#I've heard that helps

[daceydeath]

Hiatus Notice

Hello my loves, I am going on hiatus for a little while to try to get myself back into a good place. I've been having a lot more health issues lately and I can't keep up with writing and deal with them at the same time. I will still be floating around just not posting my own work.

But I will be back after I have rested with more smut, hopeless romantic fluffs and heartbreaking angsts.

Love you guys eternally and see you soon, DaceyDeath xxx

[giantkillerjack]

Today my therapist introduced me to a concept surrounding disability that she called "hLep".

Which is when you - in this case, you are a disabled person - ask someone for help ("I can't drink almond milk so can you get me some whole milk?", or "Please call Donna and ask her to pick up the car for me."), and they say yes, and then they do something that is not what you asked for but is what they think you should have asked for ("I know you said you wanted whole, but I got you skim milk because it's better for you!", "I didn't want to ruin Donna's day by asking her that, so I spent your money on an expensive towing service!") And then if you get annoyed at them for ignoring what you actually asked for - and often it has already happened repeatedly - they get angry because they "were just helping you! You should be grateful!!"

And my therapist pointed out that this is not "help", it's "hLep".

Sure, it looks like help; it kind of sounds like help too; and if it was adjusted just a little bit, it could be help. But it's not help. It's hLep.

At its best, it is patronizing and makes a person feel unvalued and un-listened-to. Always, it reinforces the false idea that disabled people can't be trusted with our own care. And at its worst, it results in disabled people losing our freedom and control over our lives, and also being unable to actually access what we need to survive.

So please, when a disabled person asks you for help on something, don't be a hLeper, be a helper! In other words: they know better than you what they need, and the best way you can honor the trust they've put in you is to believe that!

Also, I want to be very clear that the "getting angry at a disabled person's attempts to point out harmful behavior" part of this makes the whole thing WAY worse. Like it'd be one thing if my roommate bought me some passive-aggressive skim milk, but then they heard what I had to say, and they apologized and did better in the future - our relationship could bounce back from that. But it is very much another thing to have a crying shouting match with someone who is furious at you for saying something they did was ableist. Like, Christ, Jessica, remind me to never ask for your support ever again! You make me feel like if I asked you to call 911, you'd order a pizza because you know I'll feel better once I eat something!!

Edit: crediting my therapist by name with her permission - this term was coined by Nahime Aguirre Mtanous!

Edit again: I made an optional follow-up to this post after seeing the responses. Might help somebody. CW for me frankly talking about how dangerous hLep really is.

[inkskinned]

actually sometimes being neurodivergent is great bc you have a particular kind of Silly Mode that just . manifests glory. harmless fun is my precious side quest & i have a high score in whimsy. like okay if i gotta be the first dork in the dance pit it's gonna be me and this random toddler and we're gonna avril-style rock ouuuuttt

[userscully]

MERLIN “The Diamond of the Day” — Aired on December 24, 2012

[autisticandroids]

CASTIEL: Stop. What's the point if you don't mean it? You fear me - not love, not respect, just fear.

[youtube with closed captions]

a godstiel pity party. i'd like to thank an anon i got way back in february of 2021.

[linktoo]

something about teru's continuous struggle to be humble. something about mob's teaching was the reason why he wanted to temper his ego. something about him facing off something that calls itself god, and also with the likeness of mob ohhh this is so fucked up

"I am god" and he looks like the one person teru genuinely looks up to. his fight against the brainwashing is him refusing to bow down to anyone. god and faith and pedestals and prayer and reverence. guys. GUYS

[the-punforgiven]

Hey, I'm really sorry to have to ask y'all, but my family and I are being evicted from our home and we can't really afford to live anywhere else.

