#I feel weird about posting this but Loki seems thrilled

[tadpoles-and-daydreams]

A ramble on imposter syndrome and the accessibility of witchcraft

So, I’ve been thinking. I think a lot in case you haven’t noticed. Specifically, I’ve been thinking about the major imposter syndrome I’ve been feeling lately in regards to this blog. TL;DR is at the bottom of this post.

People have been, occasionally, sending me asks requesting my opinion on things/how I do things/what I know about XYZ topic. If you are one of these people, I promise I’m not vagueposting about you in particular- in fact, I love these questions! They’re so fun to get and they actually make me sit and think sometimes, or even encourage me to write out something that I’ve been meaning to for my book of shadows. Genuinely, they're wonderful asks to receive. These questions have made me confront something, however; my blog is still small, but some people actually like what I write and value my opinion even if just a little. 

I feel like a mimic hiding in the witchcraft community. I feel like, were people to truly understand my experiences, they would want to “expose” me for knowing so little.

So I sat down with those feelings and turned it over in my head and I’ve come to a conclusion. The fact is, I don’t do research. At least- not what I think of when people talk about research. My "research" consists of the occasional rabbit hole I go down, one and two halves of different books I never finished under my belt, what I see scrolling through various social medias, and conversations I've had with other witches. I check to make sure I'm not stepping on the toes of any closed practices- in fact, that's what most of my energy goes to when it comes to research. This isn't a complaint; I'd much rather know that my craft isn't appropriative.

But I don’t know much about mythology, even that of the deities I work with. I don't even remember the holidays and what they're for. I thought Nyx was an Egyptian deity until like four months ago because I'd just heard her name in passing as a child and had never looked into the mythology... Even though I mainly work with the pantheon she belongs to. Y’all, I’ve done like three spells that I remember. My book of shadows is a messy disaster and I love it but it's got so little information in it, because I rarely write things down. Most resources (especially mythology resources) are academically worded or difficult to read for me personally, and all of these things feel like secrets I have to guard with my life because if I were to ever say them aloud, people would know I'm a fraud.

Today I've come to the conclusion that that is, in fact, absolute bullshit.

Maybe it's not, maybe this post will make some people really upset, but in my practice it's bullshit. All of the above is a result of my ADHD and the fact that I am nothing if not a hands-on learner. My craft is mostly my own experiences because that's how my whole life is; I learn by doing. My ideal learning style is sitting with another autistic person whose special interest is whatever I'm learning about and just talking for five hours, but if that's not something I can do, puzzling it out myself is the next best thing. That's what I've been doing ever since I felt had a basic foundation for my craft. Hell, even before I had a foundation I was putting my own experiences into my craft because "Well that rule just doesn't fucking vibe with me."

This post is mostly for me, but partially for anyone who feels similar. We are not broken or doing witchcraft/paganism wrong. We are simply what happens when the kid who could never do homework ends up practicing the "religion/spirituality that comes with homework." Witchcraft and paganism, in my experience, is far from accessible when it comes to the typical image of it. UPG is what makes it accessible. So yes, my practice is heavily UPG, and I don't do as much research as I think people have assumed. But I'm going to let go of the idea that I'm a fraud, because frankly I know enough about witchcraft to have supported my practice this whole time and my deities haven't smited me yet so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

TL:DR:

Fuck the rules, I don't do much research. I've researched the "basics" and what I need to so I'm not stepping on any toes of closed practices, but people seem to think I know way more than I actually do. I've felt like I was lying this whole time but frankly witchcraft just isn't accessible to someone with my flavor of auDHD, so my craft relies heavily on UPG and I've decided that I'm not broken or wrong for that and neither is anyone else. I'm tired of seeing myself as an imposter just because I make my practice doable for me.

[wackymaci]

PRESENTING.,,, A FULLY CANON CONVO: “ChalBel looks for loki (lmfao)/ and RETURNS HIM”

hey what if…. I just post the entire thing.

hm :)c (yes that’s the formal archive title^)

QUICK NOTES BEFORE YOU READ ALL THIS🥹

1. SEND A MINDREADER AFTER THE GOD OF LIES????? god it should have ALWAYS been set to happen this way!!

2. Once upon a time I said that i feel bad for never wholly portraying Bel in my art and posts due to the fact that Bel’s moments are usually up against Chal, who’s a chaotic mess, and so Bel always seems really calm and stoic when compared to her. THIS conversation is the most perfect, perfect, peak Bel showcase completely. please view the MOST Married Couple of All Time, they are SOOOO

3. a special thank you (as ALWAYS) to fenixe (who is not even here fgkFGK) - as we all know, fenixe and I never PLAN anything OoC together and even when shit happens we’re never conferencing about , like. intention. so for her to SO COMPLETELY AND ACCURATELY clock exactly what Loki’s doing (through Bel, mindreader!!) is so,, chefs kiss. THE ELYSIUM HIVEMIND??? We don’t OoC conference because we don’t NEED TOOOO LMAOOO-

4. Format is in fact spacier and slightly weird due to just being a full copypaste of the thread. I’m actually not going to post this as screenshots cause it is SOOOOOOOOOO LONG and. I can’t decide where to cut and paste. so… so!! hghhh this is why I do screenshots cause *i* hate when it’s formatted like this but whateverrrrrrr I’ll get over it. that being said I went ahead and bolded names idk if that’s easier to read or???

5. Obviously don’t reblog this lol

6. pls enjoy. HHHHHHGHHG-

~*~

Chal: -curled with Bel-

Libby: -wanders to-

Chal: Hi. How was your cult meeting?

Libby: Um, it was good…

Bel: -quiet- -petting Chal-

Libby: Can you go look for Loki for us?

Chal: …Who, me?

Libby: Uh-huh.

Chal: …Me specifically? What? Why?

Bel: I’ll go with you.

Chal: -glances between- Wh— huh? How is that my fucking job?

Libby: -flutters wings- We think Loki may be hiding in the pocket voids around here—no one else really knows how to get to them, so…

Chal: What do you mean he’s hiding?

Libby: ‘Cause the baby, and…

Chal: What do you mean the baby?

Bel: He’s pregnant.

Chal: He’s pregnant?

Libby: Yeah, so he ran away. We’re trying to find him, he.

Libby: -small voice- He um, Tory and Maci are really upset. Well, everyone’s really upset.

Chal: The fuck do Tory and Maci care?

Libby: Um…

Bel: Tory’s the other parent.

Chal: …Is he hiding from Maci?

Bel: I don’t think so? They’re on good terms now.

Chal: What am I supposed to do if I find him?

Libby: Bring him home.

Chal: -scoffs- He’s not gonna fucking listen to me.

Bel: If he doesn’t listen, should we call you?

Libby: Uh-huh. Me, or… Rane’s always in charge, or maybe Fen…

Chal: Whoa whoa whoa what if he flips out at me? What if he fucking turns me into a baby again?!

Bel: I’ll poof you away if I hear him thinking about it.

Libby: Please, Chal? He’s my mom, and no one else knows knows how to get into the voids.

Chal: Maybe I don’t even fucking know how to get into those anymore, it’s been a long fucking time since…

Libby: Chal pleeee-ase.

Chal: -frowns- -quiet-

Chal: -mumbles- Okay fine.

Bel: -takes Chal’s hand-

Libby: -hugs Chal- Thank you thank you.

Chal: -mumbles- Whatever.

Chal: -squeezes Bel’s hand- -poofs with-

Bel: -laces fingers-

Chal: What’s the fucking plan here? Should we have come up with a plan? What the fuck are I supposed to say if we actually find him?

Chal: This is so stupid. These things are like, all over the place. There’s so many of them and they all look the same. I don’t have a map. Only Loki has a map, maybe.

Bel: I guess just, say that his kids want him to come home?

Chal: -runs hands over face- Gods fuck oh my gods fuck. Yeah, ‘cause we’re gonna be the ones he’s gonna be thrilled to see. Fuck me oh my gods fuck this.

Chal: -curls wings- -sighs- …Well, he’s not in this one.

Bel: -looking around- How many of these are there?

Chal: Yeah, that’s the other thing— I have no idea. Tens? Hundreds? Thousands?

Chal: -poofs with-

Chal: …Probably not thousands. That seems like a lot.

Bel: I guess we’ll keep looking?

Chal: -small nod-

Chal: They’re not even nice to be in, they’re empty, they’re unsettling. Like accidentally ending up behind the fucking scenes or something.

Chal: -sighs- How long has Loki even been hiding for?

Bel: I’m not sure. I didn’t hear it.

Chal: But you heard Libby’s meeting? Did they all offer me up as sacrifice to Loki’s rage?

Bel: -shakes head- They wanted your help because you can navigate these places.

Bel: -pauses-

Bel: And they wanted me with you to do the talking if we find him.

Chal: …Oh. That makes more sense, he might listen to you. Definitely not me.

Chal: -poofs with-

Chal: What if he turns you into a baby?

Bel: I’ll, um.

Bel: I’ll try not to let it go there.

Chal: -stops- …Loki used to— Loki was a fucking, supervillain. Isn’t Loki fucking dangerous? Is this dangerous?

Chal: Is he going crazy in a fit of fucking rage? What if we have to fight him?

Chal: I, I can’t win against him in a fight. I don’t even know if I know how to fight anymore and I can’t do magic.

Bel: He hasn’t been overtly malicious in a long while.

Chal: Maybe he turned “overtly malicious” while he was running away. Maybe he’s gonna be in a real overtly malicious fucking mood about me and you trying to talk to him. Um, you trying to talk to him.

Bel: Still, it’s… We got asked to look for him by his kids. It’s important we try.

Chal: -mumbles- We don’t have to… Ugh, I guess.

Chal: You knew he was gonna have a baby…?

