#Im so baffled like how do so many people follow me?????

[sketchy-tour]

Oh!

Hi um! I apparently hit 7k followers???? Thats??? Bananas???

Ha, though I so know not every single one of those is a real person but stilll!!!

Aaa! Guys!!!! How do I celebrate???? I got 0 ideas but like

I wanna do something!!!

[lukeskqwalker]

my line of thinking is that if i post enough untamed stuff then i'll either a) make more mdzs friends or b) lose followers and both are a lowkey a plus so

[weirdmageddon]

the shift in lore literacy in homestuck’s fandom

i was thinking about how the people who got into homestuck after it ended—whose interactions with the comic are in a static, archived state, not an ongoing thing—missed out on information that was more common knowledge in the fandom at that time. i don’t know if this is true since i’m not on tiktok, but i wouldn’t be surprised if it was. the fandom certainly isn’t the same as it was before.

ive found that many people reading homestuck now simply do not understand things in homestuck that were common knowledge back in the day, with calls for “homestuck literacy classes to become mandatory” in response to baffling takes because so many people just now seem to have glazed over the comic without absorbing important plot points, and i think i know why this may be. i ended up writing a post reflecting on my time with the comic, my perspective and how ive seen this change. i still think and write about homestuck because it still fascinates me. earlier i quote retweeted that call in my thread talking about the temporal relativity of dave and rose’s god tier ascension in the green sun, saying “my homestuck literacy is 100% so guess im doing my part as a teacher by pointing out whatever i think is really cool about it”. this post im writing now started out as a reply to this tweet i got in response.

i joined the fandom in 2013. i was 11. i had been aware of it since at least late 2011, early 2012 when my friend ryan in fifth grade told me to read it but i couldn’t get past the first few pages. i remember writing a journal on deviantart around this time (late 2011-early 2012) that was mocking people who typed like gamzee, which ironically was very karkat of me. and i remember someone on flipnote hatena i was following was making flipnotes with the alpha kids.

i dont know what caused me to flip the switch into reading it but 2013. i got into it somewhere between april (i think closer to april—i remember it being quite a span of time between the last update before HOMOSUCK dropped.) this was the most recent page the comic, meaning there was no > [S] ACT 6 ACT 6 at the bottom.

i got into it during a pause in updates, which looking into it, was the year 4 megapause. i wasn’t sure of the month until seeing the news post detailing the reason for the hiatus and the status report of the comic’s development at that time. pretty cool i could narrow it down by referencing the dates of those updates and the news post to correspond with the pause!

according to readmspa, the year 4 megapause was a 59 day hiatus from Apr 14, 2013 ==> (EOA6A5) running to 12 Jun 2013, [S] ACT 6 ACT 6. then for a few months there were the first updates that i was apart of the fandom for.

and what an exciting time during the story get into the webcomic! when the updates resumed in june, part 4 of homestuck had begun. here was a glimpse of the updates in that span of time before the next hiatus began in october.

that hiatus was none other than the gigapause, the longest hiatus in the comic, which started october 2013 and lasted for a YEAR, and i already posted about what happened on the date of return.

but here were the main events happening in the story at the time i first actually got interested in it. i wasn’t aware of the full context of them then like i am now, but i was looking at the most recent updates anyway with interest:

the alpha kids just emerged as god tiers from their slabs in derse and prospit, blown up by the condesce and caliborn / lil cal-possessed b2 jack noir.

the journey to the new session started 24 hours after jack called an early reckoning in descend—for context that was about when dave entered around midnight central time and before jade even entered. it’s pretty easy to forget that side 1 of homestuck basically happens within the span of a single day—and at this point in the story, the 3 year journey (which was also 3 real life years) had just ended. john and jade emerged from the other side of the yellow yard through the fenestrated plane on LOMAX. john’s real body was asleep upon arrival in the new session, while his dreaming projection out in the dream bubbles came across vriska’s ghost ship to learn lord english lore with vriska and aranea, and go on the treasure hunt where they found the ultimate weapon at the X mark out in in the furthest ring. in the dream john stuck his hand in the juju, started warping all over canon which removed his real body from the ship on LOMAX. he zapped around for a while but eventually zapped back to LOMAX, now awake, completely out of the loop of what everyone else is up to, and bored as fuck. what was everyone else getting up to while john was asleep?

jade was now once again within the domain of the green sun. im pretty sure her space god doggy essence comes with the power to sense what was anywhere within the domain of the session since her face looks like she arrived at that spot with intent (and she literally has jack noir’s exact powers from bec’s prototyping. also this panel). she immediately dispatched b2 jack to the edge of the incinisphere, defending the newly god-tiered jane and jake. i think even if they weren’t in any danger, she would have warped to them instantly anyway because she COULD now, and i can imagine she wouldve been sooooo eager to meet everyone. even davesprite comments about her rapid departure.

the pre-scratch refugees arrived during the only time serious shit ever went down in the nobles’ months-long inert void session. the condesce used her freak psychic bronze-cerulean powers to commune with jade’s bestial side and mind controlled her, which is super dangerous as someone with the powers of a first guardian. she then used jade’s powers to corrupt jane with the tiaratop. no funtime meetup allowed!

the trolls’ meteor with rose, dave, and the remaining trolls was pulling up into the new session with no way to slow it down. grimbark jade warped there once it was in the incinisphere and took active control. she warped everyone off the trolls’ meteor and sent them to LOMAX.

as john was losing his mind on LOMAX waiting for everyone, the meteor crew warped in. after 3 years he finally reunited with rose and dave, and at least saw the trolls in person. close curtains, end of A6A5. this was the newest [S] flash page at the time, one of my first impressions of this comic, and still one of my favorite flashes. knowing the context of the flash in the story only enhances the retrospective joy i have at getting into the comic at the time i did because it’s such an anticipated moment in the story for everyone, while for someone with no context of the story it was still enjoyable.

so that’s what was going on plotwise when i joined the fandom.

from this time, through those few months of updates and through the gigapause, i was familarizing myself with the characters in the story and overseeing the state of fanbase, getting myself acquainted with the story and wrapping my head around everything.

at that time i found that a new-ish group called colab HQ who were producing a let’s read homestuck series on youtube. hearing the voices and the pacing of it like that really, really eased me into it (maybe it was my adhd that gave me trouble actually starting it?). i caught up to a certain point using lets read homestuck and from that point was able to continue with the comic on my own, and by the time the gigapause came to a close i was fully caught up. i remember the rebranding of colab hq into voxus about a year and a half after i discovered them.

but.. back to the main point of my post. even these posts from hussie’s tumblr exist in archived states. how many new fans know about hussie’s old tumblr? i don’t know, unless theyre a new fan that must scour the internet for more deep more dives on homestuck and its fandom as a whole. but since hussie deleted his tumblr (it exists archived now on homestuck.net which, alongside from the unofficial homestuck collection, has nearly singlehandedly kept the most important relics of the fandom and lore archived), that page is not an active part of the fandom now, because it’s gone. it’s a pile of bones. it’s not living and breathing. it’s in an archived state. the whole thing is already there. homestuck and its fandom history is something you now binge instead of slowly consume and meld with as it comes out. it’s now this rapid information intake that you might forget about if you read it now instead of engaged alongside it. you’re not surrounded by people actively talking and theorizing about developments anymore. the ability to have those sorts of conversations during the ongoing development of the story reinforced concepts, ideas, and lore over and over as we tried to make sense of it.

being in a fandom when the author is still delivering the story is like nothing else. it allows you grow alongside the characters and engage meaningfully with the media and people in the fandom space around you. it feels like you’re participating IN the media itself, especially if you’re interfacing with the creator. it’s in always having something to theorize or talk about and speculate. and people become very aware of these sorts of forgotten story facts because they were applying the logic of the newest official post from hussie into making their sburb ocs or something and share resources and discussion posts about “what just happened in this update?? recap????” it was this cultural osmosis thing. i think this is why homestuck literacy is now at an all time low, at least from what i can see on twitter.

reading homestuck then vs now is like the difference between serialized shows with spaces between episodes to discuss stuff and time to reflect and learn and become attached to the story, narrative, worldbuilding and its characters, vs the netflix model where it’s all dropped all at once and people forget about it after binging.

at this point in time im getting the sense that “homestuck elders” now are no longer just people who were there since 2009-2010, but now also people who were there while it was still updating, probably stretching into 2014-2015. there are many sources of lore that were common knowledge in the fandom at the time that, since becoming susceptible to the deletion of content and link rot, and with the thanosing of mspaforums, are no longer accessible at the source. and a lot of people moved on after it ended, especially following the epilogues, the kate drama, and the whatpumpkin-sarah z drama, leaving a void of information behind if not for archivists and people such as me who continue to keep old facts relevant in discussions. my friend has called me a fandom scholar before and seeing this post i think i get what they mean.

