#Space-time fuckery

[carlyraejepsans]

what the fuck ever

[anghraine]

My best friend and I moved in together with his closest friend from his MA program, and while I had met her before (the friend; my bff is a man), we hadn't spent much time together because I've never lived away from the West Coast (and only two years out of the PNW) and she's never lived outside of North Carolina and only briefly visited the PNW once, when she went to Portland last year.

It's been a delight to show her around the PNW and realize we need to explain things that are just sort of omnipresent in our lives. The bff and I were casually griping with each other about having to run an errand to Trader Joe's at an inconvenient hour, and were telling her, "it's okay, you can stay in the car and avoid the people if you want" and she was like "NO I MUST SEE IT, I'VE ONLY HEARD OF THEM" and nearly ascended to another plane when we showed her around the store.

The bff and I grew up in the same town in NW Washington (him for his first 18 years, me from 9 to 19) and he lived in Bellingham and Seattle for years before he went to NC for grad school (I went to the SF Bay Area for mine, a very different experience). Both of them are hardcore coffee aficionados, but he struggled with the different Coffee Ways of the South, so for the true PNW experience they want to tour various indie coffeeshops next.

Also, she adores Kaidan in Mass Effect and we were like, oh, is your passport up to date? We could take a trip sometime and show you your boyfriend's beloved English Bay. It's very beautiful :)

her: O_O

me: Actually, it's worth going to Vancouver BC for its own sake as well, it's truly spectacular. We used to go all the time as kids.

bff: And Victoria!

her: O_O

[noturlondonboy]

If Kate + Kate Makes Two… (Prt. 2)

-Bishova/Kate Bishop ¿Selfcest? Miniseries

Request and concept art images by @selfcestmovies

Masterlist

Pairing: Kate Bishop x Yelena Belova x Kate Bishop

Summary: Yelena takes the two Kates to visit Dr. Strange, who counsels with Wanda Maximoff and America Chavez about Kate’s predicament. However, they aren’t lucky enough to provide good news, and Kate is left feeling even more discouraged.

Warnings: angst, not proof read

A/N: another! Welcome Wanda and America, I missed you

The thick coat wrapped snugly around Kate’s body does absolutely nothing against the persistent chill in Dr. Strange’s spooky magic apartment- the saline sanctum or some shit, she was too freaked to remember or frankly even care- and pulling it closer to herself only serves to make her shiver harder.

“God, I hate it here,” she whispers weakly to herself, teeth chattering as her eyes dart around anxiously.

“Tell me about it,” her own voice says softly back.

Kate’s head whips to meet identical blue eyes, and she swallows thickly as her face pales for the millionth time that day. The Other Kate was walking a few feet behind her, with a very concerned Yelena between the two of them as they followed behind Dr. Strange. Kate doesn’t respond to her (to herself? What the fuck) and just turns back around to stare at the floor as they walk. She doesn’t see the flash of disappointment in Other Kate’s eyes (HER eyes) when she looks away.

“Strange? Where are we going?” Yelena calls out, her deep voice as irritated as it is worried. Kate finds herself shuffling closer to her girlfriend, (???) the blonde the only source of comfort she currently could find.

Yelena must notice her unease, because gentle fingers trail over her arm. They’re only there for a moment, however, before they disappear and the woman’s hand falls into that of Other Kate.

Kate swallows again, hugging herself tighter. Maybe the cold had nothing to do with her discomfort. Seeing her girlfriend view her with weary confusion was doing something mean to her heart, but then again, Kate can’t blame her. She still does a double take every time she looks back and sees a long golden braid and not the choppy cut she had been recently accustomed to.

But also, there was an exact duplicate of herself back there, too, so, y’know. What the fuck’s all around.

“Run me by exactly what happened, again?” the sorcerer finally says, his voice interrupting the panicked spiral Kate had been sinking into as he glances at her. He leads them into a long hallway and then into a side room with high pillars and bookshelves lining the walls, and Kate has to take a moment to adjust to the dim lighting.

“Well,” she mumbles, tugging anxiously at the coat on her shoulders, “I got home. Um. Everything seemed pretty normal for the most part at first. But then different things kept popping out at me.”

“Like what?” Strange doesn’t look back at her again, his magic pulling several books from the walls and hovering them down to him.

“I’m used to the cupboards being pretty well stocked, but they were a little pathetic,” the archer says, laughing weakly. There’s a soft noise of complaint from Other Kate behind her, but it’s quickly hushed by Yelena. “And the furniture was back to its old arrangement.”