Bel: -nods- I heard it, but he didn’t want me to tell anyone.

Chal: Oh, shit.

Chal: -poofs with- -looking around-

Chal: And no one else knew? For like, a long fucking time?

Bel: No one but Tory and Maci, I guess.

Chal: -gives look- …And you and Ty.

Bel: Not on purpose.

Chal: Hmph.

Chal: How long am I supposed to keep going through the voids for? What if he’s not even in any of these? We could be here fucking forever. Who’s gonna put N to bed?

Bel: I guess when we need to put N to bed, we can stop.

Chal: -sulks- And then just, back at it tomorrow and every fucking day forever?

Chal: What if he hides for nine months?

Bel: If it’s too much labor, well…

Bel: We do have a daughter to take care of.

Chal: Right. Exactly, yeah. We do. I’m not taking N into the voids, so…

Chal: …-quieter- Is, um. Is Libby really upset?

Bel: She’s worried, mostly.

Chal: -sighs-

Chal: -mumbles- I’m sure Loki would probably come back on his own eventually…

Bel: Probably, but…

Bel: Well, he’s at risk for complications. If he’s not able to use his magic or get help…

Chal: Oh… Oh, that’s…

Chal: -frowns- Why… why’d he fucking leave then?

Bel: I don’t know.

Bel: Habit, or nerves?

Chal: -squints- That doesn’t make any sense. If he’s nervous about complications why banish himself to the fucking, middle of nowhere where no one can even get to him?

Chal: …Does Loki have anxiety?

Bel: -nods- A ton of it, actually.

Chal: -stops- Huh. …Seriously?

Bel: Yeah.

Chal: He could try therapy. He made me fucking do it.

Bel: -small smile- Maybe when he’s back home, you can suggest it.

Chal: Yeah, right. If he’s not mad enough at me for trying to find him, then that’ll do it for fucking sure…

Bel: -quiet-

Chal: -squeezes hand- -mumbles- This is so stupid. I mean, he could be in any of these. He could even be anywhere.

Bel: -soft sigh-

Chal: -poofs with-

Chal: Maybe he’s not even in here at all. Who said he was hiding here in the first place? If no one knows how to get in then how—

Loki: -looks at-

Chal: -stops short-

Bel: Oh—

Chal: -stutters- Oh, fuck—

Loki: -raises eyebrow- -faintly- Interesting.

Loki: -gestures to poof-

Bel: Wait!

Loki: -snarls- What.

Bel: You—

Bel: -runs hands over face- Ugh.

Chal: …Holy fuck you’re really fucking pregnant—

Loki: -eyeroll- -poofs-

Bel: Aaaaagh fuck you fuck you come back.

Chal: -sputters- That is SO pregnant! What happens if he has a baby in here?! Do you know how to deliver a baby?!

Chal: -clutches at- What if we find him again and he’s having a baby?

Bel: I-I mean, he knows how, so I could read his mind and figure it out…

Chal: I don’t—

Chal: -small noise- -poofs with-

Chal: -spins all around- -deflates- Fuck, fuck, it’s empty.

Bel: Maybe he’s still close?

Chal: Okay. Okay.

Chal: Okay if we find him again what do we do.

Bel: I’ll try to talk to him.

Bel: Like, actually talk.

Chal: Okay, fuck, okay.

Chal: Okay, lemme— -poofs with-

Chal: -frustrated groan- -poofs again-

Chal: -goes to poof- …. -freezes- Oh—

Loki: -sighs- -dryly- Oh, you’re after me, is that it? Here I thought I might be interrupting date night.

Bel: Shitokayokay—

Bel: Look, your children asked us to help find you.

Bel: They want you home.

Loki: -face falls slightly- -tucks arm around belly- -composes self-

Loki: Well, you can let them know you’ve found me. That I’m quite well. That I love them dearly.

Loki: …-frowns- That I don’t want to return, which they ought to know.

Bel: Why??

Bel: Everyone — Tory, Maci, your family, they’re upset.

Bel: They miss you.

Loki: -swallows hard- -petting belly-

Loki: Ah, well. You see, it’s simply because—

Loki: -gives look- -poofs-

Bel: WAIT—

Chal: NO!

Chal: -fidgets- D-do we keep going or pass a message?

Bel: Keep going!

Bel: All the fucking teleporting is making me nauseous, it’s fucking personal now, just go!

Chal: -scrambles- -poofs-

Loki: Don’t you have better things to do?

Chal: -startles- Oh shit, there you— Do the voids all go in— order?

Loki: Would you like a map? Would that be easier for you?

Bel: Oh my gods, just fucking listen!

Bel: Why are you even here? You know full well you’re just making yourself worse being all alone; what happened to not up and disappearing for this child?

Loki: -witty retort dies- -falters slightly-

Bel: And your kids figured out what’s wrong on their own — I didn’t tell anyone — because you always. fucking. do this.

Chal: -clutching Bel- -staring between-

Loki: None of this concerns you. Neither of you.

Chal: Bullshit, Libby misses you too.

Bel: Yeah, it does! My sister-in-law’s missing her fucking dad.

Loki: -evenly- I believe I’m designated Libby’s mother, thank you very much.

Bel: Ohmygods, it’s semantics.

Loki: -waves hand- I’ll return eventually. My children can come to me. When there aren’t search parties I can— they know this. They know I’ll always…

Bel: Fucking hell, they’re worried you’re gonna get hurt.

Bel: Wasn’t that the whole point of staying home? You’ve got support if something happens?

Bel: Fucking off to a hidey-void is familiar, I get it, but it’s not safer.

Loki: I won’t be hurt.

Loki: -glaring daggers- And it feels safer.

Loki: I don’t need support, this endless charade. I can handle myself, myself. I j-just— I just need time to— -falters-

Loki: -swallows- -viciously- Being chased through liminal spaces isn’t helpful, either.

Bel: Time to what? Sabotage your relationships because they can’t abandon you if you do it first, on your terms?

Loki: -breath hitches- -visible flinch-

Loki: -snarls- -POOFS-

Chal: -coughs- The dramatic smoke wasn’t necessary, can you not piss him off into exploding—

Bel: -yelling- GO TO FUCKING THERAPY.

Chal: -poofs with-

Loki: Now you’re really starting to irritate me.

Bel: You’re irritated? I’m irritated!

Loki: You’re welcome to leave!

Bel: I’m not done yelling at you!

Bel: Tory thinks he’s done something wrong and who’s gotta listen to his head? Me!

Loki: -pales slightly- —Gods I told him it wasn’t personal, th-that none of this would be…

Bel: You’re fairly well known for lying.

Loki: -sneers- Well, then there’s what happened for “not up and disappearing with this child,” your answer in turn.

Bel: Bullshit, I know this is your other bit: you’re also well-known for acquiring nice situations, getting nervous about something happening to the nice situation, and then you create a catastrophe because if the nice thing you have is gonna go up in flames, at least it’s on your terms.

Bel: How will you know if people give a shit about you if you never give them a chance?

Loki: -opens mouth- -closes-

Loki: -blinking furious tears- -poofs-

Chal: -breathless- I think you’re fucking winning, -poofs after-

Loki: -frustrated groan- This seems like all just a lot of fuss for no reason.

Loki: They’ve others to occupy their time— They can fuck the clones, if they’re so deprived. Tell them I said so.

Chal: Aagh, gods.

Bel: What do you mean, no reason? Your children want you home, Tory and Maci want you home, Rane’s made a fucking council to figure out where you went.

Loki: Rane’s always making councils, it’s her favorite hobby.

Chal: You keep swerving around all the fucking subjects.

Loki: -glares at- -icily- No reason, as my children can come and go to find me as they see fit, for visits if they wish. All these theatrics, sprung upon me before I’d a chance to find them. Tory and Maci—

Loki: -voice wobbles slightly- …Are f… furious, I’m sure, and I won’t return to be in the line of fire.

Loki: And Rane just likes gathering councils. There, all your subjects.

Bel: I’m not stupid. You think Tory and Maci will blow up if you come back?

Bel: Your children don’t even know where you are; it’s why we found you.

Bel: Everyone misses you and wants you safe. Go home.

Loki: You must understand this was all very impromptu. I didn’t mean… I didn’t… I would have sent for my children, I didn’t get a chance to— I’d never leave them—

Loki: I-In the meantime, Maci and Tory will find another fifty things to be angry about beyond myself and the turmoil I’ve caused; eventually I can fall further from out of their graces and into irrelevance, I— I’ll return when tempers are cooled, once they’ve moved on.

Bel: Tempers never went off! They’re worried, not angry. You’re creating scenarios in your head, and that’s the only place they exist.

Bel: If you care about them at all, you’ll cut it out with the borderline behavior and stop sabotaging the relationship you built.

Loki: -hugging belly- -stares away from-

Loki: You’re utterly naive if you think I could just, what, waltz back? Popped out for a quick break? Pretend it never happened, fall back to— the normalcy that— the way I— we’d—

Loki: And say it does and I dissolve into panic again and—

Loki: —Oh for gods’ sake, might we all sit in a circle and discuss our feelings here? Might we all be better off? Begone with this. Let me be.

Bel: You literally can. Just go back.

Loki: I won’t. I won’t return to collapse again— and again, again. They ought to have known what they’d— I’d warned them. Their own stupidity if they’d chosen bare optimism instead.

Loki: -sneers- And you can pass that message along, as well. -goes to poof-

Loki: -green fizzles- -goes nowhere-

Chal: -startles- …O-oh, shit…?

Loki: …-closes eyes- -SIGHS-

Bel: Out of juice?

Loki: -withering glare- -yes-

Chal: -holds out panicky hands- Are you gonna— have the, fucking baby?

Loki: …No, Chal.

Bel: It’s fucking with his magic.

