#Original : Law and Order SVU

[youngeditor1999]

[saturncodedstarlette]

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯ ⋆✦⋆ ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

“You gotta trust me this is for the best.”

“Oh so I should trust you but you don’t trust me. How does that work?”

“You’re making this personal it’s not personal—”

“It is personal now!”

“Would you stop? Just talk to me!”

⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯ ⋆✦⋆ ⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯⎯

[robin-bring-the-snow]

The OG Squad

(The new squad)

[letters2fiction]

Welcome to Letters2fiction!

The concept here is to send in a question or a letter request, and you’ll get a response from your fictional character of choice, from the list below. Please stick to the list I’ve made, but of course, you can ask if there’s some other characters I write for, I don’t always remember all the shows, movies or books I’ve consumed over the years and I’m sure I’m missing a lot 😅

Status: New Characters added - Thursday March 21st, 2024

TV SERIES

A Discovery of Witches:

Matthew Clairmont

Baldwin Montclair

Gallowglass de Clermont

Marcus Whitmore

Philippe de Clermont

Jack Blackfriars

Sarah Bishop

Emily Mather

Diana Bishop

Ysabeau de Clermont

Miriam Shepard

Phoebe Taylor

Gerbert D’Aurillac

Peter Knox

Father Andrew Hubbard

Benjamin Fuchs

Satu Järvinen

Meridiana

Law and Order:

Rafael Barba

Sonny Carisi

Joe Velasco

Mike Duarte

Terry Bruno

Peter Stone

Hasim Khaldun

Nick Amaro NEW!

Mike Dodds

Grace Muncy

Kat Tamin

Toni Churlish

Amanda Rollins

Olivia Benson

Rita Calhoun

Casey Novak

Melinda Warner

George Huang

Sam Maroun

Nolan Price

Jamie Whelan

Bobby Reyes

Jet Slootmaekers

Ayanna Bell

Jack McCoy

Elliot Stabler

One Chicago:

Jay Halstead (Could also be Will if you want)

Antonio Dawson

Adam Ruzek

Greg "Mouse" Gerwitz

Dante Torres

Vanessa Rojas

Kevin Atwater

Sean Roman

Matt Casey

Kelly Severide

Joe Cruz

Sylvie Brett

Blake Gallo

Christopher Hermann

"Mouch"

Otis

Violet Mikami

Evan Hawkins

Mayans MC:

Angel Reyes

Miguel

Bishop

Coco

Nestor

911 verse:

Athena Grant

Bobby Nash

Henrietta "Hen" Wilson

Evan "Buck" Buckley

Eddie Diaz

Howie "Chimney" Han

Ravi Panikkar

T.K. Strand

Owen Strand

Carlos Reyes

Marjan Marwani

Paul Strickland

Tommy Vega

Judson "Judd" Ryder

Grace Ryder

Nancy Gillian

Mateo Chavez

The Rookie:

Lucy Chen

Tim Bradford

Celina Juarez

Aaron Thorsen

Nyla Harper

Angela Lopez

Wesley Evers

BBC Sherlock:

Greg Lestrade

Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock Holmes

Moriarty

Molly

Bridgerton:

Anthony Bridgerton

Benedict Bridgerton

Simon Basset

Daphne Bridgerton

Eloise Bridgerton

Kate Sharma

Edwina Sharma

Marina Thompson/Crane

Outlander:

Jamie Fraser

Claire Beauchamp Randall Fraser

Frank Randall

Black Jack Randall

Brianna Fraser

Roger MacKenzie

Fergus Fraser

Marsali Fraser

Jenny Fraser Murray

Ian Murray Sr.

Ian Fraser Murray

Murtagh Mackenzie

Call The Midwife:

Shelagh Turner / Sister Bernadette

Dr. Patrick Turner

Nurse Trixie Franklin

Nurse Phyllis Crane

Lucille Anderson

Nurse Barbara Gilbert

Chummy

Sister Hilda

Miss Higgins

PC Peter Noakes

Reverend Tom Hereward NEW!

Narcos:

Horacio Carrillo

Peaky Blinders:

Tommy Shelby

Downton Abbey:

Robert Crawley, Earl of Grantham

Cora Crawley, Countess of Grantham

Lady Mary Crawley

Lady Edith Crawley

Lady Sybil Crawley

Violet Crawley, Dowager Countess of Grantham

Isobel Crawley

Matthew Crawley

Lady Rose MacClare

Lady Rosamund Painswick

Henry Talbot

Tom Branson

Mr. Charles Carson

Mrs. Hughes / Elsie May Carson

John Bates

Anna Bates

Daisy Mason

Thomas Barrow

Joseph Molesley

Land Girl:

Connie Carter

Reverend Henry Jameson (Gwilym Lee's version)

Midsomer Murder:

DCI Tom Barnaby

Joyce Barnaby

Dr. George Bullard

DCI John Barnaby

Sarah Barnaby

DS Ben Jones

DS Jamie Winter

Sgt. Gavin Troy

Fleur Perkins

WPC Gail Stephens

Kate Wilding

DS Charlie Nelson

Sergeant Dan Scott

NEW! Once Upon A Time

Regina / The Evil Queen

Mary Margaret Blanchard / Snow White

David Nolan / Prince Charming

Emma Swan

Killian Jones / Captain Hook

Mr. Gold / Rumplestiltskin

Neal Cassidy / Baelfire

Peter Pan

Sheriff Graham Humbert / The Huntsman

Jefferson / The Mad Hatter

Belle

Robin of Locksley / Robin Hood

Will Scarlet

Zelena / Wicked Witch

Alice (Once in Wonderland)

Cyrus (Once in Wonderland)

Jafar (Once in Wonderland)

Gideon

Tiger Lily

Naveen

Tiana

Granny

Ariel

Prince Eric

Aladdin

Jasmine

Dr. Jekyll and Mr. Hyde

Hercules

Megara

Tinker Bell

Merida

Red Riding Hood

Mulan

Aurora / Sleeping Beauty

Prince Phillip

Cinderella

Prince Thomas

NEW! The Vampire Diaries / The Originals

Stefan Salvatore

Damon Salvatore

Caroline Forbes

Elena Gilbert

Bonnie Bennett

Enzo St. John

Niklaus Mikaelson

Elijah Mikaelson

Kol Mikaelson

Rebekah Mikaelson

Freya Mikaelson

Finn Mikaelson

Mikael

Esther

Marcel Gerard

Davina Claire

MOVIES

The Pirates of the Caribbean:

Captain Jack Sparrow

Barbossa

Will Turner

Elizabeth Swann

James Norrington

Kingsman:

Merlin

Harry Hart

Eggsy Unwin

James Spencer / Lancelot

Alastair / Percival

Roxy Morton / Lancelot

Maximillian Morton / The Shepherd

Orlando Oxford

Jack Daniels / Whiskey

Gin

BOOKS

Dreamland Billionaire series - Lauren Asher:

Declan

Callahan

Rowan

Iris

Alana

Zahra

Dirty Air series - Lauren Asher:

Noah

Liam

Jax

Santiago

Maya

Sophie

Elena

Chloe

Ladies in Stem - Ali Hazelwood books:

Olive

Adam

Bee

Levi

Elsie

Jack

Mara

Liam

Sadie

Erik

Hannah

Ian

Fourth Wing - Rebecca Yarros:

Xaden Riorson

Dain Aetos

Jack Barlowe

Rhiannan Matthias

Violet Sorrengail

Mira Sorrengail

Lillith Sorrengail

Bodhi Durran

Liam Mairi

[professorwerewolfmcwerewolf]

Sweet Barisi Headcanon:

Barba and Carisi spend a lot of time in Barba's office. With Barba working on the current case and Carisi studying. Occasionally, Barba will pose a question he already has his solution to just to challenge Carisi. Other times, Carisi will ask genuine hypotheticals he's curious about.

[nophunleague]

stare decisis: chapter one - novus

novus: latin for new

wc: 1,043

rafael barba x original female character

Quinn Brady glances at the name she had scribbled on a bright pink sticky note, Rafael Barba, she confirms that it matches the name on the door before walking up to the desk of his assistant. She's a beautiful woman, Quinn can tell she's tall before she even stands up. 

"Hey, good morning. My name is Quinn Brady. Mr. McCoy sent me," the woman nods knowingly. 

"I'll let Mr. Barba know you're here," she disappears through the double doors of the office briefly before coming back out. "You can go on in," she smiled. Quinn thanks the woman and then enters the office. 

