#I haven’t seen anything since everyone was hate playing chapter 2 lol

[fagbearentertainment]

Well now that opila bird is in my house ig I actually have to play banban now

[yoontaethings]

normal kind of love — jjk (1)

pairing: jungkook x reader 

rating: explicit

word count: 2.5k

warnings: a lot of cussing and some teasing if you squint, but other than that none really (the warnings will come next chapter lmao)

you’re one half of hollywood’s on-screen it couple. the greatest chemistry known on-screen with the one and only, jeon jungkook, the bane of your existence.

a/n: this was supposed to be a longer chapter but i decided to split it in half to tease potential readers mwahaha btw this chapter is very very unedited, though i did postpone the upload because i had to remove some parts because i just thought the story didn’t need those bits anymore lol but the rest of this story i haven’t even read through yet, i just wrote and wrote and wrote so please excuse any errors (my tenses might also not be consistent but i’ll edit this soon)

taglist: @min-nicoleee @thisartemisnevermisses @ggukkieland @kokoandkookie @somelazysundays

There was no way.

There was no way in hell they were pairing you up with him. Again.

You were confirmed to be cast as the female lead in the movie before any other characters were casted. They should have chosen a different male lead for this romance film. Heck, even Kim Taehyung, a friend of yours, received an offer for the role and you were certain he planned to take it. Unfortunately for you, even if Taehyung wanted the role, he couldn’t accept it because of scheduling conflict with another film he’s already working on.

Jeon Jungkook, an actor you starred alongside in “Dangerous Illusion”, was just confirmed as the male lead of your upcoming movie “Chosen for Pleasure”. The same man who seemed to make it his life goal to ruin you. After Jungkook was confirmed to play the male lead in your upcoming movie, fans on Twitter have been blowing up about it and made you two a trending topic worldwide. Elated fans mentioned you in their tweets expressing how happy they were to see you two again together. You wish you could say you felt the same.

The previous movie you worked on was a thriller/mystery. You played the part of Jungkook's wife in the film. The film was a blockbuster hit, as a result of the well-thought storyline, yet additionally because of its leads. Fans adored the chemistry between you and Jungkook, regardless of not having a lot of romantic scenes in the film. There were a lot of fans who wanted to see you two on-screen once more, this time, in a romance focused film. Looks like their wishes were coming true.

To add insult to injury, your impending film was going to be an adult romance. It required some steamy scenes that normally didn't trouble you because you were a true professional, yet absolutely irritates you now since you need to do them with Jeon Jungkook.

The script reading was to be done today and your eyes opened an hour later than the time you set for your alarm because of the fucking snooze button. Seriously, why were snooze buttons even invented? They just allowed people to sleep through their alarms continuously.

Hand reaching for the phone on your nightstand, you knocked over a booklet that was over it. It was the script you spent hours reading to grab a sense of the character you were going to portray. Obviously, you already knew the basics about the part you were going to play, but knowing the entire story helped in portraying your character.

Your eyes squinted at the bright light of your phone that had the numbers 8:33 glaring at you, unlocking it to see a couple of texts and missed calls from your manager.

‘Are you awake yet?’

‘Please don’t tell me you forgot about the script reading today’

‘Ok I know you’re still asleep but just make sure you get ready on time, being late won’t do you and your image any favors’

‘I’ll pick you up at 9’

You rolled your eyes at his messages. You loved Hoseok and he was the best manager you could have been given from your agency, but he nagged too much. He was also your friend and his endless nags made you want to rip your eyeballs out sometimes because even when you’re supposed to unwind with him, he never forgets to remind you of your job.

‘I’m the fucking lead, Hobi, they’ll wait for me’

You slapped your phone back onto the nightstand and started going about with your morning routine. You didn’t have a lot of time, and even though you knew they would definitely wait for you, you hated being that bitch who made people wait so you took a quick shower and slapped on some sunscreen, powder, and finishing off with your go-to lipstick. You didn’t bother with makeup and dressing up. This was just going to be a script reading and sure, there were going to be photos taken but the thousands of dollars you’ve spent on facials and treatments already made sure your face was at least flawless despite the lack of effort.

Bringing only your phone, wallet and script, you exited your building and as usual, a shiny black van already awaited outside. Hoseok was leaning on it, scrolling through his phone when he sensed your presence and looked up.

“Oh, thank god you’re on time.” He exhaled in relief, pocketing his phone.

“I value sleep but you’re well aware I also value my career.”

Hoseok grinned. “Now there’s the y/n I know.” He then slid the van door open and you entered without another word.

The drive was pretty much uneventful, with you scrolling through your social media, seeing what fans have been tweeting about recently and with Hoseok humming along to the random pop music playing.

You longed for a distraction, something much more interesting than working your thumb throughout the drive because of the chasm that you were about to jump into when you arrived on set. You weren’t stupid enough to forget about the man who got the role of your romantic interest in the film. But you were wise enough to not let it haunt you for the past weeks. Now though, you can’t really avoid it anymore since you were supposed to be seeing him in person again after almost 2 years. You didn’t exactly leave on the best terms with Jungkook but who knows, maybe you’ll be able to act civil around each other.

At least you were sure you were going to act civil around him, already decided on taking the higher path. You’re not so sure about him, but fingers crossed he’ll at least be an adult about the situation and pretend he can stand being in the same room as you.

Soon enough, you were entering the room the script reading was to be held in. Bowing and greeting the actors and staff seated around the table as you passed by to get to the last vacant seat. You caught Jungkook’s eyes following your movements as you sat down. Luckily, he was seated across from you and it was easier to ignore his presence with the staff members greeting and coddling you.

As always, script reading began with actors introducing themselves and the role they’re going to play. As the female lead, you started off.

“Hello everyone. I’m y/n y/l/n and I’m going to take on the role of Yuri.” Hands clapped around you as you sat back down.

“Hello, I’m Jeon Jungkook and I’ll be playing Ryan.”

You didn’t bother clapping unlike the rest and avoided the eyes of the voice’s origin.

The script reading continued without a hitch– for the most part. The other cast members were very friendly, and laughter was exchanged during the read. The same couldn’t be said for you and Jungkook though.

When lines between your characters were exchanged, there was a weird tension in the room. It felt like everyone else were holding their breaths and waiting for either of you two explode and announce that you can’t do this film anymore. As dramatic as that would be, none of that happened. Instead, cheesy romantic lines sounded flat and bored from both you and Jungkook. The director made a tsk-ing sound whenever that happened.

“It’s always been you.” You read. The script said that Yuri and Ryan stared in adoration towards each other before Ryan uttered his next words.

“Marry me?” Jungkook asked.

You nodded your head as a wrap for the script reading. According to the script, there was supposed to be a kissing scene at the end, so you make ridiculous smooching noises. The cast burst into giggles before the director stood from his seat.

“…and that’s a wrap!” He clasped his hands together. “Hopefully when we start shooting things only look up from there.” He flitted his eyes between you and Jungkook.

Honestly, you wish that too but from yours and Jungkook’s history, you don’t really think that’s possible.

You were both professionals though and you’re sure you could at least count on him to make the on-screen romance feel real.

“I’m sorry.” Hoseok said with pity in his eyes.

“Wha- but… why?” You asked, confused with what was happening.

Your part in the new film ‘The Notebook: Remake’ has apparently been withdrawn. As one of the rising stars in Hollywood, this was a really great opportunity for you. It’s one of the most anticipated films and accepting the offer of being the female lead in the movie was a no-brainer. Anyone who refuses that role is just stupid.

But now they were apparently taking it back.

Hoseok sighed. “There were too many scandals surrounding you recently. It doesn’t matter if they’re true or not, but you’ve been seen in hotels that Jeon Jungkook has been in too, and in everyone’s eyes you’re now secretly seeing him.”

“But we’ve never even been seen together in any of those photos. Don’t people know the word fucking coincidence?” Your brows furrowed, fists clenching at your sides. “And what does this have to do with my role in the film?”

“It seems they wanted someone with a ‘cleaner image’ and someone who’ll get the film to be a hit. Apparently, the romance won't be convincing if the female lead is dating someone in real life.”

You stared at Hoseok. He stared back waiting for a lash out, an angry outburst, anything really, but you remained silent, eyes unmoving. Soon enough, the dam doors burst open and the tears suddenly came streaming down your face. Hoseok exhaled and wrapped his arms around you.

“Hobi what did I do so wrong to deserve this?” you sobbed into his chest.

“Shh, it’s not your fault they’re all dumbasses. But you know the industry, y/n. We’ll find better films for you, okay?”

“Why is Jeon Jungkook such a thorn on my side? Why is he always ruining everything for me?”

“We can’t blame him, honey. He’s probably a victim in this too because of those damn rumor outlets.” Hoseok rubbed his hands along your back.

“But I’m getting the short end of the stick! The rumor is probably just feeding his bad boy persona!”

“Life’s unfair, y/n. Surely by now you’re aware of that. Just remember, karma’s going to bite them in the ass someday, okay? For now, do you want to call it a day and go home? I’ll drive you back and I’ll just report to the agency that you’re not feeling well.”

You nod your head, too listless to bother answering with words because there was only one thing on your mind right now.

Fuck Jeon Jungkook and his good looks. He just ruined the best opportunity for you. You were going to get him back for this. Like Hoseok said, karma’s going to bite him in the ass someday. And that karma was going to be you.

You were supposed to be looking forward to filming one of your dream movies with your dream director. But all you felt was dread when you arrived on set. You promised yourself that you’d stay unaffected to Jeon Jungkook, but you couldn’t help the distaste for him to be left on your face while filming.

The scene you were shooting was when your characters first met and the first takes were a total disaster. You and Jungkook barely spared each other a glance, even when your character was supposed to be enticed by him, breaking down Yuri’s cold exterior. A break was called after the 6th take because the director was so frustrated that he looked like he was about to call the casting director and replace his two leads.

You sighed, not knowing what to do with yourself after the announcement of a break. Your feet led you to your dressing room, ready to pass out on the couch but before you could, someone barged in. Your head turned towards the door, expecting it to be your manager or the director or anyone really, just not the person who currently stood at the doorway.

“Can we talk?” Jungkook asked. Your eyes were suddenly drawn to his biceps which bulged from his shirt as he crossed his arms. The damn arms looked delicious. Too bad they belonged to someone you would never ever be attracted to.

“Sure.” You shrugged your shoulders. You were sure he came here to talk to you about filming and how to work out your indifferences and shit like that and honestly, you were so tired of hating him you’re ready to just go along with whatever. Hating someone actually takes a lot of effort, you realize.

Jungkook stepped towards you until he’s close enough that you had to tilt your head upwards to look at his eyes. His eyes locked on yours for a moment before his arms uncrossed and one of his hands landed on the wall behind you. He successfully caged you in with no way out. His lips part and your eyes are drawn to the movement, feeling his exhales on your nose. You swallowed nervously.

Good lord his breath smelled so good.

“Babe, I’m sure you’re just as thrilled as I am to be working with you again as you are with me, but let’s not mess this up okay? Let’s get this over with perfectly and quickly so we don’t have to deal with each other again after. Deal?” His eyebrows raised in question and you nodded dumbly, unable to form a coherent sentence with how close he was to you.

You felt a sudden rush of heat down there and was mentally cursing the man in front of you for how much he was affecting you. He tilted his head to the side and leaned in closer to your face as if he was about to kiss you then he suddenly stopped, his mouth forming a smirk, taunting you.

That smirk was all it took for you to snap back to reality. No, you were not going to let him take the upper hand here. A burst of confidence surged through you as you leaned closer to him too and allowed your lips to brush lightly against his cheek.

“Deal.”

You pulled away, satisfied with how his lips drooped apparently not expecting that. You looked down and there it was, the tenting of his pants that brought a coy smile to your lips. Ha, take that.

You glanced back up at him, your fingers trailing over his thighs. “Aw, didn’t realize you saw me that way Jeon.” You abruptly pulled away and walked out of the room without another word, leaving him hard and defeated.

This is the beginning of his karma, you thought as you grinned to yourself.

[butwhatifidothis]

I did it! Finally fucking did it! I 100% the support log for 3H….Holy shit, that took longer than I was expecting, lol. 

(Long rant, so heads up.)

I came in thinking “Oh they finally time-locked the supports, so I don’t have to have the damn cursor mocking me every time I open the menu like in Awakening and Fates, hurr hurr”. No no no no no. At least for Awakening and Fates, it was on my dumb ass for pressing the S-support and saving when I knew I shouldn’t. First off, if they wanted us to regain supports for Byleth in NG+, why the heck are supports for characters like Edelgard, Rhea, Dorothea and Lindhart locked? I don’t mean time-locked like the post-TS supports in a regular playthrough, I mean deadass “you can’t buy this, period” locked. “Oh it’s because you haven’t advanced that far in the story yet”. I can buy post-TS supports for the other characters, what makes El and Rhea exceptions?! The only thing that would be lost is that I don’t have to replay their entire route to get their S-support twice. It’s not like there’s enough differences between Bylad and Bylass to warrant the supports being locked, none of the characters specify a specific gender in their dialogue, and as far as different models go, changing models during a cutscene is coded into the game, so that should be no issue.  

After going through the monastery option enough times, the hubworld is in this weird limbo state where it feels like it was made specifically for Byleth’s benefit (faculty training, recruiting party members, etc,) but the rest of the party seems to benefit from it instead (Instructions, Motivation points, etc). The Explore vs Battle options just don’t mix well, which feels like poor design choice. You can focus on auxiliary battles to raise your party’s level, but at the cost of potentially missing out on more party members. You can instead focus on the monastery to recruit party members, but at the cost of Byleth falling behind due to splitting activity points between recruiting and faculty training, and being in the monastery means less time grinding for levels. This isn’t as much of a problem in NG+, but if a game needs NG+ to lessen a design problem, then that’s more of a sign to me that the idea itself needed more ironing out. 

 As far as using the monastery to raise support points goes, the hubworld definitely needs a revamp. The only (good) options available are Meal Time and Choir Practice, with the latter being limited to once per week and the former making me think that the monastery must eat their own weapons to survive due to how fucking scarce food ingredients are. Getting meat and fish isn’t too big of an issue so long as you have enough money, but produce might as well be an urban legend. There were too many times where I had 60+ fish/meat, but produce was at fucking 1. I get that they wanted to be “realistic” in having seeds grow once per week, but if it’s at the cost of a gameplay element being nigh unplayable, then some more thought needs to be put into it. Sothis is a goddess of life and time, maybe her powers allow Byleth to make plants grow faster. Just something to make this section actually playable. 

The final thing I wanted to talk about when it comes to the monastery is that, for some baffling reason, it is entirely possible to lock yourself out of key events like S-supports or being able to choose CF, simply by skipping to the end of the month. I’m not sure why this is a thing. It’s not like the game was designed with speedruns in mind (I mean, it is possible to beat a route in an hour, but fuck me if I ever succeeded in that), and nothing happens like a prompt popping up that you have to explore the monastery during that month or even limiting your options to just Explore (which the game has done before). This is especially weird for the quest in getting Jeralt’s ring (how to access S-supports), since Byleth is supposed to be sad in this month, so not being able to do seminars or Byleth being undeployable during auxiliary battles would make sense. 

The option to choose CF is even worse though, because at least for Jeralt’s ring it’s a Red Quest that doesn’t allow you to finish exploring unless you complete it. For Edelgard, however? A dime-a-dozen quest prompt you can entirely look over and skip. No prompt by the game, no indication to talk to Edelgard, nothing. FFS, Rhea’s tea time quest was given more thought. At least her quest marker is a unique color. 

(End of rant…sort of) 

…So anyways, that was my experience with the game, lmao. Now you or someone else may be thinking, “nonnie, if you had this many problems completing the game, why did you bother?”, and the answer to that good question is…I’m not completely sure, lol. I know there’s more than one reason why, so bear with me here. I know part of it is due to sunk-cost fallacy (“I’m already this far into the game, I might as well fully complete it”), but I think a bigger reason is because I knew ahead of time that the routes were so similar to each other that there was little point in having a route split to begin with (except for CF, but who gives a fuck about that?). Despite all of my bitching, I do really like 3H even if I admit that it’s my least favorite FE game that I’ve played so far. I guess a part of me just wanted to like the game more despite my issues with it. 

Now that I think about it, maybe the main reason was for fear of future mainline games. People are fear to like whatever part of a game that they wish, but I do think that 3H introduced some fundamental storytelling flaws that I’d rather not see repeated in the future, with me focusing on 3 in particular: 1) The Monastery, 2) Route Splits and 3) Byleth. 

Aside from what I already talked about in regards to the monastery, if we are going to get another hubworld in the new FE title, have it to where it doesn’t conflict with how the rest of the story is presented. Is it better to simply tell us that the Western Church is xenophobic in an easily skippable side quest early on, or is it better to show us? Enemy Western Church NPCs going after foreign party members like Dedue or Petra more aggressively and calling them “animals” or the like, the map having Duscari NPCs locking themselves indoors for fear that the Western Church will persecute them, things of that nature. Is it better to tell us that there has been civil unrest in the Empire and the citizens revolting against Edelgard, or is it better to show us? Enemy Adrestian Civilian NPCs, assassins specifically going after Edelgard in a map, maybe one where a large farmland has been stripped bare. Things like that. 

I’d rather do away with the Persona-calendar/Monastery hubworld, but if they are here to stay then they need enough content in it to keep the player engaged for 20-odd chapters, because there isn’t enough content in Garreg Mach to even hold up 12 chapters. Speaking of more content, if there’s going to be another route split in the next title, then there needs to be enough differences in the routes that actually warrants having a route split. Fates already did this well in having the route split be early in the game, along with the plot and story maps of each route being different, you could even skip to the route split moment on subsequent playthroughs, so 3H’s approach in having to play the same 12 chapters 3-4 times just felt like a massive downgrade. Playing multiple routes should feel rewarding rather than tedious, is what I’m trying to say. 

Finally, and most importantly, I know that no one at IS is reading this but on the off chance that someone is - please, for the love of God, do not make another blank-slate/self insert main character like Byleth. Or at the very least, don’t have them be the focal point of the story, it’s a big reason why AM just works better than the other routes. For a game like FE, “self-insert” and “protagonist” goes as well as oil and water. Now, out of those three flaws listed, the Byleth one is what I’m hard set on. The monastery and route split flaws, my opinion might be flexible within reason, but the Byleth one…not so much, lol. If we really do get another self-insert doll for a main character, that alone is going to make the next game a hard sell for me, because seeing all the praise Byleth got (and has been getting) makes me fear that IS is going to take the wrong lesson from this and think they don’t have to put effort in making their protagonist anything resembling an actual person and their audience will still lap it up. It would be one thing if I just hated the character, but I don’t. I’m disappointed, which is even worse.

…With that said, it’s still better than whatever the heck Cap’n’Crunch is doing. Okay, rant over. For real this time.

—

I agree with a lot said here! But I do have a few disagreements, though they’re mostly my opinion than anything else lol

And this first one is probably like, extremely unpopular given how much shit I’ve seen flung at this aspect of 3H, but like… I actually really like the Monastery? Like yes, absolutely, it should have done more to not shelter the player from how bad the war is and it should change more with the world instead of being in this mostly limbo state where apparently seasons don’t real. I definitely also have those complaints, but to me, the Monastery was fine for the most part. A lot of the issues you brought up, like supports and Faculty Training and supplies for eating, weren’t a problem for me almost at all. My only real gripe is with how hard it is for Byleth to get training in Flying, Mounted and especially Heavy Armor without NG+ unlocking weapons ranks, since they don’t have access to Weekly Chores. I do believe I still managed to recruit everyone while only unlocking C in Faith on my Maddening playthrough of GD, but it certainly wasn’t easy. But I feel a lot of the problem people have with it are on subsequent playthroughs where they’re trying to do things like 100% any aspect of 3H, which yeah is gonna exacerbate the issues tenfold. Cuz like, while those three weapons ranks I mentioned are hard for Byleth to raise, on Normal mode you have unlimited auxiliary battles to help with all the other ones. 

Like, I wanted to get Claude’s Dex to the max amount right? Just cuz I felt like it. And in doing that I found out just how tedious it is to get levels once a unit gets to a certain point, just cuz while Normal Mode gives you the Retreat option that lets you keep exp so you can drop a unit down on a yellow spot and get a decent boost in exp… you can do that like, twice or thrice on a story chapter. Once if it’s auxiliary (and not the freebie one). And that’s if you even have internet. And using the greenhouse to get Ailiell Pomegranates was a pain because they weren’t really guaranteed even if I used nothing but the right seed - doing that is more consistent, but not always, and I usually only got one anyway. It was annoying! But I was also doing a specific thing that’s gonna heighten the flaws in the system that I never would have noticed - didn’t even notice - unless I did that. The flaws are still there, don’t get me wrong! The Monastery definitely still needs improvement, battles still need to be a little more streamlined for future playthrough, but the flaws can seem a bit bigger than they are once you do certain things outside of a casual playthrough, know what I mean?

But, for example, when replaying 3H on hard mode and looking to recruit everyone after my no recruitment run, I didn’t come across any dilemma over “recruitment or Byleth being good, pick one.” That was the run my Byleth was usable, in fact - my first blind run that was no recruitment (save for Shamir) had my Byleth be pretty much completely useless while literally everyone else was fine. Also never came across problems with supplies for cooking (or at least not any big enough to comment on). So like, while these (and the above stuff) can certainly be problems for players trying to do everything everything in 3H, at least from my experience I just haven’t come across them. The monastery itself definitely needed a better story implementation, but yeah. I could’ve just been lucky tho lmao

I don’t mind how they implemented trying to get on CF at all tho lol. If you’ve been playing the game like it suggests you do - supporting characters and exploring the monastery  there’s no reason for players to have missed getting on CF. If players wanted to ignore one of the biggest aspects of the game I don’t really feel that bad for them when they miss out on very achievable things. Plus, CF’s requirements are nothing in terms of FE’s madness when it comes to getting on a route. It may be more specific than any other route, but like I said, playing the game as the game tells you to would naturally land you in it (the only thing that might be a bit unfair is that I think if you talk with Edelgard at all that month you have to decide right then and there, and then the whole month is lost. Kinda ass). 

