#I’ve worked 40 at every job for so long but my partner is working and I can afford it so BOOM | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

slinkywhat · 1 year

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Opportunity Cost & AI

[An off-the-cuff essay no one asked for but I word-vomited anyway because I am exhausted]

I literally started a Python coding course on Friday so that I can ask ChatGPT or other AI tools to write me scripts to execute basic, tedious tasks that currently take up an absurd amount of my time.

I work a highly-paid role that’s supposed to be very strategic, but I’m easily spending 40-60% of my time executing repetitive, tactical tasks across multiple, disparate systems because my company (and every company prior—it’s not unique to this place) won’t pay for productivity software, automation plug-ins for our project management software, actual project managers, or additional junior headcount, our third-party agency partners don't have access to work inside internal systems, etc. etc. etc.

People spend more than half their day doing busywork, according to survey of 10,000 plus workers | CNBC, 2022

“The amount of time office workers have to spend doing their primary job duties decreased in 2016, from 46% to 39%. When asked what gets in the way of work the most, workers say wasteful meetings (59%) and excessive emails (43%) are the biggest offenders.” U.S. State of Enterprise Work Report | Workfront, 2016-2017

If you take just my salary and calculate the opportunity cost there, it more than justifies the cost of at least one or two these tools—then multiply that by all of the other employees in the company with the same or similar barriers to actual productivity and it’s literally a no-brainer.

opportunity cost (noun) • the loss of potential gain from other alternatives when one alternative is chosen; can be implicit (intangible) or explicit (tangible, dollar amounts); often calculated as the difference between the return on investment (ROI) between the most profitable business decision and the current/chosen one.

Alas, almost every company I’ve been at or heard about from others is short-sighted when it comes to realizing opportunity cost—whether from the ROI on investments like software, ongoing training, professional development, employee satisfaction and retention, systems maintenance and technological upgrades, user experience, or bare minimum marketing strategies—because they “cost money.”

I’ve never understood this, because humans have an inherent loss-aversion cognitive bias—psychologically, we’re twice as motivated by avoiding potential loss than we are by pursuing potential gain, and we’re more likely to take risks to prevent loss. I suppose the problem is that the culture of busywork is so ingrained that it’s perceived as the baseline, where “increased” productivity is viewed as a potential gain, rather than decreased productivity as a major loss.

Hasn’t anyone ever heard of short-term pain for long-term gain?

So, please hit me up if you have ideas on how to leverage ChatGPT and other tools to do things like batch cloning Jira tickets and generating documentation from templates; managing an overflowing email inbox; logging system data into disparate, static spreadsheets instead of intelligent, connected systems; manually searching old Jira tickets to append implementation dates to that data; finding and replacing duplicative instances of copy that aren’t using global elements/a single database source for management; pulling, consolidating, and analyzing reports from multiple disconnected systems; etc.

I’m really, really tired of spending my time and energy on easily automated work that does not challenge me or contribute to my sense of pride or satisfaction in my work, but does radically waste my time and my employer’s money.

Let’s help each other automate some shit and work smarter, not harder. It’s 2023 and we have not made all of these technological advancements just to ignore them and perpetuate the arbitrary 40-hour work week.

If we can spend half the time or less to reach our goals at work, then we can actually focus on the strategic parts of our roles to move the needle and invest more time in ourselves. We have the tools to be able to spend more of our time on personal passions and pursuits, family and friends, travel, leisure, hobbies, community engagement, volunteering, political activism, exercise and health, financial planning and management, home improvement, or whatever is currently being neglected or would improve our quality of life, happiness, and in return, our contributions to our workplaces.

Automation is the future. Contrary to much of the fear-mongering around the topic of work automation, four out of five knowledge workers see it as a chance to rethink work in new and exciting ways. Sixty-nine percent believe work automation will give them back time to perform their primary job duties better. The only hesitation that exists seems to lie in how much of work will ultimately be done by machines and how much will still require the human touch.” The State of Enterprise Work, U.S. Edition | Workfront, 2017 - 2018

It’s literally a win-win—except, perhaps, for the politicians and systems of power that seek to limit our financial flexibility, ability to organize, and the security to push for change.

P.S. Call and email your representatives—repeatedly—and tell them you will donate, campaign, and vote for their opponents in the next election if they do not vote NO on The Restrict Act.

——————

More reading for the nerds:

“Digital workers won’t settle for bad tech - Nearly half of workers say they’re likely to leave their current job if they’re unhappy or frustrated with workplace tech. (49%)” The 2021 State of Work — How Covid-19 changed digital work. | Adobe Experience Cloud, 2022

“Wasteful practices and tools—namely email and meetings—continue to thwart worker productivity. As in years past, poorly used meetings and email topped the list of things that keep knowledge workers from getting work done, with U.S. workers having an average of 199 unopened emails in their inboxes at any given time. This report certainly makes the case that email has reached the limits of its effectiveness as a work management tool.” The State of Enterprise Work, U.S. Edition | Workfront, 2017 - 2018

Why Busywork Is Making Your Employees Spend Less Time Doing Their Actual Jobs | Inc., 2016

Opportunity Cost: Missing the Mark on Motivation for Two Types of Employees | Maxim Kind, LinkedIn, 2018

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wickedwretch · 1 year

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Hello and welcome to this Pinned Post. My name— or rather my Alias is Beale. This (side)blog was created specifically so that I could try and find some one or multiple roleplay partners. It’s nothing fancy, so hopefully you can look past that. If you’ve come here you’re interested in some 1 on 1 roleplay with me, which is super cash money. But first, let’s get down to brass tacks.

You may be be asking, “Beale, why not just make a roleplay blog?” Tumblr roleplay has become way too focused on aesthetic for me and having to make each post pretty just takes the fun out of it. And if your posts aren’t pretty, people are less likely to interact with you. And frankly, I don’t have the time to log on from a computer to do all the work it takes to reply. I enjoy having the muse pages and such, but I just don’t have the time for it. (As much as I miss some aspects of it) So my solution is discord. I can reply to threads from my phone, and it just makes life easier. Now to the bullet points.

I’m Old™️, so I ask that you are of age if we interact. Especially if smut is involved. Though truthfully, 90 percent of the time I’d prefer the scene fade to black so to speak, but every once in a while I’ll write it out.

I have a full time job. I work 40+ hrs a week. I also have ADD, depression and anxiety and sometimes that makes replies slow. So bear with me. Sometimes I’m fast and sometimes I’m slower than smoke off shit, there is no in between.

I truthfully don’t have a lot of triggers, so I’m always open to most plots. Communication is important and if there’s something I’m doing that you’re not comfortable with, please don’t hesitate to say something! I’m here to have fun, not cause upset. I ask that you give me that same courtesy.

I’d prefer if you were semi-literate, though I totally understand if English is not your first language. Replies do not ever have to match lengths, just as long as I have enough to work with! (:

I’m oc friendly (I have a few myself!) and fandom friendly. I’ll list the fandoms below and the characters I’m willing to write.

MCU: Wanda Maximoff, Kate Bishop, Yelena Belova.

Pitch Perfect: Beca Mitchell, Aubrey Posen, Stacie Conrad, Emily Junk.

Charmed: Piper Halliwell, P.J Halliwell, Melinda Halliwell, Henry Mitchell Jr.

American Horror Story: Misty Day, Nora Montgomery, Sister Mary Eunice, an OC.

Grey’s Anatomy: I’ve written a few main ogs, but mostly I just have next gen ocs.

Then I have a handful of fandomless ocs that I’d be happy to list for you.

I ship my characters with chemistry, but most of the time I do fxf or occasionally fxm (mostly because I don’t have a lot of male characters lmao)

Plots of all kinds are welcome!

If after all of this you’re interested, shoot me a message here with your rules/guidelines and if we click, I can drop my discord! Thanks for taking the time to read!

I hope you have a fantastic day/night and I look forward to hopefully writing with you!

-Beale

#pinned post~

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oliviridian · 2 years

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Reflecting

I can’t help but think now that we’re 5 weeks into this root canal of a break-up how utterly unromantic the relationship really was.

It was founded a long time crush on my part that was never reciprocated until I was emotionally present for her in a hard time. Then, we transitioned to LDR which she hated so much, that she couldn’t stand at all. So I visited in person and she visited in person, and then I stayed there. When she found out the dorms at the college she was likely to go to wouldn’t let her stay in the women’s it was a reminder that her home state wasn’t kind to people like us. I suggested she could come stay with me and my Mom, start working and eventually we could move out together. She would have a chance at the dorms here in Washington too. Without researching she jumped on the plan. When she found out that she needed a year of residency to make tuition affordable, she focused all of her attention on getting money for a car. Then getting us out of my Mom’s and into a studio apartment.

At this time, I was working part-time and going to school and shortly after our move the COVID-19 pandemic began. At first, things looked alright. My job went remote and her’s gave her two weeks paid time off. They created strict control over the situation, not letting customers into the store at all. But while I was working from home and doing zoom school, my ex started resenting me for the privilege of my situation. Resentment only grew, she hated I had support from my family that she lacked, she hated that I could work from home, she hated that I would spend days in our studio apartment focused on work and school and leisure and that for me all of those things were essentially confined to a desk. We spent two years in a studio apartment with resentment fermenting. I tried to be a good partner in every way that I knew how but the situation was already untenable by the time she shook me. Our sex life broke down.

We break up for the first time in July of 2021. I ask my friend to take me somewhere else, I negotiate my way into moving in. I regret not doing that now. I clutch a letter she wrote our first valentine’s day. One of three or four romantic gestures in our whole relationship. I was so starved for love and affection, her texting me asking if we were making a mistake, asking to see me made me crumble. I wanted to eat breakfast together and be okay. We agreed to reevaluate the relationship at the end of the lease. Our sex life never improves. The resentment is still there. But we’re happy to just go back to being comfortable. We can rely on each other. Everything works okay if we just trust each other. We really do love each other, even if we’re so mismatched, right? I tell myself it’s normal I have to fight her tooth and nail for her to tell me any reason she likes me.

We move again. We don’t move to the apartment I want, we move to the one she wants. Old fights flare up harder than ever. I try to address her needs so hard I break my arm. Stop being able to work on driving. She always wanted me to be driving. She leaves for home to see her family. Home is always not with me, I notice. My friend visits, she organizes a trip to Seattle with a third friend. When I go, this is the last straw. Sarah wanted to go to Seattle. We never made time. I’ve been working 40 hour weeks and so has she. We have shared as many days off as I can count on my hands. I didn’t plan a daytrip on any of them. This is the reason it ends. We fight and break up again.

