#I like to believe Michael made trash and the gang himself

[chloesimaginationthings]

The FNAF movie duo learn about trash and the gang

[weclassybouquetfun]

THE FLASH has arrived after being a tad delayed.

But what's 5 years and 3 months amongst friends.

Congrats to Andrés "Andy" Muschietti

for getting this film across the finishing line. A s though there's reportedly a sequel script in play and Muschietti said that he would dream of replacing Ezra Miller in a subsequent film his assurance may be moot as THE FLASH signals the end of the DCEU while BLUE BEETLE will usher in the DC Universe under James Gunn.

But good news for Muschietti; he had been tapped to direct BATMAN: THE BRAVE AND THE BOLD.

No, not this cartoon beauty

The live-action adaptation of the Grant Morrison run.

For me, THE FLASH is the perfect swan song for the DCEU. Go out in style, Barry!

SPOILERS FOR THE FLASH (despite everyone and their grandmas posting spoilers all across social media to either trash the F/X or to spite an Ezra Miller fronted project). Yes, I have made hating spoilers a large part of my personality.

THE GOOD

-Ezra Miller was a delight. I loved the dual iterations of Barry. As current day Bruce says their scars (maybe he said traumas) are what made them. Of course a Barry who was raised by his parents ends up with a different personality than a Barry who was scarred by his mother's murder and father's incarceration. He had to grow up fast yet remained socially stunted as he was consumed with getting justice for his father. I think it would get tiresome real quick if the film were just quirky/awkward Barry. We got grounded Barry and that other side.

-It was a nice touch when he does the messaging to the nurse that she should seek professional help after such a jarring event but the JL themselves haven't figured that out for themselves yet.

-I don't believe I have ever read a Flash standalone so maybe all of these themes were covered in his issues but there were certainly strains of Booster Gold Vol. 2 and Flashpoint in this. Alt!Barry repeatedly turning back time to try to save Supergirl and Batman and failing was exactly like Booster Gold trying to save Barbara Gordon from being shot and paralyzed by the Joker. Each time she would still get shot and Booster himself would be pulverized by the Joker Gang until Rip Hunter stopped him and let him know that event was a fixed point that couldn't be changed. It had to happen.

And Flashpoint where Barry wakes up to a new universe and tries to get back to the standard timeline but instead ends up and remains in a new universe similar but different from his own.

Which leads to -

-Batmans!!! I still don't know what makes a good Batman, but I do know what makes a good Bruce Wayne and Val Kilmer and Ben Affleck is that for me so I delighted in seeing him again. So fantastic that all these years later Michael Keaton gets his swan song.

As Barry tells Bruce things change across multiverses but there are constants such as Bruce having a Alfred as it is fated. But there is also, seemingly, the constant that Bruce is defined by being Batman. In THE DARK KNIGHT RISES he doesn't return to Bruce Wayne but instead ducks out of society until Gotham is truly threatened and only bows out when he is assured that Gotham is in good hands. In THE FLASH Bruce cleans up Gotham and retreats to a hermetic existence until Barry coaxes him out. He dies happily in battle as Batman, a better death than just dying as the pedestrian Bruce Wayne.

And as I love reaching back to the past and closing circles seeing George Clooney as Bruce was amazing.

Talk about reaching back-

-I LOVED THE REIMAGING OF CHRISTOPHER REEVES' SUPERMAN! I bow down to poorly rendered CGI G.O.A.T Superman.

This is the man who said, "I think I was the right actor for the part at the time I played it, but I think the role is larger than any particular actor and should be reinterpreted from generation to generation."

How fitting that so many reinterpretations were presented, including the payoff of the Eric Stoltz BACK TO THE FUTURE jokes.

Just as Stoltz was the Marty McFly that never really was, we got Nic Cage's near Superman reference!!

He exists in the multiverse!

and yeah, we saw other Flashes but who cares when there is Supermen...and Helen Slater's Supergirl!

Another trip through the multiverse was done courtesy of TITANS where Gar

-The humour wasn't overkill. Loved how they did the slow reveal of Bruce being tied to the Lasso of Truth. It seemed OOC for him to be bashful around Diana but I went with it, but no need; he was just lassoed. I hope people caught him chastising himself for not donating his wealth to help the poor.

-Loved Sasha Calle's Kara. Would have loved to see more of her.

-Barry's stakes only work if the audience cares and how much did I love Maribel Verdú as Nora Allen. It would not have worked if we couldn't feel the depth of Barry's loss. Verdú was so loving and vibrant that my heart ached that Barry couldn't save her.

Verdú, Temeura Morrison (who appears), Jesse L. Martin of TV's THE FLASH and these hotties are the best parents in the DCEU.

-Nice seeing Muschietti's pal and MAMA lead Nikolaj Coster-Waldau play a rando who has his pizza snagged by Barry and Muschietti himself playing a man who gets his hot dog snatched by Barry.

-Speaking of dogs that end credits with the therapy dog in free fall was a perfect clincher to the prior mad scene with the babies in the forefront. And for those bashing the egregiously fake babies in that scene I think it would have created anxiety for plenty of people if they CGI'd actual babies. The comedic element of such lunacy works because they're so fake looking.

THE BAD

-Kiersey Clemons getting short-shrift.

If there isn't a sequel it's very disappointing how little she has to do. I would have loved to see their friendship flourish.

Also, does this film retcon the deleted scene which was reinstated in the Snyder cut of JUSTICE LEAGUE?

Seemingly, no as she says she feels like she has seen Barry lately and he cagily denies it, but it's not as if Iris had a head injury or was knocked out during that scene. How can you not remember someone saving your life? Unless the implication is that Barry was moving so fast that she only got a glimpse of him, which...doubtful.

-Which brings me to my second issue..

THE REST

-The issue with the Flash as a standalone is that is really serves to showcase Batman and to a lesser extent Supergirl. They Captain America: Civil War'red the film!

But maybe that's just because as a character Barry isn't that compelling. His #1 enemy is just a reverse of himself. Barry is a hero but also an unwitting agent of chaos as his defining trait is not the speed force but upending the universe in a quest to save his mother,

so maybe there isn't enough meat on the bone so to speak character-wise to delve deeper but if they could do it with Aquaman then Barry deserved a deeper exploration.

-I don't think we needed the angle that Barry was at the scene of Zod's attack and he has kicks himself over not being able to save the kid's dad. He has enough of a complex.

-This could very well be because I have an unreasonable dislike of Ron Livingston but what a downgrade from Billy Crudup (who was too busy with AppleTV+'s THE MORNING SHOW to return).

Crudup's scenes in JL were infinitely more effective than anything Livingston eked out in this.

Just as Crudup had a minor role in JUSTICE LEAGUE, but made a big impression, Luke Brandon Field appeared in one ep of AMC+'s wonderful INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE but I clocked him immediately in his small role as a criminal Bruce takes down.

[berryberrydairy]

Decided to write down my headcanons for William and Michael :)

William Afton headcanons:

He's the eldest in his family. He has a younger brother named Vincent. (sounds familiar?)

His father was abusive to him and his brother. He was always there to protect his brother from his father.

Secretly had a pet rabbit as a kid but one day his father killed it after he found out about the rabbit. Starting from that day, he hates the concept of death.

He knew about remnants for such a long time but never gave a damn about it. The first time he found out about it was when he visited the library with Michael and was helping him with his school project.

He only did research on remnants after his wife died. He wanted to make his family immortal. He hates death.

He became negligent as he was absorbed with his research.

He was never abusive towards his children before the death of his wife. He never hurt them physically, mentally or even neglect them as he loves his children equally. A good man can turn into a bad person really quick.

Like the book stated, he knew what he was doing was wrong. Murdering children and neglecting his children to the point of two of them dying but he told himself that he was doing this for his children's own good. He also fears being dead.

He knew Elizabeth possessed Circus Baby. He didn't let anyone shock Circus Baby. The reason why the controlled shock for Circus Baby didn't work in SL is because William broke it so nobody can hurt Elizabeth.

Named himself Dave Miller so he could work at one of the pizzerias. He had his hat covered his eyes whenever he is around Fritz Smith.

The only time he ever laid his hands on Michael was when Michael and him had their first big argument before William disappeared to dismantle the animatronics.

He actually treasured Michael and wanted to protect Michael from death and wanted his son to follow his footsteps but all of that were gone when he found out that his son was trying to get rid of him. (FNAF 3, Michael is the security guard)

Michael Afton headcanons:

Wants to become a robot inventor like Henry and William. He placed both of them on a pedestal.

He loved to tease his siblings to the point of making them cry but he tried his best to calm the younger children down.

He loves his siblings and was always there to protect them.

He was cheerful and energetic as a child but after his mother passed away with his father neglecting him and his siblings, he became an angry person.

He took out his anger on his brother by bullying him.

Once he thought of hurting Elizabeth due to her, what Mike would say, brat-ness but Evan stopped him and reminded him that Elizabeth was really younger than them both.

His anger mellowed down after Evan's death. He felt guilty for treating his siblings like an absolute crap when he was supposed to be there for them as his father was never present.

He was helping around in Circus Baby Pizza World and he was also supposed to be paying attention to Elizabeth but he got so busy, he lost sight of her.

He is now ridden by guilt for his siblings' death.

He became quiet, serious and can be sarcastic towards others. Though he was friendly towards his neighbours.

He had a huge argument with William before William disappeared to dismantle the animatronics at one of the pizzerias. That was the only time he let out all the emotions and problems he kept inside him about his father’s negligence.

Like in the book, he likes to scribble on the logbook but also he also enjoys painting and doing proper illustrations on his sketchbook.

Trash and the gangs were made by him. (New Beginning)

He has anxiety and paranoia, but that might be hinted as canon.

I believe that Fritz Smith was Michael when he was 18 years old trying to find a job to kill some times.

Michael ate a soap as a child thinking it'd taste like fruit.

He was hospitalised a lot as a child because of broken bones. God knows how he survived until now.

[kimoralov3]

Best Friend's Brother

Requested By: Anonymous

Word Count: 2055

Pairing: Sam Wilson x fem!black!reader

Warnings: Swearing like a lot of it

(Y/N)'s POV

"AJ, Cass, help me bring these sheets and stuff to the extra bedroom upstairs." Sarah said as she poked her head in the kitchen.

"Why are you setting up the extra bedroom room?" I asked as I munch on a slice of cornbread.

"Sam is coming back home and he's bringing a friend." Sarah explained as pointed the boys in the direction of the linen closet.

"Wait, Sam's coming back?" I asked as I looked up at her.

"Yeah. (Y/N), I told you this like a week ago. Do you not remember?" Sarah asked, a hint of a smirk playing at her lips as she walked over to me.

"Oh, right! Sorry, I must've forgotten. What time is he getting here?" I asked as I sat up straight.

"Sometime later today. He said that he was gonna stop by the docks to check on the boats before he got here though. You should meet him there."

"Why exactly should I do that?"

Sarah gave me a look that said 'I ain't stupid' before answering me. "Don't play dumb, (Y/N). I remember how much you used to talk about how you liked him, and how you wished you could just gain the courage to ask him out. And judging by how you reacted just now, I'm guessing that those feelings haven't disappeared just yet."

"I hate how smart you can be sometimes." I huffed out as I rested my head on the counter. Sarah chuckled before patting me on the back.

"You should tell him. You can't keep stuff like this bottled up forever."

"But what if he rejects me? I couldn't bear the embarrassment." I mumbled as I turned to rest my cheek flat against the counter.

"Well then you accept it and move on. But I highly doubt that you'll get rejected." Sarah said as she went to go help the boys.

"What's that supposed to mean?" I asked as I leaned my head up.

"You'll find out eventually!" Sarah yelled from upstairs. I groaned, rubbing my face before going home.

----

Sam's POV

"So you have a sister?" Bucky asked as he looked at me.

"Yeah, why?" I asked as I looked at him suspiciously. Bucky just gave me a smirk and shrugged. "Oh no, I know that look. Keep that cyborg arm of yours away from my sister."

"I make no promises, Sam. Anybody else that I should know before we get there?"

"Well, yeah there's Sarah's best friend, (Y/N). Haven't seen her in a while, though." I rambled as I pulled up to the docks.

"So you have a crush on your sister's best friend? Pretty sure there's some type of rule against that." Bucky said as we got out the car.

"Woah now, who said anything about me having a crush on (Y/N)?" I asked as I got my tool box from the trunk.

"The way you talk about her suggests that you do. You saying that you don't?" Bucky asked as he followed me onto the boat. I shook my head, making my way towards the engine.

"You're seeing shit man. That's my little sister's best friend, why would I wanna be with her?"

"She could probably walk in here right now and you'd start grinning like the Cheshire Cat." Bucky said as he handed me a screwdriver.

"Are you gonna help me fix the boat or are you just gonna stand there and talk about what you think is going on in my love life?"

----

(Y/N)'s POV

Today's the day I guess. I thought as I hopped into my car. I texted Sarah that I was on my way and started the engine. During my drive, I let my thoughts run. Does he still look the same? Does he even remember me? Probably not. Whenever I saw him coming I'd run the other way. He probably thinks I'm a weirdo, and doesn't see me beyond his sister's best friend.

I shouldn't even be worrying about this. I sighed, stopping the car in front of the Wilson's house. I took a moment to compose myself before grabbing my phone and getting out of the car. I grabbed the pot of greens out the passenger seat and walked up the porch, knocking on the door. The door opened to reveal Sam standing there in a black turtleneck. Well fuck me.

"Hey (Y/N), it's good to see you!" Sam said as he pulled me into a hug. He smelled like a fresh baked batch of snickerdoodles, with extra sugar and cinnamon. I could get used to this. I gave him a smile once he pulled away.

"It's good to see you too, Sam! Man, you've gotten taller." I joked as I looked up at him.

"That, and you've always been on the shorter side. Here, let me take that for you." He said as he reached for the pot of greens. I said a small thank you and followed him into the house. "Sarah, (Y/N) is here!" He yelled up the stairs.

Sarah came into the kitchen, followed by a tall buff guy in a navy blue long sleeved shirt. "What's with everyone wearing long sleeves today? Y'all are aware that we're in Louisiana during the middle of the summer, right?" I said as I pointed between the two of them.

"Just got back from the mountains, still a little cold. The name's Bucky, by the way. It's nice to meet you." He introduced himself as he held his hand out for me to shake. I did and smiled at him.

"Nice to meet you too, I'm (Y/N). So, how long are you staying?"

"Just a few days, I gotta get back to New York." He explained as he leaned against the counter.

"Well, I hope you enjoy your stay. I gotta take the boys to the library to work on a school project, but I'll see y'all later." I waved goodbye, taking one more glance at Sam - maybe for a bit too long - before helping the boys into my car.

----

Sam's POV

I watched as (Y/N) left with the boys. Damn it, I should've said something. "So that's (Y/N)? I see why you like her, Sam." Bucky said once the door was shut and locked.

"Damn Sam, even Bucky can tell you're head over heels for her. You been gushing about her to everyone you come across?" Sarah said as she chopped up some vegetables.

"So y'all both ganging up on me now? That's cold."

"Nah, what's cold is you holding onto your feelings for almost 20 years now. Even after I told you at prom that she had feelings for you." Sarah said as she waved the knife around.

"First of all, stop swinging that knife around before you poke somebody eye out. Second of all, how was I supposed to know that you were telling the truth? Especially when she gets with some guy the next week?"

"So you believed that she really liked Michael after how much she used to trash talk him?"

"I don't know Sam, you seem to be the idiot in this situation. Although I'm sure that's a role you're used to fulfilling." Bucky said as he stole a carrot.

"First of all fuck you," I said as I pointed at Bucky. "And second of all, yeah maybe I was an idiot for not realizing that they were a fishy couple, but what's the point in saying something now? Like you said it's been years, and I highly doubt that she still has feelings for me. So we should just drop it. Alright?" I looked between the two of them. Sarah was looking at me like I was the biggest idiot in the world while Bucky just seemed amused by the whole situation.

"Sam, did you not see the way she was looking at you? She might as well have ran across the room and kissed you right then and there." Sarah explained as she turned her full attention towards me.

"Y'all are seeing shit. Can we just drop it? Please?" They both agreed to leave it alone, moving on to their own things. There's no way she could still have feelings for me. Right? Yeah, that's crazy.

----

C'mon, how can you get lost getting to the docks that are only 10 minutes away. I checked my watch again, groaning in frustration. Bucky said that he'd be here at 2:30, but it was nearing 3:15 and I was growing impatient. "Bucky Barnes, I'm gonna beat your ass the next time I see you." I mumbled as I looked around the docks.

"Sam?" Someone called from behind me. I turned around to see (Y/N) walking towards me.

"Oh, hey. What are you doing here?"

"Sarah texted me and said that she wanted me to help her with something. Are you down here to fix the boat?"

"Yeah. Bucky is supposed to be helping me, but he's almost an hour late."

"Sarah told me that he was watching the boys while we were working here." (Y/N) said as she looked at me. That's weird, why would they tell us to meet here if - oh God. "They told us to meet here because they want us to talk to each other. Dammit Sarah."

"Talk to each other? About what?"

----

(Y/N)'s POV

"About what?" Sam asked. If Sarah would've told me what she was planning I'd be a bit more prepared for this situation. Or run away. Yeah, I'd probably run away.

"About us, I guess."

"What about us?" He seemed to be confused, and that was honestly making it worse. How am I supposed to tell my best friend's brother that I've been in love with him since we were in high school? I sat down on a bench for a moment before speaking up.

"Look, I'm just gonna be honest with you," I started out. He nodded, signaling for me to continue and crossed his arms. His muscles just keep getting bigger and bigger. "I like you. I've liked you since we were in high school. Honestly, I'm not sure if this counts as just a crush anymore because I'm probably in love with you. I understand if you don't feel the same way, but Sarah keeps telling me that I should tell you. So I'm doing that now."

It was silent for a moment before Sam let out a chuckle. Then another, and another until he was full on laughing. Was me liking him that funny? "I'm sorry, I'm not laughing at you, I'm laughing at myself. Man, can't believe Sarah and Bucky were right."

"I'm sorry, I'm a bit confused here. Right about what?"

"About me being an idiot for not realizing that you like me back." Sam said as he sat beside me. It took me a moment to process what he was saying.

"Wait, you like me too?" I asked softly. Sam smiled, giving me a nod.

"Yeah, I do. Like a lot." Sam wrapped an arm around my shoulder, pulling me closer to him.

"Wow, we're such idiots. We liked each other this whole time, but we were too stubborn to admit it." I giggled out.

"And we only admitted it to each other because Sarah and Bucky made us. Don't know how I feel about that."

"Well, let's just be glad. Then we can go beat their asses for tricking us."

