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#THAT DIDNT NEED TO HAPPEN. OH MY GOD. THIS BETTER END WELL. IN TWO WEEKS I KNOW YALLRE GONNA BE SCREAMIN TOO BC OHHH MY GLOD. WHAT THE FUCK
luck-of-the-drawings · 4 months
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EPISODE 2 AND 3 HAVE BEEN SOOOO FUN im already so emotionally attached to each of these characters.. if anything bad ever happens to any of them im killing everyone and then everyone.
#cw blood#cw vomiting#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi suckening#ARTHUR BENNETS DRY HUMOR IS SOOO FUCKIN FUNNY OH MY GOOODDD the sleepin upside down bit omg..#i love drawing him with just the same stoic expression. he is a stone cold pillar of ice to me. one that loves his little kitty kittyyyyy#i loved watching him work with emizel aswell the dynamic is SOO FUN#I LOVE THAT EMIZEL IS SO FOND OF CATS TOO LIKE RAAAHH THATS SO SWEET.. pepper is his favorite cat....#the part with him defending pepper was SO CUTE UGHH i love emizel he is so small and sharp and pointy AND YET#there is LOVE IN THAT BOYS MOSTLY DEAD HEART I TEEELLL YOU HWAT!!! and in other news:#i love love love the concept of 'royal shut-in gets lost in the big city' MY BABY BOY SHILOOO I ADORE HIMMMM#AND DEACON WAS SOOOO NICE TO HIM givin him a place to stay n helpin him dress up for the party and taking him around town to see the sights#im in love with deacon i love him soooo much. AND ALSO. ABOUT SHILO.#HE CAN EAT FOOOOOD LIKE SURE THE GARLIC GOT HIM BUT WE GGOOOTTA GIVE HIM A MILKSHAKE OR SMTH#LIKE I THOUGHT IN THE FIRST EPISODE WHEN HE SIPPED SODY N NOTHING HAPPENED. I THOUGHT THAT WAS JUSTA FLUKE#BUT NO ITS A PATTERN ITSA PATTERN HE CAN EAT FOOD!!! BABY BOY CAN EAT FOOOD!!!!!!! FEED HIM MORE FOOD!!! food is the best human creation#I HOPE MORE GOOD THINGS HAPPEN TO THESE BOYS. especially since. well. okay so ive seen the 4th episode. sigh.#like holy fuck. hey ep4? what the fuck? hey you just let that happen? what the fuck. what the FUCK. EPISODE 4. HEY WHAT THE FUCK#THAT DIDNT NEED TO HAPPEN. OH MY GOD. THIS BETTER END WELL. IN TWO WEEKS I KNOW YALLRE GONNA BE SCREAMIN TOO BC OHHH MY GLOD. WHAT THE FUCK#EPSIDOE FOUR STILL HAS ME FUCKED UP SO BAD OH MY GOD. I WILL NEVER BE OVER IT. HOLY SHIT. WHAT THE FUCK. WHAT THE FUCK. WHYYYYYY. NOOOOOOO!
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delicrieux · 3 years
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☆ミ 𝚖𝚊𝚔𝚎 𝚢𝚘𝚞 𝚜𝚊𝚢 “𝚘𝚑”
PART 10: BIG DICK IS BACK IN TOWN
y/n is back in brooklyn for the holidays. thinking that a stream will make her feel less homesick for cali, she starts working on her famously titled hentai.free.srv. what was supposed to be a relaxing stream turns into a special delivery about two hours in.
─── corpse husband x reader ─── soc. media + written fiction! ─── word count: 2.2k ─── ❥ req: Here's one... You know those apps for delivery like Domino's or whatnot... What if reader is streaming Among Us with Corpse, and reader mentions they're hungry and Corpse offers to order them food, and readers like no no it's fine... Then there's delivery at the door (Corpse ordered beforehand) 
author’s note: fucky format is also back in town baby!!! also if you find any mistakes - no u didnt <3 thank u everyone for enjoying this story sm i literally cant believe how feral yall going strawberry cow was a nuclear explosion im still recovering tbh. got an ask a while ago and decided to incorporate it into myso. happy holidays everyone! myso will continue on monday!
ultimate masterlist.  ҉  myso masterlist   ҉   previous.  ҉   next.
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Indeed, being soft on any social media platform was the biggest disgrace and needed to be eliminated post haste. Moreover, it was a slippery slope - once you start flooding your timeline with cute imagery and heart emojis, what will stop you from posting inspirational Facebook quotes? Disgusting. If Rae were here, she would chide you (not you thinking about her as if she’s dead or something). For once in your life, you feel like you deserve it. 
Alas, you hope this little chaos you’ve caused is enough to throw everyone off. The stans, especially. You know the hashtags, you’ve seen ARMY scourging for info online with the same fervor and ruthlessness 1 Direction fans hacked airport security cameras just to spy on the boys. If you had any dirty secrets online, they are out to the public now - thankfully, besides the Harry Styles stan account (with edits and all), you have nothing. Though, now that you think about it, exposed nudes would have been better than your Punk!Harry edit receiving almost a million views. God, your life’s a fucking mess.
Your fans aren’t the only ones out for info - you, too, are trying to decipher Rae’s message. Code: Barbecue Sauce. The two of you had come up with it roughly two years ago, around the same time when you promised that if you didn’t find significant others by the time you’re 40, you’ll just marry each other. It was one of the many rules found in your friendship codex. Barbecue Sauce signifies information - an exchange of information. And depending on how it ends or begins (”So I’m sitting there” alludes to Rae, “On my titties” alludes to you), secret data on that person is given away, usually free of charge. 
But why? And to whom did Rae give away what? You had pestered her mercilessly and even sent some voice messages where you were crying. You were only crying because of a video of a grandpa smiling you saw on TikTok, but you are a snake, and so you put those tears to good use. If streaming doesn’t work out, you’ll just become an actress. Hollywood would love you. Your PR firm sure as fuck wouldn’t, though.
Rae was having none of it. She said you’ll figure it out eventually. Told you to channel your superior puzzle skills. You were quick to remind her that you can barely count to ten without having an aneurysm. Oddly serious, she admitted that she worries for you sometimes. Why only sometimes?! you demanded. She merely sighed. uttering under her breath something that sounded closely to “Boke.”
You leave her for barely a week and she’s already neck deep in the gay volleyball anime, hoodie and cardboard cutout and everything. Your life is falling apart.
But Brooklyn is nice. It had snowed when you stepped off of the plane. Thousands of snowflakes sprinkling into your hair, dotting your cheeks and nose. You missed this sight back in Cali. You missed your parents, too. 
Home cooked meals, old sweaters, your old room and about 40GB worth of old high school pictures on your computer. You went through them all one night. Some were stomach churning, cringe inducing nightmares. You were especially fond of those. Texted some of your friends that were still in Brooklyn, met up, decided to bake. Bad idea, Rae was the resident chef back in Cali. Besides laughing till your stomach hurt, and almost burning down your kitchen, nothing all that significant happened. Somewhere down the line, at about 3 am, half-way through a cheesy rom-com you had the overwhelming urge to text Corpse.
That’s where the problems really started. God, you missed California, missed being in the same timezone with a guy you hadn’t even met yet, how embarrassing is that?! You missed skating around and taking pictures of the beach in the setting sun, sending it to him, silently wishing he was with you to admire the view. 
You really want to call him. And to hang out with him. But for some reason, the thought of that springs up immediate anxiety and you shy away from asking. Him sending you cute good morning texts doesn’t help, either. Maybe it’s better he doesn’t know that you’re a blushing, stuttering mess each time you read “baby”. 
Late evening. Your stream is already set up, people are slowly trickling in and you greet them with a grin and a soft “Hello! Hi hi!”. You did your best to make your room a perfectly chaotic backdrop - led lights, an embarrassing amount of anime merch and plushies. You always try to balance out your weeb side by dressing hot as fuck for your streams - today’s inspiration just so happens to be egirls. Mostly because you watched one too many egirl make-up tutorials on TikTok, and also because you’ve been listening to Corpse’s song all day.
Yeah, no, who are you kidding, you dressed up this way because you were hoping Corpse was watching your stream. You didn’t forget your cat headphones, either. You know he likes them. You want to make him suffer. Perhaps then, finally, he will ask you out, so you wouldn’t have to.
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“I feel like,” You start when you put away your phone, staring idly at the chat, “I feel like I need a new name for you guys. Calling you guys after two years of streaming is just... weird, no? I also don’t respect men so I don’t want to call you guys. Like, so many creator’s have, like, a name for their fans. Uhm, Cody Ko has the chodesters, Kurtis Conner has, uh, folks? Kurtis Town? Citizens! Markiplier has mommy issues--” You can’t help snorting, “So, I’ve been, like, thinking - I know, shocking! - so I was thinking I’m gonna name you cockroaches. Because you’re grimy little shits impossible to kill. And also then I can use the legendary Minaj meme ROACHES!”
Your stream enthusiastically echoes ROACHES, making the chat swim. Yes, if anyone would enjoy such a name, it would be your audience. You’re as equally proud as you are disturbed.
“Well, anyway.” Leaning back into your chair, you throw your arms out with a bright grin, “Big dick is back in town, baby! If you noticed the backdrops different, it’s cuz I’m in Brooklyn now. Don’t ask me when I will return to Always Sunny, I don’t plan that far ahead.”
While Minecraft boots up, you decide to answer a few questions.
r u dating sykkuno?
You want to smack your head into the keyboard, but as it is, you can’t exactly afford a new one, so you refrain, “No, Sykkuno and I are not dating, we are just good friends. Uhm, I’m not sure how much I’ll have to repeat this, but, we really aren’t, so if the roaches could chill - Oh my God, that sounds so stupid, I love it - uh, yeah, if the roaches could chill that’d be great.”
the roaches lmao sounds like we’re a sports team
“Oh shit, yeah it does, uh-- maybe I can make like, jerseys or something. That’d be cool, I think.”
how disappointed are your parents with the way your life turned out?
“My parents are actually not disappointed at all!” You say with a cute little smile, “Uhm, they’re both really proud, actually. They’re glad I found something I love doing and made a job outta it. Dad finds my Youtube videos endearing. Yes, they watch pretty much all of my videos, unless I explicitly tell them not to. And yeah, with all the fucks and thirsting for anime characters. Uhm, it was very embarrassing at first, but I mean, after a while, shame just...doesn’t exist anymore, I guess? Funny thing about my parents, actually, when they watch my videos-” You eye catches a comment, “Oh! No, they only watch my Youtube videos. They don’t know how to use Twitter, thank God. Uhm, anyway-- when they hear a name they don’t know, like, I dunno, Dabi, or something, they google--” You’re grinning by now, eyes crinkling, giggling softly, “--who that is, and buy me like, merch and stuff. It’s really cute. 
can i be adopted by ur parents plz
will you and corpse ever collab?!
You were about to answer, though the man of the hour himself decides to do it for you.
Corpse_Husband: yes.
Okay, not to say your heart skipped a beat, but it totally did. With a pleased smile, you nod, like one of those bobble head toys sold at the dollar store. The motion is oddly reminiscent of Sykkuno’s own nod. Perhaps you had picked it up from him. The chat seems to notice.
pack it up, sykkuno
More questions pile about this mysterious collab you and Corpse are planning. Yeah, you’d like to hear more about it, too, since he single highhandedly decided one was happening right now. Corpse remains silent. Fine, keep your secrets. 
“Okay, guys, oh, I mean, roaches, Oh my God--” You’re covering your mouth, giggling, “-calling all roaches, calling all roaches, calm down. Everyone grab a snack and a blanket I’m turning up the music volume so we can all chill. Entering chill zone. Entering chill zone. Roaches, prepare.”
we are prepared
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An hour or so passes and you grow hungry. It shows with the amount of cakes you had baked in your server. Currently, you find yourself throwing eggs at the wall of one of the renovated houses, your face scrunched in concentration and slight frustration. 24 of the 50 eggs have been wasted. “What’s a girl gotta do to get some chicks around here?” you had uttered under your breath, until, finally, a screech - the egg finally spawns a mob. Your mouth falls open, “Aww, look!” You approach it, so small, walking in zigzags beside you, “It’s a baby chicken! Die, bitch.” The baby chicken is no more as you swing your bedazzled (you have mods) diamond sword. You’re cackling by the time the dust settles.
y/n is a child murderer
“Roaches,” You address your fan-base, spurring another fit of laughter - you can’t get over the name, “I think I’m like, forgetting that eating in Minecraft won’t actually make less hungry in real life.”
take a break and go eat queen <3
“Fuck no, we starve and die like men. Now I actually really need another chicken.”
Another twenty minutes trickle by and you’re trying to lure back a panda from the jungle when there’s a knock on your bedroom’s door. Whipping your head to the side, you slide down your headphones. At the same time, your mom pokes her head through the ajar door, “MOM!” You scream, “Get OUT of my room I’m playing Minecraft!” But your yell has no actual bite to it, as you don’t manage to hide your smile. Your mom laughs, doing some sort of sign language and motioning for you to follow her with her head. That or it’s some sort of performative dance. 
“I’m live right now,” You tell her, pointing at your screen. She knows this already, though, “do you want to say hi?” 
The roaches spam the chat with friendly hellos. You mom, quite impatient now, waves you over. 
“Sorry, roaches, mom needs something. Be back in a bit!”
Stopping the stream, you rush out of your seat and pleased she slinks into the hallway. “What’s this about?”
“Your pizza came.”
“My what now?” You echo, confused.
“Domino’s. You ordered pizza?”
“What? No? I was busy with the stream, I never--”
Thankfully, you had managed to grab your phone from your room before you exited. You almost choke on spit once you read the messages.
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You decide that it’ll be impossible to stream after experiencing what you had just experienced. You tweet out a quick apology to the roaches (God, that fucking name) and say that you had a breakdown but you’re okay. That is as a close to the truth as you managed to muster. It’s a sad sight, chewing and crying; your mom winced when she saw your state - disheveled hair and rundown eyeliner and everything. “D’aww,” She had muttered, caressing the top of your head, “don’t cry my little raccoon.”
If anyone was ever to ask you where did your chaotic nature come from, you’d answer with my mom. To make yourself feel better, you took a selfie - duck face and peace sign and the horrible 2000′s angle. Sent it to Rae. 
looking hot, her message read. 
thanks, was all you replied with.
You couldn’t just leave things as they were. Once you calmed down, you wanted to text Corpse, but how would you follow up the ungodly caps lock and screeching? Impossible. An idea sprung to mind, one that was brave. Taking the first step.
Instead of sending a text, you sent a voice memo.
“Thank you for the pizza, it was delicious.”
You voice still sounded a bit raspy. His reply was instant. Your heart skipped a beat. He sent a voice memo back.
“Glad you liked it, baby.”
He was going to be the death of you.
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tags (in italics is those i couldn’t tag! make sure all’s ok w your settings!) : @littlebabysandboxburritos - @fairywriter-oracle - @tsukishimawh0re - @ofstarsanddreams - @bbecc-a - @annshit - @leahh19 - @letsloveimagines - @bellomi-clarke - @wineandionysus - @guiltydols - @onephootinfrontoftheother - @liamakorn - @thirstyfangirl - @lilysdaydreams - @pan-ini - @mxqicshxp - @tanchosanke - @yoshinorecommends - @flightsandfantasy - @liljennyx3 - @slashersdream - @unknown-and-invisible - @sinister-sleep - @fivedicksinatrenchcoat - @mercury–moon - @peterparkerspjsuit - @unstableye - @simonsbluee - @shinyshimaagain - @ppopty - @siriuslystupid - @crapimahuman - @ofthedewthesunlight - @mythicalamphitrite - @artsyally - @corpsesimpp - @corpsewhitetee - @corpse-husbandsimp - @hyp-oh-critical - @roses-and-grasses - @rhyrhy462 - @sparklylandflaplawyer - @charbkgo - @airwaveee - @creativedogs - @kaitlyn2907 - @loxbbg - @afuckingunicornn - @fleurmoon - @yeolliedokai - @truly-dionysus - @multi-fandom-central707
more tags are in the comments bcs tumblr only allows me to tag 50 people max 💙
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neonlights92 · 3 years
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Night Changes: PART TWO
Jeon Jungkook has spent the last twenty years alone.  Single.  Solo.
And that’s just the way he likes it.  That is, until he meets the supposed love of his life.  Suddenly he’s falling over himself at the chance of a real relationship with someone.
The only thing getting in his way? You.
genre: fuckboy!jungkookie, college!jungkookie, romcom, e2l (kinda)
AN: I am so fuckin soft for college Kook you wouldn’t even belieeeeeve
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Within days of their ‘truce’, Jungkook realises what a huge dickhead he truly is for not remembering Y/N’s name.
She shares his timetable almost entirely.
“I’m the worst.” He bemoans after a particularly stressful lecture on American poetry, “You weren’t kidding when you said you were in all my classes.”
“Almost all your classes.” She laughs a little at the look on his face and shrugs, “I did tell you.”
“It makes perfect sense now why you hate me.”
Y/N nudges him playfully and shakes her head, “I don’t hate you.” “Yes you do.”  He sniffles dramatically, “And you should.  I’m an asshole.”
She pulls a face, “Now what am I meant to do here?  Tell you that you’re not an asshole?  That would be lying.” Jungkook reaches for his heart theatrically and frowns.
“I deserve that.”
She scoffs playfully, “Shut up, Jungkook.”
It’s been exactly four days since Jungkook and Y/N began to hatch their plan to try and get their respective soulmates to fall in love with them.
And though Y/N’s original idea was to host some kind of movie night at her apartment Jungkook has been slowly persuading her into throwing a full blown party.  Park Jimin is an absolute animal, Jungkook promises her (that’s a huge stretch, but what college student doesn’t like alcohol and loud music?) and throwing a party is a surefire way to get him to agree to coming. 
But Y/N isn’t so easily swayed.
“I’m going to make it up to you,” Jungkook tells her confidently, “I’m going to make sure that you and Jimin get together, and then when you have beautiful babies together you’ll be thanking me.  And we’ll forget all about the incredibly unfortunate way we met each other.” Y/N’s smile is soft, but Jungkook sees it.
“I know you will,” She says, “I have faith in your matchmaking abilities, Jeon Jungkook.”
“Which reminds me….Did you think about what I said, Y/N?”  
Jungkook has to admit - he really likes having her around.  Try as he might at first to have seen the worst in her, he has to admit Y/N’s not half bad. 
“About the party?” 
He winks, “Bingo!” 
“It’s a bad idea.”
“Oh my god-” 
“No, because I’m such a wallflower,” She insists, shaking her head firmly, “Jimin will just think I’m boring.”
“I’ll help you come out of your shell.  I’ve told you that already.  It will be like a life lesson for you - a chance to shine in the spotlight.” 
“I don’t shine,” Y/N is whining now, “It’s stupid to even try.”
“No it’s not,” Jungkook insists, “Everybody shines.  In their  own way.  Everybody.” He feels kind of awful for her. 
How can she even think that way about herself?
“You don’t - it’s not.  C’mon Jungkook I can’t-”
“What about the night we met?”  Jungkook interrupts, as the two round the corner of Jungkook’s street, “You were partying then, weren’t you?  You were shining then?” She flushes, “That’s different.”
“How?” She shuts her eyes for a moment.  Jungkook worries he might have pushed her too far.  He slips his bottom lip between his teeth and just as he opens his mouth to apologise she sighs heavily.
“It’s stupid.”
He brushes a hand over her shoulder, “It’s not.”
Her eyes open and he’s taken aback by the softness there. 
He wants to reach out and maybe pat her cheek but he decides against it.  Fuckboy or not, Jungkook is not the kind of guy to do that.  Is he?  No.  He isn’t.
Besides.  Soomi.
“Okay.  Okay.  I’ll throw the damn party.  But you’re helping me with everything, okay?”
Jungkook feels something like electricity shoot up his ass.  (He won’t ever tell anyone else he thought that.) 
“Yes!  This is going to be perfect Y/N I swear.  Jimin will love it.  So will you,” He grins like he’s hit the jackpot, “It’s the last day of semester in three weeks time.  We’ll use that as a reason okay?  And we’ll plan everything together.  It will be amazing.” Y/N’s eyes dart across Jungkook’s face nervously. 
She seems to be looking for something - what he’s not sure - but after a moment she nods.
“Fine.  Okay.  End of semester,”  Her lips fall into a small smile, “Do you think this will work?”
They stop at the entrance of Jungkook’s building.
“It’s perfect Y/N.  I swear.  Just perfect.”
When her smile widens Jungkook thinks he’s never seen her look better.
“I’m trusting you Jungkook.”  She narrows her eyes playfully, “Don’t fuck it up.”
He crosses his index finger across his chest and nods determinedly.
“Trust me, Y/N.  We’ll have Park Jimin eating out of your hand before you know it.”