Binding Blade, for example, requires you to do specific things that few first time players would think to do in multiple, random chapters in order for you to get the best ending. With absolutely no warning as to when these chapters happen and what to do in them. And some of these requirements are not fun lmao, I’d prefer how they did it with CF than with how they’ve handled ~secret~ stuff before personally

Pretty much agree with everything else though! While 3H is actually one of my more favored games in the series, I’ll be the first to admit that its storytelling is in dire need of improvement. Having the story and lore of the game just be spat out in lore dumps and this or that NPC just isn’t that good. Or if they are going to do that, at the very least give some visuals to go along with it! Imagine how much impactful Rhea’s story would have been if it was in a visual format, like CGs and/or a cutscene. It still would be an info dump, but at least we can see for ourselves how horrific the Red Canyon was for her! And I do not want another avatar in whatever next mainline game we get, personality or not. We’ve evolved past the need for self-inserts that all the characters Just Like lmao

But thanks for sharing your thoughts!! And sorry that it took so long for me to get to answering ;w; 

[wickedobsessed101]

Fanfic Writer Asks

[SOURCE: criminal-minds-fanfiction: Most of the writer ask posts I come across are only like ten or so questions long so I thought I’d try to make a longer one because we like talking about our writing! Feel free to reblog!]

I’m answering all of these b/c I love Q & A’s about my writing, both for my fics and other things.

1) How old were you when you first starting writing fanfiction? It was 2013, so I was 14 years old. I’m now almost 23.

2) What fandoms do you write for and do you have a particular favourite if you write for more than one? I’m mostly in the Wicked Musical fandom, but I like to read for other fandoms, like Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, Chronicles of Narnia, ect.

3) Do you prefer writing OC’s or reader inserts? Explain your answer. OCs, but I’m more than willing to create an OC for someone based on characteristics they give me.

4) What is your favourite genre to write for? I love me some fluffy romance and hurt/comfort, but I also love some angsty drama.

5) If you had to choose a favourite out of all of your multi-chaptered stories, which would it be and why? OMG, don’t make me choose! They’re all my babies! I love all my children equally! They all hold special places in my heart.

6) If you had to delete one of your stories and never speak of it again, which would it be and why? Goodness, most of my stories prior to 2017, because I was in high school and had no idea what I was doing because I was just getting my feet wet with writing.

7) When is your preferred time to write? Anytime really. The latest I’ve stayed up writing a fic was 4AM. *Glares at ‘Threads of Truth’*

8) Where do you take your inspiration from? Where ever it happens to come up. I’m not picky. Movies, music, people I’ve seen on the street, random thoughts that enter my head, anything.

9) In your xxx fic, what’s your favourite scene that you wrote? In ‘Threads of Truth’, it’s a tie between Villy’s first date, and an argument that happens in an upcoming chapter. And that’s all I’m saying about that.

10) In your xxx fic, why did you decide to end it like that? Did you have an alternative ending in mind? In ‘Play The Game’, I liked the epilogue ending that I gave Elphaba with her family, even without Fiyero. I like writing her with kids. Another ending would be with the Fiyeraba still together, but I’m satisfied with the ending it has.

11) Have you ever amended a story due to criticisms you’ve received after posting it? I’ll go back and fix typos that are pointed out, but I don’t change plot stuff. Like, I wrote what I wrote and I will amend my technique in future stories.

12) Who is your favourite character to write for? Why? Other than my OCs, because I get to fully create them and my lowkey babies, I’d have to say G(a)linda. She has so much potential and she’s so much fun.

13) Who is your least favourite character to write for? Why? Boq. Not because I hate him (I don’t!), but because I don’t normally know what to do with him. If he’s not with Nessa, he’s literally just standing there like a brick wall. No offence, Boq!

14) How did you come up with the title for the xxx? - You can ask about multiple stories. [Ask me about a specific story(ies)]

15) If you write OC’s, how do you decide on their names? I usually change consonants and vowels to already existing names, or add unnecessary letters because... reasons.

16) How did you come up with the idea for xxx? [Ask me about a specific story]

17) Post a line from a WIP that you’re working on. “Hopefully, this will soak up any more leaks.” (Upcoming Wicked fanfic)

18) Do you have any abandoned WIP’s? What made you abandon them? Yes, 2. Both of them are a few years old and I’ve grown as a writer since then. Maybe one day, I’ll edit them and repost, but not anytime soon.

19) Are there any stories that you’ve written that you’d really love to do a sequel to? Not everything can have a sequel, y’all! XD

20) Are there any stories that you wished you’d ended differently? Yes! Around 60% of them.

21) Tell me about another writer(s) who you admire? What is it about them that you admire? @vinkunwildflowerqueen @raven-curls @mylittleelphie @weaselspeedfanfic Ultimate Queen of Cliffies

22) Do you have a story that you look back on and cringe when you reread it? This goes back to Question #6; most of what I posted prior to 2017.

23) Do you prefer listening to music when you’re writing or do you need silence? Silence. I need to focus.

24) How do you feel about writing smutty scenes? I can’t write it. They’ll make out, and then be pregnant in the next chapter. Y’all can do the math for yourselves.

25) Have you ever cried whilst writing a story? YES! Yes, I have! Both sad tears and tears of joy. I’ve also cringed from second-hand embarrassment at the things the characters do and say. I’m not in control of their actions all the time. Sometimes they tell me what they’re gonna do, and I’m like, “Well, alright, then.”

26) Which part of your xxx fic was the hardest to write? [Ask me about a specific story]

27) Do you make a general outline for your stories or do you just go with the flow? I write bullet points of things I want to happen in a chapter on the Word Doc, or in the story as a whole, and I try to keep those bullet points in order. And the Notes App on my phone holds a lot of my ideas, and sometimes full scenes.

28) What is something you wished you’d known before you started posting fanfiction? That I’d become obsessed with writing and continue doing it for almost ten years, as well as expanding to writing plays and musicals.

29) Do you have a story that you feel doesn’t get as much love as you’d like? Yeah. I’m not gonna say which one, but just know there’s one... or a few.

30) In contrast to 29 is there a story which gets lots of love which you kinda eye roll at? Yes, and I’m still not gonna say which one(s). I want all the love!

31) Send me a fic recommendation and I’ll post it for my followers to see! (The asker is to send the rec, not the answerer) Yeah, sure!

32) Are any of your characters based on real people? Yes. Villy Doiir from ‘Threads of Truth’ is based on 4 people I know in real life, all mixed together into one wholesome, mother figure/ mentor. Perhaps that’s why I like writing her so much.

33) What’s the biggest compliment you’ve gotten? All reviews keep me going, no matter the length. But I love it when people review saying that they picked up on little references that were really just for me. It makes me feel like we’ve shared a moment.

34) What’s the harshest criticism you’ve gotten? A guest reviewer once said, “You tend to write Fiyero as an abusive person”. It wasn’t harsh, just... NOT TRUE. Especially for the story they were reviewing.

35) Do you share your story ideas with anyone else or do you keep them close to your chest? Close to my chest. I’ll share it with the world when I’m ready.

36) Can you give us a spoiler for one of your WIP’s? NOPE! You’ll just have to wait and see! LOL!

37) What’s the funniest story you’ve written? I... really don’t know. My stories all have their funny moments.

38) If you could collab with any other writer on here, who would it be? (Perhaps this question will inspire some collabs!) If you’re shy, don’t tag the blog, just name it. I’m very busy, and collabs aren’t really my thing, but I’m always willing to lend an extra pair of eyes pre-posting.

39) Do you prefer first, second or third person? I’ve written one story in the first person and it was fun to get into the character’s head, but I love third person, cause I like knowing what everyone is thinking. Second person makes me feel a certain way and that don’t really like.

40) Do people know you write fanfiction? IRL, no. It’s not something I bring up over dinner. I’ll talk about my plays and musicals, but not fanfiction. I like keeping my fics for the online peeps and my more personal writings for the RL peeps.

41) What’s you favourite minor character you’ve written? My OC, Princess Hannalyn, from ‘A Royal Romance’. She was so much fun!

42) Song fic - What made you decide to use the song xxx for xxx. I haven’t done a song fic.

43) Has anyone ever guessed the plot twist of one of your fics before you posted it? Not fully, but they’ve had little inklings, but certain details were still a surprise. And I’m not mad about it.

44) What is the last line you wrote? “I don’t want this to be the last time we see each other.”

45) What spurs you on during the writing process? When I’ll have one idea, and it spirals into many others, and when the characters write themselves. It makes it so much easier for me. Sometimes they tell me that they’re about to make a bad decision, and I just go along with it. They need to learn and grow somehow.

46) I really loved your xxx fic. If you were ever to do a sequel, what do you think might happen in it? [Ask me for a specific story]

47) Here’s a fic title - insert a made up title. What would this story be about? [Ask me]

48) What’s your favourite trope to write? I love a good Royalty AU (not fully AU ‘cause of our princey-prince, but still) and Holiday AUs. And I’ve never written a Coffeeshop AU, but I LOVE reading them. I’ll read anything. I’m not picky, and I love to see what ideas others have.

49) Can you remember the first fic you read? What was it about? Yes, and both of them were Gelphies: 1 - “Easier Said Than Done” by mecelphie - It’s part of a long, wonderful series of Elphaba and Glinda together at Shiz and how their lives evolve together and has many lovable OCs. 2 - “The Thropp Diaries” by denpa wave chick saki - It’s first-person Elphaba POV of the book. It expands on lots of mentioned moments and we get to journey through Elphaba’s thoughts.

50) If you could write only angst, fluff or smut for the rest of your writing life, which would it be and why? I’d have to say fluff, so I can get my escape from reality. But it’s hard to write pure fluff without a little bit of conflict.

If you wanna read my stories, they’re all right here: Fae’sFlower

[subtlereferencetomyinterests]

I Taste Honey but I Haven’t Seen the Hive - Chapter Seven

Ao3,   Masterpost,  C.1   C.2   C.3   C.4   C.5   C.6

Relationships: eventual queer-platonic intruality, platonic dlampr.

okay. so. last time we heard anything out of me was *New Years*, Literally, and maybe i should’ve mentioned that I was taking a little hiatus, but oh well. i’m back now and i’m gonna post the last three chapters of this fanfiction as soon as I possibly can (so probably like all of them will be up by tmrw at the latest!!) to make up for my absence. but jokes on you, cuz I did actually finish this thing!!! >:P 

(oh yeah, and there are no italics, thanks to tumblr’s copy/paste bulls//t. i continue to be lazy :3 if anything sounds stilted just imagine that theres an italicized word there and yeah.)

Warnings: cursing, sexual innuendo, discussions of sexuality, misunderstandings, Emotional Conversations, sharing a bed, mild body horror (remus’ existence lol), stress, h/c. 

Word count: 7,967

The hallway was cold, and dark. It had been long-since abandoned of any life, with every door shut and each light dimmed- even Virgil’s. That day- the day of the meeting- had exhausted everyone enough to send them right to sleep mode. 

Everyone except Remus and Patton.

Their heart-to-heart in the kitchen had dragged on a little longer than either had expected, letting night descend fully over the Mindpalace. Patton was the one to notice the time eventually, and drag his less-than-restful friend up the stairs with him- he could tell that the other was dead tired, though. His stubborn determination not to end the conversation didn’t sit well, but Patton couldn’t think what to make of it, and they really did need some sleep. 

They reached Patton’s door first. He stopped in front of it, when Remus tugged his hand back insistently. He turned to him, letting out a confused hum, and was met with a scowl and a sigh.

Remus was looking even more resigned than he had when they first started talking that night. Patton waited, worried. 

“This isn’t, um,” Remus exhaled, ragged around the edges. “This isn’t a pick-up line, okay, and I know that it’ll sound that way and I know that it’s me but. I really don’t wanna be alone tonight.”

Oh. 

Patton’s heart ached- and his heart was big, it took up most of him. He felt the pain spread out from his center and into his fingertips and toes, hot and empathetic. Because how could he hear something like that, and not want to spend the rest of the night doting on the creature in front of him until that voice never sounded so small again, till he was as big and confident as he was meant to be?

“I don’t think I want to be alone, either,” Patton said.

Remus stared, his big scarlet eyes casting a faint glow in the dark. They were wide, cautiously hopeful.

“Yeah?” He muttered.

“Yeah.”

Patton opened the door, and led them both inside.

Remus shuffled around on the other side of the bed, but Patton was still, however much he wanted to squirm.

“Um.”

The movement stopped, and he flushed at the feeling of being watched in the dark. There really was no un-awkward way to say it, was there?

“Remus, since you’re staying, do you- um, do you mind doing me a favor?” 

Remus, little more than a silhouette, propped himself up on his elbow, a tilt to his head. “A favor? Of course, anything for you, Pat,” his words were a purr, and Patton could envision the suggestive smirk on his face in perfect clarity. Patton felt another well of discomfort bubble in his stomach.

“Could you at least wear some clothes, please?” 

There was a beat. Remus laughed, short and good-natured. 

“Yeah, I sorta figured I would. It’s no problem.”

“Thank you,” Patton sighed, relieved. 

“Don’t worry about it,” he paused, and that really would’ve been the end of it, but Patton had learned by then when Remus was about to make a joke. He took a little breath while the words were still clicking together in his head, and a grin crept into his voice. “There’s always tomorrow night to try this clothesless, eh?”

“I’m asexual,” Patton blurted, and he could feel the heat radiating from his face, though he didn’t even know why he was so uncomfortable. It was a joke, Remus was just joking. They were friends and Patton should’ve been used to it- but he’d already gotten so sensitive that night, and jokes like that always hit just a little different than the violent ones or the curses. It must have been a breaking point, or something. 

Remus shifted again, laying on his back. Patton wondered if he’d made things awkward. 

“Oh,” Remus said, “Oh wow, that makes so much sense!”

“It- It does?” Patton sat up, staring at the other with a mix of surprise and relief. Remus blinked up at him, nodding. 

“Well, yeah, that explains why you get so squirmy whenever anybody even implies something to do with sex. I always thought you were just, like, a prude.”

Patton ran his hands over the comforter that pooled around his legs, shrugging. He wasn’t nervous, so much as he was fidgety. “Well, maybe it was some of that, too,” he joked. 

Remus snorted, rolling onto his side and catching one of Patton’s hands in his own. He held it, playing with Patton’s fingers like he was trying to focus. 

“Hey,” he sighed, heavy, “Sorry.”

“Huh? What for?”

“C’mon, you know,” Remus gestured around with his free hand, “All the jokes, and all the times I hit on you, like, graphically. I was kidding, obviously, it was just that you always had the best reactions. If I’d known why, I mean. I don’t know if I’d have actually stopped, but whatever. Different time, different me. I’m stopping now, kay?”

Patton’s eyes went wide. He hadn’t- He wasn’t trying to make Remus stop, that wasn’t fair. He knew how important staying true to himself was to Remus, and if he’d actually managed to guilt-trip any of that away, he didn’t think he’d forgive himself.

“Oh, it’s really okay, I mean- I know you like talking about stuff like that, who am I to say you shouldn’t?”

“You never said that, actually.”

Patton nodded, even if Remus couldn’t see him, and even if he was pretty sure they were on different pages. “Exactly. You shouldn’t go changing just to make me comfortable, I’ll get used to the jokes! I guess I just wanted to know that they were, which, obviously yeah, but… um, I’m bad with knowing what tone is which, sometimes, so-”

“Ugh, Patton,” Remus was laughing, leaning up and grasping tighter around Patton’s hand, with a tone that said plainly: please shut up. Patton did, biting the inside of his cheek. “Look,” Remus huffed, “I know what you’re trying to say, and it’s real sweet that you’re so worried about this, but it’s not exactly like I’m telling you that I’m reinventing myself. I’ll definitely keep saying plenty of horny shit, trust me, I can just drop it with the comments about ya. It wouldn’t even be funny anymore; fucking with people is cool, right, but making someone I actually like feel ‘icky’, or whatever, isn’t really the same thing. It’s no big sacrifice trying to make you feel safer with me, got it?”

Remus’ eyes were on his, glowing with concern. Patton felt his face flush for an entirely new reason, nothing to do with embarrassment.

“You want to make me feel safe?” Patton grinned, just this side of giddy. “That’s a new one.”

Remus made a vague grumbly sound; it shouldn’t have been as cute as it was. “Yeah, okay, so what if I do?”

“It’s okay if you do. It’s sweet.”

“Maybe it is. Besides, you aren’t the only aspec side around,” he shrugged, “I’m not too big on the dating side of things, myself.”

Patton’s smile widened. “Thank you. I mean, for understanding, and… getting me out of my own head about all this.”

“I gotcha,” a claw traced over Patton’s knuckles, idly, “No need for thanks.”

“I’ll give it anyway, you know that.”

Remus snorted. “Mhmmm.”

With the remains of embarrassment finally fading away, Patton yawned, and remembered just how tired he was. He laid himself down finally, relaxing as his back hit the mattress. No sooner after he’d done so, Remus was letting go of his hand in favor of curling around him and setting his head on Patton’s chest. 

Patton would be lying if he said it wasn’t a relief, feeling the other unhesitant to curl up against him still. He looped his own arms around the smaller figure, practically on top of him, and traced patterns against Remus’ back. 

In hindsight, Patton couldn’t remember ever falling asleep so easily. 

The morning after, there was a crisis. A Thomas-crisis, and an emotional one, which set Patton up for a busy, busy day (or morning-through-afternoon, but it was well more than enough work for one day). The one upside to the whole mess was that he didn’t have to deal with it alone, because emotional distress fell neatly into Virgil’s area of expertise as well as his own.

At some point, you’d think they’d get numb to the endless dilemmas every other day, but with each new outing it got clearer and clearer that panic was just a part of life. Most weeks had at least one incident; there would be a mistake at the post office that needed to be worked out in person (which Patton didn’t mind, really, but Virgil hated, and Roman thought was a waste of time), there was an event for a friend of a friend that for some reason they were socially obligated to go to (which no one liked but Roman, who always thought they were one person away from being ‘discovered’), or- the present situation- there were pre-established plans that all the sides had somehow forgotten about until they were shoved into it at the last second.

Patton jolted awake with a gasp, the urgency of his human throwing him out of sleep. It was a full two hours later than he usually woke up, something he would’ve loved to appreciate on any other day. His bed was already empty- the warmth of another person still there, the covers still scrunched, but empty- which did serve to make his morning routine quicker. He dressed with a fervor that he couldn’t even place, manic exhaustion already soaking into him and making plans to stay there all day. It was going to be a rough one, being around people. 

But, Patton knew it wouldn’t be hard to ignore all that, for a little bit at least. There was still a bright side, and that side was Virgil! Who he got to spend all day with! Working, sure, but still- work done with a loved one is never work at all.

“Yeah, I don’t know if that rings true, Pat,” was Virgil’s response to the sentiment, when Patton told him.

“You’re smiling,” Patton said, because he was.

“What?” Virgil covered his mouth, “No, I’m not- shut up.” 

“You believe me, I know you do. You looove me.”

“Says you,” his mouth may have been covered, but the crows feet under his eyes creased more. His shoulders were just a little less tense, too, enough to tell Patton he was right. 

That morning wasn’t great, but, they made it better.

Remus had woken up in a lot of places that were decisively not his bed. The floor? Sure. The imagination? Oh, absolutely. Underneath furniture, on top of furniture, and on counters- anywhere lie-down-able, been there and done that. Just for the fun of it, really, and a nice shock to whoever found him curled up in the sink or beneath cabinets. He was used to a crick in the neck or a splotch of red, rough carpet print on the side of the face. 

So he didn’t really know why, waking up in someone else’s bed, he jolted out of it so quick, he looked like he’d been electrocuted. Or why, after scrambling out of Patton’s arms with whatever carefulness he could manage, he bolted from the scene entirely.

Remus began the slow process of piecing it together after he all but slammed the door behind him, trembling and cursing his way down the hall. He dragged away from Patton’s room and let his back hit the wall, sliding to the floor with a kind of hysteria he could only describe as itchy-vomity-terrifying-amazing. 

He did itch at his skin, he was feeling a bit sick, a bit scared, but he thought he might’ve been grinning anyway, so the description fit well enough. Except, nothing was fitting actually well, right then.

The closeness. The attention. The fact that he’d spent eight hours of sleep getting a full dosage of both those things. The fact that it had been more of both of them than he could remember getting, ever. Of course he’d scrambled away- how else could he react!?

Remus didn’t get overwhelmed. Except, apparently he did! What another fun surprise!

A door creaked open down the hall (thank God not Patton’s). Remus felt the eyes on him, and looked up- manically, he looked well and truly manic.

Logan blinked at him. He looked a lot like an owl in the mornings, Remus noted. One of those smart ones, obviously, not one of the ones that fucks around counting licks on a lollipop. 

Logan cleared his throat. 

“Remus? Is everything alright?” 

Remus shrugged, grinning. “Maybe! Who knows, though, right? It’s a lot, you know?”

Logan did not know, and said as much. Remus only laughed, letting his head hit back against the wall in the process.

He still felt warm, inside and out, after all that cuddling. It was weird, good-weird, but still so new. And, like he said, a lot. He’d felt that kind of warmth before, but definitely not as much- and he knew he needed to distract himself before he went crazy. Or, before his rattrap of a brain ruined the maybe-possibly good feelings for him. 

“Hey, any chance you’re busy today?”

Logan hovered in his doorway for a minute before ultimately deciding to step out, probably determining the interaction as a prolonged one. He didn’t look too put-off about it, though.

“A very high chance,” he said, “But for now I am not. Is there something you need?”

“A distraction.”

“Ah.”

“So, you up for it?” Remus pulled himself up from the floor, popping a few joints. “At least for the morning, yeah, Geek?” 

“Of course,” he smirked, “Provided you can call me by actual name at least once in this conversation.” 

Remus grinned, probably coming off more relieved than he intended. “Eh, we’ll see about that one, Dweeb.”

Logan met him halfway down the hall, not looking at all surprised by the response. He looked, if anything, amused. Remus found himself remembering very abruptly that the two of them got along, were probably friends, and somehow that fact was still novel to him. Or maybe it was the mood. Probably both.

“Well, it was worth a try,” Logan reasoned.

“Oh, sure.”

“What were you thinking we should do, anyway?”

Remus raised his eyebrows suggestively.

“I’m afraid that’s off the table,” Logan told him.

“Aw, fine. Surprise me, then.”

“That will be hard.”

Remus laughed, unsteady and shrill.

“C’mon, I know you’ve got it in ya.” 

Logan smiled, just-nearly-almost mischievous. “Well. I’ll see what I can do.” 

And for just a second, some of the panic slipped away, leaving behind that strange warmth. 

Patton didn’t exactly let Janus know he was coming by. It had been a long day- or, a long five hour period between ten in the morning and three in the afternoon, but still, the idea that there was any day left at all made Patton want to melt into the nearest soft object and never get up. 

