#UGH WHY MUST I HURT MYSELF

[zuiz41]

Secret Glances, and Inches Apart.

It'd be easy to just close the gap between us,

It'd be easy to just kiss you right here.

maybe the longing that had grown in my heart will fade.

for the weight will ease,

and replace with joy,

to get to hold you and love you without fear, finally.

but it's easier said than done.

for dreams to come true, it is impossible.

because having you in my arms is like stars in the sea.

though it looks as if I could touch it easily,

It's just a reflection of what I cannot reach.

So, I'll just settle for what I am used to right now.

To glance at you in secret,

and to imagine what it'll feel if I'm not only inches apart from you.

[thebitchbehindtheslaughter]

Day 2,569,364 of being called evil for liking Dottore, and having my favourite character be slandered because some are too big of pussies to just say “I don’t like the character” like normal people

[autisticlee]

it always pisses me off when people start ghosting me and completely cut me off and think i'm annoying because I didn't ~get the hint~ all because they're too much of a coward to be straightforward and honest with me!!!!

i'll keep asking about a thing or when we are hanging out or try to converse with them, because their response is always excuses and not straight up "no" so how am I supposed to know?! either short responses of 1-5 words that I can't really respond to or things like "I'm busy this weekend/I'm too tired today/I forgot about it/we can try next time/I'll get back to you and le you know" are apparently all hints and lies to hide the truth. what they really mean when they tell me this is "no, stop asking. stop talking to me. I do not want to hang out with you or talk to you anymore"

why can't you just say that?! it will save you the annoyance of me asking you 20 times because i took your words at face value. your excuses sound temporary and you didn't get back to me so maybe you forgot. there are rare times people say these things and it's the truth or they really did forget!!!! when I say it, it's the truth. I also have a bad memory. you can't just suddenly ghost me for that! it's on you if you aren't being honest with me. it's up to you to be straightforward and tell the truth so you don't waste both our time. (what's worse is this is usually one of the first things I tell people when we meet. that I need then to be straightforward and honest. they promise they will but that's also a lie)

ghosting is so cruel (when the other person has no bad intentions/isnt causing harm). more cruel than telling me to my face you hate me and never want to speak again! i actually prefer that, so i at least know and can give up on your useless ass and stop wasting my time. don't give me false hope when i'm really excited to be friends and hang out, don't waste my time and energy and efforts, and don't lead me on with lies only to crush my entire soul when I find the truth much later. just say it and get it over with!!!! it's your fault if I annoy you by "not taking the hint" because there was no hint, lying isn't a hint. spill the truth and don't blame me for it!!!!!!

this is why i've given up with people and now only give attention to the ones who contact me first every time continuously, and I put little effort into anything anymore. I know that will end up making some people give up on me by thinking i dont care. but I'm tired of wasting my time and energy on the people who put no effort into me. you must prove yourself and keep doing it or I won't try at all. the people who ghost me and hurt me are to blame. yes, I live a very lonely existence with maybe one friend I talk to once every week or two for a total of 5 minutes at most. yes I wish I had more connections or closer ones. but i'm SO FUCKING TIRED. i'm tired of trying so much and so hard just for people to shit on my efforts and disrespect my needs and boundaries!!!!!!

why should I keep trying when it always ends bad and adds yet another layer to my trauma.

[toastsnaffler]

well I didn't talk abt what I specifically wanted to talk abt bc I could tell I was starting to get upset just being very vague and general and I mentally started doubting myself n defending against it n chickened out. but I'm grateful she listened to me vent a little anyway I do appreciate it ik she has plenty of better things to do w her time 🥹

[sensitivegoblin]

Not safe vent

[nachotrash]

Jesus Christ man

[rafesslxt]

neglected | mattheo riddle

summary: Theodore completly ignores you and doesnt take it serious that you miss him while he flirts with another girl at a party.. so his best friend has to help you filling up that hole inside your … chest.

warning: cheating? but is it if he does it first?, mattheo eating out the reader, fingering, nipple play, teasing, dirty talk, getting caught, he‘s a munch don‘t fight with me over this -

note: i do not support cheating, this is just for the story

— monday —

I don‘t know how many times I already begged but from time to time.. i felt more and more neglected.

"Theo, please just this one weekend! You had been busy with your friends and studying the last 3 weeks!" Yeah, 3 weeks since my boyfriend went on a date with me, had some quality time or touched me.

"Y/n I told you I don‘t have time. I already promised the boys I‘d come to the party. We‘ll see us there, I have to go study now, with Lydia." Before I could even say a word he left his dorm. I hear a chuckle coming from the other side of the room, making me turn my head in it’s direction.

"Told you you deserve better baby." Mattheo, Theodore‘s best friend said, sitting on his bed. They share a dorm and every now and then he would see Theo and me arguing.

I huff and leave the room, a aching feeling in my body.

— the next day —

"Theo please, I need you. You didn‘t touch me once the last few weeks." I whine into his ear, sitting next to him. He just groans, but not the way I want him to and gets up with his book in his hands. "Don‘t you see that you‘re distracting me?" Irritated he leaves the room, probably walking off to the library again.

Ugh.. i let myself fall back down onto the mattress and cross my arms over my face. Is it my fault? Did my body change somehow? Why the hell won‘t he touch me? But before I could continue my thoughts, I hear the door again, my head shooting up, hoping it is Theo who changed his mind but no, it‘s Mattheo. I groan frustrated and let my head fall back.

"Wow nice to see you too baby, but I think you‘re laying on the wrong bed." he says, teasing me.

"Sometimes I think like that too." I mumble into my arms and more to myself.

"What was that?" he asks. "Nothing."

— two days later —

Patiently I wait on Theo‘s bed, dressed all up.. or down, in his favorite lingerie set and a pair of black knee socks. When we got together half a year ago he told me he loved them on me, made my legs look even longer.

As the door opens my heart starts beating faster and I look up, shrieking and pulling the blanket over my body as I see who it is. "Damn mami is that for me?" Mattheo asks as he stand in front of Theo‘s bed with a smirk on his face, his mouth wide open.

"What the fuck are you doing here?" I asked furious, not wanting him to see me like that. What If Theo comes in and would see us, what would he think?

"Last time I checked this is my room, sweetcheeks." "But you‘re supposed to have quidditch practice!" I whine and look for my clothes.

He chuckles and steps a bit closer as I stand up from the bed. "Could you turn around? I wanna get dressed." "No." "You are such a pain in the ass!" I roll my eyes at him and take my wand, mumbling "Colloportus“. and holding it towards the door so no one can come inside.

I let go of the blanket, thinking fuck it, and grab my skirt, pulling it over my legs and then my hips. "Did your cute little boyfriend leave you unsatisfied again?" he grins and takes a step closer. "You know.. I could help you with that." he says in a suggestive tone. "He’s your best friend Mattheo, stop this shit." "I can’t princess. Hurts me to see that pretty little body of yours, knowing how desperate it must be after all these weeks." he whispers the last part as he lets his fingers slowly brush over my arm, sending shivers down my spine. "See? It’s so hot for just a little attention." "No, it is cold, thats why." I say, swallowing down the clump in my throat as i nod towards the opened window.

Just as I wanted to reach down for my top, I see Mattheo getting down on his knees in front of me. He looks up and licks his lips. Damn.. something about a men on his knees for me made me feel slme type of way.

"Please let me touch your legs, please. Need to know how soft these pretty thighs feel." I could feel his warm breath against my skin, again, sending shivers down my… spine. wet pussy

"Mattheo get the fuck up I swear to god!" i hiss at him. Yes I closed the door with a spell but it wasn‘t really hard for everyone above first years to open it with a spell.

"Please, I swear If you let me just touch it I‘m gonna leave you alone for the rest of the week!" he pleads, looking at my face and then my legs. I sigh as I think about letting him. Damn was I really thinking about it? Am I really going to let my boyfriends best friend touch my thighs?

But I mean.. nothing’s wrong If I don‘t feel anything for it, right? Plus he would just leave me alone for a bit. "Fine." I press out.

As soon as the words leave my mouth, I feel his big warm hands on my thighs. "Shit.." he mumbles as he lets them wander up and down my legs. He slighty squeezes them, making me sigh in relief.

I feel his curls against my skin before I can look down and see him kissing my flesh, grabbing it with a bit more strengh now. I had to bite my bottom lip as he starts massaging them. Completly lost in thoughts, I realize too late what he was doing.

Suddenly he stands up and kisses my cheek "Thank you, doll.", before leaving the dorm and leaving me breathless in the middle of the room. As I slowly come back from the dizzy feeling inside my head I again, stretch over to get my top but gasp with shaky breathing as I see what Mattheo left on my skin.

A hickey. And a bite mark. I didn‘t even notice him biting my leg. Shit.

— Saturday —

To say i was pissed, while sitting on a chair in some corner of the common room, was a big understatement. Theodore and I arrived at the party he talked about a few days ago.. 2hours ago. I saw him drinking with his friends and playing truth or dare in a little group, always walking away from me as soon as I approached him. So I decided to stop chasing him.

