#I’ll link the story once I get the masterlist ready

[a-small-writer-in-a-big-world]

My Heart is Yours

Pairing: Simon "Ghost" Riley x f!reader

Words: 6.3k

Warnings: extreme fluff, maybe a tiny bit of angst? tension? this is just very fluffy because he needs it

Synopsis: It's Simon's birthday and somethings changed between you two...

Link to The Roommate Series Masterlist

You are currently reading part 2 of “The Roommate Series”

You were up earlier than normal two days in a row but this time you had woken up on your own. Usually on the weekends you slept in, enjoying the fact that you didn't have to go to class or do work, dozing in and out of sleep as you listened to your roommate go through his morning before you joined him. However, this weekend was different than most and it was hard for you to want to stay in bed.

For one, Simon was home. You have gone through many weekends without him, so when he was here it was hard for you to justify staying in bed when you wanted to spend time with him. You learned very quickly that you could never take the time spent with him for granted, not when he might be called back into work randomly and then you’d be left alone again. 

Truthfully it was a double edge sword. The more time you spent with him the harder it was to watch him leave but that was the price to pay when you let yourself get attached to a man who disappeared for months.

Another reason was because it was Simon’s birthday.

You were honestly more excited about it than he was. To him, his birthday was just another day but to you it was a day to make things right, to make things better from the vague stories he gave you about the way he grew up.

It was also a chance to have fun with him and to just relax. You didn’t pass up on those opportunities.

You had plans for dinner before you both got drunk off whiskey and any other alcohol you had in your fridge to watch movies. You also still had to make him a cake but more importantly you still had to wrap the gift you had gotten him.

The door to your room was closed but you still glanced at it as if Simon would appear out of thin air before you pulled his gift out from underneath your bed. 

In your hand was a travel sized joke book, one that had the really bad puns and dad jokes in it but it was the only thing that you could think of to get him that he would actually use. Even if you knew a lot about your roommate, he was difficult to shop for because he had everything he already needed and never thought about what he wanted.

“Just tell me something to get you!” You begged as you both walked through the aisles of the grocery store yesterday.

“I don’t want anything.” He shrugged and you huffed. 

“If you don’t tell me I’m going to get you something you won’t like.”

“I’m sure I’ll live.”

Simon would never tell you but it really didn't matter what you got him for his birthday. He would like whatever you got him because if it was something from you he’d cherish it until he died.

You opened the front of the book to make sure the birthday card you got him was still in there before you heard Simon walk past your room. You somehow had woken up before him and you listened to him shut the door to the bathroom before you let out a short breath.

You put the book back underneath your bed and got dressed. You tried to curb your excitement and instead worked through your head to come up with a plan to get him out of the apartment.

Even though he knew what you had planned you still wanted to act as if it was a surprise.

You left your room once you were dressed and made your way to the bathroom, noting that the door was cracked open for you. It was part of the routine you both had set up when he was home and happened to be in the bathroom when you had to get ready for class.

“Happy birthday!” You swung the door open and stood in the doorway with a grin.

Simon was brushing his teeth but gave you a grunt that sounded like a ‘thank you’. He seemed to have just woken up; his blond hair was tousled from sleep and he stared at you with bleary eyes. He was also still in his pajamas which consisted of just sweatpants since the man was practically a space heater and couldn’t wear a shirt to sleep. 

His entire upper body was covered in scars that you were sure had stories to them. It was uncommon for you to see them but sometimes you got a glimpse which struck something deep within your chest. However, right now you were just happy that he truly didn’t have any new scars. 

There was something strangely domestic about the sight of him brushing his teeth while you stood watching him. It felt like something that was meant to be, something that was natural to the apartment and to you both. It warmed your chest, softening the grin as it settled into you again that he was truly back home.

“I see you slept well.” You said and he didn’t have the heart to disagree. “Feel any older?”

“Pass.” He grumbled after he spit into the sink and washed out the fluoride with water.

You giggled and watched him begin to wash his face, unbothered by your presence. You were still running through ideas in your head about how to get rid of him for a few hours before you decided to play the safe route.

“What’re your plans today?” You wondered, trying to not sound suspicious.

“Get drunk and watch movies.” He reminded you and you hummed in response.

“You mean you don’t have anything else planned?”

He turned the water off and patted his face dry with a towel, turning to you with a suspicious look in his eyes when he was finished. It only worsened when you gave him a smile and he let out a long sigh from his chest. 

“You want me out of the flat.” He stated and you decided that it was time to be truthful.

“Just for a few hours.” You gave him a sheepish smile when he sent you an annoyed look. “It’d do you good to go out.”

“I went out yesterday.”

A soft huff left your mouth as you watched him hang the towel back up and he raised his eyebrows expectantly. You knew that it would’ve been hard to get him out the apartment, he was a homebody who practically confined himself to four walls when he was home. It never bothered you but right now you wished he at least had the motivation to go outside.

“You could go visit your friends?” You suggested even though in your entire time living with him you’d never seen or heard about him having any.

“No.” He didn’t hesitate and you sent him a look.

“At least think about it, geez.”

Simon smiled, it was small but it brightened your mood immensely, as he ran his fingers through his hair in an attempt to tame it. It had gotten longer since he was gone, the longest you had seen it, and he pulled on a few of the strands to test the length. He didn’t look bad with it that long in your opinion but you assumed by the way he was staring at it through the mirror with intense concentration that he wanted it to be a shorter length. 

“I can pay for your haircut.”

“I prefer cutting my own hair.”

You groaned from his difficultness, not annoyed but you had hoped this would go easier. You weren’t sure if he was doing it on purpose to toy with you or if he genuinely didn’t want to leave the apartment. In hindsight, you couldn’t really blame him since he had gotten back yesterday and most likely just wanted to sit around and enjoy not having to be at his job.

Simon made his way over to you and leaned against the doorframe, his tired eyes staring down at you with confusion as he crossed his arms. Up this close, it was really hard to deny just how big he was and it took everything in you to not stare super long at him.

He seemed to have gained more muscle since you had last seen him and yet he hadn’t thinned down much either. Whatever he did for his job made him physically fit and you wondered if that was the reason why he always ate so much.

Not that you were complaining.

His eyes softened as you made eye contact and they bounced around your face as he leaned forward ever so slightly, making it so there was only a few inches between the two of you.

You were prepared for him to stare at you for a long time before he spoke.

“Why do you want to surprise me if I know what you’re doing?” He wondered and continued to stare at you as if he could read your mind.

“You don’t know everything.” You teased and his eyebrows knitted together. “Like the gift I got you.”

Simon’s eyes widened slightly and he stood up, causing you to bite back a few giggles. He tried to hide his excitement but you could see it in the way his eyes had brightened and his usual serious face had gotten happier just at the mention of a gift. 

It was cute, you couldn’t help but look at him with a warm chest as it was almost like looking at a kid who was just told they’d get ice cream.

“You got me something?” He sounded surprised it made you smile more.

“Mhm.” You nodded and he seemingly held his breath in anticipation. “But you’re not allowed to have it until after we have cake.”

You watched him deflate with slight disappointment before his eyes shot over to your room. You immediately knew what he was thinking about and you sent him a warning look that you hoped would deter him from even daring to search through your room for his gift.

Even if the dinner and the cake wasn’t a surprise, you wanted to keep his present a secret because you were honestly a little worried it wasn’t good enough and you still wanted to have the time to be able to potentially get something different for him.

“Okay, let’s compromise.” You said, trying to get him to forget about the gift, and continued when he looked back at you. “After lunch you leave while I make the cake and then you can come back once I start making dinner.”

Simon thought it over for a moment before he nodded. 

“I’ll help you make dinner.” He added but you shook your head.

“You’re not supposed to help, it’s your birthday.”

“It’s my birthday so I get to do what I want.”

You gasped and stared at him with shock, watching as a triumphant smile stretched across his face. Of course he would figure out a way to use your own arbitrary rules against you for his benefit. You were honestly surprised he hadn’t thought to do it earlier but maybe he was waiting for the right opportunity to catch you off guard.

He was smart, too smart to fall for you silly rules and play along with you.

You pursed your lips together as he looked down at you. You pretended to be offended, giving him a fake glare that couldn’t even be mistaken for anger as you fought back a smile.

“Oh, you think you’re so clever.” You poked him on the chest and watched him tense up slightly before he leaned more into your space.

“I do.”

You scoffed, shaking your head slightly as you placed your hands on your hips. You narrowed your eyes at him, watching as amusement twinkled in his eyes. You focused hard on them, knowing that if you didn’t you would be too enticed by the fact that you could smell the fresh mint on his breath that made you dare to think about what it would be like to press a kiss to his lips in this moment. How you could easily take his face into your hands and run your fingers across the blond stubble on his cheeks, tracing every scar that peppered his otherwise clear skin. 

Instead you looked into his dark brown eyes, finding that you were practically swallowed up in the color of bitter coffee and earth. A void of hidden emotions and an exhaustion that seemed to always plague him yet there was comfort within them expanse of darkness. There was warmth that blanketed you as you stared into his eyes, a sense of safety and stability that you couldn’t find anywhere else, only within the confines of the man who stood in front of you.

It was almost too much, too intense to be looking into his eyes like this. Normally you couldn’t do it for longer than a few seconds but doing so now made you feel almost dizzy, like he was taking the air from your lungs for himself.

And yet couldn’t get enough of him. He could be melded inside of you, his entire soul could be mixed with yours and it still wouldn’t be enough.

“Fine.” You cleared your throat when you noticed that your voice was shaking slightly. “You can help but just remind yourself that it’s your birthday.”

“Fine.” He playfully rolled his eyes before he gently pushed you back. “Go. I need to take a shower.”

“You brush your teeth before a shower? Weirdo.”

Simon sent you a look, still with the hint of playfulness, before he shut the door and it was as if you could breathe again. You stared at the door, taking in the moment you just had with him before the shower turning on shook you out of your thoughts.

You glanced at the door one more time before you moved towards the kitchen to make some breakfast.

~

Shooting whiskey has never been easy for you. The brown liquid burned your throat and settled in your chest long enough to give you an unpleasant shiver throughout your entire body. It was hard to keep back the water in your eyes and the cough as you downed a shot, chasing that funny feeling that made the world spin and everything a lot less stressful.

You had your own drink but you couldn’t deny Simon when he offered the last three shots of whiskey to you, finding that he could be persuasive when he wanted to be.

Both of you sat on the couch in front of the tv, some kind of movie that Simon hadn’t seen was playing in the background but it had been quickly abandoned after the last few shots. Instead of watching, both of you were preoccupied with each other, talking about everything that you could. 

Well, you were doing most of the talking in between shots and sips of a mixed drink while Simon listened. He sipped on his second glass of whiskey but would occasionally join you for a shot when he felt like he was behind you with how drunk you already were.

He wasn’t sure if it was because he was taking it slow and you weren’t or because he was a heavy drinker, but he definitely knew you were having more fun during his birthday than he was. He was too focused on you to really care anyway. You took up the room, demanding his attention and he happily gave it to you without hesitation or protest.

You took another shot, your vision of the world already spinning but you were having too much fun to really notice, and shivered once more. The effects of the alcohol weren't enough to take the bitter taste away just yet.

A smile pulled at the corner of Simon’s lips and he scoffed, getting your attention as you sent him a look through watery eyes.

“Lightweight.” He teased as he took another sip, completely unbothered.

“Shut up, you’re not even drunk.” You slurred and set the shot glass down on the coffee table. “You’re like a mountain.”

“I’m drunk.”

You gave him a suspicious look, one that was over exaggerated due to how drunk you were but it made him smile more nonetheless. 

That should’ve been enough for you to know that he was drunk, since he didn’t give out big cheesy smiles like you did. His cheeks were dusted pink and his tired eyes hungry just a little bit heavier, a haze over them as he stared at you with a dopey look as if he couldn’t quite understand what you were saying but he hung onto every word. He looked content, there wasn’t an ounce of stress left even in his usual tense shoulders as his body subconsciously leaned towards yours, almost as if he was hovering over you.

You were sure you looked just as drunk as he did, if not more, and yet he looked at you with bright eyes that bounced around your face often.

“You are!” You laughed and he attempted to hide the smile behind his hand. “Can’t hold your liquor that good.”

“Better than you.” He took another sip and you playfully cussed him out.

You ran a hand over your face and glanced around the room, noting that it had gotten dark outside. Your eyebrows knitted together and you wondered how long it had been since you both sat down after dinner to watch movies, thinking that only an hour or two had passed until you checked the time on your phone.

“Shit! We haven’t done cake yet.” You exclaimed when you saw that it was close to midnight.

“So?” Simon raised an eyebrow as you shot up from your spot on the couch.

“You have to have cake on your birthday.”

You tried your best to not stumble into the kitchen, failing at doing so but thankfully you didn’t fall flat on your face. You were extra careful when getting the cake out of the fridge despite the fact that you were in a rush, making sure that when you placed it on the counter to put the candles on, nothing was in the way. 

It was a small cake since you knew that Simon probably would only eat a few slices from it over the week before he was over the sweetness. On top of the icing, almost perfectly written since you were adamant to make it look pretty even though you knew he wouldn’t care, were the words “Happy Birthday Simon”. You placed a few candles around the words, making sure they wouldn’t touch the letters before you carried it into the living room.

You were focused on keeping the cake balanced, not noticing the way Simon’s eyes had softened greatly when you walked into the room and set it in front of him.

“I need your lighter.” You opened your palm urgently.

“You’re gonna burn yourself.” Simon protested with a serious look on his face but you waved him off.

“I won’t! Hurry before it turns midnight.”

Simon hesitantly dug his lighter out of his pocket and handed it to you, watching you intently as you lit the candles, making sure that if you burned yourself he would quickly get you to a sink. However you handed him back the lighter without harming yourself and positioned the cake in front of him properly.

You sat down beside him, your knees touching as you looked between him and the cake. A giddy feeling sprung up in your stomach and you wiggled in your spot excitedly watching Simon’s reaction carefully with clasped hands.

He stared down at the cake with soft eyes, the light from the small flames reflecting in them. They weren’t sad, but you noticed that there was a hint of something more melancholic hidden within his eyes that wasn’t there before until he read the writing. He pulled his hands into his lap almost as if he wasn’t sure what he should do before he hesitantly glanced your way.

You gave him a warm smile, one that signified that whatever he was thinking or feeling was okay, hoping that you didn’t go too far.

“Happy birthday, Simon.” You said softly and scooted close enough that now your thighs were touching.

Simon didn’t say anything but he continued to stare at you, eyes a range of emotion as they bounced around your face, stopping for a moment to look at your lips, until you gestured towards the cake.

“Make a wish.”

He rolled his eyes, a soft huff of amusement leaving his nose before he turned towards the cake and blew out the candles. A small smile pulled at his lips when you cheered and he watched as you stood up from the couch a lot more gracefully this time.

“Want a piece or do I have to eat this all on my own?” You teased and he nodded.

“Not a big one.”

You got plates and quickly cut a small piece out for him and for you. You waited for him to take a bite of it first, almost holding your breath as if this was the very moment that would break your entire ego about your baking skills.

Simon took a small bite of the cake and his eyes shut immediately.

“Fucking hell…” He muttered and your stomach sunk.

“What? Is it bad?” You asked him urgently as you gripped your plate so tight your fingers went sore.

“It’s good, really fucking good what did you put in this?”

Your eyes widened slightly and you felt your chest warm as you watched him eat the piece on his plate faster. You were sure if it was the alcohol making him like the sweetness but as soon as he finished the piece he had he went for another one. 

You smiled to yourself, taking a bit out of the cake on your plate. You hummed at the amazing flavors and felt proud of yourself as you eyed Simon.

“My undying desire to celebrate your birthday.”

“Piss off.”

You laughed, leaning into him enough to where you could hear him chuckle under his breath. The giddy feeling inside of you grew and you didn’t dare ignore it as you found yourself enjoying the closeness that you so rarely got with Simon, pushing yourself into his arm just a little more as you finished your piece of the cake.

Your chest warmed more when he leaned against you as if he liked the contact as well and your head fell to his shoulder, a content sigh leaving your chest as you reveled in his warmth. You noticed that he seemed to have gotten hot due to the alcohol and rolled up the sleeves of his shirt, causing your eyes to jump down to the tattoo on his arm.

It was rare that you saw it since he often wore long sleeves and when he didn’t you never got a good look at it. You assumed that he didn’t want you to see it since every time you asked or he noticed you were staring at it, he would cover it up. Now, with the way you were sitting against him, he couldn’t see that you were staring at the ink unless he turned to look at you.

His tattoo was a lot more intricate than you had first thought, especially now as your eyes traced over the details in the ink designs. You knew he had a thing for skulls, since the mask he wore around you was the lower jaw of one, so it didn’t surprise you when you saw the skulls littered within the other designs. What did come as a surprise to you was that most of the tattoo was war imagery.

Guns, dog tags, a tank, and a literal military soldier etched into his skin made it less a coincidence and more a deliberate design. It made your eyebrows knit together and you fought the urge to grab his arm to look closer.

Was he military? The more you thought about it, the more it started to make sense with the evidence that you had. Going away for months, the guns, the paranoia and depressive episodes, the wounds, all of it paired with his tattoo made it seem obvious and yet there was one issue.

If he was military, then why didn’t he tell you?

It made you curious and yet wary of the answer. Truly, you didn’t want to know, not when he was so adamant to keep it from you, as if knowing would be something that you would regret. 

Besides, someone in his family could be military and despite your reservations about them from your limited knowledge, you weren’t going to be upset if he got a tattoo for them in their memory.

Simon seemed to have noticed that you were staring at it and he placed his large hand over it, covering it from your view and snapping you out of your daze. He looked down at you, his eyes the same as always except you could see that serious look in them, the one demanded you to not ask questions.

“You still have that gift for me or do I need to do somethin’ else for it?” He wondered and you smiled.

“Wait here.” You handed him your plate before you got up and rushed to your room.

You grabbed the joke book from under your bed and made sure that the wrapping was intact. You went to walk out of your room but hesitated a pit growing in your stomach as you stared down at the silly birthday wrapping paper.

Were you really about to give a guy who might be military a joke book? Suddenly you felt foolish, as if you had been caught doing something that you shouldn’t have and you debated on whether you should pretend it got damaged to get something different. It would save you the embarrassment of giving him a stupid book but it would probably disappoint him in the process. 

You could unwrap it and give him the card instead, but that would nearly be almost more of a let down than the actual gift.

A huff left you and tapped your fingers against the wrapping paper.

You should’ve just gotten him a generic gift that most men get, like a bottle opener or a pocket knife. At least that way he wouldn’t have been too disappointed.

“Still there?” Simon called out and your heart jumped to your throat.

“Yeah, couldn't find it for a sec.” You lied and took a deep breath before you stepped out of your room. 

If you got this over with then at least you could get him a different one later. You could always tell him it was a gag gift in an attempt to save yourself too much embarrassment but you felt that somehow Simon would see right through your lie.

You walked into the living room, holding the book close to you as if it were something precious and sat down further away from him this time, noticing that he always had pulled his sleeves down. You glanced up at him to see that he had the excited look in his eyes like he had earlier in the morning which made you even more nervous.

“You didn’t tell me what you wanted so if it’s bad, I’m sorry.” You prefaced and watched as he raised an eyebrow.

“You’re overthinking this.” He tried to assure you with his usual deadpan tone.

“Maybe…just don’t laugh if it’s that bad.”

“I won’t.”

You hesitantly outstretched the gift for him and watched as he gently took it from your hands. You chewed on your lip as you watched him inspect the wrapping on it before he began to tear it off, causing you to grip the couch underneath you. You were practically burning holes into his face when he finally took all of the wrapping off and looked at the cover of the book.

Simon's eyes lit up and it helped calm some of your nerves. 

“I wasn’t sure what you were allowed to have when you’re gone but I got it travel sized.” You explained and he glanced at you with a twinkle in his eyes.

“You like my jokes that much?” He seemed amused by the idea and when you nodded, he huffed a laugh.

“There’s a card in the front.”

Simon pulled the card out, a simple card with a dinosaur on the front that had “ur old” written on the front, and sent you a quick glare that made you snicker. He opened the card and raised an eyebrow at the twenty pounds that fell onto his lap.

“Nobody likes cards without money.” You shrugged and he picked up the note to inspect it. “Use it to get cigarettes or something pretty.”

“Something pretty.” He repeated with amusement. “Think a I need a pop of color?”

“It’d do you good I think.”

He grunted and looked at the card, his face falling when his eyes landed on the polaroid that was taped on the inside and the writing that was scrawled onto the blank space of the card. His sudden change in his expression made you fidget with your fingers as you remembered the photo.

It was a rare photo of you and Simon together, one that you pretty much had to force him to take with you since he seemed to be allergic to any kind of camera. You promised him that it was just for you since you wanted to at least document that you were friends with him somehow. You ended up making two copies and thought it was fitting for him to have one since he was your friend after all.

“I forgot I put that in there…” You mumbled but trailed off as you realized he most likely wasn’t listening.

Simon read the words on the card over and over again, his eyes jumping from them to the polaroid as if he couldn’t understand what he was seeing. His shoulders had tensed up and his free hand clutched the banknote so tight that it crumpled in his grasp. 

By now you were worried that you had either overstepped or completely failed with the gift giving. You were disheartened, your throat tightening up just a bit as you tried to come up with something to say to alleviate the situation.

“You can ignore what’s on the card, I wrote it when you were gone.” Your eyes were glued to his face to see his reaction.

Simon’s eyes darted to you and you shrunk underneath his intense gaze. He was breathing ever so slightly harder, enough for you to notice, and his eyes hazy yet there was something deep hidden within them, something that made a shiver go down your spine. His gaze was too much but you still couldn’t look away as much as you wanted to, as if looking away from him would cause more trouble.

He haphazardly put the card down and before you could react, took your face into his hands and kissed you on the corner of the mouth.

You froze. Your eyes were wide and your heart was in your ears as your mind raced a million times a minute, trying to figure out if what just happened was real and if he truly meant to kiss you there. All the while Simon stared at you with similar shock, almost as if he didn’t mean for it to happen at all.

Was he going for your cheek and missed? Was he going for your lips and missed? Did he actually just kiss you or was it a really drunk hug?

You were panicking, your already shot nerves mixing with the alcohol created a strange feeling in your stomach that urged you to attempt to kiss him back. 

However, much to your dismay, he quickly pulled away from you before you could even have your lips connected. Heat immediately washed over you and you nearly ran out of the room as you scooted away from him, completely unable to look him in the eyes now as you felt the need to sink into the couch and never appear again.

You misread the situation, the alcohol had gotten you, the horrible, stupid liquid turned your brain to mush and made you too impulsive. You wanted to die, you wanted to do anything to get rid of the embarrassment you felt that you went to leave before Simon grabbed onto your wrist.

“Don’t.” He pulled you back down and kept hold of your wrist. “Look at me.”

You couldn’t make yourself look at him even if you wanted to. The thought of having to stare at his intense eye right now made you feel sick to your stomach. You just wanted to hide in your room until both of you decided that this never happened and that your friendship wasn’t ruined by a misunderstanding. 

“Please.” 

One word, soft and desperate, had you turning your entire body towards him immediately. You hesitated for a moment before you looked into his eyes, the comforting brown dowsing some of your nerves as he drank up your face, the intensity still there but held back by the fact that his face was red and he eyes broke from yours multiple times.

He looked just as embarrassed as you felt.

You were about to apologize when he cut you off.

“Not like this.” He swallowed hard and stared deep into your eyes hoping that you would understand what he meant without him having to say it out loud.

It took you a moment to realize and most of the embarrassment fading as his eyes darted away from yours. You stared down at his hand around your wrist, his hot skin against yours prickle with goosebumps before you eyes widened. If he doesn’t want to kiss you now that means he wants to kiss you later which means he’s thought about kissing you.

You felt dizzy at the thought and you could hardly think straight as it was. You couldn’t think about the implications of the words he said right now, not when you were stumbling drunk and close to a heart attack due to this very awkward situation that he admittedly put you both in. 

“Oh.”

That’s all you could think to say. A meek ‘oh’ as if that was enough to convey the feelings and thoughts raging inside of you that would surely clear the air if you said them yet you couldn’t find the words to do so. But right now maybe that wasn’t what you both needed.

No, right now you needed to ease the situation so you could think about this later with a clear mind and without screwing it up more.

“Tell me a joke.” You said, your voice still small, and he looked at you with confusion. “Tell me a joke, Simon.”

Simon let go of your wrist and turned away from you. He gave you one last glance before he picked up the joke book and flipped through the pages, taking his time to read through the lines which filled the room with awkward silence that mixed with the random movie on the TV. 

He took a deep breath and cleared his throat.