When Patton needed to melt, he went to Janus’. Maybe it was the big armchairs; maybe it was the comforting, gooey little white-lies that soaked the atmosphere of his room; maybe it was the fact that his voice was so very easy to fall asleep to. Most likely, at least part of it was because he always seemed to enjoy taking care of people, anyway. 

It was a nice combination, and exactly what was needed. Patton could apologize for not knocking later, ideally when he wasn’t falling asleep where he stood. 

“Janusss,” he groaned, by way of greeting, and promptly collapsed onto the nearest soft surface while the door swung shut behind him. 

Janus blinked at him from across the room, surprise lasting for approximately three seconds. He turned around, and sighed.

“Well, hello to you, too.”

Patton hummed, drearily.

“You look cheery,” Janus quipped, “Anything you’d like to talk about?” 

The question was spoken lightly, but not insincere. Patton lifted his head enough to smile tiredly at the snake. He shrugged, for the room was working it's magic already, as was the easy company to be found there. Stress was easing away, in small bits, evaporating into warm shimmers under his skin. He had no doubt that Janus was doing some of it on purpose, as soon as he’d noticed the mood Patton was in, giving him a blanket of speckled reassurances (which were, as Janus insisted to him time and time again, just a tiny, harmless breed of pleasant lies) in an almost-literal way. 

Most things about the sides’ rooms were like that. Almost-literal; concepts that crept their way into the physical world, if only slightly. Janus was the best at those kinds of things, though. 

“’S just been a tiring day, y’know?” 

Janus sat beside him, toying with some spare yellow strings, weaving and unweaving them almost carelessly. “I do.”

“A tiring night, too,” Patton added, an afterthought, but he found as he said so that it was true. Long in a good way. An impactful way. It felt like something important had happened, something that changed, but he didn't quite know what. It was still just as draining, though.

Janus raised an eyebrow, but he did not pry (even if he most likely wanted to).“So, you’ve come here.”

“Do you mind if I just rest in here for a bit?” He said, as he’d already gotten quite comfortable.

“Why don’t I do you one better?”

Patton hummed confusedly, but Janus had already begun urging him to sit up. The snake waved a hand, filling the room with light, swirling piano music. At once the air seemed to grow fuzzy, spicks and specks of what looked like golden glitter floating around- not unlike from the distortion Patton’s own room gave him when he was happy. Janus smiled down at him, summoning a neat little tea set on a tray and fixing them each a cup of the swirling, caramel-colored liquid. 

Patton sighed happily, taking the teacup he was proffered and thanking the lord for whatever he’d done to deserve a friend like Janus. 

Janus sat beside him, balancing the tea tray on an end table, and let their shoulders bump. He wasn’t a touchy person, exactly, but he allowed for a conservative amount of casual intimacy. Occasionally, and in an unspoken way, but still.

The atmosphere had exactly the intended effect. Patton felt paradisiacal. 

“Gosh, what would any of us do without you?” 

Janus hummed. “You’d most certainly perish.”

Patton laughed, his chest lighter already. 

Remus felt good for about ten seconds after leaving Logan’s room and letting the guy get to work, fresh off the good morning he’d had. Then, very promptly, the weight that the remaining hours of daylight carried dropped onto his shoulders, and he would’ve been perfectly willing to claw his brain out to get a moment of reprieve from the whole barrage of irrational terror worming around in it.

Remus didn’t know why it was so bad that day (well- he had a guess, but thinking about it obviously made it suck worse, so). What he did know was that he needed someone to keep fucking distracting him, and that someone could under no circumstances be Patton.

Luckily, avoiding him wasn’t hard- he was still busy, and Remus had a feeling he’d need a rest once Thomas’ crisis was over, anyway- but that didn’t do much to solve the other half of Remus’ problem.

He needed something big, loud, and most importantly, not solo. He needed someone that could take up a whole room just as easily as himself, with endless energy to bounce back and forth, back and forth, until neither of them would ever worry about anything other than the moment and whatever it was they would do together… 

Oh, god fucking dammit. 

Remus sunk out to the Imagination. No, not his. The opposite half.

He rose up into more than a blank canvas, but less than a finished work; a vibrant world with gaps and white spots. He might’ve taken the time to look around, but- unsurprisingly- his brother was in front of him, accosting him, immediately. Seriously, it was like he’d teleported. 

“What are you doing here?” Roman snapped, his hands, still splattered with ink, landing on his hips. 

“Aw, so now I’m not even allowed to visit my own flesh and blood, and other various parts?” 

Roman scrunched his nose up. “No, you aren’t allowed. This is my room!”

Remus- as he always did when someone said he couldn’t do something- cackled. 

“I’m serious!” Roman whined, “I’m busy!”

Now, he said that, but Remus knew from personal experience that if Roman wanted him gone, he could’ve forced him out without too much issue- or worse yet, attacked him outright. He didn’t seem to be about to spring, though, not looking any worse than annoyed, so Remus happily decided that this interaction fell into the normal-and-healthy-sibling-bickering category instead of the unfortunately familiar would-genuinely-commit-fratricide-if-possible category. 

He grinned. “Yeah, and I’m bored!”

“Not my problem, and you’re still in my room.” 

“What, worried I’ll gunk up all your magic ponies and Yellow Brick Roads, or whatever it is you like to play with around here?”

“Yes, I am!” Roman scowled, but it looked a lot like he was straining his jaw not to laugh. “And you know I don’t make those, you fiend, I made a unicorn once and that was only because Logan wanted one.”

“You’re shitting me if you say that you weren’t the kid who always wanted a pony, Ro.”

“Well, how’s a pony any better than a thestral, which I seem to remember someone getting all excited about when we first read the-books-that-shall-not-be-named?”

“Ooh! Good idea, we should abso-fucking-lutely make those!” Remus wandered past his brother, looking around at the half-finished scene that he’d walked in on. It was sunny, pleasant- all around very vanilla, but there was at least a sense of adventure thrumming under it that gave the place a kick. With some work, it could actually be, like, fun! “Ever see somebody die? Don’t worry, I can help with that.”

Roman turned to him, looking hilariously incredulous with what was happening.

“Um? Excuse me? This is my domain,” he blinked, and a smug smirk crossed his lips. “Which means that you don’t have the power to make anything here! So, ha!”

Oh, right. That made a lot of sense, actually. How had he forgotten that? It wasn’t like this was the first time he’d tried to make something with his brother, right? 

…Wow. That had no business hurting as much as it did.

“Uh- Remus?” 

His head snapped up, a smile with too-many teeth already strained across his face. Remus’ head was scattered enough, coming here wasn’t supposed to make it worse.

“Sure, okay- there’s gotta be some way for us to build stuff together!” 

Roman stared appraisingly at his sibling, apparently thinking before he argued for the one and only time in his life. He tilted his head in confusion, perhaps worry. 

“I- well-” Roman glanced at what he’d been making, and down at his hands. “I’m sure I could, perhaps, let you have power here. Just this once.” He huffed. “It’s my room, right? So there’s no reason why I couldn’t do that, if I wanted.”

“Do you?” 

“Ugh.” Roman rolled his eyes, perfunctorily. “Fine. I don’t know what’s up with you, but I’d rather you be your normal weird-self than… whatever this is,” Roman stuck his hand out, his chin raised like it was a challenge. “Good?”

Remus grabbed his hand (and did not buzzer him, or slime him, even though it would have been so easy- because they were having A Moment and even he could appreciate the sanctity of something like that). 

“Yeah,” he said. “We’re good.”

Roman, as it turned out, was able to tolerate Remus for a whopping six hours, right up until five p.m., and only shooed him away in order to finish the project that he’d more-or-less happily dropped when Remus stopped by. So Roman wasn’t the worst brother in the world, Remus acknowledged. He then resolved to never, under any circumstances, say that to Roman’s face. 

The door to the Imagination shut with a click. The sound matched almost perfectly with another, sharper one down the hall, what Remus recognized as Janus’ door closing. He glanced up with a grin, wondering if he could maybe get Snakey to distract him for a while- only to lock eyes with precisely what he needed distracting from.

Patton smiled at him. He looked tired, relaxed, and raised a hand in some semblance of a wave. It would probably be a great opportunity to unwind together, talk stuff out, and definitely curl into each other on the couch.

Remus wasn’t going to take that opportunity, though.

Remus stared back at Patton for all of three seconds, the grin sliding off his face, before barging through the nearest door and slamming it behind himself. 

Shit. Fuck. What the hell did he do that for? It was just Patton, Remus knew Patton; there was no reason to be jittery enough to bolt from him twice. There was no way Patton wouldn’t think he was mad- which he wasn’t, even if he barely understood why he was losing it, he knew it wasn’t anger. But Patton wouldn’t know that, and he’d cry, probably, and Remus wasn’t sure if he was good enough at comforting people to fix it after. Christ, maybe he couldn’t fix it, maybe he’d still be too keyed up to talk to Pat, even if he started bawling! 

“Hey? What the fuck?”

Remus spun around, and yeah, he could’ve guessed whose room he ended up in without the gravelly voice to give it away, given that little spiral. A surprised-looking Virgil stared up at him, sitting cross-legged on a spiderweb bedspread. 

Remus ignored the thin layer of anxiety still rolling under his skin (now that he could place it), and shrugged, sliding until he sat on the floor.

“Oh, hi,” he said.

“Yeah, hi to you too, but my question still stands:” Virgil clapped his hands together, “What. The fuck?” 

Remus considered a few possible snarky responses, but found that most of them were pretty pathetic. Besides, evading vulnerable situations was more of Janus’ thing, and Remus didn’t want to steal his bit. 

“I’m hiding like a little bitch, so don’t kick me out, or I’ll maul you.”

Virgil’s eyebrows went up, but the surprise in his face was being replaced, slowly, by confused resignation. “Okay, cool. Why here, and why me?”

“First door.”

“Yeah, that’s about my luck,” he blew his bangs out of his face, “So like, you’re not gonna go anywhere else?”

Remus thought about it, but it was an easy choice. If he was gonna whine to anybody about something like this, he decided, it’d probably be Virgil. Virgil was good with fear, he was good with Patton, and he was good at making fun of shit if a conversation got too serious. 

“Nah. Sorry, Emo Boy, but I’ve already annoyed Logan and my dipshit brother today. Looks like it’s your turn!”

“What about Janus?”

“Eh, he’s a live-in therapist for the rest of you already. I think I’ll give him the day off.”

Virgil rolled his eyes, sighing with all the exasperation of a teenage burnout and not a thirty-year-old metaphysical humanoid.

“Okay, okay- and why’s Patton off the table? He, like, actually enjoys helping people,” Virgil glanced down, scuffing the carpet with the side of his foot. “He’s good at it, too.”

“Yeahhhh,” Remus locked his teeth together, inhaled through them, “About that.”

“What, aren’t you two all close now?” Virgil frowned, “I fuckin’ saw you guys at the meeting yesterday, you were so on top of each other, I feel like I forgot that you were two separate sides,” to anybody who didn’t know him, the way he talked about it would sound harsh. Remus, however, knew exactly how soft Virgil really was- the fucking poser- and that that shit? That was pure encouragement, raw as a bloody, bloody steak. 

Which, of course, only made Remus wince again.

He flopped sideways onto the floor, groaning. “Yeah, we’re close. That’s- I think that might be the problem?” That sounded right, almost, but just wrong enough to feel icky and annoying. “Ugh, I don’t know. So I just ran!”

There was a beat.

“Wait a second,” Virgil’s voice was tight- oh that bitch, he was laughing! “You’re hiding from Patton?”

Remus huffed. Okay, so maybe it was a little funny, he could appreciate that- but! He was still upset about it!!

“I mean, what has he done to scare you off?” Virgil pressed, “Too many compliments? Did he hug you too hard? I know the dude can be a lot sometimes, but-”

“Okay, ok-ay,” Remus couldn’t help it, he managed a laugh at it, too. “It’s ridiculous! It’s fucking ridiculous and he’s not even the problem!”

“Then what is the problem?” Virgil was snickering, “And don’t say that it’s you, dude. At least one of us around here has to not hate himself to hell and back, and you’ve defended that title for too long to lose it,” he cleared his throat right after he said it, sitting up straighter and trying to look like he hadn’t just been laughing like a huge dork. “Not that I’m, like, worried about you or anything.”

“Aw, you so are,” Remus stared up at the ceiling, grinning despite the ache in his chest. “But no, it’s not that. He thinks I’m awesome and he’s right, so don’t worry.”

Virgil leaned over him, staring upside-down at Remus. He squinted.

“Hey, this a serious problem?”

“I guess so. You can joke about it, though.”

“Cool. Um,” Virgil pulled away. Remus sat up, watching the trait cross one leg over the other, flip them, then tap his knee one-two-three-etc. times. He chewed on his lip. The whole nine yards of a classic Focused-Virgil Face. “Okay. You can tell me about it, seriously. I’ll try to help, or whatever.”

Remus blinked at him.

“Don’t- Jesus- don’t make a big deal out of it, dude-”

“Oh, I am.”

“I don’t even have a choice, okay, you’re the one who-”

“You’re so sweet, Virgey!”

“Remus, I swear to God, repeat that to anyone and I…” 

Virgil trailed off. Remus pouted at him, dramatically, his eyes practically glowing with mischief. “C’mon, aren’t you going to threaten me?”

“I was, and then I remembered that you’re like, actually into that kinda stuff, so. No. Nope, I’m good.”

“Fine,” he shrugged, “Looks like you’re resigned to just hearing about my feelings, instead!”

Virgil rolled his eyes again- of course he did- but there was no hiding the way he went quiet, patient, you could even call it attentive.

It was an offering, one that Remus didn’t hesitate to take. 

Patton left Janus’ room in a good mood.

He was in a considerably less good mood when, as soon as he’d left, Remus saw him and scrambled away like Patton was about to attack him where he stood- wide-eyed with fear and everything.

Patton swayed in the hallway for seconds after, uncertain about a lot of things suddenly. 

The room Remus had run into had definitely been Virgil’s, not his own, and for a moment Patton entertained the idea of just going up to knock. He dropped that thought quick, realizing that if he really wasn’t wanted, then he definitely didn’t want to confirm that he wasn’t wanted.

He might have gone back to Janus- Janus was smart, Janus knew how to explain things and solve problems and comfort people- but that was scrapped, too. He’d taken up plenty of the snake’s time already, firstly, and secondly… No, yeah, Patton already knew just who he needed to see for something like this. 

Logan set aside his laptop as soon as Patton walked into the common room, a surprisingly perceptive gesture for someone who claimed to be bad with feelings. Or maybe Patton had just gotten rusty at hiding them.

“Hi,” he greeted, wobbly.

“Hello,” Logan said, “You look upset.”

Patton stared at the wall just above his friend’s head, and nodded.

“Can I help?”

He paused. It was a bad habit- one of many!- but feeling unwanted by one side made him wonder if, maybe, he was unwanted by everyone. The thought formed a lump in his throat and had guilt pooling in his gut, but this was Logan. His best friend, the person he had gone to because he always knew just where he stood with him. If Logan didn’t want to help- no, because he always wanted to- if he couldn’t handle helping, then he would tell Patton that. He always did.

“I think Remus is upset with me,” Patton blurted it out quickly, just so he didn’t have to hear them. Logan vanished his laptop at once, gesturing to the spot beside him on the sofa. Patton sat with him, smiling feebly.

“Has he said anything of the sort?”

“No,” Patton picked at the sleeve of his sweater, “He didn’t really have to. He kind of… ran away from me?”

Logan’s eyes widened behind his frames, almost imperceptibly. “I see.”

“I don’t even know what I did,” Patton flushed with the admission, because of just how true it was. He had no idea what he did, and still he felt blame settling over him like a well worn blanket, and all that he could do was hope it wasn’t as bad as the last time. “I feel like I should know this stuff by now, shouldn’t I?”

There was a pause, as Logan processed the words carefully, seemed to turn them over in his head. 

“Be careful not to jump to conclusions, Patton. He typically freely expresses how he is feeling at any given time, so even if his actions seem to say otherwise, it’s entirely possible that he’s not upset with you,” Logan smiled reassuringly. “I find that most of his actions are meaningless. He’s a very weird creature.”

Patton managed to laugh at that. Logan leaned their shoulders together, a little pride flashing in his eyes, as he continued. “He did seem to be ‘out of it’, in a manner of speaking, when we spoke earlier today. It would make sense if that had worsened over the past few hours, and now he’s just particularly flighty. All in all, I wouldn’t read too much into it, if I were you.”

Patton nodded, resolutely not mentioning that they’d spent the night together, however relevant that was. He knew it would sound paranoid to imply that their intimacy had backfired, or come too quick- because Patton was paranoid, and certainly a little neurotic, and the less he voiced it the better. 

Instead, he followed the advice he didn’t believe, and let himself rest against his friend. Logan had laced their fingers together; it wasn’t as comforting as it usually was. 

Logan was only so touchy when it was for the sake of others, and almost always that ‘other’ was Patton. A fact that made the needy trait feel amazingly special most of the time, but on nights like that… More than anything, he felt greedy.

“I’ll ask him about it,” Patton promised, because he knew that was what Logan would suggest (even if the idea made him more than a little dreadfilled). “Maybe I overwhelmed him. He’s been cuddly, so I thought…” Patton shook his head, bile hitting the back of his throat as the realization collapsed upon him. “That’s probably it. I must have took it too far.”

Logan didn’t pry, but Patton could feel his concern mount just as well as he could see the frown on his face.

“Talking to him will be the best course of action,” he said plainly. “For the time being, though,” he released Patton’s hand, wrapping his arm loosely around Patton’s waist and leaving it there. “It might be beneficial for you to receive more reassurance. Is this alright?”

“Yes,” Patton ducked his head, knowing full well how obviously relieved he sounded, “Thank you.”

“There’s no need to thank me, I’m happy to help,” Logan told him, and he had no doubt that it was true. Still, it always surprised him anyway- and that at least was a good thing about a friend who was so reserved. The pleasant surprises.

Patton sat up enough to rest his head on top of Logan’s, a position that was almost but not quite cuddling.

“I sincerely hope,” Logan muttered, “That everything will be alright for you.”

Whether he was speaking only about the Remus situation or not was unclear.

“Me too.”

“If it’s any consolation, it’s very difficult to stay upset with you, if he truly is so. In my experience, at least.”

Patton sighed. “Thanks, buddy.”

“Of course. Your happiness is-... you, are very important to me, and I can only hope that you’ve made a friend that values you as much as I do.”

Patton knew what he meant by it. Both he and Logan were acutely aware of how different they were, and how little they matched with each other. Patton couldn’t understand him- not wanting to be showered in love, enjoying silence and a little bit of alone time, needing space. He knew that Logan didn’t get him, either- didn’t know why he cried all the time, or why nothing ever seemed to fix him for good, or why he said so many things that went without saying. They still struggled with each other’s languages, sometimes, but they’d gotten miles and miles better with it over the years. Sometimes Patton thought that the only way they’d become so close was sheer willpower, pushing past each misunderstanding and argument just because they liked the challenge of it. Determination was always a common thread between them, whatever differences they had.

They had to have boundaries, then. Logan might not hold Patton on his worst days, but he’d give him notes and gifts and bring him water, food, things that he neglected for himself. Patton didn’t have any of the right words to talk Logan down when things got bad, but he was always there to cheer him back up when he was ready again. Neither of them understood each other, and maybe they never would, but they cared. Even if they couldn’t be what the other needed, they cared, and that was all they had to do. 

So even if Logan couldn’t fix things, Patton thought, he still did a hell of a good job patching them up. 

“Hey. Hey!”

Patton turned around with a jolt, his fingers going tight in the blanket about his shoulders. How long he’d been downstairs, he didn’t know- but he knew that he was really, very tired, and now was left blinking and confused at the person accosting him with so much energy. 

“Um, hi,” Patton tried.

Remus had run up to him at once, and was just as suddenly seizing both of his hands. Patton might have taken a moment to appreciate the touch, but with just one sentence that positivity crumbled:

“I need to talk to you.”

Patton shoved a plastic smile onto his face. He always felt a little icky to be faking it, but with Remus, the shame was especially thick. Still, it was only instinct. 

“Okay.”

Patton opened the door; the Duke marched in without waiting for invitation, and he followed. 

Dread dripped down his spine like melting ice cubes. This is fine, Patton told himself firmly, once they were both sitting feet apart on the bed. He refused to think too hard about what the distance meant- if it meant anything at all, or if he was only being ridiculous.

“Sorry about today,” Remus began, “Really. I was freaking out for the stupidest fucking reason. You’ll laugh when I tell you!”

Patton didn’t laugh, but he smiled a little more wholly. If Remus was upset with him, the apology must’ve meant at least some of that had faded away. Probably.

“It’s okay, Mess,” the nickname rolled off his tongue easily. Remus grinned at him, but it was somehow more manic than usual.

“I probably got you all worried over nothing, bolting on you before you could wake up- and then again earlier, right?”

There was a pause, as Patton tried to decide if the question was rhetoric or not. When the silence stretched on uncomfortably, he found himself nodding. 

Remus huffed out a breath, rocking back and staring up at the ceiling. “Yeah, I- I’m still working at the whole self-improvement thing, ya know? That probably doesn’t make it better, but- I’ve never really had a reason to try and be, uh, considerate. Janus never really cared if I was a bitch, and nobody else ever mattered, and that- yeah, that’s kind of what I wanted to talk about.” 

His voice was raspy, low and thick in a way that it almost never was. Patton tipped his head to the side, confused. Remus looked- and sounded- awkward, an expression that was not at home on his face. 

“Wait, um- so it wasn’t anything I did? You’re not upset with me?”

Remus looked at him like he was crazy (ironic, that).

“Upset with you?” He crowed, “Why the fuck would I be upset with you?”

Patton flushed; he laughed embarrassedly, or maybe in relief; he toyed with the sleeves of his sweater.

“I didn’t really- I don’t know, but I was worried that I’d, um, overstepped some boundaries last night, and maybe made you uncomfortable.”

He was only kind of looking at his friend, from out the corners of his eyes. It was still easy to see the way Remus went from confused to amused, and then burst into cackles.

“You- You- Me? Morey, please, it takes a lot to make me uncomfortable- if that’s even possible, actually- and you sure as shit haven’t figured out how to pull it off yet. Sugar, I asked to stay with you!”

The relief flooded Patton all in a rush, and he felt himself finally relax. With Remus laughing and joking and being his usual (sweet, impressively sweet, surprisingly so) self again, it all started seeming a little silly. Remus must’ve seen him coming untense, folding down the same way accordion-pressed paper sprawled out when it was released from a bored student’s hand, because his gaze went warm, like something had finally clicked into place in his head. A problem solved, and what a wonderful solution it had come to- that’s what the look said. 