EDIT: there is a series of video essays ive watched multiple times (because theyre that good) and they are exactly what modern fans need to see more of. they really help contextualize the comic and the themes present in it help you appreciate the basic fabric of homestuck a hell of a lot more. i highly recommend them and encourage any fan of homestuck to watch them, or someone considering getting into homestuck to watch the first one.

i think this is arguably as close to the “mandatory literacy class for homestuck” that person was talking about as you can get, especially the first video.

additionally, there is also the website https://rafe.name/homestuck which is essentially a sparknotes for homestuck and can help you follow developments in the comic itself.

[medicetwork]

Mercs if they had modern day cellphones!

Heavy:

The screen is too small and his fingers are too big.

The screen also tends to hurt his eyes after a while but he absolutely refuses to turn down the brightness, saying it would make it even harder to see than before

His main favorite functions are video calls with Medic or his family and listening to music.

His life is complete when he discovers E-books

He can’t read them on the screen but he loves being able to clean Sasha while having his favorite book read to him

Medic:

Really doesn’t use it for much else than phone calls and the occasional google search at first

When he discovers mobile games that takes his interest though!

He becomes a candy crush mom.

Oh you have a broken arm? Wellll…You can tough it out, champ. He’s on level 7,229 right now.

He would make all the other men get Life360

Scout:

Total social media zombie(I say as if I am not one)

Surprisingly he’s very popular on apps like Twitter and Tik Tok. People think he’s hilarious!

Unfortunately somewhere along the way he says something less than respectful about something and his account gets banned

Eventually he’s on account number 6 and trying to regrow his following

It never recovers

He finds out about NFT’s

Sniper:

Mainly uses it to watch youtube and play music

His phone is always on silent and Do Not Disturb

He loves those videos where those guys go out into the middle of the woods and just start building a fucking house out of clay and sticks.

He prefers texting to calling, finding it much faster(he just like me fr)

Baffled by just how much porn he has access to now….

But he’s not complaining.

Soldier:

He doesn’t use it because he just keeps breaking his phones.

They’ve been dropped, blown up, set ablaze, dropped in water, eaten by a bread-tumor monster, eaten by Soldier(???) and run over.

Even if they didn’t get destroyed within 3 days he still wouldn’t use it for much else besides setting alarms and sending confusing group texts.

However, with each new phone he has gotten he asks Pyro for stickers and sticker bombs his phone just for fun

Has an American flag wallpaper

Pyro:

Watches a lot of Youtube!

They love art tutorials, cooking tutorials and those videos with the guys that put molten hot metal balls into water and those videos of people crushing things in Hydraulic presses

Their search history is so fucking strange:

“my little pony free episode”

“my little pony movie free”

“how to draw clouds”

“gasoline cheap prices”

They follow Scout’s pages and always send him nice comments and like his videos

Engineer:

Loves listening to music and watching movies on his phone

Eventually learns how to code and make his own apps

This is also how he discovered he could jailbreak his phone and turn it into a universal remote for his sentries

Very slow texter

Uses way more emoji’s than needed

“Hello yall 👋🏻 going to the hardware store today 🔨let me know if yall need anything while im out👋🏻🚶🏼”

His most used app is the settings app

Spy:

Of course all of his phones are burners.

He never uses one for more than one week

Loves pirating movies on it and watching them in bed

He has no contacts. No personal information and keeps his location off at all times

Likes to pretend to be different people and play around with Google and Youtube’s targeted ads and algorithms

One day he’s an 86 year old woman that’s recommended nothing but metal bands and funeral home ads

The next week he’s four years old and getting recommended Mario and Minecraft let’s play videos

He uses twitter

He’s doxxed many people on Twitter

Like Scout he has MANY banned accounts and has also hacked and stolen many accounts

…He hacked one of Scout’s accounts and got it permanently banned

Demoman:

Loves watching Top 10 videos

Also loves having so much ease and access talking to his lads

He video calls his mother often even she just nags him the whole time and keeps accidentally hanging up

Is frequently texting the other team’s Soldier and laughing at what he says back

Uses Discord and Reddit and is in many servers and communities that focus on paranormal activity, urban legends and cryptids

Actually makes his own youtube videos searching for said cryptids

Frequently comments “cringe” under Scout’s posts

[blommp717]

I try to follow what you are saying, but I find your content confusing, and based on some of your repeat asks, I’m not the only one. The way you explain ND could use improvement, in my opinion. Maybe it’s because English isn’t your first language or because your understanding of ND is more theoretical than experiential—it seems like both. This is fine, but have you considered improving your English (or teaching in your mother tongue and paying a professional translation service?) and actually living in the ND state of being (not just reading or watching videos about it) before attempting to teach in a language you seem to struggle with? You could be more successful and less misleading.

There’s a lot of misunderstanding and inaccuracies in your writings, and your pinned post gives the impression that you aren’t the type of person to humbly take advice and cultivate self-awareness. Which in and of itself doesn't really reflect what one would expect from a guru or someone who has reached a profoundly deep nondualistic understanding and wishes to guide others. You seem bothered by critique or questions that you haven't already read the answer to. Maybe you could sincerely cultivate Self-awareness of how you are appearing to people who have genuinely experienced the ND state of being, not just an intellectual understanding, and those who have not. Maybe I’m wrong (I very well could be), but it seems like you read about it but haven’t actually had experiences beyond reading and thinking about it. It feels shallow and without real rooting in experience, not just theoretical knowledge. This is just a humble observation from another seeker on the path, so take it with many grains of salt. May you find equanimity and authentic awakening and be of genuine assistance to others. Peace.

I most definitely think you’re coming from a space of aggression instead of actually trying to inquire firstly, moving forward. I don’t really get how people asking questions is an indicator of me not knowing what I’m really talking about as opposed to people learning to accept how easy it is. Allot of these people come from LOA so they think there’s a process, they think there’s work to do, so having such a drastic shift will obviously not feel easy at first 🤭and secondly I’m baffled about the language comment, I have zero clue what makes you think that kind of stuff is okay to say to anyone, regardless of if it’s true or not, please seek some humanity and get it together. You don’t want to be saying all of that b.s to the wrong person. I reallllyy hope you don’t act like this in person with anyone.

Alright so, to what the actual focus of your text should have been.

If you notice, my pinned post was allot more recent than when I started posting, it was more of a response to someone claiming I’m giving false hope and that explaining the idea of “manifestation” alongside non-duality is wrong. Which I’m literally not, im not sure if your truly following up on what I’ve posted because I make it very very clear since the beginning and almost in every post with a long ask that I. Am. Not. Teaching. You. How. To. Manifest. There’s absolutely no such thing, it might look like it and feel like it but it’s not. I even have a post where the entire thing is me talking about why there’s no such thing as manifestation. And I have zero clue where you got any of that information about who I am as a person from that post alone when all I’m stating is how I’m not going to stop helping people? 😭😭

I think another confusion people who “enter” NonDualism have is they think awakening is real. You told me to reach a state of ND being or the State of ND which I’m not really sure what you mean by that because it doesn’t exist. It’s sadly time to burst the bubble. There is no awakening, if you truly understand nonduality, there is no journey, there’s no goal, there nothing that you can do to achieve enlightenment because it doesn’t exist, these are concepts and ideas self realized to give the “self” and “I” a reason to exist. I perfectly well understand what nonduality at its core is and have hundreds of what I’m sure people would call “succes stories” with it. My old posts have plenty of explaining as to what, just, no duality states regardless of getting what you want. How can there be a journey? There is no self thst has a journey, just ideas and thoughts spinning together in a flurry and naming it “self”. You don’t exist.

