, grabbing a shirt and leggings of yours. You’d failed in breaking up with him, you knew you had. Last night had sucked you right back in to the storm that was Evan Buckley.

He looked at peace when he slept. Content. Maybe you could have a talk with him about boundaries. You weren’t ready to let go of him yet. And it was exactly what he was counting on, he’d wormed his way into your life. To the point where you weren’t sure what life was like without him.

Evan kept his eyes closed as you left. Letting you think you’d gotten away without him knowing. Last night was amazing in his opinion, and when you didn’t respond through out the day he surprisingly kept his cool. He had a good feeling about the night, and if he was lucky, you’d come crawling back either way.

The day had been quiet, you ran some errands, completed your laundry. And with only one text for Evan compared to the usual twenty.

Have a good day ❤️

You found yourself smiling at the text. Simple and sweet. Maybe he’d read your mind and was now reeling back? God you hoped he was adjusting his behaviour. And through the rest of the week, he didn’t show up. He didn’t randomly come to pick you up from work, or bombard you with calls and texts when you went out for drinks. You’d become so accustomed to telling him your location that he didn’t have to ask.

You called every day, barely over an hour. Just debriefing eachother about your days and gossiping. It felt as if you were both improving in your relationship. You were lowering your guard, and he was working his way in. He wasn’t being too pushy, and you weren’t being protective.

And it was a new chapter in your eyes. Since he’d stayed that way. You found yourself even happier than usual. Going out with him more willingly, especially to dinners with the 118. In two months, they saw more of Bucks girlfriend then they had in the previous 7-8 months.

And whilst you may not have noticed any changes of your own physically, Evan sure did. He felt them, your chest was heavier, and a slight bump was developing. You’d recently been an avid sushi lover when it came to eating out, and you’d been having cravings.

You’d confided in Evan about missing your period, and whilst he acted concerned, it was probably the best news he’d ever gotten. He’d come home the next day after his shift with about six different home pregnancy tests. And you’d been willing to take them.

His world stopped when each one came out positive. But first he had to gauge your reaction, the relief was unmatched when you turned to him with a smile. “We’re having a kid.” You whispered as he nodded, “A mini you, or me.” Tears fell down your face as you squealed before jumping onto him. He laughed as you buried your face into his shoulder before facing him, “You’re gonna be a daddy.” And he couldn’t help but cry himself.

You were going to be a family.

Evan was outstanding when it came to taking care of you. Anything you needed was in front of you within the hour. You’re tired? Here’s a pillow, blanket and soothing sounds to help you sleep. You’re hungry? Here’s every craving that he’s logged of yours, with delivery on the way. You’re sore? He’s got oil in his hands and eager look on his face, to which you tease him.

“Missed me that much huh?”

“You have no idea.” He whispered before kissing you.

It was a Friday dinner at Bobby and Athena’s when you announced the pregnancy to them. To which you were met with blank stares which eventually erupted into cheers and hugs.

“Oh god, Bucks having a kid before me.” Chimney shuddered as Evan slapped his bicep, “Evans going to be an amazing father.” You smiled as he grinned, “Why thank you Mrs Buckley.” He kissed you before you could react, is marriage around the corner for you?

“Well actually…” Maddie spoke out as you all turned, “Oh my god, are we pregnant at the same time?” Her small nod caused chaos to erupt amongst the home, “Two new additions to the family!” Bobby cheered. Chimneys mind was close to exploding as he hugged her.

“I’m so happy they all know.” You spoke happily as Evan sighed, “I can’t believe she’s pregnant.” You kissed his cheek before holding his hands, “Do we need to have the butterflies and bees talk?” He rolled his eyes as you pretended to pout, and he poked your cheek.

“Can’t believe we’re going to be a family. The three of us, forever.” Evan kissed the top of your head as Athena and Bobby smiled, “They’re going to be great parents.” Bobby nodded along, “Can’t believe Buck’s going to be a father. I remember his first day, and now he has a whole family.” He couldn’t help the slight tears in his eyes.

As Evan stood in the middle of the room he felt happier than ever. He had a family he loved and a family member on the way. He knew he finally had everything the could’ve ever wanted. Especially with the girl he loved in his arms, and he’d never let go.

[forever-rogue]

For the I love you prompts how about tasm!peter and

[  ASLEEP  ]:     sender, having climbed into bed to cuddle the receiver (who they believe to be asleep), tells them that they love them.

🥹💕I just think this radiates Peter energy 😫

AN |  Alright, so this is just soft and with a happy ending❤️

Pairing | tasm!Peter Parker x Fem!Reader

Warnings | Language

Word Count | 3.3k

Masterlist | Main | Peter

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

“Peter?” It was the combination of how softly you said his voice contrasted to your rapid knocking that captured his attention more than anything. He stopped what he was doing, jumping off the couch before almost running to the door. He opened it without hesitation, only to frown deeply when he saw you on the other. Peter was always over the moon to see you…but he hated seeing you upset. You looked at him with teary eyes, lips trembling with effort not to cry, “hi.”

“Hey,” he pulled you into his arms before you could say anything else, and you fell apart as soon as he touched you. You buried your face into his chest, holding on to him tightly as he brought you inside and closed the door. His heart broke as he listened to you sniffle, trying your best to hold in your tears, “it’s okay, sweetheart. It’s alright, I’ve got you.”

“I know,” your soft response was muffled by the fabric of his t-shirt, “‘m sorry.”

“Don’t apologize,” he rested his head on top of yours, rubbing your back in soothing circles, “you don’t ever have to apologize.”

Peter felt you nod in response before the emotion overwhelmed you and the tears started to roll down your cheeks. It wasn’t long before he felt the cotton of his shirt get soaked. He held you, rocking you gently back and forth until you slowly calmed down. The boy possessed many amazing qualities and skills, and giving the best hugs in the world was one of them.

“C’mere,” he loosened his grip, smiling softly when he saw the pretty pout on your lips, already missing his touch. He took your hand in his, his much larger one dwarfing yours as he led you to the couch. He set you before kneeling in front of and tenderly brushing away your tears with his thumb before pushing a few rogue locks of hair behind your hair, “do you know what this moment calls for?”

“For me to stop being a blubbering idiot?” you asked meekly, the corner of your mouth twitching up ever so slightly. 

“First of all - no,” he tutted softly, “and secondly - you’re not an idiot. The moment calls for hot chocolate.”

“Oh,” your eyes widened in excitement and you reminded him of a kid on Christmas morning, “will there be mini marshmallows?”

“You should know by now that I always keep  a bag on hand for you,” he gently tapped your chin with his knuckle before standing up, “just back, get comfy, and I will be right back.”

“Do you need a hand, Pete?”

“Absolutely not,” he insisted, “you stay and I’ll be back. Less than ten minutes. Pick out something to watch - and it better be something good!”

He pressed a kiss to your forehead, such a normal thing for either of you to do, and as always it made your stomach burst with butterflies. You watched him go, already feeling a million times better; Peter had that effect on you. No matter what happened or what was going on, he always made everything better. 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Peter made good on his promise and was back in even less time than he originally promised, two large mugs in his hands. You gratefully took one of them and moved so he had plenty of room to sit next to you. He set his own mug on the coffee before grabbing the big, fluffy blanket off the back of the couch and draping it over the two of you. He’d never admit it, but he bought that blanket because you had liked it so much at the store and he wanted you to have it at his place whenever you wanted it. He was thoughtful like that, among so many other things.

You pulled the blanket around your frame before cuddling up into his side before putting your feet on the table. Next to Peter, whether at his place or yours, or anywhere else was definitely your favorite place in the world. You’d put on some random show, more for background noise rather than anything else. 

“Want to talk about it?” he asked after a few moments of quiet. You knew it was coming but it still made you sigh softly, “you don’t have to if you don’t want to. But I hope you know you can tell me anything.”

“Of course I know,” you gently nudged your arm into his side, “you’re my best friend, Pete. I trust you more than anything or anyone in this world.”

“Yeah?” he teased softly, giving that boyish smile you adored, “glad to know the feeling’s mutual.”

You finished off the rest of your hot chocolate and set the mug down, shifting in your seat so you were facing him. You couldn’t quite bring yourself to meet his eyes, knowing it would make you want to cry all over again. It wasn’t even Peter himself that made you want to cry; if you were being completely honest with yourself, it was that you knew he would never be yours.It was something you’d accepted over the years - not that it made it any easier - which is why you forced yourself to date other people. 

Not that any of those worked. You knew why this never did. This time around, your current boyfriend figured out exactly why. 

“Matt, umm…he broke up with me today,” you confessed, voice dropping so much that the average person definitely would not have heard you, but you knew that Peter heard you loud and clear. His eyebrows raised in surprise, so high they almost disappeared into his hairline. 

“I…what?” he asked softly, clearly not believing what you had said. Although there was no reason you’d lie to him. It just seemed so sudden, “he broke up with you? That makes no sense. You two were so good together.”

Too good together if you asked Peter Parker.

“Well,” you exhaled slowly before shrugging your shoulders, “I guess we weren’t. At least not to him. So…he ended things today.”

“Did something happen?” he asked softly, putting a finger under your chin to turn your face up towards his. He could see that the tears were welling up again and wished he could do something to make it all better. Peter could see that you were struggling with trying to find the words, “did he do something?”

