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thebiggerbear · 8 months

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Follow Me Into the Dark - One - Never Thought I'd See You Again

Summary: The last person you expected shows up on one of the worst days of your life. Why on earth is Dean Winchester here and why is he asking you about your connections to the deceased?

A/N: Here we are. Part 1. This was what I originally intended for the "Sleep. I"ll keep you safe" prompt response but I ended up changing it because this felt too long to simply be a prompt response or even a one shot and I couldn't bear to cut it down to try to make it fit. It felt like the more it took form as I wrote, the more it deserved a proper fleshing out. So, alas, a short story. It's just an idea that I really had to explore. Not gonna lie, this might get a little dark. Hope this is alright.

This would be taking place during season 15.

All unbeta'd so all mistakes are mine.

Warnings: implied familicide; implied deaths of children; angst; heartbreak; grief; language (I guess?)

Word Count: 4814

Series Masterlist

Taglist: @avada-kedavra-bitch-187; @rieleatiel

Series Taglist: @globetrotter28; @roseblue373

Dean Taglist: @deans-spinster-witch; @birdiellie; @heartlessdelusions

SPN Taglist: @just-levyy

You sat in the pristine living room and stared at the coffee table as people milled around you. You could hear the hushed whispers of mourning for them, pity for you, and worst of all, judgment and condemnation of him. If you could, you’d throw each and every one of them out of this house right now. But it wouldn’t change the fact that they were gone. Every single one of them…gone.

You glanced up and caught sight of a framed picture of your niece holding onto her baby brother, smiling wide for the camera. You would never get to hold either of them again, chase Thea around the house and hear her squeals of laughter, tickle Tanner’s belly to hear those happy gurgles that only a baby could make — never again. A tear slipped from your eye that you quickly wiped away.

You were just about to get up and head into the kitchen to try to escape the harpy on your right, loudly whispering about how she’d always known something was off, when two tall men wearing suits entered your vision. Your eyes widened when you recognized one of them, and his expression mirrored your shocked one.

“Dean?” You asked in disbelief. You felt as if you had been sucker punched. Of course, on the absolute worst day of your life, he would show back up. The universe clearly had it in for you and wanted to destroy whatever little piece of you that was left. It had already brought you to your knees but that wasn’t enough. As if you weren’t already hollow inside…it wanted to finish the job.

The taller man to Dean’s left glanced back and forth between you. “Uh, do you two know each other?”

Dean looked at a loss for words for a moment but managed to answer with “You might say that.”

Seeing your face, Dean immediately looked apologetic. No, you couldn’t do this. Not today of all days. Not here, not now. “Right,” you muttered before making a hasty retreat to the kitchen as you’d planned to do prior to their arrival. You didn’t even bother looking back. Hopefully, Dean and his friend would just leave.

You busied yourself with doing the dishes; you figured you’d get a head start on them now. A kindly neighbor had offered to do them but you shook your head and took over, not saying a word. Thankfully, whoever had been in the room had vacated it, giving you your space. You were grateful because you weren’t sure if you could take one more “I’m so sorry, dear” or “Did you have any idea?” You threw yourself into the mundane chore, opting not to use the dishwasher next to you. You needed the distraction, to focus on something other than how you were broken inside. You did your best not to cry when you came across the coffee cup your sister-in-law had helped Thea to make for Father’s Day this year. It was similar to the “Best Aunt Ever” one they’d sent you for your birthday.

Several dishes later, you heard a quiet throat clearing behind you but you refused to turn around to look or stop what you were doing. You knew who it was; you’d practically felt him walk into the room.

“Listen, Y/N, I’m sorry if—”

“Why are you here?”

That question seemed to throw him off guard. Good. “I wanted to say I’m—”

“No,” You cut him off before he could finish saying the two words you now hated with a passion. God knows he’d said it enough to you before he’d left you in the dust back in Sedona. “Why are you here?”

“We— I mean, my brother and I, we were in town and—”

You spun around, your eyes wide. “That was Sam?”

He gave you a nervous yet proud smile. “Uh, yeah. That’s Sammy.”

After a moment, you nodded and went back to doing the dishes. Out of the corner of your eye, you noticed that Dean had moved closer, looking unsure and slightly fidgeting.

“So you… You knew the family?”

You stopped for a moment, thinking maybe you didn’t want to have this conversation that he seemed intent on having. You’d closed the book on him years ago and there was no reason to rehash any of it. It was the same old story anyway: girl meets boy; girl has incredible sex with boy; girl spends a few weeks holed up with boy; girl falls hard for boy and makes the mistake of telling him; boy immediately breaks her heart by telling her he doesn’t feel the same and then leaves girl behind to deal with the fallout of a shattered heart alone. Definitely nothing to rehash there. “You never answered my question. Why are you here?”

“Sam and I were in town and we just happened to see an article online about what happened.”

You huffed out a snort as you slipped another wet dish into the drying rack. “Article online about what happened…”

“I meant that we—”

The anger that had been simmering all day suddenly started coming to the surface as you replayed his words over and over in your head. “Is that what you and Sam do? Look around for funerals to crash and poke around because you and your brother have some morbid curiosity you need to satisfy? To set up your next true crime podcast or YouTube channel? What?”

“What? Podcast? No. That’s not what I—”

“You know what, Dean, I don’t even care. Just take your brother and get out. I have enough to deal with today without you screwing up my life yet again.” How dare he? He was definitely not the man you remembered. Or maybe he was; maybe he was the man who had used you and left you behind without once looking back.

He laid a gentle hand on your shoulder but that was it. “Y/N, I didn’t mean—”

You shirked his hand off. “Just go,” you yelled, feeling a sudden rush of fury charge through you. “That’s what you’re good at! Just leave, Dean, and don’t look back!” At the same time, the glass in your grip suddenly shattered, making you gasp as red rivulets began to run down your palm.

Dean was suddenly there with a dish towel, gently cradling your hand as he slowly pulled a small shard of glass out, making you hiss in pain. He then ran your hand under the water, eliciting another pained hiss, before wrapping the towel tightly around your hand. “There a first aid kit here somewhere?”

“In the bathroom, I think.”

Dean glanced over to where you gestured and nodded. “Alright, hold this tight and take a seat. I’ll be right back.” You did as he instructed, quietly thinking over what just happened. Dean was incredibly focused and on it, no hesitation, but that wasn’t what gave you pause. Where did that spike of anger come from? And more disturbingly, why did you have the strongest urge to throw that glass at him before it actually broke in your hand? You weren’t a violent person by any means; you never put your hands on another person, never had the urge to. Sure, you’d imagined slapping a guy that deserved it when he got too handsy while being an arrogant jerk one time but you never actually felt the burning impulse that you felt just before. You glanced over at the photo mug in the drying rack and tears sprang to your eyes as you felt your heart break yet again (how was there anything left to break at this point?) when you realized maybe you actually were that type of person after all. The very worst sort of person that had some darkness or bad inside them that was lying dormant waiting for the right victim to come along so you could unleash it on them.

You tried to shake the hopeless thoughts from your head. You knew that was your shock, grief, and misery speaking. Instead, you changed the lens to a logical one and began to explain away what had happened. Perhaps it had been Dean’s words or his very appearance. Or it could be what had happened and why you were here today. Or maybe it was even a combination of everything. The glass you had broken hadn’t been light, sure, but perhaps there had been a crack in it before that you hadn’t noticed. And it absolutely made sense that you were lashing out at Dean. He had shown up out of nowhere and began asking questions because of an article he’d read online, not even one of them being a simple ‘how are you?’. He hadn’t seen you in years and while he might not have known exactly who you were in relation to this situation, you were here for a funeral and you were washing dishes, everyone was trying to give you their condolences and watching you with pity — didn’t that account for something in his mind?

You didn’t have much more time to think on it when Dean suddenly reappeared with the first aid kit in hand. He laid it down on the table in front of you and slipped his jacket off, throwing it over the back of an empty chair. He quickly rolled up his shirt sleeves and took the seat next to you, gently taking your hand and carefully unfurling your fingers. “Alright, let’s see what we’ve got.”

You watched as he studied the slice in your palm. “Not too deep,” he approved. He then began checking your skin for any other glass fragments or cuts. When he determined you were good, he began to soak a cotton ball with peroxide before turning a wide smile on you. “Did you hear the one about the priest and the cop?”

Your brows furrowed. He was now trying to make jokes? Seriously? Not to mention, no, you’d never heard of that one nor did you want to. “The priest and the—” You let out a loud hiss and you dug your teeth into your bottom lip. “Fuck,” you painfully whispered.

You moved your gaze from the cotton ball being dabbed against your broken skin to Dean who was watching you intently. He gave you an apologetic smile. “Sorry,” he murmured.

“It’s fine,” you forced out as he continued to clean you up.

“So you didn’t tell me how you knew the family.” It was obvious he was trying to distract you from the painful stings of the ointment he was using but it also set your teeth on edge that he was still trying to get answers out of you that he wasn’t entitled to.

When you didn’t respond, he glanced up at you expectantly.

Fine. Whatever. Let him judge along with all the others. I don’t care. It’s not like he matters to me anymore. “He was my brother,” you whispered.

Sure enough, his green eyes opened wide in surprise. “He was your brother?”

You gave a reluctant nod, choosing to glance around the room rather than look at him.

“So the kids, they were…”

Your vision blurred slightly and you were unable to speak due to the lump that had been in your throat all day, making it hard to swallow. You bit the inside of your cheek to keep from crying. You were resolved that you would not cry in front of anyone today, and you definitely would not cry in front of Dean Winchester. He’d seen enough of your tears back in Arizona.

You felt the movements on your hand cease altogether and you turned back to see the pity you’d been getting all day staring back at you. You hated it. “I’m so sorry.”

You nodded as if on autopilot and dropped your gaze back to your hand, waiting for him to finish so you could get out of here, away from him, away from the pity and the judgment that was sure to follow. He resumed the bandaging a moment later and you both spent the rest of the time in silence.

His brother’s appearance broke it. “Everything okay in here?”

Dean glanced up at you before looking at Sam. “Uh, yeah. Just a little accident but she’s good as new.” You saw him wince slightly at the words though he tried to hide it. That ticked your irritation a little higher though you had no idea why.

“May I?” Sam asked you, pulling out one of the empty chairs. At your subtle nod, he took a seat. You knew you should introduce yourself, finally officially meet the younger brother you’d heard so much about years ago, but you didn’t have it in you. You also weren’t surprised when Dean didn’t move to introduce you or that it was painfully obvious that he had never told Sam about you which just made you feel worse. It didn’t hurt, not in the way it would have back then, but it was like someone scratched a nail lightly along a long healed scar you had which would make you flinch slightly, hoping the nail would go away and forever leave the injury site untouched. Like a crater in the earth from a small asteroid; best to just leave it be and let nature take its course.

You flexed your hand as Dean put the dressings back into the kit.

“I’m sorry for your loss,” Sam offered.

Feeling that autopilot mode come back into play, you mumbled, “Thank you.”

“I can’t imagine how tough this has been on you and your family.” You nearly snorted; what family? Perhaps they hadn’t noticed but you were it. “But if you wouldn’t mind, I’d like to ask you a couple of questions about Scott and Leah.”

You briefly closed your eyes in pain at hearing their names, but not before you saw Dean’s head snap up to give Sam a look. “Not now.” He spoke in a tone that brooked no argument.

Sam’s brows furrowed in confusion and he tilted his head questioningly, but remained silent.

You decided you’d had more than enough and you slowly got to your feet. Dean stood up as well, his hands reaching out to you as if to steady you, hanging in the air and unsure. You simply stared at him until he lowered his arms and compulsively swallowed. You spared a glance over at Sam and then turned to leave.

“Y/N.”

You stopped in your tracks but didn’t turn around.

“Is there anything we can do? Anything you need?” Dean softly asked.

Anything they could do…anything you needed… You needed your family back, you needed to turn back the hands of time and get here sooner when Leah had called you out of the blue last week and begged you to come talk to Scott, saying he wasn’t acting like himself and she was worried. But since that didn’t appear to be an option, you simply shook your head and quietly answered, “Thank you for coming.” You then continued your trek out of the room, past the people who continued to offer you empty condolences or mutter statements like “They seemed like such a happy family”, and headed up the stairs, not caring in the least that you had a house full of people expecting you to be present so they could offer meaningless sympathies to someone. You ran to the bathroom and shut yourself inside it, sinking down behind the door and burying your face into your arms, hiding until everyone left and you could be alone again. You may have let out a few tears, a few quiet sobs, but no one would ever know.

“Dean, we can’t just leave her,” Sam tried to reason with his brother as they passed the crowd slowly making their way out of the home and headed towards the Impala. “We don’t even know what we’re dealing with yet.”

Dean pulled his keys out of his pocket, opening the back door of Baby to toss his jacket into. After you’d gone upstairs, he’d finished the dishes so you wouldn’t have to. He wouldn’t admit it to Sam but seeing the glass sticking out of your skin, you bleeding — it bothered him tremendously. It might have been a simple cut that had been easily patched up but it was you. It didn’t sit right with him just like this whole case hadn’t from the get go.

He certainly hadn’t been expecting to see you after all of this time, while he was on a case of all things. He had hoped you were off living your life somewhere, happy as could be, in love, maybe have a kid or two — whatever you’d wanted. He had wanted you to have a normal life, a life untainted by the things that go bump in the night, something he would never get to experience himself. That was why he’d done the impossible and left you back in Sedona all those years ago. Granted, he’d been young and untethered and idiotic but those weeks he spent with you, those he would never forget. You were gorgeous, funny as hell, great in bed, you had a killer smile, and oh did you have one hell of a kind heart. You were a good girl with a wild streak who for some reason picked him though you could have had any number of guys knocking at your door. How could he not have fallen head over heels for you? And when you told him you loved him, being the first to say it between you, he’d felt something he never had before. When he was sixteen, he thought he knew what love was but boy had he been wrong.

Dean had wanted to stay with you back then, to hunker down and see where things went between you. After all, what would it hurt to put down roots for a little bit and not have to travel from motel room to motel room? To not have to sleep in the Impala for once? Besides, if Sam got to go to college and live his life, why couldn’t Dean do the same for a little while? It’s not like he would be quitting hunting or abandoning his dad to it alone, so why not? He may have only been 23 but he wanted to experience something he had always dreamed about but was told he would never have, and he wanted to experience it with you. Hell, you didn’t even need to stay in Sedona; you could settle down in Phoenix or Mesa or Tucson — or even travel to a different state. As long as he had you, he didn’t care where the two of you settled.

But of course, that had only been a dream, a momentary fantasy that felt real enough to almost touch before it was snatched out of his reach. John had called and demanded that he haul ass to Las Cruces to help him on a werewolf hunt, reminding him that he had an obligation to the family. Especially now that they were one man down thanks to Sammy’s big college adventure. Dean had tried to tell his father about you and the plan you both came up with, he really did, but John wouldn’t hear of it. The older man insisted it was infatuation, not the real thing, that he was too young to think about settling down, not to mention he was a hunter. And his dad scoffed when Dean mentioned that the way he felt about you reminded him of the stories John used to tell him and Sam about their parents meeting when they were young. He even proudly mentioned that you knew the words to every one of his favorite Led Zeppelin songs; he’d checked. He just knew John would love you if he’d be willing to meet you.

