#LAST GODDAMN TIME THIS HAPPENED

[icehot13]

a chapter earlier than expected!!!! this is The Chapter i wrote the fic for, because of course there always is one

also please enjoy this visual for the chapter, this is what the area above a hard-lid ceiling looks like! It’s not tall enough to stand in, the only light is what you bring up yourself, and you can only put weight on the metal frames going across it because the space between is just drywall. 

[lord-squiggletits]

One of my favorite parts of phase 2 (and indeed one of the few moments I resonated with IDW Prowl) was when the neutrals were coming back to Cybertron and Prowl said that he refused to let Autobots be pushed aside and overruled after they were the ones who fought for freedom for 4 million years (the exact wording escapes me atm).

And I mean, that resentment still holds true even once the colonists come on bc like. As much as it's true that Cybertron's culture is fucked up, and as funny as it can be to paint Cybertronians as a bunch of weirdos who consider trying to kill someone as a common greeting not important enough to hold a grudge over.... The colonists POV kind of pissed me off a lot of times, as did the narrative tone/implications that Cybertronians are forever warlike and doomed to die by their own hands bc it just strikes me as an extremely judgemental and unsympathetic way to deal with a huge group of people with massive war PTSD and political/social tensions that were rampant even before the war?

Like, imagine living in a society rife with bigotry and discrimination where you get locked into certain occupations and social strata based on how you were born. The political tension is so bad there's a string of assassinations of politicians and leaders. The whole planet erupts into an outright war that leads (even unintentionally) to famine and chemical/biological warfare that destroys your planet. Both sides of the war are so entrenched in their pre-war sides and resentment for each other that this war lasts 4 million years and you don't even have a home planet any more. Then your home planet gets restored and a bunch of sheltered fucks come home and go "ewww why are you so violent?? You're a bunch of freaks just go live in the wilderness so that our home can belong to The Pure People Who Weren't Stupid And Evil Enough To Be Trapped In War" and then a bunch of colonists from places that know nothing about your history go "lol you people are so weird?? 🤣🤣 I don't get why y'all are fighting can't you just like, stop??? Oh okay you people are just fucked up and evil and stupid then" ((their planets are based on colonialism where their Primes wiped out the native populations btw whereas the Autobots and OP in particular fought to save organics. But that never gets brought up as a point in their favor)) as if the damage of a lifetime of war and a society that was broken even before the war can just magically go away now that the war is over.

Prowl fucking sucks but he was basically the only person that pointed out the injustice of that.

And then from then on out most of the characters from other colonies like Caminus and wherever else are going "i fucking hate you and your conflicts" w/ people like literal-nobody Slide and various Camiens getting to just sit there lecturing Optimus about how Cybertronians are too violent for their own good and how their conflicts are stupid, with only brief sympathetic moments where the Cybertronians get to be recognized as their own ppl who deserve sympathy before going right back to being lambasted.

Like I literally struggled to enjoy the story at multiple points because there was only so much I could take of the characters I knew and loved being raked over coals constantly while barely getting to defend themselves or be defended by the narrative so like. It was just fucking depressing and a little infuriating to read exRID/OP

[eikichi-supremacy]

they don't deserve him ...

[dirtytransmasc]

I hope we get a scene of Alicent with Aegon's body. If her son is damned to die, if she is damned to spiral into insanity, if she is to lose her life too the grief, let me see her with his body.

let her hold her baby in her arms one more time. let her wipe the blood that poured from his mouth and nose as he died. let her run her fingers over the viscous burns that adorn his skin. let her fix his hair. let her bathe him with a cloth as she had when he was a babe. let her kiss his cheek, his forehead, his hair, his hands. let her lay her head against him, hugging him like she had failed to do for years.

he was her firstborn and yet, her heart was still beating and his was not, she was not yet cold in her grave, no, no her son was cold, her flesh was warm, too warm. he was her baby, her son, the boy she tried so hard to protect, who had loved even when it hurt, who she had stood in front of a dragon for. she loved him, the very bones of him, and now he was dead.

let her lose her mind right there, in that room, still clinging to her body, one that's too cold, too still, too quiet. let her scream out to the gods, damning them, cursing them for taking her eldest son, amongst everything else in her life.