"Mr. Barba, I'm Quinn Brady, the DA just pulled me over from Queens," she holds her hand out for a shake, his large warm hand covers her pale cold one with a firm grasp. He's intimidating, she notices, arrogant too. 

She's attractive, he can't deny that. Slender, only a few inches shorter than him, with freckles covering her cheeks and nose, and ginger hair that compliments those freckles so nicely. Shamefully he admits to himself that having a woman sitting with him at counsel table during trial will also help with the jury, probably the DA's exact thought. 

"The DA told me you were coming over, what department were you in?"

"Gangs," she smirks as she places a hand on her hip. Her petite stature always allowed her to be underestimated, especially when it came to prosecuting gang-related crimes. 

"Well you've certainly made some enemies then," he smirks, he has too.

"Definitely, I'm sure you've done the same. You have quite the reputation," his phone vibrates in his hand and he tears his eyes from hers to glance at it. 

"Well, welcome to SVU. The squad just caught a case, so we can go over the precinct and I can introduce you to them," he grabs his coat from the coat hanger by the door. He passes right in front of Quinn, and the warm embrace of his evergreen cologne wafts through her senses.  "I need to warn you about them, they're passionate, and don't understand what we go through as ADAs."

"Oh, have you ever met a cop who does?" She quips, and a light flashes through his eyes. Maybe he's met his match. They share a cab, on the DA's office's dime. It's close quarters for newly acquainted coworkers but they make it work. She’s first to break the silence.

"So where did you go to law school," Quinn looks over, his nonverbal markers tell her everything she needs to know. He's an Ivy League guy. 

"Harvard, you?"

"Georgetown."

"Did you stay in D.C. after graduation?” He knows most people do, so in his mind it’s a stupid question. 

“For a few years, I bounced around for a while until I ended up in New York,” she watches closely as the yellow cab pulls up to the 16th precinct, the large building home of New York City’s elite squad of detectives. 

“Well, let’s go see what they have for us,” they make their way up the exterior stairs and then up the elevator to the squad room. 

A short blonde woman is waiting at the elevator doors when they open, she doesn’t give Quinn a second glance, her eyes are only set on Barba. 

“We need a warrant.”

“For what? For who? Why? I don’t care what you think you need, I care about what you have,” Rafael grunts and storms past the detective; Quinn follows on his heels. She’s unintentionally led right into the middle of the squad, four other people are gathered around a few desks, talking about the evidence they think they could obtain. 

“Barba, great, we need a warrant,” an older brunette woman.

“Yeah, that’s what Rollins said, but why do you think you need a warrant?”

“Josh Casey consulted some telephone attorney based on his cell records. But if it was only a consultation then he’s not a client and attorney-client privilege doesn’t apply. So we need the attorney’s records from their consultation,” a lanky, blond but graying, man says animatedly. Quinn takes in the room, they still haven’t noticed her. Just as Barba opens his mouth to respond Quinn butts in instead.

“Those records are more than likely protected by work product, so you’re not going to get those.”

“Who are you?” a Hispanic man with dark hair asks. 

“Quinn Brady, your new ADA,” she studies the looks of shock between her and Barba. Maybe that wasn’t the best way to say that she was joining the team. 

“What the hell, you’re leaving?” the brunette woman asks Barba.

“No, he’s not leaving, there’s two of us now. DA’s orders,” Quinn answers for him. 

“Brady, this is Sergeant Olivia Benson, Detectives Amanda Rollins, Fin Tutola, Nick Amarao, and Dominic Carisi,” Barba points to everyone as he says their name. 

“You can call me Sonny,” Carisi blurts as soon as Barba says his name. Quinn looks at the man’s outstretched hand but ignores it.

“Yeah, right. And even if it is not all protected by work product, whatever attorney Casey winds up with next would probably instruct him to say he thought the phone attorney was his actual attorney. So then it’s protected by attorney-client privilege.”

“AKA, we’re not getting you a warrant. But thanks for the time for introductions. Call us when you actually have something,” Barba smirks while Quinn pulls out a pen and a bright pink sticky notepad from her coat pocket. She jots down her cell and office numbers on it and hands it to Liv. 

“My cell is the best way for you to contact me, but I’m also right across from his office,” she motions to Barba as she hands it over. Liv holds up the sticky note and thanks her for it. Barba and Quinn leave the precinct together leaving the squad stunned hi her wake.

“Not only did he just meet his match, but I think we’ve met ours,” Liv says as they walk away. 

“Yeah well I think I’m going to marry her,” Sonny smiles.

“And when she finds out you’re in law school and were still pushing for that warrant?” Rollins asks.

“Yeah well I guess that’s not a good look is it?”

[saiilorstars]

Ch. 60: The Waiting Game

Previous chapters // Montserrat’s masterlist

Fandom: SVU // Pairing: Rafael Barba x OC

Warnings: Due to the nature of the series’ plots, I do have to rate this as ‘mature’ for constant mentions of rape.

Taglist: @ocappreciationtag​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @arrthurpendragon​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @anotherunreadblog​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @maaaaarveeeeel​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @stareyedplanet​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @averyhotchner​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @abzidabzy​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @hellofutur​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @foxesandmagic​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​ @xovalliegirlxo @sam-i–am @kmc1989 @midmourn @choosejoyangel​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​​

[If you’d like to be added to this specific OC’s stories/edits, send me a message

When Montserrat woke up from her Nyquill-induced nap, she very quickly realized she slept way more hours than she intended to. It was past noon, almost four. Granted she was truly well rested but that was not the point. She still felt mentally exhausted and wasn't equipped for what had to come next. She had to finally call Lucia and tell her what happened — it was the worst conversation she ever had with the woman. Lucia was livid with Montserrat, to say the least.

"How could you not tell me before!? Why are you barely telling me!?"

Montserrat could barely give her reasons when Lucia went on a rampage in the Spanish and English language to the point where Montserrat couldn't dream of understanding. The only thing Montserrat managed to hear was that Lucia was on her way to the hospital and pretty much cut all ties with his son's girlfriend.

Great. That would be fun explaining to Rafael when he woke up. It was definitely about the last thing he needed in his life right now. After that, Montserrat soon found out that somehow Casey had gotten involved with the whole thing.

"Yeah, that was my fault," Kara said with a hand raised in the air. "I suggested it."

"Why?" Montserrat couldn't understand what a robbery had to do with her cousin at the moment. Then again, she was only really thinking with about a 50% capacity.

Kara understood her mistake too late and was left squandering for a reasonable excuse (otherwise this time Sonny would have a true reason to kill her). "Well, uh, Casey's another prosecutor and she'll maybe take the case? If they find the guy?"

"It's just not her case yet," Montserrat insisted, although it seemed like the heat was now going more towards the situation rather than Kara (or Casey for that matter). "Nobody's been murdered."

"And it'll stay like that," Kara jumped on the chance to provide actual support to her friend. It was hard thinking this could turn into a homicide case rather than attempted murder. "You'll see."

Montserrat would've been more convinced if she didn't have other things on her mind. She kept getting voice-mail for Lucia's number, only reiterating how angry the woman was with her.

"She'll come around," Kara kept insisting as well, "She's stunned, like you were when you first got the call. It's just different. She's his mother, after all. Give her some days."

Montserrat nodded only because there was nothing else she could do, but it didn't mean it wasn't nagging at her in the meantime. "I need to go back to the hospital," she told Kara after lunch. She did Kara the solid of sticking around for that mealtime but it was about all she would do now. She'd been away from the hospital for way too long.

"What are you talking about? It's only been a couple hours," Kara pointed out. She would rather Montserrat stay for a bit more until she was less anxious and stressed.

"It's past noon now!"

"So?" Kara would love to hear an adequate reason why the time even mattered. "Montserrat, you need to rest."

"I already did!" Montserrat exclaimed. "Way more than I planned!"

Kara's eyes flickered to the side for a moment. The nyquil was still under wraps. Her phone started ringing and seeing it was Sonny, she urged Montserrat to wait for another 5 minutes. "Just let me take the call and see what's happened, okay?"

Montserrat groaned. "Fine! But I am leaving as soon as you're done, with or without you!"

Kara nodded and hurried to take the call. Montserrat took the first seconds to try and calm herself down. She didn't want to actually fight with Kara, not with anyone for that matter. They were all walking on eggshells around her already, thinking she was a ticking time bomb. It was hard staying afloat not knowing what the next day would bring, or even the next hour. Tears stung get eyes just thinking about the uncertainty.

Hearing the knock on the door somehow startled her greatly. She went to open it, presuming it would be Sonny on the other side only to find her father instead.