“No,” you shook your head, wrapping your fingers around his wrist and pulling his hand away. Despite the fact that he broke up with you - for the most valid of reasons - you couldn’t find it in your heart to dislike him. He wasn’t a bad person….he just got caught up with someone that happened to be in love with someone else, “he didn’t. I’m not…it sucks, but I’m not mad at him. I guess it’s just the situation.”

Peter could tell that you were holding back and not telling him the entire truth but he always didn’t want to push you. He knew you’d talk about the full details if and when you were ready.  He let out a small sigh to commiserate with you before reaching over and putting his hand on your face, resting it on your cheek, “well, if you ever want to talk about it, just let me know. And if it’s any consolation, it’s his loss. Anyone would be a fool to let you go. You’re gold, sweetheart - I can’t believe he didn’t see that.”

You swallowed thickly, desperately wanting to ask what about you, Peter? Do you want me?

But you didn’t. You weren’t about to throw about two decades worth of friendship out the window just because you couldn’t get your feelings in check. 

“Thanks Pete,” you bit the inside of your cheek to keep from saying anything else. Did he really have to look at you like that? With the sweetest, most honeyed eyes that made you want to get on your knees and beg him to love you? You nodded instead, keeping your mouth shut, “there’s some girl out there that’s going to be so lucky to get to love you one day, Parker. Whether or not you see it, you’re a huge catch.”

His cheeks flushed a pretty shade of rose as he turned his head away. You laughed softly. The sound went straight to his heart and was easily his favorite sound in the world. He gave you your knee a small squeeze, “well, I guess one day we’ll both find those people that are worthy won’t we?”

“Mhmm,” you hummed softly, “can I ask you for a favor?”

“Anything.”

“Can I stay tonight?” you asked, as if Peter Parker ever said no to you, “you know what, I’m so rude. I just kind barged right now and didn’t even ask if you had plans or were busy. I shouldn’t just-”

“Shh,” he put a gentle finger to your lips to keep you from rambling further, “I am never too busy for you and before you argue, you are never a bother. Besides, I didn’t have plans. Just maybe some patrolling, but it can wait.”

“You don’t have to put that off,” you insisted softly, “there are more important things out there than just me.”

Doubtful, he wanted to say. 

“I don’t mind-”

“Peter, I can just go home,” you promised, “or stay here if you don’t mind.”

“When have I ever minded?” he teased as you grinned sheepishly, “never. And I don’t mind now. Stay, please. You practically live here anyway, don’t act like some sort of stranger.”

“Okay,” you felt ready to cry again, “thank you.”

“Nothing to thank me for,” he insisted sweetly, “and you got lucky - I just washed and put on my clean sheets.”

“Ahhh, you’re my hero,” the idea of slipping into his warm bed with the smell of fresh laundry and pillows that always smelled like him was heavenly, “thank you, Peter. Will you…don’t be out too late?”

“You just want me for my warm body,” he playfully huffed but you grinned like the Cheshire cat, “all these years, I should have known.”

“It’s not my fault you’re a radiator,” you stuck your tongue out at him, “one of the many good things that came out of you being bitten by a radioactive spider.”

“Yeah, yeah,” he teased, “there’s some clean stuff for you in the dresser, okay? Are you sure you’ll be fine-”

“I’m sure, Pete,” before you could stop yourself or overthink it, you pressed a kiss to his cheek, “I’ll be okay if you promise me two things.”

“Anything.”

“Come home soon,” you pleaded softly, “and come home safe.”

“I always do,” you raised an eyebrow, silently reminding him of the many times he came home battered and bruised, “you know I’ll always come home to you.”

“I know,” you wondered if he picked up on how quickly your heart was suddenly beating; you were sure he did. You swallowed thickly before turning your face away, “I guess I’ll let you go then.”

“I’ll be back soon,” he promised, “I know it’s pointless to say, but don’t worry about me, sweetheart.”

“It is pointless,” you snorted in amusement, “but I’m just gonna go to bed and maybe watch a movie or something while you’re out.”

“Don’t wait up.”

“Again, pointless to say,” you were both well aware of that fact, “I’ll see you soon, Pete.”

“Soon, sweetheart.”

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Once he left, you padded to his bedroom and snuggled up in his bed, letting the warmth and familiar smell surround you. Nothing made you feel better and more at home than being in his bed. You helped yourself to a shower as you often did before rummaging through his drawer and picking a pair of his boxers and a sweater to put on. You felt so much better already, but then, that just proved that Matt had been right all along. You pushed that thought to the back of your mind as you cuddled up in his and turned on the TV. You knew you weren’t going to be able to focus on much so you turned on a show the two of you had seen a million times.

Despite your best efforts to stay awake, you were fast asleep in less than an hour. It was definitely the combination of warmth and comfort and the overwhelming feelings you were currently trying to process. 

Peter came back at a relatively early hour, deciding that things were quiet enough for him to go home. And honestly? He really just wanted to go home and see his favorite girl; his girl  - at least in his mind. His heart panged when he remembered the fact that you were unfortunately not his and likely never be his. But he could pretend, right? There was no harm in it. 

When he got home, landing on his firescape, he was ready to tap on the window to let you know he was back, but then saw that you were sleeping peacefully. A smile crossed his features as he quietly let himself in, landing on the floor with the softest thud. The boy made quick work of pulling off his mask before grabbing some pajamas out of his dresser and quickly changing in the bathroom. He thought about changing in the bedroom but didn’t want to give you a heart attack in case you woke up. Not that you hadn’t seen him shirtless about a million times before, but still. Peter was a gentleman.

Once he came back out, he walked to his side of the bed and watched you for a moment, taking in your small, light snores and even breathing. He pulled and blankets back before climbing into bed as quietly and gently as he could. Despite his best efforts, you made a small sound, “Peter?”

“It’s me,” he whispered, “‘m back. Just rest, sweetheart.”

He immediately felt the warmth of your body and he realized just how badly he wanted to hold you. Like really, really badly. You listened to him try and get comfortable while maintaining a proper distance and smiled to yourself, “can I ask you something?”

“You just did,” oh. You could practically feel the smile on the boy’s face, “but I guess you can ask something else.”

“Will you…will you cuddle me?” the shocked look on Peter’s face was something to behold. You let out a small little exhale before slowly turning around to face him. Even in the dark you could see the pretty flush on his cheeks, “you don’t have to if you don’t want to.”

“I want to,” he was quick to dispel any of your worries as he swallowed the lump in throat. He wanted nothing more, “I-I always want to.”

You hummed in content as you scooted closer to him and you felt him wrap an arm around you. Before you could say or do anything, he pulled you closer, causing you to bump noses and laugh softly, “you’re so warm.”

“You’re so soft,” he sounded like he was in awe as you tangled your legs with his, “so soft and delicate.”

“Peter,” you leaned into him and buried your face near his chest before closing your eyes again. Alright, this was definitely your favorite spot in the entire galaxy. You laughed despite your best efforts to stay away, “you smell ‘s good.”

“Oh yeah?” you felt him press a kiss to the top of your head, “so do you.”

You smiled to yourself as you let yourself get lolled back to sleep. A comfortable silence fell over the two of you as Peter tried to keep calm as you slept in his arms. He wanted to get some rest too, but found that it was almost impossible with how loud his thoughts were. He tried to ground himself with the feeling of you in his arms, along with your steady breathing. It all served to remind him just how deeply in love with you he was.

He laid there for a while, trying to figure out and process his own feelings. Eventually he ended up watching you, trailing his fingers over your cheek and along your jaw before sighing softly. How were you so pretty and soft and lovely and everything? It almost wasn’t fair. 

“I hope you know how much I love you,” he whispered into the dark, accompanied by a wistful little sigh, “maybe one I’ll actually be able to tell you.”

What he didn’t know was that you were awake as well, unable to fall asleep while you were in his touch. You tried to control your inhale, still contemplating if you should say anything or just let him think you were sleeping. But you were pretty sure that he might have just said the words you’d been wanting to hear for the years.

“Peter?” you whispered after a few moments, so softly that he almost didn’t hear it. But you could hear the small sound of surprise that he made, “I wasn’t fully honest when I told you that Matt broke up with me.”

“What do you mean?”

“He broke up with me because he said he wasn’t the one for me,” you could feel him watching you intently with baited breath, “he told me that I could never love him like he deserved to be loved because…because I was already in love with someone else.”

“O-oh.”

“Because I’m in love with you,” you confessed, finally getting it all out in the open, “because it’s so obvious.” 

Peter was silent for a few moments, his mind racing as he tried to figure out if you were being serious or just repeating what Matt had said. You pulled back so you could face him, reaching over and brushing some of his wild hair out of his face, “and he was right.”

“He was?” he asked softly, setting his hand on top of yours where it rested on his face, “sweetheart?”

“He was,” you promised, “it’s always been you, Peter. I just never thought that you’d feel the same. If I did-”

“I would have said something years ago,” he finished for you as you nodded, “me too. I…I feel so dumb. All this time…”

“It’s okay,” you insisted sweetly, “we’ve always had each other - and we always will. Now we can just…do all the other stuff too.”

