#T: Fake Relationship

[to-the-all-blue]

Sanji scowls behind his sunglasses. He’s draped in heat, under an umbrella in a bright patterned shirt, large waffle with a dollop of melting whipped cream and a coffee-stained mug on the table in front of him. Further out on the patio, a whole group of screaming kids jump into the pool in sonorous succession.

“Relaxing is a scam.”

Zoro gives him one of those multilayered grumpy looks.

“It’s fraudulent. We’ve been defrauded.”

~~~

Zoro and Sanji go undercover at a fancy resort to take on a mysterious enemy. What could go wrong?

Pleeeeeease read this fic. I read it throughout my day today and I cannot be normal about it.

[kaesficrecarchive]

[hanbin x hao]

cupidland by fragilities (1/1 | 70,657 | E)

Amid their turbulent and messy public divorce, actor Sung Hanbin and former-idol-turned-soloist Zhang Hao fall in love – for the first time. (Or, in the space of a single summer, a mutually-beneficial PR relationship between two celebrities goes from bad to worse.)

(twitter)

[steddieunderdogfics]

for this weekend's fake dating prompt i recommend operation homewrecker by hbdtotheground, i loved this fic! steve falls for eddie after beginning an ill advised scheme to wingman for robin. ive reread this fic so many times but i eat it up every time:)

Operation Homewrecker by hbdtotheground

@hbdttg

Rating: Teen and Up

23,797 words, 3/3 chapters

Archive Warning: No Warnings

Tags: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, No Vecna (Stranger Things), Fake/Pretend Relationship, Oh Steve where is your brain??, Gay Eddie Munson, Bisexual Steve Harrington, If you're not sabotaging relationships to benefit your platonic soulmate are you really soulmates?, Recreational Drug Use, Steve Harrington Has a Crush on Eddie Munson, Steve sets out to play matchmaker, But maybe the real treasure was the bi awakening he had along the way, Eddie Munson Wears Eyeliner, Steve has thoughts about it, Pining, Sharing a Bed, Getting Together, Minor Robin Buckley/Vickie, Friends to Lovers

Summary:

“So let me get this straight,” Robin says, her brows knitting together. “Not straight,” Steve mutters, because if there’s anything he does know, it’s that. Robin leans back against the wall, sighing heavily. She drops any pretense of real irritation, her expression adopting a strange mix of fond exasperation and burning curiosity instead. “You tried to break up Vickie’s relationship for me—which I never asked you to do, by the way—and then ended up falling for her boyfriend.” “Yes.” “And said boyfriend is Eddie Munson.” “…Yes.” In which Robin is distraught over the fact that Vickie’s got a new metalhead boyfriend and Steve takes it upon himself to intervene. Commence Operation Homewrecker — with some unforeseen complications.

Thanks for the rec!

This rec is a part of Theme Weekend. The theme this weekend is Fake Dating.

Know a fic that deserves extra love? Submit through our asks or the submission box!

[silusvesuius]

nelvas Problematiq*eyes roll back into my skull* *falls flat on my face with cardboard cutout physics* ((7 hours later)) *wakes up in barren wasteland* I know everything now.

[lost-in-fandoms]

me, every time a fake relationship fic, tagged happy ending, has the break up chapter that is always there in fake relationship fics, right before they get together properly, as if i haven't read anything like that before: 😱😭😨

[angel---eater]

i cant fuckin stress this enough but if you do not have DID/OSDD then you have no business investigating the 'realness' or 'validity' of ANYONE who says their plural. and if you DO have DID/OSDD? its none of your business. not your brain not your business

[95-6qrsk2rx9uq42069nnnnnjthewolf]

Afflicting tim with Gender and In Your Twenties because, well. (+ jaytim) (idea 1)

Tim is in her early twenties and fresh out of an identity crisis that she has a feeling she’s been putting off for almost a decade at this point. It’s a good feeling, but its also new and solely hers. She doesn’t feel like sharing. She wants to get acquainted with herself. (A few people know. Tam’s actually the first person she told. She helped pick out a cocktail dress and they went out to a fancy bar and had a few drinks and just hung out. Tam held her hand and didn’t say anything when Tim cried on the taxi ride home. Kon, Bart, and Cassie know. Their hugs are as tight and reassuring as ever.) 

