#YES I REUSE MY JOKES SHUT UP

[peepeehard]

Mizu walking out my room after helping me w my period cramps :3

[miinatozakiii]

moonlight serenade

kindergarden teacher!sana x fem!reader. (pt. 3)

summary: sana finds you even cuter after seeing you in shark pj's, you two are hopeless lesbians, you drive sana home and it's more romantic than it should be – oh my god you're not a mother?

wc: 5.3k

warnings: mentions of food, i think that's it ; reader has tattoos ; u two are hopeless romantics ; lesbians being lesbians

pt 1. pt2. pt4.

a/n: I love jazz. I've been listening to jazz in a bakery/cafe while writing each part actually. pls listen to moonlight serenade by ella fitzgerald, it's a work of art and one of my all time favorites :-D

(are lyrics in fics corny? I have no idea. I just love jazz and thought this song was perfect for this part.)

trying to write as much before I move! enjoy ;-]

-

“Are you actually serious?” Jihyo says, placing her cup of coffee down. Sana pinches the bridge of her nose and lets out a small breath,

“Jihyo, I don’t know what to do,” Sana says defeatedly.

Two months have passed by and that means two months of seeing you every now and then. Johnny, your brother, has returned from his business trip, so he ended up being the one to take Hana to school in the morning and the one to pick her up in the afternoon. You, however, were not going to miss the chance to see this lovely woman named Sana. 5'4 inches of pure beauty and charm. So, you convinced him to let you take Hana to school once or twice a week just to see who you think is the woman blessed by Aphrodite. 

I mean, the temperature is dropping, and the warmth that spreads through your body when you see Sana is definitely something you need for this weather.

Every week Sana would see you in the morning once or twice. You two would exchange your friendly greetings before Hana goes off to chat with her new best friend Jiyeong, you’d stare at each other all lovingly (you two are oblivious, it’s sick), and then part ways. Rinse and repeat, reuse, reduce, recycle, etc, this went on for two damn months. 

Sana would never say anything more, she wouldn’t flirt, she wouldn’t ask you out, and she wouldn’t do anything but be friendly. She still believed that you were literally her student’s mother, and there was a guilt that got heavier every time her heart did a flip from seeing you.

Each interaction sparked a small flame in your hearts, and just before it grew bigger, you’d wave goodbye; the flame would die again, never growing large enough to really warm you two the way you both needed.

“Sana… I honestly have no clue what to say,” Jihyo starts, and she looks at the young teacher in front of her, practically losing her mind, “I mean, you’re sure she’s her mom?”

“Yes, I mean, the girl’s dad and her take turns dropping her off and whatnot. I'm not going to be more delusional than I already am trying to find anything that makes her seem less like a mother, I mean, it's clear that she is the mother of that girl.” Sana explains, and her heart sinks a little, “I guess her dad is nice, though, and tall, I don’t know.” Sana groans. 

Jihyo watches Sana stick out her signature little pout and swirl the coffee in her cup, 

“Well… There are always others, no?”

“I don’t know, it’s just something about her Jihyo,” and Jihyo listens with interest, “I just, ever since we met, I feel like, there was some kind of… god this is so embarrassing…” Sana trails off, putting a hand on her forehead and pinching her eyes shut from slight embarrassment. Sana reminisces the way you’d joke about Hana making your wrinkles appear if she kept it up with her little antics, how you’d make her laugh at your little comments, and the way your eyes scan the room for her in the mornings and -

“You’ve been a hopeless romantic since we were roommates, I’ve probably heard worse.” Jihyo sighs, and she reminisces about the days when Sana and she had to share a small single-bedroom dorm, and how she would gush about anything and romanticize everything. 

“Look, she’s just so pretty… Maybe we could just be friends? She’s sweet.” Sana suggests, and Jihyo laughs in disbelief.

“You want to be friends with someone’s mother that you also, or, might have a crush on?”

“Maybe.” 

-

You let yourself in through the front door with your spare keys, hanging your jacket on the coat hanger and sliding your shoes off, setting them on the shoe rack. 

There’s a faint melody of a slow, soft song playing, and there’s a low voice that hums along to the old tune. It fits the atmosphere of the quiet house on a Thursday night.

You creep through the hall quietly to see your brother in the dimmed kitchen washing a few plates. He’s in a navy long-sleeved shirt with its sleeves rolled up so water doesn't temporarily shade his apparel, and loose shorts that go down to just above his knees. His hair is a bit messy, and he looks nerdy with his circular black glasses on. You laugh at the sight of him in his pajamas and slides, he jumps a little and turns his head in surprise after hearing you.

“My god, at least text me.” He sighs, and you chuckle at him. You make your way over to the area where he is and sit across from him at the kitchen island, he directs his attention back to the dirty plate in his hand, “Did you need something?”

“Kinda.”

“You know where everything is, just grab it if you need it. Also, be quiet, Hana just fell asleep.” Johnny responds, turning off the sink and placing the white dish in the dishwasher. 

“It’s not a physical thing, I just… maybe some advice, or at least your thoughts.”

“...On?”

“There’s this girl,”

"Oh," He mumbles quietly, “You’re ready to date again?”

“I think so,” You begin, “She’s different you know. Not like that girl in high school. She’s actually the most beautiful woman I’ve ever seen, and she’s sweet and nice and caring and-”

“How long have you known her?”

“Two months...”

“So it is Ms. Minatozaki.” Johnny scoffs, though, not in an insulting way, more of an ‘I fucking knew it’ way. He picks up a rag and starts to wipe it on the countertop.

You look at your taller brother in surprise, “How did you know?”

“Hana tells me all about you two y’know? Why else would you willingly wake up earlier than you should to drop off my daughter at school? And, she tells me that you ask about her teacher?” He laughs, “You’re not good at hiding things, never have been.”

“Hey!” You say defensively, and a little too loud as it makes him put a finger to his lips,

“Lower your voice.” 

“Sorry.” You mumble, laying your head on your palm. Johnny turns his body to face you instead of the counter connected to the sink that he had previously been wiping,

“Soooo, what are you going to do?”

“I don’t know Johnny.”

“You think she likes you?” He asks, genuinely curious about your new interest. Johnny grabs two glasses of water and places them on the counter, then sits down to the right of you, making sure to give his full attention to you. 

Johnny has always been a good brother, and you two had your necessary brother-sister moments where you were at each other's throats; in fact, you’d bicker all the damn time and it even went on into high school. However, you two always had each other’s backs. Even when you hated each other there would be moments where you two were the only ones who understood each other, and sometimes time seemed to stop when you’d talk about the deeper topics and anything bothering you two. 

And so, time slows down as Johnny listens to your rant.

“We’re friendly, I mean, what am I thinking? I feel slightly delusional I won’t even lie,” You sigh, “She’s so pretty and sweet and I just, I really want to get to know her. Like ever since I met her I felt like… It’s so corny but I swear the world literally paused for a moment.” You add, shifting your look away from your older brother.

How are you supposed to tell your brother that this woman that you’ve known for two months is making you lose some sleep, and, by the way, you haven’t even had a full conversation with her either. You think of the woman that you go out of your way to run into and see for ten minutes a day total, twice a week. You think of her radiant smile that rivals the sun's rays, the voice that’s more soothing than any song on your playlist, and the way her eyes light up when she sees you, and -

“You’re head over heels, huh,” Johnny says, amused.

“Don’t be ridiculous, I barely know her.” you lie,

“Well, you could.”

“And how am I supposed to do that? ‘Oh hey I think of you day and night just because I think you’re cute and nice and I think I almost overfilled a cup of cold brew while daydreaming about you, uh maybe we could go out sometime?’”

“Maybe don’t say that much, dumbass.” Your older brother says playfully, “Just start with a compliment or something, you seriously suck at this romance stuff.”

“Thanks,” You mutter, rolling your eyes, “But what if she thinks that’s weird? I’m literally her student’s aunt.”

“Maybe,” Johnny sighs and finishes the water in his cup, “Maybe you should get some rest, y/n. If you lose sleep over this woman who you’ve never had a full conversation with, imagine how much sleep you’ll lose when you finally do.” He stands up and makes his way over back to the sink to rinse the glass cup you had gotten him for his last birthday, “So, maybe you should catch up on rest now and rant to me when you finally have the balls to actually make a conversation with her, then I could actually give you some decent advice."

“You suck.”

“I want to give you my feedback and advice, but this is literally all I can say right now: ask her out and come back to me.”

“This is too much.”

“You’re a loser, y/n.” Johnny jokes, and he takes the cup that you hadn’t touched away and then rinses it.

-

You don’t even get to plan anything or prepare yourself for your next interaction with Sana, and you look stupid when you run into her too.

You’re at the nearest convenience store in an oversized t-shirt that was your brothers’, the gray shirt with a shark graphic on it that was too comfy to not steal. Paired with that tee were plaid shorts and white socks with more sharks on them that you had gotten from Hana last Christmas, along with grayish-green clogs on your feet. 

You were dressed like a college student that was on a budget, and of course, you had to run into the woman of your dreams at a convenience store at 12:24 am on a Friday night while looking stupid.

Sana had run into you while you scanned the drinks section. You didn’t notice her calling out your name while there was pop music playing in your earbuds, and when you turned to see who had tapped on your shoulder your eyes widened.

Sana held a small basket in her hand, and she wore a purple sweatshirt along with gray sweatpants, much more presentable than what you were wearing. Your face goes red as you realize that she’s caught you looking ridiculous, all while she looks perfect.

Her hair is clipped up and some strands fall over her face, and she looks so unbelievably adorable just standing there smiling at you.

“Hi.” She says, looking you up and down. 

She scans your whole look and gets a little flustered by how precious you look. Your hair is messed up and disheveled at the roots, as if you’d just gotten out of bed and ran a hand through it. The oversized t-shirt drowned your figure in comfort, and your inked, toned forearms were revealed. The t-shirt you wore had a cute shark graphic on it, Sana had guessed that your daughter had something to do with why you had that shirt. She smiles at the sight of you in such comfy clothing, looking lovely as ever while you stare back at her. 

“Hey.” You respond, taking out an earbud,

“It’s surprising to see you here y/n,” Sana giggles, “Thirsty?” She questions, and she’s peeking at the vitamin water in one of your hands.

“I guess so.” You mumble, biting the inside of your cheek and putting a hand in your pocket, “It’s pretty surprising to see you here too.” You add. Surprising, but wow, definitely lucky. When would you ever see her looking so comfy and out of her workplace looking so cute? 

Sana giggles and you feel like a huge gust of wind has hit you so suddenly, about to hit you off your feet. You smile brightly. 

“I couldn’t sleep, I wanted something to snack on,” Sana shrugs. You glance at her basket and see some spicy turtle chips in the basket,

“Eating something spicy at this time is new to me, most people would have something warm, no?”

“Maybe.” Sana mutters, “I like your outfit, by the way.” 

Your ears turn red again and you look down at your clothing, “Yeah… It’s a shirt from Hana’s dad, haha, that’s why it’s so big.”

Sana’s heart sinks a bit at the mention of Hana’s dad. 

Sana and Johnny had met other times, and Sana thought he was nice, sweet, and she can't lie he does has a nice smile, but not as nice as yours. He treated Hana with care; Sana could tell he loved her dearly, as much as you did. 

“I see, I like it. The two of them must love sharks, she always draws them during class.”

“She and her dad are very similar, lots of shark things in the house. I prefer koalas.” You reply. You wonder why the hell you’re mentioning koalas at this time, at this moment in this place, but it doesn’t matter because it seems to spark some kind of conversation with the woman in front of you, and Sana thinks it’s cute, actually. 

“Koalas?” She questions amusingly, "They’re cute. I think hamsters are cuter, though.” 

“hamsters?”

“Mhm.” 

You chuckle at her response and wonder, how does she get cuter every time? Sana turns her head to eye at the drinks, then makes her way to the refrigerator door to grab one for herself, she grabs a canned iced americano and turns her body to face you again, 

“Do you live near? I feel like I would’ve run into you sooner if you did.” Sana says, looking at the can in her right hand. 

“Uh - no. The nearest convenience store closes at 12, so I just drove around until I found one open.” You answer, “Do you live near?” You ask. You wonder if the question is too weird or creepy to ask, I mean, this is a woman you don’t know too well, and would it be weird to ask a person you find so attractive where they live?

“Kind of. It’s a fifteen-minute walk, maybe less, give or take. The one right next to my place is closed too.”

“You walked? At this time?” You question her. Worry takes over your whole body because she walked alone? In the dark? At this hour? 

Sana just hums in response, “Yeah, the neighborhood is really quiet and not too bad.”

“Still, you should’ve driven or something.”

“I don’t drive.” She simply states. You furrow your brows. She just stares back at you with those big brown eyes, it almost makes you forget about worrying.

She walks past you and heads to the self-checkout, you follow. There's a sudden idea that pops up in your mind, and you usually wouldn't be so bold to suggest or ask anything so direct, but it's twelve in the morning and your mind is too scrambled to make or think of any decent decisions.

“Sana,” You murmur, voice just barely above a whisper as you find the confidence for what you’re about to say, “Uh- this might be a little weird to ask, but, um…” You stutter, why the hell are you stuttering? She’s staring at you with those large espresso-colored eyes that remind you of your job at the moment, and the longer she stares back at you the more your mind races. This woman has your heart doing flips and pounding through your chest, you can barely manage your thoughts and words,

“Yes?”

“Uh, could I take you home?” You finally say, barely managing to make eye contact with her and it’s a humbling experience as your usually leveled (at least you think) demeanor crumbles under the presence of this woman.

“You don’t have to. It’s late and I don’t want to cause you too much trouble, y/n.” 

“I’d be much more troubled if I knew you were walking home alone at this time, I insist.”

“Alright then. Let me pay first.”

You pause for a moment and Sana just turns back around, scanning the chips and canned coffee she had in her basket. It’s almost 12:30 now, and a pretty girl is letting you take her home. This wonder of the world is letting your disheveled self take her home.

-

“You have a nice car,” Sana says. She's never had a thing for cars or really knew too much about them. She's only paid attention to Jihyo’s five-seat white Lexus and the black, modified BMW that belonged to her childhood friend Momo. Other cars don't really matter or stand out to her, but Sana’s interest in you grows when she first sees the green Mercedes. Five-seated car looks nice and neat from the outside, for some reason, it really catches her attention. When she sits in the passenger seat she’s hit with the smell of coconut and vanilla. There are two things hung from the internal rearview mirror: One, a small keychain of a koala, and two, a picture of you and Johnny.

Sana can’t help but smile at the picture of you two, you two look happy.

You start the engine and put on your seatbelt before putting the drink you bought in the cup holder. You press on the screen in your car and a slow jazz melody plays. Of course, it had to be a love song. 

“I’ve never seen your tattoos up close, they’re really pretty.” Sana suddenly says as you start to move out of where you were parked. Her eyes scan from your upper forearm, where the tattoo started, and down to where it ended just below your wrist, “I only saw a bit of them when you had dropped Hana off the first day.” Sana added.

She wanted to add on about how she also noticed the tattoo just under your knuckles too, and how she found the ink on your skin so endearing. She wanted to tell you all about the things she found attractive about you. From the noticeable things like your bold features to the little things she’s noted in her mind from every meeting. The way you’d always run a hand through your beautiful hair once or twice, the eye contact you couldn’t hold with her, the way you bit the inside of your cheek when you were quiet, the way your fingers often tugged at the beaded bracelet on your hand, how cute it was to watch you say bye to your daughter, and various other little details. Sana wanted to tell you all about those things, but that would be incredibly weird, right?

“Oh, yeah, thank you. I got the tattoo on my forearm a couple of years ago. Hana picked out the butterfly on my hand last year, actually.” You say, looking at the screen of your car as you back up a bit, making sure you don’t hit anything. 

“Oh, also, you can type the address on my phone. Here.” You add, handing her the device. Sana types in her address quickly and it pops up on the screen. It’s a quick 4-minute drive, and you both wished it were a bit longer.

The music continues to play softly while you two sit in silence, and it somehow makes the mood a bit more intimate whilst the faint sound of Ella Fitzgerald's voice echoes,

I stand and I wait 

For the touch of your hand in the June night 

The roses are sighing 

A moonlight serenade

Your breath hitches, “Um, you can change the song if you want…” You say embarrassed. Sana shakes her head and mumbles, 

“It’s alright. I like it, It’s cute.” She admits, making you blush a bit. You grip the wheel a little tighter as you stop at the red light. The heartfelt lyrics fill the air with a romantic hum, and only the tender melody is heard as you sit together in silence.

The stars are aglow

 And tonight how their light sets me dreaming 

My love, do you know 

That your eyes are like stars brightly beaming?

Sana’s heartbeat skips a little knowing that you listen to such romantic melodies, and she wonders if you love as romantically as such songs. Her mind wanders to the thought of you serenading her in the moonlight, or serenading her in a more domestic setting. The sudden thought of you humming along to these tunes while you cooked or cleaned allowed made her cheeks flush a bit. Jihyo was right: Sana is a hopeless romantic. She’s too far in to get out of the hole of these feelings, and her heart aches a little, the guilt piles up.

You on the other hand are freaking out.

Sana likes your lovey-dovey taste in music, and she seems content (Sana's having a crisis). Maybe you do have a chance with this woman, I mean, she’s already in your car and letting you take her home. Maybe you can do this again, maybe you can listen to songs like this together in a more intimate setting rather than your car, and maybe you can do more than just listen to Ella Fitzgerald together. All the maybe’s in your head are cut short as you reach her place and park in front of her apartment complex. 

“We’re here.” You mutter, and you wish you weren’t.

Sana nods and reaches for the eco-friendly bag she had set down, unbuckles her seatbelt, then turns so that her eyes stare into yours with a new intensity. She puts her left hand on your right hand that had been gripping the gear shift ever so gently, your jaw tenses a bit and your left hand that had been on the wheel tightens its hold once more. She looks from your eyes to your lips, then back to your eyes again. Your heart is suddenly an acrobat the way it's doing so many flips.

“Thank you again, I appreciate it.” She says, and her other hand is on the handle of the door, ready to get out, but she doesn’t.

“Anytime, I didn’t want you to be out alone at this time.” you wonder how that sentence leaves your mouth so calmly because your heart is beating at least two hundred times per minute. 

Sana’s lips curve into a smile again and you relax a bit,

“Well,” Sana starts, and she opens the door, “I’ll see you soon?”

“I’m picking up Hana on Monday.”

“Great. See you then, y/n.” She finally says, turning away and getting out of the car. You two look at each other again and your eye contact lingers a bit before she finally closes the door, waves, and turns to head inside the apartment complex. 

The music continues to play, and your heart longs for her once again.

I stand at your gate

And I sing you a song in the moonlight 

A love song, my darling 

A moonlight serenade

-

A week passes after this encounter, and Sana is currently giving the kids an announcement that might have them jumping off the walls.

“Alright everyone in your seats please.” She says kindly. The students listen to her and shuffle to their seats, some chatter being shared as they do so. Sana claps her hands in a pattern to bring the students’ attention to her, and they clap their hands the same way that she had, quieting down in the process.

“Alright everyone, before I make this announcement, I need everyone to behave and not get too rowdy, okay?”

“Yes Ms. Minatozaki!” The class answers enthusiastically. Sana nods and smiles at them,

“Alright. So, there’s a special trip that is planned for you all next week.” She begins. The kids' faces start to light up after hearing the words “special trip” and almost all of them are itching to get more details on it. Sana’s face seems to light up with theirs from just looking at the excitement on their faces, so she continues,

“Next Wednesday we will be spending the day at the art museum downtown. There are going to be multiple people guiding you throughout the museum, and you’ll be able to learn about the art.” Sana explains, “And, at the end of the trip we’ll all meet back at a special room where you can paint along with an instructor.”

The kids’ smiles grow even wider, some are whispering to each other while others continue to keep their attention on the young teacher. 

“Now, I also wanted to add that we will be needing some chaperones to help look after the class. I have some papers that I’ll give to you, make sure you show them to your mom, dad, or guardian. If they’d like to tag along to help out that would be great, and highly encouraged.” Sana says, pulling out a pile of papers from her desk, she begins to pass around said forms.