"What are you doing here all alone sweetcheeks?" I look to my right and see Mattheo. Of course it was him. "Leave me alone." I say, rolling my eyes and looking back to my boyfriend, sitting beside this girl named Lydia. She was a year under us I think.

Mattheo followed my gaze and shakes his head. "Well , the deal was I would leave you alone till end of the week. The week is over." I don‘t even answer him, not in the mood to argue.

"Yeah thanks for the hickey and the mark between." i say sarcastically. "Yeah it‘s not like your boyfriend would see, right?"

I roll my eyes again and look back at Theodore, to see him standing up. What was he going to do? Suddenly I see him taking Lydia‘s hand, pulling her up with him and kissing her. In shock I opened my mouth, but instead of crying like i normally would, my face got red in anger.

I tried everything and here he stands sucking of the face of that stupid thot. In the middle of the common room? With the girl he "studys" all the time? I bet that’s not the first time they kiss. Mattheo seems to see it too and looks at me more serious now. "Hey.. are you okay? I mean he‘s not worth it If you - " but before he can continue I grab him at the collor of his shirt and drag him with me to his dorm.

— 30 minutes later —

"Oh fuck yes, Mattheo!" I moan into the air, pushing his head against me while his lips suck on my clit, his fingers pumping inside me. "Shit who would have known that you go this feral for my tounge huh?" he smiles and mumbles against my skin.

"Stop talking and continue!" I whine and push his head back. I hear him chuckle before he laps at my throbbing clit again. God If I would have known how good this feels I would have had ended things with Theo way sooner.

His free hand slides across my body up to my left boob where he started to tease my nipple. I gasp and push my hips up, arching my back. My body was so sensitive I wanted to cry out of pleasure everytime he touched me somewhere.

It didn‘t took me long before my body starts trembling and shaking, Mattheo licking everything up as I come on his tounge.

"I could get drunk on your pussy." he groans before kissing me, making me taste myself on his lips.

"I hope you‘re ready cause that pussy screams for me." he whispers against my lips before going down on me again.

A few minutes in I hear someone yell. "WHAT THE FUCK?"

My head shot up and I looked to the door where Theo stood, looking ag us with an angry face.

I saw Mattheo looking at him over his shoulder, smiling at him with glistening lips. "Hey men, hope you don‘t mind? We got the impression you were busy.. never mind – bro how could you not eat that pussy like.. all day?"

"I‘m gonna kill you, Riddle!"

shorter than usual but I liked it 🌼

thanks for reading and supporting 🫶🏻

xoxo sarah <3

[aajjks]

Blow (m)

synopsis. suck the brat out of him on his birthday.

warnings: 18+ ëxplïcït thèmès. bràtty kóó, bïrthdày spècíàl, blôwjôb, orál sèx, (málè rècíèvíng), he móàns só múch!, prófàníty. súck hïs dïck súck hïs sôul, sóft yándèrè kóó.

note. happy birthday to you kook, every year I try to convince myself that I love you a normal amount but at the end of the day I am more in love w you each and every day, HAVE A GOOD DAY JK!!~ and come back soon. I can’t believe you’re 23 now 🥺🥺 time flies. ENJOY THIS FILTH GUYS! also…. my bday month started WOHOOOO!

Jungkook loves you.

Today is a special day for him, his birthday and you know it. But it’s 1 am right now yet he’s received no birthday wish from you.

He doesn’t know what you’re busy doing, but it hurts so bad that you didn’t even bother to wish him a happy birthday birthday. You’ve been dating for two years and this is the first time you have forgotten to wish him a happy birthday.

He doesn’t know what to think because he’s so sensitive when it comes to you. He’s sulking in his bed right now.

He doesn’t know what you’re doing in the kitchen, but maybe he should just go to sleep because you don’t even remember his birthday and even if you do, you didn’t even bother to wish him a happy birthday

Jungkook feels so abandoned right now

He shouldn’t feel this way because it’s not really a big deal but at the same time it is to him because your attention means everything to him and he’s so used to being the center of your attention

And he wants your attention on him, especially on his birthday

“Ughhh yn!!!” He groans before sulking down on the bed and he covers his body with the blanket so you don’t see him crying when you come back into the bed

Not even a happy birthday from you.. it’s 1 AM how is he supposed to get over this?

“You’re sleeping?” There comes your voice, and he is a startled, but only for a moment before he groans in response.

Why do you care?

“obviously I’m sleeping because you don’t even care about what date it is now.”

 Your boyfriend can be really petty. And he doesn’t care.

It’s September 1st this day should be the most important to you.

He hears your laugh, “woah! YOU’RE LAUGHING, HUH?” He exclaims, immediately peeking his head from the blanket and he’s glaring at you

“I never forget your birthday. I do so much for your birthday, but you don’t even care!” Hey sees you approach him on the bed, but he’s just so busy ranting

He doesn’t care when you sit right in front of him on the bed. “Ouch! You’re sitting on my legs.” He rolls his eyes, huffing.

He may be a diva.. but it’s all because of you

why aren’t you acknowledging the birthday boy?

“Ugh yn you frustrate me to no end oh my God—;” he is suddenly cut off when you press your lips against his.

Jungkooks eyes widen in surprise for a moment but then he feels himself melt into the kiss, your lips feel so soft against his, his anger is melting away just like him.

Jungkook enjoys kissing you very much, it’s so intimate, so sweet, so important for him, your lips move in a swift passionate manner against his and he loves the way your hands are cradling his face right now.

“mhm..” he cannot help but moan into your mouth as you tease his lower lip with your tongue. “Happy birthday baby.” You break the kiss, leaving him all breathless and dazed as you whisper so softly.

Jungkook feels his heart rate quicken. You wished him happy birthday finally and there’s a predatory look in your eye that he recognizes quite too well.

“Now… if you must know.. I was busy because I was baking your cake.” You inform him and he’s surprised. Jungkooks eyes go round, and the realization dawns on him.

That is so sweet.

“B-Baby? Really so you remembered?!!”

“Yes! How could I ever forget your birthday and the second thing is I couldn’t really leave the kitchen that’s why I got a little late with wishing you a happy birthday baby. I am so sorry…” you look down in guilt.

But jungkooks heart softens up.

“‘S okay yn.. you gave me such a good kiss and told me the reason behind your delay, which is so cute by the way, so consider yourself forgiven.”

But you shake your head and before he knows it you’re pushing him against the bed. “W-Woah—;”

“Baby I have to make it up to you and that’s what I’m doing so shut your mouth.” You shut him up.

His eyes are even wider now, his heartbeat more quicker.

He doesn’t know what to do because he doesn’t know what you’re up to.

Jungkook exclaims as he watches you take his pyjama off, “woah yn…” but you just don’t respond, he feels your hand on the hem of his underwear and he doesn’t stop you as you push it down to his knees.

His hard length is now right now infront of your eyes, your hungry eyes, he’s so hard right now.

You don’t waste any time to take him into your hand as you begin to stroke him, he groans, Finally understanding what you’re trying to do

And it is getting him excited

“O-Oh ynnnn.” He moans out your name as you work your magic before you lean downwards and suddenly spit on it, before taking him straight into your pretty mouth.

Your wet, tight eager mouth.

The sensation is too much, his back arches on the bed, as you take him in deeper, you’re sitting right between his legs now.

This is so fucking hot.

And your eyes? They’ll make him cum right now. Your eyes are wild and animalistic.

He loves the lust that is dripping from them.

You hollow your cheeks and lick his sensitive dick, any part you can, he mewls, his eyebrows furrowing.

“nghh ahh mhm.”

Your boyfriend’s moans are always so pretty, just like him. Your panties are so soaked, you cannot help but rub your legs together to get some kind of friction.

It’s his day, you’ll focus on his pleasure all night and day long.

“C-Cum for me koo..” you instruct, sucking him off. Your throat feels sore, but it’s so worth it.

The way he’s fucking it so desperately, sloppily has your pussy clenching. You need him so badly but, tonight.. you’re going to be selfless..

And give him everything that you can physically emotionally and mentally.

Because he’s the love of your life and today is the day that he was born and you were going to celebrate it with him, in more ways than one.

Jungkook loves the fact that you’re choking, gadding and crying. He fucking loves it. But yeah, you’re still being so gentle with him and so patient.

This is why he loves you so much.

You’ve made this night so special

he looks into your eyes once more and he’s cumming hard, a cry of pleasure leaves as he eagerly empties himself in your mouth.

His eyes are now closed, his lip almost bleeding from his hard he is biting it, drool on the corners of his mouth as he huffs.

You swallow, finally letting him go as you try your best to breathe at the same time. He’s fallen back on the bed, completely spent.

He’s actually high on pleasure right now.

“F-Fuck…” he curses, barely conscious

“Happy birthday koo, I love you so much, baby.. but don’t fall asleep I made cake, come.”