We've been saving up for a while and we've found a place we can almost afford, but we're still short about $4,400. So like, if you have anything you can do to help I'd greatly appreciate it, but like, I get that times are tough all around so I totally understand if you don't

Here's a link to my paypal, but like, please only donate if you've got the cash to spare, I don't want anyone to go hungry on my account

[cerise-on-top]

hi just want to pop in this request how would 141 react to reader who likes to uh.. chomp down on almost anything like maybe their arms? or random bites on the finger?? but its just in a playful way what would their react to it?? anyways you're a lovely writer have a good day <33

Hello! I wrote something similar to that for Gaz already here, so I left him out! His biting section is a bit short since that ask encompassed something similar to it, but it's there!

Price, Ghost and Soap with a Reader who likes to Bite Them

Price: He’d be so utterly confused if you bite him. Depending on whether or not you’re close with each other the scenario could go one of two ways: If you’re close, he’ll raise an eyebrow and ask you what you’re doing. If you respond with showing affection then he’ll be more inclined to let you continue doing whatever it is you’re doing. Truth be told, he’s not the biggest fan of you biting him, but if you’re his partner, then he’ll tolerate it. He knows you’re just being friendly and showing him that you love him in your own way, so he won’t say anything, but he’s not particularly too happy about it. Price doesn’t like how you’re getting saliva on him, he’s not a big fan of something like that. If you’re not his s/o then he’ll tell you to stop.

Ghost: Like Price, he’ll raise an eyebrow upon finding you chomping on him and will ask you what in the world you’re doing. Unlike Price he’ll be more understanding of it all and won’t really mind it too much. He won’t do it back to you in fear of biting your finger off or hurting you otherwise, even if biting people really isn’t his style either unless he has to. He’ll allow it and won’t really comment on it too much, aside from asking you whether or not you want an actual snack instead of him. Bite him and he’ll awkwardly pat your back, he does appreciate you being affectionate with him, though. Doesn’t mind you getting saliva on him either, he’s been through far far worse. Overall, just don’t bite him too hard and he won’t mind, but if you’re genuinely hurting him then he’ll put an end to it all.

Soap: I wouldn’t be surprised if he bit you first, in all honesty. Not by accident, but on purpose. Soap isn’t a biter normally, but he can and will bite someone if dared to or if they lovingly annoy him. However, if you’ve bitten him first then be prepared for him to bite you back. He’s not grossed out by anything, but he will bite down harder than you bite him. Affection like this is a competition and he is hellbent on winning. If you’re his S/O then he’ll also try to leave marks on you to show everyone that you’re his and that you’re having fun with each other. And by that I mean he’ll bite your cheek since that’s one of the most obvious places out there. By the time you’re done being affectionate with each other you’ll both be covered in bite marks, each one deeper and more concerning than the last. But you’re having fun, and that’s all that matters.

[sermna]

It's good to have a non-artist critique your work from time to time because they will 100% have something wild to say

[fighting-naturalist]

Many giggles behind the scenes of season 7 (I think)

(apologies for gif quality, source material apparently filmed with a brick 😂)

[me-sploh-rada-imas]

forever crying over this [x]

[pharawee]

Jam Rachata as TINN & Film Thanapat as CHARN —LAWS OF ATTRACTION | Episode 1

[hyenabeanz]

i swear I can feel my bones crumbling to dust every time I'm reminded how young The Owl House fandom is lmao. Which is fine, obviously; it's a kid's cartoon. But I see posts with Raine and Eda tagged as senior citizens and have read fics where their physical condition reads as practically geriatric.

Y'all, after the time skip, they're like, late forties max. CALM DOWN.

[stormyoceans]

LINE READING SO DEVASTATING I NEED TO DIE ABOUT IT

[gotchibam]

Just a heads up, I might open commissions soon since I'll need extra budget for the next month! I know I still have a backlog of ko-fi doodles I need to work on but I'll try my best to do them alongside the comms 😤💪💪💪

[limestreet]

Jesus Christ, nothing shows to you how unusual and challenging Cathy Earnshaw is as a heroine more than watching the average adaptation of Wuthering Heights. I don't think I've seen one yet where they didn't neuter her.