#I was so happy it had all my song progress and most importantly it had my FAVORITE CARD OF WLL TIME

[meowkid1000]

YEAAAAAAHHHH MY BANG DREAM ACCOUNT WASNT GONE FOREVER ‼️‼️‼️‼️

[j0kers-light]

I am not sure if your requests are open but was wondering if you would do a smut one-shot where y/n and joker dress up like their getting married maybe it's y/ns weird fetish or jokers but it is one of thems idea that's up to you

[Most importantly hope you don't mind this but the joker isn't wearing any makeup in this]

Ps. Love his lighthouse love it

His Lighthouse: A White Future (LedgerJoker x f!reader)

A White Future - Oneshot

KEEP IN MIND THIS IS NOT A STORY UPDATE!

Hey hi @jokerslittlepage 🖤✨please excuse me for taking so long in writing this! This one was tricky to write I'm not gonna lie… I feel like Joker is a little OOC in it since I mostly head canon his against marriage but hey. I did what needed to be done. Please don’t hate me!! 🥹🥹 and at this point Joker rarely wears his clown makeup around Y/n so you’re all good beloved!

Enjoy as I post this in the dark at 1AM!

— Oh and this is definitely not possibly canon with His Lighthouse. You'll understand after reading lol 🤭

Also I'm kinda feeling this song playing in the background as Joker and Y/n dance on the balcony. Its soft and gentle enough yet angst for this ill fated couple 😘

taglist:

@blackreaderatrisk @twinkledinkle @clemdango04 @l3ejm @tears-of-amber @what-an-angel @darthjokerisyourfather @thatsnoteii @dollster @cheetahspy @kaidennnnn @urdariingdoll @motivation-idontknowher

Wanna be included in the His Lighthouse journey? Join the taglist!

Joker blamed you for this.

You unlocked another one of his weird fetishes that he never would have known existed, all completely by accident.

You were cleaning out the closet in the guest bedroom and trying on things to see if they still fit. If it didn't, you were donating it.

Joker had returned from a late night meeting at the main hideout and was relaxing on the bed, still dressed in this three piece suit. This one was all black, giving off mafia vibes, especially since he proudly wore the gold chain you bought him around his neck.

Your initials were on a small charm hanging from it. It was a subtle way for Joker to acknowledge his girl; he never took it off.

Joker washed his clown makeup off in the bathroom and was content watching the strip tease and mini fashion show you were putting on. So far he kept his hands to himself.

No surprise Joker was a great judge with his killer fashion sense. He was honest about the things you tried on.

"It's a no for meee."

"Wait, Bunny! Keep that one. It makes your hips look... mmm. C'mere pretty thing.."

"I dunno.. bell bottoms are making a uhhh comeback. I like the color, doll."

"Don't even try that on. Toss it."

"Y/n, what possessed you to buy that?"

Rude comments and all, you were making progress with Joker's help! You had almost everything cleared out and ready to either return back into the closet or in bins for charity, that is, until you squealed and dug out a white garment bag.

"I forgot about this!" You laid the bag out on the nearby couch and unzipped it.

Joker lifted his head at the sound and watched you eagerly lift up a dress. From here it looked cream or was it white? He spoke up to ask. "What's that, bunny?"

He missed your megawatt smile. "One of my fans invited me to her all white wedding before you and I met. She asked me to be her bridesmaid and I totally forgot I kept the dress!"

You held it up to your body and faced the mirror. She was so happy you made it and they were such a beautiful couple. You were glad you made her day even more special by being there. You smiled while reminiscing fond memories.

You turned just enough for J to finally see that garment in its entirety and his brain swiftly short circuited.

"Put it on."

You turned towards Joker. "Huh?"

He had this hazy look in his eyes as he watched you stand before the mirror. The urge to see you in white struck him hard and fast. He didn't know why.

"I said.. Put. It. On."

You knew that tone very well and scrambled to do what Joker said before he lost patience.

You took off your bra and shimmied into the cool satin material. The panty line was too harsh in the white fabric so without thinking, you peeled off your panties and tossed them aside.

Joker swallowed audibly watching them go. He liked that pair very much. However they looked better on the floor.

"Can you zip and button me up?" You held the front of the dress up to your breasts and moved your hair back for him.

Joker took in a shaky breath. The dress wasn't even on properly and he was already having impure thoughts. The ivory color against your darker skin just made it pop even more. You tried on countless articles of clothing tonight but this was the icing on the cake. He stood up from the bed and walked over to you.

His green eyes met your e/c ones in the mirror before you looked away, hiding your flushed cheeks. For once he didn't comment on your skittish behavior.

He reached out and pulled the zipper up, letting his fingers brush against your skin like a feather.

The intimate gesture sent shivers down your spine.

Joker was so close you could feel his body heat on your exposed skin and his hands were like a branding iron buttoning the two pearls at your neck. When he was done, Joker rested his hands on your shoulder and spoke to your reflection.

"You ahhh need heels." He whispered on your neck.

You didn't understand where he was going with this. You weren't trying on full outfits, just the clothing itself.

Joker rolled his eyes when you didn't move and stalked over to your endless pile of heels for himself. He flung a few to the side and mumbled under his breath when he couldn't find the ones he was looking for.

"J what are you doing?" You walked over barefoot but jumped when J laughed after finding the perfect pair. He wordlessly pointed for you to sit down.

Thank goodness a chair was nearby. Joker meant business when he didn't speak. You flopped down in your sage accent chair and waited for the lion to stalk its prey.

You were speechless when Joker got down on his knees to put a pair of Tom Ford stilettos on your dainty feet. They were the same pair he gifted you recently. He swore he purchased them with real money.

Like you actually believed him.

Regardless if he obtained them legally or not, they made your skin tone pop even more and highlighted the stark white of the bridesmaid dress.

You wore clear heels to the wedding but Joker was in charge here. Only the best for his Light.

"There... perfect." He whispered more to himself than you. His green eyes snapped up to you. Joker's hands were rubbing your calves but they slowly creeped up under the gown to caress your thighs. "A vision in white."

From the halter neck to the draped bodice, you were a sight to behold. This gown, what it represented, was doing things to him. His Light bathed in white whereas he was swallowed in darkness.

Yin and yang. The two of you were polar opposites and he absolutely loved it.

"A-Alrighty.. um it still fits! So um... can I take this dress off now?" You asked with a shaky breath. Green eyes pinned you down further into the seat as Joker's lips inched closer and closer to yours.

"NoPe. It's our big day and you look... phenomenal. You look so heavenly.. n' all for me." Joker tucked a wayward curl of hair back behind your ear.

His words made your eyes widen. Big day? What was he going on about?

"J.. what're you..?"

"Stay right here, doll. Don't. Move." He ordered. He grinned at you before backing away and leaving the room altogether.

You blinked in shock but did as you were told.

Just what had gotten into Joker and where did he go? It was taking him longer than a minute to return.

You tapped your heels on the floor as you waited.

He came back with your fresh bouquet of flowers that you always kept on display in the foyer. This week it was a hodgepodge of wildflowers mixed in with chrysanthemums and snapdragons; the perfect wedding arrangement. You finally had an understanding of what was going on here.

"Did you know it's considered bad luck for the groom to see the bride before the wedding?" You accepted the fresh flora and discreetly shook off the excess water from the stems before it soaked into your satin dress.

Joker just shrugged and helped you to your feet. He kissed your cheek and led you out of the bedroom. "Who needs luck when I have you?"

Now that was sweet.

You bowed your head and let Joker guide you out onto the balcony. He walked you out just like a newlywed couple to the reception.

The night was balmy and the distant lights from the Fashion District cast a neon glow on everything. Joker stepped away to turn on the patio's string of lights to soften things up a bit.

They came on and illuminated you in a warm intimate glow. You were missing a veil for this to truly be a dream come true. Joker would just have to go without. Your smile monopolized all of his attention anyways.

You shined brightly just like the lighthouse he named you after. You laughed when Joker bowed and offered you his hand, like a true gentleman.

You both knew he was anything but.

"May I have this uhh, dance?"

Joker's smile was genuine and without his signature makeup, he looked dazzling under the twinkling lights.

You could stare at J for hours. You didn't care about his scars. Yes, they made him into the fearsome man he was, but in your opinion, Joker was beyond stunning no matter how you looked at him.

How could you say no to such a handsome man?

With your bouquet in one hand– you gave Joker the other as he swept you up into a ballroom waltz right there on the balcony.

You heard gentle music playing from the speakers and knew this must've been what he ran off to prepare.

"But you don't plan things.." You mumbled under your breath.

Joker kissed your cheek to silence his laugh. You loved pointing out his affinity for structure and plans.

The two of you danced along to the soft music and stared into each other's eyes. Yours were more bashful whereas Joker did nothing to hide his desire. The grip he had on your hip clenched tighter when you bit your lip. It wasn't unusual for Joker to get handsy but your curiosity got the better of you at the origin of his passion.

"So... um you're not gonna tell me what brought this on?"

He scoffed as if you should've already known the answer. "Do I need an excuse to dance with my wife?" Joker dipped you suddenly.

You were sputtering and gaping like a fish. "W-Whahh? Wife?" He slowly straightened you back up.

"Do play along, Y/n." Joker said with an eye roll.

"Oh I'm sorry Joker! I didn't know we were roleplaying tonight. I was trying on clothes and you went all... thison me! How was I supposed to know you had a bridal fetish or whatever this is? I bet you wanna skip straight to the honeymoon anyways."

You looked away and missed Joker's licking his scars in agitation. You knew the exact buttons to press with him, it was infuriating.

The scene was set. Why couldn't you just play along?

Joker spun you again but this time he jerked you roughly so your back was against his chest. He kept you steady on your feet with his strong grip.

"I.... didn't know I had one until you found this... this... dress. White looks soo... ethereal on you my Light. So what if I wanna end our uhhh re-cep-tion early and consummate our bond. Hmm? Are ya gonna stop me? We both know that's what you wanT."

Joker leaned down to whisper in your ear. "You wanted me since the moment I came home."

That may be true, but he didn't have to call you out on it!

That matte black suit of his was equal parts sinful and alluring plus you really wanted that gold chain of his swinging in your face tonight.. An airy moan slipped out before you could stop it.

How did he know your body better than you?!

Joker ran his hand down the front of your dress and bunched the satin material up until your legs were bare to his touch. The humid air teased your bare sex, making you shiver.

"I bet you're thinking about it.. righT now, aren't ya? Let's see just how needy my wife is..." 

Without warning, Joker plunged his fingers into your wet pussy. You clutched onto his forearms and gasped at the intrusion.

"Told ya, princess.. you're sopping wet for me." He groaned at hearing your wet lips gush out as he thrusted them deeper inside. Your eyes fluttered half mast but flew back open in fear.

You looked left and right, hoping it was dark enough for your neighbors to not witness what was going on your balcony.

Just because you owned the penthouse didn't mean there weren't other buildings surrounding yours. Gotham City was notorious for peeping toms and noisy neighbors.

"J-J... my mmph!" Your complaint fizzled away when Joker's thumb rubbed at your clit. Why did you take your panties off around this man?

J loves when you wear dresses and skirts for 'easy access' and for good reason.

The man was a sorcerer with his fingers and you loved when he worked his magic. He curled them just so and had you hurling straight to the cusp of pleasure in record time.

You were wet the moment he walked in the bedroom but he didn't need to know that. Joker knew his tailored suits turned you on.

Finally getting some much needed stimulation was sending you over the edge. You clawed at J's arms as the heat threatened to consume you entirely.

A flick of his thumb against your bundle of nerves and you were moaning out in ecstasy.

You made a mess of his fingers right there for anyone to see if they looked out their window. The thrill of being seen had you squirming in J's arms. You swatted at his hand with your flowers when he tried to prolong your orgasm.

He easily overpowered you and laughed at your sensitive walls clenching down on his fingers. Joker clicked his tongue when you tried bucking away from him.

"Tsk. Always running away." He sighed.

You squeaked when he picked you up, bridal style, and carried you back inside.

Usually Joker would toss you down on any nearby surface and watch your body bounce helplessly before he dragged you back towards him, but today was different.

Today, Joker stopped into your enclosed sunroom and set you down gently on the couch. He hit the light switch and instantly the balcony lights went out and plunged the both of you into darkness.

Now only the moonlight shining in from the glass roof guided his lips to yours.

You dropped your flowers to cradle the back of Joker's head and deepened the kiss. He let you have control for as long as it took him to discard his suit jacket and rip off his tie. He was working on the buttons on his shirt when you pulled away.

"Ngh, no let me... l-let your wife do it." You moaned out.

Your hands were shaking as you undid the buttons. You were too nervous to look up at the panting dragon before you.

Joker let you push his shirt off his shoulders but he tilted your chin up when you failed to look up.

You acknowledged your role and needed to be rewarded.

He whispered your name amongst the lush plants and flora in your sunroom. The air in here was stuffy since he left the balcony's sliding door open. You were already collecting sweat on your brow and good thing Joker took off his makeup earlier or it would be melting off of him.

He still licked at lips in that nervous habit of his.

"Do you want this? Tell me to uhh stop if ya don't." Joker slowly pushed your dress up to bunch up around your stomach. He had no plans of taking it off. If he did, he'd risk tearing it to shreds and that wouldn't do.

If he had it his way, you would wear white everyday, you looked so beautiful in it. But back to the matter at hand.

You nodded in the dark and wrapped an arm around Joker's shoulder. His gold chain was still cool to the touch and you ran your fingers over it fondly.

"I want this. I-I want you. Please, J."

He left a kiss to your forehead and groaned. "You already have me, Y/n."

Joker moved to remove his pants after earning your consent. The sound of his belt buckle in the dark sent a rush of adrenaline to your core. You were excited and the fact you could hardly see made this encounter even more hot.

Your heart was beating out of your chest when you felt Joker's hands slide up your heel clad legs and yank you closer to him. Your back hit the couch cushions and you scrambled for something to hold onto in the dark.

Joker must've seen you flailing around since he guided your hands back onto his shoulders.

No fair how he could see perfectly in the dark whereas you were blind as a hehe... bat. 

"Hey.. I wanna see yo— ah!"

Joker slapped his cock on your pussy as if he heard your joke. You jumped at each impact of his hard on hitting your clit and clawed at his upper back in delight.

He seemed to enjoy the sting and tipped his head back in a groan.

Then a pair of neon green eyes stole your attention. It was unnatural the way they reflected off the lack of light, almost feline at times. Joker's night vision was legendary and it was all focused on you.

Your beautiful body sprawled out on the couch. Your curls framing your face like a halo and Joker swore the white of your gown made your melanin skin glow.

How did he get so lucky? He must be dreaming. If it were a dream, he would enjoy it while it lasted.

Joker slid his dick into you, slacked jaw and eyes filled with longing. Your eyes rolled back feeling him stretch you open and come to a rest inside. Joker panted above you and braced his weight on his hands near your head.

You were now caged in with nowhere to go.

"Yeah? This what you– mmhm d__n, is this what you needed, my Light? If ya want me, then take it. Take. All. Of. Meee." Joker grunted and set a rhythm; steady deep thrusts that jolted your entire body and stole your breath.

You buried your hands into his hair and tugged, knowing J loved that. He moved with the motion and laughed to himself.

"F__k, relax Princess and work with me." He pulled his hips back so he could slam into your pussy deeper.

You cried out and wrapped your legs around his waist. He felt the straps of your heels press into his back.

Note to self, clothed sex was hot.

"See? There ya go.. now I can beat it up just the way ya like it. Ohhhh, I got the best wife. Tight cunt, killer body... sexy moans– louder doll. I wanna hear just how good I'm making ya feel."

You bared your neck as he picked up the pace and plowed into your womb. Each rock of his hips hit your g spot and made you dizzy.

You looked up and watched the clouds distort the image of the moon through the roof. Such a beautiful night spent with the one you love.

Joker noticed your distracted gaze and brought your focus back on him by pressing down on your lower belly. You keened loudly in his ear.

"Haha. Eyes on me, Princess. I know, I know. You can cum if it feels that go~od."

You nodded, gasped sweetly, and then came on Joker's cock. And he didn't stop his powerful thrusts either. He plowed right through your orgasm with no regard for your hypersensitivity.

You couldn't escape his passion and took out your agony on his back. Joker hissed when your nails initially dug into his skin but laughed it off.

"Argh, those d__n nails of yours are sharp! Is it really that good, darling? Too much cock making you go crazy stupid already? You want me to stop? Huh? Too bad, cuz I'm noT done yet." He groaned when your walls clamped down tighter on this dick but he recovered quickly to resume his brutal thrusts.

He picked you up by your waist and positioned you to straddle him properly on the couch.

You cried out when you sank further down on Joker's cock due to the angle.

Now he could see you properly as a beam of moonlight shined down from the roof to a spotlight on you bathed in white.

Your hair was in complete disarray and your lips red from biting them in pleasure but in Joker's eyes, you were absolutely stunning.