----

"Where are the boys?" Sam asked as we walked inside the house.

"They went to go play with Ms. Sherlly's grandkids. What's going on here?" Sarah asked as she motioned at me and Sam's joint hands.

"We told each other about our feelings. Y'all ain't have to trick us into going to the docks to get us to confess though." I said as I looked between Sarah and Bucky.

"Well you two obviously weren't going to get to it yourselves. So we took matters into our own hands." Bucky said as he sipped on a beer.

"We're gonna get y'all back for this. Just wait." Sam said.

"I'm shaking in my boots." Sarah said as she patted Sam on the shoulder.

"Y'all gonna start treating me with some respect. I'm Captain America now." We all looked at Sam for a second before we busted out laughing.

[godsofhumanity]

GODHUNTER by AMY SUMIDA | REVIEW

okiee this was recommended to me by @inkleaves ^-^ uhmm so i have a LOT to say about this book. spoilers under cut.

OVERVIEW: “Godhunter” is the epithet given to a young woman named Vervain who uses witchcraft and magic to go around committing deicide in order to save humanity from gods who drain their energy to gain immortality and other godly attributes. However, when Vervain is recruited by the Norse god Thor, she finds herself in an alliance with the people she originally considered her enemies, as they work together to save the world from the maliciousness of the Aztec god, Huitzilopochtli.

RATING: 2/10. i’m giving it a low rating because it doesn’t really have too much to do with mythology, but i did like its general portrayal of most deities even though this book was insanely cringey and dumb.. now, even though under the cut, i’ve kinda bashed the book quite a bit, i still have to admit that i’d be lying if i said i didn’t have fun reading it. i stayed up to 1 AM trying to finish it because i had to find out what the protag’s next stupid decision would be,, all in all, if you like trash/cringe fiction- this is for you.

WARNING: even though this book is a YA novel, I’d say there’s a definite emphasis on the adult part of “young adult”... Certain scenes and themes are inappropriate for minors.

AVAILABLE ON: pdf link here ^-^ ((i think it downloads immediately if you click))

THINGS I LIKED:

the book is cringe.

great diversity in terms of the god cast. i learned about some new deities that i was previously unfamiliar with, so that was cool

Brahma (Hindu deity) wears a Gucci belt as part of his attire ^-^

whatever Estsanatlehi and Tsohanoai (Native American deities) had going on.... they were really cute and wholesome

THOR-HORUS BROTP AGENDA!!!!!!!! everyone who follows me already knows how keen i am about this idea of all the war deities hanging out together (fite club), and this novel served up exactly that. disappointing that Huitzilopochtli wasn’t a part of it, but i am settling for Thor and Horus’ several centuries old friendship.

Horus’ falcon tattoo detail.. i LOVE the idea of the gods having their sacred animals tattooed,, it’s so awesome!!!

Pan... i liked the way he still had his little horns, and he was kinda chaotic and fun.

in general, the descriptions of the gods were so pleasant and so cool.. i really liked the way that pretty much all the gods were beautiful,, this is very much in line with my own idea of how the gods look, and i think it makes sense, because they’re meant to be charismatic, compelling beings- beings that you worship, beings that you praise- why would they be anything but beautiful? and even if they were considered ugly by other gods, that’s only in comparison to other deities.. from a human perspective,, i just can’t see how any mortal could consider a god to be anything less than perfection,, idk

in particular- i really enjoyed the descriptions of Huitzilopochtli in his debut. i know he’s a piece of shit in the novel, but i LOVED the way he was described with his war-frenzy being triggered by blood, and the way, as god of the sun, his body almost glows, and heats up as though you’re looking into the sun itself, and the only way he can cool it down is by bathing in blood... WOWOWOWOW it’s just such a neat and fantastic visual description. his physical appearance really paid tribute to Huitzilopochtli’s original domain and attributes.

i also liked the linking between Huitzilopochtli being the Father of Vampires.. links between Aztec culture and vampirism is a trope that i didn’t originally suspect, but have become exposed to quite a bit as of late,, and i think that it’s quite a clever little plot. i liked that Huitzilopochtli also debunks superstitions about the sun, garlic, crosses, holy water etc.

Huitzilopochtli as the villain. the man makes a BRILLIANT villain- his motives are very clear and also, i thought, justified, albeit unoriginal. his presence is quite terrifying, and the reader does worry for Vervain’s safety whenever she’s with him- which is good! this means that he fills out his role as a villain well. tbh,, i did love Huitzilopochtli from the moment of his debut, but he got knocked out of my books during a certain temple scene and i have some thoughts about that in the next section.

when Vervain wakes up after the temple dream with Huitzilo, and she relaxes because it was just a dream, but then she looks into the mirror and sees bite marks on her neck!!! CHILLS! now THAT was good writing- it was unexpected, and served well to navigate into the next part of the plot.

Odin and Huitzilopochtli holding a ted talk on “how to create panic and discord among the humans”, and the gods having to bring certain meals depending on what the first letter of their names were.

Vervain’s pop-culture references, and her weaponry- especially the gloves that have blades in them that get released when she swings her hand downwards. very cool, i want them.

casual appearances from Vladimir Putin (yes, i said Vladimir Putin)... i couldn’t stop laughing when i read that Huitzilo was trying to kill Putin’s daughter to instigate a war...... asdhshajdhasdjfhjdhf insane

also i know Vervain was trying to mock Huitzilo when she nicknamed him “Blue”,, but like.. that’s a really cute name and it wasn’t even insulting.. yeah, that one backfired on you Vervain... if anything, that just made it seem like she actually had affections for him and i feel like probably in part is the reason why he felt encouraged to pursue her.

THINGS I DIDN’T LIKE/THINGS THAT DIDN’T MAKE SENSE AND/OR CONFUSED ME:

the book is cringe.

it reads like a 15 year old’s fantasy AU where she’s a humble young woman, unextraordinary- yet somehow, she is the muse of every man’s desire. handsome, ripped gods who never wear clothes are laying themselves down at her feet,, and she is just overwhelmed by the choices before her; and all the while, she has to balance a complicated love life with her duty to save the world (since she’s the only one who can).

Vervain as a protagonist. idk how old she’s meant to be, but since the book is in first-person, and the reader is exposed to her innermost thoughts,, i’ve gotta say- she’s incredibly immature. as a protagonist, i just feel like she’s rude, pretentious, snobby.. she has no idea what “respect” even means. in every scene, she’s either fighting someone, or lusting after them (when Teharon told her off for having lascivious thoughts about him, and she simply responded with “well stop being so sexy then” i wanted to die.... WHAT is wrong with her)

i hate the way she looks down on the gods- even if you didn’t worship them, or even believed in their existence, surely you wouldn’t have the gall to lecture Hades and Persephone on how to be a good couple (especially when your advice is shit). surely you wouldn’t have the gall to say to Thor what Vervain says to him on pg 227, 4th line from the bottom, that i will not repeat here. Vervain is just too self-absorbed. i don’t hate her, but i definitely think her character is a bit,,, iffy.

relating to Vervain as the protagonist- everything just seems to happen to her.. and i know that she’s the protag, and things are meant to happen to her, but it all happens to her one after the other in succession, no breaks. it’s so easy for her... oh? Huitzilopochtli is going to kill Putin’s daughter? no worries, Vervain can read Huitzilopochtli’s thoughts! oh? the gods have never been able to transform more than half their body into their animal form? no worries, Vervain is so powerful she can force a god to change against their will! oh? Vervain is being attacked by blood-thirsty wolves? no worries, she saved the life of one werewolf and now he’s indebted to her and will literally kill himself in order to protect her! everything is easy, and nothing is a problem.

the way every male deity ever sees Vervain once and immediately wants to take her to bed. why was that a necessary aspect of her character? and also, why are the gods portrayed as such lustful beings?? it really wasn’t necessary.

Horus throwing a fit about how December 25 is his birthday and that it was stolen from him by Jesus... to quote:

“No big deal?” Horus puffed up. “I was called the Lamb of God. I had twelve apostles, and my myths spoke of my crucifixion and consequent resurrection in three days. His stories were my stories first!”

it’s fine that Horus is angry about his birthday which was i think, historically celebrated around this date- but the rest of it isn’t even true???? Horus didn’t have 12 apostles, i’m pretty sure he was also not called “Lamb of God”, and he wasn’t crucified!!! aghhhh even Thor says “It’s been so long that even you don’t remember things accurately.”

anyways.. my beef with this is the way it’s phrased so as to imply that “oh christianity just stole everything from the pagans” when this is so incredibly false and sounds like something an ill-informed person would say. you can read more about christianity, paganism and christmas here

kinda related to the previous point- the jokes about Jesus’ skin colour. i quote:

“... when Christ first became a god, he looked Jewish because those were the people he chose to align himself with. However, the Jews didn’t want him, and when Christianity spread, the white people wanted Jesus to look more like them. With the change in belief, Christ’s appearance changed. ... We used to tease him about how he looked whiter every time we saw him... Kind of like Michael Jackson...”

what the FUCK??????? seems like Sumida doesn’t understand that various ethnic groups illustrate Jesus as appearing as the local people do. Yes, obviously in a Western country, Jesus is going to look European, he’s going to look white. If you go to Japan, you will see Jesus and the rest of the gang looking pretty fucking Japanese. the point of this is NOT to erase Jesus’ Jewish ethnicity, and it is certainly not because of something like “the Jews didn’t want him”- it is because it is a way for followers to better relate to the Divine. including Christ in this story isn’t the problem- i’ve seen others do it very well. the problem is how uneducated her writing comes across.

all the gods have human jobs so that they can earn money and stuff,, which is fine- Thor, for example, owns a line of boats, which makes sense. but Pan? his job is making p*rn. now even though it’s true that everyone associates Pan with sexuality and stuff,,, this isn’t his primary role, and making Pan out to be just a playboy who has his mind in the gutter 24/7 i think is a bit of a mockery. Pan is, first and foremost, a god of the Wild. why Sumida elected to make him a p*rn manufacturer and not a wildlife conservationist is beyond me... i’m not even pagan, and i thought this creative decision was distasteful and stupid, especially because his character is actually quite light-hearted and cool.

the temple scene with Huitzilopochtli and Vervain. as i said previously, i really really liked Huitzilo’s character. he made an excellent villain. but this part?? i understand why it was done, but i HATED that it had to happen... not just because it was horrible for Vervain, but Huitzilo seemed so powerful and godly right up to that point- after which he seemed pretty pathetic- going back after Vervain after she’s rejected him countless times. she is JUST a mortal!!! c’mon Huitzilo, give it up!!! you are degrading yourself at the expense of achieving one mortal’s “love”.. the fact that he had to hypnotise her to get what he wanted AND had to achieve it through her dreams (when’s she can’t protect herself) was sooooo pathetic and disgraceful.. IMO, he committed the worst sin any person could ever commit and i just... AGHHHHHHHHH SMH WHY?!

speaking of morons- Thor. Thor just comes across to me as extremely possessive, and over-protective,, and idk how Vervain was NOT creeped out by the fact that Thor had literally been stalking her for two years before she even met him. wtf? god or not- that’s creepy. actually, i think it’s creepier because he is a god. 

Sif. i am still waiting for good media representation of thunder god Thor and his beautiful golden-haired wife Sif- i want them to be HAPPY, and i want them to be in love the way they should be! 

Persephone. i like the idea of Persephone being sweet-tempered, and kind- but in this book, she’s such a wimp??????? she totally just lets Vervain be rude to her, a goddess who’s name means “Bringer of Destruction”. also- her relationship with Hades seems toxic.. i mean,, he like tracks her? she starts stuttering when she talks to him, and gets nervous when people so much as mention his name. not to mention the fact that Persephone says that when she does go back to him, all he demands from her is a certain horizontal dance so much so that she is “sore” (<- quoting from the book here) every time she returns??????? WHAT IS HAPPENING?????????? and no one even questions it. Vervain doesn’t even question it! instead she suggests that Persephone MOVES IN with Hades permanently???? and that Hades should just start verbally saying how much he loves Persephone instead of “showing” her how much he “loves” her.....??? there are SO many issues with this.. i can’t even- *screams*

the Aphrodite-is-madly-in-love-with-Huitzilopochtli side plot. it could have been really good, but then it ends so abruptly,,, i mean.. why’d Aphrodite get done so dirty like that? Also summary of Hephaestus’ first and final scenes:

Hephaestus, entering the room: Right, what’s all this then? Vervain: Your wife is cheating on you (again) Hephaestus: Aight, i’m out *leaves and never comes back for the rest of the book*

what the HECK was the ending with Trevor?? i hate Vervain so much i can’t... okay first of all- WHY did Trevor decide to have a wolf-marriage with Vervain?? he kept on going on about how she’s so beautiful, and kind, and caring... NO SHE ISN’T TREVOR!!! i’m so mad that he would pledge himself for all eternity to this girl who doesn’t even like him in that way!!! you played yourself son

also- Thor accepts the fact that Trevor is going to have to be close by to Vervain because the terms of the marriage state that Trevor will literally die without her touch, which is VERY GENEROUS of Thor... but Vervain?? ooooh i HATE her.. she has the audacity to look at Trevor with her lecherous eyes thinking about lustful things IN THOR’S OWN BED!!!!! and then she thinks to herself “oh whoops i shouldn’t be thinking that”- yeah you’re darn right you shouldn’t be thinking that!!!! whatttt is wrong with her............. 

also- where tf did Huitzilo go??? he just gave up on trying to instigate a war and vanished?? the plot was so unresolved?????? AGH!

[adobe-outdesign]

I choose to believe that Henry made the Mediocre Melodies, along with all the other robots in FFPS, with the exclusion of Trash and the Gang. Michael made those with spare duct tape and some hot glue he found lying around in an attempt to prove himself to Henry. Henry was genuinely touched and decided to keep them because it's the first gift hes gotten from someone in like fourty years. If you insult Trash and the Gang, he will materialize in front of you for insulting his son's creations.

Henry, nodding towards the stage: what is that

Michael: I can’t afford animatronics yet so I glued foam fingers onto a milk create. do you think that’s okay for now?

Henry, crying a little out of joy: yeah it’s perfectly fine

[the--blackdahlia]

Dr. Feelgood Companion Piece

So, the amazing @smokeandmirrorz inspired me to write this, and convinced me to post it. It kinda goes along with their’s, but not exactly. Also, it’s got Steven x Duff because I’m trash.

Setting: Dr. Feelgood’s Asylum for the Criminally Insane

Summary: The Rose gang was doomed the minute Axl got caught. They scattered, Slash and Izzy going one way, Duff and Steven going another. Until Duff is caught.

Nikki had just left Dr. Stanley’s office when he heard the hushed rumors from some of the more coherent people. A new resident of the asylum. Nikki smirked to himself as he found a seat next to Vince, who was trying to sunbathe through a dirty window.

“You hear?” Nikki asked, nudging the blond.

“I hear a lot of things. You have to be more specific,” Vince didn’t even have his eyes open as he relaxed.

“We got a newcomer,” Nikki said. “Wanna take bets on what got them jailed up like us?” Vince opened one eye.

“What are we betting?” Vince asked.

“You can have my dessert for a week if you get the closest,” Nikki told him. “And you know with Mick cooking, it’s good.” Vince sat there for a moment, contemplating, before he nodded in agreement. “Okay, what’s your guess?”

“Why do I have to go first?” Vince asked. He sighed and looked out over the yard, where he could see Tommy bouncing around. “Well, I don’t hear any laughter, so it’s not another Tommy. Maybe he murdered his whole family?”

“Ouch,” Nikki laughed. “Okay, I guess he’s a war vet like Mickey. Too many explosions too close to the ear?”

“Can’t wait to meet him,” Vince laughed. “I heard Mick is making chocolate cake next week.”

****

Michael McKagan sat in his room, a look of pure anger on his face. He hated people calling him Michael, his name was Duff. He hated people poking and prodding him like he was a fucking cow. And, worse off, he hated that they took him away from Steven. When the police showed up to get him, he told Steven to run, thankful that he had. And they kept asking him where he was. Duff wasn’t going to tell them.

“Michael,” The doctor in the corner spoke up.

“My name. Is Duff,” He growled. The doctor sighed.

“Right, right. Duff, do you know why you’re here?” Dr. Frehley asked.

“Because this country hates scum like me,” Duff gave him a small smirk.

“You were hanging out with the wrong crowd and you got caught,” Dr. Frehley told him. “With some rehabilitation, we can get you back to being a fine, upstanding citizen…”

“I don’t need rehabilitation!” Duff snapped, jumping up. The only other person Dr. Frehley had seen with such a short fuse was Vince Wharton.

“Duff, you were hanging out with a gang of bank robbers. You almost killed three police officers. The only reason you aren’t in a jail cell right now is…”

“I know, I know,” Duff crossed his arms over his chest.

“Now, are you going to tell us where the other members of the gang are? Saul Hudson? Jeffrey Isbell? Michael Coletti?” He noticed the way Duff’s hands balled into a fist at the mention of the last name.

“He doesn’t go by that name,” Duff hissed. “That name was given to him by an evil man. Don’t you ever call him that name ever again.”

“You know that William Rose is already here. And it’s believed that we have Mr. Hudson and Mr. Isbell on the way. We’re just waiting on Mr. Coletti…”

“Don’t call him that!” Duff screamed. Before he could launch himself at the doctor, one of his aids was through the door, holding Duff down. “Get off me!”

“You need to calm down Mr. McKagan,” Dr. Frehley told him. “This will help you.” Duff felt the prick of a needle in his arm and his body started to relax. “When you wake up, maybe you’ll be more willing to talk.” The aid rolled Duff onto his side, so he was looking at the brick wall.

****

Tommy’s laugh could be heard across the common room as Mick, Vince, and Nikki were allowed in the next day. He was sitting by a redhead who was staring up at the ceiling. The three made their way over.

“Fuck, it’s Rose,” Vince grumbled as he saw who Tommy was hanging out with. “I hate him.”

“You hate everyone who looks better than you,” Nikki smirked. Vince swung to hit him, but he had already expected that and moved. 

“Did you hear we have a new guy?” Tommy asked. “Axl said he might know him.”

“Did he now?” Nikki asked, siding up to the redhead. “Wanna help me win a bet?” Axl was about to open his mouth when a new face, dressed in the patient garb, made his way into the common room with two aids at his side. “That him?”

“Duff?” Axl asked. He jumped up and made his way towards the blond. “Duff!”

“Axl!” Duff pulled away from the aids. They watched from the sidelines as the two met.

“They got you?” Axl asked. “Where are the others?”

“I don’t know,” Duff admitted. “Izzy and Slash left. Steven was sick so we hid and the cops came and I told him to run…”

“Shit,” Axl sighed. “This is not how I had this planned Duff.”