"Dad!" She gasped, stumbling back a step.

"Montserrat, how — woah! What's happened to you?" Thomas of course referred to his daughter's face of anguish.

Immediately, Montserrat whirled around, eyes wide as she took a few steps away from her father. She tried wiping her eyes quickly. "Dad, what are you doing here?"

"I got the day off and since it's been a while, I thought we could have lunch,, but..." Thomas trailed off, reaching forward for his daughter's shoulder. He gently turned her around and saw the same face as before, only this time it was slightly redder from the fervent rubbing at the eyes. "Now I'm seeing it's longer than I thought. Sweetheart, what's wrong?"

"Nothing, Dad," Montserrat shook her father's hand off her shoulder. "Just a rough day, that's all."

"No, no, no," Thomas shook his head, "Don't try to kid me. I know you, Montserrat. You've been crying and it looks like it's been going on for a while. What's happened?"

"Nothing, sheesh!" Montserrat exclaimed. Of course she would've been more convincing if her voice hadn't shaken towards the end. How the hell am I a detective? "Look, I can't do lunch today. Can we schedule another day?"

"I'm not going anywhere," Thomas declared, crossing his arms, "It looks like you've got explaining to do, young lady."

Montserrat glared at her father. This was the last thing she needed right now. Despondence, anxiety, and anger mixed into one did not bode well for anybody in the room. "Dad, I don't have time for this. Can we do this another day, please?"

Thomas raised an eyebrow at his daughter. Usually it was all he needed to warn her she was crossing a line with him.

She still knew that.

But she didn't back down this time.

"You've got 5 seconds to tell me what's going on with you," Thomas warned. "Five…four…"

Montserrat gawked at her father with incredulity. "Dad, you can't treat me like I'm five—"

"Three…two—"

"Dad, seriously!"

"One—"

"I SAID STOP!" Montserrat unintentionally yelled at her father.

Thomas was dumbfounded with such a frantic reaction from his daughter. Tears were coming to Montserrat's eyes and though it was partially out of guilt, there was something deeper going on. "Montserrat," he tried again, softly, "Sweetheart, what's—"

"Can you just go? I'm actually leaving right now too," Montserrat gestured to the door behind Thomas. "I have to—"

"Montserrat!" Kara called from the hallway seconds before emerging. "Sonny says he'll be by in 15 and he can take us to the hospital."

"Hospital!?" Thomas exclaimed.

Kara's eyes widened. She had no idea they were no longer alone. "Oops…"

Montserrat let out a heavy sigh. "Dad—"

"Why do you need to go to the hospital!?" Thomas started demanding. "Are you hurt?" He went to check himself but Montserrat swatted his hands away.

"Dad, stop!"

"Why do you need to go!? Do you feel alright? What am I saying — it's obvious you're not feeling well! You've been crying!"

"She has," Kara agreed solemnly.

"KARA!" Montserrat said loudly enough to make Kara flinch. "SHUT UP!"

"Don't yell at Kara like that," Thomas reprimanded his daughter, "Answer my question. Why are you going to the hospital right now?"

"Because…" Montserrat racked her head for a good answer that wouldn't give away such a terrible situation.

"Are you hurt?"

"No!"

"Then why—"

"Oh, just stop!" Montserrat resorted to pleading, something downright shocking to her father. "Please! Just stop!" Tears rolled down her cheeks as the weight of each of her problems finally culminated into one heavy load on her shoulders. "I'm not hurt! At least not physically because trust me, everything else right now hurts! I'm going to the hospital because my boyfriend's there because he's been shot, okay!? He's been shot and he hasn't woken up since it happened and I want to be there when he does — if he does! Now please stop berating me and just—" Montserrat ran into her father's arms where she finally burst into tears.

Thomas was utterly stunned. For the first couple of seconds, nothing of what Montserrat said had sunk in so while she hugged him, his arms were awkwardly on either side of him. Eyes wide, mouth hanging open, he met Kara's gaze. She nodded to confirm everything Montserrat had said. Her grim expression helped sell it too.

"When...when did you get a boyfriend?" Thomas looked down at his daughter but at the question, Montserrat only whimpered and retreated further into him, desperate to be hugged back. Thomas slowly did so, bringing one hand over her back and the other behind her head. "O-okay, um…that's...that's...bad..." He sighed. He was terrible when it came to things like these. Montserrat's teenage years had been quite an adventure in terms of boyfriends and dating but now at 30? He didn't know which age was worse. "I'm—I'm so sorry, sweetheart," he ultimately said, "Really. I — how did this happen?"

Montserrat pulled away to take a deep breath. Her face was stained with tears. "A robbery. The guy was trying to rob the shop Rafael was at and then he just shot...he shot…"

Kara remained absolutely silent and lowered her head. It killed her to keep the truth of the situation a secret from Montserrat. But if she knew the truth, it would make her feel even worse, she reminded herself.

"Okay, okay," Thomas cupped Montserrat's face, "Wipe those tears. We can go to the hospital right now."

"You'd come with me?" Montserrat sniffed. "You're not mad I didn't tell you—"

"It does not matter right now," Thomas said, "Besides, you're a grown woman — as tough as that is to deal with — and you can make whatever choices you want."

"I was going to tell you. That's why I asked about having dinner, remember?"

Thomas nodded. "Yeah, and I told you I was going out on a trip for a whole month. Okay, that was my fault then."

"Dad, you would really like him. I mean, he's sort of a smart-ass but then again so is Gael."

Thomas let out a low laugh. "Oh, is it just Gael?"

"Of course, why do you ask?"

Thomas barely held his next laugh in. "Right." He gave Montserrat a kiss on the forehead. "Are you ready to go?"

Montserrat nodded fairly quickly. "Yes, please, let's go!"

"Kara?" Thomas looked at the blonde behind them.

Kara waved them off with a hand. "I'll wait for my boyfriend. He was already on his way. Plus, I think there'll be a lot of talking done on that drive."

Thomas wholeheartedly agreed with her. His eyes drifted over to Montserrat who had the energy to appear more nervous than before. "Ready?"

Montserrat wasn't so sure anymore. Still, a ride to the hospital meant she would practically do anything.

~0~

Thomas started slowly, cautiously, and for that Montserrat appreciated but it didn't make things any less awkward nor tense.

"Dating your co-worker — isn't that against the rules?" Thomas wondered out loud. He stopped at an upcoming red light, giving him the opportunity to glance at his daughter.

Her tear-stained face was finally getting a glimpse of light. She had stopped crying for the moment — she just needed to clean her face.

"Not if you disclose," she answered quietly, "Which we did."

"Ah, okay, um...when was that?"

"Dunno, two months ago? Time sort of blurred…"

"Time 'blurred'?" Thomas let out a small chuckle.

Montserrat glanced at him, eyebrows knitted together. "What?" Her voice couldn't go any louder than a quiet tone. If not, she would've demanded the explanation.

"Nothing...it's just...usually when you feel like time has 'blurred', it's because you've been having a good time," Thomas explained. At the green light, he was no longer able to look at her.

Maybe it was for the best.

Montserrat shifted in her seat. She was not about to go into detail about her relationship to her father. "It's been different," she left it at that. It wasn't a lie but it didn't outright expose her either.

Thomas hummed. "I can see that. I've never seen you so distressed over someone like this."

"To be fair, none of my other boyfriends have ever been shot."

Thomas let out a small laugh. "True, but I also meant in general. I've noticed you've been more, uh, content lately. Because I don't know what made you leave behind your old job and place in Queens, but I know that you haven't been happy in a while. I like the change."

"I'm sorry for that," Montserrat mumbled, eyes downcast. However painful it was for her, she imagined it had to have been hard for her father as well. She wasn't the kindest to him in the beginning. She did what a victim typically does: push people away. She thought she did it perfectly. She left her old friends in Queens, her job. She put distance between her father, her brother, even her nieces, and Kara. She became a good liar, indeed.

"I wasn't expecting an apology," Thomas clarified, "And I certainly didn't need one. I'm your father. I just want to know that you're okay."

Montserrat smiled lightly. "I can tell you that before all of this, I was more than okay."

Thomas nodded. "I believe it. You were...happier, more than I'd seen you in a very long time. I would love to say that you were your old self again but it still isn't like that."

"Dad, I don't think I'll ever be the same as before," Montserrat said, figuring it was best to shatter that dream right now than let it keep going without a future. "But that's okay because the way I felt before all this, it was damn great." Her breathlessness was enough to take her word for it. It sounded like even she couldn't believe it.

Truthfully, sometimes she still couldn't.

