#actually no its not either. they just moved out

[thesassypadawan]

Ask Nicely (Master Anakin x FemPadawanReader)

Summary: Somedays you think your new master hates you and others… Well, let’s just say, you find out soon enough…when he expresses his disdain for you asking Obi-Wan nicely to take care of your needs.

Warnings: 18+ (minors dni), because of all the lovely smut. Jealous Skyguy, rough fingering/kisses…and Ani’s thick digits. Padawan Reader is of age, 5 years younger than him.

“What’s the big deal? All I did was train with Master Kenobi,” you huffed. Rolling your eyes so hard that you wondered if they’d get stuck like that.

Anakin had been lecturing you nonstop for the last half hour. Starting from the minute he had practically dragged you out of the dojo…through the temple halls…back to your shared quarters. His strong hand wrapped firmly around your arm the whole way.

“For the fourth time this week,” he growled. Arms crossed as he leaned in the doorway, a frown on his face. “As your master, it’s my responsibility-”

“And you’re doing such a great job…” Having shed the last of your sweat soaked clothes, you began rummaging through your drawers. Back turned to him, not caring that you were standing there in only your undergarments. “…of neglecting those duties.”

You weren’t in the wrong, not in the very least. The two of you never had the greatest of relationships or, for that matter, one really at all. Constantly arguing and fighting, butting heads over anything and everything. Which grew worse when you abruptly became his padawan learner; to the point where you were verily certain that he hated you.

Or there was always something else that led you, made you want to believe…

Capturing your elbow, he easily whirled your around. “Listen here, it’s not my fault-”

“No, it is!” You snapped; jabbing your finger into his chest, refusing to stepdown. “You’re the whole reason why I have to go ask Obi-Wan nicely to help take care of my needs!”

Clearly striking a nerve, you watched as Ani’s jaw clenched tighter. Eyes narrowing at you, something dark flickering inside them. “Careful now; you don’t know-”

“Actually, I think I do,” you boldly interrupted once more. Mouth curling up into a sly grin, because you knew what you said next would anger him enough to either silence or… “You’re jealous! You can’t stand the idea of another man…let alone your old master…touching my body! Guiding me, teaching me how to move in ways that you aren’t able to!”

“Little one,” he snarled in warning. Shoving you back against the dresser, pinning you in place. Towering over your smaller frame menacingly.

You should have been terrified, horrified. Despite this though, you kept goading Anakin. “And his big hands felt so good resting on my hips… His fat cock pressing into my ass…”

Before you could continue, you were cut off by a quick, invisible squeeze to your neck. One that left you briefly stunned, speechless. “Yeah, yeah. We’ll see what you have to say about Obi-Wan after I’m done teaching you.”

Not even a second later and his mouth was slotted against yours in a fiery kiss. Biting sharply at your bottom lip, demanding entrance. All the while his mechno hand found its way to your breast, tearing the bindings off like they were nothing.

The moment the cold air hit your exposed nipples, you let out a small whimper. Allowing Ani to slip his tongue in, wrestling with and pinning yours down. Showing you who was in control, attempting to force you into submission.

You tried to pull away, but he held you fast to him. Organic hand gripping the back of your head, long fingers tangling and tugging your hair roughly. The other delivering a solid slap to each tit before he finally decided it was time to break apart.

Gasping, coughing for air. A desperate whine escaped you as he trailed his lips down your jaw, your throat; leaving an array of lovely marks in their wake. Until they wrapped themselves around a pebbled bud; sucking hungrily, biting lightly when your back arched in response. “M-Mast-ter.”

While he lavished your chest with hot kisses, Anakin’s hand followed the curves of your body. Brushing your clothed mound, chuckling once he felt how drenched you were. “Would you look at that; already so wet for me. Bet the old bastard can’t get you like this…”

Nipping a sensitive nub one last time, he had risen back up. Hand grasping your chin tightly, lips crashing against your in another searing kiss. Making you mewl softly, body trembling in anticipation.

“…or sound like that,” he growled low. Suddenly yanking your panties to the side, plunging two leather clad fingers into your cunt.

Squealing, you clenched hard around him. Walls fluttering from the foreign sensation, from being stuffed so full. Hips rocking back and forth in time with his painfully slow pumps. A squelching sound filling the air.

Wanting and craving more. All that pent up frustration had you already so embarrassingly close to crashing over the edge. That you were reduced to a mere babbling mess when Ani abandoned your mouth and pressed his lips to your neck again. Kissing the junction of it and your shoulder, tongue lapping at the tender flesh. A pleasant shiver running down your spine. “P-please…please…”

His pace picked up, thick digits thrusting deep with you. Bullying and bruising your cervix, muttering. “Oh, are you close? You want to cum?”

Panting, you nodded frantically. The heat inside of you overwhelming while you lost touch with reality more and more from each drive.

“Words,” he demanded. Adding the remaining two, slamming them brutally into your packed pussy. “Use them.”

“Yes, s-so close!” You squeaked, the coil in your stomach threatening to snap at any moment. “L-let me c-cum, master!”

At your words, he sunk his teeth in. Breaking the skin, hissing a ‘no’ as he abruptly withdrew his fingers. Pulling away, your fresh blood tinting his lips red.

A wild cry flew from your mouth. Sobbing at the denial, body sagging against the dresser. Hips bucking shamelessly in the air, trying to regain the pleasurable feelings that had been coursing through you.

Grabbing your ass, Anakin squeezed…smacked it hard. Smearing your slick across your freshly soiled panties. “Only good padawans get to do that…you haven’t been. Now, why don’t you try asking me nicely and maybe…I’ll help take care of your needs.”

Tag List: @espinathena-17, @myheartwillgoon2022, @cacti5539, @wifeofasith, @princessswifie, @kenobiskywalker16, @loverforoldermen

[sabh0]

"If you want me to talk solely about the manga vs anime skk"

I do, actually.

Please.

Pretty please with a cherry on top.

Aight!! I will be just pointing out some differences/stuff that was deleted from the anime.

Under the cut

THE DUNGEON SCENE:

-When they first meet again in the manga, they throw some silly jokes at each other (like Dazai asking Chuuya if he's hiding a bald spot. And Chuuya just taking his hat off to show him he's, in fact, not balding)

-In the manga when Chuuya calls Dazai the youngest mafia executive, in his mind Dazai is wearing his ADA clothes but keeps the black coat and the bandaged eye. I think it's a very silly detail

-In the anime, in anger Chuuya actually cuts Dazai's cheek with his knife. In the manga, the moment he starts getting angry he jumps away from Dazai and then throws the knife to the floor, not touching him at all

-Manga Chuuya falls to his knees (basically standing on all 4s), having a lil crisis after realizing Dazai only stayed in the dunegon to meet him. He gets up in a while, just to yet again squat on the floor after Dazai yapps more

-Obviously the pigeon-stand scene: in the manga Dazai is laughing to tears at this, while in the anime he stays silent. (Tho i must say i find it funny that Chuuya gets angry over Dazai not laughing,, like he tried so hard and this guy just :| him)

LOVECRAFT FIGHT:

-This is not about skk but lord yall know that panel where Chuuya ie standing on all these Guild ppl being all like im gonna beat ur ass next. He's just standing normally on the floor in the anime. Aughhhhh this panel is so good aughhhh. Ok anyway back to skk

-When Dazai nullifies John's ability, in the anime Chuuya just kicks Steinbeck from behind. In the manga, skk perform that silly move where Chuuya jumps from behind Dazai. It just shows how even after 4 years of not working with each other, they instantly work together as well as before

-Skk arguing about who's walking next to who like some preschoolers ('dont walk next to me' 'its you who's standing next to me' typa thing) then deciding that they're gonna stay at least 2 metres away from each other

-The manga clearly shows Chuuya's expression when he's talking about 'being happy when Dazai left'. He definitely doesn't look very happy. (In the anime we just get some background drawings)

-Manga Chuuya's lil blush when Dazai compliments his taste in shoes 😭😭

-When Dazai asks for Chuuya's knife, in the manga Chuuya just goes 'oh sure lemme find it' and is actually ready to give him the knife. In the anime? Chuuya doesn't search for the knife, instead he just gets annoyed

-Anime deleted the scene where Dazai talks to Chuuya about recording Kunikida while he was cursed with Q's ability. Chuuya going bruh he also annoys ppl in the agency

-those two idiots calling each other stupid nicknames for half of a page

-Chuuya mentioning keeping a track of women Dazai made cry and threatening him with sending them Dazai's address????

-Dazai telling Chuuya that his intelligence will be consumed by his hat (im currently looking at my polish version of the manga so the translation may be a bit off but anyway)

-Before activating Corruption, they yet again call each other a bunch of stupid nicknames (ahah consider this a silly form of goodbye if anything happens)

-Remember my post about Dazai keeping his eyes on Chuuya at all times during Corruption in the manga? In the anime he looks either at John or at Lovecraft, no puppy eyed loser

-Just a mention that in the manga we see Chuuya sleeping while he's sitting, he doesn't flop passed out to the ground (until later)

Well i will stop there for now bc it's past midnight and umm this is gonna be long af if i continue with the rest so,, i will add the differences in the next skk interactions tomorrow or something muah

[yogurt200]

do you have any advice for those just starting out using renpy/ making games?

im still learning my way around renpy and making visual novels and what works best ..here are some personal findings:

..try to replace renpys default ui and mess with the options.rpy and screens.rpy right away , the more time put into it the easier it will become to make something unique to your senses. you can change basically everything. you dont have to make a widescreen vn either..4:3, square or portrait mode are possible as well

..look into layered images, the feature is really awesome if you want sprites that change outfits or want to be able to do unique expression combinations without having to save a png of every one

..its good to define characters, atl(animations), images, transitions etc each in their own .rpy file. you can make as many .rpy files as you need and you dont have to only use "script.rpy" to write your story. i divide my script into act files to make it easier..

n some not renpy stuff:

..this software helps you take breaks and avoid RSI and it is pretty invaluable for me. it will track based on the time you spend moving your mouse or keyboard. this also helps keep on task n if you get distracted you're more aware of it.

..if you are a writer, i cant recommend getting an alphasmart neo2 enough. especially if you cant handwrite. its an old device that lets you type textfiles without a bluelight screen. you can 'send' what you write directly to your computer through a printer cable and it types it out. it fits plenty and its useful for writing script outside the computer. refurbished ones on ebay are good.

..its easy to get really overambitious and perfectionist and then not make anything as a result..my advice if this comes up is to prioritize the existence of the thing rather than its ability to match the impossible image in your head. that ideal picture will always be shifting into more impossible territory as you improve anyway, so think about what you're actually capable of and make it actually happen!! important to remember ur not triple A studio.. being independent is an advantage cuz you can do anything!

thts all i can get from the top of my head tht i havent said here before(ithink?)..i think about the last one a lot honestly i think thats my best advice i have if you can call it that

hopefully this helps.. good luck with your vn/game!

[morverenmaybewrites]

Hi babes, long time no see....? (Not realy, not truly. But i'm bored and in need of the weight your words press evenly onto my lungs. And i also want to poke you, maybe)

What would be the prise and/or compliments Jason could be fine with? To you, with our delivery girl. Because anything phisical feels dependent on the day, how Aware and squeezy it'll make him. (Like how you suddenly remember that there's clothes on your skin and that your organs move inside of you. That you're Breathing and that it pulls at your muscles, the tissue that's marbled in tapestried along his ribs.)