I want her to drive away anyone who tries to take him from her, forcing the silent sisters or whoever would be left to deal with his body at that point. let her curse and spit and claw at anyone who comes too close.

she would stay there for hours, reflecting on her memories of him. maybe she talks to him or hums a lullaby until she finally loses her battle with what remains of her consciousness and sanity, falling still against the table.

she dreams of Aegon, she dreams of the life she wish she could have provided, the life she had tried so hard to give him. a life where he was safe, a life where she had been a better mother, a life where she didn't need to live in and impose fear up on her children. maybe if she had tried hard enough he would still be alive, she'll think as she floats in the space between consciousness and unconsciousness.

she'll wake in plain chambers she only partly recognizes, she'll learn of her sons lackluster and sparsly accompanied burning, she'll learn her son was gone and she was alone. there won't be much of her left to care. she just continues dreaming, dreaming of her dead children and spiraling to madness until her broken heart finally gives out.

[my previous post inspired this, cause all I can think about now is Alicent mourning her son and its gonna put me in an early grave]

[tearlessrain]

seriously can catastrophes stop happening for five minutes my brain is already fried from the ones we're already experiencing

[journey-to-the-attic]

my back hurts like hell and i'm stuck inside for the day SO i've just been thinking about the newspaper club and their dynamics with characters outside the club

honestly this is more for me than anything but i thought i'd give em a post anyway :^) these aren't 'finalised' in the sense that they're all going to end up in the fic (especially since i also talk about the s4 trio, who won't even be appearing), but i'd call these 'canonical' to jtta in a broad sense of the term

^for reference in case anyone's not aware - from left to right, mephisto (pink), astaroth (blue), wiz (purple), alecto (green)

alecto & lucifer

we already see belphie calling alecto in to deal with caim in ch42, so kind of building on that idea: alecto sort of becomes the student council's secret agent in all but name

so lucifer (being the de-facto leader, even if diavolo's technically the president) calls on her more often

at first lucifer just has her dealing with trouble-makers in school; then, seeing as she's so reliable, he has her helping run errands - and eventually he starts asking for favours outside of school, such as helping him track down a cursed record, seeing as she has a nose for magical contraband - in return, he helps alecto source certain artifacts for wiz, who's obsessed with them

then at some point along the line it becomes a less transactional relationship and more just being buds

they'll catch up with each other in the corridor and have a brief chat, occasionally they'll meet up for a coffee. they peak when alecto starts calling him 'bestie' as a joke and lucifer finds that he doesn't actually mind it

though unfortunately lucifer'll never get the opportunity to take advantage of his new friend's talents on the harpsichord, since alecto reserves those nearly exclusively for wiz

if i had to describe their dynamic it'd be: drinking buddies at the pub

one thing that lucifer did not foresee from this though: alecto really wants to fight him. no magic - that's boring and a foregone conclusion - just good old-fashioned hand to hand combat. he's been steadfastly refusing so far, but maybe one day she'll break him down...

alecto has seriously considered offering to play for him (which she's NEVER done for anyone outside the club) in exchange for a fist fight

alecto & raphael

ideal duo: one is goofy and the other has catholic guilt

more seriously, these two really do get on like a house on fire, even though you'd never be able to tell from a glance

whenever they're hanging out it just kinda looks like alecto's doing her own thing with raphael silently following along - but this is just what works for them

basically, raphael normally can't handle hanging out alone with someone who's above a certain energy level. and, while alecto is above that level, somehow she hits a sweet spot where she makes up for raphael's lack of energy in a way that doesn't overwhelm him

it does sometimes seem like alecto's talking to herself, but often raphael's comments are just too quiet for an outsider to hear

alecto regularly begs raphael to use his shower of spears on her to test her dodging skills, and unlike lucifer, raphael usually indulges her

one time she reflexively broke one of the spears and had to apologise profusely while raphael sadly held the shattered remains

(he wasn't that bummed, he just thought it was funny how guilty she was about it)

also alecto's got a talent for embroidery (if you look at her design - she stitched the daisies on her trousers and shoes herself), and raphael enjoys sewing, so they bond over that

wiz & levi

need a super specific prop complete with special effects for a cosplay? wiz is your gal

she's good with arts and crafts, and also knows SO MUCH about magical artifacts and their mechanisms that you could give her anything and she'd be able to reproduce it

and i need to make this clear: levi absolutely does NOT approach wiz first. he's terrified of her! why would he do that!!!!!

