#Not Dollars

[top-secret-replier]

For my thousandth post I present to you

The gay 50p

[whydidisavethistomyphone]

Elon got twitter banned in Brazil, big win for bluesky.

[foldingfittedsheets]

Mattresses, unbeknownst to many, are a lot like cars. Every year new ones roll out, they’re always tweaking and innovating and you’ll never find the same one you loved decades ago when buying a new one.

Where I sold mattresses had a three month return or exchange program for this reason. New beds take a while to break in, and they’re a big expense. Your body is used to the old one. So we made sure people were loving it. If a bed got returned we’d take it back, sanitize and clean it, then sell it again on clearance.

To sell these we always had to disclose what clearance meant to customers, and they had to sign that they knew what they were getting. (FYI, not every company is as… forthright about the used bed situation)

In clearance we had beds that were floor models, we had returns, and more rarely we had old models whose line had been discontinued. These clearance beds were always final sale, so a bed could only be sold twice.

Now, the manager at the store I was working at had realized a vital fact. Clearance beds in the warehouse didn’t sell, especially old models that salespeople weren’t familiar with. And even more especially in odd sizes, like twin extra longs. So he set up a split king on the showroom floor to exhibit clearance beds, pulling all those forgotten twin extra longs out onto the showroom.

Almost all of these were brand new discontinued models. Beds I’d never learned in training were exhumed to be displayed. The manufacturers had moved on to new lines and they’d been left behind. Why would he take such in interest in selling old stock, you might wonder? Because we made double commission on the sales margin of clearance beds, and if we’d had a bed long enough they dropped the cost in the system so it was a fucking cash cow to sell these. Even with huge discounts the commissions were wonderful so it was a win win.

When I got started I was jazzed about this program, I was so on board to sell weird old brand new beds and make a ton of money. I had a wonderful older couple come in, looking for a split king adjustable set. This was a white whale sale.

The current clearance models on the floor were a latex mattress that was brand new despite being of an age to start first grade, and a tempurpedic floor model. The couple laid down and it was like magic. They each loved the bed they’d laid down on. They wanted to buy the whole shebang.

I. Was. Thrilled. I told them about the clearance program and what that meant, and they weren’t bothered in the least. I wrote up the sale then dashed into the back, fizzing with excitement to tell my manager what I’d done.

“You sold the death bed?!” He asked in delight.

I pulled up short, my smile freezing in place. “What…?”

“Didn’t you check the notes?”

I hesitated for a long beat then slowly shook my head. You see, dear reader, all beds had a personal history. Every clearance bed had logs written up by the person who took the return, as well as warehouse crew after sanitizing. It helped us know what to expect when selling them. “Wasn’t it just a floor model? You said it was a floor model…”

He slowly shook his head. I checked the notes.

It turned out, it had been sold as a floor model. The first time. But the company had made an exception and taken it back as a return two months later. Why? Because it’s owner had passed away.

I stared at the computer in horror and my manager shrugged. “They signed the clearance form. Technically it was a floor model.”

“We know for a fact that a man died in that bed!”

“What they don’t know can’t haunt them,” he said philosophically.

The man came back a week later for more sheets, utterly delighted to tell me how well they were sleeping. I clamped my teeth down around the secret of the deathbed, choosing to let them love their new bed without the stigma. Only one person would be haunted by that deathbed, and it was me.

[wormy-business]

I saw this question posed on tiktok, but I think Tumblr would really enjoy it too.

If a fae creature offered to give one million dollars for a bone FROM YOUR BODY chosen at random, how many bones would you allow them to take?

Light clarifications; The fae is not the one choosing the bones. The bone is taken at random. Each bone, no matter the size or importance, is worth a full million dollars. You must also declare the exact number first, you can't go bone-by-bone. You either say 2 or you say 10, you can't work your way up to a higher number. The bones are removed instantaneously, and the money is given immediately as well. You will not get in government trouble for acquiring the money.

Tell me in the tags/replies how many bones you'd let the fae take. And as always, reblog for bigger sample size.

[official-lucifers-child]

still thinking about the brainrot that fast fashion has caused in people, like i made this pair of pants that are black and white with a cool flowery design, and an acquaintance saw them and said "wow i'd pay like 20 dollars for you to make me a pair" and i could barely think with how utterly horrified i was at that; i told them that 20 dollars wouldn't even cover the materials, let alone the hours of work that went into cutting, sewing, ironing, hemming, altering, etc. they just had this look on their face when i told them that, when i said i wouldn't make them a pair for even 100 dollars because that was still way too low of an amount, a look that said "you're crazy for thinking that those cost 100 dollars" and maybe i am crazy but holy shit, 20 dollars for a pair of handmade, durable, lined pants fitted specifically to your measurements? 20 dollars for upwards of 60 hours of work? 20 dollars for several yards of high-quality fabric, thread, and buttons? 20 dollars???