She asks to go to couples therapy like my friend suggested months ago. I ask to think about it. My therapist reminds me this relationship has looked abusive to her for two years. I think about every time I had sex when I didn’t want to. I look at my body’s reaction to her, walking on eggshells, desperate for approval, afraid of her anger. I realize it has been too late for at least a year. It might have always been too late. I was a solution to a problem. My affection and desire were ego boosts. I bitterly think of her sucking the validation out of a man’s cock next time. I get upset with myself for the bitterness and anger that creeps in. I feel used and dirty. Everything hurts for a few weeks. We’re still living together. Ten Days left and I will never see her again. I don’t think I’m going to miss her.

#personal

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magnus-sm-writes · 2 months

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My Writing Journey: Currently

After university, I took a really shitty office job I hated and wrote a lot of angsty poetry. Some of it got accepted. I wrote a short story, “The Ghost You Left Behind”, and it was published in the graveyard zine. I got a lot of tattoos. Like, a lot of tattoos. I got really depressed. I did a lot of worldbuilding for Uuve and began transplanting my D&D characters into it. I visited my partner’s family in Las Vegas. Your typical postgrad shuffle.

2022 was the best year for me in terms of publishing. I actually have not been published in a long time, due to hitting a wall when it came to motivation to seek out publishers. That does not mean that I have not been producing work, though.

Dare I say that 2023 was one of my best writing years yet. I was writing for multiple fantasy projects at once. This was when a lot of them began to take shape. Tsarevna of the Horned Crown, Greenest, Double-Trickery, Of Valor & Honor, and the entirety of my Dragonworld stories began to really bloom. My characters became far more vibrant than I first wrote them as. They seemed to breathe on the page. The bonds they formed with each other felt organic and real. They made problems and solved them.

I worked at Starbucks and let my characters do their thing on the page. Writing fantasy was getting easier every day.

And I was beginning to get really weird with my poetry.

I love a weird poem. Love them. Solar Trauma is one of my favorite chapbooks ever written. Based on one of my favorite movies, The Thing, Solar Trauma actually inspired me to begin writing my own hivemind poetry. And it has been a love affair since then. I have actually submitted a few pieces for publication, which I am still waiting on answers for.

The most wild thing I did in 2023 was submit Body to a publisher for consideration.

Literally all year afterwards, I was checking my personal email non-stop. Every single day. I eagerly awaited a response.

That response was a rejection that came last month, but I am still amazed that I submitted Body at all. Yes, it gave me anxiety the entire time. So what? I still did it. I’m becoming more confident in sending my works to publishers, and that’s a huge accomplishment for the neurotic mess that is me.

My partner and I left our city life to move in with my parents for financial reasons, and shockingly, I have become even more productive with my writing since then. It might be that I finally have set hours (my 40 hour work week is a blessing), or it might be that I’m not constantly stressed about money, but I have finally been able to write the weird shit I’ve been needing to get out of my system.

I wrote several short stories in the tail end of 2023 and the beginning of 2024, as well as beginning to casually rewrite Hamish in February and even write a couple scenes of my Measure for Measure reimagining.

Something I didn’t expect was that I began to keep a writing journal! I’ve always loved the thought of journaling, but never stuck with it. Something about it was difficult for me. Especially bullet journaling the way people online do it. I couldn’t keep up with all the pretty pages and keep it practical. Little did I know that, if I just changed the format to value function over form, I could be incredibly productive with one.

I’ve been tracking my word counts, the books I’ve read, the books I want to read, the poems and short stories I’ve written, poems that inspire me, my habits, and general goals for each month. It has been so incredibly helpful for keeping me on track. I made a post about it, and holy shit, if you’ve ever wanted to keep a writing journal, please let this be your sign. It’s been one of the best impulse decisions I’ve made in a while.

Currently, I’m going with the flow when it comes to my writing. Doing what comes to me. I’ve taken a marked interest in the Donner party (to the point where I got the year they were rescued tattooed on me), so I’m considering doing something with that. I also want to write some more about zombies, and to continue my casual Hamish rewrite.

I think there are some fantastic things on the horizon for me. Not only has my writing grown in ten years; I have grown. I have become such a different person in all that time (thank fuck!), and I am so incredibly proud of how I’ve gotten better as a human being. I’m surrounding myself with people I love, doing things that make me happy (or at the very least improve my health/mental wellbeing). It’s been a fucking slog, and I’ve come out stronger.

Thank you everyone for coming along with me on my writing journey. If you have any questions you’d like me to answer, feel free to ask! This was a lot to get off my chest, and I’m feeling very nostalgic.

#magnus talks #my writing journey #writers on tumblr #on writing #magnus' golden birthday celebration

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akaraboonline · 1 year

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7 incredibly stupid issues that couples argue on

Perfect partnerships don't require complete agreement; instead, they require compromise and similar worldviews. They center on sharing fundamental principles, being really open to hearing what the other person has to say, and attempting to comprehend differences without passing judgment. That doesn't mean, though, that people in healthy relationships never argue. We all get into arguments from time to time, and as long as they're not too serious, I think that's good. So let's discuss the utterly silly arguments that couples frequently have.

1. “Where Do You Wanna Eat?”

7 incredibly stupid issues that couples argue on Nowadays, we have too many options, so picking a place to eat lunch or supper can easily turn into a pointless argument. Every corner is home to a café or restaurant, and they are all vastly different in terms of the food, furnishings, and ambiance. Determining just one is therefore quite difficult. Thus, after engaging in a 40-minute discussion about cafes, you finally decide to order pizza.

2. “What do you want for dinner?”

7 incredibly stupid issues that couples argue on Bringing up ordering at home. These days, takeout is so common that simply the inquiry "what do you want for dinner?" might cause anxiety. Do you recall the good old days when your only genuine ordering options were pizza or Chinese? Wasn't it great, by the way? Nowadays, you can order anything and have it delivered in 30 minutes or less, whether it be something as straightforward as pizza, sushi, Chinese food, mac & cheese, or as complex as a raw vegan gluten-free cuisine. And with so many choices, there are only 2 possible outcomes: order a little bit of everything, or order nothing at all.

3. “What to watch?”

Here's something amusing. Today, choosing a movie at the theater is simpler than deciding what to watch at home. Because when you go to the movies, you can sort of look at the 10–15 films that are playing and choose the one that appears most intriguing. You can choose from all of Netflix, Amazon, and Hulu at home. Leaving aside YouTube You could spend the entire evening scrolling through the alternatives, after all.

4. “Who is going to throw out the garbage?”

7 incredibly stupid issues that couples argue on Even though fighting over trash is absurd, we've all done it. To begin with, you must actually choose whose job it is, which is a small battle in and of itself. Because how do you choose who is the house's appointed trash collector? However, if you take turns, you'll inevitably forget who's turn it is when. And even once you've worked it out, you're still going to occasionally forget to do it, which leads to conflict. If there were some magical method to make trash vanish, everything would be so much simpler.

5. “Do I look fat?”

It used to be a common joke made about women, as if we were the only ones who occasionally felt that way. But nowadays, even males are asking themselves this issue. Thank you, media, for creating erroneous standards for everyone's physical appearance. The hardest part is that there isn't a simple response to the query "Do I look fat?" "Yes" is not an option. That would be incredibly impolite. You also cannot reply, "Pffft, no. The absurdity of that That gives it a disdainful appearance. Therefore, in order to win over the other person, you must either be careful with your words and compliments or get ready to battle.

6. “I’m fine.”

If there is one thing I am certain of in this world, it is that when someone claims to be OK, they are most definitely NOT fine, and a fight will eventually break out. Hearing those statements is similar to staring at a ticking time bomb.

7. Which way the toilet roll should hang

The most ludicrous justification for a fight is also the most frequent one. I can't even begin to count the number of times I've argued with someone about it or angrily changed the roll in someone else's bathroom. In fact, I'm fairly confident that the fact that my partner and I share this viewpoint is one of the reasons I am still in a relationship. I imagine we would always fight if we didn't. Read the full article

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pricklynoodle · 3 years

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real or not real

Itadori Yuji/Fushiguro Megumi pairing | Squid Game AU | Rated T | warning: implied character death | ANGST

( yes, writing instead of doing school lol, squid game ruined me so if you want to read this then be warned of SQUID GAME SPOILERS. There's no graphic death, but its sad as hell either way TT)

---

“The player who takes all ten marbles from your partner wins.”

Megumi had always kept to himself, never saying anything unless spoken to, never stuck to groups, and never took the choice to attach himself to something. Everything had an expiration date. Unnecessary things like friendships had never appealed to him. He only needed his sister, and it wasn’t like she had the choice to have him as her brother. But the fact that she still stuck around caring for him until she worked herself to a coma.

So honestly, it’s a surprise why he feels his heart drop when the announcement tells him he has to go against … whatever 310 is to him.

He hardly knows 310, and doesn't know anything about his life actually. Other than that he’s crazy strong, has an impressive pain tolerance, but also the loudest kid he’s ever met. He's always around him, sticking to Megumi like a persistent piece of gum stuck to his shoe. But he doesn't dislike him, but he can't say he's thrilled with him either.

But would Megumi kill him?

Stupid, he tells himself.

“Oh, fuck, I honestly didn’t see that coming,” 310 says with a grimace, looking at Megumi guiltily as if he was the cause of Megumi’s inner turmoil. He sits down on one of the stone benches. The whole setup was supposed to mimic a typical neighborhood, something Megumi wasn’t fortunate enough to grow up in. The bastards even made the effort to add in the sounds of cicadas from the fake trees, as if this was a completely normal summer for a couple of teens.

Megumi doesn’t say anything, he feels dizzy. He drops down to the bench, away from 310 as possible.

“I’ve always wanted to say this,” 310 says as he rests his elbows on his knees, looking at Megumi seriously, “This whole thing reminds me of Hunger Games.”

Megumi looks at him with furrowed brows.

“You know, Jennifer Lawrence?” 310 pushes. Megumi says nothing. “...Tall girl, big ass? The one with the arrows?”

“Can you shut the fuck up,” Megumi deadpans, then he shakes his head. He takes a deep breath, letting it out slowly. He counts to ten, then glances down at his hand. 10 marbles. “Just tell me how to play this game.”

“I don’t know either,” 310 admits, sounding sheepish. He shrugs carelessly, “This is more of the games my gramps used to play, but he was too busy being sick to teach me though.”

Megumi looks up at 310. He looks tired, but nostalgic. Like he was thinking of a good memory.

310 perks up, grinning at Megumi brightly, “though they said that we can make our own rules. I’ll think of something.”

Megumi nods solemnly. The silence stretches until 310 lets out an ‘aha!’.