-

An hour passes and it’s free choice time. Hana walks up to the young teacher with the form that Sana had previously handed out. Sana smiles at the young girl and tilts her head,

“What is it, Hana? Is everything okay?” The young teacher questions,

“Um, Ms… What does guardian mean? You said mom, dad, and guardian earlier. Does that mean grown up?” Hana asks, and she looks at the paper as if her five-year-old self can read the whole thing with ease, 

“I guess so. It’s an adult who takes care of you.” Sana explains to the girl. The girl hums to herself and furrows her brows,

“Does that mean y/n can come?”

“Of course, she’s your mom isn’t she?” Sana asks, and she’s confused as to why the girl looks up at her in surprise,

“My mom?” 

“Yes… She’s your mom, no?”

“Ms. Minatozaki, Y/n is my aunt.” 

Sana’s whole world stops for a moment. Y/n is her aunt? 

“So your dad and her are…?”

“Y/n is my papa’s younger sister, she always jokes about him being so old,” Hana says, laughing to herself.

Sana genuinely stops functioning as she processes this new information: You’re not taken. Fireworks set off in her heart and confetti seems to pop: you’re not her mom. All the guilt that had been on her shoulders from thinking she was infatuated with a taken mother is gone, and it all makes sense now. Sana wonders how stupid she could’ve been, I mean, you and Hana’s dad had similar features, face shape, hair texture, and color. The young teacher had also realized that Hana only called you by your name, and not “mommy” or “mom” or anything like that; how could she have been so stupid?

“Ms. Minatozaki?”

“Oh, yeah, yes Hana. Y/n can come, of course, she can.” Sana says, and she really hopes you do come. Hana smiles and looks back at her paper before talking to her teacher again,

“You know, my aunt, she asks about you a lot.” 

“She does?” Sana says, her heart skips a beat. Hana nods and looks back up at the teacher,

“She always asks about how school was, but she always ends up asking more about you and how you were during the day.” Sana’s eyes widen and she looks at the young girl in front of her, exposing you for being so interested in her. 

The flame in her heart grows bigger, and it seems that the flame has no intention of dying down now that she knows you’re not Hana’s mother. Hana turns around and makes her way back to her desk to color after seeing that Sana wasn’t capable of responding again, and Sana doesn't even notice. Hana sits down unbothered, not knowing that she just turned Sana’s whole mood around, not knowing that this new piece of information will have her daydreaming the rest of the day – no, the rest of the week – maybe the rest of the month.

-

The school day comes to an end and the usual routine occurs: bell rings, kids scream, talk, and practically leap out of their seats to get in line to go to the entrance of the building. Sana waits with her usual group of eight, which includes Hana, and she hopes that today would be the day that you decided to pick her up. You had already picked Hana up on Monday, but now it’s Wednesday and those are the days that Hana’s dad would usually pick the little girl up, great.

-

Forty minutes pass and Sana sits down at the main office with Hana, no one had come to pick her up yet. Hana seems to be unbothered by this as she colors and draws on the sheet of paper that Sana had given her to cure her boredom, but she worries slightly since Jihyo still waits for her in the front. 

Sana texts Jihyo a string of apologies and explanations and before she reads the instant reply, the sound of heavy breaths are heard as a familiar face enters the room, looking around all worried until her body relaxes when she sees her niece.

Y/n lets out a sigh of relief seeing Hana sitting down, coloring as if there wasn’t a single problem in the world. Her look shifts over to Sana, who is already looking at her. Their eyes meet and it makes the two women smile at one another.

“Hana,” your voice makes the little girl turn her head. She smiles and runs up to hug you, leaving her art on the desk,

“Aunt y/n!” And this is the first time Sana hears the little girl actually call you her aunt, she wishes that she would’ve called you aunt earlier (it would've saved her sleepless nights of wondering what the hell to do with her feelings, but at least she knows now). 

You hug the little girl back and swipe away the strands of hair on her face, “Hi little one. Your dad had something come up at work, I rushed over as soon as my shift ended.” You explain. You turn back to share eye contact with the young teacher, eyes narrowing and lips curving upwards as you smile at her, “Thank you for watching her, I’m sorry for being so late.”

“It’s all right, really.” It’s more than all right, Sana thinks. 

You grin again and turn your attention back to your niece, “Ready to go?”

“Yup!” 

“Okay little one, come on.” and you crouch down to let her wrap around your shoulders, letting her piggyback ride you. You grab the art that your niece had made on the table and finally stand in front of Sana, thanking her.

“I’m sorry again, thank you so much.”

“It’s no problem, it’s nice to see you again,” Sana admits, a bit shyly too. The grin that’s already present on your lips grows and you wave to the shorter woman,

“I’ll see you.” You finally say, waving with your free hand and turning your head to the little one, “Let’s get going, your dad will be back by dinner.” You mutter, and Hana hums tiredly in response before you head out the main office doors, taking a quick glance at Sana, smiling again.

…

Jihyo’s going to lose her mind when I tell her all of this, Sana thinks to herself.

[blacktobackmesa]

how does chronicles of benry tie into gordon streamman, if at all? is it like a joke stream benry does randomly for april fools day or is it actual lore?

It's got lore, but it all hinges on which Chronicles you're talking about: Holly Edition or Scorpy Edition. If you've seen them, you know that they have VERY different tones.

Spoilers for both streams and for existing Streamman works below. Prepare for rambling.

Events from Holly's version have been referenced obliquely in Don't Spell Memory Without Me, and will be discussed further in future stories. Memory establishes that Benrey does not have any pre-game history aside from what others "remember" about him, and being the only one with no past upsets him. At the end of the story, Benrey sets off with Tommy to talk about inventing a backstory, "mentioning something about a dairy farm." Since the Hollowtones Chronicles of Benry stream is established to be a story/movie being told by Holly from Benrey's point of view, I've interpreted the ideas present in it as Benrey's fantasies, or the backstory that he's created for himself. Heck, maybe he's even gone into gmod at some point and fully acted the whole thing. You can play dolls sometimes buddy it's all good

That leads into Scorpy's take on Chronicles, which is rather more... abstract. For the record, I adored watching this stream in real time. Surreal horror that makes you unsure if you should laugh and defies you to find meaning is my jam. That being said, I don't think this stream works as something literal that could just occur in a Streamman story. If I wanted to interpret it as a literal experience Benrey has, it makes a fascinating character study. Perhaps some sort of dream journey or Silent Hill style physical/psychological journey of self-reflection, perhaps due to data fuckery. Maybe even between the game being shut off and being brought into the new program.

However, I'm not currently interested in interpreting it like that. I think the stream is far more interesting when read as a meta-commentary on trying to catch lightning in a bottle for the second time. HLVRAI was such a smash hit, and people are still hounding RTVS for a sequel or a return for the characters. As a creator, that's difficult to handle. The pressure of living up to your own success, of being able to give the people what they want. What if it's not what you want? You might still love your breakout hit deeply, and love the attention it gives you, but will you always be able to feel that way? What are you sacrificing to chase the feeling it gives you? Are you making this sequel because it has worth on its own, or because you want to feel that way again? You can never feel exactly that way again, whether you're the creator or the fan. "How do you know when it's time to let go?"

That's my reading, at least. Yes I took lecture notes during the original screening. I have the heart of an academic, but the constitution of... not an academic.

Anyway, I do think some elements of the stream can worm their way into Streamman, both literal and nonliteral. The theme of recapturing something impossible cuts me very deep, so I like to reuse it, but I also think I can use some of the locations and surreal imagery within the Streamman setting. I haven't brought it up before, but Benrey's house in the home program is a lawless land. He likes to experiment with programming and create his own little domain, the place is much bigger on the inside. One day Gordon could go over to return something that Benrey left at Tommy's and walk inside to find a gmod map full of crucified amonguses.

...man I really dedicated one paragraph to the stream that I'm actually using and then a fuckin' essay to the one I'm not lol

[nctinthehouse]

deja vu

based on “deja vu” by Olivia Rodrigo

reader x ex!Jaehyun

genre: angst, fluff, ex lovers au? idk

wc: 3.1k

AN: I wrote this a while ago but I wasn’t planning on releasing or even write it in the first place however, I just fell in love with the lyrics and song when it came out and I could not pass on writing about it. I guess this is my interpretation of the song? Way too many thoughts at night time lol. I hope you enjoy reading this as much as I did writing it 💕

Do you get deja vu when she's with you?

Running is something you’ve always enjoyed. It’s relaxing, good for your health and helps you clear your mind. Even as a kid, you were always seen running around and giggling. It made you happy.

You’re currently out on a late evening run along the river. This particular area is your favorite place to go to, whether it's for a run, out for a walk or even on the way to work. You like to come here when you need a break from something. The river, the ambience; it made you calm. It’s a special place and means a lot to you. There’s even a cute small store a few minutes away that you discovered when you started coming to this area more often. It’s like a secret place, not a lot of people seem to know about it. Owned by a local lady, she’s so lovely and kind. Her face always lights up whenever you stop by. There’s a lot of memories around here.

It was a really nice day today; clear skies with a few clouds. The sun is starting to set, changing the colors of the sky and clouds with hints of pinks and blues. It kinda reminds you of cotton candy ice cream.

Hmm, you kinda want ice cream now.

You’ve been running for a while now so you decided to jog to the local convenience store and get some ice cream.

As you’re approaching the store, you immediately slow down before stopping completely. You spot someone coming out of the store.

It’s Jaehyun.

His arms around another girl.

You and Jaehyun make brief eye contact with each other. You realise that they’re now walking towards your direction. Snapping out of your thoughts, you lower your head a bit and start walking towards the store trying to avoid having any sort of contact with them. Luckily, you and Jaehyun just walked past each other without acknowledging each other.

But as they were walking towards your direction and walking past, you hear his girlfriend ask him

“Jae, that store is so cute! How did you find it?”

“Oh I was just in this area one day and stumbled upon it. Came here a lot ever since then”

“Well this will definitely be our place from now on, we should come here more often”

That was our place

I found it first

You think to yourself

Stopping again, you turn your head around and spot them smiling and laughing before walking in the store and greeted by the lovely lady there who gave you a huge smile and wave; also waving back at her.

As you’re looking around the store, you think back to the time when you first brought Jaehyun to this area...

“how am i just finding out about this place??” Jaehyun says as you both are currently walking hand in hand along the river

“well now you know” you chuckle

You tell Jaehyun about how you discovered this area as well as the store up ahead when you took a detour on your way back home from class. One of your classes got cancelled which meant you were finished for the day, much earlier than usual. You didn't have anything planned for the rest of the day so you decided to take a different route back to your house.

It wasn't a very busy place which you grew to love. It was perfect for someone who needed a quieter place to think and relax, away from the crowded pavements and honking cars; a place where you could de-stress

“oh Jae, here's the store, come on!”

You quickly pull Jaehyun towards the store excitedly

As you guys go into the store, you spot the lovely owner. You let out a huge grin and wave as you go up to the counter where she is

“oh, Y/N!! so nice to see you again!”

“oh! and who’s this fine young gentleman?” the lady raises her eyebrows

“this is Jaehyun, my boyfriend” chuckling and gesturing your hand towards him

The lady puts her hands on her chest and looks at you guys adoringly

“oh you guys are such a cute couple! Y/N you want an ice cream?”

“yes please!” nodding your head

“Jae you have got to try the ice cream here! the strawberry flavor is a bonus”

“why am i not surprised that it's strawberry flavored” Jaehyun chuckles

After browsing around, you go up to the counter where you’re once again greeted by the lovely lady

“hi sweetie! the usual today?”

You nod your head and chuckle “yeah, thanks”

Looking down at the counter, you look like you’re miles away. The lady notices and frowns a bit

“sweetie, you alright?”

You look up and give her a small smile

“yeah, i’m alright”

As you see your ice cream is ready, you take your card out of your pocket getting ready to pay. However, the lady gently pushes your hand away

“it’s on the house”

You look at her with wide eyes

“oh, no i-”

“i insist” giving you a smile and holding onto your hand

“thank you. i promise to pay you back next time!”

The lady waves her hand around

“oh sweetie don't worry about it! just think of it as a thank you for always dropping by my store”

“thank you again” letting out a small laugh

“take care of yourself ok? i’ll see you around”

“i will” giving the lady a smile and a wave bye before going out of the store

❀❀❀

As you take a seat at a nearby picnic bench and start eating your ice cream, you see that Jaehyun and his girlfriend are still around. Your eyes can't help but wander towards them hanging around by a car. His car. The same car Jaehyun would drive you around in especially during night time. You see them playing around and her feeding him ice cream. You start to notice small things about her such as the clothes she's wearing; she kinda reminds you of herself. Looks like she’s wearing that jacket too. Just like I did.

Is it jealousy?

Maybe...

But more like pity.

So when you gonna tell her that we did that, too?

She thinks its special, but it's all reused

❀❀❀

Moments later, you see them get into the car and drive away. All these thoughts suddenly start clouding your mind and you can't help but wonder

How fast did he move on?

Did he even move on in the first place?

You’re not just trying to replace me, right?

I wonder, how many more things we did together, you do with her too?

You began to reminisce on some of the things you and Jaehyun did when you were still together…

Do you get deja vu when she's with you?

Remember when we used to go on road trips to Malibu?

Music, ice cream and Jaehyun.

Those were the 3 things you loved and needed the most whenever you went on road trips. Heck you could probably throw out the music and ice cream and just have Jaehyun as company only.

Those road trips were often unplanned. Sometimes you and Jaehyun would go without thinking about where you guys would specifically go or what you guys would do there.

There was a particular time which was the most special. It was the first road trip you and Jaehyun went on after you guys made it official. Actually, it was also the first date you guys went on as a couple.

You remember back in high school when Jaehyun would tell you about the times he and his family would go on road trips to Malibu during school breaks for some family bonding time. You hadn’t been to Malibu before so you were very excited when Jaehyun decided on taking you on a road trip there, especially as a first date since you guys had not been on one yet.

Jaehyun drove up to your house and honked his car, letting you know that he’s arrived to pick you up. You run downstairs and look through the curtains and see Jaehyun getting out of the car. You quickly grab your stuff and head out of your house.

You jog up to him, both of you embracing each other in a tight hug. As you let go, you spot the jacket he currently has on

“wow i love your jacket! is it new?”

“oh this? nah, i bought this a while ago from some vintage store”

“can i try it on? i love vintage stuff” your face lighting up

Jaehyun smirks a little as he takes off your jacket with you taking yours off too. He hands you his jacket and holds onto yours as you put his one on.

You let out a gasp

“thanks, this is mine now” you grin at Jaehyun widely before jumping into the passenger seat of his car

Jaehyun looks blankly at you briefly

“baby what am i gonna wear then?”

“you don’t need to though, it's not even that cold right now” you say as you place your arms on the edge of the car windows

“but what if it gets a bit chilly later on?”

“just wear mines” pointing to your jacket that he’s currently holding

“this? you think this would fit me?”

“what? you won’t know unless you try it on” shrugging your shoulders

Jaehyun reluctantly puts on your jacket. He struggles a bit with the sleeves but he manages to get it on. You start laughing as you see how small your jacket looks on him

“kinda suits you though” you laugh

“shut up” Jaehyun says jokingly as he whacks your arms

You fake a loud gasp as you place both of your hands on your chest, not breaking eye contact with him as he gets into the driver's seat

“Y/N you know i’m only joking” Jaehyun chuckles as you glare at him with a unimpressed face

You look away from him and roll your eyes

“baby come ooonnnn i’m sorry i was only jo-”

“just drive” you say with a monotone voice

Jaehyun looks at you for a moment, noticing you biting your lips. He realised sometime ago that it’s something that you usually do to stop yourself from smiling or break out into laughter.

He takes your hand in his and gives it several kisses. Seeing you breaking out a small smile, he smiles to himself before starting the car and driving.

❀❀❀

When you finally got there, Jaehyun happily took you to some of his favorite places he loved to visit.  Hours went by quickly and you guys were hungry so Jaehyun decided to take you to a park and have a picnic. It was nice out too so why not.

You guys bought some food from a nearby cafe and set up a picnic spot that had a lovely view of the ocean. There was also a hiking trail in the area and you guys decided on doing that after some lunch.

After lunch, Jaehyun went and got both of you ice cream from an ice cream truck that was parked nearby

“you know what?” you say as you scoop out a another bite of the ice cream

“what?”

“i think i’m gonna make it a goal to try as many different strawberry ice creams i can whenever i visit a new place”

“sounds good baby”

As you look out towards the ocean, Jaehyun takes the opportunity to give you a small kiss on the side of your lips which surprises you. You jump a bit and stare at him with wide eyes

“sorry, you just had a bit of ice cream there” Jaehyun smirks

“oh”

You’re quiet for a few seconds before saying

“is it all gone…?”

Jaehyun leans in closer and closer; he rubs his nose against yours lightly

“almost” he whispers against your lips before locking in with yours

Your first kiss. Oh how sweet it was.

Do you get deja vu?

♡♡♡

Remember when you used to come over to my house?

If you weren't hanging out at Jaehyun’s, he’s usually at yours.

You and Jaehyun would stay over at each other's house every weekend. You guys often had days where you just didn't want to do anything special. Just chilling at home such as eating, sleeping and enjoying each other's company. When Jaehyun is over at yours, one of the things you guys like to do is to sit on the couch and binge watch your favorite TV shows. Today is one of those days.

You guys are currently sitting next to each other, crossed legged on the couch at your house; a bowl of popcorn on your lap while the channel you’re currently watching is doing reruns of one of your favorite shows, Glee. This wasn't exactly one of Jaehyun’s favorite shows. He didn't hate it but he wasn't a huge fan of it like you were. He doesn't mind watching it over and over with you as long as he’s spending time with you.

Grabbing some popcorn pieces, you look at Jaehyun

“Jae open up”

Jaehyun looks confused but opens his mouth anyway

You throw a couple of popcorn pieces, trying to aim it in his mouth but failing; the popcorn always hitting his face. You try a few more times before Jaehyun lets out a complaint

“babe come on!! your aiming skills are awful”

“hey it’s not my fault your mouth ain’t big enough”

Letting out a shocked laugh, Jaehyun grabs some popcorn and throws it at you. You guys end up having a mini popcorn fight before stopping as you realise you got popcorn on the couch and the floor. You guys weren't bothered to do a lot of cleaning today.

A while later, your face lights up as one of your favorite songs on Glee has come on. You grab Jaehyun’s arm and start moving it around, you were too excited.

Moments later, you grab the remote and get up from the couch. You pretend the remote is your mic and you start singing along to the song, belting out some words slightly out of tune

“WORKIN’ HARD TO GET MY FILL”

“EVERYBODY WANTS A THRILL”

Suddenly, you point the remote down towards Jaehyun, wanting him to sing the next bit. He hesitates for a second but joins in anyway, with you singing along

“PAYIN’ ANYTHING TO ROLL THE DICE”

“JUST ONE MORE TIME”

Jaehyun thinks you look ridiculous but looks at you in admiration; a huge smile on his face.

Still singing out of tune slightly, Jaehyun sits and watches you as you're dancing around. He shakes his head and throws his head back laughing. He wipes some of his tears away from laughing so much.

“DON’T STOP BELIEVIN’”

“HOLD ON TO THAT FEELING”

You whip your head towards him, slightly taken aback as Jaehyun suddenly gets up and takes the remote from you and starts belting out the lyrics

“STREET LIGHT PEOPLE”

You let out a laugh as you both dance around singing the rest of the song out of tune but somehow in harmony.

Do you get deja vu?

♡♡♡

Remember the first time you told me you loved me?

Being a music major, you spent a lot of time in a music room, especially in front of a piano. Growing up, you’ve always wanted to be a pianist. You remember the time when you were a kid and saw someone sitting in front of a piano playing a song at a train station. You looked at them with wide eyes and was so mesmerized by the upbeat melody. Letting go of your mum’s hand, you ran up to them and watched them play. You found out from the nice stranger that they were playing a song called “Uptown Girl’ by Billy Joel. It was at that moment you realized what you wanted to be when you grew up.

Ever since then, that tune has stuck with you. When you first got your very own piano, you spent a lot of time trying to figure out how to play it as well as listening to the song many times. Whenever you played it, it brought back all those memories. It meant a lot to you.

You were finished with lectures earlier than expected so you decided to head to the music room to work on a few things.

