#ableism ment cw

[hosticaaa]

𝕯𝖆𝖇𝖎 ; Discrimination.

Woke up thinking Dabi thoughts so heres a hodge podge of things on my mind that I can't remember if I've talked about on tumbluh before but I know some things were brought up on discord ;

Made a post on Dabi's blog the other day mentioning the interaction between Dabi and Nejire in One's justice where Nejire asks Dabi is he's in pain/if he's okay due to his burns and honestly ? This is soooo important and Its wild to think that she's one of the few/only people who have shown empathy/concern about Dabi's condition. Like Dabi's burns are very gruesome and very obvious, they don't go unnoticed by people. While I do HC that some people initially think he's some kind of heteromorph, the fact that even when people realize those are wounds or that theres something "wrong" their usual reactions are disgust / shame toward him or fear. Their general approach when Dabi was homeless before he joined the LoV was to pretty much just shoo him away so he can go off and die somewhere like a diseased animal because whatevers wrong with him isn't their problem and they're disgusted and frightened by it. And tbh this hasn't just been the civilian reaction to Dabi either. Heroes have reacted very much the same. Theres two different things Hori did that I can recall that emphasize this. One is Hawks report, where Dabis smell is mentioned by Mirko and where he gets the "thoroughly wretched and unpleasant creature" treatment outright according to Hawks. ( Bombastic side eye bird boy. Like its hilarious and kind of understandable but also smh ) And the next is a doodle Hori did where Endeavor, Hawks and Mirko all mockingly react to Dabi smelling bad much to Dabi's frustration. And like wow, it might just be a joke image but its... Yeah. Because that's not even technically two strangers shaming him for something he can't help, one of them is his own dad, even though Endeavor had no idea Dabi was the remains of Toya at this point and the image isn't really canon, you get the idea.

And I think imo this further highlights the fails of Hero Society because, yeah, heroes are supposed to just be kind people who wanted to use their abilities to help others in need but society sucks and twisted heroes into tools for governments and bodies of power to ensure the continued oppression and control of their people in the wake of humanity growing beyond its human constraints ( side note the fact that so few people grasp these aspects of MHA blow my mind like its explicitly spoken about in canon on multiple occasions, the whole series is deeply xmen and similarly makes commentary on oppression, bigotry government corruption etc. Quirks are 1 for 1 allegories for Racism (Spinner), Ableism (Dabi and Twice), Queerphobia (Himiko and Magne) and Compress, Tomura and Stain working as robin hood-like figures who stand up for the common folk against these injustices and help / support / spur rebel groups to fight back. ) All the League are people who hero society has explicitly failed and oppressed, they've all been discriminated against and harmed for very unfair reasons that spit upon the virtues Hero society claims to uphold, and Hori very much displays this as a wrong that needs to be righted and it flies right over peoples heads but, anyway, I digress.

Dabi's own experience this way is similar to Tomura's, who was rejected and ignored and left homeless to have who knows what happen to him by everyone but AFO in his hour of need as a literal five year old child. A whole five year old child wasn't considered worth saving or helping because he simply "looked scary" and anyone who encountered him figured it wasn't their business and heroes could take care of it except none of them ever did.

Mentioned in one of my other hcs here, Dabi did have a kindly old man who helped him when he was younger, but he was one of the very few people who did. As far as my Dabi Lore goes, yeah Dabi did actually go to the hospital on the old mans advice with the money he gave him but ultimately ended up running away again before he could be properly seen to by doctors. He didn't know what to tell them about his burns, how he got like this or who he was. It was a scary unknown to him that could lead to things he didn't or couldn't deal with and he'd already had a pretty weird experience with a doctor and people that claimed to want to help him but obviously didn't (Garaki/Afo) so Dabi never got that medical attention and continued to not seek it.

Which brings me to thinking about the time my friend brought up their HC in an IC chat about Enji being very resilient to sickness thanks to his quirk and Dabi lamenting how he wished he got that part of Enji's quirk because he always feels kind of sick But the thing is Dabi does kinda have that factor of Enji's quirk he just doesn't know it. Its probably why Dabi has never got a severe infection. Aside from the supernatural literal zombie aspects of Dabi I've mentioned a few times, Dabi's stayed safe from unpleasant things he'd otherwise be a playground for if he didn't have Enji's quirk as a zombie boy.