You locked eyes with Joker and braced your hands on his shoulders. His fair skin was flushed red from exertion but he still looked every bit of Gotham's City most wanted criminal.

The dark gleam in his eyes was a warning in itself.

Your gaze latched onto the gold chain hanging around his neck, and most importantly, the tiny charm with your initial bouncing with each thrust Joker made up into your pussy.

It was hypnotizing and you couldn't help but lean forward to kiss Joker.

He didn't mind and slowed things down so you could feel each vein sliding against your gummy walls. The wet slap of skin and heavy pants was the only sound in the sunroom. You wouldn't be surprised if the glass behind Joker was fogged up by your lovemaking. It was still too dark to tell for sure.

You were the focal point here so you leaned back and put in some work to get Joker off.

You rolled your hips in figure eights that he loved so much and was quickly rewarded.

Joker placed his hands onto your hips and used them like handlebars.

"D__n Y/n. F__k meeeeee." He leaned back on the couch and watched you ride his dick, chasing another orgasm.

You didn't care that you were getting your dress dirty or that your feet were killing you in your stilettos.

Joker took one look at you dressed in white and gold and smacked your behind. You whimpered softly. The sting spurred you to go faster and you began chanting Joker's name like a prayer.

"Nuh uh bunny. You know what ta call me." J whined when you clenched tighter around him.

You bit your lip, looking away.

He could call you wife all night long but it was something different about returning the favor. You knew Joker needed this to get off but it meant more to you.

"Say it Y/n.. p-plea— nghh just once. That's all I, ahhh, that's all I neeeed, darling. I want you to have it, but I need.."

Oh. Joker begging meant he was serious. His eyes were squeezed shut as he neared his own release but you could tell something was holding him back.

You could feel it with how handsy and needy he became. Anything could spill from Joker's lips as he reached his summit. He needed whatever this fetish was.

You drew in limited air and blew it out in a shaky moan.

Just the sight of Joker, usually so composed and calculated, losing all self control– because of you, was empowering. At this rate you were gonna cum again.

You wanted Joker to cum with you; it felt right with the emotions floating in the air tonight.

You choked back a moan, "I want it! I want my husband to c-cum. I need you, J! Please fill me up!"

His reaction was instant.

"Yeah? Ya want it? My beautiful wife wants my cum? Anything you want, it's yours, Y/n. Ask of me anything. I will defy my own will to grant your desires!! Y-You can have it all just.. stay with me. F-Foreever. Never.. s__t, so tight! Never leave me Bunny." 

You recognized your own book quote mixed in with Joker's pleas and moans. If possible, you fell even deeper in love. You wouldn't stop for anything after hearing that.

You felt the moment Joker came undone.

He squeezed you close as his hips bucked up into yours uncontrollably. He didn't care about moaning obscenely in your ear because he babbled his deepest darkest fears to you in between struggling to breathe.

"Stay with me, Y/n.. I need.. I need you please— you complete me. You own me. Don't go.. my beautiful wife. M-My Light. All mine.."

It was the most vulnerable you ever heard Joker speak. He was open about his future with you.

You were uncertain about his plans after he healed up and left, but tonight you got a glimpse of the future. He wasn't going anywhere and neither were you and you never felt more closer to him than in that moment.

You bared down and let a silent scream paint your features as your own climax was ripped from out under you.

The fact you came with Joker made the release ten times more intense and hearing him confess in your ear was like an atomic bomb.

Joker fell back and took you with him as the afterglow hit you both. Shivers and gasps were exchanged in the muggy room.

Your dress was sticking to your sweaty skin and you felt absolutely euphoric wrapped up in the arms of your lover. Joker wasn't in any better shape. The satin fabric of your dress was brushing up against his sensitive skin with every rise and fall of your breathing but he couldn't move.

He was slowly softening inside of you and cum was oozing from your pussy and pooling down to your inner thighs.

It was filthy but neither of you could bear to move. You were right where you needed to be. In his arms.

If Joker had a shred of morals he would carry you to the bath and help wash you up but first he had to address what he said during the heat of the moment.

Joker rubbed his scarred lips along your collarbone and subtly cleared his throat.

"I.. meanT it, Y/n." You turned your head and rested it under Joker's chin. "I dunno what started all of this but I uhh.. I'd like that. Us. You know... together.. Not right now! But ahh uhh.. it's on the table for the future... if ya want."

You tensed up in his arms and he thought the worst.

What if you disagreed and thought he was insane? What if you wanted nothing more to do with him? Was this the end of this phenomenal relationship all because he considered marriage?

Joker sounded so cute, all bashful and unsure of himself and you loved watching his eyes dart around in a panic. You put his worries at ease by leaning up and kissing him soundly.

"I meant what I said too silly. I-I need you too but only if you'll have me." You looped your hands with Joker's much larger ones.

He stared at the clash of skin tones and sighed. He was worrying over nothing.

"Forever then, yeah?" He kissed your palm before looking down at you. That breathtaking smile of yours was highlighted by the moonlight.

Since J quoted The Greeks Among Us, you decided to do the same.

"Until the last star fades in the night sky, I'm yours forever and ever, ο εραστής μου."

He rolled his eyes at your direct quote but attacked you with kisses anyway. His sweet little nerd. However the phrase summarized your love perfectly, all for a man who didn't deserve a single ounce of it.

Joker would spend the rest of his days proving his love for you. He could start by giving you that ring he bought.

[disgruntledkittenface]

✨️ Twenty Questions for Fic Writers ✨️

Thank you @allwaswell16 and @haztobegood for tagging me! I love reading everyone's answers to these <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3?

60, including one cowrite

2. What's your total AO3 word count?

831,513

3. What fandoms do you write for?

One Direction. I use the BBC Radio 1 RPF tag for pairings with Nick Grimshaw, and I used the Shawn Mendes (Musician) one a few times, too.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos?

you came into my life, caught up in your love affair, baby, you're the end of june, an honest mistake and tell me what you need

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not?

Yes! I love replying to comments, even when I feel awkward about it. I really like getting replies from authors, I find it discouraging not to, so that's partly why. But a nice comment really makes me day, and I want to let people know I appreciate that. But I might miss one occasionally, and sometimes I don't reply if I think the commenter is being rude.

6. What is a fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

It's probably my first fic, This Town. The whole fic is Niall processing Zayn leaving the band – but more importantly leaving him, and they don't get back together in the end. It's not my fault, Niall wrote a sad song! But also I was in the thick of grieving, so. That's what happened.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I almost, almost always write happy endings, so I could really pick this one at random lol, but I'll go with enough to make a girl blush. I really love how far Louis has come at the end of that fic and how happy she and Niall are together and how good they are together. Plus, I wrote a happy little timestamp for Harry and Zayn (count me in).

8. Do you get hate on fics?

I've gotten comments that don't sit well with me, but not really. I did post a fic set at the beginning of COVID before I knew how bad it would get, and someone messaged me to say they were sorry about the hate it was getting... but I didn't see any?

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind?

yes! I write smut that I find hot, girl direction and boy direction. When I started writing, I felt like I wrote absolutely terrible smut and I worked really hard to figure it out. Practice makes progress, baby.

10. Do you write crossovers? What the craziest one you've written?

I've written a couple of reality show AUs with the actual people from the shows in the fic – you came into my life and you wanna be on top? Nothing too crazy!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen?

I think someone stole a shiall one-shot and posted it on Wattpad. Weirdly, I feel like I haven't made it because that doesn't happen to me more often.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated?

yes! Most recently, someone asked if they could translate pink like the paradise found into Russian and they were so lovely.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before?

I took part in a round robin for Nic's (@louandhazaf) birthday a few years ago! (Louis referring to merlot as the basic bitch of wines was me!) Co-writing has come up as an idea a couple of times, but the timing or idea etc has never been right.

14. What's your all-time favorite ship?

I kind of have to fall deep for a pairing to write them, so I love a lot of pairings! Aside from larry, I think gryles might be my favorite. Something about the pining best friends who can't be together because of... REASONS just gets me where I live.

15. What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

I had an idea for a lilo exes to lovers AU based on bennifer and I wrote a snippet that I really liked for it, but I felt like I was white washing Jennifer Lopez, if that's the right word? Like you can't separate her from the fact that she's Puerto Rican, so casting Louis in that role didn't feel right. I could try to figure out another way to approach it, but I don't really think I'll feel inspired enough.

16. What are your writing strengths?

I think I'm really good at continuity, and writing scenes with lots of people and involving all of them.

17. What are your writing weaknesses?

I always feel like I start sentences with "Niall did this" and "Harry did that" (sorry, writing narry at the moment). So, narration that's not action? Does that make sense?

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language for a fic?

I think it can be done effectively. I liked how the French worked in Darling, so it goes. It made sense to include because Harry moved to a country where he didn't speak the language. I tried to make the meaning of the French clear when Harry understood it, but I didn't include translations in the notes because Harry didn't understand a lot, and I wanted the reader in his shoes. I worked really hard on the French because I don't speak it, but I asked @somethingwittyorother to look it over and their feedback was incredibly helpful.

19. First fandom you wrote for?

One Direction!

20. Favorite fic you've written?

It's usually the last fic that I posted, so right now it's Suddenly Last Summer. I had the best time writing it and it was such a fulfilling creative outlet, and I just love it.

I'll tag: @crinkle-eyed-boo @uhoh-but-yeah-alright @neondiamond @kingsofeverything @louandhazaf @absoloutenonsense @homosociallyyours @nouies @onlythebravest

[moonchildreads]

so last year my always wonderful and dearly beloved @duquesademiel tagged me in a game that said i had to list three things i was proud of in 2022, and i've been thinking about that a lot so here's three things i was proud of in 2023!

i started posting my fics here and on ao3! this was a big thing for me because it was the first time in my life i took my craft seriously and gave it the love and respect it deserves, and i've been really enjoying it! i feel like i know myself better as a writer and as a person, and i've been able to explore a lot of topics i was interested in through my writing and purge some demons in the process. (if you're curious about it, you can read all 147.3k words of my eddie munson fic here, i'm almost done with chapter 24 and will be updating soon!)

i made new friends! i'm a fairly shy person, even if i'm a friendly bunny (i'm still friends with the same group of people since i was six!!! that's over two decades of friendship!!!) so imagine my surprise when i found a new group of friends here that i talk to on a daily basis, that i get to share my life with, and that claim to??? love me??? is this real life??? so shoutout to my spice gorls, and thank you for making this year so much fun and full of love. and while we are at it, shoutout to my q&d besties who i got to hug and kiss and laugh with for a few days during the winter holidays. my heart is much bigger, fuller and healthier because i have you in my life. i'll tag you all below hehe

i grew as a person. still in therapy, just like last year, but i made a lot of progress! 2023 was one of the toughest years of my life, i lost my two grandmothers and it shook my foundations deeply because i am who i am mostly thanks to the women that have raised me, but even when faced with the utmost pain and grief i've ever experienced, i still consider 2023 as a year of growth and profound happiness. my grief may never leave me, but i've found out that i am strong enough to carry it, to let it mold me and, most importantly, to let it soften me. i feel like i love more wholeheartedly and unabashedly now, and i am aware of how finite life is and just how much i want to be here. 2022 bunny would be amazed at how much 2023 bunny wanted to keep living, and that's the thing i'm most proud of and that i'm carrying with me into the new year.

we made it, 2024. let's fucking go <3

tagging the people that made my year so much more worth living so they can share the things they're proud of too:

my dragons: @duquesademiel, my loveliest merryweather; @justahappycloud, my adorable flora; @gutterratt, my wonderful fauna; and @so-inlove-with-the-wrongworld, my literal soulmate. i love you all deeply, madly, truly, and i can't wait until we're reunited under the same roof singing miranda! songs like our lives depend on it again.

my spice gorls: @queenimmadolla, my showstopping vivi; @potatobeanpie, my bravest maisie; @oneforthemunny, my most chaotic evie; and @munsonology, my first ever friend on tumblr and my partner in only-child-related crimes. thank you for letting me talk my shit until your ears bleed and for making me laugh so much my tummy starts hurting. i hope i made you as happy as you made me this year.

[heylabodega]

a week

I wanted to write this sequel (lolol) last weekend, but so busy was it, and so busy this next week that here we are. I've been working, working so much, working on this project that has had me in tears. Twice from being overwhelmed with the project and at least three times from the other people in my firm being so supportive about it -- in combination with my tiredness from having been working on it and thinking about it for weeks.

I've been miserable but GOD I've been happy. GOD to jog to coaching, to lead the coaching session because the lead is out and someone has to do it, to run with my runners, to run home with my fast songs in my ears thinking, 'I am so strong and smart and bright and busy.' To go to trivia with two unsentimental friends, but to really and truly feel that we are all SO happy to be there, all understand the strange inextricable *ping* in the brain that comes from surfacing a fact that we forgot was there. To explain to a friend that I'm having an existential crisis and have him fully engage with that in its most fundamental meaning.

To RUN to move to go to the gym and lift weights, press weights, pull weights. To text my sister who is getting her personal training certification and tell my progress, to send her videos of my lunges for form critique. To feel my body strong and supportive around me.

To go DANCING, to spend days and nights with a group of friends wandering the streets of Brooklyn, to book vacations and trips and cabins.

To WORK and work and WORK to type and type to try to pull thoughts out of thin air into solid things on a google doc like MAGIC to have other people you respect and like read them and say, "this is excellent," to recognize the magic trick, to not know an answer and know people smart enough that you want to hear their answer.

The thing is, the thing you have to understand is, I've had bad jobs, I have had BAD jobs. Both in the service industry, in the poor people genre, jobs no one else I know would ever take and they would be right not to, and in the "knowledge industry" email click click jobs that made me want to die or paid me $50k to spend 25 hours a week thinking I was about to be fired. I won't elaborate but I'm comfortable with my bad-job-having credibility, and more importantly with my i-think-i-might-have-bad-jobs-forever credibility. All of which to say: this is a good job. For all I complain, for all this week genuinely drained me, if me this week talked to me in February 2021, me in February 2021 would be like you joked with your coworkers and bosses about things both trivial and deep? You and your coworkers went out for drinks and they made you cry laughing? You look forward to logging on? You feel smart and valuable in Zooms? When you express complicated thoughts about the structural nature of these problems your coworkers understand and appreciate them? IT'S PART OF YOUR JOB TO HAVE COMPLICATED THOUGHTS ABOUT THE STRUCTURAL NATURE OF THESE PROBLEMS?

Anyways I feel so smart and strong and funny and lucky and as a bonus I've been so pretty the past couple of weeks, which has to be from happiness because the only other alternative is that the $3 undereye masks I bought made a material difference in my beauty and charisma, and that seems impossible

[imichelle-l-rigby]

Reflections: Cillian Murphy’s Limited Edition

Season 3, episode 4

✨almost 2 weeks late✨

———————————————————————

*I am a music prof (predominantly classical vocalist), and I LOVE listening to Cillian’s music choices! That being said, sometimes I won’t like a song simply because of a vocalist (it’s a professional hazard - sorry!) 👩‍🏫

** The following are my own observations/opinions. We may not agree, and that’s ok! That’s what makes music fun! 😊

*** I wouldn’t say I’m well-versed in Cillian’s music preferences, but I do enjoy them (for the most part). I always wind up adding to my own playlists after listening to Cillian’s recommendations.

———————————————————————

Hi everyone, thanks for your patience! Here are my thoughts on episode 4:

🎵Set 1 (Makondi - Theme from Failure)

Makondi: percussion makes me so happy! 😊 no specific thoughts other than there needs to be more percussion songs heard in the mainstream.

Hey Dostla!: ok but the background rhythm reminds me of the “Lip Gloss” song by Lil Mama and that’s all I hear now 😂

Theme from Failure: I like the gradual building of rhythmic layers. Again, definitely inspired by minimalist/tape looping technology from the ‘60s. More importantly, this song had me rolling! 😂😂😂😂😂😂😂😂

🎤Talking Break:

Of course he prefers Autumn (or as I say, Fall, because I’m American and “leaf fall down”😂)

Of course he watches an old movie by the fire during a rain shower.

“Inane anecdote”

An exclusive!!!!

Oooohhh… playing with Ornette Coleman!

Awwww, sweet that he’s using music that his kids recommended!!

Fun - more Nina! 😊😊😊 and yes, now I wanna know why she hated this song/album.

🎵Set 2 (The Family - Time Is On My Side)

The Family: this is sooooo “trendy” for Nina! I need to listen to more of her discography rather than singles. I’m not sure how often she went more “pop” than jazz, and now I wanna know.

Please Don’t Go: Stevie!!!!! 😍😍 his voice is sooooo smooth! I could just listen to him all the time. And I like the chord qualities in this piece - it’s not an out-of-the-box chord progression, but it’s also not cookie cutter. There’s depth to what he gives without it going overboard.

Irma Talks: yes!! 😂

Time Is On My Side: I looooove this song! I think this is a very singable range (I know that sounds weird, but a lot of songs today are in difficult ranges for most of the population. This is pretty accessible).

