#Sakura would kick all of our asses and I respect her for it | Explore Tumblr Posts and Blogs

rivetwrites · 4 years

Text

//hello!! it's here!! it's my first fic, so it's not at my full potential yet! i had a lot of trouble with toko and syo. i tried my best to...at least remove the sneezing thing, but i know it's not perfect and i'm hoping to improve in the future! the ending is sort of rushed, as i was milking the last of motivation and ideas!! definitely not proof-read BAHHAHA

Byakuya Togami's Trial

Chihiro was dead. It was almost surreal, everyone promised not to kill anyone else. Yet it was in such a gruesome way. He was found in the girl’s locker room, which is strange, since he discovered to be a boy. Surely Monokuma knew about it, he knew practically everything about them.

Everyone was seated in their respectful places in the trial room. Kiyotaka looked the most nervous, but everyone looked the same. Who wouldn’t be? Chihiro was found strung up by his wrists and neck, “bloodlust” written in his own blood on the wall. And someone took the time to do that. Who would even want to hurt Chihiro? Sure, he’s an easy target, he wouldn’t have fought back, but he was the nicest one here.

“Let’s go over the rules once mo-” Monokuma had started, the bear sitting in his “judge seat.” But he was quickly interrupted by Byakuya, “Shut it. We’re starting.” That wasn’t unlike him, but he had a small smile on his face, almost like he was excited to start the trial. Who the hell would be excited to discuss one of our dead friend’s death? And convict someone and send them to their own death. “Very well! Since Togami thinks that he’s the judge, we shall start!!”

Of course the discussion went to how Chihiro even got to the girl’s locker room. Monokuma had stated that he did know that he was a boy, so it would’ve been impossible for him to get into the room on his own. “Obviously he was dead before he even went into the girl’s locker room,” Byakuya started, “then strung him up onto the wall. Doesn’t the position of his body look familiar, Makoto?” He looked over at the small boy, who perked up at his name.

Yes, it did look familiar. Makoto had seen similar positioning in the book that Byakuya showed him in the library. The cases with Genocide Jack. But Genocide Jack wasn’t here. He couldn’t be. As soon as Makoto mentioned his name, Byakuya looked over at Toko, who seemed to have almost burst a blood vessel.

“Genocide Jack is a lot closer than we think, Makoto,” he hummed, his hand resting on his chin. Toko looked like she wanted to jump over her table to kick his ass, but she was starting to panic. “Y-you promised n-not to tell anyone, B-Byakuya!” It had only hardened the case that Toko was Genocide Jack. On cue, from the sudden conviction and stress that she had been forced to endure, her eyes rolled back as she fell onto the floor.

Makoto had jolted up to help her up, which Togami gripped his arm tightly. Toko had started to stand back up, but she looked so different. This wasn’t Toko, it couldn’t be. She had flashes of both anger and slight arousal as she started laughing hysterically. Her voice radiated throughout the trial room, high pitched and unnerving. Her laughter soon died down to small chuckles and giggles, her wild eyes looking at Makoto. Well, it looked like she was looking at him, but her eyes seem to not have acknowledged him. “You caaaallled? Master has called me! Ooooh!! I’m guessing it was about me, huh huh huh?” Her voice sounded completely different compared to Toko’s quiet, stuttering voice.

Once Byakuya started explaining how he found out about Genocide Jack, she seemed confused. “That’s what they call me? I’m not some guy! Genocide Jill, or Syo would do for me!!” Her sentence followed with her cackling laughter. Tok- Syo, was definitely confused when everyone started to convict her of being the murderer. “Whaaat? No way! Makoto! You should see a pattern of my kills!” Of course she went to Makoto. But she was right. She only killed boys. But once Byakuya stated that Chihiro was yes, indeed a boy, she almost looked disappointed. “Awhh!! Now I wish I killed him! But I didn’t! I don’t use those weapons! Plus, an electrical cord?” Again, she was right. All the pictures consisted of the boys being pinned up by scissors.

Makoto was about to state that she didn’t have any, but it was shot down when she already had two scissors in her hands. Well, now the suspicion went to Byakuya. He was the only one to know of Genocide Jack, besides Makoto, who had an alibi. Togami looked like he was about to snap, but clicked his tongue. “Obviously I couldn’t have done it. I saw Mondo leaving the girl’s locker room,” that sentence brought Mondo’s attention. “You fucking strung Chihiro up?!” Thankfully Sakura was within arms reach of Mondo, because he was about to fucking kill Byakuya.

“I simply wanted to make things interesting. You wouldn’t want a boring trial, now would you?” He still had a cool smile on his face, but his back was tensing from the sudden threat of Mondo actually getting to him. “Why the fuck would you do that?!” Owada’s voice started getting furious and loud. Kyoko put one of her gloved hands up, her eyes glaring at Byakuya with clear disgust before saying that we should continue the trial before times up.

Now everyone looked over at Mondo, who looked extremely guilty. Before people even began to shoot questions at him, Kiyotaka’s voice triumphed over theirs. “N-no way! Mondo would never! We’re bros, he’s not that kind of person!! What kind of people are you?!” Mondo looked just as astonished at Taka defending him, especially in such an aggressive manner. It was very unlike him. Mondo wanted to confess so badly, but something inside him, anxiety and fear prevented him from doing so. But all the evidence started pointing to him. Celeste said she saw Chihiro late at night with a workout bag, how Mondo said the correct colour of the tracksuit, how he was strong enough to swing that weight at him. It was all clicking into place, and now looking horrible for Mondo.

But it didn’t make sense. Would Chihiro be able to die from one swing? There was only one head wound, quite a bit of blood, but would he be able to die? Or simply be knocked out. Mondo wasn’t the...brightest of the bunch, so would be able to know that he didn’t actually kill him? Kyoko had the same thought, her eyes scanning Mondo’s face as she spoke up, “Were you sure that Chihiro was dead?” Straight to the point. Owada looked confused, his brows furrowing, “...Yeah. I carried him to the girl’s locker room. He wasn’t breathing.” Which is understandable, but if you get knocked out, especially by such a big guy like Mondo, your body can seem dead.

“Obviously he was dead. I checked beforehand.” Byakuya tapped his glasses, his voice speaking matter of factly, but it still didn’t make sense. “Togami, your breathing stops and your pulse goes faint when someone knocks you out,” Makoto piped up. He wasn’t trying to accuse him, but he was looking at every option. Their lives are on the line. “What’re you saying, Makoto? That I killed him? I’m telling you, he was already dead!” His voice started to falter, like he was starting to believe it himself. He didn’t properly check Chihiro before he hung him up, but he didn’t want to admit it.

Byakuya turned to Monokuma, “Bear! Tell them that I didn’t kill him! There’s no way!” The smile that he held had fallen as soon as he was being suspected. Monokuma didn’t respond, only a soft “puhuhu” coming from him. Sweat started to bead on Togami’s forehead, looking back at the students, “There’s no way. I didn’t!” No one was defending him, well, except Syo, but even then, she wasn’t taking it seriously. “When I was checking his body,” Sakura finally said, crossing her arms across her chest, “his lips and fingertips were blue. Which I’m pretty sure wouldn’t happen if he was already dead.” In which, Kyoko confirmed that it’s true.

Now everyone’s eyes were on Byakuya, who looked disheveled and anxious. He looked like he was at his breaking point, the reality hitting him that he, Byakuya Togami, had killed Chihiro by accident. He didn’t mean to in the slightest, but the chance that he did was eating him up.

Though, the one who looked the least anxious and sad now, was Taka. The weight of grief was lifted off of his chest, that maybe, just maybe, his bro was safe!! Mondo, not so much. He felt a weight of guilt on his own shoulders. He caused Chihiro’s death. It’s his fault. All his fault. He never felt worse. The boy trusted him, and he just- Mondo was thrown out of his thoughts at Monokuma’s voice. “All right!! Time to cast your votes! I will change this a bit!! Whoever has the most votes between Togami and Owada, will be chosen! Now it’s just luck! Puhuhuhu!!”

There wasn’t enough time to actually get a confession. But even they don’t know. Guess it was just luck. The voting time was a lot longer, which they couldn’t choose to be thankful over, or to be fucking terrified. Finally, the votes were in.

Byakuya had the most votes.

The look of horror on Togami’s face was...almost priceless. When Monokuma pulled the slot game to reveal his sprite, they were correct. Byakuya did kill Chihiro. It felt like fiction. Actually, this entire fucking game felt like fiction to them, but it was all real. All the deaths were real. Sayaka, Junko, Leon, and Chihiro were all gone, and Byakuya was next. The tall boy didn’t even want to believe it, his jaw opening and closing as he tried to think of a rebuttal. But it was already decided. Byakuya killed Chihiro, it was over.

They all left their stands, off the court to discuss, but Byakuya was near unresponsive. It was...strange. He always had something sarcastic to say, just like he said to Leon before his execution. It was...quiet. Probably out of shock, no one expected Byakuya to kill someone. Byakuya being a victim, yes, but not him being a murderer. Mondo seemed to have calmed down, well, as much as he could during the situation. Sakura still had to hold him back by the arm so he didn’t commit his own murder right in that trial room.

“Puhuhuu! What a twist!! I do love surprises, isn’t that right Togami?” Monokuma looked down at the man from his seat, “I mean, you do love surprises!” The words were almost taunting Byakuya, beads of sweat trailing down the side of his face. He looked...defeated. Togami didn’t even care that he was going to die, just to be found out, just to be wrong, really hit him like a truck.

No one wanted to say anything, the only words to be heard was Mondo’s hisses of rage and Taka’s reassuring words to his bro. Makoto was the first to say something, “Chihiro would be alive if you didn’t do that stunt, Byakuya.” It caused the taller man to snap his neck to look at Naegi, his gaze being a split of sorrow and...almost anger. Before Byakuya could even respond, Kyoko piped up, “it was stupid of you. I didn’t expect something that disgusting to come from you.” It was harsh, probably the harshest that Kirigiri has been up to that point, but no one could really blame her.

Byakuya felt like he should...apologize, but pride inside of him refrained it. They weren’t good enough to hear an apology, so he stayed silent. It only displeased everyone, Sakura now having to hold back Aoi from smacking him as well. Since the conversation was going nowhere, Monokuma decided to end it himself, “Huh! I thought we were going to get, ‘oooo, I’m so sorry! Forgive me, don’t do this! I need to be there for the Togami’s!” His words were mocking, draping the side of his body over the arm of his chair dramatically before laughing, “buuuut, I wouldn’t expect anything less from you! P-p-p-punishment time!!”

It was almost ceremonial to see Byakuya being dragged off with little to no resistance. He didn’t want to look like a fool, especially the last time they ever get to see him. Kiyotaka would usually look away, hating seeing the death of people who, in his opinion, ultimately didn’t deserve it. But he was the one in the front, watching everything unfold. Mondo tried to get him away, not really wanting Taka to get sad again, but he refused, pulling away from his bro’s touches.

Instead of watching it first hand, they looked up on the big screen. It flickered on, the colours warping to what...seemed to be Byakuya. He was wearing very beat up clothing, filthy with dirt. He was looking down at his attire, a look of pure disgust on his face. He was...a “commoner.” Monokuma popped into the scene, wearing an elementary student uniform. He had a huge pile of rocks, ranging from small pebbles, to near huge stones that he could barely hold. The name of the execution finally appeared on the screen:

Human Disqualification

The music playing in the background was almost somber. Until Monokuma started pelting the stones at Byakuya. Look of pain of agony appeared on Togami’s face as he was forced to endure the hard rocks hitting his skin. Welts and bruises started to appear as time went on.

Stoning someone to death took ages, especially from only one person doing it. But everyone sat in watch. Not like they had other things to do, they weren’t allowed to leave. But people were allowed in. Everyone was so distracted, Aoi cringing every time the stones hit a more sensitive place on Togami. No one spoke a word, but they didn’t have anything to say anyway.

Until they heard the courtroom door open.

It was so sudden, even causing Sakura to jolt slightly from the sudden change of noise. Everyone’s head whipped around to see what has caused it. Definitely not one of them, since they were too entranced by Byakuya’s execution, which was still happening slowly. Small footsteps seemed to have been getting closer, and they were very uneven and tended to scrape on the floor ever so often.

...Chihiro?

The small boy looked rather...sullen. His blood was stained on his clothes and the right side of his face, his neck and wrists bruised from the blood rushing to them. It was...strange. Why was he here? Was this some kind of sick trick that Monokuma was playing? That thought was immediately debunked as Chihiro spoke,

“D-did I...miss something?”

He seemed so confused and...understandably upset. He had woken up in a small pool of his own blood, his neck and wrists sore from the constant pressure of the electrical cord on them, no one around the entire school. He had assumed there was another murder and that he just wasn’t told, so he went there himself.

But everyone was staring at him. It was starting to make him nervous, having so many eyes on him, Byakuya’s execution in the background. Huh, Chihiro didn’t expect him to be able to kill someone. Kyoko was the first to speak up, of course, but even she had a look of shock on her face, “You’re...supposed to be dead. Byakuya killed you,” her voice was still as calm as ever. It was sort of hard to hear her over Yasuhiro’s shrieks of terror at the boy’s “ghost.”

A look of terror appeared on Chihiro, tears filling his big eyes as he looked up at the huge screen, “B-but, I’m not! I-I promise!” It was obvious that he wasn’t dead, but it was mostly to soothe Hiro. But if Chihiro is alive, then Byakuya has no reason to die. Makoto was able to shout loud enough, “M-Monokuma! Chihiro is alive!!” It caused the Monokuma on the screen to turn to the camera, an obvious look of confusion on his face. The robot paused for a moment, not responding, almost like he was...checking that what they were saying was true. He quickly returned, a loud sigh of...annoyance emitting from him as he was forced to stop the execution.

After all, he wasn’t allowed to break his own rules.

Byakuya was quickly let back into the trial room, bruises and cuts all over his body as he was still wearing the “commoner” clothes. He fell to his knees in front of a very confused Chihiro, which caused the small boy to back up a few steps. Togami reached for the boy’s tiny hand, pressing small kisses to his fingers as he apologized. His voice sounded broken and saddened. His ego was just crushed to death. He didn’t even care who was looking, nor how he even looked like in that moment.

Chihiro looked visibly uncomfortable, trying to tell him that it was okay - though it kind of wasn’t - and that he shouldn’t apologize like that. It took Sakura and Aoi to drag Byakuya away by the shoulders, forcing him to let go of the boy’s hand. He didn’t speak to anyone else, still spewing apologies at Fujisaki. It was almost laughable. Surely, Mondo would’ve been laughing straight at his face at it, but the total shock to see Chihiro alive really hit him. He had pulled the small boy close to his chest, his own apologies leaving his lips. The boy welcomed this one a bit more, his cheek resting on his shoulder. Though, Mondo felt like he shouldn’t be forgiven. He had almost killed the boy.

But it was okay for now, they were alive, and somehow Byakuya was able to survive another day. Mondo promised not to beat him alive...yet, as long as Chihiro and Kiyotaka was alive, he was going to be okay.

45 notes · View notes

thecandywrites · 4 years

Text

Jewel Of The North Part 11

Woo, this was so much fun. Karma begins to sink her teeth into Alorna and Doug. Meanwhile Noah and our dear reader Zara draw closer and closer. Que- Lady in Red.

Many thanks to @monstersandmaw for sharing ice orcs with me. I am having a blast. Enjoy.

Jewel Of The North

Part 11

The next morning, you accidentally slept in because you were up half the night getting some of the best sex of your life and reconciling with Noah and having the best heart to heart while you were fucking the other’s brains out and this morning you felt like you were running around like a chicken with your head cut off trying to get ready on time and Noah walked you to the spa himself and you weren’t five steps from it before you saw Alorna and Doug at the counter, getting last minute upgrades on their services and about to go into it and both you and Noah stopped dead in your tracks and gasped and squeezed the other’s hand tightly and you doing that made Alorna and Doug turn around to look and one look made them freeze and breathe in tightly and the looks on their faces were priceless as they looked like they both had been caught with their pants down as both you and Noah quickly got your phones out and got pictures of them, together for proof of where they were and why the couldn’t be found back on the mainland.

And seeing them, you and Noah looked at each other before looking back at them and started busting out laughing and pointing because the odds of the four of you meeting back up, let alone like this- was astronomical. So it was either by fate that you met or by the craziest coincidence. Yesterday you would have wanted to beat them both to a pulp. Today- though, you didn’t care. You had your family and a clean conscience and you knew they couldn’t boast of that last one and you knew Karma was about to bite them in the ass and you knew that justice was coming for them and for you.

“Oh my gods, you left John for Doug?” Noah asked his sister.

“What if I did?” Alorna shirked with a shrug.

“I mean you’re a stupid, faithless bitch either way and incase you missed it, I officially disown you. By the way, since you seem to have been ignoring your phone, I think you should know I got a text from your soon to be ex husband, telling me that you had skipped out of town on a cruise and he officially called all his credit cards that you have- in as stolen and cancelled your check card and kicked you off the checking account at the bank. And his lawyer is expediting your divorce and all your stuff is at the community center and that he changed the locks on the doors. But at least he left you your car.” Noah informed her as he pulled up his text from John on his phone and read it off to her.

“What?” Alorna blanched as she came over to look at his phone to read it herself.

“Even if that’s true, Sweetheart, you can move all your things in with me.” Doug offered Alorna which made her beam smugly at her brother.

“Thank you Baby, I knew I could depend on you.” Alorna practically sang as she sauntered back to him and kissed him sweetly as you just stood there and shook your head as you texted your picture to Summer and gave her the update as even more updates came pouring into your own phone.

“Well, if you’ll excuse me, I have an appointment I need to keep.” You excused yourself and went up to the desk to check in for your own appointment.

“What are you getting done?” Doug asked you curiously from down the counter.

“Nothing. It’s an interview and sales pitch to be an onboard LMT, I get the ultimate cruise experience and elite package in a King’s Suite for free just for about an hour or so of my time and any money I spend on this cruise, I write off as a business expense, both personally and from a business expense for all of my businesses. So while this cruise is free, I get to enjoy a twenty thousand dollar tax break for myself and for each of my businesses, which considering all four of them and counting myself, is a whole hundred thousand dollars. Not bad for an hour or two of my time eh?” You returned with a smugness of your own as Doug and Alorna’s jaw dropped in jealous disbelief.

“Enjoy your time at the spa.” You offered sweetly before you paused and turned to address them head on.

“Oh by the way, before you go, I should remind you- just in case you didn’t know, there is always legal backlash for defaming and maligning a priestess of Aura. Because my lawyers have already been in contact with every single elder in every clan up here and especially with every single elder on the councils and got so many statements of what you two said about me to them and already have more than enough evidence to sue you both and it doesn’t matter if and when which of you turns on the other or not, both of you will answer for what you’ve done. You should know that the last person to defame a priestess of Aura, was sued for a 150 million dollars in damages, and the out of court settlement ended up being 15 million. So you’ll be hearing from my lawyers when you do get home and currently you’re both in the process of getting warrants out for your arrest because defaming and threatening a public figure which all priestesses of Aura are, is an arrest-able offense in every country in the world and an expedite-able offense too. So enjoy jail. I doubt anyone but me will have pockets deep enough to bail you out and there’s no way in hell I would ever do that either. But I hope this little affair was worth it for you.” You offered, your tone sweet as honey but the gravitas of what you were saying hit them both like a ton of bricks Noah beamed the happiest, proudest smile.

“Yes! In your faces motherfuckers!” Noah cheered as he gave them both the bird.

“Baby, I’m gonna be sitting right over here until you get out.” Noah informed you happily as he pointed to a chair before he strutted over and settled into it.

“You’re lying. That’s the worst bluff I’ve ever heard.” Alorna scoffed at you.

“I guess we’ll see when you get off the ship, in any port you do get off at. You’ve fucked around, now you get to find out.” You smiled smugly back with a shrug.

“Ms. Kingsley?” Sharon- the spa’s manager called when she came out.

“That’s me.” You confirmed as you went over to her and shook her hand and went back with her into the spa for your interview.

“What if she wasn’t bluffing.” Doug murmured to Alorna before their own therapists came out to get them.

“She has to be, she’s just trying to get the last word and the last laugh and steal our fun. It’s not gonna work.” Alorna insisted but Doug wasn’t sure before they went back into the spa.

Noah happily texted his mom that you and him had fully reconciled and that he had told Alorna the ‘news’ of John’s divorce as his mother confirmed everything you had just told Doug and Alorna and that yesterday, shortly after you left, that she had gotten a call from a lawyer asking about the incident and that not only did she and Ukluk confirm the case, but so had Isla, Tonrar and everyone else involved and that the clan law was in the process of getting modified by each clan and that each clan was offering Zara a share of the tribal lands as recompense for believing the lies about her and were working on a formal apology and would be officially stripping Alorna and Doug of their clan standing and ties and that the police were involved and that there were indeed warrants out for their arrests and that cops were already contacting the cruise ship to let them know they were harboring wanted individuals.

Noah simply giggled gleefully as he got up and went to the closest bar and got a celebratory drink before settling back into his spot.

Finally, after all this time, and pain and heartache and damage, his sister and Doug had caused, they were getting what was coming to them. Karma was real and was gonna bite them in the ass soon enough. And the best part about it, is he didn’t have to lift a finger and neither did you. All he had to do was stand by you and do right by you from now on, which he was more than prepared to do. Never again would he waiver from you. Because while you had lost the battle the other night, you sure as hell were going to win the war and just because you weren’t physically fighting or combative, didn’t mean that you weren’t fighting back, you were just fighting back in the best way possible. You were going to hit where it would hurt them the most. And Noah for one would rather get the shit kicked out of him rather than be abandoned by his clan. So he was supremely grateful.

He pulled out your check that had been in his pocket, and turned it over to read the back one more time.

‘Dear Noah, please don’t think that I’m giving up. I’m not. I will never give up, not on you or on Sakura. And I will fight till my last breath for you both. I don’t want you to have to choose between your heritage, your culture and your birthright- and me. You deserve both. You both deserve everything you want. Love, happiness, honor, pride, heritage, roots and family. When you read this. I hope you’ll understand that as a priestess, there are rules I have to follow while in regalia. And I hope we find each other again soon. No matter what happens, I will always love you both- Sincerely, Zara.’

Even now, Noah wiped a stray happy tear from his eyes as he pressed the check to his heart. He had been a fool yesterday. A thankless bastard, a reprehensible asshole. But you redeemed him. Even when you shouldn’t have. And for that, he would always be grateful. And love you unconditionally and always treat you with the utmost care and respect. And treat your children as his own. Even if they both hated him at first. He would win them over by staying true to you and them. And he was always going to have your back and theirs and be the trustworthy rock you and they needed. He silently prayed to every god you both believed in and vowed this to them and when he had finished. A renewed sense of peace and happiness came and settled in him and renewed his spirit.

The interview process did take about an hour and a half. But you came out of the spa, happy and smiling and laughing with the spa’s day manager before you practically strut over to him.

“So? How’d it go?” He asked before you slid into his lap and drank the rest of his drink.

“It went great, they offered me a job but sadly I had to turn it down because I actually want to be around for my kids and possible new husband and can’t do that living on a ship full time.” You hinted.

“They have a jewelry store on this cruise ship right?” Noah asked. “I can get you a wedding ring right now.” He offered.

“Don’t you dare, the jewelry on this ship is cheap in quality and sky high in price. I would much rather have a traditional ring from the clans or bead in my hair or whatever. Besides, if you do get me a ring, it’ll live on this necklace or any other necklace you get for me because I can’t wear jewelry on my hands for work. But I would wear it on my off days and special occasions.” You answered.

“Besides. Call me old fashioned, but I want a traditional wedding with all the friends and family and all that and not some last minute thing on a cruise ship.” You urged him.