Patton met the smile just as brightly when the Duke shifted over some of the distance between them, taking up both of Morality’s hands in his own yet again. 

“Well, since it wasn’t something I did,” Patton said, “Then what was the actual problem?”

Remus didn’t look too upset at the question, but he was glancing down, up, sideways- his pupils flitted around the room without really touching on anything for too long; it wasn’t often that he was so obviously thinking something through. His fingers flexed, face a little pink, and he hesitated before answering:

“Okay, it’s like I said, right? I don’t- I’ve never needed to try to be anything for anybody before. I mean that I never wanted to do things in a conform-y way, obviously, but, I never wanted to be considerate, either,” he smirked down at their tangled hands, shrugging. “I don’t think I’m doing too bad for a first try, to be honest- but that’s not the point, the point is- this is… new.”

Patton opened his mouth, reassurances rushing to the tip of his tongue before he was hastily shushed.

“No, look, there’s a difference between being a pushover and just being fucking nice to the people you care about. That’s the problem- or I thought it was a problem, in my dipshit lizard-panic brain this morning- right? I’ve never wanted to do anything for people, because I didn’t need them anyway. I figured I didn’t, I guess, cuz I could survive without ‘em- it wasn’t like I had a choice, but I got on fine. Not to be too… I don’t know, pathetic? Who cares, but- I never knew anything different.”

Patton’s eyes went wide and watery, like the blue of his irises were soaking into everything else and leaking, leaking, leaking. He was squeezing Remus’ hands a little too tight, certainly, and he just wanted to hug him so bad- but despite his words, Remus didn’t even seem to need it. He looked back at Patton, huffed a sigh, looking just plain amused.

“So this hit me when I was talking to Virgil, about ten minutes ago,” he started, “That I woke up today, with you, and I had this thought like… Fuck, I don’t ever wanna move again. I could starve and then start to decompose and probably rot into bloody mush, but I’d probably still be perfectly happy- which is weird, because starvation is easily one of the boringest ways to die, I could go out so much cooler- but, it was more the fact that I was with you, and uh. So, so I thought that- which is so dumb and sappy- and it surprised me so bad that I just ran. And after I had, I was so freaked out, I didn’t even remember why for!”

He took a deep breath, something that he hadn’t done for that entire ramble. Patton got the sense he still wasn’t finished though, and waited patiently.

“I never needed anybody caring about me for me to be okay- the screaming and the fleeing and all that was fine, it was still a reaction. But I think I just realized that I couldn’t go back to that, now.

“Because of you. I knew I liked you, but it never clicked that things would probably suck without you by this point. More than that, I guess- it hit me that just because I can take care of myself, it doesn’t mean that it doesn’t fucking blow. That I don’t- I don’t want to be so independent again, okay? That I don’t wanna be alone anymore.”

And he couldn’t help it at all; Patton did hug him, then. He pulled him against his chest as soon as he noticed the words going choppy, choked, and halting. He let go of Remus’ hands, in favor of tangling his fingers in the Duke’s hair and carding through it.

Remus met the embrace with just as much fervor, curling up into the bigger trait. Yet somehow, he wasn’t crying yet.

“Hey, hey, I’m alright,” he murmured, “I mean, don’t let go, obviously- but I’m okay. I had all day to panic! Which I definitely did, by the way, because my whole worldview got screwed over. Finally know how you feel, I guess,” He was joking, Patton could hear his smile. He laughed. “But I got it out of my system, and ya know what I realized after that?”

Patton hummed attentively, letting Remus pull back just enough to see his face.

“I said, ‘okay, I’m processing that, and it doesn’t matter.’ It doesn’t matter because I only realized that maybe I need people once I already had them, and- no offense- but you don’t really seem like the abandoning type. The opposite, that’s what you are.”

Patton beamed. 

“Of course not,” he swore, pressing the words out as though intensity alone could make them more true, more pure. “Never, not ever.”

“Good,” Remus said, “Cuz I’m hanging on to ya, Pat. As long as I can.”

Chapter Eight

Taglist: @shrimp-crockpot @glitter-skeleton-uwu @donnieluvsthings @intruxiety @thefivecalls @did-he-just-hiss-at-me @gayformlessblob 

[cthomashoodstory]

Best Years but Not in the Same Way (20)

Previous Part

sorry guys i took so long to write this chapter. i hope u guys still waiting for it :)

Masterlst

-

You were sitting on the car with Calum, Michael, Luke, Ashton and Andy and we were going to the hotel after we arrived at Airport on Osaka, Japan. Yes, you’re part of the Meet You There Tour as a special guest. It was a very last minute decision for you and the boys because what was happened back then when Justin got enganged and it affected your work.

It was Mike’s idea. He was talking to 5SOS manager and also the boys to added you to the tour because you got so distracted since July 7 aka Justin’s engagement day and it really affect your work at studio. You were more silent, daydream, less eating and Mike was so worried about you. The band and manager agreed to featured you to be part of the tour and honestly at first you were embarrassed and ashamed of yourself because it was all true, you were distracted about something you should not have, your performance wasn’t that good and you were a burden for them. But the more you thought of it the more you realized that you need a getaway from this situation. You need a fresh start and also you’ll be with Calum 24/7 and it is what you need right now. But you felt bad to them especially Calum because you were here because you had a ‘problem’ and if you didn’t have it you wouldn’t even be here.

They were filming for their tour documentaries vlog and they were talking but you didn’t paid attention to it. You rather put your headset on and looked at the window so they won’t care about you being there. You felt so jet lagged because it’s 7 A.M on Japan time.

“Hey Saara you good?” Luke asked you and you nodded. And then Andy turned the camera to you. “So what’s your first impression of us?” Luke asked you again and all of them were laughing including you. “I mean Japan, your first time right?”

“Yeah,” you put your headset to your sling purse. “I don’t know i just got here all i see was airport and highway and we haven’t arrived at hotel, I haven’t seen how was the city, the food, the people, the venue, so my first impression of you guys is,” you looked at the camera and gave a thumbs down and we all laughed together.

After an hour, finally the team arrived at hotel and checked in. You got a room for yourself even it’s not that big compared to others, since the rest of the team was sleeping on a room with 2 people, you gladly you didn’t pair with other people.

You were sitting at the bed and someone knocked on your door. You opened it and you saw Calum stood there holding a paper bag. “Can i come in?” You nodded and let him in. “I ordered coffee and a cupcake for you. Here.” He gave the paperbag and you put in on a table.

“Thank you, Cal.” You sat on the bed alongside with him. “You don’t have to do that. I could buy it by myself. But thank you for always care about me.”

He grinned. “Anything for you, Bar.” “You coming with us? To our pop up store?”

You shook your head. “No, I’ll better stay on hotel.”

“C’mon, it will be fun to have you there with us. We’ll travel around after we visit the store. We will have lunch somewhere and sushi? We’ll eat sushi like we did in LA but this is fresh because we eat in the origin place.” He convinced you so hard but you couldn’t go with him.

You smiled. “I’d love to, Cal. But I’d rather stay here today than going out. As much i love being here with all of you, especially with you, i felt guilty i felt ashamed of myself about what happened. I wouldn’t be here if something didn’t affect my work. I would be still on the studio with Mike, Julia and Tranter. So please, let me stay here, okay?” You hold his left hand.

“Okay, then i’ll stay with you today. I’m gonna tell the others.” He got up and walk to the door but you hold his hand.

“No,” you said jt with a high tone. “No Cal,” you repeated again with a slow tone. “You have to go, it’s your pop up store, it’s your schedule to meet your fans. Don’t worry about me. You can call me or text me okay?” He finally understood and hugged you. Then he walked our from your room.

-

It’s 1 A.M in Japan and you were on the hotel room resting after a tired show on Zepp Tokyo venue. The audience was so hyped and energic. You were the special guest on the tour and you sang three songs which was Lie To Me, since you were added to be part on the tour unexpectedly, the band and you agreed to recorded your own verse of Lie To Me and added the new part for the tour. The other songs was Why Won’t You Love Me and Valentine. You didn’t really sing a verse on Valentine song, you were just sang a chorus together with them while playing piano part. You really had to learn piano within a month and you really tried your best. And 2 days show on Japan was incredible and it was so amazing for you. it’s been 2 years since the last time you were singing on a tour stage and it was Justin’s Purpose Tour when you and him sang Cold Water, Major Lazer single featuring Justin and you. You felt so nervous yet so excited to be on stage again, singing and interacting with fans.

Honestly, on both Osaka and Tokyo shows, while you were on stage, you couldn’t take your eyes off of Calum. He looked so happy while playing bass, singing, and he also keep his eyes on you while you were singing. You felt happy whenever he’s happy and the source of his happiness is you.

You closed your eyes and tried to sleep but you can’t. You felt tired but but your brain told you the otherwise. And now you saw the clock and it’s 2 A.M.. and at 8 A.M you and the team have to fly back to Los Angeles before came to New Zealand to continued the show. Ugh you really hate when you couldn’t sleep when there’s a big event.

You got up from your bed and changing into casual clothes because you decided to out from the hotel and walked around the city. That was the last thing you ever thought.

You closed your hotel room door and you startled because on the next door, you saw Calum also closed his room door.

“Hi,” he greeted you nervously. But he grinned afterwards. He looked so fine even he only wears his hoodie combined with his leather jacket.

“Hi…,” you greeted him back. “Where you going? It’s midnight and aren’t you tired?” You asked him a silly question that everyone knew the answer.

“I’m going out for a walk, I couldn’t sleep. And what about you? Where you going? Aren’t you tired and supposed to sleep?” We both laughed because he imitated your question.

“Yeah me neither. I couldn’t sleep even though my body is tired and i guess we have the same ‘agenda’, so, let’s get out?”

He nodded and we walked out together from the hotel. You walked alongside with him and kinda follow him anywhere he walked because you didn’t know this city and he’s been visiting this city like 4 or 5 times, he said.

Both of you walked down the street without saying anything. You were busy with your thoughts and perhaps he was too. Well actually this moment was awkward enough for you to talk to him. Like, how you felt being tour with him after what happened with you? Lol.

“So how’s your day? You like being tour with us?” He finally started the conversation.

You grinned. “Of course. In fact, i love being tour with you all. I love being here with you.” You looked at the ground because you knew your face is red. “I want to apologize to you… for what happened. For the reason why i am here. I admitted that I’m still stuck at the past, i admitted I’m still hurt by the fact someone is moved on, but I’m trying hard to let it go, I’m trying to moved on even though I’m struggling at the process, I’m still doing it. And I’m glad that you’re here with me during the process. And if you’re willing to wait longer, i would appreciated it.”

You put your both hand on your jeans pocket and slightly you looked at him. He seems nervous and yet he didn’t say anything.

“I know moving on is the hardest thing to do, and I’m glad you’re trying to do it.” He looked at you with a genuine smile. “Can’t wait till the day we’re… you know.” He laughed and so were you.

You felt a lil bit freezing since you only wear long sleeve and not a jacket. And suddenly Calum pulled out his jacket and gave it to you.

“Hey, there’s a 24/7 store, should we go there?” Asked him. You nodded and we walked together. And suddenly he gave his left hand to you. “Want to hold it?”

You laughed and hold his hand.

-

To be continued.

Next Part

[randomuniverses]

RWBY Volume 6 Crew Commentary Notes!

I just got the Volume 6 Blu Ray and I'm going to be watching the crew's commentary! Kerry was talking with a few others as well as Miles after chapter 1. I wrote what I found interesting or important:

Chapter 1:

They took out the blood at the White Fang Headquarters but had to add it back in later

The train station was the first new set of the season

They used Houdini for crowd shots this season

Showing what's in the bag RWBY got for Yang is planned for next season

On each boba cup lid (from the food in the background of the train station scene) has the RWBY chibi characters

Originally they planned Ilia to wear a kimono. Also a hint to seeing her again!

Kerry's mom wants him (Neptune) to be in the show more

The whole train set is a circle track

The Grimm manticore design was from an artist from the RWBY subreddit! Kerry saw it and he loved it and he contacted her to hire her.

There was an inside joke for the audio team where Dee dies it sounds like the track says "Oh Dee..."

Dee and Dudley barely graduated from their academy

There was originally going to be a closer shot of Salem in the OP but they wanted to keep the mystery about who she was

Chapter 2:

They put in some lines from the house (what Nora says) that were a response to the criticism from Volume 5 about them staying there too long

Nora was originally going to tell Blake everything she needed to know with some whiteboards on the train, but they decided to just show the house where things are explained

The footsteps in the snow were made using nulls in After Effects. They explain the process which is pretty interesting.

Oscar struggling was done in mocap

Lil Miss Malachite is an allusion for Little Miss Muffett (duh) and turns out she is the mother of the Malachite Twins

The Malachite Twins went to live in Vale and be bad guys

Jinn's hair is separated/split more than a normal character's. Same with Summer Rose

Chapter 3:

Salem's story one of the first things ever written for RWBY

They really wanted a character's story to revolve around 'happily ever after' then a few steps after that, so Salem was the perfect character for that

Originally the Lost Fable was chapter 3 and 4, but they combined them into one

The whole episode was mocapped in a single weekend

The crew has a Ruby body pillow prototype that's used during mocap

The Gods are inspired from the Gods of Greek Mythology

They want to show more natural wildlife in RWBY, but due to budget constraints it's hard

The video game Brutal Legend inspired the scene where Salem throws herself into the pool of Grimm

Originally the Gods were closer to human size but were scaled up

The story structure for the episode took inspiration from Harry Potter and Game of Thrones

Originally there was going to be more dialogue from the main cast, but they decided against it

They were originally had Salem look like her current form (well coloring wise), but decided to remove the red veins she has so she looked less spooky

The toy dog one of the children has is a Wizard of Oz reference

Jinn was meant to be an objective outside observer but also a storyteller

The children for one of Oz's reincarnations have silver eyes (confirmed)

Chapter 4:

They were excited to explore Qrow's alcoholism past it just being a joke

Hazel is the most compassionate of the villains

Salem knows how to manipulate people and has different methods for motivations for each of her lieutenants

For example she doesn't have to say that many mean things for Tyrian to take it to heart because he is so loyal

She also knows just how fearful Emerald is of her

Chapter 5:

Neo has begun to evolve her semblance, as shown in the fight

Neo wasn't originally planned to be in this Volume, but was decided when they thought of what they could do better to make Cinder's storyline better and for when Cinder gets to Atlas they thought her having a partner was cool

Brunswick Farm was another idea they had since the very beginning

The Apathy fit so well in this volume because the characters are at a low point

Blake doesn't always get the nuances of relationships and makes a misstep (when Yang and Blake talked and she told Yang she would protect her)

Chapter 6:

The Apathy came from an image of a horrifying scarecrow and they came up with the idea of a grimm that wasn't physically formidable. As well as a planet from the movie Serenity where everyone fell to sleep and died, and a short story about depression and not wanting to do anything

The Apathy work through proximity but if they see you their effect gets even worse. But you can get it jolted out of the apathy for a little while if you are startled

The artist that made the Apathy was the same one that made the Manticore

Maria is colorblind, which was evident in the episode when we learn she couldn't tell Ruby's eye color immediately

Seeing the burning Apathy, Qrow realizes that he almost let everyone get killed and now starts to hate himself (his depression changes)

Chapter 7:

Them having a restriction for how long fights could be (because fights are expensive) led to Miles thinking of a fight that had to last 60 seconds (and Tock)

Maria's weapon and use of dust was inspired from the God of War reboot as well as Marvel's Thor

Maria was originally from Volume 5 but they had to take her out because it was hard to balance out all the storylines

Originally Maria was going to have a cat, and Qrow was supposed to find her in his search for Hunstman

The Arc siblings are all a color of the rainbow, with one set of twins. Saphron is orange.

The toy Adrien is playing with is foreshadowing to the plane and the Leviathan

Chapter 8:

Only Cordovin's guards are so goofy (compared to the rest of Atlas guards), and Cordo is considered a nuisance. This was a job they thought she could do well without bothering anyone

Kerry wanted an old lady fight in the show, so he got one

The Old Lady in the Show was something Monty thought of. The boot is the foot of a giant mech. And the giant mech was originally going to be at the end of V2

Butterflies are normally not out in the winter but this is Remnant ;)

Chapter 9:

Miles likes to think of Tyrian as one of the most insightful villains. He is really good at observing people and knows how to take them apart mentally and physically

This is where they said this is the first time we see Mercury and Emerald being vulnerable to each other (I didn’t include this earlier, sorry!)

They say they’ll never confirm who the Red Haired Woman is, but they said use your brains lol

Looking up at Pyrrha and seeing the airship fly by made Jaune think of the idea to steal one

Chapter 10:

Adrian's crying is not a semblance, that's just comedy

They pitched Jaune's voice down when he says "Roger" so he can sound more serious

Originally there was going to be another episode (episode 14t) where we would see Atlas and Mantle. But they didn't want to end on that because it would require a ton of new assets because of the buildings and the people wearing different clothes

The next season will start with a bang

The Iron Giant was a reference for the mech

Chapter 11:

The mech fight was the most effects-heavy of the fights this season

Blake has always had the scar on her body since the new outfit, but it has been hard to see until her jacket comes off

Yang hitting Adam with her bike was thought of early on in the scripting process

Chapter 12:

A lot of talk about how the animations were made and such

This season had a core fight team that animated all the fights

The way Adam dies is apparently similar to how something in Nier: Automata plays out. Kerry has only played an hour of the game so he did not know that was a thing

But Nier: Automata was actually referenced for the mech fight (the mechanics of how the fight would work) since a robot was involved in the first boss fight.

Shots from the Adam and Yang fight were similar to those from Naurto, but that was also a coincidence

They called the Leviathan Levi in the script because it was easier to type

Chapter 13:

They considered Adrian being a very young baby, but later changed him to be a toddler

Gurren Laggan was another reference used for this part (haven't seen that anime but it was referenced when the mech drills the Leviathan)

They really wanted to make sure we could hear liquid in Qrow's flask

Salem is no longer willing to confine herself to a room, and is going to start being more active by creating her army of minions

[ak47stylegirl]

Sick Days - Chapter 5

Okay, chapter 5 is here! Virgil and Gordon are getting the spotlight this time 😄 But don’t worry, I will be getting back to Alan in the next chapter, I’m not done with him yet... 😈😁😅 (Someone needs to hide him from me, lol..) 

I hope you guys enjoy this chapter!

Part 1/ Part 2/ Part 3/ Part 4 of fic.

————

Gordon pov

Three o’clock, it was his favourite time of day, he thought with a grin as he waited at the school’s pick-up zone with his school bag. It was the crazy rush hour, the pickup zone filled with kids, young and old.

Younger kids were running about and playing with each other, some kids were getting picked up, others were taking on their phones or waiting for a bus. Teachers were trying to keep everyone under control, making sure no one ran onto the road and in front of a moving car.

He usually would have Allie waiting with him, they would talk about anything and everything. Share a funny joke, plan a prank, anything...but today he didn’t have his little partner in crime with him because the kid had gone home sick.

They had pulled him out of class to tell him that Virgil was only picking him up today, that his brother had gone home sick. But they didn’t tell him how sick the kid was, just that he went home sick with some kind of cold.

It couldn’t be that bad, surely? Alan didn’t seem that sick this morning. Though he’ll admit, the kid had been acting a bit weird this morning…

He grinned as he spotted his brother’s bright green pickup truck drives into the school’s entrance. That car was probably one of the most well-looked after cars there was, his brother taking great pride in his car. He swears his brother is in love with that green machine...

“Heya Virg!” He grinned up at Virgil as he threw his school bag into the back of the truck, opening the front passenger side door. “What took you so long?” He asked with a grin as he jumped into his seat. “I was dying of old age over there..”

Virgil shook his head with a slight chuckle, “Hello to you too, Gordon…”

There was a smudge of car oil on Virgil’s cheek, unnoticed by the Apprentice mechanic and volunteer firefighter, which was hilarious, he thought with smicker as he closed his door, doing his seat belt up.

Virgil looked at him suspiciously, not liking the look on his face. He gave Virgil an innocent smile, which admittedly just made Virgil more suspicious. “Well...did you have a good day, Gordo?” Virgil asked as he indicated into the main school traffic, away from the pick-up zone.

“Meh, it was okay, I guess..” he shrugged as he leaned back into his seat, his uniform getting all wrinkled. Not that he really cared, he hated the thing. It was so bland and boring, plus uncomfortable at times. “Would have been better if swimming practice wasn’t cancelled..”

“Why was it cancelled?” Virgil questioned as he tapped the steering wheel, waiting for the car in front of them to move. School time traffic was always the worst, and they haven’t even gotten out of the school’s grounds yet!

“The swim teacher called in sick, and the substitute teacher was sick as well, so no swimming for me..” He pouted, crossing his arms across his chest. “Like how am I going to win the Olympics if I don’t practice my swimming?”

Virgil sighed softly with a small smile, “You got plenty of time to practice kiddo, you’re not even sixteen yet..” and would not be for at least a couple more years, and the age limit for entering the Olympics was sixteen and older... “But I'll take you to the local pool on the weekend if you want?”

“You would?!” he grinned, bouncing up like an excited puppy. “You’re the best Virg! When I win gold, I’ll pay for you to go to the best art college there is! Or whatever college you want to go to really…”

“You don’t need to do that Gordy..” Virgil smiled at him, looking pretty touched. Virgil turned his attention back on the road, traffic starting to move again and before long they were on the main road. “I’m fine with just being an apprentice mechanic, it's enjoyable work, and it brings money in..”

“But I thought you wanted to study art or something?” He asked, looking at his brother in confusion. “But went with the apprenticeship instead because we needed the money?”

“Well, that's not the only reason, but yes, money was a factor, unfortunately..” Virgil sighed softly as he drove the car around a corner, “I would love to study art or even engineering, but as you said, we don’t have the money to spend on that…”

Virgil’s grip on the steering wheel tightened momentarily before loosening again. “And honestly? It’s not that big of a deal Gordy, I’m fine with it..” Virgil smiled at him, “I'd rather you guys get your education unhindered by expenses and stuff...”

“Yeah well...the offer still stands,” he said as he shifted in his seat, looking out the car window. “I win gold, you go to art school or engineering school or whatever..” He waved his hand lazily in Virgil’s direction, trying to seem like he didn’t really care about it, but when in truth, he did.

“I’ll hold you to that then..” Virgil chuckled, only half-joking.

