#I've seen it several times and it just kind of makes me really uncomfortable and upset

[cruelsister-moved2]

ugh i dont want to always go on abt it but i really wish extians were better at like... Reading the room 😭

[renthony]

I wish people would give authors of original fiction the same update grace time they give authors of fanfiction.

A fanfic author says, "sorry I haven't posted much over the past couple years, I've been dealing with severe depression and fatigue," and most people are like, "you poor thing, you're so valid, take your time." Like, yeah, there are jerks, but I see so many posts telling people not to harass fanfic authors over long update times. It seems to be generally accepted that asking "omg when is the next update?!" is rude to do to a fanfic author.

This never seems to be true about original fiction. People constantly bitch that their favorite trad pubbed author is "taking too long" with their next book. George R.R. Martin went on record last year to say that people making "lol he'll die before the next book comes out" jokes make him super uncomfortable, and that's just one example off the top of my head. I've seen similar crappy things said to countless other, less-well-known authors. I've had people ask me "when" -- not IF, but WHEN -- my next book will be finished, regardless of whether I've said I'm even working on something. It sucks.

Y'all know that OC is also hard to write when you're depressed, fatigued, and dealing with the capitalist hellscape, right? Even when it's your main job, writing is fucking hard. Sometimes it feels like people think you only have human limits when you're an amateur artist, and the second you do it for pay, you must get some kind of superpower that negates all your disability, stress, fatigue, and chaotic life events that take time and energy away from creative work.

But it doesn't. It really, really fucking doesn't. I wish I could make art on the timeline people seem to expect, but I just fucking can't, okay?

[bangarangdarling]

I haven't caught up on all of your writing, so I'm not sure if you've already done your own take on this:

Prompt: Eddie wakes up in the hospital (after the demo-bats of course) really, really loopy on painkillers and the first person he sees is Steve...

This was exactly the fluff fest I needed to break up all the angst I've been in the middle of :') Thank you!!

He really just had one thing to say to all the soccer moms and televangelists who always said people like Eddie were going to hell–

Suck it. 

Eddie absolutely was not in hell, thank you very much. Sure, for some reason his sides hurt like a bitch occasionally. And he couldn’t really talk super well since there was what seemed like an entire roll of tape and gauze on the side of his face. And maybe he couldn’t move his left leg around much, but who cares about those things? 

In the grand scheme of things, he was living a fucking dream. 

Heaven, if you ask him. Take that, Pastor Davies, you wrinkled prick. 

Honestly, he’d kind of always thought stereotypical heaven was overrated. With the way the stuffy religious folk always talked about it, it seemed like a total drag. Just prayer and eternal…boringness. 

This heaven was way better. 

It was mostly just floaty. Things blurred. Time moved strangely. Minutes stretched out forever, and yet he would blink sometimes and all of a sudden the morning sun in the window would be gone. The lamp beside his bed would be on, instead. He loved those times because usually a voice accompanied it, saying words that Eddie knew he recognized, but just couldn’t give enough effort to understand. It was nice, though. 

The voice sounded kind. It stumbled over words sometimes, like maybe it was reading off of something aloud, but it was familiar and the cadence lulled Eddie back into those peaceful, floaty times where he didn’t have to think about anything at all. 

Whenever he was hungry, food was just there. Eddie could have sworn he’d thought about pudding once and then bam pudding was in front of him. Like magic. Several times he’d come to consciousness with a mouth drier than a motherfucker, and there were always hands that reached over to supply him sips of water. 

The hands were so nice. Big. Gentle. He’d felt them combing through his hair before, he’d thought. 

Best of all, though? The angel. 

God, his angel. 

Prettiest goddamn face he’d ever seen. At first the angel looked sad, red-rimmed eyes and a deep set frown, and that had simply not been okay. No way. A fuckin’ masterpiece of a face like that being upset was criminal. Just…not allowed. Eddie had said as much, mumbled and probably slurred to hell, but it made those pretty lips lift at the corners a bit.

He’d made it his mission, then, to make the literal celestial being in front of him smile every time he could focus his brain power enough to make words. 

His most recent swim up to consciousness had him coming to with fingers in his hair and a light pressure felt to the immobilized side of his face. His eyes met with his angel’s and he couldn’t help his dopey smile. Angel’s lips moved, that kind voice breaking through the haze. 

“...to wake you. Sorry, your bandage was peeling back. It looked uncomfortable,” Eddie’s pretty angel smiled down at him, seeming slightly nervous all of a sudden. Like he’d been caught doing something he shouldn’t have.

It took him a try or two to push his own voice out, rough from disuse. 

“Don’ say sorry, ‘s fine. You c’n touch me anytime, angel.” Eddie giggled when the angel’s cheeks flushed an adorable pink and his hands fluttered around like he didn’t know where to put them. 

“Oh, come on, man, don’t–hey, stop that. Quit grinning so wide, you’ll pop your stitches!” 

Eddie batted at the hand that came up to grab the non-patchwork side of his face, pushing at his lips like if the angel could physically hold it down he could stop the smile from growing any larger. Silly angel. Eddie took the opportunity to seize one of those hands in his. He shook it around loosely, celebrating. Hah! Caught him. 

It gave Eddie the chance to get a closer look at his fingers. Nice fingers, long. Eddie would smack a kiss on every one of them if he could. (There’s a possibility he may have said that part out loud, if the choked sound from the angel was any judge.) 

No ring on the hand though. His angel wasn’t married. Could angels even get married? Was it against the rules in heaven or something? 

Eddie leveled a very serious look to the other man, clutching the captured hand to his chest fiercely. Or, as fiercely as he was capable, seeing as the soft, floaty feeling was starting to take over again. 

“I would marry you a’nyway. Okay? Don’t care what the rules are.” 

─── ･ ｡ﾟ☆: *.☽ .* :☆ﾟ. ───

Steve spent the last several nights getting well acquainted with the scratchy vinyl of his hospital chair and the fourth floor’s only vending machine. There were only so many power naps and snickers bars a man could take. 

His back ached from slumping over onto the hospital bed to accommodate Eddie’s hold on him. It was hard to care about that, though, when the hand clutched in his twitched slightly in sleep before tightening back again. He’d been able to relax the older boy back into rest earlier, smiley and malleable. 

Eddie only agreed to it after insisting Steve didn’t “fly away without him” whatever that meant. 

Those crazy strong drugs the doctors had pumped him with were doing the work to keep him comfortable, despite making him say things he never would have had he been more aware. 