“Me too.” Noah simply grinned as he happily wrapped his arms around you and held you comfortably.

“So, let’s go get some brunch.” You urged him before you got off of him and offered him your hand to help him up which he gratefully took and once he was up to his full height he returned the glass to the bar and walked down to one of the restaurants on the ship with you comfortably under his arm.

“I will say this though, could we get you some nice dress clothes for dinner?” You asked as you walked down the hallway with your own arm around his waist.

“Sure.” Noah answered before you both gorged yourselves on a brunch then went shopping to get Noah a few things for the remaining nights of the cruise, including a black suit with a black dress shirt and black dress shoes with black socks with a few different ties and handkerchiefs that would match the dresses you brought so that you would match and so that Noah’s suit would be versatile.

“Aww, I see you found her.” Maggie said as you guys walked past the customer service desk together, both of you carrying several bags each.

“I did.” Noah grinned proudly.

“So- what did you forget?” She asked you curiously.

��His heart.” You answered truthfully.

“Awww!” She gushed. “Really?” She asked as she looked from the two of you.

“Yeah, we’ve been falling for each other since we first met each other, and it just took one good kick in the pants for me to come to my senses and come after her.” Noah revealed.

“What was your kick in the pants?” She pressed giddily.

“This.” Noah said as he showed her the back of the check before she and everyone else at customer service read it and started crying once you explained the whole story after putting your things on the counter so you wouldn’t have to keep holding them and it freed your hands up for your gestures.

“So, I actually won’t be needing my cabin. I’m rooming with her.” He nodded over to you.

“Well then I guess you need a refund for your suite don’t you? I mean you didn’t even really use the room at all, barely stepped your foot in it. So it doesn’t count, besides, we need the room for other guests anyway.” Maggie insisted before she got his room card and re-programed it so it would work for your room instead.

“And I got you some ship credit for whatever else your hearts desire while sailing with us for any “inconvenience”. Oh this is straight out of a movie I swear!” Maggie swooned happily as she typed on her computer before she printed out receipts and stuff for you both.

“Thank you so much for sharing. I ship you guys so hard. Here’s my email address, email me what happens, I want to know.” She insisted as she wrote down her personal email address to you.

“Definitely.” You grinned before you got your stuff and went back to your suite together and got ready for dinner at the cruise’s most fancy restaurant.

“Wow.” Noah breathed in awe before he wolf whistled at you from the comfort of the couch in the suite when he saw you walk out of the bathroom in a red dress that hugged your curves gorgeously and was sexy as sin. Your hair was done up, your makeup flawless, the red of your lipstick matching the shade and tone of the dress perfectly and your jewelry he could tell was older and most likely inherited from your late adopted grandparents.

“Thank you.” You thanked him bashfully as you struck a few seductive poses for him.

“That’s going to be real fun to take off.” Noah grinned as you could already see the beginnings of a hard on tent his pants.

“Yes it will. Later of course, not right now, we have a reservation to keep.” You urged him as you got on two different pairs of shoes.

“The red or the black?” You posed as you stood before him, switching from one foot to the other.

“They both look amazing, pick whichever one is more comfortable.” He urged you.

“They’re about the same. I’m going with red. Save the black for the little black dress.” You decided before you walked over to a chair and put the other red shoe on the other foot so now they matched before you found your shawl and put your things in a little clutch. “You ready?” You asked once you were all put together as you draped the shawl around your shoulders.

“Ready.” Noah said as he turned the TV off and got up from the couch and straightened himself up before he was by your side in just a few strides and happily escorted you to dinner and smiled so proudly when everyone you walked past seemed to stop and stare at you strutting past them. You could tell most of them wanted to say something, a few of the brave ones whistling lowly after you passed them but one look from Noah had them biting their tongue and looking away guiltily. While Noah looked perfectly dashing- he was an ice orc after all and therefore- not someone to mess with and Noah happily escorted you to the restaurant where you got seated at a table in the center of the restaurant where you happily shrugged your shawl off and laid your clutch next to you in the comfortable armchairs.

Noah wanted to pinch himself. Two weeks ago, he was bartering flights and airplane fuel and googling what he could make for dinner with only two or three ingredients and a handful of spices and he felt like he was treading water, barely keeping his head above water and begging his garden to ripen his produce faster so he could eat it and use it and he had been so grateful that Taylor had recommended him to you. You were one of the first clients to not haggle. He had given you a high price to start with, expecting to be haggled down. But you had accepted it and even sent him a deposit and that had set him straight and it was enough to ease the sinking feeling and gave him breathing room. And then the moment you walked into his life. Suddenly money was the last thing to matter to him. For the first time since childhood, money was not a major factor in anything. All that mattered was Sakura and you. Your safety, your wellbeing, your comfort, your happiness. And when you took to Sakura as easily and readily as you did, all he could do was thank the gods for answering his prayers for allowing the right woman into his life and Sakura’s life and for giving him the patience to wait for her. You were like a soothing balm to all the wounds losing Neena he and Sakura had sustained.

Neena, while she was traditional in most senses and was an excellent mother and careful with money and expenses and incredibly thrifty and resourceful because she had to be, she was easily contented and not demanding at all, however she wasn’t the greatest lover, or cook. She was very reserved. And not expressively passionate.

But you? Passion and heart, feeling and intuition was in everything you did. You were mild, gracious and generous when you wanted and needed to be but you didn’t let anyone walk all over you or take advantage of you and very protective. You were balanced between open yet discrete and an excellent judge of character. And you created such a safe, wonderful, nurturing, welcoming and relaxed environment wherever you were. And you were always, always- professional. You garnered respect wherever you went and whatever you did. And you were a goddess in both the bedroom and the kitchen and the perfect fit.

He felt guilty comparing you with Neena. It wasn’t fair to either of you. He had married Neena out of obligation, because Isla had arranged it since his youth and being married to her was a lesson in patience and persistence and learning to adjust to the other and learning to be a team. But to feel his heart and his soul and his mind light up brighter than the moon and the stars in the dark of night- when he met you, was something else entirely, it was an instant attraction rather than a growing to like, then love and working in tandem with you was second nature to him. You were an addiction for his soul. And he couldn’t believe he was lucky enough to have you in his life. And he was adamant, that he was never, ever going to be foolish enough to try let go- ever again.

Soon enough, he noticed that your table didn’t have the usual two waiters, your table- had four. And all of them were practically drooling over you. Noah was used to only having great service at home. They were treating both you and him like royalty and he sincerely doubted he would get this kind of service if he wasn’t with you. But he was going to enjoy it and suddenly the table was full of all kinds of complementary offerings. And with you flashing that smile and remembering each waiter by name and being sweeter than sugar and honey, they were all eating out of your hands. Even the chefs and sous chefs came out to see how you liked their offerings and happily sent you away with a handsome spread of other desserts to enjoy in the room since you were quite full just from all the appetizers and tapas and entrees whether they were on the menu or not.

On the way back to the room as both of you were carrying a few bags each, you passed Alorna and Doug who were leaving the casino and arguing bitterly with each other. Apparently they both had had some really bad luck in there and you and Noah simply snickered a laugh and shook your heads at their theatrics and drama.

Once you were in the room Noah was all too happy to peel your red dress off of you so you could take your corset off and groaned in relief once your body wasn’t being restricted anymore which got Noah to chuckle as he got his own suit off.

“Feel better?” Noah asked.

“Much.” You answered before you went to the bathroom to wash all your makeup off and once you reappeared you found Noah in a simple t-shirt and a pair of night shorts as you had donned your own pajamas.

“Dessert on the balcony?” You suggested.

“Sure.” Noah nodded as he grabbed the bags as you two went out the porch as you grabbed a blanket and snuggled into the double sunchair together as you two got to digging into dessert.

“So what are your hobbies?” You asked him curiously.

“Like what?” He asked you.

“Well, bedsides the flying, when it’s the off season, what do you like to do?” You asked as Noah took a big bite of cheesecake and thought it over as he chewed. “Besides the things you have to do to live up here, what are the things you look forward to doing in your off time?” You clarified before you took a bite yourself.

“Well I guess, just...making things and improving things. Two weeks ago, my winter plans were to rewire the parts of my plane I didn’t rewire last year. And the usual home improvements. Last winter I made Sakura a new dresser, so I’m kind of a jack of all trades.” Noah answered.

“Well then I think I have something that will interest you, it’s a workshop and it’s a decent sized outbuilding. When Andy and I were designing the house, he wanted to have a space to do his tinkering, to work on the vehicles, to do some maintenance and whatever else he needed or wanted to do. So even after he died, I went ahead and built the workshop that’s bigger than a shed but not quite a pole barn. It’s big enough to do small to medium sized projects in, comfortably. Thanks to my brothers and brothers in law and my dad I was able to score a lot of various equipment for super cheap from a lot of the old estate sales and barn sales and such. Like I have a lot of woodshop equipment, mechanic stuff, forge stuff, blade-smithing stuff, blacksmithing stuff and the like. And my dad and all the men in my family, whenever they come over, I can always find them out there, fiddling with stuff. Like it could be a proper man cave. All it would need is like a couch and a tv. Because it already has a mini fridge for soda and beer along with a bathroom and washing facilities. It is a separate space from the stables, and the hay barn.” You informed him as you pulled out your phone and showed him pictures of it before he took the phone and zoomed in on some of the equipment was shown as Noah’s lips were pursed into a silent ‘ooh’.

“Why do you have a hard on?” You teased as you noticed his half hard cock make an appearance in his shorts as you stroked your leg against it from half sitting in his lap.

“Cause I’m looking at one of my biggest fantasies brought to life, in my wildest dreams I never would have imagined anything like that and my head is almost spinning with all kinds of ideas of everything I could do with all of this. It’s almost too good to be true. I mean that’s a….” Noah chuckled as he looked at it all before he started listing off what he saw and what he knew about all of it as you just smiled brighter and prouder as relief and validation and vindication flooded your mind.

“Good.” You beamed.

“Why did you build it if Andy wasn’t alive to enjoy it and use it?” Noah asked you thoughtfully.

“Can you promise me not to freak out?” You posed.

“Yeah.” Noah answered as he gave you a curious look.

“Ok, so it was one of those- ‘build it and they will come’ kind of things. I had always planned in my head that if and when Andy would die, I would just up and move to the northern Great Lakes to be with the rest of my family. And then when Andy did die and we had already bought the property and were in the process of bulldozing the existing farm house and clearing brush and trees to make room for the house. I flirted with the idea of still cutting ties and just up and moving. But Olga surprised me by coming down to see me and she advised not making any rash decision with a broken heart and not to let my past ideas limit my current potential. And she had me bring her out there. And she ended up doing a peering right then and there, among the dirt and gravel. She told me to not change my plans of moving there, that my roots where I was- were already deep enough to sustain me and my family and if I uprooted myself and my family that I would damage them and me more than help them and myself. That I had the will, the means and the ability to build my dreams right there, from start to finish and that if I built it, they would come true. I just had to lay the foundations. To grow a garden, you ready the soil and then plant. I had already started to ready the soil. What I grew from there depended on how much soil I readied and what I planted. Both literally and figuratively. And that by the time my heart was ready, everything else would be ready too. And when she shared that with my family, they were all too happy to help in any way they could. When I had full control of all the funds from all of my inheritance from my adopted grandparents- I went back to the design firm and did a complete redesign and because I now had, literal millions to play with, I was able to design my dream house with all the flourishes and thoughtful touches and dreams and fantasies I had initially wanted but gave up because they didn’t fit the utilitarian point of view Andy had and I got to plan and execute it exactly how I wanted it. And even when there were little hiccups with the construction. I was ok with it. Because I wanted it to be perfect and it was. And then after it was built, and I was furnishing it and suddenly my dad, my father in law and my brother and brothers in law drug me to all these estate sales and barn sales and I got a ton of equipment for super cheap. And Olga told me that the right man would recognize what I have and know exactly how to use it best, not just in my self but with what I had. Which you just demonstrated for me, cause you knew what all of that was and I am willing to bet that you have at least a dozen ideas of what to do and how to use it all in your head.” You grinned proudly as you tapped the side of his head affectionately.

“Oh at least a hundred.” Noah admitted happily before he turned to kiss your fingers and your palm with equal affection.

“I look forward to seeing them.” You insisted as you snuggled further together.

#Jewel Of The North #Jewel Of The North Part 11 #ice orcs #jewel orcs #ahhh #all better #but it's going to get even better

17 notes · View notes

has-gilgamesh-doneanythingwrong · 3 years

Text

Just Another Day in Fuyuki

Follows the events of Fuyuki’s 5th Holy Grail war from the perspective of an ordinary student.* (also lmao i put it on ao3 too)

*(This idea was based off a hilarious YouTube comment I read)

The first time she realized that something was rotten within the town of Fuyuki was on a cool, midnight blue night. It was a night like no other, ivory rays of moonlight dancing atop her skin as she took a casual jog past the all-too familiar gates of Homurahara Academy.

It should’ve been a normal night, yet the streets were much more silent than usual. Before she could spin to the side to cross over to the next junction; a powerful array of red lights assaulted her eyes, darting around like spirits.

‘WHAT?’ As she looked back, she saw that the red lights were emanating from none other than Homurahara Academy itself! That was strange, she had never witnessed such an event before.

‘Looks like we’ve got a case of delinquents at our place as well, huh?’ All it took was a split second for her to turn her back against the bizarre sight, regarding it as no more than a minor prank. Well of course she did. It’s not as if anything exciting happened within Fuyuki, anyway!

Little did she know that such an action may have saved her very life...

‘Good morning. Recently we’ve been sighting reports of multiple gas leaks and bloodless murders. In addition to this, there’s recently been an online trend of blurry pictures of people wearing suspicious cosplay being shared online. Many sources suggest that...’

As the local Fuyuki news blared yet more macabre news surrounding recent incidents, the young girl slipped on her wood brown loafers, as she patted down her coffee brown school jumper.

The young girl’s name was none other than Sakaki Ayane; a student of Homuhara Academy. As she jammed her plain, homemade bento filled to the brim with Strawberry Cream Sandwiches and Fried Chicken Cutlets into her extremely ordinary school bag, and switched off the plain television with a bland remote, a singular thought passed her mind.

‘It really is just another normal day in Fuyuki today!’ Sure, the news was terrifying- but hey, as long as her daily peace wasn’t disturbed, she was fine! Slamming the door to her basic house closed, she skipped through the mundane streets of her hometown, warm sunlight beaming down on her face, as she bowed politely to fellow shop-owners and neighbors.

See, her life was totally fine! There was no need to worry about the news, or that time she witnessed giant fireworks at her school, after all! Everything was definitely all-ok!

As she prowled past numerous mounds of identically-emblazoned students, and sat herself right in the middle of Fujimura Taiga’s homeroom class- students guffawing at their sensei’s top-notch sense of humor- she breathed a sigh of relief.

However once lunchtime passed, Ayane was shocked speechless by a minor change to her daily lifestyle. Just as usual, her orange-haired classmate- Emiya Shirou- had caught the entire hall’s attention, due to his lively interactions with a twin-tailed genius named Tohsaka Rin. Ayane was pretty used to their interactions by now- Emiya would bust out into an awkward show, whilst students would gasp, their faces marred with awe and jealousy. As for Rin, she knew next to nothing about the beautiful girl, except for the fact that she’d sometimes catch her mid-conversation with Emiya, using rather surreal vocabulary such as ‘holy grail’ and ‘mages’.

Thinking it was nothing much, Ayane was convinced that Emiya and Tohsaka were a bunch of Roleplayers or something. She didn’t know much about the genre, but found it to be quite fun to imagine scenarios such as being a mage fighting over holy grails, and fighting dangerous beasts- such as skeleton armies. ‘I mean, why else would they talk as if they’re in the middle of a quest?’ Taking another humongous munch out of her sandwich, shock finally settled into her pores once she noticed that something was a little off about their interactions this time.

‘Where’s Shinji?’ That greasy-seaweed-haired, smug little man’s features were very prominent in Ayane’s mind. Based on her assumptions, he was the kind of idiot who kept on trying to interrupt Emiya and Tohsaka’s Roleplay sessions- much to both their chagrins.

However, this time- he wasn’t here at all?! Where had he gone off to? ‘I guess they finally kicked him off their Roleplay club, once and for all.’ Ayane heaved a sigh at that. She had no idea why they’d accommodate such a selfish guy in the first place; seeing as he always kept on trying to centre their Roleplaying on topics concerning himself instead! ‘If I was a Roleplayer, I definitely wouldn’t want him on my squad!’ Incredulously tapping her feet against the linoleum flooring; she tried to think of various reasons as to why Shinji was kicked out of the gang.

But it was to no avail. Slamming her head against the tea brown shade of her desk, she groaned.

That was it! There was no choice but to catch the latest gossip! Packing up her lunchbox, she rushed out of the classroom like a blur of wind; leaving bemused classmates in her wake. Running as if her life depended on it, she leapt onto the school roof; caught sight of the local gossips- and pulled out a spare sandwich.

“I’ll offer you this sandwich! So, spare me the news, what’s going on with Shinji?!”

A bunch of confused girls, smack bang in the middle of a game of cards- looked up at Ayane, their faces confused.

“Shinji? Who’s Shinji again?” A girl with blonde hair and piercings shrugged her shoulders.

“You know, that rich guy? That one that has cash leaking outta his pockets.”

“Oh, that guy? Have no clue.”

“A friend of a friend of a friend dated him. Said he’s a pain in the butt to be around.”

“Yes, that’s the one!” Ayane pointed excitedly, as she plonked herself in between the girls, her body heaving with laboured breaths. “So, what happened? When did he disappear?”

“If you want details like that, you’re gonna have to offer more than a sandwich,” The blonde-haired girl whined. “You’re always asking us for gossip these days, Ayane.”

“A-ah, is that so?” Anxiously wiping sweat off her forehead, Ayane rummaged through her bag: oodles of paper; pretty rocks; textbooks and other strange materials clattering onto the stone ground. Eventually, she uncovered a small talisman from her bag, eyes gleaming with excitement. “How about this then? I’m sure this is worth quite a bit of yen!”

“Dude, my sister bought that for 500 yen the other day. No dice from me.”

“It’s pretty cute, though...I’ll take it!” As one girl happily exchanged it with Ayane, the others spun their heads in horror.

“Kikuo! You damn betrayer!”

“You can’t be human, accepting such a cheapskate offer!”

“Damn, though...I can relate. Who can resist cute things, amirite?”

As they began to squabble, Ayane laughed. Nothing beat a good gossip session!

The school day had finally ended, with only the loud cheering and yells of various school clubs filling the now empty halls of Homurahara Academy. As she pulled out her loafers from her metallic gray shoe locker; a conflicted expression crossed her face, as she recalled the events of her gossip session.

“Ah, that Shinji? Well, it was really odd, but he pissed off right after a major incident hit our school!”

“W-what happened?” Ayane was more or less right in the other girl’s face, her eyes bulging with curiosity.

“E-erm, well...” Blushing awkwardly, the girl scratches her face. “I mean, weren’t you there? It was kinda unforgettable.”

“Actually, I decided to take a day off school that day.” Ayane’s directness was like a major slap in the face for the others. “School can be really boring sometimes...”

“I had a feeling you’d say that...” Another sighed. “Well anyway, some HUGE shit happened. Like we were all sitting in class one second-”

“- and then there was this weird- ass red light-”

‘What is it with our school and red lights?’ Ayane’s gut instinct could tell that something was strange about this story. It felt unreal.

“-Yeah, and then like everything just blacked out. Like the only memory I have is of me waking up the next day or something.” The other girls nodded in assent. “It’s like some freaky curse possessed the shit out of Homurahara Academy or something!” None of them were able to fill in the missing blanks about what happened; eventually blaming it all on poison gas.

“Well, anyway; Shinji disappeared from that day onwards. Not like that’s a bad thing, mind you.” And that was it.

As Ayane exited the gates, a heavy cloud permeated her mind. Time was certainly out of joint, for them to not even be able to recall what happened! ‘Maybe Shinji was possessed by a ghost...’ Strolling by the courtyard, she caught sight of a familiar purple-haired student.

It was Matou Sakura. Because Ayane was such a nosy student, she recognised her as that one shy girl who’d label her classmate-Emiya, as her senpai. As she passed the girl, she bowed ever-so-slightly in respect, as Sakura embarrassedly bowed back. Watching after her back, yet another terrifying wash of surprise crawled across her back.

Didn’t Sakura usually meet up with that one super-glamorous, plum-haired model-like lady on her way home? It was strange to see Sakura walking home alone.

‘Shit’s really hitting the fan now...’ Ayane mused, as she turned in the opposite direction. She needed an emotional escape to purge herself of the encroaching force of dread threatening to engulf her body. ‘Ah, that’s it! Let’s go to the harbour!’ Regaining her previous sense of joy, Ayane more or less sprinted to Fuyuki Harbour. Aside from a few guests, people going fishing- and the odd seagull- it was often quiet, making it the perfect place for silent contemplation!

She more or less flew towards the harbour, breathing in a deep gulp of the fresh sea air once she arrived. The harbour was like heaven, drifting clouds trundling overhead. Pointing exuberantly at that one special lighthouse perched far away, she grinned. ‘This is the best- OH?!’

Before she could release a scream of joy, she caught sight of something.

It seemed as if she wasn’t alone at the harbour, after all. Shielding her eyes from the billowing wind, she caught sight of a rather fit man in skin-tight black pants; and a figure-hugging white shirt. But what really caught her off-guard was his bold blue locks of hair.

‘Hey, wait a minute!! Why does he remind me of those blurry pictures of people wearing suspicious cosplay?!’ Clamping a hand over her mouth, she prayed to all of the gods and deities in the world to disguise her presence. Seeing as the man was looking so intently at the sea, she didn’t want to disturb his peace time. ‘What a shame...’ One of Ayane’s favourite hobbies was to scream at the harbour, where nobody else could hear her. However, she would be cordial to this visitor today. ‘You better watch out, blue hair!’ She declared in her mind; fists clenched. ‘I’ll be considerate today, but won’t be next time! If I see you again, you’ll definitely have to put up with me screaming at the sea!!’

As she moonwalked as silently as possible away from the sparkly man, a major thought hit her mind. ‘There sure have been a lot of beautiful people with stunning hair colours hanging out in Fuyuki lately...’ It made her somewhat excited yet terrified at the same time to see just how much her daily life was changing.

Oh well, there was no choice but for her to release her pent-up emotions somewhere else instead. As a rather detailed map of Fuyuki appeared within her mind, a lightbulb popped in her brain. ‘The Fuyuki City Centre!’ Nothing was better than throwing one’s emotions at a cup of ice cream. ‘I’m a genius,’ Ayane twirled down the road, pattering rays of sun following behind. After screaming at the sky in the park (startling a few children); and buying the biggest matcha sundae that she could afford, she was all set for the day and ready to go home.

Although today had been quite suspicious, things were finally settling back to normal. Or so she thought. All peace instantly came to a halt, as she bumped into something quite long. ‘Oh crap!’ Raising her head, she came face-to-face with none other than a human wearing a... strange combination between a... biker outfit and school uniform? ‘Never seen an outfit like that before.’ As she bowed in apology, a piercing gaze reminiscent of death itself froze her body to its very core.

“The humans of this era are such pathetic mongrels...” The voice trailed off, as the harsh man’s presence all but disappeared.

‘Err...What?’ Once he was out of sight, her legs buckled; as she fell to the ground- passer-by's sparing her disgruntled glances. ‘I’ve never felt a presence that scary before...’ Clutching her heart anxiously, the shadow of death curled itself around her chest; suffocating her breath. It would take until the pitch black of night for her to regain her composure again. As she trawled back home within the dark, Ayane exhaled painfully, clutching her head.

What a weird day this had been! ‘I’m so glad I’m home now.’ Relieved, she withdrew her jangling keys from her bag; overjoyed to be right in front of her basic house again!