It took very little for Montserrat to become accustomed to the idea of always feeling miserable on the inside and overall like she was simply floating through life. She had resigned herself to the idea that it would always be like that from now on. But things changed again and she couldn't be more grateful. It would be beyond cruel to lose it all again. Actually, Montserrat couldn't see herself getting past it all over again if she lost Rafael.

"No more tears," came Thomas' voice.

Montserrat snapped out of her thoughts to find there were new tears rolling down her cheeks. "Sorry," she sniffed, wiping the tears off with the backs of her hands.

"No need to be," Thomas told her, "I'm so sorry this is happening, sweetie. But let's have some faith that it'll be okay in the end."

"To be honest Dad…" Montserrat let out a low sigh, "I don't really do the 'faith' thing a lot anymore."

Thomas nodded silently. It wasn't much of a surprise. "The things you see at your job can't leave much hope in the world, I know."

"Mhm," Montserrat nodded. She could let her father believe it was all because of her job. It would be easier for him that way.

"But in times like these...who do you turn to for strength?" Thomas asked curiously. "People pray to God, or other saints or something. What do you pray to?"

"Nothing," Montserrat admitted. It had been a very long time since she turned to any type of religious prayer. She was non-practicing Catholic at this point. Don't tell Lucia. "Right now, I just think about Rafael and how he's strong enough to come back. You should see him in action, Dad. If I were that guy who shot him, I'd run. I've been on the receiving end a couple times and Rafael doesn't play. And I've only gotten a small taste of the real thing. He's scary. Ask Kara."

Thomas let out a small laugh. "Knowing you, you probably kept it going."

Montserrat nodded. "Hell yeah. He's not right until I say he's right." She shifted in her seat. "Although right now, I'd give anything to hear his smart-ass remarks. An argument. Anything."

Thomas stretched a hand out until he was able to find Montserrat's. "It'll be okay."

Montserrat didn't say much after that. She couldn't wait to see the end of the drive and be at the hospital again. Nick had tried sending her messages but it didn't look like the service in the hospital was doing so well. All his texts were coming in as 'incoming message'. It left Montserrat even more anxious. What if something happened while she was away!?

She practically ran through the hospital, leaving her father to do his best to keep up. "Nick!?" She called as soon as she saw the man in the waiting room. "Your messages weren't coming through! Did something happen?"

"Yeah," Nick nodded, eyes flickering past Montserrat to her father.

"That's my Dad," Montserrat said dismissively. She had no times for introductions right now. "What happened!? Is Raf—"

"He's awake," Nick thankfully cut Montserrat off. He presumed that she had assumed the worst with his answer.

The relief that washed over Montserrat was monumental and yet so short-lived. Nick didn't understand why.

"I wasn't here," she whispered, eyes falling, "I wasn't here for him. God — I told you people I shouldn't have left!"

"Montserrat, you needed to rest," Nick said, "Besides, he woke up like 15 minutes ago. His mom's in there with him right now." Apparently, he'd something really bad because Montserrat's face had paled to a ghostly shade.

"What?" She asked, sounding like she'd lost air as well. "N-n-n-n-no, tell me she just got here too. Please."

"Uuh…" Nick was utterly confused but he still had to answer with the truth and it was not what Montserrat wanted to hear. "She got here an hour ago."

"Crap," Montserrat let out a heavy sigh.

"Montserrat, what's wrong?" Thomas asked her, placing a hand on her shoulder. "You should be happy!"

"I am," Montserrat clarified, "But you don't understand. Lucia got very upset with me because I didn't call her immediately when this happened. I called her this morning instead because I thought there was no reason she should lose sleep when I was already here, waiting to hear how the surgery went. She didn't agree. She thought she should've been notified immediately."

"Okay, well, that was then, this is now. Things will change now that Rafael's awake. She was probably very scared too."

"I bet she was," Montserrat agreed, "But she's Rafael's mother. Where do you think he gets his temper from?"

Nobody would answer her. It was better to stay quiet and to help move things along, Olivia arrived shortly afterwards. She'd gotten the call from the doctors themselves as was protocol.

"Is he capable of answering?" She asked the two detectives.

"He might be too tired to remember things right now," Nick said, "I was with him for 10 minutes and he barely said anything about what happened."

"Maybe he doesn't want to talk about it," Montserrat said. "And he shouldn't if he's not ready."

Olivia nodded with her. "Yes, but it's worth asking, don't you think?"

The detective in Montserrat would make her agree but the civilian side of her made her shake her head. That was the part of her that wanted everyone to stay the hell away from Rafael until he was all better.

"There's his mom," Nick said when he saw Lucia emerging from the hallway.

Montserrat immediately pressed her clothes down as if Lucia were going to point them out and add to her fuel against Montserrat. She made herself front front center when Lucia joined them.

"How is he?" She immediately asked the older woman. "Is he — is he talking? Does anything hurt?"

"He had a bullet in his body so yes, he is in pain," Lucia answered sharply enough to have Montserrat wincing each time.

"Excuse me," Thomas cut in just as Montserrat was about to go on. He moved around Nick and Olivia to stand beside his daughter. "There's no need to be that kind of rude. You're both stressed and frightened."

"And who are you?" Lucia demanded, eyebrow raising.

"This is my father," Montserrat said hastily, truly wanting to avoid any kind of confrontation.

"Thomas Novak," Thomas introduced himself, "And I'd appreciate it if you didn't speak to my daughter like that."

Lucia didn't appreciate the tone used on her either. "Lucia Barba," she introduced herself in the same tone as Thomas, "And your daughter knows exactly why I'm upset." She crossed gazes with Montserrat.

"I'm sorry," Montserrat reiterated, sighing. "I didn't want you to go through a sleepless night. You nor Catalina."

"Don't take decisions that don't belong to you," Lucia retorted, "When it comes to my son, I need to be informed about everything that happens to him. I don't know why I didn't get the call in the first place. Do you?"

Montserrat lowered her head. She preferred not to answer for the moment.

"There's no need to argue," Olivia stepped in as well, "We all want the same thing, don't we? For Rafael to get better?"

"Of course," Lucia said incredulously. How dare they think otherwise?

"Okay," nodded Olivia, "Then I'd like to see him right now. I think Montserrat as well."

Montserrat nodded fervently. "I do," she said.

"Don't bother him with the unnecessary, please," Lucia warned as the two women started walking around her.

"I would never," Montserrat said sharply. "But I do want to catch whoever did this to him. And I will."

She followed Olivia down the hallway, preferring not to look back. She couldn't take whatever look Lucia must be giving her right now. She didn't have the head for it either.

"Montserrat," Olivia called twice before she was heard, "Forgive me for intruding but, have you taken some time for yourself with all this going on?"

"Are you kidding? I slept way more than I should have!" Montserrat exclaimed. "He woke up and I wasn't here!"

"I don't mean that," Olivia shook her head. "With this kind of stuff, I presume you would want to go see your therapist?"

"I don't have time for that!" Montserrat said dismissively. "I need to be here!"

Olivia suspected that mindset long before she got the courage to ask Montserrat. "It's important that you take care of yourself first. I'm sure Rafael would say the same thing."

It honestly didn't matter to Montserrat right now. She just wanted to reach the damn room herself and see with her own eyes that Rafael was awake. That's all she wanted. Olivia must have seen it because she didn't mention therapy again for the rest of the walk.

They didn't make a sound when they finally entered the room. If Rafael was really asleep, neither wanted to wake him. Questions would wait. But, as soon as they were in sight, Montserrat saw Rafael wide awake. He seemed a bit dazed but lucid enough to recognize them.

Montserrat forgot all about her conversation with Olivia and rushed forward. "Hii…" She said breathlessly, "You're still awake! You should be sleeping."

"I've done enough sleeping," Rafael muttered, sounding a lot more like himself than Montserrat (and Olivia) expected. He was definitely irritated enough to be himself.

Montserrat grinned widely at his response. She absolutely loved seeing him act like he usually would — it meant he was getting better! She reached for his hand, immediately gripping it. "I'm sorry I wasn't here when you woke up. I-I should've been, I know, but…"

Rafael watched Montserrat in a more dazed manner again — his mind went in and out with all the meds he was on.

This, Olivia presumed and since Montserrat seemed too upset with herself to notice, Olivia decided to cut in and help them both out. "Now, Montserrat, I think it's okay," she started slowly, watching Montserrat lower her head out of utter guilt, "You had to go home and rest too." Olivia looked at Rafael who was still trying to make sense of Montserrat's long ramble. "She was here all of last night and Carisi and Amaro and sent her home to sleep and eat."

