#SW is just so...normal seeming through most of it

[hyunsvngs]

𝐩𝐢𝐱𝐢𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐜𝐞 - modern royalty au!lee felix x female reader

wc: 10.4k

rating: 18+. MDNI

cw: idiots in love (AND THEY FINALLY ADMITTED IT!), no use of y/n, sickeningly sweet pet names (again), felix is really in love and also horny as fuck, mc is thinking about sex 24/7, mentions of nausea but no vomiting, smut warnings under the cut!

synopsis: you and your best friend completed the main objective of your royal lives - your arranged marriage. you’ve both finally confessed your love to each other, and it seems that nothing can go wrong��� until the public’s opinion of you becomes clear.

a/n: THE FINAL PART OF FAIRY FLOWERS. I PROMISE YOU THIS HAS A HAPPY ENDING AND IS REALLY CUTE AND SMUTTY AND FLUFFY. THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR SUPPORTING THIS SERIES AND I HOPE YOU LOVE THIS PART AS MUCH AS THE OTHERS :D

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

sw: oral (m&f receiving), d/s dynamics (both fulfil both roles at some point, but never anything too heavy), INTENSE BREEDING KINK, panty sniffing but they’re still on, pet names in bed, unprotected sex, creampies, slight degradation (he calls mc stupid in bed), squirting

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

“How long?”

Felix hummed, brushing his fingers through your hair. He’d been trying to plait some daisies that he’d picked from the meadow into the locks, but he’d given up halfway through. “Forever.”

You sniffed. You’d been crying for what felt like hours, since Felix had confessed to you and taken you back to your room to lay down. You’d since wrapped up warm in pajamas again and were taking the day to yourselves. You both had a lot to process, after all. “Me too, Pixie.”

You could almost feel Felix vibrating with excitement. “I’m sorry, but I have to say - we are both really fucking dumb, sugarplum.”

You giggled, nodding against his chest where you were laying. 

“I was so over the moon when you agreed to marry me. I don’t know what I would’ve done if it hadn't been you. I just didn’t know how to tell you, I was so scared of ruining the friendship and what we had, and then… you gave me that book,” he finished. He’d said it all in one breath, and he was now almost panting. “I knew then. Or, I thought I knew. I decided I’d risk it anyway and confess, and I had this whole elaborate thing planned. But then you left!”

You groaned, moving to lay so you were looking up at him on his chest. “You can kind of blame Chan for that. He told me you’d read the book, and then you denied it, so then I thought… I thought you’d read it, and then decided I was a freak or something and didn’t want to say anything to me about it.”

Felix shook his head, smiling softly. “I think it’s one of the bravest things you’ve ever done. I was so proud of you when I had finally processed everything, sugarplum.”

You grinned back, leaning up to press a soft kiss against his lips. You loved that you could just fucking do that now, and it was normal. 

“Do you wanna hear the confession? Like, what I had planned?”

“Um, do I? Of fucking course! Tell me, tell me!” You shrieked. You positioned yourself so that your leg was swung over his thighs, fingers dancing up his hoodie to rest on his abs in a moment of non-sexual intimacy. Your Prince still shuddered anyway. 

He took a deep breath. “Okay, so. I was going to take you to our meadow at sunset, and I was going to already have a daisy chain made for you. I had plans to put some little lanterns around on a picnic blanket and have some fruit there for us to pick at and eat. I was going to tell you that there was one quote that really stuck with me in the book, when Knightley says ‘if I loved you less-‘“

“‘I might be able to talk about it more.’ It’s my favorite quote. Cliche, because it is the most famous, but it’s just beautiful, isn’t it?” Felix hummed in agreement. You started to trace circles on his soft, tanned skin. 

“It’s my favorite too. It reminded me of you. If I had loved you less, I wouldn’t be so scared about risking everything, and I could’ve told you. I could’ve told you that I love you, and everything would’ve been so much easier,” Felix confessed. Your heart felt like it was about to burst with love. You’d compared you and Felix to Emma and Mr. Knightley, and Felix had done the exact same. “Anyway, I really thought about that, and I made you a daisy chain. It’s probably wilted now, but I was going to give it to you. The wedding ring means we’re married, yeah, but a daisy chain is just so us, isn’t it? That’s more of a show of love to me.”

“Not sure I would’ve understood your confession from just a daisy chain and a quote, Pixie, but sure-“

“I’m not done!” Felix yelled. You chuckled, motioning for him to continue. He sighed, looking deep into your eyes. “Anyway, I was going to say all of that, and then I was going to kiss you, like super romantically. Then, I would tell you that I loved you and that I always have loved you, sugarplum. I know it’s simple, but-“

You surged forward, pressing your lips to his. Felix let out a small squeak in surprise, but quickly took it in his stride, using his left hand to tuck your hair behind your ear. 

You couldn’t be happier. You’d finally got him - and you didn’t feel selfish at all.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

“I’m so… fucking… pissed.” Felix was panting at the door to your bedroom. Your shared bedroom, may you add. You wanted to twirl your hair and kick your feet every time you remembered it. You slept together here, amongst… other things. Looking up from your book, you blinked at him. Reading Pride and Prejudice for the umpteenth time hadn’t been boring at all to you - there was always something in you that made you obsess over Mr. Darcy. He was the dream, seriously. Well, the fictional dream. Your dreams coming to life existed in the form of your best friend, now husband, all small frame and bleached hair of him.

He was out of breath, sweating, immediately stripping his shirt off to throw it on the floor. You furrowed your eyebrows in confusion. Why was he so disheveled? “Lixie… did you run here?” 

“Yes,” He whined, throwing himself on top of you on the couch. You’d lit the fireplace in the room and perched on the couch in your most comfortable clothes for the day. You’d had nothing else to do, no duties. Being a Princess now meant you had so much to do all the time, so it was a welcomed change by you to be able to just lounge around comfortably in an oversized shirt and underwear, nothing else. He laid on top of you, disturbing the peace, but his limbs splayed everywhere on top of your body was also welcomed by you. “I’m so mad, I just had to run!”

“Okay,” You hummed, slotting the bookmark into your book and shutting it, putting it on the floor. You tried to stay calm, hoping that your energy would rub off on your husband and calm down the temper that he was in. Felix grabbed your hand and put it in his hair, and you dutifully started scratching. It had become so comfortable to be in a relationship with him, to be married to him for real - there were no other changes, except for the fact that you now had sex - a lot - and slept in the same bed every night. You could even kiss him without shame, which was another fact that you had yet to process. “Do you wanna tell me why you’re so pissed off then, or…?”

He mumbled something incoherently into your chest, making your ears perk. What? Seriously, he was so frustrating - just speak up! You chided yourself. He was in a bad mood, over whatever it was, and it’s totally not his fault that he’s feeling a little nonverbal about it.

“Sorry, what? I can’t hear you, Pixie.”

Felix raised his head slightly, turning to face the flickering fireplace but staying rested on your chest. The fireplace lit up his features, highlighting high cheekbones and pouty lips with a defined cupid’s bow. He got more beautiful every time you saw him, especially with his exposed tan skin at that moment - the flames from the fireplace made him look warm toned, like the sweet cup of coffee you like to help yourself to in the morning. Energising and tempting. You wondered, rather inconsiderately, if you could jump his bones after he’d vented to you. You still had your legs crossed from the moment he entered the room, back pressed up against the armrest and legs obscured with a thick, fluffy blanket. He hadn’t even noticed you were clad in only an oversized bed t-shirt with your underwear underneath, your legs and the blanket covering the exposure.

“It’ll make you sad, I think. I’d hate to make you sad, sugarplum,” He whispered, almost solemnly. You hummed again. Maybe it would make you sad, but if it would make your Prince feel better, you wanted to know. You voiced this statement and he sighed almost immediately. “Okay. People are getting a bit unhappy with the royal family. You’re not really a noble, and people have been… considering you the servant’s daughter, I guess. I dunno. People have also clued in to our marriage being arranged, even though we’re denying it completely, so… They’re angry. Yeah, they’re fucking pissed, sugarplum.”

The rage hit you at once. You shut your eyes. They’re angry? You’re fucking angry. How dare they speak down on you like that? You’ve had years of etiquette training, the same fucking education as their prized Prince. You knew him better than anyone else. You wanted to scream. It had made you frustrated at Felix, when it wasn’t his fault at all. 

The heat of the fireplace was now lighting your own fire, deep inside your heart that made you want to lash out against anyone that wasn’t Felix. You knew Felix, knew he would’ve done everything to stand up for you. You weren’t doubtful of that in the slightest. He’d wrap you up in cotton wool even if there was only one person saying you were slightly annoying.

Felix sat up, waving his hand in front of your face. “Hello? You didn’t say anything. Are you upset…? Oh God, you’re sad, I’m so sorry-“

“Lix, shut up,” You blurted. He looked at you with the signature deer in the headlights look. You sighed. “Sorry, baby. I’m pissed off, not upset, and I’m not pissed off with you. I’m pissed off with them.”

Felix looked relieved, nodding and falling down against your chest again. “It’s so not fair, right?! They don't get to decide. We gotta show them, show them you’re exactly the right person.”

“Does it matter what they think, realistically?”

“Um, yes,” Felix scoffed. “Remember that one film we watched where they tried to overthrow the government?”

“Pixie, please tell me you’re not talking about The Hunger Games. This isn’t even a government?”

“I totally am referring to that, yeah! It’s like… you’re Katniss, sugarplum. I’m Peeta, right, except way better looking, no offence to him, and I’m a Prince. Everyone loves me, and you’re Katniss. You’re super cool, and sexy, and smart - but then the public just thinks you're evil. The public is… President Snow! Oh my God, this totally makes sense,” He was out of breath at the end, eyes wide.

You held back a laugh. “This is the strangest metaphor you’ve come up with to date, baby.”

“It makes sense though. Okay, no,” Felix shook his head. “I’m being really dramatic.”

“Well, yeah-“

“Shu’up!” He whined, thrashing around on top of you. “Okay, I know I am being dramatic! But, I just want them to love you. I want them to see what I see, you know? You’re perfect.”

His voice was quiet, heartfelt. You let a small laugh come out then, kissing his head. You had to subdue the tension, make a joke in order to make him relax a little. “I hope the public don’t all wanna fuck me, Lix.”

Felix was immediately upright, reaching down to tickle you punishingly. It was your turn to thrash around, trying to kick him, trying to do anything - you hated when he tickled you, but to be honest, you had been winding him up by trying to lighten the mood. It had been your whole goal, really, and you hadn’t thought of the consequences.

He eventually fell back on the couch, his back up against the armrest opposite the one you’d been leaning on. He threw his legs, still clad in dress trousers, over yours. Felix huffed a deep breath, and you were still panting, letting out random giggles reminiscent of the ones you’d emitted when he was tickling you. “You’re right.”

“Huh?” You heaved a loud, obnoxious breath out, still smiling. “Right about what?”

Felix smiled, that silly smile he does when he’s about to make a stupid statement. “I do wanna fuck you. All the time, actually. You drive me fucking crazy, sugarplum.”

You raised an eyebrow. You were going to wipe that stupid smile off of his face. You’d felt way more confident, comfortable in your own skin since you and Felix had confessed to each other and he’d wholly struggled to keep his hands off of you, even in public. You kicked the blanket off of your legs, exposing the exposed skin, and Felix’s face dropped. He stared at your legs, bare and with soft skin from the lotion you used when you showered, and his eyes widened when you spread your legs. Your core was clad with just a pair of white expensive lace underwear - some way overpriced brand that Chan’s wife had recommended to you - and you could see Felix’s gaze drop to the space between your legs. An immediate blush rose to his cheeks, crimson settling underneath the fawn freckles scattered around olive skin.

“You’ve- I… You’ve just been… like that? This whole- this whole fucking time? Baby, sugarplum, my Queen…” He was immediately moving, face moving to settle between your legs and presumably nose at the soft lace. You gripped his soft hair softly, pulling his head back and making him let out a groan before he could even meet the fabric with his button nose. “B-Baby?”

“What are you doing, Lix? You can’t just accost your wife like that,” You scoffed. His eyes were soft, looking up at you. It was new, you two playing like this - honestly, you’d only just become confident enough to key into some of your more innate desires. You loved the teasing, the push and pull, whether it was you or your Prince on the receiving end.

“Lemme eat you out, yeah? Yeah? Please, sugarplum?” He huffed, his tongue peeking out to lick over his bottom lip. Felix’s eyes were darting around, landing on you, on the fireplace, on your covered pussy. Your folds had already started to slick up with your Prince looking so vulnerable, his dark doe eyes panicked and weak. “I know you like it when I do. You love my lips, I know you do. Let me eat you out, and then I’ll… I’ll…” He was trailing off.

You smiled softly, encouraging him. “And then you’ll what, Pixie?”

Felix let out a deep groan, rasping out straight from his chest, your fingers still tight around the soft strands of sandy hair. His roots had started growing out, chestnut brown hair adding to the mix of blonde shades. You loved his blonde mullet, but a part of you missed Felix with his long, dark hair too. “I’ll fill you up. Make you a mommy, yeah? Everyone will know you’re perfect then, if we make an heir… can I? Can I cream in that sweet pussy after you ride my face, sugarplum? Will you let me?”

Your chest heaved, your breathing coming out in thick pants like a fucking dog. Your pussy felt like it was going to drip all over the couch and leave a stain that would be extremely hard to explain to the maids. You managed to nod, a small, overly timid nod that was completely the opposite of how you’d been speaking and acting. Lithe fingers dropped from the strands of hair, and Felix’s face was immediately between your legs.

“Can’t believe this… this sweet pussy was almost fucking out, this whole time, and I’ve been- fucking going on, I’ve been ranting, and I could’ve been tasting you, oh my God,” Felix whined, deep breaths flooding over your clothed core. You moaned, saccharinely sweet. The feeling of the warm flames from the fireplace had made you feel relaxed and toasty, but now you were warm for a different reason. The arousal was building deep in your tummy as Felix nuzzled his nose against your folds, inhaling deeply at the smell of your pussy. The scent of your wetness flooded his senses. It was primal, desperate, and he was whining again when he licked a wide stripe over the fabric, sodden with your arousal. “Mm, yeah. Nice and sweet for me, sugarplum. Always so nice and sweet for me.”

“Taste it then. Properly, Pixie,” You demanded. Unperturbed, he nodded in agreement, sighing with another deep breath when his fingers hooked into the underwear to pull them down your legs. To be honest, they were a sorry excuse for underwear, barely covering anything. You just liked the way the soft, thin lace felt against your skin, and clearly Felix liked them too. When your pussy was exposed to the warm air, Felix was immediately moaning out loudly, face diving into your folds. He ate you without abandon, shoving his tongue between your folds to lick you up of all of your arousal, nose buried in the softness that met him there. 

Felix pressed open mouth kisses against your clit, swirling his tongue around the small bundle of nerves. You felt his thumb reach up to pull your pussy back, exposing your clit from underneath the hood to the warm air of the room. He was immediately latched onto it, sucking hard, and you whined loudly. Your orgasm was already building steadily, a white hot heat twisting in your gut at the way he was making out with your cunt filthily. He was smearing his spit everywhere, licking it up and making you flood his mouth messily with your juices.

“Oh God, I’m already- fuck- ‘m already getting close, Pixie, Lix, Lix, Felix, please-“ He nodded against your folds, pulling back to spit messily on your clit and smear it around with his fingers. He used two fingers on the same hand to press at your hole, entering you seamlessly and making you thrash around at the feeling of being full. His fingers were short but God did they feel good when he had you like this, spread out, pliant for him with only a few commands to make your Prince please you just right.

You held his head close to you, making him moan at the feeling of being commanded to make you cum. His fingers pistoned steadily in and out, and you hoped vaguely that it was in preparation for his cock to enter you - not that you needed any preparation with the way his lips were sliding around your pussy messily. You found yourself bouncing back onto his fingers, letting out whines and whimpers when he sucked your clit just right.

All of a sudden, like a sudden crescendo, your orgasm hit you. It hit in what felt like a burning, ecstatic full hour in which you thought you may ascend to the high heavens, dripping hole clenching around your Prince’s fingers tightly as you came. Your jaw dropped in a loud moan, one hand pushing Felix’s head further into you - although it was impossible - and the other digging into the armrest behind you in lieu of letting out the passion you felt. You thrashed, whining out as your orgasm went on, and on, until you were left a panting mess on the couch, sweat slicked back sliding around where your shirt had ridden up in your flurry of movement.

Felix pulled away when your hand on his head went slack, licking his lips. Despite his efforts to clean them up, his lips were still covered in a sheen from your juices and looked plush and ruined. His cheeks blushed, forehead just slightly sweaty. With a quick movement, he was kissing you, flicking his tongue against the seam of your mouth so it parts to allow his tongue inside, you letting out a little sigh once your tongues meet. 

He kept kissing you, a filthy exchange of tongues and spit over and over again, building the arousal back up in your gut like the formation of an avalanche. You could taste your orgasm on his lips, making you moan, stifled by his mouth. By the time your lips separate, he’s looking at you expectantly with flushed cheeks and you’re out of breath, staring back at him.