“What do you call a prisoner going down the stairs?” He asked and you knitted your eyebrow with confusion. He didn’t look up from the book when you didn’t answer but he nodded. “Condescending.”

“Oh man.” You scoffed, cringing at the horrible joke but finding it hard to not laugh all the same.

You fought against a smile that threatened to appear on your face and you made eye contact with Simon as he glanced at you. You watched as his shoulder relaxed slightly and he looked back down at the book in his hands, eyes skimming the words like mad.

“A book fell on my head today. I’ve only got my shelf to blame.”

“Ugh! Horrible.”

You couldn’t hold back your laughter now or the smile as the alcohol made it so much easier for the jokes to make you happy. You scooted closer to him and he turned his body towards you, his eyes still looking at you hesitantly, almost as if he was asking you permission to keep going or to even look at you, but he couldn’t help but smile as well. 

“What kind of murderer has fiber?” He asked and you shook your head. 

“I’m going to regret this aren’t I?” You waited for him to continue as you prematurely cringed from the bad joke that was about to grace your ears.

“A cereal killer.”

You made a disgusted sound but laughed and rested your forehead against his shoulder. You expected him to nudge you off but he didn’t and instead you heard him let out a quick sigh of relief before he flipped through the book again.

Simon rattled off a few more jokes, each of them making you laugh and taking the tension out of the air until both of you were settled against each other on the couch as if nothing had happened. He pressed his shoulder against yours as he closed the book and stared up at the ceiling. 

The movie took up the silence as you both sat there for a moment.

You looked up at him and he looked down at you when he saw you move from the corner of his eye. You took in his scars again and the way that they seemed more prominent from his red cheeks, looking into his eyes to see that they still had the tired look in them before you spoke.

“How drunk are you?” You wondered and he blinked.

“Not drunk enough to forget this.” He admitted, knowing exactly the reason why you asked him.

You nodded, knowing that you were the same. Even if you were more drunk than you were right now sure that you would remember something like this and yet the thought didn’t scare you. As embarrassing as it was, you didn’t want to forget it.

“Good.”

Link to Part 3

A/N: This feels messy but honestly I can't go back and restart so I hope it's okay. Also Idk how the UK money system works so just imagine what I put is correct and not wrong lol

EDIT: I forgot to put the tags sorry!! @msecho19

[bryngmemoney]

✁FASHION FLIRT✃

Megumi Fushiguro x Reader

⭑story masterlist link

tw: none

Writing in between messages!!

🪡Chapter Nineteen: First Date

Megumi led the way as you walked by his side to a restaurant he had recommended, which was apparently also his favorite.

“I think you’ll like it, well I hope you like it.” he smiled at you as you two continued your walk. “I bet I will, sounds good from what you’ve described.”

He looked down at your hand, wondering if he should reach for it, at least to try and be a little more romantic. Megumi had been alone with you before, last night he was feeling especially brave, so why couldn’t he do that now. He felt nervous, more than he had been any other time with you. It might’ve been the fact that this was officially a date.

He was a little thankful when he finally saw the street sign of the place a few feet away from you. Maybe once you guys had settled down to eat he’d know what to do.

There ended up being a couple people waiting in front of you, so you guys ended up waiting to be seated for a bit. “You really like this place?” you asked him. “Yeah, it’s pretty good i’d say.” You took a moment to look around the place as you waited, it definitely went in line with the atmosphere you’d think he’d enjoy.

You turned to look at him about to bring up the whole fiasco in the morning, only to stop when you saw he had his camera app open, ‘discreetly’ trying to look at himself. You saw him try to adjust a few strands of his hair that fell on his face, his eyes scrunching slightly with worry as if he thought he looked off. “I like your hair.” you complimented, catching him completely off guard. He looked up from his phone, immediately trying to hide the screen as if you hadn’t already been looking at him.

“Oh, uh, it’s nothing special.” He had to look away before you noticed how red his face was getting.

“Megumi,” you laughed, watching his back completely face you.

“Shut up, don’t laugh at me, I take you out for lunch and this is the thanks I get?” He peeked back over, still slightly flustered but in a better condition to at least look at you.

“You’re cute, and pretty, it’s why I chose you to be my model.”

“Shut up, you don’t know what you’re saying.”

Just then the hostess called out his name, signaling the table was ready for you two. “C’mon,” he spoke, finally deciding to just grab your hand, as you both walked to be seated.

Excited to finally just sit down with you and talk, especially after working up more confidence, he was about to let go of your hand so you could take a seat across from him in the booth you’d been assigned. Yet the moment he heard an all too familiar voice call his name he cursed the universe for ruining his one chance. He debated running off with you knowing exactly who was approaching.

“Megumi kid, is that you?” You turned to look behind you, only to be met with your teacher, Satoru Gojo.

“Megumi! It is! And Y/n? What is going on here?” He had a more teasing, playful tone, yet you were a bit put off by the whole thing.

“Go away, please.” Megumi said, you felt him slightly tighten his hold around your hand.

“Oh but we haven’t caught up in so long! I basically raised you and now you shew me away? Why don’t we have lunch together, me and Geto were just about to be sat down, but we can just join you two! Don’t worry i’ll pay.” Before Megumi could protest again, he was already sat on one side, turning around to wave Geto over once they saw each other.

“I’m so so sorry,” you heard Megumi mumble to you as he sat down defeatedly opposite of Gojo, leaving room for you.

Author’s Note: megumi’s so done

anyways next date will hopefully be uninterrupted 🤗

hope you guys enjoyed!

Taglist below, feel free to comment or dm me to be added!!

TAGLIST

@iridescentrays @gumimegz @maya-maya-56 @mamafly @lunavixia @swissy23 @coltsgf @m00nglad3-mp3 @etsukis @xosren @qtnfer @oengleli @harek89 @y-sabell-a @morgyyyyyyy @getolvr @liliumaraneae @k3lbade @aiieera @dancedancey @get0sfav @chuyasthighs0 @hyssoplampflickers @kpopanimen @sad-darksoul @vivi-loves-penguins @kasumitenbaz @talkingsperm @nymphsdomain @inlovewithlondonn @rzcnlb @enchantingkitty @fuyuzemi @lysaray @ni-ki-ismyluv @renemy @frumira @mixzimi @miralunaela @dreamxiing @p3achiee @anianurst @nishii28 @arguendo @sleepytoges @hallothankmas

[grimoireofhayley]

Of Friends and Horror

Stu Macher x Fem!Reader x Billy Loomis

WARNINGS: Graphic content, Smut (MINORS DNI), Language, Talks of SA, Cheating, Obsessiveness, Gore, 18+ Content, Stalking, Possessiveness, Dirty talk, Religion talk, Suppressed Mental Health problems (I.e., reader has some issues that she isn’t aware of)

Word Count: 1.2k

Tag List: @ev3ningrain @nerdytif @fanfic-enjoyer123 @darkenwolfie

A/N: I hope you all are enjoying this series so far, it’s going to be a long one! Let me know in the comments what you think about it thus far, what your favourite chapter is, or even part of a chapter. It makes my day reading your guys’ comments (: and it motivates me more to do more chapters! Also, I’m almost at 100 followers and I couldn’t be any more grateful 🥹 I’m thinking that once I hit the 100 mark, I’ll write a short story for said 100th follower of their choice! Or you guys can request any character for me to write about and a prompt on my page, it’ll make it a lot easier lol. Thank you ☺️ I hope you like this chapter!

All chapter links! 👇🏻👇🏻👇🏻

OF&H Masterlist

Chapter 6

The atmosphere was quickly illuminated by red, white and blue hues as the now-new crime scene unfolded in front and inside of your house.

“Jesus, (Y/n), what happened?” Tatum sprinted to your side, maneuvering under the caution tape and into your living room.

You sighed, rubbing your temples in slow-soothing circles, stress appearing in dark patches under your eyes.

“He was here…” You whispered, traumatized as the image of Steve’s heart flickered in your memories.

“Tatum, you shouldn’t be here. This is official police business, now.” Dewey scolded his younger sister, walking up beside her.

“Ugh, as if…” She rolled her eyes, “She’s staying with Sidney and I tonight. I was coming to pick her up…”

“That was still happening… even after the fight Sidney and I had?” You looked up at Tatum, momentarily forgetting about all the fuss that was going on around you.

“Yep, it’s a good thing too.” Tatum chuckled, sitting next to you. “I don’t care what happened between you and Sid earlier, you were my friend first and I’ll be damned if I let a bitch-fit between the two of you get in the way.” She nudged your shoulder, playfully. You smiled, but it quickly faded, hearing the staticky-voice over Dewey’s walkie-talkie.

“Dewey, you might want to come see this.” Sheriff Burke spoke, concern coaxing his words.

Your stomach twisted in all sorts of directions, squeezing tightly at the acid that was forming in it, causing it to travel up to your esophagus. You were ready to vomit, but you swallowed it, fighting the feeling, not wanting to go anywhere by yourself.

You wondered what Sheriff Burke meant.

“Right away, Sir.” Dewey spoke into his device, walking into the direction of where his boss was.

“So, what exactly happened, ( N/n)?”

“I got a phone call, then it quickly escalated from there…” You placed your hands over your face, futilely attempting to suffocate yourself with the pressure. “I thought nothing of it at first, but I-I was already getting the heebie-jeebies from the call, but he sounded genuine, so I ignored the feeling and kept talking to him…” You brought your hands to your lap, looking at Tatum, “Then the ph-phone went silent and at that exact moment, my doorbell r-rang…” You stumbled your sentence, struggling to find the proper words to continue explaining. “I was hesitant, so I peeped through the eyehole, trying to see if anyone was lurking about, but there was no one.” You sighed, “I decided I’d open the door, and you know, maybe get a better look, again, there was no one.” A tear rolled down your cheek.

“Hey, hey, it’s okay, take it easy..” Tatum tried to comfort you and brought you into a hug, you were quick to wrap your arms around her, squeezing her, as you whimpered.

“Th-There was this box, and I didn’t think twice before I brought it into my home… oh, god.” You sobbed, “His heart was in it, Tatum, his fuckin’ heart!” Your voice broke.

“Hold on, whose heart?” She asked, baffled by what she was hearing.

“Steve’s.” You let out a quiet mewl, hugging Tatum tighter.

“How do you know?”

“Because he said it in the note and I-I believe it.” You sobbed yet again, “That’s not e-even the worst part…”

As bad as that may sound, it was true, the heart in the box wasn’t your main concern, but the fact that he was watching you, that he admitted it over the note that he had sloppily written, that he stated it over the phone; he was there, he could have been in your house the entire time, waiting for a moment to strike.

You could have been his next victim, the next book Gale Weathers would’ve written about. However, what’s even more concerning is that you thought it was sweet that he’d given you one of your biggest heartbreaks in a box. Pun intended.

The killer gave you Steve Orth’s heart; the guy that gave you both hell and pure bliss behind closed doors. The guy who seen you at your most vulnerable, the one who continued to defile you even when he was in a relationship.

You had his heart, officially. That’s all you ever wanted, but that was months ago.

This was karma doing what she did best, revenge…

Did the killer know about the affair? The humiliation? Did he kill Steve just for you? No, he couldn’t have, but did he? Was he someone you knew? Probably not, but he could be. You’ll never know and it’s eating you up inside. Why make a grand gesture and not show who he is, or even give you a subtle hint of who it may be.

As much as it scared you, it also humbled you. It was romantic, but completely unnecessary, yet, you wanted to thank him. Thank the stranger; the killer, for doing God’s dirty work, or in this case, Karma’s.

What is wrong with you? For fuck’s sake, he killed two people, and probably will kill again. Why would you want to thank him for that, are you that depraved? Maybe.

“Earth to (Y/n)?” Tatum snapped her fingers in front of your face, startling you from the never ending thoughts that corroded your mind.

“S-Sorry, what?” You stuttered, wiping a single tear from your cheek.

“I thought I lost you there for a moment, Hun. Dewey wants to speak with you…” She smiled, lightly, nodding towards her brother who appeared out of nowhere.

“Okay.. yeah, y-yeah, for sure..” Your voice was barely above a whisper.

You pushed yourself off the couch, making your way to the kitchen with Dewey.

“We’re sending the heart and the box away for DNA testing to see if it actually is Steve’s heart, alright?” Dewey explained, “We also want to take the note…” He stopped, turning around, picking up some other object, “And this to see if the suspect had left any fingerprints.” He showed it to you, and you paled, but the colour soon came back to your face as you felt yourself blush.

You were met with a paper-white face with two hollowed eyes and a gaping mouth, it was a mask, a mask that looked utterly horrifying, yet, disturbingly attractive at the same time.

Was it wrong that you were starting to get wet from the sheer thought of a possible tall and muscular man killing for you, wearing this mask?

Probably, but you didn’t care.

You squeezed your thighs together, putting pressure on your heat, trying to not let it slide that the mask was getting you off.

“We found this outside in the bushes by your house.” Dewey said, “Have you seen it before?”

You shook your head, biting your lip, you’ve never seen that before in your life, you’d be sure to remember it if you did. Though, now that you did see it, it wasn’t going to leave your mind, especially with how it was making you feel.

‘It almost looks like a Ghost Fac—‘ You cut yourself off mid thought.

“G.F…” You mumbled at no one in particular, “That’s what it stands for, Ghost Face, the killer dubbed himself as Ghost Face…”

<- Previous Next ->

[lincolndjarin]

Best Kept Secret

chapter eighteen : portrait of a man (RE-UPLOAD)

ao3 link ✿ series masterlist ✩ main masterlist ✧

pairing : bodyguard!Din Djarin x afab!princess!reader

rating : 18+ mdni

word count : 5.4k

summary : the mandalorian and reader do some reading

warnings, etc. : language, mentions of sex

A/N : i had to change accounts so this is a re-upload of my ongoing fic bks!!

It’s deliciously warm when you wake. You can feel his heartbeat and you can feel the soft traces of sunlight dancing along your back. You stretch in his arms slightly but freeze up as you feel him nuzzle his chin into your hair, planting a kiss against your hairline. 

His helmet is still off.

And the room is completely illuminated by the sunrise. 

He seems to sense your hesitancy and after some adjustment his face is concealed once more as you gaze up at him.

“Sorry sarad, I must have fallen asleep without it on.” His voice is gravelly and thick with sleep as he looks down at you. He’s acting like it wouldn’t be the end of the world if you accidentally saw.

 It might very well be.

You know his creed is precious to him, even if he says he is an apostate. You don’t want him to break it just for you and end up regretting it later.

“I don’t want to see until I’m allowed to.” That doesn’t really make sense and you know it. “Will I ever be allowed to? How does that work?” He sits up as you speak, stretching his arms above his head.

“I’ll explain it another time, right now I need to get you back to your room before someone realizes you're gone.” He’s crawled to the edge of the bed and he’s already pulling his boots on.

Oh yeah. 

It was easy to fall into a fantasy of staying here with him. For a moment there you had completely forgotten that you were married, and expected in other places. You stand looking for your dress as he attaches his armor. 

“Don’t change yet, it’ll be easier to sneak you back in if you aren’t wearing a shimmery gown.” He’s so quick with it, in the time it takes you to even find your gown he’s completely done getting ready. “Do you have everything?” He turns to face you as he takes the dress from you and throws it over his arm. 

Your eyes dart to the shelf. 

Your knife is up there. 

He chuckles when he catches your line of sight.

“Not gonna happen, princess. Let’s go.” He takes your hand and hastily drags you out of the cabin. In the morning light you can see what he had been carrying you over last night.

The cabin was built partially on top of the lake. It must be a pain having to carefully step over all of the water but he doesn’t seem to mind as he scoops you into his arms and looks to be contemplating something.

“Is your bedroom window unlocked?”

That’s an odd question. But you know it is, you’re several floors up so you never lock it.

“Yes, why?” 

“No reason.” You can hear a grin on his face. 

He starts walking, not really caring if he steps into the water as he carries you towards the castle. Once you're through the gardens and past the forest trail he adjusts his cowl to cover your face. You rest your head against his chest as he makes his way towards what you assume to be the servant's entrance. But you never hear a door open, instead he leans down to whisper to you.

“Keep your eyes closed.”

Is he about to take off his helmet in broad daylight?

You don’t get a chance to question it as you shut your eyes and you feel the cowl ripped from your face, there’s an unfamiliar rush of air against your skin and the sound of a click and a creak. 

“You can open them now.” He whispers again, you aren’t sure what you expect to see when you open your eyes but it certainly isn’t him standing on the outside of your window sill, balancing you in his arms.

You know immediately that it’s a mistake as you look down and find yourself several stories off the ground. 

“Maker! What is wrong with you!” You cling to him tighter but he simply laughs as he peels you off of him to set you inside. 

“Sorry, hand me your clothes.” There’s a sudden urgency in his voice that keeps you from arguing, you strip to your undergarments and toss him the things you borrowed, he doesn’t hesitate to throw your dress onto the floor. “I’ll see you in a few minutes.” You’re left staring dumbfounded as he jumps off the ledge at the same moment your door swings open and Elaine’s voice fills the room.

“I’m telling you, we don’t have to knock, she isn’t here, we’ll just wait for h-“ She stops and stares at you with wide eyes and your face gets hot at the implications of her words. 

“Good morning girls.” You stammer out as they both look surprised to see you.

“Apologies for not knocking my lady.” Elaine bows as she says it, cocking an eyebrow in your direction but you don’t give her a reaction as you simply walk to the mirror to be prepped. 

They seem relieved that you don’t have anything to say and you’re relieved that Elaine doesn’t press further as they begin to dress you. The gown Lysa chooses for today is a soft gray color, the fabric shimmers in the light and it sort of reminds you of the Mandalorian’s armor. 

Nobody seems to have anything to say to each other this morning but you truly don’t mind. In a few minutes you’ll get to see him again. 

And things are okay now. 

Right?

You’ve established a mutual want. 

But what does that mean?

Shit.

You hadn’t really talked about that. But that shouldn’t matter, he had practically confessed his love, he had given you his name. 

You need to talk about it.

But he never wants to talk about it.

This time has to be different though, things are good.

It has to be different.

You don’t even realize they’ve finished until Elaine clears her throat. 

“Kriff, sorry, thank you girls, you’ve done wonderful work as always.” It’s true. As you look up at yourself in the mirror to take in another amazing job done by them. You can’t even tell that you were being carried through the forest less than an hour ago.

“Thank you, my lady, shoes?” Lysa holds up a pair of flats and you nod, taking a seat at the vanity and hiking your skirt up a bit.

Shit.

You’re still wearing his socks. 

In your rush you must have forgotten about them. 

She stares for only a moment, her eyes darting up to your face before she removes them, slipping on your flats. You can tell by the way her eyebrows raise ever so slightly that she sees the dirt on the soles of your feet from your barefoot walk in the gardens last night, but thankfully she says nothing. After a beat of silence you cough awkwardly. 

“Thank you girls, that will be all.” They nod as they both take their leave. You give them time to make their way down the hall before you grab your journal and some pens, as you throw the door open he’s there just like always. He doesn’t look like someone who had flown you up to your window this morning, he looks exactly the same as always. There’s no sense in concealing the smile on your face as you stare at him.

“Library?” You ask as he nods, you begin your trek and he still stands behind you but closer than ever before, just a step or two back. “Can we talk today?”

“Of course, princess.” A wave of relief washes over you as he says it. This might be the first time he’s ever had a positive reaction to that question. You walk in a happy silence until you arrive. Today you do not hesitate to sit in the nook, no longer haunted by the memories of what’s transpired there. 

He stands sort of bashfully, looking at you and then at a few chairs nearby. 

This is why you need to talk.

It’s things like this, your relationship is so vaguely defined and in the cold light of day, just Din, doesn’t know where to sit. 

You scootch over a bit and pat the space next to you.

“Sit with me?” You say softly to hopefully ease the anxiety that is apparent in his body language. He relaxes a bit as he takes a seat next to you, you fit like puzzle pieces, like the nook was made for the two of you to sit comfortably.

It’s an added bonus that it’s far enough into the shelves that you’ll hear anyone coming before they see you. 

He leans back against the glass as you open your journal, uncapping a pen and lazily doodling. You can feel his gaze on the pages but you don’t mind.

“What did you want to talk about mesh’la?” He murmurs as he begins to trace his fingers along your back, drawing shapes into the fabric of your dress.

It shocks you a bit.

His blatant affection. 

Nothing could have prepared you for him to act like this in the daylight. 

Of course he had humored you in the markets, and when you had been “together” he had always been kind but now his voice had a certain devotion to it, and he touched you like he needed to do it to stay grounded. 

He almost seems… clingy.

It makes your heart flutter. 

“I guess I just wanted to talk about this,” You gesture at him with the pen. “us.” 

He hums softly in agreement. 

“Okay, what about us?” He tugs gently at one of the ribbons on your corset, not hard enough to pull it loose, just hard enough to grab your attention. You shoot a glare at him, there’s no actual fire behind it.

“I thought you said you’d be good?”

“And you said I could touch you a little.” As he says it you roll your eyes before turning back to your drawings. You’ve been sketching the same curved line. The hook of his nose you had felt last night. If he recognizes it he doesn’t say anything. 

“Fine. What exactly are we?” He resumes his tracing as you say it, it feels like a juvenile question, it’s what you would always ask your boyfriends back on Hoth after a few weeks of screwing around, but he doesn’t seem bothered by it.

“What was it you called me in the gardens? Your lover? I could be that if that’s what you’d like me to be.” His fingers have moved to your shoulders now, the shapes on your pages have turned into rough outlines of what you remember his jaw is shaped like.

Lover feels too impersonal.

This is more than that. 

He certainly isn’t your boyfriend, can you even have a boyfriend? Afterall you already have a husband. 

Would Din want to be your husband someday?

Could Din be your husband someday? Kodo certainly wouldn’t just let you leave, the trade deals your family so desperately needed would be useless if you did. Is it too soon to be thinking such a thing? You have only just truly become emotionally involved but also you’ve spent every waking moment with him for several weeks at this point. And you’ve had sex. 

Maker, why does this have to be so confusing?

“Is there maybe a Mando’a word for what we are?” You turn to look at him again.

He starts to say something but then he stops, seemingly changing his mind.

“How about kar’ta?” 

“Kar’ta? What’s that mean?” You like the way the word feels in your mouth. His knuckles are dragging against your arm now. 

“It means heart. You would be my heart and I would be yours.” His voice is warm and it feels like you’re sinking into his touches. 

His heart. 

You like that.

“My Kar’ta.” You say, looking down at your drawings, you have several mixed and matched faces, none of which seem to look right, you hold them up for him to see. “Do any of these look correct?” 

He points to the one of the bottom left, the eyes are lopsided. 

“That ones the closest, other than the eyes, none of the eyes are right.” You sigh, you already knew he would say that.

“They never are.” You flip the page and start drawing pairs of eyes. You’re silent for a few minutes, he continues tracing shapes into your back and you continue drawing, you eventually realize he’s mimicking your sketches. 

You know what you want to tell him. It’s a strange pivot in conversation but you need him to know. 

Your next words force themselves from your mouth. “I don’t love Kodo, I don’t even like him.” His movements stop, only for a second before continuing. 

“I would hope not, I don’t know if you noticed but he’s a bit of a monster.” 

“I know, I just wanted to say it. I just- I mean, I don’t think of myself as married to him, it’s more a title than anything else.” You hesitate for a moment. “And we don’t have sex. In case you were wondering.” You haven’t thought about that fact in a while.

Someday Kodo will want heirs. 

It makes you shudder a bit.

Maybe Din will get you out of here before that happens. 

He senses the tension you’re suddenly plagued with and he switches to just rubbing gentle circles against your back. 

“Okay.” He speaks so quietly now. 

“I don’t ever want to have sex with him.” You whisper, mostly to yourself. 

It had always been an inevitable thing. A duty you had to fulfill. But that was before you knew who he was. Before you knew you had married a monster. And that was before Din, before your kar’ta. 

“You don’t have to. I promise.”His voice is soothing but it does nothing to put you at ease.

It’s a promise he can’t keep.

But you don’t want to linger on this any longer so you nod, much to your chagrin he senses your hesitancy as he sits up. 

“Hey, I mean it. If he so much as touches you again, I swear it will be the last time.” 

“You can’t guarantee that Din.” He’s taking your sketchbook from you, setting it aside before holding your hands in his. 

“He isn’t going to touch you. Ever again. I never should have let him in the first place.” His grip on your hand tightens ever so slightly as he recalls the memory, you can’t help but frown.

“I’m glad you let him, you wouldn’t be here right now if you hadn’t.” 

That makes him go quiet. 

You both know you’re right, if he had laid a finger on Kodo he would at the very least have been fired. Worst case scenario he’d be dead.