What would Not do that? (Less so atleast. See: Like skin growing over a splinter istead of rejecting it.)

Also!

This. Made me feel the sudden ache of my heart durring that time in my life. 'S cool. Thanks. 👍

Always so good to hear from you, @thebluespacecow. First off, The Shape of Water is one of my comfort watches/reads. The book, in particular, encapsulates the feeling of isolation from society and the suffocating loneliness that comes from it so well. The quote (said to the Asset by the scientist studying him) so perfectly portrays their relationship and the tragedy of what could have been. The text often refers to (and eventually confirms) that the Asset is a god. It often calls him beautiful and magical and wondrous. Can you imagine finding god, in all his grace and savage beauty, and being told that you must study him like an insect pinned to a corkboard? Can you imagine finding proof of the divine, only to be told to burn it down so that the charcoal of its bones can help fuel a war? It's so tragic. One day that Bucky Barnes Shape of Water!AU WILL come into existence. ONE DAY. Anyway. Your question. What would be the prise and/or compliments Jason could be fine with?

I actually think that Jason would be fairly receptive to praise, actually! It doesn't immediately put him on the defensive the way physical forms of affection would. And for most of his life, Jason didn't get much of either. He craves it, however unknowingly, like a man dying of thirst would crave rainwater.

I think the first time you praise him, however small, however innocuous, would always come as a surprise. He's just not that used to it. Maybe he opens a jar for you or point out, where, exactly you had put the spices. (He is, at least, somewhat aware of how much he pays attention to you.). "Thanks, Jason, you're always so helpful." The words scatter from you like birdseed, there and gone again. It barely disturbs the still air of the kitchen. But Jason freezes, and slowly turns to look at you. You're not even looking at him anymore. Instead, you are focused on the recipe you're reading, mumbling to yourself. (In his experience, praise does not come so easily. It comes from long hours of training to perfect his aim, from endless nights of study, it comes from a grueling patrol, done perfectly, to Batman's exacting standards.) (In his experience, he barely does anything praise-worthy at all. He is, after all, the Robin who failed.) The moment passes, and he is able to brush it off. But your words linger in his mind like a thorn, only the sensation is not so unpleasant. The next time you do it, Jason is a little more prepared. Maybe he comes up with a clever solution to a problem, taken down a villain in an unconventional way. And you say it in between fits of laughter (and even the sound of that warms him like a fire in winter). "That was smart. I never would have thought of that." Jason pauses, has to catch his breath. And he mumbles out an answer so low that it's unlikely that you heard it. "Thanks." After that, it gets easier. After that, he seeks it out like a cat seeking out a beam of sunlight (or perhaps, more accurately: like a starved dog seeks out scraps). "You never told me you were such a good cook." "It's nice having you around. You make me feel safe." "You look good today." The last one though, hits like a punch to the gut. It knocks the wind out of Jason, and he has to take several seconds before he can answer.

"What?" You look up from the book you are reading. (It is raining the way it always is in Gotham, and you had chosen to spend the afternoon inside. Curled up with a thick blanket on your lap, in a sweater that is big enough for you to drown in—he would not question it if the compliment had been directed at you. He would have taken it as your due.) "Hm? I said you look good today." Again, he does not answer. Instead, he looks down, as if expecting to find himself wearing someone else's skin. But he is wearing his outfit, it is the Red Hood's helmet in his hands. For the first time, you seem to have realized the effect your words have on him. "Well, don't get a stroke," you say with a grin. "I don't want you coming back here and saying you're leaving me for a supermodel or something." He lets out a strangled laugh, and tries to brush it off the way he did in the kitchen, all those months ago. He turns away and tries to pretend like your words don't haunt him like a ghost. You said he looked good. You said he looked good. (And after all, what reason would he have to doubt you? He trusts you more than he trusts himself.) He finds that he has to put on his helmet to hide his grin.

[sugar-omi]

OMFG DUDE I was thinking abt coves dick again (as one does 🤭) and just realized w the dick size math that cove prolly bought normal condoms before yall went ‘all the way’ bc he didn’t kno he was huge (like u said in that one ramble like “move ur arm” “that’s not my arm”)

so when yall actually get into it and he tries to put it on u just have an awkward moment where he’s like

“it’s too small🧍‍♂️”

and now he’s apologizing for ‘ruining’ ur ‘real’ first time together and ur torn between comforting him that he didn’t ruin shit and laughing bc usually when guys say that it’s a fucking lie but he’s actually so deadass and u can see it the way the rubber doesn’t even accommodate his tip 😭💀

then u gotta tell him it’s okay to hold off until yall get bigger condoms or ur okay going raw if he is 🤭🤭🤭

-🗑️

ARGHH YOU ARE NOT HELPING MY ACCIDENTAL CREAMPIE BRAINROT. "the way the rubber doesnt even accommodate his tip" ohhh god biting my lips off my face rn. i can't fucking....

he would be too scared to go raw, especially first time. he knows that's a demon he's not ready to face (if you ask, he'll say he worried about any accidental children. but deep, deep in his mind. he knows something will, and does, click when you do it raw and he cums in you the first time...)

mmm, there's a few different ways to go with this...

because I can see cove waiting, im sure he does. he does wait, he wants things to be perfect (as perfect as 2 virgins fucking for the first time can be) and for you guys to avoid any unwanted scares or accidents.

but I also love the thought of him being impatient..

he buys the "right" condoms the second time around, and it doesn't look exactly right... but it's definitely not as small as last time...

decides to go with it after a bit of inner turmoil... "..maybe it's meant to fit that way? I thought it was supposed to go all the way to the base, though. its a bit tight, too... fuck, it'd be way too embarrassing to get the size wrong again. not that y/n would bully me about it or something, but... argh, I really want this to be perfect too. and I wanna go all the way with her..."

or even if he buys the right size, perhaps doesn't realize, or chooses the thin condoms since that's what was left. doesn't realize how different the thin ones are, especially of they're the ultra thin.

eitherway, all~~ circles back to right now. he's sinked into you, and he is gentle, he wants your first time to be romantic after all. but as he gets closer n closer to the edge, he gets a bit excited, his hips thrusting deeply into you.. all he can think about is how much he loves you, your pretty sounds, your body pressed against his, and the tight heat of your cunt.

doesn't realize when it breaks, not really anyway. gasps and moans because fuck you feel so hot inside, so wet and perfect... too far gone to think about the sudden change in sensation. and when he finishes, he definitely doesn't think about it. too lost in the feeling of his cum filling up the "condom" and your walls tightening around him as you finish too.

also love the thought that regardless of if he buys the right size or the thin, or if he remembers to pinch the tip of the rubber, all that sweet stuff.. he still ends up cumming inside you. not noticing if he teared the rubber in his hurry to be inside you already (blame teenage hormones, it's not his fault yeah 🙏)

of course not blowing his full load inside you, but i like to think that he cums so much, its really a miracle he doesn't break the rubbers from that amount alone... either way it's gonna leak out, n even just that little bit..

but regardless of how it happens, once he gets past the initial stress of it all n you get past the scare. his mind is totally filled with thoughts of actually coming inside you..

n even his dreams are filled with the image of your cunt all twitchy and wet with fluids n a bit puffy from all the fucking, n having earlier ate you out in the dream, n his fat load of cum leaking out of your cunt...

can't look you in the eye. he's totally ruined... probably can't look his parents in the eye either since he promised to be responsible, but now he's dreaming and fantasizing of doing otherwise..

[crestfallercanyon]

I don’t think I’ve seen two “ship” characters who embody “cat and dog” more than Len and Barry. I know I am certainly not the first person to think about this but I’m just thinking about it in depth today, i dunno.

Maybe it’s because most ships I’m part of don’t contain a hero and a literal thief/criminal but I digress—

Len is 100% like a cat. He gets into places he shouldn’t (how? And wait — why?). While he seems to have a grasp of how he feels and what’s going on, fuck off if anyone else does, he portrays himself as extremely mercurial. He is the type of guy to just push a glass of water off the table and let it shatter just to see you clean it up (Barry’s “don’t spill the salt” and him laying it flat on its side). Fiercely protective of his own food, will mooch off of others and get offended if he’s told to fuck off. Desperately vies for attention by any means necessary (from nuisance to straight up CRIMES) but when attention is on him when he doesn’t want it he hisses and claws and acts all ferocious. Loyal to those he loves but leaves them all wondering “do you even like me?” And he responds with essentially “can’t you tell?” And when they’re like “no, that’s why I’m asking,” he’s shrugs and goes with “well it must suck to be stupid,” and moves along and his loved ones still don’t know. Gets roped into shenanigans on the regular and is either faux-reluctant or genuinely reluctant. Cat behavior.

Barry, however, is SUCH a puppy. He’s high energy. He sticks his nose into everything. He constantly gets himself into situations and then looks at others with the big sad eyes asking “how he got here” and “I want out”. He wants to eat all the time and will steal food — but when bucked off he just kind of is like “aw, darn,” and may try again in two minutes. He’s got that neglected shelter dog rizz, he’s kind of sad sometimes and a little pitiful. If someone doesn’t like him, he just keeps trying until they do or they die. His relationship to cats is tenuous because they seem to tolerate him but he’s also fucking obnoxious and ruins their peace and quiet. Has a deep sense of right and wrong and it’s somewhat taught through commands and sometimes just instinct he acts on — like a dog who pulls its owner on a leash to investigate or run away from something. When he’s calm he’s very sweet and very nice and very cute but when he’s high energy he’s a menace. He overall looks super sweet but could fucking kill you. Sometimes he gets ferocious and barking and then he’s actually genuinely frightening and sends everything running. He doesn’t like being that though and typically just wants to hang out. He wants his people around him all the time and doesn’t like to be alone. Loves affection. Loves giving affection. Like, what a puppy man, I don’t know what to tell ya.

Anyway. There’s my coldflash thoughts of today.

[saintgoths]

ᴡɪᴄᴋᴇᴅ ɢᴀᴍᴇꜱ

POSSESSIVE!JOEL X SIREN!READER - WICKED GAMES.

[PART NINE TO THE SIRENSERIES]. ITS ACTUALLY CALLED NOVEMBER.

WORD COUNT - 3,885.

RATING - 18+. [sex and violence].

SUMMARY - you and joel cannot stay away from each other, almost like star-crossed lovers.

feedback would be appreciated!

previous chapter - chapter eight.

It had been early October when you had found yourself in Jackson’s Horse Stable taking care of your horse, Mira, she had needed a brushing and you had felt guilty for leaving her lonely for a bit. On the other hand, Maria called for a group patrol so you were going to see your horse either way. Bella had accompanied you, had spoken about how annoying she had found her father, he had wanted her to take over the Butcher shop soon, he had always wanted her to take over it, and Bella had informed you he had become more persistent nowadays.

“Well, do you want to take over the shop?” You had questioned and with a brief thought and arms folded, Bella had hummed.

As she hastily looked at the wooden ceiling before she responded. “Yeah maybe, I’ll be more enthusiastic about running the shop if you’re there with me,” Bella said before she knowingly nudged you with her elbow. “Selling your fish.”

A fan of the idea, you had smiled. “That sounds like a good plan.”

“Oh, now I’m more excited to take over it,” Bella happily clapped, her vision now caught onto the moving figure that neared towards you two, their image becoming bigger at each step. She had recognised it to be Joel, who had held the saddle Bella had requested in both of his hands.