“You gonna pump me full, Lixie?” You whispered, your low tone making him scrunch his eyes shut and nod feverishly. He was unbuttoning his trousers with one hand, pushing them down lithe legs and throwing them on the floor. Just as quick as he’d rid himself of the offending fabrics, he was laying back on the couch in the position he had been prior to eating your pussy, erection straining heavily in his boxers. It looked painfully hard, a small patch of precum staining the black fabric even darker. 

“Ride me. Fuck, please, please, sugarplum. Ride me, please, all yours,” He was babbling, shifting up onto his forearms, and you managed to pull your t-shirt off on the way to straddling him. His hips were slender between the ample flesh of your thighs, and you felt powerful above him as he looked up at you, blonde strands staticy and splayed against the armrest. 

You teasingly ground into his bulge, staring down at him all the while, trying to prevent your eyes from rolling back into your head at the feeling. The fabric of his boxers was the perfect friction against your overstimulated clit, and his hands instantly went into your hips at the movement, gasping out. His hips thrusted up into you and jolted you slightly on his lap. 

“Want it inside, Pixie?” You heaved out a deep breath, making him nod. He’d started to babble again, little incoherent deep sentences. You ignored what he was saying, pulling down his boxers just enough to allow his length to emerge, red and leaking. “Oh, look at that. You look desperate.”

“I- I am,” Felix nodded determinedly. “Need your pussy, my Queen. God, please, just- oh my God-“

He was effectively silenced by you sinking down onto his length, wet hole embracing him in one slick slide. You let out a soft moan, rocking slightly to try and get your hole to accommodate the thickness that had breached you. He looked debauched, lips still wet and hands clutching your hips tightly as he let out deep moans and whimpers. 

You started to bounce once your pussy felt like it was burning with need, letting his thick cock fill you up over and over. The slaps of skin and wetness briefly made you feel embarrassed, but you ignored it, focusing on the blissful expression on Felix’s face.

“That’s-That’s so… so good, shit,” He panted, trying to let you take control and keep his hips still. It was difficult, that much you could see by the jilting of his hips every now and again. You leaned back on your hands, gripping his thighs for purchase as you rolled over his length at a steady pace. His eyes were lit up by the fire, images of flames in the whites of his eyes reflecting the deep need burning inside of him.

You were quickly losing all sense of rationality, hips faltering over him a few times as you struggled to keep your pace. “Feels- so fucking good, Lix, I-I-“ 

Your Prince shifted upright, nose just barely brushing against yours and the angle changing inside of you. Just a little more that way, you thought, and- there, that’s it, shit. You gasped when he brushed your g-spot, bouncing you slowly on his cock to just let his cockhead rest on that spot inside of you. Your eyes fluttered shut, hands moving to grip his shoulders tightly.

“It’s okay, sugarplum, I-I got you. That nice and deep, yeah? Yeah? Am I hitting it?” He mused, and you nodded eagerly, trying not to writhe around on top of him. “Think it’ll take?” You opened your eyes confusedly.

“T-Think what’ll take..?” 

“Me breeding you, sugarplum. Is the cock so good you’ve gone all stupid on me?” You moaned out at his choice of words, statements from your deepest desire making your hole clench nice and tight around him. He simply smiled fondly at you, letting his warm staccato breaths fan over your face. You felt yourself getting wetter as he started to lean back with you in his arms, keeping that same angle with his hips. “C’mere. Lay flat.”

You were confused again, but you trusted him, so you let him hold onto your waist tightly and shift you onto his front. You felt the ridges of his abdominal muscles press against your tummy, making you try to grind your clit up to gain stimulation from them. He simply cooed at you, soothing you with warm circles drawn on the small of your back before he was thrusting up into you frantically.

You were sure you’d screamed. It was so overwhelming like this, so deep, so thick, so full - you were contemplating if you could cum just from his cockhead bullying into your g-spot. It quickly became apparent to you after a few especially punishing thrusts that yes, you could.

Moving to start chasing your orgasm for the second time, you ground down against him, rendering him speechless as he gazed down at you. He still had you pinned to his chest with a firm grip, and with another shift of his hips he was fucking you at a frantic pace, matching the grinding you were giving him.

“Oh, Lix- Lix, I- I think I’ll-“

Felix nodded in the crook of your neck, watching your asscheeks bounce on his thighs as he took you hard, over and over. He was slurring into your skin. “I’m gettin’- getting fucking- so close, so close-“

“Keep- like that, like that, deep, deep! I’ll- oh my God, oh my God, oh my-“

Stars burst behind your eyelids and you screwed them shut tight, body shuddering in his tight hold as you came around his cock. You registered something wetter, a gush of fluids exploding from you in your orgasm, but you just continued to grind against him, clenching tight. 

Felix believed he had died in that moment. “Oh- Oh my God, it’s so wet- so, so, fuck, you squirted, you squirted, I’m-“ Felix was biting his lip hard, almost causing blood to form where his teeth pressed into the thicker section of skin. You kissed his cheek in a daze, eyes half lidded as you let him use your dripping cunt for his pleasure. “I’m gonna- I’m gonna fill you up, yeah, yeah, sugarplum- fucking squirted, so wet, so fuckin’ wet and tight just for me-“

His jaw dropped in a silent moan at the same second his hips halted mid-thrust. You saw his eyes fluttering, rolling back into his head just as he released inside of you with thick, hot spurts. You aided him in that moment, soft grinds to coax out the rest of his cum inside of you. He pinched your hips harshly when he was done, causing you to squeak and stop moving, gazing up at him. You knew you had heart eyes in that moment - he’d made you squirt, for fuck’s sake.

A beat passed, his cock softening inside of you. His eyes were still shut as he tried to catch his breath, hands falling to smooth up and down your thighs. You felt the puddle when you spoke. “I didn’t even know I could do that.”

Felix sighed. “Please do that all the time, sugarplum.”

After getting cleaned up, Felix had put out the fire and taken you to bed where he’d pulled the blanket over you. You felt sated, muscles relaxed as you stretched out your legs on the soft mattress. He sidled in next to you, throwing his arm over your middle and pecking your cheek cutely. 

“I love you, sugarplum. We’ll work on a game plan tomorrow, yeah?”

You hummed, eyes already feeling heavy. “Yeah. Love you too, Pixie.”

You felt content, pulling the blanket up to your chin and fluttering your eyes shut peacefully.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

You and Felix had a plan.

It echoed your previous plan, but made a smile come to your face when you realised this was one you had made together. You were going to make up a whole schedule, activities you could do simply such as donating to charity - which you’d already been doing, who has the need for that much money realistically? But this act of good needed to be continued - and the plan that had taken place a few days after you’d created it. 

Chan’s wife’s family was coming to visit. Being royals from a different kingdom, the whole town was celebrating and wanting to show off how amazing the town was to impress the other royal family. After all, they were part of your own royal family now, something that had greatly satisfied the public. Chan’s wife’s younger sister, a five-year-old Princess, was your main focus. Not only did you want to meet her anyway, Chan’s wife had decided it would be a great idea for you to go to the fruit orchard near the palace and pick some fruit together, the three of you.

You’d initially been apprehensive, given that Felix wouldn’t be present and you could be extremely fucking awkward when he wasn’t. But, she’d wanted to help, and she was favoured by the public too. It couldn’t help to have her in your company. That, and she’d become somewhat of a friend to you since the wedding. It felt weird to have real friends that weren’t Felix’s friends. It was something you were learning to embrace, and you tried not to overthink the actions you did after the outings.

You stood outside Chan and his wife’s chambers, next door to yours and Felix’s. It made you briefly recognise that you were very thankful that Felix hadn’t been next door to his mother, given what took place between the two of you on the regular. Chan wasn’t much of a better option though, with his teasing quips and boyish smile. You’d dressed nicely for the day, in a simple mid-length dress that was dark navy and long-sleeved, in case you got fruit juices on it. Felix had tried to jump your bones - for some unknown reason, the dress was probably the most conservative you’d ever worn - before you’d left but you’d managed to push past him with a teasing smile and a promise for ‘later’. 

Chan’s wife bustled out of the room, a small child in her arms who was wiggling around impatiently. The Princess, you assumed, with her chubby cheeks and big round eyes. Her features echoed her elder sister, but in a more youthful, innocent way. She was in a little pink dress, a white cardigan slung over her small shoulders. You grimaced internally at the thought of fruit smearing over the light fabrics.

“Hi! This is my sister, Nari. She’s a little quiet, but-”

“Hello,” The little girl spoke, waving at you with a chubby hand. “We’re getting fruits today.”

You giggled, waving back at the little girl. “Yeah, we’re gonna go get fruit, all of us. Are you excited, Nari?”

Chan’s wife blinked at the younger girl. “Well, she’s normally quiet, but clearly not today.”

You found the little girl trailing next to you on the way to the orchards, her small hand wrapped around yours. She insisted on not being next to her sister, and you honestly felt like the shiny new toy to play with for the child - but you were fine with it. She was really cute, and it made you wish you’d had some siblings of your own growing up. You didn’t even notice the public taking pictures of you on their phones, too engrossed with the little girl telling you about her recent adventure all the way to get here.

“It took two whole sleeps to get here! Did you know that?”

Chan’s wife looked at you, shaking her head fondly at the younger. “It wouldn’t have taken two whole sleeps, sweetie, but our mother said you insisted on napping in the car. Twice,” She turned to you. “It takes a few hours. At most.”

You nodded, trying to hold back a laugh, but the little girl carried on telling her story as if her sister hadn’t corrected her. You eventually arrived at the fruit orchards, somewhere you hadn’t been an awful lot. It was lined with peach trees, given that they were in season, and your mouth watered. You loved peaches. So did Felix, actually, and you made a mental note to grab yourself an overflowing wicker basket of the sweet fruit to share later on. 

Speaking of wicker baskets, your new friend had brought three, holding them in her hands dutifully. You assumed one was for her and Chan, one for you - and Felix, now - and one for Nari. 

Nari was still chirping happily alongside you about some other story, you weren’t sure which. She was definitely still in the hyperactive phase of childhood, bouncing from one story to another and telling you random facts from a completely different one. You found yourself nodding along still, letting out ‘ooh, really?’ at what seemed like the right time. Nari was satisfied, her smile growing wider the more that you contributed to her tall tales. 

Once you actually got set up, baskets in hands, Nari had run off to the other end of the orchard to grab some peaches off of a much lower tree, where she could just about reach on her tip-toes. You smiled, rather fondly. She really was cute. Just the sight of her in her smart little shoes and dress made you wish again that you had a sibling - or even a child of your own. It must be so beautiful to be able to spend time like this with a young mind. 

Chan’s wife shook her head, laughing when you started to make your way down to Nari. “You can leave her there to tire herself out. We can still see her,” She smiled at you. You nodded, still sparing Nari a glance. “I wanted to chat with you, anyway.”

Your chest tightened, mind racing. What could it be? Had she heard something from you and Felix last night?

“Nothing bad, sweetie. Don’t panic,” She admonished, watching your eyes widen. You turned away, starting to pick peaches from the trees and still sparing Nari a glance every now and again to make sure she was okay. She wasn’t more than six feet away from you, really, but you still felt a duty of care over the little girl. “So, I’m sure you’ve been wondering why my family’s visiting.”

You started to fill the basket, humming. She’d followed you, her slender hand, nails perfectly polished appearing in front of you to start grabbing the ripe fruit. “You mean it’s not for our incredibly famous peach orchard?”

She gave you a rewarding laugh. “Unfortunately, no. It’s being announced soon. That Chan’s abdicating,” Your hand halted on one of the round peaches. “I thought you should know, since you’re technically the most important person involved. No one really knows yet, but it’s coming, in a week or so. It means the coronation will also be quite soon.”

You blinked. The most important person involved? She sure thought highly of you. The greenery of the tree leaves had started to look jarring against the light pink of the peaches. “Ah.” You said, rather intelligently.

“Yeah, ah,” She chirped. She’d filled up her basket rather quickly, and had started to continue to fill yours while you just stared at the fruit. You were grateful, but the entire situation had you feeling slightly cornered, as if there were ulterior motives to you meeting. “The abdication will be announced, then the coronation will be announced pretty much a few days after, and then me and Chan will move back to my kingdom. For me to become Queen.”

“Are you nervous?” You blurted.

She let out another comforting laugh, nodding. “I’m really fucking nervous, to be honest. It’s something Chan has always encouraged me to do, though. He seems more than ready to leave Felix in charge of the throne of the kingdom. He thinks it’ll be in capable hands.”

You found yourself agreeing. That wasn’t something you could deny. “Felix loves this kingdom. He loves his people, and they really love him.” You sounded resentful at the end, and your friend picked up on it, elbowing you softly.

“Hey, don’t beat yourself up,” She chided you. “People have been taking so many pictures since we got here. They’re going to love you, sweetie. It just takes a bit of warming up. You know, maybe you could get knocked up or something, since it doesn’t sound to me like you’ve been struggling in that department-”

You squeaked, slamming your hand over her mouth in a flurry of movement. Being confident in the bedroom and being able to embrace that elsewhere was a difficult task to complete. Chan’s wife simply chortled behind your palm while your jaw was dropped at her choice of language, so common and straight up crude for a soon-to-be Queen. You couldn’t say much, actually. If anyone heard the language you and their beloved Prince used they’d probably have a heart attack and exile you both. Do people still exile? You realised you had to brush up on your modern royal knowledge, and you also realised you were still holding your hand over the woman’s mouth. Promptly dropping it, you scowled playfully.

“Okay. I guess I kinda had wondered if you’d heard us.”

“Oh, don’t get me started. I always wonder if you hear me and Chan when we-”

“Look, look! I got peaches,” Nari suddenly appeared next to you, barely carrying the basket that was only a quarter full. You almost laughed at the way the little girl had interrupted you, but instead leaned down to ruffle her hair. 

“Awesome, Nari. Shall we head back? We can wash them and then you can eat some, yeah?”

Nari nodded eagerly, eyes wide. Chan’s wife pinched her chubby cheek fondly, and all three of you set off home.

After having a very fun, satisfying day, you hoped the public would see you differently.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

Today was the day. It would be announced that Chan was abdicating. You’d helped Felix dye his hair a dark brown the night before, because apparently he needed a brand new hair colour when it’s announced that he’d be the new heir to the throne. 

You stood in the mirror the morning of the announcement, brushing sweaty palms down your loose, pastel blue dress. It was off-shoulder, a mid-length dress with a conservative a-line that you’d paired with some small black kitten heels. To be honest, you kind of thought that you looked as if you were going to an office job, but when Felix had placed his chin on your shoulder he’d insisted you looked ravishing. You thought he had to say that, or you wouldn’t be the one fucking him every night.

You’d arrived hand in hand to the main hall, smiling fakely at the cheers of the nobles and the selective part of the public that had arrived at the announcement. They didn’t even like you, so why the fuck were they cheering? You tried to push that thought to the back of your head, listening to the clicking of your heels as you and Felix both arrived on the stage, taking your seats off to the side. No one knew what this announcement was for, apart from the royal family and their staff. Not that that mattered anyhow - people were already bouncing off of the walls with excitement at Felix’s new hair colour. He’d given an award-winning Prince-like smile as he walked down the hall.

The hall was decorated accordingly, the kingdom’s designated colour splashed everywhere in the form of balloon garlands and ribbons. There were some splashes of violet, the colour of Chan’s wife’s kingdom. It was meant to be a happy announcement, judging by the way it had been promoted and decorated. It probably would be happy, with Felix’s popularity.

Speaking of Felix, his thumb stroked circles onto your hand. He turned to you and mouthed ‘you’ll be okay’, full lips forming over the words subtly. You believed him, because you believed everything your Prince said.

Chan took to the stand, a podium standing solely in the middle with a mic for him to speak into. Felix and Chan’s mother stood aside of him, crown structured on her head perfectly. Chan’s wife stood on the other side, giving the crowd an effortless, perfect wave. You wished you could be like her.

“Hello, everyone,” Chan spoke into the mic, giving a pearly white smile. “I’ve decided to be the one to give the announcement today. I hope that’s alright with you all?”

The crowd applauded, because of course they did. You fought the urge to roll your eyes, and instead gave a small clap yourself. Felix looked proud of you.

“I’m going to get to the point rather quickly, so that we can get to the festivities even quicker,” Chan giggled. A few murmurs and laughs were heard from the crowd in lieu of a response. “I’m sure it is common knowledge by now that my mother, your Queen, intends to abdicate in order to give me the title of King, before she gets older. I want to thank you all for the warm welcome you’ve given me in regards to this.”

Chan’s wife was rubbing soothing circles at the small of Chan’s back, over the intricately designed suit he was wearing. He was still giving his best smile, mouth formed as if it was the only thing he ever did - grin boyishly.

“I want to announce though, that I intend to also abdicate, too,” He spoke, and the crowd went quiet. “My wife belongs to her kingdom, and I’m nothing but a feminist. I want the best for my love, and as such, I wish for her to be the Queen of her own kingdom, rather than my Queen Consort. I hope you can understand and respect my decision.”

Another few murmurs were heard, a few people nodding solemnly. Felix got up right on cue, going to replace the Queen’s position on Chan’s side. It was time. You stayed in your seat. You thought you could remember that this is where you were meant to stay, until it was time to promote and smile in the festivities afterwards.