“Let’s bet everything and just play one around,” 310 says, even dropping his fist down onto his hand as if it were the best idea ever.

Megumi freezes, staring at 310, was he going to trick him? He doesn’t even know him. They’re not friends. Of course, everything still is a death tournament at the end of the day.

310 seems to pick up Megumi’s reluctance, he jerks his head to the side. He points towards the pair of men competing against each other, looking frantic and panicked.Their faces are sheened with sweat, t-shirts drenched in sweat. It’s… it’s a pathetic sight.

“Fine,” Megumi relents. “What are we playing?”

“Calm down,” 310 chuckles, “are you that excited to kill me?”

Megumi stays quiet.

“We have a lot of time left,” 310 says breezily, pointing towards the timer mounted on the wall. “Let’s do it at the last minute.”

“What do you suggest we do till then?” Megumi asks with a scowl. “Sit nice and pretty, twiddle our thumbs and shove these marbles up our asses?”

“Jesus, man,” 310 laughs, “no just… talk.”

“Talk,” Megumi repeats.

“Talk,” 310 smiles, looking down at his hands. Megumi looks at them too. He remembers the hard calluses on them, when they shook hands. They’re thick and sturdy, and hold a lot of power. He really could have killed Megumi before, just wrap his hands around his neck and it’s all over.

Megumi also shakes away the filthy thoughts of what else those hands could do. Get a grip, Fushiguro.

“Things we couldn’t tell other people,” 310 says, smiling wistfully. “One of us is going to die here anyways.”

Megumi swallows the lump in his throat.

310 smiles wider. He’s always smiling, Megumi notes.

“There’s no reason to feel embarrassed if that’s the case,” 310 tells him, “I promise I won’t laugh when you blush like a tomato.”

“I don’t,” Megumi denies, but he can feel the heat already rising up to his cheeks.

“You do,” 310 says, “but I think it’s cute.”

Cute.

“So, uh, you have someone back home then?” 310 asks.

“Yeah,” Megumi says.

“...like a girlfriend or something?”

“Sister,” Megumi says quickly, “no...never a girlfriend. Impossible for me.”

“Ah, okay,” 310 says, nodding. “Just your sister?”

“I had a dad, but he … never came back.” Megumi confesses, “he was a shitty dad. He was never really home, but he gave us shelter and food. He had a bad temper, but he never hit us. He never liked to be around me especially. I … used to think he hated me.”

“What changed?” 310 asked.

“I… I became him. I understand why he did what he did,” Megumi says, fiddling with the sleeves of his jacket. “Doing dirty jobs, stealing, never at home. Hiding from danger. Hiding us from danger. Protection.”

310 nodded, he slid closer to Megumi. Thighs brushing. Silence continues.

“He came here,” Megumi says, looking up at the ceiling. It’s painted a pink-orange gradient, like a sunset. “I found half of that business card in one of his jackets. The last two digits were cut off. I dialed every possible number until I got here.”

“For what?” 310 asks.

“Find him,” Megumi says, “punch him. I would have killed him, I think, if I found out that he left us to rot. Then steal all his money to pay for my sister’s medical bills.”

“Oh, she’s sick?”

“Coma,” Megumi clarifies. “Some rich bastard from work hit her on her way home. He got off easy because of money.”

“I see,” 310 says, clenching his fists. “That’s terrible.”

“Yeah,” Megumi says gruffly.

“You’re still getting money though,” 310 says. He doesn’t say but you don’t get your dad back. “What would you do with it?”

Megumi doesn’t even hesitate, “pay for my sister’s medical bills. Buy a nice house for us to live in. A car, if I can.”

“If you can?” 310 says, “where would you drive your car?”

“school,” Megumi says simply. “I would use my car to drive to school.”

310 blinks. “You know, you can do much more with that 40 billion. You really don’t want anything else? Don’t have a destination?”

“I’d go to Sendai.”

“Wh—Sendai? I’m from Sendai. Are you kidding me? Are you going to drive there with a shiny new Toyota Yaris?”

Megumi blushes furiously, “enough about me, ugh, it’s your turn anyways.”

310 shakes his head, but he’s giggling like a schoolgirl. “You really have to think bigger. Have you ever been to the beach?”

“No,” Megumi says.

“You should, one that’s got nice soft sand and blue water. With palm trees too. And you should get piña coladas.”

“What?”

“C’mon man, you don’t get to be frugal with 40 billion. I’ll teach you how to splurge once we get out—”

Ah.

“Right,” 310 breathes out, laughing to himself all silly. “Only one of us leaves.”

Megumi grunts.

Silence.

“...Ever seen a dead body?” 310 asks.

“...I’ve been answering all these questions. You haven’t answered at all,” Megumi points out, feeling far too exposed for running his mouth.

“Ah you’re right! Uh, I don’t have anyone.”

“But your grandfather—”

“He’s dead. For a while now. My mom and dad. Also dead. My brother is on the run. He’s, uh, killed a lot of people. He got the death penalty, so yeah, haven’t really seen him around.”

Megumi looks at him.

“I don’t think he counts,” 310 says, scratching his face. Megumi realizes the scars on his face aren’t from the previous games. They looked healed, puckered and faded from time.“He looks a lot like me, though. A lot of people can’t tell us apart. He hated that. He’s only a bit taller than me, and he loves to brag about it. He has a huge ego.”

“I see.”

“Yeah,” 310 says, but he doesn’t look awkward about it. Just mildly inconvenienced. “Oh, have we really been talking for that long?”

Megumi looks at the time. They have less than 2 minutes.

310 stands up, swiping the dirt off his pants. He pats around for his marbles. “Okay, so you see that wall over there?”

Megumi nods mutely. It’s quite far, maybe around 2 meters.

“Okay, we throw one marble, and the one closest to the wall wins, okay?”

“Okay.” Megumi nods, easy enough.

“Okay, you go first.”

Megumi scowls.

“added rule, we do it together,” he says, jaw clenched.

“Eh?” 310 looks at him, confused.

“I’ve been doing things first, so it seems rather fair if we do it at the same time, with our best effort, okay? I have the blue marble, you get the red one.”

“... okay.”

“Don’t give me a weak ass toss, alright, that doesn’t count,” Megumi says gruffly, narrowing his eyes at him. “Do your best.”

310 nods, giving him a thumbs up. “Okay!”

“On three,” Megumi says.

“Okay!”

“Three.”

“Two,” 310 continues, positioning his arm.

“One,” Megumi does the same.

They both throw their marbles. Megumi’s heart leaps out of its chest as he watches his marble in the air.

Clack!

Megumi looks down on the marble that lands right next to his shoe.

It’s red.

“Ahh, shoot, I threw it too hard,” 310 says with a pout.

Megumi sees red.

He shoves 310 against the wall. “Are you fucking with me?”

“Whoa! No, you won f-fair and square, man,” 310 stutters. “I did my best shot, like you said!”

“Any idiot would know that shit would bounce right back if you threw it like that!”

310 laughs, “I must be some one of a kind idiot, then.”

Megumi shoves him further into the wall. “I’m gonna fucking kill you.”

“You can’t kill me if I’m gonna be dead anyways.”

“THEN I’LL KILL YOU IF YOU DIE.”

“See, that doesn’t really make sense—”

“Shut the fuck up! Why did you do that?!”

310 slumps against the wall, body lax. Not looking at him.

“Answer me!”

“You… you have a lot more to live for than me,” 310 says quietly. He looks up at Megumi, tears in his eyes, “what kind of asshole would I be to deny you for a life?”

“You have a life!” Megumi snaps.

“I don’t, not anymore,” 310 sobs, a wobbly smile on his face. “Before my grandfather died, he told me that I should help others. That when it was my time to go, I would die surrounded by others and not end up like him.

“I should use my strength to help others, that’s what I’ve been doing here. Out there, no one wants me to help them. No one wants the face of a killer to help them. No one wants me to be around them. I can’t go to places, I’ve… I’ve always hated what Sukuna did to me. Made me carry his sins, his crimes. The way people looked at me as if I was him. I can’t move forward, not like you.

“I… I never went to school either, y’know. Or I never graduated. When Sukuna became a wanted man, I became a target. I stayed in my room. The doors were locked. The curtains were always down. It was like this for years. I received no support. The only way I could get by was doing interviews with journalists, feeding the narrative. Making people hate Sukuna more, making them hate me more. That’s no way to live.”

Megumi felt the back of his eyes burn, his teeth aching from being clenched too tight.

“Even if...I had the money. I can’t erase what my brother did. I can’t erase my existence in the world. I would just keep doing the same thing everyday. I don’t… I don’t want a bigger house, not when it’s just me who lives there.”

“You and I are not so different,” he says, looking up at Megumi.. “I think that’s why… I want you to win. You get to experience all these normal things, and feel… happy. You have a chance.”

Megumi wipes his eyes harshly, “Shit.”

“That’s true.”

“... What’s your name?” Megumi asks.

“Itadori Yuji,” 310—no, Yuji says. “My name is Itadori Yuji.”

Megumi takes a shaky breath, he raises his hand for him. “Fushiguro Megumi.”

Yuji grins, he clasps his hand onto Megumi’s. “That means blessing, right?”

“I don’t fucking know.”

“I’m glad then, Megumi. That I’m friends with you even through this hell. That itself is a blessing in a disguise.”

“Shut up,” Megumi punches his shoulder.

A guard suddenly arrives, carrying a gun in his hand. Waiting.

Yuji looks behind Megumi’s head. “Ah, I wish we had more time.”

Megumi bites his lip. “I wish I’d… met you sooner. I don't know anything about you.”

Yuji jaw drops, “Okay, I’ll … summarize this in ten seconds! I’m twenty-years-old, my favorite color is green, my favorite manga is Bleach, my type is tall people with big butts! Uhh, I really like watching action films—”

“Not … whatever, nevermind,” Megumi says softly as he listens to Yuji ramble on about himself.

Yuji pauses from his ramble looking winded, “uhm, Fushiguro, can I hug you?”

Megumi freezes.

“I just haven’t had a hug in a long time—” Yuji trails off before he gets cut off with Fushiguro hugging him desperately, clinging to him.

“Idiot, idiot, idiot!”

“...Hey, Fushiguro Megumi, live a long life, okay?”

Megumi lets go.

He turns around.

Eyes burning as he stares unblinking down the path. Footsteps. Silence. Breathing. He feels something salty on his lips when he licks them. It's not sweat.

He... he got attached. He stares forward, he doesn't regret it. Not at all. He got to know Yuji Itadori, the real him, and the pain in his heart is the best he can give back. A reminder that he was more than what people saw him. Yuji Itadori didn't deserve what the world gave him, they did not deserve his cries. The fact that... no one would shed a tear for him.