Therese Dho has a modest, comfortable apartment the bats don’t know about, full of posters and comfortable furniture, strewn with piles of clothes and disassembled tech. It feels homey, like she can breathe, in a way that the nest didn’t and it's jarring to realize how contained she’d been keeping herself even in her own space. She’s about two months into her new job as a forensics technician at the GCPD, and thanks to her terminally untied converse and habit of tripping into cops wandering into the forensics labs, evidence tampering is on the decline. She’s sarcastic and blunt the way she couldn’t be at WE, letting her results speak for themselves rather than waste energy soothing egos that don’t deserve it. It’s not like she’s the only colorful character there, and she is happily absorbed into the department (not so)lovingly referred to as the lab rats, despite her relentless attempts to afflict her own organizational methods on the other techs. (It’s almost like you want samples to wander off she says, looking directly at the tech she knows is on Two-face’s payroll. He is sweating. Therese’s supervisor, who adores her new grumpy tech and does not want her new favorite to get shot, is also sweating.) 

The day she’s called into the commissioner’s office, she contemplates exiting out the window and making for the roofs right there in broad daylight. Closing the door to his office feels like the sinking pit in her stomach when a mission’s gone south and she’s failed to consider a crucial contingency. Between the lab coat, reading glasses and her hair being grown out long enough for the loose fraying braid its in, Therese is telling herself there’s no way Gordon recognizes her, but he’s also giving her a long hard look she doesn’t know how to interpret. And then he’s telling her that her supervisor is singing her praises and he has high hopes for her. And to maybe stop being quite so brazen about calling out her coworkers and just let Gordon know instead. There may or may not be a comforting hand on her shoulder, she’s slightly too lightheaded to tell. By the end of the meeting she still can’t tell if he knows who she is or not, but he’s not demanding she pack up her desk and get out so Therese will take it.  On her way back to the lab, the detective who occasionally brings her coffee and lets her ramble about the fallibility of bloodstain pattern analysis winks at her as she passes, and Therese feels herself blush. He’s tall and broad, more vanity muscles than somebody really putting their body to use all day, but not dirty according to what digging she’s done, and if he’s just flirting with her in the hopes of expediting his cases, at least he’s smooth about it. Her being attracted to men didn’t blindside her quite as badly as the whole gender thing did; less something she buried deep deep down and more so something she’d simply let herself glance past, though she would also like to be done Realizing things about herself. Not that she’d ever start anything with him anyways, for multiple reasons.

She’s making a life she thinks she can live with, though. The lab goes out for drinks and trivia night. She’s making time for friends and hobbies. Helping teach coding and computer literacy at her local library branch. Red Robin is still mostly a solo act; the person she’s shared patrols with most frequently in the past year, of all people, has been Red Hood. So long as she responds to requests for assistance, either in the field or behind the scenes (mostly remote), the bats seem content to leave her be. She doesn’t poke too hard at the question of whether her Major Life Changes have been noted or if, so long as she’s still providing support without a fuss, anybody has even noticed. She’s clear headed enough these days to know it's a two-way street and she’d been pulling back for years. She’ll probably always be involved with vigilantism in some way, but the network she’d put so much time into reinforcing around Batman and Gotham was always meant to keep on growing without her. She’s not hiding, literally underneath their noses every time one of them responds to the bat signal. If anyone really wanted to find her, they could. She’ll help whenever they ask for it, but the rest is for her now. She’s earned that.

And then one day on a coffee excursion she watches Jason Todd get hauled into the station, cursing up a storm, cuffed and incandescently angry between two nervous cops. She hears the grating voice of one of the more unpleasant cops in the station gloating that they caught this creep dealing to kids and he should be grateful that its the cops that got him and not the red hood, didn’t you hear that psycho kills people over shit like this? Therese deserves a medal for not bursting out laughing right then and there, though it gets less funny when Jason snarls that they know damn well they’d been the ones harassing the kids, and planted the bags on Jason when he got in between and told them to fuck off. She’s gotten behind the cop and plucked a little baggie from his back pocket very clearly not labeled as evidence by the time they’ve tried to slam Jason chest-down onto a desk. The whole bullpen is watching when Therese asks if this was the cop’s personal stash or that he’d decided to keep this guy’s product for himself. Jason is also watching, and possibly falling in love, when he sees this girl not even flinch as the cop tries to lunge at her before getting hauled back himself. It’s a big flurry then but he finds himself loitering awkwardly until he can talk to her, and asks if he can buy her a coffee as a thank you. He notices the styrofoam cup in her hand after the sentence is out and manfully doesn’t wince.