“He won’t touch you again.” He sounds firmer this time. “I’m sworn to you. No one gets to touch you unless you want them to, not even me.” 

You want to believe that he could stop Kodo. That he could stop all six of his battle droids. It’ll be easier if you just let yourself believe it. 

So for now you do. 

You drop his hands and rest your head on his shoulder. 

“Okay.” You mumble. 

“Okay.” He tilts his helmet slightly to rest against your head.

You reach around to grab your book back. Opening to the page with the eyes. 

“Which ones are right?” You point around the page. He analyzes them for a bit before taking the pen again, scribbling until he’s drawn messy but identifiable eyes. 

“Like this.”

His drawing is crude but the eyes are nice. You carefully tear the outline of them out before placing them over the other drawing he had pointed out. 

It almost looks right. 

It almost suits the person you know. 

He lets you stay leaning on his shoulder so you don’t bother moving as you flip to an empty page. You think for a few moments on what to draw. 

The tiny toothbrush. 

You think of the sketch of mismatched parts you now have of him and what you’ve been able to feel out and you subconsciously start drawing a child. 

You give him Din’s nose, and dark curls. You don’t bother trying to copy his eyes, opting to instead give the little boy wide dark eyes. You scribble out several different versions of the child you’ve made up as he watches silently. 

Eventually you stop and just stare at the page full of little faces staring up at you. 

Does this boy exist somewhere out there?

It sort of seems that way, when you look at all the pieces of Din that don’t seem to make sense. The toothbrush, he had mentioned a kid at one point but hadn’t said much about it and now you know that he willingly showed his face to someone. Was it his child? Why did he have to say goodbye to his own child?

Can you imagine Din being a father? When you think of how well he takes care of himself it makes you worry a bit for any child in his care but then you think of how well he takes care of you.

Selflessly. 

He’s probably a good father. That must be where his protective nature comes from. 

His laughter breaks you out of your trance and he points to one of the drawings, the boy in that one has the largest eyes, and the pupils take up nearly the entirety of them.

“You got his eyes right in that one.” He says as he chuckles. 

“What?” You stammer out.

His eyes. 

“I assume you’re trying to figure out who he is? None of these are even close, but those eyes, those are his.” 

Of course he knew what you were doing, nothing got past him. 

You wait for more but that’s all he gives you.

You can wait longer, until he’s ready to talk about it. Based on the way he sighs you think that moment might be right now but he says something else instead.

“I don’t think I’ve apologized yet for what I said. Truly apologize.” You close the journal on your own this time before setting it down. 

He’s talking about what he said.

“I was… bored. You were entertainment.”

He knows you haven’t simply forgotten about it. Afterall, how could you? 

“It doesn’t excuse what I did, but I didn’t mean a word of it.”

You want to believe him terribly, but that nagging feeling in the back of your mind is persistent. A reminder that any moment he could decide to stop being Din, and go back to being nothing more than your shadow. 

“Why did you say it then?” 

You don’t want to have this conversation either. The last thing you want to do is relive those moments but you aren’t an idiot, your insecurities will eventually bubble up, it’s better to take care of this now before it grows into resentment. He’s leaning back again, out of your peripherals. 

“I meant it, when I said that I ache.” Is he sitting like that so you can’t look at him? “None of what I’m about to say is a good enough reason to explain my actions, nothing ever could be. You control my every thought and decision, sarad. I suppose I just thought that it would be best if you hated me, that it would make the pain dull, instead it only served to make me realize that I cannot live without you.”

That’s one hell of a proclamation.

“You wanted me to hate you?” As you say it you feel Beskar rest against the back of your shoulder. 

“For a while. It seemed like the least painful option. I deserved- deserve, your loathing. At first for feeling the way I did towards a married woman, a woman I was supposed to be protecting and instead was picturing naked.”

Hot. It’s hot in the library. It hasn’t been hot in the library for some time. 

“And then I saw the two of you together. And I knew immediately that you did not feel an ounce of love for that thing you were forced to wed. At that point I simply needed you to hate me to soothe the ache that signified that you could never be mine.” He sighs, and there’s a moment of hesitation before you hear the hiss of air you’re becoming all too familiar with. You aren’t exactly sure what you expect, it definitely isn’t the feeling of several kisses being peppered along the curve of your shoulder but you certainly aren’t going to complain about it. “I did not know weakness before I met you, you have turned me from a man made of steel to one of glass.” His voice rings clear and unfiltered throughout the room. 

He plants another kiss into your hair, there aren’t any traces of lust behind the action, just a pure adoration, he brushes a bit of your hair out of the way and for a moment you feel the bridge of his nose press against the back of your neck before he places one final, chaste kiss against your spine. When he speaks again his voice is modulated once more.

“I don’t want your forgiveness, I certainly haven’t earned it.” He finally leans forward so he’s back in your field of vision. “But I will. Someday I will be worthy of you, I promise.”

He already is. He always has been.

Will you ever get used to this? His genuine affections? It takes your breath away more than the sex did, the way he talks about you like you are not a woman, but a deity. The way he removes his helmet as if it doesn’t mean anything, just so he can feel you against his lips. 

There’s no sense in telling him that’s all you needed to hear. You know him, he won’t accept that, he’s far too stubborn. So instead you opt to make things more lighthearted.

“How do you plan to make it up to me, my kar’ta?” As you say it you can visibly see some of the stress leave his body, thank the gods. 

“I have plenty of ideas.” The way he says it makes your heart flutter and you nearly forget that he’s promised not to fuck you. “I was thinking I could take you to the library tomorrow.” You’d be lying if you said that didn’t sort of kill your buzz, considering where you’re currently sitting but he senses your reluctance and chuckles. “The big one, in the city, cyar’ika.”

“Oh.” You can’t help but laugh along with him now. “You know, you’re getting better at talking, about the important stuff that is.” You give him a smile.

“It’s easier when you don’t look at me.” He says it a bit abashedly.

“Why is that?”

“Before you I never felt like someone could see my face. Yet everytime you look at me it’s like I’m not wearing a helmet at all, like you’re staring right at me.” He takes your hand and brings your fingers to the bottom of the helmet, tilting his head down slightly so you can feel his lips as he kisses the pads of your fingers before withdrawing them.

Maker.

Yeah, you’re never gonna get used to that. 

Eventually he gets up to find some books, bringing you a mystery romance novel, you wouldn’t normally pick it for yourself but the cover art is interesting enough to draw you in, he appears to have some kind of maintenance guide on ship engines, you have no idea how he reads that kind of thing. As he hands you the books he motions for you to stand, when you do so he sits in the nook horizontally, with his feet up on the cushions, his back leaning against one of the surrounding shelves, motioning for you to sit between his legs. 

You want to protest that it won’t be comfortable for him but your resolve simply isn’t strong enough to resist as you crawl between his thighs, your back resting against his chest as you hand his literature to him. The nook isn’t really built for two people to sit like this, it’s a bit cramped but you couldn’t be more comfortable, you want to make sure he’s okay with this position but he’s already got his book open, held in one outstretched hand so you simply open yours, placing it on your bent knees. 

It’s surprisingly good. You’ve always had a preference for campy, over the top romance books. The sort of books with shirtless men riding horses on the front. The more ridiculous the better. But you’re completely absorbed by the story you find yourself in, gasping every so often at the reveals. 

It’s shocking once you realize you’ve already made it to the last chapter, you had completely forgotten you were lying against Din until you turn and see that he must have finished his book at some point because now he’s reading yours over your shoulder.

“Can we finish this before I take you to get your dinner?” He mumbles, leaning forward slightly.

There is a peace to this situation that you’re sure you’ve never known.

This is the kind of life you could have with him.

You can’t seem to find the words to respond, and the lump in your throat won’t let you make something up so you nod, and you lean your head back against his chest and continue where you left off. 

You like the ending. Much to your surprise the story ended happily, you had even teared up a bit when you realized everything was going to work out for the love interests. You might let him pick books for you more often, as long as he lets you find him something less boring to read. There has to be at least one exciting book about ships in here. 

If there isn’t, you’ll find him one tomorrow when you go to the city library. 

He sits up, which of course means you also sit up. He lets you stand first, your legs are stiff from being in the same position for hours but you find your footing quickly. He seems to be having no issues as he’s putting the books back. 

You’re waiting for him to take your hand so you can fetch dinner, the two of you standing in silence for a moment, when it hits you, you feel like an idiot. 

He isn’t going to take your hand. 

Because you’re leaving the library and someone could see. 

You plaster on a strained smile before leaving, thankfully he says nothing about your hesitation as you begin walking towards the kitchens. 

Leo is of course waiting for you by the entrance. (You’ve come to accept that he’s simply everywhere at this point.) And you do the same thing you always do, he asks what you’d like to eat, you tell him whatever they’ve cooked, he insists you can request anything you’d like, you insist you’d like what they’ve cooked. 

The only difference this time is that you ask for seconds.

He disappears in a huff before swiftly returning with several sealed dishes, as always he hands them to Mando and not you. 

✩

The two of you return to your chambers and when he steps inside you lock the door behind you.

“Sit.” You say it as sternly as possible. Like it’s an order. He sets the food on the floor before sitting with his legs crossed next to it. “You’re gonna eat, this is non-negotiable.” 

He immediately begins to protest but you shush him.

“You don’t need to feed me anymore. I can take care of myself.” He starts trying to stand but you firmly plant your hands on his shoulders and push him back down.

“Clearly not, you didn’t eat once today, I’m sure of it.” You frown down at him.

“Neither did you.”

“That's because I was watching you! And now to make up for it I’m going to eat real food, not ration packs.”

He doesn’t budge, still staring at you blankly.

“Listen… if you do this, I’ll reward you.” You raise your eyebrows suggestively.

You hadn’t really planned to give in so soon but you’re only human, he had gotten you pretty fired up in the library today whether that was his intention or not. 

And you certainly aren’t going to say it, but you miss being with him in that way.

“Are you trying to bribe me with sex?” The disbelief in his voice is apparent, you ignore it, dividing up the food, making sure his portion is considerably larger, they always give you too much food anyway.

“Is it working?” You set the plate in front of him, batting your eyelashes innocently. He coughs nervously, leaning back.

“No. I don’t want sex to be a currency with you, I want you to want it.” His voice is strained and you can’t help but smirk. 

“That’s a shame, because you’re going to eat either way.” You stand, walking so you're behind him, sitting back to back, your plate in your lap. 

“That’s a wild assumption, princess.” His voice is still modulated so you know he hasn’t made any attempts to listen. 

“I thought you were trying to earn my forgiveness?” That shuts him up. He grumbles for a few moments before you hear a hiss and a clunk as he sets his helmet on the floor. “Thank you.”

“Don’t sound so smug, you can only use that reason so many times before I stop giving in.” He mumbles through a mouthful of food, it makes you grin. 

“Speaking of your road to redemption, can I ask you any questions I want now?” You swallow a bite as you say it.

“Sure, I’m not going to guarantee an answer, but sure.”

“What was on the flower, the one I gave you for your birthday?” He groans the moment you ask it.

“Please don’t make me say it, I know you know.” He sounds terribly embarrassed but you’re simply furrowing your brow in confusion. Are you supposed to know? You think on it for a few minutes, chewing thoughtfully before your eyes go wide.

“Was that a piece of my nightie that you ripped the first time we-“

“Yes.” 

Your face couldn’t possibly get any redder and your smile couldn’t possibly get any wider. 

“I didn’t take you for the sentimental type.” You can’t help but tease, he’s so rarely flustered in lighthearted moments like this.

“There are plenty of things you don’t know about me.” You hum softly at his response. “I’d like it if you did know them.” He always has to have the upperhand, he can never just let you tease him without leaving you breathless. 

“I’d like to know everything.” 

“I’d tell you everything.” He sounds so sincere. 

But he doesn’t sound ready.

“When you really want to.”  

He’s quiet, briefly, and then he reaches back to set his empty plate down next to you, you aren’t even halfway done with yours. You turn around as he stands, you didn’t hear him put his helmet back on but there it is. 

“It’s late princess, I need to go home.” 

There’s undeniably disappointment on your face as you stand, following him to the door. 

“You don’t want to stay? I’m pretty sure I owe you a reward.” You give him a hopeful smile and his glove covers your eyes, your heart is racing. 

There’s that wonderful hiss of air. It’s quickly becoming your favorite sound in the world. 

You’re practically vibrating with anticipation.

And then you feel a soft kiss on your forehead. 

In an instant the glove is gone and the helmet is back in place as if it had never moved. 

“Good night, sarad’ika.” You feel ridiculous as you pout at him. 

“You can’t be serious.”

He chuckles as he opens the door. 

“Are you really going to turn me down?”  You reach past him to try and close it again but he holds it open, still laughing. 

“Yes, I am. Tonight I am.” He’s got one foot out the door now.  

“Din… I’m giving you permission, I swear, it’s fine.” 

“I’m afraid it’s not gonna happen tonight, cyare”

For Maker’s sake you’re practically begging him. 

“Then when?” As you ask he leans forward, just a tiny bit.

“When you really want to.”  

And just like that he’s leaving, shutting the door behind him.

Cocky bastard.

I am no longer doing taglists so follow @lincolndjarinnotifs and turn on notifications to be notified when new chapters are posted !!

[just-dreaming-marvel]

LEGACY ~ 2

LEGACY MASTERLIST

< previous chapter

Word Count: 2,152ish

Summary: Y/N attends the party.

Notes: Reminder, this is the updated reader insert version of my story legacy.

One of the many perks to being Tony Stark’s daughter was that you got a whole floor of the Tower to yourself. It had everything you needed: a kitchen, living room, office, bedroom, bathroom, and a small lab. You didn’t leave your floor much over the next few days due to the amount of work Pepper needed your help with and your college assignments. Natasha forced you from your floor once a day for training. You had learned the hard way to never fight Natasha on going down to train, so you went when called.

Once Saturday rolled around, you had finished some major school project and what Pepper needed, including planning the night’s party. You began to get more anxious for the party, as you always did. You had been to a few of these parties that Tony held at the Tower, but you were really never allowed to go as yourself. Always the Stark Industries employee who just happened to be close to all of the Avengers. 

Before you got ready for the party, you decided to head to the lab and check in with Tony. She had been informed by Natasha that Bruce and Tony had hardly left the lab since the latest mission. It didn’t shock you, Tony was where you learned to lock yourself up in a room to focus on work. You found Tony in his lab, alone and mumbling to himself.

“What did we miss?”

“I’ll continue to run variations on the interface,” JARVIS responded to Tony’s mumbling. “But you should probably prepare for your guests. I’ll notify you if there are any developments.”

“Thanks, buddy.”

“Enjoy yourself, sir.”

“I always do.” Tony headed towards the doors as the lights automatically turned off behind him.

You moved into the hallway to make it look like you were just walking up. “Hey, Dad,” you greeted.

The smile he gave you didn’t quite reach his eyes. “Hey, sweetheart.” His arms came out to pull you in for a hug that he clearly needed.

“I was just heading in to come check on you.”

“That’s sweet of you.” He pulled back. “I’m fine.”

You gave him a look. “I don’t believe it. Nat says that you and Bruce have been locked up in the lab since I left you there days ago.”

“I’m fine. The tests aren’t going as hoped.”

“I’m sorry. Need any help?”

“Maybe after the party. Which brings up, is it all ready?”

“People are setting it up as we speak and the guests will begin showing up within the hour.”

“What would I do without you and Pep?”

“Still be a playboy.”

“Hey! That was low.”

You laughed. “Sorry, Dad. I love you.” You pressed a kiss to his cheek. “I’m going to go get myself ready. See you at the party?”

Tony nodded. “Of course.”

~~~

The main common area was already bustling with party goes when you finally arrived. Your outfit was simple, a pair of Vans and a black, knee-length, t-shirt dress. Something comfy, yet cute. You had stopped at the top of the stairs so that you could see how the party was going and to see where the Team was hiding out. Over playing pool, you found Steve and his friend, Sam, while Thor was chatting it up with some old war veterans not far from there. Rhodey, Maria, and Natasha were talking on the couch, Helen and Clint were outside on the balcony, and Bruce, who had a thing for Natasha but was too scared to say anything, was awkwardly standing around and looking at Natasha. Too busy observing, you didn’t notice Tony coming up from behind you. He slipped his arm through yours, linking them, and causing you to jump slightly. You looked over to see Tony wearing his usual multi-pieced suit and a pair of red shaded sunglasses.

“You look beautiful, kid,” Tony complemented. “I don’t think I’ll let you leave my side all night. Can’t have anyone trying to make moves on you. I’m not ready for that yet.”

“No one will be able to do anything, Dad,” you retorted as Tony began leading you down the stairs and towards the bar. “The Team will be on high alert for my safety as well as you. Besides, you forget that I can take care of myself. I’m sure that I can do way worse to anyone who tries to harm me.”

“I don’t doubt that,” he smirked.

Tony pulled his arm from yours behind leaning against the bar and ordering himself an alcoholic drink. You found yourself a different bartender and ordered a non-alcoholic drink. Thor, Maria, and Rhodey made their way over to the bar, each grabbing a drink before Rhodey started telling one of his War Machine stories.

“Well, you know,” he said, in the middle of the story when you finally began paying attention, “the suit can take the weight, right? So I take the tank, fly it right up to the General’s palace, drop it at his feet. I’m like, ‘boom. You looking for this?’” Tony and Thor stared at him unimpressed, waiting for something more from the story. You shot him a sympathetic smile. “Boom. Are you looking—Why do I even talk to you guys? Everywhere else that story kills.”

“That’s the whole story?” Thor questioned.

“Yeah, it’s a War Machine story.”

“Well, it’s very good then,” Thor laughed. “It’s impressive.”

“It’s a good one, Uncle Rhodey,” you added, trying to help the situation.

“Quality save,” Rhodey responded. “So, no Pepper? She’s not coming?”

“No,” Tony answered.

“What about Jane?” Maria asked. “Where are the ladies, gentlemen?”

“Umm…” you raised your hand, “I’m here.” Nobody seemed to care.

“Well, Ms. Potts has a company to run,” Tony said.

“Yes, I’m not even sure what country Jane’s in,” Thor added. “Her work on the convergence has made her the world’s foremost astronomer.”

“And the company that Pepper runs is the largest tech conglomerate on Earth. It’s pretty exciting.”

“There’s even talk of Jane getting a… un, uh, Nobel prize.”

You and Maria shook your heads as you shared a look, both believing this conversation was getting ridiculous. “Yeah, they must be busy because they’d hate missing you guys get together,” Maria commented.

“Testosterone,” you fake coughed, earning the stink eye from both Thor and Tony. “Oh, sorry, excuse me.”

“Let’s go,” Rhodey said to Maria, linking their arms together before walking away.

“Jane’s better,” Thor muttered as Tony took another sip of his drink.

“Well, not that this hasn’t been fun,” you started as you slowly backed away, “but I’m going to go mingle.” You turned and headed into the crowd.

“Be safe!” Tony called out.

You waved off your father as you entered the crowd. You had love-hate relationships with events like this. Pretending to just be an S.I. intern was nice sometimes, no questions that were too personal and no one was using you just to get close to your father and the Team. But then it also hurt, feeling like you couldn’t form true connections because you weren’t allowed to be your true self.

As you walked around the room, you noticed that Steve and Sam had moved up to the loft, looking over the party as they chatted. You and Steve made eye contact, causing you to send a smile and a wave. He responded in kind before you continued your walk around the party. You did this for most of the night, avoiding any real conversations besides telling a few of the workers what needed to be restocked and cleaned up. A few men did come up and try to flirt with you. Almost as soon as they started, they were scared off by something over your shoulder. You could only assume that it was Tony doing something to scare them off.

You eventually found a place to sit near where Thor, the veterans, and now Steve were hanging out. Thor pulled out an Asgardian flask and started passing it around. You rolled your eyes and went back to observing the rest of the partygoers. Slowly, your focus moved to the glass that you were holding, your finger running along the circular rim. Honestly, this party was more lonely than you thought it would be. So, you decided to stay put and lose yourself in the circular motions of your finger tracing the rim of your cup.

~~~

After trying some of Thor’s Asgardian liquor, Steve decided he needed to find a different crowd to be with, especially once the veterans tried to drink as much as they could. His eyes scanned the room to see where any of his other friends were. His eyes stopped at you. You were sitting alone on one of the couches, staring at your cup. Steve looked at you sympathetically, knowing that you had put so much work into this party only for you to end up alone. He headed for you, never taking his eyes away from you as he did. Stopping in front of you, Steve waited for a moment to see if you would notice. He smiled to himself when you didn’t notice and tapped your foot with his. Your eyes snapped up to look at him, your heart stopping for a brief moment upon meeting his caring, blue eyes.

“Hey,” Steve smiled down at you.

“Hey, Steve,” you replied. “What’s up?”

“I believe you promised me a dance.” He held out one of his hands.

You quickly glanced around the room. “But no one else is dancing.”

“And I don’t know how to dance.” He reached down and took a hold of your hands. “Let’s go.”

Steve pulled you up and led you to a small opening amidst the mingling crowd. There was music softly playing in the background, but not necessarily the type that people would slow dance to. Steve faced you and slipped one hand around your back before fixing the other to grip your hand better. Hesitantly, you rested your free hand on Steve’s shoulder, sending a silent prayer that Steve’s super hearing couldn’t pick up the sound of your pounding heart.

“This party is great,” Steve said, slowly guiding you around in a small circle. “You did really good.”

“Thanks,” you responded.

“How has your night been?”

“It’s been good. A bit lonely…”

“Why is that?”

You sighed. “I just don’t feel like I can make any true friendships since I have to pretend that I’m someone I’m not most of the time.”

Steve had never taken that into consideration, that you had to hide a lot of yourself from people. “I’m sorry… Tony is just trying to project you. There are dangerous people out there and with your…” Steve paused briefly as if he was trying to figure out the right thing to say, “past,” he finally got out. “We don’t know if there are people out there looking for you. Tony simply wants you kept safe… As do I.” You lost your breath for a brief moment. “Though, I do believe that you can handle more than Tony believes you can.”

“I know, since you did suggest that I was ready to join the Team.”

“I did say that, didn’t I?” Steve shook his head with a slight smile. “I shouldn’t say things that may get your hopes up.”

“Aren’t you the Captain of the Team? Can’t you make the call to put me on the roster? You know that I am more than ready. Besides, I’m an adult.”

“Yes, but Tony can be scary sometimes when it comes to your safety.”

“He needs to let me live a little. I can’t stay in this Tower forever. I’m not Rapunzel. I will find a way onto the roster, with or without my Dad’s permission.”

“I’m already scared of the plans you could come up with. Don’t try to trick me into letting you on the roster. It won’t work.”

“Well, dang it. Here I thought that I had you wrapped around my finger.”

“Don’t doubt that, doll.”

Suddenly, Steve spun you out, causing you to let out a squeal before spinning you back into his chest. People looked over at the scene, clearing judging, but neither of you cared, too much in your own little world. Steve pulled you closer than he had before, locking eyes with you. It didn’t go unnoticed by you that Steve’s gaze briefly fell to your lips. But before you knew it, Seteve had let you go and stepped back. You tried to hide the hurt and confusion that now filled you.

“Thank you for the dance, Miss Stark,” Steve bowed playfully, trying to defuse the awkward tension rising between them.

You quickly devices to play along, giving him a curtsy. “No, thank you, Captain Rogers.”

“I need to make a few more rounds.” He started backing away. “I’ll see you later.”

“Yeah… see you later…”

next chapter >

[queen-haq]

Fic: Never You, Part 9 (Polin fic)

Fandom: Bridgerton (TV show)

Spoilers: S3 released scenes.

Summary: They may have been friends once but his callous words decimated their relationship. Determined not to have anything to do with him, Penelope is ready to move on. But Colin isn’t giving up, not at all. Friends or not, they are connected for life - and he intends to remind her of that.

Excerpt:

“You would hate me for not wanting to court you. You would be that selfish?”

“Of course you would think that.”

“What else is this if not punishment?”

Masterlist (contains links to previous parts and my other stories)

A03 link if that’s more your jam

Chapter 9

Shame flooded over Penelope, she felt so very embarrassed to be caught in such a compromising position. Colin, on the other hand, simply rose to his full height, consequently blocking her view of Eloise. “Give us a second, El,” he commanded. His hair was ruffled from when her fingers ran through the strands, his face flushed, waistcoat unbuttoned, but he appeared unperturbed by his own flustered appearance. If anything, he was more concerned with tucking the loose strands of her hair behind her ear than dealing with his angry sister. “Are you alright?” he asked quietly, fixing the neckline of her dress that had been pulled low under his frantic grasp.

She quickly buttoned his vest before righting her own clothing. Wet marks from where his mouth had suckled her nipples stained her dress, and she froze for a second, horrified by the sight. What was she going to do? Under no circumstances could she return to the sitting room where others were present. They would know instantly something sordid had taken place.

