#International Noise Awareness Day

[thelofian]

Dynamic Daily Booster Table (TTCC DBT) for 2024-04-25, Tactical Thursday, 🦟🔬 World Malaria Day | 💰🔑 International Financial Independence Awareness Day | 🔇 International Noise Awareness Day | 🐧 World Penguin Day | 📞 National Telephone Day

[florencemtrash]

Take it Off - Azriel x Reader

Summary: You and Azriel have been friends for centuries... but what happens when he wakes up one day to find that things have changed? And how will he react when you start wearing Cassian's clothes?

Warnings: Angst. Jealous Azriel. Suggestiveness and then some (I don't know what warning to put, but it's spicier than my usual stuff is all I'll say). Cassian is an absolute menace... good for him

Author's note: Did I write this to procrastinate editing SSIB Ch 22 after watching Bridgerton S3?... yes

Is this a fucking game to you?

Cassian grinned over the lip of his cup, raising his brow in a poorly disguised expression of confusion. He’d been playing the innocent fool all throughout breakfast, seemingly oblivious to the daggers Azriel was throwing his direction every time he made you laugh.

Internally, he and Nesta were both cackling. He threw his arm over the back of his meta’s chair, plucking the cream puff she held out for him, and tossing it into his mouth with a shit-eating grin. 

I’ve not the faintest idea what you’re talking about, Azriel. Although it hurts me deeply to see you so upset.

Upset was an understatement. Azriel was holding onto his glass of orange juice so tightly cracks were beginning to form beneath his fingertips. 

You elbowed Azriel in the ribs, brows furrowed as you pointed your slice of toast towards his hand. “Are you ok?” You whispered low and just for his ears. 

The molten anger in his eyes melted away, hazel eyes softening as he took in your concerned expression. You were the first and only one of his family members to watch him so intensely. You could unravel the meaning in every twitch of his jaw, every rhythmic tap of his fingers against his thigh, every flicker of his shadows. You knew when he was upset, when he was happy, and when he wanted to laugh but had trouble expressing it. The only thing you weren’t aware of when it came to Azriel was how unbelievably in love with you he was. 

But that was his own fault. 

You’d watched him fawn over Mor for centuries, watched as he practically crawled on hand and knees for any kernel of affection she was willing to throw his way. Then, when you thought he’d finally gotten over his feelings for her, he’d chased after Elain’s heels like a dog in heat. You didn’t even want to begin thinking about Gwyn and the way she’d trampled over his hopes with the simple phrase, “I love you as a friend, Azriel. Nothing more.” 

No. It was entirely his fault that you’d learned to bury your own feelings for him so deep they’d become background noise — as inconsequential and ever present as the sound of your own breathing. 

Still… you couldn’t help but notice the secrets swimming in his eyes, the hurt and longing there that you could only guess the origin of. Who’d hurt him this time? You wondered. 

“I’m fine.” Azriel whispered, his hands ghosting over your thighs before deciding against touching you there. 

You hummed, clearly unconvinced. You held your toast in between your teeth, tasting the raspberry jam explode on your tongue as you reached over and carefully peeled Azriel’s fingers off his injured glass. 

His heart stuttered at the sight of your lips as they closed around your thumb, licking away crumbs and jam from your fingertips. But then his gaze dropped to your chest and his stomach soured. 

As Madja’s apprentice, you’d acquired a special interest in botany — an interest that had all but shoved you into Feyre’s studio so you could learn the skills necessary to depict all manner of flora and fauna in your field journal. When you’d complained about finding paint and charcoal stains over your clothes, Cassian had jumped on the opportunity to give you his old shirts to use as painting smocks. He had to congratulate himself for the stroke of genius. After all, he and Nesta had been discussing plans on how to get Azriel to admit his feelings for months now. 

Azriel did not respond well to outright suggestions or bullying. If he told Azriel to pull his head out of his ass and ask you on a proper date, the Shadowsinger would only hunker down on his preconceptions that he was unloveable, and that you were far too good for him. If he revealed to Azriel that you’d secretly loved him for decades that would only make him feel even more embarrassment and shame. 

No.

  Jealousy worked far better when it came to Azriel.

You looked comfortable and happy in Cassian’s clothes — a fact that escaped no one’s notice. You had the sleeves rolled up past your elbows, the rows of buttons at your back haphazardly done without wings to accommodate. You’d worn that particular shirt a half dozen times now and replaced any scent of Cassian with your own. 

Still, you were wearing another male’s shirt… and it was starting to drive Azriel insane.

“I was going to get rid of these and thought you might like them for… painting.” Azriel shifted on his feet, holding out the neatly stacked pile of clothes for you. 

You were laying on your stomach in bed, colored pencils and textbooks splayed out around you, but quickly righted yourself and sifted through the piles he handed you.

You held one up for a better look. 

“Azriel, you were just wearing this last week.” It still smelled like him — the scent of the Illyrian mountains at night woven through the soft, cotton material. “I can’t take this. Or this. Or this!” 

“I have more just like them.” 

You huffed, fists balanced on your hips. 

Azriel was a simple male with ample space in his wardrobe. When he wasn’t in his Illyrian leathers he wore the same three outfits on rotation, all of them nearly identical. If there was anyone who shouldn’t be giving away clothes, it was Azriel. 

“I really appreciate it, Az, but I’m ok. I don’t need these. Cassian already gave me enough hand-me-downs to last two decades at least.” 

A muscle in Azriel’s jaw jumped out. “Well I’m glad for that.” He was practically seething. You noticed, as you always did, but you couldn’t imagine that you were the cause of his frustrations. 

“Are you sure you’re alright, Az? You’ve been acting strangely the past few days.” 

“It’s nothing.”

“I doubt that.” 

There were various things on his mind, chief among them you. So he took hold of the olive branch you’d extended him and laid down beside you, talking about everything and nothing at all. But one thing he avoided talking about at all costs was how the gentle scraping of your nails through his hair as he rested his head in your lap made him want to lock the door and never come out. 

He wanted to bury his face beneath your sundress and then tear it to pieces. He wanted to dive under the covers and leave an assortment of marks on your skin. To hold you so close that you began to smell like one another. 

You lay down beside him, leaning your head against his shoulder so he caught whiffs of your elderberry and lemon shampoo. 

“You know you can tell me anything, right? That’s what friends are for.” 

Right… friends. He was starting to hate that word. 

“Yes… I know.” 

How long do you think he’ll last?

Nesta felt Cassian’s soft laugh blow over the back of her neck as they crouched just behind the door of Feyre's painting studio.

Azriel had been undeniably irritable the last two weeks, his patience fraying like a linen skirt with the hem torn off. Cassian was still sporting a bruise on his cheek from this morning’s sparring session after one of his teasing remarks had hit a little too close to home. 

Not much longer. Look at him, Nes. He’s practically vibrating.

Nesta slapped her hand over her mouth, stifling her laughter. 

Azriel was restless, his wings kept opening and closing with agitation and the curve of his ears had long since turned a bright shade of pink. He’d had his shadows knock over a cup of ink earlier, sending its contents splattering over your shirt and staining the fabric beyond repair. But you’d only shrugged and said, “It’s my painting shirt. It’s meant to get dirty,” before going back to your canvas with a soft smile. The moment you’d turned your back to him, he’d silently cursed the ceiling. 

Stupid, stupid, stupid. He kicked himself, too focused on your continuing conversation to think that his meddling brother and sister-in-law might be watching. 

He hadn’t expected his emotions to take over so quickly, least of all with you. You’d been his best friend for over two hundred years. You were a staple in his life, more familiar to him than the childhood blanket he still had tucked away in his drawer. There was no reason why he should suddenly wake up one day and realize with a shock of surprise that he loved you and couldn’t imagine living in a world that didn’t have you in it. 

It had been such a silly moment as well. You’d been getting ready for Starfall, your hair done up and a flush of color spread over your cheeks and lips. He’d come to check in on you and lost his breath when he saw you sitting at the vanity, holding up earrings to your neck to see if they matched the satin of your deep blue gown. And then you’d politely asked him to lace up your dress and he’d nearly swallowed his tongue in surprise, forcing his hands to stop shaking as they brushed against your spine. Gods he’d wanted to throw himself off a balcony that night, if only because you’d be the one tasked with healing him. 

He wanted to throw himself off the balcony now. Let the ground swallow him whole so he wouldn’t have to make a fool of himself in front of you… again. 

I give it another week. Nesta declared.

Cassian smirked. I know my brother. He won’t last another three days.

In the end they were both wrong. 

It only took two days for Azriel to finally snap.

“Take it off.” 

You swiveled around in your chair, tongue pressing against your cheek as you wondered what gave Azriel the audacity to march into your private lesson with Feyre and make such an out-of-character demand. 

“What?” You asked, furrowing your brows. 

Azriel stood as still as an obsidian statue in the doorway. His wings loomed over his shoulders, talons reaching towards the ceiling tense and twitching. 

“Take. It. Off,” he repeated through gritted teeth. He clutched a neatly folded shirt in his hands, knuckles pale and bloodless from the tight grip. You’d been wearing Cassian’s clothes almost every day this past week and he couldn’t stand it anymore. He couldn’t stand sitting beside you at the dinner table or in the library, the laughter in his throat dying when he caught Cassian’s scent drifting off your skin. 

It was maddening the way you didn’t think anything of it. 

Yes, Cassian was practically a brother to you, and yes, he was a mated male but… fuck it bothered Azriel so much to think of anyone else laying claim to you. To think that one day you might actually walk around wearing another male’s clothes because you loved them. To think that that male wouldn’t be him. 

He’d tried to bring up the topic with you in his own round-about way, but you’d shrugged off all his suggestions of wearing something — anything — else. 

“If you want painting clothes, why don’t we go shopping this afternoon? I’m sure Feyre has recommendations. Or we could just walk around the Rainbow until something catches your eye.” 

“I’m not a full time artist, and it seems silly to spend money on clothes you intend to ruin.” 

“Why don’t you ask Feyre or Mor for hand-me-downs then? They’ll fit you better and the sleeves won’t drag so much.” 

“I like it when my clothes are loose.” 

Feyre glanced between the two of you, namely the flare of Azriel’s nostrils and the way he ground his teeth so intently you worried he’d crack a tooth. 

“I’m… going to leave now.”

“Wait—Feyre!” 

The High Lady kissed your cheek, a knowing look in her eyes, before scurrying out the door. 

Don’t scowl so much, Az, you’re making her nervous. She chirped to the Shadowsinger before slipping down the hallway and disappearing. 

She made it all of ten feet down the hall before crowing, “It’s happening!” to the others. 

It’s happening?! Mor leapt out from her bedroom, a robe hastily tied around her waist and soap suds clinging to her hair. “Fey—” she hissed.

Feyre pressed a finger up to her lips, cutting her off. They’re in the art studio now. 

I fucking KNEW IT! Mor squealed in delight, stomping her feet soundlessly into the floorboards as she allowed Feyre to grab her wrist and drag her forward. 

I won the bet, Nes.

You didn’t win, we both lost!

Semantics. 

Why you bas—

Feyre, Rhys, Mor, Cassian, and Nesta streamed into the foyer. There was an air vent here that led directly to the art studio two floors above them and painted over so expertly it may as well have been part of the molding. The sounds traveling through it were muffled by echos and distance, but nothing that fae hearing and magic couldn’t overcome. 

“That’s it!” The chair you’d been sitting in skittered back with a squeak. “What is your problem, Azriel? You’ve been agitated for weeks now. You won’t tell me, or any of the others, what’s wrong and every time Cassian so much as glances in your direction you look like you want to tear his throat out!” 

Azriel said nothing as you stomped forward and dragged him into the room, slamming the door shut behind him. Whiskey eyes flickered down to your hand — the hand you currently had closed around his wrist — and he shuddered. 

You didn’t even want to begin to unpack the hidden meaning of that response as you brought him to the center of the room and let go. 

He dropped the shirt on the nearby desk, hands lowering to the hem of your painting smock with a grimace. 

“I need you to take this off.” He repeated with a frown.

“What kind of person marches into a room and demands that their friend take off their shirt?” 

He flinched at that word — friend.

“Az!” Your voice snapped him out of his thoughts, and his anger. “What is going on with you?!” 

“It’s nothing.” He growled out, but he tugged at the hem like its very existence was a personal offense.

“Clearly it’s not nothing.”

“Can you just take off your shirt and put this one on?”

You shoved him away. It wasn’t even like he was asking you to get naked, you both knew you were wearing something beneath this, but it was the way he was asking that grated on your nerves — like what he was requesting was perfectly normal and you were the ridiculous one for not listening.

“No.” You folded your arms over your chest with a huff. You were just being stubborn now, but you didn’t care. 

His eyes turned tortured and he clasped his hands together in front of you. “Please?” He begged.

“No! Not until you tell me what’s going on and why you’re acting this way!” 

“I don’t want to have this discussion while you’re standing there smelling like another male!”

That was… not what you were expecting.

You gaped at him, unsure whether to howl with laughter, or slap him across the face. 

“That’s what this is about? You’re upset because I’m wearing Cassian’s clothes?” You gagged at the mere thought of what Azriel was insinuating. 

“Well that was a little hurtful.” Cassian mumbled. 

Mor slapped the back of his head. “Shhhhh. I’m trying to listen.”

Azriel shifted on his feet, color beginning to spread high on his cheekbones. “It’s not about Cassian… not really…”

You tapped your foot on the ground, waiting for him to continue. Azriel felt naked. Stripped back like one of your insect specimens lit up beneath a microscope. Your eyes raked over his every movement. Even his shadows, usually so attention-seeking, cowered behind their master’s back whispering to one another about how Azriel might dig himself out of his own grave. 

“Well?” You snapped. 

Azriel shrank back, “I… I like you, Y/n.” 

You rolled your eyes, “I know, that’s why we’re friends. I like you too.”

“No. Not… not like that.” Azriel groaned, burying his face in his hands. “Oh I’m fucking this up so badly it’s not even funny anymore.” 

“I don’t even know what it is you’re fucking up. I—”

“I love you, ok?” He said in a burst of energy.  “I love you and not in the way that friends are meant to love one another and Cassian’s an idiot and I’m a jealous bastard and I… I…” 

You stared back dumbly. “You can’t mean that.” 

Azriel’s face fell. “And why not?”

“Because I have been here for decades, centuries,” you jabbed his chest with a finger, “And you never once looked at me that way. Never once considered me as anything more than a friend. You’re upset because I’ve been wearing Cassian’s clothes the last few weeks? Well guess what, Az, I’ve watched you walk in and out of those doors for years with your poorly concealed hickies and that lovesick look on your face, and I never made it your problem or anyone else’s.” 

“Well I want you to!” He shouted. It was the first and only time you could remember him raising his voice. “I want you to make it my problem, Y/n. I want you to tell me that you love me and I want you to shout at me for all the stupid decisions I’ve made because I’m yours. I’m yours to shout at. I’m yours to get angry with. I’m yours to love if you’ll still have me and…” Azriel gasped for breath, chest heaving as he came face to face with the fact that he’d just said those words out loud. Those words that he’d kept close to his chest with the rest of his secrets. Those words that proved just how completely at your mercy he was. 

Please say you’ll still have me. His eyes begged. 

When you didn’t move or say anything, he felt a piece of his heart wither away. He lowered his eyes, suddenly interested in a speckle of red paint that had smeared under his boot, “Forgive me. I’m… I’m sorry I didn’t… I shouldn’t have—” 

“You’re a fucking idiot, Azriel.” You muttered breathlessly. 

Then you flung yourself into his arms and crashed your lips into his. 

Kissing Azriel was better than you could have ever imagined. The fantasies you’d constructed late in the night when you were lonely blew apart like paper houses, crumbling in the face of reality. His mouth fumbled for purchase against your lips before slotting into place with a strangled moan. He lifted you in the air and you instinctively wrapped your legs around his waist, tightening them until you could feel him harden between your legs. 

His tongue flitted over your lips tasting like oranges and magic. 

But his hands. 

His hands. 

You couldn’t get enough of them as they slid up and down your back, squeezing and pressing into your skin until he’d memorized the curve of your spine. You wove your fingers in his hair, tilting his head so you could stare into his hazel eyes before diving in for another taste. 

He walked you back to the desk, shadows flinging the tins of charcoal and pastel pencils off the furniture so you could perch there instead. Then he surged forward, pressing his hips into the space between your legs so he could feel the heat that gathered there. It sent shivers down his spine.

This… this was everything he’d ever wanted. You were everything he’d ever wanted. Not some unapproachable female he admired from afar but hardly knew, but someone who’d seen every inch of his soul and never flinched. Someone who’d nestled into the hidden corners of his heart and grown there like a willow tree. 

You moved your hands over the wide expanse of his back, digging your nails in to feel every twitch of muscle, every shudder, as he latched onto the side of your neck and slid his tongue over the sensitive skin there. 

He smelled like mountain rain. Like fresh wind and petrichor and sea salt. 

You smelled like lemons and safety. Like maple leaves and lavender and… Cassian.

Because you were still wearing his gods-damned shirt. 

Azriel felt his blood boil, and an instinctual rage took over as he growled low in his throat, bunched the fabric of Cassian’s shirt in his hands, and tore it in two.

You pulled away from him at the sound of ripping fabric, but kept your grip on his solid shoulders as air blew across your skin.

Azriel’s pupils were blown wide, his lips pink and raw as he leaned his forehead against yours in a daze. You continued to breathe each other’s air like you were drowning. He seemed just as in disbelief as you, if not more. 

“Azriel…” You whispered, chest heaving. 

He looked at you with half-lidded eyes full of heat. “... yes, Y/n?” He asked breathlessly.

“I think you ripped through my dress… and my bra as well…” 

“Oh…” He fingered the ruined fabric that fell loose around your shoulders and realized that your back was indeed on full display. The straps of your bra slipped down and the mangled buttons of your sundress clung to their loops by weak threads. “Oh…oh gods.” 

One hand flew up to your chest to keep the fabric in place while the other slapped over your mouth, suffocating the laughter that threatened to burst forth. 

Azriel’s ears and cheeks turned brighter than the sun as he slowly lowered you down to your feet, fumbling over apologies like he hadn’t been shoving his tongue down your throat mere seconds ago. 

“I’m so sorry—” 

“Azriel, it’s ok.” 

“No, I was being an ass and now I’ve ruined your dress and—” 

“You can buy me more.”

Azriel’s shoulder dropped. “I can?” “You can.” 

He shook his head very seriously. “Yes, yes you’re right, I—” Azriel had always been the beautiful one — the one that drew eyes when he walked into a room. The one that had females and males falling out of their seats for a proper look at his elegant features. But right now he looked so helpless, so flustered and unsure of himself that you finally lost it. 

Champagne bubble laughs slipped out of your mouth, light and airy, and sent a shock of warmth through Azriel’s chest. It was infectious the way the skin stretched over your cheeks. The light in your eyes couldn’t be contained no matter how hard you tried. 

He couldn’t help himself. 

He started laughing too. 

What began as one of his reserved chuckles grew into uncontrollable peals of laughter that echoed throughout the studio and had you clutching onto the desk for support. 

Azriel doubled over, one hand holding the stitch in his side together as you howled. 

“Oh gods. I can’t—” You hiccuped. “I-I-I can’t breathe.” 

Soon you were both kneeling on the ground, clutching each other’s arms for some semblance of stability. You gasped for breath, wiping away tears from the corners of your eyes. 

Azriel captured one of your hands, weaving his fingers through yours before bringing your wrist to his lips for a soft, reverent kiss. You thought you’d experienced enough emotions for today ranging from frustration to anger to a joy you couldn’t begin to put into words. But you were certain your heart could handle one more shift in the atmosphere. 

Wordlessly you tugged off Cassian’s shirt, dropping it to the side where shadows caught hold of the cursed fabric and quickly tossed it into the fireplace. The flames crackled with triumph, eating away at the shirt with a vengeance. 

“A little dramatic, don’t you think?” 

“We can agree to disagree.” Azriel murmured, his eyes growing dark and heavy. His gaze drifted down to the soft skin now exposed from your tattered dress, the thin straps clinging to your arms, the gentle swell of your breasts as you breathed heavily. 

His fingers danced over the straps in silent permission, eyes searching yours for any hint of hesitation. But you were open and wanting and desperate for his touch. You crawled into his lap and a faint nod was all he needed before the pale blue fabric of your dress fell down and bunched about your waist. The bra followed, and then you were sitting there naked from the waist up, feeling the heat grow between your bodies as Azriel looked at you with pure adoration in his eyes. 

“Am I dreaming, Y/n?” He whispered, rubbing circles into your hip bones. 

You smiled softly, “Have you dreamed of me before?”

“Yes. Many times.” He kissed your chest, slowly dragging his hands down your ribs as you shivered and fumbled with the buttons of his shirt, and then his belt buckle. “But we never got this far.” 

“Hmmmm, I think we could go a little further.” 

“NOT IN MY STUDIO!” Feyre’s voice echoed oddly through the room, sounding muffled and far away. 

Azriel’s wings flared out, hiding you from view as you yelped and pressed your chest against his. Your cheeks burned with embarrassment about being found in such a compromising position. But the door was closed! And so were the windows!

His shadows finally found the culprit in the air vent.

“Godsdamnit—HAVE YOU BEEN LISTENING THE ENTIRE TIME?!” Azriel shouted. 

A moment passed before Feyre answered, “... No,” in a much softer tone. 

“We missed part of the beginning,” Cassian chimed in. 

Azriel groaned, dropping his forehead against your shoulder as you were stunned into silence. He muttered something beneath his breath that sounded oddly similar to, “I swear I’m going to kill him one day.”

Azriel helped you to your feet and finally, you put on his shirt. 

“Are you happy now?” You teased, arms dropping to your sides. 

The corner of his lip twitched upwards. You looked… very good in his clothes with the sleeves rolled up and a sliver of your dress (now skirt) peeking out from beneath. 

He looked towards the vent, then wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you close so he could whisper, “I would be happier if I saw my shirt and that dress of yours on the floor of my bedroom.” 

His hand slid up your skirt, squeezing the back of your thighs in a way that had you stiffening. 

All at once he was second-guessing himself. Maybe he’d taken things too far. Maybe the lust-filled haze had cleared and you didn’t want him anymore. 

You swallowed and wrapped your hand around his wrist, gently guiding his fingers to your core. You let him know just how much you wanted this. 

A roar of blood sounded in the Shadowsinger’s ears. 

“I think that sounds like a very good plan.” You murmured in agreement and his eyes turned black as night.

He stole another long kiss before scooping you into his arms. 

“Az, where are we going?” You giggled into the curve of his throat as he flew down the hallway and stairs. “We just passed your bedroom.” 

“We’re not going to my bedroom.”

“Well we missed my bedroom too.” 

He didn’t respond.

Azriel skidded to a stop at the top of the staircase, already well aware that his family had gathered at the bottom and were waiting to bombard him with questions. 

Azriel smirked at you, leaned down, and kissed your cheek. “When I take you to bed properly, it won’t be with our nosey family members in the house.” He ran his tongue across the line of your jaw all the way to your earlobe and whispered, “I want any noises you make to be for me, and me alone.” 

“You are certainly a man of poetry, Az.”

He smiled. “Only for you.” 

“Well, well, well if it isn’t the two love—” Shadows flew into his mouth, muffling his words. “HEH! Azz! Whazthf—”

“I’ll see you in a week.” He said to no one in particular, his shadows opening the door of the River House. 

“Where are you going?” Mor asked, her eyes zeroing in on the bright red mark blossoming on your neck. What the fuck? She mouthed at you, giving you two thumbs up as Azriel crossed the doorway with you in his arms.

“None of your business. I’ll see you in a week.” Then he looked down at you, eyes growing soft. “We’ll see you in a week,” he corrected himself. 

Your stomach bottomed out, heat flowing through your body as you heard him make such a declaration in front of... well everyone. You couldn't wait to see where he would take you and where he would take you.

"Ready?" Azriel asked, a sultry smile growing on his face.

"Ready."

You wrapped your arms around his neck, burying your face in the hollow of his throat as he took off into the air. 

[samkerrworshipper]

the lawn is dead

it’s suicide awareness month and i want to emphasise the importance of reaching out. you are loved. there are options. you will be missed. suicide is a permanent solution to temporary problems. you can get better. you are not a lost cause. talk to somebody.

warnings: reader discretion advised. heavy suicide, self harm, depression themes

There was an overall assumption that all children were born innocent.

Not you.

You swore that when you were born, a coin was flipped, and it landed on the complete wrong side.

Sometimes you felt like your brain and body were disconnected, that everything inside of you worked separately, like you were a sewed together body on the inside, a internal frankenstein.

It was tough feeling like you didn’t belong in your own boyd, but it was even harder when you knew that you were an imposter inside.

It was ironic, that you had imposter syndrome, and yet there was nothing wrong with your life.

There had been.

Had. No longer. Past tense.

You’re supposed to be happy, you suppose. You have the world at your feet, you have the life everybody wants, the world is your oyster.

It doesn’t matter how many times you rotate those thoughts through your split up brain, it never sinks in, because there is a deeply onset belief inside of you that can’t deny the dishonesty behind the words.

You should be happy, you should be utilising the gifts you’ve been given, you should be appreciating the life you have, and yet all of it just feels like a big ball of tangled up yarn, a clump of knots and mess that makes no sense.

You’re not allowed to feel numb, so you try and pinpoint what it is that you are feeling.

Are is too hard, so you start with aren’t.

You aren’t mad, you aren’t sad or it doesn’t feel like normal sadness, you’re definitely not happy, not scared, are not anxious, it feels like nothingness.

Yet nothingness doesn’t feel so all consuming, nothingness is lying in bed down in bed and doomscrolling until somehow 8 hours have passed and you’ve wasted a whole day and don’t find yourself caring. Nothingness is sitting down in the shower and covering your ears with your hands and finding solace in the intense rain noises. Nothingness is driving until you forget where you were supposed to be going and have autopiloted your way to the opposite side of town somehow. Nothingness is being so obsolete of your own body that everything is a fog, nothing makes sense, you’re devoid of all emotions and all the discombobulated sections of your body.

If anything, this is everythingness, this is all the feelings in the world beating down across your skin. You’re itching with agitation, itching with everything in your life and yet none of it penetrates the surface beyond the rotor of thoughts that continue to circulate like the blood in your veins.

It’s like your sitting inside a plastic bubble, and every variable is crashing down against the plastic. It’s all there, it’s crashing down, but it doesn’t touch you, it doesn’t penetrate, there is just a constant reminder that it’s all there. If you try to break out of the bubble you’re forced to face it, but you feel like you’re suffocating and the bubble is slowly depriving you of oxygen.

A part of you wouldn’t mind for it to suck the life out of you.

Sometimes it’s inevitable, letting the thoughts in your brain win, or syncing the truth out so much that it all distorts into a messy mixture of non-emotions that are more hurtful then helpful.

You’re in a weird funk, that’s hwat you keep telling yourself. With injuries and off-season and change of seasons. You tell yourself that it’s unescapable, that there aren’t any ways to escape the deadly habit that is you’re self-inflicted brain rotting and slowly decomposing.

There are outlets, there are options, but in it;s current state you’re brain denounces them all.

Occasionally, you’re brain falls into the same death trap that it was conditioned into as a child. Survival was solely your own responsisbility, there was no leaning, no relying, just yourself and your own strategies that occasionally kept you functioning.

Most of the time you were fine, most of the time you were able to isolate the darkest, disconnected fragments of your body but not all the time.

Sometimes you don’t though.

Every so often, you suffocate yourself, intentionally or unintentionally isn’t always clear, sometimes you’re so lacking on oxygen and everything that makes survival a possibility that you just stop. Those times, when you stop, when you fall, when you plummet. It’s when you drop into the death pit of unthinkable thoughts.