She leaves out the part about her devastation when discovering the Stone Age Animal Crossing island.

The sorcerer hums to himself as he leads through books, his mouth a thin line. “This sounds like a pretty simple problem,” he eventually says, his eyes finding Kate’s. “This isn’t the first time I’ve seen people get a little misplaced in time like this.”

“So you think it’s time travel?” Yelena speaks up, her voice weary. “Why didn’t just her brain do the traveling?” The blonde stops and looks between the two Kates. “Does that make sense?”

Strange doesn’t give any of them a chance to respond before he’s opening up another book. “In most cases of singular personnel time travel, you would be correct, Yelena. The conscious awareness would be the only thing aware of any change. Usually, we don’t end up with double of someone unless there were outside forces pulling some strings.”

Kate can feel her head throbbing, and she presses a hand to her eyes as they ache in her skull. “I don’t fucking understand. Someone else pulled some shit and space-timed me out of place, or something?”

“Or something,” Other Kate mutters under her breath, shifting nervously on her feet. Yelena’s hand twines with hers again. Kate bites back against the bitterness in her throat.

“Alright, keep telling me what happened,” Strange beckons, his eyes darting over the pages of several different books as they float in the air above him.

Kate swallows. “Ok, well… Yelena got back to the apartment, and I freaked out, because she suddenly had long hair again, and then I had to sit down because I was freaking out more, and then another me walked through the door.”

“And she passed out,” Yelena adds, incredibly unhelpfully.

Kate shoots her a look, but she wilts when she sees the weariness in the assassin’s eyes. God, she would give anything to curl up in bed right now and sleep all the confusion away.

Dr. Strange nods and hums to himself. “I’m going to call on Wanda and America and we’ll figure something out. In the meantime, Kate, Yelena, you need to keep her in your line of sight at all times.”

Kate opens her mouth to comment but stops when the two women behind her mutter their agreements, and Kate turns to look at them with a puzzled expression. “Wait, me? I don’t need to be babysat.”

“You’re the anomaly here,” Strange says simply, shrugging as his magic swirls around him. He disappears through a sparking portal without another word, and Kate stares at where he had been just moments before.

“What the actual fuck,” she mutters to herself, rubbing her hands down her face. Nothing but silence greets her back, and when she glances at Yelena and Other Kate, they’re watching her with a sense of unease and confusion.

“This isn’t a fucking zoo, you can stop staring,” Kate mumbles weakly, her shoulders drooping as the situation seems to really hit her. She lets out a breath and sinks down to the door against a pillar, resting her head between her knees and wrapping her arms over her neck.

There are soft whispers and some shuffling from the two others in the room, and after a moment, a soft hand rests on her knee. The archer glances up with tired eyes, meeting Yelena’s gaze.

“Are you alright, Kate Bishop?”

The familiar title has tears building in the back of her throat, and Kate shakes her head as her lips press into a thin line. “I’m scared,” she admits, her voice breaking.

Yelena’s eyes are kind, and they ease some of the tension in Kate’s chest. “This feels like the kind of thing you’d be all over,” she says softly, her head tilting. A few feet away, Other Kate is nodding slowly, her expression thoughtful.

“I know, right?” Kate laughs tearfully, pressing a palm to her eyes as they start to leak. “I’ve always been so interested in space-time shit. I just never thought I would actually see it happen to me. And just the fact that I don’t remember how or why it happened… I don’t know.”

Yelena squeezes her knee gently. “I’m sure we’ll be able to figure out what happened and get you back to where you belong.”

Kate stares at the blonde for a moment before a humorless chuckle sounds in her throat. “This is so fucking weird. I want to kiss you, because you’re my girlfriend, but at the same time you’re not.”

“Yeah, that’s gotta feel weird,” the Other Kate mutters, her eyebrows scrunched. Yelena nods in agreement and purses her lips.

“What’s your Yelena like?” the Yelena in front of her asks, head tilted to the side. “Is she much different? Is your universe completely changed, or is it just older?”

“It’s just older, from what I can tell,” Kate says quietly, feeling grateful for the excuse to talk about her girlfriend. To… herself. And… her girlfriend?

Jesus Christ.

“You, um… she…? You have shorter hair. You got it cut just recently.” Kate smiles weakly and rubs at her eyes. “It’s really pretty.”

Yelena’s cheeks go a little pink, and at the same time, Other Kate looks down at her girlfriend with a soft whistle. “You would look super good with short hair, babe,” she agrees.