“All the other stuff,” he teased and you laughed softly, a mixture of adoration and nerves, “hmm, you might have to tell me more. Just to make sure that we’re on the same page.”

“First of all,” you leaned in so your lips were almost brushing against each other, “like kissing, you know?”

“Does that mean I can kiss you?”

“I insist on it, Parker,” the two of you were grinning at each other like fools, “please.”

“What if I don’t want to stop?” you saw his Adam’s apple bobbing as he swallowed thickly. You worried your bottom lip between your teeth, a sight he was sure would kill him. He pulled you towards him, his large hand splaying on your waist as you stared at each other intensely. 

“Don’t,” you insisted softly, “don’t ever stop.”

[lemmetreatya]

BABES, DILF ONYANKOPAN PLS...

OHHHHHH OF COURSE!! ANYTHING FOR YOU SCHNOOKUMS!!

content: very soft, suggestive tones

dilf!onyankopon is a loving father to his kids and a beautifully affectionate husband to you. hes such a family oriented man and genuinely finds pleasure in working hard to provide for his family. 

dilf!onyankopon whos sometimes away for long times because of his work as a pilot, but he’s always making an effort to make up for his time away. 

dilf!onyankopon who loves setting up anything from pools to trampolines to swings to slides for the kids. he doesnt consider himself a handy man but give him a set of instructions or a youtube video and he works it out just fine. he will also not think twice about joining in with them when they ask him to.

“daddy, come play with us!” 

the loud giggles of children have been ringing within the backyard all day but its now that his oldest daughter calls out to him that he’s suddenly alerted by the call. 

“want me to come and beat you guys again, huh?” he grins widely. not that he cared about participating much, but its you he turns and gives a look to. 

can I? his eyes silently ask and you can only roll your eyes before nodding your head in their direction with a thick smile. 

“just make sure nobody come to me crying bout a pulled back or bumped head.”

dilf!onyankopon who absolutely will not mind throwing down onto the bbq. will take every opportunity to call the boys and their families round for a grill up as soon as there’s even a GLIMPSE OF SUN. uses the “Ive got everything but ____” trick on his friends so that he can get away with them all bringing the extra items and him just supplying the meat 💀💀💀

dilf!onyankopon likes letting you have moderate reign over his money. he isnt too fussed about what you spend it on but best believe he demands to see specific things that you buy. not so he can keep tabs, but so he can see how good things look on you.  

Onyankopon (ICE): Show me. 

You: show you what?

Onyankopon (ICE): Don’t try play with me. 

Onyankopon (ICE): Whatever you got at the lingerie store. I want to see. 

You: HOW????

You: you cctv’ing me now?! 🤨🤨🤨🤨🤨

Onyankopon (ICE): Bank notifications. 

Onyankopon (ICE): Now show me. I’m getting impatient. 

Onyankopon (ICE): Attachment 3

You: shiiiit???

Onyankopon (ICE): Exactly. So don’t keep me waiting. 

Onyankopon (ICE): Please. 

dilf!onyankopon whos a massive lover about the food you cook him. will never fail to compliment you on what you cook for him and is greatly appreciative of when you do. goes out his way to promote the kids to do the same

dilf!onyankopon who is absolutely infatuated with you regardless of your state — or his state, for that matter.

“how did i ever get so lucky with you?” 

the man continues to pepper kisses over your face. his main target is your lips but he seems to miss that spot occasionally. however, you’re careful not to push him away or act in opposition to his affection. drunk dilf!onyankopon a sappy man once upset. 

“baby, please go to sleep.” you whine once his mouth is off yours. 

“but i love you!” he says through a pout. “do you not love me too?”

“onyankopon, i love you too much to comprehend, but right now you’re wine drunk and need to go to sleep. you have work in the morning.” 

you place a hand lightly on his head and try lower him back down onto his own pillow but dilf!onyankopon makes a sound of resistance before springing upwards. 

“but im not tired! i have so much energy! with you by my side, i could conquer the world!”

“oh really?” you say with a raised eyebrow. “well, since you’ve got enough energy to conquer the world, you could start at home by mowing the lawn.”

as soon as you say those words, dilf!onyankopon suddenly plops his head onto the pillow, his cheek squished against it. 

“awe man, i feel so sleepy…” he fake yawns. 

[eimids]

Worst enemy part 2

Arsenal x reader

(Okay but leah in this photo is the cutest)

Warnings: talk about suicide, depression, but reader getting better

Words: around 2k?

You woke up in the comfortable bed. You didn’t want to open your eyes tho. You didn’t want to face the reality of life and yesterday’s events. So you just laid in there. You could feel Leah’s arm wrapped around you and her other hand stroking your hair.

Unbeknownst to you, Leah knew you were awake, she sensed the stiffness of your body when you woke up. She didn’t say anything because she wanted to take things at your pace.

The day before when you had asked for help, you cried in Leah’s arms for hours before falling asleep in her arms. Leah then sent some messages to Kim. They talked about contacting the team management and Jonas so they could get you the help you needed. Kim would sort all of that out for you so you didn’t have to stress about that.

“Good morning sweet girl” Leah said gently when she noticed you stirring.

“Mhmm” You just mumbled back. Not having the energy to actually answer. Leah understood though. She let you wake up slowly taking your time.

“Are you ready to wake up properly and talk about yesterday?” Leah asked after a while.

“Not really but I guess I’ll have to?” You answered after a while.

“Yea, I know it’s going to be hard for you but it’s for the best. Your gonna get the help you need to manage your depression and me and all of the other teammates will be here for you every step of the way” Leah said and continued stroking your hair. It made you a bit calmer.

“Wait do they all know about this?” You asked when Leah’s words settled in. You didn’t want all of them to know.

“No don’t worry. Even though they wouldn’t judge you about this. But no, Alessia was the first one to talk to me and Kim about this. Then Beth and Viv came to talk cause they were worried. Then lastly McCabe. They were all worried about your wellbeing and wanted to help. Others don’t know about your history with depression but most of them have noticed that something is going on with you.” Leah answered you. You just nodded your head. Not fully grasping everything that was said to you.

“So you know about what happened at Manu?” You asked quietly.

“Yeah, but that won’t change how I see you as a person. You are an amazing person and a fantastic footballer and your past doesn’t change it in the least” Leah answered trying to convince you.

“So what happens now?” You asked next after a silent moment.

“Well Kim has contacted the team management and they have called the psychiatrist at the team. You’re gonna have a meeting with her and they’ll probably want you to start medication and therapy again. That helped last time right?”

“Yeah it made things better for a while before it all fell apart again” You answered. Almost starting to cry again. Just so exhausted about everything.

Leah stayed quiet for a while before she asked you about what she was wondering all night.

“Where were you yesterday? We were all worried about you and I was really worried that you might have- um” Leah started but couldn’t say the words. She didn’t want to believe the chance that you left to kill yourself.

You stayed quiet. It seemed too hard to admit the things that were so dark. But then you started to explain

You started to explain how you had left the hotel in a very bad mental state. A state where you definitely shouldn’t have been alone. You didn’t know where you were going. Wandering around the streets. At one point you could hear sounds of a train. That grabbed your attention.

You were walking towards that noice. You didn’t know if you were actually going to jump in front of a train or was it just to calm you down. Just the thought that you could do it, made you feel better. You sat close to the rails for a while before hearing the next train coming. You pondered your options. You could do it and finally make everything stop. Or you could fight just like you did couple years ago.

The train came closer and closer before it went past you. Then you don’t even really remember how you ended back to the hotel.

“I’m sorry I didn’t mean to scare you or make you worried” You said while crying.

“You have nothing to apologize for. Now we’re going to get you some help.” Leah whispered.

Two weeks later you had started your medication and therapy. Your teammates kept their promises about being by your side during all this. Although the meds hadn’t yet started working, you were slowly getting better. Just having your teammates know about your situation and helping you with basic tasks like grocery shopping and cooking helped a lot.

Your therapist said that it would be the best if you didn’t live by yourself during this time so Alessia offered to take you living with her. She had a spare bedroom and wanted to look out for you. Leah, Viv or Beth (or all of them) would often come hang out with you since they couldn’t train properly yet due to their ACL injuries. Leah wasn’t much of a cook (or at all) but her company was nice. Even in those moments where I didn’t have energy to even talk she would just hug you and watch your favorite series. Viv loved to play board games with you. It was nice and quiet, just like you wanted. Beth was a mom, she made sure you always had something easy to eat and some water close by, she would even make sure you have taken your meds.

Some days were harder, some easier, sometimes you couldn’t get out of bed but someone was always there for you. You had been pulled out of training for at least a month before the meds would start working. After that you were allowed back on training if everything went well.

“Less can we go for a walk?” You asked your friend one night when it was just the two of you.

The older blonde was not expecting to hear that sentence from your mouth. You had barely had the energy to talk for a while and now you wanted to go for a walk. She was so happy that you were getting better again.

“Yeah of course we can! Let me just grab a hoodie and we can go. Do you need anything? Should you eat before we go?” Less started fussing over you.

“No i’m good, let’s just have a nice little walk” You answered her. And that you did. You went and got your favorite snacks to have a movie night. Although you ended up falling asleep head on her lap very soon after the movie started.