Loki: -snaps at- Perhaps it’s merely a side effect of hauling myself and a large, developing mystery, to travel rapidfire across many, many difficult to reach pockets in succession.

Loki: I was quite comfortable where you’d found me. Quiet. Alone, peaceful. A bed that wasn’t sweltering, no impossible expectations looming over my head. Functioning magic, m-mostly. Here we are, a million voids later.

Chal: Shit, it is fucking with you? You look all— sweaty.

Loki: Just go away.

Bel: Fine, it’s not like I have much else to say to you—

Bel: -lunges for Loki- -poofs with-

Loki: -struggles away from- -PREGNANT AND AWKWARD- -snarling- How DARE you, you’ll pay for this I swear it—

Chal: -yelling- No the fuck he won’t, he’s fucking helping your stupid ass anyway!

Bel: -poofs back to palace-

Loki: -crumples to knees- -trying not to cry-

Loki: -folds over belly-

Libby: -gasps- You actually found—?!

Bel: Yeah, somehow.

Bel: Also fuck him, he kept teleporting from pocket to pocket.

Chal: I-I think we’re all dizzy and nauseous, really fucking fun, fucking asshole—

Libby: Are you okay?! Are you— -kneels to Loki- A-are you, okay, the baby…?

Loki: -hangs head- The baby’s okay, I…

Loki: -tears streaming- -whispers- Please don’t call your siblings, they shouldn’t s-see me in this state.

Loki: You won, let me be.

Libby: I…

Chal: -beseeches Tory-

Tory: -poofs-

Chal: -points-

Tory: -pauses-

Loki: -hunches into ball- -choked sob-

Libby: -hovers- The, the baby’s okay, he said…

Tory: -quiet- -pets Chal’s shoulder-

Chal: -stumbles back against Tory- S, sorry I don’t know if I— maybe I shouldn’t have called you if, b-but he said not the kids and Bel and me already spent too much time fucking yelling at him in the voids and I don’t, uhh…

Tory: -kisses top of head- You did really good.

Chal: -beams slightly- Bel did better.

Tory: You’re a team.

Chal: -BEAMS MORE- -squeezes Bel’s hand-

Chal: Please don’t let him fucking kill us.

Tory: -crouches by Loki-

Loki: -sobbing in heap- -trembling-

Tory: -pets-

Loki: -coughs- -sobs-

Chal: -inches closer to Bel- H-his um, he couldn’t teleport… Maybe the baby, we dunno.

Tory: -squeezes Loki’s shoulder- Stand up.

Loki: -tears streaming- -sniffling- -shakes head-

Loki: …-struggles up anyway- -holding belly-

Loki: -can’t look at-

Tory: -hugs Loki-

Loki: -stiffens- … -sobs- -crumples into-

Tory: -rubbing back-

Loki: -trembling-

Libby: I-I um, I’ll tell everyone that he… I-I’ll tell them to see you tomorrow, if…

Libby: You’re… staying, right? You’re not leaving again tomorrow?

Loki: -small voice- -hoarse- I’ll b-be here.

Tory: -brushes hair out of face-

Loki: -small sob- -stares into floor-

Tory: You’re okay?

Loki: -shakes head-

Tory: Do you want to sit down?

Loki: -wobbly nod- -not looking at-

Chal: -like watching a trainwreck- -backs away-

Chal: -so awkward- Do you— you can— have our room if, we’ll all go s-someplace else if you, have to cry on the floor or, something.

Tory: -guides Loki to couch- I’ll take care of him.

Chal: -nodnodnod- -grabs Bel/Libby- -mutters- I need to fucking lie down. We’re walking to bed, I’m teleporting zero more times tonight.

~*~

aaaaand..,,, scene

thanks for reading<3 yknow…. I hope posting these threads (pieces, whole parts) provides some insight into why I’m the way I am with elysium lmfao

AAHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!

[thelightofthingshopedfor]

Dear Yuletide writer,

I’m 100indecisions on AO3. just based on numbers of requests/offers in the signup summary, it seems fairly likely that you matched with me on Avengers Academy, but it’s also slightly possible it was Silent Hill 3 or The Bifrost Incident. numbers also indicate nobody else requested or offered my other two fandoms, but I’m including them here anyway in case you or anyone else wants to take a stab at them. (there’s also this post if you want a little more info about why these fandoms are cool and where to find them.)

regardless! the important thing as always is that you have fun writing the fic, and for the most part everything that follows is just a suggestion. whatever you come up with, I’m sure I’ll love it.

I feel like…most of the fandoms I requested aren’t too likely to lead to fics with my major DNWs, probably. I wouldn’t want to see dubcon or significant manipulation in a relationship that’s supposed to be positive and healthy, for instance. I’m not opposed to explicit sex scenes of any kind, although I often end up skimming them because I’m the type of ace person who is just Not Interested in most of the physical aspects, so…you’re welcome to write sex scenes if it’s relevant but you absolutely don’t have to feel like you need to.

in general, my biggest DNW is unhappy endings. I’m thrilled to see my favorite characters go through all kinds of hell to get there, so for most of these I would be very happy to get something tagged Crueltide, but I also like things to be okay or at least hopeful by the end. if canon is the unhappy part in one way or another, I’m always happy to read fix-it fics. Between post-canon fix-its that could reasonably happen in the future and canon-divergence AUs where things are okay now because of some mid-canon change, I have a slight preference for the former, but both are good.

as for stuff I like, well, the other thing implied by my main DNW is that I do often enjoy fairly dark fics, as long as they end okay. I also like Loki a lot, as you can probably guess from my requests. if you ended up matching me on Avengers Academy Loki or Bifrost Incident Loki, and/or you want to take a stab at one of the other Loki-centric requests, the Loki fics I’ve actually written are pretty representative of stuff I like in my Loki fics, which basically boils down to “sympathetic interpretations always, with loads of angst and/or whump on the way to a reasonably happy ending”. I tend to take a somewhat lighter tone in general with my Avengers Academy fics (I’ve written several of those and only one of them doesn’t involve Loki at all, so…yeah I have a one-track mind where Loki is concerned), although I did also write a pretty damn whumpy fic for AvAc Loki. I’m very invested in the relationship between Thor and Loki as brothers, although Thorki is usually a personal squick. for things that aren’t necessarily Loki-related, I like found families and deep friendships, sibling bonds, stories about characters reclaiming their own agency from some outside force and/or figuring out how to take control of their own narratives, and probably plenty of other things that aren’t coming to mind at the moment. I’m equally good with plotty fics and little slice-of-life or introspective pieces. I will always always always be happy to see queer characters, especially asexual ones.

more detail about my specific requests, basically just expanded versions of what I wrote in my sign-up:

Silent Hill 3 (Heather Mason). I love this game and that’s mostly because of Heather–she’s resourceful, brave, and incredibly tough, and the game is essentially all about her reclaiming her agency (in a very literal, physical way) from people who used her for their own ends. Anything that gets into Heather’s head would be great, whether it’s a missing scene of some kind during the game or something afterward that explores what she does next, how she recovers from a frankly massive amount of trauma, and how she reconciles the various layers of her identity. The ways in which Heather, Cheryl the child, and Alessa both are and are not the same person are endlessly fascinating to me, and it seems like she probably has a lot of weird memories bouncing around in her head at this point--and possibly some extra trauma from Alessa’s memories of things Heather never physically experienced, as if she doesn’t have enough to deal with already. I would also really love to see something involving Angela and/or Maria from Silent Hill 2; I’m not sure how the timelines would line up (although realistically, considering the setting, that part would be trivial to handwave) but the way Heather basically said “fuck you, you don’t own me” to the cult makes me want to see other female characters find their own agency as well, and it would be really awesome if Heather found a way to help them do that, either by helping them directly or just by influencing the way the town operates. in general, I love these games for their atmosphere and symbolism, so anything you can do along those lines would be great.

Avengers Academy (Loki, Thor). I still miss this game. I especially miss Loki, who was a snarky little bastard but really not a bad dude. Mostly I’d be thrilled to see anything that focuses on him (or her, I super loved Loki’s canonical genderfluidity) developing actual friendships at the academy, with any characters who might be relevant (Steve, Natasha, America Chavez, Nebula, Union Jack, Angela, Jane Thor, really anybody). Working things out with Thor and/or the rest of his family is always good too; Loki’s Frost Giant storyline didn’t involve Thor at all, for instance, probably because it was written long before Thor was added to the game, so I’d be interested to see how things went when he found out his brother was a Frost Giant. I’m also always happy to see crossovers of some kind with other Marvel universes, especially considering AvAc was an interesting patchwork of film and comics canon; meta stuff where characters are aware of their multiverse counterparts is always fun (again, my own AvAc fics are pretty representative of what I like…and if you wanted to build off anything in those, I’d be thrilled). and hey, if you want to pick up or expand on any of the plot threads the game never really got around to, like more about the Academy’s supposed mole, the actual nature and origin of the timefog, or other worldbuilding-related stuff, that would be awesome. random slice-of-life stuff is also fun; so is expanding on any of the event plotlines or digging into in-world reasons for various gameplay decisions (way back during the Civil War event, for instance, Loki was one of the characters who could do stuff to earn points for Team Cap even though this didn’t come up in dialogue--it was almost certainly because they needed another non-event character to round out the rosters, but it would also make a fun premise for a fic). I’d also be happy to see something post-canon, showing what characters are up to now or doing some kind of reunion. I’m realizing somewhat belatedly that last year I only requested Loki because that’s the character I wanted most, and this year I requested both Loki and Thor even though my actual wishes haven’t changed, which...I’m not sure if that’s a potential matching problem or not. But just to be clear, the only character I require is Loki, and everything else is basically a suggestion. If there’s a character I haven’t listed but Loki had an interesting interaction with them, or they never spoke but you think they’d play off each other in fun ways, go for it.

