#WOW i need to sleep

[py6oto]

DAY 5 - OUTSIDE

almost missed today too. i really need to stop leaving these for 11 pm

2023.10.05

[justarandombrit]

I don't know

[hinamie]

cursed kids v2 ⚠️👹

i've been a jjk first years stan since day one and have been wanting to redraw the first art i did featuring the three of them

[carnivalcarriondiscarded]

rough day...

[fatuismooches]

At the beginning of your relationship with Dottore, there had been numerous times when he had tried to leave you, or rather, attempt to force you to leave him in the Akademiya. Ignoring you, snapping at you... most notably literally kicking you out of the dorm (to waking up and nearly stepping on you, as you had decided to knock out right at the door.) Merely because he still had difficulty believing he was loved by you, despite having known you for years. It took much time but, eventually, your feelings finally clicked in that genius head of his.

However, uncharacteristically enough, there was one time you debated on whether you should leave Zandik. Only one time. And he had found out. If only you had been more careful.

It happened during the later stage of your illness when your ability to do many basic tasks had been stripped from you, leaving you reliant on Zandik for many things. You felt very guilty, for making him so do much work for both himself and you, but there wasn't much you could do about it, being the way you were now. Did you tell your lover about this? No, of course not.

But today, today would just be another regular day of what you had accepted to be your new life. However, you had noticed in the morning he seemed rather irritated, but you had no chance to ask him about it since he had to leave for class. You wondered what that was all about. (You, somewhere in the depths of your mind thought. You were continuously being a burden on the knowledge-driven scholar, no wonder he'd be irritated.)

When he returned to the dorm, you could tell that the foul mood still remained. Though, you could not understand what had caused it. He was perfectly fine last night, something must have happened after you fell asleep... As you watched him, the words "welcome home" could not seem to come out as they usually did, especially when he had not even acknowledged you yet, only emptying his bag with all of his books and other tools. You swallowed nervously, wondering how you were going to go about this when he spoke.

"Where?"

"Huh?"

"Where do you plan to go?" You were understandably confused by this seemingly random question.

"Um... nowhere?" A nervous smile made its way to your face, as Zandik only gave you a blank look, before carefully unfolding a piece of paper, and reading it over once more, no emotion on his face. Which, was already quite alarming for you, because Zandik was the kind of person who always had a hint of annoyance written on his face. He then turned the paper to face you and you squinted, reading the contents.

Oh. You instantly recognized what it was. It was a form that one had to fill out if they wanted to move out of the Akademiya's dorms.

When you said you felt guilty for everything, you meant it. Meant it to the point you worried if you were still good enough for him, if you had become annoying, a bumbling nuisance that had become more of a chore rather than a partner. It worried you, and you couldn't help but think about it. What if you were right? What if he did feel all of those things? Then maybe, maybe you should relieve him of this burden. You. Then, he could continue to pursue his goals, without the added hindrance of taking care of you.

It wasn't something you were set on yet, more like something you mulled over in your head. But you had filled out the potential moving out form tentatively just in case you decided to go through with it. Ah, you probably had shoved it in your bag along with your many missing assignments, and Zandik must have found it after trying to check your homework... But now, your lover was staring holes into you, expecting an answer.

"Well, I- I didn't mean it. It was... just in case," you were just spewing words at this point because you really had no defense. After all, how do you explain to your roommate of many years that you were going to move out and disappear without telling him?

"Just in case," the scholar repeats. "Just in case..." And then Zandik laughs. At what? You're not sure, because you've only seen him laugh at other people's foolishness, or in scorn and bitterness. It's a bit unsettling, seeing him act this way, but you have no time to think about it before the paper is torn right in half twice and then abandoned in the trash bin.

"No." Well... alright then.

"Za-"

"No, no no no. How utterly absurd. Ridiculous. You are not going anywhere." The way he says it simultaneously sounds like an order to you yet also an attempt to reassure himself of your impossible departure. You wondered if he interpreted your reason for leaving as something more... drastic.

"Hey-" You stand up, hoping an embrace would calm his nerves, but he begins to pace around. Now, this wouldn't be unusual, he tends to do this while he's ranting or deeply thinking about his research but obviously, it's different this time.

