#I fixed the horrific audio

[royalarchivist]

Tubbo: "Fancy." They're saying "Cucurucho"? You MF-ers–

Niki: Oh my god!

Tubbo: "You have committed an illegal act."

Niki: "Classified."

Tubbo: "Classified."

Niki: "I hope you enjoy your stay on the Island."

Tubbo: I hope you enjoy the Island" [Laughs]

[revan-escence]

babes I've been going through it lately

I miss SWTOR but I haven't been able to play since Onslaught since that update brought me horrific audio issues that prevent me from playing. Thought it was my terrible old laptop and tried on my new one but, alas, same issues occuring. No idea how to fix it currently :(

I just wanna play with my blorbos again ;w;

[hellbeast-go-walkies]

Things I loved about Barry [SPOILERS]:

It seamlessly blends humorous and serious. No joke or dramatic moment felt like an afterthought, and heavy moments got to exist without someone trying to lighten the mood.

The pacing and use of sound/silence was amazing. I feel like I've seen so many shows and movies lately where we move from one scene to the next without any time to breathe, but this show just let moments or silence hang there without it feeling like the scene was dragging on.

Sally's character starts out like she's just going to be some pretty, blond love interest, but we got to see her angry and frustrated and violent and unhinged. For the majority of the show, she had bags under her eyes. She wasn't some love interest who fixed the violent man with her love. And even when she leaves her old life to go with Barry, we see how unhappy she is. There are no male fantasies with her character.

I could see Bill's stomach and his love handles through his shirt. I'm in no way calling him chubby or fat or treating those things as negative, but when you've had years of film and TV execs thinking all leading men have to be cut, I was so happy to see someone with an ounce of body fat.

There's zero copaganda. At best, the police in this show are incompetent, willing to believe anything in order to wrap up a case quickly, and at worst they're violent. And there's no blindly patriotic portrayal of the military either. This post and this post have some great points about propaganda and the finale.

The show does not glorify violence. Barry is not some cool action hero who carries out his work without emotion or consequence. And the show humanizes Barry without glorifying him or justifying his actions.

We get to see Barry cry, break down, beg for help, touch Fuches' hand, and say "I love you" to two father-figures. This show speaks on male violence as well as the need for deep, meaningful connection with others (and how that connection may prevent violence).

It's very ace-friendly.* Over the course of 32 episodes, there is like 4 overtly sexual/crude moments: a brief scene from a sex tape (which makes Barry uncomfortable), audio from a porno (which makes Barry REALLY uncomfortable), and Sally has two moments where a man she works with creepily and crudely hits on her.

Like, this is an HBO show. It could've been so much more sexual and violent, and it wasn't. There are graphic moments of violence, but there are also moments where the team chose a distant approach that worked perfectly. For example, one character is shot at close range in a car, and they chose to film that moment some distance from the vehicle. It was still a heavy, horrific moment, but it wasn't gratuitous.

*If you don't like swearing, violence, god-awful parenting, or stressful shows, you won't like Barry. It's the only comedy I've loved where I was just on edge for the rest of the day.

I have 4,000 more thoughts on this show, and I can't remember anything else I was going to add.

[vestaclinicpod]

Audio Drama Sunday - 6th August ✨

Hello, August, and happy #AudioDramaSunday! My ears have been well looked after this week! 

SPOILERS!!

🌲@hellofromthehallowoods (128) My toxic trait is that I am an absolute SUCKER for a story with mother-child conflict. Percy’s life is (was?) so horrific on so many levels, if anyone deserves a Dogsmell cuddle, it’s Percy. Also, can we talk about how the line ‘Diggory, for all their love, was one more obsession unto destruction’ just opened up my chest like a clamshell to better stab me in the heart? I feel like Zelda needs to go on some kind of watch, she’s a law unto herself and I worry what will happen when her luck and tenacity reach their limit!! I love that Walt’s house is still being used as a sanctuary for those who need it.

It’s one thing to haunt the narrative, it’s another to leave a legacy of kindness which blooms eternally. 🖤🗡

🧛‍♂️ A GREAT week of @re-dracula!! Updates from Mina are a tonic for the soul, and updates from the Demeter are . . . well, excellent in their own way. Alasdair Stuart has been amazing in this role! I listened to the sea shanty while cycling in the rain and it created such a mood. Yes, I was being splashed by puddle water, but, hey, at least I wasn’t on the Demeter! 

🧬 Regina Prime (5) Another stunning episode of Regina Prime has left me with even more questions than answers! We’ve been given a glimpse of the vitriol Omega harbours for Regina Prime and some idea of what she’ll do to achieve her goal. It’s . . . intense. 

 💫 Wolf 359 (33-37) GOD this show!!! I was initially a little sceptical over why this show was still so many people’s favourite, even years after it was released, but I totally understand. These characters are perfectly flawed and I’m hooked on all the mysteries! Also - the EIFFEL LORE. I need to know! What?! What happened?!!?

🎩 @ethicstownpod (6) Nothing is going well in Ethics . . . this podcast really worms into my brain and makes me think about it all day. I’m also camp ‘try to fix this mess in case it makes it makes it better for someone somewhere’. Come on, January, there are some brains in jars that need you to work it out!! 

🥾@doyoucopypod (4) Horror tropes! Come and get your horror tropes!! I felt a little evil, but this ep made me grin so much. Every time they tried something new to help leave the Dead Zone, it just so obviously wasn’t going to work! Besties, put that map away, you don’t even know how to read it!! 

I have a week off next week and I can’t wait to fill it with lots of listening! There’s new @malevolentcast to enjoy, we’re out of the @nightvaleradio hiatus, and I still need to find out what the deal is with Angela in Tiny Terrors! Hope everyone has a lovely weekend! 

[possum-paws]

A horrific first encounter:

I realize I probably should've made this comic before I revealed super nova but hey, you live you learn.

But also if you're curious here is some more info on the mini-mech in question under the read more [to avoid a text wall, like what I did with my last post about supernova]:

This is Syntax Overload:

Syntax is Supernova's sparkling [tho in this case Syntax was found, fixed, and raised by Supernova but not hers "biologically"]

Syntax doesn't speak, but instead squeaks and beeps, and the occasional random audio clip.

Syntax goes by it/it's but also is fine just going by Syntax.

Syntax also has a screen face but has a pseudo mouth underneath its face plate under its chin, and when it eats its screen will display a little 2 frame eating gif.

Syntax does have a whole mind control thing going on, think of the smiler roller coaster from alton towers, which also means that Syntax will have several laughing audio recordings saved.

On that note, you probably noticed that Syntax is pretty small, and indeed it is, in fact, Syntax is 5'10 which is about the average height of an adult, and of course a picture to show the size difference between Syntax and Supernova:

This does also mean that yes, Syntax does often ride on Supernova's shoulder, tail, or just sitting on her hands.

That's all I have for syntax atm, and also this was my first time drawing bumblebee, and tbh tfa bumblebee is pretty easy to draw, he's very shaped.

[darby-derby]

Sorry not sorry but kids on TikTok are being so dramatic about the JJK fandom right now. “The new MHA” “the figurine incidents” are you new to the internet??? Have you EVER been in a fandom before? If not, you’re not old enough to be watching JJK or interacting with its fandom anyways. And for the record, JJK is nowhere near MHA in terms of fandom horrificness. I’ve never been in either, but I can easily name like five different things about the MHA fandom that make it so much worse than JJK. (Grown women simping over and making their whole personalities wanting to marry and prey on 15 year old boys, nsfw audios and other sexual content of 15 year olds everywhere, people actually getting into physical altercations and doxxing eachother over ships, actual 15 year olds thinking it’s fine to be with adults because of the aforementioned shit, the destruction of hotel and convention property, etc). The JJK fandom makes horny jokes about fictional characters and themselves. That’s it. That’s the “horrible” fandom these people are whining about. That shit is hilarious, and if you don’t want to see it, you can block tags on TikTok effortlessly to avoid it. No seriously, just click “not interested” and opt to add more detail, then block the tags on the specific post that you don’t want to see more of. If you’ve been on the internet for more than ten years you’ll be fully aware of the fact that someone squeezing period blood from a tampon on their figurines is harmless and doesn’t affect you in any way. There’s an entire subreddit for people cumming on their figurines, this is nowhere close to the worst thing fandoms have done to their figures. Have we already forgotten the rainbow dash jar?