Steve didn’t have the heart to pull away. He should. He should put some space between them. He shouldn’t take anything Eddie says or does to heart at all–he’s high as hell on painkillers. That would make any guy a little loopy. Make him say things he doesn’t mean. 

Eddie adjusted in his sleep, smiling a bit, body angled towards Steve. His hand was warm, and if Steve moved his fingers up just a bit to his wrist, he could feel the steady thump there. 

In the quiet of the sterile hospital room, Steve thought he maybe could indulge just a bit. No harm in the comfort of two people, just happy to be alive. 

Robin let herself into the room quietly, a paper coffee cup in one hand that Steve knew would be made perfectly to how he liked it. 

It took her barely a beat, taking in the two boys curled in towards each other. 

“So, how many marriage proposals were there today?” 

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

I (24M) and my partner K (26M) are in a long distance relationship. I am currently in the closet, and I live in a very conservative area, whereas K is very much out of the closet and lives in a very left leaning area on the opposite side of the country. Because of this, we don't get to see each other in person very often due to the cost of airfare and it not being safe for him to visit me.

About a month ago, I got an invitation to crash for a weekend with a close childhood friend--who I will refer to as A(25M)--some time in January. I have not seen A in several years, and his house is only a day or two's drive away, so I happily accepted. I told K, and he suggested we take the opportunity to meet up since I am going to be out of state.

I was hesitant, because I really don't want to turn this emotional reunion with A into a couple's getaway. That said, it's been a while since K and I saw each other, so I said sure, figuring that I'd stay with A for the weekend, then extend my trip and spend a few days on vacation with K.

Well, plans suddenly changed when I finally got approved for my own apartment in a more left leaning area. Surprise! I no longer have to worry about K's safety when he comes to visit. He is planning to come down and see me in a couple months.

Here's the issue. I love K, but I want some time alone with A. We haven't seen each other in 7 years, and I'm going to be staying at his house. It feels weird to ask if I can bring another person into his (already kind of cramped) house that he does not know, and now that my rent has suddenly doubled, I don't really have the means to rent an AirBnB or hotel room for the week.

K has also expressed jealousy regarding my friendship with A due to how close we have gotten very suddenly (not suddenly for us, again, we've known each other for 13 years, we just fell out of contact), as well as some things that we have in common that K and I do not. He has not asked me to distance myself or anything, I am not interested in A like that, and I have made that clear to him. It just feels like it would be a very weird vibe to bring K to A's house and risk making A uncomfortable in his own home.

K is also already coming to my house very soon, so it's not like it will have been forever since I've seen him. He hasn't bought the tickets yet for either trip, but I feel guilty telling him I don't want to see him, especially since he has already expressed jealousy about A and I's relationship. WIBTA if I told K that I don't want to bring him along when I go to visit A?

What are these acronyms?

[oxceen]

Alterhuman alphabet!

(credits to @/local-xenogender-icon)

A - awakening

When did you realise you are an alterhuman? At what age, how long ago?

I awakened around two years ago, when I was 12. My neighbour/friend and I were hanging out outside our houses and he asked if I knew what a therian is. I said no, and he explained it to me, and told me that he is one. I was really interested, because I've felt very cat-like since I was a kid, and often saw myself as a cat, and afterwards I researched more about therianthropy and asked my friend a ton of questions and around a week later I confirmed that I am indeed a therian!

B - balance

Does your identity affect your social life (school, work, etc.)? Does it cause troubles or not?

It doesn't really affect my social life much, but I get phantom ears very often and it gets uncomfortable sometimes, and my friends often ask me if im ok bc I'm aggressively rubbing my palm against my head to try and get rid of my phantom shift :,)

C - city

Do you live in a city? If yes, is it hard for you to be away from nature? Does your therio/kintype even need nature?

I live in a sub-urban area (thankfully) because cities are pretty overwhelming for me. The area I live in has plenty of trees and bushes but it's mainly just in people's front yards and I wish there was a small forest nearby that I could walk around in, but sadly there isnt't :(

D - diary

Do you have a diary about your alterhuman experiences? If not, do you want to start one?

I used to, but I kept forgetting to add entries to it so I gave up lol

E - experience in the community

What is your experience and thoughts about the alterhuman community?

So far, everyone's been really nice! Everyone seems to be really supportive of eachother and I've only seen discrimination in the community once or twice. I'm also a little concerned about the nonhumans who are severely struggling mentally due to their nonhumanity.

F - friends

Have you told your friends about your identity?

My three closest friends know, and they're very supportive!

G - gear

Do you have any gear? If yes, is it handmade or bought?

I have an ear headband that my neighbour gifted me for christmas, and although the colours are wrong, I love it and wear it pretty often. I also have a half-finished yarn tail that's been a WIP for a couple months now because I can't find the time to finish it. And I also have a necklace with a green gem, a rainbow and a wolf pendant! It was originally just the gem to match with my best friend's purple gem, but then I added the rainbow (bc LGBTQ+) and the wolf pendant came from an old necklace I got alongside a book (Wolves of the Beyond, I def recommend) that I got in 2nd grade.

I - identity

What is (are) your therio/kintype(s)?

Vancouver coastal grey wolf, Turkish Angora, Western jackdaw, orca and banded linsang!

J - jokes

Do you like to make little jokes about your identity or is it rather serious for you?

Both! I don't really make jokes about it myself, but my friends often joke around about my nonhuman behaviours (in a nice way) and I laugh along :)

K - knowledge

In scale of 1-10, how big do you think your knowldege about alterhumans is? Are you new to this topic?

I'd say around a 6-7. I know pretty much all the basic stuff, but the more complicated stuff like physically-identifying nonhumans and otherlinks I don't really know much about yet, mainly because I've only recently heard about them.

L - liking, loving

Do you like your therio/kintype(s)? Do you love or dislike it/them?

I like my theriotypes a lot! I find my theriotypes really interesting, there's always something new to learn about my kind.

N - nature

Does your therio/kintype live in the wild, or rather not? (E.g. it's a house pet, or it's a robot.)

All my theriotypes are wild, except for my domestic cat theriotype.

O - otherhearted

Are you also otherhearted? If yes, what is your kithtype(s)?

I'm snakehearted!

P - popularity

Is your therio/kintype "popular" or is it rather rare?

I'd say my wolf theriotype is very "popular" if you just look at it like a wolf, but I've only seen one or two therians who are coastal wolves like me.

I see domestic cat therians everywhere so it's needless to say my cat theriotype is pretty "popular"

I see crow therians and raven therians a lot, but I've never met another jackdaw like me. I wonder why /gen

I used to think orca therians are rare, but after joining tumblr I found that there are quite a lot like me!