It was quiet in the car for a bit after that, Virgil concentrating on driving while he just zoned out into his own little world where there was no school or homework, Just swimming, the wonderful sea and heaps of fun…

He snaps out of his daydream as Virgil turned down a street, in the opposite direction to their house. Huh? What’s going on? He thought as he straightened up, his curiosity peaked.

“Um, where are we going? Home is that way…” He points in the direction they should have gone, looking at Virgil in confusion. “Did I miss something?”

“I gotta pick up some groceries, we’re pretty much out…” Virgil explained as they stopped a red traffic light. “And with Alan sick, it would be a good idea to stock up on food anyway...”

He grimaced at the reminder that his little brother was sick in bed right now, “Is he okay? I mean...do you know how sick he is?” He asked softly, concerned tinting his voice as he looked over at Virgil. “I know there’s this nasty cold that is going around the school, I really hope he didn’t catch that…”

One of his friends had caught it, and they had looked so terribly sick, face pale as can be, nose irritated red and raw as they would constantly be wiping or blowing it. Last he heard, they had been forced to stay home as they had gotten too sick to even leave their bed, let alone go to school.

That was a week ago, he hasn’t seen them since… so he really, really hoped Alan did not have that cold...

“From what Scott had told me, it seems to be a pretty bad cold..” Virgil sighed heavily as the light flashed green, the car starting to move again. “Other than that, I’m pretty much in the dark as well…”

He sighed leaning against the window, watching the buildings fly by them. Sometimes he would imagine Virgil’s green hunk of a pickup truck was a giant plane, taking him somewhere filled with adventure.

He had no idea where that idea had come from, but he found it very fun to imagine all the awesome scenarios. Sometimes there would be a little submarine, it would be yellow as that was his favourite colour, and it would take him to the bottom of the ocean floor, letting him explore the sea to his heart's content.

He shared this little daydream fantasy with Alan, who would come up with all sorts of crazy ideas. One of them being that he has his own ship, a spaceship that could explode all the space and still be home for dinnertime. A bright red spaceship to be exact…

They could spend hours playing pretend in Alan’s or his room, imagining that they were daring explorers heroes, out in the unknown, saving lives like their heroes and having lots and lots of fun…

He often joked that it would make an awesome tv show, people would go nuts for five dashing young heroes… Alan would just look at him weirdly like he grew another head…

They turned into the local supermarket car park, Virgil having to drive around a bit before finding a park as it was busy at this time of day.

“So...can we get more celery crunch bars?” He grinned at Virgil as they made their way inside the store. “I’m almost out of them…”

“We’re just getting the essentials, Gordon…” Virgil gave a long-suffering sigh as he grabbed a shopping trolley, “not junk food…”

“You wound me, brother!” He gasped in horror, holding his hand over his heart dramatically. “Celery crunch bars are not junk food, they are an essential part of a growing boy’s diet!”

“Why didn’t I just leave you in the car?” Virgil muttered softly to himself as they walked down a shopping aisle. “Fine, you can get them-“ He fist bumps the air in victory, “-but only a couple! I swear those things are full of super…”

He deliberately ignored that last part, running down the aisle to get his precious treats…

[soraegeeks]

Review: Fire in the Blood

Fire in the Blood by EllaBesmirched (El_Bell)  AU: Fantasy Fandom: Boku no Hero Academia/My Hero Academia Main relationships: Bakugou Katsuki/Midoriya Izuku/Todoroki Shouto; Katsuki and his harem of  spouses Status: Ongoing Rating: Explicit

Official summary:

For the first time in his life, Shouto Todoroki thinks he might be happy. Freed from his father's rule by the hand of his husband and now king, Shouto finds himself swept up in his lovers' embrace, the impending threat of a powerful necromancer and his undead pet with a grudge little more than a distant anxiety easily ignored for the miracle that is being loved by Katsuki and Izuku, and watching them love each other. But, as he feared, such happiness can't last. 

The Todoroki kingdom has fallen, sending its monarchs retreating to the mountains for shelter and aid. With the Todorokis unseated, Katsuki finds the threat of war on his eastern border more dangerous than ever before. A mad man has taken the Todoroki kingdom and he won't rest until the whole world lies broken at his feet. Tomura Shigaraki must be stopped, but the new alliance forged between the barbarian conqueror and the disgraced flatland king is tenuous at best. As tensions mount, Shouto finds himself trapped between two levees-- on one side, his kingdom, his blood, and his legacy, on the other, his lovers, his home, and the family that made him theirs. And he has no idea where he will be standing when the floodwaters break.

Hello kids, today's review is another fanfic by EllaBesmirched. (I need to figure out another name for my readers but that’s a problem for another day LOL) Fire In The Blood, also known as ‘Todoroki Shouto Can't Catch a Damn Break’ or ‘Welcome to the Fucked-up Todoroki Show’, is the sequel to Elle’s other work Fire in the Mountains. Check out my review of that fic if you haven't read it before or need a refresher. 

Let me start by saying that I have no idea what it is about Ella’s writing but EVERY TIME I sit down to review her stuff I end up with pages and pages of notes. I have 8 damn pages of notes in my notebook for this review alone. Insanity. LOL

The story opens on a beautiful Spring day where Katsuki and his extended family are enjoying a picnic. It’s peaceful, it’s fun, and then Shouto gets the surprise of his life when his birth family appears. The Todoroki Kingdom has fallen and the Todoroki family, along with Hawks and the Iida siblings, have fled for their lives. When your birth family unexpectedly shows up on your doorstep you know there’s a shitstorm brewing.

I drew this polycule diagram so I could explain this story to my husband. The look of confusion on his face tickled me so much and I knew I had to keep it and add it to my review.

Intimacy growth

As the story starts it’s been about a month since Katsuki and Shouto’s joining ceremony. About a month since Shouto started being intimate with Katsuki and Izuku. Touching is still a big thing for Shouto and he probably would have burned Hawks when he touched his shoulder in chapter 1 had others not been around. He almost freaked out when Mina, Kiri, and Denki wanted to more intimately touch him in chapter 2 but he seemed to be more open to platonic touching.

Like I mentioned in my review of FitM, between Shouto’s upbringing and his demisexuality, he's still working on wanting to be intimate and accepting that it's okay. And that there are different levels of intimacy that he's learning with Mina in chapter 1, Denki in chapter 9, Kiri in chapter 5. 

Chapter 5 was all-encompassing in my brain. I'm overwhelmed (in a good way) about Todoroki and Kiri connecting. Kiri helped Shouto open himself to other types of love. Like Katsuki said in a previous chapter, Shouto was caged in his upbringing. He wasn't given the room to learn human interaction. So when Shouto finds Kiri in their room, they have a mutual understanding. They both have broken familial relationships and a mutual connection with family members hating Katsuki. Shouto let Kiri in and learned more about himself and Kiri helped him see that it's okay to want sexual pleasure and not just “need” it. And Kiri was able to receive pleasure and not be treated like a sex toy in the way that others have treated him. It was beautiful how they connected and I loved that Kiri called Shouto his "soulmate’s soulmate.” They strengthened and developed another bond and that’s especially needed in a poly family.

Shouto had so much growth in chapter 9. The fact that he finally feels like he belongs and he was able to act on more of his desires. Being able to indulge in a dominant role with Katsuki, sexual activity with Denki, and acknowledge that he sees something in Mina and Ochako. His younger self would never have seen 21-year-old Shouto this way LOL. I read Shouto as having a “power” kink. He was always under Enji’s thumb but taking everything he learned from his experiences with Denki, Kiri, Katsuki, and Izuku, and even listening to Ochako were power-ups for him. Baby Dom in the making! Speaking of experiences, shoutout to Izuku for topping from the bottom. Whoo.

I feel bad for our poor baby Shouto. He’s still burdened with feeling ashamed about his scars. And he realized that he never asked Izuku about his scars because he assumed that Izuku had the same shame. Forgetting that scars are celebrated in the Outlands. Someone help the baby’s self-esteem!

I related to how Shouto reacted the first time he spoke with Hitoshi. After growing up in a cage and never having anything that was just HIS (not his feelings, not his thoughts) I’d feel violated and freak out, too. I don’t like people in my head and I’d never want someone in my head uninvited. Thankfully, Hitoshi's interaction with Denki put Shouto a little more at ease. I like Elle’s interpretation of Hitoshi as a mystic and his quirk as the magical ability to read thoughts/see emotions. 

I found the references to Katsuki periodically taking a submissive role very interesting. While he’s comfortable during the act, Katsuki wasn’t so comfortable letting other people know. In chapter 1 he was uneasy when he, Shouto, and Izuku were talking about it out at the picnic and again in chapter 9 when Denki barged in on him and Shouto. Ochako's "domineering" qualities were referenced a few times and I love it. It's a recurring theme we also see in FitM and in the side story where Katsuki seems afraid of her and yet intrigued and turned on.

Family

Shouto is learning, growing, and trying to balance his newfound family with what he feels he ‘owes’ to his birth family. At first, he didn’t want to ‘traumatize’, his sister and brother about his family situation, but then he said, ‘fuck it’ LOL. He “realized politics and formality could take a flying leap for all he cared.” These are his loves and everyone will have to accept it. (Note that I DO include Izuku as one of Katsuki’s spouses. I know that he technically isn’t but he’s Katsuki’s first love so that counts for me. LOL)  Shouto’s wedded family were very welcoming and looked to include Shouto’s birth family. Katsuki, in a totally Katsuki way, set the tone by telling Shouto’s siblings they shouldn't refer to him by title. “Nah, fuck that shit. Don’t highness me, I don’t play that bullshit with family.” And of course, Denki runs with it to flirt with Natsuo. I cackled when Shouto threatened him to behave, “I will freeze you to your seat, Denki, I swear it.” Katsuki, again, showed how much of a sweetheart he is when he made sure that Rei had her favorite foods during the Equinox celebration.

The burial ritual was beautifully described and I was so tickled by the narrator’s voice, “it was not, in fact, mostly the same” Shouto was exposed once again to a different tradition that he ended up liking better than the one he was raised on. There was such a sense of warmth with the spouses and extended family. And we got some introspection with Katsuki thinking on how he’d like to die.

I love Shouto’s little trio with Izuku and Katsuki. Their interactions tend to be a combo of chaos and insanity LOL. When Katsuki wants Shouto’s attention he has no problem bumping Izuku out of his way.  “Katsuki reached back and shoved Izuku with his palm across Izuku’s face without moving away from Shouto at all” Like, sir, what?! LOL In pairs they like to tease the other and Izuku is a little shit cause he repeatedly teased Katsuki for liking to be dominated. And bless their hearts when they get into an argument. "We shouldn't yell at each other." Katsuki and Izuku’s baggage makes Izuku nervous but they’re going to have arguments. Katsuki has admitted to trying to be a better man so they’ll get through it. They can be serious and protective like when Katsuki and Isuku stood up to Natsuo because he was being very ‘Enji-like” in criticizing Shouto. And when it comes to Enji’s ass Katsuki comes at him with bite and Izuku meets him with his head raised like an equal.

Shouto’s relationship with his birth family is complicated as hell. Shouto swings from confusion about being relieved that his father was alive and Enji apologizing for not believing their warning about Touya to being pissed at his father for being an ass and asking why Shoto didn't fulfill his spy mission.

Shouto’s birth family members’ responses to his family situation were interesting. Fuyumi being “scandalized” but wanting more details, Natsuo being completely shocked and wary, his mother giggling, and even Enji’s utter disgust. Not like Enji has any room for judgment since he’s having an affair with Hawks. Hypocrite.

Shoto is in such a hard place of wanting to save and return the Flatlands to his family but being loyal to and choosing to follow Katsuki’s decisions.

I can’t speak about family relations without touching on the sadness of chapter 5. In which both Kiri and Shouto felt like they were on the outside. Upon the arrival of the other tribes, Kiri’s facing heartbreak that he’s shunned by his birth family, and Shouto is feeling distant from his. And can we take a moment to address the fact that after all of the spouses grow old and die, Kiri will have to return home? 😞

On a lighter note, is Ochako pregnant with the first baby of the extended family?! 🤔

Shouto’s Childhood

This is such an ouch section. From Shouto’s POV, he's always felt that Touya was unfairly treated. From the moment he learned that Dabi was really Touya he just knew that Dabi was a twisted version of his brother.  But maybe as the youngest, his brotherly image was skewed and he didn't see the real things that happened. 

“And he died before you were. Old enough to figure out if he was worth it.”

Shouto learns from multiple people that Touya was cruel and cared little for other people. Natuso told him that Touya had kidnapped him and took him to a dangerous place an hour away. Not the garden where his 5-year-old mind remembered playing and learning fun magic. 

“He took you to the labyrinth,” Natsuo said again. “He didn’t tell anyone. You were gone for almost a day.”

And his mother, OH MY! To learn that his mother’s mental state was so wrecked that she confused him for his dead older brother and burned him. Heartbreaking. Something that I've been wondering, I don't think that Shigaraki just randomly picked Touya. I'm starting to think that when Touya started dabbling in necromancy they knew each other before his execution

“They didn't believe me when I said he had evil in his heart. Not all the time, of course. Loved his mother, loved his brothers, loved his sister. But. Sometimes. Enough. Set a servant girl's skirts on fire once, when she moved... something of his. Poor girl had a burn on her leg the size of my hand and I. Well. A mother does what she must. I didn't want to, but he needed to know. Know it's not nice to burn someone. Know what it felt like. Before he really hurt someone, you see. Your father was so angry he took my tea kettle away.”

Perceptions of Katsuki as King

There are conflicting views of Katsuki as king. Shouto, from an inside perspective, says that Katsuki is a good man and a great king. (I find it interesting that Hawks says that good men can't be kings.) 

Lady Ashido and the Kaminaris raised a fuss about their kids not being at the meetings assuming that Katsuki thinks they are too weak and he's been tricked by Shoto the  "doxy" (a new word for my commonplace book) and Izuku the usurper. In truth, Katsuki just worries about keeping his spouses safe and happy because he loves them. I cheered Shouto on when he snapped at Lady Ashido.

Izuku warns Shouto that the generals don't have undying loyalty to Katsuki because he conquered the other chiefs and collected the chiefdoms. And that there are snide remarks that he didn't take the chiefdom from Izuku. Tarloh acknowledges that he does have talent, “Man’s a tactical fucking genius. Brain of a king. Heart of a warrior.” They just think that he's young and idealistic. For Katsuki, though, he’d rather be that than anything else. 

“We’re all fucking naive idealist bastards and I’d rather be a fool on a throne with my family beside me than wise and alone and powerless.”

HAWKS

What can I say about Hawks really?! There were so many allusions Elle left throughout the whole story that there is more to Hawks than anyone knows. In Chapter 2, Shouto notices that it is very odd that somehow Hawks hid behind Enji’s bulk when there should not have been a way for that to happen.

What is it about Hawks that really sets Shouto off but no one else?? Shouto is so disturbed by him but no one else sees it and they think Shouto just finds him attractive which he does but there's just something about Hawks that unnerves him. Hawks does a lot of things that don’t seem to make sense. He’s more open with Shouto and seems to hide less of himself when they’re one-on-one but he speaks in riddles. Shouto is the only one who ever sees Hawks’ slight facial or body twitches. 

The quote “he’d seen exactly what Hawks had wanted him to see” says a lot about him. Hawks only does things that benefit Hawks and I sort of wonder if he was so purposely so loud while having sex with Enji.  Shouto remembers in the past that Hawks appeared out of nowhere or was more visible in places than you would think a spymaster wouldn’t.

At the same time, the one person who SHOULD get a read on him can’t. His mind is completely blank to Shinsou and he tries multiple times. All of the sneakiness comes to a head in chapter 11. I won't give that away because it deserves to be experienced in writing. 

I will end this by saying that chapter 11 left me screaming. I felt like this is why we can’t have nice things! LOL (If you’ve already read the chapter and want to talk about it PLEASE hit me up. I need to scream with others! LOL) Shouto’s gonna be a badass ruler when this is all over. If they all make it through the coming storm.

[purplesurveys]

926

Significant other/crush survey

–CURRENT–

Something that you have in common: We’re working towards getting to pretty much the same industry, we’re both competitive as fuck and hate losing, we love dogs though she’s way better at disciplining them, and we love our coffee.

Are they a friend or just an acquaintance? She’s already my girlfriend. But she’s also my best friend.

Do you make an effort to talk to them or wait for them to talk to you? It works both ways, but generally I’m more talkative and I like sharing stories so I initiate conversations more often. Sometimes it can be annoying when I feel like she never starts a convo first, but I’ve come to understand that she’s not really the texting/IM-ing type.

What happens when you make eye contact? I mean, we’re always making eye contact lol but if we do it accidentally, we usually give each other a smile.

How often to you get to see this person? I used to see her 2-3 times a week when we were still in school since I drove and it was easy to see her whenever I wanted and could. Now that we’re maneuvering ~employment~ and ~being an adult~ in the middle of Covid, we haven’t figured out our arrangement yet and how often we could see each other. At the moment, it’s 1-2 times a month.

What bothers you the most about this person? She can get a little selfish and fail to consider my emotions and vulnerability if a situation personally doesn’t bother her. I’ve asked her to work on it and I’ve seen progress here and there, but when it comes down to it she simply tends to be individualistic and likes to look out for herself. Those are not bad things per se, it’s just that they sometimes end up affecting me.

Who is usually the first to flirt? She is, but that’s saying a lot as we aren’t too much of the flirting type. Maybe flirt is the wrong word...I’d say she’s the first to act cheekily. 

–MEMORIES–

How, when, and where did you meet? i’ve known her for the last 18 years but did not formally meet her until 2011. She had a friend, I had a friend, and those friends were friends so they introduced us to each other and it turned out that it was the two of us who hit it off really well and it was the quickest I’ve gained a best frend. We had attended the same school since kindergarten and we became friends when we became classmates for the first time in 7th grade.

What did you first talk about? I have no idea what our first encounter covered anymore, but I can tell you that what gave me the sign that she was going to be my best friend was when she watched Johnny English Reborn one weekend and came back to school the next Monday a complete fangirl for Gillian Anderson. As someone who was in my own fandoms that time I needed someone with the same energy and humor, and she showed up at exactly the right moment.

What is the best thing they have done for you? Saved my life. Literally. I’ve had more lows than highs and she saw them all through with me every single time, whether it was being by my side when I needed to cry in my car for a whole evening or helping me make a Powerpoint presentation due the next day when my entire group was not helping me. 

When was the last time you saw them? The other day.

Last thing you said to them? I apologized for the late reply and explained that I was having dinner.

Last thing they said to you? She just replied to that ^ saying not to worry.

What originally caught your eye? I started finding her really pretty in junior year and loved that her mind was always racing with thoughts to share and stories to tell me. I can’t exactly pinpoint the moment when I started *liking* her though; it happened all so very suddenly.

What was your first impression? When I first met her 9 years ago I could hardly believe she’d want to meet me and eat lunch with me and stuff because she was a popular girl, very well-liked and got along with everybody; I was virtually unknown throughout grade school and never had friendships that lasted. It was very weird to suddenly be talking to her since she just seemed way out of my league but when I realized she’s just as weird and nerdy and goofy as I was and not at all like the mean popular girls we had, I immediately took a liking to her.

What was their first impression of you? No clue and she’d probably have no clue either even if you asked her. She’s very forgetful.

Were you ever previously involved with them? Yeah we went out in 2014 but broke up then got back together.

What is your most memorable moment with this person? I have so many. I can probably give you one for each year that we’ve been friends/girlfriends. Off the top of my head, I’d go with the fact that my first out-of-town trip alone was with her, when we celebrated my 20th birthday in Nasugbu and Tagaytay.

–IN YOUR OPINION–

What is their best physical feature? I’d say her smile is my favorite, but I love so many features of her too like her eyes, dimples, hair, and the fact that I can squeeze her arms any time I want as she has a bit of chub :)

Personality trait? She cares so deeply about the people who mean a lot to her and would be very protective of them. Also, she’s super ambitious and isn’t one to shy away from a new or daring task.

Describe this person in three words: Hates to lose.

What are they like in comparison to your last crush? The closest thing I have to a ‘last crush’ is Andi, but tbh I didn’t develop much of a relationship with her since she migrated just a year after we became friends. I can hardly remember the conversations we had either...personality-wise, I’d say Andi’s a little aloof (at least back then) and shy; she avoided me when we first encountered each other. Gab’s amiable and will be nice to everyone immediately.

What are they like in comparison to the last person you dated? The last two relationships I’ve had were/are with Gab, and I wasn’t seeing anyone before her.

On a scale of 1 to 10 (Physical Appearance): 38

On a scale of 1 to 10 How much do you like them? 50

On a scale of 1 to 10 How much do you think they like you? Hahaha I hope it’s a 10.

–THE FACTS–

How much older/younger are they than you? She’s younger by like a month and a half. Really no difference at all.

How much taller/shorter are they than you? She’s a few centimeters taller, not a dramatic difference but enough for it to be noticeable.

Where are they from? She’s from the same city but we live on opposite ends, so it takes around 30-45 minutes to get to her place depending on how fast I’m driving ha. 

What do they look like? She’s around 5′3″, the prettiest wavy hair, big eyes, chubby cheeks, and she got a bit of West Asian genes due to her Turkish blood. 9 out of 10 times she gets asked if she’s Indian.

Describe their smile: It’s very warm and friendly. I automatically smile when I see it.

What about their friends? Her friends and I have different personalities so we don’t get to hang much, but Kris and Marts are very nice and have always been to me.

Is this person talented/skilled? Very. Not being biased but I’ve noticed that she’s ended up being skilled enough at anything she tries, whether it’s singing, playing a sport, handling a balisong, etc. She’s good at everything and it makes me kinda annoyed sometimes hahaha, because I’m so clumsy and only good at like three things.

Popular/well-known? S u p e r. She will light up any room she enters and people just naturally flock to her. She’s very sociable and knows how to handle all kinds of people and make them feel at ease. I’m the complete antithesis of her lol. 

What school do they go to? We went to the same school from kindergarten to high school, then for university she went to a school a couple of cities away from mine.

What kind of car do they drive? I can’t remember exactly even though I just saw it the other day skskkssk it’s either a Honda Civic or a Toyota Vios.

What kind of clothes do they wear? Sometimes she’ll put her rich aunt vibes out and wear nice flowy printed dresses or blouses. But she mostly dresses casually; a graphic tee or polo shirt with high-waisted denim jeans do it for her.

When is their birthday? June 5th.

–RANDOM–

How many people do you know with their first name? Lots. It’s a common name.

What is one thing they do that you don’t like? Again, her tendency to unconsciously shut down my feelings.