🎤Talking Break:

I love how he takes these big long inhales before he talks, like he’s been through a taxing day or something 😂

I haven’t heard “iteration” more than usual… 🤔

🎵Set 3 (Come Down Easy - Kim’s Sunsets)

Come Down Easy: patterned off early rock, for sure! It’s even got that whiny/tinny vocal tracking. The weird drone is cool! Idk how to describe it other than the sound of the wind when you’re driving with your car windows rolled down 😅😂

Kim’s Sunsets: interesting harmonies, but I hate the vocal qualities here! 😖😖😖 I like it instrumentally, but vocally, this is an ick!

🎤Talking Break:

Nice! Instrumental music!

My Russian is no better, no worries!

I do love old film music, and it’s interesting to hear what was being used in Soviet film music, especially! I could go on, but y’all would prob find that boring 😅

🎵Set 4 (Boys and the Sea - Muscle de sable)

Boys and the Sea: I LOVE THIS SO MUCH! The piano sounds almost like French Classical music (a lot of artistic sharing between the French and Russians at one point), and the seagull call recording is so haunting! I kinda wanna watch this film just from listening to this!

Muscle de sable: also a piece featuring random recorded sound clips! Much more modern sounding.

🎤Talking Break:

You can definitely tell his mama taught him French - he’s VERY good at it!

🎵 Set 5 (One Word - Secret Teardrops)

One Word: this is pretty fun!!! 😎 no thoughts, just synth vibes!

Secret Teardrops: I find it interesting that the vocal line is less prominent than the instruments. 🤔 granted, this is not a super skillful vocal line…

🎤Talking Break:

I’m glad you liked Secret Teardrops, Cill, but it’s not my favorite. Sorry 🤷‍♀️

Recent music!

Grief and music is such a complicated relationship.

🎵Set 6 (The Greater Wings - Mole in the Ground)

The Greater Wings: wow. This is so beautiful and touching. I’m in my feelings now.

Mole in the Ground: this transitioned so well from one song to the next! Instrumentally, it’s gorgeous. Sadly, I hate the mumble lyrics. 😖

🎤Talking Break

Ok but so many albums are dropping in my birthday this year!!!

🎵Set 7 (Your Silent Face)

Your Silent Face: very synth. And I did not expect a harmonica in the mix… 😅

🎤Talking Break

Ask a reasonable question!!!

Dude. Why jalapeños on popcorn???? Like… I passionately support all things spicy, but this is a weird one for me

HE IS SHAMING HOT DOGS. I know they’re gross mystery meat, BUT. hot dogs are part of my heritage! 😂 besides, kosher hot dogs are kinda amazing and less gross.

🎵Set 8 (The Heights)

The Heights: this reminds me of something but I can’t figure out what. Either way, this is so atmospheric. I feel like I’m back in HS/early college and life was so much simpler (until you get to the end). That has no objective value; however, that’s what I’ve got!

🎤Talking Break: (sorta)

I don’t guitar, but this is such a great story!!!

Beginning musicians are such a vibe. We all suck but are so brave at the same time. 😂 I kinda miss being a beginner.

Blue Monk: I am LOVING this! Blues picking is fab. 😎

Casbah: ooohhhh. I like this as well! The pedal point is interesting (which is hard to do) and I like how the melody dances all over the place.

🎵Set 9 (Can I Call You)

Can I Call You: why is this spooky??? 😰 in other news, the way the expected chord progression is constantly diverted is cool! And even the structure of the song keeps going in unexpected places. Well-done, but somehow reminds me of Halloween spooky times. 👍

🎤Talking Break:

I love how ppl from across the pond (is that a reasonable way to say from the UK or Ireland?) “Graham” - Americans make it 1 syllable

Yorkshire Man: “the OG Kate Bush, herself”

“Jaunty baroque number”

🎵Set 10 (Bertie - Mirror in the Bathroom)

Bertie: I’m trying to decide if this deserves the term “baroque.” 🤔 Maybe? Most baroque music is polyphonic, and this is still distinctly homophonic. However, it might could qualify for “early baroque inspired” (circa 1600) with the choice of instruments and emphasis on text. I do like this! Definitely agree with the term “jaunty”

Kettle factory! ☕️

Mirror in the Bathroom: this is such a weird song but I like it 😂 I’m also starting to wonder if Cillian just likes stuff with sax solos. He’s chosen a lot this season!

🎤Talking Break:

I am shocked it took this long for him to play Zappa

“Obsessed with Frank Zappa” don’t try to downplay it, dude.

🎵Set 11 (Love)

Love: YES this has a major Zappa influence, even with the George Duke component. I haven’t listened to a lot of Zappa (he’s got so much and I honestly don’t even know where to start), but from what I’ve heard, this has his fingerprints all over it.

🎤Talking Break:

I love how concerned he is with lowering our collective heart rates/bpm 😂

🎵Set 12(Heart to Know - The Veil I)

Heart to Know: reminds me of Philip Glass (minimalist composer) a little bit (specifically lulls in his opera Einstein on the Beach).

My heart rate is lowered. 💗

The Veil I: the transition from Heart to this is weird, but I like this song, too! I feel like I’m in a video game with all the electronic sounds.

🎤Talking Break

“Gentle music”

I also wanna see this movie!

🎵Set 13 (Theme de l’eau - Prayer and Procession)

Theme de l’eau: I do often associate flute music with Japanese styles (and some of the non-Western scales), but this also has a Mediterranean feel to it (guitar), and somehow French as well (accordion). Again, there’s a lot of cultural ties between France and Japan, so that’s not super surprising. Yeah. I wanna see what this film is about! I’m curious!

Prayer and Procession: has some Chopin funeral March vibes to it, as well as Protestant chorale/hymn elements.

🎤Talking Break:

Noooo don’t go!

Yay! More song recs from the boys!

“Mind yourselves”

🎵Set 14 (Sleep - Crescent of Sun)

Sleep: … this song does NOT make me wanna sleep! 😳 Cillian Murphy! It is not Halloween yet! Quit with the spooky songs!

I thought he was supposed to be “lowering my heart rate” - psh! I call BS!

20190127: my slightly number dyslexic self hated writing out that title. 🤦‍♀️ anyway, this is MUCH more relaxing of a piece! Another great example of using recorded elements in music. I like how the tones fade in and out like the tide (heard at the beginning I think).

Crescent of Sun: it’s almost like chamber music at the beginning. I’m wondering if the sun is going down or up. The instrument voicing gets higher (indicating upward motion), but the melodic motif goes down. Huh. Interesting!

———————————————————————

Phew! I finally got episode 4 done! Now let’s see if I can crank out episode 5 within the next couple of days before getting to the final episode! (😭😭😭😭😭 this isn’t his real job and it’s a limited series and it has to end soon)

Anyway, thanks for reading!

Tag list:

@iammrsrogers @deliciousnutcomputer @mariamoonie @brownskinsugarplum76 @look-at-the-soul @kj-davis @neverroad @teapothollow @thepurplearmyposts @possessedmarshmallow

[seaofreverie]

Happy 1st anniversary to The Girl Is Crying In Her Latte! I felt like sharing some thoughts on the album for the occasion.

I rarely though about it until this very moment, but I just realized that I can definitely consider this album very special to me personally. Of course, most importantly it was the first album to come out after I learned about Sparks, and my 3rd album that I listened to from them overall, soon after Kimono My House and Propaganda. I already started considering myself a fan around then, but on the more casual side still I suppose (even though I could already tell by then that this was no random band I was getting interested in, but the start of a major hyperfixation, and, well, I was more than right about that). Still, I was definitely already looking forward to this album and planning to listen to it the day it was released. And so I did, and I loved it right away! The day of its release ended up being the same day that I was moving out of somewhere that I stayed the previous two years while studying, and my graduation was coming soon too. So now it has a bit of an end of an era feel to me too. I also remember listening to it a bit later, while visiting a city I've wanted to visit for a while during summer holidays... Some pleasant memories all around definitely.

Since that first listen I've actually had some slightly more mixed feelings about the album. I didn't think it was lacking or anything, I do think it's a brilliant album. Still, I couldn't help but feel like something was slightly "off" about it as a whole whenever I tried to listen to it, so I just had to start appreciating some of the songs on their own before I could come around to the whole album again. Which took a couple of months in the end, but I also have to keep in mind that in that time I was doing lots of catching up with the huge Sparks discography and all those related things, and putting most of my attention to that. I can definitely tell that I love this album now, both for what it is in itself and what it means to me too.

As for some song highlights, Veronica Lake was an early favourite both on this album and in that portion of Sparks' discography that I knew by that point, and it's still one of my favourites on TGICIHL. A Love Story also stood out quickly, I just think it's very fun and the kind of "weird" that I often end up loving in music. A bit later, and especially towards the end of last year, It Doesn't Have To Be That Way became THE song for me from this album however. A big part of it is the lyrics of course, I think it's fair to say that it's one of the most, let's say, relatable?, personal? that possibly ANY song has ever felt to me. Especially the following lines:

They always said that you need to have a plan

Doesn't matter, any plan, any plan they'll understand

It doesn't have to be that way, okay?

As I said, I graduated since, but felt pressured to make the next move in life immediately. It's like I wasn't even allowed to think about where I am now and where I could possibly go next, or even think about how, despite the hardships that came with it, I managed to finish my studies. Not to mention that post-graduation times turned out to be the start of my burnout that has only gotten worse progressively... Not being able to catch a real break without having to make SOME sort of decision, even if it was just continuing my studies with a different field of study, felt truly draining. So it was comforting to hear this sort of reassurance that it's alright if I don't have a plan or don't know where I should go next and if I feel lost and helpless most of the time. And it reminded me of the absurdity of making plans just so that you can say that you have some sort of plan, even if you don't truly want it or feel like it's the right way to go. So, well, actually: screw it! Try things and ditch them! I have since decided to drop out of my new college because it wasn't bringing me anywhere, it was just a "plan they'll understand", and I'm very glad I did.

To be completely honest for a second here, I often got sad (...to put it lightly, haha...) over the last couple of weeks, thinking back to the time of the release of this album and the accompanying tour that I'd later learn was a wonderful tour full of amazing and iconic moments. It wasn't just that I didn't get to see them in concert then, but that I also missed out on observing most of the tour fun as it was happening. Of course I caught up on it later, but, well, can't help but feel some kind of gloomy way about it all anyways, as you'd understand. But still, can't stay locked in the past yearning to relive it (but this time... properly?) forever, so I'm excited for what other wonderful things the future will bring! Sparks never stop going forward after all, so neither can I.

[tooktheladdedgbtq]

....and the Oscar goes to.. | Tom Holland X Male!actor reader. 

A/N: this was just something I wrote because I got inspired I guess. Happy Pride everyone!

——————————————

You couldn’t decide whether time was slipping through your fingers too quickly or if this had been the longest night you’d ever experienced.

seconds slowed to a crawl while you tried to gather yourself before it was your turn to take the stage. You were nervous. Not about being at the oscars or presenting for the first time. Not even about being nominated for your leading role in the second installment of a critically acclaimed trilogy. No, you’d been used to these sorts of things, you’d been an actor since you were a very young kid. Starting on television before film, and you even got to hold the Emmy the show had won when you had just turned a teenager.

No, you were nervous about who exactly you’d be presenting to. Of the five nominees and potential winners, only one could cause such an intensive feeling in your chest. Only one could awaken a sense of dread that battled with a feeling of intensive happiness mixed with anticipation, and it was Tom.

You’d known each other for years and had come to fall in love. You’d met as young co-stars on set and eventually grew into an inseparable friendship that progressed into something far more. Neither of you were sure when the feelings started but it felt like they’d always been there and you weren’t exactly complaining.

Your blissfulness with Tom was beautiful but short lived. After almost a year of being official you both agreed to take a break from the relationship. Unbeknownst to Tom you were just agreeing to save face and hadn’t pried for an answer out of fear of being hurt. You just accepted that this was how things were now, and took a step back.

You’d still kept in contact with him. It was hard not to. He was still your best friend. But whether it was the business of work or something a little more awkward, distance grew between you both as the multi-hour long facetime calls and text threads became once-a-week check-ins to just make sure you were alive and okay.

Time had passed, and you didn’t have a clue what you could possibly say to him now. You certainly didn’t want to ruin his special night. But you’d missed him so much and felt like you would implode at the first sign that he’d be interested in getting back together with you. But you also didn’t want to seem desperate or needy if he’d moved on. You didn’t want to slip and say those three words again in the moment.

Father time showed you no mercy as the sand in his hourglass suddenly shifted from a slow-motion drip to a flood. The seconds you’d spent daydreaming of your past with Tom and pondering about the your potential future had passed and left you with little time to gather yourself before presenting. still you shook your hands, arms, and lastly shoulders, putting all your worries aside and waited for introduction from the host.

Before long you’d been counted in to walking on stage, and heard the host over the microphone. “Ladies and Gentlemen, to present the award and introduce the nominees for Best Supporting Actor, please welcome one of this year’s nominees and one of our generation’s greatest talents: Y/F/N Y/L/N.”

The applause erupts from the audience like a revved up engine as you took center but it was nothing compared to the standing ovation you’d receive later on that night when receiving your own award for Best Actor.

You were stood promptly center staged with the towering Oscar statue reflecting onto the black stage floor beneath your feet. Your outfit was alluring and would surely be the next hot topic which is rare for male stars. You looked like a million bucks. Everyone knew it, most of all, Tom.

You smile and wave as you approach the microphone, your teeth shining a blinding white, and wait for a hush from the crowd.

You chuckle lightly as a few hoots and hollers sound out as the cheers subside.

You eye the monitor across the room and start to read, your nerves dying down as your jokes land and laughter echoes around the room.

As you finish the introduction, clips start to show behind you to accompany the names of the nominees as the cameras catch a glimpse of each of their reactions.

You couldn’t help but notice how tough the competition was as each actor was called. Steven Yuen playing a detective in a thrilling murder mystery. John David Washington in a fictional film playing the world’s first black astronaut aiding in the discovery of lovecraftian horrors. Andrew Garfield for his role as a psychotic narcissist and genius businessman. Oscar Issac acting in a sci fi space opera asking questions of existentialism.

Finally, you had to withhold your smile as you called out the last name. He had returned to his Billy Elliot roots being nominated for his role in a astonishing musical romance film. “Tom Holland.” You’d been ecstatic when he’d told you about it as you’d always recommend he tried it again since it made him so happy in his younger years.

You spot him a few rows from the stage, making eye contact with him and wondering if he was thinking about you the way you had done with him earlier. You couldn’t help but notice him squirming in his chair and fidgeting with his hands. Selfishly asking yourself if this wasn’t just about the award but about having you present it to him.

Seeing you here after what felt like an eternity apart and your reunion potentially being the greatest achievement of both your careers. Making it the greatest night of your lives, that is, if you were still together. But you were still best friends. That’s what mattered. So you push your self centered thoughts aside and shoot him a small wave that he returns with a smile and thumbs up. letting you know he was okay and that you could continue as the camera pans back to you capturing your not so hidden giddiness.

This awarded some small oos and aahs from the crowd as your relationship with him had been a wholly celebrated one. especially among your marvel peers.

You’re handed an envelope and statue as the music ends and the applause dies down and you take one final glare into the camera before beginning to open the envelope.

“....and the Oscar goes to,” you take a peek at the crowd and see some of the nominees holding hands with loved ones. others plainly

awaiting your next words with bated breath. The anticipation shone on everyone’s faces. Even those that weren’t nominated. Your not-so-hidden grin giving away the answer mere milliseconds before his name escaped your lips. “Tom Holland!”

Tom shot up with a shared expression of shock and happiness on his face. Pecking his mother on the cheek as she wipes the tears of pride from her eyes. His best mate Harrison gives him a quick embrace and a pat on the back before he moves on to shake hands with the director and smile at everyone cheering him on as he gradually moves toward the stage still completely baffled at the victory.

As he walks towards you in his pink pastel colored suit and brown leather dress shoes you can’t help but swell with an overwhelming feeling of joy having been here to share this career defining moment with him. You thought about how far you’d both come to get here and almost started tearing up remembering all you’d been through together.

He skipped up the miniature steps and blanketed you with both arms. You didn’t want it to end as you hadn’t felt it in a while. You threw your arms around his neck and he tightens his hold around your torso. Before you could even process them, your blunt thoughts spill out as whispers.

“I’m so incredibly proud of you. you deserve this and so much more.” you hear a small chuckle escape him as he responds. “I am trying not to cry y’know mate?” a wolf whistle comes from the crowd as you apologize for being so sappy and before he can tell you off for it you hand him his award and shove him off toward the microphone.

As he takes center stage you stand off to the side to watch him give his acceptance speech. He pauses and takes a second to gather himself before he starts talking straight from his heart with nothing prepared.

“Um, Wow. I really can’t believe this is really happening and I probably still won’t believe it happened tomorrow. Just.. wow.” his words were filled with that charmingly British accent you’d come to love so much.