Whilst sat in front of the piano wanting to work on an upcoming assessment, your mind drifted elsewhere and you started playing Uptown Girl.

You were so focused on playing that you didn't hear Jaehyun coming into the room

“whatcha playing babe?”

You slightly jump at his voice before turning around

“what you doing here? i thought you were in class”

Jaehyun took off his backpack and sat next to you as you scooted to the side a bit to make space for him before he set his bag down beside the piano bench

“class got cancelled so i’m free the rest of the day woooo”

You chuckle at his response and nod

“soo… whatcha you playing babe?”

You told Jaehyun the story about how you came across the song and how your love for music came about when you were a kid.

You and Jaehyun met during high school and eventually bonded over music and grew closer throughout the years. Now here you both are, attending the same university as music majors.

“can you teach me?”

“i can try”

You played the song a few times so Jaehyun could listen to it and get the vibe of it before teaching him the basics then the harder bits.

“i think that's enough learning for now”

“okay” you giggle

Jaehyun asked if you could play him the whole song and you happily obliged. While you were playing, Jaehyun looked at you and was fascinated. You had a huge smile on your face and thought you were the most precious person ever. He wanted to love and protect you by all means.

You were about to go onto the next part when suddenly you hear

“i love you”

As soon as you hear those words, your hands come to a halt. You stare at your hands for a moment before looking at Jaehyun in shock, mouth slightly ajar

“i love you, Y/N”

Do you get deja vu?

A different girl now, but there's nothing new

Shaking your thoughts away, you roll your eyes and scoff before getting up and throwing the now empty ice cream cup away. You decided to head home and enjoy the rest of your evening by watching reruns of Glee with some more strawberry ice cream.

I know you get deja vu.

AN: Thanks for reading until the end! My longest fic I’ve written so far and I’m pretty happy with it. As always I’m happy to get any feedback on it and I really hope you enjoyed reading this. I’m currently working on another fic that’s based on a song I’ve been loving lately so I hope to get that one up sometime! Take care everyone 💜

masterlist

[galadhremmin]

your ability to stomach trump quotations so you can have fun with them is impressive but there are a lot of us who had a traumatic 4 years directly because of his rhetoric, and just want to move on now, so maybe that’s why trump generally isn’t associated with fandom fun

you're not required to find everything I post funny of course. that's to be expected! I'm mainly entertaining myself here. I do think the fandom is missing out by not applying reduce reuse recycle (as Dark Lord quotes) to a certain former usa president. Shit, at least, can be used to grow flowers.

Sort of relatedly-- judging by someone else's 'this is the first time i've been repulsed by sauron' reply as well, it's much easier to empathise with (and often uwufy lbh) a character like Sauron if one doesn't quite connect his repulsive qualities and actions with currently living deeply awful people.

Maybe due to the fairytale elements it becomes, I suppose, too emotionally abstract to be truly repulsive? He is supposed to be terrifying and repulsive though. His domain is torment etc. He's arrogant to the point of stupidity. He's a fictional tyrant who enjoys complete control over others, inflicts pain, pollutes the environment, enslaves people.

Personally I dunno. Though it was obviously a joke it does sort of fit into the way I prefer engaging with Tolkien, which might just not always be yours. I make very stupid jokes. I also think finding ways to make his fiction less emotionally abstract to me and giving some thought to what he wrote about the corrupting power of power etc. + thinking about how I (dis)agree are worth doing.

Tolkien gains meaning both by looking at his own ideological influences and thinking about the real life events and people who inspired his writing + linking to current irl things that have more direct emotional impact. I'm more interested in that than, say, sexy sauron content myself.

One of my dream AU fics is an entirely historically accurate one in which Sauron rises again during the industrial revolution as a pro-child labour owner of multiple factories who expands his grasp over global politics through investments while he unsuccesfully tries to regain some of his former supernatural power through the local deeply disapppointing Occultist scene (making fun of Aleister Crowley while at the same time making Sauron a capitalist who, of course, supports the monarchy, at least in name... 😌). I would love to make Tolkien's local embodiment of evil fight unions/socialists/anarchists/etc. with conservative support and generally make the man spin in his grave in a deeply informed way. The few surviving Elves are connected to the Arts and Crafts movement and-- ok shutting up now but you get my point I think. This is very niche and a very specific way of engaging with the material that would probably only appeal to me. Also it would take so much effort to write oh my god.

But yes my posts sometimes aren't going to appeal to you because they're made for someone else entirely (me).

[sery-chan-13]

[Deja Vu]

Arisu Ryohei × Reader

Is it angst? Kind of, but not really. I heard this song, and this was the first thought that came to mind. So... yeah-

Warnings: swearing, needles, blood, does anger need one? Because there's a lot of that here, alcohol, implied sexual content, but it's not explicit? Like... it's implied what happened, but I didn't write it, you know?

It was a harsh breakup, you'd say. Of course you'd say that, you were the one who's heart got broken. Arisu had met Usagi, and you could feel him drifting away. So, when you broke up, you expected it, but it still hurt.

And now, you watched them across the pool while they sat eating strawberry ice cream together. You smiled sadly. You two used to do that. She was wearing his jacket, and it hurt you. You used to wear that exact same one.  You felt someone sit besides you. "Watching them again, huh?" They said. "Yep. Is it weird?" You asked.  You looked besides you seeing him look up with a questioning look. "Yes, but no? What do you want me to say?'' He joked. You shoved his shoulder. "You're so mean Niragi. I'll push you into the pool!" you pouted, ending in a laugh. He chuckled, "Yeah yeah. Let's go, that isn't good for you."

"So when's he gonna tell her?" You asked, laying on his bed. "Tell her what?" Niragi asked. "That we did that too... She thinks it's special, but it's all reused," you responded. You could hear him sigh. "Look, I want to be nice, because I- we're... acquaintances... or whatever you want to call us. So, here's how you're going to get over him."

You laughed, taking another sip of the beer bottle. There were bottles littered around the room, and the blasting music from the party could be heard in his room. The vibrations from the bass could be felt, making you sigh. "Ok, I'm ready!" You shouted eagerly. "I don't even know why the hell you grabbed these in our last supply run," he laughed, holding the small package. You shrugged, "Thought I'd get the courage to do it." You two were very much drunk, and you were about to do mental breakdown things(TM). "Just do it before I regret my decision!" You scolded, with a playful glare. He laughed, "Ok ok, stick out your tongue, I think you've had the ice in there long enough." You did as he told you. He held your tongue still with his fingers, and he grabbed a needle with his other hand, looking at you to make sure. You tried not to laugh, and nodded. He stuck the needle through quickly. The metallic taste of blood filled your mouth, but somehow no pain. Maybe it was because you numbed it with ice, or the fact that your broken heart hurt more. You waited for him to stick the piercing through, and take his hands away from your mouth. "And we are done!" He shouted with a laugh, wiping off the blood that had gotten on his hands. You stumbled off the bed, sticking out your tongue in the mirror. "Oh I'm fucking hot," you said. You could heat him laugh. Blood dripped from your mouth onto the drawers beneath. He didn't seem to care about the mess. "Am I supposed to bleed that much?" You asked. He shrugged. You turned with a mildly shocked expression, and hit him. You both started laughing. "I'm going to regret this aren't I?" You asked. "It's better than cutting your hair, trust me. Best impulse mental breakdown things I've ever done are tattoos and piercings," he responded. You laughed, rolling your eyes. "What else should we do?"

"Alright, now, just scream into the open," he instructed. "Won't anyone hear?" You asked. You two had somehow managed to stumbled up the stairs, and were now on the roof. A danger hazard, seeing as you two almost didn't make it up the stairs. But in that moment, neither of you cared. "Eh, they're to drunk to care," he said. You nodded, before adding, "But you're doing it with me." "No, I'm just going to let you have all the fun- duh, I'm going to do it," he said. You took a deep breath, getting your anger and pent up rage towards Arisu and Usagi.

"I HATE TO THINK THAT I WAS JUST HIS TYPE!"

"THE GIRL I LIKE IS STUCK ON A DUMBASS BOY WHO DOESN'T DESERVE HER!"

"HE DOES ALL THE THINGS WE USED TO DO WITH HER!"

"I WISH I DIDN'T HAVE CHISHIYA TO BOTHER ME EVERYDAY!"

This was therapeutic to both of you. He didn't want to reveal how he was really feeling, but alcohol does something to people. So, if he said something a bit personal, hopefully you wouldn't remember. Hopefully you were to drunk to remember. And although he knows he'll remember because he's not as drunk as you, he hopes he doesn't remember either. Just so he doesn't hate himself for saying something.

"SHE'S BASICALLY ME AND IT MAKES ME ANGRY BECAUSE ALL THAT SETS US APART IS HER LOOKS! SHE'S EVERYTHING I WISH I LOOKED LIKE AND ARISU FUCKING KNOWS THAT!"

"I HATE THAT NO ONE HATES ME MORE THAN I HATE MYSELF!"

"I HATE THAT HE TOLD ME I DIDN'T HAVE TO WORRY ABOUT HER! I WAS SO FUCKING RIGHT TO BE INSECURE WHEN SHE'S EVERYTHING I WISH I WERE!"

"I'M MAD AT THE FACT CHISHIYA SAW ME FALL INTO THE POOL AND NOW USES IT AS LEVERAGE!" (trying to make you laugh? Kinda. Trying to make myself laugh? Definitely.)

"THE SONGS WE USED TO LISTEN TO REMIND ME OF HIM AND IT HURTS TO NOT BE ABLE TO LISTEN TO MY FAVORITE FUCKING SONG!"

"I HATE BEING ALONE!"

"I HATE THAT I'M STILL IN LOVE WITH ARISU!! HE'S MOVED ON BUT I STILL FUCKING HAVEN'T!"

"I'M PRETTY PISSED OFF ABOUT THAT TOO, ACTUALLY!"

"I FUCKING HATE HIM! I FUCKING HATE HER! AND I FUCKING HATE THAT I'M JEALOUS OF WHAT THEY HAVE, BECAUSE IT'S ALL EXACTLY THE SAME AS WHEN ARISU AND I WERE TOGETHER!"

"THE FACT (Y/N) DOESN'T KNOW SHE DESERVES BETTER THAN THAT PIECE OF SHIT PISSES ME THE FUCK OFF!"

"THE FACT NIRAGI SAYS HE DOESN'T HAVE ANY GODDAMN FRIENDS ANNOYS ME BECAUSE I'M RIGHT FUCKING HERE!"

"THE FACT (Y/N) IS OBLIVIOUS TO EVERYONE'S FEELINGS FOR HER IS ANNOYING AS HELL!"

"THE FACT NIRAGI THINKS PLAYING THE TOUGH GUY SCARES ME MAKES ME WORRY ABOUT HIS MENTAL HEALTH!"

"I WISH SOMEONE WOULD HIT ME THE WAY THEY DID IN HIGHSCHOOL SO I COULD FORGET ABOUT MY FEELINGS FOR THIS GIRL!"

"I WISH NIRAGI DIDN'T KEEP ANY SECRETS FROM ME SEEING I'M HIS BEST FRIEND!"

"I WISH (Y/N) WOULD ACKNOWLEDGE OR AT LEAST NOTICE THE FACT THAT I'VE LIKED HER FOR- FUCKING- EVER!"

You panted from screaming so much, and looked at him shocked. "Shit, I didn't meant to-" he started. Maybe it was the alcohol, the sadness you felt, but you pulled him in for a kiss. It was sloppy and all over the place, but in your intoxicated state, it felt like heaven on earth. You could care less about it, because a part of you had always wanted to do this. With Niragi. The feelings for him were always there, you just felt stronger ones for Arisu. And over the past few days, your feelings had grown. Maybe it was the fact that he was the one helping you through the breakup. He was there, and he seemed to care. And moreover, Arisu wasn't a thought in your mind in this moment. The hurt had gone away in that minute. Would you regret this in the morning? Maybe, maybe not.

You woke up due to the throbbing headache you had. You grabbed your head, sitting up. The blankets fell of your body, and you looked down. "Oh fuck... what happened last night?" You questioned, seeing as your clothes were nowhere to be found. You looked besides you, seeing Niragi on the other side of the bed. Your jaw dropped. "I- ma'am, did I-? Oh no. Oh nonononono, what the fuck-" you panicked. Not because you didn't like him, but more because you were drunk, he was your friend, and you were trying to get over a breakup. Which, in drunk (Y/N)'s defense, you did seem pretty over it when you were with Niragi.  You heard a groan, and looked besides you. "Good... morning?" He muttered sleepily. 'Hot-' 'Shut up you horny bitch' You ran your hands through your hair. "I- what did we do?" You asked, even though it was obvious, and the fact that you could remember certain events from last night made you blush. "Well, first you were watching those two being couple-y, then we got drunk, you more than me though, you pierced your tongue, we screamed off the roof, and things escalated from a kiss, and now we're here," he explained. How the hell did he remember so much? Wasn't he just as drunk as you? "And before you ask, I may get drunk, but my memory will not falter. I've tried. Doesn't work," he said. Could he read your mind? You sighed, falling back. He looked away, trying to sort out his own feelings. A part of him was happy, seeing the hickeys and marks over your body. He had wanted to do that forever. Another part felt regret because you two were drunk. It didn't matter what had happened, neither of you were in the right state of mind. He knew whatever had happened was merely the alcohol messing with your brains, and the hurt from your broken heart. It wasn't real feeling. And the last part was sad. Although, it was a small part of him, it was there. Sad because you would most likely want to not talk to him. Or, at least that was the worst case scenario in his mind.

"Do you... do you regret it? Be honest," you said. Your voice was so quiet, he could've missed it.  He looked down at you, seeing you stare blankly up at the ceiling. He scoffed. "Hell no. And I don't care if you do, because I don't. I won't either. I've wanted to do that for so long, but you were with him," Niragi answer bitterly. You looked over, surprised. "You don't regret it?" You asked again. He shook his head. You sat up, crawling on the bed over to his side. "I don't... I don't know how to feel. I remember... its and bits of it... I just don't want you to think I did it to get over Arisu," you explained. "I wouldn't think that. See, the thing about alcohol is it can make people act how they want to act and see what they want to see. And the fact you were screaming my name and not his even as drunk as we were tells me something," he said, a teasing tone so very present. . You could hear the smirk in his voice. You blushed, and leaned your head on his shoulder. Had you really? "Then... what are we?" You asked. "Ah, the age old question. This is cliche, no?" He joked. You hit him softly muttering, "Take this seriously please." He sighed, shaking his head. "I don't know. Friends with benefits, fuck buddies. Whatever you want," he said. You pulled away with a smirk. "See, you left out 'a committed relationship'. That means you don't want that," you pointed out. He scoffed, fake hurt written on his face. "I just didn't know if that was too much for you. But I'd enjoy it."

You finally felt... complete. For the first time after the breakup, you didn't look to see where they were to avoid them. You didn't feel jealous or sad over the fact that they were talking about what used to be your song. Because now, it wasn't your guy's song. It was theirs. And that was OK now. Because you could see the hurt that his eyes held when Niragi's arm was around your waist. The shock on his face when you talked to them, and his eyes moved over the hickeys and marks littering your skin.

Slowly over the next few weeks, you heard Arisu accidently call Usagi your name, the same way he'd called you her name. It made you laugh. Because now, you were happy, and he was the one in pain. He was the one who would regret everything. Not you.

"(Y/N), can we talk?" Arisu asked. You pouted, but got off of Niragi's lap. He pecked your lips, glaring at Arisu. You could hear Arisu gulp, and you snickered. You two walked away.

"What did you want to talk about?" You asked. "I-... I'm sorry for how I ended things," he apologized. You nodded with a smile. "I accept your apology," you said. You could feel where this conversation was going, and it made you giddy with excitement. "I miss you, you know. I wish I hadn't done that, I was stupid," he said. You smirked. Exactly what you thought he'd say. "Look, I wish you and Usagi the best. I've moved on. I'm finally happy without you, and it's the best feeling in the world. You breaking up with me hurt so much at first, I thought I was going to die. But it ended up being the best gift you ever gave me. You do all the things you used to do with me with her. And I hope it gives you deja vu, so you can remember that I'm better. Sure, she's amazing, but she's basically me. I'm finally feeling confident, and not like I have to compete with another girl who's everything I want to be. Around him, I don't have to act like someone else because I want to make him happy. I act like me, and he actually likes the real me. I always told you to not worry about him because we were just best friends, but now that I'm here... you really were right to worry about him. I was always the better choice, and I'm glad you're realizing it when I don't need you to anymore. I'm with Niragi now, and I'm sure he's waiting, so... goodbye. Good luck with Usagi though, Arisu. Treat her well, and... as I said earlier, I hope you get deja vu when you see her and you're doing the things we used to do."

I still can't write angst for shit, oh my gods-

[knjoodles]

learn to love; jungkook | 03

pairing: teacher!jungkook x singleparent!reader

genre: angst, fluff

word count: 3.8k

summary: raising your daughter alone while simultaneously watching your ex-husband live the life of his dreams away from the two of you hurts. badly. it hurts a little less, though, when you find an unlikely friend while looking for help.

lowercase intended 

01 | 02 | 04

   after dropping seyoung to her school, you sat in your car contemplating what had just happened, running your hands over the leather of your wheel. you thought it was inappropriate to be this interested in your daughter’s teacher. he was objectively handsome, his striking eyebrows and gentle dimples key features of his face. his body, well, he was lean and fit, standing taller than you with toned arms and legs. it was obvious he took care of himself very well and, from how organized the classroom was, that he was very attentive in nearly every aspect of his life. maybe it wasn’t necessarily the things you saw on the surface but what you learned from his habits that drew you to him.

  it wasn’t as if you were head over heels in love with this man. you knew what that felt like with hoseok, and this feeling? it wasn’t that. but, that didn’t stop you from giggling like a little girl in excitement over the image of his heaven-perfected facial features flashing in your mind. 

  thankful that some of your team members, like you, are also parents, you were relieved when they assured you it was alright that you’d arrive later to drop off your daughter. pulling up to the front of bighit’s shockingly large headquarters, you left your car, adjusting the bag hanging off your shoulder as you stepped in.

  your friendly coworkers greeted you kindly, waving and beaming at you. though you weren’t very social, your name flew around quite often in the workplace. your huge achievements and resilient aura while simultaneously being a single mother are what made you so popular without you even trying. your coworkers admired just how much shit you persisted through to get where you are today. you’re a tough lady, and you’re proud that it’s well known. “(y/n!)” a familiar voice sung, making you turn your head. you found a frantically waving sooyoung in front of you, dangling out of a conference room. “bang pd’s having an exec. meeting in our usual room. guess what? we have a new album to produce!” she danced as you approached her, visibly excited at this news. park sooyoung, your partner in crime. 

  even though she was two years your junior, sooyoung had been with you through almost everything. anything that currently affected you, sooyoung knew about. the two of you were joint at the hip during college, as the two of you shared the idea of naïve students to join a sorority. once you both realized how shitty it could be, you broke the ‘girl pact’ and left, renting an apartment together. from bonding over how much you hated the attitude of an idol to laughing over soju and ramen, you’d never give up a second you spent with her. she was the only constant in your entire life at this point, the only independent variable. your relationship with her never faltered, it only grew and grew so much that it’s as if your love for her is essentially etched into your heart. she’d helped you plan the wedding, plan for seyoung, file for divorce. she was your shoulder to cry on, your great escape. you could find no one quite like her who’d help you like she did. her broad, welcoming smile and simple beauty was a refresher from the caked makeup of idols wandering the hallways, just as unhappy with their look as your eyes were from having to see it. “sooyoung!” you waved back, following her inside the conference room and shutting the door behind you. sitting down at the desk labeled yours, you sat at the head seat, projector clicking on behind you. your team members surrounded you: sooyoung, yunho, euijin, namjoon, and jinah.

   “alright, cap’n!” yunho exclaimed, twisting on his swivel chair, fingers drumming his laptop’s keyboard. “what’s the plan? we’ve got a couple of unused demos from clc’s old albums we can freshen up and reuse for loona’s comeback! may i?” he suggested. at your nod of approval, he screen-shared his laptop screen to the projector, important tabs being dragged into view. 