John then hit him with the truth that Dean had kept buried deep down and refused to acknowledge. If he stayed with you, you would never be safe. Even if he left hunting to be with you, you’d forever have a target on your back from every nasty evil thing he’d ever hunted. Just look at what happened to his Mary after she’d left hunting for a normal life. It followed her right up to Sammy’s nursery that night back in 1983 and killed her in front of his eyes. Dean’s own eyes had misted up as John’s words registered and from the silence, John knew he had been heard.

“Do what you have to do, son. I’ll see you in the morning.” The line clicked and Dean stared at the phone, a tear slipping down his cheek.

Needless to say, Dean had broken it off with you that very day, determined to ignore your tears and heartbroken pleas, knowing he was doing the right thing by you. He said what he knew you needed to hear, though it cut him up inside to say it.

“I love you, Dean. Please,” you’d tearfully begged him. “Don’t leave.”

“I have to. I didn’t realize this was getting serious. I mean, we holed up together for a few weeks, we had some great sex, we had some laughs, some drinks, and a good time together, but that’s all it was ever going to be. You had to know that going into this, when you took me home from the bar that night. I’m pretty sure I even told you that I was only looking for a fun time while I was waiting for my next job. No strings attached because I’m just rolling through, remember?”

As he watched the heartbreak play upon your face, he cowardly looked away as he rolled up his spare pairs of jeans and threw them into his duffel. If he looked at you, you’d see just how much you meant to him and just how much this was hurting him to have to do this to both of you.

“I’m 23 for Christ’s sake. I’m not looking to settle down, move in with a girlfriend, or get married and start cranking out kids. I want to live my life before I even start thinking about any of that crap.”

“But you said that you wanted to find a place together. You said you wanted to be with me. You said—” You whispered brokenly.

Dean’s jaw hardened and he turned away from you under the guise of grabbing his t-shirts and Henleys from the dresser drawer, shutting his eyes tightly. “It was just all talk. You know, us talking about what we’d do if our lives were different, what we’d want, like in a fantasy future. That kind of thing. I never actually meant any of it.” He heard the tiny gasp behind him and his fingers clenched around the material in his hands. Just get it done already. You’ve got work to do. The thought had been in John’s voice but Dean knew the thought was his own. He had to do this. He didn’t want to hurt you but he didn’t have any other choice. He couldn’t tell you why he had to leave and why he had to go without you. He couldn’t tell you that he was breaking your heart to keep you safe. He couldn’t admit that he was breaking his own so you could go and live a normal life, something he would never get to experience himself, so you could be happy after you forgot about him and dismissed him as a fun and wild lay that one time when you were young. That thought cut deeply into his chest and his resolve strengthened. No more drawing this out. You needed to let him go and move on; it was the only way to keep what he hunted in the shadows from ever touching you.

“I didn’t think you did, either,” he forced out. Though he heard the beginning of a sob behind him in response, he made himself open his eyes and turned around to pack the rest of his stuff. He never allowed himself to look over at you to see the pain he’d inflicted on you; he heard it well enough.

Even when he threw his bags in the backseat of Baby and slammed the door shut, he refused to meet your wet gaze. He kept his hands glued to his sides, clenched in fists, because they itched to pull you into his arms for one last hug, for one last kiss to your head, but he wouldn’t allow himself to. He didn’t deserve it. “Take care of yourself, Y/N.” Without waiting for your response, he got into the Impala and started her up, revving the engine before pulling away from you for good.

He would never forget the devastated look on your face in his side view mirror as he drove away from you, how you’d hugged yourself and brokenly turned to go back into the motel room the two of you had shared. It wasn’t any consolation but he was glad he’d handled the bill earlier and he’d even charged another week to one of the cards he had so this way you wouldn’t have to worry about a thing. You could take a little time to figure out where to go from there. Sure, if his dad knew, he’d tear him a new one, but he never intended on telling John or anyone about you. You’d be better protected that way. No demon or witch could mine that information. And since he himself didn’t know where you’d go, they wouldn’t be able to get it out of him either. Not to mention, he told himself over and over that he didn’t love you until he began to believe it. That you two wouldn’t have worked out and you had just about run your course before John had called him. Who was to say that you two would have even been able to settle on an apartment or house to move into together? You barely knew each other. Plus, you were both young and you would change as you got older, as people do, and your dreams, desires, and needs would change. Either hunting would have taken a toll on the relationship or you would have grown apart. So, though it had been harsh, he had actually done you both a favor. He spared you both heartache later on by causing you a little at that moment. Dean was very good about compartmentalizing things when it suited him. You were safe and that was all that mattered. So yes, he made himself forget about you and how he felt about you, and he didn’t look back. That look of yours, though, that destroyed and heartbroken look…it had haunted him for months. But he told himself that if that was the price of protecting you, he’d gladly pay it. With enough alcohol, hunts, and faceless women, the memory of the look all but faded into the distance of the past.

Eventually, time passed and then of course, Cassie had come along. He’d learned from what had happened with you and he’d been up front with Cassie about who he really was and that didn’t end well. Not to mention his time with Lisa and Ben. But over this period of time, he had also finally convinced himself that you had probably gotten over him and found somebody else who could give you the life he never could, the life you deserved. He wanted that for you and yet it seemed that no matter how hard he’d tried to give it to you in his own way all those years ago, the supernatural and all the pain and devastation it brought seemed to have found you anyway.

“We’re not leaving her,” Dean assured his brother after breaking himself out of his reverie. Ignoring Sam’s confused expression at Dean opening the driver side door, he glanced up towards the upper level of the house, knowing you were hiding away somewhere beyond those walls. An elderly neighbor had assured him that she and her husband would stay in the home for the next hour or so in case you needed anything.

He slipped into the driver seat, followed by Sam getting in on the passenger side, and started Baby up. He put the car into drive and pulled away from the curb, intent on getting to the motel to change and ready himself for the conversation he knew he needed to have with you now. Truthfully, it was a conversation he should have had with you a long time ago. It was time to give you the talk. He’d left you alone back in that motel room all of those years ago; he wasn’t about to make the same mistake twice.

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livingfandomly · 1 year

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Currently about to finish S9 in SPN. Now, the thing is, I’ve always been very much concerned about why people shipped Dean and Cas together (not even gonna talk about shipping Sam and Dean coz just NO) and right now I’m having a very hard time denying that y’all may be right….

I’ve always seen Dean as an extremely hetero character, I mean that man has needed sex more than oxygen for a lot of the seasons HOWEVER.. one, that sex has simmered down. And two, his relationship with Cas is obviously different from Sam’s relationship with Cas. Sam and Cas feel like brothers/friends who care about each other to the point that they’d die for one another. Cas and Dean????? They do NOT feel like brothers. Best friends, maybe. But there’s just an underlying current that makes their relation so much… more??

There’s also these little niblets of moments where the interactions between them move so far beyond simple friendship and into love. I mean, the fact that when Naomi was training/brainwashing Cas she made him kill ONLY Dean. Literally hundreds of times. And yet, when it came down to it he couldn’t do it. And Dean was literally just like “I’m not fighting you. Kill me if that’s what it’s gotta be”. Very normal behaviour.

Plus, right now Cas called Sam and Dean to talk about angels getting the choice to join Metatron or die and called them to help track Gadreel. Fully normal conversation going on between Cas and Sam until Dean said something and Cas’s whole face relaxes, he forgets his conversation with Sam and literally just sighs out “hi Dean” AND AND Dean looks at Sam and Sam gives Dean a whole side eye and Dean goes “hi Cas” right in the middle of a fucking conversation both these sighing idiots just felt like they HAD TO acknowledge each other????????

Plus. When Cas found out about Dean’s mark he was so fucking concerned. Boy looked like he wanted to cry??

Anyway…. I don’t know if the writers started playing into this just because the fandom clubbed the two together or because it was always there and I was blind. But I do find myself wishing that if the writers were playing into the whole Destiel thing, that they actually went for it. Because Misha and Jensen’s chemistry is insane.

(Side note: I really shouldn’t but I love Crowley too now. Love how Dean just adopts every misfit/outsider irrespective of age or gender.)

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via-l0ve · 1 year

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piggy backing off of the second to last anon,- how would the guys react in the acting au where reader died in supernatural verse but their actor visits set so they see them how would they react?

“it’s you.” (SPN pref!)🩷

a/n: this is so sad omg. i loved writing this. i didn’t do preferences but more of a little blurb for each boy <3 (not crowley i’m sorry x7)

warnings: angst, mentions of death

Dean:

when he sees you, his world stops spinning. He knows it’s you. your hair, your eyes, your lips. the same ones he remembered kissing so many times. it’s you, and dean knows it. but it can’t be. how could you be back.

he’s so zoned out that he dosent realize you’re now standing right in front of him.

“hey.” you smile

and god, that smile. the one he never got to see again - it was almost enough for him to break down right then and there. but he had to talk to you.

“h-hey.” he said, his voice barely audible.

“you okay?” you asked him, looking into his eyes and seeing the anxiety and distress.

he was quiet for a moment.

“uh… weird day.” he said shakily.

you frowned and moved closer, embracing him.

your scent. your body. your face tucked into his shoulder. he got to hold you again. he got to see you. it’s you. he can’t hold back the tears. soft sobs come from his mouth as he holds you against him.

“i’m sorry.” he whispered.

“hey it’s okay. don’t apologize. it’s okay to cry.” you whisper back, rubbing his arms.

but that’s not why he was apologizing. he was sorry he let you down. he was so so so sorry that it was you and not him that had to go.

he shook, his grip tightening on your clothes.

“i miss you.” he uttered.

“aw. you do?”

“so much.”

but then you’re called to set, to observe a scene. and he has to let you go for the second time. he has to say goodbye.

—

Sam:

sam dosent move a muscle when he sees you. he just looks. admires. he sees you laughing with one of the directors and he knows it’s you.

He walks the other way. even though he knows how badly he wants to talk to you, hear you, feel you again, it would just hurt him more. he watches you from a distance, smiling when you smile.

you’re full of life again. the same shine in your eyes, the same excitement in your voice… the same y/n. but he knows it’s not you. he knows he can never have you.

Before you leave set for the night, Sam calls you over.

“hey… can i talk to you?” he asks you, choking back tears.

“yeah of course! what’s up?” the same smile he always loved.

“i just… i miss you.” he whispers.

you give him a look.

“miss me?” you ask with a smile. “you see me every day.”

if only, he thought.

“yeah, i know. it uh… it just feels more than that.” he said, eyes studying your face.

he pulls you into a hug.

“i’ve just been having a hard time.” and it wasn’t a lie. losing you in his world was life altering. and now, seeing you but not.. you, just made all the pain come back.

“i’m sorry jared.” a sting of pain goes through him. he couldn’t even hear you say ‘Sammy’ for a last time.

“i’m here for you. always will be.” another sting of pain rushes through him, because you won’t be. as soon as he goes back, he’ll have to learn to live without you again.

you pull away, smiling.

“i’m gonna go home. i’m exhausted. text me if ya need me.” you smiled, letting go of him and walking out.

he just watches, silent tears falling again.

—

Castiel:

Castiel goes into shock. why would the angels bring you back? which angel did it? it wasn’t him.. he couldn’t have even if he had the chance.

he watches you from a distance. is this a dream? where was he? how are you back?

he watches you talk to another woman with curious eyes. he can feel the pang in his heart overflow and he knows he wants to talk to you. but if he does.. will this be all a dream? will he awake from this obvious hallucination?

he walks over to you, slowly and timidly.

you look at him and he finds himself looking at your lips. the same smile lines he remembered, the same soft freckles that were only visible if you looked close.

it was you.

he walked faster, engulfing your body in a hug. neither of you spoke as he felt your body in his arms again.

“you okay?” your voice breaks him out of his trance.

“yes..yes i’m fine.” he says, pulling away and studying your face again. his hand reached up and cupped your cheeks in both of his warm palms.

you put your hands over his.

he feels the familiar feeling of you again. god.. he couldn’t let you go.

“are you sure?” you ask him softly.

he nods.

“are… are you okay?” he asks you, choking down some tears.

“yeah. i’m okay.” you smile.

even though he knows it’s not you, it fills him with a sense of peace. you, in this universe at least, are okay.

“i…i am missing you. at home.” he whispers again.

and even though you have no clue what he’s talking about, you hug him again, rubbing his back as he lets the tears fall.

he has to start from square one all over again. leaving you. getting over it.

#love u mwah #thank you sm for this request #dean winchester #dean winchester x reader #sam winchester #sam winchester x reader #castiel #castiel x reader #i’m crying wtf #this was so sad to write #i hope you like this #i liekd it

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cheynovak · 7 months

Text

Crush Part 3

Dean Winchester x Reader (Y/N) & Sam Winchester (platonic)

Warnings: Fluff, sexual tension, implied smut, alcohol, trauma, nothing too extreme,

This story might not follow the SPN timeline.

Side note: English isn’t my first language.

Words: 4458

Short recap of part 2:

Y/N is a high school crush/friend of Sam, when they were 16 y/o they attended the same school for a while. Sam spends his entire time hanging out with her, trying to ask her to prom, only one problem, Y/N likes Dean. Now years later Dean gets out of hell and decided he wanted Y/N in his life, but desperately trying to hold her away from hunting.

But how long will that work out?

Please check out my masterlist for more stories.

--------

Jump forward in time.

Y/N and Dean are an item for about a year now. Since the brothers were out hunting a lot of the time it still felt pretty new to both of them. Still learning about each other when they were together. Often feeling it was a long-distance relationship, but they were determent to make it work.

Y/N felt the bed moving beside her. She turned around opening one eye slightly. “What time is it?” she asked while she saw Dean sitting on the bed, taking of his pants before crawling in bed with her. “Too early to get up yet.” He said wrapping his arm around her. “Go back to sleep sweetheart.” He whispered while giving her a small peck on her temple.

Y/N knew how much Dean needed their quality time together after a hunt. So, she just nested her face against him, listening to his breath getting heavier until he fell asleep. She stayed a little longer enjoying the embrace of her boyfriend before getting up.

She made a routine of getting up before Bobby and making sure he had some decent breakfast to start the day. She would clean a little but wouldn’t make the mistake of touching his books and replacing them. Only this morning she had to be move quieter than usual, since Sam was sleeping on the couch.

Bobby had already cleaned out the guest bedroom for Y/N, because he thought a woman shouldn’t sleep on a couch. But for the boys he was a little tougher. It was indeed pretty early, so instead of starting to make a noise with pots and pans and probably waking up her best friend, Y/N decided to go to the store. For a moment she was tempted to take baby with her, but she didn’t want to give Dean a nervous breakdown if he sees she is gone, so she took bobby’s old car instead. Knowing he wouldn’t mind (as much).

She walked outside: “Morning Baby, sorry, other time beautiful.” she was apologising to the car for not driving it. Like Dean would even let her.

By the time Y/N rolled into town the stores just opened. She liked shopping this early, part from a few school kids there was no rush. As Y/N strolled through the store she heard two teenagers, not older than 15 years, talk. “Oh my god! You are such a Sam girl! Don’t you realise he is a nerd?” - “Maybe but he is sooo cute and tall. I like a smart man with a troubled past.” Ha, Y/N though, looks like all Sam’s in this town are all tall, cute, smart and troubled.

“Let me guess you are a Dean girl?” - “Yep! Strong older more experience. With monsters and girls.” Both girls started to giggle. Y/N stopped walking being flabbergasted, monsters? Girls? “Hey, eh hi girls?” The blond tall girl and short brunet turned around. “I just overheard you guys talking, about monster... and boys?” She couldn’t believe her saying this. “Yeah! We are reading a novel.” The blond girl answered, “Supernatural”

“It’s about these two brothers who fight monsters.” - “Really? Can I see it.” They handed her their copies. “Unbelievable.” Y/N mumbled while reading a paragraph. “Incredible isn’t it.” The brunet said. “Where did you buy this?” Y/N asked while handing their book back. “At the bookstore a crossed from here, this is the third book.” - “Ok, thanks.”