You wipe your mouth, swallowing his taste, you’re not really gonna have cake because you’re more than full right now

But you bet he’s hungry

And the truth is, he’s starving

But for something else entirely

[oohshinywhump]

Thinking about a first time Whumper x veteran Whumpee...

When they first meet:

"You don't seem nearly scared enough. This isn't your first time is it?" "You seem weirdly nervous. Is it yours?"

"Ugh! Out of everyone in the city I could kidnap I had to get stuck with someone else's leftovers!"

"You used to belong to so-and-so, didn't you? Ah! They're my idol! Oh! This is exciting. I get to study their masterpiece up close!"

"WHY AREN'T YOU SCARED OF ME?!!!"

"Oh. You've never done this before." "Stop judging me. I have a knife."

"How is it you know exactly what I like?" "You torturers are all the same." "You've done this before??"

"I won't kill you, but I need you to cooperate. I am new to this, just so you know." "Yup. I'm going to die."

"Mmmm, I love how you move when you're in pain." "Thanks! I've been practicing for years."

"Who taught you to scream like this?"

Whumpee helping Whumper figure out the basics:

"Why are you on your knees?" "Oh sorry. Do you not like that? The last guy liked me that way. I just assumed…" "No, no. It's a good idea. Keep doing that. I just… never thought of it."

"So, what are the rules?" "Rules?" "Yeah, dumbass. Your rules for me. Do you want me to call you sir? Master? Or can I keep calling you jackass?"

"Do you want me to put up a fight or should we skip straight to the submissive stage?" "Oh... uhhh... don't fight too much. I don't trust myself not to accidentally kill you." "Oh, yeah. Good point."

"What kind of scream do you like?" "There are kinds of screams?" "Yeah. The last guy liked it when I ugly-cried. But I'm pretty good a bloodcurdling and whimpering like a kicked puppy. I can try to stay quiet but I can't make promises there..." "Hmmm... try all of them. I'll tell you which I like best."

"You cleaned??" "Yeah? Was I not supposed to?" "I didn't know you could make captives do that?!" "For the record, I didn't do it because I'm scared of you - your arm gets tired after giving me like three lashes. I did it because I'm going to be spending a lot of time bleeding on this table and I doubt it occurred to you to disinfect it."

Whumpee teaching Whumper how to whump:

"Show me what they used to do to you."

Whumper studying the scars on Whumpees body to learn the best places to cut/stab.

"Oh no! A knife? How original!" /s

"If you stab me right there you'll kill me. You have to go one inch to the right. Yeah, right there-AHHHHHH! …yup. Right there."

"I'll make you a deal. Let me have a solid eight hours of sleep and I'll show you where to pinch the nerve that will paralyze my left arm."

"You can't leave me tied up like this!" "I can do what I want!" "Yes. Okay. True. But like, you've either got to tie my knees to my chest or let my feet touch the ground. Otherwise I'm going to asphyxiate."

Whumper having an inferiority complex:

"I CAN DO ANYTHING THEY COULD DAMMIT!" (They = Whumpee's former Whumper)

"WHUMPEE! YOU'RE NOT BETTER THAN ME!" *Whumpee trying not to laugh when Whumper fucks up something really basic.*

"You must think I'm so pathetic." "NOo! Of course not! You're doing amazing! Really you are! I'm so fucking scared of you right now. I promise."

"I'll never be as good as the person who hurt you before." "You'll get there! I promise. I was like his fifth victim - I'm your first. Be kind to yourself!"

"How the fuck did your former Whumper do it?" "Yeah... you're not getting that out of me..."

Whumper being paranoid that Whumpee is manipulating them. Even though they hold the power they feel like Whumpee has more control over the situation because they know more.

Also...

Whumpee knowing just how to manage Whumper. They instinctively know when to be a little defiant and when to do exactly as they are told. They know just the right tone of voice to speak in, and just how to move, scream, to keep Whumper as pleased as possible. The sooner Whumper is satisfied the sooner it will stop.

Whumpee pretending it hurts worse than it does, lying about which places/tortures hurt most, acting more sick or tired than they really are to get rest/food, acting more scared than they really are… It's not like Whumper could know better.

[occamstfs]

To The Ground Floor

Heyo- Saw this next picture and just had to use it so here’s a businessman to dumb sub twunk TF! 

If anyone wants to suggest a prompt for my 1K follower post here’s the link- https://forms.gle/NE66kaH4KJxkhgPk9

Probably be wrapping it up/posting a poll soon! -Occam

I don’t know what my company was thinking when they scheduled our conference in Tenerife. It would be one thing if it was a retreat or team vacation, but it is nearly impossible to get any real work done with all these tourists stomping around and getting in my way. I was set to make it early to our morning meeting, as I always do, before this twat forced his way in before I could get to the close door button. He surely noticed since he glared at me before returning to focus on the only thing that seems to matter to him, his vanity.

In retrospect I should have kept my mouth shut, but I couldn’t help but scoff as he started to take a picture of his reflection in the door. It was immature, but when dealing with this crowd of influencers or whatever these childish twits has put me off my usually stoic demeanor. He immediately responded with aggression, “You laughin’ mate? You lot all think you’re so much better than us eh?” He scowls once more at me and to his credit, I do think myself superior to him. Not afraid to say it either.

I open my mouth to shoot some clever insult at him but before I can the delinquent fully spits at me! Where does he get off! The elevator chimes as it stops at the sixth floor. I grab my handkerchief to wipe the spit off my dress shoes as I hear him run off, shouting “you’ll get yours ya git!” I look up to see the small of his back showing beneath his trailing coat and mesh top. I can’t help but stare as he runs, asshole he may be but, god, he is hot isn’t he?

I cough as I can’t believe I thought that! He’s absolute filth! Parading himself around dressed like that on a work day, my word! I don’t notice that there is no longer a handkerchief in my hand as I reach to wipe the spit off my shoes with my now empty hand. As I finally wrest my eyes from his pert body I notice that the villain pushed every button in the elevator. So help me god if I’m late to my meeting I will find him and- well, there’s not much I can do. I’m not exactly the peak specimen, unlike, uh him I suppose.

The doors click closed and begin to take me to the fifth floor. I consider hopping off to take the stairs but I’m sure he’ll be there waiting for me. I go to check my rolex when I notice I’m not wearing it? I would never go to a meeting without it though? My mind grows foggy as I thoughtlessly wipe the spit still on my hand on my suit. God it’s a little warm in this elevator isn’t it. I sniff the air and find that it still smells of that jerk. His cologne must’ve been something intense.

I continue to whiff the air before realizing that it is clearly not perfume but his natural body odor, blushing as I grow slightly jealous at his scent. I find my mind drifting as I think what a man he must be to smell so, mm. The only word I can think is, virile? Ugh, I need to get to work, this is going to set me back. The doors clink open to the fifth floor as the heat only continues to grow. Why am I wearing such a thick suit jacket anyway? It is so fucking hot on this island. I absolutely hate it here. I’ll just take it off for the rest of the elevator ride. Yeah, that couldn’t hurt right? My eyes glaze over as I think of his coat trailing off his head as he ran down the hallway and I bite my lip.

God that hot fucker. My jacket falls to the floor and before I can catch it it’s as if it was never there. I grunt as I think once more of my upcoming meeting. Surely they won’t judge right? My mind shuffles as I don’t even try to understand what has happened to my jacket. The fogginess in my head swiftly finds a form though as I see his smug smirk in my mind. Fuck I- I need to fuck him, or be fucked or? I grunt once more, my voice noticeably more dull. I try to fan my shirt open as the heat grows worse and I find myself growing hornier by the second. The elevator is already on the way to the fourth floor without my notice. I give up fanning my shirt and instead just open the buttons when I am suddenly met with something I cannot reconcile. When the fuck did I get, such, fuckable pecs? I press a finger into my own chest and start to drool as I see the depth of my muscle. I see my brown nipples grow and try to wipe the pooling drool from my mouth as I think how much my body looks like that uh, that twit? No that uh, that hot fucker?  I feel like I’m losing my mind. Or, losing myself? Uh..

The doors open and close on floor four as I struggle to think of absolutely anything but that, uh, stud. My own chest jutting out forces me to think of his own hearty pecs. The powerful curves of his body stretching his fishnet top, ugh. I see the biceps now on my own arms and struggle to not flex them thinking of that staring at himself in the elevator’s reflective wall and posing. I stare at the abs pushing out of my torso and think of his cinched waist peeking out from those sagging pants. God why didn’t I just try to fuck him then oohh.. Or no, Why didn’t I give myself to him..I moan as I loosen my belt, trying to allow my growing erection some air, instead giving my cock and ass more space to expand.