I've never seen another linsang therian, which makes sense because barely anyone knows asiatic linsangs even exist. They were discovered only in 2013 and we know next to nothing about their reproduction, social behaviours, and diet.

R - real body

Do you feel good about your physical body? Do you experience gender dysphoria?

I don't get gender dysphoria often, but I do get species dysphoria. A lot of the time I wish my legs were shaped differently, or my face was longer, or I had a tail, wings, etc.

S - sex

Does your therio/kintype have a different sex than you?

Yes! I identify dpecifically as a male dominant/"alpha" (I dont really like using that word to describe it)/pack leader wolf because I do not feel maternal instincts toward young wolves. I know this because when I look at pictures of kittens, or see actual kittens, I feel a strong urge to look after them, clean them up, protect them from danger, etc. Aside from these two theriotypes, I don't identify as a specific sex.

T - traits

What are your alterhuman traits? (E.g. a need to hunt, bark, ect.)

I get extremely aggressive toward people who wrong me or people close to me, and my typical response is to growl/snarl at them.

If a friend gets their hand close to my face, I try and play-bite but they always draw their hand away (understandably).

When I'm in a group of people, or I see a group of people, I can often tell who the "pack leader" is within a couple seconds, even if it's not obvious to a human.

Very wide smile during tense/awkward situations or any situation where I feel threatened. It's basically a snarl but bc im physically a stupid human, no one notices >:(

Sometimes I raise my shoulders and then shake myself all out (usually involuntarily), which is like the human equivalent of feather rousing

I sometimes also bump/rub my head on my (close) friends' shoulders as a way to greet them

U - urges

If you have a theriotype, are you good at controlling your animalistic urges? Do they bother you?

I'm fairly good at controlling my urges, but when I get angry I feel like I'm gonna lose control and just go feral on everyone. It's never actually happened though.

W - wondering

How do you think you would look like, if you could physically shapeshift into your therio/kintype? (Describe or put an image here!)

I think I'd just look like any other member of my species.

Y - yarn

If you wanted to buy/make a tail, would it be real fur or fake/yarn fur?

I prefer real fur, but I'd only buy it if I'm 100% certain it's not from a cruel fur farm. But if I'm unable to buy it, I'd make my own, from yarn (which I've already started doing).

Z - zoo

How do you feel about zoos (a place, not z00philes)? Are they good or bad in your opinion? Do you want to go there to meet your theriotype (if you are a therian).

I think zoos are okay (only ethical ones), I enjoy going to them and seeing all the cool animals there. Sadly none of my theriotypes are at any of the zoos I normally visit.

___________

:3

[lavellenchanted]

If you're still taking requests for the fic prompts ask: what about Japril + 65?

(boop boop!)

BOOP! 65. I wish you could see yourself the way I see you

"What are those?"

April glanced up at Jackson and smiled, shifting over to make room for him to sit beside her on the couch. "Old photo albums. Harriet wanted to know what I looked like at her age."

She angled the album on her knee so Jackson could see the picture she was looking at. It had been a summer's day, and she was standing outside her family's barn with one of the ponies, in an oversize checked shirt, jeans and cowboy books. Freckles covered her face, and her hair in pigtails gleaming in the bright sunlight almost as red as the thick plastic frames of the glasses she was wearing.

"Now that's a fashion choice," Jackson grinned.

April pulled a face and swatted his shoulder. "Hey! I was five. They were my first glasses, and I just picked the most colourful pair in the store, okay?"

"I'm surprised you didn't go for a pink pair with hearts on them."

"If they'd had any I would have," she said, then glanced back down at the photo and sighed. "This was when my sisters started calling me Ducky. My mom told me not to worry, that I'd grow into a swan, but it only got worse when I got to high school."

She flipped several pages forward in the album, to one taken when she was fourteen or fifteen. This was a group shot with all her sisters, but the teenage April was clearly deeply uncomfortable, holding herself back and grimacing more than smiling. Braces glinted on her teeth, and although she had swapped the red glasses for a pair that were a less garish dark purple in colour, they were a smaller style that in hindsight she could see didn't really suit her face and did nothing to conceal the acne that had started to develop in patches on her cheeks.

"You can see why I didn't have dates lining up around the corner."

"No, actually, I can't. You look fine. So you had braces and a few zits," Jackson shrugged. "We all go through awkward phases."

April gave him a look. "Don't try that with me. I've seen your high school photos, Mr Star of the Baseball Team and Prom King. I bet you had girls falling all over you."

"I wouldn't say falling ..."

She snorted. "Uh-huh. Point is, you've always been gorgeous. You wouldn't have looked twice at me in high school."

"I would have!" Jackson protested, putting his arm around her and pulling her close. "I mean, I'm not saying I wasn't an idiot as a teenage boy but you were still you. All I would have to do is talk to you and I would have realised how special you are."

April hummed sceptically, but she smiled, clearly pleased with the compliment and snuggled into him, resting her head on his shoulder.

"And your mom wasn't wrong, was she? You are a swan."

"I don't know. Sometimes - well, a lot of the time, actually, I still feel like Ducky."

Jackson frowned. "What you mean?"

"Oh, you know. I feel like this is what people see when they look at me still - the nerdy, insecure girl that no one really liked. Like I'm always trying to prove that I'm good enough, but all I ever do is really do is prove that I'm not."

Gently, Jackson brought his free hand up beneath her chin and tilted her head back so she could see his face as he replied, "You are good enough. You're more than good enough. I wish you could see yourself the way I see you."

"Yeah? How do you see me?"

"April, you're smart and fierce and kind, and you're the bravest person I know. And maybe you're a little neurotic at times," he said lightly, "but you're also a badass. You get up after every setback you have and you try again. You have no idea how much I admire that. You're an incredible surgeon and the most amazing mom and I don't know how the hell I got lucky enough to convince you to give me another chance but I'm grateful for it every single day."

She had flushed deeper with every word and looked up at him now with bright, shining eyes, the kind of look that usually meant a kiss - and a whole lot more - wasn't far behind. Heat rushed through him, prompting him to add in a rougher voice,

"You are also very, very sexy, and I would be more than happy to take you upstairs and prove that to you."

"Oh yeah?" April arched an eyebrow, her lips curving into a slow, teasing smile, and Jackson knew they weren't going to be looking at any more photos tonight. "I think I might just take you up on that."

He grinned and leaned down to kiss her. "Then I guess I'd better get started."