Y/N finished her groceries and practically ran to the bookstore. She asked for the “supernatural series.” and bought all of them immediately. By the time she got home all three men were awake. “What took you so long?” Dean asked while taking the bags out of her hands. “I eh, went to the bookstore.” - “What, has Bobby not enough reading material?” Sam joked.

“No, it’s not that, I was at the store and heard two kids talk about monsters and stuff and it turned out there are actual books out there with you guys in it!” Y/N turned holding one of the boos showing it to the guys, who didn’t seem to be as surprised as she was. “Yeah, we know.” Sam said rubbing his neck. “What do you mean you know.”

“We know, Chuck writes those, he is a prophet of the lord.” Dean filled her in. “So, you mean you guys knew this and didn’t bother to tell me? Why?” - “It’s bullshit.” Dean grabbed the book out of her hands. “Please tell me you just bought this one.” - “eh no, actually I bought all of them.” She blushed slightly. “A-all of them?” Dean repeated. “Yes, I want to read about your life story.”

“You could just ask us what you want to know.” Sam tried to help his brother out. “Sam, I don’t even know what to ask. And this...” She took back the book Dean grabbed from her. “Is something you guys could have told me.” - “Well, don’t get too excited sweetheart, none of it is as accurate as the real deal.“ Dean said. “Besides if neither of you have anything to hide from me, like a, I don’t know fling or long-distance girlfriend or so, you wouldn’t mind me reading it. Would you?” Bobby saw how Y/N was teasing Dean, who’s eyes grew big, probably hoping not all his one nights were mentioned.

“Y/N is right” Bobby added, “What’s wrong if she has some reading material when you guys are gone.” - Which to my defence, you are a lot, lately.” She wrapped her arms around Dean trying to sway him. Looking all puppy eyes at him. “Alright, fine. I’m going to work on Baby.” He said turning to the back door.

“Oh eh sweety?” Dean stopped walking, she never used that nickname unless she needs something. He gave her a what now look. “Talking about working on cars, Bobby said I could pick a car out, to stop using his.” - “That’s good for you.” he wanted to move on. “But since I know nothing about that, and you are sooooo good at fixing cars... I thought, you know.” Dean’s head fell in his neck, “I don’t have time to fix an entire shipwreck for you.

“Oh ok, never mind, you know, next time I could just take baby for a spin.” She heard Sam laughing at the background. “Fine, which one do you want.” - “Don’t care, you choose.” she kissed his cheek before joining Sam on the couch. "Oh and Dean?” - “Hm” - “Take your time it’s not urgent. Thanks.” - “Good cause baby comes first.” - “Deal” She said while he closed the door behind him.

“You really know how to work that man.” - “I have no choice Sam. You are at least once in a while allowed to drive that car.” - “I have to get into town driving the car everyone knows is Bobby’s. People start to talk.”

Y/N took a book Chuck wrote and started to read while Sam took his own literature. Y/N really liked spending time with Sam. It felt like when they were in high school again. Where they had their Thursday “book club”. Truth be told it was just Y/N and Sam hanging out reading books together, not even the same book.

She looked over at Sam seeing him getting off the couch to grab his laptop. Y/N knew he would come back but decided to tease Sam a little like they used to, by putting her legs on his place. “May I?” He asked when he came back. Y/N ignored him.

“Real mature Y/N.” She grinned, “Ok. If that’s how you want to play it.” He pulled on her ankles before he lifted her out of the couch. “Hey! What the...” Trying to throw her over his shoulders but her fighting back made that difficult, although she wasn’t strong enough to fight herself out of Sam’s arms.

Dean walked in, grabbed a beer when he saw his brother holding his girlfriend in his arms, keeping her off the floor while she struggled to get out. “A little help please?” She yelled at Dean who laughed and said “Keep up the good work Sammy. I need a little more time with baby.” and walked out again, Dean got used to their little fights, but Y/N seemed to forget that Sam was almost twice as big as her. She could never win.

“Fine ok, you can have your seat back.” She gave up. “Just my seat?” He grinned, “ Ugh, the entire couch.” - “No, kidding, just my spot is good.” The peace returned in the living room.

“Hey Sam?” - “yeah?” He answered without lifting his eyes from the screen. “You and eh, Ruby, did that really happen?” She could see the colour drawn out of his face. “Hey, I’m not judging. I’m just sorry to read you trusted the wrong person.” she took his hand in hers, his lips curled a little hearing her saying that. “Let’s just see it as a learning process.” He answered. “Hey, you’re not the only one who ‘dated’ the wrong person. Both of them were demons in their own way.”

“You know, you never told me about your ex-boyfriends, why don’t you start with that?” Sam turned to her.

“Still reading that garbage?” Dean interrupted them while walking back in, covered in oil and dirt. “Still working on Baby?” she answered. “Nope, all done, time to pick out your car sweetheart.” - “Great, then I'm done reading.” before she jumped of the couch, she squeezed Sam’s hand a little. Saying, I'm here for you if you want to talk, without using words.

“Ok, sweetheart I’ve looked around, there are a few cars here that don’t need to much work. But personally, I would choose this one.” He stopped her in front of a green 1970 Chevrolet Camaro. “Are you sure? Seems like a lot of work.” - “The paint for the body will cost a little, but I checked and I’m sure that what’s inside will last a long time. And Bobby has parts all around this junkyard that I can re-use.”

“Not what I meant, I thought of, I don’t know a normal small car?” - “My girl gets to drive an American classic. Nothing will last longer. Period.” She hugged him, “Besides, you’re used to driving Bobby’s Chevelle by now, switching to this won’t be difficult.” - “I’m very grateful honey, thank you.” She wiped his cheek before giving a soft peck on it. “I can think of a thing or two how you can thank me” He wiggled his eyebrows before he pulled her into a kiss.

“Dean!” the love birds heard Sam yelling, waving his hands to tell them to come inside.

“Chuck just texted me. He needs us.” The older Winchester pinched his nose. “Chuck as in, the guy who writes these books? Great would love to meet him!” - “No, no, no way! You never go out on a hunt with us.” - “Dean baby please. I won’t hunt I’ll stay in the motel and chat with Chuck. Keep him busy while you two do your business.”

Dean hated the idea of Y/N joining them, but as usual she convinced him with a little help from Sam.

They arrived at the address Chuck had texted, only to realise they were lured there by Becky. Who was waving from the moment the black impala was in sight. Dean parked the car with a big sigh. “Your girlfriend is here.” - “She is not my... never mind.” Sam rolled his eyes. “Girlfriend?” Y/N popped her head between the two men. “Who is she?”

“Becky, another crazy fan of the book you’ve been reading ever since we left.” Dean pointed to the book at the back seat.

“You didn’t want me to help you with this hunt, so I have to distract myself.” The three of them walked their way to Becky and Chuck who just walked out. “What are you doing here?” He asked. “You texted us.” Sam looked confused. Chuck turned to Becky. “No actually that was me.” she confessed.

She explained how she was hosting a SPN convention with Chuck as guest and that she wanted Sam to be there as well. Y/N couldn’t hold back a giggle. Becky looked over at her, “who are you?” - “This is Y/N. She is...” Sam started, Becky’s face changed while she interrupted Sam, jealous of Y/N ... “Your old high school crush! The girl you wished you lost your virginity to, the girl you hoped you could be her first as well...” Dean gave her a I really don’t want to hear this, look.

Becky rambled on, “The girl who didn’t like you the way you liked her. Oh, I know. The one who hurt you.” - “Dean’s girlfriend.” Sam finished. “She is Dean’s girlfriend.”

“Hi.” Y/N waved probably looking as red on her cheeks as Sam by now.

It’s felt really weird that someone she didn’t know, knew about her. She made it very clear she though Y/N was a villain in this story.

“H-how do you know that?” Sam asked feeling his cheeks getting redder by the minute. - “I read it.” - “There is only a small part of me in the books." Y/N looked at Sam who shrugged his shoulders. “Well, I wrote a lot of drafts, not everything made the book.” Chuck added. “Let me guess and Becky read all of them? Great” Dean said annoyed.

“I still think you should have added the part where Y/N ditched Sam on their last book night, their last night in town, pretended to be sick just to sneak out, to fiddle with Dean.” Sam looked at her.

“Wait, you said that you stayed on the couch all night.” Y/N opened her mouth but before she could answer Becky did. “Yeah, the backseat of the impala you mean. At the football pitch at night with Dean’s body to keep her warm.” Clearly adding oil to the fire.

“Wow! That didn’t happen!” Dean interfered “First off, it was the front seat.” - “Not helping!” Y/N gave him an angry look.

“And second, we didn’t do anything. Did we make out, yes, but that’s all!” He looked at Sam who glanced over at Y/N. “Like I told you before, nothing happened.”

Becky puffed, “He wanted to, though.” Dean cocked his head while giving Y/N a lopsided smile, clearly not apologising for it. Making her roll her eyes.

After the awkward introduction they strolled around the convention Becky organised. Y/N stopped Dean by the arm. “Hey, eh I would like to find a motel before the three of us have no choice but to stay in the impala.” She saw the grin on his widen, “Hm, want some sexy time, eh?”

“What?”- “Were standing in a hotel sweetheart. Enough rooms.” He pulled her in for a small kiss. “I'm not staying the night here, it gives me the creeps, Dean.”

“Well, I'm hungry, so let’s stay here for the dinner, and if you still feel the same afterwards...’ His hands dropped to her behind, squeezed her flesh. “We’ll leave, let’s take the impala and find our self a nice cosy place to relive that one night.” He winked. Y/N’s head dropped “D, that’s not what I mean!” but he was too focused on food to hear her.

She noticed Sam standing at the bar, Becky sitting at the table trying to flirt with him. He’s trying to friendly ignore her, but this girl had no idea how to stop. They locked eyes, giving her the please save me stare.

“She is really into you, isn’t she?” Y/N laughed while she wrapped her arms around his, turning him with his back against her, so now Y/N was facing her. “I really believe she is nice. Just.” - “Weird? Creepy? Obsessed.” - “Yes, yes and yes. You know she writes like her own fictional stories about us.” - “That’s cute.” Y/N looked over seeing her giving Y/N a dead stare.

“Yeah, maybe if they were, innocent.” - “Wait what?” - “Uhu.” Y/N blinked her eye’s a few times. “You are telling me, that sweet looking girl writes fan fiction porn about you?” Sam nodded “Like I said, uhu.” - “And you read it?” Y/N was in shock.

“What? No! I read one story she e-mailed to me last time we met. It was innocent but then when I searched her page, I found... weird stuff.”

“Wait how weird are we talking, like you whipping her or choking?” Sam raised his brow. “Don’t act all innocent Sammy. We both know that is not the worst thing in the world. Bet you even like it!” She rubbed her shoulder against his. “Y/N, seriously.” Sam wasn’t amused “Ok, sorry, what does she write then.”

“About me and Dean.” - “Ok.” - “Together.” Her face turned pale. “Like, together, together?” - “Yeah.” Y/N looked over Sam’s shoulder to Becky. Sam saw the wheels in Y/N’s head turning. “Please don’t tell me you like that.” He asked nervous. “What? Ew, no, that isn’t even legal!” - “Oh, so if it was you would like it?” - “Oh god no Sam, I’m just trying NOT to picture it. And not to freak out!”

“Sam, I’m feeling really uncomfortable. I really don’t want to be here tonight, you mind finding us a motel?” - “You want to get out of here?” She nodded quickly. “Please.” She gave him the puppy eyes. “Great!” He looked around, no Dean in sight. “Let’s go. We’ll tell Dean when we get back.” Sam pulled her in front of him, holding his hands on her shoulders to pushed her through the door.

But Becky saw all of it, she didn’t hear a word, but the fact that they were sitting so close together and now left together made her jealous and suspicious. Sam “borrowed” one of the other cars that were parked outside and left.

When they arrived at the motel Becky’s jealousy grew, she saw how Sam took the key and opened the door for Y/N following her inside.

Not long after she sees Sam walking outside when Y/N opened the door in a robe calling him for something. She heard Sam yell. “Just make sure you’re ready, I’ll be right back.”

Becky couldn’t bear the thought of what was happening inside. So instead of walking up to the room and confront them she drove back. But before she would walk back inside, she called Chuck to come outside.

“I think Y/N is cheating on Dean.” She said while walking around the premises. ”What?” Chuck couldn't follow her, literally and figuratively. “I think Y/N is cheating on Dean, with my Sam. I saw them at the motel a few minutes ago.” - “You followed them?” - “I HAD to Chuck. I don’t want her to use him. She will break his heart all over again.”

By the time Chuck and Becky walked back they saw Sam and Y/N walk back to the convention. Y/N wrapped her arm around the tallest brother, hugging him quickly. ”Thanks Sam. For helping, I really needed to get away from this.” - “If feel you. This place is weird, and I don’t want to spend the night too close to Becky.”

“Sam Winchester, not afraid of ghosts and monsters but scared to dead of a female.” - “You really don’t know her.” He tried to defend himself. “Ha, who knows she might sneak into your bed and you hear her whisper in your ear. ‘Oh Sammy bear, hold me tonight in your strong arms’.” She acted out the scene a little too loud. Sam laughed at her drama performance.” You’re going to give me nightmares.”

“See?!” Becky looked back to Chuck, “I never saw that as sexual tension. I thought they were just teasing each other. You know like brother and sister.” They ran after Y/N and Sam. “Where were you? The quiz is about to start.” Dean asked while walking up to them. ”By the way the buffet was amazing!” Sam gave a grinned look at Y/N and walked away.

“I’m happy you filled your tummy.” She padded his stomach and kissed him. “Do you have a new parfum?” Dean asked. “Eh, no why?” - “Dean? Can I talk to you?” He looked over his shoulder seeing Chuck and Becky looking nervous. “I’ll keep a seat for you.” Y/N said while clearly feeling she wasn’t supposed to stay.

Becky walked towards her turning her away from the room. “I know what you’re doing.” - “Sorry?” - “You want them both don’t you? Is Dean not good enough for you?” Y/N looked at Dean seeing him looking back at her a little angry.

“I, no we, saw you with Sam at the motel.” - “Becky, we went to rent a room.” - “Oh, really is that why you screamed “Oh Sammy bear, hold me tonight in your strong arms’?” Dean’s eyes grew big. - “Cheater!” She yelled before walking away leaving Dean and Y/N alone in the lobby. “Y/N?” She could see the fear in his eyes.

But before they could say another word one of the guests ran towards them screaming, he saw 3 little kids covered in blood. Sam asked Becky if that was part of the convention, but the brothers quickly learned this wasn’t part of the plan.

Y/N and Becky gathered all the guests and staff at the buffet. “Becky, Salt!” She yelled while throwing it towards her. Both women covered every door and window. Trying to keep the ghosts out.

Meanwhile Sam and Dean did what they did best. Fight while they were fighting ghosts.

“So, you’re still not over Y/N are you?” Dean bit towards Sam while they were walking to the graves. “What are you talking about?” - “Becky and Chuck saw you two all cuddly and close.” Sam was confused. “Saw us doing what?” - “Oh you know what I mean!” He turned around standing toe to toe with his younger brother. “Why Sam? Why Y/N?” - “Dean really, I have no idea what you’re talking about.”

