Your first Casual Friday at the office, you earnestly asked your boss, Baxter Ward, why he was still wearing a suit when every other worker was dressed in jeans and t-shirts. He curtly told you that he was in his preferred clothing, and you wrote it off.
The second Friday, when he was once again in a full suit in the sweltering California summer, you still thought it was odd, but you were coming to realize that he was just an odd kind of guy.
Several Fridays had passed since then, and you'd gotten more comfortable in your position as Baxter's secretary. Comfortable enough for a little light teasing.
"Mr. Ward," you greeted him as he came into the building. Then you made some silly joke, something about being allergic to denim and comfort. Something that you couldn't remember because for the first time since you'd met him, he gave you a smile -- more of a smirk, really -- that finally met his eyes.
"Careful," he said in a soft, low voice. "One needs to pay special attention when speaking to one's superiors."
He'd always been uptight, polite but distant, but there was more than a hint of mischief in this words. Before you could answer, he retreated into his office, leaving you standing in the hall dumbfounded.
That's how you realized you had a crush on your boss.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
It wasn't unusual for you to go with Baxter to various appointments and meetings. You'd take notes for him at a wedding venue, or pitch in with him if a couple needed some extra help.
What was unusual, however, was a downpour in southern California. So when the two of you were walking down a busy street in the heart of the city and the rain started, you were unprepared.
You were shocked, looking at the sky like the weather was a mystery that needed solving. Baxter responded first, taking your hand in his surprisingly warm one and briskly walking you to stand under a nearby awning.
When you reached your destination, you saw him glance down at your hands, still clasped together. He dropped yours, and you instantly missed his warmth -- partially because of that crush, and partially because you were legitimately cold. The two of you hadn't been in the rain that long, but it was coming down fast enough that you were soaked to the bone.
Baxter watched, still silent, as you gave a shiver. His hands moved up to his lapels, and you saw him give a nearly imperceptible shake of his head. It could have been wishful thinking, but it seemed like he'd almost taken his jacket off to give to you. It wouldn't have done much good, it was as wet as your own clothes, but the gesture still had your heart beating fast.
"Shall we make a break for it?" he asked, that rare smirk gracing his delicate features again. He nodded his head towards his car that was parked down the street, but his eyes never left yours.
"Let's."
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
"If I ever agree to plan a destination wedding again, please kill me."
You snorted, glancing sideways at your boss in the back of the taxi.
It had been months now since you'd taken a job as his secretary, and you were something like friends now. Close enough that after a flight full of turbulence and the realization that the airline had lost his bags, he felt like you were a person he could go to for a death request.
He kept complaining during the short drive to the hotel, and as you were walking towards the front desk, he leaned closer to you and quietly said, "If one more thing goes wrong, I'm quitting."
"Oh yeah?" you asked, smiling. "What would you do."
He opened his mouth, then paused and closed it. You could practically see all the potential answers running through his head, and him trying to figure out what might make you laugh the most. Lately, it seemed more and more like that had become one of his favorite pastimes.
Instead, he glanced your way again and said "Dancing."
"Like exotic dancing?" you replied, waiting for the joke. "You could pull it off with those legs, and that wai --"
"Ballroom dancing," he said. "I used to do ballroom dancing."
"Really?"
"Is that so surprising?" he asked. You'd made it to the desk now, but there was a couple in front of you. As you waited, he turned to you, and you saw a sweet little twinkle in his eye.
"No, I guess not. But you'd make it into a career?"
"I could try my hand at doing it professionally," he said. "Or I could coach. Instruct."
He was about to continue, but the people in front of you left, and it was your turn at the desk. He gave you a small, sweet smile, then stepped forward and told him your names so the hotel employee could find your reservations.
That's when you found out that there was a mistake -- only one room had been reserved, not two, and the room only had one bed.