“Yay, I’m home-?!!!!” The ground beneath her rattled ominously, as she toppled to the ground- her eyes rattling wildly. Powerful tremors rippled around her, warping Fuyuki into the most demonic rollercoaster ride she had ever had the displeasure of experiencing.

‘WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON?!!!’ Idealistic images of the bland, mundane Fuyuki that she loved were shattering, right before her eyes. As a mere human she was blissfully unaware of the blood-curdling terrors lurking right beside her, in this cursed town...This was the fate of those unaware of the events of the Fifth Holy Grail War.

THE END

(lmao Ayane is the weirdest original character EVER. However, I do wonder what random passers-by think about all of the strange crap occurring in Fuyuki!)

#fate series #fate stay night #my writing #gilgablog #original character #LMAOOO this ended up being much funnier than expected daymn...#meh i put it on ao3 too

1 note · View note

tsukihoshino · 5 years

Text

So now that it's like in my head, I'm just saying that the worst thing to happen to Sakura isn't that she didnt get the same BS power ups that don't even make any sense by the end of the series like Sasuke and Naruto--there is nothing good about the whole "oh look we're actually reincarnations of these god like beings and we're basically atomic bombs and no one can stop us until our shitty next gen sequal that makes even less sense."

There is nothing wrong with Sakura's skill set, only that she never gets a chance to use it besides fighting Sasori and the war arc (which dont even get me started on how monumentally dumb it was to structure it the way that they did...like on what planet do you put all close ranged fighters in one group and have a surprise attack division? And this is not just me being bitter about no Sasori/Sakura reunion. Ok? Everyone with a brain knows groups should be created with support, long and short range fighters. its RPG 101 ffs.) where she's mostly doing her job of you know, making sure people dont die.

I do not understand this mindset of "real badasses just go around killing and kicking ass." Strength is not just measured in kill counts and damage given. SAKURA IS NOT JUST HER FISTS. Ok I get it, we all want to see her kick ass and it is phenomenal when she gets to but can we just consider how valuable the other side of what she does is? She makes it so that people who otherwise wouldn't live, DO live. She can jerk people back from the gates of death AND put them there. She is a double sided coin when all Sasuke and Naruto can do is devastate people. Killing people is easy, hurting people is easy. Putting people back together is not. If it was everyone in Naruto could do it.

What IS the absolute worst thing that was done to Sakura was not allowing her to move on from Sasuke, or even giving the audience credible reasons for them to be together other than the fact that Sasuke needed someone to have offspring with for the sequal and it might as well have been her. Sakura is an after thought even in her marriage, it's not about her even then--does she seem like the type of person who would have enjoyed being a single parent prior to the massive jump 700 took? This is the girl whose favorite phrase was "A life with love throughout."

What it speaks to is a complete lack of respect to her as a character.

693 has Sasuke outright saying there is no reason for her to love him nor for him to love him, and its 100% true but we're just supposed to accept that somewhere, somehow they ended up together and that Sakura once again allows herself to just be strung along.

I am so sick to death of "sakura is such a good girl for being so devoted and forgiving to someone who pretty much never showed her any interest, treated her and the people she loves like garbage." Its. Not. Romantic. It's sad. Sasuke is absent from her life for what, 70% of the story? What the fuck causes as 10 year old girl to fall in love with someone and remain in love with them when they periodically try to maim her or emotionally drop kick her repeatedly?

The worst thing that kishimoto did to Sakura wasnt the lack of fights or asspull powers, it was to make Sakura's self esteem so low she'd settle for someone like Sasuke.

It might be canon but it's really shitty.

Sarada looks nothing like her, Sasuke is absent because "he can't handle a strong woman like Sakura" according to the word of god...they didn't even have an actual picture together. Sakura and Naruto pretty much don't even hang out and dont know very basic facts about one another like wtf.

And another thing:

Sarada needs glasses, not just so that we could have a contrived arc about her questioning whether Sakura is her mother or not, and making the reader think that Sakura may infact NOT be her mom but that its Karin--but because the in story explanation is that The-medic-who-surpased-Tsunade couldn't deal with a fucking fever.

She essentially got erased and what we're left with is just someone who bares a vague resemblance of Sakura.

I'll wait for someone to get mad about the bolded.

#sakura haruno #naruto #antisasusaku #the end will always be garbage #support based characters are fucking important #i main a healer in every mmorpg i ever played ok.#there is a reason why i am riding the sasosaku train to hell.

39 notes · View notes

keepyourpantsongohan · 6 years

Text

Ayesha Liveblogs Naruto Shippuden S20 (Pt. 3)

I wonder if going after Karin’s Tsukuyomi bulb was happenstance or whether Tobirama went “I smell an Uzumaki” and had at it

“Just be quiet for a bit” How dare you speak to your father this way Sasuke, Kakashi does nothing but love you

“EVERYONE WILL OWN A DOG. GO GET A DOG, HOKAGE’S DECREE!“ you’ve got my vote, Kiba

Mirai as a baby is an absolute unit and I love it

Shikamaru, getting down on one knee in front of Temari: Will you not marry me?

You know what. All these dreams are extremely realistic. I buy it. A teenage boy would totally dream about kicking his friends’ asses for fun even if he had the opportunity to do anything in the world. 10/10 believability

Sai dreams about being told he has a nice smile and being twirled around by Naruto my boooooy 😭😭😭😭😭😭

“[My Sasori transformer] will be the guardian deity of the Sand” Kankuro pls

Omg Temari’s dream is so cute she wants her little brothers to need her

God the fact Gaara’s dream is about having a happy childhood PICK UP THE PHONE RASA I JUST NEED TO TALK

“Madara, don’t you dare talk about the Uchiha. The only one who has that right, is my big brother.” But he did... murder them, Sasuke. That is a thing that happened. My dear. My dude. He done did it.

Having read Itachi Shinden none of this should be shocking but FUGAKU REALLY YOUR SON IS FOUR WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS

“Listen Itachi, never forget this sight” well he sure won’t now that you’ve given him CHILD PTSD FUGAKU

“We finally have peace, and we must do our best to maintain it” Hmmm.... must you, Fugaku? Is that a thing you must do?

“What is life, anyway?” Damn my existential dread didn’t kick in at least until I was in school, Itachi

Sasuke was such a weird-looking newborn I love him

I wonder how the English dub will deal with the mild implications of inc/est between Itachi and Izumi

Please Mikoto your son is like 6 why are you having him babysit

God I am so used to every version of Itachi having the voice of a grownass man that hearing a child-like voice even when he is 6 is almost off-putting lmao

Full offence Obito but why do you have to be such a little bitch

“Oh good, I knew that you’d be alright” HE’S 6 FUGAKU

Why is Naruto just sitting in a basket on top of his father’s grave??? Who let you do this? Hiruzen what is wrong with you??

“I’m glad that you didn’t die” an accurate representation of Itachi’s social skills at all ages

DFhsdjfhkdsjhfk I love that Itachi has accidentally become these kids’ leader

AHHHHH I guess that’s Hana next to Itachi I wanna see the cat ninja and dog ninja fight

“If the fighting can be stopped, I’d like to stop it” Shisui <3

Itachi’s sweet tooth is so goddamn cute ahhhh what a little nerd

Hhgfkhjfhl SASUKE’S PAW ENCYCLOPEDIA THE PREQUEL THIS IS WHAT I NEVER KNEW I NEEDED

“I mean, [ladies] are clueless” “How dare you insult my woman” Turns out the alcohol this cat was drinking was Respect Women Juice

God I love Minazuki-sensei he’s such a mess

“No they blew away in the wind” guess Itachi hasn’t picked up his snitching tendencies yet lmao

Baby Sasuke has acquired a younger voice too I guess. It is real late in the game to be establishing these lmao

Obito. I’m. Stop???? Please. Is this how Kakashi felt during the war

God I love Shisui the tiny ninja detective they really have left off some of the cooler aspects of being a shinobi in all the wild and flashy jutsu like during the Land of Waves arc when Kakashi kept noticing relatively mundane clues

“Shisui picked up on how I felt right from the beginning” welcome to empathy Itachi

“I’ll hand this intel over to Lord Hokage, and he will deliver a just and fair judgment” I like this ANBU vs. ROOT dichotomy but bold of you to assume Hiruzen won’t ultimately let Danzo do whatever he wants lol

Damn what the shit how does Shisui know who the foundation already isn’t he like 12

The animation of this arc is nice but also so weird they really did make Itachi and Shisui’s eyes like half of their face

These wholeass adults getting between by two prepubescents lmao

“A teleportation jutsu has no mass” wait WHAT I have so many questions Shisui what does that MEAN

“I want to you to think of me as your older brother” HELL YEAH HE DOES

Ffgdfkghkjh what an abrupt voice change between age 8 and 11 Itachi

How many times have they animated these same goddamn Itachi scenes

Holy shit it’s like they tried to tell the story of the Itachi Shinden novels and then got bored halfway through gfkhgfkhgkjh

“I’m exhaAAAUsted from my mission” Itachi pls why say it like that

“You have the Mangekyo as well?” Fugaku had a friend???? Unrealistic. Blocked

THEY KIDNAPPED NARUTO??? I DON’T REMEMBER THIS IN ITACHI SHINDEN

Genjutsu but I don’t remember that either ?!?!?! Doesn’t Fugaku spend all of Itachi Shinden being emotionally distant and sending Itachi mixed moral messages

Who is the Fugaku hater on this storyboard staff lmao I’m crying

I have a lot of thoughts about this art direction honestly why is everything in the shadows why are the character models so weird why is Itachi suddenly outside in the lightning for his murder discussion meeting instead of inside the council room if you had to shout over lightning people could hear you

“I challenge you to the high jump” “You’re no match for me” Sasuke you’re the most obnoxious seven-year-old in the world I love it

“There’s something that I’d like you to help me with” a very casual opener when you’re proposing the murder of your entire clan but okay

They really leaned into the horror movie aesthetic huh fair enough

I have some objections to register about Izumi’s death like both options are weird but at least in Itachi Shinden she wasn’t humiliated by Obito begging for Itachi to save her she had a degree of awareness and it was an impactful if strange scene

FUCK THE TOBI VOICE I KNEW IT WAS COMING BUT I’M WHEEZING

Cute new ED but also the idea of Tobirama giving anyone a fistbump amuses me immensely

“Who would’ve thought that that scuzzy bearded jerk would’ve been able to use a taijutsu like that” RUDE but also ‘scuzzy’ jhfjghkjhfgj

Omg that’s so funny they literally gave the former owner of Zabuza’s blade the same voice

This doesn’t make any fucking sense how could Juzo have the executioner’s blade when Zabuza would be like 21 when Itachi was 13 oh my god

“The Hidden Mist doesn’t keep any prisoners” unsurprising but interesting

Is this meant to imply that Juzo is killed and then Zabuza immediately finds the sword and starts a coup because that’s hilarious

Wait how does them fighting the Mizukage make any sense isn’t Yagura under Obito’s control lmao who wrote this

Did Itachi just.... accidentally cripple the Mizukage omg [Zabuza screams in the distance]

Hahahaha I know it’s supposed to be evil but it’s really funny that Kakuzu killed his partner for being too slow

“I wouldn’t know how to cater to your moods” kjfhgkdhfgjh Kakuzu just got wrecked by a thirteen-year-old LMAO

“I’m not sure what to do with you... whether to kill you right now or find a way to use you” KILL OROCHIMARU, ITACHI, IT’S GONNA SAVE YOU A LOT OF TROUBLE

Why the hell would Kabuto be hanging out near the Akatsuki anyway isn’t he in a long term infiltration of the Leaf Village lmao or can Orochimaru summon him like a snake

On what basis does Pain decide these partnerships did Kisame and Sasori take a babysitting course or smth

The cutaway without the “This... is art” scene is almost funnier because it implies Itachi just had to flash his eyes at Deidara and Deidara was like, “HELLO AKATSUKI I AM HERE”

“I wouldn’t mind giving you a taste of my art” [insert ninja sex joke about Deidara’s mouth hands here]

Deidara really should not be old enough to be here by this point in the narrative but this entire arc has been wacky timeline wise

Man it must be fucked up to fight a puppet version of your own corpse

“What I really wanted... was to get a hold of Itachi’s body” you are the definition of stranger danger Orochimaru

From what I remember the video games had Kakuzu and Orochimaru approaching Hidan and not Konan and Itachi but I’m game for any Orochimaru erasure lmao

I’m pretty sure all of that blood was Hidan’s?? World-building whomst

“He licked Kakuzu’s blood” did he though?? Show me his wound Itachi

OMG they’re really heavy-handed with Leaf!Itachi as if we did not just watch a bunch of episodes of Itachi caring about his village like honestly look at this:

Kisame: So even you have feelings for your birthplace, is that it?

Itachi: No. Not at all. [Sasuke, I hope that you’re safe.]

(Me too Itachi 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭)

“It’s been a long time... Saaasuke” could you say his name a little less weirdly please Itachi

You really can’t get mad at Kakashi for teaching Sasuke chidori Itachi like maybe if you would murder less people Kakashi would feel a little less overprotective

God was the only point of animating and voicing these scenes again so that Itachi could mentally apologize every twelve seconds? You know what fair enough, anxiety and depression be like that sometimes

“You still have people who’ll protect you” Oh plot twist Itachi was actually writing a “Nice” list instead of a “Naughty” list and Kakashi, Jiraiya and Naruto are all on it

Oh yeah I kind of forgot that this was all supposed to be like a 5 minute span for Sasuke’s flashback of Itachi’s entire life lmao

You know.... it’s real unclear to me how Obito wakes up from his trance lmao he may not be in a cocoon but he’s certainly exposed to the light

“Be careful. We’re surrounded on all sides by four of his shadows” “Yeah I know that” Yeah, Naruto knows it, but Sasuke’s warning where the Shadow Madaras are entirely for Kakashi and Sakura’s benefit BC HE WORRIES MY BABY BOYYYY

“This chakra is even way stronger than Ten-Tails” I really heard “Tenten” there and I was like, wait what did I miss with Tenten kfhkjhgkjhg

OH GOOD ANOTHER UCHIHA FLESH MOUNTAIN JUST WHAT WE NEEDED

“They’re turned into White Zetsu” I hate this nonsensical bit of world-building it made more sense and felt less weird when they were Hashirama clones like what the fuck

Oh I can’t believe this is making me feel almost bad for Madara did Zetsu really edit the Uchiha Stone Tablet’s Tsukuyomi section to say “Peace Plans” ain’t that how like the CIA entraps people

“Hashirama... where did I go wrong” We’d need a lot more time than you have to unpack that Madara

“Countless nights passed” I mean. Was it countless nights. Because I think it was. A couple hours. This war arc spans like two days. I have spent more human hours on this arc than they’ve spent ninja hours in this war

“I can’t believe such a person existed” neither can I Sasuke it’s almost like she was invented specifically for this arc

For real Obito no offence but like why aren’t you dead it just doesn’t make much sense khkjfdhkjhgkjh

Hmmm not 2 be that gal but Kaguya’s voice is v pleasant on the ears

“Sorry to be so rough with you, Obito” Kakashi. You loving, kind, dumb bitch. He stabbed you THREE TIMES in the past two days you really owe him like -1000 apologies

“This is also one of those times where your body just moves on its own” SASUKE CALLED OUT FOR LOVING HIS COMRADES

“I’ve got to get to Naruto” I love your dedication Minato but I feel as though the loss of both of your arms makes helping more difficult

Kakashi is not NEARLY as surprised about this levitation thing as he should be. I think as this point he’s just like. ‘This might as well happen’

All other things aside Kaguya’s really fun to look at damn

Okay okay okay not to look for too much logic in this ninja show but don’t both Naruto and Sasuke have Six Paths chakra why can only Naruto float is a metaphor for Sasuke’s fall from grace

“I am Kaguya’s child” I can only imagine a Game of Thrones-eque shadow flying out the hooha situation

“Just before the seal took hold, she gave birth to me, in order that she could be restored” I can only assume Kaguya fucked Bitterness and Regret and you know.... fair enough

I gotta tell you Zetsu being the primary narrator of this arc is jarring

Tenji seems kinda nice it’s a shame something terrible will probably happen to him

Say what you will about SP’s animation inconsistencies they can animate some beautiful-ass skies

“Is there anything that you desire” Get u a man like Tenji

Fellas is it gay to sit under the stars with your handmaiden who adores you in comfortable silence

“Even now you’re not scared. That just makes me like you more” take a shot every time a man is Like That (bah dum tss)

“Do Not Touch Me,” wow Kaguya mood

I will clarify I said that BEFORE she exploded the men gkhkjfhgkhh

Tenji, that Aino lady is your subordinate are you really gonna leave her with the creepy That man u are not the man I thought you were

“Just tell him, and I’m sure that Lord Tenji will forgive you” to be fair Aino you could’ve elaborated u were just like ‘yup she killed them’ and left it at that

WOW I RESCIND ALL COMPLIMENTS TO TENJI CALM DOWN DUDE

When life gives u lemons use people as fertilizer for ur infinite lemon tree I guess

Are you telling me 1) Gamamaru has existed since the DAWN OF CHAKRA and 2) He knew all about this Tsukuyomi shit just like. Kept it on the DL. WHAT KINDA WORLD-BUILDING

Okay but for real did the Otsutsuki clan stem like.... all the clans, because there’s the Kaguya clan (through Hamura I guess?), and the Hyuga clan definitely through Hamura, and then the Senju, Uchiha, and Uzumaki through Hagoromo like just how many people did your kids sleep with and for that matter how long ago was this

“A real talking toad! Think people would like it if we caught it and took it home?” Why are Hagoromo and Hamura the cutest things in the world this is the sibling content we deserve

“You’re just a snake oil salesman, and not a very good one” oh I think I love Hamura oh no I would love a character who gets stuck on the moon

Take a shot every time a woman exists to die and make a man sad

“She fell in love with the ruler of this land and in time she became pregnant with the two of you” notice that at no point does Gamamaru say they got married can u believe Kaguya invented premarital sex

You know none of this goes against mine and Sloane’s Kagumo theory

“How can you see so far into a toad’s heart that clearly” Gamamaru and Hagoromo’s interactions are killing me

How much time has passed for Hamura’s hair to grow that long

Hamura @ Kaguya: BROTHERS BEFORE MOTHERS

HOW MUCH TIME HAS PASSED FOR HAGOROMO TO DEVELOP THIS BROW RIDGE SAGE LAND TAKES A TOLL

Tenji doesn’t even appear in this flashback about love and betrayal it’s just Kaguya being bitter bc her gal Aino died they were in lesbians together

Every so often I’m reminded that Kishimoto has a twin brother and I wonder what he thinks about making the twins fight

“You enabled me to awaken the mangekyo sharingan and rinnegan” how do u even have words for those things. Didn’t they just happen right this moment

Wow this is all very Little Shop of Horrors, Momma feeds the tree with people juice and in turn it wants to protect her from harm

“I split the Ten Tails into nine souls” SOULS? HAGOROMO CAN... JUST MAKE SOULS. COULD HE POINT AT GAMAMARU AND SAY “YOU ARE TWO FROGS NOW” AND THAT’D JUST BE TRUE?

“We won’t be that far apart,” said Hagoromo, just as his brother was about to teleport to the moon

Side note: Maybe ur crops were failing bc without the moon the tides are all out of whack and you know, the moon was apparently just invented right now

“Time passed, and so did Hagoromo” I love this particular literary device

“Time after time I’d approach the reincarnates of Indra and Ashura” okay so we’re supposed to be down for not only regular reincarnation in Naruto but Indra and Ashura ONLY BEING BORN TO THE SENJU AND UCHIHA CLANS REPEATEDLY WHAT WHO WROTE THIS

Does this mean that people Naruto and Sasuke every 50 years????You’d think the Land of Fire would just. Get used to it

“Just with that alone, a thousands years passed” well at least we have some idea of how much time it’s been since Kaguya era lmao

Ur telling me that this horseshit happened bc Tobirama doesn’t know to leave dead bodies well enough alone

SHHHHH I PREFER THE ZETSU BEING WEIRD HASHIRAMA CLONES

This montage of Zetsu taking credit for everything Madara and Obito did is not appreciated lmao take some responsibility for your actions!!!!

I’m gonna keep harping on this for the rest of the war honestly like where is the ACCOUNTABILITY

“So your teen rebellion continues” LMAO UR NOT WRONG

“I know that this could be our last hurrah, but we gotta give it our best shot” not much of a plan Naruto sweetheart but fair

Tag urself I’m Kakashi’s look of despair at his hormonal students

“And Sasuke? Sorry that my sexy jutsu didn’t work” I was not prepared for the sincerity with which that line was delivered

The Sad Old Man™ energy radiating off Obito is... Immense

“We’re all ready to die” R U THINKING OF RIN BC SHE WAS READY TO DIE OR BC UR READY TO SEE HER EITHER WAY IT’S SAD KAKASHI

“I want to thank you for helping me out. And for helping Sasuke” “No, there’s no need to thank me” this is the first time Obito has been right about something since the age of 13

“I’m not going to waste time on speeches,” said Obito, in the middle of a dramatic speech

Minato..... how did you chop the branch.... with no hands to pick up a kunai???????? What kind of yoga contortion was involved

What I imagine the subtext of this scene to be:

Hagoromo: New old son!!!! I am dad now

Hashirama, whose dad was Butsuma: [choking back tears] Okay

Tobirama: I also hate our father

They’re all taking to this “demi-god pops out of the bottom half of dead ex-comrade” thing pretty well but to be fair they’ve had a complicated day

#ayesha liveblogs nahruto shipduden #liveblogging #ayesha talks anime #naruto series #long post #cutting it off here bc it got long #free meee eng dub

38 notes · View notes

narhinafan · 6 years

Text

Naruto Positive and Negative Point Event - Vol 5

Vol 5 is here and guess what all the Konoha 12 kunoichi are finally accounted for. However this also means I have lots and lots of panels to sort through. and writing this post is going to take forever.

Rules are here, previous Vol here

Sakura Haruno

-1 Insulting Lee

-1 Insulting Lee twice

-1 Falling back and hitting her head on the floor dodging hearts of all things.

-1 More insults

-1 Saying she could have died

-1 Bumps on her head.

+1 Recognising Lee is stronger then he looks

-1 Not carrying about Naruto getting hurt at all

+1 Reminding Sasuke they don’t have time

+1 Shouting at Sasuke when he goes off anyway

+1 Trying to stop Sasuke

+1 Being worried when Sasuke is kicked in the face

+1 Question what happend despite clearly seeing that Sasuke blocked the hit

-1 Fangirl moment

-1 Referred to Lee with an insult

-1 Insulting Lee again and saying he can’t beat Sasuke

+1 Remembering the explanation on the sharingan

-1 Being confused when Sasuke still gets his ass handed to him

-1 Shouting Sasuke for like the fourth time with no point to it.