God his fuckable ass was impossible to miss even through those jeans. I bite my lip once more trying to stop myself from moaning as the doors open to the third floor. No one is there to see or hear me as my pants drop to the floor and disappear as if they were never there. As if I would wear pleated pants ever I think blushing. My cock begins to grow to fill my boxers. Or no hee hee- Surely I’m not wearing boxers right haha, giggling as I look down and see the clear imprint of my erection in my tight spandex. Mikey would never let me wear something so unattractive as boxers~

I feel an itch in my crotch as I think of Mikey once more, not hesitating to wonder how I could possibly know his name. Nor why he brings me such intense, feelings. It’s just, I’m so lucky to have him! Ah- I might lose control if I keep thinking about him, I need to keep it together for my uh, meeting? I shove my hand into my crotch to deal with whatever that itch is when I find it’s not my still growing cock, but a jungle of pubes that have begun to grow down there. I feel my fingers drag through them, now covered in sweat as the pubes begin to push themselves above my waistline. 

I giggle to myself as I see the thick black hair inch its way to create a perfect treasure trail up my stomach. I’ve gotta keep it looking good for Mikey after all! I play with the lengthening hair in my crotch, giggling to myself, as the elevator makes its landing on the second floor. I raise my sweaty hand to smell it as some prude stares in disbelief in the elevator lobby. I smile coily at him as he narrows his eyes in shock. He almost looks a little familiar but I’d certainly not waste any of my time on him haha!

He decides not to get on for some reason, not that I care as I look at my sharpening reflection. I play with my chest feeling the ebb and flow of my strength as I start to smell my own scent fill the elevator. I notice my feet are now bare on the dirty elevator’s floor. Ah, I hope Mikey won’t be upset if my feet are gross, smiling to myself as I think of him chewing me out. I feel a similar forest begin to grow in my pits as the elevator stops unceremoniously on the first floor before making its way to the ground floor.

I rub my hands all over on my now almost completely unclothed body as I feel my spandex shrink and tighten into a yellow speedo. My hands glide smoothly around the muscular curves, only ever getting caught on my tangled pubes as I giggle to myself. Wasn’t there something I had to do when I got to the ground floor? I raise my arm to bask in my scent as the elevator finally delivers me to my destination, and who could be standing there but Mikey!

“Mikey!” I shout at him! He looks so happy to see me, before responding, “well you’re looking great aren’t ya love.” He pushes and prods me as if he’s inspecting me as I proudly stand there giving him the doe eyes he demands. He smirks as he pulls me out of the elevator and plants his lips on mine. I can barely help but come right there as I feel my cock stretch at my speedo. I moan but keep it together, feeling his pursed lips grow into a smirk before he pulls away and laughs. 

I tilt my head at him before he speaks once more, “you remember what you’re supposed to be doing right now right, pet?” My face grows warm with blush, surely betraying my cluelessness as I struggle to remember. I had a meeting or? No, Haha As if! I, I could never work a stupid office job~ I try to look as coy as possible, inviting him to jog my memory. His eyes grow dark, not from aggression, but a hunger welling within him as he answers, “I need ya to get those posh wankers and bring them to me eh, doll? Need to them to submit yeh?”

My smile grows wide as my mind fills with excitement for this task. I’m gonna be so good and Mikey will be so proud of me! None of those boring businessmen will be able to resist me hehe! I begin to make my way out to the beach looking for any salarymen looking especially susceptible to my charms. I strut around, my body on display to everyone, monkeysuit suckers and other horny tourists alike. As if any of them have something more important going on hee hee! Soon they’ll all realize there is nothing more important than pleasuring Mikey!

[heartfullofleeches]

Dude I feel so bad for zombie Yan, I tend to be accidentally honest but would totally keep up their delusion. Like, their little half exposed brain can't process their (probably bad) death, how am I supposed to tell them?

Like, "yeah babe lots of humans have half of their brain out, don't worry pookie" "Yeah I know their arm fell off, would you stop being such a dick about it?" "They just drank too much water from the sink, that's why their skin is gray"

"Hey, babe.... Do you still think I'm cute?"

They feel like such a terrible partner - piling stupid questions on top of all the care and attention you've given them since they got sick. You must be so tired of them now, but they needed to hear it from you. The difference between them now and the person you fell in love with were like night and day. They'd lost so much weight in these past few months, their eyes are hollow and empty. Their skin remains the same blotchy gray color no matter how many hours they lay rotting in the sun.

"Of course I do. Why wouldn't I, silly?"

"I don't know.... I guesx I just haven't been feeling like myself lately....With that whole dog bite incident and everything that's happened since I feel like a burden to you...."

"Hey, don't think like that. You're just sick - that's all, remember?"

Sick... That's right. They said so themselves. Ugh, it's not fair. How come you still be that same wonderful you that they fell for all that time ago? So understanding and still so, so cute. You just get cuter by the day to them...It makes it so hard for them to control their temper when they see neighbors interacting with you outside. Don't they know you belong to them? Just because they get to be outside with you doesn't mean a damn thing. They hate how buddy buddy everyone gets when their symptoms flare up and they can't leave the house with you. Hate, hate, hate- They just want claw, and stomp, and bite all their dumb, smiling faces into a mangled heap no one would be able to tell apart. It's what they deserve for trying to steal you away.

But they'd never do anything like that - Hurting people would make you cry and if they did that what good were they to you?

"I think it's time for bed."

"Yay!"

Your partner crawls in bed, leaving their ankle hanging off the edge of the mattress for you to shackle to the frame. Once testing the strength of the chain, you climb in right alongside them - loosening the latches of their muzzle by a few notches as you both get comfortable. You kiss the cheek with the lesser amount of decay as they nuzzle up to you - breathing in your intoxicating scent. Deep down you both knew they'd never bite you. You satisfied a different craving and if they ever lost you their hunger for human flesh would swallow them whole.

"I'm sorry we have to do this, but we can't risk you running out while I'm asleep again."

"It's okay. I know you're just trying to help me get better. I actually really like the idea of being chained to you for the rest of my life. I love you so much, baby. Soon as I get better I promise I'll be the one taking care of you."

"Yea.... I'd like that."

[fanficsformyfaves]

I Don't Wanna Live Forever Pt.2

Rhea Ripley x Fem Prostitute!Reader (Pt.1)

WARNING: ANGST, Depressive Episode, Harassment, Bar Fight, Violence, Confrontation, Confessions, Hurt to Comfort

PREFACE: Reader was Rhea's favorite girl to call on a Saturday night, but little did she know that the wrestler was falling harder and harder with each visit

A/N: Special Appearance by The Judgment Day!

Shed a couple tears over this, but it's cool

The radio silence was unbearable. It had been weeks and with each day that passed, I began to regret what I did more and more. If I'd truly done the right thing, why didn't it feel like it? Why did it feel like I'd just lost a part of myself losing her? I had only myself to blame, so it was unfair of me to be angry at her, but I was.

I was angry at the longing stares and the gentle caresses against my bare skin. I was angry at the inside jokes and little secrets that were shared beneath her sheets. I was angry at all the nights we spent in each others arms. All the things that got me in this mess in the first place, but most of all...I was angry at myself.

Angry that I was too much of a coward to tell her that her feelings were in fact reciprocated.

With where my head was at and how devasting everything was, I decided to completely resign from the service that was using me. In no world could I imagine continuing to be in other peoples beds, when all I wanted was to be in hers. Out of every low point I'd hit before, this was by far the worst one.

I could barely get out of bed without tears immediately streaming down my face. Days felt empty and nights felt suffocating like my body knew something was missing. Even simple tasks like eating and breathing had now become burdensome.

I didn't know whether or not I'd make it out of this one, but by some miracle, I was met with a chance at starting over.

An old friend of mine that used to work with me in the same service recently reached out upon hearing about my departure from one of the other girls. I found out, shortly after leaving, that she got a job at a bar closer to the city and that they were hiring new drink-runners. The pay was decent and I needed something to keep me busy, so of course, I said yes to being interviewed.

I sent in my resume, went in on Monday and the next morning, I got a call saying I was hired, which brings us to right now.

The night started of fine with me just serving the drinks and food, when I heard the bell signaling someone came in. It was a group of obnoxiously loud men that immediately had me and my friend rolling our eyes. I picked up some menus and reluctantly headed over to the table they chose.

"Welcome, what can I get started for you guys?", I say,

Placing down the laminated papers.

"No fucking way!", I heard one of them exclaim,

And when I turn to see who it was, my heart dropped. It was a guy that I previously serviced.

"Yes?", I asked,

Playing clueless.

"Oh, come on, don't tell me you don't recognize me...or the fun little night we had"

I could tell by the way he slurred his words that he was incredibly drunk. His group immediately began snickering and raking their eyes up and down my body.

"I'm sorry, sir. You must be thinking of someone else"

"Nah, I'd recognize those tits anywhere", he declared,

Causing 'oohs' to echo from the table.

I held my composure and took a deep breath through my nose.

"Excuse me, gentlemen", I said,

Walking away and heading back to the bar.

"What's up?", my friend asked,

Seeing the irritated expression on my face.