[hauntedpotat]

Hi. Aroace rant, don't mind me

This is more of an ace rant if anything, but I'm aroace and this is what I'm feeling rn so. Yeah.

Why tf is there so many songs on the radio that are blatantly sexual? Like I'm just trying to survive a car ride with my dad and a song will come on with descriptions of what they want __ to do, etc. They are one step away from saying actual sexual terms (if they aren't already!). This has happened several times now in the past month with at least 4 separate songs (I couldn't give you the name/artist bc my dad's car doesn't have that kind of display, unless it's literally announced or previously known I have no idea what they're called) It's not even an adult radio station! It's a standard pop one. I always end up getting so uncomfortable bc there's nothing I can do about it (not my car, i cant ask to change the station, and i cant put earbuds in bc my dad will get upset at me) and it just overall sucks.

Dont get me wrong, I have absolutely nothing against sexual music, whether it's discreet or very obvious. If you want to listen to it, good for you! Genuinely! But what I do have a problem with is that it is unavoidable when listening to a standard radio station. I'm sure I'm not the only uncomfortable person here, for any reason! Young kids, aro and ace folks, people who just don't want to hear sexual music, and anyone else. Listening to sexual music should be a choice, by everyone involved, same with any other topic that makes people uncomfortable! I've seen aro people address how much it sucks that most music on the radio is about romantic (and/or sexual) relationships, but that doesn't upset me, and many other people have talked about that before. It's not really my place since I don't have strong feelings about that one, sorry.

Anyways. Rant over. Just wanted to word vomit this somewhere, thanks for reading if you've gotten this far 👍

[emotionalcadaver]

I've written and rewritten this post so many times, and I've debated even posting it at all.

And before we begin: I am not trying to make anyone feel bad, or place blame on anyone. I understand that many of you were manipulated or worse. But this is part of how this jackass and his behavior affected me, so I want to talk about it.

The first time I looked at his blog, it was after the wonderful @shelbydelrey messaged me to warn me that there was a new person in the fandom actively attacking Grace fans. Because I write many Tommy x Grace x OC-centric fics, I was concerned, so I took a peak at his blog to see what was going on.

And I have to say, I have never felt so unwelcome in (at least a part) of a fandom in my life.

Something I haven't seen discussed a ton is just the blatant bullying and misogyny that this man publicly displayed. Post after post of him attacking Grace fans, picking fights, laughing at them, shaming them, hurling insults at them...He'd go out of his way to find content featuring Grace and comment hate on them, and then laugh about it with his followers. And this misogyny wasn't exclusive to Grace, but seemed to spread to other women as well, just based on some of the non-Grace related posts I also saw that he made.

Now, I actually don't give a shit whether people like Grace or not. I personally have a soft spot for her, but I don't expect other people to share in my feelings, and I respect their opinions. Most of the time, if I see a post hating on her, I just keep scrolling.

But this...this really got to me. It was so disheartening to see someone behave in what-- at least to me--was such a blatantly and obviously misogynistic way while being cheered and egged on by a significant part of the fandom. It made me feel so uncomfortable and unwelcome. And considering his popularity and how so many people seemed to see no problem with his behavior, it made me question if I was even welcome in this fandom at all, and several times I considered deleting my blog and my fics and leaving entirely.

I'm not going to lie; it broke my view of this fandom a little bit. I can't begin to describe how saddening it was to see that this behavior was not only accepted, but actively enabled and seemingly practiced by so many. Obviously now I know that there were far more complicated things going on behind the curtain, but at the time, that's what it appeared to me: that an extremely large part of the fandom saw nothing wrong with speaking about women--real or fictional--in horrifically offensive and demeaning ways, and openly bullying those who did not share their views on certain characters/parts of canon.

I became paranoid, even after blocking him, that he or one of his followers would find my blog, and I would be the next target of a barrage of hate and harassment. So I blocked most people I saw associating with him (I've unblocked most of you now). Because it felt like that only way to protect myself. Not only did I not want to ever be associated with the kind of behavior he displayed on his blog, but I also was terrified of getting dogpiled onto by his followers, even for the simple act of having blocked him. I was literally convinced that if my blog was noticed by him or anyone closely associated with him, I would get run out of the fandom. So I chose to remain in my own little bubble of mutuals who I trust, and did not make any significant efforts to reach out to or connect with new people.

Again, this is not me trying to call anyone out except for him. I know many of you--or at least, I hope many of you--did not intend to enable a misogynist monster or a bully. And ultimately he was the one who created this hostile environment, and it is very possible, knowing now that he has a habit of making alternative accounts, that many of his "followers" who showed support for his behavior may have just been him on other accounts, or sending himself asks via anon.

I don't really have a specific point to this post. I just wanted to share these feelings somewhere, I suppose. I hate this man for what he has done to so many of you and this entire community. And for how he made me feel so frightened and unwelcome by huge parts of this fandom.

[cain-speaks]

Harassing Content/Fanwork Creators

hiya, serious post time.

so i've been noticing some serious harassment towards people who make content or create fanwork. i've been wanting to stay something for a while but i'm not really good at this stuff so i was holding back,, i have decided not to do that any longer.

the lack of empathy or awareness people seem to have when interacting with content creators is kinda appalling tbh?? like i've seen people comparing people's art (telling person A they should do smth more like person B as if there's a more correct way to do it), putting people's ocs in situations the artist has stated they're uncomfortable with, trying to rush artists, or just outright disregarding an artist's boundaries.

the grossest part of this to me is that it seems people grow more obsessed w something when an artist says "this will never happen/please don't do this". i'm not going to tag people bacause i don't want to annoy anybody but as an example: i've seen an a fanwork creator repeatedly state that their oc will not have children of any kind and they're not comfortable with her being put in positions where she's watching over children in any capacity, and rather than accepting this, people try to find ways around it, question it, or outright ignore it.

i don't care if you didn't mean to be rude or if you were genuinely asking. if someone says "DON'T DO THIS WITH MY CHARACTER", don't fucking do it. it's so disgustingly disrespectful among other things (that i can't put into words bc i will just rant for several paragraphs gbhdf).

you wanna draw kids? make your own oc and draw their kids. stop trying to push that on other people.

also about rushing artists: art is fucking hard. people have lives outside of content creation, and even if they didn't, you still have to handle mental health, burnout, etc. on top of it. don't ask an artist "hey when is x coming out?" especially if they're fairly active?? like wtf have some fucking empathy.

to artists, content creators, and fanwork creators: you do not have to put up with ANYONE'S bullshit. your wellbeing and happiness is important. lay out your boundaries and if people disregard them, block them. people have shit to say about it? block them. you are not evil for wanting to be respected, especially over simple stuff, and being blocked is not the end of the world. people will survive and move on, and if they don't, maybe it'll teach them a much needed lesson.

