𝐈 𝐖𝐈𝐒𝐇 𝐘𝐎𝐔 𝐖𝐎𝐔𝐋𝐃 𝐕𝐀𝐍𝐈𝐒𝐇 | 𝐌𝐀𝐓𝐓 𝐒𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐎𝐋𝐎
synopsis: Matt has been shutting you out due to his personal problems, which is causing problems in your relationship.
“girl , you mean the world to me , yes , you do , ooh” - givēon
matt sturniolo x poc!reader
warnings: fighting, crying , swearing, angst, and a somewhat happy ending
a/n: i honestly kind of hate this but it’s wtv 😭 , also this is my first time writing angst so it may be a bit rough
a/n 2: @luverboychris saw this first 👀
word count: 0.6k
The sound of your foot tapping against the car floor and the rain pattering around you filled the silenced car.
Matt was now driving you home after you guys had gotten into a heated argument.
𝐅𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊
“Matt, you can’t keep shutting me out like this!” You yell to him, your hands hitting the side of your legs.
“I don’t need to tell you every fucking thing that’s happening right now. I just don’t okay!” He screamed back, turning his gaze from the floor to you.
“Well Matt, this relationship won’t last then will it?” You ask him, letting your anger get to you. “Just please talk to me, I promise we’ll be on the same page if you just open up.” your tone getting a bit quieter as you try to calm down.
“It’s not like you’re a fucking saint either.” He murmurs out, “You've done this before and I left you alone, but when it comes to me it seems like I can’t have that space can I?”
“I just wish you vanish Matt,” you start. “then we wouldn’t have these fucking problems and arguments.” you say, your voice breaking towards the end, tears beginning to fall from you eyes. Matt’s face drops, his hands reaching towards you.
“Bab-“ Matt begins to say, but you cut him off. “No Matt, just take me home.” you say, slightly brushing his shoulder as you went out his bedroom door, and stomped your way to the car.
𝐄𝐍𝐃 𝐎𝐅 𝐅𝐋𝐀𝐒𝐇𝐁𝐀𝐂𝐊
You turn your body and stare at the window, your mind clouded with thoughts. You loved Matt with your whole life, but he would just get so stressful sometimes, to the point where you thought this wouldn’t work out any longer.
Your eyes begin to water, thinking about all the times you and Matt were happy, laughing, and talking about total nonsense. Tears are now falling against your cheeks, small sobs being heard throughout the car.
Matt glances over at you, regretting his past decisions. He looks back towards the road, the windshield wipers hastily moving as the rain poured harder. His mind was racing with thoughts, not wanting to lose you due to his poor choices.
You put your arm against the car door, resting your head against. The car pulls into your neighborhood, the water covered ground reflecting the lights planted on the sides.
Matt slowly cruises the car down the streets, your house approaching soon. You feel the car come to a complete halt, now looking out the window, and seeing your house. You take your seatbelt off, not saying anything to Matt as you open the passenger door.
The rain comes pouring down against your body as you exit, slamming the car door behind you. You hear Matt’s door open and shut, now picking up your pace, just wanting to get inside.
Matt runs up to you, wanting to get some pressure off of his chest. You feel his cold hand grip onto your upper arm, securing you so you don’t get free.
“Matt let me go!” You yell to him, more tears wanting to break free from your eyes. Matt ignores your plea, pulling you flush upon his chest. You fully break down, not caring about how wet you’re getting from the heavy downpour. He engulfs you in a deep hug, kissing the top of your head while you sob into him.
“I fucking hate you.” You mumble, ragged and shaky breaths leaving your lips.
“I, I know,” he begins, “I’m so sorry.” an exhale of breath following after. You sniffle, gazing up at Matt’s dripping face.
“I got stuff to work on, you got stuff to work on.” Matt says, staring deeply into your eyes, his eyes filled with regret and sadness.
“But, we’re gonna, we’re gonna make it work.” He continues, lifting your chin slightly with his index finger.
“I love you , okay.” He reassures, placing his cold, soft lips against yours. Your lips dance with his as the rain overtakes your bodies, hoping things will work out for the both of you.
tags: @mattslolita @muwapsturniolo @luverboychris @sturnsslut @bigbeefybitch @rileysturniolo @itsnotmariahh @summerssover @l0ver-i @thenickgirl @mattssluttygf @hoesformatt
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firstly I LOVE your writing so so so much!!! so many of my fav jily fics are yours <3
#34 from the prompt list (“sorry, bad habit”) but it’s james fidgeting (messing with his hair clicking a pen idk idc u do u) and lily is annoyed with him with herself for finding it endearing & finally does something about it
from these prompts
It’s not that she never noticed it before.
Context, however, is everything and there is just simply a stark contrast between noticing it because McGonagall consistently points it out with a heavy sigh and a ‘for the last time, Mr. Potter, please wear your uniform with a sense of propriety’ and noticing it because Lily can’t physically make herself look away.
She’s not quite sure when her mind takes that sharp detour, though.
“Merlin, I’m knackered.”