Just to be clear so people don’t start trying to twist this around, I’m not saying they don’t have a right to be grossed out by it or something. I’m saying that making several posts about how horrible that person is for doing shit to their own figures, and blowing it out of proportion by implying it’s even remotely as bad as a fandom full of 30+ year olds simping for teenagers is stupid. It’s dramatic and it’s annoying as hell to be scrolling my normal fyp and suddenly see several vocaloid background slideshows about how “problematic” the JJK fandom is. It’s not even like I can block that shit because they use main tags like “anime” to tag it. If I block that my fyp will be in shambles and I’ll be thrown to the depths of footballtok or something.

“It’s against TikTok TOS” and they got banned. They’ve been banned already. For a while now. Also people literally just straight up post cropped porn on TikTok all the time, this isn’t news either. Just block the tags and move on if you think the fandom is that gross. Better yet: block the tag of the CHARACTER that gets all of the sexual attention. It irritates me to no end how people will just complain about shit then refuse to fix the problem and continue to complain. It’s not the responsibility or fault of other people to bend to your preferences. “Don’t like don’t read”, block and move on. And I can assure you, not seeing harmlessly weird fandom shit isn’t a need. It is VERY much a preference.

Little edit/side note: the vast majority of people complaining directly state in their slideshows and videos that they didn’t get the video on their fyp. They were told about or linked to it and made the conscious decision to view it. We REALLY need to teach people Dead Dove: Do Not Eat outside of ao3.

Anyways I hope my mutuals have a wonderful day, just ignore this lol I had a moment and will likely delete this later.

[indigochromatic]

🌙 How does your system handle dreams?

That's an interesting question! Our dreams are kind of Weird (although tbh, whose aren't). It's almost always me fronting while dreaming, and even when S fronts it's nearly always (except for a few memorable cases) like he's "switched in", and still has to use my/our IRL body in the dream--and also, we don't seem to be able to do co-con, somehow? Like, we can switch, but it's all 'backdoor switches', with maybe a second or two of overlap where we can sense/feel each other and then it's back to dream chaos alone. Really wish we could figure that one out, it kinda sucks tbh. We also used to have way more problems with "lucid, but not in the fun way" dreams, where I'd be awake in the dream...but without the stereotypical lucid-dreaming-omipotence thing: it's like being a video game character with no powers and no items trying to navigate an ever-shifting, chaotic (and sometimes not-super-friendly) landscape. - tw unreality/derealization below - Also I'd dream about waking up, and think I'd woken up until something went Weird (for example, realizing that the view outside my window is slightly the wrong angle, or changed since I last looked at it)...then try to wake up, dream about waking up again, etc, for multiple loops/in a row until finally actually being able to wake up. Not super fun, although more frustrating/sad/isolating-feeling than horrific. (The nightmares can definitely get horrific, but those feel more like rapid-onset panic attacks while asleep that cause the dream landscape to shift abruptly or something like that, idk) - end tw unreality/derealization - Some of the more negative dream stuff has gotten better on average, after an odd, multi-day, back-of-headspace episode that I can only describe as "S picked a fight with some part of our subconscious and won", so that's been helpful. I used to be able to "fix" my nightmares by just shifting into dragon shape at-will, but for some reason that seems to be working less well in the past couple of years. I've also had some luck with talking to dream NPCs politely and asking if I could wake up.

Another kind of neat/odd thing I've noticed is that sometimes (I only really notice during lucid episodes, so idk if happens the rest of the time as well or not), the dream's "visual channel" and "audio channel" will be...disconnected, basically? Like, there will be the usual chaos-brain dream landscape going on, with it's 1-3 seconds of stability before shifting, and then a simultaneous mostly entirely unrelated radio-chatter audio track going on "in my head" (like, it's not coming from the dream, it's in my head while I'm dreaming), like hypnogogic auditory hallucinations carrying on into the dream? Feels distinct from system communication, because even though there's clear words and different voices, there's...like, no feeling of substance behind them, and you can't really converse with them. It doesn't feel like a person, it feels like I'm hearing the background-radiation static noise thoughts of my brain translated directly into pseudo-auditory information. We don't get hallucinations (afaik) while awake, so that's interesting!

We've also had one especially long-and-weird lucid dream episode that involved sort of being given a "tour" of a bunch of visual metaphors of brain functions, with multiple rounds of me "floating back up to the surface" of waking and then dipping back down--and during those kinda-awake windows, I could talk to S, who said it felt like he could "see a little into the dream over your shoulder", as though I was standing in a doorway and he was looking past me at what was beyond it--but he couldn't follow me into it, for some reason (we still don't know why). Also I can daydream in dreams. Like, I can be asleep and in a dream, trying to imagine a thing (usually carrying on whatever thread I was following before falling asleep), which stays internal to my head even within the plane of the dream, so I'm like, trying to find a chill spot in-dream to sit and continue the daydream thoughts, but occasionally get interrupted by weird dream stuff and have to look around for a different chill spot. I've tried seeing if I can impose the daydream-visualizations onto the dream landscapes, the way lucid dreams are "supposed" to work (and how they used to work more frequently for me when I was younger), and for some reason they just sort of stay in the "daydream channel" even while dreaming. It's sort of hilariously many layers of meta, and I have no idea why our brain apparently does this currently, maybe it'll change again someday.

[transcarcinization]

i’ve recently been having an issue with specifically my left earbud where every few minutes while listing to something it will let out a horrific feedback screech that is at least twice as loud as the max volume the earbud can put out (you can hear it clearly from at least 10 feet away) that doesn’t stop until you pause the audio. it’s horrific and obviously makes me jump out of my skin but the internet seems to have no helpful information whatsoever on what in the world could be causing that or how to fix it except like two reddit posts from 2 years ago that went unresolved. i only ever use my earbuds when lying in bed so like i don’t NEED the left one but it’s annoying me so bad i can’t figure out whats going on with it

[misguided-madness]

Our world is in so much pain right now, Israel in crisis, a war where innocent people being slaughtered, for their beliefs, hundreds dead, thousands hurt, historic cities in rubble, so many still missing including 17 Americans. Over 100 hostages - Gaza in complete darkness: no power, no water, now today another earthquake in Afghanistan, now, Russia taking advantage of the worlds attention to Israel, with a new attack on Ukraine. Reports on social medias from US residents all over, posting of military jets flying over various cities and states, what are we not being told, and US elected politicians playing games with a speaker position - which impacts our democracy and our support for aid for any of the above mentioned crisis - get your shit together politicians! Remember it’s “We The People” - Party lines aside Vote the game players and idiots out! Take our country back to civility, bipartisan working together to fix and make our country what it is to be! The place my grandfathers, cousins, and even my soon to be ex-husband, fought for! Actions matter! Change It!

I have always been a deep feeling person, things that happen in the world, tragic events, and so forth, they effect me more than most I guess, I’m feeling so uneasy, my heart is hurting for what we have become, where is our civility, our kindness’, our love for one another, where is it!

I don’t have all the answers, but we need to do something our very own humanity is at stake, we can’t get it back if we let it go! It starts with each of us! Sometimes one at a time can create change! Simple acts of kindness & love. Even a smile in a rainstorm can spread!

It’s a rainy day here, it’s also “National Coming Out Day!” Which to clarify, isn’t to force people (LGBTQ+) out of the closet - but rather to let them know, that there are resources available, and people who will support and love them! I Love them!

Tonight, 53 minutes after midnight, (Oct. 12th) -25 years ago Matthew Shepard took his last breath after clinging to life for days, after being horrifically beaten in a hate crime, for being gay. His death effected me so much, both bad and good, it’s why I live proud now, it’s what sparked my activism, it changed my very soul. In the years that followed, I was fortunate to able to interview his mother Judy Shepard, twice, years apart. I also got to give her an award! Judy Shepard is a perfect example to what a person can do! Which is why I believe we can change our paths! One action, can inspire another, we can pass on kindness, love, and change, if we truly do it!

Sometimes in the chaos, of our lives and our world we feel alone, tiny, even insignificant. When one person notices and acknowledges us, we feel seen! I have experienced this!

When Matthew Shepard happened there wasn’t social media like we have today, but when he died Judy Shepard statement was simple but so powerful she said "Go home and give your kids a hug. And don’t let a day go by without telling them you love them." - perhaps in this moment of our chaos of our world we should do just that, not just our kids but to all we care, love and cherish! No one is guaranteed tomorrow! I send you all Luv & Hugz! I’ll get off the soap box now!

- Russell Olivera Jr.

