#People drink a lot when she starts speak with them about their problems

[hannya-writes]

When they call you their wife (Genshin Impact Version)

Fandom: Genshin Impact Pairing: Kaeya x reader, Diluc x Reader, Zhongli x Reader, Xiao x Reader Other characters: ehh, I think I mentiones Traveler in Zhongli's part, Diluc is also mentioned in Kaeya's part Category: Romance, scenarios Warnings: There's a little bit of violence in Xiao's part but it's not detailed. I think that's it! Author's note: It's ten days since the beggining of the year, happy new year people! Sorry about the delay, I'm terrible with time so... yeah there's that better late than sorry! Hope you enjoy~

Kaeya

“And this beautiful lady is my dear wife”

This man lives to see people's reactions to what he does and says. So he bets to himself what your reaction will be to every of his crazy ideas, so maybe he teases you a lot and flirts with you shamelessly.

He went to Sumeru to represent Jean since she was very occupied. You, on your part,were assigned to protect him since he was an important diplomat of Mondstadt.

You tried to be as professional as possible but it was hard when Kaeya found every opportunity to flirt with you.

Kaeya is a gentleman around you, treating you like his date rather than his guard.

So he makes you relax, he makes you laugh with his comments. When he hears you were assigned because of your dexterity with the sword he gets interested in your story.

Where did you learn to fight? When did you start? Who was your master? You went to the akademya? You were a Mat, Matra? 

Kaeya gets really invested so you decide to answer his questions only if he answers them too.

And Kaeya is happy to reveal all of his stories and secrets to know you because you are not like most people, you don't get frightened when he says he once woke up a ruin guardian to win a fight.

“It a valid gamble” you say while nodding and Kaeya’s eyes bright like he just heard the most beautiful music of all Teyvat.

When Kaeya finally has to go back to Mondstadt you are informed that you will have the mission to bring him back to the capital of Wind safe and sound.

It was a long and tiring trip, you had to defend yourself and him more than once and Kaeya was more than happy to fight by your side.

There was only one problem in the last part of your journey: a Samachurl Froze your ankle and while you were able to kill it the frostbite was a problem.

Kaeya, ever the gentleman carried you to a safe place, the house of his childhood: Dawn’s Winery

He knocked at the door and was faced with a surprised Adeline, who hurried to get everything needed to help you.

Maybe an hour later Kaeya’s brother appeared and explained your situation, only that he presented you as his wife.

Diluc was taken aback when Kaeya presented you as his wife. He looked at his brother with a specially deep frown, making Kaeya say: “It was love at first drink”

There are three options: one were Diluc apologizes…

 “My apologize, it seems my brother hurt his head and is speaking nonsense”

Another option is if you are someone who is honest and you react nervously, denying his statement, Kaeya will laugh and tells you, in a joking tone, that you don't have to get shy, this is his brother!

The last option is if you act all composed, there's a chance that Diluc will smile and sarcastically play along, as you two chat, ignoring Kaeya who will definitely get touchy at the lack of attention.

If you laugh and play along with him, he will most definitely hug you by the waist and start calling you his wife for every goddamn reason he can think of.

“My wife would like a glass of water” “I can't give that to my wife” “Diluc, she is my wife be polite” Now Kaeya can't stop calling you his wife.

Diluc

“Carefull now, Mr.client, That's my wife you are talking about”

Diluc won't call you his wife if it's not true, so you are married to the Dark knight hero, the thing is: Almost no one knows about you two because Diluc doesn't want to put you in danger.

You two met at the Angel's Share. You were a knight of favonius, he was bartending.

You had gone there to celebrate someone's birthday, only that unlike the rest you didn't ask for an alcoholic beverage, you asked for apple cider.

While everyone got plastered you chatted the night away with Diluc.

Let me tell you, Diluc was happy to talk to someone who wasn't complaining about his life nor was drunk. It was one of the best nights of his life.

So maybe, when you forgot your vision on the bar to go help one of your friends, he didn't say anything, wanting to have a reason to look for you.

Oh, and he looked for you the next day!

Everyone was shitting their pants when they saw Diluc entering the headquarters. Everyone was wondering what he was doing there, if there was a crisis, if… wait, why was he talking to you?

Diluc gave back your vision and since that moment he found the way to get involved with you.

That being said, he proposed after two years of knowing you and the wedding was at the Dawn Winery and was very, very small.

Persons who where at the wedding: Kaeya, Jean, Lisa and Adelinde, besides the nun who officiated the wedding. (I said it was a small wedding!)

I mean, being Mrs. Ragvindir would put you up in the list of people to kidnap in Monstadt, not because of the dark knight hero thing, no, no, no. It's because of the mora.

He only calls you his wife because he has to instill fear in the bones of the man who dared to speak about you

What did the man said? “That Y/n, she has such a pretty ass, have you seen it?... Come on! She looks like such a slut with that skimpy clothes, I would love to spank…”

And Diluc is not going to let anyone talk about his wife, like that in his own bar.

Yes maybe you are a Favonius’ knight and yes it's true your ass is pretty, especially when you use shorts… but no one is allowed to talk about you like that, like you are nothing but an object.

Okay, maybe he can but only when he's alone with you in the middle of some dirty session of love making.

When he say those words, he’s totally saying them to scare the shit out of whoever dared to be disrespectful to you. Because, a menace from him is something to fear, he was the youngest calvary captainof the knights. He was a master swordman.

Diluc knows you can defend yourself, you probably will kick this drunkard ass, but he prefers to instill fear in people than have you getting in trouble with Jean.

Don't get mad at Diluc, he’s a bit overprotective of you because he loves you.

The man suddenly sobers up as soon as his ears registered Diluc words. He looks ashamed and regretful of his choice of words, he offers an apology and leave because it's so damn late!

As soon as Diluc sees you back home, he can't avoid looking at you with adoration only to confess his slip up the moment you two are having dinner.

The only thing you can say is: “It's about time everyone knows”

Zhongli

“Oh, Y/n is my wife, didn't I mentioned it?”

He was 3,000 years old when he met you. You were the prettiest living being he had ever seen. 

A minor Goddess with strong wings that adorned your back. A Goddess enslaved to be a gift to the lord of vortex, send heavily guarded in a caravan that happened to pass near the Guili plains thanks to an accidental detour

You were the goddess of Song and the Dawn, the bringer of peace after a nightmare.

Zhongli could forget even his own name but he would never forget your panicked expression when your eyes landed on him.

He was so damn tall, intimidating and serious that you had thought the Dragon wanted to keep you for himself.

However, Morax had opened the cage and told you in a stern and cold voice that you were free.

You were so afraid that you didn't step out until he got away from you. Then you flew away in the form of a bright and colorful bird.

 You didn't plan to go back to where he was but curiosity got the best of you, so you went back and watched Morax in silence from the distance.

The Adepti tried to scare you away unsure of how to deal with you stalking the prime Adepti. However, you didn't budge. Everyday you appeared in your bird form to sing to Morax and wake him up.

Slowly the adepti accepted your presence, they even started to try and get you to stay a little bit more since Morax started asking about the bird he has been hearing.

Morax one day woke up earlier only to tell you that you could stay for breakfast and since that moment you two started to eat together.

You were grateful to him and looked for forms to let him know, from giving him flowers, act as his messenger to the Yaksha and even sing for him. He had saved you from being a concubine of Osial, there was too much to be grateful.

Between this acts of devotion, Morax started to pay more and more attention to you and even when he didn’t understand his feelings he knew one thing: He wanted to keep you close and keep you safe.

Thousands of years were needed but you two ended up getting married.

Now, in all of this more than 3,000 years of Marriage he has called you Wife, but I really like this time when he forgot to introduce you as his wife because for him is common knowledge. Everyone knows Rex Lapis is married to the goddess of Song and Dawn. Everyone who is important to him knows you.

Those being, the adepti..

But the traveler saw you two eating together one afternoon. And they saw you walking together by the bay while holding hands. Another day he saw you clinging to Zhongli’s arm while he seemed to be explaining something to you.

They assumed you two were dating. They even got to speak to you for a commission, something about a ring made of noctiluose jade.

So Traveler being a little rascal started talking about you with Zhongli and he seemed to be happy to talk about you. 

“When are you gonna ask her to marry you?” Traveler asks mischievously and Zhongli laughs and say the phrase. 

The travelers gets all surprised but then asks how did that happened and Zhongli is proud to explain how he managed to ask for your hand.

Next time traveler meets you, they notice the ring around your finger.

However, they notice thewhole ring is made of Cor lapis.

As you notice their curious gaze you tell him the story about how Rex lapis made Cor lapis only to propose to you.

Which makes sense since Cor lapis literally means “Heart of stone”

Xiao

“Get your hands away from my wife!”

Xiao is not a man of many words, he’s terrible at expressing his feelings to everyone.

And I mean everyone, even with you. 

However, you should know that he will never call you his wife if he isn't married to you.

This is because he once heard Zhongli telling something along the lines of: “Marriage is the most sacred of contracts”

Now listed, you two met because of Zhongli/Morax. You were the first minor Goddess who relinquished your divinity to Morax and was left almost with no power, so Morax asked Xiao to take care of you.

And Xiao, being the obedient Yaksha he is, took care of you during the Archon War, and maybe that’s why you survived to such massacre.

As I have stated before, Xiao is bad with his feelings but it is good that you can basically read his emotions.

Your love story was a very, agonizingly slow burn, however when Xiao understood that you were never going to leave him, that you loved him and there was no way to change that, only then he gave up trying to get away from you… and he asked you to marry him.

For hundreds of years, Xiao called you his wife only when you two were alone. For him it was a term of endearment.

“Wife” oh, he says it with such softness and love, it makes you fall for him again! You don’t even mind that your marriage is practically a secret.

But there’s always a first time for everything. And the first time he called you his wife in public… It was something else. It wasn’t something born from his love and devotion, it was a warning.

For what felt like years he had endured listening to men flirt with you in Wangshu Inn. Every god damn male seemed to have the goal of stealing you from him. There were some female humans trying to catch your attention, but they were more subtle, smarter.

There was a man who pretended to be interested in your life as an adventurer, asking questions all the time.There was another who tried to catch your attention with food. There was a woman who wanted to take pictures of you and always told you, you were perfect. The worst one, was the one who tried to teach you martial arts.

You only accepted out of pure pressure, since he insisted so much. You were already an excellent fighter, only that you used a weapon of your choice.

The worst part was that he always corrected you, pressing his palm in your abdomen or your lower back.

Xiao usually didn’t pay attention since he didn’t felt jealous, he only peaked since you were making that little sound of annoyance you always did. That small “mhhh” 

When he saw that man putting his hands on your hips to “correct” your already perfect posture, he just lost it.

It wasn’t just his anger and frustration, that was his karmic debt taking control. In a second Primordial Jade Winged-Spear was in his hands and he attacked blindly. 

The man let go of you and tried to be a hero, only to be hit and cut by Xiao. Let’s be sincere, if it weren’t for you the “martial art master” would be dead, because Xiao is extremely strong.

Anyway, you fought your dear husband and pinned him to the ground until he calmed down. The “martial art master” ran away half beaten, forgetting about you.

Let’s just say, no one has flirted with you since that day. 

[girlgenius1111]

no one should be alone on christmas

barca femeni x reader

changed from the request slightly because i've read a couple fics where r tries to hide that she's gonna be alone for the holidays, and thought i'd take a slightly different approach, so as not to copy anyone :) but pinky promise there is tons of angst and fluff!

cw; mention of bad relationship with parents... implied homophobia i guess? not really discussed much though. angst, fluff, :)

The look on your teammates face when you told them you didn't have any plans for the holiday were almost comical; every one of them looked completely horrified. Sure, they knew your relationship with your parents was rocky, but they hadn't realized you didn't speak, didn't see them at all. What was almost worse was that you didn't even seem to understand why they were so appalled by you spending Christmas alone.

You knew, as soon as you left the locker room after your declaration and the room erupted into loud conversations, that your teammates would begin scheming.

Your problem was that you didn't really want to celebrate Christmas. Obviously, it was a big deal back home in England, and you'd grown up celebrating it, but those weren't the happiest of memories. For the first years of your life, Christmas had been fun. As you aged, and your parents started fighting, it didn't stay fun. Your parents had gone off the rails when you were a teenager; they were incredibly religious people, and when they felt you slipping away from this, they tightened their grasp, until it was suffocating.

Maybe the holidays wouldn't be so awful if they weren't such a stark reminder of what you no longer had, of the rift between you and your parents. Christmas 2 years ago had been the worst of your life. You'd fought with your parents all day, until a screaming match left you packing your bags. They'd had too much to drink, said things about you it was clear they were always thinking, but never vocalized. When you confirmed their suspicions in a fit of anger, they became more aggravated than you'd ever seen them.

You lived with friends for a while, once being at home became unbearable, until finally you got your first contract. You lived with teammates, then, and managed to avoid all conversations about the holidays. Since the Christmas fight, you'd sworn off the day, preferring to hibernate in your house, and actively try not to think about your parents. You missed who they were, and hated who they'd become, which made for a very confusing breakdown every year.

This was your first year at Barcelona, though, and your new team was not content to let you sit alone as you normally did. Especially not when you were only 19, and especially not when a lot of them had taken to acting like concerned mothers with you.

You didn't want to celebrate though, you couldn't. In the days following your locker room chat, you noticed your teammates being slightly odd around you; they weren't very subtle, and they were clearly planning something. Whether it was a Christmas kidnapping or a team party, you weren't sure. All you knew was that you wanted no part of it.

Telling the entire team this, though, didn't seem like something you wanted to do. So instead, you went to the only people you knew had the power to stop whatever horrifying red and green themed atrocity was being planned.

You weren't used to this, really, needing to talk to your captains about anything serious. You'd decided to pull Alexia aside after practice, and tried to be as normal as possible so as not to worry anyone. It didn't seem to work.

"What's up, y/n?" Alexia asked, once you were alone in the hall.

"Could we talk once everyone's gone? I just... there's something I need to talk to you about." You internally winced at how poorly you'd phrased that. Alexia's previously relaxed face was now one of worry as she scrutinized you.

"Of course. Just me?" she asked, her voice uncharacteristically warm. She'd clearly picked up on the anxiety oozing off your body.

"Um... maybe Mapi too?" you asked. Again, your teammates weren't subtle individuals, Mapi least of all. It had become obvious that she was the instigator of whatever plan was in motion.

"Si, I'll tell her." Alexia stated, before giving you a reassuring smile and leading you into the locker room.

-----

Alexia had directed you to an empty office, shuffling in with Mapi behind you. You sat in one of the chairs facing the desk, as they both perched on the edge of the desk. You felt ridiculously like a kid in trouble at school, as your leg tapped nervously, and the girls both looked down at you. They weren't angry, though, and you weren't in trouble.

"I know you guys are planning to do something with me for Christmas," you blurted, not really sure where to start. Mapi got a sky grin on her face, but Alexia's expression remained unchanged, the unease on your face making her heart clench.

"No, what would give you that idea, pequeña?" Mapi questioned teasingly.

"Please don't. I don't like Christmas, I don't want to celebrate. I know you guys feel bad, but I really, really just prefer doing my own thing." You responded, going with the sentences you'd practiced in your head on the way to practice this morning.

Mapi's face had fallen, and you felt guilty despite knowing that you were just doing what you needed to do.

"Why don't you like Christmas?" Alexia asked, brow furrowed.

"I just don't," you replied, biting tone making Alexia and Mapi exchange looks. You weren't normally so serious, or so defensive. You were staring hard at the ground, as though you wished it would swallow you up.

Mapi extended her foot, poking it against yours softly until you rolled your eyes and looked up at her.

"Why don't you like Christmas?" They weren't letting you out of this one easily. You took a big breath, fixing your gaze back down at your feet, before you spoke.

"My parents were really difficult. Not always, but for a while. I left home on Christmas 2 years ago. I haven't seen them since. It's not a very fun day for me," you explained, working hard to keep your voice from shaking.

Alexia and Mapi were silent, and you chanced a look up at them. Both were deep in thought, frowns etched across their faces.

"It's really not a big deal. I just don't do Christmas, I don't want to do Christmas. So whatever you're plotting, please don't," you said, desperate for them to understand.

"I'm sorry, I'm not trying to be rude," you started, suddenly alarmed that you'd seem ungrateful, but you were interrupted.

"No, don't apologize. Never apologize for telling us when you don't like something we're doing," Alexia said firmly, seeming to know what to say for the first time in minutes. "If you don't want to do Christmas, we don't make you." Mapi nodded her head rapidly in agreement.

"You were supposed to spend Christmas Eve with Marta and Caro, Christmas with me, and then go to Mapi's for a couple days, but we don't have to do any of that," Alexia continued, and you felt a wave of an unknown emotion wash over you.

You'd expected they'd been planning something, but not that they'd had you delegated somewhere every day of the break. It wasn't an overall bad feeling, just one you weren't used to.

"Thank you," you stated quietly, not really sure what else to say.

"The offers stand, though, pequeña. If you change your mind," Mapi insisted. "Also, ... it's possible that I rigged the secret santa and multiple people have you, and there isn't really anything I can do about that. So you'll get your gifts but you can be alone," she continued, biting her lip. She looked worried, as if you would be mad. Alexia looked slightly annoyed that Mapi had rigged the gift exchange, but much too preoccupied with you to yell at her then.

"Mapi," you groaned, allowing a small smile to form on your face, assuring her that you weren't mad. The gifts, you didn't mind. You could pretend they weren't Christmas related, and they'd be a good distraction.

Mapi launched into an animated story of how she managed to rig the exchange, [she'd just ended up giving more people presents to make up for all the people getting you things,]. The tricky part was, apparently, doing it behind Ingrid's back; this, you didn't doubt.

They walked you to your car, sensing that you didn't really want to talk any more about it, but leaving you with unusually tight hugs. You appreciated them a lot, even if they were too overbearing sometimes.

-----

When Mapi told you she'd messed with the Secret Santa, you assumed she meant that 2 people had you. Maybe 3. You were wrong.

First up at your apartment the first day of break, before everyone departed for their respective homes, was Ona. She'd managed to get you your favorite sweets from England, an entire box full. She stayed and chatted with you for a while, insisting that she didn't have anywhere to be until later. She was quite successful at getting your mind off things, and had you laughing with her after a bit. When she left, you made sure to tell her to thank Lucy for helping her with the gift, and she stammered out an agreement, a deep blush coating her cheeks.

Aitana showed up next, her gift amusedly from both her and Keira, as the ginger had helped her pick it out. It was a new washbag, not unlike Alexia's. They must have noticed you eyeing it appreciatively. Aitana also brought a mass amount of Christmas cookies, making you eat three before she left.

Patri and Claudia showed up next, pushing past you into your apartment as soon as you opened the door. They'd gotten you approximately 8 new games for your switch, and insisted on trying all of them with you. It left you wondering who the gift was really for, considering they often came over to play on the switch with you. Regardless, they stayed late into the evening, despite both having to get up early to head home the next morning.

Mapi and Ingrid arrived, bringing chaos with them. More Mapi than Ingrid. The Norwegian had gotten you a set of light blue ceramic mugs that matched your kitchen perfectly. You'd barely had time to admire them before Mapi was taking them out of your hands, and dragging you over to her absurdly large present. It was perfectly wrapped, like Ingrid's had been, and her cheeky smile told you that she wasn't as innocent as she'd like you to believe. You opened the box, finding it weirdly light. The inside was completely empty, and you looked at the girls in confusion. The doorbell rang then, and your confusion only grew, as Mapi had said she'd be the last to stop by.

You opened the door to reveal Alexia, holding a squirming puppy in her arms, with a bow haphazardly placed on it's head. Your jaw dropped. You'd mentioned wanting a dog a few times, but you'd wanted to wait until you settled in more.

"Is that... mine?" you asked, and all 3 girls laughed at your astonishment.

"Si!!" Mapi shouted, so overcome with excitement that she was practically bouncing up and down next to you. Alexia handed you the dog, and you noted that she was smiling wider than you'd ever seen her. Alexia and dogs.

He was a little thing, a mini long haired dachshund, light brown in color. His tail was wagging furiously, and he snuggled up to you right away, licking your face eagerly. You were completely speechless, almost moved to tears.

"Thank you," you said looking around at your teammates. You really didn't know what else to say; they'd gone so above and beyond, so out of their way to make these days slightly easier for you, to make sure you weren't alone, even if you wouldn't let them be there with you.

You handed the dog to Ingrid, before all but tackling Mapi in a hug.

"Te gusta?" she asked triumphantly, already knowing the answer. You nodded into her embrace, taking a second to pull yourself together, before hugging Alexia and Ingrid in turn. You hoped the hugs would convey what words could not.

They stayed for a bit, helping you get the dog settled, and watching him when you ran to the store to get puppy supplies. When they left, you could tell they seemed slightly sad; everything they'd done, and they still didn't feel like it was enough.

As Alexia hugged you goodbye, she spoke softly into the top of your head. "I'm around, y/n, if you're having a rough time, or you need someone to talk to. Call me, text me. Anytime. Christmas Eve, Christmas Day, I don't care."

You nodded in response, entirely sure that you wouldn't take her up on that; she'd done enough already.

-----

The days leading up were fine, fun even, especially with a puppy to take care of. You didn't think the day would hit you as hard this year, which maybe was naive. It hid you harder than it ever had. For the first time in a while, you were experiencing love and care in the way you used to from your parents. It made you miss the old versions of them. This, in turn, had you furious at them for becoming the people they'd become, so vile, so cruel. It was like there were two versions of them in your head; the smiling, blurry figures from your childhood. The angry, mean, much more vivid memories from your teenage years.

You wished that they hadn't hate a part of to the point that they might as well have just hated you as a whole. You were poisoned to them, for something you couldn't control.

You were in the midst of what was becoming your annual breakdown, this time trying to keep your sobs quiet as your puppy was passed out on the couch next to you, when your phone rang. It was Mapi calling. You picked up before you could stop yourself, desperate to hear a kind voice.

"Hola pequeña! Just wanted to check in," Mapi sang over the phone.

"Hola Mapi," you responded softly, not really sure how to disguise how upset you were, now that you'd picked up.

"Are you okay y/n?" she asked, her voice much quieter.

"Yeah. Today just isn't very much fun."

"I'm sorry, pequeña. Is there anything I can do?" she asked, and this was what broke you. She'd done so much, yet she was still so desperate to make it better. It didn't make sense to you, why this person cared more about you and your happiness than your parents had.

You tried to keep your sobs muffled, not wanting to alarm Mapi, but she could tell what was going on. She didn't seem to know what to say or what to do, and you felt embarrassment flood your body at the fact that you were openly sobbing on the phone to your older teammate. You bit your lip, hard, forcing yourself to steady your breaths so you could speak.

"Fuck, I'm sorry Mapi. I'm fine, don't worry. Enjoy your Christmas.

"No, y/n, wait,"

You hung up. You fell apart again, burying your face in the soft couch cushions. Your phone buzzed under you again and again, no doubt Mapi calling you back. Time was a blur as you cried, and you really couldn't have said how much time passed before there was a frantic knock at your door. Your puppy barked, launching himself across the room towards the door.

You knew who it was before you even got up, cursing yourself for not answering one of Mapi's calls to assure her you were really fine. You should have known she'd call Alexia panicking.

Sure enough, when you opened your door, you got a quick glimpse of her face, outfit, hair, all telling you she had left some celebration to come to you, before she was smashing into you, pulling you into her arms. You were crying again, or maybe you'd never stopped, and Alexia pulled back to look down at your face, frantically checking to see if you were physically okay. Mapi's call must have been really panicked, then, if she hadn't explained well enough what had happened on your own phone call.

"What happened?" Alexia asked. You shrugged through your tears, which seemed to be enough to convince Alexia that you hadn't broken any bones. She led you back to your couch, tucking you into her side as she called Mapi back. She spoke quietly to her teammate, letting you feel what you needed to feel, and assuring Mapi that she had you, and that you'd be alright. It was reassuring to you, too, really.

Alexia's presence was unwavering, arm wrapped tightly around your shoulders, every so often wiping tears off your face. When you were done crying, finally, she handed you your water, instructing you to drink. You did, placing the water back down on the table, and scooping up your puppy back onto your lap.

"Sorry you had to come," You rasped eventually, running your fingers through the dogs fur, soothing him as well as yourself.

"Don't be. I'm glad Mapi called me. I'm glad she called you, you shouldn't have to be alone when you're upset."

"Your family-"

"-all understood that I needed to be here," she finished, gaze fixed steadily on you.

"Thank you for coming," you said, pausing. "I'm not really used to this. All these people caring."

"Well, you better get used to it, because we all care about you, a lot. And we're always going to make sure you're okay, even when you tell us you are. You're not always very believable when you say you're fine."

Her words hit hard, and you sat in silence for a bit, until your puppy got bored, and attempted to gnaw on Alexia's hand. You both laughed, watching as he got distracted again, this time by your foot sticking out of a blanket.

"Come on, get dressed. We'll take him to go meet my family. Get some of that energy out."

Alexia presented this as a statement, but her face held a question, and you knew she would stay here with you, if that's what you wanted. You were surprised to find that it wasn't. You took her outstretched hand, and she smiled triumphantly. You smiled too. When you'd moved here, you hadn't smiled much. You found yourself smiling a lot more now; because of your teammates mostly. They had changed your life, when you hadn't realized you'd needed it to be changed. It was really amazing, what a little love could do for someone who was hurting.