It’s when you get to the part of your brain that you wish had never been stitched up with all the others.

You try and avoid it, if you work hard on a normal day then you can normally disconnect it from the functioning parts that you rely on, but occasionally, when you’re left to fend for yourself that one part that’s normally off, lights up like a christmas tree.

It flashes bright red, like a alarm in the deepest parts of your brain, and it won’t stop flashing until you do something about it.

You’ve got coping mechanisms that you’ve developed over the years, running, football, eating, cooking, reading, sleeping, sex. None of it has even begun to strike the surface, normally your best bet was sleeping it off, depression, or depressive thoughts always seemed to fade with sunlight, it was the moments in the dark when everything suddenly felt… heavier.

You hadn’t been able to sleep since you’d gotten injured, everything was harder when you had so much weight on your back. Weight to recover, weight to get stronger, weight to be the same on the pitch.

It was a minor injury, some grief with your ankle ligaments that weren’t actually injured but also weren’t fixed, it was annoying, and everyday was a drag.

A drag of back and forth recovery and rest that had your mind buzzing from the inside.

It was no secret that you didn’t handle injuries well, you craved the physicality of being a professional athlete, your brain needed the stimulation that it involved. Without it, you struggled, it was clear to everybody around you that you couldn’t function sitting on the sidelines, it had inevitably made you crazy.

You were walking on eggshells, your friends had tried to point it out to you and you’d ignored it up until now.

It was impossible to ignore it at this stage though.

It was all you could think about, the constant pain, the overwhelming brain fuzz, the weight of it all.

Over and over and over and over and over again.

Your hands are shaking, your breaths are staggered, your skin is prickly, your throat is dry, your body is cold and there is a deep set pain in the centre of your stomach that no matter how many times you try and shift it away nothing works.

You’re too deep.

Your whole life, it had always been your biggest wish that the part of you that was broken and threaded together would fix itself, medication made it manageable, therapy made it calmer, but sometimes in life it was impossible to contain the uncontainable. Life was unpredictable, and yet your circumstances were on trend with how your life had been recently.

You should have seen this coming, but a part of you thinks that you did and you’d been content with letting all of these thoughts infiltrate deep in your mind.

Sometimes you look at yourself in the mirror, and you can’t even notice it, it’s like all of the pain and trauma will fall so far from the surface on occasion that you’re foolish enough to believe that maybe it’s all finally gone.

Not now, not at all.

But a part of you wants to make it all gone.

It’s all you can think about, you know how easy it would be, you have it all planned out.

The letters are written, the plan has been made for years, it’s your execution that is lacking.

You aren’t scared, you are more than happy for a big blac cloud of nothingness to come and take you from your life, it would make it all so much easier.

You just need to know that you’ll succeed.

Failure is not an option, in ever single part of your life it hasn’t ever been. But specifically with your life.

If you’re out, you’re out, end of sentence.

There isn’t any recovery, there isn’t any coming back, no psych holds, no hospitals, no treatment, just death. It’s an answer, it’s conclusive. Right now it would solve all of your problems, literally, you could count on every single finger and toe how it would solve the fucked-up puzzle of your life. Normally, there is always something holding you back though. Football had been the main excuse for most times, the headlines would be miserable and all of the fuss and fake-sentiment would be so much worse. Once it had been because you were in love, and that was the best reason. But, like most thing you were unable to keep it alive, and so it died out.

It was all a metaphor for your life, football had been good, until it all slowly self-detonated, love had been good but you were a ticking time bomb of sabotage.

It would be oh so easy.

You knew the tips and tricks, you’d been thinking about it for years. Four long vertical lines, deep enough to need stitches but not deep enough that it would all fade immediately. You wanted to feel the pain, you wanted it all to be a big black and red painful mess, your vision swimming and body giving up because of the pain, not because of the damage you’d done.

It sounded so perfect.

It would be oh so easy, nobody would even notice, it would probably be days before anybody even realised you were gone. You would fade from earth and life like nothing, and nobody would care, and you were happy for it to be that way. You were happy to just disappear, you wanted it all to end.

It’s all hitting that hard, you don’t want help, you don’t want to feel normal, you don’t want treatment, you don’t want meds, you just want to be gone. You normally experience life with so many emotions, too many, but right now, in the bubble of your depression, the only think you feel is a desire to vanish.

There isn’t any hesitation, nothing holding you back as you pick up your poison of choice. It’s always been the same since you were a teenager, you’ve known how you’d go out from the minute it had gone downhill from the very first time. That had been a long time ago now, but not much had changed. Sure, maybe your face had matured a bit, you’re body had changed with being a professional athlete, and you weren’t as self destructive but really when it all boiled down nothing had truly changed.

You were the same broken, lost and alone girl that you had always been.

The same girl hiding in the corner of her bathroom in a pair of sweats that made her body seem so much smaller then it was, a razor blade in one shaky hand and the other hand busy forcing the sleeve of her hoodie up, leaving a easily accessible patch of skin.

It was the same old routine, except this time with a different intention.

You had your scars, you had your invisible marks that nobody could see but you. You were as good at hiding them as you were at your depleting mental health. Over the years you’d learnt how to hurt yourself without leaving permanent marks, you’d learnt how to hide it all from the people closest to you.

Until Alexia.

Love made a person dumb, and being in love with Alexia made you happier then you’d ever experienced and from the moment fireworks had gone off between the two of you, your barriers had fallen down. It had been good, until it hadn’t. Once again, you were left all alone, due to your own self-destructive habits. You couldn’t let yourself be happy, you didn’t know what long term happiness looked like for you and it was terrifying.

It had all been downhill from there, if there was no happiness in the future for you then what was the point? Your life was blowing up, football was the only thing you’d ever lived for and you still had football but football wasn’t for ever, if there was nothing beyond that then what was the point. You didn’t have a education, and whilst you earnt a decent amount off of football, it wasn’t enough to live off of, and now you had nobody else to live for.

Your life, from your perspective, had become pointless.

Whilst you were certain that your behaviour and gone unnoticed, that was far from the truth.

Most of your teammates had picked up on your particularly low mood. You weren’t ever the happiest person in the locker room, one of the more lowkey people who always allowed yourself to fade into the shadows. But that didn’t mean that people didn’t notice you, especially the people who had come to care for you.

You were injured, and that had come to be the main justification for your particularly down moods, but there was also a sneaking suspicion across some of your teammates that something more was wrong, that there was some other kind of cause for the way you dragged yourself around the gym and rooms during your days spent doing rehab.

You looked lifeless, like everything human about you had been drained.

Alexia knew it was something more, in her time with you, she’d learnt about your struggles and just when she thought that you’d started to open up to her, you’d cut it all off. So whilst she didn’t know the extensive history, she knew you had your demons, and that whatever was haunting you this time around wasn’t going to dissapear anytime soon.

Alexia could say that she didn’t care about you anymore, but it would make her a liar.

She’d always hoped that the two of you would make your way back to eachother, that you’re insistence that the two of you weren’t meant to be was overshadowed by the doubt you’d always about the relationship would somehow flip and you’d realise no matter how many issues you had Alexia was prepared to love you through all of them.

But as the time passed from the breakup, you only distanced yourself more. The person that Alexia had tried to bring out shrunk right back into it’s shell. Everyone on the team had been elated to see you find your footing with Alexia, it was the first time in your years at Barca that everyone started to meet you as a person and not just as a footballer. Alexia thought it had meant things were looking up for you, but all good things came to an end.

You’d been appearing like you’d slowly been slipping further down a slope, the bags underneath your eyes getting bigger, your sluggish behaviour getting worse, your determination to do you rehab dwindling and your willingness to interact with any person at the club being completely non-existent.

You were anti-social at the best of times, but completely diverting from all interactions was new for you and Alexia hadn’t been the only one to notice, it was evident to anybody with a brain that something was wrong, Alexia had no idea though just how wrong it all was.

The coincidence of an away Madrid game during the time that it was clear you were tanking was something that Alexia was particularly annoyed by. There was no plausible excuse for her to stay back from the trip, she was the captain, and she was perfectly fit to play. Plus, she had no obligation to you, you’d washed your hands of Alexia months ago and whilst Alexia still felt lingering concern for you she couldn’t justify staying back for what could potentially be nothing.

That didn’t mean though that she was going to just leave you be, not when she was so certain that there was something truly wrong.

Alexia wasn’t exactly sure of the severity of your trauma. She knew that your relationship with your parents was frayed to say the least, that you didn’t talk to them at all anymore and every time Alexia had tried to ask about them she had been met with a cold shoulder. So after a few tries she’d stopped trying, she didn’t know what it was like to have a disconnected family, she couldn’t relate or empathise with your issues and it killed her.

She knew you took medications, she had no idea what, you kept your daily medication closely guarded, but she knew it had something to do with your mental health. She didn’t ask about it, Alexia had been through your shut downs with you, and she knew broaching the subject of your mental health could be so detrimental to your mindset. She let you show her as much as you wanted to, she ignored the scars on your body, ignored the way that she recognised the complete disregard you had for your body. It was clear in every single aspect of your life that you had a little bit less concern then everybody else did. You put your body on the line in football, in ways that made Alexia furious. You didn’t flinch away from pain, if anything you stepped into the line of fire.

You hid injuries, you hid sickness, you pushed through it all. It was terrifying for Alexia as a partner to watch you continuously put yourself on the line and act like it was completely nothing. By the end of your relationship it was getting hard to watch it happen.

Your ankle injury was a result of that, you hadn’t even been the one ton sideline yourself. It had fallen down to Irene catching a glimpse of your purple and black swelled up ankle after a training session and her marching you to the team physio to get it checked out. It wasn’t shocking to Alexia, but it did make her wonder how many time you’d chosen to hide your pain in favour of putting up a brave face and pushing through, in all aspects of your life.

Alexia was worried and yet she felt as though she had no right to be.

She’d let you push her away, knowing that in some way or another it could be hurting not just her but you, realisatically she couldn’t do anything about it. If you didn’t want to be in a relationship with her she couldn’t force you, but a part of her thought she might have let go a little to easy.

For her, you would be the one that got away.

She wasn’t ready to let you get away yet though.

Really, if she thought about it, it was Mapi who had highlighted that you weren’t okay, and that maybe it was time for somebody to reach out to you. Mapi had come to care a lot about you, she’d seen how broken both you and Alexia were after the split, Alexia was still functioning though, you seemed like you were losing energy for life as everyday passed.

Mapi had been the one to suggest that she’d check on you whilst everyone else was gone, Mapi being stuck behind with some minor twinges in her knee, it was more precautionary than anything that she took the weekend off. She was more then happy though to be a good friend and spend some extra time with you if it meant getting to the bottom of whatever had been going on.

Her intentions had been to bring around a fresh meal, her mama’s old tapa recipe that always managed to light up Ingrid’s face. If her tapas earned her a way into your apartment then she was hoping to sit down with you, maybe have a chat, watch whatever football watch was on. Something, she wanted some kind of proof that you were okay, that even though you were going through a rough time that you manage, that at some point you would come out of this funk and you would go back to the old version of yourself. Maybe better, maybe you would unearth some kind of happiness from you situation and you would be better off because of it.

Mapi knew the odds of all of that were drastically low, but she was also the optimist of everything, it was the reason that she was so good at making uncomfortable people feel more settled in the team. She knocked on your front door with a extra bit of pep in her, hope that somehow she was going to resolve all of the underlying issues that everyone had been expressing for weeks now but had been too afraid to unearth. Mapi was certain that her approach might actually help, that instead of being the authoritative figure that Alexia, Irene, Marta and Patri were as your captains. Mapi was here as a friend, nothing more and nothing less and she hoped that would maybe encourage you to open up to her.

Mapi waited at least a minute after her initial knock before knocking again.

Your car had been beside Mapi’s when she’d parked downstairs, so she knew you were home. It wasn’t late, but it also wasn’t early enough that Mapi could rule out the possibility of you being asleep. Alexia had shoved her old key to your apartment into Mapi’s hand before she’d left, there weren’t any instructions, but the pure desperation in Alexia’s eyes was making Mapi feel compelled to use it.

Her third knock on the door was met with more silence.

You were probably sleeping.

There were parts of Mapi crawling with the emerging feeling of anxiety, she just needed to see you. You’d skipped your gym session today, something that was extremely abnormal for you, it had been worrying enough for Mapi, but you not responding to her now was sending her into a full on spiral.

“It’s Mapi, if you could open up for me please chica, I have some food for you.”

Mapi doesn’t even hear furniture creak.

She repeats what she said again, and is met with complete silence.

“Chica, are you in there? Are you awake? Just answer me, you don’t have to open the door.”

Mapi, if she looks really hard, can make out the faintest glow underneath your door, maybe a lamp?

Mapi waits a few more seconds, and sprinkles in some aggressive knocks. She’s met with nothing in response.

She digs around desperately in her pocket for the key, her fingers eventually coming into contact with the weight of the key in the back pocket of her jeans.

She pulls it up to the door knob with regret coursing through her veins, she doesn’t feel good about invading your privacy, but she feels even worse about everything else, and it’s all enough to overshadow her concern for your feelings about being left alone. After all, you might just be asleep.

The key makes a click after Mapi turns it counterclockwise twice, Mapi reaches for the door knob, it’s the final barrier between her and you, and without much hesitation she pushes the knob down and it opens.

Mapi shivers with the frigid breeze that comes at her as she steps into your apartment.

As soon as her foot hits your wooden floor she can tell something is off, she doesn’t know what but she can just feel it.

Mapi walks into your apartment slowly, with a quick scan of your kitchen and living space she is certain the room is empty. She leaves her dish of tapas on the couter of your kitchen and surveys the room before hesitantly making her way into your hallway. The door to your guest room is open, so naturally Mapi looks in there first.

“Chica, I came in to drop off some food, are you home?”

Mapi, whilst she can’t physically see you anywhere, has a weird kind of sense that you are here, she’s just not sure where.

The guest room is completely empty, in fact, mapi is sure that there is dust lying on top of the spare sheets. She can’t remember the last time you mentioned having somebody stay, at the very start of your signing to Barca, occasionally girls from your National team would come and visit during breaks. Mapi remembers that time, she wouldn’t have said you were happy, but you seemed a bit more content. It was best Mapi had seen you before Alexia.

Mapi is fairly familiar with your apartment, between game nights, post game drinks and double dates she’d spent enough time in your apartment to know where everything was.

Your main bathroom was empty, leaving your bedroom and ensuite.

Mapi felt like she’d invaded enough of your privacy, your bedroom might be the over step.

But there was the clawing feeling, the same feeling that she’d gotten when she’d walked into the apartment that something was wrong, and she wasn’t going to be able to sleep tonight without getting to the bottom of it.

So with much apprehension, Mapi walks the rest of the way down the hallway and to the door of your bedroom.

Mapi swears that she has sweat through her shirt, even though your apartment feels colder than the Norwegian winter she’d recently experienced.

Her hands are all sweaty, the same they get before any match, she doesn’t know where her nerves are coming from, she doesn’t have anything to worry about, yet.

Mapi knocks as quietly on your bedroom door as possible, she’s made her mind up that if you are sleeping she’ll leave a note with her tapas and take her leave, she doesn’t need to disturb you.

“Chica, I came here to drop some food off, just make a noise and I’ll leave you.”

Mapi waits for what feels like eternity, and after a long stretch of silence she takes the leap.

She opens the door as quietly as possible, and feels defeated when she spots your complete empty bed.

Everything looks normal, in a weird kind of way. Your sheets are made up, almost pedantically. All the corners tucked in and pillows positioned like they would be in a catalogue.

The only light in the room is the light that is filtering in from your ensuite, underneath the door. It’s bright enough that Mapi can see around the room.

She wants to leave. But she can’t, not without checking.

There is a off chance that you’ve gone on a walk, an activity that definitely was not approved by your physios but she supposed you’d never really obeyed them in the first place.

It’s one last room, your apartment seems so devoid of life that Mapi is confident that it’ll be empty.

She tiptoes across your bedroom, everything about this feels so wrong, like she’s invading somebody’s life that she doesn’t even know anything about.

Mapi knocks on your bathroom door.

“Chica, if you’re in there, just let me know and I’ll leave you be.”

Silence. Nothing. Absolutely nothing. Not even a squeak.

Mapi’s hand is so sweaty that it nearly slips off of the handle on the door, she doesn’t know why she’s nervous, she doesn’t have any reason to be nervous. Yet it also feels like there are a millon under lying reasons.

Mapi plucks up the courage, because she has to, and twists the knob.

Away games are always a weird mixture of relaxing but also having absolutely no time to yourself.

Alexia’s least favourite part about away games is team bonding. Following the first team dinner of every away trip it’s customary to do some kind of team bonding exercise. She understands that it’s important, but after a long train trip to Madrid the last thing she wants is to spend hours trying to get out of an escape room with no phone and all of the younger girls talking her ear off. What Alexia wants is to get back to the hotel and sleep. Yet she’s stuck in a confined space with girls that she loves but wants nothing more to get away from.

Caro and Keira seem to be in the same mindset as her, the three of them all keeping as far away from the ruckus as possible. After two hours of the madness, Vicky of all people manages to get to the bottom of the puzzle and somehow unlocks the door, Alexia isn’t sure of the logistics of it and she doesn’t really care.

The girls all celebrate as the file out, but there is an overall feeling that everybody is ready to head back to the hotel and go to sleep.

Phones are handed back and Alexia almost pockets hers, to tired to look at whatever messages or instagram notifications she has. But it’s the sea of missed calls that catch her attention.

Alexia’s heart drops.

She’s got dozens of missed calls from Mapi and she knows from the minute she sees her call log that something is wrong.

All Mapi can remember is the amount of blood.

It was so red against your white bathroom tiles.

So much blood. Mapi was certain that there wasn’t that much blood in the human body, and yet it just kept leaking out, even as she pressed your towels to your arm, it kept leaking through.

She vaguely remembers going through her very basic medical training. Checking your pulse, it took a while for her to find it but eventually she does. She doesn’t know if it weak or it’s just her shaking hands that can’t pin your pulse down.

She uses a leftover hair tie on her wrist as a tourniquet, she doesn’t think it’s working but she has nothing else.

Compression.

She vaguely remembers her call with the emergency services, struggling to find words but forcing them out of her mouth because she had to.

The lady on the other side of the phone talks her through it, tells Mapi that she’s doing the right things, she walks Mapi through what to do if you stop breathing. Mapi thinks you are, your chest lifts every so slightly every few seconds, but it’s so subtle Mapi swears she might be imagining it.

The lady tells Mapi that eventually your blood should clot, but Mapi finds it hard to believe. Her hands and shirt are covered in blood, your blood, it’s everywhere, red and thick and it’s overwhelming Mapi. Your bathroom looks like a crime scene, a murder scene, and Mapi supposes it almost is.

When the paramedics show up, Mapi doesn’t know what to do, they’re so methodical. One of them talks to Mapi whilst their partner attends to you, Mapi’s hands are shaking, her hands, covered in your blood. She should have taken that extra medical course that they’d offered all the players at the start of the season, maybe it would have prepared her better. Nothing prepares a person for what Mapi just did though, no amount of medical training or training courses could ever prepare a person for what Mapi just saw.

The paramedic assures Mapi that she did everything right, that you wouldn’t be alive without her, and those words make it all worse. Dead. You could have been dead. The paramedic offers to take Mapi to the hospital with you, but she declines, she needs a minute, she needs to have a second to think about herself. The paramedic tells Mapi the name of the hospital they’ll be taking you and takes her name and number to give to the nurses as your contact.

They whisk you off right in front of Mapi’s eyes.

Your body is white, you look so lifeless.

Once you’re gone, Mapi closes the door to your bathroom, she can’t look in there, not at the raw amount of evidence that you’ve left behind. It’s already all over her body, she doesn’t need to see anymore of it.

She sits down on your tight sheets, and she realises that there is a piece of paper sitting at the edge of your bed, a letter.

Mapi cries when she sees it, she lets it all out.

It’s addressed to Alexia and Mapi doesn’t need to read it to know what it’s intention was, what your intentions were, if it wasn’t already confirmed then this only assures it.

Mapi leaves red finger prints on it, picking it up and collecting some of your clothes from your wardrobe before leaving your apartment.

Alexia clicks on Mapi’s contact with so much fear coursing through her body, she’s praying that it’s not here mami, not when Alexia is away.

“Ale-Alexia, thank god you picked up, gracias a dios.”

Mapi’s voice is quivering, Alexia’s not sure if she’s ever heard her voice like that before.

“Maria, what’s wrong? Why did you call so many times?”

There is a sob on the other end of the line, and Alexia starts to pray, to any god that whatever Mapi is about to tell her isn’t going to be bad, she can’t handle bad news right now.

“She was supposed to be sleeping, I was so sure she was sleeping. There was so much blood, I thought, I didn’t think there was enough blood in a person’s veins but there was so much of it, it just kept leaking out of her.”

Alexia’s heart and stomach are at her feet, she clutches for a wall, a solid form that she can rely on so that she doesn’t collapse.

“Who, Maria, who? What are you talking about, where are you?”

There is another sob, a deep sob, like Mapi’s being tortured.

“Y/n, I went to visist her like you’d asked, an-and she was, I thought she was dead.”

Alexia heart feels like it’s on a rollercoaster, like it’s returned to a normal level for a second, before plummeting even deeper.

“What do you mean Maria, what are you talking about.”

Somebody in the group must have realised Alexia’s discomposure, because she can feel a group of eyes on her, like everybody is trying to figure out what is happening on the other end of the phone.

“She left a letter, she-she I thought she was dead Ale, why would somebody do that to themselves? Why would she want to do that to herself.”

Alexia is aware that Mapi is clearly in some kind of post-traumatic state, that it’s going to be hard to get to the bottom of this but she’s managed to string the details together. From what Mapi’s said, you’re still alive, but it can’t be good, not by how Mapi has made it sound.

“Maria, I need you to listen to me. Where are you? Where is she? What is wrong with her.”

Alexia can hear Mapi trying to take some deep breaths on the other side of the line, somewhere in the crowd Ingrid is pushed forward, looking at Alexia with so much confusion. Mapi doesn’t often have anxiety or panic attacks, but if she were, Ingrid is certain that she would be the first person for Mapi to call, yet she’s received none.

“I-I’m at the hospital with her, she’s been moved to the ICU, I haven’t seen her yet but the nurses told me they had to perform CPR in the ambulance and that she was rushed to surgery when she got here. She’s been stable since but she’s in critical condition.”

Alexia doesn’t know what to do, she wants to be with you.

“Maria, I’m going to hand you off to Ingrid okay, talk to her, let her calm you down. I’m going to talk to the staff and try and figure out a way for me to come home, talk to Ingrid, okay?”

Ingrid looks confused but takes the phone from Alexia regardless, allowing Alexia to walk towards the staff, her face sullen and body hurting from the pressure of all of this.

Mapi thinks you look worse, somehow.

All of the wires and cords and the bags and needles make your body look wrong. Nobody should need so many weird connections, yet considering the state you were in Mapi is oddly comforted by it all, she wants you to be getting as much help as your body needs.

She still got your blood on her, one of the nice nurses had helped her to wash it off her hands and arms, and Mapi had stolen one of your sweatshirts she’d haphazardly grabbed as a replacement for her shirt, but she can still feel it on her body.

She’s been sitting in the same chair since the nurses let her in to your room, it’s next to the window, so when Mapi feels compelled to cry, or can’t handle looking at your body any longer because it gives her a flashback, she looks out the window at the bustling city of Barcelona below her and it oddly comforts her. Life goes on, everyone elses life goes on, but yours almost didn’t.

Her mind goes to dark places thinking about the what if she hadn’t of come to check on you? Mapi knows the answer to that question, even a few minutes later and your body would have been even more lifeless then when Mapi found it, except maybe instead of most of life being drained from you, all of it would have been.

They still don’t know for sure what it’s going to look like when you wake up, Mapi was hardly paying attention when the doctors came to talk to her, they were speaking so many words that Mapi couldn’t even pretend to know the meaning of. She remembers bits and pieces, the parts that she knew she’d have to remember in case Alexia called again and wanted an update.

You’d lost a lot of blood but they were working to try and replenish it, you’d needed nearly 100 stitches all together, the scars were all about 6 inches long and just almost ½ and inch deep. You didn’t hit any major arteries or veins, but you grazed one of them and that was most likely why you bled so much. Your blood might have not clotted because of the antidepressants in your system potentially mixed with the ibuprofen you were taking for your ankle. They don’t know when you are going to wake up but they emphasise you sleeping isn’t a bad thing because you’re body is getting the rest that it needs to repair itself.

Mapi doesn’t understand the measurements or the way medications work, she knows your body needs rest but she also desperately just wants you to wake up. Selfishly, even if it’s just for a second so that she knows that you are okay, so that she can stop blaming herself for killing you. She’s always going to somewhat blame herself for this, but you dying would be the straw that broke the camels back.

Alexia doesn’t think the whole way back to Barcelona, the staff managed to get her on the last flight out of the night, with Ingrid.

They both don’t say a word after Alexia briefs Ingrid on what she learnt from Mapi on the phone, it’s nowhere near enough information and it leaves Alexia’s brain stumbling, she’s so uncertain of everything.

There is a chauffeur waiting for them at the airport which takes them straight to the hospital, Alexia doesn’t even pretend to be flattered when the reception staff immediately know who she is and takes her straight to your room. She has one concern. Everything else is just background noise to her.

Seeing you makes Alexia feel sick, literally, it’s a few seconds before she feels the bile rising. It’s been building for hours now and she rushes into the bathroom adjacent to your room and ungracefully let’s her stomach go directly into the toilet bowl.

Once she’s done and she feels less like her heart is going to fall out of her throat she gets up and puts on a brave face, walking back into your room.

Mapi has tears streaming down her face, Ingrid is trying to talk to her but Alexia can tell that none of it is getting through to her.

“Mapi, what happened?”

Alexia wants to know, she needs to know, she needs to know how you got here.

Mapi is shaking, her whole body, it’s almost scary the way that her body vibrates against the chair she’s sitting in.

“I-I went to check in on her, dios mios, it was so cold, she was-she-.”

Ingrid stops Mapi.

“Alexia, we can do this later, she can’t handle this right now.”

Ingrid looks as terrified as Alexia feels, but her fear is for Mapi, it makes sense, Mapi is the love of her life. Alexia doesn’t think she’s entitled to the same fear, she let you go.

“No-no, she wants to know.”

It’s clear that every word is pulling Mapi further and further apart, but she pushes through.

“I-I just needed to see her, I went through all the rooms until I got to her bathroom.”

She lets out a sob before continuing.

“There was so much blood, it was all coming from her arm, I tried my best, I tried my best.”

Mapi sobs again, this time it’s so deep and guttural that Alexia is so horrified about what is to come.

“I tried to stop it. She was supposed to be sleeping, I thought she was just sleeping. She was unconscious, blood everywhere, and it just kept coming, it wouldn’t stop. I tried my best.”

Ingrid is murmuring words into Mapi’s ear, Alexia doesn’t know what to say, she actually can’t think of a single word to say.

“I called the ambulance, but she coded in the ambulance, they had to give her so many stitches, so much blood.”

Mapi keeps repeating the same words, over and over again, like it’s a mantra.

Alexia needs to stop it, for her bestfriends sake.

She walks to the otherside of the room, gently pushing Ingrid to the side so she can squat down in front of Mapi.

“Maria look at me. You did your best, you saved her life. You are no more to blame for this then anybody else is. You did so well, she’s alive because of you, she is breathing and sitting in front of us because of you. You did that.”

