#I think it would be so ironic and funny

[fluffishere]

One of my favorite American Psycho headcanons is (going with the idea that all of the murders were in his head and he never actually killed anyone): Imagine if Bateman faints at the sight of blood

[shootingstarrfish]

can we make belphebatos a thing /hj

based on these chat screenshots which i got from here!!!! thank you op <3

[scificrows]

Okay, my brain refuses to think about anything other than Murderbot, so I looked at every use of the word "friend[s]" in TMBD and... created some pie charts. Normal human activities.

Some Thoughts™ I had while putting this together (under the cut):

In All Systems Red, Murderbot notes that the PresAux crew are all close friends (twice! and goes on to explain their internal relationships which I think is very cute). This is pretty much the only use of 'friends' in ASR, except for when Murderbot says that SecUnits can't be friends with each other.

It seems that this may be one of the first times Murderbot has ever really been around a group of friends before? Murderbot notes that this is not the norm for its contracts and admits that the fact that they are all friends and the way they interact with each other make it actually enjoy that contract (before!!!! the hostile attack, so it already enjoys this contract before they start seeing it as a person etc ghghhhh). [Inference: Friendship seems enjoyable.]

The first character that calls Murderbot its friend is ART in Artificial Condition. Murderbot immediately refutes this (and then goes on to call ART its friend to its clients for the rest of the book). [Inference: Maybe ART is Murderbot's friend. And maybe that is... agreeable]

Rogue Protocol has more than twice as many instances of the word 'friend' as any of the other novellas. Why? Miki. Friendship and its implications for non-humans are a central theme because Miki is friends with everyone. Murderbot initially scoffs at the notion that Miki and Miki's humans are friends. At the end of the book, after witnessing how desperately Don Abene tried to stop Miki from trying to save them, and her grief after its death, Murderbot has to admit that she had in fact been Miki's friend. [Inference: Humans can be friends with bots and can sincerely care about them]

In Exit Strategy, Murderbot tentatively uses the word "friends" for its humans for the first time (several times actually). It questions whether it can actually call them its friends or not and later realizes that it had been afraid what admitting that the humans are its friends would do to it. At the end of the book, Mensah tells Murderbot the PresAux crew are its friends, which is the first time a human has directly said that to it (at least on-page). [Inference: Humans can and want to be Murderbot's friends]

In Network Effect, Murderbot seems to be more habituated to the word 'friend', confidently calling ART and Ratthi its friends, like it is no longer just trying the concept on unsure if it fits. There are many instances in which other characters refer to MB as ART's friend or the other way around and Murderbot's humans refer to Murderbot as their friend several times. Generally, there seems to be less hesitancy, because yes, all of them are Murderbot's friends, why wouldn't they be. [Inference: SecUnits can have friends. This SecUnit has friends. They care about it a lot.]

Conclusion: The Murderbot Diaries tell the story of a construct that does not seem to consider the possibility of friendship for itself and is fine with that - until it accidentally starts caring a little too much and suddenly more and more people annex it as a friend (ew) to the point where it can no longer deny that this is happening and has to begrudgingly admit that yes, it has friends now and maybe that is actually not a bad thing.

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Happy very belated birthday.. I hope you had much time celebrating by digging for tubers : )

I'M DIGGING FOR TUBERS! AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME!

[gaylactic-fire]

That TERF from yesterday still has a chokehold on me bc her "Link is a cisgender butch lesbian and everyone in Hyrule just thinks she's a guy" HC has got to be the most ironic "babe you're so close" ass headcanon I've ever heard.

So Link is a butch lesbian who is misgendered by everyone in Hyrule (including Zelda for some reason, if we are to take this as canon like OP suggests), to point where she's literally been labelled as the legendary swordsMAN and even the Gerudo can't tell she's a woman until she puts on more traditionally feminine attire. Link doesn't even put particular effort into appearing masculine, but everyone in Hyrule still just can't fathom her being a woman, because her presentation is not "feminine enough" to be considered one.