“First I would like to thank my mother, without whom of course, I would not be here. I would like to thank the academy and everyone who worked on this movie from the producers and camera men, make-up and costumes, to our wonderful writers, composer, back up dancers and vocalists, and of course my friends, my co-star and the director Damien Chazelle.” whom he gestures to sitting in the second row. “I share this with all of you and I can’t thank you enough for awarding me with the opportunity to create something I love so much.”

He thanks the other nominees before turns towards you to end his speech. you felt your heart in your hands when you saw his big brown puppy eyes dart in your direction with an intensive glare of admiration.

“last but most importantly, I want to thank the inspiration for all of the love songs I sung in the film and the reason I decided to take the role. The person standing here on my right.”

Your jaw drops and your eyes widen when his words hit you like a speeding semi. you realize that he’d just called you his muse in so many words. the inspiration behind the love songs in the film no less. Meaning that with every lovestruck note his character sung he was reminded of you. All that time spent worrying if the distance between you two would cause him to forget about you, or if he’d maybe moved on and found somebody else. But no such thing had happened. He was relating his character’s longing in the film to his longing for you this entire time and that made your heart do a backflip.

You blush and cover your still ajar mouth with your fist whilst trying not to pay attention to the crowd who’s attention was fully focused on you.

He takes a deep sigh before continuing. “Y/N you’re not only the reason I took this role, but you’re the reason I was able to play it with such sincerity. You’ve been a unwavering beacon of support throughout my career in general but here you really gave me the inspiration for something special. He faces the audience again as the all follow his words with whispers of how adorable you both were. “from reading lines together in the middle of the night, to keeping me company when i’m on the brink of a meltdown.” It was all true and it only made you miss you relationship more and you found it difficult to hold back your tears.

“Y/N is the kind of best friend everybody needs, the kind of partner everybody deserves, and the person I’m so incredibly lucky to have known for so long. ..and I still can’t believe he never figured out the lyrics were all about him, It was kind of obvious-” the audience laughed you’re so close to swooning as he turns toward you again. “But, with all my heart, I love you, Y/N. Always will.” you feel as if you’re floating.

He shifts to the crowd one last time to say a final thank you before you both walk off stage one arm around one another’s shoulders. You have a short but sweet conversation backstage with him where reassures you that everything he said on stage was true and completely unscripted. He wants to talk more but knows your category is coming soon so he asks for a later opportunity and you agree before returning to your seat in the crowd.

The rest of the night flew by with you winning the award for best actor and receiving the biggest applause of the night. Tom joined in the standing ovation. You thanked everybody involved in making the film, the academy, and squeezed a little joke directed towards Tom that garnered a shared laugh from both him and the audience. You were the last award of the night and after the celebrations it was time to return to your place, where Tom was waiting for you. Wanting to talk about everything that had happened not just tonight but everything leading up to it. He also hoped you’d kept a spot open in your heart for him to return to.

[darkandstormyart]

Xicheng fic recs

(figured i might make a list of my own)

(to be expanded as i dig out more treasure/remember stuff)

in no particular order:

Deep as the Yearning Night by FreckledStarKnight

“At first, it was pure chance. The second time was accidental. And the third time? Well, they say the third time’s the charm, after all. Lan Xichen discovers that Jiang Wanyin sings beautifully and is immediately enamored by it. His pursuit of Jiang Wanyin’s secret talent leads to a discovery and a series of events that he did not anticipate at all. Not that he’s complaining, of course. He got what he came for and more. Or, how two sect leaders get together through the song called love. CQL-verse.“

post-seclusion lxc

trying to get jc to sing

bonus lxc & jin ling feels i hadn’t considered before

cute

Always use protection by hesselives

“In which Lan Wangji attempts to hire a new bodyguard for his older brother, a well-known traveling exorcist. Jiang Wanyin doesn’t even make his carefully considered list of Top Ten Candidates, and yet here he is.

Lots of wandering in the countryside, distant yelling, and mildly inconvenient spirits.”

bodyguard au

honestly just really intersting worldbuilding

Rewrite the stars by Arashii

“Five great kingdoms have been fighting for years and when the kingdom of Yunmeng is destroyed, the Crown Prince Jiang Cheng vanishes.In Gusu, Lan Xichen makes an offer impossible for Jiang Cheng to refuse. His life or revenge? There’s only one option and Jiang Cheng swears loyalty to the man he hated the most his whole life, the Crown Prince of Gusu, Lan Xichen himself.Written for XiChengFest2020 - Day 4“

ROYALTY AU ROYALTY AU

enemies to lovers!

flashbacks! i love flashbacks so much ohmygod

No paths are bound by Arashii

“In seclusion, Lan Huan has the support of a ghost no one has seen since the massacre of Yunmeng Jiang. His feelings start changing with the often visits and conversations they share. Before Lan Huan can confess though, he ascends, leaving everything and everyone behind him.

Two hundred years later, back to the Human Realm and without powers, the Martial God Zewu-Jun has a mission to uphold. His Heavenly Calamity started. The clues are little and the support comes in the most unexpected form, the current Ghost King: Sandu Shengshou. Now they need to stick together to contain a menace that is slowly growing.“

TGCF AU TGCF AU

ghost king jiang cheng come on

doesn’t follow tgcf plot, just the setup so no spoilers

jiang cheng gets the dogs and the xichen he deserves

once upon a dream by cafedeolla

“Xicheng soulmate AU

An au where your dreams are small snippets of your soulmate’s day. They’d show small things like buying coffee, reading a book, or hanging out with people from their perspective.

The problem was that people always have expectations and Jiang Cheng knows he always falls short of them. Time and time again.“

soulmate au, but being soulmates is more a problem than a solution

misunderstandingssss all over the place

now with a squel (in progress?)

Lan Furen series by jagaimocchi

“Jiang Cheng leaves Lotus Pier before the Wen Internment Camp and before the destruction of his home. When he meets Lan Xichen on the run from the Wens after the burning of Cloud Recesses, his plan to live a peaceful life away from cultivation sects is quickly derailed. Now, free to make his own choices, he cannot find it in himself to leave the other man's side.

With love, patience and time, Jiang Cheng finds his own happiness and peace with his past.“

have you ever wanted a fic where jiang cheng peaces out from home in search for a better life, bc he’s Had Enough??? jags got you covered

adorable xicheng

good uncle-dad-figure Lan Qiren

ongoing <3

Just around the riverbend by JungleJelly

“One day.

Jiang Cheng just wanted one day of peace and quiet, away from home, away from his responsibilities, away from his idiot brother and his nutcases of a mother and father. Just a few hours alone — him and a boat and nothing else.

Clearly, that was too much to ask for.”

now with a new story in the series which is adorable too!!!

mermaid!lxc need i say more?

Bad ideas (where they lead) by JungleJelly

“Jiang Cheng is a busy man. Fortunately, he is also a huge pushover when it comes to his sister, so when she recommends that he start doing yoga, he agrees pretty easily.Featuring Lan Xichen in yoga pants, Jiang Cheng’s inability to handle a crush, and, perhaps most importantly, a big fluffy dog.“

done for 2020 MXTX MiniBang

yoga instructor Lan Xichen

Jiang Cheng is: struggling with a crush on the yoga guy from youtube & very angry about that

If there’s a price for rotten judgement by TheWanderingHeart

“All Jiang Cheng wants to do is, well... his job, really. Other than that? Keep the city safe, keep his nephew alive, keep his sanity intact (if possible).

So when his brother calls with unexpected news, he knows all of that is about to fly out of the window.

***

[Every instinct is telling him don’t ask, you don’t want to know. By this point, Nie HuaiSang has scooted closer to listen. Jiang Cheng takes a steadying breath and pulls out his antacids. “What did you do?”]”

superhero au, come on

jc just trying to do his job in peace

(he can’t)

i love it so much oh my god *sobs*

The Form of Boneless Ice by TheWanderingHeart

“Mythical beasts have long ago been driven to extinction by the gentry — hunted for sport, but more importantly for their magical cores. Since then, there remains only one creature that has never been caught. The Jiang’s retreated a long time ago. Abandoning land altogether, they sought safety where the humans could not reach.It all comes to a head though, purely by chance. (Or is it by fate that a spontaneous decision allows for them to meet? If fate were a rock!) Jiang Cheng suddenly finds his whole life balanced on the head of a pin — on the flimsy promise of a human boy. In his opinion, things cannot possibly get worse!(But then they do when the Wens decide it’s finally time to search for the elusive merpeople, and suddenly nowhere is safe.)“

there she goes again, with another beautiful xicheng story full of awwww and mythology

actually one of the first xicheng fics i read

i chose it because there were mermaids

painfully accurate takes on Jiang family dynamics

kids! lots of kids!

Let me Slytherin to Your Heart by TheWanderingHeart

“Jiang Cheng never thought he'd return to Hogwarts, but in hindsight, he probably should have known that someday he would.With his nephew about to start school, he reluctantly takes his good friend's bad parenting? career? advice and ends up tumbling head-first back into the madness that he hoped he'd left behind... and rediscovering some feelings he thought he'd left behind too.“

Harry Potter au!

just really fecking cute

lots of snakes

[I am not going to link all of Jo’s fics, though I probably could, just my 3 favourites. UOSB is there by default]

Talent Hunt Crew Finds Angry Guy Shouting On College Campus, Recruits Him For Vocal Projection Abilities by oh_fudgecakes

“Jiang Cheng, resident Angry Guy and heir to a conglomerate empire, has never been the apple of his father’s eye. Quashed under the shadow of his brilliant brother, the music prodigy Wei Wuxian, Jiang Cheng sees his chance to turn things around when he is recruited by the All-Stars Lan Talent Hunt. One problem: he can’t sing to save his goddamn life.As he struggles to develop his nascent singing abilities, Jiang Cheng finds himself sucked into the whirlwind drama of reality TV, helped along by his adoring siblings, his irritable vocal coach Wen Qing, and strangely enough, the unfairly attractive host of the All-Stars Lan Talent Hunt, Lan Xichen. Somewhere in the glare of the stage lights and an unexpected first love, Jiang Cheng stumbles upon the thing he was searching for all along: the courage to dream — and to attempt the impossible.“

done for 2019 MXTX Big Bang

uuuuuuuuuuh i might have cried maybe

heartwarming? painful at times? lots of family love?

slowburn xicheng being lovely

The Provenence of Hope series by velithya

“A chance meeting on a night hunt sets a course of events into motion that will change everything. Featuring Xicheng getting together, recovery for Lan Xichen, healing for Jiang Cheng, and always, always, hope.“

got everything. feels. hope. love. ~~healing~~

A Small Measure of Peace by Sandstone112

“With his brother in seclusion, Lan Xichen finds himself in temporary custody of his nephew with little to no expertise in the child-raising department. Uncertain and alone, Zewu-Jun is willing to do everything to be the person Yuan needs—even if it means inviting Sandu Shengshou to a playdate.“

a loooot of adorable family times with jc and lxc taking care of their nephews

good grandpa lqr!

canon but fixed and less painful

🍋🍋🍋🍋🍋if you wish to avoid scurvy:🍋🍋🍋🍋🍋

Some day I’m gonna make you mine series by locketofyourhair

xicheng getting together through the years

friends with benefits but the real benefits are the friends we made along the way

Take me over (take me tonight) by velithya

jiang cheng has a tattoo and lan xichen doesn’t stand a chance

i'd be the sweet feeling of release (mankind now dreams of) by piyo13

two bros, chilling in a cave, no feet apart because they don’t want to lose their cultivation powers what are you gonna do

haven’t read yet and shame on me, but AM GONNA:

Upon Our Silver Bridge by TheWanderingHeart obviously

““When the path ignites a soul, there's no remaining in place. The foot touches ground, but not for long.” ― Hakim Sanai

**

Lan Xichen's sorrows have caught the attention of something. Unlike the adventures and foes they have faced before, there is no obvious enemy here to defeat. If this is the same thing they thought had taken Nie Mingjue's life, then he believes it is fated for him to die as well. Nothing can stop the black fire when it wants to burn.Jiang Cheng is sure his part in this is over. Wei Wuxian is back, his grand adventure concluded, and he'd never been at the centre of it anyway. So what does it matter what happens to him in the end? Slowly, he will come to realise that there will always be a battle to fight, a story to tell, a choice to make, and there is no such thing as an end to anything.“

it was difficult to do things in 2020 and few i regret not doing more than not reading uosb yet :’(

i will tho

Emergency Help Wanted by piyo13

“EMERGENCY HELP WANTED I lied when I got my job. I told them I had a kid so I could leave early from work to pick him up from daycare, take him to doctor's appointments, and occasionally miss a day when he's sick. Long story short, I'm in too deep. I didn't think it through. Looking to rent a kid for bring your child to work day. Must be a boy ages four to six, longish dark hair, likes soccer. Must also be artistic as the macaroni noodle paintings I made seem a little advanced for his age. Also, I will pay extra for someone willing to play the role of husband when dropping him off. He's a prosecuting attorney who often brings his work home. Message me for further details. Serious inquiries only.“

Running Our Hands Through Embers by MarvelousMar

“If asked, Jiang Cheng would compare falling in love with Lan Xichen to a moth inevitably drawn to a flame.It burned.***In which Jiang Cheng discovers that even death can't help him escape from his trauma, so he embarks on a quest to save the people he loves, fix what he can, make the love of his life fall for him, and maybe, somewhere along the way, do a little bit of healing.”

The Beginner’s Guide to Moving On by InvincibleMel

gone from ao3, but i think there’s a link with a pdf going around

[fairyoftbz]

a day at the beach | l. juyeon

🌊 pairing: juyeon x fem!reader 🌊 word count: 4k 🌊 genre: fluff, a lot of awkward flirting, kind of friends-to-lovers 🌊 tw: none, mention of the ocean and going underwater(?) 🌊 synopsis: you spend a day at the beach with your friends and it leads to something new. 🌊 a/n: my second and last work of the summer collab hosted by the lovely @bangchan-fairy ✿ i had a lot of fun writing it and I hope it'll be enough!

╰☆☆☆☆╮

You had forgotten how tiring it was to spend a day at the beach. Soaking and sweating under the sun, running around in the sand and play at different games in the water that have you tired at the end of the afternoon, but it was a good type of exhaustion. It’s the type of feeling where you could fall asleep at any moment, but you wouldn’t mind keep on playing and laughing either.

Laying on your stomach on your towel, you enjoyed the warm rays of sunshine drying the salty water on your skin. Hair was all over the place as you tried to tie it back to prevent it from going everywhere, but it was to no avail, so you gave up and stood up. Ruffling your hair to get rid of the sand trapped in it, you managed to tie it away from your face and neck, finally sighing in content as you could feel the wind caress the skin in the base of your exposed, sweaty neck.

The majority of your friends was still playing in the water, but you still had Kevin, Chanhee and Jacob resting on their respective towel. The eldest was peacefully holding a book, his free hand mindlessly caressing his stomach as his eyes followed along with the story with entertainment. You smiled at Chanhee when a familiar TikTok song erupted from his portable speaker, the action waking Kevin up as he was right next to him.

A few of your friends gestured you to join them in the water, but they all got negative answers. Hyunjae and Eric almost begged you to come, making big arm movements and yelling a bunch of begs until you finally gave in, earning cheers from your friends. You carefully jogged to the cooler, wet sand after tossing your cap and sunglasses on your towel. You let out a shriek when the water touched your feet, all your muscles contracting as your friends laughed at your shocked state.

“It’s so cold, what the hell!” you yelled as a small wave came and crashed onto your calves, sending goosebumps in your entire body as you expected the ocean to be a bit warmer, but kept going anyway. “Come on, Y/N, you can do it!” Juyeon yelled from where he was, dozens of meters away from the shore. Clutching your jaw, you progressively made your way into the water, smiling when the boys cheered again when you dove underwater. It was fresh, almost cold, but it felt uplifting, and most importantly, fun.

Once you reappeared at the surface, the boys were surrounding you and you laid on your back, feet hitting the water hard to splash them. A water fight broke out, and you sunk underwater to escape for a few seconds all the splashing and screaming from your friends.

It was your turn to scream underwater and resurface as soon as possible when two hands landed on your waist, softly gripping the flesh of your hips. You sharply turned around, only to find Juyeon laughing at your frightened face.

“Please never do that again,” you said half-laughing, half recovering from his malicious joke, some flashbacks of Jaws coming back into your mind for an instant. Pushing his gear down, mask and snorkel dangled around his neck, long black fins in hand, he stood next to you, breathing heavily as droplets of water fell on his face.

“Did you see something cool?” he nodded at your question, showing you the net bag attached to his wrist. He found a few colourful rocks, some trash, a few coins and two shells, one catching your eye.

“This one looks really pretty,” you pointed at the said shell, only to have Juyeon nearing his hand to yours. “Take it,” he mumbled, and you glanced at him, refusing with a gentle smile. “No, no, keep it,” you answered, and it was his turn to shake his head.