Lily looks up from her book as he falls into the seat across from her. “You’re late.”
James grimaces apologetically. “Flitwick had me helping the firsties with—never mind. Sorry. Let’s get started, yeah?”
He wasn’t her first choice for essay partner, or her second or third for that matter, but he’s competent, which Lily supposes she should be grateful for. Honestly, she’s still trying to wrap her head around the fact that school has been back in session for an entire month and they haven’t gotten in a row even once.
James pulls his bag up onto the small table and begins haphazardly fishing through it for his own textbook and some parchment, then reaches up and gives a sharp tug on the knot of his tie, pulling it away from his neck. Lily’s gaze catches on the motion she must have seen him do a dozen times, but she’s never been close enough to notice the sliver of skin it reveals before and she’s certainly never found herself appreciating it.
She quickly files that away as information to never ever process and shakes her head.
“Yeah, let’s get…” She clears her throat and looks back toward her book. “Started.”
But once she starts noticing it—well. It becomes a bit of a problem.
The moment he walks into the common room, his hand moves to loosen his tie. As soon as he collapses onto the couch of their shared Heads’ Office. While he walks alongside her to Arithmancy. Every single day. Constantly.
“Blimey, the weather’s gorgeous, isn’t it?”
Lily purses her lips to keep from smiling at the childish way James throws his hands up toward the sky the minute they step into the sunshine. It’s been a gruelling day of revising for both of them and she found herself not even able to muster a half-hearted excuse for why they shouldn’t take a break to go for a walk on the grounds.
“There’s just something about October,” he continues, sighing happily.
Lily opens her mouth to agree, but then she catches the flash of his hand—they’re not even fifteen steps away from the castle, but there he goes, the scarlet-and-gold-striped fabric slipping through his fingers as he makes quick work of the knot of his tie.
“Why do you always do that?” she finds herself blurting out.
He glances quickly over at her, his fingers freezing their motion. “Sorry,” he says, wincing, “bad habit.”
Lily just nods in response, not trusting herself to say something normal, and tries not to watch as he tugs the tie completely off and shoves it deep into the front pocket of his trousers.
October passes and Lily feels herself relax, because the Scottish autumn is on her side on this (and only on this, really). Hogwarts students spend the month of November adding more layers to their wardrobe, not removing them.
Lily has never in her life been so passionate about scarves.
“Most prestigious school in the wizarding world and they can’t bloody insulate the halls,” James whinges, blowing hot air into his cupped hands and rubbing them together.
Lily looks sharply away from that and ignores the little flop her stomach does. “That would compromise the ambience, Potter.”
“Of course. How can Hogwarts expect to maintain its honour if at least one student doesn’t die of hypothermia?”
Lily’s laugh is halted as they turn a corner and begin their portion of the patrol colloquially known among the other prefects as The Polar Vortex. This section of the castle seems to always be particularly drafty, and honestly, if Lily wasn’t eager to extend her time with James, she’d likely suggest they just skip it and head back to Gryffindor Tower.
As it is, though, she shivers involuntarily, her teeth clattering loudly together, unbidden.
“Merlin, Evans, here. Take—”
“I’m fine!” she says quickly, because, Jesus bloody Christ, he was reaching for his scarf.
“That hypothermia joke wasn’t a personal challenge, Lil. Take my scarf and—”
“I don’t want it!”
His next step falters and he turns slowly to face her, his face setting into a confused frown. “Why not?”
Lily feels her face begin to flush. “I just—I don’t want to be a…bother.”
James watches her for another moment, then a grin slowly spreads across his face. “Evans,” he says, unlooping the scarf from his neck, and turning to more fully face her, “you always bother me.” He gently drops the scarf around her neck, ignoring her protests as he tugs it snugly around the collar of her jumper.
Lily takes a breath, hating and loving the fact that the scarf smells exactly like him, but otherwise settles into a feeling of relief. That wasn’t so bad. Just because he removed his scarf doesn’t mean—
“Oh my God, are you serious right now?!”
James stops walking again, his fingers freezing in the midst of their mission to unknot his tie. “Er, what?”
Lily covers her face with her hands and tries not to scream.
“Evans?” He asks, and that pushes her closer to the edge, because she can hear the concern in his voice. “Am I serious about what?”
“Nothing,” she squeaks, shaking her head, even as her hands remain covering her face.
“Ev-ans.”
“No, really, I—”
He gently tugs one of the ends of the scarf—his scarf—causing her to stumble toward him a bit. “What’s wrong?”
She allows her hands to fall and forces himself to look up at him. “Why are you even wearing your tie?” she mumbles.
“What? My…tie?” He frowns, deeply puzzled, then manages a half-shrug. “I dunno. Just forgot to take it off after lessons, I guess. Why?”
“You constantly mess with it,” Lily says. “Non-stop. Loosening it, untying it, taking it off, playing with it.”
“I told you,” he says sheepishly, “it’s a bad habit. I—”
“It’s infuriating!”
His eyebrows lift in surprise. “I’m…sorry?”
“A Lily Evans torture device, really.”