"Old clients at table 6"

"Ugh, again? Do they not have jobs? They're here every night"

"Seriously?"

"Yeah, you haven't been scheduled past 8 yet, so you were lucky enough not to run into them", she explained,

"Well, I guess I'm shit outta luck now", I joked.

And as if the universe couldn't have had worse timing, another group walks in and the sinking feeling in my chest had now become a burning sting.

"Wait, isn't that-"

Before my friend could get her words out, I immediately hid in the kitchen. I hear her calling out to me as I left, but didn't bother turning back to look.

Out of any place on earth and out of any bar, she just had to show up at the one that I work at? This had to have been some sick joke. What was I meant to do now? It's not like I could just leave and risk getting in trouble on my second week.

I stayed still a few minutes to recollect myself and once I was successful, I take in one last deep breath, before heading back out.

"You've got this", my friend reassured,

Handing me four menus.

I made my way towards her table and the closer I got, the harder it became for the both of us to ignore the other's gaze.

"Welcome, what can I get started for you guys?", I say,

Putting on my best customer service voice.

"I'll take chicken tenders", the one with the mullet answered,

"We both want steaks, medium rare", the tallest added on,

As I jotted down their orders.

"Alright and...for you, miss?", I asked,

The hesitance in my voice giving my nerves away.

"Just some gin for now", she answered,

Avoiding eye contact.

As painful as it was, I decided against asking any further questions at the risk of making things any more uncomfortable.

"Those should be right out", I nod my head,

Walking off, but as I was headed towards the serving hatch to put the orders in, I felt a hand grab my wrist.

"What time do you get off?", the asshole from earlier questioned,

Causing me to rip my arm away.

"Excuse you", I scolded,

Going to turn away, when he grabbed me by the arm next. I could feel the panic start to set in and my eyes start to water.

"Get off, seriously", my words trembled,

"Oh, what? Does the slut think she's too good for m-", his sentence was cut short by a tissue holder hitting the back of his head,

Causing him to fall over.

"She said get off", Rhea warned through gritted teeth,

"Handle this, I'm taking her home", she ordered her friends,

They all turn to each other smirking, before sauntering over to the table full of the guy's friends. They all immediately took off, leaving him behind to fend for himself.

"Come on", she urged,

"My shift isn't over", I shakily muttered,

She sighed, taking out her wallet.

"Dom, make sure to let the manager knows what happened and that (Y/N) went home", she instructed,

Pulling out a couple hundreds, before dropping them on the table.

"You got it, mami", he said,

Picking up the guy and dragging him outside with the help of the other two men.

"Wait, what are they-"

"Doesn't matter. Come on", she throws an arm over my shoulder,

Leading me outside and helping me into her car. The last thing I saw before driving off was the three men completely pummeling the guy into a pulp. Not to say he didn't deserve it, but, I still couldn't help but feel uneasy.

The car ride wasn't much help either. Besides the quite hum that came from the engine and the passing cars, it was mostly silent. She must've noticed, as her hand gently gripped my knee in an attempt to calm me down.

"Are you hurt?", she finally spoke,

"My arm's sore", I answered hesitantly,

Causing her to let out a shaky exhale through her nose.

He did yank me pretty hard, so I wouldn't be surprised if I woke up to a handprint on me.

"We're almost at mine", she lets me know.

As if I didn't already recognize the street we were on. I mean I'd been down this road too many times not to.

"We're here"

She pulls into her driveway and gets out to open my door for me. She then leads me into the house, urging me to take a seat on the sofa.

"I'll get an icebag. Wait, here"

"It's fine-"

Before I could object, she had already left the living room.

The tension was so apparent, I felt it in my bones. She was cold and guarded, but I had no right to fault her for it. I was the one who ended things and now, I had to lay in the bed I made.

She returns with the ice and lifts my sleeve to press it against the bruise, causing me to wince at the ache.

"Who was that guy, anyways?", she questioned,

"An old client. I don't work there anymore though"

For the first time this whole evening, her eyes finally met mine.

"What?"

"I quit last month. I couldn't do it anymore", I admitted,

As her gaze softened.

"Why?"

"It's not important", I tried to brush off,

"(Y/N)"

"It doesn't matter-"

"(Y/N)", she called sternly,

Causing tears to prick at my eyes.

"Did someone hurt you?"

"No-"

"Then what?"

What was I meant to say? That I was the cause of my own hurting? That I left the only life I'd known because someone showed me that I deserved better than that? That that person was her?

"Then...what?", she pressed further.

With a single tear rolling down my cheek, I finally confessed.

"Because of you", my voice waivered.

Her eyes widened, as she slowly put the icepack down.

"Since the last time we spoke, I've been going through the worst time"

A tear rolled down my cheek and my entire body began to chill. Her brows met in a sadness that was too deep to describe.

“I thought I could get over it, but I couldn’t have been more wrong and it didn’t hit me till I left your house”

“Then why did you?”

“I…”

It was as if all the words were caught in my throat with no way out.

What was I meant to say? What could I say? Anything I thought of wouldn’t excuse the way I’d walked out on her. I would be lucky if she could’ve even look me in the eyes again, much less forgive me.

“I was a coward”

She shakes her head, averting her gaze down to her lap.

“So much so that it made me lose you”

I hear a sigh and I couldn’t decipher whether she was disappointed or annoyed.

“I should’ve stayed. I should’ve given this a fighting chance. It was unfair, cruel and undeserved. You were the first person to show me kindness and it scared me. I didn't know how to receive that kind of care and I know that isn't an excuse, but that was the reason and I can't tell you how sorry I am"

The silence was the most painful part. It sent knives straight through my chest and there was nothing I could do to alleviate that burn.

“I understand if you want me to leave. I deserve that”, I sobbed,

Picking at the lose thread on my uniform, when she takes my hand.

“I don’t want that”, she finally spoke,

"You leaving did hurt me and it was something that I thought I'd be angry for, but...I wasn't. I was sad. Sad because I thought you didn't care for me the way I cared for you. You were my favorite part of every single waking moment. Your laugh, your smile, the way you talk, the heart you have, I've never seen anything like it"

I felt every piece of me break with each word.

"This whole time, that's all I could think about. That you didn't feel the same", she continued,

Gathering her own tears now.

"Rhea", I muttered,

Taking her face into my hands.

"You don't understand how much I love you"

[nicecarito]

(English text version below the spanish one)

“ Ugh…. Diablos…Esto se esta haciendo cada vez más difícil día con día. ¿Pero que más puedo hacer? Estoy haciendo todo lo que puedo para mantenerme al margen, ser lo mas productivo posible y no dejarme llevar por mis preocupaciones. Tomo los medicamentos que el psiquiatra me ha recetado y me descargo con mi terapeuta en cada cita … aunque no puedo ser completamente honesto y decirle a detalle lo que me agobia realmente….

¿Cómo puedo decirle a mi terapeuta que guardo el oscuro secreto de mi hermano gemelo? Un secreto que puede destruir a mi familia definitivamente.

¿Cómo le explico que me mata la incertidumbre y el miedo de no volver a ver a mi gemelo con vida, cada vez que sale a completar alguna “misión?

¿Cómo le explico el miedo que tengo de que mi hermano mayor también salga herido o muerto cuando sale a cumplir con su deber como jefe de policía?

¿Qué haré yo si pasan esas cosas?

¿Qué haré si Café llega a enterarse del verdadero trabajo de Doppio y esto le destroza el corazón?

Si Doppio no llega a casa nunca y Café no sabe el por que… ¿Cómo deberé explicárselo?

¿Qué hare con Vanilla? … Ella es la que mas me preocupa… Ella es tan joven… no quiero que llegue a sufrir por esto…

¿Qué haré yo?….

Solo puedo callar, no puedo hacer nada más…

No puedo demostrar mi preocupación, no puedo hacerlo.

Trato de distraerme , tengo más de cinco trabajos que me ayudan a fijar mi atención en cualquier cosa menos en esto…Quiero ver lo positivo del mundo, ver a los otros sin preocupaciones …

Debo sonreír para no preocupar a nadie…

Y debo mantener todo esto para mi mismo… porque mis problemas son míos y de nadie más…

Nadie debería preocuparse por mis problemas, solo yo soy quien puede lidiar con ello…. Aunque este completamente agotado…."

Lungo, el personaje más carismatico , sin embargo, el mas complejo.

(practicamente no puede tener relaciones porque su vida esta echa un despapaye jejeje, el si le da importancia a estar bn primero antes de empezar algo, y las relaciones en las que ha estado son practicamente de solo una noche. Aunque bromeé con Pinzell, el mismo no le pediria en s erio el ser pareja. ojalá haya contestado bn a tu pregunta!)

English Version

" Ugh…. Damn…This is getting harder and harder everyday. But what else can I do? I'm doing everything I can to stay out of it, be as productive as possible and not get carried away with my worries. I take the meds the psychiatrist has prescribed and I vent to my therapist at every appointment…although I can't be completely honest and tell her in detail what is really overwhelming me…..