“She does.” Kate and Other Kate share a smile for the first time, and Yelena glances between the two of them.

“Strange better figure out how to send you back,” the blonde mutters, and both archers give her a puzzled look. She rolls her eyes and stands, brushing her knees off. “I can barely handle one Kate Bishop. How am I supposed to live with two of you constantly trying to charm me?”

That makes Kate’s heart feel a little lighter, but at the same time, the worry that’s been growing in the back of mind pulses.

What if I’m stuck here?

With myself?

——

It’s several more minutes before another portal opens up, and Strange steps from it back into the room with America Chavez and Wanda Maximoff on his heels. Both women stop and glance between the two Kate’s with a strange look on their faces, but Wanda recovers first and walks closer.

“Which one of you is misplaced?”

Kate raises her hand weakly, feeling childish as the witch meets her eyes. “Me.”

Wanda hums and circles her, her gaze focused as she takes in Kate’s form. “You don’t look like this universe is trying to get rid of you, so that’s a relief.”

Kate feels her throat tighten, and her eyebrows shoot up. “What the fuck does that mean?”

“Oftentimes, when people are misplaced,” America chimes in, arms folded over her chest, “the universe they enter recognizes that they don’t belong and will do everything it can to get rid of the foreign entity.”

“Which could entail…?” Yelena says slowly, her eyes narrowed.

“The very fabric of Kate’s existence would be torn apart if she didn’t leave quickly enough.”

Yelena’s face pales, and Kate presses a hand to her stomach as it blanches.

“Not your Kate,” Strange quickly says, motioning to the Other Kate a few feet away. “Just the misplaced one.”

“My head hurts, holy shit,” Kate grumbles, her eyes screwed tightly shut as she rubs at her temples. This was all so fucked. She just wanted to go home.

Wanda’s hands are gentle when they land on Kate’s shoulders, and the archer looks at her after a moment. “It’s going to be alright, Kate,” the witch says kindly, her smile warm. “We’ll figure out why you’re here in no time, and then make a plan to help you get home.”

“Thank you, Wanda,” Kate whispers, her throat tight.

The woman nods and offers Kate’s shoulder a squeeze before walking back over to Strange and America, and the three of them talk quietly together, different books and hand gestures Kate doesn’t understand between them.

The archer wraps an arm around her stomach, leaning her other elbow on it and biting anxiously at her thumbnail. Wanda’s presence was a comfort, especially knowing just how much knowledge and power she possessed about this sort of thing, but Kate’s belly was still tied up into sharp knots. At one point she starts to pace around in circles, and the sight of Yelena and Other Kate talking softly and shooting her worried glances nearly sends Kate into another spiraling mess.

She suddenly stops in her tracks, eyes wide and jaw a little slack as she realizes that Yelena- her Yelena, future Yelena- couldn’t possibly have any way to know where Kate had gone. How long had it been since Kate disappeared? Was her girlfriend okay? Had she noticed? Was she worried? Panicked? Did she feel abandoned?

“Kate, hey.” Soft hands are suddenly on her arms, and Kate’s head snaps up to meet an identical pair of blue eyes. She doesn’t realize that she’s nearly started to hyperventilate until the other archer’s frown deepens, and the strange weight that is her own hand on another person moves to rest over her sternum.

“Breathe. I get it. You’re worried about Yelena,” Other Kate says gently, her eyes wide and conflicted.

Kate nods jerkily, her lips parted and trembling as she struggles to force air into her lungs. Of course this Other Kate would know what’s on her mind, it’s herself for crying out loud.

“This is so weird,” she chokes out, her hands toying nervously with the zipper on her coat.

“Yeah, yeah- it really is. But it’s gonna be okay,” Other Kate offers, eyebrows raising with sympathy as she does her best to keep her tone even. “Wanda will get it all figured out, and Strange and America will be able to send you right back to where you need to be.”

Kate nods again, rubbing her palms against her eyes. “Right, yeah. For sure. It’s fine.”

“Do you… want a hug?”

Kate looks up at her again, at herself, at her own face that stares right back, and gives a little nod, shuffling forward. She wraps her arms around the other woman’s waist, her face pressing into her shoulder and taking in the familiar scent of her own body. It was strange, to see her own face and hear her own voice, but to also have the same skin under her fingertips? She could almost pretend it was her mother, or a cousin- but a wave of comfort that Eleanor could never have possibly provided washed over her when Other Kate hugged her back, hugging her just the way Kate liked to hug others herself.

“This is weird,” Kate says again, a soft, tearful laugh echoing in her throat as her arms tighten around Other Kate.