...Ah.

Megumi notices the dark wet spots on the dirt.

“Thanks for playing with me.”

#my writing #itafushi #itadori yūji #fushiguro megumi #fushiita #squid game au #squid game spoilers #angst #fanfiction #im sorry everyone lol #it just broke me #i m gonna go lay down and cry now bye

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nanowrimo · 3 years

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How to Win NaNo with a 40-Hour Work Week

It seems like there’s never enough time as a writer, especially working full-time. Don’t worry though, as NaNo guest Brittany Bustos shares her secrets for managing NaNo and her 40-hour workweek:

I know there are many of us out there, people who love to write but spend forty hours of their week in an office, not being able to set aside time to work on their project. Thankfully, I’m lucky to have a wonderful support system at home and through trial and error, have created a list of tips for those who are curious about NaNoWriMo, but fear that their day job will mean they won’t have enough time.

1. Set aside a dedicated time to write.

This can be bright and early at 6 in the morning or as late as 10 at night. But make a dedicated time every single day of November to work. And try your hardest to use that time for only NaNo. Emily from the LA region uses an alarm as a reminder to write every day, and I think that is a great idea to keep yourself accountable. Even if your workday is stressful and busy, set aside time to write. It might even be that stress reliever you needed after a long day.

2. Try sprinting to get a lot of words in a little time.

Sprinting in writing is similar to how you picture a runner sprinting - it’s when you write continuously, as much as you can in a set amount of time. You go fast. I’ve written over 500 words in 15 minutes during a sprint. You’re probably thinking to yourself, “But how can I process thoughts when I’m focused on typing?” And truthfully, you don’t. You let your stream of consciousness put the words on the page. And try as hard as you can to ignore the backspace button. Your focus is to get words on a draft, editing can come later!

3. Try and come prepared with a general plan of what you're going to work on.

When you are fishing for time to write, there’s not much time to sit and think. If you are a planner or pantser or somewhere in between, I encourage you to jot down your “game plan” for what you are going to work on after a session of writing so that you can easily jump into your project the next day.

4. “Get out of your head. Don’t overthink it, don’t ponder and stew. Write.” -- Julie, ML, Los Angeles region.

I love this advice from one of my community friends to round out this list. At the end of it all, November is a time to draft. Not draft and hope it’s ready for publication in December. Just draft. You don’t have a lot of time to think or reconsider, you need to get all of your ideas out now. Once November ends, you can do whatever you please in terms of editing and finishing, but your ultimate goal for November is to write 50,000 words and have some fun along the way. So if you are writing a sentence but second guessing if it truly belongs, then come back to it another time and add those words as a part of your goal for the month.

There you go! Four tips that will help you win NaNoWriMo with a busy schedule. I know it might sound daunting, but NaNoWriMo has helped me so much with relieving stress after a long workday, I couldn’t imagine a month without it. And if you are unsure if you will make the time, reach out to your region’s MLs to find a write-in that works well with your schedule.

Brittany Bustos (@helloimbea) is a writer from the California, East Bay region. She has participated in NaNo since 2019 and loves to write Young Adult and Romance. She has previously published poetry and plays through academic and local publications. When not participating in NaNoWriMo and Camp NaNoWriMo, she is constantly reading (to find out what she reads you can follow her Bookstagram @brittmariereadshere) and spending time with her partner and cat, Princess Peach.

Top Photo by Brett Jordan on Unsplash

#nanowrimo #writing #amwriting #by nano guest #brittany bustos #Time Management

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lettersiarrange · 3 years

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Covid things I can't believe I'm still saying:

Masks are ONLY effective when everyone is wearing them, everyone is at least 6 feet apart, and no one is exhaling forcefully

If one person isn't wearing a mask, there is a risk

If everyone is wearing a mask but you're only 5 ft apart, there is a risk

If everyone is wearing a mask and you're 6 feet apart but one person is shouting/singing/panting with exertion, there is a risk (your breath travels farther when exhaling forcefully, more distance is required)

Your mask needs to be FULLY on and ready to go before you leave your house/car

Not "I'll put it on when I get inside". Not "there won't be anyone at the park so I don't need it". Not "I'll slip it on in the parking lot." Unless you literally have a forcefield, there is a reasonable chance you will encounter someone before your mask is fully on, unless it is fully on 100% of the time you are in public

Children can still carry and spread covid. No, it is not acceptable for children to run around maskless in any public spaces, outdoor or otherwise

You can still get covid outdoors!!! The risk is somewhat lower but still very present.

You can test negative for covid while actively contagious. Most tests have a solid percentage of false negatives, and even if the test is working perfectly, it's best able to identify you as positive once you've started showing symptoms

It can take up to 14 days for symptoms of covid to appear. You are still contagious before your symptoms appear.

You could catch covid on a Monday, take a test Wednesday (while covid positive and contagious) and test NEGATIVE, then start showing symptoms on Sunday, and by the time you finally test positive the next Wednesday, you've exposed a week and a half's worth of people

This is why it's imperative that if you think you've been exposed to covid, you self-isolate for a full 14 days regardless of symptoms or test results

You can still be contagious even if you NEVER show symptoms of covid

Covid doesn't clock out because you're eating. Covid doesn't clock out because you're at the dentist. Covid doesn't clock out because you have a really, really, really good reason for taking off your mask. If your mask is off, or someone else's mask is off in a space you are occupying, there is a risk

Your best friend can give you covid. Your mom can give you covid. Your partner can give you covid. Your grandma can give you covid. The people in your life are not magically immune to infecting you just because you love and trust them. Unless you know with absolute certainty they have only interacted with people who have only interacted with them, there is a risk

I know it's inconvenient, but you really should not touch your mask, like at all. You shouldn't touch the front of your mask, because it may have effectively stopped covid from touching your face, and now that's all over your fingers, which are then all over your phone... you get the picture. You shouldn't touch the inside of your mask, because if you've touched anything with covid, you're now putting that right next to your nose and mouth. You shouldn't take your mask on and off, because while it's off, the inside may become exposed to covid. If you take your mask off, you really ought to put a new, clean mask back on. You really ought to wash your hands before putting your mask on and before taking it off, and you should only handle the straps. Do not wear a mask someone else has directly touched.

40% of grocery workers have caught covid

You can catch covid from surfaces. The risk is low, but present.

Masks with vents do not filter the air going out of them, making them completely useless at protecting other people from your potentially asymptomatic covid+ self. Masks are primarily worn to protect other people from the wearer, and just have the added benefit of providing a small amount of protection to the wearer, but a vented mask is effectively pointless.

The longer someone stays in one spot, the more saturated the air around them gets with their breath. This is why activities that involve staying in one spot with a bunch of people for a significant period of time are especially dangerous. See: concerts, church, bars, restaurants, spectator events, etc. Things become more risky if people are singing, laughing, talking loudly, screaming, exercising. Again, your breath travels further. A situation where everyone is moving around (calmly) is less risky.

If you have long hair, public health experts reccomend wearing it up while in public to reduce surface area upon which the virus could stick. (Consider how close your hair is to your face, and it's presence at the same height as everyone else's heads/mouths/breath. There is less concern about your jeans getting in your eyes/mouth or being coughed on by someone covid+).

Do not take your mask off to speak. Do not wear your mask below your nose. Do not reuse disposable masks (and ideally invest in a washable and reusable mask that you wash between every single use. Or don't even invest in one-- many places are giving them out for free.)

Just an "america is a capitalist hellscape" protip from someone who got charged $318 for a "free" covid test-- do NOT go to a privately owned healthcare provider for a test, and double check to see if there's a "*with most insurance" attached to that free test

Just because someone tells you a public space is safe to be in, does not mean it is safe. Think to yourself: does this person/organization benefit financially from me being in this space? Restaurants want your money. Airlines want your money. Stores want your money. They will do the absolute bare minimum necessary to follow any laws that might be in place and make their business seem appealing. This does not actually mean they care about your health or are actively protecting it. Ask yourself: do I trust these employees with my life? Do I trust the management of this company with my life? If I were working this job for minimum wage 40 hours a week, would I be taking every single precaution possible, for every single customer, every single time, on top of my regular duties, especially if management didn't require it?

Unfortunately, "people who benefit from you being in a public space but don't necessarily give a shit about your individual health" include politicians and governments. Just because spaces are legally open, does not mean they are safe. Just because the mayor/governor/president/prime minister says it's safe does not mean that it is

I'm not trying to suggest everyone is out to get you and you should be suspicious of everything, I just want everyone to use the factual, scientific information we have about covid to evaluate a situation and determine on their own, using science and logic, if a situation is safe. Because unfortunately, things other people say, even ones in positions of authority, are not always based on science or logic, as we should all know well by now.

Please add your own info or correct me if I've gotten anything wrong

*Bolding is to make the wall of text easier to read and does not correspond with importance

#covid #covid 19 #covid-19 #coronavirus #corona #covid19 #coronavid19

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slugtranslation-hypmic · 3 years

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Hey slug, thanks for the hard work you and your team do for the fandom!! me and some friends were discussing this and i thought it would be nice to see ur answer to this (only if it doesn't bother u, of course!!): what characters do you think parents would give a big thumbs up if you introduced them as your partner (in terms of personality and traits)? I personally think Hifumi or Ichiro would be the best son-in-law...

What an entertaining question. Believe it or not, I’ve given the matter some thought before for reasons entirely unrelated to this, so presenting: Hypnosis Microphone Men and Whether or Not You Should Bring Them Home to Your Parents.

Since there’s a wide age range among the cast members, assume that the “you” in question is roughly each character’s age.

Ichirou: Absolutely. This man is objectively a dream boat. Runs his own successful business? Check. Respectful to people of all ages? Check. Cooks? Check. Cleans? Check. Good with kids? Check. Take Ichirou and marry him before your parents marry him themselves.

Jirou: As far as high school boyfriends go, Jirou’s not a bad choice. He’s a sweetheart, popular, plays music. Doesn’t do drugs in the school bathroom. Could have better grades, but hey, you can’t win them all. He seems like he’d have you home by 8 pm. You know what? Sure. Why not? You could do worse.

Saburou: Saburou is the kind of middle school boyfriend that your parents openly like and privately dislike. What I mean is that he’s very polite to most elders and super smart, so he’s the kind of kid who is entirely unobjectionable, but he’s also the kind of kid who would try to mansplain your parents’ jobs to them. Worst of all, he would be entirely correct in what he’s saying. Your parents probably want to punch him, but they don’t because assaulting children is illegal, not to mention immoral. They will breathe a collective sigh of relief when he finally breaks up with you so he can focus on studying for the Science Bowl nationals.