And for you, you want to understand no duality? I’m going to try not to be cryptic but here we go. You can’t and neither can I , no one can understand and seek, you’re not a seeker and there is no path, this is the truth. And no one can have a journey because there is no identity in any of this, there is no self as a person, there is no “me” on a “path”, there is no “one” here who understands anything. It’s all self actualizing thoughts making it seem like there is a journey, the “I” or what people call ego, needs purpose to exist. It feels like a threat when everything is dissolved. The idea that there is more to do, will be true for as long as you pretend it is. And without the false idea of a journey this “self”or “me” loses its purpose. It can be “hard” to accept but truly it doesn’t matter because the nature of existence will not change. Think about it why does the idea of something higher, a bigger step, some grand moment seem so enticing? And for who does it seem so enticing for? The false identity, the “me” the “self”. It’s just another story. You might sit and be, it may lead you deeper into sensations in the body and most likely a “profound” sense of understanding, but quite honestly if your looking for a tiny spark of magic to keep you going on and thinking there’s even more and even more to experience, it would be absolutely useless.

You are already all, whats there to find

Understanding nonduslity is realizing, how can any of this be more grand if there is only one, how can more be achieve if there is a constant state of nonduality? How can the illusion reach a higher state… the higher state is also just illusory, the self, body and world is just illusory. You as everything are pretending to be a person pretending a self and pretending that this person is also self and needs to understand and reach more profound states of being.

This is how “manifestation” is possible. There is no one and nothing “happening” all there appears to be is what you appear as, it’s hollow, almost like a projection. This can’t be turned off, you appear as all there is and as long as the body is here thoughts will appear, ideas will appear, visualizations will appear, you take it as just thinking or talking to yourself or daydreaming or predicting what might happen next, but that’s all what “manifesting” is. In every timeless moment (instant is not fast enough so I say timeless) stories are realized, you take it effortlessly as how your life is. Simple things like how you expect your parents to respond to you not picking up their phone, or what kind of day at your gonna have at school to literally everything, it’s constant, it’s everything, it’s always “on”. Your luck, the compliments you receive, how things work or don’t work out for you, all of it. This is not just life as it is but the entire “manifestation” it’s an experience of what “it” (you) appears as. And if all is what you are and the appearance relies on the perception of the appearance, then perceiving any type of story like, having brown eyes but you want blue. Okay, “I have blue eyes” this is not an affirmation, this is a truth, this is what “ “ (you) now appear as, timelessly, and needing proof or evidence is useless as it puts the attention back at “has it changed it”. If you understand its all you, you also know needing evidence or proof is truly completely useless. “But I checked the mirror and my eyes are still brown” with what understanding did you move to the mirror with. An expectancy of brown eyes? Hmm.

Well I think this is getting long winded, I’m not gonna make this even longer than it is, hopefully you find some clarity in this and I strongly urge you, before making random comments or being just rude, ask yourself with what state of mind am I moving forward. Do I really need to say it this way? Because truly, I’ll remain here doing what I do, I’m incredibly grateful that I can be able to help so many people so it brings me a sense of joy (though unreal 🤭). But I hope you understand there is a proper way to question and criticize, and well, your claims feel like they were based off reading 2 posts and calling it a day 😭😭. Anyways I actually will thank you regardless, I’m sure many people can learn from what you’ve initiated me to explain, have a great life, I hope to see you come again in future posts 🫶🫀🪷🪷☀️

[i-am-a-l0st-gh0st]

Why do I let myself dream like this?-Wriothesley x reader Flufftober

"But perhaps its just my stupid head in end" T/w- reader has a bad past Summary- Wriothesly can see something is up with you. No matter how much you try and hide it.

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Wriothesley had loved you since the moment he saw you, despite you being a prisoner in the fortress of Menopide. He had done his best to keep his distance from you but couldn’t help but see you everywhere at the cafeteria, the boxing ring and the workplace. How you had caught it continued to baffle him, maybe it was your beauty or your kindness. How could someone like you get sent down here?

Wriothesley had done a little background research on you as he does with everyone. He found out a few unexpected things about you. You were orphaned at a young age and sent to live with a foster family who wasn’t very good. So you took to the streets. Stealing and fighting just too by, and somehow through all of that you remained happy and cheerful. Or so he thought.

One night a fellow inmate caught you crying, and soon many others were giving you pity looks. Including the duke. So you kept your head down and kept working. No one would bother you right as long as you kept to yourself.  

“Hey, it's y/n right?”

You jumped from the deep voice that came behind you. “A-ah yeah..” Ah shit it was the duke you could hardly squeak out words

“Could I speak to you for a moment? In my office?”

“Of course sir…”

You followed closely behind him and as you were walking you could see people whisper things about the two of you. Maybe some secret affair was going on like some thought. Or maybe he really did just want to talk to you. 

In his office sat a desk in the middle of the room. With four bookshelves, two on either side, about a third of the way up the wool. In Between the middle bookshelves, there was something that looked to be a massive cog on the wall. A staircase leading somewhere also was right side as you walked in. The office itself was a tad bit plant but overall comforting.

“What was it you needed to talk to me about sir?”

“No need for the for formalities, just Wriothesley will do. And just something in regards to what the other inmates have been saying recently,”

He looked you directly in your e/c eyes and he said: “I know you are not okay y/n. I've done some reading on you and from what I can see, you’ve had a rough go.”

Tears started to well up in your eyes, “Sir im fine-”

“I can see you are not, and you know if you do need to talk I am here.”

“Thank you kindly.”

“Now how would you like to stay for some tea.”

This was the closest Wriothesley was going to get to a date with you. Or was it.

“That would be lovely thank you.”

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@pandragonsoul

[prettyboykatsuki]

warm-ups | sfw + rin + meeting

✭ tags ; established relationship, rin is a lovesick tsundere fool, fluff | ✭ wc ; 1.3k

✭ a/n ; im like two seconds away from taking rin off of my prompt wheels give someone else a chance im begging.

Ever since Itoshi Rin started dating you, nothing has gone his way.

Admittedly, he knows this is because he's had no control over the situation. It's a lesson he's been forced to learn so many times over it's starting to make him sick. He can't control his feelings no matter how tightly and how forcefully he holds onto them and that knowledge is something he resents everyday.

Even after aging out of his worst angsty teenage years, no amount of time has been able to soften his dislike for the idea of vulnerability. He was a sensitive, gentle sort of kid. After the incident with Sae (and the period of isolation from self-loathing that followed it), he wasn't really able to bounce back to that place. Sometimes it feels like a strange and vague dream that he only recalls when his mother reminisces about it.

The idea was in and of itself baffling. It wasn't like he was some patron saint back then either. He's always been single-minded in his own interest and involved more with his own shit than he was with other peoples.

The thing about feelings that Rin has always hated the most is how much they interact with other people. His feelings are his sure, but when things make him feel some kind of way, there's only so much he can do to snub them out. He can't get a grasp of them reasonably. They're so slippery and frustrating and agitating.

And he's tried for longer than he cares to admit to let go of them completely. But Rin, no matter how much he tries, can't be like Sae. That blasé attitude that makes everything seem like it rolls of Sae's shoulders isn't one Rin can afford. Even after some growing up and some growth and the begrudging friends he's made in the process - he never quite recovers from that truth.

At the very least, Rin figures it'd be easier if he could let himself be unaffected.

It doesn't work out that way, because when do things ever. And it becomes especially prominent in the process of falling in love.

How he's gotten into a relationship is a mystery he's yet to to solve. Rin can't think of any good reason you're dating him. Of course, if prompted he'll roll his eyes. But more candidly, he has no idea how that's worked out.

There's plenty about you that is objectively likable, though. You're nurturing and friendly and coaxing sometimes to the point of being pushy. In the process of getting to know you, he's been struck with how much you make him feel safe. Betrayal is a sore spot, he figures.

Rin trusts you with himself. He knows that even if everything burned to the ground tomorrow - you wouldn't ever air it out to the world. Not for a check or even if you hated him.

He has enough self-awareness to know that he's subpar in the emotions department. What you see in Rin is so often a mystery. Though when he works up the nerve to hint at reassurance, you kiss his cheek and sigh all lovey-dovey

("Dunno," You whisper, all warm hands and sweet touches. He hopes you don't ever figure it out "I can tell how much you love me though."