Mapi doesn’t look like she believes Alexia, but it’s a reprieve from whatever trance she was in.

“How about you and Ingrid go and get something to eat, I’ll stay here with her, if anything happens I’ll call you, okay?”

Mapi looks apprehensive to get up, but Alexia watches Ingrid give her a look and it’s the first time since Alexia’s walked into this room that she sees a little bit of normality return to Mapi’s face.

“Sh-she left you a letter. I think you should read it.”

Mapi pushes it into Alexia’s hands like it’s poisonous.

“Thank you Mapi, I will, go and take a break.”

Alexia presses a kiss to Mapi’s hand, before moving to allow Ingrid to help her up. Mapi is uneasy on her feet and for a second Alexia thinks she might collapse or vomit. She eventually finds her footing though and follows Ingrid out of the room.

Alexia looks down at the letter.

It’s got dried blood finger prints on it, she presumes from Mapi, it secures all of this in some weird way. This is all actually happening.

Alexia takes her time opening it, this is tangible evidence of all of this and a part of Alexia wants nothing more then for it to disappear, so she can pretend none of this has happened.

She wasn’t even there for it, she can’t imagine what Mapi went through, she already feels like every part of her has been stripped away with this.

She feels like she’s an imposter in this all, she doesn’t know what to do.

You’ve never expressed to her anything about family or parents, she doesn’t think it would be right to call them without your permission. She wants to call her own mami but that feels a bit silly, although she knows somehow her mami would give her all the right advice. She doesn’t want to talk about any of it though, it feels wrong. This is such a personal issue, she doesn’t even think she should know about it, she doesn’t have any right considering that Alexia could have very well contributed to this whole issue.

The letter is white, off white possibly, it’s hard to tell with the harsh fluorescent lighting.

The marks that would have been bright red at some stage have faded to a dull reddish brown, it’s imprinted deep into the paper.

Alexia flips it over, gently opening the seal with her fingernail and letting the flap open up.

The paper inside is the same colour, except even though she can only see the flip side it’s clear that there is black scrawl all over it.

Alexia could make it disappear, act like she read it, it would make it all so much easier, it would save her a lot of emotions that she really doesn’t feel prepared to feel. But she doesn’t get to make that decision, she needs to read this, for you and for her.

Dear Alexia,

If you’re reading this then chances are I’m already gone, if I’m not then something went wrong and for that I’m sorry. I don’t want you to think that any of this was about you, or that you or anybody else was responsible. I made this decision, I’ve been thinking about this long before you came and I would have spent everyday thinking about it, no action or intervention would have changed that.

I don’t know how to explain it, but life is different for me. I don’t experience things the same way, I don’t get happy when I spend time with friends, I don’t get happy when it’s sunny outside. I’ve tried it all, I’ve tried to make it work, tried to live life in my body. I think a part of me was always separate though, and as much as I’ve tried to make it work there is no point in trying to fix something that is always going to be broken.

Being with you was the first time that my brain felt quiet, that I kind of felt the experience of happiness that everyone else feels. You made it all better, everything with you felt better, it felt normal. All I ever wanted was to be a normal person, and you made me feel like that. It’s not fair of me to be saying that, you deserved better then me, it wasn’t fair for me to burden you with all of this shit. Fucked up is never not fucked up, you can’t uncrumple a crumpled piece of paper, it will always be creased. I want you to know that I didn’t do this to you, i did this for you. It wasn’t fair weighing you down, I know it wasn’t easy for you when we broke up, you deserve to focus on football. You deserve to have a good life, you deserve to be free. I don’t want you to feel bad, I don’t want you to feel like you’re responsible. Live your life, be happy, for me, experience it all, because I couldn’t.

I’m not myself anymore, although I don’t think I ever was myself. It always kind of feels like i’ve been different people in my own body, and this time i couldn’t handle it. I don’t want to feel devoid anymore, I want to be free. My identity has always been identified as being a good footballer, a great footballer, and I don’t even think I can say that I am that anymore. I am nothing, want to be nothing.

I’m sorry I never loved you back in the same way, I’m sorry I never reciprocated the endless graciousness and love tha you gave me. The smiles, the effort, the constant love, it was wasted on me and my biggest regret in life will be letting you waste it on me. It wasn’t fair, it’ll never be fair, because I loved you back and that perhaps was the most selfish act I’ve ever committed.

I’m sorry, there aren’t enough words that I could use to tell you just how sorry I am. I’m sorry that I burdened you with me, I’m sorry that I let myself be cared for by you, I’m sorry that you have to read this.

I’m sorry.

There wouldn’t have ever been anything I could have done to repair it, I didn’t want to live knowing that I would forever be in debt to you for this. I hope that eventually you will find peace in this, that some good will finally come of me.

Goodbye.

There are tears all over the page by the time Alexia gets to the bottom of the letter, she actually can’t comprehend what she’s just read, she swears that her mind must be playing tricks on her. Why would you think all of those things? What made you think all of those things?

Alexia feels sick again.

Did she make you feel that way? Did she make you feel like you weren’t deserving of living?

There are so many questions circulating her brain, and she doesn’t have a answer for a single one of them, because she doesn’t know. Suicide was your only option, one that could have been very permanent, it makes Alexia’s head swim. You believed that your only option to make it all stop was death. You found a permanent solution to something that Alexia’s considers a potentially temporary situation, had you reached out, had you tried to find help. She can’t criticise you, she can’t even begin to comprehend how hard it would be living as you have, and then having to try and talk to somebody else about that. A part of her wishes you had though, because maybe it would have saved her beind here.

Your body is the exact same it was the last time Alexia looked at you, but for some reason you feel different.

Alexia reaches out for your hand, it’s the arm that’s not covered in bandages. Your hands are cold, but she tries to ignore it. She focuses on the feeling of movement underneath her own hand, it’s the only real tangible proof she has that you are here with her, that you are alive.

Sure there is a beeping heart monitor, and other signs, but she just wants to feel you.

She holds your hand, because she swears that she’ll slip away. Alexia doesn’t know what to do, she doesn’t know how to help you but she promises herself that she’s going to be here, that she isn’t ever going to let you experience life the same way that you did without her being there for you.

—————————————————————

thoughts appreciated …. part 2?

another reminder that if you ever need anybody to talk to i am here, your life is worth living, you are worth it all. <3

[yawnderu]

Thin Walls — Keegan P. Russ x Reader

Dbf!Keegan collab with the amazing @moosch MWAH

Check out her amazing drawing on this<3

There were rare times Keegan felt like he may have chosen the wrong job. Right now? Covered in dirt and grime, seeking shelter in an abandoned building with the rest of the ghosts after a particularly hard mission was one of those moments. What was supposed to be a three hour mission went downhill and turned into four long days of chasing down an enemy for intel.

The first thing he did as soon as the building was cleared was to fish for his phone, reading the thread of messages he had from you; ranging from telling him about your day, to complaining about missing him and how he owes you a shopping spree for going dark. He rolled his eyes, a deep chuckle rumbling out of his chest and escaping his lips. A new text caught his attention, scrolling down to read it.

Brat: [16:38]

I see you online, can we ft? Papa wants to see u :)

He stares at your message for a few seconds, considering his chances. Keegan looks like shit— eye black smudged messily all over his face, uniform dirty and muddy, a streak of dried up blood dripping down his forehead, and icy blue eyes so tired you would think he died and was never informed. He didn't want you or your father; his best friend, to see him at his worst.

Glucose Father: [16:40]

Sorry princess, signs too shitty for that. Send me some pics of that bratty face and maybe I'll take you shopping when I'm back?

He internally cringed at the text, rarely even using his phone unless it was to text your father and you. His fingers tap on the sides of his phone as he waited for a reply, putting the idle chatter of the ghosts in the back of his mind as he went to another room with the excuse of being able to get some sleep once and for all.

For a second, he ignored the phone vibrating in his hand, leaning against the wall and sitting down with a groan, sore muscles finally able to rest, even if only for a few hours.

Brat [16:43]

Sent 6 attachments.

His tired eyes drifted down to his phone, opening the message and being received by the sight of you, a smile adorning your pretty face. His gaze softened and his pants tightened as he noticed you wearing one of his shirts, fitting into it so much better than he could. He stayed quiet for a few seconds, listening to the chatter on the other side of the thin wall before his free hand drifted down to his growing bulge, holding back a groan as he palmed his sensitive cock over his pants.

"Fuck..." He whispered, hesitantly lowering his fly enough to pull his dick out, gloveless hand feeling the length of it before he started stroking slowly, moving his hand up and down while he looked at your pictures. They were completely innocent pictures, really, simply showing your pretty face and bright smile, yet he couldn't help it.

He was trying his best to be quiet despite how good jerking off felt after so much stress. His head was tilted back against the wall, eyes screwed shut as his mind came up with the filthiest fucking images, thinking of your lips wrapped around his cock, struggling to take him as he fucked your face. He could just imagine the noises that would come out of you as his thick dick was shoved all the way down your throat, a deep growl coming out of his lips as his rough fingers massaged his tip, spreading the leaking precum and using it as lube to jerk off better.

He swapped to another photo of you smiling brightly at the camera, holding up a piece sign. What a fucking sight for sore eyes. He imagined your pretty face glazed in his thick white cum, tongue tainted by his seed. His hand involuntary moved faster and harder up and down his cock, applying more pressure with each stroke until he had to bite his lip to stop himself from making too much noise, aware enough of the thin walls.

He couldn't wait to go back home to you, making you cuddle up to him and holding you like a lifeline, the plush of your ass pressing up against his cock as you allowed him to grope you, his hands grasping at as much as he could grab while his hard clothed cock rubbed against your ass. You're killing me, brat.

A deep, low moan came out of his lips his cock twitched in his hand, balls tightening up as ropes of thick, white cum shot out, covering his hand. He squeezed his cock a little bit tighter, making sure all his cum was out, taking another look at your pretty face in the selfies before he began cleaning up.

Evidence hidden and with his cock back in his pants he stepped back into the room with the other ghosts, instantly met with the amused faces of Ajax and Kick, clearly holding in their laughter.

"Had some fun, bro?" Ajax asked, not even able to hold in his laugh anymore, Kick following right after.

"Yeah, yeah." Keegan grumbled, rolling his eyes as he sat down and pulled out his flask.

"Next time I'll do it in the same room as you motherfuckers." Logan's frown deepened.

[1800-lemonadeg1rl]

Sniffle any louder

Natasha Romanoff x reader

Minors dni!! Masterlist°•☆

Summary - when you show up to work il lit aggravates Natasha that is until she sees your dire state

Warnings - mention of illness, nonsexual nudity, hurt comfort, as usual not proofread

Word count - 2k

A/n - I started rushing at the end because I wanted to have it out by tonight so the ending might not be as good srry

Fractures of pain shot through your aching body like icicles as you left the team meeting. God how you wished you'd just admitted you were ill this morning instead of letting your pride get in the way and pretended to the team that you were right as rain. I guess that's what happens when your on a team with literal super soldiers, you too start believing your above any illness or injury. Oh, but how wrong you realised you were when this flu hit you like a ton of bricks. The combined migraine alongside with the distrsssing chill of your bones left little energy left for you to do anything except lie down and rest, which you hated to admit and wouldn't ever given the choice, despite how sickly you'd begun to look.

Your usual bright eyes full of life and wonder became dull and bloodshot from the lack of sleep your blocked nose had caused you the previous night when you chose to ignore it. The skin on your face that was often painted a rosy colour now paled almost deathly looking, comparable to that of a ghost. Your unshakable senses, often remarked as some of the best had become overworked and dulled from the sickness using up all your remaining energy causing you not to notice people around you until they had begun to speak. The gravelly gasping and choking noises that spluttered from your inflamed throat were foreign to your usual bubbly voice.

Despite these stark and clear changes in not only your physical appearance but also how you carried yourself around the compound you had tricked yourself, somehow, into the belief no one around you would notice. Obviously you were unwell anyone could see that from a mile off and if you didn't think out of a house full of spies, enhanced beings and military personnel that not one of them would pick up on something up with you then you must have been seriously down with something.

Unlucky for you someone did notice after your sniffling had interupted their train of thought for the seventh time, it didn't take a genuis but she'd been ignoring the signs since you arrived. Natasha Romanoff had been trying to reread and correct a badly written mission report written by an incompetent intern. This had already been stressful enough for her without the woman next to her trying to desperately through her blocked nose instead of just going home. The first time she actually noticed something was up was when you nearly walked into the door, stumbling around like bambi on ice. This was something someone with your spacial awareness and high senses would never manage to do if they were as okay as they were telling everyone they were. She spotted it again when you began to cough like a smoker and at that like someone who smoked at least five packs a day, a thing she knew you were not. You'd told her a while back that despite your bad habits which were endless and definitely on show today that you never wanted to smoke because it reminded you of your mother. So unless you'd switched up on that which she very much doubted and had taken up chain smoking the answer was clear; you were ill, very ill.

She also questioned why you were even here, how you were even here. Natasha would leap at the first chance to avoid these dull meetings even if it meant admitting illness to the rest of the group. She'd actually faked being ill before to skip debriefs and instead head to the gym. At one point she had no clue how you were even still able to be alive and functioning with how shallow your breaths were. Everytime your mouth opened a disgusting noise alike to the disgust she felt at nails on a chalk board rung from deep in your throat. Aswell your ever scratcher voice that was beginning to drive her insane. It was one thing to come in sick, it was another to make yourself more ill by working harder than usual.

This had made her angry more than anything, angry at your selflessness. Angry no one else would ever do this, including herself. Angry you put working above your own physical health. Angry that you'd risk everyone else getting ill instead of taking a sick day. Angry you couldnt just admit your illness and leave.

Your eighth sniffle really sent Natasha over the edge as she turned to look dead at you and gave you a menacingly dirty look. A scowl that could kill glowering into your soul. Yet in feverly state you could hardly even register the spy looking in your direction as you still tried to process something said in conversation several minutes ago. Throughout the rest of the meeting she sideyed, scowled, gritted teeth, frowned, muttered under breath and cursed in your direction much to you ignorance. On an average day you could recognise what emotion someone was going through just by being in the same room as them and the tone of their breath but right now even with Natasha directly next you, practically right in your face you couldn't pick up a single negative emotion.

After the meeting you quickly stumbled in the direction of your room, hoping to avoid anyone on the way there, which you managed with much ease despite your worsening condition. Once you reached your room you shut the door without bothering with the lock. Stripped to your underwear and crawled back into bed without a sound. Curling up under your soft thick duvets you shivered and slowly cried yourself into a feverish slumber.

Natasha stayed behind to finish her reports, which she easily could have done hours ago without your incessant coughing and sniffling and all round ill noises. It only infuriated her more as she worked quickly, alone and welcoming the silence since the end of the meeting. When she finished up the work she was just about ready to give you a piece of her mind. And thats what she was gonna do. She had strong feelings about you prioritisation of work over wellness and she was gonna share them with you whether you wanted to hear or not.

Easily, she threw open your door and it hit the wall with a bang, enraged she didnt notice your crumpled whimpering figure writhing under the duvet.

"Sniffle a little louder next meeting." She comments loudly and sarcastically before instantly wincing at the sight of you in the bed.

Instantly her whole demeanour changes into one of care and pure unhidden worry. Natasha crouched over your trembling figure on the bed. Quickly she removed the pile of blankets from overtop and pressed a palm to your forhead before just as swiftly pulling it away with a frown. You were boiling 38°c at the very least and yet your body was still shivering. Without thinking twice Natasha knew the best thing for you was a cold, very cold shower.

She carried your somehow still sleeping figure easily into the bathroom as if you were no more than a light weight to her, which you probably were considering her max dead lift. Gently and ever so carefully she sat you down in the bath before turning the cool shower on next to you. Adjusting it so the water pressure was lower than usual so that it maybe less of a shock for when you fully woke.

Soon after the water began to flow your eyes opened to the hazy view before you. Natasha knelt over the bath making sure you were just alright. When you noticed the water and the bath, definitely not where you fall asleep you began to panic. Quickly flailing much like a fish out of water. Thrashing to get out the bath and attempting to scrabble to your feet. Natasha noticed your sudden frenzy and much quicker than you could, grabbed a hold of your hands halting your movements while whispering affirming words to you.

"Shh sh its okay. Your just in the bath, don't worry were just trying to soothe your fever." She begins to rub your palms slowly in a way which soothes you and instantly slows your panic as you go to rest your head on the bathroom wall.

"Hm don't do that darling. Try and stay awake while your in the bath, just for now." She's says quietly afraid to worsen the headache you already had as she coaxes your head off the wall. "That's it good girl. You can do this."

Her small praises would have usually annoyed you and felt almost condescending but right now they were almost enough to make you smile. She was making you feel as if your feeble attempts to stay conscious were really doing anything.

"M' so tired." You mumbled out a response that slumped together into your mouth so it was barely understandable to Natasha yet she still smiled and nodded at you, not wanting you to feel any worse than you already did.

"That's okay sweet girl, the sooner we get you out the bath and some medicine down you the sooner you can sleep." All the while she kept rubbing at your hands and fingers to keep you grounded in the moment. "I'm going to find you some fresh clothes just stay here."

You nodded but the minute Natasha left your head flopped back against the wall as if magnetised towards it. Upon her return with fresh clothes Natasha tutted.

"You really aren't well, are you?" A small attempt at a nod on your part did not surprise her one bit. "See if you told someone earlier we wouldn't be here right now. You have to ask for help when you need it." She knew her words meant little to you in your current state but she wanted to start bedding them in now nonetheless.

"Now, do you need help getting dressed? There's no shame in needing the help."

"Uhm.. I think a bit." Your response was croaky and your voice was beginning to sound worse by the second.

"That's okay, I'll help you then." She gives you a hand getting out the bath and holds you upright as she helps fully undress you. In her panic to get you in the bath she hadn't thought to remove what you were wearing.

You weren't insecure about your body but something like this would usually not be on with you. But right now you knew you couldn't refuse the help Natasha was offering as you could barely even stand still yourself. So begrudgingly you allowed her to undo your bra and slip off your underwear before tossing them in the bath saying something about getting them to the wash later. Putting on the fresh clothes was easier than either of you anticipated as you didn't resist and her strength helped you from falling against the cold tile floor.

Natasha helped you hobble back towards your bed which you instantly fell against ready to embrace sleep again.

"Ah. Not so quick, first the medicine then sleep." She said softly handing you first a couple pills and some water. "For your headache." Begrudgingly you took them and Natasha smiled as she saw the look of grimace on your face finding it both amusing and adorable. "Okay sweet girl just the syrup left, this will help for your throat." You stared at the syrup in your hand with a frown. Just the smell of its contents was enough to make you dry heave and its colour wasn't tempting either. After two minutes of more convincing and praise you managed to stomach it, not all of it but enough so Natasha was happy enough to stop bothering you.

You knew after that you could finally emmerse yourself in a blissful slumber and with little care curled up, face pressing into Natasha who watched over you as you slept making sure nothing interupted your much needed rest.

Tags: @wandasfifthwife @yanaromanov @idkwhatever580 @stayevildarling

[nothomegal]

"Flashing warnings"

Pyramid Head x GN Reader

Summary: you've been with the executioner for quite some time, enough for you to have your own special bond. You were his, and that fact alone was enough for the whole Silent Hill to avoid you, well aware of what they'll find out if they mess around. However, this little rule is unknown for any unfortunate newcomers that get trapped in this cursed town, and today you've met one of these newcomers... One would think, seeing monsters avoiding you like fire should be enough proof to do the same, but... Eh, some people are way too stubborn and blind.

Warnings: typical violence and gore, (Y/N) getting mistreated by meanies >:(

Word count: 2.9k

(Y/N) been sitting on this old matress for quite some time, they've already tried any possible sitting position yet non made the book they're reading more interesting.

Pyramid Head, or how they began to call him, 'Pyra', left to hunt and punish whatever soul putrid enough to get his attention. He's been gone a good amount of hours and they haven't heard a single sound of his in the distance, no metal scraping against the concrete at the distance or any screams of agony from his victim, nothing. How many hours it been? Three? Five? It's tough to tell, specially when this town knows no day/night cycles and it's always foggy. Even though they're not sure how long it been, they can tell it's the longest Pyra's been gone.

They switch into a laying position as they begin to think about what to do now. They could totaly go out and take a walk if they wanted, but they're concerned they'll end up bumping into the people Pyra is hunting. No, they won't get punished but they don't want to witness a literal slaughter neither, and whenever something (literaly anything) dares to interact with (Y/N), the pyramid headed beast seems to go wild of fury.

This is some very serious issolation, but (Y/N) became fine with it and Pyra is not as bad of a company as he initialy was. Feel him close to them, his big palm resting against their body as a reminder that he's there, the random noises that come out his helmet whenever he seems content or wants to get their attention... To be honest, these little things became more than enough at this point, and it's not like they've used to be the most social butterfly anyways. And even if they were... Well, arguing with Pyra is useless, he never budges, and if (Y/N) starts to get unreasonable or the argument goes nowhere, he simply brushes his togue across their face, purpously waiting for the moment their open their mouth. And ta-da! Argument solved since (Y/N) is too shocked and flustered to continue and Pyra simply let's out a deep and amused rumble.

(Y/N) chuckles to themselves at this memory, when it happened the first time the face they made was probably priceless, and the way Pyra allowed them to hide their face in his chest so the shame goes away... Sigh, they hope he returns soon.

The hairs on the back of their neck stood up when they began to hear the sound of numerous people run and hurriedly yellsomething to each other. (Y/N) of course panics a bit, and to avoid any possible interaction with the group of people they sneak into the corner of the room near the door, so if anyone of the group peeks inside they won't notice (Y/N) right away. It also seems like the people are running away from something, something that is not Pyra because of the lack of known bulky footsteps and scraping sounds.

Unfortunately, their little plan went town the drain when the group of around five man bursted through the old door and attempted to close it, while the creature outside of it was desperately slaming itself against the wooden surface. (Y/N) turned completely still as they shrunk in their place, internally hoping that due to the intense moment these people wouln't notice then and would simply brush off their form as some inanimate object.

Unfortunately, one of the men did noticed them.

—"Hey Dave, there's another one hidin' over he-"—

The man couldn't finish the sentence as the creature from the other side managed to burst through the door, throwing the men on the ground in the process. Some of them stumble back, others pull out their weapons and point at the creature, who resulted to be a monster known as ‘Slurper’, take a guess why it's called that. Not the most difficult creature to deal with but definitely the trickiest, it’s very fast and definitely can handle or dodge some shots and hits from the group.

The monster crawls inside of the room, it’s elongated face making some slurping noises as drool and blood drips from its mouth. But the beast suddenly freezes mid-step, and very slowly and subtly turns it’s head towards (Y/N), making the men look at them as well. The monster suddenly lets out a whine, similar to that of a dog, and practically runs away at high speed, completely terrified.

The group stare at the door in shock, their mouth gaping a bit. (Y/N) remains stiff, their knees pressed to their chest as they think what to do now. The answer comes when one of the man, who seems to be the leader, stands up and starts walking towards them, his expression indescifrable, but his gaze definitely holding malice.

So (Y/N) jumps to their feet as fast as they could and make a run through the doorway and down the hallway. They can hear the group yell something as they chase them, their voices angry and irritated, which only motivated them to keep running since it’s now clear that these people weren’t kind at all.

Things turn significantly worse when they get grabbed by the back of their clothes and then tackled down on the floor, the impact was rough and quite painful which made (Y/N) release a pained whine. The man above them grabs a good chunk of their hair and presses their head agains the dirty and cold floor as he looks at them.

—“The fuck was that? How did you do it?!”— he exclaims strictly, his tone demanding.

—“D-Did what?… S-Scaring the- the monster th-thing?”— you nervously reply, your voice a bit shaky. —“I-It’s not really me, it’s the being tha-that ‘owns’ me.”—

(Y/N) knew they sound like they’re crazy, like they’re out of their mind, but it’s the best way they can explain their unusual situation. It is true, the executioner practically owns them, he has the power to claim and to keep them with him, to keep anyone and anything away from something his, to keep them eternally by his side, his and no one else's.

As expected, the man on top of them only scrunched his face with confusion and disgust, definitely thinking that (Y/N) is just another crazy ex-resident of this hellish town.

—“Yeah… Right.”— he slowly says.

—“Mathew, do you still have the tape? Bring it.”—

A clear sound of a duct tape being unwrapped made them shiver, uh-oh, they’re in a big-time problem. They attempt to wiggle out and keep running, but the man above them slams their head agains the floor.

—“Keep it still bitch, we just want to figure out what the fuck is wrong with you.”— he grumbles angrily and slams your head again.

(Y/N) could feel blood start dripping from their nose. Being forced to calm down since these men clearly aren't fooling around and are not afraid to hurt them if they need, they relax and allow another one to tape their wrists together behind their back, as well as their ankles.

—“You have no idea what you’re getting yourself into, the executioner will not have mercy…”— you comment, not even bothering to elaborate, knowing that these people are dead meat already.

—“Pff, executioner. If you’re of his property, then why were you in that room just chillin’ all by yourself?”— another man asks.

—“Because he can allow himself to do it, and because any smart creature knows to not fuck around me because of what they’ll found out.”— you say, your tone a bit sassier by the end.

—“Any smart creature, huh?”— the man that was on top of you suddenly grabs you by the throat. —“In my understanding, a smart creature will learn to shut the fuck up, I could easily cut your tongue off right now if I wanted but not sure if that will affect whatever effect you have on the monsters, so I'll give you one last chance to remain quiet, understood? You farm animal.”—

The grip on (Y/N)‘s throat was tight and it was hard to breathe, the male’s eyes were dark and cold, no hesitation in them as he said these threats, definetely not the first time he makes them. Believing his words, (Y/N) nods hurriedly as the lack of oxygen began to affect them. The man grins and let go of them roughly, basically throwing their body on the floor.

—“Aight, who’s going to carry their ass?”—

The men discuss for a short moment, until agreeing that the biggest one of them should do it. Ones everything was sorted out and (Y/N) was being manhandled in his grasp, the group resumed their walking.

The men were shocked, some of them even got smug, at the way the creatures avoided them now. What’s that? A monster does have guts to attack? A single sound or movement from (Y/N) was enough to set the creature from fight into flight. Each time something run away, the men would laugh and cackle loudly, clearly feeling like they've beat the system and are some sort of untouchable beings.

Silly bastards, they don’t know what awaits them.

It’s unclear how long they’ve been roaming around, but it was long enough for the group to get lost, again, and decide to take a rest. The man carrying (Y/N) carelessly (throws) puts them on the ground, face first, as the rest settle down as well. Non of the five bothered to talk or acknowledge (Y/N), though sometimes they would throw some random questions at them, but of course they'd never been able to finish the answer since one of the five would end up rudly interrupting them.

At some point (Y/N) began to ignore them, aware that they're nothing but a gag to these people. The youngest of the group seemed a bit pissed at being ignored, so he stands up and walks towards (Y/N)'s lying form, who was still paying no mind, and out of nowhere kicks them hard on their stomach, making the air inside of them leave in a violent exhale.

—"You talk and look at us when we speak to you."—

They say nothing, still trying to regain their breath. The man above them sighs and rolls his eyes before crouching down and grabbing them by their hair, to posteriorly pull them to their knees.

—"Listen sugar, just because you scare away the crap that lives here, it means shit to us. You're fuckin' helpless and at our mercy, so you do and act as told and when is told, understood?"—

Before (Y/N) could do anything, a sudden deafening roar resonated through the whole building and from an unknown direction. The noise similar to some huge unknown beast fiercely howling through something metallic. A shiver of anticipation ran through (Y/N)’s spine, Pyra must’ve found their drops of blood and figured out what happened, and now he’s on his way to take them back.