Therese is too focused on the high pitched ringing in her ear to figure out if Jason has already clocked her and is using coffee as an excuse to grill her on what the fuck she’s doing. She rolls her eyes and tells Jason he should check up on those kids. Excuses herself since her labs are almost done and she needs to dodge her supervisor because she refuses to fill out another incident report, leaving jason mildly heartbroken at the front desk and the secretary giving him a sympathetic look, saying ‘you know how those science types can be. Therese may not have even realized you were asking her out.’ And, well, maybe he can try one more time tomorrow. At least check in and make sure she’s not facing any retaliation from other cops.

So he shows up the next day at what he assumes is a reasonable time for a lunch break with a coffee and a few pastries in hand, receiving a thumbs up from the same secretary for his troubles. Except when Therese comes out to see why she was called to the front desk there’s such a clear flash of panic on her face at seeing him that Jason is already apologizing and turning for the door. He makes it out and is shortly followed by the sound of the door opening and closing again. Therese is there, wearing a very familiar steely expression, stomping past him with the curt order to follow her in a lower register that he’s heard before. She guides him to an alley and he’s pretty sure he knows where this is going but also what if he is actually about to get shanked?

“Jason” is the stern response to his hesitation, and oh yes, jason knows that tone.

“Look,” he says, joining her in the shade of the building, “if you’ve got an undercover thing going on in there, I swear I didn’t know. That trip to the station yesterday really wasn’t intentional.”

“I’ll read you in if you swear to not tell the others until I give the okay,” is the response and her expression is giving Jason absolutely nothing. He actually can’t remember the last time Tim was this blank with him and its unsettling. 

“Come on, baby bird, you're the only one of 'em I even talk to. How many times have you kept my shit off their radar? Of course I won’t go blabbing” Their rapport had only been getting better with each collaboration over the last couple years, built off of Red Robin’s stone cold professionalism that Hood could trust to see them through city wide crises in a way that he couldn’t working closely with Bruce or Dick. From there they’d gained a real respect for each other, Tim always willing to hear him out if Jason also promised to listen in turn. They’ve got similar mean streaks and senses of humor, with open invitations to any respective safe houses and first aid kits. Red Robin had given Jason a tenable source of backup in Gotham, in a way he hasn’t felt like he’s had since coming back. Jason had just been thinking last week that he hadn’t heard from Red in awhile, and that they were due for a check in. Tim shouldn’t have to ask Jason whether whatever this is will stay between them; it should be a given. He doesn’t hold onto those feelings of offense or fear for long as Therese starts explaining, though. This isn’t a case, it's her life. Of course this happens on her terms. Of course he’ll follow her lead and he says as such. 

“I do have one question, though, and if now isn’t the time you got full permission to dump this coffee on my head.” (I would not need permission but thank you, she mutters. Jason gamely plows on) “I didn’t recognize you yesterday. I just saw this little spitfire stand up to a cop almost twice her size on his turf to keep me out of trouble and not flinch. I came by today to ask if she wanted to go out for a coffee,” Jason is briefly reminded of the secretary’s previous comment as Therese stares at him. “I’m asking you out on a date, T.” And there’s the blush he’s managed to pull out of her once in a while, from previous light flirtations that were only mostly jokes she’d never seemed to reciprocate. But she is now, agreeing shyly to try it out. 