+1 Going to help Sasuke when he is falling

+1 Catching Sasuke

+1 Seeing if Sasuke is alright

+1 Noticing Sasuke is trembling and can’t defend himself

-1 Telling Naruto not to ask stupid questions just cause he wants to know what is happening

-1 Being grossed out at guy

-1 Calling Naruto an idiot

-1 Being freaked when Gai looks at them

-1 Shouting at Naruto when he says Sasuke isn’t that great

-1 Telling Naruto to shut up when he was making a point and telling them what he figured out that no one else did

-1 Kakashi stating that one word from Sasuke and Sakura would have come along

+1 Asking what would happen if they showed up without her

-1 Being scared of the competition

-1 Shouting and insulting Ino right off the bat

-1 Starting a fight

-1 Being jealous of Ino

-1 Shouting at another team

+1 Noticing this wasn’t Kabuto’s first time

+1 Asking him what they can expect

+1 Getting what Kabuto is getting at

-1 Being nervous after hearing it

-1 Calling Naruto a butthead

-1 Calling themselves beginners

+1 Being worried for Naruto

+1 Going to cheer Naruto up

-1 Calling Naruto stupid despite her earlier worry

-1 Strangling Naruto

-1 Doing it in front of the enemy

-1 Telling everyone to pay no attention to him making them look bad

-1 Calling Naruto a special ed ninja

+1 Being worried for Kabuto

+1 Going to see if he is alright

+1 Trying to help him

-1 Slaming her head after she hears the rules

-1 Asking a question when the instructor said not to

-1 Asking herself what reasons when it is a test

+1 Thinking about how they can pass

-1 Having no confidence in Naruto

-1 Shouting out loud when she hears the part about disqualification

-1 Being worried

-1 No confidence in her teammate

+1 Focusing on her own work

+1 Planning to make up for Naruto

+1 Understanding the question

+1 Realising Naruto can’t solve the questions like this and neither can most people

-1 Inner self being over confident despite outer self worry

+1 Realising that only certain number of people will pass

+1 Noticing the exam wants to force them to cheat

-1 Question if Naruto is stupid or not

-1 Not realising that cheating is supposed to be how they pass the test

+1 Answered all the questions

+1 Even her classmates agree she is smart

-1 Being scared after hearing the final question

+1 Sure she can answer the final question

+1 Being worried for Naruto

+1 Going to quite for Naruto

-1 Going get both her and her team kicked out without considering their feelings on the matter

-1 Calling Naruto and idiot

+1 Being happy that Naruto has guts

-1 Calling Naruto full of it when she was going to quite not moments earlier

-1 Being annyoned at the new officer

-1 Relating her to Naruto

-1 Being scared by the forest

-1 Calling the proctor a nutcase

-1 Not caring that Naruto was injured

+1 Noticing that at least half the teams will fail

-1 Being annyoned at Naruto’s antics

End of Sakura’s Vol 5 moments

Current total -134

Vol 5 Points 52 negative points, 33 Positive points, total score for vol 5 = 19

New total = -153

Well Sakura is doing better in this vol she actually cared more about Naruto then she did before though she still in the habit of insulting or shouting at him. Unfortunately she still treats anyone with Sasuke with disrespect even those who are her superiors, but one of the best things this vol was that Sakura actually talked back to Sasuke for once.

Ino Yamanaka

-1 Being a Sasuke fangirl

-1 Latching on Sasuke from behind

+1 Said hello to Sakura when she insulted her

-1 Insulted Sakura back

-1 Still holding on to Sasuke

-1 Going bleach at Sakura

-1 Saying she is going to make Sasuke her’s

-1 Sticking her tongue out at Sakura

+1 Is Sakura rival

-1 Is a Sasuke groupie

-1 Being rude to another Konoha ninja

-1 Shouting to Sakura about what Naruto did

+1 Was waiting for Sakura to finish to make her move

+1 Respects Sakura brains

-1 Saying she should feel honoured

+Targeting Sakura with her jutsu

-1 Taunts Sakura with a fake apology

+1 A good jutsu

+1 Realising the test is supposed to be done by cheating

+1 Memorised the answers

+1 Sharing the answers with her teammates

-1 Being worried about being in the forest for five days

End of Ino’s Vol 5 moments

Vol 5 Points 13 negative points, 9 Positive points, total score for vol 5 = -21

New total = -4

Ino did pretty well, but her rivalry with Sakura and obsession with Sasuke bright her down. But she has proved herself a good ninja realising the goal of the first test and helped her team get through it.

Hinata Hyuga

+1 Apologised to Naruto for Kiba words

-1 Fidgeting with her fingers

-1 Naruto describing her as a freak

-1 Won’t look Naruto in the eye

-1 Feeling outclassed by everyone else

+1 Telling Naruto to do our best

+1 Saying it despite being on different teams

+1 Worried for Naruto

+1 Willing to let Naruto cheat off her

+1 One of the first people if not the first person to finish

+1 Wanting to help Naruto pass

+1 Wanting Naruto to look at her answers

+1 Naruto saying Hinata isn’t the kind of girl to trick him

-1 Fidgeting and stuttering

+1 She doesn’t want Naruto leave

-1 Not being able to tell her true feelings

+1 Saying it would be better if they stuck together

+1 Worried for Naruto when he refuses her help

+1 Apologising for bothering Naruto

+1 Worried for Naruto when the rules for final question are given

+1 Finds Naruto attitude endearing

+1 Happy Naruto passed

+1 Worried when Naruto is hurt

End of Hinata’s Vol 5 moments

Vol 5 Points 6 negative points, 17 Positive points, total score for vol 4 = 11

New total = 11

I knew there was a reason why I love Hinata so much even when she first came she was always nice and trying to help Naruto, worrying about him even though he wasn’t on her team. The only negative points she got were for stuttering and fidgeting which I personally find kind of cute, but to most people those kind of traits would be seen as negative. Plus how Naruto first described her, but Hinata is just a character full of kindness. Also considering how right after it showed everyone else getting started Hinata already completed the test so she pretty much would have did it without cheating. Thought I can’t say that for sure since we aren’t give a measure of time between the two events.

Tenten

+1 Set up mirrors for cheating on the ceiling

+1 Figured out the purpose of the test

+1 Helping Lee get the questions

+1 signalling to Lee what to do

End of Tenten’s Vol 5 moments

Current total = 2

Vol 5 points 0 negative points, 4 Positive points, total score for vol 5 = 4

New total = 6

Wow Tenten is the first girl to nothing but positive points and despite having the less number of panels it quite high on the point scale. It’s too bad if she was shown more she would be raking the points she is true ninja and has quit a good set of skills

Well that is it for this vol it only took me almost 2 hours to do. If it keeps up at this rate I may have to split the posts up by girl as well as vol. Though it was mostly just Sakura having so many panels over everyone else.

#Naruto Positive and Negative Point Event #anti sakura haruno #hinata hyuga #ino yamanaka #tenten

18 notes · View notes

therealeagal · 6 years

Text

Boruto - episode 66

And so our triumphant heroes return. They gave the bad guy what for and didn't afraid of anything. Unfortunately, they didn't leave Naruto behind but no one's perfect.

Hinata and Himawari, for some inexplicable reason, are glad that Naruto returned.

Sarada and Sakura are glad Sasuke has returned and Kankuro and Araya are glad that Gaara has returned.

That douchebag Shinki meanwhile isn't even paying attention to his father, but is instead focusing on Boruto.

Boruto's pretty cool guy and all, but if my father had just risked his life to help save the world, I would be focusing on him, not Boruto. Yet another mark in the “Shinki is a douchebag” column.

Anyway, then some exposition about reconstruction and Naruto going back to neglecting his family.

Then intro music.

Then cut to Boruto for some reason apologizing to Shinki, even though A: Shinki is a douchebag and B: Boruto did nothing wrong.

Then Shinki turns around and walks away without saying anything. Have I mentioned what a douchebag he is yet? Stab him in the throat, Boruto.

The only person who deserves an apology is Shikadai. Even though Boruto didn't do anything other than what he's been taught to do by using the ninja tool, he still hurt Shikadai's feelings and that's definitely worth an apology.

Anyway, then Sarada and Mitsuki show up so Sarada and Boruto can argue a bit.

Then Sasuke, Naruto and Shikamaru are talking about plot things and Sasuke's leaving again and Naruto's like, "Shouldn't you stay and rest and spent more time with your family."

Words do not exist to describe the unfathomable amount of gall it takes for Naruto to lecture someone else on spending time with their family. Fuck you, Naruto.

Anyway, then Sasuke's all like "You're in no position to talk, you piece of shit." and bails.

Then more exposition and wondering what to do about Katasuke and the scientific ninja tool, which is literally the easiest decision in the world to make. Mass produce them and arm the Leaf ninjas with them. Their usefulness has already been well established (against anyone other than Momoshiki anyway).

Then cut to that one place where the ninjas take ninja jobs and Team 7 is hanging out with...that other team. With Denki, Metal and Iwabee.

Everyone's been super busy since the Chunin exams.

Then the Ino-Shika-Cho shows up and Shikadai is complaining about having to do so much work.

Then Boruto and Shikadai ride home on top of the train together and try to avoid talking to eachother even though they clearly want to. Then Boruto is about to apologize but for some reason Shikadai does it first. Boruto doesn't know why either.

He told Boruto he'd hear him out but he's been so busy that he made Boruto wait. Why that's apology-worthy is beyond me, and Boruto agrees.

Then they start arguing over who's apologizing.

Then they start laughing over their shared foolishness.

Then they talking about how strong the Kages are and Boruto's like, "I'm definitely going to be a stronger ninja than that asshole who calls himself my father".

Then Shikadai's like, "Do you remember everyone from the Chunin Exams?"

And Boruto's like, "There was that douchebag Shinki and also a bunch of unimportant randos."

And Shikadai's like, "We're going to be ninjas on our own terms and not let my awesome dad and your shitty dad affect how we do things."

Cut to the train station where Gaara and Kankuro and the Sand kids are getting on the train.

And Shinki's thinking about stuff and Gaara's like, "What's wrong, you piece of shit?"

Then Shinki starts talking shit about Boruto being a trivial low-level ninja. Seriously, someone slap this kid. He's mad because Boruto had the courage to charge headfirst into danger while he, Shinki, hung back like a little wuss.

Then Boruto runs across Sasuke whilst traversing the village rooftops and they talk about that bit when Momoshiki died and he was talking to Boruto in the alternate mind realm or whatever. Apparently Sasuke saw it because of his Rinnegan.

Then Boruto tries to give back Sasuke's old Leaf headband with a scratch on it that he borrowed when he went to fight Momoshiki but Sasuke's like "Hang onto it. It's proof that you're my student."

Then Boruto leaves and Sarada shows up and Sarada gets the Sauce to help her practice the Fireball jutsu.

The cut to some big ass tree somewhere. Mitsuki is talking to Orochimaru, who is lecturing him on almost using the Sage mode because the Leaf are plebs and would freak out or something. But Mitsuki's like, "I don't care. What's worse is the light of the sun disappearing." (this is in reference to Boruto, whom Mitsuki often refers to as his sun for some reason or other).

And then Orochimaru is like, "Unlike Naruto, I'm a good parent, so I'll support your decisions."

Then cut to the next day and Boruto is on tv doing an interview, but it was a recording because he's actually hanging out with Sarada and Mitsuki.

And Sarada's like, "I'm surprised you didn't drag down my dad and the Kages when they fought Momoshiki." and Boruto's like, "I'm just awesome like that."

Then Sarada's like, "Do you wanna be the Hokage?"

And Boruto's like, "Screw that, you can be Hokage. I'll be your kick ass (if unnecessary because you're also kick ass) bodyguard."

Then Sarada and Mitsuki bail.

Oh yeah, I forgot about that. It seems like when Momoshiki was talking to Boruto that one time he left some kind of mark or seal on Boruto's hand or something. No idea what it's all about though.

Then cut to later that evening and Boruto is returning home and Naruto, for once in his life, is actually home too. Although it's probably just a shadow clone because he couldn't be bothered to go home in person.

Seems like he brought a cake home to make up for Boruto and Himawari's birthdays that he respectively missed and ruined. Then Boruto punches him in the stomach to test whether he's a Shadow Clone, which he isn't, surprisingly. I don't understand the type of thing that is happening here. Have I crossed into some sort of parallel universe where Naruto isn't the shittiest possible father in the Naruto universe?

Then cut to the next day and Naruto and Boruto are both late and Boruto's like "Being Hokage was my dad's story. My story starts now." Even though it actually started like 66 episodes ago.

And that's the end of the episode. I haven't been reading the manga so we're in uncharted territory now, boys and girls. Here be dragons.

What perils await our young heroes?!?!? We’ll find out together!

#boruto naruto next generations #hinata uzumaki #himawari uzumaki #naruto uzumaki #sarada uchiha #sakura uchiha #sasuke uchiha #kankuro #gaara #shinki #boruto uzumaki #shikadai nara #mitsuki #momoshiki otsutsuki #orochimaru

25 notes · View notes

penkukatana · 3 years

Text

Pilot : A New Journey

Just a normal day at the academy, students were enjoying their recess to the fullest, embracing a loud and joyous atmosphere inside the voluminous dining hall. The Royal Academy of Magic and Science, also known as RAMS, is the one and only educational institute established in Oneiric Kingdom, where all the talented young prodigy of respective tribes were gathered under one roof to be equipped with all the essential knowledge and skill to later become the future leaders and warriors of the kingdom.

"Bong!"

The distinct sound of the old bell echoed across every corner of the iconic academic buildings, marking the end of the one-hour recess period given to the students. Gradually, the hall began to lose its noisy ambience as students had already finished their meal and slowly making their way out of the dining hall to continue the second half of their lesson schedule.

However, positioned at the very front row of the dining hall, a group of six female students still hadn’t move an inch from their position, not showing any sign of a rush in doing so as they kept goofing around with each other while munching on their meals.

Sakura : Oi Yena-ssi, can you speed up and finish your meal? It's time already!

Yena : Haha chill out, unnie. What's the rush for? It's not like the teachers gonna be on time anyway.

Sakura : Huh~ I know, but I got Combat class after this. You know what Sir Junho will do to the last person that enter his class, right?

The pure agitation on Sakura’s face sent Yena stifling into laughter.

Yena : Ahh, so that's why you’re freaking out right now. But... if you come to think of it, isn't it a good thing if you get to pair with him for the class? I mean, you get to experience getting your ass kicked by the great Sir Junho, the greatest ex-combatants of IZ-Land. And of course, learn from him at the same time.

Eunbi : But maybe less learning and more pain instead.

Minju : For real, though. Last time I had to pair with him for Combat class, I returned to dorm that day with bruises all over my back. I couldn't even sleep straight that night because of it.

Yujin : Haha seriously, unnie? I mean... no offense, but it's getting hard to trust your story these days since you always exaggerate. Even if I lightly tap your shoulder right now, you’ll say that I almost kill you, right?

The whole table burst into laughter from Yujin's honest comment, making the milky white face of the ice princess turned as red as the lipstick she wore on her lips.

“Don't you have class after this, Nako? You usually leave for class early since you need the front seat every time,” asked Eunbi jokingly.

“Ahh~ unnie! I told you not to mention about the front seat thing again. I'm much taller now compared to last year," said Nako while pouting her mouth. "And to answer your question, no, my Potions class was cancelled. Professor Yang have a meeting today.

"Ooh ooh, same goes for me. Both my History and Economics class after this were cancelled last minute because the professors are absent. I heard the other students said that they went for a meeting or something," added Yujin.

"Hmm...so, most professors are having the same emergency meeting today. I wonder what do they talk about.” said Eunbi.

The whole table went for a short moment of silent as each of the girls was trying to take a guess on the issue. Even Yena had paused from chewing the baked beans in her mouth just to try and give a thought about the topic. At the moment, only one of them seemed to not be giving a single hoot about the discussion while shaking her leg anxiously.

"Urgh~ screw it! I don’t want to have a broken neck by the end of today’s class, so I'm leaving," erupted Sakura, aggressively picking up her stuff from the table before rushing off towards the exit.

Suddenly, something bizarre happened. All the chairs and tables inside the dining hall somehow began to move by itself. Sakura who was only a feet away from the exit paused her steps in bewilderment as she realized that the entire ground was shaking.

"Y-Yah, what the hell is happening!?" questioned Yena in shock.

All the leftover of their meal spilled to the floor due to the strong-mild earthquake. The intense rumbling of ground also made the girls starting to lose their balance a bit.

"Guys, we need to get out of here! I think the building is going to collapse soon," yelled Eunbi.

The girls nodded to Eunbi's command. They grabbed onto each others' hand and ran towards the exit across the room. Sakura meanwhile still hadn’t move from where her standing, holding tightly to the door handle while waiting for her friends’ arrival to made their escape together.

"Guys, faster!" shouted Sakura from afar, holding tightly to the door handle.

As the ground kept shaking on high rate, the ceiling started to crack with debris pouring on them. Yujin who was on the run while nimbly avoiding the broken tiles, noticed a large pile of concrete about to come off from the ceiling, located precisely above Sakura's head.

"Kkura-unnie, move away from there!" shouted Yujin.

Unfortunately, Sakura couldn't heard her due to the deafening noise of the crumbling wall.

At this point, Yujin couldn't seem to ignore the warning. The concrete piece was only held by a single steel cable before it would completely fell on top of Sakura’s head .

Going by her full instinct, Yujin let go of Nako's hand and dashed forward with an amazing pace. Despite having stumbled a few times by the broken tiles, she was able to avoid as many concrete ceiling that were raining on them like a rocky snow.

However, just a few steps before she could finally reached Sakura, the steel cable holding the concrete had completely detached, causing it to free-fall to the ground by the natural law of gravity.

Running out of time and option, Yujin instantly channeled all her inner energy to channel her special ability. With her gifted ability, she launched herself 10 feet above the ground while effortlessly covering a 15 meter distance with full momentum to smash the concrete into pieces with her bare fist before she crash-landed onto the ground.

"Oh God, Yujin-ah! A-Are you okay? Let me help you up."

Sakura quickly helped Yujin to get back on her feet before they both making their way out of the dining room. After Eunbi, Yena, Nako and Minju also succeeded in making their escape from the dining hall, the girls worked their feet towards the dormitory as instructed by the announcement from the headmaster earlier.

******

As they were running across the bridge connecting the academic building and the dormitory, a loud thud intensified across the island, putting the girls on shock therefore pausing their steps after hearing it. What they saw next as they turned their head around was unbelievable with their eyes. Chills crawled over their spines and a jolt was sent across their body by the frightening scenery that lied upon them. A huge army of dark mages were raining the entire the kingdom with dark magic, creating almost like a spontaneous firework show as the attack collided with the transparent magical barrier that served as a first-line protector of the floating island.

"Shit...that doesn't look good," said Yena, stating the obvious.

"Oh no, we're so doomed now," added Minju, being a bit more paranoid as usuals.

"The dark magic is really strong that the impact when it collides with the barrier causes an earthquake to the whole island," explained Nako, looking terrified and amazed at the same time.

"How much longer can the barrier stands at this rate?" asked Yujin, mouth was half opened while observing the scale of mess they about to face.

Just as Yujin was saying, the barrier started to break little by little. The army of dark mages swamped into the loophole of the broken part of the barrier and later on, in the count of a few seconds on hand, the protective shield had completely teared down, leaving the kingdom with full vulnerability of an attack by the enemy. The dark mages led by their king, Lord Drakka, launched a full force attack toward the kingdom, creating explosions and chaos on every part of the island where local villagers and citizens were scattered all over the place to seek their safety.

With a huge advantage on the enemy’s hand by the surprise attack, a group of tyranny dark mages charged toward the academy and raided the school compound, creating a complete panic situation among the students. The professors along with the entirety of the academy's workforce were all doing the best in their capabilities to provide defense and ensuring the students' safety.

Meanwhile, the six girls remained still on the bridge, truly in awe and at the same time clueless of the steps they should be taking from there.

"Shit, they're coming at us," said Eunbi, stating the obvious.

"Unnie, what do we do now? There's no use for us to hide at the dorm anymore at this rate," asked Yujin.

"Hmm...I say we fight them," replied Eunbi.

"A-Are you serious, unnie? I mean...we're still not ready, we don't have full control of our power yet," said Minju, voice starting to tremble.

"Haha, are you scared, Minju? Don't worry, I'll burn them all for you," said Yena in confidence, lighting up a ball of flame on her right hand.

"Okay, listen. They are coming now and we can't only depend on the teachers to protect us. About what Minju said, I believe we already train long enough and this is the time to apply what we have learnt," briefed Eunbi. "As you guys can see, we are obviously outnumbered by them. So, our plan here is just to defend ourselves and watch each others' back, at least until the helps arrive."

After the short briefing by the oldest, all the girls had no choice but to gather their courage and stood their ground.

"We'll move by pair now. Yena, you'll go with Minju, Sakura with Yujin, and Nako with me. Remember, watch each other backs and don't split too far with your partner, in case anything bad happen, alright?" reminded Eunbi.

All of them nodded as they understood the clear strategy explained by Eunbi.

"Okay, let's go, Minju-yah!" shouted Yena in confidence.

Truth be told, Yena was also nervous like the friends alongside her, but she also felt excited as she got to test her ability in real fights situation. She started off by engulfing her entire body with flames and flew to the airspace before taking down a couple of enemy with the fireballs shot from her bare hands.

"U-Unnie, wait for me!" yelled Minju with her trembling voice.

For some reason, Minju still didn't move her feet from the bridge. Eunbi who also possessed psychic ability, use her power to read Minju's mind.

"Minju-yah, I know you're scared, but we have no choice now. You need to be confident with your power to be able to defense yourself. As far as I know, you are the best archer in the school, and you also get high mark in combat skills, so I think you are more than ready to fight these bastards. You just need to trust yourself. We can do this," said Eunbi softly, trying to lift up the girl’s spirit.

Minju wiped her eyes that was getting teary after being overly terrified a moment ago. Being the princess of Akua, she channeled her power to form a solid ice bow and arrows by simply freezing the air particle around her. With her forte weapon on hand, she then began to join the fight by shooting down enemies from the bridge, covering Yena’s blind spot in the hectic aerial war ground.

"Damn. Nice shot," praised Yena in awe after a dark mage she was battling with getting struck with an arrow right through its head by Minju.

"Focus, unnie!”

Meanwhile, Sakura and Yujin already moved to the school ground to help the teachers. Sir Junho who were busy fighting, suddenly noticed Yujin and Sakura presence.

"Yujin, Sakura! You aren't suppose to be out here now," said Sir Junho.

"We want to help, sir. We're confident that we can help you to defend the school," replied Yujin.

Sakura who was standing beside her silently nodded as she agreed with Yujin's statement.

Sir Junho was reluctant to allow them to fight, but after considering on how outnumbered they were, he agreed to the offer.

"Fine. In that case, here's the plan. Yujin, you'll cover the ground with me. Sakura, you'll take the aerial side," briefed Sir Junho.

"Got it, sir!" Yujin and Sakura answered simultaneously.

Yujin jumped into the fight straightaway and kicked the enemies’ asses with her tremendous superhuman strength, knocking down every dark mages around her.

Sakura on the other hand, was calmly channeling her energy. The sky began to turn dark above them as if a storm about to occur. Her feet was slowly floating above the ground while her eyes turning fully white, electric charge flowed all over her hand. Using her power, she stroke the dark mages with the blades of thunderstorms she casted from the sky.

On the other hand, Eunbi and Nako rushed to the dormitory to help the students that were trapped inside. The dormitory was on fire as the dark mages exploded the roof with their magic. Eunbi removed all the obstacles that blocking their way using her wind power. Some of the students were too scared to move, so Eunbi used her telekinesis ability to get inside their head and helped them escape.

As they proceed to the ground level, they encountered a group of dark mages moving in their direction. The mages started to attack them by throwing their magic shots.

Nako calmly concentrated her elemental power and strike her palms. A huge boulder emerged from the ground, acting as a shield to protect Nako and Eunbi from the strikes. Nako then stumped her feet, sending a strong waves below the ground. All the dark mages were thrown away by the impact of Nako's attack.

However, no matter how many times they tried to kill the dark mages, it just hopeless. The dark mage kept resurrecting from dead and continued to attack them. At one point, the six girls were starting to get exhausted and losing their focus. Suddenly, Yena got hit by the dark magic and fell to the ground.

"Y-Yena-unnie!"

Minju got shocked after witnessing the incident in front of her. She rushed to the ground to check on Yena's condition.

While Minju was losing her focus on Yena, she also got hit from the back by the dark mages. Her head was bleeding as she was thrown hard to the ground, and soon, her vision became blurry bit by bit.