And he really believes it, too.
//
The next day Jungkook runs into Y/N at lunchtime.  He hasn’t seen her in any of his classes today and when he texts her to tell her this, she reminds him that Friday is the only day they don’t share a timetable.
He has to admit he’s kind of bummed.  
So when he finds himself wandering into the campus garden with Hoseok trailing less than enthusiastically behind him, his eyes zero in on her immediately.
She’s eating some kind of burrito - probably extra spicy as she’s told him that’s the only way to eat Mexican food - and reading a book.  Of course she’s reading a book.
Nerd.
“Hey Hobi let’s go sit over there.”  He points her out to his friend and Hoseok raises a brow.
“Who’s that?” “Y/N.”
“Y/N?”  His brow raises even higher if possible, “Y/N as in the girl you slept with who’s name you can’t remember and who’s roommate you are in love with?  And who you’ve promised to help set up with Park Jimin?  That Y/N.” Jungkook frowns, “Well when you say it like that…” He rolls his eyes, “Shut up.  Let’s just go.” Hoseok shrugs and follows his friend - what good will it do him to argue anyway? - and when Jungkook reaches his destination he clears his throat noisily.  Y/N looks up and Jungkook notices she’s wearing a pair of thick-framed glasses.  He has to admit… She looks kind of adorable in them.
The moment recognition dawns on her face, Y/N’s lips lift.
“Hi.” Jungkook’s smile widens when she grins up at him.
“Hi.”  She shifts slightly, “What are you uh - doing here?” “Stalking you obviously,” Jungkook takes a seat beside her on the blanket she’s set up to eat on, and gestures for Hoseok to do the same, “This is my friend Hoseok.  The one I said dances with your boyfriend.” She wrinkles her nose and flushes, “Jungkook!  He’s not my boyfriend.”  She turns to Hoseok and smiles softly, “Hi.” 
Hoseok - to his credit - doesn’t seem to mind the Jimin comment.  He smiles back at her.
“Hi Y/N.”
Jungkook unwraps the dismal lunch he’s made himself - a sweetcorn and tuna salad - and gestures to the book sitting in Y/N’s lap.
“What’s that?”
She looks down and then up, “Oh.  It’s uh - god.  It’s stupid.” Jungkook quirks a brow, “C’mon tell me.  What is it.” She hesitates for a second and then rolls her eyes, seemingly accepting her fate.
Jungkook almost wants to remind her that they’re friends - she shouldn’t be embarrassed in front of him - but he stays quiet. 
She lifts the book to show him the cover.
“It’s a book on gaining confidence.”  Her shoulders shrug, “I thought it might help.  Y’know…  With the whole…” Her eyes flit over to Hoseok briefly, “Jimin thing.”
Hoseok chuckles and it catches Jungkook off guard.
He’d almost forgotten his friend was there.
“That’s adorable,” Hoseok comments, “Man if a girl did that for me I’d be beyond flattered.” Y/N’s cheeks flush and she shakes her head, “No - I mean.  I don’t know.  It’s not just for him…”
“Still.” She bites her bottom lip and shrugs, “I mean I guess.  Yeah.  He should be flattered.” Hoseok laughs again and Jungkook has a sneaking suspicion his friend might be flirting.
He doesn’t like that.
Y/N is not for Hoseok.  Not at all.
“Well she’s not reading the book for you,” Jungkook tells him, trying to control his anger, “She’s reading it for Jimin.” Hoseok raises a brow.  He takes a moment and then smiles again.
“I gathered.”
Jungkook spends the rest of the lunch break trying to stop whatever weird energy Hoseok and Y/N have going on.
There is absolutely no way in hell that Jung Hoseok thinks he can just swoop in and ruin all his plans, right?  Y/N needs to fall in love with Jimin. Park Jimin needs to be the one laughing with her and smiling at her and flirting with her.
He’s absolutely livid by the time Y/N scurries off to class.
“What the fuck was that?” Hoseok pulls a face, “What?”
“That.  That… Flirting.  What was that?”  Jungkook has barely even touched his lunch (and it’s got nothing to do with the absolute miserable state of it, he swears.) 
Hoseok seems confused for only a moment later.  Then his face opens up.
“Oh, right.”  He shakes his head, “I wasn’t flirting, Jungkook.” Jungkook hates the look on his friend’s face.  Like he knows something Jungkook doesn’t.
“What’s that look for Hoseok?” Hobi chuckles and shakes his head, “Nothing Jungkook.  Absolutely nothing.” Jungkook spends the rest of the day thinking about that godforsaken look.
//
Jungkook wakes up the next morning (which thank god happens to be a Saturday,) to a text message from Y/N.  He’s been trying to convince her to use more emojis - but she refuses.
Secretly, he finds her texting kind of cute.
But he’ll never tell her that.
Y/N: Are you free today?
Jungkook: as a bird.  what did you have in mind?? :) 
Y/N: It’s my birthday.  Soomi is taking me out bowling.  Wanna come?
Jungkook feels his heart swim all the way up to his throat.
Soomi?  And wait what - it’s Y/N’s birthday? He’s sort of offended she only brought it up now.
Jungkook: uhhh… what?? happy fuckin birthday y/n!!! ur naughty!!! birthday ??? why didnt you tell me yesterday??? 
Y/N: You’re an English Lit student.  Use proper vocabulary and grammar please.  And I don’t know I didn’t think it was a big deal.
Jungkook: u cant change me boo… u just text like a granny.  its your birthday stupid ofc its a big deal.  mind if i invite some of my friends??
It’s a few minutes before Y/N finally replies. 
Y/N: Yeah.  Sure.  Meet us at Blue Pins in an hour?
Jungkook: c u there… birthday girl!!!!!
Y/N: Ugh.
Jungkook smiles at the way she still acts like she hates him even though he knows she doesn’t really.
It really is the start of a beautiful friendship.
//
An hour later Jungkook finds himself sat in a booth with Hoseok, Taehyung and Namjoon, nervously tapping his fingers against the surface of the table.
Hoseok clicks his tongue loudly and grabs his friend's hand from across the booth.  His eyes are narrowed a little.
“Will you calm down?” “Are you kidding?” Jungkook’s eyes are as wide as a pair of saucers, “I’m about to meet the woman I’m going to marry.”
Hoseok scoffs at that and Taehyung scrolls through his phone, bored as always.  
After a moment, Taehyung clears his throat, “He said yes.” 
Jungkook feels like his heart has just fallen out of his asshole.
“What?”
“Jimin said yes,” Taehyung rolls his eyes, almost as if he’s annoyed at this spectacular outcome, “He’ll come to Y/N’s party at the end of the semester..”
“Oh fuck YES!” Jungkook fist pumps the air in joy as Hoseok chuckles in delight.
“You’re overreacting,” Namjoon tells his friend seriously, “Jimin coming does not equal Jimin falling in love with Y/N.”
“It gets me one step closer though,” Jungkook feels lighter already, “And one step closer to that means one step closer to Soomi falling in love with me.”
Namjoon snorts out a laugh, “Stop it.”
“What?” Jungkook takes a swig from the cappuccino he insisted on ordering as soon as they arrived, “It’s true.”
“You’re not seriously thinking you’re in love with this girl Jungkook?”  Hoseok’s eyes dance with mirth, “I know you man.”
“What do you mean?”
Hoseok raises a dubious brow, “You’re the ultimate fuckboy.”
“I am not.”
“Yes.  You are.”  Taehyung tacks on helpfully, “Notoriously so, actually.”
“Shut up.” 
Jungkook doesn’t want to admit it but he knows his friends are kind of right.  Sue him - he’s young and handsome and he’s in college.  Everybody fucks around in college.
“And anyway I don’t actively pursue girls unless I have the intention of taking it somewhere.”  Jungkook crosses his arms, “A fuckboy I may be, but a dickhead I am not.”
“Says the guy who forgot Y/N’s name after a vigorous night of lovemaking.”  Namjoon grins like the cat who got the cream and Jungkook wants to smack him.
“You can thank your dear friend Kim Taehyung for that.”  Jungkook replies sharply, narrowing his eyes at his so-called childhood best friend.
Taehyung gasps like he can’t believe what Jungkook’s just said.
“Seven tequilas on an empty stomach is never a good idea Tae,” Jungkook rolls his eyes, “You kept insisting.”
Taehyung answers with a flippant wave of his hand, eyes finally moving away from his phone, “Whatever.  You’re an adult, right?  You could’ve said no.”
“Not when free alcohol is involved.” “Anyway Kookie, the point is you can’t be in love.”  Hoseok leans back like he’s just discovered the meaning to life.  Always so smug.
Jungkook can’t help but find it a little annoying.
“And how, oh wise one, are you coming to this conclusion?” Jungkook’s tone is dripping with sarcasm.  He raises a brow at his friend and gives him the most pointed look he can manage.
It’s still Hoseok and Jungkook has to admit he respects his opinion the most.
“Because you’re you.  And you barely know this girl.”  Hoseok rolls his eyes, “That’s how.”
“I find that offensive,” Jungkook retorts, “People are allowed to change and grow.  Now I’ve met Soomi I’m different.”
Namjoon shakes his head, “There’s no point, Hobi.  We all tried, believe me.  But he’s decided that he’s in love with her.  Just get on board with it.”
Jungkook sends Hoseok a toothy grin once he swallows the last of the cappuccino and nods emphatically.
He knows what his friends think of him.
That he’s slutty and careless.  That commitment scares the shit out of him.  That he’s incapable of monogamy.  A combination of all of the above.
But Jungkook knows the truth.  He didn’t want a girlfriend before this because he hadn’t met someone that made sense to him.
And what’s the point of being with someone unless you’re all in?
“Anyway when you’re guests at our wedding it’ll all make sense,” Jungkook pushes his empty coffee cup to the side, “We’re meant to be.”
Taehyung laughs at this - despite himself - and Hoseok and Namjoon chuckle too.
“Jungkook?” The sound of someone calling his name causes him to turn quickly, eyes widening when he sees who it is.  Y/N.  She’s smiling at him of course - but that’s not what causes Jungkook to almost go into cardiac arrest.
No.  Of course not.
It’s the beautiful angel standing beside Y/N that causes him to almost forget how to breathe.
“Hi,” He squeezes out despite himself, eyes riveted to Soomi’s beautiful face, “Hi.”
Soomi smiles and Jungkook is immediately breathless.
“Jungkook right?  Y/N’s… Friend.”  The suggestive tone annoys Jungkook - he can’t have Soomi thinking he belongs to anyone else but her - and he nods.
“Yeah.” “But just a friend now,” Y/N pipes up helpfully, “We… Uh… Worked through our differences.  And now we’re friends.  Just friends.  Totally platonic.” Jungkook thinks she’s kind of overkilling the whole thing but he doesn’t say anything.  Instead he smiles at Soomi and watches as her face puts two and two together.
Yes.  Yes.
Jungkook wants her - no he needs her to know that he’s single.
Really single.
Totally single and available and hers.
Namjoon clears his throat somewhere from Jungkook’s left.  He turns to his friends and nods quickly.
“Right.  Yes of course.  My friends - these are my friends.  Taehyung and Namjoon, and Y/N you’ve already met Hoseok.” The two share a small wave.  Jungkook ignores the stab of annoyance that sends to his gut.
“Hi,” Soomi smiles in a way Jungkook is sure is almost too heavenly to be real, “I’m Soomi.” God.  He really is a goner.
//
Jungkook doesn’t want to brag, but he is pretty good at bowling.
Okay.  Who’s he kidding?
He totally wants to brag.
The moment Y/N splits them up into two teams - Soomi, Jungkook and her versus Namjoon, Hoseok and Taehyung - he’s determined to win.
He has to win. 
He has to show Soomi one of his many, many, many talents. 
“You’re pretty good at this,” Soomi remarks as he throws his first strike, “Or is that just beginner’s luck?”
Jungkook shakes his head and shrugs, “I’d say I’m pretty good.”
Her giggle is music to his ears.
“That’s impressive.  What kind of girl doesn’t want a man who can throw a strike?”
Jungkook smirks, “That’s what I always say.” Her eyes crinkle at the side when she smiles and though it's not quite as adorable as Y/N’s - he’ll never admit this out loud - she still looks so sweet his heart constricts almost painfully in his chest.  He forgets for a moment where he is, laying on the charm thick.
“Is that how you seduce poor unsuspecting women then?  With your bowling skills?”
He winks in that way that usually works and his smirk widens, “You know it!” 
Soomi giggles again and Jungkook is surprised at how smoothly this all seems to be going - when the sound of somebody throwing a gutter grabs his attention.
His eyes lift - thinking it has to be the other team - and he furrows his brow when he sees Y/N standing at the very top of the bowling lane, staring at the full set of pins in front of her.
Holy shit.
Jungkook momentarily forgets about Soomi - his competitive nature kicked into overdrive - as he shoots up from his seat and rushes towards Y/N.
“Oh my god,” He’s right beside her in an instant, “Was that you?”
Y/N looks up at him - cheeks flushed - and nods, “Yeah.  I’m terrible at bowling.”
“So why would you choose to come here?  On your birthday?” 
Jungkook is somewhere between disbelief and pure horror.  But he has to admit, the look on her face is sort of funny.  She’s mortified.
“Soomi suggested it.  She said it might be fun,” She looks away for a moment, “For her maybe.”
The sound of someone scoring a strike blares to Jungkook’s left and when he sees Taehyung performing some kind of ridiculous victory dance, he decides enough is enough.
“No.  No.”  Jungkook sets his jaw, “I’m going to help you.”
Y/N’s brow lifts, “What?” “I’m going to help you.  You’re going to score a strike.” 
She snorts out a laugh.
“I don’t think you realise how truly terrible I am at this.”
“And I don’t think you realise how truly competitive I am,” He gestures to the balls, “Grab the lime green.  That’s the lightest.”
Y/N watches him for a moment longer.  She looks behind him and moves her hand in the general direction of Soomi.
“What about Soomi?” He flares his nostrils, “She’ll still be there after I finish helping you.”
Y/N stares at him, and when Jungkook cocks his head towards the row of balls lining the back of the bowling alley, she shrugs and follows his command.  
Jungkook takes this as a moment to teach Y/N how to shine.  
After all, what better way to fell good about yourself than being good at something you always thought you sucked at?
When Y/N comes back with the lime green ball, he grabs her free arm and positions her to stand with her back to his chest, wordlessly.
“Woah.”  Y/N breathes, “What are you doing?”
Jungkook’s mouth is right beside her ear, “Just follow me okay?  I’m helping you, I swear.”
He slides his hand down to the ball and grips her fingers carefully.
“Don’t hold too much tension in your wrist,” He tells her sternly, “You’re too tense.  You’re always too tense.  Relax.” Something strange passes between them.  Y/N takes a long, deep breath, and Jungkook tries to concentrate on the task at hand.
“Now slowly, slowly, bring the ball back,” Y/N follows Jungkook’s movements, “And… Release.”
He helps her flick it onto the lane, and they watch in suspense as the ball spins towards the pins.  There is almost a moment where everything is suspended in time - before the ball crashes with the pins and nine of them fall down.
Y/N squeals in happiness and turns around sharply, throwing her arm around Jungkook’s neck and pressing herself against him in a hug.
“Thank you Jungkook!” She is smiling so widely, his heart turns, “You’re the best.”
“You’re welcome.”  Jungkook finds he’s grinning too, “You deserve it.  Happy birthday Y/N.” He pushes some hair out of her face - practical purposes of course, it was getting in her eyes - and she seems to catch her breath at the gesture. They stare at each other for a moment, before someone clears their throat from behind them and they break apart.  Soomi is standing between them, holding a bubble gum pink bowling ball.
Jungkook wonders almost flippantly if she only picked it up for it’s colour.
“It’s my turn, right?” She turns her smile on Jungkook and he melts.
God.
She’s beautiful.
“Right.”  Jungkook smiles back, “Your turn.”
When he turns to move back to their booth he notices Y/N watching their interaction carefully.  Her eyes flit away the moment she’s caught, but Jungkook knows what he saw.
Strange.
Very strange indeed.
//
Later on that evening, after they’ve all shared a pizza, and Jungkook has spent the rest of the night watching Soomi with hearts in his eyes, Hoseok clears his throat with purpose.
They’re sat in their living room - Hoseok has decided to crash over because, why not? - and playing a midnight mario kart match, when Jungkook’s friend seems to have something to say.
Jungkook pauses the game.  He turns to Hoseok.
“Yes?” There is a brief moment of silence.  Taehyung is forever scrolling through his phone, and Namjoon has long ago gone to bed.  Hoseok clicks his tongue.
“Are you sure you like Soomi?”
The question completely throws Jungkook off.
He raises a questioning brow, “What?”
“I’m just - asking.  I’m just…” Hoseok turns to Taehyung for support.  When his friend doesn’t notice, he smacks him across the shoulder, “Tae.”
“What?”
Jungkook narrows his eyes, “Have you guys talked about this?” Taehyung seems to realise where the conversation has just come from.  He actually locks his phone and sets it to one side.
“Yeah.”  Taehyung answers honestly, “We have.” “I’ve told you guys a million times.  I know I barely know her but -” “That’s not it.”  Hoseok licks his bottom lip, “I mean it’s crazy you think you fell in love at first sight but… Stranger things have happened.” Jungkook scoffs, “So?  Why have you asked then?” Another beat.
Taehyung sighed heavily, “Because we think you like Y/N.”
“What the fuck?” Jungkook snorts out a laugh because really - what else can he do?, “Why the fuck would you think that?” His friends share another look and Jungkook hates that.
He hates that they think they know him better than he knows himself.
Hoseok shakes his head, “Just a feeling.” “A feeling that’s wrong.”  Jungkook states firmly, “Dead wrong.” Taehyung nods and picks up his phone, “Fine.  Alright.  We’re wrong then.” Hoseok seems like he wants to say more but he doesn’t opting instead for something that sounds sort of like a grunt.
Jungkook watches his friends for a moment longer.
“Yeah.  So wrong.”
//
That night, when Jungkook’s just about to go to bed he receives a text message.  He opens his phone, expecting Y/N and finding, instead, an unrecognised number staring back at him.
Soomi: hiiiii jungkook :) it's soomi… y/n gave me ur number. hope u dont mind.
Jungkook pushes his friends’s ridiculous theory to the back of his head, and focuses instead on the fact that Soomi has just texted him.  His thumbs move to answer her but he pauses, moving instead to open Y/N’s chat history.
Jungkook: hey. happy bday again champ. u da bomb!! also thanks for giving soomi my number. u a real one for that, chief!!! :) :) :)
Y/N’s reply comes only a few minutes later.
Y/N: Thank you Jungkook.  I appreciate it.  And no worries… She seemed to really be into you after tonight.  So well done, yeah? :) 
Jungkook smiles at the emoji that he imagines Y/N forced herself to add, and almost misses the part when she says Soomi was into him.
Right.  Yeah.  Perfect.
He opens up Soomi’s chat and starts to write out a reply.
This is exactly what he wanted.
//
TAGLIST:  @cuddleboo @veronawrites @minluvly @severetimetravelnerd @moonchild1 @bunnyjeonjk @multicolourunicorn  @somewhereinthestarss  @jwlmnbt  @jojo-suga @zera10 @ggukkieland @thesugatoyourtae @dxlbts​ @wxndi
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hotch-stufff · 3 years
Text
Love is Complicated
Tumblr media
gifs by hqtchner & ncis-season-
Pairing: Hotch x reader, Gibbs x reader
Warnings!: angst, pining, kissing, fluff
Request: "well i was thinking about a criminal minds x ncis crossover, where the reader has a big crush on gibbs but then she meets hotch and she is really confused 😿" @wolviesbabes
--------
Your hand scribbled yet another word on the endless stack of paperwork that littered your desk. It really did never end. You set your pen down. You needed a break. You looked up and your eyes instantly found him. He was hunched over his desk, probably doing the same thing you were doing.
But God, did he look good doing it. Although in your opinion he looked good doing just about everything.
You noticed that about him over the past couple months on the NCIS team. You had been transfered from another similar unit in New Orleans on the recommendation of Dwayne Pride himself. Gibbs was quick to accept you to the unit, but he remained cold to you for the first couple of weeks. It wasn't until you saved him from a, for lack of better words, crazy gunman did he warm up to you.
After that, you two had gotten extremely close. So close that you developed a small crush on the man. Although, you hid it rather well. No one, atleast not to your knowledge, knew about your crush. And you intended on keeping it that way, but it was so hard when he was just sitting right in front of you, looking all handsome and just... him.
You wanted to tell him. You really did. But he was way out of your league, and you weren't even his type. But a girl could dream.
Vance suddenly came out of his office and called Gibbs up. He stood slowly and walked away. You prayed this wasn't a case. You really did not feel like dealing with a case right now.