ik is the one who first asks wiz for help when levi's in a prop dilemma - he needs a specific wand

wiz makes it, PLUS adds in a feature where it makes colourful sparks when waved that correlate to the actual magic system of the show it's from

and levi's so blown away that he overcomes his fear to thank her in person, and after realising that overly friendly people aren't the scourges he views them as, slowly gets brave enough to ask her for help on his own

generally he just views wiz as, like, the super cool seasoned warrior that occasionally swoops in to save the main character from danger and deliver a life lesson

meanwhile wiz adopts him a little bit. not in the same way you adopt, like, a little sibling - more the way an older student adopts someone lower down in the school

she'll barter with fabric vendors in his stead to make sure he doesn't get ripped off buying materials and tell the cashier that he doesn't want pickles on his burger for him

wiz & om mephistopheles

i've sort of mentioned these in the s4 post, but i'll re-iterate (and explain) my point a bit here

wiz is really good at adjusting her own mannerisms and lingo to set whoever she's talking to at ease - so she's good at the sort of noble formal-speak that mephistopheles is used to

which is how they initially become sort-of friends; mephistopheles finds it easy to talk to her, and is subsequently a lot less standoffish and haughty than he usually comes off as - so wiz isn't immediately put off by his rich bitch attitude like most are

though mephistopheles does NOT like that wiz is so blase about breaking rules when it comes to magical artifacts, because she's usually disregarding direct reprimands from diavolo to do so

but (because he's got a good first impression of her), he has to begrudgingly respect the audacity

and since diavolo has sort of given up on getting her to listen, mephistopheles has decided he might as well look the other way as well

he enjoys consulting on the various puzzles wiz puts together for the newspaper, though it does sting whenever she gives him one that he genuinely can't solve

alecto cannot STAND him at first, but wiz keeps inviting him around to their house for tea (she feels bad for him because everyone seems to hate him), and she starts finding it really funny how much sugar he gets through

though whenever mephistopheles gets a little bit too royalist, wiz is quick to move the conversation somewhere else

astaroth & belphie

ohoho these guys...... (listen i promise the stargazing boyfriends will be a reality in-fic eventually)

they'll have been dating for months before either will admit it (it pisses asmo off because how is his baby brother going to start dating BEFORE him and not even acknowledge it?!!?!!?!?)

astaroth doesn't like talking about them and belphie's solution to just about everything is to sleep on it, but somehow they've both developed a radar for the other's problems

often belphie will just show up at his house without warning, and it's usually there that they spend time together - because tbh belphie would rather go without his brothers constantly butting in on his quality time

of the two of them, belphie gets the most nervous early on in the relationship - he's used to being able to read those he's close to easily (his twin connection with beel, ik's complete inability to keep her emotions from showing on her face), but astaroth's got a habit of just. forgetting to emote

belphie will be completely overthinking whether or not he's completely messed up this date and astaroth will just be staring blankly into the distance thinking "this is the happiest i've ever been"

he gets better at understanding him over time, though - to the point where he can somehow tell how astaroth's feeling based on the vibe of his silences whenever they're on call with each other

on that topic, they spend quite a lot of nights on the phone to each other when belphie's not over at his, since astaroth feels awkward staying the night at the hol - though most of the time belphie will fall asleep halfway through a conversation

astaroth & thirteen

these two don't seem like they'd get along at all, because astaroth seems way too normal to be interesting to thirteen

but here's the thing. he is not at all. and thirteen realises this as soon as they meet

get him talking and this guy has stories about having done the stupidest things, and somehow he thinks that it's normal behaviour - this is the only reason he can project that image

thirteen can never bring herself to explain to him that, no, astaroth, it isn't normal that your one solution for accidentally burning food is to rip out the entire cooker from the wall to shut off the fire. how are you even strong enough to do that????