He opens his mouth again, but she beats him to it.
“It’s like, if every person who’s ever hated me attended a…a convention. And they had a chat about all the things that drive me spare, devising a plan to slowly make me go completely mental. This—,” she knows she’s mad and that she’ll hate herself later, but she doesn’t care because she’s been wanting to do this for months,—��this is what they would end up deciding on.” She reaches up and, in one swift motion, tugs on the knot of his tie, watching in immense satisfaction as it separates from the collar of his shirt, hanging limply across the grey fabric of his jumper.
James stares at her, eyes wide, body completely rigid as she, Jesus, manhandles him like a fiend.
“Sorry,” she huffs out as she draws her hand back to her own person, but she isn’t even sure she means it. “You just—it really is a terrible habit, Potter. Promise me you’ll work on it.”
He blinks. “I…”
“Good.” Lily nods. “Thank you for the scarf, by the way. We should be good to head back down now, yeah?” She takes off walking down the corridor, before he can verbally question her sanity or she can do something else truly mad like use the leverage of his tie—stupid, bloody tie—to bring his mouth down to hers.
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Just so cute?
Part I
WC: 5.9k
Comments: This first part is just fluffy, but smut will come in during part two. I was inspired by a video I saw when scrolling on tiktok one time. All the members show up in this one, but it is idol!Seungmin x reader.
⋆。°✩
You scroll to the next video, and it’s a close up of Han during one of their concerts, yelling about how he “knows sexy.” You let out a chuckle as he starts going down the line of members saying, “Bang Chan, you are sexy! I’m sexy! Lee Know is sexy! I.N is sexy! Felix is sexy! Chan is sexy!” – you make a mental note to tease him about calling Chan sexy twice – “Hyunjin is sexy! I don’t know you, but you’re sexy!”
Why’s he gotta do Binnie like that, you giggle a little at the thought. Then he says, “No, Seungmin is just so cute! Hi puppy!”
You’re honestly a little surprised by how taken aback you are that he deviated and didn’t call Seungmin sexy. It’s a normal, silly Hannie thing to do, but you feel a little bad for Seungmin.
So you go to the search and try to find another angle of the interaction, to see if you can find Seungmin’s reaction. Another video with the entire stage in frame shows that Seungmin (very cutely) waves Han off, turning for a moment to hide his smile. You’re happy to see that he didn’t seem bothered… So why are you? Seungmin is cute. It’s not like Han was being mean or anything. Maybe you’ve just had enough tiktok for the night.
ᯓ★
The first week of August rolls around, the guys are back in town, and you’re on your way to the Cuties Dorm. When you arrive, you barely have a chance to cross the threshold before you’re lifted off your feet in one of Changbin’s signature hugs. You laugh and squeeze him back; you’ve missed these. As you’d expect when spending time with Stray Kids, yelling ensues - voices questioning who is at the door; is food is here; did someone get something delivered; did you forget that the hyungs are picking up food, idiot; who are you calling an idiot?! Luckily, Changbin sets you down before yelling back (still a bit too close to your ear considering how loud he is) that it was you and to calm down before he starts making people calm down.
This obviously just leads to more shouts and a big sigh from Changbin as you head toward the rest. You’re intercepted by Hyunjin and Jeongin, giving a hug and a fist bump, respectively. By the time you make it to the couch, you’ve said hello to a few of the members’ other friends and been momentarily koala-ed by Felix. You settle in next to Jisung on the couch, smiling broadly, happy to be back in this chaotic environment.
Then Seungmin comes into the living room. He stops in front of you and shakes his head. “Jisung, you were supposed to save my seat.”
“I mean the seat is still there,” Jisung points out helpfully. “It just has someone prettier sitting in it. You can always sit on my lap.” He wiggles his eyebrows up at a sighing Seungmin.
“Oh sorry, Min, I’ll – ” You move to give him back his spot on the couch, looking around in vain for another open seat that will help you avoid sitting on the floor. Instead of giving you space to vacate the couch, he slides his body just behind yours, arms wrapping around your middle. He sits, bringing you down to sit on his lap with a small oomph. “Seungmin!”
“It’s fine; we can share.” He reaches his arm across your body to pull your legs so that you angle more towards Jisung. You hesitate for half a second before slinging your arm around his shoulders and shifting a little more so that your lap is almost perpendicular to his, your back against the arm of the couch. His arm wraps around your middle, his big hand coming to rest on the curve of your hip.
Unbidden, that tiktok of the Chicago concert from a couple weeks ago pops into your head; you remember how affronted you were by Han saying Seungmin was cute rather than sexy. You feel heat rise on your cheeks and try to shake it off.
He sees the shake of your head and asks, “Are you uncomfortable? I can sit on the floor.”
You meet Seungmin’s eyes and pray that the blush isn’t noticeable.
What is wrong with me? You wonder. The guys have always been very touchy; this isn’t anything out of the ordinary. Felix was literally wrapped around you less than five minutes ago. You shake your head again and tell him, “No, I’m good. You just surprised me a little. I was sure you’d sit on Sungie.”