Dean started to get frustrated. “Is this because she chose me? Or because we made up a little lie just to get together when we were young?” He walked away again “Dean seriously what are you talking about?”

“Motel, Sam! They saw you two at the motel.” - “You didn’t want to go with her, you wanted to eat. So, she asked me.” Dean turned back around clocked his brother in his face. The anger behind the punch was enough to make Sam fall on the ground.”

“The fuck Dean!” Sam placed his hand on his eye. “So, because I didn’t go with her, you thought hey why not, having sex with my brother’s girl was always on my ‘to do’ list? I can’t believe you did this to me. You know I love her!” - “O-of course, but I never ...” - “Dude she smelled like cheap motel soap!” - ”We never did anything Dean! I swear.”

Dean saw the honesty in his eyes. “She is my friend and I never even think about her that way. I promise!” - “Never?” - “Never!” - “Cause you two are very close and ‘handsy’ sometimes.” - “She is like a sister, we fight constantly.” Sam said still sitting on the ground. “What if things were different? What If she wanted?” - “She doesn’t want me Dean, and I don’t want her.” - “You used to.” - “When I was 16. Please man, we didn’t do anything I swear!”

The older brother thought for a second. “Then what did she mean by: Oh Sammy bear, hold me tonight in your strong arms’ - “We were laughing, joking what Becky would say if she had a change to sneak into my room. A-and the motel, Y/N was spooked in that old hotel, clearly, she is right. She wanted to book a room before there were no more available. So, I took her.”

“And the shower?” - “She said it would calm her nerves.” - “What did you do during the shower?” Dean was still not convinced. “Got food, we ate we got back. Ask her!” Dean nodded sticking his hand out to Sam. Lifting him of the ground. “Let’s finish this job first, talk later.”

Sam and Dean got back at the hotel. Y/N ran towards Dean, clinging on to his neck. “Oh god I'm so glad you are ok.” Dean placed one hand between her shoulders while his other still carried the shovel.

Dean smelled the unfamiliar scent of soap on her. “I think we need to talk.” He said looking over at Chuck and Sam. Seems like Sam was already giving them a piece of his mind.

“Dean baby, what Becky said...” he kissed her before she could say more. “It’s ok.” He said. “No, I was teasing Sam, I pretended to be Becky. I would never.” He smiled softly. “I believe you, I never really believed them anyway.” He shrugged his shoulders trying to play it cool.

“Oh really? Then why does Sam look like he ran into a door?” Dean grinned “The ghost did that.” He pulled her close. “I’m sorry sweetheart, I just, sometimes I'm a little jealous of the bond you have with him, and Chuck telling me you two went to a motel without telling me... Guess it made me nervous.”

“Dean, I only want to stay in your strong arms, .” she over did her act again. Dean’s lips curled slightly up. ”Is that a promise?” She nodded slowly. He felt her fingers going through his hair pulling him in.

“Does your offer of re-living that night still stand?” She asked before biting his bottom lip softly. Dean’s eyes grew big before they changed into his bedroom eyes .

“Absolutely” He answered with a husky voice.

Let me know what you think! Like, comment, share ❤️

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jasmines-library · 9 months

Note

Can you do a Winchester sister fic pls where the sister gets years taken off her life by saving Dean (how Dean took years off his life to save Bobby in season 5) and she’s running out of time and while Sam is finishing up the poker game against the witch to save her, she dies in deans arms (the sister is closer with Dean and always looked up to him and the boys ofc are always protective of her) but then Sam wins the poker game and brings her back

The Curious Case of Dean Winchester

Note: This one was really fun to write. I hope you don't mind that I added my own little twist onto the episode (S5E7) and that it's pretty angsty: I couldn't help myself.

warnings: Death but only brief, swearing once or twice.

Word count: 2.3K (wow it's been a hot minute since I've written like this and i've missed it)

⛤ SPN MASTERLIST ⛤

“Don’t do anything stupid.”

Those were the last words Dean Winchester told you before you split off to search the other side of town. Of course, that is exactly what you did.

As soon as Cliff Whitlow, the missing victim, had revealed the man behind his so-called miracle, you knew exactly what you had to do. The man behind the unusual deaths- Patrick, was a witch- a powerful one at that. And you needed a Witch.

See, Dean had got himself into a predicament. He had made a deal with a crossroads demon so that Bobby could walk again. He couldn’t bear to see him so miserable anymore, so he did what he thought was the right thing to do. Bobby was mad, you and Sam even madder, and you were now running out of time to find a way to get him out of it. It frustrated you that Dean’s impending doom was creeping up slowly on you, ready to grab him at any second, but no one was doing anything about it. So you took matters into your own hands.

You took the elevator around the back of the bar down to the basement after bribing the bartender with enough money to make you cringe. It was rickety and jolted unnervingly as it descended, opening up into another bar. Few people lingered around sipping from glasses of spirits that lined the walls, though you paid little attention to them because your gaze had locked onto him. He sat smugly in a secluded section of the room behind a table a poker game had been laid out on. Leaning back on his chair he watched his latest victim bet away his life. He was using magic to enchant the poker chips, grinning as he scooped the man's chips towards him, watching as his face turned ashen and grey.

“That’s a cruel trick you got there.” You said making your way over to the table.

“Thank you.” He shrugged, rearranging the black and red chips with a smirk. “I take it you’re here for a reason?”

“I want to play.”

He glanced up at you, raising a brow and speaking to you with a thick, Irish lilt. “You look awfully young for someone trying to get more years… that is unless?”

“I’m not a witch.”

“I see.” you were intriguing him now. “How can I help you?”

“My brother. He made a demon deal. I need you to get rid of it in return for my years.”

The witch tilted his head as he looked at you keely. “Now slow down there, princess. Cancelling a demon deal is a very difficult thing to do. Takes a whole bunch of magic and persuasion to do that. Giving me a few years isn’t going to be enough.”

“30.” You laid down.

“Tempting.” He hummed, “But I think we can have some real fun with this. What do you say?”

“Whatever. Just help my brother.”

“Good answer. I’ll play for your brother’s deal. You win, I'll try to cut your brother's deal.”

“And if I lose?”

“60.” The staggering number almost made your heart stop, but you were doing this for Dean. Sam needed him. The world needed him. “But it’ll start slowly until you least expect it.”

“Deal. Oh and one more thing.”

The witch leaned forwards in his chair

“Dean can’t play to replace my years with his own.”

“You must be very desperate.” The witch mused, gesturing for you to take a seat as he began to shuffle his deck of cards. “That or you’re extremely stupid. Who knows. But I like you. You show loyalty to your family and that’s very important. Perhaps, once you lose I might even see if I can remove your brother's deal. I’m feeling generous today.”

You narrowed your eyes at him. “Just shut up and play.”

“Y/N?”

Dean’s voice made you stop dead in your tracks as you rounded the corner after stepping out of the elevator. He stared at you with an irascible look, though you could see the confusion hidden in his eyes.

“What the hell are you doing here?” He hissed at you. You were supposed to be across the other side of town. When the three of you split up, you took off in the wrong direction to slip into the bar before your brothers found it. You had taken the receipt from one of the victims' jackets and raced down there in hopes that you would make it out before one of them stumbled across it. I guess you were just incredibly unlucky today.

“Planting daisies.” You said sarcastically as you tried to push your way past your brother so he wouldn’t see your face. “What’s it look like?”

“So you found the game?” He queried, chasing after you.

“Yep.”

“Did you stop it?”

You kept quiet and continued on straight. You had lied to Dean hundreds of times before so why couldn’t you bring yourself to do it now?

“Y/N?”

You stopped, turning to face him with a sigh.

“Not exactly…”

You could see the dread on his face now. “What did you do?”

You swallowed thickly. “I played. Okay?”

Dean Winchester stared at you dumbfounded for a moment, his lips twitching as he struggled to process the right words. “And?”

“...I lost.”

Your brother nearly exploded. “Are you kidding me?! The one thing I told you not to do was ‘anything studpid’. And you played some He-witch?!”

“Someone had to do something Dean! I can’t just sit by everyday knowing that you could be dragged away from us any second. I can’t go through that again Dean.”

“You idiot.” He was blaming himself, you could hear it on his tongue; the way he seethed. “Sammy and I are looking for something. We will find something.”

“That’s what you said last time. And I'm sorry Dean, but I can’t. Sammy needs you. The world needs you.”

“And you don’t think we need you?! You can’t go throwing your years away.”

“They’re my years. I can do what I want.”

“How many did you lose Y/N?”

“60.”

Sam bustled through the door trying to balance a tray of drinks and a paper bag filled with fast food. He slid them on the counter and tossed his keys beside them as he called out.

“Are you guys home?”

“In here, Sammy.” Dean emerged from the bathroom and Sam could tell his brother was mad. He was wearing that stern look and his voice was agitated.

“Where’s Y/N?”

“Here.” You bundled through the door, glancing silently between your brothers gripping a candy bar you had wrangled from one of the vending machines. You didn’t really want it you just needed an excuse to get out of the motel room and escape from the tension and side glances that Dean shot your way.

Sam studied you for a moment as you pulled out a chair to slump on. At first glance he hardly noticed it, but he realised that you looked older. Not by a lot, but you moved differently and your eyes were ever so slightly more creased.

“Either of you two wanna tell me what happened?”

“Y/N’s got a death wish. That’s what happened.” Dean stated, rummaging in the bag that Sam had brought back from the diner.

“Oh so I was just supposed to let you die? Again?”

“Yes. Or find another way.” Dean spat back at you but you knew he was scared. Scared and feeling guilty for what your near future might entail.

Sam blinked as the two of you argued, firing words at each other. “Whoa. Slow down. What happened? Did you find the witch?”

“Oh yeah. Y/N found the witch alright, Sammy. Why don’t you tell him what happened, Kid?”

“I played.”

“You what?”

“I played for Dean’s deal to be spoiled… and I lost.”

“Oh God, Y/N/N… How much did you lose?”

“60…” You started, watching the horror cross his features. “But he’s taking them slowly. Waiting until we least expect it.”

“And there’s the punchline.” Dean could have laughed.

Sam was in shock, though he understood why you had done it. He understood why you were hurting. He was there when Dean was taken. He saw how broken up it made you and he saw how you clung to him when he returned, hesitant to leave his side for weeks.

“Oh kiddo.” he sighed “What have you gotten yourself into?”

“You know, I still think I should play.” Sam said. The three of you had just broken into the Witch’s flat. Sam and Dean believed that if they got hold of the chips then they could find a way to get you your years back, but you had been caught and the witch had revealed that the chips had nothing to do with it. That was when Sam was given the idea to play for you. In the meantime you could feel your body changing and see the lines being etched into your face.

“No. No.” Dean cut his brother off straight away. “You’re not good enough. I’m better, Y/N's way better. We both lost.”

“What so I don’t get a say in this anymore? Dean can’t play so I’m the only option we got. I’ve watched you hustle plenty of poker games. Hell, that’s how Y/N learnt-”

“Sammy.” You pleaded. You knew that if this went wrong everything you did would have been for nothing. “Please. No.”

“Y/N. We can’t just let you… you’ll die. We’re going to find you a way out of this. I promise.”

“Take it.” The blonde woman, the one from the bar and the witch’s apartment, was perched on your bed as the three of you hustled back into the room. Dean’s fingers instinctively reached for the gun he had tucked in his waistband. “It’ll help.”

Sam took the parchment gingerly, turning it over in his hands before reading the messy handwriting scrawled across the page. “What is this?”

“The most powerful reversal spell you’ve ever laid your eyes on.”

“And it reverses what?” Dean asked.

“Patrick’s work. All of it.”

“You saying she could be normal again?” Your brother’s hand found your shoulder protectively.

“Her and everyone else he’s ever played.” She said before adding “who’s still alive.”

“Why the hell should we trust you?” Sam scowled.

“Trust me, don’t trust me. I don’t care.” She stood and made her way to the door. “The spell is real.”

“If it zaps everyone, doesn’t that include your man?” Dean asked.

“And me too.” She shrugged, “I look good for my age.”

“Lady, this don’t add up for shit.” Dean said. “Why would you want that?”

“I have my reasons.” her hand went to fiddle with the silver locket around her neck before she fled. “Do it quickly. We leave town tomorrow.”

The spell hadn’t worked.

When Dean tossed the toothpick Sam had smuggled him into the flames he looked up at you with a hopeful glint in his eyes but nothing happened. You didn’t get younger. And Sam was still betting his life away against that witch.

You could feel it now, the way your life was slowly slipping away. At first you didn’t really notice it, but as soon as you began pursuing Patrick, you knew your end was approaching quickly. You supposed that ‘when you least expected’ was a lot closer than you expected. The thought made you bitter as you shuffled into the car, wincing at the way your joints ached the way they would after a long hunt or session at the gym.

Dean glanced at you through Baby’s mirror as he sped down the road towards Patrick’s apartment in search of some more of his DNA. His concern grew as you climbed the stairs much slower than you would usually have done and as you entered his room.

The two of you searched quickly, looking anywhere for a speck of something that might contain just a speck of his DNA. another one of those toothpicks or something. Albeit the pair of you were struggling to find anything.

And then it is you. All at once your joints popped and clicked as your body changed suddenly. You cried out in pain as your brother ran to your side to catch you before you could hit the ground.

“No. No. Not yet.”

You blinked up at him as you struggled to breath, your heart slowing as your body forgot how to function.

“Dean…” Your voice faded as he cradled you in his arms. Your breaths slowing and your eyes fluttering.

“No.” His voice broke as he fumbled for his phone. “No you hang on sweetheart. Come on Sammy, pick up!”

There was no answer as Dean’s phone rang and went straight through to Sam’s voicemail. “Son of a bitch!” he exclaimed as he through his phone across the room, tears streaming down his face as he clung to you. Watching your chest slowly rise and fall. Up and down…up and down…up..and…down…up-

There was nothing after that. You lay morbidly still in his arms as your body ceased to function.

“No! Y/N. I can’t lose you now. Please….”

You did not move and the room was filled with the sound of your big brother’s grief and he sobbed. And then, you took a gasping breath and sat up abruptly in his arms.

Your body had returned to normal. The extra wrinkles around your eyes and the grey hairs gone. Your breaths were steady and your heart was strong.

“Y/N/N?” He whispered.

“Dean?” Your eyes searched him. “Sammy did it.”

“Yeah.” He breathed out, squeezing you tightly. “I knew he would.”

Dean’s phone began to ring from across the room. Reluctantly, he peeled himself away from you as he moved to get it, though his attention never strayed far from you.”

“Dean?!” You heard your other brother over the speakers. “Is she okay?”

“Yeah. You did it, Sam. She’s going to be just fine.”

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janicho88 · 1 year

Text

When It All Falls Apart -Chapter 6

Pairing- Jensen x ex!Padalecki Reader

Word count- 2,454

Warnings- Some language. Drinking, dealing with a breakup. Angst, If I missed something let me know!

A/N-Sorry for the last chapter, but you all had to know it was coming. A little off canon, SPN ended after 10 years. We still got all the characters in during that time though. Thank you to @writercole and @leigh70 for your help with this. You two are amazing!!

Summary-Y/N Padalecki loved acting on Supernatural. Working alongside your older brother and your boyfriend, but after ten seasons the guys have chosen to hang up the guns. Now the three of you are moving on to other projects, but that’s all that needs to change right? While you have moved to Austin to be closer to your family and boyfriend, Jensen is working elsewhere. Distance is only the start of your troubles.