Kinda gross so don't read on if you're easily grossed out A particular example is Dabi's heat/flames are also why he's never been flyblown despite the condition of his rotting burns. He's mentioned rats have tried to eat him in his sleep a few times but ultimately despite the fact a lot of his body is made up of dead tissue hence the funky smell he has, thanks to his flames, he's been kept clean of maggots and other nasties living in his dead skin. So yeah, in a weird, dark way Dabi's flames have worked similarity to Enji's in keeping him """healthy""".

And yeah, like, no Dabi doesn't like this part of himself. He's not cool with it. His apathy isn't because he really doesn't care or things aren't as bad as they are but he can't change it. He feels his own shame and guilt towards his burns and the state of his body. He's comforted by the idea that he's not going to live much longer and has romanticized/idealize his own death with this concept of the fact that when he goes all out all his rotting skin will all be burned away and he'll become nothing but a pretty, pure blue flame. Thats an appealing, comforting death to him with everything he's living with now. And on a similar note I wanna say despite all this Dabi doesn't hate his quirk. He doesn't even hate his disability. He's cool with these things. Hell, he loves his quirk. He's not really ashamed that it burns him and he doesn't feel as if he can't do as much as the able-bodied quirk haver can, he just knows or knew he needed to do things a little differently or a little less which doesn't bother him at all. The shame he feels is largely because of the blame he's been forced to feel by the people around him. By his dad who instantly pulled the rug out from under him when his disability was discovered due to his own Issues ™️ which were also largely thanks to workings of Hero Society, to the way other people have treated him ever since. So while he does feel shame and feel some things are his own fault when they're not, he's also generally aware society is the real "big bad" here and its a huge factor in why he so strongly follows Stain and why Stain and his ideology is so important to Dabi.

[coulsonlives]

Tumblr rpers don't get how many spoons it takes for me to start and stop and redo rp threads every other day lmao, this is the third time some asshole called me 'adhd ableist' for posting a friendly reminder how I can't plan and drop threads and start from scratch all the time or constantly follow new rp blogs because I have like a spoon a month for rp, and my brain can't keep track of it all. this shit needs time to EMBED and INTERNALIZE for me, you hear

Like for real, I have several chronic illness and my brain runs on a single coin battery, who the fuck are these people calling 'ableist', I'm just practicing self care for my own disabilities but god forbid my rp needs don't match someone else's I guess

Stop the lateral aggression, stop assuming a person isnt disabled just bc they don't give you explicit reminders of their exact disability holy shit

[go-to-the-mirror]

"Surely this informative website on domestic violence will not demonise mentally ill people" WRONG ableist infographic time

[organicclownfarm]

saw someone on the clock app talking about how the miss peragrine clusterfuck is more or less a crash course on the reasons tim burton aint shit. and like. good god lord they’re right. like in the book we have an explicitly jewish mc and tim makes a point of going “no ❤”. in the books, the titular character is older and physically disabled. tim has a habit of only including disabled bodies when he finds them visually interesting or if he can use that as a means of coding a character as evil, so naturally miss peragrine is younger, prettier, and able bodied in the movie. the only notable character of color is the monsterous villain who hunts children. this, in my opinion, is especially egregious bc in the book, the mc is told about the monsters by his grandfather, who grew up jewish in ww2 and everyone in his family naturally assumed that the monsters grandpa was describing were literal nazis and that visualizing them as monsters was his way of coping with the trauma after losing his family--- and tim goes and makes this monster a dark skinned black man in his shit show of a movie. like tim is infamous for “whites only but for my ✨artistic vision✨” and whenever he includes black characters in particular, they are either explicitly unlikable, outright evil, fall into some very questionable tropes, or often all three. he is not shit he has never been shit I hope he falls down a flight of stairs.