"Oh, for the love of --"
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izuku's love for you is—stifling.
like you've been wrapped thickly in a well-loved blanket, and no matter how hard you claw and writhe, it just gets tighter and tighter and tighter. unrelenting. inescapable. it's something you've grown used to. something you've learned to deal with in your own way, because at the heart of it, you know it's because he cares.
it's easier on certain days. days where he's had a particularly good patrol or where he's had nothing else to do other than relax at home. it's those days where you wake up to dappled sunshine through the window—falling across the smooth planes of his freckled face in a way that's utterly breathtaking—that you breathe easily and know he's safe. the light turns strands of his hair into a gold that contrasts against the deep green, and you brush a hand over his forehead in a way that makes him sigh in his sleep.
safe, you tell yourself again. where you can reach him. he spends so much time outside, jumping around the city to save whoever he can in a flash of green lightning. and you know he takes each and every single life he's saved and stores them in his heart. putting himself on such a high pedestal and holding himself to a standard that you think is debilitating, at times. hero work can be so personal, after all.
he holds the weight of the world on his shoulders, but here—at home—he can be himself. he can be izuku, not deku, and he can laugh and smile and dance around with you in your little, shared kitchen. he can love you without fear of this love being used against him, and he can hold your hands together and promise you another day where it's just you and him.
on other days—it's not as simple. not as easy.
it's the days where he's tasted some form of defeat, you think. some form of wretched helplessness or tragedy that strikes him at his core and topples the very foundation he's based his selfless heart on. he takes all his losses and holds onto them tightly—obsessing and dwelling over them in a way that's unhealthy. a way to cope with his agony.
sometimes he tells you what's happened, sometimes he doesn't—believing it be better if you don't know. but, regardless, at the end of these days he always comes back home—to you. unprepared, unknowing, you.
on one of these days—a day where you think something truly... shook him, deep within—you hear the door open to your home and expect to hear his familiar, cheerful voice. telling you how much he's missed you or about something memorable that's happened on his patrol. but you don't hear a word. it makes you pause and you slowly edge towards the front entrance to peek at him and see what he's up to—if perhaps he's tired and needs help taking off his shoes, or if he's deep in thought about this or that.
instead what you see is his weary, shadowed figure. standing hunched in the entryway with his hair covering his face and a hand gripping onto the edge of the wall where it opens up into the living room. he's breathing heavily, you realize, and you're just the tiniest bit wary before you find yourself hesitantly calling out his name.
it's like a trigger for him. his head snaps up, and you have just enough time to see a small, dark pupil, before he's lunging towards you and sweeping you up in an embrace. tight tight tight can you breathe you can't breathe.
you choke and feel his grip flex around you even further. "izuku—? what—"
"you're here," he murmurs quietly—so quietly—and then he's setting you down and letting his large, gloved hands pass over your face. then your neck. your shoulders and sides. then back up again. feverishly, nearly revenant. you don't say a word, eyes locked on that burning gaze of his—small and shadowed. "i'll keep you safe. you know that, right?"
it takes you all the strength in the world to unstick your tongue from the roof of your mouth. and your answer is teeny tiny. "of... of course. you will. i'm here."
you don't know if he's seeing you, really seeing you. however, you've dealt with this izuku before. and it never gets easier, not really. but you are experienced. so you let him obsess over you. let the look in his eyes pull you in deep deep deep until you relive those feelings of drowning in all that makes him, him. stifling, you think.
and he holds onto you. and he doesn't let you go.
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So. I know I just did a binding of The Disabled Tyrant's Pet Palm Fish, but that was a lectern book, and it's been tough to get a lectern binding that I'm completely and unreservedly happy with. If more practice is what it takes, then I'm game! But in the meantime.... this is the fish book. The romancing a fish book. The impatiently waiting for a fish demon to..... devour my essence book. The 'my servant thinks I'm fucking my fish' book. The fishpreg book. The fish themed wedding book. What, was I supposed to NOT use my exciting new fish leather??
Now, the struggle with fish leather is thst it comes in very irregular oval-y shapes. I wanted the spine to have the right weight, so I cut the biggest rectangle I could wrangle from the hide, and belatedly realized my remnants weren't large enough to get good corner pieces. So that's something to consider in the future! But despite that, the fish handled like a dream, the gold and brown aligned BEAUTIFULLY with a wave fabric I had in my stash, and I shamelessly went back to the scale themed endpaper well. I usually don't like repeating myself so quickly, but I had a lot of fun designing this typeset, and this story is just a delight on every level!
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