“I know,” Duff nodded. “The doctor who’s been interrogating me, he said they’ve got Izzy and Slash…”

“I haven’t seen them yet, but we’ll keep our eyes open,” Axl motioned for Duff to follow him. “This is Mick, Tommy, Nikki...and Vince.” Axl rolled his eyes slightly. “This is Duff. One of my gang.”

“You weren’t lying about robbing that bank then?” Vince asked. Axl shook his head. “Damn.”

“Let’s hope they’re wrong,” Axl told Duff. “This place ain’t someplace for them.”

****

A few days later, Jeffrey Isbell, AKA Izzy Stradlin, was brought in. He had a shit eating grin when they led him out of the ambulance and into the asylum. And a few days after that, Saul Hudson, AKA Slash, joined them with a mass amount of curly hair shielding him from the rest of the world. Nikki, Vince, Tommy, Mick, Axl, and Duff greeted them.

“Izzy here is a master lock picker,” Axl explained. “Duff’s the muscle. Slash is great at a knife and well, other weapons.”

“No wonder you ended up in here,” Nikki nodded.

“What about Steven?” Mick asked. “You don’t talk about him much.”

“Steven was usually the face we sent in to get the money,” Duff explained. “And he was really good as explosives.”

“Oh, I like that,” Tommy laughed.

“That must make you the mastermind,” Vince looked at Axl. “My apologies to your gang.” Slash chuckled, causing the redhead to glare at him.

“I can’t wait to get out of here,” Axl sighed. “I hate you guys.”

****

It had been several weeks since Duff had been brought in, and every day, they asked him and the others for Steven’s location. And every time, Duff would laugh right in their faces.

That was until the night that an unconscious man was brought into the asylum. Mick saw it through the window as they brought him in on a stretcher. He could hear their whispered voices as they deposited him in a room, talking about how Dr. Criss or Dr. Carr would be by the next morning to assess him.

“Got a name?” One aid asked.

“Uh, Michael Coletti,” the other one responded as they got the file ready. “Alias, Steven Adler.”

“I see,” The first one replied. Mick stared at the door. He couldn’t wait to see Duff in the morning.

****

Duff shuffled along for breakfast. He had kept his temper in check, so the meds weren’t a requirement. He looked up at Mick, who was making the eggs.

“Anything new?” Duff asked. Mick gave him a smirk and leaned over to give him his eggs.

“Someone new was brought in last night,” Mick told him. “Completely in the dark. He was unconscious too.”

“Why does this matter to me?” Duff asked.

“They said his name was Steven Adler.”

Duff nearly dropped his plate when he heard the name. He ran out of the line, out of the cafeteria, with the aids following him. He rushed down one hall, trying to find what empty room they would’ve put him in.

“Steven!” Duff yelled. “Steven!” The few patients that had to eat in their rooms looked out the small windows in their doors, including Vince, who had gotten into a fight with a man named Sebastian the day before.

“Duff!” Vince called out. “Three doors down on the left.”

“Thanks Vince!” Duff rushed down the hall to Steven’s room. Looking in the window, he saw him on the bed, asleep, with Dr. Carr standing over him. “Steven!” Dr. Carr turned to look at Duff as the aids grabbed him. “Let me go! Steven!”

Duff was dragged back to his room, two away from Steven’s, where he was sedated and thrown on the bed.

****

Later that afternoon, Duff was released and he immediately went to Steven’s room. But looking through the window, he didn’t see him anywhere. The aids urged him along, sending him outside for some air with everyone else. The whole time, Duff kept his eyes peeled. He spied the group he hung out with standing together, talking to someone. Slash looked over and smiled, motioning him over.

“Duff, look who’s here,” Slash told him. Tommy was laughing and joking around with whoever it was, and as Duff got closer, he felt his heart stop. There was a black eye and split lip, but he knew who it was.

“Steven,” Duff breathed. The other blond smiled at him.

“Hey Duff,” Steven replied. Before anyone could do anything, Duff was pushing his way past them and wrapping his arms around Steven. He kissed him deeply before burying his face in his hair.

“Oh, that’s...okay.” Vince laughed a bit. Axl wanted to hit him, but he didn’t want to take a nap yet.

“You’re okay,” Duff whispered, holding onto Steven.

“I’m okay,” Steven nodded. Duff pulled back to look at the black eye. “Went down with a fight. You would’ve been proud of me.”

“Always am,” Duff smiled. He looked over at Axl. “So, got a plan?”

“A plan?”

“We got our explosions expert. And Mick works in the kitchen, and I know that Tommy is in the infirmary enough that he has the nurses wrapped around his finger,” Duff explained. “I think that we could bust out of here.”

[piccolina-mina]

The dynamics on this show are interesting, but I love how there are groupings because so many of them have such similarities. Objectively speaking, even characters you find unfavorable or unlikable are often in some way similar to characters you like. Like you have:

The Runners - Liz, Alex, and Rosa

Liz didn't used to be a runner which makes her so interesting. She said something broke in her after Rosa died and she was restless ever since. Running was something she resented in her mother and Rosa, but then she ended up doing the same thing. She and Alex, they're good at running towards things they can make sense of, concrete things, purpose: running towards science and achievement, war and battle, danger, but they run away from feelings.

Those are terrifying and harder to make sense of. Feelings and connections. In all of their relationships (friendships and romantic: Diego, Arturo, Maria, Michael), they always have one foot out of the door. It's not that they don't love someone or care, they show all of that in their own ways but it takes work for them to not bolt. They're fighting against their nature. It's survival and self- preservation. Rosa runs to escape too. Ironically, while the other two run for themselves, Rosa does too but also runs for everyone else. She thinks it's better to put a divide between her and the world.

The Internalizers - Kyle, Alex, and Max

This group, fks me up on a personal level because of this, but many of the characters have a bit of this quality, but these three really embody this to the hilt. But they all showcase it differently.

Kyle functions the best. He functions so well people don't even realise or consider he has problems. He's good at giving the illusion that he's sharing more than he really does, and he's great at coaxing other people to be more open, but he doesn't always practice what he preaches. He holds onto the past a lot in part because he doesn't want to repeat it. But that boy has internal battles, and no one really notices. The two people who do are Liz and Alex, but both are runners, and one is a heavy internalizer too.

Alex is one of those internalizers who feels everything but doesn't emote and show it. So he comes across like he's unfazed, but he keeps everything in. It's possible it's an effect of his abusive childhood. It's a conscience effort for him to express most feelings and he distributes them carefully and usually with specific intentions.

Max is the most emotionally open but he's the sort who internalizes blame like no other. It's actually funny that so many fans hate him because he would just take that totally accept it. He'll take blame for things whether it was his fault or not. Guilt eats away at him. He's the poster child for depression out of the three aliens. Hides his pain, sadness, most of his feelings that affect him and him alone, he buries.

The Caretakers - Maria and Kyle

They take care of people. Often at their own expense. There's a reason why Liz feels safe with Kyle, why Alex despite their history is less guarded with Kyle. There's a reason why Liz can confide in Maria. Why Michael responds to Maria, Why Max is at ease around Maria. Kyle and Maria are natural nurturers without even trying to be. They probably have the warmest vibes around them.

They make people gravitate to them with their personality and energy. They're the reason there are quotes about protecting your space, because they have a draw that the wrong people will siphon from at it can be at their own expense.

They take care of people, but they don't have people taking care of them often. They present themselves as if they don't need it. Kyle allows himself to be "a distraction" but also hints at wishing his needs were met too. Maria takes care of her mom without complaint but also doggedly pursues anything that can make her mom better because she misses her mom but she's also tired.

They're the emotional support characters everyone leans on. They tend to needs: physical, emotional, sxual, and mental.

*caveat. Max can also fall into this too. Some of his caretaking is out of guilt (Arturo) but he shows this most with his siblings. Later on with Liz. His entire life is the three of them. But it's limited. We saw that with how neglectful he was with Cam, how it doesn't extend to his mother etc.

The Fixers - Michael and Liz

This is probably why the Science Bros is so appealing even though Michael often treats Liz like trash. They're both highly intelligent, STEM geared, and born and bred fixers. If you have a problem, they can pull off some of the emotional labor (we see that with Liz and Maria when she's made aware and Liz and Isobel and Michael and Isobel and Michael and Maria), but they're fixers first and foremost.

That's why they work so well together and probably will be at the forefront of getting Max back if Michael can keep it together. Michael is the most literal fixer. A handy man and mechanic, the go to for any fix. He's not calculated though. He's impulsive and wants immediacy. He jumps into the first solution he wants it fixed now.

Liz wants it fixed right. She weighs the options and has to figure out the best solution. So they're so similar in that regard but still clash. But that's how they both end up dragged to a healer in the desert. Do they believe it? No. But a fix is a fix.

The Moral Compasses/Arbiters - Kyle, Liz, Cam

Kyle and Liz are definitely the moral compasses of the gang. They're balanced and fair. They run on both logic and emotion effectively. When one threatens to supersede the other, they catch it and correct it. They're driven by what's right. They're moral and conscientious. You can trust that they're always pointed at due north. They have codes they live by. Affirmations.

Cam is like this too. It's interesting how she was set up to be an antagonist, but what's right was prioritized over personal gain. She didn't compromise her ethics even for her sister. She lost her job doing what was right at her own expense.

The Masked Posers - Isobel and Alex

Posers isn't meant negatively, but I couldn't think of a better way to word it. Just FYI.

These two spend so much time hiding behind a carefully crafted facade and mask that sometimes they lose sight of themselves. They both ended the season having to meet themselves in the mirror. Alex is tapping back into who he was (that leather jacket 😍) and Isobel has to figure out who she is outside of Noah and Max.

They're shackled by image and projecting specific ones. But their masks crack and you see bits of what's behind them. They have the most prominent and consistent identity issues.

The Survivors/Outlaws/Rebels - Michael, Maria, Rosa

They're all survivors in their own way, but these three have a very distinctive style. Virtual outcasts of the town. Who they were was decided by outsiders whether they fit the profile or not.

They do what they have to do to survive, and they don't compromise or make apologies for it. They are who they are and they own it.

They're the ones who are inclined to break the rules or laws. Michael and Maria are both hustlers who do what they need to in order to make ends meet. Rosa self-medicated to survive. Michael is the known troublemaker and rabble rouser, Rosa is the town pariah and stain, Maria is the weirdo.

The Protectors - Michael, Max

The brothers probably clash so much because they'll both do whatever it takes to protect their people, but they don't always agree on how to do that. They will fight for you if they care.

Max can extend this farther and does since he's a cop. Michael protects the people he cares about and doesn't give a damn about anyone else. That circle is very small. So far, he protects Isobel, Max, Alex, and Maria. That's it.

The Riders - Michael, Maria, Cam

They are ride or die for their people. No questions asked. Even if you're fking up. They'll bitch but have your back. They will ride shotgun to your crazy every time.

Michael visibly didn't agree with things Isobel did or suggested and verbally and physically disagreed with Max a lot, but he'll still ride with you until the wheels fall off.

Maria endlessly supports and held a decade long grudge on Rosa's behalf. Knew a lot about Rosa and how troubled she was but was her ride or die anyway.

Cam knew Max was lying to her and put up with a lot, but she had his back the whole time.

[suffering-and-happy-about-it]

Time After Time (The Eighties Blasts Collection, Part 1.)

Description: Jim Hopper died as a hero. But with that, one certain problem rises up - who will now lead the cops of Hawkins? Hopper thought of that - he decided to write a letter, naming his niece, nineteen-year-old student of Indianapolis police academy, Y/N Hopper as a sheriff deputy in a letter. But anybody in the town doesn't have a clue that being a cop in Hawkins is way more dangerous than it might seem.

NOTICE: This is an AU where Hopper had a brother which he doesn’t talk to, but still has a great relationship with his niece (more like father-daughter relationship). Nothing else would be changed.

Pairing: Steve Harrington x Hopper!Reader (eventually) - the story is more driven by the relationships in the gang.

A/N: Every chapter will probably be named after one ICONIC 80s song because I am trash for them. Also, I will call Johnathan John bcs I am sick of writing such a long name over and over again.

Warnings: Grief, losing a loved one, bad family background for the reader, Will, Johnathan and Joyce leaving Hawkins.

Word count: 3.7 K (Sorry guys, I had fun)

Tagging: x

Master list: The Eighties Blast Collection

Try to ask your parents about living in the '80s. Or no, you don't have to ask them at all - they would definitely tell you that it was way easier, better and safer back then. Maybe they would be right if you don't remind them about Doug Clark and Carol Bundy for example. Serial killers aren't such things in our age.

But there was one particular town in Indiana where it wasn't exactly a pleasure to live during the '80s. There was like... Everything from novels and movies had happened there - strange disappearances of children, mutates crawling from another dimension, possessed shirtless white boy with a mullet running around, kidnapping people and basically killing the; even murders bated by U.S. government and experiments on people.

It was a true science-fiction to say at least. 

What was the town’s name? Hawkins. Hawkins, Indiana with a population of thirty thousand people - may be more or less, nobody exactly knew since such a crazy shit was happening out there.

Your beloved uncle Jim, to which you went every holiday for the whole two months, has lived there since forever, except for his rather short time in New York - and you found your way to love the city as well. The people there were always the same - same shopkeepers, same employees in the restaurants, same stores and groceries. You dreamt about working alongside Jim since you were just a little kid. While other girls wanted to be princesses and astronauts, you just wanted to be a cop.

So it hit you when you were in your room at the police academy, listening to George Michael and read a magazine, laying down on the bed. At your nineteen, you were one of the best cadets that ever got into the police academy before reaching the age of 21. Jim was so proud that he cried when you called him.

But when the sergeant who led your training called your name through the silent halls, you knew that something had to happen. And when you sat down behind the desk, looking her in the face, you knew it isn't anything nice. 

And when she told you, oh boy, you couldn't but chuckle unbelievably. No, you weren't happy or amused with what sergeant Brown told you - but you couldn't believe it. 

“Jim Hopper is dead? Is it... For sure? That must be a mistake. You're shitting me right now.” - You told her, not even caring about the rule not to curse around your authorities. And Mrs. Brown fully understood what you're going through at the moment, so she didn't say a word about that. Your breath stuck in your throat as you got up to walk around the room. 

“Miss Hopper, I can tell you for certain that I am not joking.” - The woman on the opposite side of the table looked you in the eyes. - “I am sorry for your loss, yet Mrs. Byers sent us an official document where Jim Hopper named you his deputy sheriff, signed and stamped two weeks ago.” - She took the document out of the envelope and looked you in the eyes, putting it in front of himself so she could read from it.

“But I’m too young to be a deputy.” - You mumbled and took the document seriously naming you to the function into your fingers, reading it word after word. Jim was looking forward to having you by his side as a cop - so when he learned about the Russians in a facility below Star Court, he wrote two letters and one document - one for Eleven, a girl who he adopted and you liked, one letter addressed to you and a document naming you the deputy, so he was sure that the Hawkins city is in good hands when he's gone. You never saw the letter though. 

Only the official document made it. 

“And we do acknowledge that. You're too young, you haven't even finished your studies, Miss Hopper, this is a rather unpleasant and special situation. And for that, we will transfer you to an academy nearby Hawkins, so you can finish your training there while you will be helping at the police department.” - Mrs. Brown smiled at you a bit. - “We also acknowledge that you loved your uncle and to continue with his legacy means everything to you. Hawkins department is out of policemen anyway.” 

---

So it was done. Your grief over Jim was deep and it took too long for you to acknowledge that he won’t come to his cabin hidden in the woods a small while from the big oak next to the road to Denfield, just fifteen minutes away from Hawkins. 

When you told the locals about the cabin, it was in a horrendous state - the windows were missing, there were holes in the ceiling, the door were broken apart and... It was a hellhole. It needed a lot of repairing and almost everything was broken inside, including almost all of the furniture, but you managed somehow. 

Especially the broken windows and broken ceiling would cost a fortune if there wasn't for the good people of Hawkins who collected money and old, non-used things from their homes. They started one month before you came so it was almost done when you were about to roll into the town - but you could do the rest by yourself.

You let Hopper's old armchair just in the place where it always was, in his trail, and you left El’s room untouched as well, you only cleaned it up. People from the town were helping you with the renovations by all kinds of small gifts, ranging from canned and normal food to shampoo, helping you paint and paper it from the inside, giving you their old equipment like the TV or a refrigerator, even a VHS player. 

On the day when you came back to Hawkins in an old Chevy from the 70s’, with all your things packed in boxes stored in your car’s trunk, you immediately went to Joyce’s house. Joyce was something like your auntie - you, Nancy Wheeler, her son Jonathan and Steve Herrington always played by the woods she had behind their house. She always made you the best cupcakes, played with you, talked to you and when you were too caught up in playing, she called you to have lemonade or some snacks - but that was too long ago for you to even properly remember.

You remembered only small bits from your evenings at the Byers' house, but the feeling of Joyce is a nice, calm and sweet person always remained inside your head.

Once, all of you were only kids and you were in Hawkins only for two to three weeks every summer - so, naturally, your friendships with the old party didn't exactly last in the form it was ten years ago. All of you got into puberty and since you were studying the police academy, getting there after the senior year of your high school, you didn't really hear much about any of them. 

Plus, after you left Hawkins, you found yourself new friends in New York, so... It was no wonder, really. Everyone was just living their life the best way they could.

Although, when you heard that Joyce and her boys are you about to leave Hawkins for Maine, you tried to speed everything up only to tell her your goodbye before she actually goes away. When you got out of the car, 99 Luftballons by Nena practically screaming from Chevy's radio, you could only see a half-full moving truck and a load of kids out there. 

At least, you weren't that late, were you?

You could recall some of them - like Eleven, a girl living with Jim who you got to know the spring of 84’ when you got released for a weekend lasting holiday to celebrate Jim’s birthday. She was cool as fuck, having some kind of psionic abilities. Jim almost killed both of you when he found out that she had shown you some tricks, but you found that extremely cool. You two had built a pretty good and strong connection over the course of your visits at Hopper's.

You were able to recall Mike Wheeler and Will Byers as well since you knew their siblings - and these boys just couldn't be more similar to Jon and Nance. But there were a few kids you didn't have a single idea who they might be.

“I’m here to help. But I’m late, I guess.” - You leaned into the doorframe and smiled a bit at Joyce’s back. She was running around the whole house cluelessly and tried to pack while the others were doing the actual job. She looked at you standing there in an old flannel shirt and cool jeans which can be bought only in cities or big malls. You looked... Certainly not happy, tired, your eyes red from crying, but good and fine as hell. - “Guess you can say that I am a Hopper, right?” - You smiled as she walked to you to give you a tight, motherly hug, humming into your ear. 