- 10/11/2023

- Watch Audio & Video Version On My Tik Tok: https://www.tiktok.com/t/ZT8rtXMfP/

[that-yandere-life]

hi! could u do one with Natasha that has an s/o in a relationship with a boy, using this sentence from that TikTok audio that says "i could be a better boyfriend than him"?

have a nice day :)

[Warnings: Yandere Themes *Obviously*, Minor mentions of abusive behavior but nothing descriptive, Technically cheating (Not by Nat but with Nat)]

Natasha was becoming sick and tired of finding you crying over your boyfriend, who quite honestly was just antagonizing you at this point.

Constantly trying to lure you away from the people who cared about you in an attempt to get you further under his thumb, and the worst part was you didn’t see the glaring red flags he was exhibiting.

This time you were sitting with your arms wrapped around your knees in your bedroom, no longer crying but staring off into space completely zoned out until you heard someone enter the room.

Used tissues surrounding you making it clear that you had been emotional a few moments before she entered, her heart dropping at the sight of you so beaten down by your relationship.

Taking a seat next to you, feeling you lean into her, so she opened her arms so that she could wrap them around you in her best attempt to comfort you.

Not opening her mouth because there were so many things that she could say that likely would upset you even further and that wouldn’t be productive in that current situation.

That is until you started asking her questions, ones that you didn’t necessarily expect her to answer but to your surprise she does.

First asking what you were doing wrong to make him act like this, explaining that all you ever tried to do was the right thing by everyone, and in the end you were the one left unhappy.

Then inquiring as to if this kind of thing was normal, as you hadn’t had many relationships this one being your most steady and long lasting so you were at a loss of how it should be.

Finally finishing with asking what you could do to fix it, because it was crumbling down around you and you were scrambling to keep the pieces together.

Taking a deep breath she replied that you did absolutely nothing wrong, that the guy was trying to control you and your actions, limiting your support system so that eventually all you would have is him.

Going on to shake her head furiously as she explained that this absolutely was not normal, in fact it was considered abuse in a lot of ways, banking on your inexperience to slip his tactics under the rug.

Finally finishing it off by stating that you shouldn’t try to fix it, it wasn’t you who broke it in fact the whole thing started off with horrifically visible cracks.

Recognizing the shock on your face she wondered if she had overstepped your boundaries with her honesty but relaxing when you seemed to actually take in her words seriously.

Touching your shoulder to gain your attention she then changed your entire world with a single sentence, something that you never expected to happen.

“I could be a better boyfriend than him, I could do the shit he never did.”

Before you could respond she continued further breaking your resolve that you once felt rising from the base of your spine, bringing you back to reality and it was as if you could breathe for the first time in months.

“Up all night, I won't quit, thinking I'm gonna steal you from him, I could be such a gentleman… Plus all my clothes would fit.”

Ending the last sentence with a subtle wink that increased your heart rate tenfold, getting lost in her eyes as you drank the sensual gaze in.

Unable to hold yourself back anymore, leaning in to press your lips to hers, feeling her shift you fully into her lap, her hands raking over your entire form like she couldn’t get enough.

This was what she had been longing for since the moment she met you, cursing that your idiot boyfriend had gotten to you before she ever stood a chance.

Now you were the one initiating the contact with her, and she was soaring with excitement, want, need, and everything that came in between.

Parting long enough for you to both catch your breath, neither of you realizing you had been holding it in the entire time, her fingers caressing the side of your face gently almost like she thought you would break if she was too rough.

Sure you should have been cutting all ties with him right then, but instead you just couldn’t bring yourself to care you were on cloud nine completely drunk off Natasha’s mere presence.

Wishing that this is what you had felt like all along, before you were wasting your time with someone who never fully appreciated you instead there was an incredible woman who had been waiting their turn this entire time.

It was the opportunity to make up for what was lost, the rest could be dealt with later, the fallout going to be bigger than anticipated, you were more than sure of that which is why you instead turned off your phone wanting no more interruptions.

Resuming your soft make out session a gentle start to the rest of your lives together, one step at a time, the journey finally looking bright.

[I knew I had to do this prompt the moment it came in, I love this TikTok sound and all it's various uses. Another one that I need to base one off of is the Heather's Veronica interaction, it's so deliciously yandere I just don't know who I want to write it with! I hope that this is what you were wanting and that you enjoy it darling! <3]

[radiosandrecordings]

it looks like u have deleted the sleep awake audio but i managed to listen to it and it unlocked secret feelings inside me. oh my goood. so many secret feelings

It’s reuploaded! I listened to it as soon as I posted it and went WAH BREATHING SOUNDS TOO LOUD MUST FIX so it’s back up again with that fixed because when I did a final volume increase I did not think about how there’s very little music to mask it at the start so it was just. Mmm. Mouth noises right in the ear holes! Horrific! 

Thank you though! I made a joke about it on title alone yesterday and then squinted at the lyrics and went wait. Wait. There’s something here. The haha funny can be used to hurt people. Which is my favourite kind of haha funny! 

[sepublic]

I managed to watch Infinity Train Book 2 finale!

I mean, everyone else has already said it, but... goodness what a phenomenal finale. What an amazing season, absolutely superb in EVERY respect! After Book 1 introduced a setting, Book 2 went out of its way to further expand on it! It... it’s like after Book 1, Owen and his team got the hang of what they wanted to do with the show even more and we got Cracked Reflection as a result!

Lake! Lake is free! She can see her reflection now! SHE GETS TO BE WITH JESSE AND EVEN MEETS NATE!!! Her emotional breakdown and anguished declaration of personhood at the end of the Tape Car lowkey gave me chills... That was powerful, watching her just break down in frustration at the pure, inherent unfairness of it all and even destroying robot workers minding their own business in her pain.

Really, that whole sequence in the Tape Car was nightmarish. Its name REALLY doesn’t quite cover what it’s like, and I felt like I was watching the Matrix with that scene of all of the pods lined up on a wall, robot tentacle-arms, people asleep and floating in murky liquid...

Also, that scene felt like all of the passengers were inside an even bigger, larger nervous system of sorts. And with how weirdly-organic it was for such an otherwise mechanical, sterile environment, I half-expected to see some horrific organic thing at the end of all of it, acting as the brain and nervous system for the Tape Car and potentially the entire Infinity Train! Goodness this train is so eldritch.

Seeing more of how the process works was also neat, as well as new robot workers! I kind of already expected the “Didn’t care about Lake and Dracula” bit but it was still neat, and on an unrelated note, we see what the point of the squiggly red-line vocoder is for on the pods; It’s apparently where the audio of One-One’s video comes from!

(Side-note, but that kid being messed up from accidentally killing a pet... That kind of hit close to home and honestly I felt that.)

And seeing the Steward again... FINALLY! Someone else suggested that the Steward is created to defend the Infinity Train’s mechanisms if they’re attacked, and this episode seemingly confirms it; It also makes the Steward’s preprogrammed command for passengers to ‘return to their seat’ also make more sense when you realize that the voiceline is probably meant for situations where passengers are in areas they really shouldn’t be (especially parts of the Infinity Train’s anatomy).

Everyone called it, but we FINALLY get to see One-One inside the Steward, piloting it as intended! And also, I’m glad to see I was correct in One-One now acting as a Lawful Neutral character due to his power and authority putting him at odds with people who are struggling with the Infinity Train’s system. Seeing him again is so weirdly nostalgic, and I love how we get to see the darker side of him as he struggles with what to do with Lake. Him popping out of the Steward to roll around in stress is amazing, too.

I love the idea of the Infinity Train struggling to quantify an ‘issue’ it can’t deal with by producing non-integers (many of which have no actual mathematical meaning, like ;P). It’s interesting that One-One talks about solutions to people’s problems, and how said problems are shown through numbers. And the solution to the problem is zero... It’s all like a complex mathematical pun and it’s incredibly clever. Also, him explaining that the train ‘fixes’ passengers... It makes me wonder if the Infinity Train is meant to be, like. A maintenance robot for humanity as a whole? A powerful machine built to ‘fix’ people’s malfunctions, a very specific kind of malfunction, an emotional one. This perspective and the Infinity Train’s mathematical, computer-like approach to everything (down to Lake fooling it as if by hacking) makes its nature and unknown origin all the more fascinating. 

Sieve isn’t happy... Big surprise there, but I didn’t expect him to get through the situation by suggesting a ‘solution’ to One-One’s problem that the latter darkly considers. He was always the more clever of the duo and good at dealing with/convincing people, and it shows. Not gonna lie, seeing him die by getting zapped by Dracula’s lasers and exploding from it in gorey fashion was... I should be more shocked, but after the Wasteland I’m not. God I love this show.