[all-the-fun-of-the-cirkus]

okay, so.

waltz.

rarely have i watched an episode and immediately come here to talk about, but i have a lot of thoughts i need to get out

so firstly, the title. obviously a callback to duet from the first series (still the best single chunk of star trek i've seen yet). that one was a two-hander between kira and marritza, the former already having condemned the cardassian and the latter struggling to work through what he did in the occupation, and this is the same with sisko and dukat. except marritza felt genuine remorse, accepted he was wrong, and that's what dukat can never do

he's awful, i know, but he's a fantastic character, because he is a character. he has a sense of humour, soft spots, humanising (so to speak) moments, he's a real, fleshed out person, who just happens to be, as sisko says, true evil. and that works because he truly, genuinely believes he isn't. and what's more, he needs everyone to see that too. we saw that with his relationship with kira, his banter with sisko, his constant bemoaning that the bajorans didn't accept him, it wasn't just posturing, or pr, he genuinely needs to be liked, and he can't understand why people don't, because as far as he's concerned, as people so often point out, he's the hero of the story in his own mind, and he can't be wrong

that's played out superbly in his hallucinations here; weyoun is his cold and clinical side, dumar his arrogance and pride, kira his doubt and self-loathing, and they criticise and needle him throughout, but in the end, crucially, they're all telling him the exact same thing - what he really thinks

and what he wants to hear is that he's the good guy, which is where the political metaphor gets interesting. this whole time i've interpreted the occupation of bajor as a holocaust allegory, obviously, the cardassians are the nazis, bajorans jews. and that is of course a big part of it, but the connection i didn't make until now is the british empire

dukat's big speech is fully "white man's burden," the bajorans as savages centuries behind cardassia, following backwards religion, no technology, who clearly needed civilising by their superiors, bringing into the light, and dukat was the kind father helping guide them into the light. and he really believes it's for the best! he tells himself he doesn't despise them, that he doesn't want to wipe them off the face of the galaxy, it's their fault for being too stupid to appreciate him, to see what he's trying to do for them, how he only wants to help them if they'd only stop resisting and submit to those who know better than they do

part of this is that he insists that he's "one of the good ones," that another prefect would have been harsher, crueler. and this is where it gets interesting, because he's probably right. a leader who didn't care about being liked might have killed more bajorans, worked them harder, starved them more, executed them more. dukat may, indeed, have been the lesser of the evils, and that's not really in dispute. what's really compelling about this is that the story never lets this be an excuse. so death rates dropped by 20%? that's great! why didn't they drop by 100%? so labour camp output dropped by 50%? cool, you were still keeping people in labour camps and enslaving them

and i find that uncomfortably compelling in the current climate. i'm not american, but i see full well what's going on there, and it disgusts me. because there's several genocides going on right now, and i'm going to focus on palestine, because the democrats are gleefully funding that genocide and protecting its perpetrators from any repercussions, brutally coming down on any protests. and when people understandably say "hey what the fuck," they remember there's an election this year and go "well is the republicans were in power this genocide would be way worse! you gotta pick the lesser of two evils!" and you know what? they're right! the genocide would probably worse if the republicans were in power! but the democrats committing a less-bad genocide doesn't mean they aren't still committing genocide! because the lesser of two evils is still evil, and sometimes there's no shade of grey

[cursedvibes]

tw // rape and sexual assault

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Can I be honest about something. I feel like Kenjaku fans are really dishonest about their sexual assault and rape.

I know that they didn’t directly rape Choso’s mother themself, but they still orchestrated it and oversaw it and made sure the cursed spirit raped her.

And then there’s Kaori. Is it not rape to have sex in a dead person’s corpse? She couldn’t consent to having her body used like that. It’s rape. And if you try to defend this and say that her body wasn’t hers anymore…that’s beyond vile.

I’m not saying that Kenjaku fans can’t like them or think they’re an interesting character or whatever. But I think it’s deeply harmful that I’ve seen so many of you insist that they’re not a rapist. Too many of you are like “hehe my criminal wife who commits all the crimes XD” and if you’re going to like a character who’s a rapist, could you at least not talk about them like that?

I mean, I can understand being uncomfortable with that and with what Kenjaku did, that's what you're supposed to feel after all. I also don't think Kenjaku fans have the obligation to bring up every single one of their crimes every time we talk about them, even if it's light-hearted. I talked about Kenjaku being a rapist before here and for the most part still agree with what I said there. While from what we know, the way the mother was impregnated wasn't sexual, I can understand calling it rape. It's like if someone was inseminated with a syringe against their will. Technically not sexual, still a violation of the body and reproductive autonomy.

So yes, what they did to the Death Painting mother is vile, so is them killing infants and and exploiting people's bodies in all kinds of ways. In case of Kaori I'm also heavily side-eyeing Jin's involvement there, especially after the reveal about his past. I don't particularly like it when some Kenjaku fans minimize what they did or say it didn't happen at all/excuse it in some other way, I honestly only see that very rarely though. Not nearly as much as people painting Sukuna as the perfect husband for example or him just being deeply misunderstood. Many Kenjaku fans are very much aware of their atrocities, just don't bring it up at every occasion because there's a lot more to talk about. What annoys me much more is people breaking all this down to redundant and tired "backshots" memes.

Still, I don't think all that prohibits you from making jokes about them in general like "my evil wife" etc. You have every right to be uncomfortable with that and I'd advise to block people who you think go too far, I do the same thing myself, but I think in itself it's not a bad thing. We're still talking about a fictional character here after all. As long as you don't lose sight of what they actually did (like I'm getting the impression with many of the backshots memes besides them often being very trans- and homophobic), I don't see the problem.

A lot of that has to do with how jjk engages with these things too. Like the Death Painting experiment isn't treated quite as lightly (and personally, I've never seen anyone joke about that specifically, but maybe I was lucky), but Kenjaku's treatment of Choso for example is and so fans see it as an opening to find the humor in a terrible situation. It's much harder to make jokes about Seiko from Blood on the Tracks, despite her having committed far lesser crimes than Kenjaku because the nature of the story is different. More realistic, you experience the horror of her abuse first-hand and the characters don't make a lot of jokes themselves either. There is much more of a comedic element to Kenjaku, they can be quite a quirky character, so people feel a lot more comfortable making jokes about them. Based on the target, severity and content I don't think that's bad, just a different way of engaging with the media.