"Well — why are you apologizing then?" Rafael glanced at Montserrat, eyebrows knitting together with confusion. "It's not like I noticed, right? I was in surgery. At least that's what my mother told me?"

"Is that all she told you?" Montserrat asked rather curiously and slightly worried. She grabbed a chair and sat down beside the bed.

"She said a lot of things but honestly, I tuned her out," Rafael drew in a breath, "The mess might be a blessing in disguise, you know."

"Ha…" Montserrat smiled lightly. That sounded a lot more like him. It truly relieved some of her anxiety. "Still, I'm really sorry. I did want to be here but I…I sort of overslept and…"

"I promise you that I am okay with that," Rafael said, smiling for the first time. "I don't want you forgetting about yourself because of me."

"I'm good, I promise," Montserrat assured, nodding her head fast. She brought their interlocked hands to her mouth, kissing his hand. "I just want you to be okay now. I've been a little crazy."

"A little?" Rafael's smile widened.

"Shut up," Montserrat said hushedly, letting out a small chuckle. She missed this so much. All the nerves were washing out as a familiar warmth flooded her insides.

At the same time, Olivia's phone started buzzing. "I'll be back," she told the two before taking the call.

Montserrat scooted her chair closer to the bed. She held onto Rafael's hand, still keeping her smile. This is all she wanted. Rafael was awake, seemingly recuperating and already taking jabs at her. In all her thoughts, she missed Rafael studying her. He noticed something he truly wished he hadn't. It led to his question.

"How are you?"

Montserrat blinked at first, puzzled with the question. "What — me?" She laughed. "Môj drahý, I'm fine. I'm absolutely fine."

"I'm on some strong medication but I assume you just spoke Slovak but even then…I don't buy it," Rafael said, shaking his head. "You went crazy over me."

"You were shot," Montserrat said, still frazzled having to say that. "What did you think I would do? Happily pass the night with your scotch?"

"Did you save me some, by the way?"

"Rafael," Montserrat warned him not to play jokes right now. "You were shot. It's not funny."

"Oh, I'm not laughing at that," agreed Rafael, "But I am trying to lighten the mood here. I don't want you to worry about me."

"Not right now," Montserrat shook her head, "Don't ask me not to do that when you're here. You have no idea how scared I was when I got the call."

"They called you…" Rafael said, as if realizing something.

"Um, yeah…" Montserrat cleared her throat, "Why did the hospital call me first? Your mother, uh, she was pretty pretty confused about that too."

"Yeah…" Rafael nodded, "Uh…I was going to tell you sometime…definitely not here but…"

"I don't think I've ever heard you ramble so uselessly…" Montserrat laughed almost immediately after saying that.

Rafael deadpanned her for a straight minute while she laughed. "I think I deserve to be cut a little slack, right?"

Montserrat nodded as she did her best to sober from her laugh. "Of course, dear."

It was too late as Rafael was already properly annoyed. "You're my emergency contact," he said in a huff.

Montserrat gasped lightly then, eyebrows raising with pleasant shock. "Am I really?"

"Yes, but you're making me regret it—"

"No, no, I promise I'm good! That's nice to hear, I…" Montserrat could feel the familiar spread of butterflies in her stomach. "When did you…when did you decide to do that?"

"I don't know, a bit back? Is that — are you okay with that?"

"Of course! Yes!" Montserrat was a smiling mess, a deep difference from the past day. She leaned over, carefully, and pressed a kiss on Rafael's lips. "Thank you for that trust in me." There was something else she wanted to desperately say to him but she felt the timing was off and perhaps even imprudent on her part.

Even if Rafael said nothing of it, Montserrat still noticed the subtle scrunch of his nose and the twitch of his mouth every now and then from the pain he obviously felt. He just didn't want to tell her about it — it wasn't shocking for her. He barely got used to the idea of asking her for help in far less serious situations so this situation would require a lot more effort from his side and she wanted to make it as easy as possible for him.

"Do you need anything?" She asked him, "I don't know, like a drink or something? And by that I mean water, of course."

"Damn, and I was just about to ask you for some scotch…"

"I would smack you right now if you weren't hurt!" Montserrat sighed and shook her head. "So listen, I really hate asking you this right now but I need to help so…about that night…"

Rafael already started turning his head away from her. He knew exactly what was coming.

"Do you remember what happened?" Montserrat wanted to be as cautious as possible for his sake. It was physically painful enough and now he would have to deal with any mental trauma he suffered from that evening.

"...a little," he did answer albeit in a low mutter.

"Okay, um, well there is that cashier — Clara?"

At the mention of the young woman, Rafael immediately looked back at Montserrat. "Is she okay!?" He truly didn't remember much after hearing the sound of the gun firing. He was in and out of consciousness but he did have slight memories of the young woman terrified in the shop.

"Yes, she is," Montserrat nodded, smiling lightly. "Did you know she's a med student? I was told she helped keep you stable while the ambulance got to you guys. She called 911. I absolutely love her."

It was Rafael's turn to smile. "Should I be worried?"

Montserrat let out a weary sigh but her broad smile defeated any attempt to sound annoyed. "Shut up."

"I want to tell her thank you," Rafael said a moment later. "She was so scared. I may have yelled at her."

"Lots of people react differently in situations like those. It's a flight or fight thing — you chose fight, she chose flight. All involuntary of course. But please, don't ever choose to 'fight' with a robber."

"Oh, but you can?" Rafael countered on the spot. His smirk didn't help. "You carry — you do that for a living. The way you feel right now is what I always feel about you..."

"I know, I know," sighed Montserrat. This was a conversation she didn't like having because Rafael always had the right. His concerns were right, his points made sense.

Rafael gripped Montserrat's hand as much as he could, which wasn't very much if Montserrat was honest with him. She wouldn't tell him. "I'm not arguing, I'm just telling you this is something we can't control," he told her. "I'm sorry I worried you. I didn't…I didn't see the guy getting up…"

"So you do remember some things, then?"

"Yes…but it's still mostly fuzzy…" If there was one thing Rafael didn't want to do right now, it was having to lie to Montserrat. His gaze lowered to their interlocked hands, which fueled his reasons all over again. "I don't know what they put in my body but I couldn't even tell you my birthday right now."

Montserrat smiled sweetly at him. "I'll make a full list about you when you get home. We can go over it together." She scooted her chair even closer to the bed. "Because when you get out of here, you have two choices about what's going to happen."

"Oh, do I?" Rafael blinked, bemused with the revelation.

Montserrat nodded. "Yup. You have a bullet wound and you need to take care of it. You won't be able to move around so easily — you won't be working," she said the last part as a full on threat in case he had the idea of even discussing the matter. "So, when you get out of here, you can either come home with me where I can help you out."

"Not happening," Rafael said on the spot. "You live with Kara and by extension Carisi. Haven't I been through enough already?"

Montserrat deadpanned him for a short minute. She was honestly expecting a response like that. "Then your other option — and your only other one — is that I come stay with you at your place for a while."

"You'd be willing to do that?"

"Yes, of course. I want to help you and I can't do that if I'm at my own place."

"Montserrat, that's sweet of you and I appreciate it but I don't need help —"

"Yes, you do," Montserrat nodded. This was also something else she anticipated and was well prepared to handle. "Raf, you can't live by yourself right now. Until you can go up and down the stairs on your own, I will be staying with you."

"It's not that the idea of having you around isn't pleasant — because it is — but I don't need you giving up your time just to take care of me." Even as he said it out loud, Rafael thought it was ridiculous. "I can manage on my own. I always do."

"Tough luck because it's not just about you anymore," Montserrat countered with a wry smile, "To your misfortune, and mine, I like you very much. With all your sarcasm and hard attitude, but I like you."

Rafael rolled his eyes at Montserrat. It was, of course, nice to hear something like that but it still didn't take away the feeling of impotence either. There were many things out of his control and Rafael was not used to it.

"Montse—"

"Let me do this, please," Montserrat insisted earnestly. "You're right. I was dead worried about you and, yeah, I want to be close to you for the next couple days because of it. I promise I'll try not to bombard you, okay?" She squeezed his hand in hers. "Please?"

This was a battle he had already lost and Rafael knew it. For all he knew, half her things were already in his apartment. That's not the worst thing that could happen. No, no it absolutely wasn't. Rafael sighed. What he would have given for this conversation to be part of a much better situation than the one they were in right now.

"You can go back home anytime, alright?" He said, instantly earning a beam from Montserrat. "You don't have to stay more than you want and you definitely don't have to do anything for me."