As your friend didn’t retract his hand and kept looking at you, you shyly took the shell in your hand and thanked him, gaining a smile from him before he got out of the water. Younghoon suddenly shrieked and whined when he felt some seaweed brushing his ankle, making everyone laugh, including you. Some of the other tourists were looking at your group from the side, not enjoying how loud you were becoming. You quickly noticed and quieted them, vaguely motioning to the elderly couple on the beach that was meaningly watching you.

“Are you already getting out of the water? It has only been a quick minute,” Eric asked as you walked closer to the shore, the waves almost making you lose your balance. “I’m coming right back, I’m just thirsty,” you claimed and ran back to your towel, feet burning under the scorching sand.

“Ah, Y/N! You’re here. The water is beautiful, and I’m trying to persuade the boys to come and snorkelling with me. Do you want to tag along?” “Okay, sure? Who’s coming?” you said, looking at the other boys on the beach as you grabbed a bottle of water from the cooler next to Jacob, who put the lid back on as soon as you were done. “The two of you,” Kevin smirked, his annoying, playful tone made you roll your eyes, Juyeon paying absolutely no mind to his comment. “Fine, let’s go,” you said before seizing the mask and snorkel Juyeon was handing you and you both ran back into the water.

“They’re cute,” Jacob mumbled, hand supporting his head as he went back to reading, the two other boys approving his words.

As you quickly tried to put on everything to catch up with Juyeon, he saw you struggling to put on your fins, so he gently grabbed your ankle to bring it closer to the surface. You quickly held onto his shoulder, your proximity with the young man making the other boys coo and gag. Almost hissing at them, you offered them a death glare while Juyeon simply smiled to himself, not paying attention to a single of their comments as he focused on securely tying your fins around your heels.

“Are we good to go?” he asked, and you signed ‘ok’ with your thumb and index finger before placing your head underwater.

You stayed near Juyeon, making sure to heavily splash your friends as you swam away from the coast. Feeling satisfied as you heard them complain. The water was getting progressively colder, feeling goosebumps rise on your skin, but the view was worth the chills. Your eyes trailed everywhere around you in the sand, in search of any kind of source of life through the translucid water.

Juyeon suddenly pointed at the ground, discerning a hermit crab making his way to a safer place, deeper in the sand. You smiled at the sight of the small creature, following its movements before watching disappear under the sand.

Your eyes widened in your mask when you saw Juyeon dive, bubbles coming out of his snorkel. He rummaged through the sand for a few seconds, before going straight back to the surface. You got your head out of the water, watching your friend blow the water out of his snorkel just like a whale. He held another shell, similar to the one he gave you.

“How do you notice those? I barely even noticed the hermit crab you pointed at,” Juyeon smiled as he spat some salty water out of his mouth, wiping it with the back of his hand.

“I remembered the spot I searched before coming back to you and the boys. I think it’s a good one, there’s a lot of beautiful things to look at,” he explained, and you nodded, waving at the boys on the beach with a smile. “Look, now we’re matching,” he said as he showed you his shell, a happy look on your face. “Keep it in a safe place,” you suggested while giggling, and he nodded, putting it in his bathing suit pocket before diving back to his searches.

For the remaining hours of the afternoon, you snorkelled with your friend, making beautiful discoveries all around the shore, such as another hermit crab. You gently picked it up from the shell and let it float around for a while, observing its behaviour as Juyeon dove even deeper. You had struggled to pick up the hermit crab because the sand looked way closer than it actually was, and the sensation of the salty water filling in your snorkel to the brim wasn’t the best feeling ever. When you reappeared at the surface, you expulsed all the water from the snorkel and stayed still for a while, moving your fins to keep your head above the water level, your body slowly following the waves.

You were amazed by how the ocean flora and fauna was beautifully hidden from the rest of the world. Letting yourself slowly sink deeper, the water pressure tightening around you, water filling your snorkel in big bubbles, but you didn’t pay much attention. Some small fish swam around you, speeding when you reached out a hand in an attempt to grab or touch them. Being underwater felt good and somewhat reassuring, the noises from outside were muffled by the thick layers of water surrounding you. It was as if you were receiving a big, reassuring hug from nature and nothing could actually happen to you.

As your lungs started running out of air, you felt a presence behind you, only to discover Juyeon observing you. Inside his goggles, you could see his worried eyes and furrowed brows, so you hastened to reassure him about your safety by signalling it with your fingers. He motioned you to go back up to the surface, and you followed him, slowly ascending face to face, his eyes never leaving yours as you stayed close to the other.

You let out a big sigh as you took off your snorkelling equipment, feeling suddenly heavy and tired. A hand running on your skin, you gently wet it to get rid of the marks that lingered on your face due to the tightness of the mask, smiling at your friend as he did the same, throwing his head back to replace his hair correctly.

“What were you doing down there? You got me scared, you weren’t moving. I thought something happened to you,” Juyeon asked as you slowly moved into the water and started getting closer to the shore, feeling the water getting progressively warmer. “I’ve always wanted to stay still in the ocean for a moment, and it felt super good,” you explained a bit out of breath as you were swimming, Juyeon touching the ground before you so he started walking, his flexed muscles tiredly moving as the waves pushed you two closer to the shore.

Almost all your friends were gone, only Jacob and Sangyeon waving at you from their spot on their chairs, just like two parents waiting for their kids to be tired and sleepy. You nearly fell over as you struggled to walk on the sand to get back to your friends, who were watching you out of the corner of the eye. Juyeon walked at your pace and rid you of your equipment when you joined your friends.

“Did you have fun together?” Jacob asked with a smile, hair slightly messy and dried because of the salt.

You tiredly nodded as Juyeon explained where you went and what you saw, still standing up with his hands on his hips as he sometimes pointed towards the ocean. Sangyeon smirked as he caught your eyes lingering on Juyeon's healthy body while listening to him, earning an elbow hit from you as you sat next to him, thanking him with a smile as he passed you your towel.

“I didn’t expect this to be this tiring, but it was a nice experience,” you admitted, and your friends laughed, a genuine smile appearing on Juyeon’s face. “You spent almost the entire day in the water, it’s normal to be tired,” Jacob said in his usual reassuring voice, handing you your bottle of water from the cooler. “Where did the other boys go?” Juyeon asked as he looked around, trying to see if they were any closer or hiding. “They left a moment ago, they wanted to freshen up before dinner.”

“Yeah, we ordered pizza for everyone,” Sangyeon explained and you two nodded, your stomach grumbling at the mention of one of your favourite foods. “Don’t worry, we got you your favourite,” Jacob giggled as Juyeon was about to open his mouth, only to make you all laugh and smile at how predictable he was. “Thank you,” you said in unison and Jacob sent you a playful wink, taking off his sunglasses as the sun wasn’t as bright as before. Sangyeon sighed while he started picking up his belongings, Jacob imitating him.

“Are you two coming?” Jacob asked and you looked at Juyeon, who was already looking at you with his eyebrows raised, waiting for your answer. “I just want to go one more time in the water before going back to the hotel if you don’t mind,” you said as you stood up, placing your towel on your chair. “Yeah, me too,” Juyeon said, and you turned around, just catching a glimpse of an understood look between Sangyeon and Jacob, the two boys smirking at each other.

You frowned for a second but paid no mind, ignoring them as you walked back to the waterside. The salty foam came crashing on your feet and ankles as you jogged deeper into the water, diving back in, smiling as you couldn’t get rid of that happiness when you were surrounded by water while swimming. Juyeon followed you not so long after, and you waved at the two boys on the shore as they started walking towards the hotel.

“It was nice diving with you, do you think we could do this more often? I had a lot of fun exploring down there,” you said and Juyeon looked at you, a surprised look painted on his face. “I mean sure, whenever you want, we can always do it again! I know good spots in our town where the water is even more beautiful than here,” he explained and you accepted his proposition with a smile, keeping the conversation going as you two remained still in the water.

Once you were tired of trying to keep your head afloat and felt the conversation slowly dying out of presumable nervousness, you rested on your back, gently waiting for the waves to decrease the distance separating you from the beach.

The sky above your head was gorgeous and infinite, tones going through all the colours of the spectroscope as your eyes didn’t know where to look. The water wrapped around your body and the sight of the sky hanging above your head never felt so comforting, you could stay here for hours if it was possible. You let out a big sigh as you relaxed, sometimes shivering, the water getting colder as the sun was close to disappearing.

Juyeon’s upper body appeared in your field of vision and he grinned, observing you relaxing in the water. His eyes disappeared into crescent moons when your back touched the sandy ground faster than intended, taking the hand he was offering you to stand up. He didn’t let go of your hand and ran towards your chairs for the last time, collapsing and sprawling on them out of exhaustion.

Juyeon let out a groan as he repositioned himself in his camping chair, resting his head against the backrest as his legs were spread open in front of him. His right knee rested against yours, but none of you moved away, the action making Juyeon’s ears flush bright red and stifle a smile while closing his eyes. You liked this accidental contact with him, and you wanted to enjoy it while it lasted. Quickly glancing at your friend, you noticed that his eyes started fluttering, pearls of water falling from his messy strands of hair on the far end of his cheeks, rolling down his jaw to crash in his strong neck. As tempting as it looked, you had to force yourself not to wipe the water off his face with the back of your hand, thinking that your gesture would be a bit out of hand.

Out of nowhere, he sat back up, head moving left to right while looking for something, emitting a surprised sound when he found a dry towel resting on his sports bag.

“Is it yours?” he asked, and you shook your head, only to have him unfolding it and wrap it around your shoulders. You opened your eyes wide, startled by his actions, but didn’t dare to say anything, you just smiled at him. Tightening the towel around your body, it felt nice to feel something dry and somehow warm as your towel was completely soaked due to you going back and forth in the ocean during the entire day.

“Do you need anything?” you asked as he furiously blinked, searching for something again. “Can I just use it?” he said, pointing to the towel he had just given you.

Nodding, you were about to unwrap it from your shoulders, but he was swifter, grasping the far end of the towel and wiped his salty, reddened eyes with it, pushing his chair nearer to yours to be more comfortable while doing so. You didn’t dare to move in order not to inflict him a stray elbow hit, smiling at him once he was done.

“Thanks, I just had some sand in my eyes,” he clumsily said, and you shook your head with a smile. “Don’t worry about it,” you reassured him, and he offered you a warm smile, your heart suddenly quickening at the sight.

You both sighed simultaneously, feeling the tiredness and hunger winning over you. You both felt at peace as the sound of the waves began to lull you, the comfortable atmosphere making you slightly shiver in delight. It was hard for both of you to stay awake after you had been swimming all day, breathing through a snorkel was as exhausting as doing any other physical activity.

Juyeon had spent his entire day in the water, and the other boys told you that he got up at dawn to go for a run before joining you at the beach, so it was natural for him to be this drained.

What you didn't expect was his head rolling onto your shoulder, lips slightly parted as he gave up, his slumber sinking him into the comfortable hold of Morpheus's arms. You tried not to move too much in fear of waking him up, so you just mindlessly stared at the ocean stretching as far as the eye could see, following at some jet-skis cutting through the waves and a lifeboat ordering some bathers to return to the secure area.

Loud voices made you turn your head to the side and smile when you saw your friends arriving, all dressed in proper clothes, their hands full of soda and pizza boxes. You greeted them with a soft wave, showing the first to arrive that Juyeon was sleeping on your shoulder. Sunwoo smirked at you and placed the sodas in the cooler under the closed umbrella, Younghoon laying two large picnic tablecloths on the sand.

Your friends gently snickered at the innocent boy asleep on your shoulder, taking pictures of him to the potential blackmail. You shook your head with a thin smile, not approving so much of their method, but you knew there was nothing mean behind all of this, just fun. Once everyone was settled in and ready to eat and spend the evening together, you decided to wake Juyeon up by squeezing the forearm that was sprawled next to you.

"Ju', the boys are back, we're gonna eat," you whispered in his ear and Kevin cooed at your proximity from his spot on the blanket, sending a threatening gaze to silence him, which didn't have any effect on the Canadian boy.

Juyeon quietly emerged, suddenly straightening up when he felt he was resting on you, looking all lost and confused. Your friends burst into laughter at his behaviour as he apologised profusely, but you assured him that it was completely fine. His breathing had accelerated, and his ears turned bright red as the laughter didn’t seem to die down. Seeing him like that just because he had fallen asleep on you made your heart flutter, and you allowed yourself to giggle along with everyone.

After putting on your beach dress, you sat down between Younghoon and Jacob, the latter moving to the side as Juyeon sat behind you two in silence when there was more space on the other side of the blanket. The older boy silently giggled, stifling a remark with an amused look that you tried to ignore, asking Eric to give you a soda can.

“I'm fucking starving,” you blurted out as you all threw yourself on your pizza, you and Juyeon eating at a pretty disconcerting speed.

Every single one of you was busy talking and laughing about the incident that happened to some of the boys while you were still at the beach, while a special someone was busy staring at you.

“And then, Chanhee stared at the waiter and they were both confused about what just happened,” Eric explained and you all laughed, Younghoon quickly throwing a glance at his friend next to you, who didn’t have a single reaction since you all started eating.

Juyeon watched you out of the corner of his eye and allowed himself to wipe a piece of tomato on your cheek with the tip of his forefinger, making you turn your head towards him with a surprised look. He explained to you by mimicking the gesture he had just made on your cheek on his and you nodded as a silent thank you, wiping your mouth with the back of your hand.

Half the boys had noticed your little game, constantly looking at each other with understood smirks, but no one dared to say anything and break your little bubble of romance.

"We need to do something for those two, they’re getting mad annoying at playing who’s the most oblivious, they're gonna make me gag," Kevin whispered to Sangyeon, nodding at the two of you. You were too busy glancing at each other and listening to the rest of Eric’s story to hear what they were whispering about. "Just let time do its thing," Sangyeon suggested but received a growl in response, the younger absolutely not convinced.

The entire evening was great, your friends poking fun at Juyeon as the poor boy struggled to keep his eyes open and sit straight due to his exhaustion, shoulders sagged and head falling to the side as he shyly smiled at the teasing. When the sun was long gone and the wind started to pick up, you all decided to go back to the hotel to sleep because you were all exhausted, no matter how hard some were trying to deny it. You helped Younghoon shake the sand off and fold the tablecloths while the others were busy throwing away the leftovers and other rubbish.

All the boys checked that no one had forgotten anything and started walking in direction of the hotel, you bringing up the rear after checking everything back one last time.

Juyeon was drowsily walking and suddenly stopped, waiting for you to catch up with him, letting the other boys take the lead. You shyly smiled at him and kept on walking together, almost tripping over when you felt his hand take yours and hold it tight. He gave you a sweet, tired smile and kept on walking as if what he just did was utterly normal, your hands getting clammy and your heart fastening in your chest for the rest of the walk back to the hotel.

You looked up at him and offered him a sweet smile, to which he answered by squeezing your palm in his and gently move you closer to him. Juyeon felt the same way as you did so he couldn't feel your nervousness, but his behaviour gave you a hint that something will probably change between the two of you, and it was for the best.

[joohyunslittlemonster]

I’m your Rosie

35: Did you do that to get my attention? 41: You just fainted into my arms, it’s hard to believe that you are fine 38: Am I in heaven? No you’re in the hospital Genre: Fluff Wordcount: 1,4k  Pairing: Rosé x Fem!Reader A/N: The first request from the list and also my first request ever! Hope you enjoy, I’ve never done something like this and it’s honestly a bit of a challenge but so much fun. Happy reading! ♥

Being whipped for Park Chaeyoung was something happening quickly. Her sweet personality paired with that pretty face of hers made it almost impossible not to want to give her the world.

You were lucky enough to be in her circle of friends, even without being a part of her famous Idol-World.  Nothing about you was really out of the extraordinary.  A normal girl, working a regular 8-hour job in a coffee-shop where nothing exciting happens. 

Well, that was until you spilled a drink on one of Korea's most beloved celebrities.  It wasn’t your fault, though. What did she expect, walking up onto the counter, ordering that damn Iced Latte? Her face was hidden behind a mask at first, but when you returned with her finished drink, she took it off to thank you properly; and before you were even able to scream the words ‘Oh my God,’ her shirt was full of coffee, and your wish to die on the spot was never so strong.  To your surprise, she didn’t hold it against you, no. 

She ended up apologizing for scaring you. 

After that incident, she became a regular in the store, claiming the coffee was too good to pass up and slowly, but surely you got used to her being around and learned enjoying her company.  Fast forward a couple of months, and you’ve met the rest of Blackpink, without any liquid you could spill in your hands, and most importantly: 

You developed a very unhealthy crush on Rosé and tried everything in your power to prove your worth to her. 

It wasn’t like she asked you to push yourself continually; to her, your friendship was like a “breath of fresh air”; her words.  She quickly noticed how you always compared yourself to all her famous and rich friends, trying to reassure you that she didn’t care that you couldn’t sing or dance or that most of your evenings were spent watching a movie on the couch.  But you were so caught up in your little bubble of overthinking that you overlooked her constant pleas for you to slow down. 