All three of you laugh at that, and Seungmin’s grip on your hip tightens, just a little bit.
ᯓ★
Aside from that moment of internal weirdness, the party goes well. There’s good food, karaoke, and very intense card games. By now, most of the non-members have left, so it’s just you, Minho’s dancer friend, and Jeongin’s girlfriend still hanging out. You hear a bunch of clinking, and everyone looks towards the kitchen. Felix has three bottles of soju in each hand. Jisung is next to him holding a stack of tiny cups and the jenga box with a wide smile. “Let’s gooooo!”
Felix raises his hands as Jisung yells, bottles clinking together dangerously again.
“Why is Tiny Hands the one with all the bottles?” Jeongin sighs, garnering a laugh from all but Felix, who pouts at him. The Sunshine Twins bring over their goods, setting them on the coffee table. Minho starts pouring cups of soju, knowing what flavors his friends prefer and distributing them accordingly as everyone moves to surround the table. Chan grabs the jenga box and flips it upside down to set it up. With the box halfway off, he pauses and leans in. “Jisung…”
Jisung doesn’t even let him get the question out. “Oh, come on, hyung! We deserve some fun!” The rest of you (rather comically) turn your heads to look at the game, trying to see what Chan sees. You notice what seems to be writing on the side of a couple of the blocks.
“Hyung, you know you’re supposed to write on the bottom so the task isn’t visible before you pull them, right?” Jeongin shakes his head.
Han shoots daggers at Felix. “Bro!”
“I’m sorry!” Felix throws his hands up. “In my defense, it’s only a few.” Chan slides the box the rest of the way off, exposing more clearly incorrectly marked blocks. “... more than 3?”
Everyone’s laughing again as Chan reads off a couple of the blocks, and Jisung is trying to pull Felix into a headlock. “Take a drink. Give out two drinks. Do aegyo for the next two turns. Give the person to your left a forehead smooch. I guess these are fine, as long as everyone wants to play.”
The game is actually really fun. Some tasks written on the blocks are more silly than others, some get a little racy. Hyunjin has to do a freestyle rap about bubbles. Changbin has to give Minho a five second lap dance. He only slaps Changbin’s butt twice within those five seconds; everyone is impressed with his self-restraint. When Jeongin’s block says to take off an item of clothing, he pulls off Felix’s socks and shrugs. “It doesn’t say it has to be an item of my clothing.”
Felix tries and fails to get the rest of you to agree that Innie needs to strip. Then when it’s your turn, the block you pull says ‘kiss someone sexy.’ You tilt your head back with a loud exhale. Jisung is giggling off to your left. “If you need help choosing, I know sexy.”
You can almost see Seungmin’s smile and wave on that concert stage. Without taking time to consider any more, you crawl past Minho and kiss Seungmin directly on the lips. It’s quick, your embarrassment keeps you from lingering, even as you ponder how soft his lips are and what it might be like to give him a proper kiss. There are a few ‘oohs’ and ‘ahhs’ from the group; Felix claps Seungmin on the back, saying he would’ve kissed him, too. Seungmin rolls his eyes at Felix, but other than that he doesn’t really react. You realize belatedly that the block didn’t say you had to kiss him on the lips. You hope that no one comments on that as you add it back to the top of the tower. It wiggles precariously, but stays standing. It makes it two more turns before Felix (of course) knocks it down.
“Should we play again, or should we play something that makes us drink more often?” Minho asks with a mischievous gleam in his eyes.
“Or get another jenga set and write more interesting tasks?” His friend looks just as devious. You haven’t spent much time around him, but it’s clear why he and Minho get along.
“You know you don’t have to wait until the game tells you to drink, right?” Chan looks a little nervous at his friends’ suggestions.
“Yes, but not everyone is.” Minho looks pointedly at the glass Chan has only refilled a few times. “Hannie wants to get wild, Channie Hyung.”
“What if everyone just takes two shots now, and we play again,” Jeongin suggests, his girlfriend eyeing him. You all know he’s a little bit of a lightweight.
Minho rolls his eyes. “Fine, but shots of liquor, not soju. Lix, what do we have in the kitchen?”
Felix scurries off to find more alcohol while Hyunjin sets the tower back up. After sitting around the coffee table to play the first round, everyone else is happy to take the opportunity to stand and stretch a bit, talking about the best parts of the last game. Jisung pulls you over to the hall with a grin. “So Seungmin is your someone sexy, huh?”
“Sungie, you need to get those eyebrows under control.” You will your rising nerves to dissipate. Your comment does nothing to dispel his giddy expression. “You are so ridiculous.”
He laughs. “You don’t have to be embarrassed; Minnie is so cute. I just would’ve thought you’d kiss Hyunjin or Chan Hyung.”
“He’s not just so cute; he is sexy.” You respond without thinking, and his smile somehow widens. “I mean! You know that you’re all hot. All of you. Very sexy. Stop looking at me like that, Han Jisung!” You turn away from him and notice the others are gathering around the tower again. “I think they’re ready to start the next round.”