HMMMMMM gee golly gosh I wonder... I do wonder if another group of vulnerable individuals might empathise with Link's plight here?... gee whizz 😳

[hadesknockedupintheunderworld]

Insane again thinking about Sonic and Tails

Everyone always talks about the ways in which Tails is dependent on or revolves around Sonic. We talk about the ways in which he's depended on Sonic to save him, the way he likes tagging along on journeys, the way Sonic has inspired him, the way he always maintains Sonic's plane, leaves his door open for him with place to rest and good food to eat

But we rarely talk about the ways in which Sonic is secretly dependent or reliant on Tails

In a large portion of the games, if Tails isn't straight up on the journey alongside him, Sonic has the security that Tails can communicate with him from afar, and Tails usually appears to help out at some point during one of Sonic’s solo journeys. He doesn't have to be without Tails for long

And we see what happens (especially in Sonic Frontiers and Sonic Prime) when Tails is inaccessible. In Frontiers, he wonders where Tails aloud is unprompted, wanting to find him. Sonic's other friends even convince him to bother with the secrets of the starfall islands because doing so may lead him to Tails. He wants to find Tails so Tails can make sense of what's happening. And in Prime, Sonic ends up scrambling without Tails around. Especially in Prime S1 while things make the least sense, he seeks out Tails first (and then later hopes variants other than Nine can fill Tails' role) because he trusts him. He trusts that if Tails is here, then he can just tell Sonic what to do (come up with a plan for him to execute). With Tails around, Sonic doesn’t have to worry about not understanding the situation because Tails can figure it out. Without Tails, Prime!Sonic often shifts between trying to handle things himself to the best of his knowledge while rolling with the punches, and deferring to someone he can trust as a smarter strategizer to tell him what to do (a role Nine fills most notably, but other characters such as Rebel and Shadow fill on the occasion).

Of course there's also the earlier mentioned way in which Tails takes care of Sonic as well. I'm sure Tails isn't Sonic's only friend that he could crash with, but it's Tails who goes to such lengths to open his arms for him. If Sonic wants to crash in an actual house, if he wants to eat his favorite food, if he just wants to hang out, or if he needs help, Tails's home is open to him, accommodating his every need.

In my eyes, Sonic is the one who is surprisingly codependent here, who flounders a bit when everything goes to shit, Tails is nowhere to be found and can't be contacted, and there's no one else that can help him make sense of things. He takes Tails with him on so many journeys, even in games like Colors, where Tails largely follows behind Sonic while Sonic does a lot of the physical work. Tails doesn't need to be "useful" to tag along. He likes having Tails around, he wants Tails around. When Tails can't go with him or it's something Sonic should go alone for, he can always communicate with him and hear his voice from afar. And I'd argue there are more examples than Sonic Prime that may demonstrate Sonic trying to find someone to fill Tails' role the first chance he can get when Tails isn't around and can't be contacted.

The conclusion here is that a lot of people talk about Tails being dependent on Sonic or revolving around him, but they truly are partners. Sonic wants to be around Tails at this point perhaps as much as Tails always wants to be around Sonic. The two are strong together, they fill each other's gaps in ability. They both feel more secure when the other is around, and they rely on each other's presence. They are each a comforting existence to the other in similar and different ways.

[zzypher]

A Comprehensive Analysis of "NoseGate" - An Essay by Ivy Lynnwood

Workplace harassment - it is just one of the many rampant, yet little discussed issues that plague the American workplace. According to the article, "Workplace Harassment Statistics in 2023," "20% of American workers have been victims of workplace bullying (up from 14% in 2022)." Workplace harassment can come in a variety of forms including, "...verbal abuse, offensive conduct or behaviors, work sabotage, undermining work performance, and inappropriate use of power or authority (Setyan, 2023)." With workplace harassment being such a taboo topic, one would typically be hard-pressed to find examples of it in media... that is until stumbling upon the 2022 Adult Swim animated comedy, Smiling Friends. Season Two's eighth episode, "The Magical Red Jewel AKA Tyler Gets Fired," is a masterful depiction of workplace harassment, and it's various effects. Within the episode, protagonists Charlie Dompler and Allan Red hash out a past incident that had been haunting Charlie for a number of months. The following essay is not for the purpose of stating who is in the wrong, but rather to lay out what canonically happened in order for the reader to come to their own conclusions.