[stimtoy]

Will you be moving to CVR once everything is stable after the new update bullshit? It's incredibly nice over there (and the dev team doesn't support crypto like the Neos CEO)

possibly! i was considering neos but after knowing they support crypto def not JSDKVNDJKSV

a big reason i loved vrc so much was just the amount of worlds and avatars and stuff since it was the main vr social game for Years, but honestly if cvr stabilizes and keeps even a small amount of the new playerbase i'd be super tempted to hop!! apparently carrying over avatars is super simple which is def encouraging

it really sucks that vrchat shot itself in the foot with the eac stuff, not only is it notoriously bad but a lot of players relied on modded clients n stuff for accessibility, so ofc another game/company is leaving disabled people in the dark as usual OTL

[atypi-cals]

Pinned Post Time

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Formerly the Calendar Collective, now the Atypical Collective. We like the nickname Cal.

Polyfragmented DID System. 23 body age. Unknown alter count in the 200 range and many subsystems. White, trans, queer. It/Its pronouns are always OK to use for us, He/Him pronouns are OK to use unless otherwise indicated. We use both we/us and I/me personal pronouns. Sometimes we forego personal pronouns altogether.

Tonetags: In general we don't usually mind using them in message we send, but sometimes will ask them not to be used in messages to us, as they can cause us confusion and distress. We are also able to use the full word forms of tonetags as a compromise sometimes when otherwise incapable of using them.

We tag our posts with some sort of identifier like (Name).exe. This is mostly for personal/archival purposes.

Everything that you physically can reblog is OK to reblog.

We're also autistic, have ADHD, OCD, schizoaffective, and several PDs (Prism has a blog for PD stuff @prismposting )

We are physically disabled from multiple conditions and use forearm crutches.

I'm not bothered to make a DNI list and no one will probably care to DNI if they're on it so instead, know this: I curate my online experience to my personal enjoyment and safety. This means any blogs that threaten our safety or the safety of marginalized others, spread misinformation, or make us feel uncomfortable will be either removed as a follower or blocked, as we see fit.

This will always include bigotry, such as racism, homophobia & transphobia, and ableism.

I prefer not to participate in syscourse, for my mental health. My disorder doesn't need to be a debate. I'm just living here. The only "syscourse" this blog will see is correction of misinformation, regardless of "side".

Please keep in mind that our posts are not necessarily meant to be broadly relatable and may be specific to our own experience with C-DID. I tend to view my system through a very medical lense as it has helped me with recovery from my trauma. Do not assume I am forcing this choice on you or come at me with ill intent for voicing my own experience.

Do not feel entitled for more information than I have given. This paragraph is so long because I, lightheartedly, like to overshare on the internet, on my own terms. Really want to find out more and you have to sift through the endless sea of meme reblogs to find my untagged 3 am ramblings.

Anyone using the term "narc/narcisstic abuse" will be blocked on sight.

Tags we use if you need to block something (with the exception of flashing gifs or explicit talk about these subjects we only tag original posts): #alcohol ment, #weed cw, #drugs cw, #flashing gifs

OC tags: #oc.exe (catchall), #cal.oc, #poison.oc, #city.oc, #sol.oc, #von.oc, #oriel.oc, #os.oc, #chase.oc, #cora.oc, #aura.oc, #sonia.oc, #johann marie.oc, #cal.ico

You can find our ClanGen Warrior Cats OC Webcomic at @frogclangen

The tag for our actual cat is #naomi

[traumasurvivorshelpingsurvivors]

[ cw: ableism (perhaps my own? I'm not sure), using mental illness to justify abuse, emotional abuse tactics ment, smear campaign ment ]

My abuser used their mental health diagnosis to justify their behavior and avoid holding themselves accountable. For example, their response to being called out for gaslighting was: "I have poor memory because of [diagnosis]!" Or when trying to talk to them about their behavior they bring out googled links to their diagnosis, like "this will help you understand. Remember, I'm mentally ill."

But more often than not, the symptoms of what they linked me had *nothing* to justify their actions. And when I left they tried to paint them themselves as the victim, saying that I had targetted "a severely mentally ill person".

