#LIKE I MEAN IT I'LL DROP WHAT I'M DOING AND JUST EDIT IT OUT ;;;

[loganlermanstanaccount]

Show me where it hurts (part 1)

Miguel O'Hara x spiderwoman!reader

(AO3 Mirror), Part 2, Main Masterlist

summary: Miguel's acting weird, and you make it your mission to find out exactly what's going on.

warnings: no warnings for this chap, pg-13, swearing and canon level violence. smut next chapter xoxo

a/n: this is a combination of 2 asks and this post I saw on here a while ago: flirty/ snarky fem reader, Miguel during a ""rut"" (I don't know if it counts as a rut really, but its to do with his animal instincts/DNA) and Lyla playing matchmaker.  I had so much fun writing this, enjoy :D

(i wrote this pre seeing spiderverse 2, so i think characterisation is a little off, esp for Lyla, apologies! I'll fix it in my upcoming fics)

edit: I use the term "bichita" which I have been informed can be read not as I intended in Spanish. I'm not a native speaker so I want to apologise in advance. I'm doing more research for my future fics and leaving this up as a testament to my stupidity. Spanish speakers, feel free to correct me / clown my ass in the comments. My bad guys :(

wc: 3.6k

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

You think Miguel is avoiding you. 

One of your closest friends, giving you the runaround for months, it seems. Calling the two of you close friends is a little extreme, sure. You've only known O'Hara for two years, and been in love with him for slightly less than that, thank you very much. And yes, he refuses to call you by anything but your last name. And the last time you saw him he wouldn't so much as look at you, but that was besides the point. 

"..the point," You tell Lyla, in between exasperated bites of cereal, "... is that aren't elite forces of spiderpeople supposed to, you know, have some spiderpeople kick ass once in a while? And where exactly is our fearless leader? I haven't seen O'Hara's scary ass in weeks, and I'm starting to miss it."

She gives you a look, one that says this isn't what I'm programmed for , but you pointedly ignore it. 

"His ass, by the way." You clarify. "I very specifically miss his ass. Remind me to get his routine. I know girls that would kill for…"

"How the fuck did you get in here?" A voice croaks. You turn behind you and see Miguel, not in his suit, but wrapped up in a blanket like he's just woken up. And he looks rough, like a train ran him over on the way here: puffy eyes, splotchy skin, tension kneaded into his brow. 

"Wow." Your spoon drops into the milk. "You look like shit.." 

He furrows his brow even deeper, if that was possible. " Mierda. You shouldn't be here." 

"This isn't quite the welcome party I was expecting, man. I'm the only one to actually turn up to one of your meetings, and this is what I get?" 

"I thought I told Lyla to cancel," He mutters, pinching the bridge of his nose. 

"Cancel? Since when do you miss a chance to talk about rules and protocol?" 

"I don't have time for this-" 

"-and I'm not leaving without a proper explanation. Is everything okay?" 

"It's actually way worse now you're here." He deadpans. 

"Haha ." You turn to Lyla. "You drop everything to travel halfway across the multiverse and this asshole won't even say thanks." 

"Thanks, but this asshole needs you to leave. Now." 

This is the most he's spoken to you in forever, and you hate that you like it. You just want his attention, however it comes. If that means dragging this out so maybe he acknowledges you, touches you, looks at you - then so be it. Squinting, you get closer to him. You scan his face for anything to latch onto. You put a hand on his shoulder, still searching. 

"You sure you're alright? You know you can tell me if-" 

"Si, si." He grits his teeth, looking away. "M'just fine. I'll explain…. later."

"...because I'm your right hand man?" You grin, poking at his brow. "Stop frowning so much Miguel, you're gonna ruin that pretty face of yours."

He flushes, nervous, and swats you away. "-what? N-No. You're not my right hand man and I like my face just the way it is. Now, leave. "

Making your way to the door, you tap your nose teasingly. "You know where to find me!" 

When the door closes with a click, you make your way down the corridor, and stop in your tracks when you hear it. It's muffled, but with the strain of your supersenses you can make out Miguel's voice just beyond the wall. 

"I just…. don't want her to see me like this… Lyla, it's not happening… I can't tell her…." Tell her what, exactly? 

Resolutely, you make up your mind. Miguel O'Hara's got a secret. And before you leave for home, you're gonna do everything in your God given power to wear him down and find out. 

~~~

Despite his insistence otherwise, you liked to think of yourself as O'Hara's right hand man - and most of the other spiderpeople thought so too. You were one of the very first he recruited, after crash landing onto your earth like a spiderman-shaped meteor; the two of you were inseparable. Miguel was stubborn and headstrong and thought he was right all the time. Infuriatingly, he was, but that didn't stop you from telling him to get his head out of his own ass when his ego grew too big. 

He was different around you, you think. Softer, sometimes. Harsher, other times. He told you what you needed to hear whether you wanted to or not; the result of mutual respect and agonising persistence. Slowly, you had chipped away his hard exterior; the one he built because he thought he needed to push people away. In that regard, you were similar, but this need manifested in you like a weed - an awful, awful compulsion to joke and laugh at your own expense, to keep others at an arm's length. You had spent your whole life picking and pruning away at yourself, looking for perfection. Even after all this, multiverse-hopping and fighting alongside people who were the closest things you had to friends , it wasn't enough. There was still something missing. 

Ironically, Miguel had told you something similar the one of the last times you had spoken. You had fucked up a mission, well and truly. In the aftermath, all you can remember is coming back to base, limping on Jessica's arm. 

"She's hurt!" She cries out. Lyla materialises and leads you both to the med bay, inspecting any visible wounds. There's a deep laceration, sticky with blood, at the base of your stomach. You shift onto the bed and hiss with pain. 

Miguel is quick to follow, face twisted with confusion, pain, sadness. Even in your haze, you feel the tension radiating off of him as he drags over a cart of supplies. 

"What happened?" He strains. 

"I don't even… it happened so fast. We got ambushed, and all of a sudden I'm on the ground. I wasn't thinking straight and… " She sobs. "...she jumped in front of me. God, she saved my life-" 

"-wasn't your fault, Jess." You croak, trying to sit up. "And I'm fine. Just need to walk it off…"

"Sit, bichita," His nickname makes you frown, despite yourself, and you settle back down. "Lyla, what's the damage?"

Your vision goes spotty, and Lyla's voice barely registers. All you can feel is searing pain in your side, but Miguel is warm, oh so warm. You clutch his arms, and force him to look you in the eye. 

"M'ready, Miguel." He nods weakly, but you don't think he understands. "I mean it . I can lead, j-just need another chance and I won't let you down… Jess, tell him that I can-" 

"It's okay. I believe you. You just need to relax for me, hmm?" He clutches at your hand, tight, and it's like you're the only two people in the world. "You did good. I promise."

Faintly, you nod. You feel a pinch at your arm, and Jessica's there, with an empty vial of something in her hands. The pain washes over you, and you fight to keep your eyes open. In those last few moments of light, you swear you feel a shaky kiss pressed to your temple. 

"Sleep, mi bichito amoroso. Sleep."

When you come to, you're still in the medbay, moonlight streaming through. Well, artificial moonlight. Time worked a little differently here, something Miguel explained to you a while ago - God knows what about dilation and quantum interference. It makes you smile now, remembering his frustration as he tried to explain to no avail. You were the only spiderman this side of the multiverse without a degree in quantum tech, you had said with a lopsided smile. 

You move to sit, and pain shoots up your side. Groaning, you push through it, determined to get out of this bed and find the others. As if on cue, Miguel walks in, almost leaping towards you. 

"You should… mierda ! You should be resting in bed."

You pout as you stumble into his chest. He hooks an arm around you and leads you back. You clamber in, sighing. "M'fine, O'Hara."

"Your guts were halfway out of your body less than 24 hours ago. So stay put, or you might give me another heart attack."

You scoff, incredulous. "You were worried?" 

He shrugs. " 'Course I was."

"Why? You know I'm practically indestructible." You give him a shit eating grin, and poke the frown appearing at his brow. He doesn't bat you away like he usually does. 

"Famous last words, bichita." He sighs. You can't speak a lick of Spanish, but you know he only calls you that word when you've frustrated him to his limit. So you take it as a win, for now. 

He drops into the chair next to you. "How are you feeling?" 

"Just peachy, dollface." You wink, and he doesn't so much as groan. 

"I'm being serious. You went through something pretty traumatic…"

"You want me to tell you it hurts, so, so bad, daddy? " You pout and flutter your eyelashes mockingly. Miguel shifts in his seat, unable to make eye contact. 

"That's not what I meant."

"What did you mean, O'Hara? I feel fine. And in a couple of days, I'll feel even better, and I'll be up and about. I can finish what we started and-" 

"-no, absolutely not." He frowns. "A couple of days? I'm sending you home-" 

"You can't do that! On whose fucking authority?"

"On the authority of you almost fucking died ! Keeping you safe is our priority right now-" 

"God, is this my punishment? This is a low blow, O'Hara. You know how hard I've worked for this: months of surveillance and intel a-and I did everything by the book, just like you told me to." You croak. "I fucked up . I know that, and I feel terrible. Give me a chance to make things right; that's all I'm asking. I can do it, I know it. "

He looks at you for a moment, something heavy in his expression. His face contorted, he strips you down to the bone with just his gaze. His voice is so quiet, you almost miss it. 

"....you're still trying to prove yourself, aren't you?"

Honestly, it catches you off guard. You don't even know what the fuck that means, let alone why he said it.

"I don't… I d-don't…?" 

"They all love you. Respect you. More than me I think, sometimes." He chuckles at that. "You're good at what you do. The best . What else are you trying to prove? What else do you need ?" 

Your throat goes dry. You couldn't speak if you wanted to. 

"I'm not punishing you. You made a mistake, but you don't need to be crucified for it. I just want to keep you safe. I can't… we can't lose you."

"Miguel-"

"-this isn't a discussion. And I'm not trying to argue, although I know how much you like to argue." He inches closer, cupping your face gently. You try to move away, blinking back tears. But his hands are steady and he strokes your jaw with so much tenderness you think you hear your heart break. He's pretty, so pretty. You don't deserve him, you think. "There'll be time to fight, bichita. Rest. That's your mission right now."

"C-can't sleep." You breathe. "It hurts." 

Miguel pauses, head tilted like he's thinking. He taps your shoulder. "Scoot over."

You do as he says, and he slips into the bed with you. It's a tight fit, but he manages, placing you on his chest with an arm gently around your shoulders. You bury your face in his hoodie, sniffling and hoping he doesn't notice you choking back sobs. Absentmindedly, he settles into a rhythm, gentle breathing and playing with your hair, soothing you softly. He pretends he can't hear the tears. 

"M'gonna stay here until you're asleep. For as long as you need."

You nod, unable to speak for fear of breaking down. 

~~~

The days after felt like a blur. You woke up to Miguel gone, and an ache in your heart. Jess visits as much as she can, and Ben calls you a couple times, to see if you're okay. Peter B brings Mayday, and she clambers all over your bed, bringing some life into the room. Miguel doesn't visit per se - you hear whispers of him, Lyla visiting in his stead for comprehensive status updates. Once, you wake up in the night to see him on the adjacent chair, head lolling in deep sleep. He looks peaceful, calm - one of the first times you haven't seen his brow furrowed with worry. Of course, he's gone by the morning. 

The very last time you saw him, he opened the portal home. It was weird, after everything, but if Miguel felt the same you wouldn't know. Talking at a thousand miles a minute, he alternates between assuring you they'll be fine without you and situation reports from spider people all across the multiverse. Things you'd missed whilst bedbound, asking for advice before you left. He trusted your judgement and the thought warmed your heart, almost making you forget that he completely brushed past the previous nights before. 

You still remember the last thing he had said to you, which would've been weeks ago, now. 

"...and if you need anything, and I mean anything, you call me directly. Not Jess, not Ben, and certainly not Peter B. Call me, and I'll answer, I promise. You need help, you need advice, you just need someone to talk to, then-"

"-I call you. I get it, O'Hara. Will do." He opens the portal, watching as you walk towards it. He can't take his eyes off of you, even though you can't see him. At the last moment you turn, and run towards him. You almost knock him over with a hug. Burying his head in the crook of your shoulder, he hugs you back, ever careful of your injury. Separating, your smile almost knocks him over again. Weakly, he smiles back as you head through the portal, back home. 

You're left with that feeling, of his arms around your body - warm, so warm - as you putter about by the switchboard. After careful deliberation (you were really, really bored ) you'd taken to manage the Multi Modal Multiversal Switchboard - as aptly named by Miguel. Everyone else called it the Big Red Phone of course, but he had insisted on calling it by its proper name . Every. Time. 

The thought makes you chuckle as you call up Peter B. His icon flashes on the screen in front of you. With a click, he picks up the call, his face materialising holographically in front you. A little hand reaches up and tugs at his ear. 

"Ow… ouch … Dad's on the phone, honey."

"Aww! How's my favourite Parker doing?" 

"Not bad, actually! MJ just made us probably the best burger this side of New York-"

"-sorry, Peter? Me and May are trying to have a conversation." You hear her giggle in the background. Her gap toothed grin pops into frame and she babbles excitedly. "...yeah, exactly May. That's literally what I said."

"Okay, okay, that's enough." He puts the toddler down and watches her scurry away. "You're feeling better, I see."

"Yeah, back in action. Thought I'd check in."

"All good here." He squints, trying to take in your surroundings. "You're at HQ?" 

You hum.

"Could've sworn Lyla cancelled…"

"Yeah, didn't get the memo. But I think something's wrong with O'Hara."

He gives you a weird look. "Uhhh, what makes you think that?" 

"He won't even look at me. Was it something I said? Something I did?" Your eyes narrow. "...what do you know, Peter?"

"Nothing! Absolutely nothing!" He scoffs, a little too quickly, clutching his chest like you've offended him. He's stared down some of the scariest villains around, but the look you give him is truly chilling. "Just… uhhh. You didn't hear this from me." 

"Naturally…"

"We tracked 'em down, the guys that ambushed you and Jessica."

"The Sinister Six? From Earth-215?"

"Yeah, but by the time we got there, it was just Kraven and some of his goons. Miguel got there first, and…." He gulps. "He was pissed. Trashed the whole place looking for the rest of 'em. Beat Kraven half to death and we had to pull him off."

"Shit."

"Yeah, it was pretty rough. Never seen him like that before. And just generally? He'd been weirdly quiet, a little grumpy, more aggressive on missions. I don't know what's gotten into him."

"Hmmm. Thanks, Pete."

"No problem, sweetheart. And if the big guy asks… "

"...this didn't come from you, I know." Weakly, you smile. "Say hi to my favourite Parkers, for me." 

" 'Course I will. We should celebrate, if you're back officially. Mine and MJ's is always open."

"Good to know. I'll see you around."

He waves goodbye, and the hologram clicks off. Sighing, you try to piece together what you've just heard. 

Miguel: acting weird. Well, you knew that already. Aggressive was new. And Lyla? She had canceled, but not for you, for some reason. An honest mistake, perhaps. But Lyla doesn't make mistakes… 

You stew for a couple of hours, puttering about the switchboard, twiddling your thumbs. Something's wrong, and for some reason you're afraid to see him. To have him look straight through you, again, when you ask to do the same. Show me where it hurts. Tell me how to make it better.  

On the way there, you chew your lip in anticipation. In the corridor, you're outside the door to his place, hand hovering above the door. To knock, to call. In the harsh fluorescent light, you hesitate. 

"Lyla?" Nervously, you sink down onto the floor. It's hard to explain, but you don't expect her to actually come; to materialise in front of you. 

"How can I assist you?" She says with a ding. 

"Uhh… hi. Just wanted to talk." You pause, clicking your tongue. "Can you be honest with me?" 

"I can only be honest with you. It is not in my programming to lie, unless specified by my owner."

"Sure. Cool. It's about him, actually. Is Miguel okay?" 

She tilts her head, as if processing your request. "Okay is a subjective term. Is Mr O'Hara alive? Yes. Is Mr O'Hara physically well? Yes. By those terms, he is okay ."

Too vague for your own liking. "I guess I meant more… his emotional state. To the best of your knowledge… in your opinion , Lyla: is Miguel okay?" 

"...I believe Mr O'Hara is experiencing some emotional turmoil."

You frown. "Oh. Do you know why?" 

"Mr O'Hara has instructed me not to disclose that information with you."

"Fair enough. But you don't have to tell me… I could just ask questions?" 

She nods. "There is nothing in my programming that prevents me from answering some questions within certain parameters." 

"Did I do something? Not just today but… last time I was here. Did I say something to hurt or upset him? Is that why he's acting weird?"

"No." She says blankly. "And yes. I suppose it is… complicated." She gestures around that word. 

"I'm a little confused, Lyla."

She sits next to you, on the cool tile. Not that she could feel it, but it feels more intimate - like two friends talking. The extent of Lyla's consciousness, you weren't sure of. Was she alive? To you, she might as well be. Could she think, feel, emote? Maybe, maybe not. You weren't smart enough to understand the nuances of her programming. But you were human enough to see it in her - something glittering beyond the surface. 

It could be projection, but you swear her voice is softer. "He has a name for you. When he speaks about you, and to you. I have it logged in my memory database. Do you know what that is?" You shake your head. 

Lyla opens up her palm and projects videos and images - little Miguel's popping up in her palm, tinny and gruff voices ringing through the hallway. They say your name, shout your name, whisper it. Some say other things in Spanish. Curse words had always been your assumption, and he had given you no reason to think otherwise. Now, having it played back to you, you hear a tenderness in his voice you would've missed. Words and phrases that come up again and again…

"Bichita." She repeats. "Bichito del amor. Mi bichito amoroso. "

You shake your head, still confounded. "...I don't speak Spanish, Lyla." 

"Little bug. Sweetheart. Lovebug. My little lovebug." She clears her throat. "I believe they are terms of endearment."

Steadfast, she directs you towards her palm. Another small Miguel appears, and you think it's him from this morning. 

"I thought I told you not to let anyone in, Lyla?" 

"I did not let her in. She let herself in using the code you previously gave her, Mr O'Hara."

"Yeah, for emergencies. Fuck. Mi bichita, too smart for her own good."

"...If you are in distress, I believe she would understand, Mr O'Hara."

"I just think it's too much. I don't want her to see me like this." 

"According to Alchemax files, previous subjects showing this kind of aggression benefitted from-"

"Lyla, it's not happening, no chance. I can't tell her."

The figure blinks out of her palm. "Mr O'Hara has forbid me from telling you about certain things."

"...but not from showing me." Your eyes meet hers. You give her a watery smile. "Thank you." 

With a hint of a smile, she nods and is gone from the corridor. You are left alone, with nothing but your thoughts of little lovebugs rattling around in your brain.

_

_

_

[queers-gambit]

Opening Night and Open Hearts

prompt: opening night - a mother's fear, a locked walk-in freezer, confessions through a thick metal door, questioning what's deserved, and a proposal at The Bear after hours.

pairing: Carmen 'Carmy' Berzatto x female!reader

fandom masterlist: FX's The Bear

word count: 9.8k+

note: i think i give enough background for you guys to feel as if you don't need to read any other relating works, but i linked the fics that could be read as a small series (maybe?) also let author be lonely in peace

warnings: reader nicknamed Peach, established relationship, cursing, spoilers, fluff, angst, relationship angst, hurt and comfort, Carmy still (desperately) needs a nap, depiction of physical illness, boys are dumb and emotions are hard, reader-insert, depiction of toxic family, OC Carmy that grovels a lot, not edited!

⚠️ season two, episode ten spoilers

not necessary to read, but other relating works with Peach:

Dinner at the Homesick Restaurant

God's Plan part two: Two to Tango

Neon Sticky Notes

"Hi, yes, I can hear you - sorry about that, I was just making note of your reservation," you spoke smoothly into the phone, trying not to ogle your boyfriend wrapped in only a clean blue towel. "So, that's a party of four for Monsieur Claude Badeaux - all right, that's so lovely. I'm obligated to remind everyone that tonight's opening is a fine dining experience and the proper, corresponding dress code is being asked for. Are there any allergies I should make note of for your party?"

"Jean Paul has a tree nut allergy," you were told.

"All right, that's noted and highlighted: Jean Paul has a tree nut allergy. If there's anything else I could help you with?"

"Non," he chuckled. "I was surprised to see your invitation to this evening, though, mon cher. It's been so long, yes?"

"Well, it was my pleasure to extend the offer, we're ecstatic by your reservation," you chuckled. "We'll see you tonight, Monsieur, and should you need anything before then, you may call this number again."

You said your parting words in French, smiling at Carmy when you hung up and dropped your work phone. "Did I hear that correct?" Your lover asked with a broad grin, "Was that...?"

"Senior marketing advisor at The Washington Post?" You filled in for him. "Uh, yeah, I think it was, but you know me - I could be wrong."

"You invited someone from The Washington Post to the opening tonight?"

"Is that okay?" You asked, standing from the bed after making note in your datebook. "You look kinda - I don't know, shocked?"

"I-I am," he blinked at you, watching you gather his pristine clothing to hang on the closet door. "But in a good way - I can't believe you did this," he chuckled, wiping his mouth. "I mean - holy shit, Peaches."

You offered a toothy grin, "Figured I could pull a few of my own strings to help get the word out about your love-child."

This made Carmy snicker, "Hey, now. Tonight's important, don't make fun."

"I know," you nodded, leading him back into the bathroom to view your hair products. "Which is why I invited some important people and some not-so important people. I know this is serious, Carmy," you smiled at him, hoping to convey your support, "and I wanted to help in whatever way I could."

"You being there tonight is more than I could ask for," he chuckled, helping you onto the small bathroom counter. You squirted a bit of hair product in your hand, watching him flinch back a little, "Uh, I just don't want my hair greasy, Peach, you know? Not a good look and I'll sweat it out in the kitchen."

"I feel like I should be offended by you having no trust in me," you teased, insisting, "I know whatcha need, baby, lemme help."

Carmy smiled softly and held still, letting you run your hands through his curls to push everything back and away from his forehead in a stylish but manageable "do". There was a silent, serene moment as you and Carmy just existed together in a mundane space, his big, sad eyes watching your face as you worked. He wondered, "Think tonight's gonna be okay?"

"I think tonight's gonna be more than okay," you assured softly. "I think tonight's gonna go better than you're anticipating."

He sighed and planted his hands on either side of you, suddenly dropping his gaze. "I, uh... Sugar invited Mom t'tonight..."

"Yeah, I know."

"You know?"

"Sugar and I are still friends outside of us dating, Carmy," you smiled patiently, slowing your hands so you more toyed with his curls; pushing some strands behind his ears. "She needs someone as much as you do and I don't mind."

"But isn't that what Pete's for?"

"Yes, but you know, Pete's Pete."

Carmy snorted, "Yeah, yeah, good point."

"I don't know if she'll show up tonight, Bear, but whether she does or doesn't, it won't matter - you're not doing this for her. This is for you, Carmy, tonight's about The Bear opening - it's about you and this incredible, amazing thing you've done. Okay?" You caressed both his cheeks in your hands so he could only look at you directly. "If she shows, that's great," you whispered with a soft smile as your thumbs swept the apples of his cheeks, "and if she doesn't, it won't make tonight any less special. That, I can promise."

Carmy's forehead met yours, both pausing to breathe together; peace always a fleeting feeling as of late and being something you both capitalized on. You brought him in closer for an embrace, his face burying in your neck as your arms snaked around his to keep him as close as possible. His arms were tight around your waist, legs spread to accommodate him; both needing the feel of being close before that night's inevitable stressful event.

"Wow, well, don't you look all pretty! Wow, Peach," Pete greeted you when you scurried to the table with your friend in tow. "Oh, hi there!"

"Pete, this is my best friend, Danielle, and Dani, this is Pete, Sugar's husband."

"Hi, it's really nice to meet you," your friend greeted, the two instantly chattering as they both just blew past their introductions to instantly compliment one another's clothes. You smirked, knowing they'd get along famously, and looked around the brand new, packed restaurant.

"Hey, there she is, my pretty girl," Richie greeted smoothly, approaching your standing form to slide his hand around your shoulders.

"Hi, Cousin," you beamed, offering him a hug in greeting. "The place looks fantastic - it's so - I mean - just wow, Richie," you complimented. "You guys did such an amazing job. I need to tell Fak, too, this is - you guys should be so proud, it looks incredible. Hardly can believe what it was before this."

"It really is something, huh?" He grinned. "Hey, Pete," he nodded.

"Hey, Richie."

"And you must be the famous, the fabulous Miss Danielle?"

"That's me," your friend grinned. "You're Richie, right? Carmy's cousin who's not really a cousin but is as good as blood?"

"Yes, ma'am, the very same," he nodded with pride. "We've some drinks coming your way in just a moment, but I need to borrow Peach for just one second."

"Why do they call her Peach?" Dani asked, but Richie was leading you away as Pete was heard answering,

"Oh, because she mastered this peach cobbler with Carmy's mom, Donna, and she started the nickname..."

"What's wrong?" You asked softly with a smile as to not give the illusion to others that you were worried. "What can I do to help?"

"No, no, nothing too bad, you were just requested by the Frenchie-French guy."

"Oh, right, that's right, yeah, I can help with that," you sighed gently, smiling as you approached the table. Greeting the two men and women was easy, Richie impressed by your connections in the professional world. Tonight, The Washington Post didn't just dine with them - no, it was also the director of social media for three luxury, designer brands: Jean-Paul.

Yes, the man was so elusive that he just went by Jean-Paul. Fuck a last name!

Either way, it impressed Richie to hear the introductions. The two women were executives in their own companies, names Richie didn't catch because he was busy taking note of the way Mr. Frenchie-French was basically eye fucking you in front of them all.

"Well," Richie smiled stiffly, "tonight's incredibly special for us. In fact, uh, Y/N's boyfriend is the owner and head chef."