Series Masterlist

Walking out of Jensen’s apartment building you hail a cab to take you to an airport hotel. You manage to keep yourself together until you check in and close the hotel room door behind you. This weekend really couldn’t not have gone much worse. You don’t bother changing out of your clothes before you collapse down on the bed in tears.

Back in his apartment, Jensen is pacing the floor and keeps looking at the door. ‘What the hell just happened,’ he thinks to himself, ‘there is no way things have really been as bad as she thinks.’ Grabbing the half full bottle of whiskey off the counter he takes it to the couch where he drops down in the corner spot. By the time he passes out, the alcohol is much closer to the bottom of the bottle.

You aren’t able to get much sleep Sunday night and you get yourself over to the airport before 5 am. Just in time to find out your flight has been delayed because of the incoming storms. Sitting down in an empty area near the terminal, you pull your hat down further to help hide your face. The black clouds and claps of thunder are very fitting of the current turbulence you feel in your heart.

It is a few hours late, but the plane is finally ready to board. With the layover in Atlanta, you should be arriving back in Texas around 3pm instead of 11:30am. Maybe no one will notice you’re coming home too early then. You aren’t really up to rehashing everything with Gen and Jared when you get back. You didn’t think you would be able to, but you manage to sleep most of the way to Atlanta, making that flight feel much shorter.

Your family isn’t expecting you for a few more hours, so you take a cab back home instead of calling one of them to pick you up. Thankfully, no one is home when you arrive. A half an hour before your flight is supposed to land, you text Jared that you are back early, and have a ride home. You’ve had a little bit of time now to try and make yourself presentable enough to face them, without giving anything away.

Jared and crew arrive home a short time later with some pizza, and you join them in the dining room.

“How was the trip?” your brother asks, around a mouthful of food.

“Okay. Toronto’s a nice city. Saw the aquarium, CN Tower, and did some shopping.”

“How’s Ackles? Is he ready to come home?”

“He’s okay, really busy. I don’t know. He seems to be having a good ole time up there,” you don’t notice the bitterness in your answer, but Jared and Gen do.

“Tom,” Gen turns to her son, “why don’t you go play in the living room?”

“Okay,” the little guy doesn’t take much persuading.

“How are you and Jensen?” she asks once Tom is gone.

“We’ve been better,” you answer vaguely.

“Did this trip help at all?”

“It’s made where we stand pretty clear.”

“That’s good right?” you brother questions.

“Where is that?” Comes from Gen.

You clean up your spot and set your plate in the dishwasher, on your way out of the kitchen you pause and turn to face them briefly. “We broke up,” you announce before disappearing upstairs. Before you shut the bedroom door you hear Gen yelling.

“Jared Tristen Padalecki put that phone down now!”

“I’m going to…”

“Do nothing to interfere in this.”

You aren’t surprised when there is a brief knock right before Jared enters the room. He walks around the room for a moment before sitting down across from you on the bed. “So what happened?”

“I was right, our relationship has run its course.”

“What did he do?”

“Jared, you know I love you, but I’m not letting you put yourself in the middle of this. Some relationships just don’t work out. Jensen’s life and mine just don’t fit together anymore. He has a lot going on, and I just don’t have a place in his life.”

You see your brother clenching his jaw working over what you said, you continue before he can say anything. “The two of you are best friends, what happened between him and I shouldn’t change that. Please don’t let it.”

“I told him if he ever hurt you, I would kick his ass.”

“I believe that, but I’m asking you not to. You also told a few of my exes that, and never followed up, don’t start now.”

“First time for everything,” he mumbles.

“I wish things didn’t turn out the way they did, I really do Jare. I guess it’s better to realize it’s not going to work out now then before things go any further.”

“I don’t understand how this happened, I know Ackles was crazy about you.”

“Was, " is the keyword in that sentence. Can you please just drop it?”

He comes over to give you a hug before leaving the room. When he opens the door, Gen is standing on the other side.

“I just wanted to make sure I didn’t have to stop Jared from doing anything crazy,” she says as she walks in.

Jared gives her a kiss before he leaves and she joins you on the bed. “Seriously, are you okay? I know you won’t bring Jared in the middle of this.”

“No, this fucking sucks,” you tell her as you start to cry again. She moves next to you and wraps you in a big hug.

“I’m so sorry sweetie. I’m here for whatever you need, let it all out.”

“I really thought he was my forever, ya know.”

“What happened this weekend?”

You go on to tell her all about your time in Toronto, ending with the breakup. “I think a part of me is always going to be in love with him. Right now, I can’t even think of seeing him again just knowing how hard it’s going to be.”

“It’s going to sting for a while, but you’re going to get through it. You have friends and family that are going to be there for you to lean on. You said it yourself, the way things have been lately, you didn’t deserve that kind of treatment.”

The two of you sit together a little bit longer before she has to go deal with a shouting Tom. You turn the television on to try and distract yourself before going to sleep. Maybe Bones will help with that.

Up in Toronto, Jensen’s day hasn’t gone off much better. He is awoken by the ringing of his phone. Leaning up from the couch he makes the mistake of opening his eyes and the bright sunlight is not welcomed by his hangover. Closing his eyes he tries reaching around for his phone before finally locating it.

“‘Lo,” he answers.

“Bloody hell, are you still in bed mate?” Karl asks on the other end.

“Never made it there, what’s up?”

“We were supposed to meet for breakfast ten minutes ago before going to work on this scene. Jack, Anthony and Erin are already here. I take it you aren’t going to make it.”

“Fuck.”

“Think you might have already done that last night with your girl.”

Jensen lets out a dry laugh while holding his head. “I’ll meet you at the studio.”

Forcing himself from the couch, he makes his way to the kitchen for some water and pain pills. Drowning those he attempts to get himself ready for the day. Grabbing sunglasses and a hat before leaving the apartment he stops for a greasy fast food breakfast on his way to set.

He is the last one to arrive, everyone else is standing at the back of the room waiting for the choreographer in charge of this fight scene to finish getting ready. Eric is off to the side going through notes with the director.

“Where’s your better half? She comin around for a tour today?” Karl asks, looking around.

“She’s gone,” Jensen says lowly before taking a drink of his coffee.

“I thought she said her flight was this afternoon?”

Jensen just shrugs.

Karl takes a minute and studies the man who has become a friend to him. “What’s going on?”

“Nothing,” Jensen walks over to a chair and sits down by himself waiting for things to start.

They have been given instructions for this scene yesterday and today, some of it has even been demonstrated. They go through the first rehearsal, and there are some mistakes all around. By the fourth time, it seems to be mostly Jensen who is struggling with it. They call for a break and Karl takes him off to the side.

“I’m going to ask this one more time. What is going on?”

“Nothing.”

“That’s a load of shit. You’re fucking awful out there, and you smell like a damn brewery.”

Jensen sighs and turns away running a hand down his face before looking back to his friend. “Y/N left me last night.”

“To go back home? We’ve got less than a month left of filming now, before long you’ll be back home with her. Or hop a plane to go see her this weekend. Pull it together, mate.”

Karl starts to turn back around, but the next sentence from Jensen stops him. “No, she left me. Said I was an asshole and she couldn’t take things anymore. Or something like that.”

“I’m sorry.”

Jensen just nods, “let’s try this again.”

It takes a few more tries, but they all finally get it down the way Kripke and the director want it. As they are all grabbing their things, Karl goes over to talk to Jensen, but Eric beats him to it.

“I heard what you said to Karl. I think you and I need to talk.”

Jensen doesn’t say anything as he follows his boss and long time friend out of the room and to his own trailer. Eric waits for him to open it up before following inside.

“What’s going on?”

“I thought you said you heard what I said to Karl?” Jensen retorts as he grabs two waters out of his fridge.

“I did, and I also talked to a very upset Y/N last night at the restaurant.”

“I’m sorry she bugged you to bring her along.”

“She didn’t, I ran into her in the elevator. Why didn’t you bring her, or invite her along?”

“She isn't part of the cast.”

“I know this group and they include friends and significant others when they go out if someone is in town. Have things really gotten that bad between the two of you?”

“That’s what she seems to believe. I thought we were fine. Things have been busy, I don’t see her much, but I didn’t think it was anywhere near as bad as she seems to.”

“You were putty in that girl's hands the first time you met. Took you long enough to act on those feelings. Watching you last night, today even. I don’t think she is too far off from her claim. Maybe this role is getting in your head a little bit.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?” Jensen questions him with a glare.

“Think about it. You were actually so pissed off that I brought her along last night, you made her leave. The guy she used to date, would have gotten up the moment he saw her, had his arm around her the whole night showing her off to his friends. I’ve never known you to be upset at seeing her.”

Jensen doesn’t respond to that.

“I remember walking by you facetiming each other in between scenes if one of you wasn’t on set, even before you started dating. I barely hear you talk about her now, let alone talking to her.”

“No phones on set policy here, remember.”

It’s Eric’s turn to roll his eyes. “You’ve been a friend a long time, and I would hate to see you lose probably the best thing that has ever happened to you, because you are being an idiot.”

“She left me.”

“When you go home after filming wraps, and you have a chance to get your head out of your ass, you might want to buy some knee pads.”

“What for?”

“You’re going to have a lot of groveling to do. Before she left, she asked me to keep an eye on you, she still cares about you.” Having said his peace Eric walks out of the trailer.

The door doesn’t stay shut for long, Karl is coming in next. “So what happened?”

“Eric talked to Y/N last night, apparently he seems to see her side.”

Karl stares at Jensen before rolling his eyes and shaking his head. “I mean what happened with you and your girl? I was a little surprised she left the restaurant.”

“I told her she shouldn’t have made Eric bring her.”

“So you were just going to leave her home alone?”

“Why is everyone so caught up on that? It was a cast get together.”

Karl holds up his hands. “So she left because you made her go home?”

Jensen starts pacing his trailer. “Why is that everyone’s hangup here? Everything I do is for us, yet she can’t see that. I work hard so that we can have a good life. She says we never talk, that’s not true. Then she tells me she doesn’t mean anything to me anymore. I don’t know what more she wants from me. All I do is for her.”

Karl is quiet for a minute, “this about forgetting her birthday?”

“I didn’t forget, I just didn't realize it was June already. Besides, I made that up to her already.”

“I see, she seemed like a great girl. Sorry, things didn’t work out for you two. Do us all a favor tonight, we got some big scenes to film tomorrow, try and keep it sober.” With that Karl makes his exit also.

Jensen throws his bottle of water across the trailer in frustration. Grabbing his bag he heads out to the car to get out of here and back to the apartment where no one will give him any more shit tonight.

Despite Karl’s earlier remark, he pulls a beer out of the fridge as soon as he’s out of the shower, he finds himself in the bedroom staring at the picture of the two of you on his nightstand. ‘How the hell did we get to this point?’ he thinks to himself as he drowns the bottle and tips the picture down. The sight of your smiling face hurts too much to see.

Thank you for reading!

Chapter 7

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#supernatural #jensen ackles rpf #jensen x female!reader #jensen ackles x reader #When It All Falls Apart

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where-dreamers-go · 1 year

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"Kill This Love" spn Gabriel x Reader

(A/N: Look what I found in my notebook from about five months ago. The idea is written in pink mainly and some is in the margin in black in the beginning… Reader was put under a dangerous spell that forced them to have a fierce goal of killing Dean, Sam, Castiel, and anyone who got in their way. Warnings: canon violence, guns, angst, use of (Y/N), a dagger, mention of a wound (not descriptive). Word Count: 963 words)

~~~

It had snuck up on you. There had been no signs to alert you ahead of time.

Forced under a dangerous spell. A fierce drive to end Dean, Sam, Castiel, and anyone who got in your way. The perfect spell to put on a hunter.

The group hadn’t seen you in a few weeks. So none of them expected even your presence. Your last hunt was successful, but someone saw an opportunity.

Someone unknown and immediately on my list, you thought.

You entered the bunker in a raged trance. A handgun at the ready.

A bunker was hardly useful if its inhabitants were caught vulnerable, all safe, and relaxed.

Sam glanced up in surprise while setting the table for lunch. Any smile disappeared.

BANG!

“Ah! What—?” Sam dove behind the counter. Bullet in his leg.

You were lucky to have not aimed at a vital organ. Yet your legs continued you forward.

Dean came running in, weapon drawn, from the shot fired and Sam’s shouting. He was extremely shocked to see you.

You proceeded to unload the rest of the round trying to hit Dean.

Why don’t they get out of here? Trick me into a room!

The brothers’ attempts to reason with you fell through. You could listen all you wanted, but the struggle inside continued. You reloaded in a moment.

You wanted blood.

All the while they tried to get the upper-hand. Predictable.

Do something different!

Dean made an urgent call to Castiel as soon as Sam tackled you to the ground in an attempt to restrain you. The tall Winchester moved fast.

You hoped he was strong enough. You hoped they all were.

Castiel popped in while trying to assess the situation. Hearing as your mind watched on as your body attacked your friends. You were straining to take back control.

You bit Sam’s clothed arm. He backed off enough and your fist made contact with his wound.

Castiel moved in to intervene just as you pulled an angel blade out from your layers of clothing.

In a crouch, your expression was hardly your own.

“If you can not stop yourself, I will,” Castiel warned.

“Snap out of it!” Dean urged.

You eyed between the three of them.

Dean walked closer.

“Listen, (Y/N),” Sam said clearly. “Things will get bad—painful—you don’t want to do this. You can stop.”

Castiel and Dean stepped closer.

Of course I want to stop! I WANT THIS TO ALL STOP! I need help, please!

“We can help you,” said Dean.

Your grip on the angel blade only tightened. Fear of the pain to come didn’t stop you from targeting Sam again, him and his disadvantage you inflicted.

Curses echoed through the room.

To your horror, you were striking at Sam. Your friend dodged your attacks with experienced turns.

Kicking low, you made contact with his knee and lunged forward.

Contact wasn’t made.

Sam was unharmed.

Yet the spell over you was not yet broken. Your arms were in a vice grip. Blade unmoving in your hold.

“Easy.” Gabriel’s voice whispered from behind you. “Just give me a second, cupc—.”

In a small bound, you locked your legs around one of the archangel’s legs and pulled him down in a tumble of limbs.

No! Do something. Get the blade away! Hurry!

The two of you struggled. Only Gabriel was on defense, for the sake of you both.

“I don’t want to hurt you.” Gabriel yanked the blade away from you before tossing it out of reach.

Your body couldn’t wiggle out nor break any holds.

Gabriel snapped his fingers.

Tension washed away from your limbs.

You inhaled audibly.

It was over.

You fell into Gabriel’s chest, no longer resisting and attacking. Letting him take your weight as he sat up.

“I gotcha’,” Gabriel whispered.

Testing the movement in your fingers, you focused on your own breathing. Control was back and any thought otherwise unnerved you.

I never want that to happen again, you thought.

Gabriel rubbed a circle on your knee in comfort.

“(Y/N)?” Sam called. “Hey.”

You blinked and your heart sank.

“You good?” Dean asked, gun still in hand.

“I’m so sorry.” You finally spoke. Tears pooled in your eyes. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“Hey, it wasn’t on purpose.” Sam reasoned.

“That doesn’t make it any better. It could’ve been so much worse.”

“Do you know who put the spell on you?” Castiel questioned.

The brothers looked to him pointedly.

“That’s what was going on?” Dean lowered his weapon.

“I don’t know who did it.” You admitted. “But I’ll gladly pay them a visit for what they made me do. I’m so sorry, guys.” Your gaze lowered to Sam’s leg.

Crap.

“Gabe,” you pointed to Sam.

“On it.” He stood up and walked to the Winchester. “Just a second,” he knelt down, “don’t get any ideas.” He winked.

“Sure.” Sam said, not much in a joking mood.

After Sam was healed, you debriefed the group on your actions for the last two weeks and your last hunt. All in order try to find clues of who did it.

“Thank you for helping.” You rested your hand on Gabriel’s as you both sat in the library. “Also, sorry for the ground wrestling death match.”

“You asked for help. I’m not going to leave you hanging…or trying to literally obliterate your friends. Your wrestling could be better.”

“But I don’t know how many apologizes can make up for that. I could have hurt you. I already owe the Winchesters for the surprise visit.”

“I accept dessert and a movie.” Gabriel said simply.

“No dinner?”

“Nope.”

You nodded. “Fair enough. I can buy that chocolate pie I’ve been eyeing.”

“Good to know you still have good taste.” He wiggled his eyebrows.