He came back out a few moments later, a scowl on his face.
"What is it Gibbs?" You asked, he jerked his head towards Vance's office.
"He wants the team to attend an interagency gala on Saturday night." You scoffed. Of course he did. "FBI, CIA, and NCIS teams are all expected to attend. Including us." His scowled deepened at the thought of having to deal with other agencies.
"Great, just great." And you were so looking forward to a quiet weekened.
* * *
The night of the gala had arrived much quicker than expected. And of course Abby had insisted on going shopping for dresses. She herself had gotten a long black dress, with a slit. She said she would add a few things to make it more like her, and you couldn't wait to see it. You had gone with a more subtle dress. A long emerald green dress, with spaghetti straps and an open back. The front dipped slightly.
You had brought it with you to the office so you could get ready with Abby and as you were heading to the elevator to go to her floor, you heard Gibbs on the phone. Now you weren't one to eavesdrop, but you really couldn't stop yourself.
"I know, I know, it won't take long. I promise. Bye." Was he with someone else? You stood there frozen as he emerged from the room he was in.
"Hey y/n. Whatchtya doin?" He asked suspiciously.
"Oh, um nothing Gibbs, thought I heard you and wanted to say bye before we left, I didnt think you would actually go to the gala tonight, so I thought I could just stop in and-" he cut you off.
"Slow down, you're rambling. You okay?" You needed to get out of there.
"Yup, just been a long day. Alright well bye." You rushed off to Abby office. Once you got there, she instantly asked what was wrong. You explained everything. Your feelings, the conversation you heard, just everything.
"Awe, y/n/n. I'm so sorry. He's stupid if he doesn't see whats right in front of him." That made you smile.
"We should get ready." You stated standing up to grab your dress.
2 hours later, you and Abby walked up stairs looking amazing if you did say so yourself. Wolf whistles were heard coming from Tony as you two walked towards the group. You rolled your eyes, catching Gibbs smirk.
His eyes dragged up and down your body, which had confused you greatly. He had never showed any interest in you before, why now? Maybe he had and was just better at hiding it.
"Well, we should get going." You nodded, you all walked out to the SUVs ready for the night ahead of you.
* * *
The gala was interesting to say the least. Each agency decided to stay away from eachother, like elementary students. Each group taking up their own circle around the room.
You had spotted a rather handsome man who you had recognized as Aaron Hotchner sitting at the FBI tables and couldn't seem to take your eyes off of him. You new you had feelings for Gibbs,, but something about this man just drew you in. You had previously met him on a conjoined case with your old team, and you had developed the smallest of crushes on the man. You never expected anything to happen, and he was only in New Orleans for about a week.
Suddenly Gibbs popped back into your head, and you huffed slightly, turning to search for him. Finding him at a table nearby, talking with a woman. You scoffed and he looked over at you.
In a moment of impulse, you tunred away and walked across the empty dance floor straight to Agent Hotchner. He looked up from his conversation as you neared his table.
"Hi, NCIS Agent Y/l/n. We worked together on the Williams case about a year back." He nodded in recognition.
"Of course. Its great to see you again agent y/l/n." He paused looking you up and down in a way you welcomed. "Can I help you with something." He asked, not unkindly at all, but rather friendly.
"I was wondering if you would like to dance." He raised an eyebrow at you. "Someone's got to break the chill in this room." He nodded and stood up slowly, his team staring on in awe. You figured he didn't do this very often.
"I would love to." He took your hand bringing you to the dance floor as another song began. You two danced for about 10 minutes before more couples began to join you. You smiled in triumph and Hotchner laughed at your face.
"What? It worked didn't it?" He smiled shaking his head.
"I suppose it did." You two began talking and laughing and just getting to know each other. You soon found yourself at a table as you continued with your conversation.
"Okay but, im just saying if Strauss is anything like Vance, they would be perfect together." He laughed at this rather loudly, catching the eyes of a few people near by.
"That would never happen. If Vance is anything like Strauss they would drive each other crazy." You giggled softly. Soon it was time to leave, and Agent Hotchner, or Aaron as he had asked you to call him, offered to walk you to your SUV where the rest of your team was waiting. They all eyed you as this strange man walked you over, handing you a card and pressing a soft kiss to your cheek. You had blushed profusely and walked over, getting in the car.
"So y/n, whos the hottie?" Abby began interrogating you as soon as you shut your door.
"Thats Agent Hotchner. He's the Unit Chief of the FBI's BAU." You smiled to yourself.
"Must be an ass if he's from the FBI." Gibbs remarked, another scowl gracing his face.
"He was actually quite the gentlman." Was your only response before turning to look out the window. Gibbs was the one being an ass. You had just spent the night with a wonderful man and Gibbs just had to ruin it by spouting some snarky comment that only confused you more. The rest of the ride was spent in silence.
* * *
Once back at the office, Gibbs had called you to the elevator, not giving you a chance to respond. You had of course listened, and as soon as the doors shut, he had pulled the emergency button.
"What is it Gibbs?" You asked softly. He just walked closer to you, cupping your face. "What are you doing?" He leaned in slowly bringing his lips to yours.
And you had expected it to be perfect and explosive and passionate. But... it wasn't. He pulled away after only a moment.
"Hang on, let me try that again." And he leaned in once more, pressing his lips to yours. But once again, there was nothing. He pulled away.
"That was ... strange?" He asked, more to himslef than anything.
"I uh, that-that was-"
"Not what I was expecting." He finished for you.
"You know Gibbs, I've been pining over you for months, and I'm guessing you felt the same. But I think we both met someone else tonight that changed our minds." You recalled him spending the whole night side by side with the woman you had seen earlier. You smiled shyly at him. "Call that woman you were with tonight. Tell her you want to go out on a date." He smiled looking into your eyes.
"Only if you call Agent Hochie, or whatever his name was, and tell him the same." You laughed at not only his comment, but the absurdity of the situation. For the past 5 months you had been yearning for a man who ended up not being what you wanted at all. It made you think that maybe what you really wanted, what you both really wanted, was someone to love. So you latched on to the person who had become closest to you.
"I love ya y/n." He whispered as he pressed a kiss to your forehead.
"I love you too Gibbs. Now go get her." He stepped out of the elevator, pulling out his phone. You did the same, pulling out Aaron's card. It rang once. Twice.
"Hotchner." You giggled at his formal greeting. Taking a deep breath before going for it.
"Hey Aaron, I was just wondering if you were up for dinner?" He smiled.
"Of course. You know, I'm really glad you called."
"Me too." And you walked out of your office that night, a date with a man you had never expected, and a smile on your face.
-------
Not sure how I feel about this one, but I loved the request. Let me know what you guys think!! Thanks for reading! Requests are still open, so ask away! If you would like an idea of what to request, here is my prompt list, and if you would like to read more of my work, here is my masterlist.
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miraeluc · 3 years
Text
you don’t return from a mission
prompt: “diluc starts to worry when you’ve been gone on a simple mission for more than two days so he decides to look for you himself”
pairing: diluc x gender-neutral! reader
word count: 1,1k
warnings: mention of broken bone?? reader is hurt (not too bad), it’s just cute tbh
genre: angst, fluff
he was worried sick.
it was unlike you to stay overtime on missions - you did your work and left, avoiding unwanted commissions from strangers
after 1 day he wasn’t too worried, maybe you got carried away
after 2 days he was already starting to worry, maybe you went somewhere more far away and are camping there?
you were supposed to go to springvale though
that’s not that far.
after 3 days he was getting physically ill from all the overthinking - he thought every single possibility of what state you may be in right now
he hopes you’re just camping somewhere
he decided he couldn’t wait anymore and decided to go out and look for you himself 
the next morning he awoke at 5am
he couldn’t sleep any longer so he got a backpack with emergency items such as a first aid kit and went on his (not so) merry way
he walked through windrise
just to make sure you weren’t there
sadly you were nowhere to be found 
he sighed and kept walking - now on the way to springvale 
he didn’t want to admit if but he was so terrified of losing you 
you were the first person able to break down his walls in years
the thought of you potentially being in great danger made him automatically increase speed
he walked through the small village
“hey, brook. have you seen y/n around?”
“master diluc? y/n? they came by few hours ago to cook some food! looked pretty... disheveled. they said they were on their way to clear some hilichurl camps.”
diluc cursed under his breath
“did you see what direction they went?”
“took off in dawn winery’ direction-” 
“ok. thanks.” he cut her off
he immediately started walking again, now getting more worried after brook described your appearance as ,,disheveled,, 
when he arrived at dawn winery there was no one outside
that was weird
there’s usually always someone out there
where is everyone????
he obviously tried to go in 
the doors were locked
that’s double-weird 
double-weird until he very clearly heard you grunt in pain in the distance, atleast
what was dangerous enough to make dawn winery shut closed without asking him first?
he didn’t have enough time to ponder over it because he was already sprinting towards the source of sounds coming from you 
his eyes widened and he faltered for a second as soon as he saw you, on the ground in the middle of three cryo abyss mages
he was, for the first time, relieved to be noticed by enemies - the three now floating towards him
he felt his anger picking up when he glanced at you, lying on the ground motionless
so, ya know what he did?
he released intense flames - knocking his opponents shields off, letting his phoenix finish them off 
he sprinted towards you, dropping to his knees and pulling you to rest your head on his lap 
“y/n, hang on for me, alright? don’t close your eyes”
his voice was shaking 
“d-diluc- i can’t-” 
was the only thing you managed to cough out, entrusting him to keep you safe, unable to keep fighting to stay awake, enduring that pain
you woke up to the sound of wood crackling beside you, residing into the warmth it radiated
curse those cryo abyss mages 
you slowly peeled your eyes open, flinching at the sight of barbara and diluc hovering above you 
where were you?
is this.. dawn winery??
what’s barbara doing here,,
you don’t know and you don’t care because you feel yourself getting engulfed by diluc’s arms 
“god, you scared me so much..”
he won’t mention that he cried in front of barbara because he was so worried
that would feed your ego a little too much 
“i’m sorry.. are they gone? i just wanted to defeat them before returning home..”
“they’re long gone..”
he sighed and pulled away from the hug, glancing at barbara who was waiting for your little moment to end before she could speak 
“how did that even happen? you can take down three abyss mages easily!”
“I had cleared three hilichurl camps already and I was weakened - those took me by surprise as I was making my way back”
“you need to be careful next time - i healed you to the best of my abilities, but damage that only time can heal has been left behind. you have a broken rib and you were shivering the entire time while you were out! we warmed you up as best as we could and you should be fine now, but i wouldn’t be surprised if you do catch a cold the next few days..”
she then paused and looked at diluc
“you need to take care of y/n until they get bett-”
“you don’t even need to tell me. i won’t leave y/n out of my sight for now.”
she nodded and stood up
“very well. then, i’ll leave back to mondstadt, i still have work to do.”
without another word she left, which made diluc’s attention go back to you 
he reached his hand out to caress your cheek
“i nearly got sick myself when you didnt return home after 3 days”
you broke out in a little giggle, stopping when your rib started immensely hurting but you then spoke
“oh diluc.. you know i usually take longer because i get carried away.. nonetheless, i’m very thankful that you came to my aid, no one else would have..”
“it makes me want to fire all my employees - they were all ju-”
you cut him off, pulling him down towards you to kiss his lips 
“i’m glad they did, i got to see you fight~”
he scoffed, a smile spreading onto his lips
“seriously? that’s what you’re happy about?”
“well you looked very hot..” you trailed off
he attacked your face with tiny kisses after-
you best believe he didn’t let you out of sight the following weeks
he mostly made you stay in bed
always bringing you tea and left to fetch medicine for you in case of need
he even waited in front of the bathroom door when you needed to use the bathroom 
he even helped you shower 
you don’t express it verbally, but you’re really thankful to have him
no one except him supports and protects you as much as he does
he could literally kill someone for you
(spoiler: he already did.)
he’s your little meanie
did i mention that taking care of you also meant lots and lots of cuddles?
he always says it’s ‘so i can warm you up’
...
you know it’s because deep down he’s still very worried about your well-being
even after you’ve returned to good condition he hesitates to let you go on commissions 
he usually accompanies you, just to make sure
you don’t mind 
going on adventures alone can get boring - so having him by your side makes it all better :)
additional notes: hey there! there’s my second drabble. (truth is, i actually dislike this one lol). to be honest, i got so happy at the positive feedback towards my kaeya drabble, so i’m sorry it took me a while to write another one and it came out short too :( - i was having a little struggle with some writers block lol. nonetheless i hope you enjoyed this!!
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manonblaqkbeak · 3 years
Text
Sugar, sugar
(genuinely hate coming up with titles lol)
this is just rowaelin being pining idiots, one of my fave tropes for day 11--delayed love confession
just a note, the lifestyle in this fic is more of a background note and doesnt really take centre stage in this fic. it’s one ive been tempted to write for a while tbh but didnt really get around to it until now
cw: very, very light smut (like barely non existent, but just in case), a lil bit of swearing
enjoy! :)
3k words (officially my longest fic, yay!)
Every thought in Aelin's mind was blank. She trudged through her apartment that she shared with Nehemia, absentmindedly kicking off her heels that Rowan purchased for her months ago. Then the light jacket she wore joined the shoes, the fabric was perfectly soft and perfect for the autumn chill.
It was yet another piece of item that Rowan purchased for her. A lot of the things she had know were thanks to Rowan, either from his own wallet or from the biweekly allowance he sent her—a generous allowance that was a thousand times better than her weekly paycheck from the bookstore she'd been working at since she turned twenty-two; her business degree had turned out to be useless and so she turned to the bookstore that had been her stable job for three years.
Aelin barely touched her weekly wage now, it was practically buried underneath the money the Rowan gave her.
Because Rowan Whitethorn, thirty-five and a successful CEO who was well known, was her sugar daddy. Had been now for fourteen months. But he was more than that, more than just a man that paid her to spend time with him. He respected her, was loyal to her, listened to her and responded with actual sentences instead of a word or two like other men she had dated. He was charming, didn't treat her like she was nothing but arm candy, and she knew him so well, as he knew her, and each fortnight she sometimes forgot their whole arrangement, but she was sharply reminded when she received the notification from her bank that the two and a half thousand dollars that Rowan sent her was now in her savings account.
When she agreed to their arrangement after several get-to-know you dates, Rowan had wanted to give her three and a half grand every week, and gods Aelin had been tempted because she had never had so much money in her life, but told him that it was far too much and negotiated.
Two and a half thousand was the lowest that Rowan was willing to go, and even though Aelin only knew him for two weeks at that point, she could tell that he would not budge, so she agreed to the amount.
The first time that money had landed in her account, Aelin had thought that maybe she had imagined the whole thing, but the money was a sharp reminder of what she know was—a sugar baby. Those words still didn't feel like they applied to her.
And he still spent money on her when they spent time together. Just last week he gifted her with diamond earrings in the shapes of roses with a necklace to match. She wore them tonight, not because he bought them for her but because she genuinely loved the pieces.
Needing something sweet—despite the fact she had only finished her chocolate hazelnut gelato twenty minutes ago—she dug through her fridge and found the brownies that Nehemia had baked the other day. She told herself that she would leave some for her long-time friend, but Aelin really doubted that would happen.
Aelin relished in the cold air of the fridge as she found the new can of whipped cream on the top shelf. The fridge was one of the first things she purchased with the money she was now being gifted with (and after that came a new washer and dryer, a dish-washing machine and television. Almost everything in her apartment was brand new now, the food were actual brands instead of the generic, tasteless shit. She had bras that fit her properly and were so damned comfortable that she forgot she was wearing them half the time).
The old fridge was a cheap hunk of junk that she and Nehemia purchased off Facebook marketplace for a hundred dollars, it barely kept things cold, but with expensive rent and bills and general life things, Nehemia and her couldn't afford anything better.
Which was how she ended up in this situation. Picking up more shifts barely gave them anything extra, because the economy right now in Terrasen was shit. Nehemia had made a joke about needing sugar daddies, and Aelin, knowing that Nehemia could never really do such a thing, had decided that maybe it was a good idea.
Nehemia had told Aelin that she was insane for pursuing such a thing, and that she had only been joking, but Aelin was not and that she could handle herself if things went wrong.
Nehemia had told her not to do anything, but Aelin was determined and started her search. It had taken a while to find a website that was genuine and didn't make her feel like she had to scrub her eyes out with bleach.
She created her page in private, because she not only was Nehemia against the idea, but so was Elide and Lysandra—she didn't dare tell Aedion what she was doing. Her cousin could be an overprotective pain in her ass at times, and Aelin was very well aware that if Aedion caught wind of what she was doing, he would have locked her up in her room without any type of device so she couldn't go forward with her plan.
She appreciated their concern, she did, but she was a consenting, tax-paying adult, and if she wanted to use her time to get paid spending time with a rich man, then Aelin was allowed to do exactly that.
It wasn't prostitution, she had looked it up, because it was the sugar babies that had the power and so that was how it went with her and Rowan.
Aelin didn't even have sex with Rowan until it was the sixth month anniversary of her and Rowan's...relationship (and gods, it was the best sex Aelin ever had. Rowan was a generous and completely unselfish lover).
He was the first one she came across on the site and almost drooled down herself when she saw his picture. Silver hair, pine-green eyes, a beautiful tattoo down the length of his left arm and tanned skin, he was stupidly attractive and only ten years old than her.
Aelin messaged him first only after being on the site for ten minutes, deciding that surely he was the best one and that she needn't bother to look at any other candidates.
They hit it off straight away, and after deciding on a restaurant to meet at, Aelin had informed Nehemia of the matter, which she was promptly met with question after question: why can't a thirty-four year old man find someone his own age? Is he one of those men that can't date a woman five minutes older than him because of some stupid made up reason? How do you know for certain that it's him in the picture? What if he's cat-fishing you? What if he's a freak, or a killer? What if he's just pretending to be rich to kidnap you? What if, what if, what if?
And so after a heated discussion, Nehemia had come along on her date-that-wasn't-really-a-date and sat a few tables away from her and Rowan, watching them—especially him—the entire time like a hawk.
Aelin had completely forgotten that her friend was there, so enraptured by Rowan and what he did and how he saw life.
It had been fourteen months of seeing Rowan and genuinely enjoying spending time with him and weeks ago, she realised that she wanted it to be something more. That she had come to care for him, not because of the money, but purely because it was Rowan and he made her feel seen and he wasn't afraid of her, because she had once been told by an ex that she could be too much and that he couldn't handle all her baggage.
Aelin wanted a life with him.
So Aelin told Rowan she loved him when he dropped her off tonight after their dinner and a movie date, telling him how she felt, and he had said thank you. He gave her a chaste kiss on the cheek and went home, leaving behind the pine-and-snow scent of him.
Aelin really wanted to find a hole to crawl into and die.
She was scarfing down her third brownie when Nehemia's bedroom door opened, her friend clad in an old matching pj set, her slippers shuffling across the tile.
“What happened? Are you okay?” her friend asked upon seeing Aelin's guttered look. Her dark brows furrowed. “Did that bastard hurt you? If he did, I'll—”
“He didn't do anything,” Aelin interrupted her friend. Taking the food, Aelin planted herself on the teal blue velvet sofa Rowan gave her for Yulemas last year, ignoring the scent of not just him, but of them both from when he came over after work just the other day with pizza and a DVD that she insisted that she watched because it was too good not to, when they forgot all about the movie as Rowan buried himself inside her, leaving hickeys all over her neck that she had to cover up with thick concealer.
Nehemia joined her on the couch, her friend momentarily forgetting for now that she had walked in on her and Rowan just moments after they finished, muttering under her breath in Eyllwe as she glared at them defiling the couch, and gave her a look that Aelin knew that Nehemia would listen to every word that came out from her.
And when Aelin was done recounting the story, all Nehemia could come up with was, “Oh.”
“Yes, 'oh,'. I've probably fucked up the whole thing. So don't be surprised if I call you on your lunch break tomorrow telling you he's broken things off.”
“Aelin, I don't think he will. I know that I'm not the biggest fan of your...situation—”
“I'm aware,” Aelin said, cutting her friend off. “You still won't let me buy you a new mattress, even though yours is hard as a brick and lumpy as hell. I've told you that you can pay me—”
“Aelin,” Nehemia said, “we're not talking about mattresses right now. As I was saying, I doubt he'll break things off because I've seen the way he looks at you. I still think he's too old for you, but he cares for you. You probably just caught him by surprise.”
“How does he look at me?” Aelin was observant, but sometimes when she was with Rowan, all her observation skills went out the window.
“Like he loves you,” Nehemia said, no hint of doubt in her voice.
Aelin sighed, her feelings slowly starting to crush her. “I guess I'll just have to take your word for it.”
Sighing once more, Aelin put the food back in the fridge, showered and went to bed, forgoing her usual night texting ritual with Rowan.
She really wasn't looking forward to tomorrow.