This time was no different. You got that idea of learning how to dance stuck in your head, and so you spent every free minute learning choreographies and having Lisa evaluate them.  Rosé tried to bring you down to earth, but other than that one time you were so keen on writing her a song, she couldn’t reach you.  So all she could do was watch with worry written all over her face how you followed the steps to ‘Boombayah’ while Lisa gave you basic tips on how to improve. 

“(Y/N) I think it’s time for a little pause!”

Rosé yelled over the loud music blaring in the practice room the three of you were currently in. 

You turned around, sweat dripping down your face and your breath erratic. 

She was sitting there, adorning sweatpants and an oversized hoodie, her blonde hair tied up in a ponytail.  The word ‘stunning’ didn’t even do her justice, and all you could think about was how special she was; and how you weren’t. 

“Hey lover girl, I think she’s right. You made some great progress today, but you need rest.”

Lisa spoke lowly, and you weakly shoved her away from you. She’s been onto your true intentions since you asked her to be your mentor and teased you relentlessly for it. 

“No. You can leave if you want to, but I will stay. I want to get this right.”

You said, walking with wobbly legs towards the speaker to restart the song.  Lisa and Rosé exchanged a look, and while Rosé quickly shook her head, Lisa just shrugged her shoulders and got into position. 

“Alright then. 5, 6, 7 - are you okay?”

Lisa took a step forward, her voice laced with concern. You were standing frozen on the spot, all color fading from your face. 

“Hey, what’s going on?”

Rosé sprung up to her feet and sprinted over to you. Blood rushed in your ears, and the whole world around you started to spin. 

“I-I’m not feeling so good.”

You managed to choke out before everything turned black. 

You awoke to the whispers of familiar voices and the feeling of a soft hand holding yours. 

“Shh, I think she’s waking up.”

“She still looks a bit pale, don’t you think?”

“Everyone shut up, (Y/N). Can you hear me?”

You slowly opened your eyes, only to squeeze them shut a second after because of the bright light blinding you.

“Am I in heaven?”

“No, you’re in the hospital.”

You blinked a few times, before turning your head and looking into the faces of Lisa, Jennie, and Rosé. Two of them watched you with a slightly amused smile on their lips, while the blonde girl holding your hand had an unreadable expression on her face. 

“What happened?”

“You scared the hell out of me; that’s what happened.”

Rosé answered while squeezing your hand.  The door opened, and Jisoo came barging in with her hands full of snacks, but she was stopped by Lisa and Jennie, who muttered something about leaving you some space.  Now being alone with Rosé, you tried to look her in the eye, which she avoided, and you grew more worried by the second.

“Rosie, I’m fine.”

You tried to calm the situation.

“You just fainted into my arms; it’s hard to believe you are fine.”

Rosé snapped back, and you almost flinched because of how mad she sounded.  She caught your reaction and mumbled a quick apology before running her free hand through her hair.  An awkward silence settled over the both of you, and you couldn’t help but feel guilty. Guilty for clearly worrying her and how great it felt to hold her hand and have her undivided attention.

“I’m sorry. I should have listened to you and taken a break; I didn’t drink too much the entire day.”

“You should listen to me more in general.”

She said with a sigh.

“This needs to stop (Y/N). I appreciate you trying to impress me or whatever it is you’re doing, but this is proof that you need to look out for yourself. I’m trying so hard to tell you that you don’t need to change and that you don’t need to do the things I do for a living to be a good friend in my eyes.”

“Yeah. A friend.”

You chuckled and immediately felt heat rising into your face. Shit.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

Rosé asked and looked at you with confusion in her eyes as you let go of her hand.

“You don’t get it. All of this time, I’m just trying to prove myself to you. That I’m more than just a boring girl, that...that I maybe can be more than just a...friend.”

You averted your eyes to the ceiling and took a deep breath.

“I’m truly sorry for making you worried.”

“Did you do that to get my attention?”

Rosé’s voice was quiet, she almost sounded hurt, so you quickly answered.

“The fainting? No. The dancing, the terrible singing, the gifts? Yes.”

A few moments passed, where you felt your heart beating in your throat and tears stinging in your eyes; until a small giggle brought your attention back to the girl next to you.  She had her hand before her mouth, but you could see her body shaking with silent laughter.

“Out of every reaction, I never thought that would be it.”

You said while a little smile tugged at the corners of your lips.

“Sorry, Sorry, it’s just...your singing was really terrible; if you wanted to impress me with that, you really should upgrade your game.”

“Rude.”

You scoffed. Rosé reached for your hand again and softly intertwined your fingers, shooting sparks all over your body. She slowly leaned closer until she could put her head onto your shoulder.

“You are so special to me. You would’ve realised that if you would have just payed closer attention. Also, don’t you want to ask me something, (Y/N)?”

You looked down at her and found her already staring up at you, her warm brown eyes making you feel fuzzy inside. 

“Park Chaeyoung, do you want to go on a date with me?”

Rosé smiled that perfect smile of hers, and you could practically feel the butterflies erupting in your stomach. She ghosted her lips over your cheek before pressing a kiss on it, leaving a lipstick mark. 

“Only if you never call me like that again, I’m your Rosie.” 

[nightswithkookmin]

RE HOW BIGHIT MARKETS BTS

Thanks for the question dear.

Marketing is for a lot of things but in BTS's case, I'd say the primary goal of marketing them is to expose the entire group and or the individual members to an audience, a particular audience at a time, to brand them in a way that makes them appealing to that target market- to put it simply.

During one of the recent run episodes, when Jimin performed his dance from Serendipity- which I must say, God he is breathtakingly beautiful when he dances. Serendipity and the choreo is my weakness. If I see anything better than that- hold on, there's filter too. Ayayaya.

Stream Serendipity and Filter🔪

Oh and did y'all see JM's bit in Film out? Omg! I'm afraid I'd have to fly to South K to kiss his talented ass morning, afternoon, evening.

Who's coming?

Anywho, when Jimin performed Serendipity on Run and suggested that was the dance the staff was performing, the members- cough RM, quickly pointed out how he was plugging, self promoting (to Run's target audience)

Run has a different demographic.

When Suga talked about them not being funny on their Let's BTS show on KBS the Host pointed out how they were actually funny in their Run episodes.

A lot of Army(who are already fans of BTS or each individual member) watch Run but not all who watch Run are Army or even listen to BTS songs. So any performance of an individual's music or choreo would attract such a 'unique' viewer who might go on to become that member's stan or bias etc.

Similarly, when a member embarks on a solo project they are exposed to a new or unique audience. That's where most of the solo stans come from.

For V, his fanbase are not just made up of people who enjoy him as a musician but as an actor as well.

He has a strong fanbase in SK outside of 'Army' because of his exposure to the Korean market beyond BTS and this comprises of his musical collaborations with Korean Artists and film companies such as his OST Sweet Night on the series Itaewon class.

It's the same with Suga and IU, his Agust D mixtapes which draws in audiences that are not necessarily into boybands, RM's Mono whixh attracts strong hiphop fans, Jimin's dance collaborations with Taemin for example and his contemporary dance performance which attracts people in the world of contemporary dance and ballet- point in case the black swan performance at the end of the year, Jin and Hobi's MCing etc.

All these projects exposes them to unique audiences and markets outside of Army or BTS's own fanbase.

And I think the best way to understand how this is important or how this affects BigHit's marketing approach is to look at their recent YouQuiz interviews.

Jimin, Jhope and JK were paired to attract aspiring dancers or persons who want to be dancers and learn from these three dance leaders of BTS- or at least they were paired to appeal to them in my opinion.

Tae and RM were equally paired to appeal to creatives and creative minds and persons who are more into composing and writing lyrics and are full of passion and musical geniuses.

Jin and Suga were paired to appeal to mature audiences.

Ten out of ten when any pair is paired in BTS it is for marketing reasons to appeal to certain fanbase or audiences and are often strategic moves unless of course it's to balance things out to not create the impression they are promoting subunits within the group in furtherance of the BTS kumbaya agenda- Team over units or solos.

So Jikook are not gonna be allowed to sit together all the time even if they want to, neither would JinKook, or Sope.

They shake and reshuffle sometimes.

And like Tae said in his 2018 VLive, the company decides who they collaborate in or what market to promote them in.

Tae was allowed to collaborate with Adora on his Chrismas song but not Jimin- which to me is very homophobic but it goes to show the company has a say in who they work with and most importantly which market they work in.

For JK, he's been working his way within the American marke and building a strong fanbase internationally from his English covers of Justin Bieber, Troye Sivan, to his collaboration with Charlie Puth, and most recently Jason Derulo in Savage love- that's a lot of English speaking fanbase he's attracting and appealing to outside of Army.

Tae's English mixtape would achieve a similar feat and draw in a lot of English speaking fans.

Bts did the same with dynamite and coldplay's Fix you.

So by allowing JK to work with renowned Japanese Artists and film companies, collaborating and composing original sound tracks for them such as his Your eyes tell OST, Film out, etc. he is appealing to and drawing in a Japanese audience.

As Hobi explained in his 2019 January Vlive, their mixtapes, solo projects, collaborations with Artists outside of BTS are all ways for them to expand their fanbase individually and build their portfolio.

And these new fans are mostly going to be solo stans who stan him for his music composing abilities but of course some may fall in love with BTS as well and go on to become Army so it's a win win situation.

WOULDN'T THE OTHERS OBJECT

Yes and no.

As long as the company isn't pushing him as a soloist outside of BTS and creating a separate brand with him outside of BTS's own brand I don't think the boys would object to it.

That was the problem they had/have with Jikook. In my opinion.

The company branding Jikook, distinctifying them from the group as a 'couple' subunit, selling their chemistry to fans and advertisers really doesn't and didn't sit well with the group. AT ALL.

In my opinion of course.

You can't create a brand within a brand.

It goes against Bang PD's own objective of prioritizing the team over all else which is what sold the members in the first place.

I just think in JK's case, since 2020, they are just trying to help him find himself and his bearing and his purpose.

He's been trying to find himself since 2020 and he'd talked about losing his passion and had had his passion hijacked and commercialized by the company.

He used to say he didn't know what he was going to do with himself and his life and career after BTS- having him work on music videos, directing, composing, reading these are all ways that they are doing right by him if you ask me.

They are helping him not trying to push their own agendas- which is not to say they might not change their minds about it in the future.

JK is an artist being managed by the company and they owe a duty to him to make the right business decisions for him with his consent- can't stress on the consent bit enough.

Personally, I'm happy about Japan because they are and are shaping out to be queer friendly and have a bit of progressive laws and conducive environments for queer artists to flourish in- if coming out would ruin their careers that's one less worry.

Which by the way I hate anyone who peddles this 'coming out will ruin their careers' nonsense because I can tell you one hundred percent that that is rooted in homophobia and it's not OK.

Don't tell that to no queer people shut up. You are not helping.

I know some say that out of genuine concerns for the boys but PLEASE DON'T. Don't use fear to keep queer people hidden and out of sight. Don't promote closet safety. Rhetorics like that only perpetuate queer invisibility and homophobia- do I need to spell it out to your liberal homophobic ass?!

Coming out is entirely up to them regardless of the risk you think is involved. If they want to take it. They'll take it. It's their choice to make regardless of whatever consequence.

That there are or should be consequences is a problem in of itself.

I don't want to hear 'if JK comes out he's been stupid and reckless and putting Jimin's career at risk'

'If he loves Jimin he wouldn't come out'

Go ahead kiss it😌

If he wants to stay closested respect it. If he wants to come out RESPECT IT TOO.

Support him either ways goddammit!

Y'all gone get me bothered like that huh.

JK POTENTIALLY WITHOUT JIMIN

They both have different career objectives.

I know Jimin says JK is imitating him but chilee JK is his own person. Lol.

Jimin plays too much.

He has his own aspirations.

In 2014 Jimin posted this Christmas song he did with JK. In 2020 he posted his own Christmas song without Jk.

It's not hard to see where his interests in music lie as a musician.

JK covered We don't talk anymore by himself and later did a collaboration with Jimin on the same song. He's done Fools with RM- see where I'm going with this?

Suga said he was more likely to write pop songs for JK but write dance songs for Jimin.

Jk said in the Be interviews bang PD advised him to consider dance performances when writing songs as he himself is a dancer too and need to incorporate in his compositions.

They are two distinct artists and at some point it would become necessary to brand, promote and encourage their uniqueness in their professional lives. They don't got to be tethered to each other all the time.

Personally, I don't think BigHit would want to push official subunits within BTS- yet and it's inclination towards Jikook have always been because of their marketing appeal rather than to further a career objective for both of them.

This goes back to the pairing objectives I talked about earlier. If they are going to pair Jikook professionally as an official subunit within the group it wouldn't be because they are a couple and ought to be together all the time but because it is smart for them to do so business wise.

If their pairing isn't commercially profitable they won't be paired at all- unless of course Jikook themselves want and request to be paired in that way. Know what I mean?

They each signed separate contracts with the company from day dot. They didn't sign on as a unit.

Whether or not they've decided they are a package deal I cannot say- yet, as their new contract just came into effect.

We would have to observe how they are being handled by the company going forward.

HE'D NEVER DO IT WOULD HE

Come now sis...

It's not like he's leaving Jimin😅

Jimin and Jhope were equally sent to Japan for promotion purposes without JK.

Out of all seven, Namjoon is the most promoted member in the international Market not just because he speaks English but because he is often made the spokes person for the group in interviews, at awards straight up to the UN.

Look how happy they all were and how chatty they were at the KBS Let's BTS interview.

I mean they all talked about it. About how they can't say much on foreign forums and often step into Namjoon's shadows.

RM is the most recognized and dare I say the most liked member out of all seven in the international market outside Army and their music profession.

In Japan they all have a chance to be front and center at interviews etc.

It just so happens that JK as it stands is the one member pushing to build a portfolio within that market.

Let's pray he gets mainstream and build a strong presence within the music industry there because we all know he's gonna drag Jimin up there with him😏

Just pay attention to the songs he's written and the parts Jimin sings in them- he makes Jimin shine on those songs.

They have so much potential my God.

Let's support them individually and as a unit.

I purple you and sorry I had to respond here.

Stay gold. Let's keep supporting and rooting for our guys.

Signed,

GOLDY

[unsaidholland]

what a time | t. holland

hello besties, this is a tom fic that has been in the making for a while! a personal favourite trope, tom and musician!reader break up and she writes a song about him! what a time by julia michaels ft. niall horan is used as the reader’s song, definitely go listen to it if you haven’t!

warnings: it’s mostly sad so grab some tissues, fluff at the end

you, like tom, didn’t have a very typical job. while your friends went off to university to get their degrees, you went on to become a musician. that’s how you had met tom. he dmed you one day saying that he loved your music, you said you loved his movies, and the rest was history. he ended up introducing you to so many people over the ten months that you two were together, one of them being niall horan. niall and you exchanged numbers wanting to eventually collab, but neither of you thought that your breakup would be the reason that the two of you were going to release a song together.

after ten months, you and tom called it quits. you made sure the media thought it was mutual. that was the first thing you agreed on when the two of you started dating - if you ever went public and had broken up, it would seem to be a mutual agreement. neither of you wanted the other’s reputation to be ruined. little did the public know, the breakup was anything but mutual. he had broken up with you. you never knew why. he had just said, “it wasn’t working out.” that was all he left you with. that was all you had for closure. funny how forever seemed to last just over ten months, right?

you sat in your living room with a guitar in your hands. you had so much emotion that you had bottled up, and the only way you knew to get it out was songwriting. after messing around with different chords on your guitar, you found a chord progression that you were really confident in. the melody seemed to come naturally, and so your phone began to fill up with voice memos of possible lyrics. 

i think of that night in the park, it was getting dark

and we stayed up for hours

what a time, what a time, what a time

you clinged to my body like you wanted it forever

what a time, what a time, what a time

for you and I

what a time, what a time

for you and I

the chorus came naturally, the verses came next, and before you knew it you had a rough draft of a song. after listening back to the song, you realized that it was missing something. you looked around the living room, sunlight peeking through the sheer, white blinds. after writing for two hours, you decided you needed a snack and a coffee. 

you walked to the coffee shop down the street from your apartment. the coffee shop that you used to go to with tom. as you stood in line to order, your mind couldn’t help but wonder if he came to the shop when he was in town? did he stand in line and think about whether you still went here too? you ordered your iced coffee and pain au chocolat and sat at one of the tables. you chose a table far, far away from where you and tom used to sit. this place would always remind you of him no matter how hard you tried. the warm lights brightened up the room, but it still felt dim without tom. the coffee shop didn’t have that sense of warmth and familiarity that it used to, that tom brought to it whenever you used to go. 

you watched as people walked in and out of the shop. you watched as couples kissed in line as they waited. you watched as people seemed happy. you needed to figure out what was missing with your song, and as you watched two people out on the street argue, you realized you needed a second voice on the track. 

later that night, you asked niall to feature on your song. when you sent him a very rough recording of what you had written, he immediately agreed. the song was raw and real, the song revealed more about your breakup with tom than you could ever say. 