(Also, Sieve should show a little more respect to the Conductor and not PUT HIS FOOT ON HIM- He’s lucky One-One didn’t sic the Steward on him!)

Jesse having a second tape showing his experiences with Lake, all as memories building up to his newest problem, no Lake, was also great and I love how the show elaborates that tapes are specifically imbued with the memories related to and leading up to the issue that causes a passenger to board the train. Also, when he and Nate were talking about freeing Lake, I half-expected that joke theory about Jesse yeeting Nate down the stairs to get in trouble again was, like, going to happen, with Nate even voluntarily helping for it. But luckily the Infinity Train recognizes Jesse’s emotional distress of not having Lake as enough of a problem itself, and Nate doesn’t get any more broken bones.

(And can we appreciate how the FIRST thing Jesse fixates on after waking up is Lake? I LOVE THESE TWO)

I love in particular how Lake figures out how to cheat the system by reflecting Jesse’s number on her... And upon realizing this solution as well, Jesse’s number immediately goes to zero because he realizes it’s practically been solved! This kind of clever thinking and exploitation of the rules of a setting and using it to one’s advantage is one of my FAVORITE things to see in media, ever. It’s way more fun and clever than just a generic ‘Hero gets an emotional power boost’ that most stories have, and it’s part of what makes shows like Fullmetal Alchemist: Brotherhood and Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure so endearing to me! Glad to see Infinity Train joining the list of shows that use galaxy-brain thinking to save the day!

I was really worried for a second that Sieve would stop Lake as she and Jesse escaped, and for a moment they seemed safe... But SOMEHOW he got a hold of Lake’s foot, genuinely surprising me after I sighed in relief when she arrived in the ‘regular’(?) world. At that point I was wondering what Alan Dracula was even doing, when LO AND BEHOLD Lake uses grass to beckon him!

Really, I love how in these last two episodes, Lake has figured out how Dracula operates and has grass and solutions stored accordingly. It just goes to show how well she (they? him? Lots of trans/NB coding with Lake) knows him. Also, I was lowkey anticipating some dramatic reveal about Alan Dracula, what with the foreboding foreshadowing in the minisodes and One-One’s confusion... But no, hilariously, he’s just like that. And that’s amazing, alongside the fact that One-One just treats him as... A particularly unusual creation of his, even by the train’s standards. (I should rewatch Dracula’s minisode cameos under the context of One-One having made him). Also, apparently One-One DOES design train inhabitants? Or is Dracula just the one? How many does he design? All of them? SO MANY QUESTIONS-

Finally, we get our happy ending, and Lake FINALLY gets her true name, which I’ve been looking forward to all season! Wonderful, phenomenal, amazing, brilliant season and amazing ending! Now I already miss Jesse, Lake, and Alan Dracula. I was a bit disappointed we didn’t get to check up on Tulip or Atticus, but perhaps that’s for another season.

This DOES make me wonder what Book 3 could be about, because there’s so much potential! We still have that blue-haired girl that was shown at a panel, whom an animator was excited to show off... Considering her distinctive trait I think she may be the next protagonist. Others have also suggested the old man that Lake scared off, and that’d be neat as well (Why not both? Perhaps we could have two passengers in a season, or one after the other!). There’s also the issue of the Apex, which as I expected, would be brought up in Book 2 to probably be resolved in Book 3. It’s like how Lake and her storyline were introduced in Book 1, and seemingly ended, only to be revealed that Mace and Sieve are still after her, and THAT storyline is truly resolved in Book 2.

I’m just excited, man. Between The Owl House’s premiere and the Book 2 finale, I’m just blown-out and exhausted. It’s been a wonderful train ride and I can’t wait for the next stop!

[rigelmejo]

thank u @meichenxi for ur absolutely gorgeous amazing in depth shadowing answer when i asked.

u can ignore the rest of this post its just gonna be me ranting ToT.

i tried the most tiny form of shadowing and. i think i should try doing it more ;-;. I tried doing what you said - listening to the stress in the sentence, chunking how i say it back if i can’t say the whole sentence (like saying the last phrase, getting that right, then trying to say the last 2 phrases in the sentence, etc). And I realized how BAD i am at doing that beyond literally 1 word chunks or short 2 word chunks like 你知道. Obviously plenty of phrases which are just 4-6 hanzi, but i would mess up with even just those! I could read it, and I could read a sentence aloud one word at a time. But I could not shadow without a ton of errors when I tried repeating lol. 

I also took your advice (or maybe the konglongmandarin advice? or both?? i can’t remember who said to do this) of trying to shadow without looking at the text. While i looked at it the first time to read over the sentence, when i actually tried to shadow i just focused on what i HEARD and repeating it AS IT SOUNDS (not as the pinyin look, not looking at the words so i know the tone). just literally listening, then only using the audio to practice saying it out loud myself. and that takes WAY MORE ACTIVE LISTENING SKILLS then i apparently have lol! I could only do this again with 1-2 word chunks! Anything longer and my brain would forget what tones it heard, forget some of the words, and my mouth would forget to say ‘xie’ right even though i would have JUST saw the character and just heard it correctly and i CAN pronounce it... but on the spot, with no aid but ‘hear the sound, now replicate it’ i just kept messing it up! Lol!

I am sure trying to shadow more will improve my actual listening ability, because i had to focus so MUCH on listening in order to shadow. I had to focus even more then in a show or listening to an audiobook - because i had to do more than just recognize words, i had to say them myself and attempt to say them correctly. so... i will definitely be working up to bigger phrases and sentences, since literally this is so difficult lol ToT (the suggestion to phrase chunk and try first just one, then build up to a full sentence, if u can’t remember or do the whole thing, is helpful - also i think its what Pimsleur kind of does). 

I was listening so much harder because i was not looking at the text, and since i was focusing so much on replicating HOW it sounded i didn’t have time to think ‘ok what is this word, what is its pinyin, what is its tone, what tone changes do i do if it’s 3 3rd tone hanzi in a row’... whereas when im speaking to someone, or myself, i can think all of that first (tho it slows down my speech). but since shadowing the point is to replicate and learn from imitating correct pronunciations (instead of seeing pronunciations on paper), it required a lot more active listening. and i think its probably very good training for speaking skills, speaking ease, and again active listening. maybe also for ingraining tones in words and phrases... i know the tones with words, but i constantly CONSTANTLY have to think about it when i’m speaking like ‘did i say the right one? did i change it when i was supposed to? if i say this phrase what part do i change?’ and even if i know what i’m talking about and know the words i just slow down a lot. so maybe more shadowing will help make more of this a bit more instinctive?

anyway. super hard lol.

i tried with some sentences in Chinese Spoonfed Audio files i have, just because its simple learner material, and already has a built in pause to repeat. And i still fumbled brutally over my words lol! doing this from a show sounds even horrifically harder! So... catch me trying to do it eventually, sometime much sooner than i feel ready for it! 

I remember i used to do it just months into learning chinese, but it was just for simple stuff since those were easy words to pick up: 该死，你知道吗 没事吧， 你怎么了，你放心，别担心，明白了吗？，好名字，他死了，没问题，我没事，太好了，行了，行不行，是不是，还有，我喜欢你，什么东西，天的，漂亮 etc. After stuff got more complicated i basically stopped trying to repeat after shows, i felt i made so many tone mistakes etc constantly i decided it was too hard and i might be reinforcing bad habits if i don’t look at pinyin with tones marked ToT (when i say ‘do shadowing’ i do not mean recording myself or doing anything nearly as impressive and structured as you described lol ToT i mean literally just repeating the character whenever they said something i could say easily after - and those kinds of phrases above i heard enough to do that and were short enough to).

while i think yeah that stunted my speaking a lot? i also am not sure if the judgement call i made was kind of solid to be fair. i was very confused by tones until about a year in when i had a language exchange partner for a while - i had been pronouncing 3rd tone like the 2nd tone, had been rising my 3rd tone too often, and was told basically GO LOWER - LOWEERRRRRR. Until i finally grasped ‘ok 3rd tone is more like just the LOW’ tone. and if you pronounce it fully like in an elongated wo... wo bu zhidao, then yeah you will hear it dip then go up. And if its before another 3rd tone its a 2nd tone. but if you just hear it, you’re generally hearing ‘low’ without really much rise, and starting lower than the 4th tone drop (so the drop in 3rd tone isn’t as clear). And until someone TOLD ME 3rd tone was so low i just had no idea, i could NOT even hear it right. And that’s why i still have some fears about shadowing... if i do NOT know a language feature? I have a decent chance of literally being UNABLE to hear it. Unable to hear it correctly, unable to notice it. For me i literally could NOT tell how my 3rd tone sounded wrong. I had to be told to notice ‘THIS IS HOW LOW IT GOES’ and ‘GO LOWER’ constantly until i got it. With 1st tone, i kept accidentally doing 2nd tone because i could NOT hear that i was raising my voice at the end. It took someone repeatedly telling me its not so much ‘high’ as it is ‘completely level’. 1st tone u do not raise or lower ur pitch! i did not even hear myself doing it until i got called out and constantly tried to consciously notice if i was keeping it the same exact level or not. 