[inkskinned]

i got rickrolled today but it didn't work because i have adblocker installed, so youtube just told me i violated the terms of service. yesterday i was trying to edit a picture as a joke for my girlfriend, and google made me check a box to prove i'm human because i wasn't "searching normally".

it isn't just that capitalism is killing fun and whimsy, it is that any element of entertainment or joy is being fed upon by this mosquito body, one that will suck you dry at any vulnerability.

do you want to meet new friends in your city? download this app, visit our website, sign up for our email list. pay for this class on making a terrarium, on candlemaking, on cooking. it will be 90 dollars a session. you can go to group fitness, but only under our specific gym membership. solve the puzzle, sign up for our puzzle-of-the-month-club. what is a club if not just a paid opportunity - you are all paying for the same thing, which makes you a community.

but you're like me, i know it - you're careful, you try the library meetings and the stuff at the local school and all of that. the problem is that you kind of want really specific opportunities that used to exist. you are so grateful for libraries and the publicly-funded things: they are, however, an exception - and everything they have, they've fought tooth-and-nail to protect. you read a headline about how in many other states, libraries have virtually nothing left.

do you want to meet up with your friends afterwards? gift your friends the discord app. you can choose to go to a cafe (buy a coffee, at least), a bar (money, alcohol) or you can all stay in and catch a movie (streaming) or you can all stay in bed (rent. don't get me started) and scream (noise complaint. ticket at least).

you want to read a new book, but the book has to have 124 buzzwords from tiktok readers that are, like, weirdly horny. you can purchase this audiobook on audible! your podcast isn't on spotify, it's on its own server, pay for a different site. fuck, at least you're supporting artists you like. the art museum just raised their ticket price. once, they had a temporary exhibit that acknowledged that ~85% of their permanent art galleries were from cis white men, and that they had thousands of works by women (even famous women, like frida! georgia o'keefe!) just rotting in their basement. that exhibit lasted for 3 months and then they put everything away again.

walmart proudly supports this strip of land by the street! here are some flowers with wilting leaves. its employees have to pay out-of-pocket for their uniforms. my friend once got fined by the city because she organized a community pick-up of the riverfront, which was technically private property.

no, you cannot afford to take that dance class, neither can i. by the way - i'm a teacher. i'm absolutely not saying "educators shouldn't be paid fairly." i'm saying that when i taught classes, renting a studio went from 20 bucks an hour to 180 in the span of 6 months. no significant changes to the studio were made, except they now list the place as updated and friendly. the heat still doesn't work in the building. i have literally never seen the landlord who ignores my emails. recently they've been renting it out at night as an "unusual nightclub; a once-in-a-lifetime close-knit party." they spent some of those 180 dollars on LEDs and called it renovating. the high heels they invite in have been ruining the marley.

do you want to experience the old internet? do you want to play flash games or get back the temporary joy of club penguin? you can, you just need to pay for it. i have a weird, neurodivergent obsession with occasionally checking in to watch the downfall and NFT-ification of neopets. if i'm honest with you all - i never got into webkins, my family didn't have the money to buy me a pointless elephant. people forget that "being poor" can mean literally "if i buy you that toy, i can't afford rent."

you and i don't have time to make good food, and we don't have the budget for it. we are not gonna be able to host dinner parties, we're not made of money, kid. do you want some kind of 3rd space? a space that isn't home or work or school? you could try being online, but - what places actually exist for you? tiktok counts as social media because you see other people on it, not because they actually talk to you.

there was a local winter tradition of sledding down the hill at my school. kids would use pizza boxes and jackets and whatever worked, howling and laughing. back in september, they made a big announcement that this time, rules were changing, and everyone must pay 10 dollars to participate. when im not scared shitless, i kind of appreciate the environmental irony - it hasn't gone below 40. so much for snow & joyriding.

i saw a bulletin for a local dogwalking group and, nervous about making a good first impression, showed up early. the first guy there grimaced at me. "sorry," he said. "there's a 30-dollar buy-in fee." i thought he was joking. wait. for what? the group doesn't offer anything except friendship and people with whom to walk around the city.

he didn't know the answer. just shrugged at me. "you know," he said. "these days, everything costs money."