How can I tell my therapist that I'm keeping my twin brother's dark secret? A secret that could destroy my family for good.

How do I explain to her how I am overwhelmed by the fear of never seeing my twin alive again every time he goes out to complete some "mission"?

How do I explain to her the dread I have of my older brother also getting hurt or killed when he goes out to do his duty as chief of police?

What will I do if such things happen?

What will I do if Café finds out about Doppio's real job and it breaks his heart?

If Doppio never comes home and Café doesn't know why… How should I explain it to him?

What will I do with Vanilla? … She is the one that worries me the most… She is so young… I don't want her to suffer because of this…

What will I do? ….

I can only keep quiet, I can't do anything else….

I can't show my concern, I can't do it.

I try to distract myself , I have more than five jobs that help me to fix my attention on anything but this…I want to see the positive in the world, to see others without worries ….

I must smile so I don't worry anyone ….

And I must keep all this to myself…because my problems are mine and no one else's…..

No one should worry about my problems, only I am the one who can deal with it…. Even if I am completely exhausted…."

Lungo, the most charismatic character, however, the most complex.

[oliversrarebooks]

The Rare Bookseller Part 57: Fitz's Dance

Prev > Masterlist > Next

September 1905

tw: mind control, dehumanization, slavery, kidnapping, drugging

He was being shaken gently, and he managed to crack open his heavy eyes. "Nnnn… let me sleep…"

"You need to wake up now, Fitz," said his master, and Fitz's eyes popped open with a gasp.

"What happened?" he said, looking around. He wasn't in the middle of the party any longer, but seemed to have been taken to a darkened hallway. He could hear the muffled din of the party from a distance -- or maybe it just seemed muffled because his head still felt stuffed full of cotton.

"I did something ridiculous and petty," said Lex. "That rat Jameson wound me up, and instead of ignoring his bait, I just had to show off. I put every thrall in earshot under my power." He sighed. "You must think it's ridiculous. I put both of us in more danger simply for a cheap thrill, and -- why are you smiling like that? Did I not wake you from trance?"

Fitz couldn't hold back the slightly maniacal laugh bubbling up inside him. "Perhaps I'm pleased that my dashing master swooped in to rescue me, and that he made such an ostentatious show of power just because he could."

"You're not upset with me?"

"Lex. Do you really think I would be upset with you for making a big dramatic scene in the middle of a party? I'm just glad that I got to witness it -- well, the beginning of it, anyway. And after that -- Jameson, was it? -- called me filthy cattle and called you a half-wit, he deserved everything he got and more." Fitz leaned in closer to Lex. "You have to tell me about the look on his face. I was trying to stay awake to see it, but… you know."

"Oh, he was absolutely furious, with nothing to say," said Lex, finally returning Fitz's gleeful smile. "As ill-advised an idea as it was, it was very satisfying after what he tried to do to you."

It felt intoxicating, to have Lex defending him so eagerly, to have such a powerful vampire at his beck and call. "That idea barely counts as ill-advised. I used to do a dozen things more ill-advised than that over the course of a normal week."

"It just calls attention to us, which is something I normally prefer to avoid. I'm powerful, yes, but not invincible. It's generally not wise to make yourself a target," he said. He picked up Fitz's aching wrist and gently stroked his thumb across it. "Are you hurt?"

"It's a bit sore, but nothing serious. I'm fine."

"Jameson said you had fallen under the sway of Lord Edgar. Is that true?"

"I wasn't -- I wasn't under a sway," Fitz protested. "I was simply distracted for a minute and got separated from you. That's all."

Lex cupped his cheek. "Fitz, you have to tell me what happened so I can be on my guard against it."

"Damn you and your eyes," said Fitz, caving to Lex's worried look as he always did. "…He had a pocket watch out, hypnotizing some other thrall," Fitz admitted sheepishly. "I stupidly looked at the damned thing, and the next thing I knew, I couldn't look away. Ugh, I made a fool of myself."

"You didn't make a fool of yourself. Edgar is an old, prominent vampire, and his enthrallment skills were some of the best in the city before Lily and I were sired. Steer clear of him, and watch yourself around any other vampires using their powers, all right?" He squeezed Fitz's hand. "Do you want to leave? If you don't want to be here any more, we can leave. I wouldn't think any less of you."

"What? No. This is by far the most interesting thing that's happened to me in weeks," said Fitz honestly. "I can handle it. And if I can't, well… you'll bail me out, won't you, sir?"

Lex sighed. "You might be the death of me yet," he said fondly, running his hand through Fitz's hair and planting a kiss on his forehead. "If you're that eager to stay, we can. But the dance will likely be starting soon, and I might not be able to keep my eyes on you."

"What, you're not going to dance with me?"

"Of course I will, but during this dance, it's customary to constantly switch partners. Thralls need to dance with whatever vampire wishes. We'll very likely be separated, and someone like Jameson might even take the opportunity to harass you."

"I'm not afraid of Jameson," Fitz lied, pushing the memories of how his skin itched from Jameson's vampiric aura, how for one bleak moment he was sure he was going to die.

"Perhaps you should be," said Lex. "Edgar as well. Vampires who keep their thralls in deep, mindless states are often not friendly towards humans. The only reason they'll refrain from drinking from you and doing as they please is because they believe you're my property."

"Aren't I? You did purchase me."

"You're much more than that, and I truly hope you know that," said Lex. "But as I've told you before, most vampires here would think I'm a deviant for having such… feelings… for a thrall."

"And what's wrong with being a deviant?" said Fitz with a blinding grin.

"…Vampire society, like human society, isn't kind to those who violate the unspoken rules." Lex glanced at the end of the hallway. "Well, if we're going to return, perhaps we should before the dance starts." He took Fitz's arm in an uncomfortably tight grip, clearly still upset about another vampire having laid a hand on his thrall, and Fitz couldn't help the little thrill he felt about that.

Fitz was dazzled all over again by the costumes and spectacle as they re-entered the main ballroom. Lex, however, was scanning the crowd with a purpose. "I suppose I should find someone agreeable to mingle with, before someone less agreeable notices I'm free. Maybe -- oh, there she is."

Fitz was pulled toward a small gathering of thralls, some of them kneeling, some of them swaying gently, all of them with dazed and blissful smiles. "What vampire brought an entire herd with them?"

"She didn't bring a herd of thralls. A herd of thralls simply forms around her at these events, since so many of them are attuned to her voice."

The group parted enough to reveal a petite woman in a beautiful green gown, her matching mask bearing several sparkling peacock feathers. Despite her small size, she had a commanding presence, and Fitz felt her voice before he could even make out what she was saying, felt it resonating somewhere deep in his mind.

"Miss Lily," he said, memories of the auction house flooding back. The logical part of him thought that he should feel fear or anger at the sight of the woman who kidnapped him, but the deeply ingrained thoughts of hypnotic bliss were stronger. Besides, if it weren't for her, he never would have met Lex.

"Oh, if it isn't dear Fitz!" she said, and Fitz felt powerless to move as she approached and laid a hand on his cheek. "You look well. I assume your master has been treating you right?"

"Yes, sir," he said far too quietly. Just the proximity to Lily was sinking him back into a hypnotic daze. He shook himself out of it, cursing under his breath. "I've been taking good care of Lex here," he said with a mischievous grin, grabbing Lex's arm.

"Good, he needs someone to take care of him."

"I'm hardly that hopeless," said Lex. "I see you've gathered quite a crowd."

"I speak, and thralls listen," she said with a smug grin. "Although I don't usually flaunt it as dramatically as you did earlier. I saw that little stunt with Jameson." She leaned in towards Fitz. "And I saw you spit in his face. I knew there was a reason you were one of my favorite thralls."

Fitz didn't bother to fight the warmth blooming in his chest at Lily's praise. "He was about to drink me, sir. I hardly had a choice in the matter unless I wanted to become some oaf's midnight snack."

Lily laughed. "As much as he did deserve it, be careful. Lord Jameson has few friends, but there are also many vampires who won't suffer the presence of a disrespectful thrall. You should know that, Lex."

"I don't keep Fitz on a leash like a dog, and you know that. He's free to do and say what he wants. Anyone who takes issue with that can answer to me," said Lex, and Fitz's heart fluttered.

"Between that and your all-too-obvious affection… you do realize that our sire is going to hear about this, right? I don't know how he knows, but he does."

"So let him stew in his manor. Perhaps someday soon, he'll also have to answer to me." Despite his bold words, Lex's face showed his concern, and Fitz couldn't help the suppressed fear bubbling to the forefront. "But let's not talk about him. This is a party. You've been working so much that I've hardly even seen you. Don't you want to make merry?"

"I never thought I'd see the day when you were telling me to be more merry. Fitz really must be taking good care of you," she said.

They laughed and chatted for a bit longer, until a cacophony from the stage at the back of the ballroom served as the announcement that the band was setting up. Around them, vampires took their thralls by the arms and began to gather on the dance floor.