“Therefore, I wish to announce that my younger brother, Prince Felix, will be the heir to the throne. His coronation will take place in a few days. I understand this is fast for you all, but I hope you can accept the change with open arms. Thank you for everything you have done for me and my family.” His speech ended with a nod, and there was silence over the whole hall. You waited anxiously with bated breath.

Then, the whole crowd stood up to clap. You cringed slightly at the corniness of it all, but a royal family always had people feeling as though they were in a film. Everyone was cheering, applauding and laughing, happy that the young Prince who had done so much for them would be taking to the throne. Felix simply smiled, nodding and saying little ‘thank you’s in different directions to the crowd. He clapped his hands together triumphantly when Chan moved away, letting Felix take to the mic.

The crowd immediately went quiet, watching him expectantly. They still stood however, dressed in all their finery and looking a damn sight more comfortable in it than you thought you did. “Wow, thank you all for the praise,” He spoke, deep voice rasping over the speakers. You tried to ignore the way your stomach twisted at his deep tone. Now was not the time. “I want to thank you also for the support you’ve given towards my wife, soon to be the Queen Consort.” He motioned to you.

Oh, no. He was lying to their faces and there’s no chance in Hell they would deny it, is there? He was basically forcing their approval, forcing them to admit they liked you, all because you’d shown slight sadness at finding out they didn’t think you were worthy. He was doing it to make them praise you, make them appreciate you. It was kind of…

No, okay, it was really fucking sexy. Seriously, you groaned internally, do you ever stop thinking about sex?

“I appreciate it may have been difficult to understand when we got married. She’s not from a royal background like me, but she is of great poise and elegance. I personally can’t think of anyone better for my Queen Consort, and I’m sure you all agree,” You looked out at the crowd at his words, giving a soft wave. Surprisingly, you saw people start to nod and smile at you. Did your outing the other day work? Or did Felix’s speech just demand respect for you? Either way, you were pleased. 

You planned to show Felix just how pleased you were.

Later on, in the festivities, you even found the same noble from the night of your engagement party coming over to speak to you. He stood in front of you again, salt and pepper beard trimmed neatly. You blanched. He’d cornered you last time and you’d panicked. You’d have to do better this time. You stood with a plate of cheeses and fruit in your hand, having been picking at the selection since Felix abandoned you to go and speak to someone regarding his plans for foreign alliances.

“Oh, hello,” You bowed, rather gracefully if you did say so yourself. He bowed in return, smiling brightly. “Are you enjoying the party?”

“Indeed, I am,” He responded. You looked out to the crowd of people eating and drinking wine. Where the fuck was Felix when you needed him, for Christ’s sake? “I do hope to apologise to you, however. I admit we all had our hesitations about you becoming Queen Consort, if the rumours of Chris’ abdication were to be true.”

“Oh. Wow. Yes, I understand.” You were feeling timid, cheeks blushing in embarrassment. You bit on a small block of cheese just to have something to do while he stared you down.

“I wish to apologise for that, Princess. We were very quick to judge. You’ve since shown such elegance, on the outing with the two foreign Princesses. It was lovely to see you enjoying it in such a sophisticated manner,” He praised you. You blushed even harder, grabbing another tiny piece of cheese from the plate held in your hand to chew on. You were going to stink of cheese if you didn’t stop eating out of awkwardness, you thought. “That, and it’s very impressive that you continue to be by the Prince’s side.”

Wow. This guy was actually being so nice. He hadn’t even dropped any bomb questions on you like before, maybe-

“Any plans for heirs soon, may I ask?” There it was. You choked on your piece of cheese, covering your mouth and trying to cough it down. God, please go down, you thought, you can’t fucking risk spitting cheese out on this guy. Weirdly, the guy simply laughed, a bellowing laugh that echoed around the hall but didn’t cause anyone to jolt in surprise. “I do love asking questions like that, I am sorry. I’ll leave you to continue with your night.”

You managed to swallow the piece of cheese. You waved at him a bit too late, as he’d already started to walk away laughing, but you still shouted out after him. “Lovely to speak to you!” Oh, God. Could you get any more fucking awkward?

You both arrived back to your room late, the sun already down and the moonlight glowing through the curtains. Felix immediately stripped off to his boxers, grumbling about the suit being tight and too ‘constrictive’. You giggled, kicking your heels off and joining him on the bed when he sprawled out on it, arms splayed wide.

You laid your head on his chest, still in your dress that you’d shucked up to your hips with your movement onto the comfortable bed. You just couldn’t be bothered to get changed yet, worn out from the big day. He’d pulled the canopy down on the four posters around the bed before you’d left, and the sheer fabric obscured you slightly from the rest of the room. “Did so well today, Pixie.”

“Mm, yeah?” His chest vibrated with the deep timbre of his voice, his arm curling around you to hold you tighter. “I’m glad. I really tried to do well, sugarplum. They like you now.”

You scoffed out a laugh. “Only because you told them to, baby.”

“Hey, absolutely not. Peachgate worked a charm,” Felix mused. You’d had so much fun devouring all of the peaches afterwards, and your kisses had tasted of the sweet juice for hours later. 

You blushed at the thought of your kisses with each other, normally wet and filthy. Oh, yeah. You almost forgot you’d been planning on showing him just how well he’d done.

“Lixie?”

“Yeah, sugarplum?”

“You really did so well today,” You shifted, still laying on your side but starting to kiss his neck. His head rolled to the side to give you better access, him immediately understanding what you intended to do. “Wanna show you, yeah? I wanna show you how good you are, Pixie.”

Felix groaned when you bit slightly into his collarbone, fingers winding to push your hair out of your face so he could see you. “You gonna let me have that sweet pussy?”

“Hmm, maybe later,” You mused, fingers moving to brush against the waistband of his underwear. His jaw went slack instantly at the contact. “Gonna suck this cock first. Want to worship you, is that okay?”

Felix nodded, his breath coming out heavy now. “Of course, sugarplum. You’re gonna let me cream that pretty mouth, yeah?”

Oh. You stifled a moan, nodding frantically in response. Then, you said something that would mortify you in any other situation, but you had a feeling it would break Felix’s brain. “Absolutely, my King.”

Felix’s eyes widened. With a swift movement, he was grabbing your waist, kissing you chastely as if he was apologising for what he was about to do. He pushed you down between his legs by his shoulder, your face positioned just slightly above his boxers. His cock was already starting to fatten with arousal, thickness pressing against the fabric and rendering it sheer like the canopy surrounding you. 

“You better get my cock in that mouth now or so help me God.”

You blinked up at him in surprise. It took a moment before you realised what you had intended to do, and your fingers were dragging down his boxers, revealing the cock you were so well-acquainted with. This time, your eyes focused on the full, heavy balls underneath his shaft too. You wanted them in your mouth.

Leaning forward, you ran your tongue over his leaking cockhead before curling your fingers around the base of his length. Felix let out a shuddering breath, encouraging you to continue. With a swift movement, you sunk your head down to engulf the amount of his length that you could manage without choking, using your hand to pump the rest.

“O-Oh, yeah. That’s good,” Felix hummed, spreading his legs wider for you to have greater access to him. You continued to bob your head, tongue swirling around the underside of his shaft up to his cockhead. You swallowed down any precum that accumulated in the slit. Ensuring the blowjob got wet and messy with spit, you pulled off to pump his shaft, slick with the remnants of your mouth. In a brief moment of confidence, you lowered your head and then you were sucking his balls into your mouth.

He jolted sharply, almost kicking you. He let out a high, broken moan, letting you swirl your tongue around his balls and suck sharply. “Ah- ah, that’s filthy, fuck- yeah, yeah, sugarplum, shit, that’s it. Dirty girl.”

You moaned against his skin, letting his balls slide out of your mouth with a pop and returning to suckle on his cockhead. He let one hand go down to your head, pushing your hair back off of your face so he could see you, and you gazed up at him with wide eyes. 

“D-Don’t stop looking at me like that, sugarplum,” Felix slurred out, grabbing you softly by the hair to pull you off of his cock. “Fuck, can I…? Hhnnng- can you- can you open your mouth, stick your tongue out, please? Fuck, always thought about this, shit.”

You felt yourself burst with happiness at those words - that he’d always imagined this, before you followed his instructions. You opened your mouth and let your tongue loll out obediently. Before you could process why he’d asked you to do this for him, he was gripping his length and slapping the cockhead against your tongue. You could feel humiliation pooling inside of you, but it was overwhelmed by intense arousal.

Felix started to jerk his cock in front of your face, his small hand making it look so thick. He was frantic, jerking at his shaft intensely while he looked at you, grunting every so often when his cockhead managed to hit your tongue again. It was so filthy.

“That- oh, oh, yeah, that’s it- fuck- gonna, gonna-“ He let out another high, broken sound as ropes of white cum started to cover your tongue. You were quick to wrap your lips back around his tip, suckling and milking his balls of the rest of the cum he had to give you. Eventually, he fell back boneless, his eyes hazy. “Oh my God.”

You giggled, licking your lips clean. Weirdly enough, you felt so content that you’d worshipped his cock so well that you didn’t feel the need for your own orgasm, sidling up to him in bed. “Good?”

“Good?” Felix scoffed, turning to look at you. Once he looked at you he giggled cutely, leaning to nuzzle his nose against yours. He pulled you in closer before he spoke. “Fucking amazing, sugarplum. You blew my fucking mind.”

“You blow mine everyday, Pixie.”

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

You were a Queen Consort. Officially, in full blown fucking writing. Black and white. Plain as day, your name, followed by the title of Queen Consort in swirly, intricate writing. Shit was getting serious. You were the Queen Consort, and the love of your life was the King.

The coronation had gone well. It was a process you’d honestly zoned out a little for, beneath all of the finery and decorations draped around the palace. There’d been a horse and carriage, or something. You weren’t sure. You honestly weren’t as involved as you’d presumed. 

You had stood in front of the kingdom, however - it was being broadcasted on TV also for the people who couldn’t attend - when they’d announced your brand new title. Your mother had bawled. The Queen herself had actually also sobbed. Everyone in the crowd had even cheered, so they really did like you now.

You thought of your journey, from a scarred-knees type of kid in your long white socks who followed Felix around intently to where you were now. Some days, you still felt like a fraud - this had all happened in a few months. You’d gone from believing your love was unrequited, never to be returned to being married to the only man you’d ever love. You even got to fuck him every night, so that was a bonus.

You’d held a bouquet of baby’s breath at the coronation on Felix’s request. Blinking down at it while people cheered, you felt weirdly content. You’d do your best to serve the country, even if you still felt like the same young girl with an unrequited love for her best friend. 

When his dainty hand was placed upon the small of your back and a small kiss was pressed to your forehead, wholly real and unfalse despite the fact that you were in front of so many people, you shook that thought out of your head. You were there, present and a different person to what you’d previously been.

It had taken a while to get here, but one thing you were absolutely sure of: you’d been in love with Lee Felix for as long as you could remember, and he loved you back unconditionally.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

Epilogue

You stared at the offending object in front of you. Was it offending, really? Hadn’t you both wanted this, even beneath the whole dirty talk facade of it all?

The pregnancy test felt like it was taunting you, two blue lines clear as day. What the actual fuck? It made sense, really, you mused, finger tapping your chin comically as you thought. You’d been feeling nauseous, yeah. You’d missed your period, and maybe your tummy was feeling a little bloated and swollen. All the signs of a baby, really. 

Okay, yeah. It made perfect sense. You were fucking pregnant. 

When the door to your room shut, you panicked. You’d been in the ensuite staring at the test for so long that you’d completely forgotten that Felix was due home at any point now. You didn’t know what the fuck to do, and in your brief panic, you wrapped the pregnancy test up in toilet roll and attempted to flush the test down the toilet. Not your brightest moment, you’ll admit.

Especially when the toilet water started rising, and your heart started beating extremely quickly.

A knock on the door made you exclaim in surprise, pressing your back against the bathroom door as if the lock wouldn’t stop him from coming in. You had to have that extra barricade. You looked down at your tummy, hand smoothing over your skin. There was a whole fucking baby in there. Okay, no, it probably wasn’t a baby yet. It was just a bunch of cells chilling in your womb with no care in the world, if a bunch of cells could even think and contemplate life. 

“Sugarplum? Are you in there?” 

Your eyes widened. Oh, no. “U-Um, yeah. Welcome back Lixie. You can’t come in.” 

You heard a giggle from the other side of the door. “Why not? I’ve seen you pee before-“

You blushed, still staring at the toilet. The test floated in the water menacingly. You wanted to punch it, and then yourself. “Um. I’m not peeing, I’m in the shower.”

“Oh. Okay, I can’t hear it, but I’ll just… I’ll go then. See you when you’re done, sugarplum,” Felix was still chirping happily. You grimaced. He needed to know. 

“Wait.” You turned around, taking a deep breath. You could practically feel his presence on the other side of the door, as if you were psychic. He was waiting patiently. You reached up, sliding the lock open and opening the door just a crack. He stared at you, eyes wide and gazing at your appearance. You most definitely weren’t in the shower, and were standing there awkwardly, fully clothed and cheeks red. He thought you looked absolutely radiant. 

You thought he did, too. He’d been horseback riding by the looks of it, probably with Chan as he was visiting. He was still clad in tight trousers, boots taken off but a tight suit jacket still zipped up around his lithe frame. 

“I got somethin’ to show you, so. Come in.”

Felix looked confused. You didn’t blame him. You opened the door wider and yanked him into the lavish ensuite. He stood there with his eyes closed and lips pursed, trembling as if he was very close to laughing at your expense. You pointed at the toilet, trying hard not to be bothered at his amusement.

“Look.”

You knew this would appear insane to anyone else, but Felix’s eyes opened anyway, staring at the toilet. The pregnancy test still floated there, bobbing like an apple in a tub of water on Halloween. 

“I tried to flush it. I dunno why. Panicked.”

“Is that-? Sugarplum…?” He was speechless. Oh God. You nodded anyway, clutching onto his arm as if you were scared he’d run. “That’s a pregnancy test?”

You nodded again. 

He took a deep breath. “And it’s…? It’s in the toilet. Why is it in the toilet, sugarplum?”

“Um. I flushed it, because it’s positive, and I panicked when you got back,” You blushed. You were so fucking stupid sometimes. “I’m pregnant. Didn’t know how to tell you, so… I’m just telling you.”

Felix blinked. “Isn’t it kinda menacing right now? It’s just staring at us.”

You gasped. “That is exactly what I thought, isn’t it so fucking creepy? It’s like a knife or something. Sinister.”

It seemed that in that moment, the reality of the situation hit Felix, and he turned to you, looking at your belly with wide eyes. He looked up at you. Then yet again, he looked at your belly. 

Then, he let out a blood-curdling yell, picking you up and swinging you around the room. You screamed in surprise, clenching onto his shoulders.

“You’re pregnant! Shit! You’re pregnant, oh my God! We’re gonna have a little mini me running around,” Felix was still yelling as he ran with you in his arms back to the room. He looked as if he was going to throw you onto the bed for a cuddle, but instead, he chose to place you down delicately after having a moment to think. He was smiling from ear to ear, moving to his knees to deliver a sweet peck to your tummy. “Little baby in there. Mini me. Or mini you. Little fucking bean.”

“It’s just a bunch of cells right now, Lix,” You giggled when he kept kissing your belly. “It’s not a living thing.”

“No, but it will be my baby. I’m gonna wait on you hand and foot, not gonna be allowed to do anything for nine months. Y’hear me, sugarplum?” You nodded in response. He started muttering in disbelief. “Fuckin’ pregnant. No wonder you’ve been looking so radiant, sugarplum. I’ve been wanting to fuck you senseless every day!” 

You gasped at his words, and again when he was quickly looming over you to give you your own kisses. 

You moaned when he started kissing your neck. “‘M gonna fuck you senseless, sugarplum. I love you so fucking much.”

“I love you more, Pixie, my King.”

END.

˚ʚ♡ɞ˚

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[evilminji]

Hey Minji! A thought for your Star Wars things!

Who ever said the SI-OC was the only one to get dumped in SW? Just. A Creche that has several Reincarnations/Transmigrants.

Oh? My god? Just... the FIRST thing that popped into my head? Was the image of one of those "we are so Unbelievably Overworked We No Longer Fear You Nor Death" Sort of office workers/team of workers(nonspecific)?

Just... fuckin EVERYBODY knows Star Wars. Not everybody focused on the same PART of it, but the DO know it. So OBVIOUSLY? The Force decided it should bring in an A Team.

It Did Not ASK the A Team.

They are... like? 4. And sitting in a soft foam, brightly colored Creche, in their lil Jedi rompers, all sitting in a circle, looking at each other like... ( -_-) (-_- ) you too, huh?

Yeeeeeep. (God does Jerry want a cigarette. Jerry gave them up in his 20s. But he's KINDA GOING THROUGH IT, okay?!) (Sarah is hyperventilating in the corner. Her KIDS! Oh GOD. Her KIDS! She was on the way to pick them up from SOCCOR PRACTICE!!!)

Just? This whole ass team of "yeah, we know the LORE, but buddy, pal, we had LIVES! What the FUCK. Star Wars was a HOBBY!" Type adults? No one is happy and everyone wants to choke the metaphysical concept of The Force with their itty, bitty lil baby hands.