I have had a really hard time making sense of this. I don't think I was being ableist by calling out their behavior (I always called out the *behavior*) and not taking their diagnosis as an excuse, but was I?

Even more confusing is that after the abuse I got caught in a loop of frantic googling their abuse and cross-referencing with orgs supporting people with their diagnosis, only to realize that I should go seek a professional because an overwhelming amount of traits and symptoms resonated with my life as a whole.

Got any tips for the ensuing dissonance?

Hi anon,

I'm so sorry to hear that. That's so frustrating.

Mental illness is not an excuse to be abusive, nor is it an excuse from accountability. If you have poor memory for example, then perhaps it makes sense to say "My memory is poor so I could be wrong about this," instead of insisting that something is true. It sounds like your abuser is making it seem like he cannot be held accountable because he is mentally ill, which is dangerous.

It's hard to make sense of this because it doesn't make sense. I have a laundry list of mental illnesses but I am open to being held accountable because I want to be the best version of myself. Mental illness can really only be used to explain its symptoms. Abuse is not a symptom, it's an action independent of mental illness.

I encourage seeking a professional because you deserve care during this time, especially as you navigate and process this situation.

I hope I could help. Please let us know if you need anything.

-Bun

[circular-bircular]

CW: ableism, death threat ment, ableist and transphobic* language (*at least as far as our system is concerned)

I just noticed your tag of "at this point having did makes someone a sysmed" and it reminded me of the time we got asks telling us that all traumagenic systems should die because we're all traumascum and the only valid systems are endogenic, so I assure you that that is an actual belief. -Sega

YEP

I remember the survey done over at @equalsys about sysmed. It’s almost entirely used as an insult.

[coulsonlives]

Hi, how's it going? I just saw your post about spoons and how people in this RPC act like you're an ableist asshole over it, and holy shit do I relate, because it's literally happened to me too. Rant incoming, but I thought I'd pass some validation your way... I have a lot of feelings about this.

Like you said, tumblr users have become absurdly brazen with the "you're ableist" accusations towards people with disabilities who are just trying to enjoy a hobby, and trying to ensure their needs are met by making them clear/upfront in their rules. Like, jesus christ... If you have depression or low spoons, and you easily burn out from high partner/character turnover, or if you don't spend a lot of time online, or if you get really disoriented if you log on once a week and see a lot has changed re: your partners' blogs and such, that's a valid concern. It's not being fucking "ADHD ableist" to say you burn out if partners have a high turnover with their blogs or characters, so you prefer to follow people whose blogs and characters are more stable. It's not "ADHD ableist" to say you prefer writing longform posts rather than one-liners. It's not "ADHD ableist" to say you have memory issues, so you can't manage when threads or characters change a lot. That last one about memory is very ironic, because ADHD can literally affect working memory too, sometimes you need to take the exact same approach with it! Anyways, long story short, there's no "right" way to roleplay. My approach to roleplaying isn't going to be compatible with everyone else's, that's just the way it works. But some assholes don't understand that at all, and they throw fists over it, and I just? Stop.

We're not saying "if you roleplay this way, you suck ass", or "this way of roleplaying is better than the rest", or "if you read these rules, you must do as I say because I'm a bossy controlling high-maintenance bitch", but that's literally what the Reactive Outrage Crowd seems to interpret from our rules... Which we've put upfront out of courtesy, before people even interact with us. And I'm sick of it. I've seen it happen to my friends, and it's happened to me, I'm sorry to hear it's happened to you, too, ugh. You can be the nicest person, and you still get shit because people take screencaps out of context or whatever, and they think their disabilities and ND traits give them full license to order us to conform to their own specific needs, which they wrongly believe is the only "right" way to roleplay, so we must conform to them, and them only.

What the hell happened to, "we are fundamentally incompatible as writing partners, so instead of trying to force each other to fit into a mold, which is only going to lead to frustration, let's acknowledge we are too different, and find partners who are more compatible"?!

Honestly, these last few years.