Rin scoffs. Of course he does. "You wish.")

He didn't fall in love with you on the path of least resistance. In fact, there are multiple instances where he outright sabotaged himself in the process. By being too cruel or too cold or callous.

But, because Rin never has things go his way, trying to leave it alone failed too. In fact every time you came back to him, he felt a feeling struck so deep in his heart that he couldn't look it in the face. Every time you came back and loved him so gently, he spoke a tiny and silent prayer.

Don't leave me too.

Not that Rin would ever admit that. To himself. To anyone for the record. But some part of him always hoped that he could keep you.

You've stayed, somehow. Long enough for your lives to become intertwined. He'd rather die before telling you he has to look at pictures of you before falling asleep on away games.

For better or for worse, it's all spiraled out of control. Now you're a year in and you live together. You even have a black cat (with blue eyes, which he has mixed feelings about.)

And right now, you're humming happily in his front seat and waiting to meet his friends. Something Rin would never in his entire life set-up on purpose.

But like he's said so many times before, things never work out how he wants them. And Isagi (like the backstabbing snake he is) has gone out of his way to invite you to lunch with his other teammates. Those guys are hardly his friends.

"I'm excited to meet your friends," You say, buzzing. He scoffs as he pulls into the parking lot, glancing over at you.

"They're not my friends."

"Rinnie. Baby, give it a rest. You spend more time with them than you do me, okay? Don't be silly."

Rin frowns, watching as you fix your appearance up in the mirror. He turns the ignition off and leans back with his arms crossed.

"Either way, I don't see why you're so excited."

"So I can get the autographs of a lot of handsome men who play soccer," You quip, knowing it's going to agitate him "Obviously because they're important to you. I want them to like me."

He thinks you're the last person that should ever worry about that.

"It doesn't matter to me what they think." He says, this time a little softer. You grin, pausing in your actions. You lean over the glovebox to nudge him and he turns himself to be close to you.

You're so close to him, smiling with all your teeth. He sighs.

"Aw, geez. You saying you don't care as long as you like me, right? How sweet of you."

Rin has to suppress a smile. He is disgusted with himself momentarily.

"I just think they're idiots." He lies, quite blatantly. You giggle, leaning forward. Your hand reaches up to the nape of his neck gently, sliding to his cheek. Your noses bump and Rin wants to turn the car back home and keep you all to himself. He wants to go home and sleep with you in his bed, with your cat rumbling around.

He wants to be all alone with you for an entire lifetime and he thinks it's gonna ruin him if he can't. He examines you closely. You look too nice for the general public to lay eyes on you.

"Don't be so mean, 'kay? Thanks, anyways, though."

You kiss Rin like you love him. Gingerly and playfully and whole-heartedly. Rin kisses back in the only way he knows how - clumsily and intensely and with the weight of a million unspoken desires. There's enough warmth in you for his cold, dead heart it seems.

And he is just not selfless enough to let go of it for any reason.

"You look pretty today," He says in a stupor, with just enough adoration in his system left to make him not wince. You grin big.

"You're so sweet to me."

Rin can be sweeter. Later, when you're home, he'll see if he can please you a little more.

He goes to kiss you one more time, but it gets cut short by a familiar screech.

"Everyone look! Rin is being all lovey-dovey."

The sound of Bachiras' voice makes a pang of irritation run through his entire body. He pulls away and glares through the window as his so-called friends crowd around his vehicle ooo-ing and aah-ing. He's going to fucking kill them.

He hears you from beside break out into a laugh then relents, just a little.

Nothing seems to go his way with you around, sure. But it's not like Rin particularly minds.

[sideblogdotjpeg]

feeling like. ep 60 was such a fantastic arc finale battle ep. and auugh. like so many things. LIKE .

the slow build up of tension over the ep felt really good and perfect, as it escalates from alexandrite being silly and goofy to. gargantuan cyberflesh horror. and how the dice were UNCANNILY perfect for it all. like. the nat 1 vs nat 20 roll for the town and suddenly the entire mood shifts and the stakes are so much realer, and personal. followed up by the nat 20 for the town! followed up by TWO callie crits and her dealing 130 DAMAGE like each turn!!!! like!!!!! AUGH... the. just the beats of it all was soo good and.

tying to that .. the character moments for this ep were so good !!! every character got their moment to shine in the battle. already discussed callie absolutely whomping fucking ass, but of course the smaller moments as well. offering to go and defend calders town. seeing the faewild sky and "i think i needed to leave to become worthy of it" - like and as the culmination of callies arc. from someone who was so scared and running away to. staying, standing, fighting, protecting. AND ITS GOOD.

then of course theres calder. i mean also the . ARC. of the only thing he wanted was not to be overprotected. wanting to be useful - like his brothers, people who had strength and value in the eyes of their people, big enough to defend their town. and he has come all the way here. he changes the tides of the battlefield in the town - and he does it with the attachments of his friends and the love of his family. and like... god. really crystalising his ethos in a way that is foiled so well against gowan. gowan who was too proud to ask for help. vs "i cant do it without you" "but damn does it feel good when your friends have your back" ... !!!! AYYEARGH. like. hes becoming the protector of his home! but maybe now, his home is so much bigger than the ice knife, and hes not fighting alone .... YOU KNOW.

AND SOL!!!!! sol to my knowledge only deals 30 damage this battle but. as a resident sol enjoyer i !!! am VERY MUCH CLAPPING AND CHEERING!! at the deeply supportive role he took on for this fight. like hes the first to get the ice knife away from alexandrite, he gives callie an extra smite, silvery barbs.... ! like the short rest realisation of how different the battle wouldve gone without that silvery barbs is .... ! SO ITS GOOD. and at the end that he was the one to get the final blow on alexandrite and it was for swag is ...

and! that part was obviously a joke! as is the entire "keep em guessing haha alexandrite cant predict what were doing!!!" thing. HOWEVER. relistening to the ezry arc, and their first interaction w alexandrite as we now know her ... i just. REALLY feel like this is the spiritual successor to "were duck team and were messy and were friends and we do everything together and we absolutely suck shit all day long and all night baby". theyre so fucking stupid is the thing. and theyre messy and stupid and constantly saying things that are weird and make no sense and completely and utterly baffling .... and thats DUCK TEAM!!! (theres also a point here where im overreading somewhat. but the part about Keepin em Guessin... one could POSSIBLY argue it interacts in a MAYBE DEEPLY INTERESTIGN WAY with . the idea of the calculated certainty of the AI, the calm and cold prediction of the diviners, and the wild freedom of the peregrines. idk!!! maybe!!! maybe you cld even say that what lies at the heart of duck team is their messiness and outofplaceness and love and care and refusal of the tragedy!!! even!! maybe!! but YEAH. lol random XD ! keep em guessin!)

also the thing that made me write all this which is like. ! the final victory lap scene is just. so wonderfully cathartic, esp with how tense this entire arc has been. its just. fuck yeah we won and all our friends and family are here and safe and riding on mammoths!!! i mean. FUCKING ALBINS BACK!!!! GREGORS HERE AND KICKIN ASS!!! THE MA GOBLIN BRIGADE!!! A WIN. and ... that bit of callie just sitting on the roof playing a guitar as she stares into the fae wild sky is ... its good.. its good..

and all that is maybe. half the reasons why ep 60 is so good. i didnt even get around to talking about the fucking EMILY AXFORD SONG WHICH IVE BEEN PLAYING NONSTOP ALL DAY SO. yeah. so i like this ep i guess

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

tuesday again 8/6/2024

people mad at a video game for being woke, i'm mad at it for not being woke enough. so it goes.

also i wrote a yeehawgust fic

listening

another addition to the "SOMEBODY COME FUCK THIS (GAY)" playlist, thank u charli xcx and billie eilish

-

reading

im still really annoyed with Retraction Watch for platforming a terf last year and then not doing any sort of sockpuppet damage control in the comments. since they got acquired by crossref they've done way less guest editorials. not to be all "stick to sports!" but stick to sports, retraction watch.

they did introduce me to this substack series i will be following with great interest about the rise and fall of hindawi. wiley acquired a paper mill a few years back, bc they seemingly did zero diligence, and then blithely ignored the problem for two years before being forced to do the single largest retraction of papers in scientific publishing history, somewhere above ten thousand articles because it is STILL ONGOING.

i do love following various retractions bc i like seeing what finally made someone go "wait a minute", and, as i have just written in a cover letter, "I studied astronomy and have held several data jobs because I’m fascinated with how and why systems work and fail..."