"I don't understand how you graduated from Harvard. You're seriously so stupid," Montserrat said quite honestly, which prompted a hard deadpan from Rafael in return. Montserrat let out a laugh in the next second. "But I want you just the way you are! I missed it all!" She leaned over to give him another kiss. "I missed you," she whispered afterwards. "I know it's insane to say that when we saw each other — what, yesterday? — but I really did miss you so much."

Even while saying it, she still sounded so afraid like he would fall under again. Rafael felt so guilty even while knowing this was way out of his control.

"I'm okay, I'm okay," he insisted for her sake. He wished he could get up from the stupid bed and show her — ease her fear and worries. "I don't want you worrying anymore, okay? Calmada."

"I cannot be calm when you're in this situation," Montserrat promptly huffed. "You went ballistic when I had a scratch on my back! I have every right not to be calm about this. Who did this to you? Do you remember anything about the guy?"

Rafael's mind was slow with all the medication, so coming up with a good excuse was even harder than usual. Luckily for him, Olivia returned at that moment.

"Sorry, that was Rollins," the Sergeant said, "She and Fin are going through some possible witnesses." She approached the foot of the bed slowly, both hands in front of her. "Do you think you can give your statement right now?"

Rafael shifted, and in doing so felt a jab of pain on his side.

"Or we could wait…" Olivia said, mistaking his shift for uneasiness.

"I'm good," he said immediately. He glanced at Montserrat, and a moment later he was asking her: "Maybe I do need something after all."

Montserrat nodded. "Anything," she encouraged, "What do you need?"

"A damn glass of water," he said, "They pump meds all night and day and I don't get to eat anything. I'm so thirsty."

"I'll go see what I can do," Montserrat smiled slyly, "Flash my badge and all."

Rafael smiled at her. He knew very well that she would. "Thank you."

"Of course." Montserrat gave his hand a pat then stood up, turning to Olivia. "Keep an eye on him?"

"Oh yeah," Olivia pressed a finger to her cheek then pointed at Rafael.

Montserrat still left with some reluctance, especially when Olivia mentioned that Lucia was asking for her.

"My mother's still here?" Rafael asked, eyebrows raised.

Olivia nodded. "Oh yeah, she's made it clear she's not stepping away for a while."

"She should go home, like you all. I don't need babysitters," Rafael said, shaking his head.

"Oh no, you're not paying Montserrat with that coin when she's had to deal with your mother."

At Olivia's words, Rafael turned his head slightly. "What do you mean by that? Has she been giving Montserrat a hard time?" He wouldn't put it behind his mother given the situation.

Olivia reluctantly nodded. "Yeah. Novak made the call to inform your mother about the situation earlier in the morning. She didn't want Lucia going through a sleepless night like her, much less your grandmother. Lucia didn't like that."

"Is she kidding?" Rafael snapped, not at Olivia but at the situation. "She just told me she hasn't told my grandmother anything about this." He loved his mother, he did, but sometimes she could be a…

"Montserrat didn't tell you?" Olivia assumed with Rafael's reaction. "She probably didn't want to add to your stress."

"Of course," groaned Rafael, although he soon stopped when he discovered it hurt him. "I'll have a word with my mother."

"Sorry," Olivia said guiltily, "I didn't mean to…you know…"

"No, I'm glad you did," said Rafael sharply, "Because Montserrat wouldn't tell me." Nobody would make her life harder than it had to be, not if he could help it. "Don't even tell her that I know."

"Understood," nodded Olivia. "So, about the case…"

"I need you to do something for me," Rafael said out of the blue, startling Olivia.

"Uh, yeah, of course…" Olivia nodded slowly, "What-what do you need?"

Before answering, Rafael's gaze flickered to the door. Montserrat would be away for a while, hopefully. "I need you to close this case."

"Excuse me?" Olivia tilted her head, presuming she heard wrong.

"You heard me," Rafael said, meeting her gaze. "I want the case closed. Cold case, if it must be."

"I don't — I don't understand…" Olivia rubbed her temple, "You want us to…"

"Close the case, yes," Rafael nodded. 'That's exactly what I want you to do. It's my case, and that's what I'm asking for."

"Why?" Olivia never thought she would have to have this kind of conversation with him. If there's anyone who always said what he wanted, it was Rafael. This made no sense. "Are you still processing what happened? Do you need —"

"I already processed it and this is what I need to happen," Rafael said, sounding very sure of himself. "I know what happens next and I'm not doing that."

"Because of a trial? Rafael, you know that's the natural order of thi—"

"I know," Rafael cut Olivia, his sense of impatience growing. "Believe me, Liv, I know what happens next. I know that you will eventually catch this guy and it will go to trial. I know that their defense attorney will start playing tricks and turn things around for their benefit."

"So you're afraid?" Olivia guessed. "That's also normal…"

"I'm not afraid," Rafael clarified, "I would gladly go along with every part of the process but this isn't about me. It was never about me."

Olivia was utterly lost. She rubbed her forehead relentlessly, leaving faint red marks on her skin. "You're going to have to explain this a little better because I'm not understanding. You don't want us to proceed with the case, you don't want a trial, but you're not scared?"

"That's exactly what I'm saying," Rafael confirmed, "And you, as my friend and more importantly the Sergeant here, need to help me."

"Why? Why do you want me to do that!?"

"Because that man worked for someone I get the feeling has been watching us for a while now."

Olivia presumed that the struggle she saw in Rafael was for himself. His hands balled into fists on either side of him. His lips pursed together enough to scrunch his nose automatically. But once again, Olivia was wrong because as Rafael had said earlier, this wasn't about him.

"He's been watching Montserrat," he spat darkly. The idea sent him into a frenzy and the only thing stopping its full fledged form was the aching throb he felt on the side of his stomach.

Olivia looked at Rafael both curiously and alarmed. "Why…why would you think that?"

"Because that man told me," Rafael replied, giving the impression that he remembered exactly what happened last night.

Olivia raised an eyebrow at him. "What do you mean?"

"You and I are the only ones who know what happened to Montserrat before she transferred here, so this should be easy to understand," Rafael said, only taking a moment because he abhorred what he had to say next. "That man who hurt her — he's watching her. I don't know how, I don't know when, but he's still got eyes on her."

Olivia was keenly aware of the rising noise from the machine beside the bed. One of them was connected to Rafael's finger — a blood pressure measure. "I think you need to—"

"It makes sense now, what Little Tino told Montserrat when we visited him in jail. He told Montserrat that there was a rule in place…"

The beeps got slightly louder.

"Raf—"

"Nobody lays a finger on the redhead," Rafael repeated the words he now hated himself for. He completely missed them at that moment. A deep scowl marked his face. "He has rules, Olivia, about her, about Montserrat — in his eyes, she belongs to him. I can't — he's just—"

"Rafael!" Olivia snapped to get his attention. She moved to his bedside, urgently motioning him to calm down.

"Liv, we can't let him keep watching her," he told her, finally sounding what he truly was: frightened. He was scared, but not for him. "We can't let this keep going. He's—"

Olivia nodded and once again motioned him to calm down. "You need to take it easy. You have stitches. They can burst," she reminded him. She grabbed Montserrat's chair to sit down. "Okay, you're going to have to walk me through this so that we're on the same page about what happened. Only then we can decide how to proceed from here."

"Fine, whatever, but you can't tell Montserrat anything about this."

"I can't promise that but we can work together to come up with the best solution," Olivia said.

It wasn't good enough for Rafael. He needed to hear it out loud…but he knew he was asking the impossible from Olivia. He'd been on that side plenty of times. It was hypocritical of him to be asking the same thing he denied so many times before.

Yes, he was being hypocritical.

Yes, he was being unreasonable.

But he just didn't care.

He didn't care about anything, not even the frikin stitches throbbing on his side right now. The only thing he cared about was currently outside, getting something he asked her for. She was all he cared about. So damn everything else.

[incorrectbensler]

Olivia: What are you doing? You could have been killed. You can’t just follow me into fire!

Elliot: You don’t want me to follow you into fire, then don’t run into fire!

[mx-pastelwriting]

Requests Starting April

I was originally planning on opening my requests for February, but finals got me fucked, so I'm going to open them in April! I hope to see you there. I will still try to write until then! I hope you're doing well!!

Masterlist

[pigeon--lord]

L&W SVU

Been rewatching Law and Order SVU keeping it playing in the background while simultaneously doing homework

And so I am on season 11 episode 5, and I just love how Dr. Huang was absolutely done with the perp in court (~33:26)

Like usually he is all about following the rules (except that one episode, but then he still followed the rules by turning himself in so eh) and keeping quiet to observe others. 