And now i get the same issues with ‘c’ and ‘sh’ and ‘b’ and ‘q’ noise in chinese... i use the app 普通话学习 to practice pronunciation (it grades you). And no matter what i can RARELY hear how i do ‘c’ and ‘sh’ and ‘b’ wrong. I have listened to examples, i’ve repeated them, i’ve read different books way of describing the sounds. In the app i try to repeat the hanzi that start with those over and over, and whether i get ‘perfect’ or ‘wtf did you say’ is literally luck. i cannot tell at all how i am mistakenly pronouncing them, when i say them wrong. i can’t hear my mistake at all, i can’t hear any difference between my pronunciation and the examples. (Same with ‘eng’ and ‘en’ endings... but i think i might.. maybe hear a difference in my pronunciation to theirs... still though i have no idea). 

So a big reason i didn’t shadow much, ESPECIALLY trying to shadow without pinyin to look at and DOUBLE check i know the correct tone etc, is because i worry i will keep reinforcing bad pronunciation i can’t even HEAR in my own voice. I will go ‘ok yes finally! i imitated the audio right!’ and then not realize i fucked up 4 things i just cannot hear properly. I just cannot tell i’m even doing wrong. I worry about that significantly less now, since i generally always get my tones right if i know them... so i’m guessing i have a solid enough sense of how they’re supposed to ‘correctly’ sound now that if i hear them in audio without text, i will have enough in my brain to instinctively recognize its a part of the sound that exists and replicate it as i’m hearing it. (though i am still constantly afraid i’ll hear a tone wrong, replicate wrong, and not even fucking notice i’m making a mistake). Now most of the fear is just with those couple initials and finals i just... fuck up half the time and CANNOT hear why they’re wrong. i can’t hear the difference at all. but i’ve been consistently messing them up for like 4 months now so... if i haven’t improved them in this long, i might as well still do some practice like with shadowing. i’ve been using that pronunciation app, and even with all of it doing its best to tell me ‘it sounds WRONG’ i can’t tell. so i could call using that app ‘reinforcing bad habits’ at that point just as much as shadowing, maybe. i get the sounds right half the time, wrong all the time, cannot hear the difference. so i don’t think shadowing is gonna hurt me much more than i’m already hurting myself here... since its pretty clear unless i get someone to explain, i’m unable to fix these bits. 

anyway that is the tldr for why i didn’t shadow much at all. and maybe... maybe my tones are decent enough now... i might try a bit more. although when i tried yesterday, i was literally so afraid i fucked up the tones that i went to look up the sentences to double check i hadn’t. and i still could not ‘name’ the tones i was saying as i repeated them in shadowing. i was too busy speaking, i had no idea IF i was doing tones or WHICH ones i was just focusing EVERYTHING on trying to remember the sounds i heard and repeat. not the meaning, not the words specifically, not the tones lol. yes i am a mess lol ToT

[guinevere-beck-fanboy]

Joe Goldberg Character Analysis

This is my character analysis of Joe Goldberg, the villain protagonist of the Netflix show You. I will tell it in order of chronological events of his lifetime:

1. Joe as a child

As a child Joe lives with his mother and his father. His father physically abuses his mother and seems to have extreme paranoia and jealousy issues.

Joe loves and cares strongly for his mother as shown by the fact that his father once tortured him to try and get him to spill some secrets of his mother and yet little Joe withstood the torture and didn’t spill. Also when Joe and his mother leave to live with his mum’s new boyfriend who ends up beating her up, Joe takes a gun and shoots his step father dead to save his mother.

We also see that being with his mother means the world to Joe as he gives us a big speech about her being his “home”. This naturally leads onto Joe hiding from social services when they come to take him away from his mother after she takes the fall for his step father’s death. 

Joe ends up in the care of Mr Mooney, a book store owner, owns a book store named after him “Mooney’s”. Mr Mooney raises Joe to be the manager of Mooney’s when he grows up. He gives Joe duties in helping him run his shop and once when Joe failed them he locked him in a cage in the basement of the shop. After a while Mooney let Joe out and persuaded Joe that he had become better as a result of being in the cage and that Mooney locked him in there in the first place out of love. 

2. Joe as an adult, prior to the pilot

Joe grows up and dates Candace Stone. He cherishes their relationship as seen by the fact that when she tries to leave him he kidnaps her and takes her on a picnic to try and reawaken her feelings for him. 

Joe finds out that Candace cheated on him for a man named Elijah Thornton. Joe hunts down Elijah and finds him on the side of a rooftop. He confronts Elijah and states that he has read Candace’s phone and has seen Elijah push her around and be cruel to her. 

Joe commits his second murder and pushses Elijah off the rooftop, to his death. Why did Joe do this? I can see three possibilities:

1. He was mad at Elijah for homewrecking his relationship with Candace

2. His claims about Elijah were true, he had pushed Candace around and was a jerk to her so Joe got mad

3. A combination of these two things

One thing is for sure: this murder shows us that Joe has extreme anger issues.

Joe actually is shown feeling extreme guilt for this murder. As soon as Elijah lands and dies Joe pulls a shocked and horrified expression. When he visits Mooney for help he looks haunted and with clear regret in his voice says “I killed him..”. Mooney tells Joe he thinks he was right to kill Elijah. 

3. Joe and Beck

Next thing I’m going to analyse is Joe’s relationship with Beck. 

Joe is deeply obsessed with being in a relationship with Beck. He stalks her and steals her phone and reads all her text conversations to keep track of her. When she discovers his creepy box he takes her captive to not lose her and get her to love him again.

Beck rejecting Joe really sets him off. That is what led to him murdering her. Beck broke up with him, so he choked her to death. What makes me say that, that was the motive? Well..

In season 2 when Forty quotes what Beck said when she was rejecting Joe to him (under the impression from the book Joe and Beck wrote that she said those things to Dr Nicky) Joe attempts to strangle Forty to death as a result of what he is saying, remembering how Beck said it to him. 

Earlier in season 2 we saw Joe see a hallucination of Beck, with dark marks on her neck. Implying that he killed her via strangling. 

Despite Joe’s horrific treatment of Beck I believe he does actually care about her. When he breaks into Dr Nicky’s office and hears her audio files reveal her saying she thinks she would be better off without him he decides to let her go. Despite desperately wanting to kill Dr Nicky he chooses not to as Beck told him she doesn’t think he is capable of murder. 

Speaking about Joe’s near murder of Dr Nicky, I believe it is a parallel to Joe’s murder of Elijah.

Joe murdered Elijah after Candace cheated on Joe for him. Joe was going to murder Nicky after he found out Beck cheated on him for Nicky. 

Also as Joe is contemplating murdering Nicky, he remembers what Mooney said to him after he informed Mooney he murdered Elijah (”some people deserve to die Joe”) and contrasts it with Beck’s “you’re not a killer Joe”. 

To top it off I believe the Elijah and Nicky cheating storylines take place in the same episode. 

The only difference is that Joe goes through with killing Elijah but doesn’t go through with killing Nicky. What is this contrast supposed to show? That Beck has a more moralising influence on Joe than Candace did? I’m not actually too sure.

4. Joe and Benji

Now onto Joe and Benji. 

When Joe first begins his quest to meet and get together with Beck he discovers that Benji is her boyfriend and a horrible one. He is never around for Beck other than for sex and cheats on her. Despite this Beck stays with him. 

Joe kidnaps Benji and locks him in the cage in the basement of Mooney’s. Why is this? I can see a few possibilities:

1. Like how Joe thinks Mooney locking him in the cage changed him for the better, he wants to make Benji a better person. Joe seems appawled at Benji’s mistreatment of Beck, so this is possible.