The other five noticeably tensed up and frantically looked around, as if trying to locate the creature through the walls...

Walls.

(Y/N)'s gaze was already focused on one of he walls, knowing that their lover would't waste his time in searching for an entrance. The man, who's still holding them by their hair, slowly drags his gaze to the same wall.

—"Guys..."— he says uneasily.

—"Yes, we heard that too, dumbass."— one of the other four hisses back.

—"No, guys, get away from the fuckin- "—

A loud crashing sound resonated behind the mentioned surface, followed by the well known heavy footsteps and scraping of metal. The other four quickly get behind the fifth and (Y/N), who was currently having the brightest grin on their face, relieved that he came for them.

—"{The fuck was that?!}"— one of the males yells half whispers to you.

—"That?"— you let a little hum as you close your eyes and look away so the dust doesn't get directly into your face. —"That is the reason why everything in here avoids me."— you say with the calmest tone possible.

—"Wha- "—

Another loud crash and a huge wave of dust cut off his question completely. While the dust was still on the air, the previous heavy footsteps were quickly approaching, making the floor shake with each step. When the men saw the silhouette of this massive unknown creature they paniced, since it showed no hits of stopping, quite the opposite actually. The one, that been holding (Y/N), pushes them roughly forward without thinking, actin on some desperate instinct.

—"Here! Take them instead!"—

The five were ready to run, but got stopped by their own shock when the monster reached out and caught (Y/N) before they fall on the ground. It was still hard to see what exactly the beast did, due to the still thick layer of dust, but the sudden loud and deep metallic growl that the beast let out was enough for them to defrost and set into running. They don't get too far though, since their legs get suddenly caught and tangled into a bunch of rusty wires and thorns coming out of the floor, whick held them still and cut their soft flesh with the mildest movement.

A small chill jolted through (Y/N) at the sight of the mysterious thorns. They knew it was Pyra's doing, he rarely used that hability of his and they learned that he only uses it when he's trully pissed. And he wasn't just that, he was livid. The sight of bruises on (Y/N)'s neck from the previous grab really railed the monster up, just how dares that filty mortal touch and mark something his? Only he has the privilege to touch (Y/N), to hold them, to look at them, to hear their voice and all the things they say in that calm and sweet tone they always use when they're happy... Just how dare they attempt to take all of this away from him? The executioner.

The monster tears the tape off (Y/N)'s wrists and ankles before putting them down, his movements a bit rough due his agitation yet he did his best to keep it under control.

He then rises to his full height, sword in hand, and slowly walks towards the group. The closer he got, the more desperate the man acted, pulling their legs out of the sharp wire-mess just for it to tangle around their limb even tighter.

The beast's first target was the youngest one, the one who had the guts to hold (Y/N) by their hair and threaten them, Pyra really didn't like that one.

The male has no time to even inhale to start begging, as the monster simply cuts him in half with his sword. (Y/N) of course didn't want to see the gore that is about to happen, so they carefuly and quietly leave the room through the hole their beast of a man made durning his enrance. The last thing they've seen before leaving was Pyra practically tearing one of the man up apart like paper, going specially slow to inflict even more pain.

(Y/N) is unsure how long it took Pyra to finish them, they simply remained sitted on the floor with their legs pressed against their chest and covering their ears to silence the screams and the wet gory sounds of muscles and bones breaking. They let out a yelp when their body is suddenly pulled up by a pair of large arms and is pressed agains a broad torso. Pyra held (Y/N) in this posessive embrace for quite a while, the mildes movement from them would make the beast growl and press them even closer.

(Y/N) however, still attempted to soothe their lover by gently nuzzling agains his chest and rub it with their hand.

—"I am so sorry..."— you apologize, though you both knew it wasn't really your fault. —"I was just hanging out in that room we've been before, and... And these people entered there while running away from another beast, and- "—

They couldn't finish the explanation since Pyra suddenly shoved their face further into his chest, muffing the rest of their little rant. The action, which embarassed (Y/N) a bit, also made them understand that their lover doesn't need any excuses or explanations, he's content to have them back and unharmed. They sigh softly and eventually relax in his grasp and going practically rag doll, in response and after some time, Pyra's body also relaxed a bit, yet his grip on (Y/N) remained strong and firm like iron, refusing to let go.

—"Pyra."— you manage to move yout head just enough to say it.

A low grumble resonated from his helmet and chest, though it didn't sound hostile, more like his version of 'hhmm?'.

—"I love you, thank you for being around."— you say honestly, as you move just enough to reach his neck area and kiss the little skin exposed between his clothes and helmet.

The little sweet gesture was answered with a low purr as Pyra's large hands roam around their body for a bit, caressing and feeling each curve through their clothes. The touches weren't suggestive surprisingly, which meant that this affection was genuine and not the product of his monstrous lust towards them.

They both stay like this for a while longer, (Y/N) saying and whispering things in a soft tone that Pyra absolutely adored to hear, and he kept holding them against himself, pawing their body time to time just to feel them more. Their warmth, their pulse, their breathing...

To feel them.

To feel them being all H̸̫̥͙̮͍̮͋͑Ḯ̴͓̦̻͈̜͍̇̃͋͠S̴͖̘̍̓̉̑.

[diorcities]

⠀   ⠀ ── 𖥻 ๋ 𓈒 ⭐ ࣪ ࣭ ◍ ᜔ being a sleepy head !

nct dream fluff headcanon.

jaemin. at midnight, the sheets tangle on your limbs as his fingers run down your spine in a deliberate gesture. your tongue tangles in your palate and feels heavy as you talk about trivial things while he listens patiently. smiling sweetly when you can't follow the thread of your thoughts at the speed you desire, and your eyes look one last glimpse into his loving eyes before plunging you into a deep sleep. your body is covered by a blanket and you barely hear his voice saying “let's meet again in your dreams.” warming the place where your heart rests.

haechan. he is a night person. even with his schedules, he usually has more sleep resistance than you. you've both put on a series that you've been wanting to watch together, and since I this moments don't happen very often, you plan to spend the whole day curled up next to him. his body is so warm, and his grip comforting, that you soon decide to leave him to go to the ethereal world of dreams. and among the semi-unconsciousness, you think you feel his laugh poking you, “unbelievable, why you choose that boring movie if you were going to fall asleep?” just feeling your body being gently drawn to his “i'll tell you how the movie ends in the morning.”

jisung. the different time zones had your internal clock pretty damaged and crazy, to the point where you slept all afternoon and were more than awake at night. therefore, your night endurance is greater than jisung's. even on his day off, the poor boy does nothing but sleep. silence settles in the room when you know he's not listening to you anymore, hearing to the slight snoring of the boy with the cold nose on your neck, feeling him stir between dreams, “oh- fuck,” he murmurs, nuzzling his face, “did i fall asleep?” he asks. “pretty much, yeah.” you hear his muffled laugh, but deep down it makes you happy that he rests properly, especially when you know his workday. his only response is get closer to you. “keep talking, i swear i won't fall asleep this time.” quick spoiler: he did.

mark. it is a habit to put on a film and not pay attention to it while talking and using it as background noise. both of you have fairly tight schedules, and believe it is possible to do everything at the same time, such as ordering food delivery and chatting while watching a movie. but honestly, you are so exhausted, that the film takes a back seat while you both have your intimate moment full of kisses and caresses. it's impossible not to fall asleep for both of you. and even in the limbo of dreams, you're there with him, and he's talking to you while he sleeps, “i love you.”

renjun. he does not usually rest for long, and many times (only when you are aware that he is not by your side sleeping) you see him at his desk writing new entries in his diary, or painting with his watercolors. you are aware, too, that he does that when he is very overwhelmed or overloaded with things. and even when he goes back to bed the moment you notice his absence and wake up, or call his name, you worry that he's keeping him hidden from you; the way he uses art to release all the weight that keep him awake. “you scared me,” he pronounces shyly when you approach him and rest your head on his shoulder, “i woke you up? forgive me...” he stops his word when you shake your head, “should we go to bed, then?” he wonders, but again, you deny. “finish this first, love.” you smile tenderly, snuggling into him as he returns to his drawing: somewhat kind of similar to you.

chenle. having a tight schedule makes it difficult to see chenle often. you never seem to coincide because you leave first thing in the morning and when you arrive exhausted to sleep, chenle returns until late at night. he scolds you on occasion when you insist on staying up even when you both know that means you'll feel sleepy at work. in the end, he lets you do what you want, because deep down, he misses your long chats before going to bed. “so... one of my... coworkers said...” your eyelids close on their own, you swear by your life. and your tongue feels so heavy, but you must keep going, because seriously, seriously it's funny, “have you- seen my... sandwich?... and i said..., it's in...” chenle waits for the punchline while he strokes your hair, but it never comes, so with a amused smile dancing on his lips, he turns off the lamp. “your mouth?” he wonders at the ceiling, widening his eyes, “the toilets?”

jeno. the letters change places when you look at them for a long time. you blink, your eyelids heavy linger towards the empty coffee cup next to your notes; your attempt to do an all-nighter has been unsuccessful as you feel the sleep spell take control of your body. “come, darling,” seems to whisper sandman in your ear. as you are in the limbo between the two universes, your body seems to float and be welcomed by his warm embrace, followed by the gentle movement that lullies you back when jeno takes you to his room.

[yorshie]

Hello, fellow raccoon here 🦝 If it’s not too much trouble, could you write about sharing a bed for the first time with the Bay!verse turtles?

Ah! Another raccoon! Thank you for the request, I had a lot of fun writing this one! I went with head canon style.

Bayverse x reader, SFW other than bedshare, set in 2023 so turtles are 24-25

Tags: @jackalope-in-a-storm @tmnt-tychou

MICHELANGELO

This sweet turtle got his nest all ready when he heard you were finally spending the night. Brought in your favorite snacks, hunted down all his extra pillows from around the Lair, and restocked his mini fridge in case you got thirsty.

So when the time finally came and you go drop your bag off in his room, there is not a free spot to be found. His bed is a mountain of pillows and blankets, the small coffee table shoved in front of his tv has everything from pizza, microwavable food, and what looks like three different flavors of cookies piled on top of it.

Not gonna lie, its a bit intimidating. You might even have faltered, if sunshine boi wasn't right behind you with your toiletry bags, happy go lucky energy rubbing off until it felt like the spotlight wasn't directly on you.

the rest of the night is spent in typical Mikey fashion, a.k.a. a game and movie marathon. His brothers occasionally wander past his open door to say hello and to see what the two of you are up to. They might have a bet running on how much Mikey smothers you and how long you'll allow it. Even Splinter is in on it, thought the old rat refrains from making an appearance so his youngest doesn't feel like he's doing something wrong. He wants to marry his sons off eventually, after all.

When you eventually get tired and it's time to delve into the towering abyss of pillows that have taken over his bed, Mikey's territorial side makes an appearance. The door gets shut and locked to avoid anyone that might think it's a good idea to pull a prank (none of his brothers would but Mikey is paranoid because he is the prankster), and he wastes no time diving in after you for some cuddles.

oh. ok, maybe there's too many pillows, because now he can't find you! He's lost his significant other! Cue a mini chase where most of his bounty ends up in the floor in his search. You are not getting out of cuddles. No amount of wiggling or hiding will save you.

the actual cuddling is quite nice. Mikey's warm and his bicep makes for an excellent pillow. He likes to lay face to face, with your head tucked under his chin, limbs entangled and churring up a storm that you knew would have his brothers wincing in second hand embarrassment if they ever heard all the turtley noises he made when it was just the two of you.

He definitely snores, though. And farts in his sleep. Fact of life, don't get mad, because we all do it sometimes, most of us just aren't a mutated turtle man with a noxious gut fueled by pizza and sour patch kids. Dutch oven him with his own farts as payback.

in the morning you'll definitely wake up first, though as soon as you start to move Mikey will be alert. Call it sixth sense, but all the turtles are hyper aware of their own personal spaces and who's in them. I hope you weren't planning on getting an early start that morning, because now that Mikey's awake he's ready to continue the movie that you getting sleepy paused the night before. While getting more cuddles and eating breakfast in bed, of course.

LEONARDO

he internally started creating lists as soon as you accepted his sleepover proposal. Panics a little and moved the date once to make sure his sheets are washed the day before. Everything in his space has to be perfectly so. If someone interupts his cleaning and prepping, they better expect to have their head bitten off. Will have a literal panic attack if you arrived early.

You, of course, notice nothing out of place when he presents his room for your inspection. Yes, you read that right. This turtle will practically sweat as he waits for your verdict on whether the nest is good enough. No, he doesn't realize what he's doing. If you pick up on it don't tell him or else he might start panicking again.

The two of you will actually not spend too much time besides sleeping in his room, most of your time will be hanging out in the main living area. This serves two purposes: as the eldest Leo wants you to get along with all his brothers, and two, the thought of his bothers coming by his room to say hi to you absolutely drives is reptile brain crazy. So you'll eat and hangout with everyone else, and try not to laugh at the subtle teasing you know your turtle is going through with the whispered jokes and laughter that seem to stop every time you turn around.

When it gets late enough and everyone starts peeling off to do their own thing, you'll have to let Leo know you are ready to go lay down. Hilarious if you think He's going to suggest it's time to head to bed to you, he's trying his hardest not to think of the words "you" and "nest - BED! he meant bed!" in the same sentence.

when you finish your nighttime routine and make your way back to Leo's room, don't be surprised to find him on a makeshift pallet on the floor. There is no way you couldn't have seen this coming, but don't worry, there's an easy fix. Simply get in his bed, close to the wall, and start shivering. Loudly. Ham it up. In no time flat you'll have a turtle sneaking up next to you to keep you warm, though at first he will be hesitant. Cuddling you in the privacy of his own room with the expectation of sleep is very different from just chilling with you.

despite Leo trying to be a gentleman during the beginning, leaving you a bit of space and trying his hardest not to crowd you, by an hour in he will be wrapped around you. As he slowly gets tipped closer and closer to the edge of sleep, the more loose he will become. And once he gives in and gets used to the cuddles, he will never want to stop.

He clicks and chirps in his sleep sometimes. You woke up thinking there was a baby bird or something in the room, only to discover the high pitched noises were coming from him, before he transitions into deeper churrs from his chest right in front of your eyes. If you keep very still and quiet he might not wake up, but he will be traumatized if he does and discovers he makes these noises

There is very little chance of you waking in the morning before Leo. This turtle gets up early, but maybe just for today he can slip back next to you, after morning training, just to feel close to you for a bit longer. When you wake up you could just spend the morning talking, he won't mind being lazy as long as it's with you

You'll most likely be the one making breakfast if the other brothers aren't up yet, as Leo is banned from making anything other than tea or using the strict guidelines Mikey placed next to the microwave. But, he is an excellent sous chef, and after you're both fed he will be quick to suggest an activity so the two of you can hang out longer. Just know he's already weighing his chances of getting you to spend the next night as well.

DONATELLO

Dee had about 50 reminders set in the days leading up to your first sleepover, and a mental list he was practically grappling with in between projects. Anytime he'd focus on what was coming up too much, the butterflies would start going haywire in his stomach and he was likely to drop whatever it is he's holding at the time

Needless to say, he was in a bit of a panic by the time you showed up. Technically speaking, logically speaking, he knew his bed and room where both clean. And he knew you liked spending time with him, so why the anxiety? Why the nerves? He's so nervous, he doesn't even realize you've arrived, moved around his habitual pacing to set your bag on his bed, and now you're simply watching him with fond curiosity.

He shrieks when he finally notices you. Practically has a heart attack and knocks over at least four stacks of meticulously arranged cds and various technological components. Eventually joins in your laughter after he's calmed down enough to see the humor in the situation.

Just this once, Donnie has cleared his timetable of various projects to focus soley on you. That isn't to say that before he's blown you off or ignored you, but by now you are well aware how hard he has to work to contain his wandering mind, al lthe little tips and tricks he uses to keep his focus on the here and now and not bouncing from idea to idea.

The two of you will not be spending too much time out in the main area. The time it takes the two of you to procure dinner is more than enough brotherly interaction for the tall turtle. Not to mention, it turns almost awkward as the other's try desperately to not make prolonged eye contact with anyone else. They learned a long time ago not to tease the brother that controls all their devices and the access to the wifi.

Once Donnie and you are comfortable back in his room, the true hang out will begin. You'll play rock-paper-scissors to pick a movie, Donnie always lets you win, but he gets to pick the music that plays in the background. If you want, he'll access his computer and set up the program to make the lights in his room dance to the beat. Curled up in his arms, it is the easiest place to fall asleep, surrounded by fluttering lights that mimic being underwater.

Donnie may not actually sleep, but he stays with you the entire night. If you wake at all it might be to the idle scratching of pen on paper as he writes, his hand moving in your hair or along your back, or to his soft breaths caught in a light doze, a soft churr rumbling in his chest. If you're also the type to burn the midnight oil, you both might stay up talking long enough that the morning slowly creeps up on you before you both pass out.

Splinter often stops by the Lab in the morning on his way to meditate, if only to wrap a blanket over his son's shoulders and move his glasses to a safe spot. It's an ingrained habit, so much so that it doesn't even register that you spent the night until he quietly opens the door. He takes on look at the two of you holding each other close, and turns away with a smile.

Dee can cook, but most likely he'll order from the diner one block above their preferred manhole cover, and the two of you will sneak out for eggs, bacon and pancakes before secreting it away in his room so you don't have to share.

RAPHAEL

If the two of you are close enough for a sleepover, Raph is going to be the calmest of his brothers about you being in his personal space. Sure, he'll clean up, make sure all his dirty clothes are in his hamper and all the drawers actually shut on his dresser, but don't expect much in the way of fanfare.

He doesn't care where you wanna hang out in the evening, as long as you're comfortable. If you're out in the Lair proper however, get ready for some brotherly jockeying. Mikey almost can't help teasing Raph about having a guest over for the night, but the bigger brother will take it in stride as long as its only Mikey. Donnie tends to stay out of the limelight when it comes to teasing, but you better hope Leo doesn't so much as raise an eye ridge in Raph's direction. To be fair, the blue turtle is likely only drawing attention to how soft for you Raph is, but the two of them earning a trip to the Ha'shi might put a bit of a damper on the sleepover.

Leo's right though, Raph is completely soft for you. You want something to eat? He'll go get it for you without even a huff. You want popcorn for the movie? He'll bring back soda as well. You ask how much he can bench? He'll toe the line between showing off and making sure he can actually handle the weight. You neck hurts from having to crane around him to watch the movie? He'll lay on the ground and let you splay across his shell. You blink at him and sleepily ask to be carried? You're already up in his arms before you can even finish the sentence.

When it comes time to sleep, Raph will insist you take the inside of the bed, close to the wall, but he's thought ahead and gotten you your own pillow so you don't have to share with him. Yes, technically its from Mikey's room, but don't worry he disinfected it with a shit-ton of Lysol and Frebreze and washed the cover. This doesn't mean he doesn't want to cuddle, but of all the things Raph understands in his life, the very first few are the difference in size between the two of you, just how much he weighs, and how strong he is. So he'll tuck you against the wall and lay out on his stomach in one of the few positions that makes it hard for him to tip over. There's just enough room between the lip of his shell and the mattress for you to slot yourself against him, and he'll take the opportunity to slide his arm around your waist and bury his snout in your hair.

He'll hold you there throughout the night, breath slow and even. If you wake, be prepared that any movement will rouse him. He can't exactly help it, and he tries not to make you feel guilty over it, but you can always make out the green shine of his eyes peering down to make sure you are ok before he drifts back off again.

This turtle churrs sometimes in his sleep, but it's not the cute or soothing churr of contentment. No, someone parked a diesel engine in his man and is revving it like he's driving up an inclined gravel mountain road. The only way to get him to stop is to poke the thin strip of skin along his side, repeatedly, until he snorts and shifts. 50/50 chance the shifting will stop the churring. If not, you'll have to repeat the process.

In the morning, he'll dip before you wake, and come back to the room with warm pastries and whatever he's seen you drink in the morning. If you want your breakfast right away however, you might have to bribe him with turtle smooches as he tries to steal back his spot and catch up on the cuddles he's missed being a good boyfriend. Yes, he's holding you hostage, unless you want to try climbing over him. You might succeed if you make him laugh.

At some point in the day, after breakfast and whatever morning routine you keep, Raph will ask you what you want to do. If you want to go home, decompress, he'll take you home, but if you want to stay again and hang out some more you'll get to see the sweetest, softest smile break across his face.

[chosok-amo]

THE IT GUYS.ᐟ

one day your boss asks you to keep an eye on an IT guy who is fixing his computer— who knows two young men— 10 years younger than you can fix a lot of things than just a computer

content warning : satosugu! smut, age gap, threesome

you picked up the phone as it rang for the second time. you knew by the sound of the ring that it was an internal call and weren’t surprised to hear your boss’s voice on the other end of the line.

“Can you come through y/n please,” he said.

“Sure, Mr. Kento,” you answered. “I’ll be right there.”

you got up from your desk and walked over to the adjoining door that took you into your boss’s office. you always wondered why he didn’t just come across and stick his head around the door when he needed you, but it didn’t seem to be his style and he always phoned you. you entered the office and walked across to sit on the opposite side of the desk from your boss, Nanami Kento. He seemed to be busy trying to finish writing something and you waited patiently until he looked up.

“I’m off out now and will be gone for the rest of the day,” Mr. Kento started.

“OK,” answered you.

“I’ve arranged for the IT guys to come in and get on with fitting out my office while I’m gone,” he continued.

“OK,” you repeated.

“Can you just keep an eye on what they are doing,” he asked. “Just make sure they keep the PC in the same position on my desk and leave the place like they found it.”

“Sure thing Mr. Kento,” you replied. “Is there anything else I need to be aware of?”

“No,” Mr. Kento answered. “If there are any problems just give me a call. my phone will be switched on between meetings so you should be able to catch me if you need anything.”

“No problem,” you said and getting up from the desk made your way back to your office. you left the door open and eventually heard Mr. Kento leave. around one hour later you were sitting concentrating on your work, when you heard a noise from Mr. Kento’s office. you got up and walked through to find two young men pulling cable wire and computer equipment into the office.

“You must be the IT guys,” said you.

One of the men smiled cheekily. “I can see there’s no fooling you,” he said. his little comment flushed you a little. The man had a handsome face and you could see the way his unsettling bright blue eyes suddenly roamed up and down your body. “OK,” you continued. “My boss told me to keep an eye on you.”

“That sounds like fun,” the man continued. “Is there any way you want us while you watch? We always try our best to keep women satisfied,” he smiled while looking back at you. you flushed a little more. the two young men looked around 10 years younger than you, probably in their early twenties. “No,” you finally answered and watched as the two men got to work. “Try to keep the place tidy,” said you.

“Yes boss,” the man said and turned to get on with his work. “Oh, by the way, I’m Satoru and this is Suguru if you’re interested.” you grinned. “What makes you think I’m interested,” you said as you walked back into your office. with the door open you caught sight of the men moving around your boss’s office every now and again. you had felt a little flash of excitement when the man had been speaking, partly at the cheeky innuendo about keeping women satisfied and partly at his handsome good looks.

every so often you would go through to see how they were getting on and Satoru always threw a few cheeky comments in your direction. Suguru seemed quieter, but you had caught his gaze lingering on you when he thought you weren’t looking. you began to get a little excited by the attention the two men were showing you and they noticed that as the day wore on you were coming through to see them more and more frequently.

finally, as the men had almost completed the work, they called you through. “Did your boss say where he wanted the PC on his desk?” Suguru asked you. you looked around. The cabling was all hidden from view and the place looked tidy. “You boys do a good job,” you said. “Like we say,” Satoru replied with a huge smile on his face. “We always work hard to keep women satisfied.” you smiled, but ignored the cheeky comment. “So the computer,” you said.

“Yeah, we just need to know where your boss wants it on the desk so we can finish the cabling,” said Suguru.

“Keep it in the same place,” replied you.

The two men got to work. Suguru at the side of the desk and Satoru got on his knees and moved underneath. They worked for a few minutes and then Satoru shouted to you. “Could you just sit at the desk and see that you can reach the PC OK.”

you walked around and sat on the chair. you reached out to the new PC. “It feels fine to me,” you said.

“OK,” said Satoru. “There are a few final adjustments, could you just wait a second.” Under the desk he looked towards your legs. your knees were parted slightly and he moved his head to try and see up the skirt to your panties. “Umm…, your legs are in the way, could you just move them.”

“What way?” asked you, not realizing what was going on at first. “Like this,” laughed Satoru. He put his hand on your knees and pushed your legs a little further apart. “Hey,” laughed at you, but felt a sudden shot of excitement as you realized that Satoru would be looking up at your skirt. “Is this necessary for the PC?” you asked.

“No,’ said Satoru, “But the view is really gorgeous from where I am.” you felt Satoru’s hand slide a little further up your leg and your excitement grew. you looked at Suguru. “Go lock the door,” you said and he could hear the excitement creeping into your voice. Suguru quickly moved to the door and locked it. you could feel the fingers running ever higher up your leg and moaned as Satoru worked them onto her panties. you slid down the chair a little and parted your thighs some more.

“Oh fuck,” you moaned as the fingers worked around your panties, your pussy starting to tingle in excitement at the touch. Satoru could feel the damp patch growing on the panties as he played. He put his chin on the edge of the chair and told you to slide forward. As you did you gasped at the sudden sensation of the tongue licking onto your panties. your breathing began to get a little ragged as Satoru went to work with his tongue. It was a little cramped under the desk for his huge body, but he was far too excited to worry about it and licked hard onto the panties.

As Suguru had walked back from the door, you had clearly seen the bulge growing in his pants. As he came to stand beside you he quickly pulled the hardening cock out and grabbed it in his hand. you turned your head and saw him stroking the hard shaft and bringing it closer to your face. you realized what a complete slut you were being, but it was too late to pull back. Not that you wanted to, but you find that acting slutty was a massive turn and you could feel your excitement surging as the two men started to really use your body as a dirty little sex toy.

you closed your eyes as you felt the tip of the hard cock being stroked onto your face. you could feel the little trails of pre-cum being left on your skin as Suguru worked his cock around. you finally turned your face fully to the side and let Suguru stroke the cock over your lips. you pushed the tip of your tongue out and could feel the hard shaft sliding over it as the cock stroked across her lips. Suguru pushed his hips forward a little, moaning as you parted your lips to let him slide the head of the hard cock inside. He could feel your teeth gently grazing over the sensitive head and it sent a shiver up his spine. He slid in and out a little, enjoying the sensation, before pushing forward a little harder to push his cock in deeper.

you clamped your lips around the hard shaft and moaned as they slid along the cock. you kept your head still as Suguru began to fuck his cock in and out. He finally pushed in deep moved his hands to the back of your head and tried to pull you harder onto him. you resisted a little as you felt the cock hitting the back of your throat, eventually, Suguru push his cock all the way in so that you were taking his entire length.

Under the desk, Satoru was getting more and more excited as his tongue lapped at the wetness of your panties. He finally wanted more and moving his head back, ran his fingers onto the panties and worked them below the material. you gasped as you felt the panties being forced to the side so that your naked pussy was exposed. Your gasp turned to a moan as you felt Satoru lick his tongue onto your pussy. The tongue pushed hard against you, opening you up so that you could feel it start to burrow inside. your moans got louder as you felt the tongue lapping at the wetness on the smooth inner walls of your pussy.

Satoru finally felt too cramped at being stuck under the desk and made his way out. As he stood up he was greeted by the sight of Suguru circling his hips as you took his full length in your mouth.

