#I haven’t been worried about notes but I’m sad rn

[wroteclassicaly]

I’m not sure if I’m gonna do my planned series anymore. No one was interested when I announced it, and I’m losing steam. I don’t feel a passion that much when I post, and I was excited today, but my blurb fell flat. Idk… I guess it just feels like my work doesn’t have a chance because I’m not a bigger blog.

[ray-ray-writings]

UMM THIS

https://vm.tiktok.com/ZMe24dvmM/

Im sorry I know you are packed and busy but can I make a request based on that video?? BECAUSE HOT DAM JUST WILBUR ENTERING LIKE

‘WHAT IS THIS I HEARD ABOUT HURTING Y/N AND TOMMY ‘

LOOK AT THAT VIDEO LOOK AT IT AND TELL ME YOU ARENT SIMPING TO THAT MAN

I simply cannot tell you that because it would be untrue because I am SIMPING so hard…. Also this was way longer and had a lot more plot than I originally planned so…. There’s that lol. Hope you enjoy. (P.S. Because it’s so long, this is going to be the only post tonight, my brain is a bit fried rn lol. Have a great night everyone!)

Warnings: Mentions of very quickly losing a lot of weight, it’s brief but it’s there. As well as, manipulation from Dream. At one point the reader is like “wow it’s been three days since you hit me… Thanks Dream!” And a few swear words here and there. 

Before Wilbur died, you and Wilbur were married. It absolutely broke your heart to watch the love of your life lose his mind (and then his life) for the nation that you and he created to raise and protect your boys in. But you stood by his side until the very end. You held his hand as he died and clutched his body with Phil once it was over. Ghostbur gave you somewhat of a shock. Because you’re husband was back, and he remembered you. He was the man you had married. The person he was before the presidency, before the war, before L’Manberg… You’re Wilbur was back. But you were still sad. You couldn’t hug him or kiss him like you were able to and although he seemed to be right in front of you, it felt like he couldn’t be farther away. Ghostbur can see this and decides that if he can, he really wants to try to come back to life. He tells his father and older brother about this and so they begin planning and researching. In doing this, they kind of accidentally turn a blind eye to what is happening to you and Tommy. 

While those three are figuring out how to bring Wilbur back from the dead, you and Tommy are being harassed by Dream. Something else you lost when you lost Wilbur was protection from Dream. For some reason, Dream was always afraid of Wilbur. Perhaps it was his ability to always stand up for what he wanted and fight for the things he loves… Or perhaps it was because he was Techno’s brother. Doesn’t matter. Point is when you lost Wilbur you lost the protection from Dream. Dream threatens you and Tommy, trying to provoke Tommy and trick him into doing stuff so that Dream could get him in trouble and one day it finally works. Dream tells Tommy where George’s vacation house is because he knows that Tommy cannot resist checking a place out and looking through other people’s stuff. So Tommy drags Ranboo over there and while they’re there they accidentally knock over a lantern and burn some of the house and some of the chests. On the other side of the server, Dream is in your home, poking fun at you for losing your husband and telling you that it was partially your fault and just stuff like that. You didn’t react. You never could when talking to Dream. But his words stung and slashed deep, and he knew it. Finally after a while of this, Tommy comes bursting through your front door, out of breath and seemingly panicked. “What’s the matter?” You ask softly, leaving your kitchen and going to comfort your boy. Tommy is about to spill everything but when he looks up he sees Dream and immediately swallows his words. “We were playing tag… That’s all… Tag” he says. You absolutely do not believe him but you catch his gaze and know that whatever he’s done he cannot say it in front of Dream. So you decide you’ll just have to wait…. You don’t have to wait long. 

“You burnt down George’s vacation home?” Dream’s deadly tone sounds from the kitchen. Your eyes widen and scan Tommy’s face and the look that overtakes him, you know it’s true. “I did not burn it down… I knocked over a lantern and a small fire broke out… I tried to repair everything, it’s fine.” Tommy insists. But Dream seems too pissed to listen to reason. “Come with me” he hisses, marching forward and snatching Tommy’s wrist tightly and marching out of the house. A small whimper left Tommy’s lips as he was pulled causing you to fly into a rage. “Let go of him!” you demand, chasing after them. Dream doesn’t listen and so you reach out and shove his shoulder causing him to stumble, let go of Tommy’s wrist and whip around to face you too. A chilling smile rests on his face, “Oh you just messed up big time.” Before you can react, he reaches out, grabs your wrist, grabs Tommy’s again and continues on down the Prime Path. You’d try to fight it but the grip on your wrist was just too strong. Dream pulls you to Tubbo and immediately jumps on the boy. He explains what happened as well as says that you assaulted him and that he wants you two exiled from L’Manberg or there will be hell to pay. Dream tells Tubbo he will start a war and will kill everyone and everything if his orders are not followed. You can tell Tubbo really doesn’t want to, but it’s something he has to do. Tubbo lets out a small sigh and nod, “Okay Dream. You win.” He murmurs, not looking at Tommy’s betrayed face. “Excellent choice, Mr. President,” the man spits out. “Tubbo” Tommy utters broken heartedly, staring at his best friend, silently begging him to say sike… It never comes. “Dream please escort Tommy and Y/N out of my country.” “With pleasure” You wrist is seized again and you’re being dragged away from your home. 

After you three get out of the SMP, Dream lets go of your wrists and lets you walk for yourself. You approach Tommy and wrap a comforting arm around him. “It’s going to be okay Tommy. Everything is going to be okay.” You comfort the young boy who sighs and nods, “I just can’t believe that he would throw me under the bus like that,” Tommy murmurs. “I know kiddo. I know.” You follow Dream for a very long time until he is satisfied that you are far enough away from the rest of the SMP. “Okay, we stop here… Put your stuff in this hole,” Dream commands, digging a small hole for the two of you to throw your stuff in. You let out a scoff and roll your eyes, “No way. You’ve already forced us into exile. There’s no way we’re giving you our stuff.” Dream’s face flushed a bright red before he lurched forward and grabbed you. Putting in a headlock to where you’re back was pressed against his chest, his arm around your throat while he has a crossbow to your head. “I’ve had enough of you fucking attitude Y/N. You have no power here. I do. I’m in charge and when I say to do something, you do it. If I ask you to jump, the only thing you may ask after that is “How high?” Do you understand?” You don’t speak, not wanting to give him the satisfaction of obedience. But then the tip of the arrow digs into the side of your head causing you to let out a small pained whimper, “I said, do you understand?” he demands again. “Yes” you finally whimper out. He moves the crossbow away from your skull and lets you go and shoves you forward, stumbling into Tommy who catches you and stabilizes you. “Put your stuff in the hole… Now” he growls, not in the mood for any more ‘games’. You and Tommy share a look and then a sigh and slowly put your things in the hole like he demanded. And you could only watch as he placed TNT above it and blew up everything. All of your items that you had worked hard for… Gone in a moment. Dream leaves with a cackle. You and Tommy are just there. Shocked. Finally, after a few moments, you’re able to shake yourself out of it. “Okay… Let’s get started, there’s no time to waste.” Tommy just looks at you and then he sighs and nods. “Let’s do it then.” The two of you spend the rest of the day gathering materials and building yourself a little shelter. You were all alone… At least you were all alone with your brother.

As we all know, Dream comes back almost every day. He comes back, blows up your stuff and leaves. The first time he came back you tried to stop him… It didn’t go well. “Dream, please he just-“ He cut off your words with a harsh slap across the face. It sends you flying and leaves your head spinning. “Haven’t you learned yet? Stuff. Hole. Now.” And you have no choice but to obey. You watch with a broken heart as Tommy slowly begins to actually trust Dream and believe him when he says that no one misses him. You do your best to be there for him and convince him that it’s not true but as days go by and no one, not even your Ghostbur, you can’t help but slowly believe that they’ve forgotten about you two. As time goes on, it seems that you and Tommy fade. You lose a lot of weight. Your food source is scarce and you have to do a lot of work because you’re restarting every. single. day. You get hurt a lot easier and it takes a lot more time to recover. Every once in a while, Dream will physically hurt you. Whether it a slap or a small sword slash, he does it just to make sure you still remember who’s in charge. You just learn to take it and deal with it. It hurts, but at least it’s you and not Tommy. Ranboo visits you once and is horrified at what he sees. He’s worried about you, but knows he can do basically nothing to help you. He makes a mental note to tell someone about it back in the SMP…. And even though he has memory problems, this is one thing he cannot forget. 

On the other side of the SMP, Philza, Techno, and Ghostbur have done it. They’ve cracked it. They have figured out how to bring Ghostbur back to life and to bring back Wilbur. The three make the plan and tell no one, especially not you. (Yeah…. They don’t even realize that you and Tommy aren’t around rn lol) They want to make sure this works before they tell anyone. So they do all the prep and the work and then they perform the ritual. They perform it in a cave somewhere just a little bit away from Techno’s house so that absolutely no one would know where they are or what they were doing. They begin just as nightfalls. Carefully completely each step and making sure they’re doing everything just right, knowing if they fuck up one small thing it’s over and they won’t be able to get Wilbur back. The three complete the final step and wait…. Nothing happens. “Fuck!” Techno curses, his eyes falling to the book, “We did everything right! It should have worked!” “Techno calm down, we’re all upset but at least we-” Philza doesn’t get to finish. All of the sudden a bright light floods the room. The light? It’s coming from Ghostbur. “Uhh guys?” the ghost questions in fear as he is levitated off the ground. Philza and Techno cannot look at him for fear of going blind. Ghostbur is unsure of what is happening but then the shredding pain fills his body. A scream rips from his throat as his whole form begins to physicalize. The skin begins to become real as the bones, blood, organs, and all other internal body parts forms. All memories that Ghostbur had forgotten flood Wilbur’s mind as his whole life flashes before his eyes, reminding him of everything. It only lasts a few moments more before the light fades and Wilbur is dropped from the air. His body hits the ground with an extremely harsh thump. He feels the impact and lets out a groan. His whole body is sore… But he’s there. He’s real and most importantly he’s alive. “Wilbur?” Philza asks hesitantly. Wilbur lets out another groan. The two standing men share a look before rushing to his side. They kneel beside him and gently reach out. Don’t tell anyone but tears threaten to fall from both men’s eyes, Philza and Techno’s, as their hands actually are able to touch Wilbur and they don’t go through him as if he were a ghost. They gently help him from his side to laying on his back. At the movement, Wilbur opens his eyes and is met with the tear laced ones of two of his family members. “Hey guys” he manages to croak out, “how’s it going” “Wilbur” Philza breaks, a tear streaming down his cheek before he lurches forward and wraps the boy into a warm hug. “I’m sorry. I’m so sorry” the older man sobs to his son. “Shhhh,” Wilbur calms his father, “It’s okay Dadza. I wanted it. You did what you had to do. It’s okay.” To the two’s surprise’s Techno’s buff arms wrap around the two and join in the hug. “It’s uhhh… it’s good to see you Wilbur” Techno grumbles, not really liking the emotion that had built up in his chest. Wilbur let out a soft laugh, “Good to see you too Tech.” 

The sweet moment is broken by someone calling Techno’s name a little ways away from the cave. At first, they elect to ignore it, but then the voice calls again, this time for Philza and they can tell now that whoever it is, is panicking. So the two help Wilbur up and gently help him out of the cave. They look out over the snow and find Ranboo there, standing on Techno’s front porch. “Ranboo!” Techno calls out causing the tall boy to turn around and then run at them. “Techno! Phil!.... Is that Wilbur? Like actual real Wilbur? He’s alive?” Ranboo asks, his tone still slightly panicked. “Yes Ranboo… It’s a long story but to sum it up we managed to bring Wilbur back to life… Now why are you here and why are you panicked.” Ranboo’s eyes shift back to Wilbur and gulps, “I knew you weren’t going to like this… But now you’re really not going to like this… Dream is hurting Y/N and Tommy…” All three, especially Wilbur, snap to attention at that. “What?” Wilbur asks harshly. Ranboo gulps and nods before diving into his story. He tells them about your exile and how Dream has been treating you two, blowing up your stuff and even physically harming Y/N. He tells them that Dream has the two convinced that nobody cares about them anymore. The three go stiff at that. Have they all been so focused they really missed all of this? Well time to go right some wrongs. It is almost as if all ache and tiredness left Wilbur’s body at the thought of his spouse being hurt, especially at the hands of Dream. He straightens up and takes a few steps toward Ranboo, “Take them to us” he speaks, his tone pretty damn dark. Ranboo nods and quickly turns around and leads the three men back to the exile spot. 

Back in exile, you and Tommy built a house… Logsted! It wasn’t exactly your taste, but it made Tommy happy so you lived in it together. You had woken up, actually feeling kind of good. The bruises and nicks on your face had slowly begun to heal and Dream hadn’t hit you in the past three days. You had a nice dinner last night, you and Tommy had found some chickens and made a small chicken farm a little ways away from the house so that way Dream couldn’t easily find it, but point is you had chicken for dinner… that’s what I was getting at… I’ll move on. So long story short, you were feeling good. The sun had risen and so Tommy and you were just kind of waiting for Dream to show up so you could get the daily blowing up over with. And like clockwork, he shows up, but for some reason he’s angry. For the past couple days he’d actually be pleasant to be around, greeting you asking you how you’ve been. But today was different. He slammed the door open and begins digging a hole in the middle of Logstedshire… That’s really weird. He was going to blow up the stuff inside the house? No way. But he points to the hole and you know he wants you to dump your items in. You move to the hole but don’t throw your stuff in, “Inside the house? Can we please go outside, I don’t want to ruin our hard work” wrong thing to say. A growl escapes Dream’s lips as he reaches forward and slaps you hard across the face, harder than he’s ever slapped you. It is enough to make you dizzy, but you don’t even have time to recover because his hand is in your hair, yanking it back forcing you to look at him. “You stupid bitch. You would think that after all this time, you would have learned by now… I mean you were doing so so well. But it just seems that you never learn your lesson… Guess I’ll have to teach you yet again.” And he pulls out his sword and points it at your stomach, ready to slice you again. Just as he’s about to harm you, the door swings open again and someone stumbles in. They lean against the doorframe with their hand grabbing the top of the frame. You can hear Tommy let out a gasp and you watch Dream’s eyes widen in fear. “So Dream,” an all too familiar voice calls, “What’s this about hurting Y/N and Tommy now?” And then you’re let go by Dream. You crash to the ground, fall flat on your ass, but you manage to scramble to a stand as you stare at the door frame in complete... Shock? Amazement? Fear? You can’t tell. You’re husband, Wilbur, is standing there in the flesh. Literally in the flesh. He’s alive again and you cannot believe it. “Wilbur” Dream stutters out, “You’re alive? How-” “That doesn’t matter, Dream. What matters is the fact that you’ve been hurting Y/N and Tommy… We can’t have that. So now what is going to happen is I’m going to take my family back to L’Manberg and you are never going to hurt them again,” Wilbur announces, moving ever so slightly further into the room. Seeming to have recovered just a bit from shock, Dream actually retorts, “Or what?”. Two more people enter the house and it causes Dream to blanch even further. “I think you know what… now run along.” Not wanting to risk it, Dream takes off running. 

Once you’re sure he’s gone, you allow yourself to speak. “Wilbur?” You whisper out, still not sure if this is real or if you’re dreaming. Wilbur’s attention shifts to you and he completely soften. “Hello,” he greets with a soft smile on his face, taking a few steps toward you, “Have you missed me?” Deciding you don’t care if he’s real or not, you rush forward and throw yourself into his arms. You, like Philza and Techno, almost cry at the feeling of your body’s connecting. He’s here. He’s real. And he’s alive. His arms wrap around you and hold you to him so tightly, you almost can’t breathe. But you don’t care. You’re hugging your husband. You’re actually hugging your husband. “I missed you so much, Wilby. I mean we had Ghostbur but it wasn’t the same. I missed you,” you mumble into his shoulders, the tears slowly falling out of your eyes. His hand comes up and slowly pets your head, in silent comfort and reassurance. 

After a few minutes you pull away slightly, “How are you-” You’re cut off by his lips pressing against your and you cannot help but melt. It has been months since his passing and this was just the absolute best feeling in the world. You kiss back with so much passion it makes your head spin, this time in a good way. It’s also probably the only time ever his brother’s didn’t fake vomit at the sight of you kissing. You only pull back to catch a breath, but right as you breathe in, Wilbur’s lips are back on yours. The process repeats a few times, before you manage to breathe out a “Will,” causing him to pull back, but leaving his forehead resting on yours and his lips just hovering above yours. “Yes my love,” he mumbles to you. “Can we go home please” you ask, not wanting to be here at Logstedshire any longer. He gives you a warn grin, leaning the inch forward and kissing you once more before giving his answer. “Of course my love. Let’s get out of here.” 

[courageous-she]

Needing You- Charlie Gillespie

Charlie x female reader

Summary: You’re having a rough day and go to your best friend for some comfort

Word Count: 3037

Author’s Note: I haven’t really written in a while but became a SIMP for this boy after watching JATP. Here’s something I thought up while I should have been working at work. Also the formatting may have gotten a little wonky so sorry for that. Um anyway, hope you enjoy!

**

You: Hey, are you home? Charlie: Yeah, why, what’s up? You: Can we hang out? I don’t really want to be alone rn Charlie: Sure thing! I can come over? You: Actually, can I come over? I don’t feel like being in my apartment rn Charlie: Of course, doors unlocked <3

You locked your phone, resting it on your chest and letting out a long sigh. Life had just been hitting too hard lately, so you texted Charlie hoping he’d be able to distract you and take your mind off of things. You simply needed some quality time with your best friend and to not think about everything going on in your life right now. Luckily, Charlie was always down to hang out and was always flexible on what the two of you would do.

You lifted your head just enough from your starfish position on your bed to glance over your outfit. You’d changed into your comfy clothes when you got home a few hours ago. These would be fine, Charlie has seen you in worse clothes, and probably in an overall worse state than this. Shrugging, you stood from your bed and grabbed your keys, making your way over to the bus stop at the end of your street. 

Quietly opening the door to Charlie and Owen’s apartment, you carefully left your shoes at the door. You looked up and noticed Owen and Jeremy sitting on the couch in the small apartment living room. “Hey, Y/N” Owen and Jeremy said at the same time, both giving a quick nod of the head. You waved back, making your way down the hallway to Charlie’s room. It wasn’t odd for you to come over to the boy’s apartment, so Owen and Jeremy didn’t question it. Owen was more used to your frequent visits than Jeremy because Owen actually lived there, but both boys knew how close you and Charlie are so it would be odd if you didn’t show up at some point during the week.

Charlie’s door was open a crack, a low light creeping out into the hallway. You pushed the door open just enough to slide your body through, and closed it when you were all the way inside. 

“Hey” Charlie said softly, sitting up slightly in his bed and closing his laptop. Instead of responding, you pulled the covers back on his bed and slid under. Charlie watched you, slightly confused, but lifted his arm for you when you began to crawl under it resting your head on his chest. His arm around you hugged you closer, while his other hand came around to rest on top of yours that was resting on his stomach. 

“Y/N? Is everything okay?” he asked, voice soft. You shook your head ‘no’ on his chest. “Do you want to talk about it?” Again, you shook your head. Charlie’s chest rose up before he let out a long sigh. It wasn’t often you got like this, but when you did it always broke Charlie a little inside. “What can I do to help?” “Is it okay if we just lay here for a while?” you finally said.

“Yeah, ‘course it is. Want me to put on a movie for background noise or somethin’?” Charlie asked, leaning over slightly to grab his tv remote. You simply nodded a ‘yes’ against his chest, knowing he would just choose a movie for the two of you. 

Charlie ended up choosing “Onward”, a Disney movie was bound to put a smile on your face, he thought. The two of you silently watched the movie, staying in relatively the same position. As the movie was coming to a close, tears began to make their way down your face, landing on Charlie’s shirt. He looked down when he began to feel the wet spot on his chest. Moving so he could see your face better, Charlie smirked at your current state.

“Are you crying?” Charlie asked, the goofy smirk not leaving his face. You lifted your head from his chest, glancing between his smirking expression and the puddle on his chest. 

“What? He never got to meet his dad! After all that!!” you said, pouting out your bottom lip so you didn’t start sobbing. Charlie chuckled before sitting back and pulling you back into him.

“Haven’t you seen this before? You knew this was coming” he replied while turning his attention back to the screen.

“Just because I’ve seen it already doesn’t make it any less sad, Char.” But he could tell by the tone in your voice that you weren’t talking about the movie anymore. He grabbed the remote, stopping the end credits. You started to sit up, wiping the remnants of tears from your face.

“Are you ready to talk about it?” he asked, voice soft and understanding. You hugged your knees to your chest, resting your head on your knees facing your friend sitting next to you.

“Everything is just so overwhelming right now. It’s like nothing can go my way and just keeps piling on top of me. I feel like I’m drowning and I’m so over it.” There was a comfortable silence between the two of you for a moment “I hate feeling like this” you whispered. Charlie put his hand on your back, rubbing small circles.

“Hey, hey, look at me” he said. Your eyes remained fixed on a random spot of his bed. “Y/N, please” he whispered. You shifted your gaze so that your eyes met his. “I know that things might be really tough right now, but I know you, and I know how hard you work, and I know that you will get through this. You have the weekend to forget about things and relax for a bit too, I’m here to get your mind off of the stress.”

You smiled at his reassuring words; he always knew what to say. You moved so that you could rest your head on his shoulder. “Thanks, Char, don’t know what I’d do without you.”

“I don’t know, probably die or something” he said casually. You punched his shoulder jokingly and laughing at the boy next to you. “You hungry? We can order some food” 

“I didn’t bring my wallet with me” you said, remembering that you’d only grabbed your keys on your way out. 

“Don’t worry about that, it was on me anyway.” Charlie said, scrolling through UberEats on his phone for something to order. “What are you feeling?”

“Char, I’m not letting you pay! At least let me Venmo you?” you asked, already beginning to feel guilty at the fact that he offered to pay.

“Y/N” he said, putting his phone down and turning to face you, “You’re not paying,” he placed both hands on your cheeks, squishing them slightly, “Do not. Worry. About it.”

“But Charlie,” you replied, turning your body to face him straight on, “I. Feel. Bad” you mimicked his position, placing both hands on his cheeks and squishing them. And there the two of you were, hands on each other’s cheeks, squishing them. That was until you heard Charlie’s bedroom door slowly creak open.

“Hey guys, Jer and I were just wondering if you wanted to order food?” Owen asked, walking in while looking down at his phone. When he looked up and noticed the way you two were positioned, he stopped dead in his tracks. “Uh, I’m sorry, did I walk in on something?” he asked concerned, but slightly amused. 

“Perfect timing Owen!” Charlie said, taking his hands off your cheeks and grabbing his phone again, “Y/N and I were just having the same conversation”

“I was thinking maybe Chinese?” Owen asked, resuming his scrolling on his phone. You and Charlie looked at each other, an unsure look on your face.

“Eh, not really feelin’ it” Charlie replied, going back to his phone for food inspiration.

“I was kind of craving pasta from that Italian place down the street” you said.

“Pomodoro?” Charlie asked, and immediately he looked at Owen and they gave each other the same look. “Yes!” They both said at the same time.

“I’ll go ask Jer what he wants, text me your orders.” Owen replied, leaving the room. But before Owen asked Jeremy what he wanted to eat, he explained in detail what he saw when he walked in on you and Charlie. The two boys grinned at each other, knowing how the two of you felt about the other, and knowing that neither of you would say anything to the other.

**

When the food arrived, the four of you sat in the small living room eating, joking, and watching a variety of YouTube videos. You loved hanging out with the guys, it was always entertaining and you definitely got a workout from how much you laughed. 

After everyone had finished eating, the four of you decided to put on a movie. You sat next to Charlie on the smaller couch, leaning into his side, while Owen laid out on the bigger couch and Jeremy had a spot on the floor with some pillows. 