Where it All Began

In Season Two's episode, "The Magical Red Jewel AKA Tyler Gets Fired," Allan and Charlie are tasked with the important job of babysitting Mr. Boss' 18 year old son, Jason. Later on, while watching Jason in Mr. Boss' office, Allan remarks, "You know, it's weird we don't really hang out one-on-one much, do we?" to which Charlie replies, "Yeah, yeah, it's definitely been awhile uhm... I don't know if you remember this or not, but the last time we hung out, like, you and I, you actually sucked on my nose, so..." Charlie's statement references a scene from the series' pilot episode, "Desmond's Big Day Out," in which Allan does, in fact, suck on Charlie's nose. However, is Charlie's framing of the incident truly accurate to what happened? A full analysis of the scene is needed in order to fully understand each character's actions and motivations.

The above image is from a scene from the ending of, "Desmond's Big Day Out." This takes place after Allan remarks, "Yes, and I got my cheese back...nom," to which Charlie replies, "Aw, come here Allan, you crazy character," after pulling Allan into a friendly embrace and tracing his hand with his finger.

Allan then proceeds to commit the very act that has haunted Charlie throughout Season One and Most of Season Two: nose sucking.

Afterwards, Charlie can be seen pushing Allan away. The two then laugh together.

Allan then tries to suck on Charlie's nose a second time, to which Charlie backs away.

Charlie and Allan laugh it off a second time. Then Allan exclaims, "Nom," again, however this time, he does not try to lean in and suck Charlie's nose. It can be inferred that Allan had learned by that point that his actions were making Charlie uncomfortable, which is why he chose to stop.

It is important to note that Charlie was the one who placed his hands on the other first. We do not know if whether or not Allan was uncomfortable with Charlie touching him, as he does not say anything or make any gestures that can be interpreted as discomfort. Regardless, this could already be counted as misconduct, as it can be argued that he should not have touched Allan to begin with, especially within their workplace. Allan's act of sucking Charlie's nose in response will come off as confusing to most audiences. It could be seen as a form of Allan playfully reciprocating Charlie's initial gesture, as Allan is often depicted as an individual with many quirks. However, it is also important to consider that we do not know the full extent of critter culture and social customs. While Allan's nose sucking can be seen as friendly and playful, it could very well have been Allan expressing his distaste towards Charlie's actions, or some other unknown emotion. Overall, Allan's true intentions behind sucking Charlie's nose are unknown, however it is obvious that Charlie was uncomfortable with that, but this should not disqualify the fact that Charlie touched Allan first.

Present Day

Nearly two entire seasons later in, "The Magical Red Jewel AKA Tyler Gets Fired," the aforementioned event of Allan sucking Charlie's nose is brought up again. Charlie claims that it was necessary to, "...hash it out..." so they, "...can hang out more..."

Allan, upon being confronted by Charlie for his actions, replies in a shocked tone, "What? I don't remember doing that." Whether or not Allan was telling the truth in this statement is unknown, however, evidence suggests that this may very well be the truth. In "Desmond's Big Day Out," before the encounter between the two, Allan was attacked and crucified by an army of bliblies, which had infested the Smiling Friends office.

According to an article by Harbor Psychiatry and Mental Health, "Traumatic experiences can have a profound effect on memory function, often leading to memory loss as a coping mechanism...This impairment can stem from physical or emotional trauma, with memory loss serving as the brain's way of processing and managing the experience (Harbor Mental Health, 2023)." The physical and emotional damage that Allan suffered from that day was certainly enough to result in memory loss, especially in terms of a short-lived interaction that took place not too long after the main event. For Charlie, that day was rather normal, considering that he mainly spent his day out of the office doing his job, so he is much more likely to remember such an interaction.

Despite Allan's lack of memory of the initial interaction, he is clearly distraught by what he had done in the past.

It is clear in his facial expressions (see above image), body language, and tone of voice that he clearly regrets his actions and the distress that he has caused Charlie. After Charlie explains what had happened, that fateful day, Allan responds with, "Sure, I- I honestly don't remember doing that but- well, yeah, if I did, I'm sorry. I just don't remember doing that but it sounded like it really bothered you." An interesting thing to note is how, during Allan's attempt at an apology, Charlie interrupts him to remark that the incident had happened "recently," however, the event had taken place before both Halloween episodes, suggesting that well over a year had passed in-universe. Whether or not this is a case of Charlie misremembering the incident, or just being so distraught by it that it felt more recent that it truly was is up to interpretation.