The Bifrost Incident - The Mechanisms (Loki, Thor, Sigyn). I...need a fix-it. Like, for these characters specifically, but also for the universe in general, because the premise of this album is absolutely fascinating but I can't deal with tragedy, so--I need somebody to fix it. Somehow. I mean, I would also be very interested in pretty much anything about Loki and Sigyn, backstory or otherwise (especially if there’s Loki whump due to cosmic horror in general or Odin being a dick specifically, because...I am who I am), or Loki’s relationship with Thor, or...yeah, pretty much anything Loki-centric? But also I am a baby who cannot deal with tragedy so I gotta have like...at least a hint that things are going to end up differently than in canon. Or if you really don’t want to do that, speculate on this universe’s version of Valhalla or something, I don’t know. And yes, even though this isn’t a Marvel universe, I would also be very happy with some type of crossover/fusion with the MCU or another Marvel universe.

Loki: Where Mischief Lies - Mackenzi Lee (Loki). I had a lot of issues with this book and I’m not sure how much of that is just me not appreciating what the author was doing with an unreliable narrator (in part because I’m already pretty attached to certain interpretations of Loki) and how much is the author not quite doing it right, but I’d love to see something that would…make it make sense internally in terms of Loki’s motivations and actions. It doesn’t necessarily have to be a fix-it, although I’d love one of those too, with Loki reuniting with Theo and/or actually reconciling with his family. A giant crossover that includes this Loki with other major versions of Loki could be fun too. I’ve been planning for a while to write up some kind of actual review to articulate what about this book didn’t work for me, and I’ll update this post with a link when I do that, although…again, I know nobody else offered or requested this one. (if you think it sounds fun or you just want to read this book in general, my library actually has the ebook on Hoopla, so it’s worth checking to see if your library does too.)

What If... Thor Was Raised by the Frost Giants? (Loki, Thor). This is such a great little AU and I need MORE. Slice-of-life stuff with Thor and Loki growing up (and Laufey being an abusive bastard to Loki)? Fix-it where Freyja survives or somehow gets brought back? Post-canon fic picking up immediately after the end of the comic? Far-future speculation about what the present-day Marvel universe might look like with this change in its history? Literally anything post-canon about Thor and Loki tentatively reconciling? YES PLEASE. As always, biggest DNW is unhappy endings.

[that-shamrock-vibe]

Superhero Spotlight: Avengers Endgame Posters - Reveals and Theories

Alright so we have our first set of characters posters for the upcoming juggernaut that is Avengers: Endgame to conclude and capitalize on the equally huge Avengers: Infinity War and wrap up what has been called the Infinity Saga phase of the MCU.

As these posters have raised many opinions, questions, theories and rather touching memes relating to other franchises and properties, I thought I would give my thoughts to some of the questions and theories as well as raise my own.

Missed Opportunities:

Alright so I can’t really go into what’s good or bad in terms of breaking down the posters because, unlike others, these are simply more or less headshots of the characters. Now on the one hand, this is a rather touching throwback to the first Avengers movie where the character posters there were also somewhat headshots as the main six characters were only shown to the side of the posters half-in in full supersuit attire. But that raises the negative aspect to this choice in that, it would have been nice to have seen the characters that aren’t in full supersuit attire in supersuit attire.

Now I can understand both sides of the argument to why they didn’t do this. As to why it would have been a good idea is because, for some of them, this is most likely their last hoorah when it comes to starring in an MCU movie and so to show Iron Man, Captain America, War Machine, Spider-Man and Black Panther with their masks/helmets would have been a nice touch rather than just seeing the character end with the head and then the actors take over from the neck up. But at the same time I can see why they didn’t because it adds another layer of drama and likeability to these characters if you can see the defeated look in their eyes and the determination they have to “Avenge the Fallen”.

Falcon, Star-Lord and Captain Marvel I give passes to on that because the latter two’s headgear isn’t always used and goggles pretty much block out any emotion. Also Thor and Loki’s helmets haven’t been used recently, Ant-Man and Wasp I give passes to in the same way I give Iron Man a pass.

In terms of characters not getting a poster, I do believe this all but confirms that Peter Dinklage’s Eitri will not return because even some of those who died prior to the snap made the cut for a poster and we will get into that.

Others who didn’t get a poster, who I am not so much surprised about but if Wong and Happy got posters why not them, are Hank Pym and Janet Van Dyne, Maria Hill, Nakia, M’Baku, Erik Selvig and Jane Foster. While we don’t know the fate of the latter four we didn’t know the confirmed fates of Valkyrie or Shuri to be certain.

Another missed opportunity is not having Ruffalo pictured with some sort of Hulk colouring. I still say his full promo shot for The Avengers which showed the Jekyll/Hyde of the character perfectly was one of the best promos the MCU has had. Whether or not they don’t want to reveal too much of this new Hulk they’re teasing may explain his absence but we’ll see.

The Reveals:

Alright so three major things are revealed in these posters alone. 1) Valkyrie, Wong and Happy survived the Snap, Valkyrie’s survival most likely means her rumoured appearance in the movie is true. I do find it interesting how all of the shippers who try pairing Cap and Bucky together in a romantic way are now also pairing Carol Danvers and Valkyrie together, yet unlike “Stucky” this pairing actually seems to be a potential thing as not only has Captain Marvel become an overnight LGBT icon akin to Wonder Woman, but because Tessa Thompson has already revealed Valkyrie is bisexual there are grounds for this ship to become canon and for us to have our first LGBT superhero romance in superhero movies either kicking off or teased in Phase 4.

The second thing that is revealed is Shuri apparently did not survive the snap, I genuinely believe this is a fake-out by Kevin Feige and/or the Russo Brothers as a way of throwing us off guard for a massive shock reveal.

I suspect, much like a lot of fans, that the shot of Shuri’s image among the list of the missing which also includes Spider-Man and Ant-Man is simply that, a list of the missing...not deceased or dusted. Yes Spider-Man is dead but unless Tony and/or Nebula are back on Earth at the time of this scene, no one knows if he’s actually dusted or not. We know Ant-Man isn’t dusted but trapped in the Quantum Realm so it stands to reason that after being knocked out by the Black Order during the Battle of Wakanda, she came around and simply went into hiding. There is every chance she survived the Snap because unless we see them turn into dust I wouldn’t trust the word of directors.

The third thing is the fact that only all of Tony’s supporting players survived the Snap. Rhodey, Pepper and Happy all survived to potentially see Iron Man’s last stand? It is weird that both Falcon and Bucky are dusted, no mention of Erik, Darcy and Jane, Fury and Maria Hill are both dusted and Banner lost his supporting players before Mark Ruffalo took over. So out of all the main six’s supporting players only Iron Man has his full team with him, maybe with the exception of Spider-Man but he’s a superhero in his own right.

Heroes are going to die in this movie, thee is no doubt about that. It is just a question of how gut-punching they want to make the deaths.as memorable and outstanding as possible. In my opinion, any of the main six dying would be a gut punch for the MCU but I feel at least Captain America or Iron Man will be one if not two of the casualties in this movie.

I don’t see Black Widow or Thor dying because Thor’s popularity of late has most likely saved him and he’ll hopefully go off and find a new Asgard while Black Widow, who looks fantastic here by the way, has her own movie coming out.

Banner and Hawkeye are the two I am on the fence about from a business and directorial standpoint, I love Hawkeye and am thrilled Renner looks set to finally full realize the character’s awesomeness here but when you think there have to be some casualties here it doesn’t look good. Also I think Bruce Banner/Hulk has run his course within the MCU.

The Theories:

So I have or have heard 3 major theories to come out of these posters, the first is my own Shuri theory in that her colourless photo here is simply a rouse.

The second is one I’ve heard revolving around Loki with fans saying that because he legitimately died prior to the Snap that it is a little bit odd that his photo is among those who have been dusted...unless he is going to return in Endgame. Firstly I am believing the same theory applies to Gamora because while she is in the Soul Stone rather than suffocated to death, she was never dusted and therefore technically shouldn’t be among these photos, otherwise where is Heimdell?

But secondly, I genuinely believe this is simply a list of fallen heroes who fell at the hands or Snap of Thanos and, for better or worse, Loki was a hero in the end as he tried standing up to Thanos. Do I think that means he’s getting a revival with everyone else, well I still say they need to make some deaths stick but because Loki is getting his own series and he has survived death a couple of times before, I would this it is plausible for him to make a surprise return.

The third, long-standing theory is that Marvel and Disney will use the Snap as a way of keeping certain Guardians members dead. This was something brought up in the aftermath of the original blow for James Gunn...but then it turned out he was never really fired and it was all just a fake-out.

When fans thought he had been fired though, Guardians of the Galaxy Vol. 3 was in flux to the point where it was getting pushed back and fans believed it would be easier on Disney to keep the dusted Guardians members dead and have Rocket and Nebula either join the Avengers or go off on their own, but again this is now not the case.

If Gunn wants to wrap up his trilogy with his original team, as to be honest I think he should, then it makes sense for the four dusted Guardians members to come back. However, in this fan’s personal opinion, I think the MCU and Guardians 3 could do without at least Drax and Mantis. Star-Lord either needs to be held accountable for his stupidity on Titan or just needs to lead the team and be intimidated by Zac Efron’s Adam Warlock in Guardians 3, Gamora needs to return because she is currently in the Soul Stone. But of course, Dave Bautista is Gunn’s biggest supporter and so he will not stay dead.

Overall:

So it is sad because as nice as these posters look, we as fans already know they’re going to bring people back and looking at all of them lined up...if they don’t have a movie sequel or a co-star role in a movie sequel coming up, they have a television series in the works on Disney+. Now this again could be a rouse by Disney to try and lull us into a false sense of security but the ones who have TV shows like Falcon, Vision and Scarlet Witch are all three of my favourites so I don’t want it to be true and them to be reduced to TV but I also don’t want them to remain dead.