"Leave? No," Zandik scoffs to himself, "the possibility is nigh on impossible. There is no need to plan for such lengths, I shall make sure it doesn't come to that." When he finished mumbling to himself, you tried to interject before his gaze snapped back to you.

"And you. You, how dare you go behind my back and do such a thing? Do you think me incompetent? Do you think me a senseless fool that I would allow you to do this?"

"..."

"I find this quite tasteless, especially after how much you parroted about 'always being by my side' or 'never leaving'. Or have you finally shown your true colors? Leaving me after-" Zandik cut himself off because the words he was going to say next shouldn't be said out loud. Leaving him after he's already obsessed with you, when he's already in love with you and would go mad without your presence. But then all he could feel was your arms around him and your face buried in his chest.

"Zandik please, I'm sorry," your voice was but a whisper. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean anything like that." Zandik's hands itched to hold you back, but he restrained himself, needing to hear your reasoning.

"I don't want to leave you, I really don't. I love you! So... that's why I filled that form out. Because I... am scared of burdening you too much. I know how you are. I know you want someone who is useful, w-who can be of assistance in all kinds of ways, not someone who is dead weight. So I... I don't want you to force yourself to- ow!" Your increasingly pitiful dialogue was interrupted by a flick to your forehead and the clicking of a tongue.

"Fool..." he moved his hand to rest on the top of your head. "You can be quite intelligent, but the reasons for your stupidity can be headache-inducing sometimes. Now that you've said all of that, has it clicked how idiotic it sounds?" Though your partner's words sounded harsh, his tone was noticeably softer. You could only cast your gaze downward as he sighed.

"I too wonder why you do not take your own advice. Were you not the one who said to... 'talk things out', before jumping to conclusions? So why have I not heard of this?" (The phrase feels out of place and rather disgusting on the man who normally refuses to hold a conversation on anything other than research, but he forces it out for your sake. Unfortunately, he can also hear your sing-song voice in his head as he replays the words.)

"Because... it's dumb, like you said. I shouldn't waste your time anymore..."

"I usually do not entertain dumb inquiries but... you are an exception. My assistant's questions must always be clarified." And as his lover, your troubles must always be assuaged, but that part was left unsaid, although you knew what he meant. "Yes, your usefulness was a great help, but I couldn't care less about that right now. I care about you, and if taking on extra responsibilities happens to fall under that feeling, then so be it. I don't care," Zandik said bluntly. Was it elegant? No. Was it truthful? Yes. It made your cheeks warm a bit.

"Well... thank you for the honor," you couldn't help but crack a tiny smile as Zandik only mumbled something incoherent before pushing you back to bed. Ah, you were feeling a little drained from all of that.

"Now that all that is sorted out, and that hopefully every inch of that nonsense has left you, I suggest you go to sleep quickly, unless you want to be kept awake by the sounds of my latest experiment." You only giggled at your boyfriend. He's unkind... in a kind way if that made sense. But before you could be whisked away to the land of dreams, Zandik spoke once more.

"[Name]."

"Mhm?"

"...Do not try to leave me ever again."

"...I know, Zandik."

[martyryo]

his biggest sin was having blue hair and pronouns.

[housecow]

the difference between these two 🥺 both??

funny story though. my roommate is still taking food but my memory is so bad when it comes to things i don’t eat myself (adhd)

when i talk to friends and family about the situation the first thing they ask is, “are you sure you’re not sleep eating?” which is adorable. they wanna believe, even if for a second, that maybe i’m not truly at fault for making myself into such a cow 🥺 i get it bc im getting very fat even with the thievery but at the same time. im literally being gaslit

[marciliedonato]

you know what really gets my goat... all the people on that sub got to experience at least 4.5 decades of life. they got to explore and travel, they went to college, they found love, built families, established careers and got their name out there, they got to make some sort of mark in the world....all of them except for the kid. this dude was only 4 years (maybe 3) younger than me. he was barely a legal adult, still a teenager. prob didn’t even know much life outside of school, prob was only now starting or hadn’t been to college yet, hadn’t had a chance to experience life as an adult yet.... and he wasn’t even really supposed to be on that sub. 