   “great.” you smiled, pulling your laptop from its case. “yunho, leave those up there. those are all the tracks we have for the album, correct? first, i’d like to thank all of you for bringing together your top demos. after listening to your tracks, i know for a fact that we all took bang pd’s enthusiasm for the transferred girl group very seriously, and i appreciate that. second, i have made the final cuts after consulting your votes, and we’ve concluded that so what, hash, number one, oh yes i am, ding ding dong and three six five will remain on the album. one of every one of our songs has made it onto the album. congratulations! now, about logistics,” you started, your excitement for an upcoming album clouding all other thoughts. when you went to work, surprisingly enough, it felt as if you were on vacation, as if you were doing something right again. passion pumped through your veins once more, captivating the rest of your team. it was go time. 

   “fuck, you did it again, (y/n). great work.” namjoon sighed, shaking your hand as he rose from his seat. “i can’t believe we got this much done in such a small amount of time. i could’ve gone way longer, it’s a shame we had to cut it short.”

   “i know!” jinah chimed in agreement, gathering her things. “i couldn’t handle a second of what you do every day, (y/n). you’re amazing.”

   “no, you can,” you denied, correcting the both of them. “if you’re on this board of what, six people? it means you’re one of the most hardworking, competent, and passionate producers bighit has ever hired, to the point where you’re one of the heads of operations. you could all handle what i do, that’s mainly why i chose you to lead your respective sectors.” you chuckled, pulling your bag onto your shoulder. “and, i wish we could go longer, too. i have a parent meeting with my daughter’s teacher, so that’s the reason why you’ll all be sleeping early tonight.” you joked, earning a hearty laugh from your colleagues. you waved goodbye to each of your teammates, wishing them a good night and a safe drive the way you always did. this left you and sooyoung, babbling just like you did when you were younger. 

   “hey, you going anywhere tonight?” sooyoung asked, heels clicking on the marble floors.

   “i mean, i have the meeting with seyoung’s teacher. did you forget already?” you chuckled, poking fun at her. “but no, i don’t have anywhere to go after that. what, did you want to come with me?” you raised an eyebrow and watched sooyoung’s face relax, obviously thankful that you brought it up instead of her.

   “oh my god, yes,” she groaned, smiling. “my car’s being repaired and i don’t want to take an uber home. me, you, and seyoung can have a mommy-daughter-auntie night! please?” she gripped your hand, tugging it like a child. 

   “fine!” you laughed, pulling your hand away. “it would be good for seyoung to have someone while she waits for me to finish with her teacher. even though it’s fifteen minutes, she can get pretty bored and or antsy when she doesn’t have something to entertain herself with,” you thought aloud, knowing that because seyoung’s growing up, she’s more excitable and more curious about things. you silently thanked sooyoung from sparing you all the dramatic nightmares of a mother when she knows her child has to sit alone, without her. you invited sooyoung into the front seat of your car, her long legs slithering into place. 

   “have you met him already? my sister works at yooseong, she told me jungkook is new,” sooyoung explained, suddenly very invested in seyoung’s new teacher.

   “well, i did meet him earlier today, but,” you paused, face contorting to a confused frown. “how the hell did you know he was teaching seyoung?” your eyes widened, your lips forming an astonished smile. “sooyoung!”

   “i might’ve pulled some strings,” she raised her hands in defeat. “it’s just because i was curious about seyoung! my sister knows how close we are and how much i love seyoung, i practically begged her to tell me!” sooyoung confessed, voice rising practically three octaves. “but, seriously, how is he? is he a nice guy? he better be a nice guy,” sooyoung warned, fists balling. you loved how her personality towards friends contrasted heavily from the woman in the workplace. sooyoung working had an aura so intimidating and sharp she could cut, but sooyoung chatting had the aura of a big cuddle bear. 

   “he’s, well,” you started, trying to gather your words. you couldn’t say much about him, the two of you only had a two-minute conversation. “i don’t know a lot about him because, as i mentioned, we met this morning, but, sooyoung, do you know what he looks like?”

   “no, i don’t.” she shrugged. “soojung only gave me his name. what, is he scary? does he not look like he’s supposed to be there?” sooyoung pandered you with questions, her eyes and tone full of concern.

   “no, no!” you replied, shaking your free hand. “he looks fine. i just, well, i don’t know how to explain it. do you remember when we met hoseok at that party a long, long time ago?” you asked, earning a slow nod from her. “he reminds me of that hoseok. a bubbly, kind, caring, hoseok.” you paused and listened to the silence in the car, the traffic outside being the only thing preventing this conversation from being more awkward. “i... i don’t know,” you sighed, laughing at your strange thoughts. “i don’t even understand how that works! i met him for two fucking minutes and in those two minutes he managed to remind me of the one man i loved with all my heart?” you breathed heavily, recollecting yourself.

   “hey, woah,” sooyoung cautioned, rubbing a hand your back. “don’t make this teacher that personal for you. he’s not hoseok, he’s someone else, and if you keep associating him with that scum on earth you won’t ever have a good relationship with him. remember seyoung needs this, and so do you. seyoung first, and then you.” sooyoung’s hard-knock advice never failed to be your reality check. she’d always remind you of what was important so you wouldn’t get so caught up in your emotions. “i suggest you talk to him and get to know him, so you can see just how different he is from hoseok. i mean, if i had any kids, i wouldn’t let them near hoseok. he’d probably lock ‘em in a closet and sleep with his girlfriend for the thirtieth time in a row.” she rolled her eyes, slapping the dash of your car in anger. “i hate that guy. i know you don’t want me to hate him, but i do. i capital h, a, t, e him. hate.” she complained, folding her arms. 

   “no, i get it. if he wasn’t the father of my child, i’d hate him too.” you pulled into the driveway of the school, seeing students waddle off with their parents as the school day came to a close. you led sooyoung to seyoung’s third-grade classroom, the door now decorated with adorable mini paper handprints of each student, their name written in the center. in the lower right corner, you could see jungkook’s large handprint with ‘mr. jeon’ scribbled on it about twenty-six times, one for each student to write his name. you chuckled at how cute it was and opened the door, the room buzzing with excitement as parents came to collect their child. 

   “ah, ms. (y/n)!” jungkook’s head rose from the pile of homework on his desk to greet you. he stepped out of his chair and walked towards you and sooyoung, twisting his body to avoid the high-energy children. 

   “he knows your first name?!” sooyoung whisper-ashouted, awe-strucken.

   “i almost told him my last name was jung! i wasn’t thinking, i just said the first thing that came to mind!” you whispered back, panicking that you were having this conversation as he made his way to you.

   “you couldn’t remember your last name?” sooyoung retorted, utterly confused. “jesus, (y/n), seriously?”

   “yes, seriously,” you responded as jungkook finally reached the two of you. “it’s nice to see you again, mr. jeon.” you shook his hand politely, smiling. 

   “it’s nice to see you, too!” he turns to sooyoung, squinting slightly. “i don’t believe we’ve met, but you look so familiar —“

   “i’m soojung’s sister, sooyoung.” she smiled, waving. 

   “the famous soojung is your sister? of course!” he returned her friendly gaze, nodding. as you all chatted nicely a teacher entered the room, telling all children who haven’t been picked up yet to head to the cafeteria for extended care. “it’s nice to meet you. i do have a meeting with (y/n) at the moment, so may we please be excused?” jungkook, asked, adjusting his shirt. 

   “yeah, sooyoung, can you get seyoung? she hasn’t noticed we’re here yet,” you laughed, watching your daughter march happily out of the classroom. “seyoung!” you called. her head spun and her eyes widened when she caught sight of you, but her mouth twisted into an excited grin at the sight of sooyoung. 

   “sooyoung auntie!” seyoung exclaimed, running to give her a huge hug. 

   “hi, baby!” sooyoung pat her head affectionately, taking her hand. “i’ll take care of her. you guys get going!”

  and so, after all the students had left, you sat down in front of jungkook’s desk as he tidied it up, moving large stacks of paper behind him. “i’m sorry i couldn’t have cleaned earlier,” he sighed, filing through cabinets and stuffing papers inside. “when you’re in charge of twenty-six kids at once, things don’t always end up getting done very quickly.” he joked, sitting at his desk. 

   “oh, tell me about it,” you replied, laughing. “seyoung’s quite a handful at home; she’s full of beans!” you pulled out a small notebook from your purse, wanting to make sure you'd jot down everything down from this meeting.

   “i can tell! she’s very excited in class and has shown just how enthusiastic she is about the tangerine points.” he chuckled, motioning to the large counter scribbled on the corner of the whiteboard, dedicated to tangerine points. “but, today, we’re just going to talk logistics, what i should know about your child, what i should know about you, and anything else you see important. i wanted to talk about seyoung first, but, if there’s something you wanted to open with, we can start there?” he asked, opening a desk drawer and pulling out a file labeled ‘seyoung’.

   “oh, no, this meeting is about seyoung, so it’s appropriate we start with her.” you tittered, earning a laugh from the man across from you.

   “you’re funny!” he smiled, opening the file. “well, this is seyoung’s file; it has her records from kindergarten to second grade, her personal information, and any notes other teachers have made regarding her and her performance. i looked over it before our meeting, and may i just say, great job, (y/n). your daughter is amazing, she shines particularly well. she has a lot of potential, and you seem to have unlocked it in her early years! congratulations on that.” he nodded at your smiling face, turning pages of the contents of the file. “i did want to mention that, even though she does very well, seyoung is very talkative in class. not to the point where she disturbs class time, but enough for me to mention it to you. do you understand what i mean?” he asked, motioning towards you.

  you looked up from your notebook, finishing a sentence. “yes, of course.” you nodded. “is there anything you wanted me to do about this, like talk to her at home?”

   “i think that’d be the best move, just telling her that class time is for work, and recess is for play. i told her today that i needed her to listen more in class, and she assured me she’d do exactly that!” he smiled. “i’ll wait until tomorrow to further contact you about this because i’m pretty sure she’ll listen to me. i also wanted to discuss her emergency contacts? the school was going to call you about this, but once they heard we’ve scheduled a meeting, they asked me to discuss it with you.”

   “of course,” you replied, very confused. you closed your notebook, palm resting on top of it, pen in hand. “go on?”

   “after you, we have park sooyoung, kang seulgi, and her father, jung hoseok. we’d called mr. jung a couple days ago for annual information verification and a woman picked up. once we asked for him, they told us we couldn’t have his information and hung up. is the number written correctly? we want to make sure all information is up to date.”

 ��you sighed, angry at how you knew exactly who picked up the phone and how she has no filter when it comes to her personality. “the information i put on seyoung’s documents is up to date, that’s just his partner.”

   “oh, i see,” jungkook muttered, afraid he may have pushed a button. “i’ll let the office know, and we’ll try to contact him again. my dearest apologies for bothering.”

   “it’s fine,” you waved your hand, smiling bitterly. “you’re just doing your job! but, anyway, is there anything else about seyoung? i know the school year has just begun, so there may not be much from your end just yet, but i’m glad you can see just how gifted seyoung is. she’s my pride and joy.”

   “i’m glad she has a supportive family,” he smiled, adjusting the papers within the file and closing it, tucking it back into its respective folder. “that’s very important in a child’s life.” he stood up from his chair, prompting you to do the same. “i’m glad we could have this talk, ms. (y/n). we can call this a success!” he shook your hand firmly, smiling brightly. after gathering his things he led you outside of the classroom, presumably walking you to the front. “i’ve heard of your work for these big k-pop groups. i almost trained to be in one myself, but i ended up going to college and becoming a teacher.”

   “that’s so interesting! did you get accepted?” you gazed at him in surprise. he had the looks and charisma to be a famous idol.

   “i did! i was accepted to many, many companies, but i couldn’t leave my parents at home, so i stayed.” he explained, smiling. “it was my dream to perform, up until i got my teaching degree. i love these little ones, and i love what i do. i don’t know if performing could give me even the slightest bit of happiness that seeing bright, young minds every day offers me.”

   “that’s such an interesting story. it’s very respectable, your love for teaching. i appreciate it, deeply.” you replied, opening the door of the school for him after he finished checking out. “thank you for this!” you shook his hand one more time, this time, with confidence. 

   “no, (y/n), thank you.” he smiled, his eyes locking with yours.

  the two of you went your separate ways, him to his car in the teachers’ designated parking lot, and you to your car, where you saw sooyoung texting on her phone and seyoung snoozing away in her car seat. “what the heck happened to seyoung?” you asked, startling sooyoung with the sudden opening of the car door. she scowled at you, slapping your arm.

   “(y/n), if i didn’t love you, you’d be dead meat.” sooyoung turned her head and glanced at seyoung’s sleeping form, her head resting against the cushion of her car seat. “we talked for a little bit, but she was just so tired that she dozed off the moment i started playing some music. it’s okay, though, that means we’ll have some silence on the way back.” she smiled, buckling herself in. “how’d it go?”

   “how’d it go?” you repeated as you pulled out of the driveway, spotting jungkook getting into his car from your rearview mirror. “well, it went pretty well, i’d say. he told me about how seyoung’s a gifted child and we went over some database things as well.”

   “of course he told you she’s gifted! what have i been telling you ever since she was born? this girl is going to grow up and become president.” sooyoung whined, squeezing your free hand briskly. “what about him?” she asked, shaking her shoulders. 

   “jungkook? what about him?” you asked, stretching your neck to eye the exit you needed to take. 

   “everything! he’s more good looking than i ever imagined him to be; is he single?” she exclaimed, making you almost break right in the middle of the highway. 

   “is he single?” you sputtered, face reddening. “how would i know something like that? his love life has nothing to do with seyoung’s performance in school!” 

   “i don’t know, i just saw the two of you standing next to each other and i knew it could work out! i mean, two attractive people with a perfect height difference and similar interests? how can that not spell out love to you?” sooyoung snorted, grinning. 

   “oh, no, sooyoung,” you warned, shaking your head. “do not try to play matchmaker with me again. you remember what it was like when i met that weirdo, yugyeom, through you? are you serious?” 

   “come on, he was nice! he paid for dinner!” she defended.

   “no, i paid for dinner, he told me about his life story on the first date. never again will I ever trust you to match me with someone else.” you corrected her, the two of you laughing at the absurdity of that night.

   “it was one time!” she cackled in between breaths. no matter what it was, sooyoung could always make you burst out into hilarious laughter. “but, you didn’t answer my question. is. he. single?”

  you paused, glancing to the side. “he doesn’t have a ring—”

   “he doesn’t have a ring!” she exclaimed, shaking her fists in excitement. “no ring, no problem!”

   “hey, that doesn’t mean he’s not seeing someone! i mean, have you seen him, sooyoung? look at him! he probably has thousands of people in his messages asking for dates.” you groaned, realizing that if you did want to start something with him, you’d probably have no chance.

   “yeah, (y/n), i did see him.” she replied, looking at you. “i was looking at him, and the whole time, he was looking at you.”

—

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[fantastica-sff]

fandom for the character ask game: marvel, to give you SO MANY to pick from lol

blorbo (favorite character, character I think about the most): At this point it's easily T'Challa, as much as it pains me there's not going to be any more of the character (I doubt even What If is going to reuse him), but at least this means he won't be subject to any shitty writing. Still, I wish I could see further development of my smart and kind boy...

scrunkly (my “baby”, character that gives me cuteness aggression, character that is So Shaped): Mantis, she is absolutely adorable and I love her and the writing of her trauma and interactions with Drax in GotG v2 are the most frustrating part of the film that I otherwise place among my MCU best faves for what it achieves in its second half. Yes, more than the absolutely unfunny Taserface joke. Anyway, kick names and take ass, my baby.

scrimblo bimblo (underrated/underappreciated fave): Scott Lang, though it's probably less underappreciated in terms of fans and more in terms of writers because everyone that isn't Peyton Reed and Paul Rudd seems to treat the poor guy as a complete idiot, starting with [censored] who wrote Endgame and have everyone except Banner, Nat, and Steve be openly dismissive and derisive of him.

glup shitto (obscure fave, character that can appear in the background for 0.2 seconds and I won’t shut up about it for a week): Kamina from the T'Challa Star-Lord universe in What If season 1. Yes, my girl, break every bone in the Collector's body. GET HIM

poor little meow meow (“problematic”/unpopular/controversial/otherwise pathetic fave): Kat Dennings' Darcy. She's oddly unpopular for otherwise the only bright spot in the first two Thor films that isn't Loki. Though she appears to have found more popularity after WandaVision, so I don't know how accurate it is anymore XD

horse plinko (character I would torment for fun, for whatever reason): Loki. They are, unfortunately for them, always best written while suffering or otherwise miserable 😅

eeby deeby (character I would send to superhell): I want to say Star-Lord, but that's more because of my distaste for Chris Pratt. Otherwise... let's say Stephen Strange - easily the least appealing of MCU leads at this point. And Wong's a better and more fun wizard anyway. Would Strange go on a late night karaoke? Pfft.

[lemonsandstrawberries]

A Day for Romance

fandom: Stony (Steve x Tony)

summary: Tony and Steve didn’t have a romantic Valentine’s day in years and when Tony decides to fix it, something unexpected stops him. 

length: 1 831

a/n: Happy Valentine’s Day, everyone! I know some people dislike this day, but for me, it was always more about celebrating all kinds of love, not only the romantic one, but love to your friends, to your pets, to everyone who you hold dear to your heart, and to yourself! So, treat yourself today, because you deserve it! if you like this fic, don’t forget to show me some love, feedback, reblogs and likes are appreciated and needed!

—————

A Day for Romance

"Tony... What's that?"

Steve found himself not able to stop smiling. There was some feeling coming back, one he didn't feel quite in a while, or at least not as prominently as now. Giddiness? Yes, that was the word.

By Tony's smile, twitching and spreading and the happy sparkle in his eyes, Steve could say that Tony felt the same, pleased that his Valentine's surprise worked out so well. Every day, their bedroom presented quite simple, with crumpled sheets, lone clothes here and there, organized in a modern, minimalistic style and with few heartwarming accents like their wedding photo on the nightstand, or more humoristic ones, meaning the tie with a ducky pattern, looped over the wardrobe handle. This was like cupid decided to drop by, got drunk on Tony's scotch, and vomited everywhere.

"Oh my gosh, how did you even - " Steve laughed, still not believing what he was seeing. He was an artist and had a good eye for color, but it was like Tony used the whole palette of red and pink shades and sprinkled random Valentine's day accents all over their bedroom, from the cheesiest giant pastel pink teddy bear, ending on the enormous deep red bouquet of royal roses.

"I decided that we didn't have enough of romance in the past Valentine's days and decided to make up for it," Tony said, sashaying over to Steve, his hips doing some magic movements. To cut the sugar down, Tony chose to wear a simple, black suit, that made him stand out nicely.

"Make up for it?" Steve asked in humor. "More like cramming last five years into it," he answered himself. It wasn't like he and Tony lacked romance in their relationship, it just simmered down into something more steady and comfortable in the last years. Being together for almost a decade developed their relationship from the wild and not having enough of each other into a sturdy and comfortable feeling of knowing that the other person would be always there. The love was still present and growing, not needing outbursts of feelings, but small everyday gestures of devotion. That's what their last Valentine's days embodied which took a form of a shared dinner over a movie and cuddling on the couch while in sweatpants. And it was as good as during the early years of their relationship when they had decided to meet in a hotel under fake names, romance each other all over again, and spent a wild night together.

"Are you complaining?" Tony asked, pressing himself to his husband and grabbing by the collar, pulling him down. "Because if you are, I am not above spanking you to put you back in order, soldier," Tony purred out, their lips brushing together.

"No, sir," Steve denied with a smile, moving his face to match Tony's, lips getting closer and closer. "And I gotta say, you clean up rather nicely," Steve said, meaning that it has been a while since Tony wore a suit, not for a formal event, not for a public speaking, but just for his husband.

"Wish I could say the same about you, but there is an awfully lot of clothes on you for me to be sure," Tony breathed out. Steve wouldn't call a t-shirt and jeans a lot of clothes, but the message was well received. Their lips finally met, slow and passionate, and they stumbled together, falling on the, of course, rose petals covered bed, making them fly everywhere. Greedy fingers went into motion, peeling clothes of each other, lips wanting more and more -

"ACHEW!" Steve turned his head away, blocking his mouth with his hand.