-

watching

my best friend has decided while i'm at her home in the evenings eating her food and bothering her children (for my mental health, it is very important i am fed tiny bits of mushed up banana by hand by her one-year-old), our new project is watching all the xmen movies. i have no particular desire to do this or special affinity for the xmen, and i would like to keep eating very good texmex and bothering her children (for my mental health, it is very important i play hot wheels with the five-year-old). this sounds so super bitchy of me but it's hard to convey that these are essentially on for background noise.

saw the first two. the two things i know about them are that hugh jackman is in them and they're at the statue of liberty in one

-

playing

an ideologically baffling little environmental game free in the epic store this week, LumberJack. this is on PC and Switch for $13, which is far more money than the playtime anyone can get out of this game. tiny tiny tiny little Spain-headquartered studio without an active website, it looks like one guy hired out to make this and two more games and then went back to single-dev projects. i can respect that!

steam reviewers are mad at this game for being woke, and i'm mad at it for being woke in a very strange way. your one mechanic, as a bear, is swinging a big axe to remove cars and trailer offices and portapotties and various garbage from the landscape.

i wish the movement and look controls are inverted, and i wish they weren't, or at least had an option to make them normal. i know Why this isn't a mobile game (can't monetize something with twoish hours of gameplay and twenty levels) but it's a very straightforward and simple game that would translate very well to mobile. much like donut county.

now for being picky about the political mindset of the developers: as much fun as it is to be a bear swinging an axe around, lumberjacks are not the people i associate with wild preservation movements.

saving the land and turning it back into pristine and perfect land for wild animals in this game looks like erasing every hint of human activity from a site and turning it into sheer recreational use. many levels are heavily polluted, but some can definitely be read as recycling centers. im confused by the erasing every hint of humans in early levels, and then this level where you break down a radio station, slap the host with your axe, and she turns into a park ranger who starts gardening and taking care of chickens?

i don't think that removing all the traces of people from the landscape will magically fix everything, nor do i think simply being in unspoiled wilderness will magically fix me.

there's a golfing level where you whack bombs into various small buildings. i think golfing to save the environment is a strange choice to make for designing a game.

i also briefly thought this bird in every level was an extinct ivory-billed woodpecker, which was a little alarming bc there are some real nutjobs out there with very strong beliefs about this bird and government overreach and how much the government is lying to you about the extinctness of various animals.

i stopped playing about halfway through bc i was not having fun and found the underlying environmental message a little confused. they've managed to sell at least 10k units which is...not very good. i am not surprised this is free on epic, and i wonder what their payout for that was. would not be surprised if they negotiated a payment to their nonprofit partner ecologi as part of that.

-

making

yeehawgust fill! i have another bitchy blond babygirl!

what the fuck is the prisoner? cult 60s british spy tv. with all the surreality and anxieties about the cold war and midcentury psychological horror you could possibly want

He’d been drugged enough times to recognize the splitting migraine rapidly galloping down his neurons. “Where am I?” He fought down the taste of bile (ketamine? xylazine, by the aftertaste) and the rising panic. Oddly enough, the migraine was always worse with veterinary sedatives. One would think a mind would adapt to nearly three hundred years of irregular drugging and constant experiments. One’s body had adapted and ghoulified, but in equally unhelpful ways. The tycoon flickered, approximating an appraising blink. “This meeting has been a long time coming, hasn't it? You've come a long ways, literally and, I suspect, figuratively as well. You’re in the Free Economic Zone of New Vegas.” They’d pretended the prisons were so many different places: across the Continent, in various parts of London, up and down and all around the East Coast of these wretched States. Rarely this far west, aside from the awful escapade in the faux pre-War Western town. “What do you want?” He managed to swing his ankles off the saddle (also pre-War? Heavily used. It certainly wasn’t his, the equestrian event had always been his worst event in the pentathalon) and jolted what felt like every half-dead nerve in his half-dead body.

[zvtara-was-never-canon]

what zutaras have you been interacting with? because the ones i know- we actually like aang, we just don’t like how he was written.

what’s more, since they’re taking out what made us dislike kataang in the live action, i wouldn’t mind it either. don’t get me wrong, I’d still rather no ships happen at the end of atla, but if they wrote kataang in a way that works, im fine. a lot of other zutara shippers share this sentiment, it just baffles me to hear that people in my community are just so rotten yk.

"What zutaras have you been interacting with?" Entitled ones that I often never even wanted to start a conversation with and that always kept coming back no matter how many times I blocked them. And it wasn't two or three people, there were literally DOZENS, and pretty much everyone I've talked with had a simmilar experience.

And I'll give you the benefit of the double since you seem to want to have a conversation in good faith, but I'm not lie, I've learned to be VERY suspicious of the line "I do/would like Aang, it's just the way he was written that bothers me" because it's nearly always followed by list of supposed issues in the writting that are either exagerated or full on made up, often being contradicted by the writting itself.

"Aang doesn't take his responsibility as the Avatar seriously, Aang doesn't respect Katara's culture, Aang is basically a toddler, Aang is selfish, Aang is a RAPIST" All of these false AND things I've seen zutarians that claim to just have an issue with how he was written use as justification.

Again, not saying that's your case, but I hope you can understand why that line makes me go:

[hell-fm]

Im so happy that the hazbin tumblr niche found me! tumblr is my preferred platform, but as an artist twitter is oftentimes more lucrative. So I apologize for not being as active here as I could be. But thank you for following me.

Another reason why I’m more on twitter is the nsfw content. (This is me courageously coming out as a nsfw artist)

I see a lot of people here have very strong opinions on nsfw content with Alastor and I think having an opinion about that as an ace person is more than valid. But as an aroace spec person myself who mostly processes romance and sex through fanwork, I find myself increasingly frustrated with the fact that my peers (other aroace artists) and I are being accused of doing something *bad* by expressing ourselves and our sexuality through fanart with Alastor.

I understand the discomfort and I understand the boundary and I support that. But I want you to know that I’m not agreeing with the notion that we are responsible for ignorant views on aroace people. Instead of us drawing porn being considered a bad thing, we could use this opportunity to remind ourselves that the ace spectrum is very diverse and people have varying levels of feelings of discomfort or comfort with sex?

I even heard ace people make fun of the explanation *but ace people can have sex* and I personally don’t understand why we even bother to educate people properly if we can’t even agree on this within our own circle…? Why do we explain how sex and relationships /can/ work to allsexuals when we then police each other in a safer space such as fandom? It baffles me.

And I also had my own issues with my aroace spec identity for a long time, had ignorant views for a LONG time and have found some nsfw content with Alastor to be very healing and even empowering way of story telling for aroace people. (Especially @prince-liest fanfics!!!)

Look, fandom is a space where people express themselves and we all express ourselves differently and in a flawed way. I know that fandom is currently in a commercialization era where people legitimately make their income through fanwork, companies try to fandomify their franchises and thus there’s way more public attention on fans and what fans do, but that doesn’t mean that we have to compromise. Especially if we’re noncommercial. We are not responsible for other people’s perceptions when there’s enough educational content out there.

That being said, I obviously understand the frustration, I especially feel frustrated when I notice that a lot of fancontent turns Alastor allosexual because it’s more convenient for the ship. For me, even if I draw something that hints at romance or is straight up porn, I always pull from my own feelings and experiences of romance and sex to depict Alastor. Sure, that’s always going to be a bit ooc, but at least it still feels like him. So I get why people feel annoyed. But at the same time I don’t see the logic and necessity to make harsh accusations or judgements. Many years ago I’ve met people irl that I had harsh opinions about online and realized they are very different from how I perceived them based on their content. So now I’m trying to always keep that in mind, everyone is a person behind these accounts and everyone has different perceptions of media, life and interpersonal relationships. Sometimes aroace people themselves fall into the trap of depicting an ace character in an allo way, because those are the romance tropes we grew up with and all know and many people don’t even understand how it can work differently. It’s -simply put- a skill issue. I also think it’s unfair that people have to come out to justify themselves (which is why I came out even though I’m very uncomfortable with being out), you never know if the person doing the art is ace or not and you shouldn’t make assumptions.