astaroth isn't really one to get involved with the making of her traps (though he'll offer suggestions if she needs them) - thirteen doesn't go to him for that sort of thing, she goes to him for vibes

astaroth's visited her cave enough times that she's just installed a secret ramp corridor so that he doesn't have to deal with the security spells every time

they're very in-sync when it comes to making fun of other people - essentially they're that "true friends judge other people.... together" post

they're not super close emotionally, but with astaroth being so into the stars and ~the endless universe~ and thirteen being in close proximity with death, occasionally their conversations take a turn for the intensely philosophical

mephisto & solomon

*slaps head of boys* these bitches have a relationship SO complicated

they're in a weird place after the whole sonno thing, where solomon's finally gotten some closure on having been abandoned, but he really doesn't like it

meanwhile mephisto doesn't think it's a good idea to try to bridge the gap after all this time, so he just kinda withdraws emotionally

which solomon hates even more, because he's just perceiving this as a second abandonment

whether in a romantic way or not, back in that time where they were each other's only company during his studies - solomon might have loved him then. and to be honest he's never really let it go

there's this whole cocktail of resentment, grief, guilt, relief, hope and devotion going on, and neither of them know how to handle it

it gets weirder because eventually they settle in with a new dynamic - of good-natured banter while carefully ignoring what they both know the other is thinking

and it's comfortable, but the thing about these two is their relationship has never been static like this

the one constant has always just been each other; even back then, feelings were mixing and flipping on a dime, which is probably why neither's ever used a label for whatever the hell they were

figuring it out was always going to messy, but mephisto left before they could, and now they're at this motionless stage where both are avoiding moving forward - for fear that the other isn't willing to take the plunge

mephisto & diavolo/barbatos

diavolo and mephisto SEEM like they really don't like each other - which would have been true pre-jtta, but after the whole ordeal with sonno, they've both silently agreed to let bygones be bygones

but they still tend to avoid each other's company, though not necessarily deliberately - it's just that they share a lot of bad memories from that old time, and seeing the other tends to remind them of it

however, they've also both developed an odd, subconscious sense of duty to the other; essentially, they'll go out of their way to assist/defend each other, but only if they don't have to be alone together to do so

neither feels they have much to say in terms of reconciling their pasts, so they don't

meanwhile, mephisto and barbatos don't tend to hold much stock in their shared past - but, unlike with diavolo, they do share some fond memories, so there's still a certain degree of affection to their relationship

similarly, they feel an obligation to each other - if anything, theirs is stronger, since as chronodae they share a sort of mutual connection that's beyond ordinary comprehension

and, while they'd describe each other as 'an old friend', they're not close in the same way that friends are; rather, they're close in the same way that two moths seeking the same light have an instinctive mutual understanding of what drives the other - though neither would be able to put it into words

some more misc ones that i don't have a lot to say about, but i like

astaroth and raphael are pretty chill - they like hanging out together bc neither likes talking a bunch, but enjoys passive company, so their hangouts mostly entail being in the same general area but doing completely different things

lucifer and astaroth share a lot of their tastes in music, so occasionally lucifer will ask astaroth for recommendations. sometimes when belphie's feeling nice and he knows lucifer's been overworking lately, he'll call astaroth over to perform a little concert in the music room

mephisto and levi don't tend to talk, since their history makes it kind of awkward (even though levi's mostly forgiven him at this point), but when they do mephisto's always weirdly nice to him. no ridiculous jokes, no antics - tbh it's kind of unnerving how pleasant he is

wiz and satan don't talk a lot, but when they get started they'll go on for FOREVER, because they're both magic nerds with special interests in curses (wiz used to be a curse-breaker herself) and magical artifacts. a similar thing happens with solomon, except that tend to engage in more scholarly debates rather than just gushing or throwing fun facts back and forth

lucifer respects wiz as a mage, but finds it difficult to talk to her because she has a disconcerting habit of looking very hard at whoever she's talking to, and he doesn't do well with perceived scrutiny

alecto and belphie have a mutual understanding going on where, if one needs assistance from the other, it's given without question - but they don't hang out a lot, since alecto's the type of demon that belphie can't really handle without a buffer

lucifer finds mephisto insufferable but he also thinks he's really funny, so he's constantly having an internal struggle whenever he's around