"Uh," Tony blinked, his tie and dress shirt halfway off, "bless you."

"Thanks, babe," Steve rubbed his nose, trying to cease the tingly feeling. "Where did we stop?"

"Hmm, somewhere here," Tony smiled charmingly, pointing with a finger to his neck. Steve leaned down eagerly, ready to suckle and kiss the offered skin, when the irritating feeling came back and he straightened up abruptly, sneezing again.

"Steve? What's wrong?" Tony asked, lifting on his elbows and sounding alarmed. It wasn't like Steve to get sick all out of sudden.

"Nothing, it's nothing - " Steve tried to brush it off, but another sneeze happened. And then another one. And then he felt his throat becoming tight and eyes water and all of this was oddly familiar and disturbing.

"Oh my God, get out!" Tony panicked, not liking what he was seeing, and easily identified as an allergy attack. Roses? The scented candles? The new silk sheets in red color sprayed with essentials oils? There were too many variables and there was no time to analyze them all before Steve's head would swell like a tomato.

"Dohny, I'm fined -"

"You are not fine!" Tony decided, batting Steve off of him and pushing out of the bedroom, "Claritin is the kitchen cupboard, take it!" he ordered in a firm voice which was a total contrast to the half-naked torso and loose tie. Before Steve could react, Tony slammed the door shut, needing to air the room out first.

Well, that killed the mood quickly.

One cleaning and few pills of Claritin later, they ended on the couch, Steve's head settled on Tony's lap, as he still felt a bit fuzzy. Tony put some movie on, but Steve didn't pay attention, going over what just happened.

"Ugh, this sucks," Steve said in dismay, sniffling, the stuffiness in his nose not going away yet.

"The movie? I can change it," Tony said, gently playing with Steve's hair.

"No, not that -" Steve lifted himself to look better at his husband. Tony's gaze followed him and there was some surprise in his eyes, as Steve looked irritated. Irritated with himself. "You wanted to do something nice and I feel like I ruined it."

"Define 'nice'," Tony grinned, using air quotes at the second word, showing that while it was supposed to be nice, at first, he got carried away and crammed as much Valentine's day gadgets as he could fit in their bedroom just because he could, which pretty much caused his husband to suffocate, literally. Steve didn't reply, just jutted his bottom lip forward, feeling that he ruined the day. "Hey, don't make that face," Tony said softly, framing his husband's face with both hands, thumbs brushing below the jawline tenderly. "I can always reuse that stuff next year," he grinned, trying to fix the mood.

"Sure, just this year, we ended in the same spot, as last year," Steve sighed.

"It is a good spot. Comfy," Tony replied, rubbing Steve's cheeks playfully before letting go. He patted his lap back, urging Steve to lay down again. Steve's eyes followed the movement, and then he slid his gaze up, all over the expensive suit and white shirt with undone top buttons, no sight of the tie, his gaze heating up. Such a waste. It all could very well lead in one direction if it wasn't for a question burning in the back of his head.

"Do you think the serum is wearing off?" Steve asked, words running together.

"Pshhh. What?" Tony snorted in humor, but his face changed when he saw how alarmed Steve looked. "I don't know. I don't think so? But we don't exactly have anyone else to compare, you're one of a kind," Tony smiled kinder.

"I shouldn't have any allergies. I remember having allergies, but it all stopped since I took the serum and - " Steve rambled, spiraling into something bad. If his allergies came back, who knew what would come next. And when. And that really scared him.

"Hey, shhh," Tony took Steve's hand and squeezed it, trying to get him back. When their eyes met, Steve's blue ones showed a lot of uncertainty, while Tony's brown ones were calm. "I understand you are worried, but it was one thing, Steve. One thing that was easily fixed with some pills for allergies."

"What if it is not one thing?" Steve asked in a sad whisper.

"Then it will be more things and I will love you just as much I love you now," Tony assured, bringing Steve's hand closer and kissing his knuckles. That made Steve smile. "You still love me too, even if I changed, right?" Tony asked, meaning the flow of time and what it was doing to him. His hair became a bit more grey, eyes were set deeper and more often there was some sort of pain in his bones, one he didn't remember having. It was all part of life and couldn't exactly be stopped.

"You're always beautiful to me," Steve said honestly, meaning every word. He was seeing the same Tony was, but in contrary to Tony, Steve appreciated every change. It made Tony real and tangible and warm, and Steve didn't want a frozen perfection, almost unnatural. The day Steve had found his first grey hair among blonde ones, they both had celebrated, Steve maybe a bit more than Tony, relieved that even if it happened slower, he was aging. He didn't want to live forever and he certainly didn't want to live without Tony and it gave him hope that he won't have to. Just losing the serum was a different story. A one that had danger written all over it.

"That's sweet," Tony smiled, "and you will be always handsome to me, even when you sneeze your lungs out and get teary-eyed," Tony joked, meaning the allergies attack.

"Ha-ha," Steve fake laughed, causing Tony to laugh back, just real and honest. Beautiful. "No need to rub in my face that I ruined our Valentine's day."

"And night. I don't think it is safe to go to the bedroom yet," Tony pointed out, not wanting to risk another attack.

"Right," Steve sighed. Sleeping on the couch was not an option, but maybe they could use one of the guest floors in the Tower. Still, the mood was gone. Seemed that it wasn't a day for romance after all. Tony didn't like Steve blaming himself over something so silly and decided to fix the mood.

"Friday, dim the lights, cue some music," he said, and when the first notes of a soothing melody started to seep in, the lights got softer, Tony stood up and spoke again, offering Steve a hand. "May I have this dance?"

Steve chuckled softly, looking at his husband's calm and smiling face. Tony had this almost magical ability to fix things for Steve. After all, his husband was a mechanic, building and fixing was his thing and it went further than machines.

"You know I will step on your feet, right?" Steve asked teasingly, accepting the hand, and stood up.

"I wouldn't have it any other way," Tony kept smiling, putting his arm around Steve's shoulders, Steve drawing his husband close and holding him by the hip. Pressed together, gently swaying to the music, they celebrated Valentine's day just as they liked - intimately and close.

[ootori-sibs]

Through the eyes of the patriarch

Part 2: The game

Tw: implied neglect

With Fiyumi living with her husband and Akito off at university, mealtimes at the mansion were quite quiet. Yoshio picked at his food as he watched his sons silently eat; Yuuichi was reading a newspaper, one about innovations in the medical industry, Kyoya, on the other hand, was focused entirely on his food, staring down at it with a faraway look in his mind, a pensive look that if the light had hit his glasses like it so often did, it might just look like a glare- was this what Souh had mentioned. Yoshio silently sighed, swallowing his pride, “Kyoya?” He couldn’t help but notice how Kyoya jolted, instantly sitting up and adjusting his glasses, he didn't mention it though, “is there something on your mind?”

Kyoya was clearly worried, Yoshio noticed, and even Yuuichi glanced up from his newspaper. “No father, I’m just not that hungry.”

Hm, that was a lie, clearly. Yoshio just nodded, he didn’t really want to press it, so he opted to change the subject, “so, how was school?” That was something Yuzuru had suggested he do, it felt very unnatural coming from him but he hoped Kyoya would appreciate it.

“I- pardon?” the boy looked so shocked and almost scared, “why? Is something wrong, father?” Kyoya was definitely scared and Yoshio understood why, even Yuuichi’s eyes had gone wide. Yoshio wasn’t usually the type to ask about things like that unless something was wrong- he did have his doubts about Souh’s suggestion.

“No, not at all,” he assured Kyoya, still unable to sound anything other than professional, “I'm just curious.”

“Oh,” Kyoya seemed a little disorientated now, frowning but looking quite surprised still, “well it’s good, we did a 1800s america theme in the club so we saved money reusing those little hair extensions, although mine was a little too long so I had to get a new one.”

“Oh yes, I believed you mentioned the whole dressing up thing,” Yoshio did not agree with the idea of dressing up to attract such people, he thought it sounded incredibly improper, "I assume you had, uh… fun?"

"Well I don't really find the cosplay part of it fun, I prefer to sit quietly with some tea and work on the finances or some homework," there he is, that's Yoshio's son for you, ever the studious one. "Unfortunately," oh, Kyoya wasn't done, "I couldn't get much done, as Tamaki had taken it upon himself to behave strangely today," the boy let out a laboured sigh, clearly tired of Souh's antics, Yoshio almost regretted the deal he'd made with Yuzuru before he even told Kyoya.

"Strangely? How so?"

He seemed a lot more relaxed now, Yoshio was surprised by how Kyoya seemed a bit more willing to talk then when they began, "I'm not sure what's gotten into him today, but he was even more clingy and he wouldn't even let me eat lunch by myself, he usually leaves me to do that."

"You eat lunch by yourself?" Yuuichi finally spoke up, placing his newspaper down. Yoshio was surprised to hear him chime in, Yuuichi usually didn't interrupt things, though he saw that his heir's eyes were filled with concern, "do you always eat alone? If you have friends shouldn't you be spending lunchtimes with them?"

Kyoya paused, glancing down, "I spend a lot of time with them, I simply enjoy a little bit of a quiet rest. It's easier to enjoy my meal in some peace and quiet."

"It's not crime," Yoshio confirmed, "I mean, if the Souh boy is as annoying as is to be assumed, I can't blame you for wishing for some peace." He watched Yuuichi nod, sitting back down, then saw Kyoya frown in the corner of his eyes, he seemingly got angry but bit it back, presumably fighting the urge to defend the Souh boy. Yoshio was beginning to believe Yuzuru was right in his assumption, but there was one detail he had realised. "Did he have an excuse for this new behaviour?"

"No father, I didn't ask him."

"Hm," at least Tamaki knew when to keep his trap shut, he must have gotten that from Anne-sophie. "Alright then, I checked your grades this morning and you're still doing perfect, I couldn't find fault if I tried." Yoshio saw how Kyoya looked mildly surprised, he'd gotten an A- on an assignment and usually he'd be tough on that front, or at least bring it up, but Yuzuru had suggested care and leniency, so Yoshio was going to let that one go; everyone struggles at one subject anyway.

After dinner, Yoshio was straight on the phone to Souh, Yuzuru picked up instantly, just like he knew he would. "Good evening Ootori, is everything alright?" He seemed to be in quite the chipper mood, he wouldn't be for long.

Walking through the halls with his phone in hand, Yoshio let his tone drop to a drawl- not quite a growl, "Yuzuru…" that idiot, Yoshio had half a mine to cut him down where he stood. Instead, he took a deep breath and continued towards his office.

"Oh! Oh ok, something's definitely wrong. What's got you in such a mood?"

"Did you tell your son?"

"Huh? Tell Tamaki… oh, about the arrangement? Of course I did, why?"

Ugh, what a moron. How this guy got to be the head of a company, Yoshio had no clue. "He's been acting differently towards Kyoya, who doesn't know yet. What kind of a moron do-!"

"Why didn't you tell him?"

What? Yuzuru's question cut through Yoshio's thoughts and left him hanging there, why hadn't he told Kyoya? He supposed he didn't want his son to worry about having to behave differently, or maybe it was because he technically wasn't supposed to know of Kyoya's persuasion? Yoshio wasn't sure.

"I don't know, Yuzuru. I believe I should wait a little first, but if you insist on telling your boy, I suppose I must tell mine, I just-"

"Oh! A game!"

"A game? What?" Yoshio was annoyed by Yuzuru interrupting him, to suggest a game? What kind of a childish bastard was this man?

"Tamaki can try and romance Kyoya without the arrangement hanging over their heads! Well Tamaki will know but he is absolutely ecstatic about marrying his best friend! So it will seem to Kyoya that it's perfectly natural!"

"Are you suggesting we encourage your heir toy with my son's emotions?" He was nothing if not a protective father, Yoshio was, and if this was truly what Yuzuru intended, then he could not and would not allow it

"No, no! Not what I meant! I mean, Kyoya is a hesitant kid when it comes to emotions, Tamaki can help ease him into the idea before we drop the bombshell. Making it a game is just a plus!" Yuzuru was, certainly a strange man, Yoshio had known him for quite a while but failed to understand a word that left the old codger's mouth.

"I…" he sighed, standing still for just a moment, "a week, I'll give him a week."

"Huh?"

"Your son has a week, I'm giving him the opportunity to win over Kyoya of his own accord before I tell him of the arrangement," he spoke clearly and concisely, leaving no room for doubt.

"Tamaki can do that easily!"

"The only rules are that it must stay innocent and that he is not allowed to tell Kyoya about the arrangement himself. Understood?" Yoshio ignored the previous comment from Yuzuru, disliking how the man had implied Kyoya to be 'easy' as it were.

"Understood," Yuzuru confirmed, sounding pleased still, "is that all you wanted to talk about?"

"Hm, I believe so. Unless you wish to bet on how easily my son will yield?"

Yuzuru just laughed at that, "you are a harp Yoshio! You should try cracking jokes more often, you're good at it!" He seemed rather cheerful, and Yoshio would almost think it contagious, "I'll have to pass on the waivers, I still need to convince my mother that this is good for business."

Oh that woman, there wasn't a woman more hated than Shizue in all of the upper crust. Yoshio scoffed at the mere thought of her, "good luck there Souh, if you need; I have plenty of dirt on her."

"I'll pass on blackmailing my mother for now as well, au revoir Yoshio."

With that, Souh ended the call, leaving Yoshio in silence. He sighed and continued on his way towards his office, he couldn’t believe he’d just agreed to something like that, he usually wouldn’t. He supposed this might be good, to indulge in revelry? Was that not what Yuzuru had encouraged? Yoshio began to wonder if maybe he shouldn’t rely on only one person for this kind of advice. He shook the thought from his mind and continued on to his office.

When he arrived at his office door, however, Yuuichi was standing there, waiting for him. "Father?" He glanced at Yoshio, standing up from where he'd been leaning against the wall, "can I ask you a question?"

"Hm," Yoshio frowned, unlocking the door to his office, "what is it?" He knew that tone in Yuuichi's voice, this question would not be about business. Walking into the office, Yoshio didn't glance back at his son as the young man spoke again.

"Why have you been behaving so gently towards Kyoya as of late?"

Hm, Yoshio paused, not glancing back. He knew he'd been a terrible father, but to hear that Yuuichi considered merely asking about Kyoya's day as being soft, he must have been worse than he thought. "Yuuichi, there's nothing wrong with inquiring about my son's day, it's not gentle to care about my son."

"You never did that before."

Yoshio froze.

His son, his darling, eldest boy, his heir, his pride and joy, he thought Yoshio didn't care… it was enough to break the old man’s heart. Yoshio closed his eyes, forcing years of emotional repression to do its job, he can’t cry, not in front of his heir. He straightened his back, letting out a small sigh, “Yuuichi, are you jealous of your brother?”

“Pardon?”

He turned to look at him, the sadness on Yuuichi’s face was clear under the attempt to stay stoic, Yoshio had never paid that much attention to his children's emotions but he knew that Yuuichi was hurting. "You're jealous I'm trying to show care towards Kyoya, aren't you? I understand, you're allowed to feel like that. I failed to be a father to you, I'm trying to actually behave like a father now." He sat down, "is there anything you think I should have done for you? I'm willing to give you what you deserve."

Yuuichi visibly paused, he clearly hadn't been expecting such honesty and openness from Yoshio. The man himself sat there silently, waiting for his son's response. The usually strong and resilient heir genuinely teared up at those words, "father…"

"I'm not going to be very good at it," Yoshio made sure to warn him, recognising his lack of emotional intelligence. Yuuichi didn't seem to care, wiping his eyes.

"Father… if you're really willing to care about us… then would you like to come and play golf with me next week?" Ah, Yuuichi, Yoshio really adored his kid, he nodded, a tired smile on his face.

"Of course I will, that sounds like a good day." He watched Yuuichi's expression, that smile was a rare one; the kind he made whenever Yoshio verbally expressed pride in him. Yoshio wondered if he'd get smiles like that one from all his children once he gets better at the whole parenting thing… he hoped so.

Pouring himself a glass of whiskey, he watched his son leave the room. He opened his laptop and got to work, just some basic, mindless admin work, he had a lot of people to do all the hard work for him. So all he really had to do was check everything he was sent and provide feedback when needed,

He sat down to get some work done, he didn’t really have that much to do as he had people to do most of the work for him, all Yoshio really had to do was answer a few emails and review information. It was easy work really, there was very little for him to do that day, so he decided to ‘lighten up a little’ as Yuzuru had put it, pouring himself some tea and putting a vinyl on the gramophone- he remembered learning how to dance to this song, he’d learnt in middle school, he was told his future wife needed him to be cultured. He’d always found that amusing, it was always other people telling him what she wanted, she never told him any of this herself. Yoshio wondered if that had been the same for Fiyumi's husband, he had made demands for her after all… that might have just been a parental thing.

Speaking of making demands of your child's betrothed; Yoshio had completely abandoned his work, instead he was typing up a list of demands Tamaki had to meet. He wasn't going to ask for the club to be disbanded, (he saw how well it had ended for Eclair) but he still wanted Tamaki to lower the amount of girls he was seeing just a little. He also asked that Tamaki work harder to please Shizue, Yoshio wanted his future son-in-law to have a guaranteed career and he would be willing to speak to Shizue herself if need be. There were certain subjects that Tamaki needed to work harder at, but mostly Yoshio just wanted to ensure that his son would be well loved by this boy- he didn't trust the Souh heir but he might if the child put in a little effort.

A few hours afterwards, once he'd finished his work and emailed the list of demands to the Souh boy, Yoshio began to head down towards his room. It had been a long day and he was tired, so he was planning to get some sleep earlier than usual- it was only midnight after all.

The corridors of the mansion were quiet at this time of night, and it sent shivers down Yoshio’s spine. He could swear he saw a shadow In the corner of his eyes, but continued on his way up the stairs to the third floor.

When he reached the landing, he saw a silhouette, stepping forward, he realised it was just Kyoya… why was Kyoya up so late? He appeared to be holding a cup of coffee, and Yoshio had half a mind to fire whatever maid gave it to him. Kyoya looked so tired, clutching the cup of coffee in one hand and a piece of paper in the other, he was staring out the window and he looked like he was questioning life. Yoshio couldn't blame him.

He slowly stepped forward, trying to get a better view of Kyoya's expression. "Kyoya? What are you doing awake?"

Kyoya glanced at him, looking surprised, "father? Oh, good morning…"

"It's not morning Kyoya…"

"Oh, I thought…"

Yoshio sighed, massaging his temples, "why are you out of bed?"

"I haven't gone to bed yet today actually…" Kyoya confessed, hanging his head in shame. Yoshio sighed, this evening had contained too much parenting for his liking.

Putting a hand on Kyoya's shoulder, Yoshio did his best to sound gentle, "is there something on your mind?" He was really uneasy with this, he hated showing emotions but Kyoya was clearly bothered by something.

Kyoya was hesitant, clearly not used to Yoshio giving him this kind of attention, "I…" he looked startled and confused, his little, half-asleep brain trying to figure out whether or not this was a trap. Yoshio supposed that was his fault for training his kids to never let their guard down. Kyoya did just that after a few seconds, sighing and glancing down at the paper in his hand, "father… do you want to read this?"

Yoshio nodded, taking the paper and looking at it. For all he read it, he couldn't understand what the fuck it was talking about, it was in Japanese, yes, but it was still complete poetic nonsense. He couldn't make heads nor tails of it, it was just a bunch of metaphors on metaphors and just, just so much prose. Yoshio was 60% sure this was supposed to be romantic but he was absolutely terrible at this sort of thing, what he was sure of, however, was that the Souh boy definitely wrote this, the sudden french phrases in the middle of Japanese sentences was rather telling.

He hands the paper back to Kyoya, "so Souh gave this to you? Did he say anything?"

"No, but he's been acting strange all day."

Nodding slowly, Yoshio glanced out the window, "do you like him, Kyoya?"

"What..?" The shake in Kyoya's voice broke Yoshio's heart, the fear in his tone a reminder of how distant Yoshio had been. "Well… I…" a defeated sigh left his youngest son's lips, and Kyoya hung his head, not meeting Yoshio's eyes, "yes."