They may RIOT.

And like? Do to sheer NUMBERS? They make up ALMOST a full Creche?

Almost.

There is like... one? Maybe two? Actual Jedi Babies™ in their group? It's A Team... plus our collective children. Whom we parent. The MOST baby of babies. Also the spokesperson when they want to fool anyone into thinking they're "normal".

I want Jerry to have a fake cigarette. He's looked up death sticks and like FUCK is he putting that shit in his body, but dear LORD are the oral fixation and mental effects of a past addiction still both real, and a pain in the ASS.

If you try and TAKE his fake ass, hand made, bespoke not-a-cigarette from his itty bitty lil baby hands? He will take your KNEES. These FUCKERS won't even let him have COFFEE. Let him HAVE THIS. *hisses from the walls*

I want them to be ☆~Nightmare Children~☆

They have the power of The Force, various past life skills, an uninterrupted access to the galaxy's BIGGEST LIBRARY, close proximity to FAR too many senator AND their living spaces, and? An actual negative number of fucks to give. They can take shifts. Tag team. Be creepy, horrible, terrible, God awful nightmare creatures climbing out from your WALLS.

Somehow they keep escaping.

Down through the lower temple as they examine the hidden tunnels and escape routes. Through the vents. Forcing other jedi to become VERY familiar with where those pathways are. Sure hope THAT won't someday save your lives! Ya ungrateful, "you're grounded, stop sneaking out younglings" BASTARDS! So rude!!

The camp out in the Corrie Gaurd office. Bring the babies.

Here, you seem stressed, random gaurd. Hold a Jedi Baby. They radiate sunshine and good vibes. Are literally the Anti-Old-Man-Sith. We brought caffeine and food from the temple. Are willing to follow you around like "adorable ducklings" on patrol under the excuse that we're "training" for when we get our own soilders.

Sure is INCONVENIENT for all these asshole senators to has a witness, huh?

You gaurd my back, I'll gaurd yours. And if a certain long neck trips near the stairs? You didn't see SHIT. I'm BABY. How could I POSSIBLY have the control to do that? Now excuse me... we need to practice our "we Jedi Children can stare into your SOOOOOULS, we See All Your Sins." Wide Eyed Unblinking Predator Stare.

(O.O) (O.O) (O.O)

[sublimati0ns]

What's your current stance on Starscream's trine (considering you have chosen to keep this fanon due to its value in potentially justifying Starscream's lack of paint as another point of his misery) in terms of how they (and their... tragic absence) affected the current Starscream we see in the Prime continuity? In Aligned Universe canon he is kind of responsible for the rather brutal deaths of both (as it is normal in most TF continuities) so probably very few warm feelings intended but like. I rather liked the Crawling Back to You's large revelation and how it crashed on Starscream and how it almost spelled out the undercurrent "It was your own fault you were left alone in this pit" he seemed to conclude under the layers of hurt and anger (and there were ways this sentiment was not incorrent...).

To preface, I have not consumed any of the other Aligned works beyond TFP, so I can’t give an informed opinion about anything present in the comics, games, or novels! I only know the Prime team was given the freedom to contradict previously-established lore if they felt it would serve TFP’s story better, which has resulted in conflicting information between works in the Aligned family, so I’ve been treating Prime as a standalone this whole time 🙇

Once I get through more of the Aligned family I’ll probably have more robust things to say about how they connect to each other, but for now I can’t comment ahaha.

Anyway, yeah, I enjoyed Transformatron’s take on Starscream’s story in Crawling Back To You! When I made my previous post on my thoughts about what Knock Out and Starscream’s backstories might be, I had adopted their headcanons as well—but now that I’ve read more of the IDW 05 comics, watched more TFA / G1, and caught up with Skybound, I’m not sure 🤔 I haven’t seen much of Thundercracker or Skywarp at all, let alone what rapport they might have with Starscream…

I do enjoy them both in the Skybound run—Skywarp being a trigger-happy goon (as in henchman, not—you know) and Thundercracker having morals that conflict with the comically deranged nature of other Decepticons—but I feel like DWJ’s writing is a bit too shallow for me to sink my teeth into? Which isn’t necessarily a bad thing—a story doesn’t have to be deep to entertain, and I definitely find the Skybound comic entertaining! But neither of them have much going on, so I can’t turn them around in my head or extrapolate how those iterations might behave in other scenarios or settings without taking ample liberty.

And since I’m the type that likes to play as close to the source as possible (to the best of my ability; we all have different interpretations, and I know mine can run niche), I don’t like stretching things too much… But I’m going to be digging into more of the canon whenever I can, cuz the trine is so popular in the fandom and I want to know why! TC and SW have screentime in G1 and IDW 05, so I hope I can see them in action more soon :D

On the note of stripped paint, lately I’ve been rotating two alternatives to trine grief, though:

Playing with the canon lore for aggressive depigmentation, which could have manifested in Starscream as the result of his many near-death and / or psychologically-traumatising experiences, or

Starscream stripping his paint after he thinks Windblade dies rather than Thundercracker and Skywarp, cuz I love their interaction in the IDW 05 run///

The latter moves more into “making sh*t up” territory, though, ahaha. I just think it could be neat to take a similar angle to Transformatron with the trine—Starscream and Windblade were close, but as the war warped him, she made the decision to leave for both of their sakes.

[thehypnone]

Symbol on the Surface Chapter 21

WC: 950

Relationship: SwissAlps & the kits

Tags: Transmasc Swiss, Body Image Issues/Insecurity, Reassurance, Fluff

After they get all full of milk and content they get sleepy again, so Mountain puts them back into their crib. He watches them for a moment and Swiss soon joins him, gluing himself to the earth ghoul’s back and hooking his chin over his shoulder.

Chapter 1 here or on AO3.

Read chapter 21 under the cut or on AO3.

For two weeks since giving birth Swiss hadn’t had a chance to look at himself in the mirror. First, he wasn’t strong enough to be up most of the time, and when he did have mostly healed, the kits kept him busy.

Now when he’s finally seeing his body, he is…disappointed.

It’s not that Swiss thought his stomach would go back to normal right away, he just never thought about how it would look after giving birth. It simply didn’t cross his mind.

From what he has looked up online, and from what Omega has told him, the way he currently looks is completely normal, and would get better with time—even faster than it would for a human—but it will never look the same way it did before he got pregnant.

Swiss doesn’t really know if he’s okay with that, but he tries to convince himself he’s still as attractive as he was, and that his stomach is only a symbol of bringing life into this world. Three precious lives.

At least the multi ghoul knows that Mountain won’t see him as less for it; it helps. And Mountain himself doesn’t spare reassurance, either.

The earth ghoul wishes Swiss could literally read his mind. His mate trusts him without that to be speaking truthfully, but if he had an unfiltered look into Mountain’s brain, he could never doubt himself ever again. 

But that is not possible, so Mountain makes due by other means.

The moment silence falls in the room, when the kits get lulled to sleep, Swiss falls into his armchair with a deep sigh. He pulls his legs up to cover himself, but he does it absentmindedly—he doesn’t even realize.

It makes Mountain a little sad; Swiss has always been so open and beaming, and now he’s hiding like this.

The earth ghoul walks up to him and kneels on the carpet before the chair, making his mate raise an eyebrow in question. He can see in Mountain’s eyes, though, that it’s not sex he wants. He places his hands on Swiss’ knees and gently pulls his legs down onto either side of him. Then, Mountain leans forward, wraps his arms around the multi ghoul’s middle and nuzzles his face into his stomach as he starts to purr.

“What are ya doin’, sweetheart?” Swiss rumbles in question, smiling faintly.

“I loved you pregnant, but I’ve missed your tummy being so soft,” Mountain replies with his face shoved all the way into said tummy, making his words barely audible. The multi ghoul giggles at that, but it’s weak and quiet—lacking his usual liveness.

Mountain doesn’t say anything more, nor does he move. He stays there, purring louder than ever as he’s genuinely enjoying the predicament he’s put himself into. At some point Swiss brings his hand to his head, to drag through his hair and scratch at his scalp.

He only pulls back—regretfully—when the kits start to wake again. The earth ghoul gets up to get them, leaving Swiss on the chair to get out of his sweater; the kits need a snack after a nap.

“Hello there, my little loves,” Mountain coos as he reaches into the crib for Aelin, who’s the first one awake. He smiles brightly as he pulls her out and brings her to his chest, holding the tiny sleepy ghoulette close. Swiss feels like he’s about to melt into a puddle as he’s watching the scene.

After a moment, though, Aelin wakes up more and starts getting wiggly and whiny, so Mountain hands her over to Swiss so he can feed her, while the other gets to the other two.

“Hi, baby,” the multi ghoul greets her, but she seems to only be interested in her mama’s boob, not him. He can live with that, he supposes.

In no time at all the other two are fully awake and latching onto Swiss as soon as Aelin’s done—she doesn’t love having either of her siblings feeding on the other side as she’s doing so, the spoiled princess that she already is.

After they’re all full of milk and content they get sleepy again, so Mountain puts them back into their crib. He watches them for a moment and Swiss soon joins him, gluing himself to the earth ghoul’s back and hooking his chin over his shoulder.

The kits are all touching each other in at least one spot and each is wrapped around a plushie—the ones they’ve gotten from Dewdrop. They fell in love with them right away, especially Amon, whose favorite thing to do is suck on his teddy bear’s ear.

Swiss grunts dramatically every time he has to touch the slobbery plushie, but he still finds his kits the most adorable ever. Adorable, but nasty at the same time; he’s so grateful to Mountain for dealing with most of their…mess.

Swiss did not know how poopy kits are.

But that doesn’t change the fact that he loves them so much, it’s practically insane; he feels like a man possessed.

The multi ghoul can’t stop himself from grinning as he watches both of Arya’s tiny hands holding onto her siblings’ tails—each in one hand. She has taken a particular liking to the fluffy tip of Amon’s, because the fins on Aelin’s are a little too spikey to play with.

That doesn’t stop the small ghoulette from trying, though; barely two weeks old and she’s already following Swiss’ steps of being the designated menace.

He can’t wait to run around setting fires with the little ghoulette on his shoulders, cheering.

Taglist: @arkeusruin @skele-bunny @everybodyshusband @ratsummer @jazz-bazz @mac-and-thefox @karmicbias @wine-irytatus @ghoultrifle (if anyone from here wants to be removed lmk, and also if anyone else wants to be added)

[coyfsh]

Whole Again

Chapter one

Late night snack

link to all chapters:

-===============================-

Warnings: implied self harm, swearing, eating disorder

15+

      You woke up to the sound of crashing, slowly sitting up and rubbing the sleep from your eyes. The pink and orange skies of Alola seeping through your tattered curtains. You sighed, slipping out of bed and peering out the window. 

   It was a rare occasion for it not to be raining in Po town, of course it did happen, just not often. The sun was setting in the sky, and a few stars had started to peek through the darkening dome above. You went over to your vanity, blankly gazing at the figure through the mirror. You put your hand on your stomach, almost admiring how empty it was. You felt pretty when you were hollow inside. It made you feel light, of course after a while the emptiness was replaced with the pain of hunger, which was now starting to set in.

   It had been a few months since you officially joined team skull. It certainly was an adjustment. The reason you hadn’t jumped up at the sound of crashing was because it happened so often. The grunts were damn good at breaking things, and it took a while for you to get used to it. Most of the grunts had no where else to go, including you. The shady house was your home, and the same could be said for plenty of other grunts. This was part of why you had your own room.

   You weren’t like the other grunts. You didn’t like breaking things, felt bad for stealing, and overall didn’t really have a punk attitude. Often you were teased for this. Often times they called you ‘Softie’, and other crude things you didn’t like thinking about. You knew they were kidding around, teasing was kinda how they showed affection, but it didn’t always feel like it.

    It was Plumera who first noticed when you weren’t taking the grunts comments lightly. With that, on top of the sleeping arrangements getting more and more cramped, you got your own room. And it so-happened to be 2 doors down from Guzma’s. Plumera viewed you as one of the more well behaved and trustworthy grunts. Although she cared about them all the same, she treated you a bit differently. Less like a little kid and more like your actual age, which was 18. 

    You remember after you were officially an adult, Guzma called you into his room. He gave you a long lecture on how ‘your an adult now, so act like it’. He didn’t care if you were breaking the law or being a menace, he just cared if you got caught. If you did, you were now responsible for whatever came next. He didn’t want the team suffering because of your own sloppiness. He did this lecture to every grunt who turned 18, but it felt like he was singling you out. And it didn’t feel great. 

    You admired Guzma, you always did. He was confident and cocky in a way that you could never be. He didn’t care what other people thought of him, and it showed. You wished you could be more like him, all the grunts did. When Plumera told him that your sleeping arrangement wasn’t with the other grunts, he didn’t seem to mind, which you were relieved. 

    Sometimes he’d pass you in the hallway as you were heading downstairs. “Don’t die.” He’d say, since the only way downstairs was from on top of the roof. It kinda became a little tradition whenever you saw each other in passing, even if you weren’t heading to the roof. It was comforting, and made you feel important, even if it was silly. 

    As you slipped your slides on, you reached down to grab your hoodie, throwing it over your team skull tank top. Wearing the normal female team skull uniform wasn’t the easiest when you were self conscious. You didn’t like having that much of your body on display. It was always so awkward when people asked what your scars were from. So; often you wore sweatpants and a hoodie. Although wearing the team skull uniform wasn’t mandatory, you felt bad if you weren’t matching the group. That’s why you had customized your normal black hoodie awhile ago. 

    It was almost the same style as Guzma’s jacket at first. You had spray painted a white team skull logo on the back, as well as white zigzags on the sleeves. You didn’t think he’d really mind, until he saw you wearing it for the first time…

He kept looking at you..

    That made you feel really self conscious. You decided it would be best not to match his style, even if it made you feel more confident. So you threw it away and customized a new black hoodie, which is what you were wearing now. It had white x’s around the sleeves, like the tank tops did, and a zig zag around the waist. It was a big big for you, but you liked baggy clothes. They made you feel safe. 

     You walked out of your room, grabbing your wallet and phone on your way out. You hopped up onto the roof and headed downstairs, where you avoided most of the grunts. They did like you, but you weren’t really in the mood for talking. You quickly checked the kitchen, which was empty and ransacked, as usual. You probably should’ve come down around dinner, Plumes always had something ready for everyone to eat. 

    Sighing, you walked out the door and headed out of Po town, putting on your headphones to drown out your mind. It took a while of walking to get to the Malasada shop, which made the pain in your stomach only get worse. The sun had set by the time you arrived, meaning the shop would close soon. Luckily, you just made it. You paid for a box of about 6 Malasada’s, before heading back to Po-town. 

     You decided to walk back along the beach. You liked walking around at night, it was peaceful. No one was watching, and it felt like the world was yours. The night air always felt good. The high tide brushed over your ankles as you saw the walls of Po town slowly approaching from the distance. You debated weather you should sit on the beach and finish your snack, since you were practically starving. Someone approached you before you could finish your decision. 

    “Ey’ Grunt, yeah you, watcha doin out here?” 

   You recognized the booming voice almost immediately. It was Guzma. You turned around, box in hand. “Oh, it’s you. Watcha got there?” Guzma approached you, his Golisopod following close behind. You forgot how often he took his Pokémon out for a stretch here. Before you could respond, he immediately recognized the box. “Oh shit! Malasada’s?” He had a grin on his face as he almost ripped open the box. “Ya mind if I steal some?” You opened your mouth to speak, but he was already popping one into his mouth. “This is the good shit.” He said, the Malasada muffling his words. 

“Ya weren’t plannin’ on eatin’ these all yourself, where ya?” He said in a joking tone.

     You felt your heart sink. You wanted to disappear right there and then. Now he thought you were a fatass. And you felt like you were. “Who just downs a box of Malasadas?” You scolded yourself as you shoved the box into him. His eyes widened a bit and he almost dropped them. “Y-you can have em’, I’m not hungry anymore.” He didn’t even have time to react before you were already hurrying back to the Shady house. 

   You held back tears as you hustled to your room. You slipped inside and shut the door behind you. “God… what the hell is wrong with me?” You mumbled to yourself as you face planted onto your bed. You pushed back all your negative thoughts and stomach pains as you started to drift off to sleep, when you jolted back awake when you heard a knock at your door. 

   You opened your door halfway, hoping no one was there despite knowing there was. As your eyes adjusted to the dim light of the hallway, you saw who was standing there. It was Guzma. 

“You uh, left this behind.” He held up the box of Malasada’s from awhile ago. By now it was dented and creased. “Felt kinda bad takin’ em all for myself, since ya bought em’ and all.” He lifted the box for you to take. “I’m not hungry.” You said blankly, hoping he’d leave. He raised an eyebrow. “Look, I ain’t stupid. I know you didn’t come down to eat earlier today, and I ain’t gonna be responsible for your dead ass. Now take it.” He pushed the box into you and let go, forcing your reflexes to catch it. “Kept em warm for ya’, so you better eat em before they get cold and gross. You’re welcome.” He said in a rough voice, but you could tell he was being genuine. He walked off to his room, stopping at the sound of your voice. 

“Thanks.” 

[thefandomenchantress]

So. The Ace culprit theory.