And it just, settles. Vigilantism is in their blood at this point, and they’re each other's backup. But they help each other be people too. There’s routine, bringing Therese her lunch at work, farmer’s markets and trivia nights and local theater productions. Kids at the skatepark who hassle Therese to teach them tricks. Jason comes home gushing about how well the kids he tutors are improving. They support each other through the bad days. An up and coming drug dealer gets it into his head that all the other entities in Gotham have someone on the payroll, a pet geek on the inside of the GCPD should be easy enough to bribe or intimidate. T kicks his enforcers’ faces in and while they’re trying to breathe through the blood pouring out their noses, Red Hood comes up behind them with a choice. Either they can deal with him, or he’ll drop them off at the police station, where they’ll spill everything their boss is up to. They can even say Hood did it and not a 5’6” nerd in a star trek hoodie. Once they’re among the other failed henches, they make sure everyone knows that this one is Hood’s insider and anybody who tries anything will not be living to regret it. 

They go home and Jason motherhens over Therese recovering from top surgery. T draws up new plans to reinforce Hood’s helmet. It’s all one and the same. They look out for each other.

[elftwink]

title: precipice pairing: caleb/fjord tags: fake/pretend relationship, costume parties & masquerades, implied sexual content, slow burn, not exactly canon compliant but canon adjacent, containing vague allusions to canon with no specific timeframe or setting word count: 46, 533 summary:

“So is this… worth attempting? Pretending we were invited inside and trying to sneak off to find the artifact? Especially since only one person can go inside.” “Two,” corrects Caduceus. “No plus ones,” says Nott. “Except in the case of spouses,” says Caduceus, “If you’re married, the invitation admits two.” “Caduceus!” Jester gives an overdramatic scandalized gasp. “Are you suggesting we lie about our martial status?” “I’m not suggesting anything. I’m pointing out the wording of the invitation.”

[read on ao3]

[byierficrecs]

❝ teenage blues ❞ author: @thornywords

link: archiveofourown.org/works/43892590

personal blog || submit a story || support me on ko-fi 💐

[lockwood-fic-recs]

starry eyes sparking up my darkest night

by agents_cxrter on ao3

Rating: T | Category: F/M | Relationship: Lockwood/Lucy

"So, you're taking Lucy and not me for the manpower?" "Er, partly." Lockwood grimaces. "But mostly because the party is for married couples only and no offense George, but you're not my type." Lucy chokes on an unfortunately timed sip of tea. "I am offended, actually." George says thoughtfully as he bites into his final slice of toast. "But I'll get over it on my way to the archives to do some more research."  Or: Lucy and Lockwood go undercover as a fake couple despite their very real feelings.

[myprongsfootera]

Prongsfoot Fake(?) Marriage AU

A real marriage under wizarding law - On AO3 here

Description: Sirius wakes up after a night of drunken shenanigans to find that he got a quickie drunken marriage in Knockturn Alley with James the night before. When they wake up, he's ready to call it off - even though it's the one thing he'd want more than anything else in this world - but James wants to stay married. In fact, to save Sirius' from the arranged marriage he's being threatened with, he suggests that they turn it into a real marriage under wizarding law by performing a soul bond ceremony.

What could possibly go wrong?

Tags: Pining Sirius Black, mutual pining, fake marriage, fake/pretend relationship, soul bond, POV Sirius then James, Remus and Peter are little shits, drunken shenanigans, 6,500 words, Rated T

[dnffics]

to be or not to be (my valentine)

by havocrat

Rated T, 5 chapters, 26.9k words

Tags: Enemies to Lovers, Fake/Pretend Relationship, Bets & Wagers

“No, I’m serious. Let’s make a bet.” “Well, you need to get serious about some bitches,” George crows. Sapnap is totally getting owned right now. What a loser. “No, okay– George. Listen, okay? If you find someone to date you, I’ll give you a hundred bucks.” “A hundred bucks?” George stops. “You’ll give me a hundred bucks?” “Yeah. If you can get someone by…” Sapnap glances over at the calendar. “I’ll give you some time. Let’s say Valentine’s Day. We can have a little party, you can bring your date. Or, you can come alone and bring me a Benjamin.”

At the end of George’s first semester at college, he’s already fed up with his annoying, self-centred, arrogant classmate, Dream. But when his roommate talks him into a bet he can’t win, Dream might be the one person who can help him out.