"Alright then," Yoshio offered a smile, "tell him so. Those Souh's thrive on attention, give him what he craves." Kyoya looked up at him in surprise, but Yoshio simply shrugged, "as long as you don't put yourself beneath him then I don't see any issue. Now go to bed."

"I…" Kyoya was still so shocked, staring at him with his mouth agape for just a second before nodding, "yes father." He hurried off down the corridor towards his room.

"Goodnight Kyoya," Yoshio sighed, putting his hands in his pockets and shambling towards his own room. He wondered if it was the being gay or the liking Tamaki that Kyoya thought he wouldn't approve of, both of those thoughts made Yoshio uneasy. He'd scared his child into fearing his opinions that much, he's definitely been doing something wrong, he has to fix that.

[blueberrypossum]

A Colorful Massacre  Mickey x Reader

Hey guys!!! Yup, it’s Mickey’s turn to be placed in the love boat. This story is going to be a little different than my previous ones( sorry no making out and such). This story is based on one of the scenes from the movie Harley Quinn: Birds of Prey. I really like the action scenes, especially where Harley goes into the police station and I thought it would be a perfect fit( some scenes will be altered and so will dialogue). Hope you guys enjoy it! Also, I might’ve made the reader a little bit crazy, I try to change up the personalities with each reader to give each writing a difference.

Word Vocabulary:

(F/C)- Favorite color (these will be labeled 1 and 2 because you’ll need two signature colors, like Harley Quinn with red and blue)

(L/N)- Last name 

⚠️WARNING⚠️: There are some cuss words and graphic content (such as fight scenes, gore, and even death.)

You rechecked the location on your phone before you headed over to one the many police stations in the Hidden City, your hands checking to make sure you had everything. Of course the Mud Dogz had to get caught on their last heist, their faces being plastered all over the city in the announcement of their capture. You huffed in a gust of air as the annoyance almost gave you a headache.

Of course those idiots had to get caught on your week off. 

They all crossed your mind in a series of flashes, the picture of Mickey instantly stopping and staining your eyes. The eel somehow wrapped his long body around your heart, literally, if he could he would. You never thought you would go for the hippie type, but hey, in your opinion it was the best option. 

You strapped your gloves on tighter as you finally made it to the police station they were being held at, the enormous building almost touching the dirt surface. Police officers walked around you as you made your way to the front door, not even taking notice of you or your long coat that covered you. You brushed your hand through your hair and waved your fingers at a passing guard, who couldn’t help but stare as you burst yourself through the front doors. 

You were always the one to make a grand entrance.

The waiting area was almost completely empty, except for one yokai in one of the waiting chairs and the police officer behind the counter. 

Oh this is too easy.

You casually walked over to the yokai that was sitting; a young woman who was casually reading a newspaper. She eyes you as you get closer and how lazily bent over, your lips barely hovering over her ear as you whisper unholy nothings into her ear. The woman slowly got up, terror crossing through her face as she left her newspaper and made her way out of the station. You waved goodbye to her and headed towards the cop at the front counter, the officer instantly took notice of your choice of outfit. 

Even with the male officer seeing you coming, you rang the bell next to him anyways, giving him a bright smile as he looked up. 

He let out a long sigh as he questioned, “Can I help you?”

You leaned your elbows onto the counter as you stated, “Yes, good ol’ officer, I’m here to report terrible crime.” You tipped your sunglasses down to show the sarcastic wink you gave him. 

The officer took the wink as some kind of joke and relaxed his shoulders and leaned back in his chair. 

“And what terrible crime is that?”

And with that you pulled your long coat back, revealing the multiple canisters of paint, confetti, hacky sacks, and smoke bombs strapped against your chest, along with a shotgun to use those canisters as ammo. You stripped yourself of your sunglasses as you pulled your shotgun off of your shoulder.

You aimed it at him as you stated, “This one.”

The male yokai quickly went for his gun, but you were just a little faster; you shot a red hacky sack right between his eyes, not only knocking him back but also breaking his glasses. 

As he went slack against the wall, you took your coat off to give you more room to work as you rounded off to the side, letting yourself through the ringing metal detector. 

“Alright, now let’s have some fun.”

You reloaded your shotgun with another hacky sack and headed over to two yokai’s, one being a bird and the other being a dog, both enjoying a cup of coffee. You cocked the weapon at the bird yokai and gave him a wicked smile. 

“Hiya boys.” And shot the red footbag at the officer. The eagle went flying backwards as you went for the dog officer, you leg swinging the coffee out of his hands and then used the underside of the shotgun to knock him out. 

You reloaded the weapon again with your (F/C 1) smoke bomb and aimed it to one of the closest meeting halls, shooting the beautiful color and then slammed the door shut, quickly sliding a door under the handle. The banging against the door filled your ears as cops started to realize what exactly was happening, a crazy yokai was storming through the police station and no one has stopped them yet. Two more yokai ran towards you and with a few swift moves you shot one with confetti and another with (F/C 2), sending a female yokai through one of the windows into an office. You looked at the chaos around you and let out a light chuckle. 

Oh, this is going to be fun indeed.

---------------------------------------------------------

“Mick, I don’t think you can chew the bars off with your teeth.”

“Well, you don’t see Danny putting his teeth to work!”

“Hey! I ain’t ruinin’ these pearly whites.”

The Mud Dogs slid down against the bars as they, once again, ran out of ideas to bust out of jail. They had been stuck at the police station for over a few hours now, each one of their usual plans for busting out no longer worked due to them reusing those plans over and over. 

The electric eel would twiddle his thumbs if he had any, so would create little sparks between his little nubs, the power reducing collar around his neck taking away most of his shocking abilities. They were in all separate cages as well and were with about a dozen other prisoners. With the police station being enormous, the three men had a clear view from the front entrance all the way out to the evidence locker. 

The ogre rolled his eyes as he crossed his arms and Danny let out a low gust of air as he pulled his arms out of the bars and let them hang. 

Mickey let out a bored sigh as a guard walked past, a ugly frown over her face as she eyed the members of the Mud Dogs. Leonard growled as she walked past and the officer quickly made her way to the next section, Mickey couldn’t help but let out a chuckle at the sight.

 “Easy now, Double L, you might scare her off.”

 Mickey let his mind start to wonder and he instantly thought of you. He would be hanging out with you if he wasn’t in jail, both of you either playing games or walking the streets and stealing other yokai’s wallets. Before you came along, the eel never thought that he would find someone like you, especially someone who has gotten the best of him. But, after you successfully saw right through one of his stealing tricks, he felt like it was love at first sight. Of course, it took a lot of trust, and the rule to not steal from each other after the 20th time of doing so, for the both of you to begin a friendship. Now, Mickey gave you anything he stole that he thought you would like. 

A sudden scream came from the front entrance and almost every prisoner looked up, even some getting up and tried to look through the bars. Mickey didn’t pay much attention to it since it was the police station after all, it was probably someone’s first time getting arrested and they were just having a fit. Danny was trying to peek through the bars and a small gasp escaped this throat. 

“Holy shit! Mick, is that your dame?”

Mickey was in awe as you reloaded your shotgun as officers from the opposite side of the holding area started to race out and you perfectly aimed for the first yokai that came up to you first, easily shooting a blue hacky sack into his right shoulder. As he went down, you effortlessly put in another bag and instantly headshot the cop behind him. 

Both Leonard and Mickey hopped up from their spot as other prisoners got interested in the commotion. At the front of the entrance to the cages, (F/C 1 and F/C 2) pooled around the floor as an officer yokai was tossed into the middle of the row of cages. And within the clouds of colors popped out you, the colors ever so fading into your clothes and hair as a devilish smile spread across your face. 

Both Danny and Leonard rolled their eyes at the eel’s starstruck expression, of course they were going to be saved by you, you were the only one crazy enough to come here and go up against several cops alone. They were just shocked that you had made it this far without getting shot. 

The eel could feel his tail curl in content as he watched you take on another two guards, moving your hands to the middle of the gun to hit the one closest to you with the grip of the gun. You hit the wooden end against the yokai’s nose a few times before you turned your attention to the other cop, throwing the gun right between his legs. 

As you made your way out of the colorful gas, the male yokai you shot in the shoulder got up, his fingers pulling out his plastic paton and raced towards you. You quickly ducked as he missed the target and then swung your shotgun over your shoulder, twirling it until it directly aimed at the officer, and a bust of confetti exploded against his face. 

“Hahahahahaahah. Oh wow.”

You let out a cackle as he let out a cry and you swing your gun against his head, instantly knocking him out. 

The prisoners were screaming your name now, not in cheer, but in hate. They knew who you were, they knew who you worked for, and they knew they would rather have you caught than their own freedom. 

You reloaded your shotgun just in time as a female officer came down the stairs, her tail swishing back and forth in anger as she pulled out her gun. You used your longer gun to push her arm away, the bullet meant for your head busted into the ceiling, your strength barely being about to hold the woman’s arm against the wall. You kicked her behind her knee and twisted her arm as she came down, using her back as a stable place to aim as another officer came from the smoke behind you, the paint canister smashing into his head, two different colors blending into the walls. 

You brought your shotgun down against the female yokai’s head and watched as her body went limp on the ground, a sweaty breath escaping your throat as you waited for more cops to come and stop you. When none showed up, you took in the room around you, smiling as you saw the Mud Dogz, and then finally heard the other criminals roaring at you in rage. 

“You stole my life-savings!”

“Hiya, puddin,” you purred as your boyfriend stared at you, blush crossing his cheeks as took in your beaten and overworked body, how the colors you chose for your smoke bombs brighten the shine in your eyes. 

“You’re the reason why I’m in here!”

You gave a polite wave to everyone as you made over to Mickey’s cage, blood staining your teeth as you smiled at him. 

“Hey, lovebugs, we still need to get out of here,” he grumbled, his eyes swinging over to the furious yokai’s in the cages, trying to make as much racket as they could so that anyone could hear them. 

“Just hold on for one second, sweethearts.” You said and then rammed the handle of your gun into the closest criminals throat, before he could even utter your name. The male yokai choked a few times as you repeatedly slammed the shotgun into his throat. You then crashed your gun into the side of his head and then into his leg, bringing him down. The next culprit charged towards you and you instantly got ready, your boyfriend immediately knowing what you were going to do. 

“Right, just give a minute to find a key,” you said and was about to start the search for keys, until a pounding alarm came on, causing you and almost everyone else to cover their ears. One of the officers, too afraid to come and face you, went to the control room instead and got the brilliant idea to unlock all the cages, except for the Mud Dogz. When the ringing stopped, you looked up to see the prisoners crawl out of their cages, sinister smiles on their faces as you were outmatched from 12 to one. You rolled your shoulders and popped your neck as you looked back at the Mud Dogz with a smirk.

Oh how you were a walking masterpiece was all he could think in his mind until Leonard bursted inside his bubble. 

“Batter up!” The eel warned, and your gun went straight into his mouth as you rocked the weapon as a baseball bat. The yokai went flying and the strength behind the blow made him flip over, barely missing his head as he landed on the floor. With you being out of ammo for your shotgun, you threw it across the room, hitting a female yokai in the stomach and then jumped her, your legs wrapping around her as you hands went for her throat.

“Hey! I’m going as fast as I can! I already dealt with the officers up front!” You hollered as a pair of hands went around your throat and slammed you against the prison bars, the cold metal drilling into your back. You spat the leftover blood in your mouth into his face and then slammed your elbow into his elbow pit and twisted his arm until he went limp in your arms. 

“Ah, Mick, your doll is pretty, violent,” the rat said, his eyes growing wide as your fist made contact with someone’s face and then groin area. 

“Yeah, isn't it amazing?” The ell cooed, both of the Mud Doz crew disgusted to see a little drool dripping out of his mouth. 

You then slid under a female cat yokai and to one of the unconscious officers and dug through their pockets. Luck seemed to be on your side as you found the keycard, and then you found fingers digging into your arms as two prisoners pulled you back and tossed you across the room.

You blinked a few times to see a few figures coming towards you, barely being able to make out their faces. You quickly tried to make out the Mud Dogz and then slid the keycard over to the closest cage that they were in before a female hyena punched you in the gut. Danny was the closest and he used his tail to bring the card closer, working his fingers fast as the criminals got closer to you. The rat tossed the card to Mickey as he went over to help you, his claws already tearing into one of the prisoner's back that was closest to him. Mickey used the card to get the collar off and then to unlock the door, tossing the plastic card over to Leonard as he slithered over to the battle. 

The ogre gripped the bars around him, “Yeah, but we are losing time. Y/N needs to get the keys and us out before more show up!”

A grunt escaped your lips as you rubbed your head from the impact. You could feel a hard headache start to form in the back of your skull as you tried to take in your surroundings, someone was yelling your name.

You were being choked out during all of this, red slowly starting to cover your face as you lost the will to breath. You kicked the female in the stomach but she didn’t budge.

The strong hands released you and you crawled away to see Mickey curl around the female hyena, instantly shocking her once her hands left your body. You took in a few gulps of air and watched as the Mud Dogz took care of the rest of the prisoners. You let out a breathy laugh and laid yourself back down, allowing yourself to take a break during all the chaos. 

“Y/N! Y/N! Get up!”

“Come onnnn. Budge motherfucker,” you gasped out, and the hyena yokai let out a raspy cackle as her fingers dug deeper into your throat. 

Mickey was beside you as you took the well-deserved break, his flippers fanning you as Leonard and Danny picked up the cops electric guns.

You looked around, the sprinkle of rainbow confetti, paint, and the smoke from the canisters. The floor was littered with bodies, both cops and criminals knocked out or were whining against the concrete. Your nose was bleeding and bruises painted your body, but the thrill that traveled through your body was an excellent adrenaline high. 

“May I join?”

“Did I do good?” You rasped out and the eel helped you up. 

“Huh, I guess you’re right. No one messes with Y/N fucking L/N!”

“Just take me to that new restaurant downtown and we’ll call it even.”

“Of course, babe! I mean, look at the mess!”

The teal eel planted a kiss on your cheek as he helped you stay steady on your feet, a laugh wheezing out of his throat at you cursing your own name. 

“Pretty sure they’ll be waiting there, let’s go through the back.”

You both regrouped with Danny and Leonard and started to head over to where you came from, but Leonard stopped you all. 

“We owe you big time for this.”

As the rat and ogre made their way towards the back, the long eel took a hold of your hand and pulled you close, a little giggle escaping your lips as you both enjoyed a tender kiss. 

[transsexualhamlet]

*slams fists on table* CATASTROPHE ANIME

yeah this is just my long ranting hypothetical post about “omg what if there was an anime for catastrophe at 16″ because I’m like that @autpunk-godling feel free to add on because we just yell about this for hours on end

I have also now brought it up in the discord server just bc i wanna yell about it

This is the recording of all the shit we came up with screaming about it

-it could only possible like after the manga is finished and translated officially plus resurrection novels probably finished or close to but like,,, we can hope, we can dream, please-

-people coming to it and seeing the trailers and shit would probably see the school and the cherry blossoms and go “oh it’s ouran high school host club but like with swords” and then everyone fucking dies and the fans are like I DID NOT SIGN UP FOR THIS???

-everyone new would know the spoilers for the end by like episode 2 bc manga fans wouldn’t be able to shut up cause someone would just like post a screencap of guren saying “i’m gonna save the world” with a pensive emoji under it some anime only would see it and by the end of the day everyone knows how it ends

-gureshin exposure and seeing it on screen like just imagine how fucking gay it’ll look like I swear this would become the new mikayuu like imagine,,, the beginning when he’s leaning over guren’s desk, the love hotel scene, love hotel 2 electric boogaloo, when they fight over who gets to top omg “become my subordinate” “no u” and every time shinya LOOKS at guren, the part where he comes back to guren’s house and goes “uwu you were looking at my phone”, the motorcycle scene, the *thinks about shinya while taking a bath* the entire part where guren goes demon and shinya saves him and holds him and i,,, and well the entire end

-guren’s va in the last episode would be DEAD lemme tell you the SCREAMING I WANT TO HEAR IT

-Hypothetically this would probably cover 2 seasons, the first season covering books 1-3 and 2nd season covering 4-7, and then like. No one’s gonna want to end it at *guren sticks sword in slot* so like uh resurrection’s gonna need to be a thing unless it gets cancelled which uh fuck i hope not

-more appreciation for characters, THERE WOULD BE PEOPLE ACTUALLY PAYING ATTENTION TO MITO, GOSHI, SHIGURE, AND SAYURI, guren antis would actually just shut up because they’d see him being a fucking softie, and uh well kureto stans would have something to answer for

-the MEME possibility just THINK of the MEMES

-i want to see the trailers,,, i want to see them,,, i want to-

-the levels of horniness compared to vampire reign omg like they’re the same age as yu squad and they like all wanna fuck like how will that translate to anime like

-the. the last episode i. omg it would be so intense I can’t it would be so epic there would be so much blood oh god

-this would cause more exposure for the manga too because 1. the old anime-onlys would come back, 2. everyone already in the manga fandom will be revived for any kind of content, 3. the fans who’ve dropped off will probably watch it, 4. new fans who liked WIT studio shit will be like :eyes emoji:, fans who looked at the trailer and went that sounds kinda gay will watch it, actual shonen fans and people who like high school anime and liked the vampire reign school arc would watch it, like it would have a pretty good base

-like bro there would be actual diversity in ships kjhghjkj like people would actually pay attention to the characters omg please i just want some content like yes of course gureshin but like also the other characters please CATASTROPHE CONTENT OMG I NEED IT C A T A S T R O P H E  C O N T E N T

-you know how the dub for the vampire reign anime is like 80 percent gayer than the sub with the “girlfriend or boyf-” “or a lover” etc uh how can they possibly make some of the shit in ca16 gayer but they WOULD like uh some of the stuff shinya already says in canon is like so fucking gay like the “you’ll never get a husband if you don’t let me clean your wound haha”, the misunderstanding in the love hotel, the “uwu people will think we’re a couple” on the motorcycle, all of that, there’s more, literally every time someone makes a joke about being in love with guren fucking-

-it would actually be good bc new anime tends to be Shit so yeah people would watch it I swear I think it would get even better ratings than vampire reign because it has a comprehensible plot and the ending and shit is already decided, I think different people would like it

-ok but like the problem is there’s a different beginning in the manga and the light novels of ca16. And like, the manga’s beginning would be a really bad thing to go with. In the light novel, the book starts right off with Guren going into first shibuya high school with sayuri and shigure, explaining the situation with the ichinoses and the hiragis. That’s a good beginning, it gives a good idea of what the story’s gonna be like, it doesn’t give away what’s going to happen. Whereas in the manga, they decided to shoot in before that a bullshit chapter that’s straight out of fucking tokyo babylon. I don’t even,,, it was really bad, and it doesn’t even seem to be canon. There’s no indication that’s anything but like crossover fanfic because the gist of that chapter was Guren, Sayuri, and Shigure like,,, exorcising a bitch which is like so not the vibe of this story. It makes no sense?? That’s not even what Guren did in middle school? What???? There’s also a bunch of really offputting shit in there, if you’ve ever seen it. That’s gonna get rid of so many potential fans. It’s a really bad idea. Also at the end it literally gives away the fact that Guren’s gonna end the world which is just. shit. it’s shit. Like everyone’s gonna know anyway just don’t give it away in canon!!! It was a bad idea in the manga and it would be a terrible decision to do in a potential anime.