X X X X X X
Rowan couldn't concentrate, which wasn't a good thing, since his job dealt with having to concentrate all the time. But no matter what mind-focusing techniques he did, he couldn't stop thinking about Aelin.
Couldn't stop thinking about how she said she was in love with him. How her beautiful eyes had been sparkling when she said those words to him. And how the light in them dimmed when he said thank you and kissed her on the cheek, telling her that he would talk to her later. But he hadn't texted her, nor did she.
I love you, Rowan. I'm in love with you.
Thank you. He really couldn't believe that was what he said. Felt like an utter fool and a bastard as he realised he probably crushed her heart. Aelin didn't like being vulnerable, and she had been when she said those words and he had gone and fucked it all up.
Rowan loved Aelin, he did, but he truly wasn't prepared for those words. He loved how on the weekends they would be up at one am, baking chocolate goodies, dancing in the quiet kitchen, humming quietly to Aelin's classical music playlist, with her wearing not the nightgowns that he loved, but one of his old hoodies.
He didn't think that he would get along with her so well once they met, thinking that their online interactions were nothing but a fluke. He was moments away from deleting the profile because he didn't actually create it, but Fenrys had, his friend grumbling that he needed a girlfriend, with Rowan arguing that creating a profile on a sugar daddy site was not dating but probably the opposite, when Aelin messaged him.
His life-long friend didn't listen, much to Rowan's annoyance—but he didn't grab his phone out of his friends hand; Rowan blamed it on the several whiskys he had downed by that point.
Aelin bewitched him on that first meet up. She was intelligent as hell and funny, and creative and beautiful. He was aware of why she was on the date with him, but he didn't care, just as long as he got to see her again.
Fourteen months later and Rowan was still bewitched. He wanted to be with her on a permanent basis, but wasn't completely sure how to take that step.
Clearly, Aelin had taken that step for them, and Rowan was the worlds biggest moron.
I love you, Rowan. I'm in love with you.
Thank you.
Groaning, Rowan turned away from his computer and looked at the skyline, ignoring the buildings to instead watch the puffy clouds drift by.
Aelin loved watching the clouds, loved stargazing, loved questioning about the universe and what the skies held.
He never really paid any of that stuff attention, not until he met her.
Rowan didn't want to lose her, didn't want her to think that he was about to break up with her over this. He had to see her, so he grabbed his keys and wallet, told his secretary to hold his calls for the rest of the day, and went to visit Aelin.
X X X X X X
It had been an usually busy day for a Wednesday and Aelin was glad for her lunch break as she trudged up to the roof of the shopping centre. She wasn't really allowed up here, but she wanted some fresh air and to feel the sun against her skin as she sat down and dug into her lunch—fast food, unfortunately for her, because she was so frazzled from last night that she completely forgot about making a pack lunch.
Rowan hadn't called her, or texted her. Not even an email had been sent her way.
Aelin hated that she felt so damned mopey. She was an independent woman, but gods, even a good morning text would have been fine.
She finished her lunch, popping several mints into her mouth to get rid of the onion taste, when the roof door crashed open and a familiar hulking figure came into view.
He must have spoken to Elide to find her here.
Aelin's brow furrowed. “Rowan, what are you doing here?” Oh gods, surely he wasn't going to break up with her, she still had hours to go; there'd be no way she could work if she had tears in her eyes.
Taking her hands in his, Aelin stood up. She steeled herself against whatever he was going to say.
“I love you, Aelin. I'm in love with you, too,” Rowan said, his eyes soft and full of genuine love. Aelin's heart shot up into her throat. “I want a life with you. I want us to buy a home, one that has warmth and character, and a big garden. I want a dog. And kids too, if you want, I know that you've never mentioned it, but if you don't want any then that is completely fine. I want to support you in whatever endeavors you want to take, and if you ever want to go back to university, then I'll support you, or if you want to find a way to use your business degree, I'll help you with that, too. Whatever you want Aelin, I'll give it to you, as long as you're by my side, I'll be happy.”
Aelin was silent for so long that Rowan thought that maybe he shocked her into silence. But eventually, she smiled, one that was dazzling in its beauty that it took his breath away.
“You love me?”
“I do, Aelin, I love you.”
She kissed his cheek. “Thank you.”
Rowan groaned at the amusement in her tone, in her eyes. “You're never going to let me live that down, are you?”
She smirked. “Definitely not. It'll be a nice story to tell our children...one day. For now, I think we should contend with being proper significant others.”
Rowan nodded, smiling. “I like the sound of that.”
“Good, because I need to get back to work, since I'm no longer accepting your allowances. I won't deny the use of your credit card, but other than that, you are no longer my sugar daddy.”
It was Rowan's turned to smirk, and it was the one that made her core clench. “How about I be 'daddy' instead?”
Aelin snorted, even as she clenched around nothing again. Smacking his arm lightly, Aelin kissed him. “Only if you behave,” she said against his lips, “and now I really need to go back to work.”
Rowan walked her back, their fingers laced together, and as she turned to say goodbye, Aelin said, “I'll see you later, daddy.”
Rowan groaned, and it took everything in him not to take her hand and into his car to have his wicked way with her.
By the time he thought of a response, Aelin was already back to work, helping a customer with an impressive stack of books in her arms.
But she knew he was still there, because the way she swayed her hips to the counter was all for him, and when she saw him watching her, Aelin winked, making Rowan's heart flutter in his chest.
He really did love her. And he would live with her teasing him for the rest of his life, just as long as she was with him.
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itzyourgirlnat · 3 years
Text
Caught in the act
Being Kara and Lena’s daughter was...let's say it was complicated. You always had everything that you could possibly need and your family loved you so much. However, it wasn't all perfect. Kara was almost like your best friend, you both watched movies, went flying, cuddled almost ALL the time and told each other everything. Sadly, you hadn't seen each other a lot recently.  You obviously don't blame her cause she was probably also dying to spend time with you. But, between Supergirl (who was very needed lately) and Catco she was always busy. It's surprising how you two live in the same house but only have a full conversation every three or four days. Lena, on the other hand, also hasn’t been very available. And, again, it's not her fault. L-Corp is growing even more and has many projects going on so she’s always in her office.
Even if you miss them, you never ONCE complained. It wouldn't be that bad if you hadn’t fallen into a routine, not spending much time with them became a habbit. You obviously talked to them (cause you live together) but about basic things and you simply stopped mentioning things about school and your private life. Your life went on, without your mothers knowing about it. And then the unexpected happened, you were in volleyball practice when she walked in. She was new and had just joined the team, somehow Rao blessed you and the coach asked you to show her around. Two weeks later you were somehow dating. Honestly, you can’t even believe it, you weren’t popular and didn't have many friends (the Luthor name made things harder for you) but Zoe saw you.
 Anyways, all that happened...and you just, kinda, didn't tell you moms anything about it. IN YOUR DEFENSE they were both very busy lately and honestly, they were already very protective and so you just didn’t say anything.
It was all going on well until one day. You were on a date with Zoe, you had gone to the library to study a bit and then you grabbed some food and simply walked around. You then accompanied her to her house but before going in she turned around and kissed you.
‘even if I love this, your parents could see us’ you said.
‘They are not home yet’ she said
‘Well in that case’ you slowly kissed her.
Zoe’s parents did not see you, what you didn’t know was that both Kara and Lena were in their car on their way home…
‘ We really have to make a change’ said Kara while looking through the window.
‘I know honey’
‘I just hate having such little time with her! What if she drifts apart from us and stops telling us things!’ Kara huffed. Lena grabbed her hand and squished it softly.
‘That won't happen, look, we have been very busy lately but, we are not anymore and we will spend time together like we used to. Besides it hasn't been that long and if something big had happened she would have told us’
‘Yeah you’re probably right’ Kara turned again towards the window. That's when she saw it. You kissing a girl who after hugging you and kissing your cheek entered a house.
‘OH MY RAO’
What?!’
‘It’s Y/N!’
‘Kara what is it?!’
‘She was making out with a girl!’
‘WHAT?!’
*******************************************************************************************
After saying goodbye to Zoe you walked to your house. Everything seemed perfect at that moment: the sun was shining, there were flowers everywhere and you had just had one of the best afternoons of your life. However it all changed once you got home. You opened the door and both of your moms were on the couch. They weren't talking or doing anything in particular, they were waiting for you. Oh no, this can’t be good
‘Hi guys’ You walked towards the kitchen and grabbed a glass of water
‘Hi baby’ Kara stood up and walked towards you. 
‘How was your day?’ Lena who wasn't too far away asked
‘Great, I had a study session and it went way better than I had expected’ 
‘Oh we know ’ Kara said. Lena immediately hit her on the arm
What?’
‘Oh well nothing’ 
You walked towards them and raised an eyebrow at them
‘Soo, what did you study?’ Kara asked, trying to change the topic
‘Algebra’
‘Oh, I didn’t know a part of algebra consisted on literally making out with a girl for five minutes’ Lena mumbled
‘What!’
‘We were, we kind of...we coming home when we...we saw it’
‘Oh my god’
You turned around embarrassed. Out of everything that could have happened it had to be that.
Lena walked towards you with her arms crossed
‘So, who is she?’
‘Um no one, just you know, a friend’ 
She looked at you right in the eye. Well nothing could be worse than this could it?
‘I met her at school, she was the friend of a friend and one day we just crossed paths. She was failing french and I offered my help’
Lena laughed softly ‘She asked for help with french and you kissed her. Why am I not surprised?’
‘Don’t laugh! She’s really nice and smart’ You were now blushing
‘For how long have you been together?’ Kara asked
‘Not much, just um, a couple of months or so’ You avoided looking at her.  Even if it didnt seem like it, Kara was incredibly overprotective with you.
‘A couple of months?!’ Oh no, this is not good.’WHAT DO YOU MEAN A COUPLE OF MONTHS?’ 
‘I mean 60 days or so’ you said sarcastically
‘Why didn't you tell us?!’ she runned towards you
‘Well I…’ You looked at Lena who immediately rose her brow
You took a deep breath
‘It's just that I, i don't know, at first I thought it wasn't a serious thing, but the it suddenly was and you were both really busy and I was kind of scared and I just, i guess I made excuses to not tell you’ You were ashamed and looked down
‘Baby’ Kara held your hand. ‘We know that we haven't been around much lately and we are really sorry, but you don't have to be afraid, not of telling us things’
‘Yeah, because we really wanna know what's going on in your life’ Lena added
’I’m sorry’
Kara hugged you
‘Don't be Y/N, it's kind of our fault, but please tell us what’s going on in your life’
Lena hugged you too and know you were between them
‘Yes please tell us and we promise that it is the most important thing for us, more than work and anything’ she said
You all stood there just enjoying each other's touch since it had been long since you had all hugged properly. 
‘So tell us, how is she?’ Lena asked breaking the hug
You then spent the whole night talking about Zoe and the other things that had happened in your life, and finally, you felt at home.
The end
Ok so I wanna thank @supercorpkid who inspired and ecouraged me to write and @gleamylix who also helped:)
If you have any request feel free to tell but (but I’m new to tumblr so im not sure how this works yet, have mercy )
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kaz11283 · 3 years
Text
The Shape of You
Summary: While at one of Tonys top end parties the god of mischief asks you to dance to your suprise. You didn't think he was the type to dance muchless to the song that he decided to ask you to dsnce to.
Characters: Loki, Thor, Tony, Natalie, Wanda, Clint, Steve
Pairings: you x Loki, you x Thor (platonic), you x Tony (Brother, sister)
ANNOUNCMENTS: I got this idea while listening to "Shape of You", then I really started getting into the story everytime that I listened to it (which was a lot). Ive had this on my head for a while now but i had to finish up I think I'm in love and part 2. I also got 200 followers today, next is 300, lets get this! BTW I know that this is a GIF from High Rise but it gives you a PRETTY good iead whats going on. 💚💚💚
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"Why do you insist on bringing me to the boring ass parties Nat?" You asked trying to pull the hem of the dress down that she had picked oit for you. It wad a dark blue thigh length dress with a very low v neck, the shoes where a high heel ankle strap black shoe with small bows on the side the same color as the dress.
"Stop. Stop pulling, your not gonna make it any longer by doing that." She said swatting your hands away. "I bring you to these 'boring ass parties' because you spend to much time in the library doimg research, in your room working, or sitting in the lab trying to make something better. Point is, you are always working."
"I dont hear you complaining when something of yours gets improved, or an upgrade. Nat I love you but I am a weponds expert. I work better in the quite, thats my zone. Not here."
"Is that why you enjoy spending time with Loki? Because I have to tell you y/n hes not really the quite type." She rasied an eyebrow to look st you.
"Hes not the quite type around all of you because you all make snide remarks. Hes usually quite around me because I dont pick on him or call him names." You turned and looked straight at her.
"All of the other reindeer, use to laugh and call him names." Tony sang walking up to the two of you with a drink. "Couldnt be talking about reindeer game could you?"
"Thank you Tony, and we were just finishing talking and Loki." You answered walking off to sit at the bar where Steve and Thor was sitting.
"Your brother throws one heck of a party." Steve saod tilting his beer to his mouth. "Defiantly better than some of the parties I've been to."
"It is a good party but nothing like the ones on Asguard." Thor boomed with laughter. "You must come some time, we would have a grand celebration in your honor."
"Hes always been a little over the top, if you cant tell. Always had an eye for big, expensive things. Flamboyant parties, playboy style women, expensive cars. Whatever he wants he gets, now dont get me wrong he does work his ass off, but sometimes it would be nice to just have a weekend were the walls didnt shake while I am trying to work on something."
"Ah but little sister, all work and no play makes y/n a dull boy." Tony answered lightly slapping your back.
"Jesus Christ Tone, stop quoting movies, it gets rather annoying."
"Another round, bartender, for little sister." Tony said ruffling your hair.
"You realize I cant stand you right?" You shot him a sideways look.
"Thats why I dont let you work on my toys." He answered giving you a kiss on the top of the head before walking off.
"Thor?" You turned to the god of thunder.
"Yes Lady y/n?" He turned to were he was facing you, his legs on either side of your thighs.
"Do you know of your brother is going to show up?" He laughed turning back to the bar. "Dont get me wrong I absolutly love your company but...."
"You would rather have the company of a more slender, raven haired man tonight." He raised a brow while taking a drink of his beer.
"Well, yes. He is quite interesting to say the least." You laugh.
"Well lady y/n, he said he would be down shortly. He did say he was going to make an apperance though."
"Thank you." You stood, leaning down to kiss his cheek before walking off to find someone else interesting to talk to.
"Hey y/n! Over here!" Clint shouted waving you over to were he, Nat, and Wanda were sitting.
You sat talking to them for a little bit about what new stuff you had added to their weapons and gear, Clint was excited about trying out some of the new arrows that you had developed. You kept gnacing around the room hoping to catch a glips of Loki when he decided to come down.
While you and Wanda was in the middle of a conversation you felt a tap on your shoulder. Turning slightly you seen Loki stamding there was a know it all smirk on his face, he was wearing a completly black suit with his hair slicked back, you coud have swore that your heart stopped.
"Hello Darling, I heard you had been asking about me?" He offered you his hand to help you stand.
You laughed tucking your chin down slightly, you could feel your cheeks heat up. "I am going to kill your brother." He lead you back to the bar and getting you a drink handing it to you.
"You look quite ravishing tonight." He leaned in whispering in your ear. "Dont start being bashful tonight, after what happened last night." He had caught you off guard causing you to spit your drink back in your glass.
"Loki," you hissed smacking him on his shoulder. "We dont need Tony going all Iron Man on you tonight."
"Dance with me." He took your glass sitting it back on the bar and grabbed your hand.
"Oh no no no no. I dont dance." You tried stopping but he pulled you to the edge of the damce floor.
"Then dont dance, let the music guide you, or just follow my lead." He grabbed your waist pulling you closer to him, the song was an up beat song and he started moving. "Midguardian dances are so simple, it would be a type of tango I am assuming." He took you hand and wrapped it around the back of his head before placing his hand on your lower back pulling you even closer.
"This is crazy." You laughed after a few practice steps. It was simple yet intimate at the same time, you had a feeling you knew where this was heading.
"But simple, you are better than what you give your self credit for." He spund you around a few times as the tempo changed, when he spun you back to him his chest ws aginst your back as his hamd splayed across your abdomen.
He traced his nose up the side of your neck as you both moved causing you to give a small moan. "My bed sheets still smell like you." He whispered.
"Loki, can I let you in on a secret." You turned back in his arms to face him.
"Of course my dear." His fingers stroked your back.
"I think I'm in love with you." You wrapped your hand around his head so that you could pull his ear down to your level. You heard him take a breath and the dancing faltered slightly but he kept moving.
"It feels as though I might be returning those feelings y/n." You smiled up at him he turned you in a few more circles causing you to be facing away from him again. His hips following yours in a delicious manner causing your thoughts to go back to the night before. His trailing kisses down your neck to your collar bones, fingers caressing up your sides pulling your shirt over your head. You returning the favor and being speechless at finally seeing him with out his shirt on. He had a more slender figure but his muscles were still there. Remembering the feeling of his chest clenching as you ran your fingers up and around his neck to pull him closer for the earth shattering kiss that had lead to so much more.
"You reliving some of last nights activities, y/n?" He asked quietly.
"Yes but sadly I am having trouble remembering some parts. You might have to remind me." The song ended as you pulled him off the dance floor and through the doors leading to the hallway.
~~~~~
Tag List:
@kgirardin
@sophlubbwriting
@supbeeches
@high-functioning-lokipath
@rosaline-black
@serpentargo
@drbaureid
ANNOUNCEMENT 2: Wow wow wow, ok so some slightly adult situations but oh dear lord, my face is a little red just from writting that. I've read worst but never wrote. What I would give to be twirled around the dance floor like that by him. Thank you guys for reading! I really hope you enjoy this one. Like I saod I have been thinking about this for about a week now and here it is. I habe to say this is like top 3 of my faves (my first was and still is my fave "Bath Time For a Prince") Thank you again for all the love and the support!!!!
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I’ll always love you
Pairings: Oikawa × Fem!reader (established relationship)
Warnings: angst to fluff, heart break, (fluff ending)
You and Oikawa have been dating for over a year and a half. Hes recently recovered from a knee injury and even though hes promised that he’ll take it easy. You know he won’t.
So one night after school you are waiting for him to go home. When the most of the team had already left nearly thirty minutes ago. You walk in and see your boyfriend and Iwaizumi.
“Toru!” You scold seeing him still practicing
He freezes hearing you and walks over.
“Hey cutie” he said “you’re still here?”
“Yes you were supposed to walk me home” she said “and the rest of the team left almost a half hour ago”
“Well you se-” he started
“Enough, you just recovered from your last knee injury” you said “you promised me that you would take it easy so you wouldn’t hurt yourself again, but here you are doing extra practice”
“But I am” he said
“No you’re not Toru, if you were you would be home” you said “I know you love volleyball, but I can’t sit by and watch you get hurt again”
“Wait baby, you don’t mean that” he said
“But I do Toru, I can’t sit by and watch you do this to yourself” you said “so tomorrow, I need you to come to my house and I’ll give you, your stuff back”
“But I love you so much” he said tearing up “I dont want this I dont want to break up”
You kiss him on the cheek before taking off his volleyball jacket and giving it back to him. After that you run out tears falling down your face. When you get home you start putting all of his things into a box, his clothes you had been given and that you had stolen. Some of the gifts he had given you. You touch the necklace around your neck, it had been your one year anniversary gift from him, it was a small pendant with a circle charm that had his first name initial ’T’ stamped into the metal. Taking off the necklace. You give it a kiss before putting it in your jewelry box, not having the heart to give it back to him. Its not that you didnt love him anymore, quite the opposite. You loved him too much that you couldn’t bare to watch him hurt himself. You take down all of the pictures and random polaroids from your room putting them safely in your desk. You end up crawling into bed and cry yourself to sleep. In the morning your eyes are red and slightly puffy from crying.
You hear a knock on your bedroom door. That pulls you out of bed.
“Come in” you said pulling your hair out of your face and tying it back
The door opens and you see Toru and he doesn’t look like himself, his hair is a mess, his eyes are red but hes not looking at you.
“You told me to come get my things” he said his voice sounding rough.
“I did” you said standing up and picking up the box from your desk
“This it?” He asked
“That should be everything, if I forgot something I’ll return it” you said
“I’ll let Iwa know, I wont be coming back here” he said “he can get whatever it is left”
“Right” you said nodding.
You looked at him holding the box. Your body itched with the need to throw yourself into his arms and not have it end like this. But you couldn’t bring yourself to do it. You watch him turn and leave. You end up spending the weekend alone in your room, thinking about your decision to end things. On Monday morning before school you decided to go on a morning run and while on your run you see most of the boys volleyball club running.