“You are so big now. I remember you barely reaching my waist, darling.” - She cracked up a bit and you were almost sure that she is about to cry - and if she would, you would be a crying mess as well. You cried almost the whole way to Indiana. You just stopped yourself to cry again? Oh, boy. 

“That happens over time. Guess Jonathan isn't the smallest nor youngest now as well, huh?” - You joked, walking to one of the boxed in the hallway. Just with that, Jon accompanied by Nancy walked into the doorframe, holding another two boxes.

“Someone left a started truck outside and is playing pop blasts... Y/N?” - Jonathan asked unbelievably when you turned around to face him. He looked tired as hell just by the looks, but he still sorta got his rebellious expression, just as you were used to. And Nancy? She was breathtaking now. You almost jumped at both of them to hug them firmly with a giggle. 

The old party was getting back together. 

“I can't believe you're here!” - Nancy laughed to your ear. Both of them had the best childhood memories from the times you were there - like jamming to literally every ABBA or the Rolling Stones song, riding bikes through the neighborhood and just the best fourth of July festivals. - “Also, I'm so sorry about...” 

“I know, I know. It would be nice if you stop reminding me.” - You answered a bit louder than you plan to, so Nancy just shuts up. You were immediately apologizing, but she shook her head with her typical Wheeler smile. She totally got what you’re feeling at the moment, it wasn't even your fault really.

“Wow. I haven’t seen you since... Forever.” - Jonathan took your shoulder to his palm and smiled at you. - “I wish we could just sit down, have a cup of tea and talk about what is going on now.” - Nance agreed with him, leaving you in the hall with panicking Joyce; until another person came by.

“Is that... Is that you?” - A fourteen-year-old girl came there in an old shirt which you knew that belonged to Jim. You immediately softened when you saw the teenager, kneeling down and opening your arms for her. You closed your eyes as El leaned to you and hugged you tightly. 

“Yeah. I know.” - You mumbled into the crook of her neck quietly, letting her put her head on your shoulder as both your palms smoothed her back and her ponytail. She was such a baby girl since the day uncle Jim introduced the two of you. - “Listen up, baby. Let's get moving with the packing. You can introduce me to your friends and your boyfriend, sounds good?” - You got up, drying off her tears as you tried not to cry as well. You needed to make you both occupied.

“I would appreciate if you'd help the boys with Will’s room.” - Joyce looked at the both of you with her hands on her hips. - “Not that I don’t believe them, but I am afraid that Will’s and the other children’s packaging skills aren't exactly on point, if you know what I mean.” 

99 Luftballons subtly changed to Take On Me by A-Ha as it continued to blast through the quiet neighborhood. You and Eleven walked to Will’s room just as Joyce asked you to, leaving Nancy and Jonathan as they were.

And oh boy, there was a kind of war between four boys and a redhead girl going on, tees of every color were flying everywhere as they laughed and ran throughout the back of that house. It made you smile, wishing you could just join along. They were so young and careless and you loved it.

But as soon as they noticed you, an adult standing in the doorframe alongside El, they hid the tees and pants behind their backs and only whispers and giggling could be heard. 

“Joyce was right.” - You stepped in, picking up the clothes from the ground while looking at Will. His haircut wasn't the best and he looking alike Jon when he was a small boy. - “You guys can't pack clothes for shit.” - You mumbled as you watched every one of them.

The redhead watched you without a clue who you could be, but the others knew your face. Not too well, but they had definitely seen you around a few times before. 

“This is Y/N, Hop’s niece.” - El pointed at you and the redhead nodded. Any of the teenagers couldn't understand how could you be related to Hopper in any way - he was the old douche, probably ugly, fat and a really unpleasant person most of the time. But you were young, pretty and seemed to be a really chill person. 

“These are my friends.” - She pointed at the redhead and a boy alongside her. - ”Max and Lucas.” - She pointed at Will and Mike who you knew. - “Mike and Will.” - And then she pointed at a boy with curly hair who was smiling at you and to be honest, scaring you like shit. - “And this is Dustin.” 

“So, who’s the lucky one?” - You smirked at El and the way Mike’s cheeks reddened, you knew that he’s the one. She smiled at you without giving you a proper answer. 

You somehow managed to make the kids pack the things before dismantling the furniture in Will’s room with Jonathan’s help. You two were left alone as the others started to move all the boxes into the truck, having quite the space to talk. 

“So you and Nancy, eh?” - You smiled at him wickedly when you started to dismantle the bed. - “Or was I dreaming?” 

“Yeah. You haven't been in the town for a while. A lot of things have changed.” - Johnathan chuckled in response and handled you the wrench you needed. You rose your eyebrows. 

“You could at least call me. Would that be such a problem, mister Byers?” - You teased back and finally took the head of the bed out. 

“We thought you’re too busy living your best city life and forgot about the villagers. Hopper was updating us about your wellbeing pretty well. Heard you got to ILEA? He was proud as hell.” - Jonathan smiled. 

Yeah. Uncle Jim was the most supportive person on the whole planet when it came to you or El. You were both his little baby girls - and if someone tried to fuck your dreams up, he would be a literal pain in their ass. So, naturally, he spread the news about you studying on ILEA to everyone he actually listened to him. Joyce and Karen Wheeler were throwing with pride, lemme tell you. 

“Yeah. I got to Indianapolis, but they transferred me to the midwest since I have my new job here.” - You sighed and helped him with the wood from the side of the bed. - “Gonna study in a program of correspondence course while having my practicum here. Hawkins is apparently in need of fresh cops.”

“No way you're going to be the sheriff. That would make Hop so proud.” - Jonathan smiled at you softly and you smiled back at him. 

“He actually planned on me being the deputy. You really don't have many cops here, eh? Taking in a person who had barely finished their studies? Joke's on you.” - You started to dismantle the wooden legs off the sides. You and Jonathan were actually a good team when it came to manual work.

“We do have cops. But Hopper was the only one who wasn't bribed and actually done his damn job.” - Jon looked at you for a small while. You will be a good cop. He could feel it.

“It will be quite a change from Indianapolis.” - You sighed with a shy smile.

“I was wondering what you’re doing in the evening?” - Jonathan asked all of a sudden, his question followed by your furrowed face. - “We’ll be gone, but I don't want Nancy to be alone. If you want to... Accompany her, I will be glad.” 

“Oh, sure. If she would like to, no problem. We can borrow some VHS tapes to watch movies in the evening or whatever. Mrs. Wheeler gave me their old player.” - You nodded. There was one question which was making you furrow, so you leaned over to Jonathan, making him stop the work, quietly touching his shoulder. 

“I need to ask you something. It’s pretty... Personal to me.” - You exhaled loudly and your body shook completely on its own. 

You were all emotional about Jim passing away and even if it was more than a month since you got the news, you still fought the urge to cry. You tried to shake it off as Jonathan caught your palm in his as well. - “How did uncle Jim die? Nobody wants to tell me, they only told me that he had passed away. Was he shot? Or...” - You curled into a ball and closed your eyes. Jonathan looked around the room and gulped.

You didn't have to know this. You didn't need to know any of this. He wasn't feeling good at that moment and you could feel it. He didn't want to give you an answer, because he somehow felt that it would only hurt you even more.

“All I will tell you is that Hopper died like a real hero. That man might be a pain in everyone's ass, but he sacrificed everything to save the others. He saved all of us and I think that he saved everyone in this town. But if I would tell you, you would think that I’m crazy.” - Jon said quietly, interrupted by Joyce standing in the door. She clearly didn't hear much, since she didn't have any idea you even asked about Hopper. She was smiling, as usual, and she was really glad that the bed was dismantled.

“Oh, honey.” - She kneeled down to you and Jonathan, nuzzling you to her side, ruffling your hair, kissing the temple of your head gently. She was a true mom to everyone - even for a girl that spent only two months in Hawkins during the summer holiday. Even to a girl she hadn't seen in years.

She was something you never had, so you leaned into the touch of her small, warm palms, calming words and slow, caressing movements. Then you sat back up, smiling at her, drying your tears off.

“Can you get it to the truck?” - Joyce looked at Jonathan as he stood up. He nodded without any further thinking. 

“I need to give Y/N something. I talked to El and we agreed on it.” - She smoothed your cheek and kissed the other one tenderly. So, you followed her thought the empty house, thinking about your memories.

You could name the exact spot where Steve almost killed himself when he jumped off Jonathan’s bed onto the heating, hitting his forehead into the heater. You could exactly see their old sofa where you braided Nancy’s hair and you could say where the dinner table always stood. Hopper always sat there while he drank coffee with Joyce and her man. Lonnie was really fine... At times, before he left. He was a douchebag overall, though. 

The sweet memories made you smile again until you approached the gang consisting of children only standing there in a circle with Eleven in the middle, holding a box named ’HOPPER’ in big, dark green letters. It was almost like a cult initiation. You were sure it was one.

“I want you to have it.” - El said quietly and put the box on the ground, opening it. It was an old police uniform; the one which belonged to Hopper. It was dirty and smelled pretty bad, still having his sheriff’s badge on it. You took the shirt into your palms, caressing it between your fingers as other tears rolled down your cheeks. Then you looked at El. 

“Are you sure, baby girl?” - You asked and tried to contain your emotions as everyone was watching you with a sad face. El slowly gulped, getting on her knees as well, but then she nodded. She looked happy at that moment, contained with happy memories at Hopper.

“She wanted to keep it, but wouldn’t be for too much on use since it would only lay in the cabinet. You can wear it for work. Maybe it is too big for you and you will definitely need to wash it, but it has your name on it already, see?” - Joyce pointed at the small golden badge with Hopper on it in black letters. You leaned your head into her shoulder. A true legacy. - “I know he would want you to keep it. It will look good on you after you wash it.” 

“If you say so, Joyce.” - You smiled a bit, taking the box from El’s hands, fetching it into the trunk of your car. You stayed there until the very end, looking at the kids saying their last goodbyes. It made you cry as well, it was so sweet. 

Even Joyce hide behind the truck to have a little moment to herself. She hated when she saw her boys or their friends sad and crying. Joyce Byers was just the most amazing woman and mom you had ever met.

Even if you didn't expect it at all, you got hugs as well. The one from Will was a shy, quick one with that shy boy’s smile painted on his lips. Jonathan couldn't be as much different from his brother as he was - this boy held you firmly for a few seconds, he actually hugged you so tight you couldn't breathe for a second and screamed loudly with laughter. 

“Better watch it here or I will come back and kick your ass.” - He said jokingly, patting your shoulder. You opened your mouth and laughed too, hitting him gently as well. - “Sure. Keep on dreaming, Byers, because that's not going to happen.” - You patted his shoulder as well, bringing him in for one last quick hug - then you left him, so he could say goodbye to Nancy.

Eleven came to you after she kissed the soul out of Mike’s tall and slim body - she hugged you tightly. You maybe weren't exactly the closest, but you were something like sisters from one point of view. 

That was the magic Jim Hopper could do when he wanted to. He was bringing people together. He brought El and Mike so close he couldn't stand him anymore. But your bond would make him happy.

“If something, you can always call me.” - You looked her in the eyes as she continued crying. She was such a lovely girl. - “I know you would rather talk to Max, but I’m here too. I’ll be waiting for a call at Hop’s old number, okay?” - You asked and she nodded, unable to speak in words. But her tears were giving you an idea of what the was feeling. 

“And we repaired your old room. You will be always welcomed in that house.” - You kissed her forehead, snuggling her closer again. 

When they were leaving, you stood there with Nancy and the remaining kids, watching the cars leave, not even waving. Most of you were still crying your eyes out, so you were too dazzled to actually say goodbye. Just minutes after the cars disappeared, you looked at Nancy. 

“Need a ride home? The kids are taking the bikes apparently.” - You asked and took the keys to your car out of your pocket. Nancy nodded, smiling at you with the typical Wheeler smile. - “Also, if you want to, you can stay the night at my place. You would feel less alone and the cabin would feel less scary.” - You smiled at her when you both were sitting in the car. 

“I guess so. It would be fine to talk to you after such a long time. I miss our summer adventures.” -  Nancy said shyly and you stopped yourself from starting the car, looking her in the eyes, holding the steering wheel in your palms. 

“I do too. So, off to the supermarket and VHS store it is, I guess.” - You looked into the mirror showing you the space behind the car and started the old Chevy’s motor. 

[healthycoffeeguy]

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DEXTER is a crime drama about Dexter Morgan, a man who leads a double life as an incredibly likeable forensics expert for the Miami Police Department and as an emotionless vigilante serial killer. Taught by his foster father to harness his lust for blood and killing, Dexter lives by his own strict moral code - he only kills murderers who can't otherwise be brought to justice. Dexter is a killer who grapples with fitting into society while, at the same time, he struggles with his inability to feel emotion. The irony of Dexter's life is that he works closely as a blood splatter analyst with the very people who hunt his kind - the homicide department. Dexter's "Regular Joe" front is in full force while working alongside the ill-tempered Sgt. James Doakes, who seems to be the only one to sense Dexter's more sinister side, and Lt. Maria LaGuerta, the head of the division who pursues Dexter sexually with as much force as she would any criminal. While his sister, Debra Morgan, a tough and determined cop, leans on Dexter for personal advice and career advancement, the closest one Dexter "connects" with is Det. Angel Batista whose similar attention to detail and taste for forensics almost mirrors his own. While sentiment and feelings elude Dexter, he struggles to find a kindred spirit of sorts in his emotionally damaged girlfriend, Rita, who keeps him grounded in the realities of "normal" life and provides him respite from the dark corners of his mind. The series is based on the acclaimed novel, "Darkly Dreaming Dexter," by Jeff Lindsay.

Amazon.com

Dark and sinister is the new sexy, thanks to Dexter, which in its second season has proven to be the most successful series Showtime has offered up yet. Remember how much you squirmed in your seat during the season one finale? Believe it or not, the premiere of season two felt like it could have been a season finale--because jaws were on the floor when the credits rolled. For being a supposed sociopath, Dex is pretty broken up about the gruesome events that concluded last season. The one and only person who could possibly understand him is six feet under, and it seems our unlikely hero is losing his homicidal grip. He’s even having a little trouble slicing up a few of his latest victims (from a murderous gang member to a chainsaw-wielding fiend from his past). Enter Lila (Jaime Murray,Hustle), a lady with a sweet British accent and a few dark secrets of her own. She seems to accept Dex for who he really is, and he finds himself feeling relaxed for the first time in his life. In contrast, his relationship with his girlfriend Rita (Julie Benz) has been stretched almost to a breaking point. The problem is, he should be anything but relaxed. Someone picked a poor place to go scuba diving off the Florida coast, and came across an underwater graveyard: Dex’s primo spot for dropping dismembered bodies wrapped in heavy-duty trash bags. Word about the "Bay Harbor Butcher" gets out quick, and the F.B.I. sends the best of the best, Special Agent Frank Lundy (Keith Carradine, Deadwood) to work alongside the police to sniff out Miami’s latest serial killer. This guy is no schlub, and Dex may have met his match. And, yes, Dexter gets to work with Lundy on a daily basis, which provides some wonderfully awkward moments. It certainly doesn’t help that the intuitively paranoid Sergeant Doakes (Erik King, Oz) is hot on Dex’s trail.

Season two of Dexter is all about decisions. Lila or Rita? Old code or new code? Run or fight? Right or wrong? Well, one thing’s for sure: When it comes to writing, casting, acting, and production, the makers of this show made all the right decisions. Michael C. Hall is simply superb as the title character. You’ll never find yourself more willing to genuinely root for a serial killer. It’s bloody liberating. 

[briangroth27]

Toy Story 4 Review

I rewatched the first three Toy Story films and the shorts before seeing this, and I was blown away by how perfect this series has been so far. Making one great movie is extremely difficult, but making a full franchise that's this good seems like it should be impossible, yet here they are. So, in addition to being one of my favorite franchises since my childhood, Toy Story 4 had a massive legacy and standard to live up to. Incredibly, it completely lives up to both!

Full Spoilers...

This is very much Woody's (Tom Hanks) movie and Hanks runs with it, bringing Woody's character through a familiar struggle that leads him to a completely new place by the end without ever feeling like we’re retreading old ground. At first, Woody's attempts to force Forky (Tony Hale) to accept his role as a toy despite his insistence that he was trash (since Bonnie (Madeleine McGraw) made him out of trash) felt like a weird message to send. Then I realized it was more like what he did for Buzz (Tim Allen) in the first film, albeit with more understanding on Woody's part; even though he was similarly replaced, that’s some nice growth from the old cowboy. It doesn't matter what the toys thought they were initially—with Buzz and the BattleSaurs, we've seen toys’ fresh-out-of-the-box personalities mimicking whatever they were built as rather than realizing that they were toys—and what really makes them who they are is what they mean to a child. Because of a kid's love, they can be more than trash; more than a space ranger.

It's a nice bit of cyclical plotting that Woody goes through this again at the end of his time in another kid's room, and watching him realize that there could be more to life than going from kid to kid and endlessly being discarded was great. Toy Story introduced the terror of being left behind, TS2 played with Woody’s acceptance of the fact that Andy would eventually leave him, TS3 forced him to actually deal with Andy outgrowing him (which is entirely different from acknowledging the concept), and this movie gives us a glimpse of what happens next, when Woody has to face the entire cycle again. I really liked his admission that all he had left to give was protecting Bonnie, even though she’d moved on from him (an interesting adjustment to his outlook, given how he used to see being replaced as the worst thing that could happen). Even if he couldn’t be the toy she adored and needed, he would supply that love no matter what problems or challenges it caused in the process. Woody’s drive verged on obsession more than a few times, leading him to take really irresponsible risks and I almost think he gets off a little too easily (which would be my one note for the movie). Bo (Annie Potts) gets to be rightfully furious with Woody for not listening to her much better thought-out plans and causing real damage to her friends, but since Woody is also unable to fully let go as the leader of Andy’s toys now that they’re Bonnie’s, it would've also been nice for Dolly (Bonnie Hunt) to be right about what Bonnie needs instead of Woody ultimately knowing what’s best. Either way, I would’ve liked an apology from him to Dolly, because that section’s really the one where it feels like Woody can do no wrong, even while flouting the rules of the new room (and even if it saddles him with Forky). I wonder if Forky jumping out of the RV window was an intentional callback to Woody accidentally knocking Buzz out of Andy’s window in the first film, since that also sent him on a journey of self-discovery about his place in the world and led to a toy realizing their true purpose.