IDK, maybe I am just tired, but the way he just says at the perp trying to tell everyone in court how being a pedo is okay and  how it should be normal to touch children and Huang just sits there with the most I-am-so-done-face and just blurts out: 

“Because its rape, that’s why.” 

My man was really done with all the nonsense perp of the week was spewing, the audacity XD

That got a chuckle out of me....  

[auroracalisto]

aurora's 2022 fic pick

hello, and welcome to my first post of the new year—my 2022 fic pick! i will be compiling some of the fics i read and loved from this past year below!! to make it harder on myself, i've resorted to choosing only three for each month. i guarantee i've read hundreds more.

TOTAL FICS: 36

included fandoms: marvel, american horror story, the last kingdom, the 100, the witcher, peaky blinders, law and order: svu, the umbrella academy, gotham, stranger things, the princess bride, top gun, hetalia, timewasters, original work

DISCLAIMER: SOME OF THESE FICS MAY CONSIST OF NSFW. please be aware before clicking on them. also, please read responsibly—i have not included all triggers to the fics, only major ones, so please be sure to check those before you read the fics.

there is one month (october) in which i only reblogged two fics, and i checked my ao3 history as well. i didn't read a single fic on ao3 that month. to try and make up for it, i have posted an extra for the month of december.

JANUARY

words left unspoken by adorin on ao3 - doc ock x reader - fluff and angst, character death, gn!reader - this fic was *chefs kiss* no joke i love it and i recently went back to re-read it. it gets better every time. Heartbeat by HanakoSpiritoftheToliet on ao3 - matt murdock x reader - pregnant!reader, fluff - this was so sweet. i am a sucker for fluff. Terrible Two's by writeyouin on ao3 - charles xavier x reader - parent!reader, fluff - like i said. a sucker for fluff. i can't help it.

FEBRUARY

Soulmark by @dyns33 - matt murdock x reader - a little bit of angst, a little bit of fluff; happy ending - i remember reading this for the first time and absolutely crying when i read the ending. it was SO good. Lost In the Shadows by @7-wonders - vampire!michael langdon x fem!reader - part of a collection of fics, kind of spicy towards the end, but nothing serious - the series is seriously so good. i am 100% prepared to re-read it. Chivalry's Death by e_n_silvermane on ao3 - 2p!prussia x reader - hetalia, gore, mute!character - LISTEN. EVEN IF YOU DON'T LIKE HETALIA. this is SUCH a good fic. literally it is so good. there's so much depth to the story itself, and i absolutely love every part of it. like... the description, the guilt the characters feel—it's literally a piece of art and i will stand by that until the day i die.

MARCH

For a moment by @disasterofastory - finan x fem!reader - hurt/comfort, gore - LOVE. love this fic. all her fics are so good. almost like praying by @imaginearyparties - steve rogers x bucky barnes - gore, gay religious angst - i fell in love with this fic with the first paragraph. i knew i was in for a magnificent piece, and ilana never fails to provide. There are monsters and there are men by silverwolf7850 on ao3 - vampire!matt murdock x reader x werewolf!frank castle - fluff and angst, canon-typical violence, supernatural themes - this fic FUELED my love for both matt and frank. i literally loved every second of it and i wish there was more to it.

APRIL

Rescuing You by @violetrainbow412-blog - vampire!eddie munson x fem!reader - angst, kind of villain!eddie - bro this was IT. this was the fic that fueled my love for vampire eddie, and i've never been the same since. unnamed by @000ficlets otto x reader - fluff - this fic is literally only five paragraphs long but i loved it so much. like,,, you know how you just read something about you can just feel the love coming from it? yeah. this fic. beautiful. against all odds by @twistnet dmitri antonov x fem!reader - angst, fluff, possible tw due to violence - this was one of the first dmitri fics i read after becoming attached to the character... brb gonna re-read it AGAIN.

MAY

A Surprise Guest by JaskiersWolf on ao3 modern!jaskier x reader - first meetings, alcohol - bro. BRO. when i say this fic is so good, i absolutely love it. it's so soft and makes me feel all warm on the inside. 6 Meters Under and Back Part 1 by @onesaltyhunter - vampire!sihtric x fem!reader fluff? bloody vampire stuff - oh my gosh when i found this, i jumped on the opportunity to read it. i love vampires, and i LOVE sihtric. is there a part 3? i don't know if there's a part 3. It's good to see you! by @disasterofastory alfie solomons x reader - technically first meetings, anxious reader, being followed - disasterofastory always has amazing fics and this one,,, idk there's just something about it that i love to read. it's totally alfie and it's written well!!

JUNE

Scarrification by BruisesAndBuzzaxes on ao3 victor zsasz x fem!reader - fluff, meeting family, character backstory - this is a long fic, but it's *oh* so good. like it's literally worth every last word. i've read it a few times through already. i might go back again and read it one more time. Where Our Pieces Fall in Place by anotherwinchesterfangirl on ao3 - finan x fem!reader x sihtric NSFW, time travel, polyamory - so good. SO GOOD. i love time travel tropes and this one hits the spot, every time i read it. Imagine being chosen to join Wonkru in the bunker before Praimfaya [...] by @fanficimagery roan x reader, past!echo x reader - angst to fluff, typical canonical violence - ohhhh my gosh in a world of so little roan x reader fics, this one is a diamond in the rough. it's so good.

JULY

Peanut Butter Cookies by @eddie-van-munson eddie munson x reader - slight angst with a happy ending, jealousy, allergies - jealousy fics are so good and this one was just,,, too good. i love eddie. i love domestic eddie. please don't cry by @sickoherd john murphy x reader - comfort fic - short comfort fic with john murphy <33 it was sweet and simple and so good with just a few words. Selfish Jerk by @imamotherfuckingstar-lord jim hopper x reader - fluff, a little angst, taking place during season 2 - i looove hopper. this was the first fic i read in july that was jim hopper, and it definitely wasn't the last.

AUGUST

IF I DIE YOUNG by @imgoingtofreakoutnow steve harrington - finale-based fic; major character death. lots of angst. - this fic is so good. i remember reading it for the first time and i actually cried. multiple times. i loved getting to read how steve may have felt in the days after the season 4 finale. annie's writing is so good regardless. Darling by @no-mercy-bby ralph timewasters x reader - short fluff fic - one of the first fics i read of ralph and i absolutely fell in love with him. bby is an amazing writer and they've definitely captured my attention on more than one occasion. want me to kill him for you? by @froggywritesstuff diego hargreeves x gn!reader - short fluff fic - diego is amazing and the characterization in this fic is just as incredible.

SEPTEMBER

That Guy by YouGotThatWrite on ao3 rafael barba x gn!reader - fluff, meet-cute over coffee - my mom and step-dad watched the entirety of law and order: svu and i just so happened to watch most of the episodes with rafael in them. i already loved him. and then i read this fic. it's so good. The Eddie Munson Collection by Edtease on ao3 eddie munson x reader - blurb collection; somewhat nsfw - these were so good and i loved getting to read about a somewhat domestic eddie munson. some of them are a little on the nsfw side, so please be aware before reading. Imagine finding out that Rafael sometimes worries about your age difference by @svubloods rafael barba x reader - age difference, established relationships - okay so i'm not even gonna lie i love fics that take valid concerns and makes the characters live through it. that being said, i also love rafael. there's no questioning as to why i loved this fic.

OCTOBER

City Nights by @thebirdybrigade allen f. jones x gn!reader - possible tw for attempted s/a, violence, etc. slight angst to a bit on the fluffier side?? - oh boy the first hetalia fic i've included on this list. i genuinely loved this fic. it was written well, and i love to re-read this. the ending kills me, every time. goodnight, my love by eliwashere on ao3 original character/reader - major NSFW warning, vampires, original character, pwp - i don't even remember how i found this fic. i think i clicked on the vampire tag on ao3 and came across this. it's so good?? like i fell in love with the plot of the story, and then the smut itself was a bonus. AND THEN the author included a sketch of the character in the next chapter, and boom, i fell in love, AGAIN. i literally do not have another fic for this month. i was off of social media well until the middle of the month. i will include an extra one on december because i know i have enough for that month.