mammon has wanted to ask astaroth how fast he can go on his wheelchair for a really long time but he's never worked up the nerve to (astaroth's whole monotone stoic deal intimidates him)

simeon gets along super well with the girls and will usually ask them first if he needs someone to babysit luke for whatever reason

astaroth doesn't like sugar, but one time luke offered him a cookie and he felt too awkward to refuse. but now luke KEEPS offering him sweets, and now he's trapped himself

mephisto and thirteen are thick as thieves - but, don't get me wrong, they'd NEVER emotionally confide in each other. what they've got going on is some kind of troublemaking goblin solidarity

wiz's expertise also makes her a perfect consultant when it comes to thirteen's traps, so you'll often see them poring over blueprints together

[hella1975]

you ever have a fic get you in such a chokehold you start pacing your room and talking to yourself

[gen-is-gone]

hrgh every time I think I've come close to forgiving lance fucking parkin I skim the gallifrey chronicles. and then I remember the Horrors.

[nejackdaw]

Thinking about Celann and his ever present grief at the life he could have had, he and his wife and (he always hoped) their daughter. A life where he was a father--he'd hardly ever wanted anything more than that. So full of love he was ready to burst and needed somewhere to put it, wanted a life with his favorite girls.

Thinking about how the ever present desire haunts him no matter how deep he buried it. It keeps coming back, relentlessly, this anguish that he threw it all away. He could have had exactly what he wanted and he was stupid enough to abandon it all, and for what? Because he was upset? But then he always remembers how hollow he felt after the incident, like if you rapped him with a knuckle you'd hear he was just a shell. He forgives himself, then, remembers how wrong everything felt, and he thinks about all the time he spent desperately trying to make everything feel right again.

Remembers when he realized he was the problem, what needed to be fixed. Removed.

He abandoned the life he had and every dream he'd ever held close because he wasn't him anymore. Celann would never have killed anyone, would never have done... that. He was some other Celann, different, trying to make himself fit in the life of a man that no longer existed. And so he left.

And he has no right to ache so badly at the thought of what he gave up, no right to ache at the loss of a family (of two families, but he starts thinking that and breaks every time, so he's gotten good at simply skipping over the thought) when he was a killer--an adept one, a practiced one--that could mangle and maul and kill and do it again and again. What right does he have to still want that happy little dream?

But the dream is a ghost and it haunts him, is there every time he's out on a supply run and sees kids playing around the marketplace, sees women cradling infants and fathers carrying sons on their shoulders. (He reminds himself of the blood on his hands, is scared he might stain them with it if he reaches out to touch them.) It's there when he has a bag and his axe hanging from his hips and finds a girl crying for her mother, lost and separated, jostled by the crowd.

It's there as he calms her, kneeling on wet and gritty stone, hovering between her and the flow of the crowd so they give her space. He lifts her and holds her against his side with one arm and something in him weeps, feels something soft in him as her tiny weight settles and she starts chattering at him about the groceries she and her mother came to buy.

They weave their way through the marketplace as they help each other--she tells him where he can find what he needs, and he silently curses the nords and their height as he tries to peer over shoulders to catch a glimpse of the woman she described--and that cold weight that's usually settled in his chest, his grief and remorse, lightens with every step. She's warm through his sweater and splutters indignantly every time the ever changing wind blows her brown hair into her mouth and he laughs, quiet and warm.

They check places she's already been, in case her mother doubled back looking for her, and take detours so Celann can fumble to place newly acquired groceries in the bag beneath her, unwilling to hold her over the side with his axe and equally unwilling to put her down, awkwardly shifting her weight as she laughs at him. He's silly for buying such expensive things, she tells him, and he light heartedly tells her Skyrim is silly for not having the things he used to use in High Rock. The revelation he hasn't always lived in Skyrim excites her to no end, and the rest of the trip is a Q&A of the sort only a small child can provide.

He feels warm inside, in his chest, where usually he feels vaguely cold at best, and for a moment he's reluctant to relinquish her when they finally find her mother, guided by the sounds of panicked calls of her name. There's a fond sadness as he sets her down on the stones again, and the woman looks at him oddly for a moment before the look turns knowing, though he's sure the conclusion she reached is slightly off.