As if reading her mind, he grazed her cheeks with his fingers. “Don’t worry, I’ll find you a shawl you can use.”

“How long have you been plotting this?” Eloise demanded, approaching them. Her words were directed at Penelope, tone saturated with anger. “You couldn’t use me anymore so now you’re manipulating Colin to get to my family?”

“That is not true!” Penelope defended herself. “I’ve been keeping my distance-”

“Yes, clearly. That must be why you were in the midst of swallowing his face,” Eloise snarked.

“What Pen and I do doesn’t concern you,” Colin remarked dryly, turning to confront Eloise.

“You don’t know her like I do, brother. You have no idea what she’s capable of!”

“I know she has never spoken ill of you but that hasn’t stopped you from slandering her.”

“Don’t fall for it, Colin. Her friendliness is a disguise, underneath she’s nothing but a petty, spiteful witch!”  

“And you’re not, Eloise?” Penelope fired back. Her attempts to confront Eloise face-to-face was hindered by Colin who caged her in a firm grip. “Your sudden friendship with Cressida has nothing to do with how horrible she is to me? I suppose you befriended her out of the goodness of your heart?”

“Cressida treats people the way they deserve.”

“By bullying them? No wonder the two of you are so close!”

“Are you chastising me for bullying? Isn’t that what you’ve been doing for years?”

An exasperated sigh escaped Colin. “The two of you were the best of friends, sisters practically, and now you’re bickering like fools. Is this really how you choose to conduct yourselves?”

“Do not lecture me when you were tupping her right here!” Eloise hissed.

“Enough!” His voice roared across the library, taking both women by surprise.

Colin wasn’t known to raise his voice. Usually calm, unlike Anthony, he used charm to diffuse precarious situations rather than his temper. Yet he’d already revealed his anger with Penelope when he was interrogating her earlier and now it was Eloise’s turn.

“Don’t you ever speak of her like that!” The violence in his voice was potent, causing Eloise to falter back as he directed his cold, seething rage at her. “I don’t give a fuck about what happened between you and Pen or who’s at fault. Whether you reconcile or not, I do not care. But do not make the mistake of insulting Penelope in my presence again, Eloise. You will not like the consequences of that!”

Eloise swallowed audibly. “So you would rather side with an outsider than your own sister?”

“She’s not an outsider to me.” There was no doubt in his voice, no hesitation as he leveled Penelope with a keen glance. “She matters more than you’ll ever know. And I will not let anyone disparage her.”

Penelope held his gaze, unable to look away.

“You must be pleased. You’ve already managed to turn him against me.”

Eloise’s pained tone snapped Penelope out of her daze, her heart squeezing with empathy. “Please, Eloise. It’s nothing like that. If we could just speak alone, I could explain to you-”

“Absolutely not,” Eloise interjected.

“I agree with El. It’s a terrible idea. I doubt the two of you can manage a civilized conversation,” Colin said in a highhanded tone, sounding much like Anthony.

“Stay out of it, Colin!” Penelope rebuked.

Eloise expressed a similar reaction. “You can not order me about. If I want to speak, I will!”

Spotting the fleeting twinkle in Colin’s eyes, it dawned on Penelope he had goaded Eloise on purpose; this outcome was exactly what he wanted. “Fine, then. I will be right outside the door. Hope you ladies can behave yourselves.” Concluding his impression of Anthony, he walked away.

They remained in place, silently eyeing each other. Seconds later, the door shut with a loud thud.

“I will not let you hurt my brother!” Eloise threatened. “If you think you can seduce Colin into marrying you, you’re wrong. It will not happen.”

“That is not what I want, Eloise! He…” Penelope swallowed the lump in her throat. “What you saw between us… I know it was wrong, I should have stopped him but I’ve loved him for so long and-”

“Love?” Eloise laughed mockingly. “You don’t even know what that is!”

“I love you, more than I love my own sisters. I miss you.”

“I do not believe you. You’re a liar!”

“I’m sorry that I hurt you, but you must know I had no choice. If I hadn’t published those things the Queen would have come after you!” 

Eloise shook her head. “Nothing you say can excuse what you’ve done. You’re a liar and a deceiver, that’s all you’re capable of.” Her eyes blazed with fury. “I haven’t revealed the truth about you out of respect for your family, they don’t deserve to suffer for your actions. But I will tell the Queen myself if you don’t stay away from mine. Then the whole world, and Colin, will know who you truly are!”

Penelope studied her friend, desperate to spot some form of sadness or yearning for their years long friendship. Something. Anything. But there was none, only contempt. And it finally dawned on her that their friendship had truly ended. With that realization came a swift flood of anger. “Then do it. Tell the Queen, tell everyone. Destroy me.” She approached Eloise with a slow, determined gait. “But realize that I’m not the only one you’ll be destroying. Lady Whistledown is a business. A successful, thriving one that benefits not only me but many of the working class. I employ servants, delivery boys, printing presses, coachmen. Even your friend Theo Sharpe. The extra money they earn allows them the freedom to pursue their dreams, to better their family’s lives. And you will be ending all of that.” Standing in front of Eloise, Penelope stared up at the other woman. Her gaze was direct, her voice cold. “So go ahead Eloise, do what you must. But do not be surprised when there are consequences to the choice you make. Word will eventually spread that it was you who dismantled their source of income, and they will not be happy.”

“Are you threatening me?” Eyebrow raised, Eloise stared down at Penelope with condescension. “You do take after your mother.”  

Penelope sent her a stiff smile. “You would do well to remember that.”

Eloise turned around and stormed out, leaving her alone in the library again. Her brave face dissipated instantly. Feeling sick, she clutched her stomach and closed her eyes. She took deep breaths to calm herself, her heart broken. Despite telling herself for months their friendship was over, she still harbored hope that she and Eloise would reconcile one day. But seeing the disdain Eloise held for her now, Penelope realized their friendship was irrevocably broken.

She opened her eyes to find Colin standing in front of her. The queasiness turned to butterflies, and her heart started pounding in her chest. After loving him for so long, she had finally come to terms with the fact he would never feel the same about her and she had moved on from that heartbreak. Had reconciled her mind to focus on a new love, new life – only to have Colin return and throw everything into chaos. Her temper rose. How dare he? How dare he turn her life upside down again?

“I suppose we don’t have to worry about Eloise telling others about us,” Colin noted.                                                                                             

“She wouldn’t.”

He stalked closer. “I gather things didn’t go well with Eloise.”     

“Impressive observation.”

He graced her with an amused smile. “Perhaps if I knew the cause of the rift, I could help resolve the issue.”

“Like you helped today?” she pointed out. “It’s best you stay out of it.”

“I will find out the truth. Sooner or later.”

And when he did, she had no doubt he would react the same way his sister did. Her heart grew heavy at the thought of him hating her. “I must go.” She tried to walk past him but he blocked her path, invading her personal space. He stood close, so close she had to look up at him.

His eyes were warm and intent roaming over her face, drifting down to her lips. “We need to discuss what happened last night.”

“There’s no need. I’d rather put it behind us and move on.”

The dark glint in his eyes returned. “Do you really believe I would allow that to happen?”

She peered up at him, her instincts signaling something was afoot. “When you came in earlier, you knew I would be alone.”

His fingers lightly grazed her own. “Yes.”

“But you came in anyway.”

“You were crying.”

“You kissed me on purpose.”

He leaned in, his breath humming against her skin. “We kissed, Penelope. Neither of us could resist the other.”

Her voice was a hushed whisper. “You knew my mother would send someone to look for me, didn’t you?”

He cocked his eyebrow.

“You wanted us to be caught.”

Silent, he watched her. “Yes.”

Rage flooded over her, she was so furious she could barely speak. “You have no care for my reputation, do you? It really doesn’t matter to you that you could have ruined me!” She shook her head at him with disgust. “You call yourself my friend but you’re not! You’re no better than the Cressida Cowpers of this society. You only want to humiliate me.”

She tried to push him away but he gripped her arms. Although she struggled against him, he was stronger, bracing her against his chest. “Did you leave me any choice, Penelope?” he demanded, his voice shaking with anger. “I asked you to be my wife and you turned me down. What else was I supposed to do? This was the only way to ensure you would marry me!”

“And what of my family? Or yours? Did you think about how this scandal would have affected them? Your sisters? Mine? Did you even care?”

His lips drew back in a snarl. “They would have survived. They always do. After we were married, things would have eventually returned to normal.”

She couldn’t wrap her mind around his words. “Who are you? What happened to you?” Tears glistened in her eyes. “The Colin I grew up with would never have been this selfish.”

“This is me! This is who I am now!” He gritted his teeth, eyes blazing with fiery determination. “And I will do anything to make you mine, Penelope.” His hands cupped her face, eyes boring into her. “You will never escape me.”

Fear trickled down her spine. Seeing him so desperate and passionate terrified her, because she knew it was fleeting. He didn’t love her, he only wanted to possess her. Like she was a toy. And when he was done playing with her, he would discard her and move on to someone else. No. She wouldn’t let that happen, no matter what. 

"You don’t want me to be your wife. I would ruin you." 

A small smile curved his lips. "Is that so?"

Her eyes lingered on him, taking in every inch of his beautiful face. Never would he look at her like this again and she wanted to commit everything about his adoring gaze to her memory. 

"I'm not a virgin, Colin. I have been with someone else, known another man's intimate touch." Her voice was blank, free of any emotion. "And we both know you wouldn't want a fallen woman as a wife."

Silence hung in the air. He immediately dropped his hands from her face, like he could no longer bear to touch her. His eyes burned right through her, gleaming with anger, accusation, even betrayal. 

As devastating as his response was, it wasn't a surprise. Turning around, she walked away.

[fangirlingfromdownunder]

A Sweet Mishap - Chapter 19

Pairing - Jensen Ackles x Reader 

A/N: I just want to start by thanking everyone for all the love on this story so far. Let me know if you want to be added to the tag list. This chapter is a little heavier (as is the story going forward, but I'll include potential triggers for each chapter as relevant), so please read the TW below and only read on if you feel comfortable doing so.

Potential Trigger Warnings: None

A Sweet Mishap Masterlist | Main Masterlist

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

I don’t give myself time to miss Jensen as I spend every spare minute preparing for the audition. I finally pick a song: Hopelessly Devoted To You. I want the best chance to show that I can be a good Sandy. Between memorising the monologue and lyrics, I work on staying active. There’s no way of knowing what the choreography will be, so I can’t practice that, but I can make sure I’m prepared for anything. I try to enact everything I’ve learnt in class. 

When I finally check my phone I see a bunch of texts from Jensen, mostly links to articles about relaxation.

Good luck with the audition tomorrow!You’ll do amazing!Don’t get too in your headJust relax and be yourselfI hope these articles help

I want to call him but know I need to rest my voice after hours of singing and rehearsing otherwise it will all be for nothing.

I’ll read them now Thanks

In the large auditorium, I collect my number and stick it to my shirt before heading with everyone else to the main stage. The director introduces herself and welcomes everyone before introducing the choreographer and leaving him to teach a routine. He leads a quick stretch and warm up to ensure no one’s going to pull a muscle or injure themselves before going through a jazz routine. We go over it a few times slowly with him counting us in and walking around the stage providing guidance were possible, before he puts on some music and leads it at a faster pace. I focus on hitting every beat and making each step while also steadying my breathing so I don’t panic. Once he’s satisfied with everyones understanding of the short dance he restarts the song and the director comes back onto the stage. She wanders around assessing everyone as we focus on the moves. Once the song comes to an end, she thanks everyone and ushers us back into the hall to wait for the next instructions. I take a seat on the ground leaning against a wall and sip water as I relax my body and steady my breathing and heartrate. While I sit there I also run through the monologue. 

Time passes slowly as I wait for my number to be called. As I wait one of the other girls sits beside me and we chat. I’m thankful for the welcome distraction as we help each other relax. When I finally hear my number she wishes me luck and I stand up and make my way back to the stage. As I enter the big doors again the sound mixer asks for my song selection, so I tell her and she lines it up while explaining to give her a nod when I’m ready. I then walk into the middle of the stage, marked with a red X made out of duct tape. The director welcomes me and tells me to start whenever I’m ready. I take a few deep breaths and nod over at the sound department. The notes of Hopelessly Devoted to You echo through the hall and I start to sing. I draw on old emotions from when I was devoted to men who cast me aside and tear up alittle. After the first chorus the music fades out and I relax for a beat before moving into the monologue. I deliver it with power, emotion and passion. When I finish she thanks me and urges me to wait in the hall. 

I know better than to get my hopes up or get too disappointed too early, so I go to the bathroom and splash some water on my face to quell the adrenaline and nerves. I know they won’t announce callbacks until the end of the day, so I find a secluded space outside yet undercover and out of the freeing breeze and light drizzling snow. I pull out my phone and in lieu of messaging the person who got me into the mess in the first place, I message Jensen.

Audition’s done. Just waiting for them to announce callbacks So nervous

A few seconds later his name pops up on my screen. I slide across to answer.

“How’re you feelin’?” he asks in his deep Texan drawl.

“I already told you. Nervous!”

“That’s normal, but how do you think you went? You happy with your performance?”

“Yeah. I’m proud of myself.”

“That’s my girl. I’m proud of you too. Give me a reason to come watch some broadway.”

“You’ll be back in Vancouver by the time live shows start.”

“I get weekends. I’d make time to come see you.”

“If you start coming to New York regularly people are gona start asking questions.”

“Let ‘em. I don’t care. I’d only be worried about it impacting you, but I can be discreet. We can make it work.”

“I gotta get a callback first. Let’s not get ahead of ourselves. I know you wouldn’t have had to do auditions in a while, but surely you remember the process and slim chances.”

“All too well. But I can tell by the state of your apartment that you take rejection better than I used to…I remember putting my fist through a wall and then calling my dad in tears.”

“I’ve never put my fist through a wall, but there’s definitely been tears.”

“Yeah, it’s a rough industry, but I have every faith that you can- Uh, sorry, Darlin’, I gotta go, my agent’s calling.”

“Alright, I’ll text you later,” I say before the line goes silent.

As the sun starts to set the chill sets in. I wander back into the heated foyer. People of all ages sit or stand around the room, mostly engrossed in their phones or idle chatter while they move from foot to foot or bounce their leg. A few girls in the far corner are even doing star jumps and squats. The room is a weird stale mix between body odor, deodorant and perfume. I miss the fresh air of outside, but my chilled body welcomes the super charged heat. I find a free patch of carpet by the door and sit down. My foot taps quietly against the floor in my high-top boots. 

After what feels like an eternity, an assistant that I’d seen around earlier comes out of the stage doors with a stack of papers. She ushers a group away that are leaning against a large cork board before slowly pinning up each sheet. I know the same pages will be scanned onto their website by morning, but there’s nothing quite like the atmosphere in the room; it’s one of the things I like about stage productions over TV or movies where they just get your agent. I patiently wait as the people closer to the board crowd around before either cheering or sighing and storming or sulking out of the foyer into the cold, dark night. As I’m watching people react to the casting I spot the girl I was talking to before my audition. She looks over her shoulder and skims around the room before she spots me and waves me over with a smile. I quickly throw my backpack over my shoulder and hurry over to join her. 

“Let’s find out together. Good luck!” She says as I catch up to her.

Despite Sandy being the lead role and the one that most girls dream of, she said she had a soft spot for Frenchy, and the cotton-candy pink hair to match. So I’m glad to go up with someone who is not in direct competition, although even if she was, I’d be a good sport about it. She grabs my hand and squeezes as she pulls me through the small crowd to read the cast list. My eyes go straight to the top of the list, but next to Sandy is Mary Jacobs. I scan down the first page just to make sure I didn’t get cast in any other role. Finally on the third page across I find my name, I feel a bubble of hope at getting a role, even if it is just: Female Student #3 - Ensemble. I accept my fate with a sullen smile as my new friend motions to the final page: the list of understudies. She holds two fingers on the page as she smiles at me. My jaw drops as I see my name in the third column next to Sandy Olsson and hers next to Frenchy.

“It means we could still get a matinee performance…Or if the lead God forbid falls sick for a night…” She offers with a hopeful smile.

“Looks like we’re going to be seeing a lot more of each other, fellow understudy.”

We step back and input our numbers into each other’s phones so we can keep in contact about the rehearsals. We share a quick meal together at a closeby fast food joint in the city as we gush over our future roles and how awesome it’s going to be to perform on the big stage for real finally. We become quick friends and my nerves settle slightly at knowing that I’ve got someone in my corner as I go into this new world. 

On the subway I text Jensen:

May I introduce to you……Drum roll please…Female Student #3…

His little speech bubble pops up and disappears multiple times.

And understudy for Sandy!I’m gonna be on broadway, Baby!!

You’re happy?

We can’t all get the lead Understudy to the lead isn’t bad There’ll likely be a chance that I’ll get to do a matinee I got a part I’ve never even gotten ensemble before So to get that as well as understudy for the lead

I guess I’m not used to understudies We don’t exactly have an understudy in TV Stunt doubles, sure But not understudies But if you’re happy, I’m happy

I’m happy

I’m glad I’m so so proud of you

Can I call you later?I just wanna call my mom and tell her too

You told me before your parents? I’m honored But tonight’s not gonna be good for me I’m having drinks with a friend Call tomorrow?

Sure Enjoy your night

You too, Darlin’ And congratulations!

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ───

Taglist: @stoneyggirl2 @hobby27, @n-o-p-e-never, @deansimpalababy,

@winchesterwild78, @kr804573, @chriszgirl92, @smoothdogsgirl

@speakinvain, @deans-baby-momma

[pensat-i-fet]

Sweet treats (Micky van de Ven x Reader)

**A lovely anon suggested this could be a cute idea for a fluffy imagine and it inspired me to write a quick one. Hope you guys like it ❤️**

Word count: 1750

Masterlist

Wattpad

Creating social media content was one thing people thought was very easy to do. But it really wasn't. Trends kept changing and the algorithm was absolutely ruthless. So life as a content creator was not that easy. Also, you hated the word influencer but kept being called that.

What you could influence, or should we say who you could influence, was your boyfriend. Because you had him wrapped around your finger and he'd do anything you needed him to do for you.

“Micky!”, you called while you walked around the house with your laptop in your hands. “I need your pretty face to get more likes. The last few posts didn't do well”.

“Huh?”

Micky took his earphones off to listen to what you were saying while he got up from the bench where he was lifting weights…shirtless.

“Give me a second…”, you said, placing your laptop on the floor and grabbing your phone to take a photo of your boyfriend. “That would get a lot of likes but it's going to my private collection. Not sorry”.

“What are you doing?”, laughed Micky.

“Brainstorming. I don't know what I can post next but I need you to be in the post. It gets more likes”.

“Brave of you to tell me you only want me for the likes”.

“I was literally drooling 10 seconds ago. I also want you for the abs”.

Micky laughed and kissed your cheek before finding a towel to remove the sweat from his face.

“We could do a couples workout. People like that”.

“It's not a bad idea”, you nodded, adding that to your list of potential post ideas. “I could get a brand to sponsor it if I wear their clothes”.

“I like it when you wear sexy workout clothes”.

“I bet you do…I'm fine with you only wearing your Spurs shorts like you're doing now. But wear a t-shirt if we film this video. Only I get to see you wearing so little”.

“You and my teammates”, he laughed.

“Yeah…lucky boys”.

At the beginning of your relationship, you were more reticent about posting about Micky. You were aware that dating him made your content more popular but you also wanted to build your own career without his help. Also, there was the worry that Micky would think you were just using him to get more popular on social media. But it was also so much fun to film content with Micky. And he joked but he didn’t mind being in the posts at all.

“I wish people knew how hard you actually work”, said Micky when he saw you sitting down on the floor writing.

So a week later, once you had the sponsorship you wanted, you both got ready to film the video. While you waited for him to get to the gym, you kept writing in your notebook the exact names of the clothes you had picked from the collection sent to you. You’d need to tag them on the post and people would want to know the exact model. Then you had to link the pieces on the stories you posted too…

“It’s a lost battle, babe. But let’s get ready for our video”.

The video performed well. You had told Micky to repost it on his stories a day after it was posted and that made the brand from the sponsorship happy because it drove a lot of traffic to their website. But reading the comments made you overthink. They were mostly positive but you noticed that what people liked were your interactions with Micky. They wanted to see the real you, not the parts where it looked like you were reading from a script. Because you were actually reading from a script.

“People like us”, you told Micky when you sat down next to him, still reading comments.

“I would hope they do…”.

“No, I mean they like our relationship. Our banter. There are so many comments calling us cute”.

“Well, we are cute”, said Micky, smiling and wrapping his arms around your waist to bring you closer to him. “We can make more videos together. You know I don’t mind”.

“Yeah…not so soon after this one. But I’ll ask people what content they want to see and I’m sure lots of requests will include you”.

“Your fans like me more than they like you then”, he teased.

“I can’t blame them for that. I like you quite a bit too”.

One of the things people wanted you to do was a Q&A. Easy content so you got a lot of questions ready for a live on Instagram where you could answer them.

“Alright, everyone. I thought I would make this a bit more fun by also baking while I answer your questions. And I’m terrible at baking so this should be interesting but…you can’t go wrong using cake mix, right?”, you looked at the camera pretending to be scared. “Right?”

The first few questions were the usual ones so you got those out of the way while you mixed all the ingredients. The oven beeped to let you know it had finished pre-heating so you put the cake mix inside of it and set a timer.

“Now I can answer questions better…”.

By the time you had already spent 10 minutes answering questions, you heard the front door. Micky wasn’t supposed to be back so early, which is why you were doing the live then.

“Hi! What are you doing?”

“Umm…a live on Instagram. Wanna say hi?”

The reaction to Micky joining the live was the one you’d have expected. But it also worried you because people would think you did it on purpose and you hadn’t.

“What were you doing? The kitchen is full of flour”.

“Baking…”.

“Baking a cake for me?”

“For both of us”, you laughed. “I also wanted to try and do a cupcake recipe but I already embarrassed myself struggling with the cake mix in front of our lovely audience”.

“I could help you do the cupcakes. So they all laugh at the both of us”.

The issue with livestreams was that you either were too worried about what people saw, like before Micky arrived, or you forgot there was a livestream going on. The latter happened when Micky joined you. It was so easy for you to forget the rest of the world existed when he was around.

“When did you learn to bake?”, you asked Micky, noticing how well he followed the recipe.

“I didn't”.

“You're really good at it for someone who didn't learn”.

“I guess I did a bit of baking with my family but I’m no expert”.

Once the cupcakes were ready to go in the oven, you both waited for the cake to be done and answered some more questions. The live had been going on for almost an hour by then.

“Should we decorate the cake?”

“What do you have for that?”, asked Micky, looking around.

“Frosting and sprinkles. I’m not going to the next edition of Great British Bake Off like you are”.

“They should invite me to the celebrities edition”.

“Hey Channel 4”, you said, looking at the camera. “You heard him!”

Micky thought you could write your names on the cake and then try and do some funny designs. A bit ambitious for someone who didn’t know how to bake.

“How big do you think this cake is, babe?”, you laughed. “Maybe we can write the names here and save the rest of the frostings for the cupcakes”.

“Ok…”.

You were also impressed by how nice his handwriting was…while using frosting. That just seemed unfair. But you were also used to Micky being good at almost everything he did.

“I’ll order my next birthday cake to the van de Ven bakery”.

“They’ll probably give you a discount too”.

“In exchange for what?”

“A kiss?”, he asked, leaning down to kiss you. Again, you had both forgotten about the livestream but the people watching were loving your interactions.

When the cupcakes were out of the oven, you mentioned decorating a few and ending the livestream. But when you were about to start, your mum called you.

“I need to answer this”.

“Ok guys”, whispered Micky to the camera when you were gone. “I made this one for her. What do you think?”

He showed the cupcake he had decorated with a bit of frosting to make a heart. Then he used sprinkles to write your initial. He saw the responses were mostly full of heart emojis and smiled.

“But we’ll need to finish this live now. It’s been going on for too long but it was fun. We’ll see you soon. Bye!”

Talking to your mum was always nice but you also couldn’t wait to eat some cupcakes so when you ended the call, you went back to the kitchen quickly.

“I ended the live”, announced Micky. “And made these for you”.

“Thanks…”.

Seeing all the different decorations on the cupcakes made your jaw drop. How on Earth did he manage that?

“You like them?”

“Are you for real? Have you always been an artist and kept that information from me?”

Micky laughed. “I just felt inspired today”.

“These are perfect”, you told him, kissing his cheek. “You’re literally the sweetest”.

“Sweeter than the cupcakes?”

You nodded, forgetting about the cupcakes to just focus all your attention on your sweet boyfriend.