Woody's reunion with Bo (Annie Potts) was great and she was absolutely outstanding! She was so cool and I loved that it wasn't some horrible trauma that made her the awesome adventurer she’d grown into, just an unwillingness to continue sitting on her lamp watching the world go by without her. What an excellent, inspiring, and unfortunately rare motivation for a strong female character! Judging by her attitude to being given away in the flashback, she was already more well-adjusted to the possibility of being discarded than Woody and it was very cool to see that evolve into the fearless and free doll she became. I feel like we got enough nods to her history and relationships here that I don't need to see a prequel that spells out her journey (though if they gave us one I’d watch it), but I would be totally up for a sequel about her continuing adventures. Maybe it was the CGI quality of the time, but it really looked like Bo Peep’s dress was part of her ceramic sculpt in the first two movies. If it not being part of her sculpt is a retcon allowing her to be more active in cloth clothes this time around, then that doesn’t bother me at all. Her reaction to her broken arm was pretty funny! I was surprised that Woody’d spent all that time dating Bo back in Andy’s room and didn’t know that Billy, Goat, and Gruff (Emily Davis) were girls (and didn’t even know their names!); even with the excuse that they weren’t Andy’s toys, it was pretty selfish of him to not know that (and selfishness is not a new flaw for him).

Buzz’s screentime felt significantly shorter than in the other three films, but it didn’t hurt the movie for me. With this being Woody’s farewell, Buzz’s more limited focus felt right (though maybe a talk between him and Forky about their initial senses of self would’ve been worthwhile). The subplot of Buzz learning to listen to his “inner voice” (misunderstanding what Woody said about his conscience) was really enjoyable (even if this movie took some liberties in giving both Woody and Buzz more sayings in their voice boxes than it seemed like there ever were before). That was a fun callback to Buzz taking everything about himself so literally in the first movie! I would’ve liked for more of the old gang beyond Buzz to have more to do than wait in the RV, but the script and the actors made the most out of limited screentime. I liked that Bonnie promoted Jessie (Joan Cusack) to sheriff and would be interested to see how she and Dolly run things in the room without Woody (at the end, I wondered if Bonnie took Jessie to school with her, if Jessie hopped in her backpack on her own, or if Dolly agreed to send her). Letting Woody have a moment to return his badge to Jessie was a nice way to give him a chance to willingly let go of his status and his past while relenting to and restoring the way Bonnie set things up. Whether given a few funny lines or slightly larger gags, all of the other toys got a chance to shine. Buttercup (Jeff Garlin) gets an especially odd and hilarious running gag of trying to get Bonnie’s dad (Jay Hernandez) arrested to halt the family’s trip and stall for time. It was also cool to see players from the Toy Story shorts like Combat Carl (Carl Weathers) and Old Timer (Alan Oppenheimer) get moments here. It’s always nice to see shorts like those remain part of the world instead of becoming unconnected extras to be forgotten.

I liked all the new characters too! Duke Caboom (Keanu Reeves), Giggle McDimples (Ally Maki), and Ducky & Bunny (Keegan-Michael Key & Jordan Peele) were all really great additions to this world, representing a wide variety of toys with different goals, tactics, and dreams, which was refreshing: a lesser film would’ve had them pursing the same dream or wouldn’t have bothered to dig into their humorously tragic backgrounds (or imaginations) at all. Forky was funny too, as well as serving as an interesting peek into the imbuement of consciousness onto something by a kid. It was intriguing that even the other toys hadn’t seen something like that happen before (even with sentient chair Chairol Burnett (Carol Burnett) in Bonnie’s closet). His life gives credence to the idea that a toy’s purpose really is to be there for their kids while they need them, even if they don’t know it yet.

The movie’s villain, Gabby Gabby (Christina Hendricks) was quite creepy and worked really well as a dark reflection of Woody’s own insecurities about losing his kid while acting as an example of a toy that had gone off the deep end by being discarded (at first). The body horror they came up with through her wanting to take Woody’s voice box—by force, if necessary—just so she could experience the love of a child was really effective. I liked that they found a way to bring Woody to a place where he’d willingly give up his voice box (to save Forky) rather than it be stolen and that Gabby Gabby wasn’t actually that evil; she could be redeemed. I was definitely expecting a turn where Woody fought to get his voice box back and I was pleasantly surprised that it didn’t go that way. It was very cool that even after being abandoned by what she believed to be her one way out of the store and offered a chance to come with Bonnie, Gabby Gabby was still a good enough person that she chose to help another lonely and lost soul (Maliah Bargas-Good), risking abandonment again but finding a real home instead. With Woody failing to listen to just about everyone about the right way to do things, Gabby Gabby giving up the “sure thing” of Bonnie’s love to take a chance on something that felt more right was a cool way to stealthily foreshadow and parallel Woody making the same choice, just for himself rather than another kid. Gabby Gabby, even more than Woody, understood that the important thing wasn’t to be just another toy for a great kid, but to be the toy for the right kid at the right time. This is an especially cool parallel since Woody comes so close to being a contender for the villain role here too, given how obsessed he is with doing what he thinks is best for Bonnie. Gabby Gabby’s hench-dummies, the Bensons (Steve Purcell), were super-creepy! I wouldn’t have minded them taking the horror of those dummies a step further, but this worked perfectly as is. I know the Bensons have a very common ventriloquist’s dummy design, but I couldn’t help but wonder if their look was based off the book and movie version of Goosebumps’ Slappy.

At first I was skeptical that they had any full-length-worthy story left to tell in this universe and I was content for them to just continue doing periodic short films, but I was excited when I heard this would be a romantic comedy about finding Bo Peep. I’m not sure the romantic comedy vibe fully survived into the final version of the film, but taking us back to find Bo was certainly worth it and this turned out better than I could’ve imagined. The movie hit really strong emotional beats all the way through, with the flashback to Bo being given away, a very smooth recap of Woody’s life with Andy (Jack McGraw, John Morris) and Bonnie, Woody feeling left behind in Bonnie’s room, and eventually Woody nearly saying goodbye to Bo again…but changing his mind and leaving all his friends behind instead. I’m a sucker for goodbyes between family and friends, so both that one and Bo initially being given away hit me hard. Not quite as hard as Andy giving his toys to Bonnie in Toy Story 3, but they were still powerful moments. The knowledge that Woody and the gang from Bonnie’s room will probably never see each other again hurt, but I’m glad to know he’s off to find a new purpose for himself (finding homes for all the carnival toys and living his own life with Bo), rather than continuing to devote himself to someone who doesn’t need him anymore and has decidedly moved on (as I’ve seen others point out elsewhere).

The RV, carnival, and Second Chance Antiques store all provided a great variety of new locations for adventures. It was cool to see everyday settings like a store and a fair get the toy’s-eye-view treatment, transforming them into wondrous and danger-filled playgrounds. The action was great and made good use of not only the toys’ specific attributes, but tied their emotional arcs together really well too. CGI technology has improved a lot since the first film and these characters look outstanding in their latest (and last?) film. The writing and pacing were on point, while Randy Newman’s score brought a great familiar feel to the proceedings.

Toy Story 4 is an absolute delight and totally worth seeing in theaters! If they want to do another sequel and continue either Bo/Woody’s or Buzz/Bonnie’s Room stories (or both), I would definitely be down for that. I trust them to find a new story to tell with each movie and know that they’d make it fantastic, just like the rest of this franchise. However, if all we get from Toy Story is more short films, that’s OK too. And if this is the real end, then it’s a great one.

 Check out more of my reviews, opinions, and original short stories here!

[provincianx-blog]

what i learned from unlearning everything that i know

lessons from middle school, aurora, and beyond. 

at the age of fifteen, my mom forced my brother and me to leave our home in hayward, ca upon discovering that my dad had been using meth again and wasting all of his money on catfishes on the internet. 

my mom and dad had been separated for longer than my brother and I were aware of, but my mom finally had the courage to really leave him in july of 2011. she loved him her entire life, but she was done taking care of someone that wasn’t taking care of her. she was done taking care of someone who didn’t love her enough to take care of himself. she was done. 

while this seems incredibly simple, leaving hayward prompted what would turn into a 7 year identity crisis. 

as an outcast at every school i transferred to, i found a community on this website with my best friends from middle school and random strangers who loved harry potter and other fandoms as ridiculously as we did. true commitment to friendship would transcend from anonymous messages on tumblr to mutual follows on twitter. and here we are: in the age of twitter.

upon switching up different meds, after over a decade of looking for mental and emotional stability, i found out that i have bipolar-1, which still doesn’t make that much sense to me, but i’m beginning to understand it more than i did before.

i’m grateful to have been obsessed with star wars when i first saw revenge of the sith on opening night because of my tita and her husband’s work perks. i loved padme and she was my first crush but also my first example of a strong girl in mainstream film in addition to mulan (bruh i used my mulan costume for like 3 years and never gave a single HECK). i would then beg my dad to take me to blockbuster to watch the original trilogy, where i met carrie fisher/princess leia, who would radically transform how i saw the world and myself.

i grew up with my tita and tito. they took care of me when they were in college, and they’re still taking care of me now. i want to be able to take care of their kids and love them as much as they loved me growing up. i love them with all that i am and all that i can give. 

i studied politics because i wanted to make sure that my younger cousins and my baby brother would have a better world to grow up in than i did. it seems that my undiagnosed mental illness of nearly 14 years has been exacerbated by the political climate we live in today in 2018. 

i learned so much about life by learning about my own history, and i hope that everyone has this opportunity in their lifetime. it feels great, and the only one who seems to really get it is ariana grande. 

so here are 14 things i learned from being mentally ill and emo while being passionate about wanting to make the world a better and more habitable place. 

1. don’t trust the feds: a lot of 2nd amendment boys actually don’t trust the government as much as people think, and the 2A comes from settlers’ distrust in colonial Britain. the problems we see today are because the GOP has lured these same people and their kids (and their kids) into their corner by advocating for organizations like the NRA; gun control has reached the Supreme Court, but the 2nd amendment took precedent (i believe). gun control must come from the state and local governments, but political participation in these arenas are very low, especially for younger voters. i, as someone who has been involuntarily hospitalized despite voluntarily seeking medical help, am not allowed to buy a gun in the state of california for 5 years. and honestly, i really don’t care because i don’t want to need a gun anyway, but the poor and the middle class in the south feels that they need guns. 

2. stay woke: deray said this nearly everyday after michael brown was shot by darren wilson in ferguson, missouri. michael brown was my wake up call to reassess my complacency in the status quo and my participation in reinforcing anti-blackness. in the bay area, the n word was used so casually in places like union city/hayward that we became so desensitized to it. it’s still used casually, but non-black people like myself have no agency in saying it because we’re not black. it’s as simple as that. i began noticing how my family reacted to what would turn into the Black Lives Matter movement, and for the first time, i felt that i could no longer trust my relatives if they were complicit in the murders of black youth simply because they were at the wrong place at the wrong time. i couldn’t even talk to them without crying because of how upset i got from the anti-blackness i would hear. i began to isolate myself and found community on twitter. 

3. our youth is a reflection of how good things were and how good things can become if we learn to build community: in addition to the community i found on tumblr through avatar, harry potter, and the beatles, i found community with all the losers who had xbox’s instead of ps3′s. we would hang out and play search and destroy (which i still cannot succeed in after all this time smh agjhgarhdfhre) or 1v1 each other on rust. my nerd friends would let my brother and I play with them regardless of how much we sucked, and they hyped me up even when my KDR was trash. these friendships would then transcend from mw2, halo 3, and into runescape. my brother is now really good at overwatch, and the friends i made in middle school are also really good at overwatch. the difference now is that they’re making money off of it, and i’m just like, “let’s get this bread, nerds!” thank you for being there for me even though i sucked at everything i tried doing. i was reminded of this when i watched “mid90s” by Jonah Hill. our youth was such a pure period of time, but it was also the time we lost ourselves through imposing harmful social norms onto each other, such as the idea that a girl cannot be “just friends” with a boy. but - here’s the kicker - i’m queer, and i don’t really like cis-het men hahahahahahahahaha but whatever. 

4. becoming american made me forget who i am: our immigrant parents teach us that the only way is to assimilate into white America, which is essentially what happened to black and brown people following the civil rights movement. the notion of egalitarianism/equality has been nothing but harmful for all of us nonetheless, fueling debates on affirmative action and pitting black people against asian people. one of my best friends from elementary school is in prison for trying to make a living with the resources and skills made available to him. he was apprehended in thousand oaks. he is a black man, and we grew up in the same environment, but his life has been so different since we were in elementary school. the concept of equality/egalitarianism stemming from civil war gains (13th-15th amendments) has manifested into the racial inequality we see today; in other words, the idea that white americans and POC are equal has been harmful because this has never been true and continues to be untrue. my filipino friends and i would get bullied by white latinos for not speaking english in america, which is why i learned to hate myself and my culture. i love myself and my culture, and i am fighting so that i can return home to the philippines someday. 

5. our bodies are different, and that’s okay: can y’all believe that i got bullied for not having boobs in the 3rd grade? this is what happens when young girls are sexualized so early. boys participate in this, and they turn out to be shitty boyfriends later on. girls will be girls. girls just wanna be treated like human beings instead of sexual objects. i don’t think this needs to be explained further. 

6. america is a settler-colonial state turned global power, and that is problematic: this country began with the murders and deaths of indigenous people because of imperalistic pursuits. it was built on the backs of slave labor from africa. it was reinforced by colonialism through the conquering of countries such as the philippines. we’re socialized to believe that there’s no place like america and that america is such a good place to be in, but that is only true for white Americans and POC who have integrated into white American suburbs. 

7. know history, know self: - jose rizal 

8. if my life wasn’t funny, it would just be true, and that is unacceptable - carrie f. fisher

9. at times, being bipolar can be an all-consuming challenge, requiring a lot of stamina and even more courage, so if you’re living with this illness and functioning, it’s something to be proud of, not ashamed of - carrie f. fisher

10. rebellions are built on hope - princess/general leia organa + jyn erso

11. we have nothing to lose but our chains - assata shakur

12. keep ya head up - tupac shakur

13. everything i’m not made me everything i am - kanye west

14. i remember you was conflicted

misusing your influence

sometimes i did the same

abusing my power full of resentment

resentment that turned into a deep depression

found myself screaming in the hotel room

i didn’t wanna self destruct

the evils of lucy was all around me

so i went running for answers

until i came home

but that didn’t stop survivor’s guilt

going back and forth trying to convince myself the stripes i earned

or maybe how a-1 my foundation was

but while my loved ones was fighting the continuous war back in the city

i was entering a new one

a war that was based on apartheid and discrimination

made me wanna go back to the city and tell the homies what i learned

the word was respect

just because you wore a different gang color than mine’s

doesn’t mean i can’t respect you as a black man

forgetting all the pain and hurt we caused each other in these streets

if i respect you, we unify and stop the enemy from killing us

but i don’t know, i’m no mortal man

- kendrick lamar

[igottoomuchwriting]

Come To Me

“Yo, Jakey-D!” Jake turned away from his locker to see Rich approaching him.

“Hey!” Jake smiled, giving Rich a fist bump. “What’s up?”

“You gonna go out with uths thiths weekend? The gang iths heading to thiths sthick asths party.” Jake’s face dropped, but went back to a smile before Rich could ask any questions.

“Nah, can’t. Maybe next time?” he asked. Rich frowned, but nodded his head.

“Yeah, of courths. You're alwayths our go-to guy.” Jake smiled and patted him on the shoulder.

“Thanks man.” And then he was gone. Rich watched him walk away with mixed emotions.

“Rich?” he heard a voice call. Rich turned to see Michael looking at him with a concerned look on his face. “What’s wrong dude?”

“Have you noticed anything… odd with Jake?”

“I mean,” Michael started, “the only notice I can see is that he is focusing more on school. But I feel like that makes sense, since it is senior year and all.” Rich nodded his head.

“Yeah. Thanksth man.” Michael nodded his head and went on his way.

“Okay, he is getting out of hand!” Chloe exclaimed. Everyone gave her a weird look.

“Who?” Jeremy asked.

“Jake!”

“What are you talking about, Chloe?” Christine asked as she joined them at the table.

“He hasn’t been partying or drinking with us, and he always says he has homework! He isn’t even here eating with us!”

“And he hasn’t had sex with anyone in weeks,” Jenna calmly added. Brooke hit her arm as everyone shot her a dirty look.

“What?” she asked defensively. “Everyone knows when Jake has sex. Things spread fast.”

“I’m right here,” Rich snapped. “We’ve been dating sthince Stheptember.”

“Oh yeah. I forgot,” she hummed, taking a drink of a smoothie she bought.

“How?!” Brooke exclaimed. Jenna just shrugged. The group decided to move on.

“I doubt there’s anything wrong with him,” Michael began. “I think he may just be stressed.”

“Yeah, finding out your parents got arrested can be pretty stressful.” Everyone stopped and whipped their heads towards Jeremy (ignoring Jenna, who choked on her smoothie).

“What?!” they yelled in unison. Jeremy looked at them in confusion before his face lit up in realization.

“Oh shit! Do you guys not read the newspaper?”

“No!” Chloe yelled.

“Oh-Okay. Well, yeah, um,” he stuttered. “They caught his parents. I think they laundered money or something?”

“I remember that!” Christine gasped. “When he was asking me out, he mentioned his parents were on the run!” Everyone looked around nervously.

“So… what do we do?” Brooke nervously asked.

“I mean, I could talk to him?” Even though he suggested it, Rich was unsure. Would Jake really be happy that his friends found out about his parents?

“I think that would be best,” Michael mumbled, giving a side glance to Rich. Everyone nodded in agreement.

Rich leaned forward and placed his head on his arm. Christine asked what everyone thought of the new play, which prompted a heated discussion that Rich didn’t bother to join. He was more focused on Jake.

Rich closed his eyes and thought about how Jake has been acting for the past few days, possibly weeks. Had he been closed off? Was he upset, scared, angry, and Rich just didn’t care to notice?

To [Jakey-D]: hey can i come over

[Jakey-D]: IDK, i have a lot of work :/

To [Jakey-D]: i do too. i need help

[Jakey-D]: with what?

To [Jakey-D]: math

[Jakey-D]: ok

Rich cheered in victory. He didn’t think he would have been able to convince Jake to let him come over, but he’s got those smooth moves.

He ignores the possibility that Jake only cares about helping him with math and nothing else as he pulls on his shoes and head out the door. As he walks , he starts thinking of math problems that he actually did need help with, because he knew that if he got there and Jake found out he lied, wouldn’t be happy.

It wasn’t long until Rich arrived at his house. He didn’t bother to knock - since a month into their relationship , Jake gave Rich permission to just walk in.

“Jake?” he called when he walked in.

“In the dining room!” he heard his voice yell back. Rich took off his shoes and entered the house, heading towards the dining room.