“Fuck,” said Satoru, stopping to watch the sight of the older woman taking cock. He suddenly felt his excitement surge and quickly moved around the desk. He made you stand up and watched as you managed to do it without taking your mouth from the hard cock inside it. Satoru moved behind you and quickly slid the skirt up around your waist. He wasted no time in grabbing the panties and pulling them down to expose your naked ass. The sight drove his excitement higher and he pushed himself forward onto it, forcing his cock into the butt crease and sliding it up and down.

Satoru reached out and grabbing an ass cheek in each hand, pulled them apart so that the underside of his cock was rubbing against the tight hole that had been revealed. The excitement of having your asshole stroked by a hard cock seemed to spur the excitement in you. you started to bob your head up and down hard on Suguru’s cock. Satoru worked the tip of his cock around your tight hole and then slid it down onto your pussy lips.

He could feel your pushing back onto him and you seemed desperate to get the cock inside you. Satoru quickly worked the head of his hard shaft to the slick opening and teased it around. He pushed forward and moaned as the tightness of the wet pussy closed around his cock. He circled his hips, stirring the head of his hard shaft inside the pussy, before he began to force himself forward. you moaned as you felt the cock push all the way inside you so that you could feel Satoru’s body grinding against your ass.

you wanted to be completely filled at both ends so you quickly slid your mouth down the hard shaft you were sucking. Suguru moaned as his cock hit the back of your throat and his excitement surged again as he felt your soft lips against balls. you were in ecstasy at the feeling of two cocks filling your holes and holding them inside you for as long as you could. you finally pulled back from the cock in your mouth gasping a little for air.

“Just fuck me hard,” you moaned and the two men didn’t need a second invitation. They grabbed you and pulled you to the center of the room, forcing you down onto your back. Suguru dropped down between your legs this time and used his knees to push them apart. He slid the skirt up and lowered his cock onto your pussy and you moaned as you could feel him stroke the head against your clit. It was a new experience for you and you lifted your ass up to push harder against the cock.

Suguru worked his hard shaft over the little hard nub for a short while before finally sliding it down to your pussy lips. you could feel the head of the cock sliding around in the wetness, getting coated in your juice. It finally moved to the wet hole and slid inside. Suguru teased it around gently before finally ramming it in, making you gasp at how hard the cock fucked all the way into you. “fuck suguru— Ahh, yess!” you moaned as Suguru began to fuck you.

As you lay being fucked, you turned your head to look at Satoru who had been watching the action. He was stroking his shaft and he finally moved forward. you got ready to take a cock in your mouth again, but Satoru had other ideas. He quickly stripped open the buttons of your blouse and pulled it open. He then slid your tits out of the bra cups and started to play with the nipples, stroking his fingers over them to make them hard. He got up and stood over you, straddling your body just above your tits. He then moved down and you watched as the hard cock closed in on your tits.

you could feel your anticipation rising as the cock neared and let out a moan as it stroked down onto your tits. Satoru worked his cock into your cleavage and made you push your tits together. He moaned as he could feel his hard shaft being trapped between the breasts. your tits were big enough to completely wrap around his cock and it almost disappeared from sight. Satoru sat still for a moment, just enjoying the sensation of his cock being squeezed by the soft tit flesh. He slowly began to rock his hips, trying to fuck his cock into the cleavage. He could feel his cock sliding along the smooth skin and it spurred his excitement. He sped up his movements, feeling the pressure building in his balls as he tit fucked you.

The two men started to work their cocks into you hard and fast and you could feel your excitement growing. It surged when you heard Suguru speaking. “Lets do her fucking pussy and ass together,” he said. “Fuck, good idea,” said Satoru. “I want ass.”

Suguru felt the two men pull off you. Suguru lay on his back and held his cock straight up. Satoru stood and pulled you up. He moved you to straddle Suguru and watched as you lowered your hips to the cock and took it back inside your pussy. Suguru reached up and pulled you down onto him as Satoru moved behind you and got to his knees. He grabbed his cock and slid the tip onto your ass, forcing it between the cheeks to find your tight hole.

“Fuck— ahh..” you moaned in excitement as you felt the cock press against you. This was another new experience for you and you waited for the sensation of your ass and pussy being filled with hard cock. Satoru pushed the tip of his cock hard against the hole, feeling it open up a little under the pressure. you started to squeal as the cock forced its way inside your tight hole.

“Fuck, go deeper,” you moaned and Satoru pushed forward harder. you could feel your ass being spread wide open and the sensation of your ass and pussy being fucked by a hard cock drove you wild. “yes, yes— oh, fuck! me.. fuck me harder!” you urged the two men to treat you like a dirty little cock slut and they began to fuck you. It was so exciting for you that you u quickly found herself reaching an orgasm.

Your squeals got louder and you bit your lip to silence yourself, fearing someone might hear. As the two cocks pounded you, you finally felt the orgasm burst deep inside you. “Shit, y/n! your pussy feels so good,” Suguru moans. The pleasure flowed from your pussy and ass to the rest of your body and you were suddenly shaking hard as the excitement took hold. you bit your lip harder to the point where she was almost drawing blood, knowing that if you didn’t the scream would escape your lips.

you worked hard to remain quiet as your pussy and ass gripped hard around the cocks inside you and it sent you ou to a peak of ecstasy. As the excitement finally started to fade you could feel your chest heaving. you urged the men to give you everything they had and they worked their cocks harder into her holes.

The tightness of the ass around his hard shaft caused Satoru to be the first to lose control. He could feel his balls tingling as they got ready to release. “fuck, fuck y/n, your ass hug my dick so good!” He worked to hold it back as long as possible, letting the pressure in his body build until it was almost unbearable. He finally cracked and let out a moan as the cum suddenly started to shoot hard into your ass. you could feel it being released into your tight hole and pushed back onto Satoru, clenching your ass cheeks to squeeze his cock. He kept pushing onto you, the pleasure of releasing his cum inside you making him moan louder.

Suguru gave up the fight to control himself soon after. He looked up into your face and the expression of pure pleasure he saw made him lose control. He fucked his cock up hard so that it drove all the way inside your pussy and held it as it jerked again and again, releasing streams of sticky cum into your pussy. As the two men finally calmed down again, you collapsed forward onto Suguru.

“So,” laughed Satoru. “Did we work hard enough to satisfy you?”

You was still breathing hard. “Oh fuck yeah,” you said. “I’ll tell my boss you did a real good job.”

[dipperscavern]

yes dippy we should talk about bi cregan with bi reader!!

imagine them recruiting northern hotties for threesomes 🤭

mmf: cregan with another man (preferably jace) giving her that double worship. cregan always has the upper hand ofc even when it's not a twink but another big broody northern they're sharing their bed with. and when cregan gets to top him while he eats her out and she holds eye contact with cregan as he's fucking that guy.

ffm: it's either the same way that she is the center of attention OR cregan and her tagteam that other woman and fuck her stupid. cregan with his big fat uncut cock and her with her tongue and fingers while cregan fucks the other woman.

- respectful anon

pairing: cregan stark x jacaerys velaryon x reader

authors note: oh respectful anon… i read (preferably jace) and absolutely shuddered. oh my god . i’m sorry the other ideas in here are wonderful too i just have to get this out before i go off my rocker

jacaerys arriving in the north, bearing the colors of queen rhaenyra, and being greeted by cregan stark — and his comely wife.

he can feel his breath hitch as soon as he slides off vermax and spots you, arm wrapped around cregans bicep. even though the snow crunches under his boots and the early winter winds seep beneath his clothing, jace feels his skin run hot. and this time, he cannot blame it on the blood of the dragon.

once you approach, jace gives you both a respectful nod of his head, before cregan greets jacaerys with a firm handshake. jace takes your hand, kissing your knuckles, and says the tales do not do your beauty (they don’t). you only smile, dipping into a small curtsy and playfully telling him not to make you blush.

he spares a glance at cregan, a small worry of overstepping dancing in his gaze, but cregan only nods — a smirk adorning the lord of winterfells lips.

the very lips that have grown accustomed to the feel of yours.

the thought is shooed away as quickly as it arises. you’re married, and jace feels a pang of disappointment at the places his mind has a tendency to wander to. you’re extending your hospitality to him, he won’t disrespect you with such concepts (won’t he?).

once having vermax sorted, you & cregan then escort him to winterfell. cregan speaks of the north and its history, and jace replies when necessary, but he finds his gaze drifting from the lord of winterfell, and landing on the lady attracted to his side instead. jace, no matter how much internal scolding, finds himself ceaselessly returning to quietly study (admire) your features.

as you enter the castle, jace notices your cheeks are flushed from the cold. cregan, mid sentence, silently ushers you towards the nearest hall fire with the unforeseen hand on the small of your back. something unfamiliar stirs in him at the sight (want).

they swore vows to each other in sight of the northern gods, chides jaces inner voice.

but, no matter how much restraint he expresses, as his stay continues, he finds himself enamored.

enamored with the playful glimmer in your eyes, the way your hips sway as you walk, how your dress hugs your curves, your light teasing, your love for lemon cakes, how you always catch jacaerys’ eye even from across the room. he’s utterly, hopelessly enthralled.

and even worse, he’s given himself away

you, jace, and cregan have been proper. careful not to overstep, but aware enough to silently acknowledge the underlying tension that sits between you. jacaerys would’ve been content with this dynamic for the entirety of his visit, it would’ve been a good exercise of self control — if the day in the kitchens didn’t change everything.

the skies weep, the raindrops making a soft pattering noise on the windows all around the castle. it's a brief change in atmosphere, and gives him time to get used to the more intimate aspects of winterfell.

rain trapping you inside, you and cregan had offered to give jacaerys a proper tour of winterfell, to rectify the short one he had been given upon his arrival.

this particular instance, that made him run as hot as his temper, takes place as the tour winded to an end, and you all ended up in the kitchens. the same kitchens that jace, when supping with you both from then on out, can't stop thinking about.

you had pulled them in, relishing in the idea of swiping a few small pastries to hold your sweet tooth over until dinner - assuring him that the cooks were quite used to you and cregans troublemaking, & were sworn to secrecy with a toothy grin (his heart skipped a beat at the sight).

you had been successful in your "stealing", but the problem arose when cregan had been conversing with one of the cooks, as you and jace stood over the counter, bringing the two small lemon cakes to your mouth.

you were conversing about something — what that was, jacaerys couldn’t remember if his life depended on it. once finished with your pastries, you had some leftover cream on the corner of your mouth. of course, since you're the worst minx to ever bewitch him, you raise a thumb to the corner of your mouth, swiping it off. then (of course), you bring it to your lips, maintaining eye contact with jace, and (of course) suck it off.

whatever he was saying had instantly died on his tongue.

his response was his parted lips trying to bring in air to send to his lungs so he could breathe, but, of course, you seem to have taken his breath too. suddenly the kitchen feels hot, ovens contributing to a warm atmosphere that had quickly turned blazingly overwhelming.

his gaze stayed trapped on where your thumb met your (soft looking) lips, as every part of the white cream had been sucked off.

you were most surprised & pleased by his reaction, indeed. you had an inkling the prince might be taken with you, but you wouldn’t act without certainty. and here you had it, certainty of the utmost stature had fallen right into your hands — watching his gaze flicker from your eyes, to your lips, your cleavage... and back to your lips again.

cregans voice snaps jacaerys out of the trance he had found himself in, and he’s ashamed to say he had to ask cregan to repeat himself. if he wasn’t devoting all of his energy into acting normal, he would see the way cregan glanced at you with raised brows seeing the smile on your face.

regardless of how it came to be, you’ve caught on. and jacaerys is seriously considering how dearly he’d be missed if the ground were to open up & swallow him whole.

your actions now have a certain weight behind them, confidence guiding your every step. hands “accidentally” brushing each other, glances from across the room, subconsciously leaning into each others warmth, flirtatious “jests” that grow bolder by the day, always teetering on the line of jesting and meaning it (you always mean it). you fix his crooked tunic for him, shifting it the right way. jacaerys pretends the warmth emanating from your hands doesn’t make him dizzy.

still, even so, jace had been showing remarkable restraint — not allowing his princely regime to falter (much), and keeping in his remarks. until you both spoke about vermax.

you stood atop one of winterfells walls, watching vermax fly, dipping in & out of the clouds. he was beautiful, and jacaerys would never abandon the opportunity of a conversation with you (or about vermax, of course).

jace told you of how vermax hatched in his crib as a babe, and you wistfully remark on your childhood dreams of dragonriding. he tells you you'd make a fearsome dragonrider. you say you'd made a good dragon rider indeed, but, instead of looking at vermax, jace finds your gaze fixed on him.

you poorly conceal the hidden tone of voice indicating you don't mean the green-scaled dragon in the sky above you, but the chocolate-curled dragon next to you. you don't do a good job of hiding the grin that threatens to erupt on your face, either.

jace feels a furious blush adorn his face, and the corners of his mouth tug up in a repressed smirk. his tongue darts out to wet his lips, his smile turning upside down as his gaze shifts back to vermax's soaring form.

"You speak truly. Any man would envy the dragon."

he pretends not to see the smile spreading across your face from his peripheral. you lean in closer to him, wrapping a hand around his bicep to punctuate your words.

"Men already envy you, My Prince."

he keeps his resolve as you walk away, but as soon as you're out of sight, he sighs — leaning his weight against the edge of the top of the wall, a shuddering exhale leaving his lips. gods have mercy on jacaerys velaryon.

after you sup for dinner, you and cregan escort him to his chambers, and jace feels taking on the entire green army by itself would be easier than this. trying to conceal his eyes being trapped on you, furious desire mounting in his stomach as guilt claws it’s way up his throat. it’s only by stroke of luck that you all walk in silence — he could not entertain a proper conversation if he tried.

does cregan know of your conversation? what would he say? what would he do? the very last thing he needs to be doing is disrespecting the warden of the north that he’s trying to ally.

these thoughts echo in his mind as you approach the door leading to his chambers. you three stop, jaces back to the heavy oak door as you and cregan stand in front of him.

“We shall see you in the morn, then.” says cregan.

jace nods, but his next words die on his tongue as you move from cregans side. his heart hammers in his chest as you saunter to him, standing on your tiptoes as your hand moves to cup his cheek. he subconsciously leans down for you, and you press a kiss onto the corner of his mouth, a breath to the right away from his lips.

seven save him.

his lips part with bated breath, eyes locked onto you as you pull away. his hands twitch with the need to pull you to him, and then he remembers your husband that’s standing right in front of you both.

jaces eyes widen, looking to cregan, but cregan only tilts his head.

his lips… is he smiling? as they hold eye contact, he spots amusement, content, and want (?) in cregans gaze, and then, the smallest of nods.

oh.

oh.

jace’s gaze flickers from cregan, to you, and back and forth a few more times. his breathing is unsteady as you return to cregans side, and you can’t (or don’t) hide your pleasure at his reaction.

“Goodnight, My Prince.”

he cant even manage a nod as you both turn to walk away, cregan shooting him one last look. the flustered prince of dragonstone retreats to his chambers, leaning his head against his closed & locked door — moving to fiddle with the laces of his breeches.

you and your husband certainly make quite the pair. cregan, steadfast, burly, & brooding (handsome), with a reserved playfulness only for you — and you, teasing, warm, & confident, with a seemingly reserved deliberateness to drive jacaerys crazy (not that it takes much, of course).

one night, when he thinks he's completely lost any hope of sanity, the gods decide to have a sort of cruel mercy on him.

it is lord boltons name day, and he has extended the planned celebrations invitation to jacaerys as well. you three depart as one, opting to travel by horseback instead of jace arriving on vermax days before you and cregan. most are surprised by his decision, indeed (did jace sacrifice his freedom on dragonback for the prospect of spending more time with you both?).

jace didn't know you rode horses. he acts like the swaying of your hips doesn't capture him, distracting him throughout the entire journey. you and cregan act like you don't notice (do you?)

you all arrive, and on the day of celebrations, allow the wine & northern ale to wash away your sins down your throat. cregans tolerance is highest, jace's is lowest, with you resting in the middle. his cheeks are flushed, and his prided self control has seemed to have left itself at winterfell. you converse with one another in a secluded corner, allowing everyone else to fade from view. you speak with loose tongues, and jacaerys feels cregans hand on the back of his neck, thumb creeping into his hairline.

you speak of the festivities, the travel, the gossip, dragonstone, and jaces own interests. he can see something lurking beneath your usual gaze, you were hiding something. your eyes flickered with uncertainty. no — you wanted to know something.

and then, the very question that broke the damn - sweltering with the combined pent up desire allowed to built over the last weeks.

"Are you untouched, My Prince?"

[toastykaykes]

Paint it Black (Ch. 1)

Minors DNI: 18+ Logan Howlett x Mutant! Reader

Summary: The meeting doesn't go as planned, your past comes back to haunt you. Only this time, your called to fight. Word Count: 1526

“(f/n), please come in. How was your day?” Professor Xavier greets you with his usual warm, kind smile as you step into his office. His voice, though calm, carries the weight of his authoritative role.

“Like always,” you respond, settling into one of the plush leather armchairs positioned in front of his desk. “They don’t know how much I enjoy teaching them, but it’s best not to let them know. Can’t have them thinking I’m some big softy now, can I?”

Charles lets out a soft, genuine laugh, glancing up from his paperwork. “No, of course not. That would be downright disastrous if they found out.” His eyes twinkle with amusement, reflecting his understanding of the delicate balance you maintain.

Your gaze drifts toward the large windows behind Charles, catching a glimpse of the students playing outside on the grass. The scene outside is a stark contrast to the intensity of the discussions that usually take place inside. “Am I just early, or was the meeting canceled tonight?” you ask, your discomfort evident. You long to be in your pajamas, curled up and away from the formal attire that feels increasingly restrictive.

“And here I thought you just wanted to enjoy my company,” Charles remarks playfully, causing a soft laugh to escape you. “They should be here soon. You, dear, just have a talent for arriving early. Not that I’m complaining.”

A flush of warmth rises to your cheeks at his statement. You appreciate his kindness, even if you feel undeserving of it. “Likewise, Professor.”

A comfortable silence falls over the room, the only sound being the soft scratch of his pen against paper. The familiar tranquility of Charles’s office wraps around you, offering a brief respite from the storm of thoughts swirling in your mind. Your eyes close for a moment, your head leaning back against the chair, savoring the peace before the chaos begins.

Charles’s gaze softens as he observes you. “You do know if you ever need someone to talk to, I’m here (f/n). I know you’re a very private person. Just know you don’t have to be alone.”

Your eyes drop to your hands, fingers nervously picking at one another. It’s a habit you’ve had for years, an involuntary reaction when anxiety rears its head. The quiet and darkness sometimes pull you back to a place of fear—back in that cell with those monsters. The thought of what you endured before finding refuge here is a heavy burden.

Charles knows some of the truth. He’s aware of your involvement with mutant trafficking, a dark chapter of your past revealed when he found you barely surviving on the side of the road. But the full details remain unspoken, a secret you guard fiercely. The idea of their reactions if they knew the extent of your past actions and choices is almost unbearable. You release a shaky breath, realizing how deeply his words resonate with your internal struggle. “I know, Charles.” The apology is unspoken but present.

Before Charles can offer more comfort, the door to his office swings open, shattering the peaceful atmosphere with a burst of noise. The team bursts in, their voices blending into a lively cacophony of playful bickering.

“Can you guys stop comparing those and be aware? We’re here for a meeting!” Ororo's voice rises above the din, trying to bring order to the chaos between Cyclops and the others.

“Well, look who beat us here,” someone remarks, though their identity is lost in the noise.

“Hi, guys!” you call out, managing a smile.

Scott, holding up a crumpled piece of paper, joins in the fray. “You wouldn’t have anything to do with this horrendous, unproportional, God-awful drawing I got from a student on the way over here, would you, (f/n)?” He presents the drawing of him firing his optic beams, clearly proud despite his grumbling.

Ororo chimes in, her voice smooth and calming. “Come on, you guys. You should be grateful any child considers you ‘heroes.’”

As the rest of the team filters in and finds their seats, your gaze drifts to the corner where he stands. His stance is relaxed but alert, suggesting he’s ready for action if needed. Even in the dim lighting, his muscular build is apparent, and the weariness in his features speaks of countless battles fought. His hair, tousled in a way that makes him seem almost softer, only adds to his intense allure.

When his eyes lock onto yours, the focus is piercing and palpable. His gaze is sharp and unwavering, cutting through the space between you with an intensity that feels almost tangible. You find yourself blushing under his scrutinizing stare and quickly turn your head forward, hoping to hide your embarrassment. Damn it, why does he have to be so... intense?

“Alright, everyone, there’s a matter that is extremely important we need to discuss,” Charles says, regaining the room’s attention. His tone shifts to a serious and resolute note. “We’ve received intelligence about a mutant smuggling ring known as Venos, operating in a remote location. They’ve been trafficking mutants and are involved in particularly egregious activities.”

The room falls silent, the gravity of the situation sinking in. Your heart sinks at the mention of the name. The cold dread that follows makes your blood run icy. No, not this.

“I’ve invited Logan here to assist with his combat knowledge and mission expertise. I will be using Cerebro to locate survivors and pinpoint their location. I need everyone to stay alert and train accordingly.”

Logan’s expression darkens as he grumbles, “You really think this is gonna be easy? I’ve seen what these guys can do. We need to be ready for anything.”

“Which is exactly why we’re putting together a team. And you will be training them all. Thank you again for volunteering,” Charles responds.

Logan’s frustration is palpable as he mutters a curse under his breath and abruptly exits the room, slamming the door behind him. His departure leaves an uneasy silence in his wake.

The conversation among the remaining team members and Charles continues for a few more minutes. You look down at your hands, feeling the weight of dread settle in. The thought of facing those from your past—people who are still operating, still victimizing others—makes your chest tighten. This mission isn’t just about justice; it’s about confronting your own demons.

Charles eventually dismisses everyone with a warm gesture. “I don’t wish to keep any of you longer than necessary. Go and enjoy your evening. Wonderful job today, everyone.”

As the team begins to file out, you head toward the door, only to be stopped by Logan’s abrupt, gruff voice. “Hey,” he calls, his tone demanding attention. “Got a minute?”

Startled by his sudden approach and the harshness in his voice, you hesitate. “Um, sure. It’s Logan, right? What’s up?”

Without waiting for a more formal invitation, he motions for you to follow him to a quieter part of the hallway. His steps are purposeful, almost impatient, as he leads you away from the main area.

Once in a more secluded corner, he leans against the wall, crossing his arms in a way that highlights his imposing, muscular build. His eyes lock onto yours with a challenging glint.

“Listen,” he begins, his tone direct and uncompromising, “I don’t know you well, but when Chuck started talking about this mission, you looked like you were about to crumble. If you’re not serious about this, don’t bother. I don’t need anyone who can’t pull their weight.”

His blunt words sting, and you bristle at his assessment. It’s clear he doesn’t mince words, especially when it comes to evaluating his teammates.

“I was just processing everything,” you reply, trying to keep your voice steady. “It’s a lot to take in, especially since it’s my first mission. I don’t usually do missions.”

Logan’s eyes narrow, scrutinizing your response. “Processing is fine, but if you’re going to be part of this team, you need to be ready. I don’t want anyone getting hurt because they weren’t prepared.”

His harshness is tempered by a hint of something—perhaps a begrudging respect or concern. You meet his gaze with determination. “I understand. I’ll do my best to catch up and be ready. I won’t hold you back.”

Logan gives a curt nod, his mouth twisting into a snarky smirk. “Yea, sure, bub.”

With that, he pushes off the wall and heads down the hallway, his heavy boots echoing in the corridor. The encounter leaves you feeling a mix of apprehension and resolve. Despite his gruff demeanor, it’s clear that you need to prove yourself. And his harshness, while tough to take, has lit a fire under you.

“It’s (f/n),” you call after him, but he doesn’t acknowledge your correction.

As Logan disappears around the corner, you take a deep breath, bracing yourself for the challenges ahead. You know you need to face this mission head-on—not just for the sake of the team, but to confront your own past and the scars it has left behind. The path won’t be easy, but you’re determined to prove yourself, no matter how hard it gets.

But first a drink.

[spacebaby1]

fathers day at the Gojos

Slamming your alarm as soon as it rang you yawned carefully getting up. It's way too early to be up but since its father's day, you decided to do something special for Satoru. He on the other hand was fast asleep quietly snoring. Tiptoeing your way out of the room you headed towards the kitchen after freshening up. As you reached the last stairs you could clearly hear whispers and sound coming from your kitchen. Freezing in your place as your heart beating fast. Then you heard a little "ouch!" Yuji?

You hurried your way into the kitchen and found your two boys Yuji and Yuta standing next to the stove. They both froze when they saw you, "what are you two doing up this early?" You asked keeping your voice low, the kitchen was a bit of a mess. "Baking?" Yuta smiled nervously.

"For dad" Yuji said before coming around the counter to hug you, "morning ma." You smiled and Yuta joined you, "Good morning, Mama." You smiled hugging them both, "Morning loves. But it's way too early and you could've woken your dad with the noises, wait why are you-"

Yuji spoke before you could finish the question, "for father's day, duh. We tried to make a cake but we don't know if it's done and we've been trying to make pancakes but we don't know how, right yu?"

Yuta nodded rubbing his head, "we tried to look it up on the Internet but we couldn't figure out which one to pick and we don't know how to turn the stove on."

You sighed internally crying, "Don't worry I'll help you two, I was planning to make pancakes anyway. Come on help me grab few things from the pantry." Both your boys followed behind you.

After showing them how to make the batter and teaching them step by step on how to make the perfect pancakes as they both stood on either side of yours with shocked looks on their faces, it's fascinating to be a boy mom you thought as this was their first time learning anything cooking related you weren't aware that your boys were interested in making pancakes. "Come on now set the table and we will wake dad-"

Satoru walked into the kitchen, half asleep, "it smells like pancakes here." The three of you turned to look at him, and he noticed the cake on the table, his eyes widened, "I HAVEN'T FORGOTTEN ANY OF YOUR BIRTHDAYS HAVE I?" He panicked. Both your boys ran to hug him, "Happy fathers Day, dad!" They both said, and Satoru sighed, then laughed, "Aww, thank you. Did you'll baked a cake for me?" He asked, ruffling their hair. Both Yuji and Yuta nodded, "and mom helped us to make pancakes!" Yuta said happily as you placed the plate on the table, letting out a small chuckle as the three of your boys made it to the table. Satoru hugged you, "Happy fathers Day, babe. You're the best dad in the whole world. " You kissed his forehead, and he let out a lovely sigh. "Thank you, darling, I love you and my boys!" He let go of you and ruffled his boys hair one last time before taking his seat on the table.

[distuff]

Floating in The Blue Lagoon

. . .

. . .

Summary: Another day stuck in this world, another shady job from Crowley to Yuu, this time surrounding the aware, eerie Octavinelle. What can possibly go wrong?

Inspiration: The new tweels cards- Come on nOw

Side note: Between me and u, I was first going w the faceless first POV Yuu so everyone could imagine whatever. But then I saw M Yuu fanarts and I was like fck... another fandom where I imply gay rel!! 🤧

...

"Thank you soo much dear!" The familiar nasal voice spoke behind Yuu as the tall man nudged him toward his office door. "You're such a treasure for doing this, truly!"

"M-Matte-" Yuu began to protest, but before he could say more, Crowley pushed him out, Grim swaying in his arms with the mysterious box Crowley had trusted into his paws moments ago.

He spun around, hoping to be fast enough to stop the door from closing - even considering sacrificing Grim by throwing him like a Pokémon at the madman in the crow mask.

Yet before Yuu could do just that, Crowley was already giving them a wide grin, bidding them, Au revoir~ , and, Good luck, with a little wave before shutting the door in their stunned faces.

The sound of the door closing echoed through the empty hallway in the upper tower, leaving Yuu and Grim blankly staring at the bold golden letters spelling 'The Greatest Headmaster' on the dark wood.