So Charlie finally admits his feelings about the incident and Allan gives a decent apology in return. The logical next step would be to just move on and allow time to heal any remaining wounds, right? Unless...

Present Day Part Two: The (Temporary) Death of Jason

During Charlie and Allan's confrontation, Jason suddenly screams, then dies immediately afterwards.

Charlie begins to search Mr. Boss' desk for anything that might help, then momentarily gets distracted by Mr. Boss' manifesto. Allan tries to calm Charlie down and says, "Charlie, there is nothing we can do." Charlie, undeterred, attempts to perform CPR on Jason (in an incorrect fashion). Charlie accepts defeat, and Allan replies, "Yeah, I already told you that."

Later on, Charlie and Allan try to get Glep to pretend to be Jason for the rest of his life in order to avoid the inevitable consequences. Glep eventually becomes fed up with the situation and leaves. Allan says, sarcastically, "Great idea, Charlie," to which Charlie responds, "At least I'm trying to think of stuff, man!"

Allan argues, "Well, maybe if you weren't talking my damn ear off we would have noticed something was wrong with him in the first place!"

Allan's argument begs an important question: would they have even noticed something was wrong with Jason had they not been arguing previously? Mr. Boss states at the beginning of that episode that Jason is "super low maintenance," and that if he were to need something, he would let them know. In the scenes following up to his death, Jason doesn't give any sort of major signal that something was wrong. He simply sat there, as he typically does. Jason dies immediately after screaming, so there was no time for Charlie and Allan to help him. It could be argued that Charlie did technically try to help Jason, however this was after he died. Allan recognized that Jason was dead and did nothing because there is simply nothing that could have been done.

Back to the argument, Charlie exclaims, "Woah, woah, this is not my fault, dude. You were the one that was on the phone the whole time and you were not paying any attention at any point!"

While Allan was on his phone previously, he was technically paying at least some attention to Jason, as he says early on, "Is it supposed to be doing that?" in response to Jason breathing noisily. Charlie responds to this with, "Yeah, that's like his whole shtick." It should be noted that Jason does not make this heavy breathing sound in any of his other appearances, which means that this could very well have been a sign, albeit a very subtle one, that something was wrong. Allan was the one to question this behavior, and Charlie thought nothing of it. It should also be noted that Charlie shifts all of the blame onto Allan, suggesting that Jason died because he wasn't paying any attention. But what was Charlie doing at that time? Wasn't he also not paying attention? Why doesn't he take any responsibility, considering that he agreed to help watch Jason?

Allan goes on to argue, "Fuck you, I was checking work emails, you yellow son of a bitch!" with this insult implying racism. This is not the first time Allan has engaged in such behavior, as is shown in the episode, "A Allan Adventure," in which he calls Armzo, a critter with several arms, "spider." Whether or not Allan truly feels this way about other critters is unknown, as he very well could have just been frustrated. However, one could argue that in these modern times, there really is no good reason to insult someone based on race or appearance, and that Allan's insults were just terribly "low hanging fruit."

Onto the physical portions of the altercation! Allan and Charlie begin arguing back and forth over who killed Jason. Allan is the first to make things physical, by slapping Charlie's hand. Charlie understandingly responds by slapping him back in a similar fashion.

After various kicks and punches from both sides, Allan once again reaches for low hanging fruit and punches Charlie in the nose, a spot that he had previously established as a place he would rather not have touched.

Charlie responds to this by attempting to choke Allan. While Charlie seemingly won the (physical) fight in the end, it can be argued that his win was not a fair one. While Allan did punch Charlie's nose, he did not try to full on kill him. However, it is also unclear if Charlie's true intent was to ultimately choke Allan to death, or to simply give him the illusion that he was going to do so.

The Verdict

Allan and Charlie would ultimately end up confessing that Jason died while in their care, and then embrace each other once he was revived by the magical red jewel. At this point, it is safe to say that they have put aside their differences for the common good of Jason, and perhaps have even made up (though it remains unclear if there was any forgiveness on either side). However, there is a fairly good chance that none of these events would have had to happen had Charlie and Allan been educated on proper workplace conduct. It is truly horrifying how such a small gesture can ultimately progress into such catastrophic, and even fatal, events. The story of Charlie and Allan proves that workplace harassment is no laughing matter, and that we as a society need to improve upon how we conduct ourselves in public environments, as well as work towards establishing rules that can help to keep ourselves and others safe. So next time you find yourself thinking about sucking your coworker's nose, remember Charlie and Allan, and think twice about your potential actions.