I would say the only ones on the dead side who currently could stay dead are either Hope van Dyne or Nick Fury. Hope because Ant-Man does not have a threequel planned while Doctor Strange, Black Panther, the Guardians and Spider-Man all have upcoming movies. Nick Fury because I can never remember how many more movie’s he has left on his contract and feel Spider-Man Far From Home would be a great fake-out not only if Fury in that movie was an illusion of Mysterio’s but also if it then when further to reveal that Fury was really dead.

So what do you guys think? What’s your favourite poster? Who do you think will stay dead? Do you see a romantic future for Captain Marvel and Valkyrie? Post your comments and check out more Superhero Spotlights as well as other posts

[douxreviews]

Avengers: Age of Ultron (2015)

"There are no strings on me."

Joss Whedon promised to go deeper, as well as bigger, with this sequel to the third biggest film of all time. Did he succeed?

Although an impressive, spectacular piece of superhero filmmaking, Age of Ultron is not as good as The Avengers. There are quite a few flaws, not enough to derail the train, but enough to make the journey quite bumpy. What is obvious, pretty much from the first frame, is that Whedon is a much more confident and ambitious filmmaker this time around. Unlike The Avengers, which took place mostly on the Helicarrier, this film has a truly global feel as the Avengers zip around the world chasing after Ultron, leaving a trail of destruction in their wake. I hope Tony has good lawyers because he is going to get sued.

The opening salvo re-introduces each member of the team one by one in an avalanche of action as they battle an army of HYDRA troops in a snowy Sokovia, a completely made up eastern European country. The team are on the hunt for Loki’s staff, which HYDRA’s number one thug, Baron Wolfgang von Strucker, has been using to build advanced weapons and people.  After recovering the staff, Tony discovers it contains an artificial intelligence and decides to use it to complete his Ultron project, obviously never having seen Terminator or the billion other films about A.I.s getting out of control. Faster than you can say “Skynet,” Ultron gains freewill, a massive ego and the desire to bring about the extinction of the human race.

In terms of plot, Age of Ultron doesn't do anything we haven't seen in Marvel movies before. There's a bad guy who wants to destroy the world. The heroes try to stop them. Everything ends with a city getting seriously fucked up. Along the way there's lots of funny lines, in-fighting, team bonding, soul searching, in-jokes, Stan Lee cameos and Samuel L. Jackson telling people to get their shit together. Pretty much everything I want and expect from an Avengers movie. It will be a long time before we get an Avengers movie where they just go see a show on Broadway and talk about it afterwards. Which is real shame because that would be the best film ever.

For Whedon, it is never really about the story (probably because the story is dictated by his Marvel overlords); it has always been about the characters and this was his last opportunity to get inside their heads and really mess them up. The director seems interested in exploring how a hero's fears and doubts can be their own worst enemy and that, for all their awesome powers, this group is still all too human, even the thunder god. He isn't always successful with this. The mental attacks Ultron and Scarlet Witch inflict on the team doesn't go nearly as deep or as dark as Whedon was hoping. Romanov's works quite well, showing us the brutality of her Red Room upbringing, but Thor's come across like a scene from an Asgardian version of Eyes Wide Shut.

The film's greatest strength is its cast. The effortless chemistry between the actors, and the obvious affection they all have for each other, is just infectious. As with the first film, Whedon has the unenviable task of juggling all of these actors and their characters and making sure everyone gets their moment to shine. And as with the first film, he succeeds. Mostly. There’s a definite sense that a lot of character beats have been cut out to get the runtime down to one that will be beneficial to people's bladders. Someone was bound to be Hawkeyed, and this time it was Thor. When he's not smashing things with his hammer, the thunder god disappears for long stretches of time, only to pop back to talk a load of stuff that is mostly just set up for future films. Hawkeye, on the other hand, has a greatly expanded role. I have a feeling Whedon felt bad about giving Jeremy Renner hardly anything to do in the first film and decided to make it up to him with this film by giving Hawkeye a more substantial role with what are without a doubt the best lines of the entire film. The rest of the main players are as great as you would expect them to be, although even Scarlett Johansson and Mark Ruffalo struggle to make the out of nowhere romance between Black Widow and Hulk (what?) work.

As for the newbies, Wanda and Pietro are abilities first, characters second, and accents third. They get one scene to talk about their tragic backstory and explain their motivation, but they never really come alive as (meta)human beings. Paul Bettany, despite less screen time, makes more of an impact as the Vision. This is the first time Bettany has actually appeared in a Marvel film after voicing Stark’s A.I. butler J.A.R.V.I.S. since day one, so he’s no doubt relishing the opportunity. As for Ultron himself, I have to admit that I was a little underwhelmed. There's nothing wrong with James Spader’s performance. His voice – so cold, so smugly intelligent, so incapable of saying anything without it sounding slightly sarcastic – is just perfect for this type of character. But Ultron's personality is nothing more than evil robot 101 with a Pinocchio complex and some Whedonisms thrown in.

Where Age of Ultron does manage to surpass its predecessor is in the action sequences, although the final showdown is just another urban battle between the Avengers and the bad guy's disposable army, which Whedon does manage to add a little bit of a twist to. The film has a lot of fun showing how these different heroes would work together in a fight, how they would combine their varying powers and abilities to battle HYDRA minions or Ultron’s many duplicates. The appeal of these films has always been the thrill of seeing these character interacting with each other, and not just fighting together but hanging out and having fun. One of the best scenes is just everyone at a party, laughing and getting drunk and taking part in childish pissing contests over who has the most awesome girlfriend (sorry, Thor, but the correct answer is Peggy Carter).

Notes and Quotes

— Whedon clearly loves to get his characters in iconic 360 tracking shots.

— Andy Serkis’ entire role is just one big Black Panther prologue. Most of the film is set up for Phase 3 which does hamper things

— Whedon's original cut was three hours plus. An extended version of the film will be released on DVD and Blu-ray along with an alternative ending. Hopefully this will include the cut Loki scene (yes, there is one).

— There is no post credit scene so don't bother staying all the way to the end.

Tony: “Actually, he’s the boss. I just pay for everything and design everything and make everyone look cooler.”

Clint: “The city is flying, we’re fighting an army of robots and I have a bow and arrow. None of this makes sense.”

Maria: “He’s fast and she’s weird.”

Tony: "Shit." Steve: "Language."

Three out of four Asgardian versions of Stanley Kubrick films.

Mark Greig has been writing for Doux Reviews since 2011

[scriptmyth]

Hi! Love your blog! Was wondering what your favorite mythical creatures or god(desses) were? I’ve been really curious lately about these sort of things lately and I just wanna know about some mythical creatures, I know it’s sort of a weird question. Was just curious, thank you!

Hello!

Thank you for the question. We’re thrilled to answer a question about our faves! If you want to know more about any of them please just send in another ask.

I am inordinately fond of the god Enki, he’s a cheeky bugger who spends the whole of Atraharsis obeying his boss, Enlil, to the letter but very much not to the spirit. My favourite part of that myth is when he is forbidden to tell any humans of the coming flood, so he tells the house that Atraharsis just happens to be inside. I also have a soft spot for therianthropes, I don’t really know why, I just do. And, as you could probably guess from the post I wrote a little while ago, I have a fondness for elder gods who are apathetic about humanity. I also feel sorry for the children of Loki, they never did anything to deserve what Odin did to them, and the whole eaten-by-Fenrir thing kind of became a self fulfilling prophecy. You trap someone under a mountain with a sword in their mouth for eons, you really shouldn’t be surprised that they’re pissed when they escape.

Silim,

Utuabzu

Athena has always been my favourite for obvious reasons (daddy’s girl, impenetrable fortress of feminist solitude, mad textile skills) but Dionysus is a close second for favourites. His mystery cult was, in my opinion, one of the most interesting, not least of which because we know very little about it. Add that to the fact that by all accounts, he was a foreign import to the notoriously xenophobic Greeks, and he’s got enough outlier appeal for me.

Bonne chance,

Renée

It’s so hard for me to choose but I really love Japanese yokai. Somehow they manage to be both ludicrous and terrifying at the same time. My absolute favorites are the Kasa-obake (one eyed hopping umbrella yokai with a huge long tongue) and the Shirime (looks like a human crawling around on all fours and has no face but its eye is in its anus).

~Tora

Ask me literally anything about the Hero Twins or the Aztec sun gods and I will be so happy. I love those stories so much and they are so interesting to me. The Hero Twins partially because of how many sets of twins are present and the amount of wild adventures they go on. The Aztec sun gods because…well that story is just amusing like no one’s business in my opinion.

Best wishes,

Ajk’in

I love all types of water sprites and over water creatures, with Slavic rusalka (mermaid) and Japanese kappas in the lead. The mythos and traditions around rusalka are beautiful and kinda horrifying, and also demonstrate to some extent how folklore and literary tradition exchanged ideas throughout the ages. Kappas are just plain weird, and so far as I remember the only way to defeat them is be courteous to them - since they’re courteous themselves, once you bow to them, they bow back, spilling the water out of their heads and dying, which is… kinda wild, but also very neat. Defeat your enemies with courtesy. I’d print this on a T-shirt.

I’m also fond of Tiamat, but mostly for personal reasons like the context where I got familiar with her story, and how it’s employed in Biblical narrative of creation.

- Blue

Pegasus. When I first learned about pegasus, it was from monster manuals and magic cards, which make it seem like there are herds of them stampeding across the skies. The image of a winged horse always awed me. When I learned more about greek mythology, and found out that pegasus wasn’t a race of creatures, but one specific creature, which was born when Perseus cut the head off Medusa, that only made me love the creature more.