She quietly asks if her daughter reminds him of her. He stands there silently for a moment, looking down at the little girl as she rifles through the things her mother's found.

He tells her yes.

[heir-of-the-chair]

I DO NOT. HAVE TIME. FOR A NEW HYPERFIXATION. I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS.

[altruistic-meme]

love being logged out of my workplace portal and not knowing my fucking password or pin. what the FUCK did i change it to??????

[polysyndetonaddictsupportgroup]

if toji suddenly reincarnated back into ssg, how would each character react? like obvi gojo would try to hollow purple him on sight but he manages to hold himself back to get some answers from toji instead. do the others know that it was bc of toji that megumi is stuck in the situation he’s in rn? would megumi even want to talk to his dad?

and how would toji take finding out how the zenin treated his son? he thought that he’d be safe and happy there and then he finds out what they did to megumi and that it was gojo and co who stopped it.

Everyone knows that Toji sold megumi to the zenin.

I think it actually really bothers Megumi how it’s common knowledge. He doesn’t know anything about his own father other than he sold him, and that’s not even private to him. He’s just some unwanted kid who his dad only had to sell like prized cattle.

It was never a secret that Toji sold him to the Zenin. Maki knew, and she already told the others when giving them the rundown on what happened. They’d all know that toji’s the reason megumi’s stuck in this situation.

The second years:

It depends on when he arrived. If it’s when Yuuta still hasn’t gotten the RCT backlash under control, then he may have to worry a bit about the power of love and also this sword.

He’d survive. Not unscathed. But he’d survive.

If it’s after Yuuta’s gotten control, Yuuta still would hate him, but he wouldn’t be as proactive about it. Mostly because Megumi would feel weird about him making a fuss. He’d intervene every time Toji tried to talk to Megumi if Megumi established he didn’t want to talk to him. He’d try to quietly get him the fuck out of there. He'd radiate an aura of murder whenever Toji came close.

Maki would ice Toji out on principle. Like, she’d hate that she had to. Toji’s supposed to be the only one who understands her. They’re both Zenin clan rejects. They both were hurt in such similar ways.

But only one of them sold their fucking kid back into that hellhole, and that ended with Megumi in a hospital bed. She’d be bitter, internally, that she couldn’t try for something like a relationship with Toji. She’d wonder if she betrayed Mai the same way he betrayed Megumi. She wouldn’t outwardly react to him. She’d ice him out.

Inumaki and Panda would embark on a quest to ruin his fucking life. They’d short sheet his bed. They’d put itching powder in his pants. They’d put bleach in his shampoo. All would fail, but this would not discourage them.

The adults:

Gojo would bend over backwards to keep Toji away from Megumi.

Gojo's playing the game of "only let Megumi get information he can physically handle" right now. that's why he's refusing to let Maki tell him the truth about the Ten Shadows. He knows his kid. He knows Megumi's impossibly fucked up and is not going to tell them how badly or ask for help for what happened. He knows Megumi's going to break if anything else happens, and he knows that Toji showing up out of nowhere and dropping six bombshells on him is not something Megumi could handle. He'd squeeze Toji for insider information on the Zenin and threaten to punt Toji to the moon if he didn't stay the fuck away.

Toji would not be impressed by the threats.

Nanami and Shoko would refuse to have anything to do with him. Shoko wouldn’t speak to him. Nanami would, but only to inform him that his sole priorities are the wellbeing of his family, and that Megumi has a right to speak with Toji if he so wishes, but if he doesn't, toji needs to steer far clear of him. He's done enough. toji may have been his father biologically, but Nanami was the one who carried him home--twice--after the family Toji sold him to broke him to the point he was close to death. Nanami has been there for the parent teacher conferences and the nightmares and all the shit Toji never even tried to be there for even when he had a chance. Toji surrendered his place in Megumi's life, and it's been filled. And Toji should not dare to try and hurt nanami's family again. He's already done enough.

Megumi:

Megumi hates him. And he wouldn’t want to talk to him.

Megumi never talks about his dad. If someone asked, he’d say he doesn’t care about him, didn’t expect better from him, and doesn’t care that toji sold him. It’s hard to be hurt by someone you never expected to love you. He’s not surprised; he’s not disappointed; this is just his dad being on brand. He was a piece of shit before and a piece of shit now.