Sources:

Setyan Law - Workplace Harassment Statistics in 2023

Harbor Mental Health - Does Trauma Cause Memory Loss?

[starcurtain]

Outing myself as a Genshin rarepair lover just to say that what I love best about Diluven isn't the "boy and his god" dynamic (though that is very good, chef's kiss yes yes)--what I love most is that both Diluc and Venti (literally, in Venti's case) are characters shaped by their grief, characters who have responded to loss in different and yet equally unhealthy ways.

Venti hides his grief behind a light-hearted veneer, using laughter and antics to dissuade people from taking him--and the things he's experienced--too seriously. He asserts a carefree (sometimes careless) exterior while internally hiding away the pain of his personal losses and the immense pressure of being an archon.

Diluc is the complete opposite. By all accounts, he used to be a happy child, but he's allowed his grief to completely reshape his external self, from a boy who smiled all the time to a quiet, brooding young man who feels best fit for the dark of night. Diluc carries his loss and his deep sense of atonement outside himself for everyone who knows his past to see. It's a weight he can't let go of and doesn't even try to hide.

But who better to help you heal than the person who has faced the same kind of suffering and chosen a different path?

Through Venti, Diluc can learn that a legacy of loss does not have to mean sacrificing joy and companionship in the present; that letting yourself freely express happiness here-and-now isn't a betrayal to the memory of those who are gone.

Through Diluc, Venti can learn that there's no shame to showing one's sadness nor selfishness in sorrow; that you aren't ignoring what was gained by mourning what was lost--that no one will begrudge their god for the times he doesn't feel like singing.

Until until, one day:

A Diluc with reasons to smile unreservedly.

A Venti with someone to sit beside his silence.

So yes, it's about a boy and his god. But also: it's about two people who have experienced the same profound grief and who both, in their own ways, are the exact type to soldier on under the burden of their duties to Mondstadt at deep cost to themselves.

It's about healing your mirror in order to heal yourself, and it doesn't get any better than that.

Like goddamn, what a dynamic.

[aq2003]

omfg . radio play version of much ado with david as benedick from 2001

[batsplat]

following on from this. not to always bring marc into everything (sorry marc) but if assen 2015 had happened against jorge, valentino would have very likely pulled something similar again imo. rather than what he actually did, which is approach marc almost immediately for a nice normal friendly handshake and backing off during the podium celebrations. should be noted that during laguna seca '08, valentino was very much committed to yapping at casey on the podium with the world's biggest smuggest grin on his face

partly that disparity is because jorge not marc was the direct title rival, partly it's because valentino was treating marc with kid gloves right until the second that he wasn't, which marc was seemingly entirely oblivious to. if anyone other than marc had said what he said in that presser, had then continued on with similar rhetoric during sachsenring, valentino would quite likely have gone nuclear. he's done it over less than that. his fondness for marc made him continue to exhibit uncharacteristic restraint... except that fondness unfortunately is what left valentino feeling so very betrayed when (to his eyes) marc could not leave well enough alone

[wonder-worker]

"It is too easy to dismiss [Leonor of Navarre] as an overambitious schemer who would do anything to obtain a crown, shedding the blood of her own siblings and her subjects in order to attain the throne. However, a deeper investigation of her long lieutenancy and ephemeral reign shows a woman who fought tenaciously to preserve her place but also worked tirelessly to administer a realm which was crippled by internal conflict and the center of the political schemes of France, Aragon, and Castile. She tried to broker peace, fight off those who opposed her, repair the wounds caused by conflict, protect the sovereignty of the realm, and keep the wheels of governance turning. Leonor was not always successful in achieving all of these aims but given the background of conflict and the lack of cooperation she received from all of her family members, bar her loyal husband, it is a huge achievement that she survived to wear the crown at all. Many writers have argued that Leonor deserved the troubled lieutenancy, personal tragedies, an ephemeral reign, and a blackened reputation, basing their assumption that she committed a crime that cannot be [conclusively] proven. However, a more fitting description of her would be that of a resolute ruler who successfully overcame a multitude of challenges in order to survive in a difficult political landscape and gain a hard-fought throne.”