When I write about the Death Painting experiment and from the perspective of the mother for example (in fanfic or just my blog), I usually draw upon experiences of rape recovery together with medical trauma. It's not for everyone, but for me, exploring this topic in the safe environment of fiction is interesting and in a way comforting. The horror of the infanticide, worming their way into the Itadori family, their whole relation with Yuuji, the Death Painting experiment is what got me so invested and keeps me invested in jjk in the first place. That's not everyone's reason for engaging with it or Kenjaku, just my perspective. And yeah, I do make jokes about them too because despite all that they can be funny. I mean, they literally just did a comedy show.

[lostonehero]

Even more

New mech au

Better Mech chat (aka earth crew damn you Nastya)

Martin: Are you alright Marius you looked really uncomfortable today

Marius: Humans don't have living hair, and it shows.

Raphella: I can fix that.

Marius: no

Tim: what did it even feel like?

Marius: Remember when you burned your hands? The time we got Brian off the sun. It's kind of like that, but the pain doesn't go away. Elias is fine, he's really friendly, I think, but he's strict with the dress code. I really want a hat.

Jonny: I can't believe I feel bad for you.

Ivy: I rather be experimented on than have my nerves tugged on like that for hours. No that wasn't an offer

TS: The Other Jonny Is Werid. I Want To Be His Friend. He Does Not Like Me.

Brian: you offered to show him how your voice was stolen and he nearly fainted.

TS: We Had Fun.

Brian: honestly I think the job isn't bad suspicious as fuck, but none if the stuff really effects me or TS since we aren't human. I think whatever is going on is speciesest so Martin and Tim be careful.

Tim: Duly noted

Martin: that's worrying.

Jonny: I'll keep you safe.

Martin: you say that with such confidence purring in my lap.

Jonny: Martin please.

Raphella: I have more experiments to run, but I will come up with something for you, Martin.

Martin: Please be careful. Things down there are dangerous, and I don't want Elias to catch you.

Raphella: I will stay safe.

Ashes: I don't think I've ever seen her flustered before.

Jonny: bullshit

Marius: No, Ashes is right. I think Raphella just found the blanket you made her.

Martin: oh does she like it I wanted it to match her wings and scales. I'm trying to make one for all of you to match your non human stuff because it's really cool. Ah Tim I just about done with your sleep mask, are you sure you don't want a blanket I know your eyes bother you but everyone else is getting one.

Tim: the sleep mask is fine.

TS: I Get A Blanket?

Martin: yes! I'm making yours a flag that matches your uniform

TS: I Don't Understand This Feeling. I Won't Let Anyone Harm You Friend.

Jonny: huh

Tim: I'm going to bake you something.

Ashes: Can mine have flames?

Martin: I was gonna match your hair but I can fix it to be flames. Oh I can do raining ashes too like your name.

Ashes: I'm going to help Tim in the kitchen.

Jonny: Martin you're breaking them

Brian: you made me a crochet heart.

Martin: I know it doesn't match yours it's a human heart but uh I hope you liked it.

Brian: Martin I would kill for you.

Several people are typing.

.......

Marius knocks softly before hearing Elias to let him in. He stops seeing a taller, pale man made of muscle in a large coat. "Is this a bad time? I can come back."

Elias smiles from his desk. "No, not at all. Marius, this is my husband Peter Lukas his family are major donors to the institute. Peter, this is my new assistant I've been telling you about."

Peter nods and looks the man up and down. "Tall." His voice was soft, and it surprised Marius. "He has a fake arm."

Elias rolls his eyes. "Peter." He sighs and pinches his brow. "I apologize for him. He's a sea captain he just got back from a long voyage."

"Early." Peter huffs.

Marius smiles. "It's quite alright. I know it's a bit off-putting." He rubs his eyes, feeling an odd burning but dismisses it. He must have earth allergies. "It's lovely to meet you. Do you need me to do anything?"

"Yes, there are tunnels under the institute, I will show you. It's quite the hassle, but there is a library under there, and I will need extra hands grabbing a few books." Elias smiles as Marius nods.

[vegasandhishedgehog]

I've held off posting for a long time about the issue regarding Build and Poi.

A lot of things have rubbed me wrong about the way it went down, how the people involved handled it in the beginning, I am severely allergic to Twitter, and all in all, it's been so much to take in and digest over the past few weeks. I have no real understanding of law for any fucking country and I am not a source blog for news or updates or translations. Speaking in support of anyone, to me, seems perfectly inappropriate and useless. As much as I have my own personal thoughts and feelings, I'm aware of biases and that's no basis for an open conversation.

That, and well....I've been here before. I don't mean with the thing about the dug-up tweets that caused a riot a few months ago. I don't even mean controversial celebrity trials in general. I'm talking about people I personally knew very well being in a lawsuit where some hefty accusations were made and the community got split over their feelings about it. It's a fucking nightmare. I don't need to repeat those details because it was a different case and projecting any of those circumstances onto the one in question would be wrong.

So I'm only going to say this once.

Cut it out.

Stop being self-righteous. Stop taking extreme positions and cutting off friends whose thoughts and views vary. I don't care how convincing one side or the other is to you right now - we do not know the truth and there is a fairly long wait for us to have it laid out for us. If you look at those supporting the opposite side as you and don't think of yourself as also potentially supporting a guilty person, please take a moment to reflect. What is your goal by acting that way? To be right? To feel right? To "weed out the idiots"?

Curate your experience all you like, but cutting people off to such extremes is going to make for very small corners and very nasty echo chambers. This fandom looked itself in the mirror and got so ugly the mirror shattered and we're all just shards now. Little pods of pro-this, anti-that, unsure-something-or-other, etc. There's still so many unanswered questions, and evidence to be reviewed and cross-examined. Some of you will still choose to deny the outcome because it doesn't match the narrative in your head. But before you reach that level of desperation, I simply ask that you put your energy toward making and keeping this fandom a place where people can come for escape.

I won't judge you for being open about who you support here, if you have chosen a side. But attacking and othering people really doesn't make you the better person and you're not gonna get some kind of badge of honor for being woke. A lot of us are just people who come to fandom because it's what brings us joy in a world that is very fucked up, so coming into that space to start fires and burn bridges is really shitty. Making people feel uncomfortable to speak up because they might be attacked or cancelled for merely wanting a proper discussion is awful and I've seen enough.