He saw Jake sitting at the table, hunched over a math book with a hand in his hair. He turned his head and got up when he saw Rich walk in.

“Hey, babe,” he mumbled. He placed a hand on Rich’s waist and placed a kiss on his cheek.

“Sthup.” Jake chuckled at the lisp, but Rich knew it wasn’t a mocking laugh. He has told him on many occasions that he thought it was cute, so Rich stopped trying to hide it from him. “You look tired.”

“Yeah,” Jake sighed. “I’ve been getting alotta school work and looking at colleges is adding more stress.”

“Why haven’t you come talk to me? You know I’m here for you.” Jake nodded his head.

“Let’s get some homework done, and then we can cuddle or something.”

“Oh, I like the sthound of ‘sthomething’.” Jake laughed and slapped his waist.

“Come on, you horn dog.”

The couple spent the next two hours working on math. Rich had to admit, Jake really did help him understand the trig identities or whatever they were learning right now.

Rich groaned and leaned back in his chair.

“You alright over there?” Jake asked.

“I’m bored. We’ve been doing math homework for hourths!” Jake laughed and closed his math book.

“Okay, we can take a break.” Rich cheered in delight, which made Jake laugh harder.

Rich walked over to where Jake was sitting. “A break waths exactly what I waths thinking.” Rich leaned down for a kiss and Jake happily complied, moving their lips in sync.

Rich placed a hand on Jake’s shoulder, pushing Jake further back in his chair. Jake turned the chair and grabbed Rich by the waist, pulling him closer. However, when Rich tried deepening the kiss, Jake pushed him back.

“Hey, hey,” Jake mumbled when Rich tried kissing him again. “As much as I want to continue, and believe me, your lips are making this hard.” He placed a kiss on Rich’s lips as Rich chuckled. “I have to pee, and I know you don’t have a piss kink.” Rich laughed and stepped back, putting is hands up in surrender.

“Alright, alright. Go pisths.” Jake nodded his head and stood up, disappearing down the hall.

Rich walked into the kitchen in search for something to drink. When grabbing a cup, he looked down to see a newspaper on the counter. Rich gave it a closer look and saw a woman and a man’s mugshot on the front page. It took only a second for Rich to realize that it was Jake’s parents. Rich quickly grabbed the paper and started reading the article.  

“Babe? Where’d you go?”

“In here!” Rich called, eyes never leaving the paper. He heard Jake walk in, but he still didn’t lift his head.

Suddenly, the paper was ripped from his hands.

“What the fuck, Rich?!” he angrily snapped.

“Jake, what- “Why are you going through my shit?!”

“What do you mean I’m going through your sthit?” Rich gaped. “It waths right here on the counter!”

“That gives you no reason to read it.” He crumbled up the paper and threw it in the trash next to him.

“I think I have a right to look at a newthspaper when my boyfriend’ths parenths are on the front page!” Rich snapped back. He didn’t want to fight, he really didn’t, but Jake was getting defensive and angry, which in turn made Rich angry.

Jake tensed up and kept his eyes trained on the floor. Rich watched him clench his fists and take deep breaths, trying to calm himself.

“What’ths going on, Jake?” Rich finally asked. Jake turned his head away, but otherwise, did not move.

“You read the article. You know exactly is going on.”

“No, I don’t. Let’ths pretend I never read the article.” He paused to watch Jake. “I want to hear from you about what iths going on.” Jake slowly unclenched his fists and relaxed. They sat in silence, neither making a move.

Finally, Jake spoked in a broken voice.

“They’re going to jail, Rich.” Tears welled up in his eyes and Jake furiously rubbed them away. “They-They got caught by the police, an-and they got arrested. Laundering is a federal crime, Rich, and,and I-” A soon as a sob left his mouth, Rich ran over and pulled him into a hug. Jake wrapped his arms around him and buried his head into the crook of his neck, letting out a loud sob. Rich rubbed his back and cooed, trying to comfort Jake.

“I-I don’t w-want to lo-ose them,” he choked out. Rich shushed him.

“I know, Jake, I know.” Rich doesn’t know how long they stood there. Eventually, Jake started calming down, and Rich didn’t stop rubbing his back until there was only sniffles here and there.

“Iths thiths why you’ve been working all the time?” Jake nodded his head and pulled him closer.

“W-With the end of Senior year coming up, I don’t want to be seen as the kid whose parents stole money and ran. Who is gonna stop college and jobs from not hiring me because of it?” Jake took a deep, shaky breath. “I don’t want my grades to back that fear.” Rich hummed in agreement.

“Iths that althso why you haven’t been drinking with uths?” Jake nodded his head.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t want to risk getting caught.”

“Don’t apologize,” Rich hushed. “Just- Next time, come to me? I waths worried.” Jake pulled back and stared at Rich with his red, puffy eyes. Rich leaned up and placed a kiss on his cheek. “Of courth, there ithsn’t going to be a next time.”

Jake chuckled, nodding his head and close his eyes. “I don’t think I want to study anymore tonight,” he softly spoke.

“Yeah,” he whispered. “Let’ths go cuddle on our bed and watch a sthow. No school, no college, justht-”

“Inaccurate cop shows,” Jake finished. Rich chuckled.

“Yeah, inaccurate cop shows.”

[thetwoplayergays]

ok um i'm trash but um can i have a fic where like michael is really protective of jeremy (for whatever reason) and just everyone is gay and it's great

Ay, back at it again with the late replies to asks I should have done ages ago (IM SORRY). Hope this will suffice, thank you for the prompt!

——

The plan was for Jeremy to get out of hospital, ask out Christine and live a normal high school life as a normal high school teenager - now with a few more friends. What Jeremy wasn’t anticipating was Michael’s change in attitude when he got back.

Michael, his best friend for twelve years, had suddenly become very… attached to Jeremy. He hadn’t noticed at first, focusing more on his plan to ask out Christine or catching up on any work that The Squip had previously deemed ‘uncool’ or 'useless’. But as the days went by Jeremy began to notice Michael’s presence more and more. Sure, it wasn’t uncommon for Michael to have his bad days and follow Jeremy around for the majority of the school day but by the end of the week Jeremy couldn’t think of one instance where Michael had left his side.

When Monday came, Jeremy found Michael waiting outside his house to walk to school. The two stood side by side as Michael hopped along the pavement with his headphones around his neck, looking around as if he was expecting someone to pop out behind the passing houses. As he began to calm down, Jeremy took a closer look at his best friend. He noticed that his eyes were slightly more droopy than normal, little bags had begun to form underneath them. His hair was ruffled and he was wearing the wrong shoes, as if he was in a hurry to leave the house. Despite this, Michael still wore his generic giddy smile on his face, the look which made Jeremy’s heart melt slightly on the inside.

At lunch time, Rich and Jake approached the two, asking if they wanted to join them at their table in the far corner of the cafeteria. There sat the rest of the group - Brooke, Chloe, Jenna and Christine - eagerly waving at the best friends. Before Jeremy could reply with some cheap excuse as to why he wasn’t feeling well all of a sudden, Michael jumped in between them, turning to Jeremy.

“Come on dude, lets go sit with them! It’ll- It’ll be fun,” he stammered out the last past, suddenly dragging his best friend across the hall before he had a chance to protest. Under his breath, Jeremy heard him mutter “no harm done yeah? Yeah…”

Jeremy, naive Jeremy, brushed off the encounter as Michael just acting up as he sometimes did. But a few days later Jeremy was walking down the hallway on the way to his next class when he heard Michael catch up to him, skidding to a stop once he reached his best friend.

“How was math?” He small talked, slurping the remains of his slushie.

“It was fine, I guess. I wish Mr David would ease up on the homework though, I’m starting to get-” before Jeremy could continue, he was stopped in his tracks by Michael. He turned to see a mixture of anger and fright on his face, a look that really didn’t suit him. Jeremy tried to follow his line of sight but was cut off by Christine shouting his name from down the hallway. He looked back and waved, but when he returned to his best friend’s gaze it was gone, replaced with what looked to be a sympathetic smile as he saw Christine.

“I’ll… uh- catch up with you later Jer,” he mumbled before setting off in the opposite direction without letting Jeremy say a word.

Jeremy tried to give Christine a decent conversation but it was clear he was distracted by something else. He kept turning to look down the hallway in which Michael had seen something, making him stop dead in his tracks. He couldn’t help but wonder what he had seen. Jeremy briefly heard Christine asking if he was alright, to which he replied some rehearsed nonsense about being tired from schoolwork while he continued to focus on the hallway.

It wasn’t until Friday afternoon that he discovered what Michael had been so frightened of.

Jeremy had just finished play rehearsal with the gang and was making his way through the school hallways to go home. Just as the doors came into sight, he spotted a group of - maybe two or three - boys hanging around the doorway, blocking the entrance. They seemed to be waiting for someone, so Jeremy naturally assumed they were one of the many friends of Jake or Chloe. However, as he began to approach, one of the boys spotted him coming and alerted the other two of his arrival. Confused, Jeremy stopped walking and spoke up;

“Um hi… could I get past please? You’re kind of blocking the door,” he stuttered, trying not to mess up his wording in front of the intimidating boys. But neither moved an inch. Instead, the main boy came forward, speaking slowly and articulating his words so precisely it sent a shiver down Jeremy’s spine.

“That was kind of the point mate,” he chuckled and the other two joined in. “We were just waiting for someone…”

“Oh…” said Jeremy, slowly shifting his feet. “W-who?”

Deep down, he already knew the answer.

“You.”

Now, Jeremy had dealt with bullies before, being a loser and all. He was used to the unoriginal insults and the occasional shove. But these guys were clearly not messing around, going out of their way to wait for him after school and everything. Jeremy took a step backwards in fear.

“You’re the guy that possessed my brother yeah?” The main boy snarled. Jeremy’s face twitched for a second, taking another step back.

“P-possessed?!”

“He told me bout it. Said some dude in his drama rehearsal tried to take over the whole cast. Course, the guy doesn’t care now. He’s way too forgiving for his own good my brother,” the boy continued, slowly inching forwards. His friends had now joined his march a few feet behind him. “Fortunately for you, I’m nothing like the guy. I’m a solid believer that you deserve what’s coming to you buddy.”

Jeremy wasn’t entirely sure what to do. He couldn’t keep retreating forever, the gang would eventually catch up to him, and there was no way he was going to slip past these three boys. Caught up in his thinking, he stopped retreating. Jeremy realised his mistake too late as he felt his whole body smash up against a locker. His head smacked the metal plating behind him, causing an immediate headache to rush into his head. He blinked and locked eyes with the bully.

“Or maybe, I just want an excuse to beat up a nerd,” he smirked, lifting his fist to the air. His two friends stood back, watching the whole ordeal go down without interfering. Jeremy shut his eyes closed and tensed up, preparing himself for a blow to the face at any moment.

Instead, he felt his body suddenly drop the ground as a loud grunt came from the boy. Confused, he peeled his eyes open to see the previously menacing boy sprawled across the floor with a bloody nose. His two friends had stepped back in fear at the cause of the punch. The guy responsible stepped forward and glared at the two, signalling - or warning - for them to leave. They did as instructed, picking up the brother and rushing out the door without saying a word.

Jeremy’s head had began to ease up just enough for him to start to process what had just happened when his arm was flown over a shoulder and he was heaved up onto his feat. The familiar smell of weed and slushie suddenly hit him and he knew exactly who had come to him rescue.

“Michael?” He spat out, turning to face the boy. Now that he was fully standing on his own, he could focus on the boy. Michael’s face was covered in sweat. His eyes glimmered with a hint of fear and relief at the sight of his best friend and a large bruise had begun to form on his knuckle from where he had punched the bully.

“Michael,” he said again, this time more definite. It was at that point where Michael’s intimidating persona faded as his eyes began to well up with tears. He flung himself onto Jeremy and dug his head in his neck as he began to sob.

“I’m- I’m sorry I just…” he muttered through his tears, “I heard them… when you came back to school- they were talking about what they were going to do to you- and I just… I just wanted to make sure that you were ok-”

“Thank you Michael,” was all Jeremy could muster before his eyes too began to fill up with tears. The boys sat there, in the school hallway, for about ten minutes silently crying until Jeremy sat up and pulled Michael up with him as they slowly made their way out of the building.

——

“Morning!” Jeremy greeted his friends by the school entrance. By his side was Michael with his bandaged knuckle and huge smile on his face.

“Morning bro!” Replied Jake. The group shared a quick conversation before entering the school and as they walked down the hallway Michael stood proudly by Jeremy’s side.

“Oh my gosh Michael,” exclaimed Christine as she noticed the white bandages across his hand, “what happened? Are you hurt?”

“Don’t worry Chris,” replied Jeremy, putting a hand on his best friend’s shoulder, “he’s got it under control.”

Just up ahead, a brief conversation between Rich and Jake could be heard.

“Now that I think about it, my bro was acting a little strange last night. He came home with a broken nose and started ranting on about this dude in a hoodie.”

“No way!” Rich cried, “your bro got beat up by some kid in a jacket?”

“Yeah yeash,” replied Jake who appeared to be pondering the thought. “He said someone about him being utterly terrifying, looming over him and protecting his lanky best-”

Slowly, the two boys locked eyes and turned to find Michael’s hand bruised after Christine insisted on changing the bandage. He looked up to see the boys staring and smirked. Turning to Jeremy, he flew an arm around his shoulder and paraded forward, passing the two as he went. Turning round, Michael brought his damaged hand up to his eyes and returned the glare, signalling NOT to touch his best friend in case they also wanted a piece of what he could do.

Deep down, Michael just wanted his hand to heal quicker. He couldn’t press the buttons on the controller properly with a bruised knuckle, but the image of being a type of bodyguard for Jeremy - it made it all worthwhile.

[bookstoreromantic]

Took My Love (took it down) 2/3

Summary: The tight-knit town of Storybrooke isn’t exactly the world’s most ideal place to be licking one’s wounds, but even a town where everyone knows everyone else (and their business) can still provide the odd surprise. (Or, the Tortured Musician fic featuring ex bartender Emma Swan.)

Rating: M (overall)

Part One

Also available on FFnet and AO3. With thanks to @swallowedsong and @initiala.

ii.

��         He takes a cab home and makes for the kitchen as soon as he’s in the door, pulling open all the cupboards until he finds what he’s looking for — the full bottle of whiskey he picked up the last time he re-stocked his liquor supply. Killian takes it with him to the couch and doesn’t bother with pacing himself, willing the alcohol to do its work. He’ll get no rest otherwise, his mind an angry mess of Milah’s screams and Emma’s moans and bloody hell.

          It’s takes nearly half a bottle before he passes out and the sun is bouncing off the flat’s greige-ish walls by the time he finally rouses.

          He feels like shit. His head is pounding and his throat is dry but it’s not enough to make him forget any of the night before. To wipe away the memory of the stunning blonde he’d held in his arms, the way she’d kissed him like she was trying to prove a point, how he’d been so close to losing himself in her.

          How it had all gone to shit once he’d heard the ambulance.

          Killian gets himself some water and re-settles on the couch, stretching out and resolving to wait until the nausea passes before he figures out how to get his car back to town. He’ll probably wind up paying the garage to tow it back but he can’t even think about setting anything up just yet. It’s not like he’s in a rush. He’s quite certain that he’s not going to leave the couch until he has to open the store on Monday.

          He spends the afternoon alternating between napping and watching old movies on tv. Killian knows he should shower but he can still smell her — Emma — on him and he can’t bring himself to wash it away. Kissing her was the most alive he’d felt in ages. Perhaps all this time he should have been trying to fuck his pain away instead of drowning it.

          When Liam lets himself in sometime in the evening he startles awake, jolting up and pushing the hair out of his face.

          His brother just stands and regards him from the doorway. “You missed dinner.”

          Killian scowls as Liam enters the flat. He’s in no bloody mood for another lecture. “I’m sorry,” he drawls. “Did your culinary skills improve in my absence?”

          Liam frowns at him but heads for the kitchenette with a tinfoil-wrapped package that he assumes are leftovers. “You’d better hope so,” he says. Closing the fridge door, he looks around the apartment with disdain. “Bloody hell, Killian. I gave you this place so you could have your privacy, not so you could trash it.”

           “You gave it to me so I’d be out of your hair,” he argues, standing from the couch as his brother starts rinsing out the empties that litter the counter. If they’re going to have this fight again, best to get it done with quickly. “I only came to this sodding town because you asked me to. You want me to leave? Say the word.”

          “I don’t want you to leave. I want you to try.”

          Killian rolls his eyes. “Are you never going tire of giving the same bloody speech nearly every week? You asked me to come and help with the store and that’s what I’m doing. The rest of my life is none of your damn business.”

          “Of course it’s my business!” Liam explodes, slamming a bottle down on the counter so hard he’s surprised it doesn’t break. “You’re my little brother, it’s always going to be my business!”

           “Worry about your wife, Liam,” he sneers. “Worry about your son. Don’t worry about me. I’ll be fine.” Killian yanks open the fridge door and grabs a beer, twisting off the cap. “Always am, eventually.”

          His brother watches him as he takes a swig with the same look on his face that he used to see on their father all the time. Anger mixed with just enough disappointment to make you feel like it’s your fault. The difference being, of course, that it is his fault now, whereas their father was an abusive shit who blamed his sons for the crumbling state of his marriage. Liam is twice the man that Brennan ever was; if anything, it’s Killian who inherited the Jones temperament, his anger getting the better of him more times than he can count. Which is probably why it’s always a shock when he sees flashes of it in his brother.

          Killian stares down the ghost of their father like he used to do the man himself and eventually Liam’s shoulders drop. Shaking his head and turning away, he takes another beer from the fridge and walks over to the couch. Killian hesitates a moment but follows, sitting down next to him but keeping his eyes on the television while his brother rests his elbows on his knees and sighs.

           “I asked you here because I wanted us to help each other. I need to believe that we can get through this.”

          Killian shuts his eyes for a long moment after the admission. “Jones boys can get through anything,” he says finally, resigned. “It’s just rarely pretty.”

          Liam snorts. “Cheers to that, brother.”

          He tips his beer to his and they both drink, a more comfortable silence settling between them.

           “I saw Michael Tillman bring your car back earlier,” Liam says after a minute or so. “You get kicked out of another pub last night?”

          He is never going to bloody live down getting banned from Granny’s.

          Killian shakes his head. He was in no state to drive but his brother doesn’t need to know that. “Didn’t even get drunk,” he answers. “Just didn’t want to risk a ticket from the good Sheriff Nolan.”

          “When you didn’t come to dinner I assumed you were hungover still.”

          “Oh no, I got home, then I got drunk.”

          “Pretty raven-haired lass hit on you again?”