Samatoki: I am so torn on this one. On the one hand, he’s every parent’s worst nightmare. He smokes indoors, has an awful temper, and is a fucking gangster, for pete’s sake. Yet he can also be a sweetheart who cooks for you and does everything to treat you right. I’m really stumped. Probably the best solution, if you’re really wanting to get in on that Aohitsugi ass, is to cut out the middle man and date Nemu instead. She is perfect in every way, so your parents will love her.

Juuto: If your parents watch Antiques Roadshow, then he will have a lot to bond with them about. Otherwise I think he’d be that kind of person who tells stories about himself way too loudly at family dinners, and after he leaves, one of your parents pulls you aside to say, “Your boyfriend’s really kind of an asshole, don’t you think?” I guess date him if you’re okay with your parents thinking you have cruddy taste.

Riou: I feel like the hard part here is luring him out of the woods and into a family dinner, but from there, it should go great. He’s over 6 feet tall. He can cook well. He has a strong sense of purpose and knows what he wants to do in life. Most importantly, he has a wonderful heart AND every survival skill known to man. He will change the oil in your parents’ car, fix the leaky pipe you’ve been meaning to get around to for six months now, clean the hood above the stove, and then swap recipes and heartfelt compliments with whichever parent does the cooking. Who cares if he doesn’t have a stable income? You don’t need that with guns like those. (insert flexing Riou image here)

Ramuda: I’m trying to think about the concept of a) dating Ramuda and b) introducing him to a set of parents, and I’m drawing an utter blank. There is nothing but “???” in my mind. I’m going to hazard a guess that this one would be a terrible idea.

Gentarou: Wow, your parents had no idea you were dating a prince of a tiny little kingdom in the Mediterranean AND a Harvard law graduate AND the winner of the Nobel Peace Prize AND the man who discovered a cure for cancer in an expedition deep into the heart of the Amazon rain forest. Look at you! What a catch. Only attempt this if your parents are gullible.

Dice: As much as I love Dice to death, this one is a no. Your parents do not want you dating a homeless man with a gambling addiction and bad table manners. Plus, the MIL here seems hard to get along with. Nuh-uh.

Jakurai: Absolutely. You’re in your 30s, so your parents are at least middle-aged. Probably they have some joint problems or some back pain. Jakurai can let them kiss that pain goodbye, and in return, they can let him kiss you! A win-win. He also boasts a handsome salary, has a lovely house, and seems like he’d be super respectful in a relationship. Yes. Go. Marry him.

Hifumi: If you’re a girl, you’re probably going to have to sit this round out. If you’re a guy or nonbinary... yeah, you’re probably going to have to sit this round out too. See, if you have a mom, how is Hifumi supposed to meet her? I guess you could... idk... stick a lampshade on her head and expect him not to notice. That could potentially work, but it’d raise a few awkward questions. If you do happen to live in a female-free household, though, you’ve hit upon the golden opportunity to make this man yours. You can replace every instance of the word “wife” in Judy Brady Syfer’s famous essay “I Want a Wife” with the word “Hifumi” and still have it make perfect sense, and it shows.

Doppo: I can’t in good conscience recommend this one. Sure, he’s hardworking and certainly polite enough, but does he have the time to respond to your emotional needs? Hell, does he have the time to respond to his own? If you invited him to family dinner, there’s a good chance that he’d need to work overtime and miss it. He’d apologize and buy you flowers to make up for it, but you know he’d also be worrying about the cost of those flowers, so... is it really worth it?

Kuukou: For some reason, my parents actually like Kuukou (although I think he’s also the only character they know besides Ichijiku), but I don’t think this would hold true for most parents. He sounds good on paper, but he’d probably make a disparaging comment about someone’s ass in the first five minutes. Perhaps if you tape his mouth shut and tell your parents he’s doing a vow of silence, then yes.

Juushi: As far as high school (is he still in high school?) boyfriends go, Juushi’s not that bad either. He’s shy but sweet. Respectful. In a band, but the kind that makes money and doesn’t operate out of someone’s garage. Yeah, you know what? Go for it. You could do worse. Just scroll up on this list if you need proof of that.

Hitoya: Yeah, absolutely. Hitoya has a great career and a fantastic attitude. He doesn’t take shit from anyone but can still be polite in the correct contexts. He also seems like the type who would get into a serious relationship and treat his partner right. Fuck it up. I support your love.

Sasara: Yes. He has the exact type of humor favored by parents of the father variety. Plus, he’s a famous comedian. There is good money to be had right there.

Roshou: Absolutely. Rather shy but very talented, hardworking teacher who obviously puts his heart and soul into his job? Of course. As long as he doesn’t death glare your parents, it will work out fantastically. Plus, he can talk about sports! That’s a thing that parents like, right?

Rei: Absolutely not. You remember last May when your parents answered a call from the IRS telling them they were about to lose all their money unless they gave the nice man on the phone their bank account password right at that very instant? He was the nice man on the phone. Why the hell would you bring this threat into your parents’ home? Look, you’re in your mid-40s. Your parents are getting up in years, and they want to see you settle down and be happy with someone. I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but this is not it. Why are you with Rei in the first place? Is it the fur coat? Listen, you are a grown-ass adult, and you can buy yourself as many fur coats as you want. I believe in you. It doesn’t have to be this way - you deserve better.

#not a translation #asks

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queenofspades20 · 3 years

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Birthday Boy

Happy birthday to my favorite fictional boyfriend. Just some fluff in honor of Bucky’s birthday.

Word count: 2k

Warnings: this is just fluff, maybe a few curse words. Enjoy!!

_____________________________________________________

Bucky and Y/n were sitting on the couch watching Hot Tub Time Machine.

“I’m telling you, Buck. The douchey ski patrol guy looks just like you!” Y/n insisted. Every time the actor popped up on the screen, Bucky just shook his head.

“I don’t see it, Doll.”

“Then you need glasses, old man!”

“Old man?” Bucky’s head snapped in Y/n’s direction. He had an incredulous look on his face. “You weren’t calling me old man last night.”

“Not my fault you’re going blind, Babe. Sebastian Stan is clearly your doppelganger. Your younger doppelganger,” Y/n said with a smirk, putting emphasis on younger. She knew she was picking a battle with Bucky but she wanted to see how far he would let her go before putting an end to it.

Bucky knew what she was up to. He loved seeing her smile, even if it was at his expense, but he was only going to let her go so far.

“I see how it is.” He leaned over and pushed her to lay down, climbing on top of her. Bucky grabbed her hands and pinned them above her head with his metal hand, his flesh hand moving down her sides, tickling her.

“Bucky, NO!” Y/n yelled out. “I was just teasing. With your birthday tomorrow, I gotta get my shots in while I can! You know I can’t help myself.” She squirmed her body, trying to move away.

Bucky shifted so his legs were on either side of Y/n’s, effectively trapping her. He started tickling her sides.

“NO! BUCKY!!” Y/n tried to pull her body away, but he was too heavy on top of her.

“I’ll show you old man.” While tickling her, he started kissing her face and neck. They were laughing, Y/n trying to desperately get away from Bucky’s hand, when Bucky felt cold water hitting his back.

“HEY!” Bucky yelled, turning around. He saw Sam and Steve standing there, laughing.

“I had to cool you off,” Sam said. He held up an empty glass and shook it. “No sex on the couch.”

Bucky let go of Y/n and got up to run after Sam. “Get over here, Birdbrain.”

Sam took off running to his room with Bucky close behind him.

Y/n looked at Steve. “He was tickling me because I called him old man. But he refuses to acknowledge he looks like the actor in Hot Tub Time Machine!”

The movie was at a scene with Blaine, the character Y/n was referring to. She pointed to the screen and Steve looked.

“I don’t see it.” Steve shrugged and walked off.

“Argh! Thor save me from old men who need glasses!”

The next morning, Y/n got up before Bucky to cook him breakfast. She had a day planned of doing activities Bucky loved. She made pancakes, bacon, and eggs with some coffee and loaded up a tray with the food. She made her way back to their shared room. Bucky was not in bed, but she could hear him in the bathroom.

“Doll?” Bucky called out.

“I have breakfast. I was hoping you’d still be in bed, or did I not tire you out?” Y/n cheekily answered.

Bucky stuck his head through the doorway. “I thought I had tired you out.”

Y/n just rolled her eyes. “Get out here, birthday boy, so I can give you your first present.”

Bucky quickly made his way over to the bed. “Breakfast with you is a good present.”

He settled onto the bed and Y/n placed the tray over his lap. “A hearty breakfast to get through the morning, because we’re going on a little trip.”

Bucky looked intrigued. “Are you going to tell me where?”

“Nope. I did think we could take your bike, since it’s a gorgeous day out.”

“You know how to drive a motorcycle? And who said I would be okay with you driving my bike?”

“One, rude. Two, I got lessons from Steve. I can get us to where we are going no problem. I even did a test drive with Steve a few days ago.”

Bucky looked impressed. “I still don’t know.”

Y/n looked at Bucky with a pout. “Please, Baby? I promise I know what I’m doing and I really want this to be a surprise.”

Bucky hesitated. He had a hard time saying no to her but he also loved his bike. “Fine, but if you seem hesitant at all, we pull over and switch.”

“Deal!” Y/n smiled widely. “Now dig in, Baby.”

They ate their breakfast and then got dressed for the day. As they made their way to the garage, Y/n held up a blindfold.

“You’re not wearing that while driving,” Bucky joked.

Y/n gave him an unimpressed look. “You’re wearing it first. I want this to be a surprise. I’ll wear it later if you’re a good boy, though. Let you do whatever you want.”

Bucky felt his pants get tighter. “Careful, Doll. Keep talking like that and we won’t make it out of the compound. But I’m going to hold you to that later,” he said as he took the blindfold.

They settled on the motorcycle and Bucky put the blindfold on. “Can you see anything, Bucky?”

“Nope.”

“Okay then. Hold on.” Y/n started the motorcycle and Bucky wrapped his arms around her waist.

They took off. It was a weird feeling for Bucky to not know where they were going, but he trusted Y/n. After a while, Bucky felt the bike slow down. He could hear crowds and screams of joy in the background. After the bike was stopped, Y/n looked over her shoulder.

“You can take off the blindfold now.”

Bucky slipped of the blindfold and smiled when he saw they were at Coney Island.

“Good surprise?” Y/n asked and bit her lip.

“Best surprise.” Bucky hugged her close.

“Good. I wanted you to have fun and not worry about the world and this seemed to fit what I wanted.”

“It’s perfect.” Bucky got off the bike and helped Y/n off.