-what would it even be rated omg like it’s. So much hornier than vampire reign so like I don’t even fucking know like, there is sex,,, with fucking m a h i r u, i don’t like that, and i mean other than that every other word out of someone’s mouth is wanna fuck like that’s fine in a light novel but on screen uh

-!!!!!! THE OP AND ED !!!!!!!!! the SHIT that would be FORESHADOWED in the ENDING i sWEAR TO GOD I JUST WANT TO S E E  I T like even if they just reused scapegoat and xu it would still be fucking amazing LIKE OK. KAGAMI FORESHADOWED CHAPTER 94 WITH THE ORIGINAL ED WHAT THE F U C K KIND OF FORESHADOWING WOULD GO ON WITH CA16

I just really really really want another song to vibe to ok and I want to see the images i want to see them fighting I want to see them in front of cherry blossoms uuuuuuuuuuu please like I want to see Mahiru like posing with two swords or some shit please omg please mahiru don’t turn into a demon you’re so sexy ahaha

like broooo I really just want to see it like anime ops are just so amazing and epic and the eds are all kinda sad and foreshadowy and UH FOR CATASTROPHE THAT’S LIKE A L O T LIKE THE IMAGES THAT PEOPLE WHO KNOW WHAT THEY ARE ARE JUST GONNA SEE AND GO “F U C K” like just imagine the ed having like. like guren’s sword in a slot in a white room or like a flash forward to the world after it’s ended

-we can see on screen, colored: NOYA, SAITO, (ferid with green hair???), I want to see all of them omg also maybe they can decide for sure what aoi’s eye color is

-THE ELEVATOR FIGHT WITH GUREN AND SAITO GHHHGHGHGHGH I JUST WANNA S E E IT

-we get to see them actually fight with magic and not like jumping off of buildings abilities and shit

-Guren going demon omg omg omg

-BABY YU BABY YU BABY YU BABY MIKA BABY MIKA BABY SHINOA BABY SHINOA

-I think the anime wouldn’t want to have it end with Guren sticking the sword in the slot so I think they’re probably pull a vampire reign episode 1 and after the sword thing just like,,, fast forward to a quick ambiguous shot of Guren at 24 standing in a broken world in his demon army uniform uuuh like OW I WANNA SEE IT I WANT TO SEE IT I WANT TO oH MY GOD THE CINEMATOGRAPHY-

-in conclusion *mails kagami 12 dollars* pwease mw kagami

[cas-rivaille]

Heyyyyyyy I’d like to request a matchup if that’s okay 👌

I’m Aspen it’s nice to meet you- I go by they/them pronouns but I really want to switch to they/he but my anxiety has been stopping me. I’m a Sagittarius and an INFP 4w3 (yes, I know I’m so sorry 🤕) and I also have ADHD and possibly autism.

I absolutely adore anything creative, I like to draw & write but I really wanna get back into acting, as the pandemic kinda fucked that up. Music. I LOVE music with a passion. I’ve always wanted to learn bass guitar but the cost of one has always shut that down. When I was a kid I’d preform solos at Christmas concerts, and I did choir for a short amount of time. Sadly dysphoria messed me up singing wise but I’d love to get back into it if I ever get to go on testosterone. So I’m hoping I can get back into music & acting this year

I make an obscene amount of sex jokes, like at this point there should be a counter cause I make ATLEAST 30 a day. The funniest part is that I’m on the ace spectrum. (I’m panromantic and a sex positive gray-ace, let’s go gamers 🦾) I’m a massive fucking fruitcup, like im as straight at a wet spaghetti noodle and it really shows in my personality. I’m very flamboyant.

I’m extremely hyperactive and social when I’m not around my family, and I’m always up to talk to someone as long as they respect my boundaries (heck I’ve had a history of being too much and scaring others away, it was kinda depressing). Even though I love to talk to people I have a bad habit of stumbling and stuttering when I get excited, so people tend to mistake that for me being shy or awkward.

I have wicked bad dysphoria and self confidence issues, but I try not to show it so I say, fake it till you make it 🦾 I also fidget ALOT in public and that I’m not ashamed of. Im trying to find a chewy fidget toy so I don’t constantly bite my hand in public 🤕

Sorry this is all over the place but quick description of myself I guess. I’m built like a twink, at the “tall” height of 5’2 or 157 cm. I have fluffy/curly hair that was originally brown, but I dyed to black after a good old fashion mental breakdown. I have blue eyes and glasses, and most typically you’ll find me in a grunge or emo aethsetic. Although I can’t stick to one for more then a month so I tend to find ways to reuse my clothes and change my aesthetic 🦾

Im so sorry this is all over the place, I just got home from work and I’m wicked tired- thank u for reading and have a good day or night 🦾🦾

AHHH OMG THANK YOU FOR THE REQUEST I GOTCHU BESTIE (the way i related to half of this so much help) REQUESTS ARE ALWAYS OKAY AND ITS VERY NICE TO MEET YOU TOO okay lemme tell you my first thought and then i started building on that..

i match you with... *badabadaba drum roll pls* SATAN

okay so one, he would love your username (so do i LMAO). with the amount of reading satan does, i totally hc that he reads romance and drama and stuff like shakespeare so he would TOTALLY BE A SIMP FOR YOU AND YOUR ACTING BBY. he'd love your musical side to the MAX. i'm talking like will literally go to your room (would buy you a guitar) bring said guitar, and ask you to play something for him. we all know he's a needy cat bby.

(i'm totally gonna be all over the place w this request sorry).

HE LOVES YOUR HEIGHT THO LIKE JAHSHSJS THATS A WHOLE FOOT DIFFERENCE. love your style and would so be down to dye your hair whenever. let's be honest you'd need to help him with his style which ends up with you two looking like the ULTIMATE POWER COUPLE

you guys would be so c u t e i cant this man would literally do anything for you- i feel like a big chunk of the reason being your personalities mesh so well ?? i have the same personality type as satan and i have a t o n of infp people i get along with and i feel like it would be the same w him and you. he would v much appreciate your social aspect because he doesn't like people lmao. and he would find your stuttering SO CUTE AHH. all the sex jokes you make would fluster THE SHIT out of him. he would hide his blushing face in a book as you sit there with a smug look on your face LOL.

bby would totally help you with your self confidence and you two would grow together (bc we all know he's trying so hard to work on himself too we love that) and you guys would cuddle for emotional support i feel like.

totally would get you fidget stuff and is supportive of you 100%

he would also leave you love letters/notes and give you books with annotations of things that remind him of you

expect for cat boy to be completely and hopelessly in love with you and you two would match so WELL AJSJJS

(i had to throw this in but)

STUDY DATES AND COZY NIGHTS IN WINTER GRUNGE AESTHETIC VIBE AHH

pls let him try on your glasses

overall yall are SO CUTE

SORRY IF THIS WAS TOO MUCH TO READ IK HOW ADHD CAN BE I HAVE IT TOO BESTIE AND IF YOU EVER WANNA TALK ABT ANYTHING DONT BE SHY TO DM ME AND WE CAN TALK ILY BBY THANK YOU FOR THE REQUEST I HOPE YOU LIKED IT

-cas :)

[impossible-rat-babies]

If I can still ask, can we have a few samples of the lines that need to be reused?

totally! there’s only a few in there right now lol it’s my dumping ground for little lingering paragraphs at the end of fics after i’ve finished them:

“You want a whole cork board of vile plans, or an evil experiments station?” Pollux scoffs, but it’s hardly a joke.

“Is there yarn connecting the evil plans?” Ortega asks and Pollux grimaces, crossing his arms over his chest.

“Yes. It’s orange and the papers are all about making a safe new life for myself where I won’t have to look over my shoulder and wonder when I’m going to be dragged back to a literal hell on earth. All terribly evil shenanigans.” Pollux shoots from the hip with biting words and Ortega cringes.

“Sorry...”

--

Trial and error until they figured out how to sleep together —several nights where one or the other was ushered off to the gues room or the couch. Half a dozen times where Ortega would get kicked in the ribs, or Pollux would wake in a sweaty start, too unsettled and jumpy to fall back asleep.

Pollux actually sleeps through the night without a nightmares most of the time now, only a few stray occasions where it’s not enough. It’s better than before—leagues better.

--

“Didn’t think I’d do it either, but when you’re a recovering drug addict, you’re kinda unceremoniously pushed into it.” He admits and Nat pauses, her silver rings no longer clicking as she pauses drumming her fingers on the counter. He watches the question bubble up and die before they reach her lips, brown eyes finally looking up at him.

“I-I’m sorry, Pollux, I didn’t mean—“

“Don’t...” He cuts her off with a wave of his hand, putting a thin smile on his lips. “It’s fine, really. I shouldn’t have said it so crassly, I apologize.” He picks his lip with his thumbnail.

Nat glances down and she shakes her head, taking a deep breath and letting it out. “You shouldn’t apologize either. I didn’t mean to pry.”

“You would’ve found out regardless, one way or another. I’d rather you hear it from me.” He tells her with that same tense smile, scratching his thumb against his chin and the sparse hairs there from not shaving for a few days. Nat slowly nods, looking back down at the book, eyes scanning across the pages, finding other dates like the one from before scattered about the month.

“It was during college...” He speaks again, his back now turned to her as he fusses about the stove once more, the smell of fresh tomato and herb reaching her nose. “I wasn’t well for a long time before that—college certainly didn’t help. Partying lead to alcohol, which lead to...other things. I just wanted to turn my brain off for a bit, stop all the,” He twirls his fingers around his head like mining gears spinning, “stuff in my head.”

He sighs and Nat waits, waits for him to stop or continue, still in her seat at the bar.

“It got bad. Ended up in places and people I shouldn’t have been with. They got me into a lot of trouble.” Pollux chews his lip and he turns back to face Nat. Grey eyes looking over her shoulder at something she can’t see, like a memory playing on repeat in front of his eyes.

“Woke up one morning, in a dumpster of all places, with Mum bawling her eyes out.” His lips thin until their lost against his pale skin, his freckled cheeks and he crosses his arms over his chest, shoulders hunching.

--

“At four am? Breaking a mirror?” There’s annoyance poking into his tone as he gestures back to the sad broken mirror, chunks still dropping to the wood floor like punctuation in the silence. Felix’s brow draws in as they dance around things Pollux won’t say.

“I couldn’t sleep and this tires me out.”

Pollux provides, refusing to spare a glance anywhere but at the ground. He still catches as Felix’s posture tenses and Pollux clamps his mouth shut, biting the inside of his cheek. He’s digging himself into the ground now and he knows it.

“You don’t have to lie to me, Pollux...” Felix speaks quietly, a quiet little ache behind his words, enough to pull on the aching under his ribcage, draw his eyes to look him. Felix meets his eyes and there’s a silent plea there, a glow in his amber eyes begging him to tell him the truth.

“It’s not...” Pollux starts and trails off, catching his teeth on his lower lip to keep him from trembling. “I just...don’t wanna talk about it. I can’t talk about it.” He finally whispers, eyes fixed on the ground, bare feet staring back up at him.

He could shout out every single deep seated, rage filled memory stuck behind his eyes--stuck between his teeth--and make it all feel better. Maybe it wouldn’t feel like drowning in his own lungs, or feel like scratching his own skin off when the dreams crawl under his skin, burrowing down deep. But he can hardly admit that it hurts, pain that sitting in his skull and it closes around his throat, choking the words out of him until they’re a strangled jumbled mess. Even now the hand clenches around his neck, keeping it locked away tight.

--

“You don’t have to not touch them....” Pollux says softly, quietly. He doesn’t look up at Ortega, feeling his eyes on him instead. “You’ve already done it.” He glances at his still bare arm and further down across his stomach. Orange lines spiraling from the barcode out, still shiny and slick as ever.

“I know.” Ortega says softly and Pollux looks up, finding his eyes on the same spot on his arms. Pollux doesn’t flinch as his eyes wander up his arm and down his chest. It’s different than any other look someone has had for his body—examining yes, but for different reasons.

Pollux wonders to himself exactly what he imagined under his clothes before this, if it was always picture perfect skin. Were their scars? Terrible markings of self conducted surgery, the hurt he’d been through? Was this the body he expected wrapped up under layers of clothing and secrets?

“What did you expect to find?” He speaks before he can stop himself, words running out in a rush of breath. Ortega’s eyes snap to his and he has the decency to look guilty for having been staring.

Better than everyone else before that’s seen them.

“Well...” Ortega half chuckles, staring off at a point just above his head. “Beyond the obvious, I don’t know...I mean, I knew you had...” He waves his hand around and Pollux chuckles a bit, glancing down at his chest.

“Yeah I get it.” A smile pulls at the corner of his lip.

Ortega nods. “But...I don’t know what I expected. Not this, but who does?”

Pollux looks up at him and his brow is scrunched together, confusion plain on his face, mouth trying and failing to the words he wants. Like he’s still not sure what this means for him--what any of it means. Navigating the new--secrets kept for a decade now breathing in the space between them.

“I don’t hate it.” He almost reaches out, fingers almost touching his shoulder and Pollux doesn’t pull away, lets his hand hover, an almost touch.

Pollux catches his hand. Soft, the faint static of the emitter against his palm, narrow wires under the skin. Splaying his fingers and he presses them against his chest, above the hollow where his heart sits. Hand warm against his cold skin, a pleasant feeling as it spreads out across his skin, across the tattoos. Ortega doesn’t pull his hand away, his fingers lingering and his thumb brushes against a swath of tattoos.

“I expected them to feel different...” Ortega mumbles and Pollux shrugs, lips pursing into a thin line

“I don’t hate you Pollux.” He says softly.

[dontasktheradiodemon]

❌ OKAY, we got distracted during the intermission—wild animal got in, don’t worry about it, hotel’s fine—but we finally got through the whole show. So, here it is, by popular request, after like FOUR MONTHS of trying to track down this show:

🎵 Alastor gives his opinion on Hamilton 🎵

❌ So I didn’t type out EVERY ONE of Alastor’s reactions, since half of them were just humming along whenever a song used a motif from an earlier song or laughing at the jokes. A lot of the songs I didn’t type anything for. Message him if you’re desperate to know how he feels about your fave. Or if you want to listen to him ramble more about one of the songs, I’m SURE he has more to say, this is just as much as he could squeeze out around, y’know, actually watching the show. But I’m not typing more for him, I’ve done my duty.

❌ He says his favorites were “Helpless,” “Wait For It,” “History Has Its Eyes on You,” “What’d I Miss,” “Room Where It Happens,” “Burn,” “Your Obedient Servant,” and “every single time Lafayette opens his mouth.”

“Alexander Hamilton”

🎶 “There’s not a lot of singing in this song, is there? It’s more like poetry.”

❌ And right after that they switched from rapping to singing, lol. He didn’t say much past that, though—he went quiet pretty quick. Trying to keep up with the lyrics probably. (I’m already missing lines. I don’t care, I’m gonna watch it again with Charlie.)

“Aaron Burr, Sir”

🎶 “Oh, that’s French!”

🎶 “Now, I could be mistaken, but I’m fairly certain that all these gentlemen were white. This is an improvement!”

“The Schuyler Sisters”

❌ He raised an imaginary glass to the first couple lines of the song. I mean he’s not wrong.

🎶 “So does the entire show consist of patter songs? Interesting.”

❌ I had to look it up, a patter song is basically a tongue-twister song with really fast lyrics. They happen in comedy operas and stuff. I think he’s talking about the rap. I think he thinks that rap is just a kind of patter song.

🎶 “I bet this played well in New York.

“Farmer Refuted”

🎶 “This is one of the songs that got recommended to me. I don’t know why. The earlier songs were much more intriguing. This one’s clever enough, but not a stand-out.

“You’ll Be Back”

❌ We got an ask about this one so I elbowed him to pay attention. I probably didn’t need to, he spent half of it laughing.

🎶 “Oh, would you... just—look at that complete lack of dancing. He’s a wax statue. Look at him.”

❌ I said “I love his lack of energy. Go king, give us nothing,” and Alastor slid off the couch laughing, so none of you are allowed to tell him I quoted a meme.

“Right Hand Man”

🎶 “I wish they’d sing more rather than just recite. And I’m not a fan of all the... synthetic beatboxing.”

❌ I think he means the hip hop beats. How does he know what beatboxing is but not hip hop?

🎶 “Oh! ‘Modern Major General’ reference!”

“Helpless”

❌ He spent most of this one sorta bopping along. I think this might be the first song he’s genuinely had fun with. The king being energyless aside.

🎶 “Do you think they have a real electric organ hidden somewhere, or is prerecorded? No, wait, I think live musicians are still legally mandatory at Broadway show, aren’t they?”

❌ I didn’t even hear the organ. Does Broadway really have a law about live music??

“Satisfied”

🎶 “All right. I’m sold.”

“Guns and Ships”

🎶 “This is another of the ones I was sent. It flows better now, hearing it after all the other songs in the same style. Good Lord, he really is fast, isn’t he!”

“Yorktown (The World Turned Upside Down)”

❌ I sorta cheered at the line about immigrants and Alastor laughed at me.

🎶 “More battle scenes need to be danced.”

“Dear Theodosia”

🎶 “The war’s already over? Goodness, this show is moving fast.”

“Non-Stop”

🎶 “This is another one I was sent. I think there’s one more?”

🎶 “Too beatbox-y.”

🎶 “The turning stage is clever! That’s fine staging.”

🎶 “When I first heard this one I thought it was a bit disjointed, I suspected it was reusing themes from earlier in the show. I was right! And I was right that it was the act one finale! Do I know Broadway or do I know Broadway?”

❌ (And during intermission Alastor went to get a snack and that’s when the wild animal got in and distracted us for two hours. ... In retrospect, maybe the animal was supposed to be his snack.)

“What'd I Miss?”

🎶 “This! This is my favorite song so far!”

🎶 “And my favorite coat so far! Look at him!”

❌ Context: Jefferson is wearing a long red coat. Surprise.

🎶 “Listen to this! This is fun! This is jazzy! I even hear a walking bass in there!” (I have no idea what that means.) “Oh, I hope this fellow sticks around! Jefferson buys Louisiana, he’s got to be important to the show, right? They’ll keep him arou—Hold everything, is that Lafayette?!”

❌ I looked it up. Yep, Jefferson is the same performer as Lafayette.

🎶 “When tryouts open in Hell, I’m calling dibs on playing him.”

“Cabinet Battle #1”

🎶 “Never mind, I’m not playing him. That's not my performing style. I can’t do that.”

“Say No to This”

🎶 “Can't relate!”

“Room Where It Happens”

🎶 “This is the last song I was sent.”

🎶 “I don’t even remember this fellow from history. Do you remember him? I’d have forgotten his name by now if Hamilton didn’t keep calling him Burr, Sir.”

🎶 “This one’s fantastic when he gets into it. It still reminds me of ‘Heaven on Their Minds’—one of the good versions, the shouty ones—do you hear what I mean?”

❌ I do not hear what he means. I do not know what he’s talking about.

🎶 “There’s quite a bit going on in this one, isn’t there! Oh, you can hear Jefferson crawling all over this song. I enjoy the Hell out of his sound. All the banjo and ragtime and spirituals and jazz—old school jazz, too, the real stuff—God, this is a good one! I’ll have to listen to the whole show again to pick out the other characters’ musical motifs, Jefferson’s style is easy to pick out because—hah, well, it’s practically the same as my style, isn’t it?”

❌ He kept talking about “Room Where It Happens” halfway into the next song.

“Cabinet Battle #2”

🎶 “Hm... no. No, definitely not my performing style. It's less a patter song and more... spoken word poetry. Isn’t it?”

“Washington On Your Side”

🎶 “... But it COULD be done as a patter song, couldn't it? I could MAKE it my performing style...”

“I Know Him”

🎶 “Bless these lifeless interludes from King George."

"The Adams Administration"

🎶 “Creole WHAT?! Excuse me?! Oh, that better not be a historical quote. Did he go to Hell, is he in Hell?”

❌ If the answer is “yes,” I’m pretty sure Alastor is lowkey planning to hunt him down and spit in his face. Or eat him? IDK, hard to guess with him.

"Burn"

🎶 "This is one of the more Broadway ones, I like this."

“It's Quiet Uptown”

🎶 “Oh, this won't play well in Hell.”

“Your Obedient Servant”

🎶 “Why, when the singing is good, is the background music so annoying?”

❌ It took him like a minute to decide:

🎶 “It's the drum kit.”

❌ He says that, but he’s drumming his fingers in time to the song.

“Who Lives, Who Dies, Who Tells Your Story”

🎶 “They really gave Eliza the best parts, didn’t they?”

❌ Aaand that’s it, we’re done!

❌ But he’s got that “I want to keep talking and Lucifer himself couldn’t shut me up” look he gets sometimes, so uh, feel free to ask him follow-up questions and spare me from having to fend off his chatter.