          “A blonde, actually. And I’m fairly certain I started it.”

          Liam’s brows pop up in surprise. “Aye, blondes are dangerous,” he says, leaning back into the couch cushions. “They sneak up on you.”

          Emma takes her seat at the table in the loft and wonders from looking at the feast just how long Mary Margaret has been itching to do a real Sunday dinner. It’s the middle of June and the loft doesn’t have any air conditioning, but that hasn’t stopped her future sister in-law from making a pork roast complete with gravy, mashed potatoes, and three different veggie options. And if the rumours are true, there’s blueberry pie stashed away for dessert.

          She hasn’t had a meal like it since Ruth passed away and Emma quickly shoves a forkful of meat in her mouth to cover up the pang in her chest. Her foster mom had started family dinners when Emma came back from Phoenix in an attempt to make their lives normal again for Henry’s sake — although she’s still not sure what it is that infants are supposed to gain from everyone else eating a roast for dinner. Still, the tradition had stuck for almost nine years. She hadn’t realized she’d missed it when they moved to New York.

           “So, Emma,” Mary Margaret says, passing the beans and carrots over to David. “How was your night out with Ruby?”

          Emma sputters on her wine and sets the glass down to wipe her hand on her napkin. “Uh, it was fun. I think she met someone, so it was good.”

          “Oh, that’s nice.” She waits a beat and then, “Did you?”

          Emma bites her tongue on, do you mean did I almost have sex in the back seat of the bug until the guy freaked out and suddenly couldn’t get out of the car fast enough, to the point where he literally ran away from me?

           “Nope!” she squeaks, smiling brightly in hopes that it’s enough to hide her flush of embarrassment. “It’s a little quick to be looking right now, don’t you think?”

          “Speaking of looking,” David says, too casually for it to be anything but a segue into her breakup. He knows she knows it too, because next thing he’s holding up his hand in concession. “I’m not going to ask what happened with Walsh. You don’t want to talk about it, that’s fine. But do you guys have a place to stay when you go back to New York? Do you need any help finding something?”

          Emma’s eyes drop to her plate and she forks a carrot, dragging it through her mashed potatoes to buy some time. She’d made promises to Henry on the drive up of this being the start of a new adventure but they hadn’t really talked about it any more since then. And as far as her son or anyone else knows, she still has a job in New York waiting for her when they get back.

           “I… I was thinking we might go someplace else actually. Maybe Boston, or Philly, or someplace a little warmer?”

          She glances over at Henry to gauge his reaction in time to see him go from slouched and shoveling food in his mouth to sitting ramrod straight in his chair within an instant. Emma smiles and watches all the gears turn in his head while he chews.

          Finally he swallows and sets his fork down on the edge of the plate before turning around in his chair so that he’s facing her. “What if we just stayed here?”

          Emma’s brows pinch together and a nagging feeling takes hold in her gut. Henry had been so excited about moving to New York a few years ago — had called it a heroic quest and given it one of his secret codenames. And he’d loved exploring the city with her whenever she had time off. She’d thought for sure he’d be just as excited about moving now as he had been then.

           “I don’t know, kid,” she starts, knowing she has to try and dampen the idea but Henry leaps in before she can dig up an argument against it.

           “What about just for the summer? Choosing a new city, that’s a big decision. We should do research together and find a place that’s perfect.”

           “That’s not a bad idea actually,” David chimes in and Henry spins in his chair to face his uncle. “I’d sure sleep better knowing you’ve got something set up wherever it is that you go.”

          Emma hasn’t had to deal with her son and foster brother ganging up on her for three years and she’s unprepared for the full weight of their puppy dog eyes turned on her. She turns to try and appeal to Mary Margaret — even the scales a little bit —  but the other woman just meets her eyes with a knowing smirk that makes Emma suspect this ganging up is a regular occurrence during Henry’s visits.

           “I can’t just take the whole summer off work,” she argues. Very reasonably, she thinks.

          David waves a hand and goes back to systematically stabbing his green beans. “You’d quit your job to change cities anyway and I have the budget for an administrative assistant at the sheriff’s station.”

          I’ve already quit my job, she thinks. Going back to New York has never been in her plan. “Preferential treatment for your foster sister could work against you in the next election, you know.”

          He shrugs. “It’s just for the summer. I’ll clear it with the mayor, she owes me one anyways.”

          “Please, Mom?”

          Emma still wants to argue. David’s done enough and given up enough for her in his life, he doesn’t need to be calling in favours now too. But Henry’s so earnest and excited and she doesn’t… She’s uprooted their lives so abruptly. And it’s her fault for not seeing what Walsh was doing behind her back, for bringing him into their lives in the first place. Maybe she owes it to her son to plan their next steps a little more carefully.

           “Okay, fine. But I’m not working at the station. If I can find something else to tide us over for the summer, then we’ll stay.”

          There’s a yellow bug parked in front of Granny’s.

          Killian stares at it for far longer than he should. But it’s hard to look away when for the second night in a row his dreams featured flashes of blonde hair and a woman who was always just out of reach. He stands for so long — there’s no way it’s hers, it must be a coincidence — that he forgets he’s stepped into the road until Leroy honks, swerving to avoid him as he drives by. Cursing under his breath and shaking himself out of his stupor, Killian forces himself away from the little vintage car and sprints over to the bakery across from the shop.

          His mind must still be comparing the bug to his memories from Saturday night though, because as he pulls open the door to Storybrooke Country Bread he practically collides with a boy around his nephew’s age.

           “Henry! Watch where you’re going!”

           “Sorry!”

          “No worries, lad,” he says reassuringly, smiling down at the mop of brown hair before his eyes move up to the mother and — Oh.

          She’s dressed casually, just jeans and a t-shirt paired with some little black boots, but she’s just as gorgeous as she was in the leather dress and bloody hell he is so screwed.

          Emma’s eyes go wide in recognition and he winces, scratching uncomfortably behind his ear. Whatever chance he might have had with her he surely blew when he panicked and fled and yet he can’t bring himself to regret suggesting they step outside.

          “Um, hi.”

          Killian wets his lips and puts on a tight smile. “Hello.”

          He’s never felt so awkward in his life and the boy is looking between the two of them with an expression that says he knows far more than he should and maybe Killian should just turn around, get his lunch someplace else. He can call Liam — no, his brother would tease him mercilessly if he found out that the Great Killian Jones had run away from a lass not once but twice. He’ll bribe Erik into bringing him a sandwich instead. Eleven year-old boys are always interested in taking bribes.

          He’s so caught up in his escape plan that he doesn’t realize he’s blocking the exit until Emma takes a step forward and gestures to the door.

          “We’re just going to, uh —”

          “Right!” he says, jumping out of the way. “Right, sorry. I just… sorry.”

          If she realizes that he’s apologizing for more than being in the way, she doesn’t comment on it, just shoots him a bemused sort of look as she ushers her son out of the bakery. Killian groans as soon as the door clicks shut behind them, closing his eyes to block out the absolute fuckery that is his life.

          Twice now he’s bungled run-ins with the only woman who’s piqued his interest since Milah. That is, of course, if you can call what they did in her car two nights ago a “run-in.”

          (God, that car. She must be staying at Granny’s and he can’t help but wonder how long it will be parked there, next door to where he lives and works, torturing him.)

          “She bought bear claws.”

          He’s startled out of his thoughts by Tink, who’s watching him from behind the counter with a face that says while she’s not outright laughing at him, it’s a near thing.

          “I’m sorry, what?”

          “She bought bear claws. Said they were her favourite. Just in case you were wondering.”

          Killian blinks even as he tucks the information away. “I wasn’t.”

          “Right,” she drawls, clearly not believing him. “So, the usual then?”

          He fell hard for the bakery’s ready-to-eat quiche back when he was first exiled from Granny’s and manages to make it through the transaction and back to the store without embarrassing himself further. Part of him itches to find out more about his new neighbour — Storybrooke isn’t exactly known for its bustling tourism industry, after all. But that would mean either inserting himself into the small town gossip machine that’s so enjoyed picking him apart these last few months or asking his brother, both of which are abhorrent prospects. Liam can be a dullard at times but even he would be able to put the blonde at the bar together with the blonde from the bakery.

          Worse still would be if Elsa found out. Killian may be a miserable drunk half the time, but not even he has the heart to turn down his sister in-law’s more gentle brand of matchmaking. The fact that’s he’s actually interested only makes it worse.

          No, there’s nothing to do but suck it up, accept that she probably thinks him a fool, and pray to God that he doesn’t trip over his own feet should he see her again. It sounds great, as far as resolutions go. And if he could get her out of his mind for even just an hour it would sound a lot more convincing too.

          It takes Emma all of two days to land a job as the interim manager at Any Given Sundae. She’d scooped icecream back as a teenager the first year she came to Storybrooke and hadn’t exactly been looking to get into it again. But when Ingrid finds out that she’s looking for a job she practically falls over herself to offer Emma the position. Apparently she was supposed to spend two months in Norway visiting her sisters but her planned replacement got sick and pulled out and she was afraid she’d have to cancel the trip. Emma spends a couple days re-learning how to scoop the perfect ice cream cone and getting a feel for the business side of things and then she’s on her own.

          Somehow, very quickly, she’s wound up committed to this whole ‘Storybrooke for the summer’ plan… and everything that goes with it. So when Henry begs to be signed up for the house league soccer program even though the registration deadline was a month ago, she makes it happen. And when Mary Margaret requests (more like coerces) her help with wedding shopping, Emma goes along. Which is how she winds up following her future sort-of sister-in-law through each ribbon and bead and silk flower packed aisle of the local Crafts ‘n More on her lunch break.

          The school teacher’s plan to send each of her guests home with a handmade birdhouse is nice and all, she supposes, but if she gets roped into a favour decorating party later on she might have to reconsider staying in Storybrooke after all.

           “So this must be a little weird for you. Helping with wedding planning.”

          Emma stops running her fingers through the trays of tiny beads and frowns. She’s helping plan a wedding now?

          “Not really,” she answers carefully. “Walsh and I never got to that point.”

          “It’s okay if you had cold feet, you know. I know we only met Walsh the one time and that David can be… protective. But his heart’s always been in the right place and we only want what’s best for you and Henry.”

           “It’s not his heart that I’m worried about,” Emma says, half under her breath. Really, it’s a miracle that her foster brother ever got elected sheriff, given how many people he’s threatened to punch in the face.

          Mary Margaret has made a profession out of instilling life lessons in others and she’s half expecting to get one now but when the other woman doesn’t push any further Emma just sighs. The truth is she doesn’t know what’s best for her and her son. She’s never been able to see further than the problems that were always right in her face. The foster system doesn’t exactly create dreamers and long-term planners.

          “I didn’t want to get married,” she confesses. “I thought it was too soon. But I was happy and I didn’t want to lose him so we compromised. I would wear the ring, Henry and I would move in, and he’d never pressure me to set a date.”

          “But that changed? Once you were all living under the same roof?”

          “No, nothing changed. It was great. It was even better than it was before because I had someone to pick up after me. I started to think, y’know, maybe we should get married. Not, like, immediately, but — we were going to go away for a couple days, while Henry was here with you guys, and I thought… maybe I could surprise him by picking a date.”

          “What happened?”

          It’s just them in the aisle and Mary Margaret has closed the distance between them but Emma still drops her voice to barely above a whisper.

          “When we moved in, Walsh told me that he’d already given post-dated cheques for the rent, that I could just give him my share in cash each month for now and then when the lease came up we’d put my name on it.” She fiddles with the stem of one of the fake flowers that Mary Margaret had been holding and takes a deep breath. “The day I left, the landlord came by looking for rent. He said that we were four months overdue. There were never any post-dated cheques, he’d just been stealing from me all that time.”

           “Oh, honey.” Mary Margaret takes her hands but doesn’t try to pry the flower from her grip, just gives her fingers a reassuring squeeze before saying the most stereotypical thing a small-town elementary school teacher can say to someone who’s been living in New York for the past three years. “Was it… drugs?”

          Emma can’t even begrudge her for it, she just shakes her head. “Gambling. It didn’t take much digging to find out and once I did I just — I had to get out of there.”

          Mary Margaret wraps her in a hug immediately and Emma takes a moment to make sure she’s not crying before pulling back.

          “Promise me you won’t tell David,” she says. “He never approved of Henry and I moving to New York. I don’t want to give him any more reason to —” Emma stops short of finishing her sentence, and takes a moment to reset and blink away the still-threatening tears. Get a grip already, Christ. “I just don’t want it to be a big thing again when we leave at the end of the summer.”

          “I won’t tell David, even though you know how I feel about keeping secrets. But, Emma, you should. Your brother loves you, he’s not going to judge you for this.”

           “I don’t want anyone to know,” she insists. “Telling him’s not going to do anything but keep me thinking about it and I am so tired of thinking about it. I just need to find a way to… I just need to put it behind me.”

          Mary Margaret squeezes her shoulder and takes the poor mutilated silk flower out of her hands. “I think this summer is going to be good for you,” she says. “I think it might be just what you need.”

          He’s been dreaming of Milah lately. Actually of her, not just of her death. Killian dreams of her laugh, of the way her hips moved when she sang, how her face lit up the first time he let her steal the pickle from his sandwich. He dreams of Milah and when his alarm goes off in the morning it doesn’t sound like sirens. It’s been almost a week now that he hasn’t needed rum to blanket the sound of twisting metal and screaming at night. He’s not sure what’s changed, but God, he’s willing to give almost anything to keep it from going back.

          It’s made his days easier too and while he may have so far escaped unsolicited commentary from his brother he knows the shift has not gone unnoticed. Still, there’s some hesitancy on Liam’s part to trust it, which is how Killian finds himself having a very different argument with him come Sunday afternoon.

          “Honestly, brother, it’s fine. I can take the lad.”

          “It’s not just taking him to the field, Killian. You have to stick around for the game. We’re on orange and popsicle duty this week.”

          “I think I can manage two coolers and an eleven year-old.”

          “You’re sure?”

          He sighs and picks up one of the ice chests from where it’s sitting on the table between them. “Go take your wife to the hospital, brother. I’ve got this.”

          Elsa and Erik come down the stairs and Liam nods, stacking the second cooler in his arms. “Uncle Killian’s going to take you to your football game,” he says to Erik, wrapping a shawl around Elsa’s shoulders and guiding her to the door. “Score a goal for your mum, okay?”

          “Okay.”

          Elsa kisses her son’s forehead and the door closes behind them and then it’s just Killian and his nephew for the first time, really, since he came to town, watching each other from across the house.

          “Well, lad,” he says, resting his chin atop the two coolers. “I’m going to need you to either take one of these or open up the car for me.”

          Elsa was diagnosed with acute myeloid leukemia back in February on what was, to hear his brother tell it, the coldest, most miserable day of any winter he’d ever seen. Milah had died a few months before and Killian’s not sure which Jones had been more of a mess when Liam hunted him down and brought him Storybrooke a few weeks later. He’s never prodded for details on his sister in-law’s treatment, but he knows that the initial induction therapy she’d gone through before his arrival had been successful and that the chemotherapy she’s been undergoing every month since is to try and stop it from coming back.

          It’s not his first bone marrow biopsy day, in other words, and he knows from experience that test days always put his nephew on edge. The first round of chemotherapy had been a difficult ordeal for everyone, and Liam had struggled mightily with Elsa in the hospital. Summer sporting events might not be in his regular job description but the entire reason Liam brought Killian to Storybrooke was so that the elder Jones could try and keep things as normal as possible for his boy. And in the summer, normal means football.

          It’s killing Liam to not be coaching this year on account of Elsa’s illness, and his brother has not taken the demotion to honorary assistant coach well. It’s only the second game of the season and Killian’s already sick of his brother’s grousing every time the new coach calls it ‘soccer.’ A far worse offense, in his opinion, is the team’s name. While neighbouring towns get to be Dragons and Knights and Gorgons, his nephew is stuck playing for the Storybrooke Snowmen — which doesn’t fit the theme at all, no matter how many ‘abominable’ adjectives are thrown around by parents attempting to soothe their children’s pre-pubescent egos.

          The high school field that’s been adapted for 9v9 play isn’t far and ordinarily he’d suggest they walk but with the two coolers the car is a must. The pitch brings back memories of Killian’s own youth and makes him think that he almost wouldn’t mind sticking around for another year to see Liam coach a fleet of lads as they adjust to the full-size playing field. He’s not set any plans beyond staying through the course of Elsa’s treatment, isn’t even sure if his presence would be welcome once Liam’s able to return to a regular work week. He’s not exactly been pleasant to be around, after all.

          But perhaps orange and popsicle duty will start to make up for that. Erik’s out of the car and joining his friends almost as soon as Killian pulls into the spot which means he gets to unload the Snowmen’s half-time and post-game snacks on his own. The chests aren’t heavy but they are cumbersome — Liam probably couldn’t have found bigger ones if he’d tried. He’s still trying to adjust the bulky coolers when he trips on the curb, nearly crashing into someone as he recovers his footing.

          “I’m sorry!” he calls out around the load in his arms. They’d swung wildly in his attempt to avoid a collision and he lifts them a little higher, trying his best to shuffle them back into position.

          The top one is removed from his hold and with his field of vision clear he suddenly finds himself staring at the very woman whose car has taunted him all week.

          Killian knows — very well, thank you — that his mouth is hanging open and yet he can’t think of a single non-idiotic thing to say. A stammered “Uh...” is about all he manages.

          Emma seems as surprised as he is because almost immediately the cooler is placed back on top of the other one — nice and straight this time, mind you.

         “Don’t worry about it,” she says brusquely, snapping him back to earth.

         “Right,” he says. “Well, thank you.” Killian gives himself to the count of three before lowering the coolers to look but she’s already gone. He didn’t really expect otherwise given how she’d stared at him like a deer caught in the headlights but it stings nonetheless. He knows he let his issues fuck up their first encounter, but how much longer is he going to have to suffer through fumbling embarrassment over what was supposed to be a one-time thing?

          Killian shakes his head to clear it and makes his way towards the field, barely avoiding tripping over the curb a second time.

          David, Mary Margaret, and Ruby all tag along to watch Henry’s first soccer game and Emma manages to get through it without asking for the scoop on Killian, but it’s harder than she’d like to admit. She resists though, because she knows how Storybrooke works. The town loves an Emma Swan gossip and any amount of curiosity expressed on her part will get the whole rumour mill churning. She’s got a lot of suspicions, but all she’s sure of is that Killian’s been in town for less than a year and that’s only because Henry had no idea who he was when they bumped into him at the bakery.