What seemed like just an anecdote ended up becoming a tradition. A very sweet tradition. Soon after the day of the livestream, you went on a little work trip and came back home after 3 days out of the country. Knowing Micky was still at training when you got home, you just made your way to the room to take a shower. But then when you got back to the kitchen, you noticed a box on the kitchen island.

“No way”, you laughed picking up the box. It had van de Ven bakery written on it and when you opened it, you found more cupcakes baked by Micky. The order they were placed in spelled welcome home and your smile couldn’t get any bigger.

That started the tradition of Micky baking for you whenever you needed a little sweat treat. When you were working too much, when you weren’t feeling great or whenever you achieved something big. Micky always made sure to get cupcakes and cakes ready to make your life sweeter. But he still was sweeter than all the treats. 

[spookychick78]

Final Girl

We’ve Only Just Begun

Michael Myers X AFAB!Reader

Warnings: None

Word Count: 429 (they get longer, I promise)

Okay, so I wanted to post my Wattpad works on here too for y’all, I would post the whole story all at once, but I can’t figure out how. So I’m just gonna post them one by one then put them in a masterlist so here we go k anywayy

this was also the first fic I wrote so the chapters are a little shorter than my usual stuff, but I am currently rewriting it as an original story (since no one else but us will accept Michael as a romantic) that I hope to share with you guys soon! The chapters are also named after songs, which I’ll link. Fun fact, I’m a musician so it just made sense to include music, the lyrics were like a bonus part to each chapter in my head. But, let’s get on with it.

She stood there staring at the two pink lines on the test in her hand, her mind torn between joy and sheer terror. She knew it was stupid to hope he'd react happily, but couldn't help holding on to the fantasy in her head. The hand she was dealt was terribly different than the one she'd dreamt of as a girl. She had fallen in love, or so she thought. He was everything she wanted in the beginning. Kind, loving, fun, but the mask began to slip. It was gradual, slow enough to keep her from running, but he had changed nonetheless. Seeing her happy wasn't met with joy anymore, but a seemingly sick desire to tear it away from her weakening grip. Loving touches turned intimidating, never knowing when they'd leave a bruise that she'd have to work to cover up. She couldn't seem to please him anymore, but it didn't stop her from trying with what little energy she had left.

And now this. She knew. She knew this meant trouble. It made her sad to think it, seeing as most couples would be over the moon seeing these two little lines. But to her, even though she wanted it so badly, they made her stomach churn.

Footsteps down the hall made her hurriedly grab the nearest drawer and shove the test under the miscellaneous junk that lay in it. She wasn't ready to face that battle just yet. It had already been fight after fight for so long, she knew she'd need time to prepare for this one. She looked over herself in the mirror, making sure there was nothing in her eyes that would give her away. With a deep breath, she turned the handle and silently walked down the hallway to their shared room.

Her husband turned to look up at her from his desk, not bothering to return the smile she gave him.

"I should probably get going," she said as she grabbed her purse, "I'm already late."

He scoffed, turning back to his computer. Normally she would fight for some sort of reaction. His newfound indifference to her usually angered her more than she would like to admit. She let her smile fall and ignored the pit in her stomach as she walked down the stairs and out the door.

The cool air was a relief from the claustrophobic atmosphere permeating her home. It was fall, her favorite season and despite the growing sadness in her heart, she let her smile return as she breathed in the crisp air. Halloween was coming.

[moonferry]

fsioy chapter 2 !!!

chapter two is now DONE. this took forever but here u go. for those who don't know, forever stuck in our youth (fsioy) is my story about kent/jodi from sdv where i dive into their backgrounds and write an origin story of the two.

chapter word count: 1438

chapter summary: kent continues his search for a job, but notices a small help wanted sign in the store he and jodi entered. he asks jodi about it and learns that her mother is hiring. he eagerly asks for jodi to help him get the job, jodi says she will, but only if kent does her a favor.

ao3 link: here

other chapters: chapter masterlist

So, Kent had managed to not find a job like he had intended, but he also made himself look like a fool in front of a pretty girl. As far as “bad days” go, this was a pretty good turnabout - usually it's much worse. At least the girl - Jodi, she said her name was - had stopped glaring at him. That was a positive. As Kent readied himself to leave once again, he noticed a small “help wanted” sign plastered in the bottom left corner of a window. 

“Hey, Jodi?” Kent asked, turning back around to face the other. Maybe today will turn out okay after all! Well, that’s if the job was still open. 

“Hmm?” Jodi hummed back, glancing up from her task of sorting the massive stack of books in front of her. 

Kent walked closer to the window and investigated the sign. It looked relatively new, so maybe he had a chance. Kent pointed at the small sign as he looked back towards Jodi. “Do you know who’s hiring? I’m.. sort of.. Looking for a job.” 

“Oh, that’s easy!” Jodi chirped back. A wide, helpful smile plastered itself across her round cheeks. “My mother. Usually, my brothers help out around the store, but they’re all overseas.” She explained. 

Kent gave a small nod before thinking to himself. This was amazing! It was as if some mystical force had led him here on purpose. He muttered a small “thank you” prayer to Yoba beneath his breath before speaking once again, “Do you think your mother would be interested in hiring me? I can be very helpful.” 

Jodi raised an eyebrow, motioning to the stack of books on the counter - as if trying to remind Kent that he caused them all to scatter across the street. She simply shrugged her shoulders, “I could ask, if you want.” 

“That would be so great, thank you!” Kent’s eyes lit up at Jodi’s response. He felt a small wave of hope wash over him. That was soon crushed when he noticed Jodi still had her eyebrow raised and her arms neatly crossed over her chest. 

“I’ll ask her, if you do something for me,” Jodi clarified. 

Kent should’ve expected this. He mentally facepalmed before nodding. He spoke with a little more desperation in his voice than necessary, “Anything. I’ll do anything.” 

Jodi moved her hand to the bottom of her chin, deep in thought. Kent’s mind raced with the possibilities of what she would ask of him. She wouldn’t ask him - a total stranger - to do something completely outrageous would she? After all, he just knocked over a few books, all of which he promptly picked up and brought to the store. He even apologized 12 times. Twelve. Besides, Jodi didn’t seem like the type of person to hold grudges. 

“Okay, I’ve got it,” Jodi spoke after a long bout of silence. She walked around the counter and placed a stack of large, heavy books into Kent’s arms, “You are going to prove you can be helpful. We have an hour until my mother comes back and I was supposed to sort these while she was away.” 

Reasonable enough, Kent thought. What was sorting a few books for a job? If anything, he was getting the better end of the deal here. Or so he thought. Kent took his large stack of books and followed Jodi into a nearby room. His jaw nearly hit the floor as he looked around at the room: it was completely filled with tall, leaning stacks of books. This was what they had to sort? 

“All of these?” Kent exclaimed, nearly dropping the book in his hand due to his amazement. 

“Every single one,” Jodi replied. A small, tired sigh slipped from her lips. She pulled up a set of nearby chairs and motioned for Kent to take a seat. 

“Are you serious?” Kent asked once again, his eyes widening in a panicked surprise. “This is going to take forever,” He protested, a small amount of disbelief filling his words. 

“Then we better get started,” Jodi replied. She laughed at Kent’s protest - even his hair seemed to droop with the news of what they were doing. She had covered her mouth with the back of her hand to hide her smile - her eyes crinkling up into small crescents. 

Kent felt that familiar feeling again: his heart doing small jumping jacks in his chest. He glanced at Jodi and was awestruck. Even surrounded by old, musty books, she was still incredibly beautiful. Not to mention the melodious sound of her laugh. If Kent could’ve recorded it and turned it into a cassette, he would’ve listened to it until the tape erupted from the edges. But he shook his head and pushed that thought from his mind. They had a lot of work to do - so, unfortunately, no time for day-dreaming. 

The two worked in silence for the remaining hour, it was only interrupted by the soft chime of the bell above the store’s entrance. Jodi’s mother must finally be returning. As if to further prove Kent’s point, a distant voice called out. 

“Jodi? Are you here?” The voice spoke, followed by the soft sound of footsteps approaching the backroom where Kent and Jodi were stationed. 

“Yes, mother,” Jodi answered. She stood and moved to greet her mother. She motioned towards Kent and introduced him. “This is Kent. He noticed the help wanted ad.”

Kent stood and gave a polite smile to the older woman. He extended his hand. 

Jodi’s mother eyed him warily, scanning both his and her daughter’s face to try and determine if anything nefarious had taken place. She was not a big fan of Jodi bringing a complete stranger into their backroom - especially if he was a potential job candidate. 

“Jodi,” She hummed, motioning for her daughter to approach. Jodi did before leaning into her mother as the woman whispered something unintelligible in her ear. Whatever was said caused Jodi to shake her head in protest. The woman nodded and spoke once again, “Okay, dear. Go get cleaned up for dinner. I’ll be up as soon as I chat with this young man.” With this, Jodi left the room - leaving Kent alone with her mother. 

The woman’s expression hardened and she crossed her arms over her chest - Kent seemed to notice where Jodi got it from. In fact, Jodi and her mother would be nearly identical if it wasn’t for the height difference or the graying in the older woman’s roots. 

“Keith, right?” She began, still looking at Kent with an intensity that could cause glass to break. 

“It’s Kent, ma’am,” He politely corrected. Kent continued to smile politely, waiting on the woman to continue. 

“Right. Well, you’re here for a job, yes?” The woman asked. As she said this, Kent could have sworn a small flash of suspicion overtook her features. Kent knew he didn’t look like much: barely 5 '10, scrawny, and his hair sticking up in places that made it look like he had just rolled out of bed, but he had a good heart. As much as he hated to, he would invoke the “grief” card and mention his father. 

“Yes, ma;am. I saw the sign in the window,” He explained.

Jodi’s mother’s eyes darted across Kent - seemingly making him even more conscious of his flaws. He wanted to curl up into a ball and shield himself from her prying eyes. It was as if she was judging his very soul. This “inspection” lasted far longer than it needed to and Kent felt the perspiration of sweat form on his brow. 

“Alright. You seem trustworthy enough. The job is yours,” She spoke, her lips forming into a small line - as if she was dissatisfied that she hadn’t found anything that would let her turn Kent away. Kent let out a small sigh of relief, releasing the breath he hadn’t realized he was holding. 

“Thank yo-” Kent started, though he was soon interrupted by another glare from the woman in front of him. 

“I am giving you this job on one condition: you will not, under any circumstances, try to woo my dear Jodi, do you understand?” The woman spoke, a small amount of venom lacing her words. 

Kent gulped and nodded frantically. His eyes widened a bit in fear. Sure, he thought Jodi was really pretty, but the two had just met. He wasn’t going to ask her to marry him or anything - especially not after knowing each other for a number of hours. Kent took a deep breath and nodded once more - much calmer this time. “I understand.”

[mxnkeydo]

so scarlet (it was maroon) ✧ sokeefe

✧ ship: Sophie x Keefe

✧ what to expect: it all went down went a book went soaring across the classroom but sophie never expects it to end the way it does. acrylic smeared on cheeks, pigment-stained clothes, and a whole keefe sencen later, maybe she never despised him as much as she thought she did.

✧ genre: romance, fluff, humor, sarcasm - enemies to lovers trope, human au, and a love triangle to torment you guys 😈

✧ word count: 2.1k

✧ warnings: swearing, verbal and physical abuse

✧ link to masterlist

✧ link to chapter seven

✧ A/N: This chapter might seem random but I promise it's headed somewhere just hang in with me! also, this chapter killed me to write but it was sm fun I hope ya'll like it!!

✧ taglist: @swans-chirping-in-the-distance @somerandomhuman080 @foxglove-and-foxfire-lover @carolineforbae

reblogs would be most appreciated! :)))

***

CHAPTER EIGHT

“Hi,” Sophie said breathlessly as Fitz looked up from his phone. Immediately, he broke into a smile and tucked it into the pocket of his jeans.

“Hey, Sophie,” he greeted her. As she sat down in the seat across from him, he pressed a kiss to her cheek. Normally, it would feel romantic, but for some reason…she didn’t enjoy it like she usually did. Sophie pushed that thought far behind everything else and looked around the cafe. The hustle was lesser and calmer than usual, just the way she liked it.

“Let’s order, yeah?”

“Oh…I already did. I got a black coffee, and for you, a venti caramel apple frappuccino. I thought you’d like it.”

“Oh. That’s–that’s nice.”

Sophie forced a grin, inwardly cringing. She hated anything apple flavored, and she had hoped Fitz would know what she liked by now, but–oh well. Everyone makes mistakes, right?

But then she thought about the times she and Keefe had gone to Starbucks, how he’d memorized her favorite drink word for word.

“I’ll have a java chip frappuccino,” he’d said once to the barista. “And for the lady, a triple venti, half-sweet, non-fat–”

“-Caramel macchiato,” Sophie had finished. “You remember?”

“Of course I do.”

And then she thought of the incident right before, caught in Keefe’s arms, making a fool of herself. Sophie always knew she was a klutz, but she never made it a big deal. So why was it a big deal in front of Keefe Sencen? And what exactly had happened in that moment? She swore something had been there between them, something in the way he looked at her, like– like she was truly someone worth noticing. 

“-Sophie? Sophie!”

Sophie startled, only to see her caramel apple frappuccino sitting in front of her, along with a steaming cup of coffee. She chuckled and gingerly took it in her hands, pretending to take a sip and then consequently tugging at an eyelash. “Sorry, I think I’m a little tired today.”

“No, it’s alright. I get it.” Fitz slurped his coffee loudly, gazing at her. “Sophie, do you love me?”

The question caught her so off guard, she almost dropped her drink. 

“What?”

“I said, do you love me?”

Sophie stuttered, searching for an answer that she liked and didn’t offend Fitz. An uncomfortable beat of silence passed before he sighed disappointedly and said, “Forget it.”

Love. Teenage romance was something else entirely, and in the movies it always turned out well. Reality, on the other hand, was a whole different story. Sophie liked Fitz – she liked him a lot. But she couldn’t say she loved him. Telling him that would mean lying to both him and herself, and that wasn’t fair to either of them.

“It’s just…I'm not ready yet. I need time.” Sophie set her drink on the table. “But I do enjoy spending time with you, Fitz.” Fitz smiled gently, but she knew it was forced. She gave him one back as she took another pretend-sip of the frappuccino

“So…how are you?’ Fitz asked to break the silence.

“I’m doing good,” she replied. “School’s been fine, the tutoring sessions from Keefe are really helping. What about you? I know the final exams are soon.” 

Was it just her, or did he stiffen up when she mentioned Keefe? Glancing up at him she noticed the tension in his shoulders, his clenched jaw. What was up with that? She made a mental note to ask Keefe about it later.

Sophie glanced at the wall clock in the cafe when Fitz wasn’t looking; the space between them was sensitive, and it was best if she got out of the situation as soon as possible. She waited through seven awkward minutes before saying, “Hey, could you excuse me? My family wants me at dinner tonight and I’m supposed to help make it, so…”

“Yeah. Of course.” Sophie waved and stood up, weaving her way through the round little tables until she burst out into open air. The first thing she did was drop that frappucino in the trash bin, breathing a sigh of relief as she walked to the park across the street that bordered a small reservoir. There was so much going on inside her brain, problems popping up one after another; her relationship with Fitz, whatever was going on with Keefe, not failing her art elective. If she thought hard enough, she could come up with multiple issues from every aspect of her life. But for now, she wanted to forget.

The park was empty, with only an elderly couple fishing near the water's edge. Sophie heard the old man laugh heartily as the woman tried operating the fishing rod to no avail, and the sound warmed her heart right to the core. She settled on a bench in the open sun, basking in its warmth. It cast its rays over her body, making her feel like she was wrapped in a blanket. It settled her restless thoughts, soothed her racing mind. Sophie looked out to the trees in the distance, the mountains far beyond it, and the sun slowly retreating behind them as the moon rose to its full glory. Sophie had always been fond of the crescent moon; it reminded her that even if she wasn’t whole and perfect, she was still beautiful. She was still enough. 

All that was going on with Fitz faded into the back of her mind while she counted the stars one by one. When that got boring, she made her way down to the calm waters and stepped out of her shoes to feel the sand settle between her toes. Cold, gentle waves splashed her feet, and the steady beat of it lulled her to sleep. Sophie thought about her curfew, how Grady would be so upset that she was out past eight with no special occasion, but she’d deal with that later. For now, she savored the calmness of her mind. It was just her and the universe, and everything else ceased to exist. For now, everything was okay.

***

The rose bushes surrounding the house were dead. They had wilted, their hue a deep, squeamish, reddish-black. Keefe crushed one of them in his hands, ignoring the sharp thorns that pierced the sensitive skin of his wrist.

He’d been pacing the backyard, waiting until his father went to sleep so he could sneak in, peacefully. Already, three hours had passed; he could probably grow a beard in the time Cassius took to go to bed. What was he doing anyway, a skincare routine? Keefe snorted softly at the image of his father carefully applying creams and serums to his face. 

Keefe let out a long breath as he crouched next to the rotten bed of bell peppers. His mother had tended to them when she was alive; he could vaguely picture her slim figure in the garden, watering the little plants she’d worked so hard to plant. She, too, wasn’t  the best mother – often, she’d forget he existed and act as if she never heard him, and she also believed he was a waste of space – but at least his father wasn’t as abusive when she was still there. It was her passing that had him falling into a pit of insanity. But whenever he used to try bringing up her name, Cassius would shut him down and lock himself in his room. Whether it was out of love for Gisela or out of frustration on Keefe, he never understood.

A chilly breeze danced across his bare arms, making a shiver run through his spine. The sun had already sunk three-fourths of the way below the horizon, and it really was starting to get cold. Keefe hugged himself, but it was no match for the winds. It may have been mid-spring, but it sure didn’t feel like it. The cold, paired with his racing thoughts, were enough to make him feel chilled to the bone.

He had no other choice. Keefe made his way to the front door and opened it with his spare keys, tip toeing inside with almost no sound.

Almost.

It was dark in the main hall, and he could barely see anything. Keefe patted the wall next to him, searching for the light switch. He felt his fingers brush against something cold and immediately pushed it, expecting the chandelier to light up, but instead all he heard was a deafening crash. Keefe grimaced and released a string of curses under his breath as he heard footsteps from upstairs. Even he didn’t know what was in store for him today. Cassius would probably go ballistic at the mess he had made. Keefe grimaced as he heard thundering footsteps approach him at a rapid speed.

“What the fuck?” Cassius growled as he switched on the light, eyes blazing as he eyed the broken vase at the house entrance. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing, boy?”

“I- sorry,” Keefe whispered, locking his eyes on his feet. There was a tense silence before Cassius walked down the steps and walked towards him, grabbing the front of his t-shirt.

“Being the useless son you are, letting you live in this house was a mercy,” Keefe’s father managed to grit out. Keefe could basically see the steam rising from his ears as he continued, “I could have kicked you out long ago, boy, leave you out on the streets with the rats.”

“I’m your son,” Keefe whispered, his voice impossible hoarse but steady at the same time. “You would do that to your son?”

“You’re no son of mine!” Cassius slammed him into the wall behind him with great force, more than Keefe had anticipated. He groaned as he sank to the floor, thinking Cassius was off his back, but he yanked him up to his feet again. “You think you’re so smart,” he hissed. “When you’re nothing but a waste. You aren’t good for anything, are you? Useless bitch.” Cassius slapped him, jerking Keefe’s head to the side. He cupped his cheek as the sting reverberated through his bones. Instinctively, she shied away, leaning against the wall for support so his back wouldn’t hurt as much.

“Why are you doing this?” Keefe asked desperately, his voice ragged. “Is it because of Mom? Are you high?”

“Are you talking back, boy?” Cassius breathed, his eyes practically glowing his barely restrained fury. 

“Yes I’m talking back! Why do you hate me so much?” Keefe’s carefully built walls threatened to break, but he swallowed the tears and summoned his years’ worth of anger. “I have done nothing to you!”

“You’re a nuisance, that’s what! You’re nothing but a waste of space, and you’d be a fool to believe otherwise.” 

“I haven’t bothered you for anything. Anything. It’s like you hate me for existing!” Keefe yelled, raising his voice. His words echoed throughout the empty house. “And I’m tired of the shit you’ve put me through.” Keefe shut his mouth, waiting for a response - physically or verbally, or both. 

“You’re an ungrateful kid, you know that?” Cassius snarled. “I give you food, a place to live, and you’re complaining?”

“A real father would love me for who I am,” Keefe said firmly. “All I’ve ever wanted is your approval, for you to appreciate me and love me.” Keefe’s voice broke halfway, and he let out a strangled sob before saying, “Why is that so hard for you? Why can’t you just accept me?”

“Because who you are is a lazy, good for nothing bitch,” Cassius barked. “Other parents would do what I do too, if they had you for a son.”

“You’re only gaslighting yourself if you keep believing that.”

In a rage, his father kicked him in the shoulder with a grunt, smirking as he crumpled to the floor. “All I’ve given you, and you still want more. I advise you to shut your mouth if you don’t want any more trouble than you’ve already created.” And with that, Cassius marched up the stairs like he hadn’t just abused his only son. He was far beyond saving, Keefe realized. Nothing could change him now.

Even after his father walked away, Keefe sat on the ground in the exact same spot, panting and gulping for air. His back hurt, his arm hurt, his cheek hurt – hell, everything hurt. 

But most of all, his heart. It already had a few cracks in it, but now, Keefe felt like someone had ripped it out of his chest. He felt like it was being smashed into shards recklessly until it was so broken no one could ever put it together again. 

Its shattering was the loudest quiet he had ever heard.

[forbidden-sin-bin]

Heyyy Bestieeeee!!!

I’m loving By Your Side so farrrrr. Its just soo goood. The writing its just fab, the pacing perfect imo, and the description of y/n is so realistic and easily likeable - like we get to see her insecurities and flaws, what personally troubles her, as well as her hopes and dreams, the people she feels close (and their relationship feels credible!) etc…

Its just so well written that I can see myself in her on many occasions, and connect my emotions with her. Idk, maybe I’m rambling a bit.

Anyways, as I’m currently hooked on this story, and can’t get it out of my head (I created a Spotify playlist for this 💀) I just wanted to ask, if you have an exact date of when you’ll post chapter 5?

Btw, heads up, I think you forgot to put the link of chapter 4 in the By Your Side masterlist, can’t see it there

Now - this is taking way too long, and I’ll just head out, Peace ✌🏻

Hold on a sec-

I waited too freaking long to reply to this I’m so sorry but this was so sweet and thoughtful I literally couldn’t stop tearing up every time I read this. I wanted to give a thought out response to this so if you’re seeing this thank you for waiting this was amazing to see in my inbox-

*SLAMS FISTS ON THE TABLE HOLLERING SCREAMING CRYING*

THANK YOUUUUUUU!!!!!! Oh my god. Holy shit. This. This made my month. I truly didn’t know how to respond so I kept on holding this off from immediately responding and freaking out/appreciating everything you wrote. Finally I got my thoughts together after two long weeks!

Also YOU HAVE A SPOTIFY PLAYLIST?!?!? SHARE PLEASE HOLY HECK THAT IS ONE OF THE BIGGEST COMPLIMENTS I COULD EVER RECEIVE AHSJDLAGUFFIISJSHCJSKND-

also speaking of which I gotta get that part 1 playlist updated lmao

Literally that first paragraph made me flatline I swear. I’m so freaking glad cause I was hellbent on making y/n realistic as a person whilst also having them make choices or have characteristics that are reasonable enough for most people to be able to relate to or picture themselves in! So I’m incredibly glad you like her, flaws and hopes and dreams and all!

I literally have so, SO MUCH more that I want to mention or say to add to the above but I keep on deleting and rewriting anything else I try to add cause it makes a lot more sense in short DM’s instead of full on sentences lol.

Second paragraph knocked me outta my body and no you’re not rambling at all! I was worried that the reader’s perspective wasn’t realistic or relatable so hearing that you’re able to connect with them made me feel a lot more comfortable, thank you so much!

When I started this series, I wanted to have a Reader self-insert fic that was in a way, a possibility of what life could’ve been if we had the chance! I know I absolutely had that feeling where I always said to myself: “MAN. I wish I was born earlier.” Not that I don’t appreciate my life right now! I’m certainly incredibly lucky to have a life where I get to meet so many amazing people like you and have the chance to write like this!

AND FOR THE RELEASE DATE OF CHAPTER 5: Oh man, I thought I could get it done mid-late June but assignments man. Goddamn assignments handed to me without warning. I don’t have an exact release date for chapter 5 and I’m incredibly sorry about that. I know you’re looking forward to it and I am as well! Once I know for sure and I’m confident enough to say that I’m ready to post it (I suffer from the perfectionist and the ADHD curse I’m so sorry), I’ll let everyone know beforehand! I promise.