"Really?" Frenchie-French perked his brows, shifting his gaze over to you. "You always had a soft spots for chefs, non? For those who were versed in the culinary arts?"

"Well, mostly I appreciated a man in the kitchen simply because I burn water and would probably unintentionally starve myself," you teased easily, deflecting the man's subtle dig. "I'm actually here with family tonight, so, please, ladies and gentlemen, enjoy tonight - I know I'm biased when I say the food is exceptional, but I look forward to your own opinions."

"We will talk later, mon cher, I am sure there will be plenty to discuss," the Frenchman promised, kissing the back of your hand as you let Richie lead you away by your free hand.

You released a long sigh, muttering, "Bring them a bottle of real champagne, please, Richie, I had a few bottles imported just for them. Listen closely," you lowered your voice as you both paused on the side of the dining room, "bring them a bowl of thin sliced strawberries sprinkled in sugar and pop the cork at their table - it's impressive for whatever reason."

Richie pecked your temple and gave you a tight squeeze, "I got it all covered, girly. You all right? Look like you're gonna be sick?"

"Just men being men grosses me out, I guess," you sighed with a small shrug. "He's always had a thing for me, I figured I'd use that to get him here tonight - Carmy's work speaks for itself, but maybe he'd be inclined to publish an article or two for us if I play nice."

Richie paused you a few feet from your table, complimenting, "I hope Carmy knows he doesn't deserve you, Peach."

"You said years ago neither of us did," you smirked gently. "Said I wasn't relationship material, right? Remember?"

"I was wrong," he nodded. "I even said y'all would never be serious, but..." He scoffed to himself, "I've never seen that boy so crazy about anyone in his life. You've really changed him, Peach. I don't really know how to thank you."

"You can start by buttering up those flirty Frenchmen," you teased, giving his cheek a peck.

"On it," he winked, parting from your side.

Inside the kitchen some twenty minutes later, Richie approached Carmy, directing his attention, "Cousin?"

"Yo."

"Peach is on 17 with Pete."

"Okay."

"Go say hi."

"Yeah, eventually," Carmy nodded absently, never halting his work.

"Eventually?" Richie repeated with distain, something in his stomach twisting.

"Where the fuck is Josh!?" Carmy called into the kitchen, another chef echoing his concerns.

"Yo!" Richie barked as calmly as he could, "Just go say hi to your girl, Cousin."

"Yo, I'll go when I have a minute," Carmy deflected strongly. "I'm in the fuckin' shit, leave me the fuck alone."

"What? I'm saying - "

"I'll get there when I can get there!"

"I'm saying!"

"What?" Carmy barked.

"She's got important fucking people in that dining room, man," Richie scoffed, hands held up in defense. "Just for your ungrateful ass! Maybe the least you can do is go say fuckin' hi - even if you're fuckin' busy. She knows that, it'd be a nice gesture - or whatever fuckin' shit - I don't know! She's your girl!"

"Yeah! Exactly!" Carmy barked. "She's my fuckin' girl, she knows the fuckin' drill, I'll go say fuckin' hi when I get the fuckin' chance, Richie! Fuck's sake! Always tryna meddle and shit!"

"Jesus, fuck," Richie sighed, turning out of the kitchen with his hands waving Carmy off in defeat.

You were none the wiser, entertained by Pete and Dani's gabbing as Sugar was in-and-out, dealing with all the little things going wrong. These little things came to her in the form of notes left at the table subtly for her to go solve, you wanting to help but being shot down every time. Eventually, Carmy was approaching your table with a tray of food, shocking you slightly.

"Hey, Peach," He greeted softly, lowering the tray to balance on the table and lean over to kiss your cheek. "You look gorgeous, baby, wow," he complimented in a whisper, offering another quick kiss.

"Thank you, Chef," you smiled brightly, touching his forearm in a sign of affection. "What's all this you've got for us?"

He hummed and explained what he set on the table in front of you guys; eyes alight and cheeks flushed from the heat of the kitchen. He poured whatever sauce came with the main dish, smiling at Dani, nodding to Pete, then looking to you.

"I'll check on you later, all right, baby?" He mumbled, watching you nod. "I gotta get back," he whispered, "but thank you for being here, my pretty girl."

"No where else I'd rather be, Cream," you rushed, letting his lips find yours briefly.

"Stick around after, would you? When we close, just... Don't leave yet."

"Yes, Chef," you whispered against his lips with a grin. He gave one single more kiss before pulling away to stand upright.

"Enjoy," he bid the table before walking away.

"So, like," Dani trailed after making sure Carmy was out of earshot, "when's the wedding? 'Cause that might've been the cutest thing I've seen. I mean, opening night, he's cooking, but paused to come serve us? Serve you? And he's so soft with you, kissin' you, bein' all cute," she pouted dramatically. "I want a reason to wear a maid of honor dress, please."

"Hey, hey, chill on us. There's no wedding," you sighed with a small laugh, trying to play off how the subject made your stomach twist. "We haven't really talked about it, you know? No biggie."

"What?" She sputtered. "Wait, hang on. Y'all have been together - like - a stupid, ridiculous amount of time. The fuck you mean you haven't talked about it? What are y'all doing, just ignoring the elephant in the room?"

You shrugged lightly, "I don't know, we know if we ever got married, it'd be to each other, but that's really it. We know we want to be together, we know we want to marry each other, but there's been no serious conversation about it."

"Uh, does that sound right to you?" Dani asked Pete.

He shook his head as you all took dainty bites of food to savor the flavors (and save Sugar some). "When I knew with Natalie, I didn't hesitate."

"Well, Carmy isn't like you, Pete," you defended. "He's got a lot on his plate, too, you know?"

"You've said that since Mikey," Dani frowned, her voice quiet.

"With good reason, don't you think? Carmy's just - he's just going through a lot right now and it's a challenge, you know?"

"No, it's more like Carmy's got the emotional intelligence of a fucking teaspoon!"

"Hey," you snapped, "that's not his fault, he doesn't know much better, so watch your mouth."

"He does with you, like... He knows better when he's with you, when it comes to you, Peach," Pete offered softly. "Look, maybe Danielle has a point - it is a little weird. I mean, you guys have been together, what? Six, almost seven years? Creeping up on a decade of just dating - that's a long time. And didn't you guys do that weird little half-dating thing for two years before making it official? Don't you think that's enough time to know if you want to marry someone, and then, you know? Actually marry them? Or at least ask them?"

"Sure, maybe to other people, but Carmy and I have never been conventional, so, I don't see why we need to start now."

Danielle scoffed, "Look, God love Carmy and everything, but you're just wasting time now. He needs to either commit or let you find someone who can actually love you like you deserve."

"Oh, and Carmy doesn't?"

"Wasn't all that long ago that you two took a break 'cause he called you clingy - and some other unsavory terms," Danielle shrugged. "Doesn't really sound like someone who loves you unconditionally - the way you should be loved."

You sighed and sat back in your chair, "I appreciate the insight, but Carm and I are fine. Okay? We've got years under our belts, we don't want to fuck up what obviously works for us so chill out on the questions, okay? I don't have answers to them."

Danielle and Pete shared a look before the man got up to excuse himself to the restroom. You and Dani finished your meals before sipping your wine, waiting for Pete, but Dani sighed, "This lady's been staring in here for, like, ten minutes already. It's freezing, doesn't she want to come in?"

"Hmm? What're you - ?"

"This lady on the street," your friend pointed over her shoulder towards the window her back was now turned to.

When you peaked out, you gasped lightly when you saw Donna Berzatto smoking a cigarette. "Oh, shit!" You stood from your seat, rushing, "Okay, so, uh, yeah - just - can you just sit here for a second? I have to go handle that."

"Who is it?" Dani wondered earnestly.

"I got it, Peach," Pete told you, passing by the table swiftly with a hand patting your shoulder to keep you at your table.

"What the hell's happening?" Dani asked. "Who is that?"

"Nothing, no one, it's okay, I think that's someone we know, just, uh, hang on a second? We'll be right back."

"Sure," she nodded in confusion, watching you get from your seat and follow Pete out the door onto the blistering cold sidewalk.

"Hey, Mama Donna," you greeted happily, arms crossing over your chest to protect from the wind. "Have you been inside yet? We saved you a seat and all, but isn't this - just wow?" You grinned, trying to encourage her to say anything about her children's hard work.

"Oh, no, no, not you, too, Peach, why are you here?" She groaned lightly, looking upset and close to tears.

"I'm here 'cause of Carmy? I-It's opening night, yeah?" You offered in confusion. "Why? What's wrong, Mama D?" You worried, glancing at an emotional Pete.

"No, it's just, I can't come in, I can't, just no," she backed away, only now making you notice the way Pete cried. "I'm so sorry, Peach, honey, but I was never here. Okay? I-I'll call them later, I swear, I promise, I'll call them - but I-I-I wasn't here. Okay? You can't tell them I was here. I'm so sorry."

"Donna, don't do this," you begged, head shaking. "Don't, please. Just come in with Pete and I - just sit there for a bit. Just come in and see what your kids have done - Donna, it's so beautiful. You'd be so proud, but you should really see it for yourself - "

"I'm sorry, I'm so sorry, I can't, I'm sorry, I'm sorry, not tonight, no, I'm sorry, I can't," she deflected in a rambling mumble, turning and hustling down the sidewalk with her head shaking like a Etch-A-Sketch.

You rounded on Pete, "What the hell was that? Pete, what just happened?"

"Um, I-I don't - I didn't mean to."

"Pete? What didn't you mean?"

"She didn't tell her mom about the baby," he rushed, tears falling. "Nat didn't tell Donna, Peach, and I think I just did - I think I just fucked up and told her."

"Oh, no... No, Pete, you didn't."

"I didn't mean to! I swear it was an accident!"

"No, I know you didn't mean to, honey," you rushed, opening your arms to bring him in for a tight hug. "Oh, you poor boy, I'm sorry. I'm so sorry, Pete."

He sighed, "I'm sorry, too, Peach."

"For what?"

"That... We fell in love with Berzattos and this is our new normal now, right?" He sniffled.

You half-smiled, "Yeah, something like that. But it's okay. See, where Donna's afraid to give her love, neither of us are. Sugar and Carm deserve that from us, right? To be authentic and just love them?"

He nodded, "Yeah, you're right."

"And that's all we gotta do... Is love them, Pete."

"God knows where else they'd get it," he huffed, wiping his face. "Hey, um, I'll be in, in a second - I just need a minute alone, I think, in the cold."

"Take all the time you need," you agreed.

"We're not - we're not telling them about this, right?"

You sighed, "No, I don't think so - at least right now. It might hurt them more, you know? To know Donna was here, but never came in. That she ran away... Again. It'll hurt, they deserve to be happy about tonight."

Pete nodded rapidly, looking like he was gonna burst into tears. Instead of going back inside, you just moved to Pete's side and stood there; producing a cigarette, lighting it, offering Pete a drag that he turned down, and the both of you just standing silently; one smoking, one crying, both processing.

"Wow, look at these gorgeous ladies! By far the baddest in the whole place! Yeah, man!" Fak teased as he approached you and Danielle after closing the The Bear officially. "What a privilege to have you both dine with us this evening! Ugh, truly an honor to see you both here," he praised comically, evening giving a small bow that his brother mimicked.

Your eyes rolled, "You're laying it on really thick when I already tipped you." He snickered with Theo. "Hey, seriously, though, tonight was incredible. I mean, it was all so beautiful, you should all be so proud."

"Oh, we are," Neil giggled, his brother hanging off his shoulders.

"Good," you teased. "Uh, is now an okay time to go back and see him? Kinda wanna offer my compliments to the chef directly, you know?"

"No," Fak answered instantly, "uh, well, probably not the best time."

"Yeah, probably not," Theodore echoed.

"I can sense you two ramping up to something," you sighed, "so, I'm gonna ask you skip all that and tell me what's wrong. Why can't I go see my boyfriend? He just had an incredibly successful opening night, I kinda wanna kiss him if you don't mind."

"Um, well, h-he didn't want you to worry, so, he said not t'tell you, but, uh... Yeah, no, Carmy's, like, locked in the walk-in freezer. Han Solo style."

"What?"

"Locked in the walk-in," Fak nodded rapidly, "yeah, no, the handle - like, the whole handle came off. He's locked in, Peach..."

"Oh, my fucking God," you breathed. "Are you saying he - he missed opening night? Neil!"

"Yeah, kinda... Well, sorta - I mean, technically, but - "

"Oh, Jesus," you breezed past them all.

"Mmm-mmm, the fridge guy's name is Terry," Tina corrected Carmy, flinching a little when he slapped the other side of the metal door he was locked behind.

"See, th-tha-that's what I'm talking about!" Carmy raged. "I'm so fucking distracted, and for what? For fucking what? 'Cause of a girl?" He chuckled ruefully to himself.

"Nuh-uh, don't do that, Carmy," Tina scolded. "That's not no girl, that's your girl, that's Peach - you don't lash out at her, baby."

"Yo, maybe - maybe I'm just not built for this. Right? Maybe that's okay! Maybe that just is. She'd be better off, Tina... I'm just - I'm not built for this."

But what Carmy didn't hear was Sydney asking Tina to cover her at the front because she needed to step out the back, get some air; Tina accepting and telling Carm to hang on a moment. Something he missed. While Tina took Syd's spot, Syd rushed outside, and you slipped in the kitchen door; Carmy being surrounded by shitty ripped tape and an entire side full of the flowers he had brought in for tonight - for you. It was a haunting reminder; something suffocating.

When you got to the walk-in, you were prepared to call out for Carmy, but he started speaking from within, halting any word on your tongue.

"I wasn't here b-because I was looking a-a-at fucking engagement rings when the fridge guy fuckin' called," Carmy ranted, your heart stalling in your chest. "Right? Like, what the fuck was I thinking? Like I was gonna get married? Commit to this relationship? Be h-her fucking husband or some shit? Have a fucking wife? I'm a fucking - I'm a fuckin' psycho!" He laughed a little, the tears springing to your eyes as his words disarmed your heart and emotional dam. "That's why! That's why I'm good at what I do! That's how I operate! I am the best because I didn't have any of this fuckin' bullshit, right? I could - I could focus and I could concentrate and I had a routine and I - and I had fuckin' cell reception, and Peach and I just had our own routine! We didn't need this extra bullshit, and now..."

You just listened, leaning on the freezer's door, tears silently leaking down your cheeks as you had the horrendous realization that you were what now slowed Carmy down. You were what currently stood in his way, when this whole time, you thought you were helping; making things easier; supporting him. No... No, his words rattled your heart to accept that you were now the bane; the object of his ire. You and your relationship was what was wrong and was causing Carmy hurt and professional complications.

Something you never wanted to contribute towards. You both always said if this relationship got to be too hard, you'd walk away. Better to feel anger than resentment; and now, you knew you had to walk away else risk that resentment fester.

Carmy started up again, "I don't need to provide amusement or enjoyment, I don't need to be someone's 'to have and to hold'. I don't need to receive any amusement or enjoyment, nor for someone to have and hold me... And I'm completely fine with that. Because no amount of good is worth how terrible this fucking feels." You were ready to open your mouth, but he finished by nailing the final nail in the coffin of your relationship, "It's just a complete waste of fuckin' time - entertaining what I know I shouldn't. Being in this relationship, trying to give what I don't have, wasting everyone's time."

You took your chance, speaking through your tears, "I'm really sorry you feel that way, Carmen."

"Peach?" Carmy rasped from behind the door, sounding more alert than he had before. "Baby? Hey, hey, Peaches? That you? Peach - hey. Hey," he sounded desperate as you backed away from the door, a fist pounding into the metal, "hey, no, Y/N? Y/N!" The seriousness settled over you both, Carmen understanding you heard a lot more than ever intended and once those words are out there, there's no getting them back. "Y/N, baby? Hey, no, no, Y/N - listen to me - hey, no, no! I-I didn't know you were there, baby, okay? No, Y/N, please - tell me you're there now, let me explain." He paused. "Let me explain! Please! C'mon, baby, please, let me fucking explain - tell me you're still there! Y/N? Y/N!"

You sniffled and walked away, feeling smaller than you ever had in your life. You barely noticed when the kitchen door opened, not until a figured dressed in black stopped you. "Peach? Hey, hey," Richie halted you - taking note of the tears. "What's wrong? What happened? Are you okay - who fuckin' did it?"

You just stared at Richie for a long moment, opening your mouth twice before sighing and smiling sadly. "I never wanted to be what got in his way," you whispered sadly. "I'm sorry, Richie."

"Peaches, hey, what's - "

But you reached up to kiss his cheek, "Tonight was so beautiful, Cousin, and I'm so fucking proud of you all. Thank you for everything - not just tonight, Richie, but everything you do." You smiled again, whispering, "Take care of him. Okay? He'll need you."

"What're you talking about? What's going on? Where are you going? Hey, where are you going, Peach, please?"

"Have a good night, Richie, I love you," you whispered, leaving out the kitchen door as quickly as you could. "Hey," you sniffled, approaching Dani with the Fak Brothers, "can we go now, please?"

"Are you okay?" Dani worried in shock.

"I'd really like to go, Dani, please," you rushed, throwing your coat on and smiling at the Brothers as if your heart wasn't in pieces. "Thanks again for tonight, you guys, it was magical."

"Peach? Wait, hey, are you okay, baby? What just happened?" Neil worried, watching you snatch Dani's hand, but pause when screaming was heard from the kitchen. Everyone stared at the door, Neil muttering, "The fuck are they...?"

"Now, Dani, please," you whimpered to your friend, who wasted no time in escorting you out of The Bear. The moment you were outside, you burst into sobs, Dani grunting a little as she lead you down a side alley to lean you on a brick wall and beg you to breathe normally.

"What the hell just happened? Hey, honey, you need to breathe," she smoothed hair off your face - but it was like you were drowning in the air with the way you gasped and gaped and panted and whimpered and choked yourself.

"I-I-I-I think - I think w-we're done, I think we're done, I think - oh, fuck - I think we just broke up," you sobbed, hands on your knees. "Oh, my God, Dani," you whimpered, "I-I think - I think we're done, Danielle, oh, my fucking God. I-I heard things tonight that I just - I can't not know, anymore! He said - fuck! He was just so candid, he didn't know I was there so h-he was sayin' things I have t-to now confront - and I really didn't fucking want to! He just - he doesn't want to really marry me, D, and-and-and he was apparently looking a-a-a-at rings - fucking engagement rings! But then he said that w-was the issue - he missed the fridge guy's call 'cause he was looking at fucking rings for me and this is why he missed opening night - 'cause the fucking fridge broke! Oh, my God, Danielle, i-i-it's my fault, it's my fucking fault, he missed the most important night of his life and it's my fault - "

You were cut off by your stomach lurching, emptying your insides onto the pavement. The delicious appetizer, the tantalizing main course, Marcus' fresh baked bread that was delightfully soft on the inside yet baked crisp on the outside, and every bit of the sweetened dessert - all wasted on Chicago bricks.

"Okay, okay, ah, shit, just get it out, babe, there you go," Danielle held your hair, catching you in a suffocating hug once you were done puking. "I've got you, babe, I've got you. You're okay, no, hey, this isn't your fault. I've got you, come on. I think we need pints of ice cream and the saltiest pretzels we can find," she pushed some hair from your sticky forehead, pouting dramatically, "maybe some Pepto? Few Saltines and ginger ale? C'mon, we're going back to mine, there's a good girl," she coaxed you from the ground and away from the wall, "c'mon, you're stronger than this. There's my girl, here we go, just one foot in front of the other - together, with me, just like that."

You sobbed, not knowing that Sydney and her father stood listening just a few feet away behind a set of dumpsters.

The moment the freezer's door was open and Carmy was free, he was sprinting around the kitchen to grab his coat, leave Neil in charge of closing, and racing out the door as the Fak Brothers yelled at him for hurting your feelings.

"Hey, hey, hey, Chef! Carmy, wait!" Sydney chased him outside.

"No time!"

"Wait! She went with her friend!"

Carmy came to a tripping halt, catching himself before he hit the pavement before whirling around to approach her, "What?"

"Her friend? She was with some girl tonight?"

"Yeah - yeah, yeah, yeah, uh, um, that's - yeah, that's Danielle," Carmy nodded. "Her best friend, yeah, they were here tonight, sitting with Pete and Sugar."

"Listen, Carmy, I heard them when they left the restaurant... Peach was really upset, like, more upset than I've ever heard, saying you two broke up? Or something? She cried so hard, Carm, she actually threw up, it sounded like she was in genuine distress. I-I didn't know if I should've intervened, but her friend was with her and helping."

"Shit - fuck - Goddamnit," he seethed. "All right, thank you - "

"I doubt they went to your place, I think I heard her friend saying they were going to her apartment."

"Yeah, yeah, yeah, great, I know where Dani lives, thanks Syd!" Carmy bid, sprinting in the other direction - never bothering with the public bus system, just running into the night. Sydney was left to sigh on the sidewalk, Neil and Theo joining her before Richie followed - all watching Carmy disappear down the sidewalk.

"He's a fucking idiot," Richie shook his head.

"What the hell even happened?" Syd asked.

"Carmy mouthed off in the walk-in, Peach heard it all," Richie supplied. "You know the dumbass was gonna propose tonight?"

"What?" Syd blinked in shock.

"Yeah," Neil tacked on, "we had a whole plan and everything. Candles, soft music, flowers - there's a bunch of flower bouquets in the walk-in."

"I'm sure that was hard for Carm to look at," Syd sympathized.

"Doesn't excuse whatever he said," Richie snapped. "She looked devastated."

"She cried so hard, she threw up in the alley," Syd frowned.

"How do you know?" Neil asked.

"I heard her," the other chef frowned. "My dad and I - we actually both heard her."

"Jesus fuck," Richie seethed.

"I mean... Should we still set up?" Theo wondered to his brother. "What if they kiss and make up, like always? Carmy might still wanna go through with the proposal, right? You know?"

"Maybe," Neil trailed, looking at Richie.

"I don't fucking know," he sighed, hands on his hips.

"She thinks they broke up, I imagine whatever she heard was pretty nasty," Sydney frowned. "Think they'll really make up tonight?"

"Let's hope," Richie sighed. "That fuckin' idiot isn't gonna find anyone better than Peach. Fuck," he looked around the city street. "All right, fuck it, fine, let's fucking set up. Not like the jackass deserves it, but let's do it for Peach."

Neil and his brother grinned at each other, turning to hustle back into The Bear - leaving Sydney and Richie on the street. No words were exchanged, just silent shakes of their heads before they followed the Faks with the intention to help set up for a proposal nobody even knew if would still happen.

The cold night burned Carmy's lungs, but it was nothing compared to the feeling of suffocation he felt earlier when listening to one of your voicemails while trapped.

Your words were sweet as pie, as they usually were; a voicemail left when you were still at work, but feeling so excited to see him that night that you just had to call him. You reminded him of the adoration and love you held for him, relaying how proud you felt - and that you knew Mikey would be, too. You were always doing that, reassuring Carmy; and maybe that's why he felt so freaked out, he wasn't used to it. Even after almost 7 years together, he just wasn't used to what he didn't know he deserved.

Because Carmy didn't think he deserved anything remotely close to love, understanding, compassion, patience, and / or reassurance.

He had sobbed out loud as he locked his phone, not having the heart to delete your message. He often never did - he liked listening to your voice on long, hard nights; it brought him peace when the world felt too loud. He also kept whatever little notes you left for him, even going as far as to get a few of your hand-drawn hearts tattooed on his forearm. One for each anniversary you've shared together. He realized he never wanted to be without you and all his doubts and fear was him projecting his own incompetence towards this relationship; so, he locked his phone, he didn't delete your message.

The moment the fridge door had been opened, Carmy was out of there, shot off like a Roman Candle - your words of love and understanding still ringing in his ears as he was freed. He needed to apologize, and he needed to apologize right fucking now.

The whole run to Danielle's apartment, Carmy wasn't sure what to say to you; mulling over different ideas in his head. He tried to plan his speech, but the only thing he could think of was how much he loved you and that the ring in his pocket weighed a hundred pounds.

He pounded at Danielle's door. Carmy paced slightly as he waited, knocking frantically, and surely waking the neighbors - but that didn't matter. All that mattered was talking to you, something he was desperate to accomplish. When the door opened, your friend offered a stale look and shook her head, "Nope."

"Dani, please," he halted the closing door, "it's all a misunderstanding, I swear to God, please, just - let me try to fix this. Please, okay? I-I need her - I fucking need her and I have to fix this 'cause she's all that matters, okay? So, let me talk to her - please. Please, Danielle!"

"Yeah? The only thing?"

"More than anyone, more than anything - more than The fucking Bear, I swear to fucking God, Danielle! Just - Just one chance, please. I-I don't know how it all got so fucked, but please, I have to try - "

"Whatever you said in that freezer, Carmen, fucking gutted her, you hear me?" Dani stood in her doorway protectively. "Should've had your ass frozen for the hurt you caused her. How the fuck do you intend on making this right? Huh? It's been almost a fucking decade, dude, if you're seriously still afraid of commitment, just fuck off and leave her alone. Let her walk away 'cause I promise, there's a line of dudes who would love to put a ring on her loyal-ass finger - "

"Please, let me fix this," Carmy begged, sounding close to tears. "I need her, Danielle, please."

"It's okay, D," a voice whispered from behind Danielle, and when she turned, you were revealed - jacket and purse in hand, looking completely exhausted, drained, and disheveled. "I'm just tired, Dani, but we have to talk about this... So, I'll go home with him and call you tomorrow, okay?"

"You sure?"

"It's a decent walk, gives us too much time to talk," you shrugged, refusing to meet Carmy's bloodshot eyes. "Thanks for tonight, sorry I was such a mess," you whispered, hugging your best friend since pre-school.