Xiander

Bastet. She’s always captured my imagination, and the evolution of her myth reflects interesting aspects about the evolution of religion and cultural trends in ancient Egypt.

Cheers,

Tex

I’m kinda a fan of Cerberus from Greek mythology because of two reasons:

 DOG

his name sounds serious but when you look into it you realize that Hades named his frigging three-headed dog Spot

MR. RAGE

[aion-rsa]

Loki Episode 4 Review: The Nexus Event

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This review contains spoilers for Loki episode 4.

Loki Episode 4

First of all, holy shit!

Ok, now that’s out of the way I have to calm down enough to review Marvel’s Loki, episode 4, “The Nexus Event,” which had me on the edge of my seat until the post-credits scene. During said post-credits scene I was very much out of my seat. I don’t remember when I stood up, but I guess it must have happened at some point in the 0.2 seconds between being overjoyed that Loki wasn’t dead (again!) and seeing Richard E. Grant. But let’s backtrack, because there is so much to talk about before we get there.

The first three episodes of Loki were often divisive. As much as I personally loved them, a quick scroll through the comments section under my reviews revealed that not everyone was as enjoying the series as much as I was. However, many of the complaints I read were about elements of the story that paid off extremely well in Loki episode 4.

Patience is very much a virtue, so if you felt there was value in spending last week’s episode just hanging out with Loki and Sylvie on a doomed moon and getting to know the pair better, you likely got a lot out of their forced separation and the moment they reunited to face off against the “Time-Keepers.” If you enjoyed the weird friendship building between Loki and Mobius in the first two episodes, you probably felt that gut punch when Loki had to watch him die. And if you’ve been deeply suspicious of Renslayer and scoping her office for clues during those TVA admin scenes, you finally had the chance to yell “HA! I KNEW IT!” when she turned out to be a wrong’un.

We started the episode with a little backstory. We got to witness Sylvie being snatched by the TVA as a child and eluding her Variant pruning by a dispassionate Renslayer, but this scene immediately became a bit of a Loki timeline headache: this wasn’t a quick pruning before a Nexus Event hit the redline – Sylvie was born a Loki and lived for quite a few years on Asgard before Renslayer and the TVA stepped in. Questions arising from those events are left unanswered in episode 4, so we’ll have to put them on the backburner for now.

We then snapped back to the “present” when the TVA stepped in to haul Loki and Sylvie out of the Lamentis apocalypse, which ultimately led to Mobius and B-15 facilitating their escape from captivity. We suspected this might happen. What we didn’t know was how it was going to go down, and the answer came in agonizing drips as Mobius and B-15 started to question everything they thought they knew about the TVA and its mission. It was tense af – from B-15 taking Sylvie back to Roxxcart and experiencing some heart-breaking memories of her true past, to Mobius finally realizing that Renslayer was a lying liar from Lietown, it really did feel like these breakthroughs could go either way because – as we are all now very much well aware – Renslayer is anything but stupid.

In episode 4, Renslayer did her best to get rid of Loki and Sylvie, but the duo appeared to have formed quite the bond in their brief time together; a bond that Mobius picked up on fairly quickly after love first saved the day. At this point, it’s time to address the elephant in the room: Loki and Sylvie’s budding relationship. Many of us would have preferred this to stay as more of a sibling thing, and episode 4 appears to be laying the groundwork for a romantic connection, at least on Loki’s part. Whether this show will continue to advance the romance between them remains to be seen, but perhaps we should attempt to strap in for the inevitable here?

Elsewhere, Owen Wilson just continued killing it as Mobius. He and Loki’s friendship has been such a key emotional anchor in this series, and the thrill of watching Mobius connect the dots and finally try to break out of the box the TVA put him in was cut so awfully short by his sudden death at the end of a pruning stick. Just a devastating moment, and one that the show allows Loki to feel deeply, albeit briefly. I really hope this isn’t the last we’ve seen of Wilson in the show, though I’m not sure how he could be worked into further MCU installments if he somehow reappears and makes it to the end. Loki season 2? Fingers crossed, as there’s obviously even more dark shit going on behind the scenes of the TVA yet to come.

So the omnipotent and lizard-like Time-Keepers are nothing but androids, huh? Nothing but a pantomime. Again, this is something that many Marvel fans have anticipated, but who is really behind the TVA, the mythology of the Time-Keepers’ creation, and the dubious nature of the “sacred timeline”? Is it really going to turn out to be Kang the Conqueror? It’s hard to forget that Renslayer is Kang’s girlfriend in Marvel Comics, and Kang is definitely set to make an appearance in the now-filming Ant-Man 3, but I suspect this show has a few big surprises in store for us in its final two episodes.

They’ll have to be big surprises, because episode 4 gave us some huge ones in its final minutes. We had to watch Renslayer kill Loki in the middle of confessing his feelings before Sylvie captured her. Not for nothing, the way Renslayer’s eyes changed when she faced the end may have been easy to miss upon first watch, but it seemed like her death may well have been a mercy. I wonder how much of Renslayer’s villainy is beyond her control.

Then there was that post-credits scene. Marvel, ugh. You got me again. Of course Loki isn’t dead. At the heat death of the universe, the only things left alive will be cockroaches and Tom Hiddleston in full Loki costume running lines. No, Loki got his own “come with me if you want to live” moment instead, and we were introduced to a whole bunch of new Loki Variants who seem to have already figured out how to cheat TVA crackdowns. “Boastful Loki,” “Kid Loki,” “Alligator Loki” – his gold horns I can’t – and “Classic Loki,” none other than Richard E. fucking Grant.

There’s some stuff I haven’t covered here, including Loki’s Time Cell encounter with Lady Sif, and the way in which it forced Loki to address his past behavior and put a stop to yet another cycle of his being a total asshole – this sequence reminded me of Lucifer’s hell loops honestly. There was also the moment we got a first confirmation of vampires in the MCU – Blade is coming! – but it’s hard to focus on everything when my brain is screaming “I CAN’T BELIEVE I HAVE TO WAIT ANOTHER WEEK TO FIND OUT WHAT HAPPENS NEXT.”

Hope you all enjoyed this one. I’m excited to find out.

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The post Loki Episode 4 Review: The Nexus Event appeared first on Den of Geek.

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[smilesthroughfandoms]

The Battle for Mewni: Final Thoughts and also it’s a review... kinda

So after binge watching the aforementioned episode non-stop for a week, I’ve decided to pull all my (cohesive) thoughts on it all together for this post. Buckle up kiddies this is gonna be a long ride.

OK FIRST WE’RE GOING TO START WITH SOMETHING THAT IS AS CLOSE TO AN ACTUAL REVIEW:

Over all the movie event was quite thrilling. There were parts where you can tell the actual episodes will be split. However, at times I thought the pacing was a bit slow (I mean, it was funny to watch, but did we really need all those shots of The Book kicking Ludo’s ass?). Overall it was a great episode! 

Now to get to the nitty gritty of it all.

THE MAGIC HIGH COMMISION OR COUNCIL OR WHATEVER THEY’RE CALLED I FORGET AT THE MOMENT

Ok so Heckapoo, Rhombulous, and Omni are still alive but just need to... recharge? I don’t know. But Lekmet is dead. As in dead and gone, he’s not coming back dead? I’m not gonna lie that saddens me. He was such a good character. Plus, it’s gonna break Rhombulous’s heart. Poor crystal fool. Hopefully his snake arms can calm him down... or Star. Either way. RIP Lekmet.

(Also can we just apppreciate the Queen’s Sanctuary for a moment?)

MOON’S MOTHER 

Just look at her! 

I can definatley see similarities between Moon and this woman, but it looks like Moon inherited some of her looks from her father... whoever that was. Also this Queen has Butterfly cheek marks. Maybe she was the one true Butterfly before Star came along? Idk, I just thought that was cool.

TEEN MOON, TEEN RIVER, AND LORD MILDREW

Look at her!

Look at him!

Look at them!

Also Mildrew... I can kinda see why Moon didn’t marry him.

Kind of a wimp, don’t you think?

TEEN MOON IN GENERAL LIKE HOLY HELL

She lost her mother, who she clearly loved very much, and was thrusted into Queendom at an earlier age than most and was then given the responsbility to end a war by either continuing it or signing a peace treaty.

Me to, girl. Me too.

However, she took initiative and made a metaphorical deal with the devil. And by devil, I mean Eclipsa. And by metaphorically I mean literally.

And used that power to defeat Toffee’s army and excepted her role as Queen.

And props to her for blasting Toffee’s finger as a way to go around her original deal with Eclipsa. Also Mina was there and she wasn’t as crazy... so... cool?

ECLIPSA’S ALIVE AND SHE SEEMS PRETTY CUTE AND ALSO MAYBE EVIL I DON’T KNOW.

Ok we saw as far back Crystal Clear that she might have been in the crystal’s in Rhombulous’s dimension but to actually have confirmation is something else entirely!

I’m not sure if I’d call her evil just yet but she seems to be taking Toffee’s place as main antagonist... I guess I’ll have to wait until November to tell.

(Also the first she wanted once she was unfrozen was a candy bar. Like, same madame. Same)

GLOSSARYCK... THE TRUEST NEUTRAL TROLL SINCE ALEX HIRSCH.

It was nice to see more of Glossaryck showing some emotions (though he said he had no feelings earlier in the series but that doesn’t necessarily mean the same thing)

And I’m impressed how this show handled the book burning.

This makes me glad that Star has started writing down her own book of spells. This means that not only will everyone have a fresh start, but maybe the years and years of prejudice against Monsters by Mewmans will start to fade...