A Month later you were doing better again. You had more energy and were enrolled in training again. You weren’t yet playing at games and probably wouldn’t for a while but even getting back to just training was a big step for you.

Obviously your depression wasn’t cured and you still struggled but things were looking better for you.

“Y/l/n, come here you stupid” You heard Katie yell at you. You ran to her on the pitch with confused look.

“Why haven’t you told us that your birthday is in couple of weeks?” She asked you.

To be honest you weren’t sure in the beginning if you would make it to your twenties. You completely forgot about your birthday trying to just get better.

“Oh I haven’t even realized” You answered half truthfully.

“Well we gotta celebrate! Oh we’re going to have a big party for you! Lotte! Let’s throw a party” She yelled and ran to Lotte. It made you laugh. A real laugh. You hadn’t laughed in a while and actually been happy without feeling guilty about it. Now you were just enjoying the moment with your teammate on the pitch.

“I’m so happy she’s getting better” Leah said to the blonde next to her.

“Me too, I have been so worried about her getting better and now that she has I just feel so relieved” Alessia said back. They smiled to each other before walking to you.

“We’re proud of you kid, you’ve come a long way”

—

I don’t know if this is a bit boring ending but what ever.

[nohoney]

bae now you're LEGALLY required to write something about c&c touya and reader taking care of their newborn. my heart ACHES

legally required you say (￢‿￢ )

Touya remembers the days of rolling out of bed from being out late at night, his body still exhausted and his head pounding with a hangover, needing more sleep, needing food in his stomach, and needing coffee and a smoke after a tiring night.

He’d go out to the balcony, light up a cigarette and inhale nicotine in between sips warm coffee.

The pairing he still believes is the best and can’t be topped.

He still drinks coffee but he’s given up the smoking, and instead of looking out at the balcony, now he looks out into the small backyard of the house you and him bought together. His body is exhausted after the long nights he’s had, but instead of being disgruntled by it, Touya holds no resentment.

Not with his newborn son being the reason why he’s tired.

“What’s with the face? You grumpy, hm? Got a bad attitude in the morning just like your mum?” Touya speaks to his son in his arms, fascinated with how his baby looks so curious but sometimes scrunching his little face like he doesn’t understand something. “Or maybe you’re making that face because you want her instead?”

Speaking of which, you shuffle out into the living room, pulling your arms through a cardigan and stifling a yawn. “There’s my boys,” you announce with a tired smile, “whatcha doing?”

“Nothing much, I was talking to him about his face. He was looking kinda pissed for a little.” Touya walks away from the sliding doors, carefully transferring his son into your arms and helping you sit down on the couch. His son makes a squirmy little sound but recognizes that he’s with his mother, turning his head when you coo over him.

It makes Touya feel sappy to see this before him, but he knows that once there’s crying or a soiled nappy, the feeling will momentarily leave until the baby is all settled.

“Gonna brew some coffee. You want your tea?” Touya offers and is given a little affirming hum from you, “You want breakfast too?”

“Yeah, I’m hungry.”

There’s been very little energy to cook since bringing the baby home. Touya remembers the second day wanting to make eggs but his body was too exhausted from staying up with you as you breastfed your baby in the early hours of the morning and then falling asleep when his son was full. Your mom was right to suggest prepping meals ahead of time and freezing them.

While the coffee brews, Touya is warming a frozen meal into a pot. He smells the coffee in the air and he sighs a little wistfully; he misses the cigarettes. Not even the little vape that he used as a substitute was touched after you reached your third trimester. The routine of stepping outside for a smoke was dearly missed.

He’s got your favorite mug filled with hot tea as he approaches you in the living room, only to find you sniffling and weeping a little. He was told that baby blues are normal and has been keeping vigilant whenever you have these moments.

“Doll? What’s wrong?” He asks you gently, putting the cup on a coaster first. Three days after bringing the baby home, you had burst into tears when Touya had put your cup of water down on the coffee table without a coaster, unreasonably lamenting about water rings on the wood.

You wipe at your tears and sniffle first, letting out an embarrassed laugh before telling him, “I don’t know. I told you I was hungry and then all of a sudden I felt like I wasn’t hungry, but I could already hear you warming up the food in the kitchen. And then I just started spiraling about how I was wasting your time making breakfast that I’m not even sure I wanted anymore.”

He leans over to kiss your forehead, murmuring that it’s okay but most like you are hungry and that he’ll take the baby so that you could eat in peace.

By the time you’re finished eating, you do feel better and your son starts getting a little squirmy to indicate that it’s his turn. You make yourself comfortable in the armchair and unfasten the strap to your top, sighing when your son latches at your nipple and talking softly as he’s fed. “Hey, no nodding off just yet. Gotta make sure your tummy’s full so that you can sleep.”

It’s been about nine days since the baby has been home, and it almost feels surreal to Touya that almost every conversation you and him have had together centers around the baby boy. Talking about things like the little hairs on his head, how he blinks, the way he seems to recognize Touya’s music when it’s played, and having whole conversations about what’s considered normal inside of a nappy. When your sister and her husband spoke of their own daughter when she was a newborn, Touya couldn’t really understand the fascination that they had.

Now he gets it.

[lovebvni]

“what’s stopping me?” (pap)

what’s holding up your manifestations from coming to fruition?

it’s a common question i got throughout the intuition readings. and i remember asking myself the same thing. one thing i want to preface with is nothings stopping you. the 3D is just lagging. it’s usually just how you feel that’s wondering what’s stopping you!

but in this pick a picture, we will be diving into what’s stopping your manifestations, and how to get over them in order to receive everything you want and more!

please note the phrases/alt text for each pile will have little to nothing to do with the pile you choose. do not let it affect your decision.

disclaimer, this pick a pile is not legal advice or anything like that. you can take everything with a grain of salt, because not every fact will apply to you. do not take my words as final say, as anything can change.

inhale, exhale, and let your intuition flow. now click 'keep reading' and select an image from down below. (be sure to look at the image description !!)

all image credits to their rightful owners. if you know any of them, please lmk.

Pile I — Flower Body

hello pile 1!! i hope ur doing well :) im wishing u the best!

whats holding you back is the material and ONLY focusing on it. nile heard “sitting on your laurels/hands.”

youre allowing urself to sink into the quicksand and not doing anything to fight it… when there’s a branch right in front of you to grab onto…?

like… why just sit there and do nothing when there’s something you can do? you may be stuck in your own mind, honestly. just breaking yourself down, over and over again — only allowing yourself to believe what is in front of you. you don’t trust the whimsy, you don’t trust the signs. your motto is “if i don’t see it, it isn’t real.”

im going to break the news to you, pile one, if you keep this mindset nothing is going to come to you instantly. and i hope that motivated you to stand up and do SOMETHING, because doing nothing isn’t helping.

your advice from spirit is connect with your emotions to better yourself. don’t allow this depression to gain the best of you. another thing is allow your imagination to flow — even if you don’t see it right now.

sociopath by stay loose and bryce fox came on.

i feel like you’re like “it hasn’t worked in the past, it isn’t working now, so it can’t work in the future.” which is NOT true at all. let the vast be the past, do what you can in the present to shape your future. don’t look in the rear view mirror when driving. don’t let someone else grab the wheel when you’re driving — this is YOUR car. YOUR journey. do it, and don’t let the 3D, your thoughts or ur doubts get in the way of it. run them over.

that’s all pile 1, please take care of urself and don’t listen to the voices telling you to give up — i promise it will get easier.

extra signs/confirmation : “drive. DRIVE DRIVE!”, “they’re in the past”, someone who shuts down when things get hard, scorpio, “loser/loner”, may have been bullied/put down before, not moving because you’re scared of the chain reaction, not understanding that the past is done, “quit looking at the material. it ain’t shit, bitch.”, “don’t trust everything you see!”, shifttok, complicated methods, potential, sitting on your ass, taking the punches, allowing yourself to be destroyed, crying.

Pile II — See No Evil

hii pile 2!! i hope you’re doing well!! wishing u the best :p

for your energy, we pulled 10 of swords — which isn’t that great of a start — but at least it gives us some information. you’re someone who feels burnt out, tired, stressed and neglected. nile got a similar energy, saying she “felt a self-relinquished energy. Feeling small weak, diminished, low-power, half-effort smiling. They know things are less than okay. Telling themselves/pretending to appear to others that they're not as shaken about things being stale and scarce as they are actually feeling inside.”

you’re not reflecting your true self, which is really self-demeaning. you’re limiting yourself by hiding yourself. and maybe you’re being forced into a box — and i am being too!! find a way to cut a small hole out the box and get the fuck out without anyone noticing. find yourself, even if you just need to sit there and breathe for a while. sometimes that’s all you need to do — find one thing you love.

whats holding you back seems to be obsession, and we pulled queen of pentacles combined with 3 of swords. that’s insane.. maybe obsession of a past love?

get off their social media, block them, they don’t matter! they are not ur partner anymore. if ur friends, our distance between you two. not separate yourself fully, just take a step back. don’t let them be a huge part of ur life, they aren’t anymore. i feel like this is the reason you shut down, the reason you’re repressing yourself now. maybe they were ur out, your sense of joy.

i remember a quote i saw a long time ago, “to have a healthy relationship, there must be self love and love of the other person (or people) involved.” you wed to distance yourself and find some love for urself before u do anything else.

to get other this, you need to be angry in a way. you need to finally stand up and walk out. this isn’t serving you anymore. you need to stop. don’t let this control you. stop letting it control you. i keep hearing “get out, get out, get out.” which is scary. you’re not trapped, pile 2. you can get out. just stand up and walk out — or i’d TRULY that simple.

i love you pile 2, please work for urself and not other people.

extra signs/confirmation: “the final straw”, finally stepping out the box, red, repetition, affirming, false belief, not standing up for yourself, vomiting, crying a LOT, keeping things to yourself, looking outwardly, not confirming with yourself, needing to take a leap of faith, 999, “hopeless and helpless”, “BULLSHIT!”, “gone”.