But once again, thank you, thank you, THANK YOU! If I had another reason to keep going and keep pushing myself to keep the series going I know that you and everyone that’s waiting and supporting are many, many reasons. And that’s more than enough to make sure I bring you the best possible fanfic to you all!

Much love,

- Sin Bin

[sirowsky]

Chapter 13 - A Lonesome Duo

Description: Din has managed to leave Pagwu, taking you with him, which presents a number of challenges. All of which is made even more difficult by the fact that he's not exactly the same man he was before meeting you. Something he himself is struggling to come to terms with. (Dual perspectives)

Author's Note: This chapter ties in a bit more with canon events, but also solidifies this story as an Alternate Universe series.

OBSERVE! Creator chooses NOT to include warnings on this series. Read at your own risk! Be aware that this story will include violence and is not suitable for minors! 18+ONLY.

Word Count: 4550 Masterlist (This Story) Author’s Masterlist

Link to Chapter 14

–=¤=–=¤=–=¤=–=¤=–=¤=–=¤=–

   (One year later)

   It’s been a long time since he last visited Tatooine. Not since before he lost the kid. And showing up without him now is sure to make Peli Motto disappointed.    He does travel with a different companion these days, but he doubts that seeing you would ever put a smile on the mechanic’s face.

   “Stay on the ship, okay?” he says over his shoulder, knowing you’re there even though he can’t see or hear you.

   The cockpit is too small for you, but this is a cargo vessel, so the hold fills up most of the ship’s body, from the cockpit to the loading ramp at the back. He chose it specifically because it’s big enough for you to move around in, without being too big or cumbersome to manoeuvre.    He hears a short hiss of hot air behind him and knows what it means.

   “Don’t worry, I’ll be fine. Peli’s a friend,” he tries to reassure you, but you’re apparently not in the mood.

   He hears the tips of your tails scrape against the floor, indicating that you’re agitated, just as he begins to land the ship.

   “I’m sorry, but if she sees you, we’re gonna have a problem. I’ll leave the ramp open so you can easily reach me if something happens, but I need you to stay hidden unless you absolutely can’t.”

   He touches down, hearing nothing more from you, so once everything is switched off, he leaves the small cabin and goes to find you in the hold, to make sure that you’re calm before he disembarks.    But you’re stealthier than one might think, for a creature of your size and the fact that your chest glows. He can’t see you back there.

   The body of the ship has an automated loading system with several mechanical arms and different attachments, all of whom hang from the ceiling and provide good cover.

   “Pan?” he tries, hoping that you’ll at least let him know where you are, even if you don’t come out, but it seems that you’ve decided to take the staying-out-of-sight-thing literally.

   It’s not so much the hiding that annoys you, you do that voluntarily around humans most of the time, since instinct still tells you to. What annoys you is not knowing where Din goes or what trouble he might get himself into.    And there is cause behind your concerns, as there have been one or two incidents in the past few months when he’s been in trouble.

   “Okay,” he finally sighs, “I won’t be long.”

   He lowers the loading bay ramp and finds Peli standing out there with her arms crossed and her signature scowl in place, ready to tell whatever pilot disembarks, exactly how they’ve failed to maintain their ship.    But that scowl becomes a surprised smile when she sees who it is.

   “Mando! Thought you might’ve got eaten by another krayt dragon. How the heck are ya?”

   “Hey, Peli. I’m happy if I never have to see another dragon.”

   “Aren’t we all. Now, where are you hiding the greenie?” she asks, looking all excited. “I’ve been dying to see that little womp-rat, where’s he at?”

   “He’s… not with me anymore.”

   “Whatcha mean? He ain’t… gone… is he?” she struggles to keep the emotions out of her voice, trying not to reveal how much she likes the kid, but Din gently shakes his head.

   “No, he’s with someone that can help him better than I can,” he reassures her, and she gasps a sigh of relief.

   “Oh, good stars above, don’t scare me like that, dummy!” she admonishes, and then seems to remember that she’s not supposed to care so much, and clears her throat before turning her attention to the ship. “Anyway, uh, whatcha doing with this hunk o’ cargo-scrap? Thought you would’ve gone for something… faster.”

   “It’s fast enough,” he says with a small smile, and she can hear it.

   “Let me guess. You’ve modified the engine, thrown out the non-essential mechanics to lighten the ship, and fixed that imbalance problem at the back that all these older models had?”

   “I may have fiddled with the engine,” he admits, “but the rest is original.”

   “No way! This thing is a tired old piece of junk in its original state, you’d be downright stupid to buy this without modifying it. And I know you ain’t stupid, Mando.”

   He has to chuckle at that, because as always, she’s right about the ship. But she also doesn’t know why it fits him so well, and it’s not like he can just tell her either.

   “It suits me just fine for now,” is all he tells her, making her cross her arms on front of her chest while she weighs his words, clearly sensing that he’s keeping something from her, and trying to decide if it’s worth pushing him for answers.

   “If you say so,” she finally huffs with a shrug, apparently deciding that perhaps his secrets are best not to know. “But I’d best give it onceover for ya.”

   “Thanks. I won’t be very long, I just need to restock some supplies,” he says as he starts to leave the hangar, but then turns back. “Uh… you should probably stay away from the hold.”

   Just about to put her droids to work, Peli’s head whips back towards him with a suspicious glare in her eyes.

   “Why? You got something other than mechanical arms in there?”

   “Just steer clear,” he warns, but with a tone that conveys concern rather than harshness. The less curious she is, the better.

   He hears her mutter something about creeping her out when he once again turns to leave, hoping that both of you will listen to him and do as he say. But he’s far from confident that either of you will.

<><><><><><><> 

   You remember things better now. Your names are like anchors, grounding you to yourself and keeping you connected to your past, and that helps you to add new memories as well.    But most of all, it’s being around the hunter that helps you. His presence is like a shielding blanket around your being, making sure that everything important is always close to you.

   You still don’t remember your human life, but you don’t need to. He’s told you everything that he knows, which is enough for you to be aware of everything that matters.    But somehow you doubt that he knows that the most significant thing of all, is him. He matters more than anything ever has, which is why you hate when he leaves.    He has to sometimes, you understand that, but you still don’t like it.

   It has led to some bad situations in the past, this overprotectiveness of yours, but you can’t really help it.    Being separated from him for too long makes your brain falter and begin to lose track of things. So, whether it’s fear of losing him or your own mind, is anyone’s guess, but you can’t let him stray too far.

   And not just for selfish reasons, either. If you were to forget, you’re certain that you’d revert back to the beast that is led entirely by age-old instincts, with no telling if Din or anyone else would be able to bring you back. And if that happened, it wouldn’t matter if you were in the middle of a war or among peaceful individuals.    You would likely kill anyone around you, out of fear or just confusion.

   You watch him leave from your hiding spot among the tubing and exposed wiring of the loading machine, high under the ceiling, and you hear him warn the woman to stay out of the ship, which she does.      But her droids don’t.    It’s just maintenance, you know that they pose no threat at all. But you still want to chase them out.

   Not because of any danger you perceive from them, but just because it feels invasive.    This ship is effectively your home. Yours and the Mandalorian’s. It’s the one place where you can be yourself and rarely ever have to hide, since he’s the only one that doesn’t fear you. Which is why anyone else setting foot there becomes a trespass against your fragile sense of peace.

   Still, you manage to hold yourself back, letting them work undisturbed for the short time it takes them to go over the ship and take care of any little hiccups they find.    But when darkness falls, you realize that it’s taken too long for Din to come back.    Worry flares in your chest, stoking the flames until the entire cargo hold is glowing red, attracting the attention of the mechanic.

   “What in the laser blaster…?” she mumbles as she approaches the ramp, trying to peek inside to look for the source of the light.

   She doesn’t heed Mando’s warning anymore, drawn up onto the sloping surface by curiosity, while the droids hide behind crates outside.    And your sense of violation suddenly escalates, turning into a deep desire to show this disrespectful human what happens when she doesn’t listen.

   Fire churns in your chest, turning the limited space unreasonably hot, which is enough to make her back out again, but you’re still not satisfied.    When you shift position, climbing down the wall out of sight of the woman, the hull creaks and sways as your weight moves around, and the light obviously follows.

   You can hear the human scramble away as she realizes that there’s something alive in the ship, stumbling over some tools as she tries to hide.    Her temperature is a lot higher than the cooling desert, so you know exactly where she is, but she’s not the one that you want to find.

   You don’t really care if anyone sees you, but Din has made it clear that you should avoid being sighted whenever possible, to keep panic to a minimum. So, even though all you want is to run out and find him, you remain on the ship. But you stay close to the ramp, so that you can make a hasty departure if needed.

   The memory of the last time you lost your patience while waiting for him, is still crisp in your mind. And probably in the minds of the six Kitonaks that you unintentionally scared half to death, as well.    But really, how were you supposed to know that they are just incredibly slow-moving and impossible to rush? It’s not like you’ve spent much time studying other cultures.

   And the time before that, when Din was visiting his teacher or spiritual guide or something, on Glavis Ringworld, you couldn’t be blamed for having barged in after him, when she’d hidden him from you for a full day. It had taken you hours to locate him.    To her credit, though, she hadn’t reacted as violently as you would’ve thought a Mandalorian teacher might. Especially to one of your kind.

   --The ship was parked in one of the ports while Din took care of a bounty, after which he was going to find the Armourer. He didn’t tell you anything about her, or where she might be, only that you had to stay on the ship, and then he left and didn’t come back.    No one noticed as you snuck off the spacecraft, and you made sure to stay in the shadows while you searched for him, but the air wasn’t natural, and so full of strange new scents that you couldn’t detect any trace of him.

   It was pure luck that finally saw you come across the smell of beskar, but even after you’d caught the trail, it evaded you several times. Passing directly underneath the ventilation or exhaust pipes of factories or ships ports, where the air was continuously pumped full of chemicals and other particles, the scent was very effectively obliterated.    All of which slowed you down, agitating you to no end, but didn’t stop you.

   And when you finally found him, battling against one of his own, that agitation graduated into rage.    You charged his opponent, fully intending to separate him from his limbs, but Din saw you at the last second and was able to step in between.

   “No, Pan, he’s a friend!” he shouted at you, while throwing his arms out to make himself bigger, to force your focus back on him.

   The two other Mandalorians backed away at first, clearly rattled, but the woman drew closer again once she realized that you listened to Din.

   “A Pagwian demon,” she stated simply, as if your appearance was no more remarkable than that of another human. “They are believed to be extinct, largely by the hands of our kin, no less. How have you managed to tame such a creature?”

   “She’s not tamed, she’s my friend too,” he told her, before turning back to you, still hissing and spreading heat around you, unable to calm yourself after so many hours alone and searching. “I’m sorry I was gone for so long, but everything’s alright.”

   “This beast… trusts you?” the woman asked, finally sounding affected by what she was seeing, and Din nodded, keeping his eyes on you.

   “Much of what we thought we knew about their kind is false. Pan has showed me their side of our shared history and made me a part of it. I am as much one of them now, as I am one of you.”

   “How do you mean?” she asked, and he finally turned away from you, to face her.

   Without saying anything, he raised his arms in front of his body, and then quickly crossed them, beating the metal of the vambraces on his lower arms together, creating a spark.    It jumped from the metal to his clothes, just as he allowed his temperature to skyrocket, turning that spark into a flame that in no time at all had spread to cover his entire upper body.

   Fully ablaze and completely unbothered by the heat, he stood there to await their judgement, not knowing how they would take it, if they’d even consider him one of them anymore.    He told you a few days later, that he’d been truly frightened in that moment. Of being abandoned by the only people he could remember belonging with.

   “Their flame lives inside you,” the woman concluded. “How was this achieved?”

   Din allowed the fire to die out before he answered, leaving a few slowly trailing vines of smoke snaking off his shoulders and head.

   “Painfully.”

   “You have undergone the Burn?” she asked, now with a hint of suspicion in her tone, which made you want to rip her throat out.

   “Yes and no. I’m still human, so obviously the flame didn’t fully change me. But I have been profoundly altered, there’s no denying that,” he explained, and then the other man, Paz Vizsla, took a step forward.

   “Then you are nothing,” he growled, clearly not happy with this turn of events.

   “This is true,” the Armourer concurred, making your temperature rise in anger. “Whether half or fully burned, Din Djarin has been undone. But he has also been forged into something new. As all things are when fire grips them.”

   “He can no longer be allowed to belong to the covert,” Vizsla spat behind his helmet. “Demons have no place among Mandalorians.”

   “History would agree with you, hunter. But history was never presented with these circumstances,” she calmly pondered, and you found yourself cooling down a bit.

   “You cannot be considering such an abomination in our ranks…” Paz all but hissed at her, but she seemed unmovable in her opinions.

   “It is not for me or you to decide, Paz Vizsla. There is no discrimination among us. A Mandalorian may be of any species, so long as they swear to uphold the Creed and follow the way.    To my knowledge, Din Djarin has not strayed from the path, and for that reason, he cannot be expelled.”

   “But I have,” Din suddenly confessed, silencing them both. “I have removed my helmet. Both for the sake of the child, Grogu, and among the outcasts of Pagwu. I have broken the creed.”

   They both stared at him for a moment, and then the Armourer took a step forward.

   “Then, you are a Mandalorian no more.”--

   For some reason, hearing that had hurt you, even before you understood how much they matter to him.    He matters to you, his happiness matters to you, and especially after learning how important the Mandalorian family he grew up with is to him, it was painful to see the moment that he lost them.

   Before you and Din left, the Armourer had spoken of a way that he could redeem himself, but Din has still not decided if that’s a path he’s prepared to walk.    He doesn’t talk about it, but you can see how the conflict eats at him. How he struggles to decide between trying to remain what the Tribe made him, to turn back to the creed, or accept that he is now something different, and allow that to guide him instead.

   Sometimes, the pain that this causes him makes you wish that he had never come to Pagwu. Perhaps then, you would’ve remained human and all the people in Ig’wu would’ve lived.    The truth would never have been known, but in some ways that might have been just as well. Not much good seems to have come from these events.

   You are glad that you can’t remember the people you knew there, or your life among them, because that would make the knowledge that you killed them all, entirely unbearable. But you are also grateful for how well you can recall most of what’s happened since then, because otherwise it would all have been somewhat pointless.

   That’s still fully dependent on your connection with the Mando, though, which is why you’re starting to get antsy.    He knows that he can’t stay away for too long, or you’ll come looking for him, but despite your anxiousness, you do agree with him about keeping you out of sight. No good ever comes from people seeing you.

   Which is why you bide your time, holding back the fears that he won’t return, keeping your mind from spinning together stories about how he’s been captured, and someone is trying to steal his armour or weapons.    Those are generally the types of scenarios you come up with, and the worse your fear gets, the more gruesome the details become.

   Then, mercifully, you finally hear his footsteps against the sand, coming closer, and you can relax. Because there’s no limp in his gait, nothing at all that gives you reason to think that anything bad might’ve happened.    You carefully climb back up among the machinery, not to hide from him, but just in case anyone else follows him up the ramp.

<><><><><><><> 

   “What in the Fuzzy Tauntaun do you have in there!?” Peli all but screams at him as he walks back into the hangar, carrying a heavily laden backpack of supplies.

   Unsure of how much she’s seen or heard, he’s hesitant to offer any reply, but he also knows that she’ll keep going when she’s this upset about something, and he isn’t wrong.

   “I know, you told me not to go in there, and I didn’t,” she tries to calm herself so she can explain, but it quickly twists back into frenzy again. “But something moved in there, Mando! Something big and heavy and creepy and it wanted to eat me! I could tell!”

   He’s relieved to hear that she clearly hasn’t seen you, but he doesn’t quite know how to talk his way out of this, so he just walks up the ramp and puts the backpack down. He takes a quick look around, but he still can’t see you, so he walks back out to Peli.

   “I know you’ve got something in there, so don’t even try and tell me I’m making it up. You told me yourself to steer clear, was that just to mess with me, huh?” she presses, and he sighs.

   “Honestly… the less you know, the better.”

   “Pfft. Coward,” she throws at him, but it’s a half-hearted insult, at best.

   “How’s the ship?” he asks, trying to change the subject.

   “Tiptop, surprisingly. She’s old but she’s reliable, I’ll give you that. Couldn’t find much wrong with her,” she says almost nonchalantly, before coming back to her annoyance. “Although I did sort of stop looking once that thing came at me.”

   “I’m sorry, Peli,” he offers sincerely, and she grumbles under her breath, clearly wanting to wring some answers from him, but feeling unable to when he’s being apologetic.

   “Oh, never mind. Just make sure you take the damned thing with you when you dust off, I don’t wanna find any nasty surprises lurking about in here.”

   “You won’t, I promise,” he says as she starts walking back to her office with the droids in tow, already barking orders at them to get back to work.

   “See you around, tin man,” she shouts after he’s already started walking up the ramp, but when he turns to say goodbye, she’s nowhere to be seen.

   So, he gets back in the ship and closes the rear hatch, but it isn’t until he has the coordinates locked in and punches in the hyperdrive that he hears you climb down from your hiding spot.

   “I was gone for too long, I know,” he starts while he makes sure that everything is operating normally, wanting to tell you that he knows that you’ve been worried.

   “I tried to be quick, but merchants like to haggle, and I didn’t have enough credits to-…” just as he walks through the door out into the hold, he’s cut off by the sudden and unexpected headbutt you give him against his chest-plate.

   Except, it isn’t a headbutt. It takes him a few seconds to understand why you just stand there, with your forehead pressed against the metal, but once it sinks in, the heat around his heart intensifies.    He slowly wraps his arms around your head, almost as big as his entire torso, accepting the hug you’re offering, and giving you the comfort that you’re apparently seeking.

   You’ve never done anything like this before. Seeking contact, yes, but never in such an intimate manner.    When you pull away after a minute, your glowing eyes meet his and he feels certain that you’re asking him something, but he can’t work out what it might be.

   “This would be so much easier if you could talk,” he says, and you cock your head to the side with what feels like sarcasm. “Okay, never mind.”

   He goes to retrieve the backpack and starts to empty it onto a shelf, when he hears the distinct clang of one of your tail-ends tapping the floor.    And when he turns his head to find out what you’re up to, he freezes to the spot for a moment.    Because you’re talking.

   Using your tails, you’re creating a circle and a question mark. A rudimentary sign-language, which Din interprets as you asking where the two of you are going. Which planet?

   “Ossus,” he replies in a bit of a daze, wondering why the hell you haven’t tried this before, it would’ve helped in so many situations over the past year. “It’s where my… Where the kid is. The one I used to care for.”

   He doesn’t like to talk about that with you, because he knows that you can sense how deeply it affects him, and it makes him feel exposed and vulnerable.    But ever since he went to see the Armourer he’s been struggling with where to go from here, which future to commit to.    And the more he thinks about it, the more he keeps coming back to Grogu.

   It might just be that he needs closure. To see the kid and know that he really is doing okay, before he can move on. Or it might be that he wants to avoid moving on altogether and just go back to the good times he had with the little green guy.    He honestly doesn’t know.

   The past year has been so strange, nothing feels the same anymore, least of all Din himself, and he yearns for something familiar and comforting.    And having lost his covert, the kid is pretty much he all he has left of his previous life.    Their clan of two.

   He has something similar with you now, and he does feel better knowing that he isn’t in this alone, despite everything. But Grogu is a piece of his history. Perhaps the most significant piece.    And maybe, if the child still looks at him the same way, still cares about him, even now that everything about him has changed, perhaps Din can begin to accept himself too.

   He could tell you all of this, he knows that you, perhaps more than anyone else, would understand, because what he seeks from his past, you seek from him.    He is your only comfort, your only friend, ally, family or familiar. Your only connection to a universe that hates you. You would absolutely understand his self-doubt and fear of the future.

   But that wouldn’t help either of you to move on. If anything, he feels like it would just be moving backwards.    Still, it somehow feels cruel to keep it from you, given that he knows practically everything about you.    He sighs heavily before sitting down on the floor, leaned against the wall while he looks at you, trying to decide if he’s up for this.

   “Would you… like to hear about him?” he asks, feeling unsettled even by the idea of opening up to you like this.

   It shouldn’t be so unnerving, he trusts you with his life, a little story shouldn’t be this hard to share.    But deep down, he knows that it isn’t about anything other than the fear of conflict. Of opening this door, this precious door that the kid broke down the very first moment that they met, only to find that you don’t care.

   He can’t quite see it, but that is what scares him. The idea that you might not love the child like he does, that you might not wanna protect him, that he won’t matter to you the way that Din needs him to matter to you.    Because right now, each of you is all the other one has, so if a conflict were to separate you, you would both be completely alone.

   Aside from the fact that you might turn into a mindless beast again, with the potential to destroy half the galaxy, he would feel terribly guilty if his selfishness turned out to be the cause behind you losing everything.    You don’t even have a fucking species to turn to.    And it’s not like you chose this any more than he did.

   Laying down in front of him, you let your tails rest over your back and settle yourself in, clearly waiting for him to start talking, so your answer is yes. You want to hear about Grogu.    Swallowing against the trepidation that is stocking up his throat, he leans his head against the wall as he goes back to that bounty. That first time he opened the egg, and a little green hand reached for him.

–=¤=–=¤=–=¤=–=¤=–=¤=–=¤=–

Link to Chapter 14

Thank you for reading and if you enjoyed this, please consider reblogging, I’d greatly appreciate it <3

@idreamofboobear @tanzthompson @winter-fox-queen @tiffanyleen @shsoba05 @toomanystoriessolittletime @nolanell @myfavpedrothings @harriedandharassed @bruxasolta @tintinn16 @pedrostories @littlemisspascal @sjdraws-00 @gallowsjoker @spishsstuff @little-mrs-morales @bilibiche @gallowsjoker @insomniamamma @thelion-sroar @brunette-overalls

[percervall]

Pumpkin spice lattes

Player: Jan Oblak Words: 1221 Requested: - Warnings: Mentions of injuries A/N: Jan seemed like the kind of person who'd secretly enjoy a PSL 🤷‍♀️ Let me know what you think!

Autumn masterlist

Click here if you'd like to be added to the taglist

------------

“Hey,” she said, peering around the doorframe, “ready?”

Jan turned around and groaned when he saw it was her, making her grin. 

“Come on, you know you’ll feel better afterwards.” 

Jan rolled his eyes at that.

“She’s right, it’s important to build up strength through low impact exercise,” his physical therapist said.

“Not you too,” Jan groaned.

“Come on sunshine, I’ll buy you a coffee.” 

The prospect of something that tasted better than the stuff they offered in the dining hall finally swayed him. Jan sighed and got up from the massage table. 

“Fine,” he grumbled, following her out of the training facility. It was a hell of his own making, if he was being honest. They had met during an Atletico press day a few years ago. She had played as a goalkeeper for the women’s team, so they ended up chatting about the differences between the men’s and women’s leagues, and swapped stories about their favourite saves. Long story short, they became best friends. And then she suffered a career ending injury. Jan came to see her every day while she was still in hospital. When she got out, Atletico offered her a job on the social media side of things. During the first six months, he would come by her office and drag her along for walks while her shoulder was still healing, and later he’d drag her along to the gym for workouts. And now she was returning the favour while he was recovering from a ligament injury in his ankle. 

“You get to pick, 1k or 2k?” she asked, referring to the distance. Jan knew he should go for the longer distance, but that involved stairs which he wasn’t looking forward to after today’s session in PT.

“1k, my ankle already took a beating thanks to Óscar.” She chuckled and linked her arm with his.

“Alright, 1k it is then.” 

Jan was grateful to be able to sit down once they got to the café they both loved. His ankle wasn’t hurting per se, but it had started to throb. He let himself fall on the bench with a groan.

“Same as always?” she asked. Jan nodded as he tried to breath through the pain. He turned sideways so he could rest his leg on the bench as well, and the elevation eased some of the pain. Jan enjoyed the sunshine for a while, closing his eyes and tilting his face up. He noticed her leaving the café, pretty much dancing towards him. 

“An Americano for the grump and a PSL for me!”

“A PS-.. What’s a PSL?” Jan asked as he took his coffee from her. He pointedly ignored her calling him a grump. It was one of her nicknames for him and he begrudgingly accepted that. To be fair, he was grumpy. The rehab was taking longer than he’d like and it was wearing him down. She lifted his injured leg and sat down, resting his foot in her lap. 

“Only a gift from the coffee gods; Pumpkin spice latte. I was hoping they’d have them. These are my fave this time of year,” she beamed at him. 

“Can’t say I’ve ever had one,” Jan said, taking a sip from his own coffee. She gasped, turning to look at him with wide eyes. 