"Girl, don't you ever apologize to me. But hey, look, I don't know, you were just drowning in your tears, like, five minutes ago. Sure you really wanna go? You can stay here as long as you'd like, girl, fuck him."

"Better to work it out now than later, I guess," you whispered, letting her kiss your cheek and see you guys out.

"She calls me cryin', Carmen, I'll kick your ass," She threatened as you moved down the apartment's hall. You might've snickered just a little, but the amusement was wiped clean when you rounded the corner and came up to the elevators.

Now that it was just you two, it was dreadfully awkward.

"Baby - "

"Just - don't talk for right now, Carmen," you sighed, shaking your head. "I'm still digesting all you said."

He frowned when you walked onto the elevator without a single emotion on your face, following you, and when on the ground floor, moved out to head home. It was quiet, it was awkward; only the sounds of traffic filling the space between you as you walked.

"Listen," he started with a long sigh, "you came in at the worst time, Peach, heard some shit you shouldn't have that I-I didn't even mean. I was just," he paused, sighing, "really angry and frustrated, fucking running my mouth 'cause I didn't know what else to do."

"Sounded like I came in at the best time since you're not very forthcoming with emotions. So, hearing your confession put a lot in perspective for me, Carm."

"I was just angry, Peach," he frowned, hands deep in his pockets. "Felt like I was self sabotaging myself, I wasn't sure what else to feel. So, I just lashed out. I didn't mean it, but I just felt like being angry... So fucking angry, baby, I just - I didn't know what else to feel."

"I don't know if I can be with someone like that," you whispered. "Someone who throws our relationship under the bus when he's angry, someone who's first line of defense is apparently to blame the relationship he's been in for over half a decade with the same girl. Someone you've known your whole life..."

"Peach - "

"If it's that easy for you to just disregard us, I don't think we should continue this."

Carmy took a breath and reached out to pull you to a stop. He dug in his pocket for a moment, then showed you the black velvet jewelry box. "I was gonna propose tonight, when everyone was gone," he explained when you took the box to open gingerly. "I think because that was on my mind already, something I was more than nervous to actually do, you're right, it did become my first line of defense to blame us - not just you, baby, but us. You and me... Mostly me, though," he chuckled sadly. "You're this perfect, sweet angel who just loves me out loud when I don't deserve it, and I'm... I'm just me," he sighed, eyes reddening. "And I know I'm never gonna be enough for you, I think I started to get in my head about if you said no. How I missed the call from Terry about the fridge 'cause I was picking out an engagement ring that you didn't even want, that you rejected - rejected me; and in turn, I missed opening night, and it all just - it got to a boiling point. Look, Peach, it's never been a secret that I don't think I deserve you... But I wanted to be the man that could at least give you an honest try of my best. You've stuck by me the past seven years when you should've ran for the hills, and I knew I wanted us for life years ago - but everything was still so up in the air. So confusing. So fucked up. I figured, after opening tonight, if things went t'plan, I could propose - prove to you that we're on our feet and there weren't any rugs to be pulled."

"What if things didn't go to plan?" You whispered.

"We're kinda living it now," he admitted, hand rubbing the back of his neck. "But even if tonight was all a total failure, I know I might've still done it because it's you, Peach. It's you... I've known for years you're who I want, I just never knew how to do this - to move us forward. You're my first relationship, hopefully my only relationship, and I just didn't know how to advance us. I think when things got real for me, my insecurities crept in, and I just reacted - I didn't think."

"We always said when this wasn't healthy or when this wasn't good for us anymore, we'd walk away," you reminded. "That we'd rather be sad or angry about a breakup instead of letting resentment fester from being together."

"It's still good for me, Peach, we're still good," he whispered, stepping closer. "Is it still good for you? Or did I lose you completely tonight?"

"I don't know, Carmy, you've been lashing out a lot lately. At me specifically."

"And with The Bear now open, I-I should be okay. You know? Back to normal?"

You chuckled dryly, "I see, back to your high walls? Emotional constipation?"

"Then maybe not normal," he corrected, "because I just needed to get us here, to tonight, to opening, and then show you that it's over. Show you that part of our lives is over and we only have more adventures to look forward to. Not ones like this, though," he gestured up the street, your eyes cutting over and realizing you were back at The Bear.

"Do you really think you're a psycho?"

He chuckled, "After tonight? Yeah, pretty convinced... Plus, I, uh, I saw in the freezer the way we're labeling things - and got angry about it. Angry about the way we were tearing tape and labeling things. It was so fucking stupid, but I just - I felt so crazy. I still do, I still feel like my head doesn't make sense and I'm a bit, you know... Crazy."

You nodded slowly, "Then how can you promise me this kinda shit won't happen again?"

"I don't think I can, but I can make you the promise that I am working on it; trying to identify when I feel reactive, trying to calm that down. I'm trying, Peach, I really am - it's just... Taking a lot of time," he sighed sadly. "And I know you don't have any more left to give me."

"I've already given you this many years," you reminded softly, "I think I could spare another or two if it meant you getting your shit together, that you get better, stop feeling so crazy."

"I don't deserve anymore time - "

"I think you need to step back and reevaluate what it means to be deserving because you always say that. That you don't deserve something - even as simple as time. Everyone deserves time and opportunity to figure shit out, Carmy, and you're no exception."

He nodded, "I'm... Trying." He took a long, deep breath, "I'm, uh... Going to meetings, you know, like, uh, Al-Anon and whatever."

"That's good, they're there to help," you nodded, stepping closer to take his hands in yours after closing the ring box and stuffing it back in his pocket. "Now, I think you need to do something."

"Anything, Peach."

"Take my hand, bring me back to The Bear, and go about your plan."

He froze in shock, blinking at you in earnest, "You really mean that?"

"Do I look like I'm joking?"

"No, ma'am, and I think that scares me more."

"You'd rather break up? 'Cause at this point, Carm, we either move forward with this engagement and fucking work our shit out, or we break up. It's been almost a decade. It's your choice, you're the one who was saying he couldn't be someone's husband, that he didn't need to provide anyone nor have them provide you with anything. So, you tell me what you want to do - because all I know is that I love you, I want you for life, but not if you're going to resent me and regret moving our relationship forward. I don't need to get married, Carmy, but you can't keep jerking me around like you have been. So... Make a decision based on what you want - based on what's best for you. Not what's best for us, but put yourself first right now, Carmy, and make a decision about what you want."

With a nod of his head, Carmy cleared his throat and offered you his hand. When he felt you lock your fingers with his, he glanced up and down the street, then lead you across it. Up the sidewalk and to the front door of The illuminating Bear, he paused to produce his keys and then lead you inside.

The lights were dim, but a flip of the switch brightly lit up the newly constructed restaurant. He seemed nervous at your cool demeanor, watching you shed your coat and set your purse down; but his hand took yours again and lead you further into the place. He seemed nervous, but once in the kitchen, it was almost like Carmy's stress melted away.

"I was... I had this plan," he explained softly, leaning on one of the work stations with both hands in yours to keep you in front of him. "I have all these candles, right? Was gonna distract you in here," he looked around the fluorescent lighting, "while Richie, Fak, Tina, and the others set everything up. We'd hang in here after the place was closed down, you know, show you around the completed kitchen. And really casually, I'd ask if you were ready to go, so, we'd go out the front, and we'd walk right into the candlelight..."

"Yeah?" He nodded, thumbs running over your hands as he pushed off the counter. "Don't deviate from your plan now..."

Carmy smirked, "Wanna hear the boring kitchen stuff?"

"Of course, I do."

So, he lead you around in a tour of the kitchen; showing off the new office space that he invited you to take advantage of whenever you wanted. The sleek appliances were shown off, the vast fridges, freezers, new cutlery, state-of-the-art dishwashers. Everything, he showed you, knowing you helped him pick a lot of it out - it was still nice to see it all come together finally.

And then, slowly, he lead you out of the kitchen, but to your honest shock, the dining room was covered in lit candles and different bouquets of thick, gorgeous floral arrangements. "Oh, holy shit," you breathed, Carmy hiding his confusion much better than you.

You came to a slow halt in the middle of the room, the lights out and only leaving the candles to provide an ambiance. "I had this whole speech planned, too," Carmy told you softly. "Remind you of the day we met, how you saved me from those jackass bullies - remember?"

You smiled softly, emotions swirling in your chest, "First day of first grade, you had a Buzz Lightyear backpack and some kids were picking on you 'cause of it."

"And what did you do?"

You felt bashful remembering, but humored him by answering, "Pushed their faces in the mud at recess and made them apologize."

"You've been my best friend since that day," he nodded, bringing you in a few steps closer. "And when we got to high school, my feelings changed. You weren't just my best friend, but the girl I was madly in love with... Took me a couple years to buck up the courage to ask you out officially, though."

"Sure took your sweet time," you whispered with a smile, "but all good things to those who wait, right?"

"And I think you've waited long enough for a man to be who you deserve," he frowned. "All these years - it's been you at my side. You even - fuck - you even came over to Amsterdam for a bit because I was feeling overwhelmed and lonely. Sad, maybe even a little homesick. But you just - you just showed up like it was the most common thing in the world."

You chuckled through your tears, "Yeah, we had some good times on that boat, didn't we?"

He nodded with a softening smile, pushing hair from your face and behind your ear; pausing to hold your cheek carefully. "And when we came back stateside... You were still the only constant presence in my life. You were my family without blood, and I knew after that Christmas that you'd forever be my other half, and I'd spend my life conveying how grateful I am for you. I just - I never knew how to put it into words until now."

"What changed?"

"Realizing that I wanted to marry you years ago - and I should've. I know I shouldn't have drug my feet with us, delay our inevitable, because honestly? I couldn't see my life without you in it and I knew I needed you with me forever. Peach," he frowned, reaching for your other cheek, "we agreed when this wasn't healthy, we'd walk away - I remember that. But I need you to know, I'll never fucking regret you. I'll never resent you. You've been unwaveringly supportive and loving and... And I've been the luckiest man to experience it all. But now," he pushed himself a step closer so he was hovered over your lips, "I know that you deserve someone just as present in this relationship as you are. I knew once The Bear was done, I was done - I was done beating this bush around and wasting time. I knew what I needed to do because the idea of you not being in my life anymore terrifies me more than anything. I don't remember life without you, Peach, and I don't ever want to know what it's like. So," he cleared his throat, "here, in the restaurant I so desperately wanted to give up on so many times, but you always stopped me, I wanted to make this official. I wanted it to be here to show you that the past year of our turmoil - it's fucking over, Peach. We did it," he whispered, "and now, the next and only thing I want to focus on is us."

Carmy readjusted you both for a little bit of space, holding your left hand tightly as he lowered himself to a single knee; looking up at you with those big, wide, sad blue eyes that were growing redder by the passing second. The candlelight created a romantic atmosphere that cocooned you both in a warm embrace, the flowers around you projecting their floral scent.

"So, I need to ask you something real important, baby," he whispered, his throat bobbing to restrain his emotion that clawed up his throat, "because if I don't, I don't think I could breathe again." He cleared his throat, pulling the ring box from his pocket and opening it to present to you officially. "Y/F/N Y/M/N Y/L/N... My sweetest Peach, I've loved you almost my entire life, you're my best friend, my most loyal and sweetest confidant. You make me want to be a man better than I was yesterday and never before have I ever seriously considered marriage - until you. Now? Now, I can't get the idea out of my head, so, my sweet girl," he took another breath, the tears in his eyes swelling and slowly dripping down his cheeks as you slowly got on your knees in front of him, "I need to ask you... W-Would you do me the honor? Of being my wife?"

"Carmen."

He grinned at you, both with tears down your cheeks. "Will you marry me, Y/N? I can't see my life without you in it, so... I want this, I want you for life. Y/N, will you marry me?" He paused, adding a meek little, "Please?" at the end.

With a deep breath, you slowly reached for his cheeks in a soft caress to wipe his tears; both just staring at one another for a good few moments before a face-splitting grin nearly cracked your lips. "Yes," you finally answered, "yeah, yes, yes, of course, I'll marry you, Carmen, yes!"

"Oh, thank fuckin' God," he laughed, letting you lunge forward to knock him backward in a hug - missing the candles arranged in a small circle for you two to stand in. Carmy laughed loudly, happily, giving you a tight squeeze as he mused, "Had my heart beatin' outta my chest for a second there, Peach."

"Oh, please," you laughed, "after all this time, you really thought I'd say no?"

He shrugged meekly, "Thought my most recent fuck-ups would've added to any reasons you might have to say no."

"Oh, spare me - you're my best friend, Carmy, you know I couldn't ever say no to you. Not without puking in nervousness."

"Can we maybe not talk about puke when we just got engaged?"

You laughed and nodded, "Fine, fine, fine, then put the ring on, please."

You presented your left manicured hand, watching Carmy almost giddily removed the band from the box, took a slow, deep breath, and then, the most beautiful ring was being slid onto your finger in an official show of your engagement. Of your undying love. Of your commitment, promises, and future together.

"YEAH!" An array of varying cheers and hollers of support and excitement rang out around you; startling both you and Carmy to look up. Richie, Sydney, Tina, Neil, Theo, Pete, and Sugar all hung in the bathroom's alcove - watching with splitting grins and cheering in celebration.

There was no time to question them as Richie lead the charge over; helping you to your feet for a giant, bear hug before gushing over your engagement ring. Neil and Theo popped one of the authentic bottles of champagne, pouring different flutes for those present.

"Calm down," Natalie scolded Richie lightly, "and move out the way, I want to hug my engaged bestie!"

You squealed with Sugar when her arms wrapped around you tightly, Rich moving on to congratulate Carmy - who apologized for his angry words earlier and thanked them for still setting things up. Richie promised it was for you, not Carmy, but still hugged the little shit with a laugh - indicating he was just joking.

"Let me see!" Natalie grinned, examining the ring Carmy chose and squealing again. "Oh, my God! Oh, it's so pretty! Oh, shit - sisters!" She gasped, holding your hands tightly, "We're going to be sisters - like, officially!"

"Sisters in law, but yeah, cupcake," you beamed at her, wiping your tears and giggling. "I can't - this just doesn't feel real," you told her softly, looking the few feet over to see Carmy with the lads as Sydney stood with you and Sugar. "Him proposing? I genuinely thought it wouldn't happen," you tried to laugh your nerves off, looking at your ring and fiddling with it.

"Yeah, right," Sydney laughed. "I haven't been around that long and even I knew this was gonna happen."

"Oh, please, she's right," Natalie grinned when you went to retaliate, "he first started talking about how he wanted to marry you when he was, like, 15. This has been the longest thing coming."

"Thank you guys for helping," you whispered with a smile. "It's all so beautiful."

"Happy to help for a good cause," Syd smiled, complimenting your ring as Neil called for a toast. Everyone was given flutes of champagne, Carmy's arm wrapping around your waist as each friend gave their own little speech, congratulating you both before the alcohol was being drained.

"Uh, and where are you two going?" Sugar asked about an hour later with a small giggle when Carmy wrapped an arm around your neck after helping you into your coat again.

"Gotta celebrate alone with my fiancé," he smirked, "later, guys! Don't forget to lock up!"

"Carmen!" You scolded with a small laugh, gaping at him.

"What? They got this," Carmy chuckled. "Thanks, you guys, see you tomorrow!"

"We can help clean," you told him as he lead you out of the restaurant.

"Nah, we've got bigger plans," he smirked at you. "Got plenty t'celebrate, yeah? Ever fucked as fiancés before?"

"No - but I hear it's some crazy sex," you whispered, locking your arms around his waist to stay close. Neither of you cared about the bus at this hour, opting to walk home in the cold - not that you felt it. Your love burned brighter than the cold biting your skin.

requesting rules and masterlist

The Bear masterlist

[samandcolbyownme]

Summary: Anon request - "Could you pleaseeeee make a Colby Brock smut based off of the new picture that he posted on Instagram"

Warnings: SMUT18+, strong language, flirting, friends to lovers, slight insecurity talk, unprotected sex, slight choking, hair pulling, fingering, oral (f rec), biting, scratching, filth

Word count: 3.1k | not edited

╔═══━━━─── • ───━━━═══╗

"I'm coming, I'm coming." You say to yourself as you rush to your constantly dinging phone. You pick it up, smiling as you see a few texts from your friend, Colby.

What are you doing?

Come over

I need help with something

Hello???

Y/n

It's me, Colby.

Colby Brock.

Did you forget about me?

You laugh as you text him back, Sorry, who is this Colby person you're referring to?

You roll your eyes at his response, Not funny. I seriously need your help with something.

You sigh, plopping down onto your couch, what do you need help with?

Your eyes read over his text a few times, Just come over and I'll tell you.

That could mean anything. That's how you got roped into going on that creepy investigation with him and Sam.

You purse your lips, fine, I don't have anything better to do tonight anyway.

You get up, getting your stuff around as you hear your phone go off again. You walk over picking it up, Bring your fancy camera please.

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

As you pull up to Sam and Colby's house, you lean your head back. You didn't know what Colby was bringing you in to.

You were kinda nervous because as said, it could be anything and when it comes to not only Colby, but Sam, too, you could never guess.

You get out, walking up to the door. You knock and twist the knob, pushing the door open, "Hello? I'm here."

"I'm upstairs." Colby yells from far away.

"Okay." You yell back as you close the door. You look around and it's quiet.

No sign of Sam, must be just Colby.

"Where ya at?" You yell as you make your way up the stairs.

"My room." He answers loudly. You make your way up to his room and round the corner, slightly caught off guard by a shirtless Colby, "What- ah. Whatcha doin' Colbs?"

He turns towards you and laughs, "I'm trying to take a new picture for Instagram and I can't get it the way I want it."

"Oh so that's why you told me to bring my fancy camera." You let out a sigh, "I thought we were going to some abandoned building."

"No, that's tomorrow." He laughs as your face drops, "I'm kidding, y/n."

"Don't do that." You point to him as you lift the camera strap from across your shoulder, lifting it over your head to set it down on the bed, "So.. do you want me to set up the tripod or.."

You look up at him and he shakes his head, "Can you take them for me?"

You're kind of surprised, "Um, yeah. Yeah I can."

"Your pictures always turn out great." Colby walks over, bringing his phone up, "This is what I have, but I need your professional opinion."

You laugh slightly as you take his phone, swiping through the pictures.

The truth is, you liked Colby - correction.

You were in love with Colby, so no matter what he showed you, you knew you were going to like it anyway.

"Colby." You look up at him, "These are good." You hand him his phone back, "Really good."

He smiles as he takes his phone, "Yeah, but-"

"Get against the wall." You cut him off as you laugh.

He looks at you confused, "What?" He laughs slightly as he looks at the wall you're pointing at, "Go, stand there."

You bring your camera up, taking off the lenses cap before turning it on. You click through the settings, pointing it up at him to make sure it looks right.

"Hey, wait. I'm not ready." He says shyly with a laugh.

"I'm just getting the settings right, Colbs. Relax." You look up at him and smile before looking back down at your camera.

"Okay. I'm ready." You look up, "Are you?"

He moves around slightly, "Yeah, I think so. What do you want me to do?"

"You know what to do." You move over in front of him, bending down a little bit, "Remember when you took me to that place and I about fell through the floor."

Colby laughs and you snap some pictures, "Yeah. I do remember that. Sorry for laughing."

"No it's okay." You smile, "Look to your left."

Colby looks to his right and you laugh, "Your other left, Colby." He laughs and shakes his head, "Fuck. Okay. Sorry."

"No, you're doing great." You bite your lip as you focus. You stand up, "This might be a little weird, but tuck your thumb into the bands of your pants and boxers."

He gives you a weird look, but he obliges, "Oh..Kay.." he slips his thumb into the bands and you move back, "Now drop your other hand."

You snap a few pictures and think about what will make him laugh, "Think of something funny."

He instantly starts laughing and looks down, shaking his head.

"Got it." You whisper to yourself, "What did you think about?" You bring your camera down as you stand up and Colby laughs again, "You almost falling through the floor."

"You're a jerk." You laugh, "But that's why we're friends."

You hated calling him a friend. You wanted more, but you didn't want to risk the friendship because your friendship with Colby was like no other.

"Exactly." He walks over, sitting down on the bed. He grabs the back of your sweatshirt and pulls you back to sit next to him, "Let's see 'em"

You swallow, trying to compose yourself becaus what he just did turned you on.

"Okay." You shift around, clicking through your camera. He leans over and nods at each one, "See, these are better already."

"So. The weird pose I had you do.." You click through, finding that picture, "Take a look."

You hand him your camera and he presses his lips together as he nods "Yep. That's the one." He looks over at you, "That's.. wow."

He smiles and you shrug, "I'm good at my job, what can I say?" You smile and lean in, "I can get these right to my phone so you can look through and send yourself the ones you want."

You pull your phone out of your back pocket and start to load them up, "You know, you have a really beautiful smile."

He tries not to smile so he bites his cheek, "Really?"

You nod, "Really."

You can see his cheeks turning red and he bats the air, "Oh stop it. Making me blush."

You laugh and hold out your phone to him, "Here. Just hit select and then yeah. You know what to do from there." You stand up, "I'm going to go get a drink."

He nods and lays back as he scrolls through.

You leave the room, making your way downstairs and into the kitchen. You lean against the counter for a second because everything about Colby is racing through your mind right now.

You're just friends, you tell yourself over and over again, but a part of you feels like you should be more.

You've come to the painful standstill of just waiting until he makes a move or gives you any hints about him liking you back.

But, sometimes he's just so hard to read because your brain is going frantic with trying to depict whether or not that was a signal.

You take a slow, deep breath before grabbing a drink and heading back towards the stairs. You walk up, making your way to Colby's room.

"Did you pick a picture yet?" You say before taking a sip and he mumbles a quiet, "No."

You tilt your head, studying how his mood changed in the little time you were gone, "Hey." You walk over to him, "What's wrong?"

He shakes his head, pushing your phone away from him, "I just.."

You knew where he was going, but you decided to try and let him talk first.

"Colby." You lay your hand on his arm, "You can talk to me."

"I'm just nervous to post.." he sits up, turning to face you, "Something in me is just finding little things to knit pick at, not post. You know?"

You nod, "I know what you mean, but what I do know is.." you smile, trying not to laugh, "The hoes are going to loooove this."

"Did.. you just.." he laughs, "Did you just quotes a TikTok sound to me?"

You nod your head a few times, "I sure did, but it's true. You could post a candid picture of yourself, when you're mid blink and body wonky because you're walking and the people that absolutely adore you are still going to find it adorable."

He runs his bottom lip between his teeth as he stares at the floor, "You know.." he sighs, lifting his head to look at the wall, "You're right."

"I know I'm right." You smirk slightly, "You want to know how I'm right?"

He looks at you, leaning back to hold his weight up on his arms, "How?" He tilts his head and you lean in, "Because you're-" you poking his chest with every word, "Colby. Fucking. Brock."

His eyes move to your hand before looking up at you.

"Everyone loves you, Colbs." You lower your voice, "Including me."

He swallows, "You love me?"

"As a friend. Yes. In a more than friend's way, also yes." Your heart was racing.

It felt like it was going to rip a hole in your chest.

"It's about time you tell me." He pulls you over, connecting your lips to his. Your hand moves to the side of his neck, moving closer to him.

He pulls you over, causing you to straddle him as he lays back, lips still on his.

"Mm. Wait." He pushes you back slightly, "Let me post that picture." He smirks and grabs his phone and you smile.

You bite your lip trying not to laugh. Colby moves his phone out of the way and furrows his brows, "What's so funny?"

You laugh slightly, "Nothing.. I was just thinking about, you know, stirring the pot."

He smirks, "How so?"

You sigh, "after you post it, I thought about commenting something like hey, I took that picture."

Colby stares at you for a few seconds, a smile growing wider by the second, "Okay."

"Okay? What?" You look at him as he starts laughing, "What did you do?"

Your eyes move to your phone lighting up with an Instagram notification, "Oh no. Colby." You laugh as you reach over, grabbing your phone to see.

[yourusername]: colbybrock tagged you in a post.

Your mouth drops and you look at him. He smirks and shrugs, "Said you wanted to stir the pot, right?" He grabs your phone, that's about to blow up any second, and tosses it to the side, "Ignore that for right now."

You look back down at him and you nod, "Distract me."

"That I can do." He pulls you back down, connecting your lips to his. His hands slide down your body, gripping your waist before he rolls you over.

His body, now hovering over yours as your legs wrap around his waist.

He moves his head to kiss down your neck, his other hand moving your shirt out of the way. He moves down, your legs falling to the bed as he kisses down your stomach.

He looks up at you and you nod at him. He slips his fingers into the band of your sweats, pulling them down your legs and discarding them to the floor.

You bite your lip as you watch him kiss up your leg, moving to your inner thigh.You let out a gasp as his lips attach to your skin, leaving a bruise to where only you'll be able to find it.

His hands slide up, hooking into your panties as he tugs on them. He leans up, watching as you lift your hips for him to pull them off.

He drops them down on the bed, moving up to kiss up your opposite thigh, sucking a matching bruise into your skin.

You tilt your head back, letting out a moan, "Colby." A louder moan is ripped from your lips as you feel his tongue slip upward between your folds.

He moves to your clit, circling a few times before attaching his lips to suck.

Your eyes roll back, hand moving to the back of his head to tangle your fingers into his hair. You arch your back, feeling his tongue slip down to push into you.

"C-Colby." You whine, looking down at him as your face scrunches up. He tilts his head up, locking eyes with yours as he brings a hand up, sliding two fingers into you.

Your jaw goes slack, arching your back slowly as he curls his fingers up, "You feel so wet." His voice is low, cut by his lips attaching to your clit.

You let out a loud moan, tangling your fingers in his hair as his fingers move in and out of you at a slow and teasing pace.

He lifts his head, looking up at you as you whine, "D-don't stop."