You’re not sure how long into the movie you made it, but eventually you fell asleep on Charlie’s shoulder. He hadn’t noticed you fell asleep until Owen brought it up.

“Hey man, she out?” he asked, leaning up on the couch. Jeremy looked over too, noticing your sleeping figure resting against Charlie. Charlie glanced down at you, brushing your hair away from your face.

“Yeah, she must’a fell asleep” he said, eyes resting on you a little longer before turning to look at Owen. Owen smirked and looked at Jeremy, who matched his smirk before the two boys looked back at Charlie. “What’s the look for?” he asked confused.

“Oh, come on, Charlie!” Jeremy said, “You are head over heels for her!” he whisper shouted.

“And you have been since day one” Owen added. 

“I- I don’t know what you’re talking about!” Charlie whisper shouted back. The boys couldn’t see but underneath the blanket, Charlie was pulling you closer to him. He felt like he had to protect you despite there really being nothing to protect you from.

“Don’t avoid it Charlie, it’s so obvious” Owen retorted.

“The only question is, when are you finally going to tell her?” Jeremy asked.

As Charlie was forming his response, his felt you shift next to him. All three boys shifted their gaze to you, hoping you hadn’t heard what they were talking about. You shifted so that your face was resting in the crook of Charlie’s neck. He shivered at the feeling of your breath on his skin.

“Char?” you asked, too sleepy to open your eyes. Charlie squeezed your side to let you know he was there.

“What’s up? You alright?” he asked.

“ ‘m fine. What time is it?”

“Uh, it’s about 12:30” 

“Shit!” you said, quickly sitting up from your comfortable position and rubbing the sleep out of your eyes, “The last bus leaves in 30 minutes, I gotta go!” You started to stand up from the couch, but Charlie grabbed your hips, sitting you back down on the couch.

“Chill, Y/N! I’m not letting you get on a bus in the middle of the night! You can sleep in my bed, I’ll take the couch tonight” Charlie said, trying to calm you down. Jeremy coughed from the other side of the room, giving Charlie a look. Jeremy was crashing on the couch considering that he didn’t actually live there and had planned to spend the night. Charlie shot back a ‘not now’ look, returning his focus on you.

“I can’t take your bed. I’ll take the couch” you said, not wanting to put your friend out any more than you had tonight.

“Well, actually, I-I’m supposed to be sleeping on the couch” Jeremy finally spoke up. Charlie shot him a look, causing Jeremy to shrug and shy back out of the conversation.

“Then I’ll take the floor, but I’m not taking your bed” You said, bundling the blanket that was piled next to you. 

“Y/N, you are not sleeping on the damn floor. Either you sleep in my bed or we’re both sleeping on the floor. End of story” Charlie said, a little more stern this time.

“Well with that logic, why don’t we both just sleep in the bed?” you asked, shrugging. Charlie’s eyes went wide. Owen and Jeremy’s heads quickly turned their attention to you, smirks threatening to appear on their faces. 

“I-I mean, if-if you’re cool with that, yeah we could do that” Charlie stuttered, rubbing the back of his neck. He hadn’t expected you to offer to share a bed with him, but he sure as hell wasn’t going to pass this opportunity up.

“I wouldn’t offer if I wasn’t cool with it, but now that we’ve settled that, I’m tired. Goodnight boys!” you said, standing up and waving.

“ ‘night!” Owen and Jeremy replied, waving as you made your way back to Charlie’s room. What you didn’t see was the two boys silently cheering Charlie on as he slowly stood and made his way to his room. 

You were already tucked away when he made it, closing the door softly behind him. He made his way through the dark and found his way to bed. He slipped in next to you, laying awkwardly on his back, not exactly knowing how to sleep next to you. He turned his head to look at you. Your back was facing him, breathing slow. He figured that you’d already fallen asleep given how tired you were, so he got comfortable and eventually fell asleep.

**

Charlie woke with a start when he heard you start to cry out in your sleep. He couldn’t make out what you were saying but he knew that you were having a nightmare. He immediately pulled your back close to his chest, arms wrapping around you. His cheek was pressed against yours as he whispered in your ear. “Hey, hey, you’re alright, I’m here, you’re okay” You woke up, heart racing, and hands grasping Charlie’s arms that wrapped around your middle. He loosened them enough for you to turn around and face him. 

“What would I do without you?” you asked, cuddling closer into his chest, eyes closing in comfort. Charlie took a deep breath, he felt like now was the time to tell you. Tell you how he really felt, how much he wanted to never be without you.

“Y/N?” he whispered?

“Yeah, Char?”

“Can I tell you something?” He was trying to keep his nerves down, knowing you’d be able to feel him shaking.

“Of course, you can tell me anything.” You replied, shifting to lean slightly over him. He mimicked your position, the two of you leaning to face the other. “I like you. Um, like more than a friend kind of like you. And I don’t want this to ruin what we have so if you don’t feel the same way that’s- that’s cool we can forget I said this.” Charlie rambled. You were taken aback by the sudden out poor of emotional truth. Charlie was beginning to accept that you didn’t feel the same way until you made a move. You leaned in and kissed Charlie, all of the bottled-up feelings coming to the surface. 

“I like you too, Char,” you whispered, hand cupping the side of his face, “God, I’ve liked you since the day we met” you laughed, remembering your first encounter on set with Charlie. Charlie sighed from relief from next to you.

“I was so scared you didn’t feel the same…”

“How could I not, Charlie? I literally couldn’t survive without you.” You spoke. A smile crept its way onto Charlie’s face before he leaned in for another kiss, deeper and more passionate than the first. The two of you spent much of the rest of the night like that, moving between sleep and giggly sleepy kisses. The next morning, the two of you slept in a little later than normal, and laid in bed cuddled up watching TikToks, sneaking kisses in between. It was a kind of bliss you didn’t think you’d ever experience. Both of your heads turned when a short knock was made against the door.

“Are you guys dead in there?” Owen asked through the door. The two of you chuckled from the bed.

“We’re fine Owen!” Charlie shouted.

“Are you sure? It’s like noon-thirty and I haven’t heard anything from either of you?” Owen shouted back. You laughed at the boys, moving to get out of the bed and answer the door. Charlie pouted at the lack of you next to him. You opened the door to see a concerned looking Owen. 

“Good morning, Owen” you smiled.

“Did I interrupt something?” he asked, noticing Charlie’s lack of shirt and a messy bed.

“No, you didn’t. We were just getting up to grab some breakfast” you replied.

“Oh, well I was going to ask if you guys wanted some waffles? Jeremy and I just made some” he said, still looking between you and Charlie, attempting to put the pieces together on what happened when the two of you went to bed last night.

“I’d love some waffles! Let me just grab my sweatshirt and I’ll be right there!” 

Owen nodded, leaving the room. You turned to look for your sweatshirt somewhere on the floor. Feeling two arms wrap around your waist, you giggled, placing your arms over Charlie’s.

“You know you don’t have to go out there.” He said, lips hovering just over your ear.

“No, I don’t have to.” You said, “But we need to eat.”

“There’s something right here I could eat.” Charlie replied. You spun around quickly in his arms, slapping him lightly on the upper arm.

“Charlie!” You couldn’t believe how quickly he responded with that!

“What!? It’s true!” he winked at you.

“Well too bad because that is currently not on the menu. I want waffles!” you said before breaking free of his grasp, grabbing your sweatshirt and skipping out of the room to the kitchen. Charlie was left standing in his room, mouth agape, but laughing at how you handled that. What would he do without you?

[tobiosmilktea]

can i request headcannons for tsukishima, kuroo, iwa, and oikawa on their best friend telling them that they like someone so the boys get all sad (or whatever reaction you see fit) but it turns out that their bff was talking about them the whole time + like a confession. thank you in advance 💞

hidden feelings with tsukishima, kuroo, iwaizumi, and oikawa

a/n: sorry for the wait! this was really fun to write, hope you all like it :)) also scenarios are going to take a little longer to publish, but i’ll make sure to get them out asap !

— t. kei

you honestly said it out of the blue

you didn’t think of it much, it was more like a little hint since surely tsukishima was smart enough to figure it out right?

wrong.

you both were in the middle of a study session break and the entire time you could barely focus when the guy you were entirely whipped for was sitting right in front of you

the workspace was small too as both of your materials could barely fit on the table, his face was barely a foot away from yours the entire time

like hOW THE HELL IS HE NOT FLUSTERED RN

it’s been like this for ages though, ever since you two had met the beginning of your first year at karasuno

you immediately fell in love with his humor with how his quite teasing charm was always your favorite type of banter

and you could tell that he had some sort of soft spot for you ever since you could fire back the same spit fire of jokes and teasing just as he did for you

you just hoped that all that teasing (which was literally dRENCHED in flirtations and suggestive humor) that you hoped that a smartass like tsukishima kei would finally get it

but it’s been months and none of it had worked, so you opted for a different approach

you haven’t exactly seen tsukishima jealous and you genuinely wanted to see his reaction that one of his closest friends had taken a liking for someone else

“can i ask you something?” you would start. it was something nonchalant and open ended so of course tsukishima couldn’t really say no

“hm,” he hums as he sipped on his juice box

you cleared your throat, “so there’s this guy i like...”

then a scoff leaves his lips and interrupts you

you give him a look to which his eyes immediately softened as he shook his head, “sorry, keep going.”

“aNYWAY, i’ve liked this guy for a while now and i’ve been hinting that i like him for a while now, but i’m starting to think that he might be too dense to even see.”

tsukishima’s expression was unreadable as he drank the very last of his juice box’s contents before crushing it in his hand, chucking to the other side of the room and into his trash bin

“i think that guy's an idiot.” he concludes, clearing his throat.

“really?” you said, it was almost enticing.

“yeah, honestly i think you shouldn’t be wasting your time on that guy...”

a small pout melted upon your lips as tsukishima’s golden eyes met yours

“why would you think that?”

“cause i think you should pay attention to me instead.” he said out of the blue

“hUH?”

homie really caught you off guard

like you were genuinely confused to whether or not he misspoke or if this was another one of his playful banter

“yeah right,” you muttered, picking up your pencil and continued to jot down notes in attempt to leave the subject behind

“i’m serious.” he deadpanned

your gaze flickered back up to him as you pursed your lips, biting them as you felt your heart beat pound harder against your ribs. your chest was already constricted from the thought of embarrassing yourself for even bringing it up

“who is this guy anyway?” tsukishima continues and it honestly sounded like a genuine threat.

you roll your eyes and scoff, “i was talking about you idiot!”

a small smirk appeared on his lips as if it was the most knowing and condescending look ever, “good, that’s what i thought.”

“hUH?” x2

once again your eyes were wide and confused

“there’s a reason why yamaguchi always leave us alone together.”

— k. tetsurou

it was 2am with you and kuroo being suPER delirious

as it was the start of the weekend, kuroo thought it was a good idea to hangout at your place after vb practice along with kenma

you two were literally the golden trio at nekoma, so it was a given

kenma had left hours ago around 9pm to go home, but honestly there is a good chance he’s still awake and just wanted to leave with the amount of tension between you and kuroo

not to mention he wanted to play games on his computer

kenma literally couldn't stand that awkward air between you and the vb team captain as your usual hangouts didn’t even feel normal anymore

as if you both were stepping on fragile eggshells after what happened earlier during the school day at lunch

it seems like all your advances in terms of trying to flirt with him was always flying over his head

even kenma, who sometimes didn’t pay attention to the conversation as he was too busy playing on his PSP, knew that you would often try and ask kuroo out

even if they were slightly sly and sometimes sounded like normal friendly hangouts, there were so many opportunities to turn it into sometimes, but kuroo was far too cloudy-minded to even spare that thought

but if kenma was being honest, the awkward tension between you and kuroo primarily started cause of him

he was the one who proposed the plan that you should try and make kuroo jealous. if he did have a negative reaction to you saying you liked someone else, then he liked you back. but if he didn’t, then no harm done!

honestly, it sounded like a plan and you deadass said it in the middle of lunch

you three were out in the courtyard eating your bentos when you suddenly said, “so there’s this guy i really like...”

and it immediately got kuroo’s attention

“who?” he immediately asked.

you feigned a smirk to appear on your lips as you simply shrugged to stay in the act, “just someone.” you swatted the thought away, “anyway, i’m just asking on how i should confess to them—”

“it’s yaku isn’t it?” kuroo suddenly concluded

“what? no—”

“then wHO?”

“someone who’s too stupid to see i have feelings for him!” you suddenly spew out.

kuroo’s eyes peered suspiciously at you, nodding as he turned away. “i see how it is, (y/n). i’d honestly like to meet this guy.”

“trust me, you already know.”

and perhaps that wasn’t the best thing to say as kuroo immediately started badgering you with annoying questions once again

throughout the entire day you had been rejecting to answer which basically leads to right now

you and kuroo alone at 2am in your room, sitting in awkward tension as kuroo literally refuses to leave unless you tell him who you liked

“at least give me their initials, (y/n)” the vb captain begged

“noPE!”

“please?” he continued to asked, “i’ll literally buy you all your favorite snacks, just tell me who!”

you roll your eyes, preparing to say no again, but the thought suddenly hits you

why was he so determined to know who you liked if he in fact, doesn’t have feelings for you?

“why do you care so much about who i like?” you suddenly asked 

“c-cause i’m your best friend and i care about you!”

you peered your eyes at him, “kenma is also my best friend and cares about me, and yet you don’t hear him pestering me about my love life.”

you swore you saw the tiniest bit of pink blush on kuroo’s cheeks that perhaps his ears were tinted as well

he looked absolutely beautiful under the moonlight

a sigh left his lips, “because i want to be the only boy in your life.” (besides kenma, but he didn’t mention it cause it was just you and him)

you couldn’t help but feel a smile melt upon your visage, “then i guess it’s a good thing that you’re the one i like.”

— i. hajime

you and iwaizumi were staying after school as you two were on clean up duty

the hallways were pretty empty besides a few handfuls of students also cleaning classrooms or at club activities

it was just the usual, but you surely weren’t acting normal that even iwaizumi noticed

he’s one of your closest friends ever since middle school and you liked to believe that he considered you two best friends, but he usually minded his own business when it came to you

perhaps that’s what made you act so different around him

you weren’t the same (y/n) that would walk with him to and from school, the one who would eat every lunch with him and oikawa, the one who he wouldn’t have to worry about so much since oikawa was primarily his source of stress

but recently, that seemed to have transferred onto you ever since iwaizumi had been too preoccupied with oikawa and volleyball, that you making your feelings for him extremely obvious wasn’t enough

you two have been cleaning for about thirty minutes in (almost complete) silence

really, the only sound coming from the room was the clattering and squeaking of moving chairs and desks around to mop

iwaizumi wasn’t usually the one to get so fed up, especially with you

but this time was different

“so are you going to tell me what’s wrong or are you going to be childish and act like oikawa by giving me the silent treatment?” he starts and you immediately felt your body freeze, but immediately caught yourself and continued to clean

you hear him sigh defeated to which caused your body to turn towards him, “did i do something wrong?”

there was obvious hurt lacing his voice, that he perhaps jeopardized one of his closest friendships over something he didn’t know anything about

you were aware of this and immediately approached him, “you didn’t do anything wrong...” you hesitate as you didn’t know how to follow it up with, “i’m just being moody that’s all”

honestly, not your best excuse but it was workable

“then tell me what’s wrong, (y/n). i’m your best friend that’s what i’m supposed to do.”

and there it was. that look and attitude that made you fall in love with him in the first place

as if a huge wave just crashed upon you, your heartbeat intensified the moment you noticed how close you were to him

you gulped down your rising nerves, almost panicking as the words miraculously left your mouth. “i don’t think the guy i like likes me back.”

it was safe to say, that that definitely wasn’t what iwaizumi was expecting

if anything he was surprised and almost obligated as your best friend to comfort you in that moment, but he couldn’t help but feel almost betrayed

he knew he had no right to as he was nothing more than just a friend to you. so he swallowed his pride and nods with a faux smile on his lips

“it’s okay, (y/n). there’s so many other guys out there.”

then it came down like a sudden downpour, “but i only want you.”

“w-what?” it left his lips almost like a whisper as his eyes widened into saucers

“i’m talking about you, idiot.” you gently hit his hard chest, “but you obviously don’t like me back as you blatantly overlook what i say whenever i flirt with you."

“(y/n), i—”

you continued muttering in a hurried and embarrassed spiel that you didn’t even notice him trying to talk, “it’s okay, i’m ready for rejection, i just don’t want this to ruin our friendship—”

“it won’t because i literally like you too (y/n).” he finally cut in to say, taking you aback

“oh.” you say, still in shock, “cool.”

— o. tooru

you were in quite the predicament

rather than giving oikawa the silent treatment, he was giving it to you instead

basically, what happened was that perhaps you got a bit fed up with how popular oikawa was with girls and how they would often times flock him in packs sporadically throughout the day

and as if the world was out to get you, the packs of girls would always seem to come over whenever it was just you and oikawa alone

surely, from the three years you and oikawa had been friends, you’d assume that you’d get used to it

but you haven’t.

in the first two years of hs, you were pretty lenient and understanding and you truly didn’t mind it but now in your last and final year, you were tired of it

surely it didn’t help when that annoyance was fueled by your pent up feelings for oikawa in the past three years

the only reason why you hesitated to even say anything about your feelings was that you never really had the chance. with so many pretty people in and outside of aoba johsai, oikawa can be guaranteed a significant other within a snap

you felt easily replaceable, not to mention you definitely weren’t his first priority

he was too busy trying to get to nationals and to beat shiratorizawa that a relationship was the last thing on his mind

so here you two were, cleaning up the equipment in the gym in complete silence as volleyball practice had just finished as you were one of the managers

it had been like this for the past three days, being forced to physically interact, yet still not speaking to each other

like right now, you and oikawa were folding up the net neatly to eventually it got shorter and shorter that you and him had met closely in the middle

oikawa seemed to have paused the moment your hand made contact with his to make the final fold and that was when he completely broke

“ugh, i can’t take it anymore!” he exclaimed, shocking you slightly as you took the folded net from him. “i don’t get it (y/n), why can’t you just tell me who you like? i promise i’ll keep it secret!”

“be quiet,” you mutter as you turn your back towards him, “if you keep acting like this, i won’t tell you.”

he groaned once more, his feet dragging on the ground as he stumbled towards you. you froze under his touch the moment his rested his head on your shoulder.

“i just want to know cause i don’t want you to look at other guys.”

god, he was so fucking adorable

you hated to say it, but you gave into him and his charisma and how his easy words could have you complying

“fine,” you sigh, turning to face him. your breath hitched in your throat when you realize how close he was, “he’s on the volleyball team, he’s a third year—”

oikawa cut you off, “it’s iwaizumi isn’t it? i knew it! honestly, no offense to iwa, but i think i would make a better boyfriend, don’t you think?”

you couldn’t help but chuckle with a smile on your face, “you think so?”

“i know so.”

“well, fortunately for you, you’re the guy i really like.” you confessed, watching his expression brighten.

“so you made me go through three days of silent treatment just to finally date you?”

you shrug, asking, “was it worth it?” before being engulfed completely into a hug

“yes.”

a/n: this hasn’t been proofread if you couldn’t tell 👀

[kwonhoshi0]

𝐭𝐨𝐝𝐨𝐫𝐨𝐤𝐢 𝐛𝐞𝐬𝐭𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐬 | h.c

navigation | requests : open | 26th feb 2021 | part 1

pairing : todoroki x fem!reader

genre : very fluffy, teensy bit of angst

themes : mutual pining, violence, tiny bit clichè,

request : heyy can you do a todoroki and bakugo, bestfriends to lovers troupe ? fem reader please >:)) feel free to decline or anything !!

quirk : telekinesis, you get lightheaded when you use too much and your nose bleeds

note : you are all mights neice, you live with him. you don’t have parents and in this storyline you move into the dorms after the USJ attack

[ todoroki ]

> honestly he didn’t understand the difference between bestfriends and what he was feeling

> he thought what he was feeling for you was normal since he’s never had a bestfriend before pain

> he met you around 2 years before you got into UA

-> meeting you

> you were waiting outside of a meeting room your uncle was in and you weren’t the only one

> you weren’t allowed to actually go into the meeting room so you sat outside opposite the dual haired boy

> his hair reminded you of a candycane

> you were curious as to why you hadn’t see him there before especially if his parent is a pro

> you tried not to look at him too much but it was near impossible when he looks the way he does

> you opted to just play with your rings instead you didn’t want to freak him out

> after a couple minutes he noticed your gaze shifted from your rings to the setting sky and since you were too immersed in the red and pink clouds you didn’t notice him staring at you

> honestly i think he loved you from then, watching your eyes light up at the sky was so endearing he didn’t want to look away

> imagine someone being that in love with you i’m so sad rn i’m sorry

> a couple minutes later your uncle walked out of the room along with a couple other heroes including the flame hero endeavor

> ‘shoto i’ll be bringing you along to these meetings often!’

> his voice was loud while the boy looked sick of him, he gritted his teeth a little agreeing

> so that’s why you hadn’t seen him here before

> ‘young y/n! ah this is shoto todoroki you’ll be seeing a lot more of him, endeavor and i have agreed on training you together’

> you have wanted to become a pro-hero like your uncle and since they’re busy it’d be easier having one of them take turns each week

> the heroes explained to shoto that no one can know your last name or your connection to all might since it makes it dangerous for you

> during training you noticed how similar you are, you were both quite reserved and quiet at first

> the first time you talked to him was during your 4th or 5th training session and it was because all might told you to try be more open to friends

> ‘um, hi’

> ‘hello’

> and that’s how you got here

> your friendship was one people only wished to have

> whenever todoroki came around you were both a whole new level of chaotic

> your go to was to either watch terrible films together and make fun of them or bake together

> you were watching the kissing booth and you had to pause it every couple minutes to stop yourself from cringing so much

> he laughed watching your disgusted expression

> he loved seeing your nose scrunch up at the terrible scenes

> you’re not the only one who cringed ‘y/n please pause it again, that was disgusting i need a moment’

> when baking it was usually biscuits and it always resulted in you getting flour everywhere

> ‘wait wait shoto we need to add more sugar’

> ‘uhh but we used all the sugar’

> ‘fuck’ chaos

> whenever shoto had a bad day with his father he knew your house was always open to him

> the first time he got upset he came to you, you opened the door and immediately let him in

> ‘i can’t, i can’t live in that house with him’ you let him cry in your arms when he needed to

> to cheer him up you ate soba together and devised very well thought out plans on how to annoy the fuck out of endeavor

> you went over to todoroki’s as well usually when endeavor wasn’t home so he wouldn’t make you train

> fuyumi and natsuo were the first to notice your closeness and they never made fun of you for it but often said ‘they’re going to fall in love’

> there have been moments you’ll cherish

> when watching a movie marathon there have been many times when all might has come home to your head on todoroki’s shoulder while his head is on yours, you’re both fast asleep

> he draped a blanket over the both of you before telling endeavor he’ll drop shoto off later and that you’re busy training together

> when you first joined UA he finally made a few more friends as did you, at first you were worried that you’d grow apart but thankfully yoi didn’t

> during lunch you always met up after eating, you had gotten a lot closer with the bakusquad but still found time to be together

> walking towards the lunch hall he noticed you walking with midoriya, he was about to speed up to catch up with you guys but you went into a room together and he got very confused

> he went to his usual table ( dekutable )

> when you guys came back he innocently said ‘where were you guys’

> midoriya fumbled over his words while you replied ‘had to ask all might about some homework’ since only todoroki knows about your connection to the pro-hero you had to keep it discreet

> but now midoriya knows as well since he’s the next successor, since todoroki didn’t know that he got suspicous when he saw you heading out the training rooms together, what he didn’t see was all might walking out soon after

> he didn’t understand why this affected him so much, you’re his friend and midoriya is his friend so why does he feel rage when he sees you with him

> at one point he had enough and walked into the room you and midoriya had been going to every lunch ‘are you going to tell me what you’re hiding?’