–THE FUTURE–

How long do you think you’ll like this person? When I like/love a person I never think about when I hope to stop that action... as long as she doesn’t do anything that breaks my trust or hurts me beyond repair, I’m happy to stick with her.

What would you do if they asked you out right now? I’d say there’s still a curfew and we can get arrested ha, but we can try the next day.

What do you want to happen next? I just want the journey to be smooth. We’re in a different chapter now and we’re no longer just college kids with safety nets and we’ve had more frequent serious conversations about our priorities, commitment, and our relationship in the long run. Most recently we agreed that the relationship mustn’t get in the way of our personal goals, especially career-wise; and that we’ll always have each other’s support in whatever we do and achieve.

[cnrothtrek]

2019 fanfiction retrospective, part 2

For a list of my fave fics this year, see the previous post. Thanks to @mia-cooper for these questions!

Best fic I published all year:

I’m gonna go with two fics because one is the sequel of the other, and they are “When we all fall asleep, where do we go?” and “The world we made.”

Why? I’d had the idea for a femme fatale, space pirate mirror!Janeway in my head for a while, and @angrywarrior69’s @voyagermirrormarch event was the push I needed to finally make it happen. With some inspiration from Billie Eilish, I was able to really nail down KJ’s character and the theme that would come out of the story. I had no idea it would become what it did, but I’m really pleased with how it turned out. I was able to apply a lot of I’ve been learning about story structure. It made the plot and the pacing so much better than other fics I’d written before, and helped me realize how much my skills have improved since I started writing fanfic back in 2016.

I also think these stories added something fresh to the fandom. Mirror universe stories for Voyager are out there, and there are some deliciously evil ones. But for this I wanted to write sympathetic, morally gray, dystopian versions of the prime characters we know. Despite being mirrors, they are just as human as their utopian counterparts—just as capable of love and just as vulnerable to heartbreak—only they have been shaped by a much less kind universe. And given the wonderful response I got from readers, it seems I was able to pull it off.

Favorite opening line:

Nothing fired Kathryn up like getting a little blood on her hands. (from “When we all fall asleep, where do we go?”)

Why? First sentences aren’t something I worry about perfecting, so I don’t have many great ones that can stand apart from the first couple paragraphs of a story. This one, however, just sort of came out. It felt like a good way to immediately pull readers into the mirror universe and make mirror!Janeway distinct from prime!Janeway.

Favorite closing line:

“And if she does give you any problems—“ He smiles. “She’ll have to come through me.” (from “Air”)

Why? I love it when fics flesh out characters who don’t get explored a lot in canon. @jhelenoftrek and @klugtiger did such a good job of that for Joe Carey in their B’Elanna/Joe AU. Those stories made me really like Joe a lot, and so it just felt very right to include him in this fic to support Marla. He really shines throughout the story, and this final line just tops off all that we’ve seen from him—his compassion for Marla when everyone else probably hates her, using things he learned as a parent of a son with panic disorder, and just being an overall gem of a person. But here we see that not only is he willing to defend a pariah, he is one of a few people who can stand up to B’Elanna without breaking a sweat. And I love that.

Favorite overall line (bonus question):

Kathryn scowled at her console, the faint, distorted reflection of her face like a wraith mirroring her expression. (from “When we all fall asleep, where do we go?”)

Why? This is the point in the story where mirror!KJ’s arc really takes off. One of her monikers was “the intendant’s monster,” which is a thematic thread woven throughout this story and the sequel. Is she merely perceived as a monster, or is she truly one? What is it that makes someone a monster? At this low point, she sees a macabre version of herself reflected back at her—a wraith, a ghost-like creature that appears just before death. It’s a telling image.

Fic that was best received & my favorite comment on it:

There are a lot of ways to define which fic was best received. “A Very Bad Doctor, Indeed” (Garashir) has the most kudos. “Game On” (K/7) has the most comments relative to length of the fic. “Aye, Captain” got several non-J/7 shippers to enjoy a J/7 fic. (All of these are Bad Ensign Stories and wouldn’t exist without @curator-on-ao3’s brilliance.)

But I want to give the nod to “When we all fall asleep.” I’m not sure I could pick one favorite comment, but the most meaningful comments were some variation of “I don’t normally like mirror fics, but yours are great.” Honestly, I’m not sure I could get a higher compliment than that.

Fic you wish had gotten more love:

“I’ve got a bullet for a tooth.” This is a short fic between the first and second main parts of the MU series, and it focuses on Ezri. I’m sad that people didn’t seem interested in this one, cuz I actually really like it. Mirror!Ezri is fucking awesome, and her dynamics with Harry and KJ are fun.

Fandoms I wrote for:

Voyager primarily, with some DS9 (one exclusively DS9 and a few crossovers in the mirror universe series)

Favorite pairings to write for:

Obviously, my main ship has always been J/C. But lately I’ve been straying some from them, though I haven’t settled on any one pairing to write copious amounts on. I just write what I feel like writing—whatever I feel the need to explore. I like changing it up, playing with different characters and ideas in ways I haven’t seen others do.

What you’re writing now/next:

Right now, I’m trying to pull the rest of my counselor AU (“Far From Their Bones”) out of my brain and onto the page. I’m slowly making progress—one chapter is completely done, three chapters are partially done, and my outline is getting more fine-tuned all the time.

Next on my list is a fic that explores Tom Paris’ backstory through a lense of bipolar disorder which, after being diagnosed myself a year ago, I have learned a great deal about. And of course there’s always more on my running list of ideas, including that K7 “Someone to Watch Over Me” AU that I keep saying I’m going to write but never do lol. So we’ll see what happens.

Writing goals for 2020:

FINISH FAR FROM THEIR BONES. I’ve never wanted anything more lol.

[makeste]

BnHA Chapter 160: Grand Theft Auto

Previously on BnHA: Deku knocked Overhaul THE FUCK OUT. Tamaki saved Aizawa and captured Chronostasis. Eri wasn’t able to deactivate her quirk, and for a few moments things didn’t look good for Deku. But the cavalry brought Aizawa to the surface just in time, and he erased Eri’s quirk and she passed out. The heroes called like a dozen fucking ambulances to evacuate all of the wounded. Nighteye was strangely peaceful for someone who just lost an arm and got impaled through the fucking stomach, and he was grateful to Deku for bringing about a future different from the one he had seen. I feel like Deku sensed something was going to happen, because he suddenly started encouraging Nighteye to hang on, and that he had to talk to All Might and make up with him. But Nighteye closed his eye really dramatically, and I’M FEARING THE WORST HERE YOU GUYS. We then cut to the ambulance containing the wounded villains (and their confiscated goods, including the quirk-be-gone bullets and the quirks-come-back serum), and watched as it was intercepted by a trucking carrying none other than SHIGARAKI FUCKING TOMURA. This is easily the most badass villain thing he’s ever done tbh.

Today on BnHA: We learn that Jin and Toga called the rest of the squad to let them know where the villain ambulance was headed. What ensues is probably the most badass action sequence this series has ever had. Dabi takes out the ambulance’s police escort with his quirk, but it turns out the car is protected by a pro hero named Snatch. He can manipulate sand and he is fucking awesome. So Tomura fucking leaps at him from the back of a moving truck, and the two of them start to duke it out, but Snatch keeps him at a distance, knowing better than to let Tomura touch him with his bare hands. Enter Compress, who rolls an innocent little marble under the car they’re battling on, and then snaps his fingers and turns the marble back into A GIANT FUCKING BOULDER. The car flips over and crashes into the ambulance; Spinner whips the truck around while shrieking nonsense; Dabi and Compress take care of Snatch; and Tomura goes to confront Overhaul in the crashed ambulance. He takes the bullets and the serum. And then he disintegrates Overhaul’s fucking hands and chops them off at the wrists. And he and the rest of the League just casually walk away. Holy. Fucking. Shit.

(As always, all comments not marked with an ETA are my unspoiled reactions from my first readthrough of this chapter. I’ve read up through chapter 187 now, so any ETAs will reflect that.) 

so basically they figured out that the police would have to transport the villains to the nearest villain hospital, so they went on Google Maps and found the fastest route, and from there it was simply a matter of intercepting them

so Toga’s on the phone with Compress. and she says Jin is the one who told her to contact the others. I like that she gives him credit where due

(ETA: I can’t believe this joke went right over my head earlier, but at the time I had somehow forgotten Compress’s arm status. now that I remember, I can’t fucking get over this bit:

this son of a bitch kidnapped Bakugou. how dare he be so absurdly charming now. praising Toga for her quick thinking and making jokes about his own missing limb. I can’t believe the entire League of Villains are now collectively my favorite character.)

Jin is cradling his head in his hands and trembling :(

oh my god I love how she just gently takes his hand and leads him along. lord help me, why do I ship this so fucking hard, goddamn

also she’s so fucking smart. she watched and waited for a while before she contacted the others. to make sure that’s where the “finished product” was headed, since she knows that’s what Tomura was after, and they weren’t able to get ahold of Eri

and now we’re cutting back to the highway

this poor driver is having himself a hell of a morning

boy, you about to earn that paycheck today

(ETA: yeah I’m pretty sure this guy is dead now. this joke didn’t age so well ffffff rest in peace??)

and he instantly recognizes Tomura and knows him by name. but I suppose he’s just about the most recognizable villain in the business when he’s all done up in full hand gear

(ETA: it’s cute that he feels the need to clarify, as though there was more than one Shigaraki Tomura running around and we needed to know which particular league this one hails from.)

I have to imagine it’s not actually that easy to maintain one’s balance on top of a moving truck. you sure are full of surprises aren’t you Tomura

oh shit Spinner’s here too!

(ETA: is Dabi just being cute here or do you suppose he really does get carsick. are you gonna puke on everyone, Dabi. do you need some dramamine)

haven’t seen you in ages, Spinner. we still don’t know what your quirk is if I recall

(ETA: oh my god, and we still don’t. Horikoshi you are playing a dangerous game, dragging it out for this long. if it doesn’t turn out to be some incredibly badass, plot-twisty thing when it’s finally revealed, you and I are gonna have words. I swear to god if we finally get that dialogue box and all it is is something like “quirk: lizard. does whatever a lizard can!”... I didn’t wait around this whole time for you to be all “LOL HE CAN SMELL STUFF WITH HIS TONGUE”, okay.)

this guy really learned how to drive from video games and Tomura still trusted him to drive this fucking truck while he stands ON TOP OF IT. wow

Spinner is disgruntledly muttering about not being sure whether this is really following Stain’s will

and Tomura can somehow hear him from on top of the truck, and he says this is “a necessary sacrifice”

he’s gotten so good at management. he really has matured a lot

I really want to see this in the anime. mainly because I feel like Tomura’s jacket is going to be whipping around in the wind and it’s going to look cool as fuck

like, if this scene plays out anywhere near like I’m expecting it’s about to, this is basically going to be our confirmation that Tomura has finally graduated from the ranks of “baby villain” to “main villain at large”

(ETA: yeah I think it’s safe to say our boy has got his bachelor of villainy)

ohhhhhhh shit

THIS IS GOING TO LOOK SO FUCKING AMAZING IN THE ANIME YOU GUYS

(ETA: it stands a good chance of surpassing the one in Black Panther to become my new favorite car chase tbh)

jesus christ

that cop car that was in between the villain truck and the ambulance was completely engulfed

oh! or maybe not, because it looks like the car is FIGHTING BACK

I LIKE THIS GUY. WHAT A BADASS. WHY HAVE WE NEVER SEEN HIM BEFORE, THAT’S A DAMN GOOD QUIRK

(ETA: maybe a little too good. that’s probably why this is his one and only appearance)

Tomura’s just annoyed, though, and he’s telling Spinner to slow down

so now Snatch is pumping the truck full of sand, but at the same time Tomura is leaping right at him

Snatch are you about to be disintegrated my dude

oh!!

HE’S NOT GOING DOWN WITHOUT A FIGHT

lol what

lmao just because someone is capable of holding you back for more than two seconds doesn’t mean they’re your “natural opposite” Tomura. I’m not quite sure you understand how that works. is he restoring a pile of dust back into its original form like what we all hope will happen in Avengers: Endgame? no? then he’s not your opposite, he’s just a guy with an awesome quirk that you’re having a bit of trouble with

he is fucking amazing, though

he’s absolutely right. Tomura he got your number dude

Dabi and Compress are still in the truck watching this play out

and Compress realizes that Tomura is trying to distract the guy

oh snap

you know, I’m starting to realize Compress’s quirk is quite a bit more badass than I previously thought

ohhhhhhhh shit

(((╹д╹;)))

aaaaaaand the ambulance is crashing

do you see how they did that? making it clear beyond a doubt what happened without actually showing it in horrific excruciating detail? I could have used more of this during the Overhaul arc

(ETA: also this answers a question I had as to whether Tomura had ever actually killed one of the good guys (as opposed to a fellow villain) onscreen. I couldn’t recall for sure. but that’s a definite yep.)

also this is a super epic car crash. this is crazy cinematic, it’s straight out of a movie

LMAO

I LOVE IT

and oh my god it looks like Snatch actually saved the driver just in time. so no one was disintegrated after all!

(ETA: I actually think that’s the driver of the police car that he saved. not the ambulance driver. he ded. correct me if I’m wrong!)

but now Dabi is there >_>

preemptive RIP, Snatch. you were the GOAT for one whole half of a chapter

I’ll take that as a “no I haven’t”

oh snap is he still alive though?

but we can all agree the other guy definitely died. that driver cop guy. rest in peace, friend

(ETA: yeah both drivers are super dead from what I can see)

so now back to the ambulance, where Tomura has retrieved and is talking to Overhaul who is strapped to a bed

TAKE HIS QUIRK!!!

Tomura says he hates Overhaul because he’s arrogant

something is clearly about to go down, so before that happens I’ll just say, I thought Overhaul could disassemble anything he touches. so how come he can’t just do that to the handcuffs. plothoooooooles

anyway

well LOOK WHO GOT HIMSELF A SHINY NEW ROBOT ARM MOTHERFUCKER

THIS MAN DESERVES HIS REVENGE. AND... YOU DESERVE TO DIE

(ETA: any idea what he just compressed, btw? I can’t for the life of me figure it out. this chapter is so cool but there are a handful of little details that I can’t quite get straight)

(ETA 2: many thanks to @baezetsu who pointed out that COMPRESS MOTHERFUCKING STOLE ONE OF OVERHAUL’S ARMS. straight up. you’re absolutely right. Tomura only disintegrates the right hand, and the left arm is already gone in the panel below. so either this is some good old-fashioned “eye for an eye” revenge (but with arms), or Compress is looking to replace that robot arm with something even better. god this chapter gets better and better with every subsequent readthrough holy shiiiiiiiiiit.)

so now Tomura is opening the box of bullets, and thoughtfully saying that he’s not sure which of the two boxes they recovered actually holds the finished product

“ahh well, guess it doesn’t really matter”

oHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH SHITTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT

oH MY GOD!!!!

MOTHERFUCKER!!!! MY JAW DROPPED TO LIKE HERE. HOLY SHIT, THAT WAS THE MOST HARDCORE SHIT I’VE EVER SEEN??!?

HERE I WAS SURE HE WAS GONNA DELETE HIS QUIRK, AND INSTEAD HE JUST DISINTEGRATES AND THEN CHOPS OFF HIS MOTHERFUCKING HANDS

SHIGARAKI TOMURA HAS GAINED +10,000 VILLAIN POINTS!! SHIGARAKI TOMURA IS MAKING A SUDDEN POWER RISE THROUGH MAKESTE’S FAVORITE CHARACTERS LIST

SHIGARAKI TOMURA IS ONE CRAZY BITCH AND I KIND OF FUCKING LOVE IT

THIS IS SO FUCKED UP AND I’M LIVING FOR IT?????

“GOOD LUCK WITH THAT”!!!!!

yo, when Deku and the others hear about this attack later what will their reactions even be. cuz if it was me I’d be like, “oh no... that’s terrible... you know. in principle”

hahaha!!!!

(ETA: gotta love Overhaul screaming in the background. this chapter is so fucked up lmao)

THIS HAD BETTER BE A FUCKING PROMISE TO US LOYAL READERS YOU SON OF A BITCH. NO MORE SIDE VILLAINS. I’VE GOT FIFTY-ODD CHAPTERS LEFT BEFORE I’M ALL CAUGHT UP, AND THOSE FIFTY CHAPTERS HAD BETTER NOT FEATURE ANY OTHER BAD GUYS BUT YOU SONS OF BITCHES

(ETA: he just ignores everything I ever say to him)

oh man. well, that was a grand five chapter binge and I feel satisfied and very exhausted. I’m gonna turn in, and then tomorrow I can hopefully finally read a chapter with my explosive and hot and cold sons at long last

BONUS:

likes: barbeque. is this Horikoshi’s idea of a joke. holy shit

and I guess that confirms whether or not he died, huh. these motherfuckers didn’t leave any survivors apart from the captured villains. that’s so messed up. why do I love them so much. Tomura you are a terrible man. please keep getting more terrible

[peterjakes]

My Mad Fat Diary Fanfic - The Two Months - Chapter 2

Chapter 2 - Two Old Friends

Writing this chapter made me realise how much easier it was to write a Chop x Archie piece lol. I still enjoyed writing this chapter but not so sure about it - let me know!

Also published on ao3: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20154688/chapters/47748709#workskin

Finn and Archie had been friends for a very long time. Yeah, Finn considered him his best mate. He loved the lad and would do anything for him. The two saw each other down the chippy and Archie wasn’t looking himself. Finn thought it odd, considering everything was sorted now. He suggested going for a chat. He and Archie weren’t the best at letting people know how they feel but that was something Archie said he wanted to change. Finn wasn’t so sure. He liked being a little closed off, a little secretive, even though this meant he seemed like a right grumpy sod to outsiders. This didn’t matter though, as long as the gang and Rae understood him. They were the only real ones that did, and he was thankful for that.

Everything that had happened recently, it taught him that everyone had stuff and sometimes they didn’t want to talk about it. But sometimes that’s actually what you need the most. The chats Finn has had with Rae since everything, they’ve been open, and they’ve become closer because of it. It was weird, Finn and Rae seemed to work just as well when they weren’t together. That’s what was so good about their relationship. They were best mates. Like him and Arch. With a slight difference of course.

Finn finished football practice - one of the only things he enjoyed now that he left college and moved out. During that period, it became harder to see everyone and he missed it. Last summer, the summer of ‘96… that was the best time of his life and he wanted to get that back. He didn’t have enough time to head back to his flat to change, Archie was probably already on his way. Archie had a tendency to be stupidly early. Finn packed his kit away and took a quick shower.

Walking past the pitch, he noticed the weather changing. It wasn’t cold anymore, the sun seemed to want to come out and be enjoyed by everyone but there was something holding it back. Finn walked past a young family on the seesaw and headed for the swings. This was his most used spot in the park. It’s where he and Archie had spent so many hours talking over the years. It’s where he and Rae had that chat. It’s where he’d taken himself to be alone and just think. He plonked down on the left swing, pulling out a cigarette and lighter from his denim jacket. He felt like he hadn’t had a proper smoke in ages, something he desperately needed. He pulled a drag and watch the smoke float away. Once it disappeared, there came walking Archie.

Archie was struggling, really struggling. It was strange, he didn’t think everything would be all fine and dandy, he didn’t think it would go back to normal. What even was normal? That definitely wasn’t Archie. It’s not like he was alone, everyone had their own shit to deal with. But everyone else seemed to be able to deal with it – or at least they could just hide it. Archie had kept his secret for so long, and at first the relief he felt was immense. But recently, it was as if he was still keeping something from everyone. And it was eating away at him, which was something he didn’t think he’d be able to cope with for much longer.

Finn was someone Archie wanted to confine in, but neither of the two boys could bring themselves to do it. That awful toxic masculinity. But there was this kind of unspoken agreement between the two, which was especially evident after Archie came out, that even if they didn’t say how they felt, they would back each other. Being friends for 12 years meant something, even if they didn’t tell each other that. Finn agreeing to meeting for a chat was music to Archie’s ears, neither were much talkers but Archie needed this – otherwise he felt like he’d explode.

Archie found Finn on the swings, he brushed down the swing before sitting down on it and turned to Finn, giving him a weak smile.

“Cheers for meeting, I…I really appreciate it, Finn.”

Finn could see Archie wasn’t right, no not that he wasn’t right, but it was obvious something was going on. Finn knew what it was like, not saying anything, not letting on, when in reality he was struggling to keep it together. That only happened a few times, one being when he and Rae first split. That was fucking hard. But like everyone else, he dealt with it. Wasn’t easy, but he kept going. That’s just what everyone had to do.

“It’s ‘lright, bud.” He offered Archie a cigarette, even though he knew Archie didn’t smoke, not seriously anyway. As expected, his friend waved it away, and started to fiddle with his specs. One of the many things he knew Archie did when he was nervous. For the first time, Finn felt an awkwardness between them. After 12 years of friendship, 12 years of playing football, mucking about down the rec, going down the pub. This feeling, it wasn’t nice. He didn’t know what to do. He wanted Archie to be happy, he was his best mate and only wanted the best for him. He got that things were going to be tough for a while, it wasn’t going to be all smiles and roses. Life wasn’t like that all the time. Everyone had stuff they had to fight to deal with. But Finn didn’t like seeing any of the gang like this, especially Archie.

“You seen Chopper? He’s being a right melt at the minute, honestly don’t know how to handle ‘im. Kept going on ‘bout how we all need to see each other. Works both ways though, donit.” He offered the boy beside him a reassuring smile and lit his second cigarette of the day. He knew he had to swerve the conversation to the real reason they were meeting. “Arch, I know something’s up, I can always tell ‘ya know.”

Archie hadn’t expected Finn to linger too much on filler conversation, wasn’t a great talent of his but he didn’t blame him. He liked that about Finn. There was never any bullshit with him. Archie knew Finn only offered him a cigarette to be polite, he really only smoked to fit in. It was stupid, really. Yeah, Finn looked cool doing it, but Archie could never really pull it off. He’d stick to playing football and reading. There wasn’t going to be anymore fakery from Archie, he knew he couldn’t do it much longer.

Archie laughed at the thought of Chop.

“That’s Chop, for ‘ya. Always thinking up something.”