The woman nods in agreement, her fingers gently combing at the baby hairs on Kate’s neck in the way they both knew made her feel better. “Yeah. It’s weird. I’m hugging myself. Normally this would sound really sad, but it’s actually happening and not some stupid metaphor.”

This makes a real, genuine laugh bubble up in Kate’s chest and she steps away after a moment. “Man, I give good hugs.”

Other Kate gives a bright grin, and they both start rocking back on their heels at the same time. “I know right? We really are just a teddy bear.”

We felt so much better than her and me.

Kate’s responding comment is interrupted by the sound of approaching footsteps, and the three of them turn to see Strange, Wanda, and America all approaching with conflicted expressions. Except for Strange. He looks neutral. Unbothered, almost. It pisses Kate off.

She never did really like him.

“Anything?” Kate asks after a moment of tense silence.

Wanda’s mouth opens and closes a few times as she shares a look with America, but Dr. Strange is the one who speaks up first.

“We figured out what happened, and why, but… it’s a little more complicated than we would’ve liked.”

“That doesn’t sound good,” Other Kate mumbles, and Kate can’t help but to agree.

Her throat tightens almost painfully, and her eyes dart anxiously to Wanda. “Not too complicated though, right? I mean, maybe you just need some time? To figure out how to get me home?”

“That’s… just the thing, actually.” America’s tone is nervous, and she flashes an apologetic look. “You’re kind of… already home?”

She’s met with three blank stares- two of which are identical and equally chilling.

“I don’t follow,” Yelena says, voice low and cautious, as if she knew they were all hurtling for an edge that Kate could topple over at any moment.

Strange beckons to America, who nods and takes Wanda’s hand as if to steady herself as she thrusts a fist out through the air in front of her. Light seems to shoot from her hand, and a dazzling, star shaped portal appears at an angle above the ground.

Kate’s breath catches when she first sees the blazing opening etched in blue fire and a bit of red, but then it catches again for a completely different reason. Through the portal she can see Yelena- her Yelena, with kind, mischievous eyes and short, choppy hair slicked messily back. Kate’s body tenses as she opens her mouth, as if to call out, to step forward and reach for the woman who held her heart, but another figure has her completely stopping.

Kate appears in the frame, her arms wrapping around Yelena’s waist from behind as the blonde cooks what looks like macaroni on the stove. The two women laugh softly and sway together, exchanging kisses and quiet words. It was a scene Kate was familiar with, one she valued and adored and always looked forward to on long days- but this specific one sparked confusion, and not recollection.

Kate watches herself kiss her girlfriend’s cheek and tug playfully at the hood on her sweatshirt- a sweatshirt that she had been planning on buying her the next day. Yelena hadn’t ever seen the hoodie at the time that Kate was tossed through space and time. This moment had never happened for her.

But there it was, happening before her very eyes.

Without her.

She had been duplicated. She was a clone. Kate was misplaced, with nowhere to even go back to.

Yelena did not even know she was missing.

< Prev — Next >

[snackugaki]

I was semi-joking last post but ....she’s so fun to draw wtffff

Following 2007 and Rise Splinter’s example, Bay Splinter absolutely watches soaps, teleseryes, telenovelas, and dramas and Venus watches some with him 

Casey taught them how to make their own skates, so now the entire sewer is an impromptu skating rink 

... I forgot that Leo, Donnie and Mikey’s shoes actually match (as much as they could make their custom frankenshoes match-- Mikey’s is like 98% duct tape and bandage wraps tbh; “But they’re still chucks underneath...!”) I just subconsciously went Punky Brewster on her shoewear. problem is I like both. so. nyeh.

have I settled on the size of her tesse--- hahahahhahahhahhahhha no.

in a brighter timeline, if they did a 3rd movie or just put both scrotes in and pumped out TMNT movies like they have Transformers movies I’d guess Venus, Jennika, Slash, Tokka, Rahzar, whoever were probably whatchamacallit, experimental groups to Splinter & Co.’s ....control group? subjects from different experiments with the ooze before April’s dad went whistleblower. or maybe experiments from the 15 year interval trying to recreate the first lab’s results ‘cuz Sacks would’ve had the resources to recommence pretty fast after the disaster

although to explain Venus and Jennika... since Sacks had ties to the Foot Clan, and Shredder pulled that double cross with Baxter in OotS. what I would guess is that Sacks pulled whatever weight he had left with the Foot Clan (maybe with Karai at the helm in Shredder’s absence) to use their resources for any gaps with his own and as a cover to reconvene his experiments. blah blah Karai studied under Shredder obvi and so probably thought to have the scientists report to her before they report to Sacks. Sacks was kept in the dark, not told they were more or less able to recreate the original lab results on the turtles who’d become Venus’n Jennika. “oh oops they died sacks, sux 4 u try again maybe, here’s some more animals for you.” 