Pile III — Black Mirror

hellooo pile 3!!! how are you??!! i hope ur well!!

your energy feels “convoluted yet diluted.” there’s so much going on, but somehow it’s so watered down and so deep down. like you can’t find yourself, because the there’s so much going on around you. it’s like you’re just caught in a tornado — being mixed in with all the mess.

im so sorry pile 3. i really hope it gets better, but let’s get onto the reading. what’s limiting you is the way you’re overworking yourself. and honestly, the solution is to work through it. keep going pushing, keep working, and don’t stop.

this is something that you are going to have to power through. the song that came on is paralyzed by nf. i’m going to link it

it’s such a touching song, i used to listen to it a lot. you’re stuck in what feels like a cycle. you don’t feel like yourself. you don’t know why, but it’s because you’re currently in a state where you HAVE to work through this. it isn’t gonna last much longer, but whenever you can take a break.

don’t overwhelm yourself, but also don’t always step back. don’t forget what you need to do. always work as hard as you can, but do not neglect yourself. and i know that is SUCH a hard reading and a complicated situation, but you will find it. you will find the balance, the key. it will work out. i’m rooting for u, pile 3.

extra signs/confirmation: chaotic life, in school or uni, being really tired, neglecting work, working long hours, not prioritizing time, sad rap, lil peep, black jacket, hopeless, helpless, not allowing yourself to find a solution, finding distractions, never doing what needs to be done until the last minute, “why is nothing working?” hyper fixating on self-pleasure and manifestation instead of what also needs to be done.

Pile IV — To See

hello pile 4! i hope you’re doing well! i feel the need to mention that ive been seeing 444 a lot, but 🤷🏽‍♀️🤷🏽‍♀️

your energy is every much “the knight in shining armor”, the one who always wants to save and help others — usually neglecting themselves in the process. you stand up for those being bullied, possibly because you were bullied in the past and feel for them. you don’t want people to be broken down like you (and i relate so much — this pile lowkey feels like a callout)

your issue is that you’re holding onto the past, and allowing it to control you. u may say “i let go of that a long time ago”, well there’s a part you’re holding onto and you know it. i feel like exposure therapy may be good for you — ask someone you trust to put you in a similar situation and try to react now. like not as you were, but as you are.

spirit is saying to get over this, you must find balance and peace within yourself. you may have never gotten an apology, never gotten help, or never opened up, but you need to seek it now. cut off the past. it isn’t your friend — and it will not change. don’t allow acknowledgment to take control of you. knowing is not accepting.

that’s all i have for u pile 4!! i hope all goes well, and after you get over this and find balance, i feel like it’s going to come to you immediately. you may not even know you got out the situation!

song bc i forgot to do it earlier 💀💀

extra signs/confirmation: aries, ray of sunshine, false energy (putting our positive energy although you are feeling negatively — specifically got a visual of golden/yellow energy with grey in the center), yellow energy, spontaneous, growth is required, growth is coming, pain, ribs (?), getting over an ex, boys a liar (original).

what’s limiting you is your need for control ALL THE TIME

Pile V — Death’s Harvest

hello pile 5! i hope you’re doing well!! this is probably one of the most intense piles based off the name, but we’ll see!! your energy is very much “i’m in control, i am the man” with king of cups coming out. also kinda getting u have ur head in the clouds, and you don’t rlly see things as they are, but as u want them to be.

what’s limiting you is your need for control. you want it took much, so you have decided “i’ll just ignore everything i don’t like!” which isn’t good. you have to acknowledge the things you don’t like and find a way to change them. don’t just ignore them — stop trying to deny thing are bad? because they ARE.

to get out of this energy, you need to clear the plate. literally. you nee to decide “this isn’t fo me, i’m not having it.” and dump the table. i feel like you know how to do this, but you won’t. decide to do it, stop carrying what you don’t need. very clear message, pile 5!!! i hope all goes well :)

extra signs/confirmation: “i cleaned the plate” (u threw it in the trash), talkative guides, yapper, lots of love. your guides love you, but they really need you to know that this isn’t for you., braggy, injury (smth w a p), health issues, tiara, “homosapien, homosexual”, devil town by cavetown.

Pile VI — Earth’s Hello

hi pile 6!! you guys have such a calming energy, i must say, and i love it. i get an image of blue and green, obviously in relationship to earth. you may he a motherly figure, or someone that people can talk to easily.

what’s holding you back is “bitching and moaning, but not working.” you want things to work, but you won’t take that action. you want something, but all you do is sit and wait for it to happen. it’s like sitting at a bus stop but never standing up to get on the bus.

you’re letting yourself rot. your potential is draining out of you second by second. and i don’t think it’s truly because youre lazy or burnt out, but it’s out of confusion. dont know what to do, but because of that, you wont do anything. if you’re confused, ask for help, dont just decide to give up.

your advice is to cut down your options and hyper focus on ONE activity. don’t allow everything in your mind to jumble up at once, give yourself space to work and think. you can’t sit there forever and expect your manifestations to just fall in your lap when you don’t even have hope.

extra signs/confirmation: i felt like blood in my throat? it smelled like blood and it kinda hurt on my left side, babies, pointy shoes, TV by billie eilish, paralysis, overwhelmed, “you’ve got this!”, babies (again), not working when you need to, 777, the letter T.

Pile VII — All Seeing Cat

hii pile 7! let’s get straight in. your energy can be very calming. you’re a hard working and you work until you get the rewards. you’re not someone who gives up — you hold on until the end. u know that there’s a cycle, a method, and a way to get through it. although it hurts, you continue to push through! that’s so good!! i’m so proud of u pile 7! also you got 7 of pentacles for ur energy. which i think is kinda 777 bc of pile 7 yk but wtv. i also js saw 777!!

your limitation is your emotion and your need for emotional and even romantic attention. i feel like this so something you struggle with on and off — and so do i 😭😭 i asked for a song for clarification, and got mad hatter by melanie martinez.

you’re not in the best mindset and you know this! so why do you keep trying to go after this romantic attraction? push back these feelings, pretend they aren’t there — because they aren’t serving you. the right person will come when you need them.

for now, rely on friends and family rather than romantic interest. like i told pile 2(i think) slowly distance yourself, don’t just cut them off.

extra signs/confirmation: the colour purple, alice in wonderland (obviously), cups cards, emotional, back and forth, mood swings, “emotional wreck”, confused, “need for validation, delusions, center of attention, “attention whore.”

Pile VIII — New Awakening

hiii pile 8!!! 8 is the number of balance, and that’s what i’m praying for this year — balance and fulfillment. your energy is very joyful — you possibly have a yellow aura. but along with this yellow, you feel very alone. you feel distant from everyone — like you have nobody to talk to, nothing to do.

pile 8, you are not alone. you need to surrender these feelings to move forward — confide in someone. be straight up and honest. don’t hold it back anymore — TELL SOMEONE.

twisted by missio came on (cringy ass song, iykyk) and i feel like you may be saying “well they already know, so they won’t help. but they may not know the extent of it. really sit them down and talk them through it, because if you just keep it inside it’s going to be harder.

spirit is also saying “complete the goals you’ve set for yourself”. you may possibly be a fighter and you have a LOT you want to do. finish those things before deciding to move on. it could also be confirmation that your maifestations may come in before you even really confide in someone — because it could be a multiple day process.

extra signs/confirmation: gacha life (💀💀), confusion, bottled up emotions, loniness, depression, black sphere, the colour blackc, “how do i get out of here?”, spirals, 333, energetic and outgoing person, not taking yourself seriously, “do you guys ever think about dying? “ — barbie, “i can be everything i want to be!”, barbie, childhood dreams, online friends, life of the party, friendly, feeling like a fake friend, dance the night from barbie.

Pile IX — Life from Death

hi pile 9!! lotta true crime by penelope scott came on as i was finishing pile 8, and i felt like that was important to mention. the intro beat has been stuck in my head for the past few days so!! you may listen to a lot of true crime too!! lmao

you don’t have a solid sense of self, and ie always seems to be changing. from your world view to the way you style your hair — you’re having issues finding yourself. you may have traveled the world, seen so much, and heard so many opinions, but you don’t know where you fit in. you’re everywhere but nowhere, like 9 — that’s what you think. you’re lost with yourself.

when i asked for what’s limiting you, it’s the mindset that “this isn’t for me anymore.. it isn’t worth it.” it that’s literally because you feel like you don’t have any control. you do have control, pile 9. you just have to find the areas in which you do — don’t be self destructive.

oh ana by mother mother also came on and i feel like that may be an important song to this pile.

your advice is exactly what i said — find places which you have power over. do you like painting? paint what you feel!! don’t act like nothing is going your way — and if it is, THEN MAKE IT.

that’s all i have for u pile 9!

extra signs/confirmation: mother mother, red and orange, fire, childhood, death, being lonely, recent breakup, night to day, dancer/just dance, afraid, sick, vomiting, elita.

i hope you enjoy this pap!! i really hope this resonates and works out. i am hoping the best for each and every pile — and i pray that everything works out. no matter if it takes days or years — it will happen. i promise. i am living proof.

much love, abyss.