His lips go back to your clit, speeding up the pace of his fingers a little bit, driving you more crazy, "Y-yes." You buck your hips slowly, moaning as Colby brings you close to the edge of orgasm, "F-fuck. Fuck."

You squeeze his fingers, closing your thighs slightly as you cum. A string of moans continuously leaves your mouth as he guides you through your high, pulling his fingers out to get up so he can take the rest of his clothes off.

You take off your top, watching as he crawls up the bed, keeping his eyes on yours as he positions himself between your knees.

"I love you." Colby whispers as he brushes hair from your face.

You smile, "You do?"

He nods, "Yes. I just thought you wanted to be friends, so I didn't say anything."

You laugh slightly, "I promise you, that wasn't the case at all." You lift your head up to kiss him. He slides a hand down, pushing your thigh up as he slips the head of his cock in.

You gasp against his lips, sliding your hand around to tangle your fingers in the hair at the nape of his neck.

You sling your leg over his waist, pushing him into you, "Please."

He rests his forehead against yours, a groan leaving his lips as he pushes all the way into you. You moan, laying your arm over his neck. He lays his hand on your cheek as he slowly pulls out, thrusting back in.

"F-fuck." He kisses your face, "You feel so good." He kisses down your neck, sucking marks into your shoulder.

You moan, eyes rolling back at the pleasure between your legs and the bruises forming on your skin.

He lifts his head and you kiss back his jaw, down to his neck. You bite down on his neck, earning a deep throaty moan from him as you suck a hicky into his neck.

You tilt your head back, moaning out as he thrusts all the way in and stops. You look up at him, “You’re mine.. and only mine.”

“Always have been, babe.” He smirks, continuing to thrust again, “We just didn’t know it.”

He slides his hand up to your neck, gently closing it as he rests his head against yours, “I’m so close.”

You nod once, “Mhm.” You whimper as he tightens his hand on your neck, “M-me too.”

He kisses your forehead as he slides his hand down to interlock his fingers with yours. He pins your hand by your head, moaning as his thrusts grow sloppy.

You clench his cock, rolling your hips as your chest presses against his, “Fuck, fuck.” You lay your head back, moaning loudly as you cum around him.

Colby is quick to follow, pulling out to cum onto your waist.

He presses a kiss to your lips, “Hang tight.” He gets up and goes to grab a towel, “Okay.” He wipes your waist off and helps you sit up.

You smile up at him, “About time right?”

“About time for what?” He tilts his head and tries not to crack a smile, “I can’t.” He laughs and leans down, his hands on either side of you, “I know what you mean.”

He presses a few kisses to your lips and smirks, “Should we check and see how much damage stirring the pot did?”

You bite your lip, “Oh yeah.” You move back up his bed, getting under the covers as he grabs both phones.

He hands you yours before climbing into bed behind you. You cuddle back into his chest and take a deep breath, “Ready?”

He nods, “No, but I’m curious.” He chuckles as you click on to Instagram, smiling as Colby’s post is the first one that pops up.

Your eyes go wide, “over thirteen thousand comments. Holy fuck.” You heart it and you can tell he smiles, “I had to heart it. I mean, I’m tagging in it, right?”

He chuckles and nods, “Would be rude if you didn’t.”

You click onto the comments and you immediately laugh when you see Sam’s comment.

samgolbach bros tryna break the internet

User1 petition for Colby to be a Calvin Klein ad

User2 dont you dare touch that delete button

zachjustice My mom wants your number

User3 im suing if you delete

User4 thank you

User5 OH MY LANTA

solhardymusic It’s working

User6 he’s so pretty I want to cry

You bite down on your lip as you move to tap the comment bar. You giggle slightly as you hit send.

Yourusername whoever took this is lucky

Colby shakes his head as he laughs and brings his phone over in front of your face, “Well see about that.”

Since you’re lying on his other arm, you see what he’s typing in reply to your comment.

colbybrock my good luck charm

You shake your head, setting your phone down before you turn to face him, “Aren’t you sweet.”

“When I want to be.” He drops his phone and pulls you onto him, “Ready to go again?”

You smile and nod your head, “Again.” You lean down to kiss him, “And again.” You smile against his lips, “And again.”

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

Thanks for reading! Let me know how you liked it, and yes.. those are actual comments from Colby’s actual Instagram post.

Love you all! 🖤

Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!

[withleeknow]

i think you'll do well with requests bc they seem to be popular in the fanfic side of tumblr! but even if it doesn't take off that quick, at least that'll be less overwhelming bc some ppl can be so demanding....anyways, i hope the best for you in this new journey haha 💝

me personally, i'm not very creative so i'll leave the details to the professionals (aka you) but i'd like to req something from minho's pov. i think those type of stories are SEVERELY lacking in the lee know fics department lol 🥲 it could be a childhood friends to lovers where he is pining for oc but he has a lot of self esteem issues and thinks she's not interested in him. also a big softie and just all around head over heels for her. you can add your magic! (if this is even remotely interesting enough to write lol i just want a minho pov tbh shsjjfjdjdj 😭)

light years.

summary: three times minho bites his tongue, and one time you don't let him.

pairing: minho x f!reader genre/warnings: childhood friends to lovers, fluff, angst; kissing, cursing, so much pining i could hurl. could this have been more edited? oh absolutely lmao but i actually don't hate it sooo this is what we're going with :p word count: 4.2k note: to the first anon, thank you so much for your kind words! :') and i'm sorry that this took me longer than expected. i was trying to figure out what i wanted to write for your prompt but then i got the second request with the song and i thought they would go nicely together hehehehe i hope the both of you enjoy thissss

as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡

navigation / request masterlist / ko-fi

I'm not sure what it means to love But I blink kind of slow around you I'm not sure what it means to love But I'll grow wherever you do What that means, I don't have a clue

I'm Not Sure - Margeaux Beylier

One.

Minho is 18 years old, and he doesn't know what love is, doesn't really care for it at all.

While his friends are out there wrapped in the clutches of young love - the kind that blooms with stolen glances in classrooms and sticky notes passed in secrecy, Minho finds it simply unnecessary. He doesn't understand it whenever Hyunjin whines about not having a girlfriend because they're still young, they've got all the time in the world for romance later down the line. It's not the end of the world like Hyunjin laments it is.

Minho has his own life to prioritize. College is starting after the summer and he still needs to figure out how he's going to cope with the absence of his cats once he moves away. He's got dancing and he's got his other hobbies to keep him fulfilled and occupied.

And above all, he's got you.

You're getting ready for your sister's wedding when it happens for the first time. Or rather, when it doesn't happen.

You step back into the room where Minho is waiting for you on the sofa, his gaze resting idly on the screen of his phone, scrolling absentmindedly through his friends' group chat even though he has no interest in whatever they're talking about. You cough lightly to indicate your return after disappearing into the bathroom minutes prior to change into your dress. He looks up upon your soft announcement, and when his eyes settle on you, he swears it feels like an invisible force has collided with his chest and knocked all of the air from his lungs.

Throughout all his years of knowing you, inseparable from childhood until now, Minho has never seen you like this - all dolled up with your hair falling over your collarbones, cascading over your shoulders in soft waves that beckons him to run his fingers through. The light blue dress hugs you beautifully, the silky material catching the light from outside the window every time you shift on your feet under his steady gaze.

"So...?" you ask, moving your arms awkwardly behind your back like you're not sure what to do with them. "What do you think?"

What does he think?

Minho thinks you might just be the prettiest girl in the world. He thinks he must have been an idiot his whole life, to have spent most of his waking hours beside you and not once has he noticed how truly breathtaking you are. He thinks about the feeling that spreads in the pit of his stomach, sends warmth throughout his body and makes his heartbeat race a million miles an hours.

Your best friend blinks slowly as he savors the warmth that he's never experienced before. It's similar to the feeling you get when you're sitting under the shade of a big tree on a summer's day. It's comparable to the satisfied tranquility you get after you've just finished a hearty meal. A little hazy in your contentment.

It's not until you probe with a pointed Well? that Minho realizes he's been staring at you in silence for a few minutes now. He swallows thickly, willing away the words that he wants to say but they get lodged in his throat. He reckons it's weird to verbalize them, because it's not how the two of you function. You don't often utter that kind of sentiment out loud and he doesn't either. Never have and likely never will.

In the end, he bites his tongue. "You look presentable," is what he settles on.

You roll your eyes, then reward him with a laugh.

Minho doesn't care about love. He only cares about you.

Two.

Minho is 21 years old, and he's gotten used to his heart beating erratically whenever he's in your presence.

Three years flew by in the blink of an eye, and graduation is just around the corner. You've always done well in school, straight A student with a track record that most could only dream to have. You put in the hours, you do the work. You deserve everything that you've achieved.

But it's been a challenging few months for you both, being seniors and all. He's had to watch you struggle to stay on top of your classes while also having to slave over a thesis 24/7 until you were sure it was perfect. It reduced you to tears a few times, and Minho was there to hold your hand through it all.

He held you in his comforting embrace when you wanted to give up. He made you dinner when you were too immersed in your schoolwork to notice that you'd forgotten to eat. He was your biggest support system; if it weren't for him, you don't know if you would've made it through.

It's hot outside today, a little unbearable but not uncharacteristic for June. Minho waits in a familiar hallway, the same hall that he's walked past for hundreds of times over the past few years, the same hall that he won't see again once he holds a degree in his hands in only a few weeks' time.

As he sits on an old wooden bench, he bounces his leg as if he's one of the people in the classrooms that line the hall. He doesn't have to be on campus today, but here he is regardless because you're scheduled for your thesis defense this morning. You're in one of those rooms, probably also bouncing your leg from the overwhelming nerves. Minutes feel like hours; you went in there a while ago after he had sent you off with a pat on the head and an encouraging Godspeed.

He's nervous for you, but he's sure that you'll do great. Years of hard work accumulating in what must be the most important moment of your academic journey. You even stayed up all night last night, refusing to sleep a wink just to revise your arguments and talking points.

Minho's head snaps up instantly as he hears a door creak open, the sound of it reverberating throughout the empty hallway like a gong announcing your return from battle. It takes you a few seconds to step out of the room and into his line of sight. He can't see you very well with all this distance between you, but he can still make out the way your frame is visibly shaking with every step you take. He rises to his feet, and you break into a sprint.

He opens his arms wide - a hug of consolation or congratulations, he doesn't know yet - but he still can't seem to brace himself for the collision. You run straight into his embrace, your warms wounding around his middle tightly. Minho feels your tremors, hears your sniffles from where you're pressing your cheek against his shoulder.

"How did it go?" he asks gently.

You start crying then, and he doesn't know if the tears that his shirt is soaking up are those of joy or of grief, but he holds you through it anyway. He swears he can feel every single beat of your heart, hammering so wildly as you're pressed against him like you could sink into him if only you'd push just a little bit more.

"I passed," you say in between sobs. "I got an A."

Minho heaves out the breath that he's been holding ever since you entered that classroom, but it's not like he had any doubt about it to begin with. He hugs you tighter than he's ever had before, and he loves you just the same.

You two must look so dramatic, all wrapped up together in your own little bubble, but who the fuck cares? Although, when another student passes by and coughs, you do break away from him, a little embarrassed for a second.

Even with your hair all mussed up and your flushed cheeks stained with tears, he still thinks you look the same as you did when you were 18 at your sister's wedding. The prettiest girl in the world.

Minho wipes away the wetness on your face with his sleeves, then swipes with gentle thumbs at the moisture that's gathered along your lash lines.

"Holy fucking shit," you breathe out, your shoulders sagging with evident relief, so much more relaxed now that you've done it. "I can't believe it's finally over."

Your best friend can't entirely agree, because he's always believed in you. He's had faith in you since the beginning, since you were mere children laughing and crying together on the playground. You were meant to do great things, this was always crystal clear to Minho.

I love you, he thinks as he smooths a hand over your hair, his chest swelling with nothing but pride and fondness for you. You did so well.

But it's not what he ends up telling you. He swallows it down, washes it away with a dose of regret and longing. He's still not the type to express sappy sentiments, and he's grown accustomed to adoring you only in secret.

"Let's go," he says softly. "I'll buy you dinner."

Minho is still young, he's still got his whole life ahead of him, but he knows what love is now. He knows that it's you.

Three.

Minho is 24 years old, and he finds it hard to make peace with the fact that you're starting to get out there, that you're finally going on dates now that academics aren't taking up most of your time anymore.

To be fair, none of the guys you've seen have been graced with a second date, and Minho thanks his lucky stars whenever you return from a night out and text him a simple Not it. He knows that it wasn't your decision in the first place, that your mom and your sister have been setting you up on blind dates because they want to see you bring a boyfriend home.

You complain about it all the time, whining about how you're not interested but your family is adamant on it. Minho is well aware, and yet, there's a part of him that's a little shaken, because what if? What if the universe miscalculates and the stars misalign just enough in his misfortune for you to cross paths with someone who's absolutely perfect for you? Someone who's a good man that can give you what you've always deserved to have.

He really doesn't know what he would do if that happens. When it happens?

He doesn't know why you're here tonight either, sitting on a chair on the other side of his kitchen island in a pretty dress when you're supposed to be going on a date in half an hour. The guy apparently works for a big record label, some producer that your sister knows through a friend of a friend.

You look indifferent, kind of bored, as you watch Minho makes dinner for himself. "You seem miserable," he comments, taking a quick break from chopping vegetables to glance up at you. You do look a bit miserable, but you're still the most beautiful in his eyes.

You throw your head back and groan loudly, "Because I am. God, I don't know why they keep making me do this. These guys always give nothing."

"Please elaborate."

"They're all boring suits with tedious routines." you say, and as absentminded as your tone is, it sounds a little pointed to Minho's ears. "They don't make me laugh."

Do they not make you laugh, or do they not make you laugh more than I can?

"Then don't go," he snickers, though there's no humor in his voice at all. "These guys sound like duds. Just tell your sister to fuck off."

"Do you mean that? Do you really think I shouldn't go?"

And there's something in your gaze, something so suddenly expectant in the way you're looking at him that makes Minho wonder. If he says yes, would you listen? Would you stay here with him? Would you stay here for him?

I'm serious. Don't go. You can have this and I'll make myself ramyeon. Just be here with me.

You both stare at each other on either side of his kitchen island for an infinite stretch of time. He feels like your eyes are trying to tell him something that he can't decipher, as if they're sending him signals in a language that he never learned how to read.

For a second there, he indulges himself. He pretends that you're only asking because you want to hear him say it. That you want him to put up a fight and not let you go.

But he bites his tongue because it's become a bad habit. A habit that he can't shake because he simply doesn't have the courage to do so. Because if you stay here tonight, looking like that under the cozy lighting of his living room, he might just spill his secrets and he wouldn't be able to take it when reality comes crashing down and you end up telling him that you've never felt the same way.

"I'm kidding," he musters up the words, and tries to plaster on a smile for your sake, even though he's not sure if you really believe it. "You're dressed up anyway. Go and get a free fancy dinner, if anything."

Minho knows what love is, but his love has always lived in the shadows, his longing has only existed in the dark that it terrifies him just thinking about it meeting the light.

Four.

Minho is 26 years old, and he's been a coward for the better part of a decade.

Maybe he's loved you for even longer, but he has spent the past eight years head over heels in love with you, and not once has he done anything about it. Never been able to gather enough courage to ask you out, never even hinted at his feelings for you. He loves you from his place by your side and yet, you've never known.

He loves you the most, but he loves you in the worst way that a person can love another - he loves you in silence.

You're the prettiest girl in the world, and Lee Minho is a pathetic coward.

All these years, he's kept quiet and for what? There's always a spot reserved for him right next to you and yet, it feels like he can only watch you from the sidelines, far away from where it really matters, because he doesn't think he can fit into your life the way he truly wants. You taught him what love was, and love, to Minho, is unattainable. Something he can spend the rest of his life yearning for but won't ever have.

Love hurts. Sometimes, all love does is hurt.

"I would've taken you to a nice restaurant if you asked, you know," he says, putting a chocolate cupcake on the coffee table in front of you before he sits down next to you on the fluffy carpet of your living room. He pulls out a candle next, placing it right in the center of the sweet treat.

Your gaze follows his hand has he lights the candle, your eyes glinting with excitement as though you're a child again and your favorite day of the year is still your birthday. The tiny flame curves and bends, dancing to a rhythm that looks like only you can hear. You watch the candle like it's magic, while Minho just watches you, thinking the same thing.

He watches as you close your eyes and clasp your hands together for the theatrics, then you blow out the flame seconds later with a swift breath.

You turn to him with a smile, "I don't need a nice restaurant. This is perfect."

He blinks, and there's that warmth simmering in his belly again. He first felt it when he was 18, and he feels it now. He feels it almost every moment that he spends with you, and he reckons it's only reasonable, because you're his home personified and love can still be beautiful even when it hurts. There's his heart racing again, but that's nothing new to Minho.

He muses over your words. Perfect. Just one simple word is enough to get his hopes up in a way that it really shouldn't.

Your definition of a birthday well spent is in your cozy apartment, eating takeout pizza with your best friend. Perfect, to you, is him baking you a singular chocolate cupcake upon your request and being with him within these four walls, where his fingers occasionally brush yours when you sit next to each other.

Oh, Minho would follow you to the ends of the earth if you asked him to.

He clears his throat lightly, breaking away from your gaze that's full of gratitude and childlike wonder. "What did you wish for?"

"I'm not gonna tell you. It won't come true then."

Wishes don't come true anyway, he thinks, but obviously he won't say it out loud to you, and on your birthday no less. Instead, he diverts his attention to the cupcake, subconsciously tonguing his cheek as he takes a small chunk of the sweet and offers it to you.

You let him feed you even though your eyes are narrowed. "What was that look?" you ask.

"What look?"

"You had a look."

"No, I didn't," Minho insists.

"Yes, you did. You wanted to say something, didn't you?"

He shrugs, popping a piece of cupcake into his own mouth. The answer is yes, he did want to say something, but if you want to get technical about it, then he's wanted to say something for years now. He asks you the same thing every birthday, What did you wish for?, and you would refuse to tell him every time.

"Wishes don't come true," he verbalizes it this time, with a voice that's lighthearted on purpose despite knowing that you wouldn't take it that seriously either way.

You roll your eyes. "Now you're just being pessimistic."

"What? I'm speaking from experience."

"You've never had a birthday wish come true?"

"My birthday wishes haven't come true since I was 18."

Minho feels your eyes on the side of his face, and when you remain quiet for a beat too long, he turns his attention back to you. "What?"

"How do you know they didn't come true?"

"Because..."

Because you've been my wish for almost a decade now. I didn't use to believe in wishes but I always believed in you. Every year, I wish for you to look at me the way I look at you, but it never comes true. Every year, I wish that you would love me back, not just as a friend, but you never do. You are my wish, but you're also the very reason why I know wishes don't come true.

Then he's laughing, but nothing is remotely funny about this. It's your birthday and suddenly all he can think about is how much it stings to be reminded that you're the only thing he'll ever wish for, and still, maybe this simple wish is absurd enough that the universe will never grant him what he truly wants.

"Never mind," he says. "This whole thing is silly."

There he goes, biting his tongue again. Coward.

"No, what were you going to say?"

"You're so bossy today," Minho pretends to complain.

"It's my birthday. Tell me," you press on, and suddenly he can't find any appreciation for your stubbornness that he's adored all his life. You keep your eyes fixed on him when all he wants to do is hide from you.

What is he supposed to say to you? What can he even say? That he's spent more than a third of his life hopelessly enamored with you? That the second he utters any of this out loud, he knows it will be the end of your friendship?

And Minho can't afford to lose you. Even if it hurts, he would rather let love hurt than live in the absence of you.

"Eat your cupcake," he says instead. "I'll get some ice cream."

He makes a move to get up, and the bad habit further cements its place in his subconscious. He's always running away from you when you're supposed to be the person he can be the most open with. This is how he knows he doesn't deserve you.

But you reach for his wrist and it makes him still, the feeling of your hand sliding downward to hold onto his fingers. He's used to the feeling of your smaller hand in his, used to how he can hear his heartbeat in his ears whenever you lace your fingers together.

What he isn't accustomed to, is the look on your face this very second, akin to the one you wore two years ago as you sat on the other side of his kitchen island, asking him if you should go.

Expectant and hopeful; you're holding something back too.

The words that slip from your lips are ones that he never imagined you would say to him.

"I've waited for you long enough."

His poor excuse of retrieving ice cream is all but forgotten as he stares at you, doe-eyed and despairingly confused. "What is that supposed to mean?"

You take a breath, and Minho wonders if this is how he looked every time he wanted to say something only to back down in the end.

Then it all comes rushing out.

"For a while, I thought there might've been something between us, something more than just friendship. I don't know why I thought that, I just had a feeling. On the day of our graduation, I thought you would finally kiss me or at least say something, but you didn't. Whenever I went on dates, I wanted you to tell me not to go, that I was wasting my time with those guys that couldn't make me laugh because they weren't you. You never said anything, you never did anything. I waited every birthday just like I waited tonight. You're still holding it over me and I'm starting to wonder if you really love me too or if I imagined everything this whole time."

Your voice gets smaller toward the end, almost as if the uncertainty takes over you the longer he remains silent. He doesn't have the words for it, doesn't really have the mental capacity to process all of what you just professed. Years and years of longing, of hoping that you would come running into his arms the same way you did on the morning of your thesis defense, and it turns out that you were always the one waiting for him to reach you.

If you really love me too.

Your fingers start to loosen around his but Minho doesn't let you get away, not now and not ever again. Not when he finally knows that he's burnt up enough of your time just because he was too stuck in his head to see that you were holding a hand out for him all along.

He pulls you into his orbit and he likes to imagine that somewhere out there in the infinite universe, two stars collide when he kisses you for the first time, long overdue but still heavenly nonetheless.

He's crying but you don't seem to mind the tears. You're kissing him back and it's really all that matters. He can't think straight but he adores you to the point that his lungs ache.

"I love you," he mumbles against your lips. The sentiment comes out clumsy, half coherent but wholeheartedly sincere. "I'm sorry. I love you, I love you, fuck, I love you."

You're the one who breaks the kiss first, with your hand on his chest gently pushing him away. Panic instantly shoots through him like a lightning strike. These are the words he's been holding back for years, did he not even say them right? Did he fuck things up yet again?

You brush the tears from his cheeks, your voice so impossibly soft when you ask, "Do you mean it?"

Minho splinters into a million pieces, of course he does.

Your name falls from his lips, sounding like a prayer, like the most tender plea that's ever been uttered, "I love you the most. I'm so in love with you that it hurts. I've been yours for so long and I never said anything. Fuck, I-I'm sorry. I love you so much. I'm sorry. I-"

You bring his face to yours once more, shushing him with a kiss that makes him putty in your hands. You tell him that it's okay, and you kiss him like you forgive him. The world could be ending right now, and he doesn't think that either of you would even care very much.

Because you're the only wish of his life, and you kiss him as though you want to make up for the lost years. Because Minho feels like he's 18 again and you're the most beautiful girl in the world, wearing a smile that leaves him breathless in the most wonderful way possible.

all rights reserved © withleeknow. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 06.05.2024]

[aethelwyneleigh27]

Cod Characters General Dating Headcanons (part one)

+ Random and Some bits of Chubby Fem S/O Headcanons with mentions of different nationality S/O

+ What type of BF/GF they would be

Including John Price, Simon "Ghost" Riley, John "Soap" MacTavish, Kyle "Gaz" Garrick, Alejandro Vargas, Rodolfo "Rudy" Parra

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3

Fem terms and pronouns like she/her are used for the reader

ꕥ HOPE YOU ENJOY! ꕥ

My rules for requests and characters I can write for

Please comment if you want to be added to the taglist, the next part or cod content alone.

Taglist: @marshmallowinamess

A/n: Hi lovelies! Lia here, I'm back after a nerve-wracking week of school. This is a bit short but I hope you enjoy it otherwise. God I fucking hate school. I wrote all of this in a cold room, a heat pad on me (because period cramps) and at 3am so any mistakes will be edited out as soon as I'm aware of it.

This is divided into a multiple part thing (I think 2-3?) because God knows I can't fit them all in one post because of the limited amount of gifs and photos. I'll add more to these in the future, some are longer than others because I can't think. Also because I can't write them all at once, that's a lot to write okay 😭

Disclaimers/warnings: Typical Cod things, OOC characters???, Unrealistic, Some suggestive themes and language, I'm so sorry but English is not my first language so please don't come after me. Most of the content I've seen are on TikTok and Tumblr I don't actually play the game but I love the characters so much, same with any other content I have for other video games.

Tiny sidenote: the reader in this has been describe to be shorter than the characters and has been mentioned to have a soft body rather than the muscular type.

John Price

ꕥ (OH MY GOD LOOK AT HIS SMILEEE) (He's such a quokka)

ꕥ Price who literally is such a father figure, doesn't matter whether the relationship between you two is romantic or platonic. He often takes the dominant caring role.

ꕥ Doesn't smoke around you, doesn't matter if you insist he doesn't. He still won't and definitely will criticize you if you try or do smoke because he doesn't want you do end up like him.

ꕥ If there's a bit of an age gap between you, I'd say he's hesitant. Definitely afraid of what the rest of the task force thinks (He can't help it, they're basically his boys)

ꕥ John Price who wants to settle down with you, maybe have kids if you want but just a white picket fence life with you without the chaos that is war and his job.

ꕥ He only ever let's you have his hat, only when he gives it to you though. Most of the time it would be while you're out, he'd put it on your head from his. (Cowboy hat rule? I heard that in more respectful terms rather than sexual, it respectfully means that you are theirs)

ꕥ John Price who rests his chin at the top of your head no matter how much he needs to crouch down whenever hugging you from behind. Love doing it whenever you're busy doing something too. (Props for the effort because you cannot tell me he doesn't have back, neck and knee pains)

ꕥ Is constantly worried if you share the same line of work, like at first it was nothing but a tiny crush and slowly he finds himself caring about your well-being more and more over time.