You walk away without waiting for his response, your cheeks burning. For what feels like the billionth time, you wonder what is wrong with you. Do you.. like Seungmin? You’ve been friends with the guys for such a long time, and while you have had moments of attraction to a few of them, it’s never felt like this before. Even when you kissed them.
When you get back to the coffee table, you’re informed that you’re all moving spots to mix things up, in case of the ‘to your left’ and ‘to your right’ blocks. There are bottles of whiskey, rum, and tequila on the table. You sit across from where you were before, and a shot glass is almost immediately set in front of you. You look up to see Seungmin sitting down on your right with his own shot in hand. He lifts it to you, signaling that you should cheers him. He misreads the look on your face. “Don’t worry, I made sure you got tequila.”
You clink your glass to his, touch it down to the table, sliding it in a circle before bringing it up to your lips.
“I’ve seen you do that before, what is that?” Jeongin’s girlfriend makes a circle motion with her fingers as she asks.
Before you can answer, Changbin pipes up. “Didn’t you say that it’s meant to bring you good orgasms?”
As the others laugh, Seungmin refills your glasses. Quietly, he says, “Better take another one, then, huh?” Just like that, your blush is back.
Everyone else picks up their glasses as well, the lot of you cheersing, everyone adding the circle to their movements. The game gets a little sloppier by the end this time - a combination of everyone drinking a bit lot more liberally and the Bunny Bois (Minho loves it when you all call them that) calling out modifications to the tasks with nearly every pull. There’s more kissing, outlandish impromptu lyrics, a lot more clothes on the floor. More than once someone has tears in their eyes from laughing. It’s a great time.
Jeongin and his girl sneak off before the start of the third round, giggles and low murmurs trailing down the hall behind them. Hyunjin starts off the round sitting behind Changbin, his arms and legs wrapped around him, his chin resting on Binnie’s shoulder. Felix has somehow convinced Chan to leave his shirt off. It’s been quite a while since you’ve all let go so much.
You feel Seungmin’s arm wrap around you again as he rests his head on your shoulder. You steal a glance at his face, eyes skimming past soft lashes and down the gently curved bridge of his nose; your gaze fixes on his lips. They’re so.. pink and perfectly shaped. When Jisung pokes you in the side. You realize you’d been staring, and it’s your turn. He’s giving you a knowing look as you glare back at him. You feel a little better after assigning three Minho butt slaps to him. By the time Minho slings Jisung over his lap and delivers them, you’ve nearly forgotten your annoyance.
Seungmin’s turn is next. His block says to kiss the person on his left’s forehead, but Minho interjects. “Foreheads are for the weak! Kiss her on the lips, Seungminnie!”
“Hyung, you have to tell him how long to kiss!” Felix, that drunken, oblivious backstabber, chimes in. Your traitorous brain hopes for at least 7 seconds. “Five minutes!”
You’re taken out of your internal battle by the ridiculously long suggestion. Everyone is laughing as Seungmin’s hand cups your face and pulls your lips to his. It’s gentle at first, but then his tongue runs along your bottom lip, requesting access. Your lips part, allowing him to deepen the kiss as his hand slides up into your hair. All too soon, he pulls back, and it’s like your ears open to all the whooping and wolf whistles that probably started with the kiss. You both sit back, rosy-cheeked, and the game moves on as if you didn’t just have an earth shattering experience.
You finally understand why you were so bothered by Han’s silliness at the concert.
There’s no question. Kim Seungmin is in fact quite sexy, and you would really like to kiss him again.
ᯓ★
Seungmin is your friend, though. Just like the rest of them. Skinship, including kisses every now and then, is completely normal among the group, definitely not a big deal. The thoughts running through your head right now are quite the opposite. You’ve never craved Felix’s touch. Never had to suppress the urge to lean in to steal another kiss from Chan’s lips, to straddle Hyunjin with your hands buried in his hair while you suck his bottom lip between your teeth.You bite your lip and turn away from him, praying that everyone is too drunk to see how affected you are.
A shout brings your attention back to the game, which has just ended because of Hyunjin tickling Changbin as he tried to pull his next block. No one moves to set the tower up right away, half of them are too busy yelling at Hyunjin about party fouls and a need for punishment, the other half already fighting about what his punishment should be. Only Chan, in the middle of it all, is speaking at a reasonable (read: inaudible) volume, looking pressed. You smile, happy to have a distraction, and crawl over to him.
“Channie! You’re gonna get wrinkles if you keep that up!” You fling your arms around his neck, and he uses your momentum to scoop you into his lap. And it’s completely normal. You know he’s hot as hell, and if he were someone else, such intimate contact might feel different. But it’s just you and Chan, very close, and there’s no desire to pull him into a bed and ravish him. As it should be. You tell yourself not to look back at Seungmin.
“You know they’re going to make him drink something stupid, and he’s gonna end up throwing up.” Chan buries his face into your neck. He sounds exasperated. “And I always have to clean it up and deal with it.”
You can’t help but laugh, giving him a little squeeze. “You say that like you don’t know that as soon as you yell at them, they’ll knock it off.”