“Jan Oblak, you my friend have not truly lived. Here,” she said, handing him her cup. He looked at her, not fully trusting she wasn’t pulling his leg, and took a tempative sip.

“Jesus,” he muttered. She laughed and took the cup back.

“That’s diabetes in liquid form!” Jan said incredulously. 

“I know,” she said, eyes twinkling with mirth, “isn’t it the best?” 

He threw her a look, eyebrows raised as if to say are you kidding me? which only made her laugh again, head thrown back. Jan shook his head and took another sip of his black coffee to rinse out the overly sweet drink. 

“I don’t always get them, but I came to realise life’s too short to only drink boring coffee,” she said, shrugging one shoulder and taking another sip of her latte. They were quiet for a moment while he mulled that over in his head. If he was honest with himself, Jan had to admit that she was right; life was too short to only do the things you had to do and not do the things you loved. 

“Could I try another sip, now that I know to expect pure sugar?” Jas asked. She chuckled and handed him the cup. Jan took another sip, picking up on the different spices this time. Yes, it was still sweet, but it was.. Nice. The spices were very autumnal. He could see the appeal.

“Not bad. Still prefer something that won’t decrease my lifespan with each sip, but I can see why you like them,” he admitted. 

“I’ll make a PSL-lover out of you yet, just you wait,” she said with a grin, taking her coffee back from him.

“The club nutritionist will love you for sure,” he said sarcastically.

“They don’t have to know I’m smuggling you PSLs. I ask for an extra pump of the pumpkin spice syrup, but they’re normally not this sweet. Make you a deal: if you can run 1k without pain on the treadmill, I’ll treat you to one.” She held out her hand. Jan thought for a moment. Maybe this was the kind of bribery he needed to get through physical therapy. 

“Deal,” he said, shaking her hand.

“How’s it going, sunshine?” she asked as she walked into the gym of the training facility. It had been five weeks since they made their deal and Jan had been working hard in PT to reach his goal. He grunted a response from his position on the floor. She waited for him to finish his reps before she spoke again.

“Heard you’re making vast improvements,” she said. Jan nodded, wiping the sweat from his brow.

“A little birdie told me you ran even more than 1k this morning,” she continued. Jan looked at her, eyebrows raised. He then threw a glare at his physical therapist. Óscar raised his hands.

“Don’t look at me, Oblak. Wasn’t me.” 

“Marcos told me,” she explained, “he and I go way back. But great job Jan! 1.3 kilometres, that’s huge!” Jan grumbled a reply, not looking at her. 

“Oi, if you keep up this act I’ll just have to give this to someone else. Maybe Marcos will appreciate it. Or Anto. That man loves his sugary drinks,” she said, pulling a to-go cup from behind her back. 

“Ah, now it all makes sense,” Óscar said with a laugh. Jan slumped his shoulders.

“I’m sorry for snapping at you. It’s been… It’s been a week,” Jan said. 

“I know. Here,” she said gently, holding the cup out to him. Jan took it from her, wrapping his hands around it.

“Thank you,” he muttered, taking a temptative sip. Jan would be lying if he said he hadn’t been looking forward to this. After she had introduced him to the PSL as she called it, he’d gone back a couple of times to get one himself with less of the syrup. He absolutely loved them now. 

“You’re welcome. Told you I’d convert you to a PSL-lover,” she said, grinning wide. 

[dorianwritesthings]

The Bad Batch x Reader Senate Party Intro

A/N: Hey so @rainydaydream-gal18 does this super cool thing where they do like, choose your own ending stories for the Bad Batch! I think they are super freaking cute and I’ve decided to try my hand at it. If you haven’t already go check out their stuff. Here is a link to their masterlist.

Also check out @nahoney22 ! Her Crosshair x Reader fic, “A Night to Remember”, was a big inspiration for this. It follows you and Crosshair going to a party to get information (he also buys you a dress!). It is very cute and I love it and I loved that scenario so here this thing is!

__________________________________________

Reader Pronouns Used: She/Her in the endings.

Summary: Reader picks out a fancy dress and gets glammed up to infiltrate a big important party with the Bad Batch. 

___________________________________________

“Aren’t you excited?” Omega asked. The two of you were walking through rows of dresses in preparation for an important assignment. You ran your hand along some of the soft fabric and sighed.

“I guess?” You said, “I’m just…It’s been a while since I’ve done something like this.”

“Well, if it makes you feel better, I’ve never done something like this.” 

You smiled at the reassurance and gestured to a rack of dresses. 

“These will all be about your size,” You said, “Why don’t you pick some out and you can try them on? I’ll go look for something just over here.”

“Okay!” She skipped over to the rack without a second thought and you straightened up, hoping to emulate some of Omega’s enthusiasm.

The rest of the Batch came back to your side of the store. You’d left them to get their outfits properly fitted for tailoring. You and Omega were just bringing a few dresses to the changing rooms, having narrowed down what you wanted to try to 5 each. An accomplishment given the variety. You waved the boys down and sent Omega into the fitting room to try on her picks.

“Well, once you two are done we’re all ready.” Hunter said, “Thank you for helping us pick something out by the way. You’re the closest thing we have to an expert here.”

You almost cringed at the thought, but you’d been to a few important functions like this before, so he was technically right. Giving the boys direction to find suits that matched their preferences while still being stylish enough for the company of galactic senators had taken up the first half of your day. Omega was ever helpful, though she did gravitate toward louder pieces. She was a good influence on all of you during this experience.

“Strange that they’d insist on us being part of the party.” You said, “Plenty of armored guards come to these sorts of things.”

“Yes, but we are supposed to be at least a little discreet.” Tech said, “As to heighten the probability of gain-”

“Gaining vital information regarding the identity of a potential spy.” Echo finished, rolling his eyes, “I don’t think this-” he held up his scomp link- “is really what I’d call discreet.”

“Yeah, we kind of stand out in a crowd.” Wrecker chuckled. He was probably the most okay with the situation besides Omega, though he was upset about the discretion.

“Yes, well, unfortunately it is a bit short notice for that, Echo, though I assure you, there will be guests in attendance with extensive cybernetics. It will be fine. Looking the part is most of the battle with these things. It’s simple psychology.”

“Speaking of looking the part…” Crosshair nodded at the dresses in your hand.

“You and Omega found a few then?” Hunter asked. You nodded.

“She’s trying her first one on now.” 

You hung your picks on the rack outside the dressing room and took a seat. The others followed your lead. The shop was fairly small, so Wrecker and Echo decided to sit on the ground. Tech opted to stand while Crosshair and Hunter took the other available chairs.

To say your group looked out of place in the shop would be an understatement. Your armor alone made you stand out against the bright colors and soft fabrics. 

“You can let me know if you need help, Omega.” You called, “Some of these can be pretty annoying to lace up.”

“I think I got it!” She called back. Soon after you heard the changing room door click and Omega appeared.

Her first pick was a soft yet vibrant pink color. The A-line skirt stopped just above her ankles and the sleeves gathered up into ruffles at the shoulders, stopping around her elbows.

She waved at you all and it dawned on you that maybe she wasn’t as confident as she was letting on. Her smile looked slightly nervous. This was an entirely new experience for her, too.

“It looks…nice.” Hunter offered. You gave her an encouraging smile. It did look very cute.

“Is it comfortable?” Echo asked.

“I…think so?” she turned a bit, getting a look at herself in the mirror. Her eyes brightened.

Tech tilted his head, “What about practical?”

“The skirt is good, you’ll be able to move your legs freely without tripping.” You said, approaching her to inspect the fabric a bit closer, “Try moving your arms.”

She did so, and you saw the fabric bite into her shoulder slightly. She couldn’t put her arms all the way in front of her, but you held your tongue, not wanting to be too critical of the first dress she’d picked out.

Omega looked at it for a moment longer then said, finally, “Not this one. It wasn’t really my favorite anyway.”

“Alright, next dress then.” You smiled, opening the door to the changing room for her. She walked back in and you took your seat again.

“How many dresses did she pick out?” Hunter asked. Your smile turned quickly into a smirk.

“A few.” You said. “And we will be patient for all of them.”

You shot the boys around you a look. They all understood what you meant. Omega had been nothing but patient and encouraging as they hunted for formal wear. It was their turn to return the favor.

You sighed in relief, then decided to give an actual answer, “She actually ended up taking in 5.”

“Surprising.” Hunter looked back at the changing room.

Wrecker chuckled again from his seat in front of you, “I would have thought she’d try on the whole store!”

“Well maybe you tired her out.” You gave Wrecker a gentle shove. The door clicked again, catching all of your attention.

After trying them all on Omega made a decision.

Omega ended up going with her 3rd dress: a deep blue one with small rhinestones falling down the skirt which stopped a little below the knee. This skirt was quite a bit more voluminous than her first choice. The bodice still had sleeves, but the fabric was loose enough to allow her a full range of motion.

You were pleased with her choice and more than proud of how she pointed out the practical advantages of it to you alongside how much she liked certain aspects of it. The rhinestone pattern and sparkles looked almost like falling stars while the skirt would be a good hiding place for a blaster and a vibroblade.

“Alright, you’re turn!” Wrecker cheered, pushing you into the dressing room. You’d nearly forgotten about yourself.

“Hey! I need the dresses first, Wrecker!” You tried to push back against him but it was no use. Fortunately, you spotted Crosshair behind him holding your dresses. He passed them to you.

“Thank you!” You smiled, taking them from him and shutting the door quickly.

For the first time since you’d arrived at this shop, you finally had a moment alone. You took a deep breath, steadying yourself against the tiredness in your bones, then hung each of your dresses out before you.

You were most excited to try on….

The Dress With The Large Skirt (Wrecker) 

The Elegantly Simple One (Echo)

The One With The Softest Material (Hunter)

The Dress Made With An Interesting Fabric (Tech)

The One With A Slit Up the Side (Crosshair)

[cjsinkythoughts]

The Conversation

Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Avenger!Reader

Word Count: 7661 (Don’t come at me - you guys asked for it)

Warnings: !FATWS Spoilers!, Cursing, Fluff, Feelings, I Dunno What Else, This One’s Pretty Chill, Except The Ending, But You’ll See When You Get There

A/N: Here it is! I was hesitant about posting it because that means we’re getting closer to the end and I’m such a nostalgic bitch! I’m definitely gonna cry next week when the last episode comes out! Anyways, I’ve got a few things to talk about:

I think this is one of the most important chapters I’ve written and I’m excited to see your reactions to it. It is longer, but you guys asked for that, so you got it! Also, I’m loving the Asks, Comments, and Reblogs. I try to respond to all of them. I have work in a little bit, so I won’t be able to until after, but I’ll get back to you as soon as I can. Ask me anything; about my series, the show, any of the movies, personal stuff, I really don’t care. If you’re not comfortable, that’s totally fine! Every like means so much to me!

I know it’s not the end yet - we’ve got one more episode and a list of One Shots to get through - but there’s a definite feeling of this series coming to an end, and I just want to thank you all for the support and love you’ve been giving it! I’ve really enjoyed writing these characters and this story! It’s very, very special to me and I’m glad I’ve been able to share it with you lovely people!

On that note, be kind to yourselves and others! Thank you again for reading! Excuse any mistakes - this isn’t beta’d! Enjoy and stay tuned!

FATWS Masterlist

cjsinkythoughts Masterlist

!SPOILERS UNDER CUT! (Sorry for the gifs I just love them so much and he’s so pretty and this part is technically two parts so...you get four!)

“Louisiana.” Bucky hummed, looking around the airport.

You rolled your eyes. “You’re not gonna find anything interesting about Louisiana in here, doofus. Let’s call an Uber.”

“An Ooper? What the hell is an Ooper?”

You giggled, shaking your head and grabbing his hand and pulling him towards the luggage carousel. “Uber. It’s like…a taxi service. But there’s an app on your phone to get a driver instead of waiting for one on the street.”

“Oh.” He blinked, tilting his head. “That’s…helpful.”

You laughed again, stopping in front of Carousel 3, where your flight from New York was assigned. You went back to New York to grab a bag with clean clothes and other necessities, along with taking a real shower for once. It was nice to be back in the States, as much as you loved traveling. It’d been a crazy few weeks and you were ready to just relax.

“Do you think there were any problems with Sammy’s present?”

Bucky shook his head. “Nah. Especially considering they know who we are.”

You snickered at his slight grumble. They had had…problems at the other two airports - first the one in Sokovia then JFK in New York - considering Bucky’s entire arm was metal. It’d taken a full hour before they actually let you go, and by that time they had to give you a new plane because yours had left.

“Seriously. Who else has a fucking metal arm and has 1917 listed as their birth year on their Driver’s License?” You giggled again. That was also true. They thought he was messing with them. It wasn’t until you stepped in a few minutes after they asked Bucky to step to the side, seeing Bucky get frustrated, that they realized Bucky wasn’t pulling their legs.

“Well, we’re here now and that’s all that matters.”

He nodded in agreement, watching for your bags, his hand finding yours when he realized how many people there were. “Do you know where he lives? I didn’t even think about it.”

“Yeah, don’t worry. He invited me over once. I declined, but I saved the address.”

“He…invited you over?” Bucky frowned.

You gave him a look. “I’m sure he invited you, too. You just never checked his texts.”

He licked his lips, tilting his head. “Yeah, no, I know, but I mean…why didn’t you go? Weren’t you two just talking about how you wanted to meet his nephews the other day?”

“Yeah, but I had gotten a tip on Wanda at the time and I didn’t want to miss the chance that she was there. He told me it was fine. I still felt really bad. I could tell he was a bit disappointed. I think it was one of the boys’ birthdays. Or something. I don’t remember. Is that bad? Yeah, probably. I really should remember. Maybe I should keep track of birthdays on my calendar or something.”

“Doll.” You looked up to find him giving you a magnificent smile, teeth and all. “You’re rambling.”

“Oh. Am I? Sorry. I didn’t realize.”

He shook his head quickly, squeezing your hand. “Don’t apologize. It’s cute. I’m just not used to you talking so much. You kinda did on the phone sometimes.”

You shrugged, pushing down the heat crawling up your neck at his words. “I rambled a lot to Steve.”

“Oh.”

His face fell, making you scrunch your eyebrows up in confusion, nudging him slightly to grin at him. “It’s nice to have someone to ramble to again, though.” There was that smile again. You were stopped from saying anything more when you noticed some kids pointing and chattering excitedly at a gleaming silver box coming around the corner on the conveyor belt. “There it is.”

He looked over his shoulder, dropping your hand and stepping over to grab it, lifting it effortlessly. You didn’t know what was in it or how heavy it was, but you were sure it felt like a feather to him.

“Alright. Got our bag, sweetheart?” You lifted up the duffle in answer and he jerked his head towards the doors. “Let’s get outta here, then. Call that Booper or whatever.”

“U-B-E-R! Ub-er!” You threw your hands up, following him as he started walking towards the exit. “What’s so hard about it?!”

He just gave you a little smirk over his shoulder.

***************

Bucky kept asking the Uber driver questions about his job. The guy was super nice and patient the whole time, a thick southern accent lacing his answers. Southern hospitality was no joke and apparently had no limit as Bucky asked about his experiences, listening intently and telling him his own stories of taxi drivers in NYC.

When you got to Sam’s sister’s house, Bucky, being Bucky, tipped the driver half of what you paid for the ride, thanking him for his time and energy, before getting out.

“You’re so adorable, you know that?” You teased him as you stepped up the porch stairs and knocked on the door.

He rolled his eyes, a tint of pink dusting across his cheeks. “He was nice.”

You hummed at his defense, the smile never leaving your features. After a moment, Bucky raised his fist to knock again. “Jesus Christ! Don’t fucking knock their door down!” You grabbed his wrist and lowered it.

“Sorry. I forget sometimes.” Bucky informed you absentmindedly,  tilting his head to peek in the window. “I don’t think anyone’s home.”

“They’re probably at the docks, then.”

Bucky raised an eyebrow. “The docks?”

You nodded, gesturing for him to follow you. “Yeah. They have a boat, remember? He talked about it last week.”

“Oh right. The one he’s trying to convince his sister not to sell.”

“Yeah.” You confirmed. “I’m pretty sure it’s that way. I don’t know how far, but we can call the Uber back-”

Bucky scrunched up his face and shook his head. “Nah. I don’t wanna bother him again. We can walk.”

You gave him an incredulous look. “It’s literally his job to drive people around.”

“Well, yeah, but what if he’s got other people to drive?”

You lifted his metal knuckles to your lips. “Trust me, Buck, I’m sure he’d rather drive you than anyone else.”

“Thank you?”

Swinging your now linked hands, you gave a firm nod, letting him know it was, in fact, a compliment. “You are so very welcome.”

The walk was a lot longer than you thought it was, and you ended up on Bucky’s back after he kept complaining about how you “shouldn’t be walking this long” and you were “injured” and you “needed rest’”. You’re not sure how a shoulder wound affected your ability to walk, but you relented and let him carry you the rest of the way to stop his whining.

“You forget, you did pull your thigh.”

“That was, like, three weeks ago! Yeesh!”

You finally got to the docks, which were bustling with people. Bucky set you down and raised an eyebrow which you shrugged in reply to, before heading over to where you spotted Sam with a few other older men.

“How do we get it off the truck?” You heard Sam ask, pointing to a large boat engine part in the bed of a beaten up truck. Scoffing as Bucky lifted it up without breaking a sweat, you leaned against the truck. Bucky grunted and set it down, looking at Sam.

“You’re welcome.” What a punk. “Just dropping this off.” Bucky lifted the case and set it where the engine was previously, Sam coming to stand on the opposite side of the truck as you. “You can sign for it and I’ll go.” You snorted, shaking your head, making Bucky shove your shoulder - the uninjured one - playfully. “I called in a favor from the Wakandans.”

Sam looked at you curiously. You shrugged and shook your head. “Don’t look at me, Sammy. He wouldn’t tell me what it is. He’s all hushy hushy about it until you say so.”

Before Sam could reply, there was a squeak and hissing over at the boat where steam was coming from a few pipes.

“Sam!” You knew that was Sarah from pictures Sam showed you. You stayed up by the truck, pulling yourself onto the bed while Sam tried fixing the pipe, Bucky butting in to show him how to do it properly.

“Why didn’t you use the metal arm?”

You saw Bucky lift up said metallic limb. “Well…I don’t always think of it immediately. I’m-I’m right handed.” Letting out a laugh, Bucky turned around and scowled teasingly at you. “And what’re you laughing at?!”

“Nothing!”

“Well then get your ass over here!”

You rolled your eyes, hopping down from the truck as Bucky asked if Sam wanted help with the boat. You leaned against a wooden post, grinning when Sam looked at you.

“I don’t have any plans.”

Sam gave a small smile, jerking his head back. “Yeah.”

You jumped down onto the boat to follow him, looking over your shoulder and stopping with an amused eyebrow raised as Bucky introduced himself to Sarah. “I’m Bucky.”

“Ah…Sarah.”

“Sarah.” Bucky repeated her name, before walking towards you, a grin still on his lips.

“Careful, Barnes. That playboy Steve warned me about is coming out.” You nudged him with a smirk, ignoring the feeling of your stomach dropping.

He rolled his eyes, kissing your head as he passed you and Sam to go where Sam was gesturing. “Don’t worry, Y/N. You’re still my doll.”

Sam raised an eyebrow, falling into step besides you and lowering his voice. “Conversation?”

“Hasn’t happened.” You informed him through clenched teeth as he groaned.

Sam gave you a list of chores that needed to be done to clean up the boat, giving you a quick tour and letting you know where all the tools needed where. You set to work immediately.

Sanding down, replacing old parts, cleaning, polishing and painting over the things that didn’t need replacing. They didn’t let you do any heavy lifting because of your stupid shoulder, but you were still able to help.

Sam had turned on some music for you to listen to, so you danced around the boat while cleaning. Turning your head when you felt a pair of eyes on you, you smiled when Bucky snapped his head back down to the wood he was sanding down.

“Gonna dance, Barnes?”

He looked back over, shaking his head. “Nah. I’m good watching you.”

Rolling your eyes, you got back to work, continuing to bop to the music, fully aware that he was watching you now.

A little while later, you were repainting the edges of the boat orange, when you looked over and noticed Bucky playing around with a paint scraper…sitting right on the edge that you had just finished repainting a few minutes ago.

“Buck!”

He looked over, eyebrows raised. “Yeah?”

You bit your lip, trying to hold back your mischievous grin. Shaking your head, you waved dismissively. “Never mind!”

He gave you a confused sort of pout, before shrugging and continuing to fidget with the tool. It wasn’t until later when he got up to help Sam tear the metal plating off the edge that it came to light with Sam chuckling and raising an eyebrow.

“Sit in something there, Barnes?”

“What?”

Bucky craned his neck back, eyes widening when he saw the orange paint on his ass, contrasting with his jeans. You let out a cackle and he whipped towards you, pointing at you accusingly, although the small uptick of his lips let you know he wasn’t really mad.

“Y/N!”

“No, no, no!” You laughed, sprinting across the deck, shrieking when he grabbed your waist and spun you around. You gasped when he grabbed a paint brush and painted an orange stripe right down the front of your shirt. “James!”

“Justice, sweetheart.” He breathed in your ear with a chuckle.

You shook your head, wiggling out of his hold. “This is a nice shirt!”

“You should’ve thought about that before.” He smirked, crossing his arms. Your eyes caught sight of Sam behind him, who raised an eyebrow and the bucket of paint he was holding. You nodded with a little giggle, making Bucky’s eyes narrow. “What’s so funny over there, do - holy shit!

You guffawed as orange paint dripped down his head, Sam standing innocently behind him with the now empty bucket behind his back. “Samuel!”

“Oops?”

“I’m gonna kill you!”

“Try me old man!”

“Fuck!

“Doll!”

“Oh my God!”

Paint, orange and white since those were the only cans they had out, flew across the deck, paint brushes being used like fencing swords.

You found out too late that wet paint was a little bit slippery and you slid on a huge puddle, sending you, not onto the ground below, but over the side of the edge into the water. 

“Doll!”

“Cher, you good?!” 

The three of you looked at each other, stunned for a moment, before bursting into fits of laughter and you nodded. “I’m good!”

The boys helped you get back up onto the dock, Sarah appearing with towels she conjured up out of thin air. “Let’s get you into dry clothes. Do you have-?”

“We’ve got some. We got a bag.” You told her with a grin, facing the guys. “You two should clean up some, too. Sammy, you’ve got a little something right there.” You pointed to your cheek, his own having a giant white splotch from his temple to his jaw. “And Buck?” You sniggered, gesturing to the whole of him. “You’ve got a lotta something right there.” 

“Ha. Ha.” He looked down. His top was practically tiger print, drenched in orange with white here and there, and his ass still orange as well. His hair, which had been plastered to his forehead, was starting to dry now, and it only made you laugh some more thinking about what a pain it’d be to get it out. For him, at least.

“God. Can’t even have a relaxing day on the boat with you two.” Sam jested once you finished up and joined him and Bucky, who had just finished dumping out some water buckets. Bucky had changed his shirt and it looked like they tried wiping their faces, but Sam still had small lines of white down his face. “How ‘bout a couple of drinks? Surely you can’t ruin that too.”

“Ruin?” You gasped in mock offence. “Sammy! I just made the day more…interesting.”

Sam chuckled, ruffling Bucky’s hair, which still had orange streaks in it. “Let’s go get some beers.”

************

You chatted for a bit, mainly you and Sam with you asking how Sarah and the boys were while Bucky with your legs in his lap, just listening to you two and sipping at his bottle. You had his hand in your own lap, wiping it down with a rag due to the paint that got on it.

“You’re lucky this is vibranium, you know.” You commented off handedly. “If it was your other one, it’d definitely get stained.”

“And who’s fault is that?” Bucky shot back with a teasing grin.

“Sammy’s.”

Sam spluttered. “Wh-what?! You started it!” You laughed, shaking your head.

Falling into a comfortable silence with just the water and birds chirping as your soundtrack, you downed the rest of your drink, which Bucky took as finished. “Well,” you moved your legs to let him stand up. He leaned forwards to clink his bottle against Sam’s and you stood up and stretched. “Gotta catch our flight tomorrow. Get a hotel room for the night.” Sam gave you a look to which you rolled your eyes at as Bucky set down his bottle and grabbed his jacket. “Crash, you know?”

“So you’re just gonna set me up like that, huh?”

“Well I don’t wanna make it weird for your family.”

“Just stay here.” You laughed as Sam babbled on about how nice the people were here, grabbing the jacket Bucky handed to you. It was getting a bit chilly from the breeze on the water and the sun going down. Plus, that water was cold.

“But don’t flirt with my sister.”

You cackled at Bucky’s face, that turned serious, his head shaking. “No.”

“‘Cause if you do I’ll have Carlos cut you up and feed you to the fish.”