~~~

(A/N: If you love my writings and want to support me, I have a Ko-Fi where you can buy me a coffee. I would be eternally grateful. coffee

Best wishes and happy reading.)

~~~~~

DreamerDragon Tags: @

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#spn gabriel x reader #gabriel x reader #supernatural gabriel #where dreamers go #spn gabriel #angst #angst with a happy ending

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typicalopposite · 5 months

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*paces the room*

So I just finished season 5!

So MUCH happened I swear going back to look at the episodes synopsis’ for this post I was like… wait that was in this season too?!? I stayed up ALL night TWICE watching this season because I just couldn’t turn it off! It’s crazy that people didn’t like this season (like vehemently didn’t like it at least on Reddit… BUT they say they don’t like s6 because its Buck centric and he “needs to be more of a background character” sooooo clearly I won’t read too into their nonsense)

ANYWAY this season is possibly one of my favorites! From the hackers the gps wrecks and tower scare, the zoo breakout (THE ZOO BREAKOUT OMG… THE ALPACAAAAAAAS! And Buck being scared LOL) to Jeffrey escaping and then Athena’s whole story line following! I was terrified for her and for Harry and ACK!!!!

Maddie’s PPD and leaving arc was so heartbreaking and frustrating at the same time! And I felt so bad for Chim (and Buck) and baby Jee!

OMG the homecoming parade crash and the mixup I was so Heartbroken for them! :(

Claudette… :/ hated her and her ending… but mostly her

Of course Lucifer (spn) shows up as an extremely bad guy but he wants to play dad of the year (ok the guy here at least is thinking of his kid more than himself… but still PARALLELS!)

MICHAEL AND DAVID! I hated to see them go! And that montage had me all teary eyed during one of my all nighters!

Toni’s little love story <3 and the girls from the oil spill! <3<3

Eddie’s panic attacks and leaving the 118 was so sad! But I get it… I also know he will be back because I came from season 7 *shrugs* so it wasn’t too sad, yanno?

I love that everyone still came together for Christmas tho, i was like poor Bobby and Athena </3

Madney reunion… sort of </3 but again…. I know how this ends lol. Also JJ and Kate reunion (criminal minds)

The kiss might be the one thing I truly disliked from the season because it doesn’t really do anything beyond being annoying.

WHY DOES EVERYONE USE BOBBY’S PAST AGAINST HIM WHEN THEY ARE ANGRYYYYYYYYYYYYY :(

Well I have a fear of sauna’s now (and stop signs… and exercising)

The mom that falls saving her daughters had me BAWLING!

Bobby and May’s relationship is everything to me! And ack I knew I didn’t like Jonah

I take back my original assumption of Buck having the worst luck. It’s Chimney. What the hell. Give this man a raise and a vacation… some amazing life insurance and some bubble wrap. How he is alive is beyond me!!

THE LAST EPISODE

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH <3

Toni getting married, and the drama about her missing Hen and Karen’s wedding. Buck’s face when Maddie texts Chim first. Bobby </3 was not ok, but EDDIE CAME THROUGH! And when he poured the whiskey out I was whooop whoooping out loud! THEN THE WEDDING I love Toni so much omg and everyone coming! PLUS no more Taylor :) hahahaha (sorry i just never liked her)

(Omg the maggots in the hair might have too the cake as the worst thing to happen… at least visually… for me)

SEASON SIX HERE I COME! You better be all about Buck like the pissy people on Reddit said you are! And y’all, send me strength for that mid season finale i have seen it dozens of times but this is gonna be different and I have never been so prepared to be unprepared for something in my life! O.o

#911 #911 abc #911 fox #911 show #911 spoilers #911 season 5 #911 fandom #118 firefam #bobby nash #athena grant #evan buckley #eddie diaz #hen wilson #chimney han #maddie buckley #911 cast #five days to the new episode you guys!#and I have a whole season plus half of the current one to keep me occupied

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fangirlingfromdownunder · 6 months

Text

Comfort in a Family Dinner

Summary - Part 58 in the Comfort series

Pairing - Dean Winchester x Reader, Reader x Sam (platonic), Reader x Bobby (father-figure), Andre (OG Character) x Reader (best friends), Garth x Bess, Sam x Eileen

Series Masterlist | Masterlist

A/N: Sorry about the extended break, I ended up needing the week to recover from the trip and meeting J2 (the best weekend of my life FYI). If you ever get lucky enough to get the opportunity to go to a SPN convention, it’s definitely worth it. I loved every minute! But anyway, back to the story at hand…In my mind, the last chapter was gonna be the last one and then this week would be the epilogue. However, I love a good cliffhanger so I couldn’t resist. Looks like we get one more chapter with this lovely couple that I love so much.

While Dean finishes delivering the food to the table you go downstairs with Destiny to get the door. You discreetly check through the peephole in the door before nodding to your little girl and letting her twist the handle. You step back as she pulls the door open.

“Hi, Uncle Sammy!” She says as she runs over to hug his leg.

He kneels down to her height and pulls her into a tight hug. “Hey Kiddo. You gonna give me a tour of your new home?”

Despite having seen the house when he helped move a few of your larger furnishings over, he hasn’t seen the full house in all its glory. Destiny nods enthusiastically and pulls away, but not before grabbing his hand to lead him upstairs. Sam smiles at you and nods in greeting as he’s pulled past you. You smile back as they disappear up the stairs before turning and locking the door.

Once you get back upstairs, Destiny is showing Sam her room, so you go out to the patio where Dean’s leaning on the railing looking out over the dark forest. You quietly sneak up behind him and wrap your arms around his waist. He stiffens for a brief second before placing his hands over yours on his stomach.

“Hey, Sweetheart.”

“You feel tense, what’s on your mind?”

Dean spins around in your arms so he can wrap his arms around you and look you in the eyes. “Just a lot of changes at once.”

“You regret it?”

He shakes his head and kisses you softly. “Just adjusting. I am gonna miss the adrenaline of a good hunt. But, I’m where I want to be.”

“Once Sam and Eileen get their operation on its feet you’ll get to help them out. And it’s not like you’ll never hunt again. I’m sure the monsters won’t leave us alone forever. I just need you to come home safe. No more dying and being resurrected all the time. This family needs you. So, we just won’t seek it out. Plus, I’m sure we can find other ways for you to burn off your energy and get an adrenaline rush.”

“Yeah? Like?” Dean raises an eyebrow at you as he lets one of his hands wander over your ass cheek and squeezes lightly.

“Hey! You have company! We eating or what?” You hear Sam tease from the doorway.

“We were just waiting for you slowpoke,” Dean jeers back. He kisses you quickly before leading you over to the table and pulling out a chair for you. You smile at him gratefully as you sit down. He takes a seat beside you as Sam and Destiny sit on the opposite side of the table.

“Nice place you guys got here. I’m really happy for you. You both deserve to get out and get a taste of normal,” Sam says as he fills his plate.

“Thanks, Sam. We’re still raising a little wolf, so I don’t know how normal it is,” you say as you smile at Destiny as she bites into her rare steak. “But we’re happy and it’s progress. We wish you all the best for you and Eileen’s venture too. We’re here, whatever you need.”

“Thanks. We’re still working out all the details. That’s actually why she couldn’t come tonight, she’s meeting with some other hunters with Bobby. We want to make the Men of Letters Bunker back into what it once was; a hub of activity and a safe home base for others who grew up like us.”

“You’re gonna be a great leader, Sammy. If you ever need a soldier…” Dean adds with his mouthful, “But you have to promise that none of you hunter buddies, or hunters in training will know about or come after our little monster here. Whatever happens, we will handle it ourselves, as a family.” Dean gives you a stern look to make sure you understand his threat and agree.

You nod before giving Destiny a reassuring smile. Sam nods too. “If you’re still planning to go ahead with that appointment in a few weeks, then I guess this is the only niece I’m gonna get. So, I won’t let anything bad happen to her. You have my word. Family comes first, you taught me that. And family don’t end in blood.”

A comfortable quiet falls over the table as you all eat in peace, having got the few concerns out in the open.

Once you’re all finished eating, Sam helps Dean in the kitchen so they can talk alone while you get Destiny washed up and tucked into bed. Despite her desperate pleas to stay up with you guys, you stay firm by bedtime. Werewolf or not, she’s a child and you plan to raise her as such. You kiss her forehead and switch on the nightlight by her bed before switching off the overhead light and closing the door.

Back in the living room, Sam and Dean finish up cleaning the kitchen just as you come back to join them. Dean pulls you into his embrace the second you're close enough and kisses the top of your head. “She go down easy?”

“Nope, definitely tried her best debate skills. But it’s been a big day and she’s tired, it won’t take long.”

“Well, I’ll let you guys relax from your big day. Thanks for dinner,” Sam says.

“Anytime,” you say.

“Call first,” Dean adds as a warning.

“Of course. Have a good night guys, we’ll be in touch I’m sure.”

“You too, Sam. Try not to get too lonely in that big Bunker alone,” you say.

“I’ll be okay. Thanks.”

You and Dean walk him to the door and wait until his car disappears into the darkness before retreating back inside and locking the door behind you.

“Come on, let’s go to bed,” Dean says with his arm wrapped around your waist as he leads you back upstairs.

“Let’s take a bath first,” you counter.

Dean raises his eyebrow, “Or…We could try out the hot tub?”

“Sounds good to me.” You lean up to peck his cheek.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

A/N: Another shorter one to end us off. Let me know if you want an epilogue next week. I hope you’ve all enjoyed reading this story as much as I have enjoyed writing it.

Tag list: (Leave a like or comment on this post or let me know below if you want to be added to the tag list for this series)

@bitchwitch1981, @muhahaha303, @justrealizedimmascifygurl, @mcdowell-123, @leigh70, @marvelsmarauder, @losa12308, @tapedeck-hearts, @luvjaida, @peachtxa, @ambearsstuff, @shadow-of-a-cloud, @slut-for-buck, @iprobablyshipit91, @sassy-pelican, @fallenlilangel99, @heavenlyhopeful0, @nelachu2423, @ladysparkles78, @canyouimaginethatstory, @mrlonelycat, @roseblue373, @staley83

#dean winchester x reader #dean x you #dean winchester #supernatural #spn #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester imagine #dean winchester fic #dean winchester fluff

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klayr-de-gall · 2 years

Photo

Cas followed Dean into the kitchen. Dean didn’t look at him as he pulled a pie crust out of the fridge and flour from the cupboard to start rolling it out.

“I’m sorry,” Cas said.

Dean snorted. “Sorry’s not gonna cut it, sweetheart.”

“I know.” Cas took several deep breaths. “After that night…I asked your father for your hand. He said no.”

“I know that.”

“I was going to ask you to run away with me…but then my father called and told me about Daphne. And I knew you wouldn’t leave Sam and Adam and…I panicked. I knew that without my father’s support, we would struggle and…I didn’t realize at the time…”

“None of that makes this better, Cas. You can sit there and explain anything you want and it won’t fix a damn thing.” Dean glared at him over the counter. “You still left and you have a wife…”

“I don’t,” Cas said. “Daphne and I have been divorced for a year…we never mated.”

Dean froze. “What?”

“I came back,” Cas said. “I came back for you…please…”

There was silence in the kitchen for a long time. “You can’t ask that of me,” Dean said. “Not again.”

“I’m not asking…”

“Yes you are!” Dean threw down his pie dough. “You’re asking me to just fall into your arms because you got rid of your inconvenient wife and assumed I’d be ready to just play the swooning omega again! You thought you could just waltz back in here after twenty years of radio silence and I’d be readily available for you? You thought that none of what happened back then would matter because all I’d need to do is smell your stupid Alpha musk and I’d cream myself trying to get back in your arms?”

“No!” Cas said. “I was content to leave you alone but then I got the invitation and I thought you might be willing to give me a second chance! I know what I did is unforgivable! I know that I should have stood up to our fathers and taken you away from here! I know I should have been here to help you! I’ve spent the last twenty years regretting what I did and I just want to try and make it up to you!”

“There’s no way to make that up! You can’t just ‘make up’ twenty years of leaving me alone with no indication you really loved me and weren’t just trying to get your rocks off! You left! And no amount of apologizing is going to change that!”

“So what am I supposed to do? I have nothing in Pontiac…Claire’s the only family I have left and she’s here. And Jack’s here and you’re here and this is where I want to be…if you’ll just let me stay.”

“I ain’t stopping you.”

“Fine.” Cas moved around the counter, right next to Dean. Dean didn’t push him away, just stared at him. “I’ll be here if you just ask me to stay.”

They were silent, just staring at each other, green eyes boring into his. Cas didn’t flinch, didn’t look away, not from Dean, not from his beautiful omega, standing there smelling like warm pie and cinnamon and sunshine and home. Cas couldn’t tear himself away again, not if he tried, not if he even wanted to.

“Bastard,” Dean muttered, and then they were kissing, fiercely, passionately, teeth colliding, hands moving over each other roughly. Dean bit into Cas’s bottom lip, and Cas bit back, reaching around and grabbing Dean’s thighs to lift him up on the counter, uncaring of the copious amounts of flour spread over it.

—

The first preview for the @spn-mediabigbang comedy fic based on the movie Mama Mia! I am super happy I get to illustrate this A/B/O story written by the amazing @butterflyslinky ! Look for the full fic to be posted in December!

#spn media big bang #media bang 2022 #supernatural #destiel #dean winchester #castiel #spn #they smooching #in the kitchen of all places #really #my art #watch out for the fic!

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holylulusworld · 2 years

Text

Tight Places - Kinktober 19

Summary: Stuck in a cramped space with Sam again, you end up enjoying his company...

Square 3 filled for @samwinchesterbingo: Enemies to lovers

Square 22 filled for @spnkinkbingo (expired): Knife play

Square 8 filled for @spnkinkbingo: Period Sex

Rating: Explicit

Pairing: Soulless!Sam x fem!Reader

Characters: Dean Winchester

Kink: Claustrophilia

Warnings:language, Soulless!Sam being an ass, mentions of anal sex (nothing happens), smut, unprotected sex, groping, period sex, knife play, mentions of

Word Count: 1,2 k

2021 SPN KINK BINGO masterlist (expired but ongoing)

2022 SPN KINK BINGO masterlist

Sam Winchester Bingo masterlist

Kinktober 2022

<< Part 1 - Cramped

“Sam, no! What the fuck! How did we end up in a fucking wardrobe?” you can’t believe you agreed to join the annoying soulless hunter on yet another hunt.

After your mishap a few months ago, you swore to yourself to stay away from Sam Winchester. No such luck.

You ended up in the same town, investigating the same mysterious death once again. Dean suggested joining forces and you just couldn’t say no to the hunter. He saved your ass more than once and is all too happy to have someone with an intact moral compass around.

“We have to hide again,” he purrs in your ear. You can hear the smirk in his voice and just know, he dragged you inside the wardrobe on purpose. “Dean got this.”

“I’m going to help your brother. Don’t believe for a second that what happened months ago will happen again, Winchester,” you grumble. “I told you last time it was the last time.”

“Sure,” he huffs in your ear as his hands already move toward your chest to shamelessly grope your tits. “You’re wearing a dress revealing your ass, legs, and tits for nothing. You want to get fucked.”

You lick your lips. It’s the second time you are in a cramped space with Sam. If only he pushes you a little further, you are going to give in once again.

“I know how much you love ending up in tight space with me,” he bites your ear shell. “How about you tell me what you want, and I give it to you Y/N.”

Sam presses his body to yours, slowly grinding into you. “Sam. Stop.”

“Why would I do such a thing, sweet little thing?” he moves one arm around your waist to hold you close to his hard body. “Admit your sins, Y/N. I know you want to.”

“I fucked a cold-hearted and annoying bastard some months ago. That’s all I have to admit.”

“You enjoyed every second.”

“Yeah. As it only lasted for like sixty seconds.”

“You’re a little bitch.”