I’m sure my stance on this is not surprising. Am I aware there is some evidence for it? Yes. Will I also ignore said evidence due to extreme bias? Also yes.

No but seriously. Does the Ace culprit theory hold water? While I’ll bring some of the most damning pieces of evidence up in this post, I also want to analyze if the Ace culprit theory works thematically. Or at least that’s the goal.

Okay? Okay. Let’s get started.

First things first, this motherfucker:

The Tape

As anyone who’s seen an Ace or Eden culprit theory is most likely aware of, the tape disappears from the background in this scene.

Not only that, but it can’t be a mistake. Later, Rose and Teruko can’t find the tape, even though no one has been to the gym that morning besides them. That means one of these three must’ve taken it.

Which means our only potential culprits are Eden, Ace, and Teruko…Or I guess one of them could be an accomplice who helped the real culprit. Either way, who is most likely involved in the murder?

Well, we can take Teruko off the list. Not only would it make almost no sense to kill her off right now, but she was standing the whole time and never bent down to grab the tape. If she did, it would’ve been extremely obvious to the other two and they would have said something about it.

Eden makes a lot more sense. She was shoved to the ground as it disappears, so while she was on the ground she could’ve grabbed it without anyone noticing, especially since Teruko is distracted by Ace and Ace is distracted by Nico almost murdering him. She was also already on the second floor and possibly planning her murder/setting some of her plans into action before this happened.

But Eden’s not the focus of this post. What about Ace? Can we justify why he would’ve taken the tape?

In my opinion…Not really?

See, if Ace took the tape, it would hinge on the idea that, while bleeding out and mostly unconscious, he decided he would need to commit a murder. After all, he was almost just killed and if he doesn’t act fast someone could try to murder him again. This isn’t a bad idea, per se. But I just can’t believe it.

After all, as Eden and Teruko walked in, we know Ace must be unconscious, (if we assume Nico is actually trying to kill him, which I do), since Nico is approaching him and presumably getting ready to make the final blow with the wire they’re carrying. If Ace was conscious, he wouldn’t be just sitting there accepting his fate. So that means that in the minute or so of Nico leaving and Teruko investigating, Ace would’ve had to have woken up and made enough of a coherent murder plan to know he would need the tape.

While Ace isn’t as braindead as the DRDT cast assume, this still seems like a bit of a reach for a character who lends to not think things through, especially when he’s bleeding heavily and emotions are running high. But hey, characterization is pretty subjective, so I won’t go too deep into this. Who knows, maybe Ace is a murder-plan-making genius.

But if Ace was planning a murder in order to escape the school and not get killed like he almost just was, then he would have known he needed to pass a class trial. Meaning he shouldn’t be publicly declaring he’s going to murder Nico, since if people know he was the one who murdered them, he would be executed. So if this theory were true, Ace would’ve had to have been lying about wanting to kill Nico and going off to do just that.

But if Ace was just pretending to want to kill Nico un-secretly, then why? He would need to act angry at Nico in order to not be suspicious, since that’s what he would normally do, but he doesn’t need to pretend to try and murder them to sell his act. If he took the tape and the other two saw, it would make sense for him to use “I’m going to kill Nico with it” as an excuse. But if he did steal the tape, he did it secretly, eliminating that option.

Okay, but what if we go with the theory that his plan at the time was to kill Nico with it, then plans switched and he decided to use it to kill someone else? Well, that would still leave the question of why he sneakily stole the tape. He already announced he was killing Nico, hiding the ‘weapon’ he planned to use wouldn’t do anything. Also, tape isn’t exactly a top-tier murder weapon.

All this is to say that I just can’t see why Ace would’ve acted the way he did if he was planning a murder already. Stealing the tape as he was bleeding out is the only way Ace could’ve gotten his hands on the tape, and therefore the only way he could’ve set up the murder contraption. And if that’s the case, I just don’t think it makes enough sense to me for me to believe it.

Next piece of evidence:

Arei’s crime scene

This murder method appears to be…Weirdly complicated? Especially for a chapter two case. The culprit would need a good reason to complicate their plans like this. After all, the more preparation and supplies need for your method, the more evidence that’s left behind.

The Ace Culprit theory offers a good explanation for all this. The more complicated (or clever) the murder method, the less likely it is that people are going to assume the class idiot is the culprit.

I do think this is something I…Can’t really refute? Presuming Ace somehow got his hands on the tape, maybe he had enough time to think of this plan. I can’t know for sure he didn’t.

So let’s move on to something else.

The theme(s) of Chapter Two

The most obvious title/theme of the chapter is ‘All That Glitters’, coming from the saying, ‘Not all that glitters is gold’.

At first, I thought of this as a simple, ‘people aren’t what they seem’ theme. In that case, Ace fits, because the character who’s seen as dumb and cowardly killing someone is such a clever way would be unexpected.

But I don’t think that’s quite what the saying the title is referencing means. It’s more along the lines of something not being as good as it seems. Gold is valuable, but not everything that looks like it is.

And in that case…Yeah, it doesn’t quite work for Ace anymore, since no one saw Ace as good or valuable to begin with, or at least a good majority of the cast doesn’t.

Eden, Levi, or Hu, the top murderer choices from what I’ve seen, all make more sense. The person people thought was good, and who cared about/wanted to protect everyone there, was plotting to kill one of them. Their friendly demeanor, (or in Levi’s case attempts to be friendly), misled people into thinking they were good when they weren’t…Or at least they weren’t once they were pushed to the brink.

There’s also the secret title/theme, A Good Person. This one also doesn’t quite extend to Ace, besides the fact that he and Levi are pretty interconnected. But his and Levi’s connection alone doesn’t quite prove anything. Levi never speaks to Ace about being a good person, at least from what we’ve seen, and something like that doesn’t seem to be on Ace’s mind.

Levi and Eden, however, are both major players in the notion of a good person, because of their talk at the beginning of the chapter. You could make it work for Hu, too, but I’d say she’s more looking to be a useful or reliable person than a good one. But close enough.

All in all, I don’t think culprit-Ace makes much sense, logic-wise or thematically. Especially since, at least to me, it doesn’t feel like his story is supposed to end here. That’s just how I feel, though.

If you want to bring up any other pieces of evidence, or why you think Ace is the culprit, I’d love to hear it! Since Ace is my favorite, there’s always a chance I accidentally overlooked a key piece of evidence while trying to prove his innocence.

[papsiguesss]

Ummmmm first Dooku/Tarkin fanfic draft I guess???

So I've been having very normal thoughts about these two and while I hope to write a multichapter for them in the future, for now I've written down one scene during their early days that I wanted to share here.

Word count: 4443 words

Content warnings: depiction of a panic attack, torture

(Mind you: this is the first time I've written either of these characters, I'm sorry if this seems out of character I'm just trying my best. Also this is very much against canon and I have no fucking idea how the SW universe works apart from these two. This is just me having dumb fun with a crackship that I've gotten way too fond of lmfao)

Context: during the clone wars, Tarkin was incarcerated and tortured for information at a prison called the Citadel, in the story I have for them in my head Dooku (who is on the opposing faction to Tarkin's) has heard news of that his old acquaintance is being tortured and for a reason he cannot quite put down yet, he feels the need to get him out of there. This scene takes place after Dooku has gotten Tarkin out of the Citadel, but on their escape they are being fired at by a shooting squad.

***

He thought that he had found shelter from all the blasters firing at them, but his hairs stood on end all of a sudden as a ray of pure energy shot just past his ear. Had he stood just a little to the left, he would have been shot in the head. Dooku’s eyes widened in a panic. “Stand back, captain!”, he yelled, pushing Tarkin inside of their ship in order to bring him to safety. The younger man scowled. He did not need some Separatist to protect him… what was this man thinking? He was fully capable of protecting himself-

That was what he thought at least, until he saw the count turn around, raise his arm up at the man who had fired at Tarkin and release crackling bolts of lightning from his fingertips, the electricity shooting towards his target and quickly frying the man in a few seconds.

Everything seemed to freeze around Tarkin as he saw it.

…It was his first time being exposed to electricity like that again after the Citadel.

Time slowed down around him as he fell onto his knees, his eyes widened in terror and his chest heaving down more and more quickly up until the point where he was straight up hyperventilating. Everything around him went blurry. He was aware of the blasters shooting around him, but their firing sounded like nothing more than far away, muffled noises. It was as if he suddenly found himself submerged in water.

…That was an apt metaphor, he supposed, because he felt like he was beginning to drown, as well.

It all suddenly flashed back to him. His dark, crammed cell, making him feel claustrophobic. The constant screaming of his fellow captives being subjected to the most horrific forms of torture. But most of all… the pain. The everlasting pain that he still felt after they had run bolt after bolt of electricity through his body, hoping to get information. Information that he would never give them. And with that, torture that would never stop.

Wrapping his arms around his torso, he slumped down to the ground, trembling as he could still feel the scars that he had received while being incarcerated scorch his skin, almost as if he had just been released from the torture chamber. The… the pain… he felt as if he was experiencing it all over again.

Barely feeling in control of his own body, he covered his face with his hands, letting out an agonising, bloodcurdling scream. He rolled himself up in a ball, his eyes widened in shock as he heard his own voice. Why…? Why was he allowing himself to be this distraught by seeing a simple jolt of electricity…? He was aware of the existence of Force Lightning. It was not strange to imagine that Count Dooku would be proficient with using it, he supposed. He should have expected it. Hell, it had been his subordinates that had carried out his torture! So why did this all upset him so much…?

He had to stop himself from pondering this all over though, as he came to a rather… alarming realisation. He… he was doing something that he had not done for… decennia, at this point.

…He was crying.

Tarkin froze in place, immediately falling silent as soon as he noticed his disgusting showing of weakness. How… how was he allowing himself to sink to these levels of patheticness? Had his test at the Carrion Plateau all been for nothing? All his military training… his entire upbringing… Had he learned nothing? How could he possibly think these levels of incompetence were… acceptable…? How was he still supposed to call himself a proud member of the Tarkin family after all this?

What was wrong with him?!

***

Dooku turned around again, closing their shuttle’s entrance so that they would be shielded from the artillery. He let out a sigh of relief. That had been a close one, but nothing a bolt of lightning couldn’t clear. The thought of Tarkin being shot while he was under his care, it… it was just too horrible to think about. Not now that he was finally warming up to him a bit. Not now that he had the slightest chance of being on friendly terms with his old acquaintance again.

No… he would see to it that he was safe. Hostages were to be treated with care, right? He could simply play it off as that, he supposed… but he knew that it was not like that. He still didn’t know why he had been so furious when he had been notified of what his staff at the Citadel had done with the governor as soon as they had gotten their hands on him, but as soon as he had heard it, a raging fire seemed to have ignited within him that would not cease until the captain was out of that prison. He could get his information about the Nexus Route through friendlier ways, he thought to himself. Besides, he knew that Tarkin would not give up any information under the threat of torture. He was far too stubborn for that.

…What his plan would be now that his allies were aware of the fact that he had taken a Republican soldier out of prison for no apparent reason, he did not know though. But he supposed that their first challenge would be to get out of here alive. But his companion could help him with that, he thought.

“Well, governor… I must admit that that was rather too close for my liking”, he sighed, turning around to face Tarkin. “But we are out of danger for n-”

He was cut off though, as he heard the younger man scream his lungs out. The governor was trembling on the floor, lying in foetal position as he slowly began to sob. The count was… puzzled, to say the least. “…Governor?”, he asked, taking a few steps towards Tarkin as he gave no response whatsoever. Dooku doubted whether he even heard him or not. “…Can you hear me…?”

The younger man squeezed his eyes shut, breathing heavily. “…N-no…”, he gasped. “No… I won’t… I never will...” The count frowned. He… clearly wasn’t talking to him. Was this Wilhuff Tarkin? The man who had been Eriadu’s governor? He seemed more like a scared child than anything, in all honesty…

“…Captain, the fire has ceased”, he said rather brusquely. “…You’d think you would not be so distraught by blasters firing after the battles you have found yourself in…” Again, no response. The man just kept on whimpering. After observing the scene in silence for a while, some semblance of concern spread across Dooku’s face. This… did not just seem like theatrics to him. He was well aware of Tarkin having a taste for the dramatic every now and then, but… this seemed serious.

Why was he so panicked, though…? It could not have been the blasters… he must have been in countless fights with them by now… not to mention the fact that the count had seen him use one without issue… so it had to be something else. But what?

Dooku crouched down, a frown on his face as he hesitated on his course of action. He could ask Tarkin what was going on, but… he seemed unable to hear him… so what now? Eventually, he decided. If the governor was not going to tell him… then he was going to have to see for himself. He knew that it was risky… but he had to know. He reached out with his hand, letting it hover a few inches away from the younger man’s forehead as he closed his eyes and focused intently.

…If words would not do the trick, then he would have to reach out with his mind.

***

“N… no…”

Tarkin was strapped down to a table, breathing heavily as his eyes lost focus. His body was covered in burns, and he feebly struggled against his restraints, before screaming loudly as they ran electricity through him yet again. He clenched his jaw, not letting out a single other noise as he seemed to be going absolutely mad from the pain. There was not a single tear to be seen, though. Nor did he let out any sob. He could not afford to show weakness. Not even now.

His torturers were blurry, not even coming into focus. “Tell us about the Nexus route”, one of them barked at the governor, before electrocuting him again. “You know that you are only prolonging your suffering, governor. This is your own doing. We would have been done with you much sooner, had you just given us the information we want…”

Tarkin spat in their face. “I’d rather die than betray the Republic!”, he snarled, gasping loudly as he was subjected to yet another round of electricity. “You’re… you’re wasting your time…”

His interrogator was about to pull the switch again, but they were tapped on the shoulder by another one of the blurry figures. “…You’ll kill him if you subject him to more”, they hissed. “He’s of no use to us when he’s been fried to a crisp. Leave it for now… Return tomorrow.” The other figure seemed reluctant at first, but they eventually acquiesced. “…You are in luck, governor”, they sneered, as they stepped away. “…Enjoy your few hours of peace.” And with those words, the group of blurry figures stepped away into the darkness.

As Tarkin was left alone in his cell, still strapped down, he shivered, his entire body trembling as his eyes rolled back into his skull. He… he did not know how much longer he could take this all. He would never even think of confessing the coordinates of the Nexus route… but he feared that his body would give up on him any day now. He… he would not be surprised if he’d never make it out of this place alive. This… this prison was to be his place of demise… He would waste away here, in pain… Strapped of all of his dignity…

…But that would still be better than betraying what he stood for…

***

Dooku pulled his hand away, his arm trembling as his eyes widened in terror. He… he knew that Tarkin had been tortured under his command… but to experience it firsthand like that… It was nothing short of horrible. Of course. He had been so foolish…

Force Lightning.

Torture by electrocution.

…Tarkin was having a panic attack… one that he had caused.

***

“…Governor?” Some distant voice seemed to be calling out to Tarkin as he slowly opened his eyes again, staring at the ground with a distraught look on his face as he wrapped around his body.

“…Governor Tarkin?”

The captain’s head jolted upwards as he heard his own name, his panicked eyes being met by calm, deeply brown ones.

…Out of all people, why did the count have to be the one to see him like this?!

He and Dooku stared at each other in silence for a while, Tarkin glaring intensely. “…Are you quite all right, governor?”, the count asked. The captain could not believe what he was hearing. What was Dooku getting at? Why was he being this friendly with him all of a sudden? How could he be certain that he did not have any nefarious plans with him, seeing that he was a soldier on the enemy’s side? Just… none of it felt right.

His entire body tensed up as he saw the count reaching out to him with his hand. Was… was he intending to use his Force Lightning on him too now? He quickly crawled backwards, gritting his teeth as he scowled at the man. “Do not touch me”, he snarled, his limbs trembling. “What… what do you really want from me? D… do you want to get me at my weakest, so I’ll give you the information you so desperately want? Is that it?!”

Dooku lowered his arm, frowning. “…Governor, I only want to help you.” Tarkin scoffed. “…Help me? I don’t need help… and especially not from you”, he sneered. “What, did you think that you were helping me when you gave the order to torture me? Was I being helped when they continually ran electricity through my body while locking me up in a tiny cell? Was I being helped when I was on the verge of death, Count? WAS I?!”

He paused, looking away.

…Why was he showing his true feelings to this man so much…?

“…You are the enemy”, he eventually continued, narrowing his eyes. “…Under no circumstances should you ever want to ‘help’ me. Why don’t you just… get it over with already and have your way with me? It would spare us both a lot of time. If your wish is to kill me, then do it. I am not afraid to die for the Republic.”

The count let out a sigh, melancholically staring down as he saw just how distrustful Tarkin was of him. The worst thing was… he could not even blame him for it. He realised now that after all the things that had been done to him while at the Citadel, it was not going to be easy to convince the governor that he had no ill intentions. He was not even actively tapping into the man’s thoughts and he could already sense the sheer anguish coming from him.

…The worst part about this all was that had he paid more attention, he could have prevented all of this.

“…Do you still remember the times before the war, Tarkin?”, he eventually asked. The captain looked up at him. He… was only using his name now, instead of putting one of his titles before it. It stuck out to him. He narrowed his eyes, but kept looking at Dooku, willing to hear him out at least.