Venus and Jennika are taken in under the Foot once they exhibit the same potential the boys showed; Sacks just goes a little apeshit on the science, as a treat, hence Slash, and then Tokka’n Rahzar and again told they failed. Sacks fully thinks he couldn’t recreate the first lab’s results womp womp u bitch

....how would any of them break out from under the Foot? lol i dunno. uh. mmmmmaybe black market “weapons” dealing-- Venus and Jennika break out (willingly or opportunistically) during shipment to... where? nyc why thefuck not, oh look they end up in chinatown *eyebrow waggle* oh now they’ve stumbled upon a grandpa, maybe his name is Grandpa Chung in the community, I don’t know, and he adopts them surprise! is he blind and therefore just thinks they’re lost kids? blech, does he see two turtles and see an auspicious omen? ehhh hmmm..... I guuuuesssss? or is he just gonna be an example of people doing good things with no prompting because it’s the right fuckin’ thing to do, they’re obviously kids with no guardians, and goddamn we know it’s for the plot but also people are just out here being good to each other guys, it’s real, it happens.

[nvandraw]

anyone know the northern boys

[Video ID: A black-and-white animatic of Isaac Clarke from Dead Space, dancing to "Sexy Train" by The Northen Boys. The lyrics are: "Hop, skip, jiggle me prick; I said sometimes life is a massive bitch". End ID.]

[midnightfox450]

Fiarina slay the princess au. If you even care

[girlwarlock]

okay so i was able to make a linux filesystem partition on my non-boot hdd which is meaningful bc it allows me to tell timeshift to save its backups there which i think means my backups will be safe if I ever need to wipe my boot ssd? like i think the point of timeshift is to allow a backup that makes you less likely to need to wipe your boot drive if you ever fuck things up too badly, but i still want to lose the minimum amt of stuff if i ever do need to wipe ssd

in that vein... based on how the "welcome to mint!" dealio described timeshift... it looks like if I remove the /home/girlwarlock/ exclusion from the timeshift settings, it should copy my steam games as part of the backup.

Is that correct? the partition i made is over twice the size of my entire boot SSD (bc i'm also using it for other purposes), so there's definitely room--if I ended up needing to wipe the SSD, would that setup (where timeshift snapshots are set to include /home/girlwarlock/ and saved to HDD) allow me to, for instance, restore BG3 from timeshift (at ~100MB/s [~800mbps], which is about how fast my computer copies between the SSD and the HDD), rather than redownloading it from steam (at ~5MB/s [~40mbps] and also burning through my generous but finite monthly data allowance for my internet)?

[seilon]

pro: ran into a coworker at a bar last night who I don’t really talk to usually (he works upstairs, I work downstairs) and we talked and im pretty sure we were highkey flirting and he bought me a drink and the bar merch shirt i was interested in and thanks to the power of alcohol i guess i asked for his number and he gladly gave it to me and. yeah

con: i have the second worst hangover i have ever had and have been fighting for my fucking life just to eat saltines

[trans-cuchulainn]

having complex feelings about gender stuff recently but i don't really know how to put it into words. some of it is about the self-erasure that becomes necessary when you try and talk about medical misogyny you've experienced as someone who isn't a woman but who is perceived by the world as one. some of it is about no longer feeling connected to female-centred stories of a kind you used to enjoy as a teenager because they always feel alienating but also not liking your own emotions about that because you should be able to enjoy stories that weren't written for you, it's just that they don't feel like stories that even allow space for you to exist in. but shouldn't men be able to enjoy women's stories too? but you're not a man. but you're not a woman. but the stories are about and for people who look like you but you're not one of them. but you would have been them if you lived in those worlds because nobody would have seen a difference, and that's viscerally uncomfortable, and impossible to enjoy--

and some of it is about looking for stories you could exist in and only finding stories that are profoundly unrelatable because they're only ever about characters who knew they were trans since puberty and had access to transition care in their teens and you didn't figure it out until adulthood and also that's not legally available in your country so that would never have been on the cards in the first place. or people who figured it out in adulthood but they're so certain and they're so ready to take risks and they'll change the world for a chance to become themselves because they know what they're aiming for. some of it is not being sure what you want but knowing you'll always have to be certain about it enough to fight for it because you're not going to get it any other way. some of it is not wanting to be an activist, not wanting to agitate, not wanting to have to resist every goddamn second bc you're just trying to exist in the world, but the only way anyone will ever give you a modicum of what you need is if you put all your energy into the struggle for it--