For those of you who could really use a shoulder to lean on, my offer is here. I can't promise to be a perfect support, and if you're looking for some kind of mediator in an argument that won't be it. But I encourage anyone who needs to get their thoughts and feelings out to take that opportunity privately. Take a step back or a break if you feel like that's gonna help. If you're still unsure, do not hesitate to use any resource you can think of until something works. This has been hard on mental health for some people and it deserves to be acknowledged and given the attention necessary to help people recover.

I still love many people in the KinnPorsche fandom. I still love KinnPorsche. I would love things to heal, regardless of whatever comes out of this lawsuit. I would still love another season of the show if it were possible, for current and upcoming BOC projects to do well, and for the other actors and creators impacted to still enjoy happy lives and careers. I hope this post encourages thoughtfulness and honesty, and most of all, unity. If you've read this far, thanks for at least considering my input.

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for not wanting to go to a con with my bf's friend?

(I submitted this a few weeks ago but a fandom ask I sent after has already made it out so I think it got lost? if im wrong feel free to delete. this is a shortened version)

everyone in this story is 20-21. so me and my bf were making plans to go to a con and the people we both wanted to ask were all busy. he suggested one of his friends, but I wasn't sure. me and my bf and the friend all went to high school together, and we're in some discord servers together, but im not super close with her. the reason I hesitated is cons are very overstimulating for me, and if im not careful I often end up totally shutting down. im uncomfortable being seen like this except by people I very deeply trust.

one time the friend in question saw me happy flapping and she gave me a weird look, and ever since then I've been a little uncomfortable around her. I feel like I'm overreacting because it was just a look and I might've been reading it wrong but if she reacted that way to me flapping then I don't want to know how she'd react to me being completely unable to speak or move my body. she's also interrupted my infodumping in the past, which I just found really rude (discord vc, I had already been talking to my bf for several minutes before she joined the call. I was talking about flight rising and she just kept talking over me and trying to talk about a different game)

in the end, we went without her because when he finally asked her she said she was busy. I feel like I'm kind of an asshole because he kept asking if he could invite her and I kept dodging giving him a clear answer, and if he'd asked sooner maybe she would've been able to make it. going with three people instead of two would've cut the cost of the hotel room, gas, etc. I feel like im judging her too harshly for just kinda looking at me weirdly one time and interrupting me that other time

What are these acronyms?

[feroluce]

I've decided Ingo and Irida can bang once, under sex pollen circumstances, because it would be hilarious.

My ideal is that it's actually only Ingo who gets sex pollened, so poor Ingo is kind of a hot mess and meanwhile Irida is totally fine and normal and just trying to take care of her Warden. Hisui has different values and views than Unova, and Irida just. She does not care. She doesn’t see what the big deal is. She thinks Ingo is the weird one. And I think Ingo would be appalled by his own behavior later and be embarrassed about it and he's cute and funny when he's suffering through his own self-imposed Catholic Guilt akldjlafsjdlka

Ingo has some weird reaction to a pokemon attack or whatever on his way to the main settlement, so he isolates himself in an empty hut reserved for clan members from outside of the icelands. Irida eventually goes to check on him, because this is extremely unusual behavior. Ingo is typically pretty social, and as clan leader, he always goes to her to announce his arrival first thing.

Irida finds him basically in a rut, Ingo has shoved himself into a corner of the bed up against the wall and bundled up under all the blankets, all she sees at first are two silver cat eyes staring out at her. He feels weird, like he's burning up with a fever, and he can't sit still, he keeps shifting around uncomfortably. Irida asks what's up with him and Ingo takes way too long to answer, he keeps trailing off like he can barely think and just staring at her.

Irida finally declares that she knows what's wrong with him, she's seen this before! And if they leave this alone, it'll get way way worse before it gets better, but luckily Irida knows what to do for it! Ingo sags forward with relief because oh, thank goodness, he feels wretched, like the worst flu and just miserably uncomfortable, it's already been a couple hours and he can't take much more of this.

And then he sits back up and nearly keels right over again because WHY ARE YOU STRIPPING?!?!?

Irida: ??? You've seen me bare before, we've been in the hot springs together more than once?

Ingo: BUT THIS ISN'T THE HOT SPRINGS. ///

(Ingo says this facing the wall with his hand over his eyes because he turned around so fast it made him dizzy skzjskskx)

Ingo is very determinedly staring at a spot on the wall and he nearly jumps out of his skin when Irida just casually crawls up onto the bed and sits behind him. Irida tells him he can suffer through it if he really wants to, of course. She doesn't really get why he would, but she's seen people make that decision before. The clan will watch over him until it passes. Ingo asks how long it will last, because he already plans on doing so.

Irida: Days.

Ingo: ...

Irida: Several days, sometimes.

Ingo: ......

Irida: The longest recorded was maybe almost a fortnight?

Ingo: ............

It's only been hours and Ingo is already feeling desperate, and he's going to be like this for days? Possibly over a week? And Irida mentioned it would get worse? Ugh, just kill him.

But then Irida presses up against his back and even through all his clothes and the blankets, Ingo can feel her body and it's weirdly relieving for his current condition, like a heat pack on a sore muscle. Irida tells him he can do that, OR he can just let her help him. No one's ever died of this or anything, but it can get dangerous. Irida wants to help! Ingo is one of hers now. And she doesn't want to risk the life of one of her people.

Ingo doesn't really say anything, but he uncurls a little bit and stops gripping the blankets around him quite so tight, which she takes as a good sign! He has his knees drawn up to his chest, so she has to straddle his feet and lower legs a bit to make it work, but Irida manages to wedge herself between Ingo and the wall so she can at least get him to look at her and give her a straight answer. Ingo tries to start speaking a couple times, but he can't quite seem to string words together, he trails off just like earlier, staring at her like how Irida has seen people stare at the hot springs after being half frozen in the wastes of the icelands.

Irida nods and tells him physical touch is supposed to help, takes the hand that Ingo hadn't even realized he'd reached out, and sets it on her shoulder. She manages to get him to give her his other one, too, and sets it on her waist, and Ingo sighs. It really does help. It's not even that it feels good, it's just that he feels less bad.

Irida presses in closer, happily and proudly rambling poetic about how it must be a blessing of Almighty Sinnoh, that the cure for something so terrible is simply for two bodies to share the same space together so closely they interlock, isn't it nice?

The next morning, Ingo wakes up all groggy, and just kinda lays there blinking at the ceiling for several minutes until he realizes he hears someone else in the hut with him. So he rolls over and almost immediately has a fucking heart attack because there's Irida, still naked, kneeling in front of the fire and poking at with a stick trying to get it going again.