“Hey!” Iwaizumi said slowing to run over to you.
“Hey” you said stopping
“You okay?” He asked
“Not really” you said
“Wanna talk about it?” He asked
“No, not right now, maybe later” you said
“I’m here if you need me” he said “I’ve got to catch up but I’ll see you in class”
You sighed a little bit and headed back home to get ready for school; you really didnt want to go knowing that once word got out about the break up you’d get harassed and bombarded with questions. Not just from his fans but nearly everyone, and they all knew you had been dating not exactly easy to hide a relationship with him being as popular as he is.
You unwillingly walk to school trying to make it appear as though nothing had happened. Instead of meeting Toru at his home room and staying until it was time to get to your own. You go straight to your own and lay your head down on your desk, covering your head with your arms. When suddenly there was a light tap on your shoulder.
“Yeah?” You asked lifting your head up to see one of his fan girls
“Is it true?” She asked looking at you
“Is what true?” You asked
“That you broke up with Oikawa?” She asked
You look down “yeah, we broke up” you said
“If you still care about him, please consider getting back with him” she said
“What?” You asked your head snapping back up
“They had a practice game on Sunday and like I watched like I normally do” she said “I’d never seen him play the way he did that day”
“How do you mean?” You asked
“He couldn’t focus and his normally powerful serves were weak barely making it over the net and his sets were a mess” she said
“Did he really play that badly?” You asked
“Yes he did” Iwaizumi said from behind you
“Oh God” you said turning and looking at him
“He misses you” he said “a lot”
“Iwa, I didnt brake up with because I stopped loving him” you said
“I know” he said “just think about it”
Almost a week has passed its Saturdag and you were at the mall when you see a Takeru, Oikawas nephew he seemed to be lost.
“Takeru?” You asked approaching him
“Y-yeah?” He asked
“Do you remember me?” You asked
“You’re the girl dating Toru” he said
“That’s right, did you get lost?” You asked
“Yeah the crowd got really big and I got lost” he said
“Take my hand so you dont get lost again” you said holding out your hand
“Okay” he said taking your hand
“Who were you with when you got lost?” You asked
“Toru” he said “can we get ice cream?”
“Sure thing, let’s go to the ice cream shop and I’ll call him” you said
He nodded and you started walking with him to the ice cream shop. When you pulled out your phone and called Oikawa to your surprise he answered.
“Now’s not a good time” he said his voice a little panicked
“I have Takeru” you said
“You do? Oh thank goodness” He said relieved
“I found him at the mall, said he got lost in a crowd” you said
“Yeah…” he said “where are you?”
“I’m taking him to get ice cream, I can take him back to your house afterwards” you said
“Its okay I can come get him, I’ll meet you at the ice cream shop, I’ll be right there” he said and he hung up.
You get to the shop and its empty besides the people working. You get an ice cream cone for Takeru and yourself. You both take a seat at one of the little tables and eat your ice cream while waiting for Toru.
“Are you sad?” Takeru asked
“Hmm? No I’m fine” you said “just stressed with school stuff”
“But that’s not really it is it?” Oikawa asked
“That’s part of it” you said looking up at him
“Thank you for finding him and calling me” he said
“Of course, take care boys” you stand to leave
“Wait” Takeru said taking your hand “can you walk back with us?”
“Taker-” Oikawa starts
“Its, fine I can walk with you back to the house” you said “that’s okay right?”
Oikawa just nodded. Takeru finished his ice cream and wiped his hands with a wet wipe then took your hand.
“Let’s go come on” Takeru said pulling you towards the door
You follow him throwing away your napkin after finishing your ice cream. Once out of the mall you swing his hand that’s still holding yours, as he talks to you about school and his friends. Oikawa watches you smile and talk to his nephew. His heart hurt, he wanted to take your hand in his and kiss you. But you weren’t his anymore and he couldn’t do that.
You get to Oikawas house only to realize that he was yet again missing. Thankfully you had Takeru which is was the important thing. You knock on the door and his mom answered the door.
“Oh darling what are you doing?” She asked you
“I found Takeru at the mall he got lost, so I took him for ice cream and we met back up with Toru, and on our way here he disappeared again” you said
“Thank you again for the ice cream” Takeru said releasing your hand
He took off his shoes and walked further into the house.
“Thank you for making sure he was safe” she said “Would you like to come in for some tea?”
“Oh I dont want to intrude” you said
“Please I insist darling” she said
You walk in and take off your shoes and follow her into the kitchen.
“I know it must not have been easy spending time with Toru and Takeru, since I know you’re no longer dating my son” she said
“Not really, but Takeru insisted, and I’ve never been good at telling him no” you said
“Do you want to talk about the break up?” She asked handing you a cup of tea
“A little yeah” you said taking a sip. “I still love him so much, but he’s just recovered from hurting his knee and I found him over working himself after he promised me that he would take it easy”
She nodded and listened placing one of her hands on yours
“I dont want to see him hurt again, because I know how much volleyball means to him, and if he keeps getting hurt he’ll have to stop playing” you said “I just want him to take better care of himself…”
“He went through the box you gave him, and he was surprised that the necklace he gave you wasn’t there” she said
“I know, I kept it” you said and pulled the chain from under your shirt “I’m still wearing it”
“Why?” Oikawa asked you hadn’t heard him come in.
You turn to look at him on the verge of tears.
“Because I’m still in love with you Toru, that’s never changed” you said
“You broke up with me” he said
“Because I don’t want you getting injured again or to the point where you have to stop playing volleyball” you said “I know now how much it means to you, but you have to stop over working yourself”
“I was only staying late that one night because I had missed practice for two months” he said “I know Iwa and a few of my fans have talked to you”
“They have” you said
“So you heard about the pitiful practice game?” He asked
“Yes” you said
“You still love me, you said it your self right?” He asked
“Yes, I do” you said
“Then take me back, cutie, I love you so much” he said “I’ll take care of myself so I don’t get hurt, I’ll do anything I just need you back”
He had tears falling down his cheeks. You gently cup his cheeks and wipe his tears, bringing him down into a gentle kiss. He wrapped his arms around your waist pulling you close before slowly pulling away resting his forehead against yours.
“I’m taking that as a yes” he said
“It is a yes” you tease him
“Good” he said and he looked at his mom
“She can stay the night, I’ll call her mom” she said
“Thank you” you said
Oikawa led you to his room and laid down on his bed pulling you with him. The night was spent with cuddles, kisses and whispered ‘I love you’s. The next Monday at school things were back to normal walking to school with him attached at the hip when his team found out they were happy to have their captain back to his normal self.
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The Touch Of A Shay Sister
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Gif credit @cookiesordeath & @lorybest-aka-frizzza.
In the second gif I see Shay dancing like that at the readers reception.
Requested by @writerwithasoul. Hope you enjoy it. Thanks for the request.
Happy Reading Dollies.
Taglist. @nocturnalherb16 @jesseswartzwelder
Teasing Antonio was no problem. He would melt in your hand if you kissed or touched him in a sexual way. But for the last few days he's been off. Trying to avoid you and your touch. Something was up and you needed to know what.
"Oh babycakes"? You purred strutting over to Antonio's desk. He was concentrating on a file in his hand. His eyes never leaving the print.
"Antonio Dawson, you better look at me when I'm talking to you". You came up behind him. Your hands on his shoulders, massaging his tight muscles slightly whimpering in his ear. "God daddy, you're so wound up. Let me help you relax". Your hands started to travel down his chest. Feeling the ripples from his pecks and ribs. His body tenses up from your touch.
"Y/N"! Antonio scorned quite loudly as the others looked at him, oddly. You couldn't help but giggle.
"Stop. We are at work, you need to behave. I'm serious". Antonio jerked up out of his chair and  fixed his shirt aggressively.
"Well, someone didn't get the memo". You sucked on your bottom lip as yours and Antonio's eyes went down to the tent growing in his pants. He quickly covered it with his hands. A blush crept along his cheeks.
Licking your lips walking over to him. "This is what you get for teasing me and not holding up your end". The whisper in Antonio's ear sent chills down his spine. He wanted you so freaking bad but he made a promise to someone.
"Y/N Shay, you need to go do your work. Now". Antonio gulped as you faced him. His eyes fluttered down and saw your breast was inches away from his chest.
"Okay. If you say so, Mr. Dawson". You turned on your heels, your
hair hitting Antonio in the face. Your shampoo filling Antonio's nostrils, making him kick himself for turning you away.
The last couple hours were hell for Antonio. When he looked up, he didnt see you glancing at him or sticking your tongue out at him. Nothing. You were totally cold to him and he felt horrible because he couldnt tell you the truth.
When work was over Antonio rushed to his car, not saying anything to you. He put the car in drive and headed to the firehouse. That's what he couldn't tell you.
"Shay, I think I may have made her mad". Antonio was telling your sister Leslie about what happened at work.
"She'll be fine. She can withstand from sex for awhile". Shay laughed.
"Are you kidding? She is punishing me. Today she wore this sexy tight skirt with a white blouse and a black bra. To torture me. I couldnt do anything about it. I am so wound up when I'm around her.  I'm going to explode". Antonio paced the cement, chewing his bottom lip. His pants still just as tight with the tent in his pants, if not tighter.
"Oh gag. You want to marry my sister, right"?
"Yes. I love her more than anything". Antonio sat down at the picnic table in front of Shay.
"Then I think you two can stay away from sex so I can see that you're in this relationship for her and not her body. Y/N, is a beautiful woman and she needs to be loved for herself not her looks".
"I know. But I'm not like those other guys. I love her for her dorky, sassy and intelligent personality. We have fun together. The kids like her. We have the same friends and she practically lives with me. Why can I not marry her already? I have the ring"?
"You have a ring"? Shay asked shocked, Antonio and you only been dating for a year and a half. So it came as a surprise.
"It was my mothers. I've had it in my pocket since our sixth month anniversary. That's how long I've been wanting to marry her". Antonio reached into his pants pocket and pulled out a little diamond ring with a wedding band.
"Cute. So you're really serious about this"? Shay eyed him.
"Yes. More than I've ever been. Laura, she's didnt like the job so that's what didnt work in our relationship. But Y/N, she knows the job and what comes with it. She has my back and I have hers. Always. She gets me and I get her".
"Alright, Dawson. You can marry my sister but if you step one foot out of line. I'll turn the hose on you and then wrap it around your neck. Got it"?
"Got it.  I'm going to go marry my girl". Antonio gushed with a grin  jumping up from the table. "Thanks, Shay. You wont regret it". He yelled over his shoulder before getting into his car.
"I better not". Shay smiled as Antonio disappeared down the road. She was happy for the both of them and she wanted you to be happy. Antonio was a good guy and he had a great family. Lucky to have you.
Antonio pulled into his drive way and your car was parted in his spot as usual. He chuckled and got out, running to the door. His heart was beating rapidly from excitement. He opened the door and his smile dropped. You were sitting on the couch crying.
"What's wrong? What happened"? Antonio quickly dashed over to the couch. You kicked him away when he tried to get close.
"You dont find me attractive anymore". You wailed, tears falling down your cheek and onto Antonio's shirt you were wearing.
"Baby, that's not true at all. I love you and I think you're the most beautiful woman ever". Antonio took your left hand in his.
"Then why dont you want to sleep with me? I wore a sexy outfit today and nothing happened. The old you would have taken me in the locker room without a blink of an eye". You sniffled.
"Y/N, you may think this is stupid but it's for a good reason". Antonio started.
"What"?
"Shay, said that I had to abstain from sex with you". Antonio nervously chuckled.
"She what? You actually listened to her"? You growled, taking the closest pillow near you and hitting Antonio over the head with it repeatedly.
"Babe, babe. Stop. It's for a good reason". Antonio held up his hands, covering his face.
"It better be. I am so horny. I could kill you". You giggled settling back into your spot. Antonio laughed.
"I asked Shay two weeks ago if I could marry you but she wouldn't say yes.  Unless I resisted you. She wanted to make sure I was in the relationship for you and not your body". Antonio explained. Your jaw dropped to the floor.
"You- you want to marry me"?
"Yes". Antonio pulled out the ring and slid it on your finger. "Y/N Shay, will you marry me and make me the happiest man in the world"?
"Yes, oh yes, Antonio". You squealed, jumping into Antonio's lap. Wrapping your arms around his neck. Kissing his lips deeply in love.
"Aaaaaah. I love it, baby. Thank you. I cant wait to be your wife". You say between kisses.
"It was my mothers. I should've given it to you long ago but now seemed to be the right time. I love you".
"I love you too. So much". You kissed him even more.  All the passion and fury was coming undone.
"Let's go make up for lost time". You moaned into the kiss. 
"You read my mind". Antonio picked you up and started to carry you down the hall but you'd stopped him.
"Wait, you said she told you two weeks ago about not having sex. But you've only been acting weird for the last couple days". You tilted your head at him. You've been having sex.
"What can I say. I couldn't resist such a sexy, beautiful, intelligent woman sleeping next to me. The last few days have been hell not touching you. That wont happen again". Antonio playfully growled, nipping at your neck. You giggled as he carried you to the bedroom.
You got what you had wanted for so long.  Antonio Dawson to be your husband and for him to put his hands back on you.
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low-budget-korra · 3 years
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Lets talk about Korra (again)
i already made this analysis, and it was well received but i dont know, i wanna do it again. Why not right? My english is better now than was when i made that analysis so i think  this one will be better written
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What a way to introduce a protagonist. This line and this scene tell us everything we need to know about Korra at that time and everything she knew about herself.
In book one Korra is a 17′s old teenager who have no idea how the world, how life is outside the training center she grew up in and had been locked up since ever. So she is not only naive but have lack of social skills
Oh, and not everyone who lack’s social skills will act like Zuko and Azula okay? Korra can be confident, expressive and outgoing and still have problems when it comes to social skills.One thing dont exclude the other.
“I’m the Avatar and you gotta deal with it” did you guys notice that only for that line we can see the entire opposite on how she treat her role as avatar in comparisson with Aang? And im not here to judge because is two very different contexts.
As far as we know, Korra grew up without friends or romantic partners. Of course, she had her training partners but i believe that they are just that. 
So her entarely perception of herself was around her duty as Avatar, she didnt have personal life, she barely was Korra...She was The avatar and thats that.
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So she came to Republic City, it was a mess. 
Its funny to see that she have no touch when it comes to simply talk to people, i guess when you grew up away from society, this happens. And yes, she is cocky and had to learn that people arent there to somewhat please her, and she learned that quicky. 
Thats why the Pro Bending was important for her character, not only for training but also as means of socilization.
Now lets talk about the villains: Amon and Tarrlok
The two of them represents two differents threats to Korra. Amon represents a threat to her duty as Avatar while Tarrlok represents a threat to Korra as a person.
In episode 4 we have what i still thinks is the darker episode from TLOK. In this episode Amon ambushes Korra in the final moments... Even knowing that they did their best to make Amon’s power and control be non-sexualized as possible still...He have her down on her knews, totally helpless and he even invades Korra’s personal space by touching in her face forcing her to look at him. He didn't have to sexually touch her to violate her.
And right after, the fear in Tenzin voice when asking what happened after seeing her laying in the ground like that, and how Korra is sobing in his arms teeling him how powerless and helpless she felt. I mean...Oh, and she keeps terryfied by him until he takes her bending.
Tarrlok in the  other hand doesnt do much different from his brother and started to harass Korra because he cant take ‘no’ as a answer when Korra didnt wanted to join his task force.
Whats interesting is that if it wasnt for Tarrlok harassement and maniputation, Korra wouldnt have joined his task force and wouldnt have confronted Amon and wouldn't have gone through that terrible encounter.
The thing is that Korra is caught right in the middle of a politcal power dispute over the city, something that she for sure wasnt prepare for it. And both Amon and Tarrlok woud hurt or kill her without think twice about it if that means gain  power. And that was exacly what happened
Tarrlok tried to manipulate her and keep her on leash where he could, and when his tatics didnt worked anymore he alreay had a plan B. Yes that whole metal box in that cabin in the middle of nowhere was made especifically for her and maybe Tenzin if he also get in his way.
In the end Korra lost the physical battle against both but won the ethical battle also against both. She was the responsable for expose both of them as corrupted and hypocrites. But at what price? Amon was able to remove the bends of the Avatar. And without them, how could she be the Avatar?
Remember that her entirely conception of herself was built around her duty as Avatar, be the avatar. After all, everything she was, everything she'd trained so hard for, had been destroyed in minutes. Thats why i still strongly believe that she was thinking about killing herself at the end, nobodys goes all sad and crying to in front of a clifft without thinking about jumping from it. 
But she, i think given up the idea and just sit and started to crying when Aang appeared and help her, giving her bendings back in one of the best scenes of the show. So after have everything solve and still managed to get the boy she was in love with, things where great and she “move on”
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In that first half, Korra is unbearable. Everything she learned in Book 1 how to be more mature, less spoiled and all, was thrown in the trash and she was the same "child" of the book one only worse.
Until I stopped and realized that I was also unbearable and childish like this when I had my bad phases of anxiety and depression, as defense mechanism and keep people away. Returning to Korra, and if this way of acting of her was nothing more than this defense mechanism?
Because guess what, i dont think she “move on” from all that happened in Book One that fast, and for add more drama she discovered that was her father idea of keeping her locked up training in that training center we saw in book one and not traveling like avatars before her. No wonder she felt betrayed. And for adding even more drama, people still keep treating her like child, so she was despered for some validation. Something that she found in her uncles arms but she was betrayed by him after.
In the end, Korra again goes through a traumatic experience when she has her connection with past lives destroyed. We see how it affected her when she apologizes to Tenzin, through tears. And Tenzin, as the excellent master he is, tries to motivate her to face Vaatu again (now merged with Unalaq, her uncle) and again she saves the day even after go throught a traumatic event
In the final moments, we see the innocent decision to reconnect the world of spirits and the world of men. And we also see Korra and Mako permanently end their turbulent relationship.
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Book 3 begins in a more mature, we see all the characters being presented in a more mature way and it seems that Korra now has overcome everything that has passed. We have the relationship between Korra and Asami deepening as well
In Book 3, called "Change" we have a great sacrifice from Korra. Her life goes down a notch when she decides to save the new airbenders from Zaheer and the Red Lotus, the only villain until now that really threat her life since their sole goal was to kill the avatar.
Korra won again but this time victory costed way too much. Yes she save the day again but now she was  physically and psychologically defeated. It was too much, she broke.
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Book 4 begins and we only saw Korra in the final minutes and she is unrecognizable. We see that, once proud and courageous avatar, in someone depressed and cowerd. We never have saw Korra like that, even when she was afraid of Amon she wasnt like that.
Korra is afraid of being the Avatar again and her fight against PTSD is still one of the most sensitive, responsable and honest representation of Mentall Issues that i saw, and it was before this subject gain more space on media. It was before people started to give attention to this
I also think that she was having flashs from her other fights and not only the one against Zaheer.
Another thing I think is worth mention is that Korra took 3 years to feel safer and re-embrace her duties as Avatar. It was not 3 weeks or 3 months, it was 3 years. And anyone who suffers from some mental illness knows very well the stigma that is, the fight that is, because everyone wants you to be well faster as possible  when the truth is that many times you spend years fighting against this.  And this is a pressure that falls on you.Imagine, seeing all your friends moving forward while you continue "stock in the same place"?
Only after Korra confronts Zaheer, I think that was a way to show her coping with the trauma, she improves to the point of returning to be the great Avatar we know. I personally still struggles with this scene because put the victim in front of her agressor may not be the best idea but i understand that she needed to see that he was just a man and not the invencible monster her mind was telling her
One of the lines that stuck with me the most was in the TLOK version of the ember island players, the one that made a recap of the show before the finale. When Korra said “I was so naive” just before we watch her narration of her journey, we can feel pain, sadness and strenght. Janet was amazing in the way the delivered this line.
And this fucking quote i saw here on tumblr still is the goat: “The Last Airbender is a story of a boy who becomes a god. The Legend of Korra is the story of a goddess who becomes a girl "
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And I still get really pissed when someone comes to talk shit about  Korra because she is such an incredible heroine and her journey is also so incredible.
The story of how life can be hard and unfair, how it can hurt and paralyze, but there is always a reason to move on. We should always move on.
Korra is definitely not weak, quite the opposite, she is one of the if not the strongest heroine I have ever seen. Korra inspires overcoming 
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ninak803 · 3 years
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Long-distance relationships suck
So, some inspiration hit me last night & I wanted to get some good rest tonight so I had to write it down. Maybe my brain shuts up tonight.
Here is some O'Darwin for you!
Thank you @asunshinepuff for proof reading ❤️
All characters belong to @lumosinlove 🥰
~~
Alex looked at his phone as it started ringing. It was Finn.
“What's up?” he said, answering the phone.
“Hey Alex. Just wanted to give you a call. You good?”