-----

that was so much longer than i intended!!!! got a tad carried away. also mapi didn't tear her meniscus in this because i said so.

[wheresarizona]

Terra Incognita

pairing: Javier Peña/f!Virgin Reader (no physical descriptions)

summary: Being the secretary for the attaché, Javier Peña, isn’t too bad. In the months you’ve worked together, he’s warmed up to you. Having flirty conversations daily and being the only recipient of his rare smiles you know all means nothing since he’s your boss; your unattainable, unbelievably attractive boss you have a raging crush on. Then he decides to do the unthinkable and asks you out for a drink, and not an innocent, HR-approved drink between colleagues, but a forbidden, going on a date drink—that goes so well you ask him to take your virginity and make you orgasm for the first time. 

He happily obliges. 

rating: E (18+!! No y/n, can be read as age gap (reader’s age is unspecified, but she’s at least 23), Soft Javier Peña, Inexperienced Reader, boss/employee relationship (very consensual, he puts you in control), explicit smut, loss of virginity, first time, first orgasm (Javier teaches you how to touch yourself), unprotected p in v (wrap it up!), creampie (it’s me), oral sex (f receiving), vaginal fingering, masturbation (f), mirror sex, dirty talk, praise kink, spit mention, (1) spank, Javier being a consent king, sneaking around, insecurity, self-esteem issues, Javier making you feel beautiful, feelings, Javier being cute and flirty, talks of the future, Javier hating you think he’s too hot for you)

word count: 12.8k+

a/n: I got an ask about doing reader’s first time with Javier months ago, and this week, I finally had a chance to write it. There’s plot, there’s a lot of porn, this took on a life of its own, and I’m sorry about how long it took me to get around to it. I hope you enjoy! Takes place during Season 3 of Narcos, a couple of months before they get Gilberto. Thank you so much to @senorabond for betaing super last minute!

Thank you for reading! Comments and reblogs feed me. I’d love to know what you thought!

Masterlist

“Peña,” he answers on the second ring. 

Sitting at your desk outside Javier Peña’s office, you have the corded phone receiver held to your ear and documents in front of you that you’re preparing for his signatures. 

“I have someone from the ambassador’s office on the other line,” you tell him. “I’m going to assume you’re in a meeting?”

He isn’t. 

The smile is clear in his voice when he replies, “Yeah, I’m definitely in a meeting.”

“I’ll send them to your voicemail.”

“Thank you.”

“It’s no problem, sir.”

“Just Javi.”

“It’s no problem, Just Javi.”

An amused breath leaves him. “Smartass.”

“I’m just calling you what you requested. I need to take care of this call. Bye, Just Javi.”

“Javi. Bye, Florecita (little flower).”

The nickname makes you smile, knowing he calls you it because there’s always a bouquet on your desk—today, it’s daisies. 

Pressing a couple of buttons has you back on the line with the other person, apologizing that your boss is indisposed in a meeting and transferring them to his voicemail. Immediately, you return to the task you were working on before being interrupted. 

Being the secretary for the attaché isn’t too bad. 

For months now, you’ve worked with Javier, and at first, he didn’t even know what to do with you until requests started coming in for him to attend meetings, be on conference calls, and turn in paperwork by deadlines. That's when he tagged you in to be the keeper of his schedule. He was polite and professional at the beginning of your partnership, and a little sulky, which you figured had to do with the job. Over time, he still sulked, but he’s warmed up to you, especially with how you run interference with his calls that come through and keep him from talking to people who annoy him to the best of your ability. Occasionally, he has to speak to them; rarely, however, because you have no issue lying through your teeth for him—he gets grumpy after those calls so it’s better for him to hardly take them. 

He’s friendlier now than when you first met, and the only time you’ve seen him crack a smile is when he’s talking to you. The first and every time after he has made you feel like you’re melting—yes, you have a crush on your boss. 

Have you seen him? 

Those suits? The hair? The mustache? His shoulder-to-waist ratio? His ass? He’s gorgeous, and you don’t have a chance in hell, so you bask in the smiles he gifts only to you, and the fun, flirty conversations that aren’t leading to anything since he’s your boss, and way out of your league. 

Glancing at the watch on your wrist informs you it’s time for lunch—it’s crazy how quickly time flies when you’re working sometimes. The small stack of papers on your desk gets stapled and set off to the side and out of the way. When you pull open your bottom desk drawer, your purse is in there, along with two small paper lunch sacks. Pulling the latter out, one is set in the space the papers once occupied, and the other you carry as you roll your chair back and get up. It’s only a handful of steps to the closed door, rapping your knuckles against it twice. 

“Come in,” says a voice from inside. 

Opening the door, you make your way in, closing it behind you. Your boss is sitting at his desk sans his navy blue suit jacket, a cigarette cushioned between his plush lips, wisps of smoke rising from it as he reads over documents. 

That’s another thing about Javier—you’re pretty sure he lives on coffee and cigarettes, not buying it anytime he says he’s quitting them. 

To be annoying, you put the paper bag directly over what he’s reading. His head pops up to look at you with his big, brown puppy dog eyes, his fingers pulling the lit nicotine from his mouth and depositing it into the glass ashtray he keeps within reach.  

“I’ve told you, you don’t have to bring me lunch,” his words come out in a deep rasp. 

Crossing your arms over your chest, you can’t help but snort, noticing his gaze dropping to your bosom for a split second before it’s back on yours. 

“That’s a lie,” you reply, and he frowns. “You always forget to eat because you’re too busy working. So, the solution is for me to bring you food. That way, you can eat and keep doing all your important stuff.” 

His eyes dart away as he sighs. “Can I pay you for the lunches?” he asks. “You probably didn’t have making lunch for your helpless boss in your food budget.” 

You smile. “I didn’t, but I’m happy to make them for you. There’s no need for you to pay me for the food.” 

His eyes meet yours. “There’s gotta be some way for me to thank you.” He sits back in his chair, letting you take in the ample breadth of his shoulders in his white dress shirt, his red patterned tie running down the center of his chest. “How about I take you out for a drink tonight?” 

That causes your brain to record scratch. 

“A drink… with me?” you answer slowly. 

There’s a confused expression on his face. “Yeah? I would’ve asked you sooner, but I’m always fucking working, and tonight I’m free—this entire weekend, I am, as long as I’m not called in.” 

He would’ve asked you sooner?

“I know you are…” You are the keeper of his schedule. “It’s just a thank you drink…?” 

His hand goes to his mouth, your eyes stuck on the journey his thumb makes, swiping over his bottom lip and wondering for the thousandth time what it’d be like to kiss him. 

“Can be…” he answers, his eyes darkening when you look at them. “Or, it can be more if that’s what you want.” 

He wants to go on a date with you? 

“I like the sound of more,” you quietly reply. 

“I like the sound of more, too.” And you’re gifted with one of his smiles, this one crooked and charming. 

It makes you swallow, your skin feeling heated. “I just want to make sure I’m reading this right,” you start, feeling discombobulated. “You’re asking me out on a date, right? Me?” You point at yourself, so there’s no mistaking who you mean. 

That confused look is back on his face as he leans forward. “Yes, I am asking you—” He points at you. “—to go out with me.” He points at himself. “Why are you so surprised? I like you.” 

Your eyes widen. 

“You like me?” 

“Yes? Querida (Darling), why are you having trouble believing I’m interested in you?” 

This is so embarrassing, you have to cover your face in your hands, your voice muffled when you answer, “Because you’re extremely attractive, and I’m me, and I’ve seen the women you normally go for.” Everybody knew about his one-night stand with the woman who worked here. “I’m nowhere near as beautiful as them.” 

The sound of his chair wheels rolling met your ears, and seconds later, you jolt when big, warm hands are grabbing yours and pulling them away. A concerned look you’ve never seen is on his face, his thumbs rubbing over the backs of your hands. 

“Don’t say that,” he says in a soothing tone. “Wanna know something?” 

“Sure.” 

“I find you more attractive.” You huff in disbelief. “I’m serious,” he continues. “Not only do you look beautiful—” His hand moves to cup your cheek. “—what’s inside you is beautiful, too, with how thoughtful and caring you are. You’re also funny and smart. I’ve been dying to take you out.” The sincerity in his gaze takes your breath away. 

Has hell frozen over? Are pigs flying? How in the hell is this perfect specimen of a man interested in you? He’s adamant he is, and you know he’s telling the truth, which seems insane, yet it’s exhilarating. Your love life is non-existent; you’ve never even been in a relationship, not for lack of trying; it’s just no one’s ever been interested. Now, someone is, and he’s so hot. There’s just one big glaring problem…

“You’re my boss…” you point out. “We’re not allowed to have any kind of romantic relationship due to the fact there is a major power imbalance here.” 

“The person who has all the power is you. You decide how far things go and if things should end. I’d never fire you or hurt your career in any way if you wanted nothing to do with me—I just wanna take you out for a drink, and from there, it’s all you.” 

His last sentence causes a nervous flutter in your tummy. 

“Okay, I’d like to get a drink with you. What’s your plan for us not being seen together?” 

He smiles, taking a step closer so your bodies are practically touching, smelling his spicy cologne that makes your mouth go dry. “I’ll take you to this little hole-in-a-wall place I know. Can I pick you up at seven?” 

You frown. “You know I live in a building full of people who work here—they’ll see you.” He’s occasionally driven you to and from work when the usual person you carpooled with was sick. 

“I won’t go to your door. I can park in the back of the lot and call you to come out to me.” 

“Have you put a lot of thought into this?” you ask. 

His cheeks pink up while he looks away. “Yeah…” 

The answer makes your heart pound in your chest, wondering what all he’s imagined, and something comes to mind, your curiosity getting the better of you. 

“What, um, is your plan if after the drink we want to go somewhere quieter and more… secluded?” 

His eyes are back on yours, his voice going a little deeper. “I’d take you back to my place.” 

The thought of that both excites you and makes you nervous.

“People won’t see me?” 

“No one from here—I had them put me up somewhere away from everyone else.” 

“Oh.”

“Can I kiss you?” 

“Yes,” you breathe. 

As soon as you say the word, his lips descend on yours, his hand cradling your head, his other arm wrapping around your back to pull you into him. This is a scenario you’ve daydreamed about countlessly; and the real thing? Even better than you imagined—his lips are soft and plush, the kiss tender, working his mouth against yours in a way that has something stirring low in your belly. He tastes like cigarettes and black coffee, which shouldn’t be as appealing as it is, your body feeling warm, the skin hot where he touches, your fingers digging into his shoulders. 

The moment comes when your lungs ache for breath, and he kisses you one last time, ending it with a playful nip to your bottom lip, his own lifted in another smile. You’re breathing heavily, seeing his lips had reddened, his eyes heavy–lidded. 

“Was it everything you hoped for?” he asks. 

It’s hard to think, not knowing what he’s talking about. 

“Huh?” you answer. 

He’s smiling cheekily now. 

“All the times you thought about kissing me—actually doing it, was it how you imagined?” 

The way your stomach drops, feeling your face heat. 

“Oh my god,” you gasp. “Was I that obvious?”

“Yeah. You don’t know how many fucking times I thought about giving you what you wanted.” 

“I am so embarrassed.” You squeeze your eyes shut. 

“Don’t be. I love it, and it gave me hope you’d agree to go out with me.” 

Looking away, you tell him, “It was better…” 

He grins, his head moving to kiss the side of your mouth, turning so your lips can meet. It’s quick, him whispering, “Yeah?” When he breaks away, nudging his nose against yours. 

This sweetness has you feeling all gooey. 

“Yes.” 

“Eat lunch with me.” 

“Is that an order from my boss or Javi?” 

He sighs, pressing his forehead to yours. “It should’ve been a question from me, Javi—sorry.” 

You smile, pecking him on the lips. “In that case, my answer is yes. I’ll need to go grab my food.” 

Both of his arms hug around your middle, pressing his face into your neck. “I don’t wanna let you go yet.” 

Hugging him back, you reply, “Okay,” kissing his hair. 

Him being all touchy-feely and sweet is very unexpected but a welcome surprise. 

The blinds are all closed on the glass walls that enclose a good portion of his office, and there’s no worry of anyone stumbling upon the two of you in this embrace since they’d knock first. With how his body relaxes into yours and the way he lets out a happy sigh, it seems this hug is something he’s needed, and you’re more than willing to give him the comfort. 

“If you ever need a hug, just let me know,” you whisper. 

His arms loosen, raising his head to look at you. 

“Thanks. What, uh, if I need a kiss?” 

You giggle. “Same. Just let me know.” 

“I think I need one before you go.” 

“I will be gone for less than thirty seconds.” 

“It’s thirty seconds too long.” 

“You’re ridiculous,” you reply in exasperation. “Kiss me, you goober.” 

And he does, slotting his mouth against yours, kissing you. 

It might’ve lasted seconds or a minute, you’re not sure, with how lost you get in his lips on yours and his body pressed so close. When he finally pulls away, you chase his mouth, and he chuckles, making you frown. 

“Go get your lunch, Florecita,” he rasps. “We’ll eat, finish working, and tonight, I’ll kiss you as much as you want.” 

Opening your eyes, they’re locked on his, smiling as you reply, “I like that plan.” 

He has the same expression, his eyes crinkling at the edges. “I do, too.” With that, he gives your hips one last squeeze and walks to sit behind his desk again, and you make the quick trip to get your lunch and bring it back, shutting the door behind you. 

Javier tries to get you to pull one of the chairs in front of his desk around to sit beside him; however, you give him a firm no in case someone comes by. Instead, you end up across from him, talking between bites of your sandwiches and chips. 

There are things you already know about him, such as he’s from Texas, only his father is alive, and, of course, how he helped take down Pablo Escobar. During this lunch, you learn his mother passed away five years ago; he has no siblings but a large extended family, he dearly misses his mother’s tamales, he’s still good friends with Steve Murphy, and he grew up on a cattle ranch where his father still lives. 

You finish your food, and you put all the garbage into the paper bag to throw out. 

“What are your plans for the weekend?” you ask him. “I can’t remember the last time you had one off.” 

“I haven’t.” He crumples up his trash in his own bag. “And I’m not sure yet what my plans are,” he answers with a wink, your mouth falling open. 

Clearing your throat, you quickly get up, avoiding eye contact with how hot your face feels. 

“What about you?” he asks. 

“Um, I’m not sure, either.” The original plan was to deep clean your apartment, but now, with your date tonight and Javi having the whole weekend off, things might be changing. 

“Maybe we can figure out something together tonight.” 

“Maybe,” you reply, walking backward with your garbage in your hand, still avoiding looking at him. “I have to get back to work, Mr. Peña, sir—”

“Just Javi,” he interrupts. 

“I have to get back to work, Just Javi, and pretend like I don’t know what it’s like to kiss you or think about how I’m going out with you tonight, so if you can do me a favor and not be sexy for the next—” You check your wristwatch. “—three hours and fifty-eight minutes, I’d greatly appreciate it.” 

“I’ll try…?”

Your back bumps against the door. 

“Great!” Taking a deep breath, you chance a glance at him to see he’s smiling. “Me?” you whisper in disbelief, reaching behind you to grab the door handle. “He likes me?” 

Turning, you open the door, Javier saying loud enough for you to hear, “Yes, you,” and butterflies flutter rapidly around in your belly. 

Thankfully, the rest of the day goes by quickly, the two of you staying very professional, aside from the one kiss he stole when you needed him to sign something. 

When it was time to leave, you told him goodbye from the doorway, and he made you wait so he could walk you to the car park, where you went to catch a ride with your friend, and he walked to his Jeep. 

With how nervous you were, dinner was light and quick once you got home, followed by taking your time to get all gussied up for your date—showering, getting out your cutest black dress, doing your hair and makeup, and spritzing on some perfume. 

Doubt creeps its way into your brain that maybe you imagined all that happened—Javi didn’t ask you out, Javi didn’t kiss you or hold you in his arms. It makes you think there isn’t actually going to be a date, and all the work you put into getting ready is for nothing. You try your best to push it down; becoming nervous because it all did happen, and you are going out with him, making your mind race with possibilities of what could happen that evening—what you hope will happen. 

By the time it’s five to seven, you’re so lost in thought you practically jump out of your skin when your home phone rings on the wall in the kitchen. Making your way there, you answer it on the third ring, picking up the receiver to your ear. 

“Hello?” 

“Hey, It’s me. I’m here.” 

“Okay, I’m heading down.” 

“Can’t wait to see you. Bye.” 

“Bye.” 

Hanging up the phone, you grab your purse, put on a jean jacket, and slip on some sensible, easy-to-walk-in heels as you leave, locking up your apartment tightly. 

It’s a Friday night, and you live in a large apartment complex, trying to avoid as many people as possible as you leave. 

Do you ensure no one is around as you walk into the parking lot, trying to keep to the shadows? Yes. 

The sun has already gone down, the headlights off on Javi’s Jeep, the vehicle dark at the back of the parking lot, save for the tiny orange glow of the cigarette he’s inhaling.

The overhead light doesn’t even come on when you open the passenger door and jump in, the dashboard and radio softly glowing. His window is partly down, and he tosses what he’d been smoking. 

He leans toward you, and you stop him with one palm, the other digging in your purse on your lap, relying on feeling around to get what you’re looking for, finally finding it. 

There’s a shining stick of gum between your fingers when you hold them up to him. 

“You’re the hottest man I’ve ever met,” you say, “and I’m really into you, but I’d prefer not to make out with someone who tastes like an ashtray.” 

He sighs, taking and unwrapping the gum. “I’m quitting,” he grumbles, putting it in his mouth and chewing, the wrapper getting rolled into a ball and tossed in the empty cup holder between you. 

“Uh-huh, sure, Javi. You’ve been saying that for months now,” you reply, patting his chest. 

Snatching your hand, he brings it to his lips, softly kissing each of your knuckles. 

“I’ll get some nicotine gum tomorrow, so you’ll kiss me.” 

That has you taken aback. 

“You’re going to stop smoking, so I’ll kiss you…?” 

“It’s one of the perks, and I know you fucking hate the habit.” That’s true. “Is my mouth minty enough? I wanna kiss you.” 

The fact you could smell the spearmint on his breath told you it was, your hands pulling his head toward you, smashing your lips against his. You can feel him smiling, his large palm cradling the back of your head, and allowing him to deepen the kiss when his tongue seeks entry into your mouth, unable to keep from moaning when it slides against your own. 

Kissing, you have some experience with, not a lot, but some, so you follow his lead, and he takes your breath away. 

When he pulls back, you feel dazed with your eyes closed, heart pounding, and chest heaving. 

“You okay?” he asks.

Blinking open your eyes, you answer breathily, “Yes. You’re just really good at that—wait, why is there gum in my mouth?” you ask, chewing it. 

When did he slip it in?

In the lowlights of the radio, you can see him smiling as he laughs, and you’re almost positive this is the first time you’ve heard such a wonderful sound, determined to hear it again. 

“You’re adorable,” you say, cranking down your window, spitting out the wad, and rolling it up again. “And I’m positive you’re going to be the death of me.” 

His hand guides your chin to make you look at him, a serious look on his face. “I’m not gonna be the death of you,” he replies.

“With how much I like you, how hot you are, and the way you kiss? I’m fucked.” 

“We’re both fucked.” 

When he finally starts driving, his hand holds yours on your thigh, confirming he’s a big physical touch person, always needing to be touching you. 

It’s quiet as he takes you out of the area you’re familiar with. For you, it’s because your stomach is aflutter with nerves, and you’re trying to figure out what’s going to happen, or really what you want to happen that night. How far do you want to take things? He said you’re the one who decides. How brave are you? 

The place you end up is unfamiliar to you, Javi parking along the curb and jumping out to come around and get your door. He’s smiling as he offers you a hand to help you out that you happily take, his eyes moving up and down your body when you stand in front of him. 

“You’re so fucking beautiful,” he says, shutting the car door. 

It’s your turn to check him out, seeing he’s in criminally tight jeans, a maroon button-up, and a black leather jacket. 

“You’re pretty handsome yourself.” 

“Thanks. I promised you a drink.”

“Yes, you did.”

Your purse is dangling on your shoulder, Javi taking your hand as he leads you down the sidewalk, past a bakery and a little mini-mart, until you arrive at your destination. It’s a tiny neighborhood bar, the wooden sign above naming it La Sirenita.

“Is the owner a big Disney fan?” you ask before entering. 

“What?” His eyebrows scrunch together, his free hand ready to pull open the door. 

“It’s called ‘The Little Mermaid,’ like the Disney movie from a few years ago,” you explain. 

“I haven’t seen that… It’s named La Sirenita because the owner used to work on a fishing boat and swears when he fell overboard once, a mermaid saved him.” 

“That’s basically the plot of the movie…” 

His eyebrow rose. 

“Florecita, this bar has been here for twenty fucking years. He didn’t name it after some dumb kid’s cartoon.” 

“The Little Mermaid is a masterpiece of cinema, thank you very much. Now, let’s get inside.” 

As you expected, the inside has artist's renderings on the walls of mermaids, and over the bar is a fishing net. Seats line the bar top, and there are a few tables and a few booths. The place is not too terribly busy, spotting one empty two-person table in a corner. It’s not very loud, with people talking and laughing, music playing in the background at a reasonable volume. All in all, the atmosphere is lovely. 

“Do you wanna go have a seat, and I’ll grab our drinks?” he asks, nodding toward the empty table you spotted. 

“Sure,” you answer, telling him what you’d like. 

There’s no one here you recognize, which makes you breathe easily, hanging your purse on the back of your chair with your jacket, sitting down, and looking around the room. A few minutes later, Javi arrives with the drinks, not even a little surprised he got a whiskey for himself. 

He’s in the seat across from you, taking a sip while you stare into your glass. 

“I’m going to be honest with you,” you say. “This is technically my second date.” 

His hand reaches to grab yours on the table, rubbing his thumb over the back of it. 

“I don’t date either. Fuck, I’ve been in one relationship? And it was a fucking nightmare.” 

Lifting your head, you ask, “So, you’re not interested in dating or being in a relationship? It’s okay if you’re just looking for something casual without commitment.” 

You’ll take him any way you can get him. 

“Shit.” His eyes close tightly, pressing his fingers to his brow. “I already fucked up. I should’ve said, ‘I didn’t date until now,’ and I am interested in being in a relationship with someone right for me. The last person… wasn’t.” 

Hope rises in you. 

“Okay. That’s good to know.” 

His hand drops, gaze meeting yours. “Are you interested in all that? Or just wanting something casual?” 

“I’m interested in dating and a relationship. I’ve never been in one, but I think I can figure it out.” 

He smiles, his hand tightening around yours. “You can,” he replies. 

You hide your own smile by taking a drink and setting it back down after some seconds. 

“What do you want to talk about?” you ask. 

“I wanna hear your story.” 

“It’s awfully boring compared to yours.” 

“I don’t care. I wanna hear it.” 

“Fine.” 

And you give him a rundown of your family—divorced parents who remarried, and now you have a handful of younger half-siblings. Graduated from high school, went to college, and got a degree in business, and you’re in your current job because the pay and benefits are decent, and it puts you on a different continent than your family. He, of course, inquires why that’s a good thing, to which you have to explain they always need something from you—money, favors, your time, but can never help when you’re in need. Thus, you moved far away to make it so they couldn’t use you anymore. 

The glasses in front of you both become empty, so he gets each of you another drink. 

Then it’s his turn to share—he loves his family, misses his mom, and talks to his dad at least once a week; he does know how to ride a horse and does not like wearing cowboy hats but loves the boots and wears them when he’s feeling a little homesick. He doesn't bother telling you all of his history with the DEA because you pretty much know all of it. However, he does give you the details about his failed relationship with a woman named Lorraine from his hometown, who treated him like shit, and claimed to be pregnant when he tried to leave her so he’d have to marry her. Luckily, he discovered the lie the night before the wedding and left her at the altar, which he recognizes was a shitty thing to do, telling you he apologized to her the last time he was home.

Things get more lighthearted when he tells you stories about cooking with his mom growing up and her teaching him, getting flirty about his skills. 

“I make a good breakfast,” he tells you, winking as he takes a drink. 

It feels hot in the room, stifling almost, gulping while your eyes look anywhere else than at him, trying to figure out in your flustered state how to respond. 

“I bet you make a good breakfast,” is what comes out, your eyes rounding. 

“You’ll have to try it and let me know.” Your gaze latches onto his, seeing him smirking. His lips are shiny from his whiskey, and all you can think about is kissing them and tasting it on him. 

“Come here,” he says, pushing back in his chair. The second drink in your system gives you the courage to get up and walk around the table, letting him pull you down to sit across his lap with your legs dangling over the side. His arm locks around your back, his other hand stroking your cheek. 

The tip of his nose rubs against yours. 

“You wanna kiss me?” he purrs. 

“Yes,” you whisper. 

“Then do it.” 

Crushing your mouth to his, your fingers end up in his hair, surprised by the softness. The kissing heats when he presses his tongue between your lips, tasting the whiskey when it tangles with your own. Maybe it’s the alcohol, or him, or a combination of it both, but your skin feels so hot you’re wishing there were no clothes on your body. Your lungs start to ache, and his mouth moves to your jaw so you can take a deep breath. 