“Yeah, I know. I’ve been… Just been thinking about everything, ‘ya know? It’s just been a lot. I dunno, I’m being stupid really.” Archie laughed it off, it wasn’t as if anything serious was actually going on. But something did feel right, like there was a sort of disturbance in his life. It wasn’t how people were reacting to him, anyone who was originally bothered by him had kept their distance and everyone else, well, they had been brilliant. Better than he had ever thought they could be. College was much easier now; the gang was back together, and he could actually enjoy himself. Durham was in his sights. He didn’t like to brag, but it was likely he’d get in. His parents would be proud. He’d have the time of his life. But none of that seemed to matter, not in the last few days. Talking to Chop hadn’t helped, it distracted him for a few hours sure, but walking home he had time to think and he didn’t fancy that. He knew he’d had to stand up to his thoughts and feelings at some point.

Finn hated seeing anyone down, especially Archie. Only recently had everything seemed so hard. Finn also hated it when Archie just brushed off his problems, Finn wasn’t an idiot – he could tell when something was wrong, really wrong. And this seemed to be one of those times, but he didn’t want to force Archie. On the other hand, would have Archie agreed to meet up if he didn’t want to talk about it? Finn was never one for talking about things that didn’t matter. He didn’t say a lot. But when he did, he meant it.

“Arch, you can talk to meh, ya know. It’s ‘lright. Has summat happened? Whatever ‘ya thinking, s’not stupid. I promise.

Of course Finn was being ridiculously understanding. That’s what Finn did. That’s who Finn was. Archie couldn’t think of one time that Finn was unreasonable or when he’d judge you for your thoughts or actions. Finn just wasn’t the type.

“Nah, nothin’. Not really. It’s just me, isn’t it? Nothing’s ever easy is, it? It’s like Churchill said, ‘If you’re going through hell, keep going’, right. But how can you keep going when your body doesn’t want to?” Archie shook his head; he knew he wasn’t making any sense. All of his thoughts kept going around and around in his head, as if on a hamster wheel, but the minute he tried to articulate them they all seemed to disappear. This time, he wanted to tell Finn how he’d been feeling, he knew he would understand and try to help. But the words just didn’t want to form, not in the right way anyway. Archie rubbed under his nose, trying to figure out what to say. He didn’t exactly know what the problem was, or at least he hadn’t allowed himself to think about it properly to realise. He never wanted to burden Finn with his troubles, but he couldn’t do that without explaining properly what was wrong. He released himself from the right swing, feeling the cold wind on his fingertips and turned towards his Finn, who was looking slightly bemused.

“I know I’m not making sense. I’m… I’m just wasting your time, mate.”

No, Archie wasn’t making much sense in what he was saying but Finn could tell. He could always tell. There was something really bugging his friend beside him, something that Finn soon realised wasn’t just going to go away.

“Archie, just listen to meh for a minute, right. Don’t need to hear any Churchill bullocks. What is going on with ya? Ya haven’t just started being like this out of the blue, I’ve noticed, ya know. Just tell meh, please mate. It’ll be alright.”

“Churchill gave some great speeches ‘ya know.” Archie nodded at Finn, to which his friend smirked at, but this soon faltered back into the concerned look Finn always gave Archie when he thought something serious was wrong. Those puppy dog eyes, he knew how to use them, Archie would give him that. Archie wasn’t going to give him anything else. He didn’t know how to explain what was wrong. He felt like now everyone was back together, he should have felt happy. Felt fine. But that just wasn’t the case. And that’s why he felt weird. Out of place. Not quite right.

“I dunno, really. I feel like I have all of these feelings and thought inside my head and I…I just can’t get them out. Not properly. My mum, she said that I should talk to someone at college, about everything. All my revelations. Now that’s a load of bullocks. Nothing is really wrong. I guess…I dunno. Things are changing and, I’ve never been good with that, you know that.” Archie paused, allowing Finn to take it all in. His friend was nodding along to everything he was saying, but Archie highly doubted he understood anything. No one seemed to understand him. Even if Archie was being a bit dramatic.

“I just thought it would be a bit easier by now.”

“Things take time, Arch. I’m proud of you though, you handled everything with class. I’m sorry I ‘aven’t been there for ya recently, mate. I’ll make it up to ‘ya, scout’s honour” Finn gave Archie a twinkling smile, took one last drag and put out his cigarette. He got up and stood next to his old friend, patting on the back. He hadn’t been the greatest friend in the world to Archie, better than some, but definitely not the best.

“I know Chop mentioned Barney t’other day. Has this got anything to do with how ‘ya feeling? ‘Cos Chopper isn’t always the best when it comes to uncomfortable subjects. ‘ya know he didn’t mean it though. Everyone reacts differently, and he loves ‘ya to pieces. We all do.”

“Cheers, mate. That means a lot. But that doesn’t matter, not really.” Archie smiled to himself at Finn’s ‘scouts’ comment, Finn always knew how to lighten the mood when it was pretty low. He was always careful and serious, especially when it came to Archie, but he was still a joker.

Archie sat down on the patch of grass in front of the swings and motioned Finn to sit beside him, which his friend obeyed to.

“He didn’t say anything wrong; he was fine actually. Not something we say that often about him.” Chop’s heart was always in the right place, or at least it had been, but he wasn’t very good at navigating it.

“I just…I feel like I don’t how I’m gonna move forward, ya know? Got nothing to do with Chop or Barney, alright? Just struggling with everything, I guess.” This wasn’t completely untrue. He was struggling, Chop had actually made him feel better for a while and moving forward was something he was trying to do and wanted to do. But the mention of Barney, well, he had been thinking about him a little since the afternoon at the pub with Chop. He was a good kisser. He had something interesting to say. And he actually listened to Archie. He was good-looking too. They hadn’t spoken much, not since that night. Barney would appear in and out of their lives; like most of the lads, he didn’t go to college much, obviously had better things to do – unlike Archie, who was sitting here thinking about him and what he was doing, when Barney probably hadn’t even given Archie a second thought.

Archie didn’t know why he was struggling so much recently, but he did know that he couldn’t be like this forever. He needed to do something, and yeah, sometimes talking helps and he didn’t fault Finn for being a good mate and trying to help him figure it out. But maybe this wasn’t the way.

Finn wasn’t going to probe Archie to say more, their friendship wasn’t like that. He knew there was more to Archie’s problems, but if Archie wasn’t ready then Finn wasn’t going to push him. Finn would be there for him, he only knew too well that it sometimes takes time to come to terms with how you feel.

“You heard any more about Durham, then?” University was always a good subject to talk about with Archie, he could rant on for hours about how great the facilities were, how weird and wacky the lecturers were, what a great opportunity it would be for him. Finn knew this. He knew how to keep Archie’s mind off things, even if he didn’t know how to get Archie to open up properly.

Archie gave a small sigh with relief at the mention of university. This was Finn signalling that he wasn’t going to carry on asking, which Archie was grateful for.

“Mr Pens thinks I could do it, if I keep doing what I’m doing. Mum and Dad, that’s all their hoping for, to be honest. Don’t wanna bore ya with everything about the application and interview. You found a job yet?” Bore you. That’s all Archie seemed to be doing recently. Boring everyone with his stupid problems. Problems he didn’t understand himself.

“Chopper said he could get me some work in the garage, but, ya know that’s not what I wanna do.” Finn looked over at the park as he said this. What did he want to do? He wanted Archie to tell him what’s up, that’s what he really wanted but felt like today wasn’t going to be the day.

“You’ll get there mate, I know you will. Who knows, when I come back from uni you could be the richest DJ in Stamford, eh?”

“Course I will, don’t doubt it.” Finn gave Archie a small wink, which was very reminiscent of a Chop wink, one that the gang all knew too well.

[lovemesomesurveys]

Name three feelings you’re feeling right now: Anxious, tired, meh. And the reasons for these feelings? It be like that. Have you heard of the band The Maine? Yeah. Have you ever been a featured member on any website? No. How’s your hair styled right now? It’s in a messy braid bun. Have you ever had any weird pets? My doggo has her quirks if that’s what you mean haha. She does some weird things sometimes. If you’re asking if I’d had any pets that some would find it weird to have, then no. I’ve only had dogs and fish.

Are you currently talking to/texting/instant messaging anyone? No. Have you ever experienced insomnia? I have insomnia, so yes. What’s your favorite song to listen to on repeat? I don’t tend to listen to music on repeat.  What’s your favorite song to listen to when you’re just angry at the world? I just put my Spotify on shuffle and listen to my usual music; although, I do probably tend to skip certain songs if they’re just not my vibe at the time. Do you like egg nog? Yeah. Are there any words that you just absolutely hate? The C word and the P word. Do you feel that your previous relationships were a waste of time? No. Is there a movie you’re waiting for to come out on DVD? It Chapter 2. What’s one thing you’ll never be seen without? If I’m out and about, then I always have a hat on. I’m so self-conscious about my hair right now cause it’s been so long since I last got it done and it shows. Do you drop your cell phone a lot? No. Do you have an accent? I guess everyone does, but it’s weird to think of me, just a gal from California, as having an accent. Like, it’s not distinctive like other accents where you have a pretty idea what accent it is. If I talk, people aren’t like, “Oh, she’s definitely from California.” Do you say “soda” or “pop”, or something else? Soda. Would you ever wear Converse with a prom/formal dress? No. Have you ever worn the opposite sex’s clothing? Yeah. I get men’s shirts a lot of the times in my graphic Ts cause I like how they fit. Name something you think is overrated: *shrug* Your best friend tells you they’re gay; how do you react? I would be shocked to say the least if I found out my mom was gay.  Have you ever been looking for something and it was already in your hand? Lol yes. Are you a simple or complicated person? I’m great at making things complicated. Is there anything about you that not many people know? A lot of things, probably. Does it bother you when people spell/type incorrectly on purpose? Nah, I have bigger things to worry about.  Do you listen to techno? No. What’s one thing you’d like to accomplish in your lifetime? Getting my shit together. What was the last thing you printed out on your computer? I don’t remember. Do you believe in reincarnation? No. Do you prefer hot chocolate with or without marshmallows? With. Do you like screamo music? I used to be more into it when I was like 16, but I still like some songs. How did you meet the last person who commented you on MySpace? Last awkward moment? My life. Were you mad about the way you woke up this morning? I haven’t gone to sleep, yet, but I will be extra blah cause I have to get up early. It’s almost 3AM now... whoops. What was the last thing you laughed at? Something on TV. When was the last time you had a REAL smile on your face? Earlier watching movies with my mom and brother and just chillin’ with them. Do you like getting big hugs? :] They can be nice, depending on who’s giving it. Did anything upset you today? Not so far. What’s your biggest concern right now? My usual concerns like about my health and stuff. How many different people of the opposite sex have you cried over? A few. Do you like silver or gold jewlery better? I like both. Which do you like better: Regular cakes or cookie cakes? Regular. What do you hate? That abuse and violence is a thing. Ever been to a friends house and starved the whole time? No. My friends were foodies like I was, so we always got food. Who was the last person you had a deep conversation with? My mom. Have you ever been around someone who was high? Yeah, a few people. Myself included. Do you prefer to call or text? Text. Have you ever been hit by the opposite sex? No. Do you use bandaids with cartoon characters on them? Yeah. I don’t care. Have you ever seen someone you knew and purposely avoided them? Yes. Who’s the last person you had a sleepover with? My aunt is coming to stay the weekend with us, so that’s like a sleepover. We always stay up late talking and stuff. Sometimes we play games. Do you prefer Linkin Park’s newer music, or their older music? I love both their older and newer stuff, but my favorite albums are Hybrid Theory and Meteora. If your significant other cheated on you, would you take them back? I’m single, so I don’t gotta think about that. Right now, do you prefer just dating around, or long-term relationships? If I ever find someone, I’d be looking for long term.  How many different websites are you a member on? A lot. Over my entire time online, which goes back to like 1999, I’ve joined a lot of websites. Old accounts are still floating around out there, ones I totally forgot about.  What was the last song you listened to? Lucid Dreams by Juice Wrld.  What are your plans for the holidays? Just our usual holidays traditions, which I enjoy. Is there someone that you can’t get out of your head right now? Nah.

[rearima]

Many thoughts on :re 123

I wonder if Yoriko actually expected Mutsuki? Because her reaction does imply that she’s been expecting somebody. If she had a date with Bujin I’d expect her to already show a surprised reaction upon hearing the voice/before she turned around since I’m pretty sure Mutsuki’s voice is quite different from Bujin’s. Since Mutsuki said to Bujin that she might know Touka it’s very much possible that Mutsuki directly talked to Yoriko or wanted to meet her in person to help her find her friend. It’d easy for her to gain Yoriko’s trust and lure her to some place so she could attack her...

The hand doesn’t mean that she’s dead yet. She might very well still be alive. I see two possibilities here: 1)Mutsuki killed Yoriko (maybe even in Torso style since apparently she now also hates women and since Yoriko is the best friend of the woman that stole her man, all the more reason to brutally murder her). Also because the dead don’t speak. It might be troublesome if she’s still alive and someone somehow manages to rescue her. 2)Yoriko is purposely kept alive so she can be used to threaten Touka. You know Touka would pretty much do anything to save Yoriko... oh boi... Which one is more likely? You tell me.

(btw, taking a closer look at the hand, it seems like a bone is sticking out..? Seems like Mutsuki’s definitely wasn’t too careful handling Yoriko…)

(also, stay strong, Bujin. AND SAVE YOUR WAIFU! ugh, this gets so much to me bc Yoriko is the sweetest cinnamon roll in TG. If there’s one person that never did anything bad it’d be her. How the fck could you do this to such a kind person??? )

Now let’s talk about Mutsuki. At the beginning we see her being super happy n emotional, tearing up, clenching Kaneki’s shirt and begging him to come back. I won’t call this all just being an act Mutsuki put up. There’s no denying that she was happy and emotional and really wanted him back (it was sad really, the panel where she holds the end of his shirt and begging him to come back actually got to me).

But at the same time she came with a fully thought out plan and she most likely knew how he’d react and what to expect. She acted super innocent but we know she wasn’t shocked or anything when she saw fake Kaneki getting beheaded (like pls, she seen and done worse than that). But  although she knew what to expect she still tried, still took the chance and when she got her answer(or so she thinks) you could see the hurt on her face nonetheless.

(^ that’s some Furuta style acting, Mucchan...)

What’s Mutsuki’s perception of Kaneki/Haise atm? The official statement of the CCG is that Haise betrayed them and killed Arima. There are some doubters and Urie is one of them. But not Mutsuki. She wouldn’t care much about why/how this really went down as long as he came back. It’s not about the CCG. But what might be interesting to point out here is that she did not only mention herself but also briefly mentions others (Suzuya, Itou and the Qs). I have wondered about this a long time ago: Aside from Haise, what are her feelings towards others, how are their relationships, how important are the others to her?

(putting the rest under the cut bc this gonna be long bc I’m just putting everything in one post muhahaha)

Just like how Kaneki doesn’t know that much about Mutsuki, Mutsuki doesn’t know much about Kaneki either. She genuinely thinks that she (and the other friends) don’t mean much to Kaneki, she thinks he betrayed them/their feelings, that he chose stinky ghoul over them (tho she’s a ghoul herself now) - just that plain and simple (but we know it wasn’t that simple of a decision and that there were many difficult circumstances and that they actually still mean a lot to Kaneki, despite him ultimately choosing to side with the ghouls).

And Kaneki, he doesn’t know just how (mentally) dangerous Mutsuki is now. Even after getting relentlessly attacked he’d think it’s just that they want to capture him and Mutsuki is being so aggressive bc she feels betrayed and hurt. Mutsuki having major psychological issues (and how it came to) and her having an unhealthy obsession over him - it’s something no one except herself and Uta (and to an extent Shinsanpei) know about. In his eyes, even now, Mutsuki isn’t that different from how he last remembered her. She misses him and she’s feeling super hurt and angry because he betrayed them - all still quite understandable in Kaneki’s eyes.

Scene shift to Urie, the package, Mutsuki’s room: First of all, I still wonder if she’s even trying to hide her not so normal side anymore. She should know that such display would lead ppl to suspect and start doubting her. Then why is it that this is the first thing one sees upon opening the door (which is conveniently not locked)? (and yeah some sarcastic part of me found it funny how she made dozens of copies of the same picture just so that she could stab Touka’s face some more…)

How’s Urie gonna react? He’s been in much denial until now but this? This is getting way too much outta hand and he really should do something about it. And I’m sure we’ll get that confrontation between them since Ishida especially loves to mess with Urie’s character lol… Also, I think it’s no conincident that just two chapters before we had this little meet up between the Qs (expect Aura and Mustuki) and Juuzou & Itou (bc I was kinda suprised that Mutsuki also mentions these two here). It’s likely a setup for a confrontation between Mutsuki/Aura and Urie/Qs/Juuzou/Itou. No idea how this will play out atm as we have so many different sides in this upcoming battle/arc and we’re just one chapter in. Will Urie boldly confront Mutsuki about this? Will he rather further investigate this himself? Will he seek out Saiko and the others?

(It’s probably nothing but I had thought that there might be bodyparts in the package, but then again, Urie’d smell that and it’s way too suspicious and dangerous from Mutsuki’s pov.)

Regarding the RC suppressants, the two translations are quite different.

In ms translation he flat out states that he won't be able to use his kagune now while in jaimini's translation he says "if this keeps up" whichs implies that he's not completely done for for now. It's unclear how much of suppressants is needed to make him completely unable to use the kagune or even to knock him out. Nonetheless, it will already have effect on his overall abilities of regeneration, agility etc. Ofc I want Kaneki to put up a good fight and not end up like a punching bag for Shinsanpei and get themselves in more danger than necessary. So yeah, part of me is kinda salty about how he was (not) holding himself up so far. But analytically speaking, him not being able to block another hit after realizing that there are suppressants incorporated in the weapons, it probably also has a lot to do with the effect already kicking in. I'd expect him to put up at least a better defense and be especially careful about the weapons but at this point we don't know how much he's already handicapped. Without his kagune and no physical advantages of a ghoul it's looking really bad for him... And well, he’d also have to be more determined going into this fight against his former student (even though it’s cruel to always put him in such position). (Ayato needs to get in here and repeat what he told him back in the lab about how dangerous being an half-ass is for the group.)

Touka is handling it better so far avoiding the blades. Although it's probably not consciously done as I don't think she's realized about the suppressants yet. Not sure about Touka's exact full strength atm but maybe she’d be able to get both herself and Kaneki out of danger - if she can still pull herself together that is... Will she be able to remain calm and focused? It’d be quite incredible if she can tbh... 

Mutsuki really planned that one out well. She's probably even waited for everyone else to leave the cafe before she entered (since it was shortly after Koma and Kaya left).

Also, Mutsuki's power level: When she dodged Touka's projectiles (which are super fast) we see that she's wearing a completely bored expression. That’s just... incredible. (and no, I don't think she’s got the Sharingan xD) While Mutsuki looks unchallenged Touka seems already about to go all out... Mutsuki probably only went into this after she made sure she’d win this battle.

Oh yeah btw, what the hell is your problem Shinsanpei? Your aunty-issues just came from out of nowhere. There should be more behind it imo since otherwise it doesn’t make too much sense to me, not to the extend his hatred towards Kaneki goes. (It was actually kind of Kaneki letting them live and not cutting limbs or anything. Normally, a ghoul would kill anyone who’s seen their face but Kaneki is a soft boy so he didn’t want to kill.)

(there also this whole issue regarding Mutsuki and gender in this chapter. maybe I’ll put some thought on this in another post...)

(sry about much bad english, i haven’t checked/reread this.)

[5hfanfiction]

Say You Won't Let Go - Chapter 5

It’s been almost a week since New Years and The Holy Trinity would be moving into their Miami apartment today. The girls were met early in the morning by their security team, who from now on will be with them at almost all times.

When they recorded their last album, fans found out where they studio was. During a recording session, around 100 fans waited for the girls outside. When it was time to go home, the girls were mobbed by them, they were being pushed and pulled through the crowd.

They have no problem with their fans, they love them more than anything but some managed to follow them home. In the middle of the night, someone tried to break in. Nothing serious happened, but the label now wants a security team with them for the duration of recording this album.

The head of security, Max, came to pick up the girls and take them to the airport with 2 other guards. They would be traveling with them to Miami and Max would be living in the same apartment complex as them, just in case he’s needed at any given moment.

The bodyguards loaded the Escalade with everyone’s luggage, while Normani, Dinah, and Lauren got comfy in the back.

Normani and Dinah were grumpy for being awake so early. Lauren didn’t mind because she gets to see her family today. They would land in Miami around noon and go to Taylor’s BBQ.

She looked at her phone and got even happier when she saw KC posted a new video.

“Sup pumpkins. Hope your New Year is starting off great. Enjoy the video.”

Something about her voice was very familiar, but Lauren couldn’t figure it out.

My mama don’t like you and she likes everyone. And I never like to admit that I was wrong. But I’ve been so caught up in my job, Didn’t see what’s going on. But now I know, I’m better sleeping on my own. Cuz if you like the way you look that much, Oh, baby, you should go and love yourself. And if you think that I’m still holding onto something, You should go and love yourself. You tried to make me insecure. You tried to break me, Maybe cuz you couldn’t love yourself, Love yourself. But your poison was the cure, And by accident you showed me how to love myself. Cuz if you like the way you look that much Oh, baby, you should go and love yourself And if you think that I’m still holding on to something You should go and love yourself

“Well, that’s all I have for you. Love Only!”

“Haven’t heard that voice in a while,” Dinah said. “Have you talked to her?”

“I mean, we exchange messages, but it’s not like that.”

“Because you only have eyes for Camila now?” Dinah smirked, raising an eyebrow.

“No!” Lauren quickly said.

“Yes!” Normani countered.

Maybe, Lauren thought. “I haven’t seen her since New Years,” Lauren frowned. “Ally came over a couple times and Mani went over Ally’s house. And Dinah, you went to dinner with Camila last night,” she paused thinking about the pictures of Camila with Dinah that were all over entertainment news. “Did you see the paps pictures of last night? She looks cute.”

Dinah rolled her eyes. Last night when she was out with Camila, all the Cuban talked about was Lauren. “Well, have you even asked her to chill?”

“Not really,” Lauren mumbled. “But why didn’t she come when Ally came over?”

“Ask her,” Normani said. “Communication is key!”

“You guys are no help, at all.” She focused back on her phone to message KC.