Alex smiled. He and Finn haven't talked in a while, both of them pretty occupied with the ongoing hockey season, but talking with his brother was always a good thing.
“Yeah, sure. Bit busy, you know. How about you? Everything's alright? How are Leo and Logan?”
“We're good, really. Leo's in the kitchen, preparing dinner, and Lo is with him. I'm sure he's trying to distract Peanut but he’ll disguise it as helping him. So everything’s pretty normal.”
Alex could hear the smile in his little brother's voice, he could hear the love he had for his boys and he knew the look on his face when he talked about them.
He felt his heart clench. He was happy for Finn, of course he was. His little brother deserves the world, that much is sure, but he couldn't help it but feel a sting in his heart when he heard the happiness in his voice. That was because Alex partners where so far away and he missed Kasey and Nat dearly. He hasn't seen them in a while now as the hockey season was in full swing right now, as already mentioned.
They talked of course. A lot. But it was something totally different to actually be with them and everytime they ended the calls he needed some time to patch his heart back together.
To be honest: Long distance sucked. It really sucked.
Alex was so lost in his thoughts, he hadn't noticed the silence on the other end of the phone.
“Alex, what's wrong? Come on, tell me.”
“Why do you think something's wrong?”
“Well, for once you didn't send me any annoying snaps in 7 days now and besides I do know you. So?” his brother insisted.
Alex sighed. He didn't know how people around him could call Finn oblivious. He definitely wasn't when it came to Alex and he knew Finn wouldn't shut up until he told him. Maybe it was a good idea to talk about it.
“It's just… It's Nat and Kase. I miss them. Fuck, I miss them so much, Finn. And it hurts, like physically, you know?” Alex swallowed. 
Speaking it out loud didn't make it any easier, it just made it more true.
There was a short silence.
“I already figured out it might have something to do with them. Kasey’s have really been down the last few days. You know they miss you too, don't you?”
Alex nodded though Finn couldn't see it, so he said:
“Yeah, I know that. We talk a lot. It's not that I think they don't miss me or anything, that's not it. It's really only the fact that I miss them so much and I hate the distance and I hate hockey. No. Scratch that I don't hate hockey, of course. I only hate that we have so little time to see each other right now because of the season. And I know I should be happy to have these amazing two people actually love me, but right now it feels like everything sucks and I know it's wrong, but...” Alex rambled.
“Hey, it's okay to feel that way. It really is. I bet it isn't easy to be apart more often than not.” Finn said in a soft voice, then he laughed.
“I always freak out when Leo and Logan are gone for a couple of days, I really do. I'm sorry. I know it's different… Just… I want you to know it's okay. It sucks, yeah, but you three are so good for each other. You make them so happy, it's almost hilarious how Winter’s  face lights up when he mentions you, his goalie face isn't so unreadable anymore then.”
“Thanks, Finn. I know it's going to be okay. Its just a lot right now and, god, I hate being all this emotional.”
“Yeah, me too. But it's worth it for the right people. It really is.”
Alex sighed.
“I know.”
There was another moment of silence.
“Hey, when do you have the next weekend off?”
“In three weeks. Why?”
“Why don't you just pay them a surprise visit?”
That was a fantastic idea and Alex's mood lightened up immediately with the thought.
“Can you make sure they don't make any other plans?”
“Sure. We have a game that weekend, so they can't go anywhere. I won't tell them anything, I promise. Just… please don't do anything in the locker room, I don't want to walk in on you again.”
Alex laughed.
It happened some months ago. Alex was at Gryffindor to visit them. The thing between him, Natalie and Kasey was relatively new, but Finn already knew, thank god. He had watched their match, against whom he couldn't remember anymore, but it was a bad loss and he wanted to check on Kasey when everyone else was already outside and he still was in the locker room. So he went inside, where Kasey was sitting, still damp from the shower, wearing nothing but his towel. They talked for a while, but talking turned into kissing rather quickly, and that was the moment Finn chose to come back. All he could see was an almost naked Kasey and Alex with his hands on his bare chest, making out right there.
“Nothing happened there. I already told you.”
“Yeah, yeah. Sure. Mhm.”
Alex laughed again. 
Talking to Finn was a good idea.
~
Alex grabbed his bag and stepped out of the cab. He pulled the beanie more over his head, the wind was pretty cold and it was about to snow soon in Gryffindor, he could already smell the snow. He walked the two flights of stairs up to Kaseys and Nats flat fast, his heart beating fast but not from the little exercise.
He was standing in front of the door, trying to calm down. He was excited and maybe a little tired from not sleeping much last night.
After a short knock on the door it was opened by Natalie. She looked up at him, her facial expression changing quickly between confusion, doubt, and then, finally, happiness. A huge smile spread across her face. She threw herself at him and Alex pulled her in close, he wished he never had to let her go.
“Surprise.” he whispered in her ear.
Nat placed her hands around his neck, pulling him down a little bit so she could kiss him.
Oh, Alex had missed her.
He followed her inside, not letting go of her hand. She took his bag from him just to let it fall onto the couch.
“Why didn't you say anything? I could have picked you up from the airport! Oh, Kasey will be so happy. I can't wait to see his face.”
Alex pulled her closer again, his hands on her waist.
“I've missed you and I wanted to surprise you.”
“It worked. God, I'm so happy right now. I just thought about calling you, to be honest, but this is so, so much better.”
Her hand was on his cheek now, trailing his cheekbone gently. He looked into her eyes, slowly getting lost in them. 
Alex leaned down and placed another kiss on her lips, softly and innocent.
“Kasey is still at the rink. He'll be back soon.”
“Yeah, I know. I've talked with Finn.” he smiled and she flashed a smile back.
They went to sit down on the couch together, pushing his bag carelessly to the floor so they had the full length to stretch out. Natalie was lying in Alex's arms, her head on his shoulder, giving small kisses to his neck every now and then. Alex trailed his hand along her spine, up and down, holding her as close as possible. They were just lying there enjoying the proximity after being way too long without it. 
Alex could feel how the stress of the last days began fading away immediately. Kasey will be here soon and he really couldn't wait for him.
20 minutes later, 20 minutes he spent cuddling with Nat on the couch just holding her and listening while she was talking about her day, Alex heard the key in the main door. 
Natalie sat up on the couch and Alex did the same, looking at Kasey, who stared at him blankly.
“What… What the fuck?”
He walked over to them quickly, sitting down next to Alex and kissing him again and again.
Alex laughed under his lips.
“Slow down. I'm not going anywhere the next 2 days.”
But Kasey didnt stop and Alex was glad. He pulled him closer, their kisses becoming more passionately soon.
Kissing Kasey was different. Nats lips were all soft and she was gentle, Kasey was more forceful and Alex loved both. He loved Nats slim fingers in his and he loved to feel Kaseys rough hands on his skin. They were two totally different people and they were perfect for him, they made him feel complete.
“Aren't you going to say hello to me, love?” Nat said teasingly.
Alex felt Kasey smile under his lips and he let go of him a little bit. Kasey looked at Nat, both of them smiling. He leaned over to kiss her and Alex never wanted to be somewhere else.
Kasey sat back and looked at Alex, holding Nats hand now with his one hand and his other hand lying on Alex's thigh.
“Since when are you here?”
“Maybe half an hour.”
“Finn knew, didn't he? That’s why he was looking at me before he left, grinning like a maniac.”
Alex grinned at him.
“Exactly! That's the same grin!” Kasey exclaimed.
“ 'Course he knew.”
“ 'Course he knew.” Kasey repeated after him.
~
Alex and Natalie were in the stands, Nat wearing a Winter jersey, of course she did. Alex didn't though, he didn't want to bring any bad luck for his own team. He wasn't superstitious, but he didn't have to provoke anything.
It was last period, only 5 minutes left in the game. The Lions were leading with one goal, but it was a tough game. The opponent’s number 23 stole the puck from Finn, who didn't hesitate for a second and went after him. Probably beating himself up a bit for not blocking good enough, or for not shooting the puck to Tremblay, who was right next to him. Number 23 took the puck over the ice towards the Lions goal, passing it to his teammate. He had a clear shot on the goal, but Kasey saved it, catching it with his glove.
Cheers erupted from the fans, shouting Kasey’s name and Alex and Nat joined in.
Alex leaned down to her so she could hear him through the noise.
“I hate it when Kase gets that look, that stare when I come close to his goal. It freaks me out so much. He's unreadable, I swear.”
She grinned at him.
“It works.”
Alex nodded.
“Hell yeah, it does.”
The Lions won 4:2. Black made another goal in the last minute. Kasey looked up to where they were standing and both of them gave him a thumbs-up, smiling.
~
Alex sat next to Finn on a couch, Logan on his lap. They were waiting for Leo to drive home after the game and Alex waited for Kasey. More team members joined them, they were talking about the game enthusiastically. Natalie was standing aside, talking on the phone to her mom.
“Hey Harzy.”
Both, Alex and Finn, turned around to Kasey.
He stood next to Natalie, holding her hand, and smiled.
“I mean my Harzy.”
Alex got up and Finn pouted.
“Why am I not your Harzy? I'm your team mate. He's only your boyfriend.” Finn gestured at Alex and tried to look offended, but the smile on his lips gave him away.
Alex ruffled Finns hair.
“See you tomorrow.”
He walked over and gave Kasey a kiss on the cheek, which was still flushed from the shower.
“You did an amazing job out there on the ice, Kase.” Alex said and gave him another kiss, this time on the lips.
Alex loved them both. He loved them so much and he wished he could stay forever. But he knew he had to get back to Florida rather sooner than later.
He pushed the thought aside. The only thing he wanted to do now was to celebrate Kasey and spend time with the two of them, as long as possible.
Alex kissed Natalie, then took her hand and, laced together with their hands, the three of them made their way home.
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Our Little Secret
description: you and rudy have been sneaking around for a while now, what happens when you get caught in front of thousands of fans?😳😳
warnings: making out?? ooo and swearing oops (as a british person i can’t just NOT swear)
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            Rudy’s lips smashed against yours, moving hungrily as his arms snaked around your waist. You gasped, arms moving to hook around his neck as he slipped his tongue in your mouth. You had to be on set in five, and you were just passing the time with your good friend Rudy in his trailer.
Between the two of you, neither of you were quite sure what you were. So far, all you guys had done was purely physical. Of course, there had been lingering touches, longing stares, stolen smiles. But you hadn’t talked about it. 
It had started with flirty jokes, and then, boom! It just kinda happened, if you were being honest.
Not breaking the kiss, the two of you stumbled backwards until you bumped into the table. You jumped up and he took his pace between your legs, detaching his lips from yours and turning his attention to the skin on your neck. You moaned, heading rolling back to give him more access.
“Hey, Rudy? You in there?” Your eyes widen at the voice outside the trailer door, freezing both yours and Rudy’s movements.
“Uh, yeah?” Rudy says, clearing his throat.
“Why’s the door locked, toot?” You could practically see the suggestive smirk on Chase’s face.
“Cause I’m about to take a shit and I didn’t want anyone to come in here and smell that,” Rudy replies, looking at you with a grin on his face. You rest your head in the crook of his neck, pressing your face up to it to suppress your laughter.
Chase laughs. “Alright, then, but have you seen Y/N? I’ve been looking for her everywhere.”
“Nah, sorry bro,” Rudy calls out when you shake your head at him. “I’ve gotta take this shit or I’ll explode. See you in a sec.”
“It’s good, bro,” Chase replies. “She’s gotta be on set now, though. I’ll find her, don’t worry about it. Probably went off to craft services or something.”
You glare at the door where Chase is stood on the other end, but your eyes widen wen you realise you’re gonna be late to set.
“Cya, man,” Rudy says, helping you down from the counter as you pat down your hair. Chase mumbles a “bye”.
You two wait until it’s clear, giving Rudy a quick peck as you subtlety sneak out the trailer door once you’re sure Chase is gone.
As you walk - more like jog - away, you look back. Through the window you salute to Rudy, and he salutes back with a maniacal grin on his perfect face.
You’ve just finished shooting for the day, and straight away, you headed over to see Rudy. He’d slid you a note earlier in the day to meet him at his trailer once you were done.
Arriving, you were immediately pulled into a kiss by by the blond headed bimbo who’d stolen your heart. You smiled against his lips, happily thinking about the fact that you could finally call him yours.
Around two weeks ago now you two had finally sorted through your shit and admitted your feelings for each other. However, you’d both decided it would be better if you kept your newfound relationship to yourselves. You didn’t want to make things awkward if it didn’t work out, and, besides, sneaking around was fun. “Think of it as our little secret,” you had said.
You pulled away from the kiss and he pouted. Laughing, you pecked him on the cheek and watched as a smile took over on his lips. Rudy’s arms situated themselves around your waist as he laid the two of you down on the makeshift sofa in his trailer.
Rudy was lying on your lap as you played with his hair, occasionally kissing him as some stupid ass movie played on the TV. It was a nice breather from all the crazy scenes you’d been filming and you couldn’t feel more relaxed.
Well, that was until there was a knock at the door. You wasted no time in rushing into the bathroom, hiding as Rudy went to answer the door.
“Yo, dude,” you hear JD greet and you mentally cuss him out.
“Uh, hey, JD, Maddie,” Rudy says. “What’s up?”
“Why’re you being so weird?” Maddie questions, confused as to why Rudy seemed hesitant about letting them in.
“Me?” Rudy asks, shaking his head. “Nah, I’m not being weird.”
“Whatever,” Madison huffs. You hear her and JD walk in and mutter profanities under your breath. Thank god you had picked up your phone from the sofa or you would be toast. “We wanted to watch a movie and you have the comfiest couch.”
“What’re we watchin?” Rudy asks, bouncing on his heels. Madison shares a look with JD, confused as to what the hell was up with him.
“I dunno,” JD shrugs. “I gotta take a tinker in your bathroom, though. I’ll be right back.” He says, and your eyes widen.
“No!” Rudy calls out, and you search frantically for an escape route. There’s a window, but it’s kinda small, you’re not sure if you’d fit. Fuck it, you think as you hear JD and Mads confront Rudy about being weird.
“I just mean ... it’s kinda rank in there,” Rudy says, scratching the back of his neck.
“Disgusting,” Madison mutters.
“I’ll just block out the smell,” JD shrugs. “I’m desperate, bro.”
Rudy silently prays to himself as you fumble about the bathroom, climbing on top of the seat. You put one leg through the window as the footsteps land right outside the door, and  try to slyly maneuver yourself out with your phone in one hand. Your plan fails miserable and you tumble to the ground, landing in a bush.
“Fuck,” you mutter, sitting up and pulling leaves out your hair.
The door to the bathroom swings open and you run as fast as you can back to your own trailer. You ignore the confused looks of the crew members, and Drew calling your name as he sees you run past with twigs in your hair.
As soon as you get back to your trailer, you shoot Rudy a quick text.
I jumped out the window ;)
Jesus, Y/N. You good?
Yeah, just thank god for my super rad spy skills.
Sure, baby. Sure.
You giggle as Rudy pushes you down on your bed, peppering your skin with kisses, making you laugh more.
Filming had ended and you were currently quarantined with the cast, stuck in yours and Madelyn’s apartment. After the release of the show, you had gained quite a big fan base and your time had been occupied with online interviews and live streams. You’ve barely had the chance to sneak around with Rudy, not wanting to raise any suspicions since fans had already started shipping the two of you, pointing out the way he looks and interacts with you, and vice versa.
You didn’t want to let your friends catch on. Not yet.
Swiftly, you flip you and Rudy over, straddling him as you pull him in for a passionate kiss. You must not have heard the footsteps creeping up to your room, or the door swing open as you kissed your boyfriend.
A quick shriek alerted you of someone’s presence. You scrambled away from Rudy, cheeks red and eyes wide. It was Madelyn, stood frozen in the doorway, eyes wide. Clumsily, she dropped her phone, the object clattering to the floor
“Fuck,” Rudy mutters, pulling on his shirt as you put your hands over your face in attempt to hide you embarrassment.
Madelyn stands dead still, frozen to the spot. “Oh my god, guys, I am so so so sorry! I didn’t know you two were-”
By now, you had alerted the attention of Chase and Drew, who came running over at the sound of a scream. It didn’t take them long to connect the dots, between your rosy cheeks and swollen lips and Rudy’s messy hair and flustered appearance.
“Oh, shit,” Drew swore, eyes wide.
“Uh, guys ...” Madelyn spoke up, chuckling nervously. “I was on live and they saw ...” she motions between the two of you with her hands, “that.”
Honestly, you think you could’ve died, right then and there. You scramble to grab Maddie’s phone from the floor, seeing the comments screaming about what they had just accidentally witnessed and quickly end the live.
“I’m so sorry!” Maddie squeals, cheeks tinging red. “I was planning on scaring Y/N and I didn’t think Rudy would be in here, let alone that you two would be-”
You quickly cut her off, scratching the back of your neck and biting your lip. “It’s fine, Maddie. Seriously, don’t worry about it.”
“Yeah,” Rudy clears his throat. “You couldn't have known.”
“Uh, well,” Drew chuckles. “This is awkward.”
“Honestly, I’m gonna need a good few shots to erase the embarrassment of this moment from my memory,” you state, walking through the door and towards the kitchen where a bottle of vodka awaits you.
“I second that,” Rudy says, following you and lazily placing an arm around your waist.
Chase grins, watching the two off you. “So ... “ he trails off, gesturing between the two of you with his hand. “Are you two, yanno, together?” He wiggles his eyebrows suggestively.
You nod and Rudy smiles. “Yeah, we have been for a while now.”
“God, it’s about time!” Chase exclaims.
“You guys were pretty bad at hiding it,” Drew states, a grin of his own on his lips.
You mock fake offence, gasping as you poor the vodka into your shot glass. “We’ve been dating for four months, so, obviously not.” 
Madelyn’s mouth hangs open. “Four months?!” she yells. “And you didn’t tell us?”
Rudy shrugs, kissing your cheek fondly. “Eh, it was pretty fun sneaking around.”
“Agreed,” you say, smiling up at him. He meets your gaze, pecking you on the lips.
“Ew, you guys,” Chase groans. “Just because you’re together now doesn’t mean you can be all openly affectionate.”
Madelyn whacks his arm, rolling her eyes. “Shut up, they’re cute.”
“Nah, they’re gross,” Drew jokes, laughing. “Anyway, I made Mama Starkey’s casserole. Who wants some?”
“Me!” you exclaim, grinning excitedly. If there was one thing you loved it was Mama Starkey’s chicken casserole. Also, eating and drinking would be a good way to get your mind off the fact that practically the entire world saw you on top of a shirtless Rudy, making out with him.
A/N: AHAHAH THE WAY I DIDNT KNOW HOW TO END THIS SHDJSHJDH also pls excuse the crappy writing this was made at 4am last night😳
1K notes · View notes
9tzuyu · 3 years
Text
run into me sunday pt. ii
pt. i
notes: i am yet again projecting my own issues in fics lmao. this isn’t my favorite work, but i wanted to make a second part. this is the result. all mistakes are mine as im too lazy to proofread :P.
warnings: heavy talk of having an eating disorder.
requests are open!
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the first few of weeks at natasha's house were fine. you tried really hard not to think about all the changes happening. like being monitored 24/7, or having to abide by natasha's rules all the time, or knowing that you were growing to be healthy.
it was okay, at first.
you hardly put up a fight when it came down to her rules. even meal time seemed to go without a hitch.
but as many people have said before, all good things cone to an end.
the second you woke up today, you could already tell it wasn't going to be fun. everything you'd pushed aside came crawling back, and you could feel every insecurity of yours heighten a thousand times worse than before.
nat's arms rest gently around your waist, and while it normally felt reassuring, you couldn't help but notice the extra weight you'd put on.
you still felt overly full from last night. if natasha woke up right now, you were positive she could feel how expanded your stomach was.
(god, you did not want her to feel how bloated you still were.)
now you knew there was nothing wrong with having a stomach, especially one that wasn't flat or as unwell as yours had become. but it was your body, and your body felt wrong.
feeling natasha's breath on the back of your neck, you gingerly began removing her arm from your body. however, your plan quickly failed when natasha pulled you in closer, her grip tightening around you.
you bit your lip to suppress your cries. you needed out and you needed out right now.
things quickly became unbearable. the longer you felt trapped, the more your body began to tremble. and though you despised it, you turned around to face natasha, your head buried in the crook of her neck.
the thoughts were loud. much louder than they had been the past few weeks.
you tried to keep your cries to a low level, but that didn't seem to work. natasha awoke within the very same minute. her first instinct was to check on you, but seeing as tears were streaming down your face she knew what the problem was.
nat pulled you closer to her, letting her right hand rub the backside of your body in an attempt to calm you down.