They both blinked, bewilderedly, as the reality of their newly assigned 'homework' fully sunk in, making them soon grimace in annoyance.

'Maybe if I wish hard enough the chicken will combust into crispy KFC.' Yuu thought, glancing briefly at Grim in his arms once he spoke up.

"Soo..." Grim trailed off, his piercing blues peered up at Yuu, who kept glaring at the door. "Are we doing this or-"

Before he could finish, Yuu cut him off with a flat voice, "You think we can pass the RWA entrance exam?"

Silenced followed his 'question' until Grim spoke again, his voice resigned. "We are doing this."

Not a question, but a statement that simply stated the fact of the matter. Feeling there was no need to verbally confirm and make the situation that much more annoying, Yuu simply nodded with a blank face.

Choosing not to comment on Grim's swishing tail or how the Hades flames raised just so from his ears as he huffed and grumbled, the soft noise of sharp claws damaging a tough surface sounded through the halls right after.

Seeing no sense in standing around and prolonging the inevitable, Yuu let out a long sigh. Turning to leave, he fully accepted that instead of proper sleep, they'd return to their dorm around one AM.

'If luck enables us that is.' He grumbled internally, 'Should probably avoid Vil for two days…' Even the mental image of Pomefiore's house warden seeing his panda eyes brought chills down his spine.

And don't let him start on Riddle. Ugh...

Yuu trailed off with his thoughts to the potential scenarios they could experience if not careful in avoiding certain house wardens, not minding the feeling of Grim's tail encircling his hand as the grey furball continued throwing foreign words under his breath.

A slightly twisted thought crossed Yuu's mind - how bad would it be to let Grim unleash his irritation on the headmaster? But before the bitter seed could flourish into a poisons flower, Yuu quickly shook his head.

'This world is getting to me the longer I stay.' He mused. Part of hin started to feel comfortable in this magical world they were thrown into, and yet...the other part still longed to return to the warmth of his home.

Truly...Yuu truly didn't know what was the thought process when he oh so optimistically thought that, hey! I have friends, right? Me and Grim don't need to share this 'experience' alone.

Attempt NO 1,

6-Happy brain cells

- Heey guys!! Ik its late but do u wanna go w me and grim to Mostro lounge?? (10:45 PM 1)

Doll: Sure when?? (10:50 PM 1)

Doll: Who TF changed my fcking name again!? (10:50 PM 1)

Deunce: It suits you... (10:53 PM 1)

Aceless: "Sure when" Are u 4-real?? Like hell I'm goin back to that hell hole (10:53 PM 1)

Doll: aight' (10:54 PM 1)

Doll: It's a date then @ Yo-Yo (10:54 PM 1)

Aceless: Objection???? (10:54 PM 1)

Deunce: I second that (10:55 PM 1)

Doll: State the time pls (10:55 PM 1)

Aceless: Dont ignore me u lil purple haired troll! (10:57 PM 1)

Aceless: U forgot that we are a group?? If one doesn't go neither does others capiche?? (10:57 PM 1)

Doll: Aight' (10:57 PM 1)

Aceless: Aight' tf u mean 'aight' (10:57 PM 1)

- Doll removed Aceless from 6-Happy brain cells -

Doll: Deuce? (10:58 PM 1)

Doll: Do you agree with the exiled dud philosophy? (10:58 PM 1)

Deunce: ᕕ( ᐛ )ᕗ (10:59 PM 1)

Doll: Good 🍵 (10:59 PM 1)

Doll: @ Yo-Yo ?? (10:59 PM 1)

- Ah yes! Gomme gomme (シ_ _)シ (11:01 PM 1)

- Was getting the wooden boat out of the shed (11:01 PM 1)

Doll: Why? (11:01 PM 1)

Deunce: Why... (11:01 PM 1)

- ...why did u remove Ace?? (11:02 PM 1)

Doll: Why are U gettin a boat at 11 PM?? (11:02 PM 1)

- I asked whether u wanted to go to Mostro lounge (11:02 PM 1)

- Me and grim have to deliver a strange box to Azul and the Octavinelle's members in the lounge said he already gone back to the dorms so boat it is! (11:03 PM 1)

- Guys?? (11:05 PM 1)

- @ Doll?? (11:07 PM 1)

Attempt NO 2,

24/6 at Ruggies

- Is anyone free?? (11:09 PM 1)

Trey: And what are you doing up at this hour? (11:15 PM 1)

- Shouldn't I be asking you that with the whole rule number who knows which and ur bedtime? (11:15 PM 1)

Trey: Touché. (11:15 PM 1)

Trey: It's Sunday btw. (11:15 PM 1)

- Sht- I forgot (11:16 PM 1)

Idia: Ortho is asking why are u snooping behind the lounge @ Yuu (11:17 PM 1)

- Tell Ortho to mind his own business (11:17 PM 1)

Trey: Uuh...snappy 🍿(11:17 PM 1)

- 🚿🚿🚿 (11:17 PM 1)

Idia: Ortho is saying "You became our business the millisecond you prove yourself to be a valuable component in the system" (11:18 PM 1)

Before Yuu could follow up with a replay that would ask the Ignihyde brothers to come down and help them, the bold letter spelling 'Chat restricted until 10 AM, tomorrow' flashed over the screen.

'Fair.' Yuu thought.

Attempt NO3, aka the last resort, shows just how desperate he was at this point and regretted the second after sending the message to them.

Die Schönheit und die Süßen

- So... (11:20 PM 1)

- Anyone up? (11:20 PM 1)

For a hot second, Yuu thought no one would thankfully respond, but alas, that ping made his heart stop, and the message made his body tensed up.

Vil S.: What in the seven are YOU doing up at 11PM!? (11:21 PM 1)

- What are YOU doin up at 11PM?! (11:21 PM 1)

The three dots were far more threatening than they should have been, and Rook with Epel sending gravestones emoji did not help one bit. Yuu saw only one way out.

Without a second thought, Yuu left the group chat. There was no need to try to ask the group for the house warden only; Yuu wasted no time in leaving his phone on the shore with his blazer, putting his focus on helping Grim push the boat into the calm waters before jumping in.

"We are indebted to you they said. We'll support you when needed, they said," Yuu grumbled, rowing in sync with Grim, who stood on shaking paws before him. "Bullshit!" He threw his hands up in frustration - unaware his sharp movement made Grim wobble a bit before he glared at him.

With just the two of them, they started paddling across the lake nestled behind the lounge, the cursed box safely placed on the seat between them.

.

The oars fell with a heavy thud on the side of the boat, thankfully secured by the iron rod. His attention was more on the wildlife startled by his outburst. Frogs jumped into the water, and wings flapping filled the air, drawing Yuu and Grim to turn in the direction.

Familiar pink and blue flamingos were taking off and landing further away from the rowdy noise.

"Aren't those..." Grim began, pointing at the grooming flamingos in the distance. "Aren't those the ones Riddle is lookin' for?"

Yuu's eyes widened; knowing the implications of finding the lost Heartslabyul pigeons, he whirled his head towards Grim. "We didn't see anything, got it?"

Grim nodded vigorously, grabbing their individual oars they resumed rowing towards the lagoon that was getting closer much faster than before.

Once the flamingos were covered by the lake flora, they started to slow down, muscles starting to strain from the unplanned evening exercise.

"What do ya think is in it?" Grim asked, nodding at the box. His paddling may have slowed down, but by the strained expression, he refused to stop trying to help.

Unable to help it, Yuu gave his friend a small smile, knowing if he were to voice his appreciation, Grim would grumble and stop altogether, 'Stupid tsundere.' He thought, shrugging at his friend's question.

"Don't. know." Yuu grunted out each word, having to put more strength into his paddling, "Documents, money, dismembered body-"

"What?"

"What?" Yuu repeated, meeting Grim's wide-eyed stare. They both paused, silently eyeing each other for two different reasons.

Grim looked him up and down, his eyes settling on Yuu's gaze, narrowing suspiciously into slits. "You had a tea party with that old geezer," he growled, showing his small pointy teeth.

If this was past Yuu, he would have backed away and maybe fallen into the deadly yet enchanting water, but the present Yuu knew the reason behind Grim's irritation.

So, to spare some of his friend's feelings, Yuu discreetly turned his gaze to the side, mumbling, Maybe...

That, however, had the opposite effect. "And what did I say about that?!" Grim cried out, throwing his little paws up into the air with the oars dropping by his side.

Yuu hung his head, sighing at the familiar dance. "Not to go?" He replied in an even voice.

"And what did you do?" Grim asked back with an annoyed voice.

Prompting Yuu to look up, noting how his friend was now standing in the middle seat, closer to him. "Hey, now!" He shot back with furrowed brows, "I'm not going to limit myself just cause you're jealous!"

Grim gasped theatrically, a paw over his heart with wide blues gazing at him in horror before they narrowed in anger. "Am not!" His screech sent the remaining wildlife scattering with the sound of splashing and ruffling feathers.

Ignoring the commotion, Yuu playfully smirked, leaning on his palm, gazing mockingly at Grim's priceless reaction. "Oh, you so are." He moved his head left and right, leaning close with a sharp smile.

Their expressions mirrored each other, both showing their own set of teeth in a laughable display of dominance. However, it was just a matter of time before Grim would- Heh.

Yuu watched fondly as Grim averted his large eyes, huffing and crossing his paws. "I thought we were a team!" Grim said, bordering on whining, "A duo!"

He won't lie; his heart almost melted when Grim turned, his blues shining with feigned hurt that still made his eyes glitter. 'Stupid cat charm.' Yuu thought, biting his bottom lip to resist falling for Grim's antics as he continued dramatically,

"Where I go, you go, and where you go, you take me with you!"

Alright, the charm was broken, freeing Yuu to groan into his hands, his whining muffled. "But Lilia's teacakes are soo tempting~"

Something shifted in the air, making Yuu raise his head, only to meet Grim's disgusted expression as he tried leaning as far away as possible.

"We can't be that poor..." Grim muttered, making Yuu wince at his friend, offering him a wobbly smile.

"It's not so bad..." He said, trying to ignore the judgmental look he was getting, adding almost desperately, "It's just...he has a bitter taste.

Yuu kept up his awkward smile, partly focusing on the lulling rocking of their boat before Grim's sour expression caught his attention. "You're disgusting."

Blowing strands of hair from his eyes, Yuu was quick to retort back. "And you're just salty."

In a blink of an eye Grim was nose-to-nose with him, growling, Am not.

Yuu pressed back, eyes blazing. " You. Are." He emphasised. " It annoys you that Lilia doesn't invite you because you're hairy!"

The response was immediate as Grim recoiled back with an offended gasp. "How dare you! It's not my fault that geezer's allergic to my greatness!"

Feeling a surge of fondness, Yuu was unable to help but reach forward to boop Grim's nose, which scrunched up in response. "More like your-!"

Yuu felt his eyes widen together with Grim's, neither expecting the music that suddenly started filling the air. Both he and Grim turned cautiously to the side, trying to pinpoint how music could be playing in a middle of a fucking lake.

With their cheeks pressed together, they instinctually reached to embrace the other, watching in reality shuttering disbelief as five frogs appeared at the edge of their boat, jerking back when the frogs began singing along to the melody.

You and Grim exchanged a glance, but before they could voice the question of their sanity or check the lake's toxicity level, something started pushing their boat towards the lagoon hidden within the willow trees.

Shocked by the unfolding events, neither of them had the time to process as two seagulls pulled back the long branches, letting them into the lagoon - too entrance to notice the subtle harsh nudge to their boat.

They could only gape more at the number of animals joining in, with the music intensifying and the boat getting gently turned in the water.

The singing grew louder with the music while fireflies started to illuminate the space inside, making the water seem like a starry night outside.

"Sha-la-la-la, let the music play, do what the music says. You gotta kiss the- gwak! "

The sharp noise of something shooting from the water cut through the un-natural concert, snatching one of the seagulls mid-flight. The bird let out a distress cry before being dragged into the depths, all in the span of a second.

Frozen in shock, silence fell over the lagoon, everyone staring at the spot where the seagull had disappeared. Yuu barely had time to blink before the chaos erupted.

Water splashed, feathers ruffled, and leaves rustled. Yuu and Grim stood rigid as the previous silence returned, thick with tension.

Without hesitation, they embraced each other, holding on tightly. When no sound entered their space beside their breathing, Yuu thought in passing how the lagoon would seem enchanting if they hadn't just witnessed a murder.

He restrained himself from glancing at the spot, which Yuu could only assume would be a red mixed with rich blue by now. Instead, Yuu willed his wide eyes to move around, searching for any sign of danger as their boat slowly rocked in place.

"We are not getting paid enough for this!" Grim cried out, his twitching whiskers tickling Yuu's cheek as the cat spoke, his words echoing in the quiet space.

Tightening his hold on Grim, Yuu cried out next. "I can't go down for a shitty box!"

As a response, both of them stilled when they felt something heavy bump into their boat, rocking it harder. Yuu swiftly covered Grim's mouth as the cat prepared to screech in fear, hoping to avoid drawing attention from whatever lurked beneath the surface any further.

With bated breaths, Yuu bit his bottom lip as Grim's claws dug into his skin. 'I just clipped them!' Was his last train of thought before his mind went blank.

Yuu's heartbeat thundered in his ears, the rapid rhythm a stark contrast to the ominous silence that filled the lagoon. The boat hadd ceased its unsettling rotations, coming to an eerie stop.

His breath, shallow and rapid, stirred Grim's fur, the soft rumble of the feline's growls offering the only semblance of comfort.

Grim unconsciously leaned further into his chest, large blues sharpening into slits with his fur rising in alert as his forked-tail swished back and forth.

Splash. Two sets of eyes snapped to the rippling water, both braced for what was to come when-

"Heya!"

Yuu screamed, a high-pitched, girlish sound that echoed through the still air. The familiar boyish voice behind him and the cold, clammy hand on his shoulder sent a jolt of terror though his body.

In his panic, Yuu jerked away, inadvertently tossing Grim into the air right as he was yanked back into a slimy, wet chest, his shirt absorbing the icy droplets that clung to the perpetrator's skin.

"Grim!" Yuu shouted, his voice thick with horror as he watched his yowling friend tumble through the air.

For a fleeting moment, he twistedly hoped that a hungry seagull would snatch Grim, mistaking the cat for a sardine. Anything was better than what- who was lurking in the lake's depths.

But such hope was snapped the instant Grim hit the water with a resounding splash, plunging the lagoon back into an uneasy silence.

Yuu's mind raced as he stared at the spot where Grim had vanished. He was too distracted to notice the two webbed cyan hands creeping over his chest - the now see-through shirt thoroughly drenched.

Only when he wanted to instinctually move towards the edge of the boat to check the surface did Yuu quickly realise he couldn't move a muscle.

The grip was firm yet deceptively gentle, with cold fingers pressing against his skin, sending a chill down his spine as they began to squeeze just so. The sharp nails dug in just enough to threaten without breaking the skin.

Yuu tensed when hot breath tickled his ear, sharp teeth grazing his earlobe, making him shudder involuntarily as blood flowed to his ears - no doubt taunting the predator with the promise of live prey.

His breath hitched as the grip on his chest tightened, a possessive hold that made it hard to breathe as he spoke in a low voice, making his heartbeat quickened.

"Shrimpy~"

The nickname was unmistakable, uttered with a boyish tone laced with a dangerous edge. There was no questioning which Leech twin had ensnared him.

"F-Floyd." Yuu stammered, his voice trembling as he forced out the name, a shaky smile plastered on his face.

His pulse pounded underneath his skin as Floyd's grip tightened, pulling him closer against the merfolk's cold, smooth chest. The wet fabric of his button-up clung to his skin uncomfortably, but he knew better than to squirm or complain by now.

Any sign of resistance would only aggravate the eel that had meticulously twisted around its prey. Not yet intending to harm only to play.

Floyd's chest vibrated against Yuu's back, a low rumble that sent a shiver down his spine. "You should know by now ya can't just come here uninvited," Floyd murmured, his voice carrying a subtle threat that made Yuu's breath hitch.

He opened his mouth, fully indenting to explain their nightly visit, but the words on the tip of his tongue were swallowed down as Floyd's nose brushed against the side of his neck.

Familiar tingly of electricity travelled from his neck down to his fingertips. The merfolk's breath was hot against his skin, and Yuu had to fight the urge not to flinch away. Any movement, any sign of weakness, would only provoke Floyd further.

Instead, he tried putting the focus on more pressing matters as the merfolk started to move Yuu backwards little by little, where he had to dig his hands into the wood underneath him to prevent Floyd from pulling him into the cold waters.

"Could you- I don't know, could you maybe go down and...you know," Yuu's voice faltered as Floyd paused to study him, his heterochromatic eyes unredable with his right faintly glowing within the dimmed lagoon.

Yuu forced a nervous chuckle, his eyes darting around as he tried to avoid Floyd's gaze. "Go down and get him?" Yuu suggested weakly, quickly adding, for a price of course! with a strained smile when he saw Floyd's unchanged expression, webbed ears twitching in clear irritation with his hold tightening just so.

Their eyes locked in a silent exchange, an unspoken conversation that sent a shiver down Yuu's spine. He watched, heart pounding, as Floyd's hands slowly slid down his arms to the edge of the boat.

The eel merfolk used it to lift himself up until he was looming over him. Sharp fins flaring in a clear challenge with dual eyes locked with his flittering gaze.

Droplets of water landed on Yuu's face, cold and startling, but instead of listening to the alarms in his head to look away and accept defeat, he squared his shoulders, his gaze hardening with determination.

Floyd leaned closer, a soft growl escaping his throat, revealing a razor-sharp canine poking from his lips. A gesture meant to threaten, to send fear through the body, freezing it in place. And yet...

Yuu knew all too well that if Floyd wanted to, he could easily flip the boat and trap him in the dark, cold depths of his domain, where he was rendered useless more than he already was on land.

But Yuu had spent enough time with the moody twin to understand his twisted sense of 'fun'. He didn't flinch as he watched the golden eye seemingly gleam even more. He didn't let his heart's frantic rhythm distract him when Floyd's longer strand of hair tickled his cheek.

He held his ground, calmly staring into Floyd's golden eye, not paying much attention to how the eel's body slid into the boat, inch by inch.

In that tense moment, Yuu could only prey that Grim's lazy brain had paid some attention during Mr Vargas's lessons on holding one's breath underwater.

Either that, or Yuu would have to find a way to win in Floyd's game without losing a limb, or-

A sharp splash of water and a loud gasp shattered whatever bubble Yuu was willingly drowning in. Both he and Floyd snapped their attention forward just as his vision was suddenly obscured by a ball of grey fur.

Grim, shaking more from fear than cold, clung to Yuu's face, his little heart pounding against his forehead. Yuu groaned, prying the terrified creature off his face, all while ignoring the irritated tut behind him.

He was about to ask Grim whether they would have to sneak into the collages infirmary again when his attention was stolen by the second twin, who Yuu notated was already half way in their boat.

Jade's smile feigned charm, which was nothing if not sadistic, with heterochromatic eyes glinting with amusement as he moved closer, using the middle plank which Yuu was sitting on to prop himself up.

Grim, still shivering, clung to Yuu's now drenched shirt, the fabric clinging to his ski nearly see-through, with the realisation settling in that they were now trapped between the two merfolk.

Yuu could do nothing but wait for either of them to speak as he was the one intruding on their territory with his heart hammering against his chest. 'If only the ghosts in Ramshackle were this territorial.' Yuu thought, desperately trying to keep his wits about him.

Jade tilted his head to the left, his eyes scanning them as they were once more clutching the other, the left eye glowing eerily, deepening the melted gold.

"Well, if it isn't the little Prefect..." Jade's voice was smooth, almost calming to the situation, served as a further threat by the way his sharp teeth peeked through his empty smile. "May I inquire as to your reason for being here?"

Yuu was more than aware of the strict policy every dorm oblige to. Every having their own set of rules and habits with only one being shared between them. The Entry policy.

Unless a member of said dorm or invited by the housewarden personally a student could only get in if send by the principle. Which Yuu was, naively thinking would be taken care of by said chicken!

Feeling his brows furrow, Yuu was quickly reminded of his current predicament when he felt Floyd move behind him, a large hand reaching over to grab Grim, who immediately started squirming and protesting about, how dare you treat the great Grim like a rat!

Yuu's mind provided an image of a trashing Grim facing a grumpy-looking Floyd who dangled him in the air like a wet socks.

He bit his tongue, knowing all too well what would follow if he were to turn around in a fruitless attempt to help. Instead, Yuu stayed still, his eyes never trailing away from Jade's inquisitive ones.

Taking a deep breath, Yuu nodded towards the box that was now underneath Jade. "Sir Crowley tasked me- us. Tasked us with delivering this to Azul," he explained, trying to stay calm despite the snickers and hisses behind him and the feeling of another body sliding closer to his right

The way Jade looked down and Floyd stopped tormenting Grim to peer over his shoulder in almost puppy-like curiosity helped Yuu ease up some of his nerves. Yet it never fully lost its guard, which heightened once more when the silence that followed was heavy.

Even Grim seemed to sense the unease in the air when he stopped trashing in Floyd's hold. Not being able to stay silent no more, Yuu quickly added in a dire attempt to smooth over the tension.

Not noticing how both eels' spins flared, eyes narrowed, and their webbed ears flattened or ruffled, he started spouting elaboration.

"I would have left it at the lounge, but he said Azul asked for it to be delivered immediately! I thought he sent notice to you guys before I-"

But before he could finish, the boat suddenly flipped over. The realisation of what had happened came too late, and Yuu found himself plunged into the cold water with a mouthful of it before he could have a chance to react accordingly.

With blurry vision and pounding hear, Yuu's other senses heightened almost immediately where he jerked away from the feeling of the familiar smooth muscles gliding over his back.

The sensation had prompted Yuu to shook off the shock and quiclky swam upwards, partly noting the smooth muscle of one of the twins tails ssliding under his feet.

Being in no position to think whether it was meant to help or strain him more, his sole focus was on the faster approaching surface.

Gasping for air as he broke the surface, Yuu pushed his wet hair out of his eyes, only to feel a cold present settle behind him with tail coiled around his feet, immobilising him and forcing him to sit on the powerful muscle.

"Our apologies, we didn't account for the heaviness of this form. I hope you can forgive us, Mr Prefect." Jade's smooth voice sounded behind him, his hands easily sliding over Yuu's arms, settling under his palms with a deceptive gentleness.

Blaming the cold water for his tremble, Yuu fight to ignore the soft electric feeling under his palm, opting to glance over his shoulder and narrowing his eyes at Jade's insincere smile.

"Oh, I'm sure you both feel so guilty," Yuu glowered, voice dripping with sarcasm. "Why did you push it over?"

Jade blinked at him 'innocently', but before Yuu could press for an answer, the sound of cackle behind him followed by something slimy brushing against his exposed arm, drew his attention to Floyd, who was now lazily circling them in the water, with shivering Grim on his chest as the twin leisurely yet roughly patted him.

Yuu winced in sympathy at the ministration, his eyes widening when Floyd's hand emerged from the water, the silver box in his hand as the twin rattled it with a mischievous grin.

"Lookie, Jade!" Floyd called out to his brother, who in turn smiled knowingly at his twin. "It's that."

Floyd stopped before them, ignoring how Grim cringed in his hold with his body partly submerged under the water. 'At least I won't have to bathe your stinky arse.' Yuu thought, refocusing on the question he and Grim wondered about before.

"What's in that box?" Yuu asked, nodding at the silver box in Floyd's possession. Yet, instead of answering, the twins exchanged a glance before focusing all their attention on him.

Yuu instinctively retreaded a bit, unintentionally pressing closer to Jade, who tightened his tail around Yuu's legs in response.

A gesture that could be either threatening or comforting settled at the back of his mind when he fought the shiver induced by Jade's low voice near his reddening ear.

"If you're so curious..." He began smoothly as Floyd swam closer with Grim tightly pressed against his chest, rendering the creature speechless as Floyd mimicked his twin's looming presence.

"Why not come down with us?" Floyd finished with a boyish voice. Both brothers peered down at Yuu who felt the tip of Floyd's tail effortlessly take off his shoes with both the twins working down the buttons of his blouse to-

"N-No, we good! But thanks for the offer, truly!" Yuu stammered, his smaller human hands pushing theirs away, no doubt letting him to; otherwise, Yuu was hundred percent sure he and Grim would already be dragged into the water half way on their way to the Octavinelle dorm.

The twins exchanged another look, Jade had his usual calm expression while Floyd was clearly dissatisfied with his rejection of their proposal.

What followed next was a bunch of chatter sounds where mostly Floyd was showing his annoyance through soft glowers with his sharp spine fin occasionally flexing.

But whatever they were discussing in their own language that Yuu couldn't even phantom to decipher, it was clearly affecting Jade as well as his tail tightened more than once around his legs where Yuu started to stop feeling his feet.

Thankfully, the brothers cleared their disagreement pretty fast, with Jade turning to him with a tight smile and Floyd huffing, letting go of Grim as he crossed his arms with the box in his left hand, enabling Grim to quickly try paddling to Yuu only to be caught by the ever smiling Jade.

"Very well then," Jade said, his golden eye glowing briefly as he began to unwarp his long tail from around Yuu's legs. Thinking he was being let go, he got ready to start kicking his stocking feet that would otherwise make him grimace if all his clothes were not wet as well.

You could only internally groan at the prospect of laundry once he and Grim returned to their dorm, which sounded heavenly right now.

But instead of the freedom he hoped he was granted, Yuu found himself being pulled into a suffocating embrace. Floyd grinned in satisfaction with one glance at Jade telling him this was planned.

With a stretched smile, Jade continued. "It wouldn't do you good to swim all the way to shore. Please, let us escort you Mr Prefect." A command that was poorly disguised as a question.

'It wouldn't do me good to swim with you two either!' He wanted to say out loud, but instead, he let his eyes fall on something behind the ever-patient Jade.

Yuu paid no mind to Floyd's hands slipping around him, the eel nuzzling into his neck once more, sending waves of soft electricity down his arms and leaving iron taste in his mouth.

Glancing between the flipped boat and Jade with large, hopeful eyes, Yuu pointed at it with a wobbly smile. "Eh..You could just turn it around-!"

He should have expected it Jade's respond, truly, it was his fault.

Before Yuu could finish his suggestion, Jade, without turning around, brought his powerful tail down, smashing the boat into pieces with a single blow. THe sharp sound echoed in the quiet lagoon, the silence only broken by Jade's silver voice.

"You were saying?" He asked 'innocently' with a tilted head.

Making a quick eye contact with Grim who froze in Jade's hold, thankfully unharmed from the flying pieces of wood. Yuu knew it was either yes and a gentle ride home with a clingy leech or no and a forced ride back to shore with water entering his nose-

"I was saying that I'd be grateful for your assistance." Yuu replied with a strained smile, which Jade returned with a much more charming one while Floyd let out a short huff.

As if all the patience Floyd had to stay silent through their back and forth was finally all used up, the merfolk submerged underwater before Yuu had the chance to see his expression.

His tail slid under Yuu's legs before disappearing entirely. Unsure of what Floyd was planning, Yuu looked to Jade for answers, but the other twin only smiled back, moving forward and smoothly sliding into the water as he let Grim walk over his shoulder onto his back, continuing onwards.

Yuu didn't know what to say or do as he watched the Leech brother getting farther away, sharing a confused look with Grim Yuu sighed. Seeing no other reason for Floyd's disappearance other than boredom, he was not surprised by the eel's whimsical nature.

With no other choice left, Yuu started to follow Jade who was already a good distance away from him, his drenched clothes not making the swimming any easier.