“What do you want?” he asks between kisses. 

“You,” you gasp. 

“You wanna get out of here?”

The throbbing you’re feeling between your legs has you answer immediately, “Yes.” 

His hand, not on your back, moves down to grab the side of your ass while he sucks on your pulse point, the sensation making you moan.

“There’s just a bit of a problem,” you force out, trying to ignore the burning arousal in your belly. 

His head rises to look you in the eyes, his mouth turned down in a frown. 

“I’ve got condoms,” he says quickly. “And I’m clean—got tested recently.” 

“That’s wonderful?” you reply, unsure how to respond. “I’m on birth control? But the problem has nothing to do with preventing babies and STDs…” 

“What’s the problem…?”

There’s no way you can look at him, so you close your eyes. 

“It’s a problem I’m really hoping you can help me with, actually, if you’re willing.” 

“What is it?” 

“I’ve, um, never had sex?” you say in a hushed voice. “And it’d be great if you could fix that…” 

There’s still chatter, laughter, and music happening around you, but in the little bubble of the two of you, it’s silent—which goes on for too long, and you open your eyes to see a gobsmacked look on Javier’s face. 

“Javi?” 

“Never?” he asks, barely above a whisper. 

“Never.” 

He must regain his bearings because he asks, “But you’ve fooled around with people, right?” 

“I’ve done some kissing and rubbing over clothes?” 

There was an almost drunken hookup in college, but you chickened out. 

“Jesus Christ,” he breathes. 

“If this is too much pressure, you can tap out. I just trust you and know you’ll do it right and take care of me.” 

“Are you sure?”

“Yes, absolutely. Zero hesitation.” 

He nods his head. “Okay, I’ll do it, but if you change your mind at all, you tell me.” 

A thrill runs through you. 

“Of course.” 

“Good.” 

“One other thing…” 

“Yes?” 

“I’ve also never orgasmed…” 

That has him harshly whispering, “What?!” A look of disbelief on his face. “Don’t you touch yourself?” 

“Not really,” you reply, shrugging. “I could never really figure it out.” 

“Get up.” He pushes you to stand from his lap. “We’re leaving right now.” He gets up, pulling his wallet from his back pocket, tossing some cash onto the table while you grab your purse and jacket. His billfold is back where it belongs, and he takes your hand, pulling you out of the bar in a hurry. 

He’s driving fast once you’re both belted into his Jeep. 

“What is going on, Javier?” you ask. “Why are you being so intense about my lack of orgasms?”

His hand is gripping your thigh. 

“Because it’s not right you haven’t had one, and I need to fix that immediately.” 

“Maybe slow down, so we make it to your apartment safely?” 

He slows a tiny bit, and you count it as a win. 

His apartment building is definitely away from where you knew the other employees were housed and much nicer. He parks beneath the building in the parking garage and leads you to an elevator that requires him to enter a code in a keypad before it will work, your eyes bulging when he hits the number for the top floor. 

“I had them put me in the nicest place they could find with the budget they had for my housing,” he explains without you asking, standing beside you with his arm around your waist. “They offered me a house, but I preferred the security of this place.” There’d been a gate you had to come through to get onto the property. 

“It’s way nicer than my dingy apartment.” 

“I used to live in your apartments back in the day.”

Your eyebrow lifts. “Back in the day? It was literally, what? Maybe two or so years ago.” 

“Yeah, back in the day when I was nothing but a dumb DEA agent.” 

“Who helped take down Pablo Escobar… The Los Pepes shit was dumb, but you still made a difference.” 

“I guess.” You can hear him frowning. 

Turning your head toward him, he meets your eyes. 

“You made a difference, and now that you’re in charge, you’re gonna take out those Cali cartel fuckers, too.” 

A little smile curls up on his mouth. “Maybe.”

“You will.” 

“You have a lot of faith in me.” 

“Because you’re an amazing man who’s good at his job and actually gives a shit—you’re gonna do it, and I’ll celebrate with you when you do.” 

The elevator dings as the doors open, both of you walking out into a hallway, following as he goes to the right. 

“You’ll have a drink with me at the office?” 

“Sure, if that’s how you wanna celebrate.” 

Arriving at his door, he digs his keys out of his pocket and unlocks both locks. 

“How did you imagine we’d celebrate?” he asks, stepping inside and welcoming you in. 

The front door is closed and locked behind you while you use the wall beside it for balance to take off your heels, Javi already kicking off his boots and hanging up his jacket on a nearby coat rack. 

“I don’t know,” you answer, getting one shoe off, then the other. “Aren’t celebratory blow jobs a thing?” you ask as you straighten and face him, passing him your purse and coat, which he hangs up with his jacket. 

His eyes narrow. 

“You said you’ve never fooled around with anyone?” 

“Yeah?” Your arms cross in front of you. “I haven’t—I shouldn’t know different sex acts because I’m inexperienced? I’m a virgin, not a prude, and a very curious virgin who’s watched porn.” 

“...And you didn’t touch yourself?” 

“Watching the porn? I tried. Like I said, I couldn’t figure it out. Maybe I was thinking too hard?” 

“Maybe. I’ll get you there. Come on, baby,” he says, retaking your hand and leading you through his massive apartment that has a wall of floor-to-ceiling windows in the living and dining rooms. The place is sparse in terms of decorations and sticks to neutral colors—white, beige, and black. There’s furniture, of course, and a television in the living room, along with a bookcase with some books on it that you walk past into a hallway you assume leads to the bedroom. 

“How many bedrooms do you have?” you ask. 

“Two, but I converted the guest room into an office.” 

“You work too much.” 

“You got a better idea of what I can do with my time?” he asks over his shoulder. 

“Assuming you fuck as good as you kiss, yeah.” 

He chuckles, shaking his head as he faces forward. “You’re gonna be the fucking death of me.” 

His bedroom is spacious, featuring another wall of floor-to-ceiling windows, and also sticks to a neutral color scheme; his neatly made bed is king-size with bedside tables on either side and lamps atop them, spotting a dresser, a closet, and a door you assume leads to an en suite—the pièce de résistance that really pulls the place together are the panels of mirrors directly over the bed. 

“I like the horny—”

“They came with the apartment,” he cuts you off.

“Well, if you hate the mirror, why don’t you move the bed?” There’s enough room for him to place it somewhere else. 

Standing at the end of his massive bed, he turns to you, his dark eyes on yours. 

“Because I’d like a chance to use it.” His tongue peeks between his lips. 

“Wait, you haven’t fucked in here?” You have a hard time believing that. 

He sighs. “When would I have time?” he asks. “I’m always fucking busy or too fucking tired—I hate saying it, but I’m getting old.” 

“Javi, you’re not even forty. You’re not old.” 

“I feel old.” He pouts. 

Taking a step forward to press your body into his, you rub your hands up his chest. 

“Well, I think you’re young and sexy, and I’d love to use the mirror with you.” 

He’s crookedly smiling, his hands on your hips. 

“Yeah?” 

“Yes.” 

“Can I take off your clothes?” 

“Sure.” 

The nerves are back with a vengeance. 

Capturing your lips in a kiss, his palms move up your back, easily working down the zipper on your dress and helping to get it off your arms, where it falls, pooling around your feet. His mouth makes a wet path along your jaw while his fingers unhook your black lacy bra, where it quickly joins your dress—you’d been thankful you had one set of cute matching lingerie, Javi’s mouth moving down your neck to your chest. 

“Can I touch you?” he asks, placing a soft kiss over your thudding heart. 

“Yes,” you answer, confused about where to put your hands, so you rest them on your waist. “You can, um, touch me anywhere. I don’t mind.” 

He takes your tits into his hands, lightly massaging them while kissing the tops. When he sucks a pebbled nipple between his lips, you gasp at the shock of pleasure that shoots to your cunt—it feels so good as he sucks and nibbles at the hard bud, moving to the other to give it the same attention, your fingers ending up in his hair, unable to keep from moaning. 

You can feel your heart beating at the apex of your eyes, your panties feeling wet, and your desire thrumming in your core. 

His hot mouth continues its worship of your breasts, Javier grabbing your dominant hand and moving it down your body and under the elastic of your panties, having you slide two fingers through your wet slit. 

His lips leave you. “Feel how wet you are?” he asks, having you make another pass. 

“Yes,” you breathe, your eyes closed. 

“Does it feel good, Hermosa (beautiful)?” 

“Yes.” 

“While I suck on your gorgeous tits, I want you to rub right here.” He places two of your fingertips over your clit. “Do what feels good, but don’t be too gentle.” 

“What do you mean?” 

“Here.” Slowly, he has you start circling the nub, your breath catching in your throat. “It feels good,” he says, and you agree. “But you’re being too nice. Go faster and apply more pressure—don’t be afraid to fuck it up.” With that, you do as he instructed, your fingers rubbing furiously against your bundle of nerves. 

“Oh my god,” you moan at the pleasure coiling inside you. 

“Good girl,” he purrs. “Keep doing that for me, baby.” 

His mouth goes back to your breasts, and you feel like you’re losing your mind at how amazing the combined sensations feel. An odd tightening is happening in your center, getting tighter and tighter as every second passes. 

“Something,” you gasp. “Something feels weird.” 

His lips come off you with a pop.

“That’s good, Florecita. It means you’re close. Keep going, baby. Keep rubbing that pretty little clit and make yourself come. I want you to be my good girl and come for me.” 

Whenever he calls you his ‘good girl,’ a pleasant tingle moves down your spine. 

He’s back to sucking on your nipple while he rolls the other between his fingers, and the coil in your belly is winding so tight, it feels like something is going to happen, and it does—the coil snaps, and suddenly euphoria is overtaking your body feeling it spreading out from your center to your fingers and toes, Javier having to catch you when your legs give out, hugging you against him. 

“There it is,” he murmurs in your hair. “My good fucking girl coming for me. I knew you’d do it. Fuck, you’re amazing.” 

It takes you a minute to think a coherent thought and another to remember how to speak. 

“I know this is only our first date,” your words are coming out slurred, “but I don’t wanna let you go, like ever. I really like you, and it’s not because you helped me come.” 

“I don’t wanna let you go, either.” He kisses your head, hugging you tighter. “You wanna see where this will go?” 

“You mean I can be your secret girlfriend?” 

He snorts. “I’ll take you any fucking way I can get you—if I have to, I can switch you out with someone else’s secretary, and then it won’t be an issue.” 

“You’d hate that.” 

“I’d fucking hate that.” 

“Let’s date in secret—that sounds fun. Having rendezvous’, making out in storage rooms, fucking in your office—”

“Fucking in my office?” 

“The door’s got a lock. Lunchtime quickies. Especially on days when you’re stressed.” 

“You’re perfect.” 

“I’m horny, and I’d really like to see what you can do with this.” Your palm rubs over the front of his jeans, feeling him hard and straining against the zipper. 

He groans, and the sound goes straight to your pussy. 

“Can you stand?” he asks. 

Your legs are working fine now, putting all your weight on them. 

“Yeah.” 

His arms loosen around you to meet your gaze. 

“Do you wanna undress me?” 

“Yes.” You nod. “Am I allowed to touch you?” 

“You can do any fucking thing you want to me.” 

His answer makes you smile. “How romantic.” 

It’s a little nerve-wracking having his attention on you as you work open the buttons on his shirt, his hands soothingly rubbing over your bare hips. 

“Relax,” he whispers, leaning in to kiss your cheek. His lips are at your ear as you finish unbuttoning him and untuck his button-up from his jeans. “You’re doing good.” His breath tickles your skin. “All you’re doing is getting my clothes off.”

He calms you, but now you’re trying to figure out the logistics of getting the shirt off him. 

“Has anyone ever told you that you’re ridiculously broad?”

He huffs in amusement, standing to his full height to look at your face while he smiles. 

“No one has told me that.”

Now, you’re able to push the button-up off his shoulders and pull it to fall from his arms onto the floor. 

There’s a lot of golden skin in front of you, your eyes taking in the freckles, and his soft belly with the tantalizing trail of hair below his navel leading down into his jeans. 

“I’ve always wondered what you were hiding under those suits,” you murmur, rubbing your hands along the warm skin of his shoulders, down his chest, to his stomach. “And I’m not disappointed.”

“I love how you look naked, too.”

The comment makes you duck your head, feeling heat creep up your neck. 

His fingers go under your chin, tilting your face up to see his warm expression. 

“I mean it,” he says. “You’re beautiful, and I need you to believe me.”

The truth is clear in his eyes, yet it’s hard to accept he thinks that.

“I know you’re not lying to me.” Your gaze shifts to stare over his shoulder at the bare cream-colored wall. “No one’s ever wanted me,” you say quietly. “No one ever looked at me as more than a friend. My first date? Was with this guy I was best friends with from elementary through high school. I was madly in love with him, and he saw me as nothing more than the sister he never had. We only went on the date because it was our senior prom, and neither of us had dates, so we went together. No one has ever wanted me.” 

“I want you,” he replies with conviction, so there’s no doubt. “I want you, all of you.” 

It makes you sigh. “And that honestly is insane to me.” 

“I’m not liking whatever this shit is where you think I’m too attractive for you, or whatever the fuck it is,” he says, his hands going to his belt, hearing him unbuckling it. Your eyes flick back to his, and you’re greeted with the grumpy expression you’re used to seeing at work. He pops open the button on his jeans, and you hear the teeth pull apart as he unzips them, making you gulp. 

“Are you mad at me?” you ask.

“What?” His face pinches in confusion, pushing his pants down, and you can’t help but look—he’s not wearing underwear. Bobbing between his legs is his sizable hard-on that has your eyes rounding at wondering how it would fit inside you. “No, I’m not mad at you, baby—fuck, the way you’re staring at my dick is driving me crazy.” He steps out of his jeans and does the awkward dance of getting his socks off. 

“I’m trying to figure out how you’re gonna get that thing inside me.” 

He chuckles, his bare feet planted on the floor, putting his hands on his hips. 

“I’ll tell you, and you can keep touching me if you want, but first—” He closes the distance to have your bodies practically touching, his dick pressing into your stomach, while his palms come up to hold your cheeks, your own going over his. “—creo que eres hermosa y te deseo (I think you’re beautiful and I want you). Eres muy hermosa (You’re very beautiful). Te he deseado por mucho tiempo, y no sabes lo feliz que estoy de finalmente tenerte (I’ve wanted you for a long time and you don’t know how happy I am to finally have you).” 

“¿En serio (Really)?” you ask. 

“Sí (Yes).” He nods. “Estaba chingado desde la primera vez que te vi (I was fucked from the first time I saw you.”

“No, estás mintiendo (No, you’re lying).” 

“Sabes que no lo estoy y tu también estabas igual de chingada cuando me conociste (You know I’m not and you were also just as fucked when you met me). Admítelo (Admit it).”

“Por supuesto que estaba y aparentemente fui muy obvio al respecto (Of course I was, and apparently I was very obvious about it).”

He grins, and an adorable dimple appears in his cheek. “Así era yo (So was I).” 

Your eyes narrow. “How were you obvious, Javier?” 

He gives you a look. “Remember when I had that meeting with HR, uh, a month or so ago?” 

“Yeah?” 

“Apparently, people are under the impression we’re fucking.” 

“What?” 

“Yeah, caught me off guard, too. I guess I treat you differently than everyone else and act differently.” He shrugs. “I told them we just have a close professional relationship, and I’d do nothing untoward to jeopardize it.” 

“You say with your hard dick jabbing me.” Reaching down, you wrap your fingers around him, Javi’s mouth falling open—he’s hot to the touch, hard like steel, and smooth as velvet, slowly stroking him. 

His throat works as he swallows. “Got them off my ass.” 

“Good, now tell me how you’re getting this—” You squeeze him, and he groans. “—into me.” 

“Fuck, if you’ll let me, I’ll eat your pussy and use my fingers to loosen you up. Once I think you’re ready, I’ll get some lube to make fucking you as painless as possible.” 

“You want to go down on me?” 

He’s smirking under his perfectly trimmed mustache. 

“I’d love to go down on you. I wanna see how you taste,” he answers with a wink. 

It makes arousal stir in your belly at the thought. 

“Okay. I’d like that.” 

His lips descend on yours, kissing you while his hands grab your waist to turn you both so your back is to the bed, guiding you until your legs bump into it. One moment, his mouth is on yours, and the next, it’s not when he lifts you by the thighs onto the mattress with a grunt, pushing you further onto it. 

“Head on the pillow in the middle,” he orders, tapping your hip. 

Crawling back, you do as he says, Javi climbing up after you.

He’s on his knees, the bed dipping as he moves toward you, his big hands latching around your calves to spread your legs. He picks up one, bending and turning his head to kiss your inner ankle, keeping his eyes on yours while his lips blaze a trail along your leg to your knee. It feels like electricity is under your skin where he touches, it prickling, his mustache tickling you and making you squirm a little. He brings the other leg up and makes the same journey from ankle to knee that has you biting your lip and wishing he’d touch you where you are pulsing. 

His eyes are so dark hardly any of the familiar chocolate brown remains, excitement bubbling in you when he opens your legs further apart and moves to lie between them, setting them up on his broad shoulders. You’re still wearing your lacy panties, and he shoves his beautiful nose into them, feeling as he inhales deeply and groans, his head moving side to side, nudging your clit, the sensation causing you to dig your fingers into the bedding. 

He must get to the point where he can’t wait any longer, sitting up enough to tug your underwear down and off one leg before he’s back in position. For some odd reason, you suddenly feel self-conscious, shy, and embarrassed about being completely nude, hiding your eyes behind your hands. 

Javi rubs along your sides in comfort. 

“Are you having second thoughts?” he asks gently. 

“No,” you answer. 

“Is it being naked?” 

“Yes.” 

“I love your body, and I’ve told you I think you’re beautiful. Would you be more comfortable wearing one of my shirts?”

“Um, yeah, but I want to do this naked. It’s just new...” 

“Don’t force yourself,” he replies, kissing your inner thigh. 

This tiny conversation has made you feel much better, lowering your hands. Staring at the ceiling, you can see your naked body, and Javi’s lying between your legs in the mirror. 

“I’m not.” Sitting up on your elbows, you want to look at him, a reassuring smile on your face. “Okay, I’m ready.” 

His eyes lock on yours. 

“Promise me, you’ll stop me if I do something you don’t like.” 

“I promise.” 

“Good girl,” he purrs, and you shiver. 

With two fingers, he spreads open the lips of your pussy, and looks at it with a hungry gaze, wetting his lips like he can’t wait to taste. 

“So fucking pretty,” he says. “I’m gonna make you feel good—need to get you really wet.” 

Suddenly, you watch his jaw flex, him spitting onto your clit, you gasping at the warm saliva slowly dripping down toward your entrance. A loud moan leaves you when he dives in, his tongue licking a hot stripe up through your center, feeling the vibrations of his groans. It’s different, odd, new, and you can’t get enough. He has to lock an arm over your stomach to keep you from moving as he goes to work, lapping all over your folds, tracing every bit of your sensitive skin to get all your arousal from the source. 

“You taste so good,” his words are said against your cunt. 

Heat races up your spine as he sucks your clit between his lips, flicking his tongue over it with his pleasure-addled gaze on yours—it’s like nothing you’ve ever felt before, and it’s so good, every nerve in your body alight in bliss, your belly starting to tighten. 

“Oh my god,” you gasp. “It feels so good. I think you’re gonna make me come again.” 

Your heels dig into his back, your toes curl, fisting your hands in the comforter for something to hold on to while your thighs tremble. Somehow, he just knows how to take you apart, finding a rhythm that’s turning you into a mess.  

There are a few seconds where his mouth leaves you to suck on his fingers before he goes right back to working you over; your jaw’s slack, your skin’s heated, and there’s tension in your belly that’s rapidly growing. He carefully starts pressing one thick digit inside you, your eyes snapping shut as you whimper at the new sensation, so tight he has to wiggle it in order to get all the way in—his tongue is teasingly flicking over your sensitive bundle of nerves and counteracting the slight discomfort of his finger, eliciting soft sounds from your parted lips.

It takes some time to get used to the foreign feeling, it slowly turning into pleasure and fanning the growing flames in your tummy. Sucking hard on your clit, another digit slips inside, your body jerking at the intrusion and the stretch it causes, whimpering. 

“Relax, baby,” he says. “Your pretty little pussy is taking my fingers so well.” 

His mouth is back on you, and it’s a tight fit for his fingers, but thankfully, you’re wet enough it eases in, and he languidly works them until your body relaxes, and he’s easily pumping them in and out of you. 

It’s embarrassing how he reduces you to a mewling mess with how amazing he’s making you feel. 

“You’re doing so good for me,” his muffled voice says into your pussy. 

His mouth, his fingers, your stomach is bunching up into tight knots, knowing it will not take much more to get you there—it’s insane that before today, you’d never been able to make yourself come, and here’s this man on the precipice of making you orgasm for a second time.

You’re ruined. 

He’s ruined you for anyone else. 

His fingers twist and scissor to stretch you out, making you whimper, grabbing his hand on your tummy that he squeezes back. He crooks his digits, and on the next pass, he slides against something that has your back arching and eyes blurring with stars, moaning his name loudly. 

“There it is,” he groans into your skin. “Come for me, Florecita. Give me another.” 

His arm is like a band of iron holding you down as you writhe. 

It’s all too much—what he’s doing to you, hearing the squelching of his fingers, the obscene slurping noises, and the rough sounds coming from his throat. Your body is quivering uncontrollably, and then you’re shattering, falling back onto the pillow with your arms giving out, pleasure surging through you as you come with a silent cry. You can feel your cunt spasming around his fingers, your brain a blissful haze. 

His face comes up, his voice a rough rasp, “Good girl.” His fingers are still working inside you. “You’re fucking gorgeous when you come.” 

Your eyes are closed, riding out the high, and you’re starting to believe he actually does think you’re beautiful. Was there a tiny voice in the back of your head telling you he was saying all the sweet things just to get into your pants? Yes. But you’re almost positive he genuinely has feelings for you and does find you attractive. He’s given you so many opportunities to back out and offered to let you wear one of his shirts so you’d be more comfortable—guys who only want to get laid aren’t that kind. 

Javier obviously cares about you, which has you feeling over the moon. 

You’re coming down, your body starting to relax, and your heartbeat slowing. 

“Come up here and kiss me,” you say, sounding drunk and doing grabby hands at him. 

He chuckles, his fingers slipping out of you, and he gets out from under your legs. His mouth ghosts a trail of kisses over the soft skin of your belly to your chest and along your neck, leaving goosebumps in their wake until his hips are resting between your thighs and his face is over yours, smelling your musk on him. 

“You’re gonna boss me around at work and home?” he asks, kissing your chin, the question causing your heart to skip a beat.

At work and home. 

“Maybe.” You wrap your arms around him, feeling his hard cock pressing into your belly. “Someone's gotta do it.” 

“Mmm, I like it when you boss me around.” He kisses your cheek. 

“Kiss me.” 

His lips press to your other cheek, your eyes opening to glare at him. 

“I said kiss me,” you order. 

“I am kissing you.” A peck to your jaw. 

You pinch his ass, and he chuckles. “Please kiss me on the mouth.” 

He’s smiling. “I can do that.” 

His lips claim yours in a hot, open-mouthed kiss, running your fingers through his hair and moaning at tasting yourself on him. His tongue plunders your mouth, licking the edges of your teeth and tangling with your own, Javi’s hips slowly rutting into you to ease his throbbing dick leaking on your skin. There’s an ache you’re feeling deep in your core that needs to be filled, and you know he’s the only one who can ease it. 

Coming up for air, he kisses along your jaw, nibbling on your chin. 

“Javi?” his name comes out breathy. 

Immediately, his head moves into your vision with a look of concern.  

“What’s wrong?” 

“Nothing’s wrong. I want you to fuck me.” Your lip pulls between your teeth.

“Are you sure? I can finger you some more.” 

Smiling, you stroke his cheek. “Javi, please fuck me.” 

“Okay.” He nods. “Let me grab a condom and some lube.” He starts to move, and you stop him by grabbing his arm. 

“You’re clean?” you ask. 

“Yeah.” 

“I’m on birth control—it helps with my periods. I’m obviously clean, too, and okay without the condom if you are.” 

His eyes go a little wide, and he swallows hard. “You’d let me fuck you bare?” 

“I trust you and want to know what it feels like without the barrier. Is that okay?” 

“Fuck,” he breathes. “You’re on birth control?” 

“Yes.” You nod. “The pills are in my purse if you want proof.”

“I believe you. Shit, yeah, it’s okay. I’m kicking myself in the ass right now for not asking you out sooner.” 

“Because you could’ve been having a lot of condomless sex?” you ask with an arched brow. 

He frowns. “I care about more than sex,” he answers defensively. “You know I care about more than sex, right? I’d be happy with cuddling with you in bed or on the couch and talking if you didn’t want to fuck right now—hell, I’d be happy falling asleep with you. It’s as long as you’re with me, and I wish I would’ve asked you out sooner so I could’ve had more time with you outside of work.” 

What he says makes you feel like you’re floating—you knew his feelings were genuine. 

“Oh, I know you care about more than sex,” you reply right away. “To be honest, you’re very dreamy, Javier. Like, you make me swoon. I’ve thought about investing in a fainting couch.” He snorts. “But, seriously—” Your palm presses to his jaw. “I know you care about more than sex. I mean, there was that time you had soup delivered to my apartment when I was sick, and now that I know where you live geographically, you had to drive really out of your way to carpool with me for that one week.” When the usual person you rode with was out with a bad flu. 