You had gently curved back to recognise who had been there, when you had also noticed it was Joel, you had pressed your mouth into a thin line just as you twisted your body to face Mira, you had finished brushing her and had focused to feed your mare. You could feel the way he had stolen a look from you while he had discussed Bella’s horse with her. “Thank you,” you had heard Bella kindly say, she had then smiled as she waved him off.

Bella had then made sure he was out of sight to talk to you about him. “What’s going on between you and him?” She had asked and as you glanced at her with the side of your eyes, you had finally pulled away from your horse.

“Remember,” you began. “There’s no connection.”

Though, before Bella could investigate, the both of you heard the voice of Shiloh echo down the small but comfortable building that held some of the horses, there were many Horse Stables here, at least more than five that housed many of the horses, both Tommy and Joel had planned to build more with the rest of the core men. As you had closed the stable door you had quickly winked at your friend, you had taken a couple of steps backwards as you had spoken to her. “I’ll see you tomorrow, Bella, bye,” you smiled before you turned around to walk away from her, ready to throw yourself into Shiloh’s arms.

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

Jackson was so beautiful at night, you were able to look at the sky and see the beautiful stars twinkle and glow accompanied by the Moon, that had beautifully hovered the skies. You had looked out of your window, leaned over the window sill as you dragged out a cloud of smoke that had come from the cigarette in your hand.

You rarely smoked, but Shiloh did, and as you couldn’t sleep, you had stolen one of the sticks he had in his pockets that had been hung by one of the nailed hangers in your room. When you had smoked, it was usually because you were dearly stressed, normally stressed if you had done the wrong choice, and what you had done was pick the wrong man.

You had shortly glanced back at Shiloh who had been fast asleep, he had been in the same position he had been in ever since you had left the bed, well, he was a deep sleeper. Looked so innocent in his slumber, unaware that you had second thoughts of staying with him, an innocent man trapped in the middle of an unstable romantic field between two ex-lovers.

With a still face you had returned to look back out. Your home had been opposite of Joel’s. You had noticed that light in his bedroom had still been on, the bright essence seeped through the windows and into the dark atmosphere like a golden light at the end of a tunnel, even though every opening of his home had been closed, the doors and the windows. With your enhanced hearing, you could yet hear the strums of his guitar being softly handled as he began to sing a familiar tune.

“What a wicked game you play, to make me feel this way,

What a wicked thing to do, to let me dream of you,

What a wicked thing to say, you never felt this way,

What a wicked thing to do, to make me dream of you.”

He had sung, and soft, your eyes gently shut as you had taken in the way his deep and soothing voice expressed his sadness into his bedroom air. “And I don’t wanna fall in love,” he sang, unaware you had dropped the cigarette from the window, your hand had been placed against your chest as you tucked your bottom lip behind your teeth, allowed the magical and loving tone of his voice to have you gently sway in your room. Knowing that it was you that brought him to this feeling.

To this heartbroken and sad state, to this low state that had him singing a song that yearned for you. You didn’t realised you were crying, they were cold so they had felt like the passing wind. But once you felt the liquid trickle down your cheek you had quickly wiped it with the back of your hand, closed the window and went to sleep.

When the next day came upon Jackson, the group had already been on patrol, on their horses that had trotted away from the gated community. A duo that patrolled before the current group had informed Tommy and Maria that there had been a massive horde of infected on their way near Jackson’s location, thus, the leaders of the commune had made their best search for them.

The group had involved Joel, Gabriel, Bella, Shiloh and you, Tommy would’ve joined but he had caught a cold.

You had been paired beside Shiloh, Bella in front of you, Gabriel who had led the group and Joel who had been behind everyone. The ride had been quiet, the two of you had spoken every now and then, and Gabriel had shared a couple of jokes to lift everyone’s spirits. Gabriel had noted the shared energy between you, Joel and Shiloh, truthfully anyone would. Bella had glanced at you from time to time fore she gently patted her horse.

You had promised her you would explain everything to her when you’d come back to Jackson, and you couldn’t help but sometimes turn back to look at Joel who wouldn’t return his gaze, but be stuck on what kind of trees the group would ride by, what would be a good base or what type of rock he’d see. You had clenched your jaw, and eventually focused on what had been in front of you.

Time had passed and the group had eventually found the infected the previous patrolmen had found, it was near a mall, and you and Bella had decided it’ll be best to take out the infected inside the mall, followed by the men who had finished with the creatures outside. The building was evidently abandoned, and to the group’s surprise, there had been much places in the mall that hadn’t been ransacked, so after you had slain hordes of the infected, the group would busy themselves on taking supplies.

“[Y/N}!” You heard Bella scream before a bullet pierced into your face, but you had been quick to turn away, curved around so fast that the rest of the group would be unsure if the weapon had hit you or not, you had sharply winced, but the bullet easily slipped out of your face as if it ricocheted, it had plopped against the floor while your blood slipped back inside the bullet wound as if time itself had reversed.

You were healed within seconds but the sounds of bullets that had pummelled within the building had been everyone’s focus, once again, the group had been ambushed. “Take cover!” Gabriel yelled as he shot back at the rebels. “Fall back!” He had yelled and without realising, Joel had appeared beside you and pulled you from the situation.

Annoyed, you had tugged yourself away from him. “I can protect myself!” You bit as the two of you crouched behind a large block.

“I know you can,” Joel harshly replied. “But we cannot have another moment where you get shot and people see that you’ve healed.”

Lips tight shut, you had silently agreed with what the Miller man had said and continued to listen to what Gabriel had instructed everyone to do, the rebels were done with, but the large aggressive noises had attracted dozens of infected the group had fired at. “Fall back!” Gabriel shouted and in sync, you and Joel had twisted on your feet and paced out of the mall.

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

It was as if it had meant to be, the two of you stuck in the woods again, both your horses asleep once the two of you had found place to make camp for the night. Joel had been quiet behind you as you had worried about Bella and Shiloh, worried that something might’ve happened to them when everyone separated from each other.

“They will be okay,” Joel said, as if he had read your mind, but you didn’t have to be a mind-reader to acknowledge that the look you had on your face was filled with anxiety. “Bella is a good shot.”

Slightly comforted, you had briefly sucked in the cold night air through the tight gaps of your teeth. “She is,” you said as you had looked up at the moon, the luminary followed by its stars had reminded you of the inevitable connection you had with him, with Joel. “You always find way to come back to me,” you said as you finally turned to look at him, he had been crouched near a small fire he had made for himself, and you of course, to warm up. He had worn that coat you normally liked seeing him in, his beard messier but it had suited him, most of the time his brows covered his expressions he had in his orbs, but the flame had danced in them, as if it mirrored the blazing passion he had for you, but unlike the fire, the love Joel had for you couldn’t be dwindled by the wind.

You hadn’t secreted away the feelings you had, you looked at him with doe and pure innocence, and that truthful mask you had, commenced him to speak. A feeling bubbled in his stomach, as if the conversation the two of you would share would have you finally lay out your cards. “I always do,” he agreed, his thick accent intertwined with the calm softness he had shared for you. He had briefly twitched his fingers, as if to make him realise what had been happening between the two of you was real.

You didn’t look away, not this time. “You were not supposed to take me away,” you said in relations to Joel helping you escape from the mall. “Perhaps Shiloh, but not you Joel. He’s probably scared out of his mind thinking he lost me.”

“Anyone would be scared out of their mind to lose you,” Joel replied, his comment forward, this time, there had been no essence of hesitation, no anxiety of what the other person would answer with.

Your lips had trembled. “We let each other go a month ago. I chose Shiloh,” but you had wished you had chosen Joel.

You had closed your eyes to hold back your tears, your almost waterfall interrupted by him. “I know.” Joel said.

“But I missed you,” you responded.

You had gently peeled your eyes to open again. The wind that had passed by had aided your cold tears to quickly fall down your cheek as you had then spoke. “We cannot do the affair again,” Joel kindly reminded, he had wanted to be near you, to soothe you and to touch you, his fingers had trembled, the tips of his digits had felt like it had buzzed, he had wanted you so badly, had yearned for you like how the Sun yearned for the Moon. To be a part of it, to create an ever-lasting eclipse, he felt like he could die.

“It won’t be an affair if I leave Shiloh and come back to you,” you had said and shocked, the whites of Joel’s eyes had spread and he had watched you walk towards him and selfishly pull him into a kiss. “I’m so sorry,” you said as you then pulled away from him, but your fingers were still bold and dug into the fabric of his clothing, your foreheads were pressed against each other like you had challenged each other to go for another embrace.

“Are you sure?” Joel had asked. “You want to come back to me?”

“I was angry, I always wanted you, always you Joel,” you whispered and desperate, Joel had kissed you like he hasn’t kissed you before, had embraced you as if it had been thousands of years since the last time the two of you were together.

Near the fire, he had leaned you against the ground, potent with his hunger, Joel had easily pulled down your lower garments and began to kiss your inner-thighs, he had softly inhaled the sweet and warm scent between your thighs before he had given your cunt a sweet and flat lick, he had looked into you, watched how your orbs were watered with pleasure tears while you had moaned.

You had rested the back of your head against the floor and had allowed yourself to be taken by him, how he had worked his mouth up and down your pretty slit and slipped in his tongue inside you before he had fucked you with his tongue, your eyes had trembled, your fingers lost in the locks of your hair as you could feel his warm but rough hands carry up your thighs and hold the back of your legs.

He had caught your pearl with his mouth and flicked his tongue countless of times, each smack of his tongue had sent a jolt up your spine and you were fast to find yourself to orgasm, but he wasn’t finished, he had slurped your ambrosia while you had shamelessly cried into the night, called out his name and confirmed how much you were his. “All yours Joel, all yours!” You had whimpered just as you could feel a second wave of high push through you.

Joel had been quick to pull down his lower garments, his eyes trained on you as he watched the way you had harshly breathed in lust, you had busied yourself to take off the rest of your clothing and reveal the nakedness of your skin to him. The body he had sourly missed, missed to touch and taste, which his cock in his hand, Joel gently pressed himself against you and layered kisses on your neck before he moved his mouth around your breast and sucked on them, the both of you had moaned, both arms folded around his shoulders as the length of his thumb stroked his shaft that he head eventually levelled between your thighs.

“[Y/N],” he had moaned once he had pushed himself inside of you, the two of you had gasped in relief just as the tightness of your sex clenched around him, Joel stubbornly pushed through and moved his lips to your neck, licked and bit fore he started to move his hips forward.

You had locked your legs around his waist and whined, open for him as the length of his cock continued to gently fuck into you. You had buried your face between the crook of his neck and inhaled his masculine scent, he had felt so big and heavy, had missed how much he had filled you up as he made love to you, within seconds his movements became harsher and more strident, the sound of both of your skins that had slapped against each other had intertwined with the erotic moans that had come from the back of your throat.

He had shown how much he had missed you with how deep he had gone, the tip of his cock coating and licking against the sweet spots inside of your cunt as he whispered possessive and sweet words inside of your ear, you had felt yourself throb while you had whimpered, your eyes gently shut into thin slits as you had stared up into the sky, you had wanted to cry, how much he had opened you had over-whelmed you, as much as he had rigidly used you there was still an essence of hot and passionate desire that mirrored his devotion.