“Fatherhood is the worst,” he whines comically. “I don’t wanna be the dad tonight. You do it, Noona.”
“I think you just wanna hear me yell for once.” You pull away from him, relying on his arms around your waist to keep you from tumbling off his lap. “You all need to calm down!”
You honestly didn’t expect it to work so well; you didn’t think you’d be loud enough, but (almost) everyone quiets and looks at you. You can still hear Jisung and the Bunny Bois giggling while they ransack the cabinets for something terrible. “Jinnie, you do deserve a punishment – nope, don’t interrupt me!”
Hyunjin’s ‘but Noona’ is all that comes out before the admonishment, but he squishes his face between his hands, staring at you with big, soft eyes.
You continue, “and Binnie gets to pick it as long as it won’t result in vomit.”
Hyunjin pouts adorably, turning those big eyes on Changbin. Predictably, Binnie crumbles at the cuteness. “Hyunjin has to… do a little magic Mike dance for us.”
His statement is met with a couple sighs and a loud ‘yes’ from Minho as he pops back into the room. Someone moves the coffee table out of the way, and you all pile onto and in front of the couch. This time you’re the one with someone on your lap; Felix is a comforting weight as well as a good block to keep Seungmin out of your line of sight. Once you’re all settled, Minho starts playing “Pony” by Ginuwine. It’s been a minute since any of you have seen the film, but you’re pretty sure he moves exactly like Channing Tatum. Still, empty plastic cups, random clothing, and even a jenga block all go flying at Hyunjin as the guys yell about how he’s not doing it right or needs to be sexier or is blinding them. His dance lasts about 20 seconds before everyone is falling together laughing, and Hyunjin launches himself at Jisung for hitting him in the face with a sock.
ᯓ★
Things start to wind down now that the games are over. Most of the alcohol is gone, and Seungmin is passing out waters. You’re back in Chan’s arms, a common occurrence when you’ve all been drinking together. Over the years, you’ve determined he likes to hold you because you’re shorter than him. He rests his chin on your head, even though you’re not that much shorter. Despite his drunkenness and earlier comment, he still plays his role as dad of the group. “Everyone’s staying here, yeah? All the keys are in the basket? Innie didn’t leave the dorm, did he? They wouldn’t have driven, right? Innie!”
Minho slaps a hand over his mouth before he can yell louder. “Jeongin and his lady retired to bed a while ago, Channie Hyung. No need to worry.” Minho gives him a wink before asking you to make sure he drinks at least two more glasses of water before bed.
You salute Minho as he grabs a bottle of water for himself and starts heading towards the bedrooms, the other half of his duo on his heels. Jisung and Hyunjin already seem to be in the process of passing out on the couch, snuggling while trading slurred insults. Changbin is curled up on the chair snoring, leaving Chan, Felix, Seungmin, and you sitting in a semicircle; Seungmin and Felix are weighing the benefits and consequences of drawing on Changbin’s face.
You bring the next round of waters over, reaching the group in time to hear Felix ask Chan if they’re going to cuddle tonight. Seungmin meets your eyes as you hand him his cup and says, “Sounds like that leaves you in my bed tonight.”
You’d done so well putting those thoughts out of your mind for the last couple hours, but at that simple statement you’re picturing yourself in bed with him. His hands on your hips, his mouth on your neck, your legs wrapped around –
“Noona, are you in there?” Seungmin snaps once in front of your face, bringing you back to reality. He’s got a lazy smile on his face. You almost let yourself get distracted by it again; he’s gotten into the habit of hiding his smile since he got his braces, and you hate it. It does, however, make his already infectious smile a bit more dazzling when he allows you to see it.
You give him a smile back. “Yeah, sorry. Just a little lost in thought.” You glance at your favorite Aussies. Chan’s got his arms around Felix now, who looks like he’s about ready to fall asleep. You look back at Seungmin and nod. “Drink up, guys; it’s time for bed.”
Felix pretends to protest as Chan picks him up to carry him to his room, only really pulling away from him to give you and Seungmin each a half hug and a kiss. Chan puckers his lips at you both, blowing kisses as you all say goodnight. Seungmin links his arm through yours and guides you toward his room.
You stand in the center of his room awkwardly and smack your cheeks, telling yourself to chill out and be normal. You hear Seungmin laugh behind you and turn to face him. “Do you just want a big shirt to wear?” He doesn’t even wait for your answer before tossing one at you and heading to the bathroom.
By the time he returns, you’re wearing nothing but his t-shirt and your panties, sitting on his bed.
“I left a fresh toothbrush on the counter for you.” He barely even glances at you as you hop off the bed and head to the door. You feel a little silly for expecting anything else.
When you get back, you slide in on your side of the bed and lay facing away from him. Seungmin throws his arm across your middle, pulling you over so he can spoon you from behind. He gives you an extra squeeze as he rests his chin on your shoulder. “Did you have fun tonight?”
“Yeah, it was great. I always love when you guys get back from tour.” You hope he can’t feel your heart hammering in your chest. “What about you, Minnie?”