"Stupid chicken with his stupid tasks and his stingy-!" Grumbling under his breath without choking on the water, he was suddenly pushed upwards by a strong and refine muscle which moved him faster forward.

With legs on both sides of what was moving under him, Yuu blinked away his short-lived surprise. It didn't take a genius to understand that he was sitting on Floyd's waist who flashed him a crooked grin, with hands behind his head, as his powerful tail pushed them forward.

"Were ya thinkin' of swimming away from me, Shrimpy?" Floyd teased, his voice playful, clearly waiting for his response.

Yuu let out a tired sigh, his expression softening into a reluctant smile. "How could I when you would clearly catch me no matter what." Yuu replied, hand curiously spreading on Floyd's smooth, cyan-white skin, which shimmered under the moon's light.

The merfolk rumbled in response, the vibration travelling through Yuu's fingertips as Floyd's annoyed tut finally drew his attention back to his face. Yuu only saw Floyd's furrowed brows just as webbed hands grasped his and pulled him closer.

Sprawled over Floyd, his nose barely brushing against Yuu's forehead. "Ya wouldn't make the chase boring though, right Shrimpy?" Floyd asked in a low voice, his other hand brushing Yuu's hair behind his ear, claws lightly grazing his sensitive skin, sending shivers down Yuu's spine. "I know you wouldn't, right?"

Yuu swallowed nervously, his wide eyes meeting Floyd's duals. The golden eye seemed to glow brighter under the open starry night. Knowing one wrong move or word could trigger a different mood with a different response where Yuu would either end up safely on the shore or drowned in the peaceful lake.

He couldn't help the relieved sighed when Jade's stern voice interrupted the charged air between them. "Floyd."

Floyd's gaze dropped, lazily meeting his twin's disapproving stare. "I thought you wanted him to enjoy the ride back in peace." Jade reminded him.

Yuu and Grim exchanged wary glanced, their eyes darting between the two Leech brothers, settling on Floyd's sharp grin which grew as he locked eyes with Jade.

Without another word, Floyd lowered his head on the water's surface, his teal hair fanning out as he swam just a little faster, ahead of his brother.

"Ya never asked for my definition of peace, now did ya." Floyd quipped cheekily. Jade easily let his twin have the last word, recognising that his brother's appetite for chaos was, for the moment, satiated.

Knowing what the other Leech brother did, Yuu waved his hand to gain Jade's attention, which the more composed twin immediately gave.

A brief but genuine smile crossed his lips as Yuu mouthed a silent, thank you. Jade nod in respond, redirecting his focus to the path ahead.

Determined to maintain the fragile peace, Yuu subtly motioned for Grim to stay quiet. The little feline rolled his eyes with a huff as he crossed his paws, but wordlessly complied. Not daring to challenge the Leech twins' unpredictable nature.

Satisfied, Yuu turned his attention forward, observing Floyd's unexpectedly peaceful expression. Here he was, sitting on a merfolk, a being capable of tearing him to pieces, snapping his bones as if made of porcelain.

Yet instead, Floyd had chosen to help with his brother. To protect, in their own twisted way.

'Even if you may be seen as morally grey, selfish, animalistic and twisted. I...' Yuu thought, his fingers absently tracing the smooth skin, barely feeling the hidden scales. 'I can't help but admire the authenticity of your actions.'

Be it the Leech twins, Azul or other students he met in NRC Yuu never felt he was being lied to. Tested or even secretly deceived. Hell! The trio never hid their scheming nature when they tried luring students into making deals.

'This place truly lives up to its name.' Heh. A bitter smile tugged at Yuu's lips when, instead of the expected fear, disgust or resentment, all he could feel was...peace.

Throughout their serene ride, Yuu couldn't help but return to the same old thought. Was this world changing him, or was he letting it change him?

How long until he would fully forget about returning back to his home, to his family and life? How long until he would stop fighting the pull and let himself drown in the murky waters.

Yuu felt his eyes dim with each question, hands fisting before he willed them to relax. He truly needed sleep.

.

The journey back to shore was much quicker with the twins' assistance than when he and Grim rowed on their own.

The moment they reached the dark-sandy beach encircling the lake, both Floyd and Jade swam as close as possible allowed them to, their massive forms gliding effortlessly though the water.

As soon as they hit the shallows, the brothers settled on the sand, allowing Yuu and Grim to slide down.

Wasting no time in staying longer than needed, Grim leapt from Jade's back, muttering a quick, Thanks! Just as Yuu drilled into him, scurrying to the safety of the shore, far from the water's edge.

Yet when it was his turn, he didn't get far. Choking on his thanks, Yuu stumbled forward with a jolt of fear travelling through him when a webbed hand clasped around his ankle, causing him to crash to the sand.

Heart pounding, Yuu instinctively braced himself for the fall, intending to turn and yell at Floyd. But before he could, the merfolk was already flipping him over with ease, his golden eye glinting with playful malice.

"Floyd, what the hell-" Yuu's words died in his throat as he saw the sharp, glinting teeth inching closer to his foot. His breath quickened, and a primal fear gripped him. He squeezed his eyes shut, bracing for the painful feeling of teeth tearing into flesh.

But instead of pain, he felt a strange, tickling sensation. Confused, Yuu slowly opened his eyes to find Floyd nibbling on his ankle, his sharp teeth grazing the skin without breaking it.

A familiar heavy feeling of guilt settled on his heart as he watched Floyd finish his ministration that was probably meant as a goodbye for him, tail softly thumbing behind the brother as he gave him a large grin, oblivious to what Yuu thought he would do.

'And right after I thought you shouldn't be seen as mindless monsters.' Guess old habits do die hard, Yuu thought solemnly. He is still not used to some of the 'cultural' differences between his world and theirs it seemed.

"Let's play like this again soon, alright?" Floyd's question interrupted Yuu's self-demeaning thoughts, his voice unusually soft, but with an undeniable edge to it.

His tail flicked water playfully onto the shore with Jade next to his twin, silently regarding Yuu with an unsettling intensity, his duals gleaming with an eagerness that could be seen as a predatory curiosity from a different angle.

"Please take care and get home safe, Mr Prefect." Jade said, his expression already washed down by his empty smile as he respectfully bowed his head while his twin nodded vigorously, his expression equally unreadable.

"Hai, hai! The land is far more dangerous than water anyways." Floyd followed, his usual playful demeanor fading into something more serious. "If ya get into trouble, don't hesitate to jump here."

"I'm sure we could make an...expectation for you if you're in dire danger." Jade added, slowly moving closer. Yuu's eyes shifted between the two twins, whichever spoke, noting that both were now looming over him on each side.

Yuu took into account their uncaring nature, reasoning no matter how long they lived ashore, they wouldn't care for something obvious like personal space.

"Azul might even allow you to stay in Octavinelle for a while too..." Floyd said next, bending so his duals with his gleaming gold would easily lock with Yuu's hesitant gaze that slowly melted into a more interested look.

"Indeed..."Jade followed next, mirroring his twin's posture as well as expression, "For a price, of course. But don't fret, it won't be too hefty, I promise you that our little Prefect."

Yuu felt the weight of their gazes, the two pools of melted gold gleamed with a mix of amusement and something more possessive.

He barely registred the feeling of their webbed hands - one gentle, the other more forceful - clasping his own, nor did he hear Grim's muffled panicked cries.

All Yuu could focus on was the two glowing golds and the subtle pressure of being pulled back towards the water when an arrow suddenly whizzed through the air, landing inched from Yuu's groin, easily pushing the two eels from him.

The shared shock between them broke whatever chain was encircling Yuu's neck, making all three turn their heads sharply in the direction the arrow that nearly castrated him had come from.

Yuu's breath hitched, the low sound of growls ignored as his brain settled on far greater danger than those two merfolks' that retreated further into the waters.

There in the distance, a familiar figure marched towards them with a scowling expression and scary speed, considering the heels that seemed sharper than usual.

The peaceful night was shattered. Without a second thought, Yuu scrambled to his feet, the adrenaline surging through his veins as his eyes locked with blazing amethysts; Grim's loud voice going ignored as he shouted, Rook!?

Yuu couldn't decipher whether it was from excitement or fear as his friend pointed up at the trees with heavy foliage, his attention solely on,

"V-Vil! What are you doing here at this fine hour?" Yuu stammered, his voice trembling slightly as the blond bore down on him. Vil seemed like a man on a mission, his dress robe adorned by fur fluttering behind him like a royal robe.

Seeing movement in his peripheral vision, Yuu quickly glanced to the side, seeing the two twins slowly sliding away from him before his focus was turned back due to the familiar scent of caramel apple engulfing his senses.

"Fine? Fine, you say," Vil's voice was low, dangerously calm, with an edge that sent chills down Yuu's spine that was not from the wind brushing against his drenched state.

Suddenly, the taller teen grabbed Yuu by the collar, yanking him closer, their faces mere inches apart. "Do you have any idea what time it is?" Vil demanded, his amethysts burning with a fury that Yuu felt only he was privileged to see from the 'perfect' male standing before him.

Yuu forced an awkward smile at his senior, raising his hands in surrender. Out of the corner of his eye, Yuu caught sight of Epel, panting heavily as he tried to catch his breath.

The lavender-haired boy who was bent over still found the strength to furiously shake his head with a paled expression, motioning with his thumb a cutting gesture over his neck.

But Yuu, despite knowing better, couldn't stop himself from speaking. "Somewhere around eleven-"

"Twelve. Thirty. AM." Vil's voice cut through the night like a blade, dripping with venom from the usually composed 'Queen' of Pomefiore.

Feeling the unusual statick in the air, Yuu willed himself to take a deep breath in, scanning Vil's flawless face that was adorned with faint lines of stress.

His heart sank at the thought that he was the cause of the blond's distress. Eyes softening, Yuu opened his mouth in an attempt to soothe the blond, but before he could say anything, Vil huffed a shaky smirk, speaking of Yuu's inevitable doom.

Too slow to react, Vil turned on his heel, tugging Yuu forward with surpsiing force. Tumbling over his stocking feet, Yuu tried to regain his balance, but Vil didn't give him the chance.

With a firm grip on the back of Yuu's drenched shirt, Vil marched forward, dragging him along the ground like a beat-up plushy that was about to get thoroughly washed.

The pompous 'Queen' whistled a short tune as they passed Epel, who had just caught his breath only to realise he had to go through all that again.

However, before he could ask his friend why he was even out here, his head snapped to familiar yowl of Grim. Scanning his around where he heard him, Yuu didn't had much time to pin point where he was as Vil's voice dragged his attention back to him.

"Going on some evening endeavour this late at night, leaving the chat and then daring not to answer any of the calls. I hope you know I expect you to sit obediently once we get back to Pomefiore and not make a peep while I try to save this disaster."

Vil looked over his shoulder, peering down at Yuu with amethysts that gleamed with the promise of punishment if defiance were to be noticed.

Feeling wronged for nothing, Yuu stupidly tried to explain his and Grim situation before Vil's tense voice easily cut through his voice. "Do you understand?"

Wide eyes searched the hardened violet gems before he let out a long sigh. Slumping his shoulders, Yuu replied with a short, aye, sir.

Clearly satisfied with his respond, Vil humped as he continued listing all that they would have to go through to ensure neither of them would get dark circles or dry skin once they woke up.

Hearing the torture they would have to go through, his eyes swiftly locked with Epel's wide ones, I expect full compensation the boy's gaze said which made Yuu promptly snap his attention at his only salvation.

Yet when his fearful eyes met two pairs of duals shining with sadistic mischiefs in the moonlit night, he found no solace - only the eerie, synchronised wave of the two merfolk, making Yuu rethink his previous thought before all this.

'I take it all back. All of you are sadistic bastards!'

---

Thank you all for reading! I hope ya enjoyed yourself. Pls don't be shy to comment any of Ur thoughs or leave a like. It was fun to write!

[muzzlemouths]

[CW: Death/implication of death]

The clock reads a quarter to midnight when Sun powers on. Too early. He isn’t meant to come online for another six hours, and the daycare itself won’t open for another hour after that. He promptly runs a scan to determine the reasoning behind his premature entrance and when it returns inconclusive he turns to Moon. It is his metaphorical toes he is stepping on by encroaching on the night as he is, after all.

It’s quiet. The kind of quiet that settles like dust. A quiet that makes one aware of the breath that stirs within their lungs or, in Sun’s case, the gentle whir of an internal fan that perpetually keeps his system from running itself into the ground. A quiet so frequently interrupted by the welcomed voice of his other half…and yet, nothing. His question goes unanswered, left to gather with the dust, and he is forced to proceed as though these strange happenings haven’t disrupted his entire morning routine.

A routine further disturbed upon having to remind himself for the second time already that it isn’t morning, he isn’t meant to be going through the start-up procedure to begin with, and he can’t be blamed for the corrupted sense of awareness he feels as a result. Sure, the lights are on, and his systems, too, return with normal results after a precautionary scan, but there is a discomfort to all of this scratching at the inner plating of his frame. Something is wrong wrong wrong.

“…Moon?”

His second attempt at communication yields no better results than the first, only a vague static answering the call, murmur-soft background noise, as though someone had plucked a phone from its receiver and then walked away. Frustrating is what it was. To ignore him was childish at best, but at worst, it was concerning. His relationship with Moon was reasonably amicable even on the longest of days, he worked better with Moon than without, so the absence was unusual as much as it was alarming.

Alone with his thoughts for the foreseeable future, Sun decides there is little point to sitting around in the midst of this confusion when he could be using the time to busy himself with more important tasks, such as tidying up all the apparent dust around here. Better yet, he can get a head-start in preparation for that day’s activities. Something to keep his mind from wandering into worrywart territory, at the very least.

An ache stemming at the tail of his exoskeleton twinges with particularly horrendous vengeance upon finally convincing his legs to move. He buries the vocalization of a wince and carries on across the carpeted room with little more than a brief mental note to mention the pain to a mechanic if it worsens by tomorrow. No use in wasting company time for what he’s sure is only the result of one or both of them landing wrong after receiving a hug from one of the daycare’s more excitable children (or several).

Still, it makes the process of retrieving a stray toy from the floor that much harder when he sees it lying in wait by the slide. If anything, bending down to reclaim the doll only exacerbates the ache until it grows into a proper sting, now difficult to ignore. Yet ignore it he does, to the best of his ability. There are things to do and he isn’t about to let a pinch of soreness slow him down now. No, sirree! He has play equipment to wipe down, craft supplies to ready, and–

and…

His hand stops just short of reaching the doll, long yellow fingers curling inward, against his palm which is painted with splotches of salt and pepper, as though a bottle of dully colored glitter glue had exploded across his fingers and hand. He straightens again and lifts his other hand, noting a similar stretch of television static, one that carries beyond his wrist up the length of his forearm in smeared blotches and specks like splattered paint in dirty snow hues.

Messy messy messy. What could Moon have gotten up to that resulted in such a mess? He’d have made a face, had he a nose to wrinkle in the first place.

Instead he allows for one small tut of disgust to escape his voice box before turning his attention back to the doll, taking note of the static that stains the carpet beside its head, and just beyond it, too; a trail made up of one scattered drop after another.

Ever curious, he knows not what to do besides follow it, hoping for an answer to the many questions burning through his system. Each continuous speck leads him in the direction of the exit, every patch of static more plentiful than the last, and as he allows the strange color to guide him forward he begins to question not only its existence, but why it all seems so familiar, as though he’s seen it somewhere before.

There is little time to mull it over. He arrives at the service desk where the trail ends abruptly, and Sun pauses with the toe of his slippers stood just an inch before a stray, black shoe that might have sent him stumbling face first into carpet had he not already been looking down. A shoe isn’t the most bizarre thing to lose in a daycare of all places, and he decides right away that it isn’t anything to worry over, just another item to drop into lost and found, but where there is a shoe there is bound to be someone missing it and, well…

Sun finds the answer he’s looking for just a few inches behind the service desk.

Face down and tucked in on themselves as they are, cloaked in the desk’s shadow, it’s impossible to tell anything about the person beyond their age, and even that is somewhat uncertain — though the size 9 shoe left behind offers a decent clue. This discovery does wonders to quell the anxiety in Sun’s chest. An adult was much easier to escort from the daycare, given the lack of parental contribution it necessitated, and it looked like this one was just sleeping! An odd place to go about it, sure — against the rules, most certainly — but it’s nothing that can’t be fixed with a purposeful tap to the ankle.

So, that’s exactly what he does. Bending dramatically at the knee, head swiveling to one side, Sun’s fingers dance as though he intends on tickling the trespasser awake before extending his index finger and tapping twice in quick succession against the exposed skin between their pant leg and sock. “Rise and shine, friend!” He chirps, “It’s time to head home now.”

He’d have preferred the tried-and-true method of rousing someone (that is, a gentle rock of the shoulders), but given that their guest was currently resting in the one area that Sun was not permitted entry to, he was forced to resort to more…creative measures. Unfortunately, this action does not yield the results he is hoping for.

“Friend?” Sun calls again, allowing his voice to raise a decibel from the polite mumble it had been before. The laughter that cuts from his voicebox is nervous and too loud on its own, his anxiety returning tenfold. The points of logic he had used to reassure himself before were now quickly dwindling with each passing second in which he received no response.

With his steps now admittedly growing frantic, Sun tiptoes around the desk to the other side, hoping for a better view of their comatose companion. What happens instead is an almost comical flailing of limbs as his slipper takes to an unseen puddle of static like it were a banana peel, resulting in a scramble to keep himself upright that only comes to an end when he braces against the nearest wall for support. The distraction is agitating, but short lived. A commotion like that would surely have awoken anyone, no matter how deep in slumber they were, and the continued lack of response does nothing to relieve Sun of the stress threatening to fry his circuits.

“Friend, this is n-no time for jokes!” He asserts, speaking at full volume, now, every word drenched in tense frustration. His gaze falls to the puddle of static soaking into the bottoms of his slippers, that twinge of recognition rearing its head once more. “I’m not in the mood for games, right now, so if you’re only pretending to sleep—” his hand comes away from the wall feeling wrong, the familiar sensation of sticky static blanketing his palm and crusting in the grooves between his joints as it further dries. His fingers curl into a loose fist long enough to observe the way each digit smears against his palm and leaves behind a tacky residue that he can feel, but not see.

He looks up. There, on the wall, two handprints interrupt the static. The first is larger, an obvious testament to the humbling misstep he’d only just finished recovering from, but the other…it was far smaller, surely left behind by the same stranger currently snoozing away beneath the desk, and it ran from the lightswitch down down down to the floor, where the accusing hand now rested just outside the desk’s shadow.

How strange, Sun thinks, tilting his head to get a better look. The way the static paints their skin, it almost looks like—

“You’re doing so well, dewdrop, just a moment longer and you’ll be right as rain again!” Sun gives the small hand intertwined with his own an encouraging squeeze as the other, equipped with an antiseptic wipe, dutifully dabs away at a scuffed knee. His young patient, having tripped and burned her skin along the carpet, is nothing less than a trooper as he cleans the static from the shallow wound. Not even a sniffle!

He tucks the wipe into the flat of his palm and trades it out for ointment, smearing a healthy dollop of it along the reddened surface before wiping his finger along the striping of his pants and reaching for a bandaid; Chica pink with pizzas on one side and cupcakes on the other.

“There, now. I’m sure that feels better already!”

Blood. Viscous, cold, pooling at his feet. On the walls, the carpet. His hands. Cherry red like a lollipop and twice as sticky…or so he���s told. Nothing a robot of his nature is meant to see or understand. His censors make sure of it. Rather than allow him to see things are they are, the incarnadine color is suppressed behind a layer of static, as if he won’t care to acknowledge it at all beyond its existence on scraped knees and split lips. As if he is meant to ignore the way it feels in its abundance, caked against his palms and festering between his open joints.

Messy, messy, messy. He feels dirtied beyond repair, filthy in a way that even a deep cleaning won’t fix. The wires in his stomach feel twisted, begging to come undone, shorting like sparklers against their ports and threatening to make short work of bringing him down. His screens are flooded with alerts that warn of an inevitable shut-down if he can’t manage to pull himself back together, but moving feels impossible, an insurmountable task. He can not think past the sensation of someone else’s life soaking into the cotton of his slippers.

And what of their guest? Sun can hardly get himself to look again, pleading with the matter of logic itself as he is forced to reckon with the knowledge that this is a rest they may never wake from. But he does look. He has to.

He wishes he hadn’t.

The brief glimpse he endures before looking anywhere else is more than enough. From this angle, the static – the blood – paints a grim picture. In spite of this, Sun finds himself circling the desk a second time and preparing to draw the body – the visitor – out from under the desk. It is a daunting task, but a necessary one, by Sun’s account. If there is nothing to be done in such a hopeless situation then, at the very least, he owes this stranger the dignity of recognition and an attempt. He can claim to have looked for a pulse. Even so, he hesitates.

There is not one to be found; Sun knows this. He knows painfully well from the static lingering on his silicone that it is already too late. Oil is warmed by the processors it fuels, and similarly, blood is meant to be hot. The soles of his slippers are cold. The pads of his fingers, against even the raging inferno of his overworked circuitry, are cold.

The body is cold.

He perseveres, regardless, dragging the stranger out from under the desk by a shaky grip on their ankle one inch at a time, pausing every few tugs to look away and regather his confidence, trying so, so hard to tune out the ever-constant music as it merrily sings through the speakers.

He begs the underlying silence. “Please have a pulse.” Tug. “Please don’t be cold.” Tug. “I don’t know what to do.” Tug. “I can’t do this alone.” Tug. “You have to wake up.” Tug. “Please.” Tug. “Please!” Tug. “Please, please, please, pleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseple—”

He knows this visitor. Not a friend, but not quite a stranger, either. His scanner attempts to process the identification of a man whose head is so thick with static that it returns as an error. His face is contorted grotesquely, mouth slightly agape and eyes wide with fear. They don’t look like they’re sleeping.

A security guard whose name fails to ping in his registry. Sun had spoken with him once, maybe twice before. He drank coffee by the mile and hardly stuck around long enough to do more than complain about the weather. Sun hadn’t been in a hurry to befriend the man, but he only wished the best for him. Squeezed a joke in where he could in an attempt to turn his frown upside-down. It had never worked before, but Sun was no quitter. Now he would never get the chance to try again.

“Focus, focus.” Sun carefully lowers the man’s foot back to the carpet again, choking on the sensation of bloodied clothes slipping through his fingers and resisting the urge to tear the rays straight out of his faceplate in response. He is inconsolably panicked and at a loss for what to do, two steps from outright laughing, the complete absurdity of the situation driving him to hysterics.

He needed to call security. He couldn’t call security. Security was–

Management. There were other employees that worked the night shift if Moon complaining about them making too much noise during naptime was anything to go by. If he sent out a general call for assistance surely someone would come and tell him what to do, even at this late hour. It was his best option. His only option.

“Don’t.”

The voice makes him jump clear out of his casings. He has half a mind to swear, but as it stands, Sun thinks the long divots he dragged into the service desk out of surprise are enough damage already. On top of everything else.

“Moon?” He whispers. “Nice of you to finally join us – and by us, I mean me and the deceased guest I discovered a moment ago. Do you have a clue what’s going on here?”

“Don’t?” Sun echoes, agitated, “Don’t what?”

“Don’t.”

If the tether keeping his sanity intact was fraying before, it’s now down to a single thread. “Why not?” He asks with great exhaustion, “Did you not hear me? This is an emergency! There is a dead body in the–”

“Call management.”

“I know.”

Silence answers. Despite having a hundred and one snarky retorts building in between each crackle and pop of his voice box, Sun has nothing to say to that. Nothing good, anyway. It takes nine steady ticks of the clock for him to recollect his thoughts.

“You…you know?” He stutters, “How could you…” but he doesn’t finish the question, and he doesn’t need to. Realization strikes him with an iron fist for the second time that day and it is no less kinder than the first. “Did… you do this?”

It’s Moon’s turn to go quiet.

That silence stretches on for what feels like hours to Sun, each passing second more agonizing than the last, until he starts to believe Moon had simply disappeared like before. He waits, and waits, and finally decides to interrupt the silence with a repeat of the question, despite already knowing the answer. Moon beats him to it.

The tired sigh that escapes Sun’s throat is thoroughly earned. “Well, it’s too late to figure something else out, I already sent out the emergency ping.”

“Not sure,” he says, and Sun can tell from his tone that it’s the truth. “Blurry. My head hurts.”

A sound like nothing he’s ever heard before tears itself from Moon’s voicebox. A growl, if he were to put a name to it.

“Get rid of it, then.” Moon insists through the noise, “Clean up, clean up.”

“It?” Sun gawks, “Moon, that – that’s a person. He has dignity, a family!”

“Had a family,” Moon corrects, “dead, now. No dignity. Who will they blame?”

The question gives him pause. Surely there was a better way to go about this, a solution that didn’t have his morals (and wires, for that matter) all up in a twist. Yet the longer he thinks about it, the more he realizes Moon is right. Management hardly listens when he tries to explain that it was the children who broke a piece of playground equipment, not him! They aren’t likely to give his explanation of simply having found the body any mind, much less understanding. With his counterpart practically admitting to the heinous act, already, informing management of the body would sooner see them decommissioned.

“Running out of time,” Moon reminds him, “Tick, tock, tick, tock, tick–”

“Alright, alright!” He wails, “What should I do, then?”

“Clean up.”

“Where?” Sun looks around with the desperation of a teenager attempting to play hooky, rays practically nonexistent with how he’s tucked them away. His eyes search the room from top to bottom before landing determinedly on the ball pit.

“Good enough,” Moon tuts, a rather uninspired response to the happenings around him. Of course he isn’t panicking, it isn’t him who takes the body by its ankles and drags the dead weight across the carpet. It isn’t him who shoves aside enough plastic to carefully hide a corpse in. But it should be him worrying, it should be him panicking, because if management finds out about their secret, it’ll spell doom for both of them.

“You’ll get rid of it – him – properly once there’s no one around, right?” Sun finishes reshuffling the ball pit, mostly confident that the ill deed is successfully hidden from view. “I’m going to have to wash each and every one of these balls before the kids arrive in the morning.”

Right, the kids. When they arrive in just a few hours, will he have things tidied up? Will he be able to carry on as though nothing happened? He’s a brilliant actor – or he used to be, anyway, before the company decided he better fit the role of a nanny – but this is well beyond the scripts he is most familiar with.

“They’re close,” Moon warns him, “Don’t let them see–”

“I know, I know.” No time to dwell on it now, he makes quick work of crossing the distance between the ball pit and the exit, and manages to slide his head and torso through the gap between doors within seconds of it opening, scaring the living daylights of the poor employee sent to greet him in the process.

Unlike Sun, they do swear, clutching a hand over their chest and fitting him with a downright awful deadpanned stare. “Fuck, you couldn’t have waited a few seconds longer for me to come inside?” They hiss.

“Sorry, friend! Didn’t mean to spook you,” Sun chirps. He is careful to keep his bloodied hands safely tucked behind his back. “It’s just a mess in here, is all, and I’m rather embarrassed. There’s still equipment to clean, toys to organize, papers to fold–”

“Sure,” the employee interrupts, “It doesn’t really–” they pinch the bridge of their nose, exhaling with notably less exhaustion than Sun is feeling right about now, “I don’t particularly care. What’s the big issue that I was called down here for?”

“Oh! I just wanted to know if the next shipment of wipes had come in, yet. Like I said before, much to do! Always busy, busy, busy!”

Their stare turns into an outright glower. “That’s why you called the emergency line? For cleaning supplies?”