“…Do you remember when we could talk to each other as equals, instead of enemies? When we were not divided by this constant fighting of alliances yet?”, the count continued. Tarkin scowled, rolling his eyes. “Remind me again, who is it that stands at the head of one of these alliances?”, he replied. “Oh, that’s right… you are. Bit too late to start regretting a war that was started partially thanks to you, now is it?”

Dooku looked down at the ground, his shoulders slumping down. “…You are right”, he eventually admitted, sighing. “…I am in a hell of my own making. This war… it tires me… And yet, I know that it is too late for me to turn back.”

He paused, looking back up at the governor. “…No matter who will win in the end, I fear that none of this is going to end well for me. I am too far gone, Tarkin. And I am at peace with that. But… that doesn’t mean that I will let people that I respect get subjected to unnecessary cruelty under my watch. Which… which is why I decided to get you out… despite what the other Separatists may think.”

The governor stayed silent for a while, narrowing his eyes. The fact that the count only cared about him being subjected to torture, while not batting an eye at all the other hundreds of prisoners that were being kept there, was… concerning, to say the least… But at the same time, Tarkin noticed that it did not bother him. If this meant that he would be out of harm’s way, then he was not going to complain.

Besides… the weak did not warrant any mercy. It was one of the biggest lessons that had been drilled into his head ever since he was a child. If the others were not worthy of being saved… then they must deserve what they got. Though… in all honesty, the governor was starting to see himself as one of the weak ones more and more. He was only lucky to receive this amount of leniency.

…But that was exactly why he did not trust any of this. He was not deserving of this kindness. He had never received kindness without anything in return. So why should this be any different? It… it was just too suspicious. And he liked none of it.

He looked down again. He was still hyperventilating. His entire body was trembling. Why couldn’t he just… pull himself together already? Why was he showing Dooku all this weakness all of a sudden? He… he was not like this usually… Normally, he could just stay calm and collected… He had stayed calm after the torture up until now… so why was he freaking out about it now all of a sudden?

“…I mean you no harm, governor.” His head shot up apprehensively as he heard the count’s voice again. “…I swear. Helping you calm down is the least I can do, after failing to stop your torture from being carried out… So please, let me.”

Tarkin tensed up, scowling in offence at Dooku’s statement. “I- I don’t need help calming down-”, he huffed, but he fell silent as soon as he felt the count’s hand gently resting on his shoulder. “…Yes, you do”, Dooku corrected him. “It’s only natural, really, after what happened… I’m sorry that I did not take into account that seeing Force Lightning could potentially be traumatic to you, considering… well, the nature of torture they use at the Citadel… I do apologise for bringing those memories back up. I was only trying to get us out of harm’s way.”

The governor narrowed his eyes. “…How did you know that I-”, he stammered, eyeing the count’s hand with suspicion, but not moving away. “…You forget that I am force sensitive”, Dooku interrupted, explaining this all as if it was the simplest matter in the world. “Even now, it is not difficult for me to sense your panic.”

Tarkin scowled. “Oh yes, your order is all very in tune with emotions and that kind of nonsense, isn’t it?”, he taunted. The count fell silent. The governor still associating him with the Jedi hurt him. But he guessed that with Tarkin’s snarkiness, it was to be expected. At least they could both agree on their mutual dislike for the order, he supposed. “…And you are so completely disconnected from them that you cannot even understand yourself anymore”, he snapped back. “Now, will you let me help you or not?”

The governor stayed silent for a while as he heard that. “You cannot even understand yourself anymore…” He did not want to think too deeply about that statement. What could some Separatist know about him, anyway? He was just trying to get under his skin… Not that he needed any more agitation, with this panic attack of his still not subsiding. His trembling would not stop. If anything, it was getting worse. Dooku’s last sentence… was not really helping. “…Fine”, he eventually scowled. “But only because it’ll make you shut up about this all, you got it?”

The count smiled slightly, rolling his eyes. “Of course, governor. Well… why don’t you start by trying to focus on your breathing? Just breathe in… and out… calmly. It helps a lot.”

Tarkin narrowed his eyes, trying to do what was asked of him, if only to get this all over with. A chill ran down his spine though, as he realised that he found himself completely unable to calm his breathing down. He let his hand rest on his chest, his eyes nervously darting from place to place as he could not get himself under control. What… what was happening to him? Why couldn’t he just… relax? None of this was making it any better. He… he simply couldn’t slow down his breathing. “I… can’t…”, he stammered, a puzzled tone coming from his voice. “…I- I don’t know what I’m doing wrong…”

Panic took him, his eyes widening in fear as he looked up at the Count. “W-why is nothing helping?”, he gasped, feeling his chest heaving up and down more and more quickly. He looked down in terror, his heart beating more and more heavily with every passing second. He just completely froze up. He wanted to stand up, to run away, to fight off whatever was causing his fear, but… he was nailed to the ground.  

…He had not felt like this for ages.

“…What’s happening…?”, he whimpered softly.

Dooku reached out to him. “This is not helping…”, he said, inching closer to the governor. “Here, why don’t you sit down comfortably for a moment-”

Instead, Tarkin tensed up even more as he saw the count approaching. “G-get away from me…”, he hissed. “I… I don’t need you fussing over me too… Can’t you see that I’m dealing with enough already…?” The count stopped immediately. “…I’m sorry, governor”, he said. “I only want to help.” The captain scowled. “Well, you’re doing the exact opposite”, he snarled. “I… I don’t need a…”

He fell silent.

“a…”

Everything around him was starting to go blurry as he felt his own heartbeat thrumming in his ears like thunder.

“Governor?”, he heard Dooku ask from far away, his eyes faintly managing to focus on him. All of the colour on Tarkin’s face drained away from him.

“…I feel… odd…”, he stammered feebly, losing focus on where the count was.

Then he fell to the ground, and everything went black.

***

The first thing Tarkin noticed again after regaining consciousness was the soft humming of their spaceship’s motor. From what he could tell, they seemed to be landing. Had they made it out safely, then?

He quickly stopped pondering over that question though, as he noticed another thing.

And that was the fact that he had been wrapped up in a piece of fabric. His eyes widened in surprise as he opened them and saw what had been tucked all around him.

…Dooku’s cloak.

The governor’s first urge was to struggle out of it, but then he realised that his entire body was still shivering and the cloak’s warmth actually felt… rather nice. It was heavier than he had expected it to be, so it applied some gentle pressure too, which was strangely comfortable. Tarkin could not remember feeling so comfortable in the last few months. He just laid there on the floor with a bit of a confused expression on his face, wondering how he could have ever ended up in this situation.

His head shot up though, as he heard the sound of approaching footsteps.

“Ah, you’ve woken up again, I see”, Dooku remarked as he walked into the room after quickly glancing around the corner in order to see whether Tarkin was still out cold. “How are you feeling?” The governor looked away, his cheeks becoming red with embarrassment as he was ashamed to let the count see him all vulnerable like this. “…Better”, he mumbled reluctantly, hesitating as to whether he should say the thing he wanted to say or not before adding: “…The cloak feels nice.”

Dooku chuckled. “I thought it would”, he said. “I would have grabbed a blanket, but well… we don’t really have those on here, so my cloak would have to do. Are you all right to stand up and walk?”

Tarkin stared at him with a confused look on his face. What kind of question was that? “Why wouldn’t I be?”, he huffed, offended. The count looked at him with a deadpan look on his face. “Considering the fact that you laid passed out on the floor a mere ten minutes ago, I wouldn’t say the question’s an odd one”, he said. The governor glowered at him. “Yes, I am”, he eventually said, rolling his eyes. “Why do you ask?”

Dooku reached out with his hand to help Tarkin stand up. “You’ve probably noticed that we’ve just landed”, he said while the governor eyed his hand with suspicion for a moment, before taking it and getting up from the floor. “I want to show you our destination. A place where you’ll be safe from any prying Separatist eyes. They… were not happy with my decision to take you out of the Citadel, after all, so… best to be sure. Not to mention that you are going to need ample time to recover after the things they’ve put you through, so… I thought I’d show you. Will you come with me?”

Tarkin still glared at Dooku with suspicion. He had no idea what the count’s plan was with him, but he supposed that he could not stay in this spaceship either. He eventually acquiesced. “…I suppose I have no other choice”, he sighed, walking out of the room with Dooku. “…Though I still do not get why you are being this friendly with a captive.”

The count looked at him with a surprised look on his face. “…Tarkin, you are not my captive”, he said. “…That’s the whole thing. I took you out of the Citadel. Did… did you think that I was treating you like a hostage all this time…?” The governor shrugged. “Evidently so”, he simply said, before looking away and frowning. He… was not a captive. Or was Dooku only trying to make him think that, only to stab him in the back later? It was all still… very unclear to him.

There was one thing though… he had been out cold for a significant amount of time. And during all that time, the count had not harmed him at all. Instead, he… he had helped him, for some unfathomable reason. That was… one thing to be grateful about, he supposed?

He stayed silent for a while, before reluctantly glowering as a blush spread across his cheeks. “…Thank you”, he softly murmured with hesitation.

Dooku looked at him with a surprised look on his face. “…What?”, he asked. The governor went even redder in the face. “…I said thank you”, he muttered, fiddling with his sleeve. “…For… you know… the cloak and all… instead of killing me.”

The count chuckled softly, looking away as he rolled his eyes. It was going to take time and patience to learn this man that he had no nefarious goal with him… but if that was going to be necessary to repay him for indirectly causing him so much suffering at the Citadel… then so be it.

“I have no intention of harming you, governor”, he replied. “But it seems like since my previous dozen attempts of trying to tell you that have not been successful, this one won’t be, either. That’s all right… What’s most important is that you are all right, after all. Now… let’s go and see where you’ll be staying, shall we…?”

[torialefay]

Ooo new dorm arrangements! It made sense to me imo. Ive been a stay for a weird amount of time: started in 2019 and im on and off every other year. I usually listen to bands like ptv, sws, and bmth, uhhh... kinda the music my emo friends listened to in the early 2010s, so i end up coming and going.

Anyways, i remember watching "finding skz" and the survival show back in 2019/2020, and i think it's mentioned that when they all lived in one dorm, I.N. tends to clean up after them, but i think it was implied it was more like "maknae's chores." If my memory is still intact, I.N. everyones favorite roommate bc he's pretty organized and has good style... and he's the youngest, so they can dote on him but also boss him around lmao. Chan was the one most of them wanted to avoid rooming with purely bc he's not only organized, but he was strict on them and their leader, so he had the right to boss them around. They werent all familiar with each other on a personal level back then, just on a professional level, so it was kinda like rooming with your boss in a way lol. His tendency to go naked around the dorm and dote on them probably also contributed to that reason, but it was still really early in their career so they were reluctant to mention anything too """"scandalous"""" on camera. But yeah, those two together fit, especially now, since they've gotten to know each other a lot better and have chilled out.

Minsung together, obviously. I don't see them as clingy with each other as a lot of people seem to think. They're comfortable, secure, and read each other well. They dont necessarily need each other to live, but it's certainly much, much better together.

Changbin and Hyunjin. An emotionally aware person with a really emotional person. Changbin likes to play up his "crush" on Hyunjin for the camera, but i think he knows everyones boundaries enough to know when to reel it back. They seem to accommodate for each other and are still getting to know each other better, but then again, im not at all caught up on everything and dont know any of them personally lmao

Felix and Seungmin... for some reason, they seem both more emotionally attached yet also more emotionally distant than I see stay mentioning. The company's really pushing the "Felix is not human, he's a fairy" idea for a while now, and from an outsider's view, hes very pretty and im sure hes a very sweet person, but it looks a bit... tiring keeping that up.. and Seungmin is known for his "do what i want" attitude, especially lately with his "aiming for jyp" comments, and whatnot... idk where im going with this.... uhh ... well, i think their place is just them chilling. Just dudes being bros and getting a strong sense of being normal guys without the company rules on their image and being casual with each other. "Its not that deep until it is" vibes where they'll do the dude thing and not talk about their feelings much when they hang out, but every now and then, they'll let it all out, but its pretty rare.

you are kinda my life savor anon, coming through with all the hard-hittinf evidence to solidify my thoughts 🥺😂

i really do think the chan/i.n. dorm will work out great... other than innie having to see chris naked from time to time ig. but also, i feel like chris is kinda more respectful towards in??? idk it's just the vibe i get. and to be fair, i wishhhhh we got to see more of strict chris so bad. like when they talk ab it, i wanna see videos so bad. so if you have any recommendations, pls lmk. it's just so hard for me to picture him being scary 😭😂

oh no i agree 100%. like minho/jisung are just chilling to themselves most of the time, but i feel like they are also the type to be at their dorm and one of them is like "hey we got invited to go do xyz. do you want to go?" "not really..." and then they just smile at each other in unison bc it's easier for both to say no than just one. idk idk i feel like theyre just good for each other

oh yes, i'm firmly on team "changbin knows exactly what he's doing." like i genuinely feel so similar to changbin sometimes bc i am truly the same way, but like you can tell when it's a healthy vs unhealthy amount... and i think hyunjin likes that little bit of attention 😭😭😭 i think they're just good for each other

okay so i know felix is our sweet lil sunshine baby, but i just KNOW behind the scenes, he's way more "dude" than what his image shows. like idk if anyone has proof but i just feel it in my bones that he can be lowkey really crude & that seungmin eats that shit up. like i think seungmin probably finds it really fucking funny. bc we've all seen the clips of felix cursing... a lot. i just know seungmin is influenced by it. like 100%. seungmins "i'll fucking punch you".... yeah, those two belong together <3

editing to add: omg omg the emo and pop punk phase will also never die out for me 😭😭 we are one and the same baby. i finally got to see black veil brides a couple of years ago and it was like all of my teenage fantasies were coming true 😭😭

[thousand-winters]

Wolfpack + Dadrius

Send your troubles on a Penstagram text

Both of these intrigued me instantly 👀

Hello there!!! 💖

Okay, the first one is... I'm cringe, but I'm free /lh. So there's this parent-child pair in one of the most recent live action Star Wars shows that were driving me insane because... ashy blond kid with wolf stuff with a parent that loses it when they're in danger... so I ended up writing a bit of an AU for them AND Dadrius because I thought it would be fun. It's technically Star Wars universe because making SW AUs for my fandoms is my passion.

Little snippet of that:

The kids stumble together, avoiding falling onto the ground with a truly awkward turn that requires them to hold onto each other to avoid losing balance. It’s the same turn that seems to allow the boy to spot them, his face brightening with hope.  “Dar-!” Hunter chokes mid word, and his hands leave Shin to scratch at his throat with a panicked look. A quick look reveals Fourth Sister has her arm raised, her fingers twisted with all the anger she’s pouring on squeezing the boy’s throat. 

Now second one is more normal and it's regular TOH. It's Darius and Eber meeting each other for the first time and bonding. I have the hc that Eber and Darius ended up sticking together at first because people didn't take Eber seriously to the point they didn't bother to try to understand them when communicating, and while Darius wasn't nice, he wasn't rude about the fact Eber can't speak the common language, he was just irritated about Eber's behavior in general, which was good enough for Eber.

I have shared snippets from this one before for sure, but the title comes mainly because of that communication barrier. Eber might not be able to speak while being understood but he CAN sends messages through his scroll. Until Darius does learn their language out of pure stubborness, that's it (:

Thanks for the ask!!! From this ask game

[zhakyria]

So, writing has been slow, mostly because of the whole "where do I go and how do I write this" but I have been working on a few other snippets for other parts of the Cimarron AU.

I've determined that the Cimarron AU is basically a purgatory of sorts. It involves mostly SW Villains - usually my favorites, and a few extras that shouldn't really be there but somehow are. (I actually have a lore reason for this!)

For a brief overview - the Character dies and wakes up on a train to Cimarron, a small frontier town on a unnamed Wild Space world that is fairly disconnected from the rest of the galaxy. They have no memories accept for their death (usually), they do know their name, they still have access to much of their personality and knowledge they just don't have the context. They are called Ghosts by the locals because they only arrive on the Midnight Train and though they can take injury and illness like most people, they do not seem to age, and they cannot leave the area.

Most have come to consider it a second chance of sorts. Below the cut is one such snippet that I worked on last night. For when Thrawn arrives in town. In this AU Thrawn dies after Eli. Eli dies during the Ascendancy/Hegemony war, in the same manner as he described near the end of Thrawn: Treason.

“It was a suicide mission. In an effort to take an enemy down with us, I loaded an escape pod with as much explosives as I could, waited until it had been taken aboard the attacking warship, and then detonated the explosives.”

Thrawn's death memory however is fragmented, and almost seems to be multiple deaths with the 3rd one being the most shrouded (mostly because in Canon he hasn't been killed yet).

“Mitth’raw’nuruodo?”

That was his name, though it hadn’t been pronounced correctly. Still, it did feel odd to hear it, like it hadn’t been spoken in his presence in a very long time. Thrawn opened his eyes to find a human wearing an olive green Conductor’s uniform standing in the aisle next to where he sat. 

“Thrawn.”

“Pardon?”

“I would prefer if you called me Thrawn.”

“Of course. Thrawn. This is your stop.” The Conductor motioned towards the exit. 