some of it is about feeling an ongoing tether to the experience of being a woman in a bad way but no tether to the experience in a good way and there's a weird kind of mourning in that, and a self denial, and an inability to reconcile your own contradictions in a way that feels comfortable. some of it is about feeling pressure to experience gender differently and to opt in to something else if you're going to opt out of what you were given but you don't want to do that either. and a lot of it is constantly self-policing your own emotions and thoughts and being convinced you're doing it all wrong somehow because you see other people being so free with their genderfuck, so unencumbered by expectations, so easily able to get it right for themselves and other people, and you're still misgendering yourself half the time in your mind because you don't even know what the right words would be at this point when you still have scars shaped like being a girl even though you're not a girl and you can't talk about them without doing yourself another piece of damage

like. i am who i am because i was thought a girl and maybe because i thought i was a girl and maybe i still don't understand why i'm not a girl but in my not-girlness i no longer feel i have any access to any kind of womanhood that doesn't hurt but i don't want to police myself out of femininity just because it isn't all that i am anymore

[asidewalksymphony]

Sorry for the random old man yaoi reblog explosion. I just finished Whispers in the Walls, and the conclusion being "The deep love between these two men is enough to hold back an eldritch entity in both space and time" fucking got to me.

[bravevolunteer]

finding good f.naf fics is so atrociously difficult but i did see one last night that made me think about the concept of mike / michael having dreams about the other version's life and THAT idea is delicious i'm chewing on that

[a-weird-being]

I bet Fukuchi Bungou stray dogs favourite pokemon games are diamon, pearl and platinum (derogatory) (not derogatory towards the games) (those games were great and have some core memories of mine) (derogatory only towards Fukuchi bungou stray dogs)

[jyoongim]

I have a brainrot to share and maybe it's a request idk but I feel like I have to preface this by saying I swear I have normal non-horny alastor thoughts he's just really taking up so much space in the brain rn.

Anywaaay, can you imagine Alastor with an extremely cautious darling? He wants her soul to keep her tied to him forever but no matter how good his offer is, reader turns him down and Alastor is just like sick of the rejections and the scheming so he's just gonna stoop to some other ungentlemanly methods.

And the night starts off as their normal fuckery in the sheets but Alastor starts denying them their climax and as reader gets more and more desperate Alastor proposes the deal again. Sell him your soul or he's just gonna pull out and go to sleep and he'll never let you finish ever again. and just

i swear i swear im normal i swear im not always like this 😭😭😭

Themes: rough sex, orgasm denial, alastor being a little shit, dealmaking, hair pulling, pet names, plot if you look hard enough, soul possessing

Title: Deal of a Lifetime

Alastor had always made it known that you were his.

It took you a while to figure it out from the subtle lingering touches to the way he acted. No matter how much time you had spent with the Radio Demon, you were still wary of him.

its not like you could help it through. 

Does were naturally skittish anyway.

And when it came the smiling demon, you had every right to be cautious.

Tonight Alastor made plans for the two of you to go out on a date for dinner.

You finished preening your hair and rushed to the lobby to meet Alastor.

”O-okay I’m ready. Sorry if i took so long” you said nervously as you approached the tall red demon, a blush bleeding into your cheeks as Alastor let out a low whistle as he took your hand and spun you around.

”my my Darling, what a pretty Doe I have” he purred, kissing your hands.

Your nerves were going haywire, fighting your instinct to back away you smiled “so what do you have planned tonight?”

what do you have planned tonight? Alastor grin widened at the thought as he watched you happily look at the menu.

How pretty you were in your black dress. Gloved hands excitedly tapping the menu. A bright look in your eye as you honed in on what might be your dinner.

You even wore the necklace he had gifted you.

Alastor was content with the looks you got as you strolled around with him.

you were his and everyone knew.

But you weren’t his officially.

At least in his way.

For years, Alastor had offered you a deal; Be his. In body, mind, and soul.

He wanted you by his side forever and a deal would solidify that.

But each and every time, you rejected the notion.

”I dont need to make a deal to be yours Alastor” was always your answer.

And quite frankly, he was getting sick of it.

But he was nothing if not resourceful. After all, how else do you capture a Doe?