“That was a good week.” He smiles, turning his head to kiss your palm. “And the flowers.” 

Your eyebrows crease. “What flowers?” 

His eyes sparkle. “The bouquet on your birthday.” 

“The mystery bouquet was you?” you ask in disbelief. 

It’d been a large, beautiful bouquet of your favorite flowers whose card only wished you a happy birthday with no name or idea of who’d sent them. 

“Yeah.” 

“Javier, you ridiculously sweet man.” Sitting up, you kiss him, something tender and loving. Breaking apart, you say, “Okay, now I can see how you obviously like me. I have no idea how I missed it.” 

His lips turned down, Javi sighing. “You didn’t see it ‘cause you convinced yourself I wouldn’t be interested in you.” 

“And the whole you being my boss and figuring you wouldn’t break the rules. Now I’ve learned not to make assumptions.”

“Fuck the rules.”

“Aren’t you the rebel. What do you want to do?” 

He looks confused. “Huh?” 

“All night, you’ve been focusing on me, and I want to know what you want to do. Would you prefer cuddling naked and talking, or do you wanna have sex?” 

“Sex,” he answers immediately, making you giggle. 

“Which are you more excited about, taking my virginity or fucking me bare?” 

“Fucking without a condom. I’m happy I get to be your first so I can make sure it’s good for you, but I’m really fucking excited to be inside you with nothing on.” 

“I’m really excited to feel you inside me with nothing on, and I’m happy you’re my first, too. I wanted you to do it because I knew you’d take care of me.”

What you say makes him smile. “I am. Let me get what I need.” Quickly, he pecks you on the lips before moving off of you, the mattress jostling as he heads toward the bedside table on the left side of the bed. He’s stretching and reaching inside the drawer, returning to you with a small bottle, kneeling between your spread legs. “I’m just gonna use my fingers to make sure you’re ready,” he says, popping the cap and slicking up his digits. 

Looking in the mirror above, you watch and feel as he presses in one that goes in easily, then a second. His attention is on you, his focus alternating between his fingers buried inside your wet cunt, and the expressions your face is making as he slides in a third that stretches you more than before and really tests your limits, reveling in the burn. His other hand is rubbing your thigh. “Relax, baby,” he says, pushing them in and out and spreading them. There’s a thin layer of sweat on your skin, and it takes a second for you to do as he told you. “Do you still want me to fuck you?” he asks. 

You nod your head in answer. 

“Words, Florecita. I need to hear it.” 

“Yes, Javi. I want you.” More than anything, you leave out. 

“I think you’re ready.” He removes his hand. “If it hurts too much or you want me to stop, tell me, and I will immediately. Do you understand?” 

“Yes, Javi.” 

“Good girl.” 

The bottle being opened sounds again, seeing Javi in the mirror stroking lube onto his hard shaft, it glistening in the lights of the room. Your heart is hammering in your chest over what’s about to happen, nerves fluttering all about in your tummy so rapidly you think they might get out. 

He shuffles forward a little, rubbing the tip of his cock through the wetness between your folds. 

“Are you ready?” he asks. 

“Yes.” 

It’s sweet that he moves to have his body over yours, holding himself on one arm beside your head while the other hand notches himself at your entrance—he distracts you by pressing his soft lips against yours in a searing kiss as he slowly starts sliding into you. He has you moaning into his mouth as he fills you, your tight walls stretching around him to accommodate his girth, digging your fingernails into his shoulders. Surprisingly, there’s no pain; Instead, you’re wondering how much more of him you can take with how insanely full you already feel when he’s barely halfway in. 

When his hips finally meet yours, you can’t breathe. 

It’s almost too much for you and bordering on overwhelming. 

The kiss ends, his eyes searching yours while his words come out strained, noticing the sweat on his brow, his bangs sticking to his forehead, “Are you okay?”

Finally, you suck in air. “So big,” you gasp. 

He looks worried. “Is it too much? Do you want me to pull out?” 

“No.” You shake your head. “I just need a second.”

“Okay.” He kisses the tip of your nose, then sweetly nuzzles his face against yours. “You feel better than I imagined. I could stay like this for hours, having your tight little pussy warming my dick. You’re so fucking tight and wet, squeezing me like a goddamn vice. Once I get going, I don’t know how long I’m gonna last ‘cause this perfect cunt is gonna milk me dry.” 

Everything he’s saying has arousal thrumming in your veins, your body getting used to having him inside you to the point you need him to do something, anything at all.  

“Move,” you tell him. 

His eyes meet yours, a flush covering his cheeks. “Okay.” He hitches one of your legs high on his hip, then the other, your heels resting at the small of his back. You can feel the splay of muscle under your calves work as he does an experimental roll of his hips, the angle putting pressure on your clit, pulling a moan from your throat at the pleasure. 

“You feel so good,” his voice is breathy. “So fucking perfect.” He’s thrusting slowly, and you can tell he’s holding himself back, his face ending up in the crook of your neck. “You’re so fucking perfect and beautiful.” He groans, and the sound makes you clench, him pausing with a hiss. “Shit, don’t do that, or this will end quickly.” 

“Sorry,” you mumble.

“It’s okay.” He kisses your cheek. “Fuck, when you come, you’re probably taking me with you.” 

That has a thrill rolling through you. 

He starts back up again, going slow, languid, feeling every ridge and vein on his cock as it presses into spots of bliss you weren’t even aware existed—the beginning of an orgasm is starting to take shape in your center, your toes curled up tight and needing more to get yourself there.

“Faster,” you say.  

Gradually, he picks up speed until there’s a wet slap of skin against skin, and he’s grunting in your ear, his thrusts steady, hard, and fast, the muscles in your belly tightening. All you can do is hang onto his shoulders, your mouth open as his name spills from it in gasping moans, chanting it over and over again. He’s pushing in so deep you’re sure he’s rearranging your guts in order to make himself fit.

His dick is moving in and out of you at a punishing pace, flooding your system with pleasure, unable to think about anything else except how you’re being wrecked by the man above you. 

In the mirror on the ceiling, you can see him fucking you—the way the muscles in his back are moving just under his golden skin, the glistening layer of perspiration shining in the light, the redness on his shoulders from your nails scratching at them, and add in the sounds—the rhythmic bang of his headboard hitting the wall, the mattress springs squeaking beneath you both, the wet suck of him working his cock in and out of your pussy, his rough noises, and your softer ones; it’s all utterly obscene and rocketing you toward your release with how it turns you on. 

One time, and you’re addicted. 

You want Javi to show you more—try out different positions and teach you new things, wanting to make him feel as good as he’s making you feel right this second. This has awakened something in you that’s hungry, and you want to feed it. 

His strong arm wraps around your back, and you squeak in surprise when he rolls you both so you’re on top, keeping himself buried to the hilt in your sopping cunt. Your knees are bracketing his hips, hands on his chest for leverage, and Javi doesn’t make you think about what you need to do; his large palms grab your ass, using his strength to work you up and down his slick cock. 

Somehow, he’s deeper like this, your mouth falling open, and helping him by rising and falling on your own as you keen. 

Sweat is coating both of you, seeing drops caught in Javi’s happy trail, loving the flush that starts on his chest and moves up his neck to his cheeks, the flexed muscles in his arms defined—from the look on his face you’d think he’s in pain, his eyes glazed over in lust and shifting between watching you ride him and looking up at the mirror. It gives you the idea to lean back and hold yourself up with your hands on his thighs to give him a better view as you bounce in his lap. 

“Fuck,” he groans. “You’re fucking gorgeous taking my dick so well,” he says the words through panted breaths. Your climax is near, getting closer and closer with every deep kiss of his cock inside you. “Are you gonna come for me? Are you gonna let me feel you come around my dick? You gonna take me with you? Come on, Florecita, give it to me.” 

His calloused thumb circles your clit so perfectly that it has you falling over the edge, coming with a loud moan of his name, laying forward onto him. Your inner walls tighten around him, hearing Javi groan, euphoria exploding out from your core to spread to your limbs, your mind going blissfully blank. 

Javier firmly grips your ass, grunting as his hips thrust upwards frantically to chase his own high. 

He says something you don’t register, a sharp slap to your asscheek quickly following to get your attention. 

“What?” you ask. 

“Gonna come,” he says through his teeth. “Need you to get off.” 

That made little sense to you since you discussed how you’re on the pill. 

“Come inside me.” 

A pained noise leaves him, his rhythm stuttering. “Fuck, are you sure?” 

“Yes, come inside me, Javi.” 

His orgasm must catch him off guard with how long and strained his moan is as he comes, his hands pulling you down hard and flush against him—it surprising you how you’re able to feel his cock thicken and jerk, the hot spurts of his spend filling and coating your inner depths. 

His chest is rising and falling hard beneath you, welcoming his arms that hug you close to his body, your face tucked into his neck and content on where you’re at, not wanting to move—with how your arms and legs feel like they’re made of Jell-O, there’s a chance you couldn’t move if you wanted to.

There’s no way your first time could've been better—it was perfect. 

Minutes pass as you both share in the relaxing post-coital bliss, your hand ending up in his hair where you play with the sweat-damp strands, Javi humming appreciatively. 

“How was it?” he finally asks, his voice rough. 

“Amazing,” you reply, not sounding any better.

His head turns, kissing your forehead. “Yeah?” 

“Oh, yeah. How long before you’re able to go again…?” 

A huff of air leaves his nose. “Am I in for a long night, Florecita?” 

“You’re in for a long weekend, Javier.” 

“One time, and you’re fucking insatiable,” he chuckles. 

“The one time was life-changing, and I want you to show me all the things I’ve been missing out on.” 

“Your pussy is probably gonna be sore tomorrow, and you won’t want me touching it.” 

There’s already an ache. 

“True, so tomorrow we can go over the art of sucking your dick and hand jobs?” 

He sounds amused, “We can do that, and I’ll make you breakfast.” 

“Yes, I’ve gotta have that breakfast.” 

“And I want to take you out to dinner.” 

It takes you a second to process what he said.

“Like on a date?” 

“Yes, Florecita. I want to take you out on a proper date.” 

Moving your face over his to meet his eyes, you reply, “Where will you take me so nobody from work will see us?” 

His hands rub over your back. 

“I know some places only locals go to. I can also take you to a different city if that will make you feel better.” 

“I trust you.”

A serious look came over his face, his hand coming up to slide along your cheek. 

“I’m really fucking busy with work,” he says. 

“I’m intimately aware.” 

He nods, sighing. “I don’t know if I’ll be any good at being your boyfriend.” 

“Are you gonna cheat on me?” 

He looks offended. “What? No. If I’m with someone, I’m with them and them only.” 

“That’s good. When you’re not busy with work, will you want to spend time with me?” 

“Even when I'm working, I want to spend time with you.” 

“You’re so sweet,” you reply, pecking him on the tip of his nose. “I know you’re a busy man, Javi. The way I imagined this going down is we’d spend time together on lunches and breaks at work. I can either keep you company and rack up overtime at the office when you stay late, or we can come here for you to continue working, and I’ll do my best not to distract you.” 

There’s a curious expression on his face. “How would you distract me?” 

“I don’t know, maybe walk around your apartment in little to no clothing?” 

He wet his bottom lip. “I think I’ll start working after hours at home more…” 

His horniness makes you laugh. “You’re adorable. Then, on the rare occasions you actually have a night or day off, we’ll do stuff.” 

“It’s not gonna bother you we won’t have a traditional relationship?” 

“I’ve never been in one, so no,” you answer with a shrug. “I mean, we already spend basically all of our time together; this just changes our dynamic and means I can kiss you whenever I want.” 

He smiles. “Yes, you can.” His hand gently pulls you down for a kiss. Separating after some seconds, he says, “We need to get you cleaned up.” 

“Right.” You also needed to empty your bladder since that was important after sex. 

“There’s a huge fucking tub in my bathroom, so I’ll run us a bath, and afterward, I want you to drink some water and have a snack.”

“It’s surprising to me you have food here. I honestly thought you survived on coffee and cigarettes.” 

A sigh leaves him. “I usually remember to eat breakfast and dinner… The people who clean this place also buy my groceries, so yeah, I’ve got food here. I’ll make you something to eat.” 

“That’s very sweet of you,” you reply, kissing him briefly. “Thank you.” 

“And I’ll give you a tour—there’s not much, but I’ll show you everything.”

“I’d love that,” you say with a smile. 

“Then you can tell me what you want to do next.”

“I wanna rub your back.” With how tense he always is and the sounds he makes getting out of chairs, you know it has to bother him. 

His eyes get bigger. “Okay.”

“Work out some of that tension, and after, if you’re up for it, there’s this position I saw in a dirty movie where the woman was on her hands and knees, and the guy was just really giving it to her from behind and spanking her, and I wanna know what that’s like.” 

He’s staring blankly at you like his brain has stopped working. 

“Javi?”

It gets his attention. 

“When my job’s finished down here?” he says. 

“Yeah…?”

His hands cradle your face, his eyes staring deeply into yours. 

“I want you to come home with me, back to the States.” You didn’t expect him to say that. “I’ve had you by my side for months,” he continues, “and now that we’re together, I don’t want to go home without you.”  

“We just started dating…” 

“And I already know I’m going to marry you.” 

Masterlist

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[omgwhatchloe]

REASONS WHY HAVING SOME RDR2 CHARACTERS AS YOUR PASSENGER IN YOUR CAR SUCKS:

Charles: Only talks to points out every single animal he sees. Other than that, it’s just silence unless you start the conversation or you’re Arthur. Oh but trust me, he wants the AUX. He’s just not gunna ask.

John: Either demands the AUX cord or just connects it anyway, then proceeds to be musically inconsiderate with what he plays. You despise this song with every ounce of your being? Too bad. This song reminds you of your lowest point? Suck it up buttercup. This was playing in the car when you crashed and killed the person in the passenger seat? Womp womp.

Dutch: Seems to think it’s his car. In fact, he feels completely free to change the music, turns up the heat as much as he pleases, winds the windows up and down, moves his seat constantly etc etc.

Reverend Swanson and Mary-Beth: Car sick. So very car sick. Your two options when driving them anywhere is the sound of heavy breathing with the sounds of the highway being blasted in through the open window, or bags rustling with the sound of puking and groaning. Trust me, they’d rather have walked as well.

Javier: Awful navigator. It’s fine when you know where you’re going, but absolutely awful when you need navigation. Half the time, you look over and he’s gone off the navigation app and is playing subway surfers and texting. The other half of the time, he’s misreading the directions then yelling at YOU. Not to mention it’s completely unsurprising to wonder why you’ve been driving for so long then find he’s clicked on the entire wrong destination without a second thought.

Sean: Acts like he’s never eaten before in his life as soon as he gets into the car. Sees a Wendy’s? He’s suddenly starving. Burger King? He hasn’t eaten in three days. KFC? He’ll pay you back, he swears! In fact, the man has absolutely no problem being late for anything if you stop for food. You could be on the way to Davey’s funeral, already running late and suddenly pull into the Krispy Kreme carpark and you would not hear a single protest from him.

Micah: Yaps a whole lot of waffle about how he’s all this n all that to the point you don’t even know what he’s saying anymore and neither does he. Also enjoys flipping random people off and yelling shit out of the window. Expect to be chased by an angry driver for at least 12 miles.

Bill: Eats and then just throws his trash on the floor without a single second thought. If you ask him to pick it up, he will, but not without angrily grumbling and snatching it up. Is in a bad mood for about 2 minutes before he realises he wants to yap so does.

Karen, Uncle, Abigail and Sean: Distracts the driver. Whether it’s with yapping or loud videos or drinking or messing with the music volume, they somehow keep it up from the start of the drive right to the end.

Hosea: Puts his feet up and puts his seat back like he’s in bed. Just won’t sit normally. Will give you a ‘look’ when you ask him to put them down.

Lenny: Makes things awkward, because the first thing he does is comment on the dirtiness of your car then looks extremely shocked and uncomfortable at himself for saying that for about 7 seconds before pulling out his phone and facetiming Sean for the whole drive and giving you the same looks Hosea does when you try to speak to him. When not on the phone, he tends to respond with shrugs and “Okay then,” while folding him arms and staring out of the window. Seems to be in an awful mood until he’s out of the car. He hates car rides if it’s not with his favourite people.

Molly: Acts like you can’t drive. Struggling to see what’s right in front of you? Molly’s got your back! Seriously, she will yell at you to stop at the red light you had already seen 7 seconds ago and started to slow for. Old woman crossing (while you’re already stopped)? She will yell at you not to go so loud you debate kicking her out and making her get her own car, since she knows so much.

Tilly and Strauss: Tries to get you to speed. It’s like they’ve never heard of laws before, and will insist you ‘go faster’ even though your way is blocked by other cars. It’s painfully obvious they both can’t drive and have never had to pay for gas money.

Miss Grimshaw: Absolutely disgusted by your car and wants to make that very clear. It wouldn’t be surprising if halfway through, she started to clean it herself.

Jack: Really really really wants to press that horn. You’d find it cute at first, but so goddamn annoying when your car starts honking in the middle of a busy crossing. It’s like a constant slap-fight except you’re pushing his hands away every-time they come for the horn.

Arthur: Constantly asking to pull over. He’ll casually say “stop here” as if you’re a taxi, not to mention you’re in the middle of nowhere on the highway and you really don’t understand what a stranger mission means. Commonly, you have to explain things like how you’re already an hour late and you literally do not have the room to drive that family of five that’s broken down anywhere, nor can you stop at an empty warehouse and potentially get arrested for trespassing because he wants to explore.

Kieran: Terrified when you go slightly over the speed limit. He acts like he’s in an F1 race with no seatbelt being hung out of the window.

[immaturityofthomasastruc]

IOTA Reviews: Emotion

Hey, remember Felix? You know, that minor character who is the entire reason Gabriel has all of Ladybug's other Miraculous? The writers remembered he existed more than halfway through the season.

Let's get into the eighteenth episode of Miraculous Ladybug's fifth season: Emotion

We start off with Marinette and Adrien getting ice cream, and just like last episode, right when they're about to kiss, Adrien stops at the last second. While we don't see it, it's heavily implied that Gabriel is behind this. It turns out that Adrien has to get ready for some dance for rich people. While it has a name and I think it was mentioned in a few earlier episodes this season, it's really just some dance for rich people, so I don't care enough to remember it. Of course, all of the rich characters we know are invited, like Kagami, Chloe, Zoe, and Prince Ali. Lila, on the other hand, wasn't invited. This might sound important, but nothing happens with her until the end.

Zoe isn't going because of the “character development” she's gotten, so she offers to let Marinette wear her dress to the dance, which just so happens to be a masquerade ball. Tikki asks why Marinette even wants to go to this party she wasn't invited to, but all Marinette says is that it's so she can tell Adrien that she didn't have to keep the dance a secret from her. Why didn't Marinette just call Adrien? Because then we wouldn't have a story.

At the ball, Adrien and Kagami are the king and queen or whatever because their parents are really determined to make their ship sail even though the two show no real interest in each other (insert your own joke about the writers here), but they're interrupted by Amelie, Emilie's twin sister and Felix's mom. She's worried because her son has been missing for weeks, but Gabriel couldn't care less about the little twerp.

At the party, we get a somewhat amusing joke where Chloe fails to recognize Marinette under her mask, where Marinette not only says her name is Zoe, but her “underling” is named Chloe too. But speaking of...

Chloe: How rich are your parents? Rich? Very rich? Immensely rich? Of course, otherwise you wouldn't be here! It's too bad we can't bring out underlings with us. I'm sure these tin cans can serve properly but we can't make fun of them! (grabs a drink from a butler robot before kicking it) So lame!

Okay, did the writers just stop caring about writing convincing dialogue for Chloe? This is a problem I've noticed a lot this season. Yeah, Chloe was bad in the last four seasons, but here, she constantly talks about how Sabrina is her “underling” (Passion), or how she finds Marinete's suffering to be amusing (Derision). It's not really out of character, but it's weird how she's so much more blunt when it comes to boasting about how full of herself she is. It feels like a lot of her lines this season were meant to be placeholders for stuff the writers thought they'd change later, but then they decided to keep it in anyway. And of course to show how stuck up the other rich kids saying the same kind of stuff Chloe normally says, which is somehow less subtle social commentary than Hop Pop shouting “EAT THE RICH!”.

Adrien and Kagami talk about how they're expected to follow orders, while pretty much saying that Kagami is a Sentimonster since the camera really wants to show off her ring.

Oh wow. what does this mean? Wow, this is such a compelling mystery with so many twists and turns. I am so very invested right now.

However, as the two talk, it's clear that Adrien isn't himself, literally.

“Adrien”: Let's leave, I dare you.

Kagami: Are you insane? We can't do that.

“Adrien”: Of course, we can. I can.

Kagami: (gasps) You'd do that?

“Adrien”: Wanna bet?

Kagami: No, we can't.

“Adrien”: See? You're not as free as you claim. Don't you think we should be able to decide our future?

I'll get back to this later.

Marinette tells “Adrien” that she loves her, but Chloe figures out that Marinette crashed a party she wasn't invited to. Of course, because this is Chloe, we're supposed to ignore how unnecessary this plan was for Marinette. Seriously, Marinette crashing the party in “Gabriel Agreste”, as illogical as it was, made sense, because they needed to stop Chloe from showing Gabriel incriminating footage of Marinette. Here, Marinette had no real reason to crash this party when all she had to do was call Adrien, and Chloe, like her or hate her, makes a good point in that she wasn't invited. But again, since this is Season 5 Chloe, she could say she opposes human trafficking, and the writers would still find a way to make her look like the bad guy.

Chloe tells the other rich kids to help her expose Marinette, but because they're so stuck up and entitled, they refuse to touch her. I'll give you all a moment to groan from that unfunny joke. Then we get this conversation between Marinette and “Adrien”.

“Adrien”: All eyes are on you.

Marinette: They're looking at me like I'm a monster.

“Adrien”: Look closer, Marinette. (whispers into her ear) They're the monsters.

I officially take back everything bad I ever said about the Canto Bight scenes from The Last Jedi.

While I get what the episode's going for, we really haven't seen a lot of the 1% doing things that would actually warrant this level of scorn from the audience. Yeah, most of them were egotistical snobs, especially Chloe, but you can't really see this as a shot at the elite when it's aimed at their children instead of their parents. All we've seen in this episode is the rich kids being jerks (and even then, it's played for laughs), Chloe rightfully trying to get Marinette thrown out of a party she had no reason to crash, and Gabriel and Tomoe trying to pair their children together. If you want to show the audience how bad rich people are, you need to show them actually abusing their power and mistreating others. As bad as the aforementioned Canto Bight scenes were, they still worked because it managed to back up the point it was trying to make.

Compare this to characters like the Ferengi from Star Trek or the World Nobles from One Piece. These are allegories for the 1% that work because they do a better job at exaggerating aspects of them that can translate to how we see the elite in our world. With the Ferengi, they represent everything wrong with cutthroat businessmen who base their entire society over financial gains, and with the World Nobles, they represent the disconnect with the common people by being so arrogant, they wear helmets that prevent them from breathing the same air as the commoners. If you wanted to show how bad the rich were, especially considering what's going to happen in a few minutes, you needed to do more to make the audience not like them so we'd be more happy to see them get their comeuppance.

Marinette figures out that Felix impersonated Adrien once again (it honestly stops being impressive when he's done it during literally every episode he appears in), and he decides to transform using the Peacock Miraculous in public for some reason, calling himself Argos.

Argos' design is okay. The suit and coattails look pretty nice, and the coloring on his face works a lot better than Gabriel's. The only problem I have is the way the hood looks. It looks too goofy to go with the rest of the suit. It kind of reminds me of that salmon suit Squidward wore in that one episode of SpongeBob SquarePants.

Before anyone else at the party can do anything, Argos reveals a Sentimonster he created, Red Moon.

Red Moon is... a red moon. It's just a red moon that floats above the city, and it gives Argos the ability to make anyone bathed in its light disappear with a snap of his fingers. If anything, this shows how overpowered the Peacock Miraculous is, and that Gabriel was a real idiot for not trying anything like this while he was Shadowmoth.

Anyway, after making everyone think his cousin is a supervillain as part of his brilliant plan, Argos decides to tell everyone in the room about what his Sentimonster can do. He demonstrates this by, of course, choosing to snap away Chloe before targeting Gabriel and Tomoe. You really have your priorities straight, buddy. Argos then carries Marinette outside before throwing her in a dumpster, because if he snapped her away, than Ladybug couldn't fight him.

But then Argos decides to go to the streets, and decides to snap away a bunch of innocent civilians... while singing a jazz song. To anyone curious as to what it sounds like, I must warn you, it isn't for the feint of heart.

I take back everything bad I ever said about the Hawkmoth rap.

First off, I'm just going to say it, Bryce Papenbrook cannot sing. Argos is clearly trying to sound like a suave and confident villain like Doctor Facilier from The Princess and the Frog, but his delivery is terrible. It either ranges from flat monotone to trying to shout while dealing with a sore throat. The point I'm trying to make is that there was a good reason someone else did the singing voice for Adrien in the recent movie.