And then their’s Glossaryck’s fate himself. I mean, first we saw him burning in Book Be Gone

(Sorry, this is the best picture I could find)

Now Im not sure if Glossaryck is truly “dead” or if he’ll stay “dead” and hell I’m not even sure where he is or if Star can go get him but... hey we still have another season to figure all this out so... good luck, you neutral jerk...

STAR AND MARCO OMG THEY WERE CO CUTE!!!!!!

Look at all this Starco we got! 

And of course the safe kid finally got his wish to punch Lizard-Loki only after he realized the ass killed Star

While neither really got the chance to actually talk about their feelings for each other (which I’m kind of disappointed they never did) I expect that to be a plot point for future episodes... Also Jackie because I’d love to see more Jarco as well.

*Starco shippers*:

Hey! I’d love to see any of Marco’s relationships fulshed out more! So shut it.

AND BECAUSE I’M GETTING TIRED, THIS WILL BE ONE OF MY FINAL POINTS OF INTEREST

.

.

.

TOFFEE

Just fucking Toffee guys! Ok, first of all. Moontoffee shippers... I don’t care if you ship them... I have LITERALLY seen people ship crazier pairs. I’m not a big fan of it but I can kinda understand the appeal. So... whatever. I don’t care what you people do.

Second, I am a little pissed that Toffee appeared to be nothing more than a plot device. Especially sinc he had so much potential! And now he’s dead. Yeah, sorry conspiracy theorist. His ass is grass. He’s dead. Maybe we’ll see more of him in flashbacks but honestly... I think Eclipsa’s our new baddie. Kind of a let down here, I’m not gonna lie.

Ok, but can we just talk about how petty and extra Toffee was in this entire movie? I mean don’t get me wrong, I’m disappointed that the whole “Missing Finger thing” was nothing more than a petty grudge 

but the fucking lengths he went to get it back. I mean, first Moon blast’s his finger off.

(How has his face not turned into a meme yet?)

“She dramatically chopped off a small finger!”

“All hope is lost!”

(Really Rasticore? I expected more of you...)

And his damn face. Like, it’s not some dramatic afer-battle moment like the tapestry depicted

But more like

*frustrated sigh*

“Well then.”

“This is inconvient.”

And we don’t here from him for at least another twenty years (Hey Star Crew could we get a timeline of events here?). And what does he do once he comes back?

He hires himself into Ludo’s army, convinces them to overthrow Ludo, gets Star to destroy her wand, nearly kills all of Ludo’s army, manipulates Ludo and nearly drives him insane, practically kills the Magic High Commision, taints all of the universe’s magic, practically manipulates Ludo into toppling a majority of Mewni, nearly kills Star, and destroys the Magic Instruction Book...

... just to get his fucking finger back.

How god damn petty do you have to be to go to those lengths just to get one finger back? Like what the hell?

And I’d like to point out that Toffee was a very excellent source for nightmare fuel in these past few episodes like...

Dude

Toffee, stop

This is a kid’s show, Toffee.

toFFEE!

And we can’t forget this little gem:

Not gonna lie, this is the only time I pitied the damn lizard.

All of what Toffee did to me is just so funny. Like in retrospect, the concept of it all just strikes me as hilarious.

And that is the brunt of my final thoughts on the season 3 premiere of Star vs the Forces of Evil, The Battle for Mewni. If you guys have any questions, don’t hesitate to ask. I might come back and update a few theory posts eventually and I’ll definatley update my Star vs episodes in one sentence posts, I just have to watch each episode indivually again to get a better feel for it.

Until then, stay weird and wild fellow fans!

[ssteezyy]

Ask the Cat Doc: Urine Marking, Cardiomyopathy, Chirping Noise, and More

This post contains affiliate links*

Welcome to our regular “Ask the Cat Doc With Dr. Lynn Bahr” segment! Once a month, Dr. Bahr answers as many of your questions as she can, and you can leave new questions for her in a comment.

Dr. Bahr graduated from the University of Georgia College of Veterinary Medicine in 1991. Unlike most veterinarians, she did not grow up knowing that she would become a veterinarian. “It was a cat who got me interested in the practice and I am forever grateful to him,” said Dr. Bahr. Over the course of her veterinary career, Dr. Bahr found that the lifestyle of cats has changed dramatically. As the lifestyle of cats has changed, so did Dr. Bahr’s client education. In addition to finding medical solutions, she also encourages owners to enrich their home environments so that their cats can live long, happy, and healthy lives.

This new understanding led Dr. Bahr to combine her passion for strengthening the human-animal bond with her veterinary background and knowledge of what animals need and want to start her own solution-based cat product company, Dezi & Roo, inspired by two cats of the same names.

For more information about Dezi & Roo and their unique and innovative cat toys, please visit Dezi and Roo on Etsy.

Cat pees over the side of the box

My 7 yr od spayed female Maine Coon mix rescue cat has developed an odd behavior for some time while voiding. She always goes in the box but when facing a certain direction she often (not always) raises her back end mid-stream and ends up voiding on the floor. My vet said she doesn’t know what could be causing it. I have a 4 yr old neutured male too, and there have been no changes to speak of in a long while. She is healthy. Do you have any ideas what could be causing her odd behavior? – Kathleen May

Hi Kathleen, I am so glad to hear that your Maine Coon mix is a healthy girl and that you discussed this issue with your veterinarian first. If her urinalysis was normal, and the likelihood of suffering from cystitis has been ruled out, another medical issue I would consider is the whether or not arthritis is an issue that would cause her to adjust her position while urinating.

However, it sounds more likely to me that she is exhibiting the normal behavior of urine marking. Cats communicate with each other in many ways like scratching, bunting, and urinating. There is a lot of information they garner from from the smell and position of urine and your girl might just be talking to you and the other members of her household. In order to better deal with the urine landing outside of the box I have some suggestions for you. Make sure the litterbox she is using is big enough to accommodate her appropriately, that it is placed in a quiet location, is always kept clean, and that there is more than one litterbox for her to choose from. There are some options for high sided, large boxes, that you can either purchase or fashion yourself from plastic bins.

As long as arthritis is not the issue, we are happy to hear that your girl is otherwise normal and healthy. You may simply need a different style litterbox to help remedy the current situation.

Itchy cat

Hello! I have a rescue cat who is about 6 (no one is exactly sure) who at one point was someone’s pet. Her person died, the family cleared out the house but left pets behind to fend for themselves. Dory, my cat, survived on her own until a kind neighbor called the rescue organization that saved her. She was bloody in the field behind the house. Her face and back of neck raw open wounds. They think a flea collar bridled in her mouth and caused a burn reaction on her pretty face. She now has what I joke are “joker lines” at the sides of her mouth that caused permanent scars up to the apples of her cheeks. The back of her neck has a spot where fur no longer grows but it’s healed and is now healthy skin. I’ve had her for a couple years now; she’s happy and seems healthy overall. We’ve had laser treatment on the skin where the hot spots are, we’ve done steroids, we’ve narrowed food down to cool protein foods feeding only dehydrated food with no byproducts or allergens. She’s had skin biopsy done and everything comes back with no issues to note. The issue is she still scratches, and often. We keep a cone on her most of the time to save her little face. She is inside only, an only cat.

I’m at a loss. I’d like to not pump her full of Prozac or other drugs but fear it’s the only option to stop the phantom pains she seems to feel. Any further suggestion is helpful. – Mandy

Hi Mandy, bless you for giving Dory a loving home. She is a lucky cat. It appears that she has been thoroughly worked up for her issue of scratching but that an answer for the root cause has not been found. How unfortunate for both you and her.

Without the benefit of actually examining her firsthand, it is difficult for me to adequately guide you in this situation. However, going off your description, some of my thoughts involve the possibility of pain from scar tissue similar to what you mentioned about phantom pain. It is well documented in human medicine that scar tissue can cause excruciating and debilitating pain. With this in mind, I would be more apt to prescribe medications specifically for pain, as opposed to medications that alter behavior. I would recommend you seek a pain specialist who will know the best treatment options available for addressing this type of discomfort in your sweet girl. I hope you are able to find the right practitioner who will offer you a treatment plan aimed at alleviating the discomfort of her scar tissue without trying to change her personality. Best of luck to you.

Feeding a feral cat

Dr. Bahr I am feeding a feral cat every morning with 9 lives pate Ocean Whitefish and Bar S Bologna with Chicken and Pork will it hurt her she eats 2-3 slices a day. Thank You – John Wissinger

Hi John, I am so grateful to you for making sure your feral cat is fed every day. I typically recommend feeding a variety of flavors and brands and rotating foods regularly. Your girl is luckier than most by having the benefit of a meal certain every day and what you are doing to make sure she does not go hungry is wonderful. As long as the bologna is not the only nutrition she is receiving, I wouldn’t suggest you change your routine. She is used to it and as long as she appears to be healthy and thriving, I would continue with your regular practice. Has she been spayed? If not, I would encourage you to pursue getting that done asap. That way you won’t have the problem of having to feed more mouths than hers and she will live a longer life.

Chirping noise while purring

Hello Dr. Bahr! We got a new kitty a month ago, she’s a 4 month old british shorthair, everything is ok except for a weird little noise she makes when purring. Its high sound is separate from the purring, it sounds a bit like a bird chirping. I showed my vet an audio of her purring and he listened to her lungs and throat, he suspects the sound comes from the nose. I suspect it too because I can hear the high-pitch noise coming from it. She doesn’t always do it, actually she hasn’t done it as much as she did before, just wondering if you had any more insight or if you think there’s something we should check or worry about. I check her breathing and it seems fine, but I’m very intrigued as to why she’s making that noise! Hope you’re well and thank you for taking the time to answer these questions! – Lucia Faria

Hi Lucia, congratulations on your new bundle of joy! There is nothing better than filling your house with the love of a cat and I wish you both years of happiness together. I am happy to hear that her breathing is fine and that your veterinarian has given her a thorough exam. Since you both suspect the unusual noise is coming from her nose, there could be several possibilities that would cause it. Brachycephalic Airway Syndrome is a medical term given to various upper airway problems found in short-nosed, flat-faced cat breeds. Does your kitty have an unusually short nose or are her nostrils smaller than normal? Stenotic nares and other physical defects like an elongated soft palate or enlarged tonsils would be some things that I would want to make sure are not causing the high-pitched noise. However, with that being said, it appears that your baby is outgrowing her problem because you mentioned that you are hearing it less often. Paws crossed, it totally resolves with age or that it is just something benign and unique to her. Enjoy your special baby and let me know if you have any other concerns.