-Elena Woodacre, "Leonor of Navarre: The Price of Ambition", Queenship, Gender and Reputation in the Medieval and Early Modern West, 1060-1600 (Edited by Zita Eva Rohr and Lisa Benz)

[uncanny-tranny]

I guess it's cool that I'm being served queer tinder ads but do they know they're wasting money on me...

The lights are on but nobody's home 💀💀💀

[nopecho]

Thinking about a DoL x Heathers Musical crossover

Ughhhhh

[djevelbl]

Do you perchance have or want to yap about cup head... (Totally not desperate for cup content trust) :3

Random thought, but I wholeheartedly believe that if the stars aligned, he was in a rage-induced blackout & he had his younger self in front of him, Inky Mystery Cuphead would in fact kill him on sight and without hesitation.

Like think about it: he has absolutely NO forgiveness for himself, and even in the latest chapters he STILL doesn't understand that he was a CHILD and thus not even mature enough for a decision like BETTING HIS SOUL??? so much so that back in the Labyrinth (sigh. one day we'll stop talking about this one I swear) & in his dream-prison-thingie the past decade hadn't even happened — if it was up to him, who he is today would be long dead, buried on the Isles probably

So. He'd probably kill his younger self if he could — out of jealousy? Out of anger? idk, I just really really think he would

[science-lings]

I think Tumblr ate my last one so here.

Tis your sign to ramble to thine hearts content

I've been saving these until I have thought about something in particular to ramble about so get ready,

I am obsessed with the vibe of the Wright's being born performers. Before choosing to pursue law, Phoenix was an art student, implied to either be pursuing illustration or Shakespearian theater. I like to think that part of the appeal of criminal law for him was how dramatized everything was. It's more about weaving a story that connects all the dots provided for the evidence and witness statements than about, you know, knowledge of the law. It's about plot twists and last-minute saves and becoming the sturdy pillar for your client. Phoenix only chooses cases that are so wacky and hopeless that make for excellent stories. What I'm saying is that Phoenix lives for the drama and how the courtroom turns into a stage where he has to convince everyone else of the story he's piecing together that very moment. There's just something so theatric about yelling 'objection' and slamming the desk and making some improvised quips to taunt the guy you're arguing against.

I'm also of the opinion that the whole Beanix persona was originally intended to be more of a character that Phoenix put up to get Kristoph to believe that he had given up. It's clear that it was all about hiding his true thoughts and his identity from anyone who would recognize his spikey hair and wiggly eyebrows. He deliberately stopped wearing his iconic blue and general business casual getup and you cannot tell me that there wasn't so much thought into how he started to present himself. He's known for being highly saturated and spikey and generally pretty emotionally open so this character he built is the exact opposite of all those things and it's totally on purpose.

And just like Trucy, this character performance is a coping mechanism to keep themselves safe and seemingly confident. They both smile so convincingly and refuse to let anyone know if something is wrong. They're both manipulative but not out of malice, out of need for survival. They've both been on the wrong side of public opinion and in some capacity are aware that they're in the crosshairs of someone incredibly dangerous. They can only try to keep each other safe by playing into the act that they've worked on for years.

So sure they have to hide their true feelings under a quirky guise, but also I think they would join a community theater and be so good at it. They're in musicals together, I think Phoenix can sing, and he can sing well. He was in all his school plays and got so good at projecting his voice that they didn't even need to give him a mic (me core). That's what made him so good at objecting. I think that the ace attorney stage plays should be canon in the aa universe and Phoenix should play himself and he gets Trucy to play Pearl. He accidentally has so much homoerotic tension with the guy who plays Edgeworth that the real Edgeworth gets jealous.

Phoenix should also know about a lot of technical stuff that comes with theater, so he does a lot of the setup for lights and audio for Trucy's magic shows, he helps her move props around and should be so involved because I think that would be fun.

I also think he should know enough magic that she sometimes incorporates him into the act around their friends, so she makes a card disappear and Phoenix pulls the same one out of Edgeworth's ear. I love it when they're concerningly in sync and they can basically read each other's minds. They stare at each other and have fully silent conversations.

[dennisboobs]

people will just say anything