They spent their morning at Coney Island, riding everything they could and playing several games. Y/n made sure to win a stuffed bear for Bucky. Bucky really enjoyed the Cyclone and regaling Y/n with the story of how he made Steve ride it back in the day. They had lunch and then decided to finish their visit with the Wonder Wheel. At the top of the ride, they shared a kiss.

“Good birthday so far?”

“Best I think I’ve ever had.” Bucky looked at Y/n like she hung the moon.

“Ready to head back to the compound? The team has a small party planned for you.”

Bucky had a hesitant look on his face.

Y/n rushed to assure him. “Nothing like Tony’s usual parties. It’s just the team and significant others. We want to celebrate you turning 104.”

Bucky looked relieved. “That’s fine. As long as you promise to not leave my side all night.”

“Like I would leave you anyways.”

Bucky and Y/n made their way back to the bike. Bucky immediately got on and looked at Y/n. “I’m driving back. You did a good job but I wanna drive.”

Y/n laughed and climbed behind Bucky, wrapping her arms around his waist. “I figured you’d want to drive back. I only cared about surprising you here. And maybe after the party.”

Bucky reached down and squeezed her hands. “I love you.”

“Love you too, Bucky.”

They made their way back to the compound and got ready for the party. Y/n put on a deep red knee-length dress that fit her body in a way that showcased all her favorite assets. She kept her hair and makeup simple, since the party wasn’t going to be crazy. She made her way out of the bathroom and saw Bucky buttoning up his shirt. He looked up as she walked in to grab her shoes. As she passed him, he grabbed at her hand and pulled her close.

“You look delectable,” Bucky murmured. He leaned down and brushed his lips against hers. His arms slid around her waist, his hands moving down until they cupped her ass. Y/n smiled at Bucky and put her arms around his neck.

“Glad you like. I bought the dress just for tonight.”

“So, another present for me? I don’t know how I’m going to keep my hands off you.”

“Well, that is a perk of it being your party. We go for a while and then leave early and you can unwrap me and put that blindfold to use.”

Bucky groaned. “Can’t we just skip the party?”

Y/n threw her head back and laughed. “No. You know they’ll just barge in here. If we make an appearance, then we won’t be interrupted later.”

“Fine.” Bucky grumbled. He pouted as they left their room and made their way to the common area where the party was set up. Bucky was hoping if he pouted enough, Y/n would let him leave extra early.

“Your pouting isn’t going to work, Baby.” Y/n said over her shoulder, smiling.

Bucky gave up the pout and smiled back. “Worth a shot.”

When they entered the room, it was filled with the team and their partners. Steve had brought Sharon, who was happy to have made it in time, having been on a mission for the past few weeks. Clint and Natasha stood together, Clint’s arm around Natasha’s shoulder. Wanda and Vision were holding hands. Bruce had excitedly brought Betty Ross, who had recently come back into his life. Sam and Peter stood with their girlfriends and Tony and Pepper were happily hugging.

“Happy birthday, Bucky!” everyone yelled as Bucky and Y/n entered the room. Bucky felt so happy to be surround by his friends. Tony and Steve had hung up a banner that said “happy 104th birthday” and there were streamers all around the room. On the coffee table was a cake with a pile of presents for Bucky. Tony had set up a bar to the side, fully stocked with a bartender there to make everyone’s night easier. Though Thor couldn’t stay, he had dropped off some Asgardian mead for the super soldiers earlier that week. There was also a buffet table with various foods that Bucky loved, both from back in the 40s and from now.

The party had been going for a few hours and everyone was having a good time. Bucky and Steve had gotten into the mead and were feeling its effects. Bucky had opened his presents, loving everything he got, especially his new knife from Y/n.

“Doll, you already did breakfast and Coney Island. This is too much,” Bucky said as he admired the tactical knife. It had a black and blue carved handle with a steel blade that had a blue sheen.

“I saw it and thought of you,” Y/n said with a shrug. “The blade reminds me of your eye color.”

Bucky leaned over and gave her a kiss on the cheek. “I can’t wait to use it on my next mission.”

“Only you would be that excited for a knife,” Sam said with a laugh.

“Shut it, Pigeon.”

Sam just rolled his eyes with a smile. After presents were done and the cake was eaten, Bucky decided he was ready to finish his night in the bedroom with Y/n, wanting to make use of the blindfold. He looked over at Y/n and caught her eye. Bucky gave her a smirk that signaled he was ready to go.

“Well, thank you everyone for a truly great birthday. I can’t thank you enough for everything.”

“You deserve it, Punk,” Steve said, Sharon cuddled into his side.

“Definitely my best birthday yet.” Bucky pulled Y/n close and kissed her temple.

Y/n smiled, ready to start trouble. “I think that’s my cue to get this old man to bed.”

Everyone laughed while Bucky looked down at her in faux shock. “Old man??”

Y/n laughed as she stood up. “I mean, you are 104. I’m surprised you lasted this long.” She slowly made her way over towards the door. “Do we need to get you a cane or maybe a walker?”

Bucky jumped up and moved quickly towards Y/n. She let out a yell and ran towards their room. “I’ll show you old man, Doll,” Bucky yelled out as he chased her.

Everyone heard Y/n yell, “bring it on, senior citizen!”

Sam looked at Tony. “Thank you for soundproofing their room.”

“That was a present for all of us.”

#Bucky Barnes #bucky barnes x reader #bucky x reader #bucky x y/n #Happy birthday Bucky Barnes #birthday boy #just wanted some fluff

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donutloverxo · 4 years

Text

Nude

Run through - Steve wants to try new things so he takes a painting class with a nude painting subject. Only the woman he has to paint are you, Peppers assistant and his crush.

Pairing - Steve Rogers x reader

Word count - 2k

Masterlist is linked in the bio!

Steve Rogers was many things. He was an artist, an amateur cook (who really does try), a loyal friend, a good citizen, a soldier. Yet when people looked at him, they only ever saw the captain. His friends called him cap. He'd go weeks without hearing his own name. Sometimes he felt the lines were blurred. When did Steve Rogers end and Captain America begin?

He had a big wake up call when he confronted Tony, saying he wasn’t iron man, it was an alter ego. To which Tony said that Steve was basically captain America. And Steve couldn’t argue or disagree, because it was true. He didn’t want to lose himself in his work anymore than he already had. His therapist told him to make healthy boundaries, which is what he’s going to do.

So he ordered some colors and pencils online and got to work on his art, for the first time in a long time. It was exhilarating and freeing. He could lose himself in it, go on for hours without thinking and seeing anything but the colors and his canvas. Which was extremely rare for him. He could rarely ever shut his brain off or run from his traumatic memories.

Everyone could see the visible change in him. How he seemed happier. Clint even joked about it saying

“Cap must be getting some”

To which Steve only snorted. There was no room for anything as complicated as a relationship or sex in his life, not right now.

But wouldn’t it be nice? To have a woman to hold and to paint. To love and care for. He didn’t let himself delve too much into that fantasy. Because even if it was a nice escape once in a while, he knew that while Steve Rogers might make a good partner, Captain America would certainly not. He would never subject any woman to deal with either of them.

With some encouragement from Sam and his old friends he started attending painting classes at his alma mater, the Brooklyn College, every Saturday evening. It helped him make some friends. He didn’t know if he could call them friends. Most of them were too different from him. They seemed like different types of 'tortured artists'

When he heard that there would be a nude subject to paint the next class, he was a little bit hesitant. Such a thing would’ve been scandalous in the 40s. But he was trying to open himself up and that meant pushing his comfort zone, even just a little bit.

When he set up his canvas, oil colors and brushes that Saturday he expected male subject. He didn’t however expect to hear a woman’s voice. He was too focused on his set up to look up, whatever. He didn’t care if it was a man or a woman. There wouldn't be anything erotic about it. This was strictly professional and educational.

He looked up to take a good look at his subject, when he felt as if his soul was knocked out of him. There you stood, his crush, Pepper Potts' assistant, and the woman who turned him down.

“You know back in my day they used to play elevator music” He said to drown out the awkward silence. Even after all this time, he still didn’t know how to talk to women. He had had a crush on you since the moment he laid eyes on you. You were always so funny and sweet. Asking him and everyone about their day, if they were doing well. Always willing to help others.

When he let it slip that he likes banana bread, you baked him a whole loaf of it, which chocolate chips so ‘so you think of me when you have them. They’re my signature of sorts' you had said proudly. Of course he’d be thinking of you when he ate it. Overthinking actually. Wondering If you like him as he likes you, or if you’re just being your sweet self.

“Oh we still have that!” You chirped “but not in um professional or business buildings like these”

He just nodded. Tapping his foot impatiently. You would get off in just six floors it was now or never. “Hey uh – what are you doing this Friday?” he asked shyly.

“Oh just watching some Gordon Ramsay with my dog probably. I have no life” you laughed at your own self depreciating joke “Why?” you tilted your head.

“I was thinking, maybe we could get dinner? Only if you uh – you wanted to, you're free to say no” he promised. Maybe he should’ve asked you to ‘hang out' or 'for a coffee' like most people these days. But he felt that was no way to treat a lady, especially one like you.

“Oh Steve” he was already disappointed upon hearing your tone “I would’ve loved to. But even though we don’t work together, it wouldn’t look good you know? I mean I don’t care much for 'my image'” You said making air quotes “But I don’t, it’ll be complicated” You looked completely defeated. As if it hurt you to say no more than it hurt him to hear it.

“I completely understand” He nodded “no hard feelings” he gave you a smile as he watched you walk away. It did break his heart a bit, but he’d respect your feelings.

He looked at you taking off your satin robe revealing your bare body to the class of twenty or so artists. His breathe hitched. Your hair flowing down your back and covering a bit of your left breast, your soft stomach and thighs, the patch of soft curls at your core, your nipples hard against the chilly air, and how your stomach rolled a bit as you sat uncomfortably on the stool. You were beautiful. A work of art even. There was absolutely no way he could do you justice. He started drawing an outline on his canvas. You would very well be his best subject.

You looked around a bit, your fingers holding onto the stool for dear life so you could stave off the anxiety and feeling of being so exposed. Then your eyes landed on him. You thought you were dreaming, maybe you didn’t see properly, so you did a double take. Then you were frozen on the spot. There he was, Captain Rogers, the first Avenger, the man you often dreamt about, sitting right in front of you while you were naked as the day you were born.

You had no idea what you should do. This was literally like a nightmare come true. If you flee it would look bad, if you didn’t it might look worse. You decided you’d follow his lead. So you peeked a glance at him from the corner of your eyes and saw him, sketching you? Holy shit Steve Rogers was drawing a nude portrait of you. What has your life become?