The worst part, in my opinion? How tumblr's RPC is full of petty-ass roleplayers who like to pretend they're inclusive, and understanding of people who are ND or who have disabilities, but as it turns out... They're only accepting if you're the "right" kind of ND or disabled, fuck you if you're anything else.

Are you autistic, and do you have very blunt or direct rules that are formatted in bullet points? Maybe you'll hear, "wow, if I wanted to apply for a job and check off boxes, I'd go on indeed, lmfao" (I wish I were kidding, this has happened). Have health problems and need to explain the specific ways it affects your writing or blog organization, which involves a lot of tag lists and explanations? "Wow, these rules are so long, nobody with ADHD is going to read a textbook, lmaoo." (Yes, I've also seen this.) Prefer not to follow people who are super into one specific fandom, because you don't want to hear about it, or because you don't want a higher likelihood of seeing that content on your dash (due to accidental untagging or something)? "Lmao, this person sounds like a wet napkin".

Are you kidding me?

Some people are so ready to shit on rules and posts that do literally nothing wrong. The only things these rules and posts do is show incompatibility with the person's own roleplaying style, in a totally non-judgmental way. But people equate these rules and posts to ableism and rudeness, because they've gotten it into their heads that their own way to roleplay is the "only way", and then they start stirring up the Outrage Porn mobs. Hey, look everyone, here's the latest in "shitty ableism," let's all stare and wonder wtf is wrong with this person who's done literally nothing even remotely offensive! Like that's not a super fucked-up form of entertainment. And why is it always "ADHD ableist", like you said? I feel bad for the people with ADHD who genuinely don't give a rat's ass about people's rules or finding faults in everything, and who just adhere to the live and let live mindset.

Like… Come on, people. There is nothing wrong with ADHD, or with preferring high-turnover threads or short rules and things... Just like there's nothing wrong with the alternative. Just shut the fuck up with the rules bullshit, regardless of your disabilities, and stop acting like you know what's best for all people and their own disabilities. People who are clearly incompatible with you don't owe you shit, especially if they're not hurting anyone or forcing you to do anything. You need to stop being so entitled and learn how to walk away like an adult. And stop calling everything ableist without it warranting it, because not only are you hurting ND/disabled people more often than not when you use it (sometimes without even realizing it), especially on a website like tumblr, but you're grossly watering down the term, and that's going to bite all of us in the ass one day. You shouldn't be proud of that, you should be ashamed.

Okay, I'm done lol.

(Shit like this is why I don't go on tumblr anymore, for the record.)

This needs to be framed and displayed in the tumblr rp museum of excellence, thank you for saying it

[lilyspeaking]

i have to say i think it’s incredibly funny how this blog suddenly appears after a specific member of everwell who not only made people incredibly uncomfortable by meta gaming, and starting drama for no reason, has left, but that you’ve not posted anything else other than things about everwell. by all means speak your truth but have the full facts first BESTIE, and these things - naming people? without even so much as other people saying things - hearsay - because this member - they couldn’t take making multiple members uncomfortable, in ways that I’m not even gonna point the finger over - YOU do realise naming people, even if it’s an alias can constitute as slander and these posts can be traced. just a tip.

cw / ableism, transphobia, homophobia, racism ment

it is really interesting that one admin has acknowledged mistakes and made a post, yet the other is flooding my inbox with threats, and potentially even slurs!

i know the member you’re referring to, and they’ve showed me the instances you’re talking about. from the messages received by that member from an admin, they were never explicitly told what had been done by them that was making people uncomfortable, and when they asked for more info the admin refused.

if you’re publicly tying your name to racism, pedophilia, ableism, and so much more… yes, i’ll say your alias.

[cepheusgalaxy]

T h i n k i n g a b o u t the horror au

Cws: self harm ment, queerphobia, ableism, misoginy and racism mentions.