[berylcups]

Shit the D’Arby Bros Totally Said-

Telence : Daniel? I swear you would be of more use to me if I skinned you and turned your skin into a lampshade. Or fashioned you into a piece of high-end luggage. I can even add you to my collection.

Daniel : Are you saying that you have a collection of skin luggage?

Telence : Of course I'm not, Daniel. Don't be ridiculous. Think of the smell.

Telence:You haven't thought of the smell, you bitch!

Now you say another word and I swear to God I will dice you into a million little pieces. And put those pieces in a box…a glass box…that I will display on my mantel.

Daniel: * Terrified gasp*

Telence: Alright! Now that that’s settled, we can have a normal conversation! Now Y/N I want to talk to you about a man…a very dangerous and very unstable man…

Y/N: … *is visibly uncomfortable *

[steddieunderdogfics]

A comparative study of dating dudes vs. chicks By corrodedbisexual (mishabawlins) for fake dating weekend is a great one everyone should read!

A comparative study of dating dudes vs. chicks by corrodedbisexual

@corrodedbisexual

Rating: Teen and Up

11,339 words, 4/4 chapters

Archive Warning: No Warnings

Tags: Misunderstandings, Fake/Pretend Relationship, (but not really), First Dates, Getting Together, Eddie Munson Has a Crush on Steve Harrington, Steve Harrington Has a Crush on Eddie Munson, Steve Harrington is a Sweetheart, Eddie Munson Needs a Hug, Light Angst, Fluff, Humor, Confessions, First Kiss, Bisexual Steve Harrington, Gay Eddie Munson, Eddie's not a virgin but he's never been romanced, Pining, Mutual Pining, Post-Stranger Things 4 Vol. 2, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Friends to Lovers, Minor Robin Buckley/Vickie, POV Eddie Munson, Eddie Munson Loves Steve Harrington, Boys Kissing, Dorks in Love, Laughter, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Steve Harrington Has Bad Parents, Happy Ending, Love Confessions, Non-Explicit Sex, Steve Harrington Loves Eddie Munson

Summary:

Eddie takes Steve on a date. For research, of course; or at least that's what he assumes from the start. He's just satisfying his straight friend's strange curiosity about gay dating, nothing more. The only problem is, Eddie's never been on an actual date in his life. And the guy he's taking is someone he's been pining after for months.

Thanks for the rec!

This rec is a part of Theme Weekend. The theme this weekend is Fake Dating.

Know a fic that deserves extra love? Submit through our asks or the submission box!

[evanbuckleyrecs]

hoping it gets to you

Written by hammersmiths

Words: 16,283

Rating: Teen And Up Audiences

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply

Category: M/M

Fandom: 9-1-1 (TV)

Relationship: Evan "Buck" Buckley/Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV)

Characters: Evan "Buck" Buckley, Eddie Diaz (9-1-1 TV), Henrietta "Hen" Wilson, Howie "Chimney" Han, Ravi Panikkar, Ali Martin (9-1-1 TV)

Additional Tags:

Fake/Pretend Relationship, Weddings, Friends to fiancées

Summary:

“I’m not regretting breaking up with Taylor,” Buck says. “It just… would have been nice to go with someone, is all. Don’t get me wrong, I’m completely over Ali, and I’m happy for her and everything, but…” “But you also want to show that she’s not the only one who could move on,” Eddie says. And yeah. That’s pretty much right on the money. Always Eddie, to see him, ugliness and all. It’s a shit thought to have, because the last person Ali Martin’s big day is about is him, but— Well, but. He’s thirty-one and in love with his best friend, who is decidedly not in love with him. He thinks he’s earned the right to be a little uncharitable. Then Eddie says, very casually, “Just take me.” Or, Buck gets invited to an ex’s wedding. Eddie volunteers to come as his date.

[hp-fanfic-archive]

loving you is a losing game by livingincolors Pairing: Harry/Ron Rating: T Word Count: 13k Sick and tired of Hermione and Mrs Weasley's nagging, Harry and Ron agree to pretend to date. It's ridiculously simple, they live, work and go out together. Everyone believes it, and after a while, Harry starts to believe it too. Or, In which the lines get blurry, and Harry only realises what game they're playing after he's already lost.