"hey now, it's okay, it's alright. you're okay, you're safe, you're here. i'm here." you continued to sob, letting every detail of your own self hatred slip from your mouth.
natasha wasn't surprised at the outburst. she knew you would have days like this, more days would soon follow. that was reality. she didn't expect your recovery to be perfect, if it was then she would know you weren't really getting better – simply putting on weight to please her.
she couldn't take away your pain (although she wished she could), but she could be there, offer you her love and support, coax you through meals when you needed her to.
when you'd finally calmed down you turned away from her, suddenly embarrassed at how you acted. she could feel you tense back up again, a failed attempt at blocking her out.
it was nat, who were you to think she couldn't read you like an open book?
nonetheless, she kissed the back of your head and moved out from under the covers. "i'm going to make breakfast, i'll be back."
you sighed. breakfast was not an option.
but 15 minutes later natasha returned with a plate of eggs, toast and a cup of fruit on the side. she even made it all pretty and nice for you.
“up, y/n. i know you don't want to, but you have to eat.”
"no," you mumbled, bringing the blanket over your head. she tugged them away instantly, "yes."
"it's too early."
"you didn't say that yesterday-"
"well i'm saying it today, natasha. now fuck off."
natasha knew better than to take your words to heart. if anything, she found it rather entertaining to see just how far you'd go to try and push her buttons.
an idea came to mind, a negotiation, really.
"tell you what, no breakfast, but you have to eat lunch and three snacks between dinner."
you thought about it for a second before peeking from underneath the covers, "deal." natasha patted your side, "i'm only doing this because you've been doing so well these past few weeks. don't count on this deal happening again." she spoke thoroughly, the plate of food now on its way into the kitchen trash-bin.
while you laid in bed natasha texted wanda. the redhead thought it would be beneficial for the younger woman to pay a visit. she knew how close the two of you were and decided to invite her over. it wasn't much, but the idea of wanda coming over and (possibly) helping you in any shape or form was very reassuring to natasha.
wanda texted back almost instantly, informing her that she was just short of an hour out, having to stop for gas on the way. natasha thumbs up'd her message and began planning out the day.
before either of you knew it, it was 12 noon. lunch had approached sooner than expected. wanda and natasha easily got caught up in a conversation. the only thing keeping time was nat's alarm that set off.
"time to go wake y/n up," natasha giggled, although she knew you'd be a challenge today. wanda followed her, too excited to wait on surprising you with lunch.
"y/n! c'mon, a special someone is here to see you."
a groan could be heard from the bed as you up to see who was there. you smiled at the sight of wanda and she immediately brought you in for a squeeze-the-life-out-of-you hug.
you didn't miss her smile faltering when she let you go.
you were still just as boney and thin as you were when you left the compound. three weeks was nothing, but you swore you could feel every ounce of weight gain coming back.
wanda helped you out of bed, allowing you to lean on her as she guided you into the kitchen. it was a good thing too, because you were more light headed than usual.
"what are you doing here?" wanda smiled and pushed the already prepared plate of food towards you. it'd been a few minutes and you hadn't even touched your fork. "what? couldn't surprise you?" natasha giggled from your left. you already seemed to be in a much better mood with wanda around than you had been this morning. but both women caught onto the fact that you were only shoving the food on your plate, not making any effort at all to actually eat it.
nat tucked a piece of hair behind your ear, "you have to eat, you know the deal we made." her push was soft, but it didn't make things any easier.
you sighed, tightening the grip around your fork. things like this shouldn't be so hard. it was food. food is fuel, food is good, but somewhere in your mind those messages were twisted and crumpled into something that could never be more false.
you leaned into natasha, keeping your face shielded away from the plate. tears sprung into your eyes and you begged for her to not make you eat.
"tasha, just one day, please. i promise i'll eat tomorrow-"
"i wish that were true, i really do, sweetheart." nat rubbed your shoulder before pushing you back, forcing you to look her in the eyes. "i'm going to go grocery shopping and run a few extra errands. wanda will be here to watch you finish your meal and to have a snack or two before i get back. i love you, okay?"
(you knew she did. but holy fuck, why did she have to do this to you.)
"yeah, you too." and with that, natasha grabbed her keys, kissed you on the forehead and left.
you don't know why, but you didn't actually think wanda would listen to natasha. that belief was quickly thrown out when you moved to get up from the table, wanda quick to grab your wrist and stop you from going to far.
"stay. please? just a few bites, i won't tell natasha if you don't..." she pleaded. a feeling of safety grew in your chest. your level of trust with her had always been high, but this time it felt more intimate. wanda was seeing you at your worst, a vulnerable position you'd never let anyone else but tasha see, and yet, wanda decided to stay.
it took over an hour for you to manage half a meal. wanda sat through it all, however, and coaxed you through each bite.
now, two hours later with a snack in hand, you sat quietly on the porch, head resting on wanda's lap with her fingers tied in your hair.
"do you talk to nat?"
"sometimes. actually yeah, most of the time i talk to her. it helps, and she's a great listener." you complimented.
"wanda?"
"hm?"
"why are you doing this?"
wanda looked down at you, seeing your eyes bore into her and bit her lip, "it's hard to see the girl that i loved and the girl that came back. i should've noticed before you went on your mission, but i didn't because i was too wrapped up with my own issues."
"you can't blame yourself, wanda. i didnt want to be seen. you couldn't have done anything different."
she hummed, ears perking up at the sound of natashas car pulling in the driveway.
you jumped up from her lap and ran to help tasha with her groceries, earning a loving glare from the redhead.
oh yeah. no strenuous activity. too many calories that you needed would be burned off. at least that's what you were told anyway.
wanda stayed the rest of the day, even through dinner. (only because you begged natasha to let her stay that long.)
natasha didn't seem to mind that she stayed. the redhead heard more laughs and giggles from you than she'd heard in the past six months.
the worst part about the day ending was the fact that wanda had to leave eventually.
(eventually being now.)
you pouted. you weren't ready for her to go just yet.  she'd taken your mind off of so much today and you weren't sure you could face it again. really, you didn't want to face it again.
"i believe in you." she murmured.
stupid mind reading.
wanda rolled her eyes, "i'm serious, y/n. you've got this. you're amazing."
“you're only saying that because you have to.”
her eyebrows pulled together. "no. i'm saying it because i know it's true. you've got a gift, y/n. what you have– you're going to get it back."
you inhaled.
"next time i see you, i want you to be a little bit more healthy, okay?" wanda gave you a tight hug and left without another word. she just hoped the next time she saw you it wasn't in a casket.
you hoped the next time you saw her, you'd be better.
today wasn't easy, but it gave you a taste of everything you'd been missing.
and you wanted it back.
181 notes · View notes
icecreamkink · 3 years
Text
watched all of the untamed / cql in two weeks after my friend 1 told me abt mdzs a hundred years ago and my friends 2 and 3 tried to get me into cql for like two whole years and there are.
feelings.
very first scene is a very dramatic death in the middle of nightmare battle on sith planet land . i will forget abt it in the next tenish episodes and then will be very surprised when it becomes Extremely Painful
anyway magic flying gays and possession and human sacrifice! we are off to a great start
in retrospect, chaos goblin wei wuxian must have had a blast pretending to be so cRaZy and be as disruptive as he could as mo xuanyu lbr
listen. why is fire always evil coded. cant a magic clan wear red, black and orange and have flame motif while being wholesome?
For Legal Reasons These Are Not Zombies
i wish the politics of the sect were a bit clearer, especially at the beggining when the wen clan had sm power, was wen ruohan the chief cultivator? is that why they were so slow in responding to the attacks? im v confused by the pre yiling patriarch politics
fighting in the roof by the moonlight as way of flirtiiiiiiing. as i understand this is a wuxia/xianxia trope and honestly...... thank u for ur service
slight bullying and being a nuisance in general, as a way of flirting we love to see it
wwx: if i drink on the rooftop, thats not inside the cloud recesses! hmmm check and mate :D lwj: i will fuck u up so help me god   wwx: :0
i lov them
through hell or high water (quite literally) wei wuxian rem ains a trashfire gremlin till the end and i love him with my whole heart
in the pt subs wei wuxian calls jiang cheng a stubborn duck and i dearly wish that had come back
my opinions on almost every character goes from love to hate u - Hmm Me Like U - BABY. ILY. and i am Very Pleased w that. its been a while since i loved such a complete cast so much i think
no really. i WONT go into a detailed rant abt what i love about each of these characters and each of their relationships to each other. but i COULD. 
some lan disciples in the loudest whisper ever: YEAH THATS THE JIN BASTARD MENG YAO HEARD THE GOT SUPER HUMILIATED BY HIS DAD LOL SURE HOPE HE DOESNT TAKE SLIGHTS TO HIS CHARACTER TO HEART
lan xichen, immediately: i must Love him 
being into problematic ppl is in the Lan genetics, we come to realize
wen qing deserves so many awards for so many things but not snapping and just stabbing wen chao is at the top 
that scene at lan qirens class where wwx talks about using resentful energy to fight a violent spirit. exquisite.
 It establishes Good Student lan wangji, wei wuxian as curious and questioning and not afraid of taboo,  lwj sees that wwx is not, in fact, a dumb ass hes just a Dumbass,  shows us the audience (esp. a western audience) how shocking the idea of disrupting the dead/dying and controlling resentful energy actually is,  the theoretical foreshadow arguing, everyone else like ‘shUT UP’,  “and how could you ensure that the resentful energy would obey you and not hurt other?” “well i havent thought that far” and of course, lan qiren just straight up lobbing a hard object at wwx head,. chefs kiss
fellas is it gay to bother the hot rule obessessed nerd from ur school and make drawings of him with flowers in his hair and then hide gay porn in his book to antagonize him and ask him to hold ur hand and be ur friend and talk to him all the time and get him drunk and give him bunnies bc you know he likes them and give him a lantern and always want his attention and dedicate yourself to getting him to smile-
and after all of that wwx rly said oh i Admire him, aksd like yeah we all were there in high school buddy
i have Learned. caves = gay.
 accidental marriage +beint physically tied together with the sacred married ribbon+ gay panic+foreshadowing+bunnies! in the cave (1)
the story abt lan yi and baoshan sanren tho. i would like to see it
early days wen bros pull my heart strings like a guqin 
EVERYTHING about the lantern scene; disaster hets jiang yanli and jin zixuan; how wwx made lwj a bunny lantern. how soft and touched lwj was. wwx gleefully pointing out he was smiling and lwj IMMEDIATELY PULLING HIW SWORD ON HIM LMAO. tragically foreshadowy promises to do right by pepople, living without regrets. lwjs 'oh no do i love him??' face. just. all of it. 
i have it on good acc that in the novel lwj is explicitly Repressed Gay Panicked Big Horny which is delightful and rly Adds to the performance
 baby lwj is really just conceal dont feel dont let them know u have EMOTIONS (derogatory)
jiang cheng rly went "why dont.u go play with HIM if u like him so much"
jc and wwx have big BIG annoying sibling energy dont think too hard abt it or youll cry
lotus pier is soo pretty :((((((((((((((((
up until episode 13 you could think this could be a magical ancient chinese gays pride n prejudice w swords and shenanigans ................youre just not prepared for the game of thrones of it all
seriously ha ha ha i cried so much w this show my eyes genuinely swelled up . like. physically. fun timez fun timez
that being said, its hilarious that wen xu goes to cloud recesses like 'come out or ill kill all these hostages' and then DOESNT WAIT FOR AN ASWER AND KILLS THEM ALL IMMEDIATELY. do u know how blackmail works sir
 would like to make it recorded that from day one i was like 'CALL A GODDAMN CULTIVATION G20 THIS ASSHOLE SECT IS LITERALLY MASSACRING YALL!!' and it took them like 3 or 4 massacres to do anything and they STILL sent their heirs into their territory  LIKE
when wwx cites the gusu lan rules to wen chao tho. that rebel/attention whore/cutie pie 'look lan zhan i DID memorize the rules after all' ‘also a big fuck you to the wen sect :D :D’ sweet spot that scene achieves . delicious
all the cultivator young masters being petty af even though they are practically prisoners at the cave is hilarious and i love them
hurt and comfort + gay mistunderstandings + watsonian gay declaration music + accidental evil acquisition! at the cave (2)
its like where do i start? the fact theyre both trapped and kind of heavily injured inside an isolated cave with a murder turtle? wwx gay panicking lwj into coughing up bad blood? lwj being jealous as wwx babbles abt mianmian? telling him he shouldnt play with people and wwx saying he never played him? wwx going Oh. I See what is happening. YOU like mianmian, and lwj absolute done face ??? (iconic) wwx touching the sacred married ribbon Again? the telepathic communication? the sword? WEI WUXIAN ASKING LAN WANGJI TO SING TO HIM AS HE IS PASSING OUT AND LWJ SINGING HIM. THE SONG. HE WROTE. FOR WWX. AND THAT HE CALLED. THEIR SHIP NAME????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????
they are SO insufferable pleeeeease
in the words of my friend 1 : “CQL is so gay we were all amazed how it got past the censors Ofc unfortunately it can't be novel level gay But they did their best And we love them for it”
in the theme of songs THIS OST. WUJI HAS BEEN LIVING IN MY MIND RENT FREE SINCE I FIRST HEARD IT the whole ost is so so sO beautiful.
 the costuming in this is also soooo exquisite. the embroidery? the fabrics? the details? how every sect and clan has a distinct style and architecture? (also ik they based each off of dif periods in chinese history which is REALLY fucking cool) just chefs kiss
the direction too!. i enjoy the unusual camera movements and i think they give it that Vibe, also their composition is PARTICULARLY good when it comes to telling the subtext through position of camera/position of character (like nhs off to the side in scenes he at first glance doesnt need to be/ how lwj is often centered when hes Jealous Yearning at wwx being affectionate w other ppl, wwx return from burial mounds etc)
ik madam yu is like Badass Milf Check and shes not getting any mom of the year awards but im delighted at how messy she is. IMAGINE that woman on tiktok
you better have enjoyed gay cave (2) bc its Just Pain from here on out! 
jiang fengmian and madame yu win the Most Dramatic Way to show they do care about each other, actually ..... ever :)
i thought jiang yanli jiang cheng and wei wuxian forcing themselves to escape yunmeng barely holding on after their parents are killed was going to be the height of pain in this show. ha. 
the family dynamics in general on this showwwww, both blood/ adopted/ found families, brotherly bonds and lifelong friendships just. rly. truly. fucked me up. theyre all so important and complicated and well rounded and beautiful and tragic
and beyond being a Win For the Gays im so glad the relationships w wwx and jiang yanli/ wen qing were NOT changed from platonic bc they are so much better like that imo. like maybe if we didnt Live In A Society it wouldnt be so, but the fact wwx and others can love and value them so much and theres nothing romantic or sexual abt it is like. so refreshing. especially @ jyl, with the way he and jc are overprotective of her and shes such a nurturing/care taker figure for them, it would just not vibe as well if they made it romantic
i love that this is a story abt Wei Wuxian, the Yiling Patriarch aka Actual Satan/Boogey Man/Village With/Public Enemy Number One , my dude is literally a necromancer who only dresses in black and has evil smokey black tendrils wafting out of him, but the really edgy one is still jiang cheng, pastel purple fashion icon
and speaking of best/worst siblings wei wuxian and jiang cheng *immediately starts crying* 
The Golden Core Transfer i just. no thots only tears 
wen qing and wen ning putting themselves in so much danger just.... to help them. wn saving jc from wen chao. wq finding a way to get wwx to transfer his core. like thinking about the monumental work these two did to help wwx and jyl and jc... jyl trying so fucking hard to be strong and keep on moving and giver her little brothers comfort after losing everything... jiang cheng. losing his parents and his home and his ability to do anything abt it and his complete desperation and lack of self worth and turning on them with agression  when he didnt realize all that they did for him ... hhhhhhhhhhhhh
me, pointing at the whole cast “i just LOVE them mom!!!”
its sad tho, that BARELY ANY of the women have like.... actual important conversations let alone relationships with each other at all in the story. and like wq and jyl have stayed at the same place for extended periods of time, where wq actively took care of her TWICE,  and still! not one measly convo, nothing! ................ .𝓌ₕᵧ
everyone in this show need a good sip of Self Worth and Stop Sacrificing Yourself juice 
ngl the sword flying looks very dumb 
“a-cheng, please bring a-xian back.” “i will, i promise.” ;-;
the whole calling each other by the More Intimate Version of the name, first as teasing and later as true intimacy. mmmhmmm yes
untamed where everythings the same but wwx evil flute song is eoeo
related that scene when wwx comes back from the burial mounds for the first time w demonic cultivation and he acts all formal and calls lwj hanguang-jun and keeps being evasive and distant and mean and soooooo................. facetious 
and how hes kind of desperately trying to keep intense lwj at bay (A FIRST) and avoiding actually talking to either of them and its all tension ughhh and then he MOCKS his and lwjs relationship, he jokes w him in this like... mean echo of their usual ~banter~ oof 
 and like!!! uncertain but so relieved jc who just HUGS him w no reservations for once and its not like he isnt just as worried as lwj abt wwx and what hes doing, but he chooses in that moment to enjoy getting him back first and mmhmMMMmMm yes (maybe my favorite scene in the whole show? MAYBE SO. ) 
highkey hurt me but also. i might be into mean wwx. i will take no criticism.
lan zhans sad eyes tho :((((((((( 
on one hand i wish we could have seen what happened at the burial mounds but on the other the timeskip adds so much flair to his return so im hnnn
also i love that hes been missing for 3 months reappears kinda melancholic and bloodthirsty and knowing malign tricks and jc is like 'so. are u sad bc of lan wangji'
when ur bae survived the war but he thinks ur evil/ might be evil so you cant kiss :///
hmmm talking at the rooftop under the moonlight not mentioning everything that stands between usssss
they are the two jades of lan and we’ll be the two heroes of yunmeng is the type of line u dont even need to know whats gonna happen to know thats gonna be sad
when they fight wen ruoshan at the nightless city i thought that was the battle we see at the first ep and its not and its so easy and theyre all like ‘yayy we won go wwx!’ i was just. SCREAMS WHAT is gonna HAPPEN
so like. post burial mounds/sunshot campaign pre yiling patriarch wwx is like. ultra arrogant, ultra mocking, peak lil shit and it gave me e v e r y t h i n g i wanted
even tho having the wen prisoners at the targets at phoenix mountain and still having wwx and jzx shooting the arrows was???? so.... tone deaf 
wwx: fucking w demonic energy   jyl: he has never done anything wrong in his life, ever <3 <3 (mood)
the parallels between meng yao/wei wuxian (and even xue yang a bit?) are Seen and they are Valid
wwx post burial mounds: can yall SHUT UP abt the goddamn sword (suibian left the chat)
LIKE truly, we talk abt the angst and yearning with wangxian. but what abt wwx and suibian. xianbian / xianqing angst and comfort 100k
take a shot everytime someone coughs up blood
zidian is simply the coolest spiritual weapon rip to suibian and chenqing and bichen and sendou and baixa........ but tis the truth 
cons: everyones families died in a nightmare war! everyones homes burned to the ground! everyone is traumatized! pros: everyone gets cooler clothes and weapons!!
wen ning and a-yuan and yanli bestest babes squad dont touch me rn
everyone: brooding and fighting                                                                wq and jyl: why dont you try some acupunture/drinking some soup and calm down huh? how abt that bitch?? 
showing the battle/massacre at the nightless city first was genius actually bc then everytime we have a cute scene w yunmeng bros and theyre like 'we'll be together forever! uwu' youre like oh. oh no. oh no no no. 
justice vs lawfulness vs means and ends 👁
jc: stay in the right path and practice the art of the sword                        wx: yeah thats not gonna happen chief
my reaction to wwx renouncing to the sect politics to help the wens was just that elmo burning gif in succession
the dramatic rain. wen qing desperately calling out to wen ning. the ghosts/puppets killing the guards. how terrifying wn actually was while wwx was controlling him :( lwj goeing after him to try and stop him and then he just; he Sees him and understands him even if he cant actually do anything about it other than let them go. 