Make them drop their guard.

The two of you chatted and ate to your hearts content.

When the waiter suggested dessert, Alastor simply declined, stating he had other ideas sending you a wink.

Back at the hotel, Alastor whisked you away to his bedroom.

Once the door was closed, he pounced; lips on yours and claws tearing at your dress.

You were flustered and aroused. Your hands massaged at his undercut as he laid you on your back on the bed.

His lips trailed your neck, sharp teeth nipping at your flesh, causing you to gasp.

”Alastor”

He hummed as he kissed your torso, tweaking and sucking at your nipples.

His claws dipped to your pantie, finding them soaked.

He chuckled “such a needy Doe” he tore off your panties to toy with your puffy clit and circle your slit.

You tugged his hair to bring his lips back to yours and moaned in his mouth as a finger dipped into your cunt.

Satisfied with how you began grinding into his hand, he discarded his pants and his heavy cock slapped against your mound.

You panted breathlessly as he teased his cock along your slit. You hooked a leg around his waist and threw your head back as he sunk into you.

Soft thrusts opened you to allow him deeper into the warm canal.

You arched as he steadily picked up his pace.

Your nightly rendezvous with the demon always made you feel exhilarated.

Alastor was very attentive to you. Always knew what made you tick.

He knew your body better than anything, so when he saw those pretty eyes flutter and how you cried out in pleasure, he knew how to handle you.

Your cunt was clinging to him with each thrust he gave you.

The sound of him sinking into your warm depth was music to his ears.

”On your knees dear” he said, patting your thighs.

Happliy, you turned over and lowered yourself into a deep arch, presenting him with your adorable ass and wet cunt.

Alastor admired you.

how submissive you were.

He growled as he lowered his weight on you and guided his cock by to his haven.

You gasped, feeling a hand wrap your hair into a fist, pulling your face up out the pillows “You sound so lovely doe, i wanna hear those tunes of yours”

His thrusts were hard, jolting your body as he rutted into you.

Subconsciously, you tried to meet his thrusts, whining as he hit that spot that has you seeing hearts.

”A-Al-Alastor i-I’m gonna…” you moaned feeling your cunt be wrecked.

Your insides tingled with the telltale signs of your orgasm.

But your sweet release was ripped from you when Alastor slowed his pace.

You tried to wiggle your hips against him, to seek that explosive pleasure.

Alastor was having none of that.

”Not yet darling” 

over and over he teased you right to that delicious edge, just to rip from you.

You were sobbing, ears flat to your skull as your cunt fluttered from your orgasm being denied.

You reached for him, whether for a anchor or a silent plea, you didn’t know.

You whimpered “Alastor please!”

His smile creased his cheeks, feigning a concerned tone “What ever the matter my dear Doe?”

He started thrusting into you, relishing in the soppy squish and how deep he was able to sink into you.

”Please please let me cum. I can’t..I-Ill do anything!”

A harsh thrust made you squeal

”Anything?”

You nodded, a moan ripping from your throat as he teased your throbbing clit.

”Then be mine. Submit your entire self to me my sweet doe. I already your sweet body and heart, but give me your soul. Let me own your very essence. Grant me that darling and ill grant you the sweet relief you so desperately crave” 

your insides clenched as he kissed your shoulder, beginning to pound into your soft cunt.

”or i empty myself inside this sweet cunt of your myDoe and you’ll never be granted a taste of my cock every again”

His lips at your ear, “your choice so what do you say Mon Cher?”

his hips grinded his cock into.

”Do we have a deal?”

You cried out, feeling your orgasm teetering “yes! Yes!Yes! YES! Please Alastor! Alastor just let me cum please please”

You felt your ring finger burn as he chuckled deeply

”why of course sweet Doe, cum for me”

A high pitched scream racked the walls as your orgasm clashed into, sending you in a babbling mess.

Alastor rode out your orgasm as he thrusted into you, before emptying himself inside you.

You shook as he wrapped you in his arms, bringing your hand to his lips.

A shiny gold ring adorned your hand.

He pressed a kiss to it and then an affectionate kiss to your forehead.

”Sweet sweet doe, my sweet Doe, all mine” 

[writingoddess1125]

Relationship Weirdness

Kurt Wagner x GN Reader Headcanon

Funny and Silly established relationship

Masterlist

This Link leads to Kurt Wagner- Or does it???

THE NICKNAME DILEMMA

• Kurt has a Love, Hate relationship with the seemingly endless stream of nicknames you seemed to have for him and how you constantly

• Sure he had ones for you, but all classic in affection!