NOVEMBER

THOSE WHO ARE LEFT BEHIND by @imgoingtofreakoutnow steve harrington x gn!reader - platonic, mentions of death and mourning - the second of annie's fics i've listed. it's sad, but it's so good. it's the budding of a relationship and i absolutely adore every bit of it. attention by @imaginearyparties namor x reader - okay but let's talk about the fact that ilana ALWAYS has good fics, and this one just proves it?? it's so good. i hadn't even watched the new black panther yet and i had already fallen in love with namor because of how he was written in this fic. are you thanking me or your god? by @lazypeachsoul uhtred ragnarsson x fem!reader - meeting, budding relationship - uhtred is a babe and the way lazypeachsoul writes him is magnificent. i love him and this fic so much.

DECEMBER

Nobody But Me by @ohthatstragic tom "iceman" kazansky x fem!reader - jealousy, established relationship - THIS was the first iceman fic i read after watching top gun maverick for the first time and i fell in love with him. not to mention the writer did well with characterization. gonna come back to this fic at some point and re-read. Concussed by @topgun-imagines mickey "fanboy" garcia x fem!reader - slight angst, injury - fanboy is adorable and this fic (other than the injury he sustains) is so cute. i loved reading it. Dating Westley Would Include... by @bowieandqueen11 the princess bride westley x reader - dating headcanons - i need more princess bride fanfics. i've talked to a few mutuals about it before and i might just do it. this fic is so good, though. i'm so glad it's out there. extra since i only had two for october: Strong people aren't born they're built by meowmeowpumpkin on ao3 jake "hangman" seresin x fem!reader - angst, a bit of violence, major tw for some things; please be sure to read the author's warnings before you read. - bobbbb in this fic. i love it. and the 180 jake does when he realizes that something isn't right with his wife. it was good.

and a reminder for everyone reading:

[saturncodedstarlette]

“You’re sorry for leaving?”

“Or are you sorry for not giving me the courtesy of telling me?”

“Both.”

“I think I thought if I talked to you about how—”

“You walked away.”

“Cause that’s what you did, (c/n).”

“. . . . .”

“(c/n)”

“You were the most. . . single most important person in my life.”

“(y/n)—”

“And you just. . . disappeared.”

“I know.”

“I was afraid. . .”

“…if I heard your voice, I wouldn’t been able to leave.”

[why-do-i-like-the-bad-guys]

So I’m writing a fanfic with these shows in them(not in this order).

It’s called Criminal Minds: Danika. On Wattpad and I’ve already published 200 chapters and am starting on the next book.

Here are the shows I have in the story so far:

Criminal Minds

Law and Order SVU

Supernatural

NCIS

Scandal

Bones

Teen Wolf

The Originals

The Morning Show

How to get away with murder

Percy Jackson (books) (working on a spin off story)

X-Files

Greys Anatomy

House MD

The Mentalist

Ransom

Black Sails (after the show)( working on a spin off story)

Mad Men (after the show) (working on a spin off story)

Peaky Blinders (plan on adding) (working on a spin off)

Chicago Fire (plan on adding)

Chicago PD (plan on adding)

Chicago Med (plan on adding)

Vikings (plan on adding) (working on a spin off)

Hannibal (thinking of adding)

So, now you can see why I might need some help with the upcoming parts of my book and their plotline order lol. Because I want to continue some of the stories but am having a hard time trying to sort it out into a timeline that works with one another really well.

[fictionaldemon]

Masterlist

Created: 1/14/2024 Updated: 1/14/2024

Attack on Titan Coming Soon

Game of Thrones Stark of Silence - Tyrion Lannister x OC Haikyuu!! Love You & You & You - Daichi Sawamura x Koshi Sugawara x Asahi Azumane x OC Law & Order: SVU Defending the Husbando - Rafael Barba x reader My Hero Academia Into the Unknown Masterlist - Katsuki Bakugo x OC

[inspectorspinda]

[nophunleague]

stare decisis: chapter two - amarum

amarum: latin for bitter

wc: 1,033

rafael barba x original female character

“Carmen, can you get me the witness statements for-” Quinn starts to ask as she rushes into her office with cup of iced coffee in hand. 

“The photographer case? What we have of the DD-5s from the detectives are on your desk. Mr. Barba is at the precinct now,” she explains. 

“Remind me to thank him for the invite,” she huffs rhetorically as she enters her office. She shuts the door behind her and throws her work bag on the arm chair that sits right inside the door. Two months she’s been in Manhattan and she’s still getting the cold shoulder from the squad and her supposed co-counsel. She dials his cell from her office phone while she glances over the reports from the detectives. He picks up a few rings in. 

“Barba.”

“You’re not seriously thinking about filing charges are you?” she asks and can almost hear his eyes rolling through the phone. Her right hand rests on the desk with a pink gel pen in it on a blank legal pad, willing and ready to take notes.

“I thought you would think better of me,” he smirks and mouths her name to Olivia. 

“I don’t and that’s how I know you’re still helping the squad cook up some convoluted plan to get this guy,” the smirk is wiped right off his face, it was like she had read his mind. 

“They either do it with legal counsel observing or the start violating constitutional rights with reckless disregard,” he lowers his voice as he walks into the breakroom of the precinct.

“Or you’re there and they violate someone’s rights and then you’re also named in the lawsuit. I don’t think the city’s malpractice insurance covers rights violations,” she huffs.

“I appreciate your concern but I’m doing this,” he grunts and hangs up the phone. She sighs angrily. She’s been co-counsel to Barba for three months and they’ve been at each other’s throats constantly. This time she’s actually looking out for him and he’s continuing to brush her off. 

She works the rest of the day quietly, Barba is in and out of his office, leaving her out of the game all day. 

***

Quinn’s boring and quiet day came to an end later that night while she sat on her couch watching trashy reality television. At a pivotal point in the episode her phone rings next to her, she picks it up with her eyes still glued to the TV. 

“Mac, you won’t believe what happened today,” she says without a second thought. As she’s about to continue speaking she’s interrupted by an unexpected voice.

“Miss Brady, it’s Sonny Carisi. Sorry to call you so late,” she sits up straighter from her slouched couch position. 

“Oh Carisi, what’s up? Barba off playing poker with the Governor?”

“Actually ma’am, he doesn’t know I’m calling you. But I think you should come down to the precinct. Fin arrested the perp tonight while UC.”

“He did what?” she all but shouts into the phone, she can feel Carisi’s painful cringe through the device. “I’ll be right there,” she seethes as she stands up from her spot on the couch. 

The ride to the precinct is short and grueling. Only because Quinn attempts avoids any human interaction as a way to spare them from her anger. Steam is essentially blowing out of her ears as she enters the squad room and sets her sights on her co counsel. Her gaze almost as fiery as the color of her hair. Olivia Benson watches as he almost shrinks into the waist code he’s wearing. 

“Are you fucking serious?” she seethes in front of the whole squad, not bothering to excuse herself and Rafael from the group. 

“What are you doing here?” he asks, looking her casually clothed self up and down. She’s donned in loose fitting blue jeans and an oversized white button up; like she just walked off the set of a nineties movie. 

“I just had a feeling you were going to let them do something unbelievably stupid. And look, I was right,” Sonny takes note of her lack of disclosure as the the actual reason she showed up, he likes to think it was to spare him rather than to make her look good. “I told you to specifically not to do this and here we are.”

“No offense counselor, but you’re not his boss, nor are you ours,” Olivia speaks up removing her reading glasses to make eye contact.

“You’re right, but when we’re all named in the lawsuit for constitutional rights violations; it has consequences, career consequences,” her eyes narrow at every team member. Barba’s smirk is stamped on his face before he even speaks.

“Sounds like you have experience counselor.”

“I was a federal attorney after 9/11, yeah I’ve heard about constitutional rights violations,” she says straight faced. “What do you plan on doing now that you’ve arrested a man with no evidence of wrongdoing?”

“Do what we do best: investigate,” Amaro shrugs his shoulders. She rolls her eyes at him then looks to Barba again.

“We need to talk. Now,” she leads them to the secluded locker room. As soon as the door shuts she’s laying into him again. “How can you not see how bad this is? How did you let them violate him with no evidence? What were you thinking?”

“Okay, I know this is bad, but there’s some compelling information. Fin arrested him in a sterile torture chamber that had been soundproof. The things he said he wanted to do on those message boards are downright awful. And I was thinking that the kids he’ll hurt in the future need to be saved,” he calmly explains while holding her green eyes captive with his. Her breath hitches in her throat before she’s able to blink free. 

“While that is noble of you, it is not legal. And we’re supposed to be co counsel and you left me in the dark. Now we’re both in this mess and the DA is going to be pissed. We can’t keep going on like this, you have to loop me in.” She grunts then removes herself from the room with a huff.