•••

it had been two weeks since you released the song. what a time became popular enough to get you and niall a spot on james cordon’s show. as you were sat on stage and the band started playing the intro, you felt tears well up in your eyes. you couldn’t do it. you walked off stage where niall found you.

“come here,” was all he said. it was all he needed to say. he wrapped his arms around you and rubbed your back as your head sat on his chest. his heartbeat helped to calm you down. you and niall were just friends, but he was like a brother to you, especially after he helped you with the song. “let’s try again, yeah?” he asked you after a few minutes. the crew backstage just watched as he comforted you. you wiped the tears away from your face and nodded.

soon enough you were back on stage and performing the song. you fought back the tears throughout the whole performance, but whenever you felt the tears about to spill over, niall was there to get you through it. when he was close to you, he would hug you or hold your hand, and when he couldn’t he gave you a reassuring look. a look that said, “we’re going to get through this.”  your voice wavered as you sang, but the audience still cheered you on. the emotion that you felt pushed you to finish the performance, because as soon as it was done, the sooner you could get home and cry, cry somewhere that wasn’t in the eyes of the spotlight. 

the episode you were on aired a few days later. you couldn’t bear to watch it, but you tweeted about it to help bring some publicity towards it. little did you know, on the other side of the world, tom was watching it as it aired. he was having dinner at his parent’s house when his dad had turned on the tv to watch the late late show. tom thought nothing of it and sat down on the couch next to the twins. he laughed at the segments, but then he saw you. nikki, knowing it was going to be too much for her firstborn, instinctively went to reach for the remote, but was stopped by tom saying a quiet, “no.”

he watched you as you sang. he watched as you poured your heart out to the world. tom watched you fight back tears that no one else could see, but most importantly, tom knew that he was the cause of this. he was the one who called it off, he was the one who ripped your heart in half, he was the one who caused all your tears, grief, and pain. he could never take that back. tom was too entranced by your performance to realize that he was shedding tears. he may not have been your boyfriend anymore, but he still knew you like the back of his hand. he missed you like a child misses his mother on the first day of school. he needed you the way the ocean needs the moon’s push and pull to create waves. it took you publicly fighting back your tears on stage for tom to realize completely that he had lost something more important to him than anything. 

tom listened to you sing.

you clinged to my body like you wanted it forever, what a lie, what a lie, what a lie.

he wanted you for forever. all he ever wanted was for you to stay in his arms forever, but clearly he lost everything when he broke it off. at the time it all seemed reasonable. he loved you, but he didn’t want to lose your relationship to the distance, so he called it off. tom just never thought that it would hurt this much. being separated by vast oceans didn’t make it any better either. it made everything worse. he couldn’t just go and see you. he needed to fly out to la, find out where you were staying, and find a place for him to stay. and in the case that you did take him back, he needed to change his schedule to make sure he didn’t lose you again, because he couldn’t lose you, not again.

he wiped away the tears that rolled down his flushed cheeks with the cuff of his blue midtown high sweater. as you and niall hugged at the end of the performance he thought about how perfect life was when he held you in his arms. he thought about how he should be the one holding you in his arms. he thought about how he lost everything the day he lost you. it had been a month and a half since the breakup, and he felt like he had been suffering ever since. he needed you, that was the only thing he knew to be true. 

“come here darling,” nikki said, opening up her arms to wrap around her son after getting up to comfort him. he held onto her like his life depended on it. she rubbed his back and placed a tender kiss on the top of his head. 

“i miss her so much.” his voice was breathy, light and filled with air, yet heavy with emotion. “mum i can’t live without her, why did i ever leave her?” he sobbed into her chest. tom didn’t care if the rest of his family was watching him sob over a girl he broke up with, he only cared about you. “i really messed up.” he pulled away to look at his mother’s expression expecting disappointment, but only seeing a soft, warm smile.

“you’re allowed to mess up. you live and you learn. the important thing is what are you going to do about it?” nicola was always a wise woman in tom’s eyes. she always knew what to say and when to say it. not only that, but she was always a good friend to him, not just his mom. she looked into tom’s brown eyes that were only swirling with emotion. deep in thought, tom could only hear his mom’s words roaming around his mind. what are you going to do about it?

•••

less than 36 hours later tom found himself in la. he was on a journey to find you, and this time he wasn’t planning on giving up. he knew where to find you.

you stumbled into your favourite coffee shop as you always did. the coffee in la was different than back home, so whenever you were in la you couldn’t stop the small coffee obsession. you sat down at a table, opening your laptop to answer some emails and get some work done. you may have been sitting alone at a table, but you were comfortable with the space. 

tom had walked in, ordered a coffee and a cookie, and after paying and receiving his order, his eyes scanned the room to find you, which he easily did. you looked ethereal, he thought you were so beautiful despite only wearing jeans and a plain t-shirt. you weren’t done up, but he still thought you were absolutely gorgeous. he mustered up the courage to ask if he could sit at your table, and once the two of you made eye contact it was as if the world stopped for a moment. his chest tightened at the sight of you, and the knot in his stomach had turned into butterflies. he was more nervous than he was at any press conference he had ever been to because if he didn’t do well, he would have lost everything for good.

“please sit,” you said after finding your voice. you shut your laptop, taking it off the table and putting it back into your bag to focus your attention on him. “what are you doing here? i thought you were still in kingston.” small talk was never your specialty. especially since you had so much you wanted to tell him with nowhere to start. 

“i flew out about 36 hours ago. i needed to see you.” tom cut right to the chase. he may have been sleep deprived, being too nervous on the plane and during his layovers to even sleep, but he was thinking clearly when it came to fixing your relationship with him. he needed you back, that was the goal, that was why he flew out in the first place. “yeah, i couldn’t get a direct flight, so i had a layover in toronto. it was cool and all, but all i could think about was seeing you.” tom kept rambling, and as much as you wanted to stop him and get angry with him, you just let him talk. you needed to hear him out. you needed to know if the past month and a half had been hell for him like it was for you. 

“i’m the biggest idiot that could have ever walked the planet, y/n. i shouldn't have broken up with you. i’m really sorry.” he reached out to grab your hands, cupping them in his. his touch was gentle, but so, so warm against your hands. his touch was intoxicating. you would be lying if you said that you didn’t want him, but even after he hurt you, tom was all you wanted. “i need to make things right. i need you back in my life, i need us to get back together. i want you, i’ve only wanted you.” i’ve only wanted you. his words were stitching your heart back together, but you couldn’t forget that he had left you.

“i was scared, so i broke up with you. that is the most idiotic thing i’ve ever done. i didn’t want the distance to hurt us so i needed to break up with you before the distance could break us up, but i’ll give you anything, no, i’ll give you everything if it means we can try again.” tom didn’t care about the people around your table, he just cared about you. he cared about getting you back. the two of you sat in silence, drowning out the noise of the other patrons in the shop. the bustle of the city was suddenly gone as you focused on him.

“do you mean it?” those words were the only thing you could muster out. your mind was all over the place. you looked behind him, at the people walking around the shop, grabbing their drinks and leaving, talking to their friends. your eyes focused back on tom. you focused on how he looked so desperate for you, how he was silently fighting for you as the two of you sat in silence.

“of course i do. i love you y/n.” those latter four words cut the silence like a knife. those four words were the last thing you thought you were going to hear from him, but here he was, saying everything you wanted him to and meaning it. he meant every single word he was saying to you, that much was evident.

“i love you too.”

•••

about a month later, you were scrolling on twitter only to see an article about you and tom getting back together. though the two of you never confirmed it explicitly, it was quite obvious with how much the two of you were spotted together. a few days after he flew out to reconcile with you, you had flown back home to london with him. countless dates were spent before tom had to go to ohio to film his newest project. you were meant to fly out later, needing to finish a few meetings in london about your next album.

you scrolled through your instagram to see a photo of you and tom that he had posted. it was a photo that harrison had taken of the two of you dancing around in the backyard as it was pouring rain. neither of you knew he had taken photos of you until after. the captured moment became both your lockscreen and tom’s lockscreen, and now it was out there for the whole world to see. he had tagged you in it and captioned it what a time for you and i, clearly referring to your song. a smile appeared on your face. you were quick to comment on his picture. when he says “you can stand under my umbrella” but he doesn’t have an umbrella :// if he was going to have fun with this, then so were you.

as your phone blew up, you got a text from tom saying he was taking a break from filming and that he would call you soon. what a time for you and him indeed.

[rockthingsbymeg]

Treasure

Pairing: Izzy Stradlin x reader

Info: Pure fluff; 909 words;

A/N: Not as big as most of my fics, but I hope you guys enjoy it

Izzy flopped down tiredly on his new couch after throwing away the last box with his and Y/N’s belongings. It had taken them a whole month to unpack everything, despite barely having anything in their previous house.

He looked around the room, slowly eyeing all the furniture. He had forgotten what it felt like to have furniture that wasn’t broken or completely falling apart. He had never truly cared about it, but he had to admit that now that he had it, it did feel nice.

What felt even better was to see his girlfriend of three years, Y/N, come into the room looking tired but happy, and stand between his legs, smiling down at him.

“We’re finally down.” She said, looking around the room and then back at him. “Can you believe it? We did it…”

Izzy smiled up at her, taking in all the details of her face. She was the most beautiful and amazing woman he had ever met. To this day, he didn’t know how or why she fell in love with him.

When Izzy didn’t answer and remained looking up at her, she ran the back of her fingers across his cheek and chuckled softly. “Baby? You okay?”

Izzy chuckled as well and nodded. “Yeah, I am…” He answered and gently pulled her on his lap. “I’m more than okay.” He said, pulling her for a gentle kiss.

Y/N let her body melt on top of him, losing herself in the kiss and simply enjoying the happiness and tranquility of the moment.

Izzy pulled back after a bit and kept holding her with his lips pressed against her neck. Y/N ended up being the one to move and break the silence that settled.

“Why don’t you join me in a quick shower, and then I make us some dinner?” She asked, gently brushing his long hair out of his face.

Izzy nodded and let Y/N climb off his lap before getting up himself and following her to the bathroom. Y/N put the water to warm up and began to undress. Izzy followed, but his eyes remained on Y/N’s body, observing every detail.

Izzy knew that most of the time he acted cold and distant as if he didn’t care, as if she meant nothing to him. But he also knew that Y/N understood him.

She had always been able to see right through him, to know how he actually felt and understand why he acted the way he did.

And most importantly, she had never judged him for it.

When he first realized she saw past the unfazed, cool façade, he was scared, as much as he didn’t want to admit it. Axl saw right through him too, but he had been Izzy’s friend for years, and he trusted him. Y/N had come into his life, in a rush, pretty much like everything else since he had moved to L.A., and knocked him off his feet, leaving him to figure out how she had begun to mean so much to him in such a short period of time.

He was deep in his thoughts like he would be every so often, when Y/N gently touched his arm, bringing him back to earth.

“Baby, you’re staring,” She said in a soft voice. “Is everything okay?”

Izzy just gave her a small smile, one that always let her know he was being sincere. “Yeah, I was just thinking.”

Y/N nodded and held his hand, leading him under the hot water of the shower.

Izzy took the soap while Y/N took the shampoo and, rather than washing their own bodies, they began to wash each other, Izzy’s soft yet calloused hands moving slowly across her body, while hers began to massage the soap into his hair. Y/N had a blinding smile on her face, one that always made Izzy smile no matter what.

While they showered, they were constantly leaning towards each other and sharing tender kisses. It was a soft moment, something quite rare between them, and each time it happened it made Y/N’s heart almost leap out of her chest. Izzy was not the type of person who enjoyed being cuddly and intimate often, and that made these small gestures even more meaningful.

They left the shower half an hour later, bodies finally rid of all the sweat and relaxed after spending so long moving stuff around and tidying.

They changed into some fresh, comfortable clothes and made their way into the kitchen. Y/N moved to the counter while Izzy made a quick stop in their room and then sat down at the table with his acoustic guitar on his lap. He began strumming away soft melodies, humming as incomprehensible lyrics as he did so.

“New material?” Y/N asked curiously, not taking her eyes off the vegetables she was chopping.

Izzy shook his head, despite knowing Y/N was not looking. “Not really.” He shrugged and continued playing. “It’s not the sounds we want for Guns.”

Y/N nodded understandingly and let him focus again on playing. What she didn’t know about the song was that it was dedicated to her, and it was Izzy’s way of getting out his deepest feelings towards her.

He was not sure he would ever finish the song or even admit to Y/N that it was about her, but it was still his favorite song he had ever written. It was sincere, heartfelt. It was his treasure, much like Y/N was.

——

Thank you so much for reading. Likes, reblogs, comments and any kind of way you show me you liked this are endlessly appreciated💛

Requests are closed.

Full masterlist, Guns N’ Roses masterlist and works in progress.

Taglist: @curly-hudson; @agroupiewhore; @littlemisscare-all; @metalheartofgold​

[mikaze-discord]

Class S: Love letters

This is the Class S+ Cecil love letters!! 

Please enjoy under the cut

TOKIYA ICHINOSE 

From Riri:

Maybe it was his midnight-blue hair, or perhaps it was his ocean eyes, but the very moment I laid my eyes upon him my mind immediately thought, “Wow, he’s very good looking… charming... I really like his vibe.” That was the first reason why he piqued my interest, rather, the initial reason why I fancied him. My eyes were drawn to him and the fact that Kay bombarded me with a truckload of his pictures didn’t help at all, I just fell deeper into the hole. But as if that wasn’t enough, she started spamming me with utapri songs and I fell in love immediately. They are all such good singers but there’s one of them who sticks out to me the most, as expected, it’s Tokiya. His voice has this intricate and refined softness that seemed to caress my ears and touch my soul. He has such a sweet (and might I add a handsome) voice, kudos to Miyano Mamoru for that.

So I started watching the anime and through that, I got to know him better. At first, he seems cold with an air of loneliness and uneasiness dawning on him. But as the series progresses, I discovered that he’s a good-natured, warm, and dedicated person who loves singing and music with all his heart and all. He’s hardworking, dedicating everything to his craft. He has pride in it, so when he was told that his singing has no ‘heart’ it affected him a lot. That caused a lot of distress in his system, and the fact that his company is pushing him to pursue other things than being a singer added to that. His passion for his craft is burning, a fire that no one could put out. That’s one of the things that I love about him. He’s dedicated to everything he does. He’s a perfectionist but he’s also a caring person who cares a lot about the starish members. He’s genuinely a good person but that doesn’t mean he’s perfect. He strives for improvement and development all the time. He helps the members whenever they need. Most importantly, his attitude towards his passion is respectable and admirable.

I might’ve said a lot of things but I guess that only means I love a lot of things about him. He’s such a beautiful soul that inspires me to be more dedicated to my passion, to make my dreams come true no matter what it takes. His path towards his dream was rough, it wasn’t all sunshine and rainbows but that’s life, isn’t it? Despite that, he kept walking towards his dream. He’s admirable, respectable, and irresistibly loveable. That being said, I love all the things that made his character; that made Tokiya Ichinose be the kind of character that he is right now.

PS. Miyano Mamoru played a big part too. His insane talent gave life to Tokiya’s character.

From @poorlydrawnutapri:

When I first watched the Utapri anime like 6 years ago, having a best boy didn't cross my mind. At first, I was just most interested in Tokiya out of all the boys because I just thought he looked cool. I liked how mysterious he seemed and also, his hair, probably just because it was blue tbh. Either way, good design.

However, what really got me attached to him wasn't his looks. I then liked Tokiya's serious personality. I like how he starts off cold and stoic but how throughout the games and anime, he slowly softens up. I didn't just like his personality, I could also relate to his perfectionism and hard-working side, even when he exhausts himself, which is something I admit I also have. I continue to relate to him now after all this time, and that's why he's such a good character to me.

Besides that, his songs are nice to listen to and he has just a very pleasant voice. It's nice just to go listen to his voice after a long day. In a way, liking Tokiya also got me into the whole Utapri franchise: made some friends, made a couple of good memes, all that kinda stuff.

Also, I feel like it's a crime not to mention this so: he thicc. Like, dang, no wonder the guy only eats salads because all the fats he eats goes straight to that ass of his. (I am sorry that you had to read that.)

Overall, I just think he's neat. To me, he's relatable and has a nice character development. Tokiya is and will continue to be my best boy. :)

REN JINGUJI 

From @incorrect-jinguji-ren:

Ren Jinguji, the 5th member of Starish is without any shame my favorite character of the Uta no prince sama series. Though often disregarded Ren is and always will be my most favorite and I firmly believe that he has one of the most, if not the most depth in his character. I love Ren a lot however because of his surface charismatic attitude he is usually labeled as a “playboy” or a “lothario”. This is not correct and it should never define him, as he actually is one of the most gentle and compassionate characters of the series. Ren has a very deep surface characterization and personality that is never usually recognized unless you truly take the time to understand WHY Ren acts the way he does, and WHY he makes the choices that he makes. My favorite part about loving characters is being able to accept them for their demons and embrace what others would see as the “imperfections” in them. That Is the best way to truly love them. I love Ren because of his motives, choices, and most of all his passionate loving heart. Although the pain he hides and the personality of who he really is, is hidden under a mask of charisma, he never loses himself deep within.