Second, this doesn't do anything to make us root for Argos as a character, because there's no reason for him to be doing this. I can understand why he'd use his power to get rid of Gabriel and Tomoe (even Chloe, given we know how much she's done), but why is he suddenly going nuts snapping a bunch of random people who haven't even met him before? The episode tries to make him a character who only does bad things because he has no choice to, so him doing this to a bunch of innocent civilians makes no sense.

Finally, WHY THE HELL IS THIS SCENE A MUSICAL NUMBER?! It's hard enough to see Argos callously wipe out a bunch of bystanders, essentially committing genocide, but the tone of the song is all upbeat and cheery, while the lyrics are about how Argos should get whatever he wants. What is the purpose of adding a song here? Are we supposed to find this funny? Is it meant to establish Felix as a wild card? Is the song supposed to make us like him more because of how catchy it is? What was the writers' endgame here? Like I mentioned earlier, this flies in the face of the characterization the episode is trying to establish for him.

Marinette transforms into Ladybug and arrives on the scene, confronting Argos over what he did last season.

Ladybug: You're the reason why I lost the other Miraculous in the first place! And why he took them! You gave them to him without any regard for the consequences it might have with the people of Paris!

Argos: True, except I work for no one. I only helped Monarch cause it served my plans! I needed the Peacock Miraculous and today I need yours and Cat Noir's so I can make my wish!

Ladybug: Your wish?! What do you want?! What are you trying to do?! You're destroying the world and we don't even know why!

Argos: When I merge your Miraculous together, I'll make a wish to create a better world! A free world, where no one will be under anyone's control anymore, where no one will be excluded like I was! A world without people like you to decide what's right or wrong! Who gets powers and who doesn't!

Dude, you're literally playing God right now by snapping away people who did nothing wrong, while singing a song at that. You have no right to lecture Ladybug on how to use power responsibly. And once again, even though we just saw him happily snapping people out of existence like the kid from that one Twilight Zone episode, the episode is going back to portraying him as someone who's only doing this because he has nothing to lose.

Ladybug tries to use her Lucky Charm, but gets nothing in response. This is because her plan is to get Argos to give up, but even in episodes where her plan was to get Akumas to give up, she still got her Lucky Charm (Rocketear, Qilin, Penalteam, Reunion, Perfection, Intuition), so this doesn't really make any sense. Ladybug calls Argos' bluff, so he wipes out everyone from existence. After running into Kagami and snapping Adrien back into existence, Argos is surprised that they aren't thanking him for wiping out all of humanity, and in fact, see him as a complete psychopath.

We then learn Felix's true plan. Earlier that day, Argos capitalized on a opening he had been hoping he would get for weeks, and then created Red Moon. Right after Adrien's date with Marinette, Argos ambushed Adrien, and snapped him out of existence with Red Moon's power. He then decided to impersonate Adrien so he could infiltrate the dance and snap Gabriel, Tomoe, and everyone else out of existence.

I think my feelings on this plan can be perfectly summarized by Tony Stark.

First off, why did he need to sneak into the dance? All Felix had to do was transform into Argos, and nobody would know who he really was.

Second, why did he need to impersonate Adrien? Felix claims he's doing this for him, yet all he did was steal his girlfriend and ruin his public reputation. As a matter of fact, why did he even snap Adrien away? You're already wiping out all of humanity, so I don't think temporarily doing the same to Adrien will earn you any goodwill.

Third, why did he waste so much time screwing around with Marinette and Kagami? I sort of get why he would try to get in Kagami's good graces (keyword being “try”) by trying to convince her to rebel against her mother more, but why did he dance around with Marinette while pretending to be Adrien? Felix later says he wanted to spare Marinette for Adrien's sake, but he barely knows her, and whether she finds out Felix impersonated her boyfriend or not, she's going to be pissed at either you or Adrien because of your galavanting. In fact, I don't think he ever told Adrien that he danced with Marinette while at the dance in the first place.

Finally, he really needed to wait for this for weeks? If your goal was to get rid of Gabriel and Tomoe, why didn't you just ambush them yourself instead of waiting for a public function? This isn't like has last few appearances where he needed to rely on his intellect. He has superpowers now. All he has to do is create another Sentibug or some kind of assassin Sentimonster and he can be rid of them easily. Instead, he waited weeks for a chance to steal his cousin's identity, dance with his girlfriend, talk trash about Kagami for listening to her mother when he's supposed to be helping her and Adrien, blow his cover in a crowded area by transforming, and use his killer moon to erase all of humanity from existence while singing. Remember, this is the show that usually makes jokes about Marinette's obsession with unnecessarily complicated plans.

Anyway, Argos tries to use his powers to bring Marinette back, but for some reason, they won't work. My best guess is that it's because Marinette transformed into Ladybug, but that shouldn't chance the fact that Argos snapped her with Red Moon's power. After trying to justify his genocide by saying he never wanted to hurt Adrien and Kagami, Argos remembers how his powers work and brings everyone back. After Ladybug lets him go scot-free, Argos goes to a private place realizes that he may have made a few mistakes for almost wiping out all of humanity, tearfully snapping Red Moon out of existence, calling it “his sister”. Because I guess we were supposed to emotionally connect to the giant moon that showed little to no signs of sentience this entire episode? Argos transforms back to Felix, and we learn that Amelie knew where he was the whole time, and she was apparently testing Gabriel for some reason.

After Adrien explains to Marinette that his father ordered him to not tell her about the dance, Adrien goes to talk to Gabriel about it. Gabriel, being Gabriel uses his control over Adrien to force him to never talk about Marinette again. Gabriel then gets a call from Lila, and even though she's been nothing but helpful to him since Season 3, he's apparently tired with her. Why is he suddenly rejecting the help of his most competent (by comparison) ally?

Also, the episode ends with the revelation that Lila somehow knows Gabriel is Monarch. Why? How? I DON'T CARE, BECAUSE THIS EPISODE SUCKS!

Oh my God, this episode was just terrible! “Derision” and “Adoration” definitely got to me with the way their stories were handled, but this was the first episode in a while to really piss me off. The plot was contrived as hell, basically being a repeat of “Gabriel Agreste”, and you all know how I wasn't exactly a fan of that episode. Think about it: Marinette sneaks into a party, Felix tries to scheme against Gabriel, and Marinette and Adrien end up getting caught in one of his schemes.

The social commentary about how bad the rich were just felt more pretensions than anything else. I get that it's meant to teach children a lesson about the real world, but the episode feels so confident in what its trying to say when it's not that deep, even by kids' show standards. Rich people are bad? Yeah, I think someone like me who lives in the same country as Elon Musk, Jeff Bezos, and Mark Zuckerberg knows that. Will you actually teach kids about the financial conditions that allow the wealthy to abuse their power or the cutthroat methods they'll resort to in order to turn a profit? No? You're just going to tell kids that rich people are jerks without giving any actual evidence in the same episode you're using to try and to teach them? Man, these writers just keep hitting it out of the park here!

This whole “Rich people suck” message also falls flat because Felix is the one pushing it. You know, someone who already comes from a rich family? It's not like Bruce Wayne where he uses his money to help the people of Gotham, as Batman or not. Felix just whines about how “tHeY'rE tHe MoNsTeRs.” when he's just as well-off as they are. The episode tries to do a subtle discrimination message as evidenced by his rant as Argos earlier, but it doesn't work because we have never seen anyone discriminate against Felix for who he is. Yeah, the episode once again tries to hint at him being a Sentimonster, but because the show hasn't just pulled the trigger and confirmed it, it's hard to really sympathize with him being “excluded” when we've never seen him being treated differently by others in earlier episodes, and even if he was a Sentimonster, nobody would know or be able to discriminate against him in the first place.

I don't know why the show keeps trying to excuse Felix's actions when once again, he pretty much committed fucking genocide yet the episode still wanted us to feel bad for him realizing his actions had consequences. If he actually wanted to own up to his mistakes, he'd either hand over the Peacock Miraculous to Ladybug or help Ladybug stop Monarch. For someone who claims he hates when people abuse power to make others suffer, he's no better, judging from how both times he's gotten to use a Miraculous, he's either screwed over Ladybug (Strikeback) or endangered a lot of innocent people. And if you're wondering why I didn't point out any double standards between the treatment of Felix compared to Chloe, that doesn't really matter. No matter how you feel about Chloe, whether you feel like she got screwed over or not, it doesn't really make how the writers are glorifying Felix any better or worse, as his potential “redemption arc” isn't off to a good start.

The plot was stupid, Felix was an idiot, and it felt like more effort was put into the musical number than the writing. In my opinion, this is easily the worst episode of the season so far.

Although at the very least, now that we have even more evidence that Adrien, Felix, and even Kagami are all Sentimonsters, I think I know what clip I can start using to describe my feelings on this plotline.

THE BIGGEST IDIOT OF THE EPISODE IS... FELIX

For someone who managed to outsmart Gabriel on multiple occasions with no superpowers, Felix's intelligence really took a nosedive the second he got the Peacock Miraculous. He came up with a completely unnecessary plan that involved impersonating his cousin's identity and mocking his friend when he's supposed to try and win their favor, he danced with his cousin's girlfriend without his consent, transformed in public, smearing his reputation even further, and proceeded to gleefully wipe out humanity through a musical number, and needed other people to point out how immoral his actions were. Of course, Marinette gets second place thanks to her plan to break into the party and later letting Argos get away.

[just-come-baek]

under the rose

Pairing: Joshua Hong x female!reader

Themes: 18+ smut | fluff | childhood frenemies to lovers!au | kinda historical!au (no specific time, but it’s not modern, like idk maybe 1950?)

Word count: 6k

Summary: You’ve known Joshua your entire life, and it has always irked you when he got praised for the same things you were scolded for. You hate these societal double standards thrown upon you almost as much as people who judge you for it. Thankfully, you have Joshua, who just gets you.

in other words...

They fuck on the blanket by the lake.

Warnings: mentions of patriarchy | mentions of feminism | reader often calls Joshua Jisoo and it annoys him | other teasing | making out | butt slapping | dry humping | hand job | dirty talk | Joshua has a big dick! | unprotected sex (think about consequences!) | first time | creampie 

A/N idk what got into me

Although summer was officially gone, Mother Nature still spoilt people with sunny days and warm nights. Plants and trees all over the area were still in full bloom, letting the locals and tourists admire the beautiful landscapes.

The windows of your bedroom were facing the east. The bright rays of sunshine woke you up as soon as the sun rose over the crown of trees. With a smile, you stretched your limbs, happy to start your day.

Quickly, you opened the window, letting fresh air into your bedroom.

Enjoying the slight breeze, you walked over to your massive closet. You had no plans for today, nor you knew what to wear to celebrate this beautiful day. Too bad you weren’t allowed to leave the house in your satin sleeping gown. It was the most comfortable thing you owned. You didn’t give a fuck that men could find it scandalous or indecent.

You were always told not to provoke men as if it was your fault they couldn’t control themselves. It was incorrect reasoning, but for your mother’s sake, you decided not to speak your mind as openly as your heart desired. After all, these men weren’t ready to hear what the root of the problem was.

You tapped your chin in thought as you skimmed through your outfit choices, ultimately deciding to put on a cute summer dress that should appease your conservative mother. It was an A-frame white dress with little yellow flowers embroiled into the fabric. (Your mother insisted they were yellow roses, but to you, they looked more like daffodils.) It had cute tulip sleeves and a bodice – it didn’t offer a lot of support for your breasts, but at least it covered your nipples and fooled your mother into thinking you were wearing a bra underneath it. Carefully, you did the half-shank buttons that trailed up your sternum and tied a golden ribbon around your waist to accentuate your figure.

You looked like a prude, but despite all of that, you felt pretty.

Maybe a little bit of blush and lipstick could spice up your cute but upright look, you wondered as you rummaged through the drawer of your vanity. As it was officially autumn, so you decided to go with an orange palette, trying to match shades with your complexion.

Admittedly, it added a sexy edge to your overall look. Now, you only hoped your mother wouldn’t tell you to wash it off as it was inappropriate for such a virtuous young lady she thought you were.

You didn’t put much effort into your hair; you brushed out all of the tangles and put on a headband. That was it. The wind would ruin your hair anyway if you tried properly styling it.

“Good morning,” you said to your mother as you walked downstairs for breakfast. She was drinking her morning tea as she glanced at you, trying to find flaws in your appearance and expurgate them.

When she didn’t say anything to put you down, you figured you passed her censorship test today. Good, because you didn’t even try to anger her, you just wanted to enjoy yourself outside.

“Good morning, honey,” she said as you sat down by the table opposite of her. Smiling, you reached for the bread and spread raspberry jam over it. “Joshua came by earlier. He’s such a nice boy. He asked you to meet him by the lake. Of course, I said you’d join him,” she announced, and you nearly dropped your knife upon hearing his name.

Joshua Hong was your mother’s best friend’s son, and your mom sometimes (always) acted as if she loved him more than she did you. Whenever you had guests over, she would go out of her way to brief them on his whereabouts and eulogize him at every given chance.

Joshua always accompanies his mother to church. Joshua graduated at the top of his class. Joshua rescued a dozen of puppies from drowning.

You were sick and tired of her Joshua this, Joshua that. If only she knew what he was like when mothers couldn’t see him... You were basically the same age, so you hung out with him quite often throughout your childhood and adolescence. Although unwillingly, you knew him inside out, and he most definitely did not fit your mother’s description.

“Thank you,” you finally said, offering her an unconvincing smile. “I’m dying to see him. It’s been too long,” you added, your voice full of sarcasm (which your mother thankfully did not pick up on). Smiling, you stuffed your mouth with the toast as you wanted to be done with breakfast quickly. You could only stop yourself from giving mean comments for just a while, and you didn’t want to upset your mother with your point of view on Joshua’s behavior.

“It’s nice to see you so eager to see him,” she beamed, incorrectly reading your intentions.

“Right…” you said, pouring juice down your throat. “I should get going. It would be rude of me to keep him waiting,” you added with a fake smile spread across your face. Your mother must’ve found your considering tone a bit strange, but she ultimately decided to believe that you grew up.

“Joshua is such a gentleman. There are so few of them nowadays,” she carried on, and you rolled your eyes at her comment. Your mother could read people like a book, and you still didn’t know how Joshua managed to fool her.

Having sat on the bottom of the stairs, you put on your shoes, carefully tying the shoelaces.

“Wear the nice ones,” your mother commented as she picked up your everyday muddy shoe and threw them back onto the shoe rack. You didn’t want to argue with her, so you listened to her, knowing your feet were going to hate you in the evening. Maybe the pumps were pretty, but it wasn’t the footwear of your choice. It was impractical. Joshua was waiting for you by the lake. That’s about thirty minutes away on foot from your house.

“I shall be back for dinner,” you said, even though you were going to return much sooner. Even if Joshua wanted to see you and talk to you, it was one-sided. You’d just go there and tell him to go home and stop bothering you.

You loved being outside. As soon as you set foot on the porch, rays of sunshine hit your face, making you smile in content. Despite Joshua’s short visit and request, it was going to be a beautiful day.

Slowly, you strolled towards the lake, humming to yourself as you mentally tried to plan the rest of the day. You could pick some flowers for the vase that was sitting on your nightstand as the old bouquet of white camellias started to wither. Then, maybe you could go to the swing set and watch the sunset.

It sounded like a good idea.

You felt pain in your heels. Cursing under your breath, you hoped you didn’t get blisters.

Finally, you reached the lake. Joshua was waiting for you by the pier, holding a paddle. As much as you hated to admit it, he looked hot in his white shirt. Three top buttons were undone, showing a lot of his neck, collarbones and chest, while his sleeves were rolled up all the way to his elbows. His light brown trousers, black shoes, and matching suspenders looked great on him.

“Took you long enough, love,” Joshua greeted you, sending you a bright, genuine smile. “Don’t you look beautiful today,” he added, carefully studying you from head to toe. His sight was definitely better than your mother’s – Joshua instantly picked up on the absence of your bra, what made him shamelessly smirk.

“What do you want, Jisoo?” You asked, cocking up your eyebrow. You hated when he referred to you per love, so you also decided to rile him up by using his Korean name. You were the only one who had the balls to call him that – ever since childhood he hated it when people did that. “Your early visit got my mom unreasonably excited. I wouldn’t be too surprised if she already started planning our wedding,” you deadpanned.

“You should be happy. I’m quite a catch,” Joshua replied, smugly smiling at you.

“Ew,” you commented, turning your face in disgust. “You better talk to my mother and undo it. I wouldn’t marry you even if you were the last man on Earth,” you demanded, hating the way Joshua’s insignificant actions had huge impact on your life. You weren’t going to suffer the consequences of his shenanigans.

Instead of giving you a reply, Joshua sighed and shrugged his shoulders, tilting his head to the side.

“I meant no harm. I just wanted to ask you to come here and boat with me,” Joshua said, pointing at the small wooden boat tied to the post on the pier. “We used to do it a lot when we were children.”

You hummed, reminiscing. It really was your tradition. Every summer you could come here and have a lot of fun. Usually, one of you ended up in water, almost drowning. (Nine out of ten times it was you, since Joshua was a sore loser and didn’t know how to treat you like a lady.)

“Fine, but if you try to push me into water, I’m dragging you down with me,” you warned him before you marched past him in a straight lane to the pier.

“Ladies first,” Joshua replied with a wide grin as he tried to catch up with you.

Carefully, you got on the boat and took a seat at the front. You figured if it was Joshua’s idea, he would sit at the back and do all the paddling. After all, you were a lady, and everyone would frown upon seeing you do such a manly labor…

Smiling at you, Joshua rowed the boat to the middle of the lake.

When he had his mouth shut, it was rather peaceful. You could feel the sun and wind on your cheeks as you close your eyes, allowing yourself to enjoy the last bits of warm weather. The sound of water and faint chips of birds echoed in your ears. Admittedly, the little boat trip felt nice – until Joshua decided to interrupt the soothing silence with his annoying voice.

“Why do you hate me so much? Is it something I have done?” Joshua asked as he tossed the paddles to the side beside your legs.

“I just do,” you replied, having no intention to elaborate. It’s just the way you felt – you didn’t owe him any explanation. Joshua needed to understand it and leave you alone.

“We both know it’s not true,” Joshua egged you on, and you rolled your eyes, regretting meeting him today. Too bad Joshua began that topic only when you were stranded on a boat with him in the middle of the lake.

Maybe it was a lie, but you were never going to admit it. You didn’t hate him – you hated that he got praised and applauded for things you always ended up getting reprimanded for. No matter what you did – you were always judged and put down. And if Joshua did it – he was a noble gentleman.

“Come on, love,” he urged you, nudging your knee with his. “Talk to me. Let me fix everything.”

Although you knew he meant no harm, his words riled you up even more.

“That’s the problem,” you sighed, looking away. “I don’t want you to do anything. Even if you tried, you would make everything worse,” you concluded, realizing no matter how charming Joshua could get, he had no power to solve the societal problems you often fell victim to.

You remembered the one time you went hunting with Joshua and Jeonghan. At first, your mom hated the idea, but Joshua somehow convinced her it was safe for you to accompany them. Needless to say, you shot down three pheasants while Joshua and Jeonghan none. You had no experience, yet you turned out to be better than them.

However, the real cherry on top was when you returned come for supper. Your and Joshua’s moms were ecstatic when you brought so much food home. Unfortunately, happiness turned into disappointment when you told her it was you who had hunted them. That night, not only you got scolded for engaging in a typically male activity, but also for disobeying Joshua.

Just the thought about that day made your blood boil in your veins.

Joshua seemed concerned. Whatever made you feel that way, he wanted to change it.

“Is it about Sooyoung? I’ve already told you that I don’t like her like that,” Joshua wondered out loud, even though he suspected his guess was incorrect.

“What? No! It’s not about her,” you confirmed, your voice getting louder. “I never understood you. Sooyoung is literally perfect. Every man wants to marry her,” you started, but Joshua quickly interjected you.

“I don’t,” he admitted with no hesitation in his tone. “Even if she’s perfect, she’s not you.”

Joshua’s words made you gasp in shock.

“What? Did you want me to come here to mess with me?” You asked as you stood up to lean in and flick his forehead. You were somewhat friends – such love confessions were way out of line!

“Of course not,” Joshua quickly reassured you as he grabbed your wrist, stopping you from inflicting any pain. (You have flicked Joshua’s forehead so many times throughout your friendship his skull was impenetrable at this point.) “I mean it. I love you as a friend and as a woman. Can’t you see it?” Joshua asked, staring into your soul. His lips were twisted into a genuine smile as he waited for your reaction.

Joshua Hong loved you.

His confession left you speechless. There were some signs along the way, but you decided to ignore them. It was easier that way. Even if you cared about Joshua as much as he cared about you, you still couldn’t marry him.

Everybody always told you it’s a wife’s duty to submit to her husband, yet you adamantly refused to give into that mindset. Since early childhood you were taught how to serve a man, and you hated every second of it.

If anyone ever gave you a chance, you could prove you were equal, or better than a man. Too bad no one ever treated you seriously.

Despite your feelings for Joshua, you had to reject him. As long as society considered women as lesser than men, you had no interest in marriage.

“Do you have feelings for me, too? Or am I an idiot?” Joshua continued as he pulled your wrists down gently, so you’d lean forward a bit. You were bent in an uncomfortable position as you stared into Joshua’s eyes, wondering how to phrase your rejection.

“That’s not important,” you said, and Joshua frowned, not liking the tone you set for the conversation.

“Of course, it’s important! That’s literally the only thing that matters,” Joshua argued, massaging your wrists with his thumb, hoping his gentle moves could soothe you.

“I can’t be with you. You deserve much, much more.”

“I don’t want more. I want you.”

“I can’t,” you said, your voice breaking.

“Why?”

You dreaded that question. Joshua wouldn’t understand. He’s a man, and you doubted he could see the issue from your point of view. Fuck, even your female friends didn’t get your reasoning.

“I hate it. I hate all of it,” you confessed, letting your bottled up frustrations out. “I hate the idea of marriage. I hate taking orders from people. I hate being judged for everything I do. I hate being perceived as less worthy. I’d rather become a spinster than marry. You have to understand it.”

Joshua knew you better than anyone, and he completely understood where you were coming from. He could see the despair in your eyes whenever someone made an unfair comparison to you. He could see the change in your mood when someone suggested you shouldn’t do something.

“I should be offended. I had no idea you think so lowly of me,” Joshua spoke up, his eyes avoiding you as he tried to properly word the rest of his speech. “I know you. I know you hate these things. I’d never treat you like that. I love you the way you are. You’re stubborn, independent, and fierce. There’s not a single thing I’d change about you.”

“Really?”

“Yes, really. I want you to challenge me. I want you to correct me when I’m wrong. I want you by my side wherever I go. I’ve always treated you as equal, marriage won’t change it,” Joshua said, pressing a chaste kiss against your knuckles.

His affectionate gesture shocked you. Instinctively, you yanked your hands out of his grasp and took a step back. Unfortunately, you failed to coordinate your swift movements. Due to a sudden change of weight, the boat wobbled to the sides, making you lose your footing.

You put your hands in the air, trying to find your balance, but when Joshua stood up to steady you, you tipped off the edge and fell into the cold water with a shriek.

After a few seconds, you resurfaced and coughed out water that accidentally got into your mouth and nose.

“Hong Jisoo! I hate you,” you yelled, kicking your feet in a feeble attempt to stay on the surface. Although you knew how to swim, the cold water seemed to slow down your reflexes.

“Here,” Joshua shouted as he stretched his arm, hovering over the edge to hoist you up. “Grab my hand,” he ordered, laughing at you.

“I’m going to murder you someday, Jisoo,” you warned him as you grabbed his hand and pulled him into water with you. “Maybe sooner than later,” you added when Joshua swam up to the surface and shook his head to the side, trying to get his wet hair out of his eyes.

“You little–

Joshua tried to catch you and make you regret, but you were a faster swimmer.

“Come back here,” he shouted after you, but you just laughed as you tried to distance yourself from his wrath. “I’m not kidding,” he carried on, sending a plethora of threats your way. You, on the other hand, were ignoring him as one of your legs was already hooked over the boat’s edge.

Giggling at Joshua’s antics, you waited for him to swim closer to the boat before you helped him out.

“You’ll be the death of me,” Joshua muttered, giving up the stink eye. “Let’s get back to the shore. I left there some towels and blankets.”

“You planned this, didn’t you?”

“What do you mean? I’ve known you my entire life. Every time we’re here someone ends up in the water,” Joshua concluded as he sat up and put the paddles in the hooks.

“Let me help you,” you said as you sat down beside him, yanking one paddle out of his grip. You weren’t a damsel in distress – you could prove yourself useful. Besides, you needed something to keep you warm, and paddling seemed a perfect solution to your problem.

“Your mother would kill me if she knew I let you do that,” Joshua commented as the both of you put your muscles to a good use. Quickly, you paddled to the short in great synchronization.

“You better get used to it because I intent to live my life how I want it,” you replied, laughing. “Besides, she loves you. If she had to kill any of us, it would be me.”

“Hopefully, we’ll never find out.”

As soon as Joshua tied the boat to the post, you ran uphill where he left the picnic basket under an old oak tree. Initially, he thought it would be nice to enjoy a meal after the boat ride.

Quickly, you wrapped a towel around your frame, trying to dry yourself.