• Like Schatz aka his treasure, or Engel! He loves calling you Engel, Liebling also, Sweetie too in English

• However from you he does get the 'Love' Or 'Babe' but also he gets-

• 'Fuzzy Butt!', 'Blueberry', 'Sugar Booger-'

• Some he was fairly sure one was a drug inudendos as well!

"Schatz- What is will the constant changing nicknames?" He ask you one day after you kiss his cheek and weirdly called him 'Sugar Booger'

"Do you not like them?" You ask, he shakes his head.

"Nein, I like them. It's just- Isn't that a slang? For a bad thing?" He questioned, watching a weird smile goes across your face as you suddently snort up his arm like you'd done a line off him.

"Yes- You my Blue Cocaine"

He stared at you with a deadpan stare, trying to hold back his laughs as he covers his face with his hands.

You're so fucking weird-

PHYSICAL AFFECTION FUCKERY

• Kurt's tail has a mind of its own especially with you, so more often then not it will be wrapped around you, sliding up and down your back, sliding across your thighs or trying to find its way into your hands.

• He never notices until you reciprocate the affection, often leaving to him being a blushing mess when you run your fingers up the velvet like tail-

• He is naturally very physically affectionate so will cuddle you or lean against you most times.

• Sitting on the couch? Kurt will slide in right next to you. Making dinner? He will lean his weight on your back and look to see what you're making- Personal Space doesn't exist

• While Kurt is Cuddly, You are grabby-

• His tail? His fluffy little ears? His sides? All fair game!

• Seeing two fuzzy asscheeks in the shower, you see how the hair sort of swirls like a cowlick-

• You can't help but touch them-

• Earning a loud surprised noise from Kurt as he turns to look at you quite literally messing with the hair on his ass

"Really?-"

THE BEARD ERA!

• Kurt is very feline like in nature and the facial hair adds to this as well it seems.

• He will like to rub his neck and cheek against you, sometimes giving a growl/rumble as he does so.

• You can protest all you want but he will just give you an evil smile and rub his cheek against yours harder before teleporting away to avoid the consequences for giving you mild rug burn on your cheek!

• When Kurt's beard starts growing thicker he gets some ingrowns on the part were his neck meets his head so you have to open pin him to get at them-

"Stop being a big baby! It's deep!" You yell as you pin your boyfriend, watching him squirm under you in protest as you get the tweezers closer to the series of bumps.

"NEIN! LASS EN IN RUHE!" He screamed as you get the tweezers to get a big ingrown that protruded from his skin.

"AHHHHHH!!!"

THE FOOD FIASCO

• Has very weird eating habits- You often forget he was raised in a circus in Germany so he eats like it too.

• AKA Hawaii Toast-

• Your mortal enemy and the thing that you are willing the kick box over in terms of the kitchen area. The first time you saw Kurt make it, you almost sobbed at this atrocity towards both Hawaii, Italy, Bread and maybe Humanity

• "What the fuck is that!?" You almost cry out as you see the monstrosity on the counter.

"Hawaii Toast-" Kurt says calmly as he butters bread, adds ham, a ring of pineapple and some kraft cheese on top before chucking it into the toaster oven while grabbing some ketchup-

You stare at him in horror as he makes direct eye contact with you and takes a bite of this- monstrosity

• He does know how to cook luckily even if he makes Hawaii Toast for himself- Him learning recipes from your culture and you learning from his. As well as taking turns with kitchen duty!

• For Drinks- Kurt is the Master! He can open any bottle, he can make the perfect pours! He knows the exact drink you'd like off the top of his head

"You're a fucking Wizard Blue-"

You say in awe as you watch Kurt make you a drink calmly, raising a brow as he opens the beer bottle with his tail like nothing.

"I know~"

[grilledcheese-aspiration]

in light of tumblr fuckery YET AGAIN

this blog and all my other sideblogs including my main, are all SAFE SPACES for my trans followers AT ALL TIMES.

NONE of my blogs are a safe space for shitty terfs, see your messy selves out and get your brains checked.

[artistsfuneral]

Earth is Space Australia.... but not just yet. Global warming is turning the earth into a deathworld and by the time we finally are able to live out everyone's star trek dreams, we're actually trying to find alien technology that reverses the fuckery of our ancestors.

A: You're planet is a deathworld.

H: We know! Can you help us undo it?

A: I'm afraid not. Do you want to stay on our planet?

H: No.... We do like our deathworld.