He’s misunderstood, but he’s beautiful. He’s so deep, from the everlasting devotion to loving his passed on mother, to always cherishing memories and the past bond he had with his childhood best friend Masato, to going against what his brother wants of him because he wants to fight to have a choice and to be passionate about something that he wants to love, because HE wants to love it. Ren didn’t have the love that a lot of people had at such a young age, he made a path for himself and along the way succumbed to the human faults that we all falter from within the hardest times in our life or even dicult events. He almost gave up, just as I know many of us had almost done before, as I know and can relate to, and still do now.

But he dusted himself o and picked up where he left o, making himself happy from once the feeling of being a hollow shell with no reason why he even existed to realizing that the most important thing in the world to him was cherishing the people who made him see the world in colors and seeking the choices that had been stripped from him at such a young age. He broke free from the chains of his family, his past, and his regrets to spread a beautiful pair of rose wings, his own wings to fly. And I hope he always flies. I will always love him, and wish nothing but the best for him whatever that be.

From @chips-and-vodka:

Ren Jinguji- the sexy, charming and flirty member of the STARISH boys. The youngest of the Jinguji family, a troubled child who grew up without a mother. A person who possesses many charms and is blessed with the gift of beauty. A red rose he was, beautiful yet his thorns are to be avoided. Beneath his passionate and seductive mannerisms there is a boy that craves genuine affection, from the one he truly adores and cherishes.

Ren Jinguji to me initially was one with a beautiful, attractive deep baritone, who is voiced by none other than the legend- Suwabe Junichi himself. The voice is an accurate fit of how this stereotype of a charming bishie should be, youthful and sensitive, and at times warm and seductive. His portrayal brings out the appeal of the character, the emotions and thoughts a troubled young adult such as the ‘useless third son’ lived through. Many would see him as a romantic one, one who showers those around him with attention and passion. Within however lives a rebellious soul who distrusts many, but still somehow desires that ray of sunshine that brightens his lonely soul.

Ren Jinguji is one that deserves real love, someone who appreciates him for who he is.

SYO KURUSU

From Jules:

Why do I like Syo, huh? Well, there are a lot of reasons! Some of them are more personal ones. First of all, Syo has always been my best boy, since UtaPri (the anime) exists. So ten long years now.

His fashion style is the first thing I noticed and it immediately intrigued me. I remember that my first thought, after seeing him in season one, was “Woah, he looks really cool!” even though Syo was just in his school uniform! I think what also made me interested in him was his energetic persona. The way he looked up to Ryuya Hyuga and wanted to follow in his footsteps was really sweet to me as well. Syo’s enthusiasm and positive attitude actually encouraged me to become stronger in a way too, if I’m being honest. I, personally, have always found his songs motivating and they made me feel better. I really came to love Syo in his episode in season one. When he talked about his childhood and how weak he was, I really felt with him. From that moment on I cheered him on and Syo definitely became my favorite character. My interest never wavered over the next seasons either.

I also have personal reasons why I love him so much. I just feel very connected and relate to him a lot, y’know? We have quite a few things in common. Syo and I have the same eye color, we have both played the violin since we were little, and were born weak and with pretty much the same health and heart issues. I like to say that Syo “saved” me, which is true. There is also the fact that the blonde and I are both on the shorter side (and regularly get teased for it), too! Though, I’m even a little shorter than him.

But to be more positive again, there is just so much more to him than meets the eye at first! Syo is more than just the stereotypical short sporty character. He really cares for his friends and wants the best for them. Syo’s friendship with every STARISH member is different but still close. He’s also protective of the ones around him. Syo really cares about his little twin brother too, which can be seen in the games and the few times he talked about him in the anime. Syo’s big heart easily balances out his, sometimes, tsundere behavior and I love him for that. This blonde idol is just a great guy and deserves all the love he’s getting and more.

Seriously, stan Syo Kurusu, guys!

From Vic:

Syo Kurusu is my favourite idol within the utapri games and any other form of media pertaining to the franchise. He is my favourite idol because of several factors, one of which being that his voice actor is Hiro Shimono, who voices Zenitsu from Demon slayer and Lucifer from “Devil is a part timer”. Syo is a very outgoing character and is talented in many aspects athletically. Born with a heart disease, he continues to persevere throughout the myriads of life’s problems in front of him.

He’s extremely outgoing and is proficient in the martial art of Karate and desires to strengthen his body more than what it is currently. He is best friends with Natsuki and can communicate with each other proficiently. Syo is my favourite character within the franchise because of his resolve, perseverance and great chemistry with Natsuki and his teammates. Hiro Shimono did the character justice by making his voice one of young, adventurous and energetic. With that said, Syo is a character I truly enjoy within the franchise and wish to see more of him.

CECIL AIJIMA 

From Anon:

Greetings, princes and princesses, and welcome to a world of princes, questionably talking cats, and magic! I’m of course talking about Cecil Aijima, our foreign prince of UtaPri! So, why do I like Cecil Aijima? It’s borderline ridiculous, but it’s because of Cecil’s birthday. More specifically, Cecil’s Birthday Cruise card. But, I should start at the beginning.

Back when I first watched the anime, I thought Cecil was a little bit of a brat towards literally everyone, and one of my least favorites at the time. After watching through the rest of the anime though, I started to like him a lot more than I did before. To me, he had matured a lot after season 2, and never turned back to that bratty self. And so, when playing SL, he might not have been my favorite, but I didn’t hate him. Then, that one fateful day, I decided to pull in his birthday gacha. To my surprise, I had gotten the card in my first pull! Then the story dragged me into the Cecil Appreciation Group. I thought the story was incredibly cute. Then I got more Cecil cards so I could read more stories. Then the cycle repeated itself again. And now, well, if I’m writing this, I think you know what happened to me afterwards. I’ll be here, doing my best for him.

From Eden: 

The boy with childish like demeanor but continues to have a heart of gold for his friends and wonderful composer.

I remember first watching Utapri in middle school and questioning. "Well shit- this is my life now..." and I didn't really have a favorite character at the time. I was always bouncing between characters like Syo, Otoya, even the teachers. However it was season 2 that made me realize who my true favorite was. Despite his at first cocky nature when he was first introduced, Cecil to me was amazing! His singing was magical, his origins even more fascinating. You wouldn't think Utapri would turn that down the magic route but it somehow did.

As the seasons went on, and as I got more into the series, he just became more of a love to me. His kindness and child-like nature and curiosity, he felt different than the other characters.

I love the other characters, yes but him?

Something about him just felt right! He not only seems to be a protector for those he cares about but also feels like he would be the best person to be around. Always wanting to do anything new and exciting just to peak his curiosity and to learn more. Ever since then, he has always been my favorite. The one and only Annapolis Prince, Aijima Cecil.

[heloflor]

Fun facts to notice about Cavendish and Dakota’s personalities

So most of this is probably stuff that a lot of people already noticed but I still wanted to compile it. And this list is way longer than I thought it would (did this post accidentally became a character analysis/deconstruction ? Maybe ?). One last thing : “fun” is a very loose term here.

- When he’s excited/very happy about something, Cavendish becomes touchy. For example, you have the last minute of “Time Out”, the scene with Professor Time near the end of the PnF crossover and the resolution of “Managing Murphy’s Law” (the episode where they discover the memory eraser machine). On the same vein as “Time Out”, there’s the beginning of “Abducting Murphy’s Law”.

He also seems to be touchy when he’s nervous, as we see in “Snow Way Out”, though he seems more to bite his nails or hold his hands a certain way when nervous. Also, Dakota never really reacts when Cavendish grabs him (which I find hilarious and adorable; it’s like it was a normal thing for him).

Finally, one could argue that he can get touchy when sad, given the last minute of “Snow Way Out” (Cavendish be like “Sir this is my emotional support husband” everytime he feels a strong emotion that isn’t anger/annoyance), but it only happens once, or Dakota is the one reaching out when Cavendish’s feeling down.

- On a related note to that first point; and though it goes without saying because everyone in the fandom already knows it : Cavendish and Dakota basically have no physical boundaries when it comes to each other. They constantly get into each other’s personal space without warning, with the other not being bothered in the slightest. Like their first physical contact is literally Dakota putting his hand over Cavendish’s (“Smooth Opera-tor”) and none of them seem to care about it, as if it was normal.

They also seem to be the characters who hug and get into each other’s arms the most and, if we were to put every character in pairs (and by pair I mean that for the main trio, it would be three pairs in total) and count how many physical contact every pair had, Dakota and Cavendish would either be the ones with the most contact or very close to the first (since they don’t show up in every episode but when they do appear, they touch at least once in almost every episode).

- Another thing that everybody already noticed but still : that whole gimmick with Dakota explaining something/a joke until he’s cut by Cavendish saying “I get it” (gimmick that they kind of lost in season 2).

- While Cavendish acts in a way that makes him seem very self-centered, every time he and Dakota find themselves in a dangerous situation, Cavendish’s thoughts are first and foremost on Dakota’s wellbeing. Examples : at the beginning of “The Island of Lost Dakotas”, when Cavendish sees the construction site thing fall, the first thing he says is “You [Dakota] could’ve been hurt !”; in “Fungus Among Us”, he calls out for Dakota when the latter tries to run away after eating the small pistachions; in the PnF crossover, he keeps saying “be careful” when Dakota tries to get a ‘time clock’ but most importantly he puts himself in front of Dakota when attacked by a Pistachion, with his facial expression clearly showing that he expects to die, and when Dakota scolds him for it, Cavendish defense shows that he would have no hesitation going back in time to protect Dakota. Finally, in “Disco Do-Over”, he shows concern when Dakota’s being beaten by the old lady; during this season he ghosts Dakota with the excuse of wishing to protect him; and in the last episode of season 2, right before the “I fall down” song, Milo comments on the team’s looks, which brings Cavendish to say “Prepared and Protected”. And as he says “protected”, Cavendish knocks on Dakota’s helmet, as if, when he says “protected”, he’s mostly thinking about Dakota being protected.

- Cavendish and Dakota act differently in public and in private. When in public, Cavendish has that ‘serious’ and ‘done with your shit’ attitude, almost acting all-mighty. But when in private, he’s shown to be much nicer but also drops the confident façade and shows his fears and insecurities. For example, his panic in “Snow Way Out”. As for him being nicer, there’s the fact that he calls Dakota a ‘meanie’ in the Halloween episode, which is an improvement over “We’re Going to the Zoo”. In general, it also feels like he sees Dakota as an equal, compared to how he treated him at the beginning of the show.

As for Dakota, he acts lazy and laid-back in public (to the point where he sometimes reminds me a bit of Sans. Seriously) but, in private, he’s grumpier and talks about what bothers him.

The best example for this dynamic is at the beginning of “Perchance to Sleepwalk”, with Dakota complaining about Block not believing them about the Pistachions and Cavendish actually trying to comfort Dakota.

You know, this difference of dynamic is actually pretty sweet. As I said, Cavendish has a tendency to act like some villain who bosses around his underdog, especially during the first episodes. But the way they act in private shows that their relationship is actually much healthier than that. Also, the way Cavendish expresses his insecurities and Dakota vents to him shows that there’s a lot of communication between them, which can explain how they were able to keep up such a strong relationship for so long. The two of them trust each other, care for each other and view each other as equals. Though, I have to admit, this difference in behavior also really fuel my headcanon that the two had been married for years but had to get used to hide their relationship due to travelling in the past (and the reason why they call each other by their last name is because Cavendish noticed that people used to do that in the 18th century with people who aren’t family, so he convinced Dakota that they should try doing that to hide their relationship better; because let’s be honest, if there’s something between them, they are really bad at keeping it a secret).

- A short one, but Cavendish softens as the first season progresses. At the beginning, he mostly has that ‘all-mighty know-it-all’ attitude and acts like Dakota was his underdog, though there were some signs that Dakota wasn’t letting himself being walked over, the best example being “Murphy’s Lard”.

Then, after “Time Out”, Cavendish starts being nicer, showing more appreciation for Dakota and even showing some amusement about the bet in “We’re Going to the Zoo”. Finally, after “Missing Milo”, Cavendish completely softens up and becomes the character we’re used to see.

- Dakota seems to act laid-back as a counter point to Cavendish’s irritation. When you think about it, the times when Dakota is the most laid back are the times when Cavendish is the most irritated. The best example for this has to be “Abducting Murphy’s Law”. At the beginning of the episode, Cavendish goes on a rant about their job and you can see Dakota, who was frustrated two seconds ago, close his eyes for a few seconds. And when he reopens them, he starts talking about eating lunch. Then, when Cavendish calls him out on his attitude, Dakota becomes serious again to give Cavendish a reality check, only to then ask Cavendish if he wants food. In a way, it feels like Dakota uses his laid-back personality as a way to soothe Cavendish, to try to make his less tense.

- Cavendish seems to have a pretty low self-esteem. This is something that I’m pretty sure everyone has already picked on, but I still feel the need to mention it for one reason. First off, for those who haven’t noticed, basically Cavendish is borderline obsessed with saving the world and being someone important, and the fact that Dakota seems to be a better time-traveler than him probably doesn’t help (“Time Out”). This would also explain his need to give Dakota orders while on mission.

But one thing I want to mention about Cavendish’s desperation to be important is the PnF crossover. Indeed, in this episode, there’s a moment when Cavendish is ready to get himself killed to save Dakota (as mentioned earlier). But thing is, Cavendish’s facial expression bothers me in this scene. He looks resigned, as if knowing that he’s going to die, but at the same time, I feel like his action is some kind of cry for help or cry for attention.

But why would he suddenly feel this way ? Simple : the island of lost Dakotas. As I said, Dakota is a better time agent than Cavendish, which is something Cavendish seemed to have learned to accept, probably helped by Dakota letting him be the boss. But when he discovered the island, Cavendish also discovered just how much of a better person Dakota was. And yes, Cavendish was genuinely touched by what Dakota did, it clearly made him happy. But at the same time, it could’ve created some strong insecurities. After all, he just discovered that Dakota was willing to sacrifice his life hundred of times for him, while all he did was being an ass while on the job. So with that in mind, it’s possible that Cavendish wanted to prove himself to be a protector too and prove it to/repay Dakota, using the first opportunity he could to try showing that; being willing to give his life to show he can be great as well.

But hey, all this is just speculation from someone who almost only writes angst so what do I know.

- Dakota’s a mess during the second half of season 2, but it’s pretty justified given the circumstances. First off, when I say that he’s a mess, I mean that for a guy who’s always chill and in a funny mood, he has no patience whatsoever when interacting with Heinz (though you could argue that he already found Heinz annoying; and there might still be some disappointment regarding the whole ‘Professor Time’ situation). There’s also the episode “Escape” in which Dakota keeps switching between being sad to angry to hopeful (the hope in his eyes when Heinz starts the clone machine…) to miserable/hopeless. We also see him get up quickly, accidentally knocking Cavenpuss in the process and not giving a single shit about it. But yeah, someone please give this poor man his husband back (and I could say “someone please give him a hug” but he does get one in the next episode so…).

I swear you could make a drinking game out of all the times Cavendish’s name is said in this episode alone.

As for the justification of him being a mess, reminder that Cavendish has a track record of dying and Dakota not only has no idea where the guy is but he can’t go back in time as well, meaning that, if Cavendish dies, it will be permanent.

- In “Picture Day”, there’s that scene with Cavendish and Dakota ‘cuddling’ for warmth after arriving in the wrong place. During this small moment, Dakota has a face as if he was chattering his teeth but his teeth doesn’t actually move, giving him a borderline panicked expression. Two interpretations here : 1. It’s an animation error. 2. It’s probably the first time the two are in a dangerous place since their lost their job. In other words, this might be the first time Cavendish could potentially die since they lost the ability to time travel. So what if Dakota’s expression is from realizing just how mortal Cavendish now is, and how powerless he is to stop death ?

- Dakota doesn’t seem to follow a dream or want much from his life. As said before, most of the time, Dakota is pretty laid-back and lazy. The only time he mentions a life goal is in “Time Out” with the Mississippi purchase. But overall, Dakota just acts like he was satisfied with his life, despite not liking his job in season 2 and despite the small ‘apartment’, and seems like he just wants to have fun and be with Cavendish. Heck, in “School Dance”, he admits that he has no idea what the plan is, he’s just following Cavendish around. On that note, he also seems lazy regarding his job as a time agent because he knows that what he does doesn’t really matters when you can just go back in time and fix it (the Sans vibes are coming back !). So yeah, Dakota feels like a guy who accomplished what he wanted to do with his life and is now just want to enjoy his time and be with his husband Cavendish.

- Finally, I know everyone already noticed this, but Dakota has that tendency to just stare at Cavendish with a smile or a smirk while Cavendish is ranting. I’m just mentioning it because it’s adorable.