[jjtheresidentbaby]

yk how reid is heavily autistic coded? (might be canon i cant remember) maybe little reader having a meltdown and/or sensory issues and spencer understanding and helping them?

Too Much | Spencer Reid x Reader

a/n: I am not officially diagnosed with autism so if I’ve gotten anything incorrect please let me know and I’ll immediately fix it. this also got so much less agere then I intended it to be

warnings: sensory overload, anxiety, stimming, reader going non-verbal, crying, mentions of Reid & reader being autistic

───°˖✧✿✧˖° ───

-

It was too much, everything was too much. There’s the buzzing of the board Garcias presenting on, the click of the clock on the wall, Emily tapping her pen relentlessly against the round table, Rossi keeps looking at you and you don’t know why- everything is too much.

“Y/n?” You startle at Reid’s soft voice from your left, his expression just as gentle as his voice.

“Y- yeah?” You mange but just barely, talking feels like so much work and especially with your little space clawing at your mind.

“You okay?” You huff at Spencers concern, why would he think you’re not okay? Even if you feel like running out of this room, you have to be okay, you have to stay calm and organized at work, it’s the rules.

The rules you have made up for yourself as you’ve seen how your team can lose it a little bit, how they’re so open to be who they are around one another, but that’s not you. You are collected and treated with respect, not someone that freaks out over Emily’s pen hitting the table over, and over, and over and-

“Please stop doing that!” You shout, tears springing to your eyes when you realize that you just yelled at Prentiss. Her face is one of shock as she drops her pen quickly against the table, you clasp a hand over your mouth in horror, you can’t believe you just yelled at Emily, one of your best friends.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to get so upset- I’m sorry, it’s just- I um- I can’t- it’s-.” You give up on trying to explain yourself and instead slide down to the floor.

This is unprofessional, you note, but it’s helping the slightest bit. Helping the buzz of stimulation die down just the smallest possible amount when you start to rock in place, tucking your head into your knees and wrapping your arms around yourself in hopes that none of your harmful stims come out.

“Hey, can you look at me?” Reid appears in front of you, he helps block out some of the light and you can recognize that the team must have left with how little murmurs there are.

“There you are. Feel like you can talk?” You give a hesitant nod, of course you can talk, physically, it just might take all of your energy right now, Spencer seems to understand this as he hums along.

“Okay, you don’t have to. Is it too sensory overloading in here?” A firm nod as yes, yes that’s exactly it, he gets it.

“We can go somewhere quieter if you’d like, I’m sure Em wouldn’t mind giving us her office for a bit.” Oh god Emily’s probably so mad at you, she’s probably writing you up for yelling at coworkers, for having an outburst during the work day, she’s probably-

“Hey don’t do that, everything’s okay and Prentiss totally understands. Trust me, I’ve done worse than yell at her when I was overstimulated.” You cock your head at Reid, you’ve never seen him in a state of overstimulation or ever heard him mention things of the sort.

“I’m autistic, the team knows and I figured it was time you did too.” A weight lifts off your chest, Spencer smiles when the tension drops from your shoulders. You quickly point to yourself, hoping Spencer will understand that you’re also autistic.

“You are too? I gotta tell Garcia, she made me a whole sensory toy basket when I told her, I’m sure she’d do the same for you.” You smile to Spencer, the buzzing isn’t so bad now, there’s no eyes on you that you don’t want there and everything seems to be calming down.

Though your little headspace is coming in strongly, as it does after meltdowns or shutdowns, it gives your body a way to recharge. Work isn’t an ideal location for your regression, pushing it away doesn’t seem to be working either.

“Let’s go to Em’s office.” Spencer must pick up on something shifting in you since he offers his hand up for you to grab, something you know he doesn’t do often, you take it gratefully and let him lead the two of you down to Prentiss’ empty room.

-

“Now nobody can come bother us.” Spencer smiles over his shoulder, triple checking that the office is locked and it’s just you two.

“Do you need anything? Sometimes Garcia will put a show on her laptop for me when I’m coming down from a meltdown, I can go grab my computer if you want. Or I have a few books in my bag.” He starts to rummage around in his satchel, pulling out four books that have all been throughly read through based off how worn out they are.

“Wanna read one?” Your headspace doesn’t feel nearly big enough to read one of those books, the font is too small, pages filled with so many words that you can’t even pronounce correctly on a good day.

“I’ll read to you.” Reid decides when you just stay silently staring down at the books.

He gets situated in the corner of Emily’s couch quickly, sifting through the books til he finds one he thinks is the best choice, then Spencer opens up an arm for you. It takes a second before you fully comply, you know Reid isn’t huge on physical touch, but he lets you settle into his side.

“Chapter one…” Spencer begins, you lay happily against him, no more anxiety in your chest, all you feel is security in Reid’s arms as you listen to his soft voice.

[mouschiwrites]

HI POOKS!! So like this idea popped into my head so if it's alright with you could you do hc's for Ninjago where the ninja have a s/o who gets brain washed during a mission and is forced to fight their partner. (one of the ninja) To make it interesting, when the reader is brainwashed they say really hurtful things but the ninja have to keep it together because they know the reader doesn't mean it. At the end, when the reader is back to normal the ninja of that scenario tells the reader about everything(and what they said) and the reader feels guilty which leaves the ninja of that scenario telling them that it's fine and they're just happy the reader is safe. Hopefully that made sense thank you so much pookie!!❤️‍🩹❤️‍🩹

Me when you 💖

Anyway teehee here you go!!

Ninjago - Ninjas When You Get Brainwashed

Kai

When you attacked him, he thought you were just being playful

Bad timing, considering you were on a mission, but not exactly alarming

You guys love to play fight and banter, so it took him a minute to realize that something was wrong

It was the look in your eyes that gave you away; there was no humor, no affection, nothing but rage behind those e/c irises

"You hit like a toddler! And you look like one, too, with that stupid spiky hair!"

Kai felt his heart twist at each insult

Knowing that you weren’t joking around made the words lose their hilarity

It also made him hesitant to fight you back; he didn't want to exacerbate whatever was going on here

So he just tried his best to dodge, blocking the blows he wasn't quick enough to evade

He asked you what was wrong, but only received more degrading remarks in response

Your incessant attacks with no acknowledgment for anything he said or did clued him in on the true nature of your behavior

Realizing you were brainwashed, he refocused his energy to thinking of a way to snap you out of it

Only one idea came to his mind; it was stupid, it was risky considering you were trying to kill him, but it was all he had

He stopped dodging you, letting you lunge at his throat

As you dove in, he grabbed your collar and pulled you in for a kiss

At first he felt you resisting, but he held on, and gradually you melted into his touch

When you pulled away, the hatred in your eyes had disappeared

You put your hand over your mouth, disgusted at your actions

“Kai, I’m so sorry! I think I got brainwashed—I didn’t mean any of that.”

“Don’t worry about it, my flower. Nothing I haven’t seen from you before, right? I’m just happy you’re in your right mind again.”

You smirked at his remark, leaning in to peck his cheek

He took your hand, rubbing his thumb over your knuckles

“Come on, we’ve got a mission to finish.”

Jay

Jay shrieked when you pounced on him

He knew right away that something was wrong

You’d never do this; not to him

And the words you used… completely out of character

You and Jay were always sweet to each other, even when you were teasing

So your sudden barrage of insults and blows was much more than strange

Being a science fiction nerd, he guessed that you’d been brainwashed first try

He wasn’t serious when he thought of it at first, but he quickly realized that this was the only logical explanation

He couldn’t think of anything else that would cause you to act like this so suddenly

Mostly because he was preoccupied running from you and trying not to cry as you degraded him

He refused to lay a hand on you; no matter how brutish you were with him, he was determined not to hit back

So he just ran

Eventually you backed him into a corner

Your taunts were just getting annoying at this point—now that Jay had processed that it wasn’t really you, they just seemed redundant

You walked closer, slowly, talking all the while

"Tch, look at you... I can't believe I ever agreed to date you! Look at how pathetic you are!"

Jay’s hands balled into fists as he only got angrier

When you got within range, his body moved on its own

He clocked you on the side of the head, hard

You stumbled to the ground, and Jay gasped as he realized what he had done

“Y/n! Y/n, are you okay? Oh my stars, I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to—”

“…Jay? Oof, what ha… oh. Oh no. Jay, honey, I’m the one who should be apologizing! I didn’t mean any of that! Oh, sweetheart, are you okay?”

You brought yourself up to a sitting position, cupping Jay’s face in your hands and examining it with concern

You knew that he could be sensitive, and considering what you just did… you were on the verge of panicking

He just closed his eyes, leaning into your touch with a soft smile

“I didn’t listen. I knew it wasn’t you. You’d never do that to me. I’m so glad you’re back, Y/n.”