The dark mages approached Yena and Minju who were lying next to each other, intending to end those girls' life. Yena who was still able to see them coming, but unable to move her body as she was in deep pain. She closed her eyes tightly, ready to accept her fate.

"I-I'm sorry, Minju-yah...I've fail to protect us this time."

******

"Princess Yena, Princess Minju! Are you alright?"

A familiar voice surrounded Yena’s ear while she was closing her eyes tightly, realizing that it must be the voice that would gave her the second chance of sontiinue her live. At the perfect moment before the dark mages could finished them, the royal soldiers made a heroic entrance at the scene where they shot down the luring enemy and saved the girls from a quick death.

Yena who was just getting ready to accept her fate a few seonds ago, opened her eyes with a sigh of relief.

"Oh, General Zhao! You came just in time. I thought that would be the end for us just now," said Yena while lying on the ground.

"The kings has give me order to bring back all six princesses to the palace as soon as possible. They have an important message for all of you," said General Zhao.

Yena just nod to whatever the general said. She was just grateful that she was still breathing air at the moment. General Zhao proceed to gather all the six princesses and bring them back to the palace safely.

All the kings of the six tribes were sitting on their thrones at the main hall of the Oneiric Palace, already waiting to welcome the return of their beloved daughters and the heiresses to their thrones.

"Welcome back, our princesses. We are all very deeply worried about your safety just now. Thank God all of you are still alive."

The kings proceeded to hug their daughters first things first, truly grateful for the fact that none of them were harmed from the attack. The girls also very happy to be able to meet their parents again. Suddenly, Yena remembered something.

"Father, what's the important message that you want to tell us?" asked Yena while being in her father’s arm.

"Oh, about that... I will tell you in a moment, my dear. Princesses, please, take your seats now," ordered Emperor Choi, the king of Pyro nation and the father of Yena.

"As it already came to your knowledge, our kingdom are currently under a great attack of the wicked Shadow tribes. They are indeed a very powerful enemy of us for as long as this kingdom was first established, and I believe today they have came to seek revenge on us over the damned history that happened centuries ago. Here also, I must admit, with the great number of armies they have, along with the dangerous flair of dark magic they possess, we might need a bit more luck on our side in order to defeat them, especially with Lord Drakka as their mastermind. Therefore, after considering those factors in this critical situation, we, the united leaders of Oneiric, has come to a decision that we will send you princesses to the Human Realm for a short while."

The surprising announcement sent all the girls flustered in their seat. None of them had ever been to the human world and never thought that they would have to go in any day of their lifetime.

"B-But, Your Highness...if I may ask... why? What do we have to do there?" asked Eunbi, hankering for a more clear explanation of why the drastic decision was made.

"The decision was made to protect all of you from the attack and also as an insurance to persevere our community in the future. Each of you is the only heiress to our thrones. If anything bad may happen to you within the outcome of this war, then that will mark the fall down of our long-built empire, therefore the deceased of our tribes", explained Emperor Choi.

"But we also want to fight, Father. We can use our power and fighting skills we learnt to help defend our kingdom," addressed Yena in passion.

All the other girls also agreed with Yena. They didn't want to run away to another realm and hiding like a coward while their kingdom was being turned into a pit of clash and bloodshed.

"Forgive us, Princess Yena, but we cannot allow your request. All of you are the most valuable assets to our kingdom at this moment. You might be our only hope to continue the legacy of our empire in the next future. We can’t be certain of what the outcome of this war would be, but in case any of us failed to stand, then you're the one who are destined take our place and bring back glory to our kingdom," told Emperor Kwon.

The six princesses remained silent on their seat. The fact that they would be sent far away from home in a few moment and lived apart from their family in a distinct place was a really hard to swallow pills for them , especially knowing that their parents' life were at high stake in the clash.

"My princesses, please, don't be sad. I promise you, we will still be in touch and we have prepare all your necessity in the Human Realm. You just need to stay there for a while until we put this war to end. We promise everything will be fine and things will go back as they used to be.”

All the girls started to get teary eyes. They would be separated from their parents for a long time and went to a place that was very different from their world. They did not know if they would be able to adapt in human world. Despite all of them possessed power and were physically strong, deep down they were still a young woman who need the love and guidance of their parents.

Suddenly, a loud, thundering noise could be heard from outside the palace, followed with a mild earthquake shaking the ground beneath their feet. Apparently, the dark mages were battling the royal guards at the bridge to force their entry into the majestic house. However, it seemed like the guards would not be able to defend it any longer as the amount and strength of the dark mages was too much for them to defend.

"Quick! Follow us." Emperor Choi and the other five tribal leaders guided them to a hidden door that lead to the basement where the inter-dimensional portal was hidden.

The girls had no choice but to follow the order of their parents. As they hurried down the generous amount of stairs, they could finally saw the teleportation portal that will send them to the human world in the form of big hollow ring sitting on top a square platform. All of them hugs their parents for the last time.

"I'll miss you, Father," whispered Yena to Emperor’ Choi ear as she hugged for the last time. Her voice was trembling as she tried to control her emotions.

"Me too, my princess. Take care. We'll meet again soon, I promise," replied Emperor Choi, while Yena was hugging him tightly.

"And Princess Eunbi, I hope you can become a good leader of your fellow friends there. I believe with the level of maturity you have at your age and also a great value of responsibility, you'll be able to guide your friends and survive there well enough," said Emperor Choi.

Eunbi just nodded her head while trying her best to contain her tears. She knew that she needed to be emotionally and mentally stronger to be able to lead her fellow friends in this new journey. After finished saying their last goodbye, the six princesses stepped onto the designated platform with a heavy heart.

"Best wishes to all of you. We'll be in touch soon."

All six leaders proceed to take their position, circling the platform with the girls standing in the center. They put their hand together while mouthing their sacred tribal chant along with some silent prayers to their late ancestors, gathering a sufficient amount of their elemental energy before before blasting it towards the center of mid-air. As their powers collided, they managed to summon the inter-dimensional gate in the form of a gradually expanding hollow ring, floating on top of the girls’ head with a tremendous scale of energy force field. The earlier stagnant and somber little basement was now illuminated by blinding white lights, together with strong winds whirling across the entire room. As the portal expanded to its limit, signifying it have reached its required amount of energy, a beam of purple light flashed onto the platform where the six girls were standing with their eyes tightly closed and hands locking onto each other’s, teleporting them to a dimension far, far away from their current one within a flash.

After a few seconds, the six girls sensed a new environment around them. It was really calm and quiet, a total far cry from the scene they experienced in the basement a while ago. Only the chirping sound of cicada could be heard, while their nose caught a nature scent of green grasses and wet trunks as soft, cold breeze brushed through their faces. With a mix of nervous and anxious feelings in their chest, the girls slowly re-opened their eyes to uncover the sight of the new world they stepping in, therefore launching off their new journey in what they be thought as the Human Realm.

"So... this is the human world?"

To Be Continued...

***Photo editing clip art credit :

-falling leaves picture in edited photo :

<a href='https://pngtree.com/so/Floating'>Floating png from pngtree.com/</a>

#choiyena #kimminju #kwoneunbi #yabukinako #ahnyujin #miyawakisakura #izone #fanfic #au

1 note · View note

hopen4e · 8 years

Text

Fem!Japan x The Netherlands

NAMES: Fem!Japan = Sakura Honda; Netherlands = Mogens Govert

Netherlands visits Nyo Japan to coax her into opening her country borders. He doesn’t like the idea of America getting to her first. Poor sweet Sakura doesn’t know how persuasive Mogens can be. One-Shot. Based on Episode 2 of Hetalia: The World Twinkle Specials (Dub)

Japan had diplomatic regulations with Britain, Spain and Portugal, however, after closing her country Mr. Netherlands was the only one with whom she continued the trading relationship.

At the beginning of the 19th c., ships from Western countries started loitering around Japan’s borders, so Mr. Netherlands decided to let Miss Japan know exactly what was going on.

Sakura had always had great respect for Mogens, and knew she could rely on him to give her honest information. It seemed that she had special regard to him and always looked forward to their meetings. Little did she know, his respect for her ran much deeper than that. He was in love with her. This petite Japanese girl, had been on his mind for a very long time and he had sworn to tell her nothing but the truth and protect her from harm in any way he could. Sadly, she was an extremely shy person and felt really uncomfortable with physical contact, which made it harder for him to engage something abrupt, since he was afraid that he might frighten her with his huge rough form and she would never approach him with the same gentle smile as before.

There he was again, striding towards her home, with his trusty pipe in his mouth and a bouquet of colourful fragrant tulips.

The news Mogens was carrying was nothing new to Sakura. He just made an excuse to visit her, strengthen their bond and try to get closer to her. He wanted to become special to the beautiful girl. Everything Sakura was as a person was beautiful to him. Thoughts of her were entrenched in his mind and he was dominating her in most of them. He tried hard to push those lascivious thoughts out of his brain, but her small figure came haunting him over and over again. He cursed at how weak he was when it came to her and sped up.

When he finally arrived he was greeted by a maid.

“Wercome! Oh, Mr. Netherrands, I am sorry to say…you came so far…but Miss Japan…is not feering werr! Do you mind coming back on a different day?” The maid blushed at the handsome Dutch man and lowered her gaze. He wasn’t having any of this bullshit today! He was tired of waiting. He shoved the bouquet into her hands.

“Shut your mouth and get to work! I need tea, a cute little cake and Japan. Right now!” His brutish response only excited the usually reserved maid. What woman could resist a well-built European savage, anyway?

“I can ret you see Miss Japan, but with arr this stuff going on, she is a rittre more dericate than usuar. So, prease, be courteous…and by courteous I mean nice!”

“Delicate? Has she been hanging out with Austria?” Mogens knew Sakura was cute and baby-like, but he was also aware of her fighting skills. When it came to combat, she kicked ass like a true honorable warrior. The maid gave him what he ordered and quickly explained the situation as she led him to Japan’s room.

“Hey, Sakura! I have come to discuss something with you. May I come in?” He knocked twice and stood outside her door. He suddenly stiffened when he heard weeping. Anger was building up inside of him and his chest hurt. He didn’t wait for a response and swiftly opened the door.

“Shut the door! No sunright, prease!” Sakura wailed in discomfort and wrapped herself in her blanket like a cocoon. Mogens blushed when he caught a glimpse of her bare shoulder. She wasn’t the type to reveal much of her skin and she was very strict and careful about how she dressed.

He gingerly placed the tray with the tea and cake on the small table beside her futon, and sat himself cross-legged. He scrutinized her for a moment, taking a pull at his unlit pipe. The maid’s words echoed in his mind. He didn’t want to stress Sakura out, so he decided to listen to the maid and take it slow. He put his pipe on the table and sighed deeply before taking a sip of the tea.

“This tea is bitter, Ja?” Mogens was impatient to start a conversation already.

“What brought you here today, Mr. Netherrands? I bet it is not the tea!” Sakura finally sat up to face him and peeked out of the blanket. “You seem to be under pressure. Are you under pressure, Mr. Netherrands?” When her eyes met his, she noticed some tension and felt the need to ask how he was. She was always so sweet, polite and caring, it made him want to jump her and shield her from the rest of the world. He blushed and looked away as indecent thoughts flooded his mind once more. For now, he would have to teach her to refer to him by his first name, at least!

“Please, call me Mogens…Oh, Ja…about that, what…” This was his chance to begin the topic that would slowly lead him to her heart…and later her bed, but he knew Sakura pretty well to guess he would have to wait some time before anything spicy happens. Unfortunately, she had a feeling they were going to talk about the situation with her borders, so she turned away from him again and covered herself with the blanket.

“I am sorry I have become rather sensitive to the worrd opening.” She whimpered and shivered a little. That damn blanket was in his way! He rubbed his forehead to calm town.

“Look, try not to loose it, but according to the information I’ve been given, America is heading in your direction and since he’s young and cocky he might be aggressive!” He was concerned about her well-being and had a bad feeling about Alfred. Sakura didn’t budge.

“Of course I understand, ever since my king was defeated I had a feering something of this sort would come to pass. The worrd around me has been changing, so it is onry naturar for me to change arong with them.” She sounded a bit lamentable.

“This is no surprise then?” He raised an eyebrow at her calmness.

“Not rearry!” Sakura loosened up a bit and the blanket uncovered her shoulder again. Mogens was now confused and aroused at the same time. Wasn’t she afraid at all?

“Then open your…” He was about to tell her for the hundredth time to reconsider opening her country but she covered herself again and clutched the blanket. He had had enough and decided it was time to stop fooling around. He wanted her now! He wanted her to know his feelings and finally get an answer to his agonizing questions.

Mogens grabbed the blanket and uncovered Sakura with one swift motion, yanking it away to the centre of the room. What was now revealed in front of him was the enchanting peachy cuteness from his fantasies. She was wearing a pink kimono-like sleeping robe with blue petals sewed at the ends of each sleeve. He had a second to stare at her fragile figure before she tried to cover herself.

As Sakura was about to scream at Mogens for disrespecting her privacy in such a way, he quickly covered her mouth. The touch of her soft lips against his palm filled him with desire and he wondered what they would feel like pressed against his own. Alas, his thoughts were interrupted by a sudden pain in his abdomen. She had Hiza Geri-ed his stomach and it took all his being to stifle a cry. He groaned in pain but instead of letting her go, he pressed himself even harder and went on top of her so she could not use her legs. She might know Karate but he was way stronger and bigger than her, and this time her agility couldn’t help.

Mogens had no intention of going beyond this position (at this point) because he didn’t want to hurt her or force her into anything. The reason why they were in this situation was because she startled him when he received the blow to his now aching belly and freaked out.

Sakura was goggling at him and both were breathing heavily.

All of a sudden, the door opened to reveal the maid.

“Excuse me. I brought tea and more cute cake for you.” She was smiling cheerfully until she saw the awkward position they were in. She shrieked, dropped the tray she was holding, and screamed. “What do you think you are doing? You said that you would not upset her!” The maid rushed to their side and started pulling Netherlands away from Japan.

Eventually, after the “small” incident , Mogens was able to apologize and explain his behaviour to Sakura. She accepted his apologies and shyly listened to his devoted and passionate declaration of love. Her response was not quick and she said she needed some time to think about it.

1854

“Hey, Mr Netherlands!” One of Netherland’s messengers ran towards him waving a letter.

“Stop yelling, what is it?”

“Japan has accepted America’s repeated demands to open the country, they signed an official peace treaty.” Mogens was a bit jealous of the American. Both of them were silent for a moment.

“Mr Netherlands?”

“Mm…?” He was staring off into space, thinking of various ways to destroy the annoying runt, unaware of the good news which awaited him.

“Sir, Miss Japan has sent you a message as well.” His eyes lit up and he pulled the letter from the man’s hands, tearing it open.

Letter:

“Dear Mr. Govert,

I put a lot of consideration into your confession last week, and despite what happened between us when you last visited me, I have come to the decision of accepting your heartfelt emotional attachment to my person.

I sincerely hope that my response is not belated and there is still a chance for us to meet again and talk the matters over.

P.S.: I did not entirely dislike our little scramble during our last encounter.

P.P.S.:Please, excuse my immodest statement!!!

Sincerely yours,

Honda Sakura”

This girl…this magnificent pure hearted girl just announced her feelings for him in the cutest letter ever! Mogens was speechless. He reread the letter six times and was overjoyed to see that she wanted to meet again.

Who knew a little roughness on his side could lead her into his arms?!

Sakura received many letters and flowers that same week.

#nyo japan #netherlands #hetalia #aph #aph japan #aph netherlands #japan

18 notes · View notes

kuriquinn · 8 years

Text

In Another Life

Summary: “So, I’d risk tetanus just to see you. Apparently, it’s not just reflexes I’d be lacking in, but common sense.” In which Sakura imagines a different life, and Sasuke somehow manages to be sweet and an ass at the same time. [SasuSaku Festival 2017 – Day 6 – Prompt: “Civilian & Shinobi Love”]

Disclaimer: This story utilises characters, situations and premises that are copyright Masashi Kishimoto, Shueisha, Shonen Jump and Viz media. No infringement on their respective copyrights pertaining to episodes, novelisations, comics or short stories is intended by KuriQuinn in any way, shape or form. This fan-oriented story is written solely for the author's own amusement and the entertainment of the readers. It is not for profit. Any resemblance to real organizations, institutions, products or persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental.

All plot and Original Characters except for those introduced in the canon books, manga, video games, novelizations and anime, are the sole creation of KuriQuinn. (© KuriQuinn 2016- )

Rating: K

Warning: Spoilers for pretty much everything up to Chapter 699. Dialogue-only fic.

Canon-Compliance: As close to canon as fanfiction can possibly be. With a few personal additions :P Takes place during the Blank Period.

Beta Reader: Sakura's Unicorn

“Do you ever think about it?”

“Think about what?”

“If we weren’t shinobi. Or if only one of us was. Would that’ve changed anything?”

“…No.”

“Really? You think so?”

“You would’ve still found your way to a profession that helps people. That’s who you are.”

“I find it funny that you assume I’d be the one who ended up a civilian in this scenario.”

“Balance of probability. I can’t see myself as anything else.”

“Really? Because I have no problem picturing you as working in a restaurant or a café or something. It’s your all-encompassing love of people, you know?”

“Your sense of humour leaves much to be desired.”

“But, darling, you’d look so good in a uniform!”

“Tch. I’m going back to sleep now.”

“No, no—listen! I could come by to see you after my latest mission from ANBU, order a coffee—”

“You have an overactive imagination.”

“—and I’d be the only one whose order you always knew perfectly, because you looove me—”

“Debatable.”

“—and I’d always choose that shop because your coffee is amazing.”

“This would never happen, Sakura.”

“But it would! You make excellent coffee—you know, for a tea-drinker.”

“Why would I own a café if I don’t drink coffee?”

“I didn’t say you’d own it, just that you’d work there.”

“So, not only am I not a shinobi, but I’m not even an entrepreneur.”

“I don’t think you have the patience to start your own business.”

“And yet, apparently, I have the patience for public service?”

“Of course! You’d just have to look at people a certain way and they’d shut up and buy whatever you told them to. And no one would ever complain because they’d be too afraid.”

“…”

“And, of course, you’d work with Naruto because he wouldn’t be a shinobi either.”

“Oh?”

“In fact, I’d be the one on the fast track to becoming the next Hokage.”

“I see. And what would the illustrious next Hokage be doing, wasting her time on some café worker?”

“They call them baristas.”

“Baris—no, they don’t.”

“Yes, they do.”

“That’s not a word.”

“It is so, you dinosaur! Which you’d know if we ever spent any time in the bigger cities. There’s an entire café culture.”

“If you say so. But you haven’t answered my question.”

“Which question?”

“Why would an elite shinobi with the talent to become the next Hokage want to spend time with a lowly barista?”

“Just because you sneer, doesn’t make it any less of a word.”

“Tch.”

“Anyway, the answer’s simple.”

“...Yes?”

“Because you’d be my caffeine supplier! You don’t get between a healer and her caffeine.”

“Ah. Naturally.”

“And, of course, all the injuries.”

“Injuries?”

“Well, you’d keep getting angry at Naruto or Kiba for something—”

“Why is Kiba in this fantasy of yours?”

“It’s not a fantasy. And he’s there because I think he annoys you more than Naruto does, and it would have to be someone really irritating for you to keep accidentally burning your fingers on hot kettles or crushing glasses to stop yourself from punching him whenever he says something stupid.”

“It would seem this fictional version of me is very uncoordinated.”

“Well, you wouldn’t be a shinobi, so you wouldn’t have all those great reflexes.”

“I see.”

“And so, with all the injuries, you’d always end up at the hospital. And I’d have to take care of you because, like I said, caffeine supplier—I couldn’t leave you in just anyone’s hands.”

“I thought you were ANBU? You wouldn’t be at the hospital.”

“Okay, maybe not always, but in my spare time. You’d be so stubborn about it, too. If I was on a mission, you’d suffer in silence until I came in again. Then you’d pretend you weren’t hurt, waiting for me to notice and take pity on you and heal you.”

“So, I’d risk tetanus just to see you. Apparently, it’s not just reflexes I’d be lacking in, but common sense.”

“…I’m not touching that one with a ten-foot pole.”

“…”

“Don’t give me that look.”

“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Yes, you do.”

“Your back is to me and you can’t see in the dark.”

“Doesn’t matter. I know your every expression. And face it, you’ve never been the poster child for— ow!”

“Sakura?!”

“Um, hold that thought.”

“Are you all right?”

“I’m fine. She just…decided to use my ribs for taijutsu practice, I think.”

“Do you need—?”

“No, no. Stay put. I’m just going to turn over. Oof! Okay. That’s…that’s not really much better.”

“Do you need help standing up? You seem to feel better when you walk around.”

“Maybe in a little while. She might calm down again. Here. Give me your hand.”

“Here?”

“Yes. Right there. Sometimes she stops if she meets a little resistance.”

“Are we sure she’s mine then?”

“Very funny.”

“…”

“Mmm. Warm hand. I knew I kept you around for a reason.”

“I thought it was for my supposed coffee-making skills.”

“Oh, of course. And the way you look in a uniform, of course. Don’t forget that.”

“You’ve never seen me in a uniform.”

“Doesn’t mean I can’t imagine it.”

“You realise all of this is moot. It would never happen. I only ever wanted to be a shinobi.”

“I know.”

“It was a life that was good enough for…my parents and my brother. I wanted it, too. I didn’t know anything else.”

“I know, Sasuke. And…and your family did run the village police.”

“Yes.”

“So, no matter what, you were going to grow up to protect people.”

“Hm.”

“I guess I’d be the civilian after all. I wasn’t even supposed to become a shinobi, you know.”

“…”

“It wasn’t something I was interested in. My parents had me enter the Academy because I was really shy. They hoped it’d get me to break out of my shell. And as time went on, all I wanted to do was impress Ino. Oh, and of course, get noticed by a certain someone.”

“…”

“Anyway, if…if things hadn’t gone the way they did, I don’t know what I would’ve done. Teach at a civilian school. Maybe.”

“You would be a good teacher.”

“Maybe. I probably wouldn’t have a choice. And…well…I guess if I were a civilian, you’d never look my way.”

“You have pink hair, Sakura. It’s impossible not to look at you.”

“I think there was a compliment in there.”

“I just said you’d be a good teacher.”

“You know what I mean. And I’d just like to point out that before you side-tracked us into this coffee-shop-police-officer-teacher scenario—”

“Because, clearly, I’m the who dreamed all this up.”

“—I was actually asking about us. Not our jobs. Not what we…could’ve been. I just was wondering…do you think…do you think we would’ve still ended up together?”

“I don’t know.”

“Oh.”

“It’s…that’s not a fair question, Sakura. There are too many—infinite—factors that would affect something like that.”

“I guess…”

“…”

“I would…like to think we would.”

“Really?”

“That surprises you?”

“It’s just…sometimes I wonder, you know, if the only reason you…well, if the only reason you wanted to be with me was because…because I…”

“Because you’re the only person foolish enough to care for me?”

“So, you did think it was foolish.”

“No. Unwarranted, maybe. Especially considering everything.”

“Most of that wasn’t your fault.”

“Enough of it was.”

“…”

“I will never stop being thankful to you.”

“I know…”

“And it’s not…you know that’s not the only reason. For this. For any of it.”

“I know—of course, I know! Really, it’s just hormones. They make me self-conscious and silly. I mean, really! You in a coffee-shop or me as a teacher? I can’t even imagine what I’d do if I had a student like Naruto—or one like me! I’d be horrible. I’d probably punt the little bastard through a window.”

“Iruka should have done that more often with Naruto.”

“Yes, well, that might work in the Academy, but I don’t think you’re allowed to attack students in a civilian school. It might cause a scandal or something. And that’d just be another strike against me, right?”