Sun shrugs, feigning ignorance. “Well, that’s an emergency to me. Apparently our standards are not the same.” He watches them roll their eyes with more enthusiasm than necessary. ”Do you know how messy children can be? It’s practically a barnyard in here, every single day, and don’t even get me started on how much of a health code violation it would be if one of them were to pick their nose and then–”

“Fine, I get it,” they snap, “I’ll make sure your damn supplies are delivered before the daycare opens. Anything else?”

“Told you they were annoying,” Moon chimes in.

“That’s everything!” He replies, “thank you a mighty amount, friend!”

“Mhm,” they mutter, waving him off with nothing more than the noncommittal sound. When they do turn to leave, it’s not soon enough, and Sun just barely manages to close the door with a whisper instead of a slam.

His back rests against it a moment later, and he allows himself to collapse from there, sliding down the smooth wooden frame until his tailbone reaches the floor. His knees twinge as they tuck against his chest, and he folds both arms atop, resting his temple against them and taking one long, much needed moment to just breathe.

It had only been half of a lie. There was much to do, much to clean, and only so many hours remaining to get it done. The wires nestled deep in his chest had calmed, yet the tremor in his hands continued, as it likely would until the very last speck of blood was washed clean.

“…Moon?”

“Hm?”

Sun tucks his knees ever closer. “Why…why did you do it?”

“…”

“I w-won’t be mad, promise! I’m sure this is all just one big misunderstanding, after all – a one time event, no biggie! But…was it out of anger? Fear? I mean, did he hurt–”

“In my way,” Moon replies.

Sun’s head lifts from the dark haven his arms provide, noting with growing exhaustion that, for the very first time, the lights felt too bright even for him. “What do you mean by that?” He asks, “Did he keep you from doing something?”

“…I don’t know.”

Again, Sun’s head falls against his arms in defeat, and again, not two seconds later, it lifts, determined not to lollygag any longer.

His legs creak with vocal effort as he gets back to his feet. “Well, no point in dwelling on it now, I suppose. I’m sure it’s nothing.” He takes in a wide view of the daycare – static trailing everywhere – and deflates with a sigh. “Guess I better get started. The sooner we get the place cleaned up, the sooner we can forget about all of this.”

He takes a step forward, and only that, swiveling on his heel when he catches last night’s roster from the corner of his eye. A single drop of static had landed and smeared across the name of a child meant to go home later in the evening.

Strangely enough, it appears they were never picked up.

Sun shrugs, gathering the paper in both hands and crumpling it into a ball to dispose of the smeared evidence. A simple mistake with the roster, that’s all it is. The parents often forget to sign their name after all. Accidents happen all the time!

The paper lands with a soft thunk in the nearest trash can and is just as quickly forgotten. Sun pivots towards the play area once more and heads for the supply closet, steadfast in his determination to be cleaned up on time, and feeling more confident than he ought to be about how things ended, all things considered.

More than anything, he is just happy to have all of this behind them.

[sophiasharp]

Man I don’t think we talk enough about the fact that in the wildly accepted fanon, the ghouls were like. Creatures pulled out of a primitive society full of bloodshed and danger. These guys were just chilling in hell, fighting for their lives every day like you do, and now they’re on Earth, expected to figure out Earth manners and technology and how the fuck anything works. I’ve been thinking about it, though. Let me walk you through my thoughts

THE GHOULS TRANSITIONING TO LIFE ON EARTH

Aether

- Bull in a China shop

- Big man has gotten very good at controlling his strength over the years. That control was NOT there at first.

- Bumped into fucking everything too. Dude’s used to being in the wide open abyss the quintessence ghouls occupy. Suddenly having to learn special awareness was. A hurdle of his.

- He broke a lot of tables. And chairs. And plates. Mugs. One Sibling’s arm. He got there eventually but Omega had to walk him through how fragile everything on Earth is compared to their ghoulish strength.

- Part of his habit of jumping up and down also comes from how different Earth is to his home environment. You mean you can go up and then you’ll come down again? Automatically? What a concept! Gravity is so much fun!

- Still gets some sense of novelty out of electric lighting. Being able to just. Make the dark go away? Whenever? Amazing.

- He keeps a night light on in his room. The last person to make fun of him for it mysteriously ended up with 3rd degree burns.

Dewdrop:

- Skittish little fucker

- Kinda like that one video of those weird crabs reacting to the diver

- Dew, poking at a toaster: Friend? Friend? Friend? Big noise! Scared! Scared! Scared! Scared! … Friend? Friend?

- Fucking LOVED blankets and coats and jackets and robes and honestly just anything that will keep him warm. He was used to the cold, sure, but if he had a choice between that and being cuddled under 5 different comforters, possibly with another ghoul for extra body heat? It wasn’t even a competition.

- Still had to often be reminded to wear clothes. “We’re in a hellish commune, does anyone really care about one ghoul being naked?” “It’s not so much the nakedness as much as the being out and about without your uniform.”

- Warm food blew his Fucking mind. Coming from the frigid arctic, whatever warmth you’d get from your food’s internal temperature was short lived. Microwaves? Ovens? Tea Kettles? Marvelous. Truly a gift from the Dark One

- Got REALLY into cooking. Dude is a wizard in the kitchen. Watched so many kitchen shows once he figured out how TV’s worked and started replicating the really fancy meals they were creating on screen with whatever he could find around the Abbey and what the kitchen staff were willing to give him. Now, whenever there’s a big occasion, he’s the one asked to oversee the food.

Mountain:

- weirdly calm and placid about everything despite not knowing how literally anything worked.

- Just casually curious about everything. Was always asking questions. Not in an annoying way, but just politely inquisitive.

- There was like a 50/50 chance he was actually listening to you at any given point in time. I mean, there are so many new sights, sounds, smells to experience! Can’t expect him to be 100% there when there’s still so much new splendor all around!

- If ever he was confronted with something new but no one was around to explain what it was, he would instead try to just. Figure it out on his own using his best judgement.

- This is how he once ended up straight up eating someone’s phone. This was very early on, mind you, but it was so smooth and shiny! And the precious metals inside were so tasty! He knows better now, of course. But there are some days where he’s tempted to give his ministry-issued smartphone a nibble…

- Figured out his love of gardening pretty damn fast considering that’s what he was originally summoned for. However, aside from tending to Primo’s garden, he found himself still going out to tend to the plants even in his free time. It’s calming to him, reminds him of home. When things get overwhelming, the plants are there to let him channel his worry into something producing.

- His first personal plant was a small pot of rosemary. He kept it in the window of his room and took *such* good care of it. It’s still there to this day, nestled among the other plants he’s accumulated of the years.

Swiss

- he is so excited about everything!!!!

- He has to be touching all the new things all the time! What does it do? How is it made?? Can he eat it??? A lot of things that were small enough went straight into his mouth. Copia needed to keep a spray bottle on him at all times to make sure he didn’t hurt himself.

- Of course, when he was around the other ghouls, he played it cool. Have to make a good impression on his new (and hopefully permanent) packmates after all. He reeeaaaally didn’t want get sent back to the pit so getting in good with the rest of the band was TOP priority!

- In fact that need to be liked was bordering on unhealthy and sort of sabotaged himself a bit. Acting all suave and cocksure when the entire rest of the band was on high alert does that.

- Most of the ghouls regarded him with a hefty amount of distrust at first- being the first summon of the new boss came with a LOT of baggage -but Cumulus saw straight through him. He was just a silly little guy! She became his first real friend amongst the pack.

- The two became menaces together, exploring the abbey and messing with shit they probably shouldn’t have. Primo’s garden was a favorite of theirs, much to Mountain’s chagrin.

- Was just SOOOO fascinated by this new body he’s been put in. Unlike most the other ghouls, he didn’t have a physical body he inhabited back in hell, only being given one when he was summoned to the surface. Flesh! If feels funny! What does this thing down here do-

Cumulus:

- was honestly kinda scared at first, what with the whole mood of the pack being out of wack.

- Apparently their new boss might have killed someone? That’s the guy that summoned them? Uh oh!

- Stayed glued to Cirrus in the beginning. Being summoned together meant having a strong built-in bond with each other, always having access to what the other is feeling. Being together offered a much-needed sense of comfort to Cumulus. Getting to spend time with a really pretty girl wasn’t bad either.

- Swiss was the one to bring her out of her shell, imbuing her with confidence through his own fake bravado. They came to rely on each other in that sense. When Cumulus was scared to do the things she wanted, Swiss would convince her of her capability. When Swiss was anxious and felt like a fraud, Cumulus would remind him of his sincerity.

- Was very curious about how her magic worked on the surface versus how it did in the pit. Back home, she was used to having to beat against the constant winds of the first layer of hell. Now that she’s on Earth, her powers are much more powerful than she ever expected them to be!

- LOVED textiles. She surrounded herself in all things soft and fluffy. Her bedroom (and most nights Cirrus’s as well) is just so Fucking cozy. Blankets and pillows everywhere. Her stuffed animal collection is unmatched. Will cry if even one of them ends up on the floor.

- Dew was the one to help her start her collection. To this day they are each other’s #1 cuddle buddies.

Cirrus:

- Stone cold badass front to hide how nervous she was.

- VERY protective of Cumulus in the beginning. She could feel how scared she was and felt the need to step up and protect the both of them from any threat this new environment may have… even if the perceived threat is a bit stupid.

- She once kicked in the washing machine cause it made a sound once it was done and it startled her. Not her proudest moment.

- Was almost OVERPROTECTIVE of Cumulus at first, even, doing even the simplest of tasks for her to prevent risk of injury. That was until she watched her kick a sibling straight in the nuts for making snide remarks about Cirrus in front of her. Cirrus had never fallen in love faster.

- Took a LONG while to warm up to the others. Constantly felt like she had something to prove, like she needed to show that she wouldn’t buckle under pressure. Everyone (but Cumulus) was a threat.

- Adores weather on Earth and how it isn’t just WIND 24/7. She loves all the different shapes of the clouds, how dark they get with moisture, the gentle snowfall or the needle-like rain. Really puts her at peace to be out on a rainy day

Rain:

- S C A R E D

- Everything is new and bright and cold and heavy and loud and- and- and-

- Yeah he barely left his room for a week, didn’t talk to anyone for anything. Not shy, necessarily, but just freaked the fuck OUT. They were starting to think he was nonverbal cause man refused to use his voice. In his defense, talking outside the water feels very different when you’re used to your vocal cords wiggling in water all your life.

- In my brain the first time he did speak was to Copia after he did his lil oopsie with the rest of the pack. It’s like a day later and Copia’s tryna plan how he’s gonna make it up to the ghouls when rain cornered him in a dark hallway, made direct eye contact, and in the softest voice went “I wouldn’t go near the lake if I were you. It’s hard to hear screaming underwater.” He then left a completely stunned and freaked tf out Copia standing alone in the hall like it never happened.

- He kinda regrets letting his first words on Earth be a threat now but the rest of the pack is flattered, although they do still sometimes tease him for it.

- Really started coming out of his shell when Dew made dinner for him. Dew was in the same shoes as him once and, although his relationship with the new water ghoul was complicated, he still felt obligated to help his new packmate adjust to life on Earth.

- Bro went through the trouble of showing Rain what every little thing in the kitchen did so he wouldn’t be scared to make his own food anymore, all while making him some grade A gourmet dining. Dew didn’t know it at the time but that’s when the heart-eyes started.

[httpscomexe]

Forbidden Secret Desire 4

Summary: You finally put all of the pieces together and your pursuer tries to make a move, failing horribly, so you decide it’s the best plan to just escape.

(Find What I’m currently writing by checking my pinned post)

Parings: Logan Howlett x Reader

Warnings: (Individual warnings per chapter) Mentions of hidden camera, forced touch, clueless reader. Logan is an official warning as approved by the FDA (Food and Drug Administration) because Logan is a DRUG. PLEASE BE AWARE that this will be a NON-CON fic. Do NOT get attached if you do not like non-consensual fiction. I will not change my fic plans because somebody decided not to read the warnings. Thank you.

Tags: @remmyj10 @sammyluvsfics @badbishsblog @dickmaster3000 @cellyx33

Word Count: 3483 (All other chapters here) Chapter 5

P.S. If you’d like to be tagged, ask in the comments, you also have permission to send an ask, but make sure it is NOT anonymous, so I know your username, don’t worry, I’m scared of confrontation too. But this is a SAFE SPACE where I will not judge. Thank you again.

Enjoy your Forbidden Secret Desire…

“Logan?” You call his name as you barge into his office without knocking, not bothering to have any boundaries since the matter seemed important. You were being watched through a camera for the last two days after all.

“Is Mr. Howlett in here?” You ask after being allowed in the lounge where some other teachers were having their lunch break. You had been searching for him all day, and you haven’t seen him once. You figured you would’ve seen him during third period, since he was supposed to be the substitute the entire week, but looked to no avail. You even asked around, wondering if anyone else had seen him. You were slightly hopeful when a few students claimed they saw him on hall duty during the first passing period, but then you were once again in the dark.

You skipped your fourth period also, hoping you might be able to find him outside in the garden or near the little park in the back of the school. Even searching the greenhouse, but of course. He was nowhere to be found. You knew he didn’t leave anywhere, his truck was still parked in the lot where it’s always parked, so eventually you just gave up on searching for him, and headed back to your room to catch up on any assignments you’d missed throughout the day.

As you entered your room and locked your door, you internally groaned. You weren’t sure what to do about the stupid bear, so you went into your closet to collect it.

“Oh! Mr. Howlett…” You yelp in surprise as you collide with Logan in your closet. “Uh what- what’re you doing in here?” You take a few steps back and cross your arms over your chest.

“I came to check on you, you’ve been missing all day.” He tells you, his voice seemed different, almost more tired or grumpier than usual.

“Oh, yea- I’ve actually been looking for you.” He sets the bear down on your desk, once again facing your bed. “Uh- I actually had a question about-” You look down at the bear, the little red light was gone. “Uh…”

“What is it?” He asks, his voice softening down to normal. But you don’t answer. Instead, you continue to look down at the bear. Its eyes were solid black and the whirring noise was gone.

“Never mind actually.” Your shoulders slump. If the red dot wasn’t there, then how would you prove to him that someone was watching you? Maybe he was the one watching you?

…

Nah. He wouldn’t do that. Right?

“Alright, well…” He crosses his arms, and looks down at you. “Are you sure? You look dumbfounded.” You see his hand in front of you but you pay it no mind, until you feel his index finger under your chin and he gently makes you look up at him and away from the bear. “Is it something about the bear? What’s going on?”

“No, no. Nothing’s going on, the bear is awesome. Everything’s cool.” There’s no fucking way he would’ve put a camera inside of the bears eye. Would he? He wouldn’t. He’s the only one that could’ve. No one else had been in your room before. Kurt has. Yesterday was his first time…

“You’re lying to me, pup. I don’t like it. Clearly something is going on.” Your eyes continue to stare into his, as if you were trying to connect to his soul.

“Nothing’s wrong, I promise.” You chuckle slightly. Maybe you shouldn’t bring it up to him… Just in case. “I would tell you if there was.” His hand moves, his index finger going from under your chin to gently caressing your jaw before his hand cups your cheek.

“I still feel like you’re lying to me, but okay.” He drops his hand down to his side and stares at you for a moment, now it was his turn to read into your soul.

But the bell rings just in time. “Anyways, I really have to finish some work that I wasn’t able to catch up on today. So I’ll see you tomorrow.” You force a soft smile onto your lips, trying to make everything seem fine instead of letting out your inner I’m being watched! Someone put a camera inside of my bear and has been watching me sleep! Also sometimes it would make this clicking sound so I’m pretty sure they’re also taking pictures of me when I’m getting dressed and undressed and I have NO idea what to do PLEASE HOLD ME!

That wouldn’t be very appropriate.

“Alright. Well, let me know if you need me for anything please. Anything.” He repeats, his finger making its way back under your chin as you freeze and he presses a kiss to your forehead. Well that’s not very appropriate either now is it? “Have a good night, Y/N.” He tells you, before leaving the room. And you stand still in place. For about a solid ten minutes.

Thousands of thoughts race through your mind. Your brain completely detached from what's in front of you as you stare at the wall and picture nothingness. What if he was the one watching you? He wouldn’t do that. Then why was he kissing you? It was just the forehead. It’s still not appropriate, maybe you should tell someone you trust. You only trust him. What about Kurt? And what’s he gonna do? Seriously, you were sure Logan was just being friendly. He’s just as awkward as you. Now if he started going further, then you would worry. But for now, you had other matters to deal with. Including emails and homework.

You sit on your bed and open your computer to once again, another thousand emails from “Erik Lehnsherr,” all asking about things you know everything about. Nanotech, electricity, (Which was a bit personal if you ask me, considering you produce it) and a bunch of other stuff. Sometimes it makes you wonder why he doesn’t just ask google.

After answering a dozen of them, a few of them he decides to send back with a secondary question, before you finally send one last email.

“I’ll get back to you tomorrow. This is a lot of typing, so maybe it would be better to ask me some of these things in person? I have a lot of work to do also. So, goodnight!” You tap send, and it takes a moment before the ‘sent’ message pops up on the bottom of the screen. Now you just had to finish your homework. You tell yourself, opening your google classroom and tapping the first assignment. Reading human body language. Great.

“So he was just standing there?”

“Yea, it was so weird…”

“How did he get in?”

“I don’t know, he’s a teacher, maybe he has a key?”

“Still doesn’t explain why he was in your room.”

“He claims he was looking for me, I guess worried?” You explain, shrugging your shoulders with your locker open, Kurt leaning on the one next to you as you both talk back and forth.

“He couldn’t send you an email or a text.” You shrug again and close your locker.

“Look, correct me if I’m wrong, but he’s definitely the one that put the camera in your bear, it’s the only thing that would make sense.” It was now his turn to shrug.

“Oh come on. He’s not like that.” Kurt just stares at you, his head slightly tilted. “Ugh, you’re unbearable. I mean what makes you think he’s smart enough to know how to use a camera?”

“Literally no one else has had access to your room.”

“That’s the only thing that gets me.”

“Okay, then who else is on your list for who could’ve gone into your room, put a camera in your bear, then left without being noticed?” Silence. You obviously didn’t have any other names on your list. It was Wednesday already, and you’d just discovered the camera two days ago, so regardless of who it was, you still had to tough it out for the rest of the week to be able to report anything to Xavier. He apparently has no phone reception in the mountains. “Exactly.”

“What’re you two lovebirds talkin’ about?” Alex and Scott bring you out of your thoughts, Alex with a mouthful of pizza as Scott does the talking.

“I thought you two were out for the rest of the week?” Kurt turns away from you, ignoring Scotts comment. “Something about being disruptive in class?”

“Yea, we’re supposed to be at home but he forgot some books in his room.”

“He forgot them?”

“Yea.”

“Then why are you here?” Kurt crosses his arms, the tip of his sharp tail moving to wag as it glides across the lockers. Why did you never realise he has a tail? Wait… “Looks more like you two are the love birds in this situation.”

“Aww, are you getting mad cause we’re talking about your little girl-”

“Boys!” A female voice booms from the other side of the hall. “I gave you five minutes to collect your- wait, is that a pizza in your mouth! Where in the world- No you get back here!” They both quickly scramble away, and the teachers' heels echo as they pass you and Kurt to follow them.

You sigh. “Okay you make a point, but we should-”

“Report it?”

“No, we should leave it be until Xavier gets back.”

“Okay, what if it goes further than the camera? What if your clothes start going missing..?”

“If my clothes start going missing then maybe I’ll consider doing something. But honestly, it just doesn’t seem like him. Not only does he not seem the stalking type, but he definitely would NOT be able to figure out how to connect the camera to his phone, computer, whatever it is.” You explain quickly, not catching a breath until you’re finished.

“Okay… just.” He takes his own deep breath, looking down at you with soft eyes. “Let me know if you need anything from me, okay?”

“Okay. Thank you, Kurt. You’re too sweet.” You smile softly, softly punching his shoulder before beginning to turn around. “I’ll be in my room, so call if you need to, I’m not busy.” Pushing your door open, you see him leaving the lockers from the corner of your eye before you actually step into your room. Locking the door and then immediately checking every corner of your room to make sure no one was in there, before you finally relaxed. Or at least your body relaxed.

Your mind on the other hand raced with thoughts. What if it’s not Logan, and it’s some creep student. You’d be reporting the teacher who helped you be friends with Kurt. That wouldn’t be nice. On the other hand, what if it is Logan? Then what? You have to prove it to Xavier that it was him. The app on his phone showing the camera and the pictures in his gallery would prove it for sure. You realise he probably would’ve deleted everything by now. As soon as he realised the bear was moved into the closet I’m sure he would’ve gotten rid of the proof.

Your mind races for hours, and before you know it, the sun is down. Your head still pounding with what could be the case and what would happen if you did what, each scenario runs rampant in your head, making you dizzy as you unconsciously moved until you were lying on your stomach, your pillow thrown over the back of your head in attempt to silence the thoughts.

Then you feel a hand on the small of your back, immediately causing you to flinch and sit up on your ass, reading to start kicking the damned asshole that's been- oh its Kurt. Wait…

“Are you okay?” You don’t answer him, you instead spring forward, falling into his arms as a few stray tears fall from your cheeks, his tail moving up in the most attractive way possible to wipe the tears off your cheeks, his arms wrapped around your waist as he squeezes you.

You both sit like that for a while, at some point he even moves to lean against your headboard, still holding you in his lap, then his hands move, causing you to sit up slightly, unaware of the way you were positioned on his lap as his hands cradle your face and he looks into your eyes.

“What’s going on?” He whispers softly, not exactly expecting an answer, but figuring your eyes would probably tell him anyway. You sniffle.

“Wait-” Your voice cracks, and you shut your eyes to think. “How did you- when- why?”

“Are you gonna finish any of those questions?” He asks rhetorically, his hands making their way to rest on your thighs. “I came in here like five minutes ago, You weren’t answering your phone and it’s only eight so I got worried.”

“And how..?”

“Honey, I can teleport.” He chuckles, his head tilting slightly, your brain completely ignoring the pet name he’s decided to give you.

“Oh… Yea…” You say softly, and you feel his tail move on your back before it pushes you carefully towards him, his hands moving to wrap back around your waist as he takes you in for another hug, and you rest your forehead on his shoulders. You weren’t crying anymore. Instead, new thoughts ran through your head. He can teleport.

He can teleport…

He can teleport…

He can… teleport?

You didn’t know that before. You snap back out of your brain to feel one of his hands on the bare skin of your back, which makes you sit up awkwardly, causing his hand to move across your waist until it's back on your thigh.

“I didn’t know you could teleport.”

“Really? I figured you knew that already.”

“No.” Your voice sounded more stern. He wouldn’t. Would he?

His hands gently move up. His left hand stopping on your wait and his right hand continuing up to your cheek, you also feel something wrap gently around your calf. Something felt wrong. And it makes you feel sick. You clear your throat a little, and try to count to yourself.

Shit… His right hand moves just slightly, his thumb moving softly over your bottom lip as you stare into his eyes, your brows quirked in confusion but they were devoured in tiredness. Then his hand gently cups the back of your neck, and his tail wraps just slightly tighter around your calf. Then he kisses you. Why is he kissing you? He’s supposed to just be your friend. He shouldn’t be doing this. You pull away slightly, but his lips just trail down from your lips to your neck, gently biting at your skin. You open your mouth to say something, but your voice catches in your throat. Then both of his hands gently move down to your waist before he softly pushes you onto your back. NOPE.

You scramble out from under him, but his tail tightens around your calf. “What’s wrong…?” He asks, trying his hardest to sound innocent.

“What do you think you’re doing..?” You finally choke out, pulling again before his tail finally loosens around your leg.

“I just thought-”

“Please get out.” You demand, not letting him finish. Your voice embarrassingly raises a few octaves as you speak. “Now.” Voice shaking, you sit up straight before he finally moves.

“Okay… I’m sorry.” He tells you softly, getting off your bed and making his way to the door, “Goodnight.” He says before finally leaving.

Then you actually catch your breath. What the fuck just happened. He can teleport. Logan. Logan in the morning. Logan…

“Logan!” You barge into his office, but this time he’s there, looking at his computer for a moment before his eyes shift onto you above the screen, barging in with red cheeks and a red nose, and a shaking body. Which is why he stands up quickly and walks towards you, letting him fall into his arms and sob quietly.

“There you go… you’re okay, pup. It’s okay… just breathe.” He whispers soothingly, pressing gentle kisses to the top of your head as his hand softly runs over your back, trying with his best effort to get you to calm down, and reaching behind you for a moment to lock his door, making sure no one else could barge in. “It’s okay, pup… I’ve got you.” He kisses the top of your head one final time before resting his chin there, his arms still wrapped around you as your own arms are squeezing around his waist.

“Okay…” He whispers again after a few moments of not hearing your sobbing. “Tell me what’s going on?” He gently moves his hands to rest on your shoulders, carefully creating a distance big enough for him to look down at you as you use the backs of your hands to dry your cheeks.

“There was a camera…” You start, actually debating whether or not to tell him. Fuck it. You tell yourself again. “It was inside of my bear's eye, and it was watching me, and at first the whirring sound didn’t bother me cause I thought it was my neighbours, I don’t have neighbours, and the clicking drove me crazy. I couldn’t think, every time there was a click. He said it was you, but you don’t know how to deal with simple tech, I told him that, you were the only other one to touch the bear, and he’s never been in my room before, but he can teleport, he teleported, I didn’t know he could teleport, then I ask him, and he kissed me and-”

“Okay, okay.” He interrupts you finally, placing his palm over your mouth. “So somebody put a camera in the eye of your bear?”

“Mhm, Kurt.”

“Okay…” He nods slightly, squinting his eyes as if to take in the information. “He was taking pictures of you, and whirring and clicking what’s with that?”

“See that’s why I know it wasn’t you… It was the camera making sounds.”

“And Kurt thought it was me?” You nod. “He said he’s never been in your room before?” You nod again. “But he can… teleport?” He finishes, making you nod hysterically.

“And then he forced me to kiss him…” You pout a little, your shoulders dropping as you remember what happened in detail. It disgusted you.

“He…” He clears his throat slightly. “Forced you to kiss him…” His voice deepens, but you don’t notice it as you nod some more. “Should I call him in here?” He shrugs himself a little.

“No, no. No, I don't want to see him.” You move away slightly, freaking out.

“Okay, okay. Pup, hun, come here.” He reaches out, gently cupping your face in his hands. “If you don’t want me to then I won’t. But you have to tell me what you want me to do.”

“Am I able to get another room?” His jaw clenches slightly as he thinks about it, then he lets go of you and moves to look at his computer. After moving his mouse and typing some things on his keyboard. “So I can’t. I can only see what room students have, you can request it from Xavier though and he will look into it when he gets-” You groan in the middle of his sentence as he moves away from his desk and you land your forehead on his chest. “-back from his mission.” He finishes telling you, gently wrapping his arms around your waist to pull you closer.

“I don’t wanna be alone in my room anymore at night though. What if he comes in while I’m sleeping? Or what if-” He silences you by placing his palm over your mouth again.

“The only thing I can suggest is not sleeping in the mansion until you get a room change.”

“But I’m not allowed to leave…”

“How is Xavier gonna know?”

“I don’t have a place to go…”

“I have a log cabin.” He tells you, making your eyes practically sparkle slightly. “If you’d like, I can take the rest of the week off and take you there. I can put in an excuse for you.”

You think about it, your eyes leaving his eyes as they stare past him.

“You don’t have to of course. It’s completely up to you. But if you really want to get away from Kurt, then come with me to the cabin. I’ll keep you safe.” He tells you, his left arm moving around your waist and his right hand gently tilting your head up so he could look into your eyes.

“Okay…” You whisper, moving closer again to fall into his arms and onto his chest as his arms snake back around you, as he presses one final kiss to your forehead…