You had always been insecure about your body. You knew magazines, porn and movies were meant to feed people lies to get them to buy more things. That didn’t make you feel any less bad about not looking anything like the women in them. You tried to remind yourself that you have many things going for you. Like your supporting family, your loving friends, your cute labrador, your amazing job.

Speaking of your job, exactly why you turned Steve freaking Rogers down! A man that looks like him asking you out and you say no. Your friends flat out laughed in your face at your unfortunate predicament, where the cake is right there but you can't eat it. Now that you thought about it, it was funny.

Your co-workers weren’t kind to you. Even on your best day you didn’t look anything like the women you worked with, who would stab you in the back the first chance the get. You were kind to everyone, but you knew by now not to expect the same treatment back. Which was why you had to say no to the beefy blonde. You didn’t want to be branded as the ‘office slut’.

Which now you were sure you would be. You didn’t know Steve enough to know he’d be willing to keep this a secret. He didn’t seem like someone who would do that to you. But you still couldn’t help but think the worst.

You squirmed and shivered in the chair for a good part of the next two hours. By the end your back was sore and you did everything you could to avoid looking at Steve, only sneaking glances here and there, while he seemed too engrossed in his work.

You had done this a couple of times before, to accept your body for what it is and get comfortable with it. If you weren’t going to love it no one would do it for you. Finally the time was up and the artists were asked to pack up for the day.

You quickly got up from your stool putting the robe back on. You turned your back to Steve, stretching your muscles. You couldn’t wait to lay down on your comfy bed and just get out of here. But you knew you needed to have that inevitable conversation. You probably would never be able to look Steve in the eye after this.

You walked towards him as he was cleaning up his work station. “Fancy seeing you here” You cringed at your embarrassing attempt at a British accent.

“Hey there” He gave you a bashful smile scratching the back of his head “I didn’t expect to see you here”

“Right back at ya” you returned his smile, no longer feeling on edge. It was strange how his presence served to comfort you.

“You do this often” he asked casually. You couldn’t really hear any judgement in his tone, not what you would expect from a hundred year old.

“No not really. It just uh – I’m trying to love myself. Which I already do! Of course” you let out a nervous chuckle “just trying new things and stepping out of my comfort zone”

“That makes two of us” he said as he was done packing his bag, which he was deliberately doing at a slow pace. He didn’t want to leave. Not yet.

“Can I... Look at your painting?” You asked nervously. You didn’t know if you wanted to see his interpretation of your naked body, what if it was bad? But what if it was good? What if he was impressed by you...

“Uh it’s not done yet. And frankly I’m not that good”

“I seriously doubt that. I’ve seen the sketches in your office” You caught your slip of tongue. You couldn’t let him know about your borderline unhealthy obsession with him.

“Well, have a look then” he relented showing you his canvas.

You let out a breathe you didn’t even know you were holding at the painting. It was breath-taking. The woman looked like you, but why was she so beautiful and graceful? In the painting she was sitting on a stool, like you, in front of a tree admiring a rose in her hand. She was naked as well. It reminded you of classic Greek paintings where women weren’t perfect, but were celebrated for their imperfections.

“It’s amazing Steve. I – do I look like that?” You stammered not being able to tear your eyes off the painting.

He shook his head at your shock “On the contrary you look much better I’m glad you like it”

“You’re a great artist” you gushed

“I don’t know about that. I’ve seen much better” he said humbly.

You would argue with him. But you knew it would be of no use. Looking at the beautiful woman in the painting gave you the surge of confidence you needed “Steve, does the offer for that dinner still stand?” You straightened your back looking up to lock eyes with him.

“Yes” He blurted without even thinking “how about tomorrow evening?” He asked.

“Yes that will be awesome! You can pick me up at seven. I’ll text you the address“ you said making an mental note to do so.

You could hardly wait for your date. You didn’t really care about what your co-workers would think of you. As long as you were happy their opinions didn’t matter.

Tags will be in the reblog! If you want in on the taglist click the link in the bio or send me an ask!

Please do not steal or repost my works. Reblogs are welcome.

This was actually a request. But I can't fir the life of me find the person who requested it. I hope you see it babes❤

#steve rogers x reader #chris evans x y/n #chris evans x you #chris evans x reader #captain america x you #captain america x reader #steve x reader #steve Rogers x you #avengers x y/n #avengers x you #avengers x reader #marvel x reader

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the-fiction-witch · 3 years

Text

NSFW 100 Benny Watts

1. What's the dirtiest thought you've ever had about a total stranger? I don't know, I don't think about strangers all that often I'm usually busy, I think the worst would just be when I kinda get the thought In my head of, Hu. I'd fuck that.

2. Do you prefer sex at night, in the morning, mid-afternoon, or NOW? At night, when the work is done fkr the day, dinners done, and we can go to bed and fuck for a while and go right to sleep after, that's a good evening.

3. What's your favourite way to be seduced? I think we both know it's when people play with my hair, I don't know why, the come here eyes don't do anything, hinting doesn't do anything, you start playing with my hair I'm literally hard in my pants within seconds.

4. What's the dirtiest fantasy you've had at work? That's a good question. Probably just fantasying about beating my aponent and then taking them back to the hotel room and raw fucking them bent over the table, or likewise them beating me and taking me back to the room and riding on my dick for several hours. Either is good.

5. How would you dominate your boss sexually if given the chance? I am my own boss I guess. But if we are saying the people I play against are co workers then yes. Yes I would.

6. What do you do when you get horny in public? It depends why I'm horny. If I'm horny for an actual reason then I'll have to go see who it was causing it, but if it's just like a random everyday boner then no I ignore it, people can't see it though my jeans, can they? If they can great the can look at my dick and be jealous.

7. Have you ever masturbated in a public bathroom? No. I don't masturbate a whole lot and never in public mostly because... Have you seen male public bathrooms? That shit is gross!

8. What's the weirdest thing you've thought about while touching yourself? Chess. Whenever I do actually masturbate it's usually at night, when I'm alone, my works done and I can't get to sleep so I yeah I mess around a little usually while going over chess games in my head, I don't need to imagine anything when I do it I just do it, the touching on its own gets me horny enough, so my head just does it own thing and I usually just think about chess plays.

9. What's the strangest prop you've used to get yourself off? Well pillows. I think that's it pillows and my hand. Or Beth harmon, I'm kidding Beth's great.

10. Do you remember the first time you felt aroused? No I don't. I don't think I ever like had a moment of Hu Im aroused, it just started happening and eventually I noticed to be fair I have been in a constant mood of I wanna fuck things since I was like fourteen. Not sure why? Maybe I'm just really horny and refuse to deal with it?

11. Who gave you your first orgasm? Now that depends because I did it alot in my sleep when I was younger, but the first actual time when I was fully awake and aware what I was doing it was probably Ali, a girl who used to work up at the bar down the street from my apartment, I was having a drink after a championship one or the few times I'd been in there even if the first few times I was underage, and we got talking about this and that and... We went to the bathrooms together, I miss ali, not for the sex but she was always so nice to me. Still I have a better girl now.

12. Do you remember what that first orgasm felt like? Fucking amazing! And now... Now I have a problem because now I wanna do it all the time.

13. Have you ever had sex with someone whose name you never knew? A few times, hotels after championships, airports and the like, I've picked up the odd girl or too I didn't know but it's fine. I think I picked up someone's wife at a competition once?

14. What's your favourite thing about a quickie? How simple it is. With a quickie both people involved know what this is, we both just wanna fuck and get our release so it's very much a simple understanding, sometimes you have sex with people and they assume that means you give a shit? It doesn't we fucked doesn't mean I like you, it means I was horny, you where horny and now it's over.

15. What the most sexually daring thing you've ever done? Airplane sex! That was intense because those bathrooms are not sound proof in the slightest, you have to be dead silent or everyone can hear you fucking your girlfriend.

16. Have you ever fantasized about fucking one of your teachers? Maybe... when I was a lot younger

17. Do you ever mentally strip strangers just for kicks? Sometimes depends on the stranger, but more often people I know, like people I've had sex with before or you know my girlfriend, but to be fair I'm never not mentally undressing y/n?

18. And then imagine, in dirty detail, what it would be like to fuck them? Sometimes, again much more likely people I know and alot less now I have y/n, before her yeah pretty much everyone but now I'll strip some people in my head every so often but only imagine y/n.

19. Have you ever kissed someone of the same sex? Yeah, many times, towens is a great kisser, also gives amazing blow jobs.

20. What inspires you to make the first move? Ask them! Literally I do not get all the hinting and the cute eyes and shit just.mm you want to fuck me just ask me to have sex! It's just that simple. Why does it need to be complicated.

21. In your opinion, what does it mean to be good in bed? Making it good for you but also for your partner people forget about that sometimes you not just in it for you they want some too don't be a ick and just get yourself off, you have to make it good for them too, that and consent is important, not just to start the sex but also during, you don't know if she likes spanking, you don't know of she wants like her hair pulled or her boobs felt ext. Ask don't just do it.

22. Have you ever cheated on a boyfriend or girlfriend because you just couldn't help yourself? .... Yes. But it was always in relationships that weren't all that serious, or where fairly open anyway, I cheated on beth do I care? No! Because she fucked harry so I kinda think that's fair? It's only in that kinda situation but if I hadn't I would have my sweet y/n, and I'll never cheat on her.

23. Have you ever pushed the boundaries of fidelity to the brink and then retreated just for the rush? No.. that just seems weird.

24. Do you have a go-to masturbation fantasy?

I do not have a go to fantasy, except maybe my little kitten snuggling up with me

25. What kind of porn turns you on?

Not a lot really, because porn isn't... that great at the moment I do not have time do go to like the weird little theatre's that play them, the best bet really is things like hustler and various magazines you can pick up in newsagents... which I admit I am partial too having a flip though sometimes.

26. Have you ever had sex with your eyes closed?

No always open

27. Have you ever blindfolded or handcuffed your partner?

Many times yes, But I have found I much rather be handcuffed, I like when y/n handcuffs me to our bed, I like blindfolding her though, maybe handcuffing her too.

28. Does naughty talk get you aroused?

Sometimes, depends what's said

29. Are you sure about that, my dirty little forest nymph of a sex god?

Yeah? How about we go handcuff you to our bed sugar and see how much whispering in your ear you can take before your dripping for me?

30. What's the dirtiest thing someone's ever said to you during sex?

"Benny, I want you to fuck me Hard! and when we're done don't pull out I want us to fall asleep with you inside me so tomorrow we can fuck again without you ever leaving me, so You can be inside me all night long"

Yeah... that was hot. to be fair I did eat her out and edge her for like half an hour so, I don't blame my kitten for going a little cock crazy.