> inside was you a very scared midoriya and a skeleton form all might

> yeah you had to explain everything but all might wasn’t mad since it’s shoto he knows he can trust him, you’ve trusted him with your name and secrets and he hasn’t said a word

> let’s just say shoto slept very well that night knowing you weren’t secretly dating midoriya

> speaking of that night you walked back to the dorms together, the sunset looked the same as the day you met him

> you got back to your room and sat on your bed after kicking your shoes off

> he watched you as you picked a movie, smiling a little at your pout

> ‘why’re you smiling at me like that icyhot’

> ‘hm just, feel happy’ you looked at him and layed your head in his lap as the light through the window hit your face

> he brought a hand to your forehead and ran his fingers through your hair slightly scratching at your scalp

> you hummed bringing your arms around his waist as he smiled down at you touchstarved, same

> you let the movie play and his eyes were stuck on the screen, you looked up at him and just admired him

> you knew your feeling for him haven’t changed since you met him but that doesn’t matter as long as this doesn’t change

> ‘y/n?’

> ‘hm’

> ‘what happened to that nickname you used to call me, candy cane?’

> ‘do you want me to call you it again’ you could see blush on his cheeks

> ‘yeah, i liked it..it made me feel closer to you’

> you felt your heart swell at his words and you buried your face into his stomach as you felt it heat up

> he giggled at the feeling and pryed your face away from his ticklish stomach, he was now cupping your face

> his grey and blue eyes were stuck in your own [c] eyes

> it was as if you understood what you both wanted, he leaned down a little and when you lifted your head up he knew you wanted this too

> he brought your face towards his own and closed the gap between you both, his lips were gentle against your own

> you both smiled into the kiss

> ‘things won’t change right?’

> ‘never, we’ll only get closer’

> you nudged your nose against his and pecked him again before laying back into his lap

> you talked about how dumb you’ve both been and how long you’ve liked each other before

> an hour later you felt deep breathes coming from him, looking up he had fallen back onto the bed and was asleep with a small smile on his face

A/N :

i will literally never find real love bexause tHIS is so hard to come by and that :) is :) pain :)

taglist : @todoroki-shoto-is-life @blazedbakugou @luluwiie @blue-gold-demigod-clouds @gazelle-des-pres

[rkived]

━ CHASING PAVEMENTS 03 | JJK

↳ PAIRING: dad!jk/married!jk/bff!jk x reader 

↳ GENRE/TAGS: f2l, angst, unrequited feelings, cheating, future smut

↳ WARNINGS: (for this chapter) time jumps, mention of divorce, blood mention ((but like nothing serious)), forced kisses, just sad stuff like this is sad guys lol

↳ WORD COUNT: 8.6k

↳ EXCERPT: ‘‘Jungkook doesn’t want to think this is the end, maybe it’s that stupid voice inside his head that always holds on to things that he knows he should let go of. But he can’t just let go of this and move on. He doesn’t remember what life was like before you and he sure as hell does not want to know what it’ll be like without you.’’

↳ A/N: getting this chapter out has been ((a pain in the ass)) tough !! & cp was supposed to end with this chapter but that was not realistic at all lmao but i do hope u like this n i’ll try to get pt4 quickly as possible <3 thx

01 | 02 | 03 | 04 

‘‘Okay everyone, let’s switch to the upward facing dog!’’

You really don’t want to be here. There’s a lot of stuff running through your head right now that are more important than focusing on yoga positions. You wish you were thinking about grocery shopping or paying that month’s bills. 

Instead, you’re still stuck on the downward facing dog as your mind tells you you’re an idiot, a homewrecker and most importantly, a terrible friend. 

‘‘Y/N, upward facing dog!’’ The instructor, Namjoon, reminds you with a gentle smile as he notices you haven’t switched positions like the rest of the class. You nod and smoothly place your body as he had taught in the classes before.

The only reason why you came to your Saturday morning yoga class was because even with all that happened last night, you wanted to feel a sense of normality. Like you’re capable of going on about your life like nothing had happened.

That’s selfish and stupid because as much as you tried, every single moment since you woke up revolved around last night.

From the moment you opened your eyes, noticing Sunhi wasn’t sleeping next to you, snuggled into your chest like you had last remembered her to be before she fell asleep and you following soon after. 

And as your heart beat faster at the thought of finding her in her dad’s arms instead, watching Saturday morning cartoons on the T.V in your living room; you instead found the place neat and tidy. The messy pillows on your couch where placed like they hadn’t even been moved to begin with, like no one besides you had been in the apartment the night before. 

Somehow he managed to do all of this without you even noticing. You wondered at what time he woke up, cleaned up, took Sunhi without making any fuss and left, all before your 7 AM alarm could wake you up.

He even made you breakfast too. Some eggs, bacon and toast. 

‘‘Y/N, your legs are touching the mat.’’ Namjoon notes as he stands in front of you, ‘‘Let’s focus, okay?’’

You nod once again, though this time a little more embarrassed. If only you could explain to your instructor why you’re so distracted. 

No messages either. No text explaining why he had to leave so early. No sticky note placed on your fridge door about how he made you breakfast. No slight shake to your sleeping body to let you know that he’d be taking Sunhi. Nothing. 

Would’ve you liked that, though? 

You could say yes because he’s your friend and it’s only fair since you took care of his daughter the night before. 

But it’s not right, because friends don’t kiss each other, let alone the way you had let him kiss you and touch you while his daughter slept in your room and his wife waited for both of them at home.

There was a war going on inside you between your brain and your heart. 

Your heart, being a weak ass bitch, was telling you about how exciting everything was. How nice it felt to have Jungkook tell you that he wanted to be with you, that he no longer felt happy with his wife, how perfectly his lips encaptured your own and how you could still feel them on you. 

But your brain, obviously being the logical one between the two, reminded you about how wrong it was. You had never wanted to be placed in a position of being ‘‘the other woman’’. That even though you might not like Jiwoo and had spent years hoping your friend would someday wake up and realize this too, this didn’t feel right. 

‘‘Alright, let’s drink some water now.’’ Namjoon announces, clasping his hands together and showing off that dimple that most ─if not all─ of the students went heart eyes over. 

You take the time to check your phone instead, you don’t need the water because you didn’t do shit anyway. There’s no text from Minji, who you’re scared will somehow, by the grace of everything that’s holy, find out about what you did. No text from Jungkook either and you’re wondering why he hasn’t bothered to send one. 

Instead, there’s a text from Taehyung and you mutter a curse. 

[8:34 AM] Taehyung: hey y/n! i’m sure you’re in your yoga class rn but i wanted to see if maybe you’d be up for lunch at my place? i’ll try and cook something nice :) 

Ah, of course that throughout all of this you forgot about Taehyung. 

The sweet guy who had stuck around only for you to pay him back by kissing your best friend, the one Taehyung had to pretend wasn’t bothered by his interruption that night a few weeks ago. 

God, you do have a way to fuck things up for yourself. 

You don’t know how long you stood there thinking what to reply to him, but it definitely was for a few minutes because you only came back to reality once you heard your name being called once by the instructor.

‘‘Y/N,’’ Namjoon repeats and you look over at him with a puzzled look, ‘‘we’re starting again, if you’d like to join us.’’ There’s that smile again. Bless his patience, you wonder if he’s actually this calm because of yoga or he’s just really good at pretending. 

You look back down at your phone, the screen displaying a text that’s still waiting to be replied to. 

‘‘I uhm─I gotta go, sorry.’’ You quickly reply, making Namjoon look at you with wide eyes, but he makes no effort to stop you either. 

And as quickly as you can, you collect your belongings before you’re heading out the door without saying goodbye. 

Either you quit yoga altogether or just apologize to Namjoon like a grownup next Saturday. Whatever it is, you’re not thinking about what decision to make about your little extracurricular right now. 

There’s only so much you can handle at a time.

Jungkook is lucky that Jiwoo works Saturday mornings because with her away, he’s able to enter his house without having to sneak in. 

He opens the door wide, making way for him and a slightly awake Sunhi in his arms. He drops the keys on the counter without caring about the noise it makes. He doesn’t even have to pretend like he’s walking on glass, his boots are allowed to hit the wooden floor without a care in the world. 

The place doesn’t look much different from what he had left it like the day before. There’s only a dirty glass on the sink, a product of Jiwoo’s daily breakfast smoothies and since she’s always in a rush she never has time to clean it up. 

‘‘Are you still sleepy, pumpkin?’’ he quietly asks his daughter and she nods, he doesn’t blame her since he’s the one who woke her up at 6 AM. ‘‘Alright, I’ll take you to your bed,” he says, a kiss on her head following shortly after. 

He wonders if Jiwoo enjoyed herself last night. No daughter and no husband, sounds like an ideal night for her. It’s not like she was worried about their whereabouts either, considering she hadn’t even bothered to text him wondering why they hadn’t come home. 

If Jungkook’s supposed to feel guilty, he isn’t. 

He’s heard stories before about how there’s a voice in your head constantly reminding you about what you did and how wrong it is. That he’ll be unable to sleep knowing he cheated on his wife while she lies next to him. That he won’t be able to look at her again without feeling remorse all over him.

And when Jiwoo returns home at noon, there’s none of that at all. He offers her a nod of acknowledgement once she enters the living room to find him sitting with his laptop, watching through old videos that he took years back. 

She puts her index finger up, telling him to give her a minute. She’s on a phone call with a friend of hers that Jungkook can only conclude is Hyeri, who he probably met at some point but can’t remember what her face looked like. 

‘‘I know! Like, why do you have to be such a bitch about it? We get that you’re sucking the boss’s dick in private, so you might as well─’’

Jiwoo’s voice is too distracting and so, Jungkook places his earphones in to hear what this video’s audio is about. Once he does, he hits play and the audio is loud enough to drown out Jiwoo’s whining. 

‘‘Guess who came to see you, Pumpkin?’’ 

Jungkook gasps as he remembers this was part of a series of videos he was supposed to show Sunhi once she was old enough to understand them. He recorded a few until he was drowning in work to even grab his camera again. It saddens him that he wasn’t able to continue.

He decides he’ll show them to her later because right now Sunhi is too busy playing with her dolls inside her room to even pay attention to him.

‘‘It’s auntie Y/N! And she came bearing gifts,’’ Jungkook smiles, switching the focus on you ‘‘is that a Fisher Price Taco Tuesday toy set that I see?’’ he wonders in a fake curious tone as you look at him with narrowed eyes ‘‘I wonder how she knew you wanted that, Sunhi. It’s not like your dad had it on his Amazon wishlist or anything.’’

‘‘Very funny.’’ You mumble, handing him the toys so you could go ahead and grab a tiny three-month-old Sunhi from the bed ‘‘Aren’t you the cutest little bean in this entire world? Aren’t you?’’ you coo at the little girl, who looks at you with wide eyes and you’re forced to blink a couple of times because she looks just like him. 

‘‘Of course she is, she’s my spitting image!’’ Jungkook confirms your thought as he grabs Sunhi’s cheek gently with his fingers and squeezes, making the baby giggle.

You side-eye him and then focus your attention back on the baby in your hands, ‘‘No, you’re not, Sunhi. Your daddy is not cute at all.’’ 

‘‘You’re gonna make me put this camera down and have a discussion about this.’’ 

Jungkook chuckles at the footage, noticing how he made you smile because of his comment. The video isn’t long, it’s mostly you cooing to a then tiny Sunhi, giggling at the way you would nuzzle your nose into her belly as Jungkook laughed behind the camera. 

‘‘Jungkook, look at her!’’ You practically squeal as Sunhi grabs your thumb with her little hand ‘‘Oh my gosh, I think I’m gonna cry.’’ 

He laughs as he does a close-up of his daughter holding on to your finger, until he hears the little sniffle you let out and the camera is now focused on you silently wiping a tear away. 

‘‘Wait, you’re actually crying?’’ Jungkook asks in disbelief and you turn to look at him to find the lens focused on you ‘‘Sunhi, you’re Auntie Y/N loves you so much that she’s crying! How cute.’’ 

‘‘You’re so dumb, seriously.’’ you mumble with a frown, going back to gawking at the baby still holding on to your thumb. 

Jungkook sighs, ‘‘I’m gonna have to bleep that out, y’know?’’

You laugh and shrug your shoulders, caressing Sunhi’s stomach. Jungkook whispers ‘cute’, so soft that you’re unable to hear it.

Once it ends, Jungkook is able to see his smiling face as it reflects on the black screen and it’s only then he realized he’d been grinning the whole time. Now his ears are filled with Jiwoo talking over the phone and his smile goes back to a straight line. 

Jungkook closes the video and clicks on the next one, hoping that it’s one that involves you as well. He’s unable to press play because Jiwoo is suddenly standing in front of him, arms crossed and she’s no longer talking on her phone. 

‘‘Yes?’’ He asks, removing an earbud to show her she has his full attention.

‘‘So, where were you last night?’’ 

Jungkook’s slightly surprised that she cares. He tends to forget there’s still some humanity left in her after all, ‘‘At Y/N’s.’’ he answers with a shrug, eyes going back to stare at the screen of his laptop. 

Jiwoo scoffs and he’s forced to look at her again, eyebrow slightly raised. He hopes she doesn’t start because it’s too early and it’s a Saturday. But Jiwoo doesn’t like taking breaks like he does.

‘‘I thought you said that she wasn’t going to be able to take care of Sunhi on Fridays.’’ There’s bitterness in her tone, ‘‘so, what were you doing there?’’ 

Jungkook understands where Jiwoo’s curiosity comes from, but it’s strange. She’s never been the type to ask where he’s been, what he’s doing with Sunhi while she’s not around ─which is practically all the time─ and doesn’t care for your business either. 

‘‘I just stopped by.’’ Jungkook mutters, stroking the nape of his neck in an attempt to not seem suspicious, ‘‘We hung out and Sunhi fell asleep, she didn’t wanna come back home.’’ 

And that’s true, Jiwoo narrows her eyes at him as if she’s debating whether or not to believe him and the excuse of their sleeping daughter. She doesn’t know Sunhi that well to conclude if it’s possible or not. 

‘‘And what, did you all three sleep together in the same bed? Playing family, maybe?’’ 

Jungkook looks at her in disbelief. This is a first. 

‘‘What?’’ Is all he’s able to muster because he’s genuinely shocked at her accusation. 

Jiwoo rolls her eyes, ‘‘Oh, please. Like I’m going to buy that hanging out bullshit.’’ Jungkook looks like a deer stuck in headlights and she chuckles, ‘‘Is what I give to you not enough?’’ 

‘‘I─what are you on about?’’ 

He figures this is her picking a fight because he wasn’t around yesterday to attend her needs like he usually does every Friday night. But Jungkook’s mind is quick to remind him of what he did and it’d be really ironic if he denies Jiwoo’s accusations, that for the first time are actually true. 

‘‘I carried around that girl for nine months, ruined my body because of her, all for you to pick someone else over me?’’ Jiwoo’s voice is raised a little higher and Jungkook can’t help but look over at Sunhi’s bedroom door and hope his daughter is not listening to anything coming from the living room. ‘‘I knew I should’ve never trusted her, I always knew your friendship with her was fucking weird.’’

Jungkook doesn’t want to raise his voice either. It’s not going to get them anywhere. But he can’t stand the way she’s speaking about his daughter and you, she’s never crossed those boundaries before. 

‘‘Are you insane? How can you talk about your daughter like she’s nothing?’’ Jungkook spats out, ‘‘I’ve always been thankful for what you did, I know the shit you went through to bring her into this world.’’ 

But Jiwoo doesn’t care about how loud she’s being, ‘‘You’re so thankful you pay me back by fucking your best friend? While I’m alone over here waiting for you to come back?’’

Jungkook has to take a deep breath and close his eyes for a second, before he loses it. 

He clears his throat, ‘‘Jiwoo, I have always chosen you. Always. I did back when I was a sophomore, I did it when I asked you to marry me, and I did it when I chose you to be the mother of my children. So, I don’t know what─’’

‘‘I don’t give a flying fuck if you chose me! I was supposed to be all of that either way, Jungkook.’’ She interjects.

Was she, though? Of course, she was his girlfriend then. It would make sense that she’d be the one to end up marrying him, having his kids and living the happy life everyone guaranteed he’d live alongside her. 

But he hasn’t been thinking about the choices he ended up taking back then. Instead, he’s been wondering about the ‘what if’s and Jiwoo isn’t in any of them. 

Jungkook’s been daydreaming for months now about how different his life would’ve turned out if he had never asked the pretty girl in his class all those years back and instead had focused his attention somewhere else. Or someone else.. 

‘‘Are you going to answer me?’’ Jiwoo’s stern voice brings him back to the reality he hates, ‘‘Were you going to pick me or was I a second choice?’’ She slowly asks, giving him an opportunity to digest every single word she spoke. 

‘‘You weren’t a second choice,’’ he mumbles and his gaze has faltered and instead focused back on the screen of his laptop. Clicking on a video randomly, trying to distract himself from the situation at hand. Hoping that whatever he says is enough for Jiwoo to leave him alone. 

It doesn’t help that the video automatically plays and it’s you on the first frame, a big smile as you hold Sunhi towards the camera, making her wiggle in your arms. 

What if. 

‘‘Show me that you love me, then.’’

The video still plays as Jungkook looks back at Jiwoo standing right in front of him, her arms are still crossed, but the look on her face is different. Her brows are no longer furrowed and Jungkook might be wrong, but he thinks her eyes look glossy. 

He doesn’t act quickly enough and she takes the laptop from him, closing it before she can even notice what is it that has garnered his attention. Jiwoo straddles his lap and he jumps slightly at the action, placing her arms around his neck as she looks at him with innocent eyes. 

If he didn’t know her, he would’ve believed them. 

‘‘Jiwoo, let’s not─’’ 

‘‘I missed you yesterday,’’ she interjects in a whisper ‘‘show me that you love me right now.’’ 

Her lips latch onto his neck, biting and sucking on the skin as he tries to wriggle himself out of her hold, but her hands push at his chest so he can stay still. 

‘‘C’mon,’’ she mumbles ‘‘show me.’’ She’s pleading by then.

He feels nothing. There’s no electricity in Jiwoo’s kisses. No tingles on his back, no goosebumps on his skin, no fireworks going off. If anything, everytime her lips meet his skin it feels bitter, like they don’t belong there at all. 

‘‘Daddy, come please!’’ The muffled voice of Sunhi inside her room interrupts the one-sided moment and Jungkook is silently thanking her. 

Jiwoo doesn’t make an effort to move as she keeps kissing on all the exposed skin he has to offer. Jungkook sighs in frustration as he forces her off him, making her land beside him with an astonished expression.

Her hands tighten into fists as she looks at him like he’s gone insane, ‘‘What the fuck is wrong with you?’’ She asks in disbelief.

Jungkook blinks, ‘‘Did you─?’’ He gestures with his finger over to his daughter’s room, ‘‘Sunhi is calling me.’’ 

His wife scoffs, crossing her arms over her chest again, ‘‘Of course, you always go running when it comes to her.’’ 

Contrary to his belief, there is no humanity left in Jiwoo at all. She’s just really good at pretending like she cares so she can get her way. This is the last time Jungkook falls for this trick.

Jungkook opens his mouth, but nothing comes out. He repeats this action a few times, to stammer something out. Anything. But there’s nothing besides the expecting silence of his wife as she chuckles incredulously. Jungkook ignores this and turns around, a second away from opening Sunhi’s bedroom door─

‘‘You’re a waste of a husband.’’ Jiwoo sneered. 

His hand drops from the door handle and he sighs, taking a deep breath in and out.

He looks back at her, ‘‘You know what, Jiwoo? I wasn’t lying when I said you weren’t my second choice.’’ he informs and her eyebrow raises up ‘‘But you aren’t my first choice now either.’’

Jiwoo scowls and heaves in anger, ready to let hell loose on him ‘‘I knew that who─’’

‘‘It’s Sunhi,’’ he states and Jiwoo closes her mouth before she can even finish her sentence. ‘‘Ever since I knew you were pregnant with her, she’s been at the top of my list and she’ll always be there. I don’t care what you do or say to me, I really don’t. You don’t love me, Jiwoo.’’

At the accusation, her eyes soften and she’s standing up to argue that it’s not true, but Jungkook raises his hand in a motion to stop her. 

‘‘You don’t love me and I don’t love you.’’ 

Jungkook expected her to start yelling at him like she usually did, but Jiwoo’s rendered speechless on her spot as she stares at him, blinking rapidly. 

‘‘I don’t love you,’’ he repeats ‘‘and I haven’t loved you for a while now. I don’t remember the last time my heart raced up when I saw you or when I stopped enjoying kissing you. And I’m sorry, because I should’ve told you instead of pretending like I did.’’ 

Jiwoo’s motionless as she takes all of his words in. 

‘‘But I did it for her because I didn’t want her to hate me if you ever left. But that was a dumb idea because you don’t care about Sunhi. And frankly, I doubt she cares about you either. She never speaks about you, never asks about you, she’s used to you not being here even if you sort of are.’’ 

Jungkook places his hand over the doorknob once again and Jiwoo grimaces.

‘‘I should’ve never begged you to come back. I should’ve thought about what you wanted and it’s always been clear to me what that is,’’ Jungkook swallows the knot he feels in his throat ‘‘and it’s never been Sunhi or me.’’

‘‘Jungkook.’’

He thinks she’s about to tell him how sorry she is. That she’ll recognize how heartless she’s been and how she not only failed him, but failed their daughter too. Maybe beg for a final try at their relationship as she promises she’ll change this time. 

Jungkook hums and spares her one last glance.

Jiwoo has a stoic expression on her face and she speaks under her breath, but clear enough for him to hear, ‘‘Sign the papers when you get them.’’

You expect Minji to just jump at you any minute now because if looks could kill, you’d be dead already. Maybe you should’ve pretended like you weren’t home and let Minji knock on your door until she’d give up, but even you knew better than that. 

It was better to face her now than to deal with her accumulated wrath later.

‘‘When were you going to tell me?’’ She suddenly asks and it takes you by surprise because it had been way too silent since you had let her in.

Minji works like a predator, she attacks when you least expect it and right now you definitely feel like you’re about to be eaten. 

‘‘I─uh…’’ 

She sighs and you can see the disappointment in her face, ‘‘Were you going to tell me at all?’’ 

You nod instead, not trusting yourself enough to speak at the moment. 

It had been a week since the event in your living room and it makes you shift uncomfortably in your chair as you stare at your friend, who’s sitting on the couch where everything went down. 

‘‘Then why did I have to find out through Taehyung?’’ She asks in a disappointed tone. 

You figured he’d tell her. It’s not like you asked him not to do so, but you had silently prayed that the universe was on your side on this one and by some unknown reason they wouldn’t bump into each other at work and Minji, like she usually did, wouldn’t ask him about you. Because if she did, then he’d have to explain how you had broken the news that you had made out with your best friend; the one Minji despised with her soul. 

A sigh escapes your lips as you lower your head with shame.

You were supposed to tell her, but every time you took your phone and tried to dial or text her, your nerves got the best of you and ended up chickening out, promising that you’d do it the next day. Then the next day. And the next day. 

It’s not like you’re scared of Minji─well, maybe only slightly. But you know the effort she put into getting you to go out and meet someone new, someone that’s not married and not a father. She’s known Taehyung for so long, probably even told him how much of a good girl you were to convince him to take you out, only for you to end up throwing all of that in the trash like it was nothing. 

Minji’s also spent years pushing you to move on from your friendship with Jungkook. Not just because she doesn’t like him, but because she’s always felt like he’s held you back while he’s made his way in life. You’ve stuck behind him making sure that he’s okay and happy, forgetting about yourself in the process. 