“Come here,” Joshua said as he tossed his towel on your head, aggressively drying your hair.

“Stop it,” you hollered as you rolled your towel and smacked Joshua’s butt with it.

“Truce. Truce. Truce,” Joshua shouted, trying to block your attacks. “Are you still cold?” Joshua asked, staring at you fondly. You nodded, and Joshua wrapped his arms around you in a tight hug before he began rubbing your limbs, hoping friction could help you warm up.

“I hate you,” you muttered as Joshua pulled you against his chest and kissed the top of your head.

“Good girls don’t lie,” Joshua pointed out, and you rolled your eyes at his comment.

“Have I ever been good?”

“Fair enough,” Joshua chuckled, tightening his grip around your frame. “But you don’t hate me. In fact, I think you love me.”

“Thinking has never been your strong suit,” you teased, poking his chest with your forefinger.

“Doesn’t matter because you still love me,” Joshua proudly remarked, ignoring your jab.

“Jisoo–” you started, but you choked on your breath when Joshua’s hand slapped your butt. It took you by surprise – you didn’t expect Joshua to do that as well as you didn’t imagine you’d like the stinging sensation. “But you’re right. I love you, Jisoo,” you added, earning another spank on the other butt cheek. This time, Joshua applied a little bit more strength, making you stumble forward and press against his crotch.

“Hopefully, after we get married, you’ll call me by my name,” Joshua said with a sigh. Gently, he massaged your butt, holding you in your place, so you could rub yourself against his cock.

“You can try and make me,” you carelessly answered, adjusting the wet collar of his shirt. “Joshua. Joshua. Josh. Shua. Joshie,” you tried different variants, but there was something lacking in the way it rolled of your tongue. No matter how many times Joshua tried to correct you, he’d always be Jisoo to you. “See? It sounds weird. I don’t like it.”

“You’ll get used to it,” Joshua winked at you, leaning down to kiss the tip of your nose. “Are you hungry? I’ve brought some sandwiches,” he asked, pointing his head at the basket.

“Not really,” you admitted, giggling under your breath. You had a lot of fun and all the happy hormones that were cursing through your veins made you forget about hunger. Though you you’d never admit it out loud, you’d rather cuddle and kiss him.

Smiling at each other like idiots, you sat down on the blanket. Joshua had his back pressed against the tree, while you sneaked your way onto his laps.

“We’re gonna be in so much trouble if someone catches us,” Joshua commented as he looked around, hoping to not see any prying eyes.

“Worried about your gentleman reputation?” You teased as you squirmed on his laps, pressing yourself against his crotch again. Getting caught with you must’ve excited him, and you could feel the hard evidence trapped in his pants.

“Not one bit,” Joshua admitted, smirking at you. “You’re here with me, so I don’t mind.”

“Good to know,” you innocently replied, batting your eyelashes at him. “So… I’m guessing you wouldn’t mind if I did that,” you carried on as you lowered your hand and cupped his erection, stroking it gently through the fabric.

“I’ve been dreaming about it for years, love. I’m shameless, and I don’t care,” Joshua confessed, and you shied away by his straight-forward statement. “I want you to touch it and do much, much more,” he added as he placed his hand over yours to help you properly feel all of it.

“You’re a devil, Hong Jisoo,” you concluded as you leaned in, letting your breath tickle his full lips. You were maybe an inch away, waiting for him to close the distance and finally kiss you.

Staring into your eyes, Joshua cupped your cheeks and pressed his lips against yours, kissing you gently. His soft nibbles were driving you insane. Your heart was pounding against your ribcage quickly as you shut your eyes close and kissed him back, letting yourself get lost in delight.

Joshua put his hand in your hair, holding you close as he deepened the kiss, pushing your lips apart with his tongue, making you moan into his mouth. For him, it was the most sinful sound he had ever heard, and it instantly made his blood rush down to his throbbing cock.

Suddenly, Joshua flipped you both, so you were lying flat on your back on the blanket with him on top of you, trailing wet kisses down your neck, careful not to leave any marks. If your mother found them, she would kill the both of you despite your honest intentions.

“I will never get enough of you,” Joshua muttered as his mouth slowly moved towards your cleavage. “I still can’t believe your mother let you leave the house without a bra. What was she thinking?” He carried on as he glanced at your breasts, your nipples peeking through the soaked fabric.

“Can we stop talking about her? I’m sick and tired of that woman,” you snapped, feeling angry. She was your mother, but she didn’t even try to understand you. The only she could do was to punish you for your disobedience. Thankfully, you’d move out soon, giving her enough space to reflect.

“Sorry, I was just –

“It’s okay,” you smiled as you ran your hands across his chest and wrapped your legs around him. Smirking, you pushed Joshua to the side and climbed on top of him. Joshua knew you were feisty, but he never expected you to try to dominate him. Now, when he was under you, he didn’t mind you taking the lead. Admittedly, you were incredibly sexing doing so.

Staring down at him, you slowly undid the buttons of your bodice, letting your breasts fall out of it due to the lack of support. Joshua’s eyes were on you, biting his lips as he watched you in admiration.

“Every inch of you is just… breathtaking,” Joshua confessed, shamelessly staring at your breasts. They slightly bounced whenever you inhaled and exhaled, but when you grabbed and kneaded them in front of his face, he almost came in his pants. You were astoundingly erotic, and Joshua had to fight his inner urges to remain in his place.

When Joshua’s brain malfunctioned at the sight of your bare breasts, you roamed your hands across his chest and shoulders, undoing the buttons of his shirt and pushing his suspenders off his shoulders. Who knew it was that easy to shut him up and keep him busy.

Taking your sweet time, you peppered his chest with delicate kisses while your hands disappeared under the hem of his trousers. Joshua hissed the moment your hand grabbed his erection and gave it a few cautious pumps, spreading the precum across all of it.

“Do you like it when I touch you like that?” You asked, smirking at him.

“More than you can imagine,” he admitted, gently thrusting his hips upwards, needing more attention than you were currently giving him. Dreams and sexual frustration that he had accumulated through the years were making him act desperate.

“Then pull your pants down, okay?” You asked him, and Joshua eagerly raised his hips and freed his hard cock. “You’re so big,” you admitted with a gulp, wondering if he was going to fit.

“Don’t worry, love,” Joshua smiled, reassuring his dick wouldn’t break you in half no matter how hard he was to fuck you. “I’ll prepare you for it,” he added before his hand slipped under your dress. Carefully, his fingers pulled your panties to the side, allowing him access to your clit.

“Oh my,” you whispered, tilting your head to the back when you felt a pulse of electricity run through you thanks to Joshua’s fingers. The pads of his digits gently rubbed your clit and smeared your juices across your folds. “Please,” you moaned as Joshua pushed one of his fingers inside of you, curling it.

Your breaths were uneven, your back was arched as Joshua scissored you. In no time, his entire hand was drenched in your dripping essence, and it required Joshua to flick his long fingers inside of you a few times.

“Jisoo,” you breathed out, ready to welcome the pleasure that was building up in the pit of your stomach.

“That’s not what you should call me, love,” Joshua spoke, pulling his fingers away, leaving you frustrated. “Come on, it’s not that difficult,” he urged you, hoping you’d cave. After all, he wanted to finish the job and see you come on his fingers. “You can do it.”

“I seriously hate you right now, Hong Jisoo,” you stubbornly said to which Joshua decided to raise his knees, making you stumble forward against his chest. Thanks to your quick reflexes, you didn’t hit you face against Joshua’s chest.

“Do you want me to get mad?”

“Depends,” you stated with a giggle. “Do we still make love if you’re mad?”

“You’re impossible,” Joshua huffed, thinking what he should do with you.

Was it even that big of a deal? Everyone called him Joshua. You weren’t everyone – you were special. And Joshua was special to you.

“Don’t be mad,” you cooed, drawing swirly shapes on his bare chest. You knew he couldn’t resist you; it was only a matter of time for him to forgive you for the relentless teasing. “Please,” you begged as you rocked your hips, rubbing your clothed sex against Joshua’s painful erection.

“I’ll let it go just this one time,” Joshua said before he harshly pulled you down to give you a rough kiss. “You’re just asking to be punished, but I’ll let it slide for now,” he added, and you trembled. His tone was stern and domineering, you had no doubts he meant what he said.

“I want you inside of me,” you confessed as grinding against him wasn’t enough.

“Take off your dress first,” Joshua ordered as he grabbed the hem, willing to help you pull it over your head. “So you can act like a good girl… you just refuse to,” Joshua concluded as he tossed your dress on the grass next to the basket.

“I’m a good girl when I want something, and right now, I want you to fuck me,” you shamelessly admitted, not even trying to sound like a lady. You were aroused, and with Joshua’s hard cock under you, you paid no mind to proper manners.

“I should’ve figured this one out,” Joshua said under his breath as he hooked his fingers under the hem of your panties and tore them apart, getting rid of the annoying fabric that was in the way. “Since you’re so eager, why don’t you fuck yourself on me, huh?”

Joshua’s sinful words rang in your ears, making you dizzy. It was an order you were more than willing to listen.

Tentatively, you wrapped your hand around Joshua’s cock and aligned it with your entrance.

“Just like that, love,” Joshua whispered, urging you to keep going.

Stress was eating you from inside. You had no experience in sex – you just heard a few detailed stories from your married friends. Sometimes it hurt. Given Joshua’s impressive size, it was going to apply lots of pain.

“Take it slow, love. You’re going to be alright,” Joshua reassured you, reading you as if you were an open book. “There’s no rush,” he added, and you nodded, cautiously rubbing the tip of his cock across your folds.

“Oh my god,” you panted as you slowly sunk on his pulsating length.

“That’s it,” Joshua cooed, trying his best not to thrust from beneath until your walls stretched around him. Your teeth were clenched as you slowly got used to every inch of his impressive erection.

Frankly, you expected it to hurt more. You had period cramps worse than this.

“It feels nice,” you mindlessly said, feeling his cock throb inside of you.

“Only nice?” Joshua teased as he grabbed your butt and gave it a few squeezes.

“I want to ride the hell out of you,” you confessed as you started to rock your hips up and down his cock. Your rhythm was uneven, but you didn’t care. You were chasing your release, and you needed to figure out the speed and angle to make yourself come around him.

“Just like that, love. Keep going,” Joshua moaned, giving you lots of compliments to encourage you to let go and give into your primal urges. The harder you bounced on his cock, the less you could hear him say. “Fuck,” Joshua cursed as your walls began tightening around his erection as if trying to squeeze all of his release.

“I can’t, I can’t,” you groaned as the upcoming pleasure started to overwhelm you. You didn’t think you could feel this good, and your orgasm was yet to come.

“You can, and you will,” Joshua ordered as he grabbed you by your hips, holding you steady, thrusting from beneath you. You were slowly losing your stamina, and Joshua needed to help you. After all, it was your first time – it needed to be magical.

“Josh-

“That’s right, love. Come,” Joshua egged you on, smug about the slip of your tongue. You absentmindedly almost called him by his full name, and Joshua was going to remind you about all the time. (While also hoping such happy mistakes could happen more often.)

“Oh my god, Joshie, I’m coming,” you moaned at the top of your voice, knowing it was so loud people on the other side of the lake must’ve heard you. “Fuck,” you cursed as you arched your back, letting the pleasure consume you.

The way you were spasming around him pushed Joshua over the edge almost at the same time. Screaming your name, he thrust all the way in, emptying his load deep inside of you.

“I love you,” you murmured against his skin as you collapsed on his firm chest. Your mind was still a bit cloudy after reaching your peak. Gently, you drew random shapes on Joshua’s chest, trying to focus on breathing.

“I love you, too,” Joshua confessed for the nth time today, casually kissing your temple. “I could lie here all day,” he added as he pressed you closer.

“Let’s not push our luck here,” you jested as you propped on your elbow to look into his eyes. “It’s a miracle no one has caught us yet,” you carried on, looking around and hoping you and Joshua were here alone.  However, you felt so blessed right now – getting caught would be definitely worth it.

“We should make ourselves look decent,” Joshua said as he sat up, pulling out his flaccid cock out of you. His release began to ooze out of you, so he scooped it with his fingers and pushed it back inside.

“Define decent,” you challenged as you reached for your dress and threw it over your head, trying to quickly cover yourself. As long as your breasts were in his line of vision, he didn’t make any effort to cover himself. Too bad you weren’t in his bedroom. He could make love to you for hours.

“Do you have any plans for the evening?” Joshua asked when he came back to his senses.

“Why?”

Joshua just couldn’t get enough of you.

“Do you want to sneak out tonight? We could hang out or something,” Joshua offered, and you smirked, a few ideas crossing your mind. “Or maybe you want me to sneak into your bedroom? That sounds just as fun.”

“Sorry, I have plans,” you deadpanned, bursting out laughing a second later after seeing Joshua’s pouty reaction. “Just kidding. Wait in front of my house at 10. My mother should be asleep by then,” you instructed him before you jumped to your feet and ran away.

“I can’t wait!” Joshua hollered, already counting time until your next meeting.

“Me, too!” You yelled as you put your hands in the air, waving at him in excitement. “Don’t be late!”

[postersofleon]

The Undesirable Feeling Of Love

During missions with Leon, every time Ada Wong must always appear, and at first they didn't really mind her. Funny enough, even found her interesting enough to keep her around. But as time passed, they were getting tired of Leon's attitude towards Ada. Always forgetting you and forgiving her sins. After another brutal mission, they finally have the guts to complain about his conduct.

content: angst

warnings and mentions: no assigned gender or race; they/them pronouns used; resident evil 6 kinda mentioned but not really; ada wong isn't the bad guy in this story but she is technically a bad guy; reader and leon fight with words; sexual talk but nothing sexual; the question of what is right or wrong; bad coping mechanism as in sexual; alcohol; jealously from leon's part; bad friend leon; mention of chris redfield; no happy ending

This mission was fucking awful. Fucking awful. Leon wasn't usually an idiot like this, he wasn't usually an idiot, but this time they couldn't deal with it. Oh, this time was full of anger and frustration. They stopped Leon in front of the agency, they were tapping their foot on the ground as they saw Leon approach. Leon immediately groaned, there wasn't peace between these friends since 2005 thanks to Leon's decisions. "What do you want?" He walked back them. He didn't stop to look at his friend in the eye, they followed Leon quickly; their heel turned around and walked with Leon.

"What the hell was this mission, Kennedy?" They glared at Leon, "No offense but not even our last mission with her around got this bad."

Leon rolled his eyes, "Ada died and this is your first complain." The two friends walked down the streets, people ignored them as they began their conversation. "Leon, the problem is you." They stopped Leon with a simple gesture but it didn't last. Leon kept walking.

They groaned, "I know you like her but for fuck's sake," The sun was making this conversation feel even worst, the sun burned on their backs and began to make them sweat. "You fought with Chris to prove a point. You got lucky your point was valid." Leon stopped and looked at his friend, "Are you going to just bitch and moan for what I did? I managed to prove that Ada was innocent all you're doing is complain."

They felt their anger start forming in their cheeks, "That's not my point, Kennedy!"

"What is it then?" Leon clenched his jaw with a grin in his lips, he got close to their face, "Exactly, you got nothing."

They held Leon's forearm, "I got a lot of shit to say, Kennedy." They pulled Leon back, the people still ignored them as the conversation began to get the unnecessary heat. Maybe they should've waited and calm down their anger, but ooh- they absolutely hated how Leon had semi called them a bitch and his stupid grin he wanted to get. "A whole lot of shit to say." Leon glared back at his friend. "What is it, huh?"

They couldn't believe that this situation was forming and it was getting worst. "Fuck, have you been drinking?" They tried to speak calmly.

"No, no, don't try to get rid of this conversation- what did I do to you that was so horrible?" Leon swallowed as his arms crossed against his chest.

"Fall in love with Ada." They replied so simply that it made them feel guilty. Sure, Ada had her horrible flaws but she didn't deserve to get dragged in this conversations. "I don't know how you managed it. But a stupid simple kiss and six years later kept your cock hard for years." Oh, no. They are losing control. They closed their eyes to try to relax, and while they managed to calm down Leon was getting even more pissy.

"My cock hard, huh?" Leon pushed himself back. It was obvious that this fight was getting worst and for some reason no one still didn't see or try to listen to their conversation.

"Yeah, your stupid cock. You are always forgiving Ada's contributions from making the virus worst," They clenched their jaw, "And when you finally actually got the chance to fuck her, you got fucking worst." Their voice didn't shake. They never wanted to be a negative Nancy when speaking about the relationship Leon had with Ada. "I know Ada isn't technically a bad person but she is working against us."

Leon got their face, "Yeah, like all those times she saved us, huh? Did you forget when we were Spain? Do you remember Raccoon City! Even this stupid mission!" His blue eyes looked cruel against their eyes, but that didn't stop them from snapping back. "Forgiving her despite making the virus worst, huh? Right now, I don't give a shit how many times she saved us because all I see you being a moron."

Leon began to walk away, they quickly followed him, "Then, you bitch and moan crying because you hate fighting against the bioweapons your girlfriend caused." They shrugged, "But that's love right?"

He threw them a dirty stare, "You don't know anything about Ada."

"You don't even know her real name!" They exclaimed annoyed.

Leon's face was twitching with anger, his jaw clenched; He stopped rubbed his face.

"When we first met, I actually thought you were an honest man, you graduated the top of your police academy, but seeing a hot woman makes you an idiot." They started to feel more calm. Did they have all this anger inside them without knowing? It didn't matter. They felt tired.

"At least she didn't leave me like you did," Leon said looking back at them, "She actually tried to know the man I was." Their anger was fluttering inside but Leon continued to speak. "What did you do?-"

"Are you a fucking idiot or does the idiot way of thinking appeared since you got pussy?" They snapped back angrily. They glared at Leon, they pursed their lips together, "You were the moron who decide to get missions and vacations without me since Spain. I actually thought we were getting better in 2007, but I was wrong- so painfully wrong." They actually thought they were getting close to Leon, the have been friends since 1998 and apparently they didn't try hard enough for him. Their emotions were getting worst, but in a different way.

"And that's why you went crawling to Chris?" Leon gritted his teeth, "Because I had a life without you?"

They began to let tears go, "Because you were my friend." They whispered. They didn't care if Leon was with Ada, but the way Leon just decided to act that their friendship meant nothing. They cleaned their tears away from their face, but something appeared in their mind... They looked at Leon and shook their head, "I don't love you anymore." It came from their soul. It was the most fragile thing that wasn't suppose to come out, but now Leon heard it. Leon's face soften, "What?"

They didn't know either, was it the romantic way or the platonic way? They shook their head as they repeated it again, "I-I don't love you anymore." Their voice stuttered. Leon wasn't the same Leon they grew to love, he was different and mean- they slowly began walking back to the agency. Leon didn't try to follow them because he was stuck with those words. They once loved Leon.

Leon tried to look at them but they were gone; All Leon had were the people walking around him. They were on their phones or talking with each other. Leon stood alone in a crowd.

[hackersluvs]

What are we? -VH

Vinnie Hacker x fmreader / slight Regie Macalino x fmreader Summary- You and Vinnie had been having a situationship for a couple months now. Acting more like a couple, going on dates, holding hands, ect. But when he starts flirting with a girl at a party, you both get into a argument. That leaves you wondering what are you guys. content warning- cuss words (all I can really think of)

Angst pt 1 ⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⋆.ೃ࿔*:･ I was setting up mine and vinnie's regular movie nights. Popcorn, pizza "pineapple pizza" to be specific, red wine, and gummy worms. These nights are so special to me, and it gives me hope that one of these days we can actually be an official couple. While I was setting up the final touches, I hear a knock on my door and quickly went to open the door. "Vin" I say in excitement and pull him into hug. "Hey beautiful" he says while giving me a small peck making me blushing. I closed the door and pull them to the couch. "I hope you are ready to watch zootopia" I giggle. He rolls his eyes, "You only want to watch it cause that stupid fox is in it." "Hey he's not stupid, he's a fine fox." I tell him. And he just gives me a weird look and says "I can't believe I like a girl who has a crush on a literal fox" I grab a pillow and hit him with it, "Hey don't judge me, and watch the movie." Rolling my eyes and then laying my head on his chest.

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･3 days later ⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

I was sitting on my desk editing a new youtube video when I get a face time call from vinnie. "Hey Vin, what up."

He gives me one of his most famous smiles that will always make me weak. "Hey beautiful, my friend invited me to this party later tonight and wanted to know if you would like to come with me?"

"I would love to" I tell him. "Perfect, I will pick you up. See you later beautiful" He kisses his phone before hanging up.

I look at the time and see I still have lots of time to finish editing the video before I start getting ready. After a editing, door dashing a quick lunch I began to get ready. I look a quick shower, started to straighten my hair, and did my everyday make up. After doing everything I was supposed to I got a texted from vinnie saying he was here. I quickly went down and entered his car and gave him a quick kiss. Once we arrived at the party hand in hand. I let go of his hand, "I will go find the bathroom and come and find you." "See you later beautiful" he said kissing my cheek.

Once I was done with the bathroom and grabbing a quick drink I went to go look for vinnie. I was pushing threw the people and still couldn't find him... Until I saw in on the couch all up with this girl I've never seen or met. I hear a voice behind me "Trouble in paradise" I hear a voice behind me, it was Regie Macalino, He's part of a music band call North Star Boys. We met a while back we have a mutual friend and she took me to one of his concerts she got invited to.

I smiled "Ha ha ha very funny Regie" We began to talk that it made me forget all about vinnie. We were laughing and having a good time, until I heard vinnie. "Y/N what the hell."

"What do you want Vincent I said angrily. "You said you were going to the bathroom and now I find you all up on this guy when you came to this party with me." he yelled I was about to speak up when Regie spoke "Yo man what the fuck, don't speak to her like that. "Don't call me man and I was talking with her." he said pushing Vinnie "Woah, Vinnie don't even start." I turned to Regie "Reg I'm okay I got this from here okay, I will talk to you later.

"If you need anything you can just call me" he says while kissing my cheek. After he walked away I turned to Vinnie. "What is your problem?" "What is my problem? What is your problem? You said you were going to the bathroom and never came back and I find you flirting with that Regie guy." he fights back I rolled my eyes "Oh please, you are such a hypocrite. I did come back and I found you all up that one girl." I should've bit my tongue while I was still able to "I don't even see the point of why it matters you are not my boyfriend." He rolls his eyes and says "Ya you are right we are not dating whatever we had is just a fling or whatever." "Fuck you Vinnie." I said walking away.

[hoedamn-eron]

he found the box of condoms - part 3 (finale)

You and Leto have to deal with the aftermath of your relationship.

Warnings: Age gap, but it is appropriate/legal. Mentions of drinking but it's isn't specified to be alcohol (but it's implied). An awful lot of dialogue. Some swearing. Angsty but happy ending. I have never seen nor read Dune (yet), so there may be some inaccuracies (Duke and Paul being OOC, stuff like that), but it's Modern!AU anyway. Slightly proof-read, as per usual. Word count: 3,025 GN!Reader, no use of Y/N.

FINALLY, I have this posted! Not some of my best work, but I was so aware that I hadn't updated this for 4 months!

Part 2

You wished you had declined your parent’s invitation to their barbeque.

It had been a terrible week. You had started your new job, but the person you were taking over from must have left the company with spite since they left everything in such a mess, that you technically couldn’t ‘start’ your job until everything was put right again. And there was a snooty woman (Harriet, in sales) on your office floor who had already decided you weren’t worth her time, and she seemed to have her fingers stuck in a lot of pies.

You’re dating life was a joke too. You’d been on a few dates here and there, from your adventures in the worlds of Tinder, and Bumble, but nothing went past the first date. They were all either looking for different things or just general walking red flags. The only ‘successful’ dates you had had were with your neighbour, Tom, who was a really nice guy, who treated you really well, and put an effort into your dates, but you had let him down massively by being too hooked on Leto Atreides. Now you can barely look at him when you happen to pass each other in the hallway of your building.

Speaking of your living arrangements, your apartment wasn’t working out like you thought it would. When you moved in five months ago, you weren’t prepared (or warned about) the excessively noisy neighbours, and the terrible water pressure, and the fact that your apartment was just freezing constantly. You’d already been on your landlord’s case, but he didn’t seem to care in the slightest, not now he’d had your security deposit and months’ worth of rent. You were on the verge of asking your parents if you could move back in until you could afford and better place.

And to top off your already terrible week, Leto was here.

You hadn’t seen him since he broke up with you six months ago, after you told your parents and Paul (who hadn’t talked to you since) of your relationship. It had been a hard time for you, obviously, practically seeing him every day since he lived next door to your parents. Of course, you didn’t expect your parents to stop talking to him, he was their friend before he was your partner (even though your dad had given him the cold shoulder for a while); but they could have given you some warning that he was going to be here.

“I’m sorry,” your mother said after pulling you aside to ‘help with the salad’, away from earshot of the other guests.

You were already shaking your head at her, giving her a tight smile. “It’s fine.”

It wasn’t, but you weren’t going to tell your mother who she can and can’t have in her own house.

“Your father must’ve invited him – “

“Really, it’s fine,” you say, placing your hand on her shoulder. “I’m gonna grab a drink.”

You really needed one.

Your mother soon went back to mingling and you hung around by the kitchen door, regretting your decision to come to the barbeque more and more. Everyone just seemed so chatty and happy, and like they currently had no problems happening in their lives. These people weren’t struggling to get hot water or being shunned in work by their new co-workers.