“What do you mean?”

“Well, I’d be a civilian, and a horrible teacher as well. Not exactly the girl you bring home to meet your parents. But you wouldn’t be bringing me home anyway because I’m not an Uchiha.”

“You are an Uchiha.”

“You know what I mean. I know your family was traditional. They would’ve expected you to choose some gorgeous, genius, ultra-talented Uchiha girl or something.”

“I would say those expectations have been met.”

“…”

“That’s…you… How is it that you can be sweet and an ass at the same time?”

“It’s a talent of the universally reviled. We tend to be utterly contradictory.”

“You’re not kidding.”

“It helps that I’m being completely truthful.”

“Sasuke, if you don’t stop, I’m going to start crying again. And then I’ll get snot and drool all down your chest, and you’ll get grumpy and move away, and then I’ll get cold and have curl up against your back, and whenever I do that you complain that she’s kicking you, and—”

“Sakura…stop talking.”

“I’m just saying.”

“And if you weren’t so busy in your fantasy world, you’d have noticed she stopped kicking a while ago. Unless you plan on sleepwalking tomorrow, or you want me carrying you again—”

“Oh, gods no, that was just embarrassing.”

“—then you should get some sleep.”

“Hey, who’s the medic here? I know my own limits!”

“Don’t they say that healers make the worst patients?”

“I can think of a worse patient than me…”

“Goodnight, Sakura.”

“Goodnight, darling.”

“…”

“I would’ve chosen you anyway.”

“Wha…?”

“Even if something different was expected, I would’ve chosen you.”

“…”

Sniffle.

“Sakura? Are you…are you actually crying?”

“It’s your f-fault! I warned you, you b-big jerk!”

終わり

Comments and constructive criticism are always welcome, but if you feel like keeping me caffeinated out of the goodness of your heart, it certainly would be appreciated! I’m also starting to post original works to my patreon.

I’m only able to keep writing as I do thanks to the support of readers like you, so every bit helps!

栗

#humour #drama #fluff #romance #sasusaku #sakura uchiha #sasuke uchiha #ssfestival2017 #Blank Period #legacy of fire

127 notes · View notes

sasusakufestival · 8 years

Text

Grin and Bear It

Summary: “It’s nice to see that she’s gotten over her infatuation with you.” “This isn’t funny.” In which Karin is over-protective, Sakura is amused and Sasuke broods. [SasuSaku Festival 2017 – Day 8 – Prompt: “Protective of Us”]

Disclaimer: This story utilizes characters, situations and premises that are copyright Masashi Kishimoto, Shueisha, Shonen Jump and Viz Media. No infringement on their respective copyrights pertaining to episodes, novelizations, comics or short stories is intended by the author in any way, shape or form. This fan oriented story is written solely for the author’s own amusement and the entertainment of the readers. It is not for profit. Any resemblance to real organizations, institutions, products or persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental. All fiction, plot and Original Characters with the exception of those introduced in the books, manga, video games, novelizations and anime, are the sole creation of KuriQuinn and using them without permission is considered rude, in bad-taste and will reflect seriously on your credibility as a writer. You will have your arm broken by a pregnant goddess should you be found plagiarizing.

Warning:Spoilers for pretty much everything up to Naruto Gaiden.

Canon-Compliance: As close to canon as fanfiction can possibly be. With a few personal additions :P Takes place during the Blank Period.

Fanon-Compliance: Takes place several years before An Inch of Gold and Unplanned.

AN: This scene pretty much jumped into my head when reading the prompt. I wanted an example of Karin being awesome in a SasuSaku fic for once. And yay, more dialogue!

AN2: Also, for those of you waiting for my Day 7 Prompt, it’s still coming. It’s just taking me a little longer than expected to work out the final kinks, but if I can’t at least finish the whole thing by tomorrow, I’ll probably upload the first part of it, as the first part still fits the prompt, and then just continue it after the festival. It’s mostly written, so it won’t be a drawn out thing like IOG.

Beta Reader: Sakura’s Unicorn

“Karin –”

“No.”

“Now, Karin.”

“No!”

“If you don’t let me hold my child, I swear I’ll –”

“What? You'll what?! Stab me in the chest again?”

“…”

“Besides, you can’t hold her – you’ll drop her.”

“I will not drop her.”

“Your hand and forearm are broken, you big idiot. Never mind the fact that you’ve only got the one, so excuse me if I’m not going to take that chance! You can hold her when Sakura’s well enough to heal you.”

“If you would just –”

“No. Not gonna happen. Nuh-uh. I’ve healed your ungrateful ass for the last time!”

“Karin, I think –”

“Shh, Sakura. You should be resting. Your healing abilities aren’t going to kick in again if you don’t get some sleep.”

“She’s right. You should be sleeping.”

“Well, I would be if you two weren’t so loud. I’m surprised you haven’t woken the baby.”

“Yeah, Sasuke. Shut up.”

“…”

“You can glare at me all you want. I’m not changing my mind.”

“I don’t need your permission.”

“Oh, I’m sorry. Who just delivered this child? Was it you? I don’t think so!”

“You didn’t either.”

“Clearly, the pain of your injury has affected your ability to pay attention.”

“I’ve had worse than this. Pass me the baby.”

“Prove it. If you can pick up that medical bag over there and hold it over your head for the next five minutes, I’ll think about it.”

“There’s nothing to think about! She’s not your child! You did not physically pass a human being out of your –”

“I swear, if the two of you don’t shut up right now – shannaro!”

“Sorry.”

“…I apologise.”

“…”

“I’m still not handing her over.”

“Is there a reason why you’re being so difficult? Other than the usual?”

“Hmph! You don’t understand anything. Just like a man –”

“Karin.”

“–always making it all about you and what you want. Gods! You haven’t changed at all!”

“You’re being ridiculous. You helping Sakura deliver the baby doesn’t mean you can –”

“Sakura and I bonded in that moment! You clearly don’t understand sisterhood or anything to do with women if you think any different! She and I and the baby will always have this, and don’t you dare spoil it with your…you-ness.”

“That’s not even a word.”

“Tough! You brought Sakura and the baby here to be properly cared for and, so help me, I’m gonna do that! Now, I’ve got to go check Sarada for enzyme deficiencies, hyperthyroidism, and any other conditions I can think of. You are going to stay here and watch Sakura for any sign of complications and, if there’s anything, then and only then will you come get me. And then maybe – just maybe – if you stop pissing me off, I’ll fix your arm. And once I’m convinced you’re not about to drop her – and not an instant before – you can hold the baby, got it?”

“…”

“I said, ‘got it?’”

“…understood.”

“Good. And don’t you dare bitch to your wife while I’m gone. She needs to rest!”

“…”

“Heh. She’s gone now.”

“I noticed.”

“It’s nice to see that she’s gotten over her infatuation with you.”

“This isn’t funny.”

“Apparently, it’s not just Naruto you have issues with, darling, but all Uzumakis.”

“This is unacceptable.”

“I think it’s sweet.”

“There’s nothing sweet about not being allowed to hold my own daughter. That’s my right.”

“I know – but she does have a point. Do you really want to risk dropping the baby?”

“I don’t care how much pain I’m in, I wouldn’t drop her.”

“Of course you wouldn’t. But I don’t want you to be in pain while you’re holding our daughter for the first time. That’s a memory that should be pain-free.”

“…hm.”

“Don’t be angry at Karin. She’s been amazing throughout all of this. I know I was doubtful before, but if it hadn’t been for her…”

“I know.”

“Then stop looking so grumpy. The worst is over. It’s natural she would be a little protective of us now.”

“No, it isn’t.”

“Sasuke!”

“Protecting you both is my job, not hers.”

“No, I can protect myself. Our job is to protect our child. And we will. But, after we leave, it’ll be a long time before Karin sees us again. So, give her time with the baby.”

“This is insanity. I would blame painkillers if you had had any.”

“If that was a joke, I’m going to hit you.”

“Good luck with that. Sarada can probably make a stronger fist than you can right now.”

“You’re being mean to me. I’m telling Karin.”

“You’re talking entirely too much. Go to sleep. Or we’re in for another lecture.”

“Not until you promise to relax. Karin will be back here in no time, baby and all.”

“I can’t believe you’re trusting someone loyal to Orochimaru to care for our infant.”

“I’m not trusting someone loyal to Orochimaru. I’m trusting an old comrade of yours, who cared about you when I wasn’t around to do it, and who just helped deliver our baby and who would walk over broken glass before doing anything to hurt you.”

“…You have too much faith in people.”

“Well, you barely have any, so we balance each other out.”

“If she’s not back in half and hour, I’m going after her.”

“…”

“We made a tiny human.”

“We did.”

“Did you see her little toes? And tiny little fists? Weren’t they perfect?”

“They were.”

“Did you expect her to be that perfect? I knew she would be beautiful, but she’s actually perfect. W-with the long lashes and the tiny n-nose…!”

“I don’t understand…why are you crying?”

“Because I c-can’t believe we’re here! You and me, after everyth-thing, after all that time and I-I knew, the past few months I knew, but now it’s you and me and Sarada and she’s b-beautiful and we did that. Together. She might never have existed, but she does, and it’s just…I just…”

“…I know.”

“Sasuke…give me your arm.”

“Why?”

“I’m going to heal it.”

“What are you talking about? You’re not strong enough.”

“I’ll be fine. I’ve got enough chakra left for this, I think. It’ll knock me out, but you and Karin want me to rest anyway, so everyone wins. ”

“Your logic is not instilling me with confidence.”

“My logic is perfect. Give me your arm.”

“Sakura, I’m not –”

“You’re radiating anxiety, and it’s affecting my emotions and its making it hard for me to relax. You want me to be relaxed, Sasuke, I just pushed a watermelon sized creature out of an opening the size of a grapefruit. Do not make me repeat myself.”

“…”

“Good. Now, when I’m done, go make sure Karin doesn’t try to take over the world using our half-hour old infant.”

“…Hm.”

“And be polite.”

“Fine.”

“And if she offers to let you bite her, you say no, or you will never experience another blow-job in your life. Got it?”

“Understood.”

“Good.”

“…”

“I love you, you know that?”

“…I love you, too.”

終わり

I hope you enjoyed the story! As part of the SasuSakuFestival, please go to the ssfest page and vote, like and/or reblog, it would be majorly appreciated!

クリ

#ssfest17 #sasusaku #ssfanfiction #ssfestday8 #submission #ssfestentry

75 notes · View notes

coffeecupandteatime · 7 years

Text

Obscure Review #4

It’s time to spork fics and ruin lives.

I’m Coffee.

Hi, this is Tea. So what fresh hell have we placed ourselves into today Coffee?

Instead of Titans, we have ninjas, but there doesn’t seem to by an OC this time. So that’s a start.

We have entered a world of perpetual retardation. I’m the local alcoholic asshole, Jagerbomb ʕಠᴥಠʔ

This lovely little story is called When wind meets earth: A Naruto & Kurotsuchi story.

I’ll kick this off shitfest! Also: Prepare the rum!

As usual, we will be offensive. Don’t take this too personally.

Chapter 1: Moving to Konoha

Ooooooooh no.

This looks promising.

And I thought Struggle for Trost: The two monsters was a bad chapter title. This one’s just lazy.

Hey guys, it's Rice Man here with another Naruto fic to accompany the two I already have. This time it's a Naruto and Kurotsuchi pairing. I've grown quite fond of this pairing ever since I read a really good fic called 'Love your enemy' from a really talented author. Now my fic is not copying them in anyway

That doesn’t sound suspicious…

Nope, not at all.

ʕงಠᴥಠʔง I’ll fight the Author.

since it will feature an original plot and start off when the two of them are young then go on to Shippuden and will not be a Romeo & Juliet type of story. So sit back and enjoy this story!

Aw man, I was hoping for a tragedy. It would make this a thousand times more interesting.

Don’t tell me to relax. You’re only making me more nervous.

I’LL RELAX WHEN I GET MY VODKA! YOU RELAX!ʕ╯°ᴥ°ʔ╯︵ ┻━┻

Lastly, the cover image for this fic is the property of DeviantArt user indy-riquez.

+1 for giving credit where credit is due.

I get the feeling this story is based around an obscure pairing that is either not very popular or you’re the only one who thinks they should be together.

I get the feeling of “I don’t like Hinata or Sakura so I’mma make a near impossible pairing” here.

Episode one: Moving to Konoha

Oh god… We have episodes instead of chapters.

Wait. Didn’t you already mention the chapter?

This is lazy writing on so many levels.

-Iwagakure no Sato, Tsuchikage's office- It is around 7 in the evening in the office of the most powerful ninja in Iwagakure.

So this office has it’s own timezone? Cool!

Don’t you know? The offices of the most powerful ninja have their own timezones.

Iwa’s the place with rocks right? I wanna make rock puns.

Don’t, there will be plenty of puns to make later.

We see a short old man sitting behind a desk with a man beside him about early thirties holding a packet in hand.

I don’t see anybody.

Excellent descriptions.

The name of this man is Kitsuchi, one of the most respected Jonin within the village and the old man was Onoki, the third Tsuchikage. They are seen talking to a young girl who appears to be around 10 years of age. This girl was Kurotsuchi, the granddaughter of Onoki and Kitsuchi's daughter.

Truth be told, I never got very far in Naruto. None of these names mean anything to me. I don’t care if you are writing a fanfiction. At least give me a better idea of who these people are. As an author, that is your job.

I didn’t get very far in Shippuden, but I did read a good majority of the manga so I kinda know what’s going on from what I can remember.

Jagerbomb is not pleased. ʕ╯°ᴥ°ʔ╯︵ ┻━┻ I haven’t seen Naruto in a long time.

''Gramps you can't be serious!? Why are you sending me to Konoha?!'' The girl asked in anger

Trust me hon, we’re not exactly thrilled either.

Asked in anger. Asked in anger. AskED IN ANGER. REALLY?

We have another Katherine, so great at emotion.

Guys, I just realized that the guy doesn’t use quotation marks. Those are two apostrophes right next to each other...

''Kurotsuchi, it's for your own good dear, I'm not going to let the grudges our village and Konoha have go on any longer. It's unhealthy for us and sending you there would actually benefit the already strained relationship we have with them. So (COMMA) you can either accept to be part of the Shinobi Exchange Between Villages or you can kiss your dream of being a kunoichi good-bye. And just so you know, some of our civilians who needed work that have went as part of this on the employment side have sent back letters showing that they are enjoying life in Konoha.''

That’s a big wall of dialogue. So tell me, are they just sitting there, unmoving save for some mouth flaps?

I’m sorry, WHAT? In the manga or anywhere, it does not mention any ninja exchange program or Shinobi moving into the village, much less citizens.

I thought Iwa and Konoha HATED each other. O,,,,o Zoidberg is confused.

The young girl just groaned in pure frustration,

Ah, yes. Much emotion. Very good.

A+ writing skills.

Is this how you emote? ʕ╯°ᴥ°ʔ╯FUCK IT!

''Those villagers must be out of their minds, fuck Konoha and their shinobi exchange crap! I can't forgive them for killing mom! You know you still hate them for that dad don't deny it!''

We got a ten-year-old saying ‘fuck’! Call the police!

Also: Protagonist’s mother was killed by future home that she learns to love.

“Hey kid! Guess what? We’re sending you to that one village you hate so much! Never mind the fact that they were responsible for the death of your mother!”

Yep, because who needs consistency?

Kitsuchi just sighed at his daughter, ''Yes, I can't deny that Kurotsuchi, but you must remember that sending you there will greatly benefit us and our strained relationship with Konoha. What if another war breaks out again? We've barely recovered from the last one. Look at Konoha also, those guys have recovered very well in a short amount of time and don't worry daughter, the Yellow Flash sacrificed himself to protect the village from the Kyuubi attack 10 years ago so you don't have to live in the same village with him at least right?''

ARE THEY JUST A BUNCH OF FLOATING HEADS OR SOMETHING?

“I AM ZORDON! YOU ARE THE POWER RANGERS!”

''Tch, well you do have a point dad but still! I don't want to live in a village full of idiots and trash!'' Kurotsuchi pouted looking the other way

“Okay Dad...I’ll go to the stupid village of stupid people just because their stupid leader is dead!”

“You must go for political motives that really don’t make any sense. THOU MUST!”

Seriously? You’re calling them idiots and trash? Right now you’re making an idiot out of yourself.

Especially if this is the village with the ‘GOD OF SHINOBI/PROFESSOR’ leading it.

But seriously, I get where the author is going. It was commonplace in feudal era Japan for lords to send their kids to live under and serve another lord as a sign of trust. HOWEVER, the relations between the villages were not established other than they hate each others’ guts. Nowhere does it mention the benefits of the two villages allying. It mentions benefits, but leaves it at that. No further explanations. No specific reason, which might as well be no reason. They are literally asking their kids to enter enemy territory for no reason. Now, I don’t know about you, but I wouldn’t frivolously send my kids to a place I couldn’t trust. I completely agree with our whiny main character! This is ridiculous!

Onoki was about to lose his cool but decided not to vent it out on his beloved granddaughter (COMMA) but she could be such a pain in his ass sometimes. ''Kurotsuchi, you're living in Konoha as part of this exchange and in your place the Third Hokage's grandson will be living here.-

“I’m pretty sure that’s how it works anyway. It’s not like we established any trust and I don’t think the Hokage is going to be pleased sending his grandson here. Wait a minute, why am I referring to him as the Hokage? He’s not our leader, is he?”

He wouldn’t send his grandson, he is only a little kid if this is starting when I think it is.

Also: I’m pretty sure Konohamaru isn’t born yet considering he’s a lot younger than Naruto (Who's in his 40’s at the end of the the manga and anime, right?)

No, Konohamaru is born, he’s like 8 or something, this is taking place in the beginning of the series.

Either way, he’d be too young for this kind of travel to be sent to a village that HATES his.

- That is why this is beneficial to fixing our strained relationship. So you're leaving first thing in the morning young lady and that's final!''

Instead of being a good grandfather, he decides to force his grandchild to go to a completely different village.

“Go, dammit! I don’t want you hanging around here anyway! We may or may not trust Konoha village! So what if this endangers you!”

Basically sums his words up.

The 10-year(HYPHEN)old girl almost lost it when she heard that.

Almost lost what?

I lost my case of ale last week if that counts.

Almost lost her obviously prejudiced and non existent brain? Did it melt out of her ears?

She had a brain?

''No no no! I'm staying here and becoming a kunoichi of Iwa! Not Konoha!''

“I swear you’re just looking for an excuse to kick me out of the house and go on some ridiculous adventure with my sworn enemy!”

“For the plot, child, to please the Author.” I’m not please so ʕ╯°ᴥ°ʔ╯FUCK IT!

This is a very ill conceived plot to try and make you seem cool.

''Gah! You little whipper snapper! You're going to do this exchange whether you like it or not!'' Onoki shouted as his head comically increases in size scaring the young girl

“SURPRISE YOU LITTLE SHIT! DIDN'T SEE THAT COMING, DID YOU!”

Only Iruka can do that dammit! THAT’S LIKE HIS MOST ICONIC “JUTSU”!

Really? Just because it’s an anime thing doesn’t mean you've got to use it, not to mention this is kinda badly written.

It just looks dumb in writing.

The force of his screams shook the whole room and was loud enough to scare Kurotsuchi causing her to fall on her butt shaking in fear. ''F-fine! I'll do it, but I won't like it!"

We should have a cliche count at the end our reviews to be honest. Protagonist agrees to doing some she doesn’t like: +1 cliche point.

You don't have to like it dear, just deal with it. Who knows? You may like it later on.'' Onoki said with a smile, ''Kitsuchi, please hand her papers please.''

“If you couldn’t tell, I’m the wise old character who implies the future and foreshadows the most obvious events to come!”

I don’t like that they tried to put a political agenda into this. It just seems half-assed and said political plot device just seems like something that is obviously a means to replace the main cannon with a side character and will never get mentioned ever again.

What makes you think she’ll like it after she oh so expressively pointed out her distaste for leaving.

Complying (COMMA) Kitsuchi walks over to Kurotsuchi and hands her a folder containing her files that she was going to submit to Iwa's ninja academy. ''You and Chihiro give this to the Hokage when you get there. He'll know right away.''

Author’s thoughts on actual plot.

Grabbing her enrollment papers Kurotsuchi proceeded to look at it. Her name was written in the middle of the folder and contained her papers for her to enroll at Konoha's ninja academy. Looking at Onoki she asked, ''So am I going as an Iwa or Konoha academy student?”

Wait, hold up. You’re trusting the ten-year-old with the IMPORTANT paperwork?

Well seeing as you’re the granddaughter of the fucking leader of your village, I’m surprised he didn’t train you. What’s stopping her from tearing those up?

''Anyway you see fit dear. You could be an Iwa kunoichi living in Konoha and registered in their system but most likely you'll be wearing their headband.''

“Because reasons.”

Awful reasons.

''Ugh, just what I need, living there is punishment enough but wearing their headband is just gross.'' Kurotsuchi groaned

“I mean, it’s the same headband, but I can’t stand it because it’s ~Konoha~”

“Fucking tree huggers man.”

My, somebody just loves to bitch don’t they?

''At least you're a kunoichi regardless.'' Kitsuchi spoke up, ''When you graduate we will send you the Iwa shinobi outfit if you want or you can wear theirs.''

“At that point in the story, you’ll probably prefer Konoha anyway in some major character changing fashion.”

At this point you and Naruto have probably pulled and AngelXEmily.

Kurotsuchi just sighed in defeat.

SIIIIIIIISODEFEATEDIIIIIIIIIGH

SIIIIIIIEMOTIONSAREHARDIIIIIIIIGH

Suck it up buttercup.

''So when do I go there again?'' She asked

“Right now! In fact, I’m going to throw you out the window as a shortcut!”

Again as in you’ve been there before or asking for the time you leave?

''You leave tomorrow morning dear, you will be brought there by my assistant Chihiro. After you've met with the Hokage you're on your own pretty much.'' Onoki explained

“Bye, loser.”

Chichiro sounds like the best person.

Assistant Chihiro is best character.

Into the lion’s den we go.

''Yes, you should go get rest Kurotsuchi because you leave first thing in the morning.'' Kitsuchi added

They are really pushing her to leave.

Didn’t they say she was leaving in the morning not even two sentences ago?

Nodding with a sigh Kurotsuchi left to get some rest. ''Kurotsuchi wait.'' Onoki said getting the girl's attention ''What is it now gramps?'' ''Who knows? You might also meet a guy you'll like there.'' The Tsuchikage teased with a perverted grin

“Ohohoho! I like to think of my granddaughter meeting a nice boy but then have a perverted thought!”

“OHOHOHOHO-TOTALLYNOTFORESHADOWINGORANYTHING-OHOHOHOHO!”

Kurotsuchi blushed and quickly left the room much to the amusement of the two older men. Now alone in the room the two men began talking.

“Dammit grandpa, I can find a boyfriend by myself!”

“Oh no, my grandfather just basically told me to find a boy to fuck!”

''So you think this will really benefit us?-

“Fuck no!”

HAHHAHAHAH I SMELL A SUB-PLOT!

-I mean we do have the Hokage's grandson coming here as part of the exchange.'' Kitsuchi asked the elderly man

“What do we do with the grandson of our enemy?”

“KILL HIM”

Also, I get this is your father, but if you’re still in the office, talking about important village stuff, where the hell are the formalities?

''I'm sure, it's Hiruzen now so it should make the whole process of this exchange a whole lot easier and without me probably trying to attack the Yellow Flash in the face for what he did to us in the third war. And when you think about it Kumo, Suna and Kiri have been friendly with Konoha ever since they sent some of their shinobi there for the program.''

Hey! Quit dropping the exposition all over the place! Someone has to clean that up, and it’s not going to be me!