‘‘I’m not angry at you,’’ she speaks softly, making you look up at her with surprise. ‘‘I just─He gave you a second chance, Y/N. Why did you say no?’’ Her words are laced with curiosity and you know that she’s asking because even Taehyung wasn’t able to give her an answer to this question. 

Your bottom lip trembles and you’re trying your hardest not to burst into tears in front of him. You can’t and you won’t. How even dare you to do that? 

‘‘I’m sorry,’’ you whisper and your eyes shift down to the wooden floor of his apartment. ‘‘I’m sorry, Taehyung.’’ You repeat, knowing it’s not enough.

Taehyung gulps and his crossed arms quickly fall to his sides as he realizes that, whatever anger he felt when you told him about what you did, was no longer there the moment he saw how genuinely apologetic you looked. 

‘‘I’m an idiot, I know.’’ You continue, rubbing your clammy hands into the material of your leggings and it does nothing to dry them. ‘‘I’m sorry, Taehyung.’’

He knows he shouldn't be so easily swayed by your apology, but he can’t help but want to cradle you in his arms. And when he does, your eyebrows raise in surprise as you gasp because you weren’t expecting this. 

You expected anger, insults thrown out about how you’re a slut and being kicked out of his apartment with him telling you to never contact him again. 

Taehyung’s still sweet even when his heart is getting broken. 

‘‘It’s okay,’’ he whispers into your hair as one of his hands runs up and down your back ‘‘we can work this out, yeah?’’ 

You bite the tip of your tongue as you take his words in, feeling your heart speeding up even faster than what it was when you spilled everything out on him. Maybe you would’ve preferred him getting angry than his current reaction.

‘‘It’s not like we were exclusive, right?’’ Taehyung chuckles, but it feels like he’s convincing himself that that was the reason as to why it happened. ‘‘Let’s forget it, seriously.’’

A shaky sigh comes out of your mouth as your arms, that hadn’t reciprocated his hug, gain the strength to separate yourself from him. He looks taken aback, but he’s waiting for you to reply in agreement because, yes, you could work this out if you try hard enough. 

But that’s not realistic. Pretending like you never kissed Jungkook is not realistic at all, because it’s sad to admit that you won’t be able to kiss Taehyung again without thinking about your best friend in the back of your head as you’re reminded that not only did you let him kiss you, but you reciprocated and not only did you reciprocate, but you liked it a little too much. 

‘‘Y/N,’’ he speaks up, snapping you from your thoughts,‘‘please, let’s just try.’’ He silently asks─no, begs. 

The barking of his dog, Yeontan, startles you as you come to stare at the little dog at the feet of his owner, who at the moment isn’t interested to see what he wants. You never told Taehyung, but the teacup pomeranian was extremely overprotective of him. 

He’s barking at you like you’re hurting his owner and maybe you aren’t physically doing any damage, but you know that you’re about to break his heart all over again.

‘‘I-I…,’’ you blink as you try to focus on the man in front of you and not the dog on the ground, ‘‘I’m sorry, I can’t.’’ 

Yeontan’s barks increase and Taehyung is at a loss for words to beg you to stay and talk things through. You can still hear the dog’s incessant barking as you make your way down the hall and that’s when the tears you were holding finally fall down. 

‘‘Taehyung’s a nice guy, Y/N. He forgave you and you just left?’’ Minji asks, disbelief in her tone. ‘‘I thought you liked him.’’

‘‘I do!’’ You finally speak up. You’re sure of it, you like Taehyung. Your friend gives you a puzzled look because she really can’t understand you right now. ‘‘I like Taehyung, I really do,’’ you mutter, ‘‘but it’s not fair to him.’’ 

Minji scrunches her face up because there’s only one reason you’re thinking that way. She’s tired of this narrative, it’s old and overdone and it should’ve ended years ago.

She lets out a breathless chuckle, ‘‘You love him, don’t you?’’ Another question that takes you by surprise.

‘‘No, I just─’’

Minji holds her finger up, interrupting you, ‘‘I’m talking about Jungkook.’’ 

This is the attack. Not the other questions she had asked you regarding her old family friend. Not the unannounced arrival to your apartment on an uneventful Saturday morning where you had chosen to stay in bed instead of facing the peaceful yoga instructor. Not the glaring looks she had been giving you for the last minutes.

And if you weren’t ready for any of those, this one definitely takes the prize. 

‘‘I-I of course I love him,’’ you mumble, ‘‘he’s my friend.’’

Minji smirks as her eyebrows raise, ‘‘No, I’m asking if you’re in love him.’’ 

You’re sure that the feelings that you’ve had for Jungkook have always been platonic. You do love him because he’s your friend and you’re supposed to love your friends. But you know that the love that you have for him is very different from the one you have for anyone else. It might be the history between you two. You’ve been with him through it all, cheering from the sidelines as he accomplishes one milestone after the other. 

‘‘Be honest with me,’’ Minji demands, ‘‘are you in love with Jungkook?’’ she asks once again.

Your eyes well up and your bottom lip is trembling as you look back at your intimidating best friend because your silence is deafening and you’re expecting her to throw the last blow. You think you deserve it. Minji has so much she wants to say, but you look so dejected and she figures that you might’ve just realized it. 

‘‘Hey, it’s okay.’’ She comes up to you quickly, crouching down as she looks up at the tears rolling down your reddened cheeks. ‘‘Y/N, it’s okay.’’ 

You’ve been trying to tell yourself the same thing the past few days. 

It’s okay that you kissed your best friend. It’s okay that you’ve slowly and silently started harbouring feelings for him. It’s okay that you just realized you’ve been in love with him for a while now. It’s okay that you’ve been resenting the fact that he didn’t choose you all those years ago. It’s okay that you take care of and love his daughter like she’s yours. 

But...

‘‘No, it’s not.’’ You cry, ‘‘I can’t do that, Minji, he’s not mine to have.’’ 

Your mind quickly brings you back to the harsh reality, which is that Jungkook will never be yours. He probably only kissed you because he was looking for something that was capable of exciting him again after realizing how bored of his marriage he is. He doesn’t love you like that, he’ll never love you like that.

Minji can’t disagree with what you just said, but she also feels like right now is not the time to make you feel even worse when it’s obvious you’re already there. 

‘‘I blocked his number, anyway.’’ You mumble out, wiping away your tears. 

Your friend’s eyes widened at the revelation, ‘‘What?’’. 

‘‘I freaked out after I talked to Taehyung because I felt so guilty and you know how I don’t know how to deal with shit ever, so I just─’’ You stop yourself from rambling and sigh as you feel Minji’s hand squeezing your knee as a sign of comfort, ‘‘I can’t see him again without thinking about it. I can’t take care of Sunhi knowing he’s going home to sleep with Jiwoo. I just can’t keep pretending anymore.’’ 

Minji can’t do much after that, you’ve become a sobbing mess and the tears seem unstoppable. She’s never seen you like this and it dawns on her that you’ve held all of this in for way too long. 

It’s ironic because she’s always told you that you need space from Jungkook, thinking it’d be good for you to finally realize that you’re not part of his list of priorities anymore and hadn’t been for a long time. 

But she hadn’t taken into account what the after effects of not having him in your life anymore would look like.

[12:03 PM] Jeon Jungkook: hi y/n 

{Error: Undelivered!} 

[12:04 PM] Jeon Jungkook: hey???

{Error: Undelivered!}

[12:07 PM] Jeon Jungkook: i wanted to see if you’d like to meet up for lunch one of these days? i feel like we need to talk 

{Error: Undelivered!}

[5:13 PM] Jeon Jungkook: does this work now??

{Error: Undelivered!}

Jungkook groans in annoyance as he finds another one of his texts left undelivered. It feels like life is either against him or doing this for his own good. 

Nonetheless, he wants to talk to you because it’s been a few days since he last saw and heard from you. He figures you’re mad, the last words you spoke to him didn’t sound friendly at all and he wonders if maybe leaving without saying goodbye that day was the right thing to do. 

The small snores coming from beside him make him realize Sunhi is finally asleep and he can’t help but let out a sigh of disappointment as he watches her curl into a fetal like position, clutching her Dumbo plush toy and slightly drooling into his favorite pillow, making him pout because he knows he won’t be able to pry it away from her when he decides to fall asleep too. 

Sunhi being fast asleep is supposed to bring peace to Jungkook’s tiring day, though the silence is extremely uncomfortable and these days he’s come to realize how much he rather have his daughter running around and yelling in excitement than this.

Complete and utter silence.

[7:13 PM] Jeon Jungkook: (1.jpg attached) sunhi misses auntie y/n!! she’s been asking me about you a lot 

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[7:15 PM] Jeon Jungkook: i miss auntie y/n more tho…

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[7:17 PM] Jeon Jungkook: i hope ur alright :)

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‘‘Pumpkin, you can stop smiling already.’’ Jungkook chuckles as he looks up from his phone, noticing his daughter still holding the big smile he had given him when he requested to take a picture of her to send to you. ‘‘I already sent the picture to Auntie Y/N.’’ He informs and she sighs with relief, massaging her cheeks from straining them too hard.

Though his eyebrows furrow, noticing his messages have once again been left undelivered. He makes a mental note to call the phone company soon, because it’s been over a week since he last sent the first messages and those remained in the same state as well. 

‘‘Daddy, unpause!’’ Sunhi demands, making him realize that he’s in the middle of showing her his favorite Pixar movie, Cars. 

Twenty minutes had passed and for a majority of them Sunhi had only watched attentively and Jungkook looked over at her every other second just to make sure she hadn’t fallen asleep. Warmness spread throughout him as he noticed his daughter looking at the screen with those big doe eyes she had inherited from him. 

Once the scene where Sally shows Lightning McQueen around Radiator Springs, Jungkook feels a tug at his sweatshirt and looks down to notice Sunhi’s little hand grabbing at the fabric, her eyes are still glued to the screen.

“Auntie Y/N likes this too?” She asks and Jungkook chuckles because his daughter can’t stop thinking about his friend even when doing anything completely unrelated to you.

Maybe that’s another thing she inherited as well.

[7:03 PM] Jeon Jungkook: so i called my phone company and asked them abt why my messages aren’t being delivered and they said that you must’ve blocked me

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[7:04 PM] Jeon Jungkook: yeah i guess you did

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Jungkook’s mind has gone blank ever since he got off the phone with the cellphone company. 

The idea that you might’ve blocked his number had not once crossed his mind during the weeks of undelivered texts and phone calls sent straight to voicemail. It was obvious, but he didn’t think you’d be capable of doing it. 

He wanted it to be a network issue or something else that he could put blame on instead of facing the realization that you had shut him out from your life. And that thought hurt, no─stung him. 

The worst part is that he knows he deserves it. It was foolish of him to think that you had enjoyed the kiss too. Dumb enough to believe that you might’ve reciprocated the way he felt. 

Jungkook doesn’t want to think this is the end, maybe it’s that stupid voice inside his head that always holds on to things that he knows he should let go of. But he can’t just let go of this and move on. 

He doesn’t remember what life was like before you and he sure as hell does not want to know what it’ll be like without you.

[1:30 AM] Jeon Jungkook: i miss you so fucking much i’m sorry if i knew that kissing you would’ve fucked everything up htne i woudl’ve never done it y/n i’m sorry 

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[1:31 AM] Jeon Jungkook: i really wanted to kiss you but it was selfish of me to do it i didnt think about what you must’ve felt im sos sorry 

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[1:32 AM] Jeon Jungkook: sunhi’s been asking me about yoj and i dont even know what to say anymore

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[2:27 AM] Jeon Jungkook: i don’t even care if you dont wanna speak to me anymore i fucked this up for sunhi she loves you so much and you’re her favorite person ever and i ruined it for her just bc i wanted to see if you felt the same way as i do

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[3:50 AM] Jeon Jungkook: i miss you y/n i really do 

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“Daddy, lemme go!” Sunhi whines trying to escape from her father’s hands as he finishes applying the sunscreen on her arms, “Daddy!”.

He gives her a stern look and the toddler huffs, sticking her bottom lip out in an act of annoyance. The playground games are waiting for her and she feels like her dad is just coming between them and her.

“Alright,” he pats his big hands on her tiny arms, “you’re good to—“ Jungkook isn’t able to finish his sentence because his daughter’s already running towards one of the slides, “Sunhi, be careful!” He reminds her, but she’s too focused on the rides than on her dad’s warning.

Jungkook sighs and relaxes into the bench. 

“She’s precious,” She comments with a small smile as her attention focuses on the little girl having the time of her life going down the slide, “I’m surprised she’s yours.” 

Jungkook looks over at the woman beside him and scoffs, but he can’t help but agree. Sunhi is too good and too pure, the best thing he’s ever done in his life. 

“Yeah, well, it’s all her.” Jungkook admits, eyes focusing back on Sunhi, “She’s really great.” 

There’s an uncomfortable silence between them and Jungkook has to clear his throat to gain her attention. 

“I’m sorry I couldn’t meet up at a café,” Jungkook apologizes and nods over at his daughter, “she’s been a little misbehaved lately, you said you wanted to talk to me and I figured that if I took Sunhi to a place like that she’d just—“

She interrupts his rambling, “Hey, it’s okay. I have no problem, really.” She assures him and he nods slightly, “I haven’t been in a place like this in a long time.” 

Jungkook scratches the back of his neck and glances over at the woman who’s looking at him with an expression he can’t quite pinpoint. It makes him so nervous that he quickly shifts his gaze to the ground.

“This is so weird.” He admits with an awkward chuckle and she raises her eyebrow, “I mean—you hate me, Minji, so I don’t know what you want to talk about.” 

“I don’t hate you!” Minji laughs and Jungkook finally looks at her and she falters, “Seriously! I only dislike you and that’s saying a lot.” 

He supposes that’s a good thing, considering how aggressive Minji used to be towards him back in college. Always letting him know how much she despised his guts, how he didn’t deserve to have you as his friend and even once threw a drink at his face during a party; though you swore to him she was drunk and that she didn’t mean it.

Jungkook hadn’t seen her much since, only a few times if it was your birthday and they managed to cross paths, because the girl made sure she was never in the same room as him. The times it happened, he felt like she was throwing daggers at him through her eyes. 

“It always bothered me how putty in your hands she was for you,” Minji begins, crossing her arms over her chest as she settles back into the bench, “and how oblivious you were about it.” 

Jungkook looks back at her and there’s a small smile on her face, most likely looking over at his daughter. 

“How when we got together for study sessions, she’d be tired because she was taking care of you the night before at one of those stupid frat parties you loved dragging her to.” Minji recalls and Jungkook feels like his mouth has gone dry from the memory.

She crosses one of her legs over the other, “Or that whole Jiwoo ordeal, how you had practically put Y/N aside once you managed to date the ‘campus hottie’.” She says with air quotes and Jungkook sighs, remembering the beginning of it all.

He knows that he can’t turn back time and change it all. Even if he could, he knows he wouldn’t. If there was no Jiwoo, there’d be no Sunhi. 

An excited yell startles him as he looks over at his daughter, swinging up and down. “Look, daddy! I'm flying!” She calls and he smiles at her. 

“Jesus, that’s fucking precious.” Minji mumbles, but he hears her nonetheless and nods in agreement. “Anyway, I’m not going to act like a saint here and pretend I was vouching for you, because I never did.” 

Jungkook knows. Back then he didn’t understand why Minji was so adamant about trash talking him to you, considering how he and her barely knew each other. Actually, whatever knowledge they had of the other was through of you. 

But Jungkook’s done a lot of self reflecting for the past month and a half and he’s realized why Minji disliked him so much. Or, dislikes. Either way, it’s valid.

“I just wanted her to snap out of it,” she confesses, “and realize that there is a life beyond you. That there’s more than being your best friend and your daughter’s babysitter. That she’s capable of moving on and putting you aside, because if you did that to her then why shouldn’t she?” 

Jungkook hadn’t thought about any of that at all. He had realized he had been a shitty friend, but the idea of just how much definitely hadn’t settled on him. He wishes you knew how much he’s cared about you, but that there were too many overlapping lines for him to ever express it.

“I thought that after setting her up with Taehyung she had finally realized it,” she continues “but you know how she is, she rarely lets up and I knew she wasn’t going to let you go that easily.” 

Jungkook draws in a long breath, rubbing his now clammy hands in his jeans as he looks back towards Minji. 

“I mean, she couldn’t let her go that easily.” She jerks her head towards Sunhi, still sitting on the swings, though she’s slowed down now. “She loves that little girl so damn much.” 

Jungkook’s sure of this. He recognizes the immense love you have for Sunhi, how sincere and unconditional it is. It’s the way a mother loves her child, though he never expected it to come from you instead. He’s not surprised though, because it’s the same love you gave to him. But it’s louder, there are no boundaries that you needed to respect to show Sunhi just how much you loved her, unlike with him. 

It dawns on him that cutting him off must’ve been hard. You probably wanted to do it for way longer and only stayed because of Sunhi and Jungkook doesn’t want to think about the dilemma you must’ve went through to finally do it this time around. 

He runs his hands through his hair, letting out a shaky breath, remembering that Sunhi doesn’t have you anymore. That’s the reason as to why she’s been so misbehaved lately, crying way too often, throwing tantrums over the smallest of things. Jungkook could blame it on the fact that she’s soon turning four and maybe it’s something that comes with age, it might just be a coincidence that she’s acting this way during a time you’re no longer present in her life.

This is the thing Sunhi might not be able to forgive him for.

“Minji,” he finally speaks up and the woman beside him focuses his gaze back on him, “I miss her so much.” He mumbles, not trusting himself to speak up because he might choke back a sob.

“Only now?” 

“No!” He says this a little too harshly and Minji jumps slightly at the tone in his voice, “I’ve always missed her and I’m fucking idiot for realizing too late.” 

She hums and Jungkook’s chest rises and falls with rapid breaths, “She’s my first thought when I wake up and when I finally manage to go to sleep. Sunhi constantly reminds me about her, asking me where she is and when can she see her and I have to force myself to lie.” 

Jungkook doesn’t realize Minji’s hand is now awkwardly placed on his back, hesitantly tapping as if to give him some comfort. It’s weird to see him like this, she had convinced herself that the guy didn’t have any feelings when it came to you.

“She blocked my number, I can’t call her and all my texts have been left undelivered. I’ve driven by her apartment building too many times with the plan to go up and talk to her, but I always back out because I’m an idiot and I know she’ll hate me if I do that and I—“

“Jungkook.” 

“I just want to know if she still cares, I don’t mind if she doesn’t feel the same way. But I want to know that Y/N still cares about Sunhi and me. Do you know? Does she? Could you please—“

Jungkook’s ramble is interrupted by the crying sounds of Sunhi, who’s now on the ground as she sobs and he quickly stands up to go straight towards her. He blinks away the tears that had formed in his eyes because there’s only room for one crying baby here.

“Pumpkin, what happened?” He asks in a soft voice, crouching down at her level and she’s pouting as she points at her bloody knee. “Did you fall down?” She nods and he sighs, picking her up as he takes her back to the bench where Minji waits with expectancy to check on the little girl.

Jungkook places Sunhi beside her and looks through his daughter’s bag for the emergency kit he carried around. He cleans the blood delicately with a gauze and alcohol, making the little girl wince and yelp out an ‘ouch!’ as she holds tightly to Minji’s thigh. 

“It’s okay, Pumpkin.” He reassures her with a smile, making his daughter nod because she trusts her dad, “It was an accident and accidents are part of growing up, right?” She nods again and Minji figures this isn’t a first for her.

Once the blood has been cleaned, Jungkook places a cute rainbow patterned bandaid on the wound in her knee. 

“There we go,” he announces and Sunhi lets out the breath she’d been holding, ‘‘all done! Are you good now?” 

“Yes,” Sunhi weakly replies, “daddy, I wanna go home.” 

Jungkook’s eyebrows raise in surprise, but the look on her face tells him that she’s probably still shaken by the accident and most likely wants to take a nap to forget about it.

He looks over at Minji with an apologetic look and she gives him half a smile, “Go, it’s alright.” 

Jungkook nods and takes Sunhi in his arms, which she gladly accepts and settles her head in the crook of his neck. Minji’s ready to leave, figuring there was no point in staying any longer.

“Minji, wait!” He stops her before she goes, making her turn around and offer him a curious look, “Sunhi’s birthday is in a few weeks and,” Jungkook reaches for something inside his daughter’s bag, “she really wants Y/N to be there.” He whispers, taking out a party invitation to hand over to Minji.

She smirks, looking at the personalized invitation for his daughter’s fourth birthday, “Just Sunhi?” She asks and he lets out a breathless laugh.

“Me too.” Jungkook adds and a small smile appears on his face as he says it. “Uh—thank you for talking to me, I know it must’ve been hard.” 

Minji swats her hand in the air, “It’s alright, just wanted to make sure how you and the kid were doing. It’s all she talks about anyway.” 

A gasp escapes his lips and he holds on to his daughter tighter as she nuzzles her face farther in. 

“I’ll give her the card, but—I can’t guarantee if she’ll go.” She warns and he nods, understanding.

Though he does not like the possible outcome, he settles down with the idea that you’ll notice how even though you both haven’t spoken towards each other in almost two months, he’s still thinking about you either way. Every day. 

[hufflautia]

Where it all started [Part 1]

Chapter 1 

Sometimes links don’t appear on posts. if you can’t see the link to “Chapter 1”, my masterlist is pinned to the top of my blog, and you can find it there.

Summary: Slytherin’s parents have another argument, but at this point, no one’s surprised. After all, they’re her parents. It would be abnormal if they didn’t argue. However, this one’s a biggie. The fight ends with the slam of a door and her dad packing his bags into the car and getting ready to leave. Desperate for him to come back, Slytherin’s mom forces her to go to him with a message that will surely make him stay. Buckle up folks, for this is where it all began. 

Slytherin stood on the sidewalk as she watched her dad pack up his things into the van. 

She dug her fingernails into her arm, her heart stinging with ache as her dad turned around with a smile on his face, a failed attempt to reassure her that it was going to be ok. It was all gonna be ok. After all, this was normal, right? It’s not like it was unusual that her dad was leaving again to go back to Florida, where the homewrecker waited for him, her outstretched hands eagerly opened up to him and his credit card. 

However, this was the first time he left abruptly. A spike of sorrow stabbed at Slytherin’s heart as she thought back to the sound of her parents’ door abruptly opening; soon after, she could hear angry stomps that quickly descended down the steps of the staircase. 

She could almost hear the hiss in her ear as she stood in the archway of the living room, watching her dad leave in the far distance. “Tell him that Ravenclaw’s crying,” her mother spat, pushing her towards the front door. “Quickly, before he leaves!” 

Slytherin internally sighed. How typical. Instead of resolving their relationship issues by going to couples therapy, her mom decided to throw all those burdens onto her daughter, who had already grown tragically used to being used as her puppet. 

She decided not to argue against going after her dad and trying to guilt-trip him into staying home as her mom wanted. Otherwise, she would be lectured on how she’s selfish and wouldn’t do this small thing for her mom, how she’s basically ruining this family by letting her dad leave, how family is so fucking important and manipulating her dad into staying would be vital to their happiness as a whole, how family this and family that. 

You get the point. Slytherin certainly did. That’s why she was currently standing awkwardly behind her dad, staring at his back as he lifted boxes into his car. 

“Um, Raven…” She paused. Her throat felt dry and tight. Swallowing with difficulty, she tried again. “Ravenclaw’s crying.” 

It wasn’t the crying itself that mattered. That wasn’t the main reason why her mom rushed her out the door to deliver the message to her dad. It was simply the fact that it was Ravenclaw who was crying. Let’s just say that he and his dad had a complicated relationship. 