[genuflectx]

4th Dimensional Being/OC - CH1

Full Length: 19,543

Chapter Length:  4,248

Main Themes: Other dimensions, tentacles, confinement, nsfw

Other Warnings: politics, "godly" behaviors, vomit, feeling of loss of autonomy, comparison to a toy

(all images in aesthetic board are labeled for reuse with modification or are mine)

I ended writing a novella... this is my longest short, non-fanfic work yet. It's not perfect but was a fun exploration of these characters and themes. Yes, there will be explicit sex in a later chapter :) Later on I will format the novella correctly for a nice little Gumroad/Patron release! Enjoy! (WILL BE NSFW IN LATER CHAPTERS)

The 4DB Chapter 1: Heartburn

“Do you need any stamps?”

The middle-aged woman re-set her teeth subconsciously and rose a brow. “No, I just came to drop off the package.” Her eyes crinkled in a way that passive aggressively said 'get on with it.'

Chris pursed her lips, features big and round with false politeness. “Okay then! If you could just insert your card-”

“Is it one that takes chips?” She interrupted.

“Yes, it's ready for you.”

The mail room was a quiet murmur as the card clacked against the plastic scanner. Eventually it happened to slipped in. “It's not doing anything.”

“You might have it in the wrong way ma'am,” Chris suggested, tense.

The woman squinted, a corner of her mouth raising in distaste. She ripped the card from its slot and turned it around. The machine asked her pin. She got it right on the third try. Finally, the package could be put in its place as the lady left with a stick up her ass.

“Some customers are just the worst,” Chris concluded as she and two of her co-workers were closing shop.

Vincent shrugged. “They just like to take out their anger on strangers to make'em feel better,” he smiled and locked the door.

Mildred chuckled and rolled her eyes, patting Chris on the shoulder. “Make sure none of them hear you talking like that!” She started to walk to her car. “I been here for a decade. You'll get used to them.”

“Well I been here a year, I ought to be too!” Chris groaned, slumping dramatically where she stood.

“Just get some rest, tomorrow's the big event!” Vincent grinned and pranced off to his own car.

Chris found her feet dragging on, her hand fumbling for keys. “Yeah yeah, see you there,” she mumbled, climbing on in with exhaustion.

She was never much of a people-pleaser, but she did her job alright. After a long exasperating work week the weekend was blessedly encroaching upon her, right along side the annual downtown gathering of Gabriel's Children. Chris was not one of those children. However, Vincent had been since the horn had first begun to blow. Chris did have to admit it was an astounding scientific phenomenon, but that's all it was. Just something science had yet to explain. The little festival the locals vended had delicious food, though. Hearing the horn was a fun little bonus.

The festivities started early in the morning and she arrived with Vincent in the afternoon. There was a talk being held at its center, which Vincent felt the need to drag her to hear after gathering snacks. They nibbled on freshly baked pastries and sipped hot coffee as a man high on the stage explained recent discoveries of the hum- another word for the horn. Chris thought maybe they'd come in a little late, as the man was already beginning to finish off his speech. Plus, it was hard to hear with the bustling of the surrounding crowd; all the people laughing and chatting and cooking at their stands, necklaces jingling and children begging parents for magnets of trumpets and angels. She strained her ears to listen.

“So if it wasn't the factory, if we are inland unlike the Children of Europe, we have no buzzing wind farms nor major fault lines, then what is it? What is the 'horn?'” He stalked across the stage, pacing and looking so, so serious. “Twenty years and we have no answers. But we know it's sped up. We know it's moved and honed in to few locations; from our little mid-American town, to Washington D.C., all the way down to the hot, dry climates of Texas.”

Chris sighed and slid further in her chair, looking bored. “We've heard all this before. They haven't learned anything new in years,” she whispered across to her excited co-worker. Vincent shushed her and she resisted a bored moan.

The speaker was unaffected, totally unaware of a particular audience member's dry indifference. “Every year now it comes, and every year we gather again to try and learn something. Anything,” he frowned.

Chris crammed cinnamon role into her gob and huffed quietly. “Good luck.” She washed it down with a big swig of coffee.

Vincent gave her a look that could melt the bones right out of her body. She smirked at him.

“Maybe this year... things will be different,” the speaker trailed off quietly and quit pacing. He became eerily still, looking out over the heads of the crowd and into the mottled stone walls of downtown. Vincent felt that he was pausing for dramatic effect, but Chris rose a brow. He'd stopped speaking, almost wall eyed.

“Shit,” Chris suddenly whispered, bringing fingers to her temples and shutting her eyes.

“You okay?” Vincent worried, glancing from her to the stage with a sense of terrible unease.

She grit her teeth and shut her eyes. Her ears were ringing, one even popped. A few seconds passed. It slowly subsided into a dull pain. “Just a weird headache? Guess it's all the noise,” she dropped her hands, exhaling.

“Guess he got one too?” Vincent gestured uncomfortably.

She followed his hand up to the stage, where the speaker was continuing to pause. By now it had just become awkward; his palm on his forehead and a pained expression encased his wrinkled visage. The crowd had begun to murmur in confusion. Slowly he swallowed, like forcing down vomit, then became relieved enough to continue.

“That's... that's all. Thank you for coming to listen to me speak,” he shuffled away to the shallow stairs and disappeared, making way for the next speaker.

“Weird,” Chris mumbled. “Maybe air pressure then? Well come on, I want to look at some shops before the countdown reaches zero.”

He jumped up enthusiastically, all starry eyed. “Yeah! I want a new key chain!”

As they carefully navigated the crowd back to the local art shops, Chris shook her head and laughed. “Don't you already have like, six trumpets?” She scolded.

He scoffed and waved a hand. “Pch, sure, but they're all different!”

An hour to go. They browsed, they made small talk, they sat stiff on freezing metal benches outside of local junk shops. Vincent not only snatched up a key chain but a copy of a screen print as well. He turned it upside down and squinted, humming. It was some abstract piece. Flat shapes seemed to wiggle around at him in a colorful confusion.

“Why don't you buy anything?” He asked, tuning the print right side up again.

She shrugged, chilled hands in warming pockets. “I'm not a tourist like you.”

“Heeey, I resent that!” He joked, trying to hide a smile.

Suddenly Chris winched, putting a hand at the nape of her neck. There it was again, that creeping feeling of a splitting headache coming back. She sighed and slowed her pace, feeling nauseous.

“Listen, I think I'm gonna head home.”

Her friend expressed disappointment. “What! It's only fifteen minutes now! Really want to miss Gabriel?”

She nodded, rubbing her neck and looking down. “Yeah, I really feel icky. Besides, I'll probably still hear it in my car if I roll the windows down. I think the crowd and air pressure are just overwhelming me.” Chris did hate to leave her friend to himself, but he was a big boy, even if he was two years younger. She just didn't feel up to staying any longer.

He pretended to pout and waved her goodbye. “See ya at work Monday,” he called across the loud, mingling voices of the festival.

Chris waved back and found her way through downtown, back out into the more empty streets. She pressed a red button. The streetlight sounded and the image turned white so she crossed swiftly on numbed feet. She made it up the car park elevator, found her car among the dimly lit concrete slopes, and finally was on her way home. The headache had yet to return during the trip so she counted herself lucky.

The roads were relatively empty due to the majority of traffic having already settled in to wait for Gabriel's horn, though a few roads were annoyingly blocked off for the event. She was deathly glad for the vacant roads that allowed her to slip out of downtown with an ease she'd not get to enjoy any other day.

“Oh right,” Chris rolled down her side window. Fresh cold air flowed in, which soothed her head a little. “Not long now.”

She was just about out of downtown when it happened. But... there was no horn. No rusty screech, no hum that she'd grown to know so well. However, there was an awful, unaccounted for noise that came from the rolling Heavens. A sharp, quick sound; a hard whispered word blasted her brain and set it on fire. It hurt like Hell. Like the loud screech of white noise when one had forgotten to turn the volume down before pressing 'on.' Chris slammed her breaks and cried, her wheels screaming. Was that what Vincent heard, waiting patiently back in the crowd? Or was it just in her head?

Chris pressed the gas gently, teeth grit and eyes barely open. She veered into an empty parking lot and stopped askew over two spaces. She yanked her hair and pressed her forehead against the wheel then suddenly felt extremely sick. She fumbled for the door then stumbled out. Chris felt pressure and collapsed clumsily to her knees against the broken asphalt. After a few moments some of the pressure let up, but then she heard that word again.

“What's wrong with me?” She slurred, feeling dizzy.

A look around found that she was very much alone. There was nothing but empty parked cars. The pain was suddenly gone. She froze and took a deep breath, her eyes re-focusing and hands shaking. She needed to go to the hospital but did not want to pay for the ambulance. Vincent could drive her. Her hand slowly retrieved the phone from her pocket, but as she pressed the button to find Vincent's contact she heard the word one last time. Sharp, quick, just like the first, but it was more clear.

“Wh-what? I'm hallucinating,” She mumbled, knowing full well that that was not the sound of Gabriel's horn.

“Chrysanthemum,” a loud-quiet voice called out in her head.

“Shit!” She dropped her phone and watched it smack against the faded asphalt.

“Chrysanthemum, don't be afraid. You are not hallucinating. The pain you felt was an... accident,” it explained, lowering its voice.

“God?” Chris called, slipping onto her butt and staring with fear into the sky. She was shaking from head to toe now.

It made a weird sound. “No, we are not a god, though we may seem it to you. We are the noise you call 'Gabriel's Horn,' but we are neither Gabriel nor Horn. The 'Horn' you've heard was merely our days affecting your years as we... tuned equipment,” Not-Gabriel explained plainly.

She glanced from cloud to cloud, brows furrowed so hard her forehead hurt. For a moment she thought if she just searched long enough she'd be able to find the face that was talking down on her.

“It will be difficult for you to understand and will take many of your days to acclimate. Do you at least understand this Chrysanthemum?” It sounded condescending at the end.

Chris scowled. “Well you can't be God if you keep using a name I don't go by,” she complained.

“We are of the 4th dimension. We are not a god. Here. I will touch your insides, it may feel strange,” it warned. “See?”

She screamed and grabbed her stomach. It felt like her acid churned, and suddenly she had heart burn. Chris burped and felt woozy. “That's... ohhh I think mm gonna pahhh-” Chris collapsed heavily to her back, unconscious.

There was nothing, nothing, nothing, then there was something. She saw herself amid a void. It was like a thick goo, as if the gas or lack of gas in the air had solidified. There was no cold nor heat, no apparent up nor down. But then, as she turned her head towards her feet, there was an illumination that lit the ground beneath her. A flat plain decorated with complex, ornate geometry rested below. She squatted against her calves, though it felt years before she came to a halt, and with every tiny change in posture she saw a ghost of her former self.

“Hello?” She called, echoing into the void. Her word simultaneously stuck in the goo and penetrated its atoms all at once. This world was a contradiction.

Something small screamed, a high-pitched trill of terror and shock. Chris glanced down at the geometry and squinted. The geometry was moving; it shivered and vibrated like cells in a body. It was all scrambling so fast compared to her.

“Hello?” She asked again, balancing with a hand so she may come closer.

It screamed again. A tiny little organism wriggled backwards, and across the plain something tickled Chris's hand. She lifted it and gawked with disgust and horror. She'd squished something, and it lay in bits in pieces.

“Whoops, I think I broke something,” she admitted sheepishly.

“Don't smite me!” Squeaked the thing by her feet.

Chris frowned. “What are you? You're so small and... flat.”

It rotated and looked around, but it never once looked up into the sky. The creature could not see anything but the outline of her shoes where she'd stepped atop its planet.

“You don't know?” It asked, sounding only slightly less panicked. “Then you're not God? Are you from Somewhere Else?”

She shook her head, confused. “No, I'm not a god. I'm Chris. And you're a cell?”

“A cell?”

“Yeah, a small organism that can group up to become a bigger organism. I'm full of them. You look like all the diagrams we used in school. But you can talk and I can see your insides. Which is the mitochondria?” She scrutinized the inside of the creature's body. It was sorta gross.

The flat creature's brain was working hard as it stared at the funny outline of Chris's shoes. She could even see it working. It nervously moved around her shape, making a full circle to get a whole picture.

“You're gigantic, please don't hurt me Chris. What do you want?”

“I don't- woah!” She began to sink. The illuminated plain was caving to her weight, but only she passed through. The plain itself remained as flat as ever. “I'm gonna fall!”

The creature's panic sky rocketed as it watched the line gyrate and change, growing larger and longer. “Ahhh!” It yelled, backing into a corner. If Chris continued to grow it would have no way of escape and be crushed against the side of a wall. “What's happening? What's wrong?”

She slipped further. Now it was Chris who was in a panic, scared of the endless black void below the flat planet. She sunk through to her elbows, leaving her to sprawl her arms and claw at the ground for purchase. Across the world her fingers scraped through a once wondrous shape, which crumpled and splintered as she accidentally destroyed its existence.

“I'm sorry! I'm sorry!” She freaked out, heart beating like on a roller coaster. Chris fell.

She gasped, her skin clammy and damp. Everything was too bright and she shielded her eyes.

“You're awake, good. Here,” a man said.

Chris sat up and exhaled, her eyes adjusting. She was in a stranger's house and was being handed a glass of cold water, though the ice inside had since melted. The flat planet was a dream. She had not really scraped a building from the face of a world. As she took the water, her hands shaking, she realized something.

“...You look familiar. Where am I?” She fretted, sipping a little.

He sat across from her in a chair. “What's the last thing you remember?” He asked rather than answer.

She crossed her legs atop the couch and dabbed sweat off with her sleeve. It took some brain power to get any semblance of memory going. “I had some sort of weird... episode. Then I passed out in a parking lot. I think I need a hospital,” Chris groaned.

He grinned. “So you did hear it?”

“What?”

“You heard it? The thing that says its from another dimension?” He was star-struck.

Chris stared down into her cup, thinking. Flashes came back to her until finally she remembered everything, right down to the nausea. A chill came over her body so she sat the cold water down. “It wasn't a hallucination.”

“No it wasn't!” He exclaimed, shivering with excitement. “It spoke to me too! It told me where to find you since you fell unconscious! But we aren't the only ones. It spoke to even more.”

She quirked the corner of her lips and let that information sink in. Suddenly something came to her and she tilted her head curiously. “You're that man from the stage.”

“Call me Cole,” he scooted closer and stuck out a hand.

Chris hesitated, unsure. “Chris.” She shook his hand daintily.

He explained everything. The headache, the ringing in his ears, how he'd been packing up his laptop to leave backstage when the countdown hit zero. To everyone else it had been a disappointment, for this year the horn did not hum to the eager ears awaiting it. Instead, it narrowed down its focus and spoke to them. Chris and Cole, but others, too.

“It told me there were six others. That includes you. So outside of us there are five other people it spoke to directly,” he explained.

“But... why? Just seven people?”

He leaned back in his chair and shrugged, nonchalant. “I asked, after the initial shock and having dropped my laptop (may she rest in peace). It just said: you work for your government.”

Chris looked off, expression soured. It was true. The Postal Service was a branch of the government, but she hardly equated government with the mail.

“What do you do?” She asked him nervously.

“Department of Energy.”

Chris got the creeping notion that his house was vaguely radioactive. Or, at the very least, he was. “Great.” She stretched her legs over the couch's edge and stared at her shoes awkwardly. “So now what?”

“We wait to be called upon,” he answered simply. “I'll go start some tea,” and like that Cole was out the room.

So they waited and waited. Chris thumbed through books as she did, glancing at Cole's collection and idly sipping tea. Sometimes she'd get the fear that he was making it all up, that this was all a scheme to kidnap her without freaking her out. Or that maybe he was just some guy screwing with her head. But then her stomach would churn and she'd remember how it felt to be touched. Chris felt queasy. At the same time she couldn't help but feel... honored? It was strange. This was all so new to her.

Finally it came to them. This time there was no pain, no headaches or heartburn. Cole fell to his knees as soon as the creature spoke, but Chris just sank shakily back into couch, empty teacup in hand.

“You will be transported to a location for study,” it said.

Cole nodded his head and agreed instantly, but Chris found herself asking it: “Why? And where?”

“Why: a 'mutual' exchange of information in a controlled environment. Where: the center of your 'country' in a long-term observation facility.”

She balked. “For how long?” But Cole spoke over her.

“That's brilliant! Brilliant! Have you spoke to the president? Surely you have,” he clasped his hands together and smiled.

“...Yes. Unfortunately. Some deep convincing was needed to induce submission,” it replied with obvious irritation.

Chris was uncomfortable and suspicious of the wording, though she was not surprised the president was a nuisance to converse with. The creature assured them there would be at least a day or two before anyone came for collection, so they had some time to prepare. Cole questioned why this creature could not simply pick them up and plop them back down, but it was uncertain that such action would be healthy. So again they played a waiting game.

Chris went back to her house. Cole stayed in his. Sunday dawned upon the world and there was no one yet at their doors. Chris paced uneasily in her little home, her suitcases already packed in the living room. She didn't know what to do with herself. Couldn't even stomach trying to explain anything to Vincent or Mildred. Hell, did she even want to leave? She was sure she had no choice.

Finally, come Monday morning, there was a knock at her door. She jumped from bed and scrambled to answer, a measly robe tossed across her shoulders. A stoic man dressed in all black was there to greet her, his eyes unreadable though they crinkled. She could sense some strange dread in him from his hard posture alone. Only the automatic light of her porch lit their way as this stranger led her to the car.

Cole was there, his white teeth gleaming at her as she boarded. Despite his cheer, Chris felt like she was in a daze the entire time. Her hands settled frozen in her lap and eyes glued to the window. She watched her little town pass her by just as the night drifted to day. The ugly office building next to the apartments, the fenced off government buildings. There went the post office. She sighed.

Where are you? Vincent texted Chris when they were already hours from town.

Her thumbs hovered sleepily over the keys. She didn't know what to say. Eventually she just settled for:

It's been a long weekend. I don't know when I'll be able to come in again. Something's happened

…

…

…

Are you sick?

Don't know what I'm allowed to say. I'll text later. Xoxo

Well that's not totally vague but ok

…

…

Tell me if u need soup fam

Chris smiled at her phone. She really hoped this didn't cause her to lose her job, even if it was something way more pressing than delivering mail. She'd miss her co-workers the most. Even Mildred. With any luck the 'long-term' in 'long-term research facility' wouldn't be any more long-term than a vacation.

The driver drove non-stop, through the night and the day, across interstates and through small cities. It was unnerving. Cole whispered that he was sure the creature was to blame, even though it hadn't spoken the whole trip.

“It's fascinating,” he whispered.

Chris hummed and faked a smile in acknowledgment before staring back out the window. All she could think was what a weird vacation before she found herself nodding off.

“We've arrived,” the driver announced as sudden as summer rain.

Chris jerked, her stinging eyes glued in confusion to the dim window. They were inside of a painfully lit parking garage and there were droves of black-suits and white-coats to greet them. She must have fallen asleep for some time.

“Thank you,” she heard Cole dully as his door was opened for him. Her door was next.

“Have you been in contact?” Asked a man sternly, no trace of emotion in his voice.

She furrowed her brows. “What?”

He didn't miss a beat. “With the 4DB?”

Both she and her jittery acquaintance were being led away through the garage. Someone gently guided her through a door with a palm against her back.

“The... the Four Dee Bee?”

The man re-adjusted the wireless device in his ear, lips crinkling. “The Fourth Dimensional Being.”

Chris began to sweat and tried to explain. “Not since before we were told we'd be sent here, but-”

A woman patted her shoulder nonchalantly and shook her head. “Can't even wait till she's in the room huh?” She teased her co-worker, her heels clicking against the hall tile. “We're just eager, don't be afraid! You and Mr. Artrip will speak with a scientist and be briefed before joining the others. This was all very sudden so don't mind the dust bunnies.”

Chris nodded quietly, glancing ahead to get a glimpse of Cole- Mr. Artrip. This was all so weird and she felt she had some sort of jet lag. She wondered when she'd be allowed to talk with the creature again. It had been a few days now.

“And then after everyone's settled it's about meal time! But first,” she carefully pushed Chris into a dimly lit room, had a quick word with her co-worker, then silently shut the door. “Have a seat.”

She did as she was told. Chris sat before a small wooden table, as if this was meant to make the room more inviting than it really was. It just made her feel interrogated. Or like she'd been called to the principal’s office.

The woman took a seat across from her and peeked into a thin file. After a short pause she looked up, smiled, and said. “Chrysanthemum Sain... tell me everything.”

Read CH2 early on Patreon or wait for it to go public!