I think the responsibility put upon fanartists is simply unfair and it is a double standard, because nobody talks this much shit about fanfics. It is not our fault that algorithms make it so that content gets pushed more that might not be the best representation. Keep the flawed social media systems in mind that show you stuff that isn’t for you in the first place.

This was a very long post that I only made to be very open and frank about the fact that I also draw nsfw content and don’t agree with this form of fandom policing. I respect boundaries and if people want to block me for my take on this, that’s valid.

[menelaiad]

Agamemnon is explicitly stated to be hot/muscular. It's in the source material. Books 2 and 3 in particular. I highly doubt being compared to the Gods meant being "chubby" or super old. The ancient text obviously wouldn't say "ripped" because that wasn't in their vocabulary. But they refer to him as everything else that such a body would imply.

And Achilles was saying things in anger in Book 1. Everyone forgets how in Book 23, Achilles pretty much retracts everything he said and claims Agamemnon is the best natural warrior which he was.

tldr; im a petty bitch

y'all are SO PRESSED ON THIS LMAOOO I'M CRYING

'ripped' isn't in their vocabulary?? but 'hot' and 'muscular' are? really?

AGAIN about your last point, cause people who are so pressed about this just keep ignoring it: YOU CAN BE A WARRIOR. AND NOT BE CONVENTIONALLY 'RIPPED'. NOTHING ABOUT A HUMAN BEING - A HUMAN MAN HAVING A SLIGHT TUMMY WILL STOP HIM BEING ABLE TO RUN, FIGHT, KILL PEOPLE AND BE A WARRIOR. YOUR WEIGHT IS NOT AN AUTOMATIC INDICATOR OF YOUR FITNESS LEVEL/ABILITIES.

that's y'alls prejudice about larger people coming through. this stupid belief that the ancient world represented 'the peak masculine alpha ideal' no????? this whole 'if man strong and can stab and have sex with woman then man must be muscley and ripped cause that make man sexy' like shut up.

it's baffling to me that you're all so heated on this. the mere thought of a human man having a tummy is sending you all west. you can't cope. a human man who consumed copious amounts of alcohol (because ancient greeks just did???) and probably had a very rich diet. having tummy??? NO. ILLEGAL.

im sorry but im cracking up over here. i couldnt care less whether people think aga has a 16-pack, that he's skinny as a twig, that he's fat, that he's not, that he's somewhere in between - idc. but your adamancy against 'slight tummy' aga. is just ..... fatphobic. and i never thought i'd type that word out being a fucking classics blog lmaooo.

i have shared so many DUMB opinions on this blog. from menelaus' teeth to odyssues' hairy feet and yet the thing that gets the most reaction from people - is agamemnon's weight.

that's what's pissing me off. everything else? whatever have your own opinion, you weird menelaus girl. but the sECOND i say why i think i character might be a lil chubby OOF ouTRAGE. IM A FOOL.

also your point is just so incredible. my issue isn't with you thinking aga was a ripped sex god crafted by aphrodite herself. it's your use of the word 'explicitly' cause aga's size (in regards to his weight) is NEVER explicitly stated ANYWHERE. so we're both just having our own opinions. but mine has got you so pressed????

i own a couple translations of the iliad. lets look at some. and see the descriptions of aga, shall we? cause i know exactly which sections you mean in book 2 and 3. contrary to your apparent belief, i have read the iliad.

we'll do book 2 first to make it all easier to follow:

PETER GREEN

“among them the lord Agamemnōn, in eyes and head like Zeus who delights in the thunderbolt, like Arēs in girth, and with the chest of Poseidōn. As one steer in a herd of cattle stands out, far above them all— the bull, distinguished among the cows assembled round it— such a one on that day Zeus rendered Atreus’s son, preeminent among many, of heroes the foremost.”

... again. nothing really? girthy??? eyes like zeus (nice)??? tall??? nothing about weight here babes.

CAROLINE ALEXANDER

there to go into combat, and with them was lord Agamemnon— his eyes and head like Zeus who hurls the thunderbolt, his girth like Ares, his chest like Poseidon’s. As when an ox stands out from all others in the herd, a bull who is preeminent among the gathered cattle, so did Zeus on that day render the son of Atreus conspicuous amid the multitude, outstanding among warriors.

pretty much the same?? gets called an 'ox' here though. ooooh

ROBERT FAGLES.

and there in the midst strode powerful Agamemnon, eyes and head like Zeus who loves the lightning, great in the girth like Ares, god of battles, broad through the chest like sea Lord Poseidon. Like a bull rising head and shoulders over the herds, a royal bull rearing over his flocks of driven cattle — so imposing was Atreus' son, so Zeus made him that day, towering over fighters, looming over armies.

just more girth stuff. that can mean his shoulders?? his chest?? his ass? bro we don't know. was aga just THICC. his cheeks always alerting the trojans???

ROBERT FITZGERALD.

Agamemnon's lordly mien was like the mien of Zeus whose joy is lightning; oalken-waisted as Ares, god of war, he seemed, and deep-chested as Lord Poseidon, and as a great bull in his majesty towers supreme amid a grazing herd, so on that dav Zeus made the son of Atreus tower over his host, supreme among them.

i like this one tbf. this one has got more meat on it. 'oaken waisted'. nice nice. again. i don't see oak trees are particullarly 'narrow' but hey. interpretation is what makes this field so great.

RICHARD LATTIMORE

“powerful Agamemnon, with eyes and head like Zeus who delights in thunder, like Ares for girth, and with the chest of Poseidon; like some ox of the herd pre-eminent among the others, a bull, who stands conspicuous in the huddling cattle; such was the son of Atreus as Zeus made him that day, conspicuous among men, and foremost among the fighters.”

STANLEY LOMBARDO

To enter battle, and Lord Agamemnon Moved among them like Zeus himself, The look in his eyes, the carriage of his head, With a torso like Ares', or like Poseidon's. Picture a bull that stands out from the herd Head and horns above the milling cattle— Zeus on that day made the son of Atreus A man who stood out from the crowd of heroes.

SEE this one we're not even talking about his LITERAL appearance but how he's holding himself. how he acts. his CONFIDENCE. cool take, stan. i like it.

STEPHEN MITCHELL

“and among them was Agamemnon, his splendid eyes and head like almighty Zeus’s, his thighs like the thighs of Ares, his chest like Poseidon’s. As a bull stands out in a herd above all the others, sovereign among the cows as they graze in a field: just so, on that day, did Lord Zeus make Agamemnon supreme over all the warriors massed before Troy.”

LOVE the thigh mention Mitchell. nice nice.

'The ancient text obviously wouldn't say "ripped" because that wasn't in their vocabulary. But they refer to him as everything else that such a body would imply.'

bro all i'm getting is the word 'girthy'?? if you want me to be a bitch about it, that's not a word i'd put with someone who is 'ripped'. if anything, they're implying he got junk in his trunk. i truly hand on heart. cannot see anything in the book 2 translations that imply or indicate to me that he does not have a tummy. that he is rocking a six pack. WHICH IS FINE. we can play with it and form our own opinions. but you're THIS IMPLIES .... is wrong??? it doesn't imply anything dude????

all we can infer from any of the book two stuff is that he's a man who is larger than the other men around him - literally? metaphorically? we dont know. (which is all horseshit anyway cause priam later goes on to say he's a short arse which is helpful). and that he shares qualities with the gods. again, literally? metaphorically? bit of both? we. don't. know.

TIME FOR BOOK 3. the priam and helen thirst.