He’d be lying.

His dad selling him to the Zenin cut megumi deeper than anything else in his life. The zenin were always his abusers. But Toji was supposed to be his dad. He was supposed to take care of him.

He was supposed to love him. And a part of megumi has never been able to understand why he didn’t.

In megumi’s mind, he had to have known what pieces of shit the Zenin were, and he sent him there anyway. And Megumi hates him for it, he really does.

I guess it really depends on when in the sgg timeline it is. Like, are we dropping him right in the middle of the currently chapter?

Megumi would assume he’s a hallucination. He’d think his brain would be just fucking with him and making it all hurt more. It would make him violently upset, and Toji would have to be removed from the room, and Gojo would probably have to knock Megumi out to get him to calm down again.

If he’s gotten better, then Toji would still make him violently upset. But he’d be aware enough to hide how much.

He’d refuse to see him. He’d refuse to talk to him. He wouldn’t want to be in the same room as him. His dad couldn’t be fucked to ever be there for him, so Megumi doesn’t see why he should drop everything to see him now.

Megumi's not in a mindset where he could ever healthily see Toji, coming right off SGGs. like, he's traumatized out of his fucking mind. He's absolutely unable to handle the added stress of his deadbeat dad coming back to life and wanting to chat.

Toji:

Toji would kill all of them.

The thing is, I don't think Toji actually thought Megumi would be safe and happy with the Zenin. I think that's the lie he told himself to justify selling his son to his abusers. Like, he knows his family's cruelty better than anyone. He knows that even if you have cursed energy, they're not exactly tender parents.

I think he was just in a spiral, struggling with a gambling addiction, and was trying to take an easy way out and lying to himself about what exactly he was doing to his son.

He'd feel like shit over it, the confirmation that he son could be literally the most important person for hundreds of years to the zenin and they'd still hurt him. He'd kill them for putting Megumi in the hospital bed, for hurting him all those years ago. He wouldn't know how to begin fixing things with his son, so he'd do what he knows how to do, which is just fucking kill the people who hurt him to begin with.

[player-tag]

i just realised we're probably going to have to see the final problem as an episode on the podcast. we might have to hear john cry. we're probably going to deal with that.

[flowerflamestars]

Timeloop au snippet

A scarce half hour later, Lucien’s morning had wrapped right around itself to the same exact problem. Again, between the abject falsehood of Nesta’s fragile mortal body, and Tamlin, right on the edge of something ruinous. He was staring at the blood on her hands. Not all faeries bled red- even to the human eye there was a distinction in shades. Some fae, born of just enough Spring in them, bled like tree sap, gleaming sticky gold. Thin. Dripping from the white strain of Nesta’s knuckles, a sort of uneasy mixed pink of muddled High Fae heritage. “What,” Tamlin snapped, cold, cold, and faraway, “In the name of all your damned mortal gods, do you think you’re doing?” The game was already up. The game was just beginning, another life, another moment, Nesta’s beautiful face set in a truth she could not entirely act away. Lucien’s heart might have given out, in sheer unremitting fondness. If he wasn’t sick on the grass first. “You promised,” Nesta’s human voice still cut, but she was trying, almost making it, to something softer. Quieter. “You promised. Faeries cannot break their vows, even I know that.” “Tam,” Lucien tried, nausea filling his throat. “You said,” Nesta continued, like he hadn’t spoken at all, “No one would harm him. No harm. How are any of us to survive what it so come if we are not even safe from- from”- Finally, belatedly, Tamlin looked from the wet brick in her hand, yanked from an ancient folly wall, to the crumbled, caved in, blue figure between them. 

[theshadowrealmitself]

I had. a horrible fucking nightmare last night. it felt like goddamn sleep paralysis, it felt like I was actually laying in my bed watching my door, and a hooded person slowly entered my room while I couldn’t move or do anything, and then they fucking launched themself at me and I woke up actually screaming for help and fighting off a nonexistent enemy

I didn’t even feel the shift between waking and dreaming, it just felt like I was actually awake the whole time, I was shaking until I passed out again

[seafoam-taide]

...what.... what the fuck has happened in rwby now... what. What?