Yea, us. ʕʘᴥʘ✿ʔ

''If you say so Lord Tsuchikage. That traitorous bastard Deidara bombing us several weeks ago puts us in an even worse position.''

NAME DROP!

MORE SUB-PLOT!

''You are right, it's also best for her safety as well.'' Onoki said

“We’re sending her right into enemy territory! She’ll be perfectly safe!”

“Cos sending an Iwa nin to the village that is STILL RECOVERING FROM THE KYUUBI IS FUCKING A GOOD IDEA!”

Your plan makes no sense...at all.

-Konoha Main Gate, next morning-

*Eyetwitch* Those transitions… My favorite…

Yay awful transitions!

As the sun rises across Konohagakure (COMMA) two Chunin guarding the main gate awake from their unauthorized slumber. These two are Izumo Kamizuki and Kotetsu Hagane and they've been on guard duty for twenty days straight.

I mean, this IS their actual JOB!

They would be dead if they were on guard shift for twenty days straight, you will die from lack of sleep.

Nah, s’okay. They’re ninja.

''Ugh, Izumo wake up it's morning and time to begin another boring day as gate guards...'' Kotetsu groaned as he stretches himself

“This is how a casual conversation sounds. Wouldn’t you agree my fellow companion guard?”

“Undoubtedly, good sir!”

Nobody talks like this.

He reaches over and places a hand on Izumo's shoulder prodding the man awake. ''Yo, fucking let me sleep will you?'' Izumo grumbled

Are you the tsun to his dere?

Being rude upon being woken: +1 cliche point.

''Sure, then let Lord Hokage catch you and you'd be demoted to a Genin.'' Kotetsu shot back

One of the many responsibilities of the Hokage is to check on grunts like you.

Because the Hokage has the time to come and check on you idiots everyday. Also: Threat of boss demoting someone: +1 cliche point again! YAY Five more are you get a prize from the lower shelf!

You really have no idea what cliches are.

Nope! I just like giving points!

Right now we’ve got the tsundere, angst ridden teenager who whines about EVERYTHING cliche going on.

+5 Cliche points!

This served to wake Izumo almost instantly and the man quickly grabs his hygiene kit and began brushing his teeth, combing his hair and washing his face with a sink he made appear from God knows where.

Can’t be bothered to explain.

“Sorry I have lazy writing.”

This whole lack of explaining in some places and pretty much having dialogue that’s like watching paint dry in others, is making this fanfic to be like a raw, dead catfish. Cold, slimy and uninteresting.

''What the hell? Where'd that sink come from?!'' ''What you see is a genjutsu Kotetsu ooooooo!'' Izumo said trying to be scary

Correction: can’t be bothered to PROPERLY explain.

Correction: Let’s use every chance to say it was a ninja art of some kind.

Correction: completely butchering the english language.

''Shut the hell up and hurry up, we got another day of writing down traffic. Ugh, we always get stuck doing this shit.''

“Probably has something to do with the fact we’re background characters.”

What traffic? Cos the only motor vehicles are in the land of Snow. Do you mean Caravan traffic for trades?

5 minutes later..

Oh. Would you look at that… Another transition…

More lazy writing.

About a quarter mile out from the main gate we see the young Kurotsuchi and the Tsuchikage's secretary named Chihiro approaching the main gate.

Still don’t see anything.

FUCKING DESCRIBE SHIT DAMMIT!

It’s easier to get into the story’s scenery if you describe it a little bit.

Chihiro looked to face the young girl and saw that she was dawning an annoyed expression on her face. ''What's wrong Kurostuchi? Aren't you excited to visit another village let alone live in one for a while?'' She asked the young kunoichi to be

“I know you struggle to emote, but really…”

USE PERIODS!

She made her hate for Konohagakure very (not really) prominent in the very beginning. Did you just leave the room without anyone seeing you or did you not pay attention?

''No! I don't want to live in that poor excuse of a village. They're all murderers and deserve to be wiped out off the face of the Earth.'' Kurotsuchi shot back

What sort of brainwashing did you go through?

Obviously one of unreasonable hate toward a village instead of the one person who killed her mom.

“I don’t know who killed my mother so I’ll blame the whole village that is often called one of the most accepting!” Also, I don’t believe Naruto was ever said to take place on Earth, it was always called the Elemental Nations.

''Stop it, when are you going to understand that this is for our village's benefit? Do you not want us to at least be on friendly terms with Konoha or would you rather have the both of us hate each other forever and probably go to war again? You know we aren't in a position to fight another war Kurotsuchi, if another one broke out we would be annihilated. We've lost so many shinobi last time and we can't go through that again. Besides, think of it this way. You've already mastered your lava release correct?''

Another wall of dialogue. Do you think these characters are capable of performing actions while talking, or are they not advanced enough?

Yay! Wall of text! Cos everyone like those! Their like the floating heads in Rick and Morty.

Kurotsuchi nods at Chihiro's question.

''Then you can add the element of fire to your disposal to make you even more awesome. Fire is probably the most powerful element and from what I've heard has some really good jutsu for it. So that's a benefit for you.'' Chihiro finished

“Just a reminder, I’m doing this for a paycheck.”

“Because you’re a brat with poor character development even for a canon character!”

To make yourself more awesome? Seriously? Just because she has a Kekkei Genkai doesn’t mean that the main cast will like her, especially since she has a poorer attitude than Sasuke.

''And what other benefits are there huh?'' Kurotsuchi snorted

OINK OINK

SUUUUEWEEEE!

''Besides being educated and taught in fire release techniques, you'll also be trained by the best academy out of the five great nations. Konoha is well known for producing excellent ninja and they're no doubt the best trained as well. So there's that.'' Chihiro explained

If you do that, THEN you can crush them.

Crush them in your mighty Russian thighs.

Kurotsuchi's eyes turned into stars.

Jesus!

'She does have a point! I'm already awesome as it is but being trained by the best ninja...gross, I mean, being trained by Konoha's best is not too shabby at all. Learning fire release makes it even better too!'

“I’m too cool to acknowledge any sort of superiority from Konoha!”

“My ego is massive unlike my breasts!”

“My ego is compensation!”

Guys, she’s ten...

''Hey, we're here.'' Chihiro said snapping Kurotsuchi out of her thoughts, 'Huh?'

''I said we're here.''

Kurotsuchi looks towards her front and sees the main gate of Konohagakure, open and ready to accept whoever walks through them. She had to admit it gave off a friendly, warm and welcoming vibe which was something that she wasn't used to.

I am 99.999% confident she’ll still treat everyone like a piece of shit.

I’m pretty confident she’ll meet Naruto within the first chapter.

I’m pretty confident she’s going to pick a fight with every single one of them.

The two Iwa ladies then enter the gate and walk up towards the small checkpoint where Izumo and Kotetsu were.

''Hi, may I see your identification, papers, all those goodies?'' Izumo asked with a warm smile

All those goodies? That is extremely lame.

Waiting for the moment to stab a bitch. PLOT TWIST, Izumo is the true villain of this plot!

ʕงಠᴥಠʔง Wanna go bro?

Chihiro reaches for her I.D. and hands it to the Chunin. Looking at Kurotsuchi she raises her eyebrow prompting the young girl

RAGE

to hand Kotetsu her exchange papers. The two Chunin then take the time to look over the documents before nodding in satisfaction.

“Sorry ma’am, I’m afraid I need to stab you.”

“I’m to lazy to write Protagonist’s name so here’s a half assed nickname which is just her name shortened.”

''So I presume this young lady is part of the exchange program between our villages?'' Izumo asked handing the two ladies their documents ''Yes, young Kurotsuchi here will attend the academy.'' Chihiro replied with a smile

Sure, that’s what they all say!

Even though she’s said she’s already ‘good enough’.

''Just my luck...'' Kurotsuchi mumbled ''Oh come on little lady! The Konoha ninja academy is the best! We have amazing instructors and the student body is quite diverse as it is already! I think you'll meet some good kids your age you'd get along well with.'' Kotetsu inquired

“It’s not like we’re going to kill you like your mother!”

“Which I’m sure is going to somehow be used against you for plot!”

Whine, whine, whine, bitch, bitch, bitch. I bet you the author is going to stick her in Team 7 for no good reason.

''Yeah, whatever you say.'' The soon to be kunoichi groaned before receiving a tap on the back of the head from Chihiro

Main character despise all goodwill and warmth.

THE GOODWILL! IT BURNS!

This is Katherine all over again. DAMMIT! GET THE PAN!

''Heh, excuse her behavior she isn't feeling well this morning gentlemen! Would you be so kind to escort us to see the Hokage?''

Translation: “She’s being a bitch and embarrassing me. Can we go?”

Translation to translation: Little cunt needed to be aborted.

We’re right back to overly formal, just talk like a normal person please.

''Sure.'' Izumo said before clearing his throat, ''Oh ANBUUUUUUUUUUU!'' He shouted in a sing-song voice

Escorting your whiney ass is bad enough, don’t embarrass the poor guy but having him do a singsong voice in the middle of the road.

And like that (COMMA) two ANBU agents appeared before the four of them. ''Could you guys escort these ladies to see Lord Hokage? The little lady there is an exchange student from Iwagakure.'' Izumo explained.

You know that default icon you have when you don’t set your profile picture? That’s how I imagine all of these characters.

Y’know that feeling you get when you smell horseshit incoming? I’m getting that right now. OH WAIT! THIS WHOLE STORY IS BULLSHIT!

The two ANBU nod before motioning the Iwa ladies to follow suit. ''Man, she is a mean girl!" Kotetsu said once they were out of hearing range

Thank you Captain Obvious.

Holy shit! Someone who understands us! FINALLY!

More like she’s a mega bitch, who can’t stop whining about how she can’t stand Konahagakure’s inhabitants because one ninja killed her mom.

''She's from Iwa so it makes sense why she's acting like that so give the kid a break Kotetsu.'' Izumo said in a bossy voice

I’m sorry, what? Give the kid a break? No. She’s being rude to you for no valid reason.

“The readers would’ve needed to know the main plot line to understand anything that’s going on. I’d hate to be that guy.”

Author believes we can remember what happened 700+ episodes/mangas and ten movies ago.

''Well I sure hope she doesn't end up...killing some kids from our village considering that some bad blood still exists between us and them.''

On second thought, it probably wasn’t a good idea to let her in the village.

She’ll probably commit arson. Like the Kyuubi did. Too soon?

''I agree.'' Izumo concluded The two of them were left to sulk in depression as another day as gate guards begins.

HAHAHA DEPRESSION IS FUNNY.

HAHAHA LIKE MY ALCOHOLISM!

HAHAHA YOU SERIOUSLY NEED HELP!

-Hokage Tower-

I’m fine. Really.

Chihiro, Kurotsuchi and the two ANBU are seen walking up the staircase towards the Hokage's office. After a few more minutes (COMMA) they finally approach the large double doors where the office is.

Yay for poor descriptions!

Wow, these descriptions almost make me feel like I’m actually there.

''Here we are, please go ahead and enter.'' One of the ANBU said ''Thank for your escort.'' Chihiro said

Nodding, the two ANBU then shunshin leaving the two ladies alone. Chihiro then bent down to where she was eye-level with Kurotsuchi. ''Now Kurotsuchi, I want you to be on your best behavior alright? For the love of Kami

Get it?! The Japanese word for God?! GET IT?!

Even though I’m sure Naruto has it’s own gods and legends right?

Stopderailingtheauthor’sjokewithyourfacts.

don't start anything with any of the young Konoha shinobi, don't pick fights and please don't insult the Hokage. That would be pretty bad since he knows the Tsuchikage's granddaughter is attending the shinobi exchange program.''

“He will have you shot.”

''I can't guarantee that Chihiro-san, my temper and arrogance gets the best of me sometimes so whatever I do you can blame the brats who pushed me.'' Kurotsuchi snorted

“I’m a cool teen that does whatever I want without any consequences! It’s their fault for crossing me!”

Jesus, it’s Sasgay.

Sasuke has a better attitude than her.

''YOUNG LADY.'' Chihiro shouted as her eyes glow red sending waves of killer intent towards the little girl

Good job reprimanding her by reminding her that she is, in fact, a young female.

''Ung!''

A+ dialogue.

Sounds like the name of a character from Dawn of the Croods.

Way to make her sound constipated.

''You're our representative for this program, since we are so low on shinobi we can only send you and you seriously better behave! Make Iwagakure look good you hear me? Most importantly, make Lord Tsuchikage look good.''

You’re really expecting her to understand something like that? I thought better of you Assistant Chihiro.

Assistant is expecting a lot of Shitty Protagonist.

I find it funny that she’s expecting her NOT to mess this up.

Kurotsuchi knew she was right, she can't screw up and now she had to throw away her hatred of Konoha aside if she wanted to even be a kunoichi. ''Fine, I understand Chihiro-san. I promise to behave.'' Kurotsuchi sighed with honesty in her words

“Even though I don’t really. I’ll probably spend most of the story making this a living hell for just about everyone here.”

“I don’t give a shit about anyone.”

“I’m just gonna throw a tantrum and make everyone's life hell until they get sick of me and send me home.”

Chihiro smiled, maybe Kurotsuchi would pull through and get through the ninja academy without causing any problems. Getting up she balls her hand into a fist ready to knock on the door.(SPACE)''Ready Kurotsuchi? She asked turning to look at the girl

“Even if you’re not, I’m still going to knock anyway.”

YAY PLOT!

''Yes.'' Chihiro then knock on the door three times as loud as she could. The two of them were greeted with silence

Oh, hey silence! How’s it going? Creeping in stories with ridiculous prose I see!

Silence, why did you leave us with wall texts!?

before a voice spoke. ''Come in.''

So descriptive.

Chihiro then grabs the door(ONE WORD)knob and turns it opening the door and they enter the office. Closing the door behind them Chihiro turns to face the Hokage and the two of them were greeted by an elderly man Kurotsuchi guessed was the same age as the Tsuchikage. He had a warm smile on his face and was smoking a pipe.

Ah, you look like an asshole. Not because of your nonexistent character description, but because you’re from ~Konoha~.

Cos all old people with pies are assholes.

''Ah, are you the two lovely ladies from Iwagakure? I am Hiruzen Sarutobi and I am the Hokage of Konohagakure no Sato.'' He welcomed

No, just no. Be consistent with your naming. This makes your writing look sloppy jumping between the english dubbed name and the full japanese name of the village.

Kurotsuchi is no lady with how she acts. She’s acting like a spoiled brat. Jesus this IS Katherine.

''Yes, I have brought young Kurotsuchi here to attend your academy as part of the Shinobi Exchange on behalf of the Tsuchikage.'' Chihiro explained

You should have already known that, but I’m not going to say anything about it.

I’ve given up on the plot.

This political motive is still lame.

Smiling, the Hokage looks at Kurotsuchi. The girl was a bit apprehensive but when she saw that his eyes had a look of calm and kindness in them she sighed in relief.

Because she wasn’t trained enough to keep her guard up no matter what just by looking in someone's eyes.

“Stop being so nice to me and let me hate you!”

“Let me be an angsty bitch that hates the entire village for no good reason.”

“My mother IS dead, but I blame the whole place.”

''Hm, and do you have your files? Any important documents you will need to enroll in our academy young Kurotsuchi?''

Again, you trusted the ten-year-old with the important paperwork.

Nodding, Kurotsuchi takes her file out of her pack and walks up to the elderly man. Taking it from the girl Hiruzen then proceeds to look over her enrollment papers that came with the packet. Nodding in satisfaction he then places the papers on his desk.

And the plot continues at a snail’s pace.

There was a plot?

''Well then, your grandfather must really want you to be part of the program. I'll gladly mail this to the academy headmaster and you will receive a letter in the mail that will confirm your acceptance.'' ''Thank you Lord Hokage.'' Kurotsuchi said politely as she bows

“But not really. I still fucking hate your guts.”

I called it when she was gonna start going soft the moment she came here.

She’s the angsty teen character, that's exactly what’s going to happen.

''Haha, no need for formalities young lady, today I'm feeling very jolly so just call me Hokage-sama okay?''

Which is still formal.

First time you use formalities correctly is when you say don’t use them. GAH!

San would be more casual than sama. Just saying.

''Oh, okay Hokage-sama.'' Kurotsuchi chuckled

“I still hate you and everyone in this village. Now quit being nice and let my hate fester.”

''Ahem, now I will give you your address to the apartment complex you will live in with the other village exchange students. Don't worry about not being guarded because I have ANBU guarding the apartment 24/7 just in case anyone dares to try and attack children from other villages. Your safety is our utmost concern.'' Hiruzen said with a smile

“This isn’t effective anywhere outside the apartments so you’re pretty much on your own everywhere else. Pretty counter-intuitive, right?”

“Even though this is the first time we’ve done exchanges with ninjas.”

He then takes a pen and writes down the address to the complex before handing it to Kurotsuchi. ''There you go, that will be all. So do you have anything else to say before I send you off?''

Now would be the time to request bail.

-Prepares ceremonial noose-

''Nothing here for me to say Lord Hokage, thank you for having Kurotsuchi here in your village. I'm sure Lord Tsuchikage would be pleased.'' Chihiro said with a bow ''No problem, will that be all?'

“Yeah, can I punch you since I hate you?”

The two Iwa ladies shake their heads in response before Hiruzen dismissed them. They proceed to leave the tower and make their way towards the front entrance of the building. Chihiro bends down to Kurotsuchi's level to bid her farewell. ''Well Kurotsuchi, this is where I have to leave you dear. You going to be okay on your own?'' She questioned

In other words, you’re not going to fuck up, are you?

I sense future fucking up.

''Yeah yeah, I'm a big girl now so don't stress out. I'll find my way to the complex.'' Kurotsuchi answered with confidence

“I’m a big kid now!”

“I wear huggies!”

“I’m sooooooo gonna get lost.”

''Good, be on your best behavior and we'll see you at graduation.'' Kissing her on the forehead Chihiro then waves good-bye before walking off and disappearing into the crowd.

Well, that was awkward.

“I don't have to deal with your ass anymore, BYE BITCH!”

Kurotsuchi then looks at the paper with the address on it and begins making her way there.

How does she magically know her way around?

-Apartment complex, 1 hour later-

Hahahaha. You must really like those FUCKING transitions. Hahahaha...

FUCK YOU!

Kurotsuchi spent over an hour looking for her apartment complex but it was no easy task. She got lost five minutes after she began her search. 'Man! Konoha is no doubt the largest village of them all! I never got lost in Iwa like this before.'

“It has nothing to do with the fact that I lived in Iwa up to this point!”

“KONOHA SUCKS! BUT I LIKE HOW BIG IT IS!"

That’s because genius you lived there your entire life, this is new territory.

Walking into the door she shows the front desk receptionist her exchange papers and receives the key to her apartment. Thanking the receptionist (COMMA) she then makes her way up to the third floor where her apartment is.

Wow~ So descriptive~!

How much do you bet this is the complex Naruto lives at?

I bet all of Jack Sparrow’s rum.

''Let's see...C-1, C-2, Ah! Here is apartment C-3.'' Taking her key she unlocks the door and opens it. She was greeted to cool air to which she sighs in relief. 'Wow! The A.C. is already on!' She thought as she walks into the living room.

Turns out her apartment is a giant white box. No furniture or anything.

Just an A.C.

Setting her pack on the desk in the kitchen she notices an envelope and a note on the table for her. Picking it up she opens the envelope and finds over $500,000 for food shopping and other necessities that she may need later on.

In AMERICAN? THEY USE JAPANESE MONEY DUMBASS!! ALSO! THAT MUCH IN FOOD?! FOR ONE PERSON!?

IT’S CALLED YEN, YOU FOOL. THEY DON’T EVEN USE YEN IN NARUTO ANYWAY. *ahem* Needless to say, she has to be a heavy eater or else she won’t pair well with her ~love interest~

Taking the note she reads it, Dear Kurotsuchi,

This is a letter from me, Hiruzen Sarutobi and I just wanted to let you know I am glad that you have decided to attend the Konoha ninja academy on behalf of your grandfather Tsuchikage Onoki and the exchange program to help improve relations between our two nations. In the envelope if you haven't opened it yet contains enough ryo to last you the entire four years you will be in the academy. Please spend it wisely on things you will need such as food, clothes, hygiene and cleaning products. Do not worry about bills because the power, water and other household utilities are free as part of being in the program. Once again I thank you and welcome you to Konohagakure no Sato and I hope you enjoy your stay and your future career as an Iwa kunoichi in service to Konoha. -Hiruzen Sarutobi, the Third Hokage

He seems to really like bending over backwards for these exchange students.

Couldn’t you at least have made the letter a different text like italics?

No, that would be too much work.

Smirking,

“Ha, that’s right! You’re my bitch!”

“I WON’T SPEND THE MONEY WISELY!”

Kurotsuchi puts the letter aside and opens her fridge to find it stocked up! ''Holy crap! The old man planned ahead huh?'', Looking into the fridge's shelves she spots several frozen meats, Sriracha sauce, frozen yogurt, dumpling recipes and various fruit juices. Peeking at the top of the fridge she spots two gallons of water and two 24-packs of water bottles stacked atop one another. Moving onwards towards the counter she sees cooking utensils placed neatly and orderly. Taking a chair (COMMA) she climbs onto the counter-top and opens up the shelves and sees various cooking ingredients such as salt, pepper and everything you would want.

You take the time to describe this, but nothing else?

Cos food is priority apparently.

Obviously.

''You know, maybe being here wouldn't be THAT bad..'' She whispered to herself

You only think this because you don’t have to work for any of that.

Fat bitch.

She then proceeds to unpack her bag and takes out a fresh pair of clothes to shower. Thirty minutes later she exits the shower and jumps onto the couch in the living room. ''The couch feels nice, much better than those old ones back home.''

“My bastard grandpa was right! I do like it better here!”

Wow. -__- Guess you forgot your mother’s death. But I’m sure it’ll come back up for plot.

She’ll probably meet her killer and kill them to avenge her mother, knowing our luck.

Deciding that sitting and laying would be boring she decided that she might as well go out and explore the village a little since it's better to know it now than later so she doesn't get lost. Getting up she then heads out the door and begins her self(HYPHEN)tour of the village.

Silly nugget. Didn’t you forget you got lost?

Apparently yes.

She has the attention span of a goldfish.

-Konoha Streets-

HahahaHAHAHAHAHA. I’m going to end you.

ʕ╯°ᴥ°ʔ╯FUCK IT!

After over two hours of walking through the village and finding where the food, shinobi and clothing stores were she was starting to feel hungry and thought it would be a good idea to get some lunch. Checking her little watch (COMMA) she saw that it was around one in the afternoon. ''Hm, I wonder if this dump has any good places worth eating at.''

Yes, this ‘dump’ is more put together and reformed than your dump you call home as stated in the first couple of paragraphs.

Even after being raveged by a giant fox. (I mean their repairs are kind shoddy in some places)

Well according to this, they did get bombed several months prior, so the dumpiness has to be stated twice.

She said as she stops to take a quick look around. One stand catches her eye. A ramen stand that had a sign sporting the words 'Ichiraku Ramen!'. ''Well I guess ramen will do since it looks relatively friendly and cheap.'' She said to herself as she walks up to the shop.

“Still a dump though.”

“Still hate it here. Just like the food.”

Taking a seat (COMMA. YOU REALLY LIKE GERUNDS, I SEE) she notices that the stand only had about twelve seats and was really small but had a really nice and friendly atmosphere to it. She spots a girl with brown hair who appeared to be a year older

Your powers of observation are lacking and at the same time are sharp enough to tell the minute age gap between you and an absolute stranger.

Semi-All knowing MC.

than her cleaning the dishes while an older man in his mid-thirties was seen prepping the broth for the noodles. She sat there silently before the girl spotted her.