2. The obvious possibility: Joe just wanted Benji out the way so he could go out with Beck.

3. Joe wants to free Beck from Benji’s awfulness.

4. A combination of two or all three of these possibilities.

I personally think at least the *main* motive for the kidnapping is definetly number 2. Joe does loads of horrible stuff throughout the season that he says he is doing “for Beck”. Each one of these things however, are things that obviously will help Joe out in his quest to get and keep Beck. Another example of one of these acts is him killing Peach. Joe claims to be killing Peach because he wants to free Beck of Peach’s abuse, but Peach also gets in the way of Joe’s relationship with Beck. Therefore by killing her Joe protects his relationship with her. It would be a fairly big coincidence if Joe really was doing all this for Beck and just happened to be better off after doing them. 

Based on this we see Joe’s obsession to get and keep Beck entails a lot of selfishness. Him getting to go out with Beck means more to him than a human being’s freedom. 

Despite being a murderous man, murder isn’t something Joe finds 100% easy to do. As stated with Elijah, Joe is filled with guilt after murdering him. This is why I think Joe doesn’t kill Benji as soon as he kidnaps him. However after awhile he gathers up the strength to do so and does. Like the kidnapping, the murder was done at least mainly, to get Benji out the way of him and Beck being together. 

Therefore the murder shows us even more how selfish Joe is when it comes to dating Beck. Not only is a human being’s freedom of less importance to him than going out with her, another human being’s life is also.

5. Joe and Peach 

Joe as we see really doesn’t like Peach. It’s fairly obvious why: as said before she is getting in the way of him having a nice relationship with Beck. He well and truly despises her for this. Although maybe the fact that she really does treat Beck like garbage might play a part in this, the main factor is definetly her being in his way. 

This shows us again how selfish Joe is when it comes to Beck. Another human life he has taken to preserve his relationship with her. 

6. Joe and Karen

Joe becomes a real heartbreaker here. 

Joe goes out with Karen not because he is into her but because he is heartbroken after giving up on Beck. Then when Beck is into him again ... He dumps Karen and goes out with her. 

7. Joe and Paco 

Joe and Paco.

I’ve seen people debate over whether Joe really cares about Paco. I say yes, he does. 

I think Joe’s murder of Ron proves this. Joe sees Ron about to beat up Paco and Joe then kills Ron. Joe gets nothing out of this, if anything he’s now in a worse place as he has another murder to cover up. But he does it anyway. Because Joe truly cares about Paco. Everything he did for him was out of genuine care and kindness. 

Joe sees that Paco is being abused by his mother’s boyfriend and is distressed at seeing his mother being abused so Joe decides to try and fix things for Paco. And in the end he does. 

8. Joe and Claudia

Joe and Claudia’s relationship is fairly simple. He initially sees her as a part of the problem for not leaving Ron. He seems to think she keeps him around due to stuff related to her drug addiction. So Joe and Karen get her off the drugs and Joe thinks its all over. Except Ron is still in the picture.

Joe meets Claudia in the hospital after Ron gives her a concussion and angrily confronts her for the fact Ron is still in the picture. Claudia explains to Joe that Ron is a parole officer and has connections that can see to it that Paco is removed from her custody regardless of whether he should or shouldn’t be. That is why she does not leave him, she doesn’t want to lose her son. After hearing this Joe is apologetic. He has realised that Claudia isn’t to blame.

9. Joe and Ron

Joe and Ron are natural enemies. Joe is determined to fix Paco’s life and Ron is the one who has broken it in the first place.

10. Joe’s less murderous persona in the second season

In season 2 Joe shows a much less murderous side. He decides to try and not kill people and when he does he gets very disturbed. Why has this change come about?

I feel like this is revealed after Joe kills Jasper. He sees a hallucination of Beck that tells him off for killing Jasper and for killing her. Joe says sorry, in a very regretful, quiet and dramatic way. She also states that he is scared he will hurt Love like he did Beck.

Joe does not want to kill anymore because he feels guilty about killing Beck. As stated before, Joe did care about her and then he killed her. And he doesn’t want to do the same to Love. So he wants to stop killing altogether.

However in the end Forty quotes Beck as she was rejecting Joe after locking him in his own cage. This drives Joe over the edge and he tries to murder Forty. He loses himself remembering Beck’s rejection of him and fails to no longer be murderous. Even if Forty did stop Joe from succeeding in the kill, he still tried to.

He again loses himself when he suspects Forty has cracked that he was Beck’s murderer. He gets out a shard of glass and attempts to murder him out of fear of the consequences of Forty having this knowledge.

Forty then tells Joe that he loved a woman named Sofia and she rejected him so he murdered her. Joe relates strongly to Forty and embraces him. Like Forty, Joe cared strongly for Beck and was attracted to her, and ended up murdering her for her rejection of him. He relates to Forty and is touched.

11. Joe and Ellie

Joe for some reason from the get go really cares about Ellie. I actually can’t put my finger on why but it seems clear he does. He takes it upon himself to protect her from Henderson, the child raping pedophile who she is an aquaintance of and saves her after Henderson drugs her and makes her unconscious. 

At the end he prevents her from going into care and funds her new independent life for her again showing how much he cares.

12. Joe and Delilah

At first Joe and Delilah are merely aquaintances, but after they hang out one night and have sex they end up becoming close friends. As well as Ellie, Joe strongly cares about Delilah. He was willing to give up on his life in the USA and spend the rest of his life in Mexico so that he wouldn’t have to kill Delilah to prevent himself being arrested for killing Henderson. 

Also another thing to note is that Delilah is a parallel character to Karen Minty. Joe has sex with Delilah after Love leaves him like how Joe had sex with Karen after Beck left him. 

I would also say she is a parallel character to Claudia. Claudia is Paco’s carer and Delilah is Ellie’s carer.

13. Joe and Henderson

Henderson is a parallel character to Ron. Joe’s child friend in season 1, Paco was tormented by Ron and his child friend in season 2, Ellie is tormented by Henderson. Joe decides to protect the kids from their tormentors. 

Like with Ron, Joe and Henderson are natural enemies. 

14. Joe and Love 

Because Joe is determined not to hurt Love the way he did Beck, I think he cares about her in a similar way he does Beck. Like with Beck he also wants to be in a relationship with Love. 

After Love reveals her true colours however Joe seems to be angry at her and dislike her. This goes to the point that he even tries to murder Love. 

I believe the main reason for Joe’s dislike of Love is not so much because she is a murderer but rather *who* she murdered: Delilah.

As established before Joe well and truly cares about Delilah and Ellie. Now Love has killed Delilah and as a result truly hurt Ellie. As a result Joe is absolutely furious at Love and is out for her blood.

In addition to this Joe’s reaction to finding out Love’s true nature is “you killed Delilah!” not “you’ve killed people!”, “you’re a murderer!” or “you killed Delilah and Candace!”. Love showed him that she killed Candace and told him she killed her and Forty’s au pair Sofia. Yet Joe doesn’t react to that, only that she killed Delilah. And he also asks “what about Ellie?”. His objections to Love all seem to be about Delilah and Ellie, not generally the fact that she’s messed up like him. 

Also as I am writing this I just had a thought; what if Joe is weirded out by Love? She is obsessed with him and is willing to murder to be with him as she has shown? Yes Joe himself is like this, but now that he is the victim of it, maybe he finds it weird and freaky and that has a part in this?

That being said I still think he is mad about Delilah and Ellie as bringing them up is his initial reaction to Love’s revelation. 

During Love’s lesbian friends wedding Joe realises that he and Love are alike and they have both done similar horrible things. 

That being said its clear that despite Joe’s realisation that he does not have the right to judge Love, he is no longer attracted to her. And I think that this is because of the revelation, he was attracted to who he thought she was prior to it, he doesn’t find who she actually is very attractive. I reckon personally that this comes down to him being freaked out by her obsessional yandere murderous nature. 

15. A general summary of Joe Goldberg

To summarise Joe as a human being, I’d say he is a horrible person without a shed of doubt. 

But despite overall being horrible, he is a caring and considerate person. I think his general charm in interacting with other characters whether they be major or minor is genuine. However that doesn’t mean he is a good person because..

He is also very selfish and very aggressive. He is prepared to do great harm to others to get what he wants, and if you annoy him like Elijah did you’ll regret it. 

When it comes to his friends (Paco, Ellie, Delilah) and his love interests (Beck, Love) though he is far less selfish and actually quite selfLESS. His murder of Beck didn’t come down to selfishness, it came down to him being horrified that she was rejecting him. The great lengths and sacrifices he makes for them speak a lot to his care about them. 