His body had become tense as your hips automatically bucked upwards, your cunt had spasmed and twitched around him as your hot cum coated his cock, he had kissed you again, his embrace tough as he fucked into you one more time, the stickiness of his load had brimmed you into replete, and once the high finished, the two of you had pulled away from each other and immediately started to put your clothes back on.

“Having second thoughts?” The man questioned and as you had finished to button your top you had shook your head.

“No,” you said. “But I do feel terrible,” you shared as the two of you had made way to your horses. “He’s so good to me but all I do is fuck you behind his back.”

Joel sighed as he helped you pulled yourself on top of Mira. “Well at least this will be the last time you do it.”

With a smile, you had agreed with him ere you pressed his mouth against his.

The two of you returned to Jackson, everyone from the patrol had also returned, so you had speculated that you and Joel had been the last ones to arrive. Shiloh had made a bee-line towards you, in relief that you had been safe, the man had immediately kissed you just as he encased his arms around you.

Stiff, you had kissed him back, felt his forehead press against yours as he moved his palms against your shoulders. “I thought I lost you,” he whispered and with a wistful smile, you had replied.

“I’m here,” you reassured as you felt the strands of your hair be stroked by his slender fingers.

He had looked at you lovingly, had held your chin with one hand and had caressed your cheek with his other. “I know,” he whispered and with a happy expression, you had allowed your boyfriend to wrap his arms around you, as he took you in and inhaled the earthy scent that had cloaked you.

“We should join everyone else at the bar,” Shiloh suggested. “To have a feast for what had just happened.”

You scrunched your nose in approval. “That sounds good,” you had said, as you had finally let go of Shiloh who had readied himself to take you to Seth’s bar, you carefully turned to look at Joel who didn’t look your way at all, you had understood why, but had pressed your lips into a thin line while Shiloh led you to the Tipsy Bison.

You were a coward, but you had just come back to Shiloh; to tell him you had wanted to break up with him in front of everyone would’ve embarrassed him, make him feel small and inferior, because he’d know why you’d want to stop being him, and the reason would be Joel.

⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⋆.ೃ࿔*:･

You had a good time at the bar, most of it had involved Gabriel telling everyone what had happened, and another part had included you drinking with your partner who had always found way to have his fingers stroke your knuckles while he drank his beer with his other hand.

Currently, the two of you had gone fishing again, you had drunk so much you had forgotten to tell Shiloh you didn’t want to be with him that night, but perhaps the time you two shared with each other at the small trip, would be the perfect time to break off everything with him.

Shiloh is a good man, he’ll understand. Today the two of you had barely spoken to each other but had indulged in the comfortable silence the two of you had shared. This time you hadn’t used your Siren-form to fish, and Shiloh had pointed it out.

“I have a lot on my mind, just want to use the fishing rod this time,” you had carefully answered. He had caught the unsure expression you had in your eyes and had paused.

He had gripped the arm of fishing rod and you could see the way he clenched his jaw with your enhanced vision, his curt motions had made you feel like he had known what you had wanted to say to him, what you were thinking about.

“You’ve been a good man Shiloh,” you had anxiously expressed. “A good man to me.”

“But you love Joel more,” Shiloh filled in the gap, and you had looked at him, and he had looked at you with an neutral look on his face, you couldn’t tell what he had felt, what had been hidden behind his eyes but you could feel his heart-beat, and at the beginning it was calm but slowly it had emerged into a faster pace. You had looked at him with sadness.

Aware with how he had put down his fishing rod and placed his hands into his pockets. “I’m sorry,” you had whispered as you put down your tools as well, ready to beg for his forgiveness.

“You don’t need to apologise,” he said as he shook his head. “You can’t fight it; the heart wants what it wants.”

Appreciative, you had nodded your head as you look back at the large body of water, in the middle of examining the way soft ripples had swum down in packs through the length of the sea, you had taken in the beauty of it. The beauty of life, and the beauty of having someone who was understanding, Shiloh. He was good, so good you had felt miserably guilty breaking up with him.

You had attempted to turn to look at him to speak, but before you could move an inch, a heavy cold object had been slammed into the back of your head.

The force so heavy you had no time to react but fall against the ground, knee first before your face pummelled against the floor. “But I’m a jealous and possessive person,” Shiloh said with a forceful smile. “And if I can’t have you, no one can.”

feedback would be appreciated!

masterlist

[monoclesnapple]

Intermediate Shenanigans

Bungo Stray Dogs Chuuya Nakahara & Gender Neutral Reader + Osamu Dazai & Reader + Odasaku X Reader Summary: Headcanons about taking care of middle schooler Dazai and Chuuya and dating Oda Beginning Note: Shoutout to all the class clowns/funny people, they're great inspiration for scenarios. @kiwibeanv helped with the stories of said funnies. Word Count: 2629 (Fluff/Crack)

First off, you're their parent figure and they live with you. All comfy with you and they trust you a lot. Now to move on to their stupidity.

Immaturity at its finest.

It’s constant arguing, pointing fingers, and the like.

They’re always fighting for your attention, pushing against each other so your hand can pet them.

You’re sitting on the couch, watching TV, when Dazai runs into the living room and jumps to the spot next to you. Since you’re leaning against the armrest, there’s only one seat next to you.

Dazai pushes himself under your arm and hugs your waist as he sighs contentedly. You idly rub his arm for a few minutes before Chuuya comes in with an annoyed expression.

“Oi, StinkZai, do your history homework before you go do whatever.”

Dazai whined and buried himself deeper into your side. “I’ll do it later! I’m tired right now.” He closed his eyes.

“Dazai, you need to do your assignments before you eventually forget and never get them done,” you told him. He let out a groan at that, “Why can’t Chuuya do it? Isn’t he supposed to listen to me since I’m smarter?”

“You’re not smarter than me! Even a shrimp can do better than you!” Chuuya sped to the two of you and pulled on Dazai until the latter fell to the floor.

“Ow!- That’s my spot!” The brunette rubbed his arm. Chuuya had stolen his spot in your arms now and smirked at the other.

“Maybe you should’ve done your homework first, you idiot!” He blew a raspberry and rested his head on your shoulder.

You sighed, “If you two continue to fight, I’m simply going to go to my room and relax without either of you.”

They both froze and looked at you then at each other. Despite their inability to cooperate without trouble, they agreed on the fact that your presence was probably the most important thing they want. They begrudgingly decided to keep quiet, moving so Chuuya can sit on one of your knees while Dazai reclaimed his initial place.

Eventually, they get their emo phases. One day, Dazai just randomly started wearing bandages over his eye, saying that he looks better.

“Why are you wasting bandages?” “Because I look so cool and a lot of girls come up to me and say I look nice! I know that so many people have a crush on me, especially when I’m like this!” “Just wait til they find out that this stupid mackerel is actually a bad person and a major turn off!” “Chuuya, don’t say that, please.”

And Chuuya had a Sonic phase. He thought the hedgehog was so cool, he wanted to be like him in as many ways he can.

He then found out about Conker’s Bad Fur Day and asked you if he could get it. You thought it’d be a wholesome game for kids, but when you looked at the plot and ratings, you didn’t buy it for him. He was sad, but got over it.

And then he came across Devil May Cry and decided to watch the gameplay and cutscenes because you might not buy it for him (you may consider, but it still has some scenes that you’re skeptical about.)

Nero from DMC4 is so cool despite the excessive “Kyrie!” throughout the game, Chuuya wants to dress like him. And dye his hair white.

Every time he loves a character, he wants to dye his hair their own hair color, but you never let him because why should he ruin his lovely hair? (He may or may not ask to dye his hair just so you can compliment him.)

Hot Topic is their favorite store because it has so many aesthetics and they love the style of the apparel.

They start simping for characters and reading fanfics. You know what they’re reading because they use the family/shared device and don’t delete the history. Why are there so many lemons? What do they mean? (Unless you’re a fanfic reader yourself)

They kinda know what sex is, they have a faint idea, but they’re probably wrong on a few things.

Hence, Dazai is excited for sex ed! Wooo! His head is smacked by Chuuya because the latter is embarrassed that he just yelled that out and now kids are looking at them.

When they’re learning about it, Dazai’s snickering at the pictures. But not the childbirth, what the actual fuck did they just watch? 

Oh boy, now they’re the cringe and immature kids who laugh at everything that can vaguely be related to sex.

Anyways, now to the scenario that was the whole reason for this

You were sitting on the couch, Dazai and Chuuya on the floor and you’re petting their heads. You check your phone, keeping a hand on Chuuya’s head and caressing it. He’s smiling with his eyes closed in bliss. Oh, how he loves this affection.

Until Dazai pushes and climbs on him to be the receiver of your pets. He smiles innocently when you glance over, but smirks at Chuuya, who shoves him as well and takes his spot back.

This continues to go on and you’re about to say something, but then the door is unlocked and opened. Dazai excitedly turns to see Oda coming in. He runs over and hugs the man while Chuuya sets himself in your lap.

After greeting Dazai, Oda is carrying him and walks to you and Chuuya, pressing a kiss to your head and ruffling Chuuya’s hair.    

You're in a relationship with Oda, and Dazai loves it.

His two favorite people together, who he might call his parents? How blessed he is!

He doesn’t know who he prefers, so the two of you are equal in his eyes. But when it comes to physical affection, he might go to Oda since Chuuya’s all over you and Dazai’s too tired to do anything. Also, he doesn’t see Oda as often as he does you.

Chuuya thinks Oda is great, but he’s not as close to him as Dazai is. If he had to choose between you or Oda, he’d honestly choose you.

Oda loves coming home to find you three waiting for him on the couch. It warms his heart that he is wanted and loved.

Either he comes home to you all cooking dinner, sleeping in a pile on the floor, playing games (board games or video) , or watching TV.

He still takes care of his adopted children at the curry shop, but he also enjoys the company of Dazai and Chuuya

Sometimes, he would bring those five kids to your house so they can play with Dazai and Chuuya. Everyone has fun, it’s like a party. (Sneaking kisses in the kitchen as everyone else plays video games on the TV)

Oda is a gentleman, whenever you two go out, he always opens the door for you, pulls out your seat, and kisses your hand when you both meet and bid goodbye to each other.

If Dazai ever sees you and Oda share a kiss, he’s cheering in his mind. Whereas Chuuya just brushes it off with an unnoticeable upwards twitch of his lips and an eye roll.

Once, you spotted Oda talking to Dazai outside under the moonlight. You knew the former was telling the teen about the right thing to do. Dazai had expressed his want of being involved in some well known group.

He hinted a little about maybe being a detective or even following Oda’s footsteps of going to the mafia. You really didn’t want him to go with the second option, but at least he’d have Oda to guide him if he’s even alive at that time

Thus, he’s told to prioritize other people’s happiness over his own. It’s tough, but it’s for the better of everyone.

He also says the same to Chuuya, but he goes into more detail with Dazai. You mainly handle Chuu with the lectures since he’s more likely to take your words to heart.

Chuuya has great friends in school, they seem like a lovely bunch, and you trust them. You’ve met them before and they were very nice.

Dazai doesn’t have as many, but you can tell he’s not really clicking with them like Chuuya is with his own. When his mood seems to lower, you go to him when he’s alone and you two cuddle. You can faintly pick up the sound of sniffles and feel your clothing moisten. After the session, you two don’t mention it because you know Dazai doesn’t want to remember that.

With any trauma, you take them to therapy. If it’s affecting either kid negatively, they need to talk about it. Initially, they talk to you, but they go see a professional of that doesn’t work.

Academically, the two of them are good. Dazai’s grades are always A’s even if he procrastinates or doesn’t seem to get his work done.

Chuuya usually gets B’s, but his PE is the best with an A+. He signs up for any sports the school offers if he’s interested.

Dazai’s lowest grade is PE, around a C because he’s not athletic like Chuuya.

Both Dazai and Chuuya have the same PE class and teacher, but their participation and effort are the opposite.

“Okay, everyone needs to do fifteen seconds of push-ups and fifteen sit-ups, let’s go! Get started!” The teacher instructed. They were walking around their class in the gym, ensuring everyone was doing what they were told.

They noticed a student lying face down next to the wall and when they walked by, they pointed at him and asked, “Who is that?”

Chuuya heard their inquiry and answered, “Dazai.”

The teacher was silent for a second before focusing back on the other students, “Let’s go! You should be on the next exercise now!”

Whenever there’s a fundraiser, they’re begging you to please donate so they can get a prize.

“Pleeeaaassseee? You can get a refrigerator stuffed with $200! Or even an iPad!” Dazai’s giving you the puppy eye(s) [depends if he’s bandaged his eye or not] and Chuuya is hugging you and kissing your cheek. “We love you so much, can you pretty please with a cherry on top donate? We’ll pay you back!” (They don’t make money, nor do they have an allowance.)

When it comes to projects, Dazai always waits until the last minute.

“Hey, can we go to the store and buy supplies? I have a project.” He whispered to you.

“Huh...?” You were woken up by him at whatever the time was, so you rubbed your eyes and sat up. Oda was still asleep beside you, a peaceful expression on his face. You kept your voice to not disturb him, “What?” When you checked the time, it was 2 am.

“I need some things for my science project,” Dazai was just standing by your bed, with big eyes, looking as though he had thrown up.

“When’s it due?”

“Tomorrow.” You frowned at that.

“Sorry bud, can’t help you. It’s too late, why aren’t you in bed?”

“I had to work on my project and other assignments,” he shifted in his spot and awkwardly averted his eyes. “I only need two things, glitter markers and a poster board.”

You stared at him tiredly, before sighing. “What happened to the ones I bought at the beginning of school?”

“I lost them.”

You blinked, unmoving. “And you can’t borrow Chuuya’s?”

He shook his head, saying they weren’t what he needed. At last, you moved the covers off your body and made your way to the closet. “Fine, go get ready. You should be thankful I’m even entertaining this idea.”

Dazai silently cheered and sped to his room. Why were you so lenient with these children? They’re gonna be spoiled.

His project was claiming that potatoes can power up devices. A stupid as it sounds, he somehow makes it convincing until it’s actually tested and obviously it doesn’t work. But he still gets a passing grade for the effort.

During one of their classes, Chuuya asked to go to the bathroom and ten minutes later when the teacher was about to ask about his location, he comes back with a lunch tray.

“Where’d you get that?” “I look like a sixth grader.”

He just munched away as everyone stared at him confused before they got back to the lesson.

Another time, the teacher left the room for a few minutes. Since Dazai wondered what their coffee tasted like, he waltzed over to the desk and took a sip and immediately spat it out.

“Ugh! It tastes like shit!” When the teacher came back, the whole class silently agreed to stay quiet and not tell on him.

When it was around Halloween and everyone could wear a costume, Dazai wore a squirrel suit. He brought an acorn prop and clipped it to the front of his pants. When walking up to the stage for the best costume contest, he hit the acorn with his legs, playing with it, until it accidently hit his balls and he crouched to the floor in pain. Of course, the guys winced at it, but it was pretty funny. Someone, Chuuya probably, yelled out, “He busted a nut!”

More nonsense, pantsing sometimes occurred. And Chuuya was the unfortunate target for Dazai. He had snuck up behind the former, and yanked down his pants. Regrettably, Dazai’s fingers also caught onto the waistband of the undergarments and when it came down, he got a face full of balls.

He was so traumatized despite being the one to commit the act.

Food fights can also happen. While Chuuya was peacefully eating his lunch, Dazai threw a tomato slice at him and the fruit made a satisfying splat! on Chuuya’s cheek.

He also tried to throw cheese, but he missed and it landed in the hair of someone who was just walking by. (And somehow did not get in trouble).

For presentations, Chuuya had to do an audio recording, and Dazai just sneezed at the beginning of it, He recorded another but when uploading the audio files, he accidently clicked the sneeze one. Presentation day was funny, but Chuuya didn’t necessarily like it.

If they had online school, Chuuya would be talking to the camera before a ball smack his face. He falls out of frame, and Dazai is just seen running in the background.

There are also interviews or random school news done by the student council. They hate having to work with Dazai and Chuuya together because they always argue. The one time the video went right was when Chuuya had a voice crack.

Rallies also happen, and students would have to cheer as loud as they can for their team. Chuuya and Dazai are the loudest, but they also suffer from voice cracks. After the rally, they lose their voice for about a day.

Rocketry is an elective, and there’s a weird Russian kid named Fyodor. Both the boys don’t really like him. Since he’s associated with rats (Kids call him Rat), they wanted to get a rat plushie. They asked you if you could get them a rat plushie. You decided to buy it for them, not knowing why they actually wanted it.

They taped the plush to the rocket, put more power into it, and they launched it into the air. When it blasted off, they looked at Fyodor with threatening stares.

Occasionally, you and Oda would volunteer to help with some school activities. The first time both of you arrived, so many students had a crush on either of you. They’d go to Chuuya/Dazai and whisper “That’s your parent?”

Oda’s a dilf and you’re also a milf/dilf.

What a happy family you lot are.

[squeakadeeks]

What exactly do you "do"? I've tried to piece it together? Something involving whiteboards, and chemicals, and compressed air, and a thimble??????

theyre just paying me to crawl in between the pipes man

but the real answer is i'm a physics grad student. what that entails is i have to take grad level physics courses/pass for certain candidacy exams, do research work in a lab (in particular i work with ultra high vacuum systems and cryogenics for superconducting materials) but i actually get paid through teaching. I have to take classes and do research to get my phd, but if i want to afford rent i have to teach haha.

that is also why i talk about work so much, i basically have to work 40 hours in the lab, on top of 20+ hours of teaching physics classes, and then stack my own classes and exam prep on top of it. its really tough and its a lot of moving pieces. but i guess on one hand at least i'm getting paid in grad school which isnt something all programs offer. Its like if you want to see a phd youre gonna have to work alongside your degree 100%, its just either youre taking out an additional job like is common for law and medical schools, or are still working for the university haha.

[cuntyqueerleondraisaitl]

I can so see how Eddies current storyline could lead into his coming out arc in season eight, and possibly Buddie canon

He breaks up with Marisol because ... obviously. He cheated on her.

He breaks up with Kim because he's looking for what he had with Shannon. But Kim only looks like Shanon. She isn't and she will never actually be her. This could take one episode or a few episodes, ut Eddie is eventually going to find out, yet again. that he won't be able to replicate his relationship with Shannon with anyone.

His relationship with the rest of the 118 is strained by his cheating, leaving him feeling 'Isolated', maybe with an episode or two left in season seven. But Buck stays by his side for another episode. What eventually causes Buddie divorce #3 is that Eddie starts doing what Buck was doing In season one. Sleeping with a different woman every night in order to try and find his person. AKA; a Shannon carbon copy who he will never find.

While Buck understands, he leaves Eddie to his own devices at the end of season seven. it's not exactly a fight, but while Buck understands what Eddie is going through, he also understands it's not the best way to go about it. He tells Eddie that when he's ready, Buck will be there for him.

Season eight begins a few months later, and Eddie is still trying in vain to find a Shannon replacement. Buck is still giving him space. Finally, after an exceptionally bad night with a woman, he comes knocking on Buck's door, and just breaks down. He starts talking about how he doesn't understand why he can't have what he had with Shannon, and he doesn't understand why he can't replicate that experience, or find a woman who makes him happy in the way she did. And Buck just holds him while he cries.

Eventually, Buck tells him that maybe now just isn't the time for him to find someone. So they decide to go to a bar and just hang out for bit. Both of them get a bit drunk, and Eddie starts getting hit on by some guy, and to his surprise, he starts flirting back. And it feels so much more natural. He's been doing the same thing with a different woman every other night for months but it just feels so different and so right.

So, with a few surprised looks from Buck, they keep flirting. They go back to his place, and then in the morning, Eddie rushes to Buck's house, pounds on his door and speedruns his entire sexuality crisis on his couch.

Maybe this guy sticks around, maybe he doesn't, but either way, Eddie is finally coming into himself.

Buck and Tommy break up, amicably. Maybe its just an issue with scheduling, or maybe Tommy moves somewhere else (Tommy spinoff??? 👀👀👀) But they end on good terms

Then, last episode of season eight,, they're sitting on Buck's couch, eating his lasagna that they finally perfected. They're talking to each other about life, about how their relationships never seem to work out but now they feel like they're closer than ever to finding one that sticks. They make eye contact and boom. Something clicks between them. Cannon Buddie with the last scene of season eight.

Season 9A secret dating arc

Season 9B "we fucking called it" arc with the 118

Season 10 A domestic fucking bliss. Maybe Tommy comes back and he and Buck are best friends because they ended super amicably and Eddie's a bit jealous for like one episode.

Season 10B, Domestic fucking Bliss part two, but they're moved in together, proposal in the finale

Season 11, Wedding.

[the12thnightproject]

Title: Help Wanted

Event: Mayday Heyday OC Exchange 2024 organized by @lorei-writes and @olivermorningstar

Giftee: @fighting-and-drawing

OC/Fandom: Thai Bulan / Ikemen Sengoku

Genre: Urban Fantasy AU

Warnings: Very Large Spider, some violence (involving said arachnid)

Word Count: 1500

See notes/dedications at end

As the sun sunk, building shadows elongated, creating patches of darkness on narrow, meandering streets. Parts of the city had been planned; every road numbered and set out in a precise grid. This was not one of those parts. If anyone planned out the Echigo district, they had done so by tossing noodles onto a map and putting the streets where they landed.

Thai was following their progress on a phone app, and wondered if his driver actually knew where to go. At least once the Uber doubled back, taking a longer, indirect route. As a precaution, Thai made an obvious show of texting the driver’s information to “a friend” (his own cloud account).

In truth, there were no friends to wonder or worry if he disappeared into a void, never to return.

Too many things had disappeared for him this year, the most pressing being a promised job, the one he had uprooted his life for. He’d travelled over 1000 miles, only to discover the job no longer existed. The entire company no longer existed – it had fallen victim to a takeover by Oda International, then dismantled. All previous employees were fired, all pending job offers rescinded.

Now trapped in a new country, with unpaid moving expenses, a dwindling bank account, and no solution for either, he was desperate for work… any kind. Having burned his bridges back home, in fact, having firebombed those bridges, he –

Screech!

The Uber slammed to a stop in the middle of the street, nearly garroting Thai with his own seatbelt. “Get out.” The driver flicked the automatic locks. “Now.”

He checked his phone. “We’re nowhere near-“

“Get out, or ride back to the city with me, but this car goes no further. Not here. Not after sunset.” The driver pulled a thick cudgel out from under the seat. “Yokai. It’s not worth my life to drive through the district.”

No use arguing with superstition. Grumbling to himself, Thai climbed out, then leaped for the gutter as the car zoomed away. He was surprised it hadn’t taken his leg off with it when it sped into the night.

The lights and press of the city’s humanity were far behind. Here in this strange neighborhood, the sounds were alien. No traffic hum or buzz of neon, just a steady drip drip drip of thick liquid onto pavement. The road was gritty, he could feel tiny grains of gravel and dirt slipping under his feet. A stench of rotting garbage hung in the air, dense, motionless, as if not even the wind would dare come to this place. Even the graffiti was different: its colors sharper, appearing bioluminescent, glowing talismans against evil.

Or warnings.

No… he was being fanciful. The driver’s obvious fear had gotten into his head. He wasn’t a big man, but he moved with strength and purpose. He wasn’t worth attacking, was not, even in his best interview outfit, dressed in a way that would not suggest wealth. Because there was no wealth. Even less now that most of his remaining funds had just sped away with the Uber. He’d have to walk the rest of the way.

At least he was within walking distance, as confirmed by his smartphone’s GPS. The voice of the AI (“Alex,” programmed with a soothing attractive Australian accent) told him to continue along this road another 500 meters.

Good thing I’m still within view of a satellite.

Plonk.

Something wet dripped on him and he squinted up at the tangle of ivy that covered the wall of a warehouse. Ivy? In the middle of the city? No time to investigate, he was already late for the interview. Besides… there was something sinister about that mass of ivy, as if it hid watching eyes.

When, as Alex directed, he turned left at a street so narrow he’d have hesitated to call it a street at all, something skittered past his leg, something furry and malevolent.

Yokai…

It had been a cat. Or… a very large rat (not that that possibility was reassuring).

Still, with Alex giving him updated directions he felt almost comforted. As if the AI was his friend, a non-judgmental friend who would help him navigate the worst of life’s bumps. If only Alex had told him, “Stay in college. Don’t move to a foreign country, don’t break up with -.”

Crash! Thud. Ooof!

“You have arrived, mate.” The AI went silent.

Arrived where?

The noises were coming from the bar on his left. With late summer humidity streaking the window, he’d missed the sign. Kasugayama. Through the fogged glass, he could see two shapes locked in battle.

Anyone might have been forgiven if they’d performed a 500 meter sprint back to relative safety. But acting on instinct, an instinct that he cursed a moment later, Thai ran into the bar. He didn’t know what he’d been expecting. Expectations and instincts did not generally go together. Still, one might have expected a simple bar fight, or a less simple robbery. And not… a spider the size of a pony.

Yokai…

There was probably a more proper name for a spider demon, but Thai’s language skills temporarily deserted him.

Of all the gin joints…

Spiders… why did it have to be spiders?

Why am I thinking in movie quotations?

Fighting the spider was a man who wielded a pool cue as expertly as a spear. But the spider had a six arm advantage and…

Sproing!!!

Holy fuck… it can jump!

That damn instinct took over again and Thai grabbed a chair and threw it at the spider. This had the stunning effect of breaking the chair and getting the thing’s attention. It charged toward him, then screeched when the other man drove the pool cue into its butt.

Now it’s just pissed off.

Taking advantage of the momentary distraction, Thai flipped himself over the bar top, grabbed a bottle from the speed rail, and smashed it on the edge of the sink. The scent of fermented rice mixed with the aromas of spider goo and blood. The blood belonged to a rather nasty looking slash on the man’s leg. The spider goo was … well, obvious.

At the sound of the breaking glass, the spider scuttled toward him again, a glare of uncanny intelligence in its red eyes. Thai slashed furiously with his improvised weapon, drawing more goo from the spider, and dammit, there was a paring knife right there on the garnish station.

The spider jumped to the bar top, stretching out a spindly leg (arm?) toward him. Thai switched the bottle to his other hand, grabbed the knife, and slammed it down on the arm/leg, severing it at a joint. The limb snapped off with a sickening crunch and slid halfway across the room. The spider emitted a high-pitched shriek, then the other man drove the pool cue through its head.

It twitched three times, then went still.

In the sudden silence, Thai could hear himself and the other man breathing.

Later, he might think back and take in details – the man’s warm brown eyes, the feel of the sticky floor under his feet and the flicker and hum of fluorescent lights. But the instinct that drove him into this place took over again. While the other man retrieved a well-used first aid kit and treated the slash on his leg, Thai soothed his jangled, spider-hating nerves with the ritual of cleaning. Wipe down the bar top. Sterilize the knife. Sweep up the glass…

Noticing the pool cue samurai was eyeing a bottle of iichiko Shochu, Thai poured him a glass, adding blood orange juice, tonic water and ice when prompted.

Finally the other guy spoke. “No idea why you came crashing in like a wild boar, but… thanks.” The blunt speech was softened with a wry smile.

“Job interview? Advertisement for a barback?” Thai unearthed his phone, getting ready to pull up the confirmation email. “I’m Thai Bulan.”

“Oh, shit.” The other man raked his hands through a mop of sweat-soaked brown hair. “It completely went out of my head. Sanada Yukimura.” He bowed. “Any chance you still want the job?”

It had been listed as minimum salary, but it did come with the mention of a studio apartment above the bar. “Um.” Thai indicated the spider. “Is that what happened to the previous barback?”

“No. This… was new. Never seen one those in here before.” Yukimura took a deep breath. “The last guy quit. Kasugayama’s owner is a bit… unique.”

Then, with what might have been called perfect timing, the front door opened and a man with heterochromatic eyes entered and surveyed the scene. He eyed the dead spider. “Good. I was in the mood for takeout.”

He pulled a sword out of the scabbard on his waist and cleanly sliced off a limb. Then, gnawing on it like it was a turkey leg and he was some medieval king, he disappeared into a back office.

Thai took the job.

Thank you @lorei-writes and @olivermorningstar for organizing this event (and it was super organized with check ins and google docs and everything I could ask for. If they ever do another event, jump at the chance to join).

To @fighting-and-drawing , I really hope I have done Thai justice. Heart of The Warrior has been one of my favorite Ikemen Sengoku fanfics (I've read it more than once), and I was thrilled when I learned you were the giftee. I'm not nearly as confident writing fight scenes though, so I hope it made sense. And yes, I was the anon who asked you what Yukimura might order in a modern bar (and then had to figure out whether he would still drink a sweet cocktail after killing a giant spider).

To anyone else reading this, I encourage anyone interested in reading a fantastically well written, well researched Ikesen longfic to read Heart of The Warrior either here or here

[jaysnunchucks]

Random ninja headcanons

Warnings: this contains talk about mental health, death and violence

- I’ve said this before and I’ll say it again, they’re major adrenaline junkies, especially Kai and Jay

- all of them have had mental breakdowns in middle of the night and just cried

- They all have major trust issues, I mean just look at how Lloyd was doubting Sora in DR S1

- They definitely have movie nights together

- Cole feels unlovable since the rest of the ninja have met someone who loves them, but then he met Geo

- sometimes they share traumas and help each other get through traumas

- I feel like they all have this one fear, which is that the team starts to break apart and everyone just moves on with their lives

- Lloyd sees Kai as his older brother and Nya as his old sister, the siblings he never had

- They all think they’re not good enough for each other

- Lloyd feels responsible every time one of the ninja get hurt, die or get banished to unknown realms

- When they can’t control their anger especially Kai and Lloyd, they try to get away from others, either train in the courtyard of the monastery or try to find bad guys to beat up

- They actually care about their friends and allies a lot, I can imagine Cole, Kai or Jay thinking about how Faith and the other hunters are doing

- Cole actually loved Nya, but when Jay and Nya got together, he accepted it and moved on, but deep down he always has loved and always will love Nya

- Harumi really broke Lloyd’s spirit, so much he doesn’t believe real love exists anymore

- Kai has imagined how he’s future with skylor would look like

- Whenever Zane feel a wave of strong emotions come on, he turns off his emotions or talks to Pixal about it

- Kai feels responsible for Lloyd, ever since he saved Lloyd from that volcano, he has always felt responsible whenever something happened to him

- Cole loves cake, not because of its flavour but because every time he eats cake he is reminded how good life can be

- Aspheera left Kai with a trauma for his whole life, how he felt useless and couldn’t help

- Pixal and Nya have girl dates, where they can just relax and do skincare and talk about boys and all the stuff girls do

- Kai really hates selfish people, because it reminds him of himself when he was younger

- They shut each other out when things get hard but Wu has tried to teach them that their a team and they should deal with it together

- Lloyd always think lesser of himself because his father is one of the greatest villains in Ninjago history

[mumms-the-word]

Illithid Souls - Part 2

The Case Studies: Tav/Durge and Orpheus

In Part 1, I went over some of the basics of what a soul normally is, where souls go after death, and whether mind flayers have souls. I ultimately ended up saying that most humanoids have apostolic souls (souls that deities recognize as being capable of divine worship), while mind flayers have some other kind of soul, one that isn't recognizable by deities or devils. This is why Jergal and Mystra and so on think that illithid don’t have souls. When a humanoid with an apostolic soul turns into a mind flayer, their soul is either ejected and moves on to the Fugue Plane, or their soul is transformed into a non-apostolic soul (depending on what you want to believe).

But the problem is, that's normal lore, and BG3 has made things a little strange by imbuing all the tadpoles that infect our characters with Netherese magic. And that, friends, makes the BG3 mind flayers different.

This post is going to look at some interesting context from the game for the Emperor, Tav/Durge and Orpheus. (It got pretty long so I'm moving Karlach and Gale to a third post.) We're going to figure out whether the rules about mind flayers and souls change now that there's Netherese magic involved. The ultimate answer is yes, but how? And is it consistent?

(Spoiler: it isn't, but you can use this lore to come up with your own theories and ideas)

Let's take another deep dive! Buckle up, and don't worry, I have a short summary at the bottom.

The Case of the Emperor

I'm actually not going to linger too long on the Emperor because for many reasons he breaks the lore. If he's Balduran and a mind flayer, he shouldn't have lived as long as he says he's lived. Not only that, his memory is allegedly flawless when the lore states he shouldn't remember any of his previous life (there are other inconsistencies too, but that's a different post). However, I do want to touch on a couple of things.

The Emperor both is and isn't our baseline for how a mind flayer normally exists. He should be a normal lore-accurate mind flayer (though a rogue one), because he wasn't infected with a Netherese-touched tadpole. But he's a Special Mind Flayer instead, for reasons we don't entirely understand (again, he generally breaks the lore). Perhaps this is because of his brush with Gortash and the other Chosen of the Dead Three, or perhaps he just somehow has a strong enough personality that when he broke free of an elder brain's compulsion a lot of his memories came back to him. Who knows?

But regardless, a few conversations with him reinforce the idea that mind flayers typically aren't completely soulless. At the very least, they still contain memories (he has his memories of his time as Balduran), intelligence (he's a schemer, that's for sure), and personality/emotions:

Emperor: You think that mind flayers are soulless husks who feel nothing. Belynne thought the same at first. You are wrong. Feeling is vital to the pursuit of anyone's goals. Even a mind flayer's. Like you, mind flayers know fear. Like you, we crave recognition. But unlike you, unlike the others of my kind, I am no slave to either. My end is and has always been freedom.

We can quibble about whether or not he's manipulating the player here, but his words are generally true. As discussed in part 1, mind flayers are not soulless husks. When they're enthralled, they might be more devoid of independent thinking, but they have emotions/feelings and can create memories. They just might have a smaller range of emotion than humanoids do (thus his reference to "not being a slave" to fear or desire) and their memories might not be entirely their own (more on that with Karlach in part 3).

Regardless, the Emperor is our leading authority for what it's like to be a mind flayer, so we're sort of forced to trust him when we ask him to explain what full ceremorphosis is about to do to us, especially because its his Supreme Tadpole that is about to change us.

Player: What would happen to me? Emperor: You would be altered in mind, body, and soul beyond all recognition.

So this is interesting. Altered in mind and body, that's a given. Altered in soul, though...what does that mean?

Remember in Part 1 where I offered two theories about what happens to the original soul of someone undergoing ceremorphosis? Theory 1: they just die and the soul moves on to the Fugue Plane, and the mind flayer gets a new illithid soul from...somewhere. Theory 2: The soul transforms and remains tethered to the mind flayer body, different than it was before (potentially unrecognizable as the original soul, but some elements of the original may remain).

The Emperor's words suggest more of theory 2 here. But is that, in fact, what happens when we become illithid? Well...let's find out.

The Case of Tav and Durge (or most Origin runs)

When you do turn into a mind flayer, the narrative typically focuses on how powerful you feel. Your mind and body feel as though they are one and you are also desperately hungry. There isn't much in the Narrator's dialogue or your dialogue with your friends to suggest that your soul has been completely obliterated, though.

In fact, there's an interesting moment that happens if you turn into a mind flayer without the Emperor there and go up to Orpheus still in his cage. The way I accomplished this was to ask to change into a mind flayer so the Emperor would give me the Supreme Tadpole, then I said I would change later, then stopped the Emperor from consuming Orpheus so he would leave. Then I used the Supreme Tadpole to turn into a mind flayer and went to examine Orpheus.

Narrator: *His eyes are unseeing, his voice silenced. But even with his mind caged, you can feel his power. You can almost taste the fluid beneath his scalp, cushioning that sweet, dense brain, and the power within it. You are hungry.* Lae'zel: I see that look, I know that look. Don't you dare. Player: [Wisdom Check] Cling to your former nature. Quash your hunger. This is not who you are. Narrator: *Your mind and body whine with disappointment. But your soul lets out a gentle thrum of relief.*

I find this fascinating for a couple of reasons. One, the check I chose (there are two, the second is a strength check) meant reaching out to a "former" nature and reminding myself (or my Tav's self) that this is not who she is. When I succeeded, my Tav's mind and body protested, but her soul was filled with relief.

So she has a soul! And it seems to be her own soul, but perhaps transformed. So this sort of supports theory 2, that perhaps when humanoids turn into mind flayers, their soul is altered. This could also just be a quirk specific to those infected with a Netherese tadpole, or even further, someone who transformed using the Emperor's Supreme Tadpole.

Because here's the thing. When Tav/Durge, Orpheus, Companion!Karlach, or any Origin character transforms into a mind flayer using the Supreme Tadpole, they become a special mind flayer. This is mostly due to the Netherese magic, which adds some weird and undefined changes to the whole mind flayer thing. I'm going to use "I guess it's the Netherese magic/Supreme Tadpole" as a scapegoat this entire post because I don't know what else to point to to explain how these guys are just Different Than Your Average Mind Flayer, so be prepared for that. But at the very least, we know something's different.

In fact the Narrator literally says you're probably different than the average mind flayer after you defeat the Netherbrain!

Narrator: *You are a mind flayer, the very thing you sought to eradicate. Whatever self you still possess is quickly ebbing away. Your friends and enemies alike are ripe for manipulation, and if not manipulation, then consumption. Soon you will be able to trust yourself at all. You will be a monstrosity beyond redemption. Or not. Perhaps you are unique among illithid-kind. Perhaps you will retain enough of who you are to resist your nature. A rogue mind flayer. Like the Emperor. The risk is certainly yours to take - will you?*

Unlike normal mind flayers who lose most of their memories (and allegedly most of their personality/former selves) almost immediately after transforming, it takes Tav/Durge/most Origins longer to lose that sense of self, if indeed they lose it at all. The Narrator suggests we might be losing parts of ourselves, but there's a chance we're unique and might retain our sense of selves.

We do see glimpses of us retaining our personalities in the epilogue of course, but what is more interesting is if you decide to imprison yourself post-ceremorphosis. Withers will visit you in prison for a final conversation. (This conversation shifts a little if you're a Durge, but here is the Tav conversation.)

Withers: Thou remainest in thy chains. A hero, sacrificed. I told thee once that an illithid hath no soul, and yet...something glimmerest about thee. Something is not lost. Dost thou feel it? The spark of the divine within thee? Or does thy hunger consume thee? Player: [Option 1] I'm still myself. I don't know if I belong here. Player: [Option 2] I feel the hunger. But I feel myself, too. I'm not sure which to trust. Player: [Option 3] Have you come to torment me with hypotheticals, old friend? Player: [Option 4] Does it matter? This is my life now.

If you go with option 4, you hear Withers ponderingly say, "Thy life...yes..." before moving on to say that fate isn't done with you yet, which is his response to all the other options as well.

But the more important thing is that even Jergal recognizes a "spark of the divine" within you. Your soul should either be cast off and already wandering the Fugue Plane (if going with theory 1) or so completely transformed that it's no longer an apostolic soul that Jergal would be able to recognize as a god. Yet Jergal recognizes the soul within your mind flayer body as being...well, partly apostolic.

Interesting!

We get a similar dialogue if you sacrifice yourself as a mind flayer, too, though this is fascinating because now it's Withers literally finding your soul (still shaped like a mind flayer, which is interesting) somewhere that is...very gray. There's a suggestion that this might be in the Fugue Plane, or in some limbo state where souls sometimes end up, but regardless, Withers, the soul-finder himself, was able to track down your lingering soul.

Withers: Thou flickerest in the dark - but with mine keen eye, I hath scryed thee. I told thee once that an illithid hath no soul, and yet thou seemest to have something of the spirit about thee. I cannot account for it. How delightful. Tell me, how doth it feel to roam about as thou art now, transformed? Player: [Option 1] Where am I? [mumm's note: he basically doesn't answer this question lol] Player: [Option 2] I still feel like myself. My memories, my feelings - all intact. Withers: No matter how many aeons I have roamed this world and beyond, I am ever-surprised by mysteries new and old.

Even Withers is surprised that the soul you have is something he not only recognizes as a soul, but as your soul. I love how amused and intrigued he sounds when he says "I cannot account for it. How delightful." He even smiles when he says it. He thinks you're super neat! And also a new phenomenon.

(As an aside, I wonder if you being mind-flayer-shaped but still recognizable as you is a hint that your soul did indeed transform to be illithid, but didn't fully transform into a non-apostolic soul like normal illithids would. Like, I wonder if your soul is now half-apostolic and just permanently mind-flayer-shaped. RIP. But this would explain why bringing you back via True Resurrection is kind of a nonviable option since you'd just come back as a mind flayer, and this is the ending where you took your own life to avoid being a mind flayer for forever, so I doubt you'd even want to come back if you couldn't come back to your original body. Things to ponder!)

Anyway, you having something that has glimpses, sparks, or hints of the divine/the spirit about you does tell us that as a mind flayer, your soul wasn't destroyed. It may have been transformed, but you're not as soulless as you thought you were going to be, and you're actually still pretty close to being who you were before the transformation.

Close, but not perfectly or exactly like you were before. You did transform, after all. But these changes become more obvious in other examples, such as with Karlach.

You having a partly-apostolic soul that retains all its memories and most of its original personality is obviously VERY unique and different to what most mind flayers experience. For example, if you turn yourself illithid and then free Orpheus (again, see the same steps above, but go a step farther and actually free him this time), then Orpheus will be utterly shocked that you're capable of independent thought.

Orpheus: What is this... A mind flayer in possession of its mental faculties? This is the stuff of fables. It is as if I am reliving the legend of Oryndoll. You are the illithid Urengol, rebelling against your own hivemind. And I am the noble githyanki Valraag who must now reconsider his position. An illithid capable of rebelling against the Netherbrain's instruction... Not only capable but willing... If your intentions are as righteous as they seem, this is an advantage I cannot overlook. An advantage that must be grasped, for our enemy is formidable indeed. Very well. I propose an alliance.

A couple of notes here: Oryndoll is/was a real mind flayer colony far, far below the surface in the southern regions of Faerûn (beneath the Shining Plains). Not only is it ancient, but the wealth of knowledge stored inside via illithid technology rivals and probably even surpasses that of Candlekeep's library. There's at least one book in the game that talks about a foolish drow adventurer searching for Oryndoll, only to end up a mind flayer, while another hints at Oryndoll's role in the history of the Duergar race. But these are the only mentions of Oryndoll in the game.

Oryndoll has a history in D&D lore, but there's no mention of Urengol and Valraag (that I could find). If this is a fable Orpheus knows, it's apparently so ancient that only he remembers it. But that itself is interesting, because it makes Urengol his closest reference to you having become a rogue, independently-thinking, and emotionally driven mind flayer. He can't think of any other examples, that's how unique you are.

The most important thing here is that Orpheus literally considers your independently thinking self as so baffling, so impossible, it should only exist in fables. That, I think, says a lot.

The next question is, does he think he would become just as unique?

The Case of Orpheus

We all know Orpheus can be convinced to turn into a mind flayer and sacrifice his soul for his people. I'm sure he genuinely does think he is sacrificing his soul, as there is no real precedent that he or anyone else seems to know of for a person who turns into a mind flayer and keeps their soul (or at least keeps their same memories, personality, and intelligence). But if he's surprised that he's kept all his memories after turning illithid, he doesn't really show it.

You can ask him about it, of course, after he's turned into a mind flayer and after you've defeated the Netherbrain. His response is kind of interesting.

Player: You're a mind flayer, but you're still you, aren't you? Orpheus: Yes. But for how long? My mind screams. It will never stop until it has slipped away from me entirely.

No one else seems to define their illithid experience this way. I'm curious if his mind screaming is referring to the hunger he feels, the same hunger he is actively trying to resist, but he doesn't elaborate on this. Regardless, he's certain that while he has retained his personality (and probably his soul) for now, it's not going to last.

This is why he asks for an honorable death after the defeat of the Netherbrain.

Player: You don't deserve to die. Orpheus: I will not be ghaik! I did what I did to save my people. [...] The rest is up to them. Someone else must rise within the ranks to lead the revolution against Vlaakith. Give me my freedom from this form, release my soul to the Astral Seas while I still have one to call my own.

Orpheus believes that he only has a temporary grasp on his soul or consciousness, which may or may not have transformed into a different kind of soul. Then again, if he thinks his soul is going to the Astral Seas, maybe it doesn't matter whether his soul was transformed from apostolic to non-apostolic. I'm not even sure if githyanki have apostolic souls at all, since they wouldn't really be interested in the deities that govern matters on the Material Plane. I mean, for a long time Lae'zel wants her soul to be eaten by Vlaakith (a literal lich queen who eats souls) via "ascension" so...

I also have no idea if his soul, once released to the Astral Seas, would be mind-flayer-shaped. I guess that's the great mystery. I would assume yes, but I also don’t know how souls manifest in the Astral Seas and finding sources on this has been difficult (it all boils down to “ask your DM”).

Orpheus can be convinced to stay alive and just hang out in a far-off "corner of these realms" to watch his people fight against Vlaakith from afar, and there's kind of a hint that him agreeing to do this means he isn't actually afraid he'll lose his entire soul. But at this point, we're getting too far into "maybes" and "what ifs" to suggest anything concrete.

Quick picture break of Orpheus contemplating the Supreme Tadpole to break up the text (I just thought it was a good shot)

Now I do have to acknowledge two things about Orpheus: one, he could be a special mind flayer precisely because of his unique abilities to shield his mind from elder brain compulsion, which means his unique abilities could also be the reason why he retains so much of his personality and therefore his soul. Since most of the time you end up eating his brain and absorbing his abilities, this could also explain why you retain so much of your own soul if you become a mind flayer instead.

In this scenario, you’re a special mind flayer because (1) you have a Netherese tadpole, (2) you transformed using the Supreme Tadpole, and (3) then you ate Orpheus’s brain. All three elements could be at play.

But not everyone eats Orpheus’s brain, so that theory has holes. I genuinely think you just end up being a special mind flayer because of the Netherese magic that messes with your tadpole. The Supreme Tadpole plus Orpheus’s abilities would only be the icing on the cake, so to speak.

The second thing I want to acknowledge is that there’s a glaring plothole for Orpheus even turning into a mind flayer at all, if you play the game a certain way. If you send the Emperor away to free Orpheus before the Emperor gives you the Supreme Tadpole (for example if you send Lae’zel over to smash the chains holding Orpheus captive without talking to the Emperor, which is what I did one time, and the Emperor was literally like “don’t talk to me again bye” and left), then how does he turn into a mind flayer? He doesn’t have a tadpole and you don’t have the Supreme Tadpole to give to him.

He gets around this with you or Karlach by saying he’ll lower his mental shields so that your tadpole hears the Netherbrain’s orders to transform and then replace the shields again.

Orpheus: My defences keep the voice of the Absolute out, but just as I can raise them, so I can lower them. I will allow the voice of the Absolute in. Once it reaches you, it will order you to transform. It will only take a moment. And once you are a mind flayer, I will fold you under my protection once more. You will be the saviour of empires, not least my own. Narrator: *With the withdrawal of Orpheus' power, your mind is rushed with the full force of the Netherbrain. You feel a compulsion unlike anything you've ever known - excruciating and exhilarating in equal measure. You wish nothing in the world but to evolve. Then - complete silence, as you are once again closed off from the Netherbrain's mind.*

So that makes sense, and it means you being a special mind flayer could boil down to your personality being hella strong + you being infected with a special Netherese tadpole. In this scenario, the Supreme Tadpole can’t be used to explain your unique soul-keeping abilities, and neither can you attribute your soul-keeping abilities to consuming Orpheus's brain (since he's still alive). So maybe the Supreme Tadpole and/or Orpheus's brain doesn’t have any effect on why you keep your mostly-unaltered soul.

In the end I guess it’s just the weird Netherese tadpole that does the trick? Honestly, I wonder if it all boils down to the fact that the Netherese tadpole doesn't eat your brain, it just lies dormant and incubating in your head, so you're not losing brain matter. (But this ignores or forgets that when you eat other tadpoles you literally watch them burrow into your brain matter so I'm sure the magic has something to do with it too.)

But anyway this still doesn’t explain why Orpheus, who shouldn’t have a tadpole, somehow turns into a mind flayer by, I don’t know, manifesting it??? Or why he is also a unique mind flayer once he does this without the Supreme Tadpole. I mean in his case I’m sure it is because he has special mind shield abilities but still. How did he turn into a mind flayer without a tadpole? Make it make sense, Larian.

He literally just touches his head with a psionic magic effect, which is the same gesture he uses to lower his mental shield to allow the Netherbrain to force you to transform. It's also interesting that if you have him transform using the Supreme Tadpole, then he doesn't say anything as he accepts the tadpole from you and absorbs it. But if you have him change without the tadpole, then he says, "The Netherbrain will be only too pleased to claim me."

Which...kind of implies that he's somehow able to communicate with the Netherbrain or hear its voice, so...maybe he secretly does have a tadpole? I mean, a popular theory is the Emperor probably did tadpole Orpheus off-screen since he seems to have a level of compulsion over Orpheus, but this is never explained or mentioned in the game so do whatever you want with that theory.

But I digress.

Let's do a quick summary, shall we?

TLDR: You're probably a super special mind flayer who gets to keep their soul mostly intact (or mostly unaltered) because your tadpole was imbued with Netherese magic and generally doesn't eat your brain. You might also be super special because you transformed using the Supreme Tadpole (optional) and/or consumed Orpheus's brain (also optional). Orpheus might be a super special mind flayer simply because he's Orpheus, and that is why he can still retain most of his soul/personality, even though he keeps thinking he's going to lose it. His status as special mind flayer seems unchanged whether he transformed using the Supreme Tadpole or not, so it really must be an Orpheus Thing.

Phew. That was a lot. And honestly, Karlach and Gale only complicate things, so they're going in a separate post. Keep an eye out for Part 3!

~*~*~

You made it to the end!!! Amazing, you deserve an achievement or something, but all I have are more gold stars.

✨⭐️🌟⭐️✨⭐️🌟⭐️✨

Tags for those who wanted the update! @galesdevoteewife @stuffforthestash

[blu3haw4]

When I'm drunk, I get the munchies so how about "what do you want to eat? Bend over"

Oh anon thank you! That was so quick sorry im so slow. I wrote the beginning of this the same night, a bit yesterday while hang over, and just now finished it 😬

I must admit i had to think it throught (let's say translations weren't working in my brain) but here it goes. This is maybe a part of my stripper/CEO wip:

It has been a long day. For the both of them, in very different ways for each, but oh so endlessly long.

There was only one thing in Lexa's mind when she walked into her girlfriend's apartment. -A place so much smaller than her penthouse, but so much more comfortable. A place that felt much more like home than the place she called that for years. - Clarke was in the kitchen wearing only an oversized t-shirt while picking items here and there, moving around the kitchen, deciding then and there what to do.

Lexa had a key, she's had it for over four month now and she loved to use it. She loved the feeling of coming home to her girlfriend. Specially when said girlfriend insist on trying to 'help out' on stressful days full of meeting and sending thousands of provakative pictures, just to then pretend as though those hadn't been sent. Continuing on their previous conversation like nothing happened.

Lexa's underwear has been ruined since noon.

It was currently 9pm.

"Hey baby! Welcome home!"

There was a 'how was your day' hidden in there, but Lexa could sense Clarke bitting her lip. She knew what she had done.

Lexa didn't respond, she just walked into the living room, methodically putting away her suitcase and different bags of folders she brought from work. She took long enough for Clarke to walk out of the kitchen looking for her.

"Long day, beautiful?" Clarke asked Lexa, moving her hands up to her shoulder and turning her around for a greeting kiss.

Those hands moved further back to play with the baby hairs in the back of Lexa's neck as Clarke pulled them closer in the kiss.

Lexa didn't resist. How could she?

Lexa chased -she always did- and pulled at Clarke's hips to drag her closer even if she hadn't moved.

Her hands found their usual spot holding Clarke's hips and she let herself get lost in the kiss. If there was any doubt of whether her intentions for the night were a shared thought, they got erased when a skilled tongue expertly licked its way into her mouth, colliding and dancing with her own for only a second before Clarke retrieved entirely from the kiss.

"What do you want to eat?" Clarke asked inocent, and Lexa actually wondered if the questions was genuine or flirty.

She didn't really care either way. There was still only one thing in her mind. Only one right answer.

So looking down, Lexa grabbed the edge of Clarke's oversized t-shirt and pulled slightly up, just to check that there was no other barrier she had to take care of.

She licked her lips at the sight and with a breathy exhale she looked up again.

"Bend over"

She ordered, looking at Clarke's deep blue eyes and watched them get swallowed by her dilating pupils.

There was a second of shared breath, no hesitation, only pure anticipation. They moved together, turning in sync while Clarke turned on her own too. Lexa's hand were still over Clarke's hips when she leaned over the side of the couch followed by Lexa's chasing lips.

With her elbows firmly on the cushion and Lexa leaning over her back, kissing her shoulder while pulling her shirt up for a better view, Clarke pushed herself back into her girlfriend's body.

Making her way down through Clarke's back with her lips, Lexa thought of a million things she could say, prize Clarke for her obedience and slide into a little role play, scowl at her about the hundreds of nudes she sent Lexa just that day, profess her love for Clarke and verbally worship her. In the end, she knew her lips would do better not talking.

Once she was kneeled down behind Clarke, worship her ass was a must; she kissed and caressed lovingly and then bit and nibble softly, and then not so softly, teasing, testing how far Clarke would let her go. It was a particularly hard, open-mouthed bite that did it.

"Lex" was let out surprisingly calm and collected from above "no marks" All Lexa did was kiss it better, before moving on to her main objective.

♾️

Hour later laying in bed, laying her head on Clarke's chest Lexa looked down at her heavily marked thighs. There were bruises all from the top of her thigh down and around the inner side. She wasn't so sure but she could see one on her calf too.

"We should go on vacation again" Lexa mused, snuggling into Clarke's neck "Somewhere far, far away. For much longer than last time... y'know, so we give time for your hickeys to fade"

An amused exhale was Clarke's answer.

"I'm serious. We could go to Europe... spend a month or something"

"Bell would fire me if I'm gone for that long"

"That'd be a very unwise business decision. He'd lose 30% of his clientele"

"You really just took my word for it?"

"And Raven's. And Octavia's too, she knows about business. I also witnessed it"

Silence spread after Clarke simply hummed. After a couple minutes, the blonde tasked "You ruin all my plans!"

Offended, slightly amused and a little shocked, Lexa lifted her head to gap at Clarke "I was gonna make you an amazing dinner! And you distracted me"

"I distracted you? You asked me what i wanted to eat! Anything that happened after i was done was purely your doing" Lexa deflected, laying her head down again.

"Uhm, sorry? Was i supposed to... what? Just walk back into the kitchen while you literally started undressing in front of me?"

"I was merely getting comfortable" Lexa shrugged with a smirk clear in her tone. Before Clarke could complain, she lifted her head again "Besides, none of this would've happened if you hadn't sent a million pictures while i was working"

Clarke gasped this time, as Lexa relaxed once more "you ungrateful brat! People pay to see what you complain of having access to"

"Nono, i ain't complaining, I'm merely stating arguments to declare my innocence against your accusations"

Clarke laughed out loud and pulled Lexa up for a kiss "i was gonna make you spaghetti with tomato sauce" she grumbled after.

"We can order it" Lexa whispered, still high from the kiss. Clarke laughed again.

"God! Do you do anything by yourself? No wonder your kitchen is spotless, when was the last time you cooked something?"

"My kitchen is spotless because I have a cleaning team going in twice a week. My room and office i do all by myself, for the record"

Leaning into another kiss Clarke chuckled "no wonder they're so dusty"

Lexa gasped into the kiss, Clarke holding her close "your house is dusty" she grumbled, making Clarke laugh again.

"It is not! I just don't have a cleaning team coming in twice a week"

The couple laughed, freely and lovingly as they continued kissing. Enveloped in the sent of their love making and the sound of their shared happiness, Lexa thanked every and any divinity for the chance to have it with Clarke.

"I love you"

"I love you too, baby"

"So about our trip to Europe-"

"Lexa!"

[aqqleshiqqing-archive]

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[kirby-the-gorb]