You try to wiggle out of his grip but it’s no use. Sam is so much stronger than you, and then there is his arm wrapped around your body.

“You’re an asshole, so we are even.”

“How about I make things easier for you?” he nuzzles his cheek against yours. “I’ll leave you no other choice but to give in.” You feel the cool metal before you can even say something in return. “Feels good, doesn’t it?”

Sam slides the dull side of his knife over your breasts and teases your nipples. He takes his time on his way down your body; drawing patterns into your skin with the dull side of his knife.

“Sam, what are you doing?” He carefully slides it over your thigh, riding up your dress. “I asked you a question.”

“I’ll take good care of your pussy again, Y/N,” you whimper as he kicks your legs apart. “You better don’t move now. It would be a shame if I draw blood tonight.”

“Blood?” there is an edge in your voice when Sam slowly cuts your dress and bra open at the same time. Your breasts spill out, leaving your plush flesh unprotected. “Sam.”

“Be good now, kitten,” he cuts through your dress, ruining it once and for all. “Take the dress off.”

“Sam, we can’t. We are still on a hunt.”

“I said,” he rips the remnants of your dress down your body and cuts your panties off within the blink of an eye, “be good.”

You’re shaking in both, anger, and anticipation. You’d like to slap Sam’s face or shoot his brains out. But the need and your kink won’t let you do such a thing.

You allow Sam to twirl you around to reveal your breasts and face to the hunter.

“Beautiful and all mine.”

“Sam, we shouldn’t…this is wrong,” you open your arms and let Sam lift you off of your feet. He easily holds you against the wall of the wardrobe as you fumble his pants open and shove them down his long legs.

“You’re a little eager for someone who doesn’t want to get fucked,” he smirks darkly, but you ignore his cockiness or the fact that you should hate him.

“Shut up. Don’t ruin it,” you bend your body a little to stroke Sam a few times. He’s already rock-hard and doesn’t need much encouragement. “Fuck me. And then leave me alone.”

“Oh, I will fuck you.”

“I should warn you,” he ignores you, and the fact that you slap his chest to get his attention. “Sam, I think my period just started.”

It’s like you’re not even there. Sam simply wraps your legs around his waistline and shoves himself inside your body without acknowledging your protest.

He grunts, hips jerking a few times as you claw at his shoulders. “SAM!”

“Do you think I care about a little blood?” he snickers as you wiggle your hips to get a little bit more friction. “I can fuck you now and make you cum, or, I’ll leave you here. Naked and without an orgasm. I can easily find someone else to fuck.”

“You’re such an asshol-“ Sam presses his lips to yours, silencing your protests once again as he starts to roll his hips.

“You will shut your mouth and take my cock, Y/N,” he purrs with every thrust. Your hips move on their own, to meet Sam’s thrusts. “Good girl.” He ruts into you. “Such a good girl when you full of cock.”

“I hate you so much.”

“No, you love me,” you whine as he grips your ass with his large hands to move you up and down his cock. You’re like a ragdoll in his hands; helpless and small. “You love fucking me too. I saw the way you looked at the old me. It’s the same hunger in your eyes now.”

Sam hides his face in your neck, panting and groaning as you try not to think about his former self.

You miss the smart and soft Sam. But you can’t deny it. This version knows how to push all your buttons.

“Fuck.”

You dig your nails deep into his shoulders.

“Take it. Shut up and take me,” he growls in your neck. Sam speeds up again, fucking up into you at a maddening pace. “I’m going to fill you up with so much cum your period stops.”

You laugh.

“Later, I’ll fuck your mouth.”

“Nghh…” your mind is clouded by lust and the approaching high. The coil in your belly tightens, and you can only close your eyes and let Sam have his way with your body once again.

“Maybe you’ll let me fuck that upright ass too, huh? I bet you never let that loser you called your boyfriend fuck your ass. Let me fuck it and you’ll cum so hard you see stars…”

“I-“ you cum all over his cock, making an odd noise. “No.”

“We will talk about your ass later. Now let me fill you up,” he chuckles darkly. “Fuck…fuck…fuck…”

“Just like that. Taking me like a good girl,” you groan as Sam rewatches the video he took of you and him months ago again. “Fuck yourself harder on my cock.”

“Can you stop this?”

You throw a pillow at Sam. “Please.”

“If you come over here,” he smirks darkly, “I will stop. And,” he pushes the covers off his body to reveal he’s stark naked, “if you stick around, I’ll delete the video.”

“Scouts honor?” you ask.

“Scout's honor,” Sam points at his cock. “Come here and ride it like a good girl…”

You will stick around to help Dean get Sam’s soul back. If you get laid once in a while…so be it…

Part 3

Tags in reblog.

#Sam Winchester #spnkinkbingo #samwinchesterbingo #SOULLESS SAM #soulless sam x reader #soulless!sam x reader #sam winchester smut #smut #kinktober 2022 #kinktober day 19 #sam winchester x reader

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jawritter · 2 years

Text

Carry On

Chapter 2

Summary: It was just a simple hunt, found on a pie festival. It was supposed to be easy. Something they’d all done one hundred and one times a million. No one could have told Y/N, Dean, and Sam that nothing from that point on would ever be the same again.

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader x Sam Winchester

Word Count: 2796

Warnings: Heavy, HEAVY TW: Dean’s final episode of SPN. (Season 15x20 spoilers). Graphic injury. Me botching medical jargon, A lot of pain, blood, and hospital type atmosphere. Injured Dean Winchester. Angst.

Due to the graphic nature of this fic, and the fact that it will eventually contain Smut. This fic is an 18 + only fic! If you’re under 18 DO NOT read this fic!

A/N: This fic is beta’d by @kazsrm67 Thanks so much love! Please do not copy my work! Feedback is golden! I hope you all enjoy this ride with me!

My Mastlist Series Masterlist

Y/N followed the nurse and Sam down the hallway towards the ICU ward of the hospital with legs that felt as if they each weighed fifty pounds. She never thought in a million years that this would be so hard. For hours, she had sat in that room with Sam on pins and needles; wanting to see him, wanting to know if he was okay, if he’d survived the surgery. Now, as they made their journey through the busy hospital hallways with all the smells of bleach and Lysol burning her nose, as well as sick or injured people rolling around in wheelchairs, or people with bandages tied to random parts of them walking slowly with nurses wheeling IV poles some with multiple bags hanging from them, it only served to send her anxiety through the ceiling.

Thoughts of, ‘will this be Dean one day? Stuck in a wheelchair, watching from his doorway as people moved on about their day or their own recovery while he was trapped in his own body?’

Of all the cruel things in the world that could have happened to Dean, after everything he’d been through, after all he’d sacrificed, being confined to a chair and unable to hunt, unable to drive his baby, unable to do basic everyday things, that seemed the cruelest form of a living hell to her.

All of this flooded her mind knowing that there was a good chance Dean would never wake up again, that infection would set in; he wouldn’t ever survive to get to that point, but she couldn’t make herself believe that. She couldn’t make herself believe that he’d held on this long, survived the flight here, survived being impaled against a fucking poll, just to die on his back in an ICU bed, unable to talk, unable to move, and unconscious. She couldn’t accept that; wouldn’t accept that.

They followed the nurse behind a set of heavy doors that required her to slide her ID badge to open, and stepped into a large room with a huge desk in the middle of it, and curtained off rooms with patients lying in beds. Some, just from standing at a distance, looked worse than others did. Most of them were on some kind of life support, the ones she could see with the curtains open anyway, and it was so deadly quiet in there that you could have heard a pin drop down the hallway. It almost had the same air as a funeral home did right before the services started, and the mourners gathered around to say their final farewell; it made her breath quicken and her chest tighten.

“Okay,” Rayne said as she turned around in front of the blue curtain she’d led them to in the center of the circle of ‘rooms.’ “I’ll give you guys some time, I’ll be right there at the nurse’s desk. Remember, he looks a lot worse than what he actually is right now. He’s stable. He’s a little pale, a little swollen from the surgery and trauma he’s been through; but he’s comfortable. If you need me, I’ll be at the nurse’s desk until I have to come get you guys. I can’t let you stay here, but we allow visitors to come in and check on their loved ones every few hours, and I’ll leave you with a phone number to my desk over there, where you can give his name and call any time for updates. If something happens, whether it’s an increase or a decrease in his stability, or whatever, I will let you know.”

Sam swallowed thickly and nodded as the nurse pulled the curtain to the side, and allowed the pair to step in before she closed it, leaving them alone with Dean.

Nothing could have prepared her for the sight that awaited her there on that bed. It almost didn’t even look like Dean. His face was swollen. He was shirtless and had it not been for his tattoo, she might have argued that they’d brought them to the wrong person. There were tubes coming from his mouth and sides, one of which she assumed was the vent and the others drains. His chest rose and fell in a strange, slow rhythm. His arms were flat down by his sides. There was bruising she could see on his chest, sides, and upper left shoulder. It sent her heart crashing to her feet as she numbly made her way to one side of the bed, and Sam the other.

This couldn’t be real! She was dreaming. This had to be a nightmare, and if Sam wasn’t standing across from her, she probably would have pinched herself to try and wake herself up. Dean looked so helpless, so small in that big bed covered in tubes and monitors. The muffled beep from the heart monitor was maddening. It was all too much, but something, a force she never would understand, moved her closer to him, and she reached to run her fingers through his hair as a fresh wave of emotions crashed into her chest and ran down her face.

“Fuck Dean,” she whispered in a shaking voice. Sam said nothing, he just stood there, eyes glued to his big brother; oversized hands gripping the handrails for support. “Sam, there has got to be something we can do, try and contact Jack, anything? We can’t just leave him like this!”

“He told me not to intervene Y/N. I have to respect his wishes, and besides, even If I could, there’s no way I could get in contact with Jack to have him step in and make this right. He’s not Chuck, he’s left this in our own hands, he said so himself. He’s not gonna be hands on. If you try and do something as stupid as sell your soul for him, that’s not gonna do Dean any favors. I watched it nearly kill him when Dad did it, and if you or I do that; it will kill him. Dean is just gonna have to fight this out on his own. There's nothing we can do.”

Y/N’s emotions were all over the place, and in her grief soaked mind, she felt as if Sam was giving up on him, and it sent her blood pressure through the roof. Like he was just walking away, doing nothing to help, even if she did understand the logic behind his words, it still stung; if she wasn’t standing there with her fingers running through Dean’s hair, she probably would have screamed at him.

“If he survives this,” Sam continued, “He’s not gonna be the same. He’s gonna need someone with him, he’s gonna need you. Y/N there’s some things I just can’t do for him that you can.”

“Oh, I’m not going anywhere Sam, not unless he wakes up and sends me away, but why do I get the feeling you're about to tuck tail and run away?” she bit out, and visibly flinched.

“There are some things I’m gonna have to go home and do, like take care of Miracle. I’ll be back, but you heard the doctor. They think you’re his wife. You’re gonna be number one on the contact list, and I’m not mad about that, please don’t think that, you did what you had to do to get them out there. You’re the reason he’s still alive. I’ll be back, I just got to go get Miracle, and I’ll be back… And maybe even get Eileen.”

“Bullshit,” Y/N growled, as she looked down at Dean’s face. “You’re not coming back.”

“Y/N, I love him, he’s my brother, I’ll be back, but I’ve got to wrap up this hunt, take care of Miracle–it’s really, really hard for me to see him like this right now. Dean’s gonna be in this hospital for a long time, but when he gets out, he’s not gonna be able to travel, I don’t want to set him up at a hotel. I’ll have to rent him an apartment, and Eileen can help with that. We’re gonna all need each other. I might leave for a while, but I trust you to take care of him, and I will be back.”

She knew arguing with him was not something that was going to help either of them right now, and especially not going to help Dean. She could tell by the look on Sam’s face he was struggling; it was hard to see Dean this way. The man that had always been there for him and taken care of him when quite frankly no one else would. So, she would let him leave without a fight, and hope he wouldn’t do his brother the disservice of turning his back on him.

It wasn’t even anything Sam had done in the past that made her feel this way. Her trust issues were earned when her own family turned their back on her years ago. Honestly, it’s just hard to turn something like that off.

“You need to be here when he wakes up Sam,” she scolded him one final time for good measure, because she just couldn’t help it. His emotions may have been high right now, but so were hers.

“I will be back in three days, I swear it, and then I will rent that apartment so that we will have somewhere to take him when he’s released until he can come home.”

Y/N nodded, but didn’t say anything, she was tired, so very tired, and didn’t have it in her to carry on this conversation any further.

In what felt like no time at all, the curtain drew back, and Rayne was standing there with an apologetic look on her face, ready to tell them it was time to leave.

“He likes that,” she said, looking at the monitor over Dean’s right shoulder behind where Y/N was standing.

“What?” she questioned, and the nurse smiled and pointed at the monitor.

“His heart rate, it lowered to a resting pace, It was slightly elevated when I walked you guys in here. I can see it on my computer at the desk. I was wondering what calmed him down, if it was just the medication or what, but apparently, he really likes it when you play with his hair.”

It was something she had been doing since she had walked in, and she hadn’t even really registered that she was still doing it, but when she looked down at him as she carded her fingers through his short hair again, he did look as if he was more relaxed than he did when she walked in. As much as she could tell anyway with all those tubes and things running from him.

“I wish I could stay here with him,” she admitted, and the nurse nodded sadly.

“In a few hours you can come back in and sit with him a little longer. Right now, he needs his rest,” she said. “I will keep a close eye on him, and if anything changes, I promise I will come and get you or call you.”

Y/N nodded as the pressure started to build behind her eyes, and she fought back tears that threatened to spill there in front of everyone. She had never felt this weak; this vulnerable, and she definitely didn’t like the fact that this was so out of her hands, and that there was nothing she could do to make this better for Dean; when in all honesty, she would have traded place with him in a heartbeat, she almost prayed it would have been her instead. She’d gladly take it all away for him. The pain, the battle to come, all of it.

She leaned down and pressed her lips to his forehead, lingering there longer than she should have, but she didn’t give a shit what anyone thought at this point. Sam leaned forward and placed his hand on top of Deans as well, giving it a squeeze as his hazel eyes took in Dean’s sleeping form.

“I’ll be back as soon as I can, and I’ll even try to get them to let me get Miracle in here to see you if you can wake up for me, okay? Just hang in there, man.”

The pair followed the nurse out into the waiting area again reluctantly, and Y/N did her best to stabilize her breathing as she settled on the couch that sat in the room. It wasn’t big, but she’d make due, because in two hours she could see Dean and that would be worth it.

“Go back to the motel Y/N, get some sleep, and then come back and see him.” Sam suggested as he adjusted his jacket, Dean’s keys gripped tightly in his hands.

“Na, I think I’ll stay here with him until I can see him again,” Y/N answered, and Sam tossed Dean’s keys to her.

“Here, he’s gonna want to know where his baby is when he wakes up, I can uh… hitch a ride, and be back here with my own car,” Sam said with a wink. “Let me know if anything changes, I’ll be back in two days.”

Without a word, she watched him leave. When she could no longer see him, Y/N looked at the clock, this was going to be a long two hours, but an even longer week. She needed to see his eyes again. She needed him awake. More than she needed oxygen.