Im still gonna go with that route but I think I wanna get those concepts ive talked about and turn them into analogies

"God forbid a [insert minority group here] be angry"

Its a line i see sometimes and honestly, i think its true. If you are a part of a minority group, may it be queer, black, asian, muslim, woman, disabled, neurodivergent, or whatever it is, people dont want us getting mad. They take us to our limit and then demonize our anger. See, a black person mad? Violent. A woman? Histeric. A trans person? """"""Delusional"""""". A disabled person? "Negative and dreadful >:(".

Going back to the horror au, Megan's thing is that hes being kept captive by a scientist who wants to turn him into a horror monster. It doesn't work since they defeat him first, but Megan is left with outbursts of strong feelings and goes Feral mode sometimes :) i think if i can change it a bit, i can get it to be a metaphor for Anger. Hes been through a lot, and now hes Angry. Its "monstruous" tho. He avoids it. He even goes as far as self harming to keep himself from going Feral Mode. He does it for the comfort of others. Yes it may be violent, and he does need to find a better way to cope than just self sacrificing and harming himself just because its better for others :) but its Ok to be angry. Ofc tho, im gonna have him learn this the hardest way ^^

[plural-culture-is]

Plural culture is when your alters perform as you as half assed as possible, but your Dad is too ableist to notice. Some of them are so bad at faking our host's accent, THE HOST DOESN'T SMILE THIS MUCH, WHAT MODERN MAN SAYS GROOVY? Kokichi uses kaomojis and Kevin uses emojis... Vriska literally types in zirs quirk! But no, we couldn't be a system, he said so.

.

[ohkraken-a]

and another thing while i’m on the topic and i just need to get this off my chest i guess but my coworkers are so fucking ableist towards people with mental illness and will talk about how crazy or weird people are and i’m literally like hey guys! i’m right here! and then they’ll either a) say they have their own things too like me which. buddies. not the same. or b) will insist how like extra weird the people they’re talking about are which fun fact: makes me doubt my own clinically diagnosed issues which i already do anyways, and! can people also stop doing that??? like just because someone seems “normal” to them and “doesn’t act like they have mental illness” don’t fucking tell them that???? like what does that fucking mean to act like you have it anyways that’s such a fucking gross way to think i’m just

i can’t get coherent thoughts across i’m just so fucking mad

[aro-culture-is]

Do you advise against answering aphobia? I answered back someone cause they ended up on my dashboard since they put their shit in the aro tag.

yeah, I don't answer aphobia directly 98% of the time. i kinda pick and choose my battles + I try to only answer ones where it's less of someone being... explicitly shitty, and more being misinformed. that's maybe 1 out of the 2 percent i answer.

the other bit is: instead, i block and delete it if it's an ask / block the person if it's a post or reply, and then make an affirming post to the contrary that DOES NOT MAKE THEIR ARGUMENT FOR THEM. ie, don't talk about their shitty view, or just reverse a negative. this is

if you get something in the form of like, "anyone who likes pizza is morally corrupt", a text post saying "just a reminder people who like pizza are morally good :)" is often... obnoxious moreso than helpful. the theoretical group being judged here (people who like pizza) is likely to realize that you posted this after receiving hate. everyone now feels a little aware of that attitude, and even though your view is clearly opposite that, you've made their argument for them. instead, I try to do more of like, "people who like pizza are awesome. i feel like their discussions about what toppings are best have really taught me about my own preferences in a non-judgemental way."

... what a weird metaphor. oh well, anyways: BLOCK THEM if they aren't clearly in GOOD FAITH / actually trying to understand, do NOT interact, do NOT make THEIR ARGUMENT FOR THEM

i hope this helps!

- mod kee

[izzyliker]

knocked flat on my back by the sheer amount of things to process here

[prettyputrified]

"Lol im so quirky I like the DEFORMED and UGLY villain instead of the CONVENTIONALLY ATTRACTIVE hero"

this is paraphrasing obv but slasher fandom please stop

People irl, slasher fans irl, have disabilities that make their faces look different than usual. In non horror movies too villains have been given disabilities, especially facial differences, to show that they're evil since media began.

Why are we, the fandom that's supposed to love people who have been told they were monsters, perpetuating that? If the qurkiness is about them being murderers why do you need to mention that they're """"disfigured"""?