[butchniqabi]

here's list of Palestinians who have reached out to me, please donate if you can

posted august 23rd 2024

@ahmed-mohammed1 vetted here €4,935/€30,000

@hadeelmekki vetted here €15,295/€35,000

@mohiy-gaza vetted here $17,546/$31,000

@yazanfamilly vetted here €10,695/€50,000

@olagaza vetted here (line 205) $29,723/$50,000

@ahmedalnabeeh11 vetted here €23,008/€30,000

@save-mohamed-family vetted here (line 192) $9,946/$50,000

@wafaaresh6 vetted here €28,300/€100,000

@atalah-mohammed vetted here €12,735/€82,000

@abdullahgaza vetted here (line 81) €81,851/€120,000

@save-ahmed-family1 €1,023/€20,000

@asmaayyad vetted here €11,646/€45,000

@bisanalbalawi18 vetted here €37,551/€50,000

@ezzaldeens-blog €297/€20,000

@yousefjehad3 vetted here (line 255) $3,487/$15,000

@hanaa-yousef vetted here (line 246) £11,071/£20,000

@noor-alanqar vetted here €20,427/€40,000

@mahmoud-1995 vetted here $11,709/$50,000

@sabahfamily £7,570/£50,000

@fatma--gaza vetted here €5,530/€20,000

@nisreensuhail vetted here €1,984/€50,000

@sameer-family vetted here $2,259/$50,000

@abdelmutei €10,718/€25,000

@safaabed8 vetted here €28,261/€90,000

@kareem-family vetted here €7,252/€20,000

@ahmedhelllis vetted here €10,473/€80,000

@asmaamajed2 vetted here $3,570/$50,000

@shimaajoj2 €3,302/€50,000

@nourfamily1989 vetted here $14,240/$90,000

[samerpal]

🚨Trapped Family in Gaza Appeals for Help to Survive🚨 🕊️🇵🇸 🍉🌹

Hi 👋 my friends My name is Samer Abu Ras, and I am reaching out to you with a heavy heart and shattered hopes after the war in Gaza destroyed my life and my family’s. Our days were once filled with peace and security, but now we are homeless, without shelter or income, facing a bleak future. My wife Shorouq and our three children are suffering from psychological and health traumas due to this catastrophe. We lost our home and our jobs, and now we seek warmth in cold streets.

“Please note, The goal of our fundraising campaign is to raise $43,000, which is = equivalent to 450,000 SEK.

My friends, the currency used in the fundraising campaign is the Swedish Krona (SEK), and every 50 SEK is equivalent to 5 USD.”

10$ = 100 SEK

50$= 500 SEK

100$= 1000 SEK

200$= 2000 SEK

My original story link

🕊️🇵🇸Member at Gaza vetters🇵🇸🕊️

🇵🇸🍉🌹🇵🇸🍉🌹🇵🇸🌺🍉🌺🍉🇵🇸🌹🌺🇵🇸🍉🌺

My children 🧒 👧 , who once lived in safety, are now gripped by fear and displacement. As a father, I feel deep sorrow and helplessness for not being able to protect them. Today, I am making a humanitarian plea, asking for assistance to rebuild our lives and find a safe and stable environment. Every donation, no matter how small, will make a significant difference in our lives.

Let us make hope triumph over despair and restore smiles and dignity to my family.

Thank you to everyone who listens to my plea and offers a helping hand and donation to change our future for the better.

With heartfelt gratitude and appreciation

Note our campaign vetted by

@sar-soor @el-shab-hussein @nabulsi @ibtisams

Verification source: number 196 on users el-shab-hussein and nabulsi's master list

Attached is my Instagram account, my friends, for more information and details.

@schoolhater 🌹@victoriawhimsey 🌹

@pocketsizedquasar-2 🌹

@turtletoria 🌹 @rinnie

@ut-against-genocide 🌹

@ethanscrocs 🌹 @punkitt-is-here 🌹 @plomegranate 🌹 @gazavetters 🌹

[moncuries]

guess what i watched on new years (a redraw kind of)

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

"smart appliances" fuck u i want them dumb as a brick and incidentally as sturdy and enduring

[callmeurrbunny]

i'm just a kid

i never use my brain

i only use my heart

and my imagination

[thedupshadove]

Inspired by some other polls that have been going around lately, I'm trying to see something:

[mattmonss]

zoomies

some frames

[evilsexy]

[shiftythrifting]

They had the audacity to hide this gem behind a Johnny Cash picture.

Savers in the Chicago suburbs.

[katt1281]

i must not lie down on my bed with my phone. lying down with my phone is the time-killer. lying down with my phone is the little mistake that brings total academic obliteration. i will face my phone. i will permit it to show me my updated tumblr feed. and when i have scrolled past a few posts i will turn over my phone and place it down. where the procrastination has gone there will be nothing. only i will remain