ꕥ Can't help but think he's an acts of service type of guy, reaching up for things you need or better yet lifting you up so you can reach them and loves opening things for you like bottles or anything canned. (Girlies who get their nails done or wear press ons know this struggle ( I'm a press on girly)

ꕥ The kind of man who would turn on some oldies music and slow dance with you in the living room, your footsteps and breathing being the only other sounds as you smile at each other, foreheads against the other's.

Simon "Ghost" Riley

ꕥ Ghost who is such Doberman/Black cat boyfriend. Like have you seen this man? He's so tall and intimidating, one distasteful look from him and if it was physically possible that person would drop dead.

ꕥ Ghost whose a chubby chaser through and through, he just looks for something different from what he's used to.

ꕥ Is definitely a tits kinda guy, doesn't matter how big or how small they are. He'll definitely play with them in some way during doing the you know what.

ꕥ Feels like you can take him and his size better because of your plush body. Has a size kink and likes seeing it bulge a bit when he's inside you.

ꕥ You're just so soft and warm, he wants something away from what he usually feels doing his job. Not really that touchy but he gets quite clingy within closed doors.

ꕥ Likes to squeeze your thighs, his grip on them would not falter. Doesn't matter whether it's in a sexual or domestic way.

ꕥ Thinks you deserve better than what he can offer and needs constant reassurance, never says it out loud but you pick up on what he feels. (please be patient with him)

ꕥ More often than not, he thinks you're quite fragile. Even if you can protect yourself, one of his ways of showing you he loves you is through protecting you. Hence the Doberman boyfriend scenario.

ꕥ Doesn't like PDA but knows when it's necessary, him placing his arm around your shoulder is enough to keep perverts in their places. If that rando is really that bold then they'll most likely end up with a few broken bones depending on how pissed Simon is.

ꕥ If you work alongside him, he'd constantly worry about your well-being but at the same time is conflicted because he's confident that he can protect you.

ꕥ Only you and the TF141 can call him Simon, he still feels uneasy when he gets called that but when it's you saying it, it doesn't sound as daunting to him. Still dislikes in in certain tones of voice because his name reminds him of his past.

ꕥ You've seen his face, it took a long time but after that he trusted you enough to show him. The fact that you didn't find his face revolting and even kissed his scars while cupping his face was enough for him to want to marry you.

ꕥ Isn't fully insecure about his face but has his moments. (You know like the voice line where soap asks him to take off his mask and asked him if he was ugly and Ghost said "Negative")

ꕥ Takes a little while to get him to open up and little things like letting you hold him takes him a bit of time to get used to because it makes him feel vulnerable.

ꕥ God forbid something were to happen to you and he couldn't do anything to stop it, Simon would lose his fucking mind.

John "Soap" MacTavish

ꕥ Soap is a Golden Retriever boyfriend through and through. He's energetic, loyal and really affectionate.

ꕥ He's a lighthearted flirt at first because he doesn't wanna scare you off but damn does he gradually get bolder over time.

ꕥ Very hands on, touchy, and could be clingy at times unless you don't consent him, secretly always finding new ways to touch you.

ꕥ A sucker for cheek kisses, lips are his favorite but he can't help but break out a wide grin whenever you kiss his cheek. Can't help but feel kinda manly whenever you do.

ꕥ Adores making you laugh, no matter how stupid your sense of humor is he will absolutely say that joke if it gets a laugh out of you. Would be concerned if you had a dark sense of humor but will eventually get used to it. To describe it, hearing you laugh makes his heart feel full like in a content domestic way.

ꕥ Also, see the gif? You cannot tell me that he doesn't look at you that way because he absolutely would.

ꕥ Loves your weight against his body to the pint he's begging you to lay on him. You, him in the bed while he's shirtless with grey sweatpants on and you in your night clothes sharing each other's warmth with your head on his broad chest.

ꕥ Shows you silly and cute pet videos, especially the cat ones:

"[Name], look at this one!"

"Soap, we're not adopting a pet. Not right now at least"

ꕥ He was upset and gave you puppy eyes the whole time because the only time he had pet was when he was child, it was a hamster which was killed because it got sucked into the vacuum by his older sister.

ꕥ You're the only one allowed to tough his hair, he's very proud of his mohawk and will let you style it. Won't wear it out if you did something silly to it though.

ꕥ Soap who loves showing you off to everyone, loves light PDA but doesn't wanna potential put a target on your back.

ꕥ He definitely is the guy you want to take home to your family and friends (or found family <3), he's funny and easy to get along with. Very flirty with you but he'll straighten out because he's terrified on making a bad impression.

Kyle "Gaz" Garrick

ꕥ (HE'S SO FREAKING UNDERRATED WITHIN THIS FANDOM)

ꕥ He gives Labrador boyfriend vibes, you can't help but want to take care of him.

ꕥ Gaz who literally had to do a double take when he first saw you, he turned to Soap with that "Are you seeing what I'm seeing?" look in a good way.

ꕥ Gaz who literally had to ask you out multiple times before you said yes thinking he's only doing it for a bet or a cruel joke.

ꕥ Constant reassurance from him because he doesn't want you to feel insecure about your looks because to him you are literally an angel.

ꕥ Loves to chill with you, cuddling and just relaxing. Maybe scrolling on TikTok occasionally and show you the funny ones he chuckled at.

ꕥ He has a sixth sense whenever you crave something, say you want chocolate or drink of some sort then he'd definitely being home whatever it is you we're craving without having to ask you.

ꕥ Kyle who has your Starbucks order memorized because he likes being the one to order things for you. Will playfully argue with you on who'll pay this time. (Don't even try anymore, he always wins anyway)

ꕥ Puts his hat on your head mostly when you're out, has done it the first time because it was hot out and the sun was in your eyes. He's picked it up from Price and once you smiled at him through the shade of his cap, he has not stopped doing it.

ꕥ Definitely a words of affirmation and acts of service kind of guy when it comes to love languages. Sometimes whenever he'd give you two thumbs up and a cheeky smile, you can't help but laugh a little.

ꕥ He's very thoughtful, so much so that he prides himself in knowing you better than anyone. Everytime you two go out to eat, when he gets something and know that you'll want to taste it (he knows damn well whether you'll like it or not when he tastes it) he'll bring it upon himself to order you one before you even say you want some.

ꕥ Soft snores when he sleeps, it's cute but you know damn well he's tired. Also I think he's very cuddly, like he just likes reminding himself that he's not alone and that his bed is warm because you're in it. Therefore at minimum always has an arm around you in bed.

ꕥ Dances in the rain with you and loves it when you pull him gently on his arm while your hands are intertwined. Takes note of how the the raindrops sometimes fall on your lashes while you look up at him smiling.

ꕥ Kyle Garrick who wants nothing more in the world to see you happy and smiling. His "this is the woman I'm going to marry" moment was when you baked his favorite cake for his birthday despite it being so hard, you nailed it perfectly. (Whether it's out of luck or skill is up to you)

Alejandro Vargas

ꕥ (idk how to write for this angry Mexican man but I'll try my best, love him and his megamind hairline though <3)

ꕥ Alejandro is definitely a flirt, a very bold on at that. He's quite forward when it comes to liking someone so yeah.

ꕥ He lives for it when you boss him around. That being said, he isn't picky about body type or any of the sort.

ꕥ Will teach you Spanish if you don't know any, definitely prioritizes the curse words and laughs whenever you jokingly call him pendejo.

ꕥ Wouldn't mind you teaching him your own culture and mother tongue. Bonus points if it's similar to his.

ꕥ Has Spanish nicknames for you because I imagine his own culture is important to him.

ꕥ Would hate it if you had the same line of work but will never take it out on you, it's just that it's so dangerous given the people he's involved with. (It's definitely Valeria)

ꕥ Speaking of El Sinombre, I don't think they had anything romantic going on. It's mainly platonic and the "betrayal" sucked on Alejandro's side. They definitely had some rivalry and the tension was through the roof. (Mainly because I headcanon Valeria as Lesbian)

ꕥ Can be so romantic when he tries, you can't tell me this mf ain't a smooth talker because he definitely is. Can be very blunt like in a forward way with his affection too.

ꕥ Likes kissing your wrist and feeling your pulse against his lips because it reminds him you're alive. (The amount of angst this scenario carries would be something I'm up for to write)

ꕥ Is sent on a fit of rage when something happens to you, say you got kidnapped then this man would tears off the walls of every building if he had to.

Rodolfo "Rudy" Parra

ꕥ (ANOTHER UNDERATED CHARACTER)

ꕥ Another Golden Retriever boyfriend. This man is just loving and dotting, very husband material.

ꕥ Loves chubby women, has a soft spot for them and just likes holding them.

ꕥ He's definitely used to the insecurity that comes with the body, also doesn't get why such beauty standards are even in place. Has and would fuck the insecure out of you again if he had to. (It's in a very gentle and loving manner)

ꕥ If you hold him in your arms, he'd be absolutely living for it. He already has had a long day and being honest he hasn't had many lovers that went far so having you care in this way about him would have him wrapped around your finger.

ꕥ Worships the ground you walk on. That's it.

ꕥ Would take everything to heart whenever you teach him or mention something within your culture if you aren't of Spanish origins like he is. He just loves you so much that it makes him happy knowing more about you.

ꕥ Would adore slow dancing with you, brings him back to reality where he realizes that he has you and that you're there.

ꕥ Terrified that one day you'll end up leaving him so reassurance would be much appreciated by him.

ꕥ Definitely a sucker for receiving forehead kisses, as for giving he likes to kiss the back of your hand.

ꕥ If ever danger presents itself to you too closely, he would have a heart attack like full on crying but not in public though.

[sincerelybubbles]

i just think that james would make the best boyfriend. and i know it's not a new thought or even an uncommon one, everyone knows james loves fast and he loves deep, but i cannot help but imagine how healthy your relationship would be with him.

like, yes, when he picks you he's fiercely protective and obsessed with you beyond belief. he's always touching you, skin to skin, pouting when you're holding his hand because you're wearing gloves and he wants to feel you ("I'll put your hand in my pocket," he whines when you explain that your hand is just cold. you give him a fake glare but three minutes later, tops, you're holding his hand, no gloves, in his hoodie pocket and he's walking around with the biggest grin on his face, all white teeth on display). he compliments you every time you turn a corner for everything you do, he drops anything and everything for you the second you even breathe like you might need something. his professions of love are as breathtaking as they are frequent ("i just love the way you exist," he whispers in the morning, smoothing your hair out of your face, "i mean, it's 7 in the morning and usually i'm struggling to open my eyes but your hair is frizzy and i know where all of your freckles are and i can't wait to count them, you know?").

but i think beyond that, there's a sort of solidness that comes from healing together. from finding the flaws in your relationships, testing them until the cracks widen enough for you two to patch together, and relishing in the firmness of what used to be weak. james overwork himself. he used to spend restless hours finishing work at home, dejectedly pushing you off in fear of letting down his coworkers. working at the gym until his muscles screamed, unable to even lift his fork for dinner without his pecs screaming at him. planning dates and activities on your days off together to the point where you felt like you couldn't breathe. everything done with the lacing of care, tinged with the effort he put into every moment of life. it felt wrong for you to comment on at first. he tries so hard all of the time to do everything for everyone -- be everything for everyone, even himself. good things, at their core, that you didn't want to rub the shine out of by getting your fingerprints on. but you watched him fracture and put him back together when the effort became too much and crumpled his facade. you taught him self-restraint, reminded him to allow you to take some of the burden, showed him the simple pleasure of taking up space together without thinking of how every moment could be maximized. in turn, he helped you with sleep. self-confidence. how to talk through hurt feelings instead of lashing out.

james wouldn't let comments turn into fights. ("what do you mean when you say that?" he asks instead, sitting beside you and ducking his head to meet your eye, be at your level. his fingertips rest on your forearm, skin-to-skin like always. eyes open, alert, lips pressed together to tell you he's confused, doesn't agree, but posture telling you he's willing to listen more than he's willing to escalate). and when fights happen, of course they happen, you've taught him it's okay to walk away. it's not defeat. neither of you leave the flat, only to separate rooms, but it usually only takes 20 minutes before you're reaching out again, missing his warm fingers settling on the soft place behind your ear as he messes with your hair while you talk, and you're whispering your way through the problem. untangling to the root like it's a tangled group of threads, working through it together,

so, yeah, i can't stop thinking about how james would be such a good boyfriend. for the obvious reasons, always, but for the ones deeper from the surface. for the reasons that would cause issues first and how ready he would be to dive in and make the faults strengths of their own as well.

not edited, not proof read, i'm so sorry it's 1am and i can't stop thinking about him

[nightmarist]

Some Zevlor Things —

EDIT 12/2/23: Added a few more things

A fellow Tiefling Hellrider, Tilses, is with him in the caves acting as his bodyguard. He sometimes calls her Tilly.

There is one bedroll in the caves shoved off in the far corner with a book titled "The Devil You Know: An Autobiography" - not sure if it's his personal writing or if he's reading it, either way it adds to the flavor of his of his tiefling pride (and/or anguish).

It reads:

Have you ever had a god change your blood? It is a horrifying thing, even for those who may desire it. Yet few tieflings wished for Asmodeus to claim their bodies, only be given no choice in the matter. It is not as if we were well-loved before the archdevil's gambit. Our people have always struggled against the notion of 'devilkin', as if a single drop of infernal ichor inescapably corrupts. How amusing, when so many others willingly sell their souls to fiends, yet their culture as a whole escapes the blame. By what method can we redeem ourselves, when the crime is not ours? I would drive a blade into every warlock that aided Asmodeus' damned ritual, but personal vengeance cannot undo the will of a god, much less one as slippery as the Lord of Lies. When every passerby thinks you a thief and heretic, it is deeply tempting to become one. (cut off) The only thing that has stopped me is knowing Asmodeus wants nothing more than for all of us to fall from grace.

Around the his table are Invasion Plans for Elturgard, Traveler's Guide to Baldur's Gate, Traveler's Guide to the Sword Coast Vol IV: The Risen Road (which aligns when he tells you earlier there are gnolls on the road), and "Front and Center: a Thespian's Memoir" that reads:

"... in fact, the greatest joy of my life hasn't been acting, but becoming. When you choose a character to play, you don't just wear a mask - you take a little bit of their soul for your own. Whoever you are in your heart of hearts, if only by the faintest note."

Zevlor aside I think this is a sweet quote for the player and player character relationship <3

Dialogue in the Caves:

Zevlor: I Hardly need a bodyguard, Tilses. This isn't Avernus. Tilses: No sir. At least the monsters there looked like monsters.

—

Tilses: Commander— Zevlor: Just Zevlor, Tilly. We're civilians now, remember? Tilses: With respect, sir — being a Hellrider is for life. They can't take — Zevlor: They can, and did. Avernus changed things — best we get used to that. Tilses: ... Yes, Zevlor

—

Tilses: The Watch or the Flaming Fist? Zevlor: Pardon? Tilses: When we get to Baldur's Gate. Where are we enlisting? Zevlor: I'm done soldiering, Tilly. I'd like a clean start. But go with the Watch. You're too honest to be a mercenary.

—

Zevlor: No word from the scouts, yet? Tilses: No sir. But if there's a clear path past the goblins, they'll find it. Zevlor: Yes, of course.

ITEMS —

in the Chest there is a bronze goblet, 46 gold, and a battle-worn blade. On his person he has his gloves (Hellrider's Pride), an apple, a camp supply pack, and the key to his chest.

The blade says:

A fine by well-used sword. It seemed to have once belonged to a holy order, but the indication of rank and patron deity at the hilt have recently been filed down.

The gloves' flavor text says:

A waft of sulphur emanates from this proudly-kept piece.

Celebration at the Camp:

"I should be out there, talking with them. In... Just a moment, maybe." "Is this everyone? Our numbers have grown so few..." "No more. I can't afford to lose any more of them." "No. Let them have fun. I'll be ruining it come morning anyway."

Mindfayer Colony:

Things he mumbles in the Pod:

The pod will show you his memories of Elturel:

After saving Zevlor, I forced myself to pick the "mean" options just to see how it goes.

If you tell him its his fault tieflings were imprisoned in moonrise, he says:

If you tell him "Do yo have a right to ask?" when he asks about the tieflings:

He doesn't argue with any of your remarks except one, when he says "For a moment I welcomed it" and you tell him "For a moment until you realized your reward would be a tadpole" he corrects you:

If you tell him if he wanted power he should live up to his own ideal:

If you tell him to get out of your sight:

When you tell him it's not his fault he was enthralled:

If you tell him "Fine. Good luck, Zevlor."

If you say you could use another blade in the fight to come:

At the Netherbrain:

(smiling <3)

"The journey has been brutal, but I stand here a Hellrider once more, and I would die a proud man if I died this day."

I know it's a Soldier thing to be proud to die for a cause but it still makes me worry for him given his background so far <:]

If you click on him, he has two unvoiced lines:

if you pickpocket him at this point, he'll have the same items on him as before (in this save he has a carrot instead of an apple for me).

His stats at this time: (Steeped in Bliss is from one of my items)

Post Game (Patch 5)

I don't know if there are other permutations of this letter, yet, but this is what I received:

I hope my penmanship has improved somewhat in the past months. When I first stumbled into this city, I shook so badly that I could scarcely hold the soup the priests pressed into my hands - let alone write and thank you as you deserve. It is only when the city itself began to shake that I felt my hands grow still. Along with the other veterans sheltering at the temple - discards of Elturel's 'unworthy' legions - I watched that monstrosity rise over the city. We felt no fear. Only anger. Disgust. Purpose - and with it, power. I do not know what oath we cling to now, or how long it will last - but we shall use it to ensure that this city will not suffer as Elturel did. Whether it wants us or not. It is more than thanks alone I owe. No words can make amends for what I did to my people, but that is as it should be. More come to the temple every day to aid in the relief efforts, and if I am permitted to work alongside them, then I am content. Come and see us, when you can. Zevlor

It's interesting — if not bitterswet, tragic, and inspiring — to hear that Zevlor and other Paladins regained their Oaths via pure, stubborn devotion to saving people when it began to look as bad as Elturel.

[yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere]

❤️🤍💙 #RWRB #RWRBMovie #RedWhiteAndRoyalBlue

Casey being iconic-i just love Them so much!!

#CaseyMcQuiston

. https://twitter.com/ThisIsGSage23/status/1791335511728013403?s=19 .

"I just really wanted to explore both of those characters and I wanted to do it in a way that I hadn't really seen before, and also just like as a queer person I want to make queer art and that's what I'm drawn and that's what I'm interested in. So I kind of had these two different ideas, it was like one idea was that I would write a book about this rebellious first kid who's like figuring out that they're queer and what does that mean for their like political aspirations; and the other was about you know sort of a member of the royal family under all of this pressure to carry on this legacy and like what does that mean if they're gay. Um-And I'm just like kind of weighing these two different stories and deciding where I wanted to go and then I just kind of had this moment of like What If I didn't have to choose and it was the same story because they fall in love with each other? And-Um-You know in a classic bisexual fashion I was like I'm gonna have both, so I did!"

"It was really important to me that Alex was explicitly bisexual because like, you know, I really wanted the representation of like this bisexual character and then it was important to me that he was also Mexican like he is in the book and that he was played by a Mexican actor. (..) It was really important to me that, um, I didn't want any, I didn't want Alex or Henry, no matter how their stories were translated to the screen, I didn't want either of them to have any type of, um, like shame or resentment towards themselves for being queer, it was really important to me that the stakes of their lives and their like inner conflict was much more based on like the circumstances that they're in. It's like they don't hate themselves for being gay-or for being bi-they just wish that it was easier to be who they were in the world that they live in."

"..Taylor embodies that so beautifully. (..) I think he's just killer in that role. And Nick, I mean, if you like turned me upside down and shook me like he would fall out my brain as Henry (..) doesn't have blue eyes but they sure are sad eyes and that is exactly what they need to be."

"I see myself in Alex, tremendously, I'm very much in Alex, I relate to him so much, uh, truly, I think he's the most like me of all my characters."

"I very much would love screenwriting to become part of what I do, I'll say it that way."

BTW for everyone interested: Red, White & Royal Blue: Collector's Edition Henry PoV bonus chapter by Casey Mcquiston : https://www.tumblr.com/yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere/752528941905018880?source=share

CMQ spotify (characters' playlists!!) https://open.spotify.com/user/p873j0jdmqn5hye7cakdnub7e/playlists

+ also queer history/facts from RWRB(Alex engaging with queer history)(thank you SO. MUCH. CASEY MCQUISTON!!)-GREAT POST here on tumblr!!-many links here, lots of information! (Waterloo Vase, Stonewall, SCOTUS decision 2015, Walt Whitman, Laws of Illinois 1961, The White Nights Riots, Paris Is Burning, THAT David Wojnarowicz photo 'If I Die Of AIDS-Forget Burial-Just Drop My Body On The Steps Of The F.D.A' https://www.tumblr.com/yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere/757305651356729344?source=share (I encourage you to research more about David!!) , Thisbe & Pyramus, The V & A, James I & George Villiers and MORE!!) https://www.tumblr.com/yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere/757308307835895808?source=share (Learning about things referenced in Red, White & Royal Blue, thank you @ elipheleh)

+https://www.vulture.com/article/casey-mcquiston-red-white-and-royal-blue-the-pairing-interview.html

+https://www.hollywoodreporter.com/movies/movie-features/taylor-zakhar-perez-casey-mcquiston-interview-red-white-royal-blue-1235975977/

.https://www.tumblr.com/yourartmatters-itswhatgotmehere/758778031058862080?source=share

+

[simpforfandom231]

Rapp's Curse PT1

Pairing: Reneé Rapp x fem!reader

warning: none just reneé being protective and cute over her girlf summary: Y/N is a student and together with Reneé Rapp. When Y/N runs into her ex Kate at campus, Kate gets really rude to Y/N and Reneé well, she just wants to speak her mind to the bitchy girl ------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The sun had barely begun to rise as Reneé pulled up to the university entrance in her sleek Black edition Range Rover. The campus was quiet, save for a few early risers and the chirping of birds. Y/n, her girlfriend, sat beside her, her eyes still heavy with sleep but a smile gracing her lips.

"Thanks for the ride, babe," Y/n said, her voice soft and warm as she leaned over to give Reneé a quick kiss.

Reneé grinned back, the corners of her eyes crinkling with affection. "Anytime, cutie. Have a great day at school."

Y/n gathered her backpack and glanced at the time on her phone. "I'll see you later. My first class doesn't start until 9, but I have a long day ahead. I won't be done until 6."

Reneé nodded, understanding. "Got it. I'll be finishing up in the studio around 6:05, so I might need a few minutes to wrap things up. Will you be okay waiting for me?"

Y/n chuckled, tucking a loose strand of hair behind her ear. "Of course. I'll just hang out at the entrance until you arrive. It'll give me time to catch up on some reading."

As Y/n stepped out of the car, her best friend Kimberly came into view, already waiting at the drop-off spot on campus. Kimberly waved excitedly, her curly hair bouncing with each movement.

"Hey, Y/n!" Kimberly called out, her voice filled with enthusiasm. "Ready for another thrilling day of academia?"

Y/n grinned, returning the wave. "Absolutely. Although, I could do without the early mornings."

Kimberly laughed, her eyes sparkling with mischief. "Tell me about it. But hey, at least we get to spend the day together, right?"

Y/n nodded, linking her arm with Kimberly's as they made their way towards the entrance. "Definitely. And who knows, maybe today will be the day we finally uncover the secrets of ancient civilizations."

Kimberly gasped dramatically, her hand flying to her chest. "I can feel it in my bones! Today is the day we become legends in the world of academia."

As Y/n and Kimberly strolled through the campus, the scent of freshly brewed coffee wafted through the air, drawing them towards the cozy campus coffee shop. The morning sun cast a warm glow over the bustling courtyard, students bustling about with books in hand and laughter in the air.

"So, when are you going to tell Ayla about you and Reneé?" Kimberly asked, her voice tinged with curiosity as she sipped on her steaming cup of latte.

Y/n hesitated for a moment, her brows furrowing slightly as she mulled over the question. "I don't know, Kim. I mean, I've been dating Reneé for six months now, but I'm just... scared, you know? What if Ayla doesn't like Reneé?"

Kimberly reached out and squeezed Y/n's hand reassuringly. "I get it, Y/n but she's your best friend, she loves you. And I'm sure she'll come around to the idea eventually."

Y/n smiled gratefully at Kimberly, feeling a wave of comfort wash over her. "Thanks, Kim. I needed to hear that."

Together, they stepped up to the counter to place their order. Y/n ordered her usual black coffee, while Kimberly opted for a caramel macchiato with extra whipped cream.

As they waited for their drinks, Kimberly leaned in conspiratorially. "You know, I think Ayla might have already guessed something's up. She's been asking a lot of questions lately, like why you're always busy on weekends and why you're suddenly so secretive about your plans."

Y/n's eyes widened in surprise. "She has? Oh no, what if she already knows and she's just waiting for me to tell her?"

Kimberly shrugged, a mischievous grin spreading across her face. "Well, there's only one way to find out. You just have to rip off the bandaid and tell her the truth."

Y/n nodded, determination shining in her eyes. "You're right, Kim. I'll tell her soon. And who knows, maybe she'll surprise us both and be totally cool with it."

Their drinks arrived, and they took a moment to savor the warmth of the coffee and the comfort of each other's company. As they made their way to their first class of the day, Y/n couldn't shake the nervous flutter in her stomach at the thought of finally coming out to Ayla.

Y/n and Kimberly made their way to their first class of the day, the anticipation of Y/n's impending conversation with Ayla hung in the air like a thick fog. But before Y/n could even gather the courage to speak, a familiar voice called out from behind them.