Cole

Your relationship with Cole is fairly stable; you rarely have disputes because you're both pretty easygoing, which means you're willing to accommodate/compromise before any conflict arises

The minute you attacked him, screaming hurtful words, he knew that something was up

He tried asking what was wrong, but only got a kick to the shin in response

Luckily he’s a pretty sturdy guy, so he stood his ground, blocking your attacks while trying to speak to you

“Y/n! Just—ow—tell me what’s wrong!”

He was really trying to be patient with you, but it was a little difficult with each new soon-to-be bruise planted on his body

His waning patience combined with the knowledge that you were on a mission eventually motivated him to restrain you

He wrapped his arms around you tightly, pinning your arms to your sides and lifting you off the ground

“Let me go, you… piggish brute! You unlovable barbarian! Release me!!”

“Not until you tell me what’s wrong!”

He squeezed tighter with every insult, eventually forcing the breath out of your lungs

You went quiet for a few moments, and that’s when he finally decided to put you down

You stumbled, having almost just fainted, but he caught you in his arms

With your body in his lap, Cole brushed a strand of hair away from your face

“Can you please tell me what’s going on now, my love?”

“Cole… I think I was brainwashed. I’m sorry, I… I can’t believe myself—”

“Not another word. That makes sense, actually. I’m just relieved that you weren’t mad at me or something. And I’m glad that you’re safe now, of course.”

He kissed your forehead, lifting you bridal style, making you giggle

He planted you on your feet and interlaced your fingers before nodding forward, urging you to follow him to complete your mission

Zane

You hadn't even said or done anything and Zane was able to detect that subtle difference

He didn't know what it was at first, so he prepared himself for anything as you ran at him

Judging your behavior, he quickly determined that you must've been brainwashed

The only trouble now was figuring out how to bring you back to reality

There were a hundred ways he could think of to un-brainwash someone... but which one would work?

"I don't know why I ever thought I could love you. You're a robot! You try to act human, but you'll never be like me. You'll never be enough for me."

This particular insult shook him out of his thoughts

The pain in his heart stunned him just long enough for you to pounce, pinning him to the ground

But as he fell, he reminded himself that this wasn't really you; the words that fell from your lips weren't your own

Now that pain bubbled into rage; you were being controlled, and you didn't deserve that

"Get. Out. Of. Their. Head!"

With a sudden burst of strength, Zane launched you off of him, switching your positions

Now, having you pinned, Zane glared into those hateful eyes

You entered a staring—no, glaring—contest

Gradually, as Zane squinted harder, gritted his teeth tighter, he saw your eyes soften

Eventually they fluttered shut for a moment, and when they opened again he knew you were back

His face immediately lit up, and he beamed at you

You smiled back as it all returned to your memory

"Thank you, Zane. I hope you know I didn't mean anything I said."

"Yes, yes. I'm only glad you're safe."

"Good. ...Uh, can you get off me now?"

Both blushing furiously, you scrambled to your feet

Zane awkwardly (but much to your relief) changed the subject by prompting you to return to your mission

Lloyd

You and Lloyd always talked things out when you had problems

You never took to petty insults during these talks, either

So when you came barreling at him, cursing him like an evil sorcerer, he knew something was up

At first he tried asking you what was wrong, but seeing that his words didn't register, focused instead on dodging your attacks

As he jumped around, avoiding your mechanically fast-paced blows, he noticed a strange look in your eye

It was as if a mask of hatred had been plastered on your face, and the real you was trapped behind it

Keep in mind this was a very slow realization; Lloyd had to divide his attention between dodging your hits, blocking out your words, and trying to figure out what was going on

In the time it took him to figure this out, you had worn yourself out quite a bit

Your breathing was heavy and ragged, and your form was becoming sluggish

Lloyd was losing energy too, but not quite as quickly

He decided to keep dodging until you wore yourself out

When your punches became slow and weak enough to bear, Lloyd stopped his agile movements and planted himself square in front of you

At this point, you were so tired that your punch to his chest was a mere touch, a brush of the knuckles against his green gi

"You... worthless... wannabe..."

He cupped your face, staring deep into your eyes, trying to get a glimpse of the real you inside

"Y/n."

The sound of your name stirred something in those dull, disdainful eyes

He said it again, softer now, and the mask broke

"Lloyd."

"Y/n. You're safe now. It's okay."

You slumped against him, murmuring apologies into his shoulder as he smoothed your hair

As much as he wanted to let you recover, he needed your help to finish the mission

He held out his elbow, earning a smirk from you as you placed your hand in the crook of it, allowing him to escort you forward

Nya

She was NOT having it

The very first insult you spat sent her into a rage almost rivaling yours

"Still can't believe they let a girl like you on the team. I mean, talk about a weak link!"

"Excuse me?!"

Her rage blinded her, and she fully engaged you in combat

You were both fighting with everything you had, making quite the commotion

Insults and fists flying, you'd never guess that you guys were actually dating

The thought occurred to Nya only after she had bested you, pinning you to the ground with her knee on the back of your neck

Still angry, she demanded to know why you did it

The fighting had disoriented you, shaking the effects of the brainwashing for just a second

"Nya, I... Gah! Get off me, brat!"

It was brief, but she saw you fighting to get out

Realizing at once what was going on, guilt flooded Nya's conscience

But she didn't let you go just yet

"Come on, Y/n! Fight it!"

"Stupid! Stupid stupid stupid—stupid brainwashing..!"

"Y/n? Is that you?"

"Yes. Yes, it's me. Oh, Nya, I'm so sorry..."

"I think we should both be a little sorry. I shouldn't have jumped you like that without thinking. But I'm glad you're back; you're a fighter."

You smiled at her when she offered her hand to help you up

Still holding her hand, you pulled her into a quick kiss

"We both are. Which reminds me... Shall we get back to the mission?"

Thanks for reading! And thanks to the sweet anon for this request! Take care loves <33

(divider by saradika)

[coralinnii]

You don’t have to do this right away but Part two for idia? Its okay if you dont feel like doing it, just remember to rest and take breaks!

"If you are a villain, then let me be your accomplice"  feat: Idia genre: drama notes: sequel to “being reincarnated into a new world as the bad guy” Idia ver., roughly 1.2k word count, mentions of blo*d, d*ath, and life-threatening situations, is there a gn equivalent of a himbo? cuz slight himbo!reader energy, unspecified beasts,

Finally, it’s here! The long-awaited villain/ess au sequel to the final housewarden (sorry Idia and Idia simps). Admittedly, this is not so much romantic as more fleshing out of their story :p whoops. I might make a continuation of the aftermath of this but I felt like this is a decent stopping point for now. 

Since accepting his growing feelings with you, Idia has been on an emotional roller coaster where he likes being around you but being around you makes him nervous to the point of almost puking. He finds himself glowing, both metaphorically and literally whenever you drop by and it doesn’t help when you seem to enjoy his personal space, seeing as you always bring yourself into said space. 

He knew that if he voiced his discomfort, you would make your best effort to distance yourself but the mere idea of that doesn’t make him feel too happy either. He’s grown accustomed to seeing your eyes sparkle at his new innovations, your warmth as you scoot closer to him on the couch, your voice when you share your random thoughts and questions

“Have you ever dreamt of your own death?” 

Ok, maybe he’s not too accustomed to everything you say

For a while now, you’ve experienced dreams that seem to burn themselves into your memories, forcing you to remember every detail as though the world compels you to. These dreams showed you snippets of life that seemed so real and scarily bears similarity to the real world. Your dreams foretold events in the near future which used to scare you to the point you begged your siblings to stay with you at night, assuring you it meant nothing. 

In truth, you wondered if you were given a strange and powerful gift but one thing about your visions stopped that train of thought. In your dreams, you tend to behave and act in ways you never would. The you in these dreams was spoiled and mean, especially to the Shroud family which you could never bring yourself to do in a million years. Because of that, you assumed your strange visions to be your imagination going wild. An alternative reality that didn’t happen.

But for the past few weeks, you were visioning your terrible end taking place in an expedition alongside your brother. You saw yourself perish at the hands of a feral beast with your brother then seeing your sister cry over your body and proclaiming to avenge your deaths, believing it to be the doing of the Shroud family. 

“What a strange dream, right?” You laughed in hopes to play off the absurdity of it all. “It’s just that…I've been seeing that dream more often now. I guess I’m more nervous about the expedition than I realise”

If it were someone else, you may have been considered strange or even going crazy. You thought Idia would see you that way or at best, try to convince you that it was nothing more than a wild fantasy, like your family does. 

But Idia was not a typical man. 

To be fair, you were not a typical person to him either. If it were anyone else, Idia wouldn’t care less about their troubles or at best, do the bare minimum to get them off his back. But it was the person who unknowingly stole his heart and watching you visibly affected by your disturbing visions persuaded him to seriously consider your words. 

“Tell me everything you saw” 

And lucky he did.  

Your father taught you a lot of things. How to swing your sword with gusto, to grit your teeth and dig in your heels when anticipating a blow, and to stand your ground no matter the odds. But he never told you how painful a racing heart can be or how loud the sound of blood rushing through your system is. Although, you supposed you can forgive him since he would never want to imagine you coming face-to-face to a deranged beast as your own blood blurred your vision. 