"Shall we?" said Fitz, offering his arm before Lex had the chance. Lex smiled and took it, allowing Fitz to lead him on.

"Dance with whatever vampire engages you. I'll find you at the end of the dance," said Lex quietly as the music started up. "And, you know…"

"I'll try not to offend their delicate sensibilities," said Fitz. "For supernaturally strong immortal beings, some of them seem quite fragile."

"Too much time spent with nothing but mindlessly fawning thralls and spawn will do that."

Fitz placed his hand on Lex's back and began to effortlessly lead him through the room in a waltz. His dance lessons were some of the only lessons he'd actually enjoyed as a lad, and he was proud of how graceful his steps were, how Lex easily followed. He'd always lamented that his skill in dance would be wasted in stuffy society balls; he'd never expected he'd be using it to weave in and out of masked vampires, his heart brimming with the thrill of being one of the few lucid lambs among the wolves.

And as they twirled around, Fitz could hardly tear his gaze off of Lex's intense blue eyes, boring into him with such intensity that he couldn't imagine any other vampire cutting in. "I'm surprised vampires allow their thralls to dance with anyone else. An unusual tradition."

Lex shrugged. "The mild taboo of it is what makes it interesting, I suppose. The power play, the chance to touch a thrall you could otherwise never."

Fitz could understand the intriguing novelty of that. "Oh? And is there a thrall here you've just been dying to touch?"

"Only you," said Lex. "Although I suppose others here would enjoy touching you as well. I'll have to endure it."

"They're all staring at us," said Fitz, watching heads turn as he glided past, unable to deny the thrill of desirability. "We just might be the most handsome pair here."

"That may be true, but that's not the only reason they're staring. It's because you're leading."

"Leading?" Fitz hadn't even thought about it, falling back into his lessons. "We're both men, though. Does it matter who leads?"

"Yes, but not because we're both men, but because you're a thrall leading a vampire."

Of course, he should've realized that -- every social rule Fitz stumbled across seemed to revolve around keeping thralls beneath them. He continued to lead the dance with renewed stubbornness now that he knew it was a transgression, and Lex kept following. "If that's so, then what happens if two vampires dance? Or two thralls?"

"If it's two vampires, the more powerful one leads, and yes, this has led to actual brawls on the dance floor. If it's two thralls… no one cares."

Before Fitz could question Lex further, a female vampire in a sleek dress that would have been considered scandalous in human company tapped Lex on the shoulder. In a swift motion, Lex bowed to her and motioned to Fitz. Ah, right, trading partners. He curtsied to the woman and took the lead on instinct before he remembered he wasn't supposed to be doing that.

The vampire laughed. "A thrall that leads the dance! That's such an adorable parlor trick. And you're skilled at it, too, aren't you?"

"I like to think so, sir," said Fitz, suppressing the urge to keep his eye on Lex. He'd be fine, he could handle himself.

"It's just the cutest thing when vampires let their thralls think they're so independent. And Mr. Alexander is so handsome, too! You're a lucky boy, aren't you?"

Okay, perhaps he couldn't handle himself, gritting his teeth against the insinuation that his free will was an illusion. Thankfully, before he had to form a response, another vampire cut in, grabbing the lead from Fitz before he realized it. This vampire didn't say anything, but he had an appraising, hungry look in his eye that Fitz found unnerving.

His mind was still spinning with what the previous vampire had said -- that thralls like him just think they're independent. It wasn't true, obviously. He was still himself, still had his own thoughts.

…But of course, if Lex had used his prodigious hypnotic powers to subdue Fitz in ways he didn't even realize…

Another vampire cut in, and Fitz momentarily thought it would be a reprieve from that uncomfortable gaze, until he realized who he was now dancing with.

"If you think your master will shield you from all consequences of disrespecting me, you're sorely mistaken," said Jameson, pulling Fitz along in a clumsy facsimile of dance, with a tight and furious fake smile.

Fitz swallowed his fear and put on a contemptuous face. "Well, if you're going to punish me, sir, get on with it. Or are your atrocious dancing skills my punishment?"

"Oh, it will be so deeply satisfying to silence you forever," he said.

"Is that a threat, sir?"

"It's a vision."

Someone tapped Fitz's shoulder, and he was more than eager to let another vampire cut in and escape from Jameson. He turned, and was swept up by a man in an impeccably tailored suit, wearing a sparkling white mask with blue feathers, gliding easily across the dance floor. Fitz looked up and found himself looking into deep, dark eyes.

"That's it, boy. Focus," said the soft but firm voice. "Look straight into my eyes."

Fitz swallowed hard, eyes widening, as he felt himself practically falling into those eyes, completely unable to look away. As his brain caught up to what was happening, he realized that this was the same vampire who had been swinging the pocket watch earlier, the one who had captured his attention so easily -- Lord Edgar, Lex had said.

The other vampire he was supposed to stay away from.

"There you are. Everything has its place, and you need to be put in yours, don't you?" he said. "I saw your little stunt earlier. A born thrall like you would be so much happier with your will dissolved into obedience."

"N-no… what are you trying to do, sir…?" Fitz managed to get out, struggling against the unnatural urge to obey and submit. This Lord Edgar was bold enough to entrance Fitz right on the dance floor, right under Lex's nose, and Fitz found himself powerless to stop it.

"Your master isn't giving you what you crave. You need real guidance, real power. It's written all over your face."

"I… don't…" He could feel his will being locked down, a cage with no escape.

"May I have this dance?" said another nearby voice.

"I'll see to you later, then," said Edgar, passing Fitz over to…

"You looked like you needed a bit of rescuing," said Miss Lily. "Don't ever say I haven't done anything for you."

"You're the reason I'm here in the first place," Fitz pointed out as he regained his senses. "…But yes, thank you."

Miss Lily glanced over at Edgar. "He had you under his spell, didn't he? What was that about?"

"Punishment for speaking my mind with Jameson, sir, at least I think."

"Hmph, figures. I didn't think anyone would actually want to defend Jameson… knowing Edgar, it's probably more that he doesn't like so-called disrespectful thralls." She smiled at Fitz as she led him in the dance. "No taste, if you ask me. I think I did an excellent job with you."

"You had high quality material to work with, sir." This vampire gathering certainly made Miss Lily seem like the lesser of many evils.

"I don't see Lex anywhere in this crowd, do you?"

The room was a dizzying chaos of elaborate gowns and masks, vampires and thralls crowded together. "No, sir, I don't."

"When you see him again once the dance ends, let him know what Edgar said to you. And be careful!"

"You're concerned for my wellbeing now, sir?"

"Why of course, you're my dear Lex's precious thrall. And if anything happens to you, I'll have to deal with him moping and whining for months."

Lily relinquished Fitz to another vampire trying to cut in, and Fitz was barely paying attention to who it was, nodding his head to whatever they were talking about. He was trying to spot Lex in the crowd -- or, failing that, to make sure he kept his distance from Jameson and Edgar. He was passed to another vampire, and then the next, and just as he was starting to get frustrated, his thoughts scattered to the winds, mind filling with haze.

"Why hello there, you cute thing!" Lady Jessica patted his cheek, cooing at him. "You're just the sweetest, aren't you?"

"Uh… sweetest…yes, sir…" said Fitz, once again fighting against a current of mind-bending power, this one threatening to drain him of his thoughts.

"Such an adorable, dazed look on your precious little face! Oooh, I could just eat you up! I know Mr. Alexander would never allow it, though, so I'll just have to imagine how good you taste."

Fitz's mind, already compromised from various enthrallments and the high concentration of vampire auras in the room, had little defense against Jessica turning it to mush. "Yeah… I'm looking for him, sir… for Lex…"

"Awww, the poor little thrall misses his master! Of course you do, sweetheart. Let's see if we can find him?"

He nodded dumbly. That sounded good. He'd like to be in Lex's arms where he was safe. The room was too loud, too bright, and and too chaotic for his dampened mind.

"Excuse me, Lady Jessica," said a voice behind him. He recognized that voice. This was important. Who was it?

Jessica pressed Fitz to her chest protectively. "Aw, I have to give this doll up already? If you insist."

And Fitz, already incapacitated by Jessica, had very little defense as he found himself looking all too deep into Edgar's eyes again.

"Focus. There you are," he said, with a firmness that indicated he wasn't going to miss his target this time. "Look deep into my eyes, and sleep in my will."

"Nnnnn," Fitz groaned, succumbing all too quickly. He was being pulled, taken somewhere, and he dimly realized he was in danger of something more than being insulted and condescended to. "Lex --"

A hand clamped over his mouth before he could do more than weakly call out. "None of that. You will sleep. Sleep. Sleeeeeep."

Fitz felt his limbs grow heavy, his vision blurring as his eyelids drooped. He was someplace darker than the ballroom, now. The hand left his mouth, but before he could react in his drowsy state, a cloth with a noxious smell was pressed hard to his face.