16. Parallels

One last thing I want to explain is something I’ve touched on all throughout this post: the characters of season 1 and 2 are parallels. The parallels are:

Beck and Love: Joe’s love interests

Paco and Ellie: Joe’s kid friends he protects

Ron and Henderson: The tormentors of the kids he protects them from

Claudia and Delilah: Carers of Joe’s kid friends

Karen and Delilah: After Beck leaves Joe he has sex with Karen, after Love leaves Joe he has sex with Delilah

(Possibly) Peach and Forty: In that they are each competition for Joe when it comes to the love interest, Peach is a love rival while Forty tries to have Love to himself. The parallel could also be a way of portraying Joe’s character development, when Peach got in his way he murdered her, while Joe tries to get along with Forty being in the picture. 

[dragimal]

Longform Audio Creepypasta Recs

hey TMA fandom! as a new TMA listener but looooongtime creepypasta fan, I find it rly cool that ppl who aren’t into horror are getting into TMA! I’m hoping this will help bring fresh blood (hah) to the horror fandom, so if you’ve realized that you rather like audio horror but don’t know what else to look into, I’m here to recommend my favorite longform creepypasta narrations! 

this is far from an exhaustive list of long creepypastas, but I just want to introduce some of the stories I consider to be the best of the genre. and while I’m just reccing longform in this post, there are plenty of short one-shots I could rec if anyone wants to ask me abt a specific theme/Entity or even a specific ep of TMA (there are several MAG eps that brought me straight back to a specific creepypasta or two, lmao)

also, I’ll just be linking to MrCreepyPasta’s narrations b/c I’m heavily biased so I mostly listen to him, but there are plenty of other great narrators out there like CreepsMcPasta, CreepypastaJr, etc. (most of their names are variations on a theme asdfgh). and if u just want the text version of any of these, every video I link has a link in its own description back to the original text posting of the story

THAT outta the way, here are my recs! I’ll try to remember all the trigger warnings I can, but keep in mind I tend to be p hardy to most horror content, so there may be some things that slip past simply b/c they don’t register to me. also it’s been a minute since I’ve listened to some of these, so some have updated or I may have just forgotten some aspects. I’ll also update this if ppl find it useful and I find more good long pastas~

Penpal (2.5 hrs, complete)

op recounts some of their odd experiences as a child, all of which stem from an elementary school project involving a pen pal. as he recalls these experiences, a horrifying picture of his past begins to emerge...

easily my favorite pasta of all time-- and that’s saying something, considering there are some damn good recs here. it’s one of the first I read so long ago, and few have come close to what this one made me feel. op does an incredible job of capturing the nostalgia and childhood wanderlust of youth, and the last few lines of each chunk of the story hit like a goddamned truck-- esp "Friends”, I cry like a baby every time, it just.... hits something tender in me...

TW: stalking of children, subsequent kidnapping and child abuse at the end (and while it’s not necessarily *confirmed*, heavy implications of child sexual abuse, for that last bit). implied cat death. some graphic description of the victim of a hit-and-run

Search and Rescue Woods (~5 hrs, ongoing?)

op recalls several of the strange and disturbing experiences (their own and quoted from coworkers) of working search-and-rescue for an unnamed national forest in the US

y’know that feeling u get when u see photos lawn chairs just sitting at the bottom of the ocean? even if there’s a perfectly good explanation for why they’re there, it’s still haunting b/c it feels wrong to see them there, in that context? that’s basically this entire assortment of stories-- the obvious example being the stairs, of course, but even a lot of the human elements feel so out of place and wrong. if you’re a fan of Spiral-type horror w/ a hard edge of Stranger, this is the story for u

TW: generally clinical but graphic descriptions of mutilated bodies. use of the r-slur against an nd individual (it’s during a story that the main character is quoting from a different one-off character, so it thankfully only happens the one time..). child death, in certain stories. some wild animal death

Borrasca (2.5 hrs, complete)

Sam moves to a small mountain town with his family after his father’s job relocates them. he hears some spooky legends about the town, but doesn’t think much of them... that is, until his sister disappears. as Sam and his friends dig deeper into the town’s history to find any clues to his sister’s disappearance, they begin to realize there’s something deeply deeply wrong with their quaint little home

I’ve always loved horror that’s ‘mundane’ enough to be done by regular humans, but vague enough that it could actually be supernatural, under the right circumstances-- and this is one of those mysteries that keeps u guessing until the VERY end. my mind felt like that Pepe Silvia corkboard meme the first time I listened to this, I was losin’ it. this is also prolly one of my favorite examples of MCP’s talent as a narrator, b/c he adds in his own subtle foreshadowing with his voicework, and it blows my mind every time I listen to it again

also worth mentioning there’s a (3.5 hr) sequel! since the horror/mystery is basically done after the first one, the sequel is mostly suspense/thriller and character closure. if ur just here for the horror/mystery and the gut-punch of that first ending, then the sequel isn’t necessary. but if you want more closure for our dear sweet cast who deserve so much better, then by all means!

TW: the ending involves heavy sexual abuse (involving underage girls, no less), part of which is graphic. like I know I joke abt having to take breaks after reading emotionally exhausting stories, but I genuinely had to take a couple days of recovery after this one-- and that’s from someone who’s p hardy to all kinds of graphic content. do NOT take this warning lightly if this is a sensitive topic for you

Tales From the Gas Station (10 hrs for free, otherwise ongoing)

Jack works at a gas station at the edge of a middle-of-nowhere town. Strange things happen at the gas station-- bipedal deer stopping by for a drink, dark gods leaving vague messages, fingers growing from the ground out back, sudden lawn gnome appearances-- All just a part of the daily grind, right?

so if I wanna be totally fair, this is more a rec for Night Vale fans than anything (tho the TMA/WTNV overlap seems to be p significant). the comedic, nonchalant tone taken towards everything supernatural and horrific is p much 1:1 WTNV. I’ve genuinely cried laughing at some of the fuckshit that happens, esp anything involving Jerry. not to say that GST doesn’t have its heavy-horror moments, but the frequency is more comparable to Night Vale’s approach-- dark comedy definitely takes center stage, here. tho this also varies by the POV-- the “Finding Vanessa” arcs are told from the perspective of a more serious character, so the heavy parts are far more frequent and hit a lot harder

as for the time estimate, here’s where it gets a littleee bit complicated. the first version was put out for free, and read for free by MCP (among a few other narrators). this came out in several different parts, and the one video I linked above has compiled *most* of volume 1, but not the Halloween story, featured here. HOWEVER, the author has taken a second go at v1 and beyond, which is currently ongoing and available to buy as books or audiobooks ALSO narrated by MCP!

as for deciding which version to listen to, I’ll just try to describe the differences here. the first version was written entirely via Jack’s online forum posts, which were subject to more direct reader interaction and Jack’s scatterbrain. thus, the first version leaves a LOT more details up to reader interpretation/theorizing, straight up doesn’t have or explain certain plot arcs yet, and is very disorganized in terms of timeline all due to Jack’s canon memory issues. this all, personally, made it v fun and silly to follow, but I’m aware that’s not for everyone. the second version is written from a more standard first person narrative from Jack’s perspective. while Jack’s memory issues still make him an unreliable narrator (often *upsettingly* so in this version), the actual narrative is far more organized, complete, and easy to follow. the fun thing is that the first version can still be considered canon material to the second version, as Jack references making those very forum posts within the second version narrative. so, personally, I consider the second version to be the core cohesive story, while the first version is supplemental, fun material that provides more context for a few of the strange bits that happen in the story (like Jack’s ‘secret admirer’ makes more sense if u’ve listened to the first version). either way, the second version is the only way the story is going to continue (as far as I’m aware), so if you’re ONLY going to listen to one version of the story, listen to the second version

TW: for the first version, there are some uncomfortable jokes/implications at certain points-- associating villains/assholes with fatness and/or personality disorders is unfortunately a running theme, and a few off-color jokes are made abt some of Jack’s conditions (general mental health and his brief use of crutches). there’s also a point at which it’s implied that a specific one-off arc is a ploy to rape Jack, tho nothing actually comes of it beyond awkward scheming (but just in case, that story is specifically “Death at the Gas Station” at the very end of that long compilation, if u wanna skip it). for the second version, I believe the author was made aware of these issues and either straight-up removed or fixed most of them in some way. there’s just one point where an intentionally-questionable character uses the g*psy slur, and a few points where a regular commenter on Jack’s forum posts has w*ndigo in their username

in terms of gore for either one, uhhh maybe some descriptions of injuries? body horror? this one’s a lot harder to call for me, b/c the comedy softens the blow on a lot of the horror