“there must be somewhere in this earth we can go to :(((((((((”
"IF I HAVE TO FIGHT THEM, I'D RATHER IT BE YOU. DYING BY YOUR HANDS WOULD AT LEAST BE WORTH IT." oh my god oh my god oh my goooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooddddddd
also lwjs umbrella is white w black smoke.. .  . nice
yiling patriarch / demonic farming burial mounds settlement is like one of my favorite concepts. they an "EVIL" FARMING COMMUNITY LED BY THE VILLAGE WITCH COME ON
they planted TURNIPS and LOTUS FLOWERS and ONE (1) baby and made lanterns and a common hall :(((((((
wen qing and wei wuxian, baddest bitches and genius science best friends i absolutely LOVED to see it. they rly went ‘is anyone gonna sibling/project partner that’ and didnt wait for an answer
both wwx and jyl getting lotus ponds at the burial mounds and in lanling bc they miss lotus pier ;;;;;;;w
;;;;; wish jyl had actually gone into the burial mounds. we were robbed of jyl and wq meeting again and jyl meeting a-yuan and seeing the settlement and the homes and all ;w; at least jc did go, stab wounds and broken arms and all
wwx like... having thrown his whole life away to help the wens (yeah the sect leaders and jin guangshan in particular wanting his stygian tiger amulet was an Element but still) and not.... necessarily regretting it, but grappling with all of the consequences of it... becoming moody and drepressed at times, missing his family and lotus pier and his friends and probably simply missing being around people and causing trouble, extrovert that he is, lashing out at the wens and at a-yuan, just in general the whole messiness of that experience
the way the resentful energy does affect his temperament is rly nice bc its not too in your face,(i mean outside of the Shaky Hands of Rage) but like he clearly has a much lesser control on his anger and impulsivity (tall order) than both before bm and after hes ressurected
on that note A-YUAN BABIEST BABY BOY BEST BOY
lan zhan being like oh hey there wei ying fancy meeting u and our son here. just passing by u know how it is hmmmmMm and then PLOT TWIST having defied orders to go see him and being punished for it. oof;;
 they habent seen each other in like? a year? and now theyre tgt 10 seconds and are already parenting a child together
also lwj rly kneels down in the snow way too much to be healthy
wwx: calm down guyssss i wont lose control of demonic cultivation omgggg  .   spoiler alert: he loses control of demonic cultivation
did u enjoy cute children? good bc now the Real Pain Begins
jiang yanli and jin zixuan rly out there APROPRIATING both disaster gays AND bury ur gays huh ;w;
i KNEW jin lings birthday was gonna fuck something up but the GASP that left my body when wwx lost control of wn and killed jin zixuan .. . . 
im sorry and thank you aaaaAAAAAAAAAAaaaaaaAAAAaAAAAA 
when wen ning and wen qing were telling wwx their plan i was saying NO NO NO NO NO NO out loud in despair 
also can we talk abt how wq is definetely talking about only the both of them surrending themselves but then? everyone else just surrenders w them? IT MAKES NO SENSE LIKE WHY WOULD THEY what would be the Point
 sometimes there are some pretty gaping jumps in logic and continuity that are just like                     ?          ?
wwx: oh so when you try to murder me its justified but when i survive through dark magic and murder all of you its a "war crime"
unsurprisingly, his most feral, most spiraling moment talking to the sect leaders on the roof and attacking them and even fighting lan zhan is among my favorite scenes... its like, so painful to watch but also   so       thrilling   (and maybe my wen bbs dying arose some resentful energy in me what can i say) 
and its JUST, all they ever wanted was to do good but then... war. and trauma. and hubris. 
jiang cheng on the ground clearly thorn between what to do and feel is a Mood, lets just say
i was already crying when jyl showed up, but if i wasnt-
 i suffered SO MUCH through this series trying to figure out WHY jc would kill wwx. and when i understood. its somehow not as bad as i thought and also MUCH MUCH WORSE
a look into my group chat during the last flashback episodes:
Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media Tumblr media
SO ANYWAY. after the BLOOD BATH and RIPPING YOUR HEART OUT and FEEDING IT TO YOU  the untamed goes ‘ayy back to the present!! tu du dud ud du’ 
literally it ends a quarter into an episode and then KEEPS GOING i had to pause and stare blankly at the ceiling for an hour
babie cultivators and detective soulmates . i do need some cute after All of That 
(not that the pain is over LOL)
lwj is significantly less emotionally repressed in the present and its delightful. hes just ALL IN with wwx. and not just in the ‘i would and have killed various men and risked my reputation for you’ but also ‘ur tired here have a drink i brought it up cause i know u like it and it want you to be happy, always’
“when everyone praised me and wanted my power, you were the only one that challenged me. now that everyone hates me and wants me dead, youre the only one that stands by my side.” hhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhnnnnnnnnnnnnnn 
and just filling in the blanks how lan zhan searched for him. for all of those 16 years he searched for him and was punished for it and raised a-yuan, the only survivor of the burial mounds settlement, as his own in gusu......
and jiang cheng.  being the tough love uncle . having raised the yunmeng jiang clan from the rubble all alone, his whole family dead, some of it on the blame of his own brother, his siblings, his closest friends gone.......and only jin ling there needing his guidance. 
THE PARALLEL BETWEEN JIN LING BEING A LIFELINE FOR JIANG CHENG AND A-YUAN FOR LAN WANGJI AFTER THE BATTLE AT THE NIGHTLESS CITY  
great now i made myself sad
and like . the fact! that lwj and jc dislike each other!!. jc projects blame onto him for wwx both “leaving” him and indirectly causing their families deaths and when hes so consumed by it he makes wwx an enemy, lwj is there now? trying to protect him?? and lwj, who can never understand the pain that wwx , indirectly or not put jc through, but who was right there when jc tried to kill him and will never allow him to hurt wwx again. and how they like. in a way project blame of their tragedies onto each other while dealing with some type of survivor guilt and in their own way still loving wwx through it all???  amd in way its kind of fundamentally selfish but also tragically understandable? and like when u put it against the fact that after he disappears during the sunshot campaign they were looking for him together and fought together??
JUST. THE CHARACTERS. AND THE RELATIONSHIPS IN THIS. MAN. UGH. GOD. 
and like i think thats what makes it so good? its such a sad and painful and violent story, edgy even, but its compelling bc at the center of it there are all of these relationships and different types of love and hope and. :( i love it
enough crying lets talk abt wwx sleeping at the jingshi with lwj and wearing his under garment for a minute 🙏
 jin ling just has that Was Raised by JC energy tho lmao i love him
babie cultivator squad is the perfect ammount of cute and comedic relief while still bearing the weight? of the narrative in a way, both from sizhui and jin lings existences, and also. like. how do i put this. they feel hopeful? they were born after a war, they came of age at a time of relative peace, they dont hold on so closely to the resentments of their parents/father figures, they are specifically shown as more accepting and open minded. and its like.... Hope for the future  
one of the ?? things  i love the most is the fact that the main cast are often in situations where theyre hunted/running but they like. never wear disguises... just going around in their gorgeous expensive clan clothes and hair ornaments and distinctive spiritual weapons.... maybe w a straw hat on, just for kicks
wwx teacher 🥺🥺🥺
so this is why its called Yi City Misery huh
a-qing is such. an icon. im so sad. my girl even knew to leave xys dumb self rotting by the road but no one listens to her thats why theyre all dead or sad 
her and xue yang measuring each other up was so entertaining lmao
 its the funniest thing when hes like. HERES MY SAD STORY. FOR WHY IM A SADISTIC MURDERER. I BROKE MY HAND ONCE. 
like ok someone broke his hand in a horrible way, and like Poverty, i get it but also like.......... that lost the brunt of a proper sob story like, 50 sadistic murders ago bby
and i love that xingchen does not entertain that for a second hes like ‘not ?????? good enough???’ and the best thing is he wasnt even like 'u hadto be the bigger person' or sth but ' well then break that dudes hand back, rip his arm off for i care, what do the rest of us have to do w anything???” 
anjo sensato :(
xue yang is like..... the sexy sadistic evil version of a himbo..... a meanbo...
the fucked upness of xy’s feelings for xxc/ xxc and sl feelings for each other... like my dude literally gave his bf HIS EYES. and xy getting so attached to xxc .... the fucked up fake domesticity.... having him hurt sl..... then desperately trying to bring him back ...................... oof
song lan........... literally had his eyes AND tongue removed, his bfs eyes put in place, was almost killed, turned into a puppet by his bf unknowingly, manipulated by xy, sees his bf killing himself in despair.... and STILL finds the strenght to get up from there, and keep on traveling and helping people and attempting to fix xxcs soul.......... like, my man. damn. 
wangxian looking at songxiao and seeing an Actually more painful parallel for themselves. ft. that Color Coding. 
THE A-YUAN/SIZHUI REVEAL PUNCHED ME IN THE HEART but in a good way for a change
should have know that he would be the Best Boy the cute one w all the braincells
the butterfly AND the bunny lantern. i see how it is
u know is very convenient that no one can see the stark black veins on wen nings neck, ever 
BAT WEN NING 
wns face when lwj comes into wwx room like ‘:0 omg did u two finally get your shit together? good for you master wei good for u’ 
(they didnt) (yet)
DISASTER DRUNK LWJ. JUST. THRUST SOME CHICKENS TO SHOW UR RESSURECTED BAE THAT U LOVE THEM.
i have absolutely no idea WHY they gave lwj the same punishment for fighting his own sect/allies to protect the burial mounds as when they got drunk on cloud recess class days.... like? its such a ... emotional continuity error again
also is lwj gonna get an actual friend besides wwx , ever
mianmian marrying and having a family and a cute life after saying FUCK U AND UR SYSTEM TOO in a much less unhinged and dramatic way than wwx......... fills me w joy
also lol the idea that like. her husband not knowing that shes friends w satan/the boogey man/the village witch is hilarious
i love nie mingjue bc hes the resident Though Guy but also the most dramatic bitch in this show and thats Saying Something
jin ling cant have one uneventful relative can he
the fact that everyone present already knew “mo xuanyu” was wwx at the stairs is so funny, their faces are like ‘oh............ wow. that. sure is a development. shock” 
in the tradition of extremely loud whispers wwx tells lwj with twelve guards standing like one meter away from them: HEY PSH LAN ZHAN PRETEND IM FORCING YOU TO STAY W ME DO IT
oh my god oh my god
the absolute Yearning on his face when he leaves wwx and a-yuan at the burial mounds and refuses to stay for dinner was already Enough but the fact?? they brought it back?? to this declaration of love?? their expressions??????? strike me dead right now just go ahead
lFor Legal Reasons We Cant Kiss but we will have a very sappy declaration of love and trust and look at each other in way that is the actualization of 💞💘💗💖💓💘💞💗💖💘💗💖💕💞
also icb all the sect leaders and guards are standing there watching them say they like like each other with a dozen swords pointing at their neck
i enjoyed the depiction of the fickle public perception and how easily it can be used to scapegoat people. when the sect leaders turn on jgy and wwx knows thats its more for convenience than anything else...
poor lxc is literally like 'oh so when YOUR problematic boyfriend gets called evil its a misunderstanding but when its MY problematic bf-'
ok like i cant get over nmj let jgy play a song that messed with his temperament at all, like maN u KNEW he might be shady wth
wwx: “hey dont say anything bad abt lan zhan hes not an arrogant dick, thats just his face. 
ME ON THE OTHER HAND"
the cultivators as wwx is poking holes in their narrative is literally *nazaré meme*
"wei wuxian-!" "what did i break your leg, too?" not to be problematic but i laughed so hard
not as hard as "you dont have the rank to talk to me " tho
i Enjoy that, over the course of story, wwx sees that... theres nothing truly to Do, but move on. he saw how his arrogance and his mistakes hurt others, and hes trying to fix what he can, but he already did die for his mistakes and there are things he cant fix and that's. just how it is. even towards jgy, the narrative doesn't go gleefully and completely with "lets make THEM pay bc theyre the big bad" bc its not that simple, and it wouldn't lead anywhere but more pain...
re him and jiang cheng and the wens and kinda. isnt that what nhs did? scheming to displace jgy out of revenge more than any justice and doing so in the most painful way?
idk if that actually makes sense im truly just babbling
i thought the scene at the lotus pond would be CUTE but the context was PAIN again
jiang cheng finding out about his golden core and his conflict with wwx at the guanyin temple .... destroyed me but in a nice way kinda.... same way it destroys him look at his face oh god
and. the fact??? he sacrificed himself for wwx?? first?? and he'll probably never tell anyone much less wwx???? keeps me up at night
i havent decided if the neckbreak transition between jgy does sth super Evil or does he he does OR Does He yes he does O R does heeeee is sth i dislike or not
jin guangyao and wei wuxians most interesting parallel is that... theyve both seen 'hmm hey this system is fucked up' and wwx went 'so fuck it all i will renounce it and challenge it' and jgy went 'so fuck it i will use all of it to my advantage and manipulate it to my goals and whims'
the fact jgys mom was actually great and he loved her and his whole issue w it was more than simply being ashamed of being a bastard kinda got me ngl
never trust a dude with a fan.
nhs and jgy: the first rule to a convoluted and decades spanning violent revenge plot is to have fun and be yourself! 
when a-yuan finally FINALLY remembers ;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;-;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;;; wen ning has someone in his family back and a-yuan has someone to talk abt his wen family and wwx has him back bc he survived and lwj raised him anD HES THEIR SON. THEYRE MARRIED AND HAVE A SON. UGH.
and theyre allowed to heal. everyone is allowed to try and recover and be happy
netflix put all of the 3 endings on top of each other and it looks kinda weird actually BUT I DONT EVEN MIND :’’’’’’’’’)
the gasp that left me when lwj says ‘wei ying’ and wwx turns.........
there was also a screen with ‘thank you mxtx for creating these characters, we hope their wishes come true’ and i might. have cried then too. maybe. 
that was . a ride. as is proven by this behemot of a ramble clearly i just really needed and Outlet. i am currently trying to convince dumb monkey brain to not consume the other medias of mdzs immediately bc i REALLY need to like. live. a life. and take care of real responsibilities.  *longest oh boi ever*
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annetteblog · 3 years
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Intro & My take on KM
Hi!
I’m new around here so it’s supposed to be (not so short) introduction, since I don’t know how to start a blog heh. I hope to sprinkle my 0.5 cents into the KM conversation and maybe to bring a new perspective from someone, who is not a part of the typical English-speaking West.
Who /the hell/ Am I?  
(please, consider it to be said with NJ’s voice from Intro: Persona :D)
I was born in Siberia (it’s in the Asian part of Russia), currently live in the European part of the country while studying at a Uni (European in terms of geography, not in terms of everything else i’m definitely not shading rn lolllll). English is not my first language, I’ve just kind of learnt it to some extent. Due to this it takes me more time to write a post; and I may (and will) make some grammatical & other mistakes. Plus I’m lazy AND busy with Uni, so I won’t even promise to be consistent in posting smth lol. But I thought I need more practice in terms of writing in English, so here I am, actually scribbling something. This feels weird, because I’ve been around stan Tumblr since 2015, but never ever interacted, just read.
How I ended up around Jikook/Kookmin (and BTS) & My (long&messy) take on this matter
Although I had heard of BTS before, I became an Army only in October 2018. I had kinda avoided them, because you know... boybands.... sing songs about romantic love and how they love girls.......... (+I had been around Twitter when 1D been at their peak and I remember a quite toxic community of fans, whom always had scared me). Shortly, hello stereotypes. Obviously, after I got engaged I felt terribly sorry that I had been sleeping on them, but what is done cannot be undone. 
Someone I knew back then reposted one of their MVs and I, during my sad hours of procrastination, decided to watch it. Then I saw their live performance with the same song. And I thought “wow these guys can sing and dance and the music is kinda cool, i need to check this out maybe??” 
Then a funny thing happened. One of the next videos I watched (the same person had it added to their page) was a 2016 BangtanBomb where JM and JK practiced their Coming of Age dance. 
Do you know this moment with Gina from the 1st episode of Brooklyn 9-9:
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Well, that was precisely me after I watched it. I don’t even know how to explain this, it was kind of a gut feeling? Whatever you call it, I started to get suspicious and couldn’t even explain to myself why. /actually now a do have questions to this vid and the main one - why does everyone cringe that much? if it’s a girly choreo than they had done some “girly” moves before. why is there such strong reaction??/
I started to get deeper and went to some ru-shipper communities. Shipping culture among Russian speaking fans is... well, weird to some extent, but I maybe address this topic some time later. You need to consider that (as far as you probably know) Russia is quite homophonic country and sadly is not the greatest place for LGBTQ+ community at the moment. The non-frienly influential attitudes hanging in the society + the general shippers’ weirdness = the result is not that nice honestly. 
I struggled for some time in order to find more mature people (not just in terms of age but in general sanity), failed, ended up with some EXTREMELY toxic ru-fans of TK, which was/is the most popular pairing here, spent among them like 15 minutes and ran away horrified. After that I didn’t even try to engage with shippers or believers or whatever of any pair and just decided to enjoy the music and the content (which is a great idea, highly recommend!)
After a couple of days I discovered that JK makes videos. I love video, films and visual art so I immediately found them on YT, saw the titles with names of different cities from all over the world and was like “Oh that must be so cool, he’s visited so many outstanding places I’ve never been to, so I really need to watch it! I shall enjoy some beautyyy”. Then I clicked on GCFt.
Well, what can I say. I did enjoy some beauty, but not the type I had initially anticipated. The biggest clickbait in my entire life. JK should be proud of himself.
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                                       /as I said - the beauty/
I had already known Troy back then and I known the song’s lyrics so it would not be an underestimation to say - the video just blew my mind. I was like - hold on is this real? seriously?? no really really????? he manage to get away with something THAT obvious?????? dude how
As a person who edited videos AND is not a native English speaker, I don’t buy the explanation “oh he mustve didnt get the lyrics lmao”. You just don’t do that. You don’t. DON’T. You google and translate every shit you don’t understand, every word and idiom you’ve never encountered, because otherwise the possibility of an epic failure is very likely. You wouldn’t want to give your mum a video as a birthday present and then discover that you used a song with WAP-ish lyrics, right? (well maybe that would be okay in your family, I don’t judge, but that’s not the case for people I know). So don’t you dare to degrade JK’s intellectual capacities; such assumption is really offensive. He is a smart boii, he knows exactly what he’s doing in terms of his art.
So I was shocked, but decided to look for the context - maybe I missed some previous events regarding this Tokyo thing (another great idea - always check the context). Well, apparently I didn’t, because the whole narrative with the trip for two, lovely selfies etc. made my poor brain lowkey explode. (I still don’t buy the rings theory thing though)
But I didn’t give up lol! I’m a bit stubborn and it’s very hard to convince me in anything, so I decided to search for more context, more of their interactions, moreeee. Remember, the late October 2018, there were no swan lakes, RB, and even MMA18 hadn’t happened yet. 
This time I ended up watching content in more or less consistent way, and when I saw all of these scenes with affectionate JM and a cool badass i-don’t-care-about-anyone-i’m-a-manly-man-with-no-feelings-whatsoever JK, I just hysterically laughed. 
Homophobic Russia, remember? I recognized this. Growing up here being LGBT myself, taught me the same type behaviour during my high school days. When a girl I kinda liked but didn’t what to admit it to myself was nice to me or (oh god) flirted with me, I did something similar. It’s like a huge panic mode. Being an introvert doesn’t help either. The funniest thing is that you may not entirely realise what exactly is going on in terms of your own feelings, especially at that age (16-18ish). In my personal case, I thought I liked her but as a friend, only later to realise that well not as a friend oops :DDD The second thing (already not so funny) is that you actually consciously or unconsciously try to avoid the subject as much as possible, as long as possible and pretend that nothing is going on. We’re just bros. Stop doing this stupid gayish thing and don’t look at me like that, you’re annoying. If you ever do this again I (gently) kick you. I’m straighter than a straight line in my math textbook. IDK, but probably that’s your brain is somehow trying to protect you. Again, in my case&position I knew that the consequences for any non-straight person being outed would be bad (TW not to the point of being killed bad, but to the point of being excluded from a big part of society). So for me it was a mixture of the internalized homophobia + lack of self reflection + just being a bit emotionally slow + very! straight community around. Shit happens, I was a teenager and made my share of mistakes, but that experience helps me to recognize the same pattern of behaviour up to this day.   
So coming back to KM, because the post is already waaay too long and I just ramble. It’s been 2+ years for me being a part of this fandom, and what can I say... Things become more intense and eventful with every year passing by ;) Funny how I felt that vibe from the 2016 dance practice video. Seeing the Black Swan performance a week ago almost had me choked, no joking. They are amazing.
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                                                    Pure Art
However, and I would like to emphasize that, I do not incline that KM are 100% romantically involved and/or gay or whatever. I tend to treat people with respect and not to make too much assumptions about their private life. That’s not my business. However, I’m also not a fan of heteronormativity, so I’m just sitting here and observe everything that’s going on putting some distance and not forgetting being generally polite and critical thinking. But if they are just straightest besties please give them an Oscar before Grammy
Anyways, I hope this blog won’t kick the bucket from the very start and I will post something every now and then. You can always ask me questions about some BTS/Jikook related stuff or something about Russia and a Russian view on mass culture topics, since I’m pretty sure some of you have very stereotypical view of what is going on here :) However, do note that I’ve never been to America or Europe, therefore I may not be aware of something verrrry obvious to you or just have a completely different experience. 
P.S.  And yeah, I’m used to say Jikook, since it’s the name which is used much more frequently in Russian.  i like it better and what will u do haha
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