Things were never the same between them after Ravenclaw sent an angry message to him via text when he was in Florida a year ago. The contents of the message reeked of disdain for his constant infidelity. When his mom found out, she shoved the phone into Slytherin’s face in the dead of night and asked if she knew about this. The glaring light from the screen nearly blinded her. 

Slytherin read the text messages through squinted eyes and could make out a few curse words here and there. Though she was slightly disoriented from the sudden ambush of information, it was clear to her that her brother resented their dad for what he did.  

That made Ravenclaw’s anguish even more useful in their mom’s opinion. Seeing the tears streak down his face when he heard that his dad was leaving again, she had a glorious idea. Perhaps if her husband knew of their son’s sorrow, he would reconsider his abrupt departure. After all, it was Ravenclaw who was crying. 

If it were Hufflepuff, that would be understandable—she can get quite emotional sometimes. But it was Ravenclaw, who was usually guarded and distant. One might suggest that he was secretly broken inside. But that’s not the point, at least not in his mom’s opinion. The main thing she was concerned about was that she could use his misery to her advantage! Maybe if her husband knew of his sadness, he would feel guilty enough to stay behind. After all, if his son, who despised him, was upset over his departure, perhaps it wouldn’t be so bad to stay home and endure his wife’s temper for a little while longer. 

Slytherin’s words did produce somewhat of a reaction. Her dad didn’t turn around for a while, but when he did, his eyes were slightly red and puffy. It was evident that he was trying to hold back his tears. One might think that this means that he’ll stay. He seemed distraught over the news that his son was crying because of his leave. Surely, he’ll stay, right? 

It wasn’t enough. Nothing ever seems to be enough.

“I’ll be back soon, okay?” He hugged her briefly and gave a light squeeze as a sign of reassurance. As a silent message that it was going to be ok. Even though everything was most definitely not okay. A thousand hugs and gestures of reassurance wouldn’t change this. 

Slytherin didn’t react angrily to his refusal, the unspoken declaration of No, I will not go back home. In fact, it seemed as if she didn’t react at all. However, if one were paying close attention, they would notice the sparkle in her eyes dim. But maybe there wasn’t a sparkle to begin with. She had been enduring this shit for so long that she forgot what it was like to be normal, to feel like the white kid you see in commercials, the one who seemed to radiate mirth, a type of energy that said, I don’t have a care in the world because life is so fucking great and I can’t stop smiling. She didn’t even bother to smile, a common facial expression when one is in a difficult situation and tries to diffuse the somber atmosphere by slapping a facade on their face, the corners of their lips upturned to form a grimace that resembles some sort of a smile—a twisted kind of smile, that’s for sure. Why should she pretend that everything was okay when it wasn’t? Instead, she merely nodded in response. 

When her dad pulled away to pack the last box into the trunk, she took a deep breath to diminish the familiar sense of abandonment that flooded her senses, to clear the warning signs that flashed in her mind. He’s leaving! Your dad is leaving! He’s abandoning you again. You’re apparently not important enough for him to stay. 

She stared at the ground, only looking up when she heard the sound of a car door slamming shut. The resounding click was all it took for the waterfalls to finally pour from her eyes, for it was at this moment when she realized that this was actually happening. This was no dream—it was reality. Her sad, devastating reality. Tears blurred her vision as she watched the car drive away, leaving her in the dust. 

Slytherin gasped in erratic breaths between her broken sobs as her eyes hung onto the tiny speck that resembled her dad who was driving 

away, 

away, 

and a-w-a-y.

Through the jumble of thoughts that clashed in her head, one thing was clear. Her dad was her dad, but only sometimes. 

Tears streaking down her face, she tried to soothe her pain with the belief that he would be back soon. If only she had known that it would be a while before he returned. If only he hadn’t left. Perhaps things would’ve been different for her if he stayed, for this was where it started. 

This marked the beginning of it all.   

Comments and reblogs are a writer’s gold!

MASTERLIST ; sometimes links don’t appear on posts. if you can’t see the link to “MASTERLIST”, the masterlist itself is pinned to the top of my blog. check it out if you haven’t already! 

Author’s note: HI! Were you surprised to see that I posted two fics in a row?? I hope you enjoyed this. Most of it was unfortunately based on what happened to me a year or two ago. I based Ravenclaw on my brother, who did actually cry when my dad was leaving after an argument, and yes, my wack mother did force me to run after my dad to tell him. One of the few differences is that I’m not a drug addict and I’m fine now so dont worry. 

Idk how I feel about this series, it is a lot darker from what I usually write. I know I’m gonna have to write more for creative writing class, so maybe i will continue it. I will try to think of how to turn these fics into something more positive, because this stuff is very heavy and depressing. however, that will be a little difficult because the plot itself is naturally drab. however, i will try to think of a happy ending for Faye/Slytherin. 

Shall we look at some wholesome pictures? 

lmaoaoa i pasted this picture from the internet and tumblr glitched and pushed the pic all the way to the top. imagine seeing this dog at the beginning of the fic, that would be funny :’) 

AWWWWWW I THINK THIS MIGHT BE MY FAVORITE

ok hold up i just realized that is probably a stuffed animal 😐 this is so embarassing lmaoaoa when i saw it i was like THAT IS SO FRICKIN CUTE

OK WAIT WTF NOW I THINK ITS AN ACTUAL DOG??? CAN SOMEONE HELP AND TELL ME IF ITS REAL OR NOT?!! at first, i thought it was real, but then i looked at the paws and it looked kinda fake and i was like this dog is too fluffy and wholesome to be real. BUT THEN I LOOKED AGAIN and i think the owners just put the pooh outfit over the dog?? what is going on with my brain.. but at the same time, its 2 am for me rn so maybe i should get some sleep BUT FIRST, LETS LOOK AT MORE DOGS <3 (lmaoaoa i feel like my friend would say “gosh ur such a hufflepuff” (menna im talking about u lmao omg hey gorl)) 

After seeing this gryffindor pup, i immediately searched up “dog costumes hufflepuff” lmaoooooo

OK THATS ENOUGH DOGS FOR NOW. Part 2 is coming soon. I already have it ready but I might not post it right away. 

That’s all for now. Be sure to let me know what you think. TOODELOOO!

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[hello-yue-here]

About your atla ship songs, I have a couple of questions (sorry if my phrasing comes out wrong, english isn't my first language and I worry it might across as accidentally defensive): how did you end up with the choices for zukka, jetko and yuekka (note: I haven't seen the great comet, so feel free to obsess over it, I'm intrigued now and the hype is appreciated!)? Sidenote: I think the mailee choice is HILARIOUS and the tokka one just make me sad, I didn't expect to be attacked like this😭

kdjfha;s i love you im gonna obsess SO HARD over great comet now. you may regret this

this is gonna be so long so the rest is under the cut whoops

yuekka: no one else from great comet

where do i even begin. WHERE DO I EVEN BEGIN

okay so background information on this show: it's based off of a 76 oages excerpt from war and peace and its centered around a woman named natasha (and this guy pierre but he's irrelevant to this song so we wont worry about him) and natasha's bethrothed is off fighting in the war right now. she hasn't seen him in a while but she is in love with him.

every single lyrics of this song SCREAMS yuekka to me. the innocence and purity of their love. the love at first sight. and even the melancholy ending just- i go apeshit for this song. i love this song so much. and denee benton's voice??? kljsdhflwksugf please listen to this song if you haven't already. listen to the whole show. your life will be changed forever.

onto the lyrics (i stg this is ab to be the whole song whoops)

"the moon"

THOSE ARE THE FIRST WORDS ON THE SONG. natasha and andre (her bethrothed) met underneath the moonlight. Sokka and Yue first spoke to eachother at night and always met each other for their most intimate moments under the moonlight. also yue is LITERALLY the moon so like: right of the bat with those two words it's yuekka.

"and i saw your eyes / and i saw your smile / and the world opened wide"

sokka fell in love with yue the moment he saw her in the canal. she literally enchanted this motherfucker. everything about her made his heart go crazy. and 'the world opened wide' to me is from yue's perspective. Yue had never left the north pole and sokka had seen a good chuck of the world at the point. He took her on appa, he told her about his adventures. he saw the world yue wished to see and you know damn well that Sokka would have done anything to give it to her.

"oh the moon /oh the snow in the moonlight / and your childlike eyes and your distant smile / ill never be this happy again / you and i and no one else"

natasha sings fondly about the moon and the snow, seeing as it was where she fell in love with andre. yue and sokka LITERALLY fell in love in the same place: in the snowy nothern water tribe under the light of the moon. childlike eyes: THEYRE CHILDREN!!! distant smile: this is where it gets a little sad. theyre both children with way too many duties during a world that has known nothing but war for the past century. they want to be happy but yeah, theyre smiles are distant and far away because happiness seems out of reach for them most of the time. i'll never be this happy again: the moments yue and sokka shared together were probably the happiest either of them ever were. they were able to ignore the war and the world in the moments they shared together. and with no one else. no one else would be able to give each other this sense of peace and happiness and love.

"joy and life inside our souls / and no body knows just you and me / it's our secret"

Yue and Sokka had to sneak out in secret at night to go and see each other. Yue and Sokka couldn't be together for real because Yue was already engaged, but they were literally in love so she decided to see him anyways in secret. kasdjfhklasjd im losing my mind over them at this point.

"this winer sky / how can anyone sleep / there was never such a night before / i feel like putting my arms around my knees / and squeezing tight as possible / and flying away"

these are my FAVORITE lines in the entire song. yue and sokka had never felt this strongly about anyone before and that's why they are so drawn to each other. they had never experienced love before and they wanted to hold onto it for as long as they could even though they knew they couldnt. Sokka takes yue up on appa and she is wistful and wishes she could live like he does every day: ie flying away. oh my god these two deserved so much better. so much fucking better.

now for the saddes part. the saddest fucking part.

"maybe he'll come today / maybe he came already / and he's sitting in the drawing room / and i simply forgot"

natasha misses andre so intensely at this point. when i first listened to this show and heard this song i was like "wait a min... is andre like... dead?" and im sure i wasnt the only person who assumed that this was why natasha felt so sad by the end of such a beautiful song. (spoiler alert andre is fine)

but this line really exemplifies how sad natasha is, and hints at the fact that andre may never come back. it implies that their relationship is doomed (at least in my opinion) and that's all yuekka. Sokka misses yue intensely when shes gone. Yue accepted her fate almost immediately but sokka was in denial. he thought there had to be another way. but in the end it wasn't meant to be. and sokka will go on, loving yue, wishing for her back, even though it's not possible.

fuck im gonna cry.

zukka: all i've ever known- hadestown

"i was alone so long / i didn't even know that i was lonely / out in the cold so long / i didnt even know that i was cold"

sokka is from the swt so theres where the cold comes in. also in the gaang (initially) it was just him katara and aang. and katara and aang were much closer to each other than sokka was with aang and the two of them were benders so sokka was kind of an outsider with the two of them. He also represses a lot of his emotions and feels the need to do everything himself so i do see a lot of loneliness in sokka. and the fact that so many people in his life have left him (his mom, yue, his dad, suki briefly, etc...) he is known to keep people at an arms length. i see a lot of loneliness in sokka.

zuko's loneliness is a lot more obvious: he has literally been cast out and abandoned by everyone except iroh. and even then he still feels the need to be alone (remember zuko alone? thought so) these boys look after themselves and push others away and revel in their loneliness in order to keep themselves from getting hurt. at least in my opinion on canon and also some fanon because id be a liar if i said fanon didnt influence how i view ALL my ships (not just zukka)

"all ive ever known is how to hold my own / but now I wanna hold you too"

COME ONE MANNNN, they just wanna hold each other. theyre both very big protectors as well and kljhflkasdhg they wanna protect eachother like kljdhfl im gonna lose it rn.

"You take me in your arms / And suddenly there's sunlight all around me / Everything bright and warm / And shining like it never did before / And for a moment I forget / Just how dark and cold it gets"

SUNLIGHT SYMBOLISM. zuko is literally powered by the sun. i don't think i even NEED to elaborate on this one anymore lol. They find comfort in each other away from all of their trauma. when they're together nothing else matters and i personally love that for them. they both deserve love.

"I knew you before we met / And I don't even know you yet / All I know is your someone I have always known"

these two are extremely similar in canon. many parallels. older brothers overshadowed by their prodigy little sisters. longing to make their fathers proud (granted one dad is good and one is fuckin evil), both are pretty bad with emotions. both are seen protecting others before themselves (sokka protecting suki during the serpant's pass, sokka protecting toph on like multiple occassions, zuko protecting katara in the final agni kai), the list goes on. they know who the other is because they see themselves in the other person. they already know each other because they are each other (in a way, not entirely, but the similarities are strong in my opinion)

"I'm gonna hold you forever / The wind will never change on us / Long as we stay with each other / Then it will always be like this"

i just think this line is so cute and sweet (ignoring all the symbolism and foreshadowing that comes with the last line in the musical itself. im gonna pretend this is nothing but happy) and i think these boys deserve happiness so yeah. this song is zukka to me lol.

jetko: thrill of first love- falsettoes

if you've never listened to this song go an do it now. you will know INSTANTLY that it is jetko because of the dynamics alone. marvin and whizzer are pure jetko and i take no crticisms.

marvin and whizzer are both extremely stubborn, and they don't always get along, and they fight a lot, and they get mad at each other a lot, and they are both passionate as hell, and they will bring this passion into everything. they love each other that is without a doubt, but they arent perfect and they are once again stubborn and determined as fuck.

sound familiar? it's literally jetko.

the lyrics aren't what remind me of jetko, but the dynamic itself. the lyrics are too on the nose for a gay couple in 1970's america so that rlly cant apply to jetko all that much. but the way these two characters bounce off of each other and get annoyed with each other and argue with eachother reminds me of jetko. because let's be honest: these two are the most stubborn characters in the whole show. they will fight for what they believe and it will take literally everything to change their minds.

i love jetko but i think they would have petty arguments all the time and get aggravated by one another so easily. and this is even seen in canon: they work so fucking well together but they did not even HESITATE to fight one another after neither of them would give in and let the fight about whether jet was right or wrong about zuko being a firebender. like i cannot say it enough they are stubborn as fuck.

but underneath all that stubborn pettiness and bickering: marvin and whizzer still love each other. and jet and zuko would still love each other. because even though they are stubborn when it comes to arguments, they are even more stubborn and determined when it comes to each other. these two passionate motherfuckers are in love.

(now when i chose this song i decided to ignore the fact that this song literally spells out the fact that marvin and whizzer's relatinoship is doomed because they literally say passion dies. thats the difference between jetko and whizzer and marvin because i dont think passion dies. i chose this song strictly for the bickering lmao)

and i know you didnt ask about tokka but,,,,

i rlly wanna talk about the tokka one

so im going to

tokka: on my own- les mis

look. i KNOW this song is about unrequited love and i love tokka as a couple but,,, the unrequited love in this song just SCREAMS unrequited tokka to me so thats what i went with.

eponine is a girl who has neglectful parents who lives life by her own rules: toph. eponine is shown to be tough and confident and spunky to others but behind all of that she has emotions, she feels love, she hides her vulnerability so much: toph. she is in love with a guy she cant be with because he loves someone else: TOPH

eponine is toph to a t and toph is eponine to a t. this is not up for debate lmao

"without him i feel his arms around me"

toph is always seen grabbing onto someone (and its almost ALWAYS sokka) when she's somewhere where she can't use her feet to see. FEEL and ARMS cmon. look at it.

"and i know / i know that he is blind"

COME ON. IMAGINE TOPH SINGING THIS LINE. this line is already powerful enough in les mis but having toph, a blind character, sing it just makes the symbolism even deeper. toph sees the potential relationship they could have together. toph sees that sokka is oblivious to this. toph is not blind to the truth or the potention, but sokka is blind to her feelings. im about to lose my mind over this line.

"I love him / But every day I'm learning / All my life / I've only been pretending / Without me / His world will go on turning / A world that's full of happiness / That I have never known"

i need to sit down for a moment. toph grew up in a household where her parents did not understand her. she has learned to hide her true emotions and vulnerabilities from everyone. and its the fact that toph knows that she and sokka will never be together and the fact that she still loves him in spite of that is what makes this even more heartbreaking.

"but only on my own"

TOPH AND EPONINE SWEETIES I LOVE YOU

thank you for indulging my theatre kid nonsense. you are very sweet and kind and lovely and awesome and i hope you have a lovely day bestie :) <3

ask me why i think these songs go with these ships

[djemsostylist]

Djem's Legion Thoughts

About three years ago my brother joking suggested I read the Horus Heresy, knowing literally nothing about Warhammer. (Literally nothing. I just thought Space Marines were big dudes in armor and I had never heard of Primarchs and I still know nothing of 40k. Have no idea how the Heresy ends--I'm spoiler free babes.) Anyway, what follows are my feelings on each Legion at the following times:

As of midway through Fulgrim

At the end of First Heretic

At the start of the Master of Mankind

Halfway through the Siege

This is very long. I'm not sorry.

Dark Angels

idk I haven’t met them yet, but their name tells me they are either going to be amazing or fucking awful

Um I still dk

God I fucking love these stupid idiots. Like, they are stupid, for sure, but I dunno, I dig their bizarre sort of pseudosecrecy thing. Plus, aesthetically I’m all about weird monk orders. Also, nothing kills me quite like Farith Redloss having anxiety attacks over trying to figure out Lion.

Corswain showing up like the living embodiment of the dude with the pizza where the apartment is on fire is just so deeply on brand for these chucklefucks like, Lion is all “I’m deeply uncomfortable where Imperial Secundus is concerned so instead I’ll just go ahead and attack home planets because that will demoralize the traitors and then I’m Doing My Part” like fam, pretty much all the traitors sans Perturabo are actual literal demons rn and they all had zero qualms betraying their immediate brothers and also the emperor (and Perturabo already fucked over his own) why in the livid fuck would you think this is in any way helpful, but this is Classic Lion and I love him now on account of that one time when he hugged Roboute because he was proud of him and also because he calls all of his sons “Little Brother” bc he is afraid of being a dad and also because I too am deeply avoidant of issues I don’t want to deal with.

Emperor's Children

mostly wonderful, because they are fabulous and also extremely extra, but they have the most ginourmous fuckwad as a Lord Commander, BUT they have a very good boy as another one, so idk really. Plus the whole betrayal thing and the fucking lodges, but they are purple and fabulous, so, +1?

These are the saddest boys ever in the whole world, and they didn’t deserve what happened to them. I loved them all except for Eidolon and they didn’t deserve anything bad to happen to them ever bc they were precious and I loved them. Also Fabius because he was bugnuts and he hurt my boys.

Jesus, I’m so fucking over them all

Honestly I’m so tired

Iron Warriors

I totally confused them with the Iron Hands. Idk even, boring? But Perturabo (while he has a fucking terrible name) also hates Horus so +15

I still know nothing about them, but I think they are buttholes because of the whole Isstvan V thing. Dick move guys, dick move.

I literally can’t. Like, their entire shtick is besieging and being besieged, and then being pissy bc it is what they are good at???? Like, they are literally traitoring bc their dad got a hair up his ass bc he wasn’t a good independent thinker and didn’t think he was allowed to build castles or whatever? Idk they are exhausting except for the ones that aren’t

I still don’t really get them at all except like 99% of them who aren’t named Barabas Dantioch are asshats and are not independent thinkers who are literally still traitoring for reasons unknown except to stick it to the emperor like?? Get an actual culture??? Just literally stop???

White Scars

I dunno, haven’t met them, but since no one else talks about them, I’m gonna guess, boring?

I dunno but they are worried about them hooking up with the Rout so I guess they are cool?

Oh bless your tiny little souls. They are so sweet, and so, so dumb. But sweet.

They are very, very good boys. They don’t have a ton of range per say but their simplicity is sort of the point I think. They are what space marines are supposed to be, and I love them for that

Space Wolves

ehm, oh, I’m sorry, The Rout. Whateverthefuck, they’re boring, over-the-top fuckheads who are giant fucking hypocrites who suck and probably don’t ever shower. Honestly, they rival the Emperor’s Children in extraness, and not in the loveable way. Fucking awful, 0/10.

Okay, honestly, not as awful as some. I mean, hella extra and I hate what they did at Prospero, but in a world full of awful things, we gotta pick and choose.

They are just so, so...Space Wolfy. Bless them they try, and some of them legit crack me up. I’m just not about their aesthetic, you know?

Much like the other fuckups amongst the Loyalists, they are a blunt instrument used for a specific purpose and do better with like...direct instruction. I’m saying they are not the kind to do well with metaphor and also a lack of like, a dad. They need TE:BBA is what I’m saying.

Imperial Fists

Literally only met them briefly, but they seem a good sort. I like their Primarch? -3 tho cause damn that color scheme.

Still good boys.

Omg I love you all, you precious little bbs. They are just so calm and stoic and honestly even though yellow is a hideous color they are literally like Templars and that is fantastic?????

Listen, the amount of love that I have in my heart for these precious, perfect boys is rivaled only by my love for Rogal Dorn, who might possibly be, and I don’t wanna sound dramatic here, be the love of my life but anyway.

Night Lords

idk but their name sounds sick.

Right, these guys are also dicks. I hate them on principle.

Every time I think of them all I can think of is that one video of the goths dancing under the bridge. They are so. Fucking. Extra. Christ alive, get a hobby that isn’t fucking skinning people.

Yeah idk they still mostly suck and to be perfectly honest I’m still not entirely sure what their point was, even pre-heresy? Like what role did psychopaths play in TE:BBA’s plan for a glorious human empire, someone explain

Blood Angels

I dunno cause I’ve only ever met their First Captain (who was consorting with fuckheads) but Sanguinius is literally Top Tier Fabulous, like Prince Extra, so I hope they don’t let me down

I’m still holding out hope. Don’t let me down boys.

OH. MY. GOD. Honestly, kill me, I love them so, so, so, so, so much, it’s a lot. And I suspect something terrible will happen with them but I don’t care because they are perfect. All of them. Wonderful, perfect, lovely, caring boys who love their dad and I love them. Sweet, loving, precious little bbs who occasionally suffer from tragic vampiric tendencies but I don’t love them any less. They better stay perfect forever. If I could, I would be like Sangy and just take them all everywhere with me so that they could always be safe <3 On a less gushy note, I think one of the most important aspects of the Blood Angels (and of their primarch) is that while they acknowledge their differences from unmodified humans, they also love humanity, deeply. They see them as worth fighting for and protecting, and acknowledge that their abilities allow them to create a universe that is safe for the common man to live in. There is a sort of profound love and tenderness that they have for humanity, and I think it really does make a difference in their legion. (That scene is Master of Mankind with the Blood Angel and the Custodian really highlights what I’m saying here.)

Listen, this may sound dramatic, and I don’t wanna like, go over the top, but I would literally die for them, which would seem counterproductive since that is what they do for humanity but the amount of love of I have for this entire legion and one Angel is too big to contain in my heart okay

Iron Hands

I don’t know them well yet, but they seem like good boys overall. I’m sure one of them is bound to be a crazy fucker tho.

They are good boys. I don’t know them very well, but my favorite moment is when Ferrus had to thank Lorgar for his help so he made him a crozius and then threw it at him because he didn’t want to have to talk awkwardly.

Poor sad bbs

No, but really, poor sad bbs

World Eaters

literally terrible people, but I guess when your Dad is bugnuts….

Definitely should have been put down. As in to death. They should have been killed. Probably.

Still fucking crazy. But I love Kharn, and honestly Lotara (who I know isn’t technically a World Eater but close enough.)

No but they probably should have all been just euthanized? I mean not Kharn bc I love him but also like--they are not viable. Long term? Tbh still not entirely sure what TE:BBA’s plan was here with them and Angron (I’m gonna assume something along the lines of ignore it and hope it goes away, since that is mostly his plan for everything)

Ultramarines

probably enormous squares, but tbh in a galaxy with World Eaters and the Rout, we could do with some squares.

