#You ready?

[jaycee-es]

in celebration of the welcome home website reviving I made this <33333

(fair warning it can get a little loud)

[idontlikethecolorred]

bout 2 pee on u

[aquamarineglow]

It's a miracle that I've had this blog nearly ten years, and never ran out of Rook and Bishop content to make. Amazing.

Hypothetically of course. We know their fights are exclusively verbal.

[boanerges20]

You Ready?...

[cinamun]

before we tap in on the new ep: its 100% dj's fault because you break up with somebody and 24 hours later you getting head? you didnt respect amaya in the first place. give it a week or two WHORE! if you really was a bout it dj you should of been begging on your knees when she was packing up! amaya you dont need a nigga who has DeezNuts as his username past middle school. also i'd love to see how amayas dad handles this hehe 😈

Listen his username is off limits, ok friend? LMFAOOOO lbvs!! Everything else is on point though.

Also why could I hear "WHORE!!"?? Istg! OK OK! Yes, like someone else said, he isn't crying and throwing up enough for us. Like.... why is he still standing up right here? I just...

when we interviewed the couch, the couch said he was crying so idk...

As far as her daddy friend, I think her dad would talk to DJs dad because thems is grown mens... *crosses legs* and they know how to handle DJ. They'd probably take his ass on a fishing trip or something, expose him to some bears and survivalist shit. DJ gone come back a new man. Talking about call him Darren the Second, he left DJ behind him.

chile.....

[urmingirl]

[inklessletter]

The urge to know what you’re posting tonight is so strong, I am not planning on sleeping to see it. It is currently 23.27 in my time zone and this might mean I don’t get to sleep at all this night. Please. I beg you. What is it? Give us a clueeee

Three minutes 👀

[dailysylvainjosegautier]

New Sylvain!

[girlsngossip]

@dbldipper

tiffany didn't know what she was doing.

what the FUCK was she doing??

the blonde didn't have any sort of game plan, all she had learned about dipper from the blog is he lingered in the diner and the museum.... and that he was weird. that was about as extensive as her knowledge went.

she tried her luck at the museum but he had just gotten off, apparently, so she got on her bike and took the longest route possible to the diner, talking herself through a potential game plan. she was a pretty blonde, a rich and pretty blonde with a motorcycle— one of the most well known racers of their generation. maybe the best way to get to dipper was ... well, through his pants. not that she would go as low as to FUCK him, men repulsed her, but… appealing to him in that manner might be her only chance.

she winced at the thought, smacking the heel of her hand against the handles of her bike, audibly groaning as she pulled into the diner parking lot. she pulled off her helmet, glaring at the building, as if she could somehow do what bill did and... make it something else. this is what it has come too, tiffany. talk about a SELL OUT.

after collecting herself, she took a deep breath and walked into the diner, chin high; feigning confidence, something she knew for a fact she was good at. she spotted him almost immediately, working on... something. tossing her hair over her shoulder and pushing her weight in his direction, she tried to find some grounding affirmations for herself. think of your future. think of everything you are doing this for tiffany.

❛ excuse me, ❜ tiff greeted, feigning innocence, leaning her weight on the side of the booth and giving him her most charming smile; ❛ mind if i sit here for a moment ?? im uh... waiting for someone, but there was this creepy guy in the parking lot staring at me and... well, i don't want him coming in and trying to talk to me, you know ?? ❜

[hansoeii]

we go just right.

[phantomrose96]

I think we should have a turn of phrase for "I'm not in the right, but I AM annoyed with this situation, so I just need to go bitch to a friend about this before I suck it up and go do the right thing" because more and more I'm finding this is a critical element of functional adulthood.

[jeyneofpoole]

the children keep clipping my songs for their ‘tick tock’ audios louis. they do not even know the lyrics they are using ma musique sombre to gyrate in a sickening fashion for their sycophants to slaver over i have poured my heart and soul into my art and they have sped it up to form some sort of esthétique. louis how do i make them stop this grotesquerie mon cher please

[poorly-drawn-mdzs]

Hey now, Let her cook!

[tanagause]

📲

[inkskinned]

because sometimes there are invisible tests and invisible rules and you're just supposed to ... know the rule. someone you thought of as a friend asks you for book recommendations, so you give her a list of like 30 books, each with a brief blurb and why you like it. later, you find out she screenshotted the list and send it out to a group chat with the note: what an absolute freak can you believe this. you saw the responses: emojis where people are rolling over laughing. too much and obsessive and actually kind of creepy in the comments. you thought you'd been doing the right thing. she'd asked, right? an invisible rule: this is what happens when you get too excited.

you aren't supposed to laugh at your own jokes, so you don't, but then you're too serious. you're not supposed to be too loud, but then people say you're too quiet. you aren't supposed to get passionate about things, but then you're shy, boring. you aren't supposed to talk too much, but then people are mad when you're not good at replying.

you fold yourself into a prettier paper crane. since you never know what is "selfish" and what is "charity," you give yourself over, fully. you'd rather be empty and over-generous - you'd rather eat your own boundaries than have even one person believe that you're mean. since you don't know what the thing is that will make them hate you, you simply scrub yourself clean of any form of roughness. if you are perfect and smiling and funny, they can love you. if you are always there for them and never admit what's happening and never mention your past and never make them uncomfortable - you can make up for it. you can earn it.

don't fuck up. they're all testing you, always. they're tolerating you. whatever secret club happened, over a summer somewhere - during some activity you didn't get to attend - everyone else just... figured it out. like they got some kind of award or examination that allowed them to know how-to-be-normal. how to fit. and for the rest of your life, you've been playing catch-up. you've been trying to prove that - haha! you get it! that the joke they're telling, the people they are, the manual they got- yeah, you've totally read it.

if you can just divide yourself in two - the lovable one, and the one that is you - you can do this. you can walk the line. they can laugh and accept you. if you are always-balanced, never burdensome, a delight to have in class, champagne and glittering and never gawky or florescent or god-forbid cringe: you can get away with it.

you stare at your therapist, whom you can make jokes with, and who laughs at your jokes, because you are so fucking good at people-pleasing. you smile at her, and she asks you how you're doing, and you automatically say i'm good, thanks, how are you? while the answer swims somewhere in your little lizard brain:

how long have you been doing this now? mastering the art of your body and mind like you're piloting a puppet. has it worked? what do you mean that all you feel is... just exhausted. pick yourself up, the tightrope has no net. after all, you're cheating, somehow, but nobody seems to know you actually flunked the test. it's working!

aren't you happy yet?

[castielsprostate]

i hate you "influencers", i hate you tiktok, i hate you "content creators", i hate you "unalive" and "s€x" and "dr/ügs", i hate you instagram, i hate you consumerism, i hate you family friendly, i hate you puritans, i hate you facebook, i hate you family vloggers, i hate you violating other people's privacy, i hate you modern day social media