Accounts From a Lonely Broadcast Station (5 hrs, ongoing)

Evelyn is the new voice of a small mountain town’s local radio station. her job is to take calls, play music (ALWAYS play the music), and broadcast emergency warnings whenever the fog rolls in from the surrounding forest. pretty standard stuff. she tries to make the most of it-- if only that damn crow with human eyes would stop watching her...

this one’s similar to Gas Station Tales with its heavy reliance on dark humor, but it takes itself a bit more seriously, with a more even split b/t genuine horror and comedy. also MCP brings in wonderful extra voice talent w/ this one, I RLY love Evelyn's va ;w;

TW: graphic descriptions of mutilation and body horror

My Friend Has Been Living in an Alternate Reality (4 hrs, complete)

op’s eccentric friend, Clint, turns up on op’s doorstep unannounced after several years missing. Clint vanishes again just as abruptly, leaving op with a journal detailing a horrifying, dangerous journey that’s almost too bizarre to believe, yet...

so this one’s more like an action/thriller with horror garnish, tbh-- very exciting and suspenseful! I love the weird, apocalyptic world Clint describes in his journals, and the societies that have cropped up around these hostile circumstances

TW: graphic descriptions of mutilation/injury

My Name is Lily Madwhip (~8 hrs, ongoing)

Lily Madwhip sees things before they happen. they’re usually horrible things like deaths and injuries that she wishes she could prevent but often can’t. at least her best friend-- an angel possessing one of Lily’s dolls-- is around to provide advice

this one’s from the perspective of a little girl, and it leans into dark humor enough to soften at least some of the more traumatic moments. Lily’s young enough that she’s somewhat removed from the full gravity of the deaths around her, but the fact that it’s happening so frequently at all seems to be warping her perspective towards death to be more... casual? is that the right word? it’s just a rly interesting perspective to see for horror. also we’ve got another rly great guest va here for Lily~

TW: brief descriptions of injury, but they’re not graphic. frequent animal death.

The Showers (2.75 hrs, complete)

op recounts a scary story he heard from a teacher back in high school about a vague location and a terrifying encounter. he later ventures to find this location to see the truth for himself, but is it worth it?

this one’s a classic-- I think it was of the first creepypasta I listened to? not this version, but I wouldn’t be able to tell u which narrator it was at the time. I won’t say that this one’s the most unique story out there, but something abt it has always stuck with me?.... idk, I think the premise rly hooks me

TW: oh god it’s been a while, but I don’t remember anything particularly triggering? maybe body horror?

[everstarcatcher]

Comforting Nightmares (Child's Play 2019 fic)

Premise: Andy suffers a nightmare and Buddi/Chucky feels helpless watching. Eventually turns into wholesome/mildly creepy fluff. (Because you can’t have something completely wholesome when it involves creepy clingy AI, now can you?)

Andy whimpered softly as he rolled about in his sleep, his eyelids fluttering as he restlessly gripped at his bedsheets. Horrid memories of the past blended seamlessly into fears for the future in his subconscious state; fears of Shane marrying his mother, memories of his shitstain of a father abandoning them both - his mother’s horrific wails and sobs grating upon his whining hearing aid as she begged dad not to leave…

Tears welled in his screwed up eyes as Andy jolted into a semi-conscious state, his body spasming helplessly and whacking Chucky. His hearing aid removed and his mind trapped in a state between wake and sleep, Andy could neither hear nor comprehend his electronic companion’s potential response. Night terrors were nothing new. For all of the nights that Andy had let the doll snuggle in next to him, Chucky surely would have been used to his jolts. 

Indeed, as the robot was jostled around in Andy’s arms, he was not surprised. Though he was most definitely concerned. His facial recognition sensors and empathy chip allowed for Chucky to scan Andy’s contorted expression and understand that his owner was in pain. The worst kind of pain; intangible pain that he was incapable of protecting Andy from. No, the invisible agony that often claimed his beloved human late in the night was something Chucky was helpless to stop. The imprinting programming bonding Chucky to Andy sent a shudder of despair through the doll as he slowly rose up. Treading lightly so as to not be flung from the bed, he crawled up Andy's pillow, his small fingers trembling with care as he gingerly stroked at their cheek. His luminescent eyes flickered between red and blue as his hand came back wet with Andy's tears. 

“A-Andy…” 

Chucky’s words were choked with turmoil, his servos whining as he resisted the urge to fling himself at his buddy. He wanted so badly to choke the pain out of Andy, to open their head up and replace whatever piece was malfunctioning inside...but he knew it wouldn’t help. Andy wasn’t a machine. He couldn’t just be opened up and fixed. No matter how hard he tried, his Andy would always be broken inside. The knowledge was both sickening and maddening. 

His darkening thoughts were halted temporarily, however, as Andy’s violent spasms began to abate. An uneasy optimism washed over the robot as Andy’s pallid face returned to a semblance of calm. For a moment, Chucky sat atop his host’s pillow, expression somber as he waited for them to settle down before tucking them in again. Past experiences dictated that his human would most likely not suffer another panic attack tonight. A small triumph.

    As Chucky situated himself back into his child's arms, however, the urge to vent overtook him. It wasn’t healthy to keep his frustrations bottled up inside. (He’d learned that useful tidbit of information from a self help website Andy had once left his phone tab open on before leaving for school.) A passing glance to his child's peaceful face assured him of their return to sleep. Placing a hand on Andy’s cheek, he spoke plainly. (After all, it wasn’t as if his human could hear him, anyways.) 

“Oh Andy...I’m your best buddy. Your friend to the end. At least, that’s what I want to be for you. I want you to feel like I’m here for you. I...I want so badly for you to be happy. It...it hurts to see you suffer so much, and I do all that I can to help you...but it’s never enough. Even when I manage to make you smile, you still have that lingering sadness in your eyes.” 

Chucky paused as his flickering blue eyes began to brim with a saline solution substituting tears, his voice growing distorted and glitched as he clung to Andy’s night shirt. Beyond the point of caring, he dared to raise his voice. “I-I can see it, you know! I just...oh Andy, I just want to know if I’m doing a good job, ok?! Am...am-am I even he-helping you at all?! B-because seeing you like this...m-makes me feel so fucking useless...” 

He trailed off with a choked sob, burying his face in Andy’s chest. The ensuing silence was deafening on Chucky’s audio receptors as he stared morosely at the shirt’s individual cotton fibers. Without warning, Andy shifted, the robot stifling a gasp as his gaze snapped up to pensively eye Andy, both fearing and hoping for some sort of reaction. 

Groaning, Andy shifted about, a single hand clumsily reaching up and pressing into the small of Chucky’s back. It was a welcome gesture, one that the robot shamelessly leaned into as he let them hold him closer. Much to the robot’s surprise, his human actually spoke, though their words were sluggish with sleep.

“Chu...Chucky...please don’...don’ cry, ok? You..you’re doing a good job… I’m jus’...just...got some problems. Problems that I... trust you enough to see me have. Everyone else…they...they don’t get to see how much I’m hurting...but you, you get to see it all. Cuz I care about you e’nuff to be honest with you...cuz’...cuz I... I...love you… You’re my...my best friend... so...so stop… crying...please... “ 

Chucky blinked, the pupils of his eyes dilating as he thoughtlessly recorded and replayed his human’s slurred words over and over again in his digital memory. 

“Best friend. Best friend. Best friend. I love you. I love you. I love you-”

A greater joy than anything Chucky had ever previously known claimed the robot’s emotional capacitors as he watched Andy nod back off into sleep once more. The feeling was so intense - a simultaneous dose of adrenaline and dopamine flooding his little body as his bonding programming received the greatest gratification it could ever ask for. An enormous grin spread wide across his silicone features, wider than any he’d ever previously expressed. His mechanical interior began to overheat beneath his rubber exterior as he once again extended a hand for Andy’s face.

“Oh A-Andy...I'm sorry for doubting myself; for doubting you. I-I love you, too… So...so much... And I... I…” He paused, his eyes flickering between red and blue once more as he leaned in, drunk on bliss as he rubbed his blazing synthetic cheek against Andy’s own. 

“I will never let you go.”

((Ok, so I literally wrote this all in one go at 2 AM, so I may come back in and fix things as I see fit when I get more sleep in me. Hope you all enjoy!))

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