          She’s got no business being curious. Except for the fact that the guy kissed her like his life depended on it last weekend and then ran away like she was about to kill him rather than suck him off. And really, if she’s going to be bumping into him all summer she should probably know what his deal is, if only so she can try and avoid sending him running into oncoming traffic next time and —

          Yeah, okay, fine. She’s curious. What can she say? Ruby was right. Going out the week before had gotten her mind off Walsh. Gotten her off, period. Really, really successfully. Who could blame her for wanting a round two? Or three. Or just plain trying to finish round one, for that matter. A meaningless summer fling would be the perfect distraction from the rest of her personal life.

          Killian, on the other hand… mostly Emma just wishes she could tell if he’s nervous or terrified around her.

          “Hey, what’s Other Jones doing on popsicle duty?”

          Mary Margaret looks up from her crochet project and frowns. “Elsa must have a doctor’s appointment.”

          Well, that’s interesting, Emma thinks. The Joneses moved to town around the time that she and Henry left so she doesn’t know all that much about them, but it gives her something to go on. (She’s heard about Elsa’s cancer diagnosis through the grapevine of course — she’d been Ingrid’s original replacement at Any Given Sundae so it’s a hot topic with her customers.)

          And if the way David is glaring across the field is any indication, Killian is not the same upstanding citizen that his — brother? Cousin? — has turned out to be.

         “Are we sure it’s popsicles in that cooler?” her foster brother grumbles.

         Neither of her friends answer him but Mary Margaret hums and Ruby flips one of her pigtails dismissively over her shoulder. (She’d put mini pom-poms in them to come cheer Henry on and it’s the very definition of a look that only Ruby could pull off.) Before Emma can ask what town gossip she’s clearly missed out on Henry comes bounding over to the bleachers, sticky red popsicle juice only half wiped off his chin.

          “Hey, Mom, can I go over to Ava and Nicolas’ for dinner? Mr. Tillman said it was okay.”

          “What, you’re tired of Granny’s cooking already? I’m gonna tell her you said that, you know.”

          Henry rolls his eyes at her and she shoos him off with a laugh. Her kid is obviously lapping up their extended stay in Storybrooke and as much as she might long for the buffer he provides she can’t begrudge him all the time with his friends that he wants.

          What Emma wants, on the other hand…

          Well, she’s never been very good at answering that question.

          She winds up going for a walk on the beach after dinner, the setting sun lighting up the town behind her in reds and oranges and golds. Out on the water twilight is taking hold, turning the sky a deep shade of cerulean. Someone further up the beach has brought out a guitar, and curiosity has her making her way towards the familiar strains that she can’t quite place.

          She wants to make a choice. Emma fell into her relationships with both Neal and Walsh more by happenstance than anything else. They seemed like good ideas at the time but neither one was her idea. If there’s one thing she’s ever chosen for herself it was moving to New York. But at the time running away from everything David had given her and everything she’d taken from him in return seemed like the only idea there ever could be. She’s missed him, she’s finally admitted to herself this past week, but she left for a reason. Storybrooke is better off without her.

          It’s Killian on the guitar, — of course it is — and she slows down to buy herself some time to decide whether or not she should let him know she’s there. He’s sitting on some rocks under the pier with his eyes closed, playing the same notes over and over like he’s both trying to purge them from his memory and commit them there for good. Emma’s just about to turn and start heading back the other way when he starts the song over to add vocals and his voice sends goosebumps down her arms. She was so sure he hadn’t seen her, but suddenly she’s compelled to stay, like somehow he knows and is singing the song just for her.

          But then, everyone who’s ever heard Landslide thinks that it could be about them.

          “That was beautiful.” He jumps when she speaks just like every other time they’ve run into each other in town and she winces. “I’m sorry,” she says, crossing her arms over her chest even as she tries to keep the hair out of her face. “I didn’t mean to interrupt.”

          Killian shifts to face her, taking the guitar strap off and laying the instrument across his legs. “It’s fine. Thank you.”

          She should probably leave him alone, she thinks, but instead she steps closer and joins him under the pier. “You should be playing for people instead of waves. You’re good.”

          His fingers are tracing idle patterns on the body of the guitar and Emma’s eyes follow the swirling patterns as he shakes his head. “I was, once.”

          “I’ve heard a lot of average acts over the years,” she says. “Trust me, you’re still good. Fleetwood Mac, right?”

          Killian nods. “My, uh, my ex,” he explains, “She loved Stevie Nicks.”

          “She left you?” The question is out of her mouth before she can pull it back and she bites her lip to keep from prying further.

          “In a manner of speaking.” He meets her eyes finally and his shoulders drop. “She died. Car crash about eight months ago.”

          “I’m sorry,” she says, so much of what she knows about him finally clicking into place. “It’s not easy being the one left behind.”

          “Your boy’s father?”

          Emma huffs out an exhale at the thought that she could be so easy to read and flips her hair back over her shoulder. “Yeah. I mean, he didn’t die but… he’s gone.”

          It’s weird talking about Neal to someone who doesn’t already know how it ended — even Walsh only got the bare bones of the story and she’d known him for almost a year before finally giving in and telling him. So it’s strange and yet it somehow makes perfect sense, that they would jump from trying to undress each other in the backseat of her car to trading heartbreaks on the beach.

          “Listen, I wanted to apologize for the first time we, uh, met,” she says, kicking at the wet sand with the toe of her boot. “If I did anything to make you uncomfortable —”

          “Wasn’t you, love,” he cuts her off, grabbing his case from where it’s sitting behind him and carefully tucking the guitar away. “That one’s all on me.”

          Emma smiles a little, one more thing making sense, and tilts her head as she studies him. “You haven’t been with anyone since her, have you?”

          He barks out a laugh and runs a hand through his hair. “Was it that obvious?”

          “Well, y’know…”

          Killian chuckles again and she grins back, lifted by the change in mood. “Are you headed back to town?” he asks, climbing down from his perch and pulling the guitar with him.

          “Yeah, I probably should be,” she says.

          “May I walk you?”

          She raises an eyebrow at the question. “I’m a big girl, Killian. You don’t need to go out of your way.”

          “You’re staying at Granny’s right?” Emma nods and he tucks the thumb of his free hand into his pocket, gesturing with his guitar case up to the road. “I live next door. It’s hardly out of the way.”

          She watches him for a long moment, pulled between how much it feels just like that night at the bar and how it also feels very, very different, her thoughts of a meaningless summer fling quickly feeling like they’re being taken out by the tide.

          “Let me be a gentleman, love,” he says softly.

          He’s waiting for her and she so badly wants to roll her eyes at the word ‘gentleman’ but he’s being so fucking sincere that she has to take a breath.

         “Alright.”

          He hasn’t played in months, not since the crash took Milah from him, but the guitar feels as familiar to him now as it did when Liam presented it to him for his 16th birthday. Killian’s not sure what made him dig it out of the back of his closet and bring it down to the docks but it’s like an itch under his skin. He’d been watching Emma at the soccer game, wanting so badly to just go over and talk to her like an actual human being and not the fumbling sod that he apparently turns into when sober. But she hadn’t been sitting alone, had been with the sheriff of all people, and he just… never summoned the nerve. By the time he’d taken Erik home and gotten back to the flat he’d needed something. Anything that might break him out of this damned holding pattern he’s been stuck in.

          Landslide was one of Milah’s favourites and it was a standard on their old set list. He knows that she put it in his head, and when he finishes the song to find Emma standing on the beach just a few feet away he can’t help but wonder what if she sent her to him as well. He didn’t think Emma was going to accept his offer to walk her back to town — she didn’t look like she was going to and he worried he might have pried too much when he asked about her ex — but as they leave the beach walking side-by-side a sense of surety settles in his chest. Like this is right. This is what he’s supposed to be doing.

          “So, how long have you been in Storybrooke?” Emma asks as they cut through the alley next to the old cannery.

          “Since the spring,” he replies. “My brother, Liam, asked me to come and help with the shop when his wife got sick.”

          “Wow, sick sister in-law, dead girlfriend… you’re just sunshine and rainbows, aren’t you?”

          He gives her a mock incredulous look and she bumps his shoulder with hers in response. He’s not offended — if anything, he finds her playful sarcasm refreshing.

          “Alright, what about you then?” he counters. “What brings you to this lovely seaside town?”

          “I dumped my fiancé after I caught him stealing from me.”

          Killian snorts at her candour and she flashes him a smile.

          “I’ve got family in town, sort of,” she adds by way of explanation. “My son, Henry, comes for two weeks every summer. I just tagged along.”

          Two weeks, he thinks, but catches himself before disappointment can set in. She signed her son up for soccer and has taken over the icecream shop for Ingrid. She must be planning on staying longer than that this time around.

          “And where’s home when you’re not visiting?” Killian asks, choosing not to prod at this mention of a different ended relationship in favour of safer small-talk.

          A flicker of something passes over her face, but it’s quickly replaced. “Not sure yet.” She tucks her hands into the pockets of her jeans with a shrug. “Where’s home for you? When you’re not selling bait and tackle to grumpy fishermen, that is.”

          They’ve turned onto Main Street and Emma comes to a stop next to her ubiquitous yellow bug.

         Home was his mother, once. Then it was wherever Milah was. Liam is all the family he’s got left, but the town where his older brother settled down with a family of his own has always seemed like it’s missing something for Killian to consider it home. Still, it’s the best he’s got at the moment. And this moment, with her, is one he’s not willing to tarnish with his malaise.

         “Above all the bait and tackle, of course,” he says easily, nodding over to the shop.

         She rolls her eyes but smiles and Killian can’t help but turn so that he’s standing in front of her, raising an eyebrow and swaying just a little bit into her space. She’s right on the edge of the curb, the curve of her ass resting against the door that he tumbled out of not even a week ago. But he’s not thinking about how he fell apart at the sound of a passing ambulance. Not when he can be thinking about how easily they fell together instead.

          Emma’s eyes flick between his and he shuffles closer, setting his guitar down and leaning it up against the car. There’s a slight hitch in her breathing as he straightens and it keeps him from doing the honourable thing and stepping back. Killian remembers, vaguely, what it’s like to kiss her but all the drinks he’d had before and afterwards clouded his memory and this… this he wants to appreciate.

          When her tongue darts out to wet her lips he breaks, closing the last bit of distance between them. Their lips fuse on a sharp inhale and Killian crowds her up against the bug, cupping her face with his hand so he can brush his thumb against the apple of her cheek. Emma tugs him even closer and he goes eagerly, one hand landing on the car for support while the other snakes under her shirt to pull her in by the small of her back. She makes a sound in the back of her throat and her fingers are tugging on his hair and God, he thinks, why did he ever stop kissing her the last time? She tastes faintly like ketchup and he chases her lips when they break for breath, wanting more.

          “Come up for a drink with me.”

          His voice is wrecked even to his own ears and he presses his head to hers like it might keep the earth from spinning.

          “I, um,” Emma starts, her face flushed pink. It might be the prettiest colour he’s ever seen and he has a sudden, vicious regret for not having been able to see her properly when she came around his fingers. “I don’t know.”

          Killian bows his head, his breathing still heavy as he takes a step back. “Aye, of course. I shouldn’t have presumed, I—” He cuts his rambling short. He will not look the fool in front of her. Not this time, at least. “Have a good evening,” he says instead, pasting on a tight-lipped smile.

          She stops his retreat with a hand on his arm and he looks up to meet her eyes. “Maybe, maybe I could take a rain check? It’s just… I’m not sure either one of us is actually ready to…”

         Emma trails off, though her hand gesture completes the sentence well enough. Killian understands, of course. His life is still mostly a mess, and falling into bed with someone is only ever uncomplicated in theory. She’s got her own troubles, plus her boy to think about...

          “It’s not a problem, love,” he says, managing to make his smile a little more genuine this time. “A rain check it is.”

          Emma gives him a pleased little smile, and he gives in to the urge to tuck away a stray piece of hair, letting his fingers trail down the shell of her ear before forcing himself to take another step back and turn to leave.

          “Hey, Jones?” she calls out as he’s about halfway to the shop. Killian turns to look back at her and she shifts on her feet a little before raising a hand in a half sort-of wave. “Don’t be a stranger, okay?”

          “I wouldn’t dream of it.”

          After the week he’s had, he doesn’t think he could not see her if he tried.

[steelmistsrp]

Congratulations && welcome, Royan !!  You have been accepted for the role of The Informant: Axel Ladrian.  Please be sure to make a separate blog for your character &&send it into the main within 48 hours !!  Once that is submitted we will invite you to join the OOC blog && an option to join our skype chat if you should so choose !! Any triggers you (and other applicants) have submitted have been added to our trigger list.  Please be sure to read our Welcome Checklist as you begin to get started.  The Follow List && OOC page will also be updated for you once your blog has been submitted.  Thanks again for you application && we look forward to writing with you !!

Royan, you’re a rockstar.  Axel is the perfect trash child.  High quality trash, even. Recycling if you will.  While all of us are already familiar with your writing style && what you’re capable of, you’ve once again blown us away.  Even though you’re not that familiar with the verse you’ve managed to fit him into the world perfect.  We can’t wait to see what fun or horrible shenanigans this little guy gets up to, and we’re thrilled to have you join the game.  Thanks && Welcome !!

OUT OF CHARACTER INFORMATION

Name: Royan Age: 21 Pronouns: She/Her Timezone: CST Activity Level: 6-7

IN CHARACTER INFORMATION

Skeleton Name: The Informant Character’s Full Name: Axel Thierry Ladrian

Axel - It means “My Father Is Peace” and I got a kick out of it because farthest thing from the truth. His father wasn’t peace, his father was stress and despair and a death passed over by everyone that wasn’t his immediate family. Thierry - So, in honesty, I just love the name Thierry but I also googled what it meant and it means “Ruler Of The People” and it’s just so not the Informant that it had me cackling. He is the furthest thing from the Ruler of the People. Maybe he could be more prominent in the trash people but def not anyone else lol.

Faceclaim: Michael B Jordan Gender and Pronouns: He/Him Sexuality: Bi til they Die and probably after that too tbh Age and DOB: 24: Born in 527, on a particularly cold night on the 13th of Spokial Education Level:  While he would have liked to just drop out of school entirely so he could help his father work, he was forced to go to Primary and Secondary school. When he wasn’t at school, he was out getting into trouble or trying to steal to suport his family. He knew he wasn’t going to pursue higher education further after Secondary school - the streets teach him more than a classroom ever could.

Biography:  

The phrase “Nobody gets justice. People only get good luck or bad luck” has been a bitter thought in Axel’s head for his entire life for there’s never been any justice for him or his family. When he was young, Axel didn’t quite understand why his family was struggling to make ends meet when the others with the Ladrian name lived a life of luxuary. After all, isn’t the last name Ladrian synonymous with industrial success? It wasn’t until he was older than while having certain names in this city granted power, having the last name Ladrian was as useful as metalfire without the needle.

He grew up with the memory of his father, Elard, being gone when he woke and barely coming home in time to read to him in bed. He treasured those few, rare moments with his father though, waiting patiently for him to sit by his bed with a book in his hand, no matter how many times his mother had told him to sleep. And, his father never disappointed in coming in to read to him. It didn’t matter how late it was or how early Elard had to get up, he coaxed his son into sleep with tales of old. The older Axel got, the bitterer he became but his father refused to let Axel even so much as look to the factories for a job, insisting that he should focus on his studies and try and aim to be something better.

When there was an accident at the factory, and he caught wind of his father’s death, Axel and his family was not only devastated but also scared. They didn’t know what to do and despite trying to get compensation for their father’s death, they were only laughed at by the richer Ladrians. Needless to say, it infuriated Axel and that paired with the memories of his father working hismelf to the bone made him swear to never work in a factory. He couldn’t afford to leave his family behind so he had to find another way to make money. One night out, after drinking himself silly, he ended up getting into a fight with someone on behalf on a woman. In truth, he had just needed someone to take his rage out but the woman had seen it as a show of bravery and gall so she got him in contact with the Burning Word as a reward.

Once it was explained to him how much he could make off the drug trade, it was an easy choice. Using his luck-infused chromimum metalmind, he was a natural at selling the metalfire, selling the drugs without a care to the morality of it. He never touched his own product, seeing using as a waste when he could be making money off of it. Life got easier and some of the lines on his mother’s face lessened. He was able to provide for his family in a way his father never could have even if Elard might have looked down upon the trade. Better dealing than dead though, right?

As his proficiency on dealing grew, so did his ability as a Spinner - which made his bust even bitterer. He should have known not to go out that day while actively storing but he had been given a huge opportunity to make more than a few Doxins. So, he risked his entire operation and when the constable turned it on him, he tried to fight and run. Naturally, it didn’t work out for him but they could add non-compliance to his rap sheet. He sat in that jail cell for 24 hours, seething in silence as everything burned down around him. He couldn’t call anyone for help, knowing full well that he’d be left to rot. His employers might have given him a chance but he had squandered it and was going to be left with the ruins.

When he sat across the Paragon, eyes burning with distaste, he had been surprised by her offer to let him loose if he worked for her. Most denied the deal, too afraid to even cross the Burning Word but Axel had always toed the gap of danger and he’d easily breach the gap if it meant his family’s survival. He had accepted her deal and was released almost instantly, his arrest being erased from any files. He walked home that day, chin up, jaw tense, fists clenched and feeling more like a caged animal than ever. And like a rabid, newly released animal, he made sure to pick a fight with someone bigger, taking his frustration out with every punch he threw.

Living a double life now with not a word to anyone, Axel is more dedicated to storing luck and fortune than ever. He takes his metalmind with him everywhere, considering it the only thing keeping him from ending up dead in the water.

Personality: 

A product of the crime and streets of Octant 4, Axel is a fighter through and through. In his work, he’s gathered a gang of loyal friends who assist him in the selling of his wares, always diligent in turning the profits back in to the Corrupter. Despite his antagonistic nature, he’s sure to never step on the feet of anyone who could truly harm his whole operation. Strong and almost feral, he lives a life of debauchery and danger but he makes sure to never take it home with him, trying to give his family a false sense of security. He’s nothing if not resourceful, finding a way to use the city, people and luck to his goals. His flaws lie in the bitterness that grows in his heart, leaving him cold and resentful to all those with a better life. Axel holds no resemblances to the affluent Ladrians, almost preying on his unsuspecting cousins when they come wandering the streets. He might follow the Pathism religion but he only believes in luck and fortune, worshipping it as much as he can. If there’s ever a situation now that jeopardizes his spinning, he’ll make sure to escape the situation quickly before it lands him in even more trouble.

Astrology: Aries Hogwarts House: Gryffindor Element: Fire Westerosi House: House Baratheon Alignment: Chaotic Neutral

Extra Content (OPTIONAL): https://www.pinterest.com/reginleit/ch-axel-ladrian/