PETER GREEN

“and to put a name for me to that huge warrior down there, that Achaian leader, of such stature and so strong: others there may be taller still by a head, and yet so fine a man have I never set eyes on, nor one so majestic in bearing—he looks to be of royal blood.” helen later calls him a 'strong spearman'

CAROLINE ALEXANDER

tell me the name of this gigantic man, who is this Achaean man, good and great? To be sure there are other men even greater in height, but I have never beheld with my eyes a man so handsome, nor so majestic; for he seems a kingly man. helen later calls him a 'powerful spear-warrior'

ROBERT FAGLES

“ tell me the name of that tremendous fighter. Look, who's that Achaean there, so stark and grand? Many others afield are much taller, true, but I have never yet set eyes on one so regal, so majestic . . . That man must be a king!” helen later calls him a 'strong spearman'

ROBERT FITZGERALD

Come, tell me who the big man is out there, who is that powerful figure? Other men are taller, but I never saw a soldier clean-cut as he, as royal in his bearing: he seems a kingly man. helen later calls his a 'formidable warrior'

RICHARD LATTIMORE

“You could tell me the name of this man who is so tremendous; who is this Achaian man of power and stature? Though in truth there are others taller by a head than he is, yet these eyes have never yet looked on a man so splendid nor so lordly as this: such a man might well be royal.” helen later calls him a 'strong spearfighter'

STANLEY LOMBARDO

Now tell me, who is that enormous man Towering over the Greek troops, handsome, Well-built? I've never laid eyes on such A fine figure of a man. He looks like a king. helen later calls him a 'strong warrior'

STEPHEN MITCHELL

“Tell me now, what is the name of that splendid man who is standing down there, so powerful and so tall. To be sure, there are other men who are even taller, but never before have I seen a man so majestic, so splendid in form and bearing. He must be a king.” helen later calls him a 'mighty soldier'

again. in all of these - nothing. all that's consistent is that he's not the tallest man at troy. which means ..... very little ASDFGHJK. there is Nothing concrete here. nothing that points us more one way than it does the other.

ultimately, dude, what we've got is.... nothing. nothing concrete. nothing definitive. i can't say you're wrong and you can't say i'm wrong.

i saw the phrase 'wine sack' and interpreted it my way and you saw it and interpreted it differently. but books 2 and 3 certainly don't back either of us up more definitively.

and in regards to his age. same thing. you can't say i'm wrong and i can't say you're wrong. but i've explained my reasonings for aga's age using sources HERE

idk man. if you're looking for an EXPLICITLY YOUNG CHISELED ABS LEGEND MALE CHARACTER. look elsewhere.

[crestoflames]

What do you think of MC x Wayne? The devs' most favorable pairing above all the characters, in spite of Stella being the #1 popular Li. Isn't he supposed to be our otp for the main player? I know that you don't seem very fond of Wayne lately because of how he feels and treats your main Li, especially how he is going to feel about that character's unfortunate outcome in one of the bad endings involving a character's death? Also, who will you romance if you are not together with Reese? Oscar or Stella, perhaps?

gotta be honest, this feels like bait.

first off - i’m so confused by a lot of this. i don’t think the devs ever said mc x wayne was their favorite pairing, or that it was supposed to be an otp for the player character??? the way the game works is that there is no “otp” for the player character - you can choose to romance whoever you want, or no one at all; it’s all dependent on your individual playthrough.

second - i don’t really think ive said that the reason i dislike wayne is because of how he treats reese. i mean, that definitely doesn’t help, but my main beef with him is how he treats the MC. he acts like you’re an idiot who can’t make decisions for yourself (but only if you make decisions he doesn’t agree with - very controlling) and denies the MC autonomy by refusing to listen when they tell him to stop doing things, like following them around or threatening to hurt their friends (which, in the case of reese, he actually goes through with). he’s also just an asshole, and i don’t enjoy the way he talks about a lot of people and creatures.

in general, his behavior and personality remind me of creepy asshole guys i’ve had to deal with in my past, and it kind of baffles me when people try and paint him as a good guy. he’s not meant to be a good guy. i think a lot of people know that and that’s why they’re drawn to him (and i get it bc i have plenty of villains i love lol), but I’ve seen just as many people who act like it would be crazy to want to get away from Wayne and the best course of action is to let him have full control and “protect” you all the time. like, if you want that for your playthrough, that’s great, go for it. but i take umbrage with the idea that it’s an objective reality that everyone needs to accept.

now, all this is to say that i do think he’s a well written character. i like him as an antagonist and i think the devs did a great job of creating him in a way that elicits real fear. love him as a character, but despise him when i’m actually experiencing the game as MC, and when people act like I’m committing a crime by disliking him and i need to change my opinion. everyone seems to get it when you say you hate sybil, but if you say you don’t like wayne, people act like you’ve confessed to murder.

moving away from that rant, this message is just baffling in general lmao. quickly addressing most everything else - i’m fine with the concept of mc x wayne, everyone can ship what they want, it’s just not for me, and i dont want to be told that it is the “canon route/best route” and everyone should love it and choose it or whatever. ive never really talked about stella so idk where you got that i would want to romance her??? she’s one of the characters im just not attracted to bc she’s not my type. i will always choose reese in every playthrough bc i feel like im abandoning or betraying him if I don’t, but if I couldn’t choose him, I would choose oscar, followed by kaneeka.

i’m hoping this is enough to end any more questions from you, because if you come back with more bait/troll type messages, I’ll probably just block.

[adrift-in-thyme]

FMAB discussion (continued):

Roy Mustang. I love how his character is borderline villain, yknow? Like how he’s clearly a hero but his ability to follow orders and common sense makes him deadly and vaguely evil. But also he’s the good guy so like. Hdhfbebsjfjdjnajd his character is amazing and unique!! Idk that a see a lot of people like Roy. And the way that he does everything, calculated to a T, and the way he has Riza keep him in check???? Ndjfnend just. Fabulous

And then Riza is amazing, I love how she follows Mustang’s orders but she was never just a soldier, she was sharp and like. That cunningness was something that she never dropped. Like even just standing there, you felt like she was acutely aware of everything. Roy treated her like his equal, and used her status as his subordinate to protect her, to the best of his abilities. He did that with his whole team, and I love how much Roy loves and respected them. Like he really is a great leader, intelligent and compassionate and empathetic.

(Also, on the subject of choosing Legend whump details…how about like, poison? Poison and something to do with difficulty breathing/ coughing up blood/broken ribs. Is that okay? Is that too many? Feel free to change them if you need/want to :3 thank you so much im so hyped :333 <3)

YESSS HE’S SUCH A GOOD CHARACTER. I’m with you. I don’t see many like Roy. He’s built like an antihero and yet he’s…not. He’s committed atrocities yet keeps going to ensure no one ever does such things again. And his cold ambition is used for that purpose and not for his own benefit. At the end of the day he’s…kinda a dreamer. And an optimist??? A calculated optimistic dreamer?? Like how does that even add up?? 😅 He’s very complex and multifaceted and never ceases to surprise me. I love him so much

Oh I LOVE Riza!! Like Roy she honestly just kept surprising me. Her cold calculating, her intelligence and cunning, her skill, but also her kindness and sensitivity. One moment she’s a cold blooded killer and the next she’s giving Ed advice like a cool aunt or something 😅 And her and Roy’s relationship is everything to me.

Roy really is a great leader! That’s another thing about him that kinda baffles me. He seems like he keeps everyone at a distance and yet here’s this team of people who would die for him but he’d never allow them to. He cares deeply for them…so much so that Bradley knows he’ll falter without his little found family

(About the Legend whump…you choosing those tropes makes me so happy you’ve got no idea. I LOVE the poisoning trope. And to get to combine it with other forms of whump? AWESOME. The more pain the better XD So YES absolutely ok! I’ll get started! I’m so excited!!)