Ingo finally croaks out a quiet little please help me and Irida pats his arm and tells him of course she will. He's her Warden, he can lean on her when he needs to. 💕

She has bruises! And handprints! And oh god, did he seriously leave those bite marks on her?! NOOOOOO-

He behaved as though a depraved animal! A beast!! He shouldn't even be allowed near people anymore!!

Ingo is facing the corner, moping and red-faced and dealing with his Catholic Guilt, and meanwhile Irida is trying to decide what she wants for breakfast VSKDKXJKSKXKX

===========================

(About three weeks later, just when he's almost able to look her in the eye again, Ingo goes to Irida to report on some happening in the highlands. Irida pats him and tells him good boy. Ingo lights up and all but purrs for a second before his brain catches up like WAIT WHAT, NO.

Irida: Oh. Is that not ok? You liked being called that that one time.

Ingo, steaming red face in his hands: MY LADY, PLEASE.)

((Gaeric is unfortunately within earshot when this happens, and he laughs so hard he wheezes, and then when he and Irida depart, he slaps Ingo on the back so hard he stands straight for a few minutes afterwards ndodjwkskmdkx))

[secretgamergirl]

Is it possible to have a conversation about Trans Lifeline that isn't extremely uncomfortable?

This is, for quite a few reasons, one of those subjects it's really hard to even bring up, but you know, sometimes these things need talking about. I'm not planning to go too dark here but you know, content warning all the same.

So... Trans Lifeline is a charity organization which, on paper, primarily runs a crisis hotline explicitly for trans people, with a volunteer staff of other trans people, and on the side, dolling out small amounts of cash to people trying to get legal name and gender changes straightened out. And that's a great thing for people to set out to do. Also just getting this out there, many years ago now I did avail myself of both those services. Didn't actually end up needing the $50 or so for the name change formalizing (I'm poor enough that the probate court just waived the fee turned out), and I don't suppose I can complain about the hotline service, because while on the one hand, I'm pretty sure I was talking to someone very much out of their depth, but you know, someone answered, talked, and hey I'm still here right?

Really, that's the sort of thing that's just inherently selfless and important enough you'd have to be some kind of utterly horrible person to ever go and criticize, right? Which... kinda makes me horrible right now. See, as mentioned, they helped me out some years ago, but there's kind of an emphasis on the years ago part of that. I've had plenty of cause over the years to pass info on them to people, both the number and the grant program, and again not to get too dark but I've had reason to personally call myself here and there, lack of any sort of support network and all, and this is partially just anecdotal, but I don't know that I've actually ever heard of anyone getting in touch with anyone there in like... the past 5 years? Maybe 6?

I have been told they just will not do the grant thing for people in Canada despite advertising themselves as serving both Canada and the U.S. Which is a shame because my understanding is it's a much more painful process there (it's absurdly easy in the U.S. generally speaking, quit psyching yourselves out, go to probate court, ask for a form, then after there's another at the post office). And for quite some time now, anyone attempting to call that I've heard of hasn't reached a live person, and hasn't even been put on hold. You get a recording. The recording says everyone is busy, and their hours are from 8 AM to 2 PM Pacific time, and then the call disconnects. Which still seems to be the case when you do call in that range... and also those hours don't match what's listed on their site. And the numbers they advertise on their front page don't seen to have risen since people first really became aware of them and they started getting flooded.

And like... I'm really not trying to stir anything up here, or say they suck or something. The work they do is super important and takes a horrible emotional toll on the people doing it. I know. I've spent dozens if not hundreds of nights talking trans people down from rather immediate self-destructive thoughts, both people I knew and people I didn't. This was my whole thing a decade ago. I also have experience being on the ground floor of a charity organization that flamed out in a hurry, and which never made any sort of statement indicating it'd completely shut down, nor took down the page (to be clear- I never saw a dime of that money, and did what I personally could to explain that). My point is, I get it, stuff is hard to keep going, and hard to admit you aren't keeping going.

I'm also not putting forward the idea that TLL has secretly shut down here, but they do seem to have... severely retracted? Again, when they first got started, they were dealing with call volumes and volunteer counts where you'd maybe spend an hour on hold before getting through to someone, but you could call at the sort of times where someone is going to feel the need to call such a hotline. Now you've got this theoretical short window like, around lunchtime/early afternoon. And they close entirely on weekends apparently. And shut down for the whole back half of December, as I just look at these recent announcements on their blog. And like... I can understand being stretched thin, I'm sympathetic, but I'm also looking at this from the perspective of the people in crisis, you know?

I would argue that a crisis hotline not existing to be called at all would be preferable to reaching a point where you're calling one, and having a prerecorded message tell you they can't help and hanging up. That is THE worst thing you can hear in that position. Crisis hotlines are already something people generally only turn to as a last result when there is absolutely nobody else they can flag down to talk to in an emotionally charged moment. You're not going in expecting any sort of magical fix to your problems, just someone, even if it's an overworked stranger, who will listen and respond.

So... why am I getting into all this? Well, besides it being the 10 year anniversary of like... all my major trauma and accordingly just being in this morbid sorta headspace, I see people recommending that people call TLL all the time. People throw the number out when discussing self-destructive thoughts broadly, when they see someone directly in a crisis situation rather than try and talk them through things personally, and it's kinda like... THE organization people look to when they feel upset about the plight of trans people and want to do some charity fundraising.

It's already just bleak as hell that when people feel bad for trans people and want to throw money around, they aren't helping people get away from abusive parents, or cover medical costs, or help people replace all their clothes, or inviting people whose social circles just shrank to nothing or next to out to see movies or get dinner or anything like that, just pay people to talk to them when all of the above gets to be too much to deal with and they give up on life. But the hard reality here is, people do that, pat themselves on the back, and then when people do just collapse enough to need to make such calls, nobody picks up.

I don't really know what the fix for this is. Like I don't wanna say people need to just stop supporting TLL, because in theory they are still helping SOME people? And like, hey, I think it's an all trans staff, so you're helping at least a handful of us get by if nothing else... but it's like hearing about a bunch of people dying of thirst and the best fix anyone has is dumping buckets of water into an extremely leaky barrel and encouraging people to try and get there before it all drains out, you know? There's really a whole slew of related problems here, and I don't really see any of them getting fixed until we just kinda collectively admit that the way things stand right now, we've got an emergency plan that's just straight up not working, and brainstorm from there.