Honestly, I have no issues with them. They do their duty, they are loyal. I hope to love them though. They actually believe in colors.

HOLY FUCK DO I LOVE THEM. ALL 200,000 OF THEM. (Which is probably what Roboute thinks tbh.) Like, I literally haven’t met a single one that I don’t adore and love with my whole soul and entire being. They are precious, soft, beautiful bbs who I adore with my whole heart. And who will make great leaders of the world someday I’m so proud. On a less gushy note, much like the Blood Angels, the Ultramarines really have a sort of profound feeling of protection and duty towards humans. They may not always like dealing with them, but Roboute is of the firm belief that they must understand what they are truly fighting for. Saving humanity is not enough, you have to fight for the humans who live there. (See, the one short story where they find a baby and I died.)

No but what you don’t quite get is that I literally love them. Every single individual solitary one of them, and while some may say “But Djem such a thing is impossible you haven’t met every Ultramarine” I need you to understand that the depth of my love for them and their Primarch is such that I know, in my bones, that I don’t need to meet them all to love them okay bc I already do.

Death Guard

Okay, so honestly I wanted to hate them (because BETRAYAL) but tbh its only the First and Second Captains who suck a lot and idk really the rest are sort of tragically precious??

Seriously, what is Mortarion’s issue?

No, seriously, what the fuck is their problem? Get the fuck over it.

Okay, I do feel bad. For Mortarian. Of all the traitors, him I understand the most. However, that being said, while I can understand his issues, I feel like giving yourself over to demons, turning into actual demons, and also turning on and killing your brothers who refused to become said demons makes you terrible awful people who really need to like, die.

Thousand Sons

okay, I fucking love these lame Warrior Monk Priest Wizards who live in a literal glass city with restaurants and teach random people Tai Chi in the park or whatever. Overall 10/10

I am v. worried that they are going to do something dumb like join the rebellion in order to affect change from the inside and then like, adopt demons or something. Pls don’t be dumb boys.

I don’t even fucking--look, I’m just tired okay?

What the fuck Azhek. No seriously, ⅞ is good enough? What the fuck is wrong with you?

Sons of Horus? Luna Wolves? who the fuck knows

my precious sons. You did not deserve what was done to you. This is why we don’t do frats. I believed in you and you failed me. D:

I love my precious sons. The Sons of Horus however, can go die.

I just--why are you the way you are?

I think the best thing about these absolute morons is that half the legion isn’t even demon fuckers, they just woke up one day and Horus told them to kill their brothers and they went “sure okay” and then just did. They are so fucking pretentious and stupid, fucking speartip, honestly die. I take it back. You all deserved exactly what you got, you dumb fucks.

Word Bearers

look, I haven’t met the rest of these dudes yet, but Erebus is a terrible fucking ambassador. -60/10 for not controlling their boy

HOLY LORD. I cannot--there are not actually words to describe how much I loathe these ignorant dumbasses. Like, seriously. Honestly, the ones who were purged were probably lucky, because the rest of them fucking suck.

God, eat a fucking landmine. Except, that would probably turn them on or something. Fucking assholes.

Just--imagine being such a fuckup that even when you were the first to the “become a demon, save the world” thing you still somehow ended up last. I hope the Ultramarines put down every. Single. One.

Salamanders

idk but this name is dumb. Salamanders are cute and slimy, and while Astartes are fucking adorable, they are not slimy. -1 for the dumb name

They are loyal, which is cool, and they seem like chill bros.

I just, like, they are sweet, but good lord are they simple.

I’m not sure? What they are doing? With their lives? Guys, idk if anyone told you but like, um. There is a war. And I get they’ve had it rough but also the loyalists could use their hope so maybe, idk. Do something? I mean I know there are like, 50 of you left and also you think your dad is dad and I feel you but like-

Raven Guard

idk but I like Ravens and Black, plus their Primarch’s name is Corvus? 11/10 they better not suck.

OMG I love Corvus?? Flies with a giant jetpack and tried to gut Lorgar? Yeah, he’s wonderful. Plus, their Captain seemed cool before he was fucking murdered.

I love them all, bless. They are sweet and simple and kind of stupid, but they make me feel things in my heart, so like, idk, stay precious.

Look, I cried over Branne fucking Nev, I don’t wanna talk about it rn

Alpha Legion

seriously? Lame.

Fuck these guys. What is their deal?

I can’t even really. I really, truly can’t. Nothing has ever satisfied me the way I was satisfied when Alpharius literally lost his head. God, that was beautiful.

Or Omegon? It was actually Omegon? I don’t even know anymore man

[suchdan-veryphil]

A Whole Ass Baby? - Jack Barakat Imagine

Anonymous said:

How about a Jack Barakat headcannon/whatever you wanna write about you two finding out that you’re gonna have a kid? I need more Jack content tbh 

Word Count: 2,367

Trigger Warnings: Swearing, getting sick, sex mention, menstruation mentioned, doctors

A/N: 

This is the second time I put something back in my drafts instead of posting it when I was done. And this is now the second time I was sad that a post wasn’t getting notes when it was never posted. I will do better. This took forever, but here it is. I love Jack Bassam Barakat. I love writing Jack Barakat. I am HERE FOR THIS

------------

It had been three weeks since I started feeling nauseous. I would just be sitting down and be hit with a sudden wave of nausea, like I was on a boat for too long. I could still eat, I could still drink, I could still shake my ass to Mr. Brightside but if I sat for too long I would just be hit with the feeling that it was time to vom. 

Then two weeks ago, I was fine. The nausea was gone, the world was bright again.

Then about two days ago, it hit me again. I couldn’t eat anything that wasn’t toast, crackers, a banana, or water (although the water was a hit or miss). Too much of anything caused me to be violently sick, and unfortunately for me, “too much” of most things meant one bite. Otherwise, I felt fine. No aches and pains, no headache, no fever. I wasn’t thinking too much about it, though, mostly for those reasons. 

Meanwhile, Jack was pounding back cake, pizza, ribs, wings, margs, and everything in between four or five times a day without a second thought. I was honestly jealous. 

We were sitting on our sofa, watching The Office. I was laying on two of the cushions and he was sitting on the third, resting his elbow on my knees. I watched as he popped three pizza rolls into his mouth at once and started chewing rather loudly. In response, I groaned and pushed his shoulder with the pad of my foot. 

“Do you have to enjoy the good food in the house when I’m sick?” 

He started to reply, but I couldn’t understand him with all of that food in his mouth. It was a low grumble, and he was starting to drool a pizza stained slobber the more he attempted to speak.

“What?! I can’t understand you,” I chuckled a little and sat up before wiping his nasty spit out of his beard. He chewed the food and quickly swallowed before answering. 

“I said, if I don’t eat it then nobody will and that’s a shame. Besides, I still think you should go to the doctor.” He popped another roll in his mouth and looked over at me. 

“I disagree. My stomach has just been off. I have literally zero other symptoms.” 

“You haven’t eaten in like a week. You need to go to the doctor.” Jack raised his eyebrows at me and stared intently. He was probably right, but I hated the doctors and he knew this. 

“If I don’t feel better by Sunday, I’ll go to the doctor. Okay? Just two days.” 

We just stared at each other, both of us begging the other to give in silently. I leaned in and did my best to pout my lip without it being obvious. 

I could tell the second that he went to inhale deeply through his nose that I had won. 

“Thank you,” I leaned over and kissed his cheek gently. 

“I didn’t even say anything!” 

“You didn’t have to.” I kissed his cheek once more, getting a whif of his greasy lunch. It hit my stomach instantly, bringing me to my feet and to the bathroom to empty whatever small contents that were left. 

That was definitely the universe giving me some sort of karma. 

I could feel his hands rubbing my back as I leaned over the toilet and waited to see if anything else was going to invite itself up. 

With a deep breath, I grabbed some toilet paper and wiped my mouth before flushing and sitting on the cold tile. 

“Do you feel better?” Jack continued to rub my back. I took a second to listen to my body, and also to get reoriented. After a moment, I nodded my head and pressed my palms against the floor to push myself off of the ground. I was only a few inches off the ground when I started to feel dizzy and fell back into Jack’s arms. I closed my eyes and put my hand up to my forehead. 

“Ok, let’s go to the doctor.” I leaned against the sink counter and collected myself before I began to brush my teeth. 

I could see Jack’s face become instantly relieved through the mirror as I spoke.

“I’ll get the keys.” 

Within the minute, we were getting into the car and buckling up. Jack reached over as we stopped at a light and pressed the back of his hand to my forehead. 

“Well you don’t have a fever.” His hands dropped to hold mine, fingers interlaced. 

“I know, that’s why I really didn’t want to go anywhere. I’ve had stomach aches before,” I sighed and rubbed circles along his hand with my thumb. 

Jack nodded and focused on driving. “I know. I know,” 

It wasn’t long before we were in the waiting room of my doctor’s office. I was busy concentrating on not getting sick in front of the other patients waiting to be seen and Jack took out his phone to play a game. 

I stared at his phone screen as he made switched pieces of candy to watch them pop. I concentrated so hard on the screen that I didn’t hear when they called my name. 

“Hey, that’s you.” Jack locked his phone and elbowed my arm as I came to. 

“Oh. Oh, I’m coming. Sorry.” I turned and handed Jack my bag. “Can you hold this?” He just nodded and slung it over his shoulder casually and continued to scroll through his phone.  

I followed the RN into the examination room and sat on the chair with the noisy white paper on it. “So, Y/N, what brings you in today?” 

I sighed and sat back on the chair, making the paper rustle. “Well, I haven’t been feeling well for the last couple of weeks. I have bad nausea, I can’t keep anything down. Today, my boyfriend was eating a pizza roll and just the smell made me sick. I got really light headed in the bathroom after getting sick. I don’t have a fever or anything, but Jack, my partner, is set on me getting seen so... here we are.” 

I let out a breath and watched as the nurse processed everything. “Are you on any medication? Any change in your diet or exercise routine?” 

“Nope, I’m still not on anything and I still don’t diet or exercise.” We both chuckled at my little joke before she nodded and started to take my temp and my blood pressure. 

“Sexually active?” She asked, releasing the air from my arm band. 

I nodded my head and watched as she removed the band. “Yes indeed.” 

“Do you use contraceptives?” 

“We do.” 

“When was your last menstrual cycle?” 

“Um,” I paused and thought back to when the last time I got my period was. I couldn’t remember, which was probably not the best sign. 

“I’d like to give you a pregnancy test to rule it out before the doctor goes and prescribes you something, if that’s alright.” She opened a cabinet and began to reach for whatever she was grabbing as I answered. 

“Yea, that’s fine.” I could feel my palms begin to get sweaty as I thought of the possibility that I was pregnant. Me? A mom? I couldn’t imagine it. I slept until almost noon most days and ate mac and cheese for most meals. There was no way I could be a mom. 

Jack as a dad, though, that was something I could see. He was always ready to take care of others and make someone laugh. Jack was someone who had a lot of patience, was goal-driven, and just made everyone happy. I tried to imagine what it would be like if he had a tiny baby to love and care for, but I was pulled back by the nurse who handed me a cup. 

“Here you go, just pee in this and leave it on the shelf over the sink with your birthday written on it. You can come back in here when you’re done and we’ll let you know what we get and take it from there.” 

I took the small plastic container in my hands and sighed as I looked at it. Getting up from the seat, I couldn’t help but notice my cheeks started to hurt. I could not stop smiling, just imagining that Jack and I could possibly be having a baby. 

Once I reached the bathroom, I followed the nurse’s instructions step-by-step and washed my hands thoroughly. All I could think was “I should have drank more water today” and “Jack and I might be parents”. 

Sitting back on the seat, I bit my lip and rested my head back in the headrest. Jack had no idea what was going on in this room. He was just sitting in the waiting room with my purse over his shoulder, playing Candy Crush or scrolling through TikTok. 

I could feel another wave of nausea hit and I silently prayed to whatever higher power would listen that I would not throw up in this office. All of my energy went into holding in whatever it was that was threatening its way up. To my demise, I was quickly pulled to my feet and hunched over a garbage can to hurl. Between heaves, I heard the door open and close before being met with the voice of my nurse. 

“Well, I think we know why you’re getting so sick.” The water turned on and I soon saw a cup of water in my line of vision along with a tissue. I took both gratefully once I knew I was done before wiping my mouth and drinking the water. I threw the cup and tissue in the trash before sitting and apologizing. 

“I can take that out with me, I’m so sorry. Thank you.” I was rambling at this point, feeling just embarrassed that she had walked in on that. 

“Don’t worry about that. Grosser things have happened here, trust me. We’ll get it taken out once you leave. Now, I have news that could be either really good or really bad depending on how you take it but know that there are options from here.” 

Somehow, this only confused me so I just nodded in hopes that she would get to it. 

“You’re pregnant. This would explain the sickness, the lack of appetite, the lack of fever, and the lack of a period.” 

My heart started to race and I could hear it pumping in my ears. “Wow.” 

It was all I could muster before I looked at her and smiled a little. “Can... can we go get Jack?” 

“Of course! I’ll go get him, I just didn’t want to tell you in front of him just in case.” She smiled back at me and left the room for a minute before returning with Jack, who was still holding my purse over his shoulder. I couldn’t help but chuckle as I saw him looking so non-chalant with it. 

“Hey you. Is everything okay?” He reached out his hand to grab mine before squeezing gently and looking at the nurse and then back at me. 

“Yea, everything’s fine.” I smiled widely at him and bit my lip before looking at the nurse. 

“Well we figured out why Y/N has been getting so sick.” The nurse started before she looked at me. I nodded and held back my tears as she continued. “She’s pregnant.” 

Jack was silent for a second before he looked down at me. “Wait. What?” He smiled widely and dropped my bag to the ground before taking my other hand and squeezing them tightly. 

All I could do was nod. 

“A baby?” He asked and tilted his head, much like a dog would when confused. 

I chuckled and nodded my head. “A baby, Jack.” 

I was barely finished with my sentence before he leaned down and wrapped me up in his arms tightly. 

“Oh my god. A whole ass baby. A kid. A child.” he rubbed my back over a few times before leaning back and holding my face in his hands. 

“So you’re happy?” I asked and smiled widely, reflecting his. Jack let out a quick, “ha” before leaning in and kissing me deeply. 

Once we separated, he bit his lower lip and glanced down at my stomach. “How far along are you?” 

I shrugged, and the nurse chimed in momentarily. “By the looks of your period chart, it would look like you’re about 7 weeks along. I’ll give you guys a few minutes, but when you’re ready you can go to the front and make an appointment with us for within the next few weeks and we can follow up.” 

“Thank you.” was all Jack or I could muster as she excused herself. He looked down at me and dropped his jaw. 

“A whole baby!” 

I laughed and nodded. “Yes! A whole ass baby! Growing in here!” I poked my stomach and chuckled before I bit my lower lip to contain the smile. 

“So you bothered me and pestered me about condom usage and we ended up getting knocked up anyways.” Jack commented. I gently and playfully pushed his shoulder and shook my head. 

“Oh shut up, Barakat. Looks like that wine room is getting turned into a nursery.” 

“Says you. I was thinking your office would be comfier.” 

I laughed a little and shook my head. “Yes, because we need a wine clubhouse AND a wine closet. Sorry, how dare I?” 

With a smile, Jack helped me up to my feet and held my hand. With his free hand, he picked up my bag and handed it to me. 

“I’m carrying a child and you want me to carry my bag too?” I teased as I reached for it. Quickly, he pulled it back and slung it over his shoulder again. 

“Fine, I look better with it anyways. It’s definitely not your color,” he said and lead the way to the front reception area. 

The way my heart swelled with love and joy told me that I was on a very eventful and joyous journey with my boyfriend and our growing family. 

[lnc2]

ignore this i just needed to put some feelings in writing. if you choose to read please note the triggers in the tags are regarding people in the news and ideation so don’t worry about me please and thank you

first of all i need to preface this by saying this is not a cry for help i have help i go to therapy i’m on meds and have a support system i am just processing and venting so please do not worry bc that’s not what this is about

okay

so i’ve been sick for like 13 months at this point and 7 of those months has had me in a pretty bad state. it wasn’t even until april that i was clearheaded enough to read a little and even that was only because i had an iron infusion and even that improvement while great was not Drastic. i could converse better, think a little more clearly, and even read for a while. my exhaustion was better and i could ever go out for a little while. as i’ve gotten farther away from the iron infusion i’ve slowly started deteriorating again with the worst seeming to come back full force this week- shaking, heart racing, nausea, brain fog, dizziness, confusion,inability to concentrate, body aches, insomnia, etc.

i had a full breakdown in the grocery store when i realized i couldn’t read or remember or focus on what i was supposed to be buying which triggered a panic attack. i knew i was bad but i didn’t know i was this bad again because like i said i’m not really going out or even testing my limits at home so i’m not confronted with my inability to do anything in such a noticeable way.

anyways i was talking to my therapist and i was trying to explain how i’m not suicidal but i’ve just noticed the return of suicidal ideation especially as i start to slip into being Worse again and i feel a little hopeless and like i’m never going to get better or even be a person again and how i’m dependent on my parents for everything rn because covid literally took away my ability to take care of myself. and i’m not going to go into all of the feelings of inadequacy and guilt that triggers because frankly i can’t handle that rn and i’m tired and i don’t have therapy next week and i’m not about to poke the bear.

fast forward to like a couple hours ago and i get a notification that a  screenwriter just completed suicide after 13 months of battling long haul covid and just- it was like a gut punch. hit v close to home and then i fell down the google rabbit hole of other long haulers who did the same and idek how to describe what i’m feeling. despair, sadness, even a little jealousy. which i know is fucked up but that’s where my head is at some days.

and it’s like, a few days ago i was talking to my therapist about how i didn’t even feel like i could guilt-free think about not having to deal because i know how devastating that would be for my parents and i’ve already put them through so much the last four years.  and then there’s also the fact that i’m fueled by an unhealthy amount of spite because fuck everything if i didn’t hurt myself after losing rory and being drugged and then being drugged again i’ll be damned if i let covid take me down. but just some days i really get in my head about how i feel like i can’t catch a break or this will never pass or even just the thought that okay so say i do get better what’s the next disaster that’s going to hit?

idk i’m just really feeling Down this week especially because my body is also feeling worse than i have in a couple months and it’s just getting to me. i just wish that even if my body wasn’t working i still had my mind to fall back on but the fucked up thing about covid is it fucks with your brain function too. and seeing that article just hit hard because i was already dealing with those feelings and had just brought it up to my therapist so it was just a really weird, incredibly sad synchronicity that i haven’t stopped thinking about.

anyways i just needed to put this down somewhere. i’m okay i’m just tired and sad. tired of being sick and sad that people have to deal with this and that there are people dealing with this who lost all hope. i don’t know them but i feel like i know them.

[towerofgodscreamblogwink]

reading last chap of s2 after covering several chapters yesterday, also since it's end of the season, for once I put some bigger serious thoughts at the end

who the FUCK ARE YOU PEOPLE???

OH MY GOD KARAKA IS TSUNDERE

there are OTHER slayers?? (except fucking ex white)  if they mentioned it earlier i must’ve forgot

that’s not how to talk to your daddy greatest

 -(no i don’t like jahad i’m here to bully karaka because i tend to bully my faves)

*punches table* rabbit boy. get out. i have not sighed so loud in my entire life

oh i see why people were calling them furries.

listen, you either give us catboys or leave.

please don’t say “creatures” if it’s like your furry way of talking

that guy: not to worry he has a permit

gustang: *pulls out paper* “i can get whatever i want”

i’ve read “gremlin” im dONE

you know what maybe i should just go to bed rn

also cat is destroying my door dear lord

ok so it’s the next day now

“ahahaha”

“I can’t read...”

SHIT I HAVEN’T NOTICED RACHEL GOT TELEPORTED

erh i’m dumb on this one, why have they made this parallels?

I don’t want to tell you this but he just reminded me of chara undertale...

wangan: onii-chan!?

wait what

ouch

soooo karaka believes wangan’s story even w/o ring then?

*spits tea* ow goddammit not the feels

anyhoo that’s the end of s2, siu put a note about break but yeah that was years ago, so pretty sure i’ll be starting s3 even now but i won’t be posting it rn

anyhoo well that was suprisingly long season? my usual knowledge of “Seasons” is usually from anime, and these tend to have seasons with usual 2 or 3 arcs but they usually don’t go in so many different directions 

personally it feels like half of season 2 is a season on it’s own tbh, and maybe that’s how anime could adapt it, perhaps? although 12 episodes would work best with just setting on saving bam from fug.. either anime would make the seasons in parts like aot did with s3 or have lots and lots of seasons, since probability of anime getting 24 episodes has gotten awfully small those years

As for the opinions on season 2... I see first half and season on it’s own, so let’s start from this - Bam getting rescued, and first time they enter hell train. First of all, Bam as Viole is absolutely nailing this, and I wouldn’t mind having Viole as protagonist to be honest, although it would be indeed sad as Viole is not the happiest person, but damn is he a cutie. Is he a baby. 

Wangan - oh dear I dunno if others saw the plot twist coming, but I did not - I have absolutely been viewing him as Bam’s counterpart to his Viole side, just a complete shounen protagonist who’s completely ordinary. Boy was I w ro n g. I only remember vaguely being sus about him when Viole has mentioned his ring, but that was about it, as it was never mentioned again, I forgot about it. And then it appeared Karaka has this ring. Boy was I shooketh.

I don’t think I exactly liked the further progression though until Wangan’s story was revealed - until then he kinda fell into background, and then soon again as said story was revealed. However I do know Siu has big plans with him, and at this point I know Siu’s writing enough, so I don’t have much worries about his further progression

Also sadly there was no Karaka-Wangan brother bonding

Next in mind I have Khun, naturally, as he’s my icy hot favourite. I don’t really know why even, when I saw him in anime I was quite indifferent about him. So if you want me to explain why do I like khun, I can’t really explain. Other than when he was becoming my favourite, I remember being dissappointed in myself and making a post to myself “Goddammit don’t fall for him just because he’s your type” and he’s not even really my type in terms of personality, but at that point I was jsut shrugging it off, maybe it was his childish over-dramatic posture contrasting his cold personality because I just hit that protect button

Also yes I may be basic just slap me already

And before I’ll start talking: girl’s scout outfit, really? I support my son and I can understand his edgy and k-pop fashion... But I’d be lying if I said I understood him for shit at that moment

So now that we’re past back... I was actually recently re-reading first chapters, and damn, the difference of Khun before Bam was rescued - was rather intriguing. He was laughing his ass off at silly things (his team being dressed silly) but oh sweetie did it feel weird.

Next, I keep thinking about him on the train obliberating Rachel - despite popular opinion, his cockiness was actually getting on my nerves, and only thing saving it, was his reasons were Bam - so in other words, at least he wasn’t an asshat for his own sake.

I much liked his personality during second half of the season 2 - as much as there wasn’t much khunbam content - seems like Khun has grown as a person,as his cocky aura much disappeared as he became more understanding towards his own weaknesses. Now his “cockiness” became rather entertaining if you catch my drift, because despite his jerk nature, he *is* well aware of his flaws, and I just like that. Not that he *wasn’t* considerate of that already, but the hidden floor really did wonders on him.

And dear my, his relationship with Bam. I’ll be honest, at some point during reading first half of season 2, I felt like I was reading romance story between him and Bam. It was all the little things, like playing with Rachel just to know Bam’s past, Khun noticing Bam was uncomfortable with Viole wig, Khun being near Bam as he spoke he has no reasons to live, Khun standing up for Bam when strangers tried to use him and Isu asked for his help but skipped the asking part, Khun looking back to Bam telling him he’ll be back when going to catch the fish on train, Khun trying to talk to him when Bam locked himself up in his room on train, constantly checking and finally waiting in his room when he notices Bam is gone, Khun noticing lack of Bam’s presence before going to floor of death right *after* he just said he feels like world is ending if Bam isn’t here, and then beeming when Bam does in fact appears. And that’s just all the stuff I can remember right now, and I mean the *little* things. The big things are the ones we know well - “So that I can always chase” and the famous world one I don’t have to quote.