“Can’t hold back the dog, Wilson. It’s been stuck in a kennel too long.”

Bucky turned to you, grabbing your jaw and squishing your cheeks together. “You know what? You need to shush. You’ve been snippy all day.”

You just smiled as innocently as you could with your lips being held by his metal fingers. “You’re too fun to mess with.”

He pecked your nose. “As long as I’m the only one you’re messing with. I’ll be right back.” He let you go and spun around, maneuvering around the boat in a way only a trained assassin could do.

“Oh my God, please! Please just put me out of my fucking misery! You’re killing me, cher.”

“What?” You gaped at him.

“Don’t act innocent!” Sam huffed, giving you a pointed look. “If I have to watch you two make googly eyes at you one more fucking day with neither of you doing anything about it-”

You rolled your eyes. “Oh come on, Sammy-”

“Don’t ‘come on, Sammy’ me! And don’t come at me with that ‘he doesn’t like me back’ bullshit. If you think for a second that boy wouldn’t follow you to the depths of the fucking ocean, you’re blind as a bat, woman.”

You shrugged, pushing up the sleeves of Bucky’s too big jacket. “It just…hasn’t come up.”

He deadpanned, shaking his head and standing up. “That’s it. I’m done. You two are driving me insane. I’m gonna lock you in a room until you have the conversation that needs to be had the next time either of you does something stupid.”

“Yikes. That’s gonna be quick.” At his look, your smile dropped and you nodded. “Okay, okay. I’ll…I’ll bring it up later.”

“Tomorrow or nothing.”

“Sam-”

Sam tilted his head, brow creasing. “Is it still Steve? Is that what this is still about? Because he’s gone, and he’s been gone and you need to get over it-”

“No. It’s not…” You sighed. “It clicked the other day. When we were hanging out. Steve left and, yeah, I might always love him, but Bucky…God…I love Bucky, Sam.”

The man grinned proudly. “I’m glad to finally hear you admit it. So what’s the problem?”

“It’s still complicated, right? I mean…he’s his best friend and I’ve never dealt with stuff like this before and-”

Sam’s smile dropped and he groaned again. “Imma head out. I can’t take this. Dumbass and dumberass. I swear to God.” You sniggered a bit as he grumbled, walking towards the ramp to climb off the boat, just as Bucky reappeared.

“Hey-”

“Nope! Not right now, Barnes! I can’t handle it! I can’t!”

Bucky gave you a weird look. “What’d you do?”

You chuckled, shaking your head. “Nothing.”

“Well, c’mon, doll. Sarah said she’s gonna make gumbo for us, whatever that is.” He held out his hand as you walked over. 

“You’re such a city boy.” You teased lightly, taking his hand and letting him help you pull you onto the dock. You shoved the sleeves of his jackets up again since they slipped from the first time. “Let’s go get some dinner. I’m starving.”

******************

“We have the couch and a mattress we can pull out, I just have to make Sam get it from the attic-”

“That’s alright. The couch is fine.” Bucky waved dismissively while you nodded in agreement.

Sarah raised an eyebrow at you two. “For both of you?”

You blinked, exchanging a look with Bucky, before shrugging and turning back to her. “Yeah.”

“Don’t fight it, Sarah.” Sam peeked out from the hall. “They’ve got a weird relationship.” You stuck your tongue out at the man while Bucky rolled his eyes, dropping your duffle bag by the couch. “How mature, Y/N.” Sam mimicked your action.

“Uhm…okay. Let me set up the couch for you then.”

Once everything was set up, you and Bucky thanking her for dinner - delicious and you’d never seen Bucky smile so much, the boys having kept him highly entertained throughout the meal - and for letting you crash, Sam and Sarah headed to their rooms, the boys already having been tucked in for the night.

“Are you gonna sleep on the floor?” You asked quietly, sitting down on the couch and doing the things for your night routine you didn’t already do in the bathroom.

“I think I’ll be okay.” He sat besides you. “I’ve been doing fine the past week or so.”

You smiled at him. “That’s good. Alright.” You stood up and stretched. “Let me just make sure everything’s in the bag and ready-”

You yelped when his arm wrapped around your waist, pulling you into his chest, shifting down to lay against the couch’s arm. “Do it in the morning.” He yawned, looking up at you tiredly. “I wanna go to sleep.”

“Then go to sleep, Buck. I’ll be right back.” He shook his head, his hold tightening as he sunk deeper into the couch.

“No. I fall asleep better with you.”

You rolled your eyes but grinned, settling down with your legs between his, your chin resting on his sternum so you could still look at him. He beamed, but you could see the exhaustion settling in, and he grabbed the blanket Sarah left over the back of the couch and draped it across your back, over both of your legs, before his arms crossed snugly under the covers at the small of your back.

“Dinner was nice tonight. I haven’t had a meal cooked like that in ages.” You hummed.

He nodded in agreement. “I think that’s the first time I’ve sat around a table with a family since the 40′s.”

You raised an eyebrow. “Did you like it?”

“Yeah...kinda makes me wish I had my own.”

“Your own what?”

“Family.”

You bit your lip, shyly avoiding his gaze. “You’re my family, Buck.”

A light kiss was pressed to your forehead, his fingers bringing your gaze back to his. “There’s no one else I’d rather have.” The room lapsed into silence again, the clock ticking on the wall, the low sound of crickets outside.

“You have really pretty eyes.” You mumbled, tilting your head slightly as you studied them. They always held so much emotion in them, especially in contrast to when you first met him as Soldat. They matched the water you fell in, and you wouldn’t mind falling over and over into them.

“Yeah, well, you’re just really pretty inside and out, so I think you’ve got me beat, doll.” He whispered back.

“You know who else is pretty? Sarah.”

He nodded with a hum. “That’s true. But I meant what I said. You’ll always be my doll.”

“So you’re not gonna ask her out?”

He gave you a weird look as you traced his sharp jawline absentmindedly. “Nah, sweetheart. It’s just…some harmless flirting. Except on Sam’s part.”

You gave a soft huff of laughter. “Yeah…he’s gonna strangle you. It is nice to see you like that, though. Flirty. Relaxed. Happy.”

“You make me happy, sweetheart.” He hummed, nosing your temple. “The road trip helped. I’m learning everything from you. Maybe not the flirting, but the carefree part.”

You blinked at him, finger stopping for a moment as you thought. “Oh…”

You felt his fingers dance up your spine, making you shiver slightly. “What I would give to know what’s goin’ on inside that pretty lil’ head’a yours, doll.”

“I just think it’s funny you’re learning how to be carefree from me…when I just started learning how to do it myself.”

“Oh yeah?”

You nodded, your finger continuing its path down his jaw. “I think it started with the goats.”

“The goats?”

You nodded again, resting your cheek on his chest, watching your finger move up from his chin. Once you got to the end of his jaw, you lightly scratched his scruff. “In Wakanda. Our goats.” You weren’t looking at him, so you didn’t see the way he physically melted at your words, his eyes going soft, his lips turning up slightly.

“Our goats, huh?”

But your tired brain wasn’t really processing what he said, instead focusing on the features your finger was now tracing - over his lips, up his nose. “You’re pretty too, Buck. Did you know that? Inside and out.”

He craned his neck to kiss your forehead. “Go to sleep, cuddle bug.”

Nodding, you nuzzled into his chest, finger feeling over the bumps and indents on the dog tags resting near your head. You tried going to sleep, but you kept shifting, your mind not shutting off.

“Hey, sleepyhead, I’m trying to, you know, sleep.”

“Sorry.” You apologized meekly. “I just…I dunno. I can’t.”

“Are you comfortable?” He peeked open and eye to look at you questioningly. You nodded. “Is it too hot? We can take the blanket off. I know I’m a walking furnace-”

You shook your head. “No. I don’t know why. I just can’t sleep.”

He licked his lips thoughtfully, before cradling your head and guiding you back down to his chest. “Lay down, sweetheart. Relax.” He stroked your hair, moving his head down to rub circles in your back muscles, pressing down harder when he felt knots. 

You hummed, your eyes closing. “That feels good.”

“Shshsh. Just go to sleep.” His lips pressed against your head once more, lingering a bit longer than they usually do, as you felt yourself drift off. You cuddled his side, throwing a leg over his waist, before nodding off, only barely hearing his words. “Attagirl. There we are.”

******************

“Doll?” You felt a shift underneath you and groaned, your eyes barely cracking open. “Hey, sleepyhead…it’s okay. I’m just gonna slip out from under ya, alright? Gonna go help Sammy with somethin’.”

You raised an eyebrow, letting him move you against the cushions as he sat up on the edge of the couch. “Sammy?”

“Yeah.” He bent over and kissed your cheek. You stretched out your limbs, about to rub your eyes, when he stopped you, kissing the inside of your wrists. “No. Not you, doll. Go back to sleep.” 

“Bu’...’m gonna help.” You slurred out, looking at him with confused, squinty eyes.

He chuckled, shaking his head. “It’s okay. Rest. You can help when you wake up again. Okay?” You mumbled out an “okay”, bringing the covers up to your chin and snuggling deeper into the cushions. “There ya go, cuddle bug. Good girl.” There was another kiss, one to your temple this time, before you slipped back into unconsciousness.

******************

The next time you woke up was because of a clatter in the kitchen. You yawned and sat up, stretching, eyebrows furrowing when you realized Bucky wasn’t with you. It took you a moment to remember your conversation, which you half thought you dreamt.

“Boys!”

“Sorry!”

You chuckled at the shouts, rubbing your eyes. “I am so sorry!” Sarah apologized, looking over at you from the stove. Trying to make the boys breakfast before school. Do you want anything? Eggs? Cereal? Toast?”

“Uh, cereal’s fine.” You stretched out your back again, before throwing back the covers and standing up, a little shakily.

“You wouldn’t happen to know where Sam went, would you?”

You raised an eyebrow. “Uh, I think him and Bucky went to fix something on the boat. I don’t for sure, though.”

Sarah groaned. “He probably went to fix the stupid water pump which doens’t need fixing. Dumbass.”

You chuckled, padding over into the kitchen. “Yeah. I just work with him. I can’t imagine growing up with him.”

“Trust me; some days you want to throw him in a box and send him out to sea. Bowls are in that cupboard.”

You snickered, moving over to grab a bowl from the cupboard she pointed to. “That’s how I feel with Bucky. Sam is less often, but when those two get together…it’s a full zoo.”

She laughed at that, nodding as she got out the milk and a few boxes of cereal for you to choose from, handing you a spoon. “That I believe.”

“Thank you.”

“Of course.”

You started pouring your cereal, watching in slight amusement as she got the boys ready for school. “Bus is here! Get out the door! Bye! Love you! Make sure you take those extra lunches to-!”

“Yeah, mom! We know! Love you too!”

You gave a slight smirk as she huffed, looking around the kitchen at the pans and dishes left out. “Kids, huh?”

She gave you a smile. “Yeah. They’re a handful, but I wouldn’t trade them for anything. How about you? Any thoughts of kids?”

“Me?” Your eyes widened, nearly choking on your food. “Oh God no. Not right now, at least. I don’t even have a solid house right now. My life’s too off the walls for that.”

“And Bucky?”

You raised an eyebrow as she leaned on the counter. “Bucky? What about Bucky?”

“Does he want kids?”

“Uh…I dunno.” You shrugged, clearing your throat as you remembered your talk last night. “Kinda makes me wish I had my own.” You quickly pushed his words aside. “He hasn’t told me.”

“Wait, wait. You two…aren’t together then?”

You blinked, your eyes widening again. “Together? Me and Bucky? No…why? Did Sam say something?”

Her expression morphed into one of disbelief, crossing her arms. “Sam didn’t say anything. You guys did. Are you seriously expecting me to believe you aren’t together?”

“We’re not! I mean - he was flirting with you yesterday-”

“Right, okay. Honey, that’s flirting. And it’s harmless. The way he follows you like a puppy and you look at him like he hung the stars? That’s feelings. And that’s a lot more impactful than flirting.”

You frowned in contemplation. It was really that obvious? You were really that blind? This whole time? You knew Sam knew - but you just figured that’s because he’s been there since it started. And Sharon knew for the same reason. But Sarah? The woman you just met the day prior and had barely had a conversation with?

“It’s, uh…” You chewed on your cheek, swirling your cereal around. “It’s complicated.”

Sarah didn’t look impressed. “Do you like him?”

“I’m kinda in love with him-”

She shrugged, not letting you finish your bashful statement. “Then I don’t see what’s complicated about it.”

And that was that. She turned to clean up breakfast, leaving you alone with your thoughts.

You thought it was more complicated than that. I mean…you were in love with your best friend. Who left you. With the guy you had feelings for who just so happened to be your best friend/crush’s best friend. And now you were completely in love with your best friend’s best friend, but your best friend still had a piece of your heart.

But…you loved Bucky. And he was here. And Steve was not. And when you put it that way…you guess it wasn’t so complicated after all.

******************

You snickered as you walked up behind Sarah, the woman berating the men for not leaving the water pump along like she asked.

“Hi, Sarah.”

Sam shot Bucky a warning look, who grinned, but you were surprised to see Sarah ignore him, sending you a knowing glance instead, before turning back to Sam. “I told you specifically that the water pump was not the problem, and yet, here you are.”

“Yep, Samuel.”

You chuckled, Bucky shooting you a wink. “Yeah, Samuel.”

Sam narrowed his eyes at you, turning to Sarah. “In our defense, you were supposed to be done long before you woke up.”

You nearly facepalmed at his “defensive” and you were trying so hard to hold back laughing as she told Sam off, sending them away.

“I don’t wanna hear a peep from you.” Sam pointed at you, but that only made your chortles come out, and you didn’t even bother hiding them. “She’s a very mean person.”

“It’s tough love.”

You giggled as they started arguing, slipping an arm around their waists, their arms instinctually coming up to your shoulders.

“Oh my God. A prowess?”

“Yes, Y/N. A prowess.”

“You know, maybe if you someone let me help-”

“Hey, woah! You were tired! I let you sleep! I was being nice!”

“Too late now. I’ll be lucky if Sarah lets me within a hundred feet of it!”

“She got you so good, Sammy!”

“I agree with Buck for once! You’re too snippy right now! And c’mon man! Stop flirting with my sister!”

“It’s my natural charm.”

“Charm? What charm?”

“Ouch, doll! That one hurt!”

****************

“Okay.” You stepped out of the bathroom, walking over to the couch and setting the bag down on it. “I’ve got everything packed. We’ve got a little over an hour until we need to head out which gives you two time to go set something up for Sammy and maybe even a bit or training before we leave.” 

Bucky frowned. “You’re not gonna come out?”

“I will in a bit. I just got a phone call I need to take.”

Sam narrowed his eyes. “Government call?”

You gave a mocking smile. “Can you guess what they want to talk about? It’s okay. I’ll survive. It’s only a phone call, so I can always hang up. Pretend I didn’t have good service. I do it all the time.”

“I’m sure you do.” Sam chuckled. “In that case, I’m gonna go grab some stuff and get the shield.” As he walked out, he made sure to mouth at you behind Bucky’s back ‘conversation’ making you swallow thickly. You were planning on talking to Bucky anyways, and with Sam’s insistence…

“Okay, so, I was thinking when we get back-”

“Can I talk to you?”

Bucky stopped digging through the bag, blinking at you in surprise at your sudden burst. “Uh…well, we already are, so yes.” He chuckled, straightening and crossing his arms.

“I wanna have the conversation.”

He was left stunned, once again, his mouth opening and closing and his weight shifting form one foot to the other. “Like…that conversation? R-right now? Are you sure?”

You winced at her nervousness. “Sorry, sorry. I know it’s kinda…I just…I need to talk about it. Now.”

“Okay, okay. No, that’s fine. Don’t apologize. I just wasn’t expecting it.” Bucky cleared his throat. “That’s all.”

“Okay…” You breathed with a small nod. You opened your mouth, but Bucky shook his head.

“I hafta say this first; I didn’t mean to hurt you by telling you about Steve. I-I dunno what I thought. That it’d give you closure or something. I dunno. But it hurt you and I’m sorry. That wasn’t my intention.”

“Buck-”

“I was jealous. And guilty. And mad. And upset. I still am. Kinda. I guess. I dunno.” Bucky shook his head, running his hand through his hair and all you could do was gape at him as he started confessing to you. “Remember when we danced? In Madripoor? Doll…I don’t wanna dance ever again if it’s not with you. I fucking love you, Y/N. And not in the way we’ve said it before. I’m in love with you. I have been for-for a while now. I just - you were Steve’s. Steve loved you and you loved Steve and that was that and I was just the broken childhood best friend. But Steve left and he told me to take care of you and I didn’t know what to do with that, because you still love Steve. I think. I dunno. And I didn’t want to break what we have because you’re all I have left of him. You and that stupid shield. You’re my family. My home. I really meant it when I told you that. And that’s why I couldn’t tell you. Because it means too much for me to break what we have because I fell in love with my best friend’s girl. You know?”

He looked at you with pleading eyes, begging you to understand, but your brain was still trying to process what he was telling you.

“Oh God…” He groaned. “And now I just told you everything and you’re looking at me like that wasn’t what you wanted to hear and now I’m thinking this wasn’t the conversation you were thinking it was going to be-”

You were moving across the room before you could stop yourself, pulling him by the teal Henley you knew was comfortable having worn it to bed before when you visited him in New York, and slanting your lips over his.

His breathing hitched and he froze, and for a hot second you thought you made everything worse, but then he was kissing you back and his hands were on your hips and he was pulling you closer and it felt so fucking good you didn’t want to pull back for air.

“Shut up.” You muttered when you finally did pull back, your forehead against his, your eyes clenched shut. “Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up.” You pulled back to look up at him, chests heaving against each other, your eyes prickling. “I’m not good at this. I’m not good at opening up. I only ever was good at it with Steve but Bucky…I’ve been doing it with you. This whole time and I didn’t even realize it until the conversation in the car.”

He reached up to cup your cheeks, wiping away the relieved tears that were falling from the weight you were finally getting off your chest.

“I love you. I’m in love with you. How could I not be? After all that time in Wakanda? I was never Steve’s girl, Bucky. I wanted to be. Dammit, did I wanna be, but I wasn’t. Not really. And he’s gone. But you’re not. And I don’t know why it took me so long to see that. That you’re the one in front of me. You’re the one who held me when I needed it once he left. You’re the one that would listen to my rambles that I’m just realizing was most of our phone calls. You’re not just the broken childhood friend. Don’t ever think that. I don’t pick up the phone at five in the morning after searching for a friend until two for just anyone. Even Steve’s best friend. And I’m such an idiot because I’ve been pushing away my feelings all these years for Steve and then I let them out with you at the wrong time, because I love Steve, Bucky, but I’m not in love with him. Not since I fell in love with you. And I know it doesn’t make sense, but Steve was the first one I cared about and that’s just how I feel and I can try to explain, but-”

His lips crashed onto yours again and you could taste the salty tears that were pouring down your cheeks, but you didn’t care. He was holding you and he was kissing you and it was even more perfect than you thought it’d be.

“You’re adorable when you ramble, but Jesus Christ, shuddup, doll.” He breathed. “Just tell me you love me. Tell me you love me just a fraction of how much I love you.”

You looked up into those ocean eyes, your own shining with earnest affection. “James Buchanan Barnes. I love you.”

“That’s all I need to know.” He murmured against your lips, holding your head against his, still wiping away your tears. It felt like with each one that fell, you felt lighter and lighter. Like they were taking away every fear and anxiety you held within you for the past six months.

“Alright! I was thinking we could just set up in these trees out here - holy shit! Is it done? Did you do it? Did I miss it? Has the conversation been had?”

Bucky chuckled as you giggled. “He has the worst timing.” The last two words were loud enough so Sam could hear, although the man heard the whole sentence. 

“I’m gonna take that as a yes!” Sam cheered. “Halle-fucking-lujah! Finally! I was that close to locking you two in the attic.”

You shook your head at Sam’s personal celebration, drowning the rest of his words out as you looked at Bucky, who swept his thumb over your cheek catching one last tear, before pecking your lips.

“I finally get to kiss where I really want to.” He spoke softly, kissing your lips again. “Are you mine, doll?”

“I thought you said I’d always be your doll.” You answered cheekily. He grinned, kissing you again, pulling you against him by the hips.

“Okay, okay! That’s enough! We get it! You’re in love, finally, but I don’t wanna see it anymore! Now will you come help me with this shit?”

Bucky left one more lingering kiss on your lips, before you pushed him away reluctantly. “I’ll be right out.”

He nodded, moving over to help Sam carry the things he’d gathered.

You watched them put it all up from the window, gnawing on your cheek as you spun your phone in your hands. Coming to a decision, you tossed your phone in the duffle bag and walked out with it just as the boys finished.

“That was a quick phone call.” Sam raised an eyebrow.

You shrugged. “Didn’t call them. If they really need me, they’ll find me.”

Bucky grinned as you set the bag down under a tree, pecking your lips when you got close enough for him to grab by the waist to hold you against him. You rolled your eyes, shoving him playfully away and giggling as Sam let out a groan.

“Alright. Let’s see what you’ve got, Sammy.”

~

><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><><

Bucky knew he needed the tough love talk Sam was giving him. He needed to hear it. Because, deep down, he had known it all along, he just refused to believe it. He tried doing it. Making amends. He knew he wasn’t though. And of course he knew immediately who that one person would be.

“And hey.” Bucky looked at him. “Let me tell you what. Telling my girl all that you told her? That’s a good start. I’m proud of you. Both of you. You’re already happier. I can see it in your eyes.”

Bucky chuckled, shaking his head as he thought of the gorgeous woman he nearly let slip through his fingers. He looked over to the house, where she was inside somewhere getting ready after suddenly deciding she needed to shower before they left. “I was stupid.”

“Yeah you were. You both were. I’m so relieved it’s over.” Sam nudged him. “Treat her right, Buck. She deserves it.”

“I know…I just hope I can.”

Sam shook his head. “Uh-uh. Don’t do that. You were just starting to use that cyborg brain of yours! She chose you. And before you say anything,” Sam cut Bucky off from speaking as he opened his mouth to object. “She chose you before Steve left. It just took her dumbass this long to realize it.”

Bucky nodded, a small smile on his face. “Yeah…okay…” Before he could say anything, the goddess herself stepped out, jogging over, looking absolutely amazing in her jeans and his t-shirt. “Good talk.”

Sam laughed at his quick ending of the conversation as she came up besides them. “Talking about me?” She asked cheekily, eyes shining. Bucky couldn’t help but take her under his arm, pecking her lips. Now that he could, he didn’t think he could stop. He was addicted to say the least.

Throwing Bucky a wink, Sam shrugged. “Just all the things that get on our nerves.”

“Ha ha.” She rolled her eyes. “We better get going.”

Bucky and Sam clapped hands. “You know Karli won’t quit.”

Bucky smiled. “Ah. You call us when you have a lead and we’ll be there.”

Y/N stepped forwards to give Sam a hug. “Anytime, Sammy.”

“Eh. Anytime between noon and midnight.” Bucky corrected. “Or noon and ten. Noon and five…you better just call at noon to be safe.”

Sam rolled his eyes. “Sure, sure.”

“Not necessarily as a team.” Bucky continued, grabbing the bag, getting Y/N back in her spot at his side under his arm.

“Nope!”

“We’re not that good.”

“Definitely not.”

“We’re professionals.”

“Definitely.”

“And, uh, we’re partners.”

Sam snapped, pointing at him. “Coworkers.”

“But we’re also a couple of guys with a couple mutual friends.”

“Ones now gone and you’re dating the other.”

“So we’re a couple of guys…with a badass to help out.”

“I can live with that.”

“Perfect.”

“Oh my God.” Y/N let out that laugh Bucky could never get enough of, shaking her head at the two of them. “You forgot dumbasses.”

Sam shook his head. “Nuh-uh. That’s your couple name.”

“Dumbasses?”

“Oh yeah.” The three of them came to a stop, Bucky and his girl - God he loved confirming it now - facing Sam. “Thanks for the help, guys. Meant a lot.”

Bucky patted his shoulder. “Of course.”

Y/N shot him a wink. “Until we meet again, Sammy.”

“Until then, cher.”

Bucky couldn’t stop his grin as she wrapped her arms around his waist, the two of them starting to walk to the main road where she already ordered an Uber. He looked down at her, kissing her lips for the nth time in the past hour.

“I wish I didn’t wait so long,” he told her seriously. “But I’d wait a thousands more centuries if it meant I get to call you mine.”

She giggled, shaking her head. “You’re such a sap! But…” she moved up to kiss him and his heart stuttered. He knew he had a goofy grin on when she pulled back, but he couldn’t help it. Especially when she laughed again. “I have to agree with you on that, Buckaroo.”