He gives a contented sigh. “Yeah, I missed you.”
He presses a kiss to your neck, lingering longer than necessary. You turn in his arms to look at him. His eyes are hooded, his gaze boring into yours. You reach up and lightly caress his cheek. “I missed you, too, Seungmin-ah.”
He missed you. You give in to the desire that’s been coursing through you all night and gently pull his lips down to yours. It’s sweet. A softer kiss than before. Perfect. You feel his lips break into a smile against yours and pull away. “Goodnight Noona.”
ᯓ★
The first thing you notice when you wake is Seungmin’s breath in your ear. On other nights when you’ve shared his bed, you might cuddle for a little while, but you don’t typically sleep through the night that way. You’ve never woken to the sensation of his warmth around you, his arm heavy over your waist, his leg slung over one of yours, the top of his thigh pressed to the bottom of your other one. As your awareness spreads, you notice something else you’ve definitely never felt before.
Seungmin’s hardness is pressed into your backside. You consider trying to sneak out of bed without waking him, but when you go to pull his arm away, his grip tightens. Next you try shifting your hips away from his, but with his leg over yours, holding you in place, you end up basically just grinding against him. A low, sleepy moan fills your ear as he snuggles even closer. You resolve to stay still, just wait for him to wake up and pretend you’re still sleeping. It works for a couple minutes, but you’re getting restless. You can’t help but wish you could sneak your hand between your bodies to feel his length, get a sense of how big he is, because from what you can feel, it’s pretty impressive. You try to keep your mind from wandering, from continuing that line of thought. The discomfort of resisting lustful thoughts about your friend manifests in small shifts of your body.
You don’t notice Seungmin’s breathing move from the slow, deep breaths of sleep to a quicker, more purposeful pace. You do, however, notice when his hand flattens against your stomach, stilling your movement. “Everything okay, Noona?”
His voice is deep and gravelly with sleep. You bite your lip and will yourself not to roll your hips back into him to see what that moan might sound like now that he’s awake. You hope you sound like you’ve only just woken up as well. “Mmm morning, Min. I’m good; are you okay?”
You brace yourself to lose the heat of his body now that he’s up, and you mourn the loss of it when he pushes away from you. It doesn’t last long, though. His hand remains on your body; as he settles into place, he pulls on your hip, turning you so that you’re on your back, your side now pressed to his front. Seungmin looks down on you from where he’s propped up on his elbow, his other hand sliding back up to rub across your waist. His expression is solemn, a bit sensual, as his eyes trace your face. You inadvertently pull your lower lip between your teeth again, and he lets out a small sigh.
“Can I ask you something?”
You give a small nod. “Anything.”
“Can I kiss you again?”
You can’t help but smile. You reach up to cup his face, the action answer enough for him. Seungmin lowers his lips to yours, tentative at first, little more than a peck, before he renews his effort, lips parting yours, sliding his tongue into your mouth to dance with yours. His hand reaches around to grab your ass as you turn toward him and slide your leg up over his hip.
Just then, the door opens, startling you apart as Minho’s voice calls in, “It’s time to get up! People need your help with this damn espresso machine, Seungmin-ah.”
You look at each other, breathing heavily. Seungmin sits up first. “I’d better get up. You can wear anything you want.” He looks back down, boba eyes burning into yours. He presses another kiss quick to your lips. “I think we should talk later.”
You nod, and he heads out to the kitchen. You lay there for a moment, waiting for your body to cool down. Did that really just happen? How are you going to talk to him later if you don’t know how you feel? Why have things changed? Because they have changed. You can’t deny it. And you aren’t the only one who realized it. You pull a pair of Seungmin’s shorts on and go looking for Jisung.
ᯓ★
You find a sleepy Jisung snuggled in a chair with Felix. As you approach, the sunshine of Felix’s smile nearly blinds you. “You look like you need caffeine, Noona. Want me to get you a drink?”
You can always count on his sweetness. “Thanks, Lixie. I’ll take over with your baby here.”
Felix heads to the kitchen and you sit with Jisung more or less on top of you. “Hannie, can I talk to you about something?”
His mischievousness from last night is mostly missing from his smile. “Anything for you, Noona. What’s up?”
You resist the urge to pinch him. “Why were you teasing me last night? About Seungmin?”
“Well,” he looks a bit more serious than usual. “You were extremely easy to tease last night.”
You seriously consider dumping him off the chair and just leaving. “I’m gonna tell Lino you were talking shit about his cats, Sung.”
“Nooooo! No, don’t, please.” He stops laughing and takes your hand, peeking up at you while he flips it over and runs his fingers over it. “I don’t know. You had a different energy last night when you were looking at him. Plus, you know he… actually nevermind.”
You pinch his cheeks together with one hand, forcing him to look directly at you. “No nevermind. Finish that sentence, Han Jisung.”
“You’re so hot when you’re angry, Noona.” Han puckers his lips, leaning into your touch and trying to land a kiss. You bop him on the nose. “Okay, okay. Seungminnie has just been talking about you a lot. And when you were looking at him like you wanted to take a bite, then you kissed him… It seemed like things were falling into place.”