he *didn’t* want to go. he was TERRIFIED. he was the only person on that stupid tuna can death trap with any semblance of common sense. dude basically got dragged there by his rich ass dad  (literally the richest family in pakistan for crying out loud) bc yall know how it is with rich ppl (SPECIALLY the billionaires) : business over everything, live to work but don’t work to live, family is secondary, etc etc...dude probably didnt get to spend much time with his dad bc he most likely wasnt around most of the time and was all work work work but knew he (the dad) wanted to go, prob wanted him to go as well and tried persuading him to join. and even though something didn’t feel right to him, it was father’s day weekend and he must have felt like he owed it to his dad to go and took the risk bc he trusted his dad/wanted to make him happy even though his gut feeling said not to and he really didn’t want to do it. ik he ‘was an adult’ technically, but he was literally only 19 and parental approval gets people to do stupid shit they probably wouldnt otherwise do against their better judgement...  

they literally confirmed (his aunt) he only went to bond with his dad...and instead his dad basically dragged him to both their deaths....this is so fucked. irresponsible and selfish. everyone else knew damn well at their big ages that was stupid and it was only a matter of time before something seriously tragic happened. and this guy knew better than to drag his kid into this knowing he probably would do it just bc it was his dad and a grown ass adult that could probably be trusted bc he’s ‘wiser and more experienced in life and knows better than a 19 y.o’ ...and now they’re all dead. literally fuck off for this

[sluckythewizard]

[PUT INTO PLACE, TIED DOWN AND ARRANGED, AND IS NEVER THE SAME, AGAIN.]<-listen to my favorite songs. VAMPIRES ARE WONDERFUL ARENT THEY. THE FLESH IS SO MUCH MORE DURABLE. SO MUCH STRETCHIER THAN HUMANS. THE STRESS DOESNT KILL A VAMPIRE THE SAME WAY IT DOES A HUMAN. YOU CAN TAKE THEM APART THREAD BY THREAD AND LEAVE THEM WIDE AWAKE WITHOUT WORRY OF THE BRAINMATTER SPOILING UNDER VINEGARY AGONY.

[pivsketch]

back on my bullshit again-- i started this stardew villager sprite overhaul project like 8 years ago (2016!) and picked it back up recently. the great news (sarcasm) is that the game updates since then have given me twice as much work to do as everyone has cute little beach and winter outfits now? im going to endeavor to at least get shane done (#biased) but i did dream of getting to everyone. we'll see how far i get this time.

heres an elliott doing a silly dance because i saw the frames in his sheet and thought it was cute

[thecanvascreature]

It’s 1:30 in the morning

Sooooo worth it for old men yaoi.

[weirdowhodraws1214]

GOOOOOODDD MORNING MURDER DRONES FANS (it is currently 2:50 am while I’m writing this)

Have this lovely piece of traditional art of murder drones I spent 6-7 hours on (yes my body hurts)

[allthegothihopgirls]

the character study potential of those early rhato issues where jason wiped his memories, and met roy and kori again with a completely blank slate...

up until then he'd been completely deflective of how his relationship with both of them was changing, and how he was actually growing to enjoy their company, above his previous solitude.

he'd been masking a lot of it with petty remarks he could no longer use. how does he perceive the relationship he must have had with them, with nothing but a first impression?

having lost any and all feelings he had about them, and being forced to approach them in complete neutrality, what does he feel? (disregarding the actual canon events that take place + form his new biases). is he able to understand why these people are friends? or is it completely circumstantial to his character? (which he no longer has)

does his relationship with the two build from their individual identity? or from the memories jason's made with them?

what conclusions do roy and kori draw about how jason's been acting previously? do they see that every negative thing he had to say about their group was backed by a facade?

are they hurt that he can't find it within him to see them as good people based off his judgement alone?

all whilst wondering how it had gotten so bad for him to want to forget everything negative in his life. how deeply his issue ran, to erase every memory he had ever had.

having to determine whether or not their presence in his life was something directly damaging to him, or only by proxy.

[quietwingsinthesky]

i hope in future multidoctor crossovers that ten and thirteen both get lumped into being the emo phase doctors. embarrassing cringe ass emotionally constipated idiots. putting them at their own table in a corner while the other doctors judge them about it (<- also so terrible at emotions but at least theyre subtle about it.) theyre both pouting, bundled up in the giant coats, refusing to acknowledge each other.

[super-nowa-art]

¯\_(ツ)_/¯

[lollytea]

i bet hunter has blonde moments a lot. he is such a little ditz sometimes.