[moonjxsung]

haiiii bb✨ i hope you had the best weekend!

i’m still not sure how he managed to do that tbh, i don’t think it’s too easy to achieve😅 so momo is prob safe from that. wasabi is an orange cat, we can’t expect much from him in the braincell department. im glad baby momo is getting better too🫶🏻 we stan her

frfr, idk how people abandon their pets. i’m literally so attached to every animal ever. i see a stray cat at a park and i’ll think of them forever and worry about them too. and people who don’t spay their cats and expect them to be outdoors are such assholes. i’ve had to spay/neuter 10+ cats due to overpopulation in the last two years and i have four more females to go (excluding my own 8 out of 9 cats). it’s insane and so so so sad. the fact that they took off the collar is so stupid too. it really sucks. i cannot comprehend.

star, idk how you do it!!! living where you live in the kpop era must be so hard😭 like, we love the exposure but my bank doesn’t. i sometimes wish i lived somewhere with a lot of kpop concerts but kinda not at the same time bc i just know i couldn’t afford most of them and i’d get the worst case of fomo. i wish you the best at your choice of concerts😂

anddd i didn’t know you stanned nct dream or itzy! follow up: which groups do you stan and who are your biases? i lovveeeee nct! i don’t really stan any ggs aside from twice and new jeans but i’d so love to listen to more so any recs would be gr8!!!

frfr ive never been confident with myself (and ik that’s like my biggest problem bc confidence is so attractive). kpop beauty standards kinda took a toll on me especially after my surgery, grad school, depression worsening etc etc. but ive learned to make delulu my solulu and be like “minho would love me even if im not pretty or skinny” and all is well (what he wouldn’t love about me is that i only eat meat when i absolutely have to bc i hate it😂). i love skincare though so if you ever need to discuss skincare im ur girl🔥 aside from kpop, plushies & cats my ocd also manifests at compulsively buying hundreds of dollars of skincare products🔥

i love you my darling bb. i hope you have the best week!! i’ve never had cheese danishes therefore im so glad i virtually tried them with you💕

-🐈‍⬛

HIIIIIIIII BBYYYY I HOPE YOU HAD THE BEST MONDAY 🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶🫶

Momo is doing so much better today (she’s currently napping on my freshly washed laundry❤️) so I think it might’ve been a weather thing! Hopefully her itching doesn’t come back but I’m still gonna look into bee pollen and see if it helps :’)

I KNOW I feel so very overprotective of every cat ive ever come across and it baffles me that people are just okay with abandoning their cats like that?? Especially after YEARS of owning them!??? How 😭 I don’t even like leaving momo alone for the day (despite her having an automatic feeder and a water fountain and cameras to watch her every move) so I don’t know how people abandon a cat indefinitely 💔 it’s fr so sad to me

HONESTLY it was so much easier to save money when there weren’t so many kpop things here but now we have kpop stores at every corner with v exclusive merch and preorder benefits and concerts every MONTH I can’t save money for the life of me 😭 I SWEARRRRR I buy some useless kpop thing at least once a week it’s so bad! I’m on a buying ban right now bc I just bought jhope’s on the street merch and that is ALLLL I am letting myself buy for the foreseeable future 🫡 hopefully

I LOOOOOOVE NCT OH MY GOSHHHHH okay list of my groups & biases (I might miss a few so bear w me):

Skz: JISUNGGGGG & Felix is my bias wrecker 🫶💖

Bts: jhope!!!!!!!!! Jin is my bias wrecker!

Nct 127: Yuta & Haechan! Wreckers always change but right now probs Taeyong (enlistment era starts today😔)

Nct Dream: I literally just started getting more serious about being into them despite listening to their music for a while LOL but deffffff Renjun & Haechan! 🫶

Wayv: Xiaojun!!!!

Shinee: Onew ofcccc 👼 and Taemin is my wrecker (he’s everybody’s wrecker tbh)

Ateez: Hongjoong & Seonghwa/Yeosang wreckers!

Seventeen: Hoshi & Minghao!!

Txt: Heuningkai 🫶

G-idle: Minnie! I need to get more into them but she’s defffff my bias oh my god she’s so pretty

P1harmony: I’ve also recently been more into them. Jiung!!

The Boyz: Changmin!

Ikon: Bobby!

Blackpink: MY GIRL ROSÉ 💞

Nmixx: Jiwoo & Lily!!!

Itzy: RYUJIN.

EXO: Minseok!!!!

Twice: Dahyun!

Blitzers: Chris!!

Aespa: Winter!

I also listen to Lsrfm and New Jeans but I don’t have biases (I’m more just a casual listener) but I think that’s everyone!! I LOOOOOOVE NCT THOUGH RAHHHHHHH when I tell you I have been crying alllllll day bc of Taeyong enlistment FUCKKKK IM SO SAD 😭😭😭 did you see Mark and Haechan tried to go to his send off and missed it because their flight was rerouted?? GODDDD I’m so sad for them 😭 I brought my Ty bby to today’s coffee run I miss him already 😔💔

PLEASE kpop beauty standards hit you in the face when you least expect it frfr like I always told myself I didn’t care how I looked in comparison and all of a sudden it was like oh nvmmmm 😀 It comes and goes in waves as of now and lately I’ve been trying to work more on just liking myself as a person (and being delulu because that’s the solution to everything) and I also find that’s the best way to combat it 🫶 ALSO SKINCARE YESSSSS I will absolutely bug you for skincare recs I have the worst habit of buying skincare just for the cute packaging LMFAOOOO I need to buckle down and buy actual cute stuff 😭

I love you so much bby have the best week!!!!! Here’s today’s pc I took just for you 🫶👼 I love u!!!!!

[bnnuy-wabbit]

Cunospig -> bnnuywabbit

Name's Lago. I'm 22.

My art tag is #feral art tag

I'm prone to note spamming mutuals! I personally love being note spammed. It's a love language. To me.

If you happened to stumble upon this blog, you Must Know that I'm obsessed with many things, such as FNAF and my own OCs as of writing this post!

I'm Brazilian. As in from Brazil. As in Born There and Living There till my eventual demise, possibly. If you also happen to be one of those or adjacent, feel free to hit me up. É nois 🤙

I treat my blog as an open diary sometimes. There'll be cool things about my life and things in excited about and things that make me upset and general life shit. I also talk a lot about my little brothers endeavors because i love him and he's my little creature. If this bothers you, i recommend not following. Also this blog contains adult stuff because im an adult, follow at your own risk and/or pleasure 👍

More info under readmore!! But only if you feel like it.

Other than the aforementioned, i have Many other interests that Can and WILL show up here, like:

My OCs and worldbuilding

Portal

Half life and hlvrai

Disco Elysium

Stranger Things

Homestuck

Whump stuff

FNAF

Literally whatever show and game im currently watching or playing.

I'm also VERY into music. My favorite genres are 00s pop, industrial metal, heavy metal, classic rock, folk and mpb. I love learning more about music and getting to know new music genres. Feel free to pop some in my inbox.

Random info: I use emojis abd smileys unironically. I just love to pepper my texts with some emotion here and there. I promise there's no sarcasm associated to my emojis and smileys. If i send i smiling smiley i Mean It. I also add !!!! To them if I'm particularly excited. Tone tags are confusing to me, I don't use them.

Regarding The Me: I'm queer and weird about it! My gender is completely not my business, it's up to you to gender me haha also I'm an Artist and creator at heart, so i draw a lot, i like sculpting things with clay and foam, i love doing collages, i like playing my guitar and sometimes i write fucked up things for fun because it's Fun, tho i wouldn't call myself a writer. I'm diagnosed audhd. I'm weird and not in a cutesy way sometimes, but at least I'm funny about it i think!

I'm a year one med student with a background in AG/rural sciences (vetmed + fishing) which ig is kinda funny. The funniest thing about me is I'm an honest to god fishing technician. I have a fucking diploma in fishing. I have no idea how or why, it still baffles me!! I have plenty thoughts on the ag/fishing field as a whole and a bit of experience with Some Things. I've worked in a few labs and written and published a few papers and I've wanted to be a Real Scientist when i grew up since i was a kid :)

I'm REALLY shy, but please feel free to send an ask asking for my discord if you'd like to chat. My messages are off for nonmutuals because I grew tired of getting spambots. One thing i MUST state upfront if you'd like to talk to me and be friends: i likely have a personality disorder (avpd, extreme anxiety regarding Connecting to People) but I'm working on it! I'm trying to get better at talking about myself and my interests and socializing, so don't blame yourself if our conversations fall flat. Talking and initiating conversations with people is Hard, but I'm alright at keeping conversations going if you tell me about your likes and dislikes or if you wanna do small talk! My cheat sheet is: Talk to me about your favorite weather, your timezone, what you like learning more about, about your country and culture or your favorite types of music and your favorite bands! Tell me about yourself, please!!! I'm told i can be really cool to talk to if we get to know each other, I'm told I'm a very trusting, agreeable and judgementless individual. I'm eager to make new friends and learn more about people and we'll bond over something, I'm sure 🥰.

I think that's about it.

Updated: 15.may.24