Speak dammit, I get you’re from the land of ROCKS, but you are not a ROCK! AAAAAAAGH!

I know you have the emotional capacity of a potato, but the least you can do is use your words instead of awkwardly sitting there.

Sitting around and being awkward is the best social interaction dontcha know?

''Hi! Welcome to Ichiraku ramen! What can I get you?'' The girl said in a very cheerful tone ''Oh, um this is my first time here... (CAPITALIZE)actually this is my first time in this village so I don't really know what you have..'' Kurotsuchi replied

Well, ramen for starters.

There weren't ramen stands at your home? You know, literally the cheapest meal ever besides crackers. ALSO READ THE MENU BITCH!

''I think I can guess why you haven't been here before young lady. It's because you're in the shinobi exchange program (COMMA) right?'' The older man said without looking at her

That man must be a mindreader!

MORE ALL KNOWING CHARACTERS!

''Erm, yeah that's why. I'm from Iwagakure.''

And as such I show no emotion. Beep boop. Kill all humans.

Beep boop. KILL ALL OF KONOHA. Beep beep boop.

I am a robot. Beep bop beep boing.

''Iwa huh? Never met anyone from there before so it's a pleasure! I'm Teuchi and this fine little lady here is my daughter Ayame.'' Teuchi introduced with a bow ''Nice to meet you!'' Ayame greeted ''Kurotsuchi, likewise.''

“I lack a last name because it makes me cool.”

“You’re not cool enough to know my last name.”

''You know since it's your first time here I'll give you a free bowl on the house.'' Teuchi said as he dumps some ramen into the broth to cook

Great business, give the little whore a free bowl just cos she’s new. Gold star!

Shut it, that’s a good strategy to get the little bitch to show up again!

-,,,,- This does not please Zoidberg.

''I mean, if you insist that is.'' Kurotsuchi shrugged

“I have the emotional capacity of exactly half of a teaspoon.”

That’s not very much.

''Hey it's on the house!''

“So, you’ll spend money here, right?

''Oh fine. Thanks anyway.''

I’m sorry, but the command “gratitude” is currently unavailable. Please try again later.

Thankful.exe has stopped working.

After about five minutes another person comes into the stall and takes a seat two stools away from Kurotsuchi. Looking out the corner of her eye she could make out a boy with spiky blonde (BLOND) hair about her age. Turning to face him completely she saw that he had blue eyes and whisker marks on his cheeks that made him look a bit feral.

I FUCKING CALLED IT!

After the last story, the word “feral” gives me PTSD

This feral enough?

I will bury you alive (ʘ‿ʘ✿)

I’m taking the rum with me.

''Oh! Daddy, Naruto is here!" Ayame shouted in glee

I read this as ‘Daddy naruto’ oh god.

''Get him his usual!'' Teuchi called out The blonde (BLOND IS FOR MALES, BLONDE IS FOR FEMALES) boy sat there with a huge smile on his face. Noticing the girl sitting close to him he turns his head and looks her way. The two lock eyes for a moment before Naruto gave her his trademark grin then turning away.

Despite never being to the village before nor meeting the main character, she knows exactly what his trademark grin is.

Bruh… She’s back to all knowing again.

There was something about the look in his eyes that got Kurotsuchi curious. While his eyes and smile displayed happiness Kurotsuchi saw a sense of loneliness and depression.

Oops, your all knowing narrator syndrome is showing again.

Goddammit, even Jacob was this all knowing.

Of course you’re curious, you want something to compare to.

''Hiya! I'm Naruto! You can send the love letters later, nice to meet you!" The blonde (BLOND) greeted with his foxy grin as he looks back at her

You can send the love letters later? Seriously, that is way out of character for him.

That right there is the epitome of a lady killer. Figuratively and maybe literally.

Why is NOBODY saying their last names when meeting each other!?

''Uh, yeah..'' She said as a bowl of ramen was placed in front of her, 'Oh dang, that actually looks really good!'

“I was expecting a piece of trash from a trash town!”

“I hate this stupid trash town and its stupid trash people.”

Did you just expect disgusting slop or something?

''Enjoy!'' Ayame said before giving the blonde (BLOND) his bowl. ''Thanks Ayame!'' He shouted as he goes to devour his bowl in 2.5 seconds

Exactly. Not a second more.

He doesn’t even eat that fast in the actual manga and anime. ʕ>ಠᴥಠʔ> ======= O

Evidently we must over exaggerate how fast the boy can eat.

Kurotsuchi was taking her second bite when she looked at the boy and her eyes nearly rocketed out of her sockets. That blonde (BLOND) had already eaten twelve bowls while she was only on her second bite!

Pretty sure he would have choked. Which might have been preferable given who the love interest is.

You know what Kuro’s gonna choke on later? ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ Naruto’s salami.

Che?

*pat pat* When you’re older Coffee.

'Holy crap, how the heck does he do that? No human on earth can eat that fast!' She thought with a deadpan expression

Dead like her mother.

(ಥ﹏ಥ) Dead like my will to live.

Another five minutes would go by and when Kurotsuchi got halfway through her bowl she turned and looked and saw over twenty more empty bowls stacked up beside the boy.

Is he just allowed to do that? Eating that much ramen costs a bit. It’s a business, not a charity.

I know Naruto eats ramen A LOT, but he doesn’t eat this MUCH DAMMIT!

Good lord you take forever to eat.

'This guy doesn't hold back when it comes to eating huh?'

Nope.

Picking up the pace Kurotsuchi devours her bowl just as Naruto finished bowl number twenty-two. Burping he turns to look at the girl giving her a grin. ''I see you trying to eat as fast as me huh? Think you can do better?'' He asked

Of course she does! She’s the main character!

Cos MC’s can do anything!

Kurotsuchi just scoffed before a second bowl was placed in front of her. With the utmost efficiency (COMMA.) she managed to devour it in five seconds much to Naruto's surprise.

You are paying for that one, right?

“I’ve never done this before or eat eat ramen at all but watch me down this shit like beer!”

''Haha! That was fast but not fast enough!'' Naruto said as another bowl was placed in front of him and to Kurotsuchi's surprise he ate it in literally a quarter of a millisecond.

Chewing is no longer a necessity. He just unhinges his jaw and devours it whole. The bowl included.

She’s gonna win, I just know it. Or she loses and follows Naruto to his home.

''What the?!'' She said Setting the bowl down the blonde (HAVE I MADE MY POINT YET?)turns to face the girl with his supposed signature grin. ''Think you can top that girly?'' He questioned

But of course she’s gonna.

“Girly?”, Naruto doesn’t call anyone girly, you’re letting his OOC show again.

With a tic mark forming on her head she pounds on the counter and screams ''Third bowl! Now!"

“MY PRIDE IS AT STAKE HERE! I CAN’T LOSE TO THIS TRASH PERSON FROM THIS TRASH TOWN.”

“MUST WIN AT SOMETHING I’VE NEVER DONE BEFORE!”

''Here you go!" Teuchi said Grabbing the bowl and putting it against her face she proceeds to devour it at a speed that was considered inhuman that even Naruto was once again taken by surprise. 'I won't lose! Kurotsuchi always wins because I'm the best!' Two hours later..

Oh lookie… A time skip. This stand’s out of business by now.

FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF-

After over two hours having a ramen eating contest

Really? Two hours have passed? Are you sure? I know you told us in that God-awful transition, but just got to be certain.

neither of them were aware of the two of them had eaten a total of one-hundred bowls each and now they were on their last bowls as their little stomachs were on the verge of exploding.

Fucking really? If Naruto’s draining bowls in 2.5 seconds he’d be beyond 100 in TWO FUCKING HOURS!

They had to stop before the bill became even more outrageous. Which I hope they’re paying for.

They’re not going to and we all know it. She has to win because “she’s the best.”

''I...I won't lose to you (COMMA) blondie.'' Kurotsuchi moaned as she takes her chopsticks and takes a bite of some ramen

Bet this won’t be the only time she moans around Naruto. ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ wink wink nudge nudge

SCROTAL PUNCH!

NOOOO! (ಥ﹏ಥ)

You kinda should have expected that.

''Y..yeah sure...I'm a natu-*Burp* (THAT IS NOT HOW YOU WRITE DIALOGUE)-ral at this..'' Naruto groaned as he tries to take one last bite but before he could put the ramen in his mouth his head slumps forward and lands on the counter. His body seemingly unconscious.

I think he might be dead.

*pokes the body with a stick* nope he twitched, still alive.

Can’t kill Love Interest off, whose MC gonna use a pillow to cry on when she remembers Dead Mama?

''Yes!'' Kurotsuchi shouted with her arms raised

Of course she fucking won. -__-. RAMEN IS LITERALLY ALL NARUTO CAN AFFORD FOR A MEAL! BESIDES SPOILED MILK!

Teuchi and Ayame couldn't help but laughed at the two children.

“I can’t wait so see their faces when I show them the bill.”

Considering Asian currency is often a much lower value, I’ll say the ‘500,000’ is actually more so around a much lower amount in American, so she wasted it all on ramen. TWO HOURS OF TWO AND A HALF SECOND BOWLS OF RAMEN FROM A SHITTY STAND!

He gave her enough for four years, she not running out for awhile.

Fun fact, one US dollar is equal to ten ryo, the official currency in Naruto. Also there are 3600 seconds in an hour. So eating 2.5 seconds consistently for two hours gets about 2880 bowls. Average ramen at a shop like this one costs usually no more than 500 yen (50 ryo). This get’s you about 144,000 ryo ($14,000). And that’s just accounting for one of them, not counting the bowls that Naruto had devoured before starting this competition.

Lucky for them, the writer had mentioned it was only 100 bowls a piece. So instead of that number it’s more like 5000 ryo ($500) per person. Which is still expensive.

But that doesn’t make since, if it’s only one hundred bowls, that means they must’ve slowed down A LOT to make that amount, together, in two hours. Also: Why didn’t the owner stop them. Surely they just ate most of his stock for the day.

''Aaaaaand I believe the winner is the young Iwa exchange student!'' Teuchi declared while Ayame applaud, ''Congrats! Looks like Naruto has a rival!'' ''W-whatever...''

“I-It’s not like I like you or anything! B-Baka!”

AHAHAHHAHA. Get out.

Kurotsuchi said as she devours her last bowl before she performs a hand seal for a technique that allows her full stomach to immediately digest all the food.

That’s cheating!

(ಥ﹏ಥ) Really?

''There, all better, thanks for the food old guy!'' Kurotsuchi says as she takes off

“I’m not gonna pay for it, What’s-Your-Face.”

She keeps her money, like the little slut she is.

Checking her watch she saw that it was about five in the evening and decided to go look around for the training fields. After thirty minutes of searching she found the Third Training Field where she hoped she could practice some moves in peace away from the bustling village. She enters the field and the sight was quite nice compared to the Iwa training fields. It was in the middle of a small forest with a large river cutting through the middle of it that led to a lake a quarter mile away.

Lookie Coffee! No transitions!

Truly a marvelous day.

Oh, happy day!

''Huh, I guess this place is somewhat nice.'' She said to herself before taking out a small scroll from her small pack and focuses some chakra-

HOLY SHIT! FIRST TIME CHAKRA WAS MENTIONED! HOLY FUCK!

It’s a miracle, actual show related stuff is being described! 0_0

- into her hand. Placing it on the scroll a sword materializes and she unsheathes it and begins practicing some Kendo techniques for over a few hours before deciding to head back to her apartment.

Well, the descriptiveness didn’t last long.

-Shopping District of Konoha, the same night-

Yeah, no. Everything is fine. EvERYTHING IS FUCKING DANDY. I’M NOT MAD. WHY THE FUCK WOULD I BE MAD?

FUCK! I HAD TO SAY SOMETHING!

IT IS OFFICIALLY YOUR FAULT FOR THIS.

Yep, gif sums it up.

NO IT DOESN’T. THAT DOESN’T EVEN SCRATCH THE SURFACE.

It was around eight at night now and Kurotsuchi was walking the now semi quiet streets of Konoha.

Descriptions are top-notch as usual. (Read as lacking)

As the Cromulons would say: DISQUALIFIED!

She was glad she was walking home at this time because during the day Konoha was jam packed with people moving around making it pretty challenging to walk the streets. Since it was eight now traffic had died down about 40% making travel much easier.

40% precisely, based on what she only saw that one day.

All-Knowing Syndrome is back.

She continued walking until she heard a huge commotion up the street and saw a mob of sorts doing what she believed was chasing someone.

Taking bets now. $50 says it’s her love interest.

$40 on it being Chihiro.

''Huh, who pissed those guys off?'' She whispered to herself, ''Oh well, none of my business.''

Oh boy, villagers chasing someone at night, who ever could it be. -__-. +100 points for using originality.

She was about to turn the other direction when she heard what sounded like a child shout in pain, ''What the hell?'' She said before running towards the mob.

Chronic Hero Syndrome +50.

As she was approaching the mob she heard various sentences being said. ''Kill the demon!''

Yep, it’s Love Interest. -hands Coffee 50 bucks- Dammit.

I’ll take that!

''You will pay for what you did all those years ago!’’

Mob mentality of course -.-.

+2 points for great speech. -__-

''Time to die!''

Sooooo original. -___-

Oh no, not Naruto! The true MC!

Quickly, save your love interest even though you supposedly hate this town and everyone in it!

She made her way directly behind the mob and spotted a mix of shinobi and villagers carrying various weapons such as pitchforks, katanas, kusarigamas and torches.

+50 points for having professionally trained shinobi join in instead of stopping.

This is some Frankenstein-esque shit.

This is unoriginal. I see it in NEARLY EVERY DAMN NARUTO FANFIC!

Peaking (PEEKING) through the gaps of their legs (COMMA AND STOP ABUSING GERUNDS) she saw someone familiar. It was that blonde (NO E UNLESS NARUTO IS A LADY) Naruto kid from the ramen stand! The boy was in a fetal position cowering in fear before the mob.

“We are strangely prone to violence here!”

I mean if he’s ten and has this many adults wanting to beat him up, I can’t blame him.

The problem here is that the adults didn’t join in the beating, they just verbally berated him. It was the kids and teenagers that beat the hell out of him.

''These idiots are picking on some kid?

And how old are you, kid?

TEN! LIKE HIM! YOU CAN’T DO SHIT! LEAST KATHERINE HAD A PAN! I MEAN PLAN!

Well I'll show them who's boss!...Wait...I'll only cause a problem if I attack anyone from here..damn.'' She said to herself, ''Guess I'll just save the blondie and get out of here.''

You guess. It’s the only way to move the plot forward.

This is the part where you get creative and not just wing it.

Save him so you can get that sweet smoked salami later ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

With that Kurotsuchi then hops over the mob and lands in between them and the blonde (IS HE A LADY?) holding her hand protectively in front of Naruto.

Who even is Kurotsuchi? Like I do not remember her at all. Never mind, looked her up: She’s actually a nice looking character and nicely developed as a person. In This story? Not so much.

“For some reason I care about this particular piece of trash. If he’s dead, he can’t foot the bill!”

Feeling the presence of someone looming over him Naruto opens his eyes and spots a person standing in front of him separating him from the mob with their hand held in front of him as if protecting him. 'It's that girl from the Ichiraku's!' He thought recognizing the girl

Somewhere in the background, someone yelled, “One of you fuckers owes us a shit-ton of money!”

“And a new supply of ingredients!”

''Who the hell are you girl?'' One of the villagers asked

She ate more than the living black hole called Naruto.

''Why the heck are you picking on some kid? She replied

“He can’t pay his - definitely not mine- debt if he’s dead! Do you know how much he -not me- spent tonight?!”

Again MC goes back to being a heartless bitch, remembering the town is stupid and trash.

''Don't protect that demon spawn! He destroyed our village years ago and now we will destroy him and avenge our fallen comrades!'' One of the shinobi yelled

“It’s totally his fault for all of that!”

“Avenge our fallen comrades”, “He destroyed our village years ago and now we will destroy him”, “demon spawn” Nobody talks this formally anymore, get with the program.

“HE HAS WHISKERS! MUST BE ONE OF THEM THERE FURRY FELLAS!”

“That’s reason enough to kill him!”

''You're all scum for picking on a defenseless kid. Especially you (COMMA) shinobi! You're supposed to protect your comrades not hurt them let alone a poor child!" Kurotsuchi spat before one of the Chunin charged forth with a katana ready to cut Kurotsuchi down.

Somehow, they’re even worse trash than MC thought prior.

Better than ICP.

Seriously? They wouldn’t attack unless she presented herself as a threat you idiot.

What can I say? Author’s a dumbass.

'Oh man, just what I need.'

“Screw it! I don’t give a rat’s ass about my village’s reputation! Just as long as I can satisfy my BLOODLUST.”

“I don’t care if my grandpa, who's my leader, gets mad at me!”

Kurotsuchi took her katana-

Where the fuck did your katana come from?

You ask where thy magical sword is produced from? Her butt ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

Pulled straight from her ass.

Just like the author did when writing this shitfest.

and swung it with enough force to swat the Chunin's katana right out of his grip catching the man by surprise. ''What the?!'' He shouted before Kurotsuchi karate chopped his temple knocking him out cold. Chuckling in satisfaction she turns to face the crowd, ''So who's next?'' She said challenging the mob to try her

Haha, really hope no one takes her seriously… There’s no way an untrained student can take down multiple Chunin.

She’s the all powerful MC, of course she can take them all down. *heavy sarcasm*

Meh, I’m sure nobody is, maybe the chunin let her win to make her ego flare.

Just as she said that two more Chunin charged towards her with kunai in hand and like the one before she effortlessly dodged all their attacks and proceeded to knock one of them out before choking the other out cold. Tossing his body aside two villagers came at her and she performed a roundhouse kick knocking them both backwards against the nearby dumpster. After several more minutes of ass(TWO WORDS)kicking Kurotsuchi had managed to beat the mob leaving them beaten into unconsciousness. Naruto was just staring at her in awe.

Turns out they were a bunch of regular villagers. There were also apparently no guards or any form of security to prevent this. Kurotsuchi was sent back home in a bodybag.

Cos a small, untrained, child waving a big sword can defeat fully trained ninjas, and I’m sure there had to be at least ONE Jonin there.

Sooo I’m supposed to buy that she effortlessly beat up half the village, well trained shinobi and walked away without even a single scratch? Yeah, no. Not buying it.

Cracking her neck and her knuckles she lets out a sigh of content. ''Now that was worth the work out!''

You pulverized them with as much effort as it takes most of us to sneeze and you call it a work out.

Sad this is a canon character and the Author’s using her like a Mary Sue.

She declared before Naruto started speaking, ''Wow! That was so cool! I've never seen anyone kick butt like that! You are really good!'' The blonde (IS THAT WHAT YOU ARE IMPLYING?) declared

YES! MARVEL AT HER AWESOME POWER.

But don’t the villagers kick YOUR but like that? ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ

Turning to face the boy she couldn't help but smirk, ''I only beat them because shinobi in your village are weak, that's why they got what they got by a ten-year old like me. I'm awesome and they suck end of story.'' She boasted,

“I’m making this all up to impress you, even if you are a piece of trash! B-Baka!”

“I’m awesome and they suck, end of story.” Such… Oh fuck it I give up. Bring me the 50 year old scotch.

I can practically see the bubble that is her ego inflating.

Quick! Someone get a needle!

Did someone say needle? ʕ•ᴥ•ʔ I got some good fucking heroin for sale.

Nah, I’m good. I already have my coffee, the best kind of drug. (◕ヮ◕)

''So what did you do to make all these people want to kill you?'' ''Urm, well I never really did anything at all actually.'' He answered ''Suuuuuuuuuure.'' Kurotsuchi snorted,

I don’t know. He looks ten, but he has the eyes of a killer.

He’s a Yiffer, burn him. Oh god I just angered the Furries again.

She’s gonna learn the village secret here in the next few paragraphs I bet.

''Well it's getting late so you should head on home.'' She ordered as she handed him a handkerchief to clean off his bloody nose. ''Clean that blood off your face, you look like a mess.'' She ordered before she turns to hop over the rooftops. Just as she was about to hop Naruto reached out and grabbed her arm. ''Wait!'' Turning back Kurotsuchi shot an annoyed glare at the blonde (HE HAS A NAME YOU KNOW. OR IS IT SHE?) boy. ''What?''

“Don’t think I’ve forgotten about you skipping out of the bill!”

“OH! Sure I’ll pay it later” Never pays.

''W-what's your name?'' He asked

He’s probably going to send the bill straight to your address.

That’s what I’d do.

'Should I tell him my name or shouldn't I? Oh fine, I guess it wouldn't hurt. I mean it's only polite.' She thought

Even though politeness is something you also lacked the entire story up until now.

*coughs*bitch!*coughs*

''My name is Kurotsuchi.'' Smiling, Naruto gave her his trademark grin, ''I'm Naruto Uzumaki!'' He declared with a thumbs up. ''Um, you told me already but whatever.'' She said before hopping away

Shut your mouth! What happened to being polite?

But he didn’t tell you his LAST name tho! So there you go!

Naruto was left standing there in awe. ''She's cool...'' He mumbled to himself as a blush forms on his face

Figuratively and if I had my way, literally frozen in a block of ice to match her emotional depth.

I feel literally no connection between them. It’s AngelXEmily all over.

He then begins walking home towards his apartment complex. -Naruto's apartment complex-

You know what? Okay, fine. I’m not going to freak out about this. I will rip out your intestines and use them as a skip rope

/╲/\╭ ʕಥᴥಥʔ╮/\╱\ About time I scuttle outta here.

Naruto was making his way up the stairs of his apartment complex before coming up to his door. Reaching into his pocket he takes his keys and unlocks his door and enters it.

Descriptive descriptions are descriptive. Unlike this paragraph.

Unknown to him however that during his entire walk back to his apartment Kurotsuchi was watching him from the rooftops.

In an Edward Cullen-esque manner.

Watching him enter his apartment she then turns to head to hers. There was only one thought going through her mind.

/╲/\╭( ͡° ͡° ͜ʖ ͡° ͡°)╮/\╱\ Is that the ending I see? Has God came to save us?

Why was she feeling very caring towards him?

He’s the main character.

He’s the future love interest.

So that concludes the first chapter of my attempt at a NaruKuro story. I know it won't be perfect but I hoped you enjoyed regardless

Oh, hon. We know.

CONCLUSION

The plot was shaky at best. The amount of convenient plot devices were atrocious, much like your blatant gerund-abuse. The main character isn't very likable and was hardly like the canon character you were supposedly writing. Granted, there is room for development. Your writing was lacking in descriptiveness and commas. It was a boring read, end of story. It needs work, but it is still somewhat salvageable if you take the time and actually think it through 4/10

I rate this as a single gif. WHY!? BECAUSE YOU TOOK A GREAT CANON CHARACTER, MASHED THEM WITH YOUR OWN TEEN ANGST AND SHAT IT OUT AS IF SHE WERE SOME GODDAMN MARY FUCKING SUE OC! YOU SIR DISGUST ME! AND YOU’RE ATTEMPT AT A BLOOMING ROMANCE IS SHITTY! THE PLOTS SHITTY! EVERYTHING IS SHITTY! I SWEAR TO GOD IF I HAVE TO REVIEW EVEN A SECOND MORE OF THIS SHIT I WILL FIND YOU AND STRANGLE YOU LIKE HOMER STRANGLES BART FUCKING SIMPSON! I give you my ultimate rating:

I’m calm now, anyways, that about sums my thoughts, what about you Tea?

The dialogue is incredibly unrealistic, the plot is half baked, if not completely raw. This side character has no place in Konohagakure at all but yet here we are with some idiotic and unrealistic political element that makes no sense. I give this a 1/10.

-Coffee, Tea, and Jagerbomb

#bad fanfiction #naruto fanfiction #sporking #fanfiction review #obscure review

0 notes