During your expedition, you and your siblings encountered a group of disorientated beasts and while this was nothing new to you, these creatures were more unpredictable in comparison to your previous encounters with this species. It was as though they were fighting something internally and your squadron was unfortunately caught in the crossfire. The large beasts were demolishing things in their vicinity, indiscriminately knocking down anything and anyone without care. 

Their unpredictable attacks ultimately led to one of them taking a vicious swing towards you and your brother, sending you both over a tall cliff with the large beast tumbling after from the force of its own attack. 

You vividly recalled this scene, as it was foretold in your dreams. You were trapped and wounded with your brother unconscious after taking the brunt of the attack when shielding you. You willed yourself to keep a strong grip on your sword. If your dreams truly turn to reality, you and your brother will meet an untimely end here. 

“Great heavens, give me strength to protect my brother” you prayed as you took one more long breath before letting out a feral roar. 

You ran full speed towards the rampaging beast, putting all your strength into your swing to sever its leg, hoping to incapacitate its movement. Unfortunately, your depleted strength and eyesight left your attempt with a sizable wound but not enough to deter the giant. 

Your blood has now ran cold as you realise the severity of your situation. Partially blinded and hurt, you were helpless in front of the deranged beast. Your tears mixed with the blood that cascaded over your eyes but you thought there was no use in wiping away the mess on your face. 

In your fearful madness, you thought you might as well make your last moment memorable. You turned your head towards the sky, intending to stare at the beast with as much defiance, refusing to show fear towards any foe. 

But something was odd 

Since the encounter with the beasts, they were nothing but aggressive monsters, agitated and reckless in motion and action. Every moment with them was spent defending yourself from their endless attacks. 

So why does it seem peaceful? 

Even with a wound on its leg, the beast’s body was relaxed like it was in pure relief from whatever was ailing them. If you weren’t just glad you’re still alive, you might have been a little offended by the lack of interest the beast had on you. 

With the rush of adrenaline slightly fading, you started taking notice of your senses a bit more, your injuries were being recognised, you felt the burn in your legs from the stress…and you felt a strange sensation on your wrist. 

Looking down, you found the source to be the beast radar device made by Idia. You found it strange since it wasn’t nearly this hot even when you first came in contact with the beasts earlier but now, the device was evidently warm and you could sense an aura-like energy being emitted from it. You weren’t confident but you wondered if Idia added something more to your device. And it was affecting the beast before you.

Daring to test your theory, you slowly stepped back from the beast, angling your wrist further from the beast, observing the facial changes of the creature. True to your hypothesis (but unfortunately so), the beast’s body started shaking as though something unpleasant had returned to it. You wanted to celebrate your eureka moment but acknowledged this may not be the best time. 

Then, like a gallant warrior, a figure appeared seemingly from the heavens and with a swift motion, speared the beast’s head from above. The creature let out a final painful roar before crashing down before your feet. You looked above to see your sister perched atop the beast, covered in sweat and blood. 

Your sister jumped from her position and ran to you, encasing you in a tight embrace. You noticed how your sister was shaking with palpable fear. 

“You’re alive. Thank the heavens you’re both alive” your usually level-headed sister cried into your sister as she wrapped her arms tighter, which you’re impressed she still could. 

Although, you were grateful for the embrace as you felt your legs give out under you from exhaustion. Your sister worriedly called out your name as she supported your weight but incredibly, you just let out a laugh. 

Against the odds and contrary to your haunting dreams, you were alive. 

Was it strange you thought of Idia when you realised that? 

[yikimiki]

loser gamer!Eren x reader

> eren x fem!reader, vague smut, Eren is a clumsy virgin but he’s trying his best, reader is popular but in a lawful good way

Eren is the classic case of an ugly duckling that bloomed into a beautiful swan and never really got the memo. That way, as the years passed and his introspective habits remained the same, there was no one (no girl, mainly) to communicate to him that Eren is, in fact, a major hottie.

Here and there, he would get glimpses of it, but would look through the wrong lenses. If a classmate stared at him for too long, it was because he probably looked weird. If someone got too touchy, he would think they wanted to ask for a favor. And, without fail, every single time he was asked out or confessed to, Eren would think it was a prank. And that includes your own attempts.

Middle school trauma really does a number on you.

Eren is a virgin, clearly, and you’re not. That alone makes you have an upper hand, which he absolute hates, but the fact that a Girl Like You (as in, popular, extroverted, dazzlingly beautiful) is into him… well, that just makes him combust internally.

“Ren… it’s okay if you don’t want it,” you say, that pretty, glossy pout decorating your lips. Eren only got to this point — shirt off and belt half undone — because his roommate, Armin, had connected the dots for him. Now that you two are alone, he doesn’t know how to proceed. “We can just go back to playing Mario kart or something.”

Eren doesn’t know if he should laugh or cry — he thinks Mario Kart is a game for kids, but it’s the only thing you know how to play, and he doesn’t have the heart to tell you that. However, at this point, he’d rather be hit by a blue shell right at the finish line than to embarrass himself further.

“I want it,” he mumbles. Eren does want it — and his thick, throbbing cock poking out of his pants doesn’t leave any room for doubt. He thought he would be calmer after he told you he’s a virgin (thought he’s pretty sure you had deduced that from the amount of Doritos bags and monster energy drinks in his bin), but it only made it worse. Now, besides feeling like an unprepared loser, he feels like a failure. “I’m just nervous.”

Your hand reaches for his cheek. “I know, baby, it’s okay,” and your voice is so soothing that he believes it. “Let’s just take things slow, okay? And you can stop me whenever.”

Eren nods, and your mouth crashes against his. He feels like a teen all over again, not knowing what to do with his raging hormones, but he settles for placing his shaking hands on your waist. It is much easier when he’s watching his pornos — he realizes. The guy makes every seem so natural, so second nature. But Eren doesn’t know if he should try to be Manly And Dominant or if he should just let you take the lead until further notice.

“Can I sit on your cock?” You ask.

And then he has his answer.

[wonijinjin]

THE WEEKND SERIES: SAVE YOUR TEARS - BOO SEUNGKWAN

author’s note: i love seungkwan with all my heart, he is such a pure soul, he deserves all the happiness there is in this world.

synopsis: when you are at your lowest the person who helps you shine shows up to save the day.

word count: 0.6k | genre: fluff, angst, hurt/comfort | pairing: seungkwan x gn! reader | warnings: mentions of bad mental health, tiny bit of cursing

the masterpost of this series can be found here.

the first thing you heard when you came to was your phone ringing, then a loud noise of something breaking outside of your apartment. “i don’t know if you are awake, but i am coming in with the spare key!” you heard a way too familiar voice say, then the door unlocked, revealing your very disstressed best friend standing in front of you. “why the hell can’t you answer your phone?” he scolded you, however as soon as he took in your state his eyes widened in surprise. “no, no, no, what’s wrong sweetie?” he questioned while moving to cradle you into his arms. you were surely not the prettiest sight; nose dripping from snot, eyes bloodshot, clothes which looked like they hadn’t been changed in days hanging on your body roughly. “seungkwan, be honest.” you croaked out in a hoarse voice, from crying, he assumed. “of course, what’s up?” he asked curiously. “am i that horrible? am i really an ugly whiny bitch?” you started sobbing again, not having the energy to hold it in. he gasped in surprise and wrapped his arms around you even tighter, stroking your back and hair stimultaniously. “oh dear.” he whispered. “is this what you have been crying about here alone?” you nodded into his shirt without saying a word, knowing he felt it. “of course you are not, darling. how could you think that? i seriously don’t know who made you believe these horrible things, but you are none of these, understood?” he waited for your confirming nod that you were still conscious and with him. “please save your tears, you should not be crying about this. it all exists only in your head. you are the most beautiful person the world has ever seen, alright? such a brilliant mind, such a kind and caring soul. please don’t ever think of yourself lowly, you have no idea how much it hurts me when you say those things. you are so precious to me.” he mumbled into your hair, his motions of drawing soothing circles into your back never stopping. he pulled away from you, looking into your eyes. “gosh, you are so beautiful.” he whispered. “no i am not, i am a mess right now.” you replied with sad eyes. “you really don’t see it, do you?” he giggled, catching a tear which ran down your cheek, wiping it away with his thumb. “what?” you were confused. “how much you mean to me. i wish you could see yourself with my eyes, how perfect you are in them.” he mumbled as a blush made its way to his face. “show me.” you muttered in a hushed tone, leaning a little bit closer, distance between the two of you almost not existing. you could hear his heart beating rapidly. “do you know what you’re asking for?” he murmured against your face, voice hitching, eyes staring down at your lips. “this was long overdue, wasn’t it?” you answered. “so you knew.” he smiled. he didn’t expect you to notice how his gaze lingered on your lips for a tad bit too long whenever he looked at you. his lips touched yours quickly, with so much passion it was impossible to miss all the emotions he had been holding in. before you could kiss back he moved to your cheeks and nose, kissing away the tears which were streaming down your face again, but only did he know this time from relief. he placed another kiss to your lips then softly pulled away, eyes flattering open, three words leaving his mouth. “i love you.”