You sit dumbfounded for a second. “He’s been talking about me, how?”
Before he can answer, Seungmin arrives with Felix in tow. “I heard you might need something to drink.”
Your cheeks are red, again, and Jisung is giggling, asking where his coffee is. He scoots over as much as possible and Felix plops down on both your laps. Seungmin laughs, asking if you all were really going to sit in the chair together.
Felix sighs into you. “We love being close, Seungminnie. I bet we can make room for one more.”
Seungmin’s smile and laugh are breathtaking. “That’s ok, Yongbok-ah. I’m still on barista duty.”
He walks away and Felix snuggles in with his mug, asking what you were talking about.
“Just how cute you are, Lix,” Jisung responds, giving him a poke in the side. Unfortunately, your talk about Seungmin is over.
ᯓ★
Over lunch, there’s debate over whether they’ve celebrated their temporary return to Korea enough or if you all might as well make this a weekend affair. It’s Chan vs. Minho, and Chan is definitely lacking supporters. You all know that he doesn’t take nearly enough time for himself, and last night ended early (by some people’s accounts). Everyone is still there anyway, not surprising considering how late you all woke up, so why not just see where things go.
“It’s not ‘seeing where things go’ if you’re going out to buy party supplies, Minho.” Chan is trying and failing to keep control. You decide it’s time to speak up.
“Channie, when’s the next time you guys are going to be able to do something like this? You know that you’ll start performing again in September, plus you’re gearing up for your next comeback. Come next week, you’re gonna be back to business.”
Chan looks at you, hand splayed over his chest with feigned hurt in his eyes. “Et tu, Noona? Fine, but we’re not inviting too many more people over if you guys are still trying to ‘get wild,’ got it?”
After that, you and the 3Retcha guys head out for a shower, change of clothes, and maybe a nap. Rather than heading to their place, Jisung offers to escort you to yours.
He picks up your previous conversation. “Listen, I’m not saying anything has or needs to change. We all love you. But I feel like I was picking up on something, and I wanna make sure you know that the rest of us wouldn’t treat or love you any differently if things did change.”
You consider his words carefully. He still hasn’t actually given you a reason to change things. Seungmin might’ve, with that kiss, but you hadn’t gotten a chance to talk to him yet. It may have been a spur of the moment situation. He clearly woke up hard with you rubbing against him and probably got caught up in the moment. You can’t hold him to it. And last night was nothing. A game and a goodnight kiss. “I know, Sungie. I just don’t think this is something you need to worry about.”
Jisung takes a quick nap in your bed while you shower, and after you dress, you climb into bed with him. It feels natural, normal. You snuggle until you end up waking up an hour or so later. Since he didn’t return to his dorm, he ends up showering and just wearing some of your clothes. You head back to the Cuties dorm after picking up everything on the grocery list Minho sent you. When you arrive, there’s much less fanfare than the day before. You drop things off in the kitchen, and hope that more people arrive before Seungmin emerges from his room and asks you to talk. You’re still not sure what to do about him.
Jeongin and his girlfriend are being disgustingly cute in the living room when you settle onto the couch. Soon, though, Jeongin leaves the room and it’s just you girls. “Can I ask you for advice about something?”
You’re a little surprised. It’s not that you don’t talk to her when you see her, but you’re not really friends. You don’t even have her number. “Sure, what’s up?”
She surprises you further by plopping down right next to you, and pulling out her phone for you to see. “Innie has been wanting to try some new stuff, and I’m not super sure about it. Have you ever used anything like this?”
You consider the image on her phone for a second. You now know more about Jeongin’s tastes than you ever thought you would. You like having this time to bond, though, so you answer and ask some questions of your own. You end up sharing about experiences you’ve had and fantasies yet to be fulfilled. Next thing you know 45 minutes have passed and you feel much closer to the girl who will hopefully be around for a long time.
“Okay, so tell me about you and Minnie?”
You search her face for a sign of.. anything. “What do you mean?
Finally, someone else is blushing. She keeps her eyes down as she says, “Oh, nothing. I just.. I must’ve misunderstood. I thought you guys were like getting together or something. You looked so cute together last night. I guess I just thought you were into him, too.”
Too. Your heart is beating faster, and your mind is racing. Does he have feelings for you? First Jisung, now her – or more likely Jeongin through her. “Are you saying –”
Speak of the devil, Jeongin lands on the couch on her other side suddenly. “What are you lovely ladies talking about?”
“Hi baby!” And just like that, they’re back to being disgustingly cute. After what feels like an hour-long kiss, they start talking about what games to play tonight, and your opportunity to ask what she may have heard from or about Seungmin is gone.
Eventually others arrive, Minho and Chan whip up a wonderful meal while the rest of you sing karaoke, and now it’s time for drinks to flow freely and games to begin. You and Seungmin have shared a few glances, but with all the others around, you haven’t had a moment alone. You can’t help but wonder what the night will hold.
⋆。°✩
To be continued…
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