"Hey, wait up!" Ayla exclaimed, jogging towards them with a bright smile on her face. Her long brown hair bounced with each step, and her eyes sparkled with excitement.

Kimberly shot Y/n a quick glance, a knowing look in her eyes. "This is it, Y/n. Your chance to tell her."

Y/n took a deep breath, steeling herself for what was to come. "Hey, Ayla, there's actually something I've been meaning to tell you."

Ayla tilted her head, curiosity evident in her expression. "What is it, Y/n?"

Y/n hesitated for a moment before blurting out, "I'm dating Reneé Rapp."

Ayla's eyes widened in surprise, but before Y/n could even begin to worry about her reaction, Ayla's face broke out into a wide grin. "No way! That's amazing, Y/n! I'm so happy for you!"

Y/n's shoulders sagged with relief as she pulled Ayla into a tight hug. "Really? You're not mad or anything?"

Ayla shook her head, returning the hug with equal enthusiasm. "Of course not, silly. I actually kind of figured it out months ago. You've been so busy on the weekends and so secretive about your plans. I just wanted you to tell me on your own terms."

Y/n felt tears pricking at the corners of her eyes as she pulled away from the hug, a grateful smile spreading across her face. "Thank you, Ayla. I'm so lucky to have you as my best friend."

The three of them walked into class together, their laughter echoing through the hallway as they settled into their seats. Ayla turned to Y/n, a mischievous glint in her eyes. "So, what's it like to be with Reneé?"

Y/n couldn't help but blush as she thought about her girlfriend. "She's amazing, Ayla. She's sweet and loving and cute and... very hot."

Kimberly giggled from beside them, unable to resist making a joke. "Wow, Y/n, you look like you're practically floating on cloud nine."

Y/n laughed, playfully swatting at Kimberly's arm. "Oh, hush, Kim. You're just jealous because you haven't found your own Reneé yet."

Their banter was interrupted by the sound of the professor clearing his throat from the front of the classroom. "I hate to interrupt, ladies, but if my class isn't interesting enough for you to pay attention, perhaps you'd like to take your conversation elsewhere."

The girls exchanged sheepish looks before turning their attention back to the front of the room, stifling their laughter as they settled in for the lecture.

After their first and second classes, Y/n, Ayla, and Kimberly found themselves walking to the noodle restaurant on campus for lunch. The sun was high in the sky, casting a warm glow over the bustling courtyard as the trio made their way through the throngs of students.

As they approached the restaurant, Y/n couldn't shake the feeling of unease that settled in the pit of her stomach. "Ugh, I really hope she's not here," Y/n muttered under her breath, her brows furrowing with irritation.

Ayla glanced at her curiously. "Who are you talking about, Y/n?"

Y/n nodded towards a figure across the courtyard, her jaw tensing with frustration. "Her. Kate."

Kimberly and Ayla exchanged worried glances before turning their attention back to Y/n. They knew all too well the history between Y/n and Kate – a messy breakup that had left Y/n heartbroken and bitter.

Kimberly placed a comforting hand on Y/n's shoulder. "Just ignore her, Y/n. She's not worth your time or energy."

Taking a deep breath, Y/n nodded, trying to push aside the memories of their tumultuous relationship as they entered the restaurant. The scent of savory noodles filled the air, momentarily distracting Y/n from her thoughts as they approached the counter to place their orders.

As they settled into their seats, Y/n's heart sank as she caught sight of Kate making her way towards their table. "Great, just what I needed," Y/n muttered under her breath, her fists clenching with frustration.

Kate sauntered over with a smug grin on her face, her eyes locking onto Y/n with an intensity that made Y/n's skin crawl. "Well, well, well. Look who it is," Kate said, her voice dripping with sarcasm.

Y/n forced a tight smile, trying to maintain her composure. "Hi, Kate. What brings you here?"

Kate's grin widened, a cruel glint in her eyes. "Oh, you know, just thought I'd come say hi to my favorite ex-girlfriend."

Ayla and Kimberly exchanged incredulous looks, their jaws tightening with anger at Kate's audacity. Ayla spoke up, her voice sharp with annoyance. "Actually, Kate, we're in the middle of lunch. So if you don't mind..."

Kate's smile faltered for a moment before she regained her composure, a sneer crossing her features. "Fine, I'll leave you losers to your little lunch date. But just remember, Y/n, you'll never find anyone as good as me."

With that parting shot, Kate turned on her heel and stalked away, leaving Y/n seething with anger and frustration. Ayla and Kimberly exchanged sympathetic glances, offering Y/n words of comfort.

Y/n stabbed at her noodles with more force than necessary, her appetite all but gone as she stewed in her frustration. Ayla reached out a hand, laying it gently on Y/n's arm. "Hey, don't let her ruin your day, Y/n. She's not worth it."

Y/n sighed, pushing her plate away with a heavy heart. "I know, Ayla. It's just... seeing her brings back so many bad memories."

Kimberly nodded in agreement, her brows furrowed with sympathy. "She's toxic, Y/n. You're better off without her."

Y/n managed a weak smile, grateful for her friends' support. As she reached for her phone, hoping to distract herself from her thoughts, she felt a familiar buzz in her pocket. Pulling out her phone, she saw a text from Reneé.

💞Queen💞: Hey cutie, just taking a break in the studio. How's your day going?❤️

Y/n's heart skipped a beat at the sight of Reneé's  nickname, a small smile tugging at the corners of her lips. She quickly typed out a response, eager to shift her focus away from Kate and onto the woman who truly mattered.

Cutie🩵🧸: Not the best, ran into someone I'd rather not see. How is the studio? 🥰💋 

Before Y/n could even set her phone down, another message popped up from Reneé.

💞Queen💞: Aw, I'm sorry to hear that, Princess. Studio was good, but not as good as seeing your face. 😇😏❤️

Y/n couldn't help but giggle at Reneé's cheesy flirtation, feeling a warmth spread through her chest at the thought of her girlfriend. She quickly typed out a response, her fingers flying across the screen.

Cutie🩵🧸: Smooth, Rapp. 😉💋  

As Y/n's thumbs hovered over the screen, she hesitated for a moment before deciding to be honest with Reneé.

Cutie🩵🧸: Actually, I ran into Kate. It kind of ruined my mood.😑💋  

Y/n felt a pang of guilt as she hit send, not wanting to burden Reneé with her problems. But before she could even regret her decision, Reneé's reply came through.

💞Queen💞: Oh no, Cutie. Are you okay? Do you want me to come pick you up?❤️

Y/n's heart swelled with gratitude at Reneé's offer, feeling a rush of warmth wash over her. She quickly typed out a response, feeling a sense of relief knowing that she had someone like Reneé to lean on.

Cutie🩵🧸: No, it's okay. I'm with Ayla and Kimberly. But thank you for offering. Just having you to   talk to helps. 🥰💋

As Y/n sat with her friends, a small smile played on her lips as she continued to exchange texts with Reneé. However, her smile widened when she saw Reneé's latest message pop up on her screen.

💞Queen💞: Hey babe, does Kate know about us?❤️

Y/n's fingers flew across the screen as she quickly typed out a response, wanting to reassure Reneé.

Cutie🩵🧸: No, Kate doesn't know. And honestly, it's probably for the best.💋

Almost immediately, another message came through from Reneé, this time with a hint of possessiveness and protectiveness that made Y/n giggle despite herself.

💞Queen💞:If I ever see that Kate, I swear I'll crush her under my Louboutin heels.👠❤️

Y/n couldn't help but laugh at Reneé's dramatic declaration, typing out a playful response.

Cutie🩵🧸: Calm down, Regina George. Nobody's getting crushed.💋

Reneé's reply came through teasingly, her words laced with humor and affection.

💞Queen💞: Oh, come on, babe. You know I can go all Regina George on her. I played her in the movie, remember?💄❤️

Y/n couldn't suppress another giggle as she typed out her response, shaking her head at Reneé's antics.

Cutie🩵🧸: As tempting as that sounds, Kate isn't worth the Mean Girls reference.💋

But Reneé wasn't about to back down, her next message filled with determination and a hint of mischief.

💞Queen💞: If I could, I would do it. Nobody messes with my girl.😠❤️

Y/n's heart fluttered at Reneé's words, feeling a rush of warmth wash over her at the thought of Reneé's unwavering protectiveness. She quickly typed out her reply, a smile tugging at the corners of her lips.

Cutie🩵🧸:You have nothing to prove, Rapp. Besides, I'd rather have you serenading me than behind bars.💋

Reneé's response came through almost immediately, her words filled with love and devotion.

💞Queen💞: Trust me, babe, jail would be worth it if it meant keeping you safe and happy.❤️

Y/n couldn't help but feel a surge of affection for her girlfriend, knowing that no matter what, Reneé would always be there to protect her. 

As Y/n continued to exchange messages with Reneé, her smile widening with each playful interaction, she was oblivious to the amused glances shared between Kimberly and Ayla.

Kimberly nudged Ayla with a mischievous grin, nodding towards Y/n who was lost in her phone. "Looks like someone's got a secret admirer."

Ayla chuckled, leaning in closer to get a better look at Y/n's screen. "Or maybe it's just Reneé."

Y/n looked up from her phone, catching the teasing glint in Ayla's eye. "What's so funny, guys?"

Ayla smirked, unable to resist teasing her friend. "Oh, nothing. Just wondering who's got you smiling like that."

Y/n chuckled, shaking her head in amusement. "Just telling Reneé about running into Kate earlier. She wanted to go all Regina George on her."

Kimberly giggled, her eyes sparkling with mischief. "I bet that would be entertaining to watch."

Ayla nodded in agreement, a playful glint in her eye. "I saw the movie with Reneé as Regina. I'd love to see Kate get what she deserves."

Y/n rolled her eyes playfully, knowing her friends were only teasing. "Reneé won't actually crush anybody, you know. And you two need to behave."

The girls shared a laugh, their banter lightening the mood as they prepared to head to their next classes. As they walked, Ayla couldn't help but voice her thoughts on the situation.

"Kate's just a bitch," Ayla said bluntly, her voice tinged with disdain.

Kimberly nodded in agreement, her expression serious. "Yeah, she's always been trouble."

Curiosity piqued, Kimberly turned to Y/n with a questioning look. "Does Kate know about you and Reneé?"

Y/n shook her head firmly, her lips set in a determined line. "No, and she never will. It's none of her business."

Ayla smirked, a teasing glint in her eye. "Well, I gotta say, Y/n, you definitely upgraded from that rich bitch to a sweet and cute international singer."

Y/n couldn't help but blush at Ayla's comment, feeling a surge of gratitude for her friends' unwavering support. With a smile, she linked arms with Kimberly and Ayla as they made their way to their next classes, knowing that no matter what, she was surrounded by people who truly cared about her.

[kar1nsworldx]

Nerdy bloke ♡

pairing: ArthurTV x f!reader

Instagram!AU

SUMMARY: hard launching/soft launching(?) yours and Arthurs relationship - y/n used for reader as i thought it was stupid to just call her 'username' :)

requested: nope </3 but requests r opened for other youtubers (sidemen, chrismd, willne, calfreezy, etc.) as well for wolverine & deadpool PLEASE SEND REQUESTS

ˋ°•*⁀➷ 𝗠𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁 🧸ྀི

ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩ᯓᡣ𐭩

arthurtv

liked by y/n l/n, georgeclarkeey and 52,632 others

arthurtv: 🏂

tagged: @y/n l/n @arthurtv @georgeclarkeey @chrismd @wroetoshaw

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COMMENTS;

user007: arthur is the kind of guy to tag himself in his own post

y/n l/n: yeah it's bc hes a weirdo

y/n l/n: arthur i hate you, kys

arthurtv: :(

us3r: LMAOOOOOO

wroetoshaw: outrages

userly: love to see this group together <3

user777: THE SECOND PIC OF Y/N FALLING???????

usermybeloved: the third pic of Y/N is so cute wtf?????

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y/n l/n

liked by miniminter, chrismd10 and 42,632 others

y/n l/n: almost died 2day because of these fuckers 🤦‍♀️

tagged: @arthurtv @georgeclarkeey @chrismd @wroetoshaw

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COMMENTS;

georgeclarkeey: we were so close to killing her lads, im sure we'll succeed next time

y/n l/n: fucking hate you clarke

chrismd10: did you really have to post the fifth picture???

y/n l/n: yes ofc xx

arthurtv: that first picture is really pretty, I wonder who photographed it?

y/n l/n: ah yes, my apologies mr.television, heres your photo creds for one single fucking picture 🤲 xx

arthurtv: ty darling

userxo: DARLING????

userumy: UMMMM EXCUSE ME 👀👀👀

wroetoshaw: you did not almost die calm down

y/n l/n: WTF DO YOU MEAN I DIDNT ALMOST DIE???? YOU AND ARTHUR ALMOST DROPPED ME IN THE 3RD PICTURE MATE

usermybeloved: HAAHHAHAHAHAHAHHAA

arthurtv: sorry doll x

y/n l/n: buy me hot chocolate and i'll forgive you

arthurtv: yes ma'am

xeuserxe: DOLL??? MA'AM????? SIR WHAT

user111: LMAOOOO SHE HAS HIM WRAPPED AROUND HER FINGER SJFBNCNF

freyanightingale: looking stunning girly xxx

y/n l/n: FREYA MY WIFE ILY!!!!!!

freyanightingale: ❣️❣️❣️

xeuserxe: whos that w you on the fourth photo??

y/n l/n: 🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️🤷‍♀️

xeuserxe: hmm...

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savinggracepod

liked by userly, y/n l/n and 15,672 others

savinggracepod: Can you guees who's on tomorrow's pod? 👀😘

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y/n l/n: can't wait to see!!

savinggracepod: cheeky x

userly: MISS @y/n l/n COME HERE

xeuserxe: AHHH cant wait!! Xxx

user007: ❣️❣️❣️

user777: this is going to be good!

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y/n l/n

liked by savinggracepod, userly and 21,652 others

y/n l/n: was my pleasure to be on the @savinggracepod!!! loved talking about crushes 🤭, social media and so much more! GO CHECK OUT THE PODCAST RNN!!!! new yt video coming out in 2 days xx

tagged: @savinggracepod

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COMMENTS;

savinggracepod: was a pleasure to have you!! xx

y/n l/n: 💌💌💌

usermybeloved: cant wait for the new vid! :)

arthurtv: your new vid is bomb, can confirm

y/n l/n: :)

xouserxo: what editing program do you use?

y/n l/n: final cut pro x :)

xouserxo: tysm!!!

user007: i'm intrested in who this crush is...

y/n l/n: 🤭🤭🤭

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y/n l/n

liked by arthurtv, zerkaa and 68,752 others

y/n l/n: @sabrinacarpenter i love you please marry me 💍 also photo creds to mr. television @arthurtv for the 5th pic x

tagged: @sabrinacarpenter @arthurtv @arthurnfhill @chrismd10 @georgeclarkeey

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COMMENTS;

arthurtv: can we get married if sabrina says no 💍?

y/n l/n: ya ofc xx

arthurtv: yay x

userly: OH?????

user777: WHAT

usermybeloved: DO YQLL SEE THIS!?!??!?!????

chrismd10: @arthurtv I better be your best man

georgeclarkeey: your obbsession with her is concerning

y/n l/n: "please please please" shut the fuck upppppp!!!! Xxx

georgeclarkey: rude :/

user007: HAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHA

us3r: y/n is an icon

behzingagram: you ditched a sidemen shooting for a concert.. great

y/n l/n: okay so maybe I wasnt sick... whoops! 🤷‍♀️ xxx I'll be there next week ♡

behzingagram: you better be you bitch

y/n l/n: oh shut up you fat prick

usermybeloved: LOVE THEM SJFNNCNCC

user111: 💀💀💀

arthurtv: thank you for the photo creds doll

y/n l/n: yea yea ur welcome xx

arthurtv: :)

us3r: 'DOLL' ?????????????

ooouserooo: ARE YOU GUYS TOGETHER OR SOMETHING?????

useredup: "mr. television" just say yall r togetger atp

y/n l/n: nuh uh

useredup: FUCK YOU MEAN NUH UH?????

chrismd10: you were so wasted after this lol

y/n l/n: literally was not idk what ur talking about 🙄

chrismd10: arthur literally had to carry you bridal style because you were falling every 2 minutes

y/n l/n: I just wanted to be carried stfu

arthurtv: next time just ask doll, you dont have to almost brake your neck for me to carry you

y/n l/n: ay bet 💪🤭

user505: NAH WHAT

userly: THIS IS INSANE???????????!????????

user007: EXCUSE ME???? SHE WAS CARRIED BRIDAL STYLE BY ARTHUR???? "DOLL"????? "I WANTED TO BE CARRIED"????????? I AM GOING INSANE WHAT THE FUCK???? THE EMONJI COMBO TOO????? AAAAAAAH

taliamar: looking good x

y/n l/n: says you! xxx

faithlouisak: fit

y/n l/n: ❣️❣️❣️

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y/n l/n

liked by arthurtv, stephen_tries and 72,637 others

y/n l/n: date night was a blast w this nerdy bloke <3

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COMMENTS;

arthurtv: did you enjoy yourself doll?

y/n l/n: oh most certantly mr. television

userly: EXCUSE ME WHAT

useredup: WHAT IS HAPPENING

user007: ARTHUR X Y/N DATING CONFIRMED??????????!??????????

user111: LITERALLY GOING INSANE AND FERAL IF THIS ISNT FUCKING ARTHUR AND Y/N TOGETHER IN THOSE PHOTOS I AM GOING TO MURDER SOMEBODY AND THEN MYSELF TOO WHAT THE FUCKKKKKK

y/n l/n: please don't murder somebody! or yourself! and if youre going feral pls check that you dont have rabbies!! xxx much love (:

user111: NOW IM GOING CRAZY BECAUSE YOU REPLIED TO HOLY MOTHERFUCKING FUCK AAAAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

ksi: the flowers are pathetically cute

arthurtv: shut up

us3r: OH???????

usermybeloved: SCREAAAAMING

user505: ARTHUR THOSE FLOWERS BETTER BE FROM YOU

geenelly: cuties ♡♡♡

y/n l/n: says you! xx

bambinobecky: happines is a good luck on you girly! xxx

y/n l/n: stfu ur to kind 🫂🫂

chrismd10: about damn time

y/n l/n: oh shut up you inbred twat

taliamar: hope you guys enjoyed the resturant!

y/n l/n: YESSS we did!! double date soon? 👀🤭

taliamar: yess x

freyanightingale: the little bows are so cute 🎀

y/n l/n: RIGHT?????? ♡♡♡

user505: SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP DYING

georgeclarkeey: disgusting (said with love)

y/n l/n: literally die (said with love)

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y/n l/n & arthurtv

liked by vikkstagram, tobjizzle and 120,321 others

y/n l/n: IT IS FINALLY TIME!!!!!! NOT ONLY TO ANNOUNCE ARTHURS AND MINES RELATIONSHIP BUT TO ALSO SAY HAPPY BIRTHDAY ARTHUR!!!!!!! Arthur, Arthur, Arthur, where to start? Well first of all I'd like to wish you a happy 28th birthday my love! I geniuenly hope you enjoyed it, that you liked all of the gifts and that you enjoyed your birthday with the people you love and who love you too! There are not enough words in the english language to describe how wonderful you are, and how much I love you. You're the kindest, most smartest and funniest person I know, with the goofiest smile and silliyest ideas too. The way you care for others and how you always try to include people and help everyone around you makes my love you even more. Arthur you're the Deadpool to my Wolverine, the Sun to my Moon, the fucking love of my life. I love you to fucking death Arthur. Thank you for everything you've given me, and once more I wish you a very very happy birthday my love.

tagged: @arthurtv

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COMMENTS;

arthurtv: Y/n youre making me cry and the guys are laughing this is not funny :( also i love you too ❤

y/n l/n: ❣️❣️❣️❣️❣️

tobjizzle: happy birthday man! 🫂 so happy for you guys 😇

ksi: happy bday 💪💪💪also congrats too

vikkstagram: 🌟🫂

stephen_tries: hes crying a river y/n

freyanightingale: AHHHHH YOU GUYS ARE SO SWEET!!!

wroetoshaw: atp that mans drink will become pure water with how much tears are falling into it

behzingagram: sap

y/n l/n: shut the fuck up

taliamar: 🫂🫂🫂

miniminter: happy for you guys, and happy birthday arthur!

bambinobecky: SO HAPPY FOR YOU GUYS AAA!!!! Happy birthday!

faithlouisak: 🫂🫂

geenelly: HDHCJCJCJC SO HAPPY!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY ARTHUR

arthurnfhill: y/n my shirt is soaking wet make the man stop crying

callux: did not expect to see arthur cry 😭

calfreezy: best couple in 2024??? 👀👀

y/n l/n: YESSIR

theburntchip: y/n get that man some tissues pls

user111: MOM AND DAD ARE FINALLY TOGETHER AAAAAAAA

user505: SCREAMING CRYING THROWING UP DYING THIS IS REAL THIS IS ACTUALLY REAL

user777: HAPPY BIRTHDAY ARTHUR OHMYGOD

us3r: FIANALLY!!!!!!

useredup: YAYAYAYAYAYAYAY!!!!! HAPPY BDAY ARTHUR!!!!

usermybeloved: FUCK YEAAAAAH!!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY 🗣🗣🗣

xeuserxe: HELL YEAAAAAAHHHHHHH BABY

xouserxo: ❣️❣️🫂🫂

user007: HAPPY BIRTHDAY ARTHUR!!! 🎉🎉🎉

user707: FUCK YEWAAAH!!!! ALSO THE COMMENTS SAYING THAT ARTHUR IS CRYING????? HDNDJCJJC I LIVE YALL HAPPY BDAY ARTHUR!!!!!

us3r: JDNFJCJC LOVE ALL THE SHIRTLESS PICS 😭😭😭😭

userly: DIDOWJCJDHCHHC THE FIRST PIC IS SO FUNNY TO ME JDNDJCJ HAPPY BDAY AND CONGRATS!!!!

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y/n l/n added to their story!

⤷ arthurtv liked y/n l/n's story! ♡

⤷ arthurtv: love you 2 (:

.

[littlefireball]

Can we so get a version of Seongwha like F*ck away the pain? Seongwha is a clean freak so I'd love to see this side of him

Here you go~~ btw there is an exact same request lol

Other members (fk away the pain series): yeosang

ꜱʜ|ᴍᴀᴋᴇ ᴜᴘ ꜱ*x (ᴀ/ᴍ)

ʙᴜɴɴʏ ʜʏʙʀɪᴅ ꜱᴇᴏɴɢʜᴡᴀ x ꜰᴏx ʜʏʙʀɪᴅ ʀᴇᴀᴅᴇʀ

ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ: ꜱᴍᴜᴛ|ᴀɴɢꜱᴛ|ᴀʀɢᴜᴍᴇɴᴛ|ᴘʀᴏᴛᴇᴄᴛᴇᴅ ꜱᴇx|ɴᴇᴄᴋ ᴋɪꜱꜱ|ʙʀᴇᴀꜱᴛ ᴘʟᴀʏ|ꜱᴇx ᴅᴜʀɪɴɢ ᴘᴇʀɪᴏᴅ

ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 1.9ᴋ

You and Seonghwa have been apart for a week. It was unusual for you both to be separated for so long, as you were used to spending everyday together. There was no choice, however, a pressing matter awaited at the residence that demanded immediate attention.

You neglected to inform Seonghwa of your early return, opting instead to delight him with a surprise. Stealthily making your way into the house, you caught sight of him seated in his favorite chair.

"BA~BY~~" You leaped onto Seonghwa's back, unaware of the fact that he was holding a cup of noodles. "Goodness gracious!" Due to your unexpected jump, he inadvertently spilled noodles all over the legos.

"Oh my…" He straightened up abruptly, releasing your grip from his neck. "Have you returned?" His expression soon shifted from surprise to a hint of annoyance. "Well…yes. My apologies." Sigh "Let me clean up first" The tension in the air was palpable, especially since it was his beloved limited edition legos that was now in disarray.

His silence left you speechless, unsure of what to say next. Okay, look at what you've done. The entire desktop became a mess, not to mention his legos were all dirty─what he hated most as a clean freak.

"I'm sorry…" He glanced at you with impatience." "Can you be careful next time? You know it's hard to clean oil stains?! " His composed demeanor swiftly shifted to a slightly fierce one, his voice escalating in volume. His outburst, unlike anything you've witnessed before, sent a shiver down your spine. Coupled with your current irritable mood due to menstruation, his unexpected anger only fueled your own frustration.

"I didn't do it on purpose!" You shouted back. "But you are the one who made this mess!" Despite your strong urge to argue, you chose to maintain silence. Observing him meticulously restore his legos while muttering to himself, you swiftly retreated to your room to grant yourself solitude.

Feeling aggrieved, tears began to flow. Normally, you wouldn't cry easily, but the fact that you were on period slipped your mind. What followed such a display of emotion? The excruciating cramps that grip your stomach relentlessly. You gasped in agony as your body contorted in pain. Clutching your stomach, you struggled to sit up straight, let alone to take painkillers or call for help.

"Y/N?" Upon tidying up the desk, he pondered whether he had been too harsh with you, prompting him to seek you out but you had no response. 'Was she still angry?' "Y/N?I come in now." To his surprise, he found you huddled in a cocoon of pillows and blankets, your complexion pallid and your expression distressed.

"Y/N?Are you okay?Are you in heat? But there is no scent…" Alarmed, he hurried to your side to assess your condition, only to discover that you were in pain. You looked pale, drawn, and sweaty, as if something was torturing you.