There was a slight fear that when Dean woke up, he’d ask her to leave. Dean had never really shown her that he really cared for her much more than a fellow hunter. Other than that, Y/N was just another person standing in the room. The likelihood that he would wake up and dismiss her was greater than him asking her to say, no matter how much the nurse said he liked it when she played with his hair.

“Here,” a sudden voice made her startle, and she looked up to see Rayne standing over her with a blanket, and a pillow. “Try and get some sleep, I’ll come and wake you when it’s time to go see him again.”

“Thanks,” Y/N responded as she took the pillow and blanket from her. “Is he okay?”

“He’s stable,” she answered with a smile. “Which alone is a big step for someone who suffered such a bad injury.”

Y/N chewed on her lip as she thought about that for a moment, and Rayne turned to leave, she wasn’t going to ask, but she had to know, she just had too.

“Can he hear us, when we’re in there with him? Does he know what’s going on?” Y/N questioned, and the nurse stopped dead in her tracks, and turned around with her hand on the door frame as she thought about that for a moment.

“Medical Scientists and professionals will tell you no, they can’t hear you, that they are in a completely unconscious state, but I’ve been an ICU nurse for over 20 years, and I think they’re wrong. I’ve had patients be in comas for almost a month, to the point where we have to take the vent out and put a trache in to prevent infections and other complications; but when they woke up, they’d tell their loved ones about conversations they overheard, or songs that where played, or someone playing with their hair.”

Y/N nodded slowly, and looked down at the blanket that was still in her hands as she tried to process that information.

“The human mind is an amazing thing, just when we think we’ve got it figured out, someone comes along and proves us wrong. I've never seen someone with an injury as bad as Dean’s to survive the transport, let alone the surgery. I watched the physical response when you started to play with his hair. I think he might know you’re there, even if he can’t communicate it, or if he can’t remember it, I believe that he senses you.”

Y/N offered the nurse a smile and looked back down at the blanket, words failing her. She hoped she was right in a way, and she at least hoped Dean knew that he wasn’t alone. She may not have felt like she counted for much, but she was there for him, she’d be there until she was sent away, no matter how long it took; maybe one day, she’d get the nerve up to tell him how she really felt about him, but right now, she just wanted him to be okay.

“Get some sleep Mrs. Clearwater.”

“I’ll try.”

Forever:

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#carry on #dean winchester #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester fanfic #dean winchester series #spn fanfiction #spn series #dean winchester x reader #dean winchester x you #dean winchester x y/n #dean x reader #dean x you #dean x y/n #jawritter #jensen ackles

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dotthings · 2 years

Text

Catharsis is a very important part of storytelling. Watching 1.13 finally handed me the cathartic note I needed.

And it gave me Dean back and freed him from the narrative trap 15.20 left him in. Opened up on context and pov, used a different tone and execution and took a different route into Dean’s story. Without changing the plot tent poles. TW 1.13 is a transformative, recontextualized, and widened and deepened response. And I cried like I couldn’t with 15.20 and it was the cathartic kind of crying, it was joy and sadness. It was what 15.20 promised me it would be yet wasn’t, not for me, and I don’t think ever will be. Now it’s just a stumble in a longer, much bigger story, for Dean’s emotional journey, and for the spn universe.

THERE’S SO MUCH TO UNPACK HERE

So I’m going to be making a bunch of posts. Let me start with Dean.

So Dean makes it Heaven after the rebar, however he’s still full of sadness and regrets, about his own death about things left unsaid and the fates of himself and his closest people, and those relationships, and not just that, the cumulative sadness of his family’s tragic history, I think, hit him all at once there. TW has been about trauma all along and especially as a reflection on Dean’s trauma. We don’t have all the answers to all the mysteries so “why not rebar undo” is something that we should get answers on later. I was right about how important context is. This is only the beginning of the continuing story. We don’t have all the context on that so I’m sticking a pin in it and asking people to stay open-minded on how undoing that is not the only path out of the dark forest 15.20 left many of us in, I also don’t know what outcomes are going to be.

So Dean, restless and despairing and with his emotional journey not complete, decides if he can’t have his happy ending, he’ll find a universe where his family does. Since Chuck’s shitty drafts pretty much all implode and end up in destruction and even worse scenarios than spn prime, Dean HAS TO MAKE HIS OWN DRAFT.

HE TAKES CONTROL OF THE NARRATIVE.

This full on loudly acknowledged the immense sadness of the spn prime ending, in an spn universe show, and its sadness to Dean and that is also immensely cathartic. Jensen, being an EP and the spn universe boss rn, wants people to know, he gets it. While he doesn’t trash the finale on con stages, doesn’t mean he doesn’t understand.

I’m listening to what the story’s singing to me.

And we get more Dean pov and Dean’s story now. He’s got almost everyone he’s ever loved and instead of just driving around aimlessly for 40 years he finds a new mission, to protect the world of spn prime, where Sam’s trying to live a life. Of course he’s going to safeguard that, just like he went and made his own better draft in an AU world to give some version of his family and their found family a better chance. It’s a fundamental misunderstanding of Dean and who he is to reduce this to “did it all for Sam.” Of course he’s going to safeguard Sam, as he has since they were children. There are wider deeper reasons he did this. He didn’t do this just for Sam and everyone else he cares about on earth prime (& you can miss me pretending he wouldn’t care about safeguarding Garth’s family, or Jody and Donna’s), he also did this due to his own pain, his own hurt, his own need for comfort.

Dean matters. And there’s a whole PLOT here born from Dean acting on that sadness.

This next stage of his arc is just BEGINNING THIS IS JUST THE BEGINNING. Because while Dean’s viewpoint that if he can’t have a happy ending, everyone else will, Sam will have it, AU John and Mary will have it, is very Dean, him actually going around to other worlds to save people to others can be happy, is a way he copes, he still hasn’t addressed within himself his own need for a happy ending and that he can find one for himself. And no, that isn’t about Sam and Dean on the bridge.

What TW did here was acknowledge the Sam and Dean bond while it’s also showing how Dean can exist without Sam beside him, so long as he knows Sam is safe. This is not a hypothetical or speculation. That is what TW just showed us and that is really important for Dean’s arc. His people are important to him. But his trauma was never just about Sam. The reason he is the way he is about Sam isn’t about Sam, it’s about trauma. We’ve seen Dean hit those same points with his very closest people—over John, over Cas, over Sam, it’s reflection on how deep those relationships go it’s also a reflection on Dean. It’s about Dean. It’s about him and his big heart and his trauma and how he deal with loss and trauma.

Dean’s motivations may be to protect others, that’s part of who he is, that’s also—I feel like far too many people don’t stop to ask WHY. What makes Dean tick. There are different ways to react to loss, grief, or show love, why is Dean the way he is.

This is exactly what I needed to see, this kind of exploration of Dean after 15.20. No it’s not done yet, it’s not going to repair all the wounds all at once. So for those still hurting, I’m just going to beg them to remember this is just the start of a new stage of Dean’s story and the TW finale just blew his story wide open.

That 40 year gap.

We are in the [OMMITTED]

This is Dean’s story. I AM GOING TO START CRYING AGAIN.

#Dean Winchester #spnwin #spnwin meta #the winchesters #spnwin spoilers #dean meta

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sunshinepanic · 2 years

Text

Lie to me - Ch 02

Pairing: Dean Winchester x Reader

Summary: You and your best friend Dean drunkenly hook up.

Warnings: Uh-oh… unrequited/maybe requited, drinking, angst, smut

Word Count: 1,544

Sorry this has taken so fucking long. There is no excuse other than I’m just a shit person with a habit of being severely depressed. If you are still here thank you so much! If not I completely understand.

Not beta read we die like men.

Dean Winchester Masterlist - SPN Masterlist

Slamming the shot glass down on the bar he stared down at his phone. Scrolling through pictures of you, Sammy, and him together. His chest ached when he thought about how your face fell when he had told Sammy he was headed out. He wanted to ask you to come with him but you always turned him down. Sammy had sighed and tried for the millionth time to convince Dean you had feelings for him but Dean knew he was just a friend in your eyes, and screw Sam for trying to give him false hope. He downed another shot letting his mind wander to thoughts of you. He was startled when he felt someone’s fingers tickle up his arm. For a split second he hoped it was you but when he turned it was the curvy brunette that had been eyeing him out like a steak dinner since he had entered the bar. Normally he would smirk at her and throw out some bullshit line that would have her spreading her legs anywhere he asked her to but instead her touch made his skin crawl. He couldn’t get your face out of his head. He quickly shrugged her hand off mumbling an apology and took off towards the door.

Driving towards the bunker Deans hands clenched the steering wheel. Not sure what his plan was but he knew he couldn’t live like this anymore. When he pulled into the bunker his plan was to go to his room and sleep it off but as he walked down the hall he found himself outside your room.

He was going to walk away thinking you were already asleep but then he heard you moving around. His head told him to knock but before he realized what he was doing he had opened your bedroom door and was walking in.

You were standing there wearing nothing but his worn Led Zeppelin shirt chest heaving from being startled looking like every one of his wet dreams come to life. Your lips parted like you were about to say something but before you could Dean moved. Your back hit the wall and Deans lips crashed against yours.

He expected you to shove him away and he was braced for it but after a moment’s hesitation you moaned into his mouth and buried your hands in his hair pulling him closer. He ripped his flannel and shirt off as fast as he could while trying to keep your lips connected. Reaching down and grabbing your thighs he hoisted you up to wrap your legs around him. You instantly started grinding yourself against him as he carried you over to the bed. He gently laid you down on the bed his shirt riding up revealing your red silk panties. He had barely touched you and you were already soaked through.

Groaning at the sight he leaned down and placed a kiss on your core as he slid your underwear down your legs. He looked up at you from his spot between your legs. Your chest heaving, lips parted, beautiful Y/E/C blown wide like you couldn’t quite believe what you were seeing. He smirked up at you. “Is this alright sweetheart?” He asked as his hands slid back up your legs to cup your ass. Gulping you quickly nodded your head. “I need words baby girl.” You quickly moaned out a yes at his words. He pulled your legs over his shoulders as he licked a broad stripe up your core. You threw your head back moaning at the feeling of his tongue on your delicate folds. You struggled to keep your eyes locked on him not wanting to miss anything. Afraid this was all another one of your dreams. His fingers made their way to your entrance slowly filling you up. His thick fingers pumping in and out of you as he sucked on your clit was the best torture you could ever imagine. “You taste so fucking good sweetheart. Always knew you would be sweet. I need you to cum for me baby. Can you do that? Can you cum on my face? If you’re a good girl for me, and cum, I’ll give you my cock.” You were a moaning shaking mess between his fingers and tongue and the obscene filth coming from his gorgeous lips all you could do was moan and quickly nod your head. He smiled and dove back down with renewed vigor. Within minutes your legs clamped around his head as you shuddered through your orgasm riding it out on his tongue.

As soon as you unclenched your legs he slid up your body shoving his shirt up over your head to remove it. He kissed you like a man starved and before you knew what was happening you could feel him at your entrance. You didn’t even see him finish taking his clothes off. He slowly slid inside of you groaning at how good you felt wrapped around his cock. Your nails dug into his back pulling him as close as possible. Clinging onto him like he might disappear at any moment. He kissed you hard as he started thrusting. You could feel your orgasm nearing fast but then Dean stopped. You were confused but just as you opened your mouth to ask him what was wrong he rolled over startling you with your new position on top of him. You immediately felt self conscious as you looked down at the green eyed hunter. You moved to wrap your arms around yourself but Dean grabbed your hands. “Hey, don’t do that. Don’t try to cover up baby girl. You’re gorgeous.” He leaned up and kissed you “and so fucking sexy.” He placed a kiss on your throat. “I want you so bad baby girl.” He placed a kiss on your nipple. Moaning you grabbed onto his shoulders and slowly lowered yourself onto his cock. Dean groaned and you whined at how deep he felt inside you. You slowly started moving, Deans big hands guiding your hips while you ride him. Dean hands gripped your hips hard enough to leave bruises as he licked and sucked at your nipples. You could feel your orgasm building back up and started moving faster. “Are you going to cum for me baby? I can feel it. I want to feel you cum on my cock. Please baby girl cum for me. Make me cum inside this pretty little pussy.” You tipped your head back closing your eyes but Dean wrapped his hand around your throat. “Look at me baby girl. I want you to look at me while you cum. I wanna see you.” You opened your eyes and moaned as you locked eyes with Dean. You could feel yourself start to shake as your orgasm rolled through your body. You cling onto Dean and fought to keep eye contact. The feel of your orgasm clenching around Dean sent him into his own. He sped up his thrusts cumming deep inside you as you both moaned at the feeling. You finally let your eyes slip shut.

Dean wrapped his arms around you as he gently maneuvered you both down onto your sides. After getting you both into a comfortable position he whispered “Y/N are you ok? Was this alright?” But you didn’t answer. Your breathing was even and you were already fast asleep. Dean stared at your face thinking how beautiful you looked. He knew you guys needed to talk about everything but after tonight he had hope that he might actually get everything he ever wanted and maybe Sammy wasn’t wrong. He wrapped his arms around you and placed a kiss to your forehead before letting sleep take him under.

He wakes up slowly dreams of last night making him not want to wake up. He stretches his arm out searching for you but he finds the bed empty. He sits up, panic setting in, but he tries to hold it back. You probably just went to the kitchen for coffee. He quickly grabs his jeans and pulls them on. He can’t find his shirt from last night so he quickly shrugs on his flannel and does it up while walking out of your room. He is almost to the end of the hall when he hears Sam’s voice so he calls out to him. “Hey, Sammy have you seen Y/N?” When he rounds the corner he sees Sam helping you off the ground. Dean stops in his tracks taking stock of what he is seeing. You’re in sweats and his shirt and then he notices your wallet and car keys clutched in your hand like a death grip. His eyes travel to your tear streaked face and he can feel his throat close and his stomach bottom out. He clears his throat, “Sweetheart what’s wrong?” You shook your head and just mumbled out “I’m sorry.” As you turned and slid past Sam continuing on your way to the garage. Dean watched you go as he felt his heart crack inside his chest. Sam looked from the direction you went back to his brother. “Dean what’s going on? Is Y/N alright?” Dean snapped out of his daze and looked at Sam. “You were wrong Sam.”

Taglist: @m-winchester-67 @niffala @sammedeansandwhich @shinymoonstarfish

#jensen ackles #dean winchester #sam winchester #Jared padalecki #dean winchester angst #spn #supernatural #supernatural fanfic #supernatural fanfiction #Dean Winchester x reader #Dean Winchester x y/n #dean winchester fanfiction #Dean Winchester fanfic #writing #my writing #niko writes #mine #spn dean x reader #spn dean

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