They most certainly weren’t in the same space as their ex-partners, still hopelessly in love with them. You did feel slightly pathetic, still pining over Leto the way you were, especially when he’d made it perfectly clear that it would be in everyone’s best interests that you separated.

“We shouldn’t see each other anymore.”

You had the feeling that was what was coming when he had said ‘We need to talk’. Nothing good every came from ‘we need to talk.’ But it didn’t stop you physically feeling your heart break in two, your body suddenly feeling like it would collapse.

Leto’s shoulders slumped as he looked at you with, annoyingly, sympathy. “That came out – “

“No, it’s fine,” you breathed, lightly shaking your head. “I get it.”

But it wasn’t fine, and you didn’t get it. You didn’t understand why you two would need to end what you had, just because Paul had thrown a hissy fit. But at the end of the day, you knew – deep down - Leto would choose Paul over you any day; he was his son, his flesh and blood. They’d both been through a lot since Jessica died. Leto would want the easiest life for Paul, and this wasn’t a part of it.

“I’m sorry,” Leto whispered, looking at you with those deep brown eyes, that you always thought held the stars. “I’m so sorry. It’s just you’re young, you don’t want to be with someone like me, an old man. And Paul is…I’m sorry.”

You shook your head at him again, disagreeing with everything he was saying. You both go silent before a wobbly smile makes its way on to your face. “We can always stay friends.”

Leto stared at you for a moment before giving a single nod. “We can.”

You almost roll your eyes at the memory, trying hard to ignore the pang in your chest. You hadn’t even remotely stayed friends. You wanted far away from him as humanly possible after that night. You were pissed off for a while, blaming Paul and wanting to wring his neck, but eventually you accepted that was just how life was going to go. Sometimes things work out how you want, and sometimes they don’t.

No matter how much you had wanted it.

You take a large sip of your drink, almost coughing at the burn down your throat. You truly didn’t want to be here. Maybe you could give your parents a discreet goodbye a quietly sneak out. Surely no-one would notice, only your parents had greeted you. Leto hadn’t even noticed you were here. You take a quick glance around your parents sunroom, your eyes landing on the God of a man himself.

He always looked so effortlessly good looking. He’d grown his beard out a little and God dammit, if salt and pepper wasn’t his colour. His white polo really brought out his golden tan, evident he’d been working in his garden with the nice weather you’d had the last few weeks. He didn’t look like his life was falling apart; obviously, Leto was a perfect human being. Nothing ever went wrong with Leto Atreides.

You sigh as you finish your drink, throwing your head back and looking back at Leto, before jumping out of your skin.

He was looking right at you, an unreadable look on his face.

You avert your gaze quickly, going to take another drink before realising it was already gone. Good, an excuse to disappear and avoid Leto’s coffee brown gaze. You make your way into the kitchen, intending to raid your parents appropriately named ‘drinks fridge’ for a good five or ten minutes. You weren’t ready to face him, even 6 months of being apart. It still hurt.

Once you had refilled your drink, you turn only to nearly drop your drink in shock. Leto had followed you into the kitchen.

Oh God, you’re cornered, there was no escaping him now.

“Hey.”

Why, why, did he have to have a voice that melted you from the inside out? It wasn’t fair. And you hadn’t heard him since you moved out, it shouldn’t make you feel like this.

“Hi,” you greet back. You curse yourself as the slight wobble in your voice, but you hope he didn’t notice.

He probably did, but he won’t say anything, because he’s just that nice of a person. He’s even looking at you like he’s causing you such an inconvenience talking to you.

“How are you?”

How were you going to answer that? Would you be honest and tell him that you were the unhappiest you’d been in a while, or would you lie? You could tell him that you were living your best life, that everything was absolutely fine with you, that you hadn’t had a few unsuccessful pity dates with your neighbour across the hall, because all you could think about was the Adonis of a man stood in front of you.

You’re taking too long to answer. The call of your name causes you to blink at him with a quick, “I’m fine.”

Leto nodded, an awkward silence filling the air. You look down at the drink in your hand, swirling it around the glass, biting your lip. You wanted to leave. What were you supposed to talk about? How miserable your life was? How he’s probably living his best single life with all the people falling at his feet?

“Your mom mentioned you’d…that you’d met someone.”

You couldn’t help the snort of a laugh that came out of you. Straight to the point. You shook your head as you look back up at Leto, a confused look on his face. “I wouldn’t say mine and my neighbour’s dates were something to write home about, pretty sure we’re not going to go out again.”

“So you’re not seeing anyone?”

“No.”

“So I can take you out then?”

You freeze, looking at him with wide eyes. What did he just say? “Pardon me?”

“I’ve been…completely miserable,” he said, huffing a laugh as he shook his head. “The past six months have been rough.”

The nerve! He broke up with you. He decided to end your relationship for Paul’s feelings, which you understood, really you did, but that didn’t mean you were going to just drop everything and crawl back into his arms. He’d ignored you for six months until today. As much as you were pining for Leto when you first spotted him, you couldn’t help but feel put out and pissed off.

Unnerved by your silence, Leto cleared his throat. “I spoke to Paul – “

“That makes one of us,” you mutter.

“He’s mentioned that he misses you and wants to make things right between us all.”

“He could have reached out himself instead of making you come and speak to me,” you mutter. “It’s awkward enough as it is.”

“He didn’t make me – “ Leto huffed, his shoulders slumping. “I’m trying here.”

“I just thought that my feelings meant just as much as Paul’s do.”

Leto sighed your name, closing his eyes in frustration.

“No, I get it,” you say, nodding at him. “As long as Paul’s feelings aren’t hurt.”

Leto looked back at you. “He’s my son – “

“And as I said, I get that, but he was also my friend. And he was a prick.”

“I know, I’m sorry, but you have to understand – “

“I do.”

You both stare at each other.

After a few moments, Leto shook his head at you. “I don’t know what to say.”

“You don’t have to say anything,” you counter. “We broke up. That was it. The relationship was evidently too much, so we decided to end it. And now you’re coming up to me, assuming you can take me out, like nothing happened?”

You knew you were being unfair. You had agreed to break it off too, but you had been having a bad week and you weren’t prepared for him to be at your parent’s house after feeling sorry for yourself. And for him to just approach you the way he did and throw his feelings back at you?

You wanted the floor to open you up and swallow you whole.

You found yourself suddenly laughing in disbelief, averting your gaze to look around the kitchen, mainly so you didn’t have to look at his heart-breaking expression, and so he didn’t see the overwhelmed tears in your eyes. “I really didn’t need this today.”

Leto didn’t say anything as you ranted to him, your stress and anger from the past few weeks coming out of you.

“Ever since we broke up, I feel like my life just fell apart. I lost Paul, and you, and my apartment that looked great on paper absolutely sucks and my landlord knows it but doesn’t bother to fix anything. My new job isn’t what I thought it would be and I have already rubbed somebody the wrong way, and I can’t seem to hold down a date with a decent guy, because all I can think about is you!”

You hadn’t realised Leto had made his way to you until he pulled you into his arms. You hadn’t realised you were crying until he was shushing you and whispering apologies in your ear, keeping you to his chest and he lightly swayed you. He was always so warm and welcoming, and always left you wanting to stay in his arms eternally.

You find yourself trapped in a wave of conflicting emotions. As the memories of the time you had spent with Leto flood back, you feel a mix of joy, pain, and longing at being held by him again, even if it was in the middle of a breakdown. Your heart feels heavy with the weight of regret, as you reminiscence on the times you had together and the things left unsaid when you broke up, how it was so sudden when you felt like your relationship had just started.

You don’t know how long you both stood embracing in the kitchen for, but you were vaguely aware of Leto waving your mother away, probably checking to see where you’d both gotten to. You heard your father call to the guests that he was going to start grilling, so you took that as your queue to get out of the kitchen. You pulled away from Leto, wiping at your eyes and avoiding looking at him.

You’d embarrassed yourself enough.

He watched you silently pull yourself back together before you finally look up at him, giving him a shaky smile. “Sorry about that.”

Leto was already shaking his head. “You don’t need to apologise. Ever.”

You take a few more deep breaths, finally calming down. “Did you mean what you said?”

Leto looked at you with a raised brow, before countering back. “Did you?”

Well, yes you did. You know you constantly think about Leto. He’s never far from your mind, you’re always wondering how he was doing since you moved out of your parent’s place, wondering if he ever got back into the dating pool, or if Paul had forgiven him (evidently, he did). Leto was the love of your life, even if you both chose to separate. And despite this, he was giving you the choice to get back together.

You eventually nod at him. “I did. I think about you all the time.”

Leto gave a small laugh of disbelief. “Then what are we both doing?”

You shook your head at him. “I don’t know. Everything was happening so fast, I didn’t…”

Leto gives you a small smile. “I understand.”

“I didn’t want us to break up. I didn’t want to be alone, without you, but you looked like you were doing so well without me and I was practically a pathetic, blubbering mess.”

“I’m sorry I made you feel that way.”

“I’m glad you were as miserable as I am,” you say jokingly, giving a small laugh.

The change in Leto is instant. His shoulders relax, and he starts giving you that small smile that he used to give you when you were having your long talks on dates. It was the smile that warmed your insides and made you feel gooey, like a teenager going to prom with the most popular person in school.

He stuck his hand out to you. “Shall we start again? I’m Leto, it’s nice to meet you.”

You snort but humour him, grasping at his hand as you introduce yourself.

“I just noticed you across the room and I have to say, you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen.”

“You’re so cheesy.”

“I remember you used to like me being cheesy.”

You feel your cheeks warm as you gave him a light shove. “We just met, Leto, I don’t know what you mean.”

Leto smiled at you. “Want me to ask you out again?”

You couldn’t help but sigh dreamily at him. Your heart beats hard against your chest as you nodded at him.

“Can I take you out sometime?”

Your breathing quickens, and you still felt like you were melting against that smile of his. This was it. This was your opportunity to be with Leto again, to be happy again. You wouldn’t need to sneak around and you could be a real life couple.

But you didn’t want to risk being hurt again. What if the same problems arose, that Paul wasn’t okay with it after a while, or your parents? Would Leto break it off again? Would he think it was too much again and end things? You were still an adult and could make decisions for yourself; something that others seemed to forget last time.

But you could handle it. You loved him, and you were sure he loved you. And you could be together again.

You nod at Leto. “Yes. I would love to go out with you.”

Leto grinned. “Are you free on Saturday?”

“I am.”

“I’ll pick you up at seven on Saturday then.”

Before you could reply, Leto leans forward, his lips meeting yours. You melt against him, your eyes closing as you revel in the familiarity of their kiss. The way his lips fit perfectly against yours after so long, like coming home after a long journey. You wrap your arms around each other tightly, deepening the kiss, savouring every moment as if you’d never been apart.

As the kiss comes to an end, you both pull away, gazing into each other's eyes, feeling the love and longing that has been building inside you for so long.

“I’ll hide the condoms better next time.”

You let out a laugh before slipping your hand into his, leading him back out to the party. You choose to ignore the smirk your parents were giving each other as you join them.

Tagged - @m0nster-fvcker, @justanotherkpopstanlol, @eonnyx, @secre-flower, @shaggzthatsnottheworm

[magicfootballstuff]

Strictly Unprofessional - part 3 (alexia putellas x reader)

Summary: You’ve just landed your dream job as a photographer at FC Barcelona Femení. The only problem? You hooked up with the captain five years ago and haven’t seen her since.

Part 3/9

Read other parts here.

———

five years ago

Ibiza is amazing. 

You’re here for a week with two of your best friends, Camila and Sofía, all three of you celebrating your recent graduation from university. A week of sunshine and partying before you have to return to the real world to try to make it as a photographer.

Today you’re at a beach party. There are bodies as far as the eye can see, all wearing bikinis or swim shorts, and more people splashing about in the sea beyond the sand. A huge covered stage with a DJ deck, scantily clad dancers and massive speakers pumping out dance music is the centrepiece of the beach and there are bars set up all around for the partygoers to buy drinks.

“Tell us if anybody catches your eye,” Camila says, looking around at the crowd of people that surrounds you.

“I told you, I’m not looking for anyone.”

You’re newly single, a few weeks out of a messy three year relationship and your friends have decided that the timing is perfect for you to find a rebound hookup while you’re in Ibiza. Casual isn’t really your style and you’ve tried to protest, but your friends are being pretty insistent that the best way to welcome you back to the single life is with a literal bang.

As your friends debate what type of girl they’re looking to set you up with, you tune out their conversation and let yourself get distracted by two girls who stand nearby reapplying sun lotion. They share enough similarities that they must be sisters, though it’s the taller one who catches your eye. She’s well-built with broad shoulders and defined muscles, a natural tan that tells you she’s either always on vacation or spends a lot of time outdoors, and when she turns so that the other girl she’s with can lotion up her back, you see a few small tattoos decorating her skin.

She’s the hottest girl you’ve seen all week, the only one who’s made you reconsider if the plan to get you laid while you’re out here might be worth a shot, and now that you’ve seen her, it’s going to be very hard to settle for anybody else.

“Hey,” says Camila, nudging you to get your attention. “What’s distracted you?”

“Or who?” Sofía interjects.

“Nobody,” you answer, a little too quickly. 

Of course you friends pick up on it immediately.

“Who is she?” they ask, scanning the crowded beach for any sign of who might have caught your eye.

“Nobody,” you insist. 

You glance back over at the two girls, barely able to stop yourself from drooling as the sun shines off the freshly lotioned back of the taller girl, her muscles rippling beneath the skin as she moves. 

And suddenly she’s turning, nudged by her sister who has noticed you looking at them and nods in your direction.

“Oh shit,” you say, bringing your sunglasses down to cover your eyes and turning away in the hope that it looks less like you were staring.

It’s too late because your friends seem to have worked out exactly who caught your eye.

“Oh, she’s hot!” Camila says. “And just your type.”

“She’s with someone though,” points out Sofía. “What if they’re together?”

“They look more like sisters to me,” Camila replies.

“Ah, the eternal lesbian question - sisters or girlfriends?”

“Will you two shut up and stop staring?” you interject. “I told you, I’m not interested in a summer fling.” You pause, then say, “And if I was, you’re not helping me by acting like this.”

———

You focus on enjoying the beach party and try to forget about the hot girl but that proves to be difficult, because when you’re waiting at one of the bars an hour later, a tall figure walks up beside you and you realise it’s her.

You think it might be coincidental, until she smiles and says, “Hi.”

You smile back, not entirely sure if she’s actually starting a conversation or just being polite until she speaks again.

“I’m Alexia, by the way.”

A little taken aback, and wondering if she saw you staring earlier and remembers you, you introduce yourself.

“Who are you here with?” Alexia asks.

“Two of my friends. You?”

“My little sister,” Alexia tells you, answering the ‘sister or girlfriend’ dilemma from your earlier conversation with Camila and Sofía. “She’s the one who said I should talk to you. Said that if I didn’t, then she would.”

Your cheeks start to heat up, Alexia’s words pretty much confirming that she and her sister noticed you staring, though you’re also glad it doesn’t seem to be unwelcome.

“Wow, I’m flattered,” you tell Alexia, and in an attempt to flirt back, you add, “but you’re definitely more my type.”

Alexia’s lips curl upwards in a slow smile.

“That’s good to know.” She leans ever so slightly against your side, her arm brushing against yours as she gestures to the bar and asks, “So can I buy you a drink?”

You can barely believe she’s talking to you, let alone offering to buy you a drink, but you’d be stupid to say no.

“Sure.”

Alexia catches the bartender’s attention and orders two of something that sounds exotic, before she turns back to you as the drinks are being prepared.

“So what do you do when you’re not partying in Ibiza?” she asks, leaning sideways on the bar with one elbow so that she can look at you.

“I’m a photographer. Or at least, I’m trying to be one. I just graduated from university. When I get back from Ibiza I need to start finding a job.”

“What do you take pictures of?”

“Everything,” you answer with a shrug, never wishing more than now that you had a clearer idea about where your career is going so that you could have something interesting to talk about to maybe impress Alexia. “I can’t really afford to be picky while I’m still building a portfolio, but I love photographing events. There’s just something so special about blending into the background with your camera and capturing people just living their lives. It’s much more authentic than doing portraits or photoshoots.”

Alexia lifts her sunglasses and perches them on top of her head, revealing hazel eyes that sparkle with warmth as she smiles at you and says, “That’s a really nice sentiment.”

“What do you do?” you ask.

“Oh, I play football.”

You have a million questions, intrigued and surprised by her answer, but the nonchalant shrug she gives makes it seem like she doesn’t want to talk about it much. Instead, you try to imagine her playing football, utilising her strength and obvious athleticism, and your eyes subconsciously start to wander over her bikini-clad body again.

“That explains a lot,” you murmur, as the bartender sets two drinks down in front of you, served in hollowed out pineapples and garnished with small fruit and a bright pink straw.

Alexia must know where your mind has wandered to because she smirks, but leans closer and still asks, “What do you mean by that?”

Her proximity is dizzying, but you’re getting all the right signals to have the confidence to tease her right back.

“Stick around for another drink and maybe I’ll tell you.”

Alexia taps her pineapple against yours and lifts the straw to her lips as she grins and says, “Deal.”

———

present day

“Ibiza, right? When was it? Four - five years ago?”

“2018,” you answer. “I thought you’d forgotten.”

“You look different. Your hair is longer. And you’re wearing clothes.”

Your computer almost slides off your lap, saved only by the back of the seat in front of you, and you shut it quickly to save it from getting damaged. Something tells you that you’re going to need your full attention on this conversation anyway, especially if Alexia is going to drop comments like that.

“Shit, that came out wrong,” Alexia apologises, realising that her words have startled you. “I didn’t mean … you were wearing a bikini when we first met, that’s all.”

You smile at Alexia and say, “Nice save.”

“Why didn’t you say anything?” Alexia asks.

“Because I could tell you didn’t recognise me and I didn’t want to make things weird,” you answer with a shrug.

“That makes sense,” Alexia acknowledges. “You must think I’m such an asshole.”

You shake your head and smile in reassurance.

“No, I understand.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t recognise you sooner,” Alexia apologises. “Well, I did recognise you but when I was trying to figure out where I knew you from it didn’t cross my mind that we might have slept together.”

“It’s fine,” you say. You glance around the bus, slightly worried about having this conversation in a public place, but the celebratory songs coming from the girls at the back of the bus are doing a pretty good job of masking your conversation. “Look, I don’t do that kind of thing often…”

“And you think I do?” Alexia asks, raising her eyebrows at you.

“Well I don’t know, do I? We barely know each other. There’s no judgement from me if you do. But whether there’s been a hundred other girls or none at all… what I mean is that it would have been arrogant if I got mad because you didn’t remember something that happened five years ago. I get it. It was one night of fun when we were on vacation. We’re both adults, it doesn’t need to be a big deal.”

“It was fun,” Alexia murmurs, shooting you an amused smile. When you don’t respond, she straightens her face and says, “Sorry. Adults. Got it. But you don’t need to worry. We’re not the first people at this football club to have history, nor will we be the last.”

Though you’ve only been at Barcelona for a month and try to keep your head out of the private lives of the people you work with, especially the players, the dressing room gossip does occasionally filter into the staff offices too. You’re not sure of exact details, nor will you probably ever know everything, but you know there are players on the team who are currently dating or have dated each other in the past. It’s to be expected really - lots of attractive women, many of them gay, playing an emotionally charged sport every day. But while it’s normal for the players to have relationships with each other, you don’t know if there are any rules forbidding staff from getting involved with players, nor do you want to find out if there are any consequences, even if it happened years ago.

“Do any of the other girls know about us?” you ask.

“I only realised myself last night,” Alexia answer. “But no, and I won’t tell them. The past is the past.”

“Thanks.”

“It’s good to see you again though,” Alexia says, her hand finding your thigh and squeezing, before she withdraws it. 

“Yeah, you too.”

[b1ackgh0st]

Writing as many HCs for Trolls characters as humanly possible!

Starting off strong with the Snack Pack + Poppy & Branch!

♡Poppy♡

She was a later bloomer. Most (pop) trolls have a little bit of tit, but she was flat as Branch's voice at the beginning of the first movie.

Had a toxic best friend at one point. Nobody liked Poppy when she was young, but as soon as she became an adult, she was mote liked than anyone else.

Prefers black coffee over any other kind

Her favorite flavour is strawberry!

Even though she likes almost any flavour, any candy she has that's lemon or watermelon she gives to Branch because he is very addicted.

Speaking of which, she can't stomach spicy food at all and tends to projectile vomit.

Gets sick pretty easily, but won't admit it.

No one knows how she does it, but she can appear almost instantly. Whether it's in Branch's room at midnight or behind anyone in a crowded area, it's alarming.

Not physically violent.

However...

Poppy is deranged AF!

She will verbally and mentally threaten people... and lord it's probably scary.

Too much of a morning person

By that, I mean she wakes up at around 3 am everyday after falling asleep at around 7 pm and starts her daily routine.

Refuses to wear make-up

Has never had acne or anything similar

Most Pop Trolls, Poppy included, have extream hair growth. She has to shave her legs daily.

Has literally no skincare routine

Unfortunately, she has to make her own shampoo because anything she can find in shops doesn't work and just causes dead ends and very greasy hair.

Very fidgety ADHD-er

□Branch□

Branch has the most excessive skincare routine ever

Wears A LOT of makeup to hide scars and stuff

Breaks out really easily

Autistic! Not Yay!

Or maybe it is Yay

Anyways, he had problems with bright lights, loud sounds, being close to other people, some kinds fo texture, and some scents

Has around seventy homemade candles around the bunker, all scented slightly different.

Most of them smell like citrus

Sucks at making coffee at home, therefore his coffee orders are pretty specific.

Despite going back onto society, he's still a feral troll.

Which means that, while pop trolls are omnivores who need lots of plants and sweets in their diet, Branch's diet is almost exclusively meat, sweets, and breads.

Has bitten Poppy before. (It was an accident, I promise. No trolls were harmed.)

While he may not overreact on safty stuff or the Bergens anymore, he' started overreacting to everything else.

Oh, Guy tripped and scraped his knee? GET HIM TO THE DOCTOR HE'S DYING!

Mr. Dinkles is lost again? HE COULD BE ANYWHERE WE'LL NEVER MIND HIM!

Yeah.

Insomniac, unfortunately.

Biggie!!

Eats bugs. (Small stuff like ants)

Also kind of deranged.

Or he had some undiagnosed mental stuff

Prefers tea

Also has ADHD

I ddont really have much since he's pretty perfect when it comes to the movies and his character-

SMIDGE

Oldest in the gang, actually

She's thirty-eight, and witness Poppy hatching UP CLOSE

Poppy kind of sees her as a mother figure, mostly because Poppy never had a mother.

Smidge tried to have a kid once (yes, it was Milton's.), but it was a miscarriage

Her short stature and abnormal strength is actually a very rare genetic phenomenon

She used to have a really smooth, "feminine" voice,but after years of working out and screaming at the top of her lungs, her voice is scratchy now

Wants to do speech therapy to try and get her old voice back, but... well, Pop Village doesn't have stuff like that.

Has low self-esteem

Has been married to Milton for about a year (By the end of TBT)

Only drinks energy drinks, always Cherry flavour. (Or something similar)

Just a little crazy, but aren't we all?

The reason she's so close to Poppy is because right before the tunnel thing to get away from the Bergens, she worked with Peppy.

Won't continue with that.

Enjoys playfully bullying Suki because she's the only one who doesn't take it seriously.

Guy Diamond ◇

Oh man

Did NOT get enough attention as a kid

His parents were either too busy, and were both taken while running through the tunnels

Sky Toronto (From TBGO and Trollstopia) is his uncle, but neither of them know that

The only clothes he'd ever wear would be a scarf and leg warmers, maybe gloves.

Either he just dislikes it or he's genuinely afraid of it, he won't drink alcohol.

Secretly likes to eat things that aren't really edible

Also, scroll past this if you wanna because imma explain how it's not awkward that the glitter trolls are almost all naked.

So, since Glitter trolls are a subspecies, one which probably derived from a tribe long ago, their anatomy is a little different

They have protective slits that hide their genitals until needed

Essentially, the glitter trolls that have dicks.. their disks are hidden kn that slit, and will start to come out when said glitter troll is aroused.

For the one that don't, the slit will just start to open on it's own

Having a cock or not doesn't decide the gender of a Pop Troll, BTW!!

Cooper & Darnell

Darnell yassified him.

He ended up with silver tattoos on one arm, multiple silver bracelets, necklaces, and earrings, and silver dread cuffs

C & D spend a lot of time together

C had a hard time deciding, but ultimately chose to stay woth the Funk Tribe and his family rather than with the Pop Trolls

He stolll visits them <3

I'll make more later, dw.

[peachfruitcake]

did you hear about what Martin said about Susan and Linda on the Twitter space he hosted on the 27th? i thought of you instantly when he started talking about them and have been waiting for you to post your thoughts! :-)

HEHE YES IM THE ONE WHO’S QUESTION LED TO THAT!!!!!