"It's just on my period…" "Is it painful?But you won't be hurt before. Do you want some water?Or painkillers? Or something?" He gently caressed your head, his eyes filled with concern. You shook your head, taking his hand and placing it beneath your cheek. "I'm…fine…" Your furrowed brow betrayed your true feelings. As a fox hybrid, you knew that intimacy could alleviate menstrual pain, but you couldn't bring yourself to ask him. How could a rabbit, so obsessed with cleanliness, agree to such a request?

"Sorry, hwa.I didn't mean to. I know I am sweaty now and I'll wash the sheet." You pouted, your fox ears dropped.

"Why are you saying sorry? It's fine, baby. Let's not talk about this, okay? What can I do for you to reduce the pain, hm?" He comforted you softly while caressing your fluffy fox ears.

"Please don't be mad…" You hugged the pillow filled with his scent tightly, said "I want you…fuck me…" "Yo─you said what??" "Intimacy could reduce menstrual pain in foxes…" You hesitated, avoiding his eyes as you nestled into the soft pillow. A heavy silence lingered, intensifying your discomfort. It was no surprise that he reacted this way. He probably viewed you as unclean and not willing to help you.

"Forget what I said…I'll take the painkillers…seonghwa?" Strangely, you found him not in the room. Your attention was drawn to a faint noise, the gentle clinking of objects brushing against each other. As the door creaked open, Seonghwa stood before you, clutching a dry towel, a wet towel, a box of tissues and a plastic bag.

After placing down the objects on the table, he climbed over the bed, gently leaving your thighs and putting the dry towel under your body. "Hwa?" "It's okay, honey, I'm here to help you." As you watched him lift up your dress and pull down your panties, you held his hand to stop him.

"It's dirty…You don't have to do this, I can take the pill." He pecked at the back of your hand, whispering gently. "Taking too many pills is not good for your body and let me make it up to you. I'm sorry I was too tough." "I'm sorry, too."

Seonghwa caressed your head and placed a kiss on your cheek, giving you a sweet smile. "Let me help you then." With utmost care, he placed your foot on the ground, positioning you on the bed in a L shape. He removed your panties and set them aside, ensuring not a drop of blood tainted the fabric. However, upon witnessing the sight of your bloody hole, he hesitated momentarily. "It's fine, hwa. I can drink some hot water to reduce the pain…" "Everything is okay, honey." He wrapped up the condom before aiming at your entrance, slowly entering without hurting you.

Your tail puffed up as his cock fitted you perfectly, causing you to bite your lips not to make a sound. "Let me adjust first, honey." Wrapping by blood was weird, he could tell. It was hot and sticky, but indeed was a good lubricant. He found he can slide into your deepest part thanks to your blood. Maybe he could feel better just by thinking that it was not your blood but cum.

Slowly, he adjusted the feeling and thrusted into you. You were so sensitive that you moaned at the slightest touch to your sweet spot. "Fuck, honey, you are sensitive." He propped himself with both of his arms on either side of you, drew his hips and slid into your deepest area until he could not go further. "Ah~hwa~" The bed creaked as Seonghwa rolled his hip at a fast pace, you grasped the bedside and moaned choppy.

"I can't baby, it feels good." His hand trailed to your tail, caressing from bottom to top. He knew you loved it, badly. "Oh─oh!Gosh, hwa~ah!" Your wall tightened around his long cock as the numbness almost overwhelmed you and the period pain was gradually replaced. The musk scent belonging to you filled in the air combined with his sweet strawberry scent, fueling the desire within your bodies.

Seonghwa laid beside you and made sure the towel was still in the right place. "I love your scent so much." He couldn't help but bury himself into your crook of neck without breaking the thrust. Both of your left leg and tail were pushed forward to allow him to enter deeper. His hand trailed down to the hem of your dress, climbing up to your breast, kneading and squeezing it.

The electrifying sensation cascaded through your being, causing you to gasp in delight. You adored the way his form molded against yours, his imposing presence making you feel petite, while his intoxicating aroma surrounded you like a warm embrace, promising endless waves of ecstasy. You could cum multiple times because of this feeling.

But that's not enough. He licked the back of your ear, the sound of his tongue against your skin stimulating your nerves, making you tremble; his lips gradually moved downwards, planting shallow kisses on your nape, sucking on your fine skin, leaving faint red marks.

"Honey, are you okay right now?" His soft voice made you awake temporarily. "Yah, yah." He stopped thrusting and cupped your face, made you look at him. "Can I go rough?You can say no if you don't want to." "I can, please." Upon hearing your answer, he flipped you over to make your chest pressed against the sheet.

"Tell me if I'm too rough." You nodded, sensing the bed dip under his weight. He smoothly slid you once more, pressing against your back, his cock buried deeply in this particular angle. Contrary to the tenderness before, he pounded in and out with primal intensity. "Shit!!Fuck!Hwa!" Your derriere quivered with each rapid thrust, the delicate caress proving irresistible. He groaned uninhibitedly, reveling in the sheer pleasure of it all.

Seonghwa grabbed your hair and pulled it back a little bit, allowing him to leave a bite mark on your neck. "It's beautiful." Pressing a kiss on it, he sat up straight and continued to enter in and out as fast as possible. You were on the verge of losing your breath due to the pain and stimulation coming from below, and could only express your excitement through desperate screams.

His hand once again found your long tail, kneading it as if it was a ball. "Hwa…hwa…" "What if I pull it, a bit?" He pulled your tail slightly, pain blended with pleasure and numb, this sensation sent you to the edge of climax. "Hwa, I'm…oh fuck, ple…"Your cries of pleasure were now intertwined with the sound of weeping. You were rendered speechless, unable to form coherent words, only producing incomprehensible sounds.

"Tell me, what'd you want?" "Cum…Fuckkk!!" He collided with your sweet spot without any error. "Cum baby, let me feel you." Closing your eyes tightly, you could feel a knot in your stomach. His thrusting became sloppy and lost his rhythm, he was almost at his limit. With a few more thrusts, both of you reached your peak.

"Thank you, hwa." "Don't say this, honey. You're amazing." Catching his breath, he slowly withdrew from your body to ensure you can feel every vein of his manhood. "Clean up first, little fox. Stay still." He carefully took off the condom without dirty his hand, threw it in the plastic bag and cleaned you up with tissue and wet towel.

"Let's go take a bath first and I'll change the sheet, hm?" He pecked at your forehead as you nodded. After you showered, he already changed the sheets and all the pillow bags. Of course, all the rubbish was thrown away, and even the towels were put in the washing machine.

"Cuddle?" He guided you to the bed as you nod, cradling you tenderly in his arms. "Is it hurt now?" You shook your head, feeling comfort in his warm embrace. "It's much better now, thanks babe." He tenderly kissed your forehead, his eyes filled with affection. "Let's sleep, hm?" You snuggled closer to him, and together you drifted into a peaceful sleep.

And the legos? Well, although he said it's fine, you still buy ten more packages for him as a make up. One can never have too much of a good thing, right?

[moonystoes]

Tiktok Trend - Elisa De Almeida

Summary: you and Elisa decide to hard launch by doing a tiktok trend.

A/n: heyyy!! This was actually my first ever fic (January 5th) and I completely forgot about it until I decided to clean up my notes app and couldn't even recognize it. It's quite short ( and a mess) but sweet. Enjoy!!!

"Okay let's do this tiktok trend you showed me!" Elisa jumped up from the beige couch excitedly. It was you who showed her the tiktok trend where couples tell the camera what they like and hate about each other, but it wasn't your intention to film one. She was skeptical about posting a lot of photos of you on her account, worried if her fans would bother you. And although it annoyed you at first that she's hiding you, it made you warm that she's doing all of this for your comfort.

But fanpages had already found your accounts on tiktok and instagram, stalking your posts and going through your stories every time you post. At first it made you uncomfortable, but you had accepted it for the sake of elisa. Some of them are nice, ones that you look through their edits and content and smile. But of course there were some that sent you weird messages about leaving their 'wife'.

"Are you sure it's a good idea? I haven't posted tiktoks about you yet."

"I mean... do you not want to? It's your account. And besides, you have already posted photos of me on Instagram so they're aware of us." Her sudden energy slightly deflated when she heard your hesitant tone.

"Yes! I don't mind it at all. Ehm... okay sit next to me and I'll prop my phone here." You pointed next to you on the couch, grabbing your phone and angling it on the coffee table perfectly to show the both of you.

You took a deep breath as you opened tiktok. You knew there was no going back once you do this, they will either love you or completely harass you.

"Hey I'm here with elisa and we have to say one thing we hate about each other." You touched your hair, making sure it's not a mess. Elisa can sense you being worried, she softly intertwined her hand with your other one.

"Why hate? Why not love?" She fake frowned, "wow is there no love in your heart?" She looked at the camera with a raised eyebrow in fake-shock.

"Oh my god!" You rolled your eyes, "we will start with hate and then love. So if you get pissed at what I hate about you, you'd feel better about the love." You played with her thin cross bracelet, your eyes zoning out at the sight of her veiny hand. She looked back at you with a sarcastic angry face and a soft hum.

"Okay who will start?" She asked. Her gaze softening when she realized that you're not listening. She squeezed your hand, making you look up towards her face with a slight flushed face.

It was obvious that her hands and arms were distracting to you, she had noticed your fascination to them since your first date. At first she thought there was something like a sauce or maybe a bug on her hand when your eyes kept going down there, but there wasn't a thing there and it didn't take her long to understand.

"I'll start," she whispered, "I don't like it when you...always put others first, sometimes you need to be selfish and think about yourself." She whispered, her other hand playing with the button of your shirt.

You looked away to stop the blushing, realizing that if you looked at her eyes you'd probably stammer and never end up saying what you want. The amount PDA she's doing is stressing you a little, worried what the media would think. "What I don't like about you is... the tech fleece." You laughed at the way her face dropped.

"Are you serious? Mine was so romantic and yours is just so mean!" She let go of your hand, turning to the camera and folding her arms over her chest. "Wow you guys are witnessing a break up right now. The best thing about you is...the break up right now."

"Okay whatever, the best part about you is-"

"My hands!"

"Huh?" You looked at her face in confusion. She burst out laughing, her head tilting back and her hands clutching her side.

When realization hit, your face had a small shameful frown. You really thought you were slick admiring them, but she obviously knows you a little too much.

"Whatever, my favorite part about you is your smile." Elisa brushed off your reaction as she responded. She placed her arm around your shoulder and pulling you into her side, a soft smile blossomed in your face at the mention.

You hoped your blush was not obvious when you looked back at the small screen. You reached for the phone and ended the video, making a quick caption: "She got mad but it's the truth and you guys know it too."

You threw the phone to Elisa, obviously too scared to press 'post'. She held into your hand tightly and did it for you, before turning to look at you and shrugging, "done."

Since your job was at the evening, it wasn't hard to avoid your phone all day. It was until 10pm when the both of you cuddled in bed. Elisa's face was resting on the nape of your neck, she tapped your arm quickly as she huffed in frustration.

You stopped scrolling on Twitter to glare at her, "what?"

"Tiktok time before we sleep," she lifted her head to give you a pout, making you giggle and roll your eyes. It has been a routine for you to go on tiktok and her just staring at your screen before sleeping. The first time it happened was when you had your first night at her apartment, and you can vividly recall her face trying to pretend that she wasnt looking at your screen until you called her out for it.

"Fine," you laughed and went on tiktok, but the '99+' notifications reminded you of the video you made. Elisa noticed your uneasy look, before pressing the little envelope to see them.

The video already had around 50k likes, which was surprising since your usual ones get around 3000 only. You scrolled through the comments, many of them were in Portuguese since she's mostly popular in Brazil.

"You know... I don't feel so bad now that I don't speak Portuguese, because I don't wanna know what all of this is about."

Elisa sat up and grabbed your phone from your hands, she leaned in closer to your screen since she wasn't wearing her glasses, "umm...some of them are crying about me not being single, and...about us being touchy."

You remained quiet for a second, "so none of them are rude to me, yeah?" You glanced at her face as she turned to look at you, "don't lie, I wanna know what they think about me."

Elisa leaned in close and hugged you, she can hear the insecurity in your voice, "none of them are mean to you, I promise. They're just hurt that this sexy, hot, talented, beautiful woman has a girlfriend. But that's it."

You sarcastically pushed her away, "you don't even describe me that way."

She laughed and continued scrolling. By now, the comments became more international. Arabic, Spanish, French, English and more. You can understand some of them, which made your body relax when you realized Elisa was somewhat right.

"Omg what 💀💀"

"Noooooooo she's not single wtf"

"Please why is Elisa so touchy (im gonna cry I wish that was me)"

"Guys be nice to the poor girl, she looks so stressed posting this. We need to let her know that she's loved and appreciated by us 💞💞 (we need more content of elisa tho, plz y/n 🙏)"

"Please why are they cute"

"OMG WAG?? WE NEED SERIOUS WAG SERIES Y/N IF YOU'RE WATCHING THIS PLEASE"

"I think I just heard my heart get crushed. As long as she's happy"

"Why is Elisa with someone like that? She deserves way better 🤮"

Your eyes quickly looked away from the phone. Of course you'll get hate. There is no way you can please the millions that are thirsting for her.

Since Elisa's English isn't the best, it took her way longer to read that comment than you. She glanced at you as you were adjusting your pillow, preparing yourself to sleep.

She sighed and turned off your phone, reaching out to put it delicately on your nightstand, "baby...you know that they're just jealous of you, right?"

She placed her hand on you side and pulled you closer. She hated how you weren't facing her, it made it harder for her to see your features and emotions.

"You're the most beautiful and pure woman I've ever seen, I love everything about you and they clearly don't know anything for them to say a thing," she can feel your tense body slowly relax, "the truth is...dating someone that's famous, there are so many childish teens being obsessed and have no respect for others. It doesn't matter what that person says, because I'm happy with you and I hope I make you feel the things you make me feel."

You slowly turned around to face her, a soft grateful smile in your sleepy face, "I love you, and I'm so happy I bumped into you that day...I don't care what they say, I just hope I don't disappoint them."

"You'll never disappoint me, and they got to see only a minute of us...while I get 24 hours of you."

It softened your heart talking to her about all of this, feeling a little lighter after having this conversation. Within the 6 months of you dating, you were too scared to bring this topic up. And Elisa knew about it but waited for the moment you were comfortable enough to speak.

You leaned in closer to her as you placed your palm on her cheek, pulling her in to give her a peck. Elisa pulled you in closer to deepen the kiss, "I love you so much, y/n. I would make a whole tiktok account to bully the bullies if I had to."

You cackled at the comment, resting your head on her chest, "I love you too...but please don't do that,"

"Hmm...I just want to protect my princess," she joked.

"Goodnight, Eli."

"Goodnight."

___

~ Pleaseee hit my inbox if you have ideas because this was the last one in my brain

~ sorry if this isn't the best, I genuinely didn't know how to make it right

[samandcolbyownme]

Summary: anon request - "can you do a zach one where he like exposes him and readers secret relationship and she just goes with it , like " you weren't so quiet last night " and she just has her jaw dropped and says something back and it ends with smut" 

Warnings: this one shot will contain reader having sexual daydreams during the podcast, those dreams will include, oral (m rec), unprotected sex, the rest will contain Zach's usual banter and fluffiness

Word count: 2.1 k | not edited 

Also - I know it might get confusing, but the italics are what happened the night before, but in the form as if it's happening right now, like you're replaying the night in your mind. Hope that made sense, enjoy! 

╔═══━━━─── • ───━━━═══╗

"You want to know what I think is crazy?" Zach asks as his fingers drag up and down your arm. 

"Hmm?" You hum quietly as you keep your head on his chest. You feel him laugh slightly, "That no one has figured us out yet." 

You laugh, moving your head to look up at him, "Well now you just jinxed the hell out of that." 

He shrugs, a smirk on his face, "I mean I like us being a secret and all, but it's so hard for me to not say certain things when you're on the pod with us." 

You nod, "Yeah, I know what you mean." You smirk, "So what, is that your way of telling me you're going to out us at tomorrow's show?" 

He raises his brows, "I'm full of surprises babe. Guess you're going to have to wait and see." 

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

The next day, you're sitting on the red bench, headphones on and you're getting ready to do the show, but your mind just isn't there. 

Instead it's elsewhere. 

Specifically, replaying the time spent with Zach the previous night. 

The way you felt coming back from the restaurant, you needed him, his hands resting on your hips as you unlock your door made you crave him. 

When you finally got the door open, it was like the energy that craved one another clashed, As soon as you push the door open, he spun you around, lips on yours as he backs you into your apartment. 

"Hey." A hand is woven in front of you, "Earth to y/n." 

You look over at Tara and blink as you take your headphones off, "Yeah, hi. I'm here." 

"Where the fuck did you go. You were like-" she mimics how you were staring, "Zoned out." 

You laugh, "Sorry. I'm tired. I was up all night." Zach and Jared walk onto the set, "Oooh. Up all night doing what?" Zach teases and you roll your eyes, "I was coming up with a list of places that've already been to for Sam and Colby." 

Zach sits down and raises his brows, "Wow that was very specific." Zach sighs, placing his headphones on and you can't help but laugh. 

Friends around friends, lovers when it's just you two. 

You lean back, placing your headphones back on and Tara speaks up, "So I have to ask, how does it feel being better than two of the most liked ghost hunters in the world?" 

You laugh slightly, "What do you mean?" 

"I know you do paranormal investigation stuff too, and just the fact that Sam and Colby are coming to you for stuff.. I don't know that just.." Tara laughs and you tilt your head, "Are you just saying that to make a jab at them?" 

She nods and lean in to your mic, "Well then it feels pretty damn good." 

"Alright, alright. Anymore and we'll be scraping your brain off the walls from your head swelling to the point of exploding." Zach tries not to laugh and you shrug, "Hey, I take it when I can." 

You give him a quick and subtle wink then quickly change the subject, "Cat got Zach's tongue so I'll just go ahead and do the intro for him." You laugh, "What's up guys, we're here with Tara, Alyssa, me, Jared and oh, I guess Zach is here too." 

Zach just stares at you and you can't help but laugh. 

"Okay, but I love the fact that she announced Tara and me first." Alyssa laughs and you point to her. Tara nods, "Yeah, I'm going to have to say that we need to all vote to make y/n the person who announces the show." 

"Like a pre-recorded track because there are days she isn't here." Alyssa points out and you nod, "I agree. All in favor." You raise your hand and instantly say, "Three versus two. Girls win." 

"Youre ridiculous. Who invited you here anyway?" Zach rolls his eyes and you furrow your brows, "Um, you?" 

"Can you just like, zip it." Zach motions at his mouth and you smirk, "Make me. Take my headphones away." 

Zach tries not to laugh, "I mean, I can. But you might moan a little." 

"Oh my god. No. No. No." you close your eyes and look away from him, but in secret, you'd be on your knees in seconds for him. 

Zach places his hands on your shoulders, urging you to your knees. You drop down, complying to his every silent request. 

You stare up at him as he shrugs his black jean jacket off, eyes locked on yours as his jaw is slightly slack from your hand sliding over his throbbing cock that's being held back by his jeans. 

"I don't think.. you should say that to our guests?" Jared says with a nervous laugh, "I'm actually surprised you haven't gotten sued yet." 

"Please." Zach shrugs, nodding to you, "She won't sue me." 

Tara points to you, "I think you should just for his reaction. 

You laugh, "Thinking about it." 

You weren't thinking about that at all, Zach undoes his belt, followed by his jeans. The quick sound of the zipper going down causes your skin to perk up with goosebumps, caused by excitement. 

You rise up from your calves, licking your lips as you work fast to free him from his boxers. 

Zach speaking pulls you back into reality, "So now that we're past that embarrassing ensemble.." 

Zach trails off and so does your mind, You loved hearing Zach's little moans and groans as you held his cock with your lips and tongue. 

The way his fingers gentle drug over your head, slowly pulling your hair as his pleasure grew larger, "Fuck." 

Zach didn't really swear in general, so when he did, and it was because of you. It was even fucking hotter. 

You blink, snapping back into reality. 

"So I thought we could talk about something serious today." Zach says and Jared laughs, "Oh no. Someone's getting fired." 

"Yeah it's you." Zach says, pretending to be serious and Jared laughs, "I'd love to see you try, I'll just tell you no and you'll listen." 

You laugh and nod, "No that's so true." 

"Yeah whatever." Zach rolls his eyes, "No I have an exciting announcement." 

Your heart thumps and your head snaps towards him slightly. 

His eyes move to you and he smiles a little bit, "So, I have some news that may shock a lot of people, but I think everyone should know this, from me." 

"What's the fuck is happening?" Tara asks and Zach sighs, speaking quickly, "We're going to be doing a live dropouts show." 

You let out a breath and keep your stare on him, "Wow, Zach. That's great." 

"Better be, because they want all of us who are here right now." Zach gives a thumbs up, "What a relief it was to get that off my chest." 

You laugh slightly as your eyes trail down his neck to his necklace that's lying comfortably on his chest. 

Your back slams onto the bed, Zach's lips kissing over any skin they can reach. You let out a moan as he sucks a hicky into the skin over your hip. 

He kisses up over your boobs and up your neck. He leans up and you feel his cock slip between the folds of your pussy. 

The shiny necklace dangling from his neck as you feel him slide into you fully. You find it so hot when it swings back and forth with each thrust.

"Hey, I can't lie." Jared laughs and Tara cuts him off with a yell, "Say it!" 

You look over, at Tara, laughing as she keeps pointing to jared. You look over at Zach and he gives you a look that would make your legs go weak if you were standing. 

It wasn't a weird look. It was him just staring at you, knowing why you keep zoning out, and he was just making it worse. 

"I liked y/n's intro." Jared sighs and you look over at Jared with a clap, "Thank you." 

"You definitely thought it was better than Zach's intro, right?" Alyssa asks and Jared laughs, "I'm not answering that." 

You yelling with excitement, "Fuck yeah! Because you know that girls are just better than boys!" You motion between you, Tara and Alyssa. 

"Whoa, whoa!" Zach says waving his hand out in front of him a few times, "Settle down. Settle down, I'm getting flashbacks." 

"War flashbacks." Jared snorts and Tara asks with a laugh, "Flashbacks of what?!" 

You look at Zach, laughing and he shakes his head while furrowing his brows, "I don't know what you're laughing about because these flashbacks are of how loud you were being last night." 

It all happened so fast you blank, "What the fuck." 

"What did he just say?" Jared asks, mouth dropped with surprise. 

"Oh yeah, okay." Tara rolls her eyes and as you're still staring at Zach, he tilts his head slightly, giving his brows a quick flick. 

He outted you at tomorrow's show. 

Might as well roll with it. 

"You gonna tell them or you want me to, princess?" Zach smirks and you shrug, letting out a dramatic sigh, "Whatever helps you sleep at night." 

"Oh, you know exactly what helps me sleep at night." Zach winks as you look at him and you shake your head, looking down to rest it in your hand. 

"I can't tell if they're joking." Alyssa laughs and Tara cuts in, "Yeahhh, I mean, okay. I've actually been extremely suspicions about these two for weeks now."

"Oh please tell us what made you think that, Tara." Jared leans in, super invested into the conversation. 

You look up and look from Tara to Zach and he shrugs, "Hit me." He nods to Tara and she smirks, looking between you and Zach, "Well for starters, he stares at her every time she looks away." 

"I like looking at the back of her head. It makes it so I don't have anything mean to say." Zach shrugs and you  just laugh. 

"What else you got, Tara?" Jared encourages and Tara laughs, "Another thing is, they'll stop answering me at both at the same time. Like I'll be texting both of them and then all of a sudden.. radio silence." 

"I have a very strict bed time, Tara." You and Zach both say, just adding fuel to the fire and you just laugh, knowing that you're caught. 

"See!" Tara tells pointing, "See!" 

"Well.. if you don't know you do now." Zach laughs and Jared eggs him on, "Know what? Zach. Care to enlighten us with a perfect confirmation?" 

"What's my lawyer?" Zach yells looking around as he raises his hand. 

"So isn't true? You and.." Alyssa points from you to Zach and you laugh, nodding your head slowly. 

"Wow." Jared says, "I honestly did not expect this is come out onto the podcast today." 

Zach reaches for his water and takes a sip, "Listen, we played dumb, but we knew what we were doing." Zach scoffs, "Alright. You can't tell me that you weren't fooled."

"I knew my suspicions were there for a reason." Tara laughs, "How long?" 

"Two months." You laugh and they don't believe you.  Zach nods, "No she's serious.  It was after the episode with Jake and Johnnie." 

"Oh shit, yeah I guess that was two months ago." Tara nods, "I'm just like.. having a holy fuck moment." 

"Yeah." Zach laughs, "She came to see if I was as rich as I bragged that I was, and I must have passed inspection because she didn't go home that night." 

"Oh my god." You laugh, "That's not.." you shake your head and Jared laughs, "I just.. that really does shock me, like.. y/n. Why him?" 

You shrug, smiling as you look over at Zach. He glances at you and smirks, "What can I say? I'm full of surprises."

.·:*¨ ✘ ¨*:·.

Thank you for reading! Let me know how you liked it. Love you all! Thank you so much for reading! 

Likes and reblogs are majorly appreciated!

[bon2bonn]

Weathering your Storm

° The winds are howling

With summer break around the corner , it's just one weekend . What could go wrong ?, Well........ , Seb , Lewis and Daniel are about to find out.

*The start of the 22!23! Grid!AU !

*requests and questions are open so don't be shy ! ✨

2022!F1 grid X female!driver!reader

Sebastian vettel , Daniel Ricciardo, Lewis Hamilton X female!driver!reader.

Words count : around 1.4k

Warnings : grammar, cursing,sad girl hours, mercedes slander(not really), McLaren, I'm missing up the timeline but it's fun , not proof read nor edited .

leaving the media pen brought y/n relief as she's finally able to stretch her legs and get some fresh air away from the bustling reporters asking the same questions over and over again and buzzing teams finishing interviews and packaging garages after the race .