Cat won’t adjust to harness

My Loki is a Maine Coon cat. He didn’t like being picked up until I bribed him with treats. Now he tolerates being picked up. which is more than I hoped for. He’s a grumpy old man, even tho he’s only 5 years old. He has shown a lot of interest in the outside world. Sometimes I think he’s bored. I bought a Kitty Holster and a leash, and I introduced the harness to him over a period of two weeks. I sprinkled catnip over the harness. I also used the clicker, clicked it and gave Loki a treat every time he came near the harness. He would lie down on the harness, and he didn’t seem bothered by it until I put it on him. Then he cried and refused to move.

I thought that was normal, so after 20 minutes I took the harness off. I’ve put him in the harness several times since then, and the result has been the same. Once I put the Kitty Holster on him and then fed him. He hid for 20 minutes, then he came out and took his usual seat in the window. He roamed around the apartment but he panicked when it was time for me to take the harness off. Each time I talk to him and give him treats but he’s not thrilled with this at all. Afterwards he sometimes acts skittish around me, as though he thinks I’m going to grab him.

I don’t want to torment him. I realize that Loki might not ever adjust to the harness, but I would like to give this a fair try. Do you have any suggestions for me? – Serbella McGee

Hi Serbella, I appreciate you writing in with a common question other readers would like to know more about. Indoor cats certainly do get bored easily and it is hard to keep them active, engaged, and entertained. I commend you for recognizing the problem and trying to give your Loki more activity by attempting to leash train him. However, many cats like him don’t take to harnesses well or appreciate your attempts to get them outdoors safely. It really takes a special personality for a cat to acclimate to a being leash walked and it sounds like Loki is not a fan of it. Because of that, I would not push the issue as it could harm your relationship with him.

Instead, I would attempt to alleviate his boredom in other ways. Open the windows daily and let him smell the outside. Play for 5-10 minutes at a time at least 2-3 times daily. Continue to clicker train him to perform many different acts like getting into his carrier, giving you a high-five, etc. You may explore the option of a kitty backpack or safe stroller to take him outdoors in. I have written several blogs on how to bring the outdoors in and how to make an indoor hunting playground and new ways to eliminate kitty boredom that will help you with creative ideas on ways to keep cats like Loki entertained indoors. It does take effort but is well worth it.

Believe it or not, Loki is exhibiting normal behavior with his displeasure of being picked up. Did you know that most cats view being picked up as something that is dangerous? In the wild, the only time (other than when they were first born) that all four legs would be off the ground at one time is if they were being carried away by a predator. Being picked up equates to being eaten and is a reason to be fearful. Like Loki, many cats learn to tolerate it, but most don’t like it at all. Unless they have been habituated to being picked up from a young age, I recommend people let them sit on their laps or beside them instead. It feels safer and more comfortable from a cat’s point of view.

I hope you feel better knowing that Loki is normal in his response to the harness and I again thank you for bringing this subject up. Getting cats accustomed to leash walking is best accomplished when they are young and more and more owners are attempting this with their kittens. For cats who are well acclimated to it, safely going outside is a wonderful way to add enrichment to their lives and allows them to enjoy fresh air, sunshine and the ability to explore.

Do you have a question for Dr. Bahr? Leave it in a comment!

*FTC Disclosure: The Conscious Cat is a participant in Etsy’s affiliate program. This means that if you decide to purchase through any of our links, we get a small commission. We only spread the word about products and services we’ve either used or would use ourselves.

The post Ask the Cat Doc: Urine Marking, Cardiomyopathy, Chirping Noise, and More appeared first on The Conscious Cat.

[beauregardlionett]

lionness-s twenty-gay-teen reads & recommendations

-- i know that i don’t often talk about the books that i read on this blog, but i felt like i should share some of the incredible queer literature i read this year just in case anyone was looking for a good read! these are all books i’ve read and enjoyed immensely, so i hope that someone else might find as much joy as i did through these novels. happy new year!!

more happy than not by adam silvera

this book fucked me up and i loved every damn second of it. the novel features lgbtqa+, slice of life, and mild sci-fi themes as well as a little bit of violence for anyone who might be sensitive to that last one. i don’t want to say too much on this novel in case i spoil anything, but the gist of it is that there’s a company that was founded to erase/alter memories to make people happier and our main character has to deal with the repercussions of a world in which this possibility exists. personally i thought i knew exactly what was going on in this novel until halfway through when a window got involved and then i had no idea how it was going to end and i loved it

they both die at the end by adam silvera

this book was incredible and i did not want to put it down or have it end. taking place in less than 24 hours, Mateo and Rufus are two teenagers who get the Death Cast call telling them that they’re going to die today. through an app meant for people like them, they find each other and spend their last day alive helping each other through everything thrown at them and making as many memories as possible. featuring themes of lgbtqa+, slice of life, and just enough action to make things heart-racing-edge-of-your-seat interesting, this novel was surprisingly heart-warming despite the title giving the ending away. the story of two kids dying way before they should and helping each other become the person they always wanted to be, this book is definitely worth your time.

the inexplicable logic of my life by benjamin alire-saenz

from the author of Aristotle and Dante Discover the Secrets of the Universe, this books was just as wonderful in my opinion. we follow Sal through his senior year of high school and all the everyday and not-so-everyday trials that come with it. he faces the crisis of writing a college essay that describes who he is as a person when Sal doesn’t even know who he is. but of course, throughout the course of this crazy year, Sal realizes that he has his friends and family to rely on to help him figure out that he’s exactly who he is supposed to be. with themes of lgbtqa+, slice of life, and mild violence, drug use, and other possibly triggering themes, it’s a mundane journey of self-discovery through loss and friendship with a very confused and angry teenager. this book actually brought me to tears at one point, which i NEVER do, so personally i highly recommend this book.

at the edge of the universe by shaun david hutchinson

first of all: i don’t know why i haven’t seen more people talking about this book. it’s fucking incredible. featuring slice of life, lgbtqa+, and slight fantasy themes, i absolutely chewed through this book and couldn’t wait to reach the end to know how everything connected. essentially, Ozzie’s boyfriend Tommy vanishes and he’s the only one to remember that Tommy ever existed in the first place. alongside that, Ozzie has to deal with his slowly crumbling family, finishing high school, figuring out where he wants to go to college and what he wants to do with his life, his friends going in their own directions, and a kid named Calvin who seems intent on making Ozzie’s life that much more complicated. to top it all off, the universe is shrinking.

the ship of the dead by rick riordan

quick note: this book is number three in a series entitled Magnus Chase and the Gods of Asgard and links up with the Percy Jackson universe, so do not start with this book. frankly because the whole Magnus series is actually worth a read! the overall gist of it though, is homeless teenager Magnus Chase dies and finds himself living in the Norse afterlife as a waiting soldier for Ragnarok, or the end of times. his friends go along with him on his journeys to try and put a stop to Loki’s plans of ending the world as they travel throughout the Nine Realms. this series is wonderfully diverse and the perfect combination of witty and grounding that it feels genuine. honestly, i was stunned by the diversity, the lgbtqa+ themes, the mythology, everything! just to give a brief peek, there’s a genderfluid character (who does not utilize they/them but switches between he/him and she/her), a Muslim character, a deaf character, a character who was homeless for a long time, and so much more it’s actually crazy. TOTALLY worth your time.

the six of crows (duology) by leigh bardugo

now i know i’ve seen this duology featured around the site, but if you haven’t read this, you HAVE to check it out. with themes of lgbtqa+, crime, fantasy, magic, and more, it’s a thrilling and beautiful written story of teenage criminals who are exactly that: criminals. there is no redemption story, no moral villian; it’s just crime for the sake of crime. it sounds weird to say, but it’s refreshing to read about criminals that are motivated by the money and nothing else. led by Kaz - a young crime lord with a dark history - a handful of teenagers attempt to breech a legendary, impenetrable prison because they’re offered a large sum of money to do so. dark, thrilling, and witty, this duology is totally worth your time if you love immoral characters.

the raven cycle series by maggie stiefvater

if you’re a book based blog, chances are you’ve seen this series talked about in abundance. the author actually HAS a blog on this site, and she’s quite wonderful at giving advice and posting updates. if you happen to be unfamiliar with the series, it features themes of magic, lgbtqa+, slice of life, and adventure while following the quest of five high school kids on their quest to reawaken a dead Welsh king. taking place in Henrietta, Virginia, this series is an extraordinary read in my opinion that utilizes beautiful language, snarky characters, and a nice dose of reality for anyone looking to go on a great adventure but still feel grounded.

the foxhole court (all for the game series) by nora sakavic

personally, this was my favorite book i read this year. i read it in less than five hours over the course of two days and almost cried when i realized i would have to wait for the other two books to arrive. i heard about it from this site, and i’m so glad i decided to read it, because i fell in love with the story and the problematic, dysfunctional characters before i was even done the first chapter. following the story of Neil Josten through his crazy, dangerous life, the story is realistic but full of thrill and mystery and suspense and Exy. with themes of crime/gangs, lgbtqa+, college, and sports, i absolute flew through this novel and am looking forward to finishing the series.