Thrawn looked out the window briefly. It was dark out but he could see that they had stopped at a small frontier town. Though he didn’t know why or how he’d come to be here. His mind was blank, bereft of any memories of his past.

Yet something beckoned him forward. He rose to his feet, feeling a twinge of pain ripple through him, a tightening of his chest, and shortness of breath. He waited until his breathing returned to normal and then followed the Conductor to the exit. 

The depot was bathed in soft light. The temperature was warm but not unpleasantly so. Crickets were quietly chirping and oddly familiar music drifted in on the breeze. 

A man leaned against one of the pillars. His dark eyes were bright and he watched Thrawn step off the train with a curious expression; his easy smile causing faint lines to appear around his eyes. “So, you are Mitth’raw’nuruodo.”

It was a statement, not a question. Thrawn blinked. The man not only said his name correctly, but spoke Cheunh. The lilt of his accent made the language more melodic than usual. Like his name, he hadn’t heard the language of his people in what felt like a lifetime. He nodded and asked, “How did you come to speak Cheunh?”

The man shrugged. “It’s just something I know, I guess.” Then he stood up straight, and bowed. “I am Eli’van’to. I welcome you to Cimarron.” Eli paused and a brief expression of confusion passed across his face, before turning into a nervous smile. He rubbed the back of his neck and didn’t meet Thrawn’s eyes. “Eli is fine though. Honestly, not sure why I introduced myself like that.”

Eli was still speaking Cheunh and the bow was a common Chiss form of greeting. Something pulled at the edges of Thrawn’s mind. Like a shadow in his periphery but when he tried to examine it, it disappeared, and left a headache in its wake.

“You speak the language well.”

Heat flushed Eli’s cheeks and he nodded in acknowledgement.

* * *

Based on his own experience, Eli suspected he knew what Thrawn was going through, yet the Chiss continued to hold himself confidently, and he betrayed very little surprise at Eli’s use of Cheunh. Yet there had been surprise, Eli recognized the slight widening of the eyes. In fact, every micro expression Thrawn made felt familiar in a way that Eli couldn’t put a finger on. 

He also had a sudden reminder to carry pain inhibitors - a very specific type of pain inhibitors actually, though he wasn’t sure why. Perhaps it was an old habit he once had? The lack of memories always made discovering old habits or knowledge unnerving. Everything lacked context and history. It always left him wanting more information, wanting to somehow regain his memories and figure out what was going on. 

[meet-me-at-our-place]

@najatheangel

Hi there love! Apologies for the super dooper late ship but I hope this ship finds its way to you at the right time! Thank you so much for requesting! I truly loved doing this ship for you, it has definitely been one of my favourite ships to do <3 <3

~Your Company~ SM Entertainment  ~Group Name~ Pandora

~Members~  7

~Debut Date~ July 18th, 2022

~Pre-Debut Days~

Your optimism had you thriving throughout your trainee days even if you were training at a company as high up as SM. For the majority of your time you seemed to fly under the radar. It was difficult to cope in such a way but in reality this wholly benefited you in the long run. You could spend way more time putting energy into the areas of performing that you wanted to improve upon. This is the main reason to your success when you debuted. You were the quiet spoken but well adjusted trainee, even if something caught you off guard you remained level-headed. Sure you were stressed but you didn't let the others know that.

You excelled in your vocals almost immediately, it was clear that you had a story to tell and you did so through strong and stable vocals. Though you had a passion for dance and liked to spend time practicing you were already walking the path of being one of your generations iconic vocalists.

During this time you had spoken to some trainees and had been on a neutral note with all of them until the day you were selected as one of the members of Pandora. This is where your journey truly started and you managed to find a deep and unwavering friendship between your group members and other senior idols.

~About You~

~Your Position/s~ Main vocalist & Sub-Dancer.

You’re the duality queen! People don’t shut up about how kind and soft you are until you step foot onto the stage. You are quite vicious on stage, even if you don’t allude to other groups being rivals it is clear in your performance, you are giving your all so that you earn your spot as one of the icons of your generation. 

Everyone knows how soft and cute you are but your group promotes the baddie in you, you just bring the hyped up energy even if you are officially a sub-dancer.

Off stage you are someone who need's to be protected similar to your boyfriend you are just so honest, clumsy and goofy, leading you being one of the most biased members. You still act like an idol to some degree but it's also easy to forget you are one. Even if you aren't 100% humble you just act so normal, you're the type of idol to stop and have a conversation with fans who approach you. In other words SM needs to keep a close eye on you.

You came up with the idea of lives devoted to you painting or drawing while going over your day, some day's you even teach people how to draw. Your artsy side is one of your charming points, so much so that you created a wave of fans who just draw or dress similar to you. Basically you're an accidental artistic trendsetter.

Your members coddle you for sure, even if you insist that you should pull your weight or take care of them. It's just second nature to them, you're the one who they love to praise and protect. But this also gives them permission to playfully mock you, force you to do aegyo or poke your cheek. Your cheek is free real estate to them.

You're pretty active on your youtube channel despite being one of the more shy, introverted members you have the most content out as far as covers (singing and dancing) and lives go.

Your entire group is full of 5 star personalities who never underperform, this is especially true for you. Being strict and hard on yourself was a trait that followed you into debut, the one difference is that now you have your members who can sense that you are overworking yourself even if you don't say anything. They truly love you and will always protect your sanity. The Pandora members are truly your new family.

~Debut Song~

Kill the Lights in the style of Eve, Psyche & The Bluebeard’s wife by LE SSERAFIM

~Other Songs Include~

(That) Sexy Sway in the style of Get It by PRISTIN V

Paparazzo in the style of Movie Star by CIX

Prince of Spades in the style of Mayday by VICTON 

~Debut Album~ Like Royalty

~Stage Outfits~

~Relationships~

~Best Friend~ Jihyo (TWICE)

It is a no brainer that you became friends, you're both so authentic and honest with who you are. Which is why Jihyo chooses to give it her all in this friendship. You could also say that she was completely unbiased when first meeting you. It was early in your debut so she wasn't familiar with Pandora or their members, but through passing you met and she was pleasantly surprised with your humble nature. Sure you weren't far into your career but there was always the possibility that you were already big headed. Which wasn't the case.

Long after meeting continued to be a persistent thought in the back of her head until she saw you again and finally asked if you could hang out or if you had a way she could contact you. It was highly formal but it worked.

There are little to no secrets held between the two of you purely because you both have this kind of sixth sense. It detects when either one of you is feeling out of sorts or not voicing their opinion to the fullest; and Jihyo hates when you feel like you can't say what's on your mind.

Sometimes she can seem a little pushy, she really is an overbearing mum friend at times. But when all is said and done she really does mean well in her intentions. She will have your back for life, offering casual advice to ensure that you aren't led astray or feel alone. You're like a little sister to her. You brighten her day and she finds herself constantly checking for a dm from you, the regular "How are you?".

She is a fairly private person, but somehow you managed to get her to venture out for a coffee or a girl trip to Jeju Island. You have added so much to her life and she constantly wonders what life would be like if the two of you hadn't met.

~Friends~ Changbin (Stray Kids), Karina (AESPA), Taeyang (SF9), Chuu (LOONA), Miyeon ((G)Idle) and Kai (EXO).

~Boyfriend~ Mingi (ATEEZ)

The loved and cherished couple. When the news had broken out people were mildly shocked but definitely not surprised. In the time you were around Mingi you couldn't erase your bright smile which fans could see a mile away. You met Mingi at Inkigayo where you were both preparing for your live stages, the day was hectic and he had forgotten his phone in the dressing room he was in prior. In the time it took for him to backtrack where he had left it Pandora had moved into the room. You placed your bag down ignoring the phone that sat to the side of your right elbow. The creak of the door startled you as you looked up at the tall man standing at the door.

Mingi was an absolute mess, he knew how to be confident but in this scenario he was so unbelievably awkward. His voice slightly cracked as he asked if anyone had seen a phone lying around. It didn't take long for your eyes to fall onto his phone, holding it up you spoke in the sweetest voice he had ever heard. "I think I found it." Mingi walked over with a beautiful smile he grabbed the phone from you. In that moment both of you felt the electricity that started in his fingertips and ending in yours. Saying goodbye you wished him luck on his stage. "Thank you." and with that the rapper left.

After their performance had come to an end Mingi was sure that he had just met his lucky charm. Unfortunately for him he didn't even know the name of the angel who helped him out. So after a brief moment of self pity his gaze flickered over to a small screen playing your groups live performance. Amongst the other members he immediately recognized you, and his heart fluttered yet again. And the rest was history. After your performance Mingi managed to catch up with you and properly introduce himself

Both fandoms are hella possessive of the two of you, Atiny swear they haven't seen Mingi smile and blush this much and your fans can tell how much he has influenced you to be kinder to yourself. Mingi will always take care of you, he knows you can handle things fine on your own but that didn't change the fact that he loved you and would give you the whole damn world to you.

He is also your designated hype man, but you're his hype girl. If you have a sexy comeback stage he will be an absolute mess while loudly announcing that you were his while scolding the members for looking at you for a few seconds too long. You also do the same. When you saw the first Bouncy performance you were simultaneously on your knees and blowing up his phone with messages stating just how proud you were.

Your relationship is also one of the idol relationships that people use as an example that idols can have such a special connection with each other, but Mingi doesn't need that validation, he knows how lucky he is to have someone like you.

~Crushing on You~ Heeseung (Enhypen)

In some ways he felt like he had a lot going for him but something that bothers him is the way he blew it multiple times in a row while talking to you. Heeseung has rizz, but he also stumbles over his words when he is caught off guard. He truly just didn't expect you to be this attractive in person. Sunoo and Jake wouldn't shut up over how cool they found this new group Pandora's concept. And while Heeseung wasn't a fan he still thought you were wildly attractive and wildly talented. A fatal combo.

You have to be something amazing to leave THE Lee Heeseung a stuttering mess. He felt so fortunate to have so many opportunities to speak to you but he blew all of them so after a while he would just wave and shoot you a smile.

He felt broken honestly, he was so smooth on stage but for some reason he couldn't voice how he felt. After some time he began to lose hope, there was no way he could have a chance at dating you and he settled. However, his crush on you never went away. Even after news of you and Mingi dating made headlines he was still very humble and mature about it. You were such a kind and wonderful person and he still held his crush on you close to his heart.

~Other Idols Crushing On You~ Yeonjun (TXT), Kihyun (Monsta X), Taeyong (NCT), Gunil (Xdinary Heroes), Yeonkyu (ATBO), Jiung (P1harmony) and Ten (NCT)

~Extra Info~

Both you and Mingi are reality show champions not only are you two an amazing team you're also such an entertaining couple. People just love seeing how much you complete each other.

You branch out as a soloist for some time, though your still in Pandora you find great success and garner a new wave of fans.

~Scandal~ You were running late to your next schedule and appeared to be quiet rude and abrupt as you ignored fans who wanted to say hello.

[nny11writes]

I know it’s a bloodborne AU okay, but SW how the FUCK did you get that much crueler and more manipulative?????????? This whole first chapter with Micah is making my skin crawl.

[thatonebrazilian]

Sanctum

Part 1, part 2, part 3 (coming soon)...

Summary: Sanctum (noun) 1. a sacred place, especially a shrine within a temple or church. 2. a private place from which most people are excluded. After everything that happened, WestView became your sanctum. And you would not let anyone desecrate it.

(In which SW!Wanda shows up in a universe where her variant is dead. There’s only you and the boys. But this Wanda had never met you in her universe, and you were way too damaged and traumatized to let her in.)

A/N: I'm sick and tired of Wanda not being happy. First the movies, and now a lot of fics. I need this girl to be happy for once.

Also, I'm posting this on a whim, I normally like to have a few chapters written before I post anything (or at least an outlined plot), but SW!Wanda has been consuming my thoughts lately and I had to do something about it.

MULTIVERSE OF MADNESS SPOILERS AHEAD

Warnings: A bit of violence, I think.

Word count: 1500

Wanda could feel the girl’s startled breaths beneath her fingers, her hand wrapped tightly against America’s throat.

It was never supposed to be like this. She didn’t want to hurt this child, killing her through power absorption would’ve been faster, quicker, painless. But no, the girl had to fight, and Strange had to intervene.

She just wanted her children back.

America grunted, her fist glowing white, yet her eyes told the Scarlet Witch just what her mouth had told her before. She knew she couldn’t defeat Wanda.

“You want these powers?” America asked then, eyes watering “You can have them!”

A portal opened up, and Wanda wasn’t sure about America’s intent, but whatever it had been, America probably hadn’t taken into account how little control she had over her powers. The Scarlet Witch suspected the girl wanted to take her to Earth-838 to see all the damage she’d done personally, but instead, America took her to another Earth altogether.

Wanda didn’t know that, though, she didn’t think of anything when she saw the boys sitting on the couch. Her boys; her children. Billy and Tommy.

It was as if time had slowed down then, the children’s eyes widened and they tumbled out of the couch, scrambling away, getting as far from Wanda and America as possible. As if they were afraid of her.

Wanda swore her heart was breaking. Fear was never supposed to be the emotion in her children’s eyes when they looked at her.

“I-is that?...” Billy asked from behind the stairs’ railing.

“I-it can’t be…” Tommy said.

The Scarlet Witch looked at them, her fingers almost unconsciously letting go of America’s throat; her hand shook as she extended it in her kids’ direction, taking a step towards them.

“Boys…” she said, her voice trembling as much as her hands.

“Ma!” Billy yelled, frightened, trying to hide behind his brother.

“Ma! Help!” Tommy shouted too, standing protectively in front of his sibling.

Instead of a variant, as Wanda had expected, some other woman came running down the stairs. The Scarlet Witch couldn’t see her face; she felt a surge of fury when this woman gathered the boys, her sons, in her arms. The woman only then seemed to notice Wanda, finally raising her head to look at her.

Wanda’s breath was taken away, you were a marvel, beautiful in every way possible. If this was any other situation, if she wasn’t still in love with Vision, if she weren’t so hell-bent on getting her sons back, she may have admired your beauty more.

But at that moment all she wanted was for that stranger to get her hands off of her sons.

Upon meeting the witch’s eyes, your own widened.

“Wanda?” you asked then, pulling the boys behind you again, shaking your head “No, that’s not possible, you’re dead, you and Natasha- you’re…” you trailed off, eyes hardening. “God promised you’d be in Heaven, he said he had your souls, he promised you’d be happy…”

The Scarlet Witch furrowed her brows. What were you talking about?

“Ma, is this really her?” Billy asked then, looking at you.

Wanda saw your eyes glaze a little, she saw you looking up as if you could see something she couldn’t. She saw your shoulders sag a little, a defeated look on your face. You shook your head, then, looking at your child, her child, before turning to her with hardened eyes “this is not your mother, boys, get behind me.”

The Scarlet Witch’s eyes hardened as well. Who did you think you were, telling her sons to stay away from her?

“Don’t listen to her, boys” Wanda said to the kids, her powers glowing brightly in her hands, her eyes then focusing on you “these are my children.”

And then she saw your eyes turn dark, a black glow engulfing your own fingers. “Whoever you are, you’re not Wanda, and I’m not about to let you anywhere near my sons.”

Wanda felt the all-consuming rage inside her screech at your words, without even thinking she threw a blast of red magic at you, but to her utter surprise, and ultimate relief, you easily blocked it, protecting you and the kids from it.

“Stay back, boys!” you yelled at them, using your magic to send them further back into the kitchen, far away from the woman in front of you.

The Scarlet Witch was consumed by that ugly, mixed feeling inside her; there was rage, sadness, jealousy, grief, envy… She couldn’t think clearly, she just wanted her children back. She used her magic to make the sofa levitate and then threw it at you, but you stopped it midair. Wanda took advantage of your distraction, you were a bit preoccupied when the witch showed up above you, using her powers to blast you to the ground; the impact was such it created a crater, and your broken body lay in its center.

“Ma!”

“Mamma!”

The boys came running to help you, and to Wanda’s utter surprise, you easily stood up, using your sleeves to wipe the blood from your face. How, she wondered, was it possible for you to still be alive? Your body should have crumpled at the force.

“Billy, Tommy, stay behind me, I’m not gonna let her hurt you.” You yelled at the kids, levitating out of that crater, landing in front of the witch.

The kids listened to you, and Wanda found herself getting even madder. Who were you and how come her kids listened to you like this? How come they saw you as a mother?

Out of jealousy and rage, Wanda shot more and more magic blasts at you, but you simply blocked all of her strikes as if it was the easiest thing in the world. But then one especially powerful blast pushed you back, making your body go through the wall and out of the house.

“Leave our ma alone!” the boys yelled, picking up anything they could put their eyes on and throwing it at the witch. “Our ma will not lose! She has us by her side!”

Wanda’s eyes filled with tears. It was never supposed to be like this.

“Stay out of this, boys! Get out of the house, it’s not safe in here.” You said, flying back in as if you hadn’t just been thrown through a wall.

When Wanda saw the boys hesitating, but ultimately complying, she gritted her teeth. As soon as they were out the witch made the ceiling come down on your head. The structure of the house was already compromised enough, you lifted your hands trying to keep this place, your place, standing. You held off the ceiling and kept the wall from tumbling down, but Wanda didn’t stop, as you were trying to keep your house up the witch threw blast after blast at you, but each and every one of them splashed uselessly against a barrier made of black magic.