Now for those who didn’t listen to that space, Martin said that Linda called her to say goodbye but never specified how it went of course. Besides “hey Susan I’m leaving sorry this is really impacting my mental health” “gaaaaaaaaaaey”/j

This is all a personal headcanon but I like to think that their friendship grew incredibly distant ever since Linda married Felix, Susan probably stopped talking to her altogether for a while and it would leave Linda very confused and upset. They might’ve started talking to eachother again a little bit as the series of events began to approach but only very brief small talk, maybe Linda complaining a little and giving Susan a few life updates and them both talking about stuff they’ve been noticing with others lately (especially Felix’s drinking), but nothing deeper than that.

I see Susan being extremely emotionally closed off to most people except maybe a select few that she knows very closely, so if you were to ask her what’s going on in her life she’d give you a very vaguely watered down version and not what’s actually going on or how she’s really managing herself emotionally.

So basically she used to be more open with Linda, but during that period she sort of just started treating her like a stranger.

So when Linda called her first to tell her that she’s finally leaving, Susan acted how she usually would, keeping it calm, understanding and respectful and wishing her luck, but she won’t really show any more than that. Or that she cried later and felt pretty bad that they couldn’t be so close anymore and that she’ll probably never be able to make up for herself acting so distant for the past many years again.

Of course this all comes from how I view Susan as a character myself though and also the fact that I refuse to pass up the idea that she has feelings for Linda. I like to think that she introduced her to Felix cuz Linda was getting more desperate to find a relationship and Susan was getting weird thoughts so in a panic she shoved her off to him so she could avoid the urges. They’ve been boiling within her since highschool and she always was able to push them aside or excuse them as “she’s just my very close friend I don’t have many close friends so she feels extra special” and as the years went by they began distracting her a lot from her work and were growing stronger and more unavoidable aaand they were really beginning to affect how she’d interact with Linda and you see Susan hates feeling like another has any control over her and Linda just wouldn’t shut up about hooooow badly she wants a relationship and hoooow many dates keep failing and Susan was at the point to where she was starting to get the kind of dreams that make you stare up at the ceiling in horror when you open your eyes in the morning so one day when she overheard Felix speaking about being single and wanting to start looking around, she decided to introduce her to him. Susan allegedly never finds a problem she can’t fix in some way so that was her solution.

They hit it off, Susan’s solution isn’t working for some reason cuz she doesn’t feel any relief at all and in fact feels worse but just sucks it up and just focuses on her work and looks the other way. Linda and Felix get married, Susan feels like throwing up the entire day and now feels somehow even more worse by now and suddenly whenever Linda wants to chat she’s suddenly always “busy” every time. Susan’s often busy anyways but you know yourself when there’s a difference between “shit I’m busy that day, let’s do Sunday instead” and “Sorry I can’t, I’m busy”, “I don’t know when I’ll be available.”

While Linda and Felix were dating, Susan probably assumed that she was just jealous that she couldn’t have a little fun at her age herself. When they got married, Susan told herself that she’s probably so depressed over it cuz it’s making her feel like she’s fallen behind others her age and that maybe she feels bitter that all of these people are moving on and going through these important life stages while she remains behind. Which made no sense otherwise cuz Susan couldn’t give any less of a fuck about starting any sort of family or going out. But that’s what Susan would tell herself that she feels so she wouldn’t have to think about it any further. By the time Susan thinks she’s over whatever it was, she begins having brief talks with Linda occasionally. Not often and still a bit distant, but way better than before.

So yeah can you imagine how shitty and guilty Susan felt that whole time of her weird bitterness toward Linda being in a relationship and not being able to approach her much anymore or how Felix turned out to be such a shitty husband.

If this headcanon is aligned with twf’s canon, she’d probably be dead before she even gets to actually acknowledge and accept her feelings as they are. Such is life though. Not like she could’ve done anything about it.

[kaicubus]

Being Jade West’s gf..

Warnings : none.

fem!reader x Jade West from Victorious

— — —

♡ In public Jade and in private Jade are completely different people.  People say she’s mean, impulsive, and sadistic, but really she’s sensitive, guarded, and actually pretty funny. 

♡ TONS of inside jokes to which you two look at each other in understanding without even saying anything.

♡ She has a major soft spot for you and you only ((maybe Cat too but who doesn’t?)).

♡ God help anyone who approaches you when she’s around, needless to say they definitely have a death wish.  Jade is so protective over you that the title of being her girlfriend alone is like an invisible barrier that vaporizes anyone from getting near you.  If someone needs to ask you a question they're going to have to as Cat to ask you, because there is no way in Hell that Jade’s going to let anyone do that. 

♡ If someone DOES get near you, close enough to talk to you, she’ll glare at them, hold her hands together and ask, “Oh great! Another mouth breather to cough his disgusting mouth germs on my girlfriend.” and basically humiliate him until he runs away crying.

♡ It’s not that Jade doesn’t trust you, she loves you, it’s the fact that she’s dated the other guys in school and she KNOWS that they’re all losers.  So, why waste your time when your wonderful and perfect punk girlfriend exists? 

♡ She tries to hide her jealousy around you but if you mention someone else’s name, guy or girl, she nearly gets whiplash with how fast she turns her head in anger.  “I thought you said you don’t talk to them!” She would say out of habit from dating Beck, but once she sees your concerned face she immediately settles down.  Yeah, you’re not like Beck in any way, Jade is your first in pretty much everything so she has absolutely nothing to worry about. 

♡ Lots and lots and lots of arm holding from both of you.

♡ She’s very demanding.  Like.  If she thinks you're not giving her enough attention, she’ll order you to give her it.  “Hold my hand.  Now.” and you happily oblige.

♡ When you guys are bored you’ll watch horror or slasher movies, of course your favorite being ‘Nightmares on Elm Street’ and hers being the indie movie classic ‘The Scissoring.’

♡ Dyeing a streak of your hair the same colors with Green Day blasting from a speaker in the bathroom ((it’s purple)).

♡ “O-Ow I think I got some in my eye.” “It’s purple dye, not pink eye, Y/n.” “JADE YOU AREN’T HELPING.”

♡ Of course, when Jade has a show or sings in general at Karaoke Dokie, you have front row seats and you're also easily subjected to her stares, grins, and winks. 

♡ Dates at Nozu because she knows you really like sushi even though she has annoying memories with Tori there.

♡ “I like your outfit today.” “Oh thanks.” “You're welcome.  Bye.”

♡ If you have an enemy and tell her you don't like that certain person, she will not hesitate to grab that person by the roots of their hair and cut a lock off with her favorite pair of scissors. 

♡ Your closet is hers and her closet is yours so a lot of your friends will ask, “Hey wasn't y/n wearing that last week?” and she’ll respond with, “Yeah and what’s it to you?  Got a problem? It’s a cute top, can’t I wear a cute top? Is it such a big deal that I LIKE this cute top? Like have you smelt it, clearly not because it smells EXACTLY like y/n.” “Nope I was JUST saying that it looked familiar.”

♡ One thing Jade loves doing is teaching you to stand up for yourself, if you aren’t already, she’ll teach you how to speak your mind and be less of a shy wallflower.  When the time comes where you do act with confidence, she does this thing where she folds her arms and grins, raising her eyebrows and letting out a proud chuckle at her work.

♡ “When are you going to start acting like this isn't a big deal?” “When are YOU going to get my coffee order right?” “Jade, not drawing a heart next to your name isn't going to mess up how the coffee tastes, just drink it.”

♡ You know that thing..THAT specific picture? Yeah, that’s how you do each others makeup.  You’re sitting on top of her and leaning down, lightly softening her brows and shes staring up at you trying not to laugh.  Actually I lied I’m a liar it’s actually a pretty sweet and intimate moment :)

♡ In a group setting with friends, Jade always insists you sit on her lap.  Only because she likes holding you and you like the feeling of her hand snaked around your waist, but also because it’s her way of telling everyone around you to ‘fuck off.’

♡ In addition to that, Jade will essentially grab your face and kiss you whenever possible.  Not showing annoying levels of PDA of course, but if there’s someone talking to you she’ll make an effort to show them who they’re dealing with.

“Who’s this, babe?” “Oh she’s my—”

♡ If you guys ever get into a fight, which is rare but not impossible, this girl will do whatever she can to make it up to you.  She may keep up a front when she’s mad or frustrated at you but behind the scenes shes working on finding the right solution to fix it because she genuinely cares so much about you. 

♡ ‘I love you’ fights never go sweetly and cutely, instead they always start off like that but quickly progress into screaming and screeching. 

♡ Give her cheek kisses. She would quite literally kill for them.

“What are you doing?”

“Kissing you?”

“...ok.”

♡ No one is allowed to interrupt you guys during lunch without a life or death reason, nothing is more important to her than lunch time with you.  If they do then they automatically get shut down with a death stare from Jade.

♡ “Y/n I have to tell you something.”

“Sure what’s up?”

“You remember your science teacher you didn’t like in middle school because he failed you on an assignment?”

“...Mr. Smith? Yeah?”

“I got him fired.”

“YOU WHAT—”

♡ She’s very reliant on your affection. 

♡ There’s a lot of tolerance in your guys’ relationship, for example : if you like a certain song she despises, she’ll complain about it first but then start to listen to it just because YOU like it.  She wouldn’t dare listen to it on her free time...unless?

♡ As far as kissing goes, she’s very passionate and she’s not afraid to show it.  She’ll rub her hands up and down your hips and waist and lean into you like you’re some drug she can’t get enough of. 

♡ Other times, she’s sweet and reassuring — though quiet enough so that no one else can hear because that would ruin her evil reputation >:(

♡ She’s 90% clingy and 10% violent, meaning she will bite you out of the blue.

[thatdeadaquarius]

i swear, i WAS going to leave you alone for the rest of the day. I thought 'oh no, you've bothered them enough for the day, wait until tomorrow' (they did not, in fact, wait until tomorrow) however i had thoughts and wanted to share them with you! 😊

concept: I was scrolling through some of your previous posts for a second time today (still all very cool and awesome btw) and the one about the reader saying swear words without knowing what they are kinda stuck with me.

So lets reverse it! You, the creator, fall into teyvat and CAN speak the common language there, while also still remembering your own native language. and so your native tongue becomes super holy to them (eg. 'omg, the creator is speaking in their holy tongue, lets all listen and nod')

Unfortunately, this has its drawbacks, especially because the majority of the times you speak in your native tongue you are cussing out everyone.

3 potential scenarios have stemmed from my brain because of this.

You getting annoyed at your worshippers and yelling at them, then afterwards they all thank you for blessing them

Swearing so often that the people around you start to pick up on the words and now all of your worshippers are parroting swear words at really important events, while you try and keep a straight face

Accidently teaching one of the kids swear words and then klee starts saying 'fuck' all the time and the adults are all like 'thank you for teaching klee one of your divine words, it truly is a blessing. what does it mean though?' and you're just sitting there like 😅

also thanks for being so nice about my shenhe post :) i love her so much <33

NOO dont worry abt it!! Ill just answer whenever i got the time!! I definitely dont mind multiple asks from the same person dw bby 👍✨️

Here, a cookie for ur time 🤲🍪 PSPSPSSPSPS ITS WORKING THEIR COMING IN, I ALSO HAVE CAKE AND DRINKS!! :D

So this is gonna sound demanding,, BUT SHARE YOUR CONCEPTS AND IDEAS WITH ME ALWAYS YES YES I WANT TO BE THE FIRST TO SEE IT YALL R FEEDING MY SOULLL 🛐

This reverse is so much funnier than the OG way, you have such a BIG BRAIN👏👏

Those scenarios had me fucking laughing my ass off, the BLESSING THEM 😭KLEE 😭 PLEASE-

Also this might be ass writing bc I can’t get rid of my headache rn :/

___________

Look what you've done.

It was so harmless at first, teaching Amber a word or two there bc she was curious abt ur accent,

The reveal that Teyvat's language wasn't your native language.

But that was still manageable, that was still okay

From Amber, to Eula, to Venti, to Kaeya, to Rosaria, to Diluc, to Jean, that information spread slowly but surely

After all, you didn't use it often, no one here in Teyvat even vaguely recognized it (not even a vague similarity from one of the other countries even)

It wasn't like,, shocking to the majority of Mondstadt's residents that you had a different native lang. (nor any of the other countries once they realized you were here, and had a diff native lang.)

I mean, you were the Creator,

why wouldn't there be some ancient powerful holy lang. that only you (or along with some lucky priest/vessel/follower) could understand?

.

..

However, it did become a problem when you, as the human experience dictates, got irritated 

You see, Teyvat isn’t an easy world to get used to, from the elemental reactions, the huge amount of hostile/active flora and fauna, there was a lot of room (even as favored as you were as the Creator) for accidents

You had already had a few mishaps, asking the waiter to bring you some salt bc ur table didnt have any on accident, bumping into the allogenes who wanted to walk around with you that day when they stopped abruptly

...

But now you can confidently say you can pinpoint the inciting incident in hindsight.

You had been traversing Liyue, and of course, it’s very rocky, even the well beaten paths outside Liyue Harbor were littered with pebbles and stones

So bc theyre respectful sweethearts, Shenhe, Xiao, Zhongli, Ganyu and the rest of the Adepti wnated to have a calm brunch at Cloud Retainer’s Abode w/ u <3

On the way up, bc u insisted normal walking was fine- no Xiao you want to see the sights teleportation isn’t necessary right now- nO Shenhe, really, the walk will be good for you, you don’t need to be carried-

Zhongli. 

You are supposed to be a mortal these days, not a 60 meter/feet long dragon- 

WHAM (u were so busy telling them to quit it that u werent watching ur path, aint none of their thousands of years old reflexes good enough to save u from being a clumsy fuck)

and your on ur ass.

“Fuck, ow,” immediately Shenhe has swept you up, Ganyu is rambling nervously, Xiao jumped but hasn’t said anything, but you can feel his worry from how tense he is, Zhongli’s hands are hovering, unsure if he should touch, and Shenhe- Shenhe- you can’t breathe- 

“Fuck guys stop, I’m fine-”

They;re eyes widen, Zhongli looks a little happier?? wtf all u did was-

oh no.

...

Now, everytime you have dinner with any of the Liyue characters they bow their heads, and in unison “Fuck guys stop I’m fine”

...

And it just got worse.

Bc you spent a few weeks in Liyue, and you had a lot of events to attend, little incidents like this happened everywhere

“Shit!” you drop a tea cup

“Damnit” some miner guy in town dropped his pickaxe loudly

You blame Zhongli and Ningguang.

Fuckers wanted to make sure they showed you utmost respect, so they both remembered every. single. word. of your language you have ever said around them.

Between Zhongli’s memory and elegant appearance, and Ningguang’s influence, your cuss words spread overnight

Families are now sitting around their dinner and thanking you for Teyvat’s bounty of food, “Thank you Creator for our meal, fuck guys stop I’m fine.” the kids and everything 💀

Liyue literally has become the most dirty mouthed city overnight, and they look SO PROUD OF IT  😭 😭

u never telll any of them LMAO

It’s a little rough, but I hope u got smth nice outta this, ur idea was so good I didn’t even wanna add anything but I wanted to show my appreciation for sharing those with me lol 

TYSM FOR SHOWING UP AGAIN!!

Cheers,

🌒🌊🌧Aquarius♒️🌌🌘

[inamagicalhallucination]

okay like i said earlier, here's my favorite parts from my fic kldfjakldsfj (the one i posted a week (?) ago) that had me giggling as i wrote them so now i have to share them specifically or i'll die

its a lot tho lmao so scroll away if u must

starting of strong

(i am 100% gonna try to write a fic that's just this part)

"He briefly considered Higuchi, who wasn’t up there with Gin and the Jinko, but higher than say: Tachihara. But she was rather strange.

She was always all red and squealy; she had gotten an interest in boss-secretary romances for a while now, and no matter how many subtle hints he sent that that was an awful thought, she did not get it. Either way, he made the resolve to keep her away from Mori, as best as he could. It wasn’t hard, of course, since the chain of command meant that she usually reported to him or Chuuya-san, whom Ryuunosuke, himself, reported to. Either way, it was clear her sense of romance was distorted." "

/

"So he did what any sensible man would do. He hoarded his room with non-perishable snacks and drinks. Then he locked himself in. Unfortunately, Gin, the traitor, had called Chuuya and Chuuya had physically forced Ryuunosuke’s door open – by breaking it. And then he had dragged Ryuunosuke from where he hid under his bed when he first heard Chuuya’s voice. He dragged him kicking and screaming, dodging all of Rashomon’s attempts at freeing her human from Chuuya’s grip."

/

"“Cr-” Chuuya choked out, “crushes? What crushes? I don’t have crushes! In fact, I have a not crush!”

“Chuuya-san,” Ryuunosuke replied, concerned, “do you hear yourself when you speak?”"

(10 bucks and i write kunichuuzai whilst sskk drama is going on)

/

"He just had to figure out what to bribe Ranpo with. Ryuunosuke did not think the shipment of cocaine he had just dealt with during a mission would suffice. This was unfortunate as it was something Ryuunosuke already had in hand."

/

“Okay, sure. I'm only here because Atsushi likes you or whatever.” 

Ryuunosuke’s heart started acting up and he made a mental note to bring it up during his next doctor's appointment. 

“I don’t like you,” Tanizaki continued, aiming Ryuunosuke with a glare. Perhaps it would have affected Ryuunosuke, but he was still concerned about his new heart problems. Knowing he could be dying from a lung disease was bad enough, now heart problems?"

/

" The Jinko was wearing his usual stupid cat-boy business attire but Ryuunosuke decided to not comment on it."

/

"Ryuunosuke closed his eyes and for a second pretended that the warmth of Atsushi’s presence was something he could deserve.

When he opened them, he knew he did not. " (i sent this to like 3 different ppl after writing it)

/

all of atsushi's dialogue about feeling like an idiot for thinking he could be loved

/

"“ I will only love you too much!” Ryuunosuke shouted, startling Atsushi. “I will love you, I will take and take and take every single speck of you in my selfishness and I will never be able to give you anything that can even dare to stand next to that. In my heart, body, and soul, I will hold you and no matter how much you want to be let go off, I will not be able to. Atsushi you have to know, the only thing I am good for is taking. I take and take, and I will take and take until there is nothing left of you, can you not understand?”"

/

"“You misunderstand me,” Ryuunosuke said, trying to force the words out. It was better this way. “I ignored you on purpose.” "

/

"For the record though, most people have feelings.”

“I do not believe you.” 

/

"“Akutagawa Ryuunosuke,” Atsushi’s voice was hard, “please refrain from thinking of me as a thing.”"

/

*copies and pastes all the dialogue from their (unnecessary) fight*

[happysparklingshadows]

𝚂𝚑𝚊𝚞𝚗𝚊 𝚂𝚑𝚒𝚙𝚖𝚎𝚗 𝙷𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚌𝚊𝚗𝚘𝚗𝚜 ('𝟿𝟼)

𝙶𝚎𝚗𝚎𝚛𝚊𝚕 𝚂𝚑𝚊𝚞𝚗𝚊 𝙷𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚌𝚊𝚗𝚘𝚗𝚜

♡ Shauna is a Libra Sun and Aries Rising 

♡ Shauna’s favorite color is blue. When Shauna was in elementary school with Jackie, Jackie bought her a best friend necklace with a blue and pink heart. Jackie bought it for her to pick but really wanted the pink one, and Shauna always picked the blue one. Blue has always been her color ever since. 

♡ Shauna is a Dog person. Shauna gives off she is a Big Dog mom vibes. Shauna is distant with her emotions but very close with dogs. She just has a special connection to them. She always points out a dog in public (never approaching the owner just to say hi) and cries every time a dog dies in a movie. But at the same time, Shauna doesn't seem to be a person who would want an pet but she just likes the look of them.

Shauna's spirit animal is the Rabbit.

♡ Shauna is a stone-cold introvert. She doesn’t like meeting new people, she doesn’t like talking to people she is not prepared to speak to, and she doesn’t like trying new things. Shauna never complains about it or doesn’t do things if they are out of her comfort zone if you want. She would go to dances and dates in public, but she was shy. 

♡ Shauna’s favorite food is a little basic, but she doesn’t give a fuck. She fucking loves a good burger and some fries. She doesn’t care if an egg is on top, tomatoes, mayo, mustard, lattice, whatever. 

♡ Shauna's childhood could have been more stable, to be honest. Shauna’s mom and Dad divorced after her mom gave birth to her youngest brother, Ian. Shauna is the oldest Daughter of two younger brothers,  and her mom is constantly working at her job at the hospital to keep them all afloat. Shauna’s dad wasn’t perfect, and she always knew he wasn’t a good dad; he was an alcoholic and couldn't get his life together. When Shauna was 13, her dad remarried, started a new family, and stopped seeing them all. Shauna was always fed and had clothes on her back, but she has always been responsible for her brothers and the house when her mom was at work. All her life, she has played second mom, and she isn’t even mad at her mom because she can’t help that she needs to pay bills, but it is her dad’s fault for all of it.  That is why Shauna was so taken in by Jackie, and somewhat why she was envious of who Jackie was, because she had a perfect life, and she was perfect. Shauna never even had a chance to be perfect in her eyes. 

♡ Shauna’s sex drive is pretty high, wanting sex every other day. She wants to just hold you and touch your skin almost always. She is a soft Top! 

♡ Shauna’s biggest vice is Drinking at a party. Shauna is from a family that I feel has some addiction problems because she is usually quiet about Natalie’s drug use and defends her without being close to her at that party. I think Shauna has an issue with finishing every drink she is given. She has to see the bottom of the cup, but when she is not partying, or it’s in the settling to drink, Shauna never drinks. 

♡ ⚠️Unpopular opinion⚠️ Shauna really doesn’t like confrontation all that much. When Shauna fights someone, it feels like she is in a corner. Shauna isn’t always the friendliest, but she doesn’t like fighting people, especially with you. Shauna would be so sweet to you, and only you, like she will never put up a fight unless it is really needed. 

𝙳𝚒𝚏𝚏𝚎𝚛𝚎𝚗𝚝 𝙰𝚄s/𝚄𝚗𝚒𝚟𝚎𝚛𝚜𝚎s

♡ Royalty AU! Shauna would be your Gaurd for you because, of course, you would be the princess in the Royalty AU! Shauna is just someone that doesn’t seem like they would be the most crucial player in a royal court or even really fit in, so I see her as an outsider who is welcomed there like a guard or food taster. 

♡ Delinquent AU! Streetracer, Shauna has a lot of built-up rage inside her, and she is just an adrenaline junkie. The minute she got her license, she always started to speed, and it started by going a few miles over until it was her going 120 mph down the highway. She doesn’t care. She might even steal parts to make her own racecar like “Fast in the Furious.”

♡ Supernatural AU! Vampire. She likes the taste of blood in YJ Canon. She licks the blood on her fingers when she cuts the meat in the show.  

♡ Superhero AU! Black Widow because they are emotionally distant and checked out to live in their environment. Like Black Widow is stupid intelligent, hot, and strong, just like Shauna. 

♡ College AU! English Major with a Minor in Sex and Gender Studies. Shauna is very quiet and shy. She would be so scared to talk to the professor after class about an assignment. She doesn’t join clubs until the sophomore year of her college career, and she doesn’t go to parties much.

𝙿𝚛𝚎-𝙲𝚛𝚊𝚜𝚑 𝙷𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚌𝚊𝚗𝚘𝚗𝚜

♡ Shauna is the one in middle school to be the first to introduce that she likes you romantically, and you did the same. I feel like Shauna needs a little reassurance regarding romance because she doesn’t believe anyone would love her for her. 

♡ Shauna really likes to read and write a lot. She likes to have sleepovers with you to share the poems she found that made her think of you, she will read you the ones she wrote about you, and she likes to spend time together quietly. She likes to do the ADHD parallel quality time thing when you two do your own things. 

♡ Dates with Shauna consisted of going to parks and walking around with your hands holding. She likes to go outdoors and have fresh air while spending time with you alone. She likes the privacy of being together on a walk. No one else really listens to what you are saying. 

♡ Shauna is the more Avoidant partner. Shauna would avoid you when you start dating so she doesn’t disappoint you. When you confront her about that, she corrects her avoidant tendencies. Shauna needs her alone time, and she gives you your own alone time. She likes that you two are comfortable enough to give space, unlike her relationship with Jackie. 

𝚆𝚒𝚕𝚍𝚎𝚛𝚗𝚎𝚜𝚜 𝙷𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚌𝚊𝚗𝚘𝚗𝚜

♡ You and Shauna are in a Trio friendship with Jackie. And instead of Jeff, Shauna and you have lied to her for months about your relationship. Like Jackie BBQ canon, it always happens, but it wouldn’t be because Shauna is pregnant because she is in a WLW relationship. 

♡ Shauna always gives you the first cut of meat because she loves you. She gives you a piece with extra fat and lets you have her more gristle pieces of meat if you like them. 

♡ Shauna is very pointed and gives an attitude about your sleeping bag being away from hers, like Jackie. I imagine that scene when Shauna goes to the attic with Taissa against Jackie’s wishes. I feel like they are like that to each other. Shauna wants you to sit next to her, to be by her when she is sleeping, and she doesn’t like the idea that you are away from the cabin without her with you.  Becomes very protective. 

♡ Shauna becomes slightly more relaxed about sex but is still the same high sex drive girl she was before the crash. She really loves you, and she just wants to spend time together. She is a lot more into kissing you, and she is more into making love than just straight-up fucking.