She avoided her team's garage like a plague , having to witness as the engineers pushed her car back in was more than too much for her to handle , so she opted for walking around trying to clear her mind before it goes on to a spiral.

Spotting Sebastian's green team shirt alongside Lewis and chatting among themselves down the pit wall she made a beeline for them . "Hello gentlemen . seb, Lewie " she greats them cheerfully as she gave each one a hug as they congratulate her before settling back beside Seb as he nudged her shoulder teasing " p3 , not so bad huh? " causing her to smile bashfully at him , Lewis pumped his fist with her's " great driving out there " , "thank you " she said with a beaming smile " yeah those last 3 lap were from hell , Sainz almost got my ass " both looked amused at her ranting post race as she always dragged them to listen , not like they were complaining as they adored how she went on giving them her full review with them giving her input here and there .

after a while of catching up they noticed how uncharacteristically quite she got while looking around searching for something or rather someone but before they could ask she perked up as Danny barged over lifting her in a tight hug shaking her around while exclaiming loudly "demon spawn!" And she returned the hug letting out a loud "Ricky Martin!" The other just stood there used to their antics same as everyone around them as they love to tease (bully) eachother around the paddock .

She turned to Danny giving him a wide grin" you're right on time , I was about to send out searching party " he nudged her shoulder " awww , I didn't know you'd miss my charming personality and handsome face that much " she scoffed at him " as if " he stepped back hand on his heart dramatically whining " you've wounded my delicate heart !" That got him a kick in the shin from her before she grinned back at him " stop with you theatrics , I have a great idea , we should start our own F1 support group !" mildly amused he threw her a wide grin " I'm all in baby , but what for?" So she looked at the other two drivers maintaining her wide grin as she lowered her voice to avoid any preying ears "well , mainly for you , Mick and Seb , but I'll be needing it too . my lovely team pulled a McLaren because guess who's mercedes dropping during the summer break ? , to give you a hint it's not Lewis" .

The three of them stood still staring at her as if she'd grown a second head , Danny was the first to snap out laughing "nice one mate ! That Almost got me" after a moment of silence Sebastian signals to him and he immediately reached to cover her ears as he cursed loudly "that's fucking bullshit , why the fuck would they ?" As she just stood there waiting for him to finish , Lewis just stared at her bewildered " what do you mean they are dropping you ? They can't do that , you're competing for the championship in that tin can excuse of a car incase they've forgotten about the standings ! Hell ! We both got a contract till 24 _ 25 they can't just drop it".

she just shrugged " well , they sure can and already did so ....." Danny's eyes couldn't get wider "what?!" So she gave them a nonchalant hand wave "starting from tonight I'm officially an unemployed F1 driver , they bought my contract and sent me out the door" Lewis interrupted " but Toto...." Only for her to shake her head " he sat me down along with the team management , PR and legal team which explains why they were lurking around lately , and both my lawyer and Manager out of nowhere and went on about the team and the drivers , how the last two years were great for the team bonding building a solid foundation and all of the usual pe-race briefing no big deal right ? , He went on talking about my contract which was odd because I knew wouldn't be up till 24 at least with great possiblity of extension , and how I have a promising future in the sport but not with them and I honestly just zoned out after that ,up until they gave me an offer out of of guilt or pity I guess to drive for Williams alongside Albon " that got Danny's attention "what about Russell?" So she whispered to him to subtly hold both Lewis and seb back as they both were close to marching over mercedes demanding answers after her declaring " they finalized singing him today for the next three seasons so starting from SPA he'll be driving full time for mercedes , that's net even the worst part , apparently they were discussing the position since the beginning of the previous season but they wanted me out with the least PR damages so now is the best chance to do so after most teams got their seats confirmed for next season so here I am " .

"Wait so you're telling me that everyone knew except us ? " she shrugged "pretty much, yeah " , "bono?" , " He knew" , " sussie?" , "Nodding "yup" , "James?" , "Uhuh , he was all in for the change" , "fucking hell!", "Exactly" she shrugged " they even decided they won't even announce any of it till Spa " . Daniel whistled in astonishment " wait until Nando hear about this " causing them to grimace only thinking what he'd possibly do " oh he already know ! Found him this morning cornering Toto in the garage , don't know what he said but by the time I got him he was done , talking about too many witnesses " , that got seb to realize as he voiced out concerned " that's why he seemed so cryptic , well more than usual, he asked me to get ready to head out to Brackley headquarters for some urgent business had to talk him out of it " she snorted" Don't be so sure , He asked me to join too right before quali so I reckon that talk didn't do much , Kimi is in it too so .... Yeah ".

Silence overtook them as their somber faces took her demeanor in , her now fidgeting fingers , tense shoulders , and strained smile , seb stepped up giving her a tight hug whispering " are you okay?" And she reciprocated with a strained voice " yeah , it's just didn't hit me yet so I would give it two to three days to fully set in but right now, everything is shitty and I want to cry but I'm too angry to cry so now I'm hungry , I want ice cream ". That earned her a sympathetic smile from Lewis as he pulled her next " I known darling , let's grab our things and I promise you we'll get you as much of ice cream as you want okay? ", " Okay , but I'm not going there , I can't , they're taking down my name and number off of everything" she let out with a small voice as he sighed heavily "already!? They couldn't wait?" Shaking his head while heading up to their drivers rooms .

Danny put his arm around her shoulders swaying them as he reminded " it might be so shitty and as bad as it seems , but we've got you okay? You'll find us there whenever you need us , you're stuck with us for good , and if you wanna burn down you know what , you know where ........." Seb snapped. " no one is burning anything!" Only for him to carry on pretending to whisper " we won't tell him " causing her to let a loud giggles at how serious Daniel was and how seb was trying to tell him off of it ." Just know you won't be alone in this".

[withleeknow]

for the requests — i'll send two songs that i've liked for quite a while and you can choose the member that you see who fits the vibe?

sand by dove cameron

and

make you mine by madison beer

conversations with strangers.

pairing: seungmin x gn!reader genre/warnings: exes to ??, non-idol au (i wrote this with seungmin in mind as a celebrity/singer or musician of some sort so it's pretty vague and it's not explicitly mentioned what he actually does, so if you wanna imagine him as an idol it still fits the narrative. i can't tell you what to do lol), Angst™️! (i think. i liked this at first but then i was looking at it so much that i became desensitized to it and idk if it's that sad anymore lol); the ending is a little ambiguous maybe?, mentions of drinking, mentions of sex, could've been more edited word count: 2.9k note: this might be one of my favorite things that i've written lately but i am also in my fish freshly dropped on land era so i am fully prepared for this to flop like ass lol bye

as always, i’d appreciate any thoughts or comments you may have, and please drop a like and/or reblog if you enjoy reading ♡

navigation / request masterlist / ko-fi

I saw the end when we began You couldn't love the way I can I tried to bargain with the stars For more than half of your heart But you have more pieces of me than the desert has sand And I have less pieces of you than I can hold in my hand

Sand - Dove Cameron

"Why did you call me?"

"Why did you come?"

There isn't a good answer to his question, so you choose to ignore it in favor of keeping your eyes on the road, your fingers holding tightly onto the steering wheel. You don't know what to tell him. You yourself aren't even sure why you came to that bar, why Seungmin is sitting in your passenger seat right now just because he was drunk and he wouldn't let anyone take him home but you.

"I asked you first," you say. It takes an effort to keep your voice even, an effort not to look over at him.

"Don't know," he sounds like he couldn't care less, but that's always been Seungmin for you. "Old habits die hard, I guess. You were the only one I used to call."

You round a corner without even having to look at the GPS. The route to his place is still ingrained in your brain even after all this time. On some nights when you feel too stuffy indoors, you would go on a walk by yourself. Directionless for an hour or two, you just want to feel the wind wrap around your body and solid ground beneath your feet.

On these same nights, you would find yourself at Seungmin's door.

It's always unintentional, the way your feet would carry you to his home without your permission.

"Used to," you reiterate. "Past tense. You don't get to call me anymore. I'm not your chauffeur."

You feel his eyes on the side of your face. Then his voice, ever so calm and collected, "You came anyway, didn't you?"

His words irritate you for some reason, even though he means nothing bad. No malice in his voice; he's just simply stating a fact. You did come when he called, and perhaps the person that you're really annoyed with is only yourself, because why did you come?

He should be a stranger to you by now, and yet, you're here.

Maybe you know the answer. Maybe it's not a hard question at all.

You let the both of you wallow in silence for the rest of the drive. When you pull up to Seungmin's building about ten minutes later, you finally turn to cast your gaze upon him with your eyebrow slightly raised, a polite Get out if there ever was one.

Instead of taking the hint like a normal person and going on his merry way, he just stares at you with his big eyes and his hair still styled to perfection even after a night of celebrating and drinking. Seungmin loves to be difficult, this you can't ever forget.

"Well?" you press. "You're home."

He blinks, then swallows thickly. He looks around your car for a few seconds, unsure of himself. If he wasn't intoxicated, you would think he's trying to stall.

"I... I can't go up by myself," he says.

"Are you serious?"

He just nods, something expectant in his gaze.

"You're a grown man."

"Help me up." He doesn't sound all too drunk, but maybe he's just got a way of masking it because Seungmin would never outright ask for help. He's stubborn, and he thinks it makes him look weak. Incapable.

In the end, you give in to his request. You let him lean on you in the elevator on the way up to his floor, the scent of his cologne still overpowering the bourbon he had all night and it makes you just a little nostalgic.

At his door, you hold onto his waist and look away when he punches in the passcode. The door unlocks and this should be it for the two of you, your unexpected reunion should be ending the moment Seungmin crosses over to the other side of the threshold, but he just turns around and looks at you, his body against the frame of the door this time.

"There, you're home safely," you say. "I've done my part. Goodnight."

"Come in."

"Why?"

"I'm tired. Come in." And with that, Seungmin retreats into the apartment, leaving the door open for you to follow without any further explanation at all. For a moment, you stand there by yourself, not really sure of what to do. You hear him shuffling inside, before the sound of his body plopping onto the couch carries over to your ears.

What business do you have here? What business did you have with Seungmin in the first place today?

And yet, you find yourself trailing inside, closing the door behind you until the lock clicks into place. Maybe you're curious to see what the place looks like since the last time that you were here. The two of you never lived together - you weren't foolish enough to agree even though he did ask - but you were over often enough to consider this your second home.

Not much has changed. It's still the same minimalist four walls that you were used to. Same light gray paint, same black couch. Same framed signature of his favorite baseball player and same tiny crack in the decorative bowl on the coffee table. There's a photo on the credenza lying face down seemingly on purpose, but you don't say anything about it.

"What am I doing here?" you ask.

"Why did you come?" he shoots you the question for the second time tonight.

You blink at him. He only stares back.

"Why did you call me?" you repeat. "Why did you really call me?"

Questions thrown out but no answers received, like you're both running in circles, with neither of you knowing why you're even running in the first place.

Seungmin purses his lips before he stands up, the suddenness of the movement leaves him unsteady on his feet, makes him hold onto the couch's armrest for support. "Do you want some water?"

You bite the inside of your cheek. "Okay."

"Give me a second. Have a seat."

You watch as he pads into the kitchen a little wobbly, then returns a few minutes later with two glasses of water. He sits back down on the couch next to you, some distance dividing the two of you. He takes a sip, you do the same.

"Called you because I missed you," he says, casually admitting it like he was merely discussing the weather. The place hasn't changed, but maybe he has.

The last time you spoke to Seungmin was about six months ago, when he dropped off your things two weeks after you broke up. You haven't had any contact since, and that's exactly the way it should be for you and him now. You went your separate ways and that was it. A mutual agreement that hurts, but it was mutual nonetheless. For the past half a year, all he's been to you is a stranger. You know why it had to happen. You agreed to it.

But, just because you haven't talked, doesn't mean that you haven't thought of him. You wish he only crossed your mind in passing, wish your brain only conjured up the image of him whenever you saw something that he would like, or whenever you caught a glimpse of him on the TV or radio. In reality, it's been much more pathetic. You think of him almost every day, despite your best efforts to cleanse yourself of everything that's remotely related to the name Kim Seungmin. His absence carries itself with you all the time, a hollowness that seeps into every crevice of your life.

You know he means it. Seungmin doesn't lie, least of all to you. His honesty twists inside of you like a knife. Salt, meet wound.

You have no words to offer him, no response you can think of that would make sense to say out loud so you don't say anything. The only sound that falls from your lips is his name, like a warning, a plea, a consolation all at once.

But he doesn't seem to mind. Not his sudden vulnerability, not your reluctance to entertain that split second of honesty.

"I answered your question. Now you have to answer mine," he says. "Why did you come?"

"What do you want me to tell you?"

He doesn't respond right away. Instead, he takes a moment like he's mulling it over in his head. "Thought maybe you missed me too," he says eventually, ending the sentence with a bitter chuckle. "Just a little bit."

You tongue your cheek, stall with another sip of water before you place the glass on the table. On a coaster of course, Seungmin hates cup rings on his fancy table.

You lean back to rest on the couch, staring up at his boring ceiling. There are memories of you on this very couch, ones of you lying with your head on his lap as he plays with your hair, the two of you winding down after a long day. Or ones that are far too inappropriate to bring up ever again, of nights where you were both too desperate and impatient to take it to the bedroom. Those gentle reminders are still here somewhere, tucked between the cushions perhaps.

"Sure." You hum, nodding along. "Let's go with that."

Another chuckle, humorless. Though, you think he's pleased enough with that non-answer but you're not sure. He mirrors your position, falling into the couch with a sigh. From your peripheral vision, you think he's scooched closer to you, just by a few centimeters, in the process of settling into the sofa.

"My turn," you say. "Why do you want me here?"

"What is this, 21 questions?"

You shrug simply. "You asked me to come in. I'm just curious."

When Seungmin stays silent for a beat too long, you turn your head to watch him, thinking maybe he's knocked out because of the alcohol in his system. But you find him wide awake, his eyes staring ahead, looking like he's already sober.

His face is unreadable when he says, "Wanted to see something."

"See what?"

"See if something is still there."

It's your turn to remain quiet as you process his words, and it's Seungmin who has to turn to gauge your reaction.

"And? Is anything still there?" you ask.

"I don't know, you tell me. You're the one that stayed."

"Does it matter? If I say there is?"

"Of course it does."

"What would you do about it?"

He goes still once more. You know he doesn't have an answer to your question. What would he do? What could he even do? Patch things up only for them to fall apart again in a couple months? Once upon a time, you were naive enough to think that you could find a way to make it work. You had enough blind faith to think that it would all work out in the end; that if you wanted it enough, maybe the universe would let you have this one thing.

You return your gaze to the ceiling. He's shown you his cards, maybe it's only fair that you show him some of yours too.

An uncertain inhale, then the realization that this is the only time you would be able to have an honest conversation with him about this.

"Wanna hear something funny?" you ask.

"I have a feeling you're gonna tell me anyway."

It's anything but funny, and Seungmin is certain that you're not building up to a punchline. Sure, it's a little tragic that nothing matters, but there's some freedom, some comfort in that too. You can tell him everything that's plagued your mind for the past couple hundred days or so without having to worry about the repercussions. Even though not all is said, everything is already done.

"You know, you were mine before you were anyone else's," you say. You feel his eyes on the side of your face. The silence persists, and you aren't sure if you can take it as a sign to continue, but you do so anyway because at least he's not pumping the brakes on it, right? "I used to be jealous of your life. Toward the end, I mean."

"Jealous of what?"

"I don't know. Just your life, your dream. All of it."

Seungmin blinks. "You were jealous that I got to live my dream?"

"I said I was jealous of your life, not you," you correct him. "Because you always seemed to want everything else more than you wanted me."

"You make it sound like I was the bad guy." He turns a little defensive all of a sudden, an edge in his voice when he says, "That's not true."

You still remember him well enough to know that it is.

And it's not such a terrible thing; it's simply the truth. You can't fault him for having a dream and for having enough courage to see it through, even if it means unintentionally leaving you behind in the process. You could foresee the end even from the beginning. If you wanted to blame someone, you would have to blame yourself too.

You swerve around his metaphorical walls, his make-believe suit of armor. If you'd been nervous around Seungmin tonight, then that anxiety is now chipping away brick by brick the more you internalize the fact that nothing matters anymore.

"Remember your last show before we broke up? You were so happy, I was so proud of you. You belong on stage and I never wanted to take that away from you. But then I noticed the crowd, the thousands of people out there cheering your name and I realized that I would never compare to them. Their praise meant more to you than mine, and it was only a matter of time before you outgrew me to look for bigger and better spotlights.

"I'm not saying you were wrong for any of it. I don't blame you. You were always going to outgrow me. It's sad, but it's okay. I always knew that you'd have to leave me behind at some point. It's on me too; I just fell too hard too fast for someone who could never stay. It's your dream, you can't help it. But that night... that was the nail in the coffin for me, knowing that one day, to you, I would be just one of the faces in a crowd that you can't even tell apart."

It doesn't hurt as much as you thought it would. In fact, it's even a little cathartic to pour out the words that have been sitting heavy on your chest. Although it's not until a single tear spills over that you realize your eyes have welled up somewhere along the way. You quickly wipe it away with your thumb, then you feel his hand reach for yours after a few beats.

Seungmin calls your name, and you can hear the regret in his voice. When you look at him, his eyes have softened, no longer on the defense now that you've beat him to the offense. "I'm not drunk enough to forget about this in the morning, you know," he says.

"Does it matter? What are you going to do about it in the morning?" you ask. "We're already broken up. It's not like we can go anywhere from here. But at least now you know what it was like for me."

It seems to be a common theme tonight - stretches of silence in between admissions of truth so that one of you can gauge the other's reaction, trying to assess what path would be worth it to take at this crossroad you find yourselves unable to move on from.

Then he's tugging on your hand, pulling you to him until you're in each other's orbit again. Close enough for him to wrap his arm around you. Close enough that you're weak, not that you were ever that strong to begin with. It doesn't really come as a surprise that you let him.

"I..." Seungmin starts, full of uncertainty as he tries to string together a sentence. "We could go back."

This isn't a surprise either, that you're considering his words.

"What happens when it ends again?"

You can practically taste the residual bourbon on his breath when he leans into you, his lips brushing your cheek just slightly. "Then it ends again," he says, a little pained, all too selfish. "But it'll be worth it. It's worth it to me."

"What if it's not what I want? What if it's not worth it to me?"

He pulls back, putting some distance between your faces so he could see you better, the deep brown of his eyes searching for something that you're both aware of.

"You came tonight," he murmurs, as if that in and of itself is a sufficient enough explanation. "You stayed."

Not all is said, but everything is already done.

You had chance after chance after chance to leave, to shut this down - whatever this is - but you didn't, not even once. You're still a willing participant even though you've lived through this ending before. You know he loved you, know he loves you even if the way he goes about it is selfish.

Because you do know the answer to his questions. It's clear as day; anyone can see it from a mile away.

When your world eventually comes crashing down again some time from now, you won't blame Seungmin. You won't blame yourself either, despite having option to walk away from all of this right now.

Because maybe some pains are worth enduring twice, aren't they?

Why did you come? Why did you stay?

Is anything still there?

all rights reserved © withleeknow. reposting, translating and/or modifying is not permitted by any means. [posted 08.06.2024]

[d-dixonimagines]

PROMPT: "Thought you'd be taller.."

I feel like I want to do this one again with a different approach, but I don't know. I envisioned it being something light-hearted and fun, so please excuse my attempt at being funny...! @darylsdelts A/N: It's not edited so there's probably typos

There was a weird buzz of energy going around the camp that you couldn't quite place. The way people whispered to one another excitedly like gossiping teenagers. Eventually you got wind that Daryl Dixon was supposed to be arriving. It was overheard on the radio when your group leader was communicating with Aaron, arranging some kind of supply drop. They had been talking for months and were finally closing on a deal to join forces and create connections.

Sure, you had heard Daryl's name before, but it was strange to see people act like it was some celebrity coming through their town, a behavior you thought was long dead when everything fell. He had been the talk for days, apparently. People telling stories about all the things they've heard he's done, even some you were sure couldn't possibly be true, like blowing up a group with a bazooka? It sounded ridiculous.

He had managed to gain a sort of reputation. He was the lone wolf you didn't mess with. People have said that he mostly kept to himself, some describing him as a grumpy old bear, and good luck if you ever got on his bad side.

You've heard he was mean and intimidating and had a permanent glare, but others say he is kind and had a softness to him. That he had a type of charm that was hard to explain. But it was all the same as rumors go; you didn't know what you were supposed to believe.

He had come to the camp a few times, but somehow you've never seen or met him yourself. It was like he was a myth. A story someone made up, and depending on which version you heard, he was either a scary boogeyman or some kind of hero.

None of that mattered, though. You were determined to find out for yourself who this Daryl guy really was, and if he was worth all of the commotion he seemed to cause.

The sun was just about to set when he and Aaron finally arrived. They were greeted with welcoming smiles and were invited to join you all for dinner. You were appreciative of the large cart of food and supplies they brought, but so far you weren't seeing anything too spectacular. He was quiet, mostly. Handing over crates and stuff, no particular look about him. He didn't look scary, there was no scowl-y expression. So many not a grumpy bear?

As the evening went on and everyone was settled, scattered about around the fire, you sat silently - continuing to watch him. When it was mostly just the two of you remaining, you decided that the silent stalking was getting you nowhere, so you took things to the next level; you approached him..

"Would you like some more?" You offered, extending the kettle of food you had in your hand. He looked up at you for a second before shaking his head, "Nah, I'm good.. Thanks." His voice was gruff, but there was a softness to it, it didn't make sense!

"I'll have some more." Your attention was brought to Larson, a guy from your group, who was sitting close by with his plate stretched out, a friendly smile on his face. Without saying a word, you took a step towards him and practically tossed the kettle in his lap, taking a seat next to Daryl, your back towards Larson.

There was a silence again, aside from the confused mumblings from Larson as he dished himself more food. You tried not to make it so obvious that you were eyeing Daryl, trying to glance at the fire every now and then, but you were failing quite miserably.

"Can I help ya with somethin'?" Daryl finally confronted you. When you didn't respond he continued. "You've been starin' me down since I got here and it's startin' to weird me out..."

You straightened up a bit and put your hands up briefly, an attempt to express you didn't mean anything by it. "I'm sorry. I'm just... trying to figure you out." "Whats'ta figure out, exactly?" he remained calm, but you could tell he had a guard up. Which was understandable.

You have a quick shrug as you tried to gather your thoughts. "The way people talk about you, you're at all what I expected." He gave a sight grunt, like where this was going all clicked. "Should I even ask what you were expectin'?" "Thought you'd be taller.." Your response surprised him a bit, causing him to let out a chuckle. Your shoulders relaxed at his reaction. He definitely wasn't a boogeyman type.

"There were a lotta things you could'a said, but I wasn't expectin' that one," he shook his head a bit and set his dish down by his feet. You could understand where he thought you were going, so many mixed reactions to him, but you were feeling more inclined to believe the positive ones, based on your current encounter with him.

"There was a lot of buzz around here when people learned you were visiting. They talk about you like you're some kind of celebrity. Which, I guess in some sense, you kind of are. With all the stuff you've done, you've made quite a name for yourself."

"Pshh.." he scoffed, "I don't buy into all that. People's opinions don't mean shit." "Even if it's good? People look up to you, from what I gather." He shook his head again. "It's all bullshit. They don't know me or the shit I've done." "We've all done things. Larson here?" you pointed your finger over your shoulder, Daryl's eyes following the direction, "the worst thing he's probably done is kill a rabbit, and that's saying something when it comes to him, and while he's probably not the best example, we all still know he's a good person."

Larson looked up from his plate, his gaze going back and forth between you and Daryl. "It was an accident..." Larson defended himself, a silent look of panic etched on his face. "The rabbit, I didn't see it, it was in the -" "You don't have to explain, Larson, it's OK. No one blames you." You cut him off before looking back at Daryl. "...Why would they blame me..?" "It was a whole thing.. but that's not the point. I'm just saying, the stuff you do makes a difference to people. The good stuff, I mean."

Daryl looked confused for a second, trying to figure out Larson's deal, but brought his attention back to you. "I dunno about any of that. I ain't tryin' to be anythin', I'm just doin' what anybody else would." You nodded, planning on keeping things at that, but there was one thing you couldn't get out of your head and needed answers on.

"I just have one question," you opened. He seemed almost reluctant to agree, but he did with a nod. "Is it true you shot a bazooka at some group? Some people say there was a group of like fifty highwaymen and you just blew them all up." He looked at you for a second like you were insane and let out a sigh. "There weren't fifty of 'em, there was only about eight.." "But you blasted them with a bazooka?" "Yeah?" he responded like he didn't understand what the big deal was. "They were a bunch'a assholes, they had it comin'."

"No, I completely get it," you let out a small laugh. "It's just a crazy thing to think about, you know? A bazooka! Where the hell would you even get one of those?" "Military truck," both Daryl and Larson answered at the same time, causing you both to look at him. "Sorry, I keep forgetting you're there." You almost felt bad. "Anyway, I should get going. It was cool to meet you," you turned back to Daryl and stood up, talking some of the empty dishes. Daryl gave a nod as you walked off.

"... The rabbit incident really was an accident," Larson chimed in after a moment of silence; he was leaning towards Daryl like he was trying to keep it between the two of them. "It was in the -" "Let it go, Larson!" Two other people in the group shouted at the same time. Larson slammed his plate on his lap in frustration as he was interrupted once more and he straightened up. Daryl sat there awkwardly in silence for a moment before getting up himself. He walked passed Larson and gave a quick sympathetic pat on his shoulder. "It's alright, buddy. I believe ya.." Daryl let out an amused scoff as he walked away to find Aaron.