Second half didn’t have much scenes, but there were few that did stuck to me - Bam’s line to Kiseia how he understands why she hates him, but he’ll do everything he can to stop her if she plans to harm Khun *again*. Because it seemed like Bam kind of moved on from Khun getting stabbed by his sis, but that panel did show that not only it *did* stay with him, it also stayed with him that it was *Kiseia* who hurt him.

Another scene was the one I don’t think I need to talk about much, as we all pretty understand - moment of Khun and Eduan awkward father-son bonding. Khun tries to close himself off, but Bam reaches out, and forces him out of comfort zone

But what mostly stuck out to me, was his behaviour after Khun became kinda dead. It was the way he spoke to endorsi and rest, how *he’s* going to take khun and follow the *harder* path, and anyone who *don’t want to come*, can take the easier one. Basically, he was prepared to go the harder route completely alone because it meant taking Khun with him, and he was just, prepared to go without any help, he only optionally added that others can join if they *want* to.

Another interesting scene, was Hwaryun calling him out, when few of his teammates has been captured, due to them taking the different path from Bam - but if they are meant to escape with Khun, they have to leave them, and when Bam gets steamy about it, Hwaryun goes - “I didn’t choose the teams. You’ve chosen them based on who matters more.” It’s so subtle, so cruel, yet intriguing - one of the most worst way to tell someone he cares for someone else more - she’s only saying Khun mattered to him more, but in this context, it sounds accusing, making Bam’s decision selfish. And that’s something that’s absolutely in my mind - his care for Khun, called out in “accusing” matter - as something that stopped him from commiting other decision - as something he’s willing to priotize others over.

So I can’t stop thinking about that, and truthfully? That last “take care of Khun after me.” line.

But the other line from bam’s monolouge that gets me is “Wait a bit more Khun... I’ll wake you up again.” That “again” gets to me, but I can’t really explain it. Maybe it’s the way he looks at Khun longily. 

So this covers their relationship, and I think I’m only gonna mention Bam now real quick and perhaps Eudan and Jahad, because the post’s getting long and I don’t want to make *this* post specifically long.

I don’t have much to say about Bam, as Bam himself doesn’t have much to say about him. He didn’t have much definying features or characteristics besides the time he was Viole, but you have to hand it to him for growing after meeting after she pushed him for the first time - it was still hard to say anything about him though. For several chapters later - as well, except he did manage to develop the traits of self-sacriface, and actual resolve to save everyone - because he talks about *always* and sure fights for his friends, but who doesn’t? Where his personality shines in this regard, is in the moment of Bam saving his enemies with no questions asked, and White by the way definetely helped Bam to develop his personality for sure.

But either way I’m here roasting Bam, while my goal was to say, that it was in the hidden floor where I’ve actually started recognizing him as his own character - it was in the moment of him having final confrontation with Viole, I finally saw what kind of person he was. And I liked it, he became a solid character in that moment, accompanied by proper flashbacks and exploration. And Bam continues to be then written quite consinstely as in one of later flashbacks, he indeed says, what he said to Viole a while ago - he’s afraid of being alone. Not only that, the internal conflict was added - is he a monster? is he not? It’s simple conflict but can do wonders, and it’s not something that Bam even thinks about, it’s more of a really subtle conflict within a character design itself, rather than Bam.

So basically now Bam indeed feels more of an actual character

And before I’ll end it for now, I want to mention the meeting of young Eudan, andyoung Jahad - truth to be told, I don’t have most unique feelings towards them as anyone sees the point - the adventures with pure intentions turned evil, aka how everyone can turn evil. What makes me more interested, is how Siu has used it for storytelling... Main characters having a big meeting with the younger versions of villians? Haven’t seen that one yet, so I’m interested what direction Siu will take with it, since this is my first time seeing it, so I’m really curious how exactly you can utilize such scenes in terms of long planned story, and not only how they affect story as a whole, but how they also affect just aspects of it as well.

So, that’d be it on my commentary and small “opinion” on season 2. It wasn’t like I exactly wanted  to put it here, but I wanted the end of season 2 to have more meaning to myself. But not only to have a meaning to myself *just* for my own reasons, but because I didn’t want to leave the whole season with nothing but small comments there and there. I wanted my experience altogether to be something bigger - but not only experience, but my “legacy” as well. So, that’d be about it x2, if you’re still reading, congratulations, I appreciate that, and you get an apple

[liliesoftherain]

Hello 👋🏾 can you do a scenario or hc for aizawa with prompt 4 “look at me-just breath, okay?”, where the reader is a very closed off introvert who is a teacher at UA as well and is known as the “reserved teacher” because she hides her emotions very well, but something sad in her life effects her personally, and Aizawa notices her off behavior and when he tries to comfort her she pushes him away, but somehow he breaks down her barriers. This is really long, sorry 🥺 It’s sad hours for me rn..

A/N: I have other things to work on but when I saw this and seen that you said you were feeling down, I worked on it because I get it. I hope you’re feeling okay, and if you EVER need to talk to me you can always message me. That goes for anyone! 

Title: Let it ot

Pairing: Shouta Aizawa x Reader

4.  “Look at me-just breath, okay?”

You loved your job

Or well

Jobs

You really did

And a lot of people understood the importance of teaching the next generation of heroes

So your agency made sure to be as accommodating as they could be

When it came down to both teaching and pro hero work

But just because they tried doesn’t mean they did it well

It was still super stressful no matter how much you loved it

Plus it was really hard for you to say no sometimes

Being extremely introverted you hated confrontation

Almost to the point where you’d do anything to avoid it

So when your agency asked if you could pick up some slack

Pick up a few extra hours

Or if you could do some extra paperwork

You didn’t say no

You just did it.

And boy,

Was wearing you down

Trying to balance all the curve balls life was throwing at you 

What else was there to do besides deal with it?

So you took everything with as much grace you could muster

Hiding everything behind your always small smile

So no one could tell what was going on

But you were a fool to think you could hide for long

You had only been dating Shouta for a little over a month

But it seemed he knew you like the back of his hand already

It was one day in particular 

Where you were having trouble hiding your feelings when he confronted you

You had been in the teachers lounge alone

Nursing a headache and almost on the verge of tears when he walked in

You hid it with a smile and greeted him like usual

He just stared at you

Your grin never faltered but he knew something was wrong

“How are you.”

Shouta may have been a blunt man

But he cared about your feelings 

Well enough to know he should approach you carefully

“I’m fine, students are as great as always. How was your class?”

He knew you were lying, but he humored you for a while

Letting yourself become distracted by talk of his students

And talk of your own

While it was refreshing for a while

You started to go back to how you were originally feeling

Aizawa took note of the way your eyes dimmed for a moment

The way your smile wavered and your demeanor saddened

He couldn’t take it anymore

“What’s been going on.”

“What do you mean?”

“You haven’t been yourself.”

You were taken aback

Not realizing that anyone could tell

“I don’t..”

You didn’t really know what to say

“You can talk to me you know.”

“I’m fine, really Shouta.”

“Are you?”

You were panicking now

Would he think you were annoying?

You were probably upset and stressed over nothing

There was no reason to make it a big deal

There was no reason to get him involved in something so insignificant

“I.. It’s really nothing to worry about. Thank you though.”

You saw him frown and you felt your internal panic skyrocket

You didn’t want to upset him!

That was the whole reason you didn’t want to share your stupid feelings

“You don’t have to put up a face around me.”

He sighed and you rubbed your arm

Your breath picking up as you felt your eyes sting

‘Oh God, not here. Not now!’

He saw how you began to fidget and he felt a small pang in his heart

“Come here.”

He pulled you into his chest

You stilled momentarily and wanted to push away 

But he was so warm

So comforting

You held onto the front of his shirt and began to cry

You really didn’t know why you were crying

But it felt nice to let it out

Shouta held you there for a while

Letting your tears dampen his shirt while he soothingly ran his hands in your hair

Until your breathing was hitching due to your sobs

To the point where you were gasping for air

He shushed you and let his fingers pull away from your hair to find your chin

Making your face look up at him

“Look at me-just breath, okay?”

You tried to do as he said 

Taking large and shuttering breathes through your lips

He breathes with you to help you

After a while you calm to hushed hiccups and red eyes

“You don’t need to pretend around me.”

“I just don’t want to burden you..”

“Burden me? You couldn’t. This is what I’m here for, to offer you support when you need it. Okay?”

“but..”

He playful glared at you

“No buts. Even if you don’t want to talk, if you just need to let it out. I’m here for you. Always.”

You sniffled, smiling a real smile

“Thank you Shouta.”

He gave you a kiss to the head before standing

“Why don’t we have a date after school, hm. Before we go into work.”

“A date?”

“Yea, I need a good nap with you.”

Lets just say, that was the best nap you ever had

No worries, no stress, no sadness

Just cuddled up to the man of your dreams

[a-lonely-tatertot]

Finding Home

A/N: HIIIIIII IM BACK BOIS! Anyways this is a shorter chapter I didn’t wanna mess with outline so you get tiny chapter. sooo woot woot for like barely 2k words? But like the doc im writing this on is at like 19k and 29 pages i am in shock. trying to get back a consistent updating with this so uh yeah dont keep your hopes up tho- working on ch. 7 rn hope you enjoy! As always betaed by the glorious @bookwyrminspiration

words: 2208

tw: none

wattpad ao3

Chapter 6: These Secrets Stain Us Red

They had gotten off the bus at the last stop before Kull, stepping out into the cold air. Sophie glanced at the trees in the distance turning orange and yellow. Distantly, she remembered when she was younger this was her favorite season, how the leaves would fall and crunch at her feet, and how it was actually somewhat bearable to be outside. She smiled at the memory as she held Linh’s hand, walking quickly to the gas station, her stomach already grumbling.

“Linh?” a voice called from behind them as they stood in line. Linh swung around, trying to find the source of who called her, nearly startling Sophie into almost dropping her water. The mystery person stepped out from behind a small cluster of people with an overly energetic wave. “Linh! It is you!” he called.

Sophie watched as Linh’s eyes landed on the man and her whole expression shifted. As opposed to the man’s own happiness, Linh seemed to put a wall between her real emotions and the rest of the world, her face betraying nothing. “Hey, Sameul!” Linh said in pretend excitement; Sophie knew that her words carried an undertone of malice.

This Sameul was not the man Sophie had seen in the memories, but from Linh’s reaction, he seemed to probably be involved in whatever Linh was in.

“That’s me,” Sameul responded, clearly not getting Linh’s annoyance like Sophie was. “Geez, it’s been what, how many months since I last saw you?”

“Yeah it’s been a while,” Linh said, her shoulders rigid and her jaw set. Who the heck is this guy? she thought. Their name was called and Sameul followed them to go pick up their food. Sophie tried not to feel trapped with the way Linh’s eyes darted.

Sameul smiled ruefully, “Last time I saw you you had a little backpack and were running out the door in the middle of the night.” Linh took in a sharp breath and stuttering to a halt, her tray of food almost dropping. Sophie raised her eyebrows, more confused than ever. There was a beat then a sharp ring interrupted the weighted silence and Linh’s eyes widened with relief.

“Oh Sam, I’m sorry, that’s her sister calling. She’s really gotta take that. Why don’t you come with me?” Linh asked, more of a command than a suggestion. Reluctantly, Sophie pressed accept on her phone, ready to unleash the crazy whirlwind of shit that she had found out on one completely unprepared Amy. “What up checking in blame Tina she was worried,” Amy said, boredom concealing her concern.

“Uhuh sure Tina was worried,” Sophie chuckled. “Anyways, Linh is being super suspicious.”

Amy made a startled noise, “O-okay then so not well.” 

Sophie nodded even though Amy couldn’t see her, “Yup, also uh side note, totally did not watch another one of her memories.” “Sophie! It’s like you’re trying to do it on purpose!”

“It was an accident I swear!”

“Mhm, yeah, definitely.”

Sophie grumbled, “Oh screw off. Anyway, I was in this bathroom and her knuckles were all bloody like she had punched something. And then this guy came in and said that she wasn’t allowed to be reckless anymore, but from what I saw it was like she was living with some other runaway people I guess?”

Amy was silent for a moment. “Well damn.”

“Yeah,” Sophie agreed. “You shoulda seen her when this guy recognized her while we were getting food; she got like scary tense and for a moment I thought she was gonna water power him.” “Water power him? Really? That’s what you’re calling it?” Amy said. Sophie could practically hear her raising her eyebrow. “At that point just call it water bending.”

“I refuse to call it that.”

“How dare you; you’ve disrespected our childhood.” Sophie laughed. “But seriously,” Amy continued, and she knew she wasn’t going to like what she was going to say next, “Soph, what happened to telling her about the memories? Instead, you just spied more.” “She’s the one with the sketchy past!”

“That you don’t have any right to!”

“She’s been weird and I need to figure out why. Once I do I’ll tell her everything.”

“No, you don’t need to figure it out yourself! You need to talk to her and she will tell you if she’s ready to.” “Don’t tell me what to do Amy. She lied to me. The first night we were together we talked about how we got here and she lied to me like it never happened.”

“This isn’t war Sophie. Just because you’re scared, just because she lied doesn’t mean you get to invade her privacy. She’s not the enemy Sophie, she’s your girlfriend.”

Sophie hung up and her phone buzzed twice more while she watched Linh walk back over to her. This wasn’t Amy’s problem, this wasn’t Amy’s life, so screw her for trying to tell her what to do. She had the abilities and she was sure as hell going to use them. “Sam left,” Linh said with a clearly fake smile. “Said he should probably get back on the bus and didn’t want to intrude.”

At that Sophie raised an eyebrow, she didn’t need to use her telepathy to know it was a lie.

Stepping on the bus felt like placing the weight of the world on her shoulders. She knew that man was something to Linh, or Linh was something to him; maybe he was what Linh was running from. She didn’t have regrets when she reached carefully out to Sameul’s mind and glanced at what he said to Linh. Maybe she should’ve regretted it, but she couldn’t bring herself to. She needed to know, when she had left the Lost Cities it was her way of saying “I will not be lied to even if it seems better that way”. So much had been kept from her and here she was, getting things from the source instead of waiting for someone to tell her.

The words, “You haven’t changed Linh,” rang in her ears as she pulled back, not letting any emotions show on her face as Linh followed behind her. Linh didn’t say anything so Sophie didn’t say anything and they settled into a tense silence as the bus around them buzzed with noise. Sophie tried to think of something to say as the words played on repeat in her head but Linh beat her to it.

“You never told me much about Mari, about what she means to you,” Linh said. Each word seemed rehearsed as if she had said it in her head a thousand times before speaking the words into existence. “I didn’t know you cared,” Sophie responded quickly before she could think it through.

“Tell me about Mari?” Linh asked softly.

Despite what Sophie was hiding from Linh and what Linh was hiding from her, she couldn’t stop herself from talking. The words may have meant nothing as she rambled on about her life there, only meant to be a distraction, but she let them spill from her lips without hesitation. She talked of Tommy, Angie, and Mari, of her weekly game nights, of the regulars at the diner. The people she had come to love yet when the time came she didn’t hesitate to leave ‘cause she was scared. Scared of the permanence of it, scared she’d lose herself in the dream of it. And how when she burned those bridges all she felt was a gaping hole in herself. As she talked she thought of the people she had left in the Lost Cities; how she burned it all like she had when she was young and reckless and angry burning her mark, the moonlark, into the ground desperate to prove something, desperate to mean something. But now she was afraid of that, tearing everything to shreds, burning it to ashes because she didn’t know how to mean something to someone. She thought of what Amy had said and briefly wondered if she would ever be able to just talk about something instead of treating everything as a mystery she was destined to solve. Eventually, her words lulled Linh to sleep and she let out a soft sigh of contentment as she laid her head on Sophie’s shoulder. Sophie glanced at Linh, only allowing herself a quick look at her girlfriend’s soft and relaxed face before staring out the window watching the gravel pass, not allowing herself time for her guilt and sadness to rise. She wasn’t allowed those feelings. With every fiber of herself Sophie dreaded and couldn’t wait for the moment they stepped off of the bus into Kull, the town with as weird of a name as people.

An hour later, as the sun started to fall behind the trees and the sky began to turn dark, that moment came and Sophie found her entire body filled with anxiety. They made their way to the front, Sophie in front of Linh, her hand stretched behind her holding Linh’s hand like a lifeline.

They were the only ones getting off and within seconds they were left standing on the dirt road, the bus was long gone. The air was cold, and the wind blew lightly, tossing around Sophie’s ponytail. Neither spoke to the other, standing in silence, staring at the buildings in front of them. It felt like they’d break a spell if they moved, if they talked, so Sophie didn’t. But Linh did (a spell didn’t need to last an eternity in her mind, just for the moment that it was intended for). Linh squeezed Sophie’s hand three times, dragging her out of her haze to stare at Linh confused.

“It’s a human thing,” Linh said sheepishly. Distantly Sophie remembered Amy teaching her, three squeezes, “I love you”. Four squeezes back and Sophie had said, “I love you too.” She didn’t have time to think if it was a lie because with that she started walking, entirely on autopilot, the familiar route to Mari’s house ingrained in her mind. It was after hours, so there’d be no point going to the diner. So she dragged Linh down main street, taking a left about halfway down, and then it was another block til she found herself outside the door on the white porch of the bright mobile home with her whole body buzzing. It was almost too much to be there; staring at it again it was like nothing had changed. But something had, because she didn’t have a key, and so she knocked with all of the impulsive courage she had left.

Three rapid knocks.

One. Two. Three. Four. Five seconds.

The door opened with a creak.

It wasn’t Mari.

There was a man, about her height, hair pulled in a bun and silver bangs over glasses. He was familiar, why was he familiar? Linh drew in a harsh breath of air and squeezed Sophie’s hand as tight as she could. That was when the puzzle pieces fell into place. That’s when it all made sense. The man standing in front of her was someone she hadn’t seen in two years other than in the memories she had unrightfully stolen from him. The man standing in front of her, still with his signature silver, was Tam Song.

Amy’s phone buzzed next to her, pulling her away from rereading her homework question for the eight time. Ever since Sophie’s call and her following silence Amy couldn’t focus; she tried to distract herself, and pulled herself away from texting Linh and telling her everything Sophie had told her. It’s not my place, she would think. It’s not part of the plan. Her phone unlocked and she slowly processed the photo and message. It was a picture of Sophie leaning her back against the gas station with her hand holding her phone to her ear. It was just like her co-conspirators to be that dramatic they had to send a photo too.

-Operation Collect the Dumbasses-

Braincell Holder: You know we heard that call. Pure of Heart Dumb of Ass: I thought we said that I would start this conversation? No Thoughts Head Empty: Yeah well you took too long. Braincell Holder: Not the Point. The Mental Stability: And the Point? This felt too pointed, Amy thought. Way too pointed and directed at her. Her phone buzzed again. Braincell Holder: Having second thoughts? Only slightly, Amy thought, but no no this needed to happen. The Mental Stability: No Pure of Heart Dumb of Ass: Thank the fucking ancients we can move on No Thoughts Head Empty: We’ve got a Phase 3 to begin

Phase 3, which they already had planned, would be the hardest to set up. Everything had to be just the right timing and just the right place.

Incoming call from Braincell Holder

Amy smiled as she accepted the call and long red hair popped into the frame. “Where is she?” Amy asked.

The redhead grinned, “She’ll be here in a minute, you know how Mrs. Sparkly Justice is; she’s got meetings but she said she’s got a friend who wants to help.”

Amy smiled, their little band of conspirators and their plan was working better than she could’ve imagined.

“So,” Amy said, “Where do we start?”

[oikawasbread]

hello!! omg :( may i get 10 + akaashi for the promptlist?? hopefully something with fluff, i don't think i can take angst at all rn HAHA

“I need you to tell me that I’m a good person.’’

-

I RECOMMEND THIS SONG only if u want to, ofc

AKAASHI KEIJI x READER - PERSPECTIVE [angst - fluff]

 I am sorry bb!!! i couldn’t help to add some angsty parts; but dw everything ends on a fluffy note <3 

letsgooo

         You’ve been raised like this.

“ You’re not going to become anything with that attitude.” “ Your personality is going to get you nowhere.” “ Why are you even so rude, you know we are right. “

         So you started to actually believe it. You were a bad person. You were mean, rude, you “didn’t care” about anything. It looked like you were also selfish. But those things didn’t surprise you anymore; of course it hurt; but it was nothing new. You are saying your opinion? “Stop being like this.” You are not allowing someone to do something to you? “Mean.” You dare to stand up for yourself? “Quit the attitude”.

        “Your friends have noticed your anger issues, your mood swings; but apparently you didn’t need help, you needed to be told the truth : that you should not be so rude and scary”

You were waiting for some new insults, new reproaches.

 almost ready to give up.

        “What college are you going to apply after high school?”       “I don’t really know.. dad. I was thinking about a medical college. You know, since I’m pretty good at c-“       “Since you’re pretty good? Do you think ‘pretty good’ is enough?”       “Dad, I am good at chemistry and biology; of course there’s kids out there way better than me. But I still have 2 years to improve.”       “Yeah, this is what you’ve been saying since last year. And here you are, still being ‘pretty good’ and not ‘the best’.”       “Honestly, yes Y/n. You’re never doing anything. You’re never helping me around the house, you haven’t opened a book since this holiday started, and you wanna get better? How are you planning on doing that?”       “What does that even mean? I’ve been buried in papers, school work and books for the final exam all this month. I am on 2nd place in class and I’ve been helping you with everything you asked me.”       “Shut it, we’re eating right now. Stop with this discussion.”       “I’m not the one who started it.” This was enough. To shut it? They are the ones who started talking about this whole topic.       “See, y/n? Even you admitted it. You’re on 2nd place, so that means you’re not the best.”       “Can YOU do what I’m doing? Learn all this new information while having zoom classes, helping around the house and taking care of the dog. Because by the way, I’m the one who-“

-

your ears were burning after your dad’s hand made contact with the left half of your face.

      you couldn’t even see clearly because of the tears;the heartache started to become physical pain; you could literally feel your heart breaking. “See? This attitude of yours will stop you from doing anything and you’ll only get to lose because of it. You could’ve chose to be a good daughter and shut up instead of questioning me and your mother.”

this was clearly the drop that filled the glass

-

      You ran upstairs and locked yourself in your room. The worst time to cry is when you have to hide it. You were shoving your head into the pillow, trying to stop your screams of frustration. When was this going to end? Why you? You tried your best but it still wasn’t enough; you did everything everyone wanted but you still weren’t a good person. Were they considering themselves good people? Your parents, your friends, your classmates. It was all about perspective; wasn’t it?

      Or probably not. Maybe you actually were a bad person who was trying to convince herself that it isn’t true, since you were the only one who had this point of view.

       You had to see someone, you needed to. But from the endless contact list you had, there was no one who could tell you what you needed to hear.

Until you saw his name : Akaashi Keiji. 

The quiet boy who was sitting behind you at school, the one who never talked to you but somehow you had his number; probably from the class gc. You weren’t sure if he had yours saved. But that was the whole point; you never spoke to each other, so he didn’t knew you. Maybe if he sees you in this situation and hears the whole thing, he will tell you what you needed to hear, he will reassure you. Even if it was because you pitied him and he wanted to get rid of you faster, it didn’t matter.

So you pressed “call”.

-

-

-

      “Hello?”

      “Hi.. I’m sorry to bother you. I just..”