Lauren: You killed that song! Bieber who!?!?!? You write that bridge yourself? KC: lol Thnx Laur ❤ I did. Lauren: Damn, you can sing. You play multiple instruments, and you can write. What cant you do? KC: I’m going to be honest with you, I’m perfect…it often gets overshadowed by my awkwardness. Lauren: lmao sure. Why didn’t you sing more? KC: tbh I recorded that after a shit night. I just wanted to sing to let it out, you know? Lauren: Is everything okay? I know we don’t talk like that, but I’m here if anything. KC: Everything is alright, no worries. Lauren: Okie dokie, I’m here if anything 😊 but I gotta go catch a plane. Hakuna Matata ✌🏻 KC: Ah the life of a popstar. Bye Lauren 😘

“Kissy Emoji!?” Normani faked a gasp, “Who are you talking to?” she asked trying to peak at Laurens phone.

“Your girlfriend?” Dinah suggested while Lauren pushed Normani away.

“Which one,” Normani laughed.

Lauren scowled at her bandmates. “I was talking to KC, not that it’s any of your concern.”

“So girlfriend number two,” Dinah joked. “You’re supposed to text number one!”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” Lauren said annoyed with her friends teasing.

“Sure Lolo. I see you smiling at your phone like an idiot when your texting Mila…Oh, I’m sorry I mean Camz.” Dinah said playfully earning a smack by Lauren.

“Ask her why she hasn’t come see you…No! Ask her to hang out when we get to Miami. She’s going home today too,” Normani said.

“NO!” Dinah shouted. “Ask her to come to your sister’s BBQ. Your dad said to bring friends!”

“Yes! I’m going to text Ally.” Normani said excitedly.

“Wait, no. Let me talk to Camz first.”

Dinah smiled, “Okay Ralph,” she patted Lauren’s head teasingly, “You talk to Camz first.”

Lauren swatted Dinah’s hand away, and Dinah then started to ruffle Lauren’s hair. The two started pushing and shoving each other.

“We are here, girls,” Max said opening the door.

“I don’t know about these babies,” Normani said pointing at Dinah and Lauren, “but I’m a woman.” The three started laughing. They tried climbing over each other to get out of the car, which led to Normani falling out.

Max rushed to her and picked her up. “Are you alright, woman?” he jokingly asked causing more laughter.

After that, they made their way to the airport security effortlessly. There was luckily no problem with paparazzi, probably because their security shielded them well.

They were headed towards their gate when Lauren felt somebody bump into her. One of their bodyguards grabbed her making sure she didn’t fall. When she saw who it was she smiled widely. “Camz? What are you doing here?”

Camila looked up at Lauren and images of New Years flashed in her mind. She took a step away from the older girl with a terrified look. She shook her head trying to shake the thoughts.

“Lauren?” she asked. She knew Lauren would be at the airport, but she didn’t expect to run into her. Literally. “Uhhh, I gotta go!” she said and took off running.

Lauren frowned but decided to chase after her. She told Dinah and Normani to meet her at the gate. They stopped security from running after her, letting them know it was okay. Max was not happy about that.

He’d been with The Holy Trinity since they started. He always felt the need to protect them, especially Lauren. From the outside world and from herself as well. On tour when she managed to sneak off on her own, he’d always find her and make sure she was fine.

Lauren wondered why Camila was running away from her. Maybe the younger girl really didn’t want to see her. The thought made her feel guilty.

“Camila!” Lauren shouted chasing her. “I know you said you’re okay and everything, but it feels like you’re dodging me.”

“Huh? What are you talking about?” Camila said still running, looking around like crazy.

“Well for one, you are literally running away from me.” Lauren started catching up.

“Fuck!” Camila groaned, abruptly stopping. Lauren tried to stop as well but ended up tripping over her own feet and falling to the floor.

Camila bursted into laughter. “Laur, I’m not avoiding you. Trust me.” She reached her hand out and pulled Lauren up. “I was running to catch this flight but looks like it left. Ally really had to use the bathroom, I was going to hold the plane for her.”

“I’m not sure that’s how it works,” Lauren laughed. “I don’t think you can just hold a plane.”

“Sounds pretty ridiculous now that I think about it,” Camila giggled. Talking and laughing with Lauren felt so good, but she can’t get the image of angry Lauren out of her head.

“I’ll call her,” Lauren suggested after she noticing Camila’s silence while she looked deep in thought. She took out her phone and dialed Ally.

“Lauren?” Ally picked up confused.

“Yeah, hey I’m with Camila. You guys missed your flight, but me and the girls are headed to Miami, so you can fly with us.”

“Um, okay? Is there room on your flight?”

Lauren just laughed, “Yeah, stay where you are. Me and Camz are coming to you,” With that Lauren hung up. She looked at Camila who was looking around the airport and reached her hand out to get her attention. Camila flinched away the moment Lauren touched her.

“I’m sorry,” Lauren said quickly. She realized how afraid Camila was of her. Even though Camila may say she’s okay, there’s still a part of her that is scared of Lauren.

Camila shrugged, “I just wasn’t expecting you to touch me. I’m sorry.” She didn’t understand what was happening, why she was so scared of Lauren. Sure, they had a little fight but she thought she was over it. They talked a bit since then, everything seemed fine until actually seeing Lauren.

Lauren hated that Camila feared her, but decided to ignore it and tried to make the moment lighter, “Wanna race to Ally?”

Camila smile and nodded. “I’ll beat you, that’s for sure.”

“Oh yeah? Then let’s make it interesting…If I win you have to let me take you out.” Lauren suggested.

Camila rolled her eyes, “Fine whatever. If I win, you have to announce your undying love for me to the world.”

Lauren thought for a moment, “Management will not like that, so fuck it…GO!” She took off running.

Camila and Lauren ran through the airport with Lauren in the lead the whole time. They almost made it to Ally when Camila shrieked, “Ow!” she stopped running and gripped her ankle. “Lo, wait up. I hurt myself.”

Lauren stopped immediately and jogged back towards Camila, “What happened? Are you okay?” she said concern laced in her voice.

Camila started laughing, “You’re such a sucker.” She took off running, leaving Lauren stunned.

Camila got to Ally first and was ecstatic, while Lauren was pouting telling her she cheated. The three girls made their way to the gate where Normani and Dinah were waiting.

“Damn dawg, took you long enough,” Dinah said impatiently. “I’m trying to sleep on this plane.”

“These two missed their flight, so they are coming with us,” Lauren explain.

“Yay! Are they coming to Tay’s BBQ?” Normani asked.

Lauren looked at Camila and Ally, “Wanna come to my sister’s BBQ? It’s literally only going to be my family, nothing big.”

“Yes!” Ally exclaimed.

“I have to go visit my little sister, and I wouldn’t want to intrude,” Camila replied timidly.

“Mila bring Sofi! She’s probably The Holy Trinity’s biggest fan!” Ally begged.

“Aw, yeah bring her! Dinah is used to children because of her 1000 siblings. And Lolo, she turns into a little ball of mush around kids.” Normani added.

“My dad said to bring my friends, so it’s no intrusion. Please,” Lauren pleaded giving Camila her best puppy eyes, and pout.

It made Camila’s heart flutter, she bit her lip and nodded.

“Great! Let’s get going,” Lauren ordered.

The five girls walked outside going to the private plane, Dinah took that time to take pictures. Once inside Ally and Camila marveled at how beautifully sleek the inside was. Neither girl ever flying in something like this before.

Ally quickly took a picture before all the girls got seated and posted it on twitter.

Camila laid on a sofa near the back of the plane, Lauren sat in a chair across from her. In front of them, Ally, Dinah, and Normani sat at a table. And near the pilot’s cabin in front sat the three bodyguards.

When seated before takeoff Dinah decided to post a picture on twitter for the fans.

@DinahJane: I miss your faces, but Miami here we come ✈️✈️

@LaurenJauregui: @AllyBrooke Get off my plane.. #StrangerDanger 🆘 @NormaniKordei: @LaurenJauregui Leave @AllyBrooke alone. 😡 @DinahJane: @NormaniKordei @LaurenJauregui @AllyBrooke Why don’t you include me in conversations? I’m feeling unloved. @LaurenJauregui: @DinahJane Probably because no one loves you.

Lauren laughed at her phone making Camila glance at her to see what’s funny. She assumed it had something to with Dinah because she heard the Polynesian shouting at Lauren shortly after.

“Excuse me, but I think you have a love to confess,” Camila said innocently.

“You cheated Cabello. I’m not doing it,” Lauren said.

“Lauren Michelle! You know damn well if you would’ve cheated and won, you’d make me go on a date. Stop being a punk ass and post a tweet about how whipped you are,” Camila demanded.

“You don’t even have twitter,” Lauren grumbled.

Camila looked at Lauren wide-eyed. She had told the older girl earlier that she didn’t have any social media, but truth is KC did. “Not the point.”

Lauren sighed, “Fine.” Camila did a small victory dance in her seat.

@AllyBrooke: dMac I love you 💕 @DinahJane @NormaniKordei: 🙁 and Me? @AllyBrooke. @AllyBrooke: With all my heart. 💗 @NormaniKordei @DinahJane: and no one loves @LaurenJuargui @LaurenJauregui: I don’t need any of you @NormaniKordei @DinahJane @Allybrooke. I have something much better. 😍 @LaurenJauregui: My future baby mama 💛 #CamilaCabello

“I fucking ship it!” Dinah shouted to the two girls in the back.

Camila laughed and assumed Lauren must’ve said something on twitter. “Were you nice?” Camila asked Lauren.

“Aren’t I always, babe?” Lauren smirked.

“Not your babe, Jauregui.” Camila shook her head. “Hey Laur, what’s your favorite color? I read once that your favorite color plays a hand in your personality and behavior.”

Before Lauren can answer Camila rambled on, “You seem like a blue kind of person! Calming and cool. Charming and peaceful. I never thanked you for helping me through my little panic attack. See! Calming. So am I right?” Camila said in one breath.

Lauren bit her lip to suppress her smile, she thought Camila’s random rambling was adorable. Camila is adorable. Though she didn’t have a favorite color, she didn’t want to disappoint Camila who was sitting there excited and eager. “Yes, I love blue.”

“Ah, I knew it.” Camila smiled.

“If I’m so cool and charming, go on a date with me,” Lauren said, her phone buzzing in her hand.

Mani👑: Why you lying? DMac💖: Yeah dawg, your favorite color is not blue! Lolo: Stop snooping… but did you hear how excited she was? Lolo: It’s my favorite color now, I’m never gonna look at blue the same. 💙

Camila heard a loud “Aw” from the girls in the front. She shook it off, and went back to thinking about what Lauren said. Is she crazy for constantly rejecting Lauren?

She wanted badly to just say yes, and leave her heart out of it because she knew Lauren probably just wanted sex. That’s not what Camila was looking for. She wanted to meet someone and fall in love. Make love, not just fuck.

“I didn’t mean to make you anxious or something,” Lauren spoke softly.

Camila looked at her confused, and Lauren pointed to Camila’s stomach. The younger girl must have started scratching it subconsciously while in thought.

Before Camila could say anything, her phone started buzzing.

Shawn: Wtf. Why is Ally tweeting the holy trinity and why is lauren calling you her future baby mama Mila🐨: Maaaan I can’t even begin to explain to you what the fuck has been happening. Shawn: Well when you come over with Sof you gots some explaining to do lol

“Fuck,” she muttered.

“What’s wrong?” Lauren asked.

“I told Shawn I’d hang out with Sofi at his house. Whatever I’ll just tell him I have something else to do.”

Lauren felt unexplainably jealous at the second mention of this Shawn person, “Why don’t you invite him?” she suggested wanting to get a look at her competition.

“What? Are you sure? I don’t want to like be intruding family time.”

“Chill Camz, you can invite that person. You’re not intruding, trust me. Truthfully, I wanted to invite you earlier, but you hadn’t seen me all week and I didn’t want to seem like a creep.” Lauren admitted.

“Because asking me out every day is less creepy?” Camila joked.

Lauren laughed, “I’m not giving up.”

Camila laughed and shook her head refocusing on her phone.

Mila🐨: About that…wanna go to the park? Shawn: Sure Mila Mila🐨: with Ally.. Shawn: Yeah..? Mila🐨: and The Holy Trinity Shawn: What the fuck?! Are you serious? Mila🐨: so serious Shawn: dude, you really have to explain all this, but yeah I’ll go

For the rest of flight Camila slept, as well as Dinah and Normani. Ally watched a movie, and Lauren had a sketchbook and drew Camila sleeping. Lauren always like to paint and draw, but since being on tour and everything she didn’t do it often.

Lauren didn’t understand what made her so drawn to the younger girl. When Camila had the panic attack, Lauren just wanted to make sure she was safe. And now that she knows she hurt Camila more than just physically, it hurts her heart. This one girl is making her crazy, and it’s only been a couple days.

When they landed in Miami, the five girls were ambushed by fans. Dinah’s selfie and their interactions on twitter clearly didn’t go unnoticed. They tried to say hello to as many fans as possible before a swarm paparazzi came.

The paps mainly asked questions about Camila being Laurens girlfriend, making Lauren smirk. Camila didn’t expect one twit pic would turn into this much of a big deal.

The girls had two black Escalades picking them up from the airport. Dinah suggested Lauren and Camila go pick up Shawn and Sofi, while the rest go straight to Lauren’s house.

Lauren was more than excited to spend time alone with Camila. She wanted to get to know more about her. Day after day Lauren found herself wanting more. What started off as wanting to undress Camila’s body, turned into wanting to undress her mind. Finding out everything there is to know about the younger Cuban.

“You ladies ready to go?” Max asked as Camila and Lauren settled in the back of the car. He, of course, decided to drive Lauren and Camila.

“Just don’t drive too fast,” Camila spoke quietly.

Cars make her uncomfortable. In the limo with The Holy Trinity, she didn’t want the girls to think she was any weirder by mentioning her car anxieties so she just tried not thinking about it. Now in the car with just Lauren, she felt different.

“Don’t worry, Miss. You’re in good hands,” Max smiled and started to drive off.

“You’re scared of cars?” Lauren asked.

“Something like that,” she answered.

Lauren didn’t push it. She looked down at Camila’s hands, wanting badly to hold them. She knew that the younger girl would pull away out of fear. She hated herself for making Camila scared.

She took a deep breath, “I’m sorry,” she whispered.

Camila turned to her shocked, “What are you apologizing for?”

“Can I hold your hand?” she asked, she didn’t look up.

Camila tilted her head a little, she reached her hand out to touch Lauren’s face. The older girl closed her eyes at the contact. When they opened, she locked eyes with Camila, who smiled. “It’s not you, Lo. Well, it’s not only you.” Camila dropped her hand from Laurens’ face to her hand, interlocking their fingers. “Me being scared, it’s more than just about you. I don’t want you to hold it against yourself.”

“I’m very sorry,” Lauren dropped her gaze again.

“I know, Lo,” Camila said.

They sat quietly for a bit. That moment between them felt intimate, but Camila decided to ruin it. She picked up her hand that was attached to Laurens, “And don’t think this means anything.” She waved their hands in front of her. “Don’t believe the paparazzi, I’m not your girlfriend,” she joked.

Lauren laughed, “Damn Cabello, you’re ice cold. I’m here being vulnerable and shit.”

“I know, you almost had me,” Camila said letting go of Lauren. “If only that was the side of you I met first.”

Lauren bit her lip, “I’m still going to win you over. I’m going to prove to you that I’m not this drunken monster. It was a slip-up, one I’ll never let happen again. I’m going show you that I’m more than one night stands like you think I am.”

Camila smiled and looked out the window. She tried to ignore the butterflies erupting in her stomach, “You can be very cute when you’re not being pretentious.”

“I know, but that cute side of me I’ll reserve only for you,” Lauren smirked.

“Okay, okay. Now you’re just trying to sweet talk me. Take those phony lines elsewhere.” Camila rolled her eyes making Lauren laugh loudly.

The rest drive to the Cabello house was short, filled with comfortable conversation. When they pulled up, Camila stared out the window for a moment. Hoping that everything would go okay. Minimal conversation with her father. She closed her eyes rubbing her temples, thinking about the flashback she had the other night.

Lauren noticed Camila’s apprehension. “Are you okay?” she asked.

“Yeah, yeah. Just a little headache. Okay, I’ll be back in a minute.”

“Do you want me to come with you?”

“No! No, that’s quite okay. Alright, I’m going now.”

Lauren didn’t understand why Camila looked so uneasy. Maybe she hasn’t been home in a while, perhaps she’s just nervous. When Camila stepped out of the car, Lauren looked at her up and down. Her eyes looking at every curve her body did. Camila had the nicest body Lauren has ever seen.

Camila turned to say something to Lauren and noticed her blatant staring. “Eyes up here Jauregui. Jeez, I’m literally just in leggings and a t-shirt.”

“You don’t have to try, babe. Your body is close to perfection,” she said smoothly.

“Yeah, yeah. Not your babe.”

“One day, Cabello. Let a girl dream.”

Camila turns towards her house. She takes a deep breath and walks down the path to the front door. Lauren watched her from the car window. She laughed when Camila tripped slightly.

“Well, you seem smitten,” Max spoke up.

Lauren smiled, “I don’t know what it is about her.”

“I haven’t seen you like this in a while. It suits you,” he smiled.

“Max, don’t become a big softie,” Lauren joked making him laugh.

He was a buff guy, ex-marine. He was in his late 40’s with light orange hair that was graying. He had a deep gritty voice, and hearing him talk about this was weird to Lauren.

Camila stood in front of her house thinking of all the possibilities that could happen when she sees her dad. She barely rings the doorbell before it swings open.

“Kaki!” Sofi said with an angry face.

“Hey princess,” Camila bends down to greet her sister.

“No! I’m still mad at you,” Sofi frowned.

Camila felt a pang in her chest, “I’m sorry baby, Ally really wanted me to go to Texas. I can make it up to you. We are going to the park, and I have a surprise. It’s in that car over there.” Camila points to the car, “But first here this is for you.” She gave her sister a little box.

Sofi wasted no time quickly unwrapping and opening the gift. It was a silver bracelet that read “Sofia” with a tiara charm. “I love it. I’m still mad at you, but less mad. I’m going to tell Papi I’m leaving with you, then I’ll go get my other surprise in the car.”

“Good idea, Sof.”

Camila was relieved that her dad didn’t come to the door. Sofi came back and had the bracelet on while playing with the charm. “Papi said you better bring me back in one piece. – Ok, so what’s the next surprise Kaki!” Sofi beamed.

“You’ll see when you get to the car,” Camila said.

Sofi ran to the car with Camila chasing behind her. She opened the door and her mouth dropped. She looked at Camila and back at Lauren. “Lauren Jauregui?! You got me Lauren? Ok Kaki, I’m not mad at you anymore.”

Lauren and Camila started laughing. “Well, I didn’t go out and buy you a personal Lauren Jauregui. But we are going to be hanging out with her today. And her family. And Ally…and Normani. And Dinah.”

“DINAH AND NORMANI! AND LAUREN!? – YOU GOT ME THE HOLY TRINITY?” Sofi exclaimed.

“Ally said you were our biggest fan, and I just needed to meet you!” Lauren smile picking Sofi up and placing her on her lap.

Sofi hugged her tightly, “Best late Christmas ever!”

Camila was about to enter the car when she heard shouting from down the street. “Yo, Koala!” She looked to see who was yelling and saw Shawn walking to her. She took off towards him, jumping into his arms praying that he catches her. He did, and she gave him one of her Koala hugs that he was referring to.

“Did ya miss me,” she smiled climbing off him.

“Naaaaah,” he joked. “So, they’re in there?” He was nervous about meeting the pop stars.

“Just Lauren, she’s awesome,” Camila smiled looking back at the car.

Shawn looked at her, “Ooooh. Does Mila have a crush?” he smirked.

Camila rolled her eyes. “A little,” finally admitting what everyone knew.

Lauren watched their interaction from the car. Camila laughing and smiling with this guy made her envious. He was wearing a black jersey, handing Camila a matching one that she threw on over clothes.

“Hey Sofi,” she said. “Who’s that with Camila.”

Sofi looked out the window, “Oh that’s Shawn. They are best friends, but he loooves her.”

Who wouldn’t love Camila, she was the perfect amount of cute and dorky. Lauren shook her head and refocused on talking to Sofi.

After telling Shawn about everything that had happened and making sure he doesn’t tell them that she is KC, they made their way to the car. Camila opened the door and noticed Lauren was a little off. “Lauren, are you okay? Did Sofi do something?”

Lauren smiled, “No, she’s my favorite Cabello.”

“Haha,” Sofi said sticking her tongue out at Camila. “Lauren’s my best friend.”

“That’s right!” Lauren moved Sofi next to her and put the seat belt on.

Camila rolled her eyes and introduced Shawn to Lauren. Shawn felt intimidated by Lauren, and it didn’t help that she was glaring at him. Everyone got settled in the car, and Max began to drive to Lauren’s house. He redirected himself after Lauren got a call telling her everyone was on the way to the park.

Camila couldn’t help but feel like something was bothering Lauren. Shawn would try to make small talk, but she was barely talking. Sofi did all the talking, excitedly telling stories about her winter break.

The car pulled up to the park and Sofi excitedly hopped on Lauren’s lap again. “Are Dinah and Normani here?”

Lauren peeked out the window, spotting her bandmates dancing with Ally on the field. Her parents and siblings were laughing, sitting at a picnic table watching the show. She laughed shaking her head, “Yes baby, they are dancing. Wanna join them?” she asked Sofi, who nodded vigorously.

Max helped everyone out of the car, and Lauren pulled him aside.

“Can you do me a huge favor?” she smiled brightly.

He sighed, “I know you think I’m your servant—”

“No Max, I know you’re my bodyguard. I also know that for the last 4 years you’ve grown close to us and you love us like your own.”

He huffed, “What do you want?” and Lauren grinned.

Camila, Shawn, and Sofi stood by the car waiting for Lauren to talk to Max. Shawn was holding Sofi, spinning her around and tickling her. Camila’s eyes wandered to Lauren and she watched the older girl. She admired her curves and perfect face. Whenever Lauren smiled, it made Camila get butterflies.

She walked over to the two, “What’s the holdup?”

Max excused himself leaving the girls to talk.

“Nothing beautiful,” Lauren said making the younger girl blush. “Aw, you’re blushing. Does that mean you like me?”

“No!” Camila said quickly. “Why were you so weird in the car?”

“No reason,” Lauren said dryly. She glanced over to Shawn.

Camila followed her gazed and smirked, “You’re jealous!”

Lauren’s eyes widened, “Of that guy? No, no.”

Camila poked her stomach, “Admit it.”

Lauren rolled her eyes, “Have you seen me? I’m not jealous.”

“Oh, I see you, Jauregui! And you look jealous.”

“Whatever, come on,” Lauren started walking away. “You have to meet your future in-laws,” she smirked and Camila suddenly felt nervous.

It’s going to be a long afternoon, she thought.