31. Have you ever watched another couple get it on without them knowing?

Once. Okay if you have sex by a pool you have to accept there might be people in here hotel rooms who overlook the pool who can see you!

32. Have you ever watched another couple have sex with their permission?

Does three ways count? because for some of that I was watching Beth and Clio have sex so... yes?

33. How would you respond if a couple approached you to be their "third"?

Depends who it was? Towens and his boyfriend? yes! Beth and Clio? Yes! Beth and Jolene? Yes! Harry and Beth... Eh I'd think about it? But I guess nowadays We'd be the dirty couple asking for a third? won't we kitten?

34. What's the most flattering thing someone's said about your naked body?

"so Perfect I wish I could have you inside me forever"

35. When's the last time you had a vivid sex dream?

I do not

36. What do you think an orgy would be like?

Ummm very very fun. Would you like that kitten? a nice hotel room? all our chess friends? and getting everyone to have a nice orgy? Well I'd be happy to it would be fun, but... you know I don't share kitten.

37. Have you ever propositioned a total stranger?

Yes many times

38. What does your ideal one-night stand look like?

Uhh maybe a drink, some good sex and then get up in the morning maybe a little spooning, maybe round two if they want to, cup of coffee then fuck off out my house I got shit to do.

39. How long does it take you to get yourself off, on average?

Myself? Uhh About ten minuets? with y/n well usual a good half hour but sometimes my little kitten's mean to me

40. What's the weirdest thing that turns you on?

Hair. Playing with my hair. I don't get why I get hard for it but I do? and... when y/n sticks her tounge out again no clue why just whenever I see her do it it means she being a little brat. Or if she does it unintentionally I can't help looking at it thinking how dirty that tounge of her's has been...

41. Have you ever had a naughty dream about a close friend or family member?

No!

42. Have you ever woken up humping your pillow?

Not woke up humping it. I have been spooning it a lot, and been humping it the previous night but no never woke up humping it

43. When's the last time you orgasmed in your sleep?

Ohh god years ago, I don't do that anymore, well I did actually not so long ago but that wasn't me that was my kitten who was too impatient for me to wake up

44. What's the most embarrassing thing that's happened to you while hooking up?

Moaning the wrong name... yeah I did not live that down. I'm sorry towens! you look a lot like harry from the back, you two have similar hair... and similar asses.

45. Do you like touching yourself in front of the people you sleep with?

Many many times! y/n likes to watch me, but she always strips for me or touches herself too so I've got something nice to watch

46. What's the dirtiest text you've ever sent or received?

Y/n sent me some polaroid's of herself in a park, in a sundress and... nothing else, and I mean nothing, Yellow sundress, striped thigh high socks and nothing... no bra, no panties, fuck I'm getting hard just thinking about those pictures.

I think it was then I really did realize, yeah I love this girl, and I'm going to marry her!

47. Do you prefer professional or amateur porn?

Both are good, they have there draw backs but more likely amateur because I like my kitten.

48. What's your favourite blowjob technique?

Tounge! Need I repeat my weird like of tounges but... when she's licking and swirling it around fuck! I get loud! and god it makes me cum quick.

49. If you had to pick, would you be a dominatrix or a submissive?

Noooo! don't make a me choose!

But I love when my kitten handcuffs me and rides me till she's satisfied!

and I also love bending her over the table and ordering her to cum!

I can't choose! there both soo good...

I guess if I had to. Dominate but only because It's slightly more options of stuff to do and because I like calling her kitten.

50. Is there anything you won't do in bed?

anything with like piss and shit can fuck right off I don't know how anyone is into that! but anything else in the world my kitten want's she can have it just not that.

51. What's your dirtiest sexual fantasy?

Its kinda something I really really want but also really don't want, I like the idea of it but it would be horrible. I kinda have a fantasy about Y/n, inviting some... friends over, and letting them all... have there fun with me? literally like tie me to the bed, y/n, beth, clio, jolene, really anyone else towen's too if he's down, just everyone can just use me as a literally cock slave and I would be so fucking happy I would let everyone fuck me!

But that would not go well, I can't stay hard that long, and the girls would fight, and... it wouldn't be good.

so other then that... Ummmm I wanna take y/n to central park! in that sundress.. see how long we can last before I bend her over and fuck my little kitten.

52. How many people have you slept with?

I have stopped counting.

53. Where's the weirdest place you've had sex?

A Plane bathroom? bar bathroom? that time we did it in a pool? I don't know I've had sex lots of weird places?

54. What's your favourite part of Y/n's body?

Her tounge she knows how much I like it . Her pussy, Ummm her pussy's so sweet I could eat my little kittens pussy for hours, and it feels so good around me I mean I fucked her and never ever want another girl ever again, she turned me! someone who fucked around for fun into a one girl guy would would never dream of cheating on my sweet little wifey.

55. Have you ever had anal sex?

Yes, many times, It's the one thing about being in a committed relationship that I miss being with a girl, I miss anal. But I'm sure we could get a toy so she can still do it.

56. If you could choose what Y/n was wearing right now, what would you choose?

Sundress! I love her little sundress! and nothing else.

57. Where on your body is your favourite place to be touched?

hair... Or my hips, I love when she touches my hips

58. If you could have sex anywhere in the world, where would it be?

Anywhere I don't care.

59. When did you first had sex?

I was sixteen, and it was a bar bathroom. But it was amazing!

60. What's the best sex you've ever had?

The first time I had sex with y/n, the first time that we actually had sex we were in a little hotel in Cali, and it was amazing! she was so amazing, I'd never felt so good in my life!

61. What's your favourite position?

I love from the side, its so good when it's an early morning or, if we're both a little lazy, we start off spooning then have a few kisses and then after a couple of minuets she's screaming for me.

62. Have you ever been caught having sex?

Weirdly never,

63. Do you watch porn?

No! it's hard to find the places, and there always full of perverts.

64. What kind of porn do you watch?

I look at magazines. Or my little kitten. Oohhh we could make a porno?

65. How often do you masturbate?

Not very often, once a month maybe

66. Name a sex position you'd like to try?

I want to try a weird like upside down thing

67. Do you prefer to give or receive?

Give! I love hearing her scream! I love when she does it took but I like taking care of her better.

68. Have you ever been skinny dipping?

Many times, I wish we could more often but it's going to one of the warmer places becuase... new York is too fucking cold for that shit! but last time we where in paris in the summer we went skinny dipping and it's so fun, unfortunately it doesn't last long because one of us breaks and just has sex.

69. What's the most sex you've had in a day?

Oohh I think four times, i do not have the like replenishment ability to do anymore then that.

70. Are you loud or quiet during sex?

Loud! I know I'm loud but I like her to know how good she's making me feel, besides' she's louder.

71. Have you ever tried using food during foreplay?

No, that seems... sticky.

72. What's the first thing that sexually attracts you to someone?

Voice, and looks I guess.

73. Would you say you have any fetishes?

I like calling y/n kitten, and I love torturing her!

74. When it comes to BDSM, how far have you gone/would go?

I think I've probably gone... very very far.

75. What's your favourite toy?

well my little kitten is my toy. But I do enjoy this little toy we got recently that turns me into a little vibrator for her, i like it because well it makes me hard as fuck and she likes it because I slightly vibrate inside her, and it rubs on her clit for me which Is good because sometimes my hands are... preoccupied.

76. Do you ever read erotic fiction?

I've read stories people send into magazines about fucking stewardesses and hotel maids? does that count?

77. Have you joined the mile high club?

Yes I have, I think by now I'm probably like a platinum member?

78. Do you think you could take off Y/n underwear with no hands?

Yes I can. I have tried. Many times. but I can't anymore... my kitten doesn't bother with panties anymore

79. Would you say you're kinky?

Do. do I need to answer this question or does everything else here answer that enough?

80. Do you enjoy shower sex?

Not really no. The water never stays hot, the shower spray means one of you is always cold, it's weirdly dry, it's hard to get the angle, it's just way more trouble then it's worth, I'll wait and just cuddle her in the shower then bend her over the bathtub before she puts her towel on. but! Bath sex? I like.

81. Where's the weirdest place you've ever masturbated?

I don't really do it anywhere then my bed, or the shower.

82. Do you like to be spanked?

Yes I do, It's amazing! I like it a lot. and I also like doing it.

83. Have you ever fantasised about someone else during sex?

Not really,

84. If y/n caught you masturbating, would you stop or would you finish?

I would let her watch of course and likely ask her to give me something to watch

85. Have you ever had an inappropriate crush?

Not really I guess.

86. Have you ever cried or fallen asleep during sex?

Falling asleep afterwards is just a habit, but I have cried several times usually when it feels so amazing your eyes water.

87. Do you prefer eye contact or not during sex?

Eye contact is so good!

88. Do you like to kiss during sex?

sometimes, it depends what position as much as I love kissing during sex but some positions it just didn't really work

89. Do you get tired after sex?

Very I want a nap afterwards.

90. How many positions do you think you've tried?

I think we have tried most of them

91. What's the longest you've ever gone without sex?

About six months I guess, I don't know I don't really pay attention

92. How high is your sex drive?

Fairly high

93. What's a surefire way to turn you on?

Ask me for sex? or wear the sundress!

94. Sex with lights on or lights off?

Lights on! I can't be trying to work in the fucking dark.

95. Do you like dirty talk?

Very very much so

96. Do you prefer one night stands or longer-term sexual partners?

I used to really like one night stands, I liked just the hello, fuck goodbye element to it. but Now I have y/n I'm happy with long term and I don't ever want anyone else.

97. Do you prefer to be on top or bottom?

I like both. Don't make me choose!

98.Rough or romantic?

I guess both we are rough but it's in a romantic way

99. Quickie or marathon session?

I love quickies, allows us to get on with other things later in the day, but one night a week we have a nice long marathon session with the toys, and the handcuffs.

100. What's the best thing about our sex life?

I love how kinky and how rough we can get, but it's because we used to miss each other so badly back when we were long distance, it became out release and to show each other just how bad we had missed one another, but it feels so good and its so amazing to make you feel so good and that you make me feel so good, I'll never need anyone else for the rest of my life now I've got you, I mean you literally made me cry it felt so good the first time we had sex, all your sexy little pictures and letter when we were apart, even if we do go a little crazy on each other sometimes, I really do love you kitten more then anything, and I can't wait for us to get married, and for our honeymoon.

#benny #benny smut #benny x reader #benny imagine #benny watts #BENNYSMUT #benny watts imagine #benny watts smut #BENNYWATTS #bennywattssmut #tbs #thomas sangster #thomas brodie sangster

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