“Why aren’t you fighting back?!” Wanda yelled, tears pooling in her eyes “Fight me back!”

Wanda stopped shooting blasts at you when she felt something hit against her. It was a small ball of blue magic, she looked at the backyard through the hole in the wall you went through and saw Billy conjuring the balls and Tommy using a bat to throw them at her in record speed. She didn’t know what to do; she looked at the destroyed house, the frightened, brave children outside, and then at you. She sank to her knees.

“Why won’t you fight back?” she asked in a small voice, her face tear-stained.

You managed to mend the house, securing the ceiling back, strengthening the walls and the structure, and the boys came to stand behind you again. You looked at them and then looked at the witch.

You understood her.

“Because I can’t hurt you,” you said, walking towards her and cupping her face in one of your hands, gently wiping her tears away. “You may not be our witchy, but you’re still Wanda. I could never hurt you.”

Wanda looked at you then, the rollercoaster of emotions making her want to embrace the person she was just trying to kill. “But… who are you?”

Who were you? Which universe was this? And if there was a universe where she didn’t have her children, and a universe where her children didn’t have her, why couldn’t they just be together? There were a million questions haunting Wanda’s mind.

You smiled at her, a sad smile, it was almost as if you knew what questions were going through her head.

Maybe there was still time for this Wanda, maybe she could be redeemed. Everyone deserved a second chance, after all.

You got one, even when you didn’t want it, why shouldn’t she?

“My name’s Y/N, and…” you said, looking at Strange and the Chavez girl before bringing your gaze back to the witch “this is Earth-Delta… Your new home, if you don’t have anywhere else to go.”

[spicyghosts]

Harringrove, A/B/O AU

Ft. omega sw billy

So I've been thinking about this AU where o!Billy is a sex worker. He mostly specializes in helping alphas through their ruts. It's intensive, and dangerous, work but it pays well and makes it so he only has to work a few weeks a year to get the money he needs.

Plus most of the people that hire this sort of service are richer and it means that Billy gets to spend a week away from his father in his client's big fancy houses, even if he usually doesnt get to see much outside the bedroom.

In this AU this kind of sex work is in a legal grey area, and omegas who are infertile/unable to get pregnant can get more work/get paid better. This is because ruts can make many forms of birth control less effective and people that hire these sex workers like the extra assurance that they wont get baby trapped or anything.

Billy has medical paperwork saying he's infertile, maybe bc of an accident or something when he was younger? idk.

Billy's got a decent set up going, regular clients, a good reputation in the right circles, enough money for him to get by and save up to try and get out of his father's house as soon as possible.

But then things go to shit somehow and Neil moves them out to Hawkins (and takes all of Billy's savings).

Billy needs to rebuild his business from the ground up, only this time with no pre existing contacts and in a location where there just isnt as much work. Hawkins has almost none, and getting established with clients in Indianapolis is difficult when no one there knows you.

And with Neil making him pay rent and stuff, Billy gets a bit desperate.

So when he gets a call from someone in Hawkins looking to hire him for their alpha son he is very relieved. When he shows up to the big fancy house for the initial meeting, it does not go well.

There are a bunch of red flags and stuff that is normally an immediate deal breaker for him. Like, he's supposed to be able to meet his alpha clients before they go into rut but apparently the son of the woman who hired him is already in rut. And the parents want to change the terms of the deal last minute, and a bunch of other stuff.

But they're offering a lot of money, and he's desperate. So he doesnt call it off, and he doesn't leave.

The parents ditch before he can even ask them all the questions he has. Something about a work trip.

When Billy heads upstairs to find out that the alpha he's been hired to take care of is Steve, who he already met through school and fought that night at the Byer's, he almost just turns around and leaves then and there.

But, again, he's desperate for the money.

So he stays, and convinces himself that he does it because he already knows that he can take Steve in a fight, and definitely not because Steve seems absolutely miserable and obviously needs someone to take care of him since his parents fucked off to who knows where.

It does not go smoothly. But in the overall scheme of things it does go well.

Steve makes sure that Billy is hired again for his next rut, and that one goes even better. Then Steve asks Billy if he can hire him outside of his ruts too, and Billy probably would have said no back in California. But he's still having trouble finding clients here other than Steve, and he needs to try and save up again if he's ever going to have a chance to get out (and also he likes sleeping with Steve, but he's not going to acknowledge that aspect of it). So he agrees.

And... ? idk thats all i've got so far.

[robin-the-enby]

Missing scalpels

Pairing: 'Hawkeye' Pierce x reader

Summary: You can't deny your attraction to Hawkeye. Things get steamy between you and him, but things don't work out. As Hawkeye tries to understand why, the rest of the camp is busy trying to catch a thief.

Warnings: self harm, depression, adult themes (but not explicitly nsfw)

A/N: Am I really adding another fandom to write for when I haven't written for some others in ages, if at all? You bet! I'm also in a very angsty mood, so have this...whatever this is.

You've always admired his hands. The ones he used to save lives, even though the purpose why was highly debatable. The same hands that were used to holding a martini glass, ever so gently, were now exploring wildly your body, like if he didn't map out every curve of it in time, he'd die.

Captain Pierce, more widely known as Hawkeye, was a notorious flirt. If you wouldn't know better, you'd even go as far as to call him frivolous. But you knew better. Or, at least you'd like to think you did. There was so much more to the surgeon than he let on and maybe that was why you were letting him mold you just the way he wanted, just the way he liked. Even though he probably saw what you were about to do just as some fun, to take his mind off the constant death lingering all around him.

A particularly sensual nip at your neck brought you out of your thoughts and you realized that at some point you had closed your eyes. Deciding to endulge your neediness, you opened them to take a peek at your temporary lover.

Normally you wouldn't be able to tear your gaze away from Hawkeye, especially when he looked so disheveled, but instead, your eyes were drawn to the lightbulb hanging over your heads. You felt Hawkeye sneak his hands under your shirt and a shiver ran through you. You could hear the surgeon chuckle, but you grew more and more restless by the second.

It took everything in you to take your hands away from his body, but you managed to grab his hands, that were getting closer and closer to your chest. "Wait..." you whispered. Hawkeye's movements stilled as he waited for you to continue. "Shouldn't we turn the light off?" you asked sheepishly. The surgeon chuckled again as his hands picked up from where he left off "Why? Don't tell me you're ashamed of yourself." he started placing kisses onto your neck again as he murmured "I would have to show you why you shouldn't be."

This time, it was your turn to chuckle. He didn't show it much, but Hawkeye could be sweet at times. "No..." you breathed out "But- but what if someone comes here?" you tried to mask your uneasiness, your hands still trying to slow his down. "That won't happen." Pierce reassured you "Everyone is trying to catch some sleep, before the next choppers arive."

This time, you grabbed his hands more firmly. With your head hanging low, you stepped away from him "I'm sorry, but I can't do this." Hawkeye looked confused. Why the sudden change of mind? "What- why? Is it because of the light? If it's that important to you, we can turn it off." he tried to reassure you again, but you only shook your head. The more you thought about it, the less appealing the whole ordeal was. You were sure that his skilled hands would feel what you were desperately trying to hide, even if he couldn't see it.

"I'm sorry. I really am. It's not your fault Pierce." you told him, before quickly slipping out the door, making a beeline to your tent, leaving Hawkeye alone and confused.

It's not like Hawkeye had never faced rejection before. But something about this case bugged him. He couldn't get you out of his head. You seemed into it, into him, at the start. Did the light bother you that much? But you said you weren't insecure about yourself. Maybe you just didn't want to admit it. But even though that seemed like the most logical answer, something still wasn't right.

"Hey, Hawkeye!" BJ snapped his fingers in front of his friend's face and watched with a smile as he returned to the present time. "Rise 'n shine, sweetheart!" BJ laughed. But seeing the lack of reponse from his tentmate made him frown "What's up with you? You've been like this since yesterday."

When Hawkeye still didn't answer, BJ began thinking. "Did something happen with (Y/N)?" he asked. Hawkeye had been preparing to take their colleague out the whole day, so maybe something went wrong? "Nothing." BJ quirked a brow "So it went well?" he pried further. "No, nothing happened." Hawkeye grumbled from his cot. BJ was surprised "They rejected you?"

"No, they seemed really into it at first, but...then they suddenly changed their mind." Hawkeye explained. BJ hummed "Well, happens sometimes." "I don't know. Something's not right." Before BJ could respond, the door to the tent opened, revealing a frowning Charles. "Ah, Charles! Seems you're in a great mood as always!" BJ exclaimed. "Just like anytime I see the two of you." the surgeon snapped back.

BJ sighed "Great. Now I have to share the same space with not one, but two grumpy idiots." Charles looked appalled "Well forgive me for my sour mood, but medical tools have been mysteriously dissapearing and nobody knows why and who did it! I think that that is a more valid reason to be 'grumpy' than mulling over a date gone wrong." Charles protested. The last statement grabbed Hawkeye's attention "How do you know about that?"

"Oh please, is there anyone who doesn't?" Charles rolled his eyes "Everyone knows that you two were up to no good yesterday and when today morning during breakfast they showed up looking like a kicked puppy, even a blind man would see something went wrong." When Charles saw the surprised look Pierce gave him, he couldn't help but sigh in annoyance "Don't give me that look. Everybody's noticed how they eye you up anytime you're not looking."

Hawkeye's gaze turned to BJ, who uncertainly nodded. Hawkeye frowned "Then why did they change their mind..." he muttered, mostly for himself. But not quiet enough, as Winchester piped up "(Y/N) rejected you? A wise decision. In my opinion. If I was in love with someone, I wouldn't want to start something when I'm not even sure if the other one takes it seriously."

Was that really the case? Were you in love with him? He can't deny he'd be flattered, but...what would he do? Somehow, he couldn't bring himself to break your heart. But did he feel the same towards you?

"So, how long has equipment been dissapearing?" BJ asked when Hawkeye got lost in dreamland again. He'd help him if he asked, but right now, it seemed he needed to sort something out within himself. "Four months." Winchester nodded "One scalpel each month. It's possible that tools might get lost or accidentally thrown out, but four times? Month after month? Even colonel Potter thinks it's suspicious." Charles continued and BJ nodded. It was definitelly weird.

"I need to go." Hawkeye shot up from his bed and out the Swamp before any of the two men could say a word. What was he going to tell you? He had to admit that he didn't think what would happen after he'd sleep with you. He never did. Because it just wasn't needed. He'd get his fun and made sure the other one had fun too and that was it. So why was it that the thought of you seeing him in a bad light made his stomach squeeze? Maybe he knew but wasn't ready to admit it. Not yet.

The fact that you couldn't be found didn't help either. He checked everywhere. Post-op, mess hall, your tent, hell, even the showers! But it was as if you'd vanished into thin air. Hawkeye decided to take a walk around, to clear his thoughts, before doing anything else. You had to be somewhere. And even if he was sure you were avoiding him, he knew you couldn't keep it up forever.

As the surgeon neared the minefield, he saw a figure sitting on the ground. They were sitting at the edge of the field, so Hawkeye crept closer, as to not scare them, which could result in a very nasty accident. As he got closer, he recognized your hair. How couldn't he? He kept imagining how it would feel between his fingers.

"Hey, (Y/N)..." Hawkeye called out softly. You stiffened visibly and Pierce frowned. You were hiding something. "Go away..." you said softly, but he was already on his way to you. With quick strides, Hawkeye was soon in front of you and the sight before him shocked him. There you were, sat on the dusty ground, one arm resting on your leg, the wrist bloodied, while the other clutched a scalpel.

"What have you done..." Hawkeye whispered. Tears rolled down your cheeks. It was pointless to try and hide now. "Put it down." Hawkeye pleaded, but you only clutched your weapon tighter "(Y/N), sweetheart, please put it down. We need to get those wounds cleaned." For a second, you held onto the tool, before letting it clamper to the ground. Next thing, Hawkeye was crouched next to you, doctor mode on as he kicked the offending weapon far away from your reach and pulled out a handkerchief from his pocket.

"(Y/N) this will need stitches." Hawkeye said and looked at you with sadness in his eyes. You shook your head. "Don't be stubborn, this could get infected!" he growled, trying not to lose his temper. "I know how to take care of myself Hawkeye! I've done this a dozen times already!" Horror took over the man's face "What did you say?" You were so screwed.

"Where?" Hawkeye asked grimly. You shook your head. "Where. (Y/N)." he commanded. "Arms, legs, stomach..." you mumbled. Hawkeye could swear he was going to start crying soon."Wait here." he instructed and jogged off. As if you were planning on leaving.

In five minutes, Hawkeye was back with a first aid kit and started tending to your arm. "So the thief was you. Sneaky you." he joked, but his voice was choked up. You couldn't smile in this situation, but luckilly, he understood. When he was done, Hawkeye raised his eyes to your tear stained face "Can I see them?" Your eyes widened. "Just to make sure they're not infected. You slowly nodded and stood up.

You started by taking off your shirt, followed by your pants. Your body held numerous scars, some of them already white and nearly invisible, but most red and raised. Pierce thought he was going to vomit. There were so many. He wasn't disgusted. He had seen more gore in the last few years than most people in their entire life, but this was something completely different. Seeing someone he held dear mutilating themself this way...the sight was horrible.

"Please don't tell anyone Hawkeye." you pleaded as a fresh wave of tears made their way out of your eyes. Hawkeye wished he could argue with you, but he knew that if he told somebody, you would be immediately sent somewhere as bad as the war. So he nodded "But I'll be keeping an eye on those." he gestured to your wrist "And also that you don't steal any more scalpels, ok?" he smiled and it warmed your soul.

[pppixelgd]

How to not drop the level you’re grinding (and not lose motivation)

ok so I’ve been seeing this same process happen to most of the people I know

someone finds a demon they want to beat

they start grinding the demon

they have a bad experience with the demon

they drop the demon

repeat 20x

sooo

Here’s some stuff that helps me beat demons without dropping them

(please note that I have adhd so you might not relate to some of the stuff I describe)

Chapter 1. Physical stuff

1. Take short breaks

I know this might sound counterintuitive (I mean, if you play the level less you wont beat it as quickly, right??)

but, think about what usually happens if you play a level for too long

you play the level > get mad > you keep playing level > get more mad > you play worse because you’re mad > repeat until you drop the level due hating the level’s guts

and if you’re playing worse because you’re mad, you’re going to take longer with the level, and I’m assuming you don’t want that

I would suggest that as soon as you realize you’re playing worse due to anger, you should take a break until you aren’t angry and then continue grinding.

(and if you are still playing badly, that probably means you should probably stop playing for the day because you’re burning out)

2. Only grind levels you know you can beat

now, this may seem obvious, but I have seen almost all of my friends make this mistake

and that mistake is... *drumroll*

Trying to beat levels that aren’t their skillset and are too hard for them

I have seen SO MANY people think that they could jump to a top 10 from something cataclysm difficulty, hell, even I thought I could do it! But take it from someone who tried to jump to Sakupen Circles from cataclysm, jumping. sucks.

Why does jumping suck you ask?

it doesn’t have quick progress

now I know that sounds weird, but lets be real, you’re probably not gonna like a level if you’re only making progress once every 2 weeks

it’s missing that dopamine rush you get from making progress, and honestly, that completely throws me off tbh

3. list placements don’t matter

I’ve seen a lot people think that lower on the list = easier extreme = they can beat it

let me tell you this

List placements are based on the average opinion, and I am assuming your skillset isn’t perfectly average

if your skill set is wave and you’re bad at cube timings then you will think that sonic wave is easier than black blizzard, despite blbl being ~30 80 spots below sw, and vice versa

4. there are extremes other than list demons

not much more needs to be said about this

instead of looking at pointercrate to find extremes, just look through gd/youtube and play ones you find interesting, you’ll have a better chance at finding an extreme that you like if you do that

Chapter 2. Mental stuff

1. Don’t set your expectations too high

This.

I have seen almost all of my friends fall victim to this problem.

When you set your expectations too high, you wont be able to reach them, and if you don’t achieve your goals, it might lead to anger/sadness, and you might end up losing motivation with gd.

also, uhh, this too

1 ½ . Don’t set your expectations too low

If your expectations are too low, you will meet them too fast, and if you keep meeting them too fast, you will get used to achieving goals quickly, and then when you meet your first road block, and you don’t get it quickly like you’re used to, you will lose your temper wayy quicker than normal.

2. You wont become a pro overnight, don’t hope that you will

I know, I know, this is the most overused saying like.. ever, but its true!

you’re not going to become a pro instantly like spaceuk (unless you have savant syndrome or something), skill takes time to build!

and if you hope that you will just magically become a top player then you are just going to be disappointed

3. it’s ok to take a break

Please, never push yourself too far.

I have seen so many people try to keep grinding and grinding levels despite them being obviously burnt out. Hell, even I have done this on multiple occasions.

Yes, you are determined, but it doesn’t mean you shouldn’t take a break every once in a while

remember, this isn’t a competition, you can stop whenever you like.

Extra stuff

Keep calm during grinds

brute force determination is what will get you through the level

only beat levels you want to beat

play on whatever fps you want, ignore what people say

don’t play gd for too long

ok bye cya later