"This will help you sleep," whispered the calm and commanding voice in his ear. "Go to sleep now, boy. Just sleep."

He was too weak and enthralled to try and pull the cloth away, to do anything but let his head spin and consciousness fade. His last thought before going under was that Lex would be so mad at him.

Prev > Masterlist > Next

Next week, the conclusion to Fitz's little adventure.

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[zhivaoverdrive]

Saline Thief, 3

At this moment, all Amy wished was that the nurse would speak quietly. But alas.

"Now, I know it says scheduled fill here, but it's been a while since we've seen you!" chirped the nurse Laura, as the two women walked from the waiting room.

"I've just been b-" Amy began.

"XL expander implants, 8000cc capacity! Wow" said Laura, her tone hovering between playful and concerning.

"So much room to grow, but maybe we can max you out today!" she continued.

"This is absurd" thought Amy to herself.

"Here I am, struggling to keep walking pace, my tits pumped so huge they're pulling me off balance with every step.

I don't own any bras, I can't even find a place to custom make me one.

This nurse KNOWS what I've done, why is she teasing me this way? Should I just admit it-"

Entering the room, Laura motioned for her to sit.

"Okie dokie! shirt off. Let's see what we can do today huh!" said the nurse gleefully.

Moment of truth, perhaps time to rip the bandaid off?

Surely the charade would end once her monstrously expanded breasts were exposed.

Noone can look at what I've done to myself... and let me go further. 

These spheres I'm attached to, their tortured vein covered skin, areolas stretched as wide as a palm.

Amy had been trying to adjust as quickly as she could, but the damage from her night missions was... incalculably.  Unmanageable.

She still didn't have an accurate count, but her '8k expanders' must have been closer to 30,000cc than they were 8. "Sweetie, if you don't mind me saying..." began Laura

Here it comes. I've been such an idiot. Why did I get so ahead of myself...

I should have stayed home, ghosted this place. What did I expect to happen

"You're looking GREAT for only 4500cc! 

I know you've got your heart set on hitting your implant capacity today, but..."

UGH. I don't remember saying that. This is all her idea, she's baiting me.

Wants me to admit what I've done. To save myself.

I can't take any more filling! She knows it!

"Well. Let's not get ahead of ourselves... I can't recommend overfilling you too much, the weight could start to really affect your life you know!" said Laura, as she gently caressed Amy's orbs, either testing their elasticity or appreciating her grossly stretched skin, riddled with veins and stretch marks.

"Doubling your size today with a teeny overfill would really be pushing the limit... you're such a slight girl after all!"

The nurse causally connected the filling apparatus as she spoke, consulting the small electronic control unit in her hand every now and then, when she wasn't touching Amy's hopelessly inflated breasts, that is.

“Try to hold still Amy! You’re wiggling all over the place. Can’t you stand up still for just a moment?” chastised Laura, as her patient struggled to manage the immense burdens in her chest.

Even seated, Amy struggled to stay upright without moving, she was already exhausted…

“I’ve hurt my back-” Amy tried to explain, to no avail.

Nurse Laura grinned. It wasn’t malicious, but it wasn’t friendly.

“You’ll have to look after your back sweetie, they’re not going to get any lighter!

"Rest on the desk, let's get lefty up to capacity, then see how we're looking, shall we? I'll be back to check on you soon!"

[yesimwriting]

MA'M I LOVE YOUR BEST FRIEND FELIX WRITINGS BUT MY JEALOUS AND SOFTY SHORT ASS CAN'T HANDLE IT 😭 IM HURTING MYSELF BUT IT HURTS SO GOOD, LIKE IF I WAS BEST FRIEND Y/N ID BE BAWLING MY EYES OUT AFTER SEEING HIM WITH ANOTHER GIRL LIKE- WHY IS ALL OF THIS SO CARDIGAN BY TS CODED-

a/n i love taylor and taylor related angst and i get the jealousy thing,, but i think the thing with bestfriend!felix is that he's so obvious about his priorities that by the time reader can register jealousy,, felix is already there

so here's a drabble

----

Going out tonight wasn't your idea. A week of long lectures and even longer homework had drained you. But Felix wanted to...and you...You wanted to be around Felix.

Maybe Farleigh's comments about you following Felix around like a puppy aren't as exaggerated as they feel when you're sober. Ugh. The thought of Farleigh being right gives that pinch of irritation something to latch onto.

"They have those drinks you like." The voice is clear despite the base of the music that you can still hear from right outside the club. You turn your head away from the group of stragglers hanging around the outdoor bar. "Had. I got the last one."

You grin at Felix, any lingering angst not exactly evaporating into the cool night air, but the shift is enough to make the smile feel unforced. "Lucky."

He's finally within arm's reach, a fact that he takes advantage of immediately. Felix's palm settles against your shoulder, his thumb dragging across your skin. "Extremely." There's a fondness there that chips away at what's left of your irritation. "Here." You take the glass from him. "Sam almost tackled another bar tender to get the last of the simple syrup."

Ironically, the sip that's halfway down your throat seems to lose any hints of sweetness as soon as the words come out of Felix's mouth. You've met Sam, and while you don't dislike her, you're not sure the neutrality is mutual.

It's a fact you don't dwell. Sam's a bottle blonde bar tender who looks like she was born to walk around in low cut tank tops and cut off shorts. Not that her being pretty matters, but there's an edge to her beauty that implies an effortless coolness that doesn't usually meld with who you are. It's no one's fault. You think those types of girls are charming and fun in a way that's somehow even bolder than the friends that you consider wild. It's just never been a mutual admiration.

And Sam's been hanging around Felix a lot lately, showing up at parties, staying later than anyone else besides you. They've gone home together a few times. Felix hasn't said too much about that, but that doesn't indicate anything. You guys don't talk about that kind of stuff. Even best friends as close as you two have boundaries.

Not that it matters if Felix is with someone like Sam. She seems fun and pretty and bold and--the total opposite of you.

That hits you like a thumb jabbing into a bruise. Since when is Felix's constantly rotating door of flings a sore point? When he pawns you off on Farleigh--even when he's not in the mood for you--so he can have a moment in the employee bathroom.

"Y'okay?"

You nod, "Yeah." Felix's eyebrows pinch together, a barely there implication of concern that's almost ignorable beneath the poor lighting. "Everything's just kind of hitting me a little."

He nods, "Do you need to sit?" Felix's hold on your shoulder tightens. "Is that why you came outside?"

"Uh--no." The response feels flat. "I mean--yeah, I wanted some air, but I don't feel sick or anything."

He watches you openly for what feels like its own eternity. You're not sure what he's looking for, but you must not pass the inspection because he frowns. "Okay." As if to validate Felix's attempt at letting your mood go, you bring your glass back to your lips. "You know--if you're not feeling--if you want to go, you can tell me."

"I know." You do know that. Felix has always been good about listening, about wanting to make sure you're comfortable.

You take another sip of your drink. Of course Sam's good at mixing drinks. You can picture her tripping over herself, rushing to grab the nearly empty bottle of syrup and risking making an enemy of a coworker to avoid having to tell Felix no.

Felix takes a step forward, his hand sliding across your back so that his arm can settle around your shoulders. It's instinct to lean into the contact. He's warm in a way that rivals the buzz in your system. "When we do go, we're going to have to go out the back way."

You let your head rest against his side. "Why?"

"Don't think Sam's going to be going out of her way to get me drinks again."

You crane your neck to look up at him, "What? Why?"

His eyes meet yours, and then he's dropping his gaze to the floor. "You have become such a gossip."

A sound that's a combination between a scoff and a laugh tumbles past your lips. "Have not."

"You and Farleigh," Felix continues, "You two always need to ask, always need to have an opinion."

"Not true," you defend weakly, "If I was a gossip I'd talk about how slutty--"

You cut yourself off, regretting your phrasing as soon as the word is out. Felix pulls back slightly, mouth falling open in exaggerated offense. "You called me a slut?"

"No," you defend yourself through a laugh, "I was saying that you have been slutty." Felix raises his eyebrows at you. "It's different." Felix's eyes narrow in an attempt to offset the smile tugging at his lips. "It is."

"Yeah?" He leans forward with no warning, his lips pressing against your cheek. That kiss is followed by another. Again and again, each more affectionate and touchy than the last.

His lips brush against your jaw. "Fe-lix." It wants to be a warning, but the nervous giggle that breaks his name into two makes coming off as threatening impossible.

"What?" He hums, his lips finding your neck. "If I'm that slutty, we should have a go at it."

You laugh, ignoring the heat burning its way up your neck because it's just Felix. "There's a bathroom inside."

Felix stills before pulling away enough to look you in the eye. There's the faintest flush tinging his skin. You laugh again, this time the sound fuller. It's nice to see flashes of the softer side of Felix while out in the real world. Felix laughs with you.

You tilt your head, pressing a kiss against his cheek. "For you, I'd spring for a hotel room."

"Now I feel special."

----

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