¬ you just what? are you going to tell him : “Hi Akaashi, I have serious issues at home, can we talk about it even though all you know about me is my name?” or maybe “Hey Akaashi, can we meet ? I promise I’m not a serial killer.”

      “You just what… Y/n?” you snapped       “Oh.. you have my number?”       “Well, yeah.. From the class group chat. And I suppose you have mine.”       “Yeah, I just wanted to..”

and you get trapped again in your thoughts, but his voice brings you back

      “Can we maybe meet up? I can clearly see that you can’t tell me over the phone, whatever the issue might be. Maybe face to face you will be able to find your words.”       “Oh shoot. I mean, yeah, I’ll meet you downtown in 15!”       “Alright, goodbye Y/n.”       “See you, Akaashi.” ¬was this actually happening?

¬

The 15 minutes had finally passed and you saw him on a bench, waiting for you. You almost forgot about the reason you called him when you noticed how pretty was Akaashi in the moonlight. Akaashi was an observant man so it hasn’t passed much time until he noticed your red and puffy eyes, a subtle mark on your face, your pink nose and your dry lips. Your eyes were shining and he felt so bad for thinking that you’re beautiful after something awful probably happened to you.

      “I’m sorry. You probably had better things to do.”

      “Well, I mean, we don’t know each other that well. Of course I had better things to do since we’ve never talked before, but my feet dragged me here. And my brain wasn’t the one who told you that I wanna meet up with you. I don’t know why I did that.” He watches your bright expression fade away and being replaced by a disappointed one. He didn’t mean it to sound like he didn’t wanna be here.

      “From all you know, I could actually be a murderer.” he lets out a subtle smile after finishing the sentence and you can’t help but to smile as well, even though your smile is not that subtle as his but it makes him proud of himself.

There’s was a chaotic silence and you weren’t making any visual contact, but instead you were stargazing. You never actually noticed how bright the sky was at night. It wasn’t that bright, like during the day, making your eyes hurt when you look at it; it was a peaceful light.

 You were analyzing the stars; but Akaashi was analyzing the most beautiful one, who was standing next to him.

He couldn’t help but let his thoughts wonder: was it a problem with your parents? maybe you had some bullies? worse; an abusive boyfriend? He comes back to reality when he notices that you’re open your mouth, wanting to say something.         “Can you help me become a better person?”

But.. what makes you think you aren’t a good person, Y/n? Who told you that you need to change? he was wondering.You look slightly over your shoulder just to see him with his mouth a bit open, with a surprised expression.

      “Well, Akaashi? Are you the one with no words right now?”       “No, Y/n. But why would you do that?”       “You mean, why do I wanna become a good person?”       “No, I mean, why would you change something about yourself? What makes you think you are a bad person?”

You were the shocked one right now. I mean, he saw you as a good person? He doesn’t think you are mean? He doesn’t have a bad impression about your sudden crying at school and your anger issues?

      “What do you mean? You don’t know me outside of the school, you only know me as a classmate. Have you not seen the way I act in class? Have you not heard everyone’s opinions? That I am-“

      “I mean yeah, I did. But do I look like the type of person who follows the herd? Am I not allowed to my own opinion, Y/n?”

      “Of course you are.” you feel bad for almost yelling at him. His eyes looked sad.       “Standing right behind you for such a long time made me know you without even realising it. I’ve noticed so many little details about you, and please don’t think of me as a pervert or something. But you were in front of me everyday so- “Calm down, Akaashi. I won’t.” you say laughing, unable to stop. He was cute getting flustered over the thought that you may get him wrong.

      “I am calm, Y/n.. but, why do you wanna change something about you, after all?” then everything comes back to you; the sound of your dad shouting at you, then the slap; the insults from your friends; so you shed a tear ¬      

      Akaashi is actually worried now; he notices again the mark on your face so he builds up the courage to ask you what happened.

“Akaashi, please. I know I can be angry and mean for no reason at all sometimes, I know I may not be the best person. But tell me that I am a good person. I need you to tell me that despite all that, I am actually a good friend, a good daughter, a good person overall. Because I need this, you have to reassure me or I might give up on being good for real, and be exactly like how they are picturing me to be.”

       He is processing every word you’re saying and his heart breaks; why did you have such a bad impression about yourself?       “Y/n.. You know I just told you that staying behind you made me realise so many things about you. Even if we haven’t talked, it feels like we are actually good friends,  because I’ve seen you crying during class, burying your head in your backpack thinking no one notices. I’ve seen you being so proud of youself after passing a test that most of the class had failed; because in the next second you would message your parents letting them know; I’ve seen how affected you are by our classmates’ harsh words. Trust me, your anger issues aren’t that big of a problem. You have  nothing on Bokuto’s emo mode.”       There’s the smile he’s been wanting to see again.       “The conclusion is that I can clearly see the fact that you’re not just a good person; but a blessing in your parents’ and friends’ lives. And if they don’t appreciate you, it’s their loss. Even if we never spoke until tonight, I felt somehow close to you.”       “So.. after all, I am a good person?” your eyes can’t meet his because you know you’ll burst out crying. But he was the first person to make you cry tears of joy. You needed this so much, you wanna feel this sensation more often ; the feeling of someone having faith in you and not wanting you to be the best out of everyone, but the best version of yourself.       “Of course you’re not. You’re actually hilarious when you’re angry. I am used to sudden mood swings, trust me. Maybe you just hadn’t met the right people.”

-

And you knew he was right. It actually was just about perspective. You may look like the bad guy, but in someone else’s story, you are a good person. From someone else’s point of view, you are actually the best. You just need to meet the people who will understand you and will immediately shape a connection with you; 

¬ it is all about perspective and being in the right place, with the right people.

omg this came out way longer than I wanted it to be but it kinda helped me getting my emotions out? I really really hope you like it bb!!:’( I still have second thoughts about it.

- Riley

[well-shit-im-a-morosexual-now]

There's a new lesson that I can't get to, so I'm going to you!

-35 Anon

Ahhhh??? I absolutely loved this lesson? It's a mostly mammon focused lesson (thanks to all the other brothers nearly dying) with angel backstory/hierarchy added in!????? I'm bouncing off the walls

LESSON 43 SPOILERS

It starts the next day after Solomon nearly kills MC with Mammon waking up looking for breakfast while complaining about the sun (fair enough) he gets annoyed when no one else is up, breakfast is not made and MC is the only one he finds. MC (with what I can only presume is a ridiculous eyebrow wiggle) says 'guess it's just you and me huh?....all alone....' Mammon blushes and says 'that literally cannot be the first thing I hear from you in the morning you're gonna give me a boner' (he actually says something like 'yeah...but don't say sweet, romantic stuff to me first thing in the morning cause you're gonna get me excited')

Mammon complains about the others sleeping in late and says he's gonna not so gently wake them up (this shit validates my HC that Mammon's an early bird and I dunno it just makes me happy) Mammon, with MC trailing behind him, goes to find his brothers. Lucifer is still asleep in his room, Mammon says this is probably a sign pointing to the beginning of the end, Lucifer says 'actually I'm dying cause the scent and flavour of Solomon's food bubbled up in the middle of the night so I'm going the fuck to sleep good night'. Satan wonders what exactly Solomon's food is cause it was able to not have an effect for hours and then suddenly come up again to kill them - he then passes out. Belphie is by Beel's bedside screaming at him to not go into the light, Mammon wonders if maybe Beel's just dying of hunger and Beel says there's no way in hell he's gonna eat anything and Mammon calls Beel out on being an imposter, Beel collapses on the bed and Belpie laments the fact that Beel's dying and that there's nothing he can do. Mammon says 'ugh bro you look like ya gonna die too' and Belphie says 'yeah well i feel like I'm gonna die ever since i ate some custard as a midnight snack and actually maybe it wasn't custard...maybe it was some weird as dessert solomon made cool cool cool i'm gonna pass out too'. Beel says 'Me too' and mammon wonders about the power behind Solomon's cooking. Levi I'm assuming is dead cause no matter how much Mammon pounded on his door and asked him to say something there was no reply so RIP. Asmo blames Mammon for getting sick, cause the bottled water Mammon brought for Asmo when he asked for it the previous night was probably some weird concoction Solomon made. Apparently Asmo's been hearing things ever since he drank it. He also despairs not being able to go the cafe with MC before collapsing on his bed. Mammon considers the fact that Solomon's food should probably be classified as a lethal weapon. Later in the corridor Mammon says that it seems like MC and Mammon are the only ones who came outta this unharmed but like MC nearly died the previous night so what the fuck is your stomach made out of Mammon!? When MC asks this he says he has no fucking clue either but it looks like their entire fridge is now a nuclear waste dump and that they should probably go get some food and medicine (you know these idiots are never gonna return and the others are gonna die).

They go to the Angel's Halo but it's still closed and they decide to come back later, MC ever the opportunist says 'hey ik your brothers are like dying rn and that sucks but ugh wanna make this a date?' And Mammon who has to live with 6 others who are in love with the same person as him and are constant cockblocks says 'shit yeah them being on death's door will probably be the only time we can spend time together without the others breathing down our necks, guess we gotta actually thank -the devs and their massive soft spot for Mammon- Solomon'. Mammon tells MC stories about the other times the brothers were sick, smiling about how they always take things to the extreme (levi had a slight fever and freaked out and turned Henry into Lotan, Asmo had a cold and all his fans came to the house to take care of him and it turned into a party). He says since they are in the human world now they wouldn't have to worry about anything too crazy...then he ruins it by basically saying 'probably'. They go to buy medicine with Lucifer's credit card. MC can ask him how he got it and he'll say it's fine cause they'll just buy food and medicine and only a few things for himself. Or MC can say 'yeah but would medicine actually help?' and Mammon will say 'good point considering it's Solomon's food but we might as well throw some pepto bismol at it and hope for the best.' While heading to the market, Mammon starts blushing about how MC and him heading to the market to buy groceries for dinner sorta feels like something newlyweds would do and hwuidhqowsho8ef7ydjb I'M SCREECHING!? Look me in the eye and tell me this man doesn't have a whole ass colour coded wedding planner aihdhwgdxugz he probably started making it a week after meeting MC. So they head to the market and I shit you not I screamed cause the butcher WHO FUCKING GAVE ADVICE TO MC & BEEL ABOUT THEIR RELATIONSHIP calls out to MC. LOOK I joked about this happening last time but I didn't actually think it would???? and not this fast either! I thought i was gonna have to write a fic about this poor Butcher but solmare's really just giving it to me for free huh? When the butcher greets MC Mammon asks if he knows them and the butcher says that they stopped by the previous day (and look this part is kinda silly and self indulgent but some random as butcher just casually using they/them pronouns made me so happy???). The butcher then asks what the occasion is and if MC is inviting their friend to a party.  Mammon, sweet beautiful Mammon goes word for word "Friend? Me? Nah, nah, I ain't just a friend.   The two of us LIVE together." Bro at this point I'm in actual tears just imagining this whole scenario. the butcher stutters out an "Ah, I...I see..." MC has a horrid flashback to the previous day of the butcher happily giving them relationship advice for Beel. The Butcher and MC just silently stare at each other for a sec before MC goes "um so yeah ik that happened yesterday but see this one is the one I'm actually serious about." Mammon goes "hey!? wtf who's the OTHER one!?" Then to the poor butcher says "listen up, Me & MC are a THING, got it? so yeah MC's gonna show up with not one, not two but with six other hot guys at some point who are all gonna act like they're a couple BUT it doesn't mean anything  got it!? Specially if 'it's a real evil, sinister-lookin' dude with a huge ego and a heart as black as night' that guy especially doesn't mean shit to MC". The butcher says "o-okay". Anyway I desperately need this to be a running gag. Mammon later in really happy that the butcher thought they were a couple and living together and then Mammon who I'm 100% certain at this point has his and MC's entire lives together planned out starts blushing and sighing and saying how he really wishes it was just the two of them living together, sleeping in the same room (bruh I think it's implied enough to assume you already do this half the time), spending the whole day together and staying by each other's sides and how just the thought of all that is nice enough that he can't fight a smile. MC's stomach, much to mammon's dismay, ruins his daydreams by reminding everyone that they haven't had breakfast yet. They decide rather than waiting for the cafe to open to go get something to eat.

They decide to stop at a deli with a line of customers and I think I said this in my answer to your previous ask but I kinda just assumed Mammon would be the most comfortable in the human world and how it was kinda shown when they went to get pizza and later Asmo's dessert that he was able to act the most normal and actually noted when the others were acting weird and tried to reign them in. And that it was probably cause of how much he went to the human world for the witches and MC actually brings it up! They can either say that he seems pretty at home in the human world and he says something like 'oh? I'm just acting like I normally would' or they can ask him if he eats at delis a lot and he says that whenever he gets hungry while he's in the human world for the witches he'll stop at a deli cause it's easy. He kinda gets a sad look while talking about the witches and for once MC gets to turn the tables and be the jealous one. They can ask him if he has pacts with anyone besides them and he says 'no obviously not, do you think I went around making pacts with random people' ....except MC was a random person when he made a pact with them and I've always thought Mammon started getting a crush after making a pact but do you think he was kinda subconsciously curious even prior to it despite how much he tried to get rid of them? MC can also say "witches, huh...?" And mammon goes 'jyggfsdyugadsyu wait are you actually jealous!?" he then leughs, calls MC a dummy and asks how they could be jealous of the witches. AND!! this part made me so happy cause they only mentioned it once before in the main storyline but it was important enough that they had a whole backstory UR card for it and I was wondering if they'd bring it up now since they were in the human world - mammon gets all sad and says there's a reason he can't refuse the witches. he kinda hesitates around telling them that he borrowed some money, and they took over some of his debts and "...And some other stuff, too" (Me, banging my fists on the table: SHOW ME HIS CHILD SOLMARE! PLS! LET MC HAVE A DAUGHTER! or at least give me a name) MC asks if Lucifer knows about this, Mammon says he probably does cause lucifer's his big brother and you can't keep any secrets from your big brother. then he sighs and says he wishes he could live in the human world forever cause he wouldn't have to listen to lucifer's lectures anymore. He seems to realise what exactly he implied cause he goes silent and starts blushing and starts stuttering through saying that what he actually means is that if MC really wants him to stay with them then he might be willing to. They're interrupted by customers talking about a rumour that drinking coffee from the new cafe would make the person you have a crush on fall madly in love with you so obviously Mammon says fuck the deli and drags MC away to the cafe. MC sighs about Mammon being really easy to read. Mammon seems to finally remember that he's supposed to be a tsundere and says him suddenly wanting coffee has nothing to do with the rumour so don't you dare think that and it's not like he's gonna chug their coffee just so MC would fall madly in love with him. MC quite literally goes 'no you' and says well sure you won't chug the coffee but i will and then you'll fall madly in love with me. Mammon, blushing and stuttering, says 'okay but you gotta warn me before saying stuff like that cause it could literally kill me also wtf 'I'm sorta ALREADY madly in love with you...' if you make me fall any harder we're both screwed." He then walks into Luke.

Luke looks adorable!??????????? Before realising who it is Mammon snaps at him to watch where he's going and then goes speechless. Luke says he saw a couple arguing and came to check it out cause they looked like trouble (can't believe Simeon sent a child to scope out a suspicious couple screaming in the middle of the sidewalk about who loves the other the most). Mammon takes offense at the arguing comment and Luke brushes him off to instead talk to Mc about not seeing them in a long time. Mammon snaps at being brushed off and Luke just completely ignores him to hug MC and keep talking about how it's really MC. Mammon does he whole 'no hugging, no getting close, no staring I don't want your germs on MC' routine. MC ignores him and tells Luke that they really missed him, Luke says he missed them too and that actually he missed MC 100X whatever amount they missed him and that he planned on getting in touch with them but the grand opening had them busy. Inside the cafe they meet Simeon who is happily surprised that MC and Mammon are their first customers but that they aren't supposed to open yet. MC asks them what the cafe is about and they say it's a cover for them while they are in the human world and when MC then asks them why they're here Simeon says that Michael appointed him to coordinate relations between the human world and celestial realm. MC and Mammon's stomachs start growling loud enough to resemble Beel's and Simeon offers them breakfast when they remember they haven't eaten. MC catches them up on what's happened and Luke and Simeon laugh about MC now officially being the brothers' babysitter. Mammon says that the angels are really starting to get on his nerves and what they really came for was the coffee that everyone's talking about.

Simeon says that it's just a stupid rumour. MC says but wouldn't it be good for business. Simeon says yeah but since the cafe is just a cover they don't really care about making money and that as angels marketing under a false advertisement is something he can't condone. mammon asks how a rumour like that started and Simeon says that a girl had accidentally walked into the cafe thinking it was some other place and he had given her a free cup of coffee just to see if their new brew tasted good. the girl had later had unexpected, dramatic good luck in her romantic life and had spread the rumour. MC asks if this means Simeon has cupid like powers. Simeon says that he doesn't have that kind of powers, though some angels do. Luke says that angels possess powers from the moment they are born but like humans who are good at some things and bad at others, certain angels can only do certain things with their powers and that angels are assigned a rank based on how skilled they are at what they can do. Simeon's an archangel. Archangels serve as warriors in the celestial realm. And this is really interesting cause it means that Simeon actually fought against the brothers during the war and was not just a passive bystander. It also means Mammon was probably an archangel cause of his 'warrior' card and probably the only archangel from his brothers considering they don't have similar cards. Mammon teases Luke about just being a lower level grunt and Luke says that's still just in training and in the process of determining what he's good at meaning he's not been assigned a rank yet. Simeon says that since Michael expects great things from Luke that'll be really successful. Mammon teases Luke about how if he works hard and aims for the stars he might one day be on the top - a seraph (If this is the highest rank does this mean that's what Michael and Lucifer were?). Luke says that he's actually hoping to be a principality, which mammon laughs about. Simeon finally serves breakfast and talks about wanting to find a way to squash the rumour. MC offers to help and Mammon (rightfully) calls them out on sticking their nose where it doesn't belong again and says he's not gonna help unless they offer to pay him in gold. MC uses puppy dog eyes. It's super effective. Man actually starts blushing and panting and gasping before he gives up and agrees to help. pls sir there's a child here. Simeon calls out Mammon for being a hopeless simp (he actually just says "You really do adore Mc, don't you Mammon?") Luke says MC and Mammon are fucking disgusting and if he watches another second of this BS he's gonna hurl.

while brainstorming about how exactly they are gonna spread a rumour about the first rumour not being true Mammon says that if people saw a couple drink the coffee and instantly break up it might work but hahah it's not like you have one of those. Simeon thinks it's a brilliant idea. MC agrees and Mammon who has probably never been complimented for his plans combusts before pulling it together and puts on his confident narcissistic persona. Luke and Simeon eye up MC and Mammon as their potential couple. Mammon refuses cause he doesn't want to fight with MC even if it's just an act. Simeon offers for their breakfast to be on the house if Mammon agrees and Mammon says he already assumed it was (I mean so did I...). MC says they would really like Mammon to be their partner for this and obviously he instantly blushes and caves in. Luke calls MC out on being a manipulative little shit. Simeon asks MC and Mammon to practice a breakup before the customers come. MC can either start with 'there's something I want to tell you...' - Mammon asks if that's the way they are gonna start and then gets sad and asks them to reconfirm if this is actually an act. or they can start with 'ugh! I can't take it anymore!', and mammon gets shocked and then sad cause he says that since there are so many things wrong with him he can't decide what they are upset about and HOLY SHIT can we get this man some therapy!????? MC gets to pick one outta three problems. 1. He needs to return what he borrowed from them - he says he will eventually. 2. he needs to stand up to lucifer for once - he says he would if he could but each time he tries lucifer just gets worse. 3. he needs to just come out and admit he loves them - he blushes and says not in front of the angels and that he'll do it when they are alone. He then growls and says he has complaints too and that there's a lot he wants to say. he then starts dishing out actual grievances while Simeon and luke awkwardly watch. Luke says something along the lines of 'uhh i don't think he's acting anymore'. Mammon while blushing and sad says that MC is always flirting with others, and asks why they stay up gaming with levi all night, or why they let Asmo touch them all the time,  and why they let Belphie sleep on their lap without offering Mammon to do so, And how he absolutely hates the way they lock eyes with Lucifer and just smile and how he doesn't even want them to breathe in front of Lucifer and can we pls talk about the complex Mammon has regarding Lucifer? Lucifer really just took all his trauma and daddy issues and passed it on to his kids huh? Mammon again while blushing says he wants nothing to do with someone like MC and that it's over he then tries to growl at them but he fails cause "Dammit! Like I could ever really say that to you! I love you, MC! And I'll NEVER break up with you, okay?! NEVER!" and god this man is so soft my insides are melting i can't deal with this shit. Simeon sighs about Mammon being useless ((((Probably while Mammon and MC cling on to each other and cry about having to fake break up with each other i dunno they're both pretty useless))))

Since the whole fake breakup thing failed the cafe is packed and Simeon has MC and Mammon working for him during the rush. Satan and Beel end up walking in, when MC asks them how they are doing they both say they are better. Satan had found a curse that ended up transferring all his illness to someone he hates (RIP Lucifer i guess) and Beel's stomach is strong enough that he got over it quicker than the rest. Despite insisting they're only here as paying customers Simeon puts them to work with a sweet smile and a dark purple aurora reminiscent of Lucifer's and a flash of lightening (I love how they keep revealing that Simeon is secretly terrifying) with the reasoning that the cafe is flooded cause Mammon couldn't fake breakup with MC and as Mammon's brothers it's their duty to help out. Beel cries about having to work without being given to eat but is too terrified to actually protest. Mammon suggests MC and him sneaking away now that Satan and Beel are there, MC gives their best impression of Lucifer yelling Mammon (which considering it's previously fooled both Beel and Mammon is probably really good) and he gets back to work

back in their sitting room at home the four of them are beat, though Beel is happy considering he ate all the BLT sandwiches Simeon gave them as payment. Satan says it's a surprise to see the angels here and Mammon tells them about how Michael wants them to coordinate relations between the human world and celestial realm, Satan says that's sus cause that's usually a job for dominions not archangels and that it probably means that Michael is planning something. Mammon says "so you mean he's plotting something again?" . MC can ask about Michael from 1. Mammon - He says he's a demon masquerading as an angel. And that the punishments he gave Mammon gave him shiver, though Satan says that Mammon earned those punishments. Still doesn't excuse the fact that an angel was able to deliver punishments that can still make a demon who had to survive with Lucifer's punishments shiver... 2. Satan - Satan says that back then he was still just a part of Lucifer and could only see the world through Lucifer's eyes. He says that Michael was everything that humans imagine an angel to be and more and that he had a certain presence about him. Beel says the same could be said about Lucifer. 3. Beel -  he said he smelled tasty.......like sweets. Mammon says that he was always eating sweet stuff. Mammon says that Michael was A LOT like Lucifer. Satan says that while they were the polar opposite in terms of appearance it felt like they were twins. Mammon says that Michael was crazy about Lucifer (I mean he still has a weird shrine for him so yeah...) and that he really cared about lucifer. Satan says that it's cause Lucifer embodied everything Michael wasn't but wished to be and that he projected himself onto lucifer. Beel says they should probably open up an umbrella. Mammon goes wtf and Beel says cause it's raining. Mammon goes 'bro wtf we're inside'. Satan goes 'actually wait no I'm getting wet'. MC notes a leak in the ceiling, above which is Asmo's bathroom. They've been in this Mansion for little over a week and it's already leaking...

That's the end of the lesson. I'll post screenshots of Luke and Simeon's outfits in a bit. Cause they've been talking about Michael's appearance and personality and cause at the end of the last season he told MC he'll meet them soon do you think we'll actually get to see him? Is it bad that the angels scare me more than the demons? Since they brought up the witches while in the human world do you think we'll get to meet them/have more backstory? hdgudysidhzsjb I loved this lesson and I have so many questions that need to be answered... Let me know what you think!