#after feeling like my life or other people's lives were in danger at various jobs over the past few years.

[gideonisms]

When the urgency just is not there...when the primal urge to do fuck all takes over...

[heartlilith]

Drunk Confessional (Personal Astrology Observations)

Here are some of my observations and opinions on various placements while sipping on some dranks ;)))

🍻My Sun, Venus, and Mars are in my 8th house using Whole Sign System and using Placidus I have Moon and Venus in the 8th house. Any other 8th housers especially attracted to what others deem creepy/weird/dangerous? Whether it's people, topics of conversation, music taste, or superstitions. When I talk to my boyfriend about what happens after we die, he WON'T hear it. I got an Ouija board for Christmas one year and he wouldn't summon demons with me :( he's so scared lmfaooo. Also, my boyfriend has been to jail, has face tattoos, and is the embodiment of controversial. Any other 8th housers relate? No? Okay.

🍻Going off of ^^^. I met this girl one time at a ... facility ... and she went by the name Lilith; she's instagram famous, goth, loves witch shit, she's a satanist and basically she was everything that people side eyed. When I tell you I LOVED THIS GIRL. I wish we kept in contact, I swear I had heart eyes and I'm straight af. She was so intriguing and we became such good friends... I miss her. She was an Aries Sun, Aries Moon, Scorpio Rising. The coolest chick.

🍻I have 12th Pluto and Chiron (whole sign) and in the 11th house (Placidus) and I ghost everyone. Most times it's unintentional. Due to some issues at home, I up and left my hometown in the middle of the night to live with my boyfriend a couple states away and the next day my friends were like "Wtf? Where are you?".

🍻Guys I am the queen of running away when things get hard. Even when I was young. I'm not really sure what would indicate this? Maybe Uranus/Neptune in the 1st? 12th house Sagittarius? No clue. I'm a master escapist physcially, mentally, substance-ly ;).

🍻I have never had a "dream job" (Sun and Neptune square MC). All I know is I will be rich. I know it in my heart. I fucking better be.

🍻Actually ^ not true I wanted to be an Astronaut when I was like 5. URANUS IN THE 1ST... I am one with the aliens. This works for Aquarius rising, Uranus/Aquarius Dominant.

🍻Capricorn Rising/Saturn in the 5th house here and for all of you that claim prominent Capricorn placements are boring... let me tell you something... we are busy getting rich so fuck you

🍻I think prominent Earth placements (esp Cap), it's not the materialism that comes with being rich that we want... its the security. Like if life goes wrong in anyway, at least we have the resources to somehow make it better. It's a security blanket. I'd rather be crying in a mansion than crying in a shack. ALSO, most of us know what it's like to grow up poor or below the middle class line.

🍻So my placements - Lilith in the 1st house especially. I'm always reading posts about being sexually wanted or some version of that. Let me tell you I wear sweatpants and sweatshirts most of the time. That profile pic over there? Yeah I don't look like that most days. I feel like since this placement gets sexualized a lot and gets exposed sexually at a young age ... it results in this. Male attention? I used to need that, now I hate men (at least most of them). Scorpio MC and Lilith in Capricorn too.

🍻Scorpio MC - yes I want to be feared. I want to hold power over people that makes them think twice about fucking with me. But not feared in a way that they think I'm mean or rude... feared as in powerful, like a boss type of way. In reality, I run from confrontation and am too scared to stick up for myself but WE ARE WORKING ON IT. Check back in 10 years. I feel like Sun/Lilith in the 10th house, prominent Capricorn placements, prominent Scorpio placements, Aries placements, and Leo placements feel this too.

🍻I have Mars in the 7th house and in terms of romantic relationships, yes I am the problem.

🍻Aries in the 3rd house and the only person I've physcially fought is my sister. I beat the hoe.

🍻MY SISTER ... OK, HOLD ON NOW. SIT DOWN FOR THIS ONE. Let me know WHY this girl is a Taurus Sun, Taurus Moon, Aries Mercury, Taurus Venus, Virgo Mars... (I think her rising is Virgo but not confirmed) ... she goes into work one day, 2 hours late cause she overslept and when her boss confronted her she said "I don't believe in the concept of time" WTF. This is the only thing that makes me doubt astrology. Just kidding, I guess its all the Taurus but ??? Still I'm confused.

🍻Since she was Earth dominant ^, she never had to study for tests in school. She had an almost perfect average and never studied. Meanwhile my ADHD ass (Moon square Jupiter, Sun/Mars (3rd house ruler) opposition Neptune, Neptune in the 1st, Sun opposition Uranus) struggled with a 2.8 in high school.

🍻My mom is a Taurus Sun Libra Moon and my dad is a Scorpio Sun Sagittarius Moon. They aren't together anymore, but when I tell you they're children in old people bodies... me and my parents are more like friends if anything. I was never grounded, never in trouble for what other people my age were in trouble for, and my friends liked them more than me I swear.

🍻Having a lot of Leo in the chart mixed with a healthy scoop of Cancer may make someone kind of dramatic... but it's how I really feel guys ok? Yes, the fact that I have to wake up tomorrow at 8am is sending me rn. Off a ledge. Into a river. Never to return. I would rather eat dirt.

🍻12th house profection year and I never want to go to bed. I never want the day to end. Sleep is a bummer right now. Even when I do sleep I wake up like 100 times. Mostly cause my cat needs pets and who am I to deny him?

🍻ANYONE WITH AN EARTH MOON, ESPECIALLY VIRGO LIKE ME OR 6TH HOUSE. Get a pet. Get one. They rely on you and need you and love you to death. Someone/something NEEDING an Earth/Virgo Moon?! A dream. I love to be needed. I have a dog (1 year) and two kitties (7 months)... they are my literal children that I birthed.

🍻My boyfriend is a Cancer Sun, Aquarius Moon, Leo Mercury & Venus, and Libra Mars... I would pay money to see the female version of him. He's such a brat. BUT he is so fun to be around and is my best friend. His moon is in my 1st house, Sun in my 7th, Venus in my 8th and Mars in my 9th.

🍻Speaking of Aquarius Moon... I've met people with this moon sign and all of them have a detached sense of family in some way or another. Whether they don't have a close relationship with them or they're super independent. My boyfriend was adopted!

That's all for tonight folks xoxo

If I offended you in anyway, no I didn't.

[starsnsparkl3s]

broken promises

cw: heavy mentions of death and suicidal thoughts, angst, based on this scene from greys anatomy with no context

"when are you going to stop suggesting that im suicidal?"

the question sounds also bizarre coming out of your lips. you and al haitham have been going back and forth about your results from the impromptu search nahida and the esteemed traveler did, along with paimon. you were a suspect in a dream that needed to be destroyed immediately, however, what they saw was worse than the dream that was the main goal.

dark images flickered around them, unlike all the previous dreams, full of emotions and color. hallucinations of various shades of red surrounded them, it felt as if they were being suffocated from being in your head to begin with. of course, for your own health, they told your husband, al haitham, about the pictures they saw. he tried talking to you about it, which resulted in the conflict in front of you now.

he took your weapon away from you, the weapon you used to protect sumeru, not caring if you put your life on the line. it was your job after all, but not even cyno was that careless.

"when you start acting like someone who wants to be alive."

your eyebrow raised, scoffing. as much as you loved al haitham, he really was insufferable sometimes and moments like this are were you wished he wasn't so stubborn. however, you were stubborn as well.

"give me my weapon back."

"why?”

" because im not suicidal and if you believe that, you’re wrong. "

now it was his turn to scoff. he put his hand on his hip and stared at you. the person he fell in love with, void of sentiment and passion. you still looked as lovely as the first time he met you but now you looked just as dead as carcasses he'll see in the desert. a few seconds pass before he responds.

"what happened last year when you fell in the water?”

your blood ran cold as the words left his mouth. last year you were trying to save a group of kids that were playing in one of the construction sites, which wasn't sturdy whatsoever. as you saved all the kids, one by one, the wood holding up the base of the building fell into the water. one of the kids started crying, saying how they needed to go in the water to get their photograph.

it was a photograph of them and their parents, who apparently passed. and you went in there. without a second thought. the water pricked your skin because of how cold it was, but you still went in and got that photograph. after you got out, soaked with the picture still in tack, the kids thanked you profusely and left. you passed out soon after, the hypothermia and the water pressure almost taking you out. al haitham wasn't pleased but nothing he could say could ever change your mind.

"i almost drowned! you think i did that for kicks?”

"you went in a body of water that was CLEARLY too cold and too deep for you to handle.”

"i was trying to save his picture!”

your head pounded with nothing. you were frustrated of course, but your body didn't feel anything. you couldn't tell that your headache was a migraine, it just felt, heavy.

"why is it, that every person there, even cyno, had the sense to leave and run from the danger besides you?”

you went to quip back but he continued.

"you know, people run away from this line between life and death. you just seem to stand on it as if it's a tightrope in the middle of the hurricane, waiting for it to push you one way or the other.”

you crossed your arms. you'd hate to admit it, but he was right. you didn't see an actual purpose into living besides protecting sumeru. you never had an urge to run for safety

"you're careless with your life. you're not trying to kill yourself, but you're careless."

your eyes filled with tears with his words. your head felt heavy and dizzy, your vision going in and out like a bad '50s movie. your body shook in some emotion you couldn't even tell at this point. you knew he wanted to help and he was worried, al haitham has always been like this. pushy and unforgiving with hid care.

“i am NOT carele-!”

“not even cyno would pull the shit you do. not even the TRAVELER THEMSELVES, would pull the shit you do. all three of you do implausible nonsense warranting such-”

“I DO IT FOR THE PEOPLE OF SUMERU,” your voice softening from the sudden uproar as the next few words leave your mouth, “…and you know that al haitham.”

his heart feels like it got chipped with one of liyue’s finest pickaxes. strong enough to break the outside but careful enough to preserve the inside. his voice wavers, but his next words make the tears from your eyes fall harder.

“no, you do it for yourself. you do it just for the chance of losing your life. just for the off chance, that you get caught in the storm and you die with a purpose.”

an: im back!!!!!!! ignore how bad this is i finished it at 5am so i had something for you guys…. apologies!

[frazzledsoul]

The thing about S6 Jess Mariano is that there is simultaneously too much of him and not enough.

I've been watching old episodes recently because of a story I've been writing on and off for a week, and I don't think people truly appreciate the amount of set-up that went into Jess's scenes in The Real Paul Anka. In this show, there are supporting cast members who almost never get scenes of their own outside of interacting with the girls and various townies. I think Paris has exactly one scene that doesn't involve Lorelai or Rory. Dean has a handful. Sookie has just one off the top of my head. I believe Logan has one as well. All of these people were on the show far, far longer than Jess was. It seems only Luke, Lane, and Jess have a lot of scenes with characters other than Lorelai and Rory...and in season 6, Jess has not been seen for two years and has not been a main cast member for three. We get an introduction to his place of work, he has interactions ALONE (!) with his friends/coworkers, we get an extended sequence where he explains to Luke how exactly his job works and where he lives, he has significant interactions with both Luke, April, and Rory, and closes out the last we see of his relationship with Luke in the OS on a good note. None of the other love interests get this, because while we spend more time with them, they are not developed as individuals outside of Rory. Dean is the good boyfriend who unexpectedly leads Rory into an affair and who we last see chafing at her desire to leave him behind, while Logan is the rich, dangerous boyfriend who entices Rory into the elitist world that Lorelai sought to escape from and who will eventually lead her astray because he is unable to escape from his father's expectations, forcing Rory to repeat the life patterns of her mother (God, I hate the AYITL ending. It blows). Jess is his own person, whose existence is not completely defined by Rory, but who eventually inspires her to seek out the path that she wants by virtue of his own example. And at the end of the story, he is the one door left open, the one person who is working with her on her goals and is still involved with her life.

(This is why I chafe when people say Jess wasn't endgame, even after all of these years. One of the last things ASP said about a follow-up is that she was going to chase Milo and Alexis down and make them do it. Her intentions were pretty obvious, even for those of us like me who don't necessarily hate Logan).

What's so great about S6 Jess is that almost all of the stuff that made him a terrible boyfriend and such a damaged, tortured character during his original run on the show has been smoothed over. He meets Rory on her terms and makes plans at her convenience: he acknowledges her discomfort: he is far more concerned with her than busting the chops of her boyfriend (although that part is clearly fun, too). He's considerate, social, a person who makes plans and follows up on them. He's confident yet self-effacing: when Rory is found to be using him, he reminds her of the boundary she's crossed yet doesn't lash out. It doesn't change his feelings overall: she isn't choosing him at the time being, but he still cares about her. Even though we leave him with a broken heart, we know he's got a life beyond her, something he didn't have when we last saw him in season 3 and season 4. He has friends, a purpose, a respected place in his community: he will be okay. It's a better place than we leave Dean and likely a better place than we leave Logan in AYITL. He will be okay.

I'm of the mind that Jess's participation in the last season of the OS has less to do with the writing team changing (although I don't think Milo was particularly keen on working with the new guys, either) and more to do with what else Milo was working on at the time. Heroes was a huge, huge deal when it first came out and networks aren't always amenable to lending out their actors to work for their competitors. I just don't think it was possible for Jess to show up no matter who was writing that season. I do occasionally wonder what the S7 writers would have done with him. It doesn't escape my scrutiny that the show skips the actual Christmas holiday because Rory was in London, because Jess almost certainly would have traveled to Stars Hollow to visit his mom and newborn sister and comfort his depressed uncle. There certainly were a lot of uses for him that had nothing to do with Rory.

AYITL Jess is of course more or less the same, only with bigger arm muscles and some of the edges smoothed out: the main difference is that we see he's been more or less accepted into the Gilmore/Danes clan and is a more active support system for Luke and his mother.

At this late stage in the game, I'm not expecting or wanting a follow-up and I think odds are very much against there ever being one. I do wish that knowing that AYITL was all there was that they had given us more time with Jess (if possible) and that there was some sort of definitive end for him and Rory instead of the door just being swung wide open and an indication of a future (and of course, Jess being a total dreamboat). However, as with all things ASP, you take what you can get and what was given to us here wasn't that bad.

Those last four words still suck, though.

[jimmycarterghostland]

I finished reading Shell 4.11 of Worm. I have no criticisms for this chapter, just praise. This novel is amazing.

Taylor, do not snitch on the Undersiders. These guys have been through so much with her. And they took care of her throughout this chapter. If I were her, I wouldn't have it in me to betray these kids. I would love them too much. Especially since the Undersiders are the only friends Taylor has. I think Tattletale is technically her best friend.

The Undersiders are villains, sure, but they're not those absolutely diabolical villains. They're not mass murderers or anything. If I had the opportunity to get the Undersiders arrested, and decided not to, I would choose not to and I wouldn't feel guilty about it.

Also, the bugs constantly going to Taylor while she was unconscious and hurt was like some children protecting their ill mother or something. At the same time, I know these bugs don't give a crap about Taylor, and they're being forced to do what she wants. I don't even think bugs can feel affection or love.

Anyway, Worm is addicting. I feel like a fool for being bored a few chapters ago, and I couldn't take Bakuda seriously as a villain. I don't feel that way anymore. I'm having fun reading Worm, and Bakuda is one dangerous villain.

This chapter was written so well. Wildbow did a good job at writing from the point of view of someone who isn't all the way there, drugged up. I like how Taylor couldn't recognize people's voices at first. It was funny when she realized Brian and Tattletale were talking to her dad. She was like:

Taylor said something along the lines of that realization woke her up instantly. Lmao.

This was a very wholesome chapter. I know the situation is screwed up. After all, this chapter was about a teenage girl pretending to be a villain while hanging out with real villains, who gets wounded by an even worse villain, and then the real villains she's been hanging out with are the only ones helping her, and then they take her to her dad, who gets lied to. All that is happening while the even worse villain blows up various parts of the city.

Thrilling stuff.

Where tf was Bitch during all of that mess? She is the worst teammate ever. Taylor, Brian, Tattletale, and Regent were fighting for their lives, with Brian and Tattletale eventually helping Taylor. And Bitch was nowhere to be found. She isn't wowing me at all. I have zero reason to like her right now.

Also, in one of these recent chapters, I can't remember which, Taylor referred to Brian as her friend and her ally(or was it teammate?). Anyway, that stuck out to me. It feels like Taylor sees herself as an official part of their group, but it's subtle. And I'm not sure if she still plans on ratting the Undersiders out. I hope she doesn't. If she does, what will she even do afterward? Taylor has no friends. If she gets the Undersiders arrested, the only person she will have will be her dad. And the girl is in desperate need of a support system, especially since she gets remorselessly bullied at school. Without a support system in your life, it would be easy to do something awful to yourself. Taylor needs the Undersiders.

Unlike all of the other books I've read that feature teams, Worm actually has a team that feels like one. I love the Undersiders as a group. They feel so real, both individually and as a team.

Not every person gets along with a person who are on the same team as they are. Some books with teams tend to create conflict between teammates that feels forced, for the sake of drama. With Worm, though, I don't get that feeling. Conflict between the Undersiders, mainly between Taylor and Bitch, happens because Bitch is the way that she is. She doesn't have an out of character moment that creates cheap, unrealistic conflict between her and Taylor.

My former favorite book series, Lorien Legacies, was awful. And it had characters being OOC for the sake of drama. In The Rise of Nine, Nine is revealed to hate bullies. Then he remorselessly bullies Five in the next book, for no reason. And Nine's bullying of Five gets a beloved character killed. It was ridiculous. There were other awful OOC moments in the series as well.

There is so much bad literature out there, but the good thing is that Worm is a piece of great fiction that makes up for the fact that bad books exist.

Worm's characters are consistent, and their consistency makes them feel real. There's no jarring out of character moments. Wildbow knows what he's doing.

Moving on.

This chapter was amazing. My love for Worm has grown stronger. I'm even more engrossed in this novel. I tend to see badly written novels that are definitely overrated, but Worm actually deserves the high rating that it has. I'm glad it exists. This is what good writing looks like.

Honestly, I don't even know what my favorite novel is anymore. But it might end up being Worm by the time I finish it.

I'm not going to add any more. I don't want this post to get too long. I have two more chapters to read today(I read 3 chapters per day of Worm daily), and I'm really loving this thing.

[polluxhale]

“Maybe it’s for the best? Never understood why she’d be so attached to that ugly mug anyways.” Pollux smirked over at his friend, clearly joking. Given their somewhat steamy history, it was fairly obvious that Pollux had never found the other man ugly. 

Xylaes rolled his eyes and took a drag from cigarette. “Maybe. She deserves bet–” Before he was able to finish that statement, Pollux had smacked the cigarette right out of his hand, “The fuck, Hale?”

“Don’t say that. You are a good person who has made some dumb mistakes that anyone probably would have made in your position. But for those that know the truth, and that truly know you, know you did the right thing. And those in charged fucked you for it because they didn’t want their own bullshit to get out in the open and cause a scandal. Light fucking forbid.” Clearly this was a topic Pollux was very passionate about. Xylaes had been his friend and his brother in arms for much of their younger lives, and at one point prior to the explosion that nearly took Pollux’s life, the two were almost inseparable. 

Xylaes leaned over to pick up his cigarette and relented that train of thought with a hand raised in surrender. “It’s been messy for a long time, neither of us have treated the other particularly well at times. Maybe now that she’s no longer in the position she was in, maybe it could be different. But I just…I can’t be there for her during this transition. Wouldn’t be good for either of us given the current circumstances.”

Pollux gave his friend a warm smile, nodding in understanding. While the two didn’t spend as much time together as they used to, they had become confidantes once more. “Maybe after your own transition hmm? As great as I’m sure you are at screwing strangers for the Red Moon, there’s plenty of opportunities to be using your other skill sets. Not just when there’s a war going on.”

“You know I’ve lost a good chunk of those skill sets…” Referring specifically to the arcane abilities he used to possess prior to having them ripped away from him as a part of his prison sentence.

Pollux reached out to give the other man’s left arm a hard pinch. Xylaes slightly recoiled at the action, but the duo watched as the invisible runes on that replanted arm shimmer to life. “But you have also gained some new ones, and some you’ve likely not even figured out yet.”

It was in Maldraxxus that Xylaes had found himself a subject of The House of Construct’s disturbing experiments. His included having his entire arm removed and replanted with that of someone who apparently had been a caster of some variety. Much was still left to mystery, but during the past campaign, he was able to produce various sorts of magic when he found himself in danger. There was a lot of promise there and still much to be explored, if he could ever get over the fact that this arm, even though he controlled it, was technically not his own.

“So anyways, that guy I was talking to you about, that possibly has a job...” Pollux continued, looking a touch trepidatious. “He is looking for people that have fallen off the grid and know how to stay off of it pretty damn well. I mentioned that you are excellent at finding those types of people, and that wasn’t just because of your magic. That’s the job, finding people, and he’ll pay extremely well under the table. You can keep up with the Moon, but this is, well, this is right up your alley, Xy. That’s all the details I can give you though, the rest is up to the two of you to iron out and discuss should he choose to hire you and should you choose to work this gig.”

Xylaes pressed his lips into a thin line, leaning back in his chair as he silently considered. “You trust him?”

Pollux squinted at that. Tough question. “...I…trust him not to fuck me over, which I feel would also extend to you given he knows you’re my friend and that I trust you.”

Being paid under the table meant that this was likely not very legal, or needed to be hush hush. Being paid under the table in order to find people also typically meant that these people would never be seen again once found. That had been a part of his gig in the military, but the targets were never your everyday Joe Schmo’s, they were people that proved to be a threat to the greater good and thus needed to be eliminated. At least that’s what they were told. Maybe that was the case here as well.

There was only one way to find out. It’s not as if there were oodles of opportunities out there for ex-cons like him, he had to take what he could get and working as an escort at a brothel just wasn’t cutting it anymore. “Yeah, I’ll talk to him. No harm in just seeing what it’s all about, right?”

Pollux tapped out a quick message on his comm and soon after came a knock on the door. He jumped out of the chair to answer it, cracking the door open and exchanging a few hushed words before allowing the third man inside. 

“Xylaes, I want you to finally meet my twin brother, Ouro.”

@xylaes @fio-renze @ouroandar

[waywardstoryenthusiast]

Defenders of Peace

'When surrounded by war, one must eventually choose a side.' Excellent point.

Oh, we have a planet name! Meridon. Don't know if they mentioned it last episode and I missed it, but could to know. Meridon, home of the Lurmen.

And, our nice moment between Bly and the villager is interrupted by droids and the rest of the plot.

(Also, very minor pet peeve, why is it Anakin who responds when Bly enters and says 'General,' and not Aayla? I get they're both generals, but it feels like it makes more sense that he's speaking to Aayla. I don't think Anakin outranks her? But, it's a minor pet peeve, and he is a main character.)

Kudos to Anakin for not fighting the Lurmen leader on staying neutral.

Ti Wad Ka is the chief's name. Glad to know, so I can stop referring to him as just chief. (He may have mentioned his name in the last episode. I don't think he did, but it's possible. I like knowing names.)

They do a good job of making you dislike the Separatists. Really hating General Lock do (? I may need to look up some of these names for the spelling.) That line, 'I would like to inspect my new colony.' Really gets under my skin.

'Because, we are such an obvious threat to you.' Well, I don't agree with his choices, but glad to see he still has his snark. Definitely agree more with Wadto.

I get the feeling that Aayla with her more measured approach is going to be the one to stop it.

Called it. Although I suppose it was a group effort, Ahsoka, Rex and Bly chasing it, and her coming out in front. But nice tactic, instead of chasing it, ending up where it will be. I like it.

Okay, I realize that droids can have personalities, but I doubt this general cares about that, so it seems he's just talking to hear himself talk. (Obviously it's so we can get exposition, but it seems in character with what we've seen of this general so far.)

(I do like the old gag of someone asking for volunteers, and everyone but one or two people stepping back. It's a classic.)

I finally got to see Aayla saving Bly outside of gifs! Yay.

'I specifically chose this planet because it is inhabited. The villagers will make excellent test subjects.' Again, doing an excellent job of making these guys hateable.

'There's a difference between pulling innocents into a war, and leaving them to be exterminated.' Dammit Anakin, I might be in danger of liking you.

Damn, seeing the jedi at work when things aren't going wrong is actually pretty cool. Understated, but they all seem competant and good at their jobs. (Something I am a sucker for, after watching Leverage at an impressionable age.) That said, seeing Anakin mess with the droids with a rock leaves me with a suspicion of what inspired Rex's 'Roger, Roger' stunt in the Domino squad episode.

'They did not attack us before.' … Um, what does Tee Watt Kaa (I caved and looked up the names. Also, wtf, George Takei did the voice of Lok Durd, the Separatist general?!?) consider an attack? They ransacked the village and were firing blasters. Just because no one was hurt, that still seems like an attack. That said, I do understand the chief not wanting to compromise their way of life. One thing I have seen in various media is the question of how far can or should one go in fighting a war. If you compromise your beliefs to fight, is that the right choice, even if it's to save lives? And what is too big a compromise? At what point do you look back and realize that even if you are 'winning' battles or even the war, you have also lost yourself? There's one quote, from the crime tv show Numb3rs that really stuck with me: "When you're fighting for a way of life, you use whatever tools you have at your disposal." "And before you know it, you've given up your way of life!"

But, just as I don't think it's right to use war as an excuse to do take extreme measures without trying other ways, I don't think refusing to compromise one's ideals for any reason, even when there are lives at stake, is good either. I don't know if I'm making sense, but there it is.

'That wasn't so hard.' AHSOKA DO NOT JYNX IT!

Way to go Wag Too! Love that little dude. And hey, they're using a similar tactic that he did in the previous episode to take out the critter.

[silver-violet]

Gonna copy and paste some of my lore that has glacius and Sam's first meeting. I recently retyped it and while it's not heavily focused on g/t it is a main subject so enjoy! (also sorry about some of the random references, like I said it's basically just a. Cutout from my lore doc so-)

Story below the cut!

Glacius spent the next few years taking odd jobs and committing petty theft, during which his guardianship was appointed to him (I. don't think I've told you this before but. the way someone becomes a guardian is by the previous one passing, and then inheriting it. No it isn't random and that isn't important until Atreus' part of the story) Due to this, he soon became a mercenary and gained infamy. Eventually, he was scouted by the white knights, joining their ranks. Over the years alone, he had grown cold and distant, harboring resentment for his brother. This attitude helped him advance in the company over the years, leading him to finally live a (relatively) normal and comfortable life. At age 27, some of his more recent jobs began sticking out to him. His targets shifted from arguable evil people, to some who didn't seem deserving of their fate. While this bothered him, he trusted in the company's morals, and continued through. During one of these missions, he was tasked with collecting an artifact that had been raided from the company, and stealing it back from the unground auction it was being held at.

The mission began smoothly, with him managing to slip into the building unnoticed, and sneaking through the unmonitored halls. His target was simply an unmarked door, locking it behind him as he slipped inside. the only light in the room came from under the door, and a dying bulb in a distant corner. It was enough to look over everything though, and he sighed upon seeing the various rows of items. Some were special enough to be set in their sections, while others were simply tossed in piles. Despite the grueling task of searching, Glacius continued on, the minutes ticking by.

Long after the search had started, The artifact still wasn't found. However, one of the items did catch his eye. standing alone from the piles of jewelry and precious relics, was a small birdcage, covered with a tarp. he paused, debating whether it was worth wasting his time on. Curiosity got the better of him, however, as he approached the strange object and pulled aside the covering. Inside was a small creature, frozen in fear as it looked up at him. It took him a few seconds to process how...Human it looked. Its upper half was almost entirely human, minus its thin tail and folded ears. Not to mention the large wings sprouting from its back, and the rodent-like bottom half. After a few seconds of silence between the two, glacius shifted back slightly, crouching to study it better. The creature flinched as he did so, but had nowhere to hide within the barren cage. He felt pity for the creature, however decided to just cover it again. As he was moving to do so, his ears picked up the faintest sound.

"ᵖ⁻ᵖˡᵉᵃˢᵉ. . ." they whispered, their form trembling. Glacius was unsure how to respond, surprised they could speak, let alone in any language he could understand. He thought of what to say for a moment, feeling sympathy for the small thing.

"Hey-" he began, pausing as they flinched from the sound. he lowered his voice to a whisper, crouching lower so as to not loom over them. "hey...it's fine, I'm not one of the ones who put you here." The creature didn't react, and he was beginning to think he had just imagined it as it mumbled again.

". . .ʸ⁻ʸᵒᵘ'ʳᵉ ⁿᵒᵗˀ," they said, a glint of hope in their voice. they were still trembling, but seemed less likely to dart away now. ". . .ᵂ⁻ᵂʰʸ ᵃʳᵉ ʸᵒᵘ ʰᵉʳᵉ ᵗʰᵉⁿˀ"

He mulled it over for a second, thinking of how to phrase it without seeming like he was dangerous to them. "They took something, and I was hired to take it back." The creature seemed conflicted with this, but chose to believe him as they took the smallest step forward.

". . .ᶜᵃⁿ. . .ᶜᵃⁿ ʸᵒᵘ ᵗ⁻ᵗᵃᵏᵉ ᵐᵉ ᵗᵒᵒˀ" They didn't quite trust him, but any fate seemed better than where they were now. He wasn't quite sure how to respond, looking away in thought.

"I. . .don't see why not. But you have to be silent," he said, waiting for their response.

They nodded, their shaking beginning to subside. Glacius opened the doors of the cage, holding his hand out as the small figure jumped onto it. Carefully, he held his hand to his shoulder, allowing them to jump on as they clung to his collar. In this position, he was able to hear them better, their whispery voice becoming louder. After closing the door of the cage, he covered it once more, hoping that would delay their discovery. Before he went back to his search, glacius paused, an idea coming to his mind.

". . .Have you seen something that looks like a box made of gears?"

"Was it u-uh. . .Brown?"

"Exactly." Glacius looked down to see them pointing near a pile he had searched through before, nevertheless he went through it again. After even more time rummaging through it, he finally found what he was looking for, carefully stashing it away in his bag. "Thanks. . .uh. . ." he blanked on their name, realizing they had yet to introduce themselves.

"S-Sam. . ."

"Glacius." Before the smaller man could try to continue the conversation, glacius made his way to the door, cracking it slightly as he peered through. Once he was sure it was safe, he made his way back into the hallway, the door clicking closed quietly behind him. Despite the extra passenger, he was able to follow his route back out, soon on the edge of the property. From there, he was able to take his time through the wilderness, though still on edge for anything nearby.

Any questions Sam asked were either met with silence or merely a sound; And any conversation starters were the same, met with single-word replies. It didn't matter, however, as after a quick trek, glacius was able to spot his car and climb inside. He stopped as he went to grab his seatbelt, realizing it would most likely hit the man on his shoulder. He held his hand out to them once more, and they climbed on as he lowered it to his passenger seat. Sam glanced to the side as he was doing so, catching glimpses of various weapons in the back of the man's car. He questioned whether he had made the right choice, but realized it was too late as the car began to move.

The two began to bond as they stuck around each other. Sam had no idea where he had come from and had nothing to go back to. And despite glacius never admitting so, he enjoyed the company the small man provided him, and so they stuck together, unbeknownst to the company.

[fierceawakening]

@notthateither (I think that's your username) I keep meaning to come back to your post on what we agree with and what we don't, and I keep getting distracted by various shiny things. So I'll just say:

Starting off, if you're cool with people transitioning even though you don't understand it and maybe even find it weird or, hell, maybe even a bit scary, then I'm cooler with you than I am with a lot of people. I believe creating the least oppressive world possible involves giving people freedom to make decisions for what we think are bad reasons, so If you're doing that, we're broadly aligned in political terms even if I don't like some of what you believe. (An example for me here? I'm deeply troubled by "I wouldn't have an abortion if my fetus were "normal," but I would if there was evidence of disability." I think that's very, very often going to be influenced by growing up in an ableist society and is rarely going to be about realistic expectations. But a world in which women are forced to carry to term is a more oppressive one than one where they are not, so I cannot stop someone even if I'm 100% certain that is her only reason.)

But as for where our beliefs differ and why, I'd say the core of it is that radical feminism often asserts things about men and/or males (not defining these here although to me they are different; it's not relevant to the point I'm making) are particularly dangerous, threatening, or destructive. I worry that singling out a group of humans and calling them the source of destructiveness is wrongheaded, and in fact the first step on a very long yellow brick road to fascist thinking.

It's not just that I think trans women aren't men, that there's a relevant difference between sex characteristics and social role (though I do indeed think that.)

It's that even if I DID literally see trans women as "males who wish to be women," and this switch as something that people can only sort of do and never manage completely, I still don't see how that's something inherently wrong to want, or that there's something suspicious about people wanting it. It's maybe a little weirder than "I was a stamp collector, but now I want to be a skydiver," but it's that sort of thing. There's nothing inherently untoward about it.

Body modification should be undergone after a great deal of thought. But most humans fly by the seat of their pants a lot, much more than I generally do or generally understand. I used to think it was my job to warn them against this, but... now I don't. People who live high risk, high reward lives are allowed to do so. All that's necessary is that they acknowledge and own the risks they take, and not blame it on other people if those risks are presented to them truthfully and without spin.

(And hell, I'm one of the most cautious, risk averse humans I have ever met, and MY medical-reasons, justified-to-most modifications went wildly wrong. Sometimes stuff really is just life being fucked up and not making sense.)

Why do we have gender? I don't know. I suspect it's a mix of nature and nurture, social factors and vague, difficult to pin down biological ones too. I don't know that I'll ever know for sure.

What I do know is that the oppressive stuff I've seen seems to happen, and really mess people up, when they're demanded to fit into one box and not another. I'm not sure what abolishing gender would mean or would look like, or how we'd make sure we do it justly, but I do know that letting people be is something I can do right here and now, and something I can encourage others to do, and a thing that seems, from the evidence we have, to help most of the time.

Which is why I'm not... well, I'd say why I'm not "gender critical" but it feels very weird to think of myself as not critical of gender when what I mean is the much weaker not sure we should abolish it. So instead of saying why I'm not GC I'll phrase it as "why I'm not a radical feminist."

Fair?

[laurfilijames]

So I have always been curious about something, but I didn't want to overstep, so if this is personal or you don't want to share, please delete this Ask. XD

You mention that you're an equestrian and a horsegirl--can you please tell us more about that? About your horse(s), your experience riding, all or any of that stuff. :) I love horses but have never lived anywhere you can access them easily, so lucky people with horses fascinate me!

Me getting this ask.

Ohhhhh you're so nice for asking!! I am indeed an equestrian and proud Horse Girl and am more than happy to talk about my passion and number one hobby!

I've always loved horses, and first rode one when I was 2. My aunt (who is like my mother, who also never had kids ((we say every time we're together that were each other's favourite family member ☺️)) has always had horses and introduced me to the lovely beasts. Her first horse that she owned was the first one I rode; her name was Chardonnay (yes I know...) and we sadly lost her two years ago at the age of 25. We still have her two babies, a 20 yo gelding named Hooligan (again, I know...) and a 18 year old mare Izzy (aka The Red Devil) and yes they live up to their names.

I've ridden at various stables throughout my childhood and teenage years, with some breaks in between being a boy-crazy teen and working/school, but have always consistently ridden my Aunts horses.

I've never competed, had zero desire and it would've taken the joy out of it for me, as showing is a whole different ball game. I ride purely for the love of it and bonding with my horse.

I ride "English" and do hunter/jumper (jumping over fences through courses) but really just love going out and spending time with them by grooming them and maybe going for a hack through the fields after doing some walk/trot/canter exercises.

I was part-boarding two different horses over the last few years but sadly my coach sold one and then the other became severely lame so I actually haven't ridden since December 😭. I think I needed the break, and now that spring is here I will get back in the saddle and working my aunts horses as they've fattened up heaps over the winter.

It's a dangerous sport, and sometimes I get in my own head over it and am becoming less "risky" with riding in general (ie not terribly fussed if I jump or not). Now that I'm in my thirties, falling off hurts a f*ck of a lot more and takes longer to heal/recover and I have a job and a house and a cottage to pay for.

I don't know if I'll ever own a horse myself, they're bloody expensive, finicky beasts who have insane, head-scratching illnesses and injuries, but I know I will always have them be a part of my life.

Horses are truly magical creatures. They're like dogs, but bigger, and usually forget their size. They know when you have a bad day, are sad or happy, and have the amazing ability to feel every emotion you do. When you're on one, you can literally think what you're going to do next and lo and behold, they're doing it. They feed off of our emotions and even though they are prey animals and are completely reliant on us for their love and care, they give so much.

I really hope you have the opportunity to be around them one day, because it will change you forever.

Thank you SO MUCH for this ask and please please please feel free to chat with me about them any and all the time!! 💗💗💗

Here's some photos because obviously...

Hooligan

Izzy

Hooligan and Izzy

Chardonnay

(Let it be known that I say "MUSTER THE ROHIRRIM" whenever I bring them in from the field because how can you not?)

[greenmansgrove]

Rowan: My Guide to/through Druidry

I've mentioned I only started studying druidry a little over a year ago. I knew for many years before that point how desperate I was for ritual and/or to "believe in" something again after estranging myself from Catholocism in my late teens, when even my parents drifted away from practicing Christianity. During grad school, I had friends who practiced various folk religions as well as Wicca, but even then, I struggled to find a connection to those practices, other than the joy of standing in my at-the-time metamour's overgrown backyard for a ritual of thanks at the polycule's Samhain party. That was my first time celebrating any of the high days, despite a childhood curiosity in pagan spirituality. I'd made soul cakes to share, too. But as time passed, relationships ended, and grad school became busier, my spiritual care fell by the wayside.

Then, roughly five years later, having recovered from homelessness thanks to a careless landlord, graduated grad school, survived a year as an adjunct (a job I promptly lost during the pandemic), moved to an entirely new state, all while nursing a broken heart and beginning my medical transition... I felt the need again. I had hopes that it, too, might help me through both the heartbreak and my declining mental health.

All the events of the past several years had left me feeling alone and vulnerable. I felt like I had no sense of self and no life of my own. I was also anticipating some painful future events, and I really didn't know how to emotionally prepare myself. On a whim, I asked someone to do an ogham reading. My question(s) were wild and unfocused, representative of my conflicted and pained emotional state, and I'm thankful for the reader's patience. I've always found humor in things like tarot and horoscopes, considering them nothing more than just for-fun or aids in guiding intuition. The results of this reading were as generic as any other, offering the same wisdom I'd heard elsewhere. But the final ogham the reader drew was none other than Luis, or rowan/mountain ash, which is the second few in the ogham alphabet (after birch) with two lines pointed towards the right. And so, when the reader drew this ogham, as if in perfect answer to the deepest fears I was anticipating, came the message, "You are protected."

It is difficult for me to describe what I felt when I received this message. I felt relief, though a cautious relief, at best, given that I take these readings with a grain of salt, but it was enough to bring me to tears. I have largely felt "unprotected" since moving out on my own and experiencing all I had in the last handful of years. It'd been one thing after another in my life with very little rest, peace, and joy. I wanted to believe that it were true. I wanted to believe after so many years of struggling to find faith in something, to cling to hope, to feel like I belonged anywhere, that I would be okay. It most definitely felt like grasping at straws to try believe in this reading. I've always been one of those people who wanted proof and to whom divine experiences never came. But it was enough for me at the time to open myself up a bit.

Rowan is one of the most sacred woods to the druids, and it is associated with protection thanks to folklore and mythology the world over. It also has associations with the fey. I read somewhere that, because of its associations with the fey, the divine, or the other world, it protects because of its chaotic nature. It "disrupts" whatever dangers or energies that are directed towards it. Again, as an atheist, I respect these interpretations. I find the symbolism to be helpful for finding connection to the world and to my ancestors (both those of blood and of covenant--another post in the making) who had their own ties to and stories of the lands in which they lived. Rowan has thus acted as a focus for me over the past year. It was my starting point, because I needed that one little push to act and move through the coming difficulty rather than dwell on the tragedy for which I'd been bracing myself. I am incredibly thankful for that message, because, as an act of reciprocity, which is concept important not just in spiritual practices but useful in developing deeper relationships with the land and community at large, I committed myself to trying out this druidry thing, at least for a year. And now I'm beginning year two.

In another occurrence of synchronicity in my life, I began practicing druidry in a place where not only the RDNA formed, but where rowan/mountain ash grows abundantly. One of the projects I created for myself (finding passions are good at forcing you to do that), I wanted to find harvest from various trees which I could give as offerings at RDNA rituals. UMN-Saint Paul has a self-guided tree tour, which was initially helpful in being able to visit some pre-identified examples, including rowan, to aid me in learning to identify the trees out in the wild. I've since found rowan trees closer to my home, with which I'm beginning to foster a relationship. I keep some rowan wood on my altar, I carry a piece of rowan wood on my keyfob and/or some berries in a little wooden locket, I had some rowan carved and painted onto my walking cane, and I regularly offer rowan berries at my RDNA grove's rituals.

More recently, I participated in a guided meditation on the rowan tree. Meditation can be especially helpful in aiding one listen to their intuition, and my question or focus of my meditation at the time was, "Should I join the priesthood of the RDNA?" The answer I "received" was flippant, but in tune with how I would answer myself or anyone looking for wisdom: "Follow what path you will. Even if that path is paved, it is still new to you." Another oddly perfect answer, thanks to rowan. I have a lot of anxiety about "going my own way" and "taking the road less traveled by" out of fear I am ill-prepared or will hurt myself. Hell, I've gone hiking so many time and gotten lost or fallen off/into things and needed to call park rangers, all because I didn't espouse as much caution as I should have. Part of my efforts over the past year to be more physically active and to be in nature has been to find places with paved hiking paths so I can just enjoy myself and build confidence instead of trying to hold myself to some ideal that I'm not ready to be just yet. So, "receiving" this answer really put me at ease and told me that I'm doing what I need to. I can go at the pace that I need and use what tools and aids are helpful to me because comparing myself to others isn't all that helpful. It may even be ableist to assume that a druid needs to be able to rough-it and hike unafraid and unfettered through the wilderness. It's more about the journey and forging my own personal relationship with nature in the quest for spiritual awareness. Maybe I will join the higher orders, or maybe I won't and I'll give up on druidry altogether. Either way, that's my path and no one can take it from me or judge me for it.

I finally feel like I do have a life, and I'm doing my best to enjoy it. I now feel that my daily experiences out in nature are divine in and of themselves, and I've become more skilled at "reading signs" that I might use to guide my intuition or view simply as poetic coincidences that enhance my enjoyment of a brief moment in time. I'm thankful for it all.

[limeadeislife]

I remember, when I took Intro to Psych during my sophomore year of college, the professor said something once about how it's easier to have a crush on someone after riding a roller coaster together. Like, sharing an intense or scary experience can contribute to feelings of bonding and attraction

About two and a half years after that, as I think I've mentioned on my blog a couple other times, I did a fairly unique public service program called AmeriCorps NCCC. It involved being sent first to a campus in a small town in Mississippi and living communally in close quarters with a bunch of other 18-to-24 year olds who were meeting each other for the first time, then traveling to other places in the southern U.S. to work on public service projects, with the daily schedule of work and other required activities often running over 8 hours. Opportunities to leave the communal living environment were few and far between. Definitely an intense experience. On the other hand, the weather was warm, and some of the places we saw were pretty beautiful

And during the first month, I met a girl who I got the sense was fairly "popular" - because of course, when you throw a bunch of 18-to-24 year old strangers together in close quarters, a social dynamic that includes some people being popular will develop. It's kind of like freshman year at a small college where most people live on campus, I think, combined with some kind of summer camp for young adults

This girl was friendly to me in the same way that she was friendly to everyone. And while the full story is worth telling in some other context, for now I'll just say that we went from being casually friendly, to being friends, to me finding out that she had feelings for me (which was mutual), to us dating(!!)

This is the ex I've mentioned on here a handful of times. And recently, this past March 24th, was the 5th anniversary of her breaking up with me

I know it's not normal, and likely not good - some people would probably say it's creepy - to still feel sad about an ex after 5 years. That's half a decade.

Now, part of this is that she was the only person I've ever had a happy romantic relationship with that lasted for more than roughly 2 months, so in that light, I don't think it's so strange that the memories would still be significant to me.

But the other aspect of it is that Intro Psych roller coaster principle. AmeriCorps NCCC was such a different experience from normal life, the "real world". We were in this crazy unfamiliar thing together and we both felt tired or anxious pretty often, and we found each other and turned to each other for comfort, and that was definitely just. An emotionally intense experience. I don't really know how to describe it with words. You know the romance plots in fantasy novels, where the protagonists are on some dangerous life-changing adventure, and the affection between the love interests is accordingly stronger and more poignant? It felt kind of like that.

And that was honestly probably one of my favorite emotions that I've ever experienced, and it just feels kind of hard for me to accept that I'll probably never have a chance to experience it again. Even if I do find a happy romantic relationship again in my life, something that I already worry about for various reasons.

I'm 27 now. Intelletually I know that there are plenty of people in their late 20s, including other weird nerds, who are in happy, fulfilling romantic relationships. (I believe some such people follow me here, and I appreciate the hope you provide.) But it's just hard for me to imagine for myself. I don't know if that one unconventional experience gave me unrealistic expectations. But - I'm sorry to generalize - I feel like when I encounter people nowadays who are theoretically in my dating pool, they're mostly regular adults who have jobs and live in apartments, and are looking for a partner who is also a stable, responsible adult with a job and an apartment. And even if I do achieve the external markers of that - get a permanent full-time job, move into my own apartment - and one of those people agrees to go on dates with me, it's hard for me to imagine the resulting relationship feeling as meaningful.

But rationally there must be people in their late 20s who also want this vague thing that I want. Maybe it's just hard to picture something before it happens. Maybe hypothetical-future-partner and I could go on a road trip together (after I get a driver's license, cause I don't have that yet currently either) and that would trigger a similar roller-coaster-effect. Idk.

[straycatboogie]

2023/05/29 English

BGM: Phil Collins - Both Sides Of The Story

Today I worked late. This morning I enjoyed chatting a little in English on clubhouse. After that, I went to AEON and thought about an idea in my mind. It's about the "responsibility" (we Japanese sometimes use this as the "Jiko Sekinin", which means "responsibility for oneself"). As you know, this concept can work severely to one's life. We have to think about our lives as the results we have done, therefore we are the ones who have to owe the responsibilities completely to our lives... Indeed, that attitude is important. For example, I have been working at the current company. That is a choice I have been making. So I have to owe the responsibility towards to my working because I can quit it anytime if I hate it. Therefore, I have to work without any complaints... I can feel that severe pressure. I can remember that I have been taught as "Quit that job soon" or "Live separately from your parents". But I couldn't have chose them... is it because of my choices?

From my point of view, I have never quit my job because I have not had anything to do except that job. I couldn't be a unemployed one (we Japanese say that as a NEET). And I have never abandoned my parents because they were too old to live alone by themselves. And also I had no money simply. From those reasons, I have lived this life even if I could choose any "alternative" ways to live. That might be a life. In other words, we can't say that everything must be from one's choices easily. We should do what we do following/concerning what can be the best to do within the limits. And that life can be controlled by uncertain things. Chances would work as factors which control the lives. Me, I can never say that it is from my choice completely to learn English with an interest. Indeed, once I had an interest in translation in English. But I have to say that learning English literature or connecting myself with various friends internationally are forming the current life of mine. In other words, it is by random chances.

Then we have to concern about the difference between the sceneries. The one the person is watching can be different from the one from me. Not judging from my side clearly, but trying to be someone with imagining his/her stage. That tells us how important to try to overcome the "separation"... And this "separation" must be an important keyword. As I wrote yesterday, I should try to understand different religious people like Muslim. And also trying to think about the foreigners in my town. Accepting them with tolerance instead of blaming them. By the way, how enigmatic our lives are! Me, I am just a weird autistic person therefore beyond their understanding. I am just living based on my policy, but they would think that I am just a monster who speaks English. How should I face that "separation"?

I finished reading Maria Ressa's book, a journalist from the Philippines. "How to Stand Up to a Dictator". It is really an interesting book which tells us the fighting spirit she have. That has enabled her to create the way of journalism in her country Philippines. Like George Orwell's "1984", the history can be rewritten by the establishment easily. And also there are also a lot of pieces of fake news... How can I survive such a terrible situation? She blames Facebook so severely, and it makes me impressed. About me, I have enjoyed reading like this certainly. This is because I want to try to see/judge the essences without being dazed by fake. How to overcome the confusion and misunderstanding because of fake? How to overcome the "separation"? This suggests me that everything I am thinking is connected loosely. Of course, I can't understand someone else completely. But I also believe that it shouldn't be actual to abandon that someone. It can be dangerous.

[college-girl199328]

A TikToker made a big change in her life and moved from Toronto to Dubai because of many things she didn't enjoy about Canada. TikToker, Sofia Aslezova, is going viral after sharing various reasons for her move to the Middle East, and fellow Canadians agreed with her points.

Aslezova moved to Dubai in November 2022 and has learned a lot from her experience, which others seem pretty interested in after the content creator discussed Dubai's safety over Toronto's in a TikTok video. "It's much safer but has become so dangerous after COVID that we have no idea what happened."

Then the TikToker explained her love for the warm weather and her hate for the snow. For context, the winter season, more specifically January, the coldest month of the year in Dubai, has an average temperature of 20 degrees. Residents also love a bougie lifestyle. Everyone is very ambitious here. Nobody here is depressed. Everybody is really happy," Aslezova said.

"It's 80% ex-pats, so people who move here to live a better life are not just stuck here," she explained. "I feel like people in Canada are just born there and stuck there, and I don't love that vibe." TikToker told Narcity that she would never move back to Canada.

"I've been there (Canada) my whole life, and I was never truly happy living there. When COVID hit and I was out of my job as a makeup artist for 8 years, I realized that it wasn't my passion and I was hustling just to be able to afford to live in the city," she added. "It was my parents' decision to move to Canada, not mine; I agree with you that I am Canadian, and I feel stuck and want to move to Texas or El Salvador or Colombia," someone commented.

"Totally agree. Canada is no longer the same," another added too. "We're in Canada, and we feel stuck because of family… but we really don't like it here," a TikToker shared.

According to Global Media Insights, 8.92 million people were considered ex-pats in Dubai in 2022. A content creator also shared that Dubai is a great place for her to live based on her astrocartography chart.

In a follow-up video, the TikToker shared what that chart looks like and what it means to her.

Well, according to Women's Health, "astrocartography is essentially a map of how and where the planetary energies in your astrological chart have an influence on you across the world," astrologist Sanasjia Clervoix explained to them that in the 1970s, American astrologist Jim Lewis developed astrocartography charts—"the system of mapping out lines where the planets were angular for a particular time onto a terrestrial map."

In other words, it's a way to learn why specific places affect different people the way they do. I wish I had had your courage when I was your age. Go live your adventure," someone shared.

So, maybe next time you're looking for a reason to move and are feeling stuck, check out your astrocartography chart—it might give you the sign you hoped for.

[brightblessed-aa]

@fxrtunas​ said:     Roi Coello had proven himself to be a far better mage than D'kav could ever hope to be. It didn't take much convincing for the miqo'te to seek the man out and request a meeting, one that could perhaps benefit the both of them. But knowing Asterios resides with the black mage? Knowing that he is his personal healer? A surprising turn of events, one that has D'kav brows furrowing long before he even takes his first steps before Roi.     

"Your power exceeds your reputation," D'kav notes, already feeling the amount of prowess held within the mage before him. "So I must offer my services. I know that you don't have any reason to trust me considering your... infamy, but I do come with some knowledge, as a sign of good faith." When D'kav smiles, his the points of his teeth are all the more pronounced. "The astrologian you're with. Allan Kier? I thought I should warn you that he is not to be trusted."    

D'kav pauses here, if only to gauge Roi's reaction. There is no telling what this man thinks, after all, what this mage will do. There have been various rumours from the man's goals, but never anything personal. Anyone that would wish to garner such information do not seem to live to tell the tale.    

 "His real name is Asterios, and he will betray you just as he betrayed me. Of course, one as powerful as yourself would be well-prepared for it, but I thought you should know, if you're interested in working together."

⸻ ☄

It was not easy to reach him. Roi had done his fair share of illicit activities. Adventuring had proved difficult to make a living doing. Despite his own hesitation, Roi had quickly made enemies and fallen into more criminal endeavors. His search for power and the freedom that came with it had been a guiding light during those dark days. And mentions of a talented adventurer that seemed to help the common man quickly turned to words of pity. In Ul’Dah, only money got you anywhere. And thus, to be powerful he had to be wealthy. So when he did fall in with criminals, he made sure to get his cut. At some point, those rumors of a kind hearted adventurer who had fallen on hard times became whispers of fear. Of a man that had taken up the fallen art of black magic. 

From that point, Roi had carefully crafted his own image. With enough power and influence in the underground, he could live without worry of starvation. Many prominent criminals were indebted to him. Even more feared him enough to know not to speak of him. Assassins returned to them as charred remains. Lovers, children. It didn’t matter. Roi would stomp out anything that threatened to burn him. Even several voidsent had been made his. Offered sacrifices of his own aether or the aether of others. Magical traps, voidsent, criminals, even some authority figures danced in the palm of his hand. Never knowing WHERE he was, but knowing he was out there and would kill them if he wanted to. 

And yet, this man had gone through so much trouble to meet him. It was interesting, albeit, frustrating. He had a rather important job to do and he didn’t want to babysit some wannabe black mage. He simply stared at him with dull yellow eyes, aether and will already gathered up to kill the man if he tried anything. 

But then, there was that name. Allan never spoke of his past and Roi never asked. It was something mutual with people like them. It didn’t matter what sort of twisted or broken path led you to this way of life. At least, it didn’t to Roi. But still, curiosity was something dangerous. 

❝ Asterios... ❞ He tested how it felt on his lips. He rather liked the taste. Not to mention the shock it would give Allan when he said it to him. ❝ So you were working with him and he betrayed you? Surely, you want something in return for more information? Are you here to try to establish a partnership with me? ❞ He looks at the other, not letting any emotion show. 

[lys1]

Congratulations! You waited so patiently <3 This is another Asra x fem!reader for you. NSFW. 5218 words. 

Playing With Potions

—————

The late spring morning air was warming up to be a balmy 75 degrees. You had your skirt pulled down and up, tucked in the back of the waistband, forming makeshift shorts. The shop was somewhat quiet, yet the din from the streets made its nimble way through the open windows.

You descend the ladder to the box of ingredients you were unpacking. They had come in the previous evening and Asra had promptly asked you to “organize them later”. Of course you said yes, the two of you shared this shop after all, and the work that came with it.

Asra himself was bustling behind the counter, sweeping the wooden floors free of the dust and fallen ingredients. He stops momentarily to pick up his cup of tea and take a long sip. The jasmine tea's steam billows into his face as he sighs with content pleasure.

The floorboards creak as you step down and Asra looks over at you, gaze soft. "How's the supplies look, dear?" He asks curiously, returning the cup to it’s coaster.

"Ah," you muse, counting the small containers in your hands. "Looks like we will be all set on lizard toes for a while, I think our supply captain read 1000 instead of 100." You can't help but chuckle, it couldn't be helped, at least you wouldn’t have to order more for a while.

Asra's eyes open a little wider, "oh my." He laughs, "I suppose we won’t". He sets his broom to rest against the counter and bare feet pad over to you, his deep-purple eyes examining the products.

You feel his hand settle on your waist subconsciously; a side effect of being close to one another. You breathe in lightly, smelling the sweet scent of coconut and honied biscuits wash over you. Asra's breakfast choice was apparent.

"Mm," you say, turning so the two of you were face to face. "You smell delicious."

Asra smiles, box in his hand now a little less important. "Care for a taste?" He teases, eyes falling to your parted lips. He sets his lizard toes aside and joins his other hand at your waist. You look up at him through your eyelashes and nod.

He is a mere millimeter from sealing the gap between you when the bell of the shop jingles merrily.

"Ah jeez," you huff good in good nature. "I forgot we have jobs and responsibilities."

Asra laughs at your obvious disappointment and steals a small peck. "Unfortunately, we have to eat somehow." He then turns away and walks back to the counter to greet the customer.

The man is short and has a little round face. He looks extraordinarily nervous, and this catches your attention. Yours and Asra's shop is well known in the city and the townsfolk trust their magicians. You hadn't seen anyone come in here looking so nervous, and maybe even a little embarrassed.

"What can I do for you, sir?" Asra asks charmingly, resuming his position behind the counter. Briefly you let yourself admire how nice he looks, comfortable in his shop and expertise, before turning back to the box you were supposed to be dealing with. Not, however, letting your ears miss the conversation.

"I," the man starts, already fumbling with his words. "I, well look. I need help." He finishes plainly, nervously clutching his shirt between his pudgy hands.

Asra smiles kindly, "many do." He says, tilting his head and examining his new client. "Are you here for a card reading? Need to get some answers?"

The man groans as though he is already exhausted with the conversation. "No, I already know what I need. I have the answers. I've heard about this place. The ways you can help people. I live an hour out of the market and I made this trip just to see you."

"We're flattered, for sure." Asra says calmly, you can hear slight annoyance in his tone from all the ambiguity. The visitor is none the wiser though. "To help you though," Asra continues. "I'll need to know what you need."

"Alright I need a potion," the man finally reveals. "One that will help me... with performance." His cheeks are redder than a bell pepper in the sun.

Asra raises a white eyebrow, "performance? Are you an actor?"

"No!" The man's voice came out in a strangled whisper, obviously trying to keep it down. You roll your eyes, chancing a glance over your shoulder. The shop floor wasn't that big, of course you were going to hear everything.

"No," he said again, this time a little more composed. "What I mean is... my sex life performance." The truth comes out. Your visitor wipes his forehead with a dirty rag from his pocket. "My wife and I well.. we've hit a slump," he explains. "And I've heard of potions that can help with that kind of thing. Stuff that will completely change the game." His eyes are shining now, imaging life post-performance potion.

Asra looks uncertain at best. "I see," he starts, shooting you a glance. "That.. does exists. But it takes awhile to make. And the price isn't cheap either."

You shove the last of the crow feathers into their designated drawer while listening. You have never heard of such a potion, but you were also still learning. Asra sounds a little unsure though.

"Price isn't an issue," the man sounds desperate. "I'll pay anything."

Asra sighs, he feels bad for the man wringing his hands before him, practically crying for a cure. "Alright," he finally concedes. "I'll make it, but you'll have to come back in the morning. This kind of thing takes all evening to brew."

Your customer nods vigorously, "I can wait." He says. "Tomorrow morning, yes! I'll be here!" His excitement apparent, he bows a few times while backing out of the door, tripping over his own feet.

The door closes with a sharp bang and the bell rings furiously. Asra blows air out of his mouth so that itf ruffles the curls between his eyes.

"Well," he says after a moment. "A sex performance enhancing potion was not what I was expecting to make today." He rubs his temples, eyes closed and looking thoughtful.

You grin at him from the shelf as you pick up the empty shipping box and rest it on your hip. "That's quite the name, I've never heard of a potion like that."

Asra laughs and opens his beautiful eyes to look at you. "Yes, you'll have to forgive me for not teaching you that kind of magic, it's not the.. safest." He ends uncertainly. "I don't even know how this guy found out about it. It's not talked about much amongst us magicians.. and it's certainly not a common one."

Immediately more questions than your mouth can keep up with flood your brain. "So how did you find out about it? And why isn't it safe?" You ask the two more important ones, eyes following Asra as he finds a piece of paper and quill to use.

He dips his quill in the register's ink well and starts scratching down what you presumed to be ingredients. "I've been studying magic for years, my love." He says simply, "and before you ask, no I haven't used it on myself." He looks up at you, mischief dancing in his pretty eyes. "I'd like to think my sex game is up to par." He adds innocently, licking his lips seductively when your ears tinge pink.

You brush imaginary dirt off your shirt sleeves and huff. "I suppose it's pretty good." You mumble. It almost feels like a lie to just describe it as "pretty good" but Asra doesn't need you to stroke his ego right now. You do that enough falling to pieces beneath him every night.

Asra is well aware of your attempt to keep him humble and laughs lightly. "And to answer your other question," he says, turning back to his ingredient list, "messing with ones body like this can be dangerous. You have to be very precise."

You nod as he explains, it makes sense.

Potions are always brewed in pots over a magic fire so you put yourself to work, removing a medium sized iron pot from a hook on the wall and carrying it to a fire stand. Asra is busy himself, opening various drawers and adding seemingly random ingredients to a basket he has looped over his arm. Iris petals, newt eyeball, and some shimmering gold flakes. You smile watching him, your gorgeous magician; smart and able.

In no time at all Asra has a bubbling pot of sweet smelling liquid stirring before him. You stand beside him, observing curiously.

"Why are you wearing gloves?" You ask, taking note of the large leather gloves that clad all the way up your lover's forearm.

Asra continues to stir and looks over at you, happy to hear your eagerness to learn. "I can't risk even a drop of this touching my skin. It's so strong, and will immediately absorb into anyone's skin, leaving them..." He shakes his head and trails off, amused. "That's why it has to brew so long, to burn off some of the potency."

Your mouth opens in amazement, taken aback by the idea. This is the real deal you decide, stepping back a couple inches in precaution. After watching the potion bubble for a couple more minutes you stretch and grab the watering can sitting by the floor of the door.

"I'm going to water the plants," you inform Asra, waving your hand briefly until the can is full of cool, crisp water. Gods knows there are at least three dozen inside and outside of the shop.

Asra is humming in confirmation that he heard you as you open the shop door to the plants hanging outside. You don't get very far before you're blindsided by a streak of purple darting through your legs.

Escape!

"Faust?!" You yelp, dancing around the squirming snake as she winds her way under and into the open shop. A loud, booming bark makes you jump again. This time a large hound dog is rounding the tight corner from the side street and barreling full speed towards you.

All hell breaks loose. The water can is up in the air, crashing wildly into the side of the building. You are thrown back onto the dusty floor and a mass of fur and teeth race past you, paying no mind to your yelling.

Help!

Faust is racing around the floor, narrowly avoiding the jaws of the angry dog she seemed to have aggravated. There's a large crash from inside and you cringe, hearing bottles break and wood crunch. You look back, scared at what you might find.

The shop is a disaster, papers strewn, vials broken, and potion pot toppled. Asra is groaning on the floor, obviously doing no better than the rest. You glance at him worriedly, taking quick notice of the potion he had been making spilled everywhere, even on him.

You snap your fingers and the dog's growl, who was cornering Faust by the bookshelf, turns into a whimper as you lift him up with your magic. "I'm sorry pooch," you sigh, "but we can't have you eating our friend." With a wave of your wrist the hound is out the door and down the street in an instant. The hinges creak and bell rings as the door is once again closed to outside.

Thank you!

Faust wriggles happily, red eyes glowing in relief. You guess she got up to some trouble with the local fauna. She slithers up the stairs quickly, leaving you to look around at the ruined shop.

"Ah, fuck," Asra's words cut through your thoughts like a knife. He's laying flat on the floor, chest heaving as though he just ran a marathon. Sweat glistens on his tan skin, covering him from head to toe.

You step over the broken bottles and kneel at his side. "My love?" You ask, unsure of what to do. It was obvious what had happened, it didn't take an expert. The potion that was supposed to be for your customer was now soaked into Asra's glowing skin.

Asra opens his eyes and you swallow hard. You know that look, and it nearly makes you start trembling where you sit. Lust is prevalent, clouding Asra's eyes until they're a dark amethyst color.

"You-" you start to speak but are cut off by Asra sitting up abruptly. His face is close to yours and his breath washes over your lips, hot and wanton. He looks positively desperate, just the sight of you sitting before him doing wonders.

"Please," Asra's voice comes out low and husky, he watches your chest rise and fall quickly as a result. "Can I please have you, right now."

You could almost call him asking like that soft and innocent, if it wasn't for the raw, hungry look he was giving you. His eyes were traveling everywhere across your body, leaving an invisible line that you could almost feel burning into your skin. Your lips parted and you let out a soft gasp, the power that kind of look had over you was astonishing. You shifted your legs under you subtly, feeling the result of the hot atmosphere low in your stomach.

"Tsk, tsk," you had to tease for a moment. "Closing the shop at midday for some fucking?" You reach up and cup Asra's cheek, feigning uncertainty. His skin on your fingertips burns white hot and you have to hide your amazement.

Asra's eyes narrow, he knew you too well. With a quick flick of his wrist you hear the deadbolt on the door slide into place. It's only a second later and both of his hands have found a place on either side of your hips.

"Why do you torment me?" he asks, pulling you close so your legs straddle him. "Can't you see I'm getting enough of that from this damn mistake of a potion?" His words are almost shaky, as though he can barely speak anymore. He presses his hips up to meet yours, and a soft sigh escapes his lips as he finally gets a little friction.

You dig your nails into his shoulders and gasp, the feeling of Asra so obviously in need is enough to make anyone go wild.

You can't resist grinding down lightly and Asra's eyes practically roll back at the sensation. "How can I say no to such a pretty face," you whisper, completely in love with his reaction.

That was enough for Asra and without added words he gathers you up in his strong arms and lifts you both. Your head falls back pleasurably when his lips find your neck. It only takes a few quick steps on his part to bring the two of you into the plush back room.

The purple cushions lining the cozy futon sink in gently as your back hits the mattress. The room has a slight pleasing haze as sandalwood incense burns at the table. The smell washes over your senses and a new wave of sensuality comes over the room.

Asra's hands hold you firmly as his lips continue to press lovingly into your skin. He hovers over you, one leg pressed between your legs, causing your hips to involuntarily move along his thigh.

"I need you out of these clothes," Asra groans, lips being stopped at your chest where your shirt has suddenly become a hindrance. He's already tugging at the hem, untucking the loose fabric from your waistband. You raise yourself to your elbows and help him pull the shirt over your head. At once it is thrown over Asra's shoulder and his eyes are set on your bare skin, drinking in the sight of his lover.

You smile at his admiration and lay back again, stretching your arms above your head and arching your back. You feel his hands on your stomach, traveling up to rest on your breasts. Your skin prickles with desire, flesh lighting on fire from his ministrations.

"How did I get so lucky," he breathes out, looking down at you with a look filled with love and passion. He rests the tips of his fingers on your nipples and swirls them lightly, leaving you to twist in torturous pleasure beneath his touch. "Everything about you is beautiful." Asra continues to flatter, lowering his head so his curls tickle your stomach. He licks a long line from the dip of your hip up to the valley between your breasts.

After a few moments of tasting your supple skin he moves his hands to the top of your skirt and tugs. You lift your hips in compliance and the fabric slides down your legs easily. Asra licks his lips as your body is finally fully presented to him.

"I could feast on you," he announces, voice lowered with need. "And I wouldn't go hungry in a lifetime." These words he whispers into your inner thigh, they tickle your skin softly.

You watch with bated breath as the man before you adores his lover. It's hard to keep your moans controlled as you feel his sinfully good tongue lick you in a way that can only be described as ecstasy.

Asra shifts into a more comfortable position, lying on his stomach and he brings your legs to lay comfortably over his shoulders. You shudder as you feel his hot breath flutter over your dripping slit. He doesn't waste anymore time and lowers his face to enjoy you.

Your thighs squeeze his head lightly as your body arches in response. Asra is devouring you as though you were a feast and it was the only meal he is to have in a lifetime. He grips your legs tightly to keep you from moving and covers your slit with his mouth, sucking for a moment on the tight nub at the top. He groans happily into your skin before moving down to lick your hole.

"Oh please, yes," you run your trembling hand through his hair and raise your hips up to meet his greedy mouth. He laps short, quick strokes first, stimulating you into madness.

After a moment he slows his tongue down to swirl languidly, looking up at you. You make eye contact and groan at the erotic scene of him eating you out. "That mouth of yours is too skilled for its own good," you whisper, fingers digging into his scalp, trying desperately to savor every swipe of his tongue.

Asra smiles against your folds. "I live to make you feel good, my dear." He says, pausing a moment. "You intoxicate me. Your smell, your taste. I couldn't get enough even if I had all the time in the world." He presses his lips on each one of your thighs with hot, open mouth kisses.

You blush at his words, feeling amazing under his praise. "Come here," you command softly, pulling on Asra's hair lightly to guide him back up your body. He kisses every inch of skin he passes before finally reaching your lips.

"Mm," he hums, taking your face in his hands. "But these lips, are like the finest honey in Vesuvia." He lifts your head so your mouths meet. It's a hot and feverish kiss, full of staggering amounts of love.

You press your body into his and relish in the feeling of kissing Asra. Your mouths are opened to one another and your tongues meet in fiery unison. While you enjoy the kiss you allow your hands to roam. Your fingers find his shirt buttons and you start to undo them as best you can, only a little distracted. It takes just a minute and you sigh happily into his mouth when you finally remove the annoying clothing.

You part a moment to admire the divinity of his body; prostrated before you. He was calling himself the lucky one, but you could probably make a pretty good argument for it being the other way around. He looked absolutely glorious in the hazy glow of the room.

As you reach for the waistband of his pants and rest your fingers playfully on the skin above it Asra breaks out in goosebumps at the fluttering feel of your touch.

"Ah," he breaths out, raising himself to his knees and closing his eyes. Clearly, he's enjoying the attention finally being on him.

"You are the one with the potion affecting them." You say, drawing a line from one hip to another. "It'd almost be criminal to ignore you for any longer." Your eyes fall to the bulge straining under Asra's pants, just begging to be free. A smile plays across your lips as his breaths quickens significantly.

"I.. wouldn't complain." He finally manages to say in a strained tone.

You smile, maybe a little too satisfied, and hook your fingers under the band. "I know." You chuckle, pulling. The trousers catch a moment on Asra's hardened length before slipping down to his knees. You take time to admire the sight before you, licking your lips. Asra is panting slightly, looking down at you lustfully as your eyes graze over him.

He grabs your head on either side and looks into your eyes. "Please," is all he can croak out.

You swallow thickly and you feel yourself dampen even more at his begging words. “I’d like nothing more" you say; need dripping heavily from your words. You lean forward and kiss the tip of his leaking slit lightly. Asra's body shivers with pleasure when your soft lips meet his aching shaft.

You take a breath before closing your mouth around his tip. Your cheeks hollow and you suck in deeply, enjoying the small sounds of pleasure emitting from Asra's lips. He groans even deeper as you finally swallow down his whole length, tip sliding down the back of your throat.

"Ah fuck, baby," he stutters through gritted teeth, fingers threading through your hair. He thrusts into your mouth without hesitation, reveling in the way you feel around him. The pace is fast and vicious, leaving no time for extra room for breathing.

You choke back your gasps and feel the involuntary tears prick at the corners or your eyes. Your hands fall to your sides as you let Asra use your mouth how he pleased. Licentious noises ring around the room as he sinks his member into your mouth relentlessly, moaning at each stroke and the salacious feelings that come over him.

His grip tightens in your hair as he pounds into your face. You open your mouth as widely as you can and take him in, ignoring the slight pain of labored breathing. The feeling of being used so mercilessly is intoxicating, and you close your eyes, enjoying the pleasure that overtakes you.

With a loud pop he pulls out of your drooling mouth, leaving you to be the one groaning in disappointment.

"I'm sorry love," he huffs dazedly, need heavy on his features. "But if I don't stop this now I'm cumming in your mouth."

"That doesn't sound so bad," you complain, sticking your tongue out so Asra can view how much you want it. His eyes darken considerably and he looks ready to break.

He takes a breath in sharply, steadying himself before holding your face gently in his hand. "As much as I want you fuck your face, that pussy of yours I know is dripping for me and I have to comply." He chuckles, running his thumb along your lip.

You whimper at his words, practically climaxing at the suggestion. You meet his eyes in a needy manner and nod. "Oh, Asra," you start, already seeing excitement flit across his face at the mention of his name. "I want you more than I can even describe to you."

To this Asra inhales sharply, thumb still hooked in your mouth. "Tell me how you want me," he says, barely able to contain his own desire.

"I want you to fuck me from behind," you begin, knowing exactly how to please his ears. "I'm going to cry and moan, and beg you for relief but you will know better." His eyes widen in ecstasy but you continue anyway. "I want you to give everything you can to me, without holding back."

Asra seems to snap right in front of you. His features immediately seem to plead for consolation. "You'll get what you ask for." He growls, fingers tightening in your mouth. You lick his thumb seductively and the action throws him over the edge.

Asra's hands fly to your waist and hold you firmly, you're flipped over; ass to the heavens greeting him. He swallows at the sight and digs both palms into the flesh, enjoying the feeling immensely. "So needy and ready for me," he groans, finger finding your entrance and slipping in easily. You gulp at the warmth of having fingers enter you. Asra is unrelenting and curls them cruelly against your walls.

"Just fuck me already!" You cry, unable to hide your desires anymore. You hear Asra laugh behind you, yet despite this you know he is dying to sink himself into you.

"Alright, alright." He concedes, taking your hips in his hands. "If you insist."

You feel his tip slide against your slit and shudder, craving the feeling of him inside you. It doesn't take more than a moment before you feel him start to enter you. You lay your head down, turning your face so you can watch Asra take you from behind.

His lips are parted in a silent moan as he relishes in the feeling of your walls around him. You sigh softly as he fully sheaths himself in you, a small tremor passing over your body from the pleasure. One moment, two moments pass as you both bask in the feeling of being connected.

"Give me your hands," he commands, slowly sliding in and out of you, giving no care to his agonizingly slow pace. Soft gasps are falling from your lips as you try to register his request.

Carefully, you cross your arms behind your back. It's no use to keep the blush at bay as you take in the dirty scene. Your face is pressed to the pillows, unable to move much as Asra takes your wrists and pins them to your back. Your ass is raised in the air to meet his rhythmic thrusting.

Asra grips one of your thighs with a free hand and quickens the pace a little. Your eyes shut tightly as your body responds. You can feel his tip hit deep inside of you with each snap of his hips. It's unrelenting and you have to catch yourself from begging for more.

You feel the fingers around your wrist tighten a bit as Asra's breathing speeds up behind you. You know that he's set on giving you as much painfully slow torture as he can manage himself, but you also know that potion is working against him. There's nothing he wants more than to let go and pound you into the mattress.

"Baby," you choke out, words bouncing along with your bodies. "I know you want to fuck me so good right now." Your voice is deep with seduction. "Please just fill me up like I know you want to." You finish your plea, watching his face with satisfaction. His eyes are darkened with desire. He takes just a few more strokes before slowly to a stop inside you.

"You asked for it," he warns. He only takes a moment to let go of your wrists and flips your body so you're facing him. He cages you in on either side and licks his lips as he stares into your eyes. His hungry mouth meets yours in a kiss full of fire. You can melt into it for only a second before you feel him grab your hips and pull you flush against him; Your cries drowned by his lips as he sets an erratic pace, skin meeting with loud slaps.

"Fucking hell," he groans, still kissing you between words. "You feel like heaven on earth. You're so hot, and I can feel your insides squeezing me." He explains, hot breath falling over your face. Your cheeks burn at his descriptions.

You loop your arms around his neck and press your chest into his. Your skin meets, shining with sweat and burning from love. Asra presses back, savoring the feeling of your nipples brushing against his.

You start to feel that familiar blossom of unreleased pleasure pool in your lower stomach. Asra's shaft is hitting you just right, sending jolts of satisfaction right to your core.

"Oh-" you stop and whine pleasantly when he shifts angles. "Fuck. Please yes, don't stop!" Your arms drop and nails dip into his biceps and you grit your teeth from the hot delight searing through your body.

"I couldn't even If i wanted to," Asra answers, words strained as his grasp on himself starts to crumble. His breath is leaving his lips in short pants now and you can almost see the resolve to hold on slip away before your eyes.

He falls into you, wrapping his arms tightly around your waist and thrusts into you with all of the strength he can muster. You bury your face in his neck and take hold of his hair. You can feel Asra's body shuddering to not let go.

You bring your lips to his ear and bite his lobe. "Won't you come for me sweetheart? Please empty yourself in me." You whisper.

Asra takes in a sharp breath and you hear him choke at your words. They were enough to push him over the edge and he rams into you with a low, strangled cry.

Your head falls back and your mouth opens in a silent scream as Asra lets himself go in you. Your legs shake violently of their own accord as you feel your orgasm wash over you, leaving your body in euphoric fire.

Asra's lips immediately find yours as you ride out your orgasms together. You kiss him passionately, all of your senses in overdrive. His kisses are soft, and sweet, a clear declaration of his love. Happiness rushes in like a flood as you enjoy the afterglow. After a minute Asra removes himself from you and joins you in laying down, sides still heaving from the activities.

"My dear, how I love you." He says with a smile, running his fingers in slow, soft circles on your stomach.

You turn on your side and look into his eyes. He looked content, and his cheeks were dimpled from his growing grin.

"I love you too," you return, hand falling into his. His skin was still warm. The two of you lay there for a while, out of breath and simply enjoying the presence of one another.

Eventually, Asra sits up and looks down at you with humor in his eyes. "Well, I think I can tell our buyer that we did an extensive review of his product and it does, in fact, work."

Your face breaks into a smile and you laugh at Asra